#i am so glad someone like cove comes into my life that way i have a real pal

[bitemegamer]

Me, from the future: I should have seen this coming, tbh

[imaginepirates]

Everything I Need

Jack and the reader both have feelings for each other, but have yet to act on them. When the reader sees him kissing someone else, they think he's already in a relationship, and they begin pushing him away to save their own emotions.

@emdrabbles @tesserphantom @viper-official @hellspawn-brownies @groovy-lady @ghoulishbehaviour @kittenlittle24

~3100 words

~~~~~~~

The distinct slide of warm sand through your toes pulled a smile to your face. After six long months of roving, the Pearl had made port back at Tortuga, and your feet hit solid ground for the first time in half a year. As much as you loved sailing, a ship was only so large, and you could only walk the same fifty yards of deck so many times before it began to drive you batty. 

The scenery never changed on the open ocean, not truly. Oh, every day the water was a new shade, and the sky a new color, and the patterns of the waves and clouds never took the same shapes, but even when the sea changed from serene to angry, wind was still wind, and water still water. 

The little cove you’d tucked yourself into was a welcome change to all that. You relished the vibrant greens and yellows and reds of the plants, as well as the chirping of birds, and even the singing cicadas. Later, you would enjoy new company, too, and new stories alongside, but for the moment, you were content to sit only with the company of the land. 

Your seclusion, however, didn’t last long. A figure dropped down next to you, barefoot with their trousers rolled up to the knee. It hadn’t taken Jack long to find you; he knew you too well. It should have annoyed you more, that he always knew where you would be, but his company was never unwelcome. 

“Glad to be back ashore?” 

You accepted the bottle he held out to you, taking a swig before answering. “In all honesty, I am. But you’re already itching to be back out there, aren’t you?” You nudged him with a knee, and he smiled back at you, used to your teasing. 

“Can’t help myself, love. The ocean calls to me, and who am I to deny her? I have everything I need out there.”

“Except rum. You come back for that.”

“Except rum,” he agreed. 

It was easy, conversation between you. Jack had a way about him like a gentle morning tide, an ebb and flow to his words and thoughts, simple to wade through and enjoyably warm. A part of you wondered whether he shared this side of himself with everyone, and another, selfish part of you secretly hoped he didn’t. 

The truth you had come to accept was simple: after many long years of knowing him, somewhere along the line you’d fallen a little in love with your captain. That truth, of course, was a maddeningly frustrating one. There were many unspoken rules aboard a ship, the first and foremost being that no part of the crew was to have romantic, or god forbid sexual, relations with the captain. It was a grand violation of the fragile ecosystem that was ship life. Compounded with that fact was the deeper, more meaningful reason you couldn’t bring yourself to confess— Jack was a creature of freedom, and in desiring his affection, you would be denying him the full range of liberty he needed. It was a thing you simply couldn’t do. 

“What are the chances Anamaria has already gotten into a fight?” Jack was still staring out over the horizon, that characteristic gleam in his eye. 

“What are the chances she’s already won?” You knew Anamaria, and there was a high likelihood that by the time you got to whatever tavern she was in, someone would already owe her money. And have a broken jaw. 

Jack stood, helping you to your feet and corking his bottle. “I won’t let you be reclusive all night. I’ll need someone sympathetic there when Anamaria decides it’s my turn.”

“I’d pay good money to see that.”

Jack feigned offense. “How could you?”

“Because if there’s someone knocking you around, you likely deserve it.”

You walked into town like that, joking and placing meaningless bets on who had gotten up to what while you were both away. Tortuga was exactly like you remembered it, a city much like the sea, where things never really changed. Every building was still itself, if a little more tattered and worn. Not that you minded. That exact attribute was what made it perfectly suited for a group of pirates. The place had its charm, even amongst the heaps of mud and rusty door-joints. Old and battered, just like you all were.

Jack slipped past you into a crowded bar, and you promptly followed. You were overwhelmed all at once by the rowdy music, the sea of voices, the mix of smells, the different fabrics, and the heat created by so many bodies in so little space. You tried peeking around for a familiar face but had no such luck. Instead, you accepted the random fluke of drink Jack had plucked off a bar and set in your hands. 

It took careful navigation through multiple rooms before you saw anyone you knew. Sure enough, Anamaria had a stack of coins on the table in front of her, and half the room away a man was nursing a black eye and bloody nose. 

You settled down next to her, eyeing the considerable amount of money she’d won, grinning. You could swear she had some sort of gambling god sitting on her shoulder, whispering in her ear and telling her the right cards to play. Jack had wandered off somewhere else, presumably in search of something new to drink. You watched him go, letting your eyes linger on his form in the dim light, comfortable in the knowledge he couldn’t catch you, only to get an elbow in the ribs from Anamaria who sat just beside you. 

“You have got to stop staring at him like that.”

“Hey now, don’t be unfair.” You held up your hands, reluctantly tearing your eyes from Jack. “It’s not that bad. I really doubt many people have noticed.”

“Only half the crew. If excitement onboard doesn’t pick up, we’ll be betting on you two next.”

“That’s unfair. Pintel and Ragetti provide ample entertainment.”

Speaking of those two, you noticed them across the room, clearly bickering over some newfound subject. They always found ways to inspire philosophical discussion, even if the philosophy at hand was objectively ridiculous. 

Unfortunately, though, Anamaria was right. Your feelings for Jack were probably a bit obvious, despite trying to keep them to yourself. You were afraid Jack would find out, or worse — that he already knew. But you couldn’t keep yourself from noticing his smile, his laugh, any simple expressions of true joy that weren’t part of his facade. He put on an act, you knew, for most people. The perfectly suave pirate come to rob you of all earthly riches, leaving you dazed and a little enthralled. An alluring storybook character come to life. It was those real smiles, though, that you couldn’t shake from your brain, that kept you staring after him even as the moment faded and passed. 

Then there were the endearments, said out of habit if anything else, but they still had their charm. Every time he called you ‘love’, you got this warm sensation in your chest like the feeling of a good drink, spreading to your stomach and dancing across your limbs. Flirtation was in his nature, but that didn’t make it any less effective.

You sighed, taking a sip of the mystery drink Jack had handed you. It was some sort of cocktail, pleasantly fruity with a hint of grenadine*. Jack had disappeared, so your focus shifted toward watching other bar-goers. A tall blonde sawed a whipping fiddle, the tune drawing dancers to the center of the floor. The dancers, of course, were too drunk to keep their coordination, and the resulting chaos of limbs had you snickering. 

Tortuga really was the last bastion of revelry in the ever-shrinking world. You let yourself enjoy it; there was enough time for overthinking things later. For the time being, you relaxed back into your seat, cheering on Anamaria when another poor sod challenged her to cards, wheezing with laughter as Gibbs attempted a jig, blushing and breathless as the fiddler pulled you into the crowd for a dance of your own. 

By the time early morning rolled around, the bar was full of passed-out patrons, people napping wherever they could find room. You rose groggily to your feet, unaware of how long you’d been asleep, and staggered to the door. The outside air made a refreshing contrast to the stifling heat inside the bar, and the smell of brine helped clear your head. You rubbed your eyes and straightened up. 

You walked around the back of the bar in hopes of finding clean water with which to wash your face, only to see a handsome, redheaded young-man with their fingers buried in the front of Jack’s shirt. And their mouth firmly on his. 

You whipped around before either of them could notice you, stalking back the way you came. You didn’t hear the soft thud of the redhead’s body hitting the wall as Jack pushed them away, nor Jack’s voice, calm but firm, denying any further advances. Instead, you followed your feet until they hit sand, curling up in the cove you’d found the previous day. 

You should have known. You should have known Jack would already have someone, someone he was closer to than you. You couldn’t be the only person in love with him—if you’d noticed all the wonderful things about him, other people undoubtedly had, too. Jack had been a pirate for a long time, and had a whole past you knew nothing about. Of course there would be someone else. 

You curled and uncurled your fingers in the sand. The breeze off the ocean did nothing to cool the hot wave of jealousy that rolled over you. You let it sit there, broiling and festering and simmering within you, allowing yourself to stew over it. Warm tears fell over your cheeks, and you wiped them away angrily with the back of your hand.

Then it was gone. Like the recession of the morning tide, your jealousy left you in one fell swoop, and only exhaustion and emptiness remained as you hugged your knees. You had no right to feel jealous of Jack’s lover. You and Jack had never shared a romantic relationship, and you had no claim to him. All you had were the feelings you kept to yourself, and it was your own fault for never acting on them. If anything, you should be happy Jack had someone he cherished; it was so rare as a pirate to find time for partners. 

Still, a little nagging voice in the back of your head whispered its miseries in your ear. 

Back aboard the Pearl, the crew filed onto the ship, still dreary and in need of more sleep. But Jack seemed anxious to leave, and everyone was used to hangovers and quick departures. Gibbs grumbled something along the lines of ‘what trouble has Jack gotten into this time?’, but nobody argued about getting underway. 

For you, it was both a blessing and a curse. While you doubted anyone had noticed your absence that morning, you were less than thrilled with the prospect of seeing Jack every day and being reminded of the feelings you desperately needed to leave behind. Then again, leaving Tortuga meant you wouldn’t have to hide from the bars in fear of more…potent reminders. 

You spent your time avoiding Jack as much as possible. Somehow, there was always a task for you to do down below when he was on deck, or rigging to climb until he was a speck far beneath you. The crow’s nest was quickly becoming your favorite spot. You could climb there and brood for a while under the pretense of watching out for the Navy—any of them—and you didn’t have to deal with concern from the crew over uncharacteristic frowning. 

But he noticed. And you noticed he noticed because his gaze wavered whenever it landed on you, and that never used to happen before. He’d stopped speaking with you, though you felt how much he wanted to. You told yourself it was for the best, but it felt wrong at the same time.

In truth, it hurt. You missed your old conversations, the easy familiarity you used to share. Your life on the Pearl just wasn’t the same without it. It was your fault, too, which stung even more, and you hated thinking that you were putting Jack through any sort of torment of his own. Your intention was never to hurt him, but you feared that was part of the result you were getting. 

As it turned out, Jack wasn’t the only one who noticed. “Why are you avoiding him so much lately?” Anamaria sidled up to you, helping you secure belaying pins. Jack wasn’t on deck, so you were more free to talk without fear of anything getting back to him.

Leave it to her to sniff things out. “I don’t know what you’re talking about.” You tried playing the comment off, but knew you failed miserably. 

“Did something happen between the two of you in Tortuga?” 

“No.”

She put a hand over yours, halting your work and forcing you to meet her gaze. “Something’s wrong, of that I’m sure. Care to enlighten me?” Seeing your hesitation, she reassured you. “I’m your friend. I’m not going to tell anyone, and I’m not going to judge you. Too much.” 

You knew from her smirk that she was joking, and it was the first time you’d had any humor around in weeks. It felt good to have that dynamic back, and you warmed to the idea of opening up, though you were a bit mortified to do so. 

“It’s just…” you began, “you know I have feelings for Jack. And I was finally coming to terms with them, but the morning we left, I realized there’s no place for them.”

“What do you mean?”

“I mean I saw Jack kissing someone else.” You stopped mid-action, the rope in your hands suffering an unfinished knot.

You didn’t need to look at her to know Anamaria was shocked. You pushed on, the silence too much for you to bear at the moment. “It makes sense: I mean, he’s been a pirate for a long time, and he’s had all these adventures and travels, and it shouldn’t come as a surprise that he met someone on one of them. I have no right to feel jealous; we were never together.”

“That doesn’t make it hurt any less.” Anamaria’s hand came to rest on your shoulder, her thumb rubbing gently over your shirt. 

You sighed. She was right, as usual. “No, it really doesn’t.”

“I’d say let’s spit in his drink, but you’ve already acknowledged it’s not that sort of situation.”

You smiled a little in spite of yourself. You continued working in silence, taking as much comfort from her company as you could. Maybe with her around, and being friends with the rest of the crew, you could dull some of your pain with their companionship. No matter how much it stung that Jack couldn’t love you, you could never be truly lonely with the rest of them by your side. 

Evening fell with a cloudless sunset, nothing to obscure the reds and yellows and pinks of the darkening sky. You stayed on deck instead of retreating somewhere else, unwilling to let your negative thoughts get the better of you. You were still alone, standing at the rail by yourself, but you weren’t lonely with the rest of the crew milling about, wisps of conversation drifting over to you. 

A presence at your side made you turn. It was Jack, staring out over the horizon, looking a little anxious. You couldn’t blame him. You knew you were the source of his discomfort, and you wanted to make up for it as best as you could, though the prospect of confessing the reasons behind your behavior scared you. He would think less of you for this, you were sure. He was too easygoing to understand why you would be so caught up on jealousy.

Jack opened his mouth to speak, but you started. “I know I’ve been distant, and I’m sorry. I didn’t mean to hurt you.” You sucked in a breath, bracing yourself for what had to come next. “I saw you in Tortuga the morning we left, you know, with that boy. He’s a handsome sort, and I’m glad for you, but I had no idea you were in any sort of relationship, and I had kind of been hoping…” you trailed off. This was hard, but you had to grit through it, because not talking to Jack again would be harder. “I had feelings for you. Have feelings. And watching you with him has kind of been eating me up alive.”

You risked a look over to Jack after a moment, waiting on a response. To your surprise, he looked shocked, and beneath that, you saw a tinge of sadness. 

“I’m sorry to overwhelm you,” you began, but Jack cut you off with a shake of his head. 

“I’m the sorry one, love. You shouldn’t have had to see that, and it gave you the completely wrong idea.”

Now it was your turn for shock, and not a little panic. “What do you mean?”

“I mean I didn’t want him to kiss me.” The sentence hung in the air before Jack continued. “It’s not that he isn’t good looking, or that I don’t know him—I do, but I don’t feel that way about him. I don’t…” Jack frowned, looking for the right word. “I don’t love him.”

“Oh.” It came out so small you weren’t sure you’d even said anything, but Jack finally managed to look you in the eye. 

“I don’t know if I deserve your affection. My flirting gets me in trouble; you got to see it first hand. And that got me in trouble with you. I’m not sure I’m worthy of commitment.”

“Oh Jack.” You raised a hand to cup the side of his face. “I don’t think you have a choice. I’ve already loved you for so long, I’m not sure I can stop.”

“Even though I deserve one of Anamaria’s beatings?”

“Even though that.”

Jack’s fingers laced themselves through yours, keeping your hand in place on his cheek. “I don’t need land to find my lover. You said it yourself: I could stay at sea forever. Because I have everything I need right here.”

*I’m aware grenadine wasn’t invented until 1872, but I needed to put something there, and idk my alcohol. 

[freyyzu]

PROMISE

All Cove wants is to see you happy, and all Baxter wants is to reassure him that he was going to do exactly that.

a/n; takes place some time during step 4 when your friends throw you another surprise party and you're off talking to someone else. i just think the two most important men in mc's life should interact a little more. implied step 3 ending on a bad note.

The twinkle of the fairy lights that hang from every wall of the first floor is mesmerizing. It's simple decoration, easy to put up, easy to get down, but beautiful all the same. The soft glow it emits puts Baxter at ease; even more so when accompanied by the sight of your smiling face.

His heart skips a beat when you glance over in his direction, your eyes meeting for the briefest moments. You discreetly wave at him, trying your best to not interrupt whatever story Terry is going on about, and he gives you a wave of his own back. He doesn't even try to fight the smile that tugs at his lips.

It was such a straightforward interaction, one that lasted all but three seconds, but just that was enough for him to feel the butterflies in his stomach lurch into a frenzy.

He's so enthralled by you, in fact, that he doesn't even notice the sound of someone making their way closer to him until they're already speaking.

"Uhm, how... how are you enjoying the party?" It's an expected question coming from an unexpected source.

Baxter turns to face the new presence by his side, more than a little surprised. Out of all the people here, Cove Holden would be the last person he expected to initiate a conversation, but the appearance isn't unwelcomed. Far from it.

"It's been fun," he says with full sincerity.

Despite the sparse decorations and only handful of people here, Baxter would say with his full heart that this is the best party he's ever been to. Surrounded by people who really care for him, those who took the time out of their day to surprise him even after all the stunts he's pulled. "Thank you for your part in this. I deeply appreciate it."

"Oh," Cove sputters, apparently flustered by the earnestness. "It's no problem. I'm... glad you're enjoying yourself."

Baxter smiles knowingly, "is there something on your mind?"

The taller male doesn't answer, but he fixes his gaze on a particular person across the room, still intently listening to Terry's story. Miranda and Xavier have joined them by this point.

'Ah.' his expression softens. "Are you worried about them?"

"Of course I am," he replies. Any hesitation in his voice from before lost within those four words. His hands clench and loosen by his sides a few times and he glances down at his feet, as if debating whether or not it was okay to say the next words.

You had forgiven Baxter a long time ago, that was a fact, but Cove couldn't forget your dejected expression or how many false smiles you wore to assure everyone you weren't hurt that summer.

Baxter waits quietly. He doesn't know exactly what your best friend intends to say, but from his fidgeting alone, he could garner a guess. Eventually though, he does break the silence. "I won't hurt them."

Cove looks over to your boyfriend, unable to keep the doubt from his expression. He trusts you, he wants you to be happy, that's all he ever wants for you; but that's even more of a reason for him to be wary. Baxter had broken your heart once, and he never wants to see that happen again.

"Can you promise that?"

There's a pause, and then a shake of a head from the black color haired man and Cove feels his heart nearly sink. "I'm not like you. I haven't known them my entire life. I'm just someone who showed up to the doorstep of your neighborhood one summer and then left."

There's a gleam in his brown eyes that make them seem to sparkle even more than the lights decorated around the room. "We'll have arguments, we'll get into fights," his voice lowers, "but I hope I can learn from those mistakes. That I'll make a better decision the next time." He turns to face Cove. "I can promise that."

Cove swallows the lump in his throat. He had come here to talk to Baxter, but in the end he ended up not being able to say anything at all. Though, maybe that was okay too. Whatever the lead up was, he heard what he needed to hear.

"Thank you," he says.

Baxter's face lights up at those words, eyes widening with boyish glee, before reverting back to his more well-known smirk. "No, thank you for coming over and chatting with me. I'm thankful we got to have this time together."

"Aha," Cove chuckles awkwardly now that the air has cleared. "But uh, Baxter?" He calls, wanting to get just one last word in.

"Yes?"

"You... should take care of yourself, too." And with that final statement, he steps forward to join your group.

Baxter blinks once.

He takes a moment to reign in his shock. Did Cove Holden of all people just give him some encouragement? He chuckles, straightening up as he spots you splitting from the circle to make your way over to his side.

This week has been full of surprises.

[otomes-and-tears]

i am also glad that you’re a shiloh analysis scholar <333 too many people hate the funniest (and saddest) parts of him!! what do you think of shiloh’s relationship with bae, pran and/or lizzie? i’d like to think he’s being genuine on some level when it comes to liking/disliking them but you never know with that snake :((((

Speculating on Shiloh's true opinions on people is basically as hard as speculating on anything else about him. But I'm here to be delusional so let me put my tinfoil hat on! I'll probably make a full post on him and Elizabeth later because I have a lot of thoughts on that and want some screenshots to accompany them. I'll start with the easiest one: I think he genuinely dislikes Pran, but kind of plays it up. Pran isn't exactly the easiest person to get along with. He isn't popular, so I don't think Shiloh will get any flack for talking shit about him from anyone he thinks matters. Hence, it's the reason why he allows himself to be a hater for once and actually say what he thinks, but he also has an incentive to play up his dislike of him. In Our Life, you can see kid Shiloh kind of identifying Cove as the kid on the bottom of the food chain and making efforts to keep him there, both by altering his behaviour to ensure that he's solidly in Lizzie's good graces (who he sees as a leader) and not making much of an effort do endear Cove to him. I feel like his behaviour towards Pran is much like his childish attempts to social climb-- by playing up his dislike towards Pran, someone he knows doesn't have an interest in the school's social hierarchy and is uninterested in fighting back, he can push him down to appear as someone with a higher standing. I also think that on Pran's route, Shiloh is trying to be a homewrecker AUSHAUS He flirts with JB a lot and is the one most opposed to her and Pran's relationship, even going as far as to continue doing her favours to try and win her over-- and basically, the main reason Shiloh is even interested in JB in the first place is that she's the only girl in the Jerksquad and the person all of them are interested in, at least to some degree. He's so focused on the way he's perceived he'll go to these lengths to get one over people he dislikes. But Shiloh's distaste is also quite natural, I think. The game establishes numerous times that Pran and Shiloh are polar opposites in every conceivable way: Shiloh is bubbly, extroverted and talkative while Pran is quiet, uninvolved and introverted. Pran's backstory is rooted in severe neglect and being so conflict-averse that he'd do anything to try to please both his grandparents and his parents, who were often on opposite sides, only to end up pleasing no one. Later in life, he adopts his contrarian attitude because he simply sees no point in making an effort if it's going to be futile anyway. Shiloh, however, is the complete opposite of that: He lies and manipulates others for his own benefit, he thrives on the attention from others. He feigns concern about them when he actually doesn't care at all. Pran is frustrating to him because he's so fundamentally disinterested in whatever Shiloh can offer him that he's unmanipulatable. It's one, tiny way that Shiloh isn't in control.

