#i am. immensely enjoying this world quest

[protect-namine]

man this world quest is making me think of whenever I see articles about "AI." which I knoooow is just a conversational shorthand for something that isn't really AI, and we gotta sacrifice accuracy for marketing or simplified reporting, but inside I'm like...... but this isn't really AI......... but if you explain all that stuff people aren't gonna read it anyway........ man. scicomm is hard

also, man, nacker has the patience of a saint the way he just rolls with chronie's sometimes bad faith style journalism lmao

[chonideno]

literally where can the zelda franchise go after totk. this is it. we've reached it. the pinnacle of video game entertainment. the whole dev team should just pack their stuff and enjoy a long and comfortable retirement. whoever decides their team has to follow-up on that with the next zelda game should answer for their crimes at the hague. what the fuck. I haven't even beat the game yet but what the fuck.

and how are AAA video game devs everywhere not losing their minds. how the hell did nintendo do any of that? and on that console?? you mean to tell me I can stack 15 differently shaped objects on top of each other and they don't vibrate violently into the skybox?? you mean to tell me the physics engine gladly accepts whatever I throw at it and holds it all together without dropping a frame while running on a machine that was outclassed two generations ago??? this is not witchcraft it's a grandiose demonstration of mastery over every aspect of game development that casts an immense shadow over every other AAA studio. fuck. fuck!!!!

everything about this game is crazy to me. the visuals are crazy. the soudtrack is crazy. the complexity of all systems and how they interact is crazy. the sheer amount of non-repeating content, NPCs, quests, dialogue, puzzles, environment variety - all crazy to me. every time I boot up this game I am humbled by the monumental effort and obvious love that went into every facet of the resulting experience. no cut corners anywhere. mirror-perfect chrome polish.

it's so rare we get something like that, in any field. I'd understand if nintendo never made a zelda game ever again because how do you follow that. god I hope everyone who worked on this game got the fattest check and the sloppiest head. I'm so happy I get to live in shigeru miyamoto's world

[shisasan]

Picking a single favourite quote might be an impossible task so which quote (or quotes) do you seem to come back to more often than others?

Picking a single favorite quote might truly be an impossible task because there are so many brilliant writers out there whose words have deeply influenced my life. These extraordinary souls have breathed new life into me when I was ready to give up on everything. Without any particular order, these quotes are not intended to enlighten or educate anyone but offer a brief insight into the words I turn to for comfort, inspiration, or understanding when I'm not at my highest self.

I'll begin with my most dearest Hermann Hesse, whom I like to call my Alpha and Omega. He transformed my life from a young age, opening mysterious portals to other worlds and making me feel deeply understood, embraced, with a true sense of belonging. His writing not only awakened my mind to new realms of thought and emotion but also offered immense solace and companionship through his exploration of the human spirit:

"A wild longing for strong emotions and sensations seethes in me, a rage against this toneless, flat, normal, and sterile life."

"I have always thirsted for knowledge, I have always been full of questions."

"We have to stumble through so much dirt and humbug before we reach home. And we have no one to guide us. Our only guide is our homesickness."

Rainer Maria Rilke, a beautiful and tender infinite soul, whose writings deeply resonate with the complexities of the human condition and the relentless quest for understanding:

"I am dark, I am forest."

"I grow strong in the beauty you behold. And with the silence of stars, I enfold your cities made by time."

"Do not now seek the answers, which cannot be given you because you would not be able to live them. And the point is, to live everything. Live the questions now. Perhaps you will then gradually, without noticing it, live along some distant day into the answer."

Novalis, who occupies a cherished place in my heart for his poetic and deeply insightful exploration of life and love.

"We are eternal because we love each other."

"I often feel, and ever more deeply I realize, that fate and character are the same conception."

"Sometimes with the most intense pain a paralysis of sensibility occurs. The soul disintegrates—hence the deadly frost—the free power of the mind—the shattering, ceaseless wit of this kind of despair. There is no inclination for anything anymore—the person is alone, like a baleful power—as he has no connection with the rest of the world he consumes himself gradually—and in accordance with his own principle he is—misanthropic and misotheos."

Egon Schiele, whose intense and raw portrayal of human emotion and beauty has deeply moved me, revealing the unfiltered essence of the human experience.

"I must see new things and investigate them. I want to taste dark water and see crackling trees and wild winds. I want to gaze with astonishment at moldy garden fences, I want to experience them all, to hear young birch plantations and trembling leaves, to see light and sun, enjoy wet, green-blue valleys in the evening, sense goldfish glinting, see white clouds building up in the sky, to speak to flowers. I want to look intently at grasses and pink people, old venerable churches, to know what little cathedrals say, to run without stopping along curving meadowy slopes across vast plains, kiss the earth and smell soft warm marshland flowers. And then I shall shape things so beautifully: fields of colour…"

Anaïs Nin, a force of nature and embodiment of feminine strength, whose deep exploration of inner life and boundless creativity has left an indelible impression on me. Her work continues to inspire and challenge me to embrace the fullness of my inner world:

"She was colour, brilliance, strangeness."

"I have the power to multiply myself. I am not one woman."

"Ordinary life does not interest me. I seek only the high moments. I am in accord with the surrealists, searching for the marvelous."

"I can only connect deeply, or not at all."

Carl Gustav Jung, one of the most brilliant psychiatrists, psychologists, psychotherapists, and empiricists in history. Jung's exploration of the collective unconscious and shadow self has offered me invaluable tools for self-awareness and personal development. His legacy continues to inspire and guide those seeking to understand the depths of the mind and the path to self-discovery.

"A man who has not passed through the inferno of his passions has never overcome them. As far as we can discern, the sole purpose of human existence is to kindle a light in the darkness of mere being. Everything that irritates us about others can lead us to an understanding of ourselves."

"People will do anything, no matter how absurd, in order to avoid facing their own souls. One does not become enlightened by imagining figures of light, but by making the darkness conscious."

"The privilege of a lifetime is to become who you truly are."

Fyodor Dostoyevsky, the maddening genius with profound understanding of human nature and morality:

"If you want to overcome the whole world, overcome yourself."

"People speak sometimes about the 'bestial' cruelty of man, but that is terribly unjust and offensive to beasts, no animal could ever be so cruel as a man, so artfully, so artistically cruel."

"People. People. Endless noise. And I am so tired. And I would like to sleep under trees; red ones, blue ones, swirling passionate ones."

"I exist. In thousands of agonies—I exist."

"If there is no God, everything is permitted."

Virginia Woolf, a literary giant whose deep introspection and exploration of the human condition have left an indelible mark:

"No need to hurry. No need to sparkle. No need to be anybody but oneself."

"What is the meaning of life? That was all—a simple question; one that tended to close in on one with years. The great revelation had never come. The great revelation perhaps never did come. Instead, there were little daily miracles, illuminations, matches struck unexpectedly in the dark; here was one."

"I want to raise up the magic world all around me and live strongly and quietly there."

"Reality? Reality has never been enough for me."

Mikhail Bulgakov, a masterful writer and playwright, another troubled soul who faced censorship and persecution in his lifetime, with immense talent and a deep soul, fascinated me with his imaginary worlds that blend reality with fantastical elements, feeling both familiar and boundlessly expansive:

"But would you kindly ponder this question: What would your good do if evil didn't exist, and what would the earth look like if all the shadows disappeared? After all, shadows are cast by things and people. Here is the shadow of my sword. But shadows also come from trees and living beings. Do you want to strip the earth of all trees and living things just because of your fantasy of enjoying naked light?"

"Kindness. The only possible method when dealing with a living creature. You'll get nowhere with an animal if you use terror, no matter what its level of development may be. That I have maintained, do maintain and always will maintain. People who think you can use terror are quite wrong. No, no, terror is useless, whatever its colour – white, red or even brown! Terror completely paralyses the nervous system."

"Everything passes away - suffering, pain, blood, hunger, pestilence. The sword will pass away too, but the stars will remain when the shadows of our presence and our deeds have vanished from the Earth. There is no man who does not know that. Why, then, will we not turn our eyes toward the stars? Why?"

"There are no evil people in the world, only unhappiness disguised as evil."

And then there is indispensable Franz Kafka. Although I have shifted away from his writing in recent years and no longer resonate with it as much, he was a dear friend and frequent company during my darkest, loneliest, and most challenging times. His work, full of raw honesty and insight, offered a kind of companionship that felt both intimate and enduring:

"The way he can risk everything and risks nothing, because there is nothing but truth in him already, a truth that even in the face of the contradictory impressions of the moment will justify itself as such when the crucial time arrives. The calm self-possession. The slow pace that neglects nothing. The immediate readiness, when it is needed, not sooner, for long in advance he sees everything that is coming."

"I, for the most part silent, had nothing to say; among such people the war doesn’t call forth in me the slightest opinion worth expressing."

"You do not need to leave your room. Remain sitting at your table and listen. Do not even listen, simply wait, be quiet, still and solitary. The world will freely offer itself to you to be unmasked, it has no choice, it will roll in ecstasy at your feet." Of course, there are many more authors who deserve to be on this list, but I chose these because they have touched my life in ways that are both unique and deeply personal. I hope that at least some of you will read to the end and find a bit of inspiration and insight in these quotes, just as they have given me. If you’ve made it this far, thank you. 🌹

[hellishfig]

just finished listening to episode 34 of worlds beyond number, "something to remember you by," which is the end of arc 3 of the wizard, the witch, and the wild one, and i feel sick from how incredible it was. the physical reactions my body made to some of the words and music in this podcast really took me by surprise. i'm still reeling.

some thoughts:

i'm so happy that suvi is questioning the citadel, her reaction to silver's letter was inspired, and i LOVED her interactions with the quartermaster. she's so clever and intimidating (holy shit that was HOT), but i'm worried about what's happening to silver. i have an inkling that the witches may have already started making moves alongside the man in black, and i wonder how that will affect suvi going forward. and going to try and save silver before returning their "precious cargo" to the citadel... i hope suvi can keep questioning, and that whatever she faces, she doesn't let the justification machine run its course any longer.

eursulon meeting up with tefmet was really cool. i enjoyed the return of the strongest man in silbury immensely. it was extremely funny. and then, when eursulon asked to help and succeeded on his persuasion checks, it was solemnly touching. i love eursulon's power being in steadfast support and protection, and how to him, it's not about opposing the citadel in its entirety, it's about saving spirits, great and small, from those who would use them. and that's something he can do while still protecting his true friends.

