#i can't explain why this tweet is so fucking funny to me

[graciousdragon]

I FINALLY FUCKING FOUND IT I'VE BEEN LOOKING FOR THIS TWEET FOR AGES

[am-i-the-asshole-official]

AITA for calling my friend annoying?

My friend group and I (15NB) all met on twitter, specifically on anitwt for a specific fandom. Won't name it, but it's super popular, anyway, I really like the main character and I make lots of edits of him that I would post on twitter or just rt art of him I like. I made a few oomfs who liked my edits and we soon became friends :]

tho one of our mutual friends has a delusional attachment to the main character, which I don't mind at all, but the problem is that whenever I post my edits, he (16M) ALWAYS comments something along the lines of "Oh 😳", "I didn't know you felt that way about me", "Did you edge to me while making this", "this is my roman empire <3" and other stuff. It was funny the first few times, but it's become very annoying now and I can't stand to see his replies under my edits. I muted him but even then I know he's still saying that since he says the same comments in my tiktok comments too when I post my edits there.

I know he doesn't control the delusion but it's still annoying he keeps talking about the character as if like I'm personally in love with him when i just like the character, i've gotten sick of it. I vented about it on my priv, I did not say any names but I did say "its fucking annoying getting the same annoying comments from the same person as if im in love w them and yknow not the actual fucking character 🥸🥸". It was all on my priv but I'm pretty sure someone saw the tweet and guessed it was him, since it got leaked with him having a screenshot of it (Ive since deleted it).

He called me ableist and told me it's not his fault he's attached to the character and I should be ashamed for calling someone with a DA annoying for what they can't control and insuiating that they are not the character. I made tweet out of anger which is why I made it on priv but I get now I shouldn't have said that. What I had meant is that I find it really annoying when he makes every comment or post of mine about the character to be about him like I'm flirting with him. I know he's the character but like also not??? Idk how to explain and I'm sorry if it was ableist and still ableist of how I'm explaining it, I just don't want every post of mine to be taken as flirts when I just like the character. (im a lesbian anyway so if that helps).

I made a apology on my main, removed my oomfs who didn't want to be oomfs anymore and deactivated my accounts. I still have time to reactivate them but I don't know if its worth it. I still really like the character but idk if I want to do that all again. I'm just thinking about making a new edit account for a new fandom and moving on, but at the very least I just want to know if I was the TA in this

What are these acronyms?

[highoncatfood]

SHIP BINGO TIME

Gonna ask for three cuz I can't pick... teehee

Kokogami, Makoyomi, and umm Dirkuu (my friend talks to me about dirkuu a lot it seems fun)

answering these finally hiiii i went to bed and then had work today so uh yeah

kokogami - now let me explain a few things here.. i checked both 'grew on me' and the big bad 'IDCCC' cuz truthfully i couldnt care less abt it esp in canon idgaf and the 1st few times i rewatched raincode they jst frustrated me sm as a pairing. like at first it was jst me being a shini hater but even after i started to like her more i jst canntttt get myself to like them in any romantic scenerio. but i do love how ppl in the fandom portray them a lot and all the fanart is very cute so i guess wht i mean when i say it grew on me is that ive come to like it more cuz of fanon :thumbsupemoji:

makoyomi - ok so like. when i first watched raincode and saw them interact for the 1st time i was like ok yeah. i see why this is one of the biggest ships in the fandom. and normally i would ship it right away but for some reason i consciously decided to do everything in my power to not let myself ship it. i dont rememeber whyyyy?? i did that?? i think i jst thought that would be rlly funny to like. me and no one else

but anyway with each rewatch i grew to like them more + fandom influenced me. but like i still wouldnt say i ship them.. i like their dynamic but i dont care for it as any kind of romantic/whtever ship neccessairly.. its mostly jst very funny to me. i rlly like yomi having a weird complicated hate crush on makoto and having no idea how to deal with it . like it doesnt even cross his mind to rlly consider it anything possibly romantic or sexual even tho it lowkey might be. who knows. hes jst mad abt it

and i like makoto acting oblivious as shit to it on purpose jst to mess with him even further, i like makoto teasing and bugging him and jst being so fucking annoying. they both r

this tweet is exactly how im tryna be abt them but like. on purpose. idk why its liek the funniest thing ever to me

dirkuu - havent thought abt them for a while but i mean. theyre hilarious i love caliborn and i love dirk . theyre jst stupid as fuck and i love all the fanart of them its like some of my fav pieces of hs fancontent probably.. yeah not much else to say abt it lol

[the1975attheirverybest]

Hello I wanted to talk to you about something. Would like to hear your opinion on it because I really respect it. So on Twitter Trumanblack was trening lately and I saw people being mad that truman Black came back.

Here's couple of tweets, to show you the perspective:

,He is escaping the reality through this character. Being sincere and open is the way to live life not hiding behing fictional characters. He needs to grow up and realize where his priorities are.

Ofc, we do not know him. His choice, his life.

Or

what the fuck happened matty. I don't understand what you're doing right now. should have left Truman in the trash. I don't get it.

Or

This. It seems he was used to dealing with difficult emotions through avoiding them in stage character (he admitted to this in an interview recently) & he wanted to ditch the character & embrace the emotions/be sincere things maybe got too raw & real so he is back in charakter

I'm sorry this message is so long. I'm just thinking about it all. Do you think 'matty' is gone and he will be acting and all that in the upcoming tour? Cause I wouldnt like it and it won't be good for him too :/

Again sorry this is so long

No, I mean, this is an interesting topic that I think we should 100% get into to "warm up" for the tour. I bet we'll have even more to say once we start getting content from the first new shows in September. (omg not too far away now aaaahhhh), so everyone feel free to chime in, but basically, here is how I think about it ( this is probs gonna be long. apologies in advance. im gonna add a "keep reading" so i dont destroy y'all feeds).

The first thing we need to remember is that Matty's "Truman Black" persona pre-dates the ATVB tour. He's always been "Truman Black." He's always been a jokester, a meme lord, a bit chaotic, a bit sexy, a pastiche or caricature of himself.

The question, then, is why? Why does he do this?

For several reasons. And he's been nothing but honest with us about them.

From as early on as 23 years old, when ST first started blowing up and the boys cultivated a following, Matty became acutely aware of the spotlight and the way that fans idealized and idolized him. Sexually desired him, saw him as this rockstar figure. And it made him uncomfortable because, well, no real human being could live up to such a fantasy, right? That's really what the song "Love Me" is about. He experienced this during album 1 and instantly wrote about it for album 2. like thats how strongly he felt it. He's more eloquent about it than I can ever be, so I'm going to link you to his explanation of "Love Me."

so, as he's pointing out in his explanation, he plays this kinda ridiculous character to "subvert" expectations. right? even in the mv, he has cardboard cut outs of sex symbols and heart throbs like Harry Styles etc. and he takes his shirt off and stands next to them and makes out with them and all that. Usually, the normal rockstar-fan relationship is that we project our fantasy upon the rockstar and the rockstar accepts it obligingly. But Matty's going "well this is really kinda silly, and it makes me feel sooo disconnected from myself if i turn into this person everyone thinks i am, so what am i gonna do? oh I'll just lean into the silliness." so if he can't do the "fake authenticity" of the cliched rockstar, hes gonna do a very authentic fakeness of being loud, and silly goofy funny messy larger than life, etc.

He explains it here (I've cued it up to the right moment in the video). He's right, if you're a stranger and you know nothing about him and you see him behaving in a Truman-black-esque way, you'd think "wow what an arrogant piece of shit this dude is." BUT if you realize that he's like "i KNOW that you all think of me this way. And YOU (the fans) know that I know that you think that way." we become in on the joke.

You know what im gonna say here. Postmodernism. LMAO. No, but for real. Postmodern art naturally has this "meta" habit. It's art that knows itself as art. It's aware that it's not real. Like movies that are constantly referring to themselves as movies. breaking the experience of illusion for you by constantly reminding you that what you are watching has been filmed and edited. it's not real life. Thats what Matty does with the "rockstar persona" constantly reminding you "it's not real. im just a character made up in all our heads. I'm actually a normal human being but my job is kinda fuckin mental."

So, I think those 4 points, from VERRRYYY early in Matty's career are the genesis of Truman Black. Thats what "Truman Black" is based on.

You could ask, well, if Matty has been this way from the very beginning how come it's such a problem now? how come this whole thing is a new issue??

I think its the perfect storm of this year.

The ATVB show was designed to push the blurry lines between Matty Healy/ Truman Black to their very limits cuz they added extra layers of meta-theatricality to an already meta situation haha. He plays himself in the couch scene, and the raw meat scene, but he's also kind of playing a symbolic version of himself that's supposed to apply to a lot of straight men, but then the show is also about the lines between his personal and his public lives.

Then he goes and does the Truman Black rockstar shit in the second half of the show. So, the tour really could've been called "Matty Healy: At His Very Truman Black-esque" and it would have been accurate. Like he took this concept and stretched it to see how far it could take him.

Then of course you have the podcast thing, the taylor swift thing, the twitter cancelation cycles, etc etc etc.

There were so many new eyes on him. and so much out of context (remember, meta-theatricality needs context. needs the audience to be in on the joke. we have to know 'oh hes making fun of himself being a rockstar') cuz if we don't have the context he really comes off as a guy who's in love with himself and his rockstar status haha.

Now that alllll of this background is out of the way, lets discuss the questions that you've brought up.

Is he Matty or is he Truman Black?

I think lots of people didn't notice that when he threw out the lab coat that was labeled "truman black" in the video, he wasn't serious. he instantly starts doing the robot dance, flipping the camera off with his finger, acting disruptive by riding the trolley thingy. All Truman Black behavior: mischief, breaking rules, etc. so it was a "meta" joke. he tossed the character then acted like the character. a contradiction. ironic. Truman Black's never been gone! he and Matty are intertwined necessarily. you can't separate one from the other.

Is he gonna be acting at all in S...ATVB?

Yes. He will. He's working with Brad Troemel whose sense of humor is very close to Matty's and who loves irony and postmodernism.

Does he use Truman Black to "hide from difficult situations" or to "run from his emotions" or whatever that tweet was saying? no. He uses it to deliver social critique. About masculinity being ridiculous, about our relationship to artists and the fantasy of perfection in Rockstar cliches, about performative wokeness.

Those are the very same beliefs that Matty Healy believes in. hes always criticizing these things in interviews and speeches and stuff. So, no, hes not hiding behind the character to disassociate he IS the same guy, just a slightly less dramatized and exaggerated version.Thats why he doesn't completely turn it on or off at any time. Thats why it's not that he was willing to stop it for a relationship and then start it again when it didn't work out. Thats not how Matty operates at allll.

He didn't throw out his belief that performative wokeness is harmful and stupid, he didn't throw out his belief that leftist masculinity is confusing, he didn't change who he is at his very core just to be mr nice guy, or to be sincere, or to get his dick sucked off by Taylor Swift, or whatever these people think is the reason. He's always been this way; he very likely will always be this way. Thats just how he makes art and how he thinks about the world.

He's always BEEN open to embracing emotions and being sincere. "I love you, don't you mind?" "we're only human we're just like you man" "I'll quote on the road like a twat," "im petrified of being alone, its pathetic," "im just pissed off because you pied me off after your show," "you pick a fight and i'll define it" "i said its cool i was messing but its true," "pretend that i know what it is (i wasn't listening)" "sorry that I quite like seeing myself on the news. im sorry that im someone that i wish i could change, but ive always been the same."

would an emotionally stunted anti-sincerity guy write ANY OF THESE LYRICS? idk, you tell me.

