#i am so far north dude

[rottenaero]

AO3

Part 1

Part 4

Part 6

Part 5 of the roommates idea

Okay okay, so before this starts, a lot of people have mentioned me posting this on ao3, and my question is if you guys mean it as it is, or if I should make two or three new parts to make up for the first part.

Because in the first part, we miss a lot of possible moments between Steve and Eddie since it skips to the basic idea.

This whole thing was meant to be a messy and quick way to get my ideas out, but then people ended up actually liking it, and well, I just want you guys to like the outcome.

Basically, I wanna know if I should;

A.Post it on ao3 as is

B. Post it on ao3 with two to maybe four parts instead of the original post, and have me do part six after I make those. (I'm a decently quick writer when I'm motivated, all these parts so far have been within a day or two)

C. Make the parts instead of the original post, and have this be a big one-shot on ao3(meaning it wouldn't be posted on there until this is finished)

I am really leaning towards B, just cause I wanna do those interactions (one of which would be Eddie coming out to Steve), but I wanna see what you guys think first.

This whole thing is kinda a wreck cause I don't usually post fics on Tumblr but hopefully it will get better with time.

After Dustin explains the upside down, and Eddie talks about what really happened, they come to a sort of agreement.

Eddie was to stay at the boathouse, and someone would occasionally come over with a supply of drinks and food.

Steve, of course, despised this, because Eddie is his best friend-(And who was he kidding? Goddamn crush, too)-dammit, but he let the plan go on anyway.

Before they left, Steve turned to Eddie, brows pinched together.

“Stay safe, alright? If you get hurt because you do something stupid, I’ll beat the shit out of you.”

Eddie laughed, loud and full, “Kinda counterproductive, aye sweetheart?”

He stopped when Steve didn’t laugh or make a joke back. “I’ll be fine, and I’ll walkie if things go to shit.”

“Good.” Steve gave him a little peck on the corner of his lips, “Don’t die, man. Can’t take care of these little shits by myself.”

He turned to face Max, and a gaping Dustin and Robin.

“Lets go, nerds”

-

Steve stared at the ground, unblinking.

One of his kids were gonna die.

Eddie had had apparently left the boathouse

Eddie was being hunted.

Two more students have been murdered.

He licked his lips, and his eyes flicked up to watch Powell talk about the town hall meeting.

They were royally fucked.

“Dustin, can you hear me? Wheeler? Stevie?”

Steve’s eyes widened and he turned around in time to see Dustin snatch the walkie.

“Eddie, holy shit. Are you okay?”

The walkie took a second to crackle back to life.

“Nah man, pretty uh, pretty goddamn far from okay.”

“Where is he?”Nancy asked, already halfway back into the car.

“Where are you?”

“Skull Rock, Steve knows it.”

Steve smiled, grabbing the walkie and clicking down on the button, “Hold on tight, Ed-stefer, we’re on our way.” He tossed it back to Dustin before turning to Nancy.

“I’m driving.”

She scrunched her nose, but didn’t question it and swapped to the passenger's side.

-

“Dude, I’m telling you, you’re leading us the wrong way.”

“It’s North, I’m positive! I checked the map.”

Steve sighed and pinched his nose, “This is literally Eddie and I’s spot, we come here all the time.”

“That doesn’t have to do with it being a make-out spot, does it?” Lucas asked hesitantly from his spot in the back.

“Jesus, no Sinclair, this does not have to do with- Eddie and I are just friends.”

Robin scoffed, “Didn’t you kiss him earlier?” She asked.

“As friends. He doesn’t like me like that.”

“Right, but you like him like that, though?”

“Oh wow, suddenly we’re here, y’know, at the place you said we weren’t gonna end up at?” Steve yelped, gesturing broadly at the rocks around him.

Lucas has to physically bite his lip to keep from mentioning that he had absolutely picked that up from Eddie, or that Eddie had picked it up from him.

“See? You little butthead, I was right.”

Theres a rustle of leaves and then,

“I concur, you, Dustin Henderson, are a total butthead.”

Steve turned to face the man and almost collapsed in relief, hes not hurt.

“Jesus Eddie, we thought you were a goner.” Dustin sighed, as he made his way past Steve to hug Eddie.

“Yeah, me too man. Me too.”

The hug goes on for maybe ten seconds before Eddie’s pulling back and bringing Steve into a side one, you know, like some kind of dad. “I tried calling you guys, but uh…”

His face turned sheepish and he stepped back a bit to grab some water from a canister. “My walkie was busted, man.”

“Drenched.” He adds in after a second, laughing a bit.

He took another sip from the bottle before wiping and extra drops away from his mouth. “So, uh, I did the thing that I do now apparently. I ran.” He let out another laugh, this one was a little bit more self-deprecating.

“Do you know what time this was? The attack.”

Eddie perked up, and grabbed at his wrist, “ Yeah, no, I um, know exactly what time it was.”

He held up a watch, the dials on it weren’t moving. “My walkie wasn’t the only thing that got soaked.”

“9:27…”

“Same times our flashlights went kablooey.” Robin says, and her eyes light up like she connected the dots.

Steve hadn’t, “Which means what exactly?”

“That that surge of energy was Vecna attacking Patrick.”

Steve half-zoned out, silently going through the events in his head, while maintaining conversation.

“Skull Rock was North.”

“An electromagnetic field.”

“What say you, Eddie the Banished?”

Steve tuned back in, a hundred percent now. He turned to look at Eddie, who was still crouching, and damn how did his back not hurt?

“I say you’re asking me to follow you into Mordor,” Steve perked up, he kind of knew this one, “-which, if I’m totally straight with you, I think it’s a really bad idea.”

And Steve nodded along, because yeah, this was a terrible idea.

“But uh, the Shire, the Shire is burning, so Mordor it is.”

He whistled at Eddie when everyone got up, and he was by Steve’s side in seconds.

“You’re not hurt or anything, are you? Cause you don’t look it but…”He trailed off, and Eddie grinned.

“I am all-good Steve-O.” Steve nodded, “Good, good.”

Suddenly, there was a sharp gasp from right next to him, “Were you, perhaps, worried?!” Steve kicked a rock instead of answering.

It just made Eddie’s grin widen further.

“You totally were! Stevie Harrington, The-Former-King-Of-Hawkins turned sweetheart, worrying over lil-ol-Eddie-The-Freak-Munson!”

Steve scoffed, “ First off, I’d like to think I’ve always been a sweetheart, second off, keep it in your pants, dude.”

Eddie cackled, leaning into his side, “Yeah, yeah! You’re right. You’ve kinda been like that for the past two years, Mr.Eddie-Cant-Carry-A-Fucking-Hot-Pan-Anymore.” He laughed, ignoring the second part of Steve’s statement.

He huffed, “Just don’t want you getting hurt.”

Eddie booped his nose, “Yeah yeah, you’re just you like that.”

Tag List

@bxlthazar@i-have-three-feelings@leverage-ot3@mightbeasleep@badcaseofcasey@joruni@original-cypher@aceflavouredyougurt@flustratedcas@lovelylilbadone@labels-are-for-the-weak@steddieassheg0es@gregre369

[lonelywretchjervistetch]

The State Birds Initiative - Introduction

Before I do ANYTHING else, and before you read anything else...let's start this with a little poll, shall we?

...Look, I'm an overly ambitious person by nature. It's a problem, I'm fully aware. So, in the midst of writing character essays, imagining my own version of the DC Cinematic Universe (I promise, I will return to the Legion of Super-Heroes series; been having writer's block, not gonna lie), and about a dozen other projects that don't include school and my job (one and the same thing, and I love both, but I'll get to that one day)...I had another thought. That I would like to present to the good people of Tumblr (and perhaps beyond).

The state birds suck.

Most people on Tumblr don't know this about me, save for a select few that no me in real life (hey guys, 'sup), but I'm an avid birdwatcher, and am currently working in ornithology as a profession and student. As such, and as a former (and future) teacher, I have a vested passion in spreading the word. And one of the first ways most of us in the United States engage with birds, other than through the world and people around us, is through our national bird and state birds. Oh, and for anybody reading this not from the USA, don't worry, national birds are included here, too.

Now, in case you don't know for whatever reason, each one of the states in the United States has a bird meant to represent the state, designated by the government and often nominated by the state's citizens. This tradition started in 1926, with Kentucky's national bird, the Northern Cardinal (Cardinalis cardinalis). Now, most states have an official state bird, although Pennsylvania technically has a state game bird, rather than a state bird. We'll get to it. But in any case, there's a bird associated with every state.

But, uh...most of them suuuuuuuuuuuck.

Now, for example, I'm not saying that the Northern Cardinal sucks. Far from it! I love cardinals, and honestly, who doesn't? They're handsome birds, they have a lot of character, they're recognizable in most states in the Union by most people. I love them! But, uh...cardinals are extremely overused as state birds. Kentucky chose them as their state bird first, and were followed by Illinois, Indiana, Ohio, North Carolina, West Virginia, and Virginia. That's ridiculous. Also, wait, really, Virginia? You saw that West Virginia had it already, and STILL went for the cardinal? What the hell?

But why? Maybe there's a good reason for all of those states to choose the cardinal, after all. Obviously, it's present in all of those states, because...well, the Northern Cardinal is basically everywhere. But other than that, why? Well, let's see.

Kentucky: Unclear, but it's likely because of its prevalence, songs, and nonmigratory behavior, at least according to some sources; there isn't a lot of evidence online as to why outside of this.

Illinois: For this one, we blame the children. Yeah, kids voted this one sd the symbol, choosing it over the bluebird, meadowlark, bobwhite, and oriole, according to the Illinois Department of Natural Resources. So, yeah, probably because it's familiar and red.

Indiana: For...reasons. Yeah, even less is known about this choice. Safe to assume, though, that it's because it's familiar and red.

Ohio: Apparently, this is because it's red and has a cheerful song. 'Kay. Again, not a lot of evidence for this one, but we'll go with it.

North Carolina: This one also came down to public vote, after a campaign initiated by the North Carolina Bird Club in 1943. It won over the red-winged blackbird, wild turkey, scarlet tanager, and gray catbird. Apparently, this was the second attempt at a state bird, as the Carolina Chickadee (Poecile carolinensis) had been chosen ten years earlier, but only retained the position for a week because the bird's other name is, and this is true, the tomtit. And that was apparently too lewd for the title of state bird. Jesus. We'll get back to that when I address North Carolina officially.

West Virginia: Again, chosen and voted by schoolchildren, and chosen because it's familiar, red, and has a cheerful song. 'Kay.

Virginia: No idea. Also, don't listen to the sites that say their bird "exemplifies the quality of the state" unless they have the GODDAMN PAPERWORK to back that shit up. If I had to guess, it's possibly because the northern cardinal is one of the first birds seen in the state by settlers to the continental USA, who landed in...Virginia. So, the state's got a historical connection to the cardinal, meaning that the last state to ratify it as a state bird is the one to make the most sense to do so.

So, yeah...only one of those makes sense to me. Otherwise, it just feels...random. And by the way, many of the state birds do make some sense. Utah's choice, the California Gull (Larus californicus), has roots in a Mormon miracle, which makes perfect sense for the Mormon state. Louisiana's Brown Pelican (Pelecanus occidentalis) is an iconic species to the American southeast, and a massive proportion of the species breeds in the state. Same goes for the Scissor-tailed Flycatcher (Tyrannus forficatus), the state bird of Oklahoma. Iconic and unique grassland bird, and it breeds within the state in high quantities for the global population.

But others? Why does New York (a state I grew up in and around) have the Eastern Bluebird (Sialia sialis) for its state bird? Because it's blue and nice-looking? Why exactly do Wyoming, Oregon, Nebraska, Kansas, Montana, and North Dakota ALL have the Western Meadowlark (Sturnella neglecta)? I love the song too, and it's an iconic grassland species, but really? All of you? And Maine? Maine...Maine. I mean, you didn't even go for a specific species and just listed "chickadee" as your state bird. Why? There is a MUCH. BETTER. OPTION. OBVIOUSLY. But...I digress.

...FUCK IT

WHY ON GOD'S GREEN EARTH IS MAINE'S STATE BIRD NOT THE ATLANTIC PUFFIN (Fratercula arctica)??? ANSWER ME MAINE GODDAMMIT

Seriously, what the hell? It's the only state IN THE UNION where the Atlantic puffin breeds, and it's an incredibly iconic bird! I mean, look at that thing! They're adorable, fish-eating, clumsy-flying, feathery orbs with a Froot Loops beak (for part of the year), complete with their own fucking cereal that I ate constantly as a child. And their babies are called pufflings! PUFFLINGS!!! DO YOU HEAR ME MAINE WHAT THE FU

...OK. OK. I'm good. Look, this genuinely irritates the SHIT out of me, both as a hobbyist and as a professional. There are near 1,000 bird species that can be found in the United States, and the state birds are, honestly, some basic-ass choices that doesn't BEGIN to explore the incredible diversity of this taxon. And honestly, maybe if we changed up the state birds, we could increase awareness for these animals and their conservation stories and needs. There are so many missed opportunities here for us as educators, birders, ornithologists, backyard birdwatchers, and even Birdblr, to educate those around us who aren't as ornithologically-inclined. Imagine being able to convince a friend to go find the state bird on a trip some weekend. It could be a fun activity, and a fun way to get into birdwatching and the natural world! IT'S GOT POTENTIAL!!!

And look, I realize I'm not alone on this front. Various people have proposed changing up the state birds, including some more powerful professionals than I. If you haven't seen it yet, check out this essay series from the Cornell Lab of Ornithology that came out last year, which asks whether or not eBird could be used to identify better candidates for state birds. And I'll be using it for what's coming next. Because here's the thing. I'm tired of ranting alone in the dark towards nobody while my fiancee is trying to sleep about this. I need to rant to you poor people instead. And what's more...I want people to rant with me. If they want to. So...

TO ME, BIRDBLR!!! LEND ME YOUR BINOCULARS!!!

I propose an initiative to create a new list of state birds for the United States of America. And I'm talkin' EVERY state, baby! Even the ones that have fitting birds, as mentioned above. We live in a GODDAMN DEMOCRACY, and I say that we put this to a vote. So, Imma make a series of polls, one for each state. And yeah, that's 50 polls. Each will have a selection of birds, including the current state bird for that state, and I'll present the options in each case. The rules and selection criteria for the birds I'll present are as follows:

The bird has to be wild and breed in the state in question. No migrants, to accidentals, no introduced species (looking at you, South Dakota), no domestic species (looking at you, Rhode Island and Delaware). They're from the state, they breed there, and they're wild. Don't have to be endemic to the state, but they need to be found there, at bare goddamn minimum.

No repeats! Every state will have a different species! No more repeats. If there are any ties for states to get a given bird, another set of polls will be made at the end to determine which state will get that bird, and the second highest bird will claim the spot for that state. I'll try to avoid that for each state, but we'll see how things go.

There has to be a reason for their selection. For each of the birds presented for each state, I'll make a solid argument for their nomination. This also goes for any birds submitted to me for suggestions (and yes, I mean to say y'all can make suggestions if you want to for each state). If you have a bird you think would be good for a state, especially if it's your state, please give me a reason. Not that it's pretty, not that you like it's song, not that it "represents the spirit of the state's people" for no easily defined reason. GIVE ME A REASON

And for now, that's it! And hell, if this gets popular or demanded (and I'm saying this if, like, 30 people pay attention to this post), I'll also do the District of Columbia and the U.S. territories. And hell (again), I'll even consider doing other countries if that gets demanded, definitely starting with Canada and seeing how things go from there. And finally...if people want it, maybe even the Bald Eagle (Halieetus leucocephalus) will go up for debate as the USA's national bird. Although, not gonna lie, I think that we're stuck with that one. Still, there are other questions that can be brought up if this gets popular enough. For now, though, let's focus on one thing at a time.

So, hopefully you answered the poll at the top, because I am curious as to what you think about your state bird. And just to set this up, the first state on the chopping block is Delaware, which has one of the most offensive state birds, in my opinion. Because seriously. What the fuck, Delaware? What the fuck.

See you soon, hopefully! And happy birding!

------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Introduction to the State Birds Initiative

Delaware - Poll | Results Pennsylvania - Poll | Results New Jersey - Poll | Results (coming soon) Georgia - incoming!

[seokmthw]

in the fire | sung hanbin

⇢ pairing: hanbin x reader

⇢ warnings: dystopia au, zombie apolocalypse au, angst, some fluff, slow burn, major character death, vomiting, blood, gore, violence, explicit language, mentions of/implied assisted suicide (this is the best way to describe it)

⇢ synopsis: a deadly virus has broken out and left the world in shambles as everything you once knew gets flipped upside down and you're fighting for your life alongside your best friends. the three of you decide to follow a pair of strangers to a city that supposedly has an entire community of people, but you didn't realize the amount of horrors you would have to endure along the way.

⇢ word count: 19.08k

⇢ note: i am SO proud of how this turned out, it's one of my favorite fics i have written to date. the plot moves kind of fast but i feel like that happens with most zombie apocalypse media, so i hope you guys don't mind. if you want to listen to the playlist i listened to during the making of this while you read, here it is. i hope you enjoy :]

JOIN MY TAGLIST!

i.

“y/n, wake up!” the deep slumber you were in felt as if it didn’t last very long due to the familiar voice of one of your best friends, taerae, shaking you awake.

you groaned, stirring around beneath your covers, swatting his hands away from you, “what, taerae? i was sleeping so good.”

“that’s not really important right now,” his voice was hushed, a hint of anxiety laced within his words. it was extremely unlike him, and within mere seconds you were opening your eyes and staring at him, sitting up from your cocoon, brows furrowed in concern, “what's wrong?” you asked, observing him as he began rummaging through your bags hanging on the back of your bedroom door.

he tossed your largest backpack at you, “we need to go, within the next few minutes, actually. pack only the essentials.”

“why?” you inquired, swinging your legs over the edge of the bed and touching your feet to the chilly hardwood floors. you were greeted with silence, trying to get your tired brain to catch up with taerae’s actions of grabbing some of your personal hygiene products and tossing them on the bed next to you. 

you become frustrated with the boy, snapping, “taerae, what is going on? you can't just barge in here and tell me to pack some of my shit and then not tell me why.”

he stopped dead in his tracks, shoulders tense and a sigh slipping past his lips. he turned to face you, the fear he was feeling clear on his expression now. you searched his face for anything that might be an indicator of what it was, but the words he uttered were something you never expected, “there was just a nationwide announcement broadcasted on the tv that said the most recent round of flu shots contained a nasty string of some virus in it and it's mutating in people’s genes,” he explained, “the people who got it are going crazy and freaking out on everyone around them. biting them, clawing at their skin, swallowing whatever bits of flesh they can get their hands on. it's complete madness. they want everyone to travel to some hospital a few hours north of here.”

you couldn't help the way your jaw fell slack at his gruesome words. people eating other people? there was no way this was happening. you were surely dreaming, or taerae was pulling your leg and taking it a little too far; it wouldn't be the first time he's done something like this during your time being friends with him. you shook your head, balling up one of your shirts and chucking it at him, “stop fucking with me, dude. i can't believe you woke me up for this.”

“i’m being dead serious, y/n,” the bewilderment in his eyes and the nervous bobbing of his adam’s apple was hard to miss, “ask hanbin if you're really that skeptical. you know he would never seriously joke about something like this.” he took your backpack from your hand and began shoving things inside of it, motioning for you to seek out hanbin and find out for yourself. 

you pushed past him and out into the hallway, feet padding gently against the floor into the living room where the television was quietly humming in the background. you focused your attention on that, snagging the remote from the coffee table and turning the volume up. on the screen was your local news channel, an anchor braving what seemed to be utter chaos behind them. 

/reporting to you live from the streets of atlanta. since the news of the virus outbreak, madness has struck the city. people are in a frenzy, desperate to get out and find some sort of safety. it is highly advised you form a group with whoever you are near now and leave as soon as you can. i will provide you with more updates as they com-/

before the reporter could finish her sentence, someone came barreling up behind them, snapping their neck cleanly. you watched in horror as the reporter’s body crumpled to the ground and the culprit followed suit, crawling on his hands and knees to get to the exposed flesh of their neck. the culprit sniffed deeply before he began ripping their throat out, blood pooling near their head and their face quickly becoming unrecognizable. the look in the culprit’s eyes was nothing short of evil and you felt as if you were going to vomit just watching. 

“y/n, there you are!” the sound of hanbin's panicked voice caused a wave of fear to course through your veins. you yelped in surprise, quickly whipping around to face him, taking in his expression, a backpack of his own secured on his back not going unnoticed by you. 

this was real. and it was serious.

you felt tears well up in your eyes at the sight of him, still digesting what you had just witnessed on the television. he glanced over at the screen, catching a look for himself, and was quick to shut it off so you didn't have to see anymore. he approached you gently, but you were quick to cling to him, desperate to be grounded, to have a sense of security after being woken up to such intense news. you felt his arms envelope you in an embrace, his hands cupping the back of your head as you whispered, “i’m terrified, hanbin.”

“i know,” he consoled, trying his best to keep his voice steady, “i am too, but we can't let that control us right now. we have to be logical and level headed. let’s go find taerae and get out of here.”

you nodded, pulling away from him, feeling your heartbeat speed up in your chest at the way he wiped your tears away, the softest of smiles on his face. he tilted his head in the direction of your bedroom, and you followed behind him, shaking your head at yourself. now was /not/ the time for you to be dwelling on the crush you developed on him. at this point, you weren't sure if there would ever be a time, but you were hardly worried about it. 

you entered back into your bedroom, having seen taerae was almost finished with packing your backpack full of things. you thanked him quietly and apologized for freaking out on him a few minutes prior, earning a small smile from him in return, “i understand why you didn't believe me at first, so it's really okay.”

“so what’s the plan?” you asked, now taking the bag from taerae’s grasp and slinging it over your shoulders. 

“i suppose we attempt to get wherever they're saying to go,” hanbin answered. you looked outside of your window, catching a glimpse of the chaos a few streets over, a cynical laugh erupting from your lungs, “looks like that’ll be easier said than done.”

the three of you made a collective decision to at least try, because maybe you'd be guaranteed safety that way. you stayed clustered together tightly upon exiting the house through the front door, every sense on high alert as you kept your eyes peeled out for anyone you suspected might be infected by the virus. you felt as if your heart was in your throat, adrenaline coursing through your veins in a way it never had before. 

you slunk to taerae's suv, opening the doors to get in as quietly as you could muster, though you knew it would be harder to keep its old doors from squeaking too loudly. you hopped in quickly, desperate to get out of there and to a place where you wouldn't have to fear so much, and hopefully live in peace until this entire thing blew over. 

out of habit, taerae shut the door loudly, and the panic that sank to the pits of your stomachs was enough for taerae to kick it into high gear and speed out of your neighborhood as fast as he could. loud, gutteral shrieks from infected chasing after the car could be heard – the sound was unmistakable. you tried your hardest to keep your head down, to not look, because you genuinely felt like you'd throw up at any given moment.

but your efforts were cut short from the sounds of the tires screeching and taerae yelling, your gaze flicking up to see a body toppling over the hood of the car, blood splattering on the windshield and oozing from their mouth from where they'd likely just gotten done devouring someone. silence hung thickly in the air, the three of you processing everything that just happened.

“i just ki-”

taerae’s words were drowned out by the sound of you wretching in the back seat.

ii.

you never made it to the hospital. there was far too much chaos, and by the time you’d made it to a gas station, everyone had used up every last drop trying to top off before they drove up there. the three of you ended up having to completely abandon taerae’s suv, and despite the sheer amount of infected surrounding you, somehow, you survived. 

your new routine had been set in place for quite some time now. find a shelter, scavenge for supplies, and repeat for a couple weeks. then afterward, you would relocate. it was really the most you could do, considering every place you deemed worthy to make a hideout ended up being overtaken by more infected than you could usually handle. you were getting pretty sick of constantly having to move around, having no stability.

you missed life before the outbreak.

it took weeks for you to adjust to seeing so much blood, or having to kill infected who hadn't completely rotted away, some eerily intact despite the virus taking hold. it took an even longer time to adjust to /killing/. it was never something you imagined you would ever have to do in your life, but by now, about a year and a half later since the outbreak, you were immune to it and it didn't bother you anymore. regardless, you still longed for the days where all you did was complain about work and bills. 

having taerae and hanbin around made things a lot easier; especially hanbin. he naturally assumed the role of leader within your small group, and even more so if you had others tagging along with you. but just barely a week ago the last person of a group of about 5 you came across got bit and succumbed to the infection, leading to a huge scare of taerae potentially getting infected himself. thankfully, he wasn't, but the prospect of losing either of them to the virus made you feel nauseous. 

your tasks for each day were split up so none of you experienced extreme amounts of burnout. some days were dedicated solely to rest, though all three of you felt incredibly guilty when you did that. at any given moment, you could be attacked. or not have enough to eat. or even die. one thing you all had learned the hard way was that you were never guaranteed to live through an entire day. 

which led you to your current situation of trying to sneak around a nearby general store in hopes of finding some sort of supplies with taerae while hanbin protected the house you were currently inhabiting. since losing the last of your new group, you often found yourself wishing you could have at least a few more people so nobody was left alone. knowing that hanbin was currently by himself made you uneasy, especially since he couldn’t defend himself against more than two or three infected, or even other people, at once. you shook the thoughts plaguing your mind away; there was no time to think about things like that.

besides, you knew hanbin would be fine. he always was.

you gripped your knife tightly in your hand, allowing your eyes to constantly scan the aisles while you were searching through boxes in hopes of finding anything you could use. you had come to this place a couple of times since settling down a couple weeks ago, but it was nearly empty now. your food supply was running out at an alarming rate and there was only so much you could ration between the three of you before you would inevitably starve. 

the moment you came across anything that was edible, you could have cried. it was the millionth can of beans you had come across since you’d been traveling and you were tired of them being the main component of your diet. it was no wonder it was some of the only food left no matter where you went. people still hated beans, even in the midst of an apocalypse.

you carefully stepped over large chunks of broken glass to avoid making too much noise so you could stand next to taerae, who was dejectedly kicking around some garbage that was of no use to any of you. smiling sadly, you asked, “have you found anything?”

