#i could make this more interesting but that would be out of character for me

[swimming-karyss]

Sabo's fighting style analysis!! :D

Idk if this was done before or not, but I wanted to take some notes on Sabo's fighting style: I think it's really interesting, fun and rather unique! 

Let's get the obvious out of the way first - he's very strong, agile and fast. That’s a given. He breaks metal and bones with his bare hands.  His speed(both physical and of reaction) is something I especially want to commend – because it was emphasised a couple of times in the story! First in Dressrosa colosseum, as he was able to act against fighting fish and Burgess’ attack, and second, intercepting Burgess’s attempt to kill Luffy quite literally in a second!

Similar thing happened in the Reverie flashback: in an instant he evaded the guards. We don’t even see the jump itself – he notices the guards and in the next panel he’s already up on the rafter!(? Idk if thats the word) Not to mention, in that little time he managed to pick up Bonney as well!

Now, while I did say that he’s strong, he doesn’t usually rely solely on his strength to defeat his opponents. The first time we see him fight is the most fun one. The colosseum! Because in that fight he used a clever strategy - if you noticed he was actually directing Burgess’ attacks to destabilise the arena’s foundation and take advantage of it when targeting the colosseum’s core! Like - if you’ve seen hnk you should remember how Antarc broke down the glaciers - they first set weak points in the ice before dealing the final blow! (doesn’t only apply to fictional glaciers but I’ve seen a man ‘cut’ a solid piece of rock this way but I couldn’t find a video to show as an example😔) (no major spoilers in the video! only like. antarc's existence?)

He then used the broken arena to win the mera-mera no mi by a technicality! He didn't need to win by rules btw! The whole thing would be demolished anyway! He just decided to be witty and show off! He’s so silly, you can tell he is having a lot of fun. Literally being :D the whole time.

And using strategy and weak points in battle is the whole point of ‘finding a core’! His primary thing, that he even wanted to teach Robin ^^ And while even in childhood he was more level-headed and thoughtful in fights than, say, Ace, he’s still rather brash and daring. So it could very well come from his strategic and rational mentor - Dragon!

Ooh and look at him stealing that knife! And while that was to cut Luffy's ropes, in adulthood he often targets people's weapons first! That actually seems to be the RA’s signature - rather than overpowering their opponents with violence, they help and encourage regular people to stand up for themselves. Another reflection of Dragon’s disdain for war and likely also Kuma’s pacifism! The same way none of the captains use ‘normal’ weapons or conventional fighting methods, sometimes even preferring support roles. Hehe, you can see how the army and Dragon influenced Sabo’s character even through the fighting style! (actually, there’s a bit more about pacifism, but for now please just believe me that babo isn’t really allowed to kill)

But also Sabo doesn’t just get rid of their weapons in the fight with the marines, he uses the gun against the marine! The same way he takes advantage of Burgess attacks to destroy the colosseum. He uses these things to indirectly cause harm to his opponents! A roundabout way to bypass his mentors' pacifism "I didn't hurt them, they brought it upon themselves 🙄".

Also fun fact - Sabo’s dragon claw functions kinda similarly to Cipher Pol’s finger gun - they focus all the strength in singular points instead of spreading it on a wider surface. I vaguely remember this from a physics class - it may seem silly but it kinda does make sense?

And another thing which… may or may not be true depending on the interpretation. As I said, both his mentors are pacifists, and as someone who literally grew up surrounded by the RA’s values, I think Sabo actually doesn’t kill people.

Well, first of all, the main point of evidence - he originally intended to let Burgess go. The man whose actions led to Ace’s death. The man who tried to kill Luffy in front of Sabo. And yet Sabo lets him go and leaves with a smile. (Before Burgess intentionally riles him up, and Sabo loses his temper which he tends to do when his loved ones are involved. And that guy still survived didn’t he?)

Secondly, the Revs were so mortified at the news of Sabo killing king Kobra that it made it seem like it was the news of him dying again. Even with king Kobra being the good monarch that he was, the reaction seems too drastic for someone who has a history with killing people on impulse/driven by emotions/for fun.

And thirdly, he prefers to threaten people instead. In the sense he wants to appear threatening to his opponents. He tells Bastille that he can crush skulls easily without directly saying that it’d be his skull (well. Could depend on the translation) And after Fujitora’s meteor wiped out the marines he decided to aurafarm in front of the admiral with Bastille’s mask, even though it wasn't even him who actually defeated the guy.

He is really similar to Usopp in that regard - but Sabo actually has the strength to go through with his threats. And while he certainly enjoys enacting violence and frightening opponents, he tries to not take lives. He tries to be a bigger person (which may or may not be a part of his willingness to become a symbol for the revolution, he tries to push many ‘unnecessary’ or ‘unsightly’ things down)

Notably, the two times when he faces his opponents head on is with Fujitora and the second fight with Burgess. Both times included stalling the other side

To conclude this part, we can see that what he lacks in raw strength Sabo compensates with wits, agility and observation skills - he targets weak points and takes advantage of the environment. But his fighting style also has some flaws: mainly is that he mostly has single-target attacks, and the only one which allows him to affect/impact a large group of people is heavily dependent on the battle ground and can be used only once in the same area.

And now to his mera-mera no mi abilities. In short: they suck- cough couhg I mean they could use some work, compared to Ace’s.

You can see that he’s really inexperienced with his devil fruit. In Dressrosa he’s only getting used to it, be it attacking or turning into fire. He mostly uses fire fist as his main offensive skill, but he does try experimenting - with… questionable results? Burning dragon fist flame dragon king tries to combine fire fist and dragon claw, the things he has on hand, probably the first things that came to his mind.

And while we see him practicing on the Baltigo, the next time he didn’t really improve or came up with any fun attacks. ’Rook check’ is really just a ‘fire fist’ with a fancy name so Sabo could be witty and show off his understanding of chess and strategy in front of the most important people in the world.

But all jokes aside, the mera-mera no mi complements his existing fighting style nicely, in where he lacks range and power his fire powers fill in. You know, the way Ace and Sabo would’ve covered each other’s blind spots and weaknesses. And I think that Ace is the very reason that someone, as intelligent, creative and strong as Sabo, didn’t make much progress with devil fruit abilities. Mera-mera no mi is not just a weapon, but also the only connection Sabo has left to his brother. And if Ace had freedom to explore his fire abilities and be as flexible with them as he wanted, Sabo needs to overcome his grief first before he could see the mera-mera as an extension of himself, not just a memento from his late brother which he just barely deserves to use. The reason Sabo uses ‘fire fist’ so much is because it’s the only ability he knows for certain Ace had - it is in his very moniker.

All in all, I hope this analysis helped you get a better look at Sabo! And one more thing - Oda, please please please let him out to fight more he needs enrichment (and I need more material on him to dissect)

[thewayilikemycookie]

🎮┆nerdy talk .ᐟ

Spencer Agnew x f!reader

Summary: “you’re such a nerd bro, like just kiss me already” girlfriend and tomato level flustered boyfriend

Word count: 891

Okay, fine, you admit it: You have a huge thing for nerds (It’s not even a secret now given how much you talk about it). So, bagging Spencer Agnew out of all of them felt like you won the lottery everyday.

You truly love your boyfriend. You love whenever he talks about his interests, when you two play games together, when you get to watch him in his element, at the games stage, and literally everything else about him.

Currently, Spencer was sitting on the big gray couch waiting for the rest of the cast members. You sat next to him and made small talk with the crew until the start of the video.

The game you were playing today was more of a team game, so it was pretty fun for you to play into the dynamics with your fellow cast members while still trying to not do too bad at the game itself. About halfway through the shoot Angela asked a question about a specific part of the gameplay.

“oh it’s like a secret door thing” Spencer answered “you have to find a code hidden in the other levels, but we can just use this other door for now”

“How do you just know that?” Angela asked while following his instructions

“Gosh, you’re such a nerd, Spencer” you smiled at him “like just kiss me already, bro”

You whispered the last part, knowing the editors would most likely cut it out of the video. But nonetheless, Spencer’s whole face turned red from your comment. He hid his face with his hands immediately after seeing your amazed expression.

“Oh?” Angela gasped, already starting her signature laugh

“I’ve never seen your face do that” You smiled between your laughs, with no malicious intent in your voice

“Don’t do this” you could hear his muffled giggles, you could tell he was partly joking and partly a little embarrassed

“Okay, let’s move on!” Trevor announced, mostly for the camera, leaving Spencer with a few seconds to regain his composure. You noticed his cheeks were still a little pink and he seemingly couldn’t look at you without a smile growing on his lips.

After the shoot day, you and Spencer went back to his place for dinner and video games. On the way there, you picked up some take out from a drive through while talking about the new game releases coming this year. You loved listening to Spencer’s non-stop yapping about the graphics and the design and the mechanics and whatever he wanted to talk about, really.

The image of him being so flustered never once left you mind, though, and at some point he must’ve caught you staring, considering the weird look he was now giving you “What?” He asked

“Nothing,” You smiled at him “so, tell me more about that game trilogy” you changed the subject

He dragged out the suspicious look on his face, but ultimately decided he wasn’t going to push you “The horror one?”

You continued listening to him until you got home and the conversation dissipated. You ate your meal under the colorful television lights as you and Spencer watched a movie, legs all tangled together under the blankets. You would sometimes joke about certain parts of the movie, ending up doubled down laughing and having to re-watch multiple scenes.

You put your plates aside on the coffee table “Can we play that horror game?”

“Sure,” He beamed at you “do you want the controller?”

“Hell no” You cuddled up next to him

The game itself wasn’t too scary, but the jumpscares would always jolt you awake screaming, making Spencer hold in his laughter, not wanting to be rude. At a specific part of the game, where the character was walking down a hall and tensions were high, you could feel yourself getting increasingly scared.

“It’s crazy how they can build so much tension” You said, hugging his arm tightly

“I know” his whole face lit up with excitement “and it’s all in the atmosphere, like literally the little details, its insane. It’s like the song and the purposeful glitches and the lights and the scary pictures. It’s those small things that we wouldn’t notice otherwise”

“Gosh, Spencer, you’re such a nerd” You were fully staring by this point “like, literally just kiss me, dude”

In a matter of milliseconds, he threw the controller across the couch and cradled your face with an intensity you’ve never seen him adopt before. His lips met yours and you instantly melted from his touch, moving your hands to the back of his neck. You were almost sinking into the couch cushions, but you didn’t mind at all, never wanting to leave this moment.

He pulled away and placed little kisses on your cheek, nose and forehead “Got what you wanted?” He asked

“Yup,” You beamed “I can die happy now”

He laughed but didn’t quite pull away and you admired his smile.

“Can I tell you a secret?” Your hands moved to cup his cheeks

“Anything”

“I have, like, a huge crush on you, dude” You whispered, being met with his laugh

“can I tell you a secret too?” You nodded “I have a crush on you too”

You widened your eyes and opened your mouth in fake shock and he leaned in to kiss you once again.

A.n: guyssss I have like no time to write, idek how I managed this many words 😭😭 Also!! My requests are literally full, so I’ve been trying to select a few to work on (so I’m sorry if yours takes to long/doesn’t get picked). But pleaseee keep them coming!! They inspire me so so much <33 Anyway if you got to this point of my yapping I love you, thanks for reading, have a great day/night!!!!

[solivagant-1]

⋆˙⟡ Let the Light In ⟡˙ ⋆

Ch 2: Suspicion

Characters: Rumi x fem!reader

A/N: Happy to see so many people interested in the fic thus far!! Have some oblivious Rumi & Zoemira crumbs, as a treat. This one’s longer than the last and that’s starting to become a pattern for future chapters lol. Been trying to change canon to make Rumi & Jinu more BroTP than lovers, which means plenty of new scenes (some my own idea, some inspired by concept art) will be coming soon as well. Enjoy!

Y/N must be a demon.

Rumi mentally pats herself on the back for coming to that conclusion.

“Oh, I brought you a gift as well.” You reach into your purse and fish out a small organza bag filled to the brim with tea packets. “Bobby told me about your voice. These teas have worked wonders for mine when I was sick, I imagine they’ll work the same for you,” you smile innocently. The sight makes Rumi’s stomach do a backflip. Maybe two backflips, even worse. “I’ll be sure to bring you some more during practices so you don’t strain your voice.”

She accepts the bag and studies the packets silently. Chances are they’re better than the “tonics” Dr. Han prescribed to her. Your hands brush from the contact and Rumi fails to suppress a shiver that runs through her. 

“Thank you…” Rumi’s voice trails off when she sees very faint lines poking out under the collar of your fitted shirt. She’s close enough to really see your features, and there’s no denying that it must be your demon patterns. Her eyes narrow, startling you with the sudden change. “Or–or I can take them back! I’m sure I have the receipt somewhere.” 

“That won’t be necessary.” Rumi stated, her voice lacking her usual friendliness. Mira notices the change but doesn’t comment on it. Rumi knows she can’t do anything until she’s sure. And even if she is, there’s nothing she can do with Bobby still here.

Throughout the dinner, she just stares at you. Rumi perked up with every anxious tug on your collar. You tried to ignore it, but her gaze was hard to avoid. The staff needed to refill your water repeatedly because your excessive drinking was doing very little to calm your nerves. You were probably the only person on earth who could upset her in less than 5 minutes of meeting without doing a single thing.

Rumi can’t shake the feeling that she’s seen you before. In battle, no doubt. She can only imagine what grotesque form you have hidden underneath that insanely beautiful human disguise.

You were the first to offer to pay once the check came. Even though Bobby initially wanted to, and all the Huntr/x members were richer than god, a small part of you hoped that doing at least this one thing would help get you off Rumi's shit list for the night. You insisted on leaving with Bobby the second he announced his departure. Rumi gives you one last subtle glare before you leave. Fuck, I’m getting fired for sure. 

Once the two are out of earshot, Rumi turns to the group. “I don’t trust her.”

“But she seems so nice! Bobby was right, she seems perfect.”

Mira raises a brow, “You don’t think she’s good enough?” “I think she’s a demon.” That causes all of them to pause. “Don’t you guys think the timing is weird? A demon boy band shows up out of the blue, and now we have new staff.”

“Well to be fair, Bobby said he really needs some extra hands because of them. She doesn’t seem like a demon…” 

“But look at the Saja Boys! They all appear human, but we know the truth! Underneath their so-called hotness they’re just the same disgusting demons underneath. Y/N is probably the same! She’s like, impossibly pretty.”

Zoey and Mira exchange glances. “I didn’t see any marks…but, we trust your judgement. If she’s really up to something, we’ll get to the bottom of it.” Zoey frowns, “I’ll be so sad if she is. Me and Bobby really like her.”

Rather than working on a new song, the trio began tailing you for a whole half day after practice. Peering around corners with binoculars, dodging behind bystanders whenever you glanced their way. Zoey leaped into a bush. And yet, you seemed completely normal. Not one demon-like quality about you. The whole ordeal left them all tired (and Zoey pulling leaves out of her hair) and one less day spent working on the song. 

“This is hopeless” Mira groans as she flops back onto the couch. “Rumi, are you sure she’s really a demon?”

“She’s too attentive.” Rumi argues, “Y/N seemed so suspicious at rehearsal. She was always writing on her tablet or making secret phone calls. She could be a spy, leaking our choreo and lyrics to the Saja Boys!”

“She's our assistant manager. That's…kind of like her job?” Zoey shrugs, snapping off a twig that had dug its way through the holes in her knit sweater. 

“Now I know I can read people pretty well, but Rumi, you’re a whole different story. How much of the session did you spend looking at Y/N instead of memorizing the routine?”

Okay, maybe she spent a little extra time studying you, but she couldn’t help it. It was in the name of research. She noticed how the back of your tablet is filled with stickers of different aquatic life; ranging from sea lions to orcas to whales and many more. Meaning, you have to be a water demon. In Rumi’s mind, she was just connecting the dots!

Rumi deflects the question. “Then what were those marks I saw…”

“Rumi, don’t you think you’re overthinking this?” Mira asks. “Whatever it was you saw on her could’ve been anything. Maybe a scratch or a medical scar. I’m all for killing demons, but in all fairness, you’ve really never given her a chance.” 

“Maybe she isn’t working with the Saja Boys at all and is just trying to support us?” Zoey adds. “I mean, they may be strong, but even they couldn’t hide their patterns for very long.” Rumi looks pensively between the two. “I’ll…I’ll think about it,” she relents as she retires to her room.

Once she leaves, Mira turns to Zoey. “You think she’s gay panicking?” 

“I’ve never seen a gay more panicked.”

“Right…should we, like, do something?”

“I think it’s best we let her figure it out…”

Rumi closes the door behind her, leaning back against it. She could be wrong. But at the same time, she doesn't want to risk the safety of the group. She sighs disheartenedly, looking out her window for an answer. Instead, she sees…a crow with a hat? 

