#i could be proven wrong but it Does feel at least a little significant to me that we haven't seen Jessica taking Anything in the new comics

[brittlebutch]

the only thing i don't like about 'Alex should have asked for help' AUs/theories is that they all seem to have the base assumption that we actually Know Anything about The Operator, and the fact of the matter is that we simply Don't.

[inawickedlittletown]

Sooo I started to read other articles. I didn't after reading the ones that came out right after the episode that justifiably got everyone upset.

This one from tv insider had Tim saying this:

Moving on to Buck and Tommy’s breakup, talk about your approach to it. Why was Tommy sure that Buck would break his heart?

Tommy’s older and Buck is very new to this, and whether Tommy was correct or not, I think what he felt like was exactly what he said: I’m not your last, I’m your first, which is a special thing to be, but as Tommy says, it doesn’t usually end up being the same thing. And I think based on what we know of Buck, he’s maybe not wrong. Buck’s a little impulsive when he’s feeling a certain kind of way. He’s like, move on in, bring your couch. So I just think because Tommy’s a little older and wiser or maybe at some level he feels like he doesn’t deserve Buck, I don’t know. But I think he accurately diagnosed Buck. Buck’s still figuring himself out, and boy, that would be quite risky to move in with that guy as much as you would love to.

That does seem to be Buck’s go-to, which isn’t the best.

Exactly.

Are we going to see Buck single for a significant period of time now? Is he trying to figure out what he wants really out of a relationship?

Yeah, I think that’s right. As Tommy said, you’re still figuring yourself out, and his options have increased by 50 percent of the population. So knowing Buck, that’s going to be choice overload. He’s got to navigate that with a little self-awareness.

--

So they definitely planned for this. That's what this reads like...they wanted to break them up so that they could send Buck through a period of exploration. Tim says everything Oliver said here in much nicer terms. His view of Buck is so...Idk, it's like he sees Buck as a kid that still doesn't know what he wants. And he decided to put that view right into Tommy's head too. It's a little jarring I guess but this show...has it ever been consistent?

What sucks is that 8x05 was written like they were doing so well. And then right off the back with 8x06 we have warning signs in the date scene with the girl that approaches Buck and how Tommy sort of shrugs off Buck checking her out. I really do wonder where hot waiter fit into this and I'm so glad we didn't see Tommy like checking hot waiter out or something. But I guess that scene was there to sow the seeds. We have Buck spiraling because of the Abby thing and we have Tommy maybe not realizing but reinforcing for himself that he's a stepping stone for Buck and being okay with it in the status quo.

The way that Tim speaks about Buck asking Tommy to move in, he makes it seem like Buck is just barreling in without thought...like if they went through with it Tommy might be proven right. But then what is the point of the scene with Josh where Buck is right on the cusp of an "I love you" just to then be like no actually Tommy knows how this ends and he can read Buck and knows they're not forever. But Tommy is not a mind reader.

Where there is hope is in that Tim doesn't outwardly say anything about Tommy being gone for good. As someone else pointed out the Lou interviews were done by buddie journalists with a bias so there is a question to how much that colored what we got and why they were so determined to close the door fully. Also...why did we get exit interviews in the first place for a character that only had three episodes...it's so odd.

The writers made a point of leaving this open. Do I think we'll get Tommy back any time soon. No. But after the doom and gloom and the time to mourn this a bit I want to be positive and there is really no knowing. Tim says he thinks Buck will be single for a while...okay fine...picture that being the rest of this season.

Buck won't just jump into another relationship...and Oliver gets his Buck slut era 2.0...what if S9 brings back Tommy? What if this is the long game...or at least the thing they can have in their back pocket if Lou is available later on to come back. But that's not something they can promise or that they can commit to and Lou isn't on contract clearly and Oliver wouldn't know if that's the plan...hell even Tim probably doesn't know if they'll do that. Or I'm giving him too much credit because as we've seen this season storylines have been rushed to close up at breakneck speeds so it would be an anomaly for him to prolong something like this.

All this to say, showing the network and Tim that bucktommy matters to a lot of people and that Tommy matters...it may just make a difference.

[professionalranter31]

So I mentioned in a previous post how Overwatch has a lot of factions that aren’t expanded upon a lot, so I’ve got a list of my top five that are currently represented and my top five that I wish got representation

We’ll start with the ones that currently have representation

Number five is Oasis, represented by Moira who is their Minister of Genetics however we do know in lore that there are other ministers so they could be playable in the future or someone else who works within Oasis

In the same vein as Oasis at Number four we got the Atlantic Arcology which is represented by Lifeweaver. It’s a similar place to Oasis where many great minds live in order to try and further research in various fields and I just feel like both of them should have more representation given the significance they most likely have with advancements in the Overwatch Universe

Number Three is Blackwatch, we only know of four of them and one them also doubles as representation for Overwatch. I want to know more about the black ops of Overwatch, like, did they have a tank?

Number two is the MEKA Squad, with what we know of them in lore is surprisingly little and I’m gonna be honest the vibes I’ve gotten from the lore is that D.Va does most of the work and I want to be proven wrong about that. Plus, the Genshin are meant to be this big threat but it’s hard to take it as a threat when we are only able to see the capabilities of one of Korea’s defenders

And at Number One, the Inti Tribe because why the absolute FUCK is Illari labeled as its only defender!? No seriously, she is fucking 18 why is she treated in lore as her tribe’s only defender. If she was their tribe’s only sun warrior that’s a different thing but she’s working with others to defend their tribe but the Sun Warriors made up the bulk of the defenses so at least then it still gives to the tragedy of her explosion while not leaving the literal eighteen year old as the only defender of an entire giant tribe I want an explanation Blizzard!!! I will crawl into your office like a demon possessed and tear through whatever lore books you have in there to find my answers give them to me!!!

On to the factions that don’t have representation within Overwatch that I feel should have it

At Number five we got the Hashimoto. They’re meant to Kiriko’s main enemy and as of the recent Hanzo short story his as well but they just feel like a dime a dozen goons from what we have seen. Like how Null Sector began to feel like more of a threat after Ramattra was added I feel like the Hashimoto would be seen as more dangerous if we actually got a hero to represent them

At Number Four, the Gwishin. Sort of the same story like with the Hashimoto except we do have some idea of what they are capable of, no what I want a hero to represent them for is how they happened in the first place and how they are able to adapt like they do

At Number three the Wastelanders of Australia, they’re the outcasts of the junkers and what Junker Queen used to be when she was exiled. It shows a new perspective on the Australian Wasteland that’s different from the Junkers

At Number two we got the UN. Look, given how big of a deal the UN is in the larger story of Overwatch I just feel like having a hero to represent them would be pretty good in terms of lore and generally either a character who is morally grey or a villain

At Number one we have the God AI. We currently know the names of four God AI, Anubis, Chernobog, Xibalba, and Macaria. Given the massive importance the God AI have in the lore of Overwatch I’m genuinely surprised that not one of them has been made into a playable hero. I’m also kinda impressed that Blizzard hasn’t released a hero that is just them taking a god from mythology and translating that into an FPS. Anyway, given the various purposes the AI had there’s plenty of ways to design their kits around it and there have been hints that some of the God AI achieved some level of Sentience such as Chernobog’s lore. So yeah, I want them represented in game

[sunshinechay]

Okay so I was musing about it in the tags of @respectthepetty’s post here but I also want to make a tiny post about it.

It’s only the second episode but does anyone else get the feeling that a significant portion of the show is going to end up coming down to Mew vs Boston?

A truly colossal showdown in which they are going to destroy each other and irreparably damage everyone around them?

As RTP pointed out, both use sex as a means to control. Both have a thing for Top and want him for themselves, but (and I’m might be projecting here) it also feels like it’s going to be about more than that. It’s going to be about Ray and his feelings for Mew. Chuem and her attempts (sometimes half heartedly) to get everyone to get along. It’s going to be about Boston’s inability to recognize his own faults and his belief that he’s better than everyone else. It’s going to be about Mew’s feelings of surperiority towards Boston (and even Ray and Chuem to a certain extent). I even think how Boston is using Nick is going to come into play as well, I’m just not sure how yet.

I posted about it yesterday that this friend group doesn’t really feel like a friend group and a big part of the reason I feel that way has to do with Boston’s barely veiled resentment/animosity towards Mew and Mew’s smugness right back at him. Each thinks they’re better than the other and (imo) both are wrong.

And even to connect it to the post I made about the projector light and Mew’s mugshot from ep1. I’m starting to think Boston got left out of the light because he is the closest thing this series is going to have a bad guy. I mean this show clearly is not going to actually have one, but I think Boston is going to end up filling the antagonist role because the show seems to be more from Mew’s POV than Boston’s. Ray and (Chuem) are partially in the light of the projector to symbolize their more innocent status (again, not true innocence because they have their own issues, but closer to innocence in the battle of wills between Boston and Mew).

They’re going to explode at each other and probably sooner than we think. It’s going to be mutually assured destruction and they’re going to take at least Top down with them. Likely Ray and Chuem and maybe even Sand down as well. I’m not going to even speculate what’s going to happen to Nick because it’s going to be bad, probably almost as bad as (if not worse than) Top.

These are messy imperfect characters who are going to say and do terrible things, both to themselves and each other. They are each the “bad guy” in each other’s story and even in their own to a certain extent. Neither of them are really better than the other and both are going to end up down a rabbit hole they can’t get out of.

I could be very wrong and I might be jumping the gun a little too much but after two episode, this is what it’s starting to feel like to me. I’m not trying to say one is better than the other or that they shouldn’t do what they’re about to do. This is just the sense I get. I’m completely open to being proven wrong. Hell this whole conflict could end up being a red herring before the “real” conflict emerges.

I would love a showdown between Boston and Mew though on any scale. Neo and Book would eat it up and put out an amazing performance. Only time will tell I guess haha.

[maeamian]

Hi hi I stumbled across ur tags in that one tumblr post about atoms and I loved ur response!! I also had a question related 2 it. My knowledge of chemistry and atoms is very surface level (dropped out of my environmental sciences major after 2 years lol) so forgive me if this sounds a lil silly. But I thought atoms could touch? Like when they form bonds their electron clouds can overlap right? The cloud is part of the atom so they are touching I would think, even if the nuclei wouldn’t be. Or are those models inaccurate and the electron clouds don’t actually overlap, is that just a simplification for diagram purposes when teaching bonds? Ik you said we don’t know for certain about anything! Atoms are crazy weird but I was curious what the accepted opinion is on this! Ty u seem very very cool

Great questions, my background's mostly coming from the physics side of things and is a little rusty, but I've got enough mutuals who will yell at me in the replies if I get anything seriously wrong here.

That said, generally when physicists tell you 'things don't actually touch' what they mean is a) roughly speaking the 'surface' of all normal things are made of that electron cloud you're talking about, b) when things 'touch' those electrons get (obviously) very close to each other but still have a distance between them, because c) the Pauli Exclusion Principle, one of the basic underlying things that defines basically all of chemistry says that multiple electrons can't be in the same quantum state. This is all, more or less indisputable fact as proven by the fact that chemistry works and can make extremely accurate predictions about how chemicals will form, something that they could not do without this understanding of the electron as an elementary particle

But! You're also right that a covalent bond does represent an overlap of electron! The distinction between these things is twofold, first, when you, for instance, stand on the floor, the molecules in your shoes aren't bonding to the floor, they're reasonably well bonded to each other, but generally you're not creating new chemical bonds every time you stomp your feet, at least not to any significant degree. Instead what happens is that the electron clouds at both edges get very close to each other and go 'someone's already in here' by sending a blast of photons at each other, although here I have to note that the photons are what's called 'virtual photons' in that they're more mathematical conveniences than anything that gets out further than the local interactions, you couldn't see them because they're absorbed almost as soon as they're emitted to the extent that they have any reality, which they definitely kinda do in that they have observable effects on space when it's either very empty or very small.