“not really, no,” he answered, “i think another group of people came through here and took a bunch of supplies we had seen when we were fighting that mob last week. bastards.”

you knew how frustrated taerae was getting with unsuccessful supply runs. admittedly, you were feeling the same way. it was hard not to have a temper. but, you were actively trying to make sure you didn’t let it crush your spirits too much. if you did, you knew that it would not only bring your motivation to keep searching down, but it would take a toll on everyone else around you as well. that was the last thing you needed, especially since things were looking more and more grim each day.

“have you found anything?” he asked.

you sighed, “other than a couple cans of beans and a box of cold medicine, i haven’t come across anything worthwhile.”

taerae softly whined, and for a minute, you thought he might throw a tantrum, “why does everyone leave only beans? that’s been our diet for what feels like an eternity.”

“i know, but be glad we find anything at all. it’s better than nothing,” taerae huffed in annoyance, but ultimately agreed with your sentiment.

you followed taerae out of the store, careful not to let the door slam shut behind you. making one loud, uneccessary noise would more than likely lead to your deaths, and that wasn’t particularly something you were looking for by any means. you both refused to leave hanbin on his own. you were doubtful he could survive alone, especially if he were to encounter a lot of infected at one time.

there was nobody who was capable of that.

you set off down the road toward your current hideout. night time was creeping up on the two of you, and while you were sure the you could take on a small group of infected together, you knew you couldn’t handle any more than that. you peered over to your partner, taking note of the sour expression adorning his features, and nudged him playfully, “a little success is better than nothing at all, you know.”

“i do,” he attempted to fight the smile creeping at the corners of his mouth, “maybe you’re just bad luck. every time i go on a run with hanbin, we always find so much.”

“hey!” you exclaimed with a light laugh.

taerae shrugged, a small chuckle emitting from his lungs, “you didn’t deny it.”

you fell into a comfortable silence, the only audible sound being your boots thudding against the pavement. you felt a shiver course down your spine; this would be your second time going through this apocalypse in the winter months. it was hard to ignore the fact that it was starting to get icy out and the wind was cutting right through your thin jacket and down to your bones. you leaned a little closer into taerae, who was practically grinning from ear to ear as you did so.

“i take it you’re cold?” though he was teasing you, his arm instinctively wrapped around your shoulders. you nuzzled closer into the boy’s side, soaking up any bit of warmth he radiated from underneath his hoodie.

“no, i’m sweating buckets,” you sarcastically remarked, completely unable to mask your playful smile, “i’m actually freezing. and i think it’s starting to rain.”

taerae tilted his head up toward the sky, his dark eyes scanning the darkening gray clouds overhead. he audibly sighed, and you took note of the cold droplets of water starting to fall on top of your head and seep into your clothes. he turned to you, “we’re only a couple blocks away from the house, let’s just pick up the pace. we don’t want our asses to get mauled by infected when we’re almost back.”

you nearly stopped dead in your tracks at the sound. it was almost as if taerae was psychic sometimes, and you were hoping like hell you were just hearing things. a deep, throaty growl sounded off behind you once more, and when you turned your head to look, your eyes widened at the sight of a mob forming behind you. you supposed that this was to be expected, especially considering it had grown darker a lot sooner than it normally did, but it still put fear in your heart. 

taerae gently urged you forward, “we need to go, now!”

even if the size of the mob was manageable, it certainly did not mean the two of you should take it on. the moment you were to do that, more were likely to start showing up and you would be doomed. taerae grabbed your hand as the two of you began to sprint, his grip on you preventing you from falling any further behind from your slight lack of speed. the rain had become heavier the closer you got to your hideout, skewing any good amount of vision you were hoping to have between your hair plastering to your skin and the weather limiting how far ahead you could see in front of you.

you cursed the month of december; it had always been one of your least favorite months, even before the outbreak, but now it was definitely taking the top spot for your most hated. ice had already begun to form on the road and sidewalks of the neighborhood and your boots were no longer gripping to anything. an intense jolt of pain shot through your knee the moment you lost your balance and smashed it into the pavement. you inhaled a sharp breath, struggling to regain your footing as taerae stopped to help pull you up. 

“they’re getting closer! come on, y/n, we’re only a few houses away!” 

you pushed your legs to keep going, no matter how much your knee was throbbing or your muscles felt like they were on fire. you desperately searched your surroundings in hopes of finding some sort of familiarity, and the moment you saw hanbin standing in the living room window of your hideout, you felt a wave relief wash over you. 

taerae pulled you up the front steps of the porch, making sure you got inside before he did, and kicking an infected back into the crowd and following you so it couldn’t force its way inside. hanbin slammed the door and locked the deadbolt the moment he was able to. your legs felt like jello and there was no mistaking the heavy breathing of taerae as he was hunched over, tossing his bag onto the ground. 

“did it get you?” hanbin sounded frantic as he shoved taerae’s right pant leg up, eyes scanning every inch of his skin for a mark of any kind left by the infected he had kicked back.

taerae scowled, shoving the older boy away from him with a smirk, “of course not. i would have felt it,” his gaze softened at hanbin’s solemn gaze, “i’m okay, don’t worry.”

hanbin nodded, his eyes flickering over to your hobbling frame as you attempted to make your way to the old couch you had been sleeping on since being in the house. you winced the moment you put any pressure on that knee, though, and within mere seconds hanbin had his arm snaked around your waist to help you get to your destination easier. 

you sat down, exhaling a shaky breath as you rolled up your own pant leg. your entire knee was already beginning to form a deep purple bruise and blood seeped from the small scrape that you figured you would have. you gingerly poked around the wound, mentally cursing yourself for losing your footing in the first place. 

“y/n took a pretty hard fall out there, i’m surprised they didn’t shatter their kneecap,” taerae spoke up.

a look of concern contorted hanbin’s face, “are you going to be able to function okay?” 

“i don’t know,” you truthfully replied, “i think i can as long as i nurse it or have some sort of support. i also think it would be best if we leave and try to find another shelter somewhere, we’ve definitely overstayed our welcome here.”

taerae scoffed, “are you out of your mind? there’s absolutely no way you can travel with your knee like that, let alone fight off any infected.”

“as much as i hate to admit it, i think y/n is right,” hanbin said, “besides, we’ve wiped out everything nearby that could possibly have usable supplies. there’s no way we can survive on what little we have until y/n is fully healed up.”

“not to mention, it seems like more and more infected are showing up around you here,” you added.

your gaze locked with taerae, who looked as if he could explode at any given moment. you knew he had the best of intentions, but it was crucial you left at dawn. sighing, you reached out and grabbed his hand, squeezing it in reassurance and muttering, “i’ll be okay, i promise. i can hold my own and as long as we wrap my knee up well, i’ll be able to walk normally. you know i wouldn’t say any of this if i didn’t think i could do it.”

taerae finally nodded in agreement, though his expression remained menacing as his eyes flickered between both you and hanbin.

“we better get some rest, we leave the moment the sun rises.”

iii.

it had been a couple of days since the three of you had set out from your hideout. to say you were exhausted was an understatement; you hadn’t found a shelter worthwhile to stay in, so you had to make camp in the most closed off spaces you could, usually in the woods. you hardly slept; it was far too cold to stay asleep for very long at all and if you did manage to get a couple hours in, you felt worse when you woke up.

you had to eat your supply of beans straight from the can because you had no way to cook them. scarfing them down wasn’t exactly ideal, and you dealt with taerae whining about it the most out of all of you. but, food was food, and you were lucky enough to have what you did. 

“if this map is correct,” hanbin interrupted the silence as the three of you continued walking down the same road you had set foot on, “this road should take us to the next town a couple miles out from where we are now.”

you felt a pang of excitement hit you, “maybe we’ll find better food there.”

“and somewhere a little more warm to sleep,” taerae added, the eagerness in his voice hard to ignore.

hanbin nodded, “we could probably make it there today if we keep up the pace we are,” he turned to look at you, “can you do that with your knee?”

truthfully, your knee felt like it was going to give out on you at any given moment. hanbin did the best he could with the little supplies you had to stabilize it enough so it didn’t hurt when you walked. it worked for the first day and half, but ever since your last stop to try and sleep, it’s been in an excruciating amount of pain. 

you still assured the two with a smile anyway, “i’ll be fine, i promise.”

as the three of you continued your journey, you couldn’t help but feel like every inch of your body was going numb. being out in the cold for the amount of time you had been was definitely not good for any of you, especially since the jackets you had were suitable only for autumn-like weather. snow had begun piling up on the first day of traveling, making things even more slick beneath your boots and the chill in the air to cut through every measly layer of clothing you adorned. 

you just hoped that hanbin was right about the town. for everyone’s sake.

— — —

“there’s a stream not too far from here, i’ll go and get some water while you change y/n’s bandages.”

hanbin was currently kneeling on the ground in front of you, teeth gritted together as he tried to keep from shivering too much while he focused on the task at hand, “just hurry back.”

with that, taerae set off into the woods where the stream could be seen from where your spot on a tree stump, his boots crunching the snow beneath them. one of the only perks about winter was being able to see through the usually dense areas a lot easier. 

you sighed, frustrated with yourself, “i’m sorry for setting us back.”

hanbin shook his head, “you don’t have to apologize, i know you wouldn’t ask to stop for the day if you were feeling okay.”

“maybe you should just leave me for the infected, i’m more of a burden right now than anything,” you half-joked, one corner of your mouth raising in a smile.

however, the boy in front of you didn’t find it to be very funny. his frown deepened and he locked his dark eyes with yours and grabbed your hand, his fingers chilled to the bone, and a seriousness radiating from his body, “i will never, ever leave you behind, even if it costs me my life. okay?” 

“the same will always go for you,” you squeezed his hand reassuringly. you would be an idiot if you didn’t admit the small smile he gave in return made your belly do backflips or the feeling of his hand in yours made you warm up just a little bit.

hanbin taped the remaining bandage together the best he could before rolling your pant leg down, careful not to roll his hard work down with the fabric of your jeans. you mumbled a thank you, standing up to make sure it was still secure and once you gave him a thumbs up, hanbin rose to his feet as well. 

by now, taerae made his way back to the two of you, extending the canteen of cool water out to you. taking it graciously, you took a few good sips before passing the object to hanbin. 

“what’s the plan now?” taerae inquired, scanning the brush around you in an attempt to find somewhere to set up camp for the night. 

hanbin shrugged, “maybe we should wait until morning to finish the hike to the convenience store. it’s almost dark now and i would hate to travel and have that be what kills us,” both you and taerae nodded in agreement. 

you parted your lips to speak, “let’s find somewhere to rest then, we have a long night ahead of us.”

— — — 

you desperately clung to hanbin and taerae, craving warmth more than ever. you were to the point now that moving hurt from how cold your entire body was. the small fire you had going earlier in the evening had to be put out before you slept so it didn't attract more infected that you wanted, so it was exponentially more difficult than any of your previous nights on the road or inside an abandoned home. 

morning began to break through the clouds in the sky, your surroundings illuminated by the dim light it provided to you. the snow glimmered all around you, and bad you not been freezing your ass off, you would have found it beautiful.  hanbin began to stir next to you, uttering a quiet, “did you get any sleep?”

“barely,” you mumbled back, taking note of the way taerae was snoring on your other side, sleeping soundly as if he wasn't on the frigid, hard ground in the middle of winter. you envied him, because no matter where you were, he was somehow able to sleep at least a few hours. 

hanbin lowly chuckled, “me either, but i’m glad to see it's going well for him.”

you peered up at hanbin through your lashes, taking in the gash just to the side of his right eye that was still healing from an encounter with a hostile group of survivors a few weeks ago. you reached up to touch it, gently tilting his head sideways to get a better look at it. you informed him, “it’s healing really well, i don't think the scar will be all that noticeable.”

“good, i’m glad,” he replied, and you missed the way his eyes followed you as you flipped around on your other side to begin rustling taerae awake. truthfully, you turned away because you were scared hanbin would catch on to the feelings you still somehow possessed for him, but waking taerae was also just as important. 

taerae grunted as he woke up, surprise evident in his face; almost as if he were worried something bad was happening, but when he realized it was just you, he relaxed almost immediately. “what time is it?” he asked, and you glanced down at the watch you adorned on your wrist, replying, “just barely after six.”

your morning was pretty relaxed after that. you took your time waking up and even managed to get another fire going so you could defrost yourselves before trekking back out into the snow toward your destination. your knee was feeling a lot better since taking a break and you were able to comfortably walk on it without needing some kind of support from either hanbin or taerae. 

your relaxation and bliss of the fire were quickly replaced with dread and hatred toward the cold as you trudged toward the town you were looking for. you still felt better, and your knee was much easier to walk on than previously, so you knew you'd at least be able to make it there while there was still daylight.

a soft gasp erupted from the boy on your right “what’s that up there?” the glee laced in taerae’s voice was hard to ignore upon him catching sight of gas pumps and the building next to them. 

you squinted to catch a better glimpse and couldn’t help the grin tugging at either corner of your mouth, “i think we’re here!”

hanbin chuckled, “you two sound like you’re arriving somewhere for a field trip.”

you nudged him slightly, the three of you unknowingly picking up your paces in pure excitement. you pulled out your weapons upon getting closer to the gas station, eyes and ears fully alert for any potential threats surrounding the area – infected or not. 

taerae extended his arm, quietly pulling the door open and holding his gun up in front of him as he walked inside. you were the next one inside with hanbin following up the rear, and once you were able to see that there was no imminent danger inside any of the rooms, you put your weapons away.

the sight you were greeted with was enough to almost bring the three of you to tears. there was at least four shelves of food and supplies that hadn’t been touched yet, which was extremely rare to come by at the point you were in with the apocalypse. 

“this has been well worth the wait,” taerae piped up, tossing a box of crackers, a package of hot dogs, and a few bottles of water into his backpack, “we finally don’t have to eat stupid fucking beans anymore.” 

“and we don’t have to hear you complain about it,” the eldest boy teased, mimicking the younger’s actions as he got a feel for everything there was to offer. 

you headed toward the back room, flicking the light on only to be greeted with a few makeshift mattresses the people here previously had left. you searched the drawers of the desk off to your right, greeted with a pad of paper and a pen as well as a few other items you found to be useful to the group. 

you tossed everything into your backpack and put it to the side, opting to tidy up the beds so everything was neatly arranged and each of the three of you had a spot to sleep. The padding on the floor was much softer than you expected it to be and you almost screeched in excitement when you stumbled upon a closet filled with thick coats. 

as you finished pulling them out of the closet, the other two were entering the room with grins adorning their faces. taerae saw you struggling to hold all the coats at once and came forward to help you, laughing at your misfortune when you dropped pretty much all of them on the floor. 

without a word, you began going through them and found ones in your sizes or at least close to them, sighing in content at the feeling of warmth they gave you once you slipped them on. you closed the door to the office, settling down onto the mattresses with the other two.

“do we want to stay here for a little bit before we head out again? or do we want to try and find a house?” hanbin asked, finally breaking the silence between the three of you and the analytical part of his brain speaking for him. 

you leaned back against the wall, your eyes trained on the ceiling, “i would be okay with either one. right now we’re at least guaranteed shelter, even if it’s only for a couple of days.”

“maybe we can stay for three or four days and see if we can find a house nearby,” taerae suggested. you all nodded, deciding that was the best plan you could come up with. 

you were just glad to have something go your way for once.

iv.

you stirred around on your spot on the floor, groggily coming out of one of the best sleeps you’ve had in months. you felt deliciously warm, sandwiched in between both taerae and hanbin, who were also just beginning to wake up. 

you smiled to yourself, propping your body up onto your elbow as your eyes scanned the area around you. it almost felt too good to be true, striking the jackpot with so much in one day. it was very rare the group of you ever had more than enough food to survive for a week, especially if there was more people with you, and here you were with everything you could have ever hoped for. you felt extremely grateful.

“why the hell are you up so early?” taerae groaned, flipping his arm over to look at the time on his watch before he covered his head with a pillow.

you chuckled at him, voice a hushed whisper so you didn't wake hanbin, who was still sleeping peacefully, “i don't know, i just couldn't sleep anymore.”

taerae huffed loudly before eventually sitting up, his hair tangled and messy and eyes still shut as he gained his bearings back. finally, he looked at you, playfully annoyed, and said, “i suppose you and i can rummage around for some more stuff while hanbin rests for a little longer. he never gets enough and he seems to actually be into a deep sleep.”

you peered over at the boy fondly, taking note of his soft snores and slightly agape mouth. taerae was right, and you did everything you could to be quiet before you left. you wrote a quick note on the pad of paper you found the previous day and left it where you slept so hanbin could easily find it if he woke up and you were still gone. 

you followed taerae out of the office, careful to not close the door too loudly just in case any infected had wandered in overnight. you seemed to be in the clear, and almost welcomed the crisp morning air as it hit your face and filled your lungs. there were a few other buildings nearby, abandoned cars as well, so you decided to scope them out and see what they had to offer. 

as you rummaged through a bag on the ground near one of the vehicles, taerae’s straightforward question caught you off guard, “are you ever going to tell hanbin that you like him?”

you were baffled, to say the least. you glanced up at him, mouth opening and closing like a fish out of water, before you finally managed to spit out, “that is not what i was expecting to talk about while we did this.”

“that's not an answer to my question,” taerae teased.

“no shit, sherlock,” you sarcastically remarked, deciding to keep a box of matches you'd found in that bag. you pondered his question before you answered him as you rose to your feet, avoiding eye contact and feeling yourself begin to blush, “i don't know, i mean, we’re in the middle of an apocalypse, i don't think it's the right time.”

“is there ever going to be a right time?”

his question made your mind start reeling. of course you'd /thought/ about telling hanbin, but you didn't want to ruin your friendship and most certainly didn't want to make things awkward considering you had to be around him until you either died and split off in your own ways. you thought he was way out of your league, anyway. there was no way he would ever like you back. you finally looked at taerae, a smug grin plastered on his face, and you stuck your tongue out, “quit being an ass.”

“y/n has a crush~” he sing-songed, skipping in annoying little circles around you and poking your sides annoyingly. you crossed your arms over your chest, giving taerae a blank stare until he stopped in front of you, his smile even wider now “you're blushing.”

you smacked his arm, earning a yelp from him, and hastily said, “no i’m not, it's just freezing out here.”

the two of you kept rummaging around, and after several minutes, taerae had done eerily quiet. you knew he was probably scheming something, because even amidst hell on earth, he always found a way to pull fast ones on you and hanbin. you shook your head, mentally preparing yourself for whatever it was he decided to do. 

but nothing came, and you were beginning to get worried. you had your upper body inside of another car, legs still dangling outside, after seeing one of the windows rolls down, and you were trying your best to grab onto a bottle of rubbing alcohol in the passenger seat. you desperately lunged for it, but to no avail. you decided to see if you could find taerae and make sure he was still alive and breathing. 

you attempted to shimmy your way backward out of the car, and felt panic set deep in your stomach at the feeling of something grabbing at your ankles. you tried like crazy not scream, but frantically began kicking in an attempt to get the infected off of you. a growl was able to be heard as it pulled you the rest of the way out the car, but you were able to get leverage and fully kick it off of you. turning around, you reached for your knife on your holster, fully prepared to kill it, but stopped with your hand gripping the handle upon seeing taerae standing behind you, mocking an infected far too well. 

“damn it, taerae!” you exclaimed, whacking him on the chest with your hand, “i could have killed you!”

he pointed menacingly, “but you didn't.”

“having fun out there?” the sound of hanbin’s voice broke the two of you out of your bickering, heads turning to see him leaning against the door frame of the gas station convenience store, a small smile curling up the corners of his lips, “looks like he got you good, y/n.”

you groaned in annoyance, “i can't believe you saw that,” you pushed taerae for good measure, “and you thought it was funny.”

hanbin shrugged, laughing along with you, “what can i say, i love a good prank when i see it.”

v.

you continued this little escapade at the gas station for a few days, more because the office was much warmer than outside and less because there was a plethora of supplies. all of the surrounding buildings ended up being a bust, completely ransacked before you even got there. thankfully you had the gas station, but it was only a matter of time before you would have to relocate. again. 

the three of you were sat in the office on the foam pieces you'd been using to sleep on, looking at the map smoothed out in front of you to determine your next route. you pointed to a small town north of where you were, but before you could say anything about it, you were pulled from your thoughts at the sound of voices and rummaging out in the main area of the building. you turned to the other two, eyes wide in panic, “do you hear that?” 

“yeah,” taerae was already moving to get up, his hand reaching for his gun placed on the desk beside him, “it sounds like people are trying to take our shit.”

“taerae, don’t” hanbin attempted to stop the younger boy from leaving the room, but his words went through one ear and out the other. his impulsivity never failed to amaze you. 

you sighed, shaking your head as he opened up the door, completely giving away your location to whatever was out in the main lobby. you rose to your feet as well, quick to follow him out and grab his hand in a futile attempt to pull him back and keep him from going on an unintentional murder spree. 

you were greeted by the bewildered gazes of a couple of boys, both very obviously malnourished and freezing, hands up in the air upon seeing taerae’s gun pointed at them. the boy in front of you two spoke up, subconsciously moving in front of the other one in a means to protect him from any harm.

“we aren't infected, i swear, we’re no threat to you,” his voice held both confidence and fear at the same time. you felt your gaze soften at their petrified expressions. 

you heard a harsh slap. “ow!” taerae exclaimed, turning around to face the eldest in your group, who had a grin on his face. taerae's hand gingerly rubbing the back of his head. 

he looked at the others, “you’ll have to excuse him, he can be a bit of a dickhead at times.”

you shoved taerae’s arm down, preventing him from holding the two at gunpoint any longer. he defeatedly sighed, tucking the weapon away into his pocket. he gave hanbin a scowl before muttering, “sorry.”

“that’s okay,” the taller boy spoke up, “we apologize for intruding, but we haven’t been able to eat for three days now and we were just happy to find supplies.”

“take whatever you want,” hanbin motioned to the shelves in front of them, a kind, gentle smile causing his eyes to take the shape of tiny crescents.

“thank you,” the boy opened up his bag, “i’m gunwook, by the way,” he motioned to the boy standing next to him, ”and this my brother, gyuvin.”

he smiled, giving a small wave, “nice to meet you.”

“nice to meet you too. i’m hanbin, and these are my friends taerae and y/n,” hanbin replied. he seemed almost giddy that you’d come across more people to speak and potentially form a group with. 

you cleared your throat, pointing your thumb at the office, “you guys look like you’re freezing, we found some coats if you want some.”

a wave of relief washed over gyuvin, “yes please, this is all we’ve had since winter started creeping up. i’m surprised we haven’t gotten frostbite yet.”

you led him back into the room you slept in, opening up the closet door to reveal the remaining coats. you helped him find his size, and when he couldn't zip it up from how stiff his fingers were, you did it for him, smiling at him afterward. gyuvin smiled back, but it held a hint of sadness. you didn't want to inquire why, especially since you’d just met them. 

he sifted through them and picked out one for gunwook. “thank you so much, really,” he sounded more grateful than you had felt when you first found them, “i’ve been really worried about what would happen the deeper we get into winter.”

“it’s not a problem. we weren’t going to use them anyway,” you looked at him as you began walking back to the rest of the group, “are you just passing through or finding somewhere to stay?” 

gyuvin made eye contact with his brother, as if he were scared to say anything, but gunwook gave him a nod of approval. he parted his lips to speak, facing the entire group, “we’re actually headed to seattle.”

