#i am now legally an adult. i did not consent to having adult responsibilities

[solidwater05]

[ID: The word "birth" written in all-lowercase comic sans, followed by a full stop and a party popper emoji. /End ID]

yay.

[listenheresweaty]

Reminder that Stirringjuice/Ven themself has said that TMC is not fetish content. Kister’s works are NOT an extension of what was described in the allegations document. If you don’t want to consume TMC content anymore, fine (best you don’t— not in a way that gives Kister money anyway), but don’t spread misinformation.

EDIT: after rereading Ven’s callout document and finally being able to access ALL the screenshots he attached, I have decided that I will no longer support him. I will not go back to supporting Alex Kister yet, but I cannot support a blatant ableist transphobe either. link to annotation doc: (not mine) https://docs.google.com/document/d/e/2PACX-1vReErDatnpQ_h3W-WlqrmzmPN26-UyDwLVwBKmHV09WhVZtdZQM44HRxvoV0ZTz8Ho-NaBVKYxjNuha/pub

Things I will be addressing:

Why I do not support Ven (separate from other victims)

Stuff that Alex Kister DID do wrong, even if the allegations were exaggerated/faked/done out of malice

The allegations and victims themselves.

WHY I DONT SUPPORT VEN

First of all, this ⬇️ (scroll down its below the blue highlighted ss. Formatting issues sorry.). This is a ss of Ven’s (now deleted, now archived post) response to how many people are calling him transphobic for his transmisogynistic comments in his document, and how he had basically outed Alex. Instead of saying something like “it wasn’t transphobic — I had to out Alex— it was necessary for the victims/proof/whatever”, Ven just says that if Alex didn’t want to be outed or subjected to transphobia, he shouldn’t have been a “groomer” (Ven later says that he had misused the word “groomer”. Everyone that Alex had interacted with in a sexual or romantic manner had been an adult, and had fully explicitly VERBALLY consented.)

However. Even if your opponent is a bad person, you do NOT have the right to be transphobic. EVER. criticize them on whatever they’ve done wrong, hold them accountable in a balanced and civilized manner— etc. Being protected from bigotry/ not getting misgendered, privacy, legal counsel— these are all examples of RIGHTS.

When you start denying something based on whether someone deserves it or not, that “something” has become a privilege. By stating that his transphobia was excused because Alex is a supposedly bad person, Ven has stated that not being subjected to transphobia is a privilege. here’s the link: (takes forever to load the keep reading portion but it works for me) https://web.archive.org/web/20240317125855/https://www.tumblr.com/stirringjuicee/745117180204548096/alex-kister-and-actively-using-being-trans-to-lure

Screenshot of the post below, along with something from the callout doc (annotated by a tumblr user. The non-highlighted color text is the annotated bit.

—— ss from ven response (click. It IS An image it just looks like text)

—- now onto some more details.

Ven, or StirringJuice, made the first allegations document against Alex Kister. He had stated himself that he does not consider himself a victim, just a friend of the victims who wanted to spread the word. Ven starts the document off by describing his past relationship with Alex Kister. He also includes screenshots of text messages from Alex— which often contradict or have no relation with what he’s saying. This is why it’s important to look at the screenshots, guys! Most of the toxicity in Ven’s relationship with Alex stemmed from Ven’s refusal to honestly his boundaries or feelings. He told Alex that he was comfortable with the sexual comments, he told Alex that he was comfortable being just Friends with Benefits, and he told Alex that they were welcome to vent to him any time <- all of this is corroborated by the text screenshots that Ven himself posted.

In Ven’s text messages, we can see him suggesting that Alex gets a therapist. Great! Nothing wrong there. And then you actually look at the ss:

(Ven is the blue. These ss are linked in the callout document.)

First of all. You cannot force ANYONE to get mental help, regardless of whether you think it’s for their own well-being. If their behavior is harming you, leave. But even the worst people on earth deserve autonomy for these kinds of things. Ven literally states that he had FORCED Alex to get a therapist, and you can see him admit it in the messages above as well.

after these ss links (labeled part 9 in the doc), Ven hits us with this absolute banger:

“[Alex] then decided to go off his meds.”

Someone had already said this, but: YOU HAVE NO RIGHT TO SAY THAT TO OR ABOUT A MENTALLY ILL PERSON. EVER. REGARDLESS OF WHO YOU ARE, OR WHO THEY ARE. it’s an insult to every mental health community.

^ also, Alex gives a pretty good reason for going off his medication. Not that they needed to.

^highlighted text is Ven’s callout post. Purple text is a fellow tumblr user’s annotations. They have a whole post with these annotations. I’ll credit them when I’m done writing out my post. [clarification: the annotator uses “she/her” pronouns for Alex, Ven uses he/him. I use they/them because Alex was never publicly OUT as she/her before they were outed, so I’m not sure what to do]

Also: please go on the callout doc and see the “pt. 11” screenshots yourself. There’s a lot of them and I don’t want to add them here, but please go see them.

^Ven hears that Alex wants to start a new chapter with them (yknow, like redeem the toxic relationship they’ve had) and immediately assumes it’s in the romantic sense.

^Alex admits that they are not ready for a committed relationship, a good first step for smoothing over any toxicity.

^nothing else to add. Annotator did great.

^ text ss as listed under the “pt. 14” link

These are 3 out of 10 ss under the Pt. 15 link. Look at the text indicated to with the red arrow (drawn by me). Ven literally tells Alex that they “don’t understand anything ever.” They also tell Alex in a later ss (plz find it yourselves because I’m not posting all 10 photos) that they “don’t understand [their] own emotions.”

Maybe Alex was making an unhealthy decision by continuing to reach out to someone they clearly had an unhealthy relationship with. But these responses are borderline abusive, especially when aimed at someone who suffers from paranoia.

A huge chunk of the entire callout doc is Ven venting about his relationship with Alex. This relationship is not abusive, it is toxic on both sides. The fact that Ven put this much focus on these barely relevant details— even when the topic was the victims, not Ven himself— suggests that he did this out of petty vindictiveness. If the allegations are true, the victims deserved a BETTER PERSON and a BETTER FRIEND to share their story. Not someone who did it purely because it was en excuse to get revenge. If it wasn’t revenge, why add all these details?? (funny thing— the whole doc. Would be more believable if Ven hadn’t added all this stuff. He destroyed his credibility before even getting to the allegations).

the one below has more transphobia and general assholery than ableism.

^apparently once you are out of the closet, you are not allowed to go back or feel ashamed. Else you are lying and manipulative. Thanks, Ven.

I am done posting screenshots from the annotation document. Please, PLEASE read it in full. I will tag it in the comments. There are so so so many good points.

STUFF THAT ALEX HAS DEFINITELY DONE WRONG, REGARDLESS OF WHETHER THE ALLEGATIONS ARE TRUE OR FALSE:

(Orange text is annotator, black is original doc).

Venting to/ Relying on a minor fan for mental health support (I think it was Mitchie). That’s not good.

making allusions to suicide during their relationship with Ven. Joke or not, that’s unhealthy.

ALLEGATIONS/VICTIMS:

wont say much here because I’m getting tired. some people on Reddit have been pointing out that some discord ss (not the ones I’ve shown you, those were imessage ss) look faked because there is use of military time, which is not an option on discord apparently. Other screenshots seem to use different fonts as well, further indicating forged evidence. I have fact-checked none of this and can’t verify it (not that you should be relying on my word alone, anyway).

I do not support Mitchie, since they’ve been telling people to self-harm and/or commit suicide when they point out flaws in the callout doc. I don’t care what you’ve been through. There is no excuse for that.

As for the other victims.. I find their statements fishy. However, I will not disbelieve them until more has been cleared up.

[ingek73]

FACT & REPORTAGE

#MediaToo & The Crisis in British Journalism

MailOnline and The Sun Hid Serious Dan Wootton Claims – While Attacking Huw Edwards and the BBC

In the fifth part of our three-year special investigation into the private and professional conduct of GB News star Dan Wootton, Byline Times can reveal how The Sun and MailOnline have been protecting their star celebrity journalist

Dan Evans

28 July 2023

MailOnline knew of serious criminal allegations of a sexual nature about its columnist Dan Wootton in May yet failed to report them to the police and continued to publish his work on five occasions, Byline Times can reveal.

Wootton’s former employer The Sun also failed to report the same detailed allegations to the police despite knowing about them since at least 7 June 2023 – a month before running a controversial front page about a BBC presenter lawfully paying for sexual images.

The matter was reported to the publications by a former male adult entertainer whom Wootton employed to help him catfish men of sexual interest and secretly record them in their homes having sex.

A further allegation was also made, and is known by both newspapers – details of which we are unable to report at this time.

The man told Byline Times: “The Mail said they couldn’t touch the story as Wootton worked for them. They said it sounded like a very serious criminal matter, and said that I should go to the police – which I did.

“I also told The Sun about it and the fact that Wootton had paid one of my colleagues for sex work from their own accounts by pretending he was a source on a story about Amber Heard. They also told me to report it to the police. So, I did that in June.”

Neither publication has since reported at all on the three-year special investigation into the personal and professional conduct of Wootton that Byline Times started breaking 11 days ago, yet The Sun did cover Wootton’s denials in a 143-word piece on 20 July. News UK, its publisher, has since set up an internal inquiry and MailOnline has unofficially ‘paused’ Wootton’s column.

However, the failure of publishers Associated Newspapers Ltd and News UK Ltd to act sooner is attracting strong criticism, given both took aim at the BBC during the same period for its handling of the Huw Edwards affair.

“The fact that Dan Wootton’s employers and previous employers knew of allegations against him and did nothing for at least six weeks before Byline Times started reporting them means that the public interest here is not just on his alleged actions but their actions too as supposedly responsible publishers and employers,” Paul Wragg, Professor of Media Law at the University of Leeds, told this newspaper.

‘I Was Really Surprised they Didn’t Seem Interested’

Today, in the latest part of Byline Times’ #MediaToo investigation into abuses of power in publishing and broadcasting, we can reveal how the ex-adult entertainer first contacted MailOnline on 29 May amid a mounting scandal about the former ITV This Morning presenter Philip Schofield and his lawful relationship with a younger man he worked with.

In a subsequent email to MailOnline on 31 May, the man – who we are not naming for legal reasons – wrote: “After Philip Schofield, the next one on This Morning who should be investigated is Dan Wootton [the presenter previously worked on the magazine show].

“I am an ex-porn star and escort. I have worked for Dan on several occasions. The things he has asked me to do were illegal. He used to ask us to film others without their consent… He also used to pay myself and others to use our Facebooks [profiles] and message who he wanted us to encounter with. How much for a story like this? I have more information on him.”

Wootton has denied any allegations of criminality.

The complainant has since told Byline Times that his interactions with the now GB News star, left him suicidal and living a chaotic life of self-medicating drug use and mental trauma.

Communications with MailOnline continued until this Wednesday, 26 July, during which the man says he was told it could not consider reporting on Wootton because he was an employee of Associated Newspapers.

“After that, I went to The Sun and told them about Wootton and the Amber Heard stuff – evidence of which they obviously have on their own account system. After lots of calls, they just said it was for the police to deal with, not them.

“They said there wasn’t any evidence, even though I was directly involved. I even told them the name of the accounts person who dealt with it. I was really surprised they didn’t seem interested.”

Byline Times has verified the email and other communications with MailOnline and can confirm that at least eight phone calls were made to and from The Sun newsdesk between 7 June and 27 July about Wootton, who last night was still presenting a prime-time show on GB News.

The Huw Edwards Parallel

During this period, both MailOnline and The Sun broke stories about Huw Edwards, who is no longer on air for the BBC and has been receiving help, according to his wife, with “serious mental health issues”.

In a defence of its articles about Edwards, which have been heavily criticised, The Sun wrote in a comment piece on 13 July: “A desperate couple approached us with firm evidence that he was paying large sums to a young person with a spiralling drug addiction – and that the star had been sent sexual pictures.

“But police said nothing could be done and, despite a detailed complaint to the BBC, it did nothing either. What do our critics, especially Mr Edwards’ pious media friends, think we should have done? Told the family to shove off? Turned a blind eye to what appeared to be a clear abuse of power by a household name… ?”

MailOnline has been similarly critical of the BBC for posing as the “moral conscience of the nation” over the Edwards saga.

On Wednesday, its columnist Brendan O’Neill wrote: “Their authoritarian urge to elevate certain stories and diminish others robs ordinary people of the right to know what is really happening in this country. There is nothing ‘virtuous’ about it. On the contrary: these are the despotic antics of people who think they should have the power to control the flow of information itself.”

For Prof Wragg, “Dan Wootton has set himself up as a moral arbiter whose job it is to condemn others for moral flaws – and that means that his own moral flaws are a matter of clear public interest”.

“He is a man who has been instrumental in exposing the highly sensitive details of the private lives of many people in public life, including the television presenter Philip Schofield and the musical entertainer Duncan James,” he told Byline Times.

“He’s made a career out of subjecting others to vitriol but now seems to want the protection of the law as a matter of privacy and defamation now that his own alleged actions are being subjected to scrutiny.”

