#i cannot be arsed anymore

[sweetsodasparkles]

Real time view of ur mediocre artist trying to get her Uk papers sorted.

(fyi i have a pre settled status i'm from the EU and way overdue, i'm applying for a full settled status. Which should be easier but it is not.)(also i have lived here all my adult life like that the f)

[awinglessduck]

Hmmmm, my throat is feeling covid-y.

And I saw someone wearing a face mask on the street the other day. Coincidence?

[3amsnek]

weird (not quite) autumn- one layer practice Mae with some vague leaves stuck on for funsies

[fivewholeminutes]

Guess who FINALLY has started @a-s-levynn's Series Of Small Offerings!!!

PART ONE Thread the Needle

Just look at where we're lying / An invisible space

It turns out i look at the proposed lyrics and suddenly get a Thought™ and follow it, so prepare for the offerings to be weird. In this case i thought of the invisible space being between Vessel and his mask, at the very beginning, before Vessel, before Him.

You can interpret it any way you want, i don't know what that means either, I just like dark drawings with a single source of light. Prepare to a lot of offerings like this too.

And apologies for the quality, I hate this paper, but I like the size of this notebook, do you see my problem

[goblinontour]

nauseous this is literally #him

https://x.com/http_mommy18/status/1832144018530267429?s=46

i opened the link this morning, it’s currently 10:30pm, that’s how long i needed to process it.

UGHHHH FML

[dullahandyke]

[ID: a screenshot of Google Translate, which shows that the Irish word for 'character' is 'carachtar'. End ID]

Why do I even ask like

[the-casbah-way]

when i wake up after a meltdown im like ok im going to be nice to myself today and then i end up being just as mean to myself in my head as i always am except i’ll also maybe let myself go to bed like an hour earlier as a treat

[nikolai-alexi]

why’d you need to call me out this loudly excuse

Me a year ago: Wtf why would anybody write James with someone other than Lily??? They're literally perfect???

Me now: *gay gremlin noises* JEGULUS. STARCHASER. SUNSEEKER. THE BABIES. SO PERFECT. IN LOVE. MUST WRITE NOW.

[lonelywoodlouse]

Urghhhhh I have school on Wednesday and 3 books to annotate which i cant do tomorrow and I have to see the people that I hate and actually deal with them instead of ignoring them all summer and I have to try and find my pe kit Becuase I left it at school and I’m just so done

[toomuchracket]

pool party (d word matty x reader fluff/smut)

day 21 of summer75, and today we have a fun little look at the reality of these fuckers' relationship before anybody knew they were a thing (aka, the one where they're both horny but can't fuck without being suspicious or caught). enjoy <3

you: do u like black or lilac better

matty 😚: in what context?

you roll your eyes, quickly firing back a reply. just pick a colour, babe

matty 😚: lilac

you: thank u <3 i'll meet you all in a min

matty 😚: hurry up please i miss u

you: will do, lover

chucking your phone into your beach bag, you giggle to yourself as you slip into a lilac bikini and sandals. there's a fading hickey the same colour as your swimsuit just under your jaw, you notice as you fix your hair in the mirror, but you don't bother trying to cover it up - hopefully, in wearing your secret boyfriend's favourite colour to a pool party where he cannot touch you at all, you’ll get more of them later.

judging by matty’s expression when you waltz out of the villa to the pool a few minutes later, more marks are a certainty tonight. you spot him as soon as you step outside, lazing insouciantly on a sunlounger, hair dripping wet and body shimmering in the sunshine, and for the briefest of moments you feel truly distraught that you can't just go and drape yourself over him, let his hand find its way to your arse as it does whenever you cuddle up to him. but the feeling passes in favour of exhilarated glee when you notice his jaw drop at the sight of you, a feeling that grows when he slides his sunglasses up to let his eyes trail better over your body. you wink at him, and he smirks, putting his glasses back on when your attention is taken by john asking if you want a drink, to which you eagerly respond in the affirmative.

all in all, you don't actually end up anywhere near matty for about an hour, preoccupied with chatting to your friends, taking pictures with the girls, eating your way through the massive fruit salad adam decided to make “so nobody gets too pissed because they haven't eaten anything”; only after that do you strategically go to sit on the edge of the pool near where your boyfriend and george are splashing each other and laughing like kids, dangling your legs in the warm water while you light up a cigarette and sip at your pornstar martini.

as soon as you exhale your first drag, george seems to materialise in the water front of you, matty trailing behind him (and looking at you like you're a three course meal). “my good friend,” he begins, all gravel drawl and grin. “might i perhaps have one of those cigarettes, please?”