The other distinction is that a covalent bond, the sort you're thinking is two atoms sharing one electron, in that case I think it's pretty reasonable to say that the two atoms are, for pretty much all purposes, touching at that point, since they can not be separated without the expenditure of energy to break that bond. The case that scientists are generally talking about when they bust out this Fun Fact at parties is when two electrons try to get near each other at the edge of a shoe and the ground rather than when two atoms bond, so you're right about the thing you're thinking of, but the scientists making this observation are also right about what they're discussing, I think OP of that post made it with the understanding that people would recognize it as being this argument rather than one about bonds, but it requires having been exposed to it before to do that, which not everyone has done! Hope this cleared things up and feel free to tag on any follow ups

[chirpsythismorning]

Filmmaking 101: Directionality in Easy Rider & Stranger Things 4

Whenever I see Stranger Things fans on Reddit, or anywhere for that matter, try to argue that the show has no deeper meaning beyond what's shown at face value, I seriously want to scream into the abyss.

To put into perspective just how wrong they are, picture this:

I'm taking my first ever film class in 10th grade. Within the first couple of days, we were introduced to the very basics. So this is concepts that are integral to film. It's not like this was something mentioned on page 700 in chapter 20... No, this was like the 2nd page of the very first chapter.

This concept we were introduced to, was the directionality of a character/camera movement and how that direction can affect the way a viewer interprets the character(s) and/or the story itself.

Our textbook used an example from the film Easy Rider (1969), and how something as simple as the direction the characters were driving in at the beginning of the film, and even a majority of the film, foreshadowed their ill fate in the end.

Basically, studies done have proven that viewers often associate movements from the left to the right more positively, whereas we often associate movements from the right to the left more negatively.

To understand this better, think about how when you write your name for example, you're very likely to start from the left and go to the right. A lot of us do everyday movements this way without even realizing it (reading is another basic example). This is why our brains often associate movement going from right to left, as negative. (There are of course exceptions to this in the real world! But this is film, where everything is intentional/by design, not natural/by chance.)

At the beginning of Easy Rider, the protagonists start their journey driving from right to left. Although this trend isn't by any means consistent 100% of the time (as that would be nearly impossible, excruciating for everyone involved, and a little too on the nose), it is a vast majority of the time.

A technique like this, used in this way, may cause the viewer to feel unease about what is yet to come without them even realizing it. That's sort of the whole point.

At the end, we see this same technique being presented to us, with the protagonists once again driving from the right to the left, which leads directly to their inevitable, doomed fate.

Now, this doesn't mean that the movement here, from right to left, is what in and of itself doomed these characters. This is just one of many stylistic choices a writer/director can make if they want to hint to the audience what to expect subconsciously, a feeling they want to evoke at the very least, without outright telling us, ie. subtext. And this film embodies this concept of directionality in a way that makes it a perfect example for this specific technique in action.

Does this mean that any and every time a character, car or anything on screen, goes from left to right or vise versa, that there is for certain an intended significance, always? No, not necessarily.

However, if we are seeing something more predominantly than the opposite, then yes, it's very possible there could be some intention there, as these are again, the basics.

I remember learning this, amongst other things and thinking, "That's kind of absurdly stupid... But I... love it." Stuff as random as this is what can make cinema almost poetic. When there's meaning being created and combined, coming from all different directions, in ways that can be noticed, only if one is willing to look 'behind the curtain'.

So, upon coming across others in this fandom, who insist that the most basic of the basics: lighting, music, set-design, costuming, cinematography, etc., has no greater significance than what is outright stated and/or acknowledged, I mean, it's been dreadful tbh.

What makes film so incredible (in my opinion), is that there is almost always intention going into the details, especially when the filmmaker is keeping in mind how it's going to make us, the audience, feel.

Anyone who knows film, and I would argue that the Duffer Brothers, Shawn Levy and a lot of the people involved with Stranger Things, are well versed in the basics, knows about all of this, to the point where I would honestly say they are undoubtedly experts.

They know how to convey meaning beyond just what is outright stated/shown to the viewers, but also through techniques that, yes, may seem absurd to a casual viewer, but is actually the backbone of filmmaking. Like this is filmmaking 101. Literally.

Although I haven't rewatched the entire show since being reminded of this (very basic) technique only recently, I did however rewatch the end of season 4, just to humor this theory of directionality and whether or not the finale followed this formula.

And it did not disappoint.

Knowing what we know about directionality and now watching this scene, I have to say, this scene from 4x09 might be an even better example than Easy Rider when it comes to showing what this technique looks like in action and just how effective it can be.

There very well could be a significance to the shot of people leaving Hawkins: driving from the left to the right = safety/survival vs. the Surfer Boy Pizza van entering Hawkins: driving from the right to the left = danger/death.

What I find interesting, is that this entire scene is showing us right to left, until the very end, when we get El from left to right.

Which reminds me of the literal last shot of season 4, in that I think no matter what it comes down to, El is still going to play a major role.

I think because she's always been the person to fix things every season, is why it won't be as simple as many might predict. But I also don't think having her fail like she did at the end of season 4, means she's just out of commission forever, like a lot of fans also predict.

If anything it probably means that El is going to continue having some doubts going forward, about her abilities and even her self-worth, but ultimately that's what will likely make her comeback that much more important to the overall story, in order for them to defeat Vecna and the upside down once and for all.

Or it could all just be one massive coincidence. I mean after all, I am just a delusional *gunshot*

[classic80sand90smovieloves2]

Helping Billy and Stu on their murder spree would include~

(Not my gif)(Requested by anonymous)

(This might not be exactly what you were expecting but I hope you enjoy it anyways! Sorry it took me longer than expected!)

- Wrong. That was the best way to describe your relationship with Billy and Stu: wrong, fucked up, and dangerous …but you couldn’t deny the fact that it was exciting. 

- You were no saint. That was a fact you’d come to terms with a while ago. You were no saint but you certainly weren’t a killer; at least not when all of this started. No, back then, you were just a really, really bad girlfriend.

- Truth be told: you weren’t single when you’d gotten involved with the boys, though, to be fair, neither were they; not that that made things any better.

- You’d had a boyfriend, a boyfriend you’d once really cared about, but somewhere along the line, you’d begun to have problems and instead of resolving them, you’d both chosen to ignore them and resent each other instead. Which is probably why it was so easy for you to fall into another boys arms; especially when they were as charming as Billy was or as sweet as Stu was.

- You’d always had a bit of a crush on Billy. The two of you’d been acquaintances ever since freshman year and for a while you sort of thought that you and him might get together. But then he started dating Sidney and you got asked out by your boyfriend and you just sort of tried to put the idea out of your head.

- Unbeknownst to you, the idea never left Billy’s head and he found himself plotting all the ways that he could make you his; all while finding out that his partner in crime was seemingly just as interested in you as he was.

- Stu ended up playing a crucial role in your “arrangement”. The two of you found yourselves made into lab partners and thusly, you were invited over to his place after school and later given the perfect excuse to spend time with him; and/or Billy, without causing suspicion.

- The first few times you go over to the Macher place, nothing of value happens. You do exactly what you’re supposed to: work, study, joke around a little and get a bit more comfortable being in each other’s presences. It’s a few study sessions in that you get a curveball thrown at you.

- It’s late one evening, Stu’s parents are out and you’re both studying on his living room floor when all of a sudden the doorbell rings. Stu gets up to answer it and who else would it be but Billy.

- Stu pretends to act surprised and tells the boy that he forgot they were going to hang out and that he’s studying with you. Billy assures him that it’s alright before Stu tells him to wait a second and reappears in the room, saying that he thinks the two of you have studied enough and that Billy’s got some horror movies that the three of you can watch if you’d like to stay and chill. How could you possibly refuse?

- And so, your makeshift friendship with the boys begin; a friendship which very quickly leads into something more once Billy decides the time is right to make a move.

- You obviously don’t expect it the first time it happens but you find yourself wanting more the minute it’s over.

- Sure, sometimes the guilt will kick in when you see Tatum and Sidney or when your boyfriend is being particularly sweet, but it never seems to be enough to stop you from coming over whenever they ask or letting them in whenever they knock on your door.

- But the longer the three of you keep up your affair, the more things you start to notice.

- Billy isn’t stupid. Regardless of how he feels about you, he isn’t going to jeopardize his whole plan by making one wrong move and trusting someone he shouldn’t have. He’ll take his time analyzing you, picking apart your every move and reaction until he’s sure that you’re the one.

- You’ll start to pick up on little things about your boys that some might consider weird: all the horror movies and Billy’s knowledge in them, strange questions, indecipherable looks, things like that.

- As Billy comes closer to making up his mind, more of the mask will slip; though not enough to scare you off or make you think that anything’s really wrong. More odd inquiries, questionable sexual activities, and Billy testing your loyalty; oftentimes by asking you to cover for him or Stu to see how far you’ll go for them.

- You might be asking what I mean by “questionable sexual activities”, well, Billy has, on more than one occasion, demanded that you only watch whatever gory film he’s put on instead of looking at him as he pleasures you. He watches you closely, muttering lowly in your ear about the movie and talking dirty as you lock your eyes on the screen.

- When the boys first confess to you about the murders, you don’t believe them. You think it’s a bad joke but once you see just how serious they are, your smile drops and you say “you’re serious aren’t you?”.

- It definitely takes you a while to get used to the fact, but you find yourself opening up to the idea more and more as Billy explains their motive and butters you up with his charming words.

- Your involvement starts with little things: patching them up when they’re hurt, analyzing horror movies, giving them ideas or intel and telling them what won’t work.

- Stu likes to bump your shoulder or ruffle your hair and call you smart whenever you offer up good advice. Billy is much more subtle in his praise but his reactions are usually the ones that make you want to help them more and more.

- The blonde enthusiastically recounts stories of their slayings to you, jumping around the room and making a bunch of noises and hand movements while he does so.

- The first time you mention that you’d like to help them “...more”, both their faces break out into shit eating grins. They don’t immediately hand you a mask, knife, and mission but they do start to ask more of you.

- Helping them hide evidence, giving them alibis, waiting outside of their crime scenes for them and helping them lure people right into their traps all becomes second nature to you.

- Then comes your initiation. 

- There’d always been some jealousy involved in your relationship; mainly on their parts. You had a boyfriend and they had girlfriends which meant all three of you had to; at some point, act all lovey dovey with your partners in front of the others, if only to keep up a façade. 

- But, as obvious as it was that none of you particularly cared for your significant others, that didn’t stop Billy or Stu from absolutely hating your boyfriends guts. This hatred would eventually play a key role in solidifying your role in their lives.

- Your parents aren’t home and you’re in your bedroom with the boys, doing exactly what one would assume you’d be doing, except, unlike all the other times you’d done “this”, your bedroom door swung open and revealed a very unexpected visitor: your boyfriend. 

- Maybe it was the pent up jealousy or the fear of his plan potentially being ruined or maybe it was a little bit of both but when the boy immediately began to just book it towards your front door, Billy followed after him. 

- By the time you make it out into the hall, Stu has him held in place and Billy is turning to look at you, telling you to “come on” as they walk the boy into your kitchen. 

- Once you get there, Billy pulls a knife from the block and walks up to you, telling you that you said you wanted to be a part of things and that now's your chance.

“Go on.” He says, nodding his head back towards the boy who Stu’s restraining and watching you closely as you slowly take the knife from his hands. Stu’s grinning excitedly as you approach him, cheering you on while Billy remains silent behind you. 

- The blonde whoops and hollers as you cut into the boy, audibly expressing his pride in you, and when you turn to look back at Billy, he’s got a tiny little smile pulling at his lips, showing that you’ve just proven yourself and done exactly what he wanted. 

- The brunette locks eyes with you before he walks up and wraps his arms around you, pulling you back against his chest and tilting your head down to look at the boy who’s currently bleeding out on your kitchen floor. ���Would you look at that.” He says and you can hear the smile in his voice as he says it, his hand trailing up to grope at your chest as he stares down at the gory sight before you.

- There’s no going back after that. You’re now officially one of them and get your very own father death costume. 

- It’s perfect really. More hands, more confusion for the police, more bloody sex.  

