#i can and will make any and all of her songs about 911

[lover-of-mine]

You can't hurt me, any more than you have already...

[lowkeychenle]

Within the Piano Keys [ZCL] (M)

Description: For as long as you could remember, Chenle has been your neighbor and childhood best friend. That is, until one day he disappears without a word...or so you thought, since your mother hid all the letters he sent you.

Genre: Fluff/Angst/Smut triple threat ygm

Content Warnings: This fic contains letters from Chenle (purely fictional duh) but does mention things about the graduation system/the Dreamies going through a rough time just FYI! Just a brief mention. And also, smut. this has smut, but it's soft and cute smut because why not.......so literally that's it I think? Who I am these are some light content warnings

Word Count: 7,707

Pairing: Zhong Chenle x Reader (feat (briefly) Jeno & Jaemin, mentions of Mark and Jisung)

Juliet's Masterlist | Requests

Author's Note: This gif actually kills me someone send 911 emergency services sos zhong chenle is killing me AGAIN

The ghost of the past will always find you.

There’s no outrunning destiny. Who and what you were made to be. And you sure as hell love to try—pushing yourself to change as much as possible to keep Fate on her toes. Sometimes, it’s inevitable. Sometimes, people are placed on the Earth with a specific purpose, and you were sure yours was him. At a mere seven years old, your life changed forever—in a way you never saw coming. When you think about it, you don’t think Fate saw it, either.

Because you met him then.

You remember the day in vivid detail. The soft, sweet melody of the piano drifting through the house, up the stairs, and beneath your bedroom door where you stand, looking for your butterfly hair clip you adore oh so much.

When your frustration reaches its peak and you sit down with a huff on the edge of your bed, you hear it. Your heart seems to beat along with the music, every key pressed making you wonder just who is playing downstairs.

It’s from Phantom of the Opera, a song titled “All I Ask of You.” The melody is full, transcending your body into peace the moment you realize what it is.

After taking a deep breath, you hesitantly make your way down the winding, spiral staircase, fingers tracing along the railings as if they’re too delicate to actually hold on to. Your steps echo downward, but as the young boy comes into view, you stop.

Not even your noisy intrusion breaks him from his music-induced trance. His entire body moves along with the sound, his eyes closed as he presses each note with perfection. His black hair is a bit longer than it probably should be, with a middle part to expose his forehead. His defined brows are furrowed, and even at his age, you’ve never seen someone look wiser than this boy does right at this moment.

You feel the song in your bones, deep within your soul in such an existential way, you aren’t sure if you’ll ever feel anything like it again. A silly, juvenile thought. You don’t know it right now, but you’d feel like that every time you were around him.

As the song comes to a close, he holds out the last note, inhaling deeply as if he hasn’t been breathing the entire time.

His eyes flutter open, warm brown irises immediately meeting yours. You hadn’t expected such depth, but you’d learn eventually never to expect anything with him—in the end, you would only build yourself up to fall…over and over and over again.

Here you stand, locked in a metaphorical embrace with a kid who can’t be any older than you, yet he seems…different. Like he’s seen enough in his lifetime to age him beyond physicality.

That was the day you started to believe in fate. The day he left was when you stopped.

Hours turned into weeks, and before you know it, the boy next door became your friend. Most times, you’d sit on the bench while he plays piano and watch incredulously. His musical talent always astounds you—he can sing, play instruments, write songs and compose them.

Sometimes, he’d ask you to sing the songs he played, and even though you felt nowhere near as talented as him, you did what he wanted. He’d join in with you occasionally, your voices blending together seemingly effortlessly.

Those weeks turned into years—two kids learning more and more about each other. He’d become more than a friend. You were twelve years old when you realized the connection you had with Chenle. When everything pieced together, and you understood that some hearts, some souls, are much older than you could ever fathom. Your heart, you were sure, stretched beyond your years, and your soul was kindred with Chenle’s in a way that could only mean you’d known each other in a past life. Slowly, slowly, slowly…he was everything, all at once.

“You’ve almost got it,” he whispered to you, adjusting your ring finger on the keys. “Just gotta move over a little bit more.”

You pouted. “My hands aren’t big enough, Lele.”

“Stop that.” He chuckled, shaking his head and nudging your shoulder. “That mindset is gonna keep you from learning.”

“Well, if my mindset doesn’t do it, the arthritis at a young age will,” you snipped.

His eyes sparkled with humor, crinkling at the edges as his smile widened. “You’ll get it eventually. Keep trying.”

“What if I don’t?”

“Then I’ll tell you that you suck and you should never play again.”

You snorted. “Promise?”

He held up his pinky. “I’d never lie to you.”

You looped yours with his.

“You’ll get it.”

Chenle never gave up on you. He kept pushing you to be the best you could be, and you gladly followed his direction. You never quite got as good as he was with the piano, but you’d gotten decent at least. The two of you would hang out every day, spending every waking, free moment together until your mom told him it was time to go home.

You’d never thought about love and what it meant. For you, loving Chenle was as natural as breathing, and as time went on, it only got easier.

You turned fourteen before Chenle. If you had known this was the beginning of your last year with him, you would’ve appreciated it more. You would’ve told him all of the things lingering on your mind—how you loved him, so purely and genuinely.

Just days before your life blew up in your face, you almost told him.

He sat next to you on your bed, arm wrapped around you as you rested your head on his shoulder. The soft golden light of the lamp illuminated him gently, and the movie playing in the background edges you closer and closer to sleep.

“Do you ever think about…life?” he asked.

“Hm?” You scrunched your nose, your half-asleep state not registering what he meant.

“Like…what your plans are. What you want to do and who you want to be with.” His thumb brushed your skin soothingly. “We have to figure it out soon, don’t we? We’re almost adults.”

“You’re not tired?” You sat up and rubbed your forehead.

“Nope.”

“Well.” You sighed and ran your fingers through your hair. “The only thing I’m certain about when it comes to the future is that you’ll be there. So, it doesn’t matter what else happens.”

He smiled softly, the slightest shade of red tinting his cheeks. “Even if the world ended?”

“Even if the world ended.” You confirmed.

A few months later, the world did end. At least, yours did.

He was gone.

His mom left shortly after him, but she told you what he was doing—how he was going to pursue his music career in South Korea. He was going to be an idol, and he was leaving you behind to do it.

Your world ended, but his got to go on without you.

At twenty-one years old, you’re still not sure where you went wrong. Chenle left, but his memory plagues the very walls you live within. You keep up with him, with his group and all of the things they’re doing. Even though you’re not with him, you watch him grow and grow into a more confident version of the young boy you knew.

Seven years without him should have been impossible, yet here you are: alive, well, and watching any and all Chenle related content. You haven’t heard from him, not once. Assumingly, he’s incredibly busy. Even then, you wonder occasionally if you ever cross his mind, if he ever thinks of the love he left behind.

Ever since, you’ve been sensitive over the summer months. A part of you is missing, and until you see him again, you’re unsure if you’ll ever find it. Has he changed? Is he still the boy you loved?

On days where thoughts of him overwhelms you, you like to walk the trail behind your house. It takes you through a wooded area, and the other end brings you to the end of your street. On your walk back, you see an unfamiliar car outside of Chenle’s family’s home. Curiosity gets the better of you, and you stand there to watch.

The door slides open, and you hear an unfamiliar laugh. Frowning, you cross your arms over your chest. Who the hell would be at Chenle’s house?

When the first person gets out of the car, your heart stops in your chest. You’re about eighty percent sure that’s Lee Jeno, light hair reflecting the bright sunlight above. If that’s Jeno, then—

You feel a sudden urge to run into your house, slam the door, and lock it behind you. Several other people are in that car, and if they’re here…one of them is Chenle. Your Chenle, who isn’t really yours. Not anymore.

Jaemin gets out next. His roots are dark, nearly overshadowing the pink hue on top of his head. He swats at someone behind him, laughing, and as that person comes into view, your heart stops. It shreds itself to pieces.

Jeno notices you first, a slight frown gracing his face before Chenle’s gaze follows his line of sight. When he sees you, you instantly see the recognition on his face.

Seven years is a long time. Hell, even though you’ve seen all of Dream’s content, you’re still shocked to see how different he looks. His face is more defined. He’s grown a bit taller, too.

He sees you. He’s looking at you for the first time in years, and all you want to do is forget all this time of no contact, all the ways the two of you hadn’t reached out to each other. A lump forms in your throat, and before you do something stupid, you let out a shaky breath, turn away from him, and make your way into your house.

You shut the door behind you, your back thudding against it. Glancing over to your right, the grand piano—old and loved—is blurred by your tears, and for the briefest of moments, you swear you see your younger self sitting there, endlessly playing the songs Chenle taught you before he left.

A knock sounds, and each one echoes throughout your house, feeling like a hole-puncher on your heart. You’re barely able to breathe as you prepare yourself to be face-to-face with Chenle for the first time in almost a decade—for the first time since he up and disappeared on you without a word.

“(Y/N)?” His voice. So familiar but so distant, all the same as it was.

You don’t answer. You can’t.

“I’m coming in, okay?”

You brace yourself against the solid wood of the piano, doing your best to calm yourself. The last thing you need is to make a fool of yourself in front of him.

A hesitant creak fills your ears, and the tap of his shoes on the hardwood flooring has your eyes clenching shut.

“Why’d you run off like that?” he asks, voice so soft that it’s barely audible.

“I didn’t.”

“You still sound the same,” he says it quietly, as if he’s the only one meant to hear it. He raises his voice so you can hear him. “It’s been a long time.”

You scoff, whipping around to face him. “It’s been a long time? That’s all you have to say to me?” Anger bubbles in your gut, quickly replacing the hurt lingering.

You have to stop yourself from admiring him at a time like this. His oversized T-shirt somehow compliments him in the best ways, his hair is a tinted shade of purple, and when his fingers run through it, you have to look away. Sure, you should’ve expected to see him again at some point, but you never imagined you’d feel the same. It’s a bit different now that you’re older. You’re able to see him in a different light.

His eyes widen and he recoils. “I…I’m sorry, I don’t know what else I’m supposed to say. It’s not like there’s a textbook on how to do this.”

“What are you doing here? Why now?” You cross your arms over your chest, doing your best to avoid his eyes.

“We’re here on a schedule.” He slides his hands into the pockets of his sweatpants. “I told them about you, in case you were wondering.”

“Oh, right.” You let out a sarcastic laugh. “I suppose that makes it all okay, right? You tell your friends I exist and that’s supposed to change how you up and left me without a word?”

He frowns. “Without a word?”

“Yeah, Chenle. Without a single fucking word.”

“That’s not true.” His tone sharpens to match yours. “I wrote to you. A lot. And if you didn’t want to read them, that’s on you. That doesn’t mean I left without a word. There were a lot of words, actually.”

“Why didn’t I get them?” Your voice drops into a whisper, moving one of your hands to touch your forehead.

“I…I don’t know. I didn’t know your address so I sent them to my mom, and she told me every time she gave one to your mom—”

A jolt of electricity rages up your spine, and you immediately turn away from him and run up the staircase. Your mother’s out of town for the week. If she’s been hiding letters from you, they’d be in her room somewhere—and you’d tear that place apart if it meant you had all those words.

“Where are you—hey!”

You’re already in your mom’s closet when Chenle follows you in.

“You shouldn’t be in here—”

“Says you,” you interrupt him, mindlessly shuffling through anything that looks like it could hold letters. “How many?”

“What?”

“How many did you send, Chenle?”

“Um.” He pauses, shifting on his feet. “I don’t know. A few? I stopped after a while because I didn’t hear anything. Figured you didn’t want anything else.”

“My God,” you mutter, blinking rapidly to fight off the tears. “And you swear your mom gave them to mine?”

“I—yeah, she didn’t have a reason not to.”

“And my mom had a reason not to give them to—shit. When did you send the first one?”

“(Y/N), it was seven years ago.”

“Was it right when you left or afterward?” You haphazardly dig through the closet, searching high and low.

“I left it here. I told my mom about it after a week or so. What the hell is going on?” Chenle runs his fingers through his hair again, gulping. “We really shouldn’t be in here.”

Your heart sinks. There’s nothing in here. You’ll never find Chenle’s letters, and the mystery will always be just that.

“I…I’m so sorry.” You drop your head into your hands. “I’m acting like an idiot right now.”

“Don’t be sorry, I’m just confused. This whole time, I thought you didn’t want anything to do with me…that’s why I haven’t been back in a while.” Chenle takes a step closer to you, reaching out to touch your arm. “I would never leave you.”

You finally look at him. Really look at him. The worried furrow to his brow, the slight downturn of his lips, concern clouding those beautiful irises of his. Standing in front of you is the reason you are who you are today.

“You just…Okay, I need a while to figure all of this out.” You glance up to the ceiling, closing your eyes and taking a shuddering breath. “Can you go? I don’t really want to see you right now.”

Hurt plays out on his face, but after he blinks a few times, he nods slowly. “Yeah. Sure. Um, I’ll see you later. If it helps any, I probably could’ve tried to call or something.”

“We were kids.” You sigh. “It wouldn’t have changed anything.”

You say that, but it would have. The entire trajectory of your life may have changed if Chenle was still in it back then. As much as you want to be pissed at your mother for hiding things from you, maybe she was right.

Chenle takes his bottom lip between his teeth, looking you over one more time as he nods. “Right. I…I’ll see you around.”

Before you respond, he’s turning away from you and disappearing down the hall. You feel a lot of things—overwhelmed, confused, sad. But you also almost feel naive for listening to him—for believing that your mother hid things from you. Your brain stops being logical when Chenle’s around, and you know it’s a mistake to bring him back into your life. The hurt has passed, but that doesn’t mean it won’t rear its ugly head if you’re in such close proximity to him.

You go back downstairs to grab your phone, and the first thing you do is dial your mom’s number. She picks up after the first ring.

“Hi, honey! I was about to text you. New York is fascinating! You’d love it—”

“Did Chenle write me letters?”

“Oh.” She clears her throat. “Where is this coming from?”

“He’s here,” you mutter. “He told me he sent me letters, mom.”

“(Y/N), you have to understand where I was coming from.”

“Where are they?” You slap your hand to your forehead. “Where?”

“He still left, you know. I understand he’s important to you, but he still chose a career over you. And you would’ve thrown everything away for him without a second thought.” Your mom takes a deep breath. “You needed to live your life for you.”

“Where are they?” you repeat. “If you threw them away, I will never forgive you.”

“Of course, I didn’t throw them away. They’re in my closet in a little gold box on the floor. When you read those…don’t get any ideas. He lives far away and he’s even less available for you now than he was before.”

You hang up without saying another word and run back up the stairs. It takes you only a few seconds to find the box she told you about. When you open it, your breath shudders at the stack of letters in there. Some are aged and crinkly, but the ones toward the top are newer. Your hands shake as you grab them, mouth dry as you see the dates listed across the front of the envelope.

