#i cant wait to learn more these last episodes will go so hard

[librarygf]

also i just keep thinking about the pages of claudia’s diaries torn out and armand’s “louis can sometimes act up. i protect him from himself.” truth and reconciliation, that's the premise of the interview, but the concealment is almost a spotless mind kind of thing. a removal of everything that’s too difficult, a manipulation of facts that makes the story and the way it ends easier to swallow, but at the cost of something. claudia’s real words about her own life, how louis really felt, what actually happened. “she wrote about it and i’d like to read it” “she could dream” “i want this. to remember”

[unknownarmageddon]

thinking about killer having lv episodes. like. I imagine because of his lv, killer gets like, brief things, like migraines that are so bad, they incapacitate him for hours, or pain in his bones, like growth pains but much worse and sharper, which also leaves him handicapped for like a day at the very least

like, its horrid pain and he normally deal with it before by staying home and sleeping it off, but now he cant ride it out in comforf; now he's curling up in the backs of cars he broke into, clutching his skull and trembling so hard, his headache is only made worse by the sound of his bones rattling, and its honestly a bad condition to have in the end of the world but he somehow makes it

now imagine, killer gets used to dealing with it by just curling up somewhere and riding it out

then he winds up with cross and about a month in, he gets a pretty mild episode that lasts about two days, and he definitely flags a bit, randomly stopping to lean against a wall or tree, whatever is available, for a minute or two, then he's alright enough to move along and keep up with cross, thought he does have a bit of a limp

and then it goes past without incident, and then another two or three months go by, and they're a lot more. warm with each other, and killer gets just. he wakes up with the most horrid combination of pain in every bit of his body and there's the worst throbbing in the back of his skull and he just can't fucking move

and cross, a total sweetheart, lightly kicks killer and tells him to get up cuz they need to go, and killer just curls up in a miserable ball and whines for cross to leave him alone and it's so unlike him that cross is like.

"...are you sick?" and killer just gives a watery huff, feeling like total shit and cross finally leaves him alone and killer eventually just passes the fuck out, to cross's alarm, and he's unconcious for like. three days and violently sick for another three, then kinda ill and weak for another two days, and then bounces back and its like.

anyways im not sure where I'm going with that, im exhausted, but the idea of cross holding killer during one of his bad LV episodes and like, idk, trying to soothe him with what little healing magic he has to spare, it has me in a chokehold now

AUGHHH OHH MY GOD WAIT WAIT I love this actually wait

I definitely think this ties back into the whole thing with Killer’s soul already being a bit fucked up cause of the atmosphere and all of the after effects of the bombs and stuff

So THAT whole thing mixed in with the lv spikes like. Yeah. Yeah

And maybe at first Cross like. Doesn’t think too much about it when it happens or it even irritates him at first cause it means they can’t move as fast or killer couldn’t defend himself as easily if he needed to but later when they’re more settled Cross starts to like. Pick up on it. Like he can start telling when it’s happening or when it’s getting worse and he’s kinda learned how to deal with it and how to help and how to minimize Killer just feeling like shit to the best of his ability. And he’s learned to not push Killer to get moving again like he normally would when it’s happening, and to let him be, and he’s learned to like. Look out for him??? Or something??? Cause I’d imagine up until then he’s used to Killer kinda pullin his own weight for the most part

And Killer in turn learns to let cross help him. In a way??? Like it’s weird for both of them. Cause up until then Killer’s done it all himself. He’s rode out the spikes by himself, and now here’s Cross, trying to help or whatever and maybe killer’s stubborn about that at first??? Like shying away from it. Y’know. Like maybe he manages to make half hearted, strained jokes about it. Or something. But he realizes having Cross there’s much better than just suffering in the back of some scrappy car for days and then it’s not so bad

And It maybe like. Scares cross almost?? Like initially. Cause he sees Killer just be so drastically different than he’s used to it’s like. Fuck man is this guy just gonna drop dead any second

ANYWAY IDK what I’m on about that was a lot of just rambling on my part I feel but absolutely so real you’re so right so real

[sskim-milkk]

Ahhhh okay I have SO many thoughts about this week's episode!

BAD BATCH S2 E9 SPOILERS AHEAD

The music in the episode was so, so good! They've been killing it so far with the soundtrack this season, and this week's was no exception

Love the western vibes, not only with the music but the planet too. Also their mission being to go into a mine in the west? Old, Wild, Wild West vibes and I love it!

Hunter's hair blowing in the wind SO MUCH IN THIS EPISODE AHHH SO HOOTTT HNNNGGG

They're all taking Echo's leave so hard :( this does make me wish they'd given his character more development last season. We did get some glimpses of him wanting to help clones and bring down the Empire, but not much. I'm so glad he had his moments to shine this season, I just wish we could've seen more of it last season too.

Poor Omega :( I'm sure she felt very isolated this episode. Everyone doesn't seem to be taking Echo's absence as hard as she is

THE BICKERING oh my goodness! I think this is happening both because of Echo's absence and just the overall mission not going well. The factors were not in their favor. The storm, stampede, the mine not being as rich in ipsium as they thought, the thief nearby. All of it

Poor Hunter trying ever so hard to be the diplomat and keep the peace. He was such a dad in this episode oh my goodness

TECH AND OMEGA YESSSS!!!! Their conversations this episode were just mmmmm so good!! I'm so happy with both of their character development. The fact that it was basically confirmed that Tech is neurodivergent like ahhh I love! It's so important to have this representation in media :)

Omega was able to see another perspective and view point on things and we got to see Tech's side of things. While he probably does miss both Crosshair and Echo, he's learned that he has to adapt to it (there are other people on here that have much better explanations of this than I do. But in short ahhh I just loved it!

Perhaps we will see The Batch leaving Cid this season? We've gotten hints throughout the season and Cid unwillingness to help them at first is definitely another

UGH I CANT BELIEVE I HAVE TO WAIT ANOTHER 5 DAYS FOR THE NEXT EPISODE

I hope they get their ship back! That has Gonky and Lula on there!

[richardsphere]

Still on RWBY catchup. S7E2

an episode Crunchy sumarises as “Arresting people isn’t exactly the best way to make a first impression. However, once the initial shock has worn off, Ruby and her friends learn there’s a lot more to these Ace Ops - and even General Ironwood - than first meets the eye.” More then meets the eye indeed. but not in the way they hope to paint it. Instead of the “petty small-minded despot with big-brotherscreens all over the lower city” he’s instead revealed to be intending to cause a global catastrophy that’ll let atlas conquer the world from a position of relative strength. As it alone flies safe above the ashes. not that i expected much better from the guy who brought an invading army to a celebration of international peace and unity. I cant believe this is the guy that has a significant percentage of the FNDM claim “He was right all along”. I cant wait to see how RT screwed this premise up enough to make people actually believe he’s the “real hero of the story”. ------------ (i took a break mid writing this to continue watching the episode. Ruby just repeated Ozpins lie about them being out of questions. I see now that this is probably going to be the reason why the FNDM elements think James is the “real hero”isnt it, because they misinterpret “keeping an actual panopticon out of hands of a self-admitted wannabe global dictator” to be the same as Ozpins refusal to trust even those who have earned his trust while denying them mission-critical information such as the relic’s ability to attract Grimm.  I stand by ruby’s decision to lie to Ironwood, same as I stand in horror at how horribly OOC I just know the entire cast is going to be forced to become as the production inevitably forces them support “operation eradicate 90% of the human population” for the sake of the plot. ------- Ah, Ironwood returning the Panopticon to Ruby as a “show of trust”, an act that i can just tell will be used by bad faith elements to prove that James was an honourable man compared to Ruby’s deceptions, an act i also 100% dont believe he would’ve done if he’d known there were questions left to ask. ----- one last talk by Mr Stache and Scorpio about how the lower city is getting neglected before the episode ends leaves me fearfull that the crew that has openly acknowledged they couldnt handle the sensitive topic of race relations, is now trying to tackle class/income inequality on top of Fascism and Authoritarianism. ---- So hereby take at the end of the Atlas Arc Introduction: RT, Please stop grappling with difficult subject matters in this show. You know from experience you dont have the skills to do it respectfully. I cant believe such a likeable cast of characters can exist in a series this terribly written, but i am getting closer and closer to the seemingly inevitable conclusion that S9 will lead me to permanently abandon this series because it cant stop tackling difficult topics wihtout the skills or respect needed of the task. Im even starting to struggle to believe that RT could possibly be as incompetent as it claims to be, as the sheer consistency of its mistakes leads me to suspect them of actual willfull malice. Obviously there are 2 seasons of missed content left, and it could be feasible that the series succeeds in at least making the arc convincing, but i somehow highly doubt it. (but then again, im admittedly a massive pesimist) but then the RWBY Die-hards will inevitably claim “you cant judge a series until its complete”, and they’ll keep claiming that until the series is complete. Not until a chapter or season is complete, as long as there is space left to make another chapter they’ll claim no one is allowed to critique anything.

[pwblogarchive]

April 2006

April 6, 2006

hindsight is always 20/20 - in retrospect:

stitch was one of my favorite cartoon characters ever.

the teeth, the extra arms, the meanness.

and always with the best intentions.

thats all.

- petey

4/08/06 Q&A

question

What is the one song you did not write that you wish you had?

answer

young turks by rod stewart - for real.

question

are you going to on one tree hill alot now?if you are you could be asked to be in movies and get to busy with all of that and then end up leaving your band.

answer

no- theres nothing but fob for a long time now.

question

Hey Pete ive been hearing alot of rumors about Fall Out Boy touring with The Academy Is & Panic at the Disco and I was wondering if it was true? and when? because if it is im totally there;^D

answer

we will be touring the uk with the academy later this spring. we are doing reading and leeds with patd- and for those over here in america- keep your eyes peeled because its gonna be secret-

question

Last year you pulled out of reading and leeds now your only playing reading, i live in leeds and am very upset. WHY WHY WHY???

answer

dear angry, we are playing reading and leeds. i am not sure why they haven’t announced the leeds date. please send this angry letter to that person and just come have a good time with us at the show.

question

Pete, waz up? so ya how u like one tree hill, i think ur totally awesome on that show and i hope u stay for a while, how long r u on it?

answer

the cast was absolutely amazing. but i wont be on anymore episodes. i feel like we need to concentrate on fob right now. we all have fun doing other stuff. but my best adventures ever have beenw ith fob and thats where i want to be.

question

I Havent Heard From You In A While. Hows Your Life Been?

answer

up and down. been writing alot lately. tired. but smiling. i love being on tour- i am pretty homesick right now. getting ready to record a new record this summer. i miss roxy and bonnie jane. how are you

question

pete your such a freakin perv my god who talks pictures of them selves naked i guess really desprite guys yuo are GROSS next thing we know you video taped your self doin g it and it got stolen too i dont love you any more

answer

hahahaha. i dunno how to respond. im a dirty regular “desprite” boy- the truth is- go listen to fuct- i told you everything about me on it. i cant help it- go “brook yourself”- ooh classic burn- kinda on myself mostly.

question

Im proud of fall out boy and how successful you guys have gotten.

answer

thank you very much. i wish you werent anonymous cause this one meant alot when i read it

question

pete,ur hilarious.where did that come from?

answer

my daddys zygote- i think. maybe some of you in sex ed could correct me.

question

where can i get tickets for the 2006 Nintendo Fusion Tour if they are on sale if not when will they be on sale

answer

i dont know. we aren’t on that tour.

question

Okay so i was wondering …If p!atd are nice to thier fans cause i know theyre on tour and all and its really hard not to be bitchy,but from what ive heard brendon and brent are jackasses and i know not to believe every thing i hear but are they nice with some really horrible days that just make them seem like theyre bitchy?or are they just bitchy? xoxox courtney

answer

please dont believe what you hear or read on the internet. there is no iq test to go on the internet so unfortunately people can write whatever they want. ive learned from experience. wait until you meet us to pass judgment on how we behave- patd are really good kids i promise you. i wouldn’t work with them if they werent.

question

thankyou for writing all your words and lyrics, they comfort me and make me realize that Im not the only one who feels what I feel. your lyrics are as if you felt the exact same way but worded it beautifully.thank you so much from the bottom of my broken heart.

answer

thanks. that is how the writers i read every single night make me feel. you made my day a bit better. just saying.

question

cheez-its or cheese nips?

answer

cheez-its - nips are total ripoffs. they suck. cheez-its are like new york while cheese nips are like hoops. come on now.

question

First off, may I compliment the genius of this band. i must. my question: will Clandestine publish any non-Pete-Wentz books in the future, or are they limited to just your books?

