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rxttenfish · 6 months ago

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Asking because I’m extremely curious about this, how did MonProm’s writing get different over time? I remember you saying that the lore and characters feel different, and that it's missing sincere character interactions, too. I know almost nothing about the lore and I’ve only seen a few people mention the characters, so I’d be interested in a rundown of what aspects you think got worse in the series

I wouldn’t mind a very long response since I’m not that active in the fandom, I need to catch up on what happened

sorry for taking so long to answer this! i kinda waffled on it for a long bit, mainly because i started doubting myself again, and whether or not this was me simply overreacting or being tinted by nostalgia or simply being extremely picky and choosy in what i like (the last of which is true, i seldom get into fandoms at all for this reason and stay away from most popular media, but i wasn't sure if it applied here). i've posted about it already, but i'm in the middle of a psychotic episode where i can't feel a lot of pleasure to begin with + most things i do experience ending up solidly in the "very bad" category, so as you can imagine, i really didn't want to mislead and check that i was actually in objective reality.

as it is, this is also when a lot more screenshots started to be posted in the monster prom tag, and that helped me bridge the gap back into returning to the games themselves and feel like i was making a more accurate judgement. if you're one of those people who have been posting screenshots, i sincerely thank you, and i appreciated seeing you in the tag greatly.

for those not in the know — i've been in the monster prom fandom since it first released, prior to even the first additional ending to be added (the "Punch the sun" ending, and i recall the minor fandom drama that happened at that time due to it). my impression of monster prom is very much influenced by this, as what got me into the first game was the fact that the characters genuinely seemed to care for each other and were friends with each other (not merely tolerating each other's presences nor dressing it up, they sincerely thought of each other as friends and were open about that fact), on top of the wide variety of small details and statements that, if taken at face value, could create compounding complexity in the lives of each and every character and had wider implications for their lives.

no, they were not necessarily explored nor even necessarily "real", with so many conflicting events and statements, but i liked this too, because it meant a wider flexibility in what you could imagine, helping to create a more tailored experience for everyone who thought about these characters. this was what i liked about the early fandom too. what was baseline "canon" was so vague and minimal that you could have wildly different interpretations of the same characters' histories and relationships with each other. you would have radically different perspectives on what the world itself looked like, what it was like, that there wasn't really any wrong answers so long as their personalities remained the same. this is where you got the old headcanon of polly and liam being childhood friends who knew each other as humans, or that the world of monster prom was post-apocalypse where humanity itself had gone extinct or only existed in tiny pockets, or my personal headcanon that both monster and human society existed right next to each other and had minimal crossover for petty cultural reasons. this was also prior zoe-as-ro, and there were wildly different interpretations of zoe's personality, with most going for a far more disquieting creepy-cute than the deep nerd we got.

this is why you get stuff like the timeloop theory, where everyone is repeating the same weeks leading up to prom over and over, and are perhaps vaguely aware of it but broadly unconcerned. this is also why it felt like the joke that, the characters were still in high school but were all fully legal adults with most in their 20's, best landed, because it was absurd and strange and didn't quite make sense, but the world itself was inherently absurd and semi-malleable to begin with. realistically, i felt like everyone understood it was making fun of the trope of having adults play teenagers in american sitcoms and wildly casting outside the age range, but for more in-universe explanations it wasn't any different from the way that you would have a large, dramatic ending in which everything changed, but then you'd restart and everyone would be right back at the beginning with nothing different, or even having conflicting events in the same run. it was a dream-logic that fit with the tropes and, thus, diagetically made sense.

to be clear, i don't mind canon having a set, well, canon on which it refers back to itself. i don't mind expanding that or including more things which are set in stone. but there was a perceivable shift in how the games handled this over time, becoming a lot more... bitter, it felt, towards all of these different branching ideas and concepts that, yeah, the people making them knew wouldn't necessarily be "canon" because "canon" already liked to contradict itself so much. most people weren't even sold on any one idea, and there was a much greater sense of enjoying and appreciating all the varying ideas people would come up with even if you personally didn't share them. making the characters be out of character was the real crime, because then it didn't diagetically make sense in the same way, didn't wholly fit.

(again, this is not to say fanon didn't happen and characters weren't smoothed down into a simplified personality that fit these varying fan-interpretations instead of the game itself. certainly damien love/lust was just as bad as it had ever been, and everyone loved to mangle his character into a more stereotypical "bad boy with a heart of hold" all the time. but it certainly felt less set-in-stone about it than it does now, with any deviation from the norm being considered strange and odd and even broadly shunned from the wider fandom.)

all of this is setup for establishing what the writing, lore, and characters felt like in the earlier days. the characters were the strongest part, with their relationships to each other being equally as important. the lore played it fast and loose and was far less interested in setting anything in concrete because that wasn't the important part. the lore wasn't the important part, which was what made it all the more intoxicating to think about, all the more fun to play with.

montrip is easily the biggest offender when it comes to setting everything in all-or-nothing terms and demanding absolutism from the world. broadly i blame the hitchhiker conversations for the worst of it, but i think ultimately the way they handled the entire premise of the game is where this problem stems from. it's not really an exploration in the same sense that you might explore the first game, discovering different perspectives and different people with different relationships to each other. it's an exploration in the sense of a sequel that over-explains the monster, that takes the most boring option out of all those that were possible and floating around and settles on something that was blatant, obvious, typically rejected not because of how novel it is but how trite and par for the course it is in the rest of the genre.

yeah, okay. humans know nothing about monsters and there's a "monster dimension" that exists separately from the human dimension. there's no crossover between the two of them. of course there's a big grand-scale fight between the eldritch powers that zoe used to be a part of, from which not only are slayers the main organization against them, but also the merkingdom has some horse in this race too. it's an urge to make things so universal in explaining them, in revealing connecting threads which unite everything that's ever happened in here, that makes the worldbuilding and lore immediately much more boring than it ever was before.

