#i am so upset it shows i know
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i am so pissed by the way First is being treated. My boy deserves much better than the crumbles he is getting. The way he is rightfully hurt and how he expresses it and still no real explanation is given apart from more confusion inducing words and actions!? Wtf. Sprite deserves the douchbag award by the amount of trust issues and trauma induced to someone
#very well done Sprite... thank you for your service as being a piece of shit of a boyfriend and friend#i am so upset it shows i know#not sorry though#twins the series
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"Stop saying Crowley won't help Aziraphale in S3 he'd go back to him in a HEARTBEAT and nothing would stop him" I get it no one likes the idea of Crowley being bitter after what happened for a long period of time but like can we at least acknowledge that he's currently going through probably the most emotional pain in his life since falling? Can we agree that he's opened his heart entirely - something you couldn't pay him to do unless the world is literally ending and he's desperate - to Aziraphale, and got shot down? Can we understand that he did it AGAIN only to lose Aziraphale again? Not that what Aziraphale did isn't without Crowley's own shortcomings (hiding the truth of Heaven's cruelty from him) but like,,,,
The appeal here isn't Scorned Crowley Doesn't Love Aziraphale Anymore, or Never Wants To Help Him Again, the appeal here is Crowley learning enough self respect to not just walk back right to Aziraphale like nothing happened after Aziraphale has had a pattern of consistently refusing him. Going years ping-ponging between "We're not friends I don't even know him" to "That's what friends are for right?" and "We're friends, why would you even say anything?" and "Friends? We're not friends. We are an angel and a demon!"
Like I get it, Crowley is a heartbreakingly forgiving person. Of course he's gonna forgive Aziraphale, I'll be surprised if he didn't forgive him by the time he walked out the bookshop door, but gdi he could at least grant himself the luxury of being at least a little irritated for longer than however long it takes to make a globe and some books float and angrily cry out to God in his flat. But due to the change of pace and dynamic that is establishing part of the conflict for Season 3, I just really like the idea of him for ONCE prioritizing himself and being like "Okay, fine. We'll get back at it when you're ready, then," instead of just taking Aziraphale back like his words and actions meant nothing to him, when clearly they have an effect on him.
What is Aziraphale going to learn if Crowley just accepts what he did so quickly, like he always has the entire time they've been friends? Idk maybe I'm just projecting too much darkness on their dynamic but I mean, if the pattern of Aziraphale pushing Crowley away/disrespecting him one day and then being fine with his friendship the next + Crowley never stopping to be like "Hey, that's not cool, at least give me a little credit" or smth was fine all along and will continue to be fine in the future, then why, after 6,000 years of being friends and loving this demon, can Aziraphale still not accept that Crowley is just fine the way he is, and instead got excited to promote him to an angel in a heartbeat once the opportunity presented itself? You can't blame all of it on Heaven when Aziraphale has demonstrated his free will/defiance to Heaven so many times. Or, I don't know, I guess maybe we can? Maybe I'm just craving too much angst to the point where I'm letting it cloud my analysis of canon. Idk.
#derpy speaks#good omens#good omens 2#no i dont think crowley is gonna ever hate aziraphale for what happened but he's allowed to be angry#he's allowed to be done with it all. he's allowed to be exhausted. just look at his face when he drives away.#meh. idk. but i dont know how i'll feel if crowley just INSTANTLY accepts aziraphale back in a situation involving#idk - ''hey help me stop the new apocalypse''#at least. without like. SOME pushback? it can even be something small like ''are you SURE you want ME to help you? do you really need me?''#doesnt have to be a straight refusal but i'd like SOME kind of action to show that crowley is putting his foot down for once#he deserves that self respect#do NOT reply saying that im insinuating that aziraphale is actively malicious or doing it on purpose.#everything he has done up until now is his own complicated response to all the trauma and guilt he's been through#but despite that crowley is STILL allowed to be upset... it's messy. i can write a whole paper about how this whole thing#is just unfortunate on both ends. again. we didnt get queerbaited we got communication baited 😭#but help me out here. am i just too fandom-brained to have these expectations from the story?#is there something obvious im missing that is making me sound like a complete asshole here? do i need to get my head out of the gutter?#someone please explain it to me if so because whatever it is‚ i can't find it#not queued
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i would like to say my ideal PJO adaptation (if i was being physically forced against my will to have to pick a live action adaptation over an animated one for some reason) would be a combo like writing of the musical + casting of the show + visuals of the movies
BUT the show actually does have the playwright for the musical as one of the major writers for like three episodes and that did nothing for it. so...