Regarding Bae, I don't know if Shiloh likes having him around, but he can certainly benefit from him. And Bae is a predictable enough person that he finds a lot of comfort in their dynamic! Bae is rich, he doesn't have any friends in school-- and isn't interested in connecting with anyone, so isn't someone likely to spread any rumours about Shiloh. Bae wants to be perceived as someone mature and oh so above all the other high schoolers he's surrounded by, so it's a very simple desire to cater to, and he's a lazy wimp that's fairly easy to locate after-hours. Get on his good graces and you might get some help with academics, and he can spin becoming roommates with Bae as an act of kindness on his part, so he can appear to be a magnanimous, patient guy.

I like to think that he grows to, at the very least, genuinely look forward to spending time with him after they spend enough time together. Their Karaoke scenes are so cute I want to believe that at least part of him isn't pretending to have fun in them...

[luverofralts]

Arkhelios Adventures

"I'm so glad that you could meet with me today. I've been looking forward to getting to know you better."

Ewan G Maricourt calmly sat beside the son he had just recently been informed was his. Ewan MacLeod had reluctantly accepted a quick visit with his father, even though magic still made him uneasy. Magic appeared to be everything to his father, though, so a relationship with him likely meant a relationship with some degree of magic.

If a relationship was even what he wanted from his father. Most days, Ewan wasn't sure. His half-siblings looked happy enough with him in their lives, but they also were magic users. Ewan was decidedly not interested in magic, nor was he aware that he even had the potential to cast magic.

"You have plenty of potential if you did want to study here," Ewan Maricourt announced, like he'd been somehow reading his son's mind. "Your tuition could even be covered as my son. That is if your mother agrees. Have you had any discussions with her about our...connection? Truthfully, I don't remember much about her magical inclinations. Our relationship was brief."

Brief? The younger Ewan was surprised that his father could even remember his mother. From what she said, their "relationship" was nothing more than a few ill-advised hookups.

"I don't think she has any interest in magic. She always says that you can't trust a warlock. That his first allegiance is to himself and then his coven and then finally to those who love him. I don't think I can even do magic if she wanted me to."

"My own mothers were hard on me," Ewan Sr scoffed. "They pushed me to greatness because they knew that I had the potential. Both of my great-grandfathers were kings, and my- our lineage is filled with great warlocks and witches. We descend from the main Maricourt lineage. Not the 'preferred' lineage our queen comes from, but a powerful one nonetheless."

"So you're saying that I might be able to do magic like your kids because of my ancestors?"

"You are my kid," Ewan Sr corrected. "But yes, magical power is generally passed in the blood. It's what makes the study of blood magic dangerous. At the same time though, magic exists everywhere, in every person. If you can find a way to connect to magic on a personal level, anyone can perform it. Several students here come to us from non magical families. They can take what they've learned to those families and maybe help them find a connection of their own. We all have both life and death in us, we are all their subjects. Bloodlines do tend to foster greater magical strength, though; there is no denying that."

"Devard, I'm busy. Go hit on someone else, I have an exam to study for."

Remy pushed Devard Auvrey away from her, rejecting his advances. Devard respectfully backed off, but still voiced his objection.

"You said today you were free to hook up," he protested. "Emily's gone on a study assignment."

"Ew, are you still sleeping with her?" Remy scoffed. "She's boring. Plus, she's bad at magic. She's practically got my grade average, and I work very hard to score so low. Stupidity comes naturally to her."

"You sound jealous," Devard laughed, making Remy fume beside him. He had met Remy the first year of their studies, but she had only started giving him the time of day recently, presumably because she was trying to make her girlfriend jealous. He was the son of a famous actress and a descendant of the king of Crystal Cove, making him far better a catch than the daughter of a Strangetown cult reject and a man barely holding onto power. Remy never saw it like that, of course. In Remy's eyes, she was practically the equal of the queen of Pleasantview.

"I am not jealous of Emily," the witch fumed. "If I wasn't going to fail this exam, I would prove it to you. If I fail this exam, Dad might keep me back a year. Can you imagine the indignity of repeating a year while my siblings all make fun of me? Elowen would never let me live it down and Theo? He'd be insufferable."

"Maybe work less hard at keeping your grades low," Devard teased. "You're overachieving at being a failure."

"Yeah, yeah. I can't suddenly miraculously get better to pass just this exam without giving the game away. It's a balance of lies that sells it."

Evren stood at the door of the magical academy, trying to settle on an approach to take with his stepson. Parenting was a hard job, and parenting a young demon hybrid who was studying blood magic seemed to be nearly impossible. The problem with raising Theo with three non-magical parents was being the only parent who could understand his use of spells. There was one spell Theo had used recently that Evren didn't know how to react to.

For months now, Evren had been charming Theo's day planner and workbook with the basic spell for birth control. On top of that spell, he had placed a ward that would send him a signal when it had been cast. Well, the day had finally come and the ward had been triggered, warning him that his young stepson was sexually active.

Telling Theo's biological parents was out of the question. Roman might just die of fear and never leave his bed, while Abe might backslide in his parenting and scream at his son for making poor decisions.

Adrian usually sided with Roman, but was fiercely protective of Theo. If Evren knew his partner, Adrian would launch himself at the Darktides, using his own political power to undermine Edana's duke husband, while Edana presumably got Theo expelled from school. There wasn't a single scenario where Theo's parents reacted in a sane, rational or mature way.

Which meant that it was entirely up to Evren to be the mature, responsible parent. It also meant that Evren had to be the mature magic user where Theo's parents couldn't. He hadn't placed a ward on the spell for curiosity or to punish Theo. Theo would probably see it that way if he found out, but Evren had other motivations.

He told Theo every time they crossed paths at the school to be careful with his magic. The hybrid had already attached himself to a powerful family while also casting blood magic, unaware that that same attachment needed to be compensated for. Every teacher had been instructed by Evren to remind Theo of this fact, and to limit any blood magic homework that Theo would be tempted to finish with his boyfriend. As hard as Evren tried to show Theo where the acceptable limits for blood magic were, the more Theo seemed to ignore him. The boy was cocky and seemed to think he knew everything, just like any other teenager.

Blood magic was primal. It didn't limit itself to spells and wards. It was a consuming power that invaded the entirety of a warlock or demon's life. Ritual feasts, the act of killing or dying, and sex and childbirth all took a toll on the caster, feeding and growing their power without conscious thought. Evren was pretty sure Theo wasn't about to go on a murder spree or hold ritualized feasts, but sex was an entirely plausible thing to worry about and Evren knew better than to assume that Theo had taken this under consideration before jumping into bed with someone he was dangerously bonded to.

As soon as the ward had triggered, Evren had spent every moment he could get thinking about this problem and how to keep Theo safe without Roman either hospitalized or demanding Evren's head on a platter for keeping this fact to himself. His only help had been Adam's father, who had grasped the problem immediately and without causing a scene. Both men decided to test the connection between the two boys discreetly before moving forward. There was at least a chance that their sons were using magic responsibly and a test would prove it. Edana was also conveniently at a royal event in Twikkii Island with her husband, so if nothing happened, she would never know that a test had taken place. Ewan made sure that he would be close by in case something happened. His visit with his son had been strategically planned so he could keep a discreet eye on the demon hybrid.

"Evren! You're visiting today! Did you come with an assignment for me?"

Despina ran to Evren and engulfed him in a hug. Evren hugged her back, happy to see at least one teenager he didn't have to worry about.

"No assignments," Evren laughed. "Trust me, you'll get more than enough here without me adding more. It's great to see that you have a passion for magic; never lose that sense of wonderment and your homework will be the most interesting part of your life here."

"Can you point me in the direction of Theo?" he asked.

Despina pointed down the hall where the sound of Theo's laughter echoed off the walls. Evren sighed. Whatever he was doing, it certainly didn't sound like schoolwork. Maybe Evren didn't have to rush to assess the condition of Theo and Adam's connection if they were both goofing off instead of studying.

When Evren made it down the hall, he could see Adam hunched over a large crystal, furiously muttering commands that clearly weren't working. Theo had one hand holding his notebook, and the other watching something on his phone.

"Hi, Evren!"

Theo looked up from his "spellwork" to see his step-father watching him intently. In an instant, the phone vanished into Theo's pocket.

"Theo, Adam. How are you two?" Evren asked cautiously. He didn't want to interrupt them if they were in the middle of a spell. Considering that he was there to judge their bond in the first place, interrupting them might lead to an incident, and Evren very much wanted to avoid an incident if he could.

"Fine," Theo answered. "A bit cold, but I guess someone opened the main hall window or something. Why are you here? Is something happening?"

It was somewhat common to see Evren come and go at the school while he completed official coven business, but judging from the stern look on his face, he was here for another reason.

"I'm fine too," Adam added, jumping in before Evren could speak. "We were assigned this crystal as a class project, not that Theo's been much help. I've gotten it to glow, but it's supposed to release a special kind if energy under the right circumstance."

"Of course I've been helping," Theo snapped irritably. "It's just a dumb rock. It's never going to do anything other than glow."

Evren froze, looking at the large crystal that Adam was working with. The boy had an affinity for crystals and could likely extract the correct energy in an hour or two given the chance. He was truly talented.

But that was what was dangerous. Whoever had assigned Theo and Adam this project was either not paying attention or was purposely trying to trigger something dangerous. Once Adam extracted the energy from the stone, Theo's natural pull towards that energy could land them in serious trouble. It was a good thing that Evren had arrived when he did. It looked like the faculty at this school listened to Evren's warnings in the exact same way that Theo did.

"Hmm, what about a new approach?" Evren suggested, trying to suppress his worry, but seeing an opportunity. "Theo, why don't you summon some small amount of energy and then get Adam to amplify it with his own. Sometimes, adding existing energy to crystals can awaken the energy inside."

And it will be the perfect test to see how the two of you function together within the bond you share.

Nothing about this test was dangerous. It was a simple task that even child witches could perform. Master Ewan had given his consent for this test along with several others and would be able to back up Evren should anything go wrong.

"Alright, that makes sense."

Theo extended his arm, calling a small ball of energy into existence. Beside him, Adam left the crystal and cupped Theo's hand with his own.

Within seconds, the ball had doubled in size and intensity. Evren felt his body relax despite his worries. The two of them were perfectly balanced, each of them maintaining a harmonious pull on the energy at all times. There was very little left distinguishing Adam's energy from Theo's. The two were wrapped around the other's magic so completely, it was hard to imagine them eventually separating into two different people. They had been friends since the age of six, recent lovers and partners in their magical studies. They were inseparable, both physically and magically.

"Theo, it's starting to hurt," Adam muttered softly, hoping that Evren wouldn't hear. "Theo, let go."

Adam tried jerking his hand away from Theo's, but it wouldn't move. The light was intensifying, growing more and more powerful with every second. Theo didn't respond to him. He kept their hands locked together, unable to move.

"Theo, stop! You're hurting my hands!"

Adam shouted at his boyfriend, despite wanting to keep his failure to maintain the spell a secret. His hand was burning now, and pain inflamed the nerves that ran down his arm. He was on fire, burning from the inside out.

Beside him, Theo was pulled into his dark form, only adding to the power in the room.

Brilliant light engulfed the school, suffocating the land with an unnatural brightness that was only getting stronger.

Evren stared at the sparkling light filling the room with curiosity. He had read Theo's school file a long time ago, when he had started dating Adrian. Theo had been just as much Adrian's child as his own biological girls, and Adrian had made sure that Evren understood this fact before dating him. In order to understand how to guide Theo in his magical journey, Evren had memorized everything in that file. He understood the basics of Theo's abilities and tried his best to explain them to Roman, Abe and Adrian. He was often Theo's advocate when his parents didn't understand how the magical world functioned.

This light show had been one of the first expressions of Theo's abilities. Abe had described the magic to him exactly like this. This blinding light, the eerie glow that hung in the air was demonic magic in its purest form. He had read papers that suggested that this magic often appeared in infant demons because they were newly born and still had some magic of the Life deity left in them from birth. After they experienced the cold of the Void and fed on energy for the first time, they lost the ability to access this type of magic.

How the hell was Theo still accessing Life’s magic? Demons first began as fallen servants of Life, but most of them never retained any of its power, except maybe the smallest spell of an infant. Whatever this was, Evren had not expected anything like it. At most, he had figured that maybe he'd have to sit the two teens down and shout at them to be more careful with their magic now that sex was a factor changing their connection. This? Ewan was not going to be happy about this. Evren shuddered just thinking about trying to break this news to Roman.

Sorry, Roman. Your son is sleeping with his boyfriend and that's making his magic so unstable that he's apparently doing impossible magic. I'm the one who decided to test him without asking you first because I knew that you'd blow up or self-destruct if I did.

"Theo, stop! It's hurting me!" Adam shouted again, trying to pull his arms away from his boyfriend but failing.

"I don't know how to stop," Theo whimpered. "I can't move. I'm trying to let go, it's just-"

Adam screamed as bright lines ravaged his body, taking over the visible skin and raising long welts across his face. Theo could feel the pain Adam felt just as strongly as he knew that this was all his fault. He'd messed up again and now Adam was in danger, all because he had trusted Theo.

"Adam! I'm sorry, i don't know how to stop this," Theo sobbed. "Tell me how to stop this! Evren, help!"

The familiar crackle of the Void rang through the air, illuminating whatever it touched in violent pink light. An unbearable coldness whipped around the school windows, trying as hard as it could to unite with Theo and the energy he was unleashing.

Theo's eyes were wide and terrified as he watched Adam fall to his feet, still unable to separate his and Theo's hands, screaming in agony.

"Adam, I can't let go! Please help me," Theo pleaded desperately. Adam's eyes rolled back into his head as he lost consciousness, still clinging to Theo against his will.

Evren already had his wand out at the ready. There were spells to disarm situations like this, but with a bonded pair and demonic Life magic in the mix, it was imperative that he chose the right spell. The wrong spell might only make the situation worse.

"Evren!" Ewan was already drawing power to himself, his own wand glowing dangerously. "Demonic exorcism level one. Start it now! I'll protect my son while you disarm Theo."

Evren frowned, but raised his wand as instructed. Exorcism was reserved for full demons usually, but the power radiating from Theo certaintly felt like it was comparable to a full demon. Exorcism usually returned a demon to the Void without the energy to return though. The last thing Evren wanted to do was banish his stepson to a realm he wasn't fully able to function in. He could see Ewan's plan, though. A level one exorcism started with draining demonic energy to weaken the demon enough to banish it to the Void. Draining just enough demonic magic might weaken Theo's grip on Adam enough to separate them. It would also seal the creeping expansion of the Void. Exorcism wasn't the first choice Evren would have gone with, but it was a solid plan.

"Theo, close your eyes!"

[sugar-omi]

okay first of all dw i get you, like ive had intentions to talk to ppl but then im like ",,,nah" LIKE I DONT WANNA TALK ABT FINDING A JOB OR SMTH LIKE IM JUST CHECKING YOU'RE ALIVE GO AWAY<////3

its times like that ik why i got 99-100% introvert on my mbti test

also YES LISTEN I'LL TELL YOU HOW I DID IT BC THIS IS HOW I DO EVEYRTHING, I JUST IMAGINE EVERYTHING A SLIKE A FUCKING COMING OF AGE MOVIE BC THATS THE LIFE IM LIVING IN MY HEAD RIGHT LMAO

i also use a lotta metaphors n say very poetic shit i just,,, the writer is deep and it is a little demon controlling me

MOVING ON OMG WHY AM I ALL OVER THE PLACE

i'm getting so many ideas... maybe lee asking if aloma is, well aloma, and crying bc she missed her so much and it was so scary, so hard for her to just be gone

i imagine its not too long before aloma comes out, seeing the pained expression of her family when they think people aren't looking isn't hard to miss, especially when you keep watching everyone because you've missed them.

ALSO I HAD A FEELING ABT THE SCAR OMG IM GLAD I WAS RIGHT

the family and cove would be so upset, they'd cry harder knowing they weren't there to protect or help aloma. everyone hates they didn't notice sooner, didn't do something sooner so aloma never ran away in the first place.

oh i also imagine the only reason the moms haven't noticed sooner is because they're just going through the motions most days, they all are actually

when i'm upset i kinda have like tunnel vision the whole day/week, even someone i was talking to a moment ago i won't remember exactly what we talked about. or their face/features.

i purposefully avoid making eye contact anyway, but more so during this time bc its hard. so aloma looks so much like their aloma, its hard to look sometimes. always glancing away, or not looking in the first place.

or everything is moving so fast, they're trying to escape thee conversation or situation as fast as possible and they don't take the time to study aloma's face, don't notice even the obvious things because today was too rough.

cove probably wouldn't think too much of the way aloma reacts to the shop either. mm unless aloma went smth like, "it'd be nice if there was a magician around here. those are fun, dont you think cove?"

he'd be a bit curious, but he'd be so hurt at the memory from shopping w her during step 1 he might not think about it until he's trying to sleep at night.

!!! another thought, cove probably thinks that baxter is aloma's boyfriend

never says anything bc, she's just a tourist, that's inappropriate.

but after crying in each others arms, having a heart to heart and breaking through the layer of hurt and regret, cove would ask either then or later on in the morning bc "wait, aren't you dating baxter?"

and aloma is like "ew what're you talking about? we're like siblings"

aloma and baxter would be so close, like maybe holding hands or hugging a lot, just very affectionate and joking a lot. cove isn't use to seeing sibling dynamics like that, or friends like that. ofc terry and randy are silly in their own right, but i think seeing how close aloma is with baxter makes cove yearn.

he wants to know everything about her, and when baxter and arden catch him outside, having just came back from their own lunch date and they invite cove in.

small talk and awkward silence later, cove mumbles, so soft it wouldn't be heard if it wasn't for the silence of baxter's condo.

"please, tell me everything i missed..."

wants to know all the things aloma won't tell him. of course not the sad or personal stories, but the embarrassing ones. or the little habits she adapted. the things that made her laugh, her favorite flower or food.

some things, arden and baxter tell him to ask her himself, but they do say "be careful, please take care of her. she's yearned for sunset bird and it's people for a long time."

of course they don't say anything she wouldn't like, they'll say some classic protective and teasing (big) sibling things, but otherwise usher cove out the door where he runs into aloma who is surprised, but laughs it off and says "what a coincidence, i was just uh.. i was just going to see you." aloma laughs, rubbing her cheek or some other nervous tick cove takes notice of. "wanna.. go see something cool?"

and takes cove to that field of poppies in "happiness" where they smile and laugh and cry.

cove, tucking hair behind aloma's ear. "i wanna know everything about you" "... it's not all pretty." "maybe, but its you."

and she tells him about the beginning, how opal took her in and tried to convince her things aren't as bad as they seem, that now is better than never but of course it didn't work, and she would never push a child out of her home.

