#i cannot afford to move in August when my lease is up and i will be stuck here for another year

[girlfriendsofthegalaxy]

why would anyone make a refrigerator with glass shelves where the glass doesn’t lift out so you can clean it. why are mine encased in a horrible plastic rim i had to crack off and hopefully super glue back together. *I* know what i spilled in this fridge (cracked jar of pickles) but what the fuck did my landlord spill in this fridge and why is there so much brown sludge trapped in the plastic edge

[ausetkmt]

National Review: Absurd Government Regulations Are Keeping People Out of Their Own Beds

sight. So policy-makers passed an ordinance that criminalizes camping on public land. People guilty of unauthorized sleeping sued, and the Supreme Court heard oral arguments on April 22, 2024. The case, Grants Pass v. Johnson, tests how far cities can go to regulate what happens on public property. But cities would not have so much homelessness in the first place if they did not actively stop affordable housing on private property.

This is what happened to Chasidy Decker, who lives 500 miles east of Grants Pass in Meridian, Idaho. Her problem is not that she lacks a bed. She already has one inside her tiny home on wheels, a 252-square-foot vehicle that she parks on private property. Her landlord leases space to her behind a fence in his side yard, which has hookups for water, sewer, and electricity. Yet Meridian will not let Decker sleep under her own roof. They warned her about expensive fines the day after she moved in. So, she has been homeless since August 2022.

Her trailer sits empty, while she scrambles for other accommodations.

Decker and her landlord sued to be left alone on private property. Our public-interest law firm, the Institute for Justice, represents them. A district-court trial ended in April, and they expect a decision by late summer.

Meanwhile, similar zoning disputes are unfolding nationwide. Many cities and counties oppose private housing solutions, which has contributed to a crisis affecting nearly every part of the economy. One charity, Tiny House Hand Up, tried to build affordable housing on its own land in Calhoun, Ga. But zoning officials stopped the project because of square-footage minimums. Calhoun residents must pay for bigger homes, even if they want smaller homes.

Anita Adams encountered a different roadblock when she tried to build a house in Seattle for her family. Zoning laws allowed construction, but the permit price included a $39-per-square-foot “housing affordability” fee—which added $80,000 to the project. Seattle demanded this payment to its public-housing fund before Adams could break ground. She and her family cannot afford the expense, meaning the city is effectively preventing them from building on their own property.

Amanda Root, a disabled, older resident living on a fixed income in Sierra Vista, Ariz., just wants to stay put on the same lot she has owned and occupied for more than 20 years. But code enforcers want her gone, citing a technicality: Her trailer has axles, and her street is zoned for mobile homes without axles. “I have looked at different options,” Root says. “There is nothing out there that I can afford. A tent? Where am I going to go? Behind Food City?”

Tiny House Hand Up, Adams, and Root all sued with representation from our firm. Lower-income families suffer the most from misguided policies such as these. Common tactics include occupancy caps, prohibitions on multifamily housing, and overregulation of accessory dwelling units, or “granny flats.” Shawnee, Kan., even criminalizes roommates. A 2022 ordinance makes it illegal for friends to split rent in single-family homes.

Multiple studies show what must be done: Let people build and operate housing on their own property. Yet real reform remains elusive — hindered on one side by not-in-my-backyard activists who think they should have control over how their neighbors live, and on the other side by people who believe it is immoral for developers to earn a profit — as if there were some other reason they would be willing to build.

Meanwhile, millions of ordinary families are getting pushed past their limits as the cost of living rises. People with mortgages are downsizing or consolidating. People who lease are falling behind. And those on the fringes are becoming homeless. Already, half of U.S. homeowners and renters are struggling to keep up.

The Grants Pass case deals with the fallout. Zoning reform could address homelessness before it happens. The Constitution provides the necessary firepower through the due-process clause of the 14thAmendment. State constitutions use similar language. Put in simple terms, these provisions mean the government cannot restrict activity on private land without good reason.

Decker does not want to sleep in a park. She has a bed. She just needs permission to use it.

[fancykraken]

Preface: I didn't intend to write so much, but I guess I really needed to vent and get my feelings out. 🤣

I hate landlords so much. I wish I could just have one that was a decent person and not either abusive, some kind of bully, blackmailing or not broken tenant laws on one or multiple occasions.

Major friction between my current landlord and us (as well as some other tenants but that's their own situation) has me really, really scared and I'm freaking out because our lease is up again in August. I'm so worried because the reason my mum and I have not moved already is because of the rent. The rent we pay is based on rates that were average 10 years ago even with my landlord raising our rent each year when we renew our lease. Rent has basically tripled in the last 10 years all over the city and surrounding cities. A two-bedroom suite or apartment is now $3k a month or more on average. I can't afford that and the thought of going back to where my mum and were 10+ years ago of homelessness, welfare, food banks, and being at the complete mercy of abusive people because we had zero choice is sending me to a really bad place mentally.

My current landlord had the huge evergreen tree next to the house we rent our suite in "trimmed". And by "trimmed" I mean she had nearly every branch taken off that wasn't below 25 feet. Our privacy from the apartment buildings next to us is gone, our shade is gone, and since there are no branches there's nowhere to hang our two bird feeders anymore which has really upset my mum. Our upstairs neighbours are furious about all this as well so at least it's just not us.

But one of the biggest things that is bugging me happened yesterday. It's relatively small potatoes, but there was this one little stub left on the tree low enough to hang the suet cake feeder for the birds so that's what my mum did. She loves the woodpeckers, starlings, and all the birds that come by and eat from it. My landlord was by with her maintenance person to help with outside repairs while my mum was out (I work from home so I was busy working and didn't see this happen). She took down the suet cake feeder and had the maintenance guy cut off the stub on the tree so my mum couldn't hang it back up again.

It's upset my mum a lot and me as well. It just feels so invasive and being bullied.

I've talked to my therapist about some of this last week and have resources I can check out, but I just feel like I have nowhere to turn and generally feel trapped because I live in a city that is so astronomically expensive that even working full time doesn't get me anywhere. And I have my mum to take care of but that's a whole other can of worms that I just cannot think about right now.

Anyway, landlords suck.

[majikstan]

Latest News in a while

How can I even put all this into words, given the current situation hat I am now in, from multiple fronts, again it attacks my self esteem and self confidence.

The Job Ends in August and continued communications for Contractor verses Employment

Ever since I lost my dream job when my former employer who now only wants to contract contractors and expects me to become a contractor instead of an employee, I was employed 4 years ago as a full time employee, my former boss no longer wants to support a wage earner, as I had explained countless times I require job security, and he said he cannot provide that anymore, he had been pushing us to move into being our own self employed, soul trader contractors even since November 2021 but the final change was back in August of last year, The 27th to be exact.

And for months he has been persistently keeping in contact trying to send me many offers that again all expect working as Contractor, estimate on the tasks before having the work approved to work on., then after months of trying to convince me that Contractor was the only way, he then starts to attack me on the quality of some of my 3D model, work claiming he had shown certain other contractors and claiming that they had criticized about the quality or the standards, given that when I first modeled those particularly models I was still teaching myself how to best model that topic and I produced them at the time based on what had been asked, I supplied the best I could do at the time and had plans to update these with what I now have known since at least 2021 but never got a chance to put those changes through them all, only started to improve on certain aspects of them. And he used to brag to many of the larger clients about those models and claimed at the time that I was one of the best 3D modelers he had ever known, Interesting.

The criticism really hit me back in the core of me and again I started to feel like I was not good enough. My creative spirit was really hit like I was punched, and for that weekend I had troubles to gain any inspiration to do anything creative.

My father when I spoke to to him over the phone, said something in the call that made me think, if my work really was not that good then why would my former boss still be persistent to me all this time, unless he still respected me to an extent and maybe was fearful of losing me to another employer? In any case he gave me no choice, he no longer wants to support wage earners and full time employment, and only wants to contract on a task by task basis, that's not job security.

Next thing is with the increasing cost of living the rent.

Just went up recently, as I had to resign a new lease but the cost now is far above what is suitable for this place, I cannot afford to stay here too much longer. Yes I have to break lease soon I had no choice in the re-sign of the lease document over a month ago. I am alone here I have no one, but this now pressures further. Given that I currently have not picked up another job still, I am still on my savings. This continues on to the next topic

The Move or the relocation of a big move after what had been 25 years of living up in Brisbane, Queensland, Australia, I now am being forced to move back to Melbourne.

This is a plan that was first offered back in 2019 if at the same situation if I had not landed a new job by the then Christmas for that year, then I would have been forced to move back to Melbourne and stay at my sisters for a time and as such like my sister has said "To Start again!". This offer has been offered again. but I am not simple and as a researcher this is going to be a pain when most of or almost all of my hard-copy research would be stored offsite in a storage place. Giving limited access. if I ever need to review until I could eventually afford to get another place of my own, (down there).

This Move having to pack and having no help up here I have no mates or buddies I am on my own, and theirs allot to pack, given that I am not simple and can never be simple, I am researcher, developer, Historian among many things. I cannot just simple get rid of all of my life, I am not some blank canvas to be messed with. Family say they will organize the actual movers and the storage location, for this move but, its just hard, to go interstate again after 25 years after being established up here, and all this is not even my fault but the greedy government as always.

No Partner still and no local support to keep me going

I have no partner, and no one still has any interest for me in this country. I'm 46 and still have not got what most other people I know have, especially in my family, even my oldest nephew has a partner.

