#i can tidy ma damn room!

[kentosbabes]

I was daydreaming about this earlier and just had to blurt it out. need him so bad :(

Eren who sits next to you in Computer Science class. You never really spoke to him only small talk here and there. he didn’t have a pristine reputation, both for messing with girls and also for his constant smoking and drinking. yet when he sat next to you in class he was as quiet as anything he never made any inappropriate comments or glances, he always paid attention to the lecture and handed in his work on time.

Eren who asks you to be his partner for the assignment coming up on building an application. Although you were a little shocked at first you realized he probably picked you as you were not only the easier option as you sit next to him but you were excelling in the subject so he was guaranteed a strong grade. He asks for your number and you gladly type it into his phone saving your name with a heart next to it. you notice the moon in the top left corner of his phone, he’s put his phone on silent, and you can’t help but think about all the notifications he must be getting. you pass his phone back and he chuckles at the name placing his phone in his back pocket.

Eren who messaged you at 6pm one night of the week. ‘hey smarty wanna come round to work on the project.’ you smile at the nickname and type back ‘who is this?’ hoping to tease him and knock back his seemingly big ego. ‘it’s Eren? don’t tell me your cheating on me and got a different partner’ he responds. you finally agree to go over and follow the directions he sent you.

Eren who has a penthouse over three times the size of your own apartment. To your surprise it’s all tidy with a timeless design and floor-to-ceiling windows. ‘wow Yeager not what I was expecting’ you say as you look around ‘And what were you expecting’ he asks leading you to what seemed to be a dining room. ‘i don’t know like a decaying apartment that reeks of weed’ you say scrunching your nose at the thought. he only replies with an ‘ouch’ as he sits down next to you at the table.

Eren who has no idea what to do when you begin to type up a planning document. he gets even more confused as you begin to start coding. ‘yeager are you paying attention’ you say as you try to explain to him what is going on but he just stares at you. ‘huh um yeah something about the structure of the code right?’ he says shaking his head as you bring him back to reality. ‘why did you even pick this subject’ you ask now staring up at him batting your lashes. ‘I like playing games on my laptop’ he shrugs keeping eye contact with you ‘I get all the graphics card and PC talk it’s just the coding that baffles me’. he can only think about how innocent you look as you look up at him.

Eren who continues to meet up with you almost daily to work on the project. You meet up at one of the cafes closer to your apartment and he can’t take his eyes off you. you walked in with your hair down glasses on your nose and wearing flared jeans and a crop top doing all the right things. He waved at you so you can see him and you catch his green eyes and walk up sitting opposite him in the booth. he lets you order your coffee then says his own and puts out his card paying for the both of you ‘Eren you don’t have to do that’ you say looking at him ‘It’s my treat baby, you just worry your pretty brain about the project yeah I’ve got everything covered’ he says pocking your temple.

Eren who surprisingly takes initiative as you stand presenting your application. He says all the right things and also lets you talk about the more detailed elements. it’s no surprise you got a grade A making Eren smile hard and look over at you shaking your shoulders and repeating ‘thank you ma’ over and over. ‘damn smarty you really know your shit’ he says as you begin to pack up your things ‘i’m throwing a party later, you should come’ you shake your head no ‘oh come on mama you’ll be my VIP. I promise you’ll enjoy it' he says throwing his arm around your shoulder. You sigh out a yes and let him lead you to your next class.

Eren who mixes you up a drink and sits with you on his balcony as the apartment is filled with people dancing to loud music. he leans back on the sofa his arm reaching your waist, sipping on his beer as you both admire the view. you look over to him and find him already staring at you. 'your beautiful' he says. 'do you say that to all your girls?' you scoff turning away from him. his hand reaches up caressing your jaw and turning your face so his eyes can meet your own. his emerald eyes burning into yours as he stares at you. before you can think his lips are on yours in a soft kiss, his lips are soft and you can taste the beer on his tongue. your leg moves so you straddle him his hands still cup your cheeks as your hang around his neck. your the first to pull away looking down at him, 'speechless for once Yeager?' you tease. he only hums in response before bringing your lips back to his.

Eren who now messages you non-stop from as soon as he opens his eyes to when he sleeps sleep. he gets you to come round to his on a regular basis. He uses the excuse of needing help with a topic but just wants to have you sit on his lap cockwarming him as you attempt to explain the topic. He becomes obsessed with you needing to feel your touch at all times, from having to hold you as you do your makeup to holding your hand under the table during class. Not because he's ashamed because all he does is talk about you to his friends to the point they're sick of him. He walks with pride with his arm around your waist as you walk through the corridors.

Eren who turns up at your place drunk after a party. As soon as you open the door his head is nudged into your shoulder as he mumbles gibberish. 'Hey what are you doing here it's only 8pm shouldn't you be partying?' you question dragging him into your dorm. 'I missed you, was no fun without you mama' he says stumbling onto the couch and dragging you with him into his lap. 'you're drunk.' you say rolling your eyes. 'god baby you make me crazy.' he groans kissing your neck 'wanna make you mine'. 'okay Yeager don't go saying things you don't mean' you simply state dragging him to your bedroom. 'i mean it.' he states flopping down on the bed. 'then ask me when you sober and maybe you'll get a yes'.

Eren who's arms are still wrapped around you when you wake up. 'Morning baby' he mumbles into your neck. You turn so you can face him 'Morning handsome' you say tucking his strands of hair behind his ears. 'I believe I have something to ask you' he says now pecking kisses all over your face. 'hmm and what is that' You giggle at his affection. 'Would you like to be my girlfriend?' you both can't stop smiling as he asks. 'let me think about it' you say looking up at the ceiling Eren rolls on top of you trapping you between his arms the motion making you squeal. he raises his eyebrow as a sign to continue 'yes, yes I would'.

Masterlist

[marcelllyn]

Sleepover.

Sinopse: Você é uma babá que foi contratada para ajudar Dean a cuidar de sua irmã em uma festa do pijama.

Advertências: Nenhuma.

It has not been reviewed. !!!

English is not my first language

(Não sei até que ponto isso será mediano, afinal isso parece mais um teste do que uma história.)

 You pressed the doorbell more than three times. With a bag full of sweets and snacks that the customer's mother had asked to buy, thrown between her legs.

  It wasn't the first time you would babysit, but this time it was a little different, helping Dean, the boy you had a crush on since the moment he came to Stars Hollow, take care of his little sister at a party. pajamas. This was totally different from taking care of some babies when the mother just wanted to go to the movies or get her hair done.

  The door finally opened, a little girl opened the door with a smile from ear to ear, she had beautiful blue eyes.

— Are you the nanny? — He said, looking at the bag of goodies.

— Yes. — Picks up the bag from the floor. —Clara, isn't it?

— Yes, you can put the bag in the kitchen.

  The girl made room for you to pass. When he entered the house, the smell of cookies made his stomach growl.

— Clear! — The same voice that contacted you on the phone appeared. — Has the nanny arrived yet? — The lady, who was probably Clara's mother, wiped her hands on her teddy bear apron. — Always punctual like this? — He smiled.

  You returned the smile and went to place the bag on the kitchen counter.

— Well, I'll be leaving in thirty minutes, enough time to tidy things up until the girls arrive. She looked through the bag, making sure everything ordered was there.

— Bacon was missing on the market. — You scored.

— I noticed. — He smiled. — Let's follow the rules, no drinks, cigarettes or any type of drugs. The girls must be in bed at eleven o'clock sharp and preferably with their teeth brushed, no violent films. Let Clara choose the songs. Dean will help you with most things.

  Listening carefully to everything and nodding your head, you just smiled a fake smile.

- I understood. Before I start helping you pack your things, can you show me where the bathroom is?

— Claro, querido, é só subir.

Enquanto subia as escadas apressadamente, Clara ligou Oops!… I Did It Again, de Britney Spears. Você podia ver seu bom gosto.

Assim que chegou lá em cima, caminhou pelo corredor cheio de fotos de família, bebês e algumas paisagens de Chicago. As quatro portas estavam fechadas e, além da porta branca cheia de brilho, com um unicórnio desenhado, não havia como saber qual era o banheiro.

Seguindo sua intuição, resolveu abrir a porta do final do corredor, pensando que talvez fosse como a maioria das casas daquela rua.

Girando a maçaneta, seus olhos se arregalaram ao ver Dean arrumando o cabelo sem camisa. Você deveria ter fechado a porta rapidamente, mas ficou ali parado, imóvel como uma estátua.

Seu olhar encontrou o dele, o que fez seu transe passar, sentindo suas bochechas pegarem fogo. Ele era tão alto, bonito, cheirava tão bem e muito alto.

— Sorry. — You closed the door tightly.

Suddenly, you wonder what you wanted to do going up the stairs. Dean and you weren't complete strangers, you saw each other at the market where he worked, at school and sometimes you did group work together. But they were never one to talk about outside of those same places.

— Hey? — He smiled that damn pretty smile. —Are you looking for something?

Você não percebeu que estava parado na frente da porta dele sem dar um passo para frente ou para trás.

— Yes. — You said, looking into his eyes.

A silence fell between the two.

— And what would it be? - He laughed.

Você teve vontade de bater a cabeça na parede algumas vezes por agir como uma idiota na frente dele.

— The bathroom.

— It's right there. — He pointed to the door next to Clara's room. — Are you the nanny my mother hired? I imagined it would be some fifty-year-old lady.

— I think they're busy watching the newspaper at this time.

- Probably. — He looked you up and down. — Did you wear jeans to a slumber party?

— I don't have any decent pajama pants.

— You can take a pair of my sweatpants if you want, it's going to be hell to wear those jeans all night.

— That would be very kind of you.

It was true, sitting all night in those tight jeans would be a nightmare.

Clara's quick, heavy footsteps appeared on the stairs.

— Mom just left, she asked the two of them to go down. — She looked sadly at her brother. — Dean, why haven't any of my friends arrived yet?

— They must be late. — He entered the room and came back with black sweatpants.

Dean piscou para você e seguiu a irmã escada abaixo. Não havia mais tempo para ficar paralisado pela beleza daquele menino. Você foi ao banheiro e vestiu uma calça de moletom preta que, apesar de não ser muito larga na cintura, ficou grande demais nas pernas. Ter que dobrar a barra da calça quatro vezes.

Descendo as escadas o mais rápido possível, ele se deparou com Clara aos prantos, abraçada pelo irmão.

— They will arrive soon. — Dean said as he patted the poor girl's head.

O som da campainha dá um pouco de esperança, a menina sai dos braços do irmão, enxugando as lágrimas no moletom rosa.

— I open the door. — You say trying to sound helpful.

Quando ele abriu a porta, apenas uma menina com cabelos cacheados presos em um rabo de cavalo estava parada na porta. Os pais sorriram brevemente antes de jogar as duas sacolas da menina em suas mãos.

—Letty! — Clara screamed, jumping into her friend's arms.

— Why do children's parents check in on them if they don't come? — Dean snorted.

— Maybe they just like making other kids sad, like sadists.

Dean deu uma risada longa e sincera.

— You are so strange. — His face fell as soon as he said that. — It was not an insult.

— Dean! Come put Sleeping Beauty on television! — The girls screamed.

Ele foi, enquanto você colocava os sucos nos copos, a pipoca na bacia e os biscoitos fresquinhos no prato.

— Who is your favorite prince?

Seu corpo ficou chocado com a presença repentina dele.

— I don't know, maybe the prince from Sleeping Beauty? — He picked up the plate of cookies. — It’s just that he knows…

— To dance. — He interrupted. — My sister says that this is the best quality in a prince, knowing how to dance.

— Eu ia dizer porque ele é o mais lindo de todos e rico, mas claro que dançar faz uma grande diferença.

Vocês levaram a comida e as bebidas para a sala e sentaram-se um ao lado do outro. As duas garotas ficaram viciadas no filme. E você está obcecado pelo garoto mais lindo de Stars Hollow. Observando como ele estava lindo, prestando atenção no filme.

— I think your mother will think hiring me was a waste of money, you would be able to deal well with both of them.

— But at least I have great company. — He said with a smile on his face.

Você sorriu com o sorriso dele. À medida que o filme avançava, seus olhos ficavam cada vez mais pesados. De repente, sua cabeça estava apoiada no ombro dele enquanto você dormia pacificamente.

Okay, that wasn't the best story I've ever written. But it was something brief and quick just for me to learn how to post it here.

[1-sasha-stuff-1]

Into Another World - Mha x Reader

Chapter 6: Fever Dreams & Dinner

| | | |

After getting the address from Inko, I head home for the rest of the day until the time comes to show up at their apartment for dinner at 5:30. 

Once I arrived at the house, I unlocked the door and closed it back up right behind me, took off my shoes, and headed straight towards my room. Only halfway up the stairs do I start to suddenly feel lightheaded and in pain, ignoring it, I continue up the stairs until the pain starts to increase. 

“Yea no, I’m not doing this” I thought as I went back downstairs and into the kitchen.

As I arrived at the kitchen, my head started to pound and the pain increased tenfold, so I searched the kitchen, finding a plastic cup snatching it and filling it up with ice cold water from the sink. 

Drinking the cup of water, I was still not satisfied, so I drank more water. 

And more.

And more.

And more.

Thump

“Stupid head, stop it...”, setting down the cup in the sink after drinking some water, the pounding wouldn’t stop. 

Having the feeling that she would collapse any second, she decided against going to her room and to lay on her bed and agreed to just lay on the couch in the semi-finished living room. Upon seeing the couch, she practically dragged herself towards it and threw half of herself onto the couch with her hands on her head like a mad man.

“Damn it, why won’t it just stop?!”

Thump

Thump

Vision now blurry, she closed her eyes and sighed. 

“I guess it won’t hurt to sleep just a little……”, as those words left her mouth, she fell into a deep slumber that could rival Sleeping Beauty, but the pounding and pain in her head continued.

Thump

And continued

Thump

And continued………. Thump…………until it stopped…and voices were heard…….

Doctors were frantic as they pulled the h/c girl up from the floor where she fell from the rocking chair and onto the hospital bed where its sheets were turning a dark bloody red from her head injury, her breaths uneven and frantic as if having a panic attack. 

Oxygen

She needed oxygen and badly, she felt as if she’s suffocating.

| | |

“-where going to need another scan on her just in case somethings up with her….”

“No, it can be that it might be that when she fell, she hit her occipital lobe……”

“I think it’s best to give her this medication for now, even though it’s not as strong as the last few we gave her but enough to still keep her conscious…”

“-upgrade her health report then, so we can infor-”

| | |  

Feeling the need to wake up, she opens her eyes, but all she can see are blurred up colors in front of her, having seen enough, she closes her eyes.

| | | |

“......I think she’s starting to wake up! Connect the I-”

“-damit man! You almost lost the poor thing god dammit!”

“-y/n be, okay?”

“She’ll be okay, she’s just hurt is all….”

“Ma’am, we’ll need your family to level the room to undergo-”

“-right, come on kids….”

| | | | “Ma?” | | | |

Opening her eyes, she sits up, gasping for air.

“What the hell…...”

The pain stopped and she was relieved. But, when she was asleep, everything felt as if she was in one of those fever dreams where it felt so real…...but yet, fake?

Not wanting to think about it in case she gets another headache of some sorts, looking for the time on the clock on the wall it reads 5:00. Deciding to finally get up from the couch, she went to get ready to head over to Midoriya's home.

| | | |

Placing the plate of freshly baked cookies in one hand, I use the other to knock on the door of the Midoriya apartment.

After Inko Midoriya gave me her address, I went back home to do other things such as watching netflix and just tidy myself up before I came over, on the way, I also stopped by the bakery in town tow grab a hold of some cookies for them as a ‘Thanks for inviting me!’ thing. And besides, it felt wrong not to get them anything for some odd reason but whatever. 

I also had time to think about what I’m going to get myself into. From this point and on, I’ll start getting myself involved in some certain canon events like it or not. With that said, I need to be careful on what I’m going to be doing and saying. I can’t just go up to Midoriya and be like Oh hey Midoriya, by the way, you're going to get a quirk in like 2 years or less from your favorite hero!’.

As I started to think of more ways to avoid any of this, the door opened up to reveal Inko.  

“O-oh, L/n! It’s nice to see you again, come in, please!”, 

“It’s nice to see you as well Ms. Midoriya!” smiling, she opened the door wide enough for me to finally come in. As I am going in, she closes the door behind her, and I take off my shoes and follow after her.

“I wasn't quite ready with dinner yet, so you can just sit tight right here, okay?”, as she makes her way towards the kitchen, I stand up and follow her.

“Wait, I can help you with dinner Ms. Midoriya!”

“Oh no! You're our guest and you should sit down!”

“Don’t worry ma’am, I'm fine with helping out with dinner, I insist.”

After a bit of hesitation, she seemed to have finally got an answer to me.

“Alright, if you insist. Why don’t you grab me a spoon, it’s in the first cabinet to your right.”

Nodding, I open the cabinet and give her the spoon. Time went by and we both were just talking and laughing while making dinner. All in all, it was really fun, it felt as if I were with my original mother back home. 

Over the years, I’ve realized that as time passed by, my memory was slowly starting to fail me, and I started to forget things from the world I used to live in. It started with little things that one would normally forget such as what my classes were at that school, favorite books, etc... It quickly escalated to the point where I forgot how my friends looked. That's when it hit me that I was losing my memories of my past life. I don’t want the day to come and not remember anything of my past, I want to keep remembering, not forget, so that's when I started writing things down in a notebook I got from my trip to the mall a few months back in Tokyo, drawing things also seemed to help me out as well, not to mention that fever dream also helped my memory of my family and life back then become much clearer. Maybe that dream was a sign of something? Something I'm not getting at here?

Inko seemed to have noticed my quiet demeanor and looked at me with a concerned look in her eyes. 

“L/n, are you alright?”

Shaken out of my thoughts, I throw a smile towards the adult women while mentally scolding myself.

“Stop it, you don't need to think about that right now.”

“Yup! I’m perfectly fine Ms. Midoriya, don’t worry!”

|

|

| | |

Feeling the sudden need to use the facilities, you turn to Inko and smile awkwardly.

“Ms. Midoriya, may I use the bathroom?”

“Of course! It’s down the hall on the first door to your left.”

“Thank you!”

After having used the bathroom, you leave and go back to the kitchen where dinner was almost ready and set. Humming a tune to yourself, you didn’t realize until you bumped into something, or someone.

With the cause of the impacts, you didn’t fall straight to the floor but rather just stumbled a few feet backwards as you say an apology.

“Oh! Sorry Ms. Midoriya, I didn’t see you there!”

“U-uh? My mom is in the kitchen...”

Having heard a new and familiar voice, you perk up and see that the person you bumped into wasn't Inko, but it was her son. 

“Izuku Midoriya”

| | | | | | |  

Midoriya was seen picking at his food as he stared down at his plate and looked back up to see his mother happily chatting with the guest at the table, who he learned that her name is Y/n L/n upon bumping into her. 

And after repeatedly apologizing to her for 5 minutes straight for bumping into her.

“Izuku, this is the nice girl I told you about earlier, she bought the computer and phone I picked out for you.”

“R-really? Oh! Thank y-you!”, standing up, he bowed her head down as Y/n tried to stop him from doing that, not fully accustomed to it yet despise being and living in Japan for about 13 years.

“Wait, don’t do that! It wasn't a big deal anyways! Please don’t do that…. Oh! I also brought over some cookies for the two of you! Just as a thank you for inviting me over to have dinner!”, you say as you take the cookie tray out from who knows where and set it on the table.

“Oh L/n, you shouldn’t have…”

“It’s no problem Ms. Midoriya! Really!”

“Alright then, how about you two go play a game while I clean up, huh?”

“I can help you clean up!” Midoriya and yourself both look at each other and you're both standing from your seats as you said those words at the same time. If you were both being honest, neither one of you two were really ready to interact with each other yet. 

One reason being that one person doesn't know how to start the conversation off, and the other person does not know how to talk to a girl.

Inko just smiled and waved us off as she began to pick up the dishes at the table.

“It’s alright, you two go have fun! I insist!”

With that, she left to do the chore and left the two pre-teens alone in an awkward silence, not knowing who would break the ice first. Surprisingly, Midoriya was the first to break.

“W-we can hang out in m-my room…If you want t-to of course! I don’t want to make you uncomfortable and you're our guestsoyoushouldhavethesayinwhereweshouldhangoutandallthat-”

“Yeah sure, let's hang out in your room, I don’t mind.”

