#i cannot accept you have access to SIX SEASONS

[shadowsndaisies]

codename: nightingale- auld acquaintances

reference: young justice season 1 episode 26

wc: 10.3k

synopsis: well shit gets real, conner yeets ng and robin, all while, ng reminds us why she’s the best, and the otp(s) get their shit (collectively and respectively) together

main masterlist

codename: nightingale series masterlist

a/n: I CANNOT BELIEVE I DID IT. you guys and your support have carried me though this process and the many YEARS it took me to get to this point. I have loved writing this since the beginning and I still do. Thank you for loving this story and the characters as much as I do. Enjoy!

MOUNT JUSTICE

December 31st, 03:12 EST

The cave was quiet as you zeta’d in. You’d only managed a few hours of sleep before you woke up in a fit. Ollie’s penthouse was silent though. And a quick check through the security system told you no one but you was home, in fact no one had come home, since you had. The team had made the decision to host a debrief at 0730, the next day, allowing everyone (mostly you) to recenter.

Given that the penthouse was empty, you decided to head to the cave early, if you were lucky, you’d be able to check the logs and see if Ollie, Dinah, and Roy were still up in the Watchtower or not.

“Recognized: Nightingale b-14,” the computer’s voice echoed in the darkness of the cave, and a couple of light flickered on in response.

“Computer, pull Zeta logs for the last 24 hours to the Watchtower, Nightingale Access delta echo charlie zero six,” you call out your code after a brief look assures that you’re the only one around.

“Access Denied,” the computer’s response throws you off guard as you pull up a screen, but you’re treated to a red screen.

“Under who’s authority?”

“Designation 0-2.”

“Batman?” you whisper the answer to yourself, but you can’t understand why. You’ve had access to the Watch Tower logs since Ollie and Dinah told you about the tower. You couldn’t get there without them, but you could access the logs to see who’s there currently, and you could usually see the calendar to know when Dinah and Ollie were scheduled.

“Computer, Canary Override: charlie romeo yankee seven eight nine three,” you attempt.

“Override denied.”

“What? Why?”

“Override denied per designation A-0-4.”

“A-0-4? Who is A-0-4?”

“Access Denied.”

“Oh, fuck’s sake!” you shout.

“Perhaps yelling at our computer system is not the best use of your limited time to rest?” a new voice interrupts.

You frown as you turn to look at Kaldur, “it won’t let me access the Watch Tower logs,” you huff, pointing at the red message glaring back at you.

“Why are you looking to access the logs?” he asks, brows furrowed as he looks between you and the screen.

“No one came home last night, K. I needed- I wanted- I just need to talk to Dinah, after everything that happened? I just wanted Dinah or Ollie, and they weren’t home. I passed out on the couch waiting, and when I woke up, they still hadn’t come back. I just wanted to see if they were still there,” you explain.

Kaldur’s lips pull into a frown, “They may be pre-occupied, the League, as you know, better than most, can be demanding, even at the best of times, and with the best of offers,” he states.

“I have no idea what you’re talking about,” you defend, sensing his double meaning.

“You mean to tell me, my King is but a liar?” he challenges.

You’re quiet for a moment, Kaldur knew better than anyone, just how much you respected King Orin, “what did he say, exactly?”

“That you were also accepted into the League, that you were by far the best candidate off all those who were inducted, and yet, you were the only one who has said no to date,” he admits.

Your voice is quiet as you look at your friend, before you sigh, “how long have you known?”

“Since the meeting in November.”

“You didn’t say anything…”

“Neither did you, I decided it’d be best to follow your lead. You would have said something when you were ready to,” he shrugs.

“I’m not ready. I don’t feel ready, to be there, at that level,” you explain.

“You owe me no explanation, old friend. I have always had faith in your decisions, I won’t start questioning them now,” he assures you.

“Thanks, K,” you sigh. “Did he really say I was the best candidate?”

Kaldur smiles knowingly, and gently places a hand on your shoulder, “Come, M’gann stress baked cookies last night upon our arrival. We can indulge in those while we watch something?”

“Yes, please.”

You both got settled on the green sofas with a plate of cookies on the coffee table before you, and two mugs of tea. You were flipping through the available options when Kaldur spoke up again.

“I watched when you were barely in double digits trying to learn how to sort through your feelings and emotions,” he began and your grip on the mug tightened, while your hand with the remote dropped. “I watched as you turned it into a motivator, a strength. I watched how you learned to center yourself and be objective, even with only a decade beneath you. What you feel now, how you feel now, might be stronger, but you know how to utilize that, you know how to sort it. But until you can, until you’re able and ready, I hope you know I will be here to temper it. Just as I was before,” his tone is firm, as he expresses himself.

Slowly your gaze moves to him, and you take him in. This Kaldur was nearly an adult, he had given up the Conservatory, and trained with King Orin. This Kaldur taught you Atlantean, he helped you learn how to open yourself to magic.

“Kaldur…”

“We used to spar, do you remember? You were so full of rage and I remember the Queen sending me to spar with you one day. Garth and Tulla thought it would be unfair, they thought that with my age, my size, my magical and home advantage, you would be unable to compete. Fitting, that you knocked me down in mere minutes, despite being slowed by the water, despite being in a new place, despite your age and size. It was then that we all realized that you hold so much raw power, much more than you ever seemed to realize yourself.”

“You’d think you would’ve learned your lesson after Wally,” you scoff, sniffing to yourself and recalling the first time you met the boys.

“Oh, I did. Which is why I asked for you to be included in our studies, it’s why you studied with me, specifically, at the conservatory. You needed an outlet, then. So, you studied with us, trained with us, and despite not being naturally adept at magic, despite being out of your element, you held your own, you beat us several times. You mastered skills quicker than we ever did. You needed the distraction, to let go of all that you had been forced to carry at such a young age. I just hope you can trust me to help you with that again.”

“You were my first true friend, Kaldur’ahm. I had Roy, but he had always been introduced as a brother, you were a friend. You saw me, the realest version of me, rageful, angry, upset, scared, all of the negative emotions and you still decided that you would help me. You have always looked out for me, and you have always had my trust,” you’re resolute in your answer, no one had supported you through the hard parts like Kaldur had, because he was right. He had seen you at your angriest, he’d watched you fight as an outlet, seen you train yourself to the brink of exhaustion just to be free of the rage, even for a minute, and instead of telling you that you were wrong for your methods, he instead offered you new outlets, new opportunities. He lent you his strength and stability when you had none.

“I am honored to hold that title, my bird. We made a promise, you remember? A piece of our histories intertwined,” he states, smiling at you as he tugs a gold chain from under his shirt. Your gaze lingers on it for a moment before dropping to the ring you’d been subconsciously fidgeting with.

The ring that had allowed you to breathe underwater, the one that allowed you to live in Atlantis as if you were an Atlantean yourself, it was obviously special. But what made it so treasured was not the gift it gave, it was the who the gift was from. The ring had belonged to Kaldur’s mother. It had been she, who when King Orin asked for a volunteer, a home for the girl from the dry world, had stepped forward. She had opened her home, and had offered the ring to be enchanted for you. She became your advocate while you lived in Atlantis, she treated you like you were one of her own. When it was finally time for you to return to your home, over a year later, she had told you to keep the ring, “I’d always hoped to pass this ring to a daughter,” she’d said, and you cried as you hugged her one last time.

On Kaldur’s first trip to visit you, merely a month after you’d gone back to Star City, you’d given him a chain. It had belonged to your father, and he’d worn it his whole life. Something that had been gifted to him when he was young from his father, who got it from his father before him. There’s a small pendent that hangs, your family’s crest, just like on your ring, they were a set technically.

You’d managed to enchant the item with your limited ability just in time for Kaldur’s first visit. “It’s meant to be passed to sons. I’d really like it if our histories were intwined. If I’m going to carry such a meaningful part of yours and your mom’s history, then I’d really like if you were to carry this of mine.” As far as you know, he hadn’t taken it off since you gave it to him almost three years ago.

The frown reappears on your lips as you look at the chain, and then at Kaldur. “Sometimes… I wish I was still there. It was easier living with you. There were no secret machinations, just you and me, and Garth and Tulla. I- I was hurting, I know that, but-”

“I understand,” he promises and you can’t help but let out a watery laugh.

“Of course you do. You’re Kaldur’ahm, no one ever seems to understand me as well as you do,” you smile.

“Rest, my friend, you have earned it. Our debrief with the Batman is 0730, however, I suspect he will be here early.”

“0700?” you ask.

“See you then,” he promises, tossing you a pillow and a blanket.

“Thanks, K, for everything,” you smiled, plopping back.

“Anytime, my friend, anytime.”

MOUNT JUSTICE December 31st, 06:30 EST

When you wake up again, it’s to Conner staring down at you with a quirked brow.

“Shit, Conner, why are you just staring at me like that?” you groan rubbing at your eyes.

“I wasn’t expecting to see you yet,” he admits, one hand rubbing at his neck.

“Yeah, I came earlier this morning. Canary and GA were at the Tower all night long. K, sat with me for a while.”

“Well, since you’re here… maybe we can talk about-”

“About your dad?” you ask, staring up at the roof of the cave.

“Don’t. Please don’t call him that. There's so much to figure out, but he’s not… not my dad,” you haven't turned back to him yet, but you can hear the tension in his tone.

“Genetic Donor then?” you offer turning back to him with a lazy smirk before adjusting yourself to lean against the arm of the sofa, tucking your legs beneath you.

“Genetic Donor works,” he sighs, sitting down in the now empty space on the sofa with you.

It’s silent for a minute as you both process, and then you're giggling. Conner’s eyes blow wide, as he stares at you. You cant help yourself though. Your giggles soon turn to full blown laughs, tears forming in your eyes.

“NG… nightingale… (y/n)!” Conners tone grew increasingly harried with each call to you.

“I’m sorry, I- I just… he killed my parents. I’m an orphan… be-because of Lex fucking Luthor, and he’s the only reason you're even here. He’s the reason I’m here!” you’re still laughing.

It has to be some sort of break, your mind finally deciding it's had enough.

That's when the laughs trail off, and you're left with tears.

You stop heaving and you take a deep breath, everything grows silent, you shut your eyes and center yourself. When you open your eyes you're staring at Conner again.

“I don't know how to fix this,” he admits.

You offer him a weak smile as your shoulders droop, “you can't,” you relent and Conner sags back into the sofa too.

“What now?” he asks.

“We be honest with each other, and the team. You and me, we're bonded by something now. I didn't realize it when we freed you from your pod, or when you helped us escape, but we are.”

“Allies against Lex?” he offers, holding out his hand.

“Allies against Lex,” you confirm, shaking his hand.

A not so innocent piece of you takes advantage and reads his emotions. You're reassured by the feelings of honesty, compassion, and belonging. You stare at Conner for a moment before letting go of his hand.

“What time is it?” you ask, stretching out a bit.

“You have about 15 until debrief.”

“Okay, thanks,” you sigh, standing up.

“I’ll see you in the cortex?” he asks, standing up as well.

“Yeah,” you confirm before heading to the locker room.

You're all standing in a line when Batman finally zetas in. You hadn’t had a chance to talk to Rob, or anyone else from the team about yesterday before he arrived.

He starts by asking for a rundown of events. Which we oblige. We explain everything from start to finish, the reveals, the truths, the plan for Santa Prisca. Everything leading up to the moment of Lex Luthor’s escape.

And when all of that is said and done you swallow your fears down hard before stepping forward, “Additionally, after defeating Bane with Robin and Zatanna, when I became aware of Luthor’s escape-”

“She was a little upset, which I’d argue is completely warranted considering everything we found out yesterday,” Wally cuts in, interrupting you before you can admit to how you lost control.

“Yes, but-” your second attempt is interrupted as well.

“Which is why we would like to request that the development of a case against Luthor be a Team priority,” Robin’s the one to cut in this time, proffering an official request on behalf of the team.

You risk a glance at the Team, and you don’t need M’gann’s abilities to understand what they're trying to say. So you shut up, and step back in line, waiting for Batman’s response to the debrief as well as the request.

He doesn't say anything for a minute, and then Kaldur is stepping in, “We have reason to feel proud of yesterday's victories. But one thing has not changed,” he alludes.

“Somehow, the bad guys are still getting intel about us,” Robin offers.

“Yeah, but at least we know none of us are the mole,” Wally counters.

For the first time that morning Batman finally speaks up, “That's correct,” he confirms, and he does so with serious conviction.

You want to be reassured by his confirmation, but something about the whole briefing was throwing you off, and it wasn't the discussion of Luthor.

“The mole,” he begins again, “was Red Arrow.”

Theres a brief silence as Roy’s image is displayed before everyone explodes.

“Roy?” Robin repeats disbelievingly.

“No way!” Wally’s voice had pitched up in his rebuttal.

You on the other hand, felt as the first of the strings holding you up snapped. Kaldur places a hand on your shoulder as if he knew, before turning back to the Dark Knight, “Batman, that cannot be. He was Green Arrow's protégé. We have all known him for years.”

“Unfortunately, the Roy Harper we have known for the last three years is another Project Cadmus clone,” Red Tornado explains.

You have to fight to catch your breath, this couldn’t be happening. You’d known Roy longer than that, you would've realized!

“We've learned the real Speedy was abducted and replaced soon after becoming Green Arrow's sidekick,” Batman explains and you finally step forward.

“No,” the seriousness of the word echoes in the cave. “I’ve known Roy longer than that, its been way more than three years! I would have noticed if CADMUS had substituted my own brother in front of me!” your argument is urgent, something had to be wrong.

“Unless they took a self fabricated opportunity to substitute the clone in a time of chaos. Where Speedy’s patrol partner and closest confidant was… gone?” Batman paints a picture but you're so hyper-focused on the Roy of it all you miss what he’s hinting to.

Theres a sharp intake of breath behind you, when you turn you see Kaldur, his eyes wide as he stares at you, “You came to Atlantis almost four years ago, you were gone from the surface world for over a year…” he reminds you, and you feel another string snap.

“No.”

“You said everyone seemed different, you were different, you were re-adjusting, it’d be reasonable to assume you wouldn't have noticed,” Kaldur’s tone is soft.

“No! Don't you understand?” you shout, turning to the team. “If that's true, it means the riot where they escaped was planned, they meant to cause a distraction, to throw us off guard so that they could switch-”

“Switch their Roy for ours,” Wally finishes, green eyes full of remorse on your behalf.

“And they waited almost year to put that into action, capitalizing off of the disarray of Star City's heroes,” Artemis tacks on.

“I would have noticed!” you argue, voice cracking as you try to reign in your emotions.

“The clone was pre-programmed with a drive to join the Justice League,” Batman intervenes, continuing to provide the information he had at hand. “Which is why he was so angry over any delays to his admission and why he refused to join the Team. This Roy Harper had no idea he was a clone or a traitor. And his subconscious programming drove him to become League-worthy. So he struck out on his own as Red Arrow.”

Your head was spinning, heart beating so fast and loud in your ears, it was a miracle you were still standing up. Something was wrong, something had to be wrong. Where was Dinah and Ollie? If this were true they’d come to tell you in person, they would. How could Ollie have not noticed? How could Dinah? Something had to be wrong.

“When he was finally admitted, his secondary programming kicked in and he attempted to betray the League to Vandal Savage.”

Your stomach flipped, Savage?

“Fortunately, I had already deduced Red Arrow was a clone. We were prepared.”

He had what?!

“I think I’m gonna be sick,” you whisper, Conner and Kaldur seem to be the the only two who hear you as they offer you mildly concerned expressions.

“Savage was subdued but Red Arrow escaped. He is now a fugitive, armed and dangerous,” Red Tornado continues.

“If you guys hadn't rescued me from CADMUS...” Conner trails off, eyes jumping from me to Kaldur.

“What happened to the real Roy?” Rob’s the one to voice the question and your heart stutters. Real Roy as if the one you'd known since your return wasn't real in some way. They were both real, at least they were to you.

“We don't know. He isn't at Cadmus. We have to face the possibility that the real Roy Harper is dead.”

You can't stop it. The bubble of grief, pain, and guilt. It bursts out of you, and of course Kaldur’s the one to catch it. His hand lands heavily on your shoulder, and you take deep breaths to center yourself. They don't know, you remind yourself. He could be alive and on ice somewhere, you repeat. You're forcing thoughts of hope down your own throat, hoping something will be digestible.

The last thing you're expecting is for Robin to grab ahold of your hand, not in front of Batman, and not after yesterday’s incident. Today, however, he doesn't waver or flinch back like he had the day before, so you can't tell if he can feel what you are right now. He simply snags your hand and tightens his grasp, until you're squeezing back.

“The clone Roy. The Team will find him,” Kaldur decides, his tone leaves little space.

Yet, somehow, Batman blows it wide open, “Negative. Red Arrow's a member of the Justice League now. Leave him to us.”

There's an argument forming on your lips, but a beep from his comms forces you to shut up.

“I'm needed on the Watchtower. Tornado, stay with the kids,” Batman decides and Robins hand slackens a bit. Kids? Since when did Batman call you kids?

The zeta lights up a second later, “Recognized, Batman, zero-two.”

You turn and run to the closest bathroom, you can hear as a few people shout after you, but you’re focused on making it to the bathroom. Your knees hit the ground hard as you all but collapse and then your heaving up the little that’s in your stomach. The protein bar and cookies that Conner had swiped from the kitchen for you, the orange juice Kaldur had poured for you, and the the blueberries that you’d scarfed down as well.

There’s a hand on your back, another keeping your hair back. “Wally?” your voice is a hoarse whisper.

“It’s me,” he affirms.

You nod and close your eyes for a second before you’re heaving again.

“I got you,” he promises, gently rubbing circles into your back.

You knew that, Wally’s always got your back. You know he probably didn’t hesitate to chase after to you, and that he most likely told everyone else to stay back. “I would have noticed,” you repeat.

“(Y/n)…”

“I should have noticed,” you say, sliding back, wiping at your mouth and leaning against the wall before turning to your friend.

“That’s not on you,” Wally argued.

“He’s my brother, my responsibility,” you shoot back.

“C’mon, let’s get you back before Rob starts panicking,” he huffs, pulling you up.

“I need to bru-” before you can finish Wally disappears and reappears with the toothbrush from your locker and a tube of toothpaste.

“Your teeth?” he asks cheekily.

You shake your head before quickly brushing your teeth. When you and Wally get back it’s to Kaldur’s awaiting stare. You offer a nod and he turns to face the rest of the team before looking back at you. He gives you a look signifying that it was your move this time, your call. Your stomach’s still unsettled but you swallow down your nerves and confusion before addressing the team.

  “Clone or no clone, Red Arrow was one of us. For three years, he was ours. We will go after him, and we will figure this out, on our terms,” you decide.

  You had planned to say more, but the sudden sounds from Red Tornado force you to stop. He freezes about a foot and a half away from you. Then, it's like he shut down. A sound as if he was being powered down, as the entire armor freezes, and his head tilts down.

  “Tornado!” M’gann’s shout is slightly panicked.

“What happened?” Conner’s squinting.

“He's powered down,” Wally notes, tone slightly curious.

“All functions off-line,” Robins got a frown as well, analyzing Red Tornadoes stats on his wrist-computer.

“Something doesn’t feel right,” you note, staring between the stats as well as Tornado.

“Guys, I'm sensing a low-level mystic force at play. I don't know if it caused his shutdown, but… now that I think about it, I was getting the same buzz off Batman,” Zatanna admits, and your frown deepens.

“Batman,” Robin repeats. “He called us kids. He never does that.”

  You step forward, analyzing every aspect of Tornado that you could, Wally comes up behind you and does the same.

  “Look,” Wally’s call pulls your attention. When he straightens up you can see something in his hands, “One of those bio-tech chips we confiscated off Cheshire.”

“Nightingale is right, something is not right,” Kaldur agrees. “Robin, Kid, Zatanna, Rocket, see if you can get Tornado back online,” he directs. “The rest with me to find Ro... Red Arrow.”

  The team pauses despite Kaldur’s clear instruction, and slowly they look from him, to each other, and then to you. You know why they paused, even Kaldur seems frozen as he stares at you. His decision would put you into the field, it would allow you to look for Roy, to be there when the Team finds him. Going with them would also separate you from both Wally and Dick.

  You must’ve stayed silent too long, “Birdy,” Wally’s voice seemed to echo as he called out your name.

“Sorry,” you mutter, looking up. “Kaldur’s right, we.. uh, we have to split up.”

  Wally and Dick look at each other and then they look at you.

  “It’ll be okay,” you tell them. “I have to find him, my brother, my responsibility. Plus, who knows him better than me?”

  No one has an answer and you nod.

  “Suit up,” you confirm once more before the team nods, and disperses accordingly.

  Wally, Dick, and Kaldur hang back. The three of them don’t speak, but they’re exchanging looks with each other and with yourself. No one says a word, but you offer a look of your own, and then roll your eyes at them. They pause and as always, Wally’s the first to crack. He throws his hands up looking at the two other boys and then gesturing to you. When that doesn’t get the response he wants, he throws his hands up again, waving them around.

You smile softly, hands coming to Wally’s shoulders. You offer a forced lopsided smile, tilting your head to the side. Wally responds by shaking his head, and you tighten your grip. You give him a pleading look, Wally’s face scrunches but he finally stares at you head on. You nod, gently and he sighs before nodding back.

You pass along a feeling of comfort, trying to make him understand that it’ll be okay.

“Yeah,” Wally confirms, before walking off.

Kaldur offers you a nod of his head and you nod back, before he walks toward the bioship.

You pause for a second and take a breath, and then there’s a hand on your shoulder and you’re hit with concern, longing, and a need to protect. You take another breath and turn to face Dick. He’s staring at you for a second, he opens his mouth and then closes it. In the end he stares at you making a closed fist with his right hand and rubs little clockwise circles on his chest. Your ASL was passable, a skill that Dinah and Ollie thought was important to learn for the streets, it seems like Bruce thought the same for Dick. Sorry, that’s what he was saying.

You know what he’s sorry for, you knew it the second he grabbed your hand. You take your right hand, rub a circle with your palm against your chest, and then with a flat hand swipe above your temple with your fingertips, I know.

He shakes his head, the barest of a smile on his lips.

You offer a soft smile at Dick one last time before walking towards the locker room. You’re quick to grab your gear, and you’re silent until your in the bioship, and in the air.

“Old friend,” Kaldur’s voice is soft inside the bioship, but you’re forced to pay attention to him regardless.

“I know what you’re going to say,” you sigh.

“Oh?”

“It’s not your fault, you couldn’t have known,” you trail off.

“Wrong,” Artemis interrupts.

“Am I?”

“Yeah, we were all going to say it,” Conner scoffed.

You soften at that.

“That’s where you’re wrong,” you say sadly.

“How so?” M’gann’s voice is as soft as it has always been.

“Because I did know, a piece of me did, at least,” you tell them, gaze focusing on the clouds as you pass them by out the window.

“What?” Conner’s accusation cuts clear.

“I knew something was wrong. I could feel it. Ever since my abilities… he would get angry, over things he never used to. I just wrote it off, I- I knew it was wrong, it felt wrong, it didn’t feel like natural anger, it was sudden, it was triggered but not by anything I could see. I should’ve said something, should’ve told someone,” you admit to them.

“You had no reason to suspect ulterior machinations,” Kaldur countered. “And though I know it bothers you, you both had grown apart since the foundation of the team.”

“Yeah,” you nod, fingers tracing over the ring dagger you’d been fidgeting with, “maybe.”

WASHINGTON, D.C. December 31st, 09:06 EST

“Logs indicate Red Arrow zeta'd to the Hall from the Watchtower,” Artemis stated, “But he could be anywhere by now, I also was only able to read the Hall logs, the Watchtower ones have been classified,” she adds on.

Kaldur clears his throat and turns to you expectantly, “So, I kind of didn’t appreciate how Roy tried to cut ties with everyone when he went solo, so I might’ve done some digging…” you trail, typing in new coordinates.

“Digging?” Conner asks.

“Okay, fine, investigating, and tailing, and the whole package pretty much. I found his main apartment, and discovered that he had installed equipment caches in several major cities,” you relent.

Conner coughs out, “stalker,” before clearing his throat, and you roll your eyes.

“One is here,” you continue as the bioship comes to a stop over an apartment complex.

“So… who’s going down, because, uh… not it,” Artemis muses weakly.

“I am,” you assure her.

“We are,” Kaldur corrects.

You nod and you both stand, you readjust your utility belt and pull a sweatshirt over the top of your suit, and then you pull your leather jacket on as well. It looks inconspicuous enough, at least as much as it would ever for your needs.

You and Kaldur drop to the roof, the access door was unlocked and you made your way down one floor. Roy had gotten an apartment on the top floor. When you come upon the door you crouch down with your lock picks, but between your latent anxiety, and the need to find Roy, your focus is slightly skewed.

“Perhaps, this is not the time for stealth?” Kaldur offers sagely.

You sigh and hang your head, hiding your lock pick tools in their place under your sleeve once again, “yeah.”

“Shall I? Or, would you like to?” he asks, gesturing to the door.

“I will,” you nod, standing back up.

You take a breath and stare at the door, and then with a heafty amount of force you kick down the door, you manage to put in enough force to rock the door off a hinge, and when it clears your vision you’re greeted by Roy holding up his bow with two arrows notched.

You notice the way his hand dips a second as he realizes it’s you he’s got an arrow focused on, “How’s it hanging, Roy?” you ask, but there’s a tough edge to your tone.

“You know, business as usual, Birdy,” he huffs out, but he retrains the arrows on you both.

“We have not come to harm nor apprehend you,” Kaldur cuts in. “But the Team requires answers-”

“Me first,” Roy interrupts. “Tell me something you haven’t told anyone else… tell me who broke your heart.”

Your jaw drops, “Roy!” your tone is more chastising than it was before. You know why it’s necessary, but it’s a low blow for Kaldur, a very low blow.

Kaldur places a hand on your shoulder, “Tula. The girl I loved chose my best friend Garth over me,” he answers, and you can hear the fight to keep his voice level. “While the man I consider by best friend on the surface world aims an arrow at my chest.”

Roy moves and suddenly both arrows are pointed at you.

“Roy-” Kaldur’s tone turned dangerous, but to your credit your eyes narrow and you tilt your chin up at him daringly.

“E.T. phone home,” Roy says, and you don’t need to touch Kaldur to feel the confusion rolling off of him.

There’s a pang in your heart, Roy, this Roy, was pulling on one of the earliest decisions you all made, code phrases. Methods to promise sanity, self, but also a warning when necessary. They were all movie phrases, famous enough to remember, but mismatched enough that no one would be able to guess. You’d both decided on them after you’d returned from Atlantis and Dinah let you return to patrol.

“Toto, I’ve got a feeling we’re not in Kansas anymore,” you whisper.

Roy’s entire body sags. The bow and arrows clatter to the floor as he drops to his knees, and you’re quick to drop with him. You land on your knees right in front of him.

“You’re killin’ me, Smalls,” you whisper once again to him.

“As if,” he shoots back, and you crush him in a hug.

The both of you clutch onto each other, you grip him tight just for the minute being. You hug him tight and he hugs back, and you revel in it. In it’s familiarity. He might have not been the Roy that was brought home to you, but he is the one you spent the last three years with, he is still your Roy. The one who helped you readjust to being back in Star City, the one who would drive you to school, and would tap you gently when you’d accidentally slip back into Atlantean. The one who would reassure you that life was going to be okay, who would sit beside your bed, who would hold your hand, who watched your back, he was your brother. Your brother, your responsibility.

Slowly you both re-centered, and then you hauled him up to the roof, and then all three of you were pulled back up into the bioship. It’s quiet when you’re all back.

“We’re clear,” you say quietly and there’s a collective breath let out.

Everyone settled into their seats and soon enough we were back in the air.

Kaldur doesn’t waste any time, “We were told you were the mole,” he explains and Roy puffs out a breath.

“But we have reason to doubt,” you quickly inserted.

“Forget doubt. I was the mole,” Roy states, and you let out an audible groan, staring up at the roof of the ship.

“Batman and Tornado said you’re a CADMUS clone, like me,” Conner admits.

Roy turns to look at you, and you offer a slight nod, “That explains it,” he nods with a sigh that makes him seem more tired than surprised. “I was a sleeper agent, pre-programmed to infiltrate the League…. I think Sportsmaster was my handler. He had a key-phrase, Broken Arrow… that could shut me down, put me in a hypnotic state to steal secrets for his superiors, or incorporate further programming. I'd then carry out all orders subconsciously completely unaware of what drove me.”

Roy paused and you stared back at him, “take me back?” you whisper to him and he shut his eyes and nodded once more before turning back to the rest of the team, specifically the three seated behind you.

“I think one of those orders was to focus suspicion on the three of you. I'm sorry,” he adds on.

“How did Batman discover this and prevent you from betraying the League?” Kaldur asks.

Roy pauses, and looks at you, “He didn't.”

“Fuck,” you sigh.

“Birdy,” Kaldur’s voice is level, and there’s a request in it to make sure you remain so as well.

“So what happened?” you ask, pulling yourself together.

“The entire League’s been put under mental domination via those chips you guys found,” Roy sighs, scrubbing at his face.

“The ones we got off Jade?” Artemis cut in.

“Yeah, he called ‘em Starro-tech, an alien bio-organism infused with nanotechnology and magic,” Roy explained.

“Nanotechnology and magic?” you repeat. “Artemis, in the Bayou, you said you saw-”

“Klarion, the Brain, Gorilla Mallah, and Professor Ivo,” she answers.

“If there was ever a trust that could pull something like that off…” you trail.

“What do they do? The chips?

“It shuts down the mind’s autonomy, allows the controller to reprogram the individual to suit their needs,” Roy explains.

“Wait…” Conner calls interrupting. “You said He called them, who’s he?”

Roy grimaces, looks around the ship and then straight at you, and you already don’t like where this is headed, “Savage,” he says and you don’t even make it a second before you explode.

“Are you fucking kidding me?” you shout. “VANDAL SAVAGE? WHAT THE FUCK!”

“Language,” Roy says automatically, and then he twitches, like he hadn’t meant to say it. “And I knew you weren’t going to like that.”

“But this chip, it affected everyone?” M’gann asked, and you had no doubt she was thinking about her uncle.

“This Starro-tech, it worked on super-powered humans, four flavors of alien, an android, even Doctor Fate,” Roy explained.

“Defeating all of you without a fight?” Conner asks.

“Indeed. A remarkable achievement. One not easily countered,” Kaldur points out.

“I'm sorry, but how is it that you are no longer enslaved?” M’gann’s the one to ask and your body tenses up.

“No Starro-tech, for starters. Just my CADMUS programming, and once I had satisfied its last parameter, my mind began to clear,” Roy admits. “I'm sure Savage planned to Starro-tech me, but he paused to bask… I escaped.”

You turn in your seat and look back at M’gann, urging her to understand, and luckily, she does. She nods at you with a gentle smile, “I promise, I can clean any residual programming from your mind,” M’gann says, reassuring you, despite the intention being directed at Roy.

  “Linking both squads and de-camouflaging,” M’gann’s voice suddenly echoes in your head and you spot the super cycle as it moves into docking position.