You start with the one on the bottom, the oldest, and ever so carefully opening it. Blinking back tears, you take in the painfully familiar handwriting that belonged to your Chenle.

(Y/N)

This is probably the worst way to do this, I know. I’m leaving to follow my dreams, and while I wish I could take you with me, it doesn’t make sense. Your mom would never agree to let you come. Thinking of going through all of this without you scares me more than I care to admit.

I don’t have a phone yet, but as soon as I get one, I’ll send you a letter with the number! It’ll be nice to hear your voice again. I’m writing this early, so I actually spoke with you earlier today, but it’s funny how quickly I miss you.

You’re probably going to be really mad at me, and that’s okay. I deserve it. The reason I didn’t tell you isn’t very simple, but I hope you understand it. Saying goodbye to you would feel so permanent. Goodbye itself is too permanent for my liking, so I’ve never liked them.

If I looked into your eyes and told you I was leaving, I was scared that I wouldn’t be able to go. Or that I’d sneak you with me in my carry-on. I didn’t want to hurt you. You mean so much to me, (Y/N). I don’t ever want to make you upset, and I know you’ll eventually understand why I had to do it this way.

Just know I’ll be thinking about you every day. You’re the reason I’ll have the strength to get through this training period.

Talk to you soon,

Your Chenle

You trace your finger along the bottom of the page. Face wet, you clear your throat as you delicately set it aside to grab the next one. According to the date on the envelope, it’s from a few months after the first one.

(Y/N),

These past few months have been so hectic. I think I almost died a couple times, but here I am. I debuted last week! I’m in a group called NCT, but I debuted in the sub-unit NCT DREAM. It seems surreal, and it happened so much faster than I thought.

I think you’d like the other guys. They’re nice and loud and friendly. Honestly, they seem like they’ve been working together for a little bit of time already, so I’m the newest one here. I heard someone say they’d been training for a while…

Anyway, I said in the last letter that I’d give you my phone number. I realized after I left that you didn’t have one either, so…I’m not sure how that’ll work. And I wasn’t expecting a response to these at all, but if you want to write back, it’d give me something to look forward to after all this hecticness.

But yeah…honestly, I was a bit worried about moving here and being in a group. I’ve been learning a lot of Korean though, and another member named Jisung has been helping me a lot. He’s a few months younger than me, can you believe it? Everyone treats him like a baby, but I think he likes it. I told them about you, and they all kept teasing me.

Maybe they just don’t understand. You’re my favorite person, of course, I’m going to talk about you and tell them stories about all the fun we had.

Sorry this one is a bit long. I hope you’re not too mad at me. And I also hope that you’re keeping up on me. I think you’d like Chewing Gum…

I’ll talk to you soon! I’ll write my number down at the bottom of the page.

Your Chenle

You have to take a break. You rest your head back against the wall, closing your eyes and imagining how hurt poor, young Chenle must have been when you never responded to his heartfelt letters. You don’t know much about Jisung—besides the obvious, public information—but you’re happy someone was good and helpful to him.

After that, you wonder what it would’ve been like to be there for him through all of that. Based on what you know about his group, he’s been through a lot of ups and downs over the years. You wonder if he wrote about some of the harder things, too.

You read another one that’s about their promotions, how he’s getting closer with the other members. Then one about how he performed with twenty-two others. The next one you grab is dated from 2019. You open it.

(Y/N),

I didn’t think this year would be as hard as it has been. We all expected it, you know? We knew it was going to happen, but it doesn’t change how scary it’s been. I’m sorry it’s been a while since I’ve written. Maybe you just throw them away at this point, which is fine, but I wish I could hear from you. Especially at a time like this.

Dream has a graduation system, and Mark’s been gone for months now. Things have been continuing ‘as normal,’ but without Mark, we don’t really feel complete as a group. We see him as often as we can, but performing without him is…it feels wrong.

I wish I could see you. You’d make everything better in an instant, just like you always did. Sometimes, I feel terrible because the others get sad about the situation, and I can’t figure out any good words to say. You’ve always been so good at comforting others, I wish you were here to help me.

It’s been two years since I’ve seen you. That’s so weird to think about, because I swear I still hear your voice in my head. Your encouraging words, how you always believed in me. I need that now more than ever.

I’m not sure if you know much about Mark, but he’s our rock. We kind of fail to function without him. But in the spirit of missing both you and Mark, I’ll tell you a little story about what happened when I asked Mark for advice.

I asked him about you—about what I could possibly do to make all of this up to you since you deserve it. And not hearing back from you makes me think you might hate me.

Anyway, his question in response was interesting. He wanted to know what you were to me. How I felt about you. At first, I thought he was crazy. I mean, it was obvious—you’re my best friend. I can’t live and function without my best friend.

He asked if that was all.

I vividly remember scrunching up my face and pushing his shoulder. Not too hard, by the way.

But the more he told me about what it felt like to be in love, everything clicked into place. I’m in love with you, (Y/N). I have been for so long that it started feeling like second nature instead of a conscious idea.

I guess it doesn’t matter now. Maybe I’ve failed you too much for it to mean anything to you.

Loss sucks. Losing Mark in Dream has sucked, losing you before I even realized the extent of my feelings sucked, but at the end of the day, I have to keep pushing forward. I’m sorry for any hurt I may have caused, because this situation with Mark also made me realize how much it must have hurt you for me to up and disappear the way I did.

I’m so, so sorry. I hope you can forgive me.

Your Chenle

You wipe angrily at your tears, unsure if you should be mad at yourself or at your mother. She stole this from you. Chenle figured out his feelings for you long before you figured out yours for him, but it feels like a new revelation—to know he felt the same way, even after years without you.

You remember this time where Mark had ‘graduated’ from NCT Dream. And because you knew Chenle well, you could tell he was struggling, even when he put on a happy facade. He needed you, and you weren’t there for him.

No matter how much it hurts, you can’t stop. You grab the next one. His writing became less frequent after that. He wrote to tell you when NCT Dream became a fixed unit, and how happy he was to be reunited as seven. The next was from their first full album. You find the last one, surprised to find how recent it was. There was a large gap between this one and the one before it.

The letter was addressed from a few months ago. The one before had been from two years ago.

(Y/N),

I’m sorry it’s been a while. Honestly, we’ve been so busy, I’ve barely even had the time to sleep. I got news today that we’ll be going to China for an event. I’m coming home, but I figured I should tell you in advance. Give you some time in case you really don’t want to see me.

I still think of you every day. All I want is to hear your voice again, but I won’t ask you to do something you don’t want to. If you have no intention of seeing me, that’s fine. I know I messed this up, but I figured it wouldn’t be right to give up when I’ll be so close.

We’ll be arriving in the next few weeks. I wish I could give you more detailed information, but I won’t even know it until the day of.

If this is it for us, thank you for the time I had with you. I love you, (Y/N). No matter what, that’ll be true, but this will be the last thing I send. I hope you understand.

Love,

Your Chenle

At this point, you’re bawling your eyes out. You aggressively wipe away the tears, cursing yourself for not knowing about these damn letters. All the pain you could’ve helped him through, all the hurt it could’ve saved you from.

You sniffle, grab your phone, and dial the number at the bottom of the second letter. It’s been years since he gave it to you, so there’s a good chance it’s different now. But you don’t exactly feel like going over to his house while his friends are there and making a fool of yourself.

“Hello?” That’s definitely his voice.

“Chenle,” you breathe out, closing your eyes. “My Chenle.”

“Yeah.” His tone softens. “Yeah, yours. Always yours.”

Running your fingers through your hair, you sigh. “I found them. All of them. I’m so fucking sorry.”

“You have nothing to be sorry for,” he says. “It’s not like you even knew about them. Give me one second, I’m gonna go upstairs. Jeno and Jaemin are still here.”

You nod even though he can’t see you, and you hear him say something to the other guys. They reply, and then you hear the tell-tale sound of the stairs creaking beneath Chenle’s feet. Once he makes it up to his bedroom, he closes the door behind him.

“Are you okay?” he asks. “That’s a lot to read all at once.”

“I don’t know. I’m so mad, Lele. How could she hide those from me? If I’d known you didn’t just leave me, it would’ve hurt so much less. And seeing all this pain you went through all by yourself…I’m so sorry.”

“Stop apologizing,” he tells you. “We know the truth now. I don’t want you to hate me.”

“I could never hate you,” you whisper, burying your head in your palm. “Not even if I tried.”

There’s a brief silence, only filled with the sounds of you sniffling and Chenle breathing. He’s right next door, but the idea of being with him is too real. You need time to process all of this, and bringing him around while you do isn’t the best idea.

“You said you loved me.”

“Love,” he corrects you. “Present tense. I never stopped.”

“I kept up with you.” You play with the seam of your jeans. “With everything you did with Dream and all the accomplishments you’ve had so far. I’ve been so proud of you with no way to say it.”

“I almost stopped writing letters. Mark convinced me not to give up, but after seven years I was pretty sure you wouldn’t change your mind,” he admits.

“If I’d been receiving them I would’ve called you the second you gave me your number.”

“That’s what I’d been hoping for.” Chenle takes a deep breath. “We have to go soon for a schedule, but can I come see you later?”

Later wasn’t really definitive. The thought of him in your house and in your space is scary, terrifying even, but this is Chenle. The boy who used to play piano with you and sing to his heart’s content. From what you’ve seen, this version of him doesn’t seem too different than that boy.

“Please,” you whisper. “Will you be hungry? I can make you something.”

“It’ll be late. Don’t worry about me. I’ll see you soon, okay?”

Not too long after your conversation, you hear the three boys clamber into the van. You try to busy yourself throughout the day, cleaning in order to distract yourself. Eventually, you sit down at the piano and play whatever song comes to memory. One of the ones Chenle taught you back when he was here.

You taught yourself a few of Dream’s songs as well, like Rainbow, My Youth, Puzzle Piece, Teddy Bear, and most recently, Like We Just Met from their newest album. You play the last one, the darkness cascading around you as the sunset fades away from view. It’s only you and the starlight now, a gentle melody flooding through the air around you.

The door creaks open, and Chenle walks through when you’re almost done with the song. You stop playing, standing up to greet him. There’s an odd moment where you stand there staring at each other, admiring the way the starlight reflects off his skin. His eyebrows are furrowed, like he’s trying to decide what to do next.

You don’t hesitate anymore. Moving forward, you wrap your arms around him and bury your head in his chest. He immediately reciprocates, shaky breath passing by his lips as he holds you closely. His heart thrashes, the sound more than similar to yours.

“I missed you,” he says.

“I missed you, too,” you reply easily, tightening your grip on him.

You pull back slightly to look into his eyes, wetness gathered beneath them. With shaky hands, you reach up to wipe it away. His gaze travels over your face.

“You love me.”

He nods hesitantly, palms pressing into the small of your back. “Always have.”

“I’ve always loved you, too.” Before you talk yourself out of it, you’re on the tips of your toes to kiss him. It starts gently, your mouth barely brushing his before his breath catches in his throat. Then it’s real—he pulls you flush against him, lips fitting with yours like he’s made for you.

You move your hands from his cheeks to his hair, leaning into him. His fingers latch onto the fabric of your shirt. Next thing you know, he’s walking you backward until he’s pressing your back into a wall.

“We have so much to talk about.” He rests his forehead on yours. “So much air to clear up.”

“Yeah.” You nod, but your stare is focused directly on his lips.

“This isn’t going to be easy,” he warns you. “I don’t get to come here often, so unless you were to come to Korea, we’d pretty much never see each other. My schedules are so packed, I’m practicing all day and half-dead by the time I get home. I can be a real asshole when I’m tired, and sometimes I might take jokes too far. This life is not easy, (Y/N). I need you to know what you’re getting yourself into.”

“What am I even doing here?” you ask. “I can come with you.”

“I can’t ask you to give up everything you have for me.” He shakes his head, tucking your hair behind your ear.

“You’re not asking. Chenle, I spent years thinking you were gone without a word. All I want is to be with you as much as possible.”

“At least think about it for a little bit first, okay? I don’t want you to do anything you’ll regret.” He gulps. “That goes for a lot of things.”

“I’ve had seven years to think about all the things I wanted from you.”

“You can’t say things like that,” he mutters.

You’re painfully aware of what it feels like to have him pressed against you, warm in all the right ways and, despite being so thin, he’s firm to the touch. The ache you feel to be closer to him is overwhelming.

“I spent years thinking everything was a lie,” you tell him. “That I couldn’t possibly have mattered to you if you could just disappear without a word.”

His fingers play with yours, discomfort at the idea plastered across his face. “Never. I never would’ve done that. You’ve always meant so much to me.”

“I’m just happy I finally get to tell you all of the things I wanted to tell you after I found out you were gone.” You give him the smallest smile, and he reaches up to trace along your bottom lip.

The simple touch sends sparks flying down your spine, and you’re sure you’ll crumble to dust right at his feet from the forceful impact of it. An odd tug occurs in your chest, one that has you questioning if you’ve ever experienced it before. It pulls you toward him, and despite being flush, your mind dips to dangerous places that could get you so, so much closer.

You’re not sure what’s gotten into you, but this is Chenle. Your Chenle. And if you’re having these feelings for him, there’s no need to hide it.

“I…” you trail off, clenching onto the fabric of his shirt, right above his heart. “Do you feel it, too? Everything is…different now.”

“Under other circumstances, I’d say different is bad,” he whispers. “But there’s nothing bad about the way you’re looking at me.” 

His arms wrap around your waist tightly, and simultaneously, you both lean in until your lips are locked in a gentle battle. The warmth of his touch finds your hip, where your sweater rose up enough to reveal your skin. You let out a shaky sigh, and he squeezes you.

“Come upstairs with me?” Your invite is airy, suggestive, and he analyzes you while his gaze darkens.

“If that’s what you want,” he says.

“Is it what you want?” You tilt your head at him, voice quiet since he’s so close.

He pauses and wets his lips. “Of course, it is. I just don’t want you to regret anything. Losing you once was enough, and I refuse to go through that again.”

 Instead of answering, you intertwine your fingers with his and lead him toward the stairs, through the blackness of the night casting through the windows. You take one step at a time, your heart thundering and blood pulsing through your veins. One look at your shoulder, and for a second, you almost swear you see the younger versions of you and Chenle sitting by the piano. Caught up in the music. In each other.

He follows you, entranced by the way you move and how you’re so willingly guiding him. Everything happens in slow motion for you. Too fast but too slow at the same time, somehow the moment you’ve waited for your entire life while simultaneously the thing that’s scared you the most.

Your Chenle.

He said it himself. Why is it so foreign to think about? That maybe, even after all this time, he loves you even an ounce of how much you love him? Endless devotion with no contact. But he did the same—he waited and waited for your response much like you waited for any contact from him. You were both physically and metaphorically in the dark.