Why is it that I still find that no one in this country Australia ever has any interest to want to know me, let alone want to hang out with me. Why is that yet so many far overseas wish they could, even though most of my overseas contacts are not that close in contact. But who can I have?, I lost my last GF who was from overseas, in 2013, again because of Greedy Government.

A hug with someone would really be so nice, from just about anyone. Such hugs I have not felt in such a long time.

Conclusion

All this plus some other things not spoken here, how do I keep pushing through, when I feel like I am a failure to my life of my last 25 years? am I really, I feel like a loser, and also again still having the Not Good enough flag and others effecting my self esteem, self confidence and believing that I will ever get somewhere better, Its a huge back step, from renting a small single bedroom self contained unit (Shared laundry and an enclosed Garage) to having to live in a single room with most of my stuff stored off-site.

Sometimes it feels just that hard that I almost want to give-up, only family want me in this country anyway.

[sunbutter-fem]

PLEASE HELP MY FRIEND!

Their partner and them are victims of racist and lesbophobic housing discrimination, and they need new housing by December 1st. They've haven't received enough through their GoFundMe, and they're going to need a whole lot more in the next two weeks. They even admitted to me that they're not asking for the actual amount they need! Today is their birthday (Nov 12th), so if you could please donate and/or share, it would help make their day a little bit better. 🌻

The GoFundMe reads:

"We are trying to raise funds so that we can pay both our rent for this month and our security deposit for our new place. We’re being evicted in the middle of a pandemic. The current 'eviction ban' only covers non-payment of rent cases, ours was a holdover tenancy case. Our landlord refused to let us renew our lease back in April sending us a notice to vacate when the ban was first put in place, and we were only temporarily shielded. Once certain criteria in the 'ban' expired this summer, she jumped at the chance to evict us as soon as September.

"We have endured a literal year of legal harassment from January 2020 to now December 2020 being discriminated against for having been an interracial gay couple. When we first moved in, I had a good impression from when I had lived in this same building, renting from the same person in 2016. According to the records from 2016 I paid rent late 5 of the 11 months that I lived here as a single white person. That is almost HALF the tenure. Not once did I ever see an eviction notice, sometimes I wasn’t even charged late fees, and I didn’t pay the ones that were applied. January 2020 happened to be the first time we paid rent late here and ever since then we have been served with monthly eviction court.

"During our stay here we have endured many environmental hazards like mushrooms growing from the carpet, mold in our walls and ceiling, rat feces in the laundry room, not to mention 2/4 stove coils do not work, oven is not functional, and there’s a roach infestation in the entire building. In September we noticed she delayed processing our rental payment, we paid on the 4th and she did not add it until two and a half weeks later. That same month we had literal sewage flow down our walls from the upstairs apartment.

"When I contacted the landlord she was condescending calling it a 'normal occurrence in a multi-unit building' adding the formal threat of eviction. The next day we had two notices on our door, then in October we had court where we made a deal to extend our stay and agree to be out by December 1st. Due to the fact we have no lease, we are expected to not just pay November’s rent here but also come up with the funds to afford a security deposit for the new place and of course the U-Haul. Geeisha was getting unemployment due to COVID closing restaurants, we were hoping to use those funds to move but our cat got sick during the last week of August , racking up a $2.5k+ bill. Geeisha has only recently been working two jobs with a potential third one in the upcoming week to try to come up with all of this money, but unfortunately I am disabled and cannot work."

"*Any* amount helps and your help is deeply appreciated. Thank you in advance!"

Even with all this, they're only asking for $500! (they definitely need more than that)

$245 / $500

They're currently a little under halfway to their goal.

Again, they can accept donations via any of the following:

GoFundMe: https://bit.ly/328VZA6

Geeisha’s Cashapp: $gvldenaoc

Geeisha's Venmo: @gvldenaoc

Geeisha's Paypal: gvldenaoc

Luna's Paypal: www.paypal.me/apoorwitch

Luna's Cashapp/Venmo: $spookysapphic

PLEASE SHARE even if you cannot donate.

[loquaciousquark]

I hope you're doing well! I know you posted about a stressful situation last month, and I hope it's resolved itself. Sending good wishes you you and Hamlet!

Thank you so very much for checking in on me! I really do appreciate it. An update to that post under the cut.

Carol, who moved in with me on May 28, is still here. Right now, we have set a tentative move-out goal of the first or second week of August, but this is pending an apartment application that she hopes to finalize on Monday and a job situation that is a complete mess.

Basically, according to my limited understanding, Carol is licensed to teach in Florida. Alabama has a reciprocity clause with Florida, but it must be applied for. Carol has recently begun this process, but her teaching license(s?) is (are?) set to expire in December unless she passes certain exams. She’s already passed one for...general middle and high school teaching, I think, but failed a math exam. She has an art history exam Monday afternoon and expects to pass. I hope so, because she’s been doing nothing but watching Netflix and shopping for houses for the last few days in her new 2017 Jeep Cherokee.

I remain unspeakably grateful to my parents for teaching me financial literacy, because until I witnessed Carol’s decision-making, I had no idea how hard it was for some people to not spend money unwisely. 

As a reminder, Carol is dead broke. She has $153,000 in debt across student loans, medical bills, Czech and US taxes, and some personal loans she would like to repay to friends for helping her. She is unemployed and has no support from her family and has relied on couch surfing at friends’ and acquaintances’ homes since last summer for housing. Since moving in with me, she has been trying to find somewhere to live that would accept her with all her debt and her nonexistent US employment history for the last ten years. Based on what she’s said, I think she has about $9k in the bank--or did, until last week.

In short, she needs a car, a job, and a home, and as far as I can tell she doesn’t care which order they come in.

Two weeks ago, she was offered a position in a rural town about 30 minutes from where I live. It’s a small, very country town which desperately needs a special education teacher, something I think Carol really does have a passion for. However, because she hasn’t finished the reciprocity licensure application yet, they’re having a lot of roadblocks with her paperwork, compounded by the fact that when she left Prague last year, she left all her important documentation behind: things like her birth certificate, her social security card, and her letters of recommendation, which for some reason she did not have electronic backups of. The principal has been trying to get what she needs from Carol for two weeks. Carol is constantly saying that things are “in process” but has nothing to show for it.

As far as we can tell, the job is still hers, but the school year starts August 13th and she still hasn’t been approved by the Board of Education because the paperwork is still not finished on her end. She did not attempt to replace her birth certificate or social security card until they needed it for the application. (Her friend in Prague--and I am beginning to realize she uses the word “friend” for anyone she’s met longer than sixty seconds), who frantically packed up all her belongings when she realized she would not be able to go back to the city, cannot ship her belongings or go through them for the important paperwork until next summer, as she and her husband are currently vacationing in Rome for a year.

Carol decided last night she is also going to apply for some online Department of Defense position--I didn’t understand the details and don’t really want to know, except that it’s also teaching and some administration. We’ll see how it works out. She is growing increasingly annoyed at the principal’s requests for paperwork completion, which baffles me.

So, job: shrug? Maybe?

Car next, then, but this whole mess also goes back to the financial literacy thing. My parents have always been extremely frugal (pennywise, as my dad would say), and from childhood they made it very clear to us to not buy things you couldn’t afford. They’ve never had a car payment in my memory, and they paid off their house about ten years ago. This means they drove a lot of junkers for a very long time, and for a very long time we had very few vacations, but now they’re fully financially stable and debt-free and my mom has a car that she drove off the lot brand new that they paid cash in hand for. 

If I had been in Carol’s situation, I would have found a cheap, mostly reliable used car that probably wasn’t going to explode on me and drive that as long as I could while saving up for housing. I did in fact drive her to look at several used cars, most of which would have been even outside my expected budget (hers, as it happens, is larger even than that, because one of her overseas friends was willing to contribute $5000 to the cost of a vehicle). (I paid $6500 for my current car, a 2004, in college in 2012 with 70,000 miles on it at the time, and have driven it ever since.)

She rejected all of them because they did not have good “energy” and “feelings.” One she was willing to buy at $3700, but told the seller to go pay for his own inspection (once I explained to her what mechanical inspections were as a concept), so they ghosted her. She also is extremely afraid of head gasket failure--I don’t know why, since she knows nothing about cars--and has assumed all vehicles she has driven are on the verge of it, so after the first week she refused to even look at a vehicle without a warranty.

This means she exclusively limited herself to used dealership options, which I’m just going to come right out and say was monumentally stupid. I don’t know if any car dealers follow me, so I’m sorry if I am misperceiving this, but in my experience almost every dealer I’ve gone to has been aggressive, manipulative, and extremely predatory in their interest rates. I cannot think of a riskier course of action in abject debt than to try to cut a deal with a car dealer for the sake of a warranty I doubt will cover that much truly expensive failure in the long run anyway.

On Thursday, Carol bought a $20,000 2017 Jeep Cherokee from a dealership down the road. I don’t know what she put down. I do know she did not use her friend’s money (why not??) and I know her interest rate on the car loan is 4%, which she is extremely proud of and which horrifies me. She also “persuaded” them into a limited warranty that will cover the vehicle up to 100,000 miles (currently at 42k, and they ~only offer it for cars under 40,000 miles~). I can’t tell you how bad an idea I think all this is.

Thursday night, as she was regaling me with stories of her negotiating prowess, she also tells me she has decided to buy a house. She’s sick of renting, and somehow, someone somewhere managed to get her approved for up to $120,000 in a home loan. She already has $150k in debt, another $20k from the car, and now wants to buy a house. She was delighted that she could make the minimum 7% down payment, even though it would wipe out every cent she has left and leave her less than $500 to her name for moving expenses, utilities, food, title registration, etc. afterwards.