“for what?” taerae inquired, brows furrowed in thought, “from what i’ve heard, it’s a dead city.”

gunwook chimed in, “a few people we met not too long ago told us they were going out to try and find others to bring back to this community they’ve built and sent us on our way. apparently they have a farm, horses, and a lot more supplies than people like us could ever hope to have,” he seemed so hopeful at the prospect of so many resources. 

“if you want, you guys can come with us. it would probably be a lot more beneficial to travel in a larger group anyway,” gyuvin offered, mainly making eye contact with hanbin since he was the one who appeared to have the most authority in your group.

he looked a bit hesitant, scanning the faces of both you and taerae, “do you guys want to talk about it?”

“yeah,” taerae was quick to answer, pointedly looking at the other two, feigning a fake smile, “we’ll be right back.”

the three of you locked yourselves away into the other room. taerae turned around, the expression on his face unreadable, but his words shocking both you and hanbin, “i think it’s a horrible fucking idea.”

hanbin scoffed, “and why is that?”

“these people literally just showed up not even ten minutes ago and you’re giving up our supplies and considering going with them to some community that we aren’t even sure exists,” taerae exclaimed, “plus, we /just/ lost the last of the other survivors we picked up. i’m sick of losing the people we grow close to.”

“i don’t know, taerae, i think we can trust them,” you told him, “besides, it’s better to have a larger group. you have to admit, traveling and finding supplies has been a lot harder with only three of us,” his shocked gaze met with yours and you did your best to reason with him, “they are extremely malnourished and only came to try and find food and you’re mad about that. what if it was us instead of them?”

he opened his mouth to retort something, but quickly closed it and shook his head, staring down at the floor. you gave hanbin a knowing look, a small smile on your face. 

he nodded, “it’s settled then. we’re going to seattle.”

vi.

as you walked with your newly formed group, you couldn’t help but feel a little giddy. taerae was right; you were still navigating the feelings of your other group mates dying, but you were still less anxious when there was more of you together. you had almost given up hope that there even was anyone else. 

taerae had remained silent almost the entire time you had been traveling. he was still nervous about grouping together with the strangers you had met the previous day, which you understood, but you were confused as to why it was suddenly a problem when you'd done it countless times before. another thing that bothered you was the fact that he was giving both you and hanbin the silent treatment. you scanned the other three in front of you, who were conversing about when they should set up camp for the night, and sighed, grabbing taerae's arm and making him wait until you were a few paces behind. hesitantly, you met your gaze with his, your voice as stern as you could make it when you spoke. 

“what’s your problem?”

taerae looked taken aback by how blunt and straightforward you were with your question. his bewildered gaze almost immediately went back to the scowl he had previously been adorning. he shook his head, his response short as he said, “it’s nothing, y/n.”

“well, you sure aren’t acting like it’s nothing,” you retorted, rolling your eyes at how stubborn the boy was being. however, your gaze softened upon seeing his frown deepen, “talk to me. this isn’t like you.”

taerae pondered your words for a moment before finally admitting his worries to you, “i guess i’m just scared.” “scared about what?”

“getting close to them and losing them like we did the others. they could be selfish, too. we don’t know a single thing about them and if we get in a situation where someone’s life is on the line, i fear they’re going to leave us without much thought,” his voice grew quiet upon his confession. you swore you could feel your heart break in your chest at his next words, “i can’t lose you and hanbin.”

you reached out and laced your fingers with his, squeezing gently in reassurance and forcing him to look at you, “as long as you, hanbin, and i are loyal to each other, that’s all that matters, right? all we have to do is back each other up if the other two happen flake on us.”

taerae’s eyes were glossed over in clear appreciation for your words, his grip tightening on your hand, “thank you.”

“you don’t have to thank me. it’s what i’m here for,” you teased, nudging the boy playfully with your shoulder. the smile on his face was refreshing to see after having him upset the entire day since leaving the gas station. 

the two of you caught back up with the rest of the group, who had come to a halt to scope out the area surrounding you all. the woods appeared to be significantly thicker, which provided more protection from any of the infected that lurked in the shadows at night. it would also be easier to make a shelter to sleep in overnight. 

gunwook turned, asking the two of you, “what do you think?”

taerae was the first to speak, “i think it’s definitely a decent spot for now. it looks like we might be able to have an area for a fire as well.”

to say you were shocked was an understatement. hanbin shared a look with you, a grin threatening to tug at the corners of his mouth. you knew the eldest was worried that taerae was going to stay in his funk for days on end, but the look of relief was enough to cause you to feel it too. the boy winked at you, asking the group, “should we split into shifts to keep watch over everything?”

“i’m not opposed to the idea,” gyuvin piped up, pulling his coat closer to his body. it was clear he was still freezing despite having a lot more warmth than when you first met him, “i can take the first one if you want.”

it was your turn to pitch in, “i’ll join you, it’s best to work in teams of two.”

he gave you a grateful smile. you honestly thought that he’s someone you could wind up being really good friends with. you just wished it didn’t have to be because the apocalypse brought you together.

— — — 

the evening came quickly once camp was set up for the night. hanbin and gunwook had managed to get a pretty decent fire going considering the fact that most of the wood you all found was damp or frozen from the snow. you all had welcomed the warmth with open arms.

since everyone was able to take most of the supplies from the gas station, the thin foam that you had used for mattresses the night before were now neatly laid out on the ground in a dense thicket of trees that had already formed somewhat of a shelter. It was certainly a lot better than what you, hanbin, or taerae had made in the past. 

one thing taerae was particularly happy about was being able to warm up some of the food you guys had. he even accepted the beans with a smile instead of turning up his nose to them, which caused both you and hanbin to giggle at him. 

the five of you sat around the fire, recounting your stories of what happened when the outbreak was first announced. taerae was laughing his head off, stating, “y/n really thought i was joking when i went into their room and told them what was happening.”

you threw a wadded up wrapper at him, “in my defense, he is constantly messing with me,” you looked at gyuvin and gunwook, who were laughing along with you, and joked, “watch out for him, because soon he'll be pranking you guys too.”

“what were you guys doing?” hanbin asked the two of them, and they sat deep in thought for a moment, gyuvin finally telling them, “i’m pretty sure we were staying the night at our brother’s house. if i’m remembering correctly, it was a friday, and we usually did stuff together after school.”

“yeah, it was, i think we were getting ready to go out to dinner,” gunwook added, “and instead of getting in the car normally, it felt like we were the main characters of an action movie or something. ricky drove like a maniac.”

you laughed at the image you had in your head of not only their experience, yours as well, “taerae ran one of our neighbors over when we were trying to get off of our street.” 

gunwook’s eyes widened, his smile stretched from ear to ear as he said, “becoming a murderer early on, i see.”

your laughter began to die down as the sun started to set, and your playful conversation turned into solemn ones. hanbin stared at the dancing flames, quietly asking, “i hope this isn't prying too much, but how did it end up just being the two of you?”

gyuvin sighed. you could tell this was a touchy subject, but he was willing to answer hanbin's question, “he got turned not too long ago. we got ambushed by the biggest mob of infected we’ve ever encountered since the outbreak,” his voice cracked as he said the next part, “he shielded us the entire time we were fighting them.”

“he ended up getting bit and made us tie him to a tree so we would have time to run,” gunwook’s solemn gaze made your heart twinge in sadness for them. you couldn't imagine losing hanbin or taerae like that, if at all, and wondered how your new friends were even managing to push through. 

taerae gave the pair a close-lipped smile, “it sounds like he was an amazing brother to have.”

“yeah,” gyuvin seemed deep in thought, a stray tear racing down his cheek, “he was.”

— — —

as soon as darkness engulfed the woods, gunwook, hanbin, and taerae settled down and drifted off to sleep, which left you and gyuvin sat by the fire to keep watch over the camp. the boy was sat across from you, his knees drawn up to his chest and his gaze fixed on the flickering flames that illuminated his face. he was practically glued to gunwook’s side. 

softly, he questioned, “hey, can i ask you something?”

you glanced at him, confusion painted across your features, “of course, what’s up?” 

he sighed. it looked like he was contemplating even saying something to begin with, but finally, after you assumed he won his internal battle, he asked, “does taerae hate gunwook and i or something? he seemed angry when we first met and i don’t want us to intrude on whatever the three of you were hoping to do.”

“no, he doesn’t hate you at all,” you reassured, which caused his shoulders to visibly relax. you fell silent for a moment, gazing over at the boy who was curled up as close to hanbin as the eldest would allow. he looked so at peace, which you rarely ever saw from him. you turned back to the boy across from you, “he’s just incredibly protective of the two of us. it’s really been only us together since the start of all of this and he doesn’t want to lose either of us, is all.”

“i completely understand that,” gyuvin replied, shifting to now lean back against the tree stump behind him, “i hope you never have to go through what we did, that's for sure.” 

“could i ask you a question now?”

gyuvin nodded, “sure.”

“i noticed this the other day, but you just seem to get sad whenever i’m around, and i wanted to make sure it was nothing i was doing,” you were hoping that you didn't seem like you were accusing him of anything, and he most definitely didn't take it that way. 

he offered a sad smile with his answer, “you just remind me a lot of ricky, is all. you guys are very similar in terms of personality.”

“well, i know i can't ever fill his spot, but i can still be there to support you throughout this entire journey we’re on.”

a small cry escaped gyuvin’s lips as he angrily wiped his tears away from his cheeks, “thank you, it really means a lot to hear that.”

once he collected himself, the two of you fell into a comfortable conversation, telling stories from your childhood and even some crazy ones of times where you thought you were going to die in the midst of the apocalypse. for the first time in a while, you felt content. at peace, even.

you hoped it would happen more often. 

— — —

the woods were serene at night when you didn't have to fear for your life. the soft chirps of the crickets, the occasional hoot of an owl, and even the crackle of the fire brought you a sense of comfort and security you hadn't felt for a very long time; since the start of the apocalypse, really. but for whatever reason, you just couldn't sleep.

maybe it was because you were thinking back on your conversation with taerae and the concerns he expressed about losing you or hanbin. or maybe it was the added stress of gyuvin and gunwook’s story. it could have been something entirely different, but you just couldn't doze off for the life of you. 

you huffed out a frustrated sigh, eventually sitting up from your cocoon on the ground and scanning the areas surrounding the fire. the only one awake was hanbin, taerae having dozed off again shortly after being woken up for his shift. hanbin insisted he didn't mind, especially since everything seemed to be relaxed, but you still felt bad he had to stay awake entirely on his own. 

he glanced over at you, gentle smile quirking up the corners of his mouth as he whispered, “can’t sleep?”

you shook your head as a response, eventually making your way over to his post and plopping down next to him, the fire emitting a slightly warmer flow of air in your direction. hanbin peered down at you, a fond smile ever so slightly on his lips, and you swore the butterflies in your stomach might give your feelings away. instead, you scooted closer to him, resting your head on his shoulder and fixing your gaze on the fire. 

you could feel the pressure of hanbin’s head resting on top of yours, his voice almost inaudible as he asked, “do you think anything will ever return to normal? like sometime in the future, do you think there's a chance things will go back to the way they used to be?”

a heavy silence hung in the air as you pondered his question, absentmindedly beginning to pick at a string hanging down from inside of hanbin’s coat sleeve. you could feel your eyes begin to gloss over as you thought about the nights you'd spend pestering hanbin while he attempted to do his coursework for college, or how you'd always give taerae advice on songs he'd written on his guitar. everything was so much simpler, so much /better./

“i don't think so,” you gave your honest response to him, “i mean, everything is destroyed and gone. it'll take years and years to even get rid of the infected, let alone rebuild the entire country to what it used to be,” a shaky sigh from you followed suit to your words, leaving hanbin to think on them. 

he clicked his tongue, “then i guess we’ll have to make a new normal, right?”

“i suppose so,” you hummed, “but how would we go about that?”

“i don't know, but hopefully we’ll figure it out.”

conversations with hanbin were always something you treasured. he gave you new perspectives on things that you wouldn't have even considered before and logically thought through everything. you admired him for that, and it was one of the many reasons you developed feelings for him in the first place. but you knew, deep down, that you wouldn't be able to live the life you wanted with him. you doubted he even returned your feelings.

besides, there would always be infected in the way.

vii.

having new friends that you actually got along with made a huge difference in your travels. there was a lot more team work, laughs, and supplies that you were able to get your hands on. it was arguably the most productive you'd ever been and the quickest you had gotten to know strangers. it felt like you were friends for your entire life. 

it didn't take gyuvin very long to catch on to your feelings for hanbin, and soon he was teasing you alongside taerae when you weren't in earshot of him. gyuvin’s antics were far less intense, and he asked you lots of questions about why you'd grown so fond of the eldest boy. he listened with open ears and was able to see the mannerisms that hanbin displayed easily after your conversations with him.

it felt nice to just gush to someone who would listen to you. 

you were currently attempting to break into a shed to see if there was any useful weapons inside considering gyuvin’s was starting to give out on him. you lunged forward, hitting your hip into the rotted out door, and it gave way easier than you thought. you coughed as dust and wood chips rained down toward the dilapidated floors. 

there was a lone infected inside, which was fighting for its life to even hobble over toward you, and you swiftly put it out of its misery, watching in disgust as it crumpled to the floor. you stepped over its now limp body, gyuvin's following closely behind, exploring the shed further than just standing in the doorway. you kept your knife out just in case you were to come across anymore, eyes scanning your surroundings in an attempt to fine something that would hold up. 

“i don't think this is a question i asked you yet,” gyuvin broke the silence, “but have you ever considered telling hanbin how you feel?”

you had to hold back from bursting into a fit of laughter, taking a deep breath, before you chuckled, “you and taerae are so similar it's crazy.”

you ducked under a cobweb in front of you, careful not to disrupt it in fear of a spider crawling on you. gyuvin mimicked your actions, inquiring, “why do you say that?”

“he asked me the same exact thing.”

you were now standing in front of a wall of rusted weapons. gyuvin looked slightly defeated, but instead of dwelling on that, he turned his attention back to you, “well, it's not a horrible question. i mean, it's better late than never, right?”

you just giggled at him, crouching down to open up a door on a workbench, “i guess so. maybe i will someday, when we’re in seattle or something. that way if he rejects me, i’ll have a home to go into and sulk.”

gyuvin’s cackle echoed inside the barn. you flared up at him, pulling the machete you found out from the self, pointing it at him jokingly, before you threatened, “keep it up and i’ll cut your head off with this and feed it to an infected.”

“hey!”

you handed your find to gyuvin, who admired it in awe, mouth slightly agape and a plethora of thank you's slipping past his lips. the two of you made your way back outside, meeting up with the other three who were attempting to get a car started, but to no avail. gunwook was turning the key in the ignition but had no success of getting the engine to turn over. 

“i take it this whole car thing is a lost cause?” you inquired, looking at the three of them inquisitively. taerae and hanbin had their heads underneath the hood of the car, inspecting the engine in order to, what you assumed, find out what was wrong with it. 

gunwook attempted to turn the key again, and while the vehicle made sound, it was more along the lines of grinding than anything else. he finally looked at you and gyuvin, “i think so, we’ve been working on it for an hour now and nothing has worked.”

“i mean, we’ve walked this much already. we really can't miss what we never had, right?” gyuvin reasoned as he attached his new machete to is pants. 

gunwook shrugged, “i suppose so,” he looked almost bummed out, “it just would have been nice to take a break from walking.”

hanbin shut the hood of the car, now gaining your attention. his hands were smeared with grease and a fine layer of sweat had broken out across his forehead. you blinked a few times, finally finding it in you to tear your eyes away from him. 

you parted your lips to speak, motioning to the road ahead, “guess we better get moving while it's still light out.”

— — —

you’d volunteered to take the last shift of watch for the night. you knew you wouldn't really be able to sleep anyway, so you didn't mind, and would rather everyone else get some well deserved rest instead. this was a common thing for you now, not being able to sleep. you just couldn't get your mind to ever shut up. usually, it was creating the most morbid scenarios, which would either cause nightmares or for you to be so paranoid you felt you had to stay awake. 

you supposed that's what came with life during an apocalypse, but it didn't make it any easier. you wished so badly that you could just go back to normal, or that this was just some cruel, twisted dream you could wake up from. but it wasn't, and you were stuck here fantasizing about a life you would never have again. 

the fire crackled softly, illuminating the surrounding area in a peaceful orange glow. you could hear the soft breaths of everyone, a slight snore emitting from taerae, and you smiled to yourself. seeing the people you'd grown to care about so still and calm brought a sense of comfort to you, and almost made it feel like you were at a sleepover of some sort. 

you heaved a sigh, drawing your knees up to your chest and resting your chin on your arms. you sat like that for a while, mind reeling with all the opportunities you were missing out on, and a stray tear raced down your face. there was gentle rustling next to you, and soon after, hanbin rose up from his place on the ground, a sleepy smile stretching across the expanse of his face. 

“i feel bad you're not getting any rest,” his voice was raspy with sleep as he spoke. he shifted his body so he could be sitting up next to you. he extended his legs in front of him, a yawn catching him by surprise, “if you want to try and get some before we leave, i can take over watch.”

you pondered it for a moment, finally nodding in defeat, and began to stretch out on the ground yourself. however, he caught you off guard, putting his lap, and murmuring, “you can use me as a pillow if you want, i know not having one isn't the most ideal.”

you could feel your heartbeat in your throat at his offer, silently nodding as you shifted your weight around, finally settling onto the ground and lowering your head onto his thighs, a content sigh slipping past your lips. you had to admit, he was right, and you didn't think you would be doing this when you first woke up that morning. hanbin pulled the blanket over you, enveloping you in a warmth you hadn't felt in a very long time.

delicately, he threaded his fingers through your hair, and your eyes fluttered shut at the contact. you sighed contentedly, mumbling a soft, “thank you,” to which hanbin chuckled quietly.

the feeling of his hand massaging your scalp caused your body to relax much quicker than you thought it would, and you were soon fighting to stay awake and relish in the feeling of it. before you finally succumbed to sleep, you swore you could could hear him barely whisper, “i’ll be here when you wake up, my love.”

viii.

“y/n, hanbin, wake up!” a voice pulled you from the surprisingly deep slumber you had fallen into despite the frigidly cold temperatures. an extremely panicked voice, though, the person’s hands gripping your shoulder and shaking you lightly in an attempt to get you to hurry. 

you shot up from your nest of blankets and hanbin’s legs, body close to taerae the moment you did so. your gaze locked with his, and instantly, you knew something was horribly wrong. he was quick to answer your suspicions, “infected, there’s a lot and we need to get moving,” hanbin cursed quietly under his breath next to you, angry at himself for even dozing back off in the first place. 

quick to get on your feet, you began shoving the blankets into your bag - rather haphazardly, might you add - your hands shaking from the anxiety you felt from the situation. hanbin remained close to you throughout the process, packing away the food you guys had left sitting out through the night. you glanced around, taking note that the other three were still within your line of vision, and you felt slightly relieved knowing everyone was still in a general vicinity of one another. 

a deep, rumbling growl resonated to the left of you. you turned, being greeted by an infected with outstretched arms haphazardly swinging at you, and his jaw hanging slack as he approached you. his flesh was missing in chunks around his cheekbones and his eyes were beginning to sink in from the disease. his hair was in matted, pale blonde tufts on his head. you’d never gotten the chance to actually see an infected’s features in tact like this before, and to say you were shocked was an understatement. he must have been freshly turned. 

you scrambled backwards the closer he approached, pulling your knife out from its holster on your pant leg. however, the pained cry of gyuvin stopped you from killing it right then and there.

“ricky?” 

the walker turned his head quickly at the sound of his name and you felt your heart lurch in your chest. the boy was attempting to run forward, but gunwook was able to wrap his arms around him before he could make it any further, “gyu, you can’t, there’s no saving him. you know that.”

you made eye contact with his brother, desperately searching for what to do, but his solemn and knowing expression told you everything. he turned gyuvin around, pulling him close to his chest, one of his hands holding the back of his head as he sobbed, “don’t look, okay?”

to ensure you didn’t overthink what you were about to do, you swung your knife forward, sinking it deep into the side of ricky’s neck. he sputtered loudly, dark crimson blood spraying out from the wound and onto your hand and sleeve of your jacket, some of it speckling on your face in the process. you twisted the knife and pressed your boot to his chest to shove him away as he fell, throwing your bag onto your back in a haste. 

“come on, there’s more following in behind him,” hanbin grabbed onto your arm the moment you hesitated, realizing just exactly what you had done. 

it wasn’t supposed to be difficult killing infected, yet here you were.

you followed behind him, meeting up with the rest of the group before everyone began to run on the same road you had been following to seattle. none of you really had time to take in everything that had happened in the past five minutes due to the large mob following hot on your trail, their wicked screams echoing through the empty fields that surrounded you. 

your breathing was erratic, legs and lungs both burning from the amount of energy you were putting into getting away from them. the road was slick with thick ice and it made it difficult to get any sort of traction. over the yelling, you were able to make out taerae’s voice, “keep an eye out for any kind of shelter!”

you squinted, scanning for anything up ahead that could prove useful to the group of you. however, gunwook was the first to notice something, “right over there! it looks like an old farmhouse!”

you took a sharp turn onto the gravel driveway that led up to quite a tucked away house, pushing your legs to go faster. the sooner you got there, the better it was for the group overall. the mob behind you was starting to lessen the more you ran, thankfully, and by time you got to the front door the five of you only had to kill a few before you could stop and catch your breath. 

nobody hesitated to go inside, careful to clear each room and make sure infected hadn’t wandered in. taerae rounded the corner of the kitchen, announcing, “i think we’re safe for now. we should probably rest for a minute before we leave again.”

“would it hurt to explore? see what this place has to offer?” gyuvin asked, the tremble in his voice hard to miss as he spoke. tears stained his face, streaked through the layers of dirt caked on his cheeks and revealing the pale skin beneath it. he was suffering, and rightfully upset, so you knew there was no consoling him until he was able to calm down and have some time to just himself. 

hanbin gauged everyone’s reactions, eyes resting on your blood splattered face, gaze softening. he parted his chapped lips, stating, “honestly, depending on what’s here, we could always stay for a few days and actually think of a better plan instead of just winging it and something like this happening again.”

“i’d have to agree on this one,” gunwook replied, “i don't want something like that to ever happen again, really.”

everyone wordlessly began to rummage around in the house, searching for anything that could be useful. you took note of how clean the place was despite the apocalypse occurring in the outside world. you turned into the bathroom, twisting the knob of the faucet on as a joke, only to be pleasantly surprised at the sound of running water. “guys! the water here works!” you called, dipping your finger under the stream, excitement bubbling into the pit of your belly, “and it’s warm!”

“the pantries and fridge are stocked full of food as well,” hanbin piped up, the excitement evident in his voice, “and there’s power? this place is loaded!”

“the people who were here previously must either be out or newly turned,” taerae remarked. 

it only brought you to the harsh reality of what had just happened. 

your gaze snapped up to your reflection in the mirror. ricky’s blood managed to get smeared across your cheek and mixed into the dirt and grime that had made a home on your skin quite some time ago now. your hand was stained red and your sleeve still heavily damp with blood, which you swore you could smell, and it made you feel sick.

you hurriedly shut the door and fell to your knees in front of the toilet, wretching at the stench and realization that you killed someone’s brother, gyuvin and gunwook’s brother, and you had to live with that for the remainder of time you were with them. a soft cry pushed out of your lungs as you vomited again, completely emptying the contents of your stomach, and you felt you couldn't do it another time. you flushed the toilet and sighed, staring at yourself in the mirror once more.

a quiet knock was able to be heard on the bathroom door and you opened it, greeted by hanbin, who’s eyes were concerned and his lips were contorted into a deep frown. “y/n?” hanbin’s voice was soft, “are you okay?”

and you burst into tears. 

hanbin pulled you close, his embrace strong around your body. you were sure you’d collapse onto the ground if he wasn’t holding onto you at that moment. he rocked your bodies slightly, humming into your ear as a means to calm you down in some sort of way, “you did what you had to do. gunwook wouldn’t have told you to do it if he didn’t think it was necessary.” 

you tried like hell to get the butterflies in your stomach to go away as he pressed a quick, comforting kiss to the crown of your head. not when you had just killed gyuvin’s brother and you were reaping the consequences of that. 

you shook your head, getting ready to respond to him, but were stopped by the sound of gyuvin choking on his sobs as he sat on the couch. gunwook’s voice attempted to comfort him, “i know it hurts, but you and i both know ricky would rather be put out of his misery than stay infected.”

“i could have prevented this all, wook, that’s the problem.”

“don’t do that to yourself. he wouldn’t have let you stay with him no matter the circumstances,” gunwook reassured him, “let’s go see about a bath for you and clean up, yeah? maybe that’ll make you feel better.”

their voices faded away as they headed upstairs. you gripped onto hanbin tighter, fists balled into the fabric of his jacket, letting out your own cry. you wouldn't blame gyuvin if he hated you for the rest of your time together. you would be angry if the roles were reversed, so you couldn't even fault him for that.