ame let the chaos OUT this episode, and it was delightful and nerve wracking and thrilling to listen to. she's very bossy and it's so funny to hear how immediately eursulon goes along with it, despite not knowing what "it" is. growing up watching grandma wren, she seems to have gained a natural authority that makes people who love her listen to her when she asks them to perform innocuous menial tasks. but that's also interesting, because her chaos is focused, if imprecise. she knows what she needs to do and will do it, damn the consequences. as long as she can get away, who cares what she leaves in her wake? that's a problem for future ame.

they stole some brass knockers and a lion! they kidnapped nif to save her from being killed by indri! tof burned bright to free a vrock! suvi heads to war, eursulon and ame TO TOMA! (i almost cried when eursulon said those words and the music swelled. what the fuck, lou. what the FUCK taylor and jared. i'm not okay!!!)

and then of course, brockvale. holly hill. the resting place of sir curran of the hawthorn, who unknowingly sent eursulon on a quest that would lead him to our story. the man in black, the pilgrim under stars, the king of knight, the stranger, holds sir curran's shield. he comes to make an offer. will this poor old guard bid a weary traveler to step over this threshold?

this is why worlds beyond number feels so different to me from other dnd shows and podcasts. these artists have come together with the shared goal of not just playing a fun game that they all enjoy, but with the express aim of crafting a brilliant story. i love a goofy campaign full of shenanigans as much as the next person, but i adore how every choice in this show is given weight and meaning. there are no decisions made for laughs. it doesn't feel like playing a game. it feels like living in the story.

and there are also moments like the ending of this episode. a snapshot of elsewhere in the world, something the players don't know, but the audience gets to. it fills out the edges of the story and provides a richer tapestry of lore and reasoning behind the machinations of those who oppose our heroes. it gives life to the tale.

my heart is beating so fast. this show is incredible. thank you, @worldsbeyondpod , for the world you're creating.

[wanderingxiao]

-My Goddess-

NSFW, 18+ only Plz~ 

SPOILERS FOR SUMERU’S ARCHON QUEST BEWARE

Summary: Scaramouche brings you to Sumeru to have you witness his birth as a god, but he didn't plan for your reaction...

Pairing: Fatui! Scaramouche x Female Reader

Warning: Spoilers for Akasha Pulses Archon quest, foul language, god complex Scara, unprotected sex, Scara is nice but mean, degradation, creampie, and little bit of angst and fluff.

Word Count: 5.6K (How tf did this get so long)

Enjoy~

“Look at them, (Y/N)! All those tiny insects… building my chamber where I shall rule over them.” The silver blade that was normally referred to as the balladeer’s tongue was ever so gentle and caring as he gazed upon the contexts of the scholar’s creation. His pale skin shined underneath all the lights, arms outstretched marveling at the glorious creation. The mechanized machine loomed over you both, your place next to the Balladeer forever being cast out by his own shadow. He was an incredibly selfish individual. His goals were never to bring you with him in his accession into godhood. A small pawn on his chess board to dispose of. “Isn’t it magnificent? Everyone, is preparing for my birth into this world, as a god!” His tongue dripped with venomous anticipation, poisoning you to praise him, worship him, and bow before his feet like the underling you now realized you were. “Are you going to stare gawking or are you going to congratulate me on finally achieving godhood after centuries of careful planning?”

“I’m sorry, My Lord. Forgive me for my lack of words.” Your response clearly did not do much for his souring mood upon not receiving your praise. He turned his body towards you, the jingle of the bells on his hat chiming at his slow steps towards you. Your composure remained unchanged in the presence of The Balladeer, his cold expression having no effect on your heart. “Are you not happy that I am finally fulfilling my purpose for being created? I have my heart, and I will use my newfound strength… to rule over the insects of this world that grovel beneath me.” He stopped in front of you, dark lavender eyes gazing directly into your eyes that were unfortunately cast downwards. You knew he was looking, but you didn’t dare meet his gaze, remaining silent instead. This only seemed to anger The Balladeer more. “What’s troubling you? Is there something you dislike about the design? I will have it changed if that is what you want.”

“…What I want, Lord Scaramouche?” The tremble in your voice was evident, there was no hiding anymore exactly how you felt in that moment. The upcoming god could easily pick up on your changed emotions, suddenly becoming stricken with anxiety. “I… I want you back.” It was plain and simple as that. Your first meeting with The Balladeer was nothing short of fate. It was a cold day In Snezhnaya, your village near the Fatui headquarters always patrolled and watched closely. Remembering how the cold snow felt on your bare feet would forever be ingrained in your brain from that day, along with finding The Balladeer practically frozen near a river. He was welcomed into your home for 3 days, secluded due to the raging blizzard that always took the lives of any who dared challenge its icy wind laced touch. “You’re… You’re changing. You’re starting to leave me behind. You… replaced me already.”

“Huh?” His cold tone only fueled the tears that threatened to spill from your eyes, still recalling his harsh yet gentle nature as he resided in your home. He voiced his displeasure almost every minute, but he made no effort to walk out and take his chances with the vengeful blizzard. You learned a lot about him during those 3 short days. How he enjoyed bitter tea and despised anything sweet you had to offer him for dessert. The immense sorrow that lingered in his empty chest as he gazed over the stuffed animal in the house. The way he would become engrossed in reading about blade forgery, almost as if he had known about the art for centuries. And lastly, how much the all-powerful Fatui Harbinger detested insects. “What nonsense are you going on about? When did I ever give you the impression, I was every going to let you escape?”

“Just look at what you’re doing, Lord Scaramouche… you’re… ascending far beyond my reach anymore. It’s not a matter of trying to escape from you… you’re just starting to abandon me.” His breath hitched once those words left your soft lips. Never in his life did he ever think you would be saying those words to him. It was anticipated to be the other way around, but the tables had turned now. “You… praise Ms. Haypasia more than you do me…” That wasn’t true. Not to him anyways. You and that other human were completely different. She was just a mere follower, disposable, you were supposed to be by his side forever. “Even the way you look at this thing-“ You turned your head to look up at the machine that hung above. “-as if it’s your everything now. Your time with me has shortened, and the attention you once gave me has dwindled into but a small insignificant grain of dust… The gnosis, this machine… it’s your heart… I wished for you to gaze at me like that… I wished for you to stay with me until the world takes me… I wanted to be your heart.”

“No… that’s- that’s absurd!” His voice wavered just slightly, hands reaching out to grasp your arms, holding you tightly in his grasps. “You… You-“ The words kept getting caught in his throat as he tried to voice his conflicting emotions. After a few seconds of pondering for the right words, the thought died within his throat, choosing to remain silent. “I wish you… all the best, Lord Scaramouche. I’ll never forget my time with you. You will be in my thoughts always… and I’ll worship you until the day I die… I love you.” His breath caught in his throat hearing those words pass from your lips so carelessly. Throwing that phase out to him as if you weren’t about to leave him alone. His body was stiff when you suddenly placed your hands onto his cheeks, the feeling of your warm hands stunning him further. Your face was so close to his, he could feel your nervous breaths, almost hear your heartbeat hammering away at your ribcage. Your lips were soft against his own, moving gently against him even though he showed no sign of returning your affections.

Once you were gone from his touch, the world came crashing.

“You can’t leave. I forbid it.” You only gave him a sad smile, moving your hands off his cheeks. The attempt was quickly stopped by the harbingers intense grip slamming down onto your wrists to stop you. “I didn’t give you permission to leave. You are not allowed to leave my side.” His head was lowered, making it impossible for you to gaze into his dark lavender eyes and gauge exactly what he was feeling at this moment. You had an idea of what it was just by the way his hands trembled while holding you. “Lord Scaramouche, I hope you know I’m not betraying you like the others.” The grip he had on you tightened, his shoulders now trembling, still unable to gauge his emotions. You knew of his history as a puppet, and as the almighty electro archons creation. “I’m letting you go to achieve your purpose you’ve longed for. I won’t keep you grounded any longer. You’ve been through so much; you deserve this opportunity- “

“Then come with me! Let us both ascend together into godhood! Become my goddess. Rule by my side and stay!” The hurt in his voice was now clearer than ever. He was deeply troubled by your decision. To think you would ever consider leaving him drove him mad. All because of your selfless intentions not to hold him back? How absurd! Ever since he began seeing you more and more, he knew he could never let you go. That first kiss sealed his fate with you years ago. “L-Lord Sc-“ He lunged his hand forward to grab your mouth tightly, suppressing any words from coming out as he spoke. “You will be my goddess, whether you like it or not. We will become equals. Do not address me in that way again, or I will have to punish you.” Nodding quickly, your shaky fingers attempted to pry his tight grip off your mouth, slightly taken aback by his sudden outburst. A dark chuckle echoed in your ears when his lips came close to your ear. “Good… now there’s something I must take in order to properly claim you as my goddess. Something… I’ve wanted to do with you for so long.”

Your heart skipped a beat as his lips moved in slow motion in front of you.

“Your body.”

The sounds of machines in the background suddenly become more and more fuzzy as his demand came crashing onto your mind like a dozen bricks. The thrashing of your heart against your ribcage became more violent the more you imagined becoming one with Scaramouche. The relationship between you remained pure and innocent for a long time. The only thing you had ever done with him was hug him or give him a kiss on the head here and there and on very rare occasions give him a real kiss. To excel to something as serious as that? It was all too much for you to handle. You loved him. As much as you didn’t want to in the beginning you couldn’t help but fall in love with the Fatui Harbinger. Through his harsh acts and mean words, all he had ever wanted was to be loved and wanted. His walls broke when you indulged in his buried human desires.

“Kissing won’t be enough for me anymore. Once I finish claiming you… you will permanently be mine, to rule by my side forever, never to part from me. Doesn’t that sound nice? Bound to your god through body and soul. Is that what you want? Will that make you happy?” His questions were making your head spin. He knew the answers to his own questions though, it was all a means to influence you further. You didn’t need to respond to tell him how much you longed to be by his side. “It was idiotic to think you could simply leave after all we’ve been through. Even if you wanted to without such a selfishly selfless reason such as that…” His voice trailed off, slowly letting go of your mouth and replacing his cold hand against your neck, squeezing lightly. “Listen close, I will not repeat this.” He called, leaning towards your ear. His breath was hot despite his body being frigid. You shifted in his grasp, swallowed thickly before he spoke. “I love you too.”