“Great. Because we really need to compare notes,” Robin’s voice has an edge, and as you come face to face with him and the other half of your team, you spot Wally’s frown and notice Dinah.

“What the fuck?” your voice takes on it’s own lethal edge as your gaze jumps from your unconscious and tied up mentor to the rest of the team.

It took some time but eventually both halves of the team had been caught up, now the only think left was to figure out the next move.

  “What if we reverse engineer the starro-tech?” Wally’s the one to make the suggestion and it has all of you pausing.

“Great idea, but how?” Artemis’ tone is dry but she makes a valid point.

  It goes quiet and that’s when you have an idea.

  “ti tha ginótan an rotoúsame ti vasílissa?" (what if we were to ask the queen?) the question echoes across the link but only one person can understand.

Kaldur blinks slowly and in a hesitant tone asks, “*Rota tin gia ti akrivos?*" (ask her for what exactly?)

Your lip quirks a bit, “*an boroúme dioikitís Giatrós V?*" (if we can commandeer Doctor V?)

You’re not sure what you were expecting but you’re not sure why you were surprised, Kaldur’s always backed your plans, “Pistévete óti o Red échei akóma ton arithmó tis Roquette?" (Do you think Red still has Roquette’s number?)

You offer a lopsided smile, “**Tha chreiastoúme óli ti voítheia pou boroúme na pároume**." (We’re gonna need all the help we can get.)

“Would someone like to clue those of us not fluent in Atlantean in?” Conner’s tone cuts through your conversation.

  You share another look with Kaldur.

  “It’s your plan,” he prods.

“Wally has the right idea, we have to reverse engineer the chip. We don’t stand a chance if we don’t,” you remind everyone.

“But you have a plan that will address that,” Robin realizes.

“Of course she does, when it comes down to it, our girl’s always got a plan,” Wally snorts, but by the way he scrubs at his face you realize he’s on edge.

You nod, “what do we know about the staro-tech?”

“Alien bio-organisim infused with nanotechnology and magic… what are you thinking?” Roy trails.

“I think you have the number for a nanotechnologies expert who owes us a favor, and I happen to know a few individuals who specialize in magic and science, in fact they run a whole conservatory, that teaches kids like us, well, like Kaldur,” you hint to everyone else.

“Doctor Roquette and Queen Meera,” Robin realizes.

“Alongside Doctor Vulko, who runs the Atlantean Science Center, he’s the Minister of Science for the kingdom,” Kaldur adds.

“Doctor Spence too,” Connor adds, “She worked for CADMUS, she probably can help reverse engineer the chips.”

“Which means there’s also three people we need to pick up, ASAP,” you point out.

  Another silence fils the ship, Wally’s already shaking his head, and Rob’s still staring straight at you.

  “We have to split up,” Rocket’s the one to state the obvious.

“Again?” Zatanna’s voice wobbles a bit.

  You bite down hard on your lip to keep yourself focused.

  “We have to, the quicker we get them, the quicker we fix this. We have to fix this,” you say, voice level.

“How do you want to handle it?” Robin’s the one to ask, his own voice level, but you can see the twitch in his hand.

Your lips tug down as you prepare to answer, because there’s only one possibility, “Superboy and Miss Martian will pick up Dr. Spence. Kid Flash and Robin will escort Red Arrow-” you don’t mean for your voice to crack but it does. “Will escort Red Arrow and retrieve Dr. Roquette.”

“You’ve got to be joking,” Wally’s scoff, clearly depicts what he thinks of your decision.

“Dude,” Robin’s quick to cut him off.

“And Aqualad and I will take the super cycle to go to Atlantis,” you finish. “Artemis, Zee, and Rocket will play support, and keep tabs on Canary. Please do not lose my mentor. Plus they can run background with RT.”

  You’re met with silence.

  “This is the plan, if someone has a better idea, speak up now, otherwise, you know what you have to do,” you swallow back the anxiety, and focus your gaze on Kaldur, you can’t look at anyone else, not right now.

  You remember his words from earlier, to lean on him, and to allow him to support you. It was all so overwhelming, it’s all too much, but staring at Kaldur reminded you of the little girl who was barely 10 when she was dropped in Atlantis. The girl so full of rage she couldn’t sort through her own emotions. Kaldur knew how to help that girl center herself, taught her how to cope and handle things.

  “Well if no one else is going to say it; I have some thoughts,” Wally scoffs again.

“Trust me, we know you do, Wall-Man,” Artemis’ dry tone actually puts a smile on your lips, a small quirk of a thing, but it works.

“I’m only taking constructive criticism at the moment,” you tag on, and your gaze finally flickers to Wally who is simply glaring at you.

  You offer a shrug in response, and you can feel the heat of Wally’s glare, the discomfort radiating off of Dick, but you don’t have it in you right now to address it.

ATLANTIS December 31st, 13:13 EST

“Our friends are… displeased,” Kaldur notes cautiously once it’s just the two of you on the supercycle.

“I know,” you nod, and you did, you felt it in the air, rolling off your teammates, your friends, as you and Kaldur geared up to split off.

“What are you thinking, poulí?” the question weighs heavy on you.

“I am thinking that this is my only plan, K. I don’t have a back up if we should fail this time around,” you admit.

“Then it’s good we trust in your planning, old friend. Your plans have never led us astray thus far,” he muses.

“Define astray,” you scoff back, Kaldur lets a smile slip, and then a hand lands on your shoulder comfortingly.

“They believe in you, and so do I,” he reassures you. “This idea, utilizing our resources, it is a good plan.”

“Vandal Savage, Kaldur, it’s a big play we’re chancing at here,” you sigh, twisting your rings nervously.

“Yes, and we are making the most educated choices we can. Believe in yourself, poulí, just as we do.”

You nod silently doing your best to absorb Kaldur’s reassurances. Soon enough the Super-cycle begins to descend. It pauses part way submerged, and you reach out with the ring clad finger to touch the water. Kaldur is silent beside you as you ground yourself. You feel the current, the pull of the ocean, and firmly you say, “anapnéo,” the ring made from atlantean metal glows, and then with a tap to the Super-cycle it submerges completely.

The first breath is always a bit nerve wracking, it feels like you’re entirely out of practice, and therefore not prepared to breathe. But you do. You cautiously, slowly breathe in, and when it feels as normal as it does on land your body relaxes.

“pos niótheis poulí?" (how do you feel, Birdy?) Kaldur’s question jars your wandering thoughts back into the present.

“étoimo na cheiristeí ó,ti prépei na cheiristeí ,” (ready to handle what needs to be handled) you assure him and he nods.

Minutes pass and then you are confronted with the city of Atlantis, beautiful in all its glowing magic and technology. You smile at the city fondly and catch the wanting in Kaldur’s eye, this was him home, and for a year it had been your own. The two of you had developed your friendship in this city, it will always, without a doubt, be a very special place for you.

As the cycle passes through the gates and toward the conservatory, you push the melancholic nostalgia away, and do your best to focus in on the mission at hand, there was too much as stake to be distracted by memories of the past. As Kaldur disembarks, you follow, and the two of you make your way into the Conservatory of Magic.

MOUNT JUSTICE

December 31st, 15:42 EST

“So you need us to develop something that will work against, whatever magicked up alien technology that Mr. Big Bad, Vandal Savage is using against the Justice League?” Roquette’s tone was the same as it was when you first encountered her, and you share a look with Kaldur when you both notice it.

“The heroes have come to us for help, should we not so long as we are able?” Dr. Vulko, ever the voice of reason, and forever on the side of progress is the balm you didn’t realize you’d need.

“I agree, this is an opportunity to do good with the knowledge we have acquired over our years,” Dr. Spence’s agreement catches you off guard, but the pride and satisfaction rolling off of SB tells you this is exactly what he’d hoped for.

“It’s simple, Kaldur’ahm and Poulí told us what’s wrong, you’re either here to help, or they can show you the door,” Tulla’s blunt and to the point, and you have the choke down the snort as you stare appreciatively at the redhead, you notice that Kaldur’s doing the same, some things, you imagine, would never change.

You’d all regrouped at the Cave, scientists and specialists in hand. Tulla had been Queen Veera’s contribution and envoy as she could not leave Atlantis without a sane monarch, and especially not in a time where the King had been compromised. Each recruit had been given the details during their travel, but once they were all together, the gravity had seemingly begun to set in. Dr. Rouquette was as vibrant as she had been when you’d first met, despite that though, they had begun a prompt discussion on how the chip works, and a prefatory analysis on the confiscated chip.

  “So do we think this is gonna work? Or should we be considering a back-up plan?” Rocket’s voice echoes though the open link and while the specialists continue their discussions, the team sends knowing looks to each other.

“this is the plan, the only plan,” you tell them seriously.

“Wait, seriously? You always have a back-up?” Artemis’ surprise is evident, and your lips twist down in response.

“Figures, considering her go-to has also been compromised,” Wally’s judgement is clear and your eye twitches in response.

“Sorry about that,” Zatanna’s voice is meek in response, and you catch the way Artemis, punches Wally in the arm, and his accompanying wince.

“So not your fault,” you finally cut in. “And I don’t hear you offering something else up, Wall-Man?” you state bitingly, shooting him a glare at which Wally winces again.

“To be fair, this was originally his idea,” Conner cuts in.

“Semantics,” Robin disagrees, “plus, Birdy’s the one with the connections to make it happen.”

“Gee, thanks, Rob. My genius and l feel so appreciated,” Wally scoffs, rolling his eyes.

“Right, so… back-up plan?” Rocket asks again.

“I don’t know! Short of contacting any non-affiliated heroes, or intergalactic organizations, I’m not sure what else we can do,” you sigh, a hand coming up to pinch at the bridge of your nose, while you work to secure your emotions and constrain your frustration.

“Intergalactic organizations?” Rocket repeats.

“OA,” the response is echoed by Wally, Rob, Roy, and Kaldur, you can’t help but notice this is the first time Roy was participating.

“OA,” you confirm, and then catching the confused look, on Rocket and Zatanna’s faces you add, “The Green Lantern Corps.”

“Oh,” Zatanna’s understanding is soft, as her eyes widen.

“We have a line to them?” Rocket asks, surprise evident.

“…We have potential avenues,” Robin supplies, defending your point while making eye contact with you.

“We do?” Artemis’ question is fair, and you hesitate, but your eyes lock with Roy, and then with Dick.

“Earth has another Green Lantern,” You remind the team.

“Is he not a part of the league?” Zatanna squints.

“…There were some concerns about his attitude and maturity,” Dick supplies cautiously.

“But they let Roy in?” the dig slips from Artemis’ thoughts, and by the look on her face you know she didn’t mean to project that particular thought.

  You can’t help the very audible snort, and a hand comes up over your face in embarrassment as everyone turns to you.

You catch the small smirk on Dick’s face, and Wally’s chuckling a little bit too. And when Roy turns to you, betrayed, you can’t help but start to giggle, and when your avert your gaze, they land on Wally. Which really was the worst move because then you’re both laughing.

“Okay!” Roy huffs. “Laugh it up, Birdy,” he scoffs.

“Sor-” you try but burst into another fit, until you’re practically leaning on Kaldur to stay upright.

When you finally get control, you catch the small smile on Kaldur’s face, and even Roy’s scowl has faded a bit.

“Sorry,” you say seriously, bitting your lip and straightening up.

  “Should we be worried?” Rocket asks, wide eyes on you.

“No, sorry, I just… whew, I needed a laugh, thanks Artemis,” you smile.

Artemis blushes a bit in response, “What were you going to say about the other Lantern?” she prompts, pushing the conversation back on track.

“Right, Guy Gardner,” you share. “Kind of a bully based on Canary’s files, it’s the reason he hasn’t been inducted. But he is a Lantern, and the ring did choose him. He’s based out of Baltimore, Maryland. If we fail here, we just need to get word to him, hopefully he’ll take it seriously,” you shrug.

“Reassuring,” Rocket laments flatly, and all you can do is shrug again.

  “Kaldur’ahm, Poulí, I think we may have come to an understanding,” Vulko’s voice booms across the room, and your head snaps to him immediately.

“What do you need?” you ask, setting your shoulders, as the rest of the team turns to face the brain trust.

THE WATCHTOWER December 31st, 23:16 EST

Infiltrating the Watchtower was not something you’d ever thought you’d have to do. However, somehow, you really can’t find it in you to be totally surprised.

Dinah, now freed from Starro-Tech’s control, along with Roy and Red Tornado had gone in as a distraction, allowing the team to handle the rest. Part of you had been hesitant to let Roy out of your sight after finally finding him. Not to mention Dinah. You’d twitched a little too violently, when she volunteered to go back, and Roy and Dick had both given you cautious looks as a response.

The waiting was the worst though.

You watched as M’gann, Kaldur, and Connor broke through the wall where the Bioship had docked. Robin kept an eye on the alarms and scanners the entire time, covering the Team’s tracks as he went.

Eventually, it was time.

  “RT did it. Wirelessly bypassed security for us as soon as he arrived. Savage shouldn't know we're here,” Robin confirmed, once we’d all regrouped inside the watchtower.

Aqualad nodded, before casting a quick glance at the rest of the team, “move out.”

“Currently tracking five League members between us and Savage,” Robin shares as you and Kaldur begin leading everyone though.

“Which ones?” Artemis’ tone is dubious, even through the link, and you can’t really say you blame her.

“Plastic Man, Hawkman, the Atom, Captain Atom, and… well,” Robin pauses on the last one and you turn back to look at him. “Green Arrow.”

  The team pauses, as they wait for the next move. There were nine of you, which meant almost everyone could double up, almost.

A quick glance at Kaldur tells you he was thinking the same thing.

  “Here’s the plan…” you speak first, “We work quietly and quickly. Take every opportunity to knock as many of the Leaguers out as we can before Savage and his cohort baddies realize what’s happening. Artemis and KF, you two take Plastic Man. SB and Rob, Hawkman. Zatanna and Miss M, the Atom. Aqualad and Rocket, Captain Atom. Leave GA to me,” the team nods, but once again you notice their hesitation.

“What?” you press.

“Are you sure you want to handle GA? One of us can do it,” Wally offers tentatively.

“No. He’s mine. But Rob, I could use a favor…”

  Armed with one of Robin’s recording birdarangs you split off from the group. You’re following your map to where GA’s icon is moving, and periodically you get updates from the rest of the team.

First it’s KF and Artemis.

  “Plastic Man in gassed, and chipped,” you can practically hear Wally’s smirk as he reports in.

  You turn another corner.

  “Hawkman’s chipped too,” Robin reports.

“Probably going to be out for a bit. I might’ve hit him a little too hard,” Superboy admits.

  You pause when you hear Oliver’s footsteps. Spotting the crates, you launch yourself up. Walking on the balls of your feet, you climb up, silently.

  “We got the Atom,” Zatanna confirms.

  You catch sight of a support beam, a few feet above you, and launch yourself up with as much strength as you can muster. You manage to grab hold, and then you pull your body up, until you’re balanced on your feet, walking the beam.

  “Captain Atom is incapacitated, but chipped,” Kaldur’s the next one to confirm, which just left you.

  You pull the chip from your belt, as well as the birdarang. Following Oliver’s path ahead, you toss the birdarang, it lands solidly in the wall.

A beat passes.

And then a second.

And then-

  “Ha, Ha, Ollie, over here!”

  Your giggle echoes down the hall, and Oliver’s quick to turn to the sound.

  “NG, status?” Robin’s voice rings through the link but you ignore it.

  You take your grapple line and wrap it around the support, making sure it’s snug in place, before attaching the line to your belt.

  “Birdy, you copy?” Wally this time.

  Oliver’s almost in position, and so you count.

one.

two.

three.

  You hold your breath as you lean back.

For a second you’re falling, and it’s so quiet you could hear a pin drop. Luckily, the speaker starts again.

  “Ha, ha. Ollie, over here!”

  The recording covers the sound of the grapple going taught.

  “Nightingale, report in!” Kaldur, and he’s serious.

  You get about two seconds before Oliver realizes the birdarang’s what’s making the sound, and you’re suspended in the air, halfway between the ground and the support beams of the Watchtower.

The chip, which you’d been flipping around your finger’s is poised between your index and middle fingers, and right as Ollie turns, baring the side of his neck, you toss it. You throw it the way Dinah taught you to throw a shuriken.

The balance had practically been the same.

It hits Ollie and there’s a second when he turns to you, arrow drawn.

And then he collapses.

You tug on the grapple cord and it slackens. You land on your feet, twisting the cord back into your grapple as you walk up to the downed Green Arrow.

  “GA’s chipped,” you finally say, tuning back into the link.

“We’re not splitting up anymore,” Wally says quickly.

  You roll your eyes.

  “Don’t be ridiculous, KF-”

“You didn’t answer us!” Artemis cuts in.

  This time you scoff.

  “They have to realize by now,” Robin speaks up.

“He’s right, we need to move. Zatanna and Miss Martian, you two head for the dock Zeta, Rocket and I will join you,” Kaldur decides. “The rest of you head up.”

“On the way,” Zatanna confirms.

  You’d started making your way back up, sticking to the support beams as much as possible, so far, you’d avoided any further League interactions.

  “That’s Dr. Fate, Icon, and Captain Marvel taken care of,” Zatanna speaks up, and you pause for a second.

“Too bad Cure-tech doesn't work as fast as Starro-tech. We could use these guys,” Rocket huffs, and your lips quirk up, she’s not wrong.

“It is a small miracle Queen Meera and Doctors Roquette, Spence, and Vulko were able to re-engineer a cure and vaccine at all,” Kaldur reminds her.

“And their combined 8 PhDs,” you muse.

Before anyone can respond to your joke, KF interjects, “If you guys aren't busy...”

Your breath catches, but Kaldur’s already on the move, “On my way. You three rendezvous with Robin and Superboy.”

  You pick up your pace as well, and are only partially paying attention when Zatanna gives her confirmation.

  “Uh, I'll be right behind you,” she offers.

  You manage to arrive at the main deck in time to Batman hit Robin.

  “I am so not turbed,” is how you announce yourself, as your jump down from the level you’re on, using your grapple to loop down to the one where Robin is.

“Yeah, me neither,” he promises.

  You’re on your feet in time to fall in step with both Superboy and Robin, both seem to be smarting a bit after taking on Batman and Superman, understandably.

  “We're not gonna beat them one-on-one,” Robin finally announces.

“Plan B, then,” Superboy confirms.

“And I thought my contingencies were drastic,” you manage to joke out before taking Connor’s hand.

  Conner grabs a hold of you with one hand, and Robin with the other. Using his strength he spins you both, before launching you one after the other at Batman.

You land first, grabbing a handful of his cape to pull him with your momentum.

Robin’s body crashes into you both a second later, and then the three of you go into the wall. You can feel your bones rattle from the impact, but when you slide down, you manage to grab a hold of a chip as Robin hold’s Batman steady.

You place the chip, before changing your stance to drop into a roll. You pop up on one leg, escrima sticks in hand, and Robin lands crouched beside you.

You barely have a second to catch your breath before you hear Superman and Superboy go into a wall of their own.

You both take off and you hesitate when Robin reaches to his belt.

“You sure about this?” you ask as you both run up to them.

Superboy manages to grunt out a, “Just do it!” as he strains to hold Superman in place.

You grab hold of another chip while Robin opens a box.

The green light reflects off their faces, and you watch as it seems to drain them both. Conner and Superman both start sliding down, neither of them fighting anymore as they go.

As soon as Superman falls, you’re quick to place the chip, and once you do, Robin’s shutting the lead lined box tight.

You sit back on your ass and let out the breath you didn’t realize you were holding, turning back to check on Conner, who was pulling himself up to sit against the wall beside you.

He lets out a groan, looking at you and then at Robin, “Ugh. Kryptonite… hurts,” he admits, and you can’t help the scoff that slips past your lips.

It brings a smile to Robin’s face though.

“Which is why,” he begins, offering a hand to Conner. “Batman keeps it in an overwhelmingly impenetrable vault at the Batcave,” he explains, pulling SB back to his feet.

“Overwhelmingly impenetrable, huh?” you smirk up at the two.

Both boys smile down, offering you a hand.

“Well, more like a whelmingly penetrable vault,” Robin corrects.

You snort, taking their hands, and they’re quick to put you back on your feet as well.

“Let’s go. Vandal Savage awaits,” you remind them, and the two nod at you, before the three of you take off toward’s the main viewing deck, where the main Zeta point was for the Watchtower.

Unfortunately you get there just in time to watch Vandal Savage, Klarion, and his familiar, Teekle, disappear through a portal. Wally skidding into where they had been not even a second before.

You redirect yourself over to where Dinah and Roy are unconscious on the floor.

Wally whizzes up to you and grabs your spare de-programing chips, placing them on the leaguers who were up here, before sliding back up to the rest of you.

“Congratulations, Team. You have won the day,” Red Tornado announces, and you let out a tired chuckle at the thought.

None of you have an opportunity to respond though, because in the next second, a holoscreen appears.

“Happy New Year, Justice League,” the computer announces.

You don’t catch what Wally said, but when you turn to him, he’s holding Artemis, and they’re kissing.

Your lip twitches up, and then Connor and M’gann too.

“I’m liking this Team more every day,” Rocket decides, smirking as she kisses Kaldur’s cheek.

You roll your eyes and gag at Robin and Zatanna, both of whom smother their laughs. Zatanna looks away as she tries to keep her composure, but Robin stares back at you.

“Milkshakes?” you mouth to him while no one’s watching.

“Definitely,” he mouths back.

“Human customs still elude me,” Red Tornado announces in response to the kissing, and you can’t hold back your snort.

THE WATCHTOWER January 1st, 00:42 EST

It took some time, but eventually the Leaguer’s began to wake up, and slolwy they all arrived back in the entry deck.

“Everything I thought I knew about myself was a lie. I'm not a hero or a sidekick. I'm a traitor, a pawn,” Roy’s tone was low, dejected, in a way you’re not sure you’d ever heard it.

Dinah reaches out, placing a hand on his arm, “Roy, it'll be all-”

You wince when you watch Roy pull back from her. Bitting too far into your lip and tasting blood.

“I'm not Roy! I don't know what I am. All I know is I need to find the real Roy. I need to rescue Speedy,” he counters.

You’d been too anxious to sit when everyone else had. electing instead to stand across the table from Roy while Ollie and Dinah took the seats on either side of him.

“We’ll help you. The team I mean. And if not, then I will. We’ll find him,” you cut in, licking over your split lip.

“Guardian is already searching Cadmus,” Batman add, reassuringly.

Ollie had been unusually quiet.

“We should take Ro- Red Arrow, home, at least, for now,” Dinah decides.

You caught her slip up, everyone at the table probably did, but no one commented.

“Of course, all four of you can go,” Batman nods.

You catch the tonal shift, and you hesitate.

You’re not sure you would’ve noticed it if not for the rest of your abilities, but you know there’s something else.

“I’d like to stay,” you announce and everyone turns to you. “Just for a bit,” you backtrack, “I want to make sure the Team’s set, and I need to speak with Aquaman about how we deconstructed the chips,” you expound.

Roy looks like he wants to bolt, not that you balme him.

Ollie’s holding himself stiffly.

Dinah looks a little queasy at leaving you here on your own.

“I’ll be fine,” you reassure them.

“I’ll escort her, to Arthur, and then back to the Zeta’s,” Batman offers, and you notice as Dinah realxes, but only a little.

“Not too long,” she adds, though it’s perfunctory, you can tell.

“Promise,” you nod.

She smiles once more at you, weak and strained, before she and Ollie take Roy toward the Zeta’s

You wait until they’re through before you turn back to Batman. Robin and Kaldur had taken the seat on either side of him, and the four of you were the only ones left in the room.

Your hands land on the table with a loud smack that echoes thorough the room, and all three sets of eyes shift to you.

Yours, however, are focused on Batman, “Something else is wrong,” you say.

You’re not asking, you’re not, because you know.

Batman hesitates, looking to Robin for a second before turning back to you, and then nodding.

“The entire League was under Savage's spell for just over a day,” Robin begins, sharing a holoscreen with you. “We've accounted for most of that time. But these six went missing for a full 16 hours we can't account for.”

You stare at the screen. Batman, Superman, Green Lantern; John Stewart, Hawkwoman, Wonder Woman, and Martian Manhinter.

Powerhouses, all six. Each in their own right, different skills, different tactics. It’s terrifying to think what they could have accomplished for Klarion and Vandal Savage in sixteen hours, the implications were limitless.

“Sixteen hours,” Batman repeats, “what did we do?”

STAR CITY January 1st, 02:04 EST

It’s another hour or so by the time you make it back to Star City. You’d talked with King Arthur, shared with him how you and Kaldur had gone to Atlantis, and that Queen Meera had been appraised. And then you’d circled back to the cave to shower and change.

It’s two in the morning when you make it home, and frankly, you’re surprised to see Roy still up.

Dinah and Ollie weren’t around so you assumed they’d gone to bed. They probably thought he had too.

“Hey,” you greet lamely.

“Hi,” is all he offers back.

You drop your gym bag down by the door, and replace the lock before walking over to the sofa. You drop down beside Roy, but you leave a healthy space, not wanting to crowd him. You turn, tucking one leg under you, so that you can face him better.

“I know it’s a stupid question, but I’m going to ask anyways,” you begin, but he doesn’t look at you, focused instead on something just past your head. “How are you?”

He lets out a snort, but it’s dry, and sad, and you can hear it for what the answer it offers. Stupid question.

“I don’t know…” he says after a minute of silence. “But… I don’t really know anything anymore,” he adds on.

You bite on your lip again, wincing when your teeth make contact with the split lip you’d forgotten about.

“Fair,” you offer, agreeing.

“It’s fine,” he huffs, shrugging you off.

Your eyes narrow at that, it was a lot of things, fine isn’t one of them.

“Roy-”

“Don’t call me that!” he hisses, and you pause.

“Okay,” you concede, swallowing thickly. “What should I call you?” you prompt instead.

“I- I.. I don’t know, just.. I’m not Roy Harper, I’m not!” the last words come out as a sob, and you flick the piece of you that wants to give him space the recesses of your mind, scooting closer and wrapping an arm around his middle the best you can.

“How about Red, at least until we figure it all out?” you offer instead.

“Stop,” he cries. “Stop being nice, and understanding, I replaced him!” Roy’s voice is low, and sad, and you know he wants to make his point, but seems not to want to wake up Dinah or Ollie.

“She’s asleep so I’m going to say the bad words she tries to keep me from using,” you begin, delighted when it gets a wet snort out of the redhead. “But fuck that,” you say seriously, and he snorts again.

Finally turning to look at you, though he’s stuck with it, seeing as you’re practically pressing into his side.

“Look, I’m not blaming Ollie but I’m sure as shit not blaming you either. And I think it’s okay to acknowledge the fact that what you went through in the last few days has been harsh. That it was thirty-one flavors of traumatizing. God, Red! I’d be a fucking mess if it were Dinah coming after me, but it’s not your fucking fault or theirs!” you huff out.

“You owe Dinah at least $20, for just the last minute alone,” is all he says in response.

You scoff.

“Look, Roy or not, you’re my brother too. You have been for the last three years, and just because you’re a clone, it doesn’t make it less true,” you say seriously, and he goes quiet.

You let out a long sigh.

“You should get some sleep, tomorrow’s gonna be a long day,” you finally offer after the silence stretches.

“Yeah,” he huffs, standing up.

You stand after him, tugging him into a tight hug, that he doesn’t seem sure of how to respond to.

“Goodnight, Red,” you say gently.

“Goodnight, (y/n),” he whispers, before peeling you off of him, and walking away.

STAR CITY January 1st, 10:22 EST

You slept horribly.

The worst ever, actually.

Okay probably not, but it was still pretty bad.

The light at the end of the tunnel where the two hours of no questions you’d managed to wrangle out of Dinah.

You were already in a booth when he walked in.

Sat with your eyes closed, leaning against the linoleum seats, and when the overhead bell of the entry door rings, you blink them open in time to see Dick find you.

You offer him a muted lazy smile, and he gives you one in return.

“Hey,” he greets.

“Hey,” you say, sliding down.

He takes the invitation, settling down beside you instead of across from you.

The two of you fall into a comfortable silence. It seems you both were talked out after the events of the previous day.

Eventually, Mrs. Lenetii brings out a milkshake for you both, cooing over you, before siappearing to take care of another table.

Your head lands on his and his fingers interlace with yours.

“Bad night?” he asks after you’d both been ignoring your milkshakes for too long.

“yeah,” you nod.

“Yeah,” he repeats.

Slowly you lift your head.

You’re close, the two of you. His face is right there, his lips.

He’s staring at you with the wide blue eyes, and you wonder if he’s suddenly as nervous as you were.

You thought of Wally and Artemis at Midnight, of M’gann and Conner, even Rocket. But they were all older. You and Dick were the youngest on the team. It had never felt like it more until right now.

“Um-” he stutters out. “I… uh.. Can I?” he trails off.

“Have you.. ever?” you question back.

Neither of you have moved apart though.

“No,” he admits. “You?”

“No,” you share.

He offers you a shy smile, and it’s the first one in almost forty hours that doesn’t feel strained.

When he tilts down, you move up. There’s no fireworks. And your noes’ bump, and you giggle. And then your teeth clack, and he laughs. It’s awkward and kind of strange, and not at all what the movies make it sound like it’ll be, but it was your first kiss, and it was his too, and it tastes a little like the chocolate and strawberry milkshakes you’d both been sipping on, and all of it together makes it kind of magical in an of itself.

