#ALSO: uhhh i try not to tag this anymore cos it feels like its not coming across the way its intended and it has a weird vibe to tag these

[toytulini]

lightly defending Toshiro while also fully understanding Laois frustrations. as a bitch who let teachers call me the wrong name all through high school cos it was kinda funny

[jdeanmorgan]

20 Questions for Fic Writers

I was tagged by the lovely @ex0rin mwah

How many works do you have on ao3?

currently, 32.

What's your total ao3 word count?

currently, it's 232,045

What fandoms do you write for?

the walking dead, 911 and supernatural

Top five fics by kudos:

soaking in his sin (buddie, 911) blood on my shirt (heart in my hands) (buddie, 911) Get Down, Make Love (buckbobby, 911) blow for a job (buckbobby, 911) I let you fuck away my pain (make it come back) (cegan, twd)

Do you respond to comments?

rarely. I always appreciate comments, like, i always get so giddy and happy when I receive one, but there's only so many ways I can say thank you, you know? and I don't wanna clog up the comments with just thank yous. but i try to respond if i feel like i have a good response to offer.

What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

i'm actually not sure... this was on another account but maybe it's don't say you love me but i never really use this account anymore so if we're talking my current account it might be nothing's gonna bring us down (for new years) since its like sad but open/hopeful ending.

What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

uhhh. i'm not sure actually. maybe behind closed doors ??? like i genuinely have no idea

Do you get hate on fics?

rarely, yeah.

Do you write smut?

yes.

Craziest crossover:

good enough to make you grow (where negan from the twd has a three some with eddie and buck from 911.)

Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that i know of

Have you ever had a fic translated?

i think yes? but normally i say no.

Have you ever co-written a fic before?

yes but it's not published.

All time favorite ship?

it changes with each brainrot honestly. right now? cegan. hands down. but there's also been other ships that i've loved.

What's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

another one on my previous account called sour times. i just got some comments on it that i hated and i lost interest in it. i still had fun writing it but yeah it just does not feel like i want to finish it at all and i've honestly been debating deleting it but then i don't bc what if some readers like it enough to reread? so i just leave it like that.

What are your writing strengths?

i'm not too sure. i think maybe dialogue??? not sure though, i try not to think too hard about that.

What are your writing weaknesses?

its hard for me to figure out pacing. and smut is so hard for me it always takes me ages to write one smut scene compared to other stuff.

Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

not a fan, but also i don't really care.

First fandom you wrote in?

it was glee. those fics are out there. but i pretend they're not bc i was 15 and they're cringy as fuck.

Favorite fic you've written?

right now it's blood on my shirt (heart in my hands) (911, buddie)

i shall tag: @duchessonfire @bigassbowlingballhead @eusuntgratie @tawaifeddiediaz @usereddie @wh0re-behavi0r & whoever else wants to do it.

[cadriona]

20 questions for fic writers

tagged by @hua-fei-hua! Thanks for the tag lol

1. how many works do you have on ao3?

46 works! ...yall only see 39 because 7 are anon'd aoeighaoieh

2. what's your total ao3 word count?

537,345 so far!

3. what fandoms do you write for?

Predominantly genshin, although I've also poked at trigun, and naruto lol.

4. what are your top 5 fics by kudos?

*squints*

5 times Ningguang saved Beidou and the 1 time Beidou returned the favour, (Genshin), 1447

A Mora for a Myth in a Land filled with Legends (Genshin), 1146 kudos

[anon'd fic] (Naruto), ~630 kudos

Beidou walks off the gangplank (by accident, really) (Genshin), 454 kudos

Yelan: Spymaster, Gambler, Self-proclaimed matchmaker (Genshin), 384 kudos

5. do you respond to comments? why or why not?

I TRY TO!! haven't been able to recently because brain too tired and it's gotten so long that it uh. might be awkward if i randomly responded now, but i try to!! I love talking with readers and seeing what they think of the fic, and also sometimes it gives me an excuse to infodump worldbuilding or character building lmaooo

6. what is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

Err, either one of two of the four MCD fics i have?? Two of them have ok, sorta hopeful endings, except two are just me waving a knife and cackling in the background aoieghoaiehga

7. what is the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

I'm tempted to say *most* have happy endings?? some take a bit to get there, but most should be happy! if they were to duke it out for happiest tho? i have no idea lol

8. do you get hate on fics?

Not really no! Or at least, none that stuck around in my head lmao

9. do you write smut? if so, what kind?

*points at a few of the anon'd fics* what kind? uhhh, depends??

10. do you write crossovers? what's the craziest one you've written?

Yea! I think I only have two up and one's anon'd because it was from way long ago, only had one chap and i don't want to look at it anymore, so i guess the default prize goes to the genshin x atla one where i yeet four liyue ladies into the elemental nations via reincarnation after teyvat gets murked by celestia and watch things go boom ehehehe... gods i need to actually finish writing that one orz

11. have you ever had a fic stolen?

i hope not????

12. have you ever had a fic translated?

Yeah! I think there were two translated into Russian?

13. have you ever co-written a fic before?

Lol nope, might be interested tho!

14. what's your all-time favorite ship?

BEIGUANG (they've had me by the throat for like, 3 years at this point)

15. what's a wip you want to finish but doubt you ever will?

My first fic, aka the anon'd naruto one because i also want to rewrite it and orz (yes it was an si-oc and it recently did a little resurgence in my brain so. Ha. feel free to ask about it because i have so may Thoughts but its uh, its been a while and my writing style has completely changed since)

16. what are your writing strengths?