and she tells him the in betweens, the funny and the stupid, the chaotic and the hurt/comfort stories. tells him the little things in between those, down to her 2 neighbors favorite colors and how arden toppled everyone over, her and tama trying to follow qiu's moves

told him about the hushed conversations she had under the stars, about the secrets shared in the dark between her and arden as children. not the personal ones, but the ones where they had a crush on some kid with red hair or called a teacher mom, the little ones but big enough to make a 13+ year old crumble in embarrassment

and they laugh, they laugh until they cry and choke and then they cry. well, cove cries mostly.

aloma looks up at the stars, white poppies framing her head and she's laughing, smiling and waving her hands to animate the story and cove flips over, trying to wipe away the tears slowly slipping down.

"cove? what's wrong...?" aloma touches his back, hesitant. cove reaches around, holding her hand.

"i just.. wanna experience those things with you too." cove cries, shaking "im jealous. i know i shouldnt be but..."

aloma is silent, and cove almost apologies but silently, brought to him by the breeze. "we're doing that now aren't we?"

and cove turns around, shocked, but he searches aloma's glassy eyes and then he cries, nodding. and he holds her hand tighter, tangling their fingers together for comfort

imagine the 'indifference route' was a bad dream crush/love Mc was having one night and when they tell Cove about it he is equally crept out and unsettled by the idea that there could've been a reality where they weren't as close as they are now. Where they didn't even *try* to be closer.

and when he learns that the indifferent version of him never even came over the day Mc learned about their biological parents, and weren't there to listen and comfort them, I think that would shock him the most. That this version of him wasn't there for the love of his life in moments like this.

one of the things that keep me up at night ever since I played and regretted the indifferent route. Never again.

omg he'd cry

he'd even apologize

he can't imagine not being apart of your life, he loves you so much. if you're dating he's ruined but if you're still crushing he'd even more ruined

which you'd think it'd be the other way but it's not, although you prbly couldn't tell the difference much but trust me, his heart hurts double. the idea of not being interest in you hurts more especially when he hasn't told you how he feels.

if there's a world, even in a dream, where you aren't interest in each others lives in any way, then there could be a world where he pines after you while you have no interest in him at all

cove can't imagine not loving you at all, so the idea of your disinterested, especially if it's direct and he can see the visible distance-or worst, annoyance- in your gaze

would end up confessing bc he can't let smth like that happen. if it's in step 3 before the end of summer/ happiness moment. he's even more upset bc he's alrdy worried abt the future n you losing touch

if you're dating he'd prbly cry m ask you to marry him bc he can't live like that, is joking abt it when he says it but does want it (if you want it too ofc)

either way what's you to know he wants you, loves you, and at this point Needs to be in your life bc he needs you like water

[malfoys-demigod]

Turn Me or Leave Me 2/2

1/2

Summary: Elijah makes his choice to find and return you to him with the help of Marcel.

A/N: It was really nice to see that people wanted a second part. This one's shorter but I hope you still enjoy it!

Word Count: 1.8k

Tagging: @puddinmistahj-blog @moon-child-writer @wanniiieeee @agent-anna @mysticalfallsss

“All I wanted was a happy ending. A happy ending to what I have caused on our special day.” Elijah said, expressing his guilt on a sunny morning. A day after the evening of when he learned that you, the love of his life, had chosen to leave, and adding to the misery, asked that your memories were to be erased. Every last one memory he and you shared for the past five years.

Marcel and Klaus, being his only two anchors who felt responsible to hold the honorable and noble Mikaelson standing, stood behind the still-sad Elijah, listening to him sulk around the compound.

Marcel felt highly accountable for putting Elijah in greater pain, confiding in him the truth that came along with nothing but distress. He also felt sorry that he had to tell them something that made you unsure of telling Marcel in the first place, despite not telling them exactly where you were headed… yet.

The right hand of Klaus had sighed, looking at the ground, getting Elijah to turn around and look at him with focus.

“I’ll have you know Marcellus that I completely feel regret in myself for giving her the choice to leave. I shouldn’t have referred to her as a wall when it came to discussing important matters as that. I feel entirely in the wrong as she was right in making that point of no difference between now or five years for me to turn her. I vowed that I’d do anything to make her happy and I denied a simple request that I could have given in a heartbeat. I am clearly spiraling down a whole of great depression and fear, on the brink of turning my humanity off knowing that I cannot attempt to get her back. Is that what you wanted out of me?” he asked, irritated and drained.

Marcel looked at Klaus, who seemed to have shrugged, signaling that this was not his floor for him to say anything since he wasn’t the one to have gotten Elijah’s attention. He then looked back at Elijah, who was breathing heavily from what he had just told Marcel.

“I’m sorry, Elijah, you must have misunderstood me,” Marcel stated, “You see, I wanted to honor the moment Y/N and I had together that night in the airport. In order for her to tell me where she was going, I told her that there was no use in feeling hesitant to tell me since there was an assumption that you’d back off and respect her wishes of leaving, staying here instead. I shouldn’t have done that now that I’m hoping you’d sweep her off her feet again and get her back. Before you snap my neck or anything, just know that I’m on your side now, I want you to get her back.”

Elijah used his super-speed to quickly appear in front of Marcel, looking at him with serious eyes, “Then kindly tell me where she is. I’d like to get my wife back.”

Marcel patted Elijah in the back, smirking with delight, “With pleasure, but there’s someone you should know with her over there who’ll be brought back as well.”

Elijah’s face turned to stone, as his excitement was abruptly brought to a pause. “Who?” he asked with worry.

--

“I’m so glad we could end today’s shopping at this wonderful restaurant’s seating choice, Rebekah.” you thanked your newly made friend.

The two of you were currently at Duke’s La Jolla, a Hawaiian-inspired restaurant known for its beautiful outdoor seatings, overlooking the ocean views San Diego had to offer. This was near La Jolla Cove, a place Rebekah had planned on taking you to see after.

Right now, Duke’s was the place to gather energy and restore appetite after today’s massive shopping care of Rebekah at The Shops, an unparalleled experience for shopping at the city. She surprisingly took care of all the expenses, managing you to not stress about the endless rolling of receipts. She said it was another warm way of welcoming you to the city.

“Of course, dear, Y/N,” Rebekah waved off, “I’ve befriended the chef quite some time ago and got us the best seats for today. He’s remarkably a talented chef I might say as our meals are on the house.”

You gasped at the fact that meals were also taken cared of, “First the shopping, now the meals? This clearly has to be a dream, Rebekah, I’m serious, nobody could be that lucky in one day.”

“I can assure you that the chef of Duke’s has his ways of welcoming newcomers to his city and giving out free meals on your first visit is one of his many ways,” said an masculine voice, interrupting the conversation.

You looked up to see an elegant and sophisticated man, wearing a black luxurious suit, smiling at you with such captivation in his eyes. He removed one of his hands that had been hiding in his pocket, lending it out for you to shake.

“I’m Elijah, Rebekah’s brother,” the man introduced himself to you.

You took out your hand, shaking it with a small, enchanted smile on your face as you were charmed by his presence, “It’s nice to meet you, Elijah, I’m Y/N.”

Elijah felt nothing but pure attractiveness in how refreshing you looked compared to how he saw you last time. He was feeling nervous but wonderful to see you as you felt and appeared so different.

He examined how different you looked in terms of fashion. Rebekah transformed you into this fresh West Coast beach girl, successfully rocking the sundress and denim jacket as your hair was flowing down in a wavy manner. Your smile, it really showed that you were compelled. You had no thoughts of the troubling life you had in New Orleans, especially during the last time you interacted with Elijah. You seemed to have had no thought on the supernatural events happening, as there was nothing but sunshine on your mind.

Marcel seemed to have noticed that Elijah was about to start fawning over you for a much longer time than he had expected, which caused him to nudge Elijah in the shoulder, bringing him back to reality.

Elijah, animated back to reality, turned to Marcel, who was smiling warmly at you, “This is Marcel, a friend of mine.”

“He’s also my boyfriend actually,” Rebekah stated, smiling at you and Elijah. Marcel extended his hand and chuckled at you, “It’s a pleasure to meet you, Y/N.”

You shook Marcel’s hand, gasping again at Rebekah, “Rebekah I didn’t even know about you having a brother, and now a boyfriend? You seem to be hiding lots of things from me,” you teased.

“Relax darling, I’ve only met you a few days ago, I can’t just talk you through my entire life,” Rebekah sarcastically replied, “No doubt that would take centuries,” she looked at Elijah with a smirk.

“Right, well I wouldn’t want to be rude anymore, Elijah, Marcel, would you like to join us? The view is to die for, and so is the food!” you proposed, inviting your two new friends to sit with you by the table.

Rebekah waved her hands at Elijah and Marcel who had begun nodding and gesturing to sit, “But would you look at the time? Y/N was meaning to be taken to La Jolla Cove and now seems to be the perfect time.”

You turned to Rebekah, narrowing your eyebrows in confusion. But before you had a say in it, Elijah took a step forward and pointed at his sister, “Yes well, perhaps you’ve forgotten that you and Marcel have matters to attend to by this hour, sister? Y/N shouldn’t be worried about cancelled plans on her end, I’d be delighted to take her for you, if that's alright with you, Y/N?” he asked, now looking at you.

You rapidly nodded in excitement, “Of course, I don’t see why not!”

Marcel clasped his hands together, rubbing it in successfully, “Well now that’s settled, I think it’s time to make a move now,” he offered, looking at the group with a big grin on his face. Rebekah pursed her lips in irritation, “Right, just fantastic…” she murmured, standing up and making her way beside Marcel.

Elijah took his hand out gracefully, which you took in response, standing up beside him with an elated smile on your face. “Well, thank you for lunch today, Rebekah, and of course shopping. I’ll see you at home later?”

“With good things to look forward to I hope,” Rebekah strangely replied, which somehow Elijah and Marcel knew what she meant, leaving Marcel and Rebekah to part ways after that, resulting in you and Elijah left alone again.

He looked at you with mesmerism for a quick second and then gestured his hand to the exit, “Shall we?”

--

Plans with the person taking you to La Jolla Cove may have been changed but something about Elijah taking you instead didn’t really bother you. He was nothing but a pleasure to be with at the moment. After multiple times of offering that you drive, you finally gave up when Elijah strongly insisted that he’d take the wheel and drive the two of you to your destination.

For some reason, the drive to the cove had been surprisingly quiet in a good way. Glances at each other were exchanged every so often, smiling at each other as if you two were an old and sweet married couple enjoying each other’s moments together.

While you were thinking about how kind and handsome your friend’s brother was, Elijah was feeling nothing but a breeze of happiness in his heart, seeing you smile as if nothing in the world was bothering you at the moment. He was a little sad that you weren’t aware anymore of the feud between you two, but he wanted to cherish this happy and silent moment the two of you were sharing, knowing it would come to an end later on as he intended of bringing your memories back.

Once you arrived at the cove, you quickly stepped out and breathed the fresh and sunny air in the small, picturesque cove and beach that was surrounded by cliffs. “Wow, I can see why this place is deeply loved by both tourists and locals.” you admitted, gazing at the waves and breathtaking sky.

You turned around, looking at Elijah, who seemed to have already made his way beside you, putting his hands back on his pocket. You noticed how elegantly perfect he looked in his suit, but it didn’t really suit the setting. “Can I be honest with you, Elijah?” you asked, getting his attention.

He gave a small smile and nod, gesturing for you to continue, “Of course.”

“No offense because I really like your whole get up and all but wearing a nice suit… on a beach?” you joked, laughing at what you said.

Elijah looked down at his whole look, grinning at your observation and started unbuttoning his jacket, “Yes, I suppose you’re right. I do hope though that folding up my shirt and trousers would suffice at the moment.”

“We could head back to the mall and get you some beach clothes if you want,” you offered, turning around to the car.

Elijah shook his head, and stopped you by grabbing your forearm, “That won’t be necessary, Y/N, I wouldn’t want you to miss out on spending more time in this lovely place.”

You nodded, showing a gesture of appreciation and looked back at the view of the beach, “It’s beautiful isn’t it? I’ve never seen such magnificent views like this. You see, I’m originally from New Orleans and I just moved here to the West Coast and I haven’t really had much exposure to things like this.”

Elijah, finished folding his shirt and trousers, looked at you with care, “Do you like it here so far?”

You nodded, showing eyes of hopes and dreams awaiting to be accomplished, “You bet. I don’t really see myself going back to New Orleans. I can’t explain how I’m feeling exactly but this place makes me feel free and at ease. Like nothing’s stopping me to live a carefree and happy life.”

Elijah displayed somewhat of a small smile, which to him was because he was relieved and happy that you were happy. The smile was small because he also felt unhappy that he was not able to provide you this happiness.

“What about you, Elijah?”

“Hm?” Elijah hummed in confusion.

“Are you living a carefree and happy life as well?” you prompted, asking innocently. “Perhaps there’s a special person in your life that’s giving you the additional happiness in your life?” There was something in your gut that wanted you to ask this, wanting to know if he had a significant other in his life.

Elijah chuckled to himself in a depressing way, looking down at the ground. “It’s quite a long story.”

“Ah,” you opened your mouth, happy that you understood what he was trying to say, “But do you love her?”

There seemed to be a quick and honest nod from Elijah, who seemed to be looking directly at the horizon, as if he was vividly thinking about his girl. “Words cannot express how much I love her.”

“So what happened?” you genuinely asked.

“One single yet vast mistake I made on my end. It ruined everything that we had together and I will never forget how much I regretted everything that led to her completely starting a new life without me. It broke my heart but I deserved that. She doesn’t deserve to have her heart broken because I wasn’t thinking things correctly.” he utterly confessed with grief.

You touched his shoulder out of pity, causing him to look at you with soft eyes, “Fight for her, Elijah. She has to be around here somewhere, hasn’t she? It isn’t too late to see if you have a chance to get her back and I know you will. I can help find her!” you supportingly said, trying to get his hopes up.

But it somehow failed. He sighed, shaking his head at you. His hand slowly touched yours, the one that held his shoulder. “Looking around for her won’t be necessary,” he replied, confusing you, “Because you’ve been standing alongside me today.”

You narrowed your eyes, wondering what he meant as this sounded strange to you. “I-I don’t follow, Elijah.”

Elijah placed both his hands on your shoulders firmly, looking you straight in the eye as he started compelling you.

“What we have just briefly discussed between us is considered a highlight of what I’m about to bring back to you,” he first said, “Recently, Marcel Gerard had compelled you to forget everything that happened to you in the last five years upon your request. The reason for this was because I denied you of becoming a vampire after being asked by you on our five year anniversary. With this, we had a massive quarrel, leaving you to have your memories erased and decide to start a new life here, away from New Orleans. Eventually you met again, Rebekah, but that doesn’t matter as much as what I’m about to say. I, Elijah Mikaelson, your husband, have travelled to see you, ending this compulsion to give you free will upon hearing what has been said.”

A few mere seconds had passed after Elijah’s compulsions and there you were, standing, and staring at someone who grew fondly familiar to you, bringing about tears slowly falling on your face as emotions were just attacking your body, hitting you right in the face with such clarity and impact.

Elijah only saw a tearful wife of his, narrowing her eyes with emotion as she didn’t know how to feel at the moment. He wanted to hug her and tell her everything was fine but he wanted her to make the first move, giving her the choice on how she wanted to react.

“E-Elijah,” your voice broke, causing you to just wrap your arms around his neck, breaking out to sob quietly. Elijah frowned in pity, hugging you back with such grip on his arms, wanting to not let you go. He gently rubbed your back, whispering sweet words and telling you to let it all out.

“My darling,” he whispered, “Just let it all out, it will be alright.”

Still embracing him, you shook your head, which he felt you do, “No,” you denied, “I’m so sorry, Elijah.”

This caused the heartwarming hug to stop from the two of you, as you simultaneously pulled out from each other. Elijah looked at you with slight confusion, after hearing you apologize. “Elijah,” you continued, “It was really wrong of me to lash out on you that night. I completely destroyed our anniversary night all because of one thing I kept going on about. Then I didn’t even let you know what choice I chose, leaving you to find out in a way you couldn’t imagine. I’m very, truly, sorry.”

Elijah gloomed, lowering his face with guilt, “No, Y/N,” he started with a low, sad voice, “It is I who is in the wrong, not you. You will never be in the wrong. What you asked for was something to do with what special thing we have. Of course it is my dream to live an eternal life with you, and when the situation appeared in front of me, I foolishly ignored it and words cannot express how wrong that was of me to do. I was a fool for doing so, for letting you go, and making you unhappy. It went to show how vapid I was as a husband and the guilt of that lives in me. It was I who destroyed our special day together, not you, but I. When you left without telling me, I deserved that as it gave me the time to reflect on how much of a mindless person I was that night. Knowing that you went here to start a life without me broke me. I never wanted to imagine what it was like to not have you in my life anymore and that fear arrived the moment we fought and I was trembling with such immense fear, knowing that life would crumble down without you by my side. I want you to know Y/N, that you are the love of my life always and forever. I am deeply apologetic for what I have done and I want you to know that I will do everything in my power to make things right, to make us right again, because all I want in my life is to make you happy and if you will, I would like to live an eternal life with you, for you are the light of my life.”

It didn’t take another second for you to think about it. Despite going through a lot on both your ends, he was still the love of your life. If there was one thing the Mikaelsons taught you, it was that no matter what happens, family will always come down as the number one thing in life, always and forever.

You nodded, starting to grow a smile on your face, followed along with giggles, which caused Elijah to tense down and return the smile, “Yes, Elijah,” you replied, “I will always love you with all my heart. You are after all, my husband, my lover, my favorite person in the entire world and I would never want things to end between us for you too are the light of my life.”

With that, Elijah cupped your face and connected his lips with yours, planting a passionate and heartwarming kiss to end the beautiful day in one of your favorite places with your favorite person. You returned to wrapping your arms around his neck, hoping to stay like this forever with him.

Perhaps the two of you could stay in this beautiful place for awhile, after all… It is your special week in the end.

[gb-patch]

Ask Answers: January 5th, 2021

How exactly can we get the option to gift cove a bracelet at the start of step 3? I really only get that option with having a ponytail-black shirt-black pants-no accessories cove but i dont know the specific requirements for the option to show up

Cove’s gotta wear a bracelet in Step 2. If he doesn’t it means him liking bracelets isn’t a very long-standing trait and so the MC wouldn’t think to get him one as a gift.

I am very sorry if this was asked before but I have noticed "Our Life: Beginnings and Always" and "Our Like: Now and Forever." Did I miss something? Is "N&F" going to be a sequel or DLC? Are we going to see a geriatric Cove? (haha) Thank you in advance for the reply. ^_^ 

Our Life: Now & Forever is a new game in the franchise, but it’s not a sequel. It’ll have a new cast, new story, and new setting. It will still have all the best features of the original game and be about creating your own character/growing up from childhood!

Is there a specific reason why Cove gets so flustered and has to jump out if bed and walk it off when they share a bed in step 3? It seems a bit over the top for something they've already done twice! Once with the late night visit when Cove finds out his mom is coming and once in the RV.

Is just because they are older and the implications are different, even though the crush was already there in the RV/latenight visit scenes? Or did I miss something that made Cove more reluctant or more apprehensive towards sharing a bed/touching?

Sharing a bed with the person he likes/love is different for him at eighteen than it is at thirteen. Some things get easier when you grow up, like he’s more comfortable sharing food, but some things get harder/more complicated to him. Sharing a bed is one of those for Cove. It feels a lot more intimate and meaningful as time goes on, rather than less of a big deal.

Hello! First, I wanted to thank you and congratulate you for this amazing game. I enjoyed every single second! In a year full of stress, this was a little cozy light. Do you have any plans to make it available for other languages? Thank you again 💕 

Thank you! I’m afraid the game is still in pretty active development so we can’t consider translating the script in it’s semi-incomplete form. And we’re not a big enough company that we can promise translations will definitely come when the game is done, unfortunately. We can see what things are like when all the words are truly set, though.

Did Cove's name come from that Cove restaurant on Holden beach? Whenever I search up his name I always get those results haha 

No, haha. His first name was based on his character and the game’s theme, his last name is a reference to something of a personal joke.