“y/n, i think maybe we need to do what gyuvin and gunwook are doing and get you cleaned up,” hanbin was gentle with you, pulling away from the hug slightly to get a better look at your face. his thumb came up to wipe the fresh tears away from your eyes, and you found solace in how nicely he was treating you. 

you sat there for a moment, relishing in the feeling, before you pulled out of the hug to avoid getting overwhelmed with any more emotions, shrugging your jacket off to rid yourself of the reminder of what you’d done not even an hour ago. you sat down on the toilet after putting the lid down and allowed hanbin to get a shower started, your entire body going numb in the process.

at this point, you hoped an infected would take you.

viiii.

you felt unusually warm, though you weren’t complaining in the slightest. sighing softly, you shifted around on the mattress beneath you, tired eyes attempting to open but failing miserably. an arm was slung lazily around you, soft breaths of the sleeping boy in front of you the only thing able to be heard other than the rustling of the blankets.

you finally gained the energy to open your eyes, at least halfway, and you were greeted by the sight of a peaceful looking hanbin, his hair sitting beautifully across his forehead and his lips curled up slightly in the corners. 

your heart felt like it was found to beat out of your chest. You had cuddled with both him and taerae a number of times throughout your attempts to survive, but never like this. you were the only one in the room with the dark haired boy, eyes trained on his serene face and your stomach doing backflips.

hanbin took a deep breath, his eyelids fluttering open, and he gazed at you with a quiet chuckle. he parted his lips to speak, voice deep and raspy from having just awoken from his slumber, “good morning, sleepyhead.”

“i don’t think i’m the sleepyhead here,” you giggled, poking your index finger into his chest, “i was awake way before you were.” you paused before asking, “how did i end up in your bed, anyway?”

though he woke up with a slightly playful demeanor, it quickly faded with a frown that tugged harshly at his lips, his brows creased and his eyes searching yours, “i figured you were too out of it to remember. you had a really rough night trying to grasp the fact that you killed ricky. taerae had fallen asleep relatively early and i just offered for you to sleep in here so you didn’t have to be alone.”

you were so caught up in the bliss of feeling safe and warm you almost forgot about ricky. 

hanbin caught on quickly to your mood change and to the fact that tears instantly glossed your eyes over. he reached his hand out, calloused thumb collecting the liquid as it dropped down onto your cheeks.

“you did what you had to,” he reassured.

all you had to offer him was a sad smile, “it definitely doesn’t feel like it. i wouldn’t be surprised if gyuvin doesn’t talk to me at all, i know if the roles were reversed i wouldn’t say a thing to him.”

he opened up his arms for you, inviting you to snuggle deeper into his chest. you obliged, allowing the boy to hold you while soft sobs erupted from your lips. quietly, he said, “once he realizes you did it out of good intentions he’ll come around. i know he will.”

you nodded, trying your best to convince yourself that what he was telling you had some sort of truth to it. you closed your eyes and relished in the boy's embrace, fearing that he would be able to hear how loud your heart was beating while you laid with him like this. you felt his lips graze your forehead, his warm breath fanning across your skin as he said, “i have something i wanted to tell you.”

you opened your eyes back up at his words, looking at him inquisitively, “what's that?”

“i know now might not be a good time, but i just wanted to tell you that i have a c-”

he was interrupted by the sound of knuckles rapping against the door to your shared room, “hanbin?” taerae’s voice called from the other side. 

the door knob twisted and he swung it open, beginning to step into the room before stopping dead in his tracks at the sight of the two of you cuddled up together. his posture was still and something unreadable flashed in his eyes, his tone monotonous as he spoke, “apparently i’m interrupting something, but i just wanted to let you know that gunwook is almost done cooking breakfast for whenever you decide to join us.”

with that, he shut the door rather harshly in his wake, the sound of his heavy footsteps receding down the stairs the only thing filling the silence he left behind. sighing, hanbin was the first to speak, “i assume he’s in one of his moods.”

“probably so,” you agreed with a nod, “i’m going to head down and attempt some sort of damage control. maybe we can finish this conversation later?”

hanbin nodded, “okay, i’m going to change my clothes and i’ll be down after that,” he replied offering you a soft, reassuring smile as you slipped your boots on and opened the door. 

once you reached the dining room, you took note of taerae’s hostile attitude as he shoved scrambled eggs down his throat, his facial features set in a deep scowl. he looked up when you entered, shoving his chair back, the legs scraping harshly against the floor. the boy rose to his feet and stalked past you, spitting, “i’m going on a walk.”

“you can’t go alone, it’s too dangerous,” gunwook called out in an attempt to get taerae to stay within the confines of the farmhouse. 

taerae scoffed, “i don’t think i fucking asked.”

he stepped out onto the front porch and began walking down the gravel driveway, his hands shoved into his pockets as he did so. you heaved a sigh, “i’ll go with him. i think it’s me he’s upset with anyway.”

“just be safe, we can’t afford to lose anyone,” gyuvin’s voice was quiet, but you still gave him an appreciative smile before following taerae out the door. 

you broke into a jog to catch up with his long stride, finally managing to walk beside him. you grabbed his arm, stopping him in his tracks. searching his eyes, you asked, “what’s wrong? did i do something?”

a look of annoyance adorned his face as he shook your hand away, “when i said i was going on a walk, i meant /without you/.” he started walking again, this time his pace much quicker than before in an attempt to get you to go back to the house. however, you were just as stubborn as he was. you stood your ground and continued following him.

“i don’t think it’s very fair for you to be in a pissy mood with everyone and not give a reason as to why,” you snapped, now gaining his full attention as he whipped around to face you, anger evident in his eyes. 

“you’re joking, right? /i’m/ the one being unfair?” he scoffed, “that’s rich coming from you, y/n.”

you gave him a dry laugh, rolling your eyes in the process, “i don’t even know what i did.”

“go ask your new boyfriend, i’m sure he could know.”

“so that’s what you’re upset about? we literally just shared a bed,” your futile attempt to reason with him went in one ear and out the other as he turned his back to you again and trudged onto a path in the woods, his fists balled up beside him. 

he suddenly stopped in a clearing, his shoulders tensing and his head bowed as if he were contemplating something. he sucked in a breath, though you didn’t expect him to raise his voice at you, “i don’t think you’re capable of understanding signs that are put directly in front of you and it’s so fucking frustrating!”

“i genuinely don't know what you're talking about taerae, please just tell me so we can fix it,” you shouted back, “it's not okay to just yell at me and not give a reason why.”

taerae closed his eyes and took a deep breath, almost as if to calm himself down, and in a completely different tone he said, “i just feel like you and hanbin are excluding me. it's obvious you two like each other and i just feel like an outcast now.”

“first of all, i doubt hanbin likes me back,” you started, holding your hand up to hush him when he tried to interrupt you, “and second, i’m sorry if we have made you feel that way. i never want you to feel sad because of something i have done, so i will do better and fix it.” 

taerae nodded, “i’m sorry for yelling at you.”

“it's okay, if you have any other issues just come to me like this instead of getting mad and storming out,” you playfully scolded, beginning to walk back toward the house. hanbin was stood in the doorway watching the two of you, a fond smile on his face. 

taerae leaned over, whispering in your ear, “he's crazy about you, trust me.”

you blushed a deep red, smacking him on the arm, “stop it!”

“just speaking the truth,” he shrugged matter-of-factly, unable to suppress the grin on his face as he bounded up the stairs and greeted hanbin, returning to the dining table to finish up his breakfast.

you stopped outside, locking your gaze with hanbin's, trying like crazy not to blush or make it obvious that you were flustered. he was quick to ask, “is everything okay now?”

“yeah, he just needed calmed down,” you told him, laughing as you said, “i’m shocked we didn't get attacked by infected with how loud he was yelling.”

“maybe he scared them away,” hanbin mused. 

hanbin allowed you to enter the house first, muttering something about how you should have grabbed a jacket because it's freezing out, and you playfully bantered as you sat at the table with the rest of the group. you were across from taerae, who gave you a knowing look, and you had to look away from him.

it was comical to watch him try not to yell because you kicked him under the table.

x.

your group had made the decision to stay at the farmhouse until you ran out of resources. its owners never returned, never fended you away from their property or supplies, and you sure as hell didn't want anyone else to take it from you. besides, if you could be stable there for a bit, it would give ample time to rest and complete your journey to seattle when it was warmer outside.

spring came quicker than you'd hoped, but while the weather was still unpredictable, you didn't plan on going anywhere. instead, you build a functioning garden to at least try and sustain yourselves as much as possible, opting to grow some vegetables. you mainly took care of them, which is where you were currently, your hands deep in the potting soil in an attempt to move a few of your crops around to some bigger pots you'd found in the shed a couple days ago. 

your heart jolted in your chest when a figure crouched down next to you, but soon relaxed upon seeing it was hanbin, offering you a helping hand, “i always feel bad you're out here doing this on your own most days.”

“i don't mind it, really,” you shrugged, scooping up some dirt in your hand and patting it around the plant to stabilize it in its new home, “it brings a little bit of comfort, reminds me of the days before the outbreak.”

he nodded in understanding, helping you finish up what you were doing before he quietly asked, “wanna go for a walk?”

you weren't sure why he was suddenly asking this, but you could use a break to stretch out your legs. you you wiped your hands off on your jeans to shake the excess dirt off, and then ran them under the water spigot to clean them as much as you could. hanbin opened up the gate after you signaled you were ready, allowing you to go first and step down onto the path you used to walk down to the creek in the woods.

a comfortable silence fell between the two of you, the quiet chirps of the birds filling your ears and the cool breeze ruffling through your hair. it was peaceful, and you had to admit, it was bringing you a sense of happiness you hadn't felt in such a long time. 

hanbin stopped once he got to a clearing, settling down on a patch of grass by the water and patting the spot next to him for you. plopping down almost instantly, you quirked an eyebrow up at him, questioning, “is there any particular reason we’re here?”

while you expected him to say he just wanted to make sure you were giving yourself a break, he surprised you by answering, “yeah, actually, there is.”

you cocked your head to the side, silently urging him to go on. he nervously swallowed, finally turning to face you, a sudden confidence dancing in his dark irises, “you know that conversation we were having a couple weeks ago before taerae threw his tantrum?”

“yes?” you answered hesitantly, not entirely sure where he was wanting to go with this. you felt the butterflies in your belly begin to dance when you took note of the way his eyes briefly flickered down to your lips, but it was over as soon as it happened. 

“well, um, i just wanted to finish that conversation, because it's been bothering me for a while and i just need to get this out.”

his burning gaze met yours, a fond smile curling up the corners of his mouth. you could feel your heart begin to beat in your chest, praying to god he couldn't tell how visibly flustered you were. he reached his hand up to brush a strand of your hair out of your face, parting his lips to speak, “i have a crush on you, y/n, i have for a while.”

while it was a simple confession, it was something you would treasure for the rest of your life. it was a breath of fresh air amidst chaos and fear, something that made you feel like you were floating for the first time since the outbreak. you felt stupid smiling so big, but to mask your hint of embarrassment, you told him, “i have a crush on you too, bin. i feel like it's been obvious.”

“not really,” he said, “i could kind of pick up little hints, but it was nothing too major. you honestly held it in well, i was worried you wouldn't return the feelings.”

“well, i promise i do.”

hanbin took your relaxed stance as a sign cup your cheek with his hand, inching closer and closer, finally muttering, “can i?”

you timidly smiled, feeling a blush creep onto your cheeks, “of course.”

without any hesitation, he closed the distance between the two of you, melding your lips together perfectly. you weren't sure if it was because he was hanbin, and he was perfect already, or if it was because this moment had been anticipated for so long by the both of you, but it was everything you could have ever asked for. he filled you with warmth and made you melt into his touch. your eyes fluttered shut, relishing in the moment before he broke away, his forehead pressed against yours, “i can't wait to do that more often.”

“me either,” you smiled, leaning forward again to steal another kiss from him, “i think i could get used to it.”

the two of you decided to scrounge around and look for any useful supplies before you went back to the farmhouse. you found a canteen and a gas lantern by the water, assuming someone had left it there - whether it was on purpose or not, you'll never know - and attempted to find anything else before you began your trek back up the trail to the farmhouse. 

you began laughing the moment you caught sight of taerae on the front porch a “thank fucking god” erupting from

his lips the moment he saw your fingers intertwined with one another. he said something along the lines of it being painful to watch the mutual pining and no one making a move. you nudged him playfully, admitting to him that he was right. 

your group would be leaving out within the next few weeks, and you anticipated everything seattle had to offer you, and you could only hope it would be as good as this.

it was close.

xi.

saying goodbye to the farmhouse was a lot harder than you hoped it would be. while you knew it was for the best, it killed you to leave running water, a thriving garden, and cozy bed to sleep in every single night. you knew you would have those things in seattle, but the remainder of the traveling there was going to be difficult, mainly because you'd all gotten spoiled on the luxury of not worrying about where you'll be staying. 

you set out on the rest of your journey early that morning, backpacks filled to the brim with supplies and plenty of food and water to get you through what you hoped would only be a week. you didn't run into many issues along the way, and had made an agreement to meet on the outskirts of the city if everything went wrong; and you hoped it wouldn't. 

the air was thick with humidity, and the feeling of grime caked on your skin wasn't something you missed by any means. you were filled with hope upon seeing a metal sign on the side of the road, and while it was rusting and filled with holes, you saw the words outlines clearly in white, highly contrasting with the green background.

seattle, 1 mile.

you gave hanbin’s hand a firm squeeze, peering up at him

through your lashes, and feeling tears sting at your eyes. you were finally almost to the place you would call home, where you could get as normal of a life as possible, and you'd be able to do it with your friends and boyfriend. maybe, just maybe, it was finally your time to have something really good happen for you. 

“what kind of food do you think they make there?” gyuvin asked, earning laughs from most of the group, and you all began to make small talk of what was to come, unknowingly picking up your pace. 

the sun was beginning to set, casting a beautiful glow across the horizon, and illuminating the sight in front of you. it was breathtaking, and making you all the more excited to finally get inside the safety of the gates that lie ahead.

but the harsh reality was, in this lifetime, nothing good lasted forever. 

something felt off as you approached the edge of the city. there were no signs of life to be found; you were greeted with empty streets and eerie silence. taerae stopped in his tracks, eyes frantically searching the map, a mantra of “no, no, no” falling from his lips at a million miles a minute.

“what's wrong?” gyuvin inquired, peeking over taerae's shoulder to see if he could figure it out himself, but to no avail. taerae folded up the map in frustration, shoving it in his back locked, and turning to the group to say, “there is no settlement.”

gunwook’s voice held a hint of worry, “why do you say that?”

taerae chuckled frustratedly, spinning around with his arms wide open, motioning to the deserted, crumbling city around you, “we went exactly to the place you said those people told you to, and here we are, with no other person in sight,” he quickly met gazes with you and hanbin, “we're completely doomed.”

“maybe we can try going back to the farmhouse, we were doing so well there,” hanbin suggested, attempting to bring some sort of level headedness to your current situation, but taerae was far from receptive to it. 

he began walking around, his behavior growing a little more irrational. he turned around, pointing at gyuvin and gunwook, who both adorned bewildered looks, and stated through gritted teeth, “this is all your fault, i knew we shouldn't have listened to you.”

“kim taerae!” you intervened, catching the attention of the dark haired boy, a glint of anger evident in his expression, “you are being a little ridiculous, we can figure something out.”

“no, we can't,” he scoffed, “we traveled miles and miles and miles to be greeted with nothing, i feel like my frustration is completely justified,” taerae allowed a yell to rip through his lungs, the sole of his boot loudly stomping on a bent “welcome to seattle” sign that had made its home on the crumbling concrete beneath you. 

before anyone could hush him, or ask if he was stupid, the resonating sound of infected filled your ears, but it was unlike anything you'd ever heard before. it sent panic shooting straight to the pit of your stomach, and it wasn't long before the filled your line of vision completely. 

hundreds of them.

the five of you began to run, desperately trying to stick together, but it was proving to be a lot more difficult than you thought. you heard hanbin holler a “split up” before you headed off into different directions, gyuvin and gunwook together one way, and your original trio the other. you clung to hanbin's hand for dear life, keeping careful watch of taerae to make sure he was keeping up. 

you were all too soon met with a fork in your path, and hanbin was quick to think on his feet, letting go of your hand and pushing you toward taerae with an apologetic smile, quickly telling him, “make sure to keep them safe.”

you let out a cry, “hanbin, no!” but it was too late, because he was taking a pipe and banging it on a dumpster nearby, gaining the attention of the infected that had been hot on your trail, and pushing his legs to move him faster down the alley and out of your line of vision. 

you attempted to run after him, but taerae grabbed your arm and pulled you back. you shook yourself from his grasp, screaming through your tears, “we can't leave him, taerae,” a sob raking over your body, “please!”

“hanbin will be fine, y/n, he always is,” taerae reasoned with you, “he'll make it back to us and you know it.”

before you could argue with him anymore, taerae was grabbing your arm again and dragging you along with him, attempting to find the edge of the city again. your legs were burning with each push you made to keep running, and by time you finally made it to a clearing, your lungs felt like they could collapse at any given moment. 

you desperately looked around, trying to find hanbin, or gyuvin and gunwook, and your eyes finally settled on the trembling figures of the two brothers on the ground up ahead, panting hard and trembling from the realization of the events that just occurred. 

you caught up to them, but before you could say anything, you turned around to face taerae, finally allowing the rage you'd managed to keep at bay during that mess to unleash itself on him, “i cannot believe you would put our whole group on jeopardy like that,” you stepped toward him, palms of your hands meeting his chest and shoving him backwards, “you made hanbin feel like he had no choice but to sacrifice himself so we could live, you know that right?” 

taerae’s mouth opened and closed like a fish out of water, not knowing what at all to say to you. scoffing, you said, “you are so fuckinh selfish.”

with that, you stormed off, ignore everyone’s futile attempts of getting you to calm down. the three ended up following behind you, making sure to keep your remaining group together as night approached, and you eventually stopped and set up camp for the night, but refused to utter a single word to taerae. 

you could only hope hanbin would survive the night.

— — —

you and the other three waited on the outskirts of the city like you planned, anxiously awaiting hanbin’s arrival to your small camp, if it ever came. it had been hours now, and you were still not speaking to taerae, now having graduated to refusing to look at him. his attempts at apologizing to you were futile, because he knew sorry would never be enough to heal the ache in your heart and the constant worrying on your mind.

as the morning sun broke through the sky, you sat in front of the smoldering fire, knees drawn up to your chest and eyes stinging with fresh tears. gyuvin was sat down next to you, his hand rubbing your back in a comforting way, his presence greatly appreciated, but you had a hard time croaking anything out.

a flash of brilliant red came into your vision, causing you to finally tear your gaze away from the ashes before you, seeing a rain of fiery glitter shimmering down from the sky in waves. you blinked a few times, wondering if your mind was playing tricks on you, but gyuvin had stopped rubbing your back in return for staring at the sight before you, mouth agape.

it had to be hanbin.

you began silently packing your things into your backpack, gyuvin closely following suit, but you were interrupted by taerae’s voice piercing the silence, “what are you doing?”

“what's it matter to you?” you snapped, managing to look at him, nostrils flaring in annoyance. he held his hands up in defense. muttering, “i’m just trying to watch out for you, y/n.”

you stepped toward him, teeth gritted and your patience with him wearing dangerously thin. you pointed to the color illuminating the sky, your words assertive, “that could be hanbin, and i’ll be damned if you stop me from going to look when you're the reason this happened in the first place. whether you come or not isn't my problem, but if you want to prove you're worthy of forgiveness, you’ll come with.”

you turned on your heels, back now facing him, and met the determined gazes of gyuvin and gunwook, who signaled they were ready to follow you back into the heart of the city.

you trudged onward, careful not to let the thudding of your boots draw attention to you, and glanced behind your back, taking note of taerae following suit. good.

it wasn't long before you made it through the entrance to the forgotten city, and you slunk against walls to keep a low profile in case a hoard of infected were still nearby. you felt your heart beating in your throat, a layer of sweat now coating your forehead in anticipation for what was to come.

another flare was lit, this time much closer to where you previously were. you dashed across the street from one alley to the next, taking note of the same dumpster that hanbin had hit before he ran on his own path. you figured following it wouldn'td hurt, and led your group onward through the maze of rubble, the stench of the flare smoke now filling your nostrils.

before you could take another step forward, gunwook grabbed your hand and pulled you back down into a crouch, his finger pressed over his lips before he pointed ahead, a bus in the distance, but a crowd of about 15 infected surrounding it. they seemed desperate to get something, and as your eyes trailed up, you realized it was someone.

hanbin.

he looked up, a wave of relief washing over his face upon seeing the four of you few yards away from him, and you fought back your tears as you made a cutthroat motion to the other theee, quietly creeping along the edge of the road, planning to sneak attack the infected.

taerae was the first to leap forward, twisting an infected’s neck with a sickening crack. its body crumpled to the ground, falling entirely lifeless within an instant, and it didn't take long for the rest of you to follow in his footsteps. you swung forward, your motions eerily similar to when you killed ricky months back, blood sputtering out from the infected and soaking through your clothes.

but this time, you didn't care. you continued your actions, the putrid smell of iron and rotting flesh violating your nose, but within a few minutes the crowd was gone, and you were surrounded by bodies on the road. you quickly entered the inside of the bus, noticing there was only a few seats left inside, and a previously made shelter from someone else having been made in the back.

taerae pulled the doors shut to prevent any other infected getting inside, visibly relaxing once he realized your group was safe for now. hanbin slipped down from the top of the bus, his hair disheveled, and exhaustion evident in his expression and body language. you moved forward to give him a hug, but he stepped back, shaking his head at you.

you felt your stomach twist in a knot, “hanbin?”

his next words were ones that would have made you fall to your knees if he wasn't standing directly in front of you, “i got bit.”

it felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the small space, the entire group falling into a dreadful silence.

you blinked back tears for millionth time in the last few hours, swallowing harshly as you met your eyes with his, desperately trying to see if he was pulling some cruel joke. you laughed, “no, no that's not possible! you're fine hanbin, you don't have to pull my leg like that.”

his frown only deepened, and he took a step forward, pulling the sleeve of his jacket up to reveal a gnarly wound on the inside of his forearm, the resemblance of teeth marks deeply penetrating his skin. blood oozed from the gashes, and the flesh surrounding it appeared as though had already begun to rot away.

“what are we going to to do?” taerae asked, and you almost turned around to slap him, but somehow managed to contain yourself.

hanbin’s expression said everything you needed to know. his next sentence was quiet, and had the nobody there been completely still, you wouldn't have been able to hear it, “i’m going to have to take care of it myself, i won’t let the virus take over. i don't want to be one of them.”

“hanbin, no,” taerae said, “we can't just let you kill yourself, there has to be another way.”

“but there's not, taerae,” hanbin’s tone was gentle but firm, “there's no cure, and i won't be able to handle being one of those disgusting creatures,” a tear raced down his cheek, “i have no other choice, unless one of you do it for me, and i would never ask that of you.”

you didn't feel like yourself as the gears turned in your head, before you finally asked, “can we at least say goodbye?”

his eyes softened, and he nodded in return. you let the others go before you, gunwook and gyuvin going first, thanking him for allowing them to tag along, and always making sacrifices to make sure everyone else was taken care of.

you didn't miss the sobs shaking taerae’s body when he went, their hug the tightest one you had ever seen. “i’m so sorry” moving past his lips repeatedly, and hanbin kept reassuring him quietly. the two had a quiet conversation, hanbin’s gaze intensely staring into taerae in what you assumed was advice on how to move forward.

and then it was your turn.

your legs felt like jelly as you collapsed into his embrace, his arms sturdy and the scent of his cologne having barely lingered on his clothes as you burning your face into his chest. you could feel him breaking down, and the two of you cried more than you ever have before. he pulled back a little bit, pressing a deep, loving kiss onto your lips, and you could taste the salt of your tears mixing in between.

he looked at you, adoration in his eyes, as he whispered, “i love you, y/n.”

your bottom lip quivered, and you were barely able to get out an “i love you” in return, relishing in your final moment with him. you shifted a bit, slipping your dagger out from the inside of your sleeve. you pushed it between his ribs, hearing him softly grunt in pain, and a quiet “thank you” coming from him.

he grew weaker by the minute, and you helped him lower to the ground. laying him down on his back and settling down next to him, your hand coated with the warm bloom spilling from his body. your free hand reached up and pushed his hair out of his eyes. thumb moving down to collect his tears as his eyes fluttered shut and the breath left his body.

your pained weeping echoed throughout the barren wasteland around you, and you wanted so badly to turn back time, to do something differently, because if you did, he would still be alive. you'd still be searching for seattle.

but seattle wasn't real, and the boy you loved was taken from you by the very thing you hated the most.