- Billy gets turned on by the sight of blood and the adrenaline that he feels after a kill; and Stu has never been one to turn down sex, so don’t be surprised if you end up pressed against the floorboards of a victims house or thrown on one of their beds the minute the three of you get back to their house. 

- You and Billy tend to make the plans while Stu just goes along with whatever you say. 

- Helping them get Neil Prescott.

- Going along with Stu while Billy talks on the phone. 

- The two of them both baby and yell at you. They tend to do most of the dirty work because they think you can’t handle it but at the same time they; namely Billy, will get angry if you mess anything up in the slightest. The brunette will yell or insult you because he’s a control freak and wants everything to go exactly as he planned. 

- On the drive/walk home, you’ll stay quiet, wondering if maybe you’ve made a very severe mistake when deciding to be with the boys. But then Billy will grab your arm and pull you into a kiss, asking if you’re alright and apologizing so sweetly and for better or for worse, you’ll fall right back in again. 

[coolbeesbro]

Hey did you hear that there going to be a Luca short on Nov. 12th?

I did and I feel like this big ol jumble of mixed emotions over it. This is gonna probably be a lot more of an answer to this than you expected, so sorry about this in advance, but I have a LOT to say about it so strap in!

First and foremost, don't get me wrong, I am SO excited at the prospect of more Luca content coming our way, but at the same time it worries me after how hard Disney's been denying that Luca was an LGBT+ film (or could be).

One can argue that Luca, at the very least, is a damn good allegory for being part of the LGBT+ community in a bigoted town. And it would make sense to push that further for Luca and Alberto having something more there; after all, being outed as a sea monster isn't just a struggle Luca is facing alone. It's both him and Alberto walking that line to stay hidden. It's a struggle they both face together. Then there's the threat Luca faces of being sent away to The Deep "for his own good" because his parents worry for his safety and would rather hide him away than let him be who he is as a person for fear that he'll get hate-crimed. Then there's the fact Alberto was abandoned by his father, "I'm just the kid that ruins everything." leaving him waiting on the island alone in hopes that his father would change his mind and come back for him. Then there's the outing scene we get, with Luca shouting Sea Monster and pointing at Alberto so he could keep himself hidden and safe. (theres so much more pointing towards them being gay, but this is already going to be absurdly long so I'll cut it here).

Despite there being so many things pointing towards that relationship between Luca and Alberto, here's why the short we're getting has me feeling a little bit antsy.

This goes a lot more into the MO of Disney as a whole, since their main focus is always in profit first. It's not necessarily about the idea that American/European audiences wouldn't buy products and support a film with LGBT+ themes. It has more to do with their popularity in China. Disney has a very large market there, and it would be a significant impact in how well a film does in the eyes of Disney (they don't necessarily care about views, more so how much money they can make off the movie/tv show/etc). So if the movie/show gets censored and pulled out of China, there goes a lot of their profit.

Lets hop over to some advertisements we've all seen on the Luca Official Instagram account, because it would be dumb to overlook the rainbow text and video edits. That was absolutely a marketing scheme on Disney's behalf aimed at selling more products to the LGBT+ community, because it's just subtle enough to keep us interested without raising any red flags over in China. Once more, Disney only cares about selling product, and if that means giving us the illusion of making something cannon without actually going through with it they will. It absolutely kills me because deep down I wish there was something more to it than that (and god I'm ready and willing to be proven wrong about this I really am) but there just isn't.

Even if the short itself has no luberto content, my fear is that they'll push for one of them getting in a het relationship (weather it be Luca and Giulia, Luca and some other girl, or Alberto and some other girl) as a way of "damage control" to point away from the possibility of Luca and Alberto being gay in cannon. Luca as a whole has been a very successful movie in Disney's eyes, and the potential for that to crash and burn in China's market is a big factor here.

I would love nothing more than to get more underdogs content with like, a reunion between Luca, Giulia and Alberto at the start of their next summer. I think that could be really sweet and would be a perfect little addition to the movie. And there's a very good chance that's probably what we're getting here, but that small smidgen of doubt that Disney would push for a more heterosexual narrative with this makes me uncomfortable.

Growing up, I had next to nothing as far as representation in the media and had to turn to fannon content to get any form of inclusion. It makes me so happy to see younger people now getting the representation they deserve (like with Steven Universe, Adventure Time, The Owl House, Kipo and so much more). And in that regard, it makes me sad that we would get so close, and then have it get ripped from our hands. It's frustrating and feels like a few steps back.

Anyways, sorry, I know that was defiantly a lot more than you were asking for, but I needed to explain myself so it didn't come across as me being nervous over nothing. Whatever happens will happen, so we'll see when we get there. Regardless, I'll still stick to the content I'm creating for the fandom because if Disney clowns on us, at lease there's still the fannon to rely on.

[damn-stark]

My fault

Reiner Braun x reader

Requested by @rxvxr “i was wondering if you could do a reiner x fem!reader where they’re “enemies” but both have secret feelings for each other, and one day the reader gets really badly hurt by one of the other scouts and tries to hide it, but Reiner notices and asks “who did this to you?” and he’s like so unbelievably furious and she doesn’t think he would care and he just gets really angry at himself for not noticing her injury earlier and is like SO protective? sorry it’s so specific i’m just in a mood. thank you🥺🥰”

Warning- talks of blood and injury, fluff and swearing

———-

“Shit,” you hiss, “shit.” You roll down your pant leg over your bleeding wound and try to hide the fact that you had been hurt during the fight. There were more significant things to worry about instead of wounds you sustained while you had been a little reckless.

Instead you focus on your comrades barely managing to keep themselves awake, heaving and panting as they try to get on top of the wall.

You throw your hand out to grab a hold of Bertholdts, and struggle to pull him to the top. “Are you okay?” You question.

He nods whilst he lets you go and falls back to try and catch his breath. You turn back around and look down at Reiner to throw your hand out towards him. He doesn’t hesitate and wraps his hand around yours, trying to help you out by using some of the strength he had left to pull himself up as you helped him to the top of the wall. Once he’s safely secured on top, his hand unlike Bertholdts lingers around yours.

It’s a moment you let happen, even if you both had a complicated relationship and tended to argue a lot, even if sometimes you “hated” each other, you don’t pull your hand away. You enjoy the moment, let the warmth of his hand bask yours and bring comfort to your tired and panicked state as you look up to the clouded sky.

It’s not until a sharp, burning pain shoots through your leg and makes you pull your hand away to throw your body forward and briefly grab onto your wound, but stopping as you remind yourself that you had to keep this fact hidden for now. Instead you pretend that you had intended to stand up.

“What are we going to do now?” You wonder as you try to hide the strain in your voice. “Are we really going back home?”

“We have the Jaw Titan, that’s all we need now.” Reiner reminds you.

You scoff and keep yourself from trying to grab onto your wound. “Gone for five years, and we return with something we left with,” you sigh, “we’re going to die.”

“We have information we didn’t leave with,” Bertholdt tries to assure the group.

From the corner of your eyes you watch as the boys and Ymir sit up, they still struggle to control their breath, but you all felt much safer. Or as safe as you could feel here now that the Scouts knew your real identity.

“Beast should be here soon, rest up, we’ll most likely have hell to pay.” There was nowhere to go on top of the wall to hide, but you walked off far enough to feel as alone you could possibly be. Now you had time to deal with your bleeding and throbbing wound.

First you hastily made sure no one was looking at you, albeit that’s when you should’ve taken your time to actually make sure because when you turned away suddenly Reiner was next to you, casting a tall shadow over you that makes you freeze and pull your pant leg down in hopes he didn’t see your wound.

“Do you—”

“When did that happen?” He cut you off.

You avert your gaze and pull off the green cloak that was no longer any use to you to tear off two long pieces of its material. He regardlessly walks before you and demands an answer in a much louder, and angrier voice. “Who did this to you?!”

Your eyebrows furrow at the sound of his voice and you finally make yourself look up to him to give him an answer. “One of the Scouts.” You blink to look back down and continue cleaning your wound to attempt and wrap it the best you could until you could properly heal it. Seeing the shadow still over you, before hearing footsteps begin to quickly pace beside you. “What are you doing?”

“Why didn't you say something sooner?” He seethed.

You scoff and just shrug nonchalantly. “Because I didn’t want to worry anybody. Plus it’s not like I thought you cared.”

He suddenly stops and you feel his eyes burn into you. You continue cleaning your wound, hissing softly as it slightly stings. You didn’t expect him to say something, but you were proven wrong in that next moment because out of the anger you didn’t know he felt, he kicked an abandoned wooden box over the wall, causing you to snap your eyes over to him and fall silent and drop the guarded and angry act you carried around him. “It’s okay.” You hesitantly assure him.

“No,” he snapped back, “you could’ve died and I wouldn’t have known because I wasn’t paying attention!”

Your breath hitches and you feel as if your heart skips a beat, feel your face burn at the sound of his comment. There were moments where you did share your concern over one another, it wasn’t ever with words, but actions, those small vulnerable moments. It was in those times, like the one now, where you dropped all the “hostile” behavior towards him and let those true feelings you tucked away seep through.

Hiding them was a tacking thing, but it was better that way because if something were to happen no one would get hurt. No one would need to react like how he did now.

“It’s okay,” you assure him once you snap away from your train of thought. “I’m alive, and this will heal.”

“It’s not,” he argues whilst he swiftly turns around to face you. “I was reckless, I was foolish.”

“Stop.”

“I didn’t pay attention, it’s my fault.”

“Stop!” You exclaim as you jump to your feet out of frustration. “It wasn’t your fault, I was the one that hid that I was hurt, I didn’t tell you. I got hurt because I was reckless, not you. So please stop blaming yourself, just stop….” You pause and shoot him a pointed look that hid what you really expressed in your eyes. You wanted to play it off that you were angry, but knowing he was worried didn’t allow you to feel anything but touched, and happy; that was before the pain from your wound shot throughout your leg let you feel anything but pain in one moment from the next. Causing you to groan sharply and clutch onto your throbbing leg.

“Fuck.”

“Hey, be careful!”

“Yeah,” you sneer, “I know.”

Reiner walked closer to you and sat you back down, grabbing the cloths you had torn and not hesitating to continue doing what you had been trying to do.

“You don’t have to do that.”

He glances up at you and a soft blush paints on his cheeks. “Let me.” When he doesn’t hear you argue in return he quietly continues to wrap your wound so at least the bleeding would stop. Adding one more thing after a few minutes of comfortable silence. “I’ll do better next time, I’m sorry.”

Your eyes flicker over his face and a sigh leaves your lips, you pull your hand from your side and hesitate for a second before you cup his shoulder. “You saved us, you saved me from the Titans, and from the Scouts. None of us died because of you. You did great.”

Reiner’s light eyes lift to look at you, to share a speechless look while the corner of his lips twitch and his cheeks burn hotter. He clears his throat and doesn’t add anything to your comment but a slight scolding comment. “Just promise to be more careful next time.”

“I can’t promise,” you smile. “I'd be lying if I did.”

Reiner scoffs and finishes wrapping your leg to pull away, grabbing your arm to help you to your feet. “Does it feel better?”

“It hurts,” you exhale, “but at least the bleeding stopped.” You continue to hold onto him as he takes you back to your small group, feeling your smile widen at the warm feeling of his hands around your arms. You let yourself enjoy this small moment and don’t give into the “anger” you faked towards him. “Thank you for helping me.”

The corner of his lips tug slightly and he looks at you while you’re not paying attention to say, “always.”

[7-wonders]

Circling the Drain

Summary: It's a race against time...wait, why do people say that? It's not a race against some outside force, it's a race against a crazed back-from-the-dead mafioso with a vengeance.

Word Count: 3454

A/N: I tried something a little different for this chapter in terms of formatting, mainly because there was so much I wanted to fit in different POVS. Uhhhhh let me know your thoughts and like, comments and reblogs make my world go round. ALSO that second gif is exactly how I imagine a certain scene (you'll know it when you read it).

Warnings: Very torture heavy chapter. Blood, torture methods, guns, knives, kidnappings, talk of death. You should probably go pet some puppies or kittens after you read this.