Will the NSFW DLC have CGs too?

Yep!

So, to start off, I need to thank you guys, from the bottom of my heart, for creating Cove Holden. I want every single one of my MCs to be able to get engaged and married to that precious angel, so I was wondering how transitioning into step 4 using save files will work? Will I be able to load up a save file saved right before the end credits after step 3, or will I need to load one from before the transition section after step 3? I’m sorry if this has already been answered somewhere, but if it has, I haven’t been able to find it. Thank you!!!!!! 

Thank you very much c:. You’ll be able to load any save file, unless it was taken as the credits were actually rolling, and the Step 4 epilogue will simply start going once you’ve played through whatever was left of the main game and seen the credits. There are rare cases where a save file breaks between updates, but generally continuing where you left off should work for people.

Hi! I absolutely adore our life, and I was wondering is there a way to have Shiloh remember the MC and Lizzie in step 3?

I’m glad you like it! Sadly, no matter what you do Shiloh will act the same in that scene.

Hi! I'm the Australian that asked about ever including an Aussie VA, do you have any future plans for Our Life 2 or any other games to include an Aussie character and VA? 

Right now we don’t have any guaranteed future Aussie roles. But we don’t have fully developed character lists for our upcoming games yet, so that may still change.

Will OL2 also follow the tradition of "Blonde Adult That We Cannot Date"? 👀

Haha, maybe. There isn’t one right now, however we still have a lot of side characters to plan.

Hey, are the houses in the game furnished based on items in the Sims 4? I’ve noticed some similarities, but I’m not sure if it’s just a coincidence. (If it is, that’d make me building it in TS4 MUCH easier...)

For me, I use real world pictures as references as well as text notes. I loved Sims 2 when I was young but haven’t gotten into a new Sims game since. I don’t believe the artist checks Sims 4 when creating their work, though it’s not impossible. Maybe they do.

is it possible to still get your name in the voiced dlc [I'm not sure how you would do it, is it from patreon ??] or is it too late ?? 

Currently there’s no way to get your name voiced. But we are looking into opening up a method for that one more time later this year. You can keep an eye out for that!

Will we be able to ask Derek out to the dance if we get his DLC? Not a Derek fan but I'm planning to surprise my friend with this 

Yeah. Taking Derek to the dance is part of his DLC.

Hi! I have a question I've been curious about, if you're comfortable with answering! If Cove and the MC remain just friends into Step 4/MC dates one of the other guys, will Cove canonically be in a relationship with/interested in somebody else at that point or shortly after? Thank you!

He won’t. There’s not really anyone in his school, and certainly not the neighborhood he grows up in, that he’d be into other than the MC. As a pretty newly independent adult he hasn’t had enough time to truly find a special someone in Step 4. It takes a while for him to make that kind of move, haha. It’s totally fine to headcanon that sometime after Step 4 he finds love with someone else, but it won’t happen in-game.

i just wanted to share this cute little playlist that i made about cove! https://open.spotify.com/playlist/5wM7GNiJh5eRqhvLBperfQ?si=4FocdBsNTpeF053yOwaLSA

Cool! Thanks for sharing it with us.

No, no, no create longer ask answers please. 😌

The ask answers are not too long. If anything I'm greedy and wish they were longer... I'm already subbed to your guys patreon and I still can't get enough 👀 I'm in love with you guys 

Will you post more of those long form ask posts? I love them 🥰

Haha, thank you for these messages. I’m glad you’re enjoying the content.

——————————————————————

Thank you very much for all the questions! Also, if you prefer to just see the main posts without all the asks/reblogs, feel free to follow our side account instead: GB Patch Updates Blog

[icefire149]

You are good at angst so 28 bestie <3

I hope this was angsty enough for you Rubi! I spent yesterday and today's warm up on this one. I swear all the prompts I've done, they've all gone in directions I wasn't expecting. This definitely wasn't the scene I meant to write, but I quite like it. Please enjoy <3

#28 – When I am dead – Dean/Castiel

“I know I’ve screwed up more than any of us could have predicted, which is….impressive in it’s own way, but….I’m glad that you have Jack.”

With the tips of his fingers, Dean lightly twisted and turned the beer bottle on the bunker’s kitchen table. As he spoke, he was still hunched over and watching the last third of his drink splash and move against the glass. The silence stretched longer than he’d hoped. He glanced up to find Cas staring at him confused.

“Oh, come on,” he breathed. “We all know I haven’t done a bang up job.”

Cas’ eyebrows pinched together. “Jack idolizes you. You know that, right?”

A painful laugh tore from his throat. “You really need to introduce him to….honestly anyone would be a better role model.”

“It’s not your call. Dean, he loves you.”

“He’s a toddler. He doesn’t…..” Dean pushed the bottle aside and ran his hands roughly through his hair. Exhaling, he leaned back in his chair. “Cas, he didn’t even get to be a baby because I shot him not even an hour after he was born.”

Cas sighed exasperatedly, “Maybe you’re right.” He held Dean’s gaze for several heartbeats before letting his head slowly tilt. “What’s important is that Jack has all of us. He’ll always need you.”

“Even without the Michael situation….” Dean rubbed the back of his neck. “It’s not the same. He’ll have you. You’ll have each other long after the rest of us are dust in the wind.”

“Dean.”

“What! It’s true.” He picked up his beer again. His eyes locked on the lip of the bottle. “I’m glad you’ll have each other. I don’t want you to spend the rest of existence alone.”

Cas sighed, but this time his stare softened. “Dean, I….” His voice was laced with pain.

“I know,” Dean cut in. “It’s heavy and I’m not aiming for any kind of big emotional moments here, but...with Michael trapped-” He tapped the side of his head with his left index finger. “I figure I don’t have a lot of time.”

“You have decades,” Cas said firmly. “We’re going to solve this problem just as we’ve always done and you’re going to be here to see Jack’s 5thbirthday.” He stood up and laid both hands on the kitchen table. “And then his 10th, 16th, 21st, 25th, 30th, 40th, and 50th!”

Coughing, Dean put his beer down and raised his hands, hoping that Cas would calm down. “Do you realize how old I’d be?”

“Yes,” Cas said with a deadly serious aura. “I’ve done the math, several times.”

“You might wanna run it again,” Dean joked. He wasn’t able to stop his tongue. “If you ask Claire she’d tell you that I’m already geriatric for a hunter.”

The corner of Cas’ lip twitched. “I don’t doubt her assessment. If you remove hunting from the equation, then there’s no reason why you couldn’t see any of those milestone birthdays for Jack. Claire’s milestone birthdays as well.”

“You’re asking an awful lot,” Dean shook his head. He could still vividly remember the days where he honest to God thought that living past 30 was a pipedream, and now, Cas was expecting him to see his 90s….

“It’s the bare minimum.” Cas sat back down in his seat. He still had the palms of his hands resting on the cool table.

“As long as you’re in the wheel chair next to me,” Dean grinned. The thought of living to a ripe old age was terrifying, but he could do it if Cas was there with him. His nervous heartbeat started to settle the moment he imagined the angel there at his side. His hair would be more than peppered with gray patches. He’d probably be wearing reading glasses so much they’d be glued to his nose. And he’d have a closet of colorful, chunky knit sweaters to replace his long worn out trench coat.

Cas’ warm smile quickly wobbled and wavered before some other emotion won in his eyes. Dean almost chased it, but then it too was replaced with something else: a more teasing glint. A hint of Cas’ teeth caught his eye now. “I’ll try my best, but I’d imagined I would be kicking your wheel chair to every event.”

“Oh right,” Dean mumbled, remembering the whole point of this conversation. “Angels are eternal.” He laughed. “People will eventually think you’re my grandson.”

“I was thinking…..more like nurse, or doctor.”

Dean swallowed sharply. He nodded, trying to ignore the way his ears burned.

The look dimmed in Cas’ eyes, and his shoulders slumped. “I’m sorry,” he muttered. “I don’t want you to give up. I can’t imagine this world without you in it.”

“I get it,” Dean said, losing himself to his memories. There was something about that kind of pain that made any complication seem solvable. Like it wasn’t until he’d been cleaved open by death’s scythe that his truth was free.

Dean still remembered his father pulling Sammy free from his arms as their house burned down, and how even still his mouth couldn’t stop whispering to empty air the same promises: I love you. Dad will fix this. We’re safe.

What felt like a life time later, he remembered whispering almost the same words into his brother’s hair as he bled out in his arms. I love you. I’ll fix this. I’ll bring you home.

The worst was when his hands shook uncontrollably in the dirt and ash outside of Kelly’s cabin in North Cove. Dean waited from the moment the light extinguished from Cas’ eyes all the way until the final coals cooled for a miracle. He waited for Cas to rise. He waited for his world to start spinning again.

It wasn’t until he was down on his knees with his wrist buried in the pyre’s remains that he was torn in half. The sun was never gonna shine again. And now there was no warmth to hold, hair to comb, and skin to touch. Dean cried until he was too exhausted to keep spilling out the same words over, and over again: I love you. Come back to me. I’m so sorry. Please, don’t leave me.

His throat hurt like he was suffocating on the pyre’s smoke. Dean’s gaze slid back to Cas, and he was able to breathe deep again. Cas’ studied him like he was desperately trying to uncover what horrors he was reliving again, so Dean downed the last of his drink, but he couldn’t bear to break the eye contact. Like a part of him was still afraid that Cas would turn to ash dusting the meadow’s flowers once again.

“What’s wrong?”

“Nothing,” Dean lied. How do you tell someone that you’re incapable of loving them until they’re dead? “I just….” Dean shook his head. “Can you promise me something?”

“Anything, of course.”

“When I die-”

“Dean.” Cas leaned back in his chair.

“Dude, just listen. When I die, I need you to promise me that you’ll come visit me. Break me out of whatever memory loop I’m in.”

Bewildered, Cas’ eyebrows furrowed. “Okay.”

“There’s something I’ll only be able to say then.”

Cas leaned forward in his chair. His stare pierced into Dean, unwavering, like he was certain that he could learn all he needed from his eyes alone. “Dean, you can tell me now. You can always tell me, anything at all.”

“I know, but just promise me this. It’ll be worth the wait.”

Ask me more writing prompts (I’m using these as warm ups so send a number and a ship)

Prompts I've done so far

[tsrookie]

Illicit Affairs

Pairing: Ethan Ramsey x F!MC (Alyssa Brooks)

A/N: Hey everyone! So this is my first time writing a fic and... I’m pretty nervous😅 Massive thanks to @kaavyaethanramsey and @ohramsey for pre-reading this fic. Thanks so much for your support you guys!

Song Inspiration: Illicit Affairs by Taylor Swift

Word Count: 2463, so yeah, I went a lil overboard😬

Warnings: One curse word. Pretty tame besides that.

Summary: My version of what might’ve went on in MC’s head after the kiss in Chapter 8. And uh, excuse the Taylor Swift references😁

——————————————

Make sure nobody sees you leave

Hood over your head, keep your eyes down

Tell your friends you’re out for a run

You’ll be flushed when you return

She watched the lights of Boston city pass in a blur as her head reeled from what had just happened. Ethan Ramsey had kissed her. Not the other way around like it had been for a very long time. She was still flushed from the encounter and had no idea what to make of it.

She got out of the cab and walked to her apartment in a haze. “God I hope no one’s still awake.”, she thought to herself as she was about to open the door. But as fate would have it, Jackie was curled up on the couch with her phone. “Where on earth have you been?”, she asked, as Alyssa’s mind struggled to give a proper answer. She’d told Sienna about her whereabouts and had hoped that she would’ve given the others an explanation. “Just went for a walk. Needed to clear my head after that match.”, she finally said. Jackie skeptically raised an eyebrow at her but didn’t ask anything else. She was grateful for that, as she had enough on her mind already.

Take the road less traveled by

Tell yourself you can always stop

What started in beautiful rooms

Ends with meetings in parking lots

She flopped down on her bed as her heart raced. “Why? Of all the 7 billion people on the planet I could’ve fallen for, why did it have to be my boss? Anyone, just about anyone else would’ve been great.” She hated herself for this reason ever since they first kissed in Miami. Her heart always aspired to rise higher, but the more she had to lose along with it. Be it in her career, or a relationship.

She knew that it would be hard for her family to see her leave for Boston, since her brother had also left a couple of years ago to London and could barely get enough time to make a call once in three months. She didn’t blame him though, he was her big brother and she loved him no matter what. But it broke her heart to see the looks on her parents’ faces when they found out that she was going to leave Cedar Cove too. They’d always been a tight-knit family and her parents had hoped that she would find a good job somewhere close by. But getting matched to Edenbrook was her dream come true and they didn’t want her to give up on it as they’d supported her from the moment she’d decided that she wanted to become a doctor.

She didn’t want to lose them. She was scared that she wouldn’t be able to stay in touch with them if she left, but thankfully, she managed to squeeze in some time every weekend to make a FaceTime call.

Then came Ethan Ramsey. Her medical hero, her inspiration for becoming a doctor, the reason she applied to Edenbrook. Never in her wildest dreams did she imagine that she would spend the second year of her residency working under him in one of the most prestigious diagnostics teams in the country, and possibly, even the world.

But ever since she first saw him for just Ethan, and not the world famous Dr. Ramsey, her heart longed to fill that missing void in him. She saw past his name and saw him with all his flaws and imperfections. The real Ethan Ramsey was nothing like the man she’d idolized throughout med school. He was an utter mess. But he was the mess that she wanted. She could’ve let go and focused only on her life anytime she wished. But she didn’t. The path of dating a superior was always avoided and forbidden, but she didn’t care. She wanted to be there for him, whether he liked it or not.

And that’s the thing about illicit affairs

And clandestine meetings and longing stares

It’s born from just one single glance

But it dies and it dies and it dies

A million little times

Her mind wandered back to the night Ethan returned from the Amazon.

One look into his ocean-blue eyes and she was a goner. Two months of trying to bury her feelings, all wasted in one moment. And she knew he felt the same way too.

She’d mentally cursed herself for staying past last call with him as she walked with him into the beer garden. She knew that he’d missed her like hell from the longing glance he’d given her when she had run her fingers through his new beard. “I know I’m getting rejected, so why the fuck am I trying to have a conversation with him?!”, she’d reprimanded herself while she tried to get him to say why he hadn’t stayed in touch with her for two whole months. “How am I supposed to push you to be everything you can be if I...” Those words broke her heart all over again. He’d trailed off like this in the exact same way back in Miami. Her heart shattered for the millionth time since that first kiss, but she wouldn’t have it any other way. She put on a brave face as she walked away from him, having no idea how she was supposed to ever look at him again without longing and pain evident in her eyes.

Leave the perfume on the shelf

That you picked out just for him

So you leave no trace behind

Like you don’t even exist

The day after the board had decided to solicit high-profile patients was one of the worst days of her life. He hadn’t said a single word to her since he came out of the boardroom. She was consumed by guilt. Not because she’d found a way to save the team and the hospital, but the fact that she had hurt Ethan and broken his trust in her in the process.

The next few days were hard. June and Baz were being as supportive of her as they could, but even they just barely skirted around Ethan, as no one wanted to face his wrath. He was an absolute monster to the poor interns, and she felt terrible knowing that it was all because of her. Sothy in particular, had only asked Ethan as to whether he had seen Dr. Rosario, and was chewed out in the atrium in front of everybody for it. Needless to say, Elijah was pretty upset for the rest of the day and it took a lot of convincing to get him to go on his planned date with Phoebe that evening. Alyssa felt horrible that everyone around her had to suffer Ethan’s harsh behaviour ten times fold because of her.

She had to, quite literally, run out of the office once a team meeting got over so that she didn’t have to be alone with him. And she only did her paperwork at home and in the doctors lounge, since she didn’t want to hurt him by leaving any traces of her work in his office. Ethan pretended as though they were never something special. He never treated her in any way less than any of his other colleagues, but his blue eyes that once filled her with warmth, now reserved a coldness that was meant just for her. Quite a few days passed with him not even acknowledging her. She felt like she didn’t even truly exist to him anymore.

Take the words for what they are

A dwindling, mercurial high

A drug that only worked

The first few hundred times

Leland Bloom’s case was something she personally loathed. Ethan had almost reverted back to his normal self when this case was assigned to the team. Then it was back to square one. But she wasn’t afraid of facing him anymore. The look of his face when she called him out for being a spoiled child would forever be etched in her mind. She was proud of herself for it, and deep down she knew that he was too.

His mood constantly changed whenever the team discussed Leland’s case. But he at least didn’t look at her like a criminal anymore, and that lightened her heart a little.

She would be forever grateful for Leland’s work ethic though, as it finally gave her a chance to openly talk to Ethan on the yacht, a task they’d both been avoiding for weeks. He’d tried to maintain an indifferent facade, but of course she’d made sure that he miserably failed. When he’d told her that she made it incredibly difficult to stay focused, she had almost laughed out loud in joy. That was a clear indicator that his walls were coming down, and that they were back to their old banter. He had made hundreds of reasons and excuses to push her away in the past, and he was slowly running out of them. “You can only run away so many times Ethan.”, she’d thought to herself as she looked at him fondly, glad that he wasn’t angry at her anymore.

And that’s the thing about illicit affairs

And clandestine meetings and stolen stares

They show their truth one single time

But they lie and they lie and they lie

A million little times

Her mind came back to the present as she remembered the kiss they’d shared a few hours ago. The kiss he’d initiated. A few weeks ago if someone had told her that this would happen, she would’ve probably told them to go for a mental health checkup. But it had actually happened. “Ethan Ramsey took the initiative to kiss me.” She let those words finally sink in.

She was supposed to be ecstatic. She was supposed to be jumping like a maniac in her room. “So why am I not?”, she thought to herself.

The answer was simple: she was scared. Scared of being pushed away again. Scared of Ethan lying to himself and to her by saying that it didn’t mean anything.

She was done with the whole “stolen stares” and “painful glances” thing. They’d both shown their true feelings tonight, and she was not going to go back to the start again. “I only hope that he feels the same way and doesn’t run again.”, she sighed as she thought back to her first day at Edenbrook...

And you wanna scream

Don’t call me “kid,” don’t call me “baby”

Look at this godforsaken mess that you made me

You showed me colors you know I can’t see with anyone else

“You. Rookie. Get in here.” Those were the first words he’d ever spoken to her. She was feeling a little insulted at being called a rookie at that moment. She never thought she would miss that nickname so terribly ever since her second year started. Sure, it was undermining her in the beginning, but she knew that it became a term of endearment for both of them as time passed.

She’d realized how much it actually meant to her the night she visited his apartment after her suspension. She knew that he was trying to being distant as soon as he called her ‘Brooks’.

There were plenty of guys who had hit on her in the past. Heck, Bryce and Rafael had pretty obvious crushes on her too back in her intern year. But none of that mattered to her after Miami. She just couldn’t look into anyone else’s eyes other than Ethan’s clear blue. Those eyes made her feel like she was flying miles above the ground. They made her feel like she was at home. Sure, to everyone else, those eyes would only show harshness. But ever since she’d gone with him to follow his mother, she’d seen nothing but an uncharacteristic tender look in his eyes that he had last given her when she’d won her ethics hearing. She definitely wasn’t complaining about it.

Don’t call me “kid,” don’t call me “baby”

Look at this idiotic fool that you made me

You taught me a secret language I can’t speak with anyone else

Her eyes filled with tears as she recalled the day she’d found out that Ethan had left, or rather, fled, to the Amazon forest. She was beside herself, sick with worry in hopes that he would be alright, and hurt beyond measure that he didn’t even bother to say goodbye.

She’d felt like an absolute fool. An idiot, who believed that they would be alright, as long as they just focused on their patients. She was broken, to find out that he had taken such an extreme measure to put distance between them.

“I am so so sorry Alyssa. I told him not to go, but he was very insistent.”, Naveen had tried to console her when she had marched up to his office as soon as the announcement of Ethan’s departure had been made in the atrium. She didn’t blame Naveen though. Ethan was as stubborn as a mule, and there was nothing that could’ve been changed even if she had known beforehand about his decision.