She tilts her head as she steps onto the balcony. “Is that a bird? Wearing a tiny hat?” The bird shrieks, revealing 2 extra sets of yellow eyes right under the first. 

“What?” The bird walks along the railing in an unbothered fashion towards the end of the balcony. Rumi follows with a gleam of curiosity in her eyes.

From the shadows, a set of bright glowing eyes appear behind her, followed by a low rumbling growl. Rumi gasps, materializing her saingeom to point it at the creature. The feline slowly emerges from the darkness, and Rumi needs a moment to comprehend the sheer size of it. It stalks closer and closer until it knocks down a flowerpot. The tiger brings its massive paw down to position it back up. It fails once. Then twice. On the third attempt, Rumi turns to the bird for an explanation, who only squawks the equivalent of a sigh. Rumi bends down to fix the pot upright. The tiger’s pupils dilate, stepping forward, only to knock it over again. She laughs, the bird tilts its head up and caws once more.

“No. No really, it's okay. Just leave it.” The tiger sits up. “What are you?” Rumi asks in awe. The tiger’s mouth opens and an object spills out from its tongue. Rumi picks up the slimy card. 

“Hello, friend.” It reads on the cover. She opens it to reveal a note written in Korean, “Jinu? Ji–Jinu? Oh, meet you? Ugh,” she scoffs, “I’m not gonna meet you. Who do you think you–” she yelps as the crow flies past her and settles on the tiger’s head. The tiger sinks into the swirling blue pool forming under its body. Its eyes don’t stray from the flowerpot as it vanishes past the Honmoon’s seal. Rumi leans over the railing and sees the tiger re-appear in the streets below. It only casts a brief glance at Rumi before it sets off, no doubt leading her to wherever Jinu is waiting. Rumi smirks, crumbling the note in her hand. “Okay, Jinu. Let’s meet.”

The tiger leads her to an empty shopping district with tiered eaves and stone statues. The area was lit by the soft glow of a few scattered lanterns. Rumi peers around the corner just in time to see the tiger jump into a building, disappearing completely. On the top of a roof, a figure stands with his back towards her. Jinu.

She parkours onto walls and roofs, twirling and spinning mid air until she reaches the top, drawing her blade. Rumi lunges. Her blade slices through his body with a deep battle cry. Its head rolls to the edge, turning out to be only a mannequin with a wig. “What?”

“Wow. I wasn’t expecting a hug, but–” Rumi yells angrily, pointing the tip of her blade to his neck. Jinu backs away with his palms held out, “Jeeze, okay, okay.” He jumps backwards onto the next building, Rumi still swinging. “Calm down, I thought the mannequin was gonna be a fun icebreaker,” he squats down, trying and failing to explain himself to Rumi. “But I see I was wrong.”

They jump onto another building because of Rumi’s relentless swinging. “Hey! I just wanna talk.” “Talk?”

“About your patterns? But first, I wanna talk about those pants,” he points down. “Teddy bears and Choo Choo trains? Really?” Rumi looks at him in disbelief. Jinu whispers a train sound that only serves to piss her off even more. She slams her saingeom down, “You were supposed to be dead!”

“Woah, hey! I could’ve told your friends what you are.” He holds his hands out in defense. Jinu vanishes in a purple mist, appearing on the other side of the roof. “But I didn’t, did I? Because they don’t know.”

Rumi gasps, giving it away. “Ah, I did guess right. A demon girl, also hunter. Hiding, walking around free in the human world.”

“Just hunter, not demon.” “Then how’d you get the patterns?” he points out. “Thats none of your business.” 

“Huh…I know what it feels like to have them.”

“Feel? You’re a demon. Demons don’t feel anything.”

“Is that what you think? That’s all demons do. Feel. Feel our shame, our misery. It’s how Gwi-ma controls us. Do you not hear him in your ear?” Rumi narrows her eyes at the new information. “What are you talking about?”

“Huh, you’re lucky. I’ll never forget the first time I heard him. That was 400 years ago.” He tells his story of his poor family, how Gwi-ma called out to him, gave him his voice, only to be condemned to the demon realm. “Every day since, I’ve been haunted by the memory of failing them. These,” Jinu holds out his glowing hands, “are a constant reminder of my shame. A shame I can never escape.” 

He looks down at Rumi, “Yours are a reminder too, of a shame of your own.”

Rumi’s gaze hardens, “You don’t know me.”

“You know you can tell me. I’ll understand. I’m the only one who can.” Rumi raises her sword to his chest, a signal for him to back off. “I’m nothing like you.”

“Denial, I get it.” Jinu walks backwards to the edge of the roof. “I was there once too. I’ll be here when you’re done pretending. Until next time.”

“There won’t be a next time!” Rumi grits out, raising her sword. Jinu disappears into mist before she can land a strike. She yells at the empty spot in defeat.

When Rumi arrives back home, she tosses her pajamas into a hamper and gets into bed. Now is not the time to think about him, but the fans. The signing event tomorrow will be the perfect distraction. No Saja, no Jinu, just Huntrix and their fans.

—

“The saja boys will sit with us!” 

Maybe it's not too late to pick a better career.

You were assigned mundane tasks before the event. Arranging all the signing materials, ensuring the limo would arrive on time, all simple things to ease Bobby’s workload. You thought you’d be able to just sit back in the sidelines and let Bobby handle the rest. After all, there wouldn’t be much else to do once the event started. But now that the Saja Boys are here, sitting between each idol no less, you’re forced to anxiously mend the chaos unfolding between the two groups. 

First, by finding a way to mask Mira’s reddening face from her growing annoyance as she sits between the pink haired Saja Boys, glaring fiercely at the two, and also at Mystery for whatever reason. You figured you’d start there.

Across the way, Jinu turns to Rumi. “I didn’t think you liked sharing.” “I love sharing.”

“Oh, so you shared your secret to your friends? Should I tell them?”

“No, I’m going to tell them, eventually.” Rumi glances down at the table, seeing you approach Mira from the side. Then looks at Zoey, whose grinning ear to ear while speaking to another fan. 

“Heyy Mira, want some water?” You hold out a bottle. She mutters a small “No thank you” while staring daggers at the back of Mystery’s head. If looks could kill…

“Well, if Mira isn’t thirsty…” Abby’s hand encircles your wrist, trailing it down until he grasps the bottle, “I’m parched, mind if I take this?” He asks with a smug grin.

A few fangirls scream and faint in the crowd which draw the attention of both Zoey and Rumi. Zoey brushes it off, seeing how repulsed you looked at the action and laughing when you snapped your hand back from Abby. But Rumi’s eyes remain fixated on the scene, feeling strangely uneasy at the sight.

“If you’re so confident about stealing our fans,” she whispers to Jinu, “why infiltrate our staff in the first place, then?” His brows furrowed. Rumi cocked her head to your direction, then he finally got the hint, His mouth twisted into a smile. “She is not one of ours, though I wish I thought of that.” Jinu admits, pleased at the way Rumi’s expression shifts into disbelief.

Could she actually be innocent? “And how do I know you’re not lying to me?”

He simply shrugs. The next fan who steals his attention gives Rumi the chance to mull over this revelation. Rumi casts her gaze back to your direction. When your eyes meet, she turns back to the stack of posters in front of her, face flushed a light shade of pink from being caught staring.

“Does she know?” Jinu asks. “Or is she just another person you’re hiding your true self from?”

“Are you whispering?” A fan, a girl with glasses and a bob, smiles between the two. Rumi and Jinu sign the poster quickly before handing it back. “Don’t worry, your secret’s safe with me.” She points at her cotton shirt with the words “Rujinu” painted on, along with a very interesting drawing. The two awkwardly laugh as the fan walks towards the other members.

“Thanks for coming~ No! Bad Saja Boy!” Zoey reprimands Mystery with an exasperated sigh after barking at yet another fan. “Y/N?” she calls out. You rush over, “Yeah, Zoey?”

“Do you happen to have a spray bottle?” You blink. What a perfectly reasonable item to have on hand. “...I can find one?” 

“Fantastic–Hey! No more barking.” Zoey swats Mystery’s head with her pen. Dear god these boys.

Rumi signs another poster. “I’m not going to talk to someone who's helping Gwi-ma.”

“I’m helping myself. Look, if I help him, he’s promised he’d erase my memories. And those voices in my head will be gone.” “Pathetic.” “I’m pathetic? You can’t even talk about your patterns.” Rumi crushes his foot with the heel of her boot. 

“Excuse me Mr. Jinu? I made this for you.” A young fan hands him a drawing. “Uh, for me?” He gently takes the drawing from the fan. Rumi looks over to see it, smiling at the image.

“Maybe, listen to those voices, instead of the ones in your head.”

Jinu stares at the drawing for a moment too long. He stands abruptly, gaining the attention of everyone in the room just by the simple action, “Unfortunately the Saja Boys have to run. Thank you everyone.” The fans chant their names, tossing bouquets of roses to each of the Saja Boys before they depart. 

As the event winds down, the group huddles around Bobby, whose eyes are glued to his phone. “The internet loves this, and the internet is never wrong!” 

Mira grabs the phone as Bobby speaks, “Rujinu! That’s genius…Zoeystery, where did they come up with that?”

“Mi-ro-mabby? Ugh.” Zoey’s smile dims for a split second. “You guys look cute together…” Mira clenches the phone tighter.

“Even Y/N is getting attention.” Zoey snatches the phone holds it out towards Rumi.

Rumi stared at the screen. “…what exactly am I looking at?” 

“Everyone’s arguing over what you and Y/N’s ship name would be. But no one knows what to call it since they have no idea what her name is. They must’ve loved how attentive she was. She’s the best!” Rumi silently wonders how all this is even possible. Until she remembers her fanbase—They see a second of eye contact and run with it. She’s pretty sure that’s how the Zoey and Mira allegations started a year ago.

As if on cue, Zoey jogs to the other end of the room to hand you back the spray bottle you lent her. Rumi’s eyes follow. 

Maybe she is wrong. She really hopes she isn’t. Because if she is, Rumi’s got a lot of making up to do.

Taglist: @blazemaster4014 , @ang3lz-lov3 , @rainbowmess823 , @honney-bonny

[pyreo]

very ace post I'm about to make here

I think I'm just exhausted by how much of everything has to be Hot Woman

of course I'm responsible for choosing a lot of media I engage with here, that might be what's degrading my tolerance level, but like there's no escape from Hot Woman

you look into any kind of artistry by a man who's great at drawing or painting etc... as soon as you look for more stuff you'll also encounter 'guess how small I made her waist in proportion to her boobs'. but like, you can't judge. everyone can draw what they like.

fictional women in male dominated spaces have always been idealised but it feels like that overton window shifted once they figured out they could get away with anything. but it's just fanservice right. but it's so unavoidable. waifuslop dominates as a moneymaker which ensures there'll be more of it. character designs are less tasteful sideboob and more 'outfit with nothing on the legs just straight up underwear and we're pretending it's normal'

fantasy setting with grotesque monsters to be killed? the monsters can also be Hot Woman. a game where you obtain and raise creatres, well, of course, those can also be Hot Woman! here at women we are all about being controlled and managed by someone else, and we will do a little dance for you.

It's not any one thing. it's just everywhere. there's so many fantastic artists online, and they're working very hard with their own styles and ideas to formulate their very own best Hot Woman. And they have amazing taste! I love seeing designs and creativity, and yet in the back of my mind I know it's a variation on Hot Woman, the cultural topic. The inspirational ideal. I do this too!! I make up a character and I realise that I have a chance to be part of the Hot Woman moment. Whatever I'm not, she can be. But instead of that potential being varied and personal, I'm leaning towards the mould I've seen so many times. I can be a part of Hot Woman too.

And I should be part of it, right? Because there's supposed to be common ground there right? I identify as a woman for lack of anything more suitable. I guess that's what I am. My body represents those same ideas I'm seeing. Some anime lady with boobs bigger than her head... and me. Both women. There's gotta be some overlap.

And it's not the kind of dichotomy that gets solved by 'we should treat men the same! more male fanservice!' to me. You cannot do any of this to men. We will never be culturally inundated by images of men in speedos with massive cockbulges in our daily lives, in ads, on posters. We will never have every blockbuster movie based around dynamic interesting women while a dude is thrown in the back somewhere and just has a small romance going on. We will never trope-ify men into broad flavours like 'cute and fun and helpful' or 'dark and tall and sexy (dubious)' to classify them from the POV of picking The One For You off the shelf. We will never have animes about schoolboys where people argue on imageboards about which one is 'best boy', the one who succeeded in being Commodity.

I don't know what to do with this. This is an idea that has escaped out the window. Women get hired to stand in front of things. I'm in spaces that don't want me and freely advertise it - every convention I've ever been to has stalls with body pillows and a woman who wants to be fucked on it. And that's me, apparently! That's what I am! I'm supposed to be like that. Hot Woman doesn't look like me - I'm unfortunate enough to sit in anime video game spaces where they can't even be an average weight, let alone having realistic diversity. But Hot Woman does have the appeal of weight while being thin, because now every girl - that's me! - has a random belt strap around her skinny thigh, with a meticulously drawn flesh pudge either side. She's thicc now. That's what thicc means, being underweight, having huge tits, an utterly flat stomach, and a strap on your leg that would cut off circulation.

This is a genre. Of course it's always existed. And how can I blame anyone for the fun of a fantasy, for idealisation, for people joining in without wondering if it could ever be different. Imagine a world, people say, where Hot Woman can ALSO... wear glasses. Incredible. Just imagine. She's still hot though. Hot Woman cannot be dulled or diluted, but we can expand her domain.

I don't know. Obviously nobody is doing this with the expectation that real life women should conform to a concept on paper. It's not coercive. There are women who choose to have vtuber avatars with boobs that fill the entire screen. That's what they want.

I should be grateful for the rows of sultry-eyed babes staring at me across the convention hall, because the next booth is gonna have children, girls who look maybe 6-8, on the pillows, right there among the families cosplaying together. So it could be worse. Sometimes the girls look visibly distressed. It doesn't really get mentioned. Nobody else is taking issue with it, I wouldn't want to be a killjoy. So it's fine. It's fine. Let's see some massive boobs, haha.

[writingfortoomanyfandoms]

Cool Points (Part 2)

Pairing: Lando Norris x female!Reader (pro footballer player)

Summary: Having fought long and hard for custody of her two younger siblings, Y/N was ready for smooth sailing at least until the F1-obsessed twins became teenagers. What she wasn't expecting was for Lando to come and turn her world upside down

Warnings: Swearing, a lil angst, talks of past child neglect and allusion to past child abuse, slow burn to start but largely just domestic fluff so we good

Word Count: 4,866

A/N: Part two - I hope you guys enjoy. There'll be one more part to bring us to present day, so just a lot of domestic fluff to come. Please let me know what you thought and if you'd like to see more F1 writing in the future ❤️

Part One

2022 (Age 22)

“Y/N - hang back a sec, if you would?”

Y/N slowed to a jog, gesturing to Tara to continue onto the changing room without her as she turned around to face where their coach, Jude, and captain, Liza, were standing. From one of the stands, she could still hear her siblings and Lando cheering - she was sure they had made a game of it, to see who of them could cheer the loudest for their training, but Y/N couldn’t particularly find it within herself to care.

“What’s wrong?” She panted, hands on her hips.

“Take a second to catch your breath,” Jude ordered. 

“Nothing’s wrong,” Liza said, practically beaming at her.

Y/N was going to miss Liza - she had announced at one of the training sessions the previous week that she would be leaving Chelsea. She had been Y/N’s captain ever since she herself had signed her contract when she was 18, and she knew it had been Liza who had vouched for her place on the national team both in the Olympics and the World Cup. More than that, she had been a valuable character witness during the adoption hearing for the twins, vouching for Y/N’s capability as a guardian to the two kids.

“Good work today,” Jude started. “There’s for sure been some improvement with your footwork - and your teamwork with Tara-"

“It’s like you’re telepathic sometimes,” Liza cut him off. “Which is exactly what you want for your midfielders.”

“Ah - thank you,” Y/N said, not quite sure what to make of the sudden compliments. 

“When Liza told me of her plans to leave, I asked if she had any suggestions for who should be named Captain,” Jude began. Y/N’s heart thudded in her chest as she began to connect the dots.

“I put you forwards,” Liza confirmed. “I think you’re ready.”

“I’ve been watching more closely for the past week and I have to agree.”

“I… I’m flattered,” Y/N began slowly. “But - my schedule, and there are others who have more experience.”

“Maybe - but the team listen to you, they respect you,” Jude informed her. “Just - think about it for now. We’ll schedule a meeting to go over it next week, alright? I know you have… other commitments.” As if on cue, there was another shriek of laughter from the stands and Y/N had to smile. “But we can work something out, okay?”