He added: “During this precise time-frame, The Sun was breaking a big story about the BBC News anchor Huw Edwards and it seems extraordinary that they would not have taken the opportunity to refer the serious allegations against Mr Wootton to the police themselves.

“At the very least, this inaction and the decision by MailOnline to allow Mr Wootton to continue to publish columns under its name seriously undermines the moral stance it has taken by criticising the BBC’s conduct in relation to Mr Edwards.

“It also undermines their credibility as a serious news organisation. This is a clear ethical failing that IPSO, the press complaints handler, should investigate given that it claims to uphold high editorial standards.”

Wootton has written five columns for MailOnline since the man first contacted it with his allegations.

In one column on 30 May, Wootton discussed Philip Schofield, saying: “I would have thought in this day and age that a mainstream broadcaster such as ITV ought to be seen to be doing all it can to deal with issues like this, find out where the truth lies and, in the meantime, suspend those who the rumours concern.”

Wootton also called for “the truth, this time; not the saccharin fairy-tale Schofield offered up on the sofa to an unsuspecting British public”.

In a follow-up column on 15 June, Wootton wrote of ITV’s treatment of the Schofield affair: “As a result of this cover-up and PR disaster that has followed, many loyal viewers will never trust This Morning or the channel its broadcast on again.”

Byline Times put a series of questions connected to this article to News UK and Associated Newspapers but received no response. This newspaper will update this article if it does.

A spokesperson for the Metropolitan Police said: “In June 2023, the Metropolitan Police was contacted with regards to allegations of sexual offences committed by a man. Officers are assessing information to establish whether any criminal offence has taken place. There is no police investigation at this time.”

Dan Evans is a former colleague of Dan Wootton’s from the News of the World. None of the sources in this article were paid for their testimony

-

Earlier stories(see link below)

[silvaurum]

i keep having thoughts about wanting to move out of my family apartment, and i think whats frustrating me most is a lack of actionable steps i can take to sort of address the thoughts. because even like, a studio apartment would be minimum $800 for 300 square feet, which is my entire part-time paycheck, so no money for food, internet, electric, running water, a bed, etc. and maybe i could navigate the absolute hellscape of emergency very low income resources, but uhhh. i don't wanna do something that hard for something that's non-urgent. esp when there are other people who actually need those resources and cannot just kinda huff, roll eyes, and carry on in a free bed and eat free groceries. like, sometimes i think it would be less work to just do it all myself, but i know it would not be. it might feel like less work at first because i wouldn't need to account for anyone but myself. but it wouldn't actually be less work.

and i can recognize the root causes of why i'm unhappy and frustrated and keep having the 'i want to leave, i gotta get out of here' thoughts. i'm frustrated by unspoken and unwanted expectations, and i don't like being forced into a position of making decisions for other people or having to plan and think about the living arrangements and restrictions that come with herding <four whole people and a dog now>

i really hate the feeling that i am expected to take care of my sibling as if they were my own child and legal responsibility, because no one else 'wants to' do the hard thing and learn and communicate. i did not have the sex that conceived this person, i did not give birth or get married or make anyone a promise that i would care for this infant as they grew into an adult;

and at NO point did i ever consent to being their surrogate parent, and especially not for the rest of my life. that's not even something i feel i can meaningfully consent to in general which is why i'm not getting christian married ever. i can't know or promise that an eternal commitment is actually feasible, desirable, within my daily capabilities, and at the top of my priorities to the point that i am willing to sacrifice my own wants or needs to prioritize the idea of that eternal commitment. lmao no.

(if i get 'married' it will be a symbolic non-legal gesture and i will be wifeing my damn self. i deserve that shit more than anyone else in the world. only exception would be a non-binding year and a day marriage with no legal sway. those are cool. i'd be down for that with someone i really loved. but marriage as its depicted in the waspy mainstream? lmao. rofl.)

anyway i'm tired. my point is that i wanna go for a hike and maybe just disappear before anyone can pin any responsibilities on me

[pers-eids]

i miss my mommy.

i’m twenty-two years old, and i miss my mommy.

maybe it’s because i’m finally moving out, moving on, and this is the last chapter of my childhood that is left, and it’s ending. it’s ending, but not of my own volition; i would stay young forever, if i could, and watch over my brother and sister while they play, and make simplistic lunches for the three of us, because the responsibility always fell to me, and i could try to protect them better than i did. than i have.

i miss being four, before the first of my siblings was born, and knowing with absolute certainty that my mother was mine; that she loved me, that i was her little girl, that she was my mom and nobody else’s. i wasn’t especially jealous as a child—i never fought for her attention, not that i remember, because i was old enough to understand that a baby was the priority. i wasn’t jealous, or overly dramatic, but there came a time in my childhood when the responsibilities of a mother were pushed on to me, and suddenly i was to nurture, to comfort, to protect. she fed them, changed diapers, played out the legal requirements that come with parenthood; all the physical things i couldn’t do because i was too young. i’m convinced if i’d been older then that would’ve been part of my role as well: to provide. suddenly i was all of these things, and the mother that i’d previously had just…disappeared. it wasn’t like she’d never existed, because i saw her here and there in smaller increments, but the mother that i grew up knowing—that held my hand and dolled me up and dropped me off at preschool and raised me the way only a mother ever really could—she wasn’t mine anymore.

i learned about sex in elementary school, as was apparently common amongst my peers, and i knew the word ‘rape’ at nine or ten. what i should’ve known, if my mother hadn’t been so negligent, was that the game i’d been talked into playing several times with the neighbor girl my age was actually assault. my understanding of rape at so young an age was that it was always violent, and it was always done by men to women. i had absolutely no idea that what my little neighbor had done was considered rape. no idea whatsoever. my grandmother, the one on my dad’s side, had always made it clear that children should know the in’s and out’s of their bodies. my christian mother had always despised the idea, just as she despised my father’s mother, and sometimes i want to blame her for what happened to me. if she hadn’t been such a goddamned prude, if she had only explained what intimacy was, and that it was only ever done by consenting adults, i know i likely would have told someone before i completely lost my chance.

then, of course, there’s the events that have occurred between my mother and the other members of my family. there’s the abuse, the narcissism, the neglect, the gaslighting, the hate speech. there’s my two younger siblings who look to me as their mother, who’ve accidentally called me ‘mom’, who have no emotional connection to her. there’s the time she hurt them, the meals they’ve gone without, the danger she’s put them in. there’s my dad, who was a victim to her reign of terror, who loved her despite it, who looks at her now and sees nothing of the woman he loved but still feels guilt for talking badly about. there’s the years of trauma that i am still trying to unpack, to make sense of; screaming matches, weapons being pulled, hissed voices, threats, flinches, hate, hate, hate. there’s the way my mother looks at me like i’m delusional, like i will never know myself the way i claim to, like it’s absurd i ever could. there’s the life i stripped from her by being born, whether it was her choice or not, and the fact that i am two years older than she was when she had me.

i miss my mommy. i regret so much, for the both of us, because a part of me still loves her, will always love her, even through all the pain i have had to endure because of her choices. i no longer believe in god, but i pray for her to whoever will listen, because i know when she prays for me it is with a name i no longer use. i pray she finds herself again, and spends the rest of her life begging my forgiveness, because i want her. i want her to love me, to like me, to see me; it is a type of want that fills up the black, rotted mass of weakened muscle behind my broken ribs, and it is far too great a beast to ignore. i want my mommy. i miss her. it’s as simple a statement as anything, yet i cannot dare to confess it to her face, much less utter it from the tongue she made me.

e.p

[o0sketchy-girl0o]

Hi hi 👋

❤️ 5'10 or 5'11 last I checked?

🧡 Lesbian!

💛 i can talk about string theory for hours on end if you don't stop me like literally watch-

💚 New England

~ My dog who may or may not be high on sharpie fumes

💙 My little closet demon brother I love him

💜 clueless, smart, funnyish, weird... ✨autistic✨

~ QUANTUM PHYSICIST 🫦😩

🖤 q-q-q-q-QUANTUM PHYSI- ok I'll stop

🎂 July 24!

🌙 um um um um uhhhhhh can i just say leo because i looked at a guide and it was confusing as sheep

💉 Ear piercings, the lobe ones!

🚗 Nerp. I'm a) not of legal age and b) a coward when it comes to being responsible of this big ahh thing on wheels on a road of other things on wheels that could decide to high five my car at any moment

✈️ huhhh I've gotta say maybe Paris? we went to London, Edinburgh and Paris for my birthday this year :D

🎤 probably, but nothing really comes to mind rn lol. exploding to go to the ashnikko concert tho 🤩

🎵 Ashnikko rn 😈✨

🎧 Veera Raja Veera by AR Rahman and a bunch of other people it SLAPS in 8d theatre audio

📺 Helluva boss? or a true crime series with my mom? I forgot lol

📝 Like a story? this book I'm working on that I reeeeeally wanna publish it's gonna be called Grey Matter and it's a psychological horror WHEEEEE

🔐 If I haven't opened my mouth yet, then that I'm autistic lmao 🤷‍♀️

🧟‍♀️ I almost got kidnapped like a bunch of times, and one time a guy who tried to kidnap me was killed by police two weeks after the incident, crazy story. It wasn't rlly scary tho. more like shocking. lmao.

🔥 Wait I could've just written the last one here 😧

🍓 uhhhrhrhrhrhmmmmm right now probably soft serve ice cream

🍅 i would cry if someone tried to feed me anything on my bad texture list

🍊 the transition from spring to summer<3333

🍋 Horror

🍐 wuhhhh uh uh uh ummm @ryemackerel's good au william afton

🫐 Norway :D

🍇 painfully oblivious

🍒 It's a very vivid memory of before I could walk (I'm thinking 4-5 months old) and I was crawling towards the prayer area and I was wearing this pink frilly shirt and holding a ladybug toy and the house smelled like sandalwood and there was this one specific prayer song playing idk my memory is weird

🍌 ✨social skills✨

💌 to post my doodles (CONTENT COMING SOON I SWEAR 😭)

✏️ definitely when my fnaf era started lmaooo

🖇️ I haven't gotten any asks yet 🥲 guys pls send me asks, strangers, friends, pornbots (wait what) please i'm lonelyyy

📚 when an idea plagues my brain and it nags me until i put it down on paper

📌 🫥 well, you see I haven't posted any stories or fics of mine-

🔍 a very babygirlified william afton (mostly crack stories)

🖊️ any character I don't think is angstworthy (very rigid standards)

💔 [war flashbacks] uh so i uh it's uh so there was this gravity falls thing and uh I deleted it thank dog but uhhh

❤️‍🔥 @skeletoninthemelonland's ballora huh what wha I didn't say anything what

🧚‍♀️ When I say william afton I would like to clarify that I am not a simp i just think he has very cool lore. anyway, william, tomura shigaraki, hunter from toh, and Ben gross from never have I ever. any questions?

🪐 toh, helluva boss, i forgor the rest 🙃

🌝 the owl house

🌚 any show that supports an immoral cause, idk, I don't watch a whole lot of those :)

🌹 I've never written that kind of stuff but I support anyone who does!

🥀 i don't plan on writing a whole bunch of that but erm consent is sexy

🌊 oh, I don't really have any of those. what i know is that there are many safe platforms online to find your people to share your creativity with, so if you guys are worried about that kinda thing, i encourage you to find your space.

❄️ I LITERALLY HAVE DEVELOPED THIS ENTIRE 3 SEASONS LONG SERIES IN MY HEAD ABOUT MY FNAF AU THAT'S ROTATING IN MY BRAIN CONSTANTLY

☂️ hmmmm there are a lot. one that I think of is this on AO3 by serpentauthor. it's funny :)

A couple of in depth questions!

🍄 well I have a few personal ones and a few less personal ones. I guess I would've liked to appreciate things more when I was younger.

���️ well, I published a book when I was 8. it's not that special lmao ik y'all have done better but it's the first thing i thought of for this question.

~ Depression. Guys, talking about it really helps, I promise! stay safe<3

🌺 I REALLY LIKED MY TRIP TO EUROPE FOR MY BIRTHDAY THAT WAS SO FUN

🍀 any lighthearted show I can watch with my brother cause it feels nostalgic.

bye bye! 👋

Get to Know Me!

This is just a fun little thing I’ve been wanting to do since the dawn of time but could never find a post to reblog that satisfied what I wanted. So I made this, feel free to reblog and use it yourself!

❤️ how tall are you?

🧡 what is your sexuality?

💛 what is your favorite feature on yourself?

💚 where are you from?

🩵 do you have any pets?

💙 do you have any siblings?

💜 describe yourself in five words or less!

🩷 dream job?

🖤 favorite hobbies outside of your blog

🎂 when is your birthday?

🌙 your zodiac (Sun, Moon, Rising)

💉do you have tattoos and/or piercings

🚗 can you drive?

✈️ favorite place you’ve traveled

🎤 have you been to a concert

🎵 favorite artists

🎧 last song you listened too

📺 last show you watched

📝 last thing you wrote

🔐 something no one would guess about you

🧟‍♀️ scariest thing that’s happened to you

🔥 craziest thing that’s ever happened to you

🍓 favorite food

🍅 least favorite food

🍊 favorite season?

