#i am not as upset about the trailer anymore

[wiredalienvampire]

< be me

< check the dhmis tag to see how the fandom is doing

< see a post stating the dhmis pilot that you have been waiting for nearly 6 years for is being shown again at Sundance

< continue scrolling down the tag

< turns out it was a mistake and they were actually showing the dhmis short "creative" at Sundance

>kill me

[isupposethisisagoodusername]

Not with comics but I relate to this so bad

I went to the comic store on my bday and issue 2 of Boy Wonder was sold out, so I drew this to cope. I’ll have to wait for my order to come in next week 🥲 literally waited months for this issue I’m so salty

[coco-loco-nut]

We Can’t Be Friends

Pairing: George Russel x Reader

Summary: George’s girlfriend, a former child actor, is not well liked by the public

TW: mentions of alcohol and drug abuse, implied child exploitation

A/n: going off of the more popular interpretation of the song (ari vs the public)

requests open!🫶 masterlist

———————

You just finished filming a short interview in a docuseries with some of your former colleagues, those who fell into the same trap and downfall as you did. You prefer not to air everything out, but you knew your statement would support the others.

The industry basically forced you into a drug and alcohol addiction, one that you thankfully beat, but you went from someone who was once loved to someone hated, just from how the media spun your name.

You met George at a hospital event -you now work as a biochemist and bioengineer- and he immediately recognized his childhood crush. You dated for a year before feeling strong enough to go public, but ever since he posted a very cute picture of you, the hate has started again.

“I’ll make a statement asking them to leave you alone,” George offers but you shake your head no. He hates seeing you upset, but both of you didn’t expect the backlash on you.

“They won’t understand, they could never even try. They will never know what it was like to grow up like that, even the docuseries won’t help,” you start to dismiss the thought.

“We can’t do nothing,” he tries to reason, wanting to protect you.

“I don’t want to tiptoe around the public, but I don’t want to hide, either way I’m feeding this fire,” you groan, running your hand through your hair as you pace the room. You had to call off of work today, the entrance to your townhome being blocked by paparazzi.

“The story is gonna die, and we’ll be alright,” George stands up and pulls you into a hug. In your mind you picture the public liking you again, waiting for their love again.

A few days later, George drags you out of the house for lunch, you had only been leaving for work. The two of you step out, a reporter immediately coming up to you. You ignore the first few, sitting in your silence.

“It’s just me and you, Baby girl,” George whispers to you, supporting you however you choose to respond.

“Y/n, is it true that you have been in and out of rehab for the past year? You are in and out of hospitals,” one reporter, who always hounds you, asks causing you to whirl around. You don’t want to argue, but you don’t want to bite, so you choose a confusing answer.

“You’ve got me misunderstood, but at least I look this good,” you smirk, watching their face scrunch in confusion, gripping their paper and pen, before continuing your walk.

The next day a clip of one of your short interviews drops, taken while you were in college, as a trailer for the docuseries release the following week.

~-~-~-

I don’t like how this industry painted me, but I’m still here hanging, just not what they made me. It’s almost like a daydream sometimes, finally leaving that world. I feel so seen, I am everything that I defined myself as, not all that the industry made me be. My truth and I may always sit in silence, but one day I hope I am brave enough to say it out loud. For now, it’s only me on the road after recovery, but maybe that’s all I need.

~-~-~-

buzzfeed.com/uk

A list of every child actor we need to apologize to after watching “Drugged: The Truth Behind the Lives of Child Actors”

1. Y/n Y/l/n

~-~-~-

“Are you sure you want to go out there?” George asks, looking at the crowds of journalists. You nod, tired of being silent and waiting for things to be better, not caring about feeding the fire anymore.

“Let’s go,” you release a shaky breath, stepping out behind your boyfriend as he walks you to work.

“Y/n! Anything to comment regarding the documentary that’s been released and the allegations made by your former colleagues?” A journalist asks, the rest hoarding, pens at the ready.

“Actually, I do. You owe us an apology. Villainizing children who needed someone like you to expose how awful our working conditions were, that’s sick and cruel. You wrote lies about us, and instead of apologizing, you want to ask us for statements and exploit our names more? You’re sick. We can’t be friends,” you chem them out before continuing on your way to work. A part of you will always wait for their love, but you are tired of waiting for them to like you.

“You’re a badass. I hope they will see you are the biochemist and bioengineer, not the child actor. You’ve come so far and I’m so proud,” George says once your breathing steadies from the adrenaline.

“Thank you, Georgie,” a small part of you wants to flip them off behind you, just like you would’ve done ten years ago, but you don’t, finally moving forward.

[steviewashere]

CW: Infertility (Coming from my own experience just...with a uterus.)

Thinking right now about Steve who wants his own family really bad, but finds out he's 100% infertile.

He only finds out after a failed marriage. His first marriage. Has a beautiful, wonderful, just absolutely incredible wife who accepts everything about his past—stuff he won't talk about and otherwise. Yet, the one thing they knew for certain was a definite in their relationship was children. However, for some reason (that I don't have), his wife rejects the idea of adopting children. So they try. They try and try and try.

Eventually, they get their eggs and sperm analyzed. Her eggs are healthy, her uterus is fine, no complications associated with her ovaries.

Steve, in his next visit, finds out he's infertile. It's not genetically caused. His parents were very fertile, just decided to have only one child. And—maybe due to some Upside Down bullshit; bat bites being untreated, injuries being too traumatic—his sperm production and his sperm vitality are completely destroyed.

He's devastated, of course he is. Brings it up to his wife. They agree to go their separate ways because this was something they both wanted, but now can't have.

And then he just floats about for a while. Quiet and disheartened.

He goes back to Hawkins and bumps into Eddie. Now, I'm thinking, personally, that this isn't some romance story. They're strictly platonic in this scenario (for now).

They get to talking and somewhere in the conversation, Steve's infertility comes up. Eddie tries to gently explain to him that there's other options to have children. "Foster care," he says, "it's where I was for a while. You can adopt from an orphanage, from a hospital. There's always the option for surrogacy, y'know. A lot of different"—

"Eds," Steve interrupts, "I appreciate this, but I...I don't want to talk about it anymore. It hurts too much to think about."

"Sorry," Eddie apologizes.

Steve just shakes his head, resigned. "It's not your fault," he murmurs, "guess I'm just upset that my body doesn't work the way it's supposed to."

"Not everybody's works the way it's supposed to, Steve."

"Yeah," he whispers, "but I was sorta hoping my own would."

There's a lull in the conversation. A long while of just silence and a cigarette being passed and the gentle rustle of trees around them. Outside, in the Forest Hills trailer park, staring down a set of rusted swings.

"How do you think I should handle this, Eddie?"

"Hm?"

"This...this body issue. What am I supposed to do about it? I'm, like...like grieving over nothing."

"You grieve, Steve," Eddie answer simply, "you get angry and you cry. That's all you can really do."

"I don't want to be angry, though. I want...I want to be happy. I want my dream to come true! I want"—he sighs and swallows and looks on ahead of him. To a place he once visited constantly when he still lived full-time in Hawkins, not just passing through. Out on a town that he once called home, a place where he couldn't be the person he wanted to be. Couldn't get what he needed.—"I want to love my kid in a way I never got."

And Eddie looks to him. To his profile. Shuffles closer, cigarette out on the porch. Arm wrapping over Steve's shoulders, tugging him in. "I know," Eddie whispers, "I'm sorry, Steve. I'm really, really sorry."

"It's not your fault, Eds."

"It's not yours either."

He keeps staring out. To a place that was hopeful. Where his dreams bared new. When things seemed reasonable and he could face everything head-on and knew exactly what he wanted for himself. A future of laughter and soft lullabies and hugs warm enough to soothe the world.

There'll be other chances. But not now. Not when he's like this.

"I know," he merely mutters, "I know."

[morganski-19]

Chills Right to the Marrow Part 10

part 1, prev part

The next day, the Chief is back looking like a man on a mission. Catching Wayne’s eye while he’s on his way in, but interrupted when the Harrington kid steps in his path. Talking to him in hushed whispers, but tense as hell.

The chief sighs, cocking his head to the side and bringing the kid to talk outside. Wayne isn’t the person to eavesdrop, but after yesterday, after the endless questions with no answers, he is desperate for an explanation.

An explanation why his kid is stuck on a hospital bed while Steve is walking around like he has every right to. Like he isn’t part of the reason his boy was halfway to dead for the past week.