She doesn’t even have a secure job yet.

However, this plan seems to have fallen through. She went out with a realtor several times this weekend and came home the last time in great, heaving sobs, because she can’t find the 3bed 2bath she wanted in her price range. (For reference, most homes in this area go between 200k - 250k right now for 2-3bed 2ba, and the closer you get to the city--I have about a 20 minute commute--the higher it gets. My next door neighbor sold her 3bed 2.5ba for >300k three months ago, and Carol knew this.) She was absolutely devastated that the only things in her range were “tiny little ugly flipped houses” and “the ghetto.” The realtor basically said she wasn’t going to waste any more of her time. Carol repeatedly told me how grateful I should be that I got in at the price point I did a few years back, because no “normal people” could ever afford to break into the market again.

I tried to tell her that it was because I lived in with a roommate in very cheap housing and then a cell of a 1bed 1ba apartment for eight years while I saved money, but if nothing else, I’ve learned I’m not allowed to compare our situations or histories or offer advice of any kind except “go ahead and buy what you want,” because that only makes her cry harder. In the end, she has decided to give up on the house for now and settle for the absolute last thing in the world she wanted, an apartment with a lease.

To be honest, until she has a signed contract in hand, I half-expect this lease to fall through as well. I have tried to offer what I think is sensible advice and been ignored or rebuffed. I have tried to offer a sympathetic ear and ended up with her sobbing uncontrollably on me--heaving, body-wracking sobs--over and over again with me trapped in my own home, providing endless emotional support for a girl I don’t even like. I have tried to encourage her to do the things she wants to do, since she’s going to do them anyway, and when she gets “negative energy” after the purchases (buyer’s remorse, I think, that one little inkling of sense saying maybe it wasn’t a great idea to buy a $20,000 car or an $1100 brand new iPhone without a job), she blames it on the exact thing I said I thought might be good and makes me feel like I have now directly contributed to a negative outcome after poor decision-making.

For the record, when she says these things to me she is not saying, and has never said, them directly at me. She has never blamed me in any way for a negative outcome. She is not consciously trying to manipulate me or abuse me or take advantage of my help. She has never once asked me for money or job connections or for me to use any of my stability to unfairly or unethically get her something she needs. She is just completely absorbed in her own (rightfully absorbing) mess of a situation, and I think just completely unaware of how much of an emotional black hole she has become. There are no problems except her problems. There are no needs except her needs, and everyone around her has to understand how hard she has it at all times. 

So, we’ll see. I am praying that the apartment works out next week. The owner seems to want to work with her, which is a hopeful sign. Good thoughts would be appreciated.

--

Aside from all of this, work has gotten extremely complicated. I’m not going to go into all of it now, but one of my jobs is to create an extremely detailed schedule for students in clinic. This is used to schedule patients in each service--if we have this many students, we can have this many patient slots per half-day, etc. Last week, two students were out unexpectedly, one who broke her arm the day before she was supposed to begin, and one who had a terrible anxiety attack and thought the symptoms were actually COVID. That student was tested and cleared negative, but Student Health requires a two-week quarantine anyway, so she was not allowed to return.

This meant that we now had multiple patients per day with no one to see them. We tried to reschedule as many as we could, but we still ended up with multiple overbooks. This is extremely stressful for me as both a provider, an instructor, and a human being who hates having other people wait on her in a professional capacity. We got through the week, but not without several painful bumps, and it’s looking like there will be more soon.

I also woke up to an email this morning that one of my favorite students (yes, I have favorites, I’m sorry), had a completely unexpected death in the immediate family and had to rush home. This is a very, very sweet, very smart girl who has worked unbelievably hard over the past year to do well in this program and in my courses, and I am just devastated for her. One of her friends is willing to cover her clinic, so the impact will be minimal on that side, but to have this happen during this country’s hellhole handling of this pandemic...I can’t even imagine it.

All of this isn’t even touching COVID. The President’s side has won in that sense--I don’t even register the numbers anymore--but as of last week our dean sent out messaging that implied that with our state’s failure to contain the spread, new discussions were going to be happening soon regarding our August start. We already had committed to full hybrid scheduling: all lectures online, in-person labs only where absolutely necessary to continue advancement in the program, and those labs limited to two per room with full PPE, but if they decide even that can’t happen, I don’t know what the fuck I’m going to do. I cannot make competent doctors over Zoom. I can’t. At some point they have to touch other people and look at other people’s eyes. They have to be able to check real, in-person blood pressure. They have to look at genuine eye movements and ocular surfaces in person and I cannot and will not let them enter clinic until they have the practice and the time and the practicals behind them. I fucking refuse to endanger the public for sixty years because someone in an office somewhere decided a timetable is more important than a patient keeping their ability to see, and I’m ready to fight administration on this if they try to push it.

But if I win the fight, what next? They just...don’t enter clinic next year. They don’t enter my program. I don’t know what they do in the meantime, as this lab meets four mornings a week and the lecture twice. The course is delayed until next year or whenever we have the virus under control again, and suddenly my fall semester sure looks like I’ll be being paid to stay at home and count carpet fibers. I don’t think they’ll fire me--no one else wants to teach my course anyway--but if I win this fight I might put myself right into furlough in the process.

I could be borrowing trouble, I know. They could come back and say that after review, our system and safety protocols (all extremely conservative) are indeed safe enough and we can proceed as we want. They could say that our limited in-person option for lectures (we have several gigantic lecture halls that could easily socially distance) is the only thing that needs to go. They could say that we just need to have smaller lab groups--hellish on me, but doable.

But it’s one more element of stress in my life that I just can’t handle worrying about right now, which is why I’ve been bouncing back and forth between random fics and oneshots (that mermaid one was feverishly written on a single evening Carol spent at her mom’s house) and pouring an ungodly amount of hours into Animal Crossing. At least there I have some control over what happens next.

Sorry, guys. I know this is not the happy update I was hoping for. I’ll try to check in again next month and we’ll see where things end up.

[bbhl-incporated]

Urgent - At Risk of Homelessness

Hi guys,

Tl;dr is I am in dire need of money to put down on a new apartment because I have to move out of this sublet next Thursday (August 22nd) and without a security deposit nad first month’s rent, I have nowhere to go. At this point, even a dollar would help (if everyone following me gave a dollar, I’d have rent for nearly a year). I have Cash App, Venmo (@Brittany-Smith-50), and Paypal. At the very least, please continue reading and reblogging if you can’t help out. Please help your resident FGLI* college graduate avoid homelessness! 

If you haven’t seen me online very much recently, it’s because I’ve been diligently going through months of job hunting and applications, much to no avail. I finished a yearlong fellowship, returned to my college town (My hometown is very rural and has 0 job opportunities currently, hence why I did not go home), and have been met with rejection after rejection after rejection. Even during my fellowship, I applied to what I could in the U.S. considering where I was (most jobs won’t even consider you if you don’t already live nearby), and got rejected. I’ve applied to scores jobs related to my skills, degree, experience, target career, jobs I would have never considered previously, etc. and absolutely nothing has panned out. I cannot rely on my family because they have too many medical bills and far too little income. My mother had to forgo work to take care of her mother, who has no one to take care of her but my mother, and she only has a retired teacher’s income to support them both and take care of her medical bills from a recent heart attack and necessary surgery. My mom cannot work or she runs the risk of losing my grandmother; she has suffered a stroke and heart attack and each time she only survived because she had someone able to call an ambulance / take her to the hospital in time. She’s still recovering from her recent surgery.

To make matters worse, despite the town being familiar and having some friends, no one can take me in to house me when I have to move out this upcoming Thursday. Everyone either has no more room, or a restriction placed by their landlord/contract. I am therefore at risk of homelessness because my money has dried up and I cannot afford the massive expense of putting down a deposit and first month’s rent. At the very least I need enough money to purchase an Airbnb for 2 weeks so I can have a roof over my head and land even a temporary or part-time job to satisfy an income requirement to land a lease.

I need at least $500 to have a roof over my head for 2 weeks via Airbnb and I will need $1600-$1800 if I have to go the security deposit route. Either way, it’s more money than I have right now. Please please please send whatever you can right now and reblog this post. This is extremely urgent and I’m in a highly dangerous situation. Connecticut is not a safe place to be in this kind of situation.

Cash App | Paypal | Venmo (if Venmo link doesn’t work, username is Brittany-Smith-50)

(*FGLI = First-Generation Low Income! I’m the first in my immediate family to go to college and we’re barely even considered working poor... :( )

[ayrenn]

Please help me eat

Hi, my name is Sarah, but most people on here know me as Ayrenn. I’ve had two other donation posts before, and both have helped immensely, but I’m in an even trickier financial situation than I was before. 

Last year, I was kicked out of home by my parents. I moved in with a guy I was seeing, and at the start of this year, we co-signed a lease together. He stayed for two months, before he broke the lease, leaving me to pay rent for a place that I cannot afford. And because of my lease agreements, I would have to continue to pay rent until next January, or until I found someone else to rent this place. I have been searching since March, to no avail. So I am stuck here.