He looks at you and nods his head as he leads you towards his room. Once at the door, you see the classic All Might themed sign on his door with his name written on it. You weren’t going to lie, but you were mentally preparing your mental health and eyes for what's about to come next, you know he’s a big fan of All Might and if you were being honest, you were too. In other words, you're not a super fangirl that covers her room in All Might merch head-to-toe, sure you may have a few posters or an action figure here and there but not a whole entire shrine dedicated to the man!

Midoriya finally opens the door and you both walk in, and he closes the door behind him while a million thoughts go through his mind.

“There's a girl in my room, there's a girl in my room, there's a girl in my room, there's a gir-wait…...my room…...my room!”

As you take a side glance at Midoriya, you see the panic on his face, so you do the first thing that comes to your mind to calm him down from exploding.

“Oh my gosh, you like All Might too?”

Midoriya freezes for a second and looks at your smiling form with a small sparkle in your e/c eyes. 

"You like All Might?"

"Um, yea? Who doesn't? He's like a super cool hero you know?"

"U-um, yea! Totally! He's super cool, and his strength is unbelievable!"

From there on, both yourself and the green-haired boy talked about All Might for a good while, and you both started to talk about other heroes as well. One question led to another and the two of got to know each other more about each other.

| | | "-ok I'll be there in like 20 minutes, right, bye mom see ya in a bit!", ending the phone call, Midoriya stares at me. We both ended up siting on the floor with his Hero Analyses notes lying around as he showed me a few.

"I guess I gotta go, my parents want me back home before it gets to dark outside."

"O-oh! okay."

The two of you leave his room and see that his mom isn't anywhere to be seen, due to being called in at work and having to leave the two of you alone.

Once at the front door with your shoes on and everything, you open the door and step outside as Midoriya follows suite and leaves the door open. 

"Well, I guess I'll see you at school?" (Yes, you told him what school you were going to, and he was going to the same.)

"Yea! I'll see you then!"

Smiling, you start to walk about three meters away from him until he called out to you.

"L/n!"

Turning around, you look at him, "Yea, what's up?"

"I-I was wondering...."

Taking a deep breath, he says in a high and fast voice; "L/nDoyouwanttobemyfriend? It'stotallyokayifyousaynoIunderstandbecauseI'mquirklessandallbutIjustthought-"

"Sure."

Midoriya stopped talking and looked at the girl in confusion and surprised at the same time.

"W-wait, really?"

"Um, yea? Who wouldn't want to be friends with you! Besides, it doesn't matter to me that your quirkless, your still nice to hang out with. Oh, and you can call me Y/n."

"Then you can call me Izuku!"

Y/n smiled at him and walked closer to him until they were only a few feet apart now, his face all red and his heart pounding. 

"Alright Izuku, can I have your number? If we're going to be friends, I need a way to talk to you!"

| | | | | |

A/N:

Finally, ya'll got to meet Shinsou, Bakugo, and now Midoriya, who should I have you guys meet next? I'm kind of thinking about a certain villain. 😏

[heroheart]

Sending you good vibes for your exams!

thank you pal! trust me when i say am gonna need it

[fodenswhore]

Instagram Imagines PT 2

{ just more instagram imagines showcasing the life of y/n stilinski!}

~ i do not own any of these images, they were all found on pinterest, credit to original owners ~

part 1

masterlist

y/n.stilinski

liked by scottymccall, itslydiamartin, malialovesdeer and others

y/n.stilinski another day, another slay

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stilesstilinski i told you not to post this.

↳ y/n.stilinski oops?

↳ stilesstilinski 🙄🙄

itslydiamartin send me this rn

↳ stilesstilinski y/n do NOT send this to lydia

↳ y/n.stilinski ahhh

↳ y/n.stilinski well you see…

↳ y/n.stilinski it’s sorta too late stiles💔

kira.yukimura ur account is basically a stiles fan page at this point

↳ y/n.stilinski and what abt it💅🏼

y/n.stilinski

liked by stilesstilinski, scottymccall, invisiblecorey and others

y/n.stilinski first day of school vibes

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liamdunbar y/n.

↳ y/n.stilinski oops?

↳ liamdunbar i hate u

↳ y/n.stilinski it was too cute not to post ok🙄

scottymccall i swear all you do is expose people

↳ y/n.stilinski somebody’s gotta do it😎

stilesstilinski finally, a post that isn’t about me

y/n.stilinski

liked by malialovesdeer, itslydiamartin, scottymccall and others

tagged: @itslydiamartin @malialovesdeer @kira.yukimura

y/n.stilinski ma girls <3

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itslydiamartin I LOVE U

↳ y/n.stilinski I LOVE U MORE

↳ liamdunbar @y/n.stilinski i thought you loved me?

↳ y/n.stilinski i tolerate u

↳ liamdunbar ouch

kira.yukimura AHHHHH MY FAV PHOTO EVER

malialovesdeer who is lying on the floor

↳ y/n.stilinski pretty sure it’s you mal😂

y/n.stilinski

liked by itslydiamartin, invisiblecorey, scottymccall and others

tagged: @liamdunbar

y/n.stilinski the sky is pretty but liam is prettier😋

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stilesstilinski just opened instagram. this is not what i wanted to see.

↳ y/n.stilinski why don’t u just go ahead and delete ur account

↳ stilesstilinski don’t tempt me

notmasonhewitt how many tries did it take to get this photo right?

↳ liamdunbar too many

↳ y/n.stilinski i reckon the outcome was worth it tho

kira.yukimura the cutest couple!

y/n.stilinski

liked by liamdunbar, malialovesdeer, itslydiamartin and others

y/n.stilinski tbh

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itslydiamartin mood

stilesstilinski did you have grass stains all over your jeans after this?

↳ y/n.stilinski surprisingly not

liamdunbar photo creds?

↳ y/n.stilinski ah yes, thank u li ;)))

invisiblecorey is this a normal post for y/n?

↳ y/n.stilinkski don’t expect it to last🙄

y/n.stilinski

liked by invisiblecorey, scottymccall, kira.yukimura and others

tagged: @notmasonhewitt @invisiblecorey @liamdunbar

y/n.stilinski chaotic

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scottymccall typical liam, always on his phone

↳ liamdunbar sorry mom

↳ stilesstilinski let him know scotty

↳ y/n.stilinski y’all are impossible

notmasonhewitt i wasn’t aware that this was taken

↳ y/n.stilinski clearly

↳ notmasonhewitt damn

malialovesdeer i don’t like the way corey is looking at me.

↳ kira.yukimura it’s rather threatening isn’t it?

y/n.stilinski

liked by liamdunbar, kira.yukimura, scottymccall and others

y/n.stilinski reckons he’s taylor swift

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stilesstilinski can i request a song?

↳ y/n.stilinski no

↳ stilesstilinski why not?

↳ y/n.stilinski your music taste sucks

↳ stilesstilinski it does not!

↳ y/n.stilinski yes it does

liamdunbar where’s my grammy award?

↳ notmasonhewitt in ur dreams

y/n.stilinski

liked by notmasonhewitt, itslydiamartin, scottymccall and others

y/n.stilinski picasso i like it

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itslydiamartin what can’t you do at this point?

↳ stilesstilinski tidy her room

↳ y/n.stilinski don’t expose me like that🙄

↳ stilesstilinski it’s payback for all the times you’ve exposed me

notmasonhewitt you’re so talented!!

↳ y/n.stilinski ily bae

y/n.stilinski

liked by invisiblecorey, scottymccall, malialovesdeer and others

tagged: @liamdunbar @notmasonhewitt @invisiblecorey

y/n.stilinski drive-in movies >>>>>>

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brett_talbot would’ve been better if i was there

↳ y/n.stilinski me when i lie:

↳ notmasonhewitt humble yourself

stilesstilinski is that my radio?!

↳ y/n.stilinski no…

invisiblecorey liam falling asleep and snoring made the night 10x funnier

↳ y/n.stilinski it truly did

↳ liamdunbar i do not snore

↳ y/n.stilinski oh honey you do

[chaeiimimi]

08 𝖍𝖊𝖑𝖑𝖔 𝖇𝖆𝖇𝖞

Warning: very mild suggestiveness

Summary: you weren’t really sure how it happened, but an average student who wore glasses and spent all her extra time on bookstores and library managed to date your school’s volleyball club setter. On your 3rd year of law school, your ten years anniversary to be exact, he went home from Argentina and it was a week before he was going back, he broke up with you with the reason of he can’t handle long-distance relationship anymore despite being at it for two years. You didn’t cry, you stood there as he was sobbing in front of you, you held his face in your palms and offered him a gentle smile, gentle enough to let him know you’ll support him and will always be watching him, together with the child in your stomach right now, but he doesn’t need to know that.

chapters: prev//next

You woke up the next day feeling a hundred times better than yesterday

Strangely enough, you were on your bed, no Oikawa in sight, you proceeded to go out of your room to tidy up the whole house, well sike, the house is spotless, you clearly remembered sleeping with the playmat spread out and toys and books scattered, not to mention dozing off in the couch as Oikawa cuddles you

You felt your face suddenly heat up because of the sudden memory

You shook your head mumbling a “he was just sleepy” over and over again

“who’s sleepy? ” your suddenly whipped your head towards the door and saw a freshly showered Oikawa with simple ripped jeans and a hoodie

“how did you-“

“Oh, I took your keys” “I also brought us breakfast” he adds and proceeds to raise his left hand holding two orders of coffee and his right hand with two containers of food

“where did you come from?” you asked

To be honest, you didn’t expect him to come to your house now since you only asked him to take care of the kids yesterday

“Oh I just went home and took a quick shower then went to order us some food” he says in his usual cheery voice

You just nodded at him kind of feeling awkward, your breathe stinks, you had  dried up drool on your face, puffy eyes and bird nest hair

“you should eat first before feeding the twins, it’s quite early they’re gonna wake up a bit later” he says and ushers you to the kitchen

You didn’t know what the hell was going on, you just woke up, your head was still hazy, and out of nowhere your ex suddenly appears and gets you breakfast?

Well you still followed him nonetheless

You sat at the dining table as he lays out the food for the both of you

“so, what are your plans today?” he says taking a bite of his pancake

You sipped your coffee and answered “I’ll take the kids to ma’s and go to work”

“why are you taking the kids to your mother?”

“ma likes taking care of them, and I don’t have a babysitter”

“why are you taking the kids to your parent’s house when they have their dad to take care of them right here?”

“don’t you have better things to do?”

“awww is y/n-chan worried about me~”

“nevermind-“

“you don’t have to worry about that, I cleared my schedule for two weeks”

“why?”

“oh is it not enough? Don’t worry bubs I’ll clear my whole month for you-“

“Oikawa”

“what do you mean why? To focus on my family of course”

“why?”

“I just answered your question-“

“Why are you doing this when you’re gonna leave us after two months anyways?”

“Oh I’m leaving alright, but I’m taking you with me, or I can just finish up my season there then I can move back here in Japan, either way is fine”

“Oikawa we already talked about this-“

“and I changed my mind, do you really think I would leave my kids alone? You think so poorly of me Y/n chan, you hurt my heart”

He clenches his shirt on the left side of his chest as if his heart was aching, you rolled your eyes at his antics

“but Oikawa your career-“

“Y/n-chan~ do you really have so little faith in me?  I can build my career anywhere”

“but it’s your dream to play for the Argentina National Team, you had that dream since you were young!”

“well I have a different and bigger dream now, besides the person I like is in Japan right now”

There was a long silence between the two of you, you coughed, trying to mask the bitterness in your voice

“well, she must be very beautiful for you to change your dream”

He looked at you and smiled softly "yes, yes she is"

 “hey baby” you greeted Haruto who was babbling

You finished your breakfast and conversation thirty minutes ago

You picked him up and peppered Haruto’s face with kisses, you whipped your head to the door and saw Oikawa who was looking at you rather fondly with his phone recording

A blush crept to your neck as you furrowed your eyebrows at him

He immediately notices and chuckles, putting his phone away, and approaches you

“hey bud” he says and plants a kiss on Haruto’s forehead

“bah!” Haruto giggles flapping his arms up and down making you laugh as well

“alright, time to get you fed buddy” you say and sat down on your feeding chair

You lift your shirt up ready to feed Haruto when

“damn” Oikawa says underneath his breath but you heard it loud and clear

Your eyes widen as you immediately yanked your shirt down

“Oikawa!” you called him angrily

“what?” he says trying hard to suppress the grin threatening to crack on his face

“get out I’m feeding the kids” he couldn’t point out if the redness of your face was because of anger or embarrassment

“oh are you shy bubs? It’s not like I didn’t suck on those-“

“Oikawa get out”

He lets out a chuckle and turns around to exit but not before pausing and turns his head to look at you saying “I guess I’ll just wait until it’s my turn Y/n chan~”

You knew damn well your face was red because of embarrassment

You looked down at your “Haru what am I supposed to do about your father?”

“bah?”

Ok so this chapter is very short, hehe I was suffering from severe writer's block and my brain was just not cooperating. Anyways, I hope y'all liked this chapter! Comments and Reblogs are very appreciated and comment, ask, or dm me if you want a tag on the future chapters as well

I can't believe we're more than half way through the story and you guys still like it, my heart-😭💖

Taglist:

VDHSHSHB am so sorry I can't tag some accounts I'll just highlight those accounts 😭

@heiressofdexter @artsamber @seashellmichellee @meri-soni-meri-tamanna @misssugarless @minnieminnie00-got7  @karakento @tsukkisfatsimp  @torus-wiife @fiaesco @stormcastello @tintina365

[madpanda75]

“Taking Chances Part 10: The Perfect Gift”

Part 10 is here! Not gonna lie, this chapter is short and not my best work but a necessary bridge to get to the climax of our story! Fair warning, it ends on a cliffhanger. Enjoy! ❤️ 

It was the Tuesday after the dramatic Carisi lunch. You typically had Mondays off from the gallery and after fucking Rafael senseless in front of the fireplace, it didn’t take much convincing on your part to get him to play hooky. The majority of your day was spent in bed— making love, browsing through Netflix, and eating Chinese takeout. It was a much needed escape from your chaotic lives and you still had a few more hours before reality set in. 

The brilliant warm rays of the early morning sun peeked through your curtains. You languorously stretched your limbs, reveling in the sensation of your bare legs against the soft cotton sheets. With a long, drawn out yawn, you reached over to the nightstand for your cup of coffee and aimlessly flipped through a copy of the New Yorker. However your attention was otherwise preoccupied with a freshly showered Rafael walking around your bedroom with a towel hanging low around his hips. You nearly spilled your hot drink into your lap while counting the water droplets on Rafael’s bare chest, watching one droplet slide down his stomach towards his happy trail.

He let the towel drop to the floor and began to get dressed for work, arching his brow when he caught you perched on the edge of the bed staring at him with your jaw hanging wide open. 

You blushed and cleared your throat. “Are you sure I can’t make you breakfast?”

“Thanks for the offer but I should try to get to the office early,” he said, holding up two ties for you to choose from.

You picked the silk violet tie. The purple hue brought out your boyfriend’s brilliant green eyes. “Ok, but promise me that you’ll eat something other than the stale pretzels at the precinct.”

“I promise.” Rafael gave you a quick peck on the lips and wrapped his tie around his neck when he realized that he was missing a key element to his wardrobe. “Where’s my shirt? I swore it was right here a min—” His search for the missing shirt came to a screeching halt when he noticed you were wearing it.

“Sorry babe.” A nervous giggle escaped your lips. “Who knew Armani made such comfortable clothes and besides I love how it smells.”

Rafael furrowed his eyebrows in confusion. “How it smells?”

“Uh huh.” Your cheeks turned bright pink and you nervously fidgeted with the hem of his shirt. “It smells like you.”

An warm, fuzzy feeling coursed through Rafael’s veins at your confession. He cupped your face and tenderly kissed you before pulling away. “If you love the shirt so much, then it’s yours.”

“Really?” You glanced down at his undershirt and the tie draped around his neck. “But what are you gonna wear?”

“I have a spare shirt in my office that I keep in case of emergency coffee stains.”

You beamed brightly and wrapped your arms around his neck. “Best boyfriend ever,” you murmured against his lips before kissing him.

He deepened the kiss, parting your lips with his tongue as his hands inched further down your back towards your ass. You moaned in response, feeling him squeeze your cheeks.

“Mi amor,” he said between kisses. “I have to go.”

 “No. Five more minutes. Please,” you whined, pressing your body against his.

Rafael groaned, all the blood from his brain rushing towards his cock. You were playing a dangerous game. “If we keep this up in five more minutes I’m going to be between your legs, fucking you so hard that you’ll forget your own name.”

You nuzzled against his neck as your hand began to palm his growing erection. “Well they do say that testosterone is higher in the morning. Care to put that theory to the test?” 

“Y/N,” he said in a warning tone.

With a sigh of defeat, you stopped. “Alright, can’t blame a girl for trying.” You planted one last chaste kiss on the tip of his nose and gently pushed him towards the door. “Go on. Get outta here.”

 “I’ll see you later tonight.” He grabbed his jacket and left the bedroom only to return 30 seconds later. “I forgot something.”

“What did you—” Rafael cut you off with a passionate kiss causing you both to fall back on the bed.  Your heart fluttered. You were so lost in the moment that you forgot how to breathe. You could taste him on your tongue. All too soon the kiss ended and you were left dazed with thoroughly soaked panties.

“I love you,” he purred and playfully nipped on your lower lip before leaving with a smug smile firmly planted on his face.

“Love you too,” you mumbled and held up the shirt to your nose, inhaling deeply. 

*****

A few hours later you were sitting in the small studio at the back of the gallery, dotting leaves onto a canvas. You skipped to the next song on your playlist and stepped back to analyze your work. The painting was of a large, vibrant tree in the center of a grey, bleak city. The tree was designed to look like Rafael. Its leaves matched the color of his eyes. Of course it wasn’t typical for trees to have seafoam green leaves but that was the beauty of art. You even tried to sketch his face in the trunk, its bark resembling his crooked smile and strong aquiline nose. 

Underneath the tree stood the shadowy figure of a woman meant to be you. The tree’s branches were outstretched, gently caressing you, comforting you. In the palms of your hands, you cradled your heart, offering it to the tree as the only possession you had to give. In your opinion, it was the perfect depiction of your relationship. Rafael was your protector. With him, you felt loved, safe, hopeful for the future. He symbolized a new chapter in your life.

Your “Rafael-inspired” piece was meant to be a surprise, since the elusive search for the perfect art for his home was still ongoing. Lucky for him, inspiration struck one rainy Saturday several weeks ago. Well, lazy for you. Rafael was busy typing away on his laptop. Snuggling against him with the rain pattering against the window, a flood of emotions washed over you. The next day you woke up before dawn, grabbed your brushes and paint and snuck over to the studio.

From above the sound of your music playing through your headphones, you heard the door open and turned your head to see your coworker, Phoebe, walk in.

“Bonjour, ma petite aubergine!” she said in a tone that was way too chipper for 8:30 in the morning. 

You snorted a laugh and turned off your music. “Good morning, my little eggplant?” you repeated the phrase.

“I love eggplant,” she replied with a shrug and went to stand behind you, surveying your work. “Hmmm… I like it.”

You made a face. “You sure? It’s not too cheesy?”

She hemmed and hawed for a moment before answering. “A little, but that’s ok. It's the good kind of cheesy.”

A sigh below past your lips. “You sure?”

“Absolutely,” she tried to reassure you. “And anyways, love makes people cheesy.” You blushed and went back to your painting while she milled around the room looking at your other pieces. “Ya’ know, there’s a new artist night at this gallery my friend works for. You should reach out to them. See if they’ll let you show your art. There are enough pieces here to choose from.” You opened your mouth to speak but she cut you off. “And before you say anything, I don’t wanna hear any excuses.” She gently took you by the shoulders and made you stand to face her. “You are incredibly talented and you should share that talent with the world while making a few bucks in the process.”

“Maybe you’re right,” you conceded, glancing back at your unfinished canvas.

Phoebe’s eyes widened. “I am? I mean, of course I am! Damn, this is the first time I’ve ever heard you consider doing a show. That Rafael guy must be a good influence on you.”

“Yeah, he’s the best.” You smiled, thinking back to earlier that morning. 

“Speaking of which,”—she grabbed a spare chair and sat down, getting comfortable—“how did the whole ‘meet the parents’ scenario play out?”