“christ, you're like a bloodhound. here,” you pull the pack and lighter from your bag, setting them down beside you. as george pulls himself out of the pool to sit next to you and light up, you turn to your boyfriend. “you having one?”

matty shakes his head, eyes never leaving your body. “s'not what i want right now, darling.”

“no? alright,” you take another drag, spreading your legs slightly to give him a better look at what he does want while you sip your drink. “want a taste?”

his eyes widen, flicking up to yours in disbelief. “hmm?”

you wave your glass at him, face as saccharine as your cocktail. “of the drink.”

“oh, i- no, thank you,” matty shakes his head. “sorry. blanked for a second there.”

george scoffs. “matty, you fucking perv, she didn't mean it like that,” he turns to you while matty splutters out a response of some kind. “sorry about him, mate. doesn't know how to act around attractive women anymore cos he hasn't gotten any in so long,” he laughs, smirking when he notices the mark on your neck. “but apparently you have! good for you. i trust it was decent?”

you're acutely aware of matty, completely still in the water while he waits for you to answer - you smirk, deciding to fuck with him a little. “well, to be honest, george,” you stub out your cigarette, pausing dramatically. “it was mid.”

matty snorts, squinting at you - disbelieving, but to anyone else it would look like he's just affected by the sun - while george cackles. “was it anyone we know?”

“well, a lady never tells,” you smile, turning to your boyfriend. “matty, if i get in the pool, will you carry me? don't wanna get my hair wet.”

he rolls his eyes. “you're such a princess. get in here.”

giggling at the nickname, you down the rest of your drink. “bye, george. don't smoke all my fags!”

“i won't!”

“you better not! right,” you slide into the water, wrapping your limbs around matty and beaming when he grabs your arse and starts to walk towards the centre of the pool. “hiya.”

“afternoon. you comfy?”

“yeah… wait, just let me,” you wriggle around a little in his grasp, accidentally-on-purpose pushing your boobs into his face for a second before looking at him with a shit-eating grin. “oopsies.”

“you're lucky i can't spank you underwater, you know,” matty smirks, walking the two of you further from the rest of your friends. “for that, and for that fucking mid comment earlier. mid? me making you squirt on my dick was mid?”

you whimper at the memory, clit tingling as you recall the five consecutive orgasms you made it through, before it all got too much to bear and you soaked your boyfriend, much to his delight. “no, daddy, m'sorry,” you tuck your face into his neck, softly kissing it. “was a bad joke. loved it, really,” you move to whisper in his ear. “love you.”

matty's whole demeanour changes - he softens, attitude melting away to reveal the sweetheart you know and love so much. “s'alright, princess, i love you too,” he turns to kiss your head before pulling back to smile at you. “my beautiful girl, in my favourite colour. that was sweet of you to ask, baby.”

“just wanted to turn you on, really.”

he laughs. “well, you've done that, sweetheart,” he pulls your bottom half closer into his. “feel how fucking hard you've got me?”

“yeah,” you breathe. “shit, i wish you could fuck me right now.”

“same,” he rests his head on your shoulder. “d'you think we're being too obvious, by the way? like… you clinging to me?”

“every single person here saw you do a tequila shot from between my tits a month before we were even together, so…” you giggle, hugging him tighter when he laughs too. “i think we're good.”

“s'pose,” matty turns his head towards the rest of your friends, where ross is yelling something about ordering dinner. he sighs. “we'd better go and see them, yeah?”

“might as well,” you reply glumly, sighing dramatically as matty carries you through the water. “guess i'll just have to have sex with you in a pool some other time.”

“oh, believe me, darling, i'll do everything i can to make that happen,” he kisses your head, the final brush of his lips on your skin before you run the risk of being caught. “tonight, though, i do have that massive bath in my room, if you like…”

“absolutely. i'll be there at eight.”

“looking forward to it, princess.”