Previous chapters of Memento Mori: Chapter 1 | Chapter 2 | Chapter 3 | Chapter 4 | Chapter 5 | Chapter 6 | Chapter 7 | Chapter 8 | Chapter 9 | Chapter 10 | Chapter 11

Duncan

It’s difficult to know how much time has passed since Duncan was last outside of this small concrete room. There’s no windows to let light in, no clocks to denote the hour, and no sort of schedule that he can catch on to. Although, even if there were a schedule, he would be too delirious from sleep deprivation to realize that there was one. The only thing that Duncan can count on is the unending torture at the hands of his uncle.

All of the crisis training in the world wouldn’t have prepared him for the physical and mental torture that he’s been put through. Though he doesn’t know it, it’s been almost seventy-two hours of this absolute hell, of Bill beating him black and blue, taunting him, slowly ripping out fingernails one by one (somehow, he still has six, though one of the six is just barely hanging on), refusing to let him sleep, and tasing him back to consciousness whenever he tries to close his eyes. This most recent time, the throbbing of his head had begged him enough to where he finally closed his eyes, only to be jolted up with a rush of electricity running through his body and seizing his muscles.

“You still think you’re getting out of it that easy, huh? That you can fall asleep and bide your time until you’re ‘rescued?’” Bill chuckles. “No, it’s not that easy.”

“Just kill me already, if that’s what you’re planning on,” Duncan says through clenched teeth, glaring up at Bill through the one eye that’s not completely swollen shut.

“Is that what you want? You want me to kill you?” His obviously-fake concern would enough to make bile rise in Duncan’s throat, if he had actually had anything left in his stomach.

“You want me to beg for it, don’t you?”

“I guess I underestimated you. Turns out you do have some sort of critical thinking skills.”

Duncan defiantly turns his head, refusing to give Bill what he wants. Realizing this, Bill begins to walk towards the door. As he does, going to flick off the single light bulb in this place, Duncan’s chest tightens in anticipation of the claustrophobia he’ll surely begin to feel (most likely a side-effect of what he’s gone through, considering he’s never been scared of dark spaces before) and he scrambles to stall him. “So why are you keeping me alive?”

Bill stops for a moment before slowly turning around. “I already told you.”

“No, I know that you want revenge. But what’s your plan? Why waste your time? Surely you’ll at least give me the honor of knowing what I’m dying for?”

His jaw clenches, not pleased with that last question, but he doesn’t hit Duncan. Yet. “I’m taking back what’s mine, and then some.”

“And you think Mom’s going to be okay with that?”

“Your poor mother is going to be more than okay with that when she finds out that the Coven killed her only child.”

Slowly, it dawns on Duncan. “You’re the one that’s been killing people in the Coven’s style and leaving them in our territory?”

“Of course I am!” Bill holds his arms out as if to say ‘tah-dah!’ “Cordelia Goode would never be so bold as to do that! But after I kill you, drain you of your blood, cut your tongue out, dump you in the Potomac, and reappear into society, people won’t care about that little fact. Especially after I reveal that it was the Coven that prompted me to fake my own death and go into hiding for years.”

“How long were you planning this?”

“About a year before you stabbed me, when I realized that you were far too…” he grits his teeth, “charismatic to not end up with the family business eventually. That’s why I always made sure that the police and paramedics were well-paid, just in case the day ever came that I needed them to lie on my behalf.”

“You have it all planned then, so why not just do it and kill me now?”

“Well, there are a couple of minor issues I still need to work out.” Bill glances at Duncan slyly. “Such as what to do with that girlfriend of yours.”

In a flash, Duncan sees red. He lunges, forgetting the fact that he’s chained to the radiator and can only go so far until his ankle is jerked violently and he falls back to the ground. “You leave her alone, she’s done nothing wrong!”

“You’re right, she hasn’t, but (Y/N) knows too much.”

Duncan’s heart skips a beat when he realizes that Bill (predictably) knows more than he should.

“I’m thinking a suicide? It’s very believable, what with the grieving girlfriend and all.” Bill steps forward and, ever so slowly, places his foot on one of Duncan’s hands. “Maybe she slits her wrists in the bath? It’s very easy to overpower someone when they’re vulnerable. Or perhaps she overdoses? That’s not my preferred method, though, far too much room for someone to survive an overdose. Tell me, Duncan, how would you prefer that she die?” With each possible method, Bill continues to lay more pressure on Duncan’s hand until Duncan is moaning in pain.

“Don’t...hurt her,” Duncan pants.

Bill finally removes his foot, giving Duncan a moment to breathe before he stomps on his hand, digging the toe of his shoe in until Duncan is screaming and Bill is sure his hand is broken. “I think she’ll jump into the Potomac with a weight tied around her ankle. The poeticism--her drowning in the same river that your body will be found in--is something that’s just too good to pass up.”

“I’ll kill you. I swear to God, I’ll kill you again and make sure that it sticks this time.” Tears are streaming down Duncan’s face, though whether that’s from the physical or emotional agony he’s in, he can’t be sure.

“We’ll see about that, won’t we?” Bill smiles, walking to the light switch and flicking it off. “I’ll be back in a bit, and then our final act can finally begin.”

This time, Duncan doesn’t stop him before he leaves, barely letting the door close before his willpower crumbles and he begins to sob. Cradling his injured hand, he has to force himself to look at the now-mangled fingers. He gasps, attempting to straighten them out, but they refuse to even twitch in response. It’s now that Duncan realizes that the true torture is waiting. His mind and body shattered, he now has to be at the mercy of Bill Shepherd before he can finally die. He’s never wished for death before, but now, he feels a pang in his heart for every one of his victims that have had to wait, broken and bruised, for Duncan to kill them.

You

“Does this location have any significance to you?” Cordelia asks Annette, pointing to an address hastily written down on a scrap of paper. The address corresponds to a building, fairly nondescript, but obviously holding some sort of significance.

“No, it doesn’t.” Annette shakes her head.

“That’s because this is the location of the first school that I opened here in D.C. Bastard’s really going all in on trying to frame me for everything he’s done.”

(Y/N), who had previously been dozing off on Langdon’s lap (Langdon had already made her swear not to tell anybody or else he would kill her in her dreams like Freddy Kreuger), sits straight up at this moment. “What makes you think he’s there?” she asks.

“This car.” Cordelia pulls another paper out from the folder she had brought with her, this one a picture of a Mercedes E-Class. “It’s been back and forth from Umbra to the old school numerous times in the past two days. License plates are registered back to Umbra.”

“So it’s definitely Bill, then.”

“I’m not typically a betting woman, but I would put money on this. Surveillance indicates that this car has been parked in front of the Goode Academy for six straight hours now.”

(Y/N) doesn’t know much about hostage situations, but she has to assume that Bill being where Duncan is held captive for an extended amount of time means nothing good.

“We need to move now, then,” Annette says. There’s no question behind her voice; she’s going to get her son.

“Yes. Your team?”

“Myself, Langdon, and (Y/N).”

Cordelia glances warily at (Y/N). “Do you have combat experience?”

“Duncan trained me to fight, and also did some weapons training with me,” (Y/N) says.

“That’s good enough.” (Y/N) tries not to be offended. “I have myself, Madison, Misty, and Mallory.”

“We’re going?” Mallory, a brunette wearing a gold headband, says.

“I need my best girls, and you three have proven yourselves.”

“Alright then, let’s go.” Annette grabs a key from around her neck and unlocks what you thought to be a closet door, opening it to reveal a weapons cache large enough to rival a small government’s. “Stock up.”

“Which gun are you most comfortable with?” Langdon asks (Y/N), the two standing side-by-side after everybody else has had their turn.

“Uh, I don’t really know the names. It’s a handgun, and it’s black.”

“Probably a Springfield, then.” Langdon hands (Y/N) a gun that looks similar to ones that she’s handled before. “It’s already loaded.”

“Thanks.” She glances at Langdon after holstering her own weapon, watching as he selects numerous guns of different sizes. “What if we’re too late?”

“We won’t be.”

“But you heard what Cordelia said. Bill’s been there for six straight hours now. He could have--”

“You’re right, he could have,” Langdon interrupts. “But we can’t go in there assuming that the worst outcome has come true. We have to have hope. If nothing else, there’s always hope.”

“I have hope.”

“Good, because I do, too.” Langdon grabs a knife from the weapons closet, twirling the tip of the blade on his index finger. “Now let’s go get Duncan back.”

Duncan

Bill stands before Duncan, twirling the tip of a knife on his index finger. “I’ve held onto this for six years now. Do you recognize it?”

Of course Duncan recognizes the knife that he stabbed his uncle with. In his dreams, he can still feel the cool leather handle gripped tightly in his palm.

“It’s something of a treasure to me, although it certainly didn’t seem like it at first. I’ve come to recognize the significance of holding the thing that almost killed me, and I like to keep it as a reminder.” Bill holds the knife out to Duncan, knowing he’s too weak to fight him for it. “See that on the blade? Why don’t you read it for me?”

Cursive lettering is engraved on the blade, though it was not there when the knife had been in Duncan’s possession. “Memento mori,” Duncan mutters, trying to remember his Latin lessons from high school.

“It was an extremely popular phrase during the medieval period, specifically when it came to funerals. ‘Remember you must die.’ It’s a warning, a reminder. That’s what this knife has become to me, a reminder of the inevitability of death. It also reminds me that I’ve survived death before, and I’ll surely survive it again.”

“Quite the sense of humor,” Duncan remarks dryly.

Bill shrugs, bending down to Duncan’s level. “A little gauche, perhaps, but I enjoy the significance of the phrase.”

Duncan’s about to ask him what the point of this is when Bill shows him by shoving the knife into his abdomen. Duncan grunts in pain, gritting his teeth and glaring at him. “Of course you’re going to stab me just like I stabbed you.”

“Do you know how I managed to survive?” Bill asks.

“I’ve tried not to think about it much.”

“I survived,” Bill continues, “because you were too stupid to realize that you needed to pull the knife out. What do all of the medical professionals say when training civilians on dealing with stabbings? ‘Don’t remove the weapon.’ That’s the only thing keeping them from bleeding out, and it’s what kept me from bleeding out.”

“I had assumed I severed your abdominal aorta, what with all the blood.”

“Exactly, ‘assumed.’” Bill digs the knife around to watch the way that Duncan tries not to scream before pulling it out and watching as blood begins to pour out of the wound. For every beat of Duncan’s frantic heart, trying to pump blood to the source of the injury in an attempt to clot it, more blood pulses out. “Never assume things, my boy.”

Though his head is starting to spin, Duncan finds just enough rage to spit at Bill. “Go to hell.”

“From the looks of it, you’ll be there long before me,” he says almost gleefully before pulling out a gun and shooting him in the thigh. This time, Duncan openly screams. “Just wanted to make sure you actually die, if the stabbing wasn’t enough.” Bill’s extremely nonchalant, as if he’s discussing the nuances of the Nationals rather than talking about murder.

Bill grabs a key and unlocks the chain from around Duncan’s leg, knowing that he won’t have the strength to escape. “I’ll be back in half an hour to check on you.”

“Fuck you,” Duncan responds, but Bill’s already gone.

Duncan moans in pain as he stares at his wounds, feeling the stickiness of blood beginning to pool under him. Lifting a shaky hand, he presses it to his abdomen to try and slow the bleeding. As he swallows deeply, realizing that he very likely is going to die shortly, he thinks about a number of things, mainly regrets.

He wishes that he had realized earlier that his mom was just as much Bill’s victim as he was.

He wishes that he appreciated Michael more for the brother he had been to him.

He wishes that he had told (Y/N) that he loved her more often.

But most especially, Duncan wishes that he had just put a bullet in Bill’s head that night instead of stabbing him. Then, he wouldn’t be feeling this intense cold begin to settle in his bones as he’s forced to slowly die on the concrete floor of a basement. Facing the Grim Reaper head-on is not nearly as dramatic as he thought it would be.