and it didn't have to be this way! nothing in the first game contradicts any of this too explicitly (see the above, the first game loves to contradict itself), and i would even be happy if this was basically canon but never stated or confirmed to be the big overarching everything going on underneath it all. i believe you should probably know these things about any world that you create and have them in the back of your mind. the difference is that you can know these things and keep them in mind, even focusing on things where its very relevant, and still not reveal them. this is why you have lore bibles, after all. every horror writer knows exactly how their monster works and the full underlying reason for everything that happens, but that doesn't mean the audience will see it or possess this same information too, and leaving it intentionally obscure will make far better stories.

which, this is bad enough, but it wouldn't be the breaking point for me if this was all there was.

but the worst thing of all has to be the slow decay of the very same characters that sold me on this world, this lore, this game in the first place. monster prom is nothing without the characters in it. it's a dating sim, it has nothing but characters to get you to play, and liking these characters are the entire reason anyone would pick up monster prom in the first place.

and the first game pulls this off extremely well. it's all in the tagline: be your worst self. they are, indeed, all terrible people. yes, even that character that you just thought of right now. they all have points in the game where they commit atrocities, where they kill or hurt people, where they do inexcusable things that could not be ignored in a more serious setting.

but that's the point. i think there's something very powerful in creating a character who not only do you love and love their personality and the way they interact with the world, but who also are inapologetically terrible, and to have the humor and the charisma be so good that you don't get bogged down in the "this is awful". likewise, it never feels the urge to really go out of its way to justify what's going on. this is not to say theres no discussion of if someone "deserved it", but usually there's still the sense that the joke is on them, that this is still an extreme reaction specifically for comedy and not necessarily something that can be justified. you can have damien set leonard on fire and have it feel earned, without prompting the needed reaction of what it's actually like to watch someone burn to death.

this is what sets the prank masterz ending apart from the rest of the game, and really establishes it as the first real "bad ending". because nothing that you do or happens in the prank masterz ending is any different from anything else that happens in any other run. you summon evil beings from other dimensions as a throwaway gag on how visiting one location raises your stats. you kill other people and damn them to terrible fates. you watch as body horror happens. the only difference is that, in the prank masterz ending, the laugh track doesn't play.

the rest of the game and the writing echoes this philosophy, this careful interplay of tropes that keeps everything tongue in cheek and yet sincere enough to make sure emotional beats still land when they're needed. the characters feel true to themselves and their own emotions, even when the world is extreme and excessive, when everything else runs on comedy logic.

this is also what i noticed failing first as time went on.

like i said, fanon has always existed and there's always been very specific ideas as to what characters are like in the same way fanon always flattens down characters into the same tropes over and over. scott is stupid and innocent and doesn't know what sex is. damien is violent and hot and too cool for anyone else. miranda is the idiot girl character. repeat over and over and over until you get sick of it.

but it's been an issue as time has crept on that canon has started to approach fanon and began to merge with it. now, scott is so innocent that he can't even curse. polly starts being mean to her friends and saying things that would be very hurtful to hear. the merkingdom isn't really super evil and fucked up, it's just miranda that's like that. they become simpler, easier to digest, streamlined for social media posts and mass-sharing. they become less and less subversions of existing tropes and moreso just another example of them, something else to add to the collection, not their own individual stories.

even further from this, what more complex traits they had are now stated and not shown. polly is stated to be smart and clever in a way that her party girl persona doesn't imply and to be sincerely rather down to earth with the people she cares about, but we seldom ever see this anymore unless its the game specifically trying to make a point about it, in which case it won't let her do anything that implies cleverness and moreso will just outline it in the narration. vera is stated to care for people in a very genuine and heartfelt way, but seldom will get a chance to do so, and every opportunity for her to do so to their faces is missed while she will just outright state it later. it does not feel consistent, it does not feel like any of these are intended reads of their actions. it feels like the devs have something they want to do but no idea on how to actually do so. and forget it if you want these traits to manifest in small ways that show up in unrelated moments and scenes.

the dialogue becomes harder and harder to tell between each speaker, if you are just looking at what's said and not at the pictures attached to it. the characters' distinct voices have been eroded away, so that they speak more and more like each other, relaying the same terms and ideas in the same words. perspective becomes a suggestion, instead of a must.

this is something that started back in monster camp too, as all of the endings in that game felt ultimately the same as every other ending. it's very hard to place or define the full reason why, why there feels like there's no emotional stakes nor investment, why everything feels moreso like selecting different coats of paint and trying to find all the different ending pictures rather than being interested in exploring the characters as characters.

stranger yet, the series that started with the tagline of "be your worst self" has experienced a kind of... softening, for lack of a better word? what i mentioned about being able to handle the balance between terrible people who do terrible things and the light tone of the game starts to change, as abruptly the same characters who were down with violent murder in the first game start to lose their nerve, acting more and more on more typical morality. it's one of those things that feels like it's starting to damage the tone, as abruptly it's not as absurd as it used to be, demands less suspension of disbelief which could buffer and support the rest of the setting on it. there's even a part in one of the endings in montrip which involves current-polly and current-scott looking back on their monprom selves and reacting in horror at how violent and careless their pranks are, in a way that fundamentally felt like it was undercutting and disparaging all the things that felt fun and made monprom what it was.

which is odd, really, because more and more i feel like the characters in these games like each other less and less. the friendships and genuine enjoyment of each others company that brought me to this game in the first place has gone. now they don't mention each other as much, don't care for each other's feelings and reactions as much, aren't as willing to support each other. they are more and more found on their own, relied on their own, seem to seek out contact and interaction with their own friends less and less. it feels like they're all separating out into their own worlds, but also feels like they wouldn't willingly want to interact with each other if they weren't already forced together by some other outside contrivance.

if anything, i'd compare it to every other dating sim out there, where you, the player, are the most important person in these characters' lives, and they only feel ambivalent or antagonistic towards every other character. which, again, is not why i picked up monster prom or why i liked it so much in the first place.

and it's because of this that it feels like the current state of the series has to focus on its increasingly weak worldbuilding and lore, trying to form a more serious foundation without character relationships being so tightly bound together, without the characters themselves being more developed and rich, without an aspect of absurd humor to rely on.

more and more i've noticed monprom has to rely on referencing other series to make itself funny and create humor, which, again, it's always done. it was just easier to ignore back then, if you didn't know what was being referenced, because there was always more going on in the exact same scene to bolster it and give context clues as to the setup and punchline at play. it feels like the current games are much more dependent on you knowing pop culture references in order to have any fun with it, and i'm someone who, again, is very picky in what i like or what i'll seek out. i'm not interested in a stream of references about other things that i would much rather be doing than playing through a game that feels like it hates that i like it at all, when i could, again, just be engaging with the thing that takes itself seriously and knows what it wants.