answer

id love to publish a book of someone else wrote… its got to be words i love though…. we’ve got some things in the works.

question

Dear Pete, I know that tons of girls adore you and go crazy for you, but have you ever encountered gay guys going crazy for you?

answer

i think more boys like me than girls. i think its because i come off pretty flamboyantly.

question

what is the last song you listened to?

answer

dont be long by jaz and the notes.

question

at the albany show at the pepsi, i heard that four people died, is this true? and if it is, how did they die?

answer

tyson ritter was so handsome that they broke their eyes and their hearts stopped. actually wait nobody died.

question

go to quizilla .com search patrick stump and theres this gross story about patrick………..um….yeah

answer

patrick doesnt do gross things. his body is made up of kittens, saturdays, 70 degree weather, first kisses and butterflies. trust me, i cut that bitch open once to check.

question

How do you keep track of your journals? Id lose my head if it wasnt connected. Whats your favorite song that you have written so far? “I read your lyrics like a book, I never get tired of the same sad story.”

answer

well in the foe.com, i realize that people are going to respond so i try to write things where people will be opinionated, fbr i write things that are a bit more abstract, fob one i try and use in an informative way because i know the most people will read, and the livejournal existed for one person and them alone- and they stopped being interested in reading it. - and there is not a single thing i have written that i feel is worth remembering years later- but i am striving towards writing something that will change my mind.

question

Wat iz wrong with u took my word i did not spend the last 2 years watchin Family Guy,so u culd steal my word!!!.Dood ur a bad person!! y do ppl say ur hott ur just a “Bastard”. thatz my word!!

answer

ding ding ding. cue the balloons. this is definitely the funniest question of the week, though im not sure it was intentional. tears in my eyes. step up on the platform and make your speech:

April 18, 2006

“from 36,000 feet above the earth:”

wahahahaha. the boys in the bled made a pretty hilarious parady of my sidekick debacle. look around you can find it im sure. i got a trick or two up my sleeve to make you laugh at me even more than you can make me laugh at me. get ready. its gonna be big.

speaking of we have a couple of big magazine stories coming out soon hopefully they will not cover the same couple stories that tend to get focused on. some of the journalists seemed to go a bit deeper so who knows?

charlie is out next to me. snoring. i want to draw a bomb in his mouth and get him in trouble with the airline. that sounds a bit crazybrains though.

keep it up over at TRL. its amazing that a video that feels so out of place there amongst all the pretty people is sticking around. thats right i said we we'ren't pretty. sorry. i wasn't counting patrick. but technically he is handsome, not pretty- just in case you're keeping score.

laughtrack.

i cant wait to see my dogs and go home for one minute before milwaukee. i know my boy dog is gonna wake up and try to hang out but be way too confused to know whats going on. good times.

roll the credits.

love, the fancy kid

currently reading: the green hills of africa

currently watching: the squid and the whale

currently wishing i was: you

posted by: PETERputyourPANtson

4/18/06 Q&A

question

I was on “your myspace” . and it says your dating a girl named autumn and shes pregnet with your kid and its due in 8 months, is this true?

answer

totally. file this under: i do not have a myspace. how much you wanna bet that some people read the totally and didn’t even read the rest?

question

hey so i just read your interview from absolutepunk.net and it says that you are ready to move out of your parents house and possibly somewhere new. I always thought that the reason you stayed in wilmett was because bands that move to big citys can loose that feel to their music? Is this true that you could move to LA?? I really hope if di that you still drive your sisters purple escort and stay the same old peter because thats what makes you amazing

answer

trust me, i was alot more amazing when i rode a powder blue girls predator bike. you would have asked me for a zillion autographs back then.

question

what happened to the Clandestine wallet?

answer

i hated how the sample looked so it went back to the elves in the factory. it should be done in the next month or so. (the very first part and the very last part of the answer was true- not the middle. wed never trust those damn elves again).

question

My friends have decided that every true rock fan can be divided into two catagories. Someone is either a Korn fan or a Slipknot fan. Which are you?

answer

uh.

question

Peter, Peter, People eater… i just want to thank you for your bad fashion. because of you horrible sense in style you have inspired me to give fashion another try… so thanks again on helping me find my dream when i thought all hope was lost for it…

answer

hahaha. thanks i guess. clash away.

question

i love the song i slept with someone in fall out boy and all i got was this stupid song writen about me…so did u actually sleep with someone in fall out boy?? Who??

answer

did i sleep with someone in fall out boy? no way! those dudes are sell outz! once i fell asleep watching weekend at bernies two cause it was so boring. its no captain ron.

question

Im going to the UIC pavillion concert and i was just wondering if you had to have a pass or anything to get into the meet and greet or if its for every1, b/c i relllly wanna mee you guys

answer

we do meet and greets every night- it depends on the night how many kids and who get in- after the show if we dont leave right away, do interviews or have to watch out for curfew we try and meet kids waiting around. it all depends. we do our best.

question

Fall Out Boy performing at a Sox game? Whhhat?! Two of my favorite things in the world and Im not going, because I dont have tickets Wednesday. *Cries*. National league huh? So you might be doing something involving that other Chicago team whos name I wont mention for I fear I might gag. You should consider giving us more notice next time so I can come. Mhmm.

answer

they asked us to play yesterday. they should consider giving us more notice. Haha.

question

how good is petes and pats friendship??? Just wondering

answer

good enough to know that he would lose his crackers if he heard you call him pat.- just kidding. he is like lays potato chips. i blah blah blah (forgot the slogan that goes with it) cant stop eatin em or something.

question

Pete I would give anything to play mini golf with you. Plus im legal way legal five seven three six eight six three zero five five

answer

i typed your number into my code and it did not make my robot butler bring me a peanutbutter and honey sandwich. you are fucking fired. but i do love minigolf. me and joe would destroy you at it.

question

Pete, is it true that you are mormon? We saw you here at the show in Utah and have been debating it ever since…

answer

no i am not a mormon. i try my best to be respectful of everyones beliefs.

question

Whats up with the red arm bands in the Saturday video?

answer

le revelucion has begun. get your mustaches. prepare to take to the streets.

question

me and other boardies want to know if you could fund an all boardie school just for us?

answer

so you could sit around and write about how i smell like poop and i taste like poop and look like poop. then we could teach microsoft paint and you could draw me with super extra big teeth and my big dumb head. i think ill pass. see me after class, troublemaker.

question

peter, what did you get for easter? Serisouly.

answer

two plane trips and a headache.

question

How are you today?

answer

sunny and 65

question

I cant wait to see you guys on SNL this Saturday feel free to shout out my name (Lindsey Webber). haha. i love you guys!

answer

its a re-run but you could stick a sticky note on your tv that is a speech bubble coming out of my mouth (ill be on stage left, in case you are trying to figure out where to stick the note).

question

Pete, What was it like Being on one tree hill? That was how i found out about Fall Out Boy…You Guys ROCK!!!

answer

i loved the cast they were amazing. i got to be close friends with some of them- there are somethings about it i wish had gone a bit differently but over all it was an a great learning experience. mark schwan is a rad dude.

question

Pete, Why do you go offstage to change, when everyone had already seen you naked?

answer

your parents and doctors saw you naked does that mean you walk around your house naked and go to the doctors office naked? cause thatd be pretty weird dude. im just sayin…

question

why didnt you guys hang around after the show at chain reaction? do you have to be an OCK now to meet you guys at shows?

answer

because we wanted the show to be about our friends in the hushsound, not us.

question

Hey Pete, so, when can we can expect the new record to come out? Can you give us any information about it?

answer

late fall- info- there will be at least three love songs on it.

April 29, 2006

im pretty much just a lawyer with the way im always trying to get you off

i dont mean to have you worried or troubled. its the last thing i want. never take anything i ever say too seriously. youd need a search party to track my moods. who knows where they went? i guess this doesnt make sense. but in some strange way this is me saying thank you for always being there on the other side of this monitor.

i am watching reality bites right now.

the most exceptional thing about you is how ordinary you believe you are.

i want to be kept.

i am a bull.

she is a china shop.

Posted by xoat 2:24 AM

[leejihoonownsmyheart]

noooo i havent seen that anime yettt i think i will sjnskms👀

HELP NO I DID SAY ITS P FAR AWAY BY NORMAL STANDARDS I JUST LIKE TO THINK ABOUT MYSELF A LOT😭😭 i twin w beomgyu >.<

SPEAKING OF BEOMGYU i was listening to coming back for more like two days ago and all i could think of was OMG THIS IS SOOOO JEONGHAN AND YN i think i need help rip

math is sooooo so hard it makes me vomit like,,

ive been ignoring it for the past few days rip and thats got my mom so worried i feel so guilty,,,,, but also😭 i love math i cannot live without math i literally ignore every other subject in favour of practicing math all day every day (which is also super harmful-) BUT ENOUGH ABOUT THIS

and no i was talking about a series called once upon a broken heart the mmc is so unhinged and such a sadist most of my annotations of that series look like, 'pathetic jeonghan?' 'pathetic jeonghan would totally do this' ' THIS IS SOO PATHETIC JEONGHAN??'

!!!if youre into angst you should def read it the second book is going to rip you soul to shreds and im not even kidding i love it soo much

IRRELEVANT BUT theres a book releasing in like two days omg and im sooo excited bec 1) its the last part 2) its like a cannon crossover w another series which i used to be obsessed w by the same author i love crossovers i just love dimension travel (?) man

ARE YOU WATCHING PERCY JACKSONNN I LOVE IT SOO MUCHHH CANT BELIEVE S1 WILL BE OVER THIS WEEK?? the eps end before they even start eng shows are soo short its so annoying like?? eight eps?? 30 mins per ep??? thats hardly a quarter of a regular kdrama girlie be fr😭😭

help i havent really thought about it i dont think im not anal much?? 👀 (maybe a lot of sickly sweet fluff too) LET ME THINK ABOUT IT WILL GET BACK TO YOU !!

tbh ive been trying to find good joshua x jeonghan smut + fic but i never seem to be able to TT ive given up atp,, like its mostly non idol au and ESTABLISHED RELATIONSHIP TROPE (LIKE THATS SUCH A HUGE TURN OFF FOR ME FOR SOME REASON) like give me yearning give me pining give me savagery give me tears sigh

i woke up so pissed today because isnt it just so annoying when you think youre finally over your highschool crush and then she invades your dreams looking ridiculously hot smh like i PHYSICALLY felt my heart pound in my sleep ive been able to think only about her all day long its driving me crazy and this is tmi i think💀

OMG WHAT ABOUT 🎀 or 💥 or 💫 WHICHEVER YOU THINK SUITS ME BETTER YOU DECIDE !!!

also im almost 20 hehe youre only like four years older than me 👀

Tell me if you dooo watch it i’m actually super into it right now

BEOMGYU TWIN- I AM SOOBIN TWIN. WE SHOULD PUT TOGETHER A GROUP OF TXT BIRTHDAY TWINS AND JUST DO DANCE AND SONG COVERS OF ALL THEIR SONGS FOR ATTENTION AND LIKE MOVE INTO A HPUSE TOGETHER AND RECREATE ALL OF THEIR TIKTOKS AND MVS AND INSTAGRAM POSTS HOW FUNNY WOULD THAT BE

NO IT IS WHEN THAT SONG CAME OUT I WAS LIKE this is theirs. ITS SO THEM.

Learning very interesting things about you…. Math is hard… but loves math….

ILL CHECK OUT THAT BOOK SERIES IF I REMEMBER IT SOUNDS RIGHT UP MY ALLEY

HAVE YOU READ THAT BOOK THAT JUST RELEASED YET?! IS IT GOOD?! WORTH THE WAIT?!

I AM WATCHING PJO I FANT BELIEVE ITS ALREADY OVER?! I DO STILL HAVE THREE EPISODES TO WATCH THOUGH IM SO SCARED OF SPOILERS I CANT EVEN GET IN TIKTOK 😭

noted noted noted… prefer yearning…

THAT IS SO ANNOYING IM SO SORRY YOU WOKE UP TO THAT. Thinking that you moved on only to find out you DIDNT i would be so stressed… crushes are… stressful….