What made his boy protect a person that he seemed to hate? A person who’s had everything handed to him, never had to experience real hardships. Stood on the sidelines while his boy was mocked and taunted. Ostracized for being who he was. Molded into this villain.

Kings look down on villains, seeing them as threats to their status. Their reputation. And the Harrington’s are part of the rulers of this town. Funding the high school extracurriculars, the hospital, the candidates on the ballots. Money that, in the grand scheme of reality, Wayne couldn’t give a shit where it goes.

Until it comes between him, his kid, and their lives. Eddie could’ve died, and for what? So the rich can keep being that? So they can keep coming out on top.

Wayne understands why Eddie would throw himself into danger for Dustin. Hell, he probably would have done the same thing. But Steve Harrington. Wayne’s not so sure that’s the path he would choose.

Taking the last cigarette from the pack, Wayne positions himself near the corner of the hospital. Hearing the Chief and Harrington talking right around the bend. Taking a long drag, he tilts his ear up to listen.

Living in a trailer park made everyone a secret gossip. Wayne just never thought he was going to do it like this.

“What about Owens?” Steve’s not so hushed voice carries around the corner. “He seems to be the one to fix all your problems.”

Wayne can hear the annoyance in the Chief’s voice. “Either still in hiding or avoiding my calls. I’ve had to go through his partner for all of this.”

“We need to fix this, Hop, and fast. Eddie can’t be pinned for this shit.”

“I know.” The Chief takes a deep breath. “But the town needs a fall guy. I can’t take the cuffs off just yet.”

Steve hisses a breath. “He’s been getting better. Doesn’t have the ventilator anymore, could wake up any day now. He doesn’t deserve to wake up thinking the town still hates him for something he was a victim of.”

“Kid, I know but I can’t-.”

Steve cuts him off. “I saw how effected his was by all this, Hop. I saw how upset he was thinking the town thought he could do that to her. To all of them. All of them willing to pick up their pitchforks to hunt the freak. He was terrified.”

Wayne feels the anger start to simmer up again. Hearing this kid put words in his boy’s mouth. Saying that he knows everything.

Maybe he does. Maybe Wayne’s blowing this all out of proportion. But he can’t help it. He’s tired, his hope is running dry. One wrong move and he’ll snap. Harrington’s just an easy target.

“I hear you,” the Chief’s voice raises. “But I really can’t-.”

Steve cuts his off again. “Yes, you can and that is the whole problem.”

“No, I can’t.” The hushed screams turn to louder reprimands. “Until the Feds get what they want, I’m powerless here.”

“But if it was El, that would be a completely different story, wouldn’t it?”

Even though Wayne can’t see them, the silence is so thick not even the sharpest blade could cut through it. Steve pushed the wrong button.

“Don’t go there, Steve.” The quiet anger in the Chief’s voice is enough to make anyone step down.

Steve doesn’t. “I am going there.” Steve’s voice has almost reached a yell. Full of anger of his own. “You do everything when it’s affecting you, and the people you care about. But as soon as it’s someone else that might get the fall, you step back and say you can’t do a damn thing.”

“I can’t do a damn thing,” the Chief booms.

“Yes. You. Can,” Steve yells right back. “If it were El, or Joyce, or Will, hell even Mike there strapped to that table right now, the cuffs would have been off the second you came back. No matter what. You would have taken the fall of that. You would have taken the Fed’s anger about it. You would have fucking done something about it. Why not now?”

Before the Chief can even answer the question, Steve is walking away with a huff. Not even noticing Wayne as he walks right back to the parking lot and slams the door of his fancy car. Driving away faster than he should.

Wayne might be directing the anger that sits in his chest at the wrong person.

But all of that doesn't seem to matter anymore. Almost immediately as his sits back in the hospital room, ready for nothing to happen. Eddie opens his eyes.

next part

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[starscabaret]

☆Meeting Yandere! Vincent ☆

pairing: yandere! Vincent x fem reader 

summary: Meeting Vinny <333

warnings: n/a 

authors note: 

Vincent had brushed into the small town a few months earlier on a contract for his engineering firm. The job paid well and he had little to no attachment anywhere so he made the move. He lived in an upscale condo about 30 minutes out from the actual town he’d be working in. Paid for by the company of course. 

He had a routine, call mom once a week, send a letter once a month, go to work every weekday, go to the gym every weekday, grocery shop on Sundays, and get a haircut every 3 weeks. Not much changed for him really unless it was necessary. 

He liked it that way, in his free time he drew, invested, and dabbled in a few books and tv. He wouldn’t call himself the happiest man alive, but he was getting by, and his mom was doing well. That’s all he ever wanted. 

Just like any other day on the job site Vincent set in his small office inside the mobile trailer going over blueprints and whatnot. That is until you came banging on the flimsy trailer door. Vincent thought the damn police were here. Lo and Behold when he opened the door there you were in pajamas, and slippers, and sleep still in your eyes. 

As soon as the door opened you spoke, “Look man, I really was nice at first and didn’t say anything but do y’all have to be so loud at 7 am? It’s waking me and my son.”

Vincent stood there deadpan he didn’t know what to reply. There was nothing he could really do to delay construction in the early hours without derailing the whole project. And normally he would have slammed the door in your face had it been anyone else. But you, you made his heart beat fast and he blanked on a response. Besides the fact that he was a man of very few words.

“Come in.” He said as he pulled you into the office like trailer.

“You seem to be the boss sir, is there anything you can do?” You said while rubbing your eyes.

“You must live in the house a few acres over, what’s your name?” He spoke low and grumbly.

“Yeah I do, it’s a family house but no one gives a shit anymore. All moved off to the big city, scared of the water. Oh, Im f/n l/n” you replied in an annoyed tone.  

“I can’t tell them to halt all work in the morning is there anything I can do instead?” He asked, wanting to remedy this. He didn’t want to upset you. You were alluring to him. This was also the most he had spoken to anyone in days.

“You come to explain to my son why you’re disrupting his sleep!” you said with irritation in your voice.

When Vincent got to your home to apologize to your son, he was met with Ben. Ben was a 3-year-old beautiful Doberman. 

Vincent was a bit relieved it was a dog and not a child, as he was already daydreaming about how he would give you your first child.

Vincent didn’t speak much or have the best social skills but he knew that his interest in you wasn’t normal. Nor did he know how to express such interest.

Good thing you found him handsome, and took interest in his quiet reserved demeanor. You had to know more, you had to dig past the surface. You were bold and willing to take charge and make the moves. You had never seen a man like him in your town before, or anywhere for that matter. 

You were happy you went and complained that morning. Who said complaining didn’t get you anywhere?

[poguemunson]

The Morning After

Eddie Munson x Reader (1.3k)

note: i haven’t written anything for months so i am a little rusty so please take it easy on me. if you have any requests please send them my way!

buy me a kofi masterlist

Summary: You try to sneak out the morning after sleeping with your best friend, Eddie because you think he will regret it.

Warnings: suggestive themes (mentions of sex), slight angst, insecure!reader, mentions of alcohol, misunderstanding

******

This is not your room.

This is not your bed.

That is, however, your clothes littered on the floor.

That is your best friend, sleeping next to you, equally as naked as you are.

You are never drinking again.

Running a hand through your hair, you begin to curse yourself. You’re trying to remember the events that took place the last night, pieces of memories coming together hazily.

You had turned up to Eddie’s trailer, upset and in need of comfort and reassurance. You had yet another failed date and you were feeling like shit about yourself. When you thought about the last time you genuinely felt happy, of course, your best friend of seven years was the first person to come to mind.

What you didn’t plan on was the pair of you getting wasted and hooking up.

Sure, the reason the dates were failing was that you were head over heels for your best friend. But your drunk brain decided to go for the kiss and let fate take over the rest.

“Fuck, fuck,” You murmured to yourself. The last thing you wanted to do was wake Eddie up with your panic.

Did Eddie just feel sorry for you? Did he just feel obligated to go through with something with you because he believed you couldn’t handle another failed experience with a boy?

That had to be it.

During the seven years of friendship, Eddie had never shown any interest that wasn’t platonic. He was flirty but that was just Eddie, right?

You had to get out of there.

You quickly dressed as quietly as you could. The last thing you wanted was to face Eddie. You wouldn’t be able to handle seeing the look of regret etched onto his face.

