#i am self sufficient

[ceratedfish24]

If you think Snowbugs (Scott/Tango) is a strange thing to ship because they’ve hardly interacted, I’ll have you know that I think Scott/Doc would be incredible. Stay in your lane mainstream shippers. I am crazy and delusional.

[1-800-luvmail]

[ read part two w/ könig here ! ]

reader who would rather eat cardboard than have their self sufficiency questioned vs cod men [ 1 / ? ]

price— who is fighting the urge to just take the jar and help you the minute he sees you struggle with the tight lid— tries to reason with you as you insist you've almost got it.

"sweetheart," he sighs, watching with his arms crossed as you continue your stubborn attempt, "why don't you let me have a go, hm?"

"it's basically open— this stupid lid just won't—" you grumble, more to yourself than to him. he's unsure which is more stubborn: the lid of the jar or you.

eventually, you do get it open.

"see! hah! i told you—" you grin, triumphantly holding the jar up for him to see.

"that you did," price can't help but be slightly amused, "many times."

"and i was right."

strangely, you never struggle with a jar like that again. not like you think much about it, just happy about your little victories. and now, you offer to open everything for him. price lets you.

he's never telling you that he's made a habit of loosening the lids before you can get to them, because, god that smile of yours as you succeed in "helping" him is just too adorable.

[aroaceleovaldez]

i think the thing i'm most disappointed about with riordanverse fandom now versus like 2014 is not only has the fandom not gotten any less racist or queerphobic or ableist (in fact in some regards its gotten worse!) but now it's just boring too. like there's no fandom infrastructure anymore - the community these days is almost entirely source material-driven - and you deviate from canon even slightly people get weird about it. whatever happened to the post-HoO fanon boom. the fandom needs to get weirder again. and self-sufficient. and less offensive.

[tekkenenjoyerblue]

Living off the land

[scattered-winter]

everyone pray for me. I'm quitting my job

[syn0vial]

touch-averse or touch-starved? an analysis of boba fett's attitudes towards physical touch in legacy of the force

a sufficient number of people expressed interest in this topic that i'm finally making this post! i find this facet of fett's characterization quite fascinating and naturally wanted to share, especially bc it's so unexpectedly nuanced in a lot of ways. so here it is, for the consideration and enjoyment of fic writers, expanded universe enjoyers, and general fett fans alike!

touch is (ostensibly) unbearable because it's a form of compassion. throughout the series, if there's one thing we learn can put fett into the fight-or-flight reflex, it's compassion. at multiple points, his gut reaction to someone showing him compassion is to either lash out at them to get them to stop (as he does with jaina), or if he's not willing to do that, get away from them as fast as he can (as he does with sintas and occasionally beviin early into their friendship). fett explicitly equates more intimate forms of touch (such as hugging, or taking his hand) with compassion and states outright that he has no idea how to respond to such gestures. yet, fett's attitude towards touch cannot be boiled down to simple aversion, because

fett's reactions to physical touch read more like someone who is touch-starved, not touch-averse. despite the attitude towards compassion explored above, when fett is actually faced with compassionate touch, his reaction is not what one would expect. in contrast to when people try to verbally show him compassion, which will get the aforementioned fight-or-flight response, compassionate touch provokes much more ambivalence. for example, when sintas reaches out to take his hand, he initially "dreads" it—yet, when she actually touches him, the text tells us, "He needed her to let go of his hand; but he didn't want her to." similarly, though fett seems to express relief that mirta isn't the type to hug him or take his hand, in the very previous book, we seem to have evidence contrary to all parts of this statement. namely, mirta places her hand in his to reassure him when he's undergoing a very painful treatment for his fucked-up-clone-DNA disease, and his reaction is to immediately take her hand and, when the doctor starts lining up the needle, to squeeze it with such force that mirta "thought he'd break every bone in her fingers." these do not read as the reactions of someone who is averse to touch, but rather, someone who is actually quite touch-starved.

(note that it is not at all uncommon for fett's actions/emotional responses to be at odds with the image he projects. he is not at all a reliable narrator of his own internal experience. for example, at one point he claims to not feel ashamed of anything he's ever done, despite the fact that we see him explicitly grappling with feelings of deep, paralyzing shame for how he treated sintas. beviin even teases him for this habit at one point, responding to fett's claims of professional detachment in the face of his obvious care for others with a cheeky, "'course, i believe you 😉")

furthermore, as we see with mirta, fett can get downright clingy when he's worried about someone. in revelation, fett and mirta both take part in a mission that eventually forces them to split up into separate strike teams. fett is, to put it mildly, rather anxious about this. he fears that something will happen to mirta when she's on her own, and that furthermore, it will be his fault for agreeing to take her along on the mission in the first place. significantly, the separation is book-ended by two instances of fett physically grabbing mirta. first, when mirta begins to climb up into the other part of the ship, fett grabs her by the ankle to try and slow her departure, a result, we're told of his "sudden fear for her." he doesn't let go until she shakes him off. later on, when they're reunited, with mirta covered in someone else's (though fett isn't yet aware of this) blood, jaina observes that he grabs her tightly by the shoulder "as if he was going to shake the daylights out of her." both of these reactions seem to be purely instinctive and visceral; it seems fett's first, kneejerk reaction to the fear of losing someone is to physically grab and hold onto them. again, his actions don't align with the detached, touch-averse image he sometimes portrays.