You threw your head back and groaned. “Ugh, why did you have to remind me?”

“Uh-oh. Sounds like we’re gonna need coffee.” She stood up and grabbed her purse. “I’m gonna get a cappuccino from the cafe around the corner. Can I get you something?”

“An Americano and a cinnamon roll.”

“Be back in a flash. I wanna hear all about it. Family drama sustains me, especially when it’s not mine,” she teased before leaving.

You rolled your eyes and began to tidy up. While you stood at the sink, cleaning your brushes, watching the colors swirl and dissolve down the drain, you wondered if Rafael would like his surprise. You hoped he would. It took you hours to get just the right shade of green. 

This gift was a big deal. Apart from your parents, you had never created a piece for anyone else. Your art was private. It was personal. Giving it away was like giving away a part of you. But you and Rafael were beyond that. This past weekend only confirmed what you had known from the moment he stepped into the gallery— that you were his, completely.

The sound of the door opening snapped you out of reverie. “That was fast, Phoebe,” you said over the running water. “I guess the cute barista wasn’t working today cause normally you spend a solid twenty minutes flirting before actually ordering your drink. I’m almost finished here. Give me a sec and then I can tell you about the worst Sunday lunch in the history of the Carisi family and that includes the time my Aunt Anita stabbed my Uncle Tony with a fork. ”

“Awww c’mon, babe. It wasn’t that bad,” said a voice that you recognized all too well. 

Stunned, your hands froze, the brushes clanging against the sink. “This can’t be happening. Please, God don’t let it be him,” you thought, slowly turning around only to find your ex-fiancé standing right in the middle of your studio. 

“Theo,” you stammered. “What are you doing here?”

He ignored your question and took a step towards you with a sinister smile that made the hairs on the back of your neck stand up. 

Tag List: @glimmerglittergirl​ @southern-magnolia​ @sweetcannolicarisi​ @delia26​ @obfuscateyummy​ @sass-and-suspenders​ @eclecticminded​ @thatesqcrush​ @katmstanton​ @amirightcounsellor @beltzboys2015-blog​ @letty-o​ @sonnysdoll​ @lyssa1385​ @sweetsummertime99​ @burningsorr0ws​ @gibbs274​ @izzythefanfreak​ @babypink224221​ @livxrafa​ @esparza-army​ @obsessionprofessional​ @ottosuricato​ @mgarner1227​ @dreila03​ @frenchiefoxy @tropes-and-tales​ @thecraziestcrayon​ @goodluckfindingone​ @scarletsoldierrr​ @youreverycolor​ @yeah-boiiiiiiiiiii​ @imagine-all-the-imagines​ @imjustreallynosy​ @graniairish​ @ashley-chi​ @lolacolaempath @cocomel0613​ @mysterioustrashadventures​ @that-girl-named-alex​ @scapricciatello​ @mrsrafaelbarba​ @zizzlekwum​ @katierpblogg​ @crowleysqueenofhell​ @caked-crusader​ @garturbo​ @rachelxwayne​

[sunshineseung]

Sinner Part 2 // Felix

💌 Info: Stray Kids Felix x female!reader smut 💕 Includes: dom!reader x sub!felix, themes of religion, teasing, exhibitionism/fear of being caught, first time, loss of innocence, establishment of safeword, degradation and praise, oral/fingering (receiving), unprotected sex, riding, cum play, slight aftercare ✏️ Word Count: ~4.2k

Please read part one of this series first :) Thank you!

The rain was pouring in the pitch black outside, but the lights inside the church hall were bright as day. The only occupant of the church on this night was Lee Felix deep in prayer, oblivious to the storm outside. With hands folded and head bowed, he whispered his prayer through his lips, a slight echo of his words spreading through the otherwise empty room. 

Felix jolts up at the sound of the main entrance being opened and slammed shut quickly after. A feminine sigh can be heard, and Felix lets out a shy “hello” to the intruder of his private repentance time. 

“Oh, you’re here?” You say while entering the main hall, throwing your wet jacket over one of the pews. “I thought this place would have been empty.”

“What are you doing here?” Felix retorts immediately, slightly offended that of all people to walk in at this moment, it had to be you. 

“I should be asking you the same thing, little boy.” You shuffle the hair on his head, earning an annoyed grunt from him. “The bitch ass pastor’s making me clean the archives in the basement since I... caused some trouble earlier this week.”

“Caused some trouble? Is that all you have to say for yourself?” Felix was beyond offended at this point. If it wasn’t your name-calling of the pastor, it was your dismissal of your actions. “You and your group of friends painted sinful phrases on the side of the church!”

“It was all in good fun, damn. Chill out.” While, yes, spray painting God Loves Lesbians on the wall of the church was questionable, it was fun! And best of all, the pastor said he wouldn’t call authorities if you cleaned the basement. “It was worth it anyway. Did you see the look on his face? Priceless!” 

The boy was boiling with rage, but he held his anger back in fear of cursing or saying the Lord’s name in vain. Despite hating you, part of him wanted to save you. While not being the healthiest mindset, Felix felt like he could save anyone from sin, and he was going to try to save what he called the rodent of the congregation. 

“Now, if you don’t mind me asking, why are you here?” Your tone of voice edged on sarcasm, you having full knowledge of his nightly prayer. He had calmed down, remembering that he was in a place of the Lord. His face returned from red back to it’s normal hue, and he looked to you with gentle eyes.

“I was praying. I did some questionable things this week too.” His admission to sin took you aback. You didn’t expect everyone’s favorite boy to openly confide in you that he committed an act against his God, something you never thought he would do.

“What kind of questionable things?” Your interest was piqued, and his sudden bluntness was just what you wanted to see. What resides in the mind of Felix?

“I shouldn’t be telling you this.” He looks into his lap, a sudden wave of shyness clouding him. You sit next to him on the pew, patting his back to comfort him. Despite him being so critical of your actions, you did have a soft spot for the sweet boy. “I... pleasured myself.”

You almost burst out into laughter, but you had to suppress that for now, because the most holy person you knew just said he masturbated, and he felt bad about it. As someone who was not shy to doing that specific act among other ungodly things, to see someone repent for doing something totally natural in your eyes was otherworldly. 

“It’s okay, Felix. Sex is natural.” You attempted to comfort him, but you could tell by the deepness in his eyes that he still regretted what he did. Also, when you so casually said the word sex, he winced a bit since he hated the word so much. “You have nothing to be ashamed for. Everyone masturbates.” 

“You don’t understand!” The raise in his voice boomed through the desolate church hall, and you darted your look towards him in shock. “It wasn’t just that.” His voice got soft again, almost a whisper. You lean in to hear him. “I watched the most sinful videos. I thought about myself doing those horrid things. I feel filthy.”

“Lix, I understand completely. Do you think I haven’t done those exact name things?” You raise your eyebrow at him, and he timidly shakes his head. “You’re a young adult. This is normal. Don’t let it eat you up, okay?” 

“Okay.” His deep voice sent shivers down your spine, and it just hit you that you were basically giving him the birds and the bees talk. A comforting smile graces your face as you get up from your seat next to Felix. 

“I should go start cleaning the basement. Mind helping me?” You hold your hand out to him, offering some more time to spend with you. He reluctantly takes your hand, and you help him stand from the pew. You two silently make your way into the damp basement of your church. 

Dust, cobwebs, and the sent of mold cover the dreary basement as you and Felix step down. The conversation in the basement is much more lighthearted, but you can’t shake the image of Felix masturbating out of your head. You’ve never thought of the star child like that before, but his confession made you see him in a new light. He wasn’t above you. He was a teenager driven by sex and hormones like everyone else. 

Once the basement was tidy, books arranged on shelves and dust swept away, you exchanged phone numbers with the boy and headed on your merry way, but that was far from the last time you would hear from Felix.

Over the next two weeks, Felix would text you casually. It started as a nice, wholesome friendship: discussing classes, complaining about personal things, and sharing homework. No matter what the conversation topic was, your mind would wander to the more dark and depraved side of your persona. You wanted to pick his brain on a multitude of topics, but most of all: sex. Since confessing his scandal to you, you wanted to know if he did it again, what he’s into, or even if he’s thought about you.

One night, in a heightened state of mind, you text him a simple question: Have you jerked off since that night? Sure, you regretted it when you sobered up, but you got the answer you wanted... sort of.

I’ve wanted to, but I also want to get into heaven unlike some people. Wow, pointed. However, I have watched more... pornographic films??? Sometimes the girl puts the mans... in her mouth, and it’s scary. Why would someone want to do that?

After explaining to the poor boy what a blowjob is and why it’s amazing, he takes two days to respond to your text, something he’s never done before. It was radio silence, and you didn’t bother to try to garner a response, because you knew Felix was busy

After waiting what seemed like an eternity for a response, you got what you were praying for, and you were worried this would happen.

I’m sorry if this comes off as aggressive, but will you show me a blowjob? Like, perform a blowjob on me? I take back what I said about getting into heaven. I can always beg for forgiveness, but right now, I’m really frustrated. 

You’ve created a monster. 

When Felix escapes the attic after you give him what you believe to be his first sexual encounter with another person, you quietly reenter the congregation as if you didn’t just cause the prettiest church boy to bust a load on himself minutes before. 

“Darling, there you are!” Your mother holds her arms out to you after what you presumed to be a particularly moving speech from the pastor. “We’re having dinner with the Lee family tonight, and I’d expect you to be on your best behavior. Would you like to join us?” 

“I’d be happy to go, mom.” Fuck fuck fuck. This was supposed to be a one time thing, and as much as the idea of teasing Felix in front of his family excited you, you’d hate to get caught by your own family, although the devil in you was very willing to take that risk for the slightest bit of sexual satisfaction. 

“Great! We’ll head over at 5 o’clock. Please dress up, dear. Your current shirt looks wrinkled. What were y-” 

“I’ll dress up, don’t worry!” You cut her off, and her face scrunches, but you’d rather not have to deal with the wrath of your mother. Your father returns to your mother after having a short conversation with Felix’s father.

“Mr. Lee said Felix could be a good influence on you, Y/n.” The temptation to roll your eyes was strong considering the preceding events. “Pay attention to how he talks to his parents. You could learn something, sweetheart.”

As much as you wanted to cause a scene in the church from your father’s condescending tone, you were more focused on getting home and changing your soaked, ruined panties. Your family says their casual goodbyes to the other churchgoers, and you make your way back to the family car, hoping your father speeds home. 

“Honey, it’s time to go!” Your mother puts in her second earring as she yells up to your room from the bottom of the stairs. Your door wings open to reveal you in a short red skirt, low-cut white shirt, white dress shoes, and bright red lipstick. “You’re wearing that?”

“It’s fine, ma! Nothing they haven’t seen before!” You whisk past your mother and slide into the backseat of the family car, ready to have dinner with the boy of your nightmares. 

When you enter the Lee family household, you can tell Felix’s parents are judging you, but you didn’t dress like that for them. When Felix turns the corner and faces you, his eye practically bulge out of his head. His gaze is glued to your thighs, hips, bust, and lips, and you wouldn’t have it any other way. Judging by the sudden tightening in his pants, he clearly enjoys the view.

“Hello! Welcome to our house,” Felix’s mother escorts you inside to the living room. “Make yourself at home until dinner is ready.” She disappears into the kitchen while Felix’s father sits down on the couch and invites you and your family to sit with him. Felix shyly sits next to his father, although there was hardly any room for him to sit there. 

Your father and Felix’s father start talking about sports, while your mother goes on her phone. You make eye contact with Felix from across the couch, and his whole body tenses and he breaks into a nervous sweat. Aw, she’s so pretty, what do I do, what do I do, frick, frick, fuck.

Without saying a word, Felix gets up and runs out of the living room. Everyone darts their attention towards him, but no one tries to stop him. 

“Dinner’s re- where did Felix go?” His mother enters the living room, but her announcement is halted by the absence of her son. Everyone looks at each other, no one having answers for Felix's tantrum. "Would someone go get him please?"

"I got him." Your devious smirk should set the crowd off, but you make your way up the stairs to where you see Felix's bedroom door. His door had his name on it, so it was pretty clear what room was his.

"Go away." The second he hears your knock, he throws a pillow at his door, as if that would stop you from barging in. You see him sat on his bed, arms crossed, another pillow over his crotch, and his lip in a pout. "Why did you come here wearing that?"

He was definitely on the defense, and you've never seen Felix this angry since the night in the church. "I just thought this outfit was cute." Playing innocent might not have been the best idea at this moment, but you just had to calm him down and get him out to dinner.

"Yeah, it's a nice outfit, but I can see your butt whenever you turn around, and your cleavage is out, and I'm just very confused." He was frustrated at himself more than you. You sit next to him and put your hand on his shoulder, a familiar scene.

"Come down for dinner, and afterwards, I'll show you what I have under this outfit, okay babe?" Felix was so painfully tensed, every nerve of his was on edge. Your words were filthy, but he loved it so much.

He can't stop thinking about you. He wants to do everything to your body: eat you out, fuck your tits, spank your ass. He wants to do every sinful thing he's seen in those videos. Just imagining seeing you in your underwear makes him want to bust in his pants. You're driving him insane, and if Felix from a few weeks ago had seen what he has become, he would be disgusted.

You two make your way downstairs, Felix staring at your ass the entire time, and take your seats at the table. The dinner table was a circle, so you were seated right between Felix and your mother. Not the sexiest setting, but that wouldn't stop you.

The food was delicious, but halfway through, you placed your hand on Felix's thigh, and although you had him pecking the back of your throat earlier that day, he was still extremely sensitive to every touch. When your hand slid up his leg, he let out the quietest moan, and although the table was full of chatter between your parents, you were able to hear the precious sounds leaving Lee Felix as you swiped your hand across his twitching bulge.

Felix grabs your wrist and throws your arm back to you. He gives you a death stare, but his eyes are dark, and he looks so fucking needy. You meet his gaze and adjust your top, pulling it even lower than it already was. His eyes are glued to your tits, but you point down to your crotch, where you're fingering your self under the table. Felix bites his lip, but goes back to eating his food.

You take your wet finger and wipe it against his pant leg. Jesus fucking Christ, you were breaking this boy. His bulge was painfully large, and again, he felt like he could bust in his pants.

"I'm wet for you, baby boy. When dinner's over, do you want to taste me?" You whisper in his ear, and he closes his eyes tightly, trying not to fully fall for your tricks. His pathetic nod is all you need to go back to finishing your dinner, and he does the same, but his mind is fogged with the image of your naked body bouncing on his cock. So pathetic. So, so pathetic.

Dinner ends, Felix's mom takes the plates, and you and Felix disappear back into his room while the adults have their alone time to drink and chat. When he locks the door, you pin him to the wall and lick your lips. You stare him up and down, watching him as he panics. Everything he wanted to do to you escapes him, and he's putty in your hands.

Speechless, Felix rests his hands flush against the wall and tilts his head backwards, giving you full access to his neck. You take the opportunity to make dark hickeys along his neck, which will definitely be visible to his parents later. Your tongue against his skin makes him shudder, and mindless whimpers escape his lips.

"If you ever want to stop, the safe word is red, or snap twice. I'll only go as far as you want to, Lix." He nods, repeats what you said, and you go back to work on his neck.

"C-can I taste you?" His words are feint, but you're more than happy to take his request. You slip your skirt down to the floor and take off your tight shirt, giving Felix a full show of your lingerie you wore just for him.

"You've become such a whore for me, Lix." You traced his body with your hands, sliding your fingertips over his abs and chest. "Do you even know what to do with my pussy, huh? You're so innocent, I doubt you'd be able to make me cum."

His heart was racing, and he wanted nothing more than to prove you wrong. While, yes, he had no idea what he was doing, he wanted to taste your sweet release coat his tongue.

"Teach me." He was being bold. You'd never thought you'd see Felix this confident in this setting, especially since he was admitting to being inexperienced. You took his hands in yours and lead him to the bed. He watched you as you sat on the edge of the bed and spread your legs, giving him full access to your dripping cunt.

"Get on your knees, baby boy." He did as instructed, but this was the first time he was on his knees next to his bed to do anything other than pray. His hands ghosted over your thighs, scared to touch you without your permission.

"May I take off your panties?" You nod and lift your hips, allowing him to slide them down your legs. A string of wetness connected you with your panties, and Felix's mouth was watering. Your panties were discarded across the room, and you unhooked your bra and tossed it with the rest of your clothes. "Woah, you're so gorgeous."

You pet his blushing, freckled cheek, and coax him closer to your heat. His lips are hardly centimeters away from you, and you gently tangle your hand in his hair. "Lick my pussy, naughty boy. I know you want to."

Felix bites his lip before diving into your pussy, his tongue exploring every fold. Even though he doesn't know where the clitoris is, he knows that when he licks the top of your pussy, your thighs shake around him, so he circles his tongue through your cunt, and you give him the sweetest praise.

"Such a good boy for me, yeah?" You smile down at him, and the eye contact is intoxicating. You tighten around nothing when his tongue perfectly flicks over your clit. "Finger me, please, baby.”

He inserts his index finger into your core, and it feels like heaven to both of you. Felix imagines it's his cock inside you, and the thought of you tightening around him urges him to take his tight pants off without removing his mouth from your pussy.

"Bend your finger, my slutty little boy. Make your mistress cum on your pretty face." Your high was approaching, and you wanted Felix to work for it. He fucked his finger into you, adding his middle finger in the process. The more he looked at your heat, the more nervous he got, but from the wetness covering his fingers and lips, you didn't notice how nervous he was.

His fingers perfectly pushed into your g-spot, and your orgasm got miles closer. Your moans got louder, and no matter how close your parents were to hearing, you didn't quiet down. Felix loved your moans, and his cock twitches in his underwear.

"You're so hot, Y/n, please cum for me." His voice was hoarse and desperate, but you weren't that easy.

"Suck my clit. Make me cum all over your face, cutie." He aimlessly sucked at your folds, but when he found your clit, he never left that spot. Your violent moans of pleasure made him groan onto your clit, sending you over the edge. Your essence covered his fingers, and he lapped up every bit of your release. "Good boy."

You were out of breath, but Felix just started. He stood up and sat in your lap. You placed your hands on his hips, squeezing him and making him jolt. His erection was painfully pressed against his tight boxers, and you hooked your finger around the waistband and pulled them down his thighs. Although it had only been a few hours, his length never failed to impress you.

"Please fuck me, Y/n. I want to feel you on me." He was so desperate for any sort of touch. You lazily wrapped your hand around his cock and started stroking, but he grabbed your wrist, stopping you. "Ride me."

"Very demanding for a little slut, don't you think?" You throw him off your lap, his back harshly slamming onto the bed. Your legs surround his hips as you line your entrance with his cock, and he squeezes his eyes shut. His hands held onto your thighs as if it were life or death, and for him, it was.

Right before you lowered yourself onto him, he felt every negative thought enter his mind. What if I'm not good enough? What if I cum too soon? What if she hates me? What would my parents say if they caught us? God, please forgive me.

You see him grit his teeth, and you stop. You gently pet his cheek again, bringing him back to earth, and more importantly, bringing his attention back on your dripping core hanging over his cock.

Without warning, Felix grabs your hips and pushes you down onto him. He loses all control, and you love it. You stay still once he bottoms out, his face contorting into questionable expressions from the pleasure overwhelming him. He calms down, and you start to ride him, his cock sliding against your walls and filling you up perfectly.

You throw your head back and quicken your pace, chasing your second orgasm. Felix feels himself on the edge, but he holds back, fearful of what will happen if he cums inside you.

"Fuck, Felix, you feel so good." Your moans are so load, and the creaking of the bed is deafening. Felix's deep grunts and growls sound amazing, and his grip on your hips is tight enough to bruise. "So good, baby boy, so good."

His finger lingers to the familiar spot that is your clitoris, although Felix doesn't know that fully. He circles his finger around your sensitive bud, and his other hand grips your tit. His hands feel so good, and with one more press into your g-spot, you coat his cock in your cum. He thrusts into you when you tighten around him, and his orgasm is threatening to release, but he refuses to be the father of a child with someone who he is not married to.

You ride out your high on his cock, and when you return back to earth, you remove yourself and harshly wrap your hand around his cock. Your pumps are violent, and his body is aching for an orgasm. You bend over and lick the tip, his cum coating your tongue and face. He opens his eyes, cum squirted onto your face, and he's sure you'll be mad at him, but you lick your lips, collect his cum from your face, and swallow every last drop.