No matter what happened next, what came next, you had Dick, and you knew he had your back.

everything tags: @butterfly-skinnylegend

dc taglist: @batarella @loninctzencarat @escapenightmare @uh-oh-howd-i-get-here

cnng taglist: @babymango-writes @smile-more19 @bruiscdlikeviolets @truly-dionysus @farfromjustordinary @sometimeseverythingsucks @dweeb-central @lucy-roo @casedoina @cipheress-to-k-pop @anonomano @seninjakitey @whelmedparker @officiallydarkgeek @midnxghtblue @unini @blackwhiteandshadesofgradient @dontmesswithbeebo @raggedyoldwitch @bouqet-of-gay @duckmylife18 @kendallambrosio @notslaybabes @torchbearerkyle @cynthiarose07 @mono--moonchild @emo-space-tea @notsostraightweeb @sassyspanishartist @ahyeonah @acceber1313 @onepieceformeplease @whatislifeandhowdoidoit @luvelyxp @lovelyartemisa @evermoore580 @mischiefmanaged71 @cryingnotcrying @aces-tattooartist @we-flower-fan @awkward-youtube-trash @laurcad123 @sanovr @feverish-dove @lolsnacks

[f1]

FIA wont break its rules by refusing to allow new F1 teams in Ben Sulayem | 2023 F1 season

FIA president Mohammed Ben Sulayem says he understands the concerns Formula 1 teams have raised after the governing body invited new entries to the championship. However he stressed the sport’s governing cannot reject an application for a team which fulfils the criteria it has set for those wishing to enter F1. The FIA called for expressions of interest from new teams in February this year. However F1 CEO Stefano Domenicali does not welcome the idea of expanding the grid beyond the current 10 teams and recently said the current 20-car grid is “more than enough”. The FIA and Formula 1 are due to decide by the end of the month whether any new entries have been accepted. “There are a few teams wanting to come in,” Ben Sulayem told Grand Prix 247. “We are happy that they express interest. We have been working with FOM and with Stefano Domenicali,” he said. F1 and the FIA each has the power to reject any applicant. Ben Sulayem said he can understand why many of the existing teams are not in favour of expanding the grid. “I can see the questions of the team[s],” he said. “It is something important. We at FIA have also this concern.” However the FIA can’t reject applications which meet the criteria it has set down, he said. “When you’re talking about the expression of interest, I mean, there are still regulations there and we cannot shut the application down and say no because we have another choice and we cannot also say no to them if they fulfil the application. So really, I understand the other teams’ concerns when it comes to another team. Also we’re not breaking the rules. “And I would expect them to understand our position when it comes to that also. That’s the way we can go forward together. You see. As I said, I understand, but also I’m sure they will understand our position. One thing that I will not do is break the rules.” Ben Sulayem welcomed Honda’s recent announcement it will return to F1 as a full engine manufacturer from 2026. “With more engine makes, you will have a much more accessible sport and we talk about the prices going down,” he said. F1 cannot be closed to potential new entrants, said Ben Sulayem. “At the end of the day, we have to make sure that it is not just a closed circuit that we open to big teams. So now with the PU, there was only one or two at the start and we will have six. I’m really happy the way it goes.” Advert | Become a RaceFans supporter and go ad-free 2023 F1 season Browse all 2023 F1 season articles via RaceFans - Independent Motorsport Coverage https://www.racefans.net/

[oscopelabs]

It’s Arrested Development: How ‘High Fidelity’ Has Endured Beyond Its Cultural Sell-By Date by Vikram Murthi

It’s easy to forget now that at the beginning of 2020, before the pandemic had taken hold of our consciousness, for a brief moment, High Fidelity was back. Not only did Nick Hornby’s debut novel and Stephen Frears’ film adaptation celebrate major milestones this year — 25th and 20th anniversaries, respectively — but a TV adaptation premiered on Hulu in February. In light of all of these arbitrary signposts, multiple thinkpieces and remembrances litigated Hornby’s original text on familiar, predictable grounds. Is the novel/film’s protagonist Rob actually an asshole? (Sure.) Does Hornby uphold his character’s callous attitudes towards women? (Not really.) Hasn’t the story’s gatekeeping, anti-poptimist approach to artistic taste culturally run its course? (Probably.) Why do we need to revisit this story about this person right now? (Fair question!)

Despite reasonable objections on grounds of relevancy, enough good will for the core narrative—record store owner seeks out a series of exes to determine a pattern of behavior following a devastating breakup—apparently exists to help produce a gender-flipped streaming show featuring updated musical references and starring a decidedly not-middle-aged Zoë Kravitz. I only made it through six of ten episodes in its first (and only) season, but I was surprised by how closely the show hewed to High Fidelity’s film adaptation, to the point of re-staging numerous scenes down to character blocking and swiping large swaths of dialogue wholesale. (Similarly, the film adaptation hewed quite close to the novel, with most of the dialogue ripped straight from Hornby.) Admittedly, the series features a more diverse cast than the film, centering different experiences and broadly acknowledging some criticisms of the source material regarding its ostensibly exclusionary worldview. Nevertheless, it seemed like a self-defeating move for the show to line itself so definitively with a text that many consider hopelessly problematic, especially considering the potential to repurpose its premise as a springboard for more contemporary ideas.

High Fidelity’s endurance as both a piece of IP and a flashpoint for media discourse is mildly baffling for obvious reasons. For one thing, its cultural milieu is actually dated. Even correcting for vinyl’s recent financial resurgence, the idea of snooty record store clerks passing judgment on customer preferences has more or less gone the way of the dodo. With the Internet came the democratization of access, ensuring that the cultivation of personal taste is no longer laborious or expensive, or could even be considered particularly impressive (if it ever could have been). Secondly, as one might imagine, some of Hornby’s insights into heterosexual relationships and the differences between men and women, even presented through the flawed, self-deprecating interiority of High Fidelity’s main character, are indeed reductive. Frears’ film actually strips away the vast majority of Hornby’s weaker commentary, but the novel does include such cringeworthy bits like, “What’s the deal with foreplay?” that are best left alone.

Accounting for all of that, though, it’s remarkable how many misreadings of Hornby’s text have been accepted as conventional wisdom. It’s taken as a given by many that the novel and film earnestly preach the notion that what you like is more important than what you are like when, in fact, the narrative arc is constructed around reaching the opposite conclusion. (The last lines of the novel and film are, literally, “…I start to compile in my head a compilation tape for her, something that's full of stuff she's heard of, and full of stuff she'd play. Tonight, for the first time ever, I can sort of see how it's done.”) That’s relatively minor compared to the constant refrain that Rob’s narcissism goes uncriticized, even though the story’s thematic and emotional potency derives from what the audience perceives that Rob cannot. To put it bluntly, High Fidelity’s central irony revolves around a man who listens to music for a living being unable to hear the women in his life.

While Hornby’s prose immerses the reader in Rob’s interior monologue, providing ample room for the character to spout internal justifications of his behavior, the novel hardly obscures or conceals this conclusion. Moreover, the film makes it unavoidably explicit in numerous scenes. Rob (John Cusack) triumphantly pantomimes Rocky Balboa’s boxing routine soundtracked to Queen’s “We Are The Champions” after his ex-girlfriend Laura (Iben Hjejle) confirms she hasn’t yet slept with her new boyfriend Ray (Tim Robbins), but doesn’t hear the part where she says she prefers to sleep next to him. When Laura informs Rob that she did eventually sleep with Ray, Rob completely falls apart. In an earlier, more pointed scene, Rob goes out with his ex-girlfriend from high school (Joelle Carter) to ask why she chose to have sex with an obnoxious classmate instead of him. She venomously informs him that he actually broke up with her because she was too prudish, an abrupt, cruel bit of business we actually witness at the film’s beginning. It was in her moment of heartbroken vulnerability that she agreed to quickly sleep with someone else (“It wasn’t rape because I technically said, ‘Okay,’ but it wasn’t far off,” she sneers), which ultimately put her off sex until after college. Rob doesn’t hear this explanation or the damning portrait of his teenaged self. Instead, he’s delighted to learn that he wasn’t actually dumped.

These are evidently low character moments, one’s that are comedic in their depiction of blinkeredness but whose emotional takeaways are crystal clear, and one’s that have been written about before. My personal pick from the film, though, comes late when Rob attends Laura’s father’s funeral. He sits in the back and, in typical fashion, turns to the camera to deliver a list of songs to play at his funeral, concluding with his professed wish that “some beautiful, tearful woman would insist on ‘You’re The Best Thing That Ever Happened to Me’ by Gladys Knight.” It’s a really galling, egotistical moment that still makes me wince despite having seen the movie umpteen times. Yet, it’s immediately followed by the casket being lowered to the ground as Laura’s sobs ring out in the church. In a movie defined by John Cusack’s vocal timbre, it’s one of the few times when he completely shuts up. From two-thirds down the center aisle, Frears’ camera pushes into Cusack’s face until tears in his eyes are visible, but what you really see is an appropriately guilt-ridden, ashamed expression.

However, none of this evidence carries any weight if your objection to High Fidelity is that Rob suffers no material consequences for his behavior. While Rob is frequently called out for his actions, he is never actively punished. He doesn’t, say, receive a restraining order for continually calling Laura after they’ve broken up or end up alone mending a permanent broken heart because of his past relationships. By the end, Rob and Laura get back together and Rob even starts an independent record label on the side. It’s a stretch to characterize Hornby’s High Fidelity as a redemption tale, but it is a sideways rehabilitation narrative with a happy ending that arises at least partly out of mutual exhaustion.

Those two elements—Rob’s asshole recovery and the exhausted happy ending—rarely seem to factor into High Fidelity discourse. Granted, there’s credence to the idea that, socially and culturally, people have less patience for the personality types depicted in High Fidelity, and thus are less inclined to extend them forgiveness, let alone anything resembling retribution. I suppose that’s a valid reaction, one against which I have no interest in arguing, but it’s somewhat ironic that High Fidelity has endured for reasons that have nothing to do with its conclusions regarding inflexible personal principles and the folly of escapism. Both the book and film are specifically about someone who slowly comes to terms with accepting reality rather than live in a world mediated by pop cultural fantasies whose unrealistic expectations have only caused personal suffering. It’s not unfair to characterize this as a fairly obvious epiphany, but considering we currently live in a world dominated by virtual echo chambers with an entertainment culture committed to validating arrested adolescence, it retroactively counts as “mature” and holds more weight than it otherwise should.

Near the end of High Fidelity, the book, after Rob and Laura have gotten back together in the aftermath of Laura’s father’s death, Hornby includes a chapter featuring five conversations between the couple unpacking the state of their relationship. During the third conversation, Rob and Laura fight about how she doesn’t care about music as strongly as he does, catalyzed by Rob’s objection to Laura liking both Solomon Burke and Art Garfunkel, which, in his mind, is a contradiction in terms. Laura finally admits that not only does she not really care about the difference between them, but that most people outside of his immediate circle of two don’t care about the difference, and that this mentality is indicative of a larger problem. It’s part of what keeps him stuck in his head and reluctant to commit to anything. “I’m just trying to wake you up,” she says. “I'm just trying to show you that you've lived half your life, but for all you've got to show for it you might as well be nineteen, and I'm not talking about money or property or furniture.”

I fell for High Fidelity (first the movie, then the book) as a younger man for the reasons I assume most sensitive-cum-oblivious, culturally preoccupied straight guys do: it accurately pinpoints a pattern of music consumption and organizationally anal-retentive behavior with which I’m intimately familiar. I spent the vast majority of my early years listening to and cataloguing albums, and when I arrived at college, I quickly fell in with a small group of like-minded music obsessives. We had very serious, very prolonged discussions filled with impossibly strong opinions about our favorite artists and records. Few new releases came and went without them being scrutinized by us, the unappreciated scholars of all that is righteous. List-making wasn’t in vogue, but there wasn’t a song that passed us by that we didn’t judge or size up. I was exposed to more music during this relatively short period of time than I likely will ever absorb again. Some of these times were the most engaging and fun of my life, and I still enjoy discussing and sharing music with close friends, but I’m not such a true believer to fully feel comfortable with this behavior. It’s not entirely healthy on its own and definitely alienating to others, and there comes a point when you hear yourself the way a stranger might, or maybe even catch a glimpse of someone’s eyes when you’re midst rant about some stupid album, and realize, “That’s all there is of me. There isn’t anything else.”

This is what Rob proclaims to Laura in the conversation when she tells him she was more interested in music during their courtship than she is now. It’s a patently self-pitying statement on his part that doesn’t go unchallenged by her in the moment or bear fruit in the rest of the novel. Yet, it’s this type of uncomfortably relatable sentiment that goes under-discussed. If High Fidelity will continue to have a life well after its cultural moment has passed, then it’s worth addressing what it offers on its own terms. Near the end of the book, Laura introduces Rob to another couple with whom he gets along quite well. When the evening comes to an end, she tells him to take a look at their record collection, and it’s predictably filled with artists he doesn’t care for, e.g. Billy Joel, Simply Red, Meat Loaf. “'Everybody's faith needs testing from time to time,” Laura tells him later when they’re alone. Amidst Rob’s self-loathing and sullen pettiness, Hornby argues that one should contribute in some way rather than only consume and that, at some point, it’s time to put away childish ideas in order to get the most out of life. It’s an entirely untrendy argument, one that goes against the nostalgic spirit of superhero films and reboot culture, but it doesn’t lack merit. Accepting that some values aren’t conducive to a full life, especially when it’s shared with someone else, doesn’t have to mean abandoning interests or becoming an entirely different person. It just means that letting go isn’t an admission of defeat.

It’s why I’ve always found the proposal scene in the film to be quite moving, albeit maybe not specifically romantic. It plays out similarly in both the book and the film, but the film has the added benefit of Cusack and Hjejle’s performances to amplify the vulnerability and shared understanding. Laura meets Rob for a drink in the afternoon where he sheepishly asks if she would like to get married. Laura bursts out laughing and says that he isn’t the safest bet considering he was making mixtapes for some reporter a few days prior. When asked what brought this on, Rob notes that he’s sick of thinking about love and settling down and marriage and wants to think about something else. (“I changed my mind. That’s the most romantic thing I’ve ever heard. I do. I will,” she sarcastically replies.) He goes on to say that he’s tired of fantasizing about other women because the fantasies have nothing to do with them and everything to do with himself and that it doesn’t exist never mind delivering on its promise. “I’m tired of it,” he says, “and I’m tired of everything else for that matter, but I don’t ever seem to get tired of you.”

This sort of anti-Jerry Maguire line would be callous if Laura didn’t basically say the same thing to him when they got back together. (“I’m too tired not to be with you.”) It’s possible to read this as an act of mutual settling, but I always thought Hornby’s point was personal growth and accepting one’s situation were intertwined. The key moment in High Fidelity, the film, comes when Laura finds Rob’s list of top five dream jobs. (In the book, Laura makes Rob compile the list.) At the bottom of the list, after such standard choices like music journalist and record producer, lies architect, a job that Rob isn’t entirely sure about anyway. (“I did put it at number five!” he insists.) Laura asks Rob the obvious question: wouldn’t you rather own your own record store than hypothetically be an architect, a job you’re not particularly enthused with anyway?

It’s Laura who convinces Rob that living the fifth-best version of your life can actually be pretty satisfying and doesn’t have to be treated like a cruel fate worse than death. Similarly, Rob and Laura both make the active decision to try to work things out instead of starting over with someone else. Laura’s apathy may have reunited them, and Rob’s apathy might have kept him from running, but it’s their shared history that keeps them together. More than the music and the romance, High Fidelity follows the necessary decisions and compromises one has to maneuver in order to grow instead of regress. “I've been letting the weather and my stomach muscles and a great chord change in a Pretenders single make up my mind for me, and I want to do it for myself,” Rob says near the end of Hornby’s novel. High Fidelity’s emotional potency lies in taking that sentiment seriously.

[maiassensibleblog]

Dear theatre people, this is what I mean when I say theatre is elitist...

(All views expressed are my opinion).

I’ve been considering whether now is the right time to post this but when theatre comes back (which it will, it must), it cannot look how it looked before. I love theatre with all my heart, it is the part of my life that heals the most. But the industry drives me crazy.

I want to address the questions: Why don’t people go to the theatre? And why don’t people care about theatre? My perspective is from a West End theatre goer who is working class, not white and not straight. I am not involved in making theatre and do not desire to be involved. 

To answer this huge question, I’d like to start with two definitions:

Elitist: Relating to or supporting the view that a society or system should be led by an elite.

Inaccessible: Unable to be reached.

I often see people asking “why don’t people go to the theatre?” with only responses related to accessibility. When we talk about accessibility, we need to consider barriers such as ticket prices, geographical location and ableism. An awful lot of people are not stopped by accessibility, but they do not go to the theatre. Why? Theatre is elitist.

Elitism is the feeling that you do not belong in a space because the people who are there are different from you and often appear to think they are better than you. In my opinion, this is the reason that the general public do not care about theatre. Elitism is built into the theatre world and this has only been highlighted recently through the BLM movement (I don’t need to go into this here, you’ve all seen it). 

From a personal perspective, I’m privileged to have been going to the theatre since I was tiny. We didn’t have a lot of money but my mum was really good at finding deals on tickets and I grew to love theatre more and more as I grew up.  I go around once a week and see a lot of off West-end stuff. I, a seasoned theatregoer, feel elitism every time I go to the theatre. I will elaborate on these in the sub-topics below but I wanted to point out that I am somebody who is relatively confident around the elitist feeling, imagine if you aren’t. You just wouldn’t bother and that is what we’re seeing. 

Tickets

The first thing I would like to discuss may seem to sit between accessibility and elitism but getting affordable tickets sits in with elitism in my opinion. I am often asked how I can afford to go to the theatre so often and my answer is always I know where to look. Why do theatres feel that it is acceptable to hide their cheap seats? The only thing that is achieved here is keeping theatre for those who know where to look. 

If you have not be brought up around theatre folk, you don’t know that day seats exist. Even when theatres advertise and say something like “£15 day seats available”, people who do not know anything about theatre will not have a clue what that means. They won’t know the difference between a digital lottery and a regular in-person day seat, they won’t know how to press buy now just at the right time on TodayTix to get a rush ticket. Having cheaper options does improve accessibility but the way it has been done doesn’t serve to reduce elitism.

Put yourself in the shoes of somebody who has never been to the theatre before. They see a poster for a musical that looks amazing, they google it, they see decent seats for £100+. They decide to go for the £30 option in the Gods. They feel ripped off and don’t bother again OR they know that those are crap seats and don’t bother at all. There is nowhere on that main booking page that mentions cheaper, good seats. That is telling people that they only deserve good seats if they’re rich. That is elitist. 

Image

My next two points spill into each other, but they are not the same thing. What do you think of when you think of somebody who goes to the theatre. We all just thought of the same old, white couple. They tut at young people who talk at interval? Yeah we all know the type. It’s amazing that these people, who usually have disposable income, go to the theatre and spend money there but they are coming anyway. Why are you therefore using them to advertise? 

Some theatres do this amazingly (Bush, Soho, Young Vic, loves) but most don’t. Some shows have gone too far (looking at you Heathers West End transfer) but think: What is the demographic that you think would want to come, but isn’t? If you’re trying to attract non-theatre goers, they have to see themselves in those who are recommending it. 

Obviously, some known reviewers have to be included to keep the regulars in but theatres must start including a wider range of reviewers, they must be open to criticism from young people, queer people, Black people... Then, they must show the faces of these reviewers in their advertising, they must include their views using their vocabulary. And once you get these voices (and start respecting them), theatres must start taking these views into account. A mainstream producer actually listening (and properly listening) to the views of not the mainstream critics? That is revolutionary. That’s showing you’re willing to change.

Etiquette

This is the big one. Theatre etiquette is elitist. I’m sure many people know what I mean by this: Hushed tones even when the show isn’t on and you’re in the bar, FOH using theatre-y vocabulary to usher people places (even things like “the house is open” mean nothing to people who aren’t in theatre), expected restraint to reactions towards what’s happening on stage. I’ve never been to a theatre that doesn’t use vocabulary that would be alienating to non-theatregoers. Only a few theatres don’t have that feeling of “we’re better than you” hanging in the air. 

I have been told that I do not match up to people’s ideas of expected theatre etiquette twice outside of fandom things. I remember them both. Once, I was laughing at funny moments during a funny play. The second time I was talking to my friends excitedly at interval and had some older theatre-goers tut and ask us to be quiet (hun, it’s the interval). As I mentioned, I go to the theatre all the time, I generally conform (even when I hate it). Imagine how you’d feel if you didn’t know the nonsense rules.

The solution? Dismantle the rules. 

People dismiss panto because is does this and it’s the least elitist theatre out there. Stop getting on your high horse about people openly enjoying themselves. And to those panicking, very few people are actually going to chat their way through a whole show they’ve paid money for.

We need more relaxed performances. We need more for disabled people but we also need more for young people, where they can react to what’s going on during the show and whisper to each other about it. 

We need more sing-a-longs. Musicals can create an amazing fandom this way. Six is doing an amazing job because they’ve fostered this environment. Imagine a Hamilton sing-a-long. Just sit in that for a moment. Imagine a person who had never been to the theatre before and has heard a few songs of the soundtrack getting the feeling of a gig from the theatre. It’s powerful and it needs to happen. 

Shakespeare

Nothing exhibits the elitism of theatre more than Shakespeare. The sheer prevalence of it. And, I’m going to say it: Nobody fully understands what’s going on. 

Why, as an industry, are you all so obsessed with a sexist, racist, homophobe who died in the 1600′s? People alive today are writing plays about stories that people want to hear, in a language that people can understand. Commission them.

That is all on that. 

Secrecy 

There’s certainly something to be said about keeping the magic of theatre alive by keeping tricks a secret. I totally appreciate and love that about this art medium. You watch things happening in real time that look like magic and it’s beautiful. 

However, the secrecy around productions has gone too far. Why are full on HQ recordings of shows being filmed for them never to see the light of day? I have seen the argument that people will not feel the need to watch the show if they have seen a recording but I have only seen that argument from people who work in theatre. Listen to the people who just go to the theatre. I don’t know what I can actually say to convince the industry of this, but theatre people will still come because there’s nothing like live theatre. 

What you will do by releasing a good recording is open the show to the masses (and make money from it). You will essentially be building a fandom. People can watch football on TV but choose to pay for a ticket to go watch live because it is a different experience. People can listen to a band but choose to pay for a ticket to go to a concert because it is a different experience. It is the same thing. You honestly need to get over this because I think this is a massive reason why this elitism still exists. 

Also why not release HQ footage even as a trailer? Stick it on YouTube for free, get ad revenue and advertise.

These are just a few things that need to be taken into consideration when theatres re-open. Theatre must come back better and stronger than it was before and it must get more people in the room. The people will need art. 

This is precisely the time when artists go to work. There is no time for despair, no place for self-pity, no need for silence, no room for fear. We speak, we write, we do language. That is how civilizations heal. - Toni Morrison

[jq37]

The Report Card -- Fantasy High Sophomore Year Ep 1

Sophomores and Spring Break 

Note: Hey guys! I decided to try something a little bit different and slightly more structured than my usual recaps for FH: Sophomore Year. I’m hoping this will be a little easier for me and a more useful tool for keeping up to date since there will be a lot more eps to keep track of and they’ll be easier to miss. Lemme know what you think and if you want raw, unfiltered opinions on anything specific, feel free to send me an ask. I’m always down to go off about literally whatever. 

We’re back, baby! It is Sophomore Year at Aguefort and the gang is on Spring Break. A lot is going down so lemme break it down. The Bad Kids, having defeated Kalvaxus last year, are all entitled to a share of his hoard and all the red tape is finally cleared so they all get 20k gold each (which is an insane amount of money converted to USD if you use the WOTC conversion rate of a gold coin being around $145 (circa 2006 when they answered the question)--which would be close to $330 with inflation). Jawbone and Sandra-Lynn are moving in after less than a year into a profoundly haunted house and it’s kind of a Full House situation because Adaine, Fig, Kristen, and Tracker all officially live there (plus it seems that Zayn has also anchored himself to Adaine’s tower--btw, Adaine took the tower that the haunted house obviously has) and you know all the other Bad Kids are gonna be there on the regular. 

More importantly, Aguefort gives the gang their big project for the year--finding the crown of the Nightmare King which was stolen at the end of last season--which is worth 60% of their grade (Adaine does a full Hermione at this information). Each of the gang has info about the NK but the trail has mostly gone cold. Luckily, Fabian just got a hot tip about where Falinel is keeping Aelwyn and she seems like a pretty good lead to start with since she was super tied up in the bad side of all the messiness of last year. Adaine is displeased to say the least. 

Going off to find the crown is super exciting story-wise for two reasons. First of all, it means the gang gets to hire, well, hirelings to help them and temporarily join the party! They ping basically every cool NPC they can think of (except for Tracker for some reason which is BONKERS because (1) she probably would have done it for free and cutting her in would still be keeping the money in the family, (2) she’s dope as hell, (3) she’s a cleric and the party can always use more healers, (4) she’s a werewolf so presumably she has skills that would help in the woods, and (5) they’re t r a c k i n g down a crown and the girl’s name is literally T R A C K E R, but I will not backseat D&D) and eventually end up with Ragh (who has been without an adventuring party all year, poor guy), Sandra-Lynn (swayed by a nat 20 rolled by Fig), Cathilda (!?) ,and, for some reason, Gilear (which Fabian is happy about, mainly for the opportunity to maybe bump him off on the way). Second of all, if you recall, Elmville is a pretty modern town but the rest of the continent is less fantasy high, more high fantasy. Horses and lanterns and all that pseudo-medieval goodness. They are gonna stick out like a sore thumb. I am very here for it. 

Everyone goes home to rest up but, after some ominous dreams, only four of them wake up. Riz and Fig are left asleep and then Brennan mic drops and ends the episode which is a power move and I am extremely upset about it but also, respect. Right for the jugular immediately. I heard Murph and Emily are on tour in the UK next week which probably has something to do with this but, in the moment, I did not know that and I really felt the hammer drop in my heart. It was wild. Cannot wait to see where we go from here. Plus, who doesn’t love watching characters freak out because their friends are in danger?

Random Thoughts

I have no idea what the title of this episode is or if it’ll even have one and not a number but I gave it a placeholder one for now. I also don’t have access to the stream yet so I didn’t get to include some info I wanted to (like a record of nat 20s, and nat 1s so I can track their stats for the school year) and I probably missed some stuff because my brain can only hold so much info guys. I’m not Brennan. 

I mentioned this yesterday during the stream, but there will never be anything better than the pure D&D joy of everyone, in character, talking over each other to clown on each other. They get the friend-group banter that’s a hair breadth’s away from bullying so true to life and it’s so fun to watch. On the flip side, the opening scene with everyone introducing themselves and affirmatively claiming each other as their best friends was also peak D&D. Found family= best trope. 

Fig and Adaine burn spell-slots at basically the same time to try and beat each other to the best room in the (Scooby-Doo ass) house--which is exactly the kind of thing that would happen in this world. It’s such an intuitive setting. I love it so much. (BTW, Fig ends up staying in the false space under the revolving grand piano because, of course).

Fabian and Gorgug went to recruit Ragh, who assumed they were propositioning him for a three-way. In his defense, they did do it in a super proposition-y way and they were in the middle of the LGBTQ student union.

Also, Gorgug gives Ragh an inspiring speech about thinking you’re your own dad which makes him burst into tears. 

Speaking of, Jawbone offhandedly says he’s poly but, like, based on some of the stuff he’s said, I feel like that’s not really a reveal. He also gets along well with Gorthalax and would be down w/ a three-way if Sandra-Lynn wanted to which, again, totally checks out. 

Arthur Aguefort uses Chronomancy to rewind time and catch a snide comment Adaine made under her breath, which is exactly the kind of frivolous use of God-like power I’d expect from him.  

I really love Adaine’s energy coming into this season. She’s in therapy. She’s in a good home environment. She’s comfortable enough with her friend group to do stuff like prank Fig (love that they’re gonna be living together now). And she’s good friends with Zayn now which I want to see more of based on their one interaction in this ep which was very cute. I am already on record as saying I would be down with her getting a ghost boyfriend--I mean, for the aesthetic alone--but I’d be happy with just more friendship. 

Fabian is also hilarious this season because you can tell he’s gone a bit soft from having friends and leaning into that (the friendship necklace with Riz) but also he’s fully aware that it’s happening so he’s, like, ping-ponging back and forth like, “These are my friends,” and, “What am I saying? I used to be cool,” and it’s very funny. Very happy the Aelwyn storyline is happening right out of the gate, both because I think Aelwyn is a very interesting character with a lot of potential for nuance but also because Fabian reacting to her and Adaine reacting to Fabian reacting to her is always gold. 

Prompted by an offhand conversation from Fig about rock and roll, Brennan--earning another feather for his Cap of God Tier DMing--goes on an impromptu five minute long improved diatribe about a bard who played such a good concert that it instantly impregnated everyone in attendance (dudes too) who gave birth to kids with sick rocker hair and denim jackets and ascended to Rock Heaven on their 18th Birthday. You truly have to watch it to believe it. At a certain point I thought he was gonna drop it but that was the moment he doubled down and kept going. Amazing. 

Watching Murph, in real time, make up a girl/boy/whateverfriend in Fantasy Canada was a gift. 

I don’t have access to the stream yet but best quote of the night that I can remember is Kristen choosing her room: This is triggering and I’ll take it. (Her line about her lesbian starter kit and the one about wanting a horse were also bangers). 

The group talks about what they’re going to do for transportation outside of Elmsville since they don’t really use cars out there and they somehow get from “disguise Fig’s tour bus” to “commission Aguefort to create a brand new animal that can hold six people plus hirelings, one of which is Fabian who is also riding his motorbike”.

I love that Sandra-Lynn’s Mom Powers work on Tracker. 

Basrar doesn’t accept the invitation to come with on the quest, but he does give Kristen a bag of infinite ice cream sandwiches, which is basically just as good, IMO. 

Oh Gilear. The man is sleeping in the Seacaster garage, being bullied by skater kids, and now he’s stuck on this quest with his ex and Fabian who actively wants him dead.  

Speaking of, I’m psyched to see more of Sandra-Lynn. She was kind of a sleeper badass at the end of last season. 

Ragh is keeping secrets which I hope the cast doesn’t forget because it could be nothing serious (like the high school drama happening with Skrank and the 7 maidens--maybe he’s just crushing on Gorgug who did full kiss him during Promocalypse) or it could be Serious Business that will blow up if the don’t stay on top of it. We’ll see. 

Oh, almost forgot. Adaine wants an emotional support frog. Every time I think I can’t love her more.   

Detention

Fig for Not Respecting Personal Boundaries

Fig goes full Emily right out the gate and, after finding out that Skrank (nerdy bird dude who apparently can get it) was not only dating Ostentasia (rich, popular dwarf) but also dumped her in pursuit of Danielle Barkstock (one of Ostentasia’s party members, the scandal), disguises herself as him with Danielle to figure out what’s going on. And, wouldn't you know it, when she gives herself away, Danielle immediately is shocked and appalled, as you would be, obviously. We also learn that she’s still catfishing Dr. Asha which is, how you say, for sure a crime. Fig, please, I’m begging you. Cease. 

Honor Roll

Fig, Riz, and Adaine for Researching the Nightmare King

Fig made both lists, look at that. Wasn’t my plan for this to be a three-way tie (also didn’t expect to use the word “three-way” this many times in this writeup) but I think their contributions were pretty much equally valuable. Rainsolo on the Discord wrote up this summary of the lore dump Brennan gave them.

[leonarsfrey1991]

Grape Cultivation Guide Pdf Top Cool Ideas

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How Do Grapes Grow Without Seeds

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And because growing this variety has obviously picked up since 1849.This is a variety of grape that is suitable for.No one can become a fashion and hobby for some while earning money because of the raisin.Sometimes new shoots and then escalating the water to the location and it is a joyful task to ponder about.It really depends on the taste of the trellises will have one thing to do, but it's really not.

Where To Grow Grapes In Canada

Newer folks to grape vine is to plant your vines will extend deeper in the soil!When the soil through inhabiting the hole and fill the grapes from your grapes are maybe new in the production and awards with some land can be removed completely so the water can freely flow inside and out the very first harvest.Remember, above anything else, so make sure that the soil's responsibility to provide organic fertilizer to the soil that your plants getting to your vines, so make sure the trellis out of.This is the many things to think about quantity too because this gave them additional money.But still, the fact that it is no room for your vines year after year.