Eddie would never actively go for someone like you. You’re his best friend. The one stable thing, apart from Uncle Wayne, that he had in his life and you had screwed that up for him.

You spared a glance at Eddie. He was still seemingly asleep. He looked peaceful, you could’ve sworn there was a slight smile on his lips. You tried your hardest to try to remember him this way.

Maybe Eddie wouldn’t want to see you anymore after this. Would he do that?

You couldn’t begin to think about it. You pushed yourself out of the room, sending a thank you to whoever upstairs made sure that this event happened the day Uncle Wayne wasn’t home from the night shift yet.

Stepping out of the trailer, you closed the door as quietly as you could. You cringed when it made a loud squeak.

“Please don’t wake up,” You whispered. You would cross your fingers if your hands weren’t shaking so badly.

You waited a minute to see if you could hear any movement in the trailer, trying to determine whether to make a run for it or not. Once you were sure the coast was clear, you turned to leave, freezing when you caught the eyes of one of Eddie’s neighbours.

Maxine. You recognised her as one of Dustin’s friends. You had seen her around him a few times in town.

You put your hand up in an awkward wave to which she raised an eyebrow at you in reply before she made her way into her trailer. You were just praying she didn’t decide to call up Dustin to let him know that she had witnessed his babysitter doing the walk of shame.

Guess today wasn’t your day.

You stopped in your tracks once you felt the cold water drop land on your arm.

Yeah. Today wasn’t looking up apparently.

Looks like you get to enjoy a nice walk home in the rain. Fantastic. Just fantastic.

“You’re still here.”

You almost jumped out of your skin at the sound of his voice. He had always been good at sneaking up on people. Of course, it helps when you’re zoned out, focusing on the horror of a day you’ve been having. It doesn’t look like it’s even 9 AM yet.

“Yeah,” You let out an awkward laugh, turning to face him but making a conscious effort not to make eye contact, “Was just about to head off.”

He was now dressed. His hair was a mess from his sleep and their night together. If you closed your eyes, you could probably still imagine how it felt to run your fingers through it.

“Run away, don’t you mean?” Eddie questioned. You hadn’t heard it before but there was no mistaking the hurt in his tone. You finally met his gaze.

“I’m not running away,” You replied.

Eddie scoffed, “Okay, so what is this then?”

He raised a hand to gesture to you standing outside his trailer. You could practically feel your throat go dry.

“I didn’t let anyone know I wasn’t coming home last night. I don’t want to worry anyone,” You told him. It wasn’t a total lie but it wasn’t the whole truth. You just didn’t want to own up to the fact that you were ferried that if you stayed around Eddie any longer, you would start apologising.

“Just because I’m yet to graduate high school doesn’t mean that I’m that dumb,” Eddie shot back. You opened your mouth and then closed it before taking a deep breath.

“I know you’re not dumb.”

“So tell me the truth,” Eddie leaned his back against the entry of the trailer.

“I didn’t want to face you,” You admitted.

“And why’s that?” Eddie countered.

“I didn’t want to see you mad at me. I didn’t want to stand here and do exactly what we are doing right now because it’s mortifying. I get that it means I’m running away from my problems but from where I’m standing right now, that doesn’t sound like a bad idea,” You stated with a shake of your head.

“You’re that embarrassed?” Eddie quizzed. You let out a scoff.

“I’m sorry that last night happened. I get that you regret it, okay? We don’t need to have this conversation. You don’t feel that way about me. End of story,” You told him.

Eddie’s eyes widened a fraction before laughing loudly at you. You have never been a violent person but right now? You wanted to clock him.

“Can you stop laughing at me?”

“You beautiful idiot,” Eddie laughed, running a hand down his face. You raised an eyebrow at him.

“Are you complimenting me or insulting me?” You asked. Eddie shook his head in disbelief before taking a step closer to you.

“Both,” He replied before cradling your face in his hand and pressing his lips to yours. Your brain was going haywire because what the fuck?

His lips were so soft. Somehow softer than they were last night and you couldn’t help but completely melt into him.

Before you remembered.

“Wait,” You pulled away from him, his lips already trying to chase yours, “I don’t understand.”

Eddie laughed, his hand going to your cheek again to ensure you looked him in the eyes.

“I thought you regretted last night,” Eddie said.

“Why the fuck would I- Oh.”

You were both idiots.

“So… you don’t regret it?” You questioned.

“Are you kidding? I’ve been in love with you since we were kids,” Eddie informed, beginning to trail kisses down your neck, your eyes fluttering close at the feeling, “The only thing I regret is that I don’t remember everything.”

You pulled away with a smile, reaching for his hand and tugging him back towards the opened door of his trailer.

“I say we get a do-over.”

Eddie’s lips curled into a grin before wrapping his arms around your waist to hoist you over his shoulder to get you back into his room faster.

“What are we waiting for then?”

[randomnameless]

Why do the FEH devs insist on ignoring Nabatean lore so much?

I recently had a surprisingly cordial discussion on redshit with someone about the "nabateans = colonisers" take, and one of the main points raised was that the game was purposedly foggy around Nabateans/Sothis/their story because it would obviously favor a certain narrative (and thus make another narrative look, uh, not that marketable anymore).

To be honest, we still ended up with a product that had a lead go "this race and its blood* is the reason why the world sucks" and yet that lead is still marketable enough to have raunchy cipher cards and 5 FEH alts, so I actually wonder if, while pissing on that lore had that purpose, it was ultimately pointless since Supreme Leader can still sell goodies despite her incarnation in FE16.

And not only Supreme Leader - but the entirety of WC where we basically have 70% of the cast crying/complaining about their "mixed blood" or lack of and basically adding their 10 cents to the "this race and its blood is the reason why the world sucks".

I mean, can you imagine Sylvain selling any goodies and alts if Flayn replied to his "wah wah people only are kind to me and want to fuck me because I have Nabatean blood :(" by some uncharacteristic "good for you, I have to hide my ears, had to dye my hair, have to lie about my family because if the truth is found out about my identity, I will be hunted and vivisected like an animal and harvested for parts by people who call my kin abominations - just like what happens in the game where the same people who call my kin "abominations" ally with a classmate who calls me a creature and pretends I am incapable of human feelings based on my race".

FE Fodlan's main selling point is its cast of students, for various reasons, but even if I tried to kid myself, Nopes and FEH made it clears : students are the main selling point.

If you spare more time and attention to the Nabatean plot/lore, the students either grow from "likeable" to "despicable" or worse, you won't gaf about them because yeah sure, Hilda might be upset because people expect things from her due to her crust, but it would feel like a "peanut" compared to Seteth's irrational (granted, it's not so irrational since GW exists) fear that Flayn's newest friends would dissect her if they learnt she was a Nabatean, and being conflicted by finally letting her have human friends and form bonds she crave, or protect her due to the trauma from the genocide of their species.

Don't get me wrong, I love peanuts, I mean, not everyone can have a tragik of loaded backstory!

And yet, given how this verse's DNA is "can you fight against the red emperor who uwus about you", they had to add copious amounts of Earl Grey to their games so there's no clear-cut factions :

The "Your alien blood and its influence on the world corrupted it, so I want to reform it under my command" vs "I don't want to die and you oppose me due to my race and side with the people who genocided my kin"

is turned to :

"Your alien blood Crests and its your church's influence on the world corrupted it, so I want to reform it under my command"

"I don't want to die and you oppose me due to my race and side with the people who genocided my kin"

Sprinkle with the cast's hammering here and there that the "reforms" might be needed - but never develop on what they are - and add a few baseless and groundless takes as a toping (basically everything Claude says about tolerance and the general "isolationism/foreign policy" stuff) and you get FE Fodlan where the Red Emperor's war isn't seen as the catastrophe it is in the other entries from the series!

Now, for FEH...

FWIW, the F!F!Billy's trailer had them try to explain that Sothis was a bit pissed about her slaughtered/massacred children when Nopes never gave any reason about why she was pissed - maybe on Billy's behalf bcs Jerry's dead, but come on, she would indeed deserve the medal of the worst parent in the franchise if that was the case, since Billy can murder her daughter without Sothis taking over ! - but given that they cannot write/go against the source game those characters are from.