Without a word, you topple over next to him, and you rest your head on his chest. He hesitantly wraps his arm around you, and you muzzle into him.

"You're so good for me, Felix." You whisper into him, but he hear every word. He smiles, unable to speak after the intense orgasm he just experienced. "We need to go back downstairs, you know?"

After a few moments of silence, Felix speaks up. "Y/n, this is... wrong." He sits up, your head falling onto the bed and his arms holding him up. "We shouldn't have done this."

"Did you enjoy it?"

"Yes, b-"

"Then nothing is wrong." You pat his back, admiring the defined muscles. You sit up with him and look at the clothes scattered across the room. "Sex isn't bad, Lix."

"This just goes against what I've been taught my entire life." He pauses, deep in thought. "Sex is good." He repeats under his breath.

You stand up and stretch, your ass catching Felix's eye. He sighs and accepts his actions, clearing his floor of the discarded clothing and getting dressed again.

"Felix, can I borrow a hoodie?" You hold up a hoodie from the local Christian radio station, and Felix shrugs. "Thanks, babe."

"Y/n, do you like me?" You stop in your tracks after Felix's question, and you honestly don't know how to answer. Did you like Lee Felix?

"I'm not sure, but maybe we could go on a date sometime." Your tone was casual, but your mind was racing. Before this, you thought you didn't have feelings for the cute little church boy, but now that you've been confronted with it, you didn't know how to feel.

"... Sure."

[musicnoots]

Another Cinderella Story

Babe Heffron/Reader

Prompt “Oh my God, I'm in love with an adult man-child” requested by anon

A/N: 🌼BABE CUTENESS🌼

Synopsis: The quest for a missing shoe at one in the morning.

Tags: @gottapenny @dustyjjumpwings @wexhappyxfew @medievalfangirl @bandofmarvels @those-dusty-jump-wings @curraheev @junojelli @majwinters​ @david-weepster @evelyn-shelby @those-dusty-jump-wings @floydtab @rayleighshughes @alienoresimagines @yeahcurrahee @not-john-watsons-blog @inglourious-imagines @meteora-fc​ 

“Psst, Y/N,” he whisper-yells. He’s trying his very best not to rudely wake you up, rather, politely wake you up in the middle of the night. “Y/N?”

Babe can’t find the pair of his shoes. His favorite pair of shoes. The ones his Ma gave him for his eighteenth birthday—the brown oxfords that he’d been laying his eyes on at the store weeks before all those years ago.

He’s all but turned the entire house upside down looking for them. 

The shoe rack is in disarray, your shared closet that was once neat and tidy is now messy and won’t close shut thanks to your boyfriend and his midnight antics. Babe had also gone rummaging through the kitchen cabinet, as if the missing shoe would magically appear in between the bread and jam. 

“Hello?” he shakes your shoulder this time, and that’s enough to wake you up from your deep sleep, dazed and confused as to who’s talking to you right now. “Hello? Earth to Y/N?”

“Babe?”

You yawn, your hand drifts to touch his cheek—truth be told, you hadn’t noticed that he’d slipped out of bed. 

You swear your person was in bed snuggling with you ten seconds ago! His head tucked under your armpit, his lips attached to the underside of your breast, and his hand resting on the curve of your waist all while hogging all the blankets from you (he doesn’t mean it, though), you hadn’t noticed until he wakes you up while on a scavenger hunt for God knows what at this hour.

“Baby, have you seen the other pair of my shoes?” He holds the shoe up. “My favorite ones. I’ve been lookin’ all ova’ the goddamn place for ‘em!”

You almost let it slide past you. Luckily, you’d recovered from your muddled state to snag a peak at the clock on the nightstand. It’s well past midnight. “W—“

“Looked in the closet, looked in the living room, I even looked in the damn cabinet! S’like it just grew legs of its own and walked straight out the door! What do I gotta do to find the missing pair?”

“Why are you looking for your shoe in the middle of the night?”

He sighs and sits on the edge of the bed. “I’m goin’ to Bill’s place! Now, Y/N, can you please help me find my goddamn shoe?”

You blink. Bill’s place? You know the two are the bestest of friends, but you’re not too sure if that includes Babe randomly waking up at half past one to hang out. “Why are you going to Bill’s? It’s one in the morning?”

“I want ‘im to make a grilled cheese for me,” he says, and your eyes nearly bulge out of your head.

Really? Grilled cheese? At one in the morning?

“You want to go to Bill’s house...because you want him to make you...a grilled cheese…”

Part of you knows not to question why your favorite gentle ginger woke up in the middle of the night suddenly wanting a grilled cheese sandwich—a few months ago, he woke you up at 4 in the morning asking for you to bake him a few cupcakes that he ended up helping decorate with vanilla frosting and rainbow sprinkles.

But Babe thinks, as if you didn’t already love him, that he shouldn’t bother you again at this ungodly hour.

“Yes! But my shoe, Y/N!” he whines. “I’ve been lookin’ everywhere for it! Looked in the closet, looked in the pantry, looked in the fridge—I swear if I lost it for good, I’m gonna be so fuckin’ sad. My Ma gave it to me for my birthday a couple years ago!” He sighs and buries his face into his hands. “Goddamnit, I just wanted a grilled cheese and now I’m pissed off because I can’t find the other pair of my favorite shoes!”

“Babe—”you sit up in bed and put a hand on his shoulder to get his attention, “if you wanted a grilled cheese this bad, then you could have made one yourself, we have the things to make it.”

“No…”

“No?”

He pouts. “It’s not as good as yours.”

Him saying that automatically warms up your heart. 

You love him, damnit. You didn’t say no then, so there’s no way you wouldn’t get up and make your wonderful boyfriend the greatest grilled cheese to have ever graced this Earth. “Alright,” you swing your legs over the edge of the bed and stand up, “let’s go make you that grilled cheese. C’mon, baby.”

His eyes light up in joy. “Really?” he says as you tug on his hand to follow. “But can we still look for my shoe? After I eat the grilled cheese, I mean. I’m gonna be so sad if I never find ‘em! My Ma would never forgive me!”

“Babe, you’re alright, and besides, I think Mango probably hid it somewhere to sit in it without having to deal with you trying to cuddle with her.”

He nods. Mango is a pretty smart cat, and judging from the countless times she’s stolen both of your shoes to sit in, it’s more than likely that she’s abducted Babe’s favorite shoe. “I can’t help it! Mango’s just so squishy, and she’s an awesome cuddle buddy whenever you’re not home to give me the lovin’ I deserve.”

“I’m starting to think you love Mango more than me.”

“No!” Babe wraps his arms around you from behind, his chin resting on her shoulder as the both of you waddle out of the bedroom and into the kitchen, ready to make that wretched grilled cheese he made all the ruckus about this morning. “I love you,” he peppers your neck with kisses, “from my butt to the top of my head. I love Mango, too, but she probably took my shoe so I’m kind of eh about her now. And I know you’re gonna love the way I decorated the kitchen...”

“Oh my God,” you sigh, coming to see how much of a mess he actually made. It’s nice to see that he tried to clean up for your sake, but the open cookie jar sitting on the counter is enough to make you realize how Babe has cemented his presence into your everyday life. “I’m in love with an adult man-child.”

He nuzzles his nose into the crook of your neck. “Yeah, but I’m your adult man-child.”

[tweedlydumbtweedlydoo]

Off Limits (Spencer Reid) #3

Well, here is chapter 3. It is a little longer than the previous two. enjoy!! 

Previous Chapters: 

Chapter 1

Chapter 2

Tag List: @on-my-way-to-erebor​ ​, @haileymorelikestupid​ , 

NOT MY GIF

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Soon after Spencer and Ava’s conversation had ended (well had been interrupted), the group were packing their things. They received a case from Seattle, WA and would be leaving on the jet in half an hour. They didn’t know how long they would be out there. It all depended on when the case was solved. Spencer and Ava were both disappointed. They had no idea of when they would see each other again. It could be a couple days, to a couple weeks. Hotch had left another assignments list should she finish the first and they aren’t back yet. She would have plenty to do while they were gone. Plenty to keep her mind off Spencer.

One day went by.. then two… and three… Ava had been keeping up with the case through Penelope. She was the only one who stays behind to work magic at her computer. Being their eyes and ears. Ava sat in the chair situated in the corner of Penelope’s office, watching her work. She answered a call from Morgan, “What can I do for you sweet face?”

“Hey baby doll, we need a location for a lead. His name is Bryant Jameson.” She started typing really fast, clicking away and mumbling to herself before finally finding it, “Location is 143 52nd street.”

“You never fail me baby girl,” He hung up quickly after that.

“So, how’s the case going?” Asked Ava, hoping for a positive reply, that they would be heading home soon. She missed talking with Spencer. He and Penelope were the only ones she’s become closer to.

“They should be home tomorrow if this lead doesn’t fall through.” Penelope turned in her chair to face Ava. “You sure are concerned about the case.” She raised a questionable eyebrow, twirling her pen.

Ava blushed a little and played it off, “Just curious is all. I’ve never been around this kind of stuff.”

Penelope nodded, not fully believing her. “So, you and Reid, you guys have hit it off, haven’t you?” she pushed.

“Yeah, he’s cool to talk too. He helped with stacking boxes the other day.” She brushed it off like nothing, at least hoping she did. However, she failed. Penelope could see right through her.

“Oh girl, we know. We saw you guys in the file room, giggling and talking like high school love birds.” Penelope joked, smirking, only causing Ava to blush more. Then, Penelope went serious, pointing her fluffy pen at Ava, “Just be careful about all that, okay? Hotch doesn’t allow relationships between co-workers within BAU. It makes things complicated.”

Luckily, the lead didn’t fall through and they were back in the office the next morning. Ava wanted to talk with Reid about the case and hear all about it, but she kept her distance, remembering Penelope’s warning. Spencer had noticed Ava became more distanced since he arrived back at work. They were fine when he left, talking when they got the chance, whether in the kitchen, copy room, or just walking by each other’s desk, what had changed? She had been busy all morning, or at least looking like it. She finally took a break and headed for the kitchen. Spencer took this chance to talk with her.

“Hey Ava.” Spencer entered the kitchen and put his hands in his pockets. Her heart skipped a beat when she heard him. This whole distance thing was going to be hard.

“Hey Reid. How was the trip?”

He walked to the fridge, pulling out a water, “it was good. Glad we caught the guy.”

Ava gave him a quick smile and continued making her coffee. Something’s wrong. He could tell. He furrowed his brows, “are you okay?”

She looked back up at him and nodded, hoping to convince him, “Yeah, I’m great.”

A lie. He’s an intelligent man, he can read right through people. He knows somethings wrong but didn’t want to push her. “Okay… well I guess I’ll let you get back to work.” He solemnly left and walked back to his desk, grabbing his jacket and mumbling to Morgan, “I’m going out to lunch.”

Ava had a crush on Spencer. She knew this and knew she shouldn’t. Dating co-workers was off limits. He is just too cute though. How could she resist him?

It had been a week since the kitchen conversation, and nothing had changed. They talked less throughout the day. It was only short conversations here and there. Both of them hated it. Spencer still didn’t know what had changed or if he had done something wrong to upset her. So on Friday morning on his way into work, he stopped by his favorite coffee shop and decided he would pick one up for Ava. Two and half teaspoons of sugar and splash of cream.

He walked into the office, two coffees in hand, his tan messenger bag hung over his shoulder. She had glanced up when she heard him say good morning to Morgan, but looked back down at her computer. Out of the corner of her eye she saw someone approach her desk. “I stopped on my way in and figured you might want one too.” He set the coffee next to her, giving a small smile.

He had brought her a coffee. Oh, come on Spencer, you aren’t making this any easier for her. She couldn’t resist it; coffee was her weakness. And so was Spencer’s damn smile. She tried to hold back a smile and took a sip of the coffee, savoring the taste. It was made just the way she liked it. How the heck did he know? Finally, she caved and smiled up at him, “it’s made just the way I like it. You must keep tabs on me.” She teased, causing him to blush, “Thank you.”

He nodded, “Good morning by the way. That now-storm is supposed to be coming in this evening.”

“I had heard about that. Maybe we’ll get snowed in together.” She meant it as a joke, taking a sip of her coffee, but it made his heart flutter. The thought of being snowed in with her, alone, being able to talk to her for hours… Uninterrupted. She had to admit, the thought was tempting. Stop it Ava.

“That wouldn’t be so bad,” he gave a quick wink and headed for his desk. It was his turn to make her blush and heart flutter.

About 5 hours later, Hotch came out of his office and ordered everyone to go home before the storm got bad. Ava was in the middle of working on a spreadsheet. She couldn’t stop, nor could she take the work home. Number one rule. Nothing leaves this office. “Sir, I only need another hour. I’m almost done.” She pleaded, staying one more hour wouldn’t hurt. It’s not like it would be that bad. Hotch agreed to let her stay, “One-hour Ava. No spreadsheet is worth your safety.” He said sternly. She nodded and quickly got back to work. Everyone had headed out. Except for one person; Spencer.

Spencer had just started the paperwork for the last case, and he was behind. He decided to stay for another hour to continue working on it. He didn’t even realize everyone had left. He was in the zone. Ava was the only one left still at her desk working. She had been so quiet; he hadn’t even noticed.

“Fuck!” She whispered angrily, typing angrily on the keyboard. He chuckled quietly to himself. She was cute when she was angry.

“Hitting on the keyboard like that won’t make it work better.”

She jumped, startled. She had been zoned in on the computer and didn’t realize anyone else had stayed to work. “Geez Reid, I didn’t even know anyone else was here.”

He chuckled, “I decided to stay a little longer. I only just started on this paperwork from the last case and I am super behind.” He stood and headed over to her desk, “What seems to be the problem?”

“I can’t get the fucking thing to organize the information correctly. I need it in this order, but it won’t let me.” She slid back from her desk a little, letting him peek at the computer. He leaned down and started typing and clicking around. She watched as he worked, concentrated on the monitor. A little of his tongue stuck out in concentration. She got a whiff of his cologne, it smelled woodsy with a hint of pine and mint. Tempting.

“and… there you go. All done.” He smiled stepping back, proudly.

“How… how did you?” Ava looked at the computer confused. She had been working on this for the last 20 minutes and got nowhere.

“You didn’t have the tab clicked yes.” He laughed, crossing his arms “It has to be clicked to yes for it to change.”

She groaned and face palmed. “it’s been a long day.” She leaned back in her chair and rubbed her temples.

“Why don’t you head home?” He questioned, pulling a chair up next to her.

“Because I want to finish this. I can’t leave things unfinished. I need to finish before I leave.”

He nodded and glanced at her desk, noticing the picture of the cat, “That is a fat cat.” He stated, laughing, causing her to laugh too. She grabbed the frame and handed to him. “That would be my cat Smokie. And yes, she is a very fat cat.”

He glanced over the picture, “you do know it is dangerous for cats to be overweight? Very unhealthy. It leads to a number of diseases.” He set the picture back where it was.

“Yes, which is why she is on a diet now.” She laughed and pulled herself closer to her desk, ready to get back to work.

“Good. Well, I will let you get back to work.” He stood and headed for his desk, getting back to work. He would work until she left. He didn’t want her alone in the building.

About half an hour later, Ava stood and stretched exclaiming, “Finally!”

“Done?” He asked, straightening the files on his desk.

“Yes, finally.” She started tidying up her desk, shutting down her computer. He had been done with his work for a while but didn’t want to leave her. He watched her start to put on her coat.

He looked out the window and saw the blanket of white snow falling. He stood to put his coat on as well. Come on spencer grow a pair, be a man.

“Ava, do you want to go get something to eat with me?” He blurted, before he had the time to chicken out.

It took her by surprise that she stopped putting on her coat and looked at him. Had he just asked her out? Had she really heard him right?

“What?” She asked, wanting to make sure she heard him right.

“Do you want to go get dinner... with me?” He glanced down and back up at her.

She grinned. She had heard him right. Her stomach grumbled at the thought of food, “Yes. I would love too.”

Both continued slipping on coats, hats, gloves and scarfs and headed out the door to brace the storm. He knew of a place close by. It was small hole in the wall, but they had great soup and soup seemed like the perfect meal to have with weather like this. He guided her to the restaurant, letting her wrap her arm around his, holding onto the crook of his elbow. He didn’t want her to slip on any snow. She still couldn’t believe he had asked her out to dinner and that she was holding onto his arm as he guided her to the restaurant.

Later that night after dinner, the snow fall had calmed.They managed to get a cab and pulled up infront of her place.

“Well this is me.” She smiled and turned to him, pulling her keys out of her purse.  

He nodded, “I’ll walk you to the door.” He told the driver to wait and they both stepped out and up the stairs to the door of her townhouse.

“I had a great time tonight.” He slid his hands in his pockets. He noticed her nose had turned a shade of pink from the cold.

She turned to face him and fixed her glasses back on her nose, sniffling, “Yeah me too.” She glanced back at her door, then at him, contemplating inviting him in for tea or coffee. Maybe she should wait. She didn’t get a chance to even make that decision before he spoke, “I would love to do it again. Go out to eat,” he smiled.

She bit her bottom lip and nodded, smiling, “I would love that..” They quickly exchanged numbers before saying goodbye. He walked down the stairs and got back into the cab, heading home.

Later that night before she went to bed, her phoned dinged. It was a text from Spencer.

Are you free for dinner tomorrow?

She grinned and slipped into bed, texting back: Yes:)

Soon after her phoned dinged again, Great. I’ll pick you up tomorrow at 6:30. Sleep tight.

She couldn’t contain her excitement. She knew she shouldn’t be excited. They shouldn’t be doing this. But it was only dinner, what could it hurt?

He had finally found the courage to ask her out and that dinner tonight was amazing. They talked and laughed the whole time. Like old friends who have known each other for years, like they clicked with each other and like it was meant to be. The last week of barely speaking was a blur. He didn’t care. They spoke all night at dinner and now, he had another date with her tomorrow. He couldn’t wait. That night he slept soundly, knowing he would see her again.

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And we have an official date!! Seems like they hit it off pretty good at dinner. Wonder how the next date will go ;) 

Also, let me know if you’d like to be added to my tag list for future chapters! 

[pynkhues]

i know that the audacity of what im about to ask is off the charts bc you're already too good to us, writing fic left and right and updating a lot soon but im SO weak over the parenting group!AU that im right here to beg for a snippet of it, if you feel like sharing!

Haha, the audacity is not off the charts at all! I can give you a snippet! Sorry it’s coming a little later – when you sent this to me this morning, I was like ‘oh god, everything I have is too ugly to post’ haha, so it gave me an excuse to tidy up a scene I’d drafted already which is fun! 

I will say as just a heads up, I’m operating now on a one-out-one-in system for multi-chaptered WIPs. So when I finish CYF (which is basically done, just got to post the epilogue!), I’ll be starting to post the pirate au, and when I finish See You in the Light, I’ll be starting to post this parents group au, and then finally when I finish If It Wasn’t for All the Lights, I’ll start to post the BDSM au! It’s probably a deeply flawed system, but it’s the one I’m going ahead with, haha.

Anyway! 

A snippet of the parents group au!

“C’mon, pop,” Rio grunts, trying to get the tabs free on the side of the diaper as Marcus kicks out his legs, squirming up the back of the change mat like he’s trying to slip up on out of the thing, and shit, the last thing he needs is the kid to smear Rhea’s Earth Mama Angel Bottom Balm up the back of his new hoodie.

“I have spare diapers if you need to borrow one,” Beth says at the change table beside him, having apparently gotten Jane into her new one in record speed, and Rio lets his gaze stick for a second, watching as she makes even easier work of getting Jane’s thrashing legs back into her pink polka dot leggings, like it’s nothing at all. It’s enough to make his jaw rock, his attention twisting back to Marcus, trying to get the tab unstuck again, but his fingers are still oily with the diaper rash cream, and Marcus’ face is gettin’ redder, and he just can’t get his grip.

He tugs Marcus back towards him, dropping a hand to his son’s belly, tickling a little to try and calm him down, even as he levels Beth with an irritated look.

“Yeah, what part of this looks like the diaper’s the issue?”

Somewhere outside, he hears her friend laughing, the sound loud and warm over the pinging arcade machines and the banging of the bowling balls hitting the polished floor of the lanes, the crack of one hitting pins, and - - and he ain’t being fair.

Knows that.