[tarmac-rat]

PER THE "NIGHT SKY" POST--

Hi there. My name is Seta LeCarpetron Flow, known shitposter for the hit 2020 video game Cyberpunk 2077 and generally-unwilling Tumblr funnyguy. If you've stumbled upon this post, congratulations! That means you've seen my shitpost about advertising in the night sky and decided to check out my blog, which eventually led you here. Here's a list of commonly asked questions I see about my shitpost that I thought I'd compile here for your enjoyment.

"Why did you do this?" -- this was a shitpost that escaped containment very quickly and with absolutely no warning.

"Never played the game, can you explain the joke to me?"-- In Night City, the game's setting, holographic advertisements are placed on the top of skyscrapers and scroll upwards for the citizens to look at. The response down below from "@/johnnysilverhandofficial" is a reference to the fact that in the game's canon, main character Johnny Silverhand commits an act of terrorism by blowing up the largest skyscraper in the city. It's a whole thing. The account tweeting, "@/NightCityWire", is the name of the YouTube show where devs of the game would give updates on its progress back when it was still being developed. 'Twitter for Holo' on the bottom is a reference to the fact that in the game, the characters use Holos to communication rather than cellphones.

"Why did you think this would be funny?"-- *'I don't know' noise*, I thought this was gonna hit like, 200 notes at most. The Cyberpunk fandom isn't that big.

"Is it based on something?"-- It's based on this exchange on Twitter that happened a couple of years ago, with a few copy edits. I usually credit inspirations and templates in my posts but again, did not think this post was going to blow up as much as it did.

"What even is the purpose of this blog?"-- CYPK2077 shitposting, generally. Occasionally writing, VP, whinging about lore, and complaining that I can't take photos on PC. The works.

"Are you a roleplay blog?"-- I have no fucking idea why people think this is a roleplay blog. This hardly qualifies as a roleplay shitpost. I don't roleplay. Stop telling people that I'm a roleplay blog in the tags, it's really goddamn annoying.

"Alright, so what's you're biggest issue, then?"-- My biggest issue is that people keep taking this post at face value without understanding the context. That's fine, I get it, the changes I made are not very noticeable and I probably edited it a bit too much, but I need to ensure people that this is a JOKE. It is not REAL. I cannot stress enough that this is a shitpost that got wildly out of hand and it's a little depressing that the state of the world is so whack that people look at this, go "yeah, that's real" and reblog it.

"Why are you making THIS post?"-- Because I've had to read thousands of tags on this post day in and day out lamenting the fall of society and our world's headlong rush towards capitalistic annihilation, and frankly, it kinda wears on me after a while. If I can get at least some person to look at this post and be like "Oh, okay, I get it now" before they reblog it at face value, then I'll consider this worth it in my eyes.

"You know this is kind of passive-aggressive, right?"-- yes, yes it is. But when you've had 27,000 people reblog the stupid shitpost you made in 20 minutes because you were bored at work and seen 95% of them take it out of context and/or make dumb assumptions about you based on it, you'd probably be a little Pass-Agro too.

Thank you for reading my FAQ on this blog's most popular shitpost. Never thought the day would come where I'd need to make this, but here we are.

[leojurand]

i see people on booktwt praising the radiant emperor duology very often and every time, instead of remembering that i actually had fun reading those books, i think about how flawed they are, and i wish i could understand the endless praise they get. but i sadly do not.

and then i remembered a tweet by shelley parker-chan about dunnett and her novels that actually explains, in a way, why their writing doesn't work for me. the tweet was a reply to someone and it was:

but Dunnett in general never feeds me the (emotional) food and I get frustrated. like bitch these power plays are so good but why don’t you make it JUICY. don’t make me have to use my imagination

it's actually very funny how this explains exactly the problems i have with their duology. clearly, dunnett is a big fan of subtlety. also very clear, SPC is not, and doesn't utilize it much (at all) in their novels.

and the complete lack of subtlety is something that really bothered me in the radiant emperor duology. that, hand in hand with the endless repetition, makes sure you don't have to use your imagination when it comes to the characters. ever. you will be told how they feel about each other and about what's happening and about what they've done and will do. constantly

but that, for me at least, doesn't make you connect with those characters more, and it doesn't make them more complex (in fact, sometimes they feel like two emotions in a trenchcoat lol). of course too little emotional food can leave you hungry, but too much can cause indigestion

the thing is, i don't need dunnett to tell me that, for example, nicholas was battling with the pain of gelis's betrayal and the profound grief of the loss of his closest friend post-SoG. i know he's dealing with those feelings, i'm seeing it, because he fucked off to be a menace in scotland and he's wearing all black and he's kidnapping people to torment them for a while (lol). and that's so much more interesting than writing paragraph after paragraph of his emotional breakdown. because, yes, i can use my imagination. i like doing that!

would the lymond chronicles be better if we got descriptions of how lymond is drowning in pain and self-hatred during basically every chapter in RC or CM? it's obvious that that's what's happening to him. i think it would actually make the books and the character worse, because doing that doesn't fit who lymond is, just like it wouldn't fit nicholas.

the constant repetition of how zhu, ouyang, and baoxiang feel are not "juicy" to me. they're fine characters and i like them. i would even say they're pretty interesting! but you could pretty much define each of them with a couple of words and you would get like. 90% of who they are. no subtlety. no imagination.

you can't define lymond with two or three or ten words. same with nicholas. even dunnett's characters who seem more simple and straightforward, like richard or julius, are more complex than that

another thing is that focusing so much on the emotional journey of the characters means that other parts of the book are completely neglected. the radiant emperor duology is a low fantasy historical fiction. but the historical part of it is given almost no attention at all. if i pick a histfic book, i want to feel immersed in the time period it's portraying. that didn't happen at all while reading these two books. you may like dunnett's minute historical details more or less (hell, i'm a huge fan and even i want to skip most of the historical mumbo jumbo in some of her novels (the ringed castle)), but goddamn she makes you feel immersed in the 15th and 16th centuries

anyway, the conclusion here is that SPC doesn't love dunnett's style, and i don't love their style. i will probably still read their following books when they get published, but i really, really hope they learn just one thing: sometimes (most of the time) books that are subtle, are better

[abozsazzz]

1

@holidayturkeyy

(written from of a friend of mine sharing experience)

bullying: I'm one of the victims of them bullying me, I was 16 years old, confused about a small headcanon and still firguing out more underneath the nonbinary umbrella, I didn't know being confused would causw such hate and attacking toward me? i came off polite and confused at the beginning until her 19-25 year old friends attacked me, it was scary for me to be attacked by literal adults because i was confused over a small thing, it sent me in an panic and of course I striked back with anger I'll admit that, but the audacity to go out of your way to send adults to actual an literal minor is so immature and gross in all ways, a simple question asked and attacked, like what was the issue? you got all your friends to come at me because i butthurt you over being confused, you bully literal minors you even laughed about this after in your tweets when you knew I was getting attacked, you blocked me because you didnt know how to defend yourself in any situations your brought up in alone, you always have to have your friends/followers hold your hand to do to it for you. you are 18 years old, on twitter, acting this way towards minors, im mentioning this now because it still bothers me, of course an minor would still be bothered by this, why wouldn't they be? literally attacked by grown people for absolutely no reason, at least one of your friends were mature enough to explain politey to me and apologize, but you didn't for getting everyone to attack me? that's just cruel and you block and laugh behind my back about it, real mature of you. 

grooming: your fan base is young, you forces your own fetishs and headcanons on minors, to be exact, 13-15 at maxmin, your put an bad influence on them and most likely brainwash them into your fetishing ideals. you do not care how young of minors come across your page and how badly you influence them, you do not care about minors feelings one bit because as an victim once more you thought it was funny how i got attacked by your friends through a headcannon, its grooming, you and your friends are grooming little kids, it's an pattern with your friends to manipulate and guilt trip little kids, your all adults and your doing this to little kids, grow up?

asexual fetish: as you may know, izzy is in the fnaf fandom and draws some certain things, they have an NSFW account on twitter and i have came across it, first off they headcanon freddy asexual and so they then make freddy having sex with bonnie afterwards when literally .. asexuals dont even contain in sexual things, (i have an asexual friend) and this is just fetishing asexuals now at this point too, like how are you gonna excuse yourself oh; "all asexuals can have sex" are talking about this biologically in science term because yes there is a thing called asexual reproduction, but knowing izzy they don't know certain meanings and terms, asexual reproduction is doing it individually and reproducing yourself, not reproducing with any other mate this is more so independent, but besides that freddy literally pounds bonnie in the ass and suddenly isn't asexual anymore? and saying all asexuals is the poorest fucking excuse i heard in a life time, that's so fucking stupid you gotta be stupid to be saying that, it's disrespectful to asexuals, ASNWER me this izzy, or not because you can't defend yourself okay, we all know this, what's the point of even calling Freddy asexual then? like the point of being asexual is not involving in sexual activity; your uncomfortable with sexual things; no desire in sex, so Freddy wasn't even considered asexual before but you decide to draw porn of an asexual because your only desire is to fetish around things because you think it's okay, when its obviously not. You pulled the "I never made freddy asexual!!" On your tweets, and suddenly you find an old art piece of yours and even catch your own self in a lie or im assuming you pretended not to remember, you lied to yourself (not really), but lie to your audience and you wonder you lost half your followers.

lesbian fetish: they claim that their Bonnie headcanon is bisexual enby and their monty headcanon is lesbian and trans, I see no problem with the Monty headcanon but the Bonnie one is unbelievable like, you claim they aren't lesbians but you call them "my girls!" All the time, you also claim in your last Tumblr that bonnie is based off you and he helped you find your gender and sexuality? how does taking scott's fnaf character, making it as your "own" help find yourself, when you think about this, this is really fucking stupid, I don't know how you would find yourself through an animotronic rabbit from an horror game, this is honestly giving me second hand embarrassment, also how are you referring to yourself a girl still when you also refer to yourself as he/him or they/them, don't pull the misgendering card on this either because firstly you call yourself a woman but your going by he/they so what's the point? yes gender and pronouns aren't equal but how are you gonna even refer to yourself a girl when your uncomfortable with she/her pronouns and go with he/they, it makes 0 sense, and so if your a "he/they" lesbian then your just straight, not everything has to be labeled lesbian Izzy, if your that just don't put lesbian out there for the entire world to know this for attention, this all falls with lesbain fetishing because you deny that your not feitshing over lesbians right? But always claim to go out of your way to call them lesbian and draw porn of them 24/7 sexualizing them but it's okay according to Izzy in their delusional fantasy world. 

conclusion, your fucking delusional and immature as fuck, you are damn well 18 years old on the Internet bullying minors, fetishing, and acting as child as you seem enough already, your the literal definition of second hand embarrassment and dont know what anything means because nothing clicks in your small ass brain, i wouldn't even be surprised if you dont respond to this yourself, because your a flat out pussy with being called out and get your friends to defend you because you can't defend yourself in your own battles, its really sad that you can't even defend yourself on this, because your scared and you know damn well im right about everything; gonna pull the hit block button and talk shit on your tweets what happened to "I dont want to bring this stuff on twitter.." because your using this attention seeking at this point. You realize nobody feels bad about you, I don't care if I'm being rude or not this is straight facts, your also an adult so stop acting like a fucking child and act your age it's sad to say I'm just a year younger then you and i act more mature then you, i dont spend my time playing with bonnie and monty dolls dressing them up everyday, do adults even do that.. like honestly this is so fucking sad to see, so moral of the story, grow up, stop bullying minors, and learn how to defend yourself in these situations, good day or night. 

[radialarch]

so I can't actually look at your taskmaster posts straight on bc it's like looking at some sort of like higher being and I'm simply not strong enough. But I still want to ask you about it bc I really like TM!