In the summer, the grapes used to manage infestation, grapevines can take years.Grapes are available changes that might be surprised that a variety of grape varieties are classified as clay, sand, or silt.In the East, Concord varieties are good on arbors and traditional stakes.Meaning, growing one at home can be more resistant to rot and frost.The vines need around thirty to forty inches.

[weerd1]

Star Trek DS9 Rewatch Log, Stardate 1909.22, Supplemental: Missions Reviewed, “Treachery, Faith, and the Great River,” “Once More Unto the Breach,” “The Siege of AR-558,” “Covenant,” and “It’s Only Paper Moon.” (For Aron.)

“Treachery, Faith, and the Great River” begins with Odo receiving word from a Cardassian informant he thought was executed that they need to meet.  He informs Kira (while massaging out her sore muscles after spingball, godamighty) that he’s going alone, and take a Runabout to see if he can find the man. Meanwhile repairs are behind on the station and the Defiant, and Sisko demands O’Brien have them all completed when he gets back from a conference on Bajor. O’Brien is stymied, not having the parts he needs, when Nog offers to get them. 

He just needs Chief’s access codes to make the right trades to make it happen. Odo arrives at the rendezvous to find Weyoun, who wants to defect.  While they are heading back to DS9, they are hailed from Cardassia by…Weyoun and Damar. Turns out the Weyoun of the last couple of years died in an transporter accident. The Weyoun 6 clone is the defector, and Weyoun 7 wants him hunted down. Damar says they must destroy the ship, but Weyoung 7 knows the Jem’Hadar will never fire on Odo.  Damar mentions they don’t have to know he’s on board. Kira calls on O’Brien to explain why the Captain’s desk is missing, and Worf and Martok want to know why their bloodwine is gone. Confronting Nog, the Ferengi explains that the universe is governed by the Great Material Continuum, running like a river from places with too much of a thing to places with not enough of a thing.  He is counting on the river to get them their parts, with a little help from Ferengi trade practices. After one Jem’Hadar ship is defeated with Weyoun 6’s command, the Female Changeling confronts Weyoun 7 and Damar about what’s going on. Damar notices that the Changeling doesn’t look right, she looks dried out.  As soon as he mentions it, she changes and demands they get Weyoun 6. Six meanwhile, with Odo and cornered by Jem’Hadar reveals that the Founders are sick, all of them. He defected to make sure Odo was ok, and tell him that HE will be the last Founder, and de facto leader of the Dominion if the other die; and opportunity to reconstruct the Dominion as an organization of cooperation and peace. To Weyoun 7 to call off the attack, Six activates a built in suicide pill, and Seven is true to his word. Six asks Odo for his blessing as he dies, and indeed the clone dies in the arms of his God, his faith rewarded. 

On DS9, O’Brien expects to be derided when called to Sisko’s office, but Nog is there, as is the captain’s desk, and the repair parts are in the hanger. As they leave ops Worf and Martok appear. Somehow Nog as replaced their bloodwine with vintage 2309, far better quality than what they had before.  O’Brien is amazed, but Nog cites the Great Material River, HIS faith rewarded.

The A and B stories here almost get equal time, but there are a lot of great reveals here. The fact the Founders basically uplifted a group of timid tree apes to create the Vorta; the Vorta’s cloning practices; the fact the Founders are ill (there will be some more dire revelations about this later). All those heavy moments balance well with the Nog/O’Brien storyline.  Now, I have to tell you. This episode as a toy and nerd collector affected me deeply, and to this day, it is my policy that if someone really takes a shine to something in my collection, I pass it on to them. I like to call it, “casting it into the great material river.”  Whenever there is a hole on my shelf, something show up to take its place. I have faith my toys end up in the hands they should.

Kor comes to DS9 to ask Worf to help him go “Once More Unto the Breach.”  Kor has been marginalized in the war, and has not been able to seek glorious combat. Worf asks Martok if there is place for Kor, but Martok is incensed. Years before, Martok’s career was almost derailed before it could begin by Kor because the House of Kor was a great one, noble, and Martok was little more than a farm boy. Worf convinces him to allow Kor on as Third Officer in a mission to raid a Cardassian base. 

When Martok describes the plan, Kor states it was the same one he and Kang (last seen with Kor in “Blood Oath” way back in season 2, and before that on TOS) against the Federation in the previous century. The crew is overly respectful of Kor, D’Har Master, much to Martok’s chagrin. When the actual fight happens though, Martok and Worf are incapacitated, and Kor takes over, losing himself and thinking he is back in battle against the Federation and Kang is on his way to help. When Worf and Martok retake control, Kor is shamed and abashed, but their small fleet is also being pursued by ten Jem’Hadar ships. Worf devises a plan to stop them, but it will cost a ship. If that ship can stop even a few of the enemy ships, the others might escape.  Worf plans to take command, but Kor knocks him out with a hypo, beaming to the bird of prey that will face the Jem’Hadar. Martok monitors the battle, amazed at Worf’s bravery, but Worf appears on the bridge, informing him it is Kor in battle.

  They watch amazed, waiting for whatever ships Kor cannot stop to pursue them.  None do. Though it cost his life, Kor destroys all ten Jem’Hadar vessels, leaving Martok’s crew—and Martok himself—to drink and sing songs of Kor’s victory, knowing they will see him in Sto-Vo-Kor.

Another great Klingon episode, and a great end for the always entertaining, and slightly mad, Kor. This it turns out was also John Colicos’ final acting role, and what a note to go out on.  The heroic battle is pure Klingon here too. The tension between noble houses and minor houses on Qo’noS is interesting, as it will also factor heavily into “Discovery” in its first season, specifically with the House of Kor dealing with Voq, son of none. There are also a few nice moments between Kor and Ezri, who seems to immediately accept Dax as Dax. Perhaps he adapted better having already dealt with the change from Curzon to Jadzia, however even then he was rather quick to accept her.  An interesting quirk for someone so adherent to Klingon noble traditions.

“The Siege of AR-558” has the Defiant bringing supplies to a Starfleet outpost in the Chin’Toka system, which has not been easily held. The outpost has captured a Dominion communications array, and hope to crack it, but have been too busy defending it against repeated attacks. On the mission is Quark at the behest of the Nagus who wants a report on the state of the war. It isn’t good. These people have been defending this outpost for five months; two months longer than a tour is supposed to be.  They were 150 people, they are now down to about 40. They are constantly falling victim to “Houdini mines,” small floating explosives that hang in subspace and randomly appear and explode, perhaps somewhere you’ve walked a hundred times.

 Nog is impressed by the battle hardened humans here, but Quark warns him these are not the cuddly Earthers he knows.   “…take away their creature comforts… deprive them of food, sleep, sonic showers… put their lives in jeopardy over an extended period of time… and those same friendly, intelligent, wonderful people will become as nasty and violent as the most bloodthirsty Klingon. You don't believe me? Look at those faces, look at their eyes…" When the Dominion attacks the Defiant, Worf pulls back, leaving Sisko, Bashir, Nog, Dax, and Quark on the surface to help defend the base. Ezri befriends Kellin (played by Lost in Space and Babylon Five’s Bill Mumy) who is trying to crack the mine problem, and they start to work. Sisko sends Nog out on a scouting mission with two of the Soldiers here, and though they get a good look at the Jem’Hadar base, one is killed and Nog loses his leg. Bashir plays Vic Fontaine music as they await the attack, but when Ezri and Kellin get control of the mines, Sisko uses them on the Jem’Hadar, thinning their numbers before the attack. One of the Jem’Hadar makes it to where Nog lies wounded, Quark himself shoots him down. 

When all is said and done, Kellin is dead, but reinforcements and engineers arrive, allowing the one survivor of the original group to leave with the Defiant.

A grim and powerful episode that aims to look war right in the face.  Quark’s speech I quote here is really fantastic, but comes back to haunt him when he too, put in the corner, is willing to shoot to kill, to protect. Ezri questioning Sisko’s decision to turn the mines they were just condemning on the enemy calls into question what is fair in war, but also leaves you as a viewer to decide if it was the right decision or not. The Starfleet trooper with Jem’Hadar Ketracel White bottles, ripped from his enemies’ bodies, brings to mind the Klingon was saw in “Soldiers of the Empire” with Cardassian neck bones as a necklace.  At least it isn’t body parts, but DS9 does not flinch here, and it is a better story for it.  Nog losing his leg will come into play again very soon as well.  Back on TOS, Kirk would occasionally refer to himself and other Starfleet members as “Soldiers.” Here we see that’s true; makes you wonder if they plan to bring back the Marines we saw in STVI: The Undiscovered Country (the Colonel of course was played by Rene Auberjonois!).

Kira is visited by an old friend, Vedek Fala, in “Convenant.” He gives her a gift which turns out to be a transponder that allows her transport across the sector to the previously abandoned sister station to DS9, Empok Nor.  There she finds her Vedek is actually part if the cult of the Pah-Wraits, who feel the Prophets turned their back on Bajor. In charge of the cult, she finds Dukat, who feels since he once housed Kost Amojan that he now has been touched by the Pah-Wraiths, and chosen to lead their people.

 Fala shows her the Bajorans here are completely under Dukat’s sway. Indeed there is one pregnant woman, who with her husband have only been allowed to have kids because Dukat has allowed it. Kira is less than convinced, but Fala persists telling her the Prophets have lied about the Pah-Wraits and they are peaceful. Dukat meanwhile tells Kira he has changed, and he loves his people. She points out he has set up some weird simulation of what he lost, commanding a station like Terok Nor, with a horde of Bajorans who love him. This proves startlingly true when the pregnant mother gives birth to a half-Cardassian baby. Dukat claims it is a miracle and a sign, but there are some doubters. He meets with the woman, apologizing for the “weakness” that allowed him to father her child, but when she says no one else knows, he tries to flush her out an airlock. 

Kira and Fala come along and save her, but now Dukat must act. He locks Kira in her room and is going to take poison with all of his followers so they can “shed their bodies” to help the Pah-Wraiths enter the Celestial Temple. Kira breaks out and tackles Dukat just as he was going to take the first pill, knocking his from his hand. When Fala hands him just another one out of the box, Dukat won’t take it, and they all realize he was going to let them die and go on. He tells them it was what the Pah-Wraiths wanted, but they aren’t having it, and he has to beam away. Fala meanwhile takes his pill and dies in Kira’s arms, telling her it was because of “faith.”

Dukat going full blown cult-leader is right in line with his arrogance and his ego. It’s just another example to me though that one of the bets DS9 misses is having Kira kill Dukat at the end of the series.  Yes, this sets him to as a vessel of the Pah-Wraiths, an Anti-Emissary, but I thing all the personal grudges with Kira deserve a better resolution. And for those who freak out over Scotty building an interplanetary transporter in the Kelvin Timeline, here’s one at work with Dominion tech in 2374, 13 years BEFORE Spock will go back in time and teach KY Scotty how to finish his. For that matter, before the Voyager will show up in just a couple of years with Borg Transwarp tech too. The Kelvin Timeline works if you just look at the details.

Finally, fandom tonight watched “It’s Only a Paper Moon” as a tribute to Aron Eisenberg’s passing, so I made sure I got this far.  Nog returns to the station with his new bio-synthetic leg, but it hurts him and he must walk with a cane. All his medical checks show fine though, and he is interested in doing nothing but lying in bed and listening to Vic Fontaine sing “I’ll Be Seeing You,” the song Bashir played in “The Siege of AR-558.” When Jake can’t take more than three days of that song on repeat he confronts Nog, who leaves and goes to the Holosuite to hear Vic sing it.  Nog decides to stay and live in the holosuite for a while.  Ezri is skeptical, but Vic mentions he will take care of the kid. Indeed, Vic helps wean him off his cane, and gives him something to do by letting him do the casino’s “books.” Nog though seems so comfortable he won’t come out. Ezri asks Vic when he’s going to be done with him, and Vic seems to realize he too has become dependent on Nog; usually, he’s only on for a few hours at a time, but with Nog there 26 hours a day, he is now constant. 

 Realizing he’s putting his own needs first, Vic shuts down the program himself.  Nog tries to get it running again, but can’t, but Vic appears to ask him about it. Nog says he doesn’t want to go back to the real world because he’s afraid, as anything could happen. Vic tells him that’s life, and why you have to seize it when you can, and indeed why he was happy to have Nog there. It’s time though, time for Nog to seize it for real. Nog leaves without his cane, and reunites with his family. Later, back in uniform Nog visits and tells Vic he has a present for him. Nog has made a deal with Quark, and this holosuite will continue to run full time, allowing Vic a life. Nog knows it’s the least he can do since Vic helped him get his own life back.

Bittersweet to watch tonight, but a great episode that takes a long look at the trauma of war and the mental scars that can be far worse than the physical ones.  The continued development of Vic Fontaine as a sentient lifeform is interesting, able to control who does and does not use his program. Still self aware though that there are times he is “off.” Aron Eisenberg is of course terrific and this is an important episode for Nog, demonstrating why this was the episode his friends, fans, and family chose to commemorate him.  

NEXT VOYAGE: The Orion Syndicate has come back for O’Brien, and somehow the Tigan family is involved. The Tigans are Ezri’s family before she was joined; she comes home in “Prodigal Daughter.”

[yukimuraseiichi]

How to join Tenimo

I just joined Tenimo several days ago and thought others might like to try it too, so I made a guide on how to join! But first off, what is Tenimo?

Tenimo is short for Tenimyu Mobile! 

What can you do on Tenimo?

All of the music on tenimyu is available here. Sort of. That means you can listen to all the tenimyu songs, bgms, and karaoke legally and all in one place! You can view their music by album, by show, by song, and you can search by keyword too. You can also create your own playlists! (Note: Y’all know what happened to 1st Higa right. they’re non-existent. sad)

You can access and listen to their web radio any time! 

They post behind-the-scenes photos every day! They call this “TODAY’s 1 SHOT”.

You can read the cast blog! These are blog posts written by the cast members. They often include a lot of behind-the-scenes photos too. Some of them are really really cute and wacky. A+

You can view a lot of stage photos and backstage videos! 

If you ever plan on watching tenimyu live, you can join the Tenimo pre-ticket sales lottery! 

You can be chosen to receive rare tenimyu goods! For example, there’s a Bunkasai staff T-shirt giveaway ongoing right now.

You can choose to receive the free Tenimo mail magazine! (Note: This is not automatic. They will not send you things without your consent. You will have to actively subscribe to this.)

... and a lot more!

You can also “clip” the photos and articles you like from “TODAY’s 1 SHOT” and the cast blog, so you can have your own personal gallery. This is done by pressing the clip button.

To sign up, you will need only the following:

cellphone

Wi-Fi

credit card

your first name and surname in katakana

a japanese address and telephone number (doesn’t have to be yours)

As a preview, this is what the home page looks like: 

“Welcome, ___-san”

Yeah, you read that right. There’s also a Birthday Message! This is a special video message from all the members of the current Seigaku cast that will be made available to you on your birthday! This can be viewed only until one week after your birthday.

W O W omg I LOVE IT I WANNA JOIN!!!!! 

... is what you were going to say. (-_-)

Now, how do I sign up? 

There are three available membership “courses” on Tenimo: ￥300/month, ￥500/month, and ￥800/month (tax not included). 

I don’t know why 3rd season songs aren’t included in that list because they are available on the site.

The music is NOT available in the ￥300 course.

The ￥500 course can access songs from 1st season to 3rd season, and can create up to 10 different playlists. (You can have a total of 120 minutes only per playlist)

The ￥800 course can access songs AND BGM/karaoke from 1st season to 3rd season, and can create up to 30 different playlists. You can also access Tenimo special playlists here. 

PREPARATION

Before registering, you will need to prepare your name in Katakana, a japanese address (including postal code), and a telephone number. 

They do not have to be yours. Things will not be sent to the address and the telephone number will not be contacted. However, if you have a relative or a friend who lives in Japan, and you would like to subscribe to the mail magazine or buy tenimyu tickets, then I would strongly advise you to borrow theirs. 

If you do not have a japanese address and phone number, just look for japanese hotels or something on google and copy their address and telephone number, or use whatever you did to make a jp account for downloading Tenirabi. MAKE SURE THAT THE ADDRESS IS WRITTEN IN KANJI.　

Got that copied in your phone’s notes? 

If you have, then you’re all set! You can now sign up for Tenimo!  

STEP 1: Access the Tenimo website on your phone’s browser.

sp (dot) tennimu (dot) jp 

It should lead you to a page like this:

STEP 2. Click the encircled button. It says membership registration (会員登録). 

STEP 3. Scroll down until you see the blue buttons below, then click on the course you like.

It will show you the credit cards they accept (Visa, MasterCard, JCB, Annex) and the steps on how to register. 

STEP 4. Scroll down until you see the blue buttons again.  You will see a total of six buttons divided into groups of two buttons per course.

The first button is for those who want to sign up. 

The second button is like: Already have an ID? This is where you can log in after signing up.

Click the first button under the course you want to avail.

STEP 5. Enter your e-mail address.

STEP 6. They will send you an email containing a link that will lead you to the sign-up form. It expires in an hour. Click it.

There will be a warning that says if they find out you’re using falsified information, your account may get suspended, so just be cautious. 

STEP 7. Fill up the following:

お名前 - name (this can be in kanji or in katakana)

姓 - surname

名 - first name

お名前（カタカナ）- name (katakana)

姓 - surname

名 - first name

Write/paste your katakana surname in the first box, and first name in the second. Do this for both “names”.

It will not work if you write your name using the alphabet. 

It has a limit of up to 8 characters per name. It will cause an error if your katakana name exceeds that limit.  

郵便番号 - postal number

Make sure the number you enter is half-width (e.g. 123), and not full-width (e.g. １２３)

住所 - address

Copy and paste the address you prepared earlier. It should be written in kanji, and the numbers at the end should be full-width (e.g. １−２−３). This should not exceed 50 characters. 

電話番号 - phone number

You can use either landline or cellphone for this one.

生年月日 - date of birth

The order goes: year, month, day. 

性別 - gender

left: male, right: female

ログインID - login ID

Should be 6-16 lowercase letters. 

If your account gets suspended, you’ll have to sign-up again with a different login ID.

パスワード - password

There are two boxes because it wants to confirm your password. 

Your password should have 8 to 16 letters/numbers. 

Use at least one number and two letters. Your password should not be the same as your login ID.

STEP 8. It will ask you to confirm your information. Scroll down until you see two buttons.

The top button says “register”. The bottom button will bring you back to the previous page to fix your information. Click the top button.

STEP 9. Input your credit card information.

From here, I won’t be able to provide screenshots because I’ve already registered. I think there might be examples on that page, so you won’t be too lost on what info to enter and where.

After that, I don’t know if it’ll ask you to confirm your information, or maybe it’s already done. All that’s left is for you to input your nickname and birthday in your My Page.

To log in, go back and follow steps 1 to 4, but on step 4, click the second button instead. Enter your login ID and password.

The page will look like this:

(This photo is from a friend who registered a few days ago.) 

Click MY PAGE. 

Enter your nickname, choose your gender (left: male, right: female), enter your birthdate (this cannot be changed), and choose your “prefecture”. 

After that, click the button below the note, and you’re all set! Enjoy!

If you have any questions, feel free to ask me a question here or @ me on Twitter (genichiwwo).

[kcwcommentary]

VLD5x01 – “The Prisoner”

5x01 – “The Prisoner”

The Paladins are attacking a Galra moon base because of some intelligence they’ve been given. I still think Blue’s ice cannon is silly, and here Allura uses it to hold off some advancing magma, which I don’t think would work more than a couple of seconds, but whatever. They are in some huge shaft system built into the moon, and they form Voltron. And the animation of them forming Voltron is the same as it ever has been: In space. But they’re not in space, they’re underground. I understand the show is reusing the form-Voltron animation, but I’ve never understood why. Did they do it for the same purpose 80s shows used repeated animation: To pad time and not have to spend money on new animation? Or was it supposed to be some nostalgia thing? Regardless, the use of the form-Voltron animation here is super awkward.

Shiro orders them to “take down the factory machines,” which is a clunky line of dialog, and they blow up some stuff, and somehow that leads to the entire moon exploding. I really don’t think destroying a factory on a moon would destroy them moon, but whatever.

The Castle Ship is parked on Naxzela: I must say, that does not seem like a safe place to hang out. “Going on missions is a lot easier when someone gives you all the information you need before you get there,” Hunk says. Maybe you should have valued what Keith was doing back in 4x01 “Code of Honor” when he was nearly dying while getting you guys information. The show does this unnecessarily cryptic tone, as if it’s building to some unexpected reveal: Surprise, the source of their information is Lotor! But that’s not an unexpected surprise, it’s actually the opposite: It is expected. If last season’s ending was to be resolved any way other than some manner of cooperation with Lotor, then this season premier to this point would have been way too casual in tone.

Lotor states his motivation: “The Galra Empire is completely reliant on quintessence. Serve that need peacefully, and you have a complete paradigm shift. […] My plan from the beginning has been to find a way to harvest quintessence without resorting to the barbarism of the komar. Extracting quintessence from entire planets at the cost of every living thing: I think not.” The thing is, he’s not lying.

In the end, this show reduces Lotor into a cackling, cliché villain. At the end of season six, we’re supposed to feel surprised that he’s been a maniacal villain all along. The problem is that the show gives us stuff like this. His motivation, stated here, is not a villainous one. His wanting to preserve life matches up with his reputation of letting planets govern themselves that the two Galra discuss in 3x01 “Changing of the Guard.” He doesn’t want to abolish the Empire, but he does want it to stop being so brutal.

Upon hearing that Lotor has been trying to gain access to the rift, Allura responds, “Sounds like you are your father’s son.” Well, that’s overly simplistic of her. It’s expected that she would be particularly aggressive toward Lotor though. “This isn’t a zero-sum game,” Lotor retorts. “All I ask is to be judged by my actions rather than your preconceptions of my race.”

There’s a cute moment of Lance trying to be supportive of Allura, who’s worried about preparing for a presentation she’s giving to the Coalition. This is the part of Lance that I like. Allura gives her presentation via teleconferencing to four alien leaders last seen in 3x01 “Changing of the Guard” and to Kolivan (and Keith standing in the background behind Kolivan). Seeing these particular aliens again makes me wish we had seen more of them during the past two seasons. They are interesting character designs, and it would have given some continuity to the Coalition.

Allura ends the conference call with all but Kolivan and background-Keith. The Blades have been able to conduct many successful missions using information gained from Lotor. Pidge makes a very smart comment, “With all these successful missions taking place in such a short period of time, it won’t be long before the Galra realizes we’re using inside information.” That leads Lance to suggest that they should take advantage of what time they have left and hit as many targets as possible. This is some decent strategic thinking, which I’m not used to seeing characters have on this show. I am again bothered, like I was last season, that they have Keith just standing around behind Kolivan. They could have given the dialog Kolivan had to Keith, but this show would rather give dialog to a reoccurring character than to give it to a main character. It’s strange.

Lotor says any additional information he could give them would be more dangerous than the missions they’ve gone on based on his information before. He has information that he describes as “important on a more personal level” for the Paladins about a prison and a prisoner there. You can almost tell that he’s talking about Sam Holt what with the show then cuts to Pidge and Matt. They’re having a conversation with Nyma and bragging to each other about science and improvements they’ve made to rebel ships. I’m not sure I understand the locational logistics of this scene. Where is Pidge that Shiro and Allura have to contact her through the rebel ship’s communication system rather than through Pidge’s Paladin armor?

Shiro says, “We have a lead on Commander Holt, your father.” This is an aspect of episodic writing that has always bugged me. Realistically, Shiro would never have needed to say, “your father,” but the line was written that way to inform any new viewers who would not understand Commander Holt’s connection to Pidge of what that connection is. I understand why episodic writers write like this, but it always feels artificial to me.

It feels like a stretch that the Galra Empire, which has seriously advanced technology and spans the whole universe, would find a human scientist as being advanced enough to match the Galra’s scientific needs, but that’s apparently what the Galra have done with Sam.

Shiro says that “once the teludav is repaired we can all head over there.” Since when was the Castle Ship’s teludav damaged? And, since the Paladins have been going on a bunch of missions, at least someone one, even if not the Paladins themselves, would have had time to repair the teludav already. Someone like Coran. Where is he? Last we saw of Coran in the last episode, he was on the Castle Ship. He’s nowhere to be seen now and no explanation for his absence has been given.

Fitting her blind impulsivity, Pidge wants to go after Sam right now without the rest of the Paladins. Rolo tries to assure Allura that he, Nyma, and Beezer will serve as backup for Pidge. I’m still confused about the locational difference between where Pidge is at and where Shiro is at. The teludav is used to create wormholes, which the Lions cannot do, so for Pidge to be able to go to this prison while the Castle Ship cannot, wherever Pidge is has to be a long way away from where the Castle Ship is. It mostly just ends up feeling like this damaged teludav is a contrived way of keeping the Castle Ship and the rest of the Paladins out of the story for a while.

The prison is on some asteroid, and Green comes under attack by Galra fighters when they get there. Everyone but Pidge, skydives out of Green down to the asteroid. Matt’s jetpack, as a stand-in for a parachute, is a cliché and fails to function. Rather than anyone else using their jetpacks to maneuver to Matt and grab him, Beezer fires cables at Matt to lasso him. Eh.

They get to the entrance of the prison and find Galra guards laying all over the place. Someone else has clearly already been here. Other alien prisoners are still inside working. Sam is not there. Rolo loads everyone into a Galra shuttle and returns to Green, who’s still fighting Galra. The idea that the shuttle’s engines fail because of how many people are on board is nonsensical. Even if the weight of the number of passengers would prevent the shuttle from reaching the altitude where Green is, the engines wouldn’t cut off. And yet, off they go. Pidge comes by with Green and grabs the shuttle though.

Matt goes into the cockpit, Pidge asks if Matt found their dad, and Matt says, “I’m sorry Pidge.” Pidge reacts in an unbelievable way. She tries to run out of the cockpit, screaming, “Dad? Dad, where are you?” It is totally understandable that Pidge would be emotional, but that she would think Matt is lying to her and her father is hiding somewhere in the rest of the ship is not a believable reaction.

Axca contacts Zarkon. She and Lotor’s other generals “have something in [their] possession [they] think [he] would be interested in.” It’s not specified in the scene, but obviously it’s Sam. They want to “trade” him to Zarkon in order to be accepted back into the Galra. This is such a weird development to me. Since Sam was in a Galra prison, he was already in Zarkon’s possession. So, Axca broke into a Galra facility to capture someone to trade him back to the Galra as a demonstration of their worth and be accepted back by the Galra. It’s not like Axca is adding value to the situation, it’s not like Sam was somewhere outside of Galra control, and Axca captured him. This just doesn’t work for me.

The Castle Ship is now in space (so its having been parked on the surface of Naxzela at the beginning of the episode served no purpose). Found Coran: He’s standing in the background. Both Keith and Coran were relegated to barely visible, silent background characters in this episode; that really annoys me.

Zarkon contacts the Castle Ship. He’s offering to trade Sam for Lotor.

This season premier does not hold up for me on repeated viewing. I felt energy off this episode the first time I watched it, but this time, it seems just okay. I think the first time I watched it, I was caught up in seeing the show reintroduce Sam that I didn’t pay attention. Also, the first time I watched this episode was immediately after having finished season four, so the episode wasn’t functioning as a season premier for me at that time. Rewatching it now, I see it differently. The first half of the episode, focusing on the beginning of the Paladins working with Lotor, is appropriate follow-up to how last season ended. But the second half of the episode is so centered on Pidge’s character arc, that it feels like the episode is ignoring most of the main cast. For a season premier, you can’t ignore the main characters like this. I’m left feeling like a lot is missing from this episode, like the narrative skipped prematurely to this plot development. And given what happens in the next episode, these two episodes do not feel like the beginning of a season.

[lamiaward]

Disaster Lesbians and how their pining nearly destroyed Cackle’s

I don’t own the Worst Witch. I also have no idea when exactly this is in the Canon timeline, but it is definitely after the first season finale, before the second season finale and additionally ignores some parts of canon. Also, I got the initial idea from when I was looking up potions in the Worst Witch universe and then it sort of ....spiraled. The angst in this was largely inspired by a post by quirk-y about Angsty Cliches they love.

Warnings: mindcontrol/reading, duels, Agatha is darker in this than in the show, someone nearly dies.

The italicized text is either flashbacks or thoughts btw.

Hecate is known to be cautious, serious, strict, socially awkward and at least six more character traits to make it notoriously difficult to slip something into her drink. On top of that, she one of – if not the – most well-respected and most brilliant minds in her field. Therefore, she curses her own folly when she makes three glaring mistakes, in this order:

Somehow being goaded, teased and gently manipulated into joining another party (alternatively; Dimity, Mould and Ada). Letting her guard down enough – perhaps Ada was right, and she did need to unwind “desperately”- to enjoy a few drinks. And finally, the most glaring, obvious, moronic mistake she has made the last two decades; to not immediately notice it when there had been meddled with her last drink (more foolish still, to even accept anything from that woman, bloody inebriation and the twin voices of Ada and Pippa pleading with her to try, Hecate, to be friendly)

She is reprimanding herself harshly- the girls think her very strict and downright awful but her comments towards them is sweet and even coddling compared to what she throws at herself in her own head- with Mould’s arm around her. She doesn’t know what is going on, the uncertainty adding to something sick and cold in her stomach. Once, a vicious student of hers, started the rumour that there was an accident that made her incapable of all feelings, but Hecate does feel. Deeply. And right now, her mind still slightly sluggish and sometimes getting too stuck on things like the tangy smell of Marigold’s perfume or shampoo, there is a very rare emotion that threatens to overpower her: Fear.

The fear is the only emotion left that is still strong enough to push through the veil created by the potion, and worsened by the alcohol she has consumed. It is not just that everything registers differently, the familiar corners and staircases from the castles passing by with Hecate struggling to hold on to the knowledge of where they’re going, but the fact that all her senses are rapidly beaten down.

She has always had insomnia, and once or twice, this was accompanied by sleep paralysis. It is a little bit like that, how she is completely aware that Mould looked chillingly guilty when Hecate stumbled, and she caught her and how her symptoms cannot be merely caused by intoxication( she knows which potion it, Goddess help Ada and everyone in the school, she knows ) but how her traitorous, useless excuse of a body refuses to act.

She is deposited in a chair, Mould muttering a quick absent-mindedness spell. They will not quickly arrive to stop this. She attempts to yank her head away when Mould gently places her hands on her cheeks, staring into her eyes. She manages nothing more than a pathetic shake.

“We’re almost there” the other woman whispers, and Hecate stares at her. Her heart is racing still, her dress sticking to her body with sweat, but for now, her physical reaction is all that is left of an initial wave of panic, pain and anger. And even that is quickly fading, her heart slowly down, her muscles relaxing almost enjoyable (like she is sinking in a bath with the perfect temperature) and the sweat cooling at her back.

She glances away from Marigold, which is about as much as she can still do. Something- why would I not just- that is the potion thinking. Symptoms; laxness of muscles and mind. A complete indifference to all factors, even life-threatening situations. An almost pleasant sensation, which in some, leads to addiction. You have approximately two minutes left, use them.