You

Watching the Coven, Langdon, and Annette taking out the defectors is not nearly as dramatic as (Y/N) thought it would be. Wisely, they had requested that she stay behind until the perimeter was secured. It’s much quieter, and a lot less bloody; as it turns out, members of organized crime do have consciences, and chose to subdue those not directly a threat. After Langdon finishes tying those who had remained loyal to Bill together, Cordelia motions for (Y/N) to follow the group into the old school.

The proud sign that once declared this building the Goode Academy now lies in the dirt of the overgrown lawn. The doors are open, solely because the rusted hinges make it impossible for them to remain closed against a gentle breeze. The further that they make it inside, the more frantic (Y/N) is. She knows that they’re close to Duncan, she just doesn’t know what state they’ll find Duncan in. Before they can make it too far with Cordelia as their guide, Bill appears. Instead of holding a machine gun, which is kind of what (Y/N) had expected, he has a concerned look on his face.

“Annette, thank god you’re here! I know this must be confusing to you, but when I heard that Duncan was missing, I knew that I needed to save him from the bitches that had sent me into hiding years ago.”

Confusion blankets (Y/N)’s mind as she tries to figure out what’s going on, but Annette doesn’t feel the same. “Cut the shit, Bill. I know what you’ve been doing.”

Bill laughs. “You’re going to let Cordelia Goode manipulate you into believing her, after she tried to kill me?”

“You’re an idiot. You think I don’t smell the blood in the air?” Annette laughs viciously, a verbal slap in the face. “Where’s my son?”

Like a switch was flipped, the worry on Bill’s face falls into contempt. “You’ve always been too emotional for your own good, Annette.”

“‘Family over everything,’” Annette quotes. “Remember that? What happened to that?”

“That died the day that that--that mistake came back from boarding school and decided that our business, the empire we built from the ground up, was his birthright.”

“You never were good at sharing, were you?”

The siblings stare at each other for a moment before Bill sighs. “You could have just been complicit, but no. Guess I’ll have to think on the fly, then.” He pulls out a gun and cocks the hammer back.

Before he can fire, Madison and Mallory appear from behind him, having snuck into the back. Madison knocks the gun out of his hand, the weapon firing into the ceiling, as Mallory socks him in the face and drives him to his knees. Both women force his hands behind him, holding him still as Cordelia walks up to him.

“The door to the basement is in the kitchen, hidden behind the left wall of the pantry,” Cordelia says to the group.

(Y/N)’s off, moving as fast as she can while maneuvering through the unfamiliar house. “Wait, you can’t do this. Annette, you aren’t really going to let the Coven, of all people, do this to me?” Bill pleads.

“I can actually, and I will. After all,” Annette turns to Cordelia, “we have a deal.”

In the kitchen, (Y/N) throws open the pantry door, pushing and shoving and pulling at the left wall before it finally opens to reveal a set of stairs.

“Girls?” Annette calls just before she reaches the door. “Make it painful.”

(Y/N) runs down the stairs, hands scrambling along the wall until she comes across a light switch. Flicking it on, her eyes look around the room until she sees a lifeless figure on the floor that’s surrounded by a pool of blood. A cry is ripped from her chest as she falls to her knees beside Duncan, hands hovering above him as she tries to figure out what to do first.

He’s pale, scarily so, and he’s breathing so shallowly that she can’t tell he’s breathing at first. Somehow, with all the blood, he’s still breathing. All (Y/N) can focus on is the fact that he’s still alive (later, she’ll wonder how she didn’t even flinch at all of the injuries and the blood, oh, the blood) as she rips her shirt off and presses it firmly against the wound on his stomach, calling his name over and over again in increasing levels of desperation.

From behind her, she can hear Annette scream and yell for Langdon to call an ambulance. She can feel the presence of somebody next to her as they catalogue where Duncan’s hurt, but she can’t bring herself to look away from Duncan’s face. His perfect face, that she’s kissed over and over a thousand times and has taken immense pleasure in watching a blush rise to the surface. His perfect face that she’s now slapping to try and get him to at least show some sort of response.

“You don’t get to die like this,” she tells him, hoping that he’ll somehow manage to hear her. “You said that you didn’t want to be the reason I suffered, but look at you now, making me suffer. Don’t keep me suffering like this!”

Slowly, and just barely, his eyes crack open just enough that (Y/N) can see a hint of blue. His lips move, saying something without audible sound, and she brings her head down to his to try and catch what he’s saying.

“An angel.” She finally makes out what his reverent whisper is over the wail of the incoming ambulances, and laughs brokenly as her head falls onto his chest in relief.

//

@sammythankyou @girlycakepops @ultragibbycentralworld @ajokeformur-ray @nana15774 @queencocoakimmie @lichellaw @grim-adventures58 @dandycandy75 @trimbooohgodplsnoooo @everything-is-awesomesauce @michaellangdon @jimmlangdon @omgsuperstarg @queenie435 @sloppy-little-witch-bitch26 @kahhlo @storminmytwistedmind @1-800-bitchcraft @langdonslove @born-on-stgeorges-day @xavierplympton @michaelsapostle @venusxxlangdon @wroteclassicaly @idespac @tcc-gizmachine @dyns33 @hexqueensupreme @hecatemacbeth7 @youngandfleeting @lambofcairo @myluciferiscody @anacerta @ladyren33 @ladyrindt @dark-mei-rose @sojournmichael @blakewaterxx @9layerdevilfoodcake @angelicmichael @takingback-thecrown @etherealsxnder

[michals]

(Ok this was supposed to be like, a couple of paragraphs but it turned into a freaking essay, so it’s under the cut haha)

On Klaus, Luther and addiction

So this is something I personally find to have a lot of great thematic potential for these two characters. The idea of Luther falling into the same trap that Klaus has for both similar and different reasons and Klaus dealing with Luther’s addictions while facing his own is such a great thru line for both of them. The show’s set them up with the building blocks for this plot point and it would be so easy for it to come into play this season, especially this season actually.

Luther’s build up to addiction is subtle but I think they’ve planted the seeds enough to make it into something. Him falling apart in The Day That Was and his first reaction is to turn to alcohol and drugs is pretty significant considering it’s obvious that he’s probably been very ‘straight edge’ his whole life, probably never having even drank before then. And he tells Klaus straight out that he wishes he was like him, that he didn’t care and that he could just ignore all his own feelings like he thinks Klaus does. (I’ll get into how the family deals with Klaus’s addiction in a minute.) He goes out and  does things under the influence he would never have done while sober, things that end up being self destructive (ie having sex that he seemed to really not want). But even then he’s gotten the idea that if he’s drinking/on something then he’s not thinking about all his shitty feelings.

Season two really sets it up because it’s not just one event but several. In the first ep at the bar he has a drink very casually, like he’s been doing it for years and not just because his life fell apart in the past how many months. The flask when he goes to Vanya’s is really telling firstly because he has a flask on him at all times at this point, that he uses it to get his courage up to go in the barn, and that he does it even when he’s driving. But it’s the nitrous scene that really cements it for me, again simply because he went from being basically a teetotaler to jumping at the first offer of heavy drugs. And he says he should’ve done this a long time ago. If I may get a little personal I know how easy it is to fall into this, the idea of ‘hey alcohol (or drugs) makes me feel better or at least I don’t think/care as much so why wouldn’t I do it?’. It’s such an easy slope to fall down and on the surface Luther has plenty of reasons to want to.

Now, Klaus: there’s plenty already been said about Klaus’s relationship with drugs and alcohol so I won’t get too wordy. Klaus is defined to us right away as a junkie and addict. Someone who uses substances to avoid dealing specifically with his powers and also his shitty upbringing. He plays very fast and loose with his own sobriety and even his mortality. Basically: he uses drugs to avoid thinking or feeling bad, or at least worse but he’s far, far past the point of entry into full blown dependence.

The scene between him and Luther in season 1 is a personal favorite just because it manages to deal with and establish a number of thematic ideas and the potential for how Luther and Klaus’s relationship can go from there. Luther, like the rest of the family, doesn’t understand Klaus’s addiction partially because they’ve all been estranged for 13 years and partially because Klaus doesn’t take it seriously and puts forth a very flippant persona, hell he doesn’t take anything that seriously. The world’s ending, they don’t have the time or inclination to humor Klaus’s story of chocolate pudding. Luther clearly misunderstands his addiction because yes, Klaus comes across as kind of happy and okay with himself but that’s because of the drugs. To Luther who’s been locked up with their asshole of a father Klaus seems to actually have a life of his own.

But Klaus doesn’t try too hard to walk that opinion back and here’s something I find important that tends to get left out when people point out that the family doesn’t take Klaus’s problems seriously: Klaus doesn’t talk about it or try and deal with it. Klaus really really doesn’t like dealing with things if he thinks he can avoid them. His powers, his childhood, Reginald, Ben, his cult – if he can run away from it or make a joke about it instead that’s what he’ll do. The one thing he ever really shows much initiative with is Dave. He’s self centered and I mean that in the most basic way – everything comes down to what he wants to do and he actually keeps his feelings close to the vest for the most part. Basically he doesn’t want to give the others an ‘in’ point to really address it (bonus they all heaps of problems of their own). And when he does get into it just the barest amount with Luther Luther’s high as fuck.

(Just to touch on Ben he kind of doesn’t count because firstly he can’t talk to anyone else and secondly he and Klaus have such a strained relationship especially regarding Klaus’s drug use that even if anyone else could hear him he probably wouldn’t be that supportive.)

So, actually getting into the whole season 3 thing: the siblings are about to face off with a whole lot of daddy and family issues in this time line and everyone’s got huge potential for emotional and mental shakedowns, but I think Luther’s gonna have the worst time of it. Don’t think I’m going to get into that BS of comparing traumas and saying anyone’s more ‘worthy’ of sympathy than any of the others, I’m saying specifically because it’s to do with Reginald not only rejecting him yet again and outright replacing him but that it’s not even ‘his’ Reginald so does that mean all the shit he put Luther through doesn’t count? I just see it as catalyst for a real breakdown for him.

Not to say this won’t mess with Klaus but Klaus hated Reginald long ago and has accepted that the guy was a douchebag and had no real love for his children, so personally I see his drug use as dealing with Reggie’s abuse but more so to deal with his powers. So yes, this’ll absolutely fuck with him but Luther’s the primo target here.

So what if we see Luther leaning even harder into drinking or even heavier things? Now he really has an excuse to because where’s he supposed to go from here? What’s he meant to do? He’s not the leader anymore, his family doesn’t always treat his trauma seriously (Klaus parallels there) nevermind he doesn’t even like to address it himself, he has no idea who he’s supposed to be and the one person who he thought actually cared about him not only doesn’t but never did and now he’ll never get back what he saw as his purpose in life. The whole Ben being alive thing is just icing on the cake. If he spirals in s3 it would make perfect sense because of all this and all the set up for it.

Klaus spiraled too at the end of s2 again becoming the fatalistic junkie he used to be, he’s gonna run from his problems again but it’s not just his powers this time. So he’s off the wagon but what if he notices Luther is too?

I can definitely see Luther trying to hide it from the others. He’s already given away too much of his weaknesses, he doesn’t want them to see their ‘leader’ continue to fall and I don’t think he’d want them to know he’s still that affected by Reginald. They want him to have dealt with it, like he seems to have at least a little in s2, if he’s completely fallen apart because of his dad again then that just makes him look pathetic. So he keeps his flask and finds excuses to get away with stumbling or slurring his words. But Klaus notices, because Klaus knows the signs.

In that scene in s1 Klaus very obviously doesn’t like seeing Luther like that or using drugs as an escape like he does. He’s self aware enough to know that this isn’t any way to live but is too pessimistic when it comes to himself. But, again, he tends to be pretty self centered. This is not a bad thing, this is a great character trait and it makes Klaus interesting. He does not know how to relate to his siblings on the whole, doesn’t know how to talk about his own traumas and addictions, so when he does hear them out it’s usually because he had was focusing on his own shit first. For instance: when he has the heart to heart with Allison in her kitchen he’s only there in the first place because he was falling apart because of Dave.