#all the care guide says is 'biomass'#monster prom #asks #vanillabeenflower #this is. so long i am so sorry.#and its still not my entire thoughts because i have so many thoughts #this is an unedited ramble tbh and im very sorry for that #i have more complaints like #how fucking snide and condescending the narration is to its own characters #which it already had but gets even worse in the later games #which is why despite loving aaravi i dont want to play moncamp at all #where a character says they like something or feel something and the narration has to be so. sarcastic about it?#like how i mentioned about how it feels like how its looking down on them as people #instead of whats probably the intended read which is #more jokingly calling them dumb in an affectionate way like how you might do with friends #and ofc theres the whole miranda rant #i hate what theyve done with the merkingdom and i HATE adrien as a concept i wont lie #just. cool. this female character is too stupid to count as a lore character. we obviously need a MALE character to fill in instead #we cant just have miranda talk about this or center any of the other female characters #and how they feel about this and whats going on for them #no we need to make up a new man to talk to instead #im. im still really bitter about it i wont lie.#like i said i could go on and get way more specific about it #i just feel like any and all emotional weight to this has died and the characters are more and more obviously actors on a stage #for your own self gratification rather than their own people living their own lives #this is so bitter and i really shouldnt put this in the main tag #i am so sorry everyone who will see my rant. but my peace must be made.#dont worry im already asking myself if im just making all this shit up myself #what if some of us liked that the characters were so mean to the player and had no qualms about aggressively rejecting us #because it gave some illusion of them being able to make their own choices and decisions in what they wanted

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martyrbat · 5 months ago

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habeas corpus – detective comics #1086

(ID in alt!)

#loved this back up feature so much and seeing that bruce timm shit made me annoyed enough to actually transcribe it #first the way hes depicted as having to stand trial and ARGUE and fight for the rights of using the coin #rather than it just being a compulsion and something he must do before a decision....#like every time. every time when he's 'leaving it up to chance'—thats a time when harvey won. thats a time when harvey fought for the right #to use the coin and make it at least a 50/50 chance instead of 'crawling away until the hard part is done' like two face pushed for #every single time. regardless of the results regardless of knowing theres only a halfway chance of it actually achieving anything #or lessening the damage two face can/will do. every time hes fighting for and still believing in a fair trial and that everyone deserves on #it isnt him being weak. it isnt him avoiding responsibility. its him fighting and forcing and pushing for it as hes internally at war #with himself 24/7. even when two face wins he doesnt give up & continues to fight for what he believes in despite the injustice done to him #the way he tells Judge Janus that it isnt about HIM (himself!) while defending the right of existence to the jury of other societal rejects #the way he gestures to himself only at the very end. he asks the judge does that sound like anyone he knows and janus replies in two faces #voice but harvey keeps going. he keeps fighting for others. but at the end in actually acknowledging two face being part of him #(and by extension harvey being part of two face) and how harvey is fighting just as much to have a place as two face is #(but more within his own mind & upholding his belief system still despite knowing how it continues to fail them) and just FUCK #and two faces snaps! how theres no jurisprudence system above there either ! just no one will admit it!#how harvey knows!!! look what happened to him when he was doing the right thing!#look how many criminals and mob bosses paid their way out! look how the police are corrupt!#but still believing in it and how a system has to be in place despite being a direct victim of it as well and just GOD #I LOVE YOU GOOD HEARTED AND WANTING TO HELP PEOPLE HARVEY DENT YOU WILL ALWAYS BE FAMOUS TO ME !!!!!!!!#taking away how he genuinely wanted to help people and bring wrongs to rights takes away literally everything hes built on #it takes away the entire fucking tragedy of his character (and in many ways it changes how bruce himself operates and believes because #harvey WAS a good man doing everything by the books. he was trying to bring justice in the 'right way' and believed in the system. he was #what people tell bruce he should be and look where it got him. look how the system failed 'even the good ones' because the system itself is #corrupt. it isnt flawed—it was operated to oppress and thats why it cant just be fixed but must be entirely rebuilt and why bruce must #operate outside of it. it also gives more depth because harvey is one of batmans first and biggest failures. he didnt protect him.#he didnt save his parents as a helpless child (as bruce) but he couldn't save his parents as BATMAN.#it wasnt just random chance like his parents tragedy but this was calculated and something bruce didnt stop. its ALWAYS going to eat at #him if he could of prevented it by telling harvey his identity. by doing something different. by being more prepared or somehow #knowing it was going to happen. harvey is the face of tragedy in so many ways that cant fit in these messy rambly tags but its ALLL!!!!!!!#bc harv was (and still is despite it all! despite two face!) a good man!! because he originally was a glimmer of hope to bruce & the city!!

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get-more-bald · 2 months ago

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the biggest thing about X6 is not that he doesn't think of himself as human (though he doesn't, and according to some it's correct) BUT that he doesn't see himself as a Person

