#i came up with this because it's something i would most definitely do
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autumngracy · 22 hours ago
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Where I live is really weird because it pretends at being a functional village/town but it's really just a hopelessly parasitic growth on the local tourist attraction that would shrivel up and die on its own.
There's one place in town that sells fresh produce and "fresh" is stretching it because they have so many refrigerator issues that I cannot trust anything. Also their prices are insane, because no one is competing with them. Same issue with the guy that owns the only two gas stations in town.
There is a commisary on the military base next door that has fresh food, but you need to be active military or their family (or a veteran) to buy anything there (even civilian Dept. of Defense employees aren't allowed to shop there.)
There's only like one street in town that has shops or restaurants and it's super short. Due to the catastrophic storm damage last year, the two main historic restaurants there have permanently closed.
It's just shitty, overpriced hole in the wall type restaurants left now. And the ones that aren't overpriced have very questionable food health/safety situations. Some are so small they don't even have any dining space. And absolutely none of the restaurants anywhere in town will do delivery, but we're so far from any other areas that none of the restaurants anywhere else will deliver here either.
There are several restaurants on the base (mostly fast food) but you need to have a base pass to get in and most people in town don't bother and have no idea what's even in there.
Technically the area is walkable, but many parts are not pedestrian friendly, with a lot of blind curves, random speed limit changes, no sidewalks, and very little road shoulder. If you ride a bike you pretty much HAVE to ride it in the street because there's no bike lanes. Because some people ride in cycling teams here, they take up the whole, single lane.
There are a few car dealerships, a dentist, a clinic, a pharmacy, a car wash ... but they barely survive here.
There's no public transit here (just a shuttle that goes around the military base) but we get clogged with tourist busses for said base all the time and it's a total nuisance. There's also very little parking here and much of it is paid parking.
The nearest hospital is the one on the military base but it's not like, a real hospital?? And they won't let civilians (even government workers) use it. They don't really do any specialized stuff there and they aren't really equipped to handle emergencies.
Case in point, one time I tried to take my bleeding coworker to the ER there, which was super hard to find, and there was no one there—not in the waiting room or at the desk. After like 10 minutes a guy who was clearly supposed to manning the desk came out of a back room and was surprised to see us there; he appeared to have just been chatting with some other guys. When asked for help he seemed ... confused? Like he didn't know what to tell us or how to handle the situation.
So if you're dying of a heart attack or something, REALLY the only hospital you can actually USE is like ... an hour away.
To really do anything at all you need to drive at least 20-30 minutes over the mountains (and probably pay bridge tolls) because the entire area is a complete nothing burger with almost no services or shops (definitely no entertainment) and no sense of community.
Technically there's a rail system nearby but the one on our side is freight only; to use the passenger one you gotta drive over the river, pay the bridge toll, pay to park your car, and pay for a ticket/pass. And then it's 1.5 hours the nearest proper city. And you needed a car to do it all anyway.
“America IS walkable, you’re all just lazy” my childhood home was an hour from the nearest hospital (by car)
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golden-redhead · 46 minutes ago
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I think there's a lot of signs pointing to Jayce actually doing the right thing ...or at least the right thing based on the information available to him at the time.
We can't know for a fact just how much Viktor was changed and what his healing was doing to the people who came to him in the long run, but considering all the hints dropped by the writers, the situation is much less clear than we think. Obviously, everyone's first instinct is to condemn Jayce and his actions, especially because Viktor is one of fan favourites, but looking at the teaser for the next Act and what little we know about what happened to Jayce, I think it might have been necessary evil.
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I think this scene of Viktor temporarily 'possessing' Salo in order to talk with Jayce points to just how fucked this little community that Viktor created actually is. There's a reason why everyone's getting those 'it's a freaking cult' vibes.
This scene made me more uncomfortable than anything else this season and I think it's clear that it was meant to make feel that way. There's something so uncanny about Viktor's voice coming out of Salo's mouth, especially paired with that look on his face and how Viktor seems to be able to see and experience things through him in this moment.
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And then there's also the issue of all these people dying a horrible drawn-out death as soon as Viktor himself 'dies'. Yes, they came to him on their own, they asked to be healed, but did they really know what they are getting into? Did they know this is what might happen?
Some of them were already dying, true, but Viktor healed all kinds of people, some of whom most likely had their whole lives ahead of them. He, knowingly or not, inevitably sped up this process. Not all of them were consummed by Shimmer-addiction or permanently disabled like Salo.
And then there's also the fact of all of them basically abandoning their previous lives to serve Viktor and his community. Which, okay, makes sense, there's certainly a parallel with the community that Ekko created for Zaunites to keep them safe from Piltover and Silco's plans. They made an informed choice, though, and I don't think the same can be said about Viktor's cult-like commute.
They seem peaceful, yes, but also devoid of personality and entirely dedicated to Viktor and his cause. Of course, it can be explained by gratitude towards him and desire to be kept safe in a calm and peaceful environment, but it's taken to such an extreme point that it definitely crosses the line into uncanny territory in my eyes. Their hivemind behaviour is very unsettling and even though Viktor seems to frame his recent actions as some kind of greater good, I don't think it's necessarily true.
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We have yet to find out what Jayce saw and who's in the right and who's in the wrong. Either way, as usual when it comes to Arcane, it seems to me that more than ever, everyone's a victim of the circumstances and tragedy spares no one.
Considering that Viktor is set up to be 'reborn', I can't help but wonder what it means for his community and if they will also be brought to life by whatever connection they have with him. It would be a fascinating choice given how Viktor's arc has always been about autonomy and making your own choices.
Arcane, it's been a pleasure having my heart torn out of my chest by you. Can't wait for the last Act.
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goldengamer2500 · 1 hour ago
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Oh, oh, this seems like the perfect post to rant about my trans dreams as well!
I only realized that i might be trans at the start of this year, but since then I've had a handful of dreams where something happened that definitely wasn't cis.
Sorry in advance for the wall of text.
These dreams are more-or-less in chronological order:
In one dream I was hanging out with some friends that i haven't seen in YEARS and at one point we took a picture together and one of my friends commented something among the lines of "Wow, you almost look like a girl in this picture" and i remember that in my dream i thought "Oh yeah, I haven't told them yet! should I tell then that I'm..." then the conversation got derailed and the dream went in a completely different direction but i know what I was about to say in that moment.
In another dream i remember that me and my family had moved to another state or... something like that? I don't remember the exact details but we were somewhere-I-didn't-know and we didn't have any of our stuff so we had to go to a nearby store to buy a change of clothes and stuff. I don't know what came over me in that dream but out of everything in the store I specifically picked a frilly lilac blouse and skirt (yes, I vividly remember what i wore, they were a matching set too lmao). I then remember how I was nervously trying to come up with an excuse to tell my parents (and my grandma, who was also there for some reason????) but sadly I don't remember how the conversation turned out.
In a different dream I was at my childhood home and for whatever reason I was inside the room that used to belong to my parents trying out some dresses (don't remember if they were mine or my mother's, but it doesn't matter) and at some point my dad was calling me over for dinner or something, and despite how much I told them not to come into the room they still managed to open the door (that door actually had a problem with the lock IRL) and they saw me in a dress, I remember that i got angry at them and yelled a lot at them but I don't remember how they reacted in that dream.
There's another dream which I only have very vague memories of, but I remember that at some point I had an argument with my grandma (who keeps showing up in these kinds of dreams for some reason??) about... something stupid probably? but I remember that after the argument I thought to myself "Was that a good enough girl voice? I didn't think I could keep it up during an argument..." Curiously I remember that my voice did sound different in that dream. I also haven't started voice training yet and I thought that was funny detail.
In arguably the most obvious trans dream I had I was camping with some of my old friends (I think in the dream it was supposed to be like a school trip because they were my friends from middle-school) and at some point we all returned to the lodge or wherever where we were staying and I went to take a shower. I remember looking at myself in the mirror and, well it wasn't exactly a girl's body but I would definitely describe my reflection as androgynous, much more feminine than my real body. Funnily enough I remember how I was so shocked and happy by this that I actually had to check if I still had that thing (Sadly I still had it but I find it hilarious that I had to make sure even in a dream). Another stupid detail from this dream is that later on that same dream we noticed that they had an Xbox on the lodge and me and my friends hooked it up and started playing Guilty Gear Strive. I, of course, picked Bridget. (The trans girl character for those that do not know. Curiously she's a DLC character which I don't own yet so I haven't used her IRL. I remember commenting about this on the dream)
And while this is not reduced to a specific dream, I recently made a trans flag armband/bracelet using some colorful hair ties that i stole from my mum and I've been using it in my room or whenever I go out without my parents. Well, I've noticed that in most of my recent dreams I'm wearing this armband, so that's that.
Sorry for the rant but I've been thinking about these dreams for a while now and I just had to tell somebody about them. :3
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Dreaming
This is actually a dream I had a few weeks ago. Ever since I realized I was trans last year, I've been getting more and more dreams (which I remember) where I'm, you know, physically a girl, but this was the first outright "trans" dream. Hope I can make it a real one eventually
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ferg0s · 1 day ago
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Nanase being infatuated by his pink lock partner not cuz he’s like weirdo but because he think she’s so fucking cool. You’re a little flustered by the compliments and praise he gives you for literally breathing. It feels like showing a toddler the most basic magic trick the way his eyes light up and the smile spreads across his face.
“I’m so buzzed!” He exclaims as the two of you make your way on the field. You promised you’d show him your direct shot, and teach him how to do it, and you were sure that he didn’t sleep all night due to the excitement. He was a breath of fresh air in the other wise bleak program. Bluelock was filled with people who would sell your soul for a grain of rice - if they had any respect for you, other wise it would be for free - so his general cheery attitude had you smiling for the first time in weeks.
“Okay-“ you sigh, using the helm of your shirt to wipe your sweat off. “Again.” You instruct as you two get ready to run through the drill again. Him trying to copy what you had showed him and you trying to block him. It was more beneficial to you than him, because explaining the moves to him made you understand the process better and then executing it made you perfect any mistakes.
When the spandex finally came in, you wouldn’t admit it, but you were nervous as fuck. Being surrounded by all the pretty and literal definition of peak female athletic physique has you second guessing yourself as you look at your self in the bathroom mirror. This was such a stupid thing to get hung up on, but with the overall anxiety and self doubt that lingered in bluelock, body dysmorphia wasn’t something unexpected. You convinced your self not to crawl back in the old frumpy uniform by remembering how much you sweat it in, and decided to prioritize not getting a heat stroke over your anxiety. You could cry about it later.
You hoped it wouldn’t be that much of a distraction, maybe if you acted like everything was fine it would-
“WOOOOW!”
You cringed at the sound of Nanase as he walked up behind you. “I didn’t know you had so much muscle-“ he said cheerfully. It was so stupid. Such a small compliment - coming from a man who had more muscle than you could ever have- ogling at your biceps and asking you to flex. You came to hate how he could turn your mood around.
“You look like a Micheal Angeles statue!”
“It’s Michelangelo , Nanase.”
“Oh.”
That stupid himbo had your heart.
When it came time for selection for the U-20 team, the men went first. You crossed your fingers and hoped that Nanases name would be mentioned, glancing over at him with a smile before it began. Looking over in concern when his name didn’t come up. He looked dejected, rightfully so. But when it came turn for the woman’s U-20, and your name was one of the first to be called - you froze. Oh my god, this was your dream.
You seemed to freeze up, only coming to when you felt someone wrap their arms around you and pull you into a hug.
“Oh my god!” Nanase exclaimed. “I’m so proud of you!” He pulled away from you and smiled looking down at you. It took you a minute to realize what was happening. Had he walked across the room to come congratulate you? You could see the remnants of tears in his eyes - no doubt from the crushing news he’d just received, but despite that he has a smile on his face, looking down at you with no joy. No malice, no jealousy. Just… pure happiness.
You felt your eyes tear up, it had been so long since you had heard that. It broke your heart to see that he didn’t get selected, you had seen first hand how capable he was, but regardless, he seemed to focus on your victories rather this his failure.
As he began to blabber about how ‘buzzed’ he was that he’d get to see you play on the big screen, you just looked up at him with a smile on your face. Wondering how your kids would look like, because goddamn… you’re head over heels for this guy.
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tiredistic · 22 hours ago
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Can you please do one where Janis gets headaches every day and Regina can’t make her feel better because nothing works? (I’m fs not projecting at all)
No Nurse?
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Paring: Regina x Janis
Warnings: Sick fic, sorta. Just fluff
Summary: Janis had really bad headaches, and Regina decides to help her out
A/n: This was so cute anon, if you are still having headaches hope you feel better soon!
It was the end of the day as Janis and Regina sat at their usual spot at the back of the class.
Regina tapped her pen on her desk mindlessly as Janis was practically going insane.
With every tap it drove deeper and deeper into her head, the teacher's boring grainy voice wasn't helping either.
Regina didn't seem to notice until Janis was face down in her hands, her chest rising and sinking rapidly.
"Janis? Janis are you good?" Regina asked quietly, making sure the teacher didn't notice them.
When Regina got no answer from the girl she took it upon herself to ask for help.
Raising her hand boldly, in the middle of the lesson wouldn't be a resort most people would do, but this was her girlfriend we're talking about.
"...Yes, George?" The teacher sighed pinching his brows as if he was teaching anything actually relevant.
"i'm taking Janis to the nurse."
"Now that's not really a question is it?"
"I was going to do it either way, just look at her somethings clearly wrong."
"Whatever. Just go, be quick." He said waving his hand dismissively.
Quicky, Regina gathered her and Janis's bags, making sure to pack up because she knew she wasn't going to be comeing back.
She easily picked up the unwell girl, being that their sizes contrasted so much.
She quickly moved from the class, making her way to the exit.
"I thought we were going to the nurse?" Janis werealy asked, so softly that Regina almost didn't hear.
"They're not going to do shit but give you an ice pack. We're going to my place. Care to tell me what's gotten into you? Why'd we have to leave class so suddenly?"
"don't act like you didn't want to leave." Janis let out a small laugh but winced instantly from the pain in her head, "I just have a really bad recurring headache."