It’s not her fault he doesn’t know what the fuck he’s doing.

Still, when he glances sideways at her again, she’s unbothered by his tone – not pissed like Rhea would be, or wounded like his ma – and something about that bothers him more than it should. Instead, Beth shrugs, fixing her gaze back down on her daughter.

“It just looks like it’s one of those organic ones, right?” she says, gently lifting Jane to put her onto her belly for a few minutes of tummy time – just like Nance had told ‘em to in class – before turning to better look at Rio, her eyes tired as she watches him yank again on the tab of Marcus’ diaper. “I tried those with Kenny, and I just find the tabs always - -”

Riiiiiiiip.

He can feel his pulse in his throat as his cream-covered fingers clench around a handful of torn diaper, can feel it even harder behind his eyes, his blood thrumming hot beneath his skin and damn, it ain’t anger, it’s just - -

Fuckin’ exhaustion.

He pulls the diaper out from underneath Marcus’ bare, wet-with-diaper-cream ass and stamps his foot hard down on the peddle of the bin beside the change table, tossing the whole damn thing in with more force than necessary, and he’s expecting Elizabeth to have that look on her face again – that one that’s some mix of pity and judgement or even worry at seein’ a guy like him snap – but it ain’t even really a look at all. She’s just magicked up one of her kids’ diapers from that Mary Poppins bag of hers, and holds it out to him.

“If you loosen the tabs and open it up a bit before you get it under him it’ll be easier too,” she offers, and Rio grunts, plucking it from her hand and fixing his attention back on Marcus’ flailing legs, sucking in a breath to calm his frayed nerves, before gently lifting his son again to get the diaper up underneath him, adjusting it to get it in the right spot, trying to avoid Marcus’ kicking feet, and it’s just - - sudden.

That’s the thing.

Because Marcus’ legs calm down right in time with Beth’s arm suddenly pressing into Rio’s, and Rio blinks up to see Beth reached over and her finger is curled in Marcus’ tiny fish, and Rio tears his confused gaze away from Beth to look up and see his son smiling, that one that makes him look like the whole damn sun, and he keeps smiling, even when he shoves his fist – still clutchin’ Beth’s finger – right up into his mouth.

And he’s gonna stop it – ain’t like he loves other people’s kids chewing on his knuckles – but he finally gets Marcus properly into the clean diaper, and before he can do anything else, Beth’s just started talking.

“That is a strong grip,” she whispers, so quiet it’s almost like she doesn’t want Rio to hear, and her voice is light and bright in a way he ain’t really used to hearing. “And very warm slobber, which is what you want from slobber. I mean, can you even imagine cold slobber? Like a ghost. I will say Billy from class has some weirdly cold slobber, so you stay away from him, mister.”

Rio just - - blinks, his brow furrows, his lips parting, but when he opens them all the way, no words come out. Instead he just stands there like a dumbass, watching this woman half-bent over her kid and his at the change table of a bowling alley, her strawberry blonde hair falling down, concealing her face so all Rio can see is his son’s, and how whatever it is she’s doing makes his son happy, and he can’t really explain any of it, but he just - -

“Oh my god, Paulie! Twins!”

“Amber, don’t - -”

Whatever Paulie was about to say is lost to the rest of the parents’ room as Rio spins to see a skinny, leggy blonde thrust a toddler with milkshake-vomit down his shirt at some guy with frosted tips like this is the fuckin’ 90s, and dart towards them in a wave of too-sweet perfume. She’s so fuckin’ quick (or maybe just - - y’know - - awake given her kid’s old enough to vomit milkshake instead of formula), instantly peering over at Marcus and Jane on the change tables, an easier feat now that Beth’s standing up again, her finger reclaimed, rolling Jane back onto her back on the mat.

Amber’s cooing is instant, and Rio sighs, grabbing Marcus’ pants from where he’d slung them over his shoulder and starting to shake them out.

“Oh my goooodddd, they’re like those ones you see on TV! Paulie!! Look!! Like, one’s just like mommy, and one’s just like daddy.”

Which - - Rio blinks, looking sideways at Beth, who just seems to be watching Amber with that same neutral, Stepford Wife-look she gets in class. Rio sets his jaw, shaking his head, as he starts to bunch the pants up in his hands, ready to put them on Marcus, opening his mouth to correct the other woman.

“Nah, they ain’t - -”

“You think so?”

The words are offered so suddenly, so sharply, that Rio’s head spins back around to look at Beth again, his eyebrows raised at her interruption, but she doesn’t look back at him, just keeps her gaze fixed on Amber. She wrinkles her nose a little, purses her lips, before dropping a hand back to the change table while leaning forwards a little, almost conspiratorially.

“We’ve been thinking about signing them up for auditions, but I don’t know,” she waves a hand suddenly at Rio, who only blinks at her. “James here thinks it might not be the best idea.”

And okay, for starters, fuckin’ James? She really wants to play him like that? But also - - just - - y’know. What the fuck? Rio stares at her, taking in her widening eyes and her baggy mama sweater that does exactly zero to hide the fact that she’s stacked, but also the fact that she’s holdin’ herself kinda different all of a sudden. Like she’s caught him looking, her gaze darts towards him, and it’s so quick he almost misses it, the way she just sort of - -

Shrugs.

Rio scoffs a little – a sound Amber clearly reads as about the audition and not about this whole damn show – and turns around, putting on a smile for Marcus as he finishes bunching up the pants and pushing them up over his tiny feet.

“Men are always weird about this stuff, but you guys should totally be auditioning them! Like, I could literally see them in commercials for formula. You know they always put the cutest ones in them, because they want to trick regular people into thinking that their product’s gonna like, magic you a better-looking baby.”

Which - - look, Rio can’t exactly say it’s a surprise. He’s pretty sure his sister changed her kids’ brand of juice because one of the ads had one of the little girl’s playin’ Daisy Doctor instead of Holly Housewife. His thoughts are interrupted though when Marcus sneezes, and Rio leans over enough to grab a tissue from Beth’s diaper bag, vaguely aware of Paulie rounding the change tables for the sink, and tugging off his own kids’ shirt and it’s really only then that Rio realises he hasn’t even blinked at the smell of vomit, which - -

Okay, actually, that could be the fifteen years working in a bar.

“You know, I think I’ve heard that,” Beth says, and the girl makes a humming noise, her bowling shoes tapping a little on the tiled floor.

“Well, that’s an insider secret for you. I lived in LA for like, ever. It was almost two years. I mean, closer to one, but that’s basically 40 Hollywood years. I even once auditioned to play a mom in a Baby’s Only commercial. I mean I didn’t get it, but I think it was because I was like, too in shape, y’know?”

Which - - shit, Rio coughs a little to cover a sound he doesn’t even know, a laugh? A scoff? Why the hell is she even talkin’ to this woman?

“Wow,” Beth says though, her voice loaded with concern. “That’s gotta be discrimination.”

“I know right?”

And it’s Jane who wobbles at least, her bottom lip quivering, her legs kicking, and Beth turns around instantly, humming softly back down at her daughter, and before Rio can help it, his gaze darts over to her, watching as her face softens, her eyes glaze over, like they do sometimes, and he thinks of saying somethin’ to her, but shit, what? He doesn’t know jack about her.

A wave of perfume hits them again, and the second he finishes getting Marcus’ pants on, picks him up, turns around at the same time Beth does with Jane, Amber’s right in front of them, her gaze darting between Jane and Marcus, like she’s not sure which one to look at first.

Finally, she just sighs, clutching a hand forlornly to her chest.

“Like, I’m not even kidding. You made two really nice babies. Like, Paulie, tell them I’m not kidding.”

Over at the sink, Paulie grunts again, holding the toddler’s shirt under a furious stream of water, and Rio stares for a minute, watching the guy morosely clean up toddler vomit while the kid licks the rim of the sink. Rio resists the urge to gag as he bounces Marcus a little on his hip.  

“How’d you two even meet anyway?”

And at least that much he should’ve expected. Rio shakes his head, gaze fixing back on Amber, the words ready on his tongue, but before he can say a damn thing, Beth’s cut him off again.

“It sounds so weird, but it was actually at an underwater research center.”

Which - - okay - - what?

His gaze flicks back to Beth, but she ain’t looking back at him. She’s just got Jane curled into her chest, nestling her face into her breast, while Beth hums a little, just - - blatantly fuckin’ lying.

“I was studying - - ” outside, a bowling ball hits the floor hard. “How sound affects  - -“ she fingers her pearl necklace with the hand not clutching Jane, “Oysters, because I am a scientist, and James here was researching - - ” Beth’s gaze darts around, fixing on Marcus in Rio’s arms. “Marco Polo.”

Before Rio’s even had time to catch up to that, Paulie blinks up, confused, from his spot at the sink.

“In Detroit?”

It’s enough to make Beth stutter, her eyes blinking rapidly, and he really should just leave her to fix this herself, should leave her there gaping like a fish, scrambling for the tail-end of her own lie, and get back out to the group, but - - Rio sucks in a breath - - Marcus would be bare-assed right now if it wasn’t for her.

“Nah, man, west coast. We just moved back here to be close to family with the twins,” he drawls with a shrug, and maybe that makes it worth it – how quickly Beth reels around to look at him, and  - - shit, have her eyes always been that blue? Rio blinks, jerks his head back around to Amber, rolling his shoulders back to undo the sudden knot in them. “One of those things, yeah? We met workin’ out there, but turned out we were both from here.”

He means to leave it at that. Should, really, but all he can think about is her in class – prim and proper and that look again, like she’s judging him, and she got them into this, right? Before he can think twice, he drops his free hand to her lower back, smoothing it around to hold the soft hip furthest from him, smiling toothlessly as Beth stiffens and then pointedly, deliberately, relaxes, while Amber holds her hand to her chest again, hums an: “Aww, that’s how you know it’s meant to be!”

“That’s right,” Rio replies, and he watches Beth turn her face up to meet him, her gaze darting across his face like she’s trying to figure something out, and shit, he’s just trying to match what she’s laying down. After a moment, Beth spins into him, her free arm dipping around his back, and something in him sparks hot and he just - - he hadn’t known how fucking small her hands were until one squeezes at his waist.

“Right, honey,” she says, voice high and too-sweet. “I was just so lucky. And speaking of our families, we should really get back to them.”

After that, it’s easy enough to pack up the last of the diaper bags, for Amber to dip down to help Paulie and the kid, and for them to slip out again under the distraction, and it’s just fuckin’ weird, he thinks, to watch that little character Beth had invented – all ease and charm – slip off her shoulders like a cloak, and he means to let it go, because what skin is it off his nose if she’s some sort of pathological liar? But as they duck between the groups of sprawling teenagers and middle America families ordering fries and picking bowling ball weights, guys shoving each other at arcade games, and kids feeding quarters into claw machines, he just - - itches.

So maybe he steps a little slower, matching her pace, maybe he looks at her, amused, a little goading as he says: “So you in some secret, new mama improv group, or what?”

And Beth just - -

Shrugs, and shit, she doesn’t even look at him when she says:

“You don’t ever get bored of just being you?”

Rio blinks, his step slowing all over again, taking in her tired look, the diaper bag slung over her shoulder, that shirt she’s wearing, stained with grubby children’s fingers and milk, that damn new mama smell that’s always up his nose with her, and he just thinks - - nah, not really, but before he has the chance to say it, it’s like she’s read it on his face. She hoists a snuffling Jane up a little higher and moves faster than she has any right to. Back across the bowling alley, back into their lane, nestled in the shelter between her friend and her sister, away from him.

[rome5683]

My Secret Mate - Chapter Three

My body was warm all over. I squeezed them tighter to me, savoring the feeling it gave me to feel them against me. It was peaceful, and exciting at the same time. I groggily opened my eyes as I smelled something too delectable that caused a stir in my loins. My breath hitched, seeing his neck right against my lips. His scent was so amazing to me. I could feel my inner wolf stir, Mate. Mark him. He's ready, he's here. Just for us.

Mate or not, he's not our property. He should choose when to be marked, and when to take the next step in being mated. Calm down, Sirius. I took a deep breath, trying to soothe myself back into sleep. But I was suddenly aware of everything about Seth's body pressed into mine, so I got up. I regretted it the minute I got up, because the cold replacing him was blunt.

I ran a hand through my hair, and suddenly winced at the small headache that I felt in the back of my head. It wasn't that bad. As a werewolf, I had supernatural healing and it would go away very soon, which was also why I wasn't that drunk last night. But when Seth woke up, it would probably hurt him a lot more. I could feel Sirius frown at the idea of him in pain.

Protect him, help him. Help mate. I agreed, and walked downstairs. I was surprised to see the house wasn't that much of a mess. I walked into the living room to see Monsè picking up some cups here and there, and I could hear Lance cleaning in the kitchen.

"Hey, what happened after I went to bed?"

She gave me a hesitant face, almost as if contemplating what to say. "Well, Trent got super drunk and came onto Lindsay, which got him a painful shove. Then Bella got super sad and tried to get me to help her look for you, but then I saw you with... that guy."

My eyes widened, "Oh. Yeah, um, he's... wait, what exactly did you see?"

Her face reddened, looking away. "Well, I saw you guys kissing, and I immediately closed the door."

I blushed, feeling embarrassed about her seeing me that way. "Um, well. Did Bella see-"

"Are you gay?" Her question knocked me off balance, and I considered it for a second. Was I? I certainly wasn't attracted to anyone else anymore, but I still could appreciate women's bodies, as well as appreciate men's.

I shrugged, looking forwards the floor, "I think I'm bisexual. I don't know, everyone always assumes straight is the default. I guess, I assumed that too. But when I think about it... men can be attractive to me too."

I looked up to her nodding and going back to cleaning, and raised an eyebrow. "You don't care?"

She rolled her eyes, "Why should I? I only asked because I was curious why you'd make out with some random guy instead of Bella. And even though we're supposed to be super social as werewolves or whatever, you're not always one to go out of your comfort zone-"

"He's my mate."

She looked at me like a deer caught in headlights, showing how the new information was shocking. But then her face went back to its neutral expression, "Oh. That makes sense." Then her eyes widened, "Wait. Your mate's human?"

I nodded, "Yeah."

She winced, "Oof. I wouldn't wanna be you."

I frowned, a growl building up in my throat. "My mate is perfect for me, human or not."

She shook her head, "That's not what I meant. You're gonna have to mark him, and then that'll turn him, and make him go into heat if he hasn’t already. That's a lot of pain to go through for the both of you, especially the turning part."

This piece of information hit me like a ton of bricks. I remembered the first time I heard about it from the other wolves' gossip, about how one of the human mates had been going through the change and was in so much pain. I guess I was too confident about having a werewolf mate, that I forgot about what it meant to have a human mate.

I tried not to think about it as I went to the kitchen to get two cups of water. Lance raised an eyebrow at me as I entered, "So, your mate's a human guy?"

I hesitated, wondering where this was going. "Yeah, last time I checked."

"That's cool. So, he likes you back and everything. I mean, you guys kissed so that must mean he likes you."

I nodded, feeling a little sheepish. "Well, I hope so. We did talk a lot too so..."

He huffed, "Okay. Well, I have a friend..."

I tried to restrain my grin, and he rolled his eyes at me. "It's not me."

I withheld my laugh, feigning that I believed him as I nodded for him to continue.

"And this friend... he kissed his friend, a guy. But now his friend has been ignoring him... and my friend doesn't know why. I think it's cause my friend usually plays around a lot with girls, but maybe his friend doesn't like him the same way?"

I thought for a second, thinking how complicated it must be for him and Keith. "Sounds complicated. Maybe they should have a deep talk? Get everything off their chests."

Lance nodded, going back to washing the dishes while lost in thought. I filled two glasses with water before going back upstairs. I walked back into my room to see Seth on the phone, and I handed him his glass of water.

He looked up, his face still looking amazing with exhaustion tracing his features. His blush was entertaining to see, and I grinned.

"Mornin', beautiful."

He shook his head slightly as he drank his water, groaning. "That alcohol hit me hard."

I shrugged, "You weren't exactly super drunk, though."

"I don't get crazy, or anything. But the hangover is regrettable..."

"Oh." I went over to my bathroom, getting him some Tylenol from my mirror's cabinet. I walked over, feeling glad to be able to help his headache. "Here. It'll help."

Seth nodded, drinking the tablet down with water. I went over to my bedside table, grabbing my phone and checking the time. It was already ten in the morning, which was pretty late considering I woke up extra early everyday for school. "Any plans for today?"

He shook his head, "Not really, it is a Saturday. I was planning to stay at home and watch Netflix for the majority of it. Luckily, my mom's away on business, so she can't freak out about me being away last night."

"But your curfew-"

"I was just supposed to call her when I got home.”

"That's good, I guess. Wanna stay for breakfast?" I went to my closet, taking off my clothes from last night.

"Ye-Yeah. I don't really have much else to do..."

I pulled on some black joggers and a white tee. I pulled off my earrings, necklaces, and rings on my small jewelry stand. I glanced in the mirror, hoping my appearance was okay. I suddenly heard a loud heartbeat, and I looked over to see Seth's reddened face and wide eyes that were scanning me up and down.

I couldn't help the pride that came over myself when I saw the effect I had on him, "You okay?

He nodded, taking a deep breath. "Yeah. Um, I just couldn't help but notice you have a lot of defined... structure in your body."

I shrugged with a coy smile, sitting on the bed next to him, "I guess it's the genes."

"Mm." He bit his lip, and shook his head. "So, about last night-"

Monsè burst through the door, "MOM'S ALMOST HOME!" She ran over to me and Seth, dragging us by the hand to the living room. "YOU GUYS ARE HELPING!"

I nodded with a small gulp, suddenly remembering how much Monsè could be as scary as Mom sometimes. Seth got a broom out as I picked up the bigger pieces of trash on the floor, and when we were done with that, we cleaned the furniture for stains and crumbs of food. Monsè tidied up and re-arranged everything back to how it was, like the decor in the living room and the kitchen, as well as the photos in the hallway. Lance and I placed the audio and lights system in the garage, deciding it'd go there until Lindsay would come pick it up. I fell on the couch, sighing in exhaustion after an hour of cleaning. I could hear Seth and Monsè in the kitchen, making small talk as they both cooked breakfast. Lance sat beside me, "So does sex with a guy feel better than when it's with a girl?"

I sighed, feeling a sliver of offense and amusement at my brother's stupidity. "Have you even had sex with a girl?"

"Well-"

"Nope. You haven't. Because if you did, you wouldn't ask such a stupid question, Lance."

"Why is it stupid? It's a legitimate question-"

I felt exasperated, "Dude, I don't know. I haven't had sex with either gender, and I don't plan to have sex in general unless my mate says he'd like to."

"But, didn't he spend the night-"

"Which meant nothing. He stayed the night, and we slept. Literally. He's a human, remember? Most humans don't just sleep with someone right after meeting them, mates or not."

"Uh, I feel like that's not entirely true-"

"Lance." I gave him a deadpanned stare, "I really can't talk about this right now."

He gave me a knowing smile, "Sirius acting up?"

I cursed, hearing my wolf howl at the idea of mating Seth. "Like no tomorrow."

If you really cared about our mate, Sirius, you'd wait until he was ready.

I'm just excited. Leave me be.

You first.

"Yeah, I get you. Landon just loses his shit every birthday that gets closer to finding our mate."

I huffed, "You'll find them soon. Just, don't get too caught up in other people, it could just complicate stuff.

"Like you and Bella?"

I frowned, thinking how she might feel now. I did give her false hope, but hopefully she would take it well. "Yeah. I mean, I don't have feelings, but I know she does. I don't wanna hurt her."

"Seems a little late for that."

The smell of bacon drifted in the air, and my stomach growled. Lance sniffed the air with a groan, "Damn. That smells amazing."

I nodded in agreement as we both got up and walked towards the kitchen. I saw Seth slightly swaying back and forth on the stool as he ate a plate of egg, hash browns, pancakes, and bacon. There were two other plates awaiting on the island, Lance and I sat eagerly as Monsè served herself some milk in a cup.

Seth poured syrup on his pancakes, "Thanks for having me for breakfast, guys."

We all nodded, Monsè poured us cups of milk as she spoke. "What are mates for?"

I glared at her as Seth raised an eyebrow, "Mate?"

Monsè and Lance shared a smirk as she continued, "Yeah, you know. Friends, pals, buddies..."

I seethed, and interrupted quickly, "So what does your mom work in?"