�� favorite genre to read / watch / write

🍐 if you could make one character real, who would it be

🫐 some place you’d love to visit

🍇 a word your friends would use to describe you

🍒 what is your earliest memory

🍌 what is one talent you wish you had

💌 why did you start this blog?

✏️ when did you start writing fanfic

🖇️ what are your favorite asks to answer

📚 how do you come up with the fics you write

📌 what is the fic you’re know for

🔍 what character do you enjoy writing for the most

🖊️ what character do you not enjoy writing for

💔 is there a fic you wish you didn’t write

❤️‍🔥 what character do you simp for most often

🧚‍♀️ favorite characters of all time

🪐 favorite shows / series of all time

🌝 a show you would recommend to anyone

🌚 a show you’d tell people to stay away from

🌹 favorite kinks to write for

🥀 kinks you would never write for

🌊 a kink you would like to write but you think you’d be judged

❄️ full fics, imagines or head canons

☂️ your favorite fanfic from another writer

A couple of in depth questions!

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🌺 what is the best gift someone has ever given you and why is it so important

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[collymore]

One sexually impetuous act by me doesn't make me a slut, irretrievably!

By Stanley Collymore

Yes, I was foolhardy to do what I did; but just as there was no coercion on my sexual lover's part to, at any cost, bed me, there likewise was no calculatedly cunning conspiracy on my own either to obviously ensure that he did and perfectly frankly and honestly what evidently happened between us consensually really came about both naturally and spontaneously. True to say I had long promised myself that I would really, never sexually involve myself heterosexually, for really it is what I unquestionably am, with any member of the male sex until I was over 18 and even then it would just be with somebody I basically knew personally, crucially liked or simply really deeply cared for reciprocally, was evidently, a legally consenting adult; and who were he to be even truly in love with me, nevertheless really respected me sufficiently to sensibly take, my well-known and cherished feelings into his fullest consideration before we crucially actually indulged consensually in mutually compliant adult coition.

Fully confident in myself that this was the way in which I would consciously and willingly lose my virginity, I consequently didn't worry or even think about sex unduly; as there was no real need or actually any reason to as I was just 16, quite clearly, still at school, and earnestly planning on subsequently going on to university. Simply, really the first person effectively amongst any of my family to actually contemplate far less able to do so; as my Gran, I learnt, was clearly obliged to get married as she was simply up the duff when she did so while rather tellingly Mum had me at 15, aptly quite predictably so according to Gran, having readily relinquished   her virginity at the age of just 14, rabid promiscuity on mum's part which undeniably resulted in her being up the stick with me really as the literal consequence of an orgy, that really she was fervidly part of with a group of itinerant, building workers that then were evidently, undeniably employed officially as a workforce and by my Mum to effectively be aptly the routine, ex-tempore sexual commodity, truly appropriately within her prudish community. Relevant individuals simply to Mum but rather obviously not any apparent reciprocation in direct response from them to her, other than the very usual sexual one, that undoubtedly simply left her pregnant with me after they'd literally gone.

Now, despite all my earnest precautions undeniably so to evidently, preclude me from being like either my Gran or Mom, yet in spite of them, there I was plainly pregnant and actually so at simply 16, and essentially quite obviously, not in love with the man, who unmistakably got me so, nor he equally undeniably significantly with me and discernibly with both of us intelligently realizing that any such imposed "consensual" marriage on our part, was really the last thing that either of us evidently wanted, or would itself be distinctly decidedly emotionally beneficial to our individual or irrefutably too our joint future welfare, and effectively therefore, logically and abundantly significantly, quite unquestionably, or very unmistakably also actually be intelligently considered, by any astute person, as a valid solution!

Mom though, ridiculously sought to have the final word by seriously suggesting that this young man, five years my senior, significantly from her clearly narrow perspective in  full employment, and who'd obviously always been quite significantly, crazy about me; feelings, which evidently I did know about I neither specifically encouraged on his part nor actually in any way actually reciprocated on mine. Yet for all that, there was my mother very blatantly, encouraging me to now literally, and undeniably totally brazenly, distinctively make essentially unconcealed amorous overtures towards him effectively and very immediately afterwards, followed by my distinct seducing of him; evidently unquestionably, simply letting him ignorantly and ardently take the bait which was on offer; with him becoming not only a loving and fittingly dutiful husband, but also an amenable, malleable and controlled father!

(C) Stanley V. Collymore 4 November 2023.

Author's Remarks: This poem is written about and, rather similarly too, specifically for Yvette - her surname is definitely not essential here, whose express permission I essentially have to do this. Yvette Forster came to my attention when she quite voluntarily joined an extra-curricular group that I'd previously established to facilitate the discarded needs and rather uncatered for abilities of children, debarred from schooling, in my home town and also neighbouring areas. Children that either because of the simply evidently odious and distinctly obvious bigotries they did encounter, were unquestionably awfully shunned because of them and were all connected to their Black race and skin colour, conjoined with similar intense and debilitating prejudices because of their societal environment - take that to quite literally mean white working class and council estate residencies - were they lived, and were more likely to be summarily booted out of the British educational system for so- called anti-social behaviour and the quite usually toxically hyped rigmarole, while similar activities and even worst committed by the public school perceived elites as well as the Middle Class social climbing sycophants will naturally and instantaneously be considered as just "high spirited behaviour"; it was quite obvious to me the Yvette  - who is white - was equally short-changed as all the others, Black and White, who were all part of this extra-curricular group that I'd individually set up.

To fast forward Yvette did exceptionally well and readily integrated with all the other members of the group. Ultimate like many of the others she got a well-deserved place at university where she studied science and subsequently on graduating and with the group's full support went to the USA to do her PhD which she excellently sustained.

Yvette never married her mother's very convenient choice of husband for her, nor the father of her son who manfully did ask her to marry him but she quite candidly refused his offer of marriage, her explanation being, she recounted to me years later, that marriage should be about genuine love and commitment, not convenience. However, her child's father, unlike many in his situation, did commendably and voluntarily accept his paternal responsibilities to his own offspring as well.

While in the USA Yvette did meet and fall in love with a young man she met at university there. He knows the full story of her life, for as the honest person she is, Yvette wanted no secrets of hers hid from him. They're now married, Yvette has her PhD and that lovely son of her is himself at university studying to a doctor; stating that his ultimate aim is to a surgeon.

[hellfiremunsonn]

Steve Freaking Harrington.

AN: ALRIGHT WELL I SAID I WAS WRITING A STEVE FIC AND I REALLY FUCKIN DID. It’s a slow burn so if you just want the smut part you’ll have to scroll for quite a while. I got a little carried away. I’m gunna call it “Part One” for now until I know what or where I'm going with it but I really hope you all enjoy it. Please let me know if there is anything I didn’t tag, or if you have any feedback. 

I do not allow my writing to be republished anywhere other than my own blog without my consent

18 + IF YOU ARE NOT 18 OR OLDER DO NOT READ OR INTERACT WITH MY WRITING. IT IS NOT INTENDED FOR MINORS. I AM NOT RESPONSIBLE FOR THE MEDIA YOU CONSUME.

Word count: 7705

Warnings: blood, talk of self harm, mentions of past self harm scars, fem reader, Dom Steve if you squint, unprotected sex (please always use protection), p in v, m oral receiving, fingering, m an f orgasm

StevexReader 

It was another long and boring day at Family Video. One of those days where I often just stood at the counter shifting my weight from foot to foot staring at the clock and trying to ignore whatever shitty move was playing on the tv behind me. Robin scribbled doodles on a scrap piece of paper and Steve hung around on the other side of the counter, leaning on his elbows with his head in his hands. "This is brutal" Steve said sighing.

"At least you don't have to go to school tomorrow" Robin muttered, still doodling.

I smiled a little. It became so familiar to listen to them bicker back and fourth. They were like an old married couple. "Ahh yes the young child complains about getting her education while not having to pay rent" I said side eyeing her.

"Okay I'm eighteen, which means legally I'm an adult so" she said raising her eyebrows. Steve and I shared a look before laughing.

"Just because you're eighteen doesn't mean you're not a kid, believe me" I thought back when I thought everything would change when I turned eighteen. It's a big deal for no real reason other than legally being an adult. You still can't drink, you're still in high school, and for most people, still living under their parents roof with everything paid for. But in the end you still were a kid who was clueless about the world. I wouldn't go as far to say that about Robin considering how mature she really was despite being as goofy as she is.

"Were you the one who got stuck in a Russian lab, or dungeon? Basement maybe? I'm not even sure what is was, but was that you? No it wasn't" she said crumpling up her doodle filled paper and throwing it at my head.

"Hey!" I sad rubbing my forehead where the crinkled ball had poked me before landing on the floor. "Listen I was probably laying in bed states away blissfully unaware, so no, I can't relate to that" I grabbed the paper ball and threw it into the trash, glancing at the clock again groaning I made my way over to the shelves and started spacing everything way too neatly just to pass time.

About an hour later I was now sitting on the floor still spacing each movie apart but now on the opposite side of the store when Robin came out of the back room loudly swinging her backpack over her shoulder. "Well see ya later losers, have fun closing up" And with a wink she was out the door. I gave her a quick wave and continued my spacing.

"(Y/N)?" Steve called.

"Over here!" I said peaking around one of the shelves.

"Why are you on the floor?" He said standing next to me.

"Because why would I stand up to do the bottom shelf?" I said back. Looking up at him. He was so beautiful. And he knew it, which made him more unbearable because he knew what to do, and when to do it, and who to do it too, so he could get the right reaction out of them. We became friends quite quickly when I started working at Family Video mainly from how much time we spent alone in the empty store, but also because Robin forced him to train me when I started so she wouldn't have to. I definitely don't blame her for that because training the newbie is always kind of boring. Although I had to thank her for that because if it wasn't for her distaste in training I don't know if I would have ever gotten as close to Steve as I have if he wasn't the one spending all that extra time training me.

After a few short months of getting to know Steve and opening up to him. I told him about how my home life wasn't exactly ideal and offered to let me stay in one of his spare bedrooms. His house was massive and his parent's rarely home, not that they minded me. They really liked me actually. I tried to deny Steves offer until one fairly rough night at home got just a little too much. So at two am he drove to my house, helped me pack up my belongings and took me 'home'. I refused to stay there without paying rent, and although Steve was very against it I kept sending the money to his parents so he couldn't stop me. All he had to do was give me that 'Steve Harrington' look and I would have caved and not payed him or his parents a single penny.

I always felt like he could see right through me. Like every time those brown eyes made their way to mine that he was reading every thought that entered my mind and could tell how I was feeling. Maybe it was just because he was supposedly good with women, or maybe he just started to figure out how to be good with me? It was a thought I had often of him and I together, not always rated G and I would never admit it to Robin let alone him. Robin picked up on my crush rather quickly and would teased me about it often but it was our little secret and Steve really hated that we had a secret. He hated not being apart of it especially with two of his closet friends but I just couldn't tell him.

I wasn't really part of his crowd, even with all the fourteen year olds, and I never wanted to push my luck and force myself onto them or into their group. I knew they were all super close and that Steve cared for each of them as if they were his own children. It was cute seeing him take on this paternal instinct around them, like it was so natural and he had been doing it his whole life. Maybe it was because his parents weren't really around and he kind of had to parent himself.

His parents being MIA would definitely explain his old reputation I heard so much about from Robin. "King Steve" they would call him, and apparently he was a bit of a dick, but that changed, and he never went back to being that person. I'm glad I got to know him as the Steve he is now otherwise I'm not so sure we would get along, but together were just a couple of goofs who "Share one brain cell" between the two of us as Robin often tells us.

"Hellooooo" Steve said waving a hand in front of my face snapping me from my thoughts.

"W-what? What's up?" I said trying to act casual.

"You were day dreaming about me again weren't you" He said teasing.

"Again? Bold of you to assume I've day dreamed about you at all, let alone multiple times Harrington" I teased back. Finally standing up from floor, pulling my shorts back down my thighs from bunching I wiggled slightly and sighed. Steve eyed me suspiciously.

"Can you come help me move that big table in the back? A new shipment of snacks and shit should be here in the morning so Keith want's space for it" He said shoving his hands deep into his jeans. Which I didn't even think was possible, considering how wonderfully tight they were.

"Yes sir!" I said giving him a salute and making my way to the back. "I hate this table" I said standing at one end of it, my hands cuffed around the metal edge ready to lift. "Why?" Steve questioned going to the other end. "It's just a table" he said and laughed as he lifted his end. Nodding his head to tell me I was good to lift my end. As I lifted it pain seared through my palm and I gritted my teeth as we slowly shimmied to get the table to the other side of the room. Dropping my end of the table abruptly I grabbed my hand quickly noticing blood dripping from it. I hopped up and down muttering profanities until Steve asked me what was wrong.

"Fucking stupid table, I told you I didn't like, and it fucking cut me!" I said holding up my hand while still holding it with my other hand attempting to keep the bleeding at bay not knowing how bad the cut actually was.

"Jesus Christ (Y/N) you're bleeding everywhere!" Steve said rushing to the bathroom to retrieve the first aid kid. "No shit Sherlock" I said following him.