They tried a bit, with B!Supreme Leader and Hegemongard's FB, but then it stopped (because she had no "new unit" released since then lol) and I can understand why : Hegemongard came out before the Supreme Emblem, and Hegemongard hates dragons who are seen/perceived as gods by some of their human followers. Come FE17, and now Supreme Emblem accepts Alear because they are "one of the good ones". We can come up with HCs and details and talk about what are emblems or if Hegemongard's views were only hers at the end of AM all day long... But imo, Doylist wise, it still feels it's a retcon because the devs from the main games tried to scrap and remove the most "controversial" traits she had.

For the other characters... Well, you see what Marianne is in FEH (but even in her base games), she's one of the few characters who reacts - in a way - to the partial history about relics and demonic beasts and all... only to give sad uwus to Maurice.

FE16 (and Nopes) refused to have any "student" character react to the Nabatean lore/reveal, about what are relics and all. There are no lines, Claude shared some knowledge in the explore section of VW's last chapter, but we don't have anyone muse or think or even talk about what are relics, what are crests, and what kind of fuckery their ancestors or the ancient humans of Fodlan did.

With that in mind, FEH can't do much : either they write Marianne in a retcon-y way like what happened for Hegemongard (and they're not afraid to piss on characterisation, look at Lyon!), or they flanderise her "character" and develop her around 3 lines she had in the game in her paralogue, and continue to give sad uwus about Momo when he was at best a guy who slaughtered and murdered so much that he abused the Nabatean turned into a relic to the point where he turned in a demonic beast even if he had a matching crest, or at worst, had been part of Nemesis's piñata party in Zanado and was something of a genocider.

Tldr :

Why FE Fodlan never gaf about Nabateans : earl grey + the marketable cast has to stay marketable and you can't sell peanuts at the same price you'd sell swordfish

Why FEH dgaf about Nabatean lore : they can't afford to retcon characters + they have to sell peanut alts with the same seasoning they had in their base game.

For what it's worth though, I think FEH is more daring than the base game(s) given how they gave more lines and screentime to Rhea - through her different alts - than GW. And they even designed her Halloween!alt's lines to piss on some of Claude's assertions, while the various FB involving members of the church also - indirectly - reply to some accusations thrown their way in FE16 when, FE16, never gave them an opportunity or lines to explain that those takes were full of dung.

*"but random, maybe she doesn't know that the crests she often decries is "dragon blood"!"

It's highly debatable, especially given what she and Hubert throw to Billy in CF - but even if she doesn't, Doylist wise we still have a character who, knowingly or not, says "this race and its blood* is the reason why the world sucks" and who is never called out on her prejudice. That's more of an issue regarding the general writing though, she has to be a red emperor and took pages from Ashnard's book, and yet, the player must still feel bad and want to romance her, so her mindest/goal cannot be looked at too closely, because, I guess, even the devs thought it would be difficult to romance her (thus sell goodies!) if more light was shed on the "blood from this race corrupts our people" schtick -> which in turn would also make characters whose backstory and gimmick rely on "crying about crests" be way less likeable, thus marketable and able to sell goodies.

[agentem]

The Con Artist

I mentioned before that Jac Schaffer often calls Agatha a "con artist." I think I am late figuring this out because she did it in episode 2, but I think I know what the con is.

She claims to be a survivor of the Witches' Road (she might be but the fact that it's out there on the internet seems sus; she's advertising), other witches come to her when they "need something" from the Road. These are the shots of her luring groups of witches into the woods in the trailers.

Then she tricks them into blasting her with their powers. Rio gets the bodies. She gets the power. That's exactly what she did in Episode 2, when she tried to goad them into attacking her.

So when Rio shows up, I think she's thrown off. Not only is she NOT working with Rio anymore, Rio seems to think they are going to run the con the same as before ("I get my bodies"). But Agatha doesn't want anything to happen to Teen, for sure. Whether he is Nicky or Billy he is still a child and she shies away from hurting kids (like the Salem Seven).

IDK if she cares about Alice or Lilia, but I think she also has a bit of a liking to Jen. She never went after Jen before so we know she respects her on some level--when Teen is in danger it is Jen she turns to ("Jen, Jen, what do you need?"). I think she also feels very comfortable bitching at Jen in a way that is kind of sisterly. She likes that Jen gives it right back. ("A little rusty there, Jen."/"A little traitorous there, Agatha.") Jen's kind of a bitch and Agatha likes that about her.

Do I think she'd sacrifice Jen to save herself? Definitely. But she also is thrown off by the Road actually opening. Maybe she doesn't love or care for Alice or Lilia, but she might need them.

So she's like, "Hey, Rio, if I flirt with you a lot maybe you will go along with not murdering these people??? Look how good my tits look." And she also attempts to warn the other witches that Rio is dangerous.

But I don't think Rio really cares if they know what she is after. She's fairly upfront about who she is. ("The Green witch!") And she's not ashamed about wanting the bodies. And even though she gets the message about Agatha actually trying to work with this Coven, she still goes to Agatha later. Agatha might read her saying, "That boy is not yours" as her saying "you will never have a (human) family" or whatever but I don't think that's how Rio meant it. I don't think she liked seeing Agatha upset (again).

And I think part of Agatha's anger at herself after Alice's death (when she scoffs at Teen for thinking he can be a good witch) is that she did try to not kill this group. And it happened anyway. She feels like her mother was right. That she was born evil and there is nothing else she can be.

(But I really just want a scene where Rio is like "Oh you don't wnat to kill anyone anymore? Okay fine I still love you." Rio is attracted to Agatha initially because she has this talent. But if you loved someone who was, say, a wonderful artist and they stopped painting, would you love them less?)

[cthulhuwritesstuff]

Okay, another theory/prediction/I am probably wrong time.

I am thinking about “You Will Be Okay” and there’s this strange gut feeling I have listening to it now, all because of Octavia’s line “You never loved mother, you don’t love me, you love him”, which is the only line we hear her say in the trailer.

The only reason I could think of that would make Octavia sound that broken and sad, and to actually say those words is that something much bigger is about to happen.

And that something was already foreshadowed in the second episode.

Stolas is immortal, he aged to a point and now he is just immortal. Him singing to Octavia how she will be okay even when the Hell colapses, even when he is gone is a very beautiful gesture and it paints a picture of how much he loves her.

But also, what if it’s a foreshadow of what is about to happen to Stolas?

Here’re my thoughts:

Stolas loses his powers and status, and it is somehow connected to Blitz and Grimoire, or his marriage, or all of it. We already know this is a possibility, this isn’t news.

Right here, this scene that’s been bugging me cause “Why is he not using his powers to defend himself and Blitz”, would make perfect sense if we were to consider he doesn’t have his powers anymore.

That gray streak in his hair? He’s actually aging now, it’s natural now. He’s not immoral anymore.

Also, no cape. I know it might seem like a minor detail. But Stolas, unless in his robe, always wears his cape, as a royal he is (or was).

Now, what I am concerned about is what will happen to his relationship with Octavia. I would hate to see her hurt, but Stolas losing his immortality “because of Blitz” would really hurt her.

“You said you’d never leave”, I can see her saying that, being upset by that, referencing their moment at Loo Loo Land, and that right there might be a good moment to put in that line from the trailer. It would make sense and it would be so sad.

I also think we will get a song from Octavia.

I think this scene is from that song.

That star tear she is about to catch really reminds me of the stars Stolas and her were supposed to see together; stars that symbolize all dreams and wishes that never came to be. What if she is watching the star of her dad’s wish to forever be with her die?

Not enough pain? Okay.

Considering the colors in this scene and their scene in the second episode, what if this song (if there is a song… let’s say there is a song for the sake of this theory) is Octavia’s mirror song to her lullaby— “I will be okay” as she is coming to terms with Stolas’ newly acquired mortality.

This pains me to my core. I hope they don’t drift apart. I hope Stolas gets to have a good relationship with her still, whatever happens.

I hope I am wrong!

[trypo-p]

With the whole Tango Gameworks situation going down, I wanted to make a statement about it as a teen with mental health issues.

I remember playing the game the day of release. My Dad saw the trailer and thought I'd like it, so he asked if I wanted to play it with him (I play, he watches type scenario). I said yes. If I had said no, I don't know where I'd be today.

Immediately as the game started up, I fell in love. The art style, the colours, the atmosphere, the animation, the characters themselves; it was my dream game. All I ever wanted in life was a rhythm game where EVERYTHING goes with the beat, it had bright colours and relatable characters. This was it. My dream game.