#searching through the X6-88 tag on tumblr has not brought me joy #also. 1 thing about is that i hate hate hate the (i think) canon blue eyes he has. like. for fucking what #1st i saw them on tumblr and thought 'well thats stupid. whyd you give him blue eyes? so hed look special? thats weird. at least its uncanon #also. on god. i saw some post headcanoning the companions' appearances and it was p cool UNTIL they got to x6 #and they gave him grey 'almost white' eyes for literally no reason. like if you want to go with the scary factor theres so many ways for it #but no. some people think that blue/grey eyes are sooo special. and for what #<- i have brown eyes but im not just being salty. it really sucks. i dont wanna be the one to call fandom racism but it does smell like it!#also like. i didnt want to go on a stupid tirade about racism in the tags again but the way fandom treats x6 AND preston is just upsetting #other people have made some very good points about it and im not going to repeat them here (also noones gonna read this)#but like... theres 3 'main' black characters that i remember: preston garvey (whom the stron majority of the fandom hates/disliked)#x6-88 (basically the players slave? also hated for being mean and unfeeling (which is justified imo). no quest no freedom no nothing)#and gloria (who i havent met in game but ive heard some actual criticisms of (like. the way shes treated ingame) and noone else talks about)#if theres any other Named and Important characters. sorry but i literally do not remember them #coming back to x6 being justified in being unemotional/mean. he was literally raised this way. he doesnt consider himself to be a person #being he was made that way. he is a Thing and hes meant for one job and hes made to inspire fear #and hes not supposed to have emotions so he just. doesnt. if he does he cant express them anyways #1 if fallout4 was a better written game (or 2 if x6 was white) i think thered be SO much fanfiction about him. the possibilities are endless #i have something brewing in the back of my head. i might start writing even though i suck and its going to be bad #ANYWAYS. general fandom thought on x6 are WRONG and im being a HATER. fuck everyone who doesn't like x6. if you dont like x6 get off tumblr #especially if you like gage but not x6. leave fr #i just woke up wtf am i doingggg

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doveotion · 18 days ago

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Being self aware is literally hell I wouldn't wish this on my worst enemy

#diary #god I could rant about about this forever #tw mentions of assault in the tags dont read if that makes u uncomfortable #im kinda getting tired of people asking why i dont date 🤩 it sends me into a mental spiral hahahaaaaa #i just tell people im not looking for anything serious rn but its a big fat fucking lie because i DO want to date #but i think my nervous system is so shot from living with my dad still and he can be so emotionally abusive it's insane #it makes me not trust my judgement because shitty behavior is so normalized and i KNOW whats Right and Wrong but im so used to keeping the–#–peace because its a survival tactic for me and always has been #like when people like me i think one of two things usually:#1) they're genuinely interested in me and i hate myself so much i cant understand why anyone would like me #or 2) theyre interested in me for my body which is both easier to understand and terrifying because people in the past have hurt me because–#–they wanted to be with me. read between the lines for that one #because of how i grew up and what I've experienced i genuinely do not trust people. i trust no one fully and it kills me #i feel so fucking guilty all the time bc most people arent out to get you but that wasn't the case for me #i feel like i cant grow as a person because im stuck in a survival mindset. i KNOW why I people please and i hate it #i genuinely do love people and i want the best for them but its also ingrained into my head that if something is wrong it's My Fault #and there will be Consequences #back to dating though #there are so many reasons I do and dont want to date #i call myself a Helpless Romantic because there's no way I'll be dating in the near future. i cant just go on dates I have to know you for–#–a while and build trust. but what if it ends badly and im the idiot who cant take a goddamn hint and realise love isnt meant for someone–#–like me?#i grew up knowing my parents hated each other and “stayed together for the kids” whatever thet means. like that fucks with your mind #seeing my mom being mistreated by my dad made me snap out of the disney movie princess x prince charming daze everyone else was in as a kid #i realised very early on that relationships won't save you and can actually be the worst thing to ever happen to someone #theres more to this but ive already said enough lol. anyway

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toytulini · 1 year ago

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starting the day off Wrong with. nerds gummy clusters for breakfast,

#toy txt post #i will regret this #(half joking) specifically to spite that post telling me i Have eat a vegetable #i recognize its True. i dont even personally particularly have trouble w vegetables. i like a good number of vegetables in different ways #but something about it is scraping its nails down the chalkboard the wrong way for me #i cant tell you how i would prefer a post like that to be worded. but smth about it pisses me off idk #im vagueing and idk if i could even find the post but like. i really love op being like 'im saying this in the gentlest way possible' and #then u check the notes and their replies to ppl saying no they dont want to is 'die then' and i cant even blame them for that. it has #many notes im sure theyre out of patience to keep being Gentle. but smth about it is just. Grating #i am not sure theres One good way to get picky eaters to try new foods but god that post is Not vibing with me #i want you all to know im being sooo strong rn ive seen it on my dash TWICE and resisted the urge to reblog it w stupid spiteful shit in the #tags lol. im being so strong. im resisting. im making my own post to say stupid shit in the tags #also god it is such a good thing i already like vegetables bc some of the shit ppl are reccomending in the notes.................#🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢🤢#LIKE to each their own if thats what works then go off everyone likes different things but also oh my fucking god some of that #is like the grossest shit. i am not putting fucking cheese on anything are you insane. creamy soups???? you want me to eat CREAMY SOUPS???#A L F R E D O S A U C E ?????? if thats what it takes yall then go wild but asgajgudvakgeuvuw could NOT be me and that is OKAY #im allowed to dislike things that others like and youre allowed to like things i find. detestable. do not take it personally #keep in mind i find so many things detestable it is Not fucking personal. except sauerkraut. that shit is a hatecrime against me personally #<-joking it is a joke. (its not) it is a joke. keep sauerkraut away from me tho please im dying squirtle #if your method of keeping it away from me is to eat it all and go oooo that was so yummy thats fine. whatever it takes #i do wonder about the ppl suggesting to pickle things to consume vegetables #dont get me wrong i am pro pickles as hell i go insane for pickles. however. im not sure they count as a 'vegetable' from a nutrient #standpoint? also the person in the notes being sad they have a hard time eating vegetables and being like wah i cant eat anything but pizza #i want that person to know pizza is vegetables. YES get off my ass tomato is botanically a fruit shut up vegetables arent real #its all fruit or leafs or seeds. pizza is a vegetable. hell especially if you can put veggie toppings on there instead if just eating plain #cheese pizza like me. thats vegetable. idk how to help ppl who have issues w veggies Texturally bc i Love vegetable textures theyre so much #nicer to me than meat texture. fruit textures also my beloved. unless they arent. bananas love to play games #if its taste thats the issue tho i say find a sauce u like and go crazy. douse it in sauce til its just vegetable texture that tastes like #yummy sauce

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collecting--stardust · 2 years ago

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I was tagged by @gxtzeizm! Thank you so much 🫶🫶🫶💕💕💕

I got two bingo 🥰 Actually I do listen to mamamoo, blackpink, newjeans and wanna one too but I only have a few of their songs in my phone so I didn't ticked it. But happy to find someone who has a superior taste too 😌

I'm tagging @tsuchansworld, @worldchampionpeccobagnaia and whoever that wants to do it! (I don't know if any of my other mutuals or anyone else listen to kpop or what type of songs they listen to so I don't know if I should tag them or not hhh But do let me know if you want to do it and I will tag you 💗) Of course you can ignore this if you don't want to do it!