My welfare barely covers my rent, leaving me only $44 a month to spend on my other living expenses. Foods, utility bills, travel costs (because I travel to university.) It was only because of the donations in the past, combined with my small amount of savings, that I was able to get by. But now, I no longer have any savings. I can’t even afford to eat, because my money is going towards bills and travel expenses for university. I only eat one meal a day because it’s the only area that I can afford to make financial cuts to. I am on university placement for my current course, and my travel costs are $30 a day (there and back), because I have to take Ubers as the public transport is unreliable, and often can be just as expensive. To get where I need to go, it is a 15 minute car ride, but can take up to an hour and a half for public transport, and I would have to take 3 different kinds just to get to the place I am working at. 

I live alone. I don’t have family to help me. I can’t get a job until my course is finished in August, because I study full time, and my current placement is 40 hours a week. I’m not getting paid for these placements either. I’ve already had to beg my parents for help, and they won’t give me anything more. I don’t know what else I can do, besides asking for help again, or turning to sex work. 

The people I have depended on to keep me safe, who promised to keep me safe, have put me into a worse position than what I was when I had just been kicked out of home. Please, please help me. I don’t know what else to say except please. 

https://www.paypal.me/AyrennSarah

[chonzu]

i just realized i can’t come on here and shout ‘my roommate ripped me off 3 thousand dollars’ without context so like

Here’s the story

In April I was desperate. Because of a long string of bad luck I’d been unable to find a roommate to fill our 3bed 3bath condo and the upstairs bedroom had been vacant for some time. At that time I found Lacey, who I don’t give a shit about name dropping, because he’s a fucking piece of shit.

He moved in on May 8th, also my grad date. I felt a bit off about it because he was super fucking late after insisting he’d be there at a certain time, and I had a migraine, and I just wanted to sleep. It was okay till we got to June, and he had to start paying bills, and I didn’t get rent. So I gave him the benefit of the doubt and asked for it by a certain date.

By this time I’ve already decided I’m moving out. The third bedroom ends up vacant on Father’s Day because that roommate was moving to New York and just happened to leave on that day. I don’t hear or see Lacey for some time and he comes home one day and just decides to deep clean the whole house. At this point, I’m working as much as I possibly can and doing anything I can do to 1) get sleep and 2) get enough money to cover all the bills.

July 1st I get nothing. At the same time, I’m trying to apply for a new apartment, and I got a new job offer, and my old manager made me work EVERY SINGLE DAY of my 2 week notice. I’m trying to squeeze in a vision appointment and a dentist appointment and then found out I need to get a filling immediately or within the next few months it’d be a root canal. Okay! I tell Lacey he needs to leave by the end of the week. I wanted to press charges, but my aunt, who has a law degree, or masters, or some shit and has been working in law for a really long time, said that it wouldn’t be worth it and the money I wanted to sue him for would barely cover the fees that would come with it. Okay. Fine. I go to the police because I woke up that morning and a set of keys was gone and all the couch cushions (5) were missing. Law says that after living there 30 days whether or not someone is on the lease, they have a right to live at the house (unless they’re doing drugs or prostituting or whatever). Tenant rights. I had to get the landlord involved. Because what I was doing is illegal, and the landlord has to evict him legally, which takes 30 days.

So July 6th I have a convention to go to. It’s great. I’m having a fucking amazing time with a lot of good D&D friends I’ve met and do some board games and a 4 hour one shot. That evening I tried sushi for the first time and real ramen for the first time and when we’re watching a movie that evening Lacey tries calling me through FB like 7 times. He insists he’s going to have all the money and he just needs One More Day after already begging for one. I come home that evening at around 12:30 AM and go to bed. He comes in at 1 AM shittalking me and telling the new guy I’m a disgusting pig and he did me a favor by cleaning everything because it was covered in grime and shit (he’s a compulsive liar, I’m not surprised). So I messaged him that I can hear him and to tell the new guy I’m leaving by the end of the month. I hear his phone go off and he huffs and leaves me on read. The next day the sink is full of every single piece of silverware in the house and the counter is full of dirty dishes.

Cut to yesterday. I bought a storage unit because I’m going on vacation and if I get this apartment the move in day is August 10th. I get back late in the evening and come home to the water shut off. New guy is like, yo, what’s going on? And I explain that I cannot turn the water back on, and he has to if he is renewing the lease, because Lacey never paid me a dime and I couldn’t afford it. He runs out and gets me half of the bill and I got it back on today. But now I’m down to less than 100$ to my name (except for cash I’ve stowed away for my trip/graduation money) and I need boxes, tape, and cat food, among some other things. By this point, everything he owes me comes to about 2000 dollars. New guy, just before getting the money, tells me that he gave Lacey the first and last month’s rent and signed a paper saying that he agreed to pay the money to Lacey. And then he stops, and whispers ‘why did he ask me for the money when you’re the one who pays the rent?’ and then drops the bomb that Lacey hurriedly left yesterday morning with a haphazardly stuffed bag and neither of us are sure if he’s coming back and he still has the keys.

New coworker found court records that he’s been arrested like 7 times for drugs and doing shit on probation and now at this point he’s basically stolen 3000 dollars from me and the new guy.

I don’t know if my last paycheck this Friday will be deposited or mailed by paper. New job gets paid this week, but this is my first week, so I’m going to get first week, second week, and third week all together (all of them mailed to me, getting here ‘whenever they get here’). 

Now you might be asking, how did you let Lacey do this to you? I gave him the benefit of the doubt because I was in a very similar situation he was (homeless, working crazy jobs, just looking for a place to start new). But, since he gave me that first month’s rent, he covered himself to be able to stay for at least 60 days, 90 days max. Thankfully he ended up leaving, I think, but neither me nor the new roommate know if that’s actually going to happen. 

I told the office today that I’m leaving and not renewing the lease. I haven’t gotten a response, but I checked my spam and realized they’d sent me a very similar question about it 20 minutes prior to me sending my email, and still no response, and the office is now closed.

And I’m screaming because all of my tax return AND all of my fucking graduation money are being ripped out of my hands just to live, and I cannot get an eviction on my record if I want this apartment, and my credit has fucking tanked because my power and water keep getting shut off, and the new guy won’t renew the lease because Lacey was Probably on drugs and it made him super uncomfortable. I’m trying to get an apartment with a close friend who’s going to be moving in September and I don’t know how I’m going to survive this month, honestly, because the burnout of working retail and having no time off plus trying to adjust to new policies in a corporate office and dealing with this AND trying to at least do something fun every day and living off whatever scraps I can find while gathering change for some Monster energy drinks is....

Not a good time.

[komekoro]

I’m 25, married, and am in the most stressful five months of my life with no end in sight.

At the beginning of August 2018, my mother-in-law, who kept telling us she was sober, had a spectacular blow up as an alcoholic. So much so that we told her that she had to do a 90 day rehab program. We also tell her that until she finishes both her inpatient and out patient rehab, she cannot come back to the house because she is so unhealthy to be around. Also so she won’t just quit her program and come back home and freeload and drink. Besides being paid to care for my father-in-law, she hasn’t had a job for more than three months in the last ten years. It’s a genuine concern.

She was paid to take care of my disabled father-in-law. So we had to abruptly disrupt our entire lives, quit our jobs, move two hours away, and take care of him. He needs round the clock care due to risks of falls and seizures. Because of his disabilities after two rounds of brain cancer and a stroke, he can no longer: bathe himself alone; use an oven, stove, sharp knives; drive a car; get around without a wheelchair or walker; do laundry; put his head below his heart; or lift more than 10 lbs. This means he cannot do most household duties.

According to the State of Oregon, because he can get to the toilet on his own and because he can feed himself, we only get 36 hours of in home care a week. That is six hours a day, six days a week.

Because he needs so much care, my husband, myself, and my sister-in-law moved in to their tiny two bedroom/one bathroom apartment. The lease expires at the end of January 2019. We end up paying over $2,200 in rent and utilities each month (combo ours and theirs) for three months because we couldn’t get all of our stuff out of our house before the end of October. My husband finds the first full time job he can that has health insurance. It’s anywhere from 40-48 hours a week, and his hours are from 4pm to 2am Mon-Thurs, with an 8 possible hours of overtime on Friday. So, he starts his new routine of get up, eat, read, run any errands he needs to run (90% to pick up prescriptions), goes to work, comes home, sleep, and repeat. His weekends are just him recuperating and maybe laundry. My sister-in-law finds two jobs, but since she doesn’t drive and the bus system sucks where we live, all her time not sleeping is spent either working or getting to and from work.

My mother-in-law, along with being a raging alcoholic (we pulled over 50 empty bottles of vodka out of her bedroom alone, not including the rest of the house), is also a manipulative and lying bitch. Nothing is ever her fault, and everyone else is just out to get her. The rehab her insurance would pay for? “More institutional than I thought”. The rehab house that she said was perfect until they kicked her out was now full of lying and scheming people that just decide to kick people out for no reason if they don’t like someone. That rehab house that was $400/month and my mother-in-law just expected us to pay for. Along with using us as a free Uber. “Oh but I wouldn’t dream of imposing”.

Then, when I tell my father-in-law in November that we are FLAT BROKE from the entire situation and that we can’t now, nor will we be able to in the future, afford to pay my mother-in-law’s $400 rent, he goes ballistic and verbally attacks me, accusing me of not supporting my mother-in-law. At that point, my husband and I tell him that my husband is handling all of our family’s affairs and that his father is not to talk that way to me ever again. Cue frosty silence for a week.