“I’ll… I’ll think about it.”

“Good man,” Jude said, clapping his hand on her shoulder. “Now - it sounds as though you’ve got some adoring fans to get to.”

“Yeah - sorry again about that. The Goblins insisted Lando come to watch training,” Y/N said apologetically.

“It’s nice to have them here - it’s been a while since you’ve brought them.”

“Despite my best attempts, they still have minimal interest in football.”

“A shame - suppose it doesn’t help that your boyfriend’s an F1 driver, he’s bound to be encouraging that.”

“Me and Lando aren’t together,” Y/N dismissed immediately. “But he definitely has a hand in their continued love of all things Forumla One.”

“I’ll certainly miss them when I leave the team, though,” Liza inputted, making Y/N roll her eyes.

“Please - when I told Haz you’d signed a new contract, she asked if I’d buy her merch for your new team because she wants to change allegiance. Absolute nightmare child.” 

“That’s my girl,” Liza laughed.

Y/N lifted a hand as she jogged away from her manager and old captain, her mind racing with thoughts of what they had proposed. When she got to the changing room, only Tara was still inside, brushing her hair out.

“What did they want? Offer you the captaincy?” 

“How’d you know?”

“We’ve been taking bets as a team,” Tara shrugged. “Which you’d know if you ever came out for team drinks,” she added, slinging her bag over her shoulder.

“I try and come for the first round!” Y/N protested, grabbing her towel and heading towards the showers. Tara followed her, leaning against the wall with a grin.

“And you always pay for the first round - which is why we keep you around,” she got a more serious expression then. “But it’s true, then? They made you captain?”

“They’ve asked me to think on it,” Y/N corrected, beginning to strip.

“You’re going to say no, aren’t you?”

“I don’t know - maybe.”

“Your twins would be fuming if they know they’re the reason,” Tara warned her.

As if on cue, there was a knock at the changing room door and the sound of Haz’s voice calling for her.

“I said I’d think on it and I will.”

“Talk it through with them - they’re old enough to understand and have an opinion, Y/N,” she hesitated before her grin widened into something sharper. “And tell Lando, I’m sure he’ll have plenty to say.”

“Don’t you have a date to get to?” Y/N laughed, not bothering to correct Tara’s words - her best friend knew exactly what was going on with Lando, and just liked to tease her about it. 

“I’m going, I’m going,” Tara put her hands up and turned away. “I’ll let Haz know you’re just showering.”

Y/N showered quickly and changed into some regular clothes before stuffing her kit into her sports bag and putting it over her shoulder. Haz was waiting outside, leaning against the wall opposite the door to the changing rom with her nose buried in a book.

“Sorry to keep you waiting, Queenie,” Y/N said, smoothing her hand over her sister’s hair. 

“Took so long I had to turn to studying,” Haz huffed, but there was a tiny smile tugging at her lips.

Y/N laughed, leading her sister outside, where Lando had managed to get his hands on a football, and was kicking it back and forth with Tony. Y/N raised her eyebrows at the scene.

“Thinking of switching sport?” She teased.

Lando turned around, a beaming smile on his face.

“You were awesome!”

“It wan’t a match,” Y/N laughed, ignoring the fluttering of her heart.

“She’s also great in matches,” Tony inputted quietly, kicking the football over to Haz.

“Of course she is!”

“You could come to a match,” Haz offered eagerly, booting the ball over to Lando.

“I’d love to!” 

“If you hang around until next year you could come to the world cup,” Y/N joked.

“Have you been selected for the team?” Lando asked excitedly. “Is that what they wanted to talk to you about?”

“They floated team selection, like, a month ago. I think the Olympics means that I’m likely going to make the team - especially since Chelsea’s at the top of the league anyway,” Y/N dismissed. 

“Well I’ll certainly still be around next year so I’m definitely going to hold you to World Cup tickets,” Lando informed her. His words warmed her from the inside out. 

She hadn’t expected to hear from him again after Silverstone last year - after they had kissed and she had insisted it couldn’t go anywhere, she’d assumed he’d lose interest. But that hadn’t been the case - instead, the opposite had happened. 

He had made himself constantly available to her - he’d text her about his strangest thoughts, and would send her pictures from the Paddock of his fellow drivers for her to show to the twins. He’d call her to listen to her worries about her siblings - offering words of support or just an outlet for her constant fears, and always tried to assure her that she was doing a good job raising them. 

Lando had even invited the three of them to stay with him in Monaco over the twins’ half term during the football off-season. It had been a brilliant week - Lando had organised a packed itinerary for them all, and Y/N knew that the twins were still bragging about the trip to their school friends.

If she was being entirely honest, Y/N wasn’t sure what she would have done without his support over the past year.

She had tried to return the favour - if she saw he’d had a hard race, or seemed distant over his messages she’d do her best to cheer him up. Either through sending him pictures of the twins messing around, or by recalling a funny anecdote of her own, or just offering a free ear if he wanted to complain. 

And at some point over the last year or so, she had started to believe that he really was here to stay.

“Come on - lets get some food,” Y/N said, receiving the ball that Tony kicked towards her. She picked it up and chucked it back through the door that she had just come out of.

“Rabbit food?” Haz asked, scrunching her nose in distaste.

“Only for your sister and me, you two can get whatever you like - my treat,” Lando assured her, sharing an amused glance with Y/N.

“What do you feel like?” Y/N asked the twins. 

“Pasta?” Tony suggested immediately, as Y/N knew he would.

Later that evening, the four of them were walking back through the streets of London - the twins ahead of them each holding an ice cream as they chatted about something to do with their friends.

“Thank you for watching them, by the way - I’ve not really said that yet,” Y/N said, breaking the silence at last.

“Of course,” Lando snorted. “I’d remind you that they’re good kids, but I think they’re going to start objecting to that soon.”

“I’m not ready for them to go full teenager,” Y/N groaned at the reminder. 

“Think they’ll be like you were?” Lando asked curiously.

“God I hope not.”

“Why? Were you a troublemaker?” There was so much glee in the question that Y/N had to think for a second about how honestly to answer. She didn’t want to ruin this, she didn’t want to break the causal, cheerful atmosphere around them.

Then she looked over at Lando, who was staring at her expectantly and there was something so achingly soft in his expression that she knew for the first time that she wanted to tell him everything - anything that he wanted to know about her, anything that he was willing to ask, she was willing to share.

“More like the opposite,” Y/N admitted, going for a casual shrug, but knew the movement was more jerky than she was aiming for. “I was scared of causing trouble. I… didn’t want to give my parents any more excuse to be angry, you know?”

Lando stops walking, reaching out and carefully circling his fingers around her wrist to pull her to a stop as well. There’s open fear in his eyes and Y/N wants to reassure him, wants to hug him and promise that everything is okay.

“Did they hurt you?” He asked in a whisper. 

Y/N tried for a smile, but knew it came out as more of a grimace. She carefully moved her wrist so that their hands linked together instead, and she tugged on their now joined hands to get him to start moving again.

“They were bad parents,” she told him in lieu of a straight answer. Lando sucked in a breath, but when Y/N looked at him again, he just nodded - apparently deciding not to press further. “I want them to feel safe enough to be… nightmares, you know? Like I’m dreading them becoming teenagers, but I hope that they feel safe enough to cause trouble at all? Does that make sense?”

“Yeah, it does,” Lando confirmed quietly. “I meant to say, by the way - my mum wants to meet you.”

“She what?”

“Well - she was actually asking if there was anything she could do to help you out with the twins,” Lando clarified, “and then said I should bring you three for dinner some day,” and Y/N laughed. 

“You talking to your mum about me, Norris?”

“Is that such a surprise?”

Y/N had to look away in the hopes he wouldn’t see the embarrassment at how earnest he sounded. He chuckled lowly and squeezed her hand.

“Well that’s very kind of her.” She hesitated before adding: “And you.”

“Of course, Cap,” Lando said softly.

“Oh! That reminds me!”

“Yeah?”

“Guess who’s being considered for Captain?”

“At Chelsea?” Lando asked excitedly. Y/N beamed and nodded.

“I mean I’m not sure I’m actually going to accept and-“ Y/N began to ramble, before being cut off entirely.

Lando whooped and dropped her hand. But before she could mourn the loss of contact, his hands were on her hips and he was lifting her up to spin her around. A laugh bubbled up from her and she locked her hands around his neck, desperate for balance. He placed her back down carefully on the ground and they grinned at each other, the moment finally broken by the twins questions.

“You’re sure you're not together?” Haz asked.

“Has something happened?” 

Y/N saw a flash of pain in Lando’s eyes, and Y/N ached with want.

But rather than closing the gap between them further, she cleared her throat awkwardly and stepped out of the safe circle of his arms.

“Jude’s asked me to consider taking over as Captain,” she told them, forcing herself to keep her attention on them and not Lando. Trying to remind herself that remaining just friends was for the best.

2023 (Age 23)

“Is that the Captain of a world cup winning team I see?” Lando’s voice was loud even over the thumping of the music playing in the club. 

Lando was sitting back on a couch in the VIP section of the club - his legs were spread out beneath the table, and he was wearing a white shirt which was only half buttoned up. His eyes were slightly glassy, his hair was a mess, and one hand was clutching a glass that looked on the verge of being spilt.

There were some girls at the table too, one of them clearly vying for Lando’s attention - and Y/N had also recognised several of the other drivers on the grid as she had walked through the club in the search for her friend. Many of them had called out greetings and congratulations to her, recognising her now from the amount of time she had spent with Lando over the years.

The jolt of envy that ran through her from seeing the pretty girls around Lando was quickly extinguished with how her friend’s face had lit up in a bright grin at the sight of her and how he had immediately tried to stand up, knocking into the table in front of him.

Y/N snorted as Lando pushed at the people blocking his exit, and practically fell into her, narrowly avoiding spilling his drink down her back as he hugged her.

“Congratulations!”

“You've already said that,” Y/N reminded him, hugging him back tightly.

“Not in person! You didn’t come to the Paddock,” Lando pulled away with a pout.

“I’m sorry,” Y/N laughed. “Tara wanted to explore and I felt bad just leaving her.”

“She could’ve wanted to explore the Paddock,” Lando huffed, but it was short lived as he grabbed hold of her hand instead and began to pull her through the club.

“She came to the race today with me! Where are you taking me?” 

“To get a drink - you need to catch up!”

“Tara and I had a couple before we got here,” Y/N promised him, though allowed him to continue to lead her through the crowds. 

“Where is Tara? I wanted to say hello.”

“She immediately got waylaid,” Y/N admitted. “I’d be surprised if she makes another appearance tonight.”

“Really? Good for her!” 

“Jealous, Norris?”

Lando turned back to look at her, eyes crinkled with mischief.

“She’s not the footballer I’m interested in.”

Y/N’s heart skipped a beat, but she just laughed at him.

“I never said - but you drove well today,” she said in an attempt to change the subject. She lent against the bar beside him as he ordered on her behalf.

“I didn’t win or anything,” Lando dismissed immediately.

“You still drove well,” Y/N shrugged. 

“You think?” Lando asked, his words more vulnerable than usual. 

“Of course I do,” Y/N responded.

Lando seemed to hesitate for a moment before drawing her into a tight hug again.

“I’ve missed you.”

“I’ve missed you too,” Y/N whispered. “I’m sorry I’ve been so busy.”

“Don’t apologise! You’ve been killing it, Cap.”

“I know - I just wish…”

“Yeah… I know,” Lando agreed with a soft smile. “Missing the twins?”

“You have no idea,” Y/N groaned. “They were so mad when I told them they couldn’t come  to the Netherlands to see you. But they stopped complaining as much when I said they’d be staying with your parents.”

Lando took the two glasses being offered to him and handed one off to Y/N, before taking hold of her hand and pulling her back through the crowd towards the table.

“They’re would’ve been welcome,” Lando informed her, squeezing her hand.

“I know,” Y/N agreed, taking a sip of her drink. “But Tara’s been on at me to take some time for myself, you know?”

Lando focused back on her, eyebrows raised in surprise. Y/N squirmed with embarrassment at his considering gaze.

“I’m glad,” he said at last, his smile slowly creeping back across his face.

“Yeah?”

“Course - even if I do miss my personal fan club,” he teased.

“I can’t believe Haz finally changed allegiance,” Y/N groaned. 

“I can’t believe it was Oscar that made her,” Lando laughed. “You have no idea how betrayed I was when she told me.”

“She’d determined she’s going to be his race engineer one day,” Y/N confided. 

“She's wearing Papaya and that’s what’s important.”

“Tony’s always going to be rooting for you, Lan, don’t worry.”

“And every other weekend I get your undying support too, right?”

“I don’t know,” Y/N teased. “The twins are old enough that they want my support anymore - maybe I’ll start wearing red instead?”

Lando downed his drink.

“You want to say that again?”

Y/N bit her lip. She hesitated, then mimicked his action, grimacing a little at the strong aftertaste.

“I’m just saying - I think Charles Leclerc might be my favourite driver on the grid right now.”

“Charles Leclerc had a DNF today,” Lando said, his voice carefully measured.

“It happens to the best drivers,” Y/n shrugged, reaching behind Lando to place the empty cup on the table. Lando did the same, though kept his careful gaze on her.

“Bold words for someone who voiced their support for me on TV today,” Lando said.

“You saw that?” Y/N squeaked, unable to maintain the teasing in the face of the interview she had been drawn into earlier that day. 

Her and Tara had been approached where they had been watching the race, having been recognised from their recent win in Australia. They had just asked a few questions about that last match - some jokes about how they were celebrating the win by coming to the Dutch Grand Prix, and then asked who they would be supporting for the day.

Y/N had answered with Lando’s name without thinking, not really expecting that it would get back to her friend. 

“Of course I did,” Lando chuckled. “And, your brother texted me about it.”

“Little snitch!” 

“It’s called loyalty!” Lando exclaimed. “Which you also showed - so don’t try that shit about being a Ferrari fan!”

“I just don’t want you getting a big head,” Y/N told him. “I’m going to keep you humble right up until you get your World Championship - then I’ll let you start bragging."

“Until? Not if?”

“When you become World Champion,” Y/N confirmed. “Not if.”

Lando bit his lip, then grabbed both of her hands.

“What are you doing?”

“Come on - we’re going to dance!”

“No! No we’re not!” Y/N immediately argued, half-heartedly trying to pull away from him. Lando just tightened his grip, beaming at her and tugging her into the mass of moving bodies.

“Yes we are!”

“I’m going to need so many more drinks before I start dancing, Lan,” Y/N protested, even as she allowed herself to be pulled. She knew she’d do anything that he asked of her. Anything that would keep that smile on his face.

“That’s something I can manage.”

The next couple of hours passed in a blur - Lando hardly left her side all night, periodically dragging her to the bar for another round of drinks or shots, before pulling her back to the throng of people dancing. Occasionally they would be joined by someone else - Tara made a brief appearance before going home with the woman she had pulled when they first got to the club, and some of Lando’s fellow drivers and their girlfriends would join them every now and then. Once in a while, they would be tugged into a group photo, their fingers laced in most of them, and if that wasn’t the case, then Lando’s arm would be thrown over her shoulder to pull her into his chest.

But by the end of the night, it was just the two of them left.

Three in the morning, and Lando was once more tugging her by the hand to lead her out into the cool night air, having stopped to collect a jacket from the cloakroom along the way.

“Where about are you staying?” He asked, and his voice was hoarse from having been singing along to the songs all night. 

“I’ve got an Air BnB like… fifteen minutes away from here,” Y/N’s voice felt loud in the sudden quiet of the night, but the alcohol still in her system stopped her from caring too much. 

“Let me walk you back?” Lando sounded hopeful.

Y/N gave an over-dramatic sigh, just to hear him laugh again.

“I suppose I’ll allow it.”

They set off down the street, Y/N pulling out her phone to navigate. But she quickly got distracted by the messages on the home screen. The first of which was from Lando’s mum, who had sent her a picture of the twins helping out in the kitchen.

“Everything alright?”

“Yeah - just your mum was sending me updates,” Y/N confirmed, angling her phone towards Lando so he could see the picture.

“She was so happy you asked if they could stay with her,” Lando said, swinging their still joined hands.

“She offered first!” Y/N said defensively.

“I know! I was being honest! She was so happy, Cap. She just wanted to help you,” Lando shot her a sly look. “Her and Tara would agree that you need to take some time for yourself.”

Y/N squeezed his hand.

“I’m trying.”

“I’m happy to wait,” Lando told her, answering what she didn’t say.

“I can’t… ask you to do that.”

“You’re not asking me to do anything.”

“I don’t want you to have to wait, Lan.”

“Sometimes you look at me…” Lando trailed off and shook his head.

“What?”

“It doesn’t matter,” he dismissed. “Are you cold? Do you want my jacket?”