[buffalowingsfortwo]

11/15/23 9:07 pm

ash to faith

we havent written each other in a while, but it felt necessary to capture the feelings i am having now while i am so aware of them, and leave them here for you. this is equal parts a filler episode, and some of the most important words i will tell you.

i just saw a video of a girl going through an old notebook she found of letters going between her and her deceased childhood best friend. it made me think of us, despite the fact that we did not invent this. i do not know for certain, but i trust that love letters were the first and will be the last record of any lived human experience.

this will potentially be my most formal love letter to you. the rest just lack the official title.

as ive gone through life, ive given many people the title of best friend, or lover, or favorite, or soulmate. and none of them have come close to you. i apologize for the dramatics, but it does all come back to you. you have always been there to hold my hand while i cry, you have listened to every rambling story, you have experienced life with me in the most up-close, personal ways possible. you taught me how to do makeup and how to not take life so seriously. you showed me how to be strong, how to be wise, and more than anything else, how to be kind. i am still working on these, and i can only dream to reach your levels. i admire everything about you, constantly learning from and with you. this life has not been an easy one, but i wouldnt trade it for anything, as it brought me to you. though, that being said, i know that i will find you in every life. its hard to imagine that any of them could feel better than this. maybe they all feel the same. every day, i love you more than the last, and less than the next. and i always think to myself, "there is no room to hold more love for her than i do now", and every time, without fail, you prove me wrong. even at our worst. it is you and me.

thank you for being my friend. for giving me as many chances as you have. for living by my side, even when you are not there physically. we are always together, and always will be, regardless of where life takes us. i cant wait to see where we go.

my faith, we were girls together. may we always be.

"id be appalled if i saw you ever try to be a saint, i wouldnt fall for someone i thought couldnt misbehave, but i want you to know that ive had no love like your love"

-nobody by hozier

[myloveforhergoeson]

hey there! i was wondering - how have you already written such a LONG fic in only so few chapters? did you extensively plan this story ahead of time? make a beat sheet? please reveal your writerly ways 🙏 i struggle even reaching a decent word count for a single chapter 😭

hi!! oh my gosh thank you so much for your question!!! the first question about that's all she wrote ever!!! i have kind of a long answer for you; please find it under the cut

so, the idea for thats all she wrote came to me in november of 2021, and that was the first month that i ended up putting words on a google doc and creating roxy as a character. until a few months ago, this fic was just a silly little thing i could write in my free time so i had accumulated quite a few chapters just from writing whenever i felt like it! i never actually intended for this to be something i published until i had a friend who wanted to publish their own fic in a different fandom and we thought it would be fun to do together. so, i haven't actually written 75k words since the beginning of march, i've been slowly chugging along since the end of november 2021. as of now, since i've seriously began to write to make sure i can meet my every two week posting mark, i'm now writing the very last chapter of the first season - so I've got 17 full chapters written and i'm about 1/4 of the way through the last one (which i'll probably have to split up bc its already super long)

as for the extensive story planning... that is certainly one way to put it. i'm pretty acquainted with the first two seasons of the show, so as i remembered more and more plot points that happened i would just figure how to fix roxy into them and write it down in my notes app. i had major milestones (a plot point in the 7th chapter i cant spoil, a plot point for the dance episode i can't spoil, when she gets together with james... all the way until the end of the big time movie!!) in my head and worked from there. if i knew a major plot point was coming up, i did my best to kind of build the story around that as well as the main plot of the episode. it's kind of hard to explain, but yeah extensive story planning in the way that this story lives in my mind rent free and i love the little character i have made. it's kind of like a beat sheet, but it mostly lives in my brain. honestly, the worst part is writing something in my ideas note and then coming back to it like three months later and having no idea what i meant - for instance i'm trying to figure out what "Mona Lisa, when the world comes down aar finale, obvious westlife" means right now... probably something about the title of the chapter, but maybe i meant i wanted her to play mona lisa by the all american rejects on her guitar... maybe she was listening to obvious by westlife bc she loves '90s boybands... i don't know... we'll have to wait a few chapters to figure it out

when it comes to word count, i don't really have a goal or a cap, but most of the story is already written for me - i do follow most of the main plot and dialogue, just adding in spaces for roxy to exist both on her own as a character and in relation to her band :) a lot of the gags in the show are visual too, so i have to take extra time to make sure i'm able to write that out. plus, the world they live in isn't really fleshed out in the show and that drives me CRAZY, so i like to put my own spin on what i think different parts of the palm woods or rocque records look like... in the 7th chapter i think i went a bit crazy and invented the entire plot of the varsity vampire movies... plus i have little scenes that i either wanted to include in the episode from the get go so the readers can learn more about roxy and her thoughts/feelings about her crazy new life or that i just thought would fit within the episode. i'm really trying my best to give her her own character plot lines and motivations outside of the band, especially outside of james, to make sure she's just as fleshed out as the guys characters are!

tl;dr: i've had literal years sitting on this fic and lots and lots and lots of time to think about how i want it! if you have any more questions/comments/one-shot ideas please do not hesitate to send them my way :)) thanks for your support, i hope you'll like what i've got coming up!

[samdyke]

top 5 scenes/episodes/arcs that deserved horriblebreakdownnatural go!

OKAY MICKEY I DID THINK ABT THIS A LOT and these are Not in any particular order but i have thoughts SO (below the cut bc its long)

1. sometime in s2 (after having met max for sure like seeing his powers be used for something violent & learning he also has psychokinetic abilities) sam shouldve had a full meltdown about his powers this is a PRIVATE MELTDOWN he goes to the woods or smth in the middle of the night and just loses it. full screaming at the sky “what the FUCK is HAPPENING TO ME” yes his psychic abilities would act up during this display and he would cause like. a crop circle or knock over trees and that would freak him out even more so hes like crying and trying to calm down because he’s terrified of what will happen if he Doesnt calm himself down. there’s a lot of choking down tears here because he just wants to be fucking normal, he tried so hard, and he has no idea what the hell is inside of him. he slips back into the motel before sunrise and dean never finds out about this one. like this post was Correct

2. okay this is SIMILAR but not the same hear me out. PRE swan song, as in the night between dean agreeing that sam can say yes and try to fling himself into the pit and it actually happening, sam shouldve been able to fully lose it. because holy fuck???? what the goddamn fuck is this? this breakdown potentially all happens at bobby’s house once again alone - he goes out to the scrapyard and looks up at the sky and prays to god to help him, asks why this is happening to him, why god wont do anything. please. please. there is, of course, no answer. this is sam’s last night as sam, and if things go well he’ll spend the rest of eternity locked in hell with lucifer; i think he’s entitled to a little screaming and crying and desperation

3. i gotta say like. fitz was right on the money with a post soul-fixed sam dean having a complete and utter meltdown like this. its just like......sam couldnt process for so long and dean was absolutely repressing everything for the year he lived with lisa and ben and to truthfully recognize what sam went through and everything.....horriblebreakdownatural MUST include both of them having a very late night hazy crying fit because once DEAN starts crying about how he never shouldve done it he shouldve said yes to michael or found another way sammy oh god you were so good im ao sorry you did it but i shouldve protected you i shouldve protected you then sam would also cry i think. they need this. its catharsis

4. i personally think dean should have had a breakdown after learning that mary was a hunter. not then and there in the past because goddamn no time (hah), but there’s no fucking way he would’ve been able to cope with thee mother mary, angelic perfect figment of comfort and home, the pure martyr for whom his entire life was ruined, was actually. a killer. a hunter. and she hated it. i think maybe he would be telling sam about it and it would hit suddenly and he would just feel sick, this is the kind of breakdown where you’re throwing up bile and you cant catch your breath and maybe youre crying?? but thats not the point its the absolute crushing weight and sickness when you learn that someyhing in your life has irrevocably changed in the worst way

5. cry harder repression boy: i want that tearful horrible painful breakdown from dean that we were all waiting for after despair. when he processes what cas said? and what that MEANS? oh i wanted the full breakdown here. this isnt something he can drink away because cas is fucking DEAD and cas loved him, he’s deaf Because he loved dean, like. i think that it would be jack asking where cas was that would actually seal this particular breakdown deal and dean would have to flee to go privately lose his shit which is of course not that private. think a prayer like purgatory 2.0 but 20x more desperate, which turns into threatening chuck because rage is the natural companion to grief

honorable mentions: sam after expelling gadreel (this would be horrible. imagining sam sobbing about killing kevin is genuinely making me ill), dean after leaving cas in purgatory (a prayer that turns to desperate painful screaming at the sky which sam hears but they never talk about), dean after getting cas BACK from purgatory (to cas), sam learning that he’s lucifer’s true vessel, at some point i think dean or sam shouldve had a car meltdown (u know screaming at the top of your lungs while barelling down the highway, crying, lots of obscenities).....theres def more but these simply came to mind. feel free to share w me your epic horriblebreakdownatural moment suggestions

[dorky-thighchi]

WHAT I LOVE ABOUT DAISUGA AND CANON MOMENTS

Let’s appreciate these two for leading the team to the nationals (long post ahead)

1. Their goals and hard work for the team:

They’re always shown together planning for the team. When Asahi stopped playing volleyball, Noya got suspended, former coach Ukai stopped coaching. I felt bad for these two, they went through hard times as their captain and vice captain it’s their obligation to unite and guide the team. During their first year and second year they were used to failure and called flightless crows. Their expectations crumpled but they did not give up. It’s Daichi and Suga’s job to bring back the name of Karasuno to the nationals with the help of coach Ukai and Takeda, finally they made it to nationals, that’s why their former captain was so proud of them because they followed his words. When they didn't have their coach yet, they behaved as Karasuno’s temporary coaches (thank goodness Takeda’s an angel). Daichi was shown coaching the team in the first few episodes and Suga helped Tanaka bond Kageyama and Hinata. Suga questioned Daichi’s plan about the weird duo (Daichi’s a matchmaker) but after what Daichi said he helped the two bond and honed their skills.

In the HQ light novel “Melancholy of the third year student”, Asahi stated “with Sawamura leading the team and Sugawara taking care of the members, what could i possibly do to contribute” he witnessed Daichi and Suga walking together in the hallway; Asahi was impressed because of their dedication to guide the team to the nationals despite they’re in college prep class still they gave their best in guiding the team. Tanaka also acknowledged his senpais hard work that’s why he extremely respects his senpais, he was always there supporting the two. Coach Ukai madly respects Suga because he gave his setter position to Kageyama for the sake of the team and Daichi because he’s the best in motivating the team. 

2. They know each other so well: 

Daichi has this proud mode when he talks about Suga. When he told the team that Suga’s an experienced setter he had this “Yes that’s my amazing setter” face and when Suga did that amazing spike he jumped like a kid. In the HQ light novel “Sugawara’s decision” this happened during the first training camp. Suga was anxious to tell Daichi of his plan to give his setter position to Kageyama. When Suga finally told Ukai about his decision, Daichi and Asahi overheard their conversation and promised to win any match as much as they can. When Suga stated “I think in order to win, the person we need right now is Kageyama” Daichi and Asahi expressed their concern because the three promised to step on the court together (i get so emotional when the 3rd yrs play together). Daichi was worried and he told Suga that they can do something about it. THIS IS ACTUALLY ONE OF MY FAVORITE HQ LNs because of what Suga thought after their discussion “He was glad to have sawamura who accepted him the way he is, as his teammate” AND I FUCKIN LOST IT HQ LN SHOULD BE ANIMATED. Daichi supported Suga’s decision for the team, “Daichi was very certain of Suga who had been with him for the past 3 years”, he even stopped Tanaka from interrupting Suga’s monologue telling him to listen. 

Remember when Ukai announced the first lineup for dateko vs karasuno match and the shot was focused to Suga and back to Daichi; you can see Daichi did this weird eye thing glancing at Suga. Daichi’s proud moments of Suga were “I think you’ve revived too Suga” and “I’m glad you still want to fight” when he told Daichi “I do wish my tosses could’ve played a part in the victory”. When Asahi and Noya stopped coming to the team, the only members left were Suga, Daichi and the 2nd years. Suga also took the blame and Daichi was there for him. He was shown secretly listening to Yamaguchi and Suga’s conversation about the mop (and comforted him that he shouldn't blame himself. I’m kinda disappointed they didn't include this in the anime). These panels show their trust and respect for each other.

He cant even dare to hurt Suga (but lets Suga punch him anytime) and he knows when Suga goes to overthinking mode. Also Suga knows Daichi so well i think i’m gonna cry. Scolding Daichi when he was not vocal during the game; Suga’s known for being the only one who can lecture Daichi. When Daichi told Suga and Asahi that it’s better to hand over the team to the 2nd yrs, Suga knew Daichi didn't mean that; Daichi felt hopeless because they lost again. He knew Daichi wanted to stay and play volleyball and step on the orange court. 

He’s also used to Daichi’s stern mode. Daichi was also shown being the one who can keep Suga in control like “Suga please calm down”. Their relationship isn’t fully conveyed in the anime but i’m thankful that creators created drama cds, light novels, extras, spin-offs and haikyuu stage play to let us know more about the characters.