“S…Scaramouche?” Your voice was soft and almost like a faint whisper whisked about by the clattering noise around you. That was the first time he had ever admitted such feelings towards you. His cheeks were a soft pink, scowling at you and himself in disgust over his emotionally human confession. He didn’t give you another second to speak or breathe before he attached his lips to yours in a passionate kiss. In an instant, you melted into his touch, your shaky uncertain hands coming to rest against his cold cheeks, nimble fingers edging closer and closer to his indigo locks. His hair was incredibly soft, so perfect to run your fingers through and pull. His hands came to your waist, pulling your lower body against his. His tongue slipped, parting your lips to rub against your teeth, ordering you to open your mouth for him. You obeyed him, letting him completely consume you. “M-Mmm… Scara-Mph!”

One of his hands came to grab your hair, pulling your head back until he was holding you against him, leaning you back to appropriately dominate you. Your arms wrapped around his neck quickly, scared of falling but knew he would never let you go. His tongue darted inside your mouth, swirling around your mouth in needy passion. His teeth clanked against yours as he pushed himself deeper, his tongue reaching the deepest parts of your mouth. Precious oxygen was beginning to become necessary, but you didn’t want to pull away from his blissful and loving touches. A low groan echoed into your mouth being swallowed by your small gasp of air before he closed you off again with his lips. You could feel yourself beginning to get weak in your knees, slowly falling to the floor while Scaramouche kept you close to him. He parted from you finally, a string of saliva connecting your tongues until he licked it away and swiped his tongue over his lips.

“Already weak from one kiss? Hah, how pathetic you truly are. It’s a nuisance that you’re human, that’ll change in due time if you’re going to be my goddess.” You didn’t understand what he had meant by those words, but you did know that your remaining strength dropped once he gazed into your eyes with a powerful, dominating lust. God were his eyes just hypnotizing. His gaze followed to all the workers in the large area, irking him further as he realized he had been too distracted by you. “Hey! All you pests! Get out!” His voice was booming and loud, his tone laced with toxic authority that should not be dared challenged. The workers all looked confused and exchanged glances, further angering the ascending god. “Are you all deaf? I said, get the fuck out!” The workers scurried away in fear, leaving all their tools, and exiting the area. He turned back towards you, his lips curling into a sadistic smirk. “Come, my goddess.”

“Y…Yes, Scaramouche.” You shakily rose, clambering into his arms as he drug you up into the chamber of the machines head. It was sparkling red, its contents almost like you were floating into space. He swished his hand out, the machine face closing behind you, trapping you inside with the godly creation of an archon. As soon as those doors were closed, his lips were on yours again, this time more desperate and needy. His hands were trailing up and down your body, exploring his inexperienced hands over every curve and crevice that your body hid. A sigh left his lips into your mouth, groaning at the feeling of how soft and smooth your breasts were. “Tsk. Childe is always chattering about how pleasant these feel… damn idiot was right about one thing for once.”

His hands continued to knead and squeeze your breasts, getting rougher each second hearing your soft sighs of pleasure. “Yeah? You like that don’t you? So filthy.” His lips curled and arched into a grin, his perfect teeth showing just how amused he was at how much you were loving his touch. It gave him a confidence boost. Truth be told he’d never done anything like this either, only read about from human books or got lectured about it from Childe or La Signora. “Yes, Scaramouche… it… it feels good.” He gave a raspy laugh, narrowing his eyes as you tilted your head to the side, eyes closing as you could only focus solely on the way his hands kneaded you. He took this invitation and leaned forward, his hot breath fanning over your delicate skin before sinking his teeth into you. He pushed you back against one of the walls, one hand slamming against it while his other continued to squeeze and grope. “Mmm! Wait-! Ngh…”

“No one gave you permission to talk back to your god. So hush, and be a good girl for me. Even your fragile body can do so much as that can’t it?” His voice was low and husky, his tongue slowly moving over the indentions in your flesh made by his teeth. A shiver slipped through your spine at the cool feeling of his salvia colliding with the cool air, your back arching into his greedy hands. Both his hands came and started to tear at your shirt, the sound of fabric ripping echoing in your ears that made your heart rate increase. He fumbled with the clothing that didn’t come off right away and yanked it off you, tugging and pushing your body to and from him. Once your shirt was completely off, he started to wander his eyes up and down your body, his cheeks a soft pink as his virgin eyes soaked in every bit of your untouched, pure skin. “Wow… if I had known that your body was this beautiful, I would’ve taken you for myself a long time ago. Haha, not as if I would let you go to begin with.”

“S-Scara… s-stop staring please, it’s embarrassing…” Your head turned to the side, squeezing your eyes closed trying not to focus on his hard gaze over your half-naked form. A low growl rumbled through his chest, his hands grabbing ahold of your waist tightly and leaning forward to aggressively kiss and bite your neck. “There you go again, ordering me around. Must I put you in your place the hard way?” He took a firm step forward, trapping you completely against his chest and the wall. You could only pant in response, whimpering in embarrassment as you urged your hands not to cover yourself. His head craned down, his eyes now intently staring at the gorgeous sight of your cleavage, fleshly mounds almost falling out of your bra from how they were pushed against his chest. “Let’s take this off and see the real thing, shall we?”

“O-Okay…” You pushed forward a bit, leaning into Scaramouche while his cool fingers traced up your back to find the clasps of your bra. His nimble fingers fumbled slightly, cursing under his breath trying to get the damn thing unclasped. Once he finally got the clasp undone, he pulled the back forwards, the straps adorning your shoulders becoming loose. “Shaking already? I’ve barely touched you yet.” You hadn’t even realized you were shaking until he made it known to your flushed ears. You were incredibly nervous. “There’s no need to worry so much, my dear goddess.” His hands wandered up your arms, lightly grasping the straps before pulling them down and letting your bra drop to the floor. Your hands twitched harshly upon feeling bare in front of him, the urge to cover up becoming increasingly more prominent. “Your god will take real good care of you. I’ll make sure you feel the best you ever have in your entire pathetic mortal life.”

“Y…Yes, sir.” You opened your eyes slowly, cheeks instantly flushing realizing he was staring intently at you. The deep pits of his irises lulled you in to fall deeper into the endless hole of desire and love. His eyes lowered to your bare chest, his own smooth cheeks becoming pink in surprise and embarrassment. He was starstruck. The beautiful curves and swells of your breasts were mesmerizing to him, and let’s not skip over the fact your nipples were cute and erected for him. He tested the waters of this new experience, pinching your nipple between his index and thumb, awaiting your response. A whimper fell upon his mechanical ears, his body urging him to do more for you. His fingers rolled the erect bud, causing your body to arch into his touch, a quiet moan resonating from your swollen lips. He groaned lowly at the noise. “Fuck… that’s hot. Give me more. Submit yourself to me, completely.”

His lustful actions continued, rolling and pinching your nipples while his eyes stared Intensely at your expressions, watching each and every twitch and wince of pleasure. He quickly found himself now addicted to making you feel good. Your sweet noises caused by his hands was such a turn on for him. Once he was done with your chest, he moved down to your hips, rubbing your hips soothingly before hooking his slender fingers around your panties and pants and pulled them down swiftly. A harsh shake shuddered through your body feeling more exposed before him. Of course, you’d never done anything like this before. It was all so embarrassing. For Scaramouche, it was all new and exciting. Seeing your voluptuous body on display for him, completely bare and vulnerable for him to pray on.

“You look so humiliating standing here, shaking before me. It looks as if your legs are about to give up on you.” He mused, lips curling into a sly and cocky smile watching you quiver beneath him. His dark lavender eyes trailed up and down your body, quietly admiring all your natural beauty. He couldn’t help but stare down at your nether regions, accented by tufts of swift curls. His hand came slowly, his slender fingers running over your upper thigh slowly. Your back arched in his cool touch, lip catching between your teeth trying not to cover up or run away from him. The thin digits of his hand slid across your thigh to run his finger down the middle of your folds, feeling the lewd slick that had started to gather and threaten to drip onto the floor. “It’s all wet and slippery down here. How lewd of you. Maybe I was wrong about you, maybe you are a dirty girl after all, hmm?”

“N-No… It’s… it’s because of you.” His eyes glimmered with lust hearing your confession, body involuntarily shuddering. He could feel a faint pulse in his shorts. It was at that moment he secretly thanked his creator for at least one damn thing. A dick to give you a nice, good fucking with (she really just wanted him to look as real as possible). The puppet grinned watching your shy eyes shift to meet his in a long and loving gaze, tainted with hints of lust. He leaned forward slowly not to startle you and captured your lips in an oddly soft and passionate kiss. Your body instinctively relaxed upon feeling his embrace, allowing him to slip his fingers up and inside. Your back arched into him, suddenly becoming tense and breaking the passionate kiss your lover initiated. “Ngh… f-feels weird, Scara…”

“Y-Yeah, it’s fucking tight.” His once confident voice was wavering as his finger was clenched tight by your hot gummy walls. The puppet experimented with his finger as he moved it around, feeling your cunt’s curvy walls and tight squeeze. “S-Scaramouche… Hmm.” He watched your expression closely before he added a second finger. You gave a pitiful cry of discomfort upon his second finger being added. His body shuddered, hips bucking forwards desperate to feel something, it was beginning to get painful. He used his non occupied hand and shyly placed your hand against the bulge poking out from under the metal plate that guarded his hips. The ascending god shuddered in ecstasy upon the light contact, a low growl emanating from his chest. “Touch me.” It wasn’t a request; it was an order.

“Mmm, Scara, I-it’s so… so hard.” A quiet mewl left your lips when your hand hesitantly started to rub and squeeze against the tip of his cock. Scaramouche moaned lowly against your face, a flurry of curses leaving his lips once you got more confident with him. If you were to get confident with him why not he do the same? He started thrusting his fingers into your core, his slender digits reaching deeper and deeper with every movement. You both were moaning into each other’s face, your hot breaths adding fuel to the already out of control fire of desire. “Fuck I need this. I need you.” Your lover pulled his fingers out, admiring the lewd fluid on his digits. You gasped once his fingers left, your cunt squeezing at nothing, disappointed at the loss of his fingers. A harsh clank echoed in the red sparkling space around you as Scaramouche removed the metal plate adorning his hips. “Strip me. Use your pretty shaking fingers and take off everything.”