Regina bit back her words as she thought of what to say next. they approched the car and she laid Janis down in the passenger seat, before getting in herself.
"Are you like sick?"
"No."
"Water, have you been drinking water?"
"Yes, plenty"
sleep have you been sleeping?
Yes, yes yes, I've been doing everything I had to do! I don't know where it came from I just need it to disappear before my test on Friday!
Regina let Janis calm herself down, they were close to the house now.
After Janis's breathing was back to normal and her eyebrows weren't creased she spoke up, "It's stress Janis. Your too stressed out."
Janis laid there listening to Regina's words carefully.
She was entirely too tired and annoyed to listen. She shut her eyes, and much to her surprise, fell asleep.
Regina pulled up to her house parking slowly and making sure it didn't stop to abruptly to wake the girl.
She collected their stuff as she opened the front door making a clear path to carry Janis from her car to her bedroom.
When janis's head hit that soft silk pillow it was like the stars aligned. the weight and the stress almost forgotten.
Regina shuffled around for a while before returning to Janis. A choice of tea or water, and a snack was presented to her.
After a while, Janis definitely started to feel better. Her headache lifted and her girlfriend in her arms. It was calm after the storm.
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durtystars · 2 days ago
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i agree with a lot, heavily on the fact that he was a good leader. one of the biggest arguments against him is that "he would get everyone killed" but.....he was already taking care of an entire group of people that were nearly 12 in number (if not that number in the first place) well before rick came into the picture. that reddit post could be right regarding the show, but the comic creator said that rick was asleep for an entire month (if not, i know it was said somewhere regarding the timeline of twd video games) so even if the show wanted to backtrack and say shane was a bad leader, they already showed literally in the first two episodes that start it off that he's not. in addition, if you read the official TV scripts of S1, in the scene of them in front of the lab and they don't have an answer after knocking on the door, daryl says "Everything was fine until this guy showed up." one of the weirdest and hardest things in twd to understand and accept was rick's sudden transferal of leadership, as if the group knew and trusted him better than shane the entire time. and during this time, rick is making horrible mistakes. but if you look in the deleted scenes of S1, rick heavily relies on shane for guidance on what to do, which ACTUALLY makes sense. i have no idea why these scenes were deleted. even if they were cut for time, they could have made some other scenes in S2 to show the rick/shane dynamic.
i don't agree that shane lied about rick. for one thing it doesn't make sense for him to save his life at the chance that he can come back and then lie about it, and as for why he never cleared it up is because he knew how bad it looked regardless, so he didn't bother. and of course as his character is deeply sensitive he was too ridden with guilt for loving lori so he let her believe it to make it easier to cut her out of his life.
i'm glad you brought up that shane always had rick's back. even in the scene when he had his gun pointed at him, i interpret it in the sense of him thinking of offing him because he's simply to weak for this world, but he couldn't bring himself to do it. i defend lori and give her a LOT of slack, but it must have been a special tormenting hell for him to face rick and her never supporting him when all he wanted was everyone to be safe. the rest of the group was affecting him as well, but lori and rick are something special to him, of course.
in my first watch (i think it was around covid days), i completely agreed with shane and was absolutely blown away that everyone was treating him like he was crazy. this was during the last stutter of the era of hating S2 as it was regarded as the most boring season, so when i looked around online to see if i was crazy i wasn't met with anything of the contrary. nowadays, S2 has been regarded in a much better light and has been for at least the past 2 years and while shane was always popular you definitely see more support of him in the ways of YT videos, and even if there's no support it's still in the breakdown of his character because he truly has so much to give as he is and through jon's performance.
i always say that while i believe S1 to be a masterful display of TV, S2 is the one that really brings out the discussion with the viewers. you said you couldn't watch shane's death scene, on my first time i couldn't either. i had no idea he even died because i was so outraged he was being isolated the way he was. i literally skipped up to the end of the episode because i was so adamant on his obvious road to death. so instead i turned all the way back to 2x1 and asked my mother to watch it with me, just to see how crazy i really was. that's why i say S2 is the one that actually brings out real discussion. my mother did agree with me, but we still had interesting conversations while watching it. i told her that she didn't need to watch the rest of the show with me, but she decided to stay for the rest of the journey (now she's watched the entire show and almost all the spinoffs and it's completely in love with the daryl show). but the thing is, as some of these things will go, my mother was telling what happened with me to my father, and so she convinced him to also watch S2, for which he stayed with for 6 more seasons. S1 is the one that pulls you in, but S2 is the one that makes you stay. and you are not going to convince me that it's not because of anything other than shane's character and jon's performance. we talk of shane very casually in the twd fandom, but in the outside of things he's a character that died in the second season of a 10+ season show and was barely mentioned again. and yet in this context, he's THE most talked about and relevant character in the franchise. the twd creator just talked about making a comic prequel surrounding him, lori and carl this year as well. no other character died as early as he did and have remained at such an impactful level, not a single one comes close.
now, me and my mother still rewatch S2, and find new realizations about his character. S2 is the most viewed, most rewatched and most discussed season in my house. every single time, it's brutal to see shane's degradation. and yet he became the groundwork of the show. he also still lives on in the characters. rick, daryl, carol and maggie are alive because of him. whether the writers mean it, whether the actors mean it or not, they have manifested his harsh way of living within them one way or another. and yes, carl is gone but he's still worth a mention as he voiced his mourning of him and how much he missed him. yes, i would prefer if shane stayed alive for at least one more season. but it's his leaving the show so soon that shows how much his presence stayed deep in the cracks of the show.
I’d love to hear your thoughts on why Shane is the best character in TWD 😊
Cause he's my baby and he's hot and I love him and that's good enough of a reason 😂 
But if you want something more logical, perhaps for a lot of reasons people tend to overlook… First, something that always bugs me is how little acknowledge there is of him actually stepping into the role of a leader for months before Rick showed up. As far as I know, no one in that group stepped in like he did. For the few interactions we saw, everyone would come to him for answers, and while he wasn’t always very diplomatic, he had good survival instincts and kept the group safe for months. Perhaps staying at the quarry wouldn’t have worked in the long run, but it was a plan nonetheless. 
He was right most of the time. He figured out pretty quickly how things were after the infection, and adapted a new mindset. He had to make tough decisions nobody was ready for yet, and maybe he pushed too hard instead of giving people time to get into that same headspace. And we see in later seasons that almost everyone thinks in a similar way Shane did, they just have different approaches. 
and it keeps going under the cut...
I recently saw a timeline in a subreddit or somewhere else that said the events from season 1 and 2 happened in the span of 2 or 3 weeks and that's crazy to me. So they were seemingly doing good, and they found Rick, everyone automatically herd to him, and everything until that point didn’t really matter anymore. That really pisses me off that he was just killed a few weeks later because they couldn’t sit down and talk things over. All and that, and despite him being driven for his misplaced love for Lori, he was still loyal to Rick in his own way. Did he question Rick’s leadership? Yes, countless times. Did he also follow his lead every single time? Also yes.
Which leads me to my next point. He also kept Rick safe. In the hospital flashback, he went in and saw what was happening and amidst all the chaos he still tried to get him out. When he couldn't, he did the only thing he could, he locked the door and barricade it. Did he know that would keep him safe? Probably no. He had absolutely no idea, but he was driven by getting them all out, and when he couldn’t get him out, he did the best he could to get Lori and Carl out of town. If he hadn't lied about Rick, Lori wouldn’t have agreed to leave him behind. Again, tough situations led to hard decisions.
And one of the hardest decisions he made was killing Otis to save Carl. He didn’t murder him in cold blood, he was with him until the end, killing him wasn’t something that crossed his mind until the very last second when he had no choice. If he hadn’t, Carl wouldn’t have gotten the care he needed. BUT people tend to paint him as a murderer for shooting him in the leg. It wasn’t right, but it was the only way out at that moment. I recently revisited one of my fics and wrote that Shane sacrificed his soul to saved Carl that day and I still agree with that. I don’t think he purposely hurt someone before unless he was defending himself. And from that moment on, you could see it changed him and didn’t know how to deal with that, which led him to his own demise.
Was he an asshole sometimes? Yes. Did he do or say things in a way I didn’t agree with? Yes. Did I ever want to slap him? Many times. But there was something about him, compared to other antagonists later on the show, that made him more realistic to me. He wasn’t driven by wanting to be right all the time or even being the leader. His misguided love for Carl and Lori, was at its core the things that he cared the most about and that he wanted to protect at all costs. And while I cared for neither, I think it was beautiful of him. 
I can never watch his last moments. For me, he got the right idea at the beginning of season 2 when started considering leaving the group on his own. I wish he had done that, even if that meant leaving the show. 
I’m probably forgetting something here cause I haven’t rewatched in years, but I think that’s it. Like I’ve said, I didn’t pay much attention to him the first time around, I did agree with him most of the time, it was his manners that left a lot to be desired. It wasn’t until my love for Frank got me to go back and watch some of his previous performances that I got to see Shane in a new light. 
In conclusion, he’s still the best character to me, and everyone should love him like I do. Or not. More Shane for me if you don’t. 
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bunnyboy-juice · 26 days ago
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spent the first hour and change at work deleting some old files and am having a grand ol time laughing at myself for not realizing i was a lesbian sooner
#vulnerable tag rambles ahead please be kind abt them i didnt intent to ramble this much but i dont wanna delete it eitehr#me to every single man i have ever dated after 6mo-1y: yeah hey this really isnt working out i dont really know why but i really hate mysel#and i dont want to blame you because i dont think you did anything inherently wrong here; i think this is something about me but i need#space to figure out why im feeling this way [every single one reacted by telling me No i wasnt allowed to leave btw]#i hold very complex feelings about these relationships esp bc of them ending in very violent/chaotic ways most of the time#but its interesting to look back at it all and realize ive left every man for the same reason (which is that ive hated myself Every Single#Time ive dated a man) and its funny bc i recognized the self hate pretty early on w/ cishet men but when it came to queer men it was#much more confusing (esp w/ nto knowing Any lesbians at that point in my life). im so happy im a lesbian tbh#i have a lot of issues w/ the racism fatphobia and transmisogyny present in lesbian groups#and also coming out as a lesbian really truly saved my life. before i met my wife i was quite literally in a 3yr abusive relationship that#definitely would have died in if i hadnt realzied i was a lesbian and ran from him#its also weird seeing liek the hard evidence of the things that happened to me btween 2016-2020 tbh#cause that was such a bad time of my life. i truly dont know how i survived it but im so glad i did#like the three major relationships in my life b4 meeting my wife was: guy who was in college when i was in HS who stalked me when i left;#guy who was a year younger than me who cheated on me the entire time while telling me he was being victimized (he wasnt; this was very mess#guy who saw the very messy toxic ldr i was in and helped me dump my ex then decided that meant we were in a relationship [insert 3 yrs here#and admittedly all 3 years with him werent the same level of abusive but it was definitely unhealthy from the start considering I Didnt Kno#we were together until he wanted to celebrate vday and got mad i didnt know our anniversary - and like this isnt including the other stuff#that happened between those Relatonships[tm] (cause ive never been monogamous; these were just the Major Relationships)#like i genuinely think if i hadnt come out i'd be dead rn given just how dangerous my relationships were/continued getting#i am also so tired now that ive seen all this cause like. fuck i can barely believe it and i not only lived it but have PTSD about it#i should write about my life sometime. i feel like it'd be cathartic to try and make a tangible timeline and stories from the years ang stu#anyway yeah. be nice about the tag rambles. dont message me with pity or curiosity or anything about this. i dont usually talk abt this stu#publicly bc i hate the ways ppl start tryign to baby me when they realize my life has been extremely fucked up until only a few years ago#n im still working on accepting kindness from others bc of [insert life traumas here] but its a long process so pls respect my need for jus#being heard rn w/o too much pressure< 3 (but ig if u do read this can u like it cause i feel a little crazy seeing all the evidence of the#stuff i experienced now also cause fuck ik logically it was but also i cant believe it was all real still yk)
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cuteniaarts · 3 months ago
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What if… Suiren in Vaatu’s colours 😳👀
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#my art#artists on tumblr#the legend of korra#avatar suiren au#original character#sotrl suiren#Kat once said. and I quote – ‘Suiren would look really good with Vaatu’s colours. you can’t argue because I’m right’#so here I am. not arguing and instead giving the people what they want#because SHE DOES look good in Vaatu’s colours#don’t get me wrong I love her in her usual blue. but the red & black just does something to my brain#lmao I’m picturing her fusing with Vaatu and getting like a magical girl transformation 😂😂😂#okay not really but. if Vaatu could fuse with Unalaq to become… whatever the fuck that thing that sometimes appears in my nightmares was#then he could definitely dye her dress a different colour if he wanted to. okay? okay#and he’d zap her fire nation bracelet into a water tribe one bc it’s important to balance the colour scheme 😤#(for the record this wouldn’t actually happen in universe I’m just messing around)#this AU is just way too fun to play around with. yes I will make my already badass OC into an overpowered Mary Sue who replaces the mc#what are you gonna do about it?#I can’t stop drawing stuff for it#focusing literally only on the fun silly goofy parts because there’s enough heavy stuff in other verses AND irl already#maybe I just want family shenanigans mixed in with a rewrite of LoK’s shitty politics? have you ever thought about that?#is that such a crime?#and most of all. this makes me happy and I like to indulge in it. and enjoying creating is already so rare for me#so as long as this AU keeps being enjoyable for me I’m gonna keep at it no matter what anyone says#avatar suiren is my little self indulgent concept that I came up with when I was 13 and waited far too long to do something with#so now I’m making up for all those years#sue me :)#(is it just me or have I been saying ‘sue me’ way too much recently. idk. my mom’s a lawyer* that porbably has something to do with it)#(*has a law degree but never once used it. why the fuck would she get one when she already has an accountant’s degree? hell if I know)#anyway random side ramble about my mom’s life story aside#what colour do you think a balanced avatar’s eyes would turn when they go into the avatar state?
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cinnamorollcrybaby · 2 months ago
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Career Day
Tags: teeth rotting fluff, crack, jjk men as dads / fem!reader
An: Your child comes home and says tomorrow is career day at their school. They want to bring you and their daddy to school to show off how cool you two are, but.. their dad doesn’t exactly have the most conventional job.