"Sit on the toilet" He ordered, closing the lit and gesturing to it with a nod of his head while he kneeled in front of me rummaging through the tiny red box.  I tapped my feet frantically up and down while I waited for Steve. "Okay so, we have to clean it, and that's going to hurt a lot even if it isn't as deep of a cut as it looks" he said glancing up at me. I guess he could see the concern on my face and rubbed my knee briefly. "It'll be over before you know it"

I groaned leaning back into the toilet, a few whimpers escaping my mouth as the pain continued. I watched Steve as he carefully set everything up, and even washed his hands before returning to the floor in front of me. Tipping the bottle of rubbing alcohol onto one of the pieces of gauze he steadied himself between my legs and held out his hand. I hesitated clutching my hand a little closer to my chest fearing how bad the alcohol was going to make it sting. Steves eyes softened and his mouth turned up into a small smile. "We gotta get it clean" He said softly. I slowly sat up straight and cautiously gave him my hand finally letting go of it with my other hand. He held it gently in his as he rested it on top of my thigh. "Do you want me to count to three or something?" He asked raising an eyebrow.

"No- Wait! Yes, please. Please count" I said.

"Okay" Steve said taking a deep breath. "One-"

He never made it to three before patting the wet gauze onto my hand and I yelped out but he held my hand in place. "You fucker!" I spat. Tears threatening to spill over.

"Oh you're fine" He said giving my hand a final swipe. "Look it's not even that bad! Just a little cut" Cutting a smaller piece of fresh gauze he placed it onto my palm and used medical tape to keep it in place. I watched as his fingers worked delicately around my hands, cleaning off the excess blood. I could feel my heart beat in my ears, and my skin get hot.

"You're looking a little pale there. You alright?" Steve asked. Resting his hands on my knees.

"I think I might pass out" I said weakly, feeling the tips of my fingers go numb and the room spin slightly.

"Not on my watch, come here" He said as he lifted me off the toilet and onto the floor, positioning my arms and legs so I was sat with my head between my legs. "Alright I need you to take some slow deep breaths okay? In through your nose and out through your mouth"

I did as he said and only lifted my head when the heart beat in my ears faded and the room stopped spinning. Taking a final deep breath I leaned back resting my head against the bathroom wall.

"There's that colour coming back to that pretty face" Steve said rubbing my cheek lightly with his thumb. I hummed, closing my eyes and leaning into his warm palm. Realizing what I was doing I cleared my throat and moved away from his hand. "Thank you for uh" I said raising my hand. "Fixing me" I let out an awkward laugh.

"It was my pleasure" He said smiling and standing up. For a moment I thought his cheeks might have been a slight pink but maybe I was just seeing things. I did almost just pass out so I don't know if I fully trust my own brain right now. "Take a minute to take breather, I'll clean up the blood while you do that"

I got up slowly after a few minutes of extra sitting just to make sure I wasn't going to topple over and fall unconscious and hitting my head off of something and then bleeding out in the Family Video bathroom. definitely not how I want to die. Eventually I made my way back out into the store and to the counter where Steve was counting the till whispering the numbers slightly as he flipped through the money.

Scribbling, he ran a hand through his hair before noticing me. "Hey, I grabbed a few accident report papers for you to fill out" He said pointing to them on the counter next to him.

A small laugh bubbled in my chest as I reached for them, folding them into a square and shoving them into my bag knowing I would never actually fill them out.  As if reading my thoughts like I always thought he was, he said. "I already filled one out, so don't lie and tell me you're going to fill it out and then never do it"

A blush rose to my cheeks. I don't know how he knew me so well. Maybe I was just really predictable. "Alright, double check this for me and then we are good to go" He said holding his pen out towards me. I grabbed it and stood on my tippy toes, leaning against the counter as I tapped the numbers into the calculator. "Still can't do the math in your head?" Steve whispered, not wanting to disrupt my counting. "Shut it Harrington" I mumbled giving a final check and my signature to the paper. Throwing the pen down onto the counter I raised my good hand for a high five which Steve reciprocated with a dramatic wave of his hand before slapping it against mine and giving it a light squeeze.

After locking the door behind us I followed slowly behind Steve to his car, waiting at the passenger door for him to unlock it before sliding into the seat. I tucked my knees up to my chest, resting my chin on them and wrapped my arms around them tightly. It was hard being around Steve all the time and I knew that living with him was going to be even harder, but I had only been there for a few weeks. Sitting in my room with my door always open out of habit, he would walk by fresh out of the shower, a towel hung low on his waist, his happy trail sparkling with drops of water still stuck to it. He never caught me staring in those moments thankfully, but it didn't stop me from wanting to kick down his door and kiss him.

"You okay?" Steve said breaking the silence.

"Yeah, just in my own head" Which wasn't a lie, I just couldn't tell him what exactly was going through my mind.

"What's going on in that pretty little head of yours" He asked turning down his street.

"It's nothing you need to worry about" I said forcing a smile. When he pulled up into the drive way I got out quickly, almost too quickly as I heard Steve hiss from behind me when I opened the car door before it was fully stopped.

I silently cursed at myself when I got to the front door realizing it was locked and that once again I had to wait for Steve. We still hadn't gone out to get a new copy of the house key for me, so I had to rely on him for another fucking thing.

"Please don't do that again, I could have ran over your foot or something, and I do not think I could deal with that complaining" He said walking in front of me, my shoulder slightly brushing his arm in the process, causing goosebumps to raise on my skin. He unlocked the door and opened it, gesturing with his arm for me to enter first which I did quickly. I sped up the stairs, the sound of my converse slapping against the hardwood as I went. Reaching my room I belly flopped collapsing onto my bed, breathing in the familiar scent of Steves laundry detergent on my blankets. I kicked off my shoes still laying on my stomach and heard them hit the floor with a thud. What the hell was I going to do? This crush is getting worse by the minute and I think I might actually explode. I felt like a bottle of unopened coke that had been shaken so severely that it might just burst without the seal of its plastic lid ever breaking.

I was growing annoyed with myself and obviously Steve. Because why did he have to be so fucking nice to me? No one was this nice to me, not even my parents. The people around town, knew me as that 'drunk dudes daughter' and even though I don't go to school with them, those preppy teenagers bullied me as if they had known me for years. As if I didn't have enough of my own thoughts to bully me. I pulled one of my sleeves up looking at the thin white raised scars along my wrist and forearm. Tracing them with my fingers I sighed and pulled my sleeve back down over them. It was a habit I finally recovered from, but still sometimes I found myself yearning for that familiar release.  No one in I knew Hawkins knew about it. The weather had still been cold enough when I first moved here that I could always wear sweaters and long sleeves without it being questioned. I dreaded the warm weather that had started to creep in weeks ago and I forced myself into a pair of shorts today before going to work. But it was always chilly inside the store so again the sleeves weren't questioned.

A soft knock from behind me is what broke me out of my thoughts. Rolling my head to the side and out of the corner of my eye Steve stood leaning against the doorframe of my room not daring to enter it without permission like a vampire. "Hi" I said quietly. "Come in" I rolled over and sat up crossing my legs.

Steve came in and sat in the chair at my desk. "What's going on with you?" He said looking at me.

"What do you mean?" I said pretending to be confused.

"I don't know you've been weird all day, and the getting out of the car before it was stopped?" He shrugged leaning back. "It's not like you, you usually talk to me" his eyes were soft and a worried expression slowly formed in his face.

Without telling him exact details, I took a deep breath and said. "I have a crush..." My cheeks felt hot and I avoided eye contact by picking at a loose thread in one of my socks.

"You have a crush" Steve repeated. I nodded. "It's been consuming every waking moment of my brain, and I don't know how much longer I can cope with it, I want to like" I stopped furrowing my brows thinking of the words. "-Like peel my skin off"

Steve stifled a laugh as I finally looked up at him. "Don't laugh it's not funny!"

He held his hands up in defence trying his best to suppress his laughing. "Okay I'm sorry, it's not funny. Does he have a girlfriend or something?" He questioned.

"Or she, don't be so quick to assume Harrington" I said smirking. "I mean have you seen women?"

"I have actually yeah" he laughed. "Okay so why can't you confront this 'crush'" he said using air quotes around the word crush.

"Because it's just one of those things, it would ruin everything, especially if he didn't like me back" I said the last part more quietly than intended. "I'm just waiting for it to fade, but its hard, and there's only so many cold showers I can take"

Steve choked, coughing into his fist. He shifted, seeming a little uneasy. "So why don't you... You know..." he trailed off.

"The word is masturbate Steve" I said laughing.

"Yeah I know" he said annoyed. "Its just hard to imagine you doing that"

"I don't think it's that hard" I stated leaning my back against my wooden headboard.

He stood up abruptly. "Alright I'm leaving, I'm tired" he said walking towards the door.

"Can't handle the thought Harrington?" I said teasing, getting up to rummage around for some comfy clothes.

"I really can't" He said giving me slow side smile as he walked down the hall to his bedroom and shut the door.

I stood up frozen, an old pink tank top held tightly in my hands wincing a little at my bandaged palm. What the hell was that? I glanced towards my door where he no longer stood with my mouth open in confusion. Shaking my head I walked into our shared bathroom, brushing my teeth and washing my face. I could feel the summer heat invading the house already and frowned. Lastly I cleaned my hand taking off the bandage giving it time to breathe and finally made my way into bed.

I woke up to heat. So much heat. Sitting up in my bed I felt the back of my tank top cling to me and the skin of my thighs that had been touching were slick with sweat. Why was it so fucking hot? Stumbling out of bed even my bare feat stuck to the floor as I made my way down stairs. Steve stood in the middle of the kitchen, tools splayed out all over the counters, a bead of sweat dripping down the side of his face and onto his shoulder, his naked chest slightly shiny as the sweat clung to his chair. A pair of old basketball shorts hanging just a little lower on his hips than they should be. He wiped his forehead with the back of his hand before noticing me standing in front of him.

"AC is broken" He said frowning.

"Fuck me" I said running my hands through my hair. Only now realizing I was stood in front of him in a very short and tight tank top and a pair of pink pajama shorts. His eyes glanced down and back up quickly before clearing his throat and continuing his search for whatever specific tool he was looking for. "What are you even doing? Do you know how to fix it?" I questioned.

"No I don't have a fucking clue how to fix it (Y/N)" He said clearly annoyed, while planting his palms flat onto the counter with a light smack to look up at me.

"Sorry" I said shrinking into my shoulders a little. I didn't mean to upset him.

"No, no" He wiped his forehead again. "I'm sorry, I'm just hot and frustrated, I didn't mean to snap"

"It's okay" I said giving him a sly smile. "it was kind of hot?" I admitted.

"Hot? What being rude?"

"Yeah a little" I said biting my lip to stifle a laugh. "I mean I'm sure you've been mean, like sexually to girls in bed right?"

He scratched the back of his head. "Well I mean yeah" His cheeks turning a little more pink than they already were.

"So then there you go" I said clapping my hands together. I walked towards to fridge opening the freezer grabbing a red popsicle from the box at the back.

"Breakfast?" He smirked. I saluted him with the popsicle in hand. "I'm getting in the pool" I stated, walking past him and out the back door sitting down on the ledge of the pool sticking my feet in. Ripping the plastic off of the popsicle I popped the end of it into my mouth swirling it around. The water was cold and I shivered as it touched my skin but it felt so good. I moaned a little, leaning back onto my hand letting my head fall back. The sun wasn't high enough in the sky yet to burn me just yet, and I watched as it sprinkled through the leaves of the trees. A slight breeze came and went every so often and it really helped along with my nearly melted popscile. It was better than the stale hot air from inside the house. Sliding the last bit of it off of the wooden stick I gave my hands a quick rinse with the pool water.

I heard some loud banging and then the back door open aggressively and Steve stomped out, clearly still frustrated. Sitting down next to me he sighed, the cold water very obviously instantly calming him.

"I called my parents, they said someone will come to fix the AC tomorrow" He said quietly.

"Okay" I said softly while swinging my feet back and fourth in the water, listening to the rippling noises. I leaned back so my back was now flat against the concrete and rolled my tank top until it sat right under my boobs. If I was going to be out here I might as well try to work on my tan. I traced patterns lazily along my stomach and felt myself relaxing into my own touch.  

The phone ran from inside of the house and I squinted, only opening one eye to look over at Steve who sighed before getting up to go answer it. Leaning back up onto my elbows I decided to finally just get into the water. Getting up and walking to the shallow end and walked down the few steps until I was waist deep, my hands swaying around me in the water. I would have put on a swim suit but I had no intention of going back into that hell hot house unless absolutely necessary. Taking a deep breath I dipped my head under the water standing back up gasping lightly at the cold temperature against my chest. It was almost euphoric how good the water felt.

Steve emerged again from the house and resumed his position at the edge of the pool. "The children want to come and use the pool, and because I can't say no to those little shit heads, they'll be here in fifteen"

I laughed lightly while continuing to swirl the water around me with my hands. "You and those tiny children"

"You can't call them tiny, most of them are taller than you" Steve said kicking water towards me. "You're literally in the shallow end of a pool and it's almost at your boobs"

I rolled my eyes and attempted to splash him back but the water didn't reach him as much as I wanted to. "Will you ever let me live it down that I'm short?"