Luther having a problem will have to be something Klaus purposefully chooses to deal with because he’s worried about one of this siblings. And for obvious reasons Klaus is the perfect one to help him with it. He doesn’t want to see Luther like that but he doesn’t really have a leg to stand on if he wants him to stop. Hell, if Klaus won’t stop why should Luther? Klaus can’t use ‘do what I say not as I do’, partially because Luther has proven to have some self destructive/self harming tendencies and again, if it makes him feel okay or at least steady then why would he stop?

But Klaus stopping means that he’s going to have to confront his quite literal demons when it comes to his powers (I could go off on how much I don’t love that he was somehow sober for 3 years in the 60’s no problem but it didn’t seem to affect his powers at all but that’s another post). The number one thing he’s been running from his whole life, something the show hasn’t actually done a whole lot with. We knows he hates it, we knows he’s tortured by it, but we’ve seen no evidence that he’s ever really confronted it. He was traumatized by Reggie who did everything wrong so he went the opposite route.

But what if he has to stay sober for Luther’s sake? Even if he doesn’t want to help, even if he just enables it or joins him at first eventually he’d have to come the realization that he doesn’t like this, that he wouldn’t wish this kind of problem on someone he cares about. So he’s going to have to turn inward, he’s going to have to face up to both his addiction and his powers, maybe even finally try to tame and use his powers. And at some point he’d have to talk to Luther about it and stop hiding behind his glib façade.

So in the end we’d get to see Luther falling apart trying to deal with everything that he still very much needs to deal with and his subconscious tendency for self destruction, Klaus confronting his addictions, his own feelings and relationship to his siblings, and his powers and hell, maybe then we’ll actually get him using his powers to his/the group’s benefit.

[robininthelabyrinth]

If you write more for the NM/LW/WWX fic I would lose my entire mind

part 1, part 2

“You know that I was joking, right?” Nie Mingjue asked his younger brother, feeling a little bemused.

He’d only meant to tease a little: it hadn’t taken much time in Wei Wuxian’s presence to realize that the man was inclined towards physical contact with others that often blurred (or simply ignored) the line of propriety, so finding him having clambered into Lan Wangji’s lap to win an argument hadn’t been really a surprise – and neither was Lan Wangji’s reaction, which was to act as though Nie Mingjue had walked in on the two of them engaged in adultery.

Ah, the Lan sect and their rules.

Nie Mingjue was very bad at teasing, actually, a fact Nie Huaisang never failed to mock him over; he had very early on in life perfected an expression that revealed nothing and had somewhere along the line forgotten how to do anything else with his face, and so people invariably took him to have no sense of humor at all when that wasn’t the case at all.

He wasn’t sure if this counted as another instance of that.

Wei Wuxian was so enthusiastic about the idea, too – talking about how convenient it would be (for what?), the political benefits they would derive (never specified), and how it solved all the problems (there had been problems?) – and Lan Wangji was just bright red all the time, stealing glances underneath his lashes, and –

To be perfectly honest, Nie Mingjue had no idea how this had all happened.

Oh, the beginning had been clear enough. Nie Mingjue had never actually seriously considered the question of marriage, having always planned to leave the sect to his younger brother – no matter how Nie Huaisang protested, Nie Mingjue was determined that it would go to him in time, and to his children thereafter, and perhaps at last his ancestor’s line would no longer be afflicted with their hereditary rage which was only in part due to their cultivation style.

Since he didn’t intend to have children, he didn’t intend to marry – his choices were his own, and not something he would impose on a woman – and that had been that, at least until Jiang Cheng had burst in through his door with an ancient contract in hand.

A cutsleeve marriage hadn’t ever occurred to him as an option, but Jiang Cheng had been desperate, all but throwing himself down on his knees to ask that Nie Mingjue consider the proposal as the only means to save his shixiong and his sect, plus a political bargain besides.

It had seemed as decent an option as any. The love match between the Jin heir and the Jiang daughter was extremely convenient for the Jin sect; this would be a good way to balance things out, and keep the inexperienced and still healing Jiang sect from becoming mere weapons in the hands of Lanling Jin.

After thinking it over, Nie Mingjue had expressed his consent, agreed to handle all the arrangements, and then gone to tell Nie Huaisang about it.

“Are you sure about this?” Nie Huaisang had asked, oddly solemn and intense. “What about – the other parts of marriage?”

“Sex, you mean?” he’d replied. He’d faced up years ago to the fact that Nie Huaisang was an unusually avid collector (and a purveyor, at this point) of erotic art, and who even knew where he’d gotten the taste for it; it was easier to just be blunt and straightforward about this sort of thing than try to dance around the subject. “I’m willing to follow his lead. Sect Leader Jiang said he was agreeable, but that could be just to the political aspect; if he prefers not to be in my bed, I can find relief elsewhere.”

“And if he does want to be in your bed?”

“Then I’ll bed him,” Nie Mingjue had said, not really seeing the issue. His tastes had always been as straightforward as he was, without discrimination by gender or even overly much by appearance; if they liked him, and he liked them, it was good enough for him – why bother thinking it over any more than that? “He seemed lively enough.”

Nie Huaisang had sighed. “Yes, he’s lively all right; more importantly, he’s competent, and that’s been your thing since forever. But that’s not – a marriage isn’t just sex. I know what you’re like, da-ge, better than anyone: when you’re sincere, you’re sincere, and nothing can be done about it. I’d even assumed, once, that you would end up marrying – well, never mind. The question remains: even if you’re indifferent now, what happens if you fall in love?”

“Then I’d be in love with my husband?” Nie Mingjue had hazarded. “That doesn’t seem like a problem?”

Nie Huaisang had groaned, declared Nie Mingjue ‘a useless good-for-nothing when it comes to romance’, and agreed to handle all aspects of the marriage going forward.

And now –

“Oh, yes, I know you were joking when you said that,” Nie Huaisang said, tapping his fan to his lips the way he did when he was scheming something. It was usually something stupid (how to get out of responsibilities, how to get something he wanted, how to pull a truly amazing prank on someone he disliked) but in all actuality Nie Mingjue’s brother was incredibly smart, endlessly stubborn, and highly capable, no matter how he tried to hide his light under a bushel. There was a reason Nie Mingjue wanted their sect to go to him. “But the question is – are you?”

Nie Mingjue stared at him. “What?”

“You don’t have to be joking,” Nie Huaisang said. “You could marry them both. It’s not as if our treasury couldn’t afford the dowries, especially after all our victories in the war.”

“But there isn’t any reason for it. We already have a connection to the Lan sect – I’m sworn brothers with their sect leader!”

“Yes,” Nie Huaisang said patiently. “There is no political benefit to it whatsoever. You could still do it.”

Nie Mingjue opened his mouth, then closed it, and then finally shot Nie Huaisang a look that asked him to explain.

“Wei-xiong and Lan-er-gongzi are both extremely desirable,” Nie Huaisang said. “They’re brilliant cultivators, incredibly smart, incredibly powerful, highly principled – Wei-xiong had the integrity to stand up for the Wen remnants even against the entire cultivation world, Lan-er-gongzi has always acted for the greater good without any doubt or reservation. There’s a reason they’re ranked so highly in the list of young masters.”

He leaned back in his seat, shifting over and starting to idly fan himself.  

“Take Lan-er-gongzi: he’s one of the most technically skilled cultivators of my generation, whether in music, sword, archery, or otherwise; there’s isn’t one of the six arts in which he’s lacking, and he’s already known for always being where the chaos is, no matter how little fame it may bring him. Wei-xiong, in turn, is among the most creative cultivators alive, inventing not only an entire new path of cultivation but a myriad of inventions that have proven helpful to all– the spirit attraction flag, the compass of evil, just to name two – and he’s shared them openly, without the slightest inclination to keep them back for his own sect over others. In short, both of them have qualities you greatly admire in people.”

Nie Mingjue nodded. There was nothing wrong with Nie Huaisang’s analysis, excepting only his omission that they had both been fierce advocates of his war against the Wens, both having made significant contributions both on their own merits and through their advocacy – without the two of them, the war might not yet have been won.

For Nie Mingjue, whose filial duty to his father demanded Wen blood, that was a strong mark in their favor.

“Based on what you’re telling me,” Nie Huaisang continued, “for whatever reason, both of them seem to be interested in you. You’re one of the few people who can reliably read Lan expressions: if you tell me Lan Wangji isn’t opposed to the idea, it’s all but saying that he’s fiercely in favor of it. Wei Wuxian hasn’t been even remotely shy about how much he likes the concept. So that brings me to my question: do you want them?”

Nie Mingjue opened his mouth, only to find a fan on his lips, silencing him.

“I want you to think about this seriously, da-ge,” Nie Huaisang said. “If you’re really determined for me to be the next Sect Leader Nie, you’ll eventually have to listen to me, so start now. For once in your life, don’t think about the sect. Don’t think about me. Don’t think about anything. No considerations, no benefits and disadvantages, nothing at all. Just close your eyes, think about the two of them, think about the fact that you can have them if you want them, and then tell me – do you want them?”

[thetriggeredhappy]

in the latest Dad!Spy fic, it seems like both of them have a degree of separation anxiety. largely *reasonable* separation anxiety because of the whole, y'know, Spy (and eventually Scout) being a mercenary thing, but it's still fascinating to see. i wonder how Spy would deal with easing Jeremy's anxiety and his own all the while knowing that he very well COULD be killed and leave his young son alone any time something goes wrong with work

spy as a dad would i think be extremely concerned about his kid’s safety to the point of paranoia, and the worst part of it all would be all the times when his paranoia is justified.

(warnings for discussion of canon-typical violence, none of it happening onscreen, and assorted mention of spy-type business)

-

Something about this felt so deeply... dishonest. Something he couldn’t quite place. Maybe some sense of irony, or... maybe just the sort of general guilt he’d had as a very young man starting to reverberate within him again. Whatever it was, sitting there and writing down the cipher of a message intended to ensure his son’s safety if he died, while that aforementioned son slept soundly against his shoulder, felt deeply morally wrong.

His eighth birthday was coming up. It was, according to Jeremy, a pretty big deal. And Jacques was aware that most children in more average situations would be having a party together, eating cake and playing games and having fun while he theoretically chatted with the other parents and talked about... school, or, extracurriculars. He wasn’t sure, to be honest, that was just his assumption. But Jeremy’s situation was anything but average, so he’d be making an attempt to do something else, something he’d enjoy enough that perhaps he would be able to put off the conversations of “why can’t I have normal friends?” for one more year. He’d heard about and marked down an annual fair, and found that this year the weekend it was taking place just so happened to also fall on Jeremy’s birthday.

It was a good excuse for why they were leaving town so swiftly. Much more justifiable to himself and more explainable to a very-nearly-eight-year-old than whispers on the wind of a pair of men he thought he’d killed twelve years previously being seen within the state and that alone being enough to make him very very nervous. He did not believe in coincidences, and moreover, he knew that him finding out about these men being alive was not an accident, it was a warning, and the only one he would be receiving before they struck to kill.

Regardless, he was still a bit troubled by it. And he knew it was an adjustment from the plans he’d been hesitantly laying for some time on where he would be and when, his route a closely guarded secret meant to be known to exactly three trustworthy people in entirely seperate areas of the world, and even then it was a risk he would never have taken previously. But him going missing would be several degrees more significant, as he’d realized roughly eight years ago.

A movement to shift, trying to keep his arm from falling asleep, was enough to wake up Jeremy, who blinked a few times down at what Jacques was writing as if waiting for the letters to make sense. “Is that Russian?” he mumbled sleepily after two minutes of silence.

“No,” he said, having to pause in his writing entirely, broken from the rhythm he’d gotten into. “It’s a cipher. Secret symbols and letters.”

“Oh,” Jeremy said simply, and went silent and still for long enough that he convinced himself that he’d surely fallen back asleep, and he was a bit startled when he spoke again. “Who are you writing secret symbols at?”

“A friend of mine,” he answered carefully, if kindly. “You’ve met him. Twice, actually. A very large man, who also wore a suit. I believe you told him you really liked his tie.”