[discoveredreality]

intro post <3

don't mind me editing this like every single day lol

my dm's and askbox is always open if u want to talk <3

anons are welcome too <3

also if u want to make new friends i am right here pls say hi im fucking lonely😭

anyways

BELOVED MOOTS <33333 (everyone is tagging them and this is fun)

this in no particular order just whoever pops up on my dash or smth idk. not every moots just the ones i actually know lol. ok so

@im-ur-sleep-paralysis-demon THEY'RE AMAZING LOVE THEM SM IF U DON'T FUCK OFF BECAUSE OMG KJHLGJKFJHLKYFJHKJGL

@ma-lan13 HELP MY BESTIE IRL GOT TUMBLR OMG OMG. AND SHES ACTUALLY USING IT WTF?????? ANYWAYS SHES THE BEST <333

@bloophasarrived SHE'S THE SWEETEST AND SO WONDERFUL. HER PERSONALITY SPARKLES AND OMG SHE'S SO FUN AHHH

@marylily-my-beloved I LOVE HERRR WE HAVE THE BEST CONVERSATIONS. SO NICE AND EASY TO TALK TO. AND WHY DOES SHE KNOW ME SO WELL <3333

@im-just-here4853 my vent buddy omg we just vent to each other i love her so much idk what i would do without her <33

@im-on-crack-send-help TWINNING IN LITERALLY EVERYTHING. SAME MUSIC TASTE. SAME TASTE IN FOOD. IN DRINKS. IN THE WAY WE THINK. WTF. ANYWAYS SHE'S MY POOKIE I LOVE HER <333

@the-gay-skeleton-in-ur-closet THEY'RE THE BEST OMGGGGG and they're nice and cool and shit <333333 i'm quoting myself it's fine AND LIKE SO NICE AND GOOFY AND EVERYTHING OMG

@cubemagnet somene i met on a random post and now we occasionally team up to correct grammar lol 🤓🤓🤓 anyways she's amazing :D and everything she says is so iconic like isjflsrijglruhglsuglijrsg

@book-girl4eva SHE'S AMAZINGGGGG. IT'S SO EASY TO GOOF AROUND W HER I LOVE IT. SHE ALWAYS SLAYS SO HARD. EVERYTHING ABOUT HER SLAYS. idk if you'll see this but this is for u pookie <3

@mil-pinterest-sss-here-i-am ??? questioning why we're moots. but he's literally so nice. literally will be my therapist and help me w maths because that shit is impossible 😭

@dandelionflowery omg literally so kind and everything all the time. so fun fun reading their fics and doing shit together omg

@sweetwarmcookies16 OMG RIJGDJFGIJFGIF THE BEST I LOVE PLAYING GAMES TOGETHER AND TALKING AND EVERYTHING. ALSO AN AMAZING WRITER

idk brain isnt braining ill add ppl as i go along

moodboards made by my lovely lovely moots <3

so far i only have one here cause i forgot to link the previous ones whoops 😭😭😭

about me

i'm ari. she/her. nicknames welcome. go wild. dude/bro/girl/literally anything is also fine. i use 'lol' and '<3' too much. minor. literally the biggest procrastinator and so disorganised i dare u to find someone worse than me. i'm indian but i live in australia. bengali/north indian idk. band kid :D my pinterest is here. PLEASE DM ME IF U WANT TO. I NEED FRIENDS. IM AWKWARD AND BAD AT MAKING CONVERSATION BUT STILL PLS 😭😭😭

personality/star sign or whatever

according to the mbti test here i am an istp-t. i am also a cancer. i found out my sun, moon and rising signs and the marauders version and i wrote it down and lost it so then i redid it and i lost it again so i can't bother at this point someone help me :(

time zone

Australian Eastern Standard Time (AEST) i think?? SUCK ON THAT AMERICANS AND WHOEVER ELSE EHHEHEHHEHE ;LSDJFSFJIJFDJF;LJ

my music taste

i love taylor swift, conan gray, olivia rodrigo, sabrina carpenter and honestly a lot of other stuff lol. also love bollywood music.

favourite books and authors

i love reading and i'm usually a really fast reader lol. i love harry potter (fuck jkr tho), kotlc, chetan bhagat books, the inheritance games, agggtm, literally all of karen m. mcmanus's books, the divergent series, pjo and hoo, lorien legacies, the selection, powerless, soc, girl in pieces, dictionary of lost words and bookbinder of jericho, all the books by amish, and a bunch of other books.

dni

idk the usual?? if u think ppl arent valid or you're literally an asshole. honestly you all can go get stuffed. idgaf

tag games and shit

yes you can absolutely tag me. i love tag games and chain asks. sometimes i may not get to doing it but i usually will and it makes me so happy when i'm tagged lol

tags

i don't post that much stuff so i don't really have mulitple tags for my posts. anything or any shitposting or thoughts will be tagged #ari's shit. for asks it's #ari gets an ask?

fandoms!

i'm literally obsessed with drarry but i'm mostly part of the marauders fandom. i'm starting to make my way through all of the marauders fics. i love love love hermitcraft. i'm an ethogirl literally who doesn't love etho?? also really into trafficblr. i literally love six of crows so much like omg. desperately trying to get through the magnus archives im only 8 years late haha i also love kotlc sm. (team foster-keefe forever!) i'm low-key in love with keefe sencen cause omg. aaaand also a bunch of other shit but those are the main ones idk bro

i'm bored and this is too long already might as well add more so here are a bunch of userboxes :D

and that's all not because i have self control but because there is a limit to images per post 😭😭😭 i literally had to delete some of my aesthetic images for this soooo

all the above photos are not mine, i got them off of pintrest.

my profile pic is obviously from the makowka picrew here

the beautiful dividers are linked here. these are by @saradika-graphics she is a literal star these dividers are so good

IK THIS IS WAY TOO FUCKING LONG AND I KEEP ON ADDING SHIT MORE SHIT SO IF U ACTUALLY LIKE READ TO THE BOTTOM THIS HERE IS FOR U LMFAO ILYSM <333333

[sunlightmurdock]

Safe Zone | 0.2 | Jake Seresin / Bradley Bradshaw x Reader AU

Previous Chapter | Next Chapter | Masterlist

Synopsis: A team of elite naval aviators holding down the fort at the North Island Air Base while they wait for reinforcements after a virus sweeps the continental U.S. - only, it’s been three months and no one has shown up.

Warnings: throughout the fic - gore, death, violence and pretty graphic mentions of all things zombie related, love triangle, smut (18+, minors dni), angst etc. No specific warnings for this chapter

…

The summer heat seems to be getting to people. There was a fight amongst two men this morning at breakfast, Cyclone’s been walking around screaming orders all morning, and every civilian that Jake has seen today is seemingly on a mission to piss him off.

It’s been a hard morning, Jake’s already pissed off and Admiral Cain won’t get off his ass about getting someone to fix the leak in the roof of Block C.

He drops the bucket of supplies on the ground and starts towards the idiots near the wall. A group of teenage boys. One of them is hunched over with a taller kid standing on his back, reaching for the top to pull himself up.

“Hey!” Jake barks. The one being used as a human step stool turns his head quickly, eyes going wide as he sees Jake.

Jake watches him whispering ‘dude, dude, dude, dude’ and tapping his friend’s ankle to alert him. The taller one curls his fingers over the top of the wall and pulls himself up.

Luckily, he’s skinny and weak so Jake has already reached them by the time that the boy has pulled himself up enough for his chin to be over the top.

Jake doesn’t have much of a temper, and he isn’t angry - but he knows that this isn’t a slap on the wrist kind of situation.

Jake grabs a fistful of the taller one’s t-shirt and yanks him backwards. His intention is to scare them. They should be scared.

“What the fuck is the matter with you? - Huh? - Are you stupid or something?” Jake barks as the teenager lands in the dirt and scrambles, eyes wide, trying to push himself up. Jake leans over him, curling his fists into his shirt and pushing him harder into the ground.

“If I catch any of you idiots near that wall again-“

“You’ll what?” He’s interrupted.

He looks up and almost groans in annoyance as he realises who he’s holding. Jake looks back down at your terrified younger brother and drops the hold that he has in his shirt.

“They were trying to go over the wall, I was just-“ Jake straightens up and sighs.

“Our ball went-“

“Luke, go back inside.” You order. Your brother frowns at you and then looks to his friends. He sighs softly and the four of them turn to head back for the building.

“I wasn’t going to hit him.” Jake sighs.

“If you ever,” You step forwards and point a finger into Jake’s chest, narrowing your eyes at him, “Touch him again - I’ll-“

“You’ll what?” Jake taunts, copying what you had said back to you. He stands firm and tilts his head slightly. “Pull a knife on me? - Take my keys?”

You know that you shouldn’t really be stepping on the nerves of a man that could turn you in at any moment, but you’ve been fighting Luke’s battles since the day he was born and it doesn’t look like you’re likely to stop any time soon.

“I wasn’t ever gonna hurt him.” Jake reassures you, his tone still cold. Just like he knows you weren’t ever going to hurt Coyote. Sometimes you just have to do what you have to do.

“You don’t touch him again,” You warn, deadly serious. Jake catches his first glimpse of what Coyote experienced. Except, Jake can see your face when you say it - the fear in your eyes. “Ever.”

“Yes, ma’am.” Jake’s lips quirk up into a smirk. He’s never been one to show his weaknesses. He keeps his guard up and his poker face strong. You turn away from him, shaking your head.

“Hey.” Jake calls you before you get too far away. “What’s your deal?”

You roll your eyes and keep walking, “I’m not a fan of grown men beating up on kids.”

“I already told you, I wasn’t going to hurt him - and he’s hardly a kid, he’s taller than I am.” Jake replies. You hear him walking after you. “But that’s not what I was talking about - why didn’t you sign up?”

“It’s voluntary, right? - Maybe I just didn’t feel like volunteering.”

“Y’know, signing up comes with some perks.” Jake continues to follow you, picking up the bucket he had dropped as he passes it. It’s not that busy right now, most people are at lunch or inside - it’s too hot to be hanging out here in the middle of the day.

“Like getting to spend time with you?” You scoff, unimpressed.

“You should be so lucky, sweetheart,” Jake smiles, catching up to you and rounding, standing in your path. You’re face to face, about as close to him as you’ve ever been. He’s pretty up close. Neatly shaven, hair still perfectly trimmed, exceptionally clean. He smells like pine. “But no, I’m talking about the access. Level two clearance, almost the same set of keys I have.”

“You guys have level four.” You point out.

“Well, you currently don’t have any clearance at all,” Jake reminds you, adjusting the black baseball cap he’s wearing. He makes no effort to hide it as he looks you up and down. “Might get to see some pretty interesting stuff. Gotta be better than walking in circles every day.”

You stare at him. You’ve dealt with people like Jake before, and you aren’t phased.

“Outside?” You quip.

“Your family are free to go any time you like, if you wanna be on that side of the wall so bad.” Jake declares calmly, knowing that you won’t go.

“I don’t want to be out there. I just want to see.” You answer.

He shrugs. “So sign up.”

This time, it’s Jake’s turn to walk away. He likes you. Jake’s always had a thing for girls that don’t like him much. It does wonders for his ego to take someone that thinks he’s an asshole and just watch the tide change as they start to soften for him.

You glare at the back of his head.

Rooster’s day has gotten significantly more interesting. Rather than just watching cameras in the quarantine zone, that’s been passed to one of his staff and he’s walking the new medical team around the infirmary.

“So, Rooster, is it?”

“Yes, ma’am.” Rooster answers your mother politely. She smiles at him. They get to talking, actually. About how she wound up here.

About her son, the clumsiest wannabe pro-athlete in the world. About her daughter, the kindergarten teacher.

“No way — she was not a kindergarten teacher,” Rooster chuckles, shaking his head slightly as he helps her carry her paperwork back to her building. “She seems so…”

“Mean?” Lindsay offers with a small laugh. The two of you have had your differences. She adores you, and the two of you get along well now, but it’s easy enough to compare you to your brother.

Luke’s a very happy-go-lucky type person. You’ve always been a little more uptight. Well, from what she has experienced anyway. Lindsay’s always had a feeling that she doesn’t get you as wholly as she gets Luke.

Rooster grins, but shakes his head, “I was going to say tough.”

He doesn’t think you’re mean. You could’ve actually killed Coyote, that would’ve been mean. Stealing meds for your mother would suggest to him that you’re actually the opposite of mean.

Lindsay raises an eyebrow at him, “Have you ever been in charge of thirty five year olds all by yourself? — That takes guts.”

“Don’t doubt it.” He agrees.

Parents have always loved Bradley. He knows how to behave and was raised by a single mother, so he knows how to impress Moms. By the end of the afternoon, your mother is laughing at his jokes and letting him carry her new supplies back to the suite.

He sets the paperwork down on the dining table and smiles politely, “Alright. Well, I guess I’ll see you bright and early tomorrow, Doctor. Shaw.”

“Hey, Rooster — do you have anywhere to be tonight?”

He turns and raises his eyebrows, ready to help with anything else that she might need. He checks his watch and shakes his head, “I have to take over at the control tower at midnight. Not ‘til then.”

“Well, would you like to stay for dinner?” Lindsay offers. Bradley smiles at her, giving a soft nod of his head.

“Sure. Can I help?”

“Luke, you little bitch-“

Bradley’s head turns. He and your mother turn their heads to look at you in tandem. You freeze in the doorway. It’s clear that your brother isn’t here. His lips quirk upwards, amused.

Rooster seems bigger when he’s standing in the middle of your cramped family space. You cringe, not taking the time to question how or why he is standing here in front of you now.

“Where’s Luke?” You breathe.

“Outside? - Why, what did he-“

“Nothing. I’ll be right back.” You answer quickly, shaking your head. Your mother frowns and closes her eyes for a moment.

“No — I’ve told you a hundred times that it isn’t your job to discipline him. I’ll talk to him when he gets in. What did he do this time?”

Rooster looks between the two of you as you step inside and close the door behind you. He can certainly see the family resemblance. He takes a seat on the couch, feeling like standing between the two of you is just awkward.

“The idiot was trying to go over the fence to get his ball! — Almost got his ass handed to him by one of the dickheads in green.” You frown. Your gaze trails to Rooster, “No offense.”

“None taken.” He shrugs. In fact, his lips quirk up slightly and you frown as he begins to smile. He knows it would’ve been Cyclone or Jake that threw your brother around and, by how irritated you seem - he figures that it’s Jake.

Lindsay sighs softly.

She busies herself in the kitchen, ignoring what she was just told. She always lets Luke get away with absolutely everything - perhaps this is why you feel the need to discipline him. No one else ever does.

You swallow, then turn your attention to Rooster. He smiles politely at you.

“Rooster’s joining us for dinner tonight.” Lindsay changes the subject.

You look between him and her. It’s times like this that you start to miss having your own apartment. You miss the luxury of just being able to leave, to go home and to have an entire one bed apartment to yourself.

“I’m going to take a shower.” You decide. The bathroom is the only place around here you can get any privacy anyway. Lindsay rolls her eyes and hums an agreement.

Rooster hears the lock click behind you.

“Sorry about her.” Lindsay mumbles, she shakes her head softly. Rooster’s lips quirk as he shakes his head. He doesn’t mind the attitude one bit.

Luke shows back up whilst the water is still running. He’s bright red and sweaty, he comes in and chugs a glass of water before he even notices the pilot sitting on his couch.

“You’re Rooster, right?” Luke pants, pushing his soaking wet hair back off of his face. He remembers the note with the heart on it from two weeks ago. He looks between Bradley and Lindsay, wondering for a moment if this guy is here to hit on his Mom or his sister.

“You’re Luke.” Rooster agrees, nodding his head. “Heard you got yourself in some trouble this afternoon.”

Luke laughs, nodding his head, “Uh-huh. The little one is mean.”

Rooster grins, knowing that Jake would be furious about being called the little one. Lindsay grimaces and nudges Luke further away from her.

“Honey, you stink.”

Luke walks over to the bathroom and bangs on the door. Rooster almost stands up when you leave the bathroom. He takes one look at the furious look on your face and thinks he might have to break up a fight between you and your brother in the next couple of minutes.

He can tell you’re feeling cagey around here. You roll your eyes, dressed in clean clothes and scrunching your hair with a towel as you step past your disgustingly sweaty younger brother.

The air conditioning hits your skin and Rooster catches you shiver. He can’t blame you, he knows the water around here is freezing. Cold to the point that when he slept with with a girl on the first floor two months ago, he couldn’t bare to stand under the water for longer than two minutes at a time.

That was before Admiral Cain’s no fraternizing rule.

The room is tense when you all sit down for dinner. Rooster knows that the only person that wants him here is Lindsay, and that he’s also the only thing stopping the three of you from arguing right now.

“Stop looking at me.” Luke mumbles grumpily, twisting the pasta around his fork. Rooster lifts his gaze and looks between the two of you.

“I just want to know what your dumb ass thought you were going to do if you made it to the other side of that wall.” You answer sharply. Lindsay sighs.

“Kids, can we please not do this-“

“I wasn’t going to go over, I was just getting my ball-“

Rooster looks back and forth like he’s watching a tennis match as the two of you begin to bicker. His eyes linger on you, lips quirking softly. You’re cute when you’re mad. He knows to keep his mouth shut, but he’s on your side through the argument.

“Maybe you should get out more and stop worrying about what I’m doing.” Luke mumbles.

“Where would I go, idiot?”

“You could’ve signed up.” Luke answers back.

“Fuck that. I’d hate it even more than I hate watching you.” You scoff.

“Well, you could come with me,” Rooster says quietly, sitting back in his chair and parting his knees. He gives a soft, casual shrug. He looks between you and your mother. “See what it’s like before you commit to it. I’m just in the watchtower tonight, it’s like the safest spot.”

Lindsay looks to you and nods.

“I’m good. Thanks, though.” You reply.

“Can I come?” Luke asks.

“No.” You interrupt. He groans and sits back in his seat.

“Yeah, no - you’re grounded,” Lindsay agrees, shaking her head at her son. Rooster bites his cheek to keep from smiling. He has missed this normalcy. Annoying teenagers being grounded makes him feel like the world outside of these walls is the same as it was before. “And you have school tomorrow.”

Luke groans again, leaning his head back.

“You, though - you’re going.” Lindsay declares.

“Cute, but I’m not a child. I’m not going.” You reply calmly, standing up and clearing the plates, taking them over to the sink.

Ten minutes later, you’re walking silently across base beside Rooster.

“It’s not that bad - and you seriously don’t have to sign up after this if you don’t want to,” He says gently, feeling the annoyance practically radiating off of you as you walk to the control tower. You lift your head to look at him, remaining silent. “You could always sign up to teach if this isn’t your kind of thing.”

You stare at him. He slips his keys from his pocket, twisting it in the lock and pulling the door open. It’s as he holds it open for you that he notices the look on your face.

“Why would I sign up to teach?” You ask calmly.

His brows furrow just slightly.

“Because your Mom said you used to teach kindergarten…?” Rooster says softly, uncertain as he presses his back to the open door at the bottom of the control tower.

“Please stop talking to my Mom, it’s weird.” You step past him and into the bottom of the tower.

Rooster locks the door behind the two of you and follows you up the stairs, confused, “Why is it weird?”

His eyes are on the shorts you’re wearing, a tight pair of black athletic shorts as you walk in front of him.

“Because I’m not going to fuck my Mom’s new BFF.” You reply. You aren’t planning on sleeping with him anyway, but you know that’s what he wants. Calling him out on it feels like the right thing to do.

Rooster stops. You continue up the stairs without turning to look at him. His lips quirk upwards, smirking to himself as he follows you up the stairs.

…

@momc95 @shawnsblue @thedroneranger @cherrycola27 @zbeez-outlet @harper1666 @abaker74 @xhangmanlover @xoxabs88xox @cowboybarbie @ohtobeleah @top-gun-rooster @blue-aconite @laracrofted @bioodforbiood @basicchelsea @footprintsinthesxnd

[trollsedits]

Hello, I read your introduction. I heard that your Vietnamese are correct?

Can you do maybe like a brozone headcanon on how each brother individually would react to a Vietnamese troll or someone who speaks Vietnamese like a relationship? Sorry if you can't understand what I'm trying to explain, but if you know what I mean

Chào anh em là con gái miền Tây! Haha yes I am Vietnamese I would like to say that I hope in the future troll movie they would recognize V-pop (Vietnamese pop trolls) since there was a K-pop in the trolls movie world tour but I am just so curious to know what Vietnamese trolls would look like cause I would be a Vietnamese pop troll myself haha anyways yes of course I will make brozone headcanon on a Vietnamese troll speaker!

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A little background so Let’s just pretend: there is a tribe in the trolls village so far away that no trolls has ever heard of it not even Queen Barb or Queen Poppy has ever heard of them.

They are known as the V-pop trolls (Vietnamese pop trolls) but there’s not just pop Vietnamese trolls there’s also Vietnamese music genres that the trolls lived in V-pop village with the Viet pop trolls.. let me explain

You have the ca trù trolls: these trolls are also a Vietnamese genre of music their singing style is storytelling with origins in the northern part of the V-pop Village it mostly lead by a female trolls vocalist…

Then you have your Chầu văn trolls they are also in the northern part so they are close to the V-pop trolls village their style combined with singing, dancing and playing instruments with rhythm,pause and tempo.

There’s Vietnamese folk music trolls they fall under almost all of the genres that I mentioned

Then you have your cải Lương trolls: they are like a reformed theater trolls is a modern version of folk opera in V-pop village and they are spoken with drama and sometimes is so touching you would cry….

Again, all of these trolls genres all live under Viet pop village so they’re not separated from the other trolls genres there is more Vietnamese genres but I’ll explain more when I talk about brozone and meeting a Viet-pop troll.

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I’m gonna leave the relationship ship out for this part but I will definitely include it on the next headcanon that I write sorry about that I should have mentioned that first but it makes me so happy that someone is interested in my culture because I been embracing my Vietnamese culture a lot more ever since growing up in the US <3 and I say for all the culture don’t be scared to embrace your culture is a part of who you are and no one couldn’t take it away from you is apart of your heart your life style I think you guys reading about my trolls headcanon would hopefully let you all know a bit about my culture and I hope you all feel inspired to write your own trolls version of your culture Tag me if you do I would love to hear about other people traditions and culture <33

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John Dory:

-This dude has been traveling around the trolls village for the past 20+ years alone and when he came across a super isolated village he went to see what the village is about.

-when he came to the village he saw so many beautiful ancient decorations and he noticed that the trolls looked different from his own kind so John began to explore the village a bit further

-He also noticed what those trolls were wearing how some of them wore different outfits as he went farther into the village he saw how some trolls wore this long beautiful dress called a áo từ thân (it was a common dress in the north part of the Village) as he walked farther he also saw how some also wore a short version dress called a ao ba ba (which was common in the north) to remind you again all V-pop trolls and their differences Vietnamese genres all live in one village but there’s a different path way to get to a certain place in their village that what John Dory was doing

-As John headed back to where he came from he also noticed how some trolls wore modern Ao Dai it was so different than what he saw the other trolls wore when he was exploring the village

-As John came across to this folk soft like music playing as he saw this beautiful trolls wearing a modern áo dài playing a Vietnamese folk music with a instrument called “đàn tranh” Vietnames string zither he was so touch how she played it so softly he never heard anything like this before

-John came up to you and said Hi but he noticed that you don’t speak any English you understand some English but you couldn’t speak it very well

“I really like the instrument you played I never heard anything like this before.”

-You sat there and smile at him he insists that you keep playing that Dan tranh so you did and he immediately falls in love with the sound of it

-John will try his best to speak Vietnamese even if he doesn’t pronounce it right but at least he is trying and he won’t make it sound like he’s making fun of your accent or language

-He will try any Vietnamese food even if it sounds weird to him he doesn’t want to be rude even if it tastes bad he probably kindly declined it next time if anyone offered a dish that he doesn’t like

-he will definitely wear a male version of the modern ao dai he will never want to take it off and he would probably buy some for his little brother when he see them again especially bitty B who he misses dearly…

-Over the years you and John have help each other he helped you with English so you were comfortable with speaking it and you helped him with Vietnamese and teaching him about the culture and he so grateful that you offered him a place to stay and teach him about your culture

John: “Cam ơn Em (Thank You so much! [Y/N]) for taking care of me over the past year I’ve learned so much about your culture I will miss you and I hope I come back to visit you again soon!

Y/N: No,I should thank you anh John Dory you taught me English I will miss you a lot but please do come back soon anh! You gave him a hug before he leaves for his another adventure

-John will definitely bring some of your culture back to his brothers and pop village he would share what he learned and the instrument that you taught him how to played

-He will definitely cry when he leaves the village because seeing you and the others waving goodbye to him hoping that he will have a safe trip as he turn around he saw you in tears crying and waving goodbye to him hoping he’ll come back to visit you again one day he knows you’ll be there waiting for him to come back..