#i only know welcome to the black parade and ghost of you for mcr #and ive never heard about the oral cigarettes before.. will check them out later when i got time and in the mood for new groups to get into #theres so many other awesome artists out there i didnt include like nina nesbitt 30 seconds to mars plaza two feet etc #and im a huge multistan whos been listening to kpop since 2008 so yeah i just cant fit in everyone :(#would love to know everyone's music taste tho!! always up to listen to new bops and discover more awesome artists 😚#not really an opinion since its a genuine question but i dont have a. tag for that #i swear i have a tag for when i get tagged.. i will hunt it down later #touch and you're it 🥷#FOUND IT

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nomairuins · 3 months ago

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my tags on that went on for so long i had to go back and edit them to fit tag limit and i still had to delete a bunch of them. Its the autism it literally is

#funerary practices and the afterlife and body disposal methods and just. grief and mourning in general r like. My bigggg autism thing i dont #talk abt it a lot bc 1 i just Dont shut up once i get going 2 a lot of ppl dont want to hear abt stuff like that which is fine. kicked pupp #expression. i just find it very very interesting to see how different ppl grieve and whats considered like. Right and wrong when it comes t #care of the body yk. bc like. most/every culture has their practices and anything outside of that feels wrong to them bc its like. yk its s #pivotal idr the exact anecdote/story but caitlin doughty mentioned it in one of her books where like. there were 2 groups and one cremated #their dead and the other practiced mortuary cannibalism and both viewed the other as barbaric and it rly shaped how i view it like. yk. its #rly something so personal where even when the way someone grieves makes you uncomfortable its like. you cant force someone to grieve in a #way thats palatable to you. yk. for a rly long time washing the body and being with the body after death was a rly important part of grief #in like. usamerican culture its only more recently that it became wayyy less common w the rise of funeral homes and stuff. and obv for many #ppl that wouldnt be comforting but i think it could be for a lot of ppl..#my personal belief on it is everyone should be allowed to grieve and dispose of the dead As they want and that should be like. yk. theres #the nebulous term of Desecration which is legally rly difficult to define there r a lot of states where the law is 'if it would outrage #normal family values' which is just so fucking stupid obviously like. whos family. bc every single person has a different view on whats #appropriate yk... IDK. i think as long as its relatively safe for the living and as long as its not like. Against the wishes of the decease #like. if someone says they want a burial and then theyre cremated (not out of necessity like 4 financial stuff) im like. yk. obv theyre dea #but i think its important to honor their last wishes... yk. and that should go for like. If someone wants an open pyre cremation that shoul #be available... if someone wants aquamation etc. IDK. etc. like. another thing is with embalming while i wish it werent De Facto ppl r #railroaded into it i entirely disagree w ppl who say it should be wiped out entirely like. there r environmental ramifications 4 sure and i #love for that to be more like. talked abt... but embalming is rly important to a lot of ppl and idt its right to shit all over that. idt it #necessary for every death i personally dont see the point of embalming for like. a peaceful death with a quick funeral and theyre getting #cremated after. but ik like. for a lot of black families embalming is very important for like. a reclamation esp in violent or traumatic #deaths its very important to have like. a funeral with a viewing. and i think thats something that shouldnt be taken away from anyone ever.#even like. ik this is controversial but extreme embalming w/ posing and stuff as long as thats what the decease wanted like. i think its #awesome !! i Dont agree w taking the corpses of the poor or disenfranchised to prop up for art pieces Personally but like. there r ppl who #want to be displayed like that like. riding their motorcycle one last time or ummm. that posthumous concert that happened. i get how it can #seem morbid or wtvr but like. the families r happy with that its what those ppl wanted and it like. its a celebration of their life and #their interests and i think thats super important. BASICALLY.#ok tag limits coming so im cutting myself off for sure this time. but wtvr. i hope this makes sense to anybody else sorry i rambled. im ver #passionate abt it KJBADKJBDKJ

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gigifujijifu · 3 months ago

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Ok so I first wrote a mess in the tags but by the end of it I realized the actual answer, for me, is not just following impulses for who I want to play but also: spreadsheets.

My boyfriend and I make spreadsheets almost as a hobby. We have... a lot of alts, so to make it easier we have spreadsheets for things like which alts we've done holiday events on, and which trade-able cosmetics we've unlocked on who so we can pass extras around without having to log into everyone to check (not that I collect anything in a completionist sense with so many alts).

I also made a spreadsheet that lets us mark which WT stickers we need that week and it will flag which ones we have in common with each others alts so we can pair them off to do them more efficiently if we want.

I realize it's excessive but it's a kind of fun project and I love all of my characters and my bf dearly so playing with them no matter who I'm on or with is fun and there's always something to do.