The first week of January, mother-in-law gives my father-in-law a phone call at 9pm at night to let him know she is on our front porch because the rehab halfway house has kicked her out. She wants to stay at our house. Remember, we have specifically said that until she finishes her program, she cannot stay with us. Sister in law and I are afraid to even let her in the house because we don’t know if mother-in-law will ever leave if we let her in. Father-in-law literally runs over my sister-in-law with his walker to get to the door to let my mother-in-law in. I, because I do not want to be in the middle of family drama again for fear of being verbally attacked, retreat to my room, almost in a panic attack. Finally, mother-in-law’s mom agrees to let my mother-in-law stay at her house “for two nights max”. Next week we get a phone call that my mother-in-law is NOT going back to a rehab house, but is going to pay her mother rent. With what money, I have no idea.

Now, it is January and the lease is up the 31st. To save us rent money on a three bedroom place, my sister-in-law moves in with a friend of hers. I find us another apartment to rent, and am starting to get us moved. Thank goodness for MY mom, because without her, I would be the only one doing anything.

I am so exhausted from everything that honestly I just want to quit. Quit my husbands family and just check into a mental health facility for like two months.

Anyone have any tips or helpful suggestions for me or my husband? I’m so close to exhaustion that I can stick my tongue out and taste it.

[mirab3lle]

My situation has gotten much worse and I am very scared.

I’m not going to beat around this bush, I am begging you guys for help. I’ve been on this website since like 2010 and I have nothing to show for it, if I walk away with anything let it be a response to this post. 

My boyfriend broke up with me Tuesday night. We moved to Colorado together, which as you may know is a very expensive state, and I cannot afford our apartment alone. I was already worried about making my half of rent this month to begin with since I was forced out of my last job. It changed management and the woman who took over hated me, cut my full schedule down to two days, blamed one of our bartenders for being groped at the company Christmas party because she was wearing a nice dress, constantly made horrible remarks about the Hispanic kitchen staff, and tried to write me up when I called in for having a panic attack.

Needless to say, this did not improve my depression and anxiety. I actually had to stop going to my therapist because although she cut my schedule, she made sure to make one of my 2 shifts on the day I told her I had a standing weekly appointment and I would be unavailable. Now I have no income besides Lyft and I still can’t go to my therapist. Which I need desperately now that my boyfriend dumped me and I have a support group of zero people since I never made any friends in Colorado in the 2 years I’ve lived here. He was convinced I would cheat on him and wouldn’t let me. 

Our lease is through August. He hasn’t felt anything for me in a long time and expects us to just live together as friends until then but I’m having suicidal thoughts just thinking about that. But I can’t go to the hospital for it, I’ve already burned through my savings since losing my job and if I don’t find the strength to at least drive for Lyft everyday if not find a real job I will have nothing. Literally nothing. 

No friends and no roof over my head in a state where I know NO ONE. And I have 4 pet rats and a cat to think about and feed. 

If i can make it, I want to move back home to Minnesota so I can at least be with friends, but I need money to do that and I am terrified. 

I’ll need somewhere to stay where I can keep my pets, gas money, food money for me and my pets, therapy money, money to rent a storage unit so I don’t have to rebuild my life from scratch when I do get a place.... it’s a lot. 

I’m putting things up for sale on Craigslist and trying to drive for Lyft whenever I feel like I won’t be too tempted to just floor it and jerk the wheel on the highway, but I’m so terrified. 

If I can come up with the $995+ to pay rent on my own and keep me and my pets alive, I can kick him out. All the furniture is mine, and despite not letting me go out or make friends he has met people he can stay with. 

I still need to figure out how to save money for moving at the same time though, and I just don’t know if I can. But I have less faith in my ability to leave peacefully with him and not want to hurt myself after this. 

I don’t really know how people usually collect donations like this so I made an account on Cashapp and a Youcaring.

Thank you so much for anything you can do. I know a lot of us here are in a similar boat but I have no where else to turn.

[anathemanonymous]

Spilling it in the first person: truths I need to accept

Well, it's not going well. I feel like I am not moving forward,but backward. I held myself back by trying to do the right thing.

I gave you the whole house in trade for my freedom. There was no end date on the agreement. It simply stated you would get the property and all the responsibility of the associated bills. It also stated you would agree to hold me harmless.

Well, that didnt happen.

I'm still stuck 4 years after leaving. The attorney told me not to pay off the foreclosure but I did. Twice. I stopped the process of filing contempt in August. She was livid. She offered me the option to have you removed from the house and I could keep it. Well, I had just signed the apt lease. A one year contract. How was I supposed to afford two house payments? I didn't want that responsibility. I left the house to prove I wasnt married to this man for the money. He refused to leave. So I did.

Both our names remain on the title. Bank cant take me off. You refuse to sell. You cannot afford to refinance.

What are you trying to do here?

As I am being held in place by obligation you insist upon complaining about how it is my fault that you are suffering. How you are refusing to cooperate. Refuse to work or pay bills. Refuse to accept that I left. Refuse to reach out or grow in healthy ways. Refuse to stop drinking or doing drugs. Refuse to try to improve our shitty relationship. Refuse to reach out to your own child. Refuse to sell the house. Refuse to clean it. Trick me into calling off the attorney at the last foreclosure: you say you will pay me back the $5500 and we can fix up the house. I tell you how uneasy I feel about this deal. You tell me to trust you.

I clean and clean on my days off work and you sit and ridicule and drink. You tell me it's no rush. You literally have no money to fix it up. I have gone round and around with Fred at the agency to get him to agree to put the house on the market and how we need to sell to a qualified buyer. How to ensure no consequences from this home being doomed. How to do the right thing. How to honor the promises to the agency and to the bank. Its ridiculous how often I've triaged with your mother. How many phone calls and notes kept on the research of creating a plan to salvage the property and you.

And you. I have given you money. I have paid your debts. I have taken you to the doctor. I set you up for evaluation of ADHD. You cry about your health. You cant get off the couch. You cry about being broke, depressed with no reason to live. When I speak to you, you continue to put me down, to accuse me of never caring. You accuse me of malicious crimes against you for the past 16 years. You claim I just used you. My entire life was built around supporting you. You accuse me of going against you deliberately. You blame for your behaviors of rude comments and refusals to cooperate or participate in anything related to parenting or household chores or budgeting or my feelings. I was threatened by your recklessness. I was doomed to being overly responsible but got nothing but contempt in return.

There wasn't peace. There wasnt love. No support. Constant arguments and blow ups. Constant strife. Constant pain. Carrying your weight twice my size. Trying to rape me. Trying to negate me. Trying to minimize me. Criticizing every fucking thing I did or said or believed. Faking it in front of your friends and parents. Giving nothing but expecting me to provide for your every need on a whim. Needing help with your business books, spending hours only to be discredited and rejected. You put your shit first. You blocked my path with your messiness. You left it all up to me but gave me no credit, no control and no power. Then accuse me of doing the same to you. You ridiculed my hobbies, my goals, my dreams. You chose your friends over me. You drank to the point of black out every day. You stopped working. Your buisness partner abandoned you even after he stole from the business account, you kept him around. You kept giving him your share of our household bills instead of pay our bills. So I paid. You stole my tax returns for years. You were rude and inconsiderate toward how any of your shitty choices affected me and our family. You have withheld love and given only pain. You ignored my feelings and needs. And now you complain and claim to suffer worse than me?

What about me??

To top it off: after moving out and returning on a regular basis to check in with you even as you deliberately were harming me financially and emotionally...I get hate when I remove the loaded guns in the house bc you're suicidal from all the drugs and no sleep and not eating and not working and I worry and I feel sorry and I want to keep things normal so I see the mess and try not to do the cleaning, the yardwork.

I play with the dogs and feed them and you always leave when I arrive ...or start an argument until you chase me away.

After 4 years of being ridiculed and blamed....instead of being heard and validated.

I have to actually accept that you are openly and intentionally holding me hostage financially and emotionally. You admit it on text. Your mother claims you were just drinking and you didnt mean it. What will it take to justify my actions?

Its been 4 years of waiting on pins and needles. Of not breathing. Or being stuck. Not to mention the 7 years before I left the house. Trying to fix things.

Looking back, I've never received emotional support from you. Other than to stay away from my family.

I have a hard time accepting the fact that you didn't improve yourself when I left. You got worse. You stopped trying long before I left. And I hoped you would recognize how awful you'd become. I was risking a chance that you would change into a responsible adult. Learn to care for me in real ways. Appreciate me, quite frankly. I was looking for appreciation. Recognition. Acceptance. Acknowledgement. The elements of love.

I left because there was no love.

It was the right thing to do.

Unhealthy relationships are meant to fall apart.

Blame me or blame you. It doesn't matter. It takes two to have a relationship. It becomes one sided.

Wait. It was always one sided. I wanted to believe it was a mutual relationship. I dreamed it. I created the illusion of it. But it could not be felt. Bc it was a mirage. It only looked like something real. It felt empty. Like a shell. Like a home without a foundation. Ready to fall apart like a Hollywood studio prop.

I was lying to myself the whole time.

The only way out now is to tell the truth. To let shit fall apart by not adding to it. To stop putting in.

But it feels wrong to let my house go into foreclosure. It feels wrong to file with a lawyer. It feels so wrong to do nothing to help, on purpose. Yet it is the right way. Right? This world is absolutely ridiculous. Just fucking back breaking and disheartening. People are so viscous. Banks and lawyers. Without hearts. Empty motherfucking shells of humans.

I knew the truth but didn't want to face it. Denial is so powerful. It can change the way you see things. Or exclude what you do not want to see. Or feel.

I wanted to believe love could make my dream come true, become real. Make me real.