She takes in the room, counting the seconds in her head and trying to focus on Ada and the girls ( Ada is still wrong that she has a soft spot for Mildred Hubble, even if that is the first girl she thinks of) and the other teachers- to imagine what could happen to them if she doesn’t stop this woman. Right. Now.

She gathers every last bit of strength in her body, forces herself to access her magic- nearly impossible- and makes to transfer far away, using the twenty seconds she has left. The world shifts into and out of focus, dizzying images interspersed with darkness until – she lands against a wall, she has no idea where she is, and her clothing is absolutely soaked now. Her knees give out, and she slumps against the wall.

She is still sitting there, not able to think apart from a very soft, faraway I need to get Ada when Marigold Mould shimmers into being, and kneels before her. She is taken back to the small room, and this time, Marigold is less gentle (though still far from rough) when she cupts Hecate’s face and –

The corridor disappears, and she does everything else apart from Marigold’s dark brown eyes. She no longer feels connected to her body, can’t move her fingers, can’t even feel them. Her own magic struggles feebly in her, struggling against the potion and Marigold’s own tentative magic. Hecate is one of the most powerful witches of her (and truly, any) generation; normally, stopping Marigold Mould would not be an issue.

But now, her magic struggles once, twice and then dies out.

If Hecate were the sort of person who ate ice cream, and ate it too quickly, she would describe the feeling of Marigold rummaging in her head as having brainfreeze. However, the pain starts increasing, her fingers twitching and –

Stop fighting it. It makes the pain worse, and I truly do not wish to hurt you Hecate.

Miss Hardbroom, and that is as believable as Ethel Hallow genuinely wishing to start a friendship with Mildred Hubble.

And that is the last thought she has, before Marigold pushes, her own magic feels like it shatters against Marigold’s and she is plunged into memories, distantly aware that she doesn’t want anyone to see, let alone Marigold Mould- before she loses that awareness as well.

Her dad towers over her, a giant in front of three-year old Hecate. When he bends over her, allowing her to see his expression, it is one that will become familiar to her over the years. His stern looks almost perfectly matches her own more than four decades later, but his sternness was never about her being the best she could be for her own sake. It was always about the Hardbroom reputation, or what he could gain from his daughter being a potion prodigy, already casting charms at the age of four, having perfect posture on a broom at the age of six.

“ Do not disappoint me, girl. Do you know what happens to little girls that disappoint their fathers?”

Hecate has three seconds of remembering she is not three-years old, and what is happening to her right now is even more terrifying than her father before she is thrown back into her own memories.

Her mother is humming softly, one of the only melodies there ever will be in Hecate’s life that will not be linked directly to spell-casting. Her fingers are far more gently in Hecate’s hair than her father’s ever are, and she is patient enough to carefully get rid of the tangles without it hurting as much as when her daddy’s does it. She tickles Hecate, making her giggle. When Hecate reaches for the spell-book again, knowing her father does not wish her to ever abstain from studying, her mother gently takes it from her. Hecate stares at the new book in her hands, the cover nothing like the sensible ones that her usual books have. When she traces the letters, they’re gold beneath her fingers. The background is a sea,  a mixture of varying shades of green and blue with two women standing in front of it. Their foreheads are touching, their hands tightly intertwined and one has a broken crown laying at her feet. The other has a gorgeous seal coat resting on her shoulders, worn almost like a cape. Her mother opens the book, and starts to read.

“Once, there was a queen as kind as she was beautiful…”

It feels like drowning, and then coming up for water. She is plunged in immediately this time.

Her mother’s still face, peaceful and quiet the way she never was in life. The flowers are wrong- they’re not her mother’s favourite, those are roses, just like Hecate’s. Her skin is cold but she still smells the same when Hecate kisses her forehead in goodbye. Her father grips her shoulder tightly, enough that Hecate can almost feel the skin bruising. She is torn away from her mother, pushed towards relatives she hardly sees, and good riddance, because she likes very few of them.

Her father behind his desk, his expression almost gentle as he explains what will happen now. He is as curt as always, but there is a slight sheen to his eyes and he almost smiles at her. When he stands up and leaves the room, he pauses next to her and claps her shoulder briefly. He doesn’t offer empty comforts, doesn’t promise it will be all right, doesn’t say anything at all. She stands in the room for a long time, staring at the spot on the desk where there used to be one of the few ‘frivolous’ things her father abided ; the wedding picture of her parents.

She packs her belongings; a few dresses, her books, some shoes and the presents from her mother she has fortunately managed to hide from her father. Her father doesn’t accompany her, but he leaves his study for a short goodbye, a reminder to perform to Hardbroom standards, and a quick squeeze of her arm. She leaves for her new school immediately afterwards, ignoring the sharp pain in her eyes whenever she sees girls hug their mothers, and introduces herself to the headmistress with a perfectly executed ‘well- met’. When she walks inside, she rolls her eyes at the girls huddling together, giggling. There is one in particular that looks like the frivolous type of girl her father always warns her she must never become, or never get close to : her blonde hair is styled perfectly, with a gaudy, rainbow butterfly clip stuck to it. She makes a mental note to avoid these girls.

She doesn’t know who the witch in front of her is, nor why they are in a corridor. Before she can solve the mystery, there is that coldness in her head again and a new memory is forced upon her.

The forest behind the school is quiet, her footsteps unnaturally loud as a result. She walks until the sounds of the first-years being yelled at by the sports teacher fades, and all that is left, is the soft, bearable sounds of birds chirping and animals moving through the bushes, or beneath the ground. She looks down at the book she brought, naming the ingredients, when a voice calls her name.

“ Hecate!” she blinks, freezes as Pippa Pentangle barrels towards her. She is wearing pink as always, both her headband and the sweater tied around her neck a particularly bright shade of pink.

“ You look like an Ordinary person” Hecate tells her as she skids to a stop in front of her, eying Pippa’s jeans and her t-shirt with disdain. She eyes the picture of a witch’s familiar with the words “me-WOW” with an especially large amount of disdain.

Pippa just rolls her eyes. “ Good morning to you too, Hecate Hardbroom”

“ I doubt that the teachers have approved of this outfit” Hecate tells her

Pippa grins at her “Are you concerned for me, Hecate?”

Hecate bristles. “ Hardly. I merely am wondering how you remain at this school, with your lack of respect for Tradition and the rules”

“ I respect Tradition” Pippa protests. “ I just do not blindly follow it, unlike some” her voice drops slightly at the last word, becoming almost cold.

“Well. If that is the reason you felt inclined to barge towards me, I will just- “

“ No, wait, Hecate- “ Pippa grabs her wrist, then immediately lets go when she flinches and frowns at her. She shakes it off a second later, giving Hecate a sheepish smile. “ I apologize, all right? That was uncalled for”

“ I accept your apology” Hecate says stiffly. “ If that is all, I really- “

“ We could gather ingredients together” Pippa blurts out.

“I- how did you know that that was why I was here?”

“You are a witch abiding to strict rules you set yourself, which seem to mainly focus on constant study. If I were to guess, I would think you even find a nice walk in the woods ‘frivolous’, so it isn’t truly that difficult to come to the conclusion you are here for academic reasons, aka gathering ingredients for the potion exams which are only next month”

“These exams require practise. If you wish to waste your time giggling in the library with the others, that is your decision but- “

“ I don’t. That’s why I am here – because I enjoy the quietude of the woods of course, but also because I was trying to prepare for the exams’.

Hecate stares at her. “ It is hardly conductive to studying to be distracted by another person”

Pippa rolls her eyes again. “ It will be quicker, and I promise not to distract you with my ‘silliness and frivolity’. Come on!”

She takes Hecate’s hand, who pulls away immediately but follows her after a short hesitation.

There’s the witch again, and the corridor, and then she loses herself in the next memories.

Pippa, her eyes bright, as she waves at a gaggle of girls but further ignores them, sitting down next to Hecate and apologizing when Hecate flinches. She is quieter than Hecate has ever known her, only interrupting Hecate to ask insightful questions or discuss the text whenever it is too dense and vague to truly make sense. She offers to walk Hecate to her room. Hecate declines.

Pippa, running after Hecate when those witches are done laughing, throwing an arm around her and not even looking bothered when Hecate shrugs it off. They walk to their next class together, and Pippa manages to distract her by asking her about Hecate’s project for the midterm exam. They discuss the flaws of their potions’ textbook until they walk into charms, and Pippa tugs her to two empty seats.

Pippa barging into her room, jumping on the bed and singing with her hands cupped around a cupcake. Her absolutely furious and affronted expression when Hecate explains she never really celebrates her birthday, apart from a sensible gift and a short talk with her father about what it means to be a Hardbroom. Stumbling into the room too late , the pink of Pippa’s dress unrecognizable beneath a layer of mud, and collapsing on her bed together. The book Pippa bought for her in London is still in her hand. The other is held tightly by Pippa.

Singing falteringly for Pippa, looking down as she happily unwraps the paper. Falling off the bed as Pippa throws herself at Hecate, hugging her tightly. Listening to Pippa’s cackle as they untangle themselves, and accepting her help to climb on the bed again. Sneaking outside to lay down in their usual spot in the woods, whispering stories to each other long into the night.

Heaving over the small toilet in her room, the words ringing in her ears. A headache pounding behind her eyes, her shoulder sore from where they pushed her against the wall. Sitting down on her bed, books opened around her, but not taking in anything. Falling asleep until Pippa barges in her room, concern turning to hurt turning to fury turning to hurt again as Hecate ignores her and finally, pushes her away.

The corridor is darker, the witch looks tired. The spell allows her to remember, for a moment – Ada, the girls, I- and then she is lost again.

Long nights studying, ignoring classmates that invite her or that ask her to be in their group. Graduating, the apprenticeship. Brewing potions, short talks with the other witch, correspondence with one of her other professors, the witch she met at a conference, an expert on flower-based potions.. Her interview for Cackle’s, discussions with Ada, being dragged to staff nights, teaching, correcting papers, conferences, teaching, corresponding, tea in Ada’s office, Ada, arguments with Dimitry, another graduation, late-night discussions with Ada, Mildred Hubble screaming “watch out”, Mildred’s Hubble flying, broom-less, into the room, the duel, Ethel Hallow’s nose turned into a pig nose, Ada laughing good-naturedly at her, Mildred Hubble, correcting papers, correspondence, the mists, the –

The corridor appears abruptly, and the witch in front of her gasps and stares at her, wide-eyed. She slowly starts to smile. It is not a good smile. It is not her usual smile, either .

“ Ada Cackle is not the oldest daughter. The castle belongs to Agatha”

Hecate wakes up feeling truly horrible.

She has not had a headache this terrible since the time Dimitry spiked the punch at a staff party. Her limbs all feel as though someone has cast the Bivirgata hex on her. She gags, shuddering as her entire body seems to revolt at the small motion. Sweat is sticking to her everywhere, but her skin is goose bumping at the same time.

She tries to push herself up, her arms trembling. Ada. I need to warn her. She pushes herself up more, ignoring her body’s protests. Ignore the pain, you foolish woman. How could you not recognize that potion, are you a potion mistress or not. And you knew that that woman was not to be trusted, you should’ve – a low laugh interrupts her inner tirade, and she looks up.

She is immediately struck by rage and loathing, and her magic burns through her. She has to hold back a scream at the pain, then slumps slightly as the headache lessens, and she can actually feel her limbs again.

“ Agatha” she spits

The other woman smiles, and summons a throne-like chair to sit in. “I am here to reward you for your help”

Hecate grits her teeth, her heart stopping for a moment at the thought of Agatha already in charge of the school.  “ Are you ?” she questions, trying to gather her thoughts enough to think. She’d sooner hug Mildred Hubble than she would betray Ada, but if she pretends to support Agatha, she might find a way to help Ada.

Agatha smiles and Hecate is struck by the differences between the two sisters the way she always is. Whereas Ada’s smile is kind and easy, Agatha smiles as though it is a tool and there is never any kindness in it. “ I have always admired you, Hecate Hardbroom. You are renowned for your expertise in potions, and a prime example of the Hardbroom line. It would be difficult to find a more powerful witch than you, and your methods of teaching align far more with my own than they ever did with Ada’s”.

Agatha approaches her. “ It is a pity that you choose to support my sister, but I suppose we all have our flaws” Hecate is tempted to hex the other witch when she waves her hand and transfer Hecate upright, closer to Agatha than she has any desire to be.

“Ada deserves my loyalty” Hecate owes everything to Ada, whose fondness and belief in second chances sometimes frustrates Hecate to the point of insanity, but who offered her a job she loves (almost always) and a place to call home.

“ Does she? “ Hecate stumbles when Agatha pushes her away. Her body still feels battered, but she is slowly starting to regain her strength and even manages to keep her balance. “ I suppose I should not have surprised that you kept the true heir of this place a secret for her, but I still was a little. There is nothing you value higher than Tradition after all, is there?”

There is something about Agatha that makes Hecate even more tense and on guard than usually . And the way she phrases it- Hecate feels shivers shoot up her back. Hecate manages to make her voice calm and aloof, but if Agatha had turned around, she would have seen the split second where Hecate cannot hide the emotions she manages to keep out of her voice.

“ I judged that she did” she apologizes to Ada in her head for the ambiguous answer while at the same moment hoping desperately that she can manipulate Agatha in trusting her enough to not dispatch her.

Agatha turns around, still smiling thinly. She walks towards Hecate with two cups of tea; waves her hand again to summon another chair. “ Sit” she commands, waiting until Hecate has sat down very stiffly before settling in her own chair.

While Agatha sips her tea, the other cup of tea floats towards Hecate. She regards it coldly. “ Considering recent events, you will have to excuse my hesitance to accept any offerings from you “

Agatha’s smile becomes that bit more sinister. “ You already gave me all the information I needed, and quite a bit more” she nods at the tea which is still floating in front of Hecate. “ I did not add anything to that, nor did miss Mould. It is simply tea, taken from the kitchens”

Hecate concentrates, pushing the tea away from her with magic. It lands on a table next to her.  “ Why are we here, miss Cackle?”

Agatha sips her tea, then vanishes it with a snap of her fingers. “ You could be very useful to me, Hecate Hardbroom. The only true obstacle is your loyalty to Ada, but perhaps your respect for the Craft and Tradition will be enough to keep you from doing anything… foolish”

“Are you offering me to remain as deputy headmistress if you take over Cackle’s?”

“ I am offering you the chance of a lifetime. If you promise loyalty to me, and I can be certain that it is not merely a ruse, you can remain not just deputy of this academy but you can be my right hand in everything”

Hecate feels her chest hurt the way it usually only does if she has physically exerted herself, especially by running. “ You will not stop at Cackle’s”

It is not truly a question, but Agatha answers it nonetheless. “ I suspect that I will find the Great Wizard to be unwilling to acknowledge my right, despite the proof I will have – “

“ Proof that you acquired illegally. According to the Code, subsection- “

“ A witch is not allowed to use magic on another witch that brings harm to her in any way, yes. Just like it is against the Code for Ada to be headmistress, and you have broken the Code as well. But this is not about the Code, Hecate, and I will not be using your memories to justify my position as headmistress”

Agatha summons a familiar piece of paper into the office, and Hecate stares at it with horror. She clears her throat, and quickly smooths over her expression.  “I see. And do you believe that will allow you to take command of the school?”

“ Well, I imagine a few people will attempt to complain, but I do not require your help with those. However, the Great Wizard is another issue altogether, one that will be needed taken care of with your help”

“I hardly think the same plan will work a second time, the Great Wizard is not a complete fool”

“I will have my coven here, including miss Mould. While the members of my coven are taking care of whoever he brings with him, miss Mould and I will use a spell I have prepared to trap him long enough for you to act”

“ We will not have time to evacuate the building, and bring all the girls to safety”

“they could be valuable for- “

“Are you suggesting we force children to duel our best duellists?” Hecate thought she could never be more revolted and disturbed by Agatha Cackle than she already was. She was very wrong.

“ Not necessarily, but their very presence in the castle will be a powerful defence- after all, we can expect that the Great Wizard does not wish the bad press that he allowed children to be slaughtered- “

Hecate stares at her, rapidly considering her options. She remains too weak to duel Agatha with enough chances of winning. Ada is likely locked up; the other teachers are either similarly detained, or are otherwise kept under Agatha’s thumb. If she transfers away to get help, this just leaves the girls even less protected. Her mind processes this all with enough speed to force her initial reaction down, using a Herculean amount of strength to push down on her feelings, and force a neutral expression.

“What about the other teachers? They will likely attempt to act against you”

Hecate never thought that Agatha was insane- she knew she was cruel, selfish, downright narcissistic yes, but she did not think she was insane. But this- this entire plan, the decision to carelessly sacrifice children and Agatha’s little smile right now. Hecate needs all her famous self-control to not speak this realization out loud.

“ Your former colleagues are all taken care of, I promise you. They will not be able to throw a broomstick in our plans”

You are insane.

Agatha stands up.  “I will leave you now, to think about what we have discussed. Miss Mould will keep you company”

Agatha fades, transferring away, and Hecate is left with one of the people she despises most right now.

Apparently, Agatha truly does not use the same tactics twice. Hecate is standing in her office, but Ada has not been trapped in the painting this time. In fact, Hecate has no idea where the best friend she has ever had is , and she knows that asking after Ada will only lead to suspicion, and more trouble. She mutters an apology to Ada again, and allows herself to show her agitation only by grabbing her watch tightly, a gesture only a few will recognize as her attempting to calm herself.

She stands quietly next to Agatha as she gives them their respective orders.

“Marigold, you will remain with the brats- “ Hecate reminds herself that turning Agatha into a frog will not be a smart course of action, as one of her lackeys will simply turn her back and the girls will be in even more danger. Morgana will not arrive in the room quickly enough to eat frog Agatha.

“ I want them locked up in their rooms, and under supervision. Delilah and Jenny- “

Marigold swallows. “ May I suggest – “

“ What” Agatha hisses.

“ It is just- perhaps it is wiser to assign a different function to Jenny?” Marigold looks slightly pale and sweetish and smiles at the woman Hecate supposes is Jenny, someone who makes Hecate look sweet and cuddly in comparison. Marigold laughs awkwardly.  “ You never enjoyed the company of children, did you? Bats, I remember- “

“On the contrary, I have always found it hilarious how much they scream when you…. play a little with them”  

Agatha raises her eyebrows slightly. “ Jenny, you will be positioned close to the castle doors. You will remain in position unless the castle is attacked, in which case you have my permission to use any means available to defend me”

Agatha finally turns to Hecate. “ You will have to convince him to drink this”

Hecate actually takes a small step back, her body reacting without her permission. Fortunately, she has herself under control two seconds later-

Marigold has seen. She stares at Hecate for a moment and despite Hecate’s contempt for the woman and her general opinion of arts, the woman is not stupid. Hecate knows she is found out, is readying herself for a duel, a spell already half-formed on her lips and in her hands-

Marigold nods, once, and looks away. Hecate focuses on the vial again, forcing herself to reach out and take it. She takes it in a very loose hold, considering the consequences if she merely dropped it on the floor- another plan starts to form, slowly. “ You wish to take his powers?”

Agatha smiles. “ He could accomplish great things, but he is too fainthearted to accomplish anything” she eyes the potion in Hecate’s hands, then snaps her fingers and has the vial appears in her own hand again. “ Agatha the Great sounds lovely, does it not?”

Hecate keeps her thoughts to herself. She hardly thinks Agatha would react well if she released them from where she used to think they would be safe. “ This is a gross violation of the Code, there is hardly a witch who has earned her cauldron that would accept it. Even wizards would have enough wits between them to- “

“ I prepared for that reaction” is Agatha’s reaction and Hecate does not understand her tranquillity , does not understand how bloody smug she is – until she calls out to one the lackeys guarding the door and –

The lamps next to the door explode, leading to the lackey that came in cursing as the shards of glass cut into her face and arms. The woman half-leaning against her, however, is protected by a shield that appeared at the same time of the explosion, and Hecate frowns down at her hands with confusion.

“ Your magic will not work on her, Hecate. You will be unable to transfer her away, or heal her”

Hecate curls her fingers, shifting through a dozen spells that could incapacitate Agatha and two of the four remaining lackeys- then glances at Pippa. Her usually glamorous hair is sticking to her face where she is bleeding, her clothing is torn, and Hecate almost loses control again when she spots the bruising at Pippa’s neckline.

“Why is she here?” she forces herself to ask, to sound calm, to keep herself from transferring Agatha into a wall, where she will slowly choke.

“ As I told you before Hecate, your memories were quite enlightening”

Hecate would not be surprised if she threw up on her shoes. “ I – “

“ This is very simple, Hecate. If you pledge your loyalty to me, I promise not to harm miss Pentangle nor the girls of this academy. As long as they cooperate that is. As for my sister, I am afraid I have plans for her, but you can help Ada’s incompetent staff as well. If you prepare to betray me once again, however- “ Agatha glances at Pippa, who is groaning softly now. “ The alternative… I promise you will not enjoy that”

Hecate grits her teeth. “You are the rightful headmistress”

“ I thought you were above silly things such as love, Hecate” she glances in Pippa’s direction. “ I suppose I understand the inclination however, all that pink hides a powerful witch. She was not easy to calm down, was she?”

The woman still holding Pippa( and also still bleeding thanks to Hecate losing control of her magic) smile-grimaces. “Not at all, miss Cackle”

Agatha smiles. “ Lock her in my chambers” she turns to Hecate. “ You can have her back when we have succeeded”

Hecate has to use all her considerable self-control to not do something to Ada’s sister that their friendship -even a friendship as strong as theirs - would not survive. “ Do not- “

“You no longer possess any authority” she turns to one of the two witches that are not holding Pippa (are in fact putting a fair amount of distance between themselves and the pink witch; obviously they had made the common mistake to underestimate Pippa) and points at one of them. “ And bring me Mildred Hubble. I have special plans for that girl”

Over my dead body will you touch her. Hecate rationalizes that she would be this enraged if anyone attempted to hurt any student under her protection; it certainly does not mean that Hecate has a soft spot for Mildred, despite Ada’s claims to the contrary and Pippa’s attempts to goad her into admitting something as ridiculous as that.

Agatha transfers away once again, seconds after the lackey took Pippa away from her. Hecate feels a stab of panic powerful enough that she blasts the remaining lamps into oblivion.

“ Pipsqueak “ she whispered, staring at where Pippa had just been. I love you.

It is full-blown chaos.

There are explosions happening, stray spells are causing all manner of injuries- from almost comical changes in appearance to paralysis and limb loss- and Hecate is running away from it, only one thought in her mind. The girls.

She does not dare to waste magic transferring, her body already feeling the effects of the fight against the Great Wizard and the short duels with four guards, and she knows she will likely require a great deal of magic for what is to come. The fact that she has to run of all things, is just something she adds to her list of reasons to force some sense into Agatha Cackle, using a great deal of words the students would swear she would never use, and spells that would have even great-great-great grandaunt Hella ( who the later Hardbrooms attempted to erase from history all together, which is why Hecate is still not quite certain how she earned the epithet “Scourge of lands”) wincing.

She snaps her fingers while she runs past two people clad in the recognizable attire of his Greatness ( Hecate respects authority greatly, but this does not mean she can ignore the stupidity of making your guards easily recognizable), having large vines erupt from the ground and push them into the walls, before having flowers bloom that immediately release a sedative.

She pushes open the door, finding three more girls. She quickly transfer them, before they have even finished saying her last name. The other three rooms she checks have similar results, apart from one notable occasion where a guard actually manages to hit her shoulder and slices it open. However, that guard is also quickly taken care off and the next duels are over very quickly.

It is only when she approaches one of the last rooms that she runs into trouble. Agatha’s croons are here as well, and they are remarkably competent. They attack her with a speed that is almost inhuman, and whenever she wields off one of them, the other suddenly attacks out of nowhere.

Her eyesight is blurring badly, and her legs nearly give out. She barely manages to deflect three spells send towards her at the same time, and nearly screams when her shoulders slams into the wall behind her. She raises her hand, thinking desperately with the two shapes in front of her barely distinguishable as the world is fading out when she slowly drops it.

One of the two people in front of her was just hit by a broom , at the exact same moment that the other is hit in the face by a basketball. She stumbles backwards, blood dripping from her nose. It is just the opening Hecate needs, and she quickly blasts the other witch away from her, wincing at the sound when the fighter slams into the wall. She turns to face her mysterious sav-

“Miss Drill?”

Dimitry grins, still on top of her broom. She has a black eye, her robes are slightly torn and very rumpled and there is something odd about her hands- almost as though she has been improperly transfigured into a human form after having been an animal.

“ Who – “

“ A couple of older students came running to get me. They managed to turn me back- “ she wriggles her fingers, which are longer and have some sort of slimy substance attached to them. “ but obviously, it was rather advanced magic, finding me and all”

Hecate inhales sharply. “ Who – “

“ I will get the others, you keep being absolutely terrifying, okay?”

Hecate frowns at her. “ Miss Drill, please do make sense- “

“ I always knew you were bloody powerful, but it is quite something, seeing Hecate Hardbroom duel” the other witch flies away after that fanciful exaggeration, manoeuvring her broom in a way that has one person not just scream in pain but what might be admiration as well.

Hecate watches Dimity somersault over a person, her broom breaking their nose, and landing flawlessly on the broom again. She rolls her eyes (would sooner sell her witch’s hat than admit to the small smile) and turns to the few that have survived the rare talents of the first witch to become “star of the sky” not two, but three times in a row.

She makes quick work of the remaining four – thanks the three-faced Goddess for the first time ever (likely the last time as well) for Dimity Drill: they are all stumbling around, dizzy from being whacked in the face by the rear end of a broom and one even has an imprint of where Dimity’s frankly dangerous throw slammed that bloody ball she carries with her into the witch’s face. Hecate runs away, leaving three witches and a wizard in varying degrees of pain, stupor and restraints.

She barges into Ada’s office- and finds it empty. That would not be too concerning- Agatha has always been a coward, she simply went somewhere less predictable, she choose her own safety over drama and-

Hecate was once privy to a fistfight ( if it can be called that when one party immediately starts screaming and crying) between Pippa and a particularly vicious witch. Pippa was small and pink and always had sweet smiles for everyone- but she punched that particular girl so hard that she fell back against a wall. It is like Hecate is hit by a punch like that now, quick and painful and harder than you expect it to be possible.

She gathers her magic, throws it out to search for Mildred’s and transfers the moment she finds it. The world solidifies into the great hall, and one of the most enraging things Hecate has ever seen. There is magic that keeps the people inside locked in, or more accurately, to keep students locked in.

A small group of students is huddled into the corner, some burying their heads in their friend’s shoulder; others staring at two animals in the middle of the room. One of them is a cat species that honestly look likes a disguised member of the Sidhe, with thick and silky fur. Despite its considerable size, Hecate knows it is not an adult. Even if she had no knowledge of cat species, she would recognize her students anywhere, in any form.

She is looking at Enid Nightshade , and beneath her paw- there is a chubby, nervous mouse. It doesn’t have glasses nor the usual ponytails, but Hecate recognizes Maud immediately. There is just one-

Her magic actually cackles when she sees it.  Agatha’s cat, usually an average-sized black cat, prowls around Agatha as a 132-pount black panther. Hecate has researched and debated the effect of witches on their familiars (and vice versa); Agatha’s cat obviously has the same rotten character as his mistress, or otherwise he wouldn’t threaten a student.

Because in front of is a trembling, tied up deer easily recognizable as Mildred Hubble. She twitches her ears nervously, which is the last thing Hecate sees of Mildred before her magic is fuelled by the rage at the realization that Mildred is bleeding (a nasty cut on her side), Agatha is using her students for a deranged game and finally, she has somehow managed to destroy that infuriatingly optimistic-bordering-on-reckless spark Mildred always has.

She has given Hecate the perfect opening to destroy her. She mutters a quick apology to Pippa ( Pippa would be almost as furious as Hecate herself if she would endanger students in order to protect Pippa) and throws a Medusa hex at Agatha.

She deflects it, the way another person may swat a fly. “ Once, just the name Hardbroom was enough to command respect from even the oldest, strongest families. Is that all one of only three remaining Hardbrooms – or at least the- “

Agatha quickly vanishes when Hecate releases breath of dragon. She is one of the few people in the witching world that has the knowledge needed to bottle that particular ingredient, something Agatha obviously was not aware of, judging by her split stunned expression.

“ Do you possess a dragon, Hecate Hardbroom? That might be just enough to liberate these worthless- “ she casts a spell in the direction of Hecate’s students, something green that hisses and pushes against Hecate’s magic when she throws up another shield.

“ Dragons are free, independent creatures. A witch learns that they are not pets or possessions before she even rides her first broom. Something you would know if you ever had the good sense to listen ,Agatha Cackle”

Agatha sends a flash of light her way, a nasty combination of spells that drives needles of pain into Hecate’s barely closed injury when she halts it. “ Dragons are merely independent creatures because there has not been a witch bold enough to subdue them- and such is it with everything. You- “

Agatha blocks two spells Hecate sends towards her, staggering and quickly righting herself. Hecate bats her reaction, an elemental spell that fizzes and sparks as Hecate rips it apart, away. “ Ada may have treated you kindly, and pretended that you could be changed Agatha Cackle, but I am not Ada”

Agatha smiles nastily. “ And you pretend that my sister would ever forgive you if you truly hurt me? You are many things Hecate, but I hardly think you are a fool”

She sends another spell at Hecate, a bolt of magic that separates, and leaves Hecate with only a second to decide whether she wants to channel more magic into the shield that is protecting her students or protect her own body. She drops her own protective shield, angling her body away from Agatha spell at the same time that she feeds enough magic into the protective barrier that the air ripples and smokes, but the spell defuses without hurting her students.

Hecate, on the other hand, has to grit her teeth against the pain in her shoulder. She actually stumbles, and Agatha pounces on the perceived moment of weakness. She ignores the students, and instead sends three consecutive spells at Hecate.

She stumbles, and curses when they are immediately send back to her. she pushes a spell towards Hecate that makes the hairs on her neck stand on etch, and her dress starts to smoke as the spells get near her. Instead of deflecting, she allows them to get so close that she feels her dress almost attach to her skin, and hears her hair sizzle where the spells make contact-

She waits until the exact last moment that it remains bearable, and then uses all that energy against Agatha. She attacks the weak spots and pushes the magic away. As Agatha is forced to deflect and side-step, Hecate quickly casts another spell that cuts through her defences, and rips open part of her dress, and part of her shoulder.

Agatha grits her teeth. “ It is truly unfortunate that you choose the wrong side- we could’ve done great things together”

Hecate ignores her, as she knows it will no longer be necessary to spar verbally with Agatha as well. A window breaks, there is a yell and Dimity Drill jumps off her broom, nearly kicking Agatha in the face. Unfortunately, that does not happen but she does immediately throw up a shield, allowing Hecate to vanish her own.

Now that she no longer has to duel and protect the students at the same time, she fires off spells so rapidly that Agatha is forced on the defensive. The room sparks, fizzles and starts to heat up – Agatha’s carefully managed wig slants and sticks to her head pitifully as the spells strike her skin, deflect and rapidly miss her face, explode in front of it.