His word was law. You began running your fingers over his chest, carefully removing the electro symbol that usually gleamed in the light against his chest. You stripped him carefully until all that was left was his shorts. The bulge was clearly now present, showing you just how big it was. His skin was so smooth without blemish or scar or scrape. His complexion was utterly perfect. He was crafted for godly hood after all. “Well? Go on. Take ‘em off. I did tell you everything didn’t I? Or is your head to far in the clouds to even comprehend your god’s order?” You shook your head before you carefully slid down the shorts that adorning Scaramouche’s thin hips. The harsh thumping of your heart echoed within your ears meeting his erect member, standing tall and proud. Your eyes shifted up to him, blushing more seeing how red his face was too. “Scara-“

“Shut up and turn around.” He roughly turned you around and grabbed your hips, pulling your ass back against his hard erection. A surprised gasp flew from your mouth feeling the touch of his length against you. His hands wandered up your back to carefully grab your hair, pulling your head back to place kisses against your shoulder and neck. “Are you ready for the main event? To become my goddess and rule by my side? Tell me.” He pulled a little harder, his voice attempting to sound dominant and hungry but only coming out as desperate and a bit nervous. A faint affirmation left your tongue, leaving the godly puppet to hastily locate your entrance with the tip of his engorged cock. “Good girl.” The tenderness of his lip caught between his teeth once he found it, slowly pushing it in before looking up to watch your reactions.

A wince escaped onto your expression, the stretch of his length in your inexperienced hole becoming overwhelming. His eyes continued to watch you closely, his grip on your hair loosening when he dropped his hand down to your hip. He could see the way your jaw clenched, the way your eyes scrunched, and it sent a flurry of panicked thoughts through his mind. He never intended to hurt you. He had heard this was supposed to be a pleasurable act, something that would deepen your relationship and make it nearly impossible for you to leave. Even though the puppet had lived through centuries, he was still a bit naive. His hips halted, hands lightly caressing you in fear that you might pull away from him.

“Hey… If you’re in pain say so. Don’t be a stubborn brat.” You shook your head and turned to gaze lovingly into his eyes with a smile. His face bloomed in a light shade of red. “P-Please continue, Scaramouche. I want you too.” He gave you a glare, tender lips turning into a deep frown out of embarrassment of your actions. He leaned forward to kiss you again, his body urging him to seal his lustful acts with a loving kiss to solidify your bond to him. He pushed his hips up until his groin was flush against the plushness of your butt. A whine of pain came to his ears, only pushing him to please you more with his lips. The tight squeeze of your velvety walls had his mind clouded in ecstasy. The temptation to begin bucking his hips into you at a ruthless pace becoming all the more irresistible. “Scara-“

“I know. Shut up and keep kissing me.” Your lips came back to his, your mouth open to allow his tongue to mark and claim you once more. You could feel him slowly pulling his length out, making you feel empty inside before he suddenly thrust his hips back inside. A quiet cry of pain fused with pleasure echoed from your throat, your lover grunting in response to the tight squeeze around his length. Your fragile mind couldn’t choose what it wanted to focus on. The way Scaramouche’s tongue easily pulls you into him or the possessive way he begins to buck his hips to push his cock to the deepest parts of your pussy. It was all so overwhelming you couldn’t help but mindlessly moan and sigh at each thrust of his hips and flick of his tongue.

“That’s it, hah, good girl.” The praise of your god sent goosebumps down your spine, the urge to gaze into eyes while he claims you urging you to attempt to turn around. He stops you quickly and pushes your shoulder harshly to keep your face away from seeing him. “Stop moving and -ngh- just enjoy what I’m giving you, hah.” Truth was he didn’t want you to see what kind of expression he was making. His brows were furrowed, cheeks a lovely shade of pink with heavy pants coming from his swollen lips. He himself was beginning to get lost in the tender squeeze of your cunt around his cock. He had never experienced something that felt so good, he would definitely find himself getting addicted to this feeling. “P-Please -mm!- wanna see you, Scara.”

“Tsk! Fine, if it’ll stop your whining.” Before you knew it, an empty feeling engulfed you before you were spun around and shoved up against the wall by your lover. He lips met yours harshly before he sheathed himself back inside, almost knocking the air out of you at the sudden action. He ruthlessly thrust his hips against yours, lewd noises coming from below you as your sexes collided again and again. A musky smell enveloped the small space of the crimson galaxy that surrounded. The sound of your sweet moans filled the former Fatui Harbinger’s ears, spurring him to become rougher and more possessive in his actions of love making. The feeling of the mushy head of his cock kissing the entrance of your cervix sent you spiraling into the depths of lust.

“Feels good, Scara, ahhh, feels so good.” Your lover’s indigo hair brushed over your forehead as he pressed against you, his deep lavender eyes burning holes into your soul from his heated, obsessive gaze. Scaramouche sighed in bliss against your face, his indigos brows furrowing while he continued to quicken his pace. “Fuck, it feels fucking ama- ngh!- amazing! You like it don’t you? Shit… like when your god makes you good like this? Yeah? Huh? Hah, hah, answer me!” Lust dripped off every word of his sharp tongue. You could only cry a feeble ‘yes’ with a meek call of his name. The lewdly wet sounds of his hips snapping against yours increased, your walls becoming tighter around his pulsing cock. “S-Scara! Hmm! Wait! Something- Somethings coming! P-Pull out!”

“Come undone for me. Ngh, yes, yes- damnit!” His thrusts began to become sloppy and mismanaged, hot and heavy pants coming out of your sexy lover. Your hands raked down his back, clawing at his skin for something to cling onto while a tight feeling began to build in your lower abdomen. Scaramouche’s hands pressed your hips against the wall, ramming his cock as deep as he could, holding you in place. His face buried into your neck, moaning uncontrollably as he neared his sweet release. “Scara, Scaramouche, p-please! Hmm!! Can’t hold it! It’s co- Ahh!” Your warning for him was cut off by a loud moan as you felt the previous buildup of pleasure snap in your abdomen. Scaramouche felt your walls tighten around him and your climax splattering onto his groin.

“Fuck!” His head fell to your chest, letting out a loud moan before giving one firm and harsh thrust inside before he could feel his length twitching, releasing all his sticky seed inside you, overflowing to the point it started to come out of your connected sexes. You both were panting heavily, holding each other tightly as you attempted to calm down from the immense emotions and feelings you both had undergone. A wave of drowsiness washed over your form, your legs numb and heavy, eyelids becoming droopy. “S-…Scara?” The god lifted his head to gaze at your tired expression. A quiet huff slipped through his nostrils as he carefully pulled out of you, a mixture of your sinful fluids splattering to the floor. You let out a soft whine at the empty yet full feeling down there. Scaramouche held you tight, supporting you and your weak state to sit against the floor, pulling some of your clothes over to cover you up. “Tsk… look how weak you’ve become after just one round. We’ll have to change that.”

“You’ve… done this before?” The pure look of disgust on his face let you know that that was not the case. He gave you a soft glare, flicking your head at your stupid accusation. “Are you stupid? No. Reading and having to babysit Childe and listen to his bratty bantering taught me more than I cared to know… but I guess it came useful after all.” You gave a sleepy smile and a small laugh, laying your head into his chest. You felt safe in his arms. Out of all the horrible things Scaramouche has done, you knew deep down that he would never even imagine hurting you. He would always protect you. “Sorry… and I’m sorry about the things I said… I just… want what is best for you, Scaramouche. You truly do deserve the best.” There was a comfortable silence that followed your apology, your lover contemplating how he should respond.

“…you really are stupid, you know that?” He gave a frustrated and annoyed sigh and pulled you closer to his thin frame, embracing you with a flustered blush on his cheeks. A soft hum came from your place on his chest, your body slowly succumbing to your drowsiness, but not before you proclaimed your love one last time. “Thank you… Scara. I love… you…” Once Scaramouche could hear your soft breathing and faint snoring, he gave a quiet sigh and lifted his gaze up to the crimson galaxy of the mechanical mask you both were confined in. He felt like his chest was about to burst open, body on fire, lips twitching uncontrollably as he held back a gentle smile, something he wished to show you. One day… when the entire world is at his feet, and the people of Teyvat worshipped only him, he would show you that gentle side of himself. When he knew it was safe.

“I… love you too, stupid idiot.”

“Are you deaf, or just stupid?”

-Scaramouche

[silviakundera]

Dramas I watched in 2023

[Chinese Dramas]

My Journey to You - Wuxia. Spy games, badass ladies, subtextually homoerotic cousins. Gentle & sweet ML who melts the cold & calculated heart of FL assassin. Gorgeous setting and cinematography. Left me with a burning desire to see Zhang Ling He play more gentle babygirl MLs and Esther Yu to play more anti-heroes. Absolutely perfect to me.., if we just pretend the director didn't add a pointless cliffhanger in the last 5 min. Which is how I choose to live my life.

Story of Kunning Palace - 'rebirth' costume drama that I waited to air for like 2 years or something and then it... actually didn't disappoint? And was almost everything I wanted? 😳😲 This is THE couple for that post about the pair that need to be stuck in a neverending monogamous relationship with each other as a quarantine measure to protect everyone else.

A Journey to Love - wuxia perfection. The stand-out drama that I wasn't expecting. Murder mommy & murder daddy became an otp for the ages and all of the supporting characters were interesting and dynamic. I cared about so many more characters than I expected and never fast fowarded. Just immensely satisfying.

The Ingenious One - wuxia with a weak, scheming scholar protagonist on a revenge quest (yes, we've all heard that before!) who puts together a group to execute his cons, Leverage style. I love me a martial artist x weak scholar couple 👌. Some exciting twists & turns in this one. Both A Journey to Love and The Ingenious One are best enjoyed coming in with little to no information. Hell, skip the trailers and simply dive in!

Hidden Love - Modern drama. Top tier romance-novel-on-screen writing and acting. It felt honest and real. The coming of age arc for the FL was well done. Great brother & sister relationship that feels authentic. The ML's backstory was so heart breaking because it was never overplayed for melodramatics. Just a quiet pain, a distance and a burden he carried with him.

Road Home - Modern. "Do you remember who I am?" / "Yes. If I were to turn to ashes, I would still remember you." I am very weak for the "reunited exes", "second time around" trope when the actors are capable and the breakup wasn't a narratively convenient 'misunderstanding'. As a career woman who works very long hours, I also tend to appreciate modern drama relationships where the couple manages to stay functional & supportive while not having a lot of free time for each other. That's my version of wish fulfillment 😂. I felt like this narrative made me fully understand why they couldn't make a long distance relationship work as young adults but now they're ready and have experienced enough of the world to know that they are happier with their lives joined together than apart.