 3. The team parents: 

They always discuss about their team members like Suga asking Daichi about Kageyama and Hinata (kagehina bond ep) and Tsukishima. In the haikyuu drama cds “what if karasuno’s manager isn’t shimizu kiyoko” and “the reason behind the t-shirts” they were worried about entrusting the manager’s job to Tanaka, Noya and Hinata. When the team was hungry because Kiyoko wasn’t there, Suga told Daichi to take action so he assigned the weird duo to buy foods for the team and they were the ones who planned for the names of the shirts with the help of Noya, Kiyoko was pissed at the two because they were busy thinking of their own shirts. In the haikyuu light novel “the last summer vacation” (Sources: 1|2) Suga watched the team with worry on his face because it was so hot so he approached Daichi and expressed his concern that the team will get sick from the heat. Coach Ukai overheard the discussion and called a meeting. They’re usually seen together in every scene in the anime, stage play, haikyuu light novel, extras, manga, spin-offs and drama cds, scolding Tanaka, Noya, Hinata, Kageyama and Tsukishima; discussing volleyball stuffs; and buying pork buns for the team. In the lets haikyuu and extras (hq spin-off) it’s actually semi-canon they’re karasuno’s team parents. They also have this karasuno christmas bonding tradition.

It was also STATED BY THE DIRECTOR IN THE HQ MAGAZINE AND THE VOICE ACTORS THAT DAICHI AND SUGA ARE THE TEAM PARENTS AND TANAKA’S THE BIG BROTHER (here are the links: 1| 2|3) 

IT’S CANON!!!!!! IT’S DAMN RIGHT CANON!!!!!TEAM PARENTS DAISUGA IS CANON!!!!!!

 4. Teasing, bickering and just them being dorks: 

Suga teasing daichi is my jam. In the HQ LN “Yachi’s delivery mission” (Sources 1|2), this conversation frickin made me squeal like a mouse with laryngitis. After practice the team was thirsty and wanted something cold to eat. “It’s indeed hot, lets get ice pops before we head home” daichi stated then frickin SLY/LIL SHIT SUGA JUST CASUALLY SAID THIS REMARK “Oh that’s not a bad idea, are you going to treat us Daichi-san” HE FRICKIN ADDED -SAN. So the team didn't let the opportunity go away they screamed with joy and thanked Daichi. After what happened Daichi just glared at Suga who was smiling at him. Daichi’s a softie when Suga’s involved. Suga got Daichi to buy ice cream for the team.  I REPEAT HQ LN SHOULD BE ANIMATED. 

Daichi knows when Suga’s about to do something stupid and his antics. They argued about this. When Suga was mad at Daichi because he was implying that the last year shrine visit was nothing; he was so pissed he started fuming at daichi. Suga also told Daichi that steak just being steak is better over diced steak.  Hyped suga and daichi trying to calm him down is the cutest shit. In the HQ LN “Tokyo Expedition: Captains’ Meeting”(Sources: 1|2), Daichi warned Suga about Kuroo because he knows how to read minds and loves mind games and Suga was like ‘you need to chill Daichi’. When it was Suga’s turn to pick a card from Daichi’s deck he picked the joker and twitched his brows, Daichi whispered at Suga telling him whenever he drew the joker his brows twitch so Suga massaged his brows. I REPEAT AGAIN THIS SHOULD BE ANIMATED. The other captains and vice captains are competing against each other but look at these frickin idiots they are helping each other. DAICHI OBSERVING SUGA THEN WARNED HIM ABOUT HIS TENDENCY OF TWITCHING HIS EYEBROWS. IM GONNA FRICKIN DO A BACKFLIP. Also Daichi and Suga love to make fun of asahi but when you frickin hurt asahi these two will frickin punch you in the face. Frickin daisugasting dorks.

 5. They are always together and in sync:

In the manga, anime, extras, stage play, light novel, drama cds and official art/merchandise they’re usually frickin together and always in sync, same reactions and thoughts. Remember when Daichi looked at Suga (S1 ep24) like he was asking for approval then Suga nodded. That was so cute ugh.

Extras: 

Suga is 6 months older than Daichi. June 13 and December 31. Their birth dates makes me go WAIT WHAT. 

Suga and Daichi’s name meanings are compatible.

During the christmas bonding time, Suga received daichi’s gift, a daruma. Daichi bought it as a gift because it weighs like a volleyball (he’s such a volleyball nerd) and he told Suga that they should draw the eye together. (Source link)

Suga thought that Daichi was jealous of his t-shirt because the phrase on his shirt was cooler than his. (Source link)

Suga’s first synchronize attack was a success and he tossed it to Daichi. Coach Ukai assigned these two along with Tanaka to learn synchronize attack.(Remember when Daichi told Suga he borrowed coach ukai’s tablet so they can watch the videos together)

The way they look at each other like there’s nothing else to look at. 

What I truly love about these two is their relationship and trust for each other.They complement each other, which makes them a good combination. They went through obstacles and look THEY MADE IT TO THE NATIONALS, kiyoko witnessed their progress and asahi thanked suga and daichi because they welcomed him again in the team, remember when asahi was not sure if they’d accept him to the team but daichi and suga were just laughing and made fun of him. 

Their vice captain and captain interaction isn't fully expressed in the anime and i hope that everyone will appreciate them more! They made it to nationals! And them being proud of Hinata and Kageyama in the hq time skip is one of the best treasures Furudate sensei gave to us. 

Lets talk about these two. Daisugasting volleyball idiots. 

I rest my case.

[organic-guacamole]

episode 209 spoilers below

I'm so late today but here it is

I love EJ, he's finally learning to be happy. I'm so proud.

Ms Jenn = every boomer during zoom calls, like jeez yes we can hear you stop shouting at me.

LOVE THE SUBTLE JOKE ABOUT QUARANTINE "these dark times" "you mean spring break?"

ah yes, remember when we thought covid was just gonna give us a longer spring break? good times

SEBLOS

damn the passive aggressiveness from Carlos and the absolutely over it tone from seb✋

CASWELL COUSINS!!!!! THEY'RE THE BEST!!!!

we needed more if this kind of goofiness for the first part of season 2 that only such an iconic duo can provide.

old old movies-

is it even that old, or is Nini being a gen alpha rn-

i choose to imagine EJ being scared of the movie and hiding in Ashlyn's shoulder while she keeps a straight face and then EJ pretending to be tough afterwards

aww redlyn are soulmates.... yknow, if gingers had souls

(please ignore me)

y'all saw how EJ's face *lit up* when Gina logged on? how dare you tell me he doesn't like her

ofc she's no damsel in distress, she's Gina porter, she's amazing.

so do we think she'd be the type to just glare at suspicious people? or bark at them

do they not know that Rini broke up? or is Ms Jenn just wanting Nini to suffer through her heartbreak to make her a better actress....

speaking of, why is Nini in the call? she's not in the show anymore. Unless she is, even after the rose and the song got cut, which would be so unfair to all those that auditioned properly before she even came back but whatever, she's the main character I get it 🙄

big red is a hero honestly, Nini better thank him for changing the subject like that

I can't-

i won't work you over the break-

this woman would 100% work her kids 24/7 if it was legal and idk how to feel about it.

YES GINA USE THAT CHARM

QUEEN

FRENCH QUEEN

SHE LEARNT FROM THE BEST (antoine obvi)

smh the airport lady, eavesdropping on Gina's call.

The way she was so happy to answer EJ's call, "eej"

I love them your honour.

EJ WITH PAINTED NAILS YES PLEASE

great now we need to see Gina, Ashlyn and EJ having a complete spa day and EJ getting really into it and Gina and Ashlyn take pictures of him when he's laying down in a robe with a mask and cucumbers on his eyes.

finally we get to see Gina's side of portwell

the way she considered it as flirting, this is the sign she asked for in episode 6 come onnnnn

no is Asher/jack really doing tiktok dances in an airport-

Ricky is me. I am burrito.

oh Lynne, sweetie, I'm sorry but the blonde hair is not it

is that even the same lady or-

THE BEAN

THE CHICAGO BEAN

THE BIG OLD METAL BEAN IN THE MIDDLE OF THE CITY 😭

jetlag is my go to excuse for anything... I haven't travelled in 2 years.

"welcome to the Lynne and Mike gossip show. where we talk about our depressed son that we both neglect in certain ways! And now a word from our sponsor, Nord VPN..."

SO MANY CANDLES

WHAT DEMON IS LYNNE TRYING TO SUMMON IN HIS ROOM-

is Nina becoming social media obsessed EJ from season 1? AND SHE LIED ABOUT HAVING SONGS TOO PLEASE WHY ARW THEY RECYCLING THE SAME PLOT-

Gina smiling at the picture of her family on Instagram makes me so happy, idek why.

EJ's nails are so pretty, we needed to see it more (unless he had it on for the rest of the episode and I just.... didn't notice🧍🏽‍♀️)

oh not the tiktok kid✋

yes ma'am end this strange mans whole tiktok career

sir take a hint and leave

GINA NO DONT SAY YOUR LAST NAME HE COULD BE A HUMAN TRAFFICKER

Ricky, walking in style✨

weird kid, ok then Lynne, can't you see he's this close to the edge?

not all your fault baby Ricky, Nini sucks a bit more

RICKY YOU DIDN'T COME DOWN HARD ON THE SONG-

YOU ASKED WHAT IT WAS ABOUT AND SHE SHUT YOU DOWN-

PLEASE DO NOT BLAME YOURSELF

ok but the deleting comment thing was very bad

still don't know if I like Jack honestly

hmmm so Nini's calling herself Nini instead of Nina in her little egg seat, while trying to write a song without inspiration.... Nini, honey, Ricky was your muse, he inspired you to write all those songs, even if it wasn't good for the relationship.

that doesn't mean you gotta get back with him, or that you can't write a song that not about him butttt it'll take some time

the rainbow sticker in her box and her rainbow shirt-

anyways wbk she's not totally straight

Jack are you a criminal?

quick, Gina, check his ankle for a tracker

THE YES AND PRACTICE STRIKES AGAIN

the way Gina wasn't into it in episode 6 but she's used the technique twice now

stole her grandma's Pomeranian-

Jack where the hell did you pull that out from-

the fake crying killed me, that looks like so much fun though

anyone wanna raid a first class lounge with me?

wait so is jack not gonna go in with her?

wouldn't he go in too? help look for the credit card? SO CONFUSED

the first class lounge guy was so into the drama though, watch his face when they start arguing 😭

sorry to break this to you Kourtney, but you haven't even blocked the second act yet soooo...

take that as you will

I love how all of them are totally dissing the dance off

that's the most realistic part of this show tbh

shouldn't Nini have asked how she knew....since the start? why is the fact that her best friend has knowledge of a North high secret now dawning on her...

Howie is sweet honestly, at least he's trying to help. but I stand with Kourtney, don't take him back just because he sang an amazing song, and is giving you a heads up on what's gonna happen...

KOURTNEY IS ME TRYING TO LEAVE AN ONLINE CLASS

I hate school

ooo Nini's writing a song about bad internet connection 🤩🤩🤩

I never lie, except when I do-

son that is the creepiest thing you could say to a stranger that you've been "helping"

2 truths and a lie👀

he's an Ariana fan 100%

called it.

OLDER BROTHER-

WHAT-

free spirit? damn so brother porter was in that horse movie

so has she been kissed or not?????????

I feel like she's moved more than 15 times though so possibly

but then if she's moved so much, and before east high she never opened up to anyone, she's never been kissed then?? damn

same though Gina so let's be besties please

heartbreak president is a great song title idea, give Nini a call rn

but wait

is the no strings attached feeling thing about her telling Ricky she liked him? she thought she was moving away so she thought it'd be no strings attached???

guys I think I figured it out insert the "I've connected two dots" meme

THE DUKE SWEATSHIRT

IS THAT YOUR BOYFRIEND'S

OMG I LOVE I LOVE

NOT THAT I KNOW OF???

ma'am did you just kill me

yes you did

Lynne and Ricky have such a weird relationship

YES IT DID SUCK

TODD SUCKS

LYNNE SUCKS

yeah I get that you wanted Ricky to like Todd BUT THAT WASN'T THE TIME

right so we already know that Ricky was so desperate to keep Nini cuz he didn't want to be like his parents, and now Lynne's talking about this-

Richard needs a long hug

yes Lynne, it is your fault. thank you for finally admitting it.