The door to your bedroom creaks as you push it open, embarrassed by how little it’s changed since the last time he was in it. The walls are still the same color, faded and paint peeling in some of the corners. Your bed has been swapped from twin-sized to a queen, but everything else is virtually untouched.

No more words are spoken.

They’re not needed.

You don’t need anything. Not when you have him.

He presses your body into the mattress, climbing over you gently. His touch is tender, sweet, not too much pressure. You’re halfway certain you’ll wake up from this dream any time now, and you’ll once again be without him. Without his touch and his love and his truths.

Kissing him is like touching the sun. It burns, nearly enough to make you combust into flames, but magnetic. He is your sun, and you are the Earth. You revolve around him.

Normally, anyone else taking your clothes off would make you nervous, but you know you’re in good hands with Chenle. Your shirt is tossed aside first, his mouth instantly dipping down to explore every inch of exposed skin. His tongue drags along the swells of your breasts, over your collarbones. He nips, teeth leaving shallow indents on your soft flesh.

Your whines are soft, delicately slicing into the silence of the air. The first time he hears you, he freezes, his eyelashes fluttering against your neck as he takes in the way you sound. Quiet cries of ‘more’ escape you while your hands explore beneath his T-shirt.

Never before in your life have you wanted someone with such despracy. Your body aches for him, and the tug in your chest that pulled you closer to him has finally revealed how. As his fingers pop the button on your jeans, you lift your hips.

He pulls his lips away from your chest, gaze honing in on yours. There’s something swirling around in his irises, and you’re sure yours reflect the same. He doesn’t have to ask the question on the tip of his tongue. Not verbally. You nod, guiding his mouth back to yours.

The heat of his touch dips dangerously low, past your jeans and the hem of your panties. You gasp, appreciative of how he catches the sound. You’ve been touched before, but nobody has ever compared to the way he feels. When you’ve met your soulmate, nothing could be better.

He rubs slow circles on your clit, eyes hazy from knowing he’s the one who made you feel this way. Normally, you’d need more. A simple touch wouldn’t be enough to have you squirming in someone’s grasp, but there’s so much more behind his movements than lust.

And he takes it a step further, sliding his long fingers inside you. His gaze focuses on you the whole time, watching your face for any sign of discomfort as he thrusts his hand. He nudges your sensitive bud with the heel of his palm every time he’s knuckle deep.

Your stomach feels elastic, as if you’re stretching a rubber band, and it’s taking everything you have not to let it snap back. It’s too good. Too intoxicating. Too early for it to be over. He swallows your short moans, picking up his pace. You lean up, yearning for his kiss. He doesn’t need to ask, and the second your lips meet, you tighten around him, and it’s over.

Warmth spreads all over your body, your insides boil, and butterflies swarm deep in your stomach. Your eyes shut, and your head falls back against your pillow. He kisses all over your face, humming quietly.

He pulls away from you to help you remove the last of your clothing, the fabric of your panties sticking uncomfortably until he tugs them down your legs.

You reach down to feel him through his pants, unable to stop the shuddering breath that escapes you when you touch his length. He grinds into your hand, taking his bottom lip between his teeth.

Finally, nothing separates the two of you anymore. The tip of his cock presses against your entrance, the initial pressure already making you crave more. You need all of him, so you wrap your legs around his waist and dig your heels into his back to tell him to push in further. Your whole body tingles with pleasure, the type enough to make your toes curl, and your chest heaves as you adjust to his size.

His forehead drops against your shoulder, grasping one of your hands in his own to squeeze. He takes you slowly, his throbbing length stretching you to your limits and rubbing your walls perfectly. You were made for him, you’re certain. He fits so well, so completely, there’s no other explanation for it.

He curses under his breath, eyes threatening to flutter shut from the pleasure. Sweat clings to you tighter than Chenle does, but you relish in the way you react to him. His eyebrows pinch as he looks at you for any sign of discomfort.

His name slips past your lips. In that moment, you truly become his, and he becomes yours. Bodies meld together, each one of his thrusts sliding so pleasantly inside you. There’s no sound from either of you besides the brief exchange of names, moans from both of you, and the slick of your wetness.

He kisses you, thrusting at a steady, mind-crumbling pace. His chest brushes against yours, breathing uneven as he clenches the bedsheets next to your head. You quickly realize you could do this forever. The feeling of him so deep inside you would never subside, and you find yourself never wanting to separate from him.

Starlight gleams off his skin, the blue shine accenting the sheen of sweat clinging to him. His muscles contract as he holds himself over you, and his hair hangs over his eyes. All you can do in your current state is push it back, basking in the softness of it.

Picking up his pace, he slides one of his hands down your body, his thumb connecting with your clit. You’re a moaning mess, clinging to him as the familiar sensation returns to the pit of your stomach.

His trembling breath fans across your ear as he leans close. You’re unsure of how to handle all of the pleasure, your body spasming. He presses a kiss on that sensitive spot.

“I love you,” he whispers.

And that’s all it takes to have you shatter around him, your back arching as you grip onto his shoulders for dear life. He moans loudly, hips stuttering as your walls clench. When he spills inside you, it’s as if the last piece of you two finally comes together.

In bliss, you tell him you love him, too, over and over.

He kisses you passionately once more before gently pulling out of you, reassuring you that he’ll be right back so you let go. Grabbing a towel from your bathroom, he cleans you up, gaze drinking up every part of you. Once he’s finished, he crawls next to you in bed, pulling you to his chest.

You’re still certain you’ll wake up, and all of this will have been a dream, but until then, you’re going to enjoy it. Burying yourself in the warmth of his chest, you hum in content when he pulls the blankets over the two of you.

Finally, he’s here.

He’s no longer a memory trapped within the piano keys in your foyer.

He’s your Chenle, never to leave your side again.

[wangxianficfinder]

Fic Finder

May 22nd

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1. Wanting to find a modern AU. The one scene I recall was in a parking lot, I think: the Jiangs are confronting WY, who had been at a party with LZ, possibly in order to see JYL. JC finds out about the sacrifice WY made for him. It was something to do with college tuition money this time around. Possibly YZY and WY both let the others think WY left of his own accord? @linderel

FOUND! 🧡 Where’s Your Emergency? by trippednfell (M, 64k, WangXian, 911 Dispatcher WWX, Single dad LWJ, Kid fic, Modern AU, D&D Games, Angst with a happy ending) could be near the end

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2. hello i am looking for a fic where wex was adopted into the wen sect. the scene i remember most is when wwx used a talisman to flatten himself so he can get through a door. id appreciate all the help thank you so much ♥️

FOUND! Communal Child-Rearing and Other Diplomatic Necessities by Elpie (Horribibble) (T, 4k, WangXian, LQR/WRH, Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiangs, Humor, Fluff and Humor, Accidental Baby Acquisition)

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3. for the next fic finder, can someone help me with a oneshot sickfic i have been finding for too long ;; i think the main premise was ljy pushing wwx into a pond bc he was upset, and so wwx got unwell (and didnt tell anyone?) thank you for the hard work!

FOUND? Some Days. by jollytortoise (Not Rated, 8k, WangXian, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, Shock, Horror)

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4. Hello! I'm looking for a fic where Wei Wuxian returns back from the dead in Mo xuanyu's body but he lost all his memories. He doesn't remember his name or any of the events of the past. He is saved by Lan zhan and the juniors as soon as he wakes up and they take him to Gusu where he lives and falls in love with Lan zhan. Lan zhan also falls in love with him but he is conflicted beacuse he feels like he's betraying wei wuxian. In the end, he remembers and they get together.

FOUND? Love Song In Reverse by timetoboldlygo (T, 237k, WangXian, Amnesia, Canon Divergence, Angst with a Happy Ending, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Non-Sexual Intimacy, Falling In Love, Slow Burn, agressively mixing and matching novel and cql canon, No Homophobia, Mentions of Starvation, Parental WWX)

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5. hi!! for the next fic finder — im looking for a wlw wangxian one where lwj was a cultivator(?) who sailed the ocean looking for resentful energy(??) (i dont remember) and one day she picks up mermaid wwx. i dont remember much other than wwx getting dry and turning into human, staying on her boat, and being curious about her own human anatomy which leads to lwj fucking her in every surface available. it Has plot. please help 🥺🥺🥺🫶🫶🫶

FOUND! 💖 splash;; by defractum (nyargles) (E, 11k, wangxian, F/F, modern cultivation, Gender Changes, Merpeople, Humanfucking, the opposite of monsterfucking, Rule 63)

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6. FF request! This is a modern au. I think wwx, lwj, lxc, nmj, nhs and maybe also jc, jyl, jzx, wq and wn, go on some sort of vacation under the excuse of night hunting. They finish a night hunt really quickly and then nmj (as the oldest and only sect leader?) is basically like, I don't care what you guys do, this is my vacation. They're all staying in the same house and divide into rooms by couple. Any ideas are much appreciated! Thank you!

FOUND? 🔒 Night Hunts and Getaways by Netrixie (T, 7k, LXC/NMJ, WangXian, JYL/JZX, JC/NHS, WWX & LXC, NHS could be a criminal mastermind, if he really wanted to, but he uses his powers for good, the plot exists merely for LXC to get some dick, so don't think too hard about it, Modern Cultivation, Everything is Beautiful and Nothing Hurts, LXC centric, treating canon with gleeful irreverence, ships other than nielan are background, Attempt at Humor) It's part of a series.

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7. Hi! This is for Fic Finder. ☺️

I'm trying to find two fics. I don't remember much, unfortunately.

A) It's a time travel in which WWX comes back in time and go to visit WQ to convince her that he is from future and both make a long term plan to eliminate all the "bad guys".

B) It's also a time travel, but this time WWX is found by the Wens and is raised with the heirs of WR. The scene I remember quite well is one in witch LWJ is fighting with one of the Wen heirs (don't remember who, not WQ or WN) and when the Wen is going to attack LWJ, he sees the red ribbon that WWX gifted to LWJ. This means that LWJ is WWX's love (and fiance maybe?) so the Wen decided not to attack LWJ and it's killed.

I hope you can help me, thanks for everything!

🥰💕 @wangxiansgirl

7A)

FOUND? Here With Me ‘verse Series by iamwish (T/G, 80k, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, wwx turns this into a no war!au, Canon-Typical Violence, Period-Typical Homophobia, Bad Parent YZY, POV WWX, POV LWJ, POV JC, Somebody Lives/Not Everyone Dies, WWX Has PTSD, and also depression sometimes, Unreliable Narrator, Character Death, Blood and Gore, BAMF WWX, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, there’s some elements of, Grief/Mourning, Character Study, POV JYL, Angst, Implied/Referenced Character Death)

FOUND? We'll Build A Dynasty (one the heavens can't shake) by One_eyed_God (T, 66k, WangXian, canon typical Jiang family dynamics, BAMF WWX, Canon JC Characteristics, POV Outsider, Hurt/Comfort, Pre-Relationship, WWX is a Wen, Sect Leader WWX, Genius WWX, The Casual Intimacy of Hand-Holding, Minor ChenLi, Not JC Friendly, Time Travel, Time Travel Fix-It)

7B)

FOUND? When Flowers Spring from Killing Things by windsweptice (B0redaf) (Not rated, 100k, wangxian, Wen WWX, Demonic Cultivation, WWX Has No Golden Core, he's got a resentful one instead, Yīn Iron, WRH pov, LWJ pov, WWX pov, WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiāngs, Sentient Burial Mounds, XY Is A Little Shit, WQ pov, Protective WWX, Protective WQ, Cinnamon Roll WN, Protective WN, LXC pov, BAMF WWX, Burning of the Cloud Recesses, Fall of Lotus Pier, Cultivation Discussion Conferences, BAMF LWJ, BAMF WN, BAMF WQ, Good Person WX, WWX Has a New Golden Core, Cloud Recesses Shenanigans, Weddings) the scene with the ribbon being spotted is in Chapter 18

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8. Hi so I'm trying to find a podfic that I listen to few years ago I don't remember a lot about it but I do remember that wei ing wen ing and wen qing went to his nephew's naming ceremony or birthday I forget and Yu Ziyuan and Jiang Fengmian we're alive and there for their grandson's naming ceremony or birthday and I remember that madam yu come up to wei ing and took his wrist and like looked if he had a golden core she was like I don't know how she reacted but she respected him because he gave his golden cord to his little brother and like I don't know much I can't remember much but I do remember there was a scuffle and all that I'm just trying to find this podfic if you can find it please tell me if you can't well at least you tried @constancebloodstone

FOUND? seldom all they seem by Fahye (E, 25k, WangXian, Canon Divergence, Arranged Marriage, or rather Arranged Betrothal, followed by Weapons-Grade Thirst)

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9. Hello! For fic finder: I am looking for a fic where Wei Wuxian was cursed to lie / say the opposite of what he truly thought. But everyone thought he was cursed to tell the truth, so when he says all kinds of horrible things to people they believe him thinking that he has been compelled to say what he really thinks of them. The curse is only broken after people realize he is lying (not truthing). Wei Wuxian then has a series of conversations with the various characters as he reassures them that he was lying and that he didn’t mean whatever he said. He also has some angst about how people so easily thought the worst of him / believed his lies. This plot is so clear in my head but I just can’t find it in my ao3 history! Please, can anyone find this? Thank you in advance <3 <3

FOUND? A Kiss of True Love to break a Curse by Wangxian101 (T, 5k, WangXian, Teenage Wangxian, Not Canon Compliant, kiss of true love, curse of lies, truth curse, Angst, Fluff, When the only way to break the curse is to kiss, Hurt/Comfort, Emotional Hurt/Comfort, Fluff and Angst, Angst with a Happy Ending, Teen Angst, They are in love your honour, Oblivious WWX, Oblivious LWJ, there is only one brain cell in this group and it belongs to JC, LXC is the biggest wangxian shipper, jc is a good bro, Love Confessions, Getting Together, Gremlin WWX, Happily Every After, LXC will gut anyone who hurts his precious little brother, True Love's Kiss, JC is an awkward bean, LWJ POV, WWX POV, WWX is a closet romantic, WWX loves his romance novels, Protective JC, JC loves his gremlin brother, Unrequited Love, Requited Unrequited Love, it all works out in the end)

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10. Hi 👋🏼 can you please find me this fic . It was WIP when I came across it. idk if it has been updated or not . The story went like meng yao , xue yang, and Wei Ying all end up in Burial Mounds as kids, and they are adopted by the ghost ? Of a queen of a fallen kingdom. I think the wens had something to do with the destruction of the kingdom.

FOUND? The Kids Are Okay (I Think) by GossamerGlint (Not Rated, 80k, JGY & WWX, WWX & XY, WWX & JGY & XY, WangXian, WIP, give wwx jgy and xy a mom agenda, but not just any mom, powerful ghost empress mom with a revenge plot :), Royalty AU, Prince WWX, Prince JGY, Prince XY, Burial Mounds, Yílíng Wèi Sect, more like yiling xue sect, its... complicated, illustrated when the mood strikes)

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11. HEYYYYY!! there was this pretty woman fusion of wangxian, can you please find it?????