I'd like to say worldbuilding and fun metaphors/analogies! or maybe action scenes? and if i know the character well enough (*cough*beidou*cough*) then maybe characterization

17. what are your writing weaknesses?

I NEED TO FIGURE OUT HOW TO STOP RAMBLING. brain starts yapping and it doesn't stop, and then i don't know what details to cut because everything starts looking important ahhhhhh (so probably pacing??)

18. thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic?

Depends! full dialogue? probably nah, since it sometimes breaks the flow, but a word here or there because it works better and people presumably know what it means? then yea! Might need to do some translations/linking shenanigans in the AN if i ever end up doing that tho

19. first fandom you wrote for?

Naruto LMFAOOO

20. favorite fic you've written?

I'd like to say mora for a myth, because its been a while since ive had that type of productivity and motivation? but honestly im not that sure lol

tagging: @yuniemaki, @lisascumslut78, @fishareglorious, @mireillexy, @bardigrade if yall feel like it, and anyone else that wants to give it a go :D

[razerathane]

20 questions for fic writers

Oh shit tagged by the holy @orangeflavoryawp <3

1. How many works do you have on Ao3/fanfiction.net? All of my AO3 stuff is crossposted from FFN, so based on FFN: 121 total posted

2. What's your total Ao3/fanfiction.net word count? On AO3: 83,212 Actual Total From FFN: 1,159,440

3. What fandoms do you write for? I've dabbled in a lot. But the ones that I've written MORE than 5 fics for are: Tekken, Soul Calibur, Final Fantasy VII, Kingdom Hearts. The most recent fandom I wrote for is Mass Effect.

4. What are your top 5 fics by kudos? For AO3 (who has kudos):

Anchor (Mass Effect)

Molten (Mass Effect)

Breath (Mass Effect)

Postcards From Palaven (Mass Effect)

Exodus (Legend of Zelda: Breath of the Wild)

For FFN, instead by review count total (as there's no kudos and all my works are here):

With Me (Tekken)

Take Me Back (Tekken)

Just Like Me (Tekken)

Better Than Me (Tekken)

No Tomorrow (Tekken)

5. Do you respond to comments? Why or why not? Yes, I always try to engage with those that chose to engage with my fics.

6. What is the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending? uhhh prrrobably Anchor (Mass Effect), but like, so much of my writing is angst LOL.

7. What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending uh I'm not really a big happy ending writer, so probably All That Matters (Tekken).

8. Do you get hate on fics? Excluding the stalking hater of 11-12 years, no, not really.

9. Do you write smut? If so, what kind? Yes I do / have, no y'all will never see it, no y'all will never know what kind. Nice try, QUIZ.

10. Do you write crossovers? What's the craziest one you've written? I don't write crossovers, not my thing tbh.

11. Have you ever had a fic stolen? Yep, around early 2012.

12. Have you ever had a fic translated? Yes, there was a Russian fan who asked to translate some of my HwoaJulia fics to Russian.

13. Have you ever co-written a fic before? Yes, once, with Danko Kaji.

14. What's your all time favorite ship? Honestly I don't really have a favourite non-OC ship anymore.

15. What's a WIP you want to finish but doubt you ever will? tbh? Probably No Tomorrow. There's 5 chapters left, I haven't touched it in about 10 years, but also the fandom is dead, and what is energy.

16. What are your writing strengths? I don't know tbh. Others years ago said fight scenes. I think dialogue.

17. What are your writing weaknesses? I don't really know. I think pacing, I feel like I get too stuck in a scene.

18. Thoughts on writing dialogue in another language in fic? I mean if its just for fanfic which is where a lotta people are learning about writing etc? Sure. In a real published thing? Handle with much much more care.

19. First fandom you wrote for? And published? Tekken. For myself? Soul Calibur and Star Fox.

20. Favorite fic you've written? This was really hard. I couldn't chose an individual favourite but my favourite five were:

Libra (Final Fantasy 7)

Anchor (Mass Effect)

Firestorm (Legend of Korra)

Ashes (Soul Calibur)

Oubliette (Dragon Age)

Tagging those that might be interested (no pressure): @steves-strapcollection @suncesus @dankokaji @briewoodfiction @vinjaryou @lemony-snickers @inchofsalt @bluedangernoodle

[sleepy-lil-kit-kat]

20 questions for fic writers!

tagged by @agerefandom (hi! hello!!! thank you for the tag!!!!)

1) How many stories do you have on AO3?

33, on my agere account!

2) What's your total AO3 word count?

59,316. waow

3) What fandoms do you write for?

i have a list in my pinned post! :) though I wouldn't necessarily feel comfortable enough with all of them to post fic to ao3

4) Top 5 fics by kudos?

these little words–they're changing us (Five Nights at Freddy's (Movie 2023), Five Nights at Freddy's) (1,139 words) calm, fledgling. (Star Wars Prequel Trilogy) (2,974 words) can i borrow you for a moment? (Five Nights at Freddy's) (946 words) scared of the dark (i need a nightlight) (Star Wars Prequel Trilogy) (1,019 words) to be cared for (Star Wars Prequel Trilogy) (1,540 words)

5) Do you respond to comments?

every single one, haha

6) What's the fic you wrote with the angstiest ending?

mouthfuls of blood. incidentally, its one of my favourites (its pretty dark!) the ending is ambiguous, but, well... it might be agere, but its still abigail hobbs, implied to be going the canon way

7) What's the fic you wrote with the happiest ending?

similar to prev, most of my fics are pretty happy, but if we're going by tone shift throughout the fic then I think that has to be my most recent fic, a forecast of sun, after the rain. jon gets a hug!!!