Sienna had tried, in vain, to set her up with some cute guys, but her heart just said no to every single one of them. Whenever she tried to give them a chance, her heart just kept telling her, “He isn’t Ethan.” No one could ever have even a small part of her heart since it completely belonged to him.

And you know damn well

For you, I would ruin myself

A million little times

Her heart hurt worse than ever. But surprisingly, she liked the pain. She wasn’t the kind of person who liked an easy answer. That was why she admired Ethan. He loved the challenges of being a doctor. He loved the puzzle. And so did she.

She pondered over her thoughts as a query struck her mind: “Do I love him?” She always knew that her feelings for him were strong and something special. But she’d never thought of the L-word before.

She thought about why she came to Edenbrook. She wanted to become the best doctor she could be. She wanted to make a difference for the people who had nowhere to go. But now, she was stuck in a situation where she was willing to risk it all for her boss. “I think I do love him...”, she thought. “No, I know I love him. He’s worth the risk. I’m not going to ruin my career by being with him. I will fight for this. For us.”, she said to herself with a determined mindset. She loved Ethan Ramsey with all her heart, and she was not gonna lose him no matter what. As exhaustion finally overtook her, she closed her eyes with the knowledge of her promise. She was going to fight for them, she definitely was.

———————————

Hope you guys liked it!😊 Let me know if you want to be added to or removed from the taglist. And any constructive criticism is much appreciated! I have an idea of making this into a series, so do let me know if you wanna see more song-inspired fics🎶

Taglist: @kaavyaethanramsey @ohramsey @aylamwrites @caseyvalentineramsey @starrystarrytrouble @dxnicaramsey @decadentwinnerjudgedream @nithya @mrsmatsuo @choicesolivia @rookiefromedenbrook

[queenbirbs]

surrender | Edward Mortemer x f!MC

Pairing: Edward Mortemer x Elena McTavish

Word count: 7.5k+

Rating: Explicit

Warnings: N*FW

AN: In the words of Kacey Musgraves: I’m alright with a slow burn. But when you want to speed it up a little, that’s what fics are for, right? Takes place pre-chapter nine and also kind of skirts around the very end of chapter eight.

**Re-post due to my dumb ass trying to edit the original on mobile and it wiped the whole damn thing. Cool. Cool cool cool. 

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“Good evening, Miss McTavish?”

The words aren’t so much of a greeting as a question. It’s silly, then, that her breath catches a little. She hides it with a stretch, raising her arm above her head and letting out a throaty noise of content when her spine lengthens. Dropping back onto her heels, she watches Edward finish his ascent up to the crow’s nest where she stands watch.

“Nothing but sea and sky,” Elena replies.

“Aye, should be more of the same on through ‘til morning.”

He settles at his preferred spot, just a few feet from her. She wouldn’t be surprised if his boots have worn divots into the wood from the amount of time he spends up here.

“I’m no Al Roker, but I’d say the nice weather will continue. The sunset was as gorgeous as ever.” She tips her head to the side and bites down on her lip, trying to pull a script line from her memory. “What’s that saying, ‘red sky at night, sailor’s delight’?”

“Al Roker?” he repeats the name, his brow furrowed.

“He’s... a person who predicts the weather. Sort of.”

Edward’s gaze flickers from the sea to her, and then back again, huffing out a short laugh.

“It seems that you speak another language, sometimes.”

“Comes with the territory, I suppose.” Elena shrugs. “What with being a twenty-first century transplant and all.”

She doesn’t miss the quick search he does of the ship below, looking out for any wayward pirates with curious ears, but she knows, just as well as he does, that most everyone is tucked away in the galley below deck. The only other soul around is Maggie back at the helm, who makes a show of feigning interest towards the starboard to give them more privacy.

“I hope you don’t find me rude, that I still don’t know what to make of your… claims.”

“No offense taken,” she assures with a nonchalant wave of her hand. “I thought about what I would do if someone suddenly appeared in my house, claiming they were from your time.”

“And what would you do?”

“Call the cops and then threaten to sick my dog on them.”

“The dog wearing the life preserver?” he lifts a single eyebrow at her, the corners of his lips twitching upwards. “Aye, a truly terrifying sight to be sure.”

“Was that a joke?” she asks, her eyes wide as she makes a show of looking him over.

“You didn’t care for the one about falling in battle, so I thought I’d try out another.”

“Not bad. But I wouldn’t give up your day job quite yet.”

Edward hums his agreement and turns his sights on the ocean before them. Elena understands why he enjoys being up here -- she likens him to a king, high in his tower, or a lion, perched atop his rock; all the world is an oyster from such a height.

Tipping her head up, she takes in the night sky’s view. With little to no light pollution, especially this far out at sea, the stars come out in droves. The Milky Way is a cloudy, violet river that commandeers the horizon. It’s almost dizzying, the amount of stars visible, layers upon layers of them blooming across the sky. Elena’s never seen anything like it. Even when she and her sister would skip their Friday classes, drive up to the nearby state park, and spend the weekend up there, pretending they knew how to camp.

She thinks of the text on her phone from Gabby and the plans they were in the process of making for her to come visit Elena in Los Angeles. When she dropped out of college to follow her dream, the few family she remained in contact with ceased their feeble attempts at communication. When she made it to LA (or, rather, to the one-room hovel she could barely afford), Gabby was the only person on the other end of the line, trying her best to cheer her up. The pang of loss strikes her hard, somewhere behind her ribs. Other than her sudden departure from the set, Gabby might be one of the only people that notices her disappearance -- which is kind of sad, when Elena thinks about it, given that her sister still lives back in Austin.

That thought launches a thousand others. How long has she been gone? Is time moving at the same speed in the future? Is she even going to make it back home?

“Lovely, isn’t it?” Edward’s voice jolts her from her thoughts.

“Yeah,” she agrees, clearing her throat of the emotions that clog it. The railing is steady below her hands; she clings to it, trying to ground herself as best she can.

“Tis... not the same, where you’re from?”

“Where I live, it’s hard to see this many. I feel like if I could get a little bit higher, I could almost touch them.”

Edward looks back to the east, where the moon hangs low in the sky.  

“I don’t see why not,” he murmurs, making a show of leaning close to continue, “if what you say about the moon is true.”

“The stars are a lot farther. And the moon isn’t exactly suitable to live on. At least, not right now. Or,” she pauses, her lips twisting into a grimace, “well, not in my time, it’s not.”

“I’m glad, then, that I’ve made the sea my home.”

If his words are tinged with melancholy, Elena doesn’t mention it. Though she could encourage him to elaborate, she doesn’t want to ruin this peaceful moment. The thought brings with it the memory of their afternoon swim: of his arm wrapped tight around her waist, of the hungry look in his eyes as he took his fill, of the ache in her chest when their moment was broken by the need to surface.

The crystal-clear, turquoise water of the cove brought its own reminder of the summer before her sophomore year of college. It was Gabby’s idea to use their open water diving certifications for something other than taking up space in their wallets. Having spent so much time after her gender affirming surgery entertaining herself with shipwreck documentaries, she booked the trip to the Florida Keys, flights and all, before informing Elena -- in typical Gabby fashion.

“I would never get tired of the views, that’s for sure,” Elena sighs. “Or the constant opportunity to explore whatever island I sailed upon. Like that tiny island we stopped at, I would love to dive there, spend some time exploring underwater.”

Glancing over, she spots Edward’s furrowed brow; she sifts through what little historical knowledge she has of diving. Have those weird, space-age looking suits even been invented yet?

“Sometimes, Miss McTavish, I wonder if I have not happened upon a selkie, with the things you claim.”

“Selkie?” she repeats, rolling the word around in her head, but recognition never comes.

“Aye, a creature of myth, though some people believe they do exist. My mother used to tell me stories when I was little, of the women who came from the sea. Once they reach dry land, they shed their seal skin and transform into a human.”

“So... kinda like a mermaid?”

Edward tips his head in consideration. “In a way. But selkies are usually considered to be gentler. Unless their seal skin is stolen, they favor their time spent among humans. And, when they tire of us, they return to their skin and resume their life under the sea.”

“That sounds sad, in a way. But I promise I went down in a diving suit, not a seal skin.”

“I’ve heard rumors coming out of England, of a man who salvaged sunken ships by trapping himself inside of a barrel. I assume that is not what ye mean, though.”  

“No, not in a barrel,” she grins, pulling her phone from her pocket. “I can show you, though, if you’d like to see.”

“Ah, the black box of witchery.”

He moves closer as he speaks, though, clearly interested in taking another look at it. If he was truly frightened of it, she supposes, he could just lob it into the sea. Her grip tightens on the phone at the thought.

Navigating to her photos, she taps at the folder (embarrassingly titled we’re in miami bitch!!) and turns the phone so the images can expand into greater detail.

“Some of these I took with a disposable camera, so they aren’t the best,” she laments, swiping her thumb across the screen every few seconds. “But my sister -- she has this fancy underwater housing, so her pictures are nice and clear. I would message her for more, but I don’t think Verizon has that great of service.”

She can’t help but chuckle at her own bad joke. Edward, it seems, couldn’t care less -- entranced as he is by the colorful images of the coral reefs and the sponges sprouting from the USS Spiegel Grove’s rusted frame.

“These paintings are exquisite.”

“Pictures,” she corrects.

“You say that as if I’m to know what it means,” he counters.

She swipes to a selfie her sister had taken, the image capturing little else but their masks and the blue world around them. The next photo is better: a full-body shot of Elena in her wetsuit and gear, a cloud of bubbles floating above her head. “I suppose this explains you being such a strong swimmer, when you jumped in after Ginny.”

She shrugs at the veiled compliment and returns the phone to her pocket, avoiding his intense look that she can feel burning into the side of her head.

“Well, swimming in thirty-foot waves is a bit different from the calm waters of Key Largo, but thanks.”

Edward reaches down and skims two fingers under her chin. He tips her head up to meet his gaze, his dark eyes flashing with certainty.

“Make no mistake, though: I am to see that you do not perform such a stunt again.”    

Elena knocks his hand away; irritation bubbles up inside her, heating her cheeks and neck.

“I wasn’t performing. I’m not the Wonder Twins. And I’d do it again, if Ginny or anyone else went overboard. Even for you.”

His expression sharpens, his mouth twisting into a frown. She crosses her arms across her chest and serves him a look right back. Whatever he’s about to say, she cuts off as she continues, “Just because I haven’t been sailing the high seas or… or crossed swords with some real buccaneers as long as you all have been doesn’t mean I’m not capable. I fought Robert and won -- I even got his fancy-schmancy sword -- and I sailed our ship through a storm, didn’t I? You need to learn to trust me and-- and… why are you smiling?”

The irritation fades from his face in one fell swoop, there and then gone, replaced by a soft smile that he seems to reserve only for her.

“Something you said, Miss McTavish.”

“I said a lot of things,” she points out. Despite the opening she leaves dangling for him, he doesn’t elaborate. She’s not sure why she expected him to; the man is stubborn to a fault. “Okay, fine. You can keep your charming and mysterious act. You certainly have it down pat.”

“As you do with your… turns of phrase.”

The tension between them cools, aided by the winds that blow towards them from the north. Elena settles at his side once more, the railing at her back. He gives a cursory glance over the horizon.

“You know,” she says, “I realized today that I never said thank you.”

“For what?” he returns his sights to her, curiosity warming his eyes.

“For getting me the hell off the Admiral’s ship. I knew he wasn’t a stand-up guy when he shot one of his own men, but knowing what I know now, I’m especially grateful.” She reaches out to touch his wrist, squeezing it for a long beat. Edward brings his other hand up and covers hers. “I know you took a risk, not knowing if I was a navy spy, but you brought me aboard anyway.”

“Even when we made you stand trial to prove such innocence?”

“Do you think I would’ve been given such a chance on his ship?” she asks, her tone thick with sarcasm.

“No, I do not.” Edward’s face darkens for a moment. “A man capable of such depravities would have treated you… terribly, no doubt.”

“Hey, like I said: white dude of high rank in the eighteenth century? He’s got about a two percent chance of not being an awful person.”

“You--” Edward pauses, lowering his voice as he continues, “are things… different, in your time?”

Elena bites at her lip, wondering how much she should divulge about the twenty-first century. Hope works much better if the outcome is still uncertain, and she doesn’t want to dash any he has for his own future.

“Different, sure, but also very much the same. There’s a famous expression: ‘those who forget history are doomed to repeat it.’ It’s -- let’s just say it’s been accurate more than once or twice.”

“I’ve never heard of such a phrase, but I understand its meaning rather well.”

“And, hey, that’s the second time now that you’ve referred to my ‘situation,’” she marks the term with air quotes. “Does that mean you believe me?”

Edward makes a show of heaving out a sigh. “I am making a valiant effort to do so. Your box certainly helps your case. It -- all of it -- ‘tis still rather wonderful and strange, though.”

“There are more things in heaven and earth, Edward, than are dreamt of in your philosophy.”

“You’ve read Hamlet?”

“I’m an actor by trade. Of course I’ve read it. And by read it, I mean that Shakespeare’s works were forced on me in every English class in school.”

That gets an exasperated chuckle out of him. She can’t help the smile that forms; she really enjoys the sound of his laughter. For as much as he tries to play up the stoic, unfeeling pirate captain, he seems to lose the battle whenever she’s around. “It’s all right, you know, if you don’t believe me. I know this is kinda crazy.”

The humor on his face is there one second and then gone the next.

“’Tis… not that.”

“Then what is it?”

No answer comes.

“Charlie was right,” she teases, knocking her elbow into his. “You’re really not great at changing the subject.”

That gets her a snort of amusement, but nothing more. Before she can prod, a cold gust of wind sings through the rigging, whipping up past them and sending her hair into disarray. Despite the residual heat of the sun-warmed railing, Elena can’t help but shiver, and hugs herself to conserve what little heat she can. Edward wraps an arm around her waist and pulls her close, his hand running up and down her back with gentle strokes. Her heartbeat quickens at the gesture, now familiar since he helped pull her up out of the raging waters.

“I apologize, Miss McTavish. I shouldn’t have kept you up here so long. You should go down to the galley -- you missed dinner, after all, while on watch. Can’t have you on a chameleon diet. And you’ll be much warmer down there.”

Elena shakes her head and reaches up, placing a hand on the warm plane of his chest where his shirt parts. His breath catches under her palm.

“No, I’m alright. I’m glad you were the next on lookout duty, actually. I wanted to ask you a question.”

“Ask away.”

“Do you really think the Admiral cares about getting his property back?” Edward’s body tenses under her touch; she shoves down the wiry ball of nerves in her stomach at the movement. “That lieutenant I ran into, he didn’t mention anything about--”

“Need I remind you of what I promised on our walk from the mayor’s estate?” he interrupts.

Confusion sweeps through her. Elena quirks her head to the side, trying to connect the dots between that conversation and her current fears. “You are no man’s property,” he spits, his voice gone rough from obvious fury. “And for as long as you are here, you are under my protection.”  

The wave of realization hits her.

“I was, uh, talking about the compass.”

“Ah.” He sucks in a deep breath and lets it out. The hard line of his shoulders softens. “I… see.”

“But it was interesting, to say the least, to see you puff up like that. I’m sure it would make any other lass swoon. I mean,” she lifts her hand from his chest and holds her thumb and pointer finger inches apart, “I was this close.”

He rolls his eyes at her. “Aye, I’d pay top coin to see you swoon.”

“I can think of a few things you could do to make that happen,” she teases.

Edward takes her hand in his and drops a kiss to her knuckles. Before that familiar swell of longing in her chest can rise, though, he shakes his head.  

“I will not risk it.”

“You would sail your ship into every storm across the Caribbean, but this,” Elena glances down to their entwined hands, “you won’t take a chance on?”

“That should tell you how serious I am.”

“I can’t follow your line of thinking, Edward. Do you think the Admiral will suddenly know? That he’s some omniscient god, overseeing all that goes on?”

“People are fond of gossip.”

“Who? What people? Because if it’s the crew, I trust them with my life, just like you do, and I don’t--”

“Not them. But anywhere we’d go, we’d have eyes on us -- eyes that could report back to the Admiral. And if we were -- there would be no world where I wouldn’t want to have you by my side.”

“But we--”

“Jealousy is a hideous trait to have, but I’m afraid I would not be able to stop it from affecting my actions. I’ve seen the people at port, the way they flirt with you.” Edward frowns at the dark sea ahead. “You don’t think I wouldn’t challenge anyone who tried to -- to woo you? I would not be able to stand idle while--”

Elena barks out the short laugh she’s been holding in. “What is so humorous?”

“Because you already do all that.”  

Self-awareness rushes in like the tide, flooding his brain. His jaw goes slack, as does his hand in hers, before he collects himself. Elena feels pinned under those eyes of his. She watches them drop down to her lips before returning to her gaze.

“May I?”

“You really have to ask?”

“Aye, of course.”

He starts to say more -- probably a long-winded explanation about his gentlemanly values -- but she’s waited too long for this to be delayed another second. Elena leans up and silences him with a kiss. He doesn’t turn and flee, like she expects; when he breaks the kiss for air, she gets but a second to collect her own breath before his lips return to hers. She hums her encouragement when he lets go of her hand to sink his fingers into the loose wave of her hair.

His lips, cold from the ocean breeze, warm under hers. Elena finds that his kisses are exactly like him: brash, and quick, and intoxicating, with the slightest hint of steel. When she draws her tongue against him, she can taste spiced rum and saltwater. He growls from the deep well of his throat when she bites down on his heavy, bottom lip. His arm cinches tight around her waist and hauls her against him; their bodies meet in a delicious roll of pressure.

“Miss -- Miss McTavish--”

“Elena,” she corrects, her hand skating up his back, searching for purchase so she can drag him closer.  

“Elena.”

His breath is hot against her skin where his lips trace the line of her jaw. The world dips and sways suddenly, the railing digging into her back. She clings to him when the sensation of weightlessness shoots up her spine.

It takes her a moment to register that it's only the ship underneath them, crossing over a rough wave. Concerned that she’ll end up pitching over to the deck eighty feet below, he picks her up and spins until her back meets the mast. Elena reaches for the lapels of his coat, but he’s faster, and snatches her hands in one of his and pins them above her head.  

“I have dreamed of this,” he murmurs, skimming the pads of his callused fingers along her throat, his mouth trailing behind with fervent, open-mouthed kisses.

She swallows back the moan that wants to form. A shiver dances under her skin, now damp from his attention.

“I have too,” she admits with a sigh. “Except mine deserve an NC-17 rating.”

“You know I don’t understand what that--”

“I certainly fuckin’ can!” someone shouts from below.

The wonderful spell they’ve found themselves under shatters. The voice might as well have been a gunshot, with the way Edward leaps back from her. Elena mourns the loss of his mouth on her as she adjusts her waistcoat and smooths down her hair.

Flipping and tumbling their way across the deck, Ada and Ax continue their argument about who can reach the top of the main mast first. Charlie, Jonas, and Ginny trail behind them, wagering their bets. Maggie’s thick accent carries across the ship, telling them off for circusing about, and ordering them to stay away from the rigging.

It’s not as if their tryst could have continued much longer, Elena considers, given that the crow’s nest wasn’t exactly a secluded spot. The twins make a good show of pouting, but eventually head for their quarters, Ginny giggling as Ax twirls her round.

“Maggie deserves a raise,” Elena tells him.

“Because she knows how dangerous ‘tis for them to be climbing about with no light?”

“Because she knows they would’ve caught us up here, making out like a pair of horny teenagers.”

“Ah. You--” his hand lifts in an aborted move towards her before he redirects it through his tousled hair. “--you should get down to the galley. I’m sure Henry is waiting on you, by now.”    

“Okay,” she says, because it’s the only thing to say. Swinging down onto the rope ladder, Elena starts to descend but pauses, peeking over the railing to catch his eye. “But don’t think this conversation between us is over.”

“Aye.” A wry grin flickers across his face. “I know much better than to assume that.”