#pjo#riordanverse#pjo tv crit#i do love the casting for the musical lots and lots though#it was really good#i do also have some nitpicks for show casting but they're largely inconsequential#like majority i very much enjoy and think are cast well#i only have one i'd say im actually disappointed with and that's Poseidon. idk he just feels. bland??? does that make sense?#like idk maybe it's the costuming but im not getting Sea God *or* Fishing Dad from him#like i think i kinda see what they were going for and i saw some gifs of him in another show where he plays a pirate and its like#okay. *little* bit better. but idk im just not getting Poseidon from it#in general most of the immortals in the show dont feel very Immortal(tm) but thats definitely mostly just the writing/show itself#not any reflection of the casting#my only other two are i would have liked plus sized Clarisse. i am VERY sad we didnt get that#Dior is a VERY good Clarisse though so i'm not too upset about it. i like her Clarisse energy. the yelling is fantastic.#my most controversial pjo tv take is im still meh on Walker. like he's fine. but like he's kind of Just Fine to me so far#its probably mostly the writing being bad but he hasnt grown on me as Percy yet. i can tell he has the energy though in interviews n stuff#and the main trio dynamic in interviews and stuff is *very* good. i just wish the show writing was better#because the casting IS very good but they have so little to work with. you can really tell theyre trying their best#i like to joke the show would be better if they just set the cast loose in the woods doing in-character improv#like its clear basically all of them know their characters SUPER well. id watch 8 episodes of in the woods pjo cosplay improv.
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Every single time I draw for an anime I think to myself "never again will I draw for an anime" and then I am proven wrong. So here, take my daughter Lulu.
#brave bang bravern#bbb lulu#how the heck do you tag for this show#i never feel like i do anime characters justice tbh so i get really self conscious about art i do for shows#but honestly whatever shes adorable please enjoy my daughter#i gotta finish watching it - im on ep10#and i am giving updates to two people on discord as i watch and i like hearing#i have no idea whats going on but its a wild trip at least#and im like yeah trust me as the one watching it i also have no idea whats going on and its a fever dream without the fever#an acid trip without the acid#i really have NO idea what the intended audience is for this show but lewis the love of my life#i will never be over the time you said Nani - oh shit#because one of my favorite things to say to someone i know who has a major in japanese is#nani the fuck - BECAUSE IT INFURIATED HIM the first time i said it and he was so upset#now he expects it and is fine with it but the nani oh shit will live rent free ... thank you sir mr american i love you#also not to spoil anything even though i probably dont have the brain capacity to do so correctly#i really liked when someone was saying some weird stuff to him and he just says im sorry? in english#me in japan just saying im sorry feels like it would track thats me thats the american im sorry
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giggling and kicking my feet and prancing into my armchair to watch this annoying guy do embarrassing things on my tv show with his hot friend . and also Tim is there
#when i was in college i tried watching psych and didnt really get it#but now i'm much older and able to appreciate immature media to a much greater degree and also sufficient time has passed#that it actually IS possible to get nostalgic for the years in which i was in high school#and also tim is literally in this one . its tim!! pre-hot but still. i mean. i guess you could consider him not BAD looking#but the moment he became a longhair guy with a salt and pepper beard he became so many thousands of times hotter#that the whole clean-cut look is positively uninspired . sitting here watching this show like . oh my god he doesnt know he's hot yet#one of those actors that. due to my strange and esoteric media education. ive basically watched the career of backwards#galavant came out before seasons nine and ten of spn. or at least concurrently . which means i am watching his earliest stuff last#ahhh tim. thee biblical#psych#this isnt even about those other guys anymore#i think also the first time i watched psych i was really mad at my dad and he and i were in a horrible phase of our relationship#and also he was just a dick in general at the time. so i got upset when the character and his dad started getting along#i was like fuck that . i hate you old guy#and i quit midway through s1#i think i'm on the first episode i didn't vaguely remember from back then it has a cat