He looked to me, "Oh. She's a social worker. Sometimes she goes to different counties which makes me have the house to myself."

Lance grinned, "Must be fun. You ever throw parties?"

He shook his head with an amused smile, "Not really, I just like to watch Netflix and read books.”

I took another bite of my bacon strip, "I don't usually throw parties but, I figured it'd be cool to have one big one for the special eighteen, you know?"

He nodded, I continued, "When's your birthday, Seth?"

He sipped at his milk, "May."

I was stumped for a second, "Wait. Doesn't that mean you should be-"

"I should've graduated, yeah. I was..." His cheeks reddened, "Held back. Unfairly, might I add."

I chuckled, "What happened?"

My siblings gave him an expectant look, and Seth sighed. "Okay, but you can't laugh."

"Alright."

"So, I was in fifth grade, and on the day of the state test, I got super sick and had an urge to vomit all the time. But it was, like, state tests so I had to go, and when I finished the test, I vomited all over the tests. It was the holes you fill in with bubbles so..."

Monsè gasped, "No."

Lance and I groaned in unison at the embarrassment of it.

"Then, the school and my mom decided I should redo the year over so I can take the test again- which sucked- but it's whatever."

"At least we got to meet."

He looked up, a blush rising to his cheeks. "Yeah, I guess. Listen, I need to talk to you-"

The lock clicked, and everyone but Seth turned to the front door from the kitchen. We could hear them muttering, and I laughed at one of their comments that I could make out.

"It smells like teen desperation in here."

Seth looked at me confused, and I shook my head.

Monsè whacked the back of my head and I winced, pointedly glaring at her. Her loud and scolding voice rang in my head, ‘Could you be any more obvious?’

"Ooh, it smells delicious-" My mom stared with wide eyes at Seth, she hadn't been able to smell him due to the other smells lingering in the house from the party no doubt, and was certainly surprised. She looked at me with a raised eyebrow, "It's okay I'm confused, right? Who is this? You didn't tell me someone was sleeping over."

My father followed in right after, looking at all of us with a confused gaze. "Um, what's going on?"

I scratched the back of my neck, "Mom. Dad, this is my ma-"

Seth interrupted, standing up and extending his hand. "Friend. Seth Truman." His nervous chuckle rang in my mind as I gave him a questioning glance, and even Monsè and Lance looked at me confused. What did he think I would say? Why did it matter? I wondered how much longer I would have to court him in a human way... "Sorry to barge in. I kind of crashed after the party last night."

My mom practically gushed, and looked at me while questioning me through the mind link. ‘Is this your mate?’

I nodded, scratching my neck in slight embarrassment. It wasn't that I was embarrassed of him, hell no. It's just that my mom was very sweet and open, that she was obviously adored with my mate as well, and that she might embarrass me. Who wouldn't be?

"Oh, it's no trouble at all. We're happy to accommodate you." My dad smirked at him from behind my mom as he spoke, and I shook my head in annoyance. My dad gave me a raised brow and I rolled my eyes at his smug expression.

"Ah." Seth chuckled nervously, "Thanks. Your daughter is really good at cooking."

Monsè smirked, and my mom smiled.

"Yeah, she's really big on cooking." I gave him my most charming grin, and he avoided my eyes with a small blush forming on his cheeks. "How about you?"

He looked at Monsè, "So do you always make pancakes from scratch?"

I scowled, and I could hear Sirius whimper in the back of my head. My jaw clenched, and I didn't know whether to be angry or sad. He was sending me mixed signals, and I didn't want that: just tell me everything clearly for fuck's sake. I didn't want to let my anger cloud my judgement, but I also wanted to give him the cold shoulder if he was going to do the same to me.

My mom's hands massaged my shoulders, and I couldn't help but feel calm and relaxed at the notion. I placed my hand over hers and squeezed it, thanking her for the help. My dad was next to us too, hugging her from behind and resting his head on her shoulder. I looked up and smiled softly, talking with them through the mind link, ‘Thanks.’

‘Of course, darling.’

Seth stood up from the barstool, "It was nice for you guys to have me, but I really should be heading home now."

"I'll drive you." I say as I stand up abruptly, and he was about to protest until my sister just patted his shoulder and shook her head. She knew damn well I was too stubborn. He nodded, understanding what she meant.

I took another bite of my plate and told Monsè to save it for me before going upstairs to get a hoodie and my shoes. I came back down in a hurry, and grabbed the keys beside the door, "Seth!"

He came from the hallway after I heard him say his goodbyes to my family, and I opened the door for him chivalrously.

We got in the truck, and I sighed as I sat down. I tried not to glance at him while I made sure the mirrors were okay, and I put on my seatbelt after starting the car. I was hoping to make conversation, so I left the radio off as I pulled out of the driveway. Seth looked out of the window and rested his chin on his hand, and I laughed mentally when I remembered that he'd have to give me his address. I could just drive around until he decided to speak up, and it'd be hilarious. I turned left, and went towards my favorite burger joint.

I glanced at him before speaking up, "So, what is it you wanted to talk to me about?"

I pulled into the burger joint's drive-thru line, awaiting for my turn, and he sighed. "Okay. So about last night, what we did-"

"Was amazing." I smirked at him as I remembered the feeling of his body against mine while we slept. His lips were really nice too.

"It was a mistake." Seth twiddled his thumbs, and I felt a breath escape me. What was he saying? "Look, you're really nice and everything. But I know you and a girl named Bella have something going on, and... I don't want to be caught in the middle."

I cursed inwardly. I couldn't believe I would mess something up like this, and I wondered why I messed with Bella in the first place. Oh, because I didn't want a mate. Well, I changed my mind. I liked him, the feeling of him with me was amazing. I was keeping him, end of story.

"Bella and I were never even together." I pulled up in line, almost close to the order section. "So we messed around a couple times, it meant nothing."

"Maybe to you, but it means a lot to her." He scoffed, and I suddenly realized something.

"Wait, how do you even know this?"

He looked away before cursing under his breath.

"Did my sister-"

"No. Last night, I could see the way she looked at you." I narrowed my eyes, knowing he was keeping something from me. "Fine. I overheard you and Lance talking."

"Oh." I tensed up, then relaxed when predicting it was probably the last part of the conversation since he wasn't concerned about the other parts. "What I said still stands."

"But it didn't mean anything! It was just a drunken kiss-" I interrupted his exasperated rant.

"Not for me." I gave him a hardened stare, clenching my jaw in determination. "I like you, okay? And I want to get to know you."

He looked shocked, and sat back in his seat as he thought to himself. I awkwardly pulled up to the order section of the drive-thru, and asked for two milkshakes.

"I'd like strawberry, please."

I nodded, changing Seth's to strawberry, and made mine Oreo. It was only seven bucks, and was well worth it. I parked in the lot outside and Seth raised a curious brow, "Why aren't you driving me home?"

"I don't really feel like it." I grinned, feeling amused now. Had he noticed yet?

"What are you talking about? You said you would." He furrowed his brows, starting to look angry. I shrugged, nonchalant.

"I changed my mind." He was about to protest when I chuckled, "I'm kidding. You never gave me your address."

"Ohhh." He blushed, embarrassed and I chuckled again.

"It's okay." I tossed him my phone, "Just type it in."

He sipped noisily while typing it in, blushing as I gazed at him while sipping my own drink. It was tasty, but all I could think of was how I woke up next to him in bliss. He handed the phone back to me, and I memorized the route there before placing it in the middle. It wasn't that far, and I parked in his driveway no later than ten minutes.

He ran his hand through his hair with a sigh as I shifted the gear into park. He silently got out of the car, and I wondered for a moment if I should let him go like this. I could hear Sirius whimpering, and I decided I couldn't just leave it like this.

I got out of the car in a hurry, and he looked at me in surprise in front of his door. I scratched the back of my neck in anxiousness, "So about earlier..."

"I can't." Seth held the bridge of his nose, seemingly frustrated. I looked at him, feeling confused.

"Well, why not?"

He groaned, "What part of it being meaningless don't you understand?"

"What part of this," I grabbed his hand and placed it on my chest, feeling the same sparks from last night, from every time I've ever touched him, all over again, "do you not understand? I know you feel it too."

He looked conflicted, his eyes shutting as if in concentration as his body reacted to my subtle touch. My thumb rubbed across the back of his palm, and he huffed at me with a glare. I knew I looked desperate, but I couldn't help it. At first, I thought having a mate would be disastrous and painful. Being forced to be with someone, like some Neanderthal from the 1800s, or something. But then I saw that it wasn't really forced, and that it was a real connection.

"We have something. Don't deny it." His hand slowly became a fist against my chest, but I still held it there as I gazed at him. I silently whispered, "Please."

Seth's eyes met mine, searching for what, I have no idea. He was about to speak when a voice interrupted, somewhat smooth and high-pitched.

"Babe!" His hand quickly retracted from mine, and we both looked towards the sidewalk in front of his house. "Hey, I left you tons of messages. We were supposed to hang out this morning, remember?"

My wolf growled as I observed her, suddenly seeing an obstacle to his mate. She was a little shorter than Seth, with long black and wavy hair. She was slim, with average sized assets. Her face was heart shaped, with pretty red lips that complimented her pale skin and her eyes were big with brown doe-like eyes. She was pretty.

As she embraced him, he gave me a guilty expression while he hugged her back from the waist. My eyes widened as I realized what must've been obvious by now. Seth had a girlfriend.

"Oh fuck."

She looked up at me in confusion, and Seth visibly paled. I couldn't help the laugh that escaped me, my emotions becoming numb as one ruled above the others; anger.

"I can't believe this..." I shook my head, murmuring to myself as I was almost seething at this point. "Motherfucker..."

"Can't believe what?" Her question had an edge, and I felt like a deer caught in headlights. I immediately turned on my charm, chuckling as I pretended to be bashful.

"How pretty you are. I mean, who thought Seth would have such a hot friend?"

Her eyes widened, and I laughed again before speaking up again.

"Oh, wow. How rude of me," I grinned mischievously as I extended my hand out to her, "My name's Xavier, with an X."

She smiled, her eyes still somewhat confused as she placed her hand in mine. I brought it up to my mouth, placing a ginger kiss on the back of her palm while she blushed. I could feel Seth's glare, but I kept my gaze trained on her as I let go of her hand. This is what I get for actually liking my mate. I should've rejected him from the start. God, I want to forget ever meeting this bastard. This hot bastard...

She chuckled, nervous, "My name is Cassie. It's nice to meet you."

"I assume you're single." I bit my lip with a smile, coyly crossing my arms to flex my muscles. Yes, I was being a douche on purpose.

"Oh." She laughed again at my flattery, "No. Seth here is actually my boyfriend."

I laughed back, still focused on her while I could see Seth's jaw clench from my peripheral view. "Oh. Yeah, I was hoping not."

I narrowed my eyes at Seth with a scowl. Cassie raised an eyebrow, and I shrugged as I grew a grin again.

"You know, because you're pretty."

"How do you know my boyfriend again?" She shook her head with a scoff, but still smirked.

"He went to my party last night. I had to let him crash at my place because he got a little rowdy, to say the least." I smirked back, and she looked at him with a questioning expression. He guiltily smiled, and she chuckled. "Then I drove him home after a nice breakfast. So, yeah."

She smiled again, "Well, thanks for that. I really appreciate you taking care of him."

"Yeah." I scoffed at the unknown innuendo she just made, and I laughed sarcastically. "Yeah, I took care of him. He was practically all over me too."

She gasped and Seth cursed under his breath.

"Seth, I didn't know you got that drunk." She pressed her hand up to his forehead, "Do you have a headache?"

He shook his head, smiling the fakest smile I've ever seen, and glanced at me nervously. I nodded while scolding myself, practically wanting to die right then and there.

"Well," I clapped my hands together, "I gotta get going. It was nice meeting you, Cassie," I extended my hand out and shook hers gently, then patted Seth on the shoulder roughly. "And it was good hanging out with you last night, Seth."

He nodded, his smile more like a grimace. I turned, feeling defeated before I came up with an idea suddenly.

"Hey, Seth!" Both he and his girlfriend turned around, Cassie curious and Seth panicking. I smirked, "Don't forget about our study session this Monday!"

She looked up at him, no doubt wondering what I meant, and he raised an eyebrow at me. I smiled, "You said you'd help me with History at my house after school this Monday, remember?"

I didn't have history.

Seth made a surprised expression before quickly giving me a thumbs-up. He then took his girlfriend by the waist, and turned her towards the front door while he discreetly gave me the finger. I laughed sarcastically to myself before opening my car door and sitting down in my seat. I turned the radio to my favorite station, and drove home.

The minute my bedroom door closed behind me, I exhaled heavily. The weight in my chest was so heavy. I felt like I couldn't breathe, and I wondered if my family would ask me what was wrong if I cried. Luckily, I'd managed to avoid them as I stomped up to my room, but no doubt they already knew something was up.

I went into the bathroom, turning on the shower on it's heaviest. I took a deep breath as I looked myself in the mirror, trying to calm down, but I could feel the familiar sensation of my eyes tearing up. I clenched my fists as I choked up, and the sob broke out before I could stop it. I grit my teeth to try to stop it, sniffling while my hot tears were flowing now, but it didn't work.

This whole situation brought up things I'd rather forget. But I couldn't, no matter what I did, they stayed with me.

I had walked up to him during recess, smiling, 'Hey, why didn't you come over the other day?'

His eyes were hardened, and his mouth turned upwards in a scowl before he spat out the words I remembered all too well.

'Why do you care so much?'

I was about to respond, but he had already said the worst part.

'What are you? Gay?'

I shivered now as I did back then, exhaling deep as to not induce another sobbing fit. But right now, it was already too late, I was crying and I couldn't stop it.

I shivered now as I did back then, exhaling deep as to not induce another sobbing fit. But right now, it was already too late, I was crying and I couldn't stop it.

He was another closeted male, except this time it was worse. He was my mate, my soulmate, and he had a girlfriend. I cursed the moon goddess, hoping I'd get smite down to avoid the pain of this. Unfortunately, the pain never went away.

It had already been an hour, and I heard my cellphone ring in my back pocket. It was Bella. I debated what to do, and Sirius practically screamed at the notion. I shook my head as I answered it.

"Hey."

———

The full story below:

[seachanqe]

write the softest words and kiss them

My first entry for Aspec Martin Blackwood Week, using the prompt “Poetry”!

Tags/Warnings: Internalized Acephobia, Aro-Ace Martin Blackwood, Demi-Aro Martin Blackwood, ace relationship, Non-sexualized intimacy, Post-159

Relationship: Martin Blackwood/Jonathan Sims

Summary: Jon had walked into the Lonely and saved him from his own personal hell; he saw Jon, he felt the force of that love. It was all-encompassing, a choking, bright explosion, and after everything, Martin's afraid. He's afraid he's not a worthy recipient of those feelings, he's afraid his own version of-- of-- that emotion won't be enough for Jon. But Jon's Seen him, and he's still here. That-- it has to mean something, even if it's out of misguided pity or obligation.

Or: As they both recuperate from escaping the Lonely, Martin shares with Jon his feelings and fears related to love, through an explanation of his relationship with love poetry.

Read on AO3 or below

Pale, pink dusk light filters through the dust-filled air of Martin's neglected-of-late flat. Martin flicks on the hall light, blinking as he adjusts to the sudden flood of light. Routine kicks in and he toes off his shoes. Out of the corner of his eye, he sees that Jon follows his lead, though he makes sure to untie his first before setting them neatly next to Martin's. Martin's mind stalls on the sight of Jon's shoes next to his, though he can hardly process why at the moment. The warm weight of Jon's hand settles on Martin's back.

"Martin?" Jon murmurs with unconcealed concern, and steps closer; Martin knows the simple utterance of his name is many questions at once: Is everything okay? Are you still here with me? And-- and-- He flinches away from the emotion seeped into every syllable Jon utters; it's just too much, everything feels too much, especially when what he feels might not be enough for Jon. Jon had walked into the Lonely and saved him from his own personal hell; he saw Jon, he felt the force of that love. It was all-encompassing, a choking, bright explosion, and after everything, Martin's afraid. He's afraid he's not a worthy recipient of those feelings, he's afraid his own version of-- of-- that emotion won't be enough for Jon. But Jon's Seen him, and he's still here. That-- it has to mean something, even if it's out of misguided pity or obligation.

Martin takes a quick, deep breath, before nodding in what he hopes is a reassuring manner. "Yeah, yeah. I'm--I'm fine."

Jon appears unconvinced but nods back, his eyes never leaving Martin's face, his hand clenched in Martin's shirt as if he's afraid Martin will disappear in front of him and he'll need to pull him back. Martin simultaneously relishes and shies away from the attention; it's everything he's wanted and at the same time too much for him to handle. He had spent months purposefully withdrawing from his own life, and he's suddenly being properly seen, by the person he cares most about in the world. And although it's overwhelming, he can't help but also be drawn into it, like a moth to the flame. So few people in his life have offered to love him so freely, he can't help it. He tries to bury his dread, at least for now, for what he sees as an inevitable fallout; later, he tells himself, later .

Martin's flat is small; the short hallway they stand in leads to a combo kitchen and living room, and a door off the left to his room and bathroom.

"Jon? I--" He looks apologetically at Jon, with a quick glance over his shoulder where he can feel Jon's hand. "I need to close the curtains and turn the rest of the lights on."

"Mm? Oh, oh right, sorry, of course." Jon pulls his hand away, to rub at his own neck instead, in a familiar, awkward gesture that unexpectedly brings a smile to Martin's face.

"Thanks," Martin says softly, before retreating. He makes quick work of it and, out of instinct and a bit of embarrassment, begins to tidy up a bit. Books, used tea mugs, chipped plates with crumbs, haphazard pieces of trash, and random articles of clothing are all strewn about the living room. Martin had hardly been expecting guests; he honestly hadn't expected to still be alive, let alone have Jon in his flat.

"You don't-- Martin, it's fine."

Martin glances up at Jon, his arms full of clothes. Jon had been not-so-surreptitiously looking around while Martin had started cleaning, and was currently standing by his old, rickety desk.

"Is it?" Martin asks, and he can't stop his voice coming out higher pitched than usual. "It's a mess, Jon, I'll just--"

"Martin--"

"--put these clothes away, and finish tidying up the coffee table and end table--"

"It's fine, Martin. Really. You're tired. I'm tired. Please." Jon's voice drops to a pleading tone, and as much as Martin wants to be stubborn, he feels himself giving in. Jon's right--he's tired. And he doesn't want to keep Jon up either.

"Okay, fine, but only cause I already cleared the couch. And I'm making tea first no matter what you say. Then we can sleep"

Jon breaks into a fond, albeit weary, smile. "That's-- that sounds nice. Thank you, Martin."

---

While the tea is seeping, Martin looks up to see Jon holding one of his notebooks, an odd expression on his face. Tilting his head to read the front, Martin squints at the notebook in Jon's hand and immediately has a minor heart attack.

"Jon!" he blurts, starting forward. Jon flushes, nearly throws the notebook back on the desk, and immediately raises his hands, apologetic.

"I-- S--sorry, I didn't mean, I just-- I saw it and I--I suddenly knew -- I knew ," Jon says in a rush, "I didn't mean to know, I swear, I just-- it just happened."

Martin snatches the notebook from the desk, holding it so tightly he could feel the edges dig into the palm of his hand.

Biting his lip, Martin looks down at the notebook. It had been a while since he had opened it and read its contents, and even longer since he had written anything in it.

"What do you know?" he asks, heart in his throat.

"I'm so sorry, Martin. All I know is that it's-- it's some of your poetry," Jon says shakily.  "I missed it," he adds, softly, like a wish, almost to himself.

Martin meets Jon's eyes, searching for deceit, for some proof that this is a joke, but Jon's earnest and pleading in a way Martin's never seen before.

"You've missed it?" Martin asks incredulously. "When have you ever-- "

"Oh god--" Jon's blush has spread to his ears, and Martin tries to ignore how adorable it looks. "Uh a few years ago, when I thought--" He sighs. "It doesn't matter. I was going through the trash, and found a few of your poems."

"Of course you did," Martin says with a sigh. "And then you read them."

"Yes," Jon whispers. "But," and his voice grows more loud, more certain, "I-- I liked them Martin. I missed having those little pieces of you around. I--I missed you ."

Martin can feel himself turning red now, and jumps on his immediate instinct to change to the subject.