SATORU • SUGURU • TOJI • SUKUNA
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SATORU
“My daddy is the strongest!” Your son explains to a room full of his peers. Satoru is proudly beaming next to him. You note how much they look alike. The white hair, the bright blue eyes. Your son looks like he came straight from Satoru and had nothing to do with you.
But your son, Aoi, definitely had your personality.
“Nuh uh. He can’t be the strongest. Superman’s the strongest!” Another kid protested with an unconvinced frown.
“Well, my daddy is like superman!” Aoi retorts, keeping his headstrong personality like his mama. “Actually, he’s even better than superman!”
“He’s not even wearing a suit!” A different child speaks up. You share a nervous glance with Satoru. He’s enjoying this all too much.
“He doesn’t need a suit to be the strongest, dumbass!” Your sweet boy yells, and you promptly cover his mouth. Satoru is laughing his ass off, making the entire situation worse.
Correction, Aoi trying out his dad’s signature hand signal and saying “domain expansion” made the entire situation so much worse.
“You’re grounded, Aoi. You can’t say those things to other people. It’s rude and hurtful.” You say as you and Satoru walk your young boy home. Aoi lets out a small frustrated groan.
“I’m still getting him ice cream.” Satoru interjects with a proud smile. “My boy tried to cast his first domain at just six-years-old. He deserves a sweet treat.” Two wide smiles look up at you, and you realize you’re outnumbered here. Rolling your eyes, you nudge Satoru.
“I want a girl next.”
SUGURU
Mimiko and Nanako begged Suguru to come to their school’s career day. He was of course hesitant to do so, given that Jujutsu sorcery was still a hidden art in Japan. He didn’t exactly know how to explain his career to a bunch of kids.
He had a plan though. He would just tell the children that he was a preacher at a church. It’s not… completely a lie. He was a leader for.. a type of church.
You and Geto walk into the cozy looking classroom and see a load of other parents there. Your husband grimaced at the thought of having to interact with all these… people.
You give Suguru a reassuring squeeze of the hand. “It’ll be okay. Anything for the girls, right?” You whisper into his ear, making him nod. Anything for the girls.
When it’s finally Mimiko and Nanako’s turn to explain what their daddy does for a living, your small family gathers at the front of the classroom. Plenty of small innocent faces and reassuring smiles fill the room.
“Okay girls, tell us what your parents do for a living.” Their teacher prompts with a warm smile.
“My daddy swallows balls for a living!” Nanako says proudly with a beaming smile.
The kids erupted into laughter while their parents gave you two disgusted looks.
To make matters worse, “He also hates filthy mo-“ Mimiko tries to add on, but Geto quickly covers her mouth with his hand.
After explaining what a vivid imagination your twins have, you go on to explain that Geto is a leader at a church, and well, that doesn’t go over too well either.
“Homeschool?” Geto suggests as the four of you walk home.
“Most definitely.” You agree. Mimiko and Nanako are now educated by you at the home, where they can’t out their dad for swallowing balls.
TOJI
“Mama, make papa come to career day.” Your young son, Megumi, demanded. He had a small little pout on his face, and his arms were firmly crossed over his chest. Behind him, Toji stood, shaking his head at his son’s determination.
He often did this: telling you to make Toji do something because you were the only person who could make Toji do anything. After all these years, mans was still wrapped around your finger.
“Baby, Papa’s job is kinda private.” You explain quietly as you pet Megumi’s soft hair.
The small boy’s look of determination shifted to a look of reserve. Even as a young child, he wasn’t great at showing when his feelings were hurt, but you could always tell.
“Gumi.” You say his name softly, bending over to look at the boy’s flat expression.
You were also the only one who could coax Megumi into showing his real emotions.
Tears welled in his eyes, and his bottom lip started quivering. “I don’t wanna be the only one whose parents didn’t come.”
“Oh baby.” You frown as you pull your son into a hug. You glare upwards at Toji, and his eyes widened slightly. He knew what that look meant. “You’re going to career day.” You say to him, leaving no room for argument.
The next day,
“Okay Mr. Fushiguro, what do you do for a living?” The teacher asks Toji as he’s sat next to Megumi. Your son is actually smiling, enjoying the fact that Toji actually came to career day.
“People pay me a large sum of money, and I take care of someone for them.” Toji explains vaguely.
“Oh! Like a doctor?” One of the kids asked with an impressed smile.
“Sure, like a doctor.” Your husband lies, knowing that he does quite the opposite of what a doctor does.
SUKUNA
The look on the kids faces as your tall, muscular, tatted husband walked into the classroom was hilarious. Most of them were completely mortified, giving Sukuna frightened stares.
Your husband was completely unfazed. If anything, he was soaking in the kids’ fear. He sat at the front of the room with a look of arrogance.
Your nephew, Yuji, sat between you two. No, he was technically not your kid, but he didn’t have anyone else to bring to career day. So, Unc Sukuna and Auntie Yn were to the rescue.
“And.. what do you do for work, sir?” The teacher asked in almost a judgmental tone as she eyed Sukuna. You couldn’t tell if she despised him or wanted to fuck him.
“I don’t work. I live off tithe.” Sukuna bluntly answered with a shrug. His lopsided smile never left his face.
“What’s a tithe?” A small child asked quietly.
“It means people pay me out of fear of that I’ll harm them if they don’t.” Your husband gives a child a sharp stare with a challenging smile. He wanted the kids to keep asking questions. The thought of scaring multiple children all at once fueled him.
“Like… beat them up?” Another child asked.
“Like eating their snot-nosed children.” Sukuna answered with a toothy grin. The children all shrieked and cried in terror. Hell, even their parents looked frightened.
“Ryomen.” You chide as you look over towards your husband. He was laughing maniacally, even slapping his knee like the old man he was.
Yuji never invited you two to another career day.
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chuluoyi · 7 months ago
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✎ throughout heaven and earth
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- gojo satoru x reader
a sudden mission. a curse beyond your grade. all hell breaks loose when gojo realizes that there are hidden machinations behind the incident that befalls you
genre: feral!gojo, injured!reader, hurt/comfort, exponential fluff !
note: we need a gojo who will go ballistic against the higher-ups for dragging you in their mess :) refer to this for the reader's CT, and this loosely takes place after the events in heaven's fury, and the epilogue is based on this very brilliant idea :))
a part of gojo's love entries
general masterlist
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Something isn’t right.
You should’ve known it was strange when they assigned you with a sudden mission with little to no briefing. You should’ve gone through with your gut feeling and informed Satoru about it.
Because if you did... now you wouldn’t be running for your life like this, frantically dodging the hacks and slashes of this chainsaw-like cursed spirit that was evidently not a Grade 2 as what you were told.
“Ah!” you yelped as the sharp ends of its body struck your shoulder, leaving you bleeding openly. This was no small wound—it was deep enough to make you stagger.
You had to do something about this because merely avoiding wouldn’t save your life. You had to come back in one piece. You have to— for your baby and Satoru.
What if I can’t? The sheer thought made you tremble. Your baby boy was still so little and he needed you more than anyone, and Satoru...
God, you couldn’t bear to leave him alone. Not again. He couldn't handle losing someone again, not after all he had already lost.
You gripped your whip—your cursed weapon—tightly amidst your bleeding hand. You had barely enough cursed energy for a domain expansion that guaranteed a sure-hit effect. You have one shot. This was all or nothing.
But you weren’t sure if it would work, because you were on the verge of exhaustion, and this was a special grade curse. Your domain expansion was definitely not as refined as the Satoru’s, and this monster was an enemy of his class.
“Satoru...” your voice came out in a sob. You were terribly scared, and honestly you were entitled to. You weren’t even sure you would survive this at all, and all you could think now was your husband’s silly grin and how much you loved him.
And right afterwards, you saw the cursed spirit lunging at you, and with everything left that you had, you screamed—
“Domain Expansion: Transcendent Veil!”
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“Gojo-sensei, p-please come back... Nee-san is...!”
Satoru was in Kyoto when he received that call from Megumi— and that moment shattered his world as he knew it.
“Megumi, what is it?”
“She w-was sent on a mission... but then it's a special grade— a-and... she... she e-exorcised it b-but—!”
He teleported without second thought to Tokyo. His mind was blank, the only sound he could hear was his own violent heartbeats, and his fists were clenched so tightly.
“The cursed spirit got her too… It made a cut on her neck.”
His most precious wife... the one person he must protect at all cost, was now possibly—
“Megumi.” He saw him sitting on the hallway of the headquarters’ hospital the with his son on his lap—you had asked him to look after your baby—and the boy looked up to him.
“Gojo-sensei...” Megumi appeared shaken, and seeing that, Satoru immediately took his child from his hands, pulling the little kid into his embrace.
“Go back home, I’ll stay here.”
In all his life, Megumi had never seen Gojo Satoru as calm as he was now. He looked fearsome, as if he was in the battlefield.
“Ichiji.” Satoru turned to the other man rigidly standing next to Megumi, causing him to stiffen up even more. He didn’t say anything further as he pat his little son’s back, and yet Ichiji knew all the same what he wanted from him.
“It’s from… the higher ups, Gojo-san.” Ichiji gulped as he said it. “Y/N-san was suddenly called in yesterday night, and she was told it was an urgent mission.”
“Who called her?”
“It was…”
When Ichiji told him the name, suddenly Satoru barked a snort, and his lips curled into a manic grin. It was a menacing sight for both Ichiji and Megumi, as he looked almost unhinged if not for his secure grip on his son.
But contrary to what they were thinking, what filled Satoru at that moment was pure, unadulterated fury. A righteous sense of being crossed—because, how fucking dare they?
Those higher ups first pressed him to execute Yuji, and when he paid them no mind… now they staged this atrocity against you, most definitely to serve as a warning to him.
“Ichiji, tell them that I’ll pay a visit tomorrow. And drive Megumi home tonight.”
He would make his point loud and clear. He would show them how wrong it was to ever test him. But…
The plan barely satisfied him. They hurt you. His heart finally lurched as he processed the fact… when he heard his baby’s soft whimper against his shoulder.
. . .
You sustained serious injuries, but finally, you were out of critical condition.
When Satoru was allowed to see you, you were still connected to many monitors and breathing machine. He brought your baby too inside, and upon clearly seeing both of them, suddenly your eyes welled up with tears.
“Hey…” his hand gripped yours reassuringly. You sniffled when the strain of your broken ribs made you almost cry out in pain, and Satoru immediately calmed you down.
“Sweets— hey, don’t cry, yeah? You did good.” He pressed a soft kiss on the back of your hand. “You did freaking good. You’re okay now. You’re going to recover, yeah?”
You gave him a tearful little nod, feeling so grateful that you could see him again. And unbeknownst to you, seeing you like this broke his heart too.
“Mwa...” your baby, cradled in your husband’s arms, suddenly stretched his tiny hands towards you, and Satoru handed him over for you to hold.
With the little strength you possessed, you reached out to stroke his soft cheeks. Your son... the thought of how close you came to death brought another tear rolling down your cheek.
All sort of thoughts went through Satoru’s head at the sight. His wife, the mother of his son, who is proud of him for everything he does—
—and their sorry asses dared to hurt you.
Suddenly all he saw was red.
And he swore he would make it right to you. Soon.
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“Ah, Satoru-kun… to what I owe the pleasure?”
“…I’ve heard that it was you who assigned that special grade mission to my wife, correct?”
“Oh, that. First of all, I must apologize for my... oversight. We were misinformed... Our scouts made a mistake while filling the files.”
Satoru was trying not to lose his composure first thing after coming here. Really.
But the knowing tone of the elderly Jujutsu Commander only fueled his rage, growing stronger the longer he stood behind this stupid paper divider.
“So it’s a mistake, huh?” he repeated in a satire manner. “Then do you know that my wife has just gotten out of her maternity leave this week?”
The man behind the divider chuckled quietly. “Satoru-kun… I know the sentiment. Of course you’ll be worried, and it did end in a rather… unfortunate incident. However, jujutsu sorcerers are bound to their duty, and your wife cannot rely too heavily on her status as a member of the Gojo clan to be excluded from—”
Fuck it. He had no patience any longer.
“Seems like I need to be a lot rougher, after all.”
Suddenly the room crackled with electricity and the Jujutsu Commander gasped at the sense of foreboding he felt. “Gojo, you can’t—!”
“Heh, but I can.” He let out the most satisfied laugh before opening his palm and chanting in a lower voice: “Cursed Technique Lapse: Blue.”
In a matter of seconds, the audience chamber of jujutsu headquarters turned into a pile of destruction. The commander barely made it out the deadly vacuum vortex with a shriek.
“Ah! N-no! Get a-away from me!” Satoru stared down at him coldly through his unobstructed heavenly eyes, as he pitifully tried to crawl away. He took one step towards him, stomped on his hand ruthlessly—causing the man to scream, before he got down to his level.
“N-no! Please, s-spare me...!”
“This is my first and last warning to you.” It was beyond terrifying, to see those six eyes in this close proximity. But even more dreadful was the tight chokehold on his throat—
“If you ever try to pull this idiotic stunt again on my wife, know that I can and I will snap your neck.” Satoru’s face split into a sinister grin as he tapped the man’s nape, before he crushed the bones of his hand with a crack and made him howl. “Remember that, yeah?”
. . . that day, none in jujutsu headquarters dared to spread any word about Gojo Satoru’s outrageous conduct, even when it was an attack against their own highest ranking leader.
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“Satoru, you don’t have to, really—”
“Nuh, uh! I’ve promised you I’ll nurse you back to health!”
Unaware of anything and everything, you thought that your loving husband was a silly jester trying to make you feel better. On the fifth day of your stay in hospital, you were well enough to eat solid food, and Satoru insisted on spoon feeding you the fruits he cut himself.
“Good girl,” he praised with a wholly playful smile as you chewed on the watermelon. You looked at him with a mock frown, pursing your lips.
“You’re making me look like a kid.”
“You are, in fact, my second kid, so I have all rights to baby you.”