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the way im seeing so much hate for agatha all along's finale like....you guys just didn't get it like i did omg. i have a couple things i wouldve done differently (i really expected agatha to be dead dead at the end and get to go see nicky, but upon actually thinking about it i like this better because her story most definitely isn't finished yet and i don't think it was ever supposed to be within this show (plus we're not burying our gays!!! yay!!)) but overall i liked it. i also feel like apparently i was the only one who never thought we would get a happy agatha and rio ending? it always felt like their story was leaning more towards them having to learn to let go of each other. idk i just don't think it was bad enough to warrant the amount of hate im seeing
#also lowkey people are being kind of weird about them kissing#like they were so obviously head over heels in love with each other for probably centuries and people are mad they've never kissed before?#you guys know love is way more than physical right. right#am i making this up or is it kind of strange behaviour to be so mad about that being their first and only kiss#sorry this is turning into a rant but i for one actually loved the kiss because it kind of cemented how deep and genuine their love was#like they COULDNT kiss until now because it would kill agatha and thats so deeply tragic#but their love didnt have to be physical for it to be real#of course they dont necessarily have to kiss to be *physical* with each other iykwim lol#and i just think its such an odd stance to have to be upset because theyve apparently never kissed before#idk this might not even be a widely held opinion i just saw a few posts being mad about it lmao#and it made me mad back#ill probably have so much more posting to do about this show later#agatha all along#agatha all along spoilers#agatha all along finale#agatha harkness#agatha x rio
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Christians:
#personally I'm not so much torn as I am stretched every which way#I've thought about it a great deal over the years and landed on all manner of positions#one of my earliest memories of the topic is watching that episode of Little House in which Mrs. Olsen is the substitute teacher#and thinking the people of Walnut Grove were very silly to be upset that she showed the students nude Renaissance art#but now I'm like 'well just how silly were they?' and I truly don't know#and I'm sure this poll won't settle my mind on it but I'm curious#x#Christianity#history
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i have no stake in this whatsoever since i’ve never even watched good omens and absolutely 100% unequivocally think it’s a good thing that an abuser is seeing the consequences of his actions but i don’t really see the point in shortening the 3rd season? rewriting it so he doesn’t get money from it? yes absolutely, but if that’s the reason, why not delay the season and do a full six episode rewrite? or just cancel it altogether instead of an inevitable disappointing finale. he’ll still be receiving royalties from the first two seasons and whatever ideas they use for the episode plus whatever he’s already contracted to receive so making a short season feels like it’ll impact the cast and crew more than him; they won’t be paid for a full season of work that they were expecting to have in an increasingly unstable industry
#i dont know how streaming royalties work for all i know hes contracted to get money per episode or something#when compared to a full seasons worth of story an hour and a half isnt enough time to satisfyingly wrap it up#so saying its for the fans is a bit of an eh thing#especially when they will probably either go off the book or his notes so he will still be paid for his ideas#i dunno#obviously a tv show is the very last priority when it comes to something like this#and i havent heard anything about how netflix is handling it considering sandman (thats him right? i think it is)#but people are entitled to be upset about this dont be mean#people have invested their emotions into these characters and this world theyre allowed to be upset#just acknowledge its not the most important thing and move on#but yeah out of everyone it feels like this decision impacts him the least#unless im completely missing something#but i dont think i am#it feels like this is more amazon covering their ass then a genuine desire to not give money to an abuser#which considering amazon is a multi billion dollar company is exactly what theyre doing#coming out of my cage and ive been doing just fine.txt#good omens#neil gaiman#aziraphale#crowley#ineffable husbands#good omens s3#good omens season 3
