2bit-sunshine

[2bit-sunshine]

I scratched my inner ear so hard I remembered an ancient dream

[2bit-sunshine]

sex pollen is an integral part of the fanfiction ecosystem but i just don't think poison ivy would make anything that encourages procreation of even more humans. unless she figures out how to make the sex pollen same-sex specific or fertility-negating she's not making it at all. #philosophical

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[2bit-sunshine]

the paul mccartney is dead conspiracy theory is the funniest thing in the world because i feel like if he did die and the beatles did replace him like parents replace a gold fish and the new guy managed to look exactly like him and play left handed bass, piano, and vocals in the same style and produce the same quality of music consistently for 30+ years then it'd be honestly rude to mention it at that point. like he's earned it let him have it

[2bit-sunshine]

There's GOTTA be a better angle for this.

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can i come over and pour sunlight into the darkest parts of u

[2bit-sunshine]

and in 3037, the Smeef United Federation broke their end of the GNOMA Agreement when their soldiers engaged in what would be known as "Elf Tactics". not a single strawberry remained un-squished, and over three brave butterflies lost their lives.

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The modern character of Frankenstein is so divorced from the source material that it's hard to even know how to classify it. Like any new Frankenstein character that comes out isn't even a retelling or an interpretation anymore, that character has been completely fabricated, like tons of little bits of old forgotten media have been stitched together to make the version of him we know today, it's like, it's almost like he's been like... well I can't think of a word but you get what I mean

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"I asked ChatGPT" well I asked Hermaeus Mora and that's why I'm trapped in Apocrypha for all eternity

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With the rousing success of princesses and knights, the next big pseudo-medieval sexual fixation will be: [draws name from a big box] Barber-Surgeons! Let's give it up for barber surgeons!

[2bit-sunshine]

women’s bodies weren’t “made” to do anything, nature didn’t “intend” anything, no human action is “unnatural” and there is no inherent “purpose” to a human life

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I’ve mentioned them a few times previously, but I just wanted to take a minute to talk about my favourite player species from Starfinder 1e:

Sarcesians.

Supposedly descended from the inhabitants of the two planets whose destruction long ago formed the Diaspora asteroid belt, sarcesians have adapted to low-gravity and thinair environments. Standing between 10 and 15 feet tall with bulbous eyes and spindly, elongated limbs, a sarcesian is able to adapt her physiology to survive in space by suspending her respiration and growing a pair of butterfly-like wings made of pure light. The wings act as solar sails, catching currents of radiation to propel her between the handful of inhabited asteroids and space platforms within the Diaspora. Thanks to arcane engines left behind by the sarcesians’ ancestors, the race has long managed to maintain creche worlds—asteroids with enough magical atmosphere, gravity, and warmth for the inhabitants to live comfortably and raise offspring. Compared to some other planets in the Golarion system, sarcesian creche worlds are beautiful and idyllic. They contain fields, forests, hills, lakes, and bucolic towns whose populations number in the low thousands. Many of these sanctuaries are linked by the River Between, an unusual body of water that actually flows between and through the asteroids; the water is prevented from floating off into space by a tube-shaped force field crafted by unknown hands. Sarcesians who leave the asteroid belt are sometimes hired as mercenaries specializing in surveillance and marksmanship, as they are accustomed to operating at vast distances from their targets. These sarcesians hone their innate patience even further in order to lie in wait for their marks for days atop bluffs, in dilapidated apartments, or even in the vacuum of space outside docking slips. Employers tend to pay well for this degree of dedication, making sarcesian snipers a highly sought-after commodity in certain areas of the galaxy.

--- Starfinder Alien Archive (2017)

The Diaspora is far and away my favourite of the Pact Worlds system. (Asteroid belt! Asteroid miners! Space pirates! Robot underground railroad! Space dwarves! Space rats with salvaged warships-turned-truck-stops! Cults of Nyarlathotep! Mysterious rivers contained by force fields flowing through space! Ships graveyards!) Like. There is truly nothing about the asteroid belt that I don’t fervently love. Absolutely fantastic setting, ten million out of ten, no notes. And the native species of the Diaspora is the sarcesians. And I absolutely love them.

They’re incredibly tall, spindly, lanky, grey-faced space giants from two shattered worlds who adapted to suddenly inhabiting vacuum with spectacular adroitness. They got a superweapon surprise from friendly neighbouring Eox, coughed a bit, walked it off, and are now chilling on idyllic asteroid creche worlds and hiring themselves out as fucking long range space snipers because they’re both used to operating in the vast distances of the vacuum of space, and also incredibly patient, which is my absolute favourite threatening trait to give a culture.

And I just … the wings. They can sprout solar sails while in the void to fly themselves to safety. They can suspend respiration and survive temporarily unprotected in vacuum. I don’t know what it is about space that makes me so paranoid, but there won’t be no explosive decompression for this space sniper! No sir! If your ship takes a direct hit to crew quarters while you were napping, provided the explosion itself doesn’t kill you, you can just fly yourself out of there and look for an intact section of ship to hook back into. It’s such an excellent insurance policy, and also so pretty. Golden solar sails to fly you to safety. So gorgeous.

Also it’s just … such an image, you know? That bit about the sarcesian sniper hanging in vacuum outside a space docking slip waiting for their target. The grey, silent figure hanging serene and deadly against the vast backdrop of space. They’re terrifying, and spectacular, and they make me want to play a sarcesian operative on a fucking space heist crew. The insurance policy sitting on the exterior of the space station waiting patiently for their cue. Heh.

I love them. I just really really love them. Sarcesians are unquestionably one of the coolest species in a setting that has no shortage of really cool species.

Also, Diaspora for the win! Absolute favourite part of the setting.

[2bit-sunshine]

i do believe on some level that real love is ugly. i think we’ve convinced ourselves otherwise by ingesting highly filtered staged moments of other people’s relationships and telling ourselves that maybe we are too ugly for love. but real love — it’s waking up in the dead of morning with dried drool on your face, it’s bleeding in a bed that isn’t yours, it’s having a panic attack in the park and not knowing how to verbalize what you’re feeling, it’s not shaving + not apologizing, it’s crying because you need something you cannot name + much more — all while being held.

[2bit-sunshine]

*through gritted teeth* the world is GOOD. people are kind. Humans are NOT inheritly selfish. you will make it through this year. recovery is possible. people you don't know yet will love you. You are going to do things you can't even imagine right now. You are going to read a rlly good book. You are going to eat some rlly good food. You are going to experience joy again. Things can get better. Situations can change. You can choose to be kinder. The world can change for the better.

[2bit-sunshine]

If I ever wrote a superhero story I’d want there to be a recurring shitty C-list supervillain in the background whose power was changing something’s colour and all her villainous plots would be colour-themed things like “If the city council doesn’t give me a million dollars, I will turn the city of GREEN Bay into the city of RED Bay!” and she’d turn the Golden Gate Bridge magenta or whatever.

So it’s all low-stakes villainy, but everyone absolutely hates fighting her because her very shitty superpower works really really well, and there are dozens of background characters who’ve fought her that are just permanently green now