[murfpersonalblog]

IWTV S2 Ep8 Musings - Loustat (SPOILERS) Pt2: Reunion

You don't know the HALF of what Lestat feels for Louis, to let YOUR grimy arse steal his man, just for LOUIS's happiness. ANYTHING for Louis.

Am I the only one who felt left hanging? We BEEN knew it didn't make sense, but what's your POINT, exactly? If Louis misremembered Lestat whispering, it's just par for the course about the odyssey of recollection. But if Lestat DID do telepathy, is that evidence of...what? That the vampire bond works differently than what's been explained? That he COULD read Lou's mind? AMC, this is AGGRAVATING.

Your goose is COOKED, my guy.

The copium & denial pack Louis was smoking as he laughed was 🤌

That's right, start sweating!

Master manipulation; cuz he certainly would NOT have, as we soon find out. ANYTHING for Louis. (Dang, Imma have to take back some of what I said about Lestat's character development not having started yet.)

I was shocked. I was NOT expecting this plot twist. I was ready to throw Lestat out with the rest of the TRASH, in the DUMP. Well dang. Guess I'll only leave him rotting in a TINY landfill.

I nearly SCREAMED--@nashvillethotchicken and I were talking about Loustat as Bobby and Whitney ages ago! I cannot BELIEVE AMC threw in a New Edition reference in the year of our lord 2024; y'all are diabolical AF, Rolin, STOP IT.

I wonder if AMC used Hurricane Odette cuz the OG script was set in pandemic!2020, so it would make sense that a year later Louis would head back to NOLA during 2021 when Hurricane Odette last hit.

That looks like NOLA's Pontchartrain Hotel--lemme find out he bumped into the Mayfairs when Rowan & them were in town, LOL.

Lestat got more aliases than the KGB; meanwhile Louis just sprinkles his long AF unique AF name all over the place. 🤦 But I guess it's ok, since the tour guide never mentioned him & Claudia by name. (Not Tom Anderson in another finale, LOL.) Louis so offended the tour guide said he ran a voodoo cult. XD

Fall of the House of Lioncourt-Melmouth.

You're gosh darned right! THEE Louis of Troy is in the building!

You love to see it. "A wearisome fledgling; all the millennials are--" not Lestat making PALE PROXIES of rat-catcher extraordinare LDPDL out of millennials. 😭

Lestat, if you don't get your crazy arse outta here with that bloodstained wooden keyboard Imma ROTFLMFAO.

NO JOKE, I effed up my friend's whole set when I started screaming "Siri, Pause," cuz my friend's Siri started freaking out and effed up the volume! XD

HERE WE EFFING GOOOOOOOO

(Best scene all season, fight me on this)

You know this was TEARING Lestat up, cuz of what happened in 1973--I gave Louis to you so you could do BETTER by him than EYE did, and instead it's NICKI ALL OVER AGAIN.

Imma smack him--this is NOT the time to be self-loathing, Lestat!

NOLA is my home--and the SAINT is not a city--I'm gonna cry.

He did. He just forgot, when reality settled in and the allure/nostalgia/glamour wore off. "I tried to make nights awful for you." Not the whole time, Louis. Y'all actually were happy b4--even Claudia said "the easy times" stopped after Florence died; and esp. after Charlie died. Lou can't be blamed for grieving his mom's death, and he definitely can't be blamed for Lestat & Claudia falling out after Charlie. Everything that happened after that--the 7 years of depression--was ALSO Lestat's fault. "I wanted you to suffer, cuz I was suffering;" I'm glad Les just waved that aside and said they BOTH wronged e/o.

He's not suicidal anymore then! He has nights in front of him to look forward to! So Lou can finally "learn to live honestly" with HIMSELF.

And Lestat dove RIGHT ON IN with that! He's been carrying that with him for DECADES, worried about Louis & what happened.

I LOVE that Les' language changes (the way his voice CRACKS and goes so TINY, oml)--he asked Lou in 1973 if he was "ill," and if something had happened TO him; so as to not spook/trigger or blame him--but he can ask more candidly now in a (relatively) "healthier" 2024 if Lou tried to hurt/kill himself; and get a more candid/honest answer. CLOSURE, y'all, I'm gonna cry.

GOOOOOOD. Don't EVER forget your daughter. Y'all need to have a Claudia Memorial; to KEEP remembering her, as she was in all her vampiric splendour, the good times AND the bad times.