finally, the characters who know fett best seem to know to offer physical reassurance in the face of painful/distressing situations. specifically, we see beviin and mirta offer physical touch as reassurance; beviin places his hand on fett's back when he's watching sintas suffer from carbonite thawing sickness and is anxiously waiting to see whether her mind is still intact, and, as mentioned above, mirta places her hand in his when he's receiving treatment for his genetic disease. and that's not to even mention how sintas's first reaction to seeing him in emotional turmoil is to try and take his hand. for all that fett tries to put on a distant, untouchable facade, the characters he cares about most and vice-versa can see through it within the text itself.

in conclusion, i feel like if a character he cared about actually hugged him, fett's reaction would be something along the lines of this image:

thank you for coming to my tedtalk

[hadesoftheladies]

great foremothers, save me from ever being what a man would delightedly call "wife"

[treedaddymcpuffpuff]

.

[the-meme-monarch]

no offense but maybe instead of telling me to clean a coffee cup over and over and just sitting there why don't you. just clean it your fucking self

[conanssummerchild]

ive decided to do 1 thing every day that makes me irrationally anxious to prove to myself that its not a big deal, and shaking and quaking i have made it through day two 🫡 i was on the verge of crying but im so pleased with myself i never wouldve done this two years ago is this healing

[hwanwooyoung]

ateez covering "pretty u" at their fanmeet like they really did this for me 😭😭😭

[x] [x] [x] [x] [x]

bonus: baby ateez covering "pretty u" [x] [x] [x]

BONUS: FULL YOUTUBE VERSION 💖💖 [x]

[lord-shitbox]

stopped crying so I thought my antidepressant kicked in but no I just ran out of sadness temporarily 🤞 holy shit im miserable

[katyspersonal]

What does Dark Souls fandom ship.....?

Okay so... me and @val-of-the-north arrived to an unhappy conclusion that Dark Souls trilogy doesn't have 'legit' yuri ships?

Like I know that any yuri ship is valid because in Soulsborne we hardly get any lore so it DOES lay on our imagination, but hear me out; in Bloodborne and Elden Ring fandoms we have many "staple" ships such as Mariadeline, Finlenia, Yurimposter, Nephelika, Rom x Ebrietas, Rom x Yurie, Rennala x Marika (canon too), Henriett x Amelia, those two Nox women that put the first puppet experiment on themselves. Even Eileen x Doll, Ariadella, Maria x Doll, Annalise x Maria or Imposter x Iosefka @ all those Ranni x Melina tier ER ships when you go to the dark side. Even rareships like Maria x (female) Izzy, Maria x Eileen, Rom x (female) Caryll, Gratia x Maria, Kos x Flora or Wet Nurse x Queen Yharnam don't really make you question! And new ships keep popping up!

But with Dark Souls trilogy it's like.. *cicada noises*

It is either a crossover ship with another Soulsborne game (Maria x Friede is THE example), or a very random ship that doesn't have any substance/justification besides literally put two women together and Thats It (either porn addict reasons or spite FOR those porn addict reasons). I am not really sure, either 1) actually Dark Souls trilogy fandom has genuine yuri ships that are neither crossover or random but I am unaware and need to socialise with DS fans more ( @heraldofcrow let me know as the only member of Lore Council who isn't ridiculously asocial),

or 2) Dark Souls simply IS crafted like this with timeline and contexts so that one can't instantly deduce a genuine yuri ship, in WHICH case there is only ONE thing I can do to improve the situation:

[volosdarling]

Hi, Ino! I love your art! I feel I should ask, how would you feel about receiving asks from a Volo fictive?

HI, THANK YOU!

IF YOURE JUST SENDING ASKS PLATONICALLY, OF COURSE THATS FINE

IF YOURE GONNA LEAVE IN-CHARACTER NOTES, ID BE HAPPY TO RECEIVE THEM, BUT OFC IT SHOULD JUST BE ROLEPLAY ON BOTH ENDS ^^

[conkreetmonkey]

also congrats on them shiny new pronounce, they look good on you <3

thx :) not 100% positive how hard I want to commit to a whole new identity, some days they fill me with glee and some days they feel weird... it's complicated. I'm very glad I've taken the first step though, and very very glad everyone's been so supportive!

[cherryblossomshadow]

AITA | For teaching my son a lesson for saying "Household chores are women's work"?