8) Do you get hate on fics?

nope! possibly cause most of my fics are locked to only people with ao3 accounts, and the rest don't allow guest comments

9) Do you write smut?

not here! (or rly at all)

10) Craziest crossover?

um. i don't think I want to specify, since it was on a ff.net that I don't have the login details for anymore and my 12 year old self kind of doxxed himself. so. second craziest would have to be i think. uhh. hm. a persona/tma thing i have in my Google docs that isn't agere

11) Have you ever had a fic stolen?

not that I know of!

12) Have you ever had a fic translated?

nope

13) Have you co-written a fic before?

kinda yeah. but it's probably never getting posted cause the pov character won't ignore something that he also doesn't want to acknowledge and it's making it difficult to write

14) All-time favourite ship?

might have to be jonelias. but also my secret weird bizarre ship eye4i (no I'm not explaining what that is)

15) What's a wip you want to finish, but doubt you ever will?

oh! my hannibal littles are known au that's Not fluffy at all. it's evil and horrible and the regressors aren't all soft babies. sometimes the babies... Kill People.

16) What are your writing strengths?

i think im pretty solid at getting the like, narrative voice, to not feel too adult? but it's hard to tell, given the autism. uhhh. hmm. im not sure, I'm not great at assessing my own strengths

17) What are your writing weaknesses?

i think I could be better with descriptions, and a lot of my stuff doesn't feel in-character to me

18) Thoughts on dialogue in another language?

unless the point is that the pov character doesn't understand what's being said, don't like it

19) First fandom you wrote in?

very technically.... mcyt, i was writing about stampy cat. first fandom I posted in was splatoon, though

20) Favourite fic you've written?

ohh this one is hard! I have different favourites for different reasons. i like some of my more self-indulgent stuff on a personal level, but on like a technical level.... oof. it is I think not an agere fic, on account of the friends it made me, but unfortunately its too weird for me to want to link it here

oh I. I don't know who to tag. anyone feel comfortable trying to tag on this isn't an age regressor. if you want to do this consider yourself tagged!!!!

[theunconcernedembalmer]

Toko! I was thinking of creating an ask the character blog for IDV or Genshin Impact and wanted a few tips on how to start off. Anything you can share?

ey yo my dude!! thank you so much for this question, now im lowkey tempted (again) to make a genshin ask blog sjadhlkshgkahshglsaj anyway my 1.5 cents is under the cut, yall know how much i talk here HAHAHAHAH

uhhhhhh so i guess we start with picking a character u really Vibe with tm? I KNOW THIS SOUNDS LIKE COMMON SENSE BUT LIKE ive been considering making a genshin ask blog for a while now but i never really got to it cos i couldnt really decide on a character (plus the fact that their outfits are. so intricate. is also a hmm since i try to follow details to a t) (at first i wanted to do zhongli, but i feel like to be able to muse him well u need to know the lore super super well, which i dont n im too lazy to research on that aha. n u know how much i respect characterizations, especially for such a complex character like him. i also considered xiangling for a period of time mostly for guoba but also like i have 2+1 blogs here n having one more might not be a very good idea aha) (as for aesop he was my Hyperfixation Character tm also cos i looked at his kit n went Yep i could work with this. probably)

so assuming ur not a dumbass like me n u kinda know who u wanna pick, id actually say to snoop around here for other ask blogs n kinda get a feel of the... scene? is that the word? or like u know, other blogs that u can potentially vibe with. ive run a couple of ask blogs before this current one (both that have died for different reasons) n from my experience interacting with other blogs (if theyre okay with it, i think most should be) is pretty fun. it also kinda helps get ur blog around to other ppl on other blogs so they can go Oh whats this cool shit n check u out, n its also a reason why we kinda reblog promo posts for other blogs (also cos we’re always excited when someone new comes on, its really the more the merrier. we see all :eyes:). interacting with other blogs is also an option when ur inbox is looking real roomy too

another reason why i havent exactly done a genshin blog is that idk i cant actually seem to find genshin ask blogs around (i have seen rp blogs, or those that answer asks with mostly text instead of art, but thats. not my thing since i hate my own writing aha) (i did find one aether blog some time ago, but for some reason i hardly see them around anymore??? idk man i might be wrong). its not like im trying super hard to find them ask blogs, so im sure they exist out there (hopefully?? im not sure but im being optimistic). i mean theres nothing wrong with just starting an ask blog without others around, but for me i do find a difference when i interact with other ask blogs n when i dont, n i prefer when theres others to have fun with (unfortunately i couldnt find any ask blogs to interact with in my previous fandom. i tried, but the blogs i approached seemed to go inactive shortly afterwards...) plus u get to meet friends that way too :D (i made a lot of friends via idv askblogs n its really been a joy vibing with others)

as for the idv scene. gestures around me. unfortunately there are a lot of ask blogs that arent that active anymore, but theres still some of us who are alive n kicking empty inboxes, n im sure everyone would love to see a new face around. winks at u. also there seems to be a lot more blogs popping up lately, which is really heartening to see.