"Never" he said smiling. I watched his eyes glance down clearly at my chest and then back up, craning his neck pretending to look at the sky.

Blushing I looked down, realizing the tank top I was wearing was almost see through. Panicking I covered my chest crossing my arms and hooking my hands into my armpits for maximum protection. Before I could speak, I heard the loud voices of the young gang approaching the backyard. "Shit" I mumbled and sunk down into the water so it would cover my exposed chest.

"Steve I need you to get me a different shirt" I said quietly.

"Oh why?" He said jokingly. "Don't want a bunch of teenagers seeing your nipples?" He glanced down again quickly.

"Stop flirting and go get me a different shirt please" I begged through gritted teeth.

The kids stumbled into the backyard yelling, laughing, and pushing each other. "(Y/N)!" Max yelled running over to the edge of the pool closet to me. "I was really hoping I wasn't going to be the only girl out here, because if I spend one more minute with them, my brain might actually start losing IQ points"

I let out a small laugh, still keeping my shoulders below the water. The boys instantly jumped into the pool, and began beating each other with pool noodles they brought along with them. Max sat at the edge of the pool, sunglasses on and a book in her hands with a small towel hung over her freckled shoulders, probably preventing herself from getting sun burnt.

Eventually Steve finally returned, one of his t-shirts in hand, and a bunch of towels tucked under his arm. I swam back over to the edge of the pool and held my hand out so he could pass it to me, and he almost did, but instead hesitated and stepped back with a smirk on his face. He walked back a bit and placed it on one of the lounge chairs. "Shirts here if you still need it" He said pointing down to it.

"Steve can you bring it to me please?"

"Nah I think you can come and get it"

I groaned. "Steve can you please just bring it to me, I don't have time for your stupid mind games right now"

That caused a few chuckles out of the boys and I smiled.

"What's the problem?" Max asked. "Why won't he give you the shirt?"

"Because he's annoying" I said matter of factly.

"Why don't you just go and get it?" Dustin asked.

"Because she doesn't want everyone to see her boobs" Steve said laughing slightly.

The boys all groaned and I even heard one of them mutter "Gross" turning their attention back to each other, and although I wanted to laugh at them for being so immature I held my glare at Steve.

What game is he trying to play right now? I stared at him mouth agape not knowing what to do, or what was going on in that big head of his. And then he slowly licked his lips, his tongue darting out briefly and then I knew. He was coming onto me. But why? And why now? Was this is normal friendly flirting that he does with me and Robin all the time, or was this actual flirting, because if he is actually flirting right now, the heat that is barreling down onto my back from the sun is not helping the rising temperature growing throughout my body.

So mustering all the courage I had, I walked slowly over to the steps dunking my head under the water again one last time before beginning to walk up and out of the pool while smoothing my hair back out of my face. I walked towards Steve, and squeezed the water out of the side of my tank top knowing he was watching my every move. I stood in front of him, looking up at him through my wet lashes and reached for the bottom of my top before lifting it over my head leaving me completely bare chested in front of him. His breath hitched and I watched him swallow hard, his Adams apple bobbing as he did so. Reaching down for the shirt, still not breaking eye contact I pulled it over my head.  

"Don't forget to blink there big boy" I said patting his chest and walking past him back into the house.

Once I was about halfway up the stairs I let out a breath I was apparently holding. "Holy shit" I whispered. I shook my head and headed to the bathroom to wash the chlorine off of my skin, and to maybe cool down a little extra, away from everyone. Stripping myself of my wet clothes I turned the shower on, making the water just barely warm enough to not overheat me while in there.

I stood there for a moment, just letting the water fall over me trying to compose my thoughts but the sound of the bathroom door opening distracted me. Leaning around the shower curtain I saw Steve who was shutting the door behind him and locking it before turning to face me. "Uh I'm in the shower?" I stated but it came out more like a question. "Yeah I can see that" He laughed and began to start taking off his shorts.

I quickly avoided any sort of eye contact with him and leaned back into the shower, my hands covering my face. "Steve what the hell, what are you doing?" Eyes still covered I heard the shower curtain move again and felt Steve brush against me.

"I'm showering" He said as if he's done this a million times before, and maybe he had, but not with me.

I stood there, awkwardly silent, unsure of what to say, or what to do next. Steves hands came up, and he placed them gently over mine encouraging me to take them off of my face and I let him but still kept my eyes closed. His thumb rubbed gently over one of my scars and I flinched slightly at the thought of him knowing. He brought my wrist up to his lips and placed a gentle kiss to it. "I'm not going to bite (Y/L/N)" he said softly still holding my hands.

Slowly I opened one eye, peaking out of it slightly to look up at him. "I mean I only bite if you're into that" A small smirk forming at the sides of his mouth.

Instinctively I rolled my eyes and laughed finally looking up at him. He kept his eyes on my face, never once looking down at my naked frame, as if he didn't just see my boobs ten minutes prior to disrupting my shower. "Shouldn't you be watching the kids?"

"They basically left as soon as you did, talking about that board game they play with Eddie Munson"

I nodded slowly and bit my bottom lip.

"That was a bold move back there" he said moving a piece of wet hair that clung to my face, his hand lingering ever so slightly on my cheek.

"I agree" I said turning my head. I didn't know where to look, and looking at him this close to me, would only make things worse, so instead I settled on a tiny crack in the tile just to the left behind him. "Um Steve?" I said quietly, hesitantly glancing at him.

"Yeah?"

"Why are you in the shower with me?" I watched him this time as he was the one to avoid my gaze. His cheeks turning pink, he scratched the back of his head.

"I honestly wasn't thinking straight, I just- I just started walking, and then I couldn't stop seeing you standing in front of me topless in the back of my mind, and so here I am..." He said trailing off. "I think because you finally noticed"

"Noticed what?"

"That I was hitting on you"

"Well yeah it was kind of hard to miss, you've never done that before"

He chuckled, his head leaning back slightly. "I've been hitting on you since the day I met you (Y/N)"

My mouth opened slightly in shock and I stared at him for a moment. "Wait a minute" I said taking a small step back to get a better look at him. "You waited until you were inches away from me, NAKED" I said emphasizing the word naked. "To tell me you've been hitting on me"

"I'll admit it wasn't the best decision I've made, but I had to act quick, I didn't want to go a second more without you knowing, especially with this crush you keep talking about" He sounded almost jealous and now it was my turn to laugh.

"S-Steve" I said in-between laughs. "It's you. You're the one I have a crush on"

We both stared at each other for a moment before bursting into a fit of laughter. I clutched my sides in pain from laughing and Steve held onto one of my shoulders.

"How long has Robin been coaching you?" I asked, still giggling.

"Oh everyday, every fucking day"

"She's been helping me!" I said laughing a little harder again. "Well we can never say she's a bad friend because she didn't tell either of us that we were crushing on each other this whole time"

"I think she might actually be the best after this" He said looking back at me. Finally looking into his eyes I still felt like he could see right through me.

"Can I kiss you?" he asked quietly.

I nodded my head a little too eagerly but he smiled, holding both sides of my face in his hands and kissed me gently on the lips. They were slow, sweet kisses, like we wanted to savour every moment, every feeling, every taste. He lowered his hands to my waist pulling me closer to him, and I wrapped my arms around his neck sinking into the kiss. Breaking the kiss slowly he smiled, "You taste like cherry"

He began to place light kisses along my jaw and down my neck. I tilted my head back slightly to give him more room. Kissing both of my collar bones he stopped looking at me. "You can touch me Steve" I said blushing. He continued kissing my chest, going lower and lower until his tongue quickly grazed my nipple. One hand holding the other boob squeezing lightly, his thumb brushing over my nipple, while he kissed, licked, and sucked onto the other one before returning his mouth to mine.

I felt his hard erection brush against my leg, and I looked down reaching for it and wrapped my hand around it. He groaned into my mouth as I began to jerk him slowly. "We don't have to keep going" He said breathlessly. "I don't want to rush you- Fuuuck you're good at this" his head tilted back and the water ran down his muscular chest. Please with myself I smiled and pepper kisses all over his torso. "I don't want to stop" I said mumbling between kisses against his chest. "I've been thinking about this for far too long to stop now Harrington" I said shifting so I was now knelt in front of him. He didn't notice until I wrapped my mouth around him. A hearty gasp leaving his lips as his head fell forward, his hands instantly going into my hair. I bobbed my head back and fourth swirling my tongue around the tip every so often causing the grip he had in my hair to tighten. "You thought about this?"

"Mhmm" I said still wrapped around him.

"Get up" He ordered tapping me on the shoulder. I pulled back from him, drool rolling down my chin. He pulled me back up kissing me until my back hit the wall of the other side of the shower. "Leg up" He said grabbing my thigh, instructing me to put my foot on the edge of the tub. He turned around, reaching up and pulled down the detachable shower head, changing the setting to something a little stronger. A setting I had used many times before. He stood close to me, as close as he could without ripping the shower head off of the wall, and slowly raised the water up and against my leg until the water rippled against my clit. I jerked back, my ass hitting off the wall and I leaned forward holding onto his bicep. "Holy fuck St-Steve" I said leaning my head against his chest. "If I cum like this, it'll be too much to have sex" I said quickly, finally feeling my orgasm slowly grow.

"No sex, I just want to make you cum" he said shifting beginning to shake the shower head side to side so the water rolled back and forth lightly against my clit.

"No, I want you to fuuuuu-uck. Fuck! Please fuck me Steve" I whimpered my legs beginning to shake. Putting the shower head back in it's place he turned back to me "Don't have to tell me twice"

I clenched my thighs together tightly catching my breath in the brief moment of relief until he slid his hand in between my legs rubbing my clit a few times more. I whined, my mouth falling slack when he added a finger into me curling it upwards. "Please" I begged. "Please, I need you to fuck me, please" He continued to curl his finger into me harshly before abruptly removing it, sticking the finger into his mouth, cleaning myself off of him with his tongue. I reached a hand towards him and whispered "Please" one more time while batting my eyelashes. "I could get used to you begging" He hummed, while bringing me into him, turning me around and trailing kisses down the back of my neck and to my shoulder.

"Steveeee" I breathed and pushed my ass into his dick. He smacked it lightly and I squealed, laughing a little.

"You poor sweet thing" he said opening my legs and positioning himself behind me. I bent over as best as I could and held onto the wall. Swiping the tip of his dick against me, my eyes rolled back and I moaned loudly. "So desperate" his chuckled halted as he slowly inched his tip into me. A small cry left my mouth.

"You okay?" He breathed.

"Never been better" I huffed. "Keep going" I instructed. "I'm okay, it feels good" I reassured him, reaching behind me to pat his hand that held onto my hip.

He nodded furrowing his brows as he slipped the rest of him into me. My knees locking together, pleasure filling my stomach.

"Fucking hell (Y/N)"

My name sounded like honey coming out of his mouth like that. Slowly he began thrusting into me, picking up speed only after reaching down between my legs rubbing light circles. "You feel so good pretty girl" He cooed into my neck, just below my ear. I continued to whine and moan, writhing against him, pushing my ass back into each thrust. He smacked my ass again, my orgasm building more. "Keep fucking yourself on me like that"

And I did. I rocked back and forth attempting to keep my balance as sturdy as I could with the floor being slick with water and the edge of my orgasm trying to burst. I slowed down, unable to keep fucking myself on him with the fast heavy circles he made on my clit. My stomach began to tighten and my breath quickened. "I'm going to cum, don't stop, please don't stop, oh my god, just like that, yes, fuck" I leaned up slightly and he pulled me into him, my arched back against his chest as he continued rubbing. "Cum for me, cum on my cock"

My legs began to tremble and head rolled back as I loudly rode out my orgasm with the most ungodly moans and whimpers. He started to fuck me again holding almost all of my weight. "Cum in my mouth" I slurred, still in the euphoria of my orgasm. Pulling away from him I got back onto my knees in front of him opening my mouth and sticking my tongue out. "Fuck you're so goddamn pretty" He said leaning down to kiss me briefly, jerking himself. The tip of his cock rested on the flat of my tongue as his cum shot out into my mouth. A loud groan leaving his lips in the process. Giving the tip a gently lick up the back I brought his cum to the back of my mouth and swallowed and smiled back up at him.

"Come here beautiful" he said reaching his hands out to me so he could help me stand. I wobbled slightly. Wiping whatever cum was left off of my face with his thumb he kissed me. Slow and gently, just like the first one. "Lets get washed up, and then go watch a movie or something yeah?"

I smiled lazily blinking slowly. "God you're already so fucked out of your mind for me" he laughed.

"What can I say, you did a good job"

He kissed me on the nose before reaching over to grab a loofa and lather it with soap.

We gave ourselves a proper shower, stealing kisses from one another often. When we got out, Steve instructed I stayed in my room until he told me I could come out. I got dressed in a baggy shirt, and some boy short underwear keeping minimal clothing on as the house was still very hot. I heard lots of groaning and shuffling outside of my door. "Are you okay?" I yelled.

"I'm fine!" He huffed.