Expatriarch

Transcript:

AITAH for teaching my son after lesson and throwing him out after he said household chores are a woman's job? I (34M) got a 16 year old son with my ex (34F) … We split up after I caught her "cheating" … and divorced 2 years ago. Now everything is very good between us and I even consider her a friend … And, credit where credit is due, she was a remarkable homemaker and an amazing mother. When we divorced, I had to learn all of this on my own. It was the first time I realised how much work goes into maintaining a house, I'm embarrassed to admit it, but I had to look up YouTube tutorials on how to clean and cook. A few weeks ago, I was ironing me and my sons clothes and told him that I want to teach him how to do this, as I don't want him falling into the same mistake I did and never learning this on my own. He said he doesn't want to and I just said he'll have to learn to do this at some point. He then said "only failed men do stuff like this and I won't be one of them." I stopped and looked up a bit bewildered and asked him to clarify. He said that it is his belief that this is a woman's job to do and that only simps do simple household chores. I tried to keep my composure as much as I could but asked if he saw me as a simp and he just shrugged. I told him that now he will have to choose his next words very carefully but I said that he will learn household work weather he likes it or not. He again reiterate what he said and I said well, if you think this is a woman's job, it's time for you to live with a woman and to pack his bag and to go to his mom's house, as I will not have any of that Andrew Tate bullshit in my house. … Surprisingly she's on my side and has just asked me to drop him off at hers and she'll help teaching him a lesson. It's been about 2 weeks now that he lives with his mom, and she has been reinforcing the household chores on him. He's called me multiple times to apologise and asking me to come back, his mom and I agreed he's going to stick this up for a week or 2 after the holidays, and make him commute to school and do lesser household chores; and them let him come back to me to reinforce the consequence of his "belief"

Expatriarch: Now, very clearly, he's not. Though, he recognizes he should have taught his son much earlier. And that sending him to his ex-wife’s is yet another example of women having to bear the brunt of shouldering the emotional and physical labor of teaching men how to be self-sufficient individuals

But it amazes me the entitled worldview that young men are being raised to. That the moment they step out from under their parents into the world, there's some woman waiting instantly to drop in his life, cook, clean, and do all his chores for him. That none of this is his concern, and it can all be filed away as women's work. That women exist solely to just sit patiently in the wings until called for by a man – any man – overjoyed that she can finally fulfill her purpose in life, devoting hers to cleaning up after him

It reminds me of the video I did of the proud masculine men of the Daily Wire, bragging that they haven't done chores in years, and that they wouldn't be able to figure out how to do laundry, even if their lives actually depended on it. Being incompetent is not a flex. Being helpless is not a flex. It's yet another way that these arbitrary and stupid gender roles are so incredibly dangerous. It dehumanizes and devalues women, reducing them to just domestic servants. And it cripples men, making them lack basic life skills that leave them disadvantaged and miserable, reducing adult men to inapt toddlers. But it also reiterates a sense of shame, disgust, and worthlessness to being single. “Only failed men do stuff like this.”

The reality is men who are capable of doing their own domestic labor are far more attractive. When I asked women, “Why are you single?” and got over a 100 stitches in response, the universal answer was that they were tired of doing all the domestic labor. Of having a man who felt it was “women's work” and not doing their share.

For the majority of us, when we leave the family home, our first experience will be living with roommates. Complete strangers who will expect you to clean up after yourself and take care of yourself. There may be a rotation for household chores, and you will be expected to pitch in. And if you don't, if you breeze through life thinking that household chores are everyone else's problem, then those roommates will hate you and likely no longer want to live with you. And if you treat your spouse or romantic partner this way, then don't be surprised when they too will hate you and no longer want to live with you.

With my own teenage son, he does all his own laundry, he cooks all his own meals, and he's learning more recipes from me, so that he's more self-sufficient. It's important, not just for building his self-confidence, his sense of responsibility, and control over his own life, but also so that he's not a burden on others.

And the thing is, men totally understand this. When we talk about these skills outside of the home, as wilderness survival skills, it's seen as something incredibly desirable, something to be proud of. To be self-sufficient, to rely only on yourself, to not be a burden on others. But inside the home, well then, men revert to the status of children, taking no responsibility for their own welfare and expecting someone else to follow them around and clean up after them. That's if they even acknowledge that work at all and don't just believe the magic laundry fairy does it all. Domestic labor is work, necessary work that never ends. It's not something you just help with now and again. It is something you need to actively participate in, to plan for and work at throughout your entire life, whether you live alone, with roommates, or with a romantic partner. If you want to be seen as mature, dependable, successful, and able to make an impact on this world, then you need to start by making an impact on your immediate environment by taking ownership and pride in it and being responsible for the household chores. Expecting someone else to do all that work for you is a sign that you lack maturity, lack respect for others, struggle with responsibility and accountability and are generally a miserably selfish person to be around. And you get to choose which of those types of men you want to be