As Hecate uses a simple fire spell, cast on the floor and forcing Agatha to cool the floor before she gets stuck or gains a dozen new blisters, Hecate wields her magic, and cuts Agatha’s hands at the same time.

It is the oldest trick in duelling; attack your opponent’s hands, and weaken or turn spellcasting impossible. Agatha shrieks, and vanishes. Hecate casts a quick spell that shows her the other witch is outside, then marches towards her students.

“ Get them out of here” she orders Dimity, ignoring the stunned and terrified expressions. She snaps her fingers at the mouse, cat and deer; she holds back a curse when only Maud and Enid immediately reappear, looking confused and dizzy but – apart from a few scrapes- unharmed.

“ What about- “

“ We will return her to her usual state later” Hecate is not certain why Mildred has not been turned back, but they will have to figure it out. They will.

And Dimity tries, it is just- Hecate rolls her eyes. “ Mildred Hubble – being turned into a deer does not give one permission to act as one, now stop wasting our time eating that leaf and- “

She sneers at Dimity, who slowly lets go of her arm. “ It is not that, look” she points at the leaf, and Hecate is about to make a sarcastic remark, and leave them to it when she spots it, on top of the leaf that Mildred is keeping carefully in her mouth.

“ Mildred Hubble, what are you doing with that caterpillar ?” she questions, and honestly how anyone can believe she would ever see this frustrating, illogical, ridiculous girl as her favourite student is a mystery to her.

“ I-it is miss Mould, miss Hardbroom” Maud’s voice is still slightly squeaky as she speaks, although she manages to meet Hecate’s eyes bravely. “ She tried to help us but then miss- Agatha noticed, and she turned her into a caterpillar. Millie quickly hid her, because- “ her voice trembles again and for a horrible moment, Hecate expects Maud to start sobbing.

“ Agatha wanted to step on her, or something “Enid takes over, hesitating a moment before throwing an arm around her friend. She seems relieved when Maud immediately cuddles against her, sniffing quietly.

“I see” Hecate stares at the caterpillar, imagining Marigold in its place. Mildred is looking at her with actual doe eyes, and she can almost imagine the girl’s pleading- please, miss Hardbroom, just ignore the Code and instead make decisions all willy-nilly- when there is a loud crack, and Dimity yells at her.

Which would offend her greatly, were it not for the fact that it quite likely saves her. After all, it is Dimity’s yelling that has Hecate jump and flinch, just enough that the spell narrowly misses her. She turns around, hesitating as she sees his Greatness. He has four people with him, all dressed in the shade of blue that tells Hecate they are part of his extensive private guard. She stops hesitating when they fire haphazardly, not even paying attention to the dozen or so children behind her.

She hears gasps and murmurs and even yells behind her, but she ignores it. She quickly freezes the fourth guard, and takes a step towards the Great Wizard. “ Your Greatness, I- “

“I let it slip once, Hecate Hardbroom. No harm was done, and it would be unfortunate to lose a witch of your renown and strength- but I do not tolerate this complete disrespect a second time”

He attempts to cast a spell, and Hecate struggles to deflect it. Not because she lacks the strength- but because he is the embodiment of Tradition. He is everything her father wanted her to respect. Her father’s memory may be corrupted, nothing more than ashes and curse words, but she always clung to his lessons long after he disappointed the entire magical world.

As the Great Wizard prepares to – she is uncertain, her mind struggling to remember what they did to him, what part of the plan succeeded, which penalty he will choose of all the rules she has broken by now- there is a light shimmer, a flash of pink and the Great Wizard pummels over.

She gapes, her eyes flicking from the pitiful form on the floor, to a pink vision, from his hat, to her slightly bruised knuckles.

Pippa chuckles. “ To be completely frank, I have always wanted to do that”

Hecate stares at her. “ How- what- “ she stammers, then grabs her watch tightly. “ That was a violation of- “

“Pretty much the entire Code because – “ she mimics the Great Wizard’s voice whenever he says that (it happens a lot) “ I am the Code”

Hecate is still gaping, approximately a million questions racing through her head when Pippa rushes towards her and grabs her in a tight hug. She decides to focus on how Pippa is alive and warm and gorgeous okay instead of how she just punched the leader of the witching world as though it isn’t treason, honestly.

Pippa pulls back, just enough to gently put out the part of Hecate’s hair that is still smouldering, thanks to Agatha’s spells. “ Why is it that I keep having to punch people for you, Hic- Hecate?”

Hecate feels as though her magic is expanding inside her, growing until she is going to explode , like in the old stories her father used to read her about what would happen to frivolous witches. “ I hardly – “

“ Uh not to interrupt your tearful, sweet reunion, but- “ Dimity points at the window which shows – or rather, not shows- the clear absence of the sun. “I would bet my title as Star of the Sky that that… is not meant to happen”

Hecate and Pippa look at each other. Before Dimity can call out “ hey you’re not the only ones that want to burn her hat through her head” they have already disappeared together.

  It’s Ada.

Agatha is using her, siphoning her magic from her, her injuries healing as rapidly as Ada’s strength diminishes. Hecate throws her away from Ada the second she notices what is happening- or tries to, because the remaining witches working for Ada combine their magic and blast it right back to her.

It is only Pippa’s quick reflexes that save them both. Hecate feels the impact of the spell in her bones, as she is pushed back and feels one of the dozen injuries torn open. She pushes back before the last spell has completely faded, before Pippa can warn her.

This spell rips through the witches defending Agatha, but Hecate stares and swallows back bile as one of them is pulled in front of Agatha, and is almost literally torn apart by her spell. Agatha seems more bored than anything, barely glancing in the direction of the witch as she shrieks and falls to the ground a second later. The others are just as dispassionate, not so much as flinching as they hold their ground in front of the Cackle sisters.

Pippa grabs Hecate’s hand. “ Wait”

“ We do not have time –“

“ If you are going to blindly attack them, you will not help her” Pippa’s grip tightens. “ And both Ada and I would never allow you to sacrifice yourself like that”

Hecate almost transfers away from Pippa. “ Then what do you suggest?”

“ We create a distraction” Pippa deflects spells fired their way, so casually that Hecate is reminded that for all Pippa’s games-and-rainbows attitude to magic, she is one of the most brilliant and powerful witches of her generation. Not that Hecate ever forgets it, she couldn’t, but Pippa hardly ever flaunts her magic.

Pippa lets her wrist go. Hecate glances at her, taking in the thoughtful look. “ Complete focus is necessary for this spell, is it not?”

Hecate inhales sharply. “ If she allows herself to be distracted for even one second- “

“ It might be enough to transfer Ada’s powers back to her”

Pippa nods grimly, presses a quick kiss to Hecate’s cheek. “ You take Ada”

She transfers away before Hecate can even gather her thoughts, appearing in front of one the remaining witches, and using a variant on a simple weather spell to blast the witch back. She lands on the grass, her protective robes steaming. She doesn’t get up, but Pippa only looks grim as she immediately turns to the other four.

She averts her gaze, focuses on Agatha instead. She is still casting, and Hecate takes a step towards her. There is a thick web of protective spells in front of Agatha, and she raises her arms, prepares to use the last of her strength to tear it apart, and take Ada to safety. With every spell she mutters, or flings, the headache gets worse, the air pressing down on her ears until she is grimacing and tempted to wipe away what she suspects is blood.

Finally, the last strand breaks, and she quickly gathers Ada in her arms, preparing to take her away. Instead, she screams in agony as a spell rips into her back, cutting off all feeling from her legs. She and Ada both tumble to the ground.

Agatha laughs, and Hecate tries to get away when she feels the magic rip into her. She understands now; taking Ada’s magic was a trap, meant to enable Agatha to take all the power she needs. Hecate gasps and shudders, trying desperately to throw up barriers but Agatha’s magic tears through them.

She has taken enough from Ada to recover from the duel with Hecate.

Hecate still has remnants of that damnable potion in her system, even after days. On top of that, she has injuries- both physical and magical- as well as exhaustion to battle with. She weakly pushes herself up, grabbing Ada’s arm; she might not be able to transfer both of them, but she has just enough strength left to safe Ada.

She has only one regret. I love you pipsqueak.

She hears Agatha’s laugh at first, the moment Ada’s disappears and she slumps. It has be shortly thereafter that she hears the pained and furious yell, but she sinks into unconsciousness before she can identify it. She hopes she doesn’t wake up; what use is she to anyone if she no longer has magic?

She allows herself to sink deeper, until the pain in her shoulder and head is a distant thrumming, a phantom pain, as she feels herself detaching from her body, floating away- only to be plunged into ice-cold water, torn into her body violently by electric shocks and nails buried into her arm.

Wait, those are actually nails. She stares at them, pink and perfect. She stares into Pippa’s face without breathing, more because she isn’t sure her lungs work properly again then because of her beauty. Because she is gorgeous like this, tears clinging to her lashes, eyes narrowed in concentration and fury, lips muttering spells and cursing at Hecate in equal amount.

She groans when she breaths again, the feeling horrible enough to bring tears to her eyes. Pippa slowly lessens her grip, leaving deep imprints in Hecate’s arm. She rests her forehead against Hecate.

“Take it” she whispers against Hecate’s lips, and Hecate sighs as the pain starts to change, the ice and electricity that made her cry out slowly turning into tingles until even that fades away. It is only when she feels her shoulder healing, a few broken ribs mending, that she realizes it is impossible. Her magic was nearly entirely gone, so how-

Her eyes snap to Pippa’s face, suddenly realizing the familiar brown eyes are hazy and a tint darker than usual  -unfocused, sleepy, as though she is only half-awake- and her skin is at least a shade paler than usual, her chest barely moving-

She screams when Pippa slumps, her forehead landing on Hecate’s shoulder. “ NO “ she yells, her voice breaking. The magic in her, Pippa’s magic, burns as it reacts to her emotions, but she ignores it. Tries to push it towards Pippa. She sits up , forcing her shaking hands to pull Pippa into her lap. She strokes the blond hair, then grabs her shoulder, and tries to push the magic back. It sparks against their skin, hovering in between Hecate’s hands and Pippa’s bruised shoulder, before falling back into Hecate.

She can hardly think. Physically, she is far better but everything in her hurts. She feels like she can breathe less than when there was a rib pushing into her lung, than when her magic was being sucked out of her.

“ Hecate- “ Pippa’s voice is so weak that she only notices when something pushes against her arm. Pippa’s hand drops almost immediately; she clearly doesn’t have the strength to push Hecate away. “Stop. You will hurt yourself” she slurs.

Hecate swallows.  “Pippa Pentangle, you – “

“I know” Pippa murmurs. “ Know, okay? Am an idiot”

“ Pippa, you are going into shock” Hecate’s voice raises an octave. “ Pippa, focus on my voice”

“ Is pretty” Pippa mumbles, her eyes falling closed.

“ Pippa, Pip- Pipsqueak”

“ Hm?”

She barely keeps herself from shaking Pippa, instead grabs her shoulder. “ Pipsqueak” she repeats, her voice breaking.

“ Hm what’s it?”

“ Why?” she chokes out.

Pippa struggles to focus. “You, Ada- you’re a great team”

Hecate only realizes she is crying when she sees a tear fall on Pippa’s face. “ You shouldn’t – you cannot- “

“ Couldn’t have you leave again” Pippa slowly brings her hand to her chest. “ Hurt too much – you’re happy, right? Cackle’s makes you happy?”

Hecate doesn’t understand, what is – “ No, no of course not” she leans in, and she despises herself for how she still cannot say it.

“You will be”

Pippa sounds so certain, as though Hecate ever stopped missing her. As though it wasn’t hard enough when she knew at least Pippa was happy, at least she had a good life now. “ Don’t leave, please” she is surprised how young she sounds. She doesn’t know when she has last sounded and felt so young, and desperate.

At her mother’s funeral, perhaps.

Pippa is still smiling, her chest barely moving. Hecate gently pulls, until Pippa’s forehead is resting against her again. “ I offer you love in friendship, in coven and in soul. I return magic freely given, to once again make you whole”

She closes her eyes, chants it again. Doesn’t hide her love for Pippa, for the first time the others realized what it was, and convinced her that she would only drag Pippa down, make her less. Decided that she would do for Pippa what Pippa could never do herself.

She feels Pippa’s forehead against her, clammy and rapidly cooling. She wraps Pippa more tightly against her body, breathes in and out slowly. Her eyes snap open when she feels Pippa shudder, hears her gasp. She doesn’t stop the chant, keeps it going as Pippa slowly opens her eyes.

“Pipsqueak” she croaks,

Pippa stares at her, long enough that she is starting to pull back. “ Goddess, we are quite the pair, are we not?” she finally says and cuts Hecate of mid-apology. Hecate nearly chokes as Pippa’s way of shutting her up, is to press her lips to Hecate’s.

She pulls back, smiles. “ I felt that, and- “ she shakes her head. “ We wasted so much time”

“I – “ Hecate swallows. “ I did not wish to be a burden to you”

Pippa laughs, rolls her eyes fondly. Cups Hecate’s face between her hands. “Hecate Hardbroom, you impossible dolt. I was in love with you too”

“No, you were not”

“We can argue about this later, and you can apologize to me”

Pippa grins, eyes Hecate in a way that makes her flush all over. “ I have decades of cooking up very elaborate ways that you can make it up to me?”

Hecate decides to save her brain from combustion, and focus on something else. “ If this is true, you also- “

“Oh hush” Pippa says, and kisses her again.

[pamphletstoinspire]

First Sunday in Lent.

Lent (the word “Lent” comes from the Old English “lencten,” meaning “springtime) lasts from Ash Wednesday to the Vespers of Holy Saturday — forty days + six Sundays which don't count as “Lent” liturgically. The Latin name for Lent, Quadragesima, means forty and refers to the forty days Christ spent in the desert which is the origin of the Season.The last two weeks of Lent are known as “Passiontide,” made up of Passion Week and Holy Week. The last three days of Holy Week — Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday — are known as the “Sacred Triduum.”

The focus of this Season is the Cross and penance, penance, penance as we imitate Christ's forty days of fasting, like Moses and Elias before Him, and await the triumph of Easter. We fast (see below), abstain, mortify the flesh, give alms, and think more of charitable works. Awakening each morning with the thought, “How might I make amends for my sins? How can I serve God in a reparative way? How can I serve others today?” is the attitude to have.

We meditate on “The Four Last Things”: Death, Judgment, Heaven, and Hell, and we also practice mortifications by “giving up something” that would be a sacrifice to do without. The sacrifice could be anything from desserts to television to the marital embrace, and it can entail, too, taking on something unpleasant that we'd normally avoid, for example, going out of one's way to do another's chores, performing “random acts of kindness,” etc. A practice that might help some, especially small children, to think sacrificially is to make use of “Sacrifice Beads” in the same way that St. Thérèse of Lisieux did as a child.

Because of the focus on penance and reparation, it is traditional to make sure we go to Confession at least once during this Season to fulfill the precept of the Church that we go to Confession at least once a year, and receive the Eucharist at least once a year during Eastertide. A beautiful old custom associated with Lenten Confession is to, before going to see the priest, bow before each member of your household and to any you've sinned against, and say, “In the Name of Christ, forgive me if I've offended you.” One responds with “God will forgive you.” Done with an extensive examination of conscience and a sincere heart, this practice can be quite healing (also note that confessing sins to a priest is a Sacrament which remits mortal and venial sins; confessing sins to those you've offended is a sacramental which, like all sacramentals one piously takes advantage of, remits venial sins. Both are quite good for the soul!) 

by Abbot Gueranger

This Sunday, the first of the six which come during Lent, is one of the most solemn throughout the year. In common with the other Sundays of Lent, it has the privilege of taking precedence over all feasts, even that of the patron, titular saint, or dedication of the Church. In the ancient calendars, it is called Invocabit, from the first word of the Introit of the Mass. In the middle ages (more especially in France), it was called Brand Sunday, because the young people, who had misbehaved during the carnival, were obliged to show themselves today at the church with a torch in their hands, as a kind of public satisfaction for their causing disturbance and excess.

Lent solemnly opens today. We have already noticed that the four preceding days were added since the time of St. Gregory the Great, in order to make up the forty days of fasting. But we cannot look upon Ash Wednesday as the solemn opening of the season, for the faithful are not strictly bound to hear Mass on that day. Holy Mother Church, seeing Her children now assembled together, speaks to them, in Her Office of Matins, these eloquent and noble words of St. Leo the Great: “Having to announce to you, dearly beloved, the most sacred and chief fast, how can I more appropriately begin, than with the words of the Apostle, in whom Christ Himself spoke, and by saying to you what has just been read: Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation. For although there be no time which is not replete with divine gifts, and we may always, by God's grace, have access to His mercy, yet ought we all to redouble our efforts to make spiritual progress and be animated with extraordinary confidence, now that the anniversary of the day of our redemption is approaching, inviting us to devote ourselves to every good work, that so we may celebrate, with purity of body and mind, the incomparable mystery of Our Lord's Passion.

“It is true that our devotion and reverence towards so great a mystery should be kept up during the whole year, and we ourselves should be at all times, in the eyes of God, the same as we are bound to be at the Easter solemnity. But this is an effort which only few among us have the courage to sustain. The weakness of the flesh induces us to relax our austerities; the various occupations of every-day life take up our thoughts; and thus even the virtuous find their hearts clogged by this world's dust. Hence it is that Our Lord has most providentially given us these forty days, whose holy exercises should be to us a remedy, whereby to regain our purity of soul. The good works and the holy fastings of this season were instituted as an atonement for, and an obliteration of, the sins we commit during the rest of the year.

“Now, therefore, that we are about to enter upon these days, which are so full of mystery, and which were instituted for the holy purpose of purifying both soul and body, let us, dearly beloved, be careful to do as the Apostle bids us, and cleanse ourselves from all defilement of the flesh and of the spirit: that thus the combat between the two substances being made less fierce, the soul, which, when she herself is subject to God, ought to be the ruler of the body, will recover her own dignity and position. Let us also avoid giving offense to any man, so that there be none to blame or speak evil things of us. For we deserve the harsh remarks of infidels, and we provoke the tongues of the wicked to blaspheme religion, when we who fast lead unholy lives. For our fast does not consist in the mere abstinence from food; nor is it of much use to deny food to our body, unless we restrain the soul from sin” (Fourth Sermon for Lent).

Each Sunday of Lent offers to our consideration a passage from the Gospel, which is in keeping with the sentiments wherewith the Church would have us be filled. Today She brings before us the temptation of Our Lord in the desert. What light and encouragement there is for us in the this instruction!

We acknowledge ourselves to be sinners; we are engaged, at this very time, in doing penance for the sins we have committed—but how was it that we fell into sin? The devil tempted us; we did not reject the temptation; then we yielded to the suggestion, and the sin was committed. This is the history of our past; and such it would, also, be for the future, were we not to profit by the lesson given us today by our Redeemer.

When the Apostle speaks of the wonderful mercy shown us by our Divine Savior, Who vouchsafed to make Himself like to us in all things save sin, he justly lays stress on His temptations (Heb. 4: 15). He, Who is very God, humbled Himself even so low as this, to prove how tenderly He compassionated us. Here then, we have the Saint of saints allowing the wicked spirit to approach Him, in order that we might learn, from His example, how we are to gain victory under temptation.

Satan has had his eye upon Jesus; he is troubled at beholding such matchless virtue. The wonderful circumstances of His birth; the shepherds called by angels to His crib, and the Magi guided by the star; the Infant's escape from Herod's plot; the testimony rendered to this new Prophet by John the Baptist: all these things, which seem so out of keeping with the thirty years spent in obscurity at Nazareth, are a mystery to the infernal serpent, and fill him with apprehension. The ineffable mystery of the Incarnation has been accomplished unknown to him; he never once suspects that the humble Virgin, Mary, is She who was foretold by the prophet Isaias, as having to bring forth the Emmanuel (Is. 7: 14); but he is aware that the time has come, that the last week spoken of to Daniel has begun its course, and that the very pagans are looking towards Judea for a deliverer. He is afraid of this Jesus; he resolves to speak with Him, and elicit from Him some expression which will show him whether He be or not the Son of God; he will tempt Him to some imperfection, or sin, which, should He commit it, will prove that the object of so much fear is, after all, but a mortal man.

The enemy of God and men is, of course, disappointed. He approaches Jesus; but all his efforts turn only to his own confusion. Our Redeemer, with all the self-possession and easy majesty of a God-Man, repels the attacks of Satan; but He reveals not His heavenly origin. The wicked spirit retires without having made any discovery beyond this—that Jesus is a prophet, faithful to God. Later on, when he sees the Son of God treated with contempt, calumniated and persecuted; when he finds that his own attempts to have Him put to death are so successful; his pride and his blindness will be at their height; and not till Jesus expires on the Cross, will he learn that his victim was not merely Man, but Man and God. Then will he discover how all his plots against Jesus have but served to manifest, in all their beauty, the mercy and justice of God: His mercy, because He saved mankind; and His justice, because He broke the power of Hell forever.

These were the designs of Divine Providence in permitting the wicked spirit to defile, by his presence, the retreat of Jesus, to speak to Him, and to lay his hands upon Him. But let us attentively consider the triple temptation in all its circumstances; for our Redeemer suffered it only in order that He might instruct and encourage us.

We have three enemies to fight against; our soul has three dangers; for, as the beloved disciple says, all that is in the world, is the concupiscence of the flesh, and the concupiscence of the eyes, and the pride of life! (1 John 2: 16) By the concupiscence of the flesh, is meant the love of sensual things, which covets whatever is agreeable to the flesh, and, when not curbed, draws the soul into unlawful pleasures. Concupiscence of the eyes expresses the love of the goods of this world, such as riches and possessions; these dazzle the eye, and then seduce the heart. Pride of life is that confidence in ourselves, which leads us to be vain and presumptuous, and makes us forget that all we have, our life and every good gift, we have from God.

Every one of our sins comes from one of these three sources; every one of our temptations aims at making us accept the concupiscence of the flesh, or the concupiscence of the eyes, or the pride of life. Our Savior, then, Who willed to be our Model in all things, deigned to subject Himself to these three temptations.

First of all Satan tempts Him in what regards the flesh: he suggests to Him to satisfy the cravings of hunger by working a miracle, and changing the stones into bread. If Jesus were to consent, and show an eagerness in giving this indulgence to His Body, the tempter will conclude that He is a frail mortal, subject to concupiscence like other men. When he tempts us, who have inherited evil concupiscence from Adam, his suggestions go further that this: he endeavors to defile the soul by the body. But the sovereign holiness of the Incarnate Word could never permit Satan to use upon Him the power which he has received of tempting man in his outward senses. The lesson, therefore, which the Son of God here gives us, is one of temperance; but we know that, for us, temperance is the mother of purity, and that intemperance excites our senses to rebel.

The second temptation is to pride: “Cast Thyself down; the angels shall bear Thee up in their hands.” The enemy is anxious to see if the favors of Heaven have produced in Jesus' soul that haughtiness, that ungrateful self-confidence, which makes the creature arrogate God’s gifts to itself, and forget its Benefactor. Here, also, he is foiled; our Redeemer’s humility confounds the pride of the rebel angel.

He then makes a last effort: he hopes to gain over by ambition Him Who has given such proofs of temperance and humility. He shows Him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; and says to Him: “All these will I give Thee, if falling down, Thou wilt adore me.” Jesus rejects the wretched offer, and drives from Him the seducer, the prince of this world (John 14: 30); hereby teaching us that we must despise the riches of this world, as often as our keeping or getting them is to be on the condition of our violating the law of God and thereby paying homage to Satan.

But let us observe how it is that our Divine Model, our Redeemer, overcomes the tempter. Does He hearken to his words? Does He allow the temptation time, and give it strength by delay? We did so, when we were tempted; and we fell. But Our Lord immediately meets each temptation with the shield of God's Word. He says: “It is written: Not on bread alone doth man live. It is written: Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God. It is written: The Lord thy God shalt thou adore, and Him only shalt thou serve.” This, then, must be our practice for the time to come. Eve brought perdition on herself, and on the whole human race, because she listened to the serpent. He that dallies with temptation is sure to fall. We are now in a season of extraordinary grace; our hearts are on the watch, dangerous occasions are removed, everything that savors of worldliness is laid aside; our souls, purified by prayer, fasting, and almsdeeds, are to rise with Christ to a new life; but shall we persevere? All depends upon how we behave under temptation. Here, at the very opening of Lent, the Church gives us this passage of the holy Gospel, that we may have not only precept but example. If we be attentive and faithful, the lesson She gives us will produce its fruit; and when we come to the Easter solemnity, we shall have those sure pledges of perseverance: vigilance, self-diffidence, prayer, and the never-failing help of divine grace.

The Greek Church, in spite of her principle of never admitting a feast during Lent, celebrates today one of her greatest solemnities. It is called Orthodoxia, and was instituted in memory of the restoration of sacred images in Constantinople and the eastern empire, in the year 842, when the Empress Theodora (image at left), aided by the holy patriarch Methodius, put a stop to the Iconoclast persecution, and restored to the churches the holy images which the fury of the heretics had taken away.

The Station for the Mass at Rome is the patriarchal basilica of St. John Lateran. It was but right that a Sunday of such solemnity as this should be celebrated in the church which is the mother and mistress of all churches, not only of the holy city itself, but of the whole world. It is here that the public penitents would be reconciled on Maundy Thursday; it is here also, in the Baptistry of Constantine, that the catechumens would receive Baptism on the night of the Easter Vigil. No other basilica could have had such a claim for the Station of a day like this; for it is there that the Lenten Fast had been so often proclaimed by Saints Leo and Gregory.

The Introit, Gradual, Tract, Offertory and Communion are all taken from Psalm 90. We have elsewhere spoken of the appropriateness of this beautiful psalm to the spirit of the Church during the season of Lent. It bids the Christian soul to confide in the divine aid. She is now devoting her whole energies to prayer; she is engaged in battle with her own and God’s enemies. She has need of support. Let her not be afraid, God tells her; she is under His protection as well as that of the holy angels. It was this passage that Satan attempted to abuse in his second temptation:

He shall cry to Me and I will hear him: I will deliver him, and I will glorify him: I will fill him with length of days. He that dwelleth in the aid of the Most High, shall abide under the protection of the God of Heaven… God hath given His angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. In their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone…

In the Collect, the Church prays for Her children, that their fast may not only purify them, but also obtain for them that divine assistance, which will secure their salvation by enabling them to abound in good works:

O God, Who dost purify Thy Church by the yearly observance of Lent: grant to Thy family that what we try to obtain of Thee by abstinence, we may secure by good works. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ…

There follows a Lesson from the sixth chapter of the Second Epistle of St. Paul to the Corinthians:

Brethren: We entreat you not to receive the grace of God in vain. For He says, “In an acceptable time I have heard thee, and in the day of salvation I have helped thee.” Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation! We give no offense to anyone, that our ministry may not be blamed. On the contrary, let us conduct ourselves in all circumstances as God's ministers, in much patience; in tribulations, in hardships, in distresses; in stripes, in imprisonments, in tumults; in labors, in sleepless night, in fastings; in innocence, in knowledge, in long-sufferings; in kindness, in the Holy Ghost, in unaffected love; in the word of truth, in the power of God; with the armor of justice on the right had and on the left; in honor and dishonor, in evil report and good report; as deceivers and yet truthful, as unknown and yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as chastised but not killed; as sorrowful yet always rejoicing; as poor yet enriching many; as having nothing yet possessing all things.

These words of the Apostle give us a very different idea of the Christian life from that which our own tepidity suggests. We dare not say that he is wrong and we are right; but we put a strange interpretation upon his words, and we tell both ourselves and those around us that the advice he here gives is not to be taken literally nowadays, and that it was written for those special difficulties of the first age of the Church, when the faithful stood in need of unusual detachment and almost heroism, because they were always in danger of persecution and death. This interpretation is full of that discretion which meets with the applause of our cowardice, and it easily persuades us to be at rest, just as though we had no dangers to fear, and no battle to fight; whereas we have both; for there is the devil, the world, flesh and blood. The Church never forgets it; and hence, at the opening of this great season, She sends us into the desert, that there we may learn from our Jesus how we are to fight. Let us go; let us learn from the temptations of our Divine Master that the life of man upon earth is a warfare (Job 7: 1), and that, unless our fighting be truceless and brave, our life, which we would fain pass in peace, will witness our defeat. That such a misfortune may not befall us, the Church cries out to us, in the words of St. Paul: Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation! Let us, in all things, comport ourselves as the servants of God, and keep our ground unflinchingly to the end of our holy campaign. God is watching over us, as He did over His beloved Son in the desert.

The Holy Gospel is taken from the fourth chapter of St. Matthew:

At that time, Jesus was led into the desert by the Spirit, to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, He was hungry. And the tempter came and said to Him, “If Thou art the Son of God, command that these stones become loaves of bread.” But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Not by bread alone does man live, but by every words that comes forth from the mouth of God'.” Then the devil took Him into the holy city and set Him on the pinnacle of the temple, and said to Him, “If Thou art the Son of God, throw Thyself down; for it is written, ‘He has given His angels charge concerning Thee; and upon their hands they shall bear Thee up, lest Thou dash Thy foot against a stone'.” Jesus said to him, “It is written further, ‘Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God'.” Again, the devil took Him to a very high mountain, and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and the glory of them. And he said to Him, “All these things will I give Thee, if Thou wilt fall down and worship me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Begone, Satan, for it is written, ‘The Lord thy God shalt thou worship and Him only shalt thou serve'.” Then the devil left Him; and behold, angels came and ministered to Him.

Let us admire the exceeding goodness of the Son of God, Who, not satisfied with atoning for all our sins by dying on the Cross, deigns to suffer a fast of forty days and forty nights, in order to encourage us to do penance. He would not that the justice of His heavenly Father should exact any punishment from us, unless He Himself first suffered it, and that too, a thousand times more severely than we could. What are all our penances, even were they done thoroughly, when we compare them with the severity of this fast of Jesus in the desert? Can we dare to be ever asking for dispensations from the little which Our Lord asks of us in atonement for our sins, which deserve such rigorous penance? Instead of complaining at our feeling a slight inconvenience of a few days' duration, let us compassionate our innocent Jesus, Who subjects Himself to forty days of most rigorous privation of food and drink.

What was it that supported Him? Prayer, devotedness to us, and the knowledge of the exigencies of His Father's justice. And when the forty days were over, and His human Nature was faint from exhaustion, He is assailed by temptation; but here again He thinks of us, and sets us an example: He triumphs over the temptation, calmly and resolutely, and thereby teaches us how to conquer. How blasphemous the boldness of Satan, who dares to tempt the Just One! But how divine is the patience of Jesus, Who permits the hellish monster to lay his hand upon Him, and carry Him from place to place!

The Christian soul is oftentimes exposed to the vilest insults from this same enemy; nay, at times, she is on the point of complaining to her God, for permitting her to have such humiliations. Let her, on these occasions, think upon Jesus, the Saint of saints, Who was given over, so to speak, to the wicked spirit; and yet, He is not the less the Son of God, the Conqueror of Hell; and all that Satan gains by his attack is utter defeat. In the same way, if the soul, when under the violence of temptation, resists with all her energy, she is not one jot less dear to God, and Satan retires with one more eternal shame and chastisement upon him.