FOUND? A Sure Thing by ElDiablito_SF (E, 40k, WangXian, Modern, Pretty Woman Fusion, Prostitution, Unsafe Sex, Explicit Sexual Content, Attempted Sexual Assault, You'd think this would be wild and kinky, but actually they're soft and gross, past Zhancheng and they're still friends, Prostitute WWX, rich asshole LWJ, fashion bitch LWJ, Shoe Porn, background attempted Xiyao, Drinking to Cope, physical assault, Villain JGY, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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12. For fic finder: It was a canon-divergent or post-canon fic where someone reminds Wei Wuxian that the juniors grew up in a time of peace and so they don’t have war-instincts (like startle reflexes or ptsd from battle, and in general they are too trusting). I think the juniors too were warned that the older generation is more jumpy because of what they had been through when they were teens, and so they shouldn’t sneak up on Wei Wuxian. Unfortunately I don’t remember any of the actual plot, just this bit about the differences between the generations.

FOUND? tell some storm by qurbat (G, 31k, wangxian, JC & WWX, LSZ & WWX, NHS & WWX, Post-Canon, Hurt/Comfort, Fluff, liberal amounts of outsider POV, the legend of wangxian, how to create a romance epic for dummies) since wwx has a conversation with lsz in chapter 2 about wwxs generation being one of war

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13. hello dear, I was looking for a ff where wei wuxian left with a-yuan after wen remnants are dead. NHS secretly send them materials anonymously. After NMJ died, NHS come to wei wuxian to find his brother's body.

FOUND? Innocence by snowberryrose (G, 8k, WangXian, Introspection, Family, Canon Divergence)

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14. I wanted you to find a fic I read and lost among the saved ones I have. it was where the lans protected wwx and the time wwx saw them protecting him. I think it was 4 parts and 1. I just remember that. thank you if you find it and sorry for disturbing

FOUND? one of our own by glitteringmoonlight (G, 7k, WangXian, Post-Canon, POV Outsider, 5+1 Things)

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15. Hi! I'm looking for a fic where wangxian were already married ig but don't love each other just yet and one day wy faints due to lack of scenting so they start as ordered by lqr. At the end or something wy leaves lwj for a bit because he's angry that lwj told him to stand up for himself when jiangs insult him, but he comes back after lwj apologises to wn for slapping him. Also I think its jiang corp and lan corp kinda stuff and wy is stuck in btw. Thank you sm I know this is confusing so sorry @tinkalb

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16. I'm looking for some fics where Wei Ying achieves some sort of mastership(?) in cultivation. I think there were two of them that I read which had this idea... but I'm not sure now. I vaguely recall that he had to travel quite a bit to get to an instituion of some sort and there was a series of tests that he had to pass. I think there might also be something about him having to save up the money for it. Thanks!

FOUND? 🧡🔒Truth Will Out (when caught on video) - End_OTW_Racism! by KizuKatana (E, 179k, wangxian, WN & WWX & WQ, graphic depictions of violence, modern cultivation, canon divergence, YZY abuses WWX , caught on camera, partial core removal, WWX kicked out of Jiang sect, livestreamer WWX, meet ugly, dual cultivation, smut, no war) For #16 of the recent Fic Finder with WWX getting mastership in a cultivation field, there’s a chance it might be Truth Will Out by KizuKatana. The only thing is, WWX doesn’t actually achieve mastership, but he goes to Gus’s LAN to apply for a teaching job for talismans, and LWJ won’t consider him for multiple reasons including that WWX doesn’t have a master’s license (something like that)

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17. Hi, love your blog. Thanks for sharing such great content always! I would like to please request your assistance with finding a fic, it's driving me crazy because I thought I saved it. It's a modern au and lwj and wwx are coworkers and lwj is really shocked because wwx just came back from the dead 13 years later and he's acting normal in the office. Wwx has no idea he was dead the whole time. Please let me know if you know of it, thank you! @qilin-world

FOUND? A Ghost Story by Anonymous (E, 51k, WangXian, WIP, Graphic Depictions of Violence, Major Character Death, Modern with Magic, Mentions of Major Character Death, Resurrection, (the character death is not permanent), grave desecration, Grief/Mourning, Panic Attacks, Dreams and Nightmares, Hurt/Comfort, LWJ Whump, Angst with a Happy Ending, Blood and Gore, Body Horror, Self-Harm, (the gore/body horror/self-harm all take place in dreams but they are still graphic), Compulsory Heterosexuality, internalized kinkshaming, Consensual Non-Consent, Masturbation, Bondage, WWX is a Manic Pixie Dead Boy) this fic has everything but WWX was only dead for three years, not thirteen

FOUND? Exactly what he wanted by Rookseeksraven (E, 32k, WangXian, Modern, Sex Cam Worker LWJ, Light Angst, Happy Ending, Implied/Referenced Housing Insecurity, Inaccurate sex cam work, Inaccurate sex, weirdo4weirdo, Masturbation, Vibrators, Creampie, WangXian Have a Breeding Kink, Unsafe Sex, they're really horny, Switch WangXian, Bathroom Sex, Office Sex, Consensual Somnophilia, Cock Ring, Gags, Light Bondage, Nipple Piercings, Internalized Homophobia, not Jiang friendly, Slight LQR bashing, Getting Together, Secret Identity)

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18. Thnks for your work! I'm looking for a modern au fic. Teens WWX and LWJ were chess players who knew each during junior competitions. WWX struggled to befriend LWJ until he got LWJ to invite him to his house. They meet again at a chess competition and they kiss. Everything is ruined when SMS (¿?) accuses WWX of cheating and nobody believes in his innocence. WWX abandons the competition and don't contact LWJ. 13 years pass and LWJ faces WWX again in another competition but he is disguised as MXY

FOUND? Trebuchet by vesna (mrsronweasley) (E, 61k, WangXian, Modern AU, they’re chess players in this, Rivals to Friends to Lovers, Slow Burn, rocky reunions, Good Uncle LQR, best boy wn, Oral Sex, Anal Sex, Unprotected Sex, Angst with a Happy Ending)

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19. Hello, for fic finder, can u help me find a fic with wangxian fake dating? I remember a particular scenario where, during the wen doctrine WWX asks LWJ to marry him expecting rejection but LWJ agrees. And our sweet sweet WWX proposes to fake a relationship and not bcoz he was head over heels in love with LWJ. I don't remember anything else from the fic. Sorry. Can you help me? @grrumpywoof

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20. greetings! i'm trying to find a fic where jyl is the one who time travels. her younger counterpart is still present, so she takes street kid wwx and lives in wen territory. she falls in love with wen qing & ning's (mother? father?) and discovers cooking cultivation. she assassinates wrh with it, allowing wwx to meet lwj as he gets older.

FOUND! 後悔莫及 (Too Late for Regrets) by liverbiver9 (T, 20k, JYL/OC, WangXian, Time Travel Fix-It, Canon Divergence, JYL-centric, POV JYL, Genderqueer WWX, Trans Male Character, Kid Fic, Child WWX, Fluff and Angst, Family Feels, Found Family, WWX is a Wen, technically, Assassination Attempt(s), WWX Isn't Adopted by the Jiangs, Minor MianQing, No Sunshot Campaign, No Golden Core Transfer, Everybody Lives, mentioned minor character death, Gender Non-Conforming WWX, Trans WWX)

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[blackdragoness]

⛽GASING YOU UP, BABY⛽

YALL NOT READY FOR ALL DIS' GASSSSS. Lemme gasssss yo lil fat head up, okayyyy. This PICK-A-PILE is for you!

"somebody call 911, shawty fiyah burnin' on da dance floor." -sean kingston

Pile 1 -

Pile 2 -

Pile 3 -

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Pile 1: Show Stunnah 🌻

Overall Tarot Card: The Devil 😈

Channelled Song: Pretty Girl Rock by Keri Hilson

⛽ The gasssss on you is....⛽

🚨🚨ALARMS GOING OFF. YOU SHUTTING THIS SHIT DOWNNNN. LESSSGOOOO 🚨🚨

First of all, you muthafucka's is FINE as hell! I'm talking about FOIIINNEEEE as hell. Body on fleek, face card never declines. As soon as you walk into the room, all eyes are on you and all your competition starts to die a little inside 😂 You are the talk of the town, the talk of every circle, babbyyy 🤤 But y'all been knew dat, 😏

"BEEN that bitch, still that bitch" - Megan The Stallion

Natural beauty with the confidence to match

Confidence of a lion(ess)

Honestly, physically, you got it muthafuckin' going on dawg, what the fuckkkkk. Out of all the piles, this one wins in the Looks Department LOL sorry to the other piles

I'm seeing a face that is so fucking beautiful and angelic. Forever youthful.

Your beauty never dies and it never ages.

I have this huge urge to gasp in awe! You make people gasp with your beauty, ermagerrrdddd this is too cute! I feel like I'm melting in your presence 🫠. It's like everytime people see you in person, you take their breathe away and all they can do is gasp in awe at your undeniable beauty 😂😂😂 it's so fucking corny bro, but damn. That was a channelled message for someone's fine ass out there. You got it like that Mami/Papi, *snap snap snap*

A literal fucking goddess/god. Like you make men want to turn all romantic and old school, writing poems and singing outside your window in the middle of a full moon & shiiit. Or for my men, you make a girl wanna break all her rules and go buck wild for you!!! Like this shit crazzzyyy!! But this is what you be doing to these people lmaoooo!

I'm sure you're a great person on the inside and all, but there is so much emphasis on your physique that I apologize if you feel exploited right now 😂😂 and tbh, you might know the effects your body causes on people so you might be a person with strong boundaries. But damn Papi, what dat body do? 😏

With the devil card crowning your reading, people are OBSESSED WITH YOU!!! Bitch, who tf are you? Why is everyone so fucking obsessed with yo ass!? Lmao

"I can do bad all by myself." You're very independent but you may have many friends too.

Imma just say it flat out: YOU GOT THAT GOOD WAP BABYYYYYY. THAT GOOD WOOD, ya know what I'm sayin' 😂 rumor has it, you can fucking werkkkk it. You got people THIRSTY AF out here, mayneee. Chilllllllll.

You got this hella chill vibe to you though. Like laid-back. Relaxed. Not about the shits or the drama. People can try to ruffle your feathers to get any type of reaction out of you but you stay unbothered AF and that's what draws them nearer to you.

You have a gift for social interactions. Most people have social anxiety but you maneuver and work the room with ease and calmness. It's very admirable.

So many people want to marry you dude, I'm not even kidding. But I'm sensing that you are just focused on yourself and your goals. Relationship isn't a priority in your life right now. But that also is what turns the thirst factor UP when it comes to you.

SEXY, SEXY, SEXY, SEXY, SEXXXXX-Y.

Rich girl, city girl, material gworl vibes

"You always got dem eyes on you" - people love to watch you and stare at you. Sometimes people zone out in conversation with you because your beauty distracts them 😂 you could be talking to them in perfect pronunciation and speed but they won't hear a damn thing you said lol I guess your beauty is deafening too 😂

As beautiful and as sexy as you are, you also have a tender kindness when you interact with anybody. Your beauty shines both inside and out and that's why you are the mf GOAT.

You turn heads every where you go. You got bitches jealous wishing they was you. Ermahgerrrddd, I'm getting a rush of energy from tons of people who fantasize about what it would be like if they had your life. Honestly, that sounds like I'm over hyping y'all, but it's the truth lol. Maybe knowing this information will help you see the beauty of your own life and appreciate it for what it is. Because from folks looking on the outside into your life, they would literally trade spots with you in a heartbeat. Heck, they are already doing it in their daydreams. Recognize that YOU ARE THAT BITCH.

You may come from a great family life. Or people think you come from a super good looking family judging based off of your looks alone lol

A lot of people want to be tied to you in some way. People feel that being connected to you gives them "brownie points" in popularity 😂😂 some people may try to befriend you for clout. I'm not even getting social media vibes, although y'all may be big on social media too. But I'm sensing like real life clout, which is ten times better than social media clout, ya feel me. It's almost like knowing you in real life makes people feel more important in real life.

Y'all are the IT GIRL/ IT BOY. Everyone wanna be you, do the things you do, talk like you, walk like you, fucking everyfannnggg!!! I cannot with y'all. You guys are unreal but thats why we are so fucking obsessed with you, booo. Keep doing you and keep being you 🌻

--------------------------------------------------------------

Pile 2 - Cutie Pie 🥧

Overall Tarot Card: Ace of Cups

Channelled Song: My Bestie by Lloyd ft Sevyn

⛽ The gasssss on you is.....⛽

🍯🍯CUTENESS OVERLOAD!!!!!!! YOU ARE THE CUTEST FUCKING THING EVER 🍯🍯

Everyone wants to hug you, squeeze you, love on you. Stick you in their pocket and take you home. This vibe is so mushy and gooey!

Everybody's little sister. You provoke a very protective spirit in those around you and those close to you. You are looked at as something that needs to be protected at all costs.

I dunno what it is about you but people will go to bat for you no matter the situation or the time. If ever you are in trouble, you have a whole gang of people who you can count on to drop what they are doing and prioritize you. Even if they are pissed off at you, they would lay their differences to the side and come to your rescue.

You make people feel very emotional when it comes to even just the thought of you. You are so special to people I don't think you realize that!

You are that person in people's lives that they cannot imagine ever losing. Like an angel in disguise who needs to be protected from this cruel world.

You attract friends like flies!!!!! This pile is SOOOOOOO popular and you don't even have to try. You could actually be a more introverted and reserved person but constantly have a crowd of people with you.

Sooooo warm and soft. Feels like I'm sinking in an ocean of really warm honey. That's how you make people feel.

People LOVE hugging you, cuddling you, and feeling you. Your presence is very calming and motherly.

You have great motherly instincts and people trust you with their children and animals. Kids might naturally flock to you and easily trust you because of your kind nature.

You may only consider a small group of people as friends but there are so many people who consider you as one of their best friends. You may make some friends jealous because they envisioned some type of exclusive friendship with you. However, a lot of people need you in their life and so that's something they need to come to terms with.

A lot of people feel like they can confide in you with confidential matters, knowing it will be kept safe. You also give really great advice that helps people progress further on their life path.

You are a very necessary presence in many peoples life stories. If every human soul had a book about their life, there would be at least one chapter about you in multiple life books. While most people are only focused on writing their own book, they are scarcely mentioned in other stories. But you, you are very necessary in the development of other people's life journeys. Like you make an impact on their story for the better. Wowwwww. I can only imagine that this role comes with a lot of positive karma for you and your generations to come.

You beautify every place you enter, every floor you walk on, and every person you meet. You are a contagious ray of light that shines everywhere you go even in the darkest of places.

You very rarely compete or get jealous of people and that's why many consider you to be their best friend. They feel completely free to be themselves around you with no judgement, guilt or shame.