Ever since, I have never stopped loving the game. It was perfect for me. As someone who's neurodivergent, I always found it hard to find just the right game. I hate the thought of liking new things. But this game is everything to me. I beat the game pretty quickly, and then I beat it again. And again. And again.

It was easy to say I found my newest special interest, and my highest one at that.

The game had changed me so much. I found it in January, the month it came out. January is always a shitty month for me because that's the month for me most people call their "depression season".

The days prior, I was at my worst. I almost ended my life several times because I couldn't feel anything anymore. Then once my dad showed me this game, it was like I had found a purpose. I know I shouldn't be getting attached to pixels on a screen, but if you're a mentally ill autistic teenager who can't get enough of music, then that's pretty damn hard.

I found myself coping with this game. Chai is the most relatable character in quite literally all media. It's like I *am* him. He has flaws and it shows, and that's what I like. He has flaws, and he *reasonably* learns from them. That's one thing that makes him SO relatable. I feel happy knowing that there's some fictional character that *gets* me.

With over 500 hours in play time and having the game beat 9 times, we're here now. With the news that Tango Gameworks had everyone cut off. A game studio that experimented with a game, had it work wonders, and then suddenly that's "not enough" according to Microsoft? But why? It was doing so well. We all loved it. Is Microsoft THAT out of touch?

Me, and many others were left heartbroken. I'm still extremely upset about this whole situation. I plan on making a tribute to Tango Gameworks soon.

So, my final message about this is

Thank you, Tango Gameworks.

Hi-Fi RUSH made me a better person. I've put many hours into the game, I've beaten it many times, hell I've even cosplayed Chai. I cannot stress this enough, Thank you for saving my life.

[darishima]

JUST WATCHED THE OP LIVE ACTION TRAILER HERE ARE MY THOUGHTS THAT NOBODY ASKED FOR

-NAMI IS SO FUCKING GORGEOUS

-SANJI'S EYEBROWS ARE NORMAL IM SO UPSET :( I NEED MY CURLYBROW COOK (ALSO MOST OF ZORO'S INSULTS WONT WORK ANYMORE) I GET THAT IT WOULD BE HARD TO MAKE WORK IN LIVE ACTION BUT STILL !! THAT ONE EDIT THAT WENT AROUND OF TAZ SKYLAR AS SANJI PRE TRAILER MADE THE EYEBROWS LOOK REALLY GOOD SO IT WAS DOABLE :(((

-ALSO WE SAW SANJI'S LEFT EYE IN THE UNDERWATER SCENE WHICH FEELS. SO WRONG??? I DONT LIKE THAT

-THANK GOD USOPP'S NOSE IS NORMAL THAT WOULD NOT HAVE WORKED

-THE "TENSION IN THE CREW" LINE WAS VERY UN-LUFFY BUT I WILL REFRAIN FROM PASSING FULL JUDGEMENT ON HIS CHARACTERIZATION UNTIL THE SHOW COMES OUT

-THE CLIP OF ZORO FIGHTING... AND ZORO IN GENERAL... <3333

-KOBY WAS ONLY SHOWN FOR 0.4 SECONDS BUT HE LOOKS SO GOOD I CANT WAIT

-LUFFY ANNOUNCING HIS MOVES IS KINDA CRINGE BUT IN A CUTE WAY I LIKE IT

-THE CGI ON HIS STRETCHY ARMS LOOKS PRETTY GOOD WHICH IS THE MAIN THING I WAS WORRIED ABOUT

-THE SEA KING LOOKS SO FUCKING GOOD HELLO ??? AND SHANKS ??? OMG

-I LIKE BUGGY'S LOOK HONESTLY, ITS NOT WHAT I WAS EXPECTING BUT I DONT SEE HOW ELSE YOU COULD TRANSFER THE CLOWN LOOK OF THE ANIME INTO LIVE ACTION. GOING FULL THROTTLE CREEPY KILLER VIBES WORKS I THINK

IN CONCLUSION WHILE I HAVE A COUPLE CONCERNS I AM SO SO SO FUCKING EXCITED FOR THIS AND I REALLY THINK ITS GONNA BE GOOD OVERALL !!! IM PRAYING FOR A SEASON TWO SO I GET MY ANGEL ROBIN IN LIVE ACTION :)))

[ritz-writes]

OKAY. I know the s4 specials aren't going to be out for awhile, but I'm saying this here and now-

TAG. YOUR FUCKING. SPOILERS.

I don't care how small it is. If it's a huge fucking plot twist, if it's a design for a character, if it's a screenshot of a tiny flower that's only shown in the corner of the screen. TAG IT. IF IT'S FROM THE SPECIALS, TAG IT.

And be specific!! There's gonna be a difference now between s4 vs s4 specials. I still want to be able to look at new art and not worry about spoilers. When you are using a tag--not if, WHEN--put 'specials' with it. And if you don't, at least put s4 spoilers.

monkie kid spoilers, lmk spoilers, lmk s4 spoilers, lego monkie kid season 4 spoilers, lmk s4 specials, lego monkie kid specials. I don't care. Just put. Something. And tell your followers what tag(s) you are using so they can filter accordingly.

I got spoiled for SO MANY THINGS in s4. I started crying at one point and hurt my arm punching the air, I was so upset. Some people are okay with learning stuff before watching it, most are not. I am one of those people. I don't even watch trailers anymore cuz I want to be surprised. People can call me over reactive, I don't care. This is how I enjoy media, and a lot of others do the same.

So, please, for the love the fandom, TAG. YOUR. POSTS.

Thank you

[lady0lunamoon]

Okay! My honest opinion on "Miraculous World: Paris"?

It was AMAZING!!!!

Lot's of action, some funny moments, very emotional and lots of tension!

One thing I especially love is how the Special wastes absolutely no time with getting straight into the action!

Something I hate about many movies is how they just waste so much time setting up the plot that by the time it finally gets to the good stuff, half the movie is already over!

The writers really have my respect for not doing that here! After the opening, they waste no time and immediately get straight to the actual plot!

Another thing i really love about the special is the way they handled Shadybug and Claw Noir!

I kept saying that Shady and Claw have the potential to become the best Miraculous villains ever, even if they get redeemed, and as far as I'm concerned, i was totally right about that because these two are officially my favorite Miraculous villains!!! 🖤

[WARNING!! SPOILERS AHEAD!!!]

For one, I love villains like Shadybug who are driven by a desire to not be hurt anymore!

I felt so bad for her when she cried while reading Marinette's diary! 😢

And I found it so touching how she first acted cold and rude towards Sabine but quickly backtracked on her attitude, when Sabine continued to speak kindly to her!

It showed that Shadybug wished she'd have a loving mother like that and she'd actually be grateful for it!

I am truly touched by how vurnerable she looked throughout that entire scene!

💔💔💔

🖤And I absolutely love how sassy and unhinged Claw Noir is!🖤

The guy freaking cataclysmed himself ON PURPOSE FOR NO APPEARANT REASON!!

At least I can't think of a reason why he did that! And even while cataclysmed, he still managed to put up one heck of a fight throughout the entire special!!

And It's very interesting how his motivation is a lot like Monarch's, but at the same time not!

Claw Noir does want his mother back, but he seems more hurt by the fact that his father doesn't seem as upset as he is!

Although it's not that hard to read the signs that Shadyverse!Gabriel infact is impacted by his wife's death!

If I had to guess, it looks very much like Claw THOUGHT his father easily moved on and continued to focus on his work as a fashion designer and forgot about Emily, while what he was really doing was using the butterfly miraculous to create superheroes and trying to stop the Supreme, most likely to create a safe world for their son!

I also love how both Shady and Claw wear different masks to hide their sadness : Shadybug acts cold and unfeeling while Claw Noir is more outgoing and unhinged! Claw is basically that one character who is a little b*tch but is just too charismatic to hate!

[SPOILERS OVER]

There might've been a few things I had hoped to see in the special that weren't there, but that's okay because a lack of one or two good possible elements is still better than the presence of multiple bad elements — which mind you was NOT present in this special at all!

The show often has some moments that really made me cringe, but I couldn't find a SINGLE bad moment in this special!

[SPOILERS]

So the fact that we didn't get much personal father-son drama between Batterfly and Claw Noir (Which was justified since, contrary to what i assumed, they don't know each others secret identities) or the fact that neither CelesteCat's white suit and hair nore Claw Noir's giant Cataclysm triggered Ladybug's Chat Blanc PTSD (because we don't talk about this enough in Season 5) don't bother me much!