You let out a giggle, but then suddenly your throat felt like it was closing in and you coughed. Instinctively, you reached for your neck— your fingers tracing the scar there.
You still could remember the sense of paralyzing fear you felt as soon as your neck was cut. The heavy bleeding that followed, the way the world blacking out around you…
“Sweets…?” Satoru put down the plate and got a grip on your trembling figure. He gently pushed your chin up to meet his eyes. “Hey, look at me. Look at me, hmm?”
Your frantic eyes locked onto his, and your rapid breathing steadied. Your clammy hand reached out to touch his face... before you lunged forward, throwing your arms around him.
“Sweetheart…” Satoru hugged you back in return, sighing against the nape on your neck, as he planted a soft kiss there.
You tried your best not to cry but it was hard not to while remembering everything.
“I-I was so scared…”
“Mhm.”
“I-I kept thinking… w-what if I c-can’t see you… or baby again…? I… I s-still want to do a lot of… things… w-with you…”
The way you shook in his arms like a fragile leaf made something inside him burn. He was supposed to provide you with security, give you a life far removed from curses—
Having left that warning against the higher-ups wasn’t enough, he should’ve made him beg for his life more—
“Listen to me,” Satoru said as he broke the hug, the deep frown in his grave expression made you almost sob. He gently wiped your overflowing tears with the pads of his thumbs.
“Stop thinking that. You’re alright. You’re going to get better. You and me—we are going to raise our son together.”
You took in each of his words fully, even as your lips quivered.
“And mark my words…” Right in this moment, you thought that your husband was most dashing as he gave you his promises—as his blue eyes glimmered under the light. “They won’t ever lay their hands on you ever again. Not while I’m here. Not ever. I already made sure of that.”
You were curious about what he did, but you chose not to press further when Satoru leaned in suddenly and brushed his lips against yours in a soft kiss, melting your heart into mush.
When he pulled away, it was his usual teasing grin on his handsome face. “Now, I only have one duty left— that is to get my cute wife back on her feet. So, be a good little wifey and have lots of fruits and sleep, okay?”
You giggled freely this time, feeling tremendously safe and loved, and instead of answering, you chose to peck his lips instead— hoping that he’d know that you trusted him with your whole life.
. . .
“By the way… Satoru, where’s our baby?” you missed your pumpkin, and while being with your funny husband lifted your spirits, you wanted to cuddle him too.
He chuckled in response. “Ah! Since Megumi is on an assignment, I left him with Ichiji earlier! Don’t worry, I’ll come pick him up soon, ‘kay?”
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Epilogue
“I’m going out for a bit, and if you ever make him upset or cry… I can and I will sense it! So Ichiji—do your best!”
“Bwa…”
“Eeek!”
Ichiji stared at Baby Gojo with literal sweat on his forehead, as the little being curiously looked up at him.
By all means, this baby was adorable. Even more so when his father dressed him in a shark onesie. It was a peculiar choice—just like any of Gojo’s choices were—but it sure made the baby look even more endearing.
But the thing is… he didn’t feel secure enough to hold him! Especially when he didn’t know if Gojo’s claim of telepathic connection with his son was true or not!
Amidst his thoughts, suddenly Ichiji felt a soft touch on his arm and immediately turned to find the little munchkin putting his little hand on him and staring at him with such pureness unbefitting of Gojo Satoru’s son.
How can this baby be a stark contrast to his father? Ichiji was almost tempted to snuggle him, but he knew better.
“O-oh… d-don’t touch me…”
And as he retracted his hand back, the baby suddenly widened his eyes, feeling betrayed apparently, as his little lips wobbled and face scrunched up, so ready to burst into tears—
“Hic…”
“—!! Nooo! Don’t cry! Your father will fry me! Eeek!!”
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fushitoru · 16 days ago
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trouble a gojo satoru fic
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pairing ⸺ bully!satoru gojo x reader
summary ⸺ an unexpected tutoring session with your bully satoru gojo leads to somewhere...unexpected
warnings ⸺ SMUT (MDNI), fluff, slight angst, college au, porn with really mid plot, bullying, humiliation, PANTY INSPECTION, p i v sex, unprotected sex, aftercare, creampie, he whimpers a lot but also degrades you a lot, gojo satoru king of dirty talk it might not make sense lolz, this is not edited in the slightest, didn't even do it a once over, implied that reader is a virgin but not really art by the goat 3-aem
a/n sorry for being so ia. will be answering asks after the ao3 author ahh events that went on this past week T-T as a result this is kind of mid, might delete later, based on this req
general masterlist
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This could not be happening to you. NO, no, no. You must be dreaming, right?
Because Satoru Gojo was sitting right across from you in your math professor’s office, looking akin to a kicked puppy, ears drooping as your professor continued ranting about his late assignments, his efforts to cover his grades up, lost potential, laziness, how he should learn from you—but you were only dreading the aftermath of this conversation, when you were left alone with Gojo. 
Because he was your college bully.
It didn’t get as violent as in those Asian dramas, but you were often left humiliated from the nuisance he was. For example, take the instance when you both first met. 
Head deep in the textbooks you just bought, you were scanning the formulas in an effort to get ahead; after all, for someone like you—dependent on a scholarship to attend university—slacking off was not an option. Only for the nepo trust fund babies—which you were not. There, in the prestigious university you had fought tooth and nail to get into, you were at peace. 
But it all went out the window as someone moved to tap you on your shoulder, making you turn your head towards possibly the most handsomest boy you’ve ever seen but undeniably a spoiled kid. Because what came out of his words were definitely grounds for sexual harassment.
“Are Asian people your type? Because I’m China get in your japanties.”
If crickets could make their way into the study room you were sitting in, their chirps would be LOUD. You blinked, heat creeping up your face as he leaned closer to your face, eyes flirtingly honing in on yours and your lips. Abruptly—-flustered—you stood up, gathering your belongings and apologizing profusely. “I”m so—sorry—I don’t—-you might be talking to the wrong per—” because there was no way in hell he was addressing you. From what you could see, he looked like a rich kid, the kind with a lot of money—something that could land you in trouble. You booked it the hell out of there, ignoring the confused look on his face and missing the disappointment flicker across it as he saw your retreating figure leave his sight.
And thus, your love story with Satoru Gojo—who you soon found out was the most popular boy on campus—started. 
Small encounters with Gojo kept plaguing your first semester. They would be chance encounters, where Gojo would catch your eye in the middle of a crowd and make his way towards you, a snarky grin creeping up his face as he cornered you into a hallway with less traffic. Sometimes even in a closet.
It wouldn’t be anything grave, to say. All he would ask is how your day was, all sweet nothings and cute smiles made to woo you. And they definitely did—but you couldn’t let it show, couldn’t let him woo you.
“What’s your next class, baby?” The both of you were in a janitor’s closet, him having cornered you in the room and locked  the door. You kept biting your lip nervously, the edge of it red and swollen as you peered at him somewhat nervously.
“Uh—I don’t know,” you whispered, darting your eyes somewhere on the floor, so he wouldn’t see the avoidant look on your face.
Let’s get the record straight: you weren’t scared of Gojo. Sure, at 6’ 3’’ with piercing, glow-in-the-dark sapphire eyes, he made you nervous, but you knew you could pine for him at best. Because god knows what would happen if you ever cross him or his dozens of fan girls, some with considerably more power than you on campus. Putting a target on your back while you were trying to graduate wasn’t one of your goals, but trying to pass your math classes with honors was.
And you hated the fact Gojo could read you like a book. Because in the cramped, dark space, his eyes were almost..soft as he put his forearm across the wall on top of your head, effectively caging you in as he steps toward you. You hug your big and heavy books closer to your chest, the squish of your breasts over your top not lost to Gojo who eyes them with lidded eyes. Then, they make their way to meet yours, and it’s like he can see the pining in your eyes. The fact that he’s a carrot dangled in front of your head, something you want but if you ran, you would never have him. A perpetual race to make him yours.
He smiles, gives a soft chuckle. “You don’t know?” he teases you and your blatant lie. “C’mon, let me walk you there.”
But you blurt out an immediate “No!” and then regret it, because hurt flashes across his face. “I mean–” you falter, “please don’t. You’ll be seen publicly with me.”
A quizzical look, one that is so innocent that it makes you want to cry, because how could Gojo ever understand your problems? “What’s the problem?” And then he pouts. “You embarrassed of me?”
“No–no—” you shake your head, squirming slightly from where you were both standing. “It won’t be good for you, for me.” Then, you swallowed, waiting and screening for his reaction.
Praying to whatever gods that were listening to you that he would understand, it seemed that they were answered because an emotion you couldn’t place etched its way on his face until he nodded. A resolute one, yet something that made you a bit…uneasy was in his eyes. Because it meant nothing but trouble.
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Then on went your days. Seven days, in fact, because it only took a week for you to be walking across the hallway, daydreaming about a boy without a face cuddling you in the winter, eating cookies in Christmas. You hated being single and hated the fact you were confined to your academic responsibilities; quickly, your professors caught onto your potential, assigning you to tutor your peers during recitations. You preened at the attention and validation but felt lonely because it occupied all your time to catch up on others’ expectations. In your rumination of your upcoming responsibilities, you didn’t notice the hand shoot out and firmly grab your arm until you were in a janitor’s closet. Yet again.
Shocked, you resisted the unknown person who had led you in here, instincts flaring up until said person turned on the light. 
Gojo.
“Gojo, what are you—” You didn’t get a chance to finish your sentence, as Gojo had covered your mouth with his arm, one to avoid causing too much commotion before you were discovered there.
“You said no one could see us, right?” A mischievous—yet yearning—look flashed across his face and it was then you realized his play. “So this is okay?”
No, this stubborn man wasn’t going to let you go—he was going to torment you. In secret.
The only response you could conjure your brain was a whimper because a tentative hand was creeping its way up your thigh, softy caressing the insides of it. All you could feel was pleasure and how it was so right despite it being so wrong that Satoru Gojo, the campus sweetheart, had cornered you into the janitor’s closet to give you the most dizzying touches, some you couldn’t deny.
So when he moved his other hand that was at your mouth to grab at your pink skirt, he lifted the hem with both his hands and then paused. Looked at you with darkened eyes. “Let me do this.”
You could only close your eyes in your flustered state, pinching them shut as you gave him a slight nod. It only took him a millisecond to move, using both of his hands to uncover what was between your thighs, eyes focused and widening as he inspected your panties.
“Pink with hearts, huh?” You could hear the chuckle in his voice, the cockiness basically oozing out and you could only continue to heat up deeper. “I like it, baby.” Jumping as you felt his hands roam and trace the edges of your panties, he hooked his finger in the crotch, your thighs tightening slightly as his index just oh so grazed your bare folds as he pulled and pulled, until he let go of the tension and it snapped back in its place. “Look at me.”
As per his instruction, you opened your eyes, only to be taken aback by the intensity in his. Then, his lips moved. “Be my girlfriend.”
The moment broke as clarity hit you. This shouldn’t have happened. “I’m sorry, Gojo, but—”
“Don’t call me that,” he groaned, stepping back and raking an arm through his hair. “What’s even your problem? Did I do something wrong?”
Incredulous, you utter out a “Something wro—you don’t think you did something wrong?”
He looked at you for a bit, made to say something, but you cut him off. “You know what Gojo? Get this through your head. We can’t do this. I don’t know how many girls fall for this, but I can’t. I’m sorry.” With that, you made to move, but he quickly reached out, pleading for you to stay. You wrenched his hand out of your grip and said, in the most serious voice you could muster, “Don’t ever talk to me again.” And you walked out, pretending you weren’t scared of what would happen after you retaliated against the Satoru Gojo.
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Surprising, all went well for the rest of the semester. You did get some whispers and stares because of the stray rumor or two passing around about you and the mysterious instances when the campus king stared at your figure for a flicker too long. But it wasn’t nothing but passing because you didn’t share any classes with Gojo, and he respected your wishes. You didn’t miss the bitterness in his stare when you passed by his friend group in the hallway, speeding up to shake off the weight of his eyes on you.
So, you were at peace. Until second semester’s Calc III.
You soon realize that with gradients and vectors comes an additional burden, one specifically sporting white hair. Because as you’re pulled into your math professor’s office and see him, you oh so desperately want to book it. 
“And this, Satoru,” your professor pauses and looks at him sternly while gesturing towards you, “is your ticket out of failing. Miss Y/N here,” he gives you a comforting smile, one that does nothing to ease the stiffness flooding your body at the thought of Gojo right next to you, “has the highest grade in the class. She’s a seasoned teaching assistant too, helping a lot of people in her classes next year.” You silently curse, your smile growing more strained as you realize Gojo’s looking at you. “I trust that you’ll be in good care.”
Once the professor finally dismissed you both, you braced yourself, shoving your notebook back into your bag with far more force than necessary. The prospect of *actually* tutoring Satoru Gojo—the one person who seemed hell-bent on making college a gauntlet for you—was absurd.
You didn't look up as you pushed past him, but Gojo kept pace, following you out of the office and down the hall with that easy, unbothered stride of his. "So," he drawled, “how's this tutoring thing going to work? Are you coming to my place, or am I coming to yours?”
You stopped, turning to face him. "My place," you said firmly. The thought of seeing him lounging in some flashy, high-end apartment was insufferable. Besides, at least in your dorm, you could set some ground rules.
He blinked, looking surprised. "Your place? Bold move, Miss Perfect," he teased, that trademark smirk flickering onto his face. “Didn’t think you’d be so eager to have me over.”
"Trust me, Gojo, I'm only doing this because I have to. And there will be rules," you said, crossing your arms. "No messing around, no games—just math."
“*Just math,*" he repeated, his tone playful as his eyes glinted with mischief. “Got it.”
You swallowed, hoping he meant it. "Fine," you said briskly. "I’ll see you tomorrow at six. Don’t be late."
“Oh, wouldn’t miss it,” he replied, and with a little salute, he strolled off, leaving you with a sense of impending doom.
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The knock came precisely at six.
You opened the door, and there stood Satoru Gojo, surprisingly punctual, hands shoved into his pockets and a playful grin on his face. You gestured to the small study area you’d set up by your desk, filled with neatly organized notes and textbooks.