You are unapologetically yourself and it's a big turn on for the opposite sex.

Many people wish they could possess your unapologetic nature but they are realizing it is a lot harder to mimic than they thought.

"I walk like this cuz I can back it up. I got a big ego" -Beyonce

You been through a lot and it shows through how sweet and caring you are. And because you put out that energy, people wanna love you the same way in return.

You really tug at people's heart strings when they think of you. I'm hearing "a heart of gold and titanium". So valuable and indestructible.

You have been placed on this throne by a lot of people. Very very respected and admired. I'm hearing you proved yourself. Your true colors shown and they worked in your favor.

An example for others to follow

A true royal

SELF-CONTROL, SELF-CONTROL, SELF-CONTROL. You have so much self control and people are both envious and admiring that trait of yours. "The one with the most control over themselves is the one with the most power in the room."

You might be a very adaptable person. You literally can chop it up with anybody you want! No personality is too hard for you to adapt to.

You have such a knack for resolving conflict. You can de-escalate any situation with your soft spoken voice and level-headedness. Things always run smoother when you are around.

People take you seriously and really listen when you speak. You may not vocalize your opinions as often as others, but when you finally do, it shocks people, so they listen.

A deep well of wisdom.

Honorable. Highly respected. Highly trusted.

--------------------------------------------------------------

Pile 3 - LEGEND ⚜️

Overall Tarot Card: 8 of Pentacles

Channelled Song: One Call Away by Bina Butta

⛽ The gasssss on you is.....⛽

🥶🥶 YOU OUT HERE GIVING US THE SHIVERS WITH YO ICY FINE ASS 🥶🥶

BOSS BITCHHHHH. I see you focused on that bag and getting that bag!!! If you chose this pile, YOU LOOK LIKE MONEY, HUNNY 🤑

"came through drippin *drip drip*"

You are a hard ass worker. I'm getting strong energy coming from the workplace you work at. You got a lot of people dumbfounded at your work ethic. For some reason, I'm getting that they didn't think you were going to be the type of worker that you are.

You may be known as someone who bosses up every time you experience a hardship in life. It's actually pretty phenomenal to watch.

Phoenix rising from the ashes.

You are that one character in a movie story that never dies 😂 it's like no matter how many battles you fight, you never fucking die lol it's annoying to your haters but so inspiring to those who witness this inner strength of yours.

You are a LEGEND! Some people think that your life experiences are too good to be true. But they just ain't ever met nobody like you before thats why. I'm hearing that behind your back people try to investigate the validity of your story just to be humbled when they find witnesses who retell the same story.

People want to know the depths of your life experience. I'm getting that people view you kind of like Indiana Jones who is well travelled with many stories and adventures to tell for many days.

You inspire people to think outside of the box. To want more for themselves and be open to newer opportunities that can make them feel free and alive again. You make them want to explore life again.

You walk around like a large ball of life force energy. Anything within a 5 foot radius of you starts to be influenced by your vibration.

A lot of people speak about you!!! A lot of people have your name in their mouth. It's very positive though. I'm hearing a lot of praise, chanting your name. Celebrating you!

I sense you might be hermit mode or really just focusing on yourself. People can see the changes that are happening through your physical appearance . Your hardwork and focus shines through your countenance.

You have a lot more people who support and love you. Im feeling that for this pile, the support isn't as apparent as it was for Group 2. I'm feeling like this pile stands alone with lots of silent supporters. Something about you being very intimidating or being closed off to a connection is what's blocking people from showing their support but it's like they understand why you are closed off and respect your boundaries.

People feel like you are going very far in life and will hit it big in the future. They want to see you win and are silently watching until then.

The way you carry yourself is top notch alpha type vibes. Specifically for my feminines, this is so sexy about you. You carry this masculine energy in such a sexy feminine way it intimidates and submits even the strongest of men. Very BAWS BOSS like.

RAWRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRRR 🦁

BOSS, BOSS, BOSS, BAWSSSYYYYYY

"Dat ass, dat ass, dat ass, dat ass" 🤨🤨okaaayyyy, someone clearly has a nice juicy ass that needs to be pointed out 🤷🏾‍♀️

You must have a very strong presence in your work place because the energy keeps taking me to a work environment. Either that or you think about work all the time 😂 you really are such an independent woman. Some may call it hyper independent but do you honey. Set the standard as high as you want. Don't let their intimidated ass opinion shrink you 😉

Maybe you own a lot of businesses or aspire to own your own business. People see the potential for you. But I'm getting indecisive energy. You are probably really talented at SOOO many things and are weighing out your options. However, you know that once you have made your decision, there is no stopping you from reaching the top. Everyone else knows it too and that's why they are silently watching you.

You are a rare human. You have an imagination that is so active. Anything you imagine, you create in this world. You were probably a very imaginative kid and highly active. With how hard you work coupled with your crazy active imagination, you actually have the power to manifest whatever you want into existence. Maybe you are aware of that. Maybe you aren't. But channelling this energy feels very magnetic and strong. Keep your imaginations alive. Keep your dreams alive. Chase them.

People wonder how you gained such a bright imagination. They wish they could have that light that you have. You heal a lot of people's inner child by giving them experiences to exercise their imagination. Maybe you enjoy conversations about the trendy things from people's childhoods or you like to talk about the future a lot. You spark creativity and imagination for people and it gives them motivation for life again.

You lead by example. Lots of people are out here running they mouth but you stay steady on your grind proving your worth through your life.

You have silent supporters because you are a silent leader. You don't do much talking. You just do the damn thing and later on people find out what you did and are completely shocked.

You are a bombshell. Not only do you look great but you're like a ticking time bomb in people's minds. You constantly have people stewing over you and then boom, you do something that blows everybody's minds lol. I like this vibe. Very spontaneous and fun to be around

[ladykailitha]

Oh For a Muse of Fire! Part 14

Steve to the rescue again. Eddie is having a horrible week.

Part 1 Part 2 Part 3 Part 4 Part 5 Part 6  Part 7  Part 8  Part 9 Part 10  Part 11 Part 12  Part 13  

*

When Steve came home that night, Robin was waiting for him on their couch.

“Hey, Robs,” he greeted warmly. “How was work?”

“Crystal is working out great, he’s got flare,” she said with a grin. “Like you, but different. He had us in stitches during clean up.”

Steve smiled. “I’ll miss you guys.”

Robin’s grin slid into something more dear. “Me too. But I get why you want to get the hell out of Dodge.”

Steve went to the fridge to get them a couple of sodas. When you can get your booze for free, you tend to have other kinds drinks around the house instead.

He handed her one and flopped down next her. “I talked to Mrs Byers and I’m pretty sure I’m going to ace the class. So guess who is graduating, baby?”

Robin squealed. “Yes! I guess Eddie was your lucky charm.”

Steve blushed.

“I didn’t see your painting when I came home,” she said slyly. “Is there a reason you didn’t bring it home?”

Steve’s eyes went wide. “Shit! I left in the car!” He scrambled out the door and was back in under a minute panting.

“Thank fuck it wasn’t too hot today,” he said between breathes. “Otherwise I would have started bawling.”

Robin held out grabby hands. “I want to see!”

Steve turned it around and handed the canvas to her.

“Holy shit, Steve!” she whispered. “This is really good. Like art gallery good.”

He blushed. “It’s just an assignment. It isn’t a big deal.”

“Like hell it isn’t,” she gushed. “You should submit this to the art show for graduating seniors.”

Steve opened his mouth for some excuse, but he didn’t have any. Not really. “Yeah. I’ll let Mrs Byers know.”

Robin handed the painting back and he set gently to the side.

“So what did you and Eddie do...?” she asked with a wink and then her face twisted. “If you had sex I don’t want to know that. Ew.”

Steve laughed. “How did you know I was with Eddie?”

She rolled her eyes. “Because there is no one else that you would play hooky for other than me and I since I worked, the only logical conclusion was Eddie.”

Steve’s face was nearly split in two by the grin that comment induced. “Fair enough. He had a nasty ex show up after class today and it really shook him up.”

Robin pushed his shoulder. “Fuck, dingus. You don’t know how to play fair, do you? I can’t make fun of something like that. Bastard.”

He huffed out a small laugh. “And then he wanted me to listen to some of the songs he’d been writing.”

She giggled and clapped her hands. “Anymore of them about you?”

Steve shook his head. “At least none of the ones he played for me sounded like they were about me. Not like the last one.”

Robin sighed. “Maybe they’re love songs and he’s not ready for you to hear him declare his undying love for you yet.”

He blushed. “He just so amazing, Robs. He deserves every good thing in this world and he just can’t seem to get there. And it’s pissing me off.”

“I know, sweetie,” she said. “I know.”

*

Steve and Robin walked out of their apartment the next day to see a bunch of guys surrounding Eddie.

“Call 911,” he hissed. “I’ll try to keep them busy until the cops arrive.”

Robin’s eyes were wide, but she nodded bravely.

Steve strolled toward the group with a goofy smile on his face. “Hey there, boys. I don’t think I’ve seen you guys around here before.”

The ring leader was a tall, broad-shouldered, good looking man with blond hair. The kind of person Steve would have hung out with in high school. But this was long past that.

They all turned to him and a chill went down Steve’s spine. Some of them had baseball bats and one of the had a tire iron.

And Eddie was in the middle looking terrified.

“Just keep walking,” the ringleader sneered. “We’ve got some business with the Freak here.”

The name sent a second, more dangerous chill down Steve’s spine. The Freak was what they called Eddie in high school. Because he was always out, loud, and proud and made sure it was everyone’s problem.

And then it hit him. He knew who the ringleader was. Fuck.

“Jason Carver, right?” Steve asked, goofy smile still plastered to his face.

Jason was a year behind Steve in high school at a rival school. Dude was so good he had made basketball team captain his junior year.

The ringleader turned further from Eddie to take a better look at Steve.

“Holy fuck!” Jason cursed. “Steve Harrington!”

Steve’s smile turned into a feral grin. “Oh good, you do remember me. And you’ll know that I’m famous for stopping what you’re about to do.”

“Steve!” Robin cried. “Catch!”

Steve’s hand came up and when it came back down everyone was staring at the bat now in his grasp. The top of it had been decorated with nails.

“I take this to Pride every year,” Steve said casually, like he was talking about the weather. “It’s my anti-homophobe bat. It’s a great deterrent for assholes like you.”

He twirled it around, warming up his wrist. “So are you going to walk away or are you boys going to be introduced to Hela?”

Jason looked at his friends and then back at Steve. “There are five of us and only one of you, you really think you can take all of us?”

Steve smiled warmly. “Of course not, I just have to keep you busy until the cops show up.”

Jason’s friends started to mutter to themselves.

Jason scoffed. “You didn’t have time to call the cops.”

Steve batted his eyelashes innocently at Jason. “I’ve never said I did. Robin called them while we were talking.”

They started to look at each other worryingly.

“And if I know Eddie,” Steve continued, “he’s hit the emergency button on his cell phone so that the cops have a recording you threatening to jump me with your buddies.”

Jason sneered. “I think you’re bluffing.” His friends didn’t look convinced.

“Hey, man,” one of the said, putting a hand on Jason’s arm, “if they did call the cops we need to get out of here.”

“Pussy,” Jason sneered, pulling away from him and grabbing the tire iron from him. “I’ll handle this myself.”

Steve cocked his head to the side. “I’m going so wreck that pretty face of yours Carver.”

Jason snarled like a cornered animal, full of rage and fear. He leapt forward swinging the iron like a club, all brute force and no finesse.

Steve loosened the muscles in his neck as Jason swung wildly passed where Steve had been previously, having stepped deftly to the side.

“That’s not the way you swing, you moron,” he heckled. “Maybe you should have taken some baseball with your basketball like I did.” Steve swung and tapped the back of Jason’s jacket. Not hard enough to actually hurt him, but enough that Jason stumbled as he was off balance because of his swing.

Jason fought to stay on his feet, but managed to whirl around to face Steve.

“You want to try again?” Steve asked, brightly.

Jason charged at him again and again Steve side stepped him, tapping him on the back as he passed.

Then there was the bee-whoop of a cop car pulling up. The four other guys pushed at each other in panic as they tried to run. But they ran straight into the arms of the waiting officers.

“Just put down the weapons, boys,” a big burly man said into his megaphone.

Steve laughed. “I’d love to, Chief Hopper. But I’mma gonna wait until he puts his down first.”

Hopper sighed so loud Steve could hear it without it being amplified by the megaphone.

“Harrington, I should have known,” Hopper croaked into the megaphone. “You! The other one.” Jason turned to him in shock at being called ‘the other one’. “I’d best be putting that tire iron down, before Steve decides you’re not worth the effort and flattens your face right quick.”

Jason looked back at Steve and then to Hopper. He slowly put the iron down. Steve did the same to his bat and kicked it behind him, where Robin ran to pick it up.

Jason held up his hands and slowly stood up. One of the deputies came running up and handcuffed him.

“You’re going to pay for this, Munson!” Jason snarled.

Eddie waved from where he was at Robin’s side, having dashed over there while the idiots were watching Jason and Steve fight.

They had to call Diamond and let him know they would be late. Eddie tried to call Joyce, but Hopper put a hand over his phone and gently lowered it.

“I’ve already let her know, son,” Hopper told him. “She says she’ll cancel classes for the rest of the week, if you need.”

Eddie shook his head. “Jus–just for today.”

Hopper nodded. “You take care, all y’all.”

Once their statements had been taken and they were allowed to leave, Steve put his hand on Eddie’s shoulder. “If you need me to call in again, I will.”

Eddie shook his head. “You still need to pay rent, Stevie. I’ll hang out with Uncle Wayne today.”

Steve grinned. “Good plan, nothing beats a tire iron like a mechanic’s wrench.”

Eddie grinned back. “I like the way you think, sweetheart.”

Steve pushed his shoulder. “Go on. Some of us have to work for our living.”

Eddie laughed and walked to his van, Steve shaking his head as he watched him go.

Part 15  Part 16  Part 17 Epilogue

Tag List: @artiststarme @allbymyselfexceptformycactus @spectrum-spectre @estrellami-1 @swimmingbirdrunningrock @gregre369 @itsall-taken @m-owo-n @zerokrox-blog @runyousillydetective @grimmfitzz @wonderland-girl143-blog @sapphirecobalt-1 @scheodingers-muppet @victor-thee-corvid @apricottree @bookbinderbitch @sleepyboosstuff @biatcgh @pixiefallingupthestairs @grtwdsmwhr @thepainisspicy @carlyv @eboyawstenn @bisexualdisastersworld @bidisastersworld @abstractnaturaldisaster @evix-syne666 @nerdsconquerall @lololol-1234 @goodolefashionedloverboi @chaoticlovingdreamer @a-little-unsteddie @val-from-lawrence @i-must-potato @elluminis @tailsfromthecrypt @danili666 @plyerice27 @alittlegreyfish  @n0-1-important @no-upper-limit-to-stupidity @maya-custodios-dionach @cinnamon-mushroomabomination @heaven428 @thedragonsaunt @ceaselessly-watching @imfinereallyy @messrs-weasley @sharingisntkaren

[vilevenom]

Are you the same Anon as the other hurt/comfort request? lol, it's all good if you are. I'm makin' this one a bit more fluffy <3 Here's some sick!fic for you. Once again, I don't headcanon the trolls caring about gender, but I still swapped the pronouns for you. This ficlet has nothing to do with the previous one. This is set post World Tour, but before Band Together. Enjoy!