"Tea's ready! Here," he says, tossing the notebook back down on the desk. "Go sit on the couch and I'll bring it over before it gets cold."

Jon murmurs his agreement and thanks, but doesn't comment on the change of subject.

---

Both too stubborn to take the couch, they end up agreeing to share Martin's bed. Too exhausted to change the linens, Martin halfheartedly apologizes for the musty sheets before collapsing into bed. He tries not to think about how this is the first time he's ever shared a bed with anyone, let alone someone who he--he... cares about so much.

---

The next morning, they decide to continue to hide away in the flat, both unwilling to risk being discovered until they hear from Basira. Martin gets to work after breakfast tidying up the flat with Jon's help.

"When did you start writing poetry?" Jon asks nonchalantly, no compulsion in his voice, as he folds freshly laundered bedding. Jon had insisted; apparently among Jon's many talents was folding a fitted-sheet perfectly.

Martin nearly drops his washcloth, and glances over at Jon, eyebrows raised. "Where's this coming from, then?"

Jon bites his lip, and gives a little shrug. "I--I don't know everything, Martin. Not the things I want to know."

Martin shakes his head. "Why would you want to know about this?" Martin asks, unable to keep the self-deprecation out of his voice.

"Martin," Jon says, in that damned voice, soft and laced with pure emotion. He had no idea Jon could even sound like that until a few months ago. Jon sets down the sheet he had been folding, and walks over to him, arms outstretched. Martin almost flinches away, but when Jon hesitates before him, clearly waiting for an okay, Martin sighs and gives a little nod. Jon wraps his arms around Martin, and runs his hand up and down Martin's back soothingly. "Martin," he says again, just a whisper, before pulling back, his hands falling to Martin's waist. "Is this okay?" Jon's warmth is a comfort, an anchor.

"Yes, yes. But, you still haven't answered my question."

Jon's hand, so assured, moves to his face, cupping his jaw, cradling his head. Martin squeezes his eyes shut at the casual show of affection.

"Because it's important to you, Martin. I--I love you." Martin's heart jolts, and his throat feels full of cotton, and he swallows, jaw clenched, refusing to cry. "And because of that I want to--to know everything about you."

After several long moments, when he's sure he won't start crying, Martin finally responds, glancing at Jon before quickly looking away. "Okay," he says, more raspy than he would like, "Okay. I, uh." Martin winces. "Jon, I, I care about you a lot too, I-- fuck."

He pulls away from Jon, his hands clutching the back of the sofa. Jon lets go of him, apparently reluctantly, and steps back, concern etched across his face. "Martin, its fine, you don't have to--"

"I-- It's complicated, Jon," Martin interjects. "I do... love you? I just," Martin runs a hand across his face, exhaling slowly. "Let me answer your original question. It will explain things better."

Jon nods, no less concerned, but waits, watching Martin intently. Martin's used to that though, it's almost comforting, the normality of it.

"When I was 9 or 10, I guess? Used to write instead of listening to the teachers. Kept at it even though I was never able to take any formal classes, but learned by trying to emulate poets I admired: Dickinson, Blake, Frost, Whitman, Keats."

"That's admirable."

Martin squints at him, unable to help being wary for a sign of any mocking. Jon looks stricken. "Martin, I'm serious I promise. You didn't-- You didn't have the opportunities that others had, but you still-- You did it anyway."

"I have a harder time reading modern poets. It's hard-- it's hard for me to sort out the good from the bad. And there's," Martin winces, "some stuff I'd rather not read."

Jon's interest is clearly piqued. "Like what? If you don't mind sharing."

Martin gives him a pained look, a feeling of dread in his gut. "Love poetry-- don't laugh-- It's just-- I hate the tone of it, and then there's all those break-up poems and heartbreak and I just… I don't get it. It's not for me," he finishes, a touch too defiant.

Jon tilts his head slightly, questioning and bemused.

Under his scrutiny, Martin folds inward. He grasps his hands together, his head bowed. "I don't-- I usually don't feel that way. And I didn't like to read what I'm missing," he says in a small voice. Jon says nothing, but his hand twitches, like he wants to reach out. Martin takes a deep breath, and continues.

"Jon, I don't usually get crushes-- I, uh, actually never had one before you, and all this time I wasn't even sure that it was an actual," Martin couldn't help how his voice curled with aversion, " crush . All I knew is that I wanted to see you happy, I wanted to help you, protect you, I-- that I would do anything for you. I care, I care so, so much, I may even love you. I just-- I don't know what that is, and I don't want to promise anything that might-- that might go away. And, Jon, I'm terrified ."

"Martin," Jon says, voice raw and aching, and it's too much, Martin's terrified of what Jon will say. Jon will leave him, walk away, and, if he's being honest with himself, it's probably for the best.

Jon reaches forward, gently covering one of Martin's hands with two of his. "I get it--or at least I think I do--this… stuff," Jon says, echoing Martin's tone of aversion, "is complicated, ephemeral. I have similar struggles with trying to define how I feel when it comes to relationships, love, though I do not wish to claim it's exactly similar to your experiences."

"If you still want a relationship, if you want to try this, being together, I want that too. Any version of us would make me so happy. But if you--if you aren't comfortable with it, if it's too much, that's--that's fine. A world with you in it is enough for me."

Martin bites his lip, considering what Jon's said, wisps of bitter skepticism clouding his thoughts, even as tears burn at the corners of his eyes. But Jon's hands are warm around his. Jon's hands don't cling at him, but simply rest there, a steady, solid weight. Something real , offered freely, with no strings attached, no expectations. And he knows what Jon's said, what Jon's offered contains no lie. The tears bud like flowers, and fall down his face.

"Okay," Martin whispers, "Okay."

Jon leans forward, enfolding Martin in his arms, and Martin rests his head on Jon's shoulder, taking a deep breath to calm his racing heart.

After several long moments, Martin gives a damp laugh. "Don't expect me to write you any love poems though."

Jon inhales, clearly ready to disavow any need for love poems, but Martin pulls back slightly before he can, so that he's looking into Jon's eyes. "I actually tried, you know. When I realized how--how strongly I felt about you. I got excited, that I might be able to write a love poem, but--hm. It felt, hm… wrong, I guess? But," he adds quickly, "it's nothing personal, I just. Like I said, don't like 'em."

"That's fine, Martin. I would be honored to hear any of your poetry, though."

Martin rolls his eyes, a small smile peaking through, like the sun on a cloudy day. "Persistent, aren't you. How about later today?"

"I'd like that," Jon says, and Martin could lose himself in the quiet, joyful mood Jon radiates. "Thank you, Martin," Jon says, like he isn't giving Martin everything, like he isn't the most wonderful man Martin's ever met, like he isn't accepting everything Martin is and continues to love him.

Martin leans towards Jon, scrutinizing his face, trying to memorize all the little details from his many scars that pepper his cheeks, to the small mole on his jaw, to the rich brown-gold of his eyes. Jon gazes back, his expression reverent. With some apprehension, Martin presses a kiss to Jon's forehead, a mere brush of lips.

"Is this okay?" he asks, biting his lip as he pulls back.

Jon gives a little laugh, warm and breathy, and nods. "It's--it's good, Martin." And despite Jon glancing down at where Martin's biting his lip, Jon doesn't surge forward to claim a kiss, but continues to let Martin lead. Martin considers Jon's nose; it's always cute when Jon scrunches it. Martin presses a kiss to the tip of his nose, and drinks in the nearly dopey smile on Jon's face when he pulls back again. He did that.

"Would it--would it be okay if we finished up the… the," Martin attempts, waving a hand vaguely towards the pile of unfolded laundry. His own washcloth was somewhere behind him.

"Of course, Martin." Unexpectedly, Jon doesn't look put-out by this, but appears happy to return to his folding. "If you don't mind though, I'd like to--to talk more about this later? There's some stuff about me I want to share as well."

"Oh! Yeah, oh god, sorry, I--"

"Martin!" Jon says sharply, but not unkindly. "Martin, don't apologize, there's nothing to be sorry about. I just think--" Jon exhales. "This heavy stuff needs to be in small doses, there's only so much we can handle at a time."

"That--that makes sense. But whenever you want to talk about it, I'm here."

"Yes," Jon says, with a warm, gentle smile. "You're here."

[universe-n-3276]

Carrying the Moon

Chapter 17

Notes: Mild smut at the beginning but you can skip it.

It had officially been a year since Hero was born, and when Sander woke up that morning, he smiled happily. Being back to live in the house where he grew up had other benefits besides not having to pay the rent. To seek some chill during the hot summer days, he and Robbe no longer had to rely on their old broken fan, in fact, they had all the air conditioning they needed.

He could cuddle his fiance whenever he wanted, and not staying away from him just because even the idea of touching each other made both of them sweat.

He snuggled to Robbe's back, hugging him and kissing his shoulder. He felt the other sigh and draw closer, intertwining their legs together

“Morning, beautiful.”

“Good morning, my king.”

Sander smiled at that name. Every time those words left Robbe's lips, there was always something inside him that felt the need to show off. Maybe it was pride or his possessiveness, or maybe he wanted to prove he deserved that title. He kissed the back of his fiance's neck and slipped a hand under his shirt, stroking his bare abdomen and starting to play with the hem of his boxers.

“You are in a good mood.”

“I'm always in a good mood when I can be with you in the morning.”

Robbe laughed, letting Sander take control of the situation. He closed his eyes, sighing, when his fiance slid his boxers to his mid-thigh, letting out a moan as his fist closed around his length.

“Your hands are too cold.”

“Sorry.”

Sander left a kiss on Robbe's shoulder still covered by his shirt and turned to get the lube.

“Can you wear a condom? I don't wanna shower again. We have so many things to do for Hero's birthday party today.”

He got a raised eyebrow and a muffled chuckle, in response. Robbe rolled his eyes, kicking off his boxers.

“Sander, please! I also don't wanna change the sheets. Again.”

Sander finished undressing Robbe completely and pushed him back on the mattress, then placing his hands on his fiance’s knees to make him spread his legs.

“This is not something we have to do, Robbe. Just tell me if you don’t feel like it.”

Robbe blinked, looking his fiance in the eyes. He was still fully clothed, kneeling in front of him, holding his legs open by his knees. He suddenly felt more self-conscious and turned his face to avoid those green eyes that were always too intense.

“Sorry.”

“You don't have to say sorry.”

Sander let go of Robbe’s legs and went to lay down beside him, covering them both with the blanket. He ran his fingers through the other’s curls, trying to catch his gaze.

“We don't have to do anything, but when we make love, it's about you and me and nothing else. Screw the party, the sheets, the shower. I just wanna be with you. I wanna feel you, I wanna take my time to make you feel good, feel loved. That’s what matters to me, okay?”

Robbe nodded, stroking Sander's cheek. Sometimes it was easy to get lost in the routine. Forget that the two of them were sharing their life because they loved each other more than anything, and not because they were in the midst of that chaos together by chance. They had chosen to be together in the midst of that chaos. They were in the foreground, the rest was just background noise. Robbe felt incredibly lucky, at that moment, to be loved by someone like Sander, who was able to keep focusing on him, even when the noise surrounding them was damn loud.

He took off his fiance's shirt and dragged him on top of himself, kissing his lips with all the emotion he was feeling at that time. Robbe needed to be one with Sander, the rest was just rust and stardust.

*

Sander was still breathing heavily as he pressed kisses to Robbe's face, who was keeping his eyes closed, smiling slightly, just enjoying that sweet touch. Sander liked to devote himself completely to his fiance, after making love. He knew that Robbe felt particularly vulnerable and he didn’t want him, in any way, to feel bad after doing something so beautiful together.

“Can I run you a bath?”

“It's not my birthday.”

“That’s why I’m not joining you.”

Robbe smiled, looking the other in the eyes. He took Sander’s face in his hands, drawing it closer to kiss his lips. He felt so blessed to be taken care of that way, even after seven years of relationship.

“C'mon, you’ll take a bath, I change the sheets and then I’ll deal with the birthday boy.”

“I love you so much.”

“Love you too.”

*

When he walked into the living room, he found Alice and Sander sitting on the sofa, while Hero was on the rug, playing with the box of the stuffed animal that Alice had just given him.

“Good morning, Alice!”

“Hey, sweetheart.”

“Dad!”

Hero smiled brightly, as he did every time he saw Robbe enter a room, and lifted the box he was playing with, to proudly show it to his dad. Sander and Alice laughed as Robbe went to sit on the rug next to the baby, making him sit on his lap.

“Happy birthday, baby boy.”

He hugged Hero in his arms and left a kiss in his blond hair. The boy showed him the box again and Robbe shook his head, letting out a chuckle.

“Wow, look at this box! It's so pretty, isn't it?”

“Sander was fascinated by wrapping paper when he was Hero’s age. He was such a weird kid.”

“Ma!”

Sander dramatically hid his face in a pillow, making everyone laugh, including Hero. He put the box aside and aimed his grabby hands towards his papa, calling him to get his attention.

“Can you walk to papa by yourself?”

Robbe helped Hero to stand and the child, staggering slightly, reached Sander, who immediately took him into his arms, kissing his cheek. Alice clapped her hands and approached her nephew to ruffle his hair.

A year ago, Hero had brought so much love into their family. Those who had chosen to welcome him and to see him grow had been rewarded with something ineffable. Robbe met Hero on his very first day on Earth, but he never imagined what he would become for him twelve months later. He didn’t believe, he could feel something stronger and more powerful than what he felt for Sander, but at that moment, he was looking at that little human being for whom he would have given his life without thinking, and he was sure that Sander would have done the same.

*

Hero's birthday party went great. Obviously, he didn't understand why all those people were around him, and he probably could remember less than ten of those, but the little one enjoyed being around adults, so he gladly joined the overall fuss.

Robbe's mom had also stopped by to say hello, although she left about an hour later. Robbe loved his mother, and his relationship with his father had become less tense after he grew up, but he often felt much more at ease with Sander's family than his own, so he couldn't wait to officially become part of it.

When Jens and Lucas arrived, Hero's face lit up, and he had spent most of the party glued to them.

*

As the guests began to leave, Robbe started to tidy up the living room, while Sander disappeared into the kitchen trying to give away some of the leftovers to the guests.

Robbe took a tray of mini sandwiches and headed for the kitchen, but stopped when he overheard his name being mentioned in a conversation that was taking place between his fiance and his cousin Olivia.

“You can't raise Hero with Robbe. He needs a mother, he needs a mother's touch. Two parents who can give him the best life.”

Robbe wasn’t surprised by the woman's words. He knew many people were of the same opinion. Two men can't raise a child and things like that. He had asked himself that question so many times before, but Hero was happy, growing up exactly like the other children, maybe even better than many of them because he had two parents who loved him, and he didn't care what gender they were.

He stayed there, waiting for his fiance‘s comeback.

“I agree with you.”

Sander's words hit him like a slap in the face. He hurried away, placing the tray on the first available surface, and went to lock himself in Hero's room.

The baby was laying asleep in his crib, with a peaceful expression on his face. Robbe picked him up, trying not to wake him, and sat down in the rocking chair, closing his eyes.

That baby was his son, but Sander had the power to take it away from him if he just wanted to. He felt like he was living a nightmare. They had talked about it so many times.

They planned to sign the adoption papers together, once they got married, as soon as Robbe turned 25. It was just a year away, but apparently, Sander had changed his mind. Now he could explain all the strange behaviors of his fiance. The reason he always kept his phone hidden. Since he'd noticed it while they were at the beach house, he couldn't help but observe the way Sander kept doing it even if he said that there was nothing to worry about.

But then again, Sander was so handsome that even if Noor hadn't been chosen to become Hero's mother, he'd only have to snap his fingers to find as many women as he wanted, willing to raise a child. Maybe Sander was tired of being with a man, or maybe he just realized he didn't want to raise Hero anymore and he would let Charlotte take him back.

All those thoughts seemed equally valid to him, and the conclusion was always the same. Robbe would end up giving up on his baby. Those were probably the last moments they spent together.

He felt his throat close and a sob escaping his lips and he began to cry, holding Hero in his arms.

*

Robbe didn't know how long it had been since he had taken shelter in the nursery, but the guests must have all left because there was no sound from the house. The chaos of thoughts in his head had made him lose track of time, even though the weight and heat of Hero on his chest had made him relax a bit.

Sander opened the door slowly and smiled, seeing Robbe and Hero together in the rocking chair.

“Hey, what are you doing here? I thought he was sleeping already.”

He approached his fiance to stroke his cheek, but the other turned his head quickly to avoid his hand.

“Don't touch me.”

“Robbe, what's wrong?”

“I wanna stay alone with him.”

Sander frowned, not understanding what was happening. The party had gone well and the last time he saw Robbe, he was happy. But at the moment his mood was completely different, and it didn't seem to be something generic. He just was angry with him.

“Can you tell me what’s happening?”

Robbe avoided his gaze, as the tears began to fall on his cheeks, and Sander wanted to hug him, comfort him in some way, but he decided to respect his fiance's request. He knelt in front of the rocking chair and looked at Robbe trying to understand what was going on.

“Robbe, please. It hurts me to see you like this.”

Still, no answer as the tears kept flowing silently. Robbe clutched Hero to his chest as if his life depended on him, and Sander was increasingly heartbroken. Maybe one of the guests had said something, or maybe Olivia herself had tried to make the same speech, she had started with him before Sander kicked her out. He wanted to talk about it but he knew Robbe and he probably wasn't ready to do it yet.

“Can you at least go to sleep in our bed? I'll get the couch.”

Sander closed his eyes, sighing and went to sit at the foot of Hero's crib, leaning his back against the bars. He could wait there in silence for Robbe to come back to him for all his life if he had to.

“I'll stay here on the floor, just tell me when you're ready to talk.”

*

“Do you think someone like Noor would be a better parent than me?”

It was late at night when Robbe's voice finally reached his ears, tired and distant as a mirage. He almost thought he had imagined it, but that conversation was too important to risk not answering. He sat up a little more straight. He tried to focus on the words he'd just heard, and when Noor's name came up again, Sander rubbed his temples.

He had often gotten his head stuck on a topic, but not like that, not after discussing it again, again, and again. Sander had tried in every way to reassure Robbe, to give him all his love, but apparently, it hadn't worked.

“What are you talking about, Robbe? And why you keep mentioning her?”

“You told your cousin that Hero needs a mother.”

“I- What?”

“I heard you saying that you agreed with her.”

It was Oliva and her stupid speech’s fault. That woman and her retrograde mindset would never set foot around his family again. He had sworn it to himself even before he knew Robbe was suffering like that.

“Are you kidding me, Robbe? I told her that I agreed with her, because of course Hero needs to be raised by someone who can love and take care of him in the best way, and that’s exactly what you and I are doing. I told her to fuck off!”

“Are you serious?”

“Yes, I'm deadly serious.”

Robbe blinked a couple of times, looking at his fiance. He suddenly felt more awake and stupid because he could have talked to Sander right away instead of bottling everything up while imagining hypothetical apocalyptic scenarios.

“I'm sorry. I don't know what's happening with me lately.”

Sander stood up, taking Hero from Robbe's arms, carrying him back to his crib. He covered him with his blanket and kissed his forehead. When he turned back, his fiance fell into his arms, and he smiled, running his fingers through his hair.

“I know what’s happening, and it’s my fault. Remember when I told you that I wasn’t texting anyone? I lied. I was texting Charlotte. I missed her, and I don’t know, I just did it.”

“Baby, why you didn't tell me?”

Robbe lifted his face starring at his fiance with those beautiful doe eyes. Sander brushed a lock of hair from his forehead and sighed.

“I was afraid you’d get upset. But there’s no need to. She has never started a conversation. It's like texting a stranger.”

“I'm sorry.”

Sander wrapped his arms around the other’s waist and hid his face against his neck. He kept making the same mistake, hiding things from Robbe fearing his reaction, and when in the end, forced by events, he had to tell him, he had always received understanding in return, feeling himself immediately better. Communication was everything, and he often tended to forget about it.

“We need to stop hiding things from each other. We’re getting married and we have Hero, who can feel if something is off between us.”

“And you need to stop deciding what’s best for me without asking, or I’ll get seriously mad next time.”

Sander nodded, without moving his head from Robbe's shoulder, swearing to himself that he would work on what was perhaps his worst flaw. He didn’t want to lose his fiance again, by making the same mistake once more.

“Can we go to bed now?”

“Yeah, my back is killing me and I can't wait to get some sleep.”