He didn’t let her answer, dropping her hand so that he could instead wrap his jacket around her. Y/N allowed herself to be moved, but when Lando tried to walk on, she snagged her fingers in his shirt and he immediately stilled.

“Tell me.”

“Sometimes you look at me, and I think you’re talking yourself out of it. Like, the wait could be over, but you’re looking for excuses and telling yourself to hold off.”

“Lando-”

“And it’s okay, because I will wait,” he continued, staring at a point over her shoulder. He was still smiling, but it was sadder, more troubled than before. “Of course I will. Until you’ve convinced yourself I’m going to stay, or that I love your siblings as much as I love you-“

“Lan-“ Y/N’s eyes widened at that confession, her heart dropping.

  “And I don’t know, maybe I’m delusional, because I will wait. And being your friend is enough for me. Because I may have started wanting something casual when I first messaged you, but this is so much more to me now. You and the twins - you’re everything to me, Cap.”

“You love me?” Y/N managed to get out. 

When Lando at last met her eyes again, there was no denying the fondness in his expression, and he reached to smooth down some of her hair that had gotten messy in the club.

“How could I not?”

Maybe later, she would blame it on the night. On the atmosphere, of the amount that they’d had to drink, of the fact that she was still riding the high of her World Cup win. Or maybe how he was looking at her, the same way that he always looked at her, only this time she was letting herself see it, and letting herself believe him.

But she surged forwards, reaching up to pull his face down to hers, connecting their lips. Lando made a muffled noise of surprise, but responded quickly, pressing forwards immediately - his hands went to her cheeks to pull her closer, and his tongue swiped across her bottom lip, asking for access.

She opened her mouth for him, and felt one hand drop down to rest on her waist. She allowed her own fingers to tangle in his hair, clutching at the soft strands, desperate to hold onto him. She closed the last minute gap between them, stepping so that she was pressed up against the hard line of his body, and Lando sighed gently at that last piece of contact.

Then, he pulled away, his face dropping to rest in the crook of her neck, his lips pressing gentle kisses to the exposed skin there. Y/N continued to run her fingers through his hair, and she felt his lips turn up in a smile at the sensation.

“Tell me now,” he whispered.

“Tell you what?”

“That this is just another kiss we’re not going to talk about. Tell me now, straight-up so I’m not agonising over it later.”

“I don’t want to,” she admitted in a small voice.

“Yeah?” Lando asked, finally pulling away so that he could meet her eyes. Y/N gave him a wobbly smile.

“I love you too," she managed to get out. “For what it’s worth.”

Lando brushed another kiss against her lips, grinning.

“Everything. It’s worth everything,” then his smile dimmed, his eyes searching hers. “There’s a ‘but’ coming, isn’t there?”

“I can’t… put you first. You deserve someone who can,” Y/N said at last, idly playing with the hair at the back of his neck.

“That’s all?” Lando asked, smile brightening again. “Darling - that’s not news. You’re a sister first, I get that. It’s one of the things I love about you.”

He went to kiss her again, but Y/N ducked away.

“Lando, I’m being serious. I just… I don’t want you to be upset when I have to put them above you. Because they will…” she sighed. “They’re always going to be first to me. And I know that’s not fair to you, which is why-“

“I know,” Lando laughed. “I know that’s why you always pull away. I know they always come first. I know you’re worried about my relationship with them. I know you, Cap. I promise. I know all of it, and I still love you, I still want to be with you, okay?”

“Our dates are going to be crashed all the time,” Y/N warned him. “And I spend half my free-time teaching myself their homework to help them study. And the other half is spent ironing their uniforms.”

“I’ll spend our dates ironing happily.”

“That was not the take-away!” Y/N laughed. Lando kissed her forehead, still grinning.

“You’ve told me you loved me, the rest is just a bonus,” he joked.

“I’m trying to give you an out!”

“I know - I don’t want it,” he responded cheerfully, kissing her again.

“Tomorrow,” Y/N said decisively, pushing him away - not that there was much force behind it.

“What?”

“We’ll talk about it properly tomorrow, when we’re not drunk,” she insisted.

“Promise?” 

“You sound so eager,” she laughed, turning away and reaching for her pocket for her phone.

“I’ve been waiting for this for, like, two years. Since we met in person at least,” Lando promised her, immediately going to tangle their fingers together again.

“For a conversation?” She joked.

“For this conversation,” he agreed.

Y/N bit her lip to try and stop herself from smiling too wide. She would wait to see what sobriety brought, though her instincts were telling her that this was it. That nothing she would say when they woke up would dissuade him. And she was tired of pretending that she wasn’t in love with him, tired of pretending that she didn’t think that her and Lando were endgame.

[galactic-rhea]

my favorite part of the prequel trilogy is how Padme couldve just gone back to Tattooine and bough Shmi at literally any point between the phantom menace and attack of the clones

That's great, Anon! Do you want me to pat you on the back and congratulate you? Here here kitten, come closer!

On a more serious note, in case you aren't being intentionally mean spirited, while yes, Padmé could have, technically, done more; but she was also fourteen, inexperienced and she had to stick close to regulations and politics to her planet and the republic, and Naboo went through a crisis, she's going through a lot on her own. There's also the chance that she expected the jedi order to do something about it, considering they took in Anakin.

Overall I do think it adds to the tragedy if you see it as a kind of parallel to Anakin's life, in that she's actually trapped to play by the rules of a system. In theory she could be able to do more, but didn't and not because she really didn't care or because she's bad but because she's actually trapped into a role that seems like she has lot of power but there's actually very little control to do any meaningful change that isn't killed by a slow due process of bureaucracy and corruption, similar to how Anakin, in theory, could have sneaked out of the jedi order earlier but he didn't because he feels tied by his role; despite of being a jedi he's just a single person that feels under the pressure of what a jedi can and can't do withotu permission.

I also like that it adds another whole layer of guilt for Padmé herself, she isn't directly responsible but she carries the guilt either way, especially when Anakin returns to her life. Padmé isn't flawless, she isn't a girlboss and her role as a queen may be privileged but she was still naive (and also she was palpatine's political apprentice), she isn't always right, she does have privileges and moments of dubious morality, and you bet that she probably had to work with senators she disliked and were shady in order to pass some important bill for the greater good; she IS a politician and politicians main skills are being fricking sneaky; add to this that she was stupidly young.

AOTC starts with Cordé's death, and she feels directly responsible by it, but she isn't able to express much of it at all, so this is a theme for Padmé's character. This is probably why she insisted on going along with Anakin to return to Tatooine, this probably played a part on her being so sympathetic to Anakin after he explained what he did to the sand people, this also plays a part on her deciding she isn't going to sit by and pushes Anakin into ignoring the council's orders and going to help Obi-Wan.

I also think is very wrong to consider TPM! Padmé as exactly the same as AOTC! Padmé and ROTS! Padmé, in the sense that her character went through an evolution, much more subtle, but i think is important because it parallels both Anakin's evolution and the Republic's evolution into a fascism state. What Padmé during the clone wars or during ROTS could've done, is not necesarily what Pre-AOTC! Padmé would have done because before AOTC there was relative peace and she probably had more faith in the politics, in the sense that Pre-AOTC Padmé probably would abide by the rules much closely and hesitate to do something outside her jurisdiction, and is in fact this why I believe Padmé during TCW is so ready to throw hands and do things by herself.

And ultimately it adds to Padmé feeling betrayed when Anakin killed so many people to keep her alive; because so far all of Padmé's arc has been about surviving but having to watch others die or suffer; sit by in a privileged role, making speeches and bills after bills to try and save a Republic that was already rotten and her tragedy is that she played a part in that Republic, and now Anakin doubled down on that and it finally breaks her.

So yes, is actually an interesting thing to discuss about Padmé! And I actually think it adds to the tragedy that Anakin seemed to be the only person that remained distressed and concerned about Shmi's situation. But the people that use it usually come off as very annoying for thinking they have a "gotcha!" moment to hold against ppl who like Padmé, lol Alas, peace and love anon

[luvpocket]

just look at me - geum seongje

pairings: geum seongje x female reader

author's note: caps off on purpose. i know this is a mess (mostly just dialogue) but i was feeling corny. i'll update the other story when i get my period again (i'll feel like reading and writing angst then)

genre: fluff, mild angst with good ending, reader is insecure, aged up characters

warnings?: mdni, mentions of sex, cursing

word count: 6077

the night fell and all your armors came down with it. you had learnt from a very young age that manifesting your true emotions only came with consequences. and the consequences would only be greater if these feelings were directed to an almost gang leader.

no one had ever reciprocated you. you hadn’t felt much for many neither, but you swore this time was different. it always seemed nearly impossible, but now it looked fully unattainable. yet, this was the one time you felt it different. you questioned yourself every damn night: the one time you have real, true feelings about someone, you decide that that someone has to be seongje.

seongje. the most emotionally unavailable person to ever cross your path. even more than you — and damn, that was already some big competition.

it probably felt comforting because you knew your non-reciprocated feelings were not only for you. it was not a personal thing: not about your looks, your position, your way of being. you could just blame his seeming incapacity to truly want someone that way. to not discard the girls he slept with like the cigarettes he flickered. and even if it were because of your person itself, you would never know, and that was enough.

you didn’t even understand why you were wondering so much — no one would ever know about this stupid crush. you didn’t even know if it was a crush, or why you even felt it. when you joined the union, everyone warned you about seongje. but when it was time to actually interact with him, it was weirdly comfortable. you remembered your first mission, to which he came to help by the end of it, to finish the job off. of course you knew he was just following orders from above, but he helped you get up when he saw you laying on the ground. he also told you about the events of his evening on the way back to the bowling alley, how he had had to fight a guy who had been stealing phones from the union, while you were in tears and disassociating the whole journey. it was a simple action, but it was comforting knowing it came from seongje himself, and also knowing no one had had good intentions with you for a long time.

you weren’t friends, you didn’t even know if he had any, really. but when the missions ended and you two were alone, he spoke. you just listened, not reacting much, too afraid to mess it up. but you showed interest, nodding along or humming, not being able to hold eye contact either — not only because you knew the consequences of it, but because you were incredibly awful at it. and you, who had practically been in an unwanted social isolation for months, were really appreciative of his attempts at holding conversation, even if it was more like a monologue. too appreciative, in fact.

you guessed the lack of social interactions had messed up with your synapses. you didn’t even know how to differentiate politeness from friendliness from romantic feelings anymore. so when a random girl at the bowling alley suddenly made small talk with you while you were waiting for orders, your heart almost beat out of your chest with excitement. the joyful feeling became even greater when the girl casually mentioned a party at the usual club the members met at, and you being invited if you wanted to go. the club was actually a scenario that came out of your own nightmares, but you couldn’t say no to the minor possibility of making at least one friend. your loneliness and the urge to talk to someone was making you desperate.

you were glad you said yes, though. it was a saturday night and you were thinking too much. mostly about him. you remembered how, back when you hadn’t joined the union and you had friends, you used to drink your emotions away every weekend. so you wanted to do the same that night.

you felt really out of place, though. you came in on your own and when you entered the club, you weren’t sure where to go or whom to greet. you didn’t even know where the girl who had invited you was, or if she would even remember you. you immediately realized that it was a mistake to go without being friends with anyone, but you decided to go with the flow. just for one night.

you sat at the bar and asked for a drink, which you downed in no time. you craved for that drunken state, for your inhibitions to go away. you quickly ordered a second one, just looking around to see if you recognized anyone.

and then you saw him. sitting down, presiding over the table, while a stunning girl was straddling his lap, kissing him. you stared, the alcohol already having an effect on your body. he returned the kiss from time to time, then went back to drinking from his glass and smoking the cigarette in his hand. he also made comments to his friends while smirking, but you weren’t able to hear what they were saying because of the distance and the loud music.

you couldn’t deny it to yourself: the scene was making you wish you were her. fuck it, even being one of his friends in the table, just to see him like that up close, would be enough. you ordered another drink, wanting to forget about the image.

when you finished your fourth drink, everything that passed your sight felt like a blur. you weren’t thinking anymore, just walking, feeling the sudden urge to move. you went to the club’s main dance floor, not being able to feel embarrassment anymore. you started to dance alone, singing the parts of the songs that you remembered, slurring the words. suddenly, you felt a pair of hands roaming over your hips, picking at your dress.

“hey, sweetheart. you alone here?” you didn’t recognize the man’s voice. you just felt his hands on you too much, but you weren’t responding because you weren’t conscious enough. you just kept dancing, not even answering.

“mmh, not a talker, huh? wanna go straight at it?” he said, while spinning you around. even though you weren’t processing the situation properly, you felt uncomfortable. his hand came up to your waist, so you tried to pull away, but he didn’t let you. you started to panic.

“h-hey. let go.” you said to the man. but he kept rubbing off against you, not listening.

suddenly, as your tears started to come out, the man was pulled away. he was taken by the collar of his shirt and dragged away from the crowd. it was too quickly to process — you didn’t even see how it happened, or who did it.

you decided to go the bathroom, in the need of washing your hands to feel a little less filthy. you then chose to go out for some air, starting to sober up after that whole situation. you were just processing it, becoming conscious of the strange man and his sudden disappearance, not being aware of your environment.

“i was starting to think i needed to check my prescription again.” you froze. you definitely did recognize that voice, the one who talked to you through your disassociation time after every mission. “you were the last person i expected to see here tonight.” seongje said, while blowing his cigarette. right after that, he moved his foot, suddenly pressing against a beaten up body on the floor that you hadn’t seen. it was the man. your mouth fell open at the bizarre situation.

“now you can say thank you.” seongje said while smirking.

you stayed silent. you never talked to him, you didn’t even know what to say in normal scenarios, what was supposed to come out of your mouth then? after a minute, you decided to speak, just to make the interaction as short as possible.

“thank you. i was too drunk, and i-i couldn’t move. i’m glad someone was there.” you said while looking down at the floor.

“i was there. this is kind of my natural habitat, you know? but what are you doing here exactly?” you were shocked at his remark, but you dismissed it.

“a girl… a girl invited me. and i haven’t gone out for recreational time in like… forever. so i wanted to give it a try. it was a depressing try but, yeah…” god, why were you so awkward? you quickly shut yourself up, realizing you might need to take a social cues specialized course if you ever wanted to make friends again.

“where was that girl, huh? i mean, when this fucking bitch was groping you.” he said, while kicking the unconscious man lightly.

“i-i mean, she invited me but that’s it. i don’t even know her name… by the way, will he be okay? the last thing i want is to get in any trouble tonight- or like… ever.”

“he will be okay. he practically does this every weekend. and he always gets the same outcome.” you smiled unconsciously at the thought of him helping people, even if he was the most feared man in that club. maybe that was why so many girls were head over heels for him, you included. you all fell for the basic treatment of a man framed differently from the usual.

“so you basically work here unpaid? as a bouncer?”

“i never get involved.” he said, simply. but those words made your stomach turn. why did he get involved tonight, then? and did he just let girls get groped when he had clearly noticed it? you probably looked lost in your train of thought, since he started explaining himself. “i just tell the other guys, since they all wanna act like saviors with girls. they might wanna fuck them after their heroic act, you know? i’m always up for a fight and you know that, but alcohol kind of calms me down. i get a little lazy, so it’s no fun.” he said, casually.

“well, thank you for your special service tonight, then. weren’t no guys available? mmh… i know you were the one to interfere because i’m not fuckable enough, so don’t worry.” you said while smiling lightly, letting a bit of your personality out now that you were a little comfortable, some alcohol still left on your body.

“this is the most you have ever talked to me. now i just have to get you to look at me and i will be a happy man. that stupid fucking rule doesn’t exactly apply to you, you know that?” you stayed silent, fidgeting with your fingers in disbelief. happy man? from looking at him?

“whatever you took tonight… man, i would love some. you sound really fucked up.” you said nervously, chuckling a little to try to calm yourself down. humor was clearly your coping mechanism, but it wasn’t working so effitiently that night.

“never been more sober in my life.” he said plainly, while blowing his cigarette again. meanwhile, you were sure you were at the verge of cardiac arrest.

“look… i-i am not trying to be disrespectful. i know you are important around here. but i would prefer it if you didn’t get me involved in any kind of like… joke or mockery. i’m too slow and definitely too sensitive for that.”

“come on. just look at me.”

“i’m not trying to get my ass beaten tonight.”

he stepped closer, discarding his already used cigarette.

“i beat an asshole up for you. just told you i don’t ever do that. what more proof do you want?”

“i don’t sleep around.” you quickly said, trying to give a meaning to his words. “i know you do that, and i have seen the girls you do it with… and damn, they are beautiful and charismatic and are nothing like what i could ever be like but… maybe this is like a sick goal, or like a prank… the thing is, i’m not trying to disrespect you when i say you may want to hook up, but it’s like the only half-assed explanation i can kind of give to your words right now… and i-“ you got stopped by the sudden feeling of his fingertips on your chin, pushing up.