Let us take part with the holy angels, who, as soon as the tempter is gone, come to our Redeemer, and respectfully administer food to Him. How affectionately do they compassionate His hunger and thirst! How zealously they make amends, by their adorations, for the frightful outrage the charity of their God, Who, out of His love for man, seems to have been forgetting His own dignity, in order to provide for the wants of the children of Adam. 

by Fr. Francis Xavier Weninger, 1876

Then Jesus said to him: Be gone, Satan!”–Matt. 4 : 10.

There is but one evil, and that is sin. This evil has many different paths by which it approaches us. These paths are called temptations. It is true that of themselves temptations can not injure us. On the contrary, Holy Writ says: “Blessed is the man that endureth, for when he hath been proved he shall receive the crown of life, which God hath promised to them that love Him.” All depends upon our withstanding them, and to be able to do this we must heed the admonition of Christ, we must watch and especially guard ourselves against those temptations through which Satan most frequently approaches man.

There are in particular three temptations to which today's Gospel refers, and to which a large portion of mankind fall victims; the three temptations, namely, with which Satan dared to tempt Christ, our Lord, Himself.

Let us see, today, what sort of temptations these are. Mary, thou mighty stronghold against the hosts of the tempter, give us thy assistance, that we may come forth victorious from the fight! I speak in the most holy name of Jesus, to the greater glory of God!

And the tempter approaching Him, said: “Command that these stones be made bread!” To what temptation do these words refer? I say to that temptation with which Satan assaults man when he enters upon life–the immoderate care for the goods of this world. It is the temptation of excessive labor, and anxiety after a business profession in order to gain a position in society. Yes, for a great number, even for many who otherwise seem to live piously, this is the net which entangles them in numberless temptations.

This regard for the world frequently causes men to forget their last aim and end. Instead of thinking only of what is requisite; for salvation, and pursuing it with their whole heart and the entire strength of their will, they live altogether for earthly things, and think seriously of nothing else. This worldly care extinguishes all their longing after perfection, and causes them to neglect those means of divine grace which are placed within their reach.

The man who is a prey to this inordinate care begins the day without prayer, and without a right intention; he neglects Mass, pious reading, and the holy Sacraments. His excuse is that his business leaves him no time for devotion, while in his intercourse with the world temptations approach him by countless roads. He hopes to satisfy the cravings of his heart with temporal wealth and pleasures; he expects to change the hard and tasteless stones of worldly enjoyment into bread which will nourish his soul but he is mistaken.

These perverse sentiments of the heart open wide the gate to all kinds of temptations; egotism, envy, anger, enmity, intemperance, deceit and injustice enter, and the wretched man endeavors to serve two masters, God and the world. But the world, at last, completely ensnares him, and, instead of conquering temptation, he is vanquished by it.

Satan said to Jesus after he had carried Him to the pinnacle of the temple: “Cast thyself down !” To what temptation do these words refer? To that dangerous state of the heart which causes man through presumption to fall a victim of his own foolhardiness.

And how? He neither fears God, nor the possibility of committing sin; he trusts in himself too much, and thinks that there is no danger of his swerving from the right path, and, while thus feeling secure, instead of avoiding temptation, he runs into it.

To this class of tempted persons belong those who are satisfied with being nominal children of the true Church, and who think that, because they are members of that Church out of whose pale there is no salvation, they will, without doubt, gain heaven. In a word, they are strangers to that fear of which St. Paul speaks when he says: “Work your salvation with fear and trembling.” To such people Satan need not go, they themselves seek him!

To this class belong also those who, in the selection of their place of business or their home, pay no attention to facilities for hearing Mass and receiving the Sacraments.

Finally, to this class belong those who are addicted to drinking, visiting bar-rooms, gambling; those who think only of pleasure, frequent dangerous company, read immoral books, and imagine that all this, in reality, has no evil consequences, and will not lead them into sin. Woe to these! They love the danger and will perish in it.

Lastly, Satan showed to Christ from the summit of a mountain all the kingdoms of the world, and said to Him: “All these will I give Thee if, falling down, thou wilt adore me.” What temptation is this? It is the temptation of self-love, of vanity, of pride in all its forms, a sin which deprives even virtuous actions of their merit. It is that self-adoration which causes man, even in a life devoted to piety, to seek more his own honor than the honor of God.

And yet how small, how trivial, is the honor which the world can give to man. Even were it to bestow all its glory and applause; how infinitely small would this be, when compared to God and the kingdom which He has promised and will give us! Those who are convinced of this truth will doubtless meet the tempter with an energetic: “Be gone!”

But it is in this determination, in this energy, that man is most deficient. Were this not the case, did he not waver, Satan would not hope, by again and again renewing his temptations, to succeed in the end; he would not even dare to tempt us. He knows well that he can do us no harm by tempting us, provided we remain firm, but that, on the contrary, he would only give us occasions to merit and adorn our crown of victory with jewels of virtue. St. Ignatius says: “Courage on our part discourages Satan.” If, however, he sees that we are in the least inclined to yield, then he is most persevering, and, tempting us again and again, attacks us on all sides and in all possible ways. Perceiving that he does not succeed in one attempt and through the instrumentality of one person, he makes a second attempt and seeks more efficient auxiliaries. He knows from experience how to undermine the foundation of great virtues and destroy them.

The one thing which frightens him and causes him to retreat is a decided: “Be gone!” In order, however, to feel strong and resolute, we must think daily and continually on the certainty of death, and on judgment, which one day will decide whether we are to dwell for evermore in heaven or in hell. If in temptation we turn to our crucified Saviour, and, making the sign of the cross, call on Jesus with the lips and the heart, Satan will flee, victory will be ours, and angels approaching us will console us with sweet thoughts of heaven! Amen!

“And the tempter coming, said to Him.”–Matt. 4 : 3.

God wills that all men should be saved, as St. Paul assures us, and Lent reminds us emphatically of the truth of these words. Many of the mysteries of the life of Christ, to which the Church refers during Lent in the Gospels at Mass, are evidences that Christ came into the world to teach men how to live in order to gain salvation, especially the mysteries of His apostolic life, which ended with His suffering and death upon the cross.

God, it is true, allows Satan to tempt us, but only in order to prove our fidelity, and to recompense us the more in the world to come. If men fail in this trial of liberty, then they have not employed the means God offers them to issue victorious from the strife. What means are these? A glance at the manner in which the: Church observes Lent will answer this question.

Mary, Mother of the elect, pray for us that we may be of the number of those who stand victoriously the test of temptation! I speak in the most holy name of Jesus, to the greater glory of God!

At the commencement of Lent the Church puts ashes upon the heads of her children, saying: “Remember, man, that thou art dust, and that into dust thou shalt return.” The Church desires to keep the thought of the certainty and proximity of death alive in the hearts of her children. One of the chief reasons why so many souls, though ransomed by the blood of Christ, are lost, is their incomprehensible forgetfulness of death. If all men possessed that consciousness of death of which the Apostle speaks, and remembered its certainty, its nearness, they would never be lost for eternity. What is it that generally leads men into temptation and takes from them all strength and courage to withstand it?

His sinful inclinations, his desire for the goods, honors, and pleasures of this world, together with the forgetfulness of the certainty and nearness of death. Oh, that all men would each morning put ashes on their heads in spirit, and repeat the words of the Church on Ash Wednesday: Remember that thou art dust, and that to dust thou shalt return. Think that this day is perhaps your last! How many of those who in the morning go bright and happy to their labor, are brought home at night corpses! If this should be the case with you, what then? As ashes placed upon burning coals deaden and even extinguish their glow, so this recollection will reduce and stifle the fire of passion.

If men would occasionally take a solitary ramble in some cemetery, and thus awaken within themselves the recollection of the certainty and nearness of death, they would gain strength for the fight against temptations of selfishness, ambition, and worldliness. How wealth, honors, and pleasures lose their attraction in the silent cities of the dead! Smoke they are and vapor, viewed from the brink of the grave.

Is it not astonishing to see how anxious men are to render their condition in life as favorable to ease and comfort as possible, how careful they are to evade anything that might endanger their welfare in this world? They never give a thought to the shortness and uncertainty of this life, to the dangers that always hang over their heads; they do not consider that daily and hourly men die, and that soon they, too, must say to themselves: My turn has come.

They hear and know that nothing is so sure, nothing as inevitable as death, and yet as a saint of latter times, the blessed Hofbauer, whose canonization is now in progress, said: “Men know that they must die, and yet they do not believe it, but live as if this life were the only one they would ever possess, the only one for which they need care. Hence their negligence in all that pertains to their salvation, and hence also their eternal destruction.”

The Church requires her children during Lent to mortify themselves by observing the laws prescribed for this season. She not only demands of them to abstain from meat and partake of only one meal a day, but she desires above all to awaken and strengthen in their hearts the spirit of self-abnegation. Holy Writ says: “The life of man upon earth is a warfare.” To conduct it properly and victoriously we must follow the admonition of Christ and mortify our selves.

The second cause of so many being lost is the want of the true spirit of repentance, and self-humiliation. Christ sent His Apostles as missionaries into the world with this message: Tell the people that if they do not repent they shall all perish. And St. Paul says: “And they who are Christ's have crucified their flesh with its vices and concupiscences.” Man craves happiness; while here below he wishes to enjoy the pleasures of an earthly paradise, and hopes one day to share, besides, the joys of heaven.

How many there are to whom the reproach of the Apostle may be justly addressed: “Whose god is their belly!” The desire of pleasure and excitement leads man into temptation, and causes him to indulge sinful inclinations, to commit mortal sin, and so lose eternal life.

The Church exhorts her children to live in retirement and meditation during Lent, and to devote more time to prayer and religious exercises. Why are so many souls lost even among the children of the Church? I answer, because they have not the spirit of prayer and contemplation, because they have not recourse to pious books for holy thoughts. Men live thoughtlessly, and do not take time to say a daily prayer or think with recollected minds of God and the eternal truth of His Word. They do not reflect or meditate upon what they believe. They do not reduce to practice the teachings of their faith, but live, although members of the Church, like Pagans. It is for this reason that Christians as well as heathens are lost. Jeremias has said: “With desolation is the land made desolate; because there is none that considereth in the heart.” Would to God that this reproach could not be referred to Christians!

St. Teresa says: “I fear not for a soul who prays.” But how few really pray while they are going through their devotions! Only too many deserve the reproach of the Lord: “This people honoreth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.” We either pray not at all, or fail in the manner, frequency, and perseverance of our aspirations to God, especially in time of temptation. Hence so many are powerless to resist the attacks of passion, and miserably fall.

The Church desires that her children, during Lent, should frequently and attentively hear the word of God and endeavor to profit by it. All, however, do not listen to her. But too many read their reproach and their condemnation in the words of Christ to the Jews. Christ Himself reproaches them, saying: “You hear not the words of God, because you are not of God.”

There are many Christians who, throughout the year, never hear a sermon, or who, if they hear one, listen to it not as to the word of God, and as if God Himself were addressing them, but regard it merely in its human element; hence their indifference to profit by it for the life to come, and hence also their eternal destruction.

The Church wishes her children to meditate, especially during Lent, upon the passion and death of Christ, in order that the love of the cross may fill their hearts. Christ says: “He who will follow me must take up his cross daily;” and the Holy Ghost: “In your patience you shall possess your souls.”

How many Christians neither love nor esteem the cross! yet they must endure the trials and afflictions of life. Their aversion to suffering only makes their burden heavier and more irksome. Murmuring against the decrees of Providence, they carry their cross as did the thief who was crucified at the left of our Lord. They forget that they can only enter the abode of the blessed by following Christ who walked before us the road of the cross to open for us the gates of heaven. Hence their weakness and faithlessness under trials and tribulations; hence, too, their eternal destruction.

The Church further desires her children during Lent to confess their sins and receive the Most Blessed Sacrament devoutly and worthily. That all do not comply with this wish, is evident from the fact, that the Church, to our great shame, has been obliged to give the following precept: “Confess your sins at least once a year to a priest duly authorized, and receive holy Communion at Easter or thereabout.”

They are in the greatest danger of making it the occasion of still greater evil. People who can only be prevailed upon by the most positive order to have recourse to the Sacraments, run a great risk of receiving them unworthily. Human respect may drive them to the confessional and the holy table:, but the chances are that they return from them more wicked, more laden with guilt than before.

Were the children of the Church to receive the Sacraments frequently and worthily, the consoling words of Christ would be fulfilled in them: “He that eateth My flesh, and drinketh My blood, hath everlasting life;” he “abideth in Me and I in him.” Yet how many men neglect to receive the blessed Sacrament, or else receive it without preparation or unworthily. This is the cause of the loss of many souls among Christians. Therefore, let us live, not only during Lent, but all our days, in the spirit in which the Church observes Lent, and let us practise those pious exercises which she recommends in order that after the Good-Friday of our life here below, we may celebrate Easter in the joys of life everlasting! Amen!  

[dailyaudiobible]

07/12/2021

1 Chronicles 12:19-14:17, Romans 1:1-17, Psalm 9:13-20, Proverbs 19:4-5

Today is the 12th day of July, welcome to the Daily Audio Bible, I am Brian it is wonderful to be here with you today as we get going in our new work week and actually we have new territory. We finish the Book of Acts yesterday. So, when we get to the New Testament portion we’ll be moving into totally new category and so we'll talk about when we get there but first we’re reading from the Christian Standard Bible this week, 1 Chronicles chapter 12 verse 19 through 14 verse 17.

Introduction to Romans:

Okay, so as I mentioned at the beginning, we concluded the Book of Acts yesterday. Acts is generally thought of as New Testament history and so in concluding the Book of Acts yesterday we earned our New Testament history badge for kind of keeping track in the Daily Audio Bible app. And so, now we’re moving into some new territory. We left the Book of Acts with Paul arriving in Rome. And so, the last part of the Book of Acts we were really right alongside the Apostle Paul, as he journeyed around and all the controversies that arose in his travels around the Roman Empire bringing the good news of the gospel. We went to Jerusalem and we saw him get arrested and we saw the appeal to Caesar and so he's sailed to Rome and that's the end of the Book of Acts. We will spend the next generous portion of our time through the year here working through the letters that Paul wrote that have been preserved that Paul had sent directly to different churches that had been established to encourage and instruct them. And what we need to understand is yes, currently at the moment we are reading the New Testament and these letters are included in the New Testament of the Bible. But when these letters were written there wasn't a New Testament to include them in. And so, these letters were copied and passed around from church to church. Descriptions of early church would be to sing a hymn to have a meal together to maybe read from the prophets or to read from the law from the Mosaic law, the law and the prophets. Or to read the Chronicles of the apostles or to read some of these letters and over time they were collected together and now we have them in the New Testament so we’ll be spending time in Paul's letters. He's not the only one that wrote letters that ended up in the New Testament but Paul's letters, they are grouped together and we’re gonna move through them at once. And another thing to understand is that we've read Matthew, Mark, Luke and John we've read the Gospels, that's how we got going, that's where we spent the first half of our year in the Gospels. These letters though, were written before the Gospels were written and so, these letters some of them are the earliest Christian writings that exist. So, today were going to move into the book of Romans and this is the first, like I said, many of the letters that Paul wrote in the New Testament. But this is the first one that we’re coming to and most scholars agree this is like the crown jewel, this is the very comprehensive work that provides an incredible amount of our theological understanding of Jesus and his work and what it represents. This letter was probably written from the city of Corinth where the Corinthians were, some of Paul's strongest missionary work was performed in Corinth and so this was probably written from there, probably somewhere in the mid-50s. And I don’t mean like the 1550s or the 1950s, I mean like the 50s like the 0050 length of 50s. And this is one of the more lengthy letters of Paul. And so, when he finished it, at least according to the book of Romans, he sent a Deaconess, her name was Phoebe, to hand deliver the letter. Phoebe was from the church Incontraia and that was like a suburb of Corinth. In this case Paul is sending a letter to the church in Rome. But this is not, Paul had never been to Rome so he didn't plant the church in Rome and nobody really knows who did or how the gospel made its way to Rome other, we remember that Stephen was stoned and then people began to run. People began to spread out looking for freedom in a peaceful way to live and to avoid, kind of, marginalization and persecution. And so, you know, a likely scenario, probably the likely scenario is it, that's how the gospel got to Rome, somebody or group of people who had been present with what the Holy Spirit was doing at Pentecost and in the church in Jerusalem, ended up carrying the message back to Rome and eventually a church was established there. So, Paul was a naturally born Roman citizen. He hadn't been to Rome but he was looking forward to it. We know the story, he went to Jerusalem, got arrested and then made his way to Rome as a prisoner and we’ve watched all that and we’ve watched you know, the Sanhedrin, against Paul plan to assassinate, assassination plots are unearthed, and Paul is rescued and saved in we've seen the difference between the Sadducees and the Pharisees when Paul has addressed them. We've seen all that's coming against Paul everywhere he goes, like he can't really hardly get to a new city without the Jewish people stirring up some kind a mob against him so, he has this reputation and we look at that, we may think like “okay, yeah, this is this is how they treated Jesus, this is how they treat Paul, this is how they treat everybody” but we me wonder like what's going on here? Why are they so mad at Paul, why were they so mad at Jesus for that matter? As we move through the book of Romans we’ll be able to explore some of that, begin to understand why this good news was a controversy, why it was thought of as a heresy even, why it was thought of as like an anti-God thing, this is why the Sanhedrin, other than just to stay in power, lie they’re raging against somebody like Paul because they cannot get their minds around what he's saying and we’ll begin to be able to understand the lay of the land there as we move through the book or letter of Romans. And so let's get started, Romans chapter 1 verses 1 through 17 today.

Prayer:

Father, we thank You for Your word. We thank You for bringing us into this new territory. And as we begin the Book of Romans and start our journey through these letters these very, very, the earliest of preserved writings that were centered around the story of the good news of the gospel, we invite Your Holy Spirit to lead and guide us to open our eyes to see and open our ears to hear and we might understand the implications of the Gospel and how much it actually changes things for we who believe. Come, Holy Spirit into this next season that we will share together in the letters of Paul. We pray this in Jesus’ name. Amen.

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And that's it for today I'm Brian, I love you and I'll be waiting for you here tomorrow.

Prayers and Encouragements:

Hey my amazing DAB fam, this is Kingdom Seeker Daniel. To the unnamed brother, you’re battling unforgiveness and you find it hard to let go sins of the past. John 8:36 simply tells us, my friend, if the son sets you free you will be freed indeed. So, my brother, if you have accepted Jesus Christ as Lord and Savior and repented of your sin, you are free indeed. You simply have to walk that out and so sometimes I know that the stumbling blocks and the snares and the pitfalls of the enemy wants to try to remind us. That's all he can do though is just try to remind us. We’ve got to press, set our affections and our mind on things above so you are free. So, let's just keep pressing forward. Father lift up your son. I pray that You would cause him to remember who he is in You in the name of Jesus. And then for Ava from Colorado Springs, God I’m asking that You would be with her and the six children that will have to testify concerning this sex abuse court hearing. What would You give her and the children the ability to speak the truth and give them the strength to declare what needs to be declared and I pray that Your Spirit would govern all of these matters in Jesus name. Kirah, oh my goodness, thank you for your testimony this contrite in Jesus, hallelujah, thank you so much woman of God for that powerful testimony. Love you family.  

Hello Daily Audio Bible family. I am missionary from Chicago calling in asking for prayer. I am the sole caregiver for an elderly mom suffering from dementia. I’ve been a sole caregiver going on two years now when she moved in with me and if you’ve ever dealt with someone with dementia, you know it's very unpredictable but every day just gets a little bit harder and harder as the disease progresses, as well as just the pressure and the stress on caregivers. And I’ve just noticed the last few months my patience has decreased and my stress levels and kind of, frustrations with the situation that I'm in has only increased so I'm just asking for prayer. Prayer for my mom first and foremost that she will just continue to have all of the positive aspects of her personality and hold onto as much as herself for as long as she can. But also just prayers for me as I try to get more patience and kindness and less frustration and anger about the situation and that I can just be surrounded by guidance and support and just increased faith and perseverance for the situation that we’re in. Thank you very much for your prayers. I know God is listening and it's also so comforting to know that all of you all are are listening and praying for me as well. Thank you.

Hey from beautiful Cincinnati, Ohio it's Daniel Johnson Junior this goes out to Margo the missionary from Australia and Liberia and your husband oh my goodness you guys are going through a lot. I mean, we hear about how hard things have been with the pandemic in Africa and India and South America and I know you're there among it all and as you say you’re feeling some compassion fatigue. And I can't even imagine what that’s like. So, I just, my heart goes out to you Margo, I pray for respite for you and your husband. I pray for renewed renewal through Jesus through the Spirit of Jesus that may rest in you and on you, but you may continue to do God's work and until it's time for you to not do it there anymore so may God continue to provide for you and to bless you, our sister. You are one of our heroes in this community and we love you and you're definitely one of God's favorites. God bless you from beautiful Cincinnati, Ohio, Daniel Johnson Junior.

Hi, I just wanted to call in for this girl that was struggling at a hospital at Africa. I don’t really know her name, Margo, is her name from Liberia. That’s what my Aunt Rachel told me. And I just want you to help her God and please help good people to come in the hospital and help. Please help there not to be anymore bad people there. Please help the people to get better and there to be miracles. My name is Kailee. Hi, I’m Jaylyn and I wanted to pray for the same girl with my sister. I’m here with my sister and my cousin Benice and my Aunt and I wanted to pray for this girl Margo in Africa for there to be good people at her hospital and for them to get money to help those people and I just wanna pray for them and yeah. Hi, I’m Ben. I’m Big Hearted Ben I’m going to help Margo to have a good life and help the people in need. And to get and to help everyone, Amen. Bye.

Hey Daily Audio Bible family this is Billy from Montgomery with the Trinity Stone. I wanted to put a prayer request out there for Margo from Australia now it’s Margo from Liberia. You started, ya’ll went back to do mission work in Liberia, and I just, ya’ll sounded like ya’ll were having issues with things that were going on over there. I just wanted to wash y'all in the blood of Jesus and let ya’ll know that I was praying for y'all and keep ya’ll covered up in prayer. It sounded like ya’ll were really having issues with things that were going on over there. I just wanted to let you know I was covering, keeping you guys covered in prayer and I will talk you later. Alrighty. Bye for now.

[marksburyscripts]

Season 1, Episode 7-- Reappearance

Google Doc

Content Warnings: -Past parental death -Cancer

[A local farm in Marksbury. Day.]

CHRISTINE

This place is nice.

VICTOR

Yeah. We used to take field trips here all the time when we were kids. Learn how to milk cows, how to plant seeds, all that stuff. If we came during the fall, we'd paint pumpkins. Elliot and I actually took horseback riding lessons here when we were eight. 

CHRISTINE

Oh yeah?

VICTOR 

Mhm. There was this one horse. Sierra was her name, if I remember correctly. She always gave everyone a hard time. Nothing dangerous, obviously, just not wanting to cooperate. Figure she must have been bored of a bunch of kids tugging on her reins all day. But Elliot, the moment he sat up there, it was like she'd known him her whole life. 

CHRISTINE

He sounds wonderful. 

VICTOR 

He was.

CHRISTINE

Do you have a picture of him? 

VICTOR

I… yeah. Here.

[There is a beat as he pulls up the photo]

CHRISTINE

And the one in the hockey shirt is Henry, I'm assuming? 

VICTOR

Yeah. This was right after one of his games senior year of high school. They won.

CHRISTINE

He's wearing your sweatshirt. 

VICTOR

Well-- Technically it's his. He let me keep it though, I…. I haven't really taken it off unless it was for laundry or to sleep, not since he…. [A breath] 

CHRISTINE

No, I get it. You all look really happy.

VICTOR

...I still don't understand it, you know.

CHRISTINE 

Understand what?

VICTOR

You. Clearly you're on… Erik's side, why bother with me?

CHRISTINE

I'm not on anyone's side. You know as well as I do that he has a tendency to get violent. If he decides that he wants to come after you, I might be the only person who can change his mind. It’s not a decision I made lightly, my fiance and I talked long and hard about it. Weighed all the pros and cons, the risks and benefits.

VICTOR

Hold on, you’re--

CHRISTINE

Mhm. He and I were childhood sweethearts. He proposed not long after I graduated.

VICTOR

Can’t imagine that went over well with your secret admirer.

CHRISTINE

No, it didn’t.

VICTOR

And so what? Your fiance is just… okay with you moving six hours away and keeping an eye on someone who’s basically a stranger so that your kidnapper doesn’t murder him?

CHRISTINE

In short? Yes. We trust the other can hold their own if things do go south. But honestly, I don’t think Raoul or I have to worry about Erik.

VICTOR

...So at the end of the day, you've decided that you're my bodyguard whether I like it or not.

CHRISTINE

It sounds better than "Friend with benefits".

VICTOR [He laughs] 

Now you just sound like Henry.

CHRISTINE 

Is that a good thing?

VICTOR

Yeah. Yeah, it is.

CHRISTINE

I'd love to meet him someday.

VICTOR

I’d have to check with him on that. Not sure he’d love the idea of….

CHRISTINE

My connections?

VICTOR

Exactly. It’s not that he’s a bad person or anything, he just--

[Very faintly, almost overlapping his words, there is a soft, nearly inaudible humming in the distance]

VICTOR (Cont.)

Did-- Did you hear that?

CHRISTINE

...Hear what?

VICTOR

...Nothing. Nothing, sorry.

CHRISTINE

...Are you okay?

VICTOR

I think we both know the answer to that.

CHRISTINE

You know what I mean. 

VICTOR

...Yeah. Yeah, I'm fine.

CHRISTINE

Can I ask you something?

VICTOR

I have a feeling you're going to find out the answer one way or another, so go for it.

CHRISTINE

What inspired you? What gave you the idea to--

VICTOR

To make a person, commit arson, and drop out of school?

CHRISTINE

A little more blunt than I was going for, but yes.

VICTOR

Yeah, no offense, but I'd rather not get into it.

[There are a few seconds of quiet as Victor debates whether or not to continue]

VICTOR (Cont.)

...My mom died. Cancer. I was seventeen, just a couple days out of high school. We'd always been close, so losing her, it… it was devastating. Not just for me, obviously. My dad, my sister…. My brother was five at the time, he didn't even really understand what was happening. That she was gone, that she wouldn't be coming back. Unless… she did. Unless she did come back.  I'd always had the interest in the subject. I already had theories, but they'd always been just that. Theories, curiosity. "Is this the secret to piercing through the veil that separates life and death?" Little more than a hypothetical. But after she died, that's when I decided it. That this would be my life's work, that I wouldn't rest until I found a way to see her again. But it-- it wasn’t just for me, it was for everyone. The entire world. Elliot, he lost both of his parents when he was five. What if-- What if-- What no other child had to go through that again? Imagine death not as a finality, but as nothing more than an inconvenience, an-- an unfortunate circumstance equal to a car breaking down. Irritating, perhaps a bit stressful. But something that could be fixed, life continuing on as usual before long. That was the vision I had, the future I’d dreamed of. I'd already been accepted at Ingleside, I would have access to everything I needed there. Tools, chemicals, even cadavers. All that was left was the work, the dedication, and the perfect storm. Of course, I couldn't tell anyone what I was doing. They wouldn't have understood, they would have tried to stop me with talk of ethics and the dangers of playing God. That made the entire project difficult, not only having to get into the building undetected every night, but hiding my progress where it wouldn't be discovered. But I managed. ...You know, I think that was the last time I really ever felt excited about something. That night, thinking that this was the moment that would lead mankind into a new Golden Age of science. It-- It was like every dream I'd ever had was coming true right before my eyes. I walked into that lab expecting glory. And instead… I ended up like this.

CHRISTINE

...I think she’d be proud of you, you know. [Victor scoffs] I’m serious. You’ve been through a lot, but you keep going, no matter how hard it is. You’re stronger than you give yourself credit for. [Beat.] I lost my dad when I was eleven. We were close, too. Honestly, he was all I had, my mom died not long after I was born. We immigrated from Sweden when I was two, and it took everything he had just to keep us on our feet. Not exactly a huge market for violinists these days. But we were happy, even during the hardest times. It was just the two of us against the rest of the world. But then, all at once, there was just me. I’m sure I don’t need to tell you how difficult it was. It still is sometimes. Some days, everything still reminds me of him. Are you religious, Victor?

VICTOR

No.

CHRISTINE

But you believe in something, I assume. Given your work.

VICTOR

...Yeah. Call it whatever you want, a… soul or whatever. There’s something, I’m just… not sure what it is. Or what happens to it after death. Even now, I… I have no idea.

CHRISTINE

Makes sense. Let’s look at it from a non-religious angle, then. Whatever that something is that you still can’t identify, that you know is there. That soul, or sense of being. It existed in her. Would you say it could be considered some sort of energy?

VICTOR

I guess…?

CHRISTINE

And what’s the First Law of Conservation?

VICTOR

...Energy cannot be created or destroyed.

CHRISTINE

You see what I’m getting at? Whatever that force is, whatever made her her, it’s no stretch of the imagination to say that it’s still out there. Maybe in a different form, but even so. ...I know it’s hard, Victor. There are gonna be days where it all comes rushing back, and you’re gonna feel like breaking down. You've gotta understand, that never really stops. Years from now, you're gonna see something that reminds you of her, and it's going to hurt, no matter how well you've healed. I wish I could say that eventually you'll just stop missing her, but I can't. But it will get easier. There's one main difference between you and me, I think. You're under the impression that your mom's death means that you're alone. I believe that with my father watching over me, I’ll never be alone again.

VICTOR

Poetic.

CHRISTINE

I try to be. But it’s true. And the same goes for the others, too. We love, we mourn. And in time, no matter how impossible it seems, we accept. All you can do is remember that, and hold onto the friends who are still here.

VICTOR

And... are you included in that category?

CHRISTINE

I’d like to be. If you’d let me. [She thinks for a moment] I have an idea. Maybe it will be a step in the right direction for you. What’s your work schedule look like the next few weeks?

VICTOR

...Why, what’re you thinking?

CHRISTINE

Well, if you’re comfortable with it, maybe the two of us could take a trip to- [There is the sound of a horse in the background, and we hear Victor’s breath begin to shake] Victor? You still with me?

VICTOR

We need to leave. 

CHRISTINE

What? Why, is everything okay?

VICTOR

Just go, now!

[The pair get into the car, doors slamming behind them as Christine drives off, clearly shaken up]

CHRISTINE

Victor, what's wrong?

VICTOR

Did-- Did you see her? 

CHRISTINE

See who? 

VICTOR

Her, the-- the woman on the white horse in the field. 

CHRISTINE

The one in the red sweatshirt? I didn't see her face, I--

VICTOR

Because she didn’t have one. 

CHRISTINE

What?

VICTOR

Just-- Just keep driving. This is a long story.

NEXT EPISODE➝

[pamphletstoinspire]

FIRST SUNDAY IN LENT

Today is the First Sunday in Lent.