Love You Seven Times - xanxia. I wrote a whole review post (love letter) on this one, since it seems rather underrated. I feel like this one may actually end up one of my fav examples of the genre. I just sincerely bought into the couple and their mutual devotion.

The Last Immortal - xanxia. Terrible trailer but turns out to be a decent show. I'm a fan of the genre, so I'm enjoying it. (I think you do need to be, to enjoy it - it doesn't transcend or really subvert..just a solid representation of xanxia) I like both lead actors and they do a good job with the material. It's working better for me than Ancient Love Poetry and Ashes of Love. After being eager for Song of the Moon in 2022 but then being let down (I dropped that one quick), I'm very happy 2023 brought me 2 xanxia I liked.

Three Body - modern sci-fi. Book 1 of my fav sci-fi trilogy of recent years. As a novel fan first, I was pleased to see it on screen with talented actors. Eager for book 2.

Love Me, Love My Voice - modern drama with an unusual couple (2 introverts) and dubbing fandom hyper fixation. A laid back relaxation drama, to de-stress with. Minimal plot, no conflict. Just sweet slow burn relationship building, singing & audio performances. Supportive friendships.

Here We Meet Again - modern drama that suffered from sloppy editing. I mean almost incoherent editing in a couple places, like when they are counting down the days until getting married and then.. It's not mentioned again? 🙃 But I very much enjoyed the couple's chemistry. I can't say it was objectively good but it sure was compulsively watchable for some reason.

Royal Rumors - Costume drama that was so aggressively mediocre that I don't have any real explanation for not dropping it. Except I find the lead actress unspeakably alluring. Blame my hormones.

Dropped

Back to the Brink - xanxia. Great concepts but the execution didn't work for me. I'm not a fan of slapstick and wacky humor within serious subject matter. (It's the reason kdramas can be very hit or miss with me.) The amount of humor layered into AJourney to Love is basically my limit for tragicomedies. (Note: I did go read the book and it was very entertaining - the tone was much more to my taste.)

My Lethal Man - modern. Embarassing english name, but they had me in the first half, not gonna lie. Then after her identity was exposed, I wasn't feeling it idk. Sometimes it's just not that complicated.

Destined/Chang Feng Du - costume drama. idk really why I dropped. I watched about a 3rd of it and then was distracted by other shiny objects. I plan to come back to this one in 2024 and finish.

Romance of the Twin Flower - costume drama; unholy abomination of a great novel. I hope somehow, someday, the culprits pay for their crime. Need I say more?

[Korean Dramas]

Perfect Revenge Marriage - a modern rebirth tale. For the 90% of it, I was high on the love of a drama that is just what you didn't know you wanted. The camp, the dedication, the scenery chewing, the glorious evil step mother. It was magical. And then the last 2 episodes I found underwhelming. I can't really explain it, the climax just didn't hit for me. But that's very much a personal taste issue and I'd definitely recommend to all drama lovers who enjoy the genre. Seriously, the performance of evil step mommy was a master class.

King the Land - modern workplace romance. I've heard complaints that there wasn't much of plot. But tbh that was fine with me, because some dramas are simply character pieces. This was all about the personal growth of the FL and ML. I ended up invested and rooting for the ML to become a decent guy who isn't a gross classist like his dad.

Destined with You - modern reincarnation drama. I blame my lingering kdrama good feelings about King the Land for convincing me to keep powering thru this one. Such a strong start but then half-way in I began to realize it simply wasn't going to go into the direction I wanted it to. I still have no idea what they intended to communicate with that love potion subplot.

Vincenzo - modern crime drama. I was late to the party on this one. But after I got around to watching the delightful Kinnporsche, this was rec'd to me as another drama that embraced the bigger than life unreality of Fantasy Mafia™ and provides a rollicking good time. Absolutely ridiculous and compulsively watchable. 10/10.

[American]

House of the Dragon - Awful people doing awful things to each other, as a 1st act before everything goes straight to hell. Plus freaky dragon-riding fantasy incest. What's there not to like?

Fall of the House of Usher (YES i DO watch every horror drama by Mike Flanagan thx) - Was it as good as the first 3..? No. Did I still breathlessly binge it in 2 days? Yes. Awful things happening to awful people, poetically. 👌 👌

[dayonah]

Now that I've made it far enough in the game to have solid opinions, my takes on Veilguard are as follows

I AM ENJOYING MYSELF IMMENSELY

Can definitely tell this was rushed, there's a lot of lopsidedness in the design where some aspects (level design) clearly had more time put into them than others (minor NPCs)

Feels inspired by DA2? Not in tone (way less snark/tragedy) but in other ways...

I hate the camera. So much. Please let me change it in settings to automatically follow me or sm

You can pet cats, dogs, and griffins (finally) and this is good

You cannot be an asshole. You can rarely disagree or say morally bad/dubious things. I think this is a symptom of the writers not being given enough time. I rarely play asshole characters but the options being there make it more intentional to be kind and I like that. I also just like having options. I want to roleplay,,,

Most of the dialogue options are different ways of saying the same thing, and even then they don't feel very different at all

Other things about [nice] being the default -- all your companions generally get along and rarely have tough conversations or disagree or struggle with differing viewpoints. I'm not saying I want them to hate each other. I just would like more nuance

All the villains so far are unambiguously evil and there is no reasoning with them, which I find incredibly boring. The whole game so far has a very black and white morality.

No one ever hates you, and if they express frustration at you they quickly apologize or someone else does. Please give me more consequences

I really like the level design, and the exploration areas are lovely

I'm glad they're doing something with dwarven lore

I like the companions, and the character design

The combat system seems to be that your companions auto-attack and don't ever die, and they won't use skills on their own? They have different elemental damage but otherwise, all have pretty similar skills. Companion classes fiction similarly. Almost everyone can heal, everyone can apply, everyone can detonate, etc. You can use companions' special skills even if they aren't there. It feels the same no matter who I have in my party

Combat depends a lot on positioning and dodging which is very painful when the game is so laggy

Someone pls optimize this game

I like the factions and the mechanics of them! I wish they had more narrative depth but I am enjoying sidequesting for them

I heavily dislike the narration after quests, which tells you immediately what the consequences will be later. I think the game would be much better if they had no narration besides the intro and did not give the quest end summaries it does

The game does a lot of just flat out telling you things, little to no intrigue or mystery, everyone has all the information, everyone agrees on the issue, no putting dots together

I like the background! Although of course Origins is my white whale, I don't think they're ever going to give actually different playable backgrounds again and this is pretty nice as far as substitutes go. I feel like my character is very meshed into the world

Rook definitely has a personality and feels less dry than Inquisitor

Dialogue often feels fanfiction-y, like everyone's already been to therapy and knows the correct responses to things

I like the upgrade system

Coming and going all over northern Thedas without needing roads also means we don't need to interact with local authority much, and it's hard to get a feel for the areas being different lore-wise besides the aesthetics of an area

Ultimately I think this game is comfy, satisfies my DA cravings, and I hope they patch some of the lag please I'm begging someone,,

[crystallizedday]

Quest – Rekindled (Part 3 of 5)

Level 32 – Hard

Before the demon was the broad-bladed sword given to him by one of those putrid brats. As much as he despised those soldiers, he was at least eager to analyze their findings, especially the strange weapons they kept finding.

Demongo knew something was special about them as soon as he laid his eyes on one of them. They all had this strong fiery aura to them that no one else could see. He knew this aura well.

Of course, he would not tell anyone his discoveries yet. He wanted to figure out why this was happening and how it could be used against these heinous monsters. He also admittedly enjoyed teasing these soldiers and that infuriating samurai. No. He was not going to tell them anything until their frustration with him stopped being amusing.

Still, these weapons perplexed him. They manifested from the disgusting beasts that infected these lands. Their fusion matter must have been tampered with by the spirits encased within these weapons, but why? Where did these spirits come from?

Perhaps the answers resided somewhere. He had heard certain rumors about the Hani Baba temple stationed in the Ruins. Perhaps that temple could give him some insight as to what could be going on.

He would have to look into it later

Because he could tell he had another issue to address right now.

He looked up from where he was seated, immediately recognizing the face that he was greeted with.

Demongo hissed. “Hello, Damien.”

“Heeeyyy!!” Damien gave the demon a small wave, smiling. “I saw you hiding out here while on my way to the crest.”

Demongo had tried to conceal himself within the small patch of forestry just outside the entrance to Huntor’s Crest. He should have figured it was not the most clever of spots to retreat to.

He sighed. “What do you want?”

Damien sat down in front of Demongo. “I wanted to make sure you were okay. Our last conversation seemed like it did kind of a number on you and-”

Demongo raised a hand to shut Damien up. “Look. I will admit I have some things I need to work through, but none of them should be of your concern. Just because I am forced to work with you humans does not mean any of you have the obligation or even the right to try and sway me over. I am not some troubled delinquent lashing out because of my issues. It is simply my nature to be this way. Once this war is over and my powers return, I will not be nearly as patient with you pests.”

Damien simply shrugged. “Okay.”

“Wh-”

Demongo was baffled by that response. “Is that all you have to say?!”

Damien nodded. “Yeah. That doesn’t really change why I wanna hang out with you.”

The demon fumbled over his words, both frustrated and immensely confused. “Are you stupid? Crazy?! You know what I’ve done, right?!”

“Yeah,” the human responded. “I know a decent bit about you. You go after warriors because you want to feel more powerful with their souls in your possession. Last I checked, you’re not exactly the conquering type. You just want to feel stronger. That’s why you’re so upset about losing your powers.”

“That’s…”

Demongo was dumbfounded. Damien was technically not wrong. No. He was absolutely right. The only power the demon sought was over those he considered strong enough to fulfill his commands. He did not exactly desire to rule the world or even the universe like many other villains did. Why would he? He would much rather be a powerful force feared and respected by all. It was why he was so content when he used to take orders from…

He did not want to think about that.

Demongo shifted his focus back to the conversation at hand. “How do you know that?”

Damien snickered. “It’s like you said. I can make good inferences. Just because I got a hefty amount of brawns in me doesn’t mean I don’t have any brains as well.”

He made a good point, but that did not make Demongo feel any better.

He set the sword aside. “Okay. Back to the topic at hand. Why are you here? Why are you talking to me? Why am I worth your time?”