then u kinda just. make ur blog? n a starting introduction post so ppl can reblog it n spread the word XD n yay u have a blog i guess??? XD

i gotta say tho. dont expect ur blog to take off immediately (especially for smaller fandoms like idv, tvbh i didnt think my blog would even get half this far when i started cos of how non existent idv tumblr seemed to be) n ur inbox will probably be looking pretty empty a lot of the time (or at least filled with some that u havent quite thought of how to reply to yet aha) (but also like empty inboxes happen pretty often, im sure most of us here have experienced this problem)

in the case of the first ask blog i ever started, it never really took off at all. ngl it was kind of demoralizing n depressing but to be fair i had picked one of the more obscure characters in the series, so obscure that many ppl in the fandom would have never heard of this character before. if u wanted to know, i took a character that only appeared in the 2nd musical of the series, who also made a very brief cameo in the manga to acknowledge his existence within that universe. thats how obscure my character was, but i went with him purely because he was my favourite character. i will say though i did enjoy it while it lasted n i learnt a lot from the experience, n i think thats whats important really.

i guess this kinda leads on (not really but let me digress) to the whole uhhhh thing where if u choose a more popular character, u get more attention. which is fine i guess? if u really vibe with the character, i mean theyre popular for a reason. n choosing a more popular fandom (like genshin) would objectively also get u more viewers n numbers. but like honestly i believe that ask blogs are meant for u to have fun with, n like trying to get popular gets tiring pretty fast (this shouldnt be like a main goal, but u know sometimes u subconsciously also want that gucci follower count n bomb ass notes or something. i used to be guilty of this until i realized it isnt worth it) especially if ur not enjoying yourself in the process. (case in point: my previous fandom was considerably larger n my blog got about 700 followers within a year or so, but it got very tiring n stressful to maintain after my interest in it died, n no one was really interacting with the blog even though i tried which kinda made it even more depressing despite the so called success n popularity of the blog)

anyway on a less serious note, theres a lot of fun stuff u can do with the ask blog, like some ask blogs have really fancy tags that i really like n try to do but also like not really HAHAHAHA. i kinda just channel what i want to see in an ask blog into my own ask blogs (good art is one, i try very hard for it to be good :,DD another is characterization, n others is just extra miscellaneous arts n stuffs like au ideas or memes. these are also somethings u could work on during ask box downtimes perhaps)

uhhh another side thing is like a posting schedule i guess? like ppl would be more likely to interact (i think) if ur blog is relatively active, n this is usually determined by the last post u made (i think XD). but like generally for blog maintenence id say try to kinda find a frequency that ur comfortable with?? cos i know my once a day posting is kinda insane if i wasnt so hyperfixated on all of this n fight the urge to dump all ur replies when u finish them XD (though ive seen some blogs do that n they do it pretty frequently so its pretty nice to know once u see their post u can spend some time going through the latest batch of posts XD) the queue function is pretty useful here even though i truthfully have never really used it, i kinda just post from my drafts really but it also helps to space out ur content to seem somewhat active especially when u dont have the time to be working on replies sometimes. i hope u know what im trying to say here aha

ANYWAY that was like my 1.5 cents cos i dont even think its worth 2 cents HAHAHAHAH these are just my thoughts from running all my blogs up till now, some that are still running n the others that have just died a natural death. i wouldnt actually delete them (theyre still around actually XD) cos theyre kinda like archives n i can look back at what i did last time. cos ngl i made some high quality stuff back then, n i dont even know how i managed to do that aldhflhdsgk. also ppl do look at archive blogs every now n then for the content thats there yknow

BUT YES anyway if u do decide to join the idv ask blogs hmu, ill be sure to give u a lil shoutout here. winks

[enduringsea]

( rules: you can usually tell a lot about a person by the kind of music they listen to! put your music on shuffle and list the first 10 songs, then tag 10 people! no skipping! ) / tagged by @yellowcrumpet​ ╭( ･ㅂ･)و )))

Thanks for the tag! I LOVE these things-- I don’t rlly have a playlist either though, just a mess of music files on a device I haven’t updated so I’ll be checking my YouTube history too lol. There’s a uhhh.... pattern to be found, mainly relating to Code Vein or other OCs.... which isn’t surprising ._. ;; I made it a separate post bc I knew this was going to get long and rambly with lyric snippets and crying about fictional characters, sorry :D

1. Repeat Until Death - Novo Amor don’t go / you’re half of me now / but i’m hardly stood proud / i said it, almost oh i’ve been low / but damn it i bet it don’t show / it was heaven a moment ago oh i can’t seem to let myself leave you / but i can’t breathe anymore This one gives me Loubeth vibes ok, partially bad end route ;-; While Elizabeth is a very strong person, her friends are the most prominent reason she tries to do anything at all & isn’t living day-to-day in a monotonous grind to survive without a solid purpose other than ‘help random ppl bc it’s the right thing to do’. If she loses them, it’d ruin her & hammers into her head how everything she’s ever done has been a failure. She suffered a major betrayal by her boss before the Collapse, she was unable to fully participate in proj. queen despite her incredible test results, she failed to defeat Cruz and take her blood during Operation Queenslayer, and if she fails to protect the people she’s finally found meaning with? She’d break down completely & destroy herself to save them. She’s always had some level of abandonment issues, and without her family around it’s so much worse, even if it isn’t the most obvious because she’s generally seen as very well put together-- I really can’t express how much it would hurt her to lose Louis, Yakumo, and the others. She’s just not one to show just how bad it can truly get for her mentally and emotionally-- she’s resilient as hell, she’s been through hell repeatedly and survived it all, so it’s easy for others to assume she’s fine all things considered. It makes her feel weak and ashamed of herself if she shows any level of vulnerability, so she doesn’t; she swallows it down and is afraid of disappointing those who look up to her as a fighter and friend-- of course, no one at Home Base would blame her for being vulnerable, they all have their moments, Bethy just sets herself to such a high standard it’s difficult for her to talk about her own suffering in spite of how well-versed she is in getting her thoughts and feelings across otherwise. Louis is the one most keen to how deeply she’s hurting, but he doesn’t understand just how deeply until she finally does fall apart. The final swell of the song and its desperate lyrics really relays the pain they both feel-- Louis too would not fare well if something happened to Elizabeth, because he blames himself she was even involved in Operation Queenslayer for a long time, I honestly did so bad in explaining coherently, this song just has so much emotion and hurt behind it adklfjdfdff </3