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#some thoughts incoming idk if i should share but i need to put them somewhere#it's hard being in the yr fandom since the finale when you don't share the same vision and opinion as the rest#and people make future wilmon posts or write post s3 fics (which many exist now) they just don't align with your idea at all#and they're not exciting to me at all and the whole concept just makes me upset#i don't wanna imagine Wille as a 'normal' person (not that that's ever possible anyway which the show loves to ignore)#like I'm sorry but i didn't come to the show to watch an ordinary love story and have them lead an ordinary life#the idea of Wille being a future king and them navigating that royal life together is so much more interesting#i hate that that isn't canon anymore and when ppl make posts about them it's not about that or that would only be seen as a negative thing#i don't wanna imagine a life where they are 'normal' that isn't appealing to me at all and it sucks seeing everyone embrace it#and it's like you're not allowed to want something else or think differently bc that makes you the bad person and you're just wrong#i can't be excited about their future (also bc i don't really see them going strong in the future with how they messed them up in s3)#(i also didn't want to know what could possibly happen in the future i wanted that to stay open and just be in the present)#and seeing everyone else excited and happy about it makes you feel horrible and very alone and disconnected in the fandom#i don't wanna take it away from them but i also would love to see other takes but that's basically impossible now#am i the only person who feels this way or are there any other who can relate? pls let me know#i already feel like ppl are gonna attack me for this but it's been hard especially now with Simon's month and seeing so many interpretation#navigating ao3 has also become difficult now#it's hard finding fics to read where wille stays crown prince and you don't have to be scared for that to change#i just can't read any canon compliant fics anymore and i hate it bc i hate to disagree with canon#i normally don't do that bc canon is important to me and i don't want to reject it and create my own fantasy#and that's what's upsetting#anyway sorry i had to write this#personal
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Jingdou area man suffers through a very confusing day at the office with gremlin rival-turned-gremlin coworker
Sir Cannot Control His Expressions
The smirk of someone who is trying to be Professional™️
Bonus: How To Flirt When You're a ND Rules Lawyer™️ - tell him you'll report him for being a corrupt bastard and sashay away. 10/10, Works every time.
#seriously I am so loving Yan Bingyun#I know people were realllllllllll upset about it not being XZ#but#wu xingjian#is doing a fucking phenomenal job#also? why does fx have FIRE chemistry with every single person in this show???#zhang ruoyun#has some kind of magic I guess#joy of life 2#fan Xian#Qing yu nian 2#Yan Bingyun#highlynerdy edits#JoL 2 edits
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The fact that I'm supposed to be doing something right now and all I can think about is KYLE ADAMS' GRANTAIRE AND HOW I WAS TOO SCARED TO GO SAY HI TO HIM AFTER THE SHOW BUT I NEED HIM TO KNOW THAT HIS GRANTAIRE WAS THE HIGHLIGHT OF MY TIME IN THE LES MIS FANDOM AND I COULD NOT STOP WATCHING HIM THE ENTIRE SHOW
I need him to know
Later edit cuz I was tired when I wrote this: Kyle Adams plays Grantaire exactly how I imagined him in the brick and listening to the songs. He's that good
#im totally normal about grantaire#i love grantaire so much#actually my favorite character#just#*screams*#when you have a cynic#and he dies with a believer#i cant#its just so#literally cannot put it into words#and ya know i love hadley fraser as Grantaire#but kylie adams was just so amazing at it#its been a while since i went to the show and i am not normal about this#been in a very les mis mood recently too#les miserables#les mis#grantaire#les amis#les amis de l'abc#theres a reason my les mis book fell in half right where they introduced grantaire#i read that part too many times#dang i met a few other actors too after the show but was too nervous to talk to him#im actually kinda upset about that#kyle adams#if i could be in any show or any play as wny character i would want to be grantaire#hes just so amazing
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Two-faced
#beep boop#my art#vox hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel vox#vox#cat vox#npd#actually npd#sketch#For friends who see this (am not putting this in the main thing bc it Vox and i want ppl to b able to reblog it about hazbin vox an go ooh#hes so evil ooh)#But its not meant to be like the friedly bit is a lie and the grumpy bit is real#hes being honest in both cases#hes having narc rage that he knows is illogical so even if hes grumpy and annoyed#it really IS no problem and he DOES love you#hes just also AUGH the world. not catering to me always? fuck my gay baka life#i hope this doesnt make anyone less comfortable talking to me i am just like! showing emotions i have being honest and stuff#not really a vent bc im not upset about it i just think its interesting#and fits vox's presenting tv persona thing he does#but really yall can tell me anything or if you have an issue even if i have narc emotions and feel annoyed or angry#its just a feeling.#Really its no problem at all.