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That’s just the tips of the iceberg right that first part is when John Dory first came across the village moving on.

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This one for Bruce and clay is gonna be kinda similar in some ways where they came across a trolls like you when they hear you sing and played an instrument but I would like to say that clay would noticed how homesick you are and stuff anyways let’s get started shall we…

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Bruce/Spruce:

-After brozone broken up spruce had traveled around not like John Dory did but he was walking around to escape his life and never returned back to his boy band days he hear a very beautiful instrument playing..

-As he saw a beautiful female trolls who wore a Ao từ tuần who was playing a two string guitar known as the “Dan Nguyen” as spruce was interested so he sat down waiting for you to finish once you finish he would applause him being a heartthrob he would go up and start a conversation with you

Spruce: hey,Great guitar you got there I think you played such a wonderful job I never heard that kind of music because I’m Spruce what’s yours name I never heard any music like this before like ever I need to know more.

Y/N: Thank you! I’m [Y/N] and this guitar is called Dan Nguyen it been in my family for many generations my grandpa gave me this before he passed away his last wish for me is to play this and have everyone hear it is my grandpa way of showing other trolls our culture we lived in a very isolated part of the trolls village called V-pop. You smile sweetly at him

Spruce: I’m sorry yo hear that your grandpa passed away. (He dose not think twice or anything on how you ended up here all it matters that he really wants to know more about your culture)

-You agreed to helped him learn more about your culture and your music over time spruce change his name to Bruce because he wanted to leave his boy band days away and you were proud of him for doing that.

-He love every single Vietnamese foods that’s out there he will learn how to make Vietnamese food he will probably open a restaurant a Vietnamese restaurant some where on vacay island

-He learns how to speak Vietnamese pretty quickly every words he pronounced it was just on point if he ever step foot into the V-pop village they will mistaken him as one of their own kind because of how good his Vietnamese is also he could and will sing all kind of Vietnamese genres out there just to make you happy more like impressed you with his Vietnamese skills that he learn from you ☺️

-He will definitely bring some of the Vietnamese culture that you taught him back to his brother when he see them again

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Clay:

-After being cut off from the rest of the trolls during the bergens escape clay and other trolls were finding a place to stay as they were looking he heard something or more like some one playing a beautiful instrument.

-Clay was worried that the bergens will hear you as he came closer to you he saw you wearing a Vietnamese hat called “non la” and you were wearing a beautiful white plain Ao dai he mistken you for a ghost because of your outfit

-you also played the Dan Ty ba which was a traditional orchestra which made clay even want to come closer to you

-as he heard you sing Vietnamese folk music he really liked the sound of it he was worried that the bergens would hear you but it kinda sounded quiet when you sang it

-Clay got closer he introduced himself to you and you did the same

-Overtime you lived with the Putt-Putt trolls until you can safely make it back home or that what you hope but you became homesick over time you didn’t hate the putt putt trolls or anything but it was missing something that was apart of you your whole life

-Clay often noticed you feeling homesick and how you miss your family he would often see you cry or hold onto your “non la.” Also how often you would sit by yourself playing a sad note on your Dan Ty ba

-He would want to make sure you’re alright

Clay: hey, [Y/N] are you alright I’ve been noticing how upset you looked is something wrong is okay you can talk to me about anything?

Y/N: I’m just homesick, being away from my family and my village really takes a turn Vietnamese music and culture is apart of my life growing up I really like it here with you and Viva and the others but sometimes apart of me is missing

-As you got up and walked away crying clay felt very bad he knew he had to do something to make sure you feel safe as much as he wants you to go see your family again but he doesn’t want you to get eaten by a Bergens

-Clay would spend all his time despite being a licensed CPA he will spend his time reading and learning how to speak Vietnamese and more about your culture

-Like Bruce clay learned how to speak Vietnamese pretty quickly his pronunciation was perfect cause he spend all his time reading a book on how to speak Vietnamese for beginners

-He would also learn and also have the other putt putt trolls pitch in to cook/make the place feel like home to you

-It would take viva hours trying to get you out of the house as you finally agreed to as you came out you heard music not any music it was the music that reminded you of your home and your people you began to cry tears of joy and give clay a tight hug…

Y/N: Oh thank you thank you so much Clay you didn’t have to do all that for me but I really appreciate you all pitch in and took the time to learn my culture and my people my family would be so proud of me

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I cried when I was writing clay part because it deals with being homesick and I understand that feeling I live in the state when I go to Vietnam for a vacation when I had to go back I would spend the entire plane ride crying and brawling my eyes out so seeing a troll like clay who would go beyond the way to learn your culture makes me smile so much.

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Floyd:

-Traveling alone to start his solo career he came across to this soft and beautiful sound

-as he went closer to where the sound was he came across a ancient village known as V-pop village just like John did he noticed how each different trolls tribes wore different outfits

-But suddenly Floyd heard the instrument played again as he got closer he saw a beautiful girl played such soft instrument called “Dan bầu” is a Vietnamese string instrument but then it hit him when he heard you sing “Cải lương” Floyd never heard anything so soft and yet touching

-Being a sensitive troll that he is he can’t help but cry on how good it sound he may not understand what you’re saying but something about the rhythm just makes him cry for days because it was like a blend of Vietnamese folk song and classical music as-well

-Overtime, Floyd would learn Vietnamese his pronunciation wasn’t good but wasn’t as bad as John was but he try to sing cai luong and also learn how to play the Dan bầu but fail the others trolls made fun of him but you offered to helped him

-You gave Floyd a private lesson on how to play the instrument overtime he was getting pretty good and you were impressed with his skills

-Overtime his Vietnamese pronunciation got even better to the point he can finally sing cái lương you were impressed how much he has improved he thanked you a lot for helping him he couldn’t have learned that without your help

-Once he left the village he would take something special back with him which was a new skills and learning a new language all together thanks to you.

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Sorry if Floyd was short but I definitely could see him singing cái lương because he is the sensitive one and when you listen to it (Yep, it sounds super sad and emotional my parents always listen to this) and him being able to play a Vietnamese instrument it just makes it better

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Lastly, Branch:

-After saving all music kind from Queen barb with Queen poppy as all the music genres came together as one it only took him a second to see a different kind of trolls

-He saw you with your beautiful black hair and you were wearing a beautiful modern áo dài with your non la you were walking around shopping for fruits

-Branch would go to poppy and ask her if she seen any other troll like you before because something about you was different from the other trolls and their music

-One day he finally came up to you and introduced himself to you and you did the same he didn’t know how to start the conversation but you knew what he wanted to ask so you got straight to the point

Y/n: I’m a Vietnamese pop troll I know it seems crazy but we lived in a isolated place in trolls village we have different genres of Vietnamese music just like you guys but I’m a pop troll just like you guys but the only difference is that I sing in Vietnamese

-You would have to demonstrate to branch and sing Vietnamese pop music in Viet which he finally understood branch was so interested in learning the Viet pop style so he asked you if you could help him

-Branch started off not pronouncing any Vietnamese words correctly you didn’t mind because you know he didn’t mean at anyway to make fun of your language but still you helped him through it

-Overtime, his pronunciation gotten better and he was able to sing a whole Vietnamese pop song without messing up the words

-Branch learned so much from you and your tradition and he also hopes he can share this wonderful music and culture with his girlfriend Queen poppy and the others trolls in the village aswell his brothers if he ever sees them again

-Branch also adore the traditional outfit you put him in which is a modern male ao dai just like John he would ask you to make some for his brother aswell for Queen poppy which you happily agree to do

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Again, sorry if both branch and Floyd was short but I really enjoyed writing this and hopefully you guys learn a bit about Vietnamese culture I may be an American but being Vietnamese always and will be apart of who I am

Anyways, If you want me to do a part 2 I’ll do it maybe I can explain more about the food/fashion and the language barrier there’s so much to share to all of you in the trolls fandom about my Vietnamese culture and I hope you do the same with your culture I look forward to coming across to reading those 🩷✨

Also sorry for any grammar mistakes I’ll go fix it haha :^)

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If you want to request anything go to my profile and click “Ask me anything!”

Like + Follow are very much appreciated! ✨

[sukirichi]

Not me even as a hardcore Sunayn truther eating up the Ex-prince!Rin and computer science major!Tsukki roommates agenda. I just know they would have so many misadventures together. Hell, if Rin isn't endgame, I shall silently hope that you write a one shot of manager!reader x ex-prince!rin.

i have come with an offering of a ficlet of manager! reader x ex-prince! rin <3 inspired by this concept | pls note that this is not canon compliant to the dtd timeline !! or who knows. giggles. 1k wc

Rin lay in bed, staring at the ceiling as his patience wears thin. The clock on his nightstand read 2:30 AM, and Tsukishima’s voice echoed through the room, loud and relentless. The tall blond was deep into a gaming session, his shouts and laughter blending with the sound of rapid keyboard clicks.

“Dude, watch out for the sniper!” Tsukishima yelled, his excitement palpable. “Watch out, watch out! Shit!”

Rin rolled over, pulling the pillow over his head, but it did little to muffle the noise. He tried counting sheep, deep breathing, even reciting poetry in his head, but nothing worked. Finally, with a frustrated sigh, he threw off the covers and marched to his roommate’s desk. It took everything in him to not rip off his stupid headseat.

“Tsukishima,” Rin gritted his teeth. “Can you keep it down? Some of us are trying to sleep.”

Tsukishima glanced over his shoulder, a smirk playing on his lips. “Sorry, old man,” he said, his tone dripping with sarcasm. “Didn’t realize it was past your bedtime.”

Rin clenched his jaw, resisting the urge to snap back. He wasn’t even that old. The blond fucker was just a genius who got into university earlier than everyone else, a fact he boasted of proudly with his nose pointed north. Ass, Rin wanted to say, I used to be a Prince. Don’t think anything can compare with that.

Instead, the words that come out of his mouth are different. Taking a deep breath, Rin pinched the bridge of nose. “Just... try to be quieter, okay?”

Tsukishima chuckled, turning back to his game. “Yeah, yeah. I’ll keep it down.”

Rin sighed, knowing Tsukishima’s version of “quiet” would still be far from silent. Resigned, he crossed his room and picked up his hoodie slung from the back of his chair, keys spinning on his finger, and walked out. The way to the café he worked at was something he could navigate with his eyes closed.

He pushed the door open, the familiar bell above the entrance chiming softly. Instantly, he was greeted by the comforting aroma of freshly brewed coffee – the scent fainter now that fewer people came. It wasn’t his shift tonight, either, but he needed the caffeine boost and a quiet place to finish his essay.

At least, that’s what he tells himself. It’s really just an excuse to see you – his pretty manager who never failed to make his heart skip a beat. It’s silly, really.

He’s pushing his thirties and has been divorced already. Yet each time you smiled at him, calling him Rin (because he’s just Rin now, no longer Rintaro), he feels stupid for the way his body reacts like he’s a teenager all over again.

You don’t notice him when he enters, something he’s grateful for. He clutches his book and makes his way to a secluded a corner, avoiding the counter where you stood. He caught glimpses of you out of the corner of his eye – your surprised expression upon seeing him making him smile inwardly. Damn, he thinks, hiding his reddened cheeks under his hoodie, you didn’t have to look so happy seeing him.

But he guessed you were just like that. Intimidating and scary at first since you’d rarely smiled, but once he got to know you, you were actually sweet under that tough exterior. Manager personality, maybe. You couldn’t have been one if you weren’t fierce in your own way.

Settling into his seat, he pulls out his notebook and pen. A few minutes passed, the soft hum of the café filling the silence and helping him write down more words in the essay he had to turn in for this semester. Then, out of nowhere, a cup of coffee slid gently onto the table in front of him. He looked up, meeting your eyes – tired, sleepy, and a little too warm under the dim lights.

“On the house,” you say, a small smile tugging at your lips before you return to the counter.

Just like that, he begins to feel warm all over. He wraps his hands around the cup, feeling the warmth seep into his fingers. Every now and then, he flickers his gaze back to you, the taste of the coffee and the memory of your smile etched into his brain.

He stays a little bit more after that. He helps you close up and wipe everything, a silent murmur of ‘thanks’ passed between each other. And because he can’t help himself, he walks you home – to an apartment a few minutes away from his university. Neither of you say a word, but none was needed. The silence that stretches is comfortable, and he respects that you’re too exhausted to start conversation.

Briefly, Rin wonders when was the last time he’d experienced such a peaceful moment like this. And when you turn to him, jut your thumb to your place, farewells are exchanged under shy smiles.

He likes you, that much he knows. It’s hard not to. But there’s one thing harder than not liking you, and it’s keeping his little crush just the way it is – an innocent, silly little crush.

On the way home, he kicks rocks on the pavements and feels the weight of his ex-wife’s Polaroid hidden in his wallet, the remnants of a life long gone carried with him everywhere he goes.

Even now, on the other side of the world, in a country that doesn’t speak his language and where he’s truly a nobody, Rin keeps the last promise he’d made to her before he’d left. There’d be no one else after you, he’d once said, and he sighs, picturing his pretty manager’s even prettier smile – the type where your eyes wrinkle at the corner, and your cheeks rise up.

Foolishly, he looks at your silhouette from the window. You’ve removed your scarf and was now stretching your arms above your head, your figure disappearing as you plop down on your bed. You’re so pretty, it hurts, and he can’t fathom if he likes how you know nothing about him at all.

[valeriefauxnom]

Another Stealth Edit in Dragalia Lost!

So, as I unfortunately cannot find the vocal lines for, Leonidas was known in his Gala to have a vocalized line that said the name 'Euden' whereas before Dragalia went to hell and back to obscure any mention of his name despite the obvious fact that it is his name. Whether it was with "Your/His Highness" "Prince" "Turkey" or "Brother", they were quite creative in monikers to avoid saying Euden.

They, predictably, changed it incredibly fast to 'my brother', but the original line, was, if I recall, something like "Whatever awaits in North Grastea, I am certain Euden will find his way to the truth of things". They just substituted 'my brother' for Euden and then voila! No more 'Euden' vocalized.

But oh, I remember.

I, however, just happened to notice another stealth edit today, though, that they did similarly quietly.

Where? The Blood that Binds, you know, the story where most the fam teams up to kick the Replica(-aaaaaaaaaa!) Alberius' butt?

It's in the second part of the story, where not!Alberius nearly murders everyone before they're saved by Euden and Zethia finally arriving to provide some much-needed reinforcement as Euden goes toe-to-toe with Alberius as Zethia heals.

When the twins show up, however, Alberius comments this, per the wiki:

Indeed, I found this line captured in several videos of people recording the event as an archive.

However, others (and I do mean plural, this isn't just one person), instead recorded a different line Alberius says at this exact interval!

The line in question?

Now, when I first saw this, I thought maybe that this was the original line and that they changed it just to again keep any mention of the Forbidden out of Dragalia and appease the great Nintendo on high. The former feels a bit more awkward, even if one can still kinda see the air of 'ugh, how many more can there be?' attitude to the sheer number of descendants trying to fight him. To me, I honestly thought it would be the changed, the hurriedly slapped-in edit as ordered to keep Dragalia that much Purer.

But when I looked at the dates of these uploads, I found something curious. Those that had the first line where actually updated earlier than the ones with the later line. Unless several people all got their recordings earlier than the others but then somehow chose to wait a week-month to upload their clips, the second line is the edited version!

Which means that the Dragalia translation team slipped in a comment from Alberius' replica expressing the sentiment of, 'damn that dude had a lot of sex'. Color me surprised!

What's funnier is the implications, because this replica knows Alberius' memories. He's the most capable person 'alive' in any sense to be fully capable of commenting truthfully as to what Alberius got up to, even if it is through his own lens corrupted by the Progenitor.

However, it's also a bit of a logical fail. The replica also knows Alberius lived 300 years ago, and yet seems surprised and annoyed with how many descendants there are. Even if Alberius only had one kid, 300 years is more than enough time for the blood to multiply into the size of the family there is today. Additionally, Alberius himself seems to intend to have multiple children:

...And yet he's personally attributing the fact that there are 7 heirs in front of him to Alberius. Perhaps he thought he woke up to a world as if Alberius were Genghis Khan, bloodline incredibly far-reaching where it seems you can't throw a stick without hitting one of his descendants?

To that, I'd like to just claim the comment's because of the potentially lacking knowledge of this replica. Sure, he may know how to fight, Alberius' life, all that, but that doesn't necessarily mean he has the best grasp on how quickly natural reproduction in humans can boom a single bloodline's number. A silly little goof much as the dragons make goofs regarding human lives and their qualities, like Zodiark failing to realize that humans cannot fit in a chamberpot or that they do not eat raw meat. I still wonder what drove the translators, though, to make that change.

Whatever might have driven that comment, though, that doesn't change the fact that the replica of Alberius flat-out said that his original was, ah, busy, which was not the new lore I had intended being able to be found in Dragalia!

That just leaves the question as to whom, since Dragalia also had a severe allergy from discussing any of the queens in Alberia's history. Myriam, of course, died alone before Alberius ever created a kingdom. The only other character of note in Alberius' vague shipping world is Midgardsormr, as long-joked about in the fandom from both comics and stories, but he doesn't exactly complete the apparently-full love story either, with Alberius having at least one descendant. It's too bad, since the only other note of relevance about the subject at all is Midgardsormr expressing severe doubts of his dating prowess:

...Did Midgardsormr end up being a wingman to Alberius? If so, what did that look like?

"Hey, how are you doing?" (cue massive, revered dragon landing behind him)

"Why are you running, aren't dragons cool???!"

Listen, I've just opened up a whole can of worms unintentionally here, because somehow Dragalia decided to say of all things that Alberius had a storied love life, shall we say.

I wonder how many other little changes the devs might have made over the years, if they're willing to tweak things like this. Does anyone know anything else about little stealth changes the team tried to sneak in without anyone noticing?

[anonymous-dentist]

I am perpetually unable to remember the spelling of vampire au title, but ever since reading the first chapter, I couldn't get it out of my head that the whole Quackity meeting very much gave me ElQuackity and the Eye from Purgatory vibes - and upon reading that Cellbit is doing it so *she* doesn't have to just immediately made me think of that bond he and Baghera have after staying back on the island - I am *so* excited to learn more about what's happening here in the background.

But also, apologies if you mentioned it before, but how did Cellbit end up meeting Richarlyson and becoming his pai with his whole thing going on?

So Cellbit met Richarlyson through Felps, actually

See, Felps is a pretty strange dude. He’s immortal, but nobody knows what the hell he is. So people decided a while ago that he’s a saint, and so there’s usually a pretty big following of people devoted to him

But, really, he’s just a guy. Who is immortal. And who can sometimes do miracles

Cellbit is one of his best friends, so he’s the first person he went to when one of his many many disciples turned out to be a little kid praying to Saint Felps for a roof to sleep under for the night. So Felps took the kid and brought him to Cellbit, who took him in supposedly just for the night, but he immediately got attached, so now he just. Has a son

Pac and Mike are good friends of both Cellbit and Felps, so they decided to chip in and help raise Richas. Felps wishes he could stay with them because he, of course, also adores Richarlyson, but he has to Leave sometimes to go to what he calls “The Square” far off in the mountains to the north

[katyspersonal]

I've made more SOTE progress!!!! And I MEAN progress this time! Damn that was fun but I don't know whether to feel happy or sad because like I said, I really don't want this DLC to end ;-;

1) So, I went in the direction of the ruins place..... and then turned around and decided to get back to whatever dragons business I still had left bfhhhvhg And started with that cave which I recalled had a Wyrm (and also a HUGE bowl of spaghetti sauce gfhyhh)

2) After I killed it, I actually went back to Florissax! Apparently this is the name of Dragon Communion Priestess that is revealed indirectly, much like Boggart's! By that time, @val-of-the-north woke up and I allowed him to take my hand here because he warned me that her quest is terribly broken. And, God... -_- You have no idea how much, but perhaps I am getting ahead of myself....... 🤦‍♂️

3) I heard that I needed to kill two drakes above first, and my reaction was just 💀💀💀💀💀 Because I am AWFUL at fighting them! ......Or I USED to be, but perhaps I am getting ahead of myself hfuhfhybj [2]

4) Found this item in a shack nearby!

5) So, I figured that my usual "strategy" was not going to fly, and finally bothered to upgrade a weapon (big katana) with the built-in anti-dragon effect! You know, a weapon you OBTAIN in this very DLC! HOOOOOO BOY AT LAST!! TWO WEEKS LATER, SHE FINALLY GOT THE BRIGHTEST IDEA TO USE THE TOOLS SHE'S BEEN GIVEN 🙄🤦‍♂️

6) So I proceeded to go above, and met a singular drake, so I decided to actually fight it normally! No pussy long ass distance dumbass Int user combat! Close combat and learning the dodging patterns only!!

And it actually worked. I actually finally adapted to the dragons' moveset and when to roll in and not away, and how to stay around their feet right and how to run from the fire! After two goddamn years of struggling with dragons (excluding SOMEHOW first-trying Borealis, the frozen dragon) I adapted 🙄🙄🙄🤦‍♂️

7) Cool lore:

These grow from the burnt dead bodies across the peak and don't respawn

8) So yeah, in the next place, there were two drakes fighting each other (sure guys whatever), and I figured the boss one can first kill the weaker one so I was just standing and watching them like 🍿 until one left!

9) After defeating THIS one, I felt so much power that I decided to side-track and go back to kill two other dragons (the undead ones in Scadu Altus and Cerulean Coast). I didn't need it, I just felt SUCH a strong urge to do that, you have no idea!!!

9.1) Well, first I actually talked with Igon, because after both of the fighting drakes were killed he laughs and praises us for being a great drake warrior xD He gave me an item (his cut finger) that opens a change to summon him against Bayle, which he really asked to do!

9.2) Okay ANOTHER thing I did was to finally jOiN cOvEnAnT to talk with Florissax that Val asked me to do, because according to him I needed to talk to her at night, which was only possible after defeating the two drakes + I could now ask about Igon

9.3) She also revealed the roots of Dragon fascism; turns out that Ancient Dragons are after Drakes not for some prejudice reason against their species being "diluted", but because Bayle was the one to wound Placidusax and HE is the drake. Argh, can ONE person in this DLC have motivation to be an asshole that is NOT revenge!

10) So I was running around for a bit longer, visited another mine not far away from previous dragon (saw the big rock dude petting the lava slime there), and finally returned to Florissax!

....so, first, she was not appearing during the night. I tried to rest at the grace, still nothing. I tried again, nothing. I asked Val what was going on, and he wasn't sure and went looking on forums, meanwhile I tried to restart from another grace and travel to her location before the night was over! She still did not appear. 🙄

At this rate I started to wonder whether I broke the quest by not talking to her earlier before getting to Igon, but just for the heck of it rested at grace again, but now I skipped time to the night even though it already WAS the night! And then she FINALLY appeared near the Altar at night!! ...only, no new options or dialogue appeared!

According to Val again, I needed to catch her praying to herself so I could give her an item I already had. I reloaded the area, no praying. Reloaded it again, still nothing. Reloaded it again, and she straight up disappeared 🤦‍♂️ I thought that was it, and quest got broken, but just in case I quit the game and started it again.... AND IT WORKED.

....I am WITHOUT WORDS. According to Val, Jarburg quest used to be the same on launch.

11) But yes, she was praying to Placidussax, saying she surrendered her sleep so he could rest, and we got the choice to use Thiollier potion, that did mention it'd merely make dragons sleep for a bit. Damn... to think of it, Elden Ring quests give enough hints.

12) Val reassured me that was it and I just needed to skip a few days in game, so I went to murder remaining drakes! Fast enough, I killed them! Both of them!! However, the one in Scadu Altus was fighting with a lot of Black Knights and it was just entertaining to watch for like 15 minutes until they all finally died 🍿🍿🍿

13) me before: NOOOOO WHY DRAGONS ARE SO HARD, Val I do NOT want to hear your yapping about how they're not """that""" bad, I don't care and I will just run past them ;-;

me now: NOOOOOO WHY ALL DRAGONS IN THE GAME ARE OVER ALREADY, they needed to put more of them in to kill!!!! ;-;

14) I talked to her, where she was very crashed by having fallen asleep:

"I have broken my pledge. I succumbed to the deep slumber... that was meant for my Lord. Twas a craven act! Of a foul and lowly beast! Forgive me, good warrior. My Lord will no longer look upon me. I have fallen from grace. An old dragon no longer. Go on, leave me be."

15) So, I did gfjgffhg And proceeded to go above! Honestly, when I was looking at this area in the world's map, I was SURE it wasn't explorable...