2. Looking Out For You - Joy Again this is a love song for a girl who will never know it’s about her she's beaming that smile / all the while i’m all tripped up on my own throat i guess there is no hope This song reminds me of Elizabeth & my friend’s character Takashi Fujioka, who gets-- vERY...FRIENDZONED, for lack of a better word, by Elizabeth in his story, it’s really summed up best as tragic (;﹏;) Before the Collapse they were hitting it off, then the Collapse happened, they were separated, he lost his sisters, Mido happened, he was experimented on + became a revenant, etc, etc; years have passed since then & she’s gotten her life together as much as one can in a world like Vein, but for Takashi it’s like no time has passed at all. Elizabeth is subtly older in appearance, she’s been working w Lou & Co. for a long time; Loubeth blatantly have a connection, & rather than bringing up his feelings + making it awkward bc he values their friendships, he just kinda. chokes on them & does his best to help out the team. It doesn’t help he can’t even be jealous bc Louis is a really solid friend to him too, IT’S JUST A MESS OF A SITUATION & the death of what could have been if things were different.

3. Closer - Teagan And Sara ( no lengthy explanation for this one thank goodness, I’ve just been watching BoJack Horseman again and I really like some of the songs they add in, I like listening to this one on loop when mindlessly coloring something )

4. Brutal - Olivia Rodrigo  all I did was try my best / this the kind of thanks I get? they say these are the golden years / but I wish I could disappear ego crush is so severe / god, it's brutal out here I have it on a playlist for Elizabeth somewhere, not all of it applies to her but it reflects some of her struggles she has both before & after the collapse. She’s-- always kind of been a mess while under immense pressure + has serious self image issues, this song hits that side of her well. She’s been held to humanly impossible standards by both herself and her family bc frankly? She can reach them, she’s NOT exactly human. She was born into her position as a hunter & intends to keep it for as long as she lives (like revenants, her kind is very much ‘either gets killed or lives 5ever), even if some days she really feels how heavy the burden can be. She didn’t have a normal childhood and she’s fine with it for the most part, but it alienates her from most of her peers-- she never got to date anyone, never had a close group of friends, never went to parties that weren’t formals, etc., while she feels a little childish about it, she does envy ‘normal’ and understands the pressure she’s lived under her entire life has caused damage-- she has been exploited for her abilities, there’s just not much she can do about it but to keep going, rlly.

5. Freaks - Surf Curse  don't kill me / just help me run away from everyone  i need a place to stay / where i can cover up my face don't cry / i am just a freak / i am just a freak UhhhHHH this song really makes me think of Oliver Collins :D;; thank TikTok for showing it to me. It makes me think of how scared he was, of both the world and the revenants who captured him. The song’s use of the word ‘parasites’ really makes me think of Revenants and the BOR parasites XD I’m hoping when I poke my video editor again, I can record some Oliver footage to make a short video to this song. Oliver deserves so much better, I wish you could save him, but that’s what AUs are for, hahah.... The second half of the lyrics make me think of the AU I have where he lives and has to grapple with the guilt of surviving and the things he did to other revenants to get by too.

6. All Eyes On Me - Bo Burnham you say the ocean’s rising / like i give a shit you say the whole world’s ending / honey it already did you’re not gonna slow it / heaven knows you tried got it? good / now get inside I haven’t seen the Netflix special yet but I’ve had this song on repeat since my move started. The lyrics hit too hard & resonate with my existential dread, covid exhaustion, and extreme burnout in my 20s, but bc I have Damage I can also relate it to CV ._. ‘you’re not gonna slow it, heaven knows you tried. got it? good now get inside’ makes me think of--;; the bad end route again, and Elizabeth’s desperation to keep her found family together. It’s not like her to completely stop caring about an issue, but in the moment she realizes what’s being taken from her? She doesn’t want to save all of revenant-kind if it means she’s going to wind up alone all over again, her world is effectively over if she’s forced to be alone again. The MC frenzying means the only immediately identifiable hope she had of saving everyone else is gone, so why not just go home? If they’re all doomed, she wants to at least be together for a little while longer, it’s fine if they use her blood to survive & everyone else in the mist is out of luck, it’s soul-crushing bc I’ve never had her in a situation where she’s been this reckless, despondent/hopeless, and thinking irrationally where it’d impact more than herself-- especially when she’s normally goal-oriented, organized, meticulous, so on so forth: she’s not one to act without thinking something through first, but that last breath of light just got sucker-punched out of her. All she wants is home, comfort, and family, and ultimately in the bad end route she does manage to preserve their lives, maintain the mist, and supply blood beads, but her own condition leaves her on the throne-- it’s a mix of the bad, neutral, and true ending rlly ldkfjdf BUT YEAH enough rambling on that :D;; This song’s really good and touches a lot of different thoughts and ideas both in real life and my ocs, kind of embarrassing--;; thank u bo burnham for ruining me with this beautiful song