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Sooo, I thought about Lunar going He only hit me once about Eclipse, and stumbled across this really cool tumblr Blog talking about it
https://www.tumblr.com/annakenziesworld/750845019184922624/eclipse-only-ever-really-hit-me-once?source=share
I wanted to show you the angst, like a puppy shows it's owner a cool stick it found
Me to Lunar: Why the fuck you lying, WHY YOU ALWAYS LYING🎶
YEYSYESYYES I SAW THAT !!!! I've been thinking abt it sm since I saw it actually bc, while it was likely just a case of "it happened so long ago we forgor what happened", it can 100% be interpreted as Lunar repressing most of the memories from that time and only remembering the most "major" event and it's so fascinating to me! Bc like, I've thought it was weird they said he only hit them once too, bc I've always distinctly remembered Lunar telling Moon that Eclipse hit him twice!!
But as the clips show, honestly, it's a good bit over twice!! It's just probably likely that Lunar didn't clock it as anything notable or important because Eclipse just... kinda always treated them like that. They remembered the two hardest hits because those were particularly upsetting, but everything else just blended into the mix of "shitty ways Eclipse treats me." yk??? And then over time, more shit got repressed or forgotten, and they can only remember the day in the cafe.
Like again I know it's very likely entirely accidental, but it ended up being a pretty solid way to show memory issues via trauma! And that's not even accounting for the fact that depression (and their retconned ADHD 😔) can also cause memory problems!! So this little blunder can be attributed to their fucked up mental health in-universe which is both cool rep!! but also breaks my heart over Lunar so much BSJABSJS
#asks#anon#i had already shared a few thoughts via my reblog side blog but unfortunately i am unwell about these two so i am overjoyed at the-#-oppertunity to ramble more thank u anon HEJAHAJSH#i feel like a lotta people forget that during traumatic times of ur life there's just... a lotta holes. yk?#so even if tbe second hit /was/ upsetting enough for them to remember when they went to talk to moon#it probably just ended up getting shoved in the 'lets not think about that' box without them noticing#and unless something triggers these memories then... they'll never know!#and it's not their fault that they aren't telling the whole truth!! they can only remember so much!#so it's not necessarily lying. they just literally cannot remember any of the other times they were hurt. yk??#sun and moon show#the sun and moon show#tsams#sams lunar#xero thoughts and rambles
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Idk if this is a hot take but why is it always “Kai slaved away and worked his ass off to raise his sister” and never the other way round or them working hard together?
Like, I know he’s older but in the show, does he really… act older? Like if you think about Kai and Nya’s dynamic yknow? Because from my understanding:
When Kai and Nya are introduced we see Kai fail at making a sword and Nya being the one to chide him for it. Kai makes an overconfident statement about wanting to be a better blacksmith than his father. This suggests that one, Kai is rather rash as well as inexperienced (something that lines up with the rest of his character arc in the pots and also generally), with Nya being the more mature figure in contrast
Also just a note but in the shorts: “I can handle it!” “No you can’t, stupid”
Kai frequently being very good at neglecting people or things: leaving Lloyd at an arcade whilst being focused on finding samurai x, not even knowing samurai x was Nya or that she only did it because she felt left out by him, completely abandoning both Nya and Lloyd in s3 (and Ik he was going through it at the time, but in line with the fandom’s characterisation of him)
Kai in season 5: “After I lost my dad, I lost my way. But I was lucky to have my sister watch over me”
Generally, their dynamic isn’t one where Kai really provides for Nya at all. In fact, judging by the fact that Nya can make entire mechs and Kai struggled to make a sword, Nya was probably busting her ass to provide for Kai. And judging by the s5 quote, that’s probably true. I’m not saying Nya raised Kai, it just rubs me the wrong way when she’s treated like a decorative flourish to a narrative that paints Kai as a burnt out child who was forced to grow up too soon especially since that is such a mischaracterisation of him in the first place.