people who have alts on ffxiv

how do you do it /g

#i have 19 characters #but some are concepts i havent developed past lvl 15 and others are npcs #so the real number is 11 #and of those 11 i only work on 6 regularly and of those 6 only three i consider to be WoLs #i stay on top of it by playing with my boyfriend (most of our characters pair off into duos for leveling/questing)#i tend to focus on very specific things i want to do on very specific characters based on their stories/personality/etc #like example: Rat is my main and original WoL and he is also from a family of woodworkers in ishgard #so it was very very very important to me that he be not only saint of the firmament but also number 1 on ranking for carpentry #and other alts i will aim for very specific glams or hairstyles. ill pass things on my 'main's to give to my alts if it fits them better #the less played alts still get dragged out for every holiday event - so during that time i glam them and gpose and adore them #rhika was shelved for years as a holiday alt. she is a heel at the uldah arena so seeing the arcadion got me wanting to play her REALLY BAD #so now im working on her #but mostly its just playing 1-2 mains and 2-3 alts and rotating who those 2-3 alts are #i also dont raid so theres that #the part that isnt fun though? ive done island sanctuary 4 times. i plan to do it at least two more times..........#re-aquiring some glamours and cosmetics is just needlessly tedious... this game is violently hostile toward players who enjoy alts #but i do it anyway because my characters are who they are #im the polar opposite of whatever is going on with fant addicts #the alt addict #i had to stop being a completionist. i dont want to do everythign on everyone #i just want to do what each character needs and is true for their character #sometimes that means saint of the firmament or farming a cassie earring or sometimes it just means grinding a specific mogtome or pvp rewar #choosing what to do and letting go of completionism is what let me do it tho #the only reason it wasnt an issue in wow was because rewards were all account-wide. SE catch up please gods #idk why i wrote all this in the tags...#im sleepy and cant formulate a proper response #also spreadsheets #we have so... so so many spreadsheets to track things for our characters it is. its a hobby.

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kneeanderthal · 1 year ago

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the awful balancing of story lines in season 4 always makes me tweak out a bit

#love most of them (not st*ncy...) but even if i did love all of them i cant because there is so much nothing #like so so so much screen time on pointless and unnecessary new arcs and then completely sidelining the good emotional arcs #and continuing to sideline the actaul main characters (lucas will jonathon mike etc) in favour of the fan favourites (st*ve)#UEGRH #idk everytime i watch s4 and i watch it alot because im unhealthily obsessed with this show im like eh..#because maxs and wills and lucas and even el and mikes relo drama is more emotionally enticing #then the same repeated dance of will they wont they (st*ncy) and the weird new personalites from s3 (joyce and hopper)#when i first watched it ESPECIALLY volume 2 i was trying hard to give a shit about the storylines that took literal hours hours to convey #and i dont hate the new characters but there are so so so many characters and not enough episodes for them to make sense #but also not take the spotlighr #this doesnt make much sense but basically maxs arc > wills arc > everyone else because theres so much nothing #the great stuff gets lost (els whole arc is so drawn out it overshadows itself)#i could literally go on for days about everything #but ill stop now #because these are the tags #and the post speaks enough for itself #stranger things #stranger things s4 #stranger things vol 1 #stranger things volume 2 #byler #< target audience #lucas sinclair #< also target audience because his storyline was so so so overshadowed by st*ve and all the other bullshit

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pixieskie · 11 months ago

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˖˚˳⊹"i really do love you.. im sorry"˖˚˳⊹

-warnings: Angst, depress!on, su!c!dal thoughts, detachment, scars, body dysmorphia, disassociation, not proofread, chubby reader. -chars mentioned: Scaramouche -wc: 0.6k -a/n: i dont even know what to say.. Um this is .. something.. enjoy?

masterlist

as someone who felt every emotion more intense than others, it also meant feeling more sad. it should've been fine but you simply couldn't feel happy.. you have friends and family but still felt so lonely..

“helloooo” scaramouche waved his hand infront of your face to get your attention.

Suddenly looking up, you see him frowning at you. “what’re you thinking so hard about.. do you not wanna watch the movie?”

“sorry.. i just spaced out” you said embarrassed.. “just continue the movie, ill pay attention this time”.. Scara simply muttered a small ‘fine’ and resumed it.

Scaramouche is your best friend, the one you share everything with. But.. he could never understand the depth of your emotions.. The void you feel inside.. The aching loneliness that consumes you at every moment.

“Yes lets go to the beach!! itll be perf....”

“ooh i just bought a new bikini…..”

“wont it be too sunny? ill get tanne….”

you drowned out their conversation and thought of excuses to skip… you had no other choice.. a bikini wouldn't cover your scars, stretch marks or tummy fat.. it would be on display for everyone to see your insecurities and then they'd hate you.

“guys im sorry but i have to study this weekend.. exams are close”

“again? but didnt you say the same last week…”

“oh come on! itll be so fun…”

“ugh she does the same everytime…”

Ofcourse they wouldn't understand.. They had the perfect body..

The words were blurred as you tried to read them.. Nothing made sense to you anymore.. Your exams were near and you have to study but the words together don't make sense anymore..

Sighing, you went to splash some water on your face to wake yourself up. Looking up into the mirror, you saw failure.. Someone who cant study.. Someone who wouldnt be able to make a living..

You sat back down at your desk.. You can study and change your future right? its just a book..

But.. you cant make yourself read the words anymore.. you felt so tired..

Why cant you also be like others?.. Everyone else is so successful and perfect.. They have good grades, perfect body and happy lives..

You sat on the edge of the roof.. This used to be your hang out spot with Scara but eventually you both stopped meeting there.

“where the fuc- YOURE HERE?” Scara dramatically sighed, huffing. “Ive been searching all over for you. Come on, ive made dinner.. you have to eat something”

You chucked softly at his caring nature and nodded silently.. “Scara?” he was about to leave but turned back to look at you “yeah?”

“I love you”

He chuckled in confusion “yeah yeah i get it, i love you too. no need to get all sentimental with me, its just dinner.”

You turned back to the sky once he left. He probably went to your kitchen to fill a plate for you..

You smiled at the thought. He was the best person you could've asked for..

And it hurts. He cared for you so much but you couldn't appreciate it..

Leaving never had to be this painful.. But a tear fell down and you closed your eyes, recounting your memories..

There were so many happy moments you never got to enjoy.. Sad moments you stayed numb.. And the huge gap in your memory.. and nobody knew how you felt because you never let them.

‘Im so tired… Im so tired..” You looked at your feet, dangling off the roof.. ‘i hate this .. i dont wanna do this.. but theres nothing else to be done’

You took a deep breath in.. “i really do love you.. im sorry”...

…..

tags: @rubywonu @stygianoir @unsavoy-melon @kashiiwi @babbledabble25

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kazehita · 7 months ago

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hi! i noticed your recent post recommending the fic natural satellite and i think i've noticed other isat fics around your blog too. because of that, i was wondering if you had a list of recommended isat fics! i will admit i am not someone who just peruses around on ao3 but i love reading about these characters so if you have any recs, i would greatly appreciate them! thanks and i hope you have a lovely day :3

I love ALL isat fic - each and every one is so special and wonderful - but if I listed the whole archive that wouldn't really help huh... So! Im going to list just some off the top of my head., this is in no way definitive. Isat spoilers ahead - get all the way through the game and the secret before proceeding.