It was odd for Branch not to see Poppy at the crack of dawn. Usually their chipper king was the first up and about in the morning, leading the village in their daily song and dance routine. But, this morning Branch had bounced out of her bunker to join in the song without her usual duet partner. She frowned as she walked through the village, looking high and low for Poppy, while giving half hearted greetings to the other trolls as she passed them by. She didn't want to ask anyone if they'd seen their king, as she could still vividly remember how most of the village had freaked out the last time he'd been sick. 'Poppy 911' was not a phrase she wanted to hear again anytime soon. Finally, she decided the only logical place Poppy could be was his pod. "Hello?" Branch asked as she knocked on the door, peeking inside as she did so, "Poppy? "Ugh," Poppy's voice groaned from his bed, an arm appearing from the pile of blankets to wave at Branch, "I'm here. I'll be up in, like, five minutes." Branch frowned lightly as she let herself into the pod, shutting the door quietly before moving across the pod to Poppy's bed. "Hey, sleepy head. You don't sound great. How're you feeling?" Poppy sat up, his eyes half closed and his hair wildly disheveled. Branch flinched back slightly as Poppy snuffled loudly before coughing into his elbow. "M'not feeling too great, if I'm being honest," Poppy sighed, rubbing at his right eye as he turned to look at Branch, "How late is it?" "You missed the morning song, but I don't think anyone thought too much about it. When I walked through town to get here, everyone just seemed to be going about their day. I didn't raise any alarm bells on my way, so no one else knows you're sick yet," Branch hummed, reaching across the bed to feel Poppy's forehead. The pink troll leaned into Branch's hand with a soft sigh. "You're nice and cool," Poppy hummed, even as Branch winced and pulled her hand away. "And you're burning up," she murmured, clicking her tongue with a shake of her head. "I'm going to go get some supplies from my bunker. You just rest, okay? I'll be back as quick as I can." "Nooo," Poppy whined, flopping back into his pillows. Branch chuckled. "Yeeesss," she echoed Poppy's tone, heading out the door, "Be right back." ~ When Branch returned, she came baring soup, juice, medicine, and books. She quickly cleaned off Poppy's bedside table, setting up the medicine and books there, before bustling about Poppy's kitchen to heat up a bowl of the soup she'd brought. "Here," she coaxed Poppy to sit up in bed, pressing a glass of juice into his hand, "it's orange juice. Lots of good stuff to help you feel better. Then you need to try and eat some soup, okay?" Poppy grumbled quietly, but drank half the glass of juice. "Good," Branch cooed, snagging the medicine from the table and pouring a dose into a spoon for Poppy, "Now, take this and drink the rest of the juice." "Ugh," Poppy grunted, scrunching his nose at the spoon, "That stuffs nasty." "That may be true, but it'll help make you feel better. You can drown the flavor out with the juice. Trust your nurse," Branch said with a soft smile, earning a wheezing laugh from Poppy. "Alright, alright," Poppy sighed, reluctantly taking the spoon full of medicine. He made a retching sound after swallowing, then quickly gulped down the rest of the juice. "Good boy," Branch laughed, taking the glass and spoon away. "Only you get to call me that," Poppy grumbled, flopping back into his pillows while half heartedly glaring at Branch.

Branch snorted, rolling her eyes as she went back to the kitchen to fetch the bowl of soup. "I guess it's a good thing I was the one that said it, huh?" "Mmm, yeah," Poppy sighed, groaning in protest as Branch made him sit up again. "C'mon," Branch sat on the bed with the bowl in hand, smiling in the face of Poppy's grumpy frown, "I'll feed it to you. How's that sound?" Poppy blinked, his cheeks darkening further than his fever had made them. "O-oh. Okay," he nodded, not making eye contact as Branch spoon fed him the soup until the bowl was nearly empty. "There we go," Branch cooed, setting the bowl aside on the side table.

"Now, scoot over."

"Huh?" Poppy said intelligently as Branch shoved at his hip and stole one of his pillows.

"I said, scoot over," Branch reiterated, poking Poppy in the side, making the pink troll giggle and curl to the side. Poppy then shifted until he was on one side of the bed, instead of in the middle. He watched curiously as Branch set up the stolen pillow and shuffled the blankets around until she was comfortably settled next to Poppy on the bed.

"What're you doing?"

Branch blinked, arching an eyebrow at Poppy. "I'm getting comfortable."

It was Poppy's turn to roll his eyes. "I can see that. I meant, why, though? I thought you'd want to get back to your bunker. You're usually really busy."

Branch stared Poppy down for a minute before letting out a light laugh. She reached out to cup Poppy's cheek, brushing her thumb just below his eye. "Yeah, usually. But, you're more important than any chores I had to do today. I'd rather stay here and look after you."

Poppy let out a dopey little trill of a laugh, leaning into Branch's hand. "Awww. You like meeee," he cooed in a sing-song voice, batting his eyelashes at Branch.

"Oh my troll," Branch snorted, patting Poppy's cheek before settling back into the pillows, plucking one of the books she'd brough off the bedside table, "Someone has to."

"Everyone likes me, but you liiiiiike meeee," Poppy said with a grin, moving to cuddle into Branch, settling his head on her stomach and wrapping his arm around her middle.

Branch flushed, a warm smile on her face as Poppy curled around her like a snuggle squid. "Some might even say I love you, you big goof ball."

"Mmmm, you loooove meee," Poppy echoed, obviously falling asleep.

"Yeah. I do," Branch sighed happily, absently combing her fingers through Poppy's hair as she turned to her book, Poppy's light snores sounding from her lap.

[bam-bi-buck]

911 Lonestar 5x06 SPOILERS

Did she say she bought it for a song?

Marlene is funny - Owen no funny business

Fr man, I’m keeping my eyes on you

Thunder is not a fan of Owen

Judd holding his hat

OUCH

lol why go to confession- apparently horses do just fine taking on your secrets

Yay Rudy! Thank you for not making things bad for Wyatt

Oh no Nancy

Mateo’s a little too chill about this, like I don’t know how many people actually got sent it but people can be really mean about that kind of stuff, shouldn’t just brush that off

Love Nancy and Mateo going all heist on everyone’s phones but like why not just be honest with Judd and TK? Like I get anyone else but they’d just hand over their phones

TK 🤣

Love that he’s like

Also Owen being like yeah i see through you - just have my phone

Love Tommy just wanting to make sure Nancy’s going to a medical professional

Nancy 😭

Nancy if three people in your family have died from breast cancer why aren’t you getting mammograms? 😭

Ouch that convo hurt 💔

Owen sleep walks now?

Poor Mateo being freaked out by sleep walking Owen

Does turning on lights wake up a sleep walker that fast?

Love Mateo & Marjan’s relationship

I’m glad Owen’s taking charge of

TK trying so hard to get Owen to open up to him 😭

Tommy supporting Nancy 😭

At the exact same clinic at the exact same time?

It’s crazy right? 🤣 She said that perfectly

Nancy 😭😭😭

All the fake names of the foods are funny

I knew something was gonna happen with that vending machine 😰

I told my mama!! (I thought it was gonna eat his arm)

Otto seems so sweet

Him saying he shouldn’t have been embarrassed to ask for help, that’s such an important message

Him asking Nancy to hold his hand 😭

Telling them about his crush 🥺

Noooo Otto 😭

Dukes like whatever dude not my problem with Owen almost dying

Owen that’s not funny - stop trying to get yourself killed

You should make sure no one can hear you tell that secret, my dude

Robert knows Owen way too well for how long they’ve known each other

Robert TOOK THE MASK OFF?!?!!

And Owen put it BACK on????

What the …

No wonder he’s been all 😵‍💫

Why are you going fuzzy

Why can the horse talk?

Ooooh the dog bust something open

No Duke!!

Owen why would you put him in path of the entrance? The horsies will head right to him and maybe kick him?

Just this once, you’re gonna trust me - that lien got to me, ngl

Boom!

Course he’s riding Thunder

No! No smiles at Marlene - not allowed Owen 🚫

You won’t be alone never again 😭

Mateo was gonna shave his head before they learned her diagnosis? That’s sweet but maybe jumping the gun a bit

Idky it’s so funny to me that Mateo still lives with Owen but I know Owen’s gonna have a freak out when he does move out and then it won’t be funny any more

Marjan looks so cute 🥰

Wyatt helping 🥺

Animal lover TK! Called it! (Not in the way I thought but still!!)

Owen stop flirting!!!

Boo! I went from super happy for Nancy to super sad for Tommy 😭

I knew it was coming but still 😭

Next week I’m gonna be a flop of emotions because I’m excited for TK’s bday and meeting Enzo BUT Tommy’s story is gonna wreck me and I’m scared for Wyatt’s

Anyways I’m 😵‍💫

[try-set-me-on-fire]

‘this is my husband/wife/girlfriend/boyfriend/partner etc.’ for soft fic prompts?

Send me soft fic prompts! Read the rest here!

Heather would say she's not having a great day. Sure, her and Tracy hadn't been on the most stable ground lately, but coming home from the San Francisco office to a two page (both sides!) handwritten letter full of incredibly beautiful prose that more or less boiled down to it’s not you, it’s me was still a shock. And, you know, maybe she had been spending too much time crunching for work, but she’d been trying to make senior art director for years and when she’d finally got the promotion she wanted to make sure the studio didn’t regret it. The studio who, 15 minutes after the whole ‘getting dumped, epistolary style’, called to tell her the promotion had been unpromotioned. Two steps, unpromotioned, actually, seeing as they were “taking the project in a new direction” and “felt she would be better suited to a support role rather than leadership.” And, you know, Heather thinks of herself as a relatively laid back person, she’s chill, she’s calm and collected, but after four straight months of 6 day work weeks pulling overtime almost every night she thought she deserved a face to face goddamn explanation for all of this, so she had climbed right back into the subaru she’d driven all night in and took off towards Burbank.

She’d made it three exits past her apartment when some asshole in a truck too big for him to control had swerved into her.

At least someone's already called 911, judging by the emergency vehicles pulling up, and this was a rental car paid for with company dime, so she doesn't even have to stress about it being crumpled up like a tin can. There's a tap on the window frame (the glass is gone, she hadn't even noticed) and she startles, peering out at the platonic ideal of a hot guy she might have described to friends as her "type" when she was sixteen and still trying to be straight. Ruffled dark hair, warm eyes, a kind look on his face. She can't see his arms under his firefighter coat, but she bets they're jacked.

"Hi," the apparition says. "My name's Eddie Diaz. Are you in any pain?"

"Uh," Heather says, trying to take stock. "Mostly shaky, I think."

He nods, shining a flashlight in her eyes. "Can you wiggle your fingers for me? How 'bout your toes?"

"Eyes and ears and mouth and nose," she sing songs as she does so, and Eddie Diaz has the good grace to laugh.

"Alright, you're a little scraped up but I don't think you have a concussion. Can you tell me your name, the date, and where we are?"

"Heather Pantry, July 23rd, the 5 somewhere near Atwater."

"Pantry?" Eddie quirks an eyebrow as he examines the car around her.

"Hand to god," she says, used to the double take. "From the proud Pantry line of middle of nowhere Massachusetts."

"Well, good to meet you Ms. Pantry. I have to go get-" Eddie straightens up and waved someone over. "Honey, can you stay with her? I'm gonna grab the jaws and some bandages."

Eddie steps away and a new man crouches in his place. He's blondish, has a red birthmark splotched above his eye, and is grinning cheerfully. "Hey, we're gonna get you out of here in no time."

"I bet you got shit from other kids about your name too, huh?" She smiles at him in commiseration, and then confusion as he looks at her questioningly. "Oh, you didn't hear- I'm Heather Pantry. And you're Honey, right? Food names."

His face stays puzzled for a second before he laughs. "Ah, no." He jabs a thumb in the direction Eddie walked. "I'm married to that guy." He says it proudly, and his grin gets somehow more cheerful.

"Oh, shit, sorry," she says as he flaps an understanding hand.

"Don't worry about it, just don't let our colleagues know he used a pet name at work or we'll never hear the end of it. My name's Buck Diaz." He holds out a hand.

She mimes a zipper over her mouth as she shakes it. Multi tasking! Take that, potential concussion! Her eye catches on his name tag as he pulls away and she frowns. Aw no, concussion. "Why does that say…"

Buck looks down at the letters. "Ah, right. Well, I took Eddie's name when I got married, but my- everyone calls me Buck, has for ages, but it's a nickname from my old last name, and I didn't want to be Evan Diaz with no tie to that, so I changed my first name too, because Evan just isn't really my name anymore. But," he gestures down at the name tag, and then over his shoulder at the back of his jacket. "The names on our turnouts are one of the ways we find each other in low visibility, and how we might be initially identified if something, uh, goes wrong, and everyone rejected my perfectly good idea of being labeled 'Diaz 1' and 'Diaz 2' so… I was born Evan Buckley, my legal name is Buck Diaz, my work name is Buckley, sometimes people call me Buckaroo, and Chimney says they should just start sending me out to explain all that as the new concussion protocol."

"Chimney?"

"You'd fit right in around here, Pantry. You looking for a career change?"

"Hah," she says. "The LAFD looking to recruit failed art directors who can't maintain a good relationship with the best girl they've ever known?"

Buck grimaces in sympathy. "You've had a rough day."

"I've certainly had better." She looks at her shit thrown all about the car, feeling a little pathetic, and then back at Buck. If something goes wrong… "Is it hard, working together? Do you- I mean, either of you could get hurt at any time. It's gotta be hard knowing that, or- seeing that. Being there."

Buck's smile turns a little rueful, and he looks back towards the firetruck for a moment. "Yeah… we've had our fair share of close calls." He laughs, though there's not much humor in it, and starts holding up fingers. "Eddie's been crushed in a collapsed well 40 feet underground, and he got shot standing two feet in front of me, and there was the whole thing with the freeway collapse - which is how we got together, actually - and I've been crushed under a firetruck, was on the pier with our kid when the tsunami hit, and I got struck by lightning." He does a little jazz hand. "I died for three minutes."

"And seventeen seconds," comes Eddie's quiet voice. He's standing there with the supplies, looking down at Buck, something too steps more sad than a frown on his face.