“you never respond to what i tell you, but you sure do have a lot in your mind. keep going, though. don’t let me stop you.” you just laughed awkwardly, still not looking at his eyes in fear. why did you took everything he said as a threat? you couldn’t believe someone — let alone seongje — would have genuine intentions with you.

“head is in the right angle. just move your eyes up and it will be perfect.” he said teasingly, his fingers still on your chin.

you decided to make it over as quickly as your body allowed you to.

“okay. after this, if you still want to beat me up, please consider that i’m not the best fighter, i have been eating like super bad lately and i’m still a little drunk. also maybe… that you are one of the most known fighters around here? that would be good to consider too, yeah.” at that point, you were just saying random words, trying to prepare yourself for the possible incoming punch into your face. you knew seongje didn’t fight people unless he was either ordered to by baekjin or if it was a challenge. you had seen his face when his opponent was strong enough to fight back: pure ecstasy. so you knew this wouldn’t be fun for him at all in terms of strength, but what if it was entertaining in another twisted way? maybe he had moved on from having fun with good fighters — maybe it was too repetitive now and he had started to enjoy a predator-pray kind of play.

“you are not going to let this go, right?”

“you already know the answer, right?”

in that moment, you just closed your eyes tightly and opened them again, now looking straight at his. how could you be so anxious just from holding eye contact with someone? maybe because that someone was seongje, and you had heard about a million stories of what had happened when someone had dared to stare.

“should i call 911?” he said teasingly, even though your head was empty at that moment, not being able to respond.

you felt stupid — like your dumb teenager self almost. you were 20 now, why was your heart beating from just looking at a man?

“now, tell me. why did you come here tonight?”

“i wanted to drink.”

“but why?”

“i-i don’t know.”

“you do know.”

“i wanted to not think.”

“about?”

“someone?”

in that moment, seongje smirked.

“i know that’s right.” he said simply, letting go of your chin.

you felt like gasping for air, relieved at the loss of his touch. it was giving you crippling anxiety, not knowing if those same fingers would move to your cheek in the form of a punch at any moment.

“that whole speech that you gave me there; about me wanting to fuck you and all that.” he paused, almost amused at your reaction when you heard his choice of words. “you are something else, i swear.”

“i know it’s fucking stupid. thinking THE geum seongje would want that with me.” you said awkwardly while laughing, fearing his reaction.

“i’m not fully denying your claims. but you didn't get all the parts right.”

what was that supposed to even mean? what part was true and which wasn’t? you just kept looking around nervously, still paying attention to the unconscious man on the floor.

“let’s get you a taxi, yeah?”

“what about him?”

“what about him?” he repeated in the same tone as yours.

“are we… just going to leave him there?”

“i’ll be here when he wakes up. he might pass out again when he sees my face, though. but if it makes you happy.” seongje said while shrugging his shoulders.

“s-sure. thank you. i’ll get my own taxi, though.” before you finished your sentence, he was already walking past you, opening an app on his phone.

“your address?”

you didn’t trust him. and he could probably see it in your face, since he passed you his phone immediately.

“just type it in. i won’t look. i’ll delete it after. do you trust me that little?”

“i-i am just a girl who is aware of her own vulnerable situation and how that can make her an easy prey?”

“so aware that a man almost forces himself on you tonight?”

ouch. he got you there. you decided to stop fighting back, just grabbing his phone. you couldn’t help but notice the small contact your fingers made when you did so, and how you lingered there for a second.

“here you go. thank you. you really helped me tonight.” you said while giving him his phone back, smiling lightly while looking down.

“don’t know what came over me neither.” the comment made your heart flutter, knowing now that you weren’t the only one confused by his actions.

when you saw the taxi down the street, you started to panic. you didn’t know how to greet people, but you knew how to say goodbye even less. the anxiety was only even worse after that whole nerve-wracking conversation, which made you have no clear thoughts in that moment.

“i don’t want to see you here ever again. this is not the place for you. if you ever wanna drink, tell me.” your heart jumped again at his sudden words. tell him? about drinking together? you wanted to drink to forget about him in the first place.

“i don’t want to bother you. but thank you.”

“get in the taxi. we’ll talk.” he said while the car stopped, coming to open the door. you just hummed and got in, looking at him for a second before he closed the door.

there, you took your first deep breath of the night, your mind racing with thoughts. thoughts of just him.

days passed. days of him acting like his usual self, and you pretty much doing the same. answering back a bit more. looking up from time to time.

“so you don’t want to drink with me?” you were walking back to the bowling alley again, exhausted. the question woke you up immediately, though.

“what?”

“first word today. that’s what i have to do to get you to talk? be blunt?” he kept smoking his usual cigarette, having the decency to blow the smoke away from your face.

“please, don’t. you are going to give me a heart attack.”

“answer the question.” why was he so persistent? you didn’t even know what to answer. yes, you wanted to spend time with him — the thought alone made your cheeks burn and your stomach turn. but the anxiety that same thought gave you was enough to not even question if you should.

“i-i know you are a busy man.”

“didn’t have you for a liar.”

fuck it. you didn’t think he would give up anyway.

“okay. tonight.” a few seconds passed by, after which he started to laugh hysterically.

your cheeks flushed. you knew it, of course you should have trusted your gut — it was all a sick joke to entertain himself. and you just had to be the most sensitive person on planet earth. your eyes started to get red and veiny, holding in your tears like a champ.

he must have noticed then, since he immediately stopped his track right in front of you.

“i knew you didn’t trust me, but damn. you really do not, like at all.” you just looked down, not really paying attention to him since you were on the verge of a breakdown.

“i’m not playing. i’m laughing at your sudden outburst of confidence, didn’t expect it there. you are just so confusing it’s hilarious.” you looked up for a moment in disbelief. he was looking straight at you, searching for your eyes.

“so? did i fuck it up?” seongje said, starting to walk again. you thanked the gods for that since you were sensing an incoming panic attack triggered by his intense gaze.

you just laughed lightly, trying to play it off.

“i’m just too dramatic. you didn’t fuck anything up.”

“i understand you feel intensely. not the same as dramatic.” perfect, you wanted to cry again. his words hit you like a train, confusing you with his remark. how or when had he even noticed that?

“i-i appreciate that. like a lot.”

“tonight is fine for me. give me your number.” you just stayed silent, lost in your thoughts. was this a good idea? or just your delusions making decisions for you?

“if we are drinking together tonight, you should trust me at least a little more.”

“you know about your own reputation.”

“as far as i know, it doesn’t include being non-consensual with women.”

“it does include dumping them the second you… you know.”

“and you know this is different. i know you know deep down.”

“i-i don’t know.”

“fine. i was going to save you from the experience of having to text first, but i’ll give you my number and you can do whatever you want with it. deal?” seongje said while putting his arm out, expecting you to give him your phone. you thought about it for a few seconds, since you didn’t believe you would have it in you to text first. but having seongje’s phone number sounded like a dream come true. you accepted, passing him your phone.

“here you go. i’ll be waiting for your text.” he said casually while walking into the bowling alley, separating your ways there.

he was a known player and this was you probably falling for it, just like all the other people before.

it was 8 pm. you were sitting down on your bed, wondering if you should say something. if you were going to do it, you had to do it now. what could you lose, though? even if he was just playing, it would be entertaining for you too. you reminded yourself that not everything had to be so serious, but anxiety always won against your true wants and needs. you wouldn’t let it be like that this time, though.

“hey. still up for drinks tonight?” you texted the number he had saved as “geum seongje :)”.

after just a minute, you received a notification. damn, he was fast.

“i’ll pick you up in an hour” your heart jumped out of your chest at his quick reply.

after 45 minutes, you were ready. you didn’t even know why you had put so much effort into your looks. you knew you wouldn’t look much different from the mess you usually were, but you still tried. although you couldn’t understand why.

while waiting, you realized you hadn’t texted him your address, but he didn’t ask neither. even though he told you he would delete it last time, you guessed he probably hadn’t. you would confront him for that later, you thought.

at 8:59 pm, there was a knock on the door. one of your roommates called your name, saying it was for you.

“who is this boy?” she said teasingly, while you walked to the entrance. there, you saw him — dressed casually but put together. you couldn’t lie to yourself: he looked extremely handsome.

“shut up. i’ll come back later.”

“sure, sure. later.” your roommate said while winking at you. you closed the door right behind you, rolling your eyes.

“sorry for that. they are not used to someone asking for me. even less if it’s a man.”

“i enjoyed it. it’s funny how awkward you get.” his comment made you blush, which only made him be even more right.

“awkward? me?”

“you are the most awkward person i’ve ever met. i like it a lot, though.” should you take that as a compliment?

“thanks, i guess?”

“you are welcome. get in.” he said while pointing at his car. you didn’t even know he had one.

“you drive? wow.” you said in a shocked expression.

“did i impress you? i’m fluttered.” he said while getting into the car. “i do everything differently with you, but it doesn’t seem to faze you at all.” you just looked confused, not knowing exactly what he meant. you always were surprised at his kindness, since you had only heard he was the opposite of the person you had met.

“i do appreciate… this. everything. anyone talking to me feels like a gift sent from the gods lately.”

“i don’t want you to say anyone.”

“mmh?” you muttered, confused. he started the car and began driving, not answering back. “by the way, where are we going?”

“special bar for you. one that isn’t a shithole like the club from the other night.”

the other night. the thought only made you sick to your stomach with anxiety. you hadn’t talked about the whole situation again. “mmh? why are you fidgeting so much? because i mentioned that night?” how did he read you so well? or were you that obvious? he was driving, so he could only see you from his peripheral sight. still, he nailed your ongoing emotional state. you decided to be honest, since you had realized in those past few weeks that excuses didn’t work with seongje.

“it was just… so overwhelming. i had never talked to you like that. or looked at you like that. and then you told me i could call you for a drink and that was… unexpected to say the least. but i get really giddy when i think about it so it’s not only anxiety.”

“do you remember the things you said? because they were quite… interesting.” you blushed, even though you didn’t exactly know what he meant. you talked way too much for your liking, and you still were tipsy, so not every part was fully clear in your mind.

“delight me. i’ll drink after so i can bear with the embarrassment now.”

“it’s not embarrassing. it’s more like you gave me a peek of what you really think of yourself.”

“so it is extremely embarrassing. great.” you said sarcastically, letting a small laugh out.

“we’ll talk about it after a drink or too so you don’t feel so embarrassed. come on, we are here.” he said while finishing parking his car.

the bar was pretty, almost elegant. it wasn’t too much, but it definitely wasn’t like the club from last time neither. you both sat down at the bar counter and seongje ordered for the two of you.

“how do you know what i like?”

“trust me. i know my drinks.”

the drinks came and he was right, you liked it a lot. so you ordered another one. and then another one. the conversation was casual, similar to the ones you usually had: he told you about the things he had done that week at the union and the people he had had to fight, and you listened. he spoke so clearly, not slurring his words at all, but you were already in another dimension, still paying him attention, but with other thoughts in mind too. like how handsome he looked. or how much you liked the fact that it was a little loud, so that he had to get closer from time to time for you to hear. you were smiling unconsciously, cheeks flushed at your own thoughts and the alcohol in your body.

“you aren’t listening anymore, mmh?”

“i am. i swear i am. you fought that… that guy… you know.”

“yeah, that guy.” he said while smiling lightly. you loved it when he smirked.

“why do you look so normal anyway? you have had as many drinks as me.”

“i am feeling tipsy. but i can control it way better than you, it seems.”

“can you blame me? you were right, you are really good at choosing drinks. and at fighting. and at many things, it seems.”

“even when you are drunk, you still aren’t capable of looking at me, huh?” he suddenly said, looking a bit lost in his own thoughts too.

“w-what?”

“i mean… we are in like a fucking… date. and you still can’t look at me. when i’ve told you you can.”

“date?! is this a date?”

“don’t fucking change the topic” he said while adjusting his glasses. he looked a bit annoyed for a moment, almost impatient.

“why do you care so much about me looking at you?” you quickly said, getting a bit defensive too.

“because i want you to trust me. and i want to see you, i wanna look into your eyes. is that too fucking much to ask for, mmh?”

“maybe it is.” you simply said, getting too overwhelmed. you didn’t like people looking straight at you. you felt small and vulnerable, and you didn’t want him to see too much. you didn’t want him to stop whatever you two had going on, but your brain had made you believe that could happen at any second if you quit hiding.

“is this about what you said the other night?”

“i told you. i don’t remember.”

“i will remind you then. you basically said that just the thought of me wanting to… sleep with you, okay? was disrespectful, to me. you said it like it was a fucking sin for me to want you.”

“oh… that.”

“you said you were nothing like someone i could potentially fuck. basically.”

in that moment, you couldn’t hold your laugh in.

“why is that such a problem, seongje? i stand by my statement, anyway. and i also don’t get how that has to do with me not looking at you, or anything really.” you said his name, which you never did. but you were getting annoyed, since deep down you understood the point he was trying to make — and deep down, you knew he was right too.

“i think you are an insecure mess. that’s all.”

you stayed silent. he was always so blunt you thought you had got used to it. but you weren’t prepared for hearing him — or anyone really — say that.

“i-i am going to go to the bathroom.”

“fuck, wait. i didn’t mean-“

“it’s okay. i just need a moment.” you got up from your seat and left to the bathroom. you knew he was right, and maybe the alcohol didn’t let him say it in the most caring way, but he was still reading you too well. which only made your tears come out faster. you tried to compose yourself, splashing a little water around your neck before going back there.

“i think i’m ready to go home.” you said as soon as you were next to him again.

“i’ll get you home. but let me smoke one first, yeah?”

“yeah, sure.”

you got out of the bar and turned the corner. an alleyway half dimmed waited there, in which seongje started to light his cigarette. after a few minutes of silence, just hearing him blowing smoke, he suddenly spoke.

“i know this won’t fix anything, but i can’t leave tonight without saying it.” he looked lost in thought again, staring straight at the wall right in front of him. you just waited in silence, expecting anything and everything really. seongje could be just like a pandora box sometimes.

“this whole night i have had to restrain myself not to get closer, feel you or even kiss you. i don’t want to scare you away. not with that, and fuck… even less with what i say.”

you looked up in surprise again. it seemed like he had a special talent to make you do so. seongje looked like he was waiting for an answer, still staying silent with a lost gaze.

“i-i don’t get you.” you couldn’t get many words out of your mouth. you were shocked and you truly didn’t understand him. you didn’t understand if this was some kind of sudden, weird want, if he craved trying something new in bed, maybe. you knew you looked like someone who didn’t have much experience at anything, just surviving for these past few years. he could have noticed, since it wasn’t that difficult to see and he was really observant. once again, you couldn’t find many other explanations for his words and actions.

he suddenly laughed while moving his head from side to side. you could see how he was holding his cigarette tighter and the way his jaw clenched. you could sense that he was mad.

“you are impossible. fuck… i don’t even know why i’m trying.”

after a few seconds of you staying silent again, he discarded his cigarette and started walking. “let’s get you home.” he sounded cold, just like everyone had said he was. you walked a few meters behind him, holding your tears in. you knew you were a mess, you were fucking it up. you had had a crush on seongje for so long and now he was saying he wanted to get closer, but you were reacting like that? you were aware of how insecure and anxious you were, but not to this level.

“wait, seongje. i’m sorry.”

“come on.”

“please, let’s talk.”

“then fucking talk. do you think this is easy for me? you think i’ve done this before?” he said while turning around, finally looking at you. you locked eyes with him, which you had only done in a few occasions, but this time it broke your heart. you hated being the cause of someone’s anger, let alone seongje’s.

“d-don’t get mad. i don’t want you to be angry.”

“i’m not mad. i’m fucking disappointed.”

that was even worse. way worse, in fact. tears started to spill out, not being able to hold them anymore. he was always so honest, you knew everything he said he truly meant it.

“don’t… don’t fucking do that.” he said while starting to walk towards you, stopping right in front of your own feet. “just tell me what you think about what i said.”

“i think you are not… reflecting on this enough.”

“you really fucking think i have just decided to say it? that i haven’t wondered for nights about a way of doing it without getting this exact same reaction from you?!”

his words seemed to knock all of the air out of your lungs. for the first time, you kept looking at him, needing to see how he really felt, what he meant with his words. “i have never, fucking never, done this before, okay?”

“done what? flirt with a girl?”

“fuck it, you won’t get it unless i say it straight, huh?”

“you know… you know i’m not used to this!”

“fucking confess to someone! fuck!”

you were gasping for air at that point. were you understanding him right?

“y-you mean…”

“yeah, it means i like you, dumbass. that is what i’ve been trying to get you to infer for the whole night. but even when i tell you directly, you seem not to get it.”

geum seongje liked you. your brain was telling you to not trust him, reminding you you were not enough for him, or anyone really. but the excitement in your heart won for a moment, which got you to speak without thinking.