Another ten minutes later, I was almost falling asleep at my desk when Steve knocked and opened the door. "You can come downstairs now" A large smile spread across his face.

Following him down the stair and into the living room, he stopped motioning his hands towards the floor while saying "Ta-da!"

he had set it all up for a movie night. His mattress laying in the middle, with every pillow in the house, and a couple of thin blankets. Two fans blew cool air towards the bed, and my small stuffed fox and childhood blanket were tucked into one side of the 'bed'.  Different snacks were placed onto the coffee table and a few different movies were stacked on top of each other on the floor in front of the TV.  Smiling I hopped down onto the bed, cuddling my fox and blanket to my chest, sighing softly into the pillows. Steve came and joined me under the blankets pulling me into him. "I couldn't leave your little buddies all alone in your bed" He said poking the small fox on the head and I stifled a giggle. He kissed the top of my forehead and attempted to pull me closer to him.

It didn't take long for both of us to fall asleep. The sounds of the oscillating fans humming lulled us to sleep quickly before we could even discuss which movie we wanted to watch.

[shakespearean-snape]

Seriously, I was born in 1990 and started going online in those often talked about "wild west" days when a simple search could take you to some unexpectedly explicit sites and the only thing between you and that content was your decision to be honest about your age or not. It's how I came across the Sailor Moon/Dragon Ball Z porn crossover and how I gained access to sites like adultfanfiction.net when I was underage and that was entirely down to the fact I was choosing to ignore the age warnings and exposing myself to 18+ content. The sites did the required thing, I chose to ignore it and sometimes I encountered things I wasn't wholly prepared for but I always understood that was on me and because I was on a site I was too young for.

I repeat, I knew I was doing something I wasn't supposed to because from the time I was 13+ I wasn't a helpless little moron who didn't possess the basic intelligence needed comprehend what consenting to access 18+ sites when I was underage meant and I had no one to blame but myself. These days, Internet literacy is greater than it was when I was a minor online (most of the underage kids had parents who grew up on the Internet and know what it's like, in contrast to many 90s and early 00s kids) and the warnings are better in terms of knowing in advance what you may be getting into (unlike the Geocities days of old where you go looking for fandom content and find loads of MA fic and porn-y edits on someone's fansite they didn't think to warn for or those old Yahoo chatrooms where literally anyone could be on there doing anything). Trying to shift the blame to anyone else when you go seeking out content you know you're too young to be exposing yourself to is just a cop-out to avoid taking accountability for doing something you know you shouldn't and facing the consequences for it by being shocked, squicked or triggered by what you find after ignoring the warnings. It's Pandora's box people, if you open it and don't like what happens that's on you because you were warned and had every opportunity to show some self-awareness and ask yourself, "Should I really be doing this? Am I really prepared for it? Maybe I should heed the 18+ warning and not open the box."

This entitled idea that the Internet should be sanitized is, quite frankly, stupid. Yes, I am calling people who believe that is how the Internet should function stupid because they are. They're stupid because it is the simple-minded approached to a far more complex issue they're either too lazy or unwilling to critically address. The Internet is not meant to be the baby-sitter of underage children. It is a tool, a melting pot of users of all ages and all different regions of the world and as a result you are going to encounter a lot of varied content and ideas and if you're not taking the proper precautions to curate what kind of content your children may encounter that is entirely your fault for not making the effort. If you're not sitting down and having conversations with your children about online safety and how they can also be responsible for curating the content they should be looking at that is entirely your fault. If you're underage and ignoring the best efforts of sites and creators to apply age restrictions and warnings and you encounter something that shocks or triggers or upsets you because you ignored those warnings that is entirely your fault.

The only time it is not the fault of the user is when some adult online goes out of their way to be predatory and expose someone underage to content they are too young for, because that does happen (it happened to me back in the day) and that is exactly why parents need to talk with their children about the red-flags to watch out for just as they do for stranger-danger offline. The reality is that up to taking the legal precautions now required of 18+ sites to keep minors from accidentally stumbling onto explicit content, strangers on the Internet are not responsible for what other people's children are doing and it's stupid to expect them to be. That doesn't mean it can't hurt for adults to educate themselves on redflags to watch for in their fandom and also just the best protocol for if they encounter advertisements to sites that are obviously trafficking children (pro tip if you encounter blogs here on Tumblr linking to offsite "porn" sites that are clearly trafficking underage children don't just report it to Tumblr because all they do is remove the blog, report it to the Feds and they'll properly investigate) but what it really comes down to is that underage people on the Internet and their parents need to be responsible.

It's the same logic as having a baby and expecting every location you go to outside of your home will go to the extremes of baby-proofing everything for you before you arrive. That isn't how it works, you have to watch your kid out in the world and as they grow up the kids have to learn how to make judgment calls for themselves a.k.a. stove is hot, do not touch. This "think of the children" hand wringing is just an extension of the conservative outcries/redherings currently being used to justify the discrimination of lgbtqia+ people and poc creators and in every instance where it works and people buy into it lgbtqia+ and poc creators are the most affected (and the actual predators out in the world are even more insulated and protected because of all the hand-waving misdirection of the far-right taking our attention away from the real danger to children and desensitizing us to child predation with an overabundance of false claim narratives even as they defend the legality of child marriage in states where it's legal in the US). It's time to use your brains and start thinking critically about the content you're seeking out and exposing yourself to on a case by case basis because that is the only real answer, and you'll notice it isn't a conveniently easy one because this puritanical conservative don't think too hard just let us sanitize everything for you approach is far more dangerous and harmful and strips people of all their agency in the name of "safety." That's what happens when you give up accountability for yourself and/or those you're responsible for (i.e. your kids) and embrace sweeping censorship because it seems like the easy answer to a far more complex issue you don't want to be bothered with tackling.

"There are children on the internet!"

Yes, and they can access most porn sites if their parents aren't paying attention to them by lying about their age and clicking a little checkbox.

If mommy and daddy didn't teach little Timmy not to copy-cat what he sees or reads in fiction, that's mommy's and daddy's fault.

If mommy and daddy didn't set up some child safety on the internet machine that connects indiscriminately to a wide variety of material posted onto the internet by a variety of people around the world that they let little Timmy play on, that's mommy's and daddy's fault.

If little Timmy isn't illiterate and sees tags and content warnings about something that he knows is going to squick or even trigger him, but he reads or views it anyway, that's little Timmy's fault.

If little Timmy is too immature to curate his internet experience--if mommy and daddy don't teach him how to do so, that's mommy's and daddy's fault. If little Timmy is old enough to be able to do so and he's still too immature to take such actions, that's little Timmy's fault, and perhaps his parents should be more involved with their child and less neglectful and negligent.

Maybe children shouldn't be exposed to the internet all willy-nilly. The internet as a whole is not child friendly and should not be, because way more than just children use it. There are child-safe websites and games that little Timmy can play on.

It's the parents responsibility to keep their child from wandering off and getting lost in meatspace.

It's the parents responsibility to keep their child from clicking onto some smutty fanfiction or xvideos.

Children on the internet are the responsibility of that child's parents.

Shocking, I know!

[mjalti]

Ana, I'm 15 and I don't want to go into it too deeply but long story short I am 100% sure I have an STD, a permanent one, I just found out about a week ago that this guy I had sex with is sick. He's also a legal adult and I'm not. It was consensual though he didn't force me into it. I wanted to etc. But I didn't know he was sick and neither one of us used a condom. If I go to the doctor do you think they'll call my parent??? Like is it a legal thing they have to do because I'm a minor or will I be able to keep it quiet until I'm ready to tell someone??

if he didn't tell you he was infected, that was assault. I think you should go to planned parenthood and get tested. I think it seems like you haven't done that? Only that you know now he was sick. If you don't know your status, please check in with planned parenthood or a local center for an STI test. They work extremely well with confidentiality and you need to know about your body instead of stressing about it.

ALWAYS use a condom bc they protect from StI'/STDs.

I think you should really consider your options and ultimately decide what you want to do. This man did assault you bc you would not have consented to sex without a condom if you knew he was positive of STI's. I know you're 15 but if you choose to be sexually active, you also need to be sexually responsible and literate in your consent. You have to ask your partners if they've been tested recently, and for your OWN health, test between partners.

I'm really proud of you for reaching out for help, even if it's with me, but you need to take it a step further and go get officially tested so that you can see what medicine is available to you if you do test positive.

[kendochick-moor]

February 2010 - Naruto - Genma/Sakura - “The Manager”

Fandom: Naruto

Pairing: KakaSaku? ItaSaku? Team 7?.... Genma/Sakura...? Meh, who knows…

Word-count: ?? between 1000 – 1200 words?

Genre: Romance/Comedy

Canon / AU: AU, modern rock-star

Summary: Genma, you sl--! Legendary manager Sakura Haruno has had enough with her talent constantly seeking scandal and notoriety; said talent, in order to help his beloved manager ‘relax’, arranges for her to find a suitable release for her stress.

 -----------------------------------------------

The pink-haired woman grit her teeth and forced herself to suppress the fury that threatened to explode from her burning chest.

“Genma,” she growled in warning, “I swear, if you so much as look at a woman the wrong way when we get out of this limo, I am dropping you.”

“Oh come on,” smirked the band’s lead singer with a cocky raise of his eyebrow and suggestive leer around his toothpick, “It’s all part of the persona, Sakura. You know they want it. Even the media--.”

“—the media are looking for it specifically from you so they can back up the latest scandal, you idiot! How could you have forgotten to check her ID? What is the Number One thing I’ve always told you when you take your fans back to the hotel? What is it? Huh?!”

Still chipper, the well-dressed celeb feigned a serious tone and replied, “Make sure she’s legal—and that I’m ‘covered’.”

Ignoring his sarcasm, his manager uncrossed her arms to sink her nails into the leather she sat on, nearly leaping at him and shouted from her seat, “YA DAMN SKIPPY, YOU MAKE SURE SHE’S LEGAL, that’s what! Do you have any idea what I went through last time cleaning up after you?”

“She invited me to her place, you know--.”

“She invited you to her parents’ basement! What were you thinking!?”

The return of his trademark leer nearly sent the poor woman over the edge.

“If I hadn’t traced you through your GPS phone, don’t you realize what could have happened?”

Panting in anger, she tried to regain some semblance of composure as the limo rounded the last corner and started to slow before the TV station. They still had a few minutes, as they’d be entering from the rear, but any sign of distress would be like lighting a flare-bomb before the usual news media who followed them constantly wherever they roamed.

Closing her eyes a moment, the woman stilled, completely. With a few deep breaths, she tried to relax her death-grip on her seat, and calmed herself. “You know I live for you, right? But I can’t keep doing this, Genma…”

Her shoulders slumped slightly, and they felt the car pull to the curb and stop.

Now, the slightly older man across from the industry’s greatest manager paused in his teasing – he loved needling her, getting a rise out of her, and in general enjoyed his time with Sakura, as she was a legend in the normally flash-in-the-pan entertainment world – but recently, he had to admit she’d been looking more stressed than usual, and his antics did seem to be taking a more considerable toll on her than they used to. Perhaps he could lighten up on her a little bit…

Raising a pale, manicured hand to her forehead (which she was only faintly sensitive about these days, thanks to mastering a few hair and make-up tricks), Sakura Haruno leaned back against her seat and let out a long, tired breath. Her beautiful jade-green eyes opened and stared at the ceiling, her thoughts hidden from him until she spoke.

“I mean it, Genma,” she said softly when he didn’t offer any response. “If this is how you’re going to be, I’m walking away. Between consenting adults is one thing, but I am never going to cover your ass when it comes to a minor. Ever. One strike, you’re out.”

Silence filled the limo; she was serious.

An angry Sakura, he could handle; a happy Sakura, rare as it was, was a gem; however, as the handsome man paused in thought a moment to really look her petite form over, a quiet Sakura, especially a particularly worn, silent Sakura as he saw now, was worrisome. The woman he’d worked with over the past few years had given everything she had to put – and keep – him on top of his industry. To his knowledge, he realized now, he’d never seen her socialize much with her personal friends, or make excuses to cut out early from appointments or interviews to visit friends or family. She’d lived for her work, and that meant… him.

Though he’d never admit it to anyone else, he’d noticed she’d lost weight recently. That she was getting more easily tired out by their schedule, and that she would sleep only in fitful naps, never truly resting. He’d even caught her taking energy supplements and once, possibly even some kind of narcotic to help her get through the day awake, then something else to help her ‘sleep’.

But he was still on top of his game…

Well, damn it all to hell, now the irrepressibly selfish man felt a hint of something in his gut. What was that?

Confusion?... Bad breakfast?.... Was it gas? Discomfort….

Aha!

…Guilt.

His eyelids lowered slightly in distaste. Hmm.

‘Guilt’ didn’t fit with the persona. Or sit well with his genuine self, either.

Not that he had any intention of really curbing his own behaviour, but perhaps he could find a hobby for his poor, beleaguered manager, to help her relax.

Because as much as he teased her, he thought the world of her. She was practically his sister, or mom, or favourite… sister-aunt? He liked her. And she was damn good at her job. So if he wanted to keep his, then she had to take up some kind of de-stressing activity.