Do you have a favorite season? A favorite contestant? Do you have thoughts on Liza Tarbuck's final task?

asdfa;j;kl anon i'm so sorry for the unhinged tweets but this is so funny to me. how do you watch the show. liza literally said alex had "a greedy bottom" on air & i HAVE to assume alex enjoyed this because it aired! on the television show which alex executively produces! god fucking bless.

also THE TASK was to "tell the taskmaster you love him in the most meaningful way" and at no point did anyone feel the need to pause & explain why having alex sit on a cake would be meaningful to greg, presumably because every single episode prior to this one had already made it perfectly clear.

there are such delightful moments in basically every series and if i talked about them all we would genuinely be here all day but here's some quick standouts:

series 5

the songs about rosalind were SUCH bangers? mark & nish's in particular was a triumph, loved when they revealed their musical talents. overall greg's dynamic with nish was SO funny. i really enjoy when they have secret contestant-specific tasks & want every single cheeky text revealed. sally is also... so hot, my god. nail that watercooler.

series 7

everyone had such a good dynamic, greg had a fantastic time, rhod tried to strip alex every episode, just chaotic as hell. james absolutely breaking in studio, phil leaning into the dick, everyone was game for anything & it really gelled wonderfully. sidebar the nearly-nude picture of greg is GREAT, i won't let anyone say anything otherwise.

series 15

"this is a show about pedantry" frankie is so correct and his delivery is impeccable, he made me cry-laugh so many times. ivo is a hopeful puppy and i loved it every time anyone suggested he needed a refund from eton. mae is obviously the hottest of them all but kiell subbing in for coc was also a delight. a lovely cast.

series 16

how are the sues so adorable???? i love that they became bffs immediately. also susan is the CUTEST, her outfits were incredible, and rada was obviously worth all thirty grand from the way she mimed every idiom to perfection. julian's dynamic with alex, also unmatched. genuinely the unhinged energy in this one was off the charts.

[honestlywtf04]

𝐂𝐨𝐧𝐬𝐞𝐪𝐮𝐞𝐧𝐜𝐞𝐬

warning : angst, heartbreak, betrayal, swearing, crying, mentions of cheating, death threats.

summary : he may have owned up to it, but actions have consequences.

a/n: thank you to @venicebixch for reading this first and telling me to post this <3 - 💫

dear y/n,

watching you walk out of my room so aggressively and angrily, is an image i'll never be able to get out of my head.

your friends dm'ing me calling a 'piece of shit' or an asshole is something i don't blame them for. my actions have consequences.

the consequence was watching you move on. but not with anyone, but with my best friend. that shit hurts. when thomas showed me the picture you posted on your story of you and jett kissing, multiple emotions rushed through me. anger, unhappiness, heartbreak, betrayal, and so much more that i can't even put to words.

regret is something i would not feel. everything i would do, i wouldn't care about what anyone felt. but why were you the first to show me that?

why did i have to be so attached to you? why do i have to love you so much but be so stupid?

why did i sleep with her knowing that i shouldn't have?

you found out and you left. the second you stepped out of the door, it was like the ceiling was collapsing on top of me and no one was able to help me.

i felt like i was suffocating, i couldn't breathe. i was laying on the floor, disgusted with myself for hurting the one good thing in my life.

while i was pretty much dying in my room all alone, you were probably with jett. i never expected you two to be together at all.

you guys are together and now i'll never get you back. but i wouldn't expect anything else. you deserve to move on, as much as it hurts me, you deserve happiness and i hope jett is giving you that.

i miss you, i love you, and i hope that one day, you'll forgive me.

love,

vinnie the pooh

i sighed as i read the letter that i received three months ago.

when i first received it, i cried. you can't blame me, vinnie will always have a piece of my heart that will belong to him. that's the funny thing about first loves, they will always find their way back into your mind whether you like it or not.

jett and i celebrated our four month anniversary last week. you might think 'rebound' but he is far from that.

he was the one that told me that vinnie had sex with faith. he thought that 'bro code doesn't exist if he fucks up like that'.

he would spend the night at my house, rubbing my back to calm down my sobs. making me laugh at any time and any place.

as time progressed, so did our feelings. we never would've expected to be together but life happens i suppose.

as far as i know, vinnie cheated once. but that was one too many times. i don't know when or where it happened and i don't care.

my phone starts ringing 'jett❤️' is being shown on my screen. smile and answer the phone.

"hey baby, um how are you?" he asks sounding concerned.

"uh fine? why?" i ask, confused by his question and tone.

'"have you seen twitter?" he sighs. i furrow my eyebrows while mumbling a confused "no."

"i'll call you after i check it out," i hang up not allowing him to respond.

i open twitter and check whats trending. my eyes widen when i see 'y/n cheated on vinnie hacker with jett ashford' as #1 on trending.

huh?

i click on it, seeing a post of vinnie liking a tweet about someone accusing me of cheating.

my dm's being flooded with his fangirls saying 'cheater' or 'kys'

vinnie is one dumb motherfucker.

@y/n.y/l/n tweeted

i'm going live in a few minutes to explain the whole thing. the hate needs to stop.

💬 128k 🔁 70k ❤️ 259k

· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·

"hello welcome everyone," i greet, biting my lip anxiously.

'homie hopper'

'downgrade😭'

'told y'all she's a hoe'

"you know what, i'm not gonna wait for people to join," i smile in frustration.

"let me just clear the whole thing, i did not cheat on vinnie with jett. i didn't cheat at all," i sigh, trying to calm down.

"vinnie lied, and if you want proof..." i stand up to grab the letter he gave me, not noticing that vinnie and the entire hype house house joined the live.

90k people joined the live

i walk back towards my phone with the letter in my hand. "this. this letter vinnie gave to me pouring out his emotions," i hold up the folded letter.

"i will not read the whole thing but i will read one small part," i unfold it and search for that one specific sentence.

"ah! 'why did i sleep with her knowing that i shouldn't have?' " i read. i check the comments seeing what they are saying.

'she's still lying, the paper is probably blank'

'still don't believe you'

"y'all don't believe me?" i raise an eyebrow. i see that nailea and jett are watching the live so i speak, "nai please join the live for more confirmation." i accept her request.

"hey," nai smiles when she joins. "hey. now please explain the whole thing, because i don't even know it, only you and jett." she nods.

"so i went to hype because i needed to talk to vinnie about something to get you for the anniversary that your mom passed away," she starts and i nod.

"so i went there and long story short he was fucking someone, i will not get into details but i'll just say that they were doing it," i lick the inside of my cheek, wanting to ignore the fury i'm currently feeling.

"he saw me and begged me not to tell you, he was crying and shit. it was kinda embarrassing," she mumbles the last part.

"so i left and told jett, just to see if he knew about it. turns out he didn't and i'm pretty sure that's when he told you," i nod in response.

"yes, he told me. jett was there for me the entire time that i was in my room locked up thinking about what i did wrong. we started getting closer and eventually started dating, no he's not a rebound so i don't wanna hear it."

"jett and i just had our four month anniversary last week, and three months before that, i received this letter from vinnie via mail," i hold up the letter.

"vinnie, i hope you're watching this and if you're not, then tiktokroom will post this. don't send me a letter talking about bullshit then lie to your own damn fans saying that i cheated on you. you wrote on this piece of paper saying that you felt betrayed that i got with jett," i pause to take a deep breath.

"well guess what, i felt betrayed that you slept with her the same week that marked three years that my fucking mom died," i'm not sad, i'm more pissed.

"so i'm sorry if what you wanted was sex but i was mourning the loss of my mom while you were having sex with someone that wasn't me."

'damn vinnie'

'we love you y/n'

'it happened months ago why do you still care 💀'

"believe me or not, i don't care. but i know the truth and so does everyone else that i know. vinnie you are not forgiven and you'll never be. fuck you," and with that i end the live.

"it's gonna be okay," i hear my boyfriend speak from behind me. i turn around and smile at him, not questioning how he got in.

"i know it will, i just don't know what he was thinking," i sigh. he grabs my arm, making me stand up and wraps his arms around my waist.

i smile and wrap my arms around his neck, hugging him back. "i love you," he whispers.

butterflies... wait what?

"i-it's okay if you don't feel the same way, i j-just wanted to get it off my chest," he looks down, anxiously waiting for me to respond.

i smile and connect out lips, he immediately kisses back. his tense body relaxing to my touch.

i pull away, heat rising towards my cheeks at the way he's staring at me, like the only girl in the world.

i love him

"i love you too," he smiles brightly, showing his pearly white teeth.

"i. love. you." he pecks my lips repeatedly after each word, causing me to giggle.

our moment is cut short when my phone starts blowing up. "it's gonna be about him just watch," i release a humorless chuckle.

i smile at him before unwrapping my arms and grabbing my phone.

@tiktokroom tweeted

looks like #vinniehacker account got banned on all platforms, including his twitch account after seemingly lying about his ex-girlfriend #y/n.y/l/n cheating on him with his best friend #jettashford. thoughts? ☕️👀

💬 200k     🔁 150k     ❤️ 483k

vinnie's pov:

"vinnie what the fuck!" thomas yells at me. i run my fingers through my hair. i can't log into any of my accounts.

"i don't know okay! i was just so fucking pissed!" i yell back.

"boohoo your ex moved on, deal with it! get this fixed or you're out of the house!" he threatens.

"you can't do that!" i stand up. "yes i can, you wanna know why? 'cause i own this fucking house. i made this for content, and if you can't do that, then you have no place here," he mutters, looking straight into my eyes clenching is jaw.

he gives me one last look before storming out of my room.

"damn your fans really turned on you," nikita teases. i look at her with a 'not now' look.

"oop- sorry," she walks out.

i take a breath of frustration.  "why do i have to be so stupid."

"i don't know, you tell me," i hear a soft spoken voice that i've been wanting to hear for months.

i turn around and my jaw almost drops at the sight in front of me. she is actually standing a few feet away from me looking so effortlessly beautiful.

oh how bad i want to sweep her off her feet and shower her with kisses telling her how much i love her.

"y-y/n? what are you doing here?"

"we haven't talked in months and the most recent thing i've heard about you on the internet is how you said i cheated on you," she steps towards me but stops once she's about five feet away from me and crosses her arms.

"i'm sorry," i say so quietly she can barely hear me.

"for what exactly?" her eyebrow raises, waiting for my pathetic answer.

"for everything. for cheating on you, for making up lies about you, for hurting you, and for ruining the best thing i ever had," i look into her eyes. the same eyes i fell in love with. i still have hope that she has the least bit of love for me. but she's with him.

"vinnie.. i forgive you, i do."

my eyes soften at her words.

"i still love you," i blurt out, but not regretting saying it.

"vinnie.."

"no please let me talk. i fucking love you, more than anything or anyone in this world. i am so damn sorry that i cheated, i have never regretted anything as much as i regret that. you have no idea how much it pains me to see all the pictures of you and jett on social media. or seeing comments on my posts about how happy you look and it's not with me. it hurts that i can't pick you up and kiss you or even hug you. i hate myself for hurting you, i hate myself for all the struggles i put you through, i love you and i strongly believe that somewhere in your kind heart you still love me even if you don't want to admit it," unwanted tears start slipping out.

every. single. word. i said, i meant it. i love this woman, i want to have kids with her, i want her to be my wife, i just want her to be mine again no matter what it takes.

she closes her eyes to fight back tears.

"vi-nnie," her voice cracks slightly.

"i will always love you-" my eyes go from upset to hopeful.

"-but, you had your chance and there is no going back," my mouth opens a little and more tears start falling out.

"what we had was beautiful, but that's in the past now. you have to move on like me. find another person to want to have kids with, another person to call your yours, find another person for you to love and another person that you'll want to marry," her words are heartbreaking, i don't want anyone except her.

"i don't want anyone but you," i hiccup. how could she tell me to move on?