YES DYE YOUR HAIR

BLOND HIGHLIGHTS RICKY WILL RISE AGAIN

"sometimes the best, last thing you can do for someone you love, is let them go."

gotta admit I teared up at that point

not me thinking big red was calling ms Jenn cupcake for a hot second-

Carlos please omg, you're at the "beach" and they're leaving for the pool?

also, why not just do the call from the hotel room please omg

"don't ask me"

"Carlos"

OMG WHAT HAPPENED

big red wants the tea

O M G

SEB IS JEALOUS

JEALOUS SEBBY IS MY FAVOURITE THING IDC

I'm surprised ms Jenn knew how to give Nini permission to screenshare tbh

So lily's been stalking the East high kids and spending time editing this video while she's supposedly in an immersion trip.... right

EJ and Ashlyn's picture is so chaotic, what even is happening there

"slacking off" bestie its spring break, obviously they're confident enough that they'll get it done in time so why not focus on your own musical.

jealous seb = sassy seb

please what if those guys Carlos is posing with are his cousins or something and that's why he's so confused about Seb

6 YEAR OLD EJ I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM I LOVE HIM

Nini saying she's obsessed with her ex, that's not weird at all 👍

I can just tell Matt had a blast harassing Julia with those puppets.

Jack please dont be like that, "yet"

chances are you'll never see eachother again 🥰

(honestly sometimes I really miss those friends I made on trips and stuff when we'd spend the day or week together, only to never see them again....those were the good days though)

Ashlyn and Nini should write more songs..... something better than this one at least

Nini: "im good"

cue the Tia Mowry (please I can't spell) crying gif

oh I forgot Ricky was in the show for a hot second

1. where did Gina get to film this without people being around

2. did she just... randomly change her clothes???

ok but the transition between Carlos and EJ

*chefs kiss*

now everyone shut up, EJ's singing

oh i think I'm pregnant

HIS MUSCLES

YES KOURTNEY

I love how big red and Kourtney went from being "the best friends™" to the couple in season 1, to kinda close themselves and having their own plots

sebby makes me so happy

props to biggies editing skills honestly

PORTWELL BEING SIDE TO SIDE I CANT

AND SEBLOS OMG

big red lives for the drama

"wow" so true Ricky

no he is not cute, stop it

"holding" ok that's kinda cute

yeah EJ's a lucky guy😌

jokes aside, it's not that hard to exchange numbers-

keep in touch if you want

ok I really like Jack now

if he comes back in season 3, maybe have him be LGBTQ+ ?

like the only out characters they have rn are Seb and Carlos and they're like the sterotypes, yk?

I'd love to see jack kinda break the mold

Ricky's breaking my heart

that song just hurts

the only thing

now I don't hate Lynne????????

HOW DARE THEY WRITE IN A PROPER REDEMPTION ARC FOR HER

UGH IM SUPPOSED TO HATE HER FOREVER

I mean I don't live her now but she's good

but honestly

"mom can I show you something"

IT WAS SO BEAUTIFUL

THE PICTURE AND EVERYTHING OMG

I'm sobbing please help

Gina saying she's just waiting for the right guy and then EJ coming to the airport to pick her up late at night without her asking, offering to bring her back in the morning so she won't have to Uber, bringing her a granola bar (WHICH IS EXACTLY WHAT SHE FORGOT TO PACK) and without expecting anything in return???

ms ma'am you've got a keeper right there

her smile at the end was so heartwarming I really can't.

this episode was great.

it felt really short but I liked it, great character development for Ricky, Lynne and Gina.

Cant wait for next episode to see more of EJ being the ideal boyfriend /hj

[celebritytgcaptions]

Requests (5/23/2021)

Hi lovelies! I’ve been getting so many requests & I’m working hard to get all of them in the queue. Thanks for sending them my way! I’m writing to let you know that the queue is now full until the end of June. I was able to get every requests from my May 8th post in there except for a few. Requests from May 8th for captions featuring Katy Perry, Jenna Fischer, Marisol Nichols, Addison Rae, Ariana Grande, Erin Kellyman, Taylor Swift, Billie Eilish, Jhene Aiko, & Kirstin Maldonado will be posted in early July.

But there have been an absolute ton of requests since then too, yay! So I’m listing all the requests that I haven’t gotten to below. If you made a request but don’t see it below that might be for a few reasons. 1) I’ve written it already and it will be posted in June. 2) It’s one of the requests I posted on May 8th so I won’t talk about it here. 3) I considered it a demand not a request (for example, I received two that said “Anything with,” that wasn’t really a request just telling me to do it. Sorry if this bothers some of you but it is an issue with me so make sure you word your requests AS requests). Either way, thanks for the love, lovelies! :D

Anonymous said:

Could you do one with either Kelley O’hara or Alex Morgan from the USWNT about a guy soccer player watching the US win the world cup and then want to be them or something like that?

I actually know who both those are (shockingly enough, I don’t really follow sports) so sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Could you do lorengrey captions? She’s so hot

Sorry sweetie, don’t know who that is. :(

Anonymous said:

Hi I just had an idea for a game you could do. It could be where someone has to say as a boy what they’re like physically in stages. So first stage is hair color for example, second stage could be height, third stage could be body type, etc. An example would be if I was a black hair, short height, thick body type, I would match up with someone like Nicki Minaj. Just an idea which you could extend on. Hopefully it makes sense. I appreciate you!

I actually have a game like this mapped out called “Build a Sissy” where you choose age, hair color, and bra size, but it would take a LOT of work to make so I haven’t written it yet. Maybe some day though. :)

Anonymous said:

I would love to see a Tori Kelly caption. Her hair and body are not typical but beautiful for a white girl. I say that last sentence respectfully. I think having a caption with her would be great

Sure thing! Tori Kelly is a cutie. :)

Anonymous said:

Ok I'm not sure if u'll know these 2 cuz even I had to look them up for the names but anne dudek and maitland ward theyre the 2 blonde sisters from white chicks not sure if uve seen it but if u can could u make a caption for them please?

I DO know who they are! I’ve been thinking about doing a White Chicks caps because there’s a lot of cute looks in that movie (especially for Busy Phillips who I just love) so sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Could u do Yvette nicole brown from community? Id like to see some big girl love

Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

I already know that this request is probably gonna be a No but I still have to ask whats the ruling on GCI enhanced celebrities like Taylor swift from Cats?  Or is that too much like "Furry" stuff. Now I'm Feeling this will be a No for multiple reasons

So it is not an issue with CGI “enhanced” celebrities but for Cats it is because I do not have a Furry fetish and I get uncomfortable thinking about writing caps for it. But I write caps with “manips” all the time (photoshopped images of celebs) so I’m not ruling out CGI enhanced celebs all together.

Anonymous said:

Can you do one of Lindsey stirling? And for the story can it be a guy trying to learn Violin but he cant seem to focus he even tried hot female teachers but it didnt work then he gets a male teacher than he starts focusing and wanting to please the teacher he becomes a sissy sorry its a long request

Sounds fun, sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Hi big fan and I think you’ve been doing amazing work. Is there anyway you could do a story about a guy who loses a bet to sorority girl and is forced to get his nails painted and turned into a girl? I love the idea of having a boys nails painted against his will. I’d love one with Selena Gomez but if you think another celeb would be better I leave that cumpletely to you.

Totally! This sounds fun. :D

Anonymous said:

Can you do thelma and Louise?

I’m assuming you mean Geena Davis & Susan Sarandon from Thelma & Louise so yes. Yes I can. :)

Anonymous said:

Can you do a caption from the movie bridesmaids? Like when theyre all trying on dressess or something?

I haven’t seen Bridesmaids (I know I know) but I can try something. :)

Anonymous said:

it would be super cool if you could do some more games! They’re my fav

Glad you like them! As long as I’m not on hiatus, games will be posted every second Saturday. I’ve already got two set for June. :)

Anonymous said:

Hey huge fan of your recent work and super excited about new caps!! Do you think you could do one about a college guy who drops out in pursuit of being a stand up comedian, but the comedy club needs a female comic so they turn him into a girl? I was thinking maybe Nikki Glaser, she so funny and sexy. Thanks can’t wait to see all your new stuff!!

Oooo, Nikki Glaser is great. Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Can you make a caption about a guy who makes fun of curvy and thicc women, where the women get their revenge and turn the guy into Nia Jax?

You got it!

Anonymous said:

Hi Me again on the topic of the assembly line worker caption sequel if you do it i just an idea for the story like before depicting the sissies "first time"  but you can have it be that the coworker doesnt know and is telling everyone about the chick he slept with last night and the sissy is just thinking "if only they knew"idk i thought it was good anyways thank u again

So this message is in reference to a sequel caption that was requested & that I did write and will be posted in June. I’m sharing it here to let the anon know that I wrote the cap BEFORE I got this second request so there will be a followup but the story will be different. I hope that’s ok.

Anonymous said:

Hi idk if u watch wrestling or not I see u have some captions of wwe womens wrestlers but im not sure have far ur knowledge of it is? Could u do a caption of Rhea Ripley if u know her?

I have never seen a single episode of WWE, I do not watch wrestling, and yet somehow every time someone requests a wrestler I know who she is. Don’t ask me how because I do not know. Anyways, yeah I can do a Rhea Ripley one. :)

Anonymous said:

Could you do a caption about a janitor for sissy co. That finds out the strange goings on at work and tries to blow the whistle on the whole operation but is caught and turned into a sissy maid for the sissy co. Corporate office abit specific I know but ive been thinking on that awhile however u do it will be perfect thanks

You got it!

Anonymous said:

Could you do katheryn Hahn from wandavision specifically the 80s look with the Big hair and aerobics outfit

Oooo, sounds nice. I’ll type that up for sure. :)

Anonymous said:

Hi big fan of your caps!! Do you think you could do a cap where a football player wants to go to the NFL but gets hurt, so they turn him into a female commentator, maybe Lauren Rutledge? If you don’t know her, she’s been a college football reporter for awhile and was also a former Miss Florida. Anyways I just think any guy would be lucky to be turned into her and I love your caps keep up the great work!!

Me: *googles Lauren Rutledge to see if it’s who I’m thinking of* How do I know who this is? Anyways, yes I can write this. :)

...for some reason there are no GIFs of her though so I’m just gonna move on.

Anonymous said:

Hi I'm the one that requested the LONG list of celebs I'm still really sorry about that I didnt realize how many it actually was till I looked back so I wanna retract some for your sake tell ya what if you havent done any already just do the ones that are specifically marked (as in the ones detailed by movie or show theyre in) the ones that are just names you can leave out i knoe its still alot but hopefully that takes some weight off of ya sorry again

You don’t have to be sorry! Like I said, in the future I’d ask that folks limit requests to no more than 3 celebs at a time but you didn’t know that. I’d never said that before. I typed up every celebrity and they’re going to be sprinkled in during June. Hope you like them! :)

Anonymous said:

Hello ^^ I love your work. Can u make a caption with the name "jules" and Ariana Grande please? Thank you

Sure thing!

Anonymous said:

Hey, not really an ask, but something I needed to share

I'm the one that asked for the Stephanie Beatriz caption from a whole back, and I absolutely loved how it turned out. Each time you roll out a new caption is like a small thrill to me and I read them right as they're released.

Now this wouldn't be an ask if I wasn't asking something, right? Well, next month sees the release of the "In the Heights" movie, and there's an opportunity there to do a series of captions using stephanie Beatriz from that same movie.

In conclusion, I love your captions so much, you're amazing!

Awww, this is such a sweet message. Thank you! And YAAASSSSS! Ever since the first trailer for In the Heights dropped I was like, “I must write a caption with her in this!” So you can imagine how fun it’s been waiting this entire time. *eye twitches*. We’ll have to wait until the movie comes out for me to be sure I can find a good image but this IS a caption I want to write. :)

Anonymous said:

Hi I just recently came across your blog and fell in love with it!! The caption with the football player being turned into Bella Thorne is one of my favorites!! I’d love so much if you could do a sequel or something to that cap it was so amazing and I need to know what else happens to “her”. I’m not sure if this is possible or if you even do sequels but this cap was great and I look forward to all the others!!!

Glad you like it! I’m always looking for sequel captions to write on Throwback Thursday so you’ll get this for sure. :)

Anonymous said:

Hey big fan! Do you think you could do a caption where a short guy gets made fun of by all his girl friends for how short he is? Ariana Grande is fairly short and I think a caption of her (of age of course) would be awesome

You got it!

Anonymous said:

Can you do one with the bella twins as two guys who fought over the same girl then the girl turns them both into look alikes of her but then they start fighting over the same guy

Yep!