#all I’m saying is that it’s weird we undersell all of the sister’s capabilities just so we can present the brother as tormented and burdened#ignoring the fact that he spent all his days in the gap between the pilots and s1 playing video games#like I’m sorry kai is a pathetic baby girl in the show and I LOVE HIM THE WAY HE IS#okay yeah I snapped a little#I’m just tired of everyone mischaracterising him yknow#like I’m sorry bestie he’s not that capable he’s a loser man and I am ready to love loser men#i just think that it’s an incredibly stereotypical dynamic to have one male character who everyone completely#over exaggerates their struggles to the point of making it seem that everyone else in the story either doesn’t suffer or is an asshole for#not noticing the suffering of this one hot guy#this happens in many fandoms and I think this is what’s happening here#hhhhh#I’m sorry if Kai is ur favourite and this opinion upsets you I don’t mean to be bitch#I’m just really not into this interpretation of him#again this isn’t a dog at his character I just thing people don’t get him a lot of the time#and you know what Nya is also super undersold as a character#like where’s the fucking Nya Lloyd sibling content?#she mentored Lloyd too? she taught him how to ride dragons she stayed with him on the bounty she and Lloyd only had eachother in s9#what about them??#Kai gets too woobified and Nya doesn’t get woobified enough that’s my opinion#alright I’m done sorry#Ninjago#rant#ig this is a#ninjago analysis#i won’t tag characters cuz I don’t want to make anyone upset#and again I’m sorry if I do
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Marinler wedding but when the priest says "you may now kiss the bride" Mariner dips him
#he's blushing very hard after btw#marinler#beckett mariner#brad boimler#bradward boimler#i am having Thoughts ok#also apparently this is my first time posting about marinler on this blog?? weird. but yea#also thing about marinler is i do not actually need them to be canon and will not be upset if they aren't. like i'd enjoy if they were but#either way is fine. compare to tendiford which while i do not NEED to be canon in the strictest sense i literally always assumes was 100% g#going to be canon. note that i started with hear all trust nothing (i like quark ok. in case you couldn't tell from the url) and then watch#watched the whole show linerarly after. and i didn't even know their names yet but by the end of the ep i was like 'oh so these two are end#endgame ok cool' and i have only started to ship them more since. but that just as an aside.#i mean this is literally a one sentence marinler post yet here i am telling you my tendiford history but whatever that's who i am now. also#i don't think this has a shot at being canon but i would very much enjoy if all four of them became a polycule. possibly plus t'lyn. yea.#anyway#ld#star trek#lower decks#star trek lower decks#lwd#st lwd#original posts fresh from quark's pussy
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Hi! Long time no yap but I've been really bothered by this thing and I know you're just the person I can go to with this (even if we don't always end up agreeing at times).
I got into a tiff with someone in a comments section of a post that was about Amy (Which character do you think deserved to become a villain? or something similar). They brought up Amy's abuse of her boyfriend. I may have tried to defend Amy (key word is tried. I am officially rubbish at debating) but then I may have said something? Because they said that I (and apparently a lot of other fans) was excusing Amy's abuse because of her trauma. It got me stumped because isn't young Amy's treatment of Rory rooted in her trauma? Did I miss the memo where we separate trauma and abuse? Am I missing something?
That statement bothered me a lot because if there's one thing I never want to do it's defend an abuser. So here I am, humbly asking and hoping to clear the muddy waters.
Your really confused and disturbed moot, Tia 💌
TIA!!!!! Thanks for the ask 💌 , and I send you all the hugs.
Discussion of abuse, trauma, ableism, infidelity, and unhealthy relationship dynamics beneath the cut.
(First off… while I really appreciate your faith in my explaining skills <3 <3 <3 my passion for traumatized characters and mentally ill+neurodivergent rights doesn't make me especially qualified to fully clear muddy waters especially not knowing the full context, but I feel you, and what follows is my informed perspective!)
Speaking generally first, harm done in media is best examined by the impact on the audience, with a different lens than harm done to real people. While relatable experiences in media can be useful and validating and incredibly important, you can’t be “defending an abuser” when the abuse is fictional. It's actually normal for traumatized/ND/mentally ill people to project onto mentally ill villains, when villains are the only significant representation for those stigmatized symptoms in a media landscape that excludes and demonizes us simply for existing. RTD can't stop people who hallucinate from reclaiming the Master's Drums and projecting onto the Master, for example — 90% of the best Doctor Who psychosis fic by psychotic authors is about the Master, whether RTD likes it or not. It's not true crime.
(This is speaking generally. Amy Pond is very much not the Master.)
Abuse is a behavior, and there can be many reasons for it, but reasons based in trauma don’t make it not abuse (some forms of generational trauma can propagate abusive parenting styles, when the parent thinks abusive parenting is normal, or lives entirely vicariously through their child). This absolutely should not be taken to mean trauma correlates with abusive behavior; rather that abusive behaviors from traumatized people are more likely to present in specific ways.