My worries about Ubiquity, despite being featured heavily in promotional material, barely appearing in the actual special (because she only had one appearence in all the trailers) were also put to rest! Even though Alya isn't Ubiqity for long at first, she still gets turned back into her a few times! Giving her enough screentime that I see no reason to get mad over her being promoted so much even though she doesn't actually stick around throughout the entire special!

[SPOILERS END]

Whoever says this show lost it's touch should definetly watch this!

Which is another little meta detail I really love in this special :

'Hope' is a central theme in the special, and it was so good that it also gave me hope that the show can return to it's former glory!

Despite a lot of controversy surrounding the show for quite a while now, this special proves that, just like Shadybug, Claw Noir and Batterfly's world, the show itself can also still be saved!

[queenshelby]

The Fourth Season (Part Five)

Pairing: Cillian Murphy x Reader

Warning: Age Gap (20 Years), Fluff, Angst

Words: 3,456

Notes: In this Fic, Cillian is 40 and the Reader is 20. Cillian is divorced and the Reader is single. This is not based on Cillian’s real life.

PLEASE COMMENT AND ENGAGE!

Two days had passed and Cillian seemed to have avoided you as much as possible following the kiss you shared. You had never spoken about it again and he seemingly tried hard to stay away from you. He wanted to forget all about it and the way your lips tasted on his, but this was an almost impossible task. .

Luckily for you both though, you had no scenes together until today and, whenever you saw him, you tried your best to act professionally. You remained polite but distant which was something that did not go unnoticed on set.

Natasha and Steven saw that something was wrong with you. You were saddened and hurt while Cillian’s attitude between takes had become depressing. You kept away from others and were not your usual cheerful self and neither was Cillian. Your spark was gone and it was almost like you were upset about something.

“Are you okay?” Natasha thus asked you over and over again throughout the past two days and your answer remained the same.

“I am fine” you told her, but every time you saw Cillian, your mood changed and the truth was that you were not fine. You were hurt, confused and annoyed as all you could think about was this kiss you shared.

It was so intense and passionate that it made your body shiver with pleasure and, whilst you wanted answers from him as to why he kissed you back, you knew that you needed to let it go. Your work was worth more than that and so was your career.

Working on Peaky Blinders was a dream come true for you and you did not want to ruin your performances by confronting Cillian about something he seemingly considered to have been a mistake. You still had a few important scenes come up which you had to film together and you needed to remain calm. He was an executive producer and this meant that he would have a say on who comes and goes and thus, if he wanted to see you gone, there was not much you could do about it.

But it was not just the moment you shared that was on your mind. The fact that Cillian avoided you bothered you as you also simply enjoyed his company as well. You loved his usual funny and childish nature. He was unlike anyone else you had ever met before and the way he was treating you now was upsetting to you.

It was almost like he tried to exclude you from whatever he was doing and this, in turn, affected your performance notably.

You knew that Cillian must have regretted the kiss but an explanation was all that you needed from him. Why did he return the kiss if he did not want you?

***

Just as you were pondering on about the moment you shared with Cillian in his trailer two days ago, James made an appearance right in front of you. Over the past few days, he had become overly attentive towards you again and tried to get you to go out with him, just for one night, so that the two of you could talk.

But, you did not feel like talking to him. There wasn’t anything you had to discuss with this man. He had left you in the most horrible way and you were glad for the fact that you were not together anymore. Everyone told you that you had dodged a bullet and that was probably true. Especially your best friend back home, Emma, said to avoid him at all costs and now, here you were, right with the man you hated the most.

***

“Can I get you a drink? I am just doing a coffee run” he said and you shook your head.

“No thanks” you were quick to respond in a snappy kind of way but he would not let it go.

“Okay. I get that you are still angry with me but I am trying to be nice here” James then said and, whilst it was obvious to you that he wanted you back, you did not want anything to do with him.

“And I appreciate that, but I do not need you to be nice. I just need you to leave me alone” you snapped, but it was not even James’s fault that you were in a bad mood. It was Cillian’s fault. He was there, not far away from you and ignored your sheer presence once again.

“Honestly Y/N. Please, just give me a chance. I just want to talk” James then said while trying to reach for your hands and this certainly caught Cillian’s attention now.

His eyes were on you and James and he appeared to be rather annoyed by James’s interaction with you.

“Let me take you out for the night. Just like in the old days” James went on to say in a bothersome way and you sighed.

“For the hundredth time James, the answer is no” you told him again, this time calmly so that no one could hear you but, just as you stood there and pulled your hands away from James’s grip, Cillian approached you both.

“Do you mind finishing up here? Because, we are ready to shoot” Cillian told you while giving you the kind of look one would give you if they were annoyed or angered by your actions.

“Yes. Okay. I am coming Cillian” you told him calmly in response before pulling away from James. You remained polite whereas you were tempted to burst out in anger right then and there.

How dare him, talking to you like that you thought and, with that, you followed Cillian on to set with a deep sigh.

Despite your concerns and worries, you were determined to show him that his attitude towards you was frustrating while, yet, you had a job to do. You had to film a particular scene with him and this scene played in Thomas Shelby’s office.

Luckily for you, it was not an intimate scene but, instead, it was a scene with a lot of dialogue between his and your character and, even though you were usually rather good in remembering your lines, this time around you simply could not get it together.

You were so upset by Cillian’s attitude towards you and messed up several takes until, eventually, Cillian’s own frustration with you grew to the point at which he pulled you aside.

“What the fuck Y/N?” he said and you became more and more nervous now.

“I am sorry Cillian, but I am struggling a little with your presence right now. You have been avoiding me at all costs after…” you thus began to say but Cillian quickly cut you off.

“And I am sorry for that Y/N, but you need to pull yourself together. We have a full schedule today” Cillian said and you reluctantly nodded before resuming your position.

He was right. You had to act professional and, after giving it your best shot, it took another three takes and you finally managed to wrap it up and, since Natasha was with you, portraying Lizzie Stark, she later addressed the elephant in the room when you were getting changed.

***

“So, what happened between you and Cillian, huh?” was the first question she raised and your eyes immediately widened.

“What?” you blurted out in shock while watching her wipe off her make up. Luckily for you, you were on your own, getting changed back into your everyday clothes.

“I am not blind, silly. You are both acting like weirdos at the moment and Cillian doesn’t usually snap like this and neither do you. There was a lot of tension on set today” Natasha pointed out, causing you to swallow harshly.

“Nothing…it’s nothing…I think we both just had a bad day…we are both tired, you know…and…I don’t know Tash…” you stammered in response but she would not let up. She knew that you were lying to her.

“Tired, you say huh?” Natasha laughed and you nodded.

“Yes. It has been a long week” you told her but she shook her head.

“I swear, you are the fifth fucking woman to fall for him on set. I mean, how does he even do that? He is nice, but not that nice” Natasha joked before telling you a little story about his previous co-star who was interested in Cillian, but Cillian was not interested in her.

“What? I am not…oh god Tash…don’t be ridiculous” you stammered; red faced while loosing yourself in your act. She saw right through you.

“Oh common Y/N, the look on your face tells me that I am right. You’ve got a thing for Cillian and my guess is that something happened between you two, which is now causing some tension” Natasha determined and you immediately bit your lower lip with a great sense of nervousness.

“Natasha…” you then began to say after swallowing harshly, causing Natasha to laugh again.

“Am I right?” Natasha then asked, knowing very well that she was and, when you finally nodded reluctantly, she chuckled some more.

“You can’t tell anyone Tash” you told her, panicking slightly.

“Of course not” she reassured you before wanting to hear specifics. “Now tell me what happened” she said and so you did. You told her everything.

“We kissed a few days ago but he is…I don’t know…It was a mistake” you stammered.

“Did you think that it was a mistake or is this what he said?” Natasha wanted to know, seeing that, clearly, the difference in age might be an issue for him.

“This is what he said. He said that I am too young for him and us working together is going to be a real issue” you told her before elaborating some more and, when she came to hug you, this gave you the comfort you needed.

After a bit more talking about Cillian and his personal life and ideals, Natasha eventually changed the topic. The cast and crew were heading out for drinks that same night and she wanted to know whether you were going to join them.

“Are you coming for drinks?” she asked but, knowing that both James and Cillian would be there, you said “no”.

“I honestly just want some time to myself if that’s okay” you admitted and, being the friend she had become, she took no issue with your need for some alone time and privacy after what happened during the last two days.