"i'm sorry vinnie, but you have to move on," is the last thing she says before walking away leaving me there. heartbroken, sobbing uncontrollably. my heart is physically in pain from her heartbreaking words. how can she think i want someone else?

"i love you and i'm proud of you baby," i hear, jett? say from the hallway.

please don't say it

"i love you too," she whispers back making me cry even harder.

author's note: feedback is very much appreciated <3

[itsrapsodia]

I'll level with you I really didn't care for mid season 1 Yennefer, she got on my nerves. I did not like her and geralts relationship (it was bad for both of them tbh, geralts coming out looking worse though by far). The thing is though yennefer's scenes with Jaskier this season were so good, they're really cute and FUNNY together. THEY HAVE ACTUAL CHEMISTRY!!! As buds AND as a couple! i normally ship geraskier but show geralt can take a long walk off of a short pier. Yenskier's growing on me

oh man I definitely have Opinions about it. (Future Raps note: this got too long and it's twn critical, so it's going under a Read More fdkjgdf)

I also didnt like Yen on 1st watch, but I did on my 2nd, and I think it has a lot to do with the timeline issue. She had a BIG change of heart from 1 episode to the next, and they tell us it's cause she's spent decades in court and realized it's not what she wanted but we as the audience dont get to SEE or FEEL that change. She later wants a kid, and a casual viewer feels like just an hour ago she was ok with giving that up to gain power, it was a choice she made and it's so weird that she regretted that (in what FEELS like) immediately after and seems to be blaming other people for it.

more understanding of the chartacter helps get her motivations better, but i think she suffered the Too Much Info in Too Little Time curse, and also from the fact that the writers love to say a lot but show very little. Sometimes they won't even say it ON the show!! They'll say it on a tweet or an interview! This makes me extremely angry, if you can't tell!!!

Yen/Geralt suffers from the same, tbh. Even worse, the push for the relationship works to the detriment of Yennefer as a character imo. In s1 we're supposed to see them as this epic tragic love story, but again we are just TOLD that a long time happened in between eps 5 and 6. We are TOLD that they're bad for each other. We see some fucking FLASHBACKS in 2 minutes, with a voice over of them explaining how they felt so bad whenever they woke up and the other was gone. It's bullshit and most people didnt get it! That's why you get 10000 fics believing that this was only the 2nd time they met and it was only a couple months later. Cause that's not how you tell a story.

And THEN we have their reunion in s2, which i still think was terrible writing. It makes sense from Geralt's pov, cause he thought she was dead, but yennefer never thought that. FDJKGNDF yen didnt even THINK about him much unless someone else mentioned him!! And when she did she was mad and hurt! WHAT'S THAT "how is this possible?" LINE, it makes no sense. Their problem wasn't solved. Geralt doesnt even fucking apologize, they dont TALK about it.

So yeah it makes no sense for her character, but it DOES make sense for PLOT PURPOSES. They needed them to be together and happy and show them with Ciri as the Happy Family they could be, so the "betrayal" would hurt more.

It also totally ruins what could've been an interesting progression of Yen's character. You know. A girl who went from pushing her friends into an eel pond cause "sometimes the best thing a flower can do for us is die" to deciding that sacrificing the life of a child for her own benefit wasn't worth it ON HER OWN, and instead gave her the line "i didnt know she was your child"

anyway. ANYWAY DFKJGNDF this got out of control oh god. I haven't had COFFEE yet it's too early for this. sorry for my ramblings. I cant even remember what the ask was about, hold on- AH YEAH. yennskier this season was great, I agree. I liked them already but now I'm fully on board, they deserve the best ❤

KJFDNG ANYWAY IM SORRY ANON, IM SALTY ABOUT SOME THINGS.

[stylistiquements]

Day 1 : Soap Bubbles.

𐐪𐑂 Pairing : Sapnap x fem!reader {Playlist}

𐐪𐑂 Summary : You're being introduce to the internet in a peculiar way, it's up to you to decide what you're going to do with it.

𐐪𐑂 Word count : 1.4k | W: written part underneath

𐐪𐑂 Warning : very few swears

Masterlist | Previous | Next

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

The coffee that sinks inside your stomach brings out a grimace and a click of your tongue where the taste stains; too bitter, too acidic but you’ll drink it anyway and to the last drop; there is something about the idea of spending time with three best friends that is so made of spring and honey that you wish to miss none of it.

“Someone is lurking,” George contemplates out loud, and the call goes silent for a second as if to look for the intruder. And it would so easy to flinch, to hit the back pedal, because you almost feel like one being exposed front stage like that. But today- today is not that day.

It's not that you don't want to join the discussion, it's that it takes a second to warm up, to absorb the energy and become one with it.

And sometimes, all it takes is Sapnap to exclaim, “Panini head, my beloved!” for your smile synchronizes with his chuckles. Somehow, once noticed by the right person, life flows back naturally.

George and Dream greets you in trailing unison, like two kids forced to greet their unwelcomed aunt on a sunday afternoon.

“H-hey troublemakers,” you finally say. Your voice is still quiet, not reluctant, but rather uncertain. It doesn't bother anyone.

“I’m beating Dream’s ass at chess and he’s bitter,” Sap explains, and you silently nod, as if they were able to see you.

A long silence follows along, rythmed by clicks of mouses and keyboards and it falls in your ears like high droplets. It's comfortable. It's intimate, shared with friends only.

"We haven't heard from you in a while," Dream says. "I mean ... before the clout fiasco."

You wouldn't exactly call it a fiasco, even though you don't really like the idea of being perceived a little too closely from the eyes of twitter.com, but you do agree anyway, "I've been caught up on college essays lately."

"That sucks," George probably adds.

“Good thing you’re here, then,” Dream notes, simple as a breath. “This is a worry-free zone.”

It hovers for a second, carried by George’s approval hum.

You squint suspiciously, detective mode, at the profile pictures that light on and off before your eyes, “Thanks, dream.”

He scoffs a “sure” and you’re not sure why you sense a bit of irony stuck on the back of his teeth. You're so tempted to call him out, but you don't. Instead, you write a mental note of this odd moment.

“It’s because I told him about your three brothers and now he’s scared they’re gonna find him and kick his ass,” Sap explains as if he just read your mind.

Sometimes, there’s this thing in the air, though you’re miles away. Something like a connection. There’s this thing when you don’t need to talk for Sap to understand. Sharing one brain cell, you dismiss ironically. Probably coincidences and predictability, but it always sounds a little special, a little like something you’d wish to be out of this world, like morning dew and fairy circles. And it makes you feel safe, at home, just like snuggling up in the sheets during a stormy night. Your smile washes up the sleeve of your hoodie, covered palm carefully hiding your chuckles.

“Three older brothers,” George muses, and there’s no telling if it’s something meant for you to hear. “That’s kinda scary.”

“You better be scared, one of them is probably your FBI agent,” you tease mindlessly, though there's nothing scary about those three grown men.

“I’m British, Bunny,” he points out. Whether the exasperation in his tone is fake or genuine, that, you can’t tell, but you play it cool, grin carved so deep it almost hurts. Dream’s wheezes rise and fall in the background.

“Say that to his face then,” you outbid smirkingly after a second of silence, heels growing into the carpet to make your chair spin slowly left and right, so breezily.

“I’d praise you for the rest of my life if you-Oooooooh your ass is wacked. Your ass is so wacked, dude. You fucked up so bad,” Sapnap chokes out between strings of giggles.

“Oh no, my streamer is losing his game?” You theatrically pout. “My streamer Dreamwastaken, have you met him? Guess you don’t need any of my brothers to kick your ass.”

“Okay yeah- no- it’s not my fault if your- they’re distracting me, okay?” Dream defends.

Slowly, the energy lowers again and the call remembers peace as Dream admits defeat.

“I’m not playing against you anymore,” he mumbles through greeted teeth, your hoodie shelters a muffled giggle. “Let’s talk about y/n’s twitter fame instead.”

“Let’s just not-” you mutter, both because seeing Dream lose at something is a miracle that has to be witnessed once and because you’re somewhat reluctant. “Let’s just not talk about that.”

“Yeah, sorry about that. I had no idea it would draw this much attention to you,” Sap admits.

“Well, you talk about her all the time it was only a matter of time before twitter finds out,” George taunts and you secretly smile, listening to the way your best friend tries to defend himself, mind flooded with the last memories you have of when you were able to see those chuckles for real.

“Yeah, Quackity already told me you guys talk behind my back,” you fakely muse. “That’s totally fine, I don’t wanna know what you guys are talking about at all.” It’s a lie, obviously, the idea creeps upon your mind with assumptions you can’t quite get a grip of nor let go.

“You and Quackity talk?’ Sapnap asks, hint of surprise, and you hum.

“Or rather, he talks to me. He keeps calling-.” Shit. The forsaken word traps itself into your mouth. It’s too silly anyway.

“Come on, just say it,” Dream pushes as if he knew too much, more than you even do, and your cheeks flush mindlessly. You don’t notice.

“Dream, quit it!” You demand.

“Quit what?”

“You talk as if you knew more than anyone did.”

“Maybe I just do,” he coos, so dream-like.

Oblivious or careless, Sapnap asks, “Is Quackity bothering you or something?”

“He-" you begin but stop to look for the right way to put it, "He triggers my flight or fight response.”

"I mean, duh," Sapnap probably rolls his eyes.

"But I like him. He's funny."

After a second of silence, George says, “Well that was unexpected.”

“Not so much, I think we’re both chaotic neutral people.”

“What is that neutral chaotic thing anyway?” Dream is confused.

Roll up your sleeve girl boss because now is your time to shine! You offer your best dream smp alignment chart to the classroom. They're speechless, but they listen carefully.

"Then you're more chaotic good than neutral. You're too sweet anyway," Sap says.

"I'd even say lawful good," George debates.

"That's because you haven't seen Bunny during her crazy cat hour."

"True," you note.

"She'll go absolutely batshit."

“What?" George burst between confusion and surprise. "We've never seen you like that."

"A lady never reveal her secrets," you retort. No one answer.

It leaves a second for your mind to enjoy peace. For your eyes to lay on c!tubbo on lawful good and think true, then on c!dream on chaotic evil and think also very true. You huff and it's like a wave; as sarcasm leaves your breath, an idea comes in.

"Sap, check your DMs," you request.

Surrounded by the evening lull, Sapnap’s laugh pops like soap bubbles, "God, you’re so stupid. Why can't you just marry me?"

“So, is it Sapnap approved?” You chuckle lightly to prevent Sapnap’s morning fresh laugh to fill your chest and leak everywhere.

“Just press ‘send tweet’ please,” he confirms with leftovers of a smile in his voice.

"George, get me out of here. They're doing it again," Dream whines.

"Doing what?" He asks, unbothered.

"Act like they're alone in the convo. Just get a room." And you don't get to stand up for yourself that you and your best friend are actually sent to another room.

"Well this one is chaotic evil confirmed," you mumble as you roll your eyes but the vibes are much peaceful, much more comfortable in here. "So ... hi."

"Hi," he chuckles in return.

Maybe that's for the best; a moment that needs to stay a little timeless, secretive and special. It hasn't happened in so long, you don't even remember the last time it did.

"I'm glad you're here. I miss you, you know?" He says, and it's hard to not feel so bittersweet about it. It's hard when longing involves a craved touch, a real smile and an eye contact. Your shoulder sinks in the chair a little harder.

"I miss you too. I'll be here soon," you promise. And soon couldn't come any sooner.

But the conversation, soft and free, will wash up any worries, as always, and you'll end up talking about everything and nothing, about streams and planned videos and college and god knows what. As long as it makes the two of you happy and smiling. Just like the old days, you'll both think and it's fair to say until the evening turns into night and night turns into fatigue.