“you said… you said you wanted to kiss me.”

“really badly.”

“then do it.”

“are you…?”

“i am sure. i warn you though, i haven’t done this in like years so it’s probably like super bad, nothing compared to what you-“

you suddenly felt his lips crash on yours, moving slowly, but getting faster as seconds passed. he held the back of your head to steady you, not letting you pull away, almost scared that you would do so. he felt warm, which made you forget about everything else for a moment, just him in your mind. you were sure you weren’t doing it right, but you were willing to practice with him. after what felt like an eternity but also mere milliseconds at once, he pulled away while panting, resting his forehead over yours.

“you are looking at me now, huh?” seongje said while smiling teasingly.

“don't make me regret this." his smile just kept growing bigger, his cheeks as flushed as yours.

"you won't. ever."

[murderbot-moodboard]

*cracks knuckles* Okay, I am taking a break from moving prep to talk about Murderbot Episode 10, because it demands to be talked about. Only about half of the episode went how I expected it to, but I loved the whole thing.

- Ayda "Madam President" Mensah is in fine form, taking on corporates and news media alike with dignity and determination that refuses to be intimidated. Basically, she's badass and I adore her.

- I thought it was interesting how the Preservation team all contributed to the discussion with the company reps, in a way that reflected their equal standing in the decision making.

- Love that Pin-Lee is hitting the company with a massive lawsuit! Also love "So you're the fucker we have to deal with." "Yes. I am that fucker."

- I spent the first little bit of the episode wondering if Murderbot was faking being controlled or not, but the way it reacted to things gradually convinced me everything was happening as it seemed to be. I think this was probably intentional on the part of the writers, and theirs and everyone else's creative decisions worked well in making the suspense and the mental journey effective.

(Adding a readmore because this is a long post)

- Ratthi's absence from the meeting wasn't explained, but I suspect it might be because he and/or the others recognized he can't avoid getting upset and possibly disrupting the conversation as they bargain with the company for Murderbot's life. Running up to try and talk to Murderbot while it's clearly on duty is also endearingly in character for him.

- Okay, let's talk about Gurathin. There's so very much going on here that I'm still digesting (and I may come back with more thoughts after I rewatch the series start to finish with my friends in Portland who I've been hyping the show to). But I'm going to talk through the things that have stood out to me so far.

In this episode, Gurathin is the only one who has a chance of rescuing Murderbot's personality and self from erasure (basically death). But no one is forcing him to do it. In fact, in order to save Murderbot, he has to voluntarily revisit parts of his old life that are closely tied to his past and his addiction—something he's been afraid of even getting close to in previous episodes. (The only reason he's in the Corporation Rim at all is because he wants to protect Mensah, the person he is deeply in love with.)

Saving Murderbot goes a step further: he has to reconnect with his old dealer and put himself in a situation where he could so easily choose to relapse. He has to face his fears, his trauma, and his lack of trust that he'll come through for himself when it counts. But what motivates him to finally step up and face those fears? The fact that Murderbot, who's been a corporate slave in even more acute ways than Gurathin was, itself stepped up and went to great lengths to save him, Mensah, and the whole team, even if that meant Murderbot would have to die. (And it outsmarted Gurathin and the rest of them in the process, making independent decisions that have convinced Gurathin once and for all that Murderbot is a person.)

And Gurathin does it; he doesn't relapse, and he comes through for himself, the team, and Murderbot. This is a big step in his trauma recovery, and he's never going to be quite the same after this, in a good way.

We've been saying throughout the season that Gurathin has been unable to see that he and Murderbot are basically the same. Now, he's finally gotten to that point (and who knows what exactly he might have seen or absorbed from downloading all ot Murderbot's memories?). But painfully, it happens right as Murderbot decides it needs to leave. Gurathin is excited to finally have someone he can relate to and connect with in a lot of ways he can't with Preservationers, but Murderbot's not ready for that yet. And damn, thinking about it from that perspective really adds to the angst. Time to pause for a breathing-through-the-emotions break! 🥲

- Whoo, okay, we're back. Let's talk about Murderbot again. This whole episode brings back into stark relief just how much Murderbot is not treated like a person. The company reps' comparing it to a tent, the way the techs treat it, the way the protestors try to destroy it when it malfunctions, and of course, the way its memory is considered lifeless data and its body nothing more than scrap material for the next SecUnit.

Preservation Aux, however, recognize its personhood and go out of their way to treat it like a person, and when contrasted with how the corporates treat it, we can clearly see why meeting and bonding with PresAux was such a life changing experience for Murderbot. The only problem is, PresAux are still assuming that Murderbot wants and needs what they would want and need—what Gurathin wanted and needed. Murderbot isn't one of them, and it doesn't need their help to find a new place for itself in the world as a rogue SecUnit. It's never been allowed to choose its own fate before, and it needs to exercise its freedom to do that. I really related to the sense that Murderbot was processing everything too hard to talk much, and PresAux—completely well meaning—kept talking and filling in the blanks of the conversation without realizing that Murderbot might not feel the same way. And to be fair to them, they can't know for sure what Murderbot is feeling when it doesn't communicate that with them; but to be fair to Murderbot, it didn't seem to even occur to PresAux that there were other options for Murderbot's future that it might want to take. That revelation followed the theme of the book and was executed well. And wow, the moment when Murderbot left, and when Mensah was watching it go as it called her "my favorite human"— perfection, 10/10, no notes.

- Something from this episode that may be relevant in the future: the memory of Murderbot killing its former clients is encoded in its organic memory, because it's still present even when its machine memory has been wiped. This might have been implied earlier, in the fact that this is a memory fragment that survived the previous memory wipe. But I'm not sure it was officially confirmed that the memory is a part of Murderbot's physical organic parts. And the moment when Murderbot found Ratthi's face in a "database match" even before it had its digital memory back seems to hint that we'll be learning more about the nature of Murderbot's organic vs machine memory in the next season, which would follow the plot of the books.

Wow, that was an emotional journey! And it occurred to me the other day that my year-plus of optimism about the show was proven right—to the extent that it was a thoughtful and creatively satisfying adaptation of the books that stayed true to their themes and spirit, and I loved it, a significant number of other Murderbot fans loved it, and many people who've never read the books also loved it. (I'm personally taking note of this as proof that having hope for good outcomes whenever possible is an approach I want to continue to practice.) And I think the next season, with an existing fan base and so many talented creatives on the team, will be as good as or better than season one. Either way, I'm so very excited about it. 💜

Well, I'm off to do some more cleaning and packing. Until later, friends!

[dream-thief-forever-amen]

Desire Ep 2-3 Musings

In which I am won over to the omegaverse world via a slinky demon shark and a long suffering handsome sensual secretary.

Okay full disclosure, I am obsessed with this manipulative Enigma shark in Desire. The plotline of the noble, poor innocent winning over the player rich boy is so cliche and overdone. However - the plotline of a demon shark PRETENDING to be a noble, poor innocent to win over a player rich boy is GOLD.

This very lesbian-coded CEO is being played like a fiddle and it’s hysterical! He’s getting all his buttons pushed and is all flustered and horny and pissed off and enamored and we’re all smugly watching knowing that this player is getting played. I can’t quite feel sorry for him, either, which makes it even more fun to root for the villain. And shark boy is truly terrifying - I have a feeling there isn’t much he’s not capable of doing to get what he wants.

The casting director deserves an award. Eliot Huang was born to play demon shark Hua Yong! He’s gorgeous and slinky and nailing this dual role of the burdened sweet virgin and the devious seductress to perfection.

Demon shark is feeding me delicious plot, while Secretary Gao is just feeding my hormones.

I’m a sucker for self destructive, suffer in silence types. Plus Secretary Gao is just a sensual disaster of a man. I mean look at this poster…

He’s all wet and soft and handsome. Why there isn’t a line of men and women outside his door waiting to plant him into a mattress I will never fathom.

I’ve started reading the novel and this is a very faithful adaptation so far. Clearly everyone involved respects the vision of the source material. I’m trying not to read too far ahead cause I don’t want to lose my anticipation for the upcoming episodes.

From the web novel cover it looks like somehow they’re going to pull a happy ending out of this insane story. I’m enjoying speculating how this hardcore emotional and sexual manipulation is going to turn into genuine romance… could you ever trust someone like shark boy once you know what he’s capable of? I dunno, maybe trust is overrated. People believe in all kinds of irrational things without a hint of evidence so it makes sense affairs of the heart would be the same.

Hua Yong may be an orchid to everyone in the book, but he’s a demon shark to me.

I hope he murders some people. Something beyond the pale so there’s no easy way to say “ooo but he had his reasons.” There’s something very appealing about presenting a villainous character as the genuine love interest you’re supposed to root for. It isn’t done very often. I hope they don’t make any excuses for him. I hope he’s just a manipulative crazy bastard because he can be. Cause the more villainous he is the more I’m going to enjoy the story - including the subsequent romance.

We can have real romance with Secretary Gao and his petty CEO - but let’s leave the main couple in toxic hell together please.

[miserywrittes]

*:･First Kiss With The WindBreaker Boys*:･

Wc: about 2.5K Note: you already know the wbk brainrot won once again!! This was actually really fun to write. It felt like I could really dive into their characters and see this from their perspective. Also, I bet you TOTALLY can't tell who my favorite windbreaker character is. It's totally not obvious by how much i wrote:3   *choji, nirei and sugishita I couldn't really envision them for this scenario while i was writing these so sadly. HOWEVER, I'm willing to make a part two of this if people want them!!*

༻Sakura༺ Hesitate, sudden, gentle 

Sakura has a hard time with romance, everyone knows that. It was obvious he never had his first kiss yet. However, you never rushed him once, nor did you ever initiate to kiss him first. Sakura was becoming a little anxious about not kissing you yet since the boys have been asking him about it. Not pressuring him, but just being friends and wanting to know how his relationship with you was going. 

After school he decided to head over to your school so he could walk you home, like he almost always does. You come out of the school, and you immediately spot him. It's kinda hard not to. You pick up your pace a little excited to see him. As you two start walking home and talking about mundane things, he reaches for your pinky. Sakura interlocks it with yours. 

He stops walking and turns to face you. You look down at your interlocked pinkies, and then back up at him. He looks at you nervously. You could tell there was something racing through his brain. He suddenly  leans in and your eyes widen of course. He takes notice of that and freezes a few centimeters from your lips.

 You notice what he's trying to do and you giggle softly. You smile at him, and close your eyes and lean in too. It takes him a few milliseconds to respond, a short amount of hesitation. Then, he leans in and kisses you quite gently. You never knew a kiss could be so soft and gentle. He just kinda stands there, and doesn't know where to put his hands. He's a little nervous about making you uncomfortable so he doesn't kiss you for long or move his hand from your intertwined pinkies. The kiss only lasted about 2 seconds, but for him it felt like an eternity. 

After it he pulls back and looks into your eyes. You could see His own just glowing for a brief second, until he turned away. Heat was rising to his face quickly, and he put his forearm over his face a little to hide it (it didn't work).

༻Kiryu༺ Smooth, effortless, soft

Kiryu’s a smooth man and he never fails to handle everything he does without grace. If effortless was a person it would be him, and that's exactly how your first kiss went. He was listening to you talk about something that interested you. He swears he was listening, but his gaze kept slowly drifting towards your lips that were shining with gloss. His favorite that he's seen on you so far. 

He was daydreaming about you. You catch him drifting off into whatever land he is in, and you wave your hand in front of his face. “Helloooo~, you're not even listening to me!” Kiryu snaps out of his little dream world and looks back up to your eyes. He didn't say anything… he looked at you for a few more moments. 

He  then slowly moved his hand to touch your cheek. He looked into your eyes for a moment as your worlds started to come to a halt. His eyes were soft but full of want, and all you could do was give a little nod of consent. He leaned in and kissed you. It was smooth, you fell into a rhythm immediately. You didn't have to do any work, it just felt, you know right. After a few seconds he gently pulls away, and looks into your eyes. 

His eyes filled with love and contentment. His hand still on your cheek, he softly rubbed your cheek with his thumb in a soothing motion. You both stayed there for a little bit, enjoying the moment. Smiles both plastered on your faces. 

Heat spreads throughout your face, not cuz your embarrassed, but just cuz it was such a warm and intimate moment for you two. (And maybe it was because you were taken aback a little by the suddenness and just how right it felt.) He notices it but doesnt mention it. He mentally takes a picture of this moment in his mind. Cuz wow the blush on your cheeks, the gloss (thats now smudged) on your lips and your wide eyes all together were just breathtakingly gorgeous to him.

༻Suo༺ Polite, swift, loving

Suo and you have been dating for a little bit now. You've noticed how polite and gentleman-like he is. You appreciate it, and think it compliments him quite well. Like the gentleman he is, he takes you out on one of your dream dates. 

It wasn't anything huge or expensive, just something you've always wanted. A picnic date. You're getting the last bits ready by packing the food you've made into this cute strawberry themed basket you got a long time ago. As you finish packing the last pieces of food the doorbell rings. You close the basket's lid and quickly head over to the door. You open it and see Suo standing there with his usual warm smile on his face. You welcome him into the home, and you tell him to make himself comfortable. 

He just ends up following you into the kitchen and watching you do your thing though. As he watches you put the finishing touches on packing everything that you needed he just gets this overwhelming feeling of love for you. The way you looked in this moment was absolutely perfect in his eyes. He calmly walks up to you, hugs you from behind and smiles as he looks down at you. Suo was drinking in the sight of you. He was just absolutely enamored by you. 

He leans in close “May I kiss you”, his whispers ever so faintly. You nod with blush starting to dust your cheeks. He tilts your head up and kisses you in one swift motion. It lasts only a few moments. He pulls away and it leaves you breathless, wanting more. He tenderly caresses your jaw, looking at you with pure love in his eyes. Neither of you moved, wanting the moment to last for forever. A bubble of just you two, and all the love that would come with it. All you knew in that moment that you caught the most respectful and loving man out there. Truly what a man.

༻Kaji༺ Timid but strong

Kaji never wants his own hardships he faces with his anger to ever be put onto you. Not ever has he been remotely rude, mean or aggressive to you. He's been stern and has had some outbursts, but overall in your relationship he has been really loving, in his own way.

Kaji never really has been one to initiate affection in the relationship because he is terrified of making you uncomfortable. You've initiated everything so far, but a kiss. Not like he's begging for a kiss (he totally is), however, he's wondering why over these past few months you never asked for one. 

He takes out a lollipop from the pocket of his pants, unwrapped it, stuffs the wrapper into his pocket and then pops it into his mouth. Afterwards, Kaji puts on his headphones, turns on his music, and heads out. He immediately headed over to your place after school. He HAD to ask you why. 

You come home and you see an extra pair of shoes in the doorway. You knew exactly who was here. A smile creeps up onto your face. You take off your shoes, head on over to your bedroom, open the door to see the blonde boy sitting on your bed. However, he doesn't look like his normal self… He looks almost perturbed? You set all your stuff down onto the floor, walk over to your bed and join him on it. You didn't even get to ask him what's wrong before he suddenly spoke out, not loud tho. “Why haven't we kissed yet?” You almost want to chuckle due to the expression he has on his face. 

It's like a shy kid talking to his first crush, it's cute. You explain that you’ve just been so happy with the relationship so far that you haven't felt the need to initiate it just yet. He looks over to you, still timid, but his words are straightforward. “Well I want one.” A calm loving smile grows on your lips. 

You put your hand on his cheek to make his face towards you. You lean in for the kiss and he reciprocates. He started off not taking the lead but a few seconds passed. Kaji wanted more, his feelings of love became strong. He wasn't aggressive about the kiss, it was just very firm. He wanted to say “I love you, more than anything” with the kiss, and he conveyed just that.

༻Umemiya༺ Perfect

All you needed was one word to describe your first kiss with umemiya. Perfect. Well almost everything about that man was perfect in your eyes, but wow that first kiss you two shared just immediately made you fall even harder for him. 

You told him back then you wanted to take it slow since it was your first ever relationship, and of course the gentleman that he is obliged. He never pushed you to do anything, constantly telling him that it's ok to just grab your hand, and he always was ok with the word no. He never looked dejected, sad or upset whenever you said you weren't ready for something. 

It was about 6 months into your relationship, and Umemiya took you to the beach for a date. It was mid summer so there was no school for either of you, and no curfew. He held your hand as you both walked along the shoreline as the sunset. It was beautiful. The sound of the seagulls, crashing of the waves, wind hitting your ears and the feeling of the sand beneath your toes. It was a surreal moment for you. 