7. Yellow - Coldplay look at the stars / look how they shine for you / and everything you do your skin / oh yeah, your skin and bones / turn in to something beautiful do you know / for you I'd bleed myself dry Does this song make me think about JackEva? Yes. Yes it does. Star / night sky symbolism? Bam. Sappy lyrics about love and finding the person you’re with absolutely mesmerizing and worth dying for? BAM. If JackEva were capable of using their own blood to save each other, I can see it-- hJNGn they just care about each other so much, Jack cries for her even though they both knew that eventually one of them would succumb to their duty, and if the roles were reversed I can see Eva doing the same, I adore them beyond human language. On my CV RP blog, my Jack’s not shippable bc-- Eva, my friend even have them looking after his nephew (an oc--) at one point. I should seriously drop some headcanons down eventually....

8. Louder Than Thunder - The Devil Wears Prada  are we meant to be empty-handed? / i know i could, i could be better i don't think i deserve it / selflessness, find your way into my heart all stars could be brighter / all hearts could be warmer 

LMFAO throwback to my middle school playlist, I’m old-- I’ve applied this song to a lot of things back in the day, but I really connect it to Loubeth now, especially Louis. Lou & Bethy are both functional idiots who are too hard on themselves & have trouble recognizing their worth beyond what they can do for others. They’re trying to be better-- to make up for what they perceived wrongs they’ve done, but it’s hard, they don’t believe they’re worthy of the love and support the other gives, but they still yearn for that sense of security. After Louis’ memories are returned, he finally understands the guilt he’s felt since he became a revenant and it really skews his self-perception; he blames himself for so many things & Elizabeth, who has always been able to kill when necessary, sets it straight-- “It’s not your fault”, and it takes Louis some time to properly absorb that message. He thinks she’s just trying to comfort him, which she is tbh, but she’s not wrong: “It’s not your fault you couldn’t kill someone. It was never your job to kill anyone.” It’s up to people like her to do those sort of things-- Elizabeth may not have been present when Cruz frenzied, but if she had been? It would have been over before it started, that’s something she has regrets over, even if nothing could have been done since she was already on the field. Actually, she’s actually really quite angry that security failed to monitor Cruz properly and has a few select words for the ones there who could have actually done something before it got out of hand-- civilians and doctors are exempt from her shtlist bc they’re not meant to be killers (so don’t worry Artorias, she’s not ready to bite your head off!), but they had to have some kinda security detail rite o-q??? They’re probably hiding from her wrath-- BUT ANYWAY, she insists she’ll never blame Louis for not being able to do something as serious as killing another person. He was a normal human being who cared about his friend, not a failure, and he couldn’t have been expected to do something that shouldn’t have fallen on his shoulders in the first place. As many times as it takes, she’ll reaffirm that it wasn’t his fault, she’s not angry, he’s always done his best and her opinion of him hasn’t changed. He’s a good person and she loves him through all the hurt, though she doesn’t drop the word ‘love’ for a long time. It just-- takes Louis a while to accept she views him as someone worthy of the love and respect she has for him. It’s kind of ironic she’s so adamant on Louis not blaming himself considering she’s the one privately blaming herself for-- wow there’s too much to unpack, she feels guilty she was even born?? im so broken over these two. I love them and yet they SUFFER... 

9. What I’ve Done - Linkin Park i'll face myself / to cross out what i’ve become erase myself / and let go of what i’ve done today this ends / i'm forgiving what i’ve done

I have Louis Amamiya brainrot and I’m so glad I’m not the only one who thinks that this song fits him super well & it needs to become an AMV dsjfkldsfd. I’m a near life-long Linkin Park fan and this fits with Lou so well thematically. As much as I’ve gone on about Louis’ guilt, he does steel himself to keep going forward in spite of it and make things right, for everyone. Maybe it wasn’t really his fault, but at the end of the day his inability to kill Cruz in that moment left a disaster in its wake that got a countless number of people killed-- the MC included with Karen and Aurora. He doesn’t want to run away from the truth, doesn’t want to make excuses, he wants to take responsibility for it and he’ll work himself to death if it means things will be better-- it’s both admirable he’s got a strong resolve and VERY concerning with how willing he is to die for the cause, please don’t overdo it, Lou, you’ll break mine and Bethy’s hearts ._.;; It won’t always be easy, there are moments the grief gnaws at him, but in the end he does overcome it (and uh. as in the bad ending, we know he can actually do it this time). I know we can’t see everything, but I would have loved deeper character interactions, especially with Louis with an emphasis on grieving + forgiving himself properly-- but this song really is nice with the whole ‘I’m going to face my mistakes head on, forgive myself, and keep moving forward’. It’s what Louis deserves: self forgiveness and a damn break ‧º·(˚ ˃̣̣̥⌓˂̣̣̥ )‧º·˚

10. Call of Silence - Hiroyuki Sawano you will know you're reborn tonight / must be rough but i’ll stay by your side even if my body's bleached to the bones / i don't want go through that ever again so cry no more / oh my beloved ngl idk if those are the correct lyrics, buuuuuuut....... im a weenie and am internally weeping abt loubeth after midnight, what else is new lmfao- i’ll at least try to be brief :D I also used to really like Attack on Titan when I was in high school, I dropped the anime years ago because I was waiting for s2 and never got back to it once it started airing again, I thought I’d finish it once the anime was complete since I eventually caught up with the manga, such a good series BUT ANYWAY-- I think it’s a really pretty song and Loubeth fit with the tender lyrics. IT’S LATE, idk what to say about them other than what I’ve said already dsklfjdslf im sorry I really ramble a LOT and I’ve been so busy lately I haven’t had the chance to >w>;;

[mushroommouth]

Reworked + Expanded S.J. Lore- Now with EXTRA BUMMERS!