… something that didn’t involve the industry, per se… but that would still afford her the flexibility she needed to do her job….

Something like… knitting?...

His eyes narrowed slightly; no, that probably wasn’t a good idea. He’d seen his manager take out a paparazzi stalker once with a retractable snow-shovel, in a pinch; long, sharp, pointy needles were just asking for trouble.

Perhaps… macramé?

Pursing his famous lips, his mentally shook his head ‘no’. It’d be too easy for her to knot a noose around his neck after another innocent (in his opinion) escapade.

Well, she obviously couldn’t garden or scrapbook while they were travelling, and volunteering was out of the question, but she needed something that would help calm her down, give her some kind of release….

Suddenly, Genma grinned.

Why hadn’t he thought of it before?

It was perfect!

As their chauffeur politely knocked on the window, then opened the door for them, Genma laid a compassionate hand on his manager’s and looked her in the eye when she faced him.

“Let’s go, the fans are waiting,” he smiled.

With a nod, Sakura took his hand and followed him out.

Yes, thought the internally smirking man as he entered the huge television station and waved to the screaming throngs, things were going to be A-OK as soon as he got his manager royally laid.

Now, who should the lucky man be?...

  *************

[buffysummers]

What about Bangel TW for survivors of satutory rape? Buffy was 17 when they had sex and even younger when he fell in love with her. A minor.

I’m not really sure what me tagging Spuffy tw has to do with Bangel… but that being said, no one has asked me to tag a tw for Bangel. But if they did, I would only have to tag it when reblogging the scene where they have sex, and you literally can’t see anything at all. And since you don’t even follow me and therefore aren’t subjected to tags I do and do not use, I don’t really see why you even bothered sending me this message, if only to protect Spuffy. 

There is a stark difference between the sex scenes between Spuffy (where it’s often violent and Spike is verbally abusing Buffy so she will sleep with him) and the tasteful and brief scene between Buffy and Angel. Additionally, BtVS has a lot of fans all over the world, and there are many places where 16/17 is considered an adult so it wouldn’t even be considered statutory rape. 

A lot of people I have met online told me that the age of consent is 16 where they live and they had no idea there was this sudden selective outrage in terms of the age gap between Buffy and Angel.

If you have an issue with age gaps to where it’s triggering for you to see, I recommend not watching, reading or consuming any type of vampire fiction. You will see it in every vampire story you watch or read.

Statutory rape (which is a legal term and not what would warrant a tw, the abuse that can come w a large age gap is) is harmful because one may not have the emotional maturity to make decisions regarding sex. They may be more susceptible to grooming and manipulation by a partner that is older than them, and their partner will use their experience to take advantage of them. However, the fate of the world is in Buffy’s hands and she is given an insane amount of responsibility. She is chosen and she is very singular in the world. To compare her emotional strength and maturity to the average 17 year-old who is having sex within a location that requires you to be 18 is a pointless comparison. I am supposed to believe Buffy is too naive to make a decision to have sex with her boyfriend whom she is in a committed and loving relationship with, but she’s mature enough to make decisions regarding the entire world? Again, this is a fantasy show. What makes vampires so compelling is that they do have rich and layered histories, one they couldn’t have if they weren’t immortal.

And lastly, relationships involving minors are dangerous because the younger person (so in this case, Buffy) is at a disadvantage due to their gaps in life experience. This leads to strained power dynamics within the relationship where the younger person tends to be subservient and they lose agency over themselves as well as the relationship. Because Buffy is the slayer, this completely changes the dynamic between Buffy and Angel. SHE is the one with the power, not Angel, so the reasons why age gaps are dangerous and harmful are no longer applicable to the relationship they share. 

I’ll say it one more time, this is a FANTASY show involving vampires. Generally, one knows what they’re subjecting themselves to when engaging with vampire media.

Also, in California, if two people both under the age of consent, have sex with each other, both parties are committing a crime. If this happens in California, both minor parties engaged in sexual intercourse would be found criminally liable.

It’s such a crazy law that it’s illegal for Buffy to have sex at all before she turns 18. Now, how many shows break this law? How many movies? Books? Too many to count. Why are we selectively choosing to condemn Bangel? Regardless, the age gap between Buffy and Angel should never be used as a justification for shipping or supporting a separate abusive relationship. They are not connected.

[workingforitallthetime]

ok, i am perseverating on this topic because it really did worry me. so i did a full usntdp audit of my blog. i’m jotting down my reflections only for my own future reference, although they may also be useful for anyone who’s trying to decide whether to unfollow and/or request that i filter something for you (which i’m always happy to do).

so, i went back through my entire blog starting with the date trevor zegras zoomed across the foreground of the team usa photo and straight into my heart. i was greatly relieved to find that i have not made any explicit references to individual minors. everything of possible relevance to the topic was either a general reference to the usntdp, or a specific present-day reference to an individual member of the usntdp class of 2019, all of whom are currently 20 years old. because hopefully reviewing everything i’ve said in the past is going to help me be more mindful going forward, i’m gonna break it down:

references to the usntdp

--as i suspected, joke tags were indeed the problem. my general ustndp tag was a bad idea and has been retired. i regret it, and i regret another similar one i used a couple of times. now i no longer have a general usntdp tag, but i decided i’d rather leave all my references to the collective usntdp class of 2019 unsearchable instead of making them accessible in the general usntdp tag or coming up with another supposedly fun tag that might turn out to be a bad idea.

--along similar lines, i found one reblog of the joke “usa hockey is fuck or die.” the source material that led to this joke is a locker room video from the 2021 IIHF World Junior Championship (a U20 event). i checked DOBs and everyone involved is over 18. still not going to reference that joke again on the blog, or anything similar.

--i have made multiple references to the concept of usntdp spin the bottle. i have thought about this, and my conclusion is that it falls on the non-explicit side of my bright line, and i will continue to reference this cherished headcanon. teen kissing: approved!

references to individual members of the usntdp class of 2019

i did not find anything in this category that i felt violated my bright line about not writing anything explicit about minors. i did find occasional suggestive content related to 19- and 20-year-olds. gonna jot down my thinking about each of those instances:

--i have said a couple of highly complimentary things about about cam york’s thighs. the pictures that prompted those references all appear to postdate his usntdp era and therefore contain legal adult thighs. i am going to continue to allow myself the occasional thirsty thigh comment when circumstances warrant, although reminding myself that is really not the purpose of my blog.

--i have made some explicit references to trevor zegras in fic scenarios, all self-evidently pertaining to the post-usntdp era.

--i have obliquely referenced my cherished and elaborate humiliation kink headcanons about alex turcotte and his AHL teammates (i.e. in circumstances in which everybody’s 18+), and i will continue to do so. obliquely.

--as noted in those pearl-clutching tags the other day, i have referenced writing porn about cole caufield, who is currently 20 years old. i don’t think it’s reasonable for someone to see an undated reference about porn and assume that a minor is involved. everyone was a minor once. if someone personally still thinks of a current 20-year-old as the minor he was more than two years ago,  that seems like it could be related to fandom’s pernicious desire to infantilize rich famous white men, and that’s not a me problem. i have decided that i will not be adding an explicit “...and this all takes place after their 18th birthdays!” qualifier whenever i reference writing porn about current legal adults.

--relatedly, the current forecast is that i’m gonna have some thoughts about cole caufield’s 20-year-old body, and i may air those on this blog at a level of explicitness similar to my thoughts about jordan martinook’s body. i can’t help it, it’s... like... transitive horniness as a symptom of writing fic? idk. i am not gonna stop writing sex scenes about consenting adults (even if those adults are 5′7 and have the face of a cavalier king charles spaniel puppy),* and i am not gonna stop enthusing about that writing process in tags.

one overall takeaway for me is that some people may have a different comfort zone than i do about explicit material pertaining to people who fandom has known as minors in the not too distant past. maybe this isn’t an issue for me personally because that set-up was inherent to 1D fandom? i’m comfortable with my bright line of “no explicit writing about minors but anything 18+ is fair game,” and if anybody has a different personal comfort zone, i’m satisfied that the appropriate solution is for them to unfollow and not for me to stop lovingly crafting this quarantine facetime wank scene. however, in order to be responsible about lovingly crafting porn involving consenting adults, i have to make sure i’m not sloppy about general usntdp references that could be read to encompass minors, whether or not that’s an interpretation i intended.

*hmmmm this does make me notice that nobody said boo when this blog included explicit material regarding 20-year-old andrei svechnikov. it’s interesting to consider whether people look at svech differently than the 20-year-old alumni of the usntdp because svech is 6′2 and built like an ox, or whether national origin could be a factor here.

[onisiondrama]

Onision on Kermit and Friends - Summary Part 2

((Edit: Sorry! I feel like I should have put a warning! A homophobic guest briefly shows up on the stream. If you want to skip that part, skip the first bullet.))

New fan comes on. James points out the fan's name says "Trumpster." The fan compliments his comedy. There is a pause. The fan asks how he's doing and James says "fine." The fan asks if the popularity was addicting when he was more popular. James says he's a work-a-holic. The fan says to prevent men from raping children they should go back to the Jesus days when they didn't allow gay people around children. He says you check by looking at their buttholes. He calls it "butt-hole challenge." He asks if James would pass that challenge. James asks if this is homophobic. He says he has a very gay only fans. He asks if the fan thinks your butt turns into Utah after you have gay sex. The fan says your booty hole will be like a can of coke. (I am so lost right now.) James says you push poop out of your butt every day and it doesn't make your butt like the grand canyon so he doesn't think gay men would have a gaping butt. He says it's a straight man myth.

Andy asks if James thinks he (Andy) is gay. James says he thought he was because that's how people portray him. Andy says he's not.

A guy comes on and starts ranting for a while. James uses his Onision Youtube account to say "What even is this" The guy is still ranting and James holds up a paper that says "WTF?"

The co-host comes back and says she was trying to be funny when she said the transgender thing. James says the documentary implied he made people turn out that way and that's not a thing.

The host asks if he feels he has no control when anyone can make a documentary about you. He says yeah, he feels powerless when a multi million dollar company portrays him as the next Charles Manson. She asks if it affects him emotionally. He says he's only sad for Kai, not himself. He says since 2007 he's said he would rather have 10 fans that genuinely like him than a million that don't really care. He says on his Discord he has a few people who genuinely want to be there so the rest doesn't affect him. He says when people were wrong about the meltdown videos being real, he knew they were wrong so why should that make him feel awful. He says it does present real life challenges.

The host announces Andy needs a bike to get around and needs money for pizza. She asks if Onision's offer for a bike was real. James says yes if he's willing to pick it up, but he's far away so he doesn't know if it's worth the trip.

The next gust comes on and says he looks like he's on with Jim Morrison right now. The host James this guy had 85 million views on a single video. The guy says he had 150. The host wants James to give feedback. They play the video. James asks if the goal is laughs or views. The guy says he just did it to annoy people. James says it's a funny idea and it was witty and he never would have thought of that. The host asks James if he should make more videos on a frequent basis. James says when he began they were not as good as that. The guest says the videos take a lot of time to make and he knows you need to make a lot. James says if it takes longer to make, people tend to notice how much effort you put into. He says he noticed when he puts in more effort or follows a trend it pays off.

Billy The Fridge joins. The host asks if Billy has a question for James. Billy says James followed him back on twitter that week, then James blocked him. James points out the last tweet Billy made about him from February. Billy said he made a joke tweet. Keemstar said Youtube is 16 years old and Billy said something about Onision and the age of consent. Billy says he thought it was funny and he asks James if it hurt him. James says his first thought was "what a dishonest prick" because everyone knows for a fact he isn't remotely interested in 16 year olds, but considering the position that he's in and that coming from someone he considered a friend was deeply annoying. Billy says he's sorry and he thought it was funny. James sarcastically says it's super funny to disown your friend the moment a bunch of dishonest people lie about them after he rejected them. Billy says he didn't disown him the moment- James says he was the first of his friends to be like "uh don't cancel me."

James says they had a text conversation where he described in depth how horrible of a friend Billy was because he didn't defend him and Billy's response was "yeah I know." Billy agrees, but says he defended him for years but one of his biggest defenses was that Sarah said nothing was going on between them, but when it came out it muddied two years of defense he had. James asks when what occurred? Billy says when it came out that he had sex with Sarah. James asks under what arrangement did that happen? Billy says Sarah came out and told the internet.

James says people don't know how it began. He says after he told her he couldn't do this with her, she said twice "I'm sorry for raping you guys." He says he spoke to her this January and admitted again that she said that. He says she leaves that out of every discussion because it doesn't go along with the "Onision is a psychopath" narrative. Billy agrees. James says it started through sexual extortion where somebody said "I could destroy your life if I wanted to" then later said "I'm only going to sign this agreement in which I won't say horrible things about you if you sleep with me." He says that's the arrangement she proposed to him. He says if he was interested in 16 year-olds why didn't he sleep with her when she was 16? Why did he tell her to get away from him and kick her out for being inappropriate with him 2 times? He called her names. She swore she was never groomed as an adult. She sexually extorted them, got what she wanted, got rejected when he freaked out, she apologizes, goes home, he makes a video about people with BPD, then she goes "ape" on him. He says she said in a live stream she never gave him a reason not to trust her, but now she can't do it anymore. He says this is why he knows this person isn't trustworthy because they would take something innocent and frame it a different way to fall in line with he obviously corrupt Chris Hansen.