“Take a seat,” you said shortly. “We’ll start with the basics.”
He slid into the chair, his gaze flitting from the textbooks to you, an amused glint in his eye. “You weren’t kidding about tutoring. You’re all set up like a professional.”
You ignored the remark and opened the textbook to the chapter on derivatives. “Alright. Let’s go through this. If you understand derivatives, the rest of Calc III will start making sense.”
For a while, he seemed to actually pay attention. He followed along, asking a few questions, which you answered as patiently as possible. But as the explanations went on, his attention started to drift. After one too many halfhearted nods, you frowned, putting your pencil down.
“You’re not even trying, are you?”
He leaned back in his chair, that smirk resurfacing. “Maybe I just wanted an excuse to spend time with you.”
You rolled your eyes, fighting off the blush creeping up your cheeks. “You needed my help. I didn’t force you to come here. If you don’t want to do this, then—”
He held up a hand, the teasing gone from his face. “Alright, alright. I’ll focus.” He paused, then added, “In fact, to show you I mean it, I’ll do you a favor. Whatever you want. My way of saying thanks.”
You eyed him warily. “A favor?”
“Anything,” he said, leaning in with a grin that spelled trouble. “What’ll it be? An escort to class? Carrying your books around? Name it.”
 “I’ll let you know when I think of something.” You’re dismissive, knowing he’s not that serious about this, playful about this like he is everything else. 
He chuckled, nodding. “Looking forward to it.”
And with that, he finally settled into his chair, this time with genuine focus, leaving you both in the kind of quiet that held a new, unspoken promise—a favor, an IOU hanging in the air between you.
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You don’t know how you ended up under Gojo on your bed. 
Satoru sat close—closer than you’d expected. His knee brushed yours as he leaned forward to study your notes, and every few minutes, his arm would brush against your hand as he reached for the pencil you were using to write equations. Each little touch sent a jolt through you, and judging by the lingering glances he kept giving you, he didn’t mind it either.
“Okay, so the derivative here is...?” you asked, trying to keep your voice steady as you pointed at the next problem.
Satoru leaned even closer, squinting at your notebook. “I think I get it,” he murmured, his face inches from yours, his breath warm as it brushed your cheek. But instead of looking at the math, his eyes flicked to yours, lingering just a second too long.
Your heart hammered as you forced yourself to focus. “Right. So you should get… uh… that answer,” you managed, feeling his gaze still trained on you.
“Uh-huh,” he replied, not breaking eye contact. His hand shifted on the table, the back of his fingers grazing yours.
You didn’t move. Neither did he. Your fingers stayed where they were, brushing against each other, the soft, deliberate touch making the silence between you feel louder. Finally, you broke the tension by clearing your throat, quickly pulling your hand away to grab a different textbook.
“So—um, yeah, you’re almost there,” you stammered. “But you missed a step here.” You pointed to another section, hoping he wouldn’t notice the slight shake in your voice.
He noticed, of course. You could see his smirk in the corner of your eye.
“Is that all I missed?” he asked, leaning so close that his shoulder pressed against yours. His voice was lower now, more intimate.
You nodded, trying to focus on the page but finding it impossible with him so close. “Yeah. Just… that,” you said softly.
“Thanks,” he murmured, his voice dropping even more as he shifted his hand, his knuckles brushing against your knee now. It wasn’t intentional—at least, you thought it wasn’t—but neither of you moved. You felt frozen, caught in a quiet, charged moment, where all you could hear was your own heartbeat.
You swallowed, forcing your gaze back to the problem on the page. “Maybe, um… maybe we should take a break?” you suggested, needing a second to breathe.
He tilted his head, an amused, knowing, intense glint in his eye. “A break sounds nice.” 
Your breath caught as he looked at you like that, his hand still warm where it lingered just a little too close. And in that brief moment, you wondered just what kind of favor you’d end up asking of him—or what he might ask of you in return.
And it seemed like he knew what you were thinking. “Hey,” he said oh so breathlessly, in the way that made you want to throw yourself at him yet simultaneously bludgeon his head in, “wanna fuck?”
You reeled back, incredulous, but he quickly grabbed your head with both his hands, gently drawing you in. “What?”  
“I mean,” and he giggled, “what better use of a favor for than me to rid you of your virginity?”
You gasp, struggling in his hold to no avail. “Why would you assume I’m a virgin? I have plenty of experience, thank you very much—”
All the man does is snigger, despite your glare at him and looks at you, peering at you through his eyelashes with an oh-so-adoring smile. “It was clear how much you soaked through your panties that last time you’re a virgin, baby.” And you can’t help but whimper, reduced to a melting mess because of his sweet words. 
He laughs meanly. “If you’re not a virgin, you better not be soaked right now, baby. I’m kind of excited to see what panties you’re wearing this time” He moves his hand between your thighs, and you pliantly spread your legs for him, clenching as his hands rove over your panties in between your skirt. And he’s right, because it’s almost like you’ve wet your panties with the way your slick was flooding out of you because of your proximity with Satoru. “Look at that,” he coos and he pulls his hand away, much to your dismay, to examine his fingers. They glisten vulgarly in the fairy lights in your dorm, and Satoru turns his head to look at you. “So you gonna let me fuck you?”
And that, dear reader, is how you find yourself face down in your plushies on your dorm room bed, clutching them for dear life as Satoru spews dirty talk as if he was born doing it. “Satoru, faster!” you sob, having gone past the initial discomfort of having something in your pussy. 
“Satoru, faster,” he mocks you, grabbing your hips and drilling into your heat, groaning at how you’re just so tight. The tears flowing down your face make you even more beautiful as you succumb to your pleasure, one that no one other than Satoru has ever made you feel. “Isn’t this what you wanted? For me to fuck you?” You don’t answer past your moaning, and that annoys the fuck out of Gojo. He slaps your ass consecutively and can’t help but be more aroused looking at the red handprints he leaves. “Answer me.”
“Yes,” you moaned, anything to stop his assault on your ass, “I wanted this is sooo bad.” At that—rather than being satiated—Satoru sped up, hitting your spot with the accuracy of a sharpshooter.
“Yea, baby?” He laughs, meanly, leaning down to grab you by the chin, forcing you to look at him. His fingers squished your cheeks, thereby pursuing your lips as he tried not to cum from the sight of your eyes rolling back with each stroke into you. From the way you were clenching and pulsing more regularly around him, he could tell you were close. “Gonna cum?”
You whined, nodding while sobbing into his hands, trying to focus on the feeling of orgasming. It was so close, you could feel it coiling in your belly—
Just for him to rip out of your cavern, leaving you in shambles due to the emptiness you were feeling. “What—”
He tutted, his hand now slowly stroking his cock while he was sitting on his knees, looking down at you. “I’m only letting you come if you agree to be my girlfriend.”
“Gojo, what—”
“It’s Satoru,” his eyes flared, looking at you with an intensity you hadn’t noticed before. “And say it. Say you’ll be mine.”
For a moment, you searched his eyes for any signs. Signs of insincerity, of humor. But all you could find was desperation and yearning. Ever since you kept having your chance encounters with Gojo, you couldn’t help but deny the fluttering in your heart; the way his eyes unconsciously looked for you, a mere stranger he had taken interest in, in every crowd made you feel seen in a world where you were otherwise invisible.
And you couldn’t help but want to continue being in that world, in his world.
“Fine,” you whispered. “I’ll be your girlfr—”
Before you could finish, he smashed his lips into yours, joining them in a messy, wet embrace. His tongue explored your mouth in a way that made you leak even more while he aggressively laid back down on the mattress, effortlessly lifting you onto his crotch and onto his dick. As he thrusted into you, desperately, he couldn’t help but continue blabbing sweet nothings.
“I’ll treat you so well—haah—take you out on dates,” he heaved, eyes watering as he thrusted slowly into you in long, deep strokes. His eyes never left you as he made love to you, his face going up to nuzzle in between your breasts, peering at you through lidded eyes lovingly. “Fuck you well every night, show you off to the world.”
You could only sob Satoru as you looked at his face through your tears, him doing all the talking for you. “Every day,” he groaned, his cock pulsing and twitching in your walls, “I’ll love you like you’re my wife and fuck you like you’re my slut. So—” and he took a sharp intake of breath, one that you could interpret as him getting close with the way his hips were continually getting more and more sloppy, “so proud of you, baby. Gonna take care of you.” Then, he meets his eyes with yours as he starts to speed up, hand moving to gently rub at your clit in circles, with such prowess that you know you’re not going to last long. “Pull you—haah—pull you aside and see what panties you wore for me that day. Coming inside—coming inside and making you walk around with my cum leakin’ out of your panties.”
And then he whimpers as he loses control. “Gonna—” he utters in between short breaths, “gonna come baby. Come with me.”
“I will, Satoru,” you whine. “Please, I wanna—I wanna kiss!” That’s when Satoru can’t hold himself back anymore, his cum shooting in ropes inside of you at the innocent gesture you wanted him to do while he was doing such filthy things to you. You come alongside with him, everything so overwhelming as you ride out your orgasm on top of him. 
As you’re both settling down from your orgasm, he pulls you off—the both of you wincing at the sudden emptiness—as he lays you down next to him. Without a word, he nuzzles in between your breasts, giving a content sigh as he literally melts like a cat, relaxed in your embrace. You can’t help but giggle at his antics, and he takes his face out of your cleavage to give you a boyish grin. “What’re you laughing at?” “Nothing,” you shake your head. “Just the fact I’m chained to you now.”
“Hey!” he pouts, moving his arms so he’s embracing you tightly, effectively trapping you in. “Say that again and I’m going to sleep on top of you and never leave.”
“Can’t believe I’m chained to y—”
Satoru plops on top of you, making a show of tickling your ribs and stomach as you gasp and laugh in surprise. “Satoru!” He doesn’t relent, until you feel a familiar liquid ooze and leak out of your pussy.
This time, your shriek of Satoru’s name doesn’t go unnoticed. At the murderous look on your face–as well as the sheer messiness in between your thighs—he gets up. Smiles sweetly. “Should just leave you like this, leaking my cum. It’s only fair for how you ignored me!”
At that, he gets a pillow to his face, reminiscent of a kicked puppy as he trudges to your bathroom to clean you up. 
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happy74827 · 3 months ago
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Joyride
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[Wade Wilson x Female!Reader]
Synopsis: Remember kids, always look at the road when driving. It can help you avoid certain blabber mouths 🫶
WC: 2556
Category: Fluff, Annoying!Deadpool, 4th Wall Breaks, Insane Amounts of Profanity {TW: Deadpool (for obvious reasons)}
In honor of watching Deadpool 3 (super good btw), enjoy this random chaotic fic I created with the help of @yoursacredqueenmother. This is super chaotic lmfao
『••✎••』
Shit. Shit. Shit. SHIT.
A millisecond ago, you were driving down a street. In the middle of traffic. At a red light. Now, you were panicking, looking over the front of your car for the flash of red you had just seen. It took a couple of seconds for you to realize that there was blood on your car and on the ground—a lot of blood.
"Oh, shit. Oh shit, oh shit, oh shit, oh shit!"
You quickly hopped out of the car, rushing to the spot you thought the person… or thing would be, but… there was nobody. There was blood on the ground but nobody.
Did you hit a deer, and it just… ran off? No, that can't be right. You definitely saw something red, and it most certainly was not a deer.
You looked around, confused. How the hell does something bleed all over the ground and then disappear without a trace?!
You got back in your car, deciding to drive to the closest police station. Maybe they knew something about this.
So, you decided to abandon the shortcut home and drive to the nearest police station, which happened to be just down the road. But as you were minutes into the drive, you felt the sudden urge to look in your rearview mirror.
And there you found your mysterious red-suited victim in the backseat, holding the biggest knife you have ever seen as his white-covered eyes stared at you from behind the mask.
You never hit the brakes faster in your life. The car made an ugly screeching sound, and the sudden force slammed the red-clad man into the back of your seat, making him let out a surprised yelp.
The car finally came to a stop, and the masked man recovered quickly, pushing himself off of your seat and glaring at you.
"Well, aren’t you just a heart break—"
He didn’t get the chance to finish his sentence.
You grabbed your keys from the ignition and popped off the attached pepper spray, turning around and squirting him in the face. He let out a scream, and you quickly got out of the car, shutting the door and running as fast as you could.
Unfortunately, you didn’t get very far. Despite being hit by a car, and subsequently getting pepper sprayed, the man (or what you assume to be) caught up with you and blocked your path, his hands on his hips, his head cocked to the side.
"Alright, lady, what the fuck?" He asked, his voice sounding nasally, most likely because of the spray.
You stared at him, confused. He looked like he was waiting for an explanation.
"W-What the fuck?! What the fuck me? What the fuck you!" You exclaimed, your voice cracking a little. "What the fuck are you doing in my car?!"
"Well, I was trying to hitch a ride! But clearly, that didn't work out. Thanks a lot, by the way, for the pain and suffering. You’ve really opened up my horizons here."
It almost sounded like he was pouting.
"What the—! A ride?! Why in the hell would you just hop into someone's car?!"
"Uhh, because you ran me over, genius! I mean, come on, the least you could do is offer a guy a ride home after that. And then, the cherry on top of the fucking sundae: pepper spray!"
The masked man, so to speak, threw his arms up in the air, and you could almost see him rolling his eyes underneath the mask. Of course, that’s when you noticed the obvious broken bones in his hands. And the blood. There was a lot of blood.
"Look," the guy started, walking closer to you. "I know, I'm a big scary guy with a big scary knife and a bad temper and all, and you’re just… well, I’m sure you have an amazing personality, but how about we put all that aside, and you give me a ride, alright? Just drop me off at the corner of 10th and 55th, and you can forget this ever happened."
"Your arm… your wrist. It's broken," you told him.
"Yeah, no shit," the man scoffed. "Got any Taylor Swift CDs in that car?"
"Uh… no, not really. Why?"
"Cause, baby, I’m Shaking It Off!"
There was a pregnant pause, and you weren't quite sure if he was being serious or not. I mean, surely he wasn’t about to just ignore the fact that his arm was the complete opposite of norm—
But when he shook his arm in a violent manner, and a loud crack followed suit, you realized, with a heavy heart, that yes, this guy was serious.