Peter was a good man, or as good as one could be given the circumstances the two of them both worked in. He had made a very genuine effort at, as Jacques had requested, ‘easing up’ on the usual intimidating way that he carried himself when he’d been been told Jeremy would be there at one of the very brief meetings the two of them had. One was when Jeremy was three, and fully preoccupied with a gift he’d received for the holidays, and the other was when Jeremy was six. Apparently, Peter had decided the best way to appear less intimidating to a young child was to wear a tie plastered with a pattern of cartoonish bubbles. Jacques thought it was perhaps the most ridiculous thing he’d ever seen, but was promptly proven wrong when Jeremy pointed it out gleefully within moments of being in a room with the man.

If Jacques died unexpectedly in most of the mainland United States and immediately surrounding territories, Peter would likely be the one taking care of Jeremy. At least until the other two correspondents could stop by and negotiate further on what would happen with him. Peter, at least, could cook and survive alone for multiple people (as he’d proven before on at least one occasion where Jacques was too injured to take care of himself and required assistance), and if he would stoop so low as to wear a bubble-patterned tie because he wanted to avoid intimidating a six-year-old, he was likely capable of stooping low enough to perform other essential activities involved with raising a child.

“I don’t remember that,” Jeremy muttered, shifting slightly.

“That is fair,” he nodded. “You do meet a lot of people, mon lapin, it is not easy keeping names straight.”

He hummed in sleepy agreement. A pause. “That one looks like a dog,” he finally said, pointing at one of the little letters on the page.

He tilted his head, squinting a little. “Hm. I suppose it does,” he acquiesced.

“Does it mean dog?”

“It is not kanji, the characters represent letters, which spell words in German,” Jacques replied.

“Is it that letter that looks like a B but it isn’t and sounds like that one dog?”

“...Are you referring to an eszett?”

“Yeah.”

“...And what dog does it sound like, exactly?” Jacques asked, fully baffled.

“The one that howls really loud.”

“Howls really—mon lapin, are you referring to a basset hound?”

“Yeah!” he agreed, sitting up a little and smiling. “That’s it!”

He wanted to further investigate why the word eszett reminded his son of basset hounds, but Jeremy picked that moment to yawn, reminding him of something.

“Well, dogs or otherwise, I do believe that it’s past your bedtime. You should go to sleep,” he said, no room in his tone for argument.

The whining noises began and were silenced by a swift kiss to the top of his head and the setting aside of the notebook he was working from, moving as if to pick up Jeremy and properly put him to bed. But then more genuine protests began, Jeremy moving to dart beneath the sheets before he could even properly set his pen down.

“Can I sleep here tonight?” he asked earnestly, employing the use of his big blue too-much-like-his-mother’s eyes. A slightly disapproving tilt of the head did nothing to dissuade him, so Jacques sighed inwardly, standing regardless.

“Alright, alright,” he surrendered as he moved to also get ready for sleep, “but I will be awake rather early in the morning, and you do not get to complain at me if you also end up awake as a result.”

Jeremy didn’t look upset by this caveat in the slightest, just burrowing further and smiling like he’d won some sort of contest.

And he looked asleep enough by the time Jacques was back that he was very quiet and careful about getting back into bed, but woke up regardless with the express intent of tucking against his arm again.

And he knew he would miss this one day. His son was already growing up much too fast, and at very-nearly-eight-years-old was closer in many ways to twelve, and surely only had another year or so before he would be much too embarrassed to lean against his father’s shoulder this way, to comment upon how things looked like an animal, to speak so freely. Soon he would be having secrets, a life of his own that he’d know nothing about, and he looked forward to it of course but he would also miss it so very dearly.

He’d hate to miss any more of it by dying unexpectedly.

He wished he didn’t need to prepare for the worst. He wished he didn’t feel guilty for needing to work out details about what would happen if the nightmare scenario occurred. And more than that, he wished he didn’t have to feel all the more guilty about having no plan at all for what he would do if something happened to Jeremy. It was unthinkable. He couldn’t imagine having a world without his son in it, not anymore.

And so he leaned back as well, albiet so much more carefully with the understanding of the fact that children tend to be fragile, and couldn’t imagine.

[killian-whump]

Game Night! [Liveblog #1]

Alright folks! There’s been a lot of to-do over the last couple days over this video... a lot of debate over paid content and whether folks have $10 or not and whether it’s worth $10 or not and who paid what for who to see it and why can’t we all just get along and what the hell are blobs, anyway?

Long story short, this video has proven rather difficult to rip from the site in order for us poor folks to share the video amongst ourselves so everyone can enjoy it... so I’m going to attempt to liveblog it in a fun, animated way that will (hopefully) let you all sort of enjoy it along with me. ‘Cos I paid ten fucking dollars to make sure everyone could enjoy it, and I’m going to make you all enjoy it somehow even if I have to make you a post like this.

Note: I don’t want any bitchy asks about how terrible it is for me to “ruin” the exclusivity of paid content or whatever. I’m a pirate. If I could, I’d rip the fucking thing off the website and send it to every person I know who doesn’t have $10 to spare or a credit card to use. So don’t waste your breath trying to shame me for making this post - I do not care.

Without further ado... LET’S ENJOY SOME CUTE COLIN CONTENT.

Okay... Here we go. I have to admit, Josh has a cute, professional-looking intro for his little channel/show here. I mean, it’s still a zoom call he recorded. But the intro looks professional.

Anyway... Josh is now introducing the show, and he makes a joke about his celebrity friends... or fake friends... or sort of friends... and then says, “We’re real friends, right Sam?” and Sam’s like, “No.” and Colin goes:

I DIDN’T EVEN MEAN FOR THAT TO LOOP PERFECTLY, GUYS, IT JUST DOES - and I feel like this is a fortuitous start to our journey.

Oh, there’s also some nice upbeat jazzy sort of music here, so you can play some while you read this post, that’s probably a good idea.

Now we have bagpipes as Josh introduces Sam...

HAHA, Josh introduces Colin: “He’s probably too classy to be here, but he’s also too kind to say no to me... You know him from Once Upon a Time and The Right Stuff: It’s Colin O’Donoghue.” Colin waves and Josh goes, “hey buddy” like he’s talking to a puppy, because he basically is, and Colin goes, “Hi Josh.”

Josh: Colin, is that the first time you’ve been called classy? Do I have you pegged wrong? Colin: It’s probably the first, and I suspect will be the only time I’ll be called classy.

I have to take a moment here to say that Colin still has a crap camera, lol. He sounds like he’s phoning in from a tin can under the sea, and his picture’s already broken up a couple times. Like, if my $10 went towards buying Colin a new webcam, I wouldn’t mind it. I’M JUST SAYING.

Now we’re talking about the trash-talking capabilities of the group... and Kat says something, Sam says he can’t hear what she said, and Colin says he can’t hear anything. I take back the nice things I said about the professionalism of the intro, like please, can we do a sound check 😭

Topic moves on to fandom overlaps... Kat says something about how they all wield swords on TV, so people who enjoy that would probably enjoy all of their shows. Sam nods thoughtfully and shakes his head a little as she speaks, and Colin looks frozen in time with a neutral smile on, in a way that makes me pretty sure neither of them heard a goddamn word of what she said. Josh repeated the bit about sword-wielding, and now the guys are chuckling and talking swords. Sam informs Josh that he doesn’t wield a sword, but at least he has a plant.

And it’s game time! We’re starting with Would You Rather...

We’ve got an animated intro... and then some sparkles and pictures to illustrate the questions, which all seems rather superfluous when we paid $10 to look at celebrities, but whatever, I mean, it’s his show.

First question: Would you rather hear dogs’ thoughts or your significant other’s thoughts? Colin says dogs. Josh asks why, and Colin laughs as he says “I suspect I know them, and I really don’t think... I really don’t think I want to know them sometimes.” He also says he has a dog, and he’d like to know what he’s thinking half the time. Sam says dogs, as well, because “they’re gonna be way more interesting than your partner” and this greatly amuses Colin.

(By the way, I’m using a GIF program with a screen recording function to make these GIFs. It’s not a viable method for recording the whole thing, but it works good for GIFs :))

Second Question: Would you rather have the body of The Rock with your face? Or the face of The Rock with your body? Kat answers, and then Josh says, “Colin you had something?” and Colin goes, “I didn’t really have something” because he didn’t really have something. He says it’s a real Catch-22, and takes a minute, but finally goes with “the body of The Rock... with my head on it, I guess.” Sam agrees, and there’s some chat about how awesome The Rock is. Colin also said The Rock has an amazing body.

Third Question: Would you rather always be naked or always be wearing the most embarrassing, uncomfortable costume you’ve ever worn? Josh shared a snippet of this part on his Twitter and Colin re-tweeted it, so you can actually see this part. Sam says he can’t stop thinking of when he wore Colin’s costume... and Colin’s having fun playing offended :D Kat answers and then Colin says his worst costume was when he had to wear just a pair of Y-fronts (he’s talking about when he did the play Outlying Islands), so he might as well pick being naked, and I’m feeling a little better about that $10 I spent if he’s gonna go on saying things like that and then making faces like this:

Bahahaha, Colin shares that the Y-fronts “had been stained for the production” 😂 Kat’s giving him two thumbs up and Josh intones, “The glamorous world you guys inhabit.”

Fourth Question: Would you rather have a mouth full of bees or one bee in your butt? 😂 “I’d probably have a bee in my butt,” Colin O’Donoghue states, after giving this very serious question a very serious moment of thought. Meanwhile, your fearless liveblogging friend had to rewind a couple times here, due to the sheer force of her laughter. Everyone looks flummoxed. This appears to be a real dilemma. Josh tells us that this (the bee in the butt) seems to be the common consensus, and that this is what Sam answered when Josh had asked him this question previously. “And how did that work out?” Sam asks. Josh says he doesn’t know and, “Have you tried it out?” “It’s still in there,” Sam says. Kat agrees with the ‘bee in the butt’ consensus, I’m pretty sure Colin and Sam still can’t hear her, and Josh thanks them for giving that question the intelligence it doesn’t deserve.

And that’s it for Would You Rather?! And this seems like a good spot to take a break and maybe have a beverage and post this bad boy, so you guys can start having fun too - and so I don’t end up with TOO long of a single post :)

As always, you can use any GIFs/caps in here however you like :)

Here’s a handy link to go on to PART TWO...

[mallowstep]

Please tell us more! Why did Moth take Jay and not the other two? Who ended up being Jay's mentor? Do they not have any other traditions that could take the place of proving the river accepts cats? Does Jay get looked down upon because of that? How's his fishing skills? Does he get a mate in this au? Anything else you would like to share? Every time I see you post a new au idea I immediately get obsessed lol

why did moth take jay?

because that was the prompt and i liked it. holly goes to windclan because she looks like nightcloud, and lionkit goes to thunderclan because he looks like squirrelflight, and that just leaves jaykit.

who's jaypaw's mentor?

beechfur.

can he be accepted another way?

okay so. being accepted is not like. one thing. it is just. something that proves you are meant to be here. it can be something small, it can be something large, but there's always something. for example, for spottedpaw in stolag, it's this:

She opened her mouth, but before she could say anything, he continued, "Even you, Spottedpaw, carry the blood of the River." He blinked, slowly. "You wouldn't belong here if you didn't, but look. Greypool's kits are sleeping by your side, same as any other cat, and don't think I haven't seen the way you watch the water. You carry the divine in you."

it's a small moment, but this is when the whole, blood of the river thing is explained to her. and that's enough.

my other example would be dovepaw from icbtyssm, but (a) spoilers and (b) most dovepaw scenes are like, 4k words. but for her, it's a very private moment before she's even decided to stay in riverclan. she has a more dramatic moment, but being accepted is when you prove you can do what only riverclan cats can do:

As time went on, only cats with the River in their blood could see the water spirits the Moon made, and they were the strongest swimmers and the best fishers.

so basically, there are three main methods: be able to see spirits, be a good swimmer, or be a good fisher.

jaypaw is blind, so he can't see a spirit (it's specifically a visual thing. riverclan's medicine cat traditions are actually quite visual. they would of course adapt as necessary, but i think for a cat not proven to be riverclan, the clan would have a hard time accepting, "i didn't see a spirit but i did perceive one" as a valid thing).

and swimming and fishing is what they learn during their apprenticeship.

it's how most cats prove themselves! they learn to swim and fish and it proves that they belong. again, it's not like...a formal moment, but it is. it's a little ambiguous, because of riverclan's general culture.

anyway, he can't prove himself as a kit, so leopardstar can't mentor him.