Anonymous said:

Do you know suzy berhow? Or angie Griffin? If so would love a caption of either of them please

Sorry sweetie, I don’t know who those are. :(

Anonymous said:

Would appreciate more Sia captions please when u get the chance

I will remember that. :)

Anonymous said:

Can make some Winnie Harlow caption please? I adore her style

Sorry lovely, I don’t know who that is. :(

Anonymous said:

How about instead of removing the captions with Demi in them ,the images of Demi were just replaced with another celeb and if Demi is mentioned by name in the caption then that could be edited  to mention a different celeb. I respect Demi's decision I do but lets not lose some well made captions. Also if you could please make a caption where Amy Adams feminises a fan and raises them as her daughter and Kristen Stewart makes you her submissive wife that would be appreciated. I'm a fan of them.

So about the Demi Lovato captions: I understand your feelings but I’m still going to delete the original captions. Because of how my captions are made I can’t just go back in & swap out an image or edit the text, I have to remake it from the ground up. I am hoping to do that with some (maybe all) of the Demi Lovato captions & re-publish them, but I’m still going to delete the originals.

I can do the Kristen Stewart one for sure and I’ll TRY to do the Amy Adams one I just am not 100% sure I can find a pic for that but we’ll see. :)

Anonymous said:

If it’s possible before your summer hiatus could you do a caption with Amanda Crew (silicon valley, sex drive)?

I will do one with Amanda Crew but I can’t commit to doing it before the hiatus.

About the hiatus: I don’t know when it’s going to be. I want to TRY to make it to at least July 18th because I have a specific game in mind I want to post for 5 years of Celebrity TG Captions games, but after that I have no idea. I’ve been writing caps for a longer stretch of time since normal since I’ve switched to a part-time blog so I might burn out at any second but for right now I’ve still got some juice.

[acabecca]

“Say that you wanna be with me too.” JAS AND BUCKY

I have no idea what this is I’m sorry. I wanted to make it longer and set it during THAT episode of fatws but it didn’t make sense to me to do it, even as an au because apparently I am very fussy when it comes to Jas and Bucky 🙄

(also the picture is not what happens in the prompt i just like is lol)

(featuring a surprise cameo by mr steven rogers because my mind cant process that he might possibly be and is most probably the D word) this prompt is unnecessarily long i apologise

*

Pushing her sunglasses up on top of her head, Jas kept hold of the brightly wrapped present and nudged the car door closed with her hip. She heard more than saw the kids playing somewhere over beside the cabin, and she made her way over to place the box in her hands on the table that was already crammed full of gifts.

Pepper had clearly gone all out and so had everyone else, trying to overcompensate for Tony not being around. It was Morgan’s first birthday without him, and Pepper had opted to invite everyone around instead of the two of them spending it alone, trying to distract her daughter with gifts and friends and games so she didn’t dwell too much on the fact that her father would never be at another one of her birthday parties.

“It’s about time you got here.”

“Yeah, sorry, I’m terrible at gift wrapping so I stopped by my aunt’s place so she could make it look pretty for me,” Jas patted the top of the gift and sent Sam a grateful smile as she took the bottle of water he handed to her.

“Uh-huh,” he hummed, peering at the gift tag. “What’d we get her?”

Jas blinked. “We?”

“Me, you, and Bucky.”

“I’m sorry, was this supposed to be from all of us?” Jas’ brow furrowed in confusion. “Because I’m pretty sure I’m the one who hauled my ass all over New York looking for the perfect present for baby Stark, and I don’t recall you or Bucky giving me any money for it.”

Sam groaned loudly. “Come on, Jas. I’ve been busy. I’ve been on a mission.”

“Yes, I know,” Jas nodded her head. “I was with you. I still made time to go shopping for a six year old’s birthday party. You’re terrible! Bucky didn’t get her anything, either?”

“It’s Bucky,” Sam shrugged his shoulders as though that was enough of an explanation and Jas rolled her eyes, lifting her hand to wave at Pepper, who wiggled her fingers in return before rushing back inside the cabin.

“Jasmine!”

Jas turned at the sound of her voice, grinning when she saw Morgan running towards her and crouching down just in time to catch the little girl as she flung herself forwards. “Hey birthday girl! Are you having a good day? Your mom’s done a lot, huh?”

“There are so many cupcakes,” Morgan’s eyes went wide. “Too many to even count! I tried. Did you bring me a present?” she asked curiously.

“I did!” Jas laughed, turning around just in time to see Sam inconspicuously adding his own name to the bottom of the gift tag. “It’s from Sam, too, and Bucky. But you’re not allowed to open it until your mom says so, okay? I think we’re doing gifts later.”

“I know,” Morgan sighed. “She let me open one, though! Well…” she paused thoughtfully. “Clint snuck it to me and told me to open it before anyone saw. He got me a bow and arrow set and Lila is going to teach me how to use it, and Bruce got me a chemistry set so I can learn how to help him in his lab and stuff like my daddy did, and- did you know Bucky can pick me and Nate up with only one arm?”

“He can, huh?” Jas raised her eyebrows. “That’s awesome! Sounds like you’re having a great day, kiddo.”

“Yeah,” she paused again, biting down on her lip. “I’m going to go back to play with Nate, now. Bye Jasmine, bye Sam! Thank you for coming!” she called, sending a wave over her shoulder as she took off running towards the other kids.

“Good thing she got her manners from her mom,” Sam snorted.

“Hmm,” Jas hummed, a soft smile on her face. “Don’t think I didn’t see you adding your name on the gift tag. You add Bucky’s, too? You better had or he’ll feel like shit for not getting her anything. Where is he, by the way?”

“Sitting down by the kids with Steve.”

Jas almost choked on the sip of water she’d just taken and Sam slapped her hard on the back. “Steve?” she squealed, coughing and wiping at her mouth. “Steve, Steve? Steve Rogers, Steve?”

“You know another Steve who’d be here?” Sam asked with raised eyebrows.

“Steve is here and you give me a poxy bottle of water? Dammit, Sam! I need something stronger,” she groaned softly, screwing the lid back on to her water and, spotting the cooler sitting on the grass by the corner of the cabin, she made her way over to it and reached for a beer at the exact same time someone else did. Looking up as her hand connected with someone else’s, she mer a pair of familiar blue eyes and couldn’t stop herself from grinning. “Hey, Buck! I hear you’ve been keeping Morgan and Nate entertained with your impressive strength,” she raised an eyebrow, unscrewing the cap off her beer and taking a long sip. “Have you been here long?” she asked, but Bucky didn’t reply.

Instead, he grabbed two bottles out of the cooler and straightened up, looking between Jas and Sam before sending her a tight smile and turning to walk back in the direction he’d come from, disappearing around the side of the cabin. Jas turned to Sam in bewilderment.

“What was that about?” she asked, but Sam avoided her gaze as he lifted his bottle to his lips. “Sam? He’s been ignoring me for days. What’s wrong with him, did I do something? I know you know something.”

Sighing, Sam ran a hand over his face. “Look, I don’t wanna get involved in whatever it is the two of you have got going on-”

“What?” Jas interrupted. “There’s nothing going on. What are you talking about?”

“Awfully quick on the defence there, James,” Sam smirked. “...I told him I wouldn’t say anything, and I’m not going to, but do you really not know what you did?” he asked, rolling his eyes when Jas shook her head. “Think back a bit. Day before we flew home, you were talking to your auntie. About Steve. About how they could never really replace Captain America, because he was irreplaceable.”

“Yeah…?” Jas trailer off in confusion. “But, I’m right. They can’t? They tried, and look how well it worked out. They’ll never find anyone like Steve.”

“They’ll never find anyone like Steve, or you’ll never find anyone like Steve?” Sam questioned, smirking when Jas’ face paled slightly.

“That- that’s what he- is that what Bucky thinks I meant?”

“Uh-huh.”

“That is not what I meant.”

“I know.”

“And- did you tell Bucky that isn’t what I meant?”

“I tried,” Sam shrugged. “S’not me he needs to hear it from. I’m not the one he’s got a thing for.”

“Shut up, he does not have a thing for me,” Jas grumbled, shoving at Sam’s face and feeling her cheeks heat up as he cackled beside her. “Sam!”

“What? You’re both too good at avoiding what’s been happening between you for months now and I, for one, am sick of it,” Sam pointed at himself. “I’m the one who has to sit in planes and in cramped apartments and shit with the pair of you and honestly? I’m done. I’m tired of it. We’re at a kids birthday party and the sexual tension between the pair of you is so unhealthy-”

“Sam!” Jas repeated, shoving at him again. “We don’t- that is not- there is none of that tension between us.”

Sam scoffed. “Don’t act like you don’t want Barnes to bend you over and-”

“SAM!” Jas shrieked, darting forwards and covering his mouth with her hand, her whole face turning red when she saw the looks Clint, Pepper, and Laura were throwing her. “Jesus, I- okay. Alright. So what if I do? He’s never made a move, has he? So this whole thing is probably just all in your head.”

“If you’re waiting for him to make the first move then you’re gonna be waiting a hell of a long time, baby. He thinks you’re still hung up on Cap and he’s also a 106 year old emotionally constipated ex-assassin. You’re gonna have to be the one who moves in first, or it’s never gonna happen,” Sam told her gently, reaching forwards and taking her drink out of her hand. “You can start by telling him he got it wrong when you said Steve was irreplaceable. Maybe drop in a little ‘Sam was right and you should listen to him more’, maybe make my life a little easier in future.”

Jas paused, chewing on her bottom lip as nerves filled her stomach. This was not how she had envisioned today going. She’d been expecting a lot of laughs, maybe some tears because she hadn’t been out here since Tony’s funeral, good food and lots of drinks, and now she was seriously contemplating dragging Bucky - her best friend - away from everyone so she could apologise for a misunderstanding that had left him brooding for the last five days. She moaned, pulling her sunglasses off her head and running a hand through her hair.

“I can’t just go talk to him,” she whispered. “He’s… He‘s with Steve. I haven’t seen Steve since… everything. It’s rude if I just go and drag Bucky away from an old man-”

“Either you drag him away or I do. I’ll come with you, I’ll keep Steve occupied and you go talk to Bucky. I am literally being your wingman.”

“Living up to your name.”

“Shut the hell up and get your annoying ass over to your equally annoying boyfriend,” Sam snorted, turning her round and pushing her towards where he knew Bucky and Steve were sitting together. Jas let out a squeak and reached behind her to swat his hands away, laughed as she turned the corner and saw Bucky sat beside Steve on a bench in the shade, watching Morgan run around with some of her friends.

Steve spotted her first and he sent a small, unsure wave. Jas smiled softly in reply and tucked her hair behind her ears, her sunglasses perched atop her head again as she came to a stop in front of them.

“Uhm, hi. Bucky, can I talk to you for a second?”

He looked up, squinting against the sunlight. “Sure.”

“Uh,” Jas glanced at Steve. “In private, maybe?”

Bucky shook his head. “I’m just in the middle of talking to Steve.”

“Oh, I don’t mind, Buck,” Steve looked between the two of them, a somewhat knowing look on his face. “You should go with Jas.”

“But-”

“I’ll sit with Gramps, don’t worry about it man,” Sam clapped Steve on the shoulder, not-so-subtly nudging Bucky out of his seat and forcing him to stand up. Huffing, Bucky placed his beer down on the grass and gestured towards the cabin. Jas nodded her head and followed after him, turning to shoot a glare in Sam’s direction when he called a quick “good luck!” after them.

Following Bucky inside, Jas glanced around the cabin, her eyes lingering on the picture above the fireplace, a selfie that Tony has clearly taken of himself, Pepper, and Morgan. Clearing her throat, Jas blinked rapidly as she tried to keep any tears from falling and ignored the way Bucky was watching her.

“You okay?”

“Yeah, you know, it’s just…” she waved a hand towards the picture and Bucky followed her gaze, frowning as he nodded his head.

“We don’t have to stay in here,” he told her. “We can- come on,” he pointed towards the kitchen and Jas trailed after him, coming to a stop by the breakfast bar as Bucky against the worktop opposite her, his arms crossed over his chest. “So uh, you wanna talk?”

“Yeah, I- listen, I didn’t- what I said, about Steve being irreplaceable?” Jas began meekly, and Bucky screwed his eyes shut as he muttered something that sounded suspiciously like ‘I’m gonna kill Wilson’ under his breath. “I think you took it the wrong way.”

“Jasmine, it’s- I- it doesn’t matter-”

“No it does!” she insisted quickly. “It does matter, Buck, because I didn’t mean it the way you think I mean it, and I don’t want you to think that I don’t- I didn’t mean that you’re not…” she paused, trailing off nervously. “You know you’re important to me, right? And I guess I don’t want you to think that there isn’t room in you for life because of my past with Steve, because that’s not what I meant.”