All the proof was in your actions. Fighting me every step of the way. Calling me crazy. You're right. It is crazy to live that way. I agree.

So if it's TRUE : then I have to accept the reality that you don't care about me. Either you cant, or you are just unwilling. You say you love me. But what does love mean? It seems you only care that I care for you. How much I can give and prove that I care. Prove by sacrificing my needs, time, money, energy.

Every fiber of my being is going against the fact that the only way out of this situation is divorce and foreclosure of my home. Abandoning you. Why does it feel unethical and immoral? Huge conflict within.

I tried to help you and to salvage my credit, I have spent over $15,000 to bail it out . ..because I'd already put so much into it that I want to keep on the same path. I dont want a different anonymous path. I want to stay where its familiar. But then again, why? I've never been happy on this path. From experience, moving on does not guarantee happiness either.

I'm standing my ground. I'm honoring my values of integrity and refusing to tolerate abuse and nonsense.

But yes it's hard to move on bc I am ever-wanting to keep convincing myself and the world ...proof of how mature and dedicated I am, of my own goodness, my own kindness, my own value.

If my value rests on a successful career in marriage then I have discredited myself. I have failed to be a quality product. Yikes.

..because I hid behind it, and I'd do anything to keep up the facade. I am afraid to be seen as alone, maybe. I am afraid to stand up against the abuse bc it means I have failed. That I am faulty. Not worthy. Maybe I asked for it. Or deserve it.

Shame is a terrible feeling.

By the virtue of which I choose to honor, I thereby become less valuable. I protected your reputation. I kept silent. I protected my own reputation as well. Now I am throwing it out the window. Breaking a promise to myself to never do that again. Yes, I have experienced this all before. Many times. Throughout my lifetime. I had to destroy my own identity.

Because I could pretend I belonged. I could pretend I had a healthy relationship and family. But the sacrifice was too much. And I was so off-balance. I was shut off. Closed down. Depressed. Sick.

You refused to lie for me. So I left. We dont have to keep pretending to play house. Maybe that disappointed me. You want to play cops and robbers. I refused. Lol. Whatever.

And maybe the ultimate cage I try to break free from is being forced to stay small, a repeating pattern from throughout my entire childhood. It is the shame I carry. The unworthy nature of my wounded inner child.

When confronted with opening up I remain skeptical and scared. I beat myself up. I feel rejected, disillusioned, hurt, betrayed, and I am ashamed of showing that I am being harmed. I am am afraid to speak up. When I do, I get shut down by you, your family, my attorney, the court, society.

This triple whammy has knocked me off my feet every time I try to stand up. I feel insulted by the slights of neighbors, the sounds of the outside world. I speak up against emotional manipulation and I feel the feather of rejection like a sledgehammer.

... I am accused of being crazy. I post on social media. I get very little support. The message I'm receiving is: your perception is inaccurate, we all have a human right to happiness and respect but you should be ashamed of exposing yourself like that. It makes you look vulnerable, it tarnishes our code of taboo subjects, think about your reputation, bc we as a society are not comfortable with displays of vulnerability. Call a hotline or something.

You know what? I dont need a fucking hotline. My counselor didnt even recognize me during our last phone session. Fuck this system. I'm on my own. And if I have to become more viscous and bitter to fit in, I prefer to stand alone.

[nyfacurrent]

COVID-19 | A Tenant’s Guide into the Unknown

What you need to understand eviction, rent, and contracts in this time of uncertainty, courtesy of Tin-Fu (Tiffany) Tsai, Esq.

In response to the COVID-19 crisis, New York Foundation for the Arts (NYFA) and the Pro Bono Steering Committee of New York State Bar Association’s Entertainment, Arts and Sports Law Section (EASL) are collaborating to offer a series of free online workshops to support creative communities. This post draws insights from a webinar led by Tin-Fu (Tiffany) Tsai, Esq., Co-Chair of EASL’s Pro Bono Steering Committee, that addressed questions including: Can my landlord evict me? Do I need to pay rent? and What strategies can I use when negotiating with my landlord?

Please note that this article is a guide, and is for general informational purposes only. It does not provide any specific legal advice nor create an attorney-client relationship.

When Negotiating with Your Landlord

Before speaking, prepare and read the fine print.

Talk to your landlord early. Don’t just wait for them to reach out. Landlords will always prefer to keep a good tenant, so work with them.

Be creative: think and speak long-term when considering your options. Offer whatever you can, considering rent forbearance, rent reductions, and rent deferments as potential tools. You could offer to extend your lease to account for money lost during reduced or deferred rent.

Put the agreement in writing, for future reference and for the purpose of evidence if needed. 

What follows is what you need to know specifically about eviction, rent, and contracts in order to have these conversations.

What You Need to Know: Eviction

If you have a lease, you can only be evicted if your lease is up, you owe rent, or you have seriously violated your lease. Your landlord cannot evict you without advance notice, which is 30 to 90 days based on the length of your lease term if the lease is up or 14 days for owed rent. 

The landlord cannot evict you without going to the court first, which requires them to file a petition to start the court proceeding. The tenant has the right to ask the court to postpone the case for at least 14 days if they are not ready for it.

After the landlord gets a judgment, the landlord must give the Court Clerk a warrant of eviction. After the warrant of eviction is signed, the landlord needs to hire a Marshal, Sheriff, or Constable to take steps to evict the tenant. They will give you at least 14 more days to move. Moreover, the eviction must take place on a business day, during the day. One way to stop the eviction is by paying the full amount of rent due to the court before the eviction is executed.

In New York State, Governor’s Order No. 202.8 instituted a 90-day eviction moratorium. Courts stop accepting eviction filings but continue to address essential cases. Marshals/Sheriffs may not evict until further notice. Note that the stay was extended for another 60 days through mid-August and banned late fees for missed payments during the moratorium.

On the federal level, the Coronavirus Aid, Relief, and Economic Security (CARES) Act imposes a 120-day moratorium on eviction filings and charging fees for non-payment of rent for most of the affordable housing properties. The landlord may not ask a tenant to vacate for any reason without a 30-day notice, which cannot be issued during the 120-day period.

Properties covered under the CARES Act include those participating in the federal assistant program or subject to federally backed mortgage loans. Check your lease documents to see if this includes your property.

What You Need to Know: Rent

Do I have to pay rent right now? The short answer is yes: the eviction moratoria do not excuse tenants’ duty to pay rent. After it ends, tenants who do not pay may still face financial and legal liabilities.

So far, Governor Cuomo’s actions suggest that he feels the eviction moratorium is sufficient in and of itself. There remain proposed rent cancellations such as the below, but none have been passed yet.

New York State Senate Bill 8125A, which was introduced on March 23, 2020, proposes cancellation of rents for 90 days for individuals and small businesses

The Rent and Mortgage Cancellation Act, which was introduced on April 17, 2020, proposes a nationwide cancellation of rents from March 13, 2020 and would last for a year. This is only for primary residences, no double-dipping on multiple properties. 

Rent Freeze

New York City also provides rent freeze programs for seniors and tenants with disabilities who qualify to have the rent frozen at the current level and be exempt from future rent increases. All details on rent freeze are available on the Department of Finance’s site.

For market-rate tenants, landlords can ask tenants to pay more but should give up to 90 days notice if rent increases over 5%. 

Late Fees

A rent payment is late only when received more than five days after it is due, and the landlord must provide written notice for late fees.

The amount of late fees is limited to $50 or 5% of the monthly rent, whichever is less. People who live in properties covered by the CARES Act cannot be charged late fees for 120 days starting from March 27, 2020. 

What You Need to Know: Contracts

Force Majeure

A force majeure is an event that prevents someone from doing something that they agreed to do. This can include acts of nature, acts of man, and anything unforeseen, and is a contractual provision that is interpreted narrowly by New York courts.

Whether COVID-19 qualifies as a force majeure event is case-by-case and depends on the terms of your contract, and it must be proven that failure to perform is specifically caused by the pandemic.

Impossibility

Impossibility is a common law defense that applies to an unforeseeable non-performance of a contract, and means that something is objectively impossible. For example, if one’s lease for a building where a business operates demanded that they operate continuously, the mandated shutdown of businesses would make COVID-19 a trigger of impossibility in court. 

Economic hardship is usually not enough by itself to invoke the doctrine of impossibility. 

Constructive Eviction

Constructive Eviction is when a landlord doesn’t physically evict a tenant but takes action that substantially interferes with the tenant’s use and enjoyment of the premises. For example: failure to provide heat in the wintertime or barring tenants from the premises. 

Most leases include provisions that require tenants to pay rent even when the landlord isn’t providing certain services. In order to prove that constructive eviction has taken place, tenants need to demonstrate a wrongful act on the landlord’s part. 

About Tin-Fu (Tiffany) Tsai, Esq

Tsai has in-house and law firm experience both in the U.S. and Taiwan. Currently, she leads the legal department of Arris Properties Group LLC, a New York-based real estate development company, and advises on various transactional and litigation matters. A Co-Chair of the Entertainment, Arts and Sports Law (EASL) Section of the New York State Bar Association, Tsai is excited to combine her passions in art and law by helping professionals in the creative world navigate legal issues and use regulations to their advantage.

- Recap Authored by Kyle Lopez, REDC Fellow

This program was presented by NYFA Learning. Sign up here to receive NYFA News, a bi-weekly organizational email for upcoming awards, resources, and professional development. NYFA Learning also offers the monthly Con Edison Immigrant Artist Program (IAP) Newsletter if you are interested in opportunities, professional development, events, and tips and advice specific to immigrant artists.