Damien’s expression softened. “You’re just nice to be around, honestly. I can’t help but feel sort of gravitated towards you, regardless of your alliance. Honestly, if anyone else gave you the chance, I’m sure they would say the same thing.”

Demongo dismissed that notion. “Oh, please! All the others want nothing to do with me. All they want are answers only I can provide. Nothing more.”

“Hmph,” Damien huffed. “Guess I’m just weird then.”

“Yeah, you are,” the demon retorted. “You’re extremely weird. Instead of focusing on the invasion like you should, you’re wasting your time bothering me for no good reason! You keep talking to me like I’m-”

“A person?”

Damien interrupted him. “I’m guessing not a lot of people talk to you like that, huh?”

Demongo was nearly fed up with this human’s shenanigans. “Why would they?! Why would they ever talk to me like that knowing who I am?!”

Damien was unmoving, his soft tone contrasting greatly with the demon’s. “Because I think you deserve it.”

Demongo froze.

He could barely process what he was just told, let alone come up with a response to it. What would he even say to that? Should he agree? Disagree? He was not sure, and that was clearly getting to him.

Damien continued. “When I told you about wanting to see you flourish, I meant it. I wanna see other people look at you and recognize all the things you can do. Even without your powers, I’ve seen you do a lot of incredible things.”

Demongo tensed up, still silent.

The human could tell something was bothering him. “I know it may be hard to believe, but I genuinely want to help you. I want to help other people see you the way I see you. I want to-”

Demongo snapped at him.

“You think it’s that easy for me to understand?! That someone cares about me enough to go through all this effort?! Everyone else either tolerates me or wants me gone!! And you know what?! I was fine with that!! I was fine being alone!! I no longer had anyone to please, anyone to disappoint, anyone who could so easily toss aside my entire life for one slip-up that WASN’T EVEN MY FAULT!!”

The demon pointed to Damien, getting in his face once again. “You have got some nerve thinking you can just walk over and put this weight on me and act like that’s a good thing!! I just want to wait out this STUPID war so I can get the powers that were WRONGFULLY stolen from me!! And you know the worst part about that?”

Damien stayed silent, allowing Demongo to continue.

“I don’t even know if I can get my powers back!! I have no idea if it’s actually as simple as killing my counterpart!! And knowing that accursed samurai and his mindless allies, they’re probably planning to keep me powerless at all costs!! For all I know, I could have to live the rest of my life in CONSTANT fear that SOMETHING or SOMEONE will finally end me!! Do you know what that’s like?! Knowing that anyone or anything could end you at any moment if you’re not proven useful enough?!”

“Is that what you wanted to hear?! Did you want to hear me admit that I’m afraid?! Cause I AM!! I’m petrified!! I don’t know what I’m gonna do if I can’t get my powers back!! I don’t know if I can… I can…”

He stopped.

He felt hot streaks flowing down his cheeks. He tried wiping them off with the back of his hand. He stared at what he just wiped off.

This oozy substance glowed a bright blue, steam emitting from its hot surface. It was almost like lava.

Were these supposed to be

Tears?

“No no no no no no no, stop it!!”

He tried wiping off as much as he could to no avail. Any drops of it that hit the ground burned tiny holes into the dirt.

Why did that stupid human have to push him to his limits like this?!

Demongo looked up at Damien, barely able to make out the human’s widened eyes staring down at him.

The demon struggled to speak, words constantly catching in his throat as he gasped in between sobs. He glared at Damien. “Is th-this what you w-wanted? T-to see me like th-th-this?”

Damien tried to calm Demongo. “Hey, hey. Listen. It’s gonna be okay. Just breathe.”

Demongo tried to retaliate. “Wh-why should I listen t-to…”

“Please,” Damien insisted. “Bear with me just for a second, okay? Take deep breaths. Don’t worry about anything else. Just focus on your breathing.”

As much as the demon did not want to listen, he did not exactly have any other choice. He slowed his breathing, clutching the sides of his arms as he tried to ground himself.

Damien’s demeanor remained calm and gentle. “That’s it. You’re okay.”

Demongo looked back up at Damien, still not pleased with him. “Easy for you to say…”

“I know,” Damien admitted. “I know. I shouldn’t have pushed you that hard. I’m sorry I did that. Even so, I’m glad to told me all of that. I didn’t know you spent all that time being that scared.”

Demongo was silent, still glaring at the human while “tears” continued to pour down his face.

Damien looked off into nothing for a moment before returning his gaze to the demon. “You know, if you’re afraid of something happening to you, I can be here to help you feel safer! I know you probably don’t like me too much right now, but I really do want to do my best to help you. I’m not sure why, but I care about you, and that’s enough of a reason for me to do this.”

Demongo sniffed, shaking his head. “You really are weird… but…” He took in a shaky breath. “I already told you things I would not dare even utter to anyone else, so…”

Damien reached out, placing a careful hand on the demon’s shoulder.

Demongo yelped, Damien quickly retreating the hand.

The human was panicked. “Oh jeez! I’m sorry! I probably should’ve asked first-”

“NO!!” The demon shouted, his voice quieting back down after that. “Put it back… Please…”

Damien hesitated, but he eventually rested his hand back on Demongo’s shoulder.

The demon let out a shaky sigh. The feeling was so foreign yet so comforting, and he did not know why. His breathing eased as he wiped away the rest of his “tears” with the back of his wrist.

After a moment, he started chuckling to himself, his voice now raspy. “I’m actually impressed.”

“Oh?” That got Damien curious. “How so?”

Demongo smirked. “I didn’t think anyone was capable of making me break down like that, or even… open up, I suppose.”

“I’m glad I did,” Damien remarked. “Well, not the part where you broke down, but more so the part where you got to talk about things you’ve probably been bottling up for who knows how long. That’s not good for you, you know.”

The demon snickered. “Don’t you lecture me about such nonsense, human.”

Damien gave Demongo a mischievous grin in turn, bursting out into a laugh right after. He could not keep up the cheeky attitude.

He sighed. “I hope you know that I meant what I said. I’m attached to you, and I’m willing to be here as often as I can to help you feel safe. You’ve seen me fight those monsters. I’m sure you know I can definitely break a few noses if I need to.”

Demongo giggled hearing that, sighing. “Out of all the world’s greatest mysteries I have seen with my own eyes, you are by far the most baffling to me.”

“Oh really?” Damien placed his free palm under his chin. “What other mysteries have you seen?”

That got another good laugh out of the demon. He rested one of his own hands on top of the fleshy one resting on his shoulder. “Alright then…”

[d0d0-b0i]

oooough, i am absolutely in love with horizon series and rarely see anyone bring up these games, so i am immensely happy to see that you are enjoying them! (:>

regarding kotallo ship situation, I don't really get it either, but, from what i've seen, people just like to slap a romantic interest on aloy ( avad, erend, tallanah, etc ), which i find a little silly, but it's done in good faith ( i hope ). he is an interesting character, and his personal arc is sweet and compelling, maybe this is what draws people in

i'm really curious to hear your opinion on sylens, considering you did complete the frozen wilds dlc and didn't get far enough in the forbidden west story line to get the full picture

and! and! i'm really curious to hear about your favourite side-quests from both games, because community sleeps on those

okok, i'm rambling, sorry to barge in your asks so suddenly. i hope you'll enjoy your playthough, have a nice one! (:>

1) yeah honestly im surprised these games are so slept on?? the story is genuinely good, the main character is reasonably flawed and you want her to get better despite her best attempts to ignore her issues, plus the world is just so fun! insane honestly

2) i see! it just surprised me that he has somehow domineered the ao3 relationship count 😂🧐 would think that they were official or something but i haven’t gotten that far if they are

i understand why people like him though! hot himbo with a soft streak is always a good character choice

3) i think sylens is a good character! although he is a bit of a thorn in aloys side he ultimately is an antihero in that him helping her is only when the world would end if he didn’t. antisocial icon. also hot 👍

4) god the sidequest question is very hard haha! honestly i’ve been burning through the games so quickly they’re hard to keep track of, but i liked petra’s quests in both games, liked the dungeon delver guy from frozen wilds dlc! currently stuck on talanahs quest because the next point is like the end of the map that i haven’t even entered but im curious about it!

i honestly can’t pinpoint more than that atm but honestly? i can’t think of a single quest or errand that i found tedious or boring, which is extremely rare! the side quests are always something i enjoy doing, but since there’s so many they’re kind of melting together in my head lol!

-have a good one as well! as soon as i come home i think i might do some fanart because honestly it’s a crime that the fandom isn’t bigger and id like to put some art out there :)

[brown-little-robin]

5, 6, 17, and 25. :)

5. What was the last thing you watched?

...huh! strangely, it was not jojo! it was in fact the next-to-last episode of Over the Garden Wall!

6. Show us a rock?

uhhh okay so it's not a rock exactly but have this brick thing from the porch below my bedroom window :]

17: Tell us about your favorite character?

current favorite character is Jotaro Kujo. there will be spoilers and I got a little excited and wrote more than I meant to, so if you don't want jojo's bizarre adventure spoilers, don't click read more. <3

okay SO!

JOTARO KUJO!!!! He's one of the main characters of JoJo's Bizarre Adventure. Jotaro inherited magical powers, improbable buffness, beautiful blue eyes, and a homicidal vampire enemy from his great-great-grandfather, the first ever JoJo (Jotaro is the third to bear that nickname). He's a complex, self-contradictory character, but essentially he's a self-caged tiger. He loves deeply but he knows his own size and strength and claws, so he keeps himself away from his loved ones physically and emotionally; he thinks of himself as a monster before he ever actually becomes one. He's quiet but has an immense presence, a smothering fire under a blanket of his own making. He's seventeen in 1988, a Japanese high schooler who likes jazz and sumo and cigarettes and manga, who calls his mother slurs but drops his entire life to go save her life when she falls ill. He kills for her. He goes through plane crashes, car crashes, boat sinkings, over twenty assassination attempts, and any number of injuries for her. He makes a few friends and loses over half of them. He thinks he's only good for violence and his vampire-killing quest confirms that belief for him. He's tragic.

But that's just the part of the story where he's the main character. Later, he shows up as a visibly depressed but somewhat coping 28-year-old marine researcher, and I say good for him. Good For Him. He really said "yes, I'm the most powerful person in the world and I could spend my entire life doing Hero Stuff, but what I want is to study the ocean" and then went and did that. What I really enjoy about Jotaro Kujo is that he seems to be a bit self-aware about being A Manga Main Character, and that responsibility crushes him—but doesn't kill him completely.