Buck looks up at him, eyes intense, smile small. "And seventeen seconds," he corrects, and then looks back at Heather with both eyebrows up. "I don't recommend it!"

"I'll do my best to not get deceased."

“But I think…” Buck looks thoughtful as he stands to let his husband press gauze to cuts Heather didn’t know she had. “I’d rather be here, than not. I want to be by Eddie’s side, even and especially when things are hard, and to, uh,” he laughs a private laugh, bumps his elbow with Eddie’s. “To have his back, like I know he has mine.” Together, they work the jaws into the door and finally wrench it open with a terrible metallic screech. “And anyway, some of that stuff happened while I wasn’t even at work, so bad things can happen at any time. I want to… know I had the chance to do something about it, when they do.”

Both of the men reach in to help Heather, moving around each other so easily, so familiar. Her eyes sting a little, and she could blame it on the scrapes but she’s thinking of Tracy singing while she does the dishes. She sniffs a little as Buck holds her elbow. “Wasn’t… the tsunami years before the freeway collapse? You guys had a son already?”

They make eye contact over her head (jesus, they’re tall, is that a firefighter requirement?) and Eddie laughs first but Buck really cracks up.

“We may have done things a little out of order,” Eddie says, loud enough to be heard over Buck’s guffaws. His eyes are crinkled up. “Let’s get you to the ambulance, Ms. Pantry.”

She’s handed over to other paramedics, who go through a more thorough checklist than Eddie’s field triage. She’s paying attention to the questions, she is, but the ambulance doors are still open and she sees Eddie in the shade of the fire truck look around before pulling Buck close, a hand gentle on his cheek. He kisses him, and they’re pretty far away but she thinks the small smile on his face is probably visible from Saturn.

The doors close, and she’s carted off towards Cedars-Sinai where as soon as she’s cleared to leave she’ll find the gift shop and buy a notepad, a get well soon card, a coloring book- anything she can write on. She has a letter to send.

[plotting-against-you]

Overwhelmed

Fandom: One Chicago

Characters: Ellie Halstead, Jay Halstead, WIll Halstead

Summary: Jay and Will's little sister has anxiety, and it's gotten worse. This is how she deals with it.

Warnings: Possible anxiety attack triggers because an anxiety attack is featured in here.

Author's Note: This is based on my own experiences with an anxiety disorder (among other things), and it looks different for everyone. Please, if you feel this way, get help. It can be scary, but I promise you I will always be here to listen.

*Based on the song "overwhelmed" by Royal & the Serpent

“To report suspicious activity….”

“You can call 911 for an immediate response….”

“And there’s still no working cure for the virus….”

“Ugh!” Ellie groaned as she turned off the television and tossed her remote across the room.

She pulled her knees up to her chest and forced herself to take a few deep breaths. No matter which channel she tried to watch, the news blared back at her reminding her of the scary and dangerous things going on in the world and even in her own city.

The sound of an ambulance racing by her apartment building had her throwing her hands over her ears and clamping her eyes shut. She knew she was in sensory overload. With her anxiety as bad as it had been recently, it was bound to show up at some point, but she hated that it was while she was in the one place that was supposed to be her safe space.

Opening her eyes slowly, she looked around and whined as it seemed like every light in the apartment was on, burning her eyes and making her feel like she was overheating.

Tearing off the old sweatshirt of Jay’s that she wore, she walked around her living room while shaking her hands. She was pacing, and though she knew she could call her brothers, she also knew they were both working late that night and opted not to do so.

Another siren went past her building, this time a police cruiser, and Ellie’s ears felt like they would start bleeding at any second. She hurriedly locked herself in her bedroom and jumped into bed, shoving her pillow over her ears. When that didn’t help the noise from getting in, she grabbed the sweatshirt she’d discarded and tied it around her head before slamming the pillow back over her ears.

Now she could drown out all the sounds of the city and rest.

…

Everyone was at Molly’s for the bar’s anniversary party, and it was packed. Ellie hadn’t wanted to go, but she knew that her brothers would bug her until she gave in, so she decided to go for a while.

It was the wrong decision to make.

Like that night in her apartment, every light and noise bothered her. She tapped her nail on her glass as Hailey and Kim spoke about a case they had just finished but stayed quiet.

It wasn’t that she didn’t want to join in, but her anxiety was at an all-time high, and all she wanted to do was go home, pop a Xanax, and sleep away the feeling. She was reminded of her younger years, before Jay and Will had come home, when her father would tell her to get over it and tell her she was too sensitive. She never really paid him much mind, however, as she was always searching for an exit out of wherever they were.

Finally, after two hours of being there, Ellie had had enough. Everyone was packed in too tightly, and the music was too loud. Setting her drink on the table she shared with Jay, Hailey, Will, Kim, and Adam, she spun her head around to search for a way out.

She didn’t hear the voices trying to speak to her until a large hand clamped onto her shoulder, making her jump in the air, her heart beating a mile a minute.

“Ellie? What’s wrong?”

She stared wide-eyed at Jay before spinning and shoving her way unceremoniously through the crowd behind them.

She needed out, and she needed it now.

Everyone at the table stared after her for a second before the boys moved, apologizing to everyone she’d shoved out of the way and following the path she had taken. When they finally got outside, they found her pacing beside the building with her hands shaking.

“Ellie…” Jay tried to get her attention, but she was stuck in her own head.

Will gave his brother a look, and both men blocked her path on either side. Her eyes grew wide as she realized she had no room to move, and her breathing picked up.

“El, it’s okay.” Will’s voice was low and gentle. “Look around you; you’re out of there and out here in the fresh air. Slow your breathing down.”

Her eyes were wide again as she stared at him before trying to take a few breaths. They came out feebly, but they were better than nothing.

“Did you bring your medication?” The redhead asked her and took her purse when she nodded. “May I?”

She nodded again and groaned. “This sucks.”

This time Jay gripped her bicep to help ground her. “Hey, it’s okay. You’re okay.”

Will finally found her medicine and handed her one, but she winced. “I can’t…I don’t have anything to drink.”

Rolling his eyes, Will shared a look with Jay as he headed back for the bar to get her some water as the middle Halstead made her focus on him. “What happened in there?”

She felt her heart start beating painfully again and reached her hand up to grip his. “It was too loud, and there were too many people, and everything was too bright….”

“Hey, it’s okay.” He gripped her tightly and brought her back to him as Will came outside with a glass of water.

“Here. Now take the meds before you make yourself pass out.”

She did as he asked and leaned back against the building, closing her eyes. She knew they were sharing a look, but she didn’t care.

“How long has it been like this?” Will asked her.

She opened her eyes as the roaring in her ears tuned down, and her heart started returning to normal. “Like, how long has it been bad again?” They nodded. “Like two weeks?”

“Why didn’t you call us?” Jay asked, hurt in his voice.

“Because you guys are busy, and you can’t drop everything because I’m nervous about everything under the sun.” She told them. “I’m sorry, you just can’t.”

“But we can try.” Will shook his head. “Have you talked to your therapist?”

She nodded. “My therapist, yes. My psychiatrist, no. We’ve been playing phone tag, and it’s getting annoying. But I’m working on it, and I know now that I can call you, and you’ll get it.”

“Of course, we will,” Jay said earnestly. “You should have told us sooner.”

She shrugged, letting out a cleansing breath. “Well, one thing’s for sure…I’m not going back in there tonight.”

“That’s okay,” Will told her. “I can take you home.”

“You just want to make sure I’m okay tonight, which means the couch is yours.” She joked, knowing he’d insist on staying overnight.

He blushed a little, having gotten caught, but nodded. “Yes, I do worry about you, you know.”

“Thank you.”

[jmagnabo92]

911 Season 8 Ep 1 LR

Going to put this under read more Just In Case 'cause I care about people's rights not to be spoiled.

I know I'm going to hate these scenes with Gerard. I don't want to see this.

LOL - nice mustache.

Athena is PISSED at her new assignment - love it.

Eddie: Don't Jump

Chim: yeah, cause Gerard will make us clean you up from the ground.

WOW GUYS.

Totally called why everyone's playing along. Telling him to just keep his head down instead of PLOTTING TO GET RID OF GERARD.

It's clear Gerard is targeting them for being close to Bobby - specifically Buck, but it makes NO sense that he'd be allowed to.

How has this been going on for three months? No one's talking to Bobby?

Bobby's new Crew - he looks so like... why did the chief send me here?

Glad they didn't get hit, but OMG ALL THE BEES. The guy is like "LET ME IN" - I wouldn't... start of a horror story.

The bees!!!

LOL "Good I forgot to charge my phoe"

"I don't need any of you getting any uglier today". - WOW

OMG it got inside through the vents!!!!

This is going to be in my nightmares.

Bees IN THE THROAT!!!

Oh no!!!!

Love Buck's random info and research helping!!

Love the back and forth with Buck/Maddie and saving the day.

Buck just like picking up a bee and looking at it like a butterfly.

"That was some independent thinking"

"Thank you sir"

"KP duty 1 month." ----- WOW

He literally saved the day....

BEENADO!

This Jenkins storyline is interesting.

Super Swarm!

Killer bees BED DOWN???? LMAO.

Mara seems so happy with Maddie & Chim <3

So.... virtual bday for Christopher?? 14.

He looks so not happy with Eddie but he's got friends!

Aww it's nice that Tommy and Buck were there. Gerard taking credit for Buck's work - Typical asshole boss.

YES, YES, Lady you're an idiot. OMG all those bees napping on her tent.

There's a song about bubble bees in the background of this scene....

"No more freelancing - let the grownups handle this?"

"I have an idea!" - "Am I going to like it" - "Probably not"

LOL this explains Eddie's scene in the trailer! LMAO GOD SPEED DIAZ.

"Why does it have to be me?" - "you're the fastest funner".

Buck's doing well with the ideas this episode.

Seriously DUCK TAPE?

"I was shot before I am pretty sure I can handle this" - "I was talking to the bees" - EDDIES FACE.

LOL Gerard the Buzzkill - Buck was literally just smiling.

ooooh flashbacks to Athena Begins.

Jenkins looked like he was expecting a hug or something.

I wonder if this make Athena realize that she's in Amir's spot from last season.

This is super sus. He's definitely up to something. SOOO Glad Athena was like "You're a dumbass."

You're leaving him in a trunk????? That's NOT LEGAL ATHENA - even if he was a fraud.

This guy is creeping Bobby out for sure. He'd creep me out.

Oh Buck. Broody little pout?

DONT DONT DONT DONT DO IT.

OH wait, still he just save him? Or kill him?

I would've lost it.

NO ATHENA!

Of course, cliff-hanger.

It was so good. :)

[l13bg0tt]

Get to know me!!

thank you to @ep6bastogne and @lovememadly92 for the tags!

NAME:

cameron but call me cammy!!

PRONOUNS:

she/her

STAR SIGN:

scorpio rising, gemini moon, scorpio sun :)

(significantly less mysterious, confident, charismatic etc. than a scorpio is meant to be)

# OF SIBLINGS AND FUN FACTS ABOUT THEM (IF YOU HAVE ANY):

my brother (Sam) is ~8 years older than me and he works for the government and is currently working towards improving the housing crisis in my province!

my sister (Harlee) is ~4 years older than me and we are currently living together while attending school, she is getting training to be a 911 dispatcher!

# OF PETS & THEIR NAMES:

my 13 year old kitty is Joey (a girl!!) and my nearly 4 year old puppy is Otis!

FANDOMS:

Band of Brothers obviously but other than that I would likely only fall under the umbrella of being part of a fandom for TLOU and Harry Potter :)

FAVOURITE COLOUR:

dark green or dark purple... or cornflower blue

FAVOURITE SONG:

don't make me choose pls i violently cycle like 10 songs until i'm tired of em

champagne supernova - Oasis

banana co/no surprises/exit music - Radiohead

my love mine all mine - mitski

FAVOURITE AUTHOR (OF ANYTHING READABLE - BOOKS, FANFICS, ZINES, WEBTOONS, WHATEVER!):

dkm but it is Stephen King by a mile... man can WRITE

FAVOURITE FIC TYPE:

probably enemies to lovers or hurt/comfort. i want emotional damage lmao

FAVOURITE HOLIDAY:

Christmas, but really any one that gives me an excuse to spend heinous amounts of time with my mom

DO YOU HAVE A PARTNER (ROMANTIC, QPR, ANYTHING!)?:

no but i do have an online homoerotic dependency (help) (kidding)

HOBBIES:

antiquing!! also researching/reading and watching movies, but antiquing is quite possibly my favourite activity ever.

FUN FACTS ABOUT ME:

i'll be applying to vet school next year

i have celiac disease (literally not a fun fact at all sorry)

i love pigs so much

some would say i am a horse girl but rather than riding i drive draft horses. wagons and sleighs kinda thing!

i am disgustingly indecisive if you couldn’t tell

tagging: @liptonwashere @hanniewinnix @land-sh @mads-weasley @luckynumber4

sorry if you’ve already done it or been tagged, ignore me!!

[highschoolboi]

Ok I just got put my thoughts about 911 6x17 onto a page before I explode. Heavy spoilers for 6x17!!!!

1. Buck and Natalia situation.

Why is she so pissed off at the fact that buck has dated women before? Yes I know it interrupted their date, so obviously you can be a little annoyed, and she tried to say it in a joking manner, but It really didn't come off like that. It came of like 'you dated other women? How dare you'. And yes his life is messy so it's OK to be overwhelmed by that a bit, but stormy off, and implying that it's completely over for them, at the mere idea of buck being a human with an life outside of her? I instantly thought she didn't like buck, she liked the stories she could get from him about death. As soon as he's anything more than that she bails.

2. The buck and Cameron situation.

As far as I know, they aren't close. Buck and Connor are, but not buck and Cameron so why is she coming to him first and not a close friend, family etc? And they were already weird about the sperm donor situation, so this definitely felt like overstepping of boundaries (addition to this is her just eating the meal he has set out, not even asking if she can have some first). But my main issue with this is where it looks like the writers are heading with this. Cameron and Connor are in a bad spot, and the last scene of buck shows him and her with 'love is in the air' playing in the background, a song they played for the other couples/potentially couples (bobby/athena, hen/karen, chim/mads, /eddie/insulation foam girl), which implies Cameron and buck might become a couple which is just so bad in so many ways. Yes it could just be a scene showing him being gentlemanly, giving her the bed and he takes the couch, bringing her pickles, and maybe him imagining a family of his own (not involving cameron), but with the music it really isn't looking good.

3. Eddie and insulation foam girl.

I forgot her name, I know it's starts with M. They met briefly, once, and I don't remember any chemistry (i barley remember her tbh). And now, with the music, they are implying a potential romance between her and eddie? Feels very rushed, and kind of a last ditch effect because they couldn't think of anything better.

4. The eddie bobby conversation.

I mean it all points to eddie and buck. Buck was the one there to sit with eddie at his lowest moments, buck was the one who always had his back. Making big bobby/Athena and eddie/buck parallels again.