You reached the end of the shoreline of the beach. The sun was almost completely set, and Umemiya spotted a pretty large rock. He suggested you two sit on it and finish watching the sunset. Of course you agree, and he helps you up onto the rock. After a few moments of getting settled, you two were holding hands, sitting shoulder to shoulder and legs dangling off the rock. 

He turns towards in the very last moments of the sun going down. He turned your head to him ever so gently with his fingertips on your chin, leaned in and looked right into your eyes. Umemiya was giving you an out if you wanted, but there was no way you were gonna deny this kiss. You keep your eyes on his and don't back away. He takes that as he’s been given the ok to go ahead. He leans in quickly and kisses you gingerly. The light slowly fading away as you two kissed. If anyone else was watching it would've looked like this was straight out of a movie. That's how perfect it was.

༻Togame༺ Slow, warm and breathtaking 

Togame is just a pretty down to earth dude, and going with the flow of life. He was never in a rush, and he even showed that in your relationship. He let you set the pace of how fast you wanted to move. That didn't mean he didn't care though. He made sure to make it known that he loves you. 

You were home alone due to your parents going out for the weekend. They tried to tell you details, but you didn't want to imagine them on a date… or what all of that could entail. So you call your boyfriend, Togame. He picks up the call, and you hear his smooth deep voice talking nonchalantly like usual. “Hey!... What's up babe?, you ok?” You smile, he's so sweet. He always asks if you're ok when you call him first. 

He gets nervous that someone from another gang has done something to you. He makes it pretty clear to others what would happen if they do, but still.

You answer him and tell him you are all good, and that there's nothing to worry about. You explain the situation to him. After a few seconds he answers you, tells you to just come on over, and that the door will be unlocked. You both say your goodbyes to each other.

You pack a few clothes, and some extra that are his that don't smell like him anymore, and other essentials. After a little bit of a walk, about 15 minutes, you arrive at his doorstep. You open the door, take off your shoes, and head straight to his room. It seemed like no one was home for him too, but that was pretty common in his house. 

You open the door and he was just laying on his bed in a big hoodie and sweatpants, his normal at home clothes. He looks up from his phone and throws you a smile. He pats his bed signaling for you to join him on the bed. You set your bag down on the floor near the foot of his bed. You plop down onto his pretty big bed, and lay right on top of him

He pulls you in close and wraps his large frame around you. You guys just lay there, on your phones, relaxing. After an hour or so he looks over at you, taking in the sight of you in comfy clothes (his hoodie and sweatpants ofc), relaxed and happy. It made him feel so much love for you. He was honestly getting cuteness aggression from the sight.

He leaned over and kissed the top of your head. You looked up at him and smiled fondly. You leaned in, just wanting to be closer, but he took it as that you wanted a kiss.

He adjusted his position, and leaned in as he held your jaw carefully with his left hand. His left hand rested on your hip. The top part of his body kind of hovering over you. He looked into your eyes, flickering to your lips. He leaned in so slowly it was killing you with anticipation. You know you weren't going in for a kiss, but you didn't mind. He looked really handsome caught up in the moment, so you didn't mind. 

After what felt like forever he fully leaned in and kissed you. It was slow, filled with warmth and love. You immediately melted into it putting a hand on his chest to feel his heartbeat, which was racing also. 

After a minute he pulled away and slowly opened his eyes to look down at you. This kiss left you breathless. It wasn't anything crazy, but just how he kissed you felt like he knocked the air out of you. It was exhilarating. He gives you a lazy smile and lays back down. He snuggles in closer to you, practically smothering you at this point. You loved it though. It felt like a huge teddy bear was hugging you.

☠︎︎do not repost any of my works without my permission. miserywrittes©☠︎︎ ↻ ◁ | masterlist | ▷ ↺

[thefountainn]

'Cause I don't wanna be in love with another, even in another life

!The banner and dividers were made by me with pictures from Pinterest!

Noah Sebastian x fem!reader

TW: fluff, angst(?), insecurities, comfort, my grammar probably, let me know if I forgot anything

Disclaimer: This story is pure fiction made up by me. While the main character - Noah Sebastian is inspired by a real person, none of his actions here are relevant to how he acts or what he does in real life.

A/N: This fic is inspired by a line in the song 'Heavy' by The Marias. I know what the song is about and I know it's sad but I really liked that line and decided to write a cute little fic about Noah. I don't mean to disrespect the band nor the song by any means whatsoever. Anyways, I hope this isn't too bad and that you enjoy :)

You and Noah have been dating for a few months. Not too long but you've never felt better or happier.

He was truly everything you could ask for. He was nice and respectful to you, never overlooked your boundaries, taking his time you. He was caring and thoughtful, always making sure that you're okay.

He always knew when something was up and tried his best to make you feel better. Even if you told him you were fine, because you didn't want to worry him, he always knew and took care of you.

You were watching weird movies and playing video games together. Talking about your hypefixations. Even when he wasn't sure what exactly you were talking about, he would always listen.

Whenever you needed him, the second you called or texted him, he was instantly on his way, ready to drop everything for you.

He was there whenever you needed a shoulder to cry. He was making you smile until you cheeks hurt and making you laugh until tears were running down your face.

Your relationship wasn't public, yet he never said no, when you asked him to hold your hand, because he knew that it calms you down.

You loved and cherished the quiet nights when you were cuddling watching some random anime or listening to music. Or cooking together. Or really doing anything together, because spending time with him was one of your favorite things (if not your favorite).

He was your favorite person for sure though. And you loved him, but you were afraid to admit it to him. Afraid that you'll scare him away or make him feel weird, like you're rushing too much.

Noah had a hard time expressing his emotions and was always so self-critical, it hurt you to look at him sometimes, because in your eyes, he was perfect. Sadly, to him, things appeared different.

He loved you as well and even if he'd never said it, it was more than obvious by the way he treated you and most importantly by the way he looked at you. His eyes were saying everything. He was looking at you with pure adoration, like you were an angel sent from heaven.

In fact, you were his angel and he appreciated everything you did for him. Being there, comforting him, and always understanding. He was happy that you didn't rush him into making your relationship public, or moving out together, or anything like that. Instead, you were going at a slow pace, comfortable for both of you, taking your time with everything.

Noah would never admit it, but every time you wrapped your arms around him from the back, when he would least expect it. Or when you woke him up by covering his face in gentle kisses. Or whenever you called him just because you missed him or saw something that reminded you of him, he felt like crying from happiness.

This also goes for everytime you remember a small detail about him or asked him a question that had something to do with any of his interests, listening to his rambles with the biggest smile on your face. Buying him small things that he either needed or you thought he would like.

It took him a while to get used to it and to feel comfortable enough to talk more freely about his emotions, but you were patient and waited for him. And the fact that he was this comfortable with you, made you feel all warm and fuzzy inside.

Everything was going well, amazing even. You were giving each other everything you needed and both of you were happier than ever.

Or at least so you thought. Because one day, Noah wasn't answering any of your texts. 'He must be busy or tired' you thought and didn't think much of it.

When he didn't answer you the next day either, you got worried, because he had never done that before. Not only was he not answering, but he wasn't seeing your messages at all. So you decided to call him, just to make sure he's okay.

He didn't pick up the phone.

You waited a few more hours for him to text or call you back, then a few more hours, and by the time you knew it, it was already the next day. And still nothing.

All kinds of thoughts were going through your head. Was he okay? Did you do something? Did you hurt him? Was he mad at you? Most importantly, was he okay?

Thankfully, Noah had roommates. One of them was also one of his best friends and bandmates – Jolly. Who you became friends with shortly after Noah introduced you, so you decided to text him and see what's going on.

You: hey sorry to bother you but Noah hasn't spoken to me in 3 days and I'm worried. is he okay?

Jolly: I don't know, Y/N. He's been locked in his room, haven't really came out of there in a while.

You: well shit. that's not good. mind if I stop by to see him?

Jolly: Not at all. Please do actually because I'm starting to get worried as well.

The second that you read Jolly's text, you grabbed your car keys and made your way out. It took you about 20 minutes to get there and you were practically running towards the front door.

You didn't bother knocking or anything, you were coming to that place pretty often so you were pretty much past that at this point and now you were in a hurry anyway.

Jolly was in the living room and was a bit startled when you burst through the door. You said hi to each other, but you didn't waste any time on small talk and made your way to Noah's bedroom.

You stayed in front of his door for a few seconds, listening for any sign he was in there. Nothing. It was quiet. You knocked on the door. No answer. You knocked again, louder this time.

"Go away!" Said a quiet voice from inside. Noah.

"Baby, it's me!" You said, waiting for a response, but you didn't get one, so you spoke up again. "Can I please come in?"

"Okay." He said after a few seconds of silence, but this was all you really needed to instantly open the door and emerge in the room, your heart racing in your rib cage.

There he was. Noah was there, lying in his bed, wrapped up in blankets. No music was playing, nothing on the TV, he wasn't on his phone, reading a book, or doing anything at all. He was just staring into nothing. He looked tired and sad.

The view broke your heart. What happened to him? What caused that? You didn't dare move at first, staying still with your back against the now closed door behind you. You took a deep breath and started walking slowly towards him.

"Hey," You spoke softly, but Noah didn't respond. He didn't even look at you. You got closer to him, taking a seat at the foot of his bed. "What's wrong bub?"

He didn't answer, but after a few seconds of silence you heard quiet sobs, that Noah was so desperately trying to stop by burying his face into his pillow.

You instantly went to kneel by the side of the bed, where his head was. You debated it first but then decided to place one of your hands on his shoulder.

"Hey, it's okay." That was all that came to mind, you couldn't think of what else to say. You didn't want to ask him questions yet, since that seemed to be what had upset him. Instead, you reached your hand further and started rubbing slow circles against his back. "You're okay. I'm here for you."

"But why?" He asked, his voice strained, groggy and so quiet, you almost missed what he said. He didn't dare look up and kept his face on the pillow instead.

"What do you mean why?" You asked, confused by his question.

"Why are you here?" He clarified. He wasn't annoyed that you were there. No, there was something much deeper in his voice. He was genuine with his question, which made your heart shatter into pieces.

"Because I care about you and I was worried. I wanted to make sure you're okay." Simply explained as your hand moved to crease his head.

"But why do you care? Why are you with me?" He asked, sounding a little frustrated, and lifted his head slightly to look at you. His eyes were red and puffy, his cheeks glistening with tears that were running down.

At this point, you were holding back your own tears. Poor thing. If you could steal all of his pain and anxiety, and experience it instead of him, so he could never feel that way again, you would. You would do that any day without a second thought.

"Because I like everything about you." You whispered without hesitation, as if it were the most obvious thing.

"Why would you though? Why me? You could be with anyone you want, so why me?" He asked as more tears started streaming down his face.

Despite all the compliments Noah was getting every day, by all kinds of people, not only for his talent but also for his looks and personality, for being so down to earth, despite his popularity, he still criticized himself and felt undeserving of love at times.

"Oh, Noah." You got up and sat on the bed, placing your hand on his cheek, wiping off some of his tears. "Why wouldn't I be with you is the question. It's so so difficult not to like you. I mean, you're everything I could ever dream about."

He blinked at you, trying to process what you were saying. You saw his face twist in a grimace of pain as he maneuvered his body and laid his head on your lap, his arms wrapped around you as best as they could, as he went into a fit of sobs again.

You held him close, creasing his hair and back. Whispering that everything is okay, that you're there for him, that you wouldn't leave him and why you were still with him, even though to you these things were more than obvious. He needed to hear all of that.

Once he calmed down, he sat up and finally looked at you properly. There was a frown on his face and his cheeks were red. You grabbed his face in your hands and wiped the remaining tears. He was looking at you with glossy eyes but at least his breathing had gone back to normal.

"Okay," You whispered. "...now that you've calmed down a little bit, will you tell me what's wrong. Or what can I do to make you feel better?" He looked at you like he wanted to say something but no words were coming out of his mouth. "Anything, really." You reassured him, thinking that he just didn't want to bother you.

He stayed quiet, just looking at you with those pretty but glossy eyes. He really had the prettiest eyes you've ever seen but seeing them all red from crying was tearing your heart.

"Why did you ask me why I am with you? Did I do something wrong? Was I who made you feel bad?" You asked as panic started settling in you, when you remembered his question from earlier.

"No, no, you didn't do anything wrong. It's just..." He moved his face from your hands because he couldn't look at you any longer. Instead, he was looking up at the ceiling. "I just...I don't know. It feels wrong." He mumbled.

"What feels wrong?" You were starting to get really concerned.

"Everything." He answered and took his face into his hands. To that, your heart dropped. You really did do something to hurt him and he didn't like you anymore. Your mind was racing trying to remember every interaction with him for the past month, thinking of what could've gone wrong.

Last time you saw Noah, he came over to your place, you had a cozy night in, ordered take out and watched a movie. Then you watched a few episodes of his favorite anime...well didn't really watch it because you were too busy making out on your couch but anyways. After that you had a bath together and went to bed, falling asleep cuddled. The next morning you made breakfast together and after that Noah went home.

Nothing went wrong, everything was literally perfect, so that made you panic even more. He probably just realized that he doesn't like you and doesn't want to be with you anymore. Your stomach dropped. Thinking about it felt like a punch in the gut.

"What do you mean, Noah?" You managed to ask, trying to hold back tears.

"I mean...it feels weird that you want to be with me. Like you're so nice to me, I feel like I don't deserve you." He was now looking down, once again not meeting your eyes. His voice was quiet at first and became a whisper by the end of the sentence.

"Oh my God, baby. Why would you say that!? Look at me." You reached out to hold his hands in yours and he forced himself to look at you. "Please don't think for a second that I would want to or even think about being with someone else, okay?"

"Really?" He asked as if he was in disbelief, but what was underneath the soft tone of his voice, was the need for validation.

"Yeah, really. And love every second I spend with you and wouldn't trade that for anything..." You smiled softly and pulled him close to you so your foreheads were touching. "...'Cause I don't wanna be in love with another, even in another life."

You then pressed your lips to his as you both completely melted into a soft kiss, that said more than a million words.

"I love you." You whispered once you pulled away from each other's lips, your foreheads still pressed together. That's when you realized what you had just said and started panicking all over again. You didn't want to rush things and you didn't mean for this to slip out but it felt right in the moment.

"You do? You really do? Like- like you actually mean it?" Noah said in a quick breath, making you chuckle.

"I love you." You repeated confidently. You felt like the best way to reassure him that you actually meant it is by saying it again.

The second the words rolled out of your tongue, Noah grabbed your face in his hands and kissed you deeply, as if to show you how thankful he is for you.

"I love you." He whispered against your lips.

"So I didn't do anything to make you sad?" Your voice was quiet and calm, despite all of the emotions and scary thoughts you still couldn't get rid of.

"No." He chuckled, giving you a peck on the side of your mouth.

"And you don't hate me..."

"Of course not!" Another kiss, this time to the other side of your mouth.

"And you don't want to break up?" Noah laughed at your question, throwing his head back a bit.

"Oh my God, Y/N! What are you talking about!?"

"Ha! How does it feel to have a taste of your own medicine!?" You both just laughed, as he wrapped his arms around you, laying you both down on his bed. You stayed silent for a while, just cuddling.

"But seriously, you really scared me." You whispered into his neck.

"I know, I'm sorry. I let all these thoughts make me paranoid and I acted like a dick."

"It's okay, just talk to me next time. I promise to tell you if anything's wrong, just remember that to me you're perfect and I love you."

"Shit," He pressed a kiss on top of your head. "...you really are too good for me." He chuckled

"Noah Sebastian Davis." You sat up to look at him as if you were about to scold him. "I swear to fucking God..." You didn't get to finish your sentence because he started tickling you and both of you got into a fit of laughter.

[nightwonder7]

Does Nortalice, to you, have canon potential or is it one of those random ‘oh hey that’s a fun dynamic, why not’ sorta ships to you? What got you into shipping them in the first place, among the millions of other Norton ships out there?

(Like Nortmelly for example, another one of those popular ones; enemies to lovers appeal to people, etc. etc.)

🤔 just purely curious is all, as a fellow shipper myself who enjoys your art and the little headcanons and interactions you make! :)

Thank you for your questions! And I'm happy to hear! ;u;

I was actually surprised that NortAlice managed to catch my attention, as shipping has never really interested me in fandoms. I would occasionally look into canon ships every now and then, but I wouldn't say they got any more attention than other character dynamics.

It wasn't the canon material that got me into the ship, but rather my mutuals (thank you @quoththeowl31 and @mintytealfox <3) that did. And the more I was looking at fanarts and reading people's headcanons and such, the more hooked I got fgdshjfgs And the more hooked I got, the more potential I saw in their dynamic. One is objective, open-minded and brave, yet can let her obsessions get in the way of her own well-being. And the other is cynical, closed off and cautious, yet is steadfast in his endeavors and self-preservation. One is graceful, one is rough. They are both persistent and willing to do what it takes in order to achieve what they want, but their approaches declares another distinct difference between them.