"Are you sure you're okay about that clout?" He asks once again. "I know you don't like being exposed like that."

"Yeah, yeah don't worry too much about it. I'll try to make good use of it."

"I'm sure you will," he murmurs, but oh boy did he not know what was about to come until you two meet.

.・゜゜・　　・゜゜・　　 .・゜゜・　　・゜゜・

Taglist : @open-minded-chip-101 ; @itsoakaa ; @gaysludge

A/N : so first of all it has come to my attention that 129 days from now on is actually my birthday so that's a weird coincidence lol. Hi how are you guys?? welcome to the first part I hope you liked it. I'm fairly new to the mcyt community and that's the first time I write for them, so bear with me. Feedbacks are always appreciated. Until next time (ɔˆ ³(ˆ⌣ˆc)

[simonalkenmayeris-still-dead]

wtf dude?

I already said, Simon, that I figured out you'd probably be on my twitter after I mentioned your full name. D'you think I don't know how technology works? Do you think I didn't figure you probably have a pinger when your name gets tweeted out?

The reason I replied to that tweet is because it was retweeted by a rabbi, and I wanted to make sure she knew about the content. That's it. If her DMs had been open, I'd have done it that way. But I'm not intimidated by you.

What, exactly, am I supposed to be afraid of? Will your friends send me bees again? Scary. I mean I am allergic so ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ maybe it is.

Amazingly, I don't have a problem with you hurting me. In fact, I don't really consider that you have. Like most people, I think you're an entertainment. When you attack me, and make up stories about what I'm doing (going to do) or why I'm doing it, that's funny to me.

The part I object to is what you do to other people. The way you act on a larger scale. You want to claim you're a cryptid and that every humanoid legend in the world is based on you - to the point of cultural appropriation. Dude, that's racist. Tone it down. Put up a disclaimer. Apologise.

We explained how your characterisation comes across and you used the lizard people myth "as bait". I could have afforded you the benefit of the doubt before that, but doubling down like that makes you antisemitic.

And today you decided I can't have indigenous heritage because you saw a pic of me on my twitter. MY DUDE. You accuse me of stalking but why the fuck were you trawling through my twitter account? That's literally the only image of me on the internet, btw, but that's beside the point. You have no fucking clue what it means to be indigenous in Australia, or in any other country, I presume, since you appear to have taken one look and decided I don't count. YEAH THAT'S RACIST.

But you know what? I'm not the victim. Let me be clear, I have white privilege. I have indigenous heritage, but I don't have culture. The actual victims here are the people who did grow up with culture and who Kristina would shit on because their skin isn't dark enough for her liking.

[mariaiscrafting]

idk how to tell you that now of all times, especially when a legitimate s/a victims assault and domestic abuse survivor has had her information leaked online for thousands to view and talk about without her consent regardless if the accused are guilty or not, is not the time to be cracking the "dreamblr is a dumpster fire lmao and this is amusing to me" agenda. There are better ways to critique the reaction that aren't entirely insensitive to the situation and victim.

hmmmm 🤔

this is a legit point, so I'm gonna answer it as genuinely as possible and take the criticism to heart.

ever since certain people decided to give me piles of shit for legitimately getting angry and arguing over the dream reddit thing, I don't know if yall have noticed, but I've largely shifted the way I treat discourse. generally, I treat it all with humor, even if deep down I'm simply uncomfortable or genuinely angry, I think basically to protect myself. like I'd "laugh" and talk about "eating popcorn" during the andi thing because getting legit angry at people hurt too much. so instead, I'd just push that down and pretend I was laughing at the absurdity of the fans in the situation, because that was so much easier to deal with.

all that to say, yeah, I reacted to this manatreed shit, the very little that I knew about it, laughing because it seems kinda absurd and also to protect myself. the entire situation is straight outta my worst dystopian nightmare for internet drama, and it just generally seems insane to me how people are treating this shit, I can't even explain it or go into it all..so instead of getting angry or expressing all my disbelief, I was like, how can I twist this to be wildly entertaining? how can I glean some entertainment out of this insanity? ah yes, by focusing on how ridiculous dream stans are, including rn. and they are being so ridiculous, for so so many reasons, right? the way they actually started to disown dream when the allegations were first thought to be true, when hes done so much worse shit and also all he did was supposedly tangentially know someone who allegedly committed sa; the way they all fucking wanted to believe this rando's receipts when it was popular, and then the second the tweets saying "stop believing this rando what's wrong with you guys" got like 12k likes, they fucking turned tail and started moralizing at everyone else; the way the exact same people who are like "I feel so bad for this sa victim, stop spreading doxxing info, etc" will retweet and make those threads nitpicking every single aspect of their lives; the very fact that they are nitpicking this victim's life just for the stupidly selfish sake of making themselves feel better by absolving their fave new cc of blame so they can still stan this guy they think is hot and mysterious without the uncomfy knowledge that he might be a predator (as if that's the part that fucking matters in all of this); the fact that you all got so utterly butthurt over dream calling yall gullible, to the point that people were replying w doxxed info on his priv twt, because yall cant stand to be even slightly criticized by your uwu perfect minecraft boy and need to be coddled and babied by him at all fucking times; the extreme and hilarious contrast between the shitstorm transpiring rn and the posts not two days ago trying to look into why the dt were befriending this rando, faceless cc, like yall were on fucking csi or some shit, as if the dt arent just a bunch of trolls who like messing w you idiots bc it's funny to them.

all of this is ridiculous in the way that its painful and unbelievable and horrible and apalling. but I like to turn my incredulity into something I can laugh about instead, because I'm so done with getting angry and sad and frustrated with you idiots. Like, am I fucking angry that people are basically taking this sa victim's dirty laundry and airing it out for the sake of the next cycle of their cc drama wheel? fucking yeah. but I'm not gonna go onto tumblr and start moralizing it bc it's out of my control anyways, what the fuck am I gonna do, make a smiletwt account and start telling people off until one of my virtue signaling rants gets enough likes to be noticed? what a miserable endeavor that would be, christ 🙄 no, dreamblr is within my reach and also blowing up my dash rn, so yeah, yall are what I set my sights on.

[electricprincess96]

only on tumblr and twitter will you see people being racist towards another minority for the sake of being progressive lol

It's funny if this person (or people but I'm more inclined to think same person, multiple accounts) took a stroll over to my twitter which admittedly I have never and will never link to my tumblr because they are just separate places and I prefer they don't mix, they'd see I'm a lot more UK focused over there, and more focused on football. Whys that important because the football team I support recently had one of its players called "a fucking monk*y" by an opposition player while playing against Sla*ia Pra*ue (I'm trying very hard to not have any of their fans see this because um.... well you'll see as I explain more) during a UEFA Europa League Game. The team then came out and called my teams player a liar and preceeded to make up allegations that he was actually the one who assaulted their player. Now there's video of the guy walking up, saying something to my teams player and then 3 other players around them react to what he said, so clearly something was said and it wasn't just something innocent or otherwise harmless but they continue to deny it, their fans have sent other players from my club racist comments on social media including calling them the N Word and Monkey and Banana Emojis and made a Banner calling my teams player the N word. As well as basically harassing any of our fans or fans of other British Clubs who have attempted to speak out about this. Thus far UEFA, the European Footballs Governing Body has not made a statement (this all happened last Thursday Night).

So my twitter has primarily been calling for better treatment for blacks especially in Europe, with a focus on Black Athletes in Europe and stricter punishments for people and clubs who partake or encourage racist behaviour (such as how this players club instead of even saying they'll investigate, went straight to victim blaming even though other people on the park heard him say it).

So that person does not know me, they can not make a snap judgement about someone and the more they go around like that the more they look like the racist (cause minorities can be racist, not just towards other minorities but in this case it is towards another minority). Just cause I don't talk about it here doesn't mean I don't talk about it period. The only reason the Asian Hate Crime thing even got brought up on this Tumblr was cause people were saying not supporting the CCP was anti Asian and I knew that was fucking dumb and I've talked about the dangers of the CCP on here before so it was an appropriate place to talk about it (also required more characters than a Tweet allows).

But yeah the whole thing seems like borderline Trolly so I can't even tell if it's real or not. Like unironically calling someone a Karen in March 2021 sets off some red flags to me not gonna lie.

[graveyarddirtseries]

Graveyard Dirt & Salt

Chapter Nine

From out of the tall, un-managed grass of the laid waste cotton field they were riding in, a ghost, a sort of shadow rose up, then another and another. Three of them, blood on their faces from a fresh kill, eyes wide at the approach of another meal.

“You're gonna grow roots sitting there.”

For six days Annie had seated herself right in front of the wrought iron gate and stubbornly refused to move. For six days she screamed whenever someone would try to move her. Sure she came to eat when food was ready and certainly she made a trip to the hastily constructed privy when she had to and she slept in her bed, or rather laid there all night until her rage wore her out and she fell asleep.

But when she wasn't eating, shitting or sleeping, she was sitting in the same ass groove worn into the grass and sullenly staring out at the world beyond the gate.

Easing down beside her, the Lieutenant peered down the same worn cattle trail she was peering down and sighed.

“You know where Halloween pumpkins come from?” He asked the girl.

She seemed to ignore him.

“They used to be turnips, you know. Was a fellow named Stingy Jack, you know him?”

Again Annie seemed to ignore him.

“Well, anyways this man was a rotten sort, used to play all kinds of tricks and schemes, loved to drink. Anyways, one night Jack is at the bar, drinking and he runs out of money. Well, old Jack he wasn't ready to turn in, but at that moment the Devil comes by, checking up on the sinners at the bar and old Jack says to him 'I'd sell my soul for one last drink'.

The Devil thinks this is an easy one and turns himself into a sixpence – do you know what a sixpence is?”

Annie shrugged.

“It's like money from England...well, I think this story is Irish, but...do you know where Ireland is?”

Annie was still.

“Well, anyways, the Devil turns himself into a coin for Jack to buy his last drink with, but old Jack is a wily sort of old bugger, so he buys his drink and then steals back the Devil coin and shoves it into his wallet next to a silver cross he had been carrying, trapping the Devil in his wallet.

The Devil cried out 'let me out, let me out!' And Jack said he would if the Devil promised not to return to claim his soul for ten years.

Well, ten years pass and Jack is out walking on a dirt road one night and the Devil comes up to collect what's owed.

And old Jack says, 'I'll go, but first you have to get me an apple from that there tree'.

The Devil huffed and stomped his hoof, but figured it was easier that fighting old Jack, so he hops up into the tree to get Jack an apple.

As soon as the Devil is in that tree, Jack takes out his pocketknife and carves crosses all around the trunk of the tree, once more trapping the Devil.

'Let me down, let me down!' Shouts the Devil.

'I will, but you got to promise that you won't take my soul from me until I die of old age', says Jack.

The Devil, getting irritated at this point, huffs and agrees.

Well, some years later, old Stingy Jack dies and he gets to the gates of Heaven and Saint Peter says, 'no, can't come in, Jack. You were mean and drunk, and you cheated and you tricked people. You can't come in.'

So old Jack goes down to Hell to see if he can get in there. It's cold and lonely wandering the earth as a spirit and Hell is very warm.

Well, the Devil himself comes to the gates of Hell and he says 'no. I don't want you here, Jack. You're mean and spiteful and too tricky for even Hell.'

Old Stingy Jack considers this and finally asks the Devil, 'well, what do I do then?'

And the Devil says, 'you go back where you came from and you walk the earth'. And he throws an eternally burning ember from the fires of hell at Stingy Jack.

And old Jack he puts that ember in a hollowed out turnip he had in his pocket and he walked the earth. They say to this day old Jack is out there, tricky and sly, wandering the earth with his Jack O'Lantern.”