He stops his own heart to play dead once, have I mentioned that? ???? clutches my chest and groans. I love a good self-destructive character, okay. Jotaro is (as I've been lovingly told by several friends now) Robin Catnip.

25: Talk about something you love?

Man, I just did, what do you want from me? (<- joke)

now for something completely different: hats. I really love hats and specifically my hat collection. for example, I have this really incredible, like, newsie cap? it's brown and cream with a front brim that I can pull down over my eyes to shade my eyes and emote with. It's very useful. adorable, too, if I do say so myself. Also, it's lightweight, so it's cool to wear in the summer. I've also got a silly grey baseball-cap thing that says "BLESS YOUR HEART" in pink and blue on the front in stitching, which makes me laugh. it also makes other people laugh. I am winning at fashion.

[theot3rulesofhyrule]

Having not played for quite a while now- though having played a LOT after launch... I find that My feelings on Tears of the Kingdom lead more towards dissatisfaction than anything else.

No hate to those who love it and enjoy every aspect!!



Don't get me wrong, I absolutely ADORE the original story that has been spun. I think it's intriguing and engaging and more. It's honestly the only reason I kept on playing after my first whole impression was done.

I also like the creativity and many elements of the game. The Depths, for one, have some of my favorite decorative plant life, and the designs of the Stewards I find to be very adorable and wonderful.

I am ALSO aware that the tales in and around The Legend of Zelda as a whole are TRAGIC. It's completely normal for the tone to be so sad and downright dismal at times.

But the game as a whole unit? I just.. so much of it is 'off' and just downright unpleasant for me. For one- one of my least favorite and biggest gripes is why oh WHY are those stones called SECRET stones?! That is one of the WORST possible things they could have been named/translated to. It warps the tone IMMENSELY especially as they're really not all that secret AT ALL. SACRED stones would have been divine and kept the tone much better... or something else. Secret stones is just... that's a "no" from me. Kills the mood every single time.

I don't know if the whole story of the Zonai is explained or revealed in further gameplay- but if it's not and that it's hinted at only a few times and never discussed... it's an extremely frustrating detail. There's always going to be mysteries, but this one had far too many chances to be explained and just wasn't (if it's not, of course... I don't rightly know- I stopped playing).

And then we get into actual gameplay....

I know now that it was a HUGE mistake to play Breath of the Wild right before diving into Tears of the Kingdom. My biggest mistake, in fact. I honestly didn't know how much I absolutely loved that game until faced with something so entirely different, but meant to be a part of it. And the controls... I was so used to my toggles being what they were that the change in TotK I still wasn't used to after over 105 hours of gameplay. I still messed up almost every time I needed to do something.

The menus too are just... there was no rhyme or reason to completely redesign them. Breath of the Wild had some amazing features and I feel the item screens was one of the that should have absolutely stayed. But instead they had a team completely and utterly revamp them. Very unpleasant and clunky to use.

There's also just... SO MUCH to do/keep track of. It honestly feels overwhelming in ways Breath of the Wild never was for me. There's so many quests, sure... but it just doesn't feel like you can take your time at all (or, if you do, like you're WASTING time)- and I HATE the quests that need you to do or be somewhere at a certain time of day... oof. So many shrines I just ignored because no thank you... AND all that stuff you can do? WAY harder. It is so challenging to do not only the shrines, but even basic side missions and quests. I seriously struggle with the poor Koroks because you really have to get it juuuuust right in so many ways. And if you mess up... welp. Be ready to just abandon it until the reset. (Accidently launching a Korok into the ocean when they needed to be up on a cliffside? ... That was some major frustration after the laughed 'oops.' for me T^T)

If it was a few hard challenges and/or tasks here and there I wouldn't be complaining, but the whole game is like that for me. Challenges after challenges after challenges to the point it killed my fun. Don't even get me started on how hard it is to build up Rupees (and I'm an AVID collector of items. The prices and difficulties there collecting enough with those SUCK).

All in all.. I was happy to see the progression of old characters, new faces, and the progression of the world as a whole... and yet they also did me SO dirty.... and Removed Kass- my all time favorite Rito- from the game entirely. Barely a whisper left of his existence. His challenges weren't always the most fun for me in BotW... but I was so happy to do them because I knew I got to see Kass again, progress his story, and I looked forward to the struggles I faced for such a well-written character.

I think I don't like this game because it's meant to be a challenge more than it's meant to really tell a whole, and wonderful (if tragic) story like Breath of the Wild was... and that makes me really sad. I haven't found much of it to be worthwhile enough to keep fighting through more of the game... and that's extra sad.

(also... controversial opinion- I don't like Ganondorf in this one. Something I haven't been able to put my finger on just feels wrong about the whole thing.)

[greyborn2]

kynesgrove, morthal, and throat of the world for the skyrim asks!

Oooh! Very quick - thank you dearly!

Kynesgrove; What is your favorite non-major city/town/settlement? Oh this is is a kinda tricky one. I'm going to assume this rules out all the hold capitals - even the really smol ones like Morthal - and Raven Rock. Hmmm... I think ultimately it comes down to either Deepwood Vale or Narzulbur. There is something incredibly captivating about the latter - how it clings to the mountainside and is divided between two parts with a narrow rope bridge connecting them. IDK. Its just always been my favorite orc stronghold in Skyrim from an aesthetic standpoint by a wide margin. Deepwood Vale, though. That might be a weirder choice. Like, ok, I get that it technically isnt even a proper settlement (in game). Its a dungeon. But for the Reachfolk living there it really must be a fairly major settlement. I'm gonna use that as my excuse anyway. Its just... ok so very few skyrim dungeons really wow me but Deepwood Vale has gotta be one of my favorite. The progression through it, the feeling of it being a real town to the Reachmen. A settlement and not just a camp. All the intriguing ties it has to cut Reachmen content and then how it was reused as the mainland base of the Icereach clan in ESO. I've just always loved it. I'm a sucker for when TES games jump a small, enclosed, sub-worldspace on you like Deepwood Vale, Blackreach, or the Forgotten Vale. PLUS!! It was actually the dungeon that first sparked my consistant love for the Reachfolk, so it has that going for it!!

Morthal; Do you enjoy exploring dungeons and ruins? Why or why not? Sadly not particularly. IDK, by and large dungeon design never really seems to have been a Bethesda speciality. They do really blend together. Doesnt help that I am so familiar with... well... ALL of Skyrim these days that I can navigate most places with my eyes half shut. That said, when Skyrim hits, it HITS. Definitely has some really good high points and those stick with me. *Cough* See Above *Cough* These days I actually take most of my joy in playing Skyrim more like a weird TES lifesim game. I vibe in towns, hone non-combat skills, run small errands and jobs that don't even touch combat, and just sorta... well... live life like a non-adventurer. Its a weird AF way to approach it, I know, but it sparks immense joy for me. ESPECIALLY with my well honed mod order!

The Throat of the World; How do you feel about "Season Unending"? See this is an especially difficult one because I don't really play Dragonborn characters xD. But ah, well. Ok. From the times I have played through it and conceptually. I really enjoy it in idea, though the execution is REALLY clumsy. Honestly I would adore a peace council option somehow as a side path in the Civil War entirely independent of the main quest. Just sorta jam it in there, somehow. Cant hate it too much, though, since its one of the necessary parts of the (very fiddly) method of entirely ridding Markarth of those dang unkillable Silver Bloods!!

[saetoru]

No but tee ur so right about the struggle to move on from sumeru. Like I’ve already played the whole archon quest to avoid getting spoiled and it’s been pretty good so far. But everything about sumeru and its story/character building was just so top-notch that Fontaine falls a little flat in comparison. *Mild spoilers warning* like the traveler meets focalors and I was just immediately hit with this immense longing to see nahida again. Like no archon will ever be nahida!!! She’s truly the peoples archon!!!!

And they’re definitely trying to set up a big mystery in the plot but for whatever reason even though the stakes seem like they’re supposed to be higher it just doesn’t hit with the same intensity as all of the absolutely insane shit the akademiya had going on. *Mild spoilers again* It probably has to do with the fact that it’s in relation to the people of Fontaine specifically and the traveler cannot be affected. Like it just doesn’t feel as personal. And given that it doesn’t feel as personal, there’s also not as much room for close character bonds to develop over a shared sense of urgency.

Sorry tee this ended up being a really long ramble but yeah ur so right ur feelings are so valid Fontaine just isn’t the same (at least rn) and I miss sumeru sm too

i think out of all the nations sumeru was my fav (altho the cultural representation aspects made me a bit upset) bc the story objectively was the most intriguing in this one but ALSO !! just the way the characters relationships were all built and connected was just rly nice and special to me. like even tho u hardly see much of candace she means the world to dehya and dehya means a good deal to everyone in sumeru city so like when candace comes to visit she’s still not rly out of place !! and it’s like 🥹 everyone is just connected to everyone and it’s a big family 🥹 and nahidas the mostttt endearing archon i think her story was my favorite but also her relationship with lumine was just more special than the other archons. i think the only other nation where everyone is close to being family like this is mondstadt with like kaeya and amber and eula and jean and klee—they’ve all had history in the knights and as kids so they’re all endearing too and that’s also !! why leaving mondstadt made me so upset !! and why i revisit so frequently just for the heck of it :,) and i think venti also has a slightly cuter relationship w lumine but idk like zhongli and raiden are lovely i liked them but they didn’t have that. idk. ig friendship that nahida had with traveler AND ALSO nahida tries so hard to rly connect w the ppl in sumeru she’s just the best archon i love love love her.

but i loved sumeru’s plot the most i think mondstadt was a bit boring until diluc showed up (lol) and liyue was fun but also a little less exciting and inazuma had so much potential but it was longgggg and tedious and also the miko training thing TOOK ME OUT. but sumeru was so fun and i enjoyed it thoroughly AND IDK IF ANYTHING WILL BEAT IT even the limited events in sumeru were so good sobs i AM RLY SAD WE ARE LEAVING. and also sumeru story quests are all my favs. dehyas was amazing and cynos was too and so was al haithams and i loved nahidas w the lore drops and even tighnaris had me emotional

i think i just have a bias LOL

but anyway I WILL FINALLY PLAY THE NEW QUEST just because i don’t wanna be spoiled so i might as well get it out the way BUT i’m glad someone shares the sentiment with me 🥹 sumeru will always be the best nation to me :,)