I KNOW this hurt Louis to his effing core. The way Jacob cried FIRE!

I'm so glad Lou hugged him--YES YOU WERE, Uncle Les. And you KNOW it; you FELT that bond b/t y'all, even if she never looked at you. The distance b/t y'all was in name only, cuz a little Black girl couldn't have TWO daddies in 1917 and have one of them be white on top of it. I AM YOUR MAKER, sure, but you were her BLOOD FATHER, and she loved you, which is why she hoped you'd help her.

ANOTHER ROUND IN THE STORMY ROMANCE OF YOU TWO. 😭👏

What are these magical off-mic speeches/pep-talks Louis keeps giving people in Season 2?!? THE PEOPLE WANNA KNOW, gosh darnit!

DRATS.

I get why Jam said they thought the Loustat ending was "satisfying." It was nice, even though I'd've preferred to see Lestat in the Dubai penthouse at the end. :\

I LOVE THIS, AMC, thank you! ❤️

[timoswerner]

if i'm honest i still dont really know who that gomes lad is either

who the fuck is 'taylor harwood-bellis'

[3lisorahh]

Sometimes I don't like and I'm upset by the fact that the loa are presented from a psychological point of view, like they seriously claim that nothing changes, but only our view of the world changes to a more positive one It throws me off track because sometimes I see posts that the loa does not change our lives, but simply pushes us to take actions to achieve what we want, although bloggers claim that we don't need to do anything, sometimes I don't know where the truth is anymore..

hey hun! I'm a psychology student, and I feel your pain. for me, I whole heartedly believe in the law of assumption- but I once sadly also believed in the law of attraction. I hate how loattraction truthers say that you need to work and fight for what you want. like who in the hell thought you need to sweat your arse off to get what you want 😭! I believe that the loattraction only got famous in 2020-21 because a lot of psychologists introduced it to all platforms. from a psychology student pov: you do not need to do anything to manifest. I feel as though a lot of psychologists said you need to work in order to get your desire, is because we were all taught that we need to work for everything in order to get to where you want to be. but that is just bull$hit. we know that the only thing we need to do in order to get our desire is to change self. everything happens in the mind first. every conversation, every action happens within you first. me and my psychology teacher both think this. almost every psychology teacher I have met said this. even a really big psychology professor said this in my hometown.

the only true manifestation law is the law of assumption.

also I really hope you were talking about the law of attraction, cuz one things for sure- I still cannot translate from english to hungarian very good 😃.

[hirukochan]

A lovely reader drew one of my favourite scenes from Your tears are of no relevance to me! It turned out so pretty!

Chapter 19 is so heart-wrecking, beautiful and wickedly hot. It's one of my favourite chapters. Snape's thoughts, the way dove reclaims some of the freedom she never had growing up and the development in their relationship is just so good.

Your tears has always been a very self-indulgent fic and I still love going back and reading it.

For those who haven't read the fic in a while, here is an excerpt from the chapter in question.

“I- I- she is gone- she is-” His voice leaves him. He buries his face in the crook of her neck. “She is alive, Severus.” “You don’t understand!” Snape bellows. Dumledore takes a step forward and Snape holds her body protectively, snarling at Dumbledore like a wild beast defending his mate from a hostile. “She is gone! Her mind- her mind- she gave up- I was too late…” He shakes his sleeve over his hand and gently wipes the half-dried tears from her face. The cut on her cheek isn’t bleeding anymore. He feels the burning desire to douse the spot in pure alcohol to remove any residue of Rowle spit from her skin. He runs his fingers through her hair, smoothing it down where Rowle’s hands left it dishevelled. “You love her.” Again with that tone suggesting it is unbelievable Snape may feel any human emotions aside from rage and hatred. “You and your crazy obsession with love!” Snape scoffs. “I wanted to fuck her. Simple. I am a fucked up piece of shit that has been lusting after his student and used the first opportunity he got to do that! I enjoy her pain and misery as much as it tears me apart!” He is selfish. Selfish for wanting to have her. To feel her. He is selfish for accepting all her kindnesses, claiming her affections for himself knowing full well he is undeserving of them. He is darkness and she is light and he snuffed it out! “I know you are not that. You are neither simple, nor evil.” “Do you? Do you fucking know that, Albus? When I came to you, on that hilltop, when I begged you to save the woman I loved you said I disgust you. You never get to speak to me about love again!” “I warned you, Severus. I warned you this would not end well. Had you come to me before asking Voldemort to give her to you, I would have told you not to do it. She compromised you.” “Compromised- In one breath you speak of love and in the next, you are some cold-hearted cruel puppet master! When did you lose yourself, Albus? Did that curse fuck up more than just your hand?”