He says during the call with Sarah, he asked if anyone was paid for the interviews and she said no. He asked if anyone made money because they were involved in the show and she said "uhh I can't legally answer that question." Billy laughs and says he got a contract from them. He says they were trying to fly out to sit down and interview him and he stopped responding because he could see the set up. He says they were struggling to keep the show together and they didn't have enough people to talk. He said he talked to the producer for an hour and a half of the phone and it didn't add up to him. He asks, what would he say anyway? James jokingly says he tried to fuck Billy so many times. Billy says he literally humped him on camera and everyone says he tried to rape him, but it was a joke.

Billy says they always joke and that's why he said the 16 thing. James says he was hitting him while he was down. Billy says James is always down. James says in the last 10 years he was the #67 most subscribed on Youtube, so he wouldn't say that was down. Billy says it's down when those videos of Shiloh come out and make him look like a psycho predator. James says actually everyone hated Shiloh for the longest time but they have selective memory.

The host asks if they could be friends again. Billy says he doesn't know if Onision wants to be friends with him and he doesn't know how they could go back with what happened. He says what happened with Sarah was why he had to step away from him. James interrupts him and says he became a white knight for women and didn't think if it was true. Billy said all he said was to listen to the girls. James asks why didn't he tell people to listen to evidence or to the person who has receipts? Billy says why not listen to all the people who want you in jail and you're not there? Billy says obviously James didn't do anything illegal.

Billy says the reason it was best to distance himself was because time and time again there were friends they had they James ghosted and made them feel worthless. James asks who? Billy says he's not going to name names. He says the last one had been at James' house for months, then James ghosted her when all this went down. James says the texts are on his website. Billy says he knows he posted them publicly and she felt like she was worthless. James says she publicly attacked them and acted like he and Kai should be in prison. James goes off about how great Kai is and keeps talking over Billy. James says apparently everyone is on good terms now and are friends again. He says they apologized because they threw Kai under the bus because they were ghosted. He said she was ghosted because the best friend Kai ever had just went public and tried to make them look awful so Kai was dealing with a trust complex. He just had his heart ripped out. Billy says that's why that person responded poorly, they had their heart ripped out by Kai's heart being ripped out. James says so Billy had one example and they have since resolved their differences and are on some of the best terms he's seen now.

Billy says there was another person who had a falling out with James who he heard went to lunch with James after. He says that was nice he made up with them.

[rolescape]

My logic is just rs taking almost the nuclear approach to dark content is like having a book store full of fiction books but instead of having the dark content books mixed in, they are behind a locked door, if someone is 13 and on the internet they should have the responsibility to avoid things they don't like. You're not their parent. Tumblr has no problem with this, it's all user hysteria from rp police. Arguably smut should guaranteed be behind a door, not whatever this dark content is.

Rolescape will be operating worldwide and will have to follow laws. Find detailed information below the cut.

"Dark content" involves a very specific kind of violent, sexual content that is written out in great detail.

In Canada, the Criminal Code forbids to write anything that specifically depicts, for a sexual purpose, a sex act between an adult and a minor that would constitute a criminal offence.

Here is the Criminal Code of Canada definition of “child pornography”, with my emphasis on the relevant subsection:

Definition of child pornography

163.1 (1) In this section, child pornography means(a) a photographic, film, video or other visual representation, whether or not it was made by electronic or mechanical means,(i) that shows a person who is or is depicted as being under the age of eighteen years and is engaged in or is depicted as engaged in explicit sexual activity, or(ii) the dominant characteristic of which is the depiction, for a sexual purpose, of a sexual organ or the anal region of a person under the age of eighteen years;(b) any written material, visual representation or audio recording that advocates or counsels sexual activity with a person under the age of eighteen years that would be an offence under this Act;(c) any written material whose dominant characteristic is the description, for a sexual purpose, of sexual activity with a person under the age of eighteen years that would be an offence under this Act; or(d) any audio recording that has as its dominant characteristic the description, presentation or representation, for a sexual purpose, of sexual activity with a person under the age of eighteen years that would be an offence under this Act. — Criminal Code

, 163.1 (1).

The expression “any written material” is key: the Law also applies to fictional material. Now the element “for a sexual purpose” is heavily linked to context. Thus, if a fic is written about a 15-year-old student who falls in love with a 28-year-old teacher and they end up having sex, I would be extra careful with how I am going to write the more intimate parts. On the other hand, writing about a relationship between two youths is fine, as long as it doesn’t break the law.

The following example makes this very clear:

"My first girlfriend turned 19 one month after I had turned 15. She was 3 years 11 months my senior. We lived in Quebec, Canada, where the law is clear about cases such as ours: A 14–15 year-old teen can legally give consent to an intimate relationship with another person, as long as this person is not 5 years older or more. Thus, in our case, me and my girlfriend were 3 years 11 months apart. My being in a relationship with her was perfectly OK with the law in my country. And I could of course write the story with very detailed accounts of each and every intimate act we did together without any worry, as long as I don’t use her real name without her consent (this is another thing — it’s relevant with privacy law)."

The bottom line is that we don't have lawyers and until we have lawyers that we can consult and ask these things to, and until we know what responsibilities and liabilities we have operating a site that contains material like this when users under the age of 18 are using it, we'd rather underpromise and overdeliver than promise something we can't deliver on.

If you have any constructive feedback regarding this, we'd like to hear it, but please keep in mind we are a free site and we also have hosting regulations to uphold, so simply just doing whatever we want isn't exactly an option given our current resources.

[soulvomit]

I’m realizing what some of my writing block is. This is why I’ve decided to only write *adult market.* I can’t write YA. I can’t even write for people who want to read YA. The narrative demands of an audience that wants everything to be Young Adult, are like handcuffs. I can’t write within those boundaries, I just can’t.  I can’t even write for people who read Adult then get mad that it’s not YA. I can’t write even for younger readers of erotica. I can only write for people with roughly my same level of social experience who are coming from the same place, who don’t require their characters to be moral paragons, or who want to read something that is coming from a different place emotionally, or... for that matter... young people who prefer to read older work.  Long winded diatribe about some of my more difficult, culturally incorrect romantic narratives I’ve written, as an example of this problem. In case you’re not going to read behind the read-more, no, I don’t write incest or pedo. (Doesn’t mean I won’t write a character who has experienced this if it comes up, I haven’t yet, but who knows. But I don’t write positive portrayals of it. I feel I need to write this disclaimer here.)  

Looking at my writing - I have some scenes I’ve written that are very passionate. It’s basically an OC fanfic type of scenario, it’s writing I did that spun off of a game setting my characters were in for a very long time, about two characters who later ended up married. (And I often do this when game groups fall apart, I start writing about my characters.) It’s some of my best writing, and I’ve often thought about filing the serial numbers off and cannibalizing this for some totally original setting. In the piece I’m looking at, the characters haven’t jumped each other’s bones yet, but there is a strong attraction between two lonely, unattached coworkers that is growing into... outright longing. These are middle aged divorcees with children. They have navigated love and lust before. They have been adults at this point for a long time. They are both sexually experienced (her, in fact, much more than him). It’s clear that they utterly want to rail each other from dusk to dawn until neither one of them can walk. Much of this is from the point of view of the male character. (And I LOVE writing het from the male point of view; it’s one of my favorite love/sex dynamics to write.) They’re definitely conscious of this attraction and in their private thoughts that I’ve written, before the attraction is consummated, there’s definitely “strong crush” energy. These are experienced, sexually mature, middle aged people who are both divorcees with children and they definitely are guessing correctly about the other person’s attraction and interest. They’re imperfect people: they’ve made bad life choices in the past. They’re equals, but it’s never *explicitly pointed out.* He’s a hypermasculine (but not toxically) and badass warrior type, she’s an engineer. She is older than he is, but that never matters and never comes up any more than the fact that I’m 6 years older than my fiance, ever comes up in our relationship. All four of us are *middle aged people* and it is just not a topic of conversation. Another thing that’s “eh” by YA standards is that The thing with how I portray and read erotic or romantic stuff, is that I am an older, experienced person, and I like stuff about older, experienced people. People who already know how to navigate these situations and don’t necessarily need everything spelled out. The thing is, I almost feel like - because of changing sexual mores - I can only write for people over 40 unless I totally rewrite the way everything goes and even the emotional temperature of their early relationship. Even though it’s very clear that my characters are absolutely mutually into each other, and it would be clear to any experienced person who navigates body language, I would have to navigate a whole new set of mores around having to outright spoonfeed my audience - we are really into tell don’t show now, we are really into long winded prefaces to everything explaining how everyone involved is really a good person, and I notice that there’s so little comprehension of nuance or subtlety now, things have to be spelled out, one character reading another person’s body language and flirting at a subtler level would be considered gross and against the present day’s mores around consent. My characters ultimately end up making out and going to bed and they never, ever talk about it and they never process it. The establishment of consent is very, very brief and amounts to one middle aged horny person basically saying “wanna fuck” to another middle aged horny person (personally, my absolute favorite way to start a relationship, that’s how my current and best relationship started, 10/10 highly recommend) and, 12 hours later, the other person pulling them into their hotel room. It’s the kind of establishment of consent that you would’ve seen in an older work and it’s not a particularly complicated dance. I didn’t write this work for public consumption outside of a handful of people and perhaps if I did, maybe I would have written it differently because I’d have to assume that “show don’t tell” doesn’t work on audiences who don’t read nuance, I don’t know. Also, in the lead up to the two characters doing the do, they totally sexually objectify each other in their heads. They think about how much they’d really, really like to pounce on each other. And this is... objectifying, or something. I always portray consent but there’s never a complicated ritual around it. I don’t enjoy writing that. Also, I really enjoy writing and reading stuff with spontaneous passion. I LOVE stuff where it’s even a little over the top.

But the big thing that seems to have changed? The big social more? It feels like you’re not really allowed to show your characters crushing too hard, or desiring too much. They’re certainly never allowed to have frustrating desire or one-sided attractions. (I’ve written lots of those. How the character acts on it or doesn’t, is going to depend upon what type of character I’m writing. I have a couple of one sided best friend crush types of dynamics that I’ve written, usually it’s same sex and incompatible sexual orientation.)   Characters are not really allowed to be horny and there seems to be a general disgust with horniness. Which is difficult to navigate because I love horny work, about horny people. I love stuff about crushes and frustrated limerence.   Also? I even love forbidden romance and forbidden sex and sometimes, and even characters doing things they’re Not Supposed To Do. (I think this is why so many people in my age group are into crime fiction, stuff about illicit affairs, etc.) I have the standard legal and moral limits, but yes I will even read about characters cheating on their spouses. It doesn’t mean I condone what the character is doing or want to do it, and it’s satisfying to see how the situation resolves. (It has to have consequences or it’s just not believable.)  

But even age differences between grown ass adults and massive social differences don’t bother me. I love reading and writing common and royal, rich and poor, people from forbidden and different social worlds.

I’m presently writing something in which a young (but adult) witch is married to an immortal god, and finds out she’s one of millions of his brides through history, and hundreds in the present time. And she is going to stay married to him because that’s part of, in my world, being the type of witch she is. OF COURSE there’s a power difference because HE’S A GOD. The story also spends a lot of time with her as a child, because I write CRADLE TO GRAVE CHARACTER DEVELOPMENT. I love to spend a character’s entire life with them, from the time they’re born to the time they die. But leaving that aside. The sweetest and most tender romance I’ve ever written, involved a sad 50something man and a 25ish year old woman. I was in my 20s when I wrote this. I had lived with the male character in my head for a long time and knew him inside and out. I was delighted when I realized that sparks were flying between him and another character, I’d lived through this character’s life story and its long history of unhappy self-sacrifice, and I decided to follow to see where it led... and it was delightful! I decided to let him have the happy ending. He deserved it after all of this time. She was the initiator of the relationship. She’s in love with him. He is a widower who’s lost everything and now he has a chance to rebuild his life and start a family with this new person. She has other suitors but wants him. She gets pregnant. But it’s narratively a blessing. She wants him, she wants their child, and he’s delighted (especially since his late wife and child are dead), it’s a matrilineal culture, she and the child will stay on the land with her family after he dies. This is a blessing for him. They’re on her family’s land and he’s an exile with no home. She is NOT a Literal Child; she is a grown-ass adult with her own agency, who is sexually experienced, and who has born a lot of responsibility, and is in a prominent social position. His existence is at the mercy of her family, though they keep him around because of his knowledge and abilities. He is the one who doesn’t initiate the relationship, because he’s conscious of the age difference and feels like an old fool, and worries she’ll tire of him one day. Who has the power? Also, he’s a “fish out of water” from another (completely fictitious) culture who ends up totally living among, and assimilating into, this new culture, and basically living out the rest of his life among them, with his bride and their children. And that’s something that isn’t supposed to happen, right? (Writers whose characters just show up in their heads, will relate to this. I don’t even pick my characters’ love interests.)