+

Edward is right -- about the food, at least.

When she makes it down to the galley, Henry sits her down with a covered plate. Well, as covered as it can be with the dirty rag he’s thrown over it. She’s learned not to make a fuss, though, especially to the man cooking the food.

“Thanks for keeping it warm for me.”

“Took ye long enough,” Henry huffs, but makes a show of looking over his shoulder at her. His face, streaked with ash that he sifts with a makeshift poker, makes it easier to spot his sly grin. “Find somethin’ interestin’ up there, hmm?”

“I was distracted by the view.” Which is the truth, although she doesn’t include that Edward’s lips were part of said view.

“Nothin’ beats a clear night at sea, to be sure.” Swinging the stove door shut with a satisfied grunt, he jerks his chin towards a small barrel on the nearby shelf. “Charlie made some punch, if ye want more’n water to wash yer food down.”

She shakes her head; she’d made the mistake once of drinking their ‘punch.’ It put the jungle juice she drank back at college parties to shame. Charlie now called it Caribbean moonshine, thanks to Elena and her fiery round of swearing after taking a sip.

With the comforting noise of Henry’s humming as he cleans up, she takes a seat on the tin-lined floor and eats her dinner. Not for the first time, she notes Maggie’s touch in the confined space. Fitted across the shelves are iron bars to keep the contents from taking a tumble in rough waters. Tied round the necks of bottles with twine, scraps of parchment label each oil and spice in her spidery handwriting.

“I worked up a new dessert for ye to try, if ye’d like.” He produces a bowl of something that might come out the other end of her garbage disposal back home. Elena inspects the concoction with interest. “I boiled some hard tack in a little bit o’ rum and brown sugar, and then boiled mangoes with some sugar to mix in with it.”

“Ooh, like a compote?”

“Aye, sorta.”

In another world, three hundred some-odd years in the future, she could easily imagine Henry with a cafe or food truck, selling ‘deconstructed desserts’ and other kitschy items. Scooping up a sample, she’s surprised at the delicious flavor of it. The enjoyment on her face must be obvious, because a grin appears behind the ash. “Good, init?”

“Really good! Except, and this is going to sound weird, but maybe add a pinch of lime juice? I think it would really bring out the sweetness of the mango more.”

“Yer right, lass. That might do. And then maybe I can finally get the others to try it.”

“I’ll vouch for you,” she promises after sampling another portion. “Unless I die of food-poisoning tonight, and then you’re shit outta luck.”

Henry shakes his head and huffs out a laugh. “Edward’d have my head first.”  

“Did he at least try it?”

“I doubt he would’ve, if he’d come down for dinner at all. Too busy broodin’ in his cabin, I suspect.”

Elena hands off her empty plate when he motions for it. Curiosity, instead of hunger, gnaws at her insides.

“Can I take this with me?” she gestures to the bowl in her hands.

“Aye, have the rest of it -- and see if ye can convince the cap’n to get in a few bites, hmm?”

She doesn’t bother asking him how he knows where she’s going; the rest of the crew isn’t as blind as Edward claims them to be. “But if ye break it, yer buyin’ me a new one.”

“Deal. Thanks, Henry!”

+

Elena climbs up to the deck carrying her pilfered bowl.

From where she’s manning the wheel, Charlie throws her a two-fingered salute from the bridge. High overhead, Jonas wishes her goodnight from his post in the crow’s nest. Grateful that she won’t have to try holding onto the bowl while climbing up the rope ladder, she continues on towards the stern.

“What can I do for you, Miss McTavish?” Edward asks before his door is fully open.

“How’d you know it was me?”

He shoots her a deadpan look. Moving aside to allow her entry, he shuts the door behind her.

“No one else would dare bother a captain’s sleep, lest there was an emergency.”

“Henry told me you skipped dinner, so I brought you something to eat.” Elena gestures to the bowl in her hand. Stepping close to give it a thorough once-over, Edward grimaces.

“I will take my chances with starvation.”

“Hey,” she scolds, “it isn’t that bad.”

He does a double-take between her and the food. “You ate it?”

“In college, I once ate stale Wheat Thins drizzled with an expired bottle of honey mustard. And before you say anything,” she holds up a hand to stop the statement she knows is coming, “I know you don’t know what either of those are, but trust me: it was the most disgusting thing I’ve ever eaten.”

“And this bowl of slop is better than that?”

“If it weren’t, would I be forcing you to eat it?”

He mutters something under his breath, too faint for her to catch, but seems to concede. After a brief hesitation, he takes the bowl and spoon she offers him and shovels in a mouthful of the mixture. His eyebrows pinch down at the initial taste, and then lift in bewilderment.

“Not bad, right?”

“Not… horrible, no.” He sounds just as surprised as he looks. “This is one dessert of Henry’s that I may live to tell the tale of.”

“Good. But that’s not the only reason I came.”

“Aye, would it have anything to do with continuing our conversation from earlier?”

“All that time, Robert was accusing me of being a witch, but here you are, able to read minds.”

Edward gives a soft snort at that, collapsing into his chair. The desk in front of him is littered with maps and parchments and various trinkets. Elena crosses the room and comes round the side of the desk, taking in the starry view from the windows. Out of the corner of her eye, she watches the spoon swirl round and round in the gruel as he assesses her.

“Ye would’ve been a good jester, Miss McTavish, in a previous life.”

“It’s just us,” she murmurs. “You can drop the surname.”

“No, I can’t.” The grief in his voice is as clear as a bell. “In another life, yes, but here--”

“--here,” she interrupts, turning at the waist to study him, “in your cabin, alone. Not even then?”

Edward sets the bowl down onto the desk and glares at the floorboards. “We can’t let our emotions cloud our judgement.”

Folding her arms across her chest, she lifts a single brow at his attempt to backtrack.

“Says the man hell-bent on playing cat-and-mouse with an enemy to exact revenge on him for something he clearly feels guilty about? Talk about the pot calling the kettle black.”

His gaze shoots up to her, those dark eyes of his flashing in the candlelight. “That phrase I indeed do know.”

“Then you should know that you can’t kiss me like the world is ending, and then shoe-horn me back into a neat, little box, Captain Mortemer.” Elena doesn’t see it coming, she’ll admit that. She’s too busy ranting at the starry night, too pissed off with the man beside her, too afraid she’ll lose the runaway train of her thoughts if she focuses on him and sees all the emotions he claims to be above, all that longing and heartache and desire, painted across his face. “Since you’re so insistent on using surnames to avoid--”

In the second it takes her to draw a breath, Edward surges out of his chair and crosses to her. In the next, his lips are on hers. That passion she saw the mere beginnings of up in the crow’s nest roars with intensity. He cups her cheek and tilts her head just so, deepening the kiss; she can taste the mango’s sweetness on his tongue.

All at once, he pulls away. She mourns the loss of him with a quiet moan.

“My -- my apologies. I’m--”

Before he can worry himself into the ground with another fit of propriety, Elena holds up a finger to his lips.

“Stop being so polite and kiss me again.”

That familiar grin breaks free, lighting up his face with a naked delight that sends her heart racing.

“As you command.”

His mouth claims hers again. A muscled arm circles her waist, one hand splaying wide across her back to pull her close. She comes easily, readily into his embrace. His shirt twists in her hand where she holds on for dear life, parting for a quick breath of air, before diving back in. His other hand strokes a molten path up from her waist, brushing over the beaded point of her nipple. The moan she releases is louder this time, wanting more than anything for him to do it again.

For all his faults, he’s no fool. Sure, he takes his sweet time with it, dragging his fingertips along her collarbone and up into her hair to push the blonde curtain back, but he eventually makes his way back down. Cupping her breast, his thumb rubs circles against her -- even through the layers of lace and cotton, Elena’s breath catches at the immediate flare of pleasure.

Emboldened by her response, Edward backs her up against the cool, glass panes, his mouth leaving hers to suckle at her throat. Elena tips her head back, her lips parting as his stubble prickles against her skin. His thumb works steadily over her and she’s dizzy with the primal need to have him.

Braced by the window behind her, she hooks a leg up and around his ass. He needs no more encouragement to invade the space she’s created, his hips rocking tentatively against hers. Frustrated with the buffer of all her layers, Edward retreats to the buckle at her waist, his eyes searching hers.

“May I?”

Elena swallows to free the words from her throat, but they won’t come; instead, she nods her permission. The belt hits the floor with a thwack. Her waistcoat comes next, which she tosses off with a flourish. Edward captures her hands and tugs off her gloves. Spotting the gleam in his eye, Elena distracts him with a roll of her hips and frees her hands, chuckling when he mutters a curse at her.

“You’re a cunning lass.”

“I can’t wait around for you to strip me of my garments.” Her fingers making quick work of the corset’s laces. “Besides,” she drawls, “between the two of us, I’m probably the one with more experience taking off a lady’s corset.”

His eyebrow raises in response to her claim. The image of her and another tangled together plagues him; his jaw clenches tight at the thought.  

“That may be so,” he growls, reaching down for his own shirt and tearing it off, “but it won’t be their names you’ll be calling soon enough.”

Her blood flash boils at the promise. She grabs the hem of her blouse and yanks it up over her head.

“Jealousy is a good look on you,” she teases, tracing the line of his jaw with her fingernail.

Seizing her hand, he laces their fingers together and presses a kiss to her wrist. Goosebumps raise across her skin as his mouth trails from the tendons in her forearm to the curve of her shoulder. Nudging her bra strap down, Edward continues his trek to the rosy flush blooming across her chest.

Not one to play the passive participant, Elena cards a hand through his shoulder-length locks and nudges him down. He takes the cue and moves further south; she whimpers at the wet heat of his mouth closing over the lace of her bra.

“God, stop teasing and--” her gasp echoes across the cabin at the sharp bite of his teeth closing around her nipple. His tongue darts out, soothing any hurt, and turns to lave at her other breast.

Once she regains motor control, Elena unlatches her bra and flings it to what might possibly be the furthest reaches of the universe -- she doesn’t care, as long as Edward will keep doing wondrous things to her with that mouth of his.

“Miss McTavish,” he rumbles, tilting his head to run his stubble along her naked flesh, enjoying the ragged, little noises she makes. “You are well on your way to looking thoroughly ravished.”

Her wandering hand smooths over the tight curve of his ass and grabs hold. She smirks as he bucks up into her.

“Then get on with it, Captain.”  

Deft fingers pop the button on her pants and dip down below the waistband. Elena stretches up and rests her bare shoulders against the glass, tipping her hips up to encourage his exploration. She cries out when he slides two fingers inside of her. He gives her a moment to adjust to the intrusion, nuzzling the curve where her neck meets her shoulder.

“I’ve long wondered,” he murmurs, his tongue skimming across the salty sweat of her skin, “what you taste like.”

At the sudden loss of his hand, Elena opens her eyes to tell him off for his teasing -- but her throat goes dry when he brings his fingers to his mouth and sucks them clean. It’s a long moment before her world centers on its axis once more for her to ask.

“How do I taste?”

“Decadent,” he growls.

Crowding against her, he props himself up with one hand spread wide against the window above her head, while his other draws a wet trail down her belly. A short grunt of pleasure sounds from both of them when he slips back inside her.

Elena reaches a shaky hand up to hook around his arm, her nails digging into the muscles there. Arousal clogs her veins like molasses -- slow and syrupy and sinfully sweet. The movement of her hips turns clumsy and erratic. Sweat beads across her forehead as his fingers work her open, the heel of his hand circling her with delicious pressure.

“Edward -- fuck, I--” she cries out.

“Will you come for me?” he asks, his gaze snapping to hers. Desire clouds his eyes, the brown irises eclipsed by the black of his pupils.  

“Please--” he cuts off her begging with a kiss.

“Will you?”

“Yes,” she answers with a gasp.

Covering his hand with her own to guide him exactly where she likes, she stretches up for another kiss and grinds down against his hand. The heat inside of her reaches its critical point, flaring to life and scorching through her bloodstream. Clenching tight around him, her hips convulse as she rides out the quake of her orgasm.

Edward slides his fingers out, dropping a kiss to the crown of her head when she whines with oversensitivity. He brings her into his arms, smoothing a hand over her hair as her body shudders with the last of its tremors.

“Fuck,” she sighs, a delirious sort of giggle bubbling up. “Well, how do I look now?”

“Exquisite.”

Leaning down, he captures her lips with a kiss. She blames the blush from her recent orgasm.

“I think it’s my turn, then, to ravish you.”

“We don’t have to--”

Elena silences his gallant protest with a heady kiss, raking one hand through his hair. Her other runs along his side, where she hooks two fingers into his waistband and yanks him closer. Continuing down, she runs the flat of her palm against the obvious sign of his arousal. Edward groans into her mouth; he ropes an arm around her waist and carries her to the desk. With a wide sweep of his arm, he knocks documents and equipment to the floor before depositing her atop it.

“Careful!”

He jerks back at her yelp, casting a worried eye over her form. “Have I harmed you?”

“No, no -- I promised Henry I wouldn’t break his bowl.”

Edward rolls his eyes and grabs the dinnerware before she can reach for it, then tosses it to the floor.

“I will buy him a new one when we stop at the next-- why are you laughing?”

Elena shakes her head at him, avoiding any explanation by dragging his mouth back onto hers. It’s a rather effective technique, as she’s finding out tonight. Their remaining clothes join the messy pile on the floor. Edward huffs a laugh at her threat of injury if he rips her underwear, but seems to heed her words and takes care to drop them onto the desk. Moving into the space between her thighs, he grabs two handfuls of her ass and drags her closer. The soft giggle that sounds from her delights him; he leans down and savors the taste of it on her lips.

Elena’s hand wanders over his stomach and down the trail of coarse hair to take hold of him. He thrusts into her touch with a grunt, choking on an inhale when she twists her wrist on the next upstroke.

“May I have you?” he manages to rasp.

“You may,” she purrs, and guides him to her entrance.

With a surge of his hips, he plunges into the slick heat of her. At her gasp of encouragement, he slips out and then back inside, grinding his teeth against the clench of her. Pleasure is a ripple on the surface, building into a wave that banks higher and higher as they move together. The world outside slips from its perch, losing what little control it has over the confines of the cabin. There is only the two of them, lost in the frantic rocking of their bodies.

A shameless staccato of moans falls from her lips as he fucks her. Edward wraps a fist around a length of hair and pulls her head back, exposing the long line of her throat; he nips at her pulse point and then at her bottom lip, swallowing her cries of pleasure.

“If you shout any louder, the whole ocean’ll hear you,” he playfully scolds.

Spotting her opening, Elena tightens her legs around his hips and digs her heels into his lower back. Retaliation sings its sweet tune as she jerks him forward on top of her, the both of them crashing back onto the desk.

“Don’t underestimate me.”

“Nay, I would never.”

Edward props himself up with one hand next to her head, his other clamped firmly around her thigh as he drives into her, the angle somehow that much sweeter. “God, but yer a pretty sight, spread underneath me.”

It’s impossible -- that she’s here, that the desk underneath her is scattered with papers that would be considered treasure in her time, would be framed in a museum and ogled by historians. A quill digs into her spine and she’s certain they’ve spilled a pot of ink, but Elena can’t find it in herself to care. If she’s lost in time, then at least she has Edward to guide her through it; her beacon of light, keeping her adrift, illuminating her way through the confusing, treacherous world she’s been transported to.

“Elena,” he gasps, his chest gleaming with sweat in the candlelight. “Elena.”

His hold slips from her thigh and down to where they’re joined, rubbing quick circles against her bundle of nerves. Whatever he’s asking of her, she gladly surrenders. The wave of her climax rushes over her, flooding her veins and drowning her with euphoria.

The sight of her lost in the throes of pleasure is an anchor; he sinks.

Edward curses with his release, collapsing beside her onto the desk. Their sweat-slick bodies heave as they catch their breath. Something catches flame in Elena’s chest and simmers there when he folds her into his embrace, his palm cradling her head against his chest. His heart thunders against her temple.

She sees no better time than now, lying naked in his arms.

“I have a question.”

He hums with what little strength he can gather for her to continue.  

“When we were up in the crow’s nest, after discussing our love of Shakespeare--”

“--as I recall,” he interjects, “I am the only one who willingly read his works.”

Elena makes a waving motion with her hand, which would prove more effective if his fingers weren’t laced with hers.

“Whatever. What I want to know is, when I said that it was okay if you didn’t believe me, why that made you…?”

“Disquieted?” he finishes for her.

“Yeah.”

She can feel the weight of the sigh that empties out of him.

“Because I do believe you. Your mannerisms, your accent, your magic box with its…?”

“Pictures.”

“Pictures, aye. Everything about you should not fit here. But it does, you do. You’ve adapted remarkably well, given what’s happened to you. You are a strong woman, Elena.”

“I would blush, but I’m too tired from our activities.”

He brushes a kiss against the crown of her head and huffs out a laugh.

“Yet, despite how well you’ve adapted, I know that this is not your home. Your true home, that is. I promise you, once we stop the Admiral, I will do everything in my power to send you back home. But, I confess, I will be… terribly upset to see you go.”

Tears prickle at the corners of her eyes; she shuts them against the fading candlelight.

“Me too.”

His palm skims up and down the soft skin of her back, marred here and there by the cuts and scrapes from life aboard his ship.

“Stay.”

For a terrifying moment, Elena isn’t sure what he means -- and is terrified all the more that she isn’t sure if she wants to return home, at least not so soon. Realizing that he’s probably (hopefully) meaning for the night, she musters up a reply.  

“The crew will talk.”

Edward scoffs. “They do little else.”

Her shoulders shake from her smothered laughter.

“Is this what passes for pillow talk in the eighteenth century?” she wonders aloud, making a show of stretching and enjoying the noise of interest he makes. “But yeah, okay, I’ll stay. I might even make it worth your while.”

“Of that, I have no doubt.”

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References: an LMFAO song (it was between theirs or Will Smith’s “Miami,” but MC skews younger to me, so I went with the former), a line from Peter Pan, the ‘those who forget history are doomed to repeat it’ is actually a misquote, but I consider it enough of a ref to list it here. There’s a few slang terms from 17th/18th century and various pirate research sprinkled throughout. The USS Spiegel Grove is a real artificial reef, located off the shore of Key Largo. You can dive it with an OWD certification, though it’s recommended to have an AOWD to properly explore it. ~~the more you know~~

Thanks for reading!

[eyesofsteelandsky]

Too Good To Pass Up

First in a series of story posts related to an on-going effort to restore Brem’s eye. Includes violence and blood. Future stories will have a LOT more of both.

The crunch of sand under the heavy, pacing bootfalls had almost withered its way into being as much white noise as the occasional lapping of the mild tide in the long stretch of waiting. Several well-worn lines and circular trails around the heavy crate she had been watching over marked Brem’s impatient path. Even with the more frequent visits and having been in the area for the better part of a week now, the East’s winds and seas didn’t bring that same feeling of home as the sandy beaches of La Noscea. As she was settling into the internal debate if they were the comforts of a stranger, or simply she was the stranger in someone else’s comforts, a familiar pudgy figure called out from the tunnel into the small cove.

“Miss Abylnpfefwyb! I’m so glad to see you learned punctuality since our first meeting! And I do see you came alone as well. Were it that everyone in our business that could take instruction so well.” The bespeckled Hingashi hyur made his way forward from that cave passage, waving at those behind him to start filtering in. An entourage including a handful of muscle, some set with swords on their hips and others with long rifles. The last threw were a pair escorting a thinly, if particularly tall woman in cuffs. Though the woman’s long hair hung over most of her face, there were still clearly a few bruises over the visible portions of her cheeks. “I do believe you’ll find that the merchandise is exactly what you asked for. I do hope my.. adjustment in payment wasn’t too demanding.”