Big recommendation list below:

Additionally, mind the tags for each fic - I wont be specifying the content warnings here.

(don't just read the complete ones!!! Incomplete fic is just as delightful I promise :3)

Complete: Bloom - Level99Eevee Most people know it, it sits at the top of the tag! It's my every wish fulfilled for post-cannon moments.

Memories of defeat - dirtbagtrashcat Stuff in and immediately after the loops, fantastic extrapolations!!!! Very much Loop <33 I find this very grounded and realistic!!!!

Emotion Sickness - dirtbagtrashcat Post cannon fun/trauma with siffrin and the gang.

Memories of Touch - dirtbagtrashcat look i just really like their work sjkdjkfjkasdf its all good go through their profile. This is Isa thoughts.

And if I were not myself, would this be easier? - rabbit_soup Post-game! I love how they flesh out the world.

The Understudy - kittyorange Suuuuch a loop fic I love it to bits. Post cannon loop and the gang stuff.

Star-Speckled Skin - Lora_Blackmane Funn angsty moment, title is very descriptive. Lives in my head rent free.

Clinging to dying embers - Coffeewolf67 Odile's perspective of sif using the dagger. appropriate content warnings apply :)

between the end and a new start - glowingjellyfishtreelights SICKFICCC I had a very funny experience with this one where due to memory mishaps I got to read it for the first time twice! Absolute banger.

What's in a name? - Raaj Explores siffrins love of plays. I have to regularly reread this for my brain to function.

Starstruck - Dusk_Illusionist Isa yearns. The fic. It rocks.

Saturn Devouring His Son (Time Choking on Stone Choking on Blood)- BasilPaste Post cannon moment... I like it...

(Why) you can't let them know by Mayasynth sasasap fic!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!!! i like it. i hold it. i like it. UGH theres more but I have already listed so many.. my other favorites... im so sorry.,.. i love you guys too... Incomplete:

How To Rest by rabbit_soup Sequel to "And if i were not myself, would this be easier?" Loop is here and I love violence.

TRY IT AGAIN, CHEATER! by discatded "[Loop returns to their own universe after everything. It's hard.]" - from the summary. Love it love it. I will never get enough of this premise.

To Extend our Reach to the Stars Above by Cinnamin_Is_a_Star "Sif if he was team rocket" and is so fun. Very excited to see this one pan out!

until we move on. by Anonymous (also known as lozy) LOOP MY BELOVED..! loop returns to their universe and promptly looses it like the universe intended. Cant get enough of it.

Natural Satellite by dirtbagtrashcat If a single fic makes me the Most insane its natural satellite if I'm honest.... like bro... It just gets right to me...

Sunder by Miranda_tries_their_best Post-cannon Loop fic!! They travel on their own for a bit (but not forever), and I love it dearly.

Face the Light by Kaimiiru Post-game, I hold it close to my heart.... Ah... It's so dear to me.

These next two are sloop so if that's not your thing you have been warned :]

raconte-moi qu’on puisse crier tout bas by bibliomaniac I'm holding this high above my head so everyone can see it the characterization is off the charts.

To Cut You Open With a Knife and Find Your Sacred Heart by Hexea_Art Changeling Loop fic!! What a fun concept. I am excited to see where it goes. yay! AGAIN... THERE ARE SO MANY I LOVE SO MUCH but im forcing myself not to look through the tag else I'd add everything. Honestly, I do recommend just launching right on into the ao3 tag for ISAT even if you aren't super familiar with ao3. Just be sure to filter out anything you don't want to see!

Consider this a good starting point ^^

#asks #del-phi-nium #kaze speaks #isat spoilers #oh boy 12am /joke #uh i hope this is helpful. lemme know if any of these links are broken i didnt check any of them.#i think all these are viewable w/o an account also #if anyone finds this useful do let me know i'd love to hear #isat

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llumimoon · 1 year ago

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I RAN OHT OF TAGS TO FIT MY WHOLE RAMBLE. UHM. maybeee i should make an essay post abt these two one day

ouggh. add another "npc relationship that would be really cool to see but that we probably wont get" to the list !!! anyways im thinking abt Hero Oak and Grant Wilson and fucking weeping

#self reblog #cal rambles #HELPPPPPPP #well. the continuing thing was #if she lets herself think abt violence i think it goes hand in hand with the guilt #that if its not her than everyone is fucked. that if its not her its normal.#her baby brother is put directly in the line of fire bc she couldnt handle it #so if she masks everything under a layer of apathy and she doesnt think too hard about it #she wont feel guilty. she can hand off the responsibility #and not feel guilty about being relieved that the weight is off her shoulders #cries screams throws up explodes explodes explodes #the PARALLELS IM ILL #i do wonder if Hero's treatment played into Grant seemingly being the first to disconnect from the other kiddads family wise #bc. ive been thinking abt the parallels #i wonder if Grant felt a little ill thinking abt his past 13 year old self and little Hero with blood on her hands #sorry. JSBWBWWJJEJFGJ wxplodes i jusy. them. im gonna go weep #i cant stop thinking abt 13 year old grant before the Incident insisting that theres no death that they dont kill anyone #crawls into a hole and sobs #BTW I AM STILL AN ADVID SPARROW APOLOGIST SORRY.#i think hes changed and hes the one who eventually intervened with Heros training and made it stop #DOES MEAN I CANT ANGST ABT IT HAPPENING ANYWAYS #doesnt mean * oops #i make too many typos for this shit tumblr let me edit my tags pleasepleade pelade ur nothing.