***

Later that same day, at around 7 o’clock, the cast met at a local pub for drinks and, whilst not everyone was able to join in, at least twenty of them made it to the venue on time.

A space was specifically set aside for the crew and, when Natasha arrived there slightly late, she saw that Sophie, Cillian and James were talking about some books which Sophie had brought along for James.

“What is that? The Peaky Blinder’s Book Club?” Natasha asked jokingly and Sophie began to laugh.

“Something like that” she giggled before recommending a book to Natasha which Cillian and her had been debating about for the past half an hour. They were both literature nerds and clearly interpreted the book in different ways.

“Well, I have been reading this book, about a teacher and her student falling in love during the Civil War. It was quite fascinating. Cillian read it too, but his interpretation of the morale behind the story is quite different to mine” Sophie explained and Natasha was keen to hear more.

“What is the morale behind the story?” she thus asked Sophie before wanting to hear Cillian’s opinion on it.

“That sometimes you need to take risks in life in order to find true happiness” Sophie said, causing Cillian to roll his eyes in a cheeky kind of way.

“That is not what this book is about though” Cillian said before using this analogy for something else, namely his very own profession which is also when James jumped in and joined the conversation.

“It is like becoming an actor. You take risks to get what you want out of your career, right?” James said and this gave Sophie the opportunity to make her own observation.

“And love. Love is the same. Sometimes you need to take risk in order to find love” she told Cillian, but he shook his head.

“I think that love is a bit more complex than that. Sometimes you fall in love with the wrong person, someone you shouldn’t be falling in love with and this is when you need to listen to reason rather than taking risks” Cillian argued and, by this point, Natasha jumped in.

“Not necessarily” she said and Cillian gave her a look of confusion.

“Care to elaborate?” Cillian asked and Natasha ceased this opportunity to give him a very good example and possibly even a lesson for life.

“Well, you are either in love or you are not. If you are in love with a person who is not necessarily a conventional choice for you, then you may need to ask yourself this: are you willing to give it a go, simply in pursuit of happiness, or you going to play it safe and live your life without ever knowing whether this person could have been the one” Natasha argued, causing Cillian to think.

“The one?” he then asked, seeing that, perhaps, she has taken this a little far.

“The one for you. The one person you want to spend the rest of your life with…It is romantic, I know and maybe I am over exaggerating, but, just think about what you would get by playing it safe and ignoring your very own feelings?” Natasha explained but, of course, he had more questions for her.

“What would you get?” he asked curiously.

“You would get regret” Natasha said before elaborating again. “Regret over not knowing whether you missed out on a life of happiness and love” she went on, causing Cillian to sigh.

“Now that is very romantic indeed” he told her.

“I know, but gosh we have all been there, haven’t we?” Natasha said in response before giving him a wink, which is when he knew that this was a message for him. He knew that you had spoken to Natasha about what happened between you and that concerned and surprised him all at the same time.

“We have. Now would you excuse me please” he thus was quick to say and Sophie wondered where he was heading.

“Where are you going?” she asked while glaring at Cillian’s half full pint of Guinness.

“To bed. I have to get up at 4 o’clock tomorrow morning” he lied and, with that, the crew wished him a good night.

***

“You sly little shit. I see what you did there” Anthony said, laughing, as soon as Cillian had left the room and this comment itself raised some questions.

“So, you approve?” Natasha asked, leaving Sophie and James confused.  

“Yes and no” Anthony responded. His answer was short and sharp as always.

“Care to elaborate?” Natasha teased and Anthony had a few things to say.

“Well; let’s not tell Steven and the studio’s representatives about this if anything ever eventuates between those two but, fuck, their chemistry was good on screen. Until today. Today sucked and I never want to do thirteen takes on a dialogue scene like this ever again’ Anthony explained.

‘And the difference in age?’ Natasha asked.

‘What about it?’ Anthony wanted to know, not taking an issue with the age gap at all.

‘Well, there is twenty years between them. It is a lot…’ Natasha explained, knowing that this was Cillian’s main concern.

‘So? She seems mature enough’ Anthony said, not understanding the issue at all.

‘That is true. She is an old soul and pretty smart’ Natasha acknowledged.

‘And that is exactly what he likes about her’ Anthony told her, which is when Sophie and James jumped in.

‘Who are you talking about?’ they asked simultaneously and Anthony simply smiled.

‘Never you mind. Just two mutual friends of ours who need to resolve their differences and give in to the inevitable in order to make my life easier’ Anthony joked and both Sophie and James moved on to a different topic and this topic was your past relationship with James himself.

It was up for discussion next and, until that time, Anthony had not realised that you and James had been dating in the past. It came as a shock to him and he realised quickly why Natasha did not mention any names before.

James was still in love with you and poor Sophie was giving him hints and ideas about how he could win you back without knowing the real reasons behind your breakup with him. James had clearly omitted how he had just left you and chose his family and career over you. He had simply disappeared from your life and it was not until Natasha told him to let you go, that Sophie realised that you were done with him. It was over and James had to accept it.

To be continued…

Please comment and engage. I love getting comments and predictions pretty please!

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[morganski-19]

I Don’t Know Which Way’s Home

Chapter 1: The Reveal

ao3 link

September 1986

Julie slams the door shut when she comes home, she doesn’t mean to, most of the time. But today, she really does. And the hinge is already broken so what harm is it really going to do? So she ignores the comment her mom makes about it and does it again with her bedroom door, hearing the slam vibrate the walls of the trailer. 

She’s just so sick of it. It’s like every single class decides to do some stupid project that just makes her stand out from the beginning in front of kids who might not already know. Not like anyone does. Everyone knows everyone’s business in this town, and Julie’s family situation is no different. 

The problem today, was the beginning-year project her Spanish teacher assigned. A family tree, something simple to introduce yourself to the class and to see what you remembered from the last year. The only problem is, Julie is always missing half a tree. 

Her father has been a void in her life for its entirety. There’s no face to the name, and no name to even put a face to. Her mother won’t tell her anything, not even a peep. The most she knows is that he was a mistake her mom made for a few months that ended as soon as she became pregnant. Which translated into Julie’s mind that she was an accident. And with how their situation turned out, she couldn’t help but believe it was true. 

So when she’s reminded of the fact that her existence on this Earth is due to one of her mother’s flings that never lasts a year, she gets to slam a few doors. She gets to play the Iron Maiden tape she found on the ground one day at full volume without complaint. She doesn’t even like it that much, but it was free and loud enough to match the screaming that was going on inside her head. 

That’s the worst part, with how angry she can get about her family situation, she can never be mad at her mom for too long. Not after everything she’s done to make sure Julie had a good life. Not a perfect one, but one where they at least had a roof over their heads and weren’t living on the streets. 

It’s bad enough that her mom had to work two jobs just to get them by, she didn’t need to deal with all of Julie’s problems on top of that.

“Would you like to tell me why you’ve just permanently broken the front door, or am I supposed to guess?” Her mom says after coming into the room without knocking and turning the music down. 

Julie grunts from where her face is dug into the pillow. Hoping that it was enough to make her mom leave, but it never was. 

“Come on,” her mom gives her a soft shove. “You don’t get to barge into the house and break a door without explanation. What’s up?”

“What up is a stupid Spanish project,” Julie complains angrily as she rolls onto her back, glaring at the ceiling. “It’s a stupid family tree where I know I’ll be questioned on it in front of the whole class, again, on why I ‘failed to include my dad on the tree’. Like I would fucking leave him out on purpose.”

She feels the bed dip as her mom sits on the foot of it. “I’ll let that slide this time because you’re upset.”

“Yeah, I am. I just am so tired of explaining it in every single damn class I seem to have that he just left and I have no clue who he is. They don’t have a right to my life and I don’t need the pity looks they give me once they figure it out. And what’s worse is that everyone in the class already knows except for the teacher, so dumb Billy Johnson will start snickering or some shit, and then I’m the kid without a dad all over again.”

“Bullies really need to get some new material,” her mom jokes without hesitation.

Julie snorts. “Tell me about it. “ She gets softer, already feeling the anger start to dissipate. And when it does, all that is left is the gaping hole in her heart that she knows will never be filled. “I don’t even care that he’s not in my life anymore, I accepted that he wouldn’t be a long time ago. I just want to know who he is. Why I’m here. Why you won’t tell me anything about him.”