Now, I'd be EXTREMELY surprised if it became canon, as I have a feeling to what direction IDV is going to take. But at the same time, it wouldn't be THAT out there, in my opinion. But I may also be biased pfff So to answer your first question, it is a mix of "I think it looks cute and fun" and "there is potential". I feel fortunate that I get to see them interact in canon, as many ships don't get that (if you don't count official art and essences). Though that could also prove to be a double edged sword. We'll have to see.

I'm not entirely sure why that ship in particular among the thousands that are out there gave me such brain rot. I just really like these characters, I guess. I really like Alice knocking down Norton's walls and coaxing the best parts of him out that he has buried deep within him after a life time in the gutter. I really like Norton learning from Alice that people can be genuine, and being good to others is a viable choice. I really Norton being Alice's rock and support and comfort her when she struggles. I really like Fool's Gold being soft towards Alice, and Alice being soft towards Fool's Gold. I really like them being protective of each other, cuddling up with each other and being cute and silly together.

I just think they're neat.

[wannabedragon-yep-lumenemporium]

Omg this episode was sooo sweet 🥺

As I said multiple times now, this series is making us absolutely love Jerry, what a cutie patootie he was?? And Rick? And Beard Beth? ahaha okay let's go with my take, the episode's themes I noticed and the sus/interesting details.

_________My take (I'm part of the R&M cult, so, impartiality)________

Honestly I was expecting this Jerry to be a total mess, getting our Jerry in real danger quite quickly, instead, this episode was deep and yet silly, sweet and funny.

Jerry change is the most consistent through the show. Jerry is becoming the more consistent character in his arc this season, there is not episodic stuff for him: while Beth, Morty, Summer and Rick seems to orbitate around a "change core", not moving too much close or far from that point, Jerry is evolving in his change. Jerry has completely embraced a new side of himself, and he didn't just accepted it, he is maturing within it, growing more and more self confident each passing episode. He is ready to take the risk of feeling loved and cherished, he is accepting his place in the universe, but not passively: he's not the Jerry that stays in the family because he has nothing better to do with his life, like some filling a role that someone gave to him or just because he likes Beth. He is taking ownership of his life, living it as he likes to, taking the risk,

saying out loud what he thinks, instead of losing himself in fear...

he is learning how to be independent.

I really think this is a metaphor of Jerry finally starting to trust himself.

Would you follow a part of yourself through a multidimensional wardrobe? Probably a healthy answer would be yes, because you know that, somehow, you can get yourself back home. You can look after yourself, you trust yourself.

Mooch is that part of Jerry that saved him so many times: it's the survival core in him that can lead to Jerry Prime...

the same core that can destroy an airplane just to prove a point: a core that needed a more thoughtful and mature Jerry to evolve into grit and ownership over selfishness and cowardice.

And thank to this acceptance and evolution, Jerry is able to kill that part of himself that he dislikes more, basically his own "Rick Prime" (on a very small scale 👌)

Our Jerry matured enough to comfort that part of himself that feels doubtful about his own choices, even when it comes to save his own life...

That frail part of himself too resentful and insecure to accept and to admit love.

He basically gently re parents himself.

I also loved how they explored the Beth second marriage thing, I totally wanted to see this after the Jerryboree episode, bcs I wanted to know what happened to the ex-Jerry in her life.

⬆️(apparently Morty didn't beat that old fart enough last episode)⬆️

Send me on my way - Rusted Root: As Jerry would say, as fate would have it, an Ice Age reference slapped me in the face this episode, just right after reading this moving analysis about the movie a few days ago, analysis that I highly suggest u all to read through and through, especially if the Ice Age was one of your childhood movies. Bcs the Ice Age (at least the first ice age) is a movie about a group of lonely outcasts, just like the Smiths family, that slowly finds a safe space in each other, a safe space where to open up and process their own sh1t, taking ownership of their own lives, instead of passively surviving through trauma, death and danger. I could talk for ages abt this, but uhm, no, I won't💀 I'll just say that it feels so weirdly familiar to find some childhood memory in a 2025 Rick and Morty episode, it's almost like a friend going "Hey, do you remember when in the Ice Age happens this and then blah blah blah..." and you share a piece of heart that you almost forgot about, something that you were both too young to get then, but that it just makes sense now.

I loved the Bag of Holding reference: for those who don't know, that's what a Bag of Holding is, a very cool DnD item, you put basically infinite stuff in it and it's like an inter-dimensional bag

and it scared the shit out of me bcs...

this necessarily implies the Bag Man exists in Rick and Morty reality (a dude that probably once was a person, that got lost into a bag of holding, and legends says sometimes comes out and drags other ppl in the bag with them😭😭) AAAAAHHHHH!!😭 (loool, I looked for a "cry-scared" gif and tumblr asked me if I'm okay and if I need help💀💀💀💀I'm dying 💀💀 how am I gonna tell them that I'm just scared of the Bag Man AHAHAHAHAHAHAH)

Also I love how Jerry gets his family no matter what now, this so funny and cute 💀

In conclusion I cannot think of a better season my dudes, each episode is better than the previous one, and now we'll see Morty with his son... I though we basically had two options with that episode synopsis:

Morty reconnecting with Planetina (but I thought Morty didn't change much since their breakup) or Morty reconnecting with Morty Jr. (but I thought he was already dead). And boom, they dropped it, it was Morty Jr. (this is going to be heartbreaking I guessbafsgdahfh yayyy ✌️💀)

I like how the closer the show gets to the beNinnig of a new cycle, the more unresolved plot points from sooo many series ago, come to an end.

________________Ep. Main themes in a nutshell_________________

Taking real ownership of our lives, means to gentle re parent the most frail sides of ourselves, fighting (aggressively 💀) those attachment issues that would isolate ourselves from those we really love.

Accepting yourself is of course the recurring theme here, but there's a specific something that is starting to emerge: neither Rick nor Morty accepted themselves yet. Rick kills every version of himself on sight and has no contact at all with his good side, like Doofus Rick. Morty does basically the same and the only Mortys who could truly teach him something about life (Evil Morty, Arcade Morty) are evil to him, and he would likely shoot them than having an open conversation with them 💀

__________________Sus stuff/interesting details___________________

Pick me up with Golden Hands. It's peculiar that they chose to highlight this line from the song, bcs it immediately reminded me of The One True Morty Golden Hand: there was a specific quote about "his golden arm reaching for those who believe" or smth like that, but I cannot find it anywhere 😭😭😭😭 anyway even in pocket Mortys, the Grand Sage of the Cult is "touched by the golden hand of The One True Morty", so there's a reference to the One True Self here I think, like: "grab the hands of your true self and embrace who you are so you can find your way" kind of thing.

It's nice to see how much Morty and Jerry have in common: this version of Jerry has the slicked back hair and the same leather jacket of this pocket Morty, Greaser Morty, they're both rebels and little shits.

Also, how cute was Rick??

All done!

Thank you for reading my stuff!

[manager-daylight]

Glitch just posted news about TADC episode 6~

(383 word analysis under the “view post” button)

I’m not even going to this event (the tickets are sold out plus the event is in the West Coast of the country and I live in the East Coast) but seeing this post still gave me a sudden feeling of hyper-excitement!!! The convention is from July 24th to July 27th, which means that we could potentially be receiving the trailer for episode 6 as early as July 25th. However, we don’t know whether episode 6 of TADC will be coming out before or after episode 2 of Gaslight District, especially since Glitch posted a Gaslight District teaser yesterday. If the next episode of Gaslight District comes before the next episode of TADC, we certainly will not be receiving the trailer for episode 6 on July 25th. However, if TADC episode 6 is coming before Gaslight District episode 2, it is possible that we could get the full episode as early as August. Once I see someone post a video of the episode 6 sneak peak online, I will definitely make a post analyzing that :)

Now I do find it interesting that these specific four characters were chosen, especially with episode 6 being another Jax-Ragatha shared episode and both of their voice actors being there but Pomni’s voice actor is not there even though she is the main character of the series. This suggests to me that Caine, Jax, Raggie, and Gangle will play a more important role in episode 6 than Pomni. Don’t forget as well that Goose said that episode 5 was “the silly before the storm” and that Jax would do something so bad that “only the strong Jax fans will survive”. The thing about episode 6 being “the storm” seems to suggest that someone will abstract in episode 6 (though I have no proof of whether that assumption is true). The most concerning thing about all this is that Raggie & Gangle are by the far the two most likely characters for Jax to be the cause of their abstraction and the voice actors of those two characters will be at this event. I don’t want him to cause them to abstract please don’t do this to me Goose… I don’t know what would traumatize me more, seeing Gangle & Raggie abstract or seeing Jax feel like it was his fault…

Oh and here’s image from the post uncropped:

Sorry if this was long, if you read the whole thing I just want to say thank you because I am really appreciative of that :)

[rottedraptor]

yappertron coming through.

okay, so, as much as I’m genuinely so excited for this arc and how it’ll play out, the way they’re handling Puzzles and WPNZ’s characters both intrigue me and confuse me. Let’s start with Puzzles.

-

Up until now, Puzzles is known for being a manipulative and self absorbed guy who doesn’t exactly care about others. The ending of the newest episode ‘A VERY unlikely friendship.’ though adds something new onto his character.

He looks almost sad, like he’s having a second thought on something. It almost feels like Puzzles is having doubts on this entire plan and might be wanting to call it quits. Meggy mentions in the phone call that she’s only helping him out because Leggy still believes in him, this clearly gets to Puzzles as he looks at his makeshift Leggy plush with a sad look.

I feel like now being aware that there’s someone who believes he can be better, someone who wants him to be better and is willing to help him, it’s making him have his doubts about going through with his plan. If he’s actually thinking about stopping this whole thing, I wonder how it’ll play out with Toomp and WPNZ.

Now, let’s move onto WPNZ.

-

In this same exact video, WPNZ has this small moment where he admits he’s genuinely proud of all his kids, seemingly a bit saddened about the fall out with his family from SOTC.

I find this scene incredibly interesting because this implies that WPNZ has some sort of care about those kids, but he just cannot understand how be an actual parent and understand that he went too hard on them. There’s also that moment in the last episode ‘PrisonVision’ where he looks to be hesitant on erasing his memories of his family when Puzzles offers that.

Now, does he really regret all his actions? We’ll have to figure that out with later videos depending on what they’ll do, but i feel like they’re hinting at WPNZ having certain regrets about what happened in SOTC. with these little emotional moments.

I honestly feel like WPNZ does care about them a little bit, but he has no idea how to be a proper parent to them, he doesn’t know what a father should do. His idea of parenting was most likely teaching them to be like him, deadly assassins. He just can’t get it through his head that you aren’t supposed to teach children that, especially pushing them into a dangerous mission they clearly aren’t ready for.

-

Being clear here that I DO NOT think these two need a speedy redemption at all. Do I think redemption is possible? Yes, I do think that there’s a very slim chance that they could change, especially with these small implications they’ve been putting in recent videos.

I just would prefer it if they did it slowly, showing these characters improve over time and not immediately fix them. Puzzles and WPNZ are both flawed characters, and I mean EXTREMELY FLAWED, so if they do make the decision to reform these characters, they cannot rush that.

-

Honestly? I think Toomp is the big bad of this arc here. Puzzles and WPNZ are good threats, sure, but I’m getting the feeling that Toomp is a lot more of a bigger problem than he’s letting on. Think about it.

He’s JUST gotten introduced last video and we know that he’s extremely dangerous to the point where they had to create a NEW NUMBER for all the crimes he’s committed, and he’s also described as a walking weapon, similar to WPNZ. In the most recent episode we see more of Toomp.

He has a specific interest in WPNZ (he doesn’t have a good relationship with Puzzles at all.) as he stares at him, tries to sneak up on him twice, and eventually drags him off into a building, at night, in the junkyard and fixes him. But what weirded me out is that Toomp used a gear made from his own body and infused it into WPNZ. Im getting the feeling that it’ll affect WPNZ in some way, like what if Toomp can control him through that? What if he makes him more powerful / unstable than he already is? Theres a bunch of possibilities and none of them seem like really good outcomes. I think Toomp has his own agenda, it’s just a matter of when he is going to start it.

-

If you’ve made it here, thanks for reading my little post! This is all just speculation so I could very well be proven wrong with later videos. ^_^

[mitocamdria]

Carmy is a serial plotter

So I wanted to do this post to serve as a sort of compilation of proof that Carmy puts serious thought into his plans to spend time or hoard the possessions of the people he romantically desires. This theory is so fascinating to me because it adds another intriguing layer of personality to the tormented and talented chef we all have come to love. To layout the evidence I’ll break it down by season.

Season 1:

I think we actually get the first sign that Carmy plots when he texts Syd before opening Mikey’s letter. After he states his behavior was not ok, he tells Syd that her check is ready for her to come get whenever.

Now please correct me if I’m wrong, but isn’t it more customary that a final check be mailed to a former employee, especially if the employee and employer are not in the most cordial of relationships, which at that time they were very much not. Or Carmy could have asked if Syd would like to come in to retrieve the check or have it mailed. But no, Carmy specifically says she needs to come to the restaurant to get it. I think this was Carmy’s way of ensuring he could see her at least one last time to try and convince her to come back, even before they found the tomato can money (that money certainly helped his plan).

Season 2:

One of the first metas that came about suggesting that Carmy formulates plans in lieu of just communicating his feelings is from @fairestbeard and can be read here. It brilliantly lays out how Carmy is the one whom purposefully messed up the lacto ferment he and Syd were working on in order to be able to make the suggestion that they essentially go on a food tour date which Carmy failed to do previously in front of the lockers at The Bear. There’s also evidence that Carmy purposefully moved his Chef coat to his kitchen where he knew Syd was going to be which eventually led to him gifting her the Thom Browne Chef coat.

Season 3:

Ever Dinner

So I think there may already be meta written about this but I can’t find a specific post about it so definitely let me know of any existing meta.

Carmy made a plan to ask Syd to the Ever Funersl dinner ahead of time, indicated by the fact that Carmy awkwardly starts the conversation with “We’re closed tomorrow night” seemingly in the hopes to steer the conversation towards the Ever dinner. Once he realizes he has an opening he makes an obviously pensive expression and then shoots his shot.

Syd’s Scrunchie

There’s been a lot of speculation that the scrunchie Carmy has on his dresser is Sydney’s. Sydney is the only character to consistently wear scrunchies when she’s not working in the restaurant. So therefore I think Carmy had to have taken it one of the times she was in his apartment. Or maybe Syd had one in the restaurant lying around somewhere accessible to Carmy.

This theory is really interesting because it would be easy enough for Camry to just give the scrunchie back to Sydney if he innocently came across it but the fact that he’s hoarding it shows that he is holding onto it because he loves her deeply.

Season 4:

Now this season is where the plotting gets heavy. @freedelusionshere was one of if not the first to come up with the idea that it was Carmy that took Syd’s cleaver (post here) and @hamachibloodmagic reblogged with photo evidence that Syd indeed used her cleaver around Carmy shortly before it went missing (reblog here).

@thoughtfulchaos773’s meta detailing how Carmy lies is explored in great detail here and also provides evidence that Carmy hoarded Claire’s green sweater which also serves as proof that Carmy probably took Syd’s cleaver.

I find it hilarious that when Sydney tells Carmy she lost her cleaver, instead of offering help to find it (which would be the normal and expected response), Carmy immediately asks her if she needs a new cleaver. CARMY BE PLOTTING. It’s definitely implied Carmy is going to engage in another grand gift giving gesture towards Syd, because that is what Carmy does when he realizes he can actually provide something Sydney wants or needs, like with the chef coat. Only this time, Carmy TAKES the object so that he can replace it, probably with one that is high end or with significant sentimental value.

Significance

What does all of this prove? Carmy is very aware of his feelings for Syd. There has still been some speculation within this community as to whether or not Carmy is aware that he is deeply in love with Syd and the fact that Carmy plots in order to get closer to her is evidence he does these things intentionally.

He even so much as calls himself a “psycho” when he is stuck in the walk in and questions why he ever thought he could be in a relationship. On surface level, none of Carmy’s actions up to that point would be any that anyone would call psychopathic. Which leads me to believe he is very much aware that he plots and I think that is the psycho behavior to which he is referring. And due this realization, Carmy deflects and sabotages his plans because he believes he is unworthy of Syd’s love.

Perhaps the cherry on top to these revelations is that it only proves further that Carmy and Sydney are soulmates. Because we all know this story starts with Sydney’s plot to come and work for the chef who made the best meal of her life and lies to Carmy about why she’s there. These two are so afraid of open communication that they rely on elaborate plans they’ve made in order to get closer to the other. If that’s not soulmatism, I don’t know what is.