“We cannot afford this. One person is not worth losing a wa-” “SHE IS!” The fire in the fireplace explodes, singing the carpet in front of it and colouring the bricks black with soot. Snape is shivering with barely contained wrath. At Dumbledore and the Dark Lord and the whole godforsaken world! “She is everything we are fighting for! She is good and kind, innocent. She has been a victim of this war from the second she was born and yet she didn’t turn into some cold, cruel little monster! She is good when nobody ever fucking taught her how! Her father gave her up as atonement! She is the only one her sisters have left! If we can’t even protect those we are fighting for- then we are doing something wrong.” “Girls like her will always suffer greatly in wars.” “And your reaction to that should not be silent surrender! It should be to aim to do better!” “You have to return to Voldemor-” “Get out.” “Severus-” “OUT!” “If Voldemort believes you have deserted him-” “They tried to rape her!” “Your role is crucial-” “You can take your war, Albus, and shove it up your arse! I’m done! I’m done with you and your- your sanctimonious act! Perhaps you ought to spend a day like all your little puppets and pawns you like to shove around, pretending like they aren’t real people, trenching through the mud to live up to your impossible standards you yourself can’t even fulfil!”  “You are shaken, I understand-” “You don’t understand shit! She went through hell and you had the audacity to ask more of her like she  owes  you something! When I was at my lowest you decided to put the boot in some more and take advantage of me and you have been doing it ever since! And I allowed it because I owe Lily to protect her son. Well, I owe another Lily to save her mommy! Now. Get the fuck out before I remove you.” Snape’s heart is pounding in his chest. He has no idea where he took the strength to say those words to Dumbledore after thinking them for years. Dumbledore turns, but stops once he reaches the door. “For what it’s worth, Severus, I truly hope the girl can come back to herself.”  With the object of his rage gone it withers into a pathetic puddle of self-loathing and despair. “Come on, dove.” He whispers and lifts her head, pressing a tender kiss to her forehead. “Don’t do this, please- after everything you have survived, you can’t give up- Of course she can, Severus you stupid piece of shit. How fucking selfish to ask you to fight- please, if you can hear me, please come back to me. You don’t owe me anything and I have no right to ask this, but please please come back. You don’t know me- you think I’m strong and that I know what I’m doing but I don’t know shit. I have no idea what I am doing and I don’t know how much longer I can keep going. You asked me- you asked me once to make you forget, to tell you what happened in that cell wasn’t real. I know exactly how you feel - I haven’t known what is real, what parts of me are Dumbledore’s spy or the Dark Lord’s spy or  me  for twenty years. Please-  I need you.” Snape doesn’t know what he expected. As if pouring out his heart would do anything. He gathers her into his arms and flicks his wand to open the hidden door leading upstairs. “We’ll patch you up- I’ll take away your pain, maybe, maybe you’ll decide to come back out then, yes?”

[theomnicode]

Wait a second, actually parallel worlds?

I've made meta in the 2 years past about parallel worlds during the Saitama and Garou fight and you can read it below, but I cannot be arsed to synopsis in lenght because I actually need to get this meta out here very, very fast and I'm on a schedule. In short, Genos' huge speech was yet another hint of things to come that I discuss below.

But the thing that hit me today and the thing I've just plain ignored for two months cuz I've been doing other stuff is what empty void has said in second to last chapter 201, You pass.

He just casually confirmed parallel worlds. And nobody is talking about this. Guess multiverse is too mainstream lol.

Potentially major future spoilers below, beware

Thing to note here, is that he's using God's powers to apparently enter outside of causality where he casually manipulates parallel universes to perform his Dimensional Slash, which is bonkers on it's own BUT

Here is what Blast said during a yet another retconned chapter. I joked before that retconned chapters are just parallel universes at this point but it's starting to look like it's not a joke anymore.