*Also wouldn't of eddie asked buck first to help him build the project? He's always helping chris with school and he built or at least had a hand in building Chris's skateboard, so he has experience with diy. Not that i disliked the eddie + bobby time, it just confused me why it wasn't buck.

5. Eddie and Buck.

Eddie wants to be chosen by a romatic partner, and buck is at an impass where he needs to choose his romantic partner. You can put 2 and 2 together. Buck needs to back away from the Cameron/Connor situation like he did with the chim/mads in Boston situation: he got too involved with someone else's relationship and baby, and he nearly got people hurt/hurt himself, it's the same with the c/c situation now: he's done his part, now he needs to choose to step away. He also needs to choose whether his current(?) relationship with natalia is actually good for him, or whether it will end in hurt just like with his other relationships (hinted at with lucy and taylor). Eddie just wants someone he is already comfortable with, and that he has chemistry with, to make the initiative, he doesn't want to go out searching for love, he wants love to find him: he wants to be chosen.

6. Maddie and Chim.

On a happy note, this was adorable and I love the direction their relationship/dynamic/story is going in. I also really liked the talk mads had with hen: mads came in on offence, but hen handled it, knowing her own intentions were pure, and explained this to Maddie, helping her to work through the fears she had, just like with Chim. I wouldn't mind more hen and Maddie scens in the future, especially considering she is marrying hens best friend.

*Also side note we did not miss the fact that Buck had a ring cutter for 'other things ;)' fanfiction is abundant on the topic of 'other things' and buck.

7. Final odds and ends.

Loved the anniversary talk with Athena and the lady, then with Bobby. Just really sweet and heart-warming. I also saw someone sat that the 4-5 year anniversary they keep bringing up also coincides with how long eddie and buck have known eachother, so there could be a fun Buddy parallel there.

With eddie and tia texting, and the scene cutting to Chris on the laptop, it really looked like Chris was posing as tia, setting eddie up on dates. I assume this isn't what they intended but it was really weird editing and scene choice.

The guy maybe checking out eddie at the golf place, as well as the two women who could be lesbians, was just a real unsubtle hint (hopefully), as well as the general vibe of the sequence where everytime eddie tries to flirt with a woman, something bad happen: stop trying to force this man into a straight relationship, it's clealy ending in disaster each time! /hj

- also the plot thickening on the eddie/Shannon deal. Last episode we learnt that eddie ONLY married her because of Chris, very much implying he maybe didn't actually want to, it's just what he was expected to do, so he did it (comphet much?), and now we learn that eddie didn't even pursue shannon! Clealy she initiated everything, and he just went along with it! If they are not trying to say eddie is bi/gay/didn't like Shannon, then why do they keep framing it that eddie kinda felt forced to go out with Shannon and marry her? (From sociatal expectations, not necessarily forced by shannon herself)

Fin

Thank you if you read this very long rant: I just needed to get my thought down before I exploded form frustration :)

[loveyouanyway]

Hi Nolan!

Edelweiss, ivy, papyrus, and taro! :)

hey saturn <3

edelweiss: how’d you think of your url/username? what’s it associated with to you?

well ofc the buckaroo part is for buck and i love the nickname for him. in fact, i would have named my bunny buckaroo but it didn't suit him so i will name my next pet buckaroo :D

as for the heart part, it's inspired by buck's heart drawing which is so cute and the whole interaction with buck and eddie about it !!!!

ivy: what are your ‘tells’ for your emotions and moods? how can someone tell you’re happy, annoyed, upset or tired?

hmm if im talking a lot and engaging in conversation, im happy. if im picking at my nails, i dont want to be there haha. when im mentally tired, i just shut down and don't talk. i don't think i get annoyed that much bc i just don't care about a lot of things jdksjdf but when i do, i short breathe out of my nose idk if i explained that right and i just look annoyed sdkfjd

papyrus: if you put your ‘on repeat’ playlist on shuffle, what’s the first song that comes up? what do you like about it / associate it with?

ofc it's a reneé rapp song <3 what a shocker!!!!

so what now? oh it always reminds me gallavich (ian and mickey from shameless) idk if any of y'all 911 peeps are in the shameless fandom

it's about an ex coming back to where u live after leaving (for whatever reason) and then wondering so what now? should we talk? and why haven't you called me yet

anyway here is the part where it's not sung but it's like part of the song iykwim

"You dumb crusty ass bitch, but I think I love you. Welcome back to California. I love you. You're so small, I could flick you. I wish I could hug you. I might kiss you, but I also might fight you"

LIKE ITS SO MICKEY TO IAN. I MIGHT MAKE AN EDIT ABOUT IT

taro: if someone called you right now to catch up, what’re the things you’d tell them about?

i would mention that mentally i'm doing a lot better! i would talk a lot about my idea of writing a sitcom inspired by my family

it would be a comedy but have a serious aspect of mental health

characters:

autistic dad and brother who are like on the opposite sides of the spectrum so sometimes they really clash

mom who works in the mental health field (without her, we probably wouldn't live together sjdksd so grateful for her. ily mom)

me, a queer young adult who struggles with depressive and hypomanic episodes

and the star: bernie the bunny!!

i would also catch them up on all the shows ive been watching lately and rant to them about 9-1-1 season 7!!!

[sandalwoodbox]

Vid you're the proudest of?

What are some fandoms and/or ships you'd like to vid for but haven't yet?

Bonus q: Is there a vid that you have watched/rewatched that has inspired you or informed the way you approach your vidding?

Thanks for asking!

(This is part of the Get to know the Vidder ask meme. See all my responses here and feel free to send me asks!)

I think I have to go with Trust+Fall as my top pick at the moment, for two reasons. First, I think it came together really well just as a vid - the audio edits worked out really well and let me structure the vid the way I wanted; I think the faster and faster cutting in the second half is effective in terms of increasing the tension, while still staying parseable (mostly?); and there were just a lot of interesting visuals and parallels to work with from the source, which was satisfying. Second, I was really worried about using a song that already has such an iconic vid associated with it (Parachute by thingswithwings for Leverage), because I wasn't sure if people (including myself) would be able to believe such a different read of the lyrics. Parachute was one of the first songs I thought of for this vid, and then I spent a long time searching for other romcom-type songs that might support a similar comedy -> tragedy read, looking for songs explicitly related to Romeo & Juliet, and even considering whether I could do some kind of mashup where the first half was a romcom song and the second half was a heavier / more tragic song (which I ended up abandoning mostly because all the romcom songs were in major keys and all the tragic songs were in minor keys, who would've guessed.) And in the end I think I managed to make something that's pretty convincing!

2a. Warrior Nun - Ava/Beatrice. I loved this show! It had no right to be any good at all and then it was fucking amazing. Jesus Doesn't Love Me by runawaynun is the vid that got me to watch this show.

2b. 911. I want to make a vid for Taylor (because she's awesome and deserves some spotlight) and I have an idea for a zombie apocalypse AU maybe? It's so many seasons! But hopefully having targeted goals will make it manageable.

2c. Ted Lasso - Roy/Keeley/Jamie. I'm currently rewatching the show with a friend and there's just. So. Much? Of them? They're so much.

Bonus q: MCU Dance Off by lim - the way it uses splitscreen and frame within frame is just mind-boggling to me. I would love to be able to do something like that someday! Also shout out to Candy Girl by vassalady for Princess Princess Ever After which is for a still source but has so much rhythm and movement, and does really cool things in terms of drawing your focus to different parts of an image by only revealing it piecemeal. And finally, 【暗黑向】如果江厌离是反派（不喜慎入）by 王秫秫 for The Untamed, which I think was the first AU vid I saw that really blew my mind, by taking the sweet older sister from The Untamed and portraying her as a poisoner and/or ghost - I think about it a lot in terms of how I can make vids lie to people (in little and big ways) about what happened in canon.

[maygrcnt]

Let’s see the Olivia 911 song list

thank youuuuu for asking i love you!! i know i said five but i didn’t want to stop at five so i did ten. also im gonna try and refrain myself from just saying every song is a buck song but it’s hard

1. Brutal- seasons 1-3 May. I feel like we as a collective don’t talk about the early seasons of may grant enough. she was just a kid! and she was being bullied so bad she thought she didn’t have any way out of it, it’s so heartbreaking. and then she just kept going through stuff in her family life and… i just care for her so much and this is HER song fr.

2. Deja Vu- Buddie. there’s no like actual moment of buddie for deja vu but i just feel like this is what’s going through both of their heads every single time the other person has a date with someone else. like this is the one and only buddie jealousy song to me!

3. Vampire- Buck/abby. like i’m sorry you can’t convince me buck abby was an ethical relationship and im NOT talking about the age gap even though that’s the main point of this song. like she got his info in a sketchy way and then basically used him to help her heal until she was ready to move on but then didn’t even have the guts to do an actual breakup and left the kid hanging for months. call me a bitch but i feel very comfortable saying she sucked so much of his energy and life. it took two full seasons for him to fully find closure from that while she had started a whole new life! :/

4. Stranger- Buck/abby again lol. this is like the other side of that argument where it’s like, buck was totally crushed but now in season seven who the fuck cares about her! she’s just a stranger now! and the lyric “you are the best thing i keep so far out of my life” is very them. because she did change his outlook on life in MANY ways but his healing from her was the best thing he could have ever done.

5. logical & enough for you- maddie. my heart breaks listening to these songs from a maddie perspective. thinking about how long she suffered and dealt with so much she didn’t deserve,,, these are the best songs for her imo especially the lyric “one day i’ll be everything for somebody else” because she is she really is! and she’s getting married to the person who looks at her like she hung the moon and i love her!!!

6. Making the bed- eddie, specifically pre canon eddie. idk how to explain this one but it’s very much just the idea of him getting back to his son realizing how shit things are and being like … i had a part in making this problem and now i need to fix my shit. and then he did!

7. 1sf3sb- henren in the early seasons/precanon. the cheating storyline is one of my least favs but i love how they showed them rebuilding from it and coming back even stronger. but in the midst of it all this song is truly very them from karen’s perspective. she was valid for everything during that time btw karen is a literal saint for her patience.

8. boahsg- ravi, our little clumsy socially awkward darling

9. Love is embarrassing- Bisexual buck!!!!!! this is my fav liv song and it’s so buck it’s not even funny. the anthem for the give more than they get hopeless romantics oh god i love him and it became way way more buck when he kissed a man who’s kind of a loser. i bet he’s planning out his wedding with a guy he’s never marrying right now!

10. finally, the newest addition to my list and the most important in my mind: Scared of my guitar the most buddie song to ever buddie (other than good luck babe). I love this song so much coming from the perspective of them literally not being able to lie to each other but they can lie to significant others like it’s nothing. oh there’s so much good stuff in there it’s amazing.

thank you for letting me do this anon ily

[paperstorm]

10 random lines

I am LATE but I was tagged by @cinnaluminum @reyesstrand and @rmd-writes

Rules: pick any 10 of your fics, scroll somewhere to the midpoint, pick a line (or three), and share it! Then tag 10 people.

He tastes like mint. Must’ve chewed some gum or a Tic-Tac before coming over to ask TK to dance, and TK resolutely sets that information down and doesn’t pick it up again because if he has to think about there being intention in the way this man approached him, he might have to stop kissing him. Back to the habit after kicking it (911 Lone Star)

“Dude, I was born in Manhattan,” TK defends. “Lived there my whole life until three months ago. Nobody I grew up with knows how to drive, having a car on the island makes no sense unless you’re super rich or have some kind of kink for sitting in traffic for an hour to go 10 blocks.” Life's a game of inches (911 Lone Star)

Merlin seeks Arthur’s lips for a messy kiss, tilting his hips to change the angle and pushing Arthur inside just a bit deeper, rubbing, sending resplendent waves of pleasure through him. He wants so badly – aches, really – to be everything Arthur could ever need so Arthur never has to look anywhere else. Golden Hour (Merlin)

“I couldn’t remember every kiss, not 800 years of them, but I remember that one,” Joe continues, in a dreamy voice. He is more emotional than Nicky. Quicker to anger, and indignance, and ferociously protective of those he loves. His fire burns quick and hot, and when it melts into languid moments such as this, where he’s introspective and soft-hearted, it’s Nicky who aches to protect him. Nothing But a Song (The Old Guard)

Nile surprises them with her poker skills, in the evening when Joe breaks out a pack of cards and they sit around the table with an old radio on in the background. The nights were long and boring, sometimes, when she was stationed overseas, and she took a considerable amount of money off all her commanding officers in the months she was there. It’s that baby face, one of them had complained, you never think it’s lying to you until it is. Hands Battered but Hearts Survive (The Old Guard)

They struggle to pay the bills and sometimes they run out of hot water before both of them have had a chance to shower and they have to hide their love away to keep it safe from people who would want to hurt them if they knew, but despite all that, they’re happy. It aches and it aches and it aches in Bucky’s chest to think of how much he took it for granted, how many times he should have told Steve he loved him but didn’t, how likely it is that they’ll never have that again. Bucky’s not as simple as he’s been pretending. He doesn’t believe the advertisements, the campaigns that promise they’ll be gone six months and home as heroes by Christmas. That’s what they said last time, and millions never came home. Parallel Sinking Ships (MCU)

Steve sways a little on his feet as Bucky works, and Bucky sees the crash coming. Steve must have been running on sheer adrenaline since the end of their latest mission, perhaps spurred on by grief over the people he hadn’t been able to save this time and anger at himself for his perceived failings. He’d managed to get himself to Wakanda and to Bucky on nothing but leftover fumes, and they’re very quickly running out. Through the Monsoon (MCU)

“Do you want to know the moment I hated myself the most, in all this?” Nick asks. Pieces of himself, he figures. He knows better than anyone how tough it is to be so see-through. To know that despite all his best efforts, he’s utterly transparent. Maybe he can be transparent on purpose; maybe that will make Charlie feel safer in the notion of confessing. All Of These Moving Parts (Heartstopper)

Sitting here, holding TK’s arm in his hand, he feels like he can sense TK slipping away right here in front of him, filtering through his fingers like sand. No matter how he tries, Carlos can’t seem to grasp him tight enough to keep him. And maybe that’s always been the problem. Maybe he’s never known how to do that. Collateral damage (911 Lone Star)

“If we’re playing around, if we’re having fun and you want me to be a little rough that’s fine. I love that, too. Not when you’re this upset. I can’t …” He runs out of ways to explain the way that makes him feel, to imagine being rough with TK while he’s crying and using the mix of pleasure and pain to distract himself from his grief. Of him associating Carlos with hurt in a moment like this, of him believing he doesn’t deserve to be treated gently, maybe because someone died while TK was there and in the dark recesses of his mind he thinks he should be punished for that. Silent (911 Lone Star)

I'm not sure who's done this already but I will tag @musette22 @riricitaa @bubblesandroses8 @chaotictarlos @theghostofashton and @tailoredshirt