Also, my complaining about no longer having dragons to kill was met!! There was another dragon, an ancient one now! It gave me a bit of a challenge for several times, but I remembered that rocky things are all weak to magic damage so that + defending myself from bolt more helped x)

15.1) This dragon is named Senessax... Sigh... Remember my theory about Placidussax? Zullie (the youtuber) datamined that he had 2 male heads and 3 female heads (1 male and 2 female missing), so I speculated that those heads turned into Granssax, Fortissax and Lanseax? Now that there are more dragons named with -sax, I feel like this theory aged like milk ;-; On the bright note, I recall King's Field (?) had a pair of white and black dragons siblings, so since Fortissax is black and Lanseax is pale and they're siblings, maybe it is return of the trope?

15.2) Fingers in the Ruins are rocky creatures with gold (AKTYALY amber) sewn into them, and ancient dragons are rocky creatures with amber sewn into them... I guess the ancient life is just like this?

16) I finally met Bayle!!!!!! And I actually laughed when Igon INSTANTLY started screaming curses at him upon being summoned XDDD The most character ever! Also cute that he said Bayle was going to face "the true drake warrior and him" gfhhbv He doesn't acknowledge himself as one anymore because of his fear, but acknowledges US!

Took me a few tries, but like I said, I finally adapted! 😎

17) Returned to his corpse:

(He also dropped his bell bearing, need to check the item it gets later just in case)

18) I talked with Florissax about the victory! She gave dialogue: "Ahh, finally, our wish is granted. Our dream, long yearned for, has come to pass. My Lord was blessed with great insight. He saw in the insatiable hunger and fierce spirit of man, the very things that would fell Bayle, our wretched nemesis. Warrior, you soar with the strength of dragons. Whereas I am fallen. Leave me be."

And gave this item! Sooooo that's how her name got revealed!

19) There was an option to tell her that we put her into sleep ;-; I was a bit nervous to pick it but felt like I should jtythhhgb

"Never, in all my years... How could you inflict such cruelty? No, that is not for me to judge. Whatever your hand in it, it was I who succumbed to the sweetness of slumber. The fault lies with me. I may be fallen, but I need not surrender my honour."

Arghhh shut up girl, you talk like an abuse victim :/ Not even a slap in the face?

20) So, she continued:

"On the second thought (? not certain, I forgot to write the starter), I believe you do owe me something for the transgression. On a mere whim, you've stripped me of my one and only Lord. As such, I require another - you. One day, may you become a dragon whole, a Lord of your own making. Lead me, and I will follow. My good Lord."

.....well, "now you have to adopt me" is sure one way to solve the conflict, I guess hfhgfnh

21) This way, I got her spirit ash:

So yeah, I ASSUME that her set is available, and I am not 100% sure whether her head piece is just the mask or simply how her head is supposed to look! She does have a face data, but she would need to since her model uses NPC mechanics, so it could be ignored?

I just haven't seen the description yet, but ER logic does let us adopt to appearances of others (like getting hair of other characters for example), and her body appears to be very black and shriveled, with sharp inhuman features! I sure hope that her look IS how ancient dragons in human form are supposed to look! It would offer an insight on how Lansseax used to look when communicating with the Dragon Cult!

(Besides I am still biased since I wss cursed with boring portrayals of Godwyn x Fortissax where the latter was a basic bitch yaoi bishounen without even the slightest monstrous features 😔 Even horny Lanseax waifu artistd had the basic dignity to at least add some horns and scales hfhyghj Okay that was my monthly voucher of being a petty bitch used, until the next time when my mask of respecting all type of creations cracks hdhhjgfhhnhh)

______________

Conclusion: character development if I've had one lol

[mulders-too-large-shirt]

s2 episode 15 thoughts

i'm back! i was got halfway through the episode yesterday when a storm knocked the power and the internet off so i was sadly unable to finish the ep OR post my thoughts :( but i finished it now!!!

so this episode was about "voodoo" and you have maybe been able to tell from my previous posts, but i love studying religions and belief systems. so honestly i was pretty frightened this episode was going to be all "ahhh look how scary this belief we don't understand is!" and like. haitian vodou has been one of THE biggest victims of this line of thinking. so i was pleased that the real villain of the episode was a white man abusing his power.

and yes, they did make vodou seem ~spooky~ but: i'm pleased the bad guy was a real bad dude and not a caricature of what americans think a scary evil priest would look like.

so let's jump in!

we start the episode with hearing a baby crying. which is never a good way to begin, as far as i am concerned. just not for me.

it's a wife and a husband and this husband seems evil. he snaps at his wife and from his first line i was torn between "this man is genuinely an abusive monster" or "this man is being brainwashed" and thankfully it was the brainwashing route

he screams at his wife and child until the both cry and then he sees his breakfast turn to worms.

worms for breakfast... might sound wild to you, but for a bird, that's just an ordinary day.

he then gets in his car and crashes into a tree and we see some sort of sign on the tree he crashes into....... and this is the SECOND fellow that has died working at this refugee camp....

roadtrip with our agents to north carolina!!!!

(i made a post when i was like halfway through s1 about all the roadtrips these 2 go on and how they allowed them to get to know each other, and a few people were like "um they take planes?", but my POINT ON THE BONDING STANDS and also here is evidence of a REAL road trip)

they step out and both of their trench coats are billowing in the wind. a beautiful sight.

we're learning about what has been going on at this refugee camp they are visiting, where the soldiers have been dropping like flies... they mention that there was a riot recently, and a little boy killed, and i'm thinking, maybe that kind of trauma can lead a person to crash a car or harm themselves? i realize i sound like scully as i type that!!! a real skeptic!!! but it seems plausible.

they visit the home of the new widow and she's like "well that symbol on the tree was ALSO there when the first guy died... and get this... it was on this shell my baby found!" which led to my (joking) theory that it was the baby that was doing the killing... baby witchcraft is likely super effective, compounded by their innocence to create a super critical hit... alas, this theory had no backing

but evil babies aside, she's really freaked out because her late husband's friend grew up in new orleans and says that this is the type of voodoo he saw down there, so... interesting

they go into the refugee camp to ask around, and someone grabs scully, when a boy intervenes and tells the dude who grabbed her to get lost in french and i was SO proud because i knew what he was saying... like yeah i guess my duolingo IS paying off...

(all he said was "vas-tu" but hey! i was still proud)

the child then tries to smooth talk them into buying a good luck charm and mulder buys it which had me LAUGHING... like truly he sees a child and he will support them financially.

(i thought perhaps that the good luck charm would open up and be the symbol we earlier associated with destruction and make them a target but i was wrong!!! it just was a genuine ward against evil. thank u little boy named chester)

one of the military men says that "voodoo caused a riot" and as far as riot causes go i think that is not in the top 10 most common... i'm willing to guess that perhaps it is the awful treatment people in a refugee camp receive... but sure. blame a belief system! (/s)

scully goes to look at the body of the first man that died and JUMPSCARE! his body has been replaced in the morgue with some kind of dog? it looked like a hyena to me, which raised the question: where do you source a hyena in north carolina? no answers were provided

our agents visit the man who is blamed for starting the riot- who is named bauvais, what a wonderful name that is- and he says that the symbol they found was that of the loco-miroir, a crossroads between two worlds that shows the true self. so i'm thinking, perhaps if that is the case, these men that died were being tormented because of the awful things they did to the refugees?

he also describes the dog creature in the morgue as "a warning" which hm. i mean. could be.

scully is doing some driving now, which i noted because it was unusual, and she almost hits someone! (is this why she doesn't normally drive?)

i jest, of course, because who is in the road but... the dude who we earlier saw crash into a tree? the dude whose wife and baby we visited who were mourning his loss? this man? so... he isn't dead?? this part of my notes had many question marks

i guess i assumed that they... you know... had triple checked that he was really dead...

they check his blood and there is some poison in there that scully says is in pufferfish, which are eaten in japan, and i'm like queen i love you so bad, i love that you can look at a chemical and know what fish it comes from, and where in the world they eat that fish....... truly my most beloved

it appears that this man who is newly back from the dead/never dead at all was in a zombie-like state. and mulder is going on about how there are rumors of haitian zombies- which i had heard before, but don't recall anything about- and he is basically being a Nerd

(they're both nerds. i love people who know random Stuff. it's actually a one-way ticket to my heart. no lie!)

((but as for the accuracy of their belief system, i have a feeling it is truly more complex than just the western notion of zombies- i never got to dive into african and diaspora religions in class, so fact-checking this episode is an excellent excuse for me to jump down a rabbit hole))

okay so new proposed theory: take the pufferfish poison... fake a death... but why?

they visit the graveyard to go and find the body of the first man who passed away- but a fellow who watches the graveyard notes that the body snatchers got there first. THE BODY SNATCHERS? did we skip a few centuries back? he says "the voodoo types are buying" which. um. okay.

he ends this by calling the theft of remains "uncool" and for sure. i'd have to agree with that assessment.

but in the distance we see the little boy from earlier- chester- digging about! could HE be the body snatcher? well, mulder is gonna find out!

they chase him down only to find he has a bag of a ton of frogs LMAOOO they had to get those paid frog actors from the last episode in again somehow

so they bring this child- who i think has sadly lost all of his frogs at this point- back to get some food, and this is where i lost all power and was forced to wait a whole day to learned what happened next!

but i picked up here today. this episode was giving me flashbacks to the episode eve from s1. because these two are gonna find a youth and get them a meal. and i appreciate that about them.

anyway, he says he just sneaks out and back into the camp somehow. chester says he sells frogs to bauvais. we love a little guy who is always hustling.

he ate all of his food and mulder gives him more money to go get some more and it is soooo funny to me how mulder interacts with children. it's actually deeply sweet. he is gonna make some random kid on his case smile no matter what.

(oh man. this is the type of guy who is gonna be all "come on, sport, let's go toss the ball around", huh? if he weren't too busy going about chasing aliens and almost dying, i'd say that man would make a decent father)

scully's still in logic mode, saying maybe it was the frogs who made the poison. and yeah, some frogs do in fact make poison, but i'm not sure if north carolina is where you're gonna find em. but i guess there are evil creatures in the south like pythons and black widows so we can't rule it out?

mulder leaves scully in charge of watching chester while he go sees who has been following him. a very perceptive guy. sometimes.

oh!!! it's a fellow we've seen before!! he's a private, and he was friends with the deceased, and he was the one who told the now widow about the voodoo rituals he grew up with. and he refuses to talk with chester around so they have him wait in the car

now, we have dealt with evil children on this show before, but this little dude is not giving evil vibes to me. i find him endearing. which perhaps is what the writers WANT me to think... but no. turns out he was just a nice little dude lmao.

so the private who grew up in louisiana and is now stalking the agents explains that bauvais promised the colonel who is watching over the camp that his men would drop one by one unless they are returned to haiti. he also mentioned that colonel increased "the beatings"

HUH????? he increased them? as in there were some going on before, and now there are more????

scully asks why no one has filed a complaint, and he says "none of us feel good about it, ma'am, but we don't join the marines to feel good" okay but that isn't an answer... like you know that isn't an answer... right??

he's going on about a woman back home dying before her wedding night and the doctors finding snakes in her stomach and scully is like well that sounds fake as hell. and he counters with NUH-UH IT WAS MY FIANCE. ooooh scully was gagged. like what do you even say to that. (zuko voice) "that's rough, buddy"

NOOOO chester broke free from the car.... this is always a risk when leaving children to their own devices. it does make him seem more suspicious, and i was ROOTING for him!!! mulder chases him down because remember, mulder is a track star

and then i think, is this the scene where he sees a cat that has crossed my dash before? yes, it is! a meowing is heard as soon as i wrote those words in my notes. so my hypothesis is that the boy turned into the cat. because he said he gets in and out of the camp as he pleases! and what creature could do that with greater ease than a cat?

(by the end of this episode, my theory is challenged. but it's still nice to imagine)

the colonel is being a man baby... who is shocked? it sure isn't me!!! he's furious to hear about the body being gone, and says "what kind of barbaric religion would desecrate a grave?" to which i gesture vaguely to all cases of a body being moved after being buried, which we usually understand as the work of individuals and not place the blame on entire belief systems... but i got the subtext. he's a bigot.

scully asks him about the beating allegations and he says no way, if anyone is being beaten its actually my men. and then they leave him to eat his breakfast. they clearly do not believe what he had to say

at this point i had flashbacks to the first breakfast scene we saw, and thought that it was going to turn into bugs- but it didn't! instead his food started BLEEDING. gross

so they're going back in the car to go to the motel and scully turns the key and something cuts her hand?!? it looked at first like barbed wire, but then we see it's some kind of thorny branch. conspicuously placed in their vehicle!

"let me see that", says mulder, to whom she replies "oh it's nothing", and he looks visibly annoyed at not being allowed to investigate her little hand cut. let him doctor you sometimes, scully, he needs to feel useful. also you're gonna get blood on the wheel!!!!

at this point i'm freaking out, because what kind of plant was that?! what if it's poison? what if it's the poison that is also in pufferfish and frogs and makes you see stuff?

they speed off and we see... their car had the mark beneath it!!! the mark from earlier which is associated with destruction!!!!!!

cutscene to the colonel beating bauvais. no one is shocked. but it is still a sad sight. he's asking him how he does the magic.

mulder opens the door to his room and a ten of diamonds falls out. he seems to know what this means, even though i do not, and goes to route 10, where he meets...?

DEEP THROAT 2.0?? in north carolina??? mulder says he thought their last meeting would have been their final- remember, when he told mulder to stop chasing down the people involved with scully's kidnapping, and then shot a guy right in front of him, then came back to say the bad guys were gonna search his house- remember that? seemed pretty final to me as well. but clearly not

he says that their search is faltering, and that in 24 hours everyone but the military will be denied access to the camp. mulder is pissed, and is asking why the refugees are being held up, and why are they being beaten, and he says that "those people are innocent civilians, some people in congress might have a problem with that". deep throat 2.0 points out that by the time congress makes an investigation committee, their tracks will be covered, which rings true. but damn, mulder believing- or wanting to believe- that the government will helps people says so much about his character.

so basically deep throat 2.0 shows up to antagonize him for not being on the right track and then leaves. much like deep throat 1.0.

we see scully back at the motel, and her hand is covered in spots and blood, and i wrote a "NOOOOOOO" in my notes because i was distressed!!!!

she knocks on what she thinks is mulder's door- it's door 7, i thought he was in 10?- and the door is unlocked, so she just walks in. but she hears water running, like a shower/bath, so she just talks to mulder through the door LMAOOOO i thought that was so sweet. very married behavior. talking to the husband (platonic or romantic or a secret third thing) while he showers. the private they spoke to went AWOL! isn't that interesting, mulder?

mulder...? there's bloody water pouring in beneath the door?

she busts it open, probably thinking the worst, and it's the louisiana private from before laying dead in the bathtub while water runs. which is definitely not a great thing, but at least it wasn't mulder dying in there. who, conveniently, makes an entrance, holding our first zombie man at gunpoint!!! and zombie man was holding a dagger!!! things are not looking good for him!!!

they take him in for questioning but honestly i was still worried about her hand at this point. like is anyone gonna tend to it.

we learn that... BAUVAIS IS DEAD? allegedly at his own hand. but given that we saw the colonel beating him... let's just say i do not believe it

scully's grasping her forehead, and mulder is asking what's wrong, and she's saying "i'm fine, it's just a headache", and here i made a note to psychoanalyze the fact that the doctor is unwilling to doctor herself. and i WILL have lots to say on that at a later date.

so the newly-dead-in-the-bathtub private gave his friend's wife something to give to the agents if anything happened to him. and they open it up, and it's a photo of the colonel WITH bauvais. so clearly they knew each other. but how? it really isn't answered tbh

they sneak into his office. nice. and they find CHICKEN FEET in his drawers, on top of papers from the dead privates, who had filed complaints against him. so they DID try to make things right and not just blindly follow orders like the one dude implied!

and then mulder opens a chest, and he holds up some dog tags...

but freeze! a soldier tries to stop them. he only gives up when they show that the dog tags belong to the dead privates, and that the BONES of the very first man are sitting in the chest. BONES??? i did not see that one coming. he KEPT THEM??? and he tried to play it off like someone else did it??? oh colonel you are a sick and twisted individual

and now the colonel is back at bauvais' grave, digging it up, chanting haitian creole and holding a knife. um. not great.

the agents roll up to the scene and scully is hiding her face. "what is it, scully?" he asks; she deflects with an "i'm alright". he astutely responds with a "you don't look alright", at which point i am cheering because YEAHHHH WHUMP NATION. HERE WE ARE!!!! MAKE SOME NOISE!!!!

(i mean, it's bad timing, with a wild colonel they need to go catch, but still. when you get a trope you like, you hold it dear. she tells him to go get the colonel and she'll stay in the car)

i thought that perhaps she was hiding her face because she was seeing things, and then she starts... coughing up blood?? and i'm horrified and wondering if this is real or another trick of the poison, and then her hand starts pouring water and a whole dude comes out of it, at which case i realize we are in hallucination town

and back in the graveyard, the colonel is speaking creole in a demon voice, and he moves his hand and mulder is like... stabbed?? or something??? maybe not with a knife but like psychically? he's down for the count

back to scully cam, the man who had emerged from her hand is speaking in a demon creole as well, so she grabs the good luck charm from chester and BAM! everything clears. shoutout to chester for being a real one. i noted that i knew he was a cat, and just as i typed that, a black kitty showed up on top of the car!!!!!!!!

so, now free from the clutches of evil, she runs out to get mulder, who has been lying in the graveyard.

and the FIRST THING this man says is "you're okay?"

AHHHHHH (inconsolable screaming for a really long time)

mulder, who was laying in a graveyard face down with either a real or a psychic stab wound, and after having witnessed some demon fuckery- immediately his mind goes to making sure that she was okay. oh that terrible, terrible need to protect kicking in, as natural and as undeniable to him as breathing. these two are so intertwined it's sickening. aughhhh i am tearing up typing this. what have they turned me into....

so it appears colonel wharton has been killed by the spirit of bauvais, at least according to what the viewer sees and also mulder's report, so cosmic revenge has been served. scully didn't see all this go down, however, so she just sees him in his coffin and is like ???? but again mulder was face down in the dirt so. she's probably thinking, well, who knows what actually happened

but, direct action worked: the refugees are now being repatriated! the agents ask to see the list of people who are returning and are confused because chester isn't on there. and the soldier says, oh right, that poor boy, he died in the riot a while back

HUH??????? he wasn't really there the whole time? he was a benevolent spirit who ate the french fries they bought him and maybe appeared as a cat???

i love that for him. and i'm also deeply sad to learn that he was dead the whole time. but i'm happy that he is getting to spend the afterlife hustling people and digging for frogs.

(of course, that is, if you believe the mulder sort of theory..... now, if you're scully, you're probably thinking, huh, weird that little boy lied about his name... but then again, after her paranormal nurse experience, i'm not sure she's entirely convinced that positive spirits aren't out and about. there has to be a tiiiiny part of her that holds out hope, even if it's scary)

so, the episode ends with the guy who earlier proclaimed body snatching uncool burying the colonel. and we see that- surprise- he wasn't actually dead! he was somehow also put into a zombie-like state, and is screaming as he is buried alive. ah, justice has been delivered.

overall, i liked this episode! the approach towards handling haitian vodou could definitely have been better and less exoticised, but frankly i was expecting a lot worse. i thought it was an interesting premise, i liked little chester, and there are some ambiguities- like, how did the colonel know bauvais? what put them in the zombie state? was it poison from the thorns that caused the hallucinations? if so, why would the good luck charm clear it? but they were ambiguous enough to just leave me feeling curious, rather than entirely stumped like the last episode did. because i'm still trying to put the pieces in place with that one. i was really thinking it over in the shower today.

anyway, loved their interactions this episode- loved worried mulder, loved trying to play it cool and strong scully, loved her thinking it was his room and waltzing in and reporting while he showered, loved freshly stabbed man asking if she was okay, loved mulder meeting another child and saying i'm gonna make this kid smile, loved him looking pissed when she wouldn't show him the cut on her hand, loved a corrupt military official being buried alive. a lot to enjoy here.

[troutfur]

Where am I from anyway?

Let's go! Response roundout! I got a couple people who got it correct but let's first review all the wrong answers.

@somebirdiedude

I wanna say Australia or Oceania as a whole? Just vibes + pseudo-memory of u saying that to base it off of tbh

I used to date an Australian genderfluid guy and we were very good friends for years. I don't know if any of my speech habits in English were derived from that but I don't think so? He didn't have a super pronounced aussie accent to my ear at least. Is it that perhaps? But anyway. No. Wrong hemisphere entirely, or hemispheres rather. Next!

@gophergal

Well, your first language is Spanish (iirc) and I'm pretty sure you aren't from North America or Europe, which doesn't narrow it down much. I'm just gonna guess El Salvador

My beloved mutual. With so little information you actually came so close, but you missed the mark. Props for guessing Central America though. We're so ignored in the world stage unless it's to complain about how many of us are desperate enough to try our luck being smuggled up north.

@jainkens

Brazil? The name makes me think it's from some Latin American country, I vaguely remember something about a parrot as a reference or something, and the color scheme of it is green which subconsciously made me think of Brazil. But broadly somewhere in Latin America (I am pretty sure that includes Brazil

I... I can't believe I'm only now noticing my Yellow-Naped Amazon Parrot fursona combined with my name being José makes it seem like I was deliberately referencing José Carioca from classic Disney propaganda pieces films Saludos Amigos and The Three Caballeros. Just look at them!

But anyway, no. I am from Latin America but not Brazil. Spanish speaking Latin America.

@jayinserenity

I can't remember for sure, but for some reason when we first started interacting I think I was convinced you were some brand of non-UK European. I could not begin to tell you Why that was what my brain insisted upon, but it was swiftly corrected lmao.

This reminds me of this one time I was playing DnD with an international online friend group. As we were coordinating our timezones, our DM, who was Scottish was reviewing all our locations. He listed me as part of the Europe timezone and when I said I wasn't European he was all like "Oh it doesn't matter that you weren't born here, you're still as much a European as the rest of us" and so on and so on. And I was so confused. Turns out one of my other friends in the group just straight up forgot I told them where I'm from and assumed Spain based on Spanish being my first language. So they told our DM and our DM in turn assumed me saying I'm not European meant I was an immigrant.

@heathfall

I know the answer so I'm going to give a blatant lie. Nevada, USA

SO GLAD THIS WAS THE ONE GUESS THAT HAD ME BE USAMERICAN. Legitimately, I really hope I don't come across as a gringo online. I was dreading this was gonna be a majority answer since it's just standard the internet is American. But I'm pleased how it seems the Latin American vibe shines through even with people who don't know the answer outright.

@tigerclawstar-shaped-cookie

peru i think. i cant. remember. something like that. evaporates

Too far south dude. But props for guessing Spanish-speaking Latin America.

And now for the correct answer!

@kingmystrie

i know you're in south america but idr if you're from argentina or guatemala it hink it was guatemala

@offkeyed-reason

idr if you mentioned it on the server but im pretty sure there was this name generator set that you asked for a specific region for/clarification bc Guatemala is different from other places. idr whose generators they are but yeah. Guatemala's my final answer

🎊🎊🎊

Yup! Guatemala, Central America. Although I like the note that you thought I could be from Argentina. It is indeed true I do reblog a surprising amount about Argentina. Blame it on their current president. Javier Milei is such a fascinating trainwreck of a man personally. It'd be funny if he wasn't running his country into the ground.

[brittababbles]

House of the Dragon S2e1: blow by blow reaction on second watch

Spoilers beyond this point

1. I love the tapestry opening. Very reminiscent of GoT’s maps.

1a. Matt Smith gets top billing, huh? Interesting choice.

2. Ah Winterfell, and the Wall. And a nice thick northern accent doing voiceover. Is it weird that I can smell Winterfell? I’ve missed this place.

3. :( sweet Jace seems to be having a nice time in the North. Enjoy while you can, sweet boy. Though he’s got to be freezing at the Wall.

4. What does it keep out? Don’t worry about it, Jace. It doesn’t matter right now. That’s a different series entirely.

5. Jace looks hauntingly like Jon Snow when he’s standing on the wall and I Don’t Like It

6. Rhaenys not taking Daemon’s shit makes my soul less unhappy. She’s all “hey daemon remember how you let my daughter die? This is like that.”

7. In fairness, Daemon isn’t wrong.

8. “Would that you were the king” gods be good, Rhaenys. We’d all be dead

9. I have nothing to add about Rhaenyra in the Stormlands. The entirety of it is just beautiful and sorrowful.

9. Why are we still talking about the Stepstones? That was soooo last season, Corlys.

10. Who is this burly handsome fellow chatting with Corlys? He’s delightful. Dragging bodies out of the sea! Wowweee 😍

11. Dude if you can see her from that far out, that dragon is Vhagar. Chill.

12. Aegon seems to at least like his children. And Helaena, at least on some level.

13. “The rats” oh my sweet girl.