Bucky’s whole face was screwed up, his expression something Jas couldn’t decipher and she almost groaned when she realised he was obviously annoyed by something she had just said.

“You think I want to be a replacement?” Bucky asked carefully. “You think I want to take Steve’s place in your life?”

“No! I mean, I… I don’t know?” Jas replied meekly. “Maybe? I thought you were-”

“I want my own place in your life, Jasmine,” he cut in. “I don’t have any intention of being a replacement for anyone, especially not Steve. I know I could never replace him,” he gestured towards the kitchen window, where they could see Steve and Sam both sat outside of. The two men quickly looked away and Bucky rolled his eyes, pinching the bridge of his nose at his friends making it painfully obvious they were listening in. “I see Steve never learned how to be subtle in his old age.”

“Nope,” Jas bit back a smirk and Bucky sighed, grabbing hold of her arm and leading her away from the window. “Look, I thought maybe we - you and I - I thought that maybe there was something happening? That there was something here between us. Am I wrong?” he asked cautiously. “Tell me if I’m wrong and I’ll stop. I can just be your friend, I don’t need or expect anything else from you, not even your friendship if that’s something you don’t want-”

“…Bucky-”

“I want to be with you, Jasmine,” he admitted, his voice low and his cheeks a little bit pink. “I do. I have for a really long time. And if you say that you wanna be with me too, then great! I can take you out on dates, we can get to know each other beyond friendship. But if you don’t? That’s okay, too. Whatever you decide. I just need to know where I stand,” Bucky kept his gaze on her, his heart thumping so loudly in his chest he was sure Jas would be able to hear it. When she didn’t say anything, his stomach sank and he frowned. “Okay, that’s fine, we can forget that I said anything and-”

“No, wait!” Jas gasped, reaching out and grabbing his arm as he began to turn away from her. She tugged him back towards her, standing on her toes and quickly pressing her lips to his. It was a quick kiss, over in a few seconds, and Bucky had barely had time to respond to it before Jas was dropped back down on her toes and clearing her throat awkwardly, her face red. “Sorry, I… I was processing. I’d really like to go on dates with you, Bucky.”

He grinned. “Yeah?”

“Yeah.”

“Okay,” he nodded. “Good. That’s… That‘s good. I’d like that.”

“Bucky.”

“Yeah?”

“You gonna kiss me or am I gonna be the one doing all the heavy lifting in this relationship?” Jas raised an eyebrow and Bucky chuckled, slipping an arm around her and pulling her towards him. He leaned in closer to her, before freezing and looking at her with a furrowed brow. “What is it, Barnes? Did you change your mind already?”

“You don’t still have feelings for Steve, do you?”

“No!” Jas pulled a face. “Bucky. He’s old. Like really old.”

“So am I!”

“Yeah but he looks old.”

“Wow, never had you down for the shallow type, Jasmine.”

She groaned. “Just shut up and kiss me.”

“Okay,” Bucky hummed, finally closing the gap between them and doing as she asked.

Outside, Sam beamed as he peered through the window before he held his hand out to Steve, who sighed and begrudgingly shoved $20 into his waiting palm.

“Don’t think I didn’t see you talking to her, Sam,” Steve grumbled. “You hustled an old man.”

“Yeah,” Sam smiled widely, stuffing the money into the pocket of his jeans. “I did.”

taglist: @sgtbuckyybarnes @mer-writes @foxesandmagic @ohmansebastianstan @chlobenet @jewelswrites-ish @lukespatterson @ocappreciationtag @marveloc-hq (let me know if you want to be added/removed)

[hongism]

mists of celeste ➻ 18.5

➻ pairing: ??? x fem reader ➻ genre: space au, pirate au, space pirate!ateez, angst, eventual smut ➻ Word Count: 3.2k ➻ Rating: M ➻ Warnings: language, violence, guns and weaponry, blood, future warnings tba ➻ summary: Sneaking aboard the ship of a renowned space pirate may not have been the best idea, but you’ll have to make do with what fate has handed to you

⇐ previous | next ⇒ | masterlist

act two ➻ part 8.5

​​​

Jongho doesn’t need to be told what’s going on. He senses it before Yeosang even comes to the door, feels Yeosang’s presence outside the door, the heat of his emotions, and the slight panic that courses through his veins. He doesn’t need to be told that Mingi is having an episode because he can feel it. Which is why when Yeosang goes to knock on the door, Jongho opens it a breath too soon, and Yeosang nearly topples forward and trips over the air. Jongho doesn’t need to reach out and catch him – Yeosang stays on his two feet just fine – but he does regardless, rough hands hitting the much smaller man square in the chest to keep him from falling forward. He doesn’t need to ask, yet he does.

“Mingi?”

“Mess hall.”

“Okay. Did he hurt anyone?” Jongho has the questions memorized. No matter how many times he says them, the answers rarely change, and he knows Yeosang well enough to pick up on the emotional cues. That’s how he knows Wooyoung is fine before Yeosang even opens his mouth to tell him so.

“No, I got Wooyoung out of there before he could.”

“Hongjoong?”

“Tried already.”

“Yunho?”

“Couldn’t help.”

“Ah,” Jongho exhales, even though he already knew the answers to those questions before asking them. He’s the last resort. He always is. Hongjoong demands priority – he needs to feel useful somehow, but it always backfires and hurts him in the end. Then comes Yunho, the ever desperate healer, the arrogance that drives him to believe that he can fix everything and everyone – including Mingi. The reality, however harsh and cruel it may be, is that none of them are Jongho. None of them understand Mingi the way he does. None of them are Berserkers. It’s just a simple fact, but one that they can’t seem to wrap their minds around, which is why Jongho is always the last resort.

He pushes past Yeosang to step into the corridor. His steps are hurried but not frantic; there is no panic or worry in his bones as he walks towards the mess hall. It’s routine almost. Perhaps someone else might feel bitterness or some sort of resentment towards this system they have. Not Jongho though. He bears no hatred or thinly veiled anger about the arrangement they carry out. Part of him feels the tuggings of responsibility when he looks at Mingi. When he looks at Mingi and sees… something. Something different, something painful, something raw and broken.

When Mingi first joined the crew, the others all expected Jongho to understand him. To read him like a book and take him apart with ease. He hadn’t been able to do that at any point in time. Because he and Mingi are not the same, never have been and never will be. Jongho was raised by a loving mother and father. A mother who was a Berserker just like him, who took care of him and looked after him without any hesitation. Taught him everything there was to know about what it meant to be a Berserker. Mingi, on the other hand, was not given that luxury. His father never loved him; he loved money. Power. Blood. And that’s what Mingi gave him, because it was the only thing he knew.

The mess hall is quiet when he steps inside. Not empty, but quiet. Hongjoong stands at the edge of the room, leaning up against the frame of the entrance with arms crossed over his chest. Disappointment radiates off him in waves, but not directed at anyone except himself. Yunho stands beside him with a similar stance, although he can’t look at Mingi’s curled form. The room is otherwise empty, and that’s probably for the best. And Mingi. Mingi lies on the floor, not near the center but somewhere off to the side between a few tables. He’s on his hands and knees, back curved in a way that is painful to look at, and as Jongho draws nearer, he can see the tremble in his shoulders. He doesn’t think to ask what happened. It wouldn’t be necessary anyway. He barely notices that Yeosang is no longer hot on his heels and following his steps.

“It’s too much of a burden to put on his shoulders.”

Hongjoong doesn’t verbalize the words, but he can feel them regardless. Words that have been muttered and whispered against hot ears when they think Jongho can’t hear them. None spoken with malice or hatred. Just… concern. Worry. Fear.

“He’s so young. Why do we push this onto him?”

Because Jongho understands him. Knows Mingi better than Mingi knows himself. Feels the things he feels, even if they were raised differently and experience it differently. He understands the control, the taut thread keeping Mingi tied to sanity, and how it threatens to snap. And when it wavers and trembles — that is where these episodes find him.

“I’m the captain. I should handle this myself.”

Hongjoong doesn’t understand it. The things that he wishes to understand are things that he can never hope to grasp.

“I’m a healer. A medic. This is my job.”

Yunho fails to realize that it isn’t his responsibility. It is his job, but not his burden to bear. He sees Mingi as something broken, when Mingi isn’t broken at all. Mingi is a bird that never learned to fly, a slave without a master, a boy robbed of his innocence too young. Not broken.

Jongho hesitates near Mingi. The older man doesn’t shift or make any indication of acknowledging him. The emotions are there though, and that’s how Jongho knows that Mingi is fully aware of his lingering presence behind him.

“Mingi,” he starts, tone so soft and quiet that he can barely hear it himself. Ever so slowly, he lets himself squat down beside Mingi’s body. Heat. It radiates off him in waves. Then in the corner, concern from Yunho, the lingering taste of disappointment from Hongjoong, and nothing else. Patience is a challenging game to play, even harder when it comes to Mingi, but necessary. Thus, Jongho waits. Watches the way Mingi’s shoulders tremble from effort, the tethered thread in his mind wavering but never breaking. He’s fighting it so hard. “Mingi, can you hear me?”

“I-I… can’t. Can’t. Need. N-Need it.” His tone is desperate and fragile. Nothing like the cruel and heartless killing monster he seems to be. Mingi brings a hand up to clasp the back of his neck. His nails tear at the skin in attempts to break it and draw blood.

“No, you don’t.” Mingi’s fingers falter. He hesitates. For a moment, his nails cease their warpath on his skin.

“I want to – want to k-kill.” Mingi lifts his chin a little. He doesn’t look up quite yet, and Jongho knows it’s because he can feel the lingering emotions at the other side of the room. He is more afraid of losing control than he should be. The danger is minimal. Mingi won’t kill either of them. Hongjoong knows it, as does Yunho, and Jongho as well. Mingi is the only one who doesn’t trust it.

“You don’t want to, Mingi,” Jongho insists, letting his elbows find purchase on his knees. Jongho gets it on occasion. The sudden urgings that Mingi suffers from – the need to take control over all the emotions hitting him from all sides. It manifests itself differently for every Berserker. For Jongho, it takes the form of guilt. Brings all his wrongdoings to life and places them before his eyes in a way that’s almost tangible. He can never overcome it alone, and that fact almost makes him feel weak. Yunho’s soft hands in his hair, San’s mellifluous voice in his ears, Seonghwa’s mint-like scent that permeates his senses until the hallucinations pass, Hongjoong’s emotions hitting him square in the chest and reminding him that this is real. It isn’t violent. Emotional, yes. Painful for himself and only himself. But for Mingi, it manifests in violence. Anger and every emotion on the spectrum of rage.

Mingi’s fingers draw away from his neck, but he brings the hand down to his other arm a second later. His nails dig deep, he’s desperate to break skin, he’s burning for the red that will flow from his flesh. Jongho can’t let him have it. If he does, then that thin thread of sanity will snap. Years of progress down the drain. A hard reset. He reaches out, hand brushing against Mingi’s shoulder blades.

Mingi jerks at the touch, almost as though he’s been burned. He doesn’t verbally cry out, but Jongho hears the pained cry in his movements and emotions. It hurts every time. A small and nagging sensation that never leaves Jongho alone, one he will think about for hours if not days after this. Mingi cries out for help and support but pushes it away at the same time. Desires help but doesn’t know how to ask for it.

“Mingi,” Jongho exhales as he brings his hand down on the man’s shoulder blades again. Mingi jolts at the touch, hand drawing up but not coming down on Jongho. He prepares himself for a hit and everything, but it never comes. Instead, Mingi brings his closed fist down on his own head, smacks his skull with too much force, an expression of pure anguish on his features. He’s fighting it. Jongho knows that Mingi’s mind is screaming for blood. To close his hands around Jongho’s throat and try to end it. The desire to kill… it’s not Mingi, but rather the Brute of Kebos. The monster his father created. It’s not Mingi. Jongho has to remind himself of that over and over again. It’s the only way he can look Mingi in the eye every day. His tone softens as he speaks. “They’re loud, aren’t they?”