If you need resources, please check our Emergency Grants page on NYFA’s website. We are updating it regularly as new funding comes in. You can find more articles on arts career topics by visiting the Business of Art section of NYFA.org.

Image: Rachel Granofsky (Fellow in Photography ’19), Reno (Guts), 2016, pigment print and painted wood frame

[plinys]

update on my living situation / the ongoing help jess survive

in light of the last post i reblogged and a few asks i got regarding my situation during the past few days after i got those hateful anons, i wanted to give you all a updated post

(if you’re looking for the link to send support just click here)

and remember if you do chose to send support anything else, even the smallest of things means the world and that’s one day further that i’m living

no help is too small

short story: 

following a year of working well below living wage, and barely being able to survive, my program ended on june 16th and despite applying for an absurd amount of jobs have not been able to get anything since then

my lease is over for my apartment at the end of july. i currently cannot afford to pay for a security deposit on a new place, which means i will most certainly be homeless again by this time next month

due to being jobless my foot stamps were dramatically cut this month making the struggle to eat even more impossible, and giving me around $2 a day to feed myself on

without help i will physically not be able to survive at this point

and with that note, onto the “long story” updated life situation:

as you all, a year ago, i left an abusive situation and due to this ended up homeless for a month and it a lot of debt to eventually get myself to a safe space and get my life in order, i had been able to do this by taking a job with a non profit organization (and do the the generous support i received from you guys via my donate button during that period of my life) however this non profit job made me a living stipend so low that i could not make it through the year had it not been for doing sex work with my few remaining non work hours

thanks to a lot of support i was able to quit that point of my life and get clean in april and have by some miracle made it to june which is now when things are getting bad again

my program ended on june 16th and my last paycheck from that came in a lot smaller than expected. despite applying for an absurd amount of jobs i have not  been able to get anything 

those that i have heard back from with even the slightest indication that after a few interviews i could move forward, are at schools and thus places that would not have me start working until the end of august (which while it would be wonderful to get one of those jobs, i will run out of funds before then)

to make matters worse my food stamps have been cut, i am going from getting about $130 a month for food to getting $80 which, is about $2.67 a day for food. 

my lease is over for my apartment at the end of july. i currently cannot afford to pay for a security deposit on a new place, which means i will most certainly be homeless again by this time next month

the alternative at that point is go back into a physically abusive situation or live in my car/a camp ground again which if you were around for that last year it was terrible

i would rather die than be homeless again 

things have been stuck at rock bottom and while i am hoping for good news (two jobs are supposed to get back to me by the end of the week) i am not sure what to do, at this point im not sure if i can do anything

the only reason i made it this far was by the support of all of you, and i want to keep surviving but i cannot do that without help or without a miracle

so i am once again asking for help

any help would be appreciated 

(and believe me, i understand that this is not for everyone, that some people are going to look at this and unfollow me or think poorly of me. and i respect that. thats why i put most of this under a cut.)

thank you all for being patient with me in the meantime

thank you

[whatyouwanted-whatyougot]

I’ve been kinda quiet lately.

Partly because I don’t know what to think or say, and partly because most of you are probably thinking that I brought this on myself. Which perhaps I did, in a way.

Anyway, I’m gonna take some notes--for myself, really--so it’s after the jump.

We went to the therapist on Wednesday afternoon. It took me about 75 minutes to get from work to her office, which didn’t improve my outlook. That said, as therapy goes, it was okay.  I mean, horrible, given the reason, but she was smart and fair and I didn’t leave a gibbering, tear- and snot-soaked mess. I have agreed to see her once alone, and then D will see her once alone, and then we will go together again. And then I think I will be done.

The good news, to the degree that there was any, was that the session revealed that we more or less agree on what happened, and when, and how. There weren’t any major “WTF?” moments, until he decided that what he needs most is to be in the same city as his gf, and that he wants me to accept the position of First Runner Up, so to speak, in case Miss Universe is for any reason incapable of fulfilling her duties.

The bad news is that that things have been pretty fucking awful, as you might guess. Sometimes talking, mostly not. I’ve tried not to be around much when he is.  Most recently, I asked him when he thought he might be going to Chicago.  He said “this summer.”  When pressed, “probably July or August.” That’s four or five months from now; I asked him why the wait, if the need to be there was so great? “I have responsibilities,” he said. He meant work, and his animation group. 

I asked him if he realized that his timeline means that he’s expecting me to facilitate this process and make it as easy for him to leave as possible. I don’t think he realized it before. He offered to find a sublet somewhere. I noted that I, too, will need to find a new place to live, as I cannot afford this apartment on my own--well, I could, but it would mean major not-great-bob changes--and that I need to know as soon as possible what to expect, so I can make whatever arrangements are necessary. I noted that we haven’t renewed the lease on the apartment (which we moved into almost exactly two years ago, on March 21, so the landlord should have brought it up already and hasn’t), and that if Landlord does bring it up, we need to have decided what to do.

He then said that gf, who had previously considered moving to NYC, then reneged on it, has apparently put that back on the table. Why? I don’t know. I don’t think it matters, though. Whether or not he moves or she does, I think he’s broken us. And I don’t think he realizes it quite yet.

[blessed-but-distressed]

Harsh Realms

A/N: This is it. This is the end. It’s been a long time coming. I really enjoyed writing this story, and I’m glad it found an appreciative audience in many of you. Thank you.

also on ff.net

Chapter Twenty Two: Love In A Cold Climate

Emma Swan had gotten some pretty crappy letters in her time.

There was the time an aggrieved reader had sent her an envelope at the Sentinel, stuffed with a suspicious white power. That one had necessitated a shutdown of the entire building by counter-terrorism, and a pretty invasive physical exam from CDC officials in HAZMAT suits. Baking soda, as it turned out.

Or even just the post-it note she’d found stuck to the side of the refrigerator two days after Christmas, informing her that August had drank the last of the milk, and could she please go the store for some more, as he was in the middle of a pivotal scene in his novel and didn’t want to interrupt his flow?

But the email she received in her inbox on January the 10th? That one left her reeling.

“Emma?”

She shut her laptop lid immediately, looking up to find her ne'er-do-well brother lingering by her bedroom doorway, looking all kinds of suspicious. “Uh, creeper much? It’s called knocking. You should try it.”

“I did knock. Twice. I’ve been very good with the knocking ever since the incident with the shower and the thing we agreed to never, ever talk about again.”

Emma could feel the blush creeping up her cheeks at the reminder. Let it be said, sharing an apartment with your boyfriend and your brother? Kinda awkward. Especially when said brother didn’t tend to announce himself before entering rooms that were otherwise… occupied.

“You wanted to talk?” Emma asked quickly, tossing her laptop aside to give August her full attention.

But for some reason he didn’t take her up on her unspoken invitation, continuing to dither in the hallway, hands buried in his pockets and eyes lowered to the floor.

“What is it?” Emma asked, narrowing her eyes. “Did you break the toaster again?

“Toaster is fine. I uh… can I sit?”

Jesus. Maybe he had cancer.

She patted the comforter beside her, and after a moment’s hesitation, the mattress dipped as he settled his weight beside her.

“Is everything alright?” Emma asked, looking him over for obvious signs of ill-health. She thought he looked pale, but it was kinda hard to tell, what with the beard and all.

“I, uh… I got a job.”

Of all the things she had expected him to say, that was not one of the things.

“Oh,” Emma said with a relieved laugh. “That’s great! The way you were acting, I thought you were terminal or something. What’s the job?”

“Assistant editor at a small magazine.”

Emma gave a low whistle. “Wow. Sounds perfect for you. So… why the long face?”

“The job’s in LA.”

A nuclear warhead might have had a softer landing.

“As in Los Angeles, LA?” she asked, her voice rising a few unnecessary octaves.

“That’s the one.” His tone was bright, but when his eyes finally lifted to meet hers, she could see every tumultuous feeling that was currently swimming around in her stomach reflected back at her.

“Oh.”

“Yeah.”

Silence fell between them, the suffocating kind.

“So I guess we’re not renewing our lease, then,” Emma said, a little snippily.

“C'mon, Emma. Did you really want to anyway? I mean, as weird as it is, you and Killian seem to have a pretty good thing going here.”

He got an elbow to the kidneys for that one.

“Yeah, but this was just supposed to be a temporary fix, until you came back and I could afford groceries again. I wasn’t supposed to move in with the guy. We’ve been together for like a minute!”

“Em,” he said, placing a hand on her shoulder. “I know you like to overthink everything, and you’re always the first one to bail when things get too serious, but can we be honest with each other for a sec?”

“Seems like someone already is,” Emma mumbled.

“Emma, you’ve gotta face it: You’ve already moved in with the guy. Hell, you’re practically married.”

“Married?” Emma snorted. “Yeah, no.”

“Oh, really?” August said, one eyebrow raising in challenge. “Exhibit A: Christmas. You fell asleep on the couch together watching It’s A Wonderful Life.”

“I was tired!” Emma protested. “You don’t know how long it takes to decor-”

“Exhibit B!” August interrupted, holding a warning finger up in front of her face. “Breakfast. Every morning he cooks you breakfast, and every morning you two eat off each others’ plates like a pair of gooey-eyed savages.”

“He likes cooking!”

“Which brings us to Exhibit C!” August declared, ignoring her entirely. “You bought booties for his dog.”

“He gets cold!”

“I know it’s scary, Emma. But facts are facts, and the facts are these: You two? Married.”