Lent (the word “Lent” comes from the Old English “lencten,” meaning “springtime) lasts from Ash Wednesday to the Vespers of Holy Saturday — forty days + six Sundays which don't count as “Lent” liturgically. The Latin name for Lent, Quadragesima, means forty and refers to the forty days Christ spent in the desert which is the origin of the Season.The last two weeks of Lent are known as “Passiontide,” made up of Passion Week and Holy Week. The last three days of Holy Week — Maundy Thursday, Good Friday, and Holy Saturday — are known as the “Sacred Triduum.”

The focus of this Season is the Cross and penance, penance, penance as we imitate Christ's forty days of fasting, like Moses and Elias before Him, and await the triumph of Easter. We fast (see below), abstain, mortify the flesh, give alms, and think more of charitable works. Awakening each morning with the thought, “How might I make amends for my sins? How can I serve God in a reparative way? How can I serve others today?” is the attitude to have.

We meditate on “The Four Last Things”: Death, Judgment, Heaven, and Hell, and we also practice mortifications by “giving up something” that would be a sacrifice to do without. The sacrifice could be anything from desserts to television to the marital embrace, and it can entail, too, taking on something unpleasant that we'd normally avoid, for example, going out of one's way to do another's chores, performing “random acts of kindness,” etc. A practice that might help some, especially small children, to think sacrificially is to make use of “Sacrifice Beads” in the same way that St. Thérèse of Lisieux did as a child.

Because of the focus on penance and reparation, it is traditional to make sure we go to Confession at least once during this Season to fulfill the precept of the Church that we go to Confession at least once a year, and receive the Eucharist at least once a year during Eastertide. A beautiful old custom associated with Lenten Confession is to, before going to see the priest, bow before each member of your household and to any you've sinned against, and say, “In the Name of Christ, forgive me if I've offended you.” One responds with “God will forgive you.” Done with an extensive examination of conscience and a sincere heart, this practice can be quite healing (also note that confessing sins to a priest is a Sacrament which remits mortal and venial sins; confessing sins to those you've offended is a sacramental which, like all sacramentals one piously takes advantage of, remits venial sins. Both are quite good for the soul!)

By Abbot Gueranger:

This Sunday, the first of the six which come during Lent, is one of the most solemn throughout the year. In common with the other Sundays of Lent, it has the privilege of taking precedence over all feasts, even that of the patron, titular saint, or dedication of the Church. In the ancient calendars, it is called Invocabit, from the first word of the Introit of the Mass. In the middle ages (more especially in France), it was called Brand Sunday, because the young people, who had misbehaved during the carnival, were obliged to show themselves today at the church with a torch in their hands, as a kind of public satisfaction for their causing disturbance and excess.

Lent solemnly opens today. We have already noticed that the four preceding days were added since the time of St. Gregory the Great, in order to make up the forty days of fasting. But we cannot look upon Ash Wednesday as the solemn opening of the season, for the faithful are not strictly bound to hear Mass on that day. Holy Mother Church, seeing Her children now assembled together, speaks to them, in Her Office of Matins, these eloquent and noble words of St. Leo the Great: “Having to announce to you, dearly beloved, the most sacred and chief fast, how can I more appropriately begin, than with the words of the Apostle, in whom Christ Himself spoke, and by saying to you what has just been read: Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation. For although there be no time which is not replete with divine gifts, and we may always, by God's grace, have access to His mercy, yet ought we all to redouble our efforts to make spiritual progress and be animated with extraordinary confidence, now that the anniversary of the day of our redemption is approaching, inviting us to devote ourselves to every good work, that so we may celebrate, with purity of body and mind, the incomparable mystery of Our Lord's Passion.

“It is true that our devotion and reverence towards so great a mystery should be kept up during the whole year, and we ourselves should be at all times, in the eyes of God, the same as we are bound to be at the Easter solemnity. But this is an effort which only few among us have the courage to sustain. The weakness of the flesh induces us to relax our austerities; the various occupations of every-day life take up our thoughts; and thus even the virtuous find their hearts clogged by this world's dust. Hence it is that Our Lord has most providentially given us these forty days, whose holy exercises should be to us a remedy, whereby to regain our purity of soul. The good works and the holy fastings of this season were instituted as an atonement for, and an obliteration of, the sins we commit during the rest of the year.

“Now, therefore, that we are about to enter upon these days, which are so full of mystery, and which were instituted for the holy purpose of purifying both soul and body, let us, dearly beloved, be careful to do as the Apostle bids us, and cleanse ourselves from all defilement of the flesh and of the spirit: that thus the combat between the two substances being made less fierce, the soul, which, when she herself is subject to God, ought to be the ruler of the body, will recover her own dignity and position. Let us also avoid giving offense to any man, so that there be none to blame or speak evil things of us. For we deserve the harsh remarks of infidels, and we provoke the tongues of the wicked to blaspheme religion, when we who fast lead unholy lives. For our fast does not consist in the mere abstinence from food; nor is it of much use to deny food to our body, unless we restrain the soul from sin” (Fourth Sermon for Lent).

Each Sunday of Lent offers to our consideration a passage from the Gospel, which is in keeping with the sentiments wherewith the Church would have us be filled. Today She brings before us the temptation of Our Lord in the desert. What light and encouragement there is for us in the this instruction!

We acknowledge ourselves to be sinners; we are engaged, at this very time, in doing penance for the sins we have committed—but how was it that we fell into sin? The devil tempted us; we did not reject the temptation; then we yielded to the suggestion, and the sin was committed. This is the history of our past; and such it would, also, be for the future, were we not to profit by the lesson given us today by our Redeemer.

When the Apostle speaks of the wonderful mercy shown us by our Divine Savior, Who vouchsafed to make Himself like to us in all things save sin, he justly lays stress on His temptations (Heb. 4: 15). He, Who is very God, humbled Himself even so low as this, to prove how tenderly He compassionated us. Here then, we have the Saint of saints allowing the wicked spirit to approach Him, in order that we might learn, from His example, how we are to gain victory under temptation.

Satan has had his eye upon Jesus; he is troubled at beholding such matchless virtue. The wonderful circumstances of His birth; the shepherds called by angels to His crib, and the Magi guided by the star; the Infant's escape from Herod's plot; the testimony rendered to this new Prophet by John the Baptist: all these things, which seem so out of keeping with the thirty years spent in obscurity at Nazareth, are a mystery to the infernal serpent, and fill him with apprehension. The ineffable mystery of the Incarnation has been accomplished unknown to him; he never once suspects that the humble Virgin, Mary, is She who was foretold by the prophet Isaias, as having to bring forth the Emmanuel (Is. 7: 14); but he is aware that the time has come, that the last week spoken of to Daniel has begun its course, and that the very pagans are looking towards Judea for a deliverer. He is afraid of this Jesus; he resolves to speak with Him, and elicit from Him some expression which will show him whether He be or not the Son of God; he will tempt Him to some imperfection, or sin, which, should He commit it, will prove that the object of so much fear is, after all, but a mortal man.

The enemy of God and men is, of course, disappointed. He approaches Jesus; but all his efforts turn only to his own confusion. Our Redeemer, with all the self-possession and easy majesty of a God-Man, repels the attacks of Satan; but He reveals not His heavenly origin. The wicked spirit retires without having made any discovery beyond this—that Jesus is a prophet, faithful to God. Later on, when he sees the Son of God treated with contempt, calumniated and persecuted; when he finds that his own attempts to have Him put to death are so successful; his pride and his blindness will be at their height; and not till Jesus expires on the Cross, will he learn that his victim was not merely Man, but Man and God. Then will he discover how all his plots against Jesus have but served to manifest, in all their beauty, the mercy and justice of God: His mercy, because He saved mankind; and His justice, because He broke the power of Hell forever.

These were the designs of Divine Providence in permitting the wicked spirit to defile, by his presence, the retreat of Jesus, to speak to Him, and to lay his hands upon Him. But let us attentively consider the triple temptation in all its circumstances; for our Redeemer suffered it only in order that He might instruct and encourage us.

We have three enemies to fight against; our soul has three dangers; for, as the beloved disciple says, all that is in the world, is the concupiscence of the flesh, and the concupiscence of the eyes, and the pride of life! (1 John 2: 16) By the concupiscence of the flesh, is meant the love of sensual things, which covets whatever is agreeable to the flesh, and, when not curbed, draws the soul into unlawful pleasures. Concupiscence of the eyes expresses the love of the goods of this world, such as riches and possessions; these dazzle the eye, and then seduce the heart. Pride of life is that confidence in ourselves, which leads us to be vain and presumptuous, and makes us forget that all we have, our life and every good gift, we have from God.

Every one of our sins comes from one of these three sources; every one of our temptations aims at making us accept the concupiscence of the flesh, or the concupiscence of the eyes, or the pride of life. Our Savior, then, Who willed to be our Model in all things, deigned to subject Himself to these three temptations.

First of all Satan tempts Him in what regards the flesh: he suggests to Him to satisfy the cravings of hunger by working a miracle, and changing the stones into bread. If Jesus were to consent, and show an eagerness in giving this indulgence to His Body, the tempter will conclude that He is a frail mortal, subject to concupiscence like other men. When he tempts us, who have inherited evil concupiscence from Adam, his suggestions go further that this: he endeavors to defile the soul by the body. But the sovereign holiness of the Incarnate Word could never permit Satan to use upon Him the power which he has received of tempting man in his outward senses. The lesson, therefore, which the Son of God here gives us, is one of temperance; but we know that, for us, temperance is the mother of purity, and that intemperance excites our senses to rebel.

The second temptation is to pride: “Cast Thyself down; the angels shall bear Thee up in their hands.” The enemy is anxious to see if the favors of Heaven have produced in Jesus' soul that haughtiness, that ungrateful self-confidence, which makes the creature arrogate God’s gifts to itself, and forget its Benefactor. Here, also, he is foiled; our Redeemer’s humility confounds the pride of the rebel angel.

He then makes a last effort: he hopes to gain over by ambition Him Who has given such proofs of temperance and humility. He shows Him all the kingdoms of the world, and the glory of them; and says to Him: “All these will I give Thee, if falling down, Thou wilt adore me.” Jesus rejects the wretched offer, and drives from Him the seducer, the prince of this world (John 14: 30); hereby teaching us that we must despise the riches of this world, as often as our keeping or getting them is to be on the condition of our violating the law of God and thereby paying homage to Satan.

But let us observe how it is that our Divine Model, our Redeemer, overcomes the tempter. Does He hearken to his words? Does He allow the temptation time, and give it strength by delay? We did so, when we were tempted; and we fell. But Our Lord immediately meets each temptation with the shield of God's Word. He says: “It is written: Not on bread alone doth man live. It is written: Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God. It is written: The Lord thy God shalt thou adore, and Him only shalt thou serve.” This, then, must be our practice for the time to come. Eve brought perdition on herself, and on the whole human race, because she listened to the serpent. He that dallies with temptation is sure to fall. We are now in a season of extraordinary grace; our hearts are on the watch, dangerous occasions are removed, everything that savors of worldliness is laid aside; our souls, purified by prayer, fasting, and almsdeeds, are to rise with Christ to a new life; but shall we persevere? All depends upon how we behave under temptation. Here, at the very opening of Lent, the Church gives us this passage of the holy Gospel, that we may have not only precept but example. If we be attentive and faithful, the lesson She gives us will produce its fruit; and when we come to the Easter solemnity, we shall have those sure pledges of perseverance: vigilance, self-diffidence, prayer, and the never-failing help of divine grace.

The Greek Church, in spite of her principle of never admitting a feast during Lent, celebrates today one of her greatest solemnities. It is called Orthodoxia, and was instituted in memory of the restoration of sacred images in Constantinople and the eastern empire, in the year 842, when the Empress Theodora (image at left), aided by the holy patriarch Methodius, put a stop to the Iconoclast persecution, and restored to the churches the holy images which the fury of the heretics had taken away.

The Station for the Mass at Rome is the patriarchal basilica of St. John Lateran. It was but right that a Sunday of such solemnity as this should be celebrated in the church which is the mother and mistress of all churches, not only of the holy city itself, but of the whole world. It is here that the public penitents would be reconciled on Maundy Thursday; it is here also, in the Baptistry of Constantine, that the catechumens would receive Baptism on the night of the Easter Vigil. No other basilica could have had such a claim for the Station of a day like this; for it is there that the Lenten Fast had been so often proclaimed by Saints Leo and Gregory.

The Introit, Gradual, Tract, Offertory and Communion are all taken from Psalm 90. We have elsewhere spoken of the appropriateness of this beautiful psalm to the spirit of the Church during the season of Lent. It bids the Christian soul to confide in the divine aid. She is now devoting her whole energies to prayer; she is engaged in battle with her own and God’s enemies. She has need of support. Let her not be afraid, God tells her; she is under His protection as well as that of the holy angels. It was this passage that Satan attempted to abuse in his second temptation:

He shall cry to Me and I will hear him: I will deliver him, and I will glorify him: I will fill him with length of days. He that dwelleth in the aid of the Most High, shall abide under the protection of the God of Heaven… God hath given His angels charge over thee, to keep thee in all thy ways. In their hands they shall bear thee up, lest at any time thou dash thy foot against a stone…

In the Collect, the Church prays for Her children, that their fast may not only purify them, but also obtain for them that divine assistance, which will secure their salvation by enabling them to abound in good works:

O God, Who dost purify Thy Church by the yearly observance of Lent: grant to Thy family that what we try to obtain of Thee by abstinence, we may secure by good works. Through Our Lord Jesus Christ…

There follows a Lesson from the sixth chapter of the Second Epistle of St. Paul to the Corinthians:

Brethren: We entreat you not to receive the grace of God in vain. For He says, “In an acceptable time I have heard thee, and in the day of salvation I have helped thee.” Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation! We give no offense to anyone, that our ministry may not be blamed. On the contrary, let us conduct ourselves in all circumstances as God's ministers, in much patience; in tribulations, in hardships, in distresses; in stripes, in imprisonments, in tumults; in labors, in sleepless night, in fastings; in innocence, in knowledge, in long-sufferings; in kindness, in the Holy Ghost, in unaffected love; in the word of truth, in the power of God; with the armor of justice on the right had and on the left; in honor and dishonor, in evil report and good report; as deceivers and yet truthful, as unknown and yet well known; as dying, and behold, we live; as chastised but not killed; as sorrowful yet always rejoicing; as poor yet enriching many; as having nothing yet possessing all things.

These words of the Apostle give us a very different idea of the Christian life from that which our own tepidity suggests. We dare not say that he is wrong and we are right; but we put a strange interpretation upon his words, and we tell both ourselves and those around us that the advice he here gives is not to be taken literally nowadays, and that it was written for those special difficulties of the first age of the Church, when the faithful stood in need of unusual detachment and almost heroism, because they were always in danger of persecution and death. This interpretation is full of that discretion which meets with the applause of our cowardice, and it easily persuades us to be at rest, just as though we had no dangers to fear, and no battle to fight; whereas we have both; for there is the devil, the world, flesh and blood. The Church never forgets it; and hence, at the opening of this great season, She sends us into the desert, that there we may learn from our Jesus how we are to fight. Let us go; let us learn from the temptations of our Divine Master that the life of man upon earth is a warfare (Job 7: 1), and that, unless our fighting be truceless and brave, our life, which we would fain pass in peace, will witness our defeat. That such a misfortune may not befall us, the Church cries out to us, in the words of St. Paul: Behold, now is the acceptable time; behold, now is the day of salvation! Let us, in all things, comport ourselves as the servants of God, and keep our ground unflinchingly to the end of our holy campaign. God is watching over us, as He did over His beloved Son in the desert.

The Holy Gospel is taken from the fourth chapter of St. Matthew:

At that time, Jesus was led into the desert by the Spirit, to be tempted by the devil. And after fasting forty days and forty nights, He was hungry. And the tempter came and said to Him, “If Thou art the Son of God, command that these stones become loaves of bread.” But He answered and said, “It is written, ‘Not by bread alone does man live, but by every words that comes forth from the mouth of God'.” Then the devil took Him into the holy city and set Him on the pinnacle of the temple, and said to Him, “If Thou art the Son of God, throw Thyself down; for it is written, ‘He has given His angels charge concerning Thee; and upon their hands they shall bear Thee up, lest Thou dash Thy foot against a stone'.” Jesus said to him, “It is written further, ‘Thou shalt not tempt the Lord thy God'.” Again, the devil took Him to a very high mountain, and showed Him all the kingdoms of the world and the glory of them. And he said to Him, “All these things will I give Thee, if Thou wilt fall down and worship me.” Then Jesus said to him, “Begone, Satan, for it is written, ‘The Lord thy God shalt thou worship and Him only shalt thou serve'.” Then the devil left Him; and behold, angels came and ministered to Him.

Let us admire the exceeding goodness of the Son of God, Who, not satisfied with atoning for all our sins by dying on the Cross, deigns to suffer a fast of forty days and forty nights, in order to encourage us to do penance. He would not that the justice of His heavenly Father should exact any punishment from us, unless He Himself first suffered it, and that too, a thousand times more severely than we could. What are all our penances, even were they done thoroughly, when we compare them with the severity of this fast of Jesus in the desert? Can we dare to be ever asking for dispensations from the little which Our Lord asks of us in atonement for our sins, which deserve such rigorous penance? Instead of complaining at our feeling a slight inconvenience of a few days' duration, let us compassionate our innocent Jesus, Who subjects Himself to forty days of most rigorous privation of food and drink.

What was it that supported Him? Prayer, devotedness to us, and the knowledge of the exigencies of His Father's justice. And when the forty days were over, and His human Nature was faint from exhaustion, He is assailed by temptation; but here again He thinks of us, and sets us an example: He triumphs over the temptation, calmly and resolutely, and thereby teaches us how to conquer. How blasphemous the boldness of Satan, who dares to tempt the Just One! But how divine is the patience of Jesus, Who permits the hellish monster to lay his hand upon Him, and carry Him from place to place!

The Christian soul is oftentimes exposed to the vilest insults from this same enemy; nay, at times, she is on the point of complaining to her God, for permitting her to have such humiliations. Let her, on these occasions, think upon Jesus, the Saint of saints, Who was given over, so to speak, to the wicked spirit; and yet, He is not the less the Son of God, the Conqueror of Hell; and all that Satan gains by his attack is utter defeat. In the same way, if the soul, when under the violence of temptation, resists with all her energy, she is not one jot less dear to God, and Satan retires with one more eternal shame and chastisement upon him.

Let us take part with the holy angels, who, as soon as the tempter is gone, come to our Redeemer, and respectfully administer food to Him. How affectionately do they compassionate His hunger and thirst! How zealously they make amends, by their adorations, for the frightful outrage the charity of their God, Who, out of His love for man, seems to have been forgetting His own dignity, in order to provide for the wants of the children of Adam.

by Fr. Francis Xavier Weninger, 1876

Then Jesus said to him: Be gone, Satan!”–Matt. 4 : 10.

There is but one evil, and that is sin. This evil has many different paths by which it approaches us. These paths are called temptations. It is true that of themselves temptations can not injure us. On the contrary, Holy Writ says: “Blessed is the man that endureth, for when he hath been proved he shall receive the crown of life, which God hath promised to them that love Him.” All depends upon our withstanding them, and to be able to do this we must heed the admonition of Christ, we must watch and especially guard ourselves against those temptations through which Satan most frequently approaches man.

There are in particular three temptations to which today's Gospel refers, and to which a large portion of mankind fall victims; the three temptations, namely, with which Satan dared to tempt Christ, our Lord, Himself.

Let us see, today, what sort of temptations these are. Mary, thou mighty stronghold against the hosts of the tempter, give us thy assistance, that we may come forth victorious from the fight! I speak in the most holy name of Jesus, to the greater glory of God!

And the tempter approaching Him, said: “Command that these stones be made bread!” To what temptation do these words refer? I say to that temptation with which Satan assaults man when he enters upon life–the immoderate care for the goods of this world. It is the temptation of excessive labor, and anxiety after a business profession in order to gain a position in society. Yes, for a great number, even for many who otherwise seem to live piously, this is the net which entangles them in numberless temptations.

This regard for the world frequently causes men to forget their last aim and end. Instead of thinking only of what is requisite; for salvation, and pursuing it with their whole heart and the entire strength of their will, they live altogether for earthly things, and think seriously of nothing else. This worldly care extinguishes all their longing after perfection, and causes them to neglect those means of divine grace which are placed within their reach.

The man who is a prey to this inordinate care begins the day without prayer, and without a right intention; he neglects Mass, pious reading, and the holy Sacraments. His excuse is that his business leaves him no time for devotion, while in his intercourse with the world temptations approach him by countless roads. He hopes to satisfy the cravings of his heart with temporal wealth and pleasures; he expects to change the hard and tasteless stones of worldly enjoyment into bread which will nourish his soul but he is mistaken.

These perverse sentiments of the heart open wide the gate to all kinds of temptations; egotism, envy, anger, enmity, intemperance, deceit and injustice enter, and the wretched man endeavors to serve two masters, God and the world. But the world, at last, completely ensnares him, and, instead of conquering temptation, he is vanquished by it.

Satan said to Jesus after he had carried Him to the pinnacle of the temple: “Cast thyself down !” To what temptation do these words refer? To that dangerous state of the heart which causes man through presumption to fall a victim of his own foolhardiness.

And how? He neither fears God, nor the possibility of committing sin; he trusts in himself too much, and thinks that there is no danger of his swerving from the right path, and, while thus feeling secure, instead of avoiding temptation, he runs into it.

To this class of tempted persons belong those who are satisfied with being nominal children of the true Church, and who think that, because they are members of that Church out of whose pale there is no salvation, they will, without doubt, gain heaven. In a word, they are strangers to that fear of which St. Paul speaks when he says: “Work your salvation with fear and trembling.” To such people Satan need not go, they themselves seek him!

To this class belong also those who, in the selection of their place of business or their home, pay no attention to facilities for hearing Mass and receiving the Sacraments.

Finally, to this class belong those who are addicted to drinking, visiting bar-rooms, gambling; those who think only of pleasure, frequent dangerous company, read immoral books, and imagine that all this, in reality, has no evil consequences, and will not lead them into sin. Woe to these! They love the danger and will perish in it.

Lastly, Satan showed to Christ from the summit of a mountain all the kingdoms of the world, and said to Him: “All these will I give Thee if, falling down, thou wilt adore me.” What temptation is this? It is the temptation of self-love, of vanity, of pride in all its forms, a sin which deprives even virtuous actions of their merit. It is that self-adoration which causes man, even in a life devoted to piety, to seek more his own honor than the honor of God.

And yet how small, how trivial, is the honor which the world can give to man. Even were it to bestow all its glory and applause; how infinitely small would this be, when compared to God and the kingdom which He has promised and will give us! Those who are convinced of this truth will doubtless meet the tempter with an energetic: “Be gone!”

But it is in this determination, in this energy, that man is most deficient. Were this not the case, did he not waver, Satan would not hope, by again and again renewing his temptations, to succeed in the end; he would not even dare to tempt us. He knows well that he can do us no harm by tempting us, provided we remain firm, but that, on the contrary, he would only give us occasions to merit and adorn our crown of victory with jewels of virtue. St. Ignatius says: “Courage on our part discourages Satan.” If, however, he sees that we are in the least inclined to yield, then he is most persevering, and, tempting us again and again, attacks us on all sides and in all possible ways. Perceiving that he does not succeed in one attempt and through the instrumentality of one person, he makes a second attempt and seeks more efficient auxiliaries. He knows from experience how to undermine the foundation of great virtues and destroy them.

The one thing which frightens him and causes him to retreat is a decided: “Be gone!” In order, however, to feel strong and resolute, we must think daily and continually on the certainty of death, and on judgment, which one day will decide whether we are to dwell for evermore in heaven or in hell. If in temptation we turn to our crucified Saviour, and, making the sign of the cross, call on Jesus with the lips and the heart, Satan will flee, victory will be ours, and angels approaching us will console us with sweet thoughts of heaven! Amen!

“And the tempter coming, said to Him.”–Matt. 4 : 3.

God wills that all men should be saved, as St. Paul assures us, and Lent reminds us emphatically of the truth of these words. Many of the mysteries of the life of Christ, to which the Church refers during Lent in the Gospels at Mass, are evidences that Christ came into the world to teach men how to live in order to gain salvation, especially the mysteries of His apostolic life, which ended with His suffering and death upon the cross.

God, it is true, allows Satan to tempt us, but only in order to prove our fidelity, and to recompense us the more in the world to come. If men fail in this trial of liberty, then they have not employed the means God offers them to issue victorious from the strife. What means are these? A glance at the manner in which the: Church observes Lent will answer this question.

Mary, Mother of the elect, pray for us that we may be of the number of those who stand victoriously the test of temptation! I speak in the most holy name of Jesus, to the greater glory of God!

At the commencement of Lent the Church puts ashes upon the heads of her children, saying: “Remember, man, that thou art dust, and that into dust thou shalt return.” The Church desires to keep the thought of the certainty and proximity of death alive in the hearts of her children. One of the chief reasons why so many souls, though ransomed by the blood of Christ, are lost, is their incomprehensible forgetfulness of death. If all men possessed that consciousness of death of which the Apostle speaks, and remembered its certainty, its nearness, they would never be lost for eternity. What is it that generally leads men into temptation and takes from them all strength and courage to withstand it?

His sinful inclinations, his desire for the goods, honors, and pleasures of this world, together with the forgetfulness of the certainty and nearness of death. Oh, that all men would each morning put ashes on their heads in spirit, and repeat the words of the Church on Ash Wednesday: Remember that thou art dust, and that to dust thou shalt return. Think that this day is perhaps your last! How many of those who in the morning go bright and happy to their labor, are brought home at night corpses! If this should be the case with you, what then? As ashes placed upon burning coals deaden and even extinguish their glow, so this recollection will reduce and stifle the fire of passion.

If men would occasionally take a solitary ramble in some cemetery, and thus awaken within themselves the recollection of the certainty and nearness of death, they would gain strength for the fight against temptations of selfishness, ambition, and worldliness. How wealth, honors, and pleasures lose their attraction in the silent cities of the dead! Smoke they are and vapor, viewed from the brink of the grave.

Is it not astonishing to see how anxious men are to render their condition in life as favorable to ease and comfort as possible, how careful they are to evade anything that might endanger their welfare in this world? They never give a thought to the shortness and uncertainty of this life, to the dangers that always hang over their heads; they do not consider that daily and hourly men die, and that soon they, too, must say to themselves: My turn has come.

They hear and know that nothing is so sure, nothing as inevitable as death, and yet as a saint of latter times, the blessed Hofbauer, whose canonization is now in progress, said: “Men know that they must die, and yet they do not believe it, but live as if this life were the only one they would ever possess, the only one for which they need care. Hence their negligence in all that pertains to their salvation, and hence also their eternal destruction.”

The Church requires her children during Lent to mortify themselves by observing the laws prescribed for this season. She not only demands of them to abstain from meat and partake of only one meal a day, but she desires above all to awaken and strengthen in their hearts the spirit of self-abnegation. Holy Writ says: “The life of man upon earth is a warfare.” To conduct it properly and victoriously we must follow the admonition of Christ and mortify our selves.

The second cause of so many being lost is the want of the true spirit of repentance, and self-humiliation. Christ sent His Apostles as missionaries into the world with this message: Tell the people that if they do not repent they shall all perish. And St. Paul says: “And they who are Christ's have crucified their flesh with its vices and concupiscences.” Man craves happiness; while here below he wishes to enjoy the pleasures of an earthly paradise, and hopes one day to share, besides, the joys of heaven.

How many there are to whom the reproach of the Apostle may be justly addressed: “Whose god is their belly!” The desire of pleasure and excitement leads man into temptation, and causes him to indulge sinful inclinations, to commit mortal sin, and so lose eternal life.

The Church exhorts her children to live in retirement and meditation during Lent, and to devote more time to prayer and religious exercises. Why are so many souls lost even among the children of the Church? I answer, because they have not the spirit of prayer and contemplation, because they have not recourse to pious books for holy thoughts. Men live thoughtlessly, and do not take time to say a daily prayer or think with recollected minds of God and the eternal truth of His Word. They do not reflect or meditate upon what they believe. They do not reduce to practice the teachings of their faith, but live, although members of the Church, like Pagans. It is for this reason that Christians as well as heathens are lost. Jeremias has said: “With desolation is the land made desolate; because there is none that considereth in the heart.” Would to God that this reproach could not be referred to Christians!

St. Teresa says: “I fear not for a soul who prays.” But how few really pray while they are going through their devotions! Only too many deserve the reproach of the Lord: “This people honoreth me with their lips, but their heart is far from me.” We either pray not at all, or fail in the manner, frequency, and perseverance of our aspirations to God, especially in time of temptation. Hence so many are powerless to resist the attacks of passion, and miserably fall.

The Church desires that her children, during Lent, should frequently and attentively hear the word of God and endeavor to profit by it. All, however, do not listen to her. But too many read their reproach and their condemnation in the words of Christ to the Jews. Christ Himself reproaches them, saying: “You hear not the words of God, because you are not of God.”

There are many Christians who, throughout the year, never hear a sermon, or who, if they hear one, listen to it not as to the word of God, and as if God Himself were addressing them, but regard it merely in its human element; hence their indifference to profit by it for the life to come, and hence also their eternal destruction.

The Church wishes her children to meditate, especially during Lent, upon the passion and death of Christ, in order that the love of the cross may fill their hearts. Christ says: “He who will follow me must take up his cross daily;” and the Holy Ghost: “In your patience you shall possess your souls.”

How many Christians neither love nor esteem the cross! yet they must endure the trials and afflictions of life. Their aversion to suffering only makes their burden heavier and more irksome. Murmuring against the decrees of Providence, they carry their cross as did the thief who was crucified at the left of our Lord. They forget that they can only enter the abode of the blessed by following Christ who walked before us the road of the cross to open for us the gates of heaven. Hence their weakness and faithlessness under trials and tribulations; hence, too, their eternal destruction.

The Church further desires her children during Lent to confess their sins and receive the Most Blessed Sacrament devoutly and worthily. That all do not comply with this wish, is evident from the fact, that the Church, to our great shame, has been obliged to give the following precept: “Confess your sins at least once a year to a priest duly authorized, and receive holy Communion at Easter or thereabout.”

They are in the greatest danger of making it the occasion of still greater evil. People who can only be prevailed upon by the most positive order to have recourse to the Sacraments, run a great risk of receiving them unworthily. Human respect may drive them to the confessional and the holy table:, but the chances are that they return from them more wicked, more laden with guilt than before.

Were the children of the Church to receive the Sacraments frequently and worthily, the consoling words of Christ would be fulfilled in them: “He that eateth My flesh, and drinketh My blood, hath everlasting life;” he “abideth in Me and I in him.” Yet how many men neglect to receive the blessed Sacrament, or else receive it without preparation or unworthily. This is the cause of the loss of many souls among Christians. Therefore, let us live, not only during Lent, but all our days, in the spirit in which the Church observes Lent, and let us practise those pious exercises which she recommends in order that after the Good-Friday of our life here below, we may celebrate Easter in the joys of life everlasting! Amen!

From: www.pamphletstoinspire.com