Annie sniffed to hide a small grin that was threatening to break on her face.

“Benny's like Jack,” she whispered.

“He sure is and he will always trick the Devil.”

Annie gazed back out at the cattle trail, her big, dark eyes taking in the world beyond the gate like a raven perched on the branch of a tree.

“When will this all be over?” She asked him.

The Lieutenant was startled. He thought maybe Annie knew that this was how things were now, but then again she was just a wee thing. Small and young.

“Oh, sweet pea, this is how things are now. There is no over.”

She was quiet, soaking in this information, before she said, “I just want to go home.”

“Where's home?” He asked.

Annie frowned, her face still.

Somewhere outside the wall a bobwhite warbled it's funny little shriek.

The child beside him stood up and took a small step towards the gate.

“I'd stay away from the gate, sweet pea,” the Lieutenant warned her, also getting to his feet.

Again the bobwhite shrieked and Annie hurried to the wrought iron, pressing herself against it to peer out. She tweeted back, a sweet little trill that the Lieutenant couldn't place.

From out of the bush lining the cattle trail, Benny emerged, still dressed in the cassock and grinning, hands up so Sister Dymphna on the wall wouldn't shoot him.

“Good morning,” he greeted casually.

“No shame in coming back defeated,” the Lieutenant teased cautiously, mildly panicked that the man had returned so quickly. Had he been forced to give up their position? Was he compromised?

“Hey, Cordelia,” Benny greeted the child at the gate, reaching through to tickle her cheek.

She pulled away quickly, angry at him for leaving her.

Catching Sister Dymphna who was descending from the wall to open the gate, the Lieutenant held her off from her task for a moment.

“Why are you back?” He asked the shorter man.

“Well, I scrubbed the mission, but...I brought gifts.” Benny explained.

“Guns?” The Lieutenant asked.

Benny grinned. “Sort of. Just...take it easy, okay?”

“Alright.”

“Okay, it's clear, come out!” Benny shouted over his shoulder.

The Lieutenant dropped his shoulder enough so he could slide his rifle off if he needed, as out of the woods came nine people, all of them with their hands up. He still instinctively dropped his shoulder further, preparing for trouble.

“Who are these people?” He hissed at Benny.

“They're friends.”

“You brought people back to the convent?!” The Lieutenant snarled. “You compro-”

“Calm down,” Benny said. “I wouldn't endanger Cordy. She's the only one I like. These people and us have one thing in common. We want this woman stealing group dead. Now let us in.”

The Lieutenant held Dymphna back again, putting her behind him, where Annie was being shoved too.

“I ran across them in the middle of gunning down a group of these men who were trying to steal a couple of their women,” Benny explained. “Let us in. Please? We need to talk.”

“They leave their weapons outside the gate.” The Lieutenant bartered.

“Sorry, but no.” One of them said. He had a voice like the thick black smoke of a forest fire, the kind with embers and a danger.

Studying his marine gear, the Lieutenant asked, “are you a fan or a real marine?”

“Corporal Angel Delgado, I was posted at HQ, I know of you, Lieutenant Vancoughnett.”

“Delgado?” The Lieutenant racked his brain, there were enough marines at HQ that he could only catch the taste at the tip of his tongue on who the man was.

“Hey, Cajun,” Benny said firmly. “Look at me.”

The Lieutenant looked over at the fancy man.

“Trust me, okay? You want these people inside.”

“It's not my convent,” he finally said.

“I'll get Mother Mena,” Dymphna offered, she tried to take Annie with her, but the girl collapsed on the ground in non-violent protest, becoming dead weight.

Benny chuckled. “I taught her that.”

The Lieutenant remained quiet, taking in everything he could of the group of people behind Benny. Delgado was a marine, so he assumed the woman to his right was as well. There three other women, four men. They didn't look very threatening, they looked tired and hungry and two of them had instruments strapped to their backs.

Mena sidled up beside him, as quiet as a kitty cat and eyed them for a moment, before saying, “welcome. You can come on in. But this is a place of peace, please be mindful of that. Dymphna, please get the gate.”

As the gate was opened, Benny strode inside, the others following him slowly. As they passed the Lieutenant, one of them, a young man with dark hair sort of puffed up his chest at him with a smug grin and kept walking. The two with the instruments brought up the rear, both of them tipping their hats to him politely.

The Lieutenant made sure the gate was locked and secured, and Dymphna was back on the wall, before he followed the group, heading for the church Annie sullenly walking beside him.

Inside the church, he took a seat in the back with Annie, feeling like it wasn't his rodeo anymore. The convent was Mena's, the group was Benny's, he was just muscle, he supposed.

Benny, ascending the pulpit, grinned down at the others. “Good morning,” he said like a priest preparing to begin his sermon, and as he was dressed, the Lieutenant almost could forget the purpose of them being there. “Alright, let's get into it. Abbess, I missed you. You look cute in that yellow blouse, did the Lieutenant find it for you?”

“The point, please, Mr. Malone?” She insisted.

“Long story short, these people are in need of shelter, a home. In return they've agreed to help us find these men who have been stealing women. And they've already given us a peace offering.”

“Which is?” The Lieutenant asked.

“We have a prisoner, tied up in an upstairs closet in the farmhouse nearby, he can give us what we need to get these men. The position of their camp.”

“Are you seriously having a fucking meeting without me?” Grayson burst into the church, along with several of the nuns.

“That was faster than I hoped,” Benny murmured. “Hey, Grayson, I see you're still alive.”

“Fuck you, Benny!” Grayson shouted, storming down the aisle.

As he passed by the young, dark haired man from the new group, the other young man reached out and grabbed Grayson by the back of his shirt, yanking him down hard and holding him there.

“Shut your face, you're in a church, dipshit,” the dark haired man ordered. “Go on, Father.”

Not quite liking this man pushing around Grayson, the Lieutenant stood up and moved to rescue the boy, taking him back to sit at his side.

“Go on, Benny,” he said.

“Well, that's pretty much it. We have a good chance to get back Haley, Laila, maybe any other woman who've been taken by these men and in exchange, the nuns get some company here at the convent. More guns, more people.”

“Less food,” Mena added calmly. When everyone turned to look at her, she stood up almost meekly and made her way to the pulpit, crossing herself quickly before Jesus, before moving to stand beside Benny. “Less space. I certainly hope your friends are willing to work.”

“We won't freeload,” Delgado assured her. “These walls look nice enough to keep us invested in the place.”

“I'm saying,” Mena continued, “we of course will provide shelter and aid, but if we want to winter in contentment, we'll need to bring back more food to supplement our garden and our coop.”

“If one of the new group can help me hunt,” the Lieutenant began, “we can dry some meat for the winter months.”

“Yo!” The dark haired young man said.

“You can't hunt, Kane!” The young man with the glasses who sat beside him said.

“Can you, Auggie? No? Then shut the fuck up.” Kane said.

“Greene and I can help hunt,” Delgado said.

“Well, protein is a good start, but we'll need vegetables, fruit. Our peach tree does what it can, but it won't see us all through the winter.”

“We can find farms that have trees and visit them come harvest time,” the Lieutenant offered. “And any canned food we come across will be brought back to the convent.”

“You sound like you're in, Cajun,” Benny said.

“I have to admit, I'm attracted to the idea of more capable guns around here, but...no offence, I know nothing of these new folk.”

“We know nothing of you either, Lieutenant,” Delgado said.

“Whatever happened to jarhead brotherhood?” Benny asked.

“Well,” Mena broke in. “If we can all manage to get along, then I have no problems with newcomers. But I have a few rules we need to keep to here. This is Holy Ground, my nuns won't be assaulted or have vulgar language or actions taken upon them. I won't expect you all to tend to mass, but you're welcome if you want. Please respect that this is a convent first and foremost.”

“Jesus,” one of the woman from the new group murmured.

“Guess that'll put a stop to your weekend catting, huh Saph?” Kane teased.

“Keep your head straight,” the woman named Saph warned him archly.

Mena waited for them to calm down, before saying, “well, if we can oblige each other's rules, then I don't see why we can't provide sanctuary. We'll celebrate our union tonight with a meet and greet of sorts.”

“A meet and greet?” Delgado asked, his tone was a little more accusatory. These new people were decidedly rougher around the edges than the Lieutenant and the nuns were, it was clear.

Mena sort of shifted nervously under his dark eyed gaze. “Uh...well, I don't...I'm not sure what to call it in the end of days. I'm sorry.”

“No, I – I wasn't being mocking, I'm sorry...we've been in a completely different land than you. It'll take a while to get civilized again.” Delgado said hurriedly, sounding almost embarrassed. “I think a small...thing might be good to mingle our group with yours. Get everyone accustomed to each other.”

Mena nodded. “Alright, then. Now, do any of you need medical treatment or...I see you're pregnant, darling. Do you need prenatal care?”

“I've got my vitamins,” the pregnant woman said. “Thank you.”

“Our people are in good shape, Medicine Man Jack keeps us running,” Delgado said. “We just need some sleep somewhere safe. And food would be wonderful. But don't think we're planning on just sitting around, we will work for that food. We'll chip in on chores.”

“You have a doctor among you?” Mena asked.

“Forensic Pathologist, actually, Jack was in the army as a surgeon too, so he's good at wear and tear fixes. Nothing major, so I hope no one needs brain surgery or open heart.”

“Maybe he wouldn't mind working with our Sisters Mary Monica and Mary Claire, they both have some nursing and hospice training, I'm sure they could benefit from more training.”

The man with the wide brimmed, black hat nodded his agreement. He wouldn't have been the one the Lieutenant would have guessed to be the doctor among the group. Especially with the banjo on his back and the almost Amish fashion he wore on his slender frame.

“Why don't you introduce yourselves, Corporal? So we know who we're bringing in to our flock?”

“Pfft,” Kane – the dark haired young man exhaled.

“We...uh...have pressing matters, another time maybe,” Benny interrupted, motioning to the Lieutenant to join them as he hopped down from the pulpit, heading for the door.

“I will not be blown off, Mr. Malone,” Mena argued, following him down the aisle, everyone, literally the entire two groups, following as well.

In the rush of the crowd, the Lieutenant scooped up Annie, who was still sulking, but allowed herself to be carried instead of getting crushed. He didn't like how fast it was all moving, not that he wasn't used to fast paced, only that he was still a little shaky on his trust with these new people.

Grabbing hold of Dymphna just outside, he eased Annie down and whispered, “keep your eye on these people while we're gone, yeah?”

She nodded.

“And tell the others to keep their weapons on them, they don't have to be menacing, just...cautious.”

Again she nodded. “Will we be okay?”

“I'm eighty percent.”

“Eighty percent yes or no?” She called after him as he hurried to catch up with Benny and Delgado at the gate.

He side eyed a few of Delgado's people, who were milling around awkwardly nearby, as he passed.

Mena joined them just as the Lieutenant did and the four of them stood for a moment at the gate.

“Where are you going?” Benny asked her.

“With you.”

“Not outside the walls, Sister.”

“It's Abbess, please? And I have just as much right to be in on all of this as you, since you decided to start playing fast and loose with our convent supplies. No offence,” she added to Delgado sweetly.

“A little taken, but I get the frustration.” He replied.

“No.” Benny insisted.

“I'm not even going to talk to you anymore,” Mena stated, frustrated.

“Get your weapon, yeah?” The Lieutenant told her. “We'll wait.”

Mena narrowed her eyes at him.

“I promise. We'll wait,” he assured her, grabbing Benny by the hem of his cassock.

As Mena scurried off, Benny yanked his cassock hem back and said, “she can't come. Absolutely not.”

“Why?”

“Because I promised to let this asshole go if he told us everything, so we're going to just let him walk then shoot him dead.”

The Lieutenant glanced in Mena's direction. “Well, shit. We can't leave without her now, she'll kick us all out.”