14. So. How long have you and Cole been doing this, Alicient? More than once? Is he your whore, perhaps?

15. But also why do you have to stop? You’re a widow. You can do what you want.

16. CHEESE?!

16a. And Cheese’s dog, whom I adore.

17. Aegon is… so bad at this being king thing. Just so bad at it and it’s weirdly endearing. Also little Jaehaerys? So sweet. Poor thing.

18. I love how nobody likes Tyland Lannister. I don’t like Tyland Lannister.

19. Aemond!

19a. Does Aemond straighten his hair or is it just like that?

20. I forgot about Otto Hightower. And Larys Strong. I am happier having forgotten them and shall continue to do so.

21. Larys knows you been fucking the lord commander, Alicent. And he’s spying on you. And he’s still the creepiest guy in a series that casually accepts incest as the norm.

22. Syrax is my second, maybe third favorite of the dragons and I have missed her.

23. Rhaenyra my Queen. My gods this was tragic. Daemon is right: she shouldn’t have done this alone. I’m glad at least Syrax is with her

24. “Aegon the Magnanimous” wh wh what 😂

25. You’re so bad at this Aegon. But I guess at least you’re earnest about it. Aegon the Frat Boy is too on point, I suppose.

26. You know, I don’t like Otto, but honestly. Bless his heart for herding his grandson through King-hood is painful to watch.

27. In retrospect, the odd shots of the castle make sense. This whole episode foreshadows the end of it with these weird, creeping shots of the Red Keep, particularly in the halls and through the railways.

28. I see that nobody in Aemond’s family understands him at all. Except maybe Daemon.

29. Oh that’s not someone knocking on the door. That’s the drums of the soundtrack. Heh.

30. Baby goats!

31. Mysyria is… not my favorite. But she does have a thorough understanding of Daemon that Rhaenyra seems to sometimes lack.

32. Whoa. Damn, Daemon. Easy now. Don’t break the table.

33. Syrax is back! Hi Syrax!

34. Aw, that Targaryen forehead touch.

35. “I want Aemond Targaryen” I feel like that’s a common feeling toward him, for better or worse, Rhaenyra. Just based on fanfic results alone.

36. Daemon I know where this plan ends and I don’t like it.

37. Jace! Mama Rhaenyra! Oh Jace is trying so hard to be brave for his Queen.

38. I’ve seen a lot of people raving against this sequence in the Sept but I really liked it. Alicent did not mean for Luke to die and I do think she still cares for Rhaenyra. Her childhood friend lost a son, and to pray for peace for a dead child is not something that should be shamed. Also on a cinematography level, the candlelight vs the pyre flames was gorgeous.

39. Little Joffrey is breaking my heart.

40. I spent a solid ten seconds trying to work out why Aemond was screwing around in Blackwater Bay because I assumed he had taken over the Cloak of Crime. But no! It’s Daemon! Again!

41. Ehhhh Blood and Cheese and I just don’t like it. Cheese is just gross.

42. Interesting departure. Daemon orders Aemond’s death.

43. Speaking of whom. Aemond is… odd. He isn’t wrong, but he overestimates himself. But then he’s not entirely wrong. His mother’s fondness for Rhaenyra could be seen as a weakness. Though he certainly is playing his own hand here.

44. Ah the “cunning spider” line from Cole that is just a hilarious projection.

45. Does Aemond not have to get up when Otto walks in the room?

46. No Otto. Vhagar is the greatest single power in the realm. Aemond is but a fly on her back.

47. Cheese’s dog looks so much like my dog and I am so upset about it.

48. So… y’all are just going to waltz across the throne room and nobody will notice? That’s… fine?

49. Loyal as a hound, eh?

50. I hold with Aegon the Frat Boy as his title.

51 Uh, you go up the stairs to get upstairs, Blood. That’s how upstairs usually works.

52. DON’T KICK THE DOG!!! 😫😫😫

53. So… Daemon told them that if they can’t find Aemond they should just… improvise? Any male’s head will do? That’s not what Rhaenyra said at all.

54. Why are they just wandering around the castle unchecked? This just doesn’t make sense

55. I really wanted to see a bit more from Helaena here. Some pleading, some begging, some bargaining, maybe. I know she’s probably shutting down emotionally, and Phia’s face shows terror - and guilt - very well. But this whole scene is just so odd. But, I do think there is something genuine about this performance

56. “They killed the boy” she’s in shock. This part didn’t feel at all out of place for the Helaena we’ve seen on screen.

57. And that’s it. What a strange episode.

[badstepsmoving]

Hey!! Kinda random, but I have a few cheese questions for youu. Answer if you want! no pressure, friend :) 🧀<3

What is the most unique cheese you have ever tried?

Favorite cheese for a sandwich?

What is your favorite and least favorite type of cheese?

Your favorite fact about cheese? (Any cheese you want)

What is your favorite cheese-based dish to cook at home?

oh maddie my wonderful friend i would absolutely love to answer these cheese questions! listen. i will ramble about cheese anytime any place.

what is the most unique cheese you have ever tried?

the most unique cheese i've ever tried has to be the 20 year cheddar from hooks. yup, 20 year cheddar! that's a cows milk cheddar that has been aged for 20 whole years. it's made by hooks cheese company out of mineral point wisconsin and is only released every few years. it's by far the oldest cheese i've ever tried and i was pleasantly surprised with how it tasted. i'm not a big fan of hooks cheddars. they taste a little too sharp for me, almost astringenty. but the twenty year was more like ... well balanced. it was a little more sweet, toasty, and nutty. i was a huge fan but i didn't buy any. it was like $150 a pound it was bonkers.

favorite cheese for a sandwich?

my favorite cheese for a sandwich is either cheddar or munster tbh. munster can be a bit funky, so i prefer using store bought pre sliced munster than like ... a munster you buy at a cheese shop. for a while the cheese hut had this amazing munster called north fork that was actually a soft cheese instead of that more firm sliceable texture. it was cloth bound and whiskey washed. deceptively stinky. like you think it'll be funkier than it is. but anyway, yeah, a firm munster is fucking amazing on a sammie.

what is your favorite and least favorite type of cheese?

i'm not sure if i have a specific type of cheese that is my least favorite honestly. usually with any cheese type i am able to find some cheese in that category that i enjoy. i think i'm gonna pick a specific one that i dislike. that cheese is gonna be roquefort. i love blue cheese okay. i am a blue cheese enjoyer. the flavor of roquefort is amazing but the texture? fucking terrible for me. it's a sheeps milk blue which means it's super fatty and creamy which are all amazing things, but the texture of the blue. awful. it's so gritty and grainy. it feels like i'm eating like ... a beautiful soft cheese with sand mixed in. big no from me! i think my favorite type of cheese at the moment is gouda. we have so many amazing goudas at the cheese hut right now dude i ate literally so many little pieces today while i was mongering. there's a ton that you can do with goudas but honestly an aged gouda is top tier. the flavors really round out and turn almost caramely and toasted. some of my fave goudas of the moment are luna from hill valley dairy, cupola from read barn creamery, sweet annie from landmark creamery, and overjarige from marieke penterman.

your favorite fact about cheese? (any cheese you want)

ash is often used in cheese making! currently cheese makers really only add ash (usually derived from vegetables) for aesthetic purposes. back in the day ash was used to help preserve cheese. it also helps neutralize the ph in different cheeses. it barely has any flavor and can be a bit off putting in color. my favorite cheese that uses vegetable ash is linedeline from blakesville creamery out of port washington wisconsin.

what is your favorite cheese-based dish to cook at home?

this for sure has to be baked mac and cheese. i love it so much. because honestly, you can use "fancy" cheese or you can use just store bought whatever you have on hand cheese. also there's something about loads of cheese and noodles that never ever gets old.

unprompted cheese question, @foundinthevoid, always always accepting!

[alpaca-clouds]

"But it was Normal Back Then!" Or: The wrong ideas people have about history

Another history rant for today, because I just cannot help myself. But this is another topic that is kinda an evergreen. Especially when it comes to any sort of diversity, representation, and white, cishet dudes writing about historical settings. They usually do one or both of those things:

Write a story fully and entirely focused on white, cishet, abled dudes in the historical setting

Submit any marginalized character they might have to misogyny, queerphobia, racism and the like.

This will always be hidden behind the idea of "historical accuracy". The lack of characters who are not white, cishet, abled and male is sold as "historically accurate". And... I don't know, what to tell you, but... There is a good thing that it isn't. Especially not when it comes to medieval settings.

Medieval Europe was far more diverse than a lot of people imagine.

Mind you, yes, there were less people, that today we would describe as non-white, living in Europe. But there were people. Because, as I say so often: The real world is not a videogame in which there were additional walls. There were Roman folks from 300 AD going to fucking Japan.

Throughout most of European history there was trade with Asia and North Africa. Of course beginning with the crusades (so at the end of the 11th century) there was the beginning of anti-islamic and some racist sentiment starting in Western Europe. But, here is the thing: This was not at all comparative to the kinda racism that would develop at the beginning of the colonial period (so 1492).

(Antisemitism is an entirely different topic, though.)

And when it comes to queerphobia and misogyny... I honestly do not know how to tell you this. But... You know, that a lot of our ideas of these things in the middle ages are actually connected to the Rennaissance and also especially the Victorian period, which strongly went in for both things. And who then ended up projecting their ideas on sex and gender into the past.

See, when it comes to the middle ages in particular we do have the issue that there is a lot of primary sources missing - and a good chunk of sources we have being connected to the Catholic Church, which obviously was misogynic. BUT... From the other sources that we have, it seems fairly clear that this was in fact not true for most of the European medieval culture.

There is the issue in history (which I will probably blog about in a future blog) that often when we will usually have a bias towards giving more credit to the "official" stuff from the time. Court documents and church documents. But... While fewer people at the time were literate, it was actually more people than we imagine. And those other literate people wrote diaries and letters.

And from those other sources we can gleam that misogyny and queerphobia where by far not as severe as in later times. They existed, yes, but by far not as severely as we would see - for example - in the Victorian period.

Now, there is a plethora of reasons why this was the case. Something I can talk about a bit, if there is interest. But yeah...

Like, I am sorry. But the entire "that's historically accurate" thing most often comes from people, who have - in fact - not studied history at all. *coughs*Shadiversity*coughs*

[blindrapture]

TUESDAY JULY 5TH, 2011 (Duck and Cover)

9:39 AM Yearning to begin anew Spinning the labyrinth blue The landscape opens To a refreshing twist Of passion, music, Society sun-kissed! Follow me into civilization Close the door behind You fall deeper, you star sweeper Into the story of mankind There’s nothing like a little bit of Sunsetters to wake you up in the morning, huh, journal? :D

9:53 AM Donnie's found a road map in the lobby. Gotta discuss where we're going next.

9:55 AM "Do you think we'll go through Nebraska?" I mean, we can go anywhere we want. I was actually thinking of checking out New York. It's not too far from here, relatively. "Oh. What's in New York?" Could be many things. Big important city. I'd expect some people, like good guys, still hanging out. "But what's there for you?" Well. There was that book. In that library. It told me I have a friend there. I showed you that log, right? "Yeah! You did. That's as good a reason as any I can think of. I can wait for Nebraska, I'm sure we'll be on the road again before long." Probably! What's in Nebraska? "Nothing, it's fine." You sure? "I'm sure. Let's get moving!"

9:59 AM And off we go, down side roads! Hopefully we can find the motorhighway.

10:10 AM It feels good to be in America again at last. I've missed this, like, general style of road. Trees. Road sign. And with Donnie by my side, I feel like I can take on the world. :D ...she kissed my cheek. we're gonna hold haaaands

10:32 AM I almost miss being on the Exodus. At least it meant we didn’t have to walk to each place. >_>

10:42 AM ..oh my god no way It's a goddamn Rapture Duck! Jesus, look at the size of that thing! quack "They're really cute…" They're monsters. "How can you say that? Look at it, it's a duck!" Just keep it away from my journal. o_o;;

10:53 AM I hear a car in the distance! People! O: "Americans!"

10:54 AM Look, it's a little gray volvo! It's.. it's coming onto the sidewalk. Oh god, LOOK OUT

10:55 AM man, fuck you, and your volvo… what are you doing, don't turn around, just keep driving! for fuck's sake here it comes again dive! run! dive! duck! DUCK! DUCK! RAPTURE DUCK! OH MY GOD FUCK FUCK JUST FUCK OFF

10:56 AM The car's rolling down its window GUN pointing at us "Give us the girl." WHAT donnie "Are you serious?" "Do we look like we're joking?" Well. Hang on, let me take a closer look at you.

11:00 AM So, uh. Donnie was kidnapped by plants. Yeah, literally just. Plant men. Vines and twigs. Driver was just a fucking bush. Gunman had arms of bark. I'm not saying I capitulated at the mere sight of them, I mean they got out of the car and really put up a fight! They.. drove off to the north. Pretty sure that's north. It's the direction we were going anyway. I've gotta... I've gotta go after them.

11:11 AM I wish!!! I wish for Donnie!!!

11:20 AM Walking down quiet highway roads, trying to ignore that ever-prevalent cawing I’ve gotten so used to. quack And that goddamn quacking. Leave me alone! Where were you in all this, huh??? With your fierce beak, you could have eaten those plant dudes! Right? What do ducks eat? Well?? Tell me!!! Why are you just standing there, looking at me like that? ...

11:21 AM RIDING THE RAPTURE DUCK

11:43 AM There! The volvo! It's parked in front of that shack! Thank you, duck! You're alright. Do you want to.. come with me? Can you fit through that door? Have you killed before? quack

11:45 AM Dark hallway. Long hallway. Either that, or we're walking in circles because we can't see anything. The air turned very stale as soon as we came in. I think it's a rabbit hole. It's gotta be.

11:48 AM I hear a faint roar. Gripping Tiger Stripes. There's faint music above the roar... Two big double doors.

11:50 AM “No fireworks, no cameras, no merch, in fact I’d go as far as to say there’s no real quality of service but that still doesn’t change the fact that WE’RE PLAYING TONIGHT– HELLO, CAMPER FESTIVAL!”

12:03 PM Out in the lobby now. I’m sure the Camper Festival means something, something big, but I don’t have time to look around. ..Ms. Desmond? She’s just sitting there, watching the performance. Ooh, over there! Is that Bonnjo Vjonsped?! OwO rightsorrylet’sgo ..they’re missing their guitarist. o__o SORRY OKAY GOING this duck does NOT like loud music

12:08 PM The door opened to a florist, and then past that, a forest. I made sure to ask for some weed-killers on my way out. I mean, she didn't give me any, because I have no money. But I made sure to ask! Man, this shrubbery! Real thick! Why am I still talking

12:11 PM I hear things nearby. Hey duck, can I ride you again? Where are you going?

12:12 PM I swear I just saw something running through the canopy. Duck, where'd you go? :(

12:19 PM I swear a bug's crawled up my trouser leg I hate this so much

12:20 PM I hear voices. And honks! Friend, you're close! :D Just gotta keep.. whacking shrubs out of the way…

12:25 PM hnnnng

12:28 PM Three th a voice speaks to me...

Night I don’t know what time it is. It’s dark, though. Very. I can’t see much, but I can make out vague shapes of the trees around me.

Night (2) Listening for the duck. Listening for the voices. Listening for anything, but there's just, there's nothing. Gonna walk a bit.

Night (3) I can hear faint birds singing. They sound nothing like birds are supposed to. May not even be birds; I’m just guessing at this point. ..the ground here’s suddenly wet. o_o

Night (4) Dry ground again. I hear footsteps nearby.

Night (5) There’s definitely someone there. I can see the vague shape of their body. I’m finding out who it is.

Night (6) I bumped into a tree. I heard the person run off. I don’t know where to go.

Night (7) I’ve been wandering for a really long time; I’m sure it’s been half an hour, at least. My eyes don’t adjust to the darkness, no moon rises to shine light, nothing. The forest remains in its perpetual darkness.

Night (8) I found a piece of paper. I can't read it, but I'll keep it with me. Can read it later.

(Attached: "In the woods there is peace. And the birds, And the woodland animals! On the trail, On my way out from you. And the wind, And the rustling trees hear me.")

Night (9) All the trees look the same. I think. I can barely see any of them anyway.

Night (10) How long have I been out here? Too long.

Night (11) Person again. I think. I see a vague white shape.

Night (12) The person is wearing a theatrical sadface mask and standing there, staring at me. They won’t answer to my shouts.

Night (13) Tree.

Night (14) Walking.

Night (15) I blink and some trees disappear.

Night (16) I blink and some trees appear.

Night (17) The sadface man is in front of me. Under his mask, I am watched. “How will you handle the world crumbling around you?“ do you want to see? ings just ran into a nearby cave. The duck's here and quacking at me.

12:30 PM The cave is filled with plant-men. Flowers and leaves and vines, and. Wait. These things. They’re Treefingers. You're Treefingers! And they’re staring at us welcomingly. Me and the duck. Guess they're not threatened.

12:31 PM I asked one of them where they took Donnie. They’re looking at each other oddly. Do you guys not talk? Do you know any Treefingers who do? I'm being led somewhere now.

12:33 PM This is an arena. You guys do, like, cagefighting here?

12:34 PM One of the Treefingers told me, if I want to see Donnie again, I must challenge “the beast,” for it is the beast that Donnie is being sacrificed to. ..okay I hate these guys again. I’m doing it. For Donnie.

12:36 PM The air’s getting a little thick. I’m coughing a bit. Where are you, beast? Tiger Stripes, give me… ..Treefingers are approaching. They said the beast has been called off. Donnie is being released. o_o Okay. Works for me, I suppose. Do I look that intimidating? ...was it the duck?!

12:39 PM Being taken to Donnie, down into some rooms caked in mud.

12:41 PM DONNIE OH GOD I MISSED THAT HUG. She looks pretty shaken. They didn't hurt her, though. Let's get the hell out of here. Take the duck.

12:45 PM “Someone would like to speak with you before you go.” In a big mud hut, outside. Their leader or something? o_o

12:46 PM Oh dear god. How'd you get the wooden suit back? YES, Mistress! Hello! Oh, how I have completely missed you! "I've come back from my exquisite tour of the Bahamas, and I am so pleased to see you again. I know, I know, you had places to go, and you did a fine job of role-playing with me last time we saw each other, so I forgive you for just ducking and running. But I heard you were in the area, so I thought I'd have you come by and say 'Hello.'" ...hello. "You've managed to hold onto your girl all this time. Haven't broken her heart yet. ..hoho, just a joke!" …what do you want, Harlequin? "Ouch. I did get the message, you know. You.. shut the door on me quite clearly. Both of you!" donnie's not saying a word "These plant guys, they're so much nicer. They give me what I want. They seem to think I have connections? Whatever might have given them that idea?" … "God, look at you. You're so scared of me. Like, actually scared. Listen. I'm not gonna make this any more awkward than this has to be. I saw you were in the area, and I just wanted to give you a word of warning." ... What is it? "I'm not the only bad guy in the world, y'know? And as far as the totem pole of power goes, I'm hardly even on the radar. You made it to America? Took the long way. Put so much work into it. To what, to escape? Sky's still red here. And me, I'm still here. Maybe you did escape something, but you're just so... clueless about it! "So that's my warning: You don't know what you're running from, and that means you don't know what you're running into either. You just don't know." Yeah… "Yeah? So, you'd better find someone who does." giggle donnie "Thanks for the advice. Can we go now?" waves her hand "You have cities to see, drugs to take, a job to do, worlds to save, whatever." Well. Uh. she's looking right at me now. with that unmoving mask of a face. ...bye? o_o; silence ...

2:39 PM We.. got moving after that. That was.. weird. I even kinda forgot it happened and wasn't a fever dream until I picked up my journal to update it and saw it really written there. Donnie definitely didn't want to talk about it. I don't know what we'd even say about it. And now we’re getting close to New York. Duck travel is good travel.

3:21 PM Most of the creatures around here are zombies. It’s getting pretty dull.

4:04 PM …wow, a spidercat!!! VARIETY!

4:27 PM We’ve come across a large body of water. God, we're gonna need a boat. Wait no. Boating’s for squares. Get with the circles. Better yet, get with the rhombi. "Jordan, what the fuck are you talking about?" We need a rabbit hole! "Jordan, we're on a giant duck."

4:28 PM went right into the water, no problem. quack Well. Okay, I feel silly.

5:25 PM yeah yeah we made it across no problem, but guess where we found our way to now? Broadway Street! We’re in New York City! Skyscrapers piercing the red sky with their manmade majesty, streets as empty as London’s were. Okay okay okay, where to now? Shit, that’s a really good question. I know I (should) have a very good friend here, but this is a fucking huge city. who knows if she’s still here.

5:28 PM ..graffiti on the side of a clothes shop! “embracethearchangel“ I’ve seen this message before. Still no spacebar, but it’s significant. “RAPTURE IS COMING, CAN’T YOU FEEL IT, IT’S COMING AND IT’S COMING SOON” “A voice speaks to me: Would you like to see?” “NORTH OF TOWN IS PLAGUE TERRITORY, STAY OUT” “What did Doctor Cloud discover in the Genera?” “But it’s all in a mouse’s night to take on all those who fight” ..someone’s coming.

5:31 PM It’s an older man, long black hair going grey, a mustache, trenchcoat. He’s wearing one red glove. o_o

5:32 PM “Welcome to America, White Jester. You’ve got a lot of work to do.” Um. Alright. And who are you? “Oh, you’ll get to know. All in good time. But you're gonna want to know, you're expected at the Soho Grand Hotel." Expected? How do you know me? "Pfft. White Jester? Arsonist of Paris? You're known." Wait, that wasn't me! "And furthermore, do you not know you're being followed?" I'm what? We're what? "I did my job. You know where to go. Watch your back." walks away Well. Okay. o_o Guess we'll go look for a building by DAMN NAME and NO ADDRESS!!!

5:50 PM Soho Grand Hotel. Parked our duck outside. The lobby’s huge. Broken glass everywhere, chairs overturned, doors closing DOOR AFTER THAT DOOR

5:51 PM The world has too many hallways. I see a mirror at the end of the hall. Damn, my suit is nice. :3 Staircase up here.

5:52 PM ‘Nother mirror down there. Seriously, I love that suit. .w. Have I gotten taller? We’re calling out for my friend. If she hears us, she’ll come out.

5:53 PM Up these stairs! I take it all these halls have mirrors. Beautiful suit, Jordan. Fits you much too well. >w> .why am I the only one up h oh, I’m not. Donnie's right there. ..then where’s her OH THAT'S NOT A MIRROR THAT'S THE FUCKING SLENDER MAN WHAT DO WE DO IN THIS SITUATION, DO WE MAKE A LOT OF NOISE? WAVE OUR ARMS? that's bears, DO WE HIDE IN A ROOM? DO WE RUN DOWN THE STAIRS? "GET DOWN!" FUCK budda budda budda

5:57 PM We're in a hotel room now. A dude in big fuck-off military gear escorted us to safety. Donnie's asking the man if he really just shot at the slender man with a high-powered rifle. "Yes, ma'am. That's policy." Hey, it worked! donnie "It scared it off, sure! But that thing didn't bleed. You can't kill it! What if you just pissed it off?" "Then I pissed it off. You two didn't." "Okay, your funeral." You say this is 'policy?' The government's? "That's right." Huh. Are we, like. Okay? Did we walk into a top-secret base or anything? "You're fine. This is civilian property. We do a routine sweep every day, as the Soho's one of the places we've designated a safe zone." 'We,' like, the military? "Yep." donnie "We were told we were expected here? Were you expecting us?" "It's a routine sweep of a hotel. I expect civilians, but I do not know who you specifically are." "..huh." "Dinner's in the restaurant below around 8. Scream if you see any more monsters; someone will hear you. Goodnight."

6:00 PM What just happened? Did we just, like, get lucky? "Maybe we're still expected. He said this was a safe zone, and this room looks pretty clean. There may be lots of people staying here." Yeah... probably!

6:22 PM Nothing. No one's at reception. There were some cooks in the restaurant getting set up, so people are definitely here, but the cooks hadn't heard anything. They pointed us to a small office on the ground floor that was being used as reception, and.. no one's there! Are we supposed to go knocking on every door in this hotel?

6:57 PM this is stupid "look, we'll just try a few more, and then take a break." I would much rather be chilling in our hotel room "we can do that later! after dinner!" but that's an hour away! :C "do it for me? ;)" …

8:10 PM Fuck yeah, dinner! I'm having pizza! :D

8:50 PM GOODNIGHT, JOURNAL!

(Attached: “Jordan's arrival in America is hard to make sense of, about to get harder. There are two different angles to consider: the American gods curious about the boy who stood up to a Fear; and Jordan's own background, which he tries to avoid focusing on. We have a lot to get through, so I'll clarify what I can when I can. Watch for song lyrics.”)

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