[glitchydyke]

silly q but what is my sims

ITS NOT SILLY DW!!! mysims is a series of games that were made for the wii and ds, and they r so so so important to me bc they were a huge part of my childhood <33 i even have ocs for each one bc they r everything to me. i’ll explain each one quickly under the cut :]

OKAY SO. there’s six games in total: the original is just called mysims, and then there’s mysims kingdom, agents, skyheroes, racing, and party <3

original mysims is an animal crossing kind of deal!! your character (customisable w both name and appearance) is what’s called an essence user - essentially someone who can use various elements around the world in order to build and create things. you’re called by mayor rosalyn to rebuild a town that was abandoned by its previous essence user and is now mostly deserted. the gameplay consists of moving sims in, and completing tasks for them where they ask you to build them things for their homes!! each sim belongs to a different interest group, like the personality groups in ac: there’s fun, cute, spooky, tasty, studious, and geeky. the type of sims you move in will affect what things they ask for (as in, cute sims will ask for things made with cute essences as opposed to spooky ones)

kingdom is similar to the original in that you’re completing tasks for people!! it’s a little more story based though: your character, a pig herder, is encouraged by your friends to apply to be the kingdom’s wandolier, which is pretty much the same concept as an essence user except this time you get a sick ass wand to go with it 💪 when you win the competition, you and your friends are asked by the king to go to island to island and improve morale around the kingdom, helping people with their problems and building things that they need. there’s also a few collection quests which i really like!! throughout the game you’re asked by various characters to collect figurines, flowers, fish, and pieces of armour! my second fave game of the series :]

AGENTS IS MY LOVE ITS MY COMFORT GAME OF ALL TIME. your character is a detective who longs for a real mystery to solve, and you get the chance when you’re hired as a special agent. one of the cases you get is from a woman named evelyn, whose house has been broken into. as you investigate and figure out what was taken, you realise it relates to a man from the first case you solved - when a man named morcubus attempted to steal a girl’s dog, and you proved the dog wasn’t his. through your cases you travel to various places (snowy mountains, industrial city, dinner party in a gothic mansion) and try to discover what morcubus is planning and how evelyn is connected to him. it’s my fave one of the series if you can’t tell 🫶

skyheroes is a piloting/shooter game where your character is found by a rebel group after crashing on a beach and developing amnesia! you join the group that saved you and learn they’re fighting a war against morcubus (he’s everywhere honestly) since he’s taken control of the skies and is now restricting people’s travel and trading. throughout the story you have to get other pilot groups to join your cause and rally against morcubus, while trying to find out who you were, what memories you lost, and how you came to be shot from the sky and crashed on the beach. i rlly love this one but i am yet to fully get through it bc despite enjoying it immensely i suck absolute dick at it

racing is. well. a racing game. it’s similar to simpsons hit and run in a way, with the missions being to drive around collecting things or racing against npcs. the plot is that your character is an aspiring racer, and is learning to properly race in a town called speedville (yeah) which is mostly abandoned since the previous star racer mysteriously left. you enter the championships and begin living your dream as a racer, but are soon met with morcubus (i’m telling you. everywhere) who’s trying to overtake speedville in order to use it for his own company and is attempting to stop you from winning any races so you can’t give speedville its glory back

party is kind of a mario party vibe!! it again begins with having to rebuild a rundown town, but this time you do it through entering festivals and winning at the minigames :] <- going to b real i do not have too much to say abt this one. there’s a character called mc emi who is my best friend ever tho

[tales-from-nocturnaliss]

30 Days of Autism Acceptance 2023 - catching up!

Figured it'd be a fun thing to do this year, since, y'know: this is the year that marked my official diagnosis as autistic. I'll answer several questions at once since I missed the previous days from not knowing this existed (social mishaps ftw!)

If you wanna participate, check out @birdofmay's blog or click through this link!

1 April: The typical introduction question! Tell us something about yourself.

I'm a 42-yo Belgian writer of Dark Fantasy who was diagnosed autistic this past January after a few years of absolute hell trying to figure out wtf was wrong with me. Turns out: likely intense autistic burnout!

On a more positive note though, I also likely have symptoms of ADHD - which is positive because it makes me able to function in the world on a more NT level I'd say, like doing things on a whim, enjoying change and exploring and, in a way, balancing the autism out. Mostly. The conflictual needs and wants have caused me a lot of mental and physical stress that I'm still trying to recover from.

On a fun note now: I have two cats I adore, a husband who's sometimes just as dysfunctional as I am (likely why he sniffed me out when we were still teens << but we only really met when I was 29; he remembered me from seeing me at school though!), currently unemployed because health, love to fangirl my characters (and anime dudes <<), somehow have a wide circle of friends of all nationalities and personalities because individuals are awesome and fascinating (I'm obsessed with psychology and emotions), and... Yeah. If you'd like to know anything else, do simply ask :D I love answering questions.

2 April: When were you diagnosed and when did you know that you're autistic? If you're self-diagnosed, when did you first suspect that you're autistic and when were you sure?

So it's both, actually. Last year, a good friend of mine talked to me about how she thought she was autistic, and shared a lot of info on women-specific autism... and that's when I saw that everything I thought I knew about autism was but a tiny fraction of a very wide spectrum. I recognized myself in what I read. I was on a quest for self-understanding to finally know what ailed me. I needed to know (which, let it be said, seems to be an autistic trait unto its own <<)

That was August. In October, I decided I had to be tested. November through December, five tests. Result in January. Diagnosis confirmed. I was ELATED. Because, finally, my whole life made sense. I am still so immensely relieved and happy to know.

3 April: How good or bad is your memory for things people say? For example verbal instructions.

My memory's gotten worse over time, likely from years of over-stress. I tend to let a lot of things leave my memory - including things people say. Verbal instructions... Because I know I have a tendency to forget, I prefer them written so I can read them over if/when needed. It's why I do everything official via email, put in appointments in my phone's calendar immediately, etc.

Funnily enough, I still remember a few words from one autism test I did back in November. So there's some logic to what's retained and what not. Repetition of words seems to be key.

4 April: Were/are you in special education? Regular school? Home schooled? A private school? Did it change over time? Did/do you like it?

I was in regular school. I'm 42. When I was a teen, depression wasn't even recognized as a real disease. Autism? Never heard of that. I was just an anxiety-ridden, fragile, naturally heavily bullied young girl who suffered ten years of depression afterwards and intense social anxiety. ... Damn I hated school so much. XD (and myself for just not fitting in :3; )

5 April: Did/do you have accommodations at school/IEP? If not, do you think it would help/have helped you?

I imagine it would have, had we known I was autistic.

6 April: Can you understand what people say when they talk fast, or do you lose track after a while? Was it different when you were younger?

Good question, with 'younger' feeling so far away... I did notice my speech recignition declined these past years, like when watching movies. However, since trying ginkgo and ginseng supplements to alleviate ADHD symptoms, and how magically they also alleviated anxieties and stress overall, I notice my speech recognition improved again.

So, to answer: in general I understand people who talk really fast, best of all in french (my native language). However, I do lose track if people talk in monotones. I think my brain gets bored and nopes out of there.

7 April: Do you have other diagnoses? What are they? Do you think that some could be incorrect?

I don't. Which I think is a mistake in itself, because I relate too intensely and completely to AuDHD perceptions. I was told it might be my higher IQ (officially 119, but I couldn't do the language tests as my brain demanded: in all three languages I know. So it's a bit higher) causing conflicts with the autism. Like, I was told a normal person thinks in a fast, straight line; autistics think in zigzags to get to the same point. They said I take the zigzags like they are a fast, straight line. And I'm like: okay sure I feel your point, but what about my mind always feeling torn in different directions and my inability to focus and how sometimes I adore change and other times not etc etc?

I'm not diagnosed AuDHD, but live that way anyway. Because that's what feels right. And trying to treat a possible ADHD has helped me. So instinct >>> NT experts, tyvm.

---

Aaaand tomorrow I'll continue these day by day :D woot to catching up and focussing and getting something done!

[nervouscupcakecreation]

Silymarin CF: Nurturing Your Skin with the Power of Nature

Personal Experience and Perspective

As an avid skincare enthusiast, I am constantly on the lookout for breakthrough products that can truly transform the appearance of my skin. In my quest for a radiant complexion, I came across Silymarin CF, a skincare marvel that combines the benefits of silymarin, vitamin C, and ferulic acid. With a wealth of personal experiences, unique perspectives, and insights, I am excited to delve into the wonders of Silymarin CF and share why it has become an essential part of my skincare routine.

Research and Investigation Data

To truly understand the extraordinary impact of Silymarin CF, extensive research and investigation into market trends, consumer preferences, and the development direction of the cosmetics industry is paramount. Through comprehensive exploration, it becomes evident that consumers increasingly seek skincare solutions rooted in nature, backed by science, and proven results. Silymarin CF has gained immense popularity for its synergistic combination of potent ingredients, targeting multiple skin concerns and delivering remarkable transformative benefits.

In-depth Exploration of Cosmetic Ingredients

Silymarin CF harnesses the potent efficacy of silymarin, a flavonoid extracted from milk thistle, along with the power of vitamin C and ferulic acid. Silymarin, known for its antioxidant and anti-inflammatory properties, helps protect the skin against environmental stressors while minimizing the appearance of redness and blemishes. Combined with vitamin C, an exceptional brightening agent, and ferulic acid, a powerful antioxidant, this formulation provides unparalleled protection against free radicals, improves skin tone, and reduces the signs of aging.

Cultural and Historical Perspectives

The utilization of natural ingredients is deeply rooted in cultural and historical practices around the world. Indigenous remedies have long revered the healing and rejuvenating properties of botanical extracts. Silymarin CF pays homage to these traditions while embracing cutting-edge technology, ensuring a harmonious fusion of ancient wisdom and modern skincare advancements. This remarkable product presents individuals of various cultures an opportunity to experience the transformative impact of nature on their skin.

Discuss Sustainability and Environmental Protection Issues

In an era where sustainability and environmental protection are at the forefront of consumer demands, the cosmetics industry has made significant strides. Silymarin CF, along with responsible brands, demonstrates a commitment to sustainable practices. From ethically sourcing ingredients to eco-friendly packaging, brands are embracing environmentally conscious initiatives. By selecting products like Silymarin CF, individuals can enjoy the benefits of effective skincare while supporting companies that prioritize both their well-being and the health of the planet.