“I wouldn’t want you walking away from this thinking I didn’t respect you, Kubo. Like the obvious respect your rather extensive negotiation assistants clearly represents for me.” One of the sea wolf’s gloved hands grips the front of the crate she had been pacing around for so long, letting it crash forward firmly enough to erase much of her trail from the sand. A faint blue glow illuminates the machinery with, as well as the pair of tanks at the back end. “One Garlean magitek engine and enough ceruleum to get any prospective magitek business’s R&D going. Though as far as I can tell what you’ve brought is a tall woman with a black eye..” The Hingan man’s smile stretched so broad it threatened to chase his hairline even further into retreat as he snapped his fingers to have the captive brought forward. Once the muscled pair had her close enough to present they forced her to hunch forward so Kubo could raise his hand to push her hair up and out of the way, revealing the Garlean third eye in her forehead. “I believe you’ll find she has two entirely untouched eyes, even if the one looks more like a clam spit it into her head. “May I present Fulcinia lux Protus. Or is the ‘lux’ reserved for those who aren’t traitors to the empire? Ijin naming habits are so hard to keep track of..” The woman in question turns the eye that isn’t swollen shut or in the middle of her forehead out Brem’s way, but it’s clear any desire to resist had already been beaten out of her.

“Looks like short of tossing an Allagan puzzle for her to solve at your feet, I’ll have to take your word on it. I -am- rather disappointed that you’re asking full price for damaged goods.” Several heavy strides draw her pointedly away from the crated engine, with one hand waved back towards the man’s payment. “Though seeing as I can’t imagine paying with most of an engine is going to work, perhaps you’ll consider a friendly discount the next time we do business?”

“Oh, of course, of course. We’ll take a bit right off the top next time, as a show of good faith. The man’s smile lingers on as he snaps his fingers again and the Garlean woman was drug over Brem’s way, with one of the burly xaela men escorting her offering the chains of the woman’s cuffs forward. “Though there is one thing I should mention, I suppose..”

“While I do so greatly appreciate the business you’ve brought me today, Miss Abylnpfefwyb, you do have to know the value of what we have here in this bay. A woman who’s made a fortune blowing Garleans out of the sky, here with a traitor and and a salvaged ship engine. Do you have any idea how much that trio of treasure would be worth, even to a fractured empire?” Kubo raised his hands and gave a loud clap, leading to several fully armored Garlean soldiers to pour through the cave tunnel into the cove, as well as the magitek whirr of several armors, predators, and vanguards activating and stepping up from the rocky ridge, and several of the true constructs walking up out of the hiding places within the waters behind the sea wolf. “And I’m afraid if I have to choose between long term business partners with an army, or a bitchy sky pirate with a superiority complex, it’s not so hard a choice. Now then, you can come peacefully or we these fine imperials can take home the obsidian we can blast you into. Your choice.”

Her fingers curl around the chain she was holding, drawing that single teal eye up from the woman she was here for to the shit-eating grin being beamed down at her by the triumphant hyur. “It’s a good trap, well sprung Kubo. Even I know better to take on everything you’ve brought with you by myself. So there’s not really any choice is there? Though I must say..” The warm leather her hand was bound in subtly tightens it’s grips over Fulcinia’s bindings once more. “There’s an important talent in our kind of negotiations. The ability to recognize the look in someone’s eye when they’ve decided to piss on a good thing. And you, Kubo, don’t hide that look well.”

Though his expression soured briefly as she spoke, eventually a laugh burst from the Hingan’s chest, waving both arms out at the overwhelming force he’d brought along with him. “And what good has that ‘talent’ brought you, pirate cunt? You’ll leave here chained like her and I’ll be spending my imperial coin before the day is done!”

“The thing is, those who don’t hide it well usually don’t know to look for it themselves.” A swift yank sent the bound Garlean flying past her to land face-first into the sand as aether went ripping around the pale pirate’s other hand, eventually forming a spear that went flying towards the engine and it’s crate, landing in a pipe that fed the ceruleum tanks into the engine. Immediately after she flung herself on top of Fulcinia and immediately forcing the aether around her into plate after plate to drop onto the pair. 

A few stray rounds from Kubo’s riflemen made it past the initial defense, one even tore into the roegadyn’s shoulder, but as she’s finishing the cocoon of protection the magical spear she’d flung erupts into flame, rushing into the pair of tanks. There’s a brief hiss of build up before the engine and its fuel supply violently burst, catching the swordsmen rushing forward in the explosion while the concussive wave slams into the rest of the crowd within the enclosed cove, knocking a few unconscious outright while others are simply sent flying backwards onto the ground. 

With the signal sent and received, the roar of an airship’s engine announces the presence of the pirate’s vessel only moments before it rose into view from its hiding place among several several sea vessels. The First Mate was already shouting the command to fire as the heavy Garlean machinery on the ridge tries to whip around and chase the mobile arial target, catching each in a steady stream of cannon fire. Shouts of retreat from both Kobu’s men and their Garlean cohorts sounded almost immediately, though it wasn’t slowing the fire from the ship above.

Though the heavy aether around them distorted the sound, the shift in the battle, it was enough to get Brem to drop the spell and yank the chained Garlean up with her. “You want out of this alive? You come with me.” The intensity of her rushed words, half of a metal face, and the battle raging yalms away was enough to get a bobbly-headed nod from the shell-shocked woman as the pair rushed past the burning wreckage of the engine crate. With one arm wrapped around Fulcinia’s core as best she could manage, the roegadyn flung the other upward with another ripple of aether, launching the familiar shape of a frog tongue up to an anchor built onto the side of her ship. As soon as the magical shape tried to pull back, the anchor itself whirred to life and instead yanked back with equal force so that the sea wolf and her ‘cargo’ were hauled rapidly skyward, tumbling out onto the main deck of her airship.

“Welcome aboard, Cap’n! Orders?” The bright faced First Mate flashed that energetic and occasionally frustrating grin down to the bleeding pile of roegadyn.

There’s a snarl as she hauled herself up to her feet, motioning down to Fulcinia. “Get her below deck, keep someone with her and get that eye looked at.” Stalking over to the weapon rack on a nearby wall she yanked a long rifle free, stepping to the edge of the deck to raise it. Aiming one-eyed always had it’s challenges, but hours of practice and a burning pit of fury in her stomach steadied her hand. One loud crack of gunpowder and the paunchiest of the figure’s fleeing the beach collapsed just short of the tunnel out, blood flowing readily from the freshly formed hole in his throat. “Get us the fuck out of her. Once she’s cleaned up, me and my ‘guest’ are takin’ the ‘cutter. You need to get the ship back to home port before the Garleans start swarmin’.”

[agoblinwithablog]

Bonding Adventure

My boyfriend and I live in Michigan, in the lower peninsula, and for our first vacation together we decided to head up north, all the way to Copper Harbor, right off Lake Superior. Basically, the farthest up north you can go. The area is beautiful, lots of cliffs, and giant rocks along the shore. 

Our motel that we stayed in was right on the water, in a little bay that leads out to the lake. They provided kayaks for everyone to use. My kayaking experience is once, on a small river, that mainly pushed you, but why not. We are on vacation, its fun to try new things.

 I am more of a home body, sit and read books on the beach, Boyfriend on the other hand, very outdoorsy, and is the wild to my calm. Also another fact about me is I have no concept of time, or how much time has passed. We went out into the bay, little choppy but fun. We get outside the bay, just around the first outcrop of rocks, little bigger waves no big deal. We go around the second bend, and the afternoon wind picks up. The waves got bigger, lots of rocking, so we knew we had to head back to the bay. 

Boyfriend is maybe a few hundred feet ahead of me. The wind is so strong I am not making any progress. He motions that we need to go inland, and starts heading for a little outcrop in the rocks. I start paddling towards him, and see him pull his kayak onto the rock. The wind was so strong, and the waves were pushing me back towards another area. 

I noticed that the rocks there had a little valley big enough for me to fit through. I turn and paddle to that cove area, the waves helping push me there. I make it into the cove, and rest against the little area. It blocked the wind, and I was able to make it through it, and close to where he was. 

So I paddle around another rock, and get to the rock where he had pulled in. I get out carefully and pull my kayak up to his. I couldn’t find him, noticed he took his shoes. I figured he went to go find someone to tow us back. So I head up the rocks, and sit on the tallest rock that sticks out so I can see all around me. Figured I would get some sun while I wait. 

Meanwhile, he started freaking out because he lost site of me. He counted the minutes since I disappeared, and after about 3 minutes he starts to get freaked out. He goes tearing through the woods, in slip on sandals calling for help, banging on peoples doors. Running back to the cliff to see if he could spot me. Finally he finds a house with people in it. 

They call dispatch, notify them that there is a kayaker in trouble, gives my description, Yellow Kayak, White Female, Purple hair, black bikini. Dispatch tells them that they use their resources for recovery.

 Now he is really freaking out. The guy that he had run up, we will call him A, tells Boyfriend to get in the truck, we are going onto the boat. So off they race, they whip the lines off and start it, and go skipping out of the bay. 

Mind you I am up on the rock sunning like a mermaid. 

I was keeping an eye out for someone, and see this boat go racing out of the harbor, then making a sharp turn in the general direction we were, so I stand up. Boyfriend the whole time is thinking I'm dead, but keeps telling himself, and the others that I am smart I'm smart. But he couldn’t find me, what if he got me killed, my daughter wouldn’t have a mother, he would stay until he found me. A is telling him everything is going to be fine, I will be ok. 

Boyfriend was able to spot me on the rock because of my purple hair, and they turn towards me. I start making my way down, oblivious to everything that had happened, thinking they came to just tow us back. 

He leaps off the boat into the water and swims to me, pulls me into his arms and goes baby I thought I lost you, and kisses me. I'm confused. He tells me to put on my life jacket and get into the boat. So off I walk/swim to the boat. A pulls me in, and goes glad we found you. I look confused.  

They get the kayaks all tied up and stuff to come back with us. This is when the Boyfriend fills me in. That he has been running through the woods looking for help. I am slightly embarrassed, but smile because at least he cares right. 

Fucking see another boat coming out of the harbor, and our boat slows down and says we found her. I am asked is it you I said yes. So more slightly embarrassed.

We pull into the beach in front of our motel. People are gathered around waiting for us. The fucking sheriff is there, lights flashing in the parking lot. I had to talk to volunteer EMT's. Answer all these questions, whats my name, did you fall in, where do I live, all sorts of these. 

They wanted to give me a full check up. I said I was fine. They had to radio to the fucking hospital saying things were fine and I wasn’t going to be going there. Also they had to call off the coast guard that was 45 minutes away on boat, so the boat had to turn around, and the helicopter was 2 hours away. 

Had to talk to the Sheriff, answer lots more questions. Boyfriend talks to sheriff, and finds out there is only 1 in the whole county. 

After everyone leaves, we head back to the motel room to wash off the sand and sunscreen, and the whole time he is holding me, and I had to keep reassuring him that I was ok. I wasn’t able to leave his site after that, he kept holding me. It was very sweet, and romantic to be honest. It brought us closer together, so if you are looking for a bonding experience, its one way to go.

[jj-lynn21]

Cozy Cove: Emotional Turmoil

Saved by an Angel , A side of tits with your pancakes ,Fires Burn Hot , spending the nights , Learning and Loving , The end is not always the end,   Axel Grease, Big Decisions, Sex and Jet Skis, Late night fun , Old Wounds , Storms pass, Dangerous Waters  Nursing the patient , Making it Work , Never Have I Ever   , The Masquerade ,  The Proposal, Emotional Turmoil, sneaking

tag: @dragsraksllib @super-pink-a-palouza @loomiz @waywardtigersandwich @shkaboodle​ @theskarsgardcult @babyboy-cody @bskarsgardlove92​ @bill-skarsgard-owns-my-ass @shenevertricks1831 @hornyhetero @taintedglass  @grandpa-sweaters​ @bskarsgardlove92​

Warnings: the title says it all, dash of fluff and angst

Axel shivered wrapping his arms around himself as he got off the plane in Ohio. He had not even thought of the temperature difference when he got on the plane in jeans in a thin black t-shirt. He bought  a I LOVE OHIO sweatshirt on his way to the rental car area. They had his car ready as soon as he showed his ID, insurance card and signed the paperwork.  

He was glad the black Infinity QX80 SUV had a GPS and the heater warmed the vehicle up quickly. It was 3am by the time he got to the hospital. Axel did not think they would let him see her this late so stopped for a quick restroom break before heading to the ICU. Her parents were in the waiting room.  

“Axel.” Her Mother whispered to him as he came around the corner. “She is just getting settled. The receptionist said we could see her for a few minutes, tonight. I can’t believe you flew all the way here tonight.”

“I love your Daughter so of course I did.” Axel muttered.  

Her Father smiled. “Good man. Do you have a place to stay tonight?”

“I was just going to crash here until they let me see her again in the morning.” He covered his mouth as he yawned.  

“None sense.” Mr. Quinby told him. “You are staying with us tonight. You could use some sleep, so Susie doesn’t reprimand us for treating you poorly.”

Axel chuckled. The night clerk looked at him sternly and pointed to the quiet sign. He mouthed he was sorry. A nurse came out. She walked over to Susie’s parents motioning for them to follow her. Axel went along. Susie was hooked up to an automatic blood pressure cuff, heart monitor and had IV fluids hanging.  

“You can only stay a few minutes.” The nurse glared at Axel. “Who is he?”

“I’m her boyfriend.” Axel didn’t move his eyes from looking at his sleeping angel hooked up to all her medical needs.

“You should wait outside.” She said gently as not to provoke the obvious, to her, hoodlum

“No, he should be here for her.” Her Mother reprimanded softly. “Is she doing alright now?”

“Your daughter will be taken to a regular room in the morning.” The nurse informed them. “She will be released in the afternoon. Her toxicology report showed a blood alcohol level well below the legal limit. There was Fentanyl in her system that could have caused her to pass out. Somebody,” she looked to Axel. “must have slipped it in her drink. The police will be asking her about it tomorrow.”

“I think I talked to the guy who did it.” Axel smirked. “This really creepy blond guy was trying to get her back in the party while she was video chatting me. I scared him off. I would definitely recognize him if I saw him.”

“I see.” The nurse smirked. “So, you were not with her all night?”

“I was in California.” Axel was trying to keep his composure even though this nurse seemed to be trying to blame him for drugging Susie.  

Susie’s Mother put her hand on his should. Her Father told the nurse to let their family have the room for the few minutes they were allowed.  

“I’m sorry that nurse was rude to you Axel.” Mr. Quinnby shook his head. “People can’t see beyond their own fears sometimes.”

“I would never hurt her.” Axel gritted his teeth as he sat by the bed to hold her hand.

“You take a minute alone with her.” Mrs. Quinnby suggested. “We will be right outside the door.”

“And I will talk to that nurse’s boss.” Mr. Quinnby opened the door to lead his wife out.

Axel kissed Susie’s knuckles as she laid there sleeping. Susie’s lips were dry and flaky. He kissed them anyway before he got up to leave. A good night's sleep would be a good idea. He was starting to crash from the adrenaline that pushed through his system just a few hours ago.  

“Axel?” Her eyes fluttered focusing on the unbelievable sight. “Is it really you?”

Axel rushed back to her side. “Yeah, I’m here for you, Babygirl. Your Mother and Father are right outside. They are making us leave soon.”

“drink.” She murmured hoarsely.

He poured her a glass of water and held the straw to her lips. “Here, just little sips. I’m not sure how you will handle it since they pumped your stomach.”

She took a small sip and her stomach retched. “Maybe ice on my lips. I’m tired.”

Axel lightly brush ice over her lips. “Go to sleep. We will be back as soon as they let us in in the morning.”

The nurse opened the door and more politely said, “I’m sorry Sir...”

Axel stood. “I’m leaving peacefully Nurse Rachet.  She woke for a minute for a drink. I think a sip made her feel sick.”

“That is to be expected.” The nurse replied. “She just needs some rest. And I am sorry I insinuated you had anything to do with this. It was unprofessional and wrong.”

Axel just nodded. He was used to people thinking he was the bad guy because of his tattoos. His neck tattoo only showed the first two words in the sweatshirt, but it was enough to get subjected to instant criticism. Susie’s parent put their arms around him when he came out. Maybe it was his exhaustion or worry for Susie, but he just broke down crying there.  

Susie’s Father drives Axel’s rental while her Mother cared for him as she drove home. “Susie will be fine now Axel. I think you just need some rest.”

“Yeah,” is all Axel managed embarrassed by his emotional outburst. He was still sniffling and holding a tissue to dab his eyes as he looked out into the early morning before the sun was even ready to rise.

They set Axel up in the guest bedroom. Her Mother made him some calming tea. He was laid out cold before he finished it.

The Quinnby’s didn’t wake Axel when they started their day. Mr. Quinnby went for a morning walk as his wife got to work on a huge stake of pancakes, sausage and hash browns. A large pot of coffee was brewing also. As soon as Axel smelled all the goodness he sat up. He was a little disoriented for a moment. Then remembered it all and jumped out of the bed to shower and get back to his girl’s bedside.  

Mrs. Quinnby heard his feet on the wooden surface that only had a runner rug to pad his steps. She waited a few moments for him to get in the shower before knocking. She inched the door a hair open so he could hear her. “I hope you slept well Axel. Breakfast will be ready shortly. Fresh cloths are on top of the dresser. They should get you by for today.”

“Thank you, Sandra.” Axel mumble as he was letting the water beat down on his neck. “I’ll just take coffee to go. I want to be there when Susie wakes.”

“We all do, but first a hearty breakfast.” Her voice was insistent. “We can’t get in to see her for another two hours. You can eat with us.”

“Yes, Ma’am.” Axel sighed.  

She closed the door. Axel was tense. He felt bad about flaking on his brother and leaving his workplace to someone for at least two days without much notice. But he would have been going nuts not seeing Susie was okay himself.  

Axel is surprised yet grateful for the huge meal Mrs. Quinnby had ready when he walked out to the kitchen. He sat and she slid a cup of coffee his way. “We have several different flavors of creamer and sugar if you need it Axel.”  

She smiled kindly like he always thought a Mother should. She was so different than the Mother he had for a time in his life. The maid always made him cereal or sometimes eggs. Nothing like the feast that was laid out in front of him.  “I just take sugar. You didn’t have to go to all this trouble to make a huge breakfast just because I am here.”

“Don’t be silly.” She chuckled. “This is normal for us. I just usually make slightly less. It was no big deal. The pancakes are not even as good as you are used to, I am sorry to say.”

He poured syrup over them and took a bite. They were missing a little something, but they were light and fluffy. “Good, thanks.”

Mr. Quinnby came in and kissed his wife on the cheek squeezing her around the waste as he whispered something that made her laugh. He sat across from Axel. “Good morning young man. How did you sleep.”

“I slept good enough, Richard.” Axel cut a piece of sausage with his fork and stabbed at the hash browns to. “Thanks for the hospitality.”

“You’re welcome.” He took a sip of the coffee his wife put down for him. “Thank you for breakfast sweetheart. So as soon as we eat, and I shower we will go check on Susie. Sound like a plan?”

“Yes, Sir.” Axel continued to devour his food. Susie’s Mother filled his plate again as her Father went to shower. “Thank you. I hope I am not eating more than my share.”

“don’t be silly.” She was smiling at him like nothing made her happier than to make sure he was full. “It would just go to waste if you didn’t eat it Axel.”

Axel’s mind was blown. This was a different world. With a Mother that seemed to care. Even care for him when he was not her kin at all. He thought this was the way it should be. The way a Mother should act. The way Susie was going to treat their children someday.

It fucking blew his mind even more something like that even crossed his mind. Even though he loved her, there was no guarantee she would want to come back to him when her education was over. He pushed that out of his mind as he finished a second cup of coffee and second plate of breakfast.  

They arrived at the hospital minutes before visiting hours. The desk clerk in the waiting area was just sitting down when Axel went up for the group to ask if they could see Susie. The clerk got up and went to check with the nurse.  

“Miss Quinnby is just getting ready to move to Eight East.” The clerk told the family. “If you take the elevator up to the eighth floor, take a right, she will be in room 805 shortly. I would check with the desk to make sure. Sometimes room assignments change.”

“Thank you.” They said in unison. They walked to catch the elevator.

“She must be doing well this morning to movie to a regular floor.” Her Mother felt some relief.