(---submitted by @transistor-rhythm-909)

This is going to say an awful lot about my self worth that I’m doing this to my self insert, BUT

(There is a mention of suicide ideation in here, so uhhh do please tag for that cos I can’t seem to on the browser submission page)

The first major change that sets up the angsty stuff: I’ve decided upon is that he doesn’t do part time work at Dom’s workplace anymore- he still met Dom a few years back and before Mira came into the picture (I wanna say probably around the time Son of the Sun took place, which in my mind was when Cody was about 3 or 4). Where he met Dom I’m not sure, but their relationship progresses more or less the same way- as does S.J.’s relationship with Mira when she enters the picture.

The reason for this change is ‘cos I’ve decided to have S.J.’s sole place of employment be Kathy’s Store, as you can probably figure out. Not inherently angsty on its own, but, well…

As we know, S.J. rolled into town with not much travel cash left and desperately needing a job. He didn’t escape a bad home life or tragic circumstances when he left England, he just felt… stagnant there. Didn’t really know what he wanted to do with his life (as whilst he does make music like IRL me, for him it’s decidedly a hobby, not his career choice). Unfortunately, travelling across America when you don’t drive is Pricey, so. He found himself drawn to Kathy’s store, entirely unsure why- and pretty much from the words “'scuse me lass, you hiring?”, Kathy seemed up for helping him out. Not in an overly sentimental way, mind, but she pretty much said “yeah sure, could use the help, you can use the room upstairs 'til you can find yer own place- by the by, here’s the apt. listings in the paper”.

For the first couple of months his life was pretty normal- he wasn’t allowed all the way in the back of the store and some of Kathy’s quirky behaviours stood out to him, but he rolled with it. Then, one day, he got unintentionally caught in the crossfire between Kathy and Em; I need to work out specific details, but the end result of this is that S.J. essentially became aware not only of the supernatural… existing, but also gained a similar sort of “medium awareness” that Kathy and Em possess. He doesn’t necessarily view himself as a character in a story, and the world he’s in one big narrative, at least not literally, but he’s at least on a similar level of omnipotence as Kathy and Em are now. That is all he has, though; the knowledge. He has no godly powers, no magical capability. He’s still dead normal, otherwise.

This is part of what prompts him to stay in Kathy’s employ, even though she straight up tells him he should walk away and not endanger himself further- after all by then, he has his own place, he’s got cash saved up, and he can find work elsewhere. But S.J. says simply “Now I know what you two do, I can’t just pretend life is the way it was. I’m a part of this now, whether I like it or not.”

Kathy looks extremely guilty for a sec, but he continues; “besides, now I know exactly why you look so sad and so tired all the time. After how kind you were to me- a total stranger- when I rolled up outta nowhere, it wouldn’t sit right with me to leave you in the lurch. You look out for the whole town; let me look out for you.”

So S.J.’s path in live is set; he’s a semi omnipotent being who can’t do much with the knowledge he has except be very, very snarky. He can’t ever go back to his original home even if he wanted to without that knowledge. Factor in that he was already depressed and anxiety riddled to begin with, and you can imagine that if S.J. tried living a normal life and just ignoring this new info… he’d crack under the pressure. And the guilt of leaving Kathy behind. And the stronger guilt of leaving Dom and Miranda alone in a town that he now knows does have it’s hostile secrets that could put them in danger.

And that eats up at him, sometimes. He never intended on going back to England when it was an option, even though he sometimes missed it, but now he can’t he finds he misses it more. He visits, sure, but never longer then a week, and usually only at Christmas. The rest of the time, it’s vid calls or nada, and that’s not the same. And he can’t tell his parents, his friends from home, what he knows- they’ll think he’s mad. He knows he’d think someone was mad if they told him what he knows, if he didn’t know it himself.

But, there is a sweet along with that bitter; Dom and Miranda love him very much, and he loves them. They fill his heart in ways that people back home never did, and though that doesn’t fill the void, it makes it easier when he misses home. He and Kathy grow closer as well- again, not romantically (it’s only IRL me that crushes on Kathy I’m afraid), but as professionals, as friends, as mentor and mentee. And he can- and does- help mitigate some of the crisis’ that befall the town, major and minor, with his limited skillset but vast knowledge. And as it turns out, all S.J. has ever really wanted to do is to help people; to love them and look after them; to do what he can to make other people safe and happy, however small and brief that happiness may sometimes be.

And that keeps him going. Even in his darkest days, when he seriously considers ending his life… he finds he can’t. He can’t leave those he loves, near and far, behind. He can’t hurt them like that. To do so would be a betrayal of his most core ideal: to do no harm, and to love like the world is ending.