Abuse is also a targeted behavior, based in control — not consistently displayed C-PTSD symptoms as seen in Season 5 Amy Pond through many aspects of her life. Mental health symptoms don't become abuse just because they hinder one partner from meeting the other partner's needs. Any life event can do that.
Without knowing the context of the arguments, this is the aspect of their relationship I've seen you talk about before (which I also feel strongly about), and what I assume is what you were debating? So, here I will talk specifically in regard to Season 5.
We all know Amy — she's never attached to Leadworth because she never wanted to leave Scotland, no steady therapist because none of them stick up for her, can't stick with one job yet her first choice is a job that simulates intimacy because her avoidant behavior (a known trauma response) isn't sustainable to her wellbeing. Rory knows her fears of commitment stem from her repeated abandonments, it’s why he’ll always wait for her, and it's why he blames the Doctor “You make it so they don't want to let you down.”, who apart from having caused a lot of her trauma, has actively taken advantage of her being the “Scottish girl in the English village” who's “still got that accent,” because he wants to feel important, so yeah, I think interpreting Amy's issues (and how Amy and Rory transverse them) as Amy abusing Rory indicates a fundamental misunderstanding of their relationship, as well as a misunderstanding of the (raggedy) Doctor’s role in Amy’s formative self-image (which of course she works through in Season 6, but I am sticking to Season 5).
Abuse is always based in control. That just doesn’t fit here. While Amy's detachment from her real life includes things like calling Rory her “kind of boyfriend” (which she is upfront about to his face; differing commitment levels isn't abuse, though it can be a relationship red flag for both parties IRL) — her Season 5 disregard of Rory’s feelings occurs only in response to the fairytale embodiment of her trauma. It's never a response to Rory; it's a response to the Doctor, who stole her childhood and led her by the hand to her death. She cheats on Rory with the Doctor in her bedroom full of Doctor toys, drawings, models, she made from childhood to early adulthood.
(And yes, like many repeatedly-traumatized people, Amy is prone to being sensitive and reactive. Take her “Well, shut up then!” line in The Big Bang; but given Rory responds to this by hugging her, clearly he doesn’t take it as her actually dismissing him. He knows her better than that.)
And by no means do I meant to imply this is fair to young Rory, poor Rory, who's left struggling with the feeling that his role in her life is in competition with the role of her trauma (aka the Doctor). But not every unhealthy relationship dynamic is unhealthy because of abuse. Labelling Amy's treatment of Rory in Season 5 more accurately isn't the same as excusing her harmful choices — but making mistakes is part of being human, Amy's mistakes are certainly understandable, and she works through them out of love for Rory.
If there's one thing to say about Moffat women, it's that Moffat allows his female characters the same grace that the male characters *coughTENcough* have always had, to hurt and struggle and make realistic mistakes and overcome those mistakes and to heal without being demonized.
Amy isn't perfect, but she is a fully realized character, and her story gives us a resonant depiction of childhood trauma.
#abuse#rtd critical#anti rtd#im NOT really anti rtd but im tagging it that because some people block that tag and uhhhh this post strays into rtd critique#maybe he does regret how he wrote the master! we'll never know because rtd is very anti-admitting-his-own-mistakes#words by seaweed#anyways tia i am. SO relieved you’re not upset with me about our last disagreement?#i high key jumped to conclusions after the lack of reply to the last DM? so thank you for this ask it's great to hear from you#sorry you were in a debate about this! that sounds extremely awful.#anyway i'm gonna WAIT at least a week to tag Amy and Rory to avoid this showing up in the character tags right away haha#because I am KINDA scared the anti-media-literacy ppl will find this (I had to include the first part tho its important)#(lack of distinction between harm to audience *in fiction* and irl harm *to actual ppl* leads to problematic public apologies where-#-public figures apologize to fans they let down *instead* of the people they actually hurt. no it doesn't work like that)#(parasocial relationships are not more important than real victims agency or privacy)#and I am planning to make a post at some point about the nd aspects of Amy+the Doctor's connection which this stuff IS relevant to soooooo#am I going hard on specifying Season 5 Amy to under the assumption that the uncharacteristic Rory-slapping isnt whats bein talked abt?#maybe. its not in character.#editing to say..... yanno what? ive come to terms with not all the posts with the following tag been about the doctor#(eleventh) doctor is neurodivergent tag#editing again to add character tags:#Amy pond#Rory williams
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