“Same. We're too old for this shit.”

They both laughed, but when in the darkness of the room, they heard Hero's voice calling them, both of them quickly understood that they probably wouldn't go to sleep as fast as they hoped.

[previous] / [next]

[xxgoblin-dumplingxx]

Cherry Coke Special: Twelve

Bucky looked up from his books and looked towards the door. Beyond the office, he can hear you talking to Nova as the pup follows you from room to room. You’re cleaning and tidying and making sure that everything is set to rights.

It would sound like home, even if it had only been two days since he moved you across the hall to his apartment. It was bigger. It had a better view. And honestly, he wanted you in his bed at night when he came home. And you agreed that you’d probably do better spending less time by yourself. And that it would make it easier to coordinate security for you.

It takes Bucky a moment to realize it when it happened. It’s been what feels like ages, but when you start singing to yourself, or to Nova, he isn’t sure which, he feels his heart skip a beat. You sang when you were happy, content. When you felt safe. And it had been months since he’d heard your voice. 

It wasn’t loud. It was even a little absent-minded. But it sounded like heaven. It had been so long since he’d heard you he’d almost forgotten what it felt like to listen to your voice like that. He stopped, staying completely still and sighed. He wanted to go out there and watch, but he didn’t want to startle you into stopping.

“Baby steps,” he murmured. But even with that in mind, it was satisfying to know that you were healing. And that Nova had done what he needed her to do. The little dog was steadily chafing the life back into you. Giving you someone to cuddle and fuss over. It wasn’t the same as the baby would have been, he knew. But it helped. It gave you a way to get going and get traction in the morning. And Bucky worried a lot less about coming home to find you dead of an accidental overdose.

Slowly, careful not to make too much noise, he stood and loped towards the door, leaning on the door frame and watching Nova sit at your feet, listening in rapt attention, lit head tilted sideways as she listened to you explaining how you were making dinner.

“Smells good, Princess,” he drawled, crossing the floor to kiss your cheek.

“Hopefully, Steve and Nat like it,” you murmur.

“They ain’t picky, baby,” he said, “They’ll just be thrilled to eat something that ain’t take out.” 

“That’s good,” you tell him, tucking yourself against his side. 

“I promise,” He murmurs, kissing the top of your head. “They ain’t had a home-cooked meal since ma stopped letting us meet in her Kitchen, I’m pretty sure.”

You snort, and he presses a little, “Speaking of Ma,” he said gently, “She misses you.”

“Why didn’t she just call me?” you ask patiently. You don’t have much patience for people, not just being direct about what they want.

Bucky stops and blinks at you for just a second. “I’ll tell her-” he started.

“No,” you say, waving your hand, dismissively, “I’ll call her tomorrow, and we’ll chat.”

Bucky chuckles and kisses your head again, “She’d like that,” he murmurs. 

“I meant to call her today, actually and got sidetracked when Mama called,” you tell him.

“What’d she want?” Bucky asked, frowning.

“Now that I’m not knocked up anymore, I’m allowed to come home,” you sigh.

“That-” Bucky growled, cutting himself off roughly, “Baby, that’s- why would she say that?”

“Probably because Rocky took over the bar and they’re running short,” you tell him practically.

“Are you gonna go back?” he asked. 

“Probably not to stay,” you tell him, “But I might pick up a weekend shift. I still have my license. And my savings are running low.”

Bucky frowned, “You mean to tell me I gave you a credit card, and you’ve been living off your savings anyway?”

“Yup,” you tell him, stirring a pot. 

“You little shit,” he said disbelievingly. 

You half shrug, “I’m not kept,” you tell him gently. “I’ll find a job soon. But I’m not gonna live off of you. That’s just... that’s gross. I appreciate your generosity, but you’re not my ATM.”

“Y/N,” he sighed, both touched and thoroughly exasperated. “You’re my girl. It’s my job to take care of you.��

“No,” you correct gently, “It is your job to love me. It’s not your job to buy things for me and let me lay around all day.”

“No,” he admitted, “Perhaps not. But I enjoy doing it. You’re a good girl. The best girl I ever had. And if you’re not ready to go back to work, you don’t have to. And you definitely don’t have to go home. Not if you don’t want to.”

“But I do,” you sigh, “The longer I sit at home, the more time I have to think.”

“Okay,” Bucky said, exhaling slowly. He didn’t want you working. He wanted you in a comfortable home filling your days with whatever activities a pretty girl did through the day when she was perfectly spoiled. But then, he had to admit. You weren’t that kind of girl. The kind that could lay around and eat brunch then tan and work out. And that wasn’t enough for you. You’d be unhappy lying around like that. “But I don’t want you going home to work for that woman,” he said sternly.

“But-” you start.

“I gave you a credit card, baby,” he reminded, “I wouldn’t have done it if I didn’t want you using it. Take yourself out tomorrow. Get your nails done, buy some new books... whatever you want, baby. You deserve it. Go do some pretty girl things.”

“New books would be nice,” you sigh. 

“There you go,” he said smiling softly, “Maybe take Nova to get some ice cream. She’d like that.”

“Would you like that?” you ask the dog, “Huh?” She barks and wags her tail. She has no idea what you’re saying, but she does know that you’re talking to her and she likes that. 

“I think that’s a yes,” Bucky hummed, stroking her ears until a knock on the door sends her running to bark at the door. 

Bucky pecks your cheek and goes to let Steve and Natasha in. 

“Something smells amazing,” Steve said, “And I’m starving.”

“Dinner’ll be ready soon,” you tell him, kissing his cheek and then Natasha’s as she takes a stack of plates from your hands.

“Ugh,” she groaned, “Finally there’s a girl with class around here. Can’t tell you how tired I am of plastic forks.”

“Dinner belongs on the table,” you say shrugging. 

“Exactly,” she agreed, slipping Nova a bite of cheese.

“Don’t feed her off the table, please. Treats are fine, just put them in her bowl... She’s gonna be a big girl. I’d prefer she not starts table surfing.”

Nat’s cheeks colored a little and she nodded. It wasn’t like you’d shouted. You hadn’t even been stern. But it was something about the way you hadn’t even looked up. It made her feel like a kid with her hand in a cookie jar. And damned if that wasn’t her least favorite mob wife trick. And she wondered where you’d learned it. 

[shannygoatgruff]

My Brother’s Keeper - Chapter XVI

Genre: Psychological Thriller

Modern Ivar X Modern Hvitserk

Rating: MA+18

Overall Warning:  Dark story told from an emotionally distributed person’s POV with graphic and sadistic material including rape, terror, torture, kidnapping, drug use, slash, implied incest, necrophilia, and insecurity. Heavy trigger warnings.  

Chapter Warning: Nervous breakdown. Mentions of a sexual assault. Violence. Murder. Captive/prisoner. 

A/N: A huge shout out to @xbellaxcarolinax​ for being my BETA. I edit this shit about a thousand times and I still find mistakes!  Thanks a million!

Chapter XVI

It's so cold in here. The kind of cold that goes through your bones and makes you stiff when you try to move. Father used to say that it's the kind of cold that gives you piles. I don't know what the fuck piles are but I wonder if there’s a chance I’ll get them. With my eyes still closed, I reach between my bed and the wall feeling for my fleece blanket. It’s just a matter of wedging my hand in between the corner just so…

I don’t know what the fuck my hand is rubbing against, but it damn sure isn’t my mattress. There shouldn’t be anything cold, hard, or rough in my bed and there isn't any wall that I can feel. Instantly, my eyes open, as my cheek scrapes something sharp.   

Where the fuck am I? Where ever this is, it’s dark, but there’s just enough light coming from somewhere that I can make out a few things; boxes, clothes… garden tools? What the hell - how did I get in the cabin? Only, this can’t be the cabin because it has wooden floors and I'm definitely lying on concrete.  

Am I…is this? I hold my breath and close my eyes again because it helps amplify sounds. If I’m where I think I am I’ll hear it right away. Please let me be anywhere but the basement. As soon as everything in me is still, I recognize the hum. Why didn’t I hear it before? It’s not like the dehumidifier is exactly quiet. Especially since it sits in the utility sink on top of a milk crate that’s a little smaller than it is wide so it’s weight isn’t distributed evenly. The stupid fucking thing makes noise when it rocks every time the motor shuts on and off.  

I can’t shake the feeling of panic washing over me as I sit in the dark, trying to figure out how in the fuck I ended up down here. I hate being in the basement, alone, no less. I could think of a hundred better places I’d rather sleep than here, so why did I think it was a good idea to just curl up and take a nap?

Unless…Shit. Did I blackout again? I couldn’t have, right? I haven’t in weeks although I’ve been struggling. I’ve been fighting tooth and nail to stay in the here and now dealing with things that are too much for me, taking them in little by little, so I don’t get overwhelmed. What happened to send me over the edge? 

My back contacts with something hard as soon as I sit up. It’s cold against my skin and makes me realize that I’m not wearing a shirt. As I reach my hand behind me, I don’t recognize the feeling…hard, space, hard. What is this? I’m too scared to turn around to see what it is I’m leaning against. And why does it smell like bleach down here? Did Ivar spill some while doing laundry or something? I vaguely remember him pouring the bottle all around, but did that really happen or just some shit that I'm making up? 

I should know why the smell of bleach is enough to choke me to death. How the fuck did I sleep down here with it? Trying to force myself to remember is making my palms sweaty and heart pound. I should be able to remember something as important as this. I don't even know how I know it's important, I just do.

Something’s not right – I can feel it in the pit of my stomach. I can’t stop my eyes from scanning the room nervously, trying to get a handle on what is going on.

Calm down - it’ll be alright. As long as I keep telling myself that, eventually, I’ll start to believe it. A few deep breaths in and hold, release slowly – Wait, I think I remember something. But, none of these flashes of memory make any sense.

There's no way in hell Ivar would have brought someone into our home. Just like I know that I would have fought the urge to give in; Aud cured me of that. That's why I'm sure that if I turn around I won’t be leaning against a cage and there won’t be anyone inside of it. 

I close my eyes and turn around until I'm kneeling in front of the object I was resting against. I can't help but say a silent prayer that I'm wrong about what I'm thinking. But, if there was a woman in a cage, I would be able to hear her breathing, or moving or something, right, or what if she's dead? Oh, God...

Holding my breath I open my eyes and they instantly fill with tears. "No!" My voice sounds like a whine from a small child. Did it happen the way that I remember it? Did I come down here with Ivar and we get in a fight after I had this Judith bitch? After Ivar went to bed I think I came back down for seconds - I just needed her again. I think I came back down here on my own and killed her.

The bars of the cage are cool against my forehead calming the sweat starting to form with the memories. I remember having her backed up against the bars and my hands around her waist all while she was still locked inside. Out of instinct, I grab my wrist at the thought. Unclutching my right hand from the left wrist, I see the bruise. 

I can still feel the metal against my waist as I fucked her. It was too scary to be in that cage with her, so I fucked her from outside of it. Being down here was bad enough, so instead of letting her out, or joining her, I had her get on her knees and I fucked her through the bars. Only this cage isn't that big, I could hear her head banging the metal bars each time I pushed into her. I peer into the cage just to check and there is blood caked on her face and matted in her hair. 

I fucked that woman to death.

I'm going to throw up. "Ivar?!" This is getting out of control. We used to have a plan, things were done in a certain order, and rules were never broken. Now we're just doing whatever the fuck we want. He's kidnapping people and bringing them here. We're partying at home. There's a dead woman in our fucking basement. "Ivar, I need help!” 

He's not answering me. Where is he? Finding my footing, I stand on weak legs before pulling my shorts up to my waist. I've got to find him. We've got to get rid of Judith and I need to get as far away from this house as possible.

I can do this. Quitting this life isn't that hard as long as there's no temptation. But as long as I’m with Ivar there will always be a temptation. "Ivar?" Calling out to him from the basement stairs doesn't bring him to me. If he won’t come to me, then I have to go to him. I don’t think I’ve ever needed him more in my life.

The bright sunlight fills the kitchen as I throw open the basement door. Squinting, I look around for the clock. It's after two in the afternoon. He’s got to be home, where the hell else would he be? The house looks like it always does like it's ready for guests to pop in unannounced. Nothing is out of place, not even the dishes from the snack we had last night. He always tidies up but this feels wrong. Things are a bit too clean. I can tell the difference from when he straightens and when he cleans. And Ivar only cleans when he's expecting someone. Who the hell would he invite over when we have a guest in the basement?

I vaguely hear his voice coming from upstairs, "Ivar?" I take the stairs two at a time, trying to get to him as quickly as possible. He's crossed the line. As good as he is there's no way he's going to be able to cover this up. It's my job to help him because he always helps me. I have to make him understand that we don't do it like this. The thrill, it's evolving. If I don't stop him, he's going to get caught. 

When I reach the top of the stairs, I notice his bedroom door is closed. Ivar’s door is never closed. Something is wrong, "Ivar, I need to talk to you.” I try the door handle but it's locked. I can hear him laugh and then the gasp of a voice that is distinctly female. 

I’m sure my brother hooks up occasionally, but he has never brought someone home. I seriously doubt that he can even have normal sex without it turning into something much, much more. So why would he do something like this – out in the open, in our home, and in his bedroom? That’s what the cabin is for. "Ivar, open the fucking door!" As I bang on the door, I hear Ivar’s laughter on the other side of the room.

"Hvitserk?" My heart stops beating in my chest at the sound of my name. I know that voice. I know the sound of those tears. This has to be a dream and I must still be asleep because there's no way that this is happening. "Hvitserk, I'm scared."

My mouth is so dry that I can hardly speak. I don't know what to do. Frantically, I try the knob and kick the door to get it open, "Thora? Thora baby, are you okay?"

"Oh, she's just fine, Serk." There's humor in Ivar's voice and then she screams. That's enough to make Ivar laugh, which normally sounds like music to me, but right now the sound gives me goosebumps. I don't know what he's doing, and I have never felt more helpless in all of my life. 

Pushing my weight against the door I try to break it down. It won't budge. The pain in my shoulder is evidence that when Ivar picked out these double insulated doors, he knew what he was doing, "Thora? Open the door, honey. I need you to open the door. Please?" I don't care if the neighbors hear me. Hopefully, they will and help me get her out of there.

"Hvitserk, why are you letting this happen? Help me!"

"He can't, because I won't let him in." Ivar's calm voice sounds like he’s closer to the door than he was before. As their voices move around the room, I can hear things falling and breaking. "He can't help you. Hvitserk's not here to save you anymore."

My tears match the sound of her screaming. There's nothing I can do to convince her to unlock the door. She’s too scared, I don’t blame her. I know what he can be like. The only way I’m going to get in there will be to plead with him. He wants me to be happy, so if I beg, then he’ll put his hatred for her aside for his love for me. He has to, "Ivar? Brother? Please, don't hurt her. Just open the door, Ivar…please."

"I'm not gonna hurt her, baby. Not, if she cooperates." He never changes from that calm tone of his. Even now with me begging him and Thora screaming, he's still in control. I have to admire that. "You love her – I just want to know why.” There’s a loud thud followed by a muffled yell, “I need to know what she has that makes you think being with her is better than partying with me. This bitch is going to show me. I want to know this pixie cunt’s secret."

My shoulder hurts, my knuckles are bleeding from pounding on the door. There's nothing I can do. Sliding down to rest with my back against the wall, I stare at the place that I can't get inside. "Ivar, you know I love you. And you know I love the life we have. But, it has to stop someday. The partying, the sex, the drugs, the killing…we can't go on like this forever. It's not her fault. It's mine. I just want a normal life." 

"Hvitserk, you're scaring me." The frantic sound of her voice is in response to what I just said. She doesn't know anything about my life outside of her and the tone in her voice says that she doesn't want to. But, I have to tell her. 

Maybe that was his goal all along; tell her all of the things I’ve done so that she’ll leave me on her own. "Torturing Thora won't change how I feel. Killing her isn't going stop me from wanting a normal life.” But if I beat him to it then maybe it won’t be so bad. Maybe she could forgive me, “I don't want to hurt people anymore, Ivar. I don't want to blackout again. Did you know that I raped and killed that woman downstairs and I didn't remember it until I saw her body? I can't live like this anymore."

"Hvitserk, stop it! I don’t want to hear anymore!” Thora's screams are turning my stomach. I hate the sound of screaming. I almost want to yell at her to shut up just so she can stop. “I want to go home. Just let me out of this room!"

But, Ivar's cool tone draws my attention back to him. "This is why she needs to go. She's convinced you that what we do is wrong. You've never raped anybody; you gave them what they wanted. And we don't kill people; we set them free. This bitch," glass breaks right before she screams again, "has got it all twisted up in your mind." 

"Why are you doing this?" I hear Thora ask the question at the same time I do.

"It's for you, Hvitserk.” I can hear the love and sincerity in his voice as he speaks. “I’m doing this for you.”

I feel a soothing hand stroke my cheek and my eyes open with a flutter. Why am I on the floor? "Ivar?" His face comes into view, but it's hazy. Those clear blue eyes are so soft looking down at me. He cradles me against his chest and rocks back and forth. "What happened?"

"Shh." He coos stroking my hair and kissing me softly on the head. "It's alright now."

Nodding in a groggy haze, I look up at him. There's blood on his cheek. "What happened to your face?" I'm still trying to piece together the last few minutes, hours, or days. Everything is a blank.

Pulling away from me, Ivar looks concerned. "It's over," His clothes are soaked in blood. His hair is matted to him with sweat. We’re in his room, but his appearance looks like we should be at the cabin.

"What's over?" I look around him and see a body lying in a pool of blood. A girl. A pretty girl judging from her naked body. I can feel myself harden at the sight of her. I can't see her face, there's too much blood. Apparently, he didn't like the way she looked because he slashed up her entire body, especially her face; he’s peeled it off. When Ivar doesn't like something, he removes it. Judging from the number of deep cuts he hated something about her. "Who's that?"

"It's Thora," His voice is soft and his grip on my face gets tighter when I try to move. He's trying to calm me, but I don't understand. "Hvitserk, baby, this was for the best. She was trying to hurt you. You needed protection so I put that bitch down."

Pushing him aside, I crawl over to her body and cover it with mine. Maybe if I can talk to her, she'll wake up. "Thora? Wake up. I'm gonna get you some help." If I can just wipe the blood from her face then maybe she could breathe. Using my shirt, I start to wipe, but I can't find her face. It's not there. I rub my cheek against the raw flesh of hers hoping like hell that she can feel me.

"It was her fault." Ivar's arms are around me again. He's lying on top of me, holding me while I cry. "She came here because you called her late last night. She was worried about you. You blacked out after Judith and I couldn't get you to come to. She didn't believe me when I said you were sick. She started looking for you. I couldn't let her find you with Judith. She wouldn't have understood. So I brought her up here to try to calm her down. But then she started saying things..." His voice gets harsher but he strokes my hair gently. "She started saying that I'm the one making you sick. That she saw the bruises and she knows what we do. She said if I didn't leave you alone, she was going to tell the police. She's followed us, Hvitserk. She knew about the cabin. That bitch knew a lot."

Thora? My Thora? She didn't know. She couldn't've. I never said anything, not even when she asked about the scars and what I did when I would be gone for weeks at a time. She was so innocent, how could she know? Maybe that's what she was always afraid of. I never knew what it was that had her so scared, but maybe it was what I did when I was with him. I don't know. There's too much to consider right now. But one thing is constant; Ivar never lies. "I don't understand."

"I had to protect you." The door opens with a bang and I don't know what to do. Ivar is pulled off of me and thrown against the wall. "I will always protect you." I can see his compassionate smile before I look back at Thora's bloody body. It had to have happened as Ivar said. He did this to protect me. 

A knee in the back of my neck pins me to the floor next to Thora and I’m forced to stare at her missing face. “Thora, baby?” My arms are yanked roughly behind me and my wrists are handcuffed together. By the time I’m pulled to my feet, Ivar isn’t in the room with me anymore. It’s just me, Thora, and about a dozen police officers. I guess they’ve taken him downstairs already.  

I happen to glance at myself in the mirror. My clothes are covered in blood, my hair is matted to my face with sweat and tears. My knuckles are bleeding and there is blood on my cheek. I look like Ivar did, covered in Thora's blood. I know what they think, but it doesn't matter. “Ivar!” I feel my knees buckling beneath me. 

Ivar's taken Thora away. They've taken Ivar away. It's all slipping away. It's growing hazy and fading to black… 

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