Part of why the Micoverse fan-verse I’ve constructed for me stories is given the name “Because I Know How Strong Love Is” comes from the fact that S.J. honestly and earnestly believes in the strength that can be drawn from love- not just romantic or sexual, but familial, platonic, love and passion for concepts and interests, the entire spectrum of love as a concept. He knows, deeply and truly, how in many cases that can save anyone. And in spite of the knowledge he knows, that belief has not changed. No matter what he faces, he won’t stop believing. Em herself can actively try everything in her playbook to break him, and sometimes he may- but she cannot take that belief from him. And he rubs that in her face as much as he can, cos to play off those drawings from the other day, she can say 'I’ll destroy everything you love <3’, and he’ll respond with “That won’t stop me loving, lass. Do your worst.” knowing that she will, and not caring; no matter how disadvantageous his position again her or anything else, he’ll go down fighting and swearing- if he goes down.

(which he sometimes does, but there is one small perk that awakening gave him, even if he is not fully aware of it; death doesn’t stick, to him or to anyone. Not completely, no matter how hard Em or The Shape tries. He remembers each death as though it were a dream and is suspicious that it probably did happen, but he can’t count on that; it doesn’t stop him laying down his life willingly if he feels he must).

TL;DR my self insert is technically aware that he’s a character and is also aware of the true nature of Micoverse’s world and the many universes beyond, but that doesn’t stop him living a life of love and peace and as much fun as he can muster, and in the face of evil or cruelty he stands by his convicting that love wins every time- and will actively make it win if given the chance. (he, uh, doesn’t reveal this info to anyone beyond Kathy though. at least in idea situations; given the in-flux nature of aus, side stories, canon and non canon stuff there will be times where they do become aware somehow- like Casual Danger dialogue- but generally he keeps it on the down low unless he has no choice to reveal what he knows)

This was all btw inspired by that “I’ll destroy everything you love <3” drawing, because something about S.J.’s response of “I know, but I’ll be sassy about it” really made me think 'oh, he KNOWS. he’s got access to the knowledge she and Kathy does. that’s a show of his hand’ and I just kinda wanted to run with it. It won’t always be relevant to every single story- and of course I’d never consider S.J. a canon micoverse character (unless you thought of something neat you could do with him anyway)- but it is a part of his character now innit. Our Boy Knows What’s Up.

[mothermouth]

1, 3, 4, and 11? :o

(@bramblewing tagging u in this 2 since u sent me an ask w #1!!!)

ok im gonna try n answer these keep in mind it’s like 3am so these r gonna b rly bad but ur welcome 2 ask me for more info!! but ok im so Problematic n i totally understand if u guys yell @ me for this bdkskskfkgf but my wc ocs r kinda like…… uh……….. ifk how 2 say this in a way that doesn’t make me look bad mffksnng but. uve heard of a hs warriors au. now get ready for…….. The Exact Opposite Of That. basically what im tryin 2 say is that i lowkey have this warriors au for my high school even tho i already graduated dbndndnhkfjsssFJDN THERE I SAID IT IM GOING TO DIE!!!! so most of the main chars in my clan (bearclan) have irl counterparts that they’re Looselt Based On as well as elements of my own mixed in?? which is. as i said. rly problematic? hides my face in my hands BUT i like talkin n thinkin abt it even tho it’s a Mess n it kinda helps me Deal With My Graduation Angst (which i complain abt a lot on my main blog ripendnsnfxnnsns) In A Somewhat Productive Manner so!!! Fjfjsnfkdkdkff. also u bet ur sweet bippy there Will b a college / warriors au too just u Wait,)

1. who is ur most evil character?: IVYPELT….. she’s like. Not Rly Evil Anymore tho but she used 2 be. ok so basically im Bad At Explaining but the protagonist of my wc ocs (thrushheart, a Shameless Self Insert, literally me,) didn’t rly like her bc ivy was rly Nasty 2 her when they were apprentices but then when they became warriors n they both mellowed out a bit thrush realized ivy didn’t mean 2 be rude and was just dealing w some… Stuff internally that was channeled in ivys interactions w thrush w/o ivy meaning 2 rly idk!!!! but they’re good now (even tho they never talked abt it lmao) although it’s still a lil tense between them and thrush is still kinda insecure n wary abt it lmao!

3. who is the leader of ur clan?: MOUSESTAR!!!! she’s this tiny dark brown molly w super curly fur n she’s literally Perfect n everybody loves her n she basically restores bearclans reputation from completely disregarding the warrior code 2 like bein rly reputable n respectable n stuff (this all happened before thrush n co were born tho!) but she’s abt 2 lose her last life rip :-/

4. who is the medicine cat of ur clan?: FJOFOGKDNDF that’s a good question i actually haven’t thought of that yet which is…. Bad™! im still fleshing that char out rip so i’ll get back 2 u on that one!!!

11. who is the most disloyal cat?: hmmmmmmmmm ok well that’s actually a rly rly good question tbh. ok so my wc universe has 12 clans (YEA I KNO ITS A MESS i mostly just focus on bearclan tho) Plus a tribe thingy that’s rly close 2 starclan it’s so hard 2 Explain all of it in these questions which i uhhh Rly shoulda thought of first tbh!!!! but in My universe being halfclan / from a different clan or tribe or whatever is like not as bad as it is in the books but it’s still lowkey kinda bad? jm still working that part out 2 but it’s mostly like minor chars i haven’t figured out the names for et riperoni!!!

(skfjjadjkgdkgg idk if i should b like Ashamed of myself for having this au thing sweats………. idk if that’s bad or problematic i feel like it Is and im gonna get yelled @ but,,,, its fine,,,,,)