What you didn’t know until a few seconds later, however, was that he snapped his bones back into place like it was nothing. It took the flexing in his fingers to realize it, too.
"Holy shit." You truly were in awe.
He seemed to find amusement in your expression, tilting his head slightly and giving you a once-over. And, yes, you could feel his eyes on you, and for some reason, it sent a shiver down your spine.
"So… Wendy Torrance, about that ride? Can you give me a lift, or are we gonna start that chick flick moment where your mental breakdown leads to slow-motion running to a Sia song?"
You could only stare.
"Alright, well, if you're going through with the latter, then at least play something that doesn’t involve that little dancing girl who likes to wear potato sacks as clothes."
You couldn’t believe this was happening.
"You are literally insane." You breathed out, shaking your head.
Even if you couldn’t see it, something told you that he made the biggest grin underneath his mask.
"Why, thank you, darling."
Fast forward a couple of minutes, and you found yourself driving towards the address the red-suited stranger had given you. You couldn’t really make conversation. He had his hands in his lap, playing with a knife, and was staring at you, his head tilted.
"You can blink, you know. I'm not a zombie," he informed you, making a gesture to his mask and eyes, which you assumed he was blinking underneath.
"Right," you nodded.
“Well, mostly, at least. I mean, I still have a pulse, but it's kind of irregular, and I think it's because I keep getting shot and stabbed in the heart. Oh, and I guess I'm also pretty much immortal, so that's probably the reason. But I think the whole not-dying thing cancels out the heartbeat thing, right? Like, the more times you get impaled or decapitated or set on fire, the more it doesn’t matter because it doesn’t affect you anymore, am I right?"
You glanced at him. He was staring at you, his hands still and his knife resting on his leg.
"…Do you ever shut up?"
"Woah-hoho, feisty. And here I thought I was going to break the ice with a good ol' fashioned knock knock joke."
"I don’t think that would've been funny."
"That's what the last girl said."
"Oh yeah?"
"Mhm. Except she wasn’t talking about the joke. I made her laugh in a different way."
You glanced at him again, and he was giving you a knowing look.
"I can't decide if you're disgusting or not."
He hummed, shrugging his shoulders. That made him shut his mouth just long enough for you to turn on the radio but not long enough to avoid the inevitable.
"Hey, hey, I got a good one: Knock knock."
You let out a long sigh, closing your eyes. "Who's there?"
"Orange."
"Orange, who?"
"Orange you glad I'm not a serial killer?"
"That wasn’t even good."
"I know. It would've been better if I could've pulled the knife out of my belt. You know, just for show." He twiddled his fingers at you.
"That wouldn’t have helped," you said.
"Nope," he agreed. "But it would've made a great story."
"I suppose."
"Yeah. Hey, hey, I got another one: Knock knock."
"You just—"
"Knock knock."
You let out a huff. This man was the most childish, annoying, idiotic, strange, weird—
"Knock knock."
"Oh, just fucking tell me the joke!"
"No! It doesn't work that way!"
You rolled your eyes, but before you could answer, he beat you to it.
"Okay, okay, how about this: Knock knock."
You didn't say anything.
"Knock knock."
Your eyes flickered over to him for a second.
"Knock knock."
"For fucks sake!" You exclaimed. "Who's there?"
He leaned forward, closer to you, and you could see his mouth moving.
"Deadpool."
You were confused.
"D-Deadpool? Is this a reference to that shitty horror movie? If so, that wasn't even good, and I'm not laughing, and I don't get the joke."
He just gave you a blank look, or at least you thought he did.
"No. My name's Deadpool."
"That’s…" you trailed off. "A pretty dumb name. Like that outfit you're wearing."
"Hey! Diss the name all you want, but don’t you dare diss the suit. It's my trademark. Not everyone can pull off this type of look; it’s a very rare art."
"Whatever. You still haven't told me the punch line to your dumb joke."
"Punch line? I never said there was a punch line. It was a knock knock joke."
"So then… What was the point? To annoy the driver into wanting to run you over again?"
He chuckled, a low, deep sound that vibrated in his throat. That… That was… oh.
He was still close, and now, with the new angle, you could see the small, yet very visible, curve of his lips, and that made you wonder who was actually hiding behind the mask.
"You are seriously the strangest person I've ever met."
"Oh, babe, you don't even know the half of it."
"Please, enlighten me," you replied sarcastically, glancing over at him.
His masked eyes looked into yours, and you knew he was grinning; you could practically feel it.
"What do you wanna know?" He asked.
"Uh, I don't know. Something other than the fact that you're a nutcase. How about your real name? It's obviously not 'Deadpool,' and I doubt anyone actually calls you that. So, what's your actual name?"
"Oh, wow. Right off the bat, huh? You know, the last girl I was with wasn’t nearly as direct. Then again, she never sprayed me like I was a roach in her kitchen."
You didn’t respond. You kept your eyes on the road.
"Fine," he relented. "But don’t expect a happy ending. This isn’t Kanas anymore, Toto."
He leaned back in his seat, his arm hanging off the open window, the wind blowing through his red suit.
"Names Wade, like the boxers, but without the fancy pants."
You raised an eyebrow.
"Wade Winston Wilson, I love long walks on the beach, and a good movie, and tacos, and chimichangas, and guns. Especially guns. Kinky, but not too kinky… and did I mention the tacos? Cause I love fucking love tacos."
Maybe you should start carrying tape around.
"What about you, sugar lips?" He asked, gesturing to you with the hand he wasn’t leaning against. "Got a name, or can I call you mine? Ooh, I should’ve used that before the pepper spray. 'What's your name, or can I call you mine?' Classic, Wade. Well, except for the fact that I forgot the 'I'd like to hit it from the back' part. Damn, should have used that, too. It's a good thing they gave you the lead. Otherwise, the audience would've been confused. They would've been wondering, 'Why did the writer suddenly change the dialogue to be about sex? Wasn’t this supposed to be that pure Notebook love story we all wanted?'"
He paused for a moment.
"Wait a minute. Are we still doing the monologue thing, or is the writer done? Cause, no offense, but that was a shitty transition. And, come on, no one wants a Notebook love story anymore. Who writes those? What we need is a little romance and a whole lotta smut."
"What the hell are you talking about?"
"Me? Nothing, just giving some feedback. I've always had an open relationship with writers. Some might even call me the next J.K Rowling. Except, instead of a lighting scar and magic, I have an ass load of weapons with an insatiable lust for violence and blood. And tacos."
You decided to ignore him.
"Anyway, back to you. You never answered my question. Do you have a name or not?"
"I can’t believe I actually agreed to give you a ride home."
"Yeah," he said, sounding bored. "Why did you do that?"
"I don’t know. Because I hit you with my car and felt bad? You had a broken arm and were bleeding out all over the ground."
"First sign of insanity."
"What?"
"Nothing," his mask wiggled around the area of his eyebrows. "So, your name? Don’t tell me you’re gonna pull out the classic yes and no abbreviations. You know what? I’m just gonna call you Spidey. It's easier, and it’ll sound sexier when you're screaming it later."
You rolled your eyes, deciding just to ignore his comments for the rest of the drive. You were wishing that you didn't live in a city full of traffic cause, damn, this was taking a while.
"Alright, turn here."
You followed the directions and pulled up in front of an abandoned-looking building. You didn't say anything, but you did raise an eyebrow in question.
"What? A guy like me has to keep his place secret, especially when the fangirls are after him."
"I didn’t ask."
"Yeah, but I saw you wondering."
"Right."
"Hey, Spidey," he said, unbuckling his seat belt. "Thanks for the ride."
"No problem. Just make sure to keep your ass away from car bumpers. And out of my car."
"Awe, come on, baby cakes, don't be like that. You're really missing out. My ass is the finest in the business. Not to mention my package. You should see the reviews I get online."
You snorted. "I'll take your word for it."
"Yeah, you will," he said, leaning over and patting your cheek. "Hey, if you ever get lonely, or bored, or horny, or whatever, just give me a call. Here," he handed you a crumpled piece of paper. "Don't lose it, that's my number. We should totally bang, like, tomorrow, or tonight, or right now."
"Goodbye, Wade," you said, and he took it as his cue to leave. He gave a silly salute and exited the car, but not without giving you a wink first.
"See you soon, Spidey!"
With that, he walked up to the building and disappeared inside. With a sigh, you collapsed into the seat, not even bothering to watch him. You were exhausted, and all you wanted was to go home and sleep.
After a couple of minutes of relishing the nice breeze that came through the open windows, you sat up and un-crinkled the paper.
The only thing written on it was a phone number, with a small, messy, red heart and a few words that honestly had you questioning the sanity of the world:
'If you're lucky, maybe I'll even let you top. ;)'
——
Spoiler alert: it took about a month for the two of you to hook up.
And no, you did not have Domino’s luck.
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bamjio · 4 months ago
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❛ 𝗷𝘂𝗶𝗰𝘆! ❜ ━━ ✿⠀wolverine nsfw headcanonns.
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Wolverine x female!reader
warnings !! ━ suggestive content, voyeurism, kinks, mentions of wade n other xmen members, lovesick Logan teehee, specifically Hughs' wolverine.
❛If you could see it from the front, wait 'til you see it from the back.❜
( wtf happened to me this is the fastest update I had probably done ever since WVD came out. )
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Start of strong start of tough,
LOGAN HAS A MASSIVE DICK, you've seen it and he knows it. def loves teasing you too, when you give him oral, he wants you to take your time— sometimes. most of the times he's a sex devil, obsessed with seeing your hardworking struggled face, eyebrows furrowed and eyes determined. Logan hates to admit it but he wants to shove his cock down you and seeing your face. won't admit because he's not freaky outside.
gives the best head in the whole dimension, loves seeing you arch, he def knows where your spots are, multi tasking at its finest, fingering and eating you out is definitely something, his only goal is making you either squirt of cum, doesn't matter loves it when you make that sound everytimes you're close. he's 99.9 Selfless when it comes to giving, all he wants is your attention, not caring if his dick exploded from holding it in, deep inside him is a man that def wants to tease and edge you, but he's known to you as a nonchalant man, unless he's desperate — hell definitely be a beast.
did I mention that he's quite rough? not too rough, but perfectly rough. he adores it when tears run out your cheeks begging him to keep on going, although he is naturally rough, he knows his limits, it's like autopilot tbh. puts you to missionary everytime. He's not a lazy man he knows how to move, and his stamina would definitely last up to many hours. An old man with a young energy, how nice is that.
have I mentioned he has deep fantasies? He's the type of boyfriend that won't mention it till you do— he had desires of maybe fucking you in charles' mansion, he doesn't mean in a room, he means infront of his colleague, yknow? but he keeps that fantasy deep behind, Charles knows about his little dream, finds it fascinating. only person he told about it was probably Hank. He also has this predator and prey kink that ONLY works for you, you running for your life and him chasing you down, basically fuck or die type shit— except he'd rather not kill you.
he gets turned on whenever you're training or fighting, doesn't know why but he definitely loves the sweat on your face and the look of distraught, he wonders sometimes if he's okay, wade calls him lovesick because he's like a little puppy following you and finding you very amusing, not to mention he's very obedient too, wade tells him he's a "pup in a big man's body when it comes to y/n" he doesn't deny it, he likes it.
One secret— you two fucked in the mansion and almost got caught, risky but he'd do it again.
Two secrets— he unintentionally told wade that he had thought about him and wade fucking you.
Three secrets— he has pictures hidden, different boxes in different occasions full of your pictures.
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HELP, MY PUSSYS' GONE CRAZY!
First post that I felt 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂, will make a sfw version of this and will make a wade nsfw version, probably the last time I make nsfw hcs, don wanna go overboard to being 𝓯𝓻𝓮𝓪𝓴𝔂.
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foxmulderautism · 1 year ago
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beau is such a trailblazer of an oc cause he's the first dallonwrites protagonist to have a good relationship with his family
#LMAOOOO LIKE#i know they're the type of family who would have a group chat together and that concept is so wildly foreign to me#my relationship w my family is actually fine dw it's just like all recovering from things. we make do#felix and dorothy were definitely like the product of me fully realising i had a fucked up childhood and not being able to get therapy#i think my whole pov on it is changing now though which is interesting#like i havent outgrown RR but i would never write the things i decided for that story if i came up with it now#but 20 year old me wanted to write about those things for a reason so it's almost become a time capsule#i actually have sooo many thoughts of this because my brain is so interesting to me lately#recently more often than not i hate reading characters with fucked up childhoods from other writers#idk why but i'm just like. i want the kids left alone for the most part!#some more than others and its like i dont know what the reasoning is because its not like i can know where their inspo is coming from#(that's another thing i want to write about one day because i do think some people esp newer writers like#don't fully know how to write an interesting backstory yet or aren't confident in it so they lean on#very traumatic childhood things like abuse neglect addiction etc.#and without saying what I Went Through it's very interesting when you see things you went through IRL#that for others are just like interesting character development ideas#NOT TO MAKE ANYONE FEEL BAD! because i mean i do and have done it before with things irrelevant to me#it's just something i've noticed and like. i think easy to sensationalise when you're a newer writer#even things you HAVE gone through)#not me testing the waters for essays in the side blog tags again. i need to actually write something for my silly little substack#actually similarly to this i rly want to write abt how i can't get with the whole my old writing is so bad and cringe!!! anymore#bc now i know younger me was in such a scary place and needed those cringey stores#but i need to do it in a specific way bc i dont think that line of thinking is problematic. i just cant do it
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cathnospam · 21 days ago
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Posttimeskip/Canon!Bakugo Katsuki NSFW Alphabet
Thanks for 100 follows :-P
(((Black girlfriend reader mentioned a few times, if you are not black or a girl you can obviously ignore it.)))