“Why does she want to come anyways? Have you been letting these nuns loose?” Benny demanded.

“They're free to come and go as they like and...yeah a few of them have been coming with me on hunts and such, I thought it would be best to get them used to the outside world.” The Lieutenant said. “And what the fuck does it matter to you? They need to toughen up.”

Benny nodded angrily, agreeing with him, but clearly not liking it. “Fuck...shit. Yeah they do.”

“What do we do then?” Delgado asked.

The Lieutenant exhaled, he didn't know. This was Benny's fucking mess.

“Okay, we get the information from him, I walk off with him into the woods and strangle the fucker.” Benny said, removing his cassock, possibly to prevent anyone from catching him by the hem again.

“Or,” Delgado added calmly, “we just interrogate him in a room away from her. Shoot him and say he lunged us.”

“That's easier. That'll work.” Benny said, suddenly snapping at the Lieutenant. “Why are you looking at me with a face like a slapped ass?!”

“I'm not,” he argued lightly.

He was, but he wanted to argue a bit. It was an entirely different plan set in motion now. Not a bad plan, just an entirely different one. And, yeah, maybe he hated that it wasn't his plan. Maybe he was a little pissed that it was the fancy man who saved the day for once.

Instead, he turned to Delgado, who was gazing at him with calm, almost thoughtful brown eyes.

“Are your people gonna be okay here on their own?” He asked.

The Corporal nodded. “They're adults.”

“That pregnant one looks young,” the Lieutenant said.

“Hazel, yeah she's our youngest, sixteen. She's a good kid though, quiet and doesn't complain.”

“Who's the father?” The Lieutenant went on with his interrogation dressed up as concern.

Delgado eyed him calmly, before saying, “no one in our group, if that's what you're thinking.”

Mena returned, her giant kitchen knife in hand, empty rucksack on her back. “Ready,” she said.

“Stick close,” the Lieutenant said to her. “Remember what I told you.”

She nodded.

“It's kind of neat, we have three horses stashed in the barn to take back to the convent and everything,” Benny said as they entered a bedroom at the top of the stairs in the farmhouse.

“These men have hor-” The Lieutenant stopped short as a moan came from the closet.

All four of them stopped in their tracks and just stared at the white door.

The moan came again and it wasn't human. Still the four of them just sort of stared in disbelief at the door.

“Hey, dipshit!” Benny finally shouted at the door, kicking it lightly.

The door shuddered in response as the man on the other side threw himself at it, letting loose another familiar moan.

“Shit,” Benny swore, stepping back, circling in a quick pacing motion, before stopping.

Delgado placed his hand on his hip. “He's dead.”

“Fuck!” Benny swore louder.

The door rattled again.

“I knew we should have gotten the information out of him last night!” Benny yelled. “But you wanted to wait!” He pointed at Delgado. “Now that asshole is fucking undead from a stomach wound and we just lost our lead!”

The Corporal blinked at him. “You asked me to offer up my people to fight for you. I wasn't going to do so on blind faith. Sorry, Abbess,” he added kindly to Mena.

She reached out and touched his forearm warmly.

Kicking in the door, slamming it into the uggie on the other side, Benny leapt on top of it and beat it with his fist for a good long time, before pulling out his pistol and shooting him until the clip clicked empty.

Everyone was quiet, their ears ringing in the small room from the shots.

Mena, who had covered her ears at the sight of the gun, lower her hands and looked panicked at the Lieutenant.

“I'm sorry,” Benny apologized, standing up, much calmer than he had been, running a hand through his hair and putting the greasy strands back in place. “That was unfair of me to blame you, Corporal.”

“It's fine,” Delgado said. “But we'd better get moving, those shots will have gotten us some attention.”

“Let's the horses and get the fuck back,” Benny said softly, almost as though he were ashamed of himself or the situation.

The Lieutenant actually felt bad for the man. He was just after these men because they posed a threat to the survivors of the area, namely his nuns, but Benny had lost someone to them. Benny didn't seem the type to make honest-to-god connections with people, so it seemed like when he did, he was attached for life.

He clapped Benny on the back as they left the room, trying to comfort the poor man.

Benny was quiet, but didn't shove his comforting gesture away, just sort of slumped his way down the hall.

“Ever been on a horse, Abbess?” Delgado asked as they saddled the creatures as quickly as they could.

Mena shook her head. “No.”

“Me neither,” he said. “Guess we'll both learn something new today.”

“Cajun?” Benny asked. “You ride?”

“Never.”

“Fucking Cajuns,” Benny replied, swinging up onto his horse easily. “Just like riding a bike.”

“These bikes bite, don't they?” The Lieutenant asked, eyeing his horse warily.

Benny's horse whinnied and side stepped in agitation at the new, unfamiliar rider and Benny almost fell off.

Laughing, the Lieutenant attempted to copy Benny's movements up and into the saddle, adjusting himself down below to a comfortable position, before turning to offer a hand to Mena.

She was already being hefted onto Delgado's horse by the Corporal, sitting in front of him, holding the horn nervously. So he instead pulled Marie off his shoulder and holstered her into the fancy rifle holster attached to the saddlebag.

“Alright, little kick to get them going,” Benny instructed. “Pull this way to go this way, pull this way to go that way, pull both back to stop. If your horse gets spooked, it's probably because of a snake or the undead, hold on like hell and they'll get you away to safety, but they may buck and if that happens? Eight seconds.” He added with a grin at his own joke. “Yup!” He nudged his horse into a trot, out of the barn.

“Fucking Texian,” the Lieutenant cursed, nudging his own horse to follow.

“You know I used to be better at this,” Benny murmured as they rode, keeping to the woods, not deep enough to wear the horses out with rough terrain, but deep enough to avoid the living.

“Riding?” The Lieutenant asked.

“No, tactics. You retire from the army, you get fucking twenty pounds fatter, you sit at home, you watch daytime television, your mind rots and then this happens and you fucking fail at the only thing you were ever good at.”

“We all grow older, Mr. Malone,” Mena said softly. “You did what you could.”

Benny was sullen on his beautiful black and white paint.

“I don't know you well, Father,” Delgado said. “But...I wouldn't have done anything different from what you did.”

“Thanks strange marine,” Benny said almost sarcastically.

“Hey, Texian,” the Lieutenant offered, hoping to cheer up the poor little fancy man. “You got yourself a horse and...isn't that all a cowboy needs?”

“Fuck you, Cajun,” Benny murmured. It was without feeling and quite unlike him. “I'm out of bullets, I'm out of ideas. I don't know. Maybe it's time to die.”

It was a joke, but a dark one and no one else was laughing.

“How about one yeehaw while you're on that horse?” The Lieutenant kept pressing, knowing he was getting somewhere with the teasing.

Benny's eyes shone a little in amusement, though he still looked disappointed.

“Just a soft one? For me?” The Lieutenant went on.

“I'll give you a fucking yeehaw,” Benny grumbled. Turning to Mena, he said, “I have to admit, Abbess, I'm shocked at you. I thought you'd jump up my ass and stay there about that man back there.”

“About how you allowed him to die?” She inquired archly.

“So you are mad?” Benny asked with a small, almost proud smile.

“Mr. Malone,” she began in that way that the Lieutenant knew was her gearing up to scold. Both Benny and the Lieutenant also geared up, bracing for the blow, and even though he was new to their dynamic, even Delgado seemed to steel himself in preparation.

But she didn't follow it up with anything.

Abbess of the Veil of Tears of the Sacred Virgin Convent, Mother Mena, petite and polite, just sat on the horse in front of Delgado and gazed long and hard at the horizon before them.

The Lieutenant was peering at her from his own horse, and Benny dropped over his own saddle horn to peer past the Lieutenant to join in on the staring.

Both men exchanged a curious look at each other, before Benny prodded, “Abbess?”

“There's so much death and dying in this new land,” she began softly, all fire gone from her tone. “I can't bring myself to care much.”

There was a second, only a beat really, before Benny said, “well, now, that sounds like the tone of someone who's defeated!” His loud, overly friendly, almost mocking voice rang off of the surrounding hills and hit back at them hard. It was too plastic, too fake. Just like the Lieutenant, Benny didn't like to hear Mena sound so...apathetic and it must have chased his own defeated attitude off.

Yelling, scolding, even a sermon, was better than this apathy from Mena.

“Dead,” Delgado warned, just as his horse nickered uncomfortably, prancing closer to the Lieutenant's.

The smell was in the air, something rotten, something that wasn't just an old stump in the woods.

From out of the tall, un-managed grass of the laid waste cotton field they were riding in, a ghost, a sort of shadow rose up, then another and another. Three of them, blood on their faces from a fresh kill, eyes wide at the approach of another meal.

Slipping down from his horse, the Lieutenant tossed his reins at Benny and said, “get the others back to the convent. We need to protect the horses.”

Mena struggled against Delgado's arms, and hopped down too to join him.

He didn't have time to tell her to get back on the horse, just pulled her behind him.

She welded her knife though and while she obeyed his wordless order to get behind him, she peeked out from around him to keep an eye on the rapidly approaching dead.

Benny and Delgado were long gone and it was fine, the Lieutenant was used to this new land, but he didn't care for the fact that Mena had to hop down with him. She would be one distraction he didn't need.

But she was here and today seemed as good a day as any for her to learn the hard way about the dead.

Kicking the first one to reach them square in the chest, he sent it back into the others hard, the one at the back collapsing.

Among the snarls and almost hisses of the dead, he heard Mena gasp and chanced only a quick glance over his shoulder, to find the grass rustling to their right as well. More dead.

“Run,” he commanded her, killing one of the uggies that lunged at them with his own knife, before shoving her hard in the direction the grass wasn't rustling in.

She screamed as another of the dead came out of the grass, toppling her and sending them both into the grass to disappear.

With no option, as the uggies were at his heels, he swept into the area the two had tumbled and stomped hard on the uggie's head as it struggled to get to its feet beside Mena who was laying on the ground.

She leapt up and joined him in running towards the woods, but not before punching at one of the dead that had caught up with them. It sent it off course, but didn't topple it. They were so close to the trees, but he knew they wouldn't make it, the dead were already grasping at the backs of their shirts. Grabbing Mena by the upper arm hard, he shoved her ahead of him and stopped, allowing the five dead to topple him, letting his feast be the distraction she would need to escape.

He kicked and punched hard at the group, stuffing his marine issued boot into the mouth of one that was at his legs, preventing it from biting, trying to avoid being bitten by the others using his knife to block any mouth that was thrown at him. It was a battle he was losing fast, there were too many. One of the uggies dropped to the ground heavily beside him, then rapid gunfire and the rest were dropping fast. Scrambling back and away from the pile of dead, he looked himself over for a bite, the action happening too fast for him to notice anything.

Mena was at his side, helping him up, her knife black with the dead's blood.

“Come on,” she urged him, yanking him towards the woods.

Just inside the tree line Delgado had stationed himself up in a tree and was holding his hand down to them to help them up into the old oak. He was so fucking welcome into the group at that moment, hand held down to them, rifle in his other.

Mena first, the Lieutenant ensured that, pushing her up, before following.

“Did they get you?” Delgado asked.

Still looking over his arms, in the safety of the tree as more dead emerged from the grass to gather below, he shook his head. “I don't think so.” He checked and rechecked for a bite, hands shaking. It was close, too close. He had been so damned careful, but that was...it was too close.

“You're lucky you were heading for me,” Delgado murmured, between taking shots at the uggies. “You would have been dead.”

“Thanks,” the Lieutenant breathed. He assumed the man had jumped off his horse as well, sending Benny on to the convent. And he was fucking grateful for the other marine.

Sitting on a branch above them, Mena was quiet.