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toytulini · 7 months ago

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lightly defending Toshiro while also fully understanding Laois frustrations. as a bitch who let teachers call me the wrong name all through high school cos it was kinda funny

#toy txt post #i knew it wasnt their fault they just dealt with So Many Names and i couldve corrected them and i used to #but the thing is that it just kept happening w so many teachers??#so i was like fine whatever idc that much. but also they did usually remember my name if there was someone in the class who actually #had the wrong name they usually called me. i think bc it would stick in their heads more since they had to differentiate so instead of #looking at me and going [letter] name......[common name starting with that letter that isnt mine]#theyd look at me and go [letter name].....but theres 2 names in that class with that letter and theyre different and this one is Not the #easy more common one. [gets name correct]#what really would throw me is when theyd try a DIFFERENT but i think still more common name with the same letter and then lile #like*. sorry bud im not used to that one i cant help u there #my favorite was the print production teacher who USUALLY GOT MY NAME RIGHT (i think smaller class size helped?)#who called me the more common one that im not used to and then stared at me in puzzlement and he was like #why did i do that. thats not your name. and i was just like lmao idk bro #anyway. this has been a really annoying way to discuss this event without actually revealing my name but #its not quite a deadname now but like. as far as yall are concerned im Toy. if you know me irl you almost certainly know it tho #and if youve been following me long enough you could probably know it cos i was less careful about it when i was younger #if youre like burningly curious and we're mutuals u can dm me ig and ill tell u just dont call me that lol #oh if u have me on fb u know it for sure unless u forgot and you see me (rare and unlikely on fb) nd youre like who the fuck is that #it probably wouldnt be hard to guess even. but whatever. if u feel the need to guess (why) just do me a favor and do it via #dm or ask or smth lmao #ALSO: uhhh i try not to tag this anymore cos it feels like its not coming across the way its intended and it has a weird vibe to tag these #days but i feel like this post could use the 'Im a white person this experience im referencing is with a layer of white privilege #and i understand that for many ppl of color or ppl with non english names this happens and its less funny #altho i think due to the vastness of human experience there are probably ppl with non english names who have this happen but it doesnt #affect them strongly and they just laugh it off and part of me wonders how much of that has to do with how much you LIKE and Identify with #your given name WHICH i ALSO recognize can be a more nuanced experience for someone with a non english name thats like #got cultural significance ETC. okay THERE. the annoying disclaimer that pisses everyone off bc everyone HATES disclaimers now.#just imagine. i could be writing these disclaimers for a FICTIONAL ROMANCE BOOK IVE WRITTEN. and wouldnt #that piss you off more? new disclaimer to piss you off more: i understand this is my personal blog and im not obligated to provide a #fuck i was gonna do another disclaimer as a bit but i ran out of tags! fuck okay bye. youll have to make up the joke disclaimer

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ttkinnie · 3 months ago

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How do you even settle into the average married life when you've been playing god with ur friends' destinies for the past twenty or so years

> no but really especially in the beginning of the last tl he's a 26/ 27 year old who spent the last year in extreme situations while the past decade has been normal adult life and then you're faced with little kids (6 or 7 or 8 not much higher) who are all fucked up and you're playing parent/therapist/future (as in past present) manipulator? Like. This is a bit of grooming, even with the best intentions. Because they think you're the same age as them and you're never going to tell them any different (or is he).

The Mikey joke killed me he'd he the type to do that 😭 like at what point do you stop? What if the kids are still not alright, what if taiju still hits his brother and sister after having one (1) talk, what if izana still lives into shitty conditions, what if kazutora still has a shitty dad and what if people still decide to ruin their lives and the life of other because that's what people do (especially teenagers)?

@gratuiciel tbh I wonder how they even met. Probably Kisaki's trying to find strong people for Toman and he hears of the reaper of Kabukicho. But how do Takemichi and Mikey react to that?

The two of them are even worse than Kisaki alone in bringing up unwanted memories. I feel like final timeline Kisaki would kind of be perceived as a timebomb by the maitake duo, they unconsciously treat his actions with the veneer of the actions he hasn't done. Plus his personality is still the same, he can still do the worst things to reach his goals, and they are probably so uncomfortable with that. Trying to rein him in, quell any desire for power. But is it power? Because Kisaki didn't do all of that for the sake of power, he did it for love. Does Takemichi think about that, when Kisaki (maybe) moves on from Hinata? That he could find someone else to get obsessed with, and do the same things he's done in every previous timeline. So unintentionally (or not if you want to go dark <- yum) they destroy his attempts at finding love/acceptance because he could fall in that same pit.

Enter Hanma, who's the incarnation of not giving a fuck about proper boundaries and rules, breaking every principle maitake tried to instil in Kisaki. And with Kisaki so deprived of affection, still so lonely and with no goal to distract himself, he would be so enclined to get interested in Hanma. Because I feel like Hanma would still find that little loser interesting, with his mask of arrogance and his empty position in Toman, how his group of "friends" don't even appreciate him but won't let him reach out to anyone else.

And Takemichi wouldn't like that influence on Kisaki, would try to get them as far apart as possible. Maybe that's why Hanma is a photographer who spends most of his time outside Japan as an adult? Idk there's something in there.

#i see theres a bad shinichiro theory tag on ao3 apparently 🤔 inch resting #<- i didnt even know that lolz it was all bananas45 and i feel like im their number one fan with how much ive pushed it on u #but its really that the hcs for the last tl and their general characterization feel soooo in canon #literally half of my ideas came from there 😶‍🌫️ thats why i talk about it a lot #pls post about the sano bros their entire deal is so fascinating #<- i will! probably not today because it is now 4h30 and i am dead 💀#they're just some guys but also they're legends to so many ppl around them #positive dehumanization/idolization + the pressure to live up to that huehuehue #<- fr! i have to reread the izana backstory+ black dragons origins for shin because i cant see him as anything than what he is in banans fic #and i feel like mikey with his whole “i like strong people” and the whole trauma where he loses everyone #could definitely make him like that- wanting to be surrounded and close to people but at the same time sabotaging his relationships to #protect himself + needs to live up to his brothers legacy and try to recreat the feeling he had back when shin was still alive #self centered because his parents abandonned him through death and he put a shell around him and arrogant because of his talent #plus his friends all come to meet him and stay with him because hes strong and can beat them/or they r friends of friends #with the exception of sanzu and baji maybe? i dont really remember baji's relationship with him i need to reread #okay i stop yapping and go to sleep now

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