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A = Aftercare (what they’re like after sex)
You were his first everything so with that you wanted to teach him just a few things like aftercare. However, Bakugo already had to down to a science. He didn’t like sleeping in sweat and cum so he’d offer you to take a shower while he puts new sheets on the bed and he joins you a little later. He noticed how thirsty you get after so he’d bring a water bottle and some juice/tea, maybe even a sweet snack if you don’t fall asleep too soon. A lot of this stuff was common sense except the cuddle part. It’s not like he didn’t want to hold you after it was just awkward for him. He just had you cross eye’d and crying on his dick now you him to be held and babied? But after some reassurance that you definitely do and you also wanted to make sure if you did good. “Of course you did dumbass you always do.” Is what he could huff out hearing such nonsense.
Post nut clarity Bakugo is softer, more touchier somehow and quiet. He’d much rather hear your yapping and he just responds with “Yeah.” “Of course” “No. dumbass” with a lot of kissing in between of course
B = Body part (their favorite body part of theirs and also their partner’s)
Yeah we all know he loves ass. He does, shamelessly so, smacking it while eating you out, smacking it when your back is faced him, patting it while you lay on his lap . But he loves your lips just as much. They’re like pillows, bouncy, and incredibly soft. It’s like a sweet flavor as well knowing you always have different types of lipgloss to wear.
I don’t think he is very particular of any part of his body, but since dating you, you love to talk about his back and arms, the way you hug him from behind or grab onto his arm walking through a crowd. More importantly how you scratch his back when he’s inside you and claw his shoulders when he keeps overstimulating you. It’s become partial motivation to his workout now.
C = Cum (anything to do with cum, basically)
Bakugo actually practices safe sex 90% of the time. He isn’t prepared to have any children yet and he doesn’t want any scares so he does at least buy the ULTRA thin condoms. However. The day you finally let him w/o a condom for his birthday he almost came faster than usual which actually made him upset LMAOO.
“What the—F-FFUCK!”
“Y-Y’ok—“
“I AM!…just…fuck this feel good.”
So he will cum in you or on your ass, and smack it with his dick because he seems clean but he’s such a dirty bastard at heart.
D = Dirty secret (pretty self explanatory, a dirty secret of theirs)
He doesn’t keep many secrets from you but the few are really only justified. The first one was that when you both were making out for the first time you grinded against his semi hard dick and he let out a soft moan in your mouth. You never pointed it out but it sounded so hot and it almost threw him off because he never made that noise before. After that, for the next few months before you both finally had sex he thought of that feeling alone to get off when masturbating. Not his finest moment but he couldn’t help it.
He likes when you pull his hair but you only did it once and he’ll be damned if he asks you to do it again. Do it again
Another one would be when you and him were just talking and not having sex yet he used to only watch porn where the people looked similar to you. So he’d sometimes type up Asian guy x black girl or some shit. He was actually using it to mentally prepare himself for when he does fuck you and it’s something he isn’t ready to ever tell you because he knows getting sex advice from porn is absolutely terrible.
Speaking of getting prepared he also asked Kiri for some advice on how to eat you out. Bakugo used to watch a lot of oral sex videos and honestly he really was most nervous about that part, he’s aware he wasn’t the best kisser at first and the last thing he wanted to do was bite you or something so he simply asked his best friend that loss his virginity before him the question: “Where is the clit?”
He swore Kiri to secrecy to never speak of that conversation again after that.
E = Experience (how experienced are they? do they know what they’re doing?)
A virgin up until he dated you. Like I said you’re his first everything so teaching him was actually something you were expected to do, however his pride always got the best of him so when you corrected him he’d always get pissy.
“My clit is here—“
“I fucking know that.”
So instead of verbally telling him what to do you you showed him with your body, moaning louder when he hits or licks the right spot, praising him when he uses the right move. He caught onto this quick and by the time it was the 2nd round he was damn near perfect
F = Favorite position (this goes without saying)
A lot of people say backshots but I personally think Lotus and honorable mention is missionary Hear me out: Bakugo gives vanilla. He just does he doesn’t need all the special positions and areas to fuck he just wants you, him, and a comfortable surface preferably a bed or couch. He doesn’t want to be perceived as some sex freak or anything he is very simple when it comes to sex. Mostly because he’s so shy but won’t admit it.
The Lotus Position is something that actually overwhelms him in the best way possible. Your foreheads touching, your breast pushed up against his as he assist your push to keep grinding and bouncing against him, FUCK does he love the noises you make in his ear when you’re close too, biting him as you cum. He kisses you a lot too to swallow some of your sounds. How your hands creep onto his neck moaning his name. Plus he is squeezing your ass as you both move in sync. He loves it.
Missionary is almost a ties in because he feels he has the most control. Yeah he can be soft but he still loves to be in charge. He likes the intimacy that comes with these positions so best believe it’s a go to.
G = Goofy (are they more serious in the moment? are they humorous? etc.)
Unintentionally. He has always been so funny to you, but he likes it believe he is serious during sex. Yet you can’t help but giggle when he makes a comment about blaming you for making him get so close to cumming.
H = Hair (how well groomed are they? does the carpet match the drapes? etc.)
He has a visible happy trail. Doesn’t grow much so he never needs to trim it, he was going to cut it off the day after you had sex with him the first time and you were able to stop him. Bakugo wanted to make his pelvic area smooth for you because he was worried his hair was itchy to you, once you explained it felt good to feel it on your pussy when he fucked you he haven’t touched it since.
I = Intimacy (how are they during the moment? the romantic aspect)
Well….he can try. You can tell when he tries but bless his heart he is so damn aggressive on accident. He once tried to give you a massage but his own sweat mixed with the oil cause his hand to slip so much to the point he got mad and pop a small explosion on your lower back.
You still have the small burn mark and laugh at it from time to time. He doesn’t laugh though he regrets it a lot.
J = Jack off (masturbation headcanon)
He masturbates…often. He has for years and even after graduating high school he only did it every other day or week when he was really tense or couldn’t sleep. But ever since he got with you it stopped.
Because you do it for him.
K = Kink (one or more of their kinks)
He’d tell you he doesn’t have any. Which is half true.
He is pretty vanilla, BUT from the last few times you tried something new you noticed he enjoyed a couple things:
Overstimulation is always fun, he used to do it on accident. Now, it’s almost expected to happen after oral or penetrative sex. Something about that second orgasm really puts him in a whole ‘ other cloud 9 he can’t even explain. It’s the rarest times he’s ever selfish with you sexually.
Praise Kink 100000%. It’s so funny to see the frustrated look on his face of focusing to not cum when you’re in his ear telling him how amazing he is and how nobody else could make you feel this way. Gets him hard every time.
L = Location (favorite places to do the do)
He does enjoy the bed, but he has a huge couch in his dorm, he ate you out a few times during a movie and it led to you on top riding him. It felt so cozy falling asleep after that now 90% of the movie nights y’all have in his dorm leads to something not so wholesome.
M = Motivation (what turns them on, gets them going)
You.
Your reactions, your twitches, your moans, the way you say his name it all drives him more to keep going and practicing to get better for you. He absolutely loses his MIND the way you cry out for him too.
N = No (something they wouldn’t do, turn offs)
He will not ever do anything like humiliation or too much violence like slapping your face. He knows he can be abrasive as it is on accident and even the thought of going to far and harming you would possibly cause him to take a pause on sex no matter how much he loves it
I am 50/50 on somno. I believe he wants you alert to what he’s doing to you for his own peace of mind. But he wouldn’t be opposed to him waking up to YOU touching him.
He’s not a big fan of “daddy”, he won’t stop what he’s doing but he’d rather hear his name or “baby” or even a nickname you made out of his name.
You will not peg him. He is very sensitive about his ass.
No threesomes or anybody watching. Call him selfish, but your body is his in his mind so he’d prefer if nobody sees what you have only blessed him with.
O = Oral (preference in giving or receiving, skill, etc.)
LOVES giving. Way more than he will admit, there has been days where he’d finish sparring with someone and to release the stress he had from Deku almost beating his ass again he came to your dorm and offered to lay between your thighs as you studied.
You didn’t get much studying done.
He’s improved on his skill too. However he’s constantly messy, it’s not just kitten licks with this man he sucks and fingers and even nibbles on you like he’ll never eat you again. It’s almost selfish.
He loves the feel of your pussy against his tongue, he doesn’t taste much. If you were to ask him what you taste like he would say nothing, really but the warm, slimy slick just does something to him. If he could he’d eat you for hours
Now that doesn’t mean he doesn’t love seeing you gag and swallow his dick absolutely not. When you both started getting more physical you actually sucked his dick quite often (since he was afraid to eat you out at the time) he would actually anticipate on it whenever you both were alone so he’d keep his sweats incredibly low to his waist on purpose
P = Pace (are they fast and rough? slow and sensual? etc.)
Bakugo an intense guy so he starts off slow and his touches gradually turn more focused towards your reactions. He’s consistently looking into your eyes with every noise you make, each thrust is deep and nearly knocks the wind out of you. It’s not until he’s close he begins to chase that high, breathing into your mouth, circling your clit w his fingers, and going faster with slightly shallow thrusts.
He’s a big kisser btw so be prepared for little to no air because if he’s not kissing your low lips he’s kissing your upper lips with each thrust swallowing your cries
Q = Quickie (their opinions on quickies, how often, etc.)
Hates em.
The idea is always fun to him but when he realizes he has to stop right when he’s getting started he hates it. He wants to take his time. He probably enjoys foreplay the most which is why he can’t stand having to make it short.
R = Risk (are they game to experiment? do they take risks? etc.)
Bakugo is pretty stubborn and doesn’t like too much change but if you’re willing to reassure him about what you want he may consider. It can’t be any of the no though.
S = Stamina (how many rounds can they go for? how long do they last?)
Man can last a while. He can even if he’s sensitive, but he can last EVEN LONGER in between breaks. Just as long as you cock warm him. An average night of sex with him is usually 30-35 minutes, but including foreplay is actually an all day thing. Foreplay can start from the moment you wake up and he’s kissing you good morning all the way to that evening when you both are showering together and his fingers are creeping between your thighs
T = Toys (do they own toys? do they use them? on a partner or themselves?)
Doesn’t understand toys but if you’re willing pick like a vibrator he wouldn’t mind it. You just can’t use it too much, he has read those things can fuck up your sensitivity and he’ll be DAMNED if he loses to a TOY
U = Unfair (how much they like to tease)
Bakugo actually wasn’t that much of a teaser until you brought it out of him. When he went down on your once he kept kissing and biting your thighs for WAY too long that you began to whine his name. Once he heard that pretty little “please” slip through your tongue something just snapped. He loves to hear you beg now so occasionally he’ll edge you or tease you a bit before giving you what you want.
V = Volume (how loud they are, what sounds they make, etc.)
He’s not that loud. A few mumbles of your name and a couple groans is the most you’ll get because he wants to hear you more. When he’s close he’ll begin to say a few “cum with me” “cum for me’s” which is so hot to hear since his voice breaks when he’s cumming
W = Wild card (a random headcanon for the character)
He learned sign language through out the years after finding out his hearing was becoming worse and he taught you as well. Now you both communicate in public through SL, and a few times he said the nastiest shit to you across the room during a lecture.
Bonus: He’s a big Pokémon nerd. Loves Gengar, Charizard, and Growlithe.
Bonus two: He has a secret tattoo he got when he turned 21
X = X-ray (let’s see what’s going on under those clothes)
Bakugo is a more length than girth guy. He’s a shower and cut. About 7.8ish inches and it curves to the left. He also had a beauty mark on the left side of his shaft and pelvic area.
Y = Yearning (how high is their sex drive?)
Y’all have sex about 4-5 times a week. If yall miss a week spike it up to 6 because he needs to release some stress
Z = Zzz (how quickly they fall asleep afterwards)
You fall asleep before him so after taking care of you and cleaning you up he usually waits until you’re sleep and follows suit. Sometimes when you’re still yapping and he’s ready to go to bed he’ll gently fan your eyelids to close with his fingers. Somehow it works everytime and you slowly stop talking a dm cuddle in his chest.
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fangirl-dot-com · 7 months ago
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🪡The Obvious String
*part of the reverse trope series*
Paring: Lestappen x MercedesDriver!Reader Genre: SMAU/Fluff/Humor Summary: The invisible string was so visible that everyone missed it but them. What are they? Rivals? Friends? Emotional Support Buddies? But they can't be lovers . . . can they?
*I took a lot of inspo from people on twitter. I think this is the most work I've ever done for a chapter before. the tweets alone took almost two hours to do. I absolutely love lestappen so this is super self-indulgent. but that's why I'm a writer. I hope you all enjoy!*
TAG LIST IS CLOSED
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Lando knew that there was something between the three of them. 
Anyone could see that. Instagram, twitter, TikTok, hell even the Formula 1 app was talking about it. The grid was getting very suspicious, but who could blame them. 
Max wasn’t putting out the fire by pulling his two childhood friends in as they posed for pictures. Charles couldn’t help but flash his God-given dimples at the Dutchman or the Briton girl. And Y/n, she was just as bad, blush on her cheeks every moment she was around them. 
So yeah, everyone was talking. But, no one truly knew what exactly was going on. 
And that’s exactly what Lando was going to find out. (With the help of his fellow 16 drivers.)
His first victim: the French bestie of the non-French man. 
“I have no clue what is going on between the three,” was the first thing that came out of Pierre’s mouth when Lando showed up to his driver’s room door. The poor McLaren driver hadn’t even gotten a word out. 
Lando rolled his eyes. “You have to know something. And you call yourself Charles’s best mate.” 
Pierre threw his hands up. “Non, apparently that is Y/n and Max. I’ve been kicked to the side.” 
The Alpine driver definitely wasn’t bitter or anything. He was actually thankful that you and Max had been able to keep an eye on Charles when he couldn’t. Knowing that the Monegasque had frequent delf-deprecating thoughts, he felt better that he had the two of you. 
Pierre turned to Lando. “Aren’t you supposed to Max’s best friend as well? How would I know something that you don’t.” 
Now that made Lando’s brows furrow. He was supposed to be Max’s best friend. And maybe that’s why he felt a bit peeved to not know what was supposedly going on between you, him, and Charles. His arms crossed in front of his chest. 
“I’m going to get to the bottom of this,” he muttered, turning away to the door. 
The Frenchman scoffed. “Good luck mate. We’ve been trying since 2019.” 
“We?” 