(also jumping in at the end: there are other ways to prove you're part of riverclan. there's no specific list. those three are the big ones that most cats use, but there's no set list.

for example, spottedpaw is accepted by the kits of riverclan treating her like "any other cat."

so there's always, like, a way for a cat to prove themselves. but they might have to find that way out, y'know?)

does jaypaw get looked down upon?

it's complicated.

riverclan believes that cats who carry the river's blood are divine. it's a whole thing.

so in that sense, yeah, he's spiritually inferior to his clanmates until it's satisfied that he belongs.

and that is a huge sore spot for him. because he feels like a riverclan cat from birth. and riverclan you know, just one drop is enough. "the divine cannot be diluted" is a really common idea in my riverclan fics. it comes up in "there's holy water, undiluted; i see the divine", "denouncement", and "the blood is rare and sweet as cherry wine."

but he just, needs to be accepted. it's worth mentioning that riverclan isn't trying to be exclusionary. it's just saying, riverclan cats like to swim and fish and you need to be able to do that to be one of us.

because they don't actually care who your birth parents are, as long as you can effectively pass a citizenship test.

but kids can't take the test, so jaykit grows up with this background worry of what if i fail. and passing isn't complicated. it does not take a lot to pass. but that's after he's been an apprentice.

which is why when breezepaw points out he's not a clan cat by birth, jaypaw gets pissed. like yeah, jay is painfully aware of that.

however, riverclan doesn't strictly look down on him. it's more that. hm okay like, the ending for the story of the river forming riverclan ends in "the river flows in us all" and jaykit knows that, he's not included in that "us all" yet.

but in every other respect, riverclan understands he could be. he's just a kit.

so. it's Complicated.

i don't think any other kits would tease him tho. willowkit would beat them up.

how's his fishing skills?

i'm not sure! i need to do some research into blind cats and fishing. i suspect he'd be able to dive, but i'm not sure. he can't fish in the standard riverclan sense, i don't think, but he should be able to do at least some form of fishing.

although even if he couldn't fish at all, riverclan would still love him.

does he get a mate?

yeah kestrelflight. jaykestrel and hollywillow feat. kestrel and willow pestering each other about their significant others every half moon.

anything else you would like to share?

i'm really excited to explore riverclan from yet Another angle. i know it might be a while before i get here, but for me, like.

riverclan is interesting because of their whole "we're all divine" thing because on one hand. it's why they're so accepting. because they're all divine. if you're different, you can't be worse. you're just different.

it's baked into their spirituality.

but (a) that's not the same as feeling like you're an equal and accepted, and (b) jaykit isn't know to be divine, and he knows it would be so much easier if he could just see.

i don't particularly like narratives about jay wishing he could see in General, but it's definitely a pretty sore spot in this au specifically because it would make matters a lot easier.

anyway, it's a very "once you're one of us, you're one of us, but if you're not, we're all above you" sense.

(again, this isn't put on jaykit because he's a kit and hasn't had a chance, but it's not like he's not aware of that fact.)

but i created this because it's an interesting idea that has given me so many good stories to tell:

spottedleaf being accepted into a very spiritual clan as a very spiritual cat; the fact that it's not enough for her to be fated to go to riverclan, she is also shown to be accepted

mistyfoot hanging on to this idea that she is riverclan, she is divine; that no matter what happens, she is better than tigerstar, that what he is doing to her (and featherpaw) is fundamentally wrong, that there can be no true justification

leopardstar grappling with the fact that tigerstar ruins riverclan; that she is divine and he is mortal and yet he disgraces her, that she is riverclan and she has brought it down

(along with some unpublished ones ;3)

but now i get to add

jaypaw, riverclan by birth (although he doesn't know that), needing to prove himself; all of riverclan wanting to accept him but needing the spiritual significance of proof that he can't provide until he's reasonably old.

[incoherentbabblings]

can i get a long post about why tim/steph worked out when tim/ari, tim/zo and tim/cassie didn't?

To be honest, I really struggled with this one because...well, so here’s the thing. Tim and Steph didn’t work out. That is, if you are saying 2011 is the end of that timeline with those specific iterations of those characters, Tim and Stephanie as a couple failed. Fairly spectacularly really. Like, you can make an argument that people died because of it even. Twice if you count the very end of Robin with all the crap with Ulysses. 

There are things which they got right that the others didn’t, sure. And you can say Convergence was the genuine last time we saw those iterations of those characters, in which case, yes, they got there in the end. And though I would like to think that the two would have reunited in the end, their respective solo runs do not end with them as a couple. Tim doesn’t even really get a mention in Steph’s final issue, and vice versa. Like, they focus on the main thematic points of their series - Tim and his relationship with his fathers, Stephanie and justifying her existence as a vigilante. Don’t get me wrong they matter deeply to each other and they probably do still love each other...they just have more important things on their mind when the other is not in the room.

But even so, between 2004 and 2015 (or 2016 if you count Rebirth instead of Convergence), Tim and Stephanie were not a couple. And one of the reason they failed was the same as for Arianna, Zoanne, Tam etc., didn’t work out. (Cassie is kind of it’s own ballpark). Tim could not keep his girlfriends in the loop. Either as Robin or as Tim Drake. There are other things that made them flatline, and I think at the end of the day what made Tim’s relationship with Steph fail was a little different, but that’s the jist. For the long and short of it:

Ari/Zo: Largely Tim’s fault. Too secretive about Robin.

Tam: Entirely Tim’s fault. Too secretive about both Tim and Red Robin.

Steph: Equally at fault. She trusted Bruce over Tim. Tim didn’t trust her enough period.

Cassie: Equally at fault. Grief is not a good reason for a rebound.

Lynx: Boy was just horny.

So, for Ariana, it was genuinely just because they were too young. They were fourteen when they split up. Ariana said it was because they were getting too serious at too young an age; Tim because he was tired of lying to her about Robin and also the will they/won’t they of Tim and Steph had been rolling on for fifty plus issues and Steph was just a more interesting character than Ari and was the preferred option by the readers so hey. There you go. End of. Tim cheated on her with Steph repeatedly, emotionally and smooching. Ari cheated because she felt ignored and left behind by Tim. He fell asleep in the car as she was telling him. Also Ari was insecure, because she was fourteen and every fourteen year old is insecure, so she did things like dye her hair (because Tim was staring at Steph at funeral not because he was gobsmacked by her beauty or anything it was less of a ‘holy shit she’s so pretty and blond’ and more of a ‘holy shit if she sees me my secret identity is blown’) or try to keep Tim’s attention on her by sleeping together. Which, again, they were fourteen. So in many ways, she was right in her reasoning. There was a lot going on there for people barely starting adolescence, but Tim’s general emotional and physical absence made their problems seem huge and overwhelming, when really, it was just because they were fourteen. Everything is such a big deal when you’re fourteen.

It’s kind of a similar thing with Zo. Now, I don’t know if it was intentional, but it’s sometimes said that your next partner after a big breakup is often the complete opposite of your previous. Zo comes from a nice middle class background with parents who are still together and are very loving. She is very school orientated and in fact tutored Tim. She is also (bless her) very boring. Which is arguably what Tim wanted. He’s still trying to convince himself that there’s a Tim Drake life worth living. However, same issues as Ari arise. Emotional and physical absence. Only this time it’s both the pressure or Robin plus the lovely trauma of dead family and friends. He can’t keep up with Tim Drake anymore. He falls asleep on a rollercoaster and can’t tell Zo why. He cheats on her with Steph (again emotionally and smooching). He breaks up with her over the phone. He kinda gets a bit grabby and manhandle-ly at points, physically lifting and carting her around when they are having an argument and she does not want to listen. Tim is... not good to Zo. At all. 

Ari and Zo fail as relationships because they only know Tim Drake, except who Tim Drake is... is Robin. So they aren’t really in a relationship with Tim as a whole, so inevitably they both crumble.

The reason Cassie didn’t work out was just because they were out of their minds with grief. The cult arc and the cloning was bad. Like it was just a bad storyline. Rebounds like that (which timeline wise was occurring at the same time Tim was taking an interest in Zo) were bound to fail. Cassie deserves better!!!!!!!!!! Stupid goddamn writers.

Tam is tricky. Because she, like Steph, actually gets the privilege of knowing about Tim and Red Robin. She does it ‘backwards’, so her issue is having the realisation that yeah Red Robin is really cool but Tim Drake is a mess. And he still lies to her. There’s a few times where she has moments of realisation of how messed up Tim Drake is by the time she meets him. Her leaving is explicitly because that cool person who saved her from the LoA is also the kind of person to lie and throw people under the bus if it serves the greater good (what Tim thinks is the greater good). And she wants no part in that. It’s emotionally taxing to say the least. Also Tim cheats on her with Lynx. Constantly. And Steph, less constantly. He deserved that slap to be honest.

So we’re left with Steph. Steph also does things backwards, meeting Robin first. However, she gets moments with Tim (kind of) before she knows who Tim actually is. So she gets to go to the cinema with him. She gets her birthing classes with him. She gets the evenings sat at her kitchen table chatting about school. She gets him before the absolute shit show that was 2004/5 for Tim Drake. She is more patient than the other girls, either owing to a general lack of self esteem (hence being more willing to put up with long unexplained absences' than the others) or just by nature. At the same time she’s also more likely to tell Tim to belt up when he’s being mopey or secretive or whatever. Tim to be fair makes it pretty clear the ground rules of the relationship - she can’t be in all aspects of his life. Managing expectations and all that.

This fails. Obviously. Bruce is Bruce and uses Stephanie repeatedly to manipulate Tim. And she trusts Bruce. Repeatedly. For reasons. Bad writing. Low self esteem. Desire for approval making her throw out common sense. 

But, here’s why maybe Tim and Steph would one day work again. It’s a minor thing I know, but Tim falls asleep on his girlfriends a lot, as I have shown above. What is Steph’s reaction when he does so?

Sweet dreams then, honey...

She knows him. So she is able to put the pieces together. Zo and Ari were not given that opportunity, so it could be said they couldn’t ever love Tim because they didn’t know him. Tam didn’t even like who Tim was when they broke up. Cassie never really stopped loving Conner. Steph pretty much consistently remained in love with Tim, and vice versa, even after their relationship imploded. It’s a lot easier to forgive your significant other for things like falling asleep over the phone when you know there’s a high chance they were probably out all last night working a case you know? 

Stephanie had the sheer determination (stupidity) to stay around Tim until brick by brick (hoho) she was allowed behind those walls into all aspects of his life (unlike Zo and Ari), and she loved all aspects of Tim, regardless of how... disagreeable those aspects or actions were (Tam).

Flipping over to Tim’s feelings towards the girls... Steph won over Ari because he enjoyed sharing his night life with someone who understood. She was wittier, sharper, and less insecure than Ari. Steph won over Zo because of the omg you’re not dead factor and by this point she was a presence in both Tim and Robin’s lives so was just around him more often. And again, bless her, Zo was kinda dull, especially in comparison to Steph.

Steph didn’t win over Cassie or Tam as such but Tim did make a move on her whilst dating Tam. The problems that had ruined their relationship at the end of the Robin run had been proven moot after she’d shown how much she’d matured. So it’s possible in Tim’s mind, just for that split second on the roof, he thought things could go back to the way they were. Only for Steph to remind him that one of the reasons she had grown so much was because of his absence. And then he had the lovely reminder that Tam existed via engagement announcement.

Finally Lynx... well. He just wanted to bonk there to be honest. Which is fine. If he wasn’t seeing Tam at the same time. 

#TimDrakeStopCheatingOnYourCivilianGirlfriendsChallenge