“Yeah.” Axel mumbled in the elevator.  

“That is a really good sign.” He patted Axel on the back. “No worries, Axel. She is alright.”  

Susie was being rolled in a wheelchair into her room as they made their way down the hall of Eight East. They stood outside a moment for her to get settled in the bed. Axel let her parents go in first.  

Susie looked up with a smile. “Hi guys, sorry I worried you. I...” She saw Axel when he stood up straight behind her parents. “Axel? I thought I dreamed you were here last night.”

“It’s no dream Susie Q.” Axel smiled with relief.  

“We are glad you are feeling better Susie.” Her Dad stood behind his wife who sat in the chair beside her bed.

Her Mother took a deep breath, “What were you doing at a party like that anyone? Not one of your friends had each other’s back. Those are not good friends. I don’t think...”

“Please, Mom stop.” Susie looked away from everyone. “I get it. I fucked up. I made the decision to go out. The decisions leading up to this moment were on me not on my friends. Of course, I could have stayed home but I chose not to. The bad decisions are done now. Don't blame my friends.”  

“I’m just glad you got on the phone with someone that helped you.” Her Dad added. “It could have been much worse. Do you need anything?”

“I think I will be going back to the dorm this afternoon.” Susie sighed as she looked back at her parents. “Thanks Dad.”  

“Let’s leave the kids to talk sweetheart.” He squeezed his wife’s shoulders.

She got up. “Just be more careful Susie. That is all we ask.”

Susie just nodded.  

Her parents left and Axel sat beside the bed. “I would have come without the hospital stay. You just had to ask, Babygirl.”

Susie smirked. “And here I thought getting myself into a dangerous situation was the only thing that would get your attention.”

They stared at each other for a minute. Then broke out into laughter.  

[filthysweetie]

James Bond drabble

Prompt: “Dear Diary...” 

missed a day >.< this one is begging to be a longer story, but i had to cut it so i can finish packing...note that there’s a brief description of torture in this one.

Edit: This now has a sequel here if anyone wants to read it :) 

———

Dear Diary,

Let it be known this is done under duress. Apparently, not being a bloody field agent does not get you out of psych evaluations and ‘recommended’ methods to cope with ‘high stress levels’ and ‘worrying tendency to identify job performance as self-worth’. I bet they didn’t make Boothyard do this. You get kidnapped once and then everyone suddenly thinks you’re a delicate flower. 

Hell, Bond got kidnapped (I guess it’s just called captured when they’re agents…which actually is now making me quite offended that when I was taken it was called kidnapping) on 7 of his last 15 missions. I don’t see him writing a damn diary about it! (Although god, imagine that.) Besides, what’s the point of keeping a diary if it’s mandated and also!! Your psychiatrist will be reading it? Maybe I should start writing in code. 01000110 01110101 01100011 01101011 00100000 01111001 01101111 01110101 00100000 01000100 01110010 00101110 00100000 01011001 01100101 01101110 00101110 ——— “What is…that?”

Q turned, not the least bit surprised to see James standing there behind him. He had a mission coming up and was obviously ready for his kit. Q did a little ritual over the case, always so sad to see the fine pieces of machinery go when the chance of them returning was so dismal. Instead of focusing on the kit, though���Q followed his eyes to the little journal on his desk. It was covered in stickers (most of them shiny, some of them hello kitty gifted by a little one on the tube who got three on before he or her mother noticed) and attached in the pen holder was a pen with a fuzzy feather top. It was rainbow. 

Can’t blame the man for noticing it, it was a rather stark deviation from the normal color pallet and maturity level of Q’s desk.

“Oh, that old thing?” Q pat the top with a little more force than necessary, “my psych assigned diary. I figure if they choose to treat me like a child I may as well oblige.”

James took a moment before speaking, “And what, pray tell, made them think you need it?”

Q blinked, “Does that mean you’ve done it too?” That was a bit of a surprise. The double-o agents seems to thrive on their disregard of ‘normal’ coping, of medical, and of psych all together.

“Answer the question, Q.” James had the audacity to roll his eyes.

“Now I’m very curious,” Q can’t help it, “what do you write in it? About the girls you like? About more interesting ways to destroy my tech?”

“Mostly survivors guilt.” James says, nonchalant.

Well, that answers that, “Oh…” damn it, now he’s obliged to answer James’ question regardless of if this is an interrogation tactic or not. He gives a half shrug, “Dr. Yen assigned it after the kidnapping.”

“Excuse me?”

“I know, I thought it was all very much over the top as well.” Q fights a sigh, “Now your kit—”

James shakes his head, “No, wait, you were kidnapped?”

Q blinks, ignores the chill that goes down his spine; “I knew they didn’t release that on the official channels but I assumed you’d know none the less.” Q clears his throat, “Now, your kit.”

James quiets then, but there are a lot of questions behind his eyes. Who’s to say if Q focuses on his tech a bit more than he normally would. ——— Dear diary, 

I didn’t realize it had been kept quite so secret. I should have known, we are a spy organization. But I was {Q hesitates over the word, crossing out kidn and captu wishing suddenly that he was using his standard pencil instead of this purple inked mess of a pen} gone for 11 days. I guess I figured they would have told the double-os at least, maybe brought them in to help find me. Not that I needed anyone’s help, of course, I mean I got out of there myself, didn’t need anyone rescuing this damsel.

But the fact that {Ja is scribbled over fully; must remember that this will be read} there were agents I’m the primary handler of that didn’t notice at all. What excuse were they told when I wasn’t on the comms? Would they have just kept been given excuses until the forgot to keep asking?

My cats were fed, at least. Moneypenny thought I would come back, or at least held out enough hope to not sell my apartment and put my cats in a shelter after 11 bloody days. 

R had been searching non-stop—bless her, I think she needs this exercise more than me. Poor girl looked like she hadn’t slept since I’d left; keeping all the missions on track while searching for me. It was her and Riley and Sunil that found me on the security footage after I got out of that place and got me a pickup. It’s not like I was forgotten or anything. {Why do I feel forgotten? Q stares at the line in it’s stark purple ink for a long moment before crossing it out. He doesn’t want to talk about that with himself, let alone Dr. Yen.}

Regardless. R has finished debriefing me on all active missions that I’d missed some portion on, and overall everything is going well. Testing of the new laser pen fell behind during my absence but it’s to be expected. It will give me something to do tomorrow when most of my active agents are in transit. ——— “Q, Sir, we really need you in the pit.” Laila said, standing at the threshold of his office, seeming a bit more frazzled than normal. There are no alarms (auditory or silent) going off around her, so the attitude was a bit perplexing.

Q puts the soldering iron down on it’s stand and takes off the magnification glasses, replacing them with his own, already getting up and heading towards her, “What’s the matter?”

“Sir, one of the agents is being belligerent; requesting to speak only to you before moving forward with his mission.”

That’s a new one; “Alright then, transfer the secure line to my station please, Laila.”

It’s always nice, walking out to the floor, seeing his people working away. Standing at the center of it is like being cocooned within the greatest minds of London. It’s safe. 

“Yes?”

“Q”Jame’s voice is instantly recognizable, “I’ve arrived in Paraguay and will be rendezvousing with the contact at 1430.”

Q waited. Nothing.

“And?”

“That is all.”

Q blinked, glad that James couldn’t see the confusion that must certainly be coving his face, “You called me away from my prototypes to give me a standard mission update that you could have given to any one of my people?”

“Had to make sure you were still around, Q”

“Still—” it clicks, “Oh. Well. Yes, I am very much still around.

“Good.” Is that a smile in his voice or is Q projecting? “I’ll check in again after the rendezvous.”

Q’s throat clicks, dry; “I’ll be here.” ———— Dear Diary, 

When will this little experiment be over? It’s been a half month! I haven’t got much free time at all, and wasting it in this damn book isn’t helping anyone. Least of all me. ————— “I notice you haven’t actually written anything about the kidnapping?” Dr. Yen asks, looking through his entries with a clinical eye.

“I much prefer to call it capture.” Q says in leu of an answer. The sticker covered mess looks silly in her hands, but she seemed to have enjoyed his take on ‘making it his own’ even if he’d been doing the antithesis of that. Granted, some of his minions have added stickers to it too—so next to hello kitty is a ‘back it the fuck up’ sticker in fancy script with an old school desktop monitor showing the phrase, and a sparkly unicorn that Trevor insists is from his kids but Q has his doubts. If he leaves it on his desk unattended, when he comes back there are always new stickers. No one ever opens it, respecting some privacy that doesn’t really need respecting (it’s not like there’s anything of substance in there), but it’s a nice gesture none the less.

Dr. Yen smiles, “Of course,” Q wishes she were a bit more of a dick like Dr. Reynard had been—it was easier to dismiss someone when they were being an ass, “I notice you haven’t written about your capture—or escape for that matter—at all. There are some references to it, but no detail. Do you have any thoughts on why that is?”

Q takes a sip of tea. It is nice that these meetings are uninterrupted tea time—though he could do without the conversation. 

“There’s nothing important to say about it.” Q set the mug down, making sure to be gentle about it, “it’s all done, and I don’t exactly plan to get kidna—captured again.”

Dr. Yen gives an amused smile, “no one really plans to get captured at all.” Then, “Sometimes the act of writing down an experience”—she stopped using ‘traumatizing experience’ a while ago, Q did not have a traumatizing experience, thank you—“can solidify it in our reality. It may be difficult to do that at first, but once it is solidified, we can begin to process it in a healthy way.”

“It’s already written up in the after-action report.”

“Yes, but that was what happened, not how it felt to be going through those things.”

Q rolls his eyes, “do you want me to write a soliloquy on how sad and lonely it was and how I felt abandoned by MI6 and made peace with my death? Or maybe how it transformed me in ineffable ways and I have a new lease on life?”

It was so annoying to lay on that perfect level of sarcasm to have it disregarded so thoroughly, “If that’s how you feel, yes.” God she’s so earnest. 

“Well it wasn’t” Q snapped out. He picked up the mug again and took another sip. Setting it down extra soft, with barely a ‘clink’ on the glass table, “Excuse me, I must be more tired than I thought.”

“Not to worry,” Dr. Yen smiled, “your job is stressful any given day of the week, it’s certainly understandable. Please do give it a thought though as you go through this week. Sometimes putting things to paper allows our minds to ‘get it out of our system’ instead of having it linger in our subconscious.”

“Very well. I will give it some thought.” ———— Dear Diary, 

Lets give it the old college try, shall we?

I admire James Bond. He’s one of our best field agents, though his record for returning his tech is abysmal. He seems to come back from the brink of death more times than a cat and never seems to let it affect him. Always ready for the next mission.

I want to be like that. He’s been through so much, the loss of M, the burning of his home, the burning of so many false starts at a normal life, and he comes back and he may be battered but he’s still whole. Undoubtedly whole. I get kidnapped once and now I can’t even get a good nights sleep unless I’m folded awkwardly on the little couch in my office, and of course that sleep is poorer for other reasons. 

I know I’m capable, I know I can destroy countries and get myself out of most any situation that I find myself in, but I didn’t realize exactly how that situation would affect me. I haven’t lost confidence in my abilities, but maybe loss of confidence in my security? Is it just a waiting game to see when I’ll next be thrown into the back of a van, drugged, and then wake up in a windowless room, IV in my arm strapped to a chair with no fucking idea how much time has passed? When will I next find myself threatened and beaten? The soles of my feet slashed, so dehydrated that I can’t put my head up without feeling dizzy? 

Obviously I can survive it. I have. 

The thought of it happening again…it’s terrifying. And it can happen at any time. And I thought I admired James because he looked like a good lay. Maybe it’s because he seems unbreakable and I worry I’m already broken. ———— Q stared at the pages for a long time. Was he supposed to feel hollow?

He tore them out, crumpled them like a secret and then lit them on fire. This was a spy organization after all, no point in letting that level of weakness get out. ———— Dear Diary, 

Laila got a new corgi puppy. Despite being a cat person, I have to admit it’s quite cute.

[let-me-love-you-loki]

The Christmas that Wasn’t-Ch. 7

A/N: As always, written with the amazing @mox-made-me-do-it​

Chapter 7: Allie & Adam

Adam 

           Allie looked at me like I was the only man in her world, and I couldn’t help but grin. We walked through the stables here in paradise, wrapped in the scent of hay and horses. Somehow, someway, Stoney was in a stall. And, man, I was glad he was. That beautiful horse had been my best friend for a long time, and just having him nearby was soothing.

           I saddled him up with Allie's help. It seemed she knew her way around a barn. God, could she be any more perfect? Stony nuzzled her shoulder as she put on his halter and fastened it perfectly. She ran her hand over his neck and patted his shoulder. He nudged his nose against her cheek. He was a good judge character. Animals always are.

           Once Stoney was saddled, I helped Allie up onto his back. Afterwards, we walked out to the beach. Stoney oved easy over the sand, even though he’d never been on it. I jumped on behind her and wrapped my arms around her. I took the reins in my hands and off we went.

           The sun was setting in the distance, and the sky was a beautiful shade of orange and pink. We rode at a slow trot as the waves rhythmically pounded the shore. The smell of the ocean and feel of the saltwater mist took over my senses. We noticed a small cove in the beach where driftwood collected on flat, soft sand. It had a perfect spot for a firepit, a nice protected area that had a few large driftwood logs to sit on. Sitting under the sunset next to a fire with Allie Mason was the only thing I could think about. Luckily, I knew how to start a fire.

           We hoped off Stoney and started collecting wood. It was an easy job… there were plenty of dried sticks and logs lying around. Allie found a deserted bird's nest to help with kindling. Within a few minutes, we had a small blaze going. Embers drifted lazily upward just as the sky turned a deep shade of blue. Allie sat on the driftwood log beside me, and leaned her head against my shoulder. Her honey blonde hair blew in the breeze, and I could smell her strawberry shampoo. It was intoxicating.

           Reaching over, I gently tucked her hair behind her ear. Our foreheads pressed together as my heart raced uncontrollably, I thought it would explode in my chest. Slowly, I pressed my lips to hers the small whimper that followed set my world on fire.

           I woke with a start, finding myself still on the sofa. It took a moment before I realized it had all been a dream. My heart sank.

           “Damnit,” I swore, whispering into the darkness. Standing up, I realized it was nearly sunrise. I could see the faint streaks of pink and purple over the mountain. The bungalow was quiet except for the hum of the AC.

           Kenny was nowhere to be found. And I mean nowhere. I thought maybe he had gone out for a morning jog or a workout on the beach. It seemed like something he would do.

           Walking out on the deck, thinking I might have a cup of coffee, I heard sobbing from next door. I don’t know why I did it. But I jumped straight into the water and swam for the girl’s bungalow.

Allie

           My alarm went off at six in the morning. It was time for my new favorite vacation activity… sunrise on the water. I stumbled through the quiet, dark bungalow turning on lights and making coffee. It took a moment to realize what felt so strange. I’d been in the big bed alone. Leelee was nowhere to be found. I would have worried, but I knew that she liked sitting outside and meditating. I was certain I’d find her sitting on the hammock, maybe even asleep there.

           The last thing that I expected when I walked out on the deck was to find her sleeping on the daybed...with a shirtless Kenny. They looked comfortable. He was flat on his back, one arm stretched out on the mattress, the other wrapped around Leigh’s back and holding her against his side. She had her cheek on his chest, arm over his stomach. What in the world did I miss?

           I did my best to not wake them and went to sit on the swimming dock, hanging my toes in the water. Sunrise was my favorite time of day. It had been for a while… ever since my dad died a few months before… it was the only time I still felt close to him. That, coupled with my destroyed relationship, well… I couldn't help but cry. The tears started flowing, and I did my best to stay quiet so I wouldn’t wake up Leigh and Kenny. I looked over at the guy's bungalow, not entirely surprised to find it still dark.

           My mind drifted to Adam. I'm so glad he can't see me right now. How stupid I must look sitting here in my Harry Potter Hufflepuff pajamas, crying my eyes out.

           I heard someone dropping into the water and swimming close to me. It took a fraction of a second to realize that it was Adam. Panic splashed into my veins.  No, I screamed inside my head, you aren't supposed to see me like this.

           Adam pulled himself up on the swim dock, water streaming from his clothes. It soaked into the wood beneath us. It made his shirt stick to his body like a second skin. He was far more defined and beautiful than I expected—solidly built and yet slightly soft around the edges almost. His dirty blonde hair was slicked back, curling against his neck.

           “Allie?” Adam whispered, leaning toward me. There was worry in his blue eyes. “Are you ok, Mango? What's wrong? Why are you crying?”

           I tried to hide my red blotchy cheeks and bloodshot eyes. “I must look pathetic right now, Adam. I'm sorry. I don't want you to see me like this.”

           Adam took my hand in his when I tried to hide my face.

           “I think you look like you need someone to talk to. Now,” he reassured me, “I have been known to be a pretty good listener. Sometimes just getting it out helps.”

           I took a deep breath and began the long story.

           “A couple months ago, my father passed away. We were on vacation and watched the sunrise on the beach.” I looked up into the sky, thinking of my father’s face. “When we left each other, he was going fishing and I was headed back to the condo. By the time I made it back, he was gone. He had a massive heart attack on the beach while he was fishing.”

           For a moment, I had to stop. I was crying so hard that I could hardly breathe. The ache of that moment came rushing back. The ache… and the guilt. “He had asked me to go with him. I should have gone… maybe… maybe I could have saved him.”

           My heart sank as I looked into his eyes. I could see the tears fat on his lashes, a mirror of the pain that I felt. For a moment, we looked at one another. Then, Adam took me in his arms and pulled me into his lap as I collapsed into tears. 

           He held me close, his voice gentle and soft. “He wouldn't want him dying in your arms to be your last memory. He would have wanted you to remember the happiest times. Like a sunrise with his beautiful daughter that he loved very much.”

           Adam rested his chin against the top of my head. “He would be so proud of you and what you have accomplished.”

           “Then everything with Jon happened and… I just feel so worthless.” I couldn’t look him in the eye. “I haven't felt pretty in so long. Leelee tells me I'm beautiful but…  I wish I saw it.”  I knew he saw the pain in my face and the shame I felt. My confidence was worse than it had been in years. And even worse? Adam was there, seeing me like this. 

           “Hey, Mango, I think you are absolutely the most beautiful woman I've ever seen. I've been all over the world and, regardless of your shape, size or confidence, I am so glad I met you. What can I do to help?” he said as he held my cheek in his palm, his thumb brushed my cheek bone.

           His eyes never left mine. Slowly, inch by inch, he came closer. My eyes closed in waiting, wanting. I had never wanted a man to kiss me more in my life. The butterflies raced around my body with anticipation. Pure unadulterated want. Adam smiled softly and pressed his lips to mine in the gentlest of kisses. My hands immediately pulled him closer, feeling an odd sense of comfort in Adam's kiss. My fingers threaded through his hair, tilting his head, deepening our kiss.

           He was sweet and gentle until I pulled his hair. I heard the growl come from deep within him as his hands snaked around my back. He pulled away breathless, his eyes dark and needy.

           As I sat trying to catch my breath, Adam brushed his fingers along my jaw and throat and whispered, “Where did you come from? This is gonna sound terrible, but I'm so glad he cheated on you. That you’re here with me right now. I've never met a woman like you before. Trust me, I've looked everywhere. I can't imagine being lucky enough to be able to keep you and fucking it up like that.”

           We sat with our foreheads together, settling in the moment. After a while, Adam smiled. “Would you like to come have some coffee or breakfast with me? Kenny’s disappeared.”

           I found myself smiling. “He’s in the daybed with Leigh. I don’t know how that happened.”

           Adam’s eyes went bright and wide for a moment, confusion on his face. Then he let out a faint chuckle. “Wanna see something funny?” he asked, raising his eyebrows. 

Adam

           She was smiling. That was a good sign. She nodded.

           I stood up and climbed the small ladder up to the main deck. Then I took off at full sprint. With a quick blown kiss to Allie, I yelled “CANNONBALL!" and splashed into the pool slopping water on the sleeping—well, now formerly sleeping—Leigh and Kenny.

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