Lewis was not expecting the numerous knocks at his door during media day. The Briton held his breath, willing the unexpected visitors to give up and go away. Yet, a sigh left his lips once the knocking started up again. He pulled himself off of his couch and walked over. 
When the door swung in, two bodies brushed against his side. 
His eye brows raised. “Yes, welcome. Come right in. Oh, thank you Lewis for allowing us to disturb your peace.” 
Lando chewed his lip. “Yeah, thanks man.” 
Pierre took a look around the room. “Thank you Lewis.” 
The papaya clad driver took a seat exactly where Lewis’s had been sitting, which cause Lewis to glare at him. 
“And why are the two of you here?” 
Pierre huffed, looking at the pictures on Lewis’s wall. 
“Ask him.” A finger pointed at Lando, making the Briton look up from his phone. 
“Oh yeah. Do you know. . . ”
Once again, Lando couldn’t even finish his sentence because Lewis interrupted him. 
“No, I don’t know what’s going on between Y/n, Max, and Charles. Honestly Lando, no one knows and I don’t think they know either.” 
Lando leaned his head back and groaned. 
“But how could they not? They all make goo-goo eyes at each other. And it’s worse on the podium.” 
“At least you haven’t bit on the podium with two-thirds of the groups. It’s insufferable man. They can’t go without talking about each other for more than a few moments.”
A laugh left Pierre’s lips. “Oh yeah. It’s always ‘Y/n was so strong on corner 2’ or ‘Pierre, did you see how Max overtook Checo?’ And then ‘Oh Charles was told to stay behind again. He really needs to ignore them.’ It makes me want to puke every time.” 
Lando scratched his chin. “Now that I’m thinking about it, you’re right. It was like how Max and Charles completely ignored me in China. They kept looking at Y/n below!” 
The last few words had a slight whine to them. Charles had been quick enough to catch Checo on the last lap, and placed himself in P3 after Lando. 
The Alpine driver looked lost. “Lewis, you’ve been Y/n’s teammate for almost three years. How can you not know anything.” 
All he got was a glare back. 
“Like I said, Gasly, I don’t even think they know something is going on. It’s pathetic honestly.” 
Lando put his head in his hands. “She must be pining. Don’t you two do girls night or at least something like that?” 
“Lando, she spends all her free moments with Max and Charles. How can she be pining to me if she doesn’t leave their side.” 
It was quite for a moment before Lando snapped. 
“I’ve got it. If we want grid gossip, we got to go to the source.” 
“No Lando, I don’t know if Max, Charles, and Y/n are in a secret relationship. And I don’t think they think of each other like that.” 
The groan that Lando let out was so loud it made a couple of people look their way. George, the tall, lanky Briton was set to take Lewis’s seat for 2025 after two years in Williams. The driver pool was going crazy. 
Logan was returning to Formula 1 with HAAS after a brief sabbatical and would be a teammate pair with Oliver Bearman. Nico and Daniel of all people were going to Audi. Liam was set to take the second Red Bull seat. And Carlos, well, no one really knew, but rumors said that he was going to return with Audi when they caught up with the regulations in 2027. 
The McLaren driver was close to pulling his curls out. 
“But George.” 
Lando was now full on whining. George seemed exasperated and shrugged. 
“We’re not that close anyway. We aren’t even teammates yet. And you knew how she yelled at me that one time that my car scraped a hole in Max’s car.” 
The group of four winced at the memory. 
Max had just finished yelling at George, calling him every name under the sun. And then you had shown up to double it. The Williams, well, now Mercedes driver, was thankful that Charles had shown up to drag the two of you away. 
Lewis looked a bit pale. 
“Yeah. I don’t think she’s fully forgiven me for Silverstone 2021.” 
Lando turned to Lewis. “But they were all still fighting at that point. Remember the whole unfollowing they did in 2019?” 
Pierre snorted. “Of course we remember. That doesn’t mean that they didn’t still care about each other. You know that Charles and Y/n were the first ones to congratulate Max after he won the championship in Abu Dhabi. And then her and Max practically tackled Charles in Japan in 2022. I don’t even want to imagine when Y/n wins her championship.”  
Lando ran a hand down his face. 
“Well, if Pierre doesn’t know, Lewis and George don’t know. Then who would?” 
George cocked his head. 
“Have you asked Daniel? You know that he and Max are pretty close.” 
Lando’s eyes widened. “Why did I not think of that. George I could kiss you!” 
George’s face scrunched. “No thank you. I don’t want to be anywhere near your lips.” 
Lewis was already at the door, wanting to get a move on. “Let’s go. George you’re coming too. If we get to the bottom of this, you’re going to have to learn how to deal with all three.” 
A shudder ran down George’s spine. He did not want to imagine the horror of sharing a podium with all of them. He’s heard enough stories. 
When they got to Daniel’s motorhome, the Australian was peacefully talking with Oscar. Lando had run up to them and was currently hunched over, trying to catch his breath. 
“Do,” inhale, “you two,” exhale, “know if,” inhale and heave, “there’s something,” exhale, “going on,” inhale, “with. . .”
Daniel sighed. “Max, Charles, and Y/n?” 
Lando shot up, eyes full of hope. Lewis nodded next to him. 
“Yes! Do you?” 
The older Aussie wanted to smirk as he saw hope fill the group’s faces. He nodded a bit, and Lando looked like someone told him that his birthday and Christmas had come early. 
“No.” 
The McLaren driver fell to the ground. Pierre smacked Daniel on the shoulder. 
“Why would you do that!” 
Now Lewis was the one whining. 
“Because it was funny. Mate, they’ve been like this since Max joined in 2018. Even then, it was worse than whatever this is.” 
The Mercedes driver of the group let out another groan for what felt like the millionth time in that hour. 
“Max was insufferable in 2018. Taking his sim everywhere so that he could game and race with them online. And the multiple phone calls. I think Max partied harder for Charles’s F2 champion win and Y/n’s F3 championship than his first race win.” 
“Ok, but that’s kind of cute.” 
All eyes landed on Oscar. 
The younger Aussie’s eyes bulged. “What?” 
Daniel pointed a finger at him. “If Max hears you say cute in any way, shape, or form that is distinctly near his name, he will come after you.”  
An audible gulp was heard. 
Lando had begun to pace. “Well, if I don’t know, Pierre doesn’t know, Lewis doesn’t know, George doesn’t know, Oscar doesn’t know, and Daniel doesn’t know, then who would know?”
Everyone looked a little lost. 
“Aha!” 
The two papaya drivers jumped out of reflex. Lando’s head turned violently toward Lewis. 
“What!” 
He held his phone up with a contact showing. 
“We call Seb.” 
“Lewis, like I’ve told you. Charles hasn’t told me anything.” 
For the sake of everyone around in the paddock, they held in their groans. 
“But Seb, you were practically Charles’s grid-dad. You have to know something!” Daniel said, face nearly in Lewis’s phone, as if Sebastian could hear him better. 
A sigh was heard through the speaker. 
“Charles was nothing less than a terror in 2019. I think the calmest anyone has seen him was 2018 when his car didn’t go fast enough for him to catch anyone.” 
Lewis hummed. “That’s true.” 
“Because everyone there should know that 2019 was the year of them. Every headline was all about them. And don’t get me started on when they had that big fight. I had to hear everything about it every. single. weekend.” 
Daniel nodded. “It was the same with Max. If Fernando was here, he could say the same for Y/n since she was still racing with Alpine at the time.” 
Oscar had completely forgotten about Fernando being Y/n’s teammate for half a season before she made the jump to Williams to replace Kubica to race alongside Nicholas Latiffi. The young Aussie had looked up to the older female when he was making the decision to leave Alpine. She had personally congratulated him on the move and gave him a wink. Well, had tried to before Max and Charles dragged her away. 
Sebastian had gone quiet over the phone. 
“Has anyone actually asked them if they’re together or not? Instead of just asking everyone else about a matter that deeply involves the three of them?” 
Their silence had answered for them. 
Lando grabbed Lewis’s phone out of his hand. 
“Thank you Seb! We’ll get right on it!” 
“Hey!” 
It was too late and Lando had already hung up and was passing the phone back to his fellow Briton. 
“Guys, we can’t ask them.” 
“What!” Pierre yelled. 
“Think about it. If we just go and ask, they’re going to make excuses. We won’t get a right answer.” 
“Lando, you’re being unreal. Let’s just go ask them,” George said. 
“Ask them what?” 
The six of them jumped out of their skin at the new arrival of a familiar voice. Lando froze before slowly turning around, to come face to face with you, Charles, and Max, all looking cozy for media day. 
“Uh, nothing?” Lando squeaked out, eyes darting around so he wouldn’t have to look at the trio. 
Max snorted. “Doesn’t sound like nothing to me.” 
He took a sip of his Red Bull. 
Daniel looked panicked. “We were just wanting to ask, uh, Lewis and Nico if they had forgiven each other yet?” 
“Hey!” 
Charles raised his eyebrows. “Why do you seem so unsure? And Lewis is right there mate. Kind of rude to talk about his problems in front of him.” 
“Thank you Charles.” 
The Monegasque hummed as he turned to Max. His mouth dropped. 
“Max, I thought I told you to stop drinking that stuff. It’s bad for your heart.” 
The Dutchman shrugged and took another sip, just to spite the Ferrari driver. You rolled your eyes, knowing a playfight was just around the corner. 
Oscar’s eyes narrowed as he looked over the trio’s choice of outfits. 
“Y/n, are those Charles’s cloud pants? Charles is that Max’s cap? And Max is that Charles’s Monza hoodie.” 
The arguing that was beginning to build between the two male drivers suddenly stopped. Your eyes widened as you jerked your head toward them. 
Sure enough, Charles’s hat was not bright red and it had the number 1 on it, something that Charles lost to Max in 2023. You leaned back to look at the hoodie Max was wearing, and indeed it had the iconic podium scene on the back of it. The two males looked toward your pants. The bright white clouds seemed to stare back at them. 
“Uh, yes?” you asked. “But we share clothes all the time. It’s not a big deal.” 
Max and Charles nodded before Charles was hit with a thought. 
“Oh, chéri, I forgot to tell you that your dry cleaning was picked up a few hours ago and is back at the hotel,” he said as he looked at his phone, completely missing the six pairs of wide eyes that were now looking at him. 
Max smirked as he leaned over and kissed the top of Charles’s head. 
“Thank you schatje.” 
This time, a whine came from you. 
“I’m being left out,” you muttered, crossing your arms. However, the two were not having it and quickly brought you into their arms. 
Lando stared, blinked, and stared some more before he rubbed his eyes. He completely believed that the three would disappear when his hands lowered, but he caught Max in the middle of kissing your lips. 
“WHAT?” 
You turned back to the group. 
“Are you all fine?” 
Lewis threw his hands up. “I’m done. Call me when we need to go to the media.” 
The door opened quickly, allowing Lewis to slip out. 
Pierre looked a bit pale. “What? When? Where? Why?”
Charles shrugged. “We’re together. After my championship. The hotel. We love each other.” 
Daniel sighed. “So you’ve been together since 2022?” 
Max rolled his eyes. “No.” 
“But Charles just said his championship!” Oscar explained, hands outstretched. 
It was your turn to smile. “His F2 championship. We’ve been together since 2017.” 
A long sigh came from Lando. “I think I need to sit down.” 
Daniel’s door swung back open, revealing Lewis once again. He also seemed out of breath. His hands were on his knees for a bit until he straightened back up. 
“You’re telling me that you three have been together SINCE 2017!” 
You nodded. “Yes.” 
Pierre pouted. “But what about 2019?” 
The three of you winced in a synchronized matter. With a quick look, Max was the one to sigh. His hands dug into the front pocket of the cozy, black hoodie. 
“Long story short, we took a small break until Y/n won in Brazil. We all got our heads out of our asses and apologized.” 
Oscar rose an eyebrow. “Then why haven’t you followed each other back on Instagram.”
A snort from you made the two men chuckle. You simply shrugged your shoulders. 
“Too lazy? We don’t feel like breaking the internet.” 
Lando took a seat on Daniel’s couch. “Why haven’t you told anyone?” 
Charles ran a hand over his face. “Lando, we race in countries where people are killed for being homosexual. We can’t risk anything.” 
The air suddenly took a solemn turn as the McLaren driver nodded, truly taking in the situation. Charles chewed his lip in anxiety, while Max picked at his fingers. You were looking at the group. 
“You won’t tell anyone right?” 
Suddenly, everyone felt bad for wanting to find out. They had pushed the three to confess something that they might not have wanted people to know about at that time. What a group of friends they were. 
Lando hung his head. “We won’t. I’m sorry that we asked about it before you three were obviously ready to tell someone.” 
Another snort left Charles’s lips as his hand rested on his mouth. Max had a shit-eating grin on his face, you had one to match. 
Pierre looked at them with a skeptical expression. “Something to tell us?” 
Max’s shoulders raised. “People know. You aren’t the first ones to know.” 
Lewis sighed, shoulder sagging. George put a hand on the older Briton’s shoulder, trying to offer some comfort. Lando looked close to losing it. His hazel eyes narrowed at the trio. 
“Then . . . who knows?” 
Charles’s eyes looked up a bit as he started to count. 
“Uh, Christian, Fred, Toto, Kimi.” 
You pulled out his fingers and counted.  
“Jensen, Mark, uh, Nico.” 
Lewis looked like he wanted to pass out. 
Max smirked. 
“Oh, and Seb.” 
There was silence amongst the group. 
“Oh he is so dead.” 
“Lando you can’t kill Seb!” 
“Sorry Lewis, but this is his fault!” 
“Calm down Lando. You’ll lose your seat.” 
“Oscar, I just want to talk to Seb. Who has his phone number?” 
“I am not giving you his number Lando.” 
“I’m not asking you Lewis. Daniel, I know you have it.” 
You smiled in Max and Charles’s arms as Lando started to get physical, trying to grab Daniel’s phone. 
You leaned up, immediately being engulfed in Max’s aftershave. “Should we stop them?” 
Charles leaned a bit forward to look at his two lovers. A soft smile formed on his face, before a smirk replaced it. 
“Nah.” 
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