Empty void has a key to entering this higher dimension where God resides. This is retconned. Funny, because it's a key information. You wouldn't want this on enemy's hand.

Essentially what he means is that the higher dimension where God resides is outside the causality of the universe, where God can manipulate the parallel worlds because that too is explicitly stated to be a power from him. This is what Empty void essentially does but way smaller because of his capacity. Ergo, that means...OPM God has probably, hypothetically, more than likely, manipulated the timeline to his benefit. Because he's a multiversal being. The only thing stopping him is being locked away, but Blast has pointed out interaction with God's dimension has increased rapidly. (173, secret intel) He is definitely doing something because it's a two-way street. Once the pandora's box of influencing timelines and parallel worlds is opened, it cannot be closed anymore.

That's why he's looking for sacrifices to become his pawns, beings that are/can become strong enough to manipulate the laws of causality (thanks Genos for that tidbit). To access the majority of his powers to help him exterminate humanity.

That's why the retcons may actually be parallel worlds canon, but on a meta level they got retconned by OPM God and so won't make it to physical publishing. Which is very meta and I love it but oh my god...

Blast maybe knows a LOT more than he lets on but decides to not basically cause mass panic by unveiling more information. Or he is making guestimates because he doesn't know the true extent of his power and the truth is far too terrifying to comprehend.

Empty void's capability to casually manipulate parallel worlds is already a horrifying concept but he's so lacking in capability to what a being of untold, limitless power could actually do with such a thing it's not even funny. We need to think bigger. Maybe that's why it has chosen the moniker God for itself... indeed sounds like a godly power when he can just Thanos snap.

Almost like...divine power?

It's crazy to think that the only reason the timelines in 164 diverged is because Garou no longer passed the vibe check from Saitama that decided whether he desperately needed help or a decisive blow to end the fight.

It seems likely that Saitama using his causality-defying powers is summoning God to their dimension too, simply by using them. That's why more and more stronger monsters keep appearing, despite Saitama disposing plenty monsters. I wouldn't wanna be in his shoes if this is found out to be true, that in his quest for power, he may have inadverently doomed them all. Nor I'd want to hear about the public outcry.

Closing note, more old metas from myself pondering about if OPM god has a lot more power and influence that we realize, plus secondary meta about Saitama casually bending reality. There's also metas about God's motifs being seen extremely early in the series besides the obvious moon (ceiling lamp, Garou speech bubble outline) which could indicate very subtle subliminal messages used to influence Saitama, but for the life of me I cannot find that one atm.

*nods thoughtfully* Yep, all makes sense now. The plot thickens.

You know what? I don't blame Psykos for going nutters when she found out her world is just a toy for some inter-dimensional being bent on destroying mankind because it reduced mankind to being savages who just shit the bed.

(Legit I'm reminded of P12 boss from FF14 lol and now that banger of a song is playing in my head too. Same archetype. Those who've played know who I'm talking about :D)

[blubushie]

having an ideal weight is a sign of an eating disorder. its rooted in fatphobia and restrictive eating ("making sure u dont overindulge") is just because ur afraid of being fat. u. have. an. eating. disorder. unlearn ur fatphobia and get help

Mate you have GOT to be trolling me. Please you cannot be this stupid.

I was a fat teen growing up. Being fat sucks for me. It's not about body image issues it's about "it's a pain in the arse and makes the things I enjoy doing not enjoyable anymore". My weight has fluctuated most my life and I feel the worst when I'm overweight and it affects my ability to be active and causes me joint pain.

Me wanting to maintain the weight that I'm healthiest at (where my stamina isn't impacted, where I'm not out of breath going up a sharp incline, where I can be active without joint pain, where I don't eat so much that I feel bloated, where I don't feel hot constantly) DOES NOT MEAN I HAVE AN EATING DISORDER WHAT?? Wanting to get back to my active healthy weight doesn't mean I have an eating disorder especially when I'm doing it through diet and exercise and not just starving myself or with drugs.

ESPECIALLY when you don't know how much I weigh?? For all you know my goal is to lose just five kilos and drop from 70kg to 65kg.

(For reference I weigh about 80kg now and I want to get down to 65kg... Which is a healthy weight for a man of my height considering the amount of muscle I have and how I'm built.)

Pack it up lads this one's an idiot