“So loud. S-So loud. Can’t think. C-Cant–” Mingi cuts himself off, unable to finish the thought. Yunho once told Jongho that Mingi didn’t feel emotions. Just didn’t have the proper mind for it, and that he would have to be taught how to handle things. Jongho dared to tell Yunho to his face that he was wrong. Mingi feels emotions. He has them. It isn’t that his brain is wired the wrong way. It’s that he was never taught how to understand them. Mingi doesn’t know how to talk about his feelings because of that. Jongho can read him like a book, feel the heat radiating off him in waves and know what’s going through his head even if he blocks it out. Mingi’s emotions are overwhelming, even with Jongho’s resilience and restraint. All that to say – the pain Mingi is in now is enough to cripple Jongho and bring him fully to the ground. The aura is overwhelming, and for a breath of a moment, Jongho isn’t sure he can do what he’s supposed to do. The face of his mother taunts him at the edge of the room. He responds by closing his fingers around Mingi’s wrist, stopping the hallucination from blossoming as well as stopping Mingi from hitting himself any more.

“It’s okay, Mingi. They can’t hurt you here,” Jongho murmurs even though he knows that isn’t the brunt of the issue. Mingi’s wrist goes slack in his grip. For a second, Jongho thinks that the episode has passed, but then weight slams against him, and pain blooms in his chest. He falls back against one of the metal tables. Metal scrapes against metal, creating a loud and abrasive screech, then the floor disappears out from under Jongho. He doesn’t have time to defend himself. Mingi’s fingers close around his ankle, yanking back harshly until Jongho hits the floor. Pressure hits his chest. Jongho doesn’t even process it at first. Mingi’s knee stabs into his chest and pins him to the floor with little effort. However, Jongho is stronger than Mingi. They both know it. Jongho could flip their positions and have Mingi facedown on the floor in seconds. That isn’t what this is about though.

Progress.

“Mingi!”

Steps forward.

“Stop!”

Steps backward.

Yunho and Hongjoong are shouting, voices getting louder as they move closer, but Jongho manages to bring a hand up to stop them. They have zero reason to listen to him and no incentive either, especially because Mingi has one knee square in the middle of Jongho’s chest, the other pinning his right arm down, and both hands wrapped tight around Jongho’s throat. Perhaps he should be scared of what might happen next. Afraid that Mingi tightens his grip and chokes him to death. Both Yunho and Hongjoong are exuding so much fear and panic that it clogs Jongho’s senses, and if it’s affecting him that badly, then that means that Mingi is having a much worse time with it.

Yet despite having his life dangled before his eyes like this, Jongho isn’t afraid that Mingi might kill him. Maybe he’s psychotic for that, or perhaps he just trusts the fact that Mingi doesn’t want to do this that much. Yes, it has to be the latter. He lets Mingi keep him pinned to the floor, hand still raised in Hongjoong and Yunho’s direction and keeping them warded off for the time being. Mingi’s nails dig into the flesh of his throat.

Pain.

Pain, but not from the small crescents Mingi leaves in his neck.

The pain radiates off Mingi’s shoulders. He’s fighting himself so hard, fighting the instinct to kill, the urge to kill, the need to kill. He’s fighting the other part of himself, the one his father forged in blood and dark arenas. Mingi doesn’t know that he’s feeling pain necessarily; he merely knows that he’s hurting. He knows the strain hurts and burns, makes his skin crawl and itch, makes even breathing become a laborious task. Jongho lets his free hand move towards Mingi – each inch breached is slow and calculated as not to scare the man – and lays it atop the ones clasped over his throat.

“You can’t hurt me, Mingi,” he whispers. Mingi’s resolve flickers. For the briefest moment, he believes Jongho, eyes trailing over his own hands like they don’t belong to him.

“It… it hurts.”

“I know it does. Everything hurts, right? They’re loud in your head, telling you to kill.”

“Blood. They w-want blood.” Mingi’s fingers twitch around his neck. His nails dig a bit deeper, and Jongho feels them breach skin. It isn’t deep enough to draw blood, which is for the best because the second the first drop falls, Mingi will fly into a rampage.

“You don’t have to give it to them, Mingi.”

“They’ll hurt me if I don’t.”

“You’ll hurt me if you do.”

Mingi freezes at his words. His hands loosen a bit but don’t move away from Jongho’s body. It’s the last thing he wants, because as cruel and heartless and merciless as Mingi is, he doesn’t want to hurt Jongho. Doesn’t want to hurt Hongjoong or Yunho. Any of the crew. He wants to protect them; he just doesn’t understand how to do that because of the war that goes on in his mind.

“I… did I not already hurt you?” Mingi inquires, gaze curious as he tilts his head to the side. “Your emotions… they – they feel – I hurt you.”

“You didn’t. Tell me what you feel.”

“I don’t know what I feel!” Mingi argues, a spike of anger shooting out towards Jongho. He can barely choke out his next words thanks to the sudden clench of Mingi’s fingers around his throat.

“What I feel. M-Mingi, tell me – tell me what you feel from me.” He’s pushing hard, and perhaps it’s too much of a burden to put on Mingi’s shoulders like this, but at the same time, it’s not enough. Mingi is caught off-guard long enough for Jongho to gasp several deep breaths of air.

“You’re… warm.”

“Does it hurt?” This is the only way Jongho knows how to communicate with Mingi. He can’t name the emotions off one by one because Mingi wouldn’t understand what any of it means, but he does know how to talk about how he’s feeling without naming anything directly.

“N-No.”

“So, are you hurting me?”

Mingi shakes his head ever so slightly. Denial. This time, he believes it for more than a second. Mingi withdraws his hands from Jongho’s neck, letting him fully breathe again, and Jongho rolls out from under the taller Berserker before he can be pinned once more. He doesn’t move because he fears having his life in Mingi’s hands. He would gladly give his life over to the man time and time again if it meant protecting the others from harm. The storm that swirls in Mingi’s dark red eyes calms for the time being. The waters are peaceful. The voices are quiet. And Mingi… Mingi cries. Not for the first time, and not for the last, but he cries nonetheless, hands trembling as he holds them close to his chest. Behind them, the panic and fear radiating off Hongjoong and Yunho slowly dissipates. It grows calm again.

Jongho draws closer to Mingi, kneeling beside him and pressing a hand again Mingi’s shaking ones. It doesn’t stop the trembling or offer any comfort in the slightest. Jongho doesn’t expect it to. Mingi doesn’t understand comfort, only the need for it. But they’ll just keep trying until they find something that works. Like what Hongjoong does next. The short captain walks towards where Jongho and Mingi are and squats down in front of ashy-haired Berserker.

“You pulled yourself out of it, Mingi,” he says, tone quiet but clear. It carries weight with it, one that Mingi picks up on within an instant.

“I al-almost–”

“But you didn’t. You didn’t kill anyone. Didn’t hurt anyone.” A smile twitches across Hongjoong’s lips, soft and gentle as he gazes down at Mingi’s slumped form. “I’m proud of you.”

The simple four words hold more than should be humanly possible, but Jongho supposes that it makes sense since he and Mingi aren’t wholly human. Mingi’s tears halt only long enough for him to offer an awkward yet grateful smile. Hongjoong eats it right up. He reaches across the gap between him and Mingi, not concerned for a second that Mingi could snap his arm in half at the slightest trigger, and drops his hand to the mop of hair atop his head. A small ruffle of the locks, fingers gently combing over Mingi’s scalp, then pulling away. Jongho wants to imagine that Mingi leaned into the touch, eyes fluttering shut as an overwhelming sense of peace washed over his body.

✧✧✧ a/n: surprise?? this is definitely one that was unexpected for me but i was struck with a sudden realization and plan for mingi’s character progression and how he functions as a character, and this idea wouldn’t leave me alone so i just had to write it and post it today because we’ve got regular chapter tomorrow osidjafoidj but i hope you guys like it!! i think this is the most important interim chapter and has a lot of impact on mingi’s character in the main plot sooo yee lemme know what you think!

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[dontgofarfromme]

I'm so wildly excited for next episode and here's why.

Beau went into that thinking she wasn't coming back (I think Marisha went into that thinking Beau might not be coming back). She's at basically shot directly from the highest personal point she's ever reached to rock bottom in the last 2 days, and it's her father's fault. She's spent the last months learning and growing and becoming a wonderful person and making important, beautiful connections with her friends--her family, if remember right Beau was actually the first one to call them that, a long time ago--and helping people and saving the world. She's opened her heart as much as she ever has since leaving home, and it's been worth it.

But then they go back to her home and her dad shows her that the way he thinks of her, the way he treats her hasn't changed. He holds himself as being in the right and he holds his daughter as being personally responsible for the abuse and the struggles she's been through and he offers no real genuine apology, and so to Beau, that must feel like a wake-up call. Like a statement of "Oh, things are good now, sure, but I'm going to fuck things up. I'm always going to fuck things up and if I dont they'll fall apart anyways." I think that conversation makes her take everything she holds dear now and view it as just as fleeting and uncertain and conditional as her parents' approval.

And she's Beau, she loves people, she's always loved so hard that's the reason for the walls and the anger and the pushing people away. So since she has to leave, because things will go wrong anyway, she may as well do it in a way that helps the people she cares about. She may as well do it in a way that saves her friend, that prevents anyone else from sacrificing anything, because they have a shot at happiness but she doesn't think she does. She goes into that room prepared to give everything up and walk away because she thinks its inevitable and she wants to use it while it's still her choice to leave, as a last action to help the people she loves. 

And then she fails. Jester goes in, tricks the witch, gets then all out of there without a sacrifice. And now Beau is left here, rawer and more open emotionally than she's ever allowed herself to be because she's leaving and this is supposed to be a goodbye and letting the M9 know the extent of her love for them and her hatred for herself was only supposed to be a last action before she never saw them again, but now they know and shes still here.

And now, they're all gonna actually have to deal with it. And I cant wait for someone to actually sit Beau down, take to the remainder of those emotional walls with a fricking wrecking ball, and talk.

[bigowlenergy]

📂 i love your headcanons, btw, for some reason i always go "that makes SO MUCH SENSE"

thank u i feel incredibly valid rn good to know we vibe bro.

how about some melanie king content on this day? i think we need it

i saw a single hc about cantonese melanie and i lost my mind. during the early episodes i was seeing her as the white woman in the cast, and there is value in her defensive anger and unquiet rage in that space, but i was never invested in that for her. but then my mind was enhanced and now i see the light and i love melanie king even more.

under the cut bc its long:

i think the post was talking about ‘king’ being a possible romanization of ‘qing’ and thats cool, but i heard the words cantonese melanie and i fixated on her first name. i know that this is a british setting, but in america, many - and all that ive met at least - asian-americans or visa students or longterm visitors with a culturally chinese/korean name often choose an ‘american name’ to be called by instead. the sounds in those language do not exist in english, and the sheer amount of labor that would be expected on the part of the asian person to teach every single non-asian how to pronounce their name would be ridiculous. not worth it.

melanie king as a name has very much the same feeling about it. and the way she’s protective of her name? its not mel. its not melly. her name is melanie only bc thats the name she chose and u better damn well respect it.

and this puts her anger and her defensiveness and her solo fight to get to the top in a much more understandable light. the stereotype of asian woman in a white mans world gets kicked to the curb by her personally on a daily basis. shes in a disadvantaged position from the get-go and shes had nothing but time to get angry about it, to learn to be untrusting and defensive, and to not want to take even an ounce of shit from anyone.

theres also the fact that shes wlw that compounds on this. whether shes butch or femme or not on the social presentation spectrum that way, there are stereotypes waiting in the wings for her to contend with. femme? well yeah of course she is, shes a cute little asian woman, she HAS to be cute and wear pink and look socially soft and submissive, as femme is perceived by outsiders. butch? wow, an angry tomboy asian woman associated with knives, she MUST know self defense and enjoy violence and hate men. that shit sucks, and sometimes it feels like u cant possibly win.

whatever she chooses for herself, she is going into it with the expectations of needing to defend her own existence and individuality. of course she’s angry. of course she loves that anger that surprises people, that lets her get her tiny advantages where she can. of course she feels like shes on her own and only has her own strength of will to rely on - she does. the system of the world made it that way and melanie is going to fight it with her own two hands

and the way her second meeting with jon went? the immediate rage upon thinking that he might be trying to gaslight her? sure, shes got the bullet at that time, but that is the reaction of someone used to having her attempts to get her own show, her own respect, her own experiences, met with racist gaslighting minimizing her own abilities and hard work and interests in not simply being the ‘asian expert’ on chinese ghost myths or something. she was PISSED and did not listen to another word he tried to say.

and then elias hired her. not for the songling center, not to specifically handle the asian section, he hired her to the archive of the entire building bc he knew about her show and was impressed by her own dedicated researching at the library. an older white academic male authority recognized melanie king as worthy of respect. that must have been SO validating. and then, of course, came THAT reveal.

i also hc her as having lasting knee issues from the bullet - more like a brace situation with a cane side deal.

anyway, i love femme wlw cantonese melanie king i will stan her forever