Reaching up, the Lieutenant tweaked at her booted foot, trying to put her at ease, comforting her the best he could.

“You okay?” He asked her between shots.

She nodded, wide eyes on the dead below them.

“It's okay,” he said. “There can't be that many, Delgado has the ammo to put them all down.” Unless there's more out there and they're all coming to the sound of the shots, he thought, but kept that to himself. It was only then that he realized he didn't have Marie on his back and remembered putting her on the fucking horse in the rifle holster.

Great place for her, you fucking couyon.

There was only five or so left, so he turned to Mena.

“Once these uggies are put down, we have to climb down and run like hell,” he ordered, feeling like the CO he was once more. “There could be more headed this way, we stay close together, we don't stop running until we hit the convent or some kind of shelter. Do you understand?”

She nodded.

“Yes?” He urged needing an auditory agreement that she understood his orders.

“Yes.”

Three more left and the Lieutenant tried hard to ignore the way his branch was cracking under his weight, only three more. It gave out at two left and despite him trying to grab another branch, he fell straight down with the branch, collapsing on one of the uggies below hard. So hard he heard the poor uggies ribs crunch. Delgado shot the last one as he stabbed the poor dead woman in the eye and put her out of her misery, before getting to his feet shakily. He was getting too old to fall out of fucking trees that was for damned sure, but he was grateful for the uggie that broke his fall.

Jumping down, Delgado gave them cover as the Lieutenant reached up and helped Mena down. Then the three of them ran as a unit, into the woods, away from the tree and the tall grass.

Keeping Mena in front of them always, the Lieutenant found Delgado keeping pace with her, hand holding her upper arm. The man had flawlessly moved into the proper position for protecting a civilian from gunfire and for a moment the Lieutenant was a marine again. It was nice to have that trained companion who knew how protocols worked.

They moved through the woods as fast and as carefully as they could, before they stumbled into the clearing where the lagoon for the convent was. They weren't far, but coming up the ass end.

At the sight of the wall, the Lieutenant actually exhaled the breath he had been holding and with Delgado's help, they boosted Mena up onto the wall first, before the Lieutenant stooped down for the other man.

Once all three were on the wall, they sat down and just took a moment.

He looked himself over once more, paranoid a little now that he had been bitten, but he saw nothing but scratches from the branches of the tree and a few dings from the fall. His ankle hurt a bit, but he would be back to one hundred percent in a few days.

“Any battle you can walk away from, huh?” He asked Delgado.

The other marine looked at him with his serious, dark eyes, before a small, almost bashful, dimpled smile spread over his face.

Giving one last, dramatic exhale, the Lieutenant hopped gingerly down from the wall and held his arms out for Mena, but again, Delgado had beaten him to her, easing her down, his hands holding hers, before he hopped down himself.

“You alright?” The Lieutenant asked Mena as they walked around the church.

She nodded, pale and drawn, but seemingly alright.

Grasping hold of his hand before they could emerge from the five foot space between the church and the east wall, she pulled him back into the shadows and peered up at him sombrely.

“Thank you,” she said sincerely, brown eyes so wide and so sweet as they gazed up at him. They were so dark and eternal in the shadows of the church that he swore he could see stars sparkling in them. “I'll never forget how you were prepared to die for me.”

Delgado, sensing he wasn't supposed to be there, just sort of slunk off, leaving them alone.

The Lieutenant didn't know why she was thanking him. He never understood the gratitude. He was trained to save lives, to protect, it wasn't just killing and war, though those were the unsavoury aspects of it. He was a marine, he joined to save lives. His life didn't matter, he wasn't a family man, he didn't have any reason to be alive other than protecting this convent and its people.

Mena, he supposed, more than any other. She was more important around here than him. She had nuns that needed her leadership.

Not good with serious talk, with real emotions, he chucked her playfully on the chin and said, “you did good out there, kid.”

“Lieutenant,” she began, but he was already heading out from behind the church.

Benny came up to them, smiling at first, before calming himself and saying, “gotta play hero, huh? That's gonna get you killed someday.”

“It was almost this day,” Mena stated.

“How's my horse, fancy man?” The Lieutenant inquired with a grin.

As they rounded the church, standing in front, heading for the gate, the Lieutenant noticed Delgado standing with his people in a tight circle, the survivors from his group having hardly moved from where they had been left.

Making a straight line for the new group, the Lieutenant found some nuns also heading in that direction, knowing they would get filled in there.

“So are we being asked to leave then?” One of Delgado's people asked.

“No,” Mena answered for the marine. “We aren't making anyone go anywhere. We still have the agreement than you'd help us in dealing with these men and to be honest I would never turn away anyone who needed shelter and safety here. I just ask that you pitch in with chores. Have you been offered tea or water?” She asked.

They nodded.

“Have you been fed?”

They shook their heads.

Mena frowned, but only offered the nuns with them a small, withering glare, before saying, “well, then let's go inside the cloister and get you something to eat. We can have an early lunch.”

“I'll have to skip hunting today,” the Lieutenant said. “Until the area is calmed down, somewhat. All the shooting and commotion probably scared away the game anyways.”

“Good,” she said. “You can work on digging us another privy hole.”

“Latrine duty, huh?” He asked with a small grin. “For saving your life?”

“For being reckless,” she replied coolly.

He nodded, properly stripped down. “Alright.”

“I can help with that,” Delgado said. “Jack, Billy? Let's get you working with the nursing nuns.”

“That would be Sisters Mary Monica and Mary Claire, they're in that building over there. It's the infirmary, but first your people eat.”

As Mena led the new people away, the Lieutenant watched their retreating backs, the gears in his mind already turning.

“Why's she's pissed at you?” Benny asked, coming to stand with him.

“I don't know,” he lied.

“Well, enjoy the doghouse, dipshit,” the shorter man scoffed, heading after the others.

“Why are you mad now?” He called out after him.

Benny turned in his tracks, walking backwards. “Because you didn't need to jump down from your fucking horse. We could have outrun the dead. You have a hero complex or a death wish. And you need to fix your shit!”

“So what? You wanted us to run the horses here and lead the dead to our door? Was that your plan?”

Benny turned around and scowled darkly, folding his arms. “Is this about me bringing these people here?”

“Look,” the Lieutenant began diplomatically. “We both fucked up today. Let's call it a scratch match.”

“We need to get our shit together,” Benny agreed.

Exhaling a sigh, the Lieutenant knew Benny might be right.

[payidaresque]

Ramo fans also joined Damlas fans into piling on the hate on both the show and Simay & Murat. They literally created fangroups/chats on twitter whilst Aziz was on as they always managed to coordinate the timing of their hate comments together (make sure their hate tweets became more popular). This was further proved when someone posted a screenshot of the fanclubs name (it was something along the name - Lets celebrate the ending of Aziz) when @Aziz posted that the series had ended. Its literally the most unhinged behaviour.

It's honestly the only reason why I'm glad the show ended because the sickening amount of hate was vile to read.

I didn't watch Ramo live but I have some mutual friends on twitter who did and they told me some things over the past year (ill number them for you below as its easier for me):

1) A lot of fans who watched both Ramo & Aziz also noticed Murat seemed to be much happier and comfortable shooting Aziz. They would just comment saying he was glowing and much more relaxed etc. It was so obvious Ramo fans were annoyed with that behaviour as it seems like he wasnt like this during the production of Ramo. However, Ramo did have much more drama/ offscreen rumours so its understandable if this affected his behaviour.

2) There's a lot more behind the scenes stuff with Simay and Murat (pictures and videos) and ramo fans were annoyed because they didn't get the same content with him and his previous Co star. They would literally post dumb stuff about Murat being forced into smiling or fake laughing which is the most disturbing thing I've read.

I think this has a lot to do with horrific affair rumours with him and his previous Co star so its obvious he just was going to be much more comfortable on his new show and around Simay etc.

He also wished Simay a happy birthday post on instagram and said how lucky he was to have her which further proved my point that they did genuinely enjoy working together. Murat hasn't ever wished a co star happy birthday so it just shows you how content he was working with Simay 😀

3) it annoyed both fanclubs that simay was getting incredible love for her performance of Efnan. Both Murats and Damlas fans made several remarks of how Simay wasn't talented enough (before the show was aired) and how she didn't deserve to work with a talented actor like Murat 😒. They were comparing Damlas career success with Simays and how Damlas deserved to be the lead. Literally pulling out Damlas career roles and pointing out why Damla should be the main focus. They literally did lose their minds. However, God really made them spit out their words because SIMAYS was the ONLY one whose acting was consistently praised 😆 😂 🤣 Literally so funny to see how Damlas acting was not once praised by anyone (no offense to Damla but like you can't deny facts).

Ramo fans have literally sat on their high horse all year and believe Murats chemistry with Esra bilgic was impossible to beat. They literally don't want Murat to work with anyone else and have camped under his Instagram/twitter begging for season 3 of Ramo. I really don't have any words to explain to you this type of obsession.

Anyway unfortunately this kind of behaviour needs to be psychologically studied as its so bizarre to me.

sending you all my love 💓

“Let’s celebrate the cancellation of Aziz” my ass… fuck you. Literally fuck you all. So much. Assholes.

I think i just cried a bit 😭 I had a BLAST reading that, thank you so much for sending all of this to me!! 💜 All these pics and videos i've seen and posted... they were glowing. All the smiles and laughs and the energy, and how Murat was speaking of Simay... I KNEW you can't fake something like that! It's so warming to know that the cast of your favorite show actually got along so well, give me a moment pls 😭😭😭😭

But also cringed a bit because... wtf?? Dayum, they had very much free time if they were able to do all of that shit because i mean, are they for real 💀💀💀 get pissed over the fact that Murat wished Simay a happy birthday??? I think i just peed myself from laughing, thank you. What are you, 13 💀💀💀💀💀💀💀

In all seriousness, this is kind of sad, because i watched Ramo til the end and actually liked Esra very much (she has way more talent than Damla has, i can assure you of that 💀💀💀), and actually liked the plot until like mid-season 2, and reading all of that is... ouch. I guess that's pretty common for every actor in the industry to have "an affair" with their partner, i mean: 1) Murat's very handsome (i think we can all agree on that 💀 the same applies for Esra); 2) people like gossips (to a vulgar amount actually and it makes me sick); 3) when they get bored, they make up stupid shit + the plot of the show, so it's totally understandable why Murat was worried and uncomfortable during the shooting, I wouldn’t be surprised if he was annoyed even, (and i'm sure Esra was too, no less than he was) and all these horrible and unnecessary comments, rude assumptions??? Didn't make it any better. Jesus have some modesty please. People really need to stop treating other people like Barbies & Kens, that's very creepy, and disrespectful, thank you. And i think if you really consider yourself someone's fan, you would never allow yourself to do any of this disturbing shit public or private, out of respect for that person and his talent, and these people? they're not fans — they're obsessive creeps without a life who should never be allowed to use any social media for their entire lives Go outside, take a walk, be useful to society, but DON'T EVER come near a computer again. This shit is super unhealthy. I'm actually kinda intrested in what Esra's fans thought about all that drama, lolz 💀💀💀 And asking Murat for a s3.. yeah right, like he's the one in charge of that, and not just an actor who was hired to do a job 💀💀💀 be my guest, lolz 💀 That's actually embarrassing :/

You know, that's actually kind of funny, because i'm also recalling a BTS video from the shooting of Aziz, i think it was Murat's birthday, and it seemed to me that Damla & Iman are actually friends?????? So that's very funny when people are putting effort into doing all of this nasty and unhealthy stuff i mean, what kind of world do you actually live in, do you really have no respect for yourself and for the people you’re supposedly “admire”, aren’t you capable of doing anything better?

If you wanna talk or if you have any more stories to tell, no matter, my ask is always open 💜