“Why did I used to like you again?” Emma wondered aloud.

“Don’t get me wrong. This whole thing has mentally scarred me for life. Therapy will be needed. A whole boatload of therapy. But you were right. He’s not the worst guy you’ve ever dated. Not like that furniture guy. What was his name?”

“Walsh,” Emma supplied.

“Yeah, that guy. What a dick. Anyway, where was I going with this?”

Emma listed them off on her fingers. “Therapy? Things seen cannot be unseen?”

“Oh, yes,” August said, hitching himself back onto his train of thought. “Killian. Right. I mean, sure, the cleaning thing is a little weird, but I really am glad he was here for you when I wasn’t. And I’m glad you let him. Kinda surprised, but mostly glad.”

“Well, that’s kind of your fault, isn’t it? I mean, if you’d never wired him that fifty bucks in the first place, I might never even have seen him.”

August blinked. “Fifty bucks?”

“Yeah, the fifty bucks you wired him from Cambodia to come and check on-”. At the blank look on his face, comprehension dawned. “You never wired him money to come check on me, did you?”

August shifted guiltily. “Fraid not.”

“That sneaky son of a bitch!”

“I feel like I might like to recant,” August said, as Emma rose to her feet, fists clenching at her sides. “Is it too late to recant?”

“Yeah. Sorry, I’ve gotta-” She said, indicating towards her door with her thumb.

“Kick ass and take names?” August suggested, seeming more amused by the minute.

She almost made it a step, before pausing. “I’m really proud of you, by the way,” she said, leaning forward to brush a kiss to the top of his head. “And I want to hear all about this new job. Just as soon as I have a little chat with our dear Mr Jones.”

“Married!” August called after her, but Emma was already out the door.

It didn’t take her long to find him. He was exactly where he was supposed to be, homeward bound after a lap around the park, Smee trailing behind in his little sweater and booties. Even from a distance she could see when he spotted her approach, his eyebrows knitting together.

“Swan?” he asked, when she came into speaking range. “Is everything alright? August just sent me seven 911 texts. Is he-”

He didn’t get any further than that. Not when Emma practically leapt into his arms and laid one on him, for God and everyone to see. He stumbled a little as he caught her, his woolen cap falling off onto the sidewalk. Smee’s lead followed close behind, as he responded in kind.

“You’re such a lying liar!” she said, as soon as he put her down some minutes later.

“I’m sorry?” he asked, leaning over to pick it up his hat and the lead.

“You will be sorry in a minute,” Emma said, taking the cap from his hands and beating him lightly around the shoulders with it.

“I’m confused. Are you happy with me or are you angry with me? Because I really can’t tell.”

“I can’t believe-” Whack. “You used-” Whack. “My own superpower against me!”

He had the audacity to be surprised by this news. “I did?”

“You know my superpower only works when I can see you! August wired you fifty bucks, huh?”

At which point the penny finally dropped, and Killian’s look of affronted innocence morphed into something altogether more sheepish. “Ah.”

“Yes, ah,” she repeated. “All of this,” she said, indicating between them with the hat, “based on a lie!”

“A white lie,” Killian amended, grabbing his cap back and pulling it on again. “For the common good, I’m sure you’d agree?”

“I love you.”

It hadn’t been what she’d meant to say. She had been going to say something about badly laid foundations, or some other metaphor about rotten tree roots or something. But at the last second, she’d caught sight of his expression. The soft one that he always had when she was gearing up for a good rant, long-suffering, but fond. And the words had simply… slipped out.

He looked as shell shocked as she did. “I…” His jaw had actually fallen open. Like a cartoon character. He hastily shut it, before clearing his throat. “So, to be clear, you’re… not actually angry with me?”

Emma shook her head, a smile forming on her lips as she took a step closer.

“You’re… in love with me?”

Emma made a non-committal shrug, but when he swayed closer she nodded, her smile growing wider still.

“Bloody hell, you’re impossible,” he said, but it didn’t stop him from snaking an arm around her waist and leaning down for another kiss.

It was Emma who finally broke them apart, her hands against his chest. “So, to be clear, I’m not crazy, right? You’re in this with me?”

“Emma, don’t you know?” he said, leaning closer so that his freezing nose brushed her own. “You’re completely crazy. But I’m kind of hot for that.”

She slapped his chest, but he merely grinned a salacious grin. “Of course I’m in this with you, Swan. I know things haven’t exactly been easy these past few months, but they’ve been a million times better for having you by my side. Even with your, quite frankly, ridiculous ‘no intercourse’ rule-”

Emma placed her hand over his mouth, shooting an apologetic glance at the woman who’d just overtaken them on the sidewalk, looking scandalised.

“Way to go, buddy,” she said, taking him by the hand and leading him back down the block, Smee at his heels. But his answering smile was unrepentant.

“In summary, Emma Swan, I bloody love you. Just so you know!” he called out, so they managed to attract strange looks from a pair of cyclists riding past.

To his surprise, she stopped suddenly, so that he nearly crashed into her. “Nice to hear it,” she said with an uncharacteristic grin, leaning up to press a kiss to his cheek. “Want to hear something else nice?”

“From you, love? Always.”

“August is moving out.” His hand tightened over hers, his smile fading but she shook her head before she continued. “He got a job in LA. A really good job, actually.”

“Swan…”

“I’m fine with it. Really. I think he needs it. A new city. A fresh start.”

“And you are…?” He asked, eyes filled with uncertainty.

“I’m staying here. In the apartment. With you. If… you’ll have me?” She asked, her bottom lip worrying between her teeth as she waited for his response.

What she maybe hadn’t expected was for him to lift her off her feet, his grin broad and boyish as he gazed up into her eyes. “On every available surface.”

“You’re gross,” she chided.

“But you’re kind of hot for that.”

“Shut up and kiss me, Jones, or you’re not getting anything.”

“As you wish.” And he did.

August was packed up and out of the apartment by Thursday, and Emma’s ‘no intercourse’ rule was broken five times before sunrise on Friday, but still there was something nagging at her. Something she still had left to do.

Their latest case was a simple enough one. Another poor chump accused of defrauding his insurance company. Only thing is, Emma was reasonably sure the guy was actually innocent this time around. Even so, they still had to make it look like they’d put the effort in, which meant far too much time spent in hire cars, video camera at the ready, whilst snacking on gummy worms and quizzing each other on clues for the crossword.

Technically speaking, this was not a two person job. But Emma had never been all that great at filing anyway, and diverting calls to her cell phone had hardly been the most arduous task. And the long stretches gave her time to muster the necessary courage to start the conversation she’d been avoiding for days.

“12 Down. Swagger. 5 letters.”

Killian raised an eyebrow from behind his binoculars. “I don’t swagger, Swan.”

She snorted. “Sure you don’t.”

“Nor do I strut.”

She consulted the page in front of her. “Strut. Strut fits!” she said, filling in the boxes. “Alright. Next one.” She scanned the list of clues, her heart leaping into her throat as she read it. “29 Down. To… receive something that is offered.”

“Accept?” Killian suggested, his attention still focused on their mark.

“Too many letters. Killian?”

Something in her tone must have given her away, because he set down the binoculars. “Swan?”

“I… got an email last week. With a job offer. A journalism job offer,” she clarified.

Some kind of noise escaped Killian’s throat, midway between a gasp and a sigh, but he did a good job of swallowing it down. “I had no idea you were still looking,” he said, his voice heartbreakingly even.

“That’s just it!” Emma said. “I wasn’t. I haven’t been. Not for months! But one of my old professors happened to mention my name to someone at the Globe. One of their reporters was snatched up by the New York Times, so now they’re looking for someone to fill the position kind of soon. Someone with experience, someone who’s not afraid to rattle some cages.”

“Sounds rather like you,” he pointed out with a trace of amusement.

“Yeah, but…” Emma indicated around her. “Now I’ve got all this!”

“Emma, love,” he said, reaching over to cup her face, thumb grazing her cheekbone. “Forget all of this for a moment. Do you want this job?”

She leaned into his touch, savoring her last moment of undecided bliss. “Of course I do. It’s a dream job. It’s the fucking Boston Globe! But-”

“Then take it,” he said, leaning forward to press a kiss to her forehead. “29 Down.”

Trust him to be thinking of a crossword in her time of crisis.

“But what about this? Us?”

“Well, I don’t know about you, Swan. But I’d say us is on pretty firm ground. What with you coming home to my bed every night.”

“Our bed,” Emma corrected. “We agreed that the new mattress means it now belongs to both of us. But what about Jones Investigations? I can’t just leave!”

“Love, let’s face it. I can hardly justify paying you as it is. You’re clearly overqualified, and you’ve rarely been called on to actually answer a phone. You’ve been bloody useful on the investigation front, and we make quite the team, but it’s not where your heart truly lies. I know that.”

“But what if you need help?”

“Then I’ll hire a temp. Surely not everyone from the agency is a Machiavellian villain in training?”

“Don’t you even joke.” Emma said, raising a finger in warning.

“Or maybe…” he said, leaning closer still, a rakish grin appearing. “On very special occasions. We could still go on stakeouts together,” he said, the words whispered into her skin.

“You mean, like now?” Emma asked, tilting her head to give him better access to where he was trailing hot kisses down her neck.

“Precisely, Swan. Let’s say we practice.”

“You’re the worst,” Emma moaned, as she tossed the crossword puzzle book into the backseat.

“Aye, darling,” Killian said, with a glint in his eye as he leaned back to remove his shirt. “But you love me for it.”

THE END