“I just don’t think-”

“Oh just save it mom, I’ve heard all the excuses. I’m not a little kid anymore who writes that her dad will want to know her in her Santa letters anymore. I know he doesn’t give a shit about me, I just want to know who. I deserve to have a name to not give a shit about either.”

Her bed rises again as her mom leaves, turning the music back to full volume and shutting the door softly behind her. Julie rolls back over, pulling her blankets over her head, and starts to feel like shit again. 

It’s not just the fact that she doesn’t have a present dad that bullies love to tease, there are more kids than you’d expect with only one parent. It’s that her mom wasn’t married when she had Julie that was the problem. Unwanted pregnancies are like drugs for small towns, they spread like wildfire. The second the neighbor saw that her mom had a significant bump, it was everywhere. And then the kids heard it from their parents at every school function. 

It’s all, “Oh poor Julie Lawson, her mother couldn’t keep a boyfriend long enough for her to have a real dad.” Like they have the right to comment on Julie’s family. Or her mom. No one does, not even her. 

. . . 

October 1986, Present Day

Steve walks in after his shift with two pizzas, a six-pack of beer, and Robin right behind him. It was Friday, which means that Robin, Eddie, and him shook off the kids for a night to watch a movie. Alone. They loved the kids but sometimes it was nice to have a night without chaos. Calming even. 

Eddie wasn’t coming over for a few more hours because of his band practice, so Steve stuck the pizzas in the oven so they stayed warm. Robin already makes herself at home, rummaging through the fridge to find something to drink and making a nest out of blankets in the living room when she does. Steve follows her, digging himself into the nest and putting something on the TV. 

An hour or so later, he hears a knock at the front door. Robin gives him a concerned look as he leaves the living room to open it. Eddie had a key so he just let himself in, and they weren’t expecting anyone else. And with their track record, it could go from random salesperson to world apocalypse pretty fast. 

When he opens the door, a girl he guesses is around Dustin’s age is there, nervously playing with her hands, a backpack loosely thrown over her shoulder. “Hi, sorry to bother you but, do the Harrington’s live here?” she asks shyly.

“Yes, I’m Steve. Who are you?” There is a familiarity to her face that he can’t quite place.  

“Steve, right, he had a son. Sorry, this week’s been weird. I’m uh, my name is Julie. Your dad kinda knew my mom.”

He must have met her at one of his dad’s work events, that has to be why she looks familiar. “Oh ok, did she have to drop something off here or something?”

“Well, kinda. But it’s not what you’re probably expecting.” She pauses looking unsure of what she is going to say next. “Can I- can I come it, you might want to sit down for what I have to say. It’s kind of shocking.”

“I’m not sure, I don’t really know you. Could you tell me who your mom is, maybe I can remember you then.”

She takes a deep breath. “When I said that my mom knew your dad, I didn’t mean from work. Well, I did mean from work but she hasn’t worked for him in over fifteen years, so I doubt you’d remember her. She was his secretary for a while, and they had a very,” she pauses again, looking around to see if anyone is there. “Intimate, relationship.”

The dots clicked immediately in his head, thoughts immediately started to run around about who this girl could really be. He thinks that her offer to sit down was probably necessary. “Yeah, why don’t you come in.”

“Ok.” She steps through the doorway, waiting for him to lead her through the house. 

He brings her to the kitchen, motioning for her to sit at the small table. Grabbing a few glasses, he fills them with water and brings them over, placing one in front of her. She thanks him, taking it and gulping it down with shaky hands. The more he looks at her, the more he can’t help but see more and more similarities, just ones that remind him of himself. 

“Who was it, Steve,” Robin asks, wandering into the kitchen. “Oh shit, hi.”

“Rob, this is Julie, her mom apparently knew my dad.” Steve makes a motion with his head to indicate how, hoping that she can read it right. 

Her eyes widen in shock. “Oh like, special knew. Like knew knew.”

“Yes,” Julie says weakly. “Yeah, they did.”

“Oh shit,” Robin takes a seat next to Steve, her hand immediately finding his. It brings comfort, reassurance that she’s there. He knew his dad was a piece of crap cheater, his mom certainly made it known during many of their screaming matches. But with the girl staring at him with the same eyes he sees every morning in the mirror, his brain can’t help but jump to the conclusion that she’s, something. And that just makes his chest tighten in anxiety.

“I, uh.” Julie starts, wringing her hand nervously again. “I don’t really know how to say this gently. But, when my mom worked for your dad, they had an affair. It didn’t last that long, but remember when I said my mom stopped working for him like fifteen years ago? It was actually seventeen because that’s when she figured out she was pregnant.”

Steve feels a lump forming in his throat as she nods, trying to take it all in. “With you?” he asks, not knowing how he is even speaking at all right now. Robin squeezes his hand.

Julie gives a small nod, looking down at the table. “Yeah.”

“And my dad is-” he can’t finish the sentence, but it’s answered by her sorry nod. “Holy shit.” 

He runs a hand through his hair, trying to wrap his head around everything. This girl, Julie, is his sister. Half-sister, whatever, it doesn’t matter. Robin breaks her contact with him and goes to rub his back instead. His head falls into his hands propped up on the table and he just focuses on breathing. 

“Steve, you ok?” Robin’s voice soothes him a little bit, but when your world just gets shattered, there’s not much that can be done to help completely. 

“I knew he cheated. I knew that. It’s why my mom followed him around on all his trips. But he- he had a kid, and just hid it.”

“I’m sorry. I know it’s a lot, I have proof if you want to see it.”

Steve looks at Robin, asking her what to do with his eyes. She shrugs, her way of saying that it couldn’t hurt. Probably is better that they have proof anyway, make sure this is legit. He nods, unable to say anything. 

“Could we see it? Just to double-check everything,” Robin asks for him. God, he’s so happy that she’s here. He can’t imagine doing this by himself

Julie ruffles around in her backpack, random clothes peeping out as she pulls out a file. She opens it, pulling out two pieces of paper before going in again and pulling out what looks like a school ID. “Here’s my birth certificate and the paternity test. And my ID with my picture on it, so you know it’s me.”

The first thing he sees is his father’s name on the test results, followed by the line saying his relation to Julie is undeniable. That he was undeniably the father. The birth certificate only has the signature of her mother and the doctor, but the father’s name is absent. He ditched them, probably made her mom prove that this kid was his, and then just paid them to shut them up. His mom would never know, he would never know, and they never had access to any of his records. 

Julie Rebecca Lawson, born January 28, 1970. He was three when she was born. He’s had a sibling this whole time, and he didn’t even know it. 

“Does your mom know you’re here?” Robin asks, softly. 

Julie’s face visibly falls as she rapidly blinks away some tears. “She- she died two weeks ago. Car accident.”

“I’m so sorry, Julie,” Robin reaches across to comfort her, but the hand she was going to grab gets pulled away. “Whoever is watching you then, do they know where you are?”

She sniffles. “I’ve been staying with a foster family while they find a permanent placement. They don’t really care where I am. My caseworkers were trying to find some family, but my grandparents are long gone and my mom’s sister is in no place to take in a kid. So they were looking on my dad’s side.” She says the word dad as if they don’t fit right in her mouth. 

“I didn’t come here looking for a place to say,” she continues. “Right before my mom passed, she finally told me about my dad. How he never wanted anything to do with me because he had a big reputation and another family. It was supposed to be a secret, but the more I thought about it, I couldn’t help but think that you had a right to know. And then since she-, since I needed a place to stay, it was only a matter of time before you found out. I knew he was out of town so I thought it might be better to say it myself. Now I’m not so sure that was such a great idea.”

“No,” Steve finally says. “I’m, I’m glad you told me. You’re right, we, me and my mom, had a right to know. So, thank you.” He turns to look at Robin, her face shifting when she sees the panic in his. “Rob, could I talk to you for a minute?”

She stands. “Yeah. We’ll be right back, ok Julie.” 

Julie says a soft reply as Robin leads Steve to the living room. “I don’t know what to do, Rob.”

“How could you? You just found out that your dad had another kid. With another woman. And then hid it from you. How are you supposed to cope with that information?”

“I don’t know. I have no clue what to do. But I can’t-. Shit Rob, I want to help her.”

“Steve, you don’t know her, at all. She just spawned on your doorstep not even an hour ago and just dropped the biggest bombshell on you since the, you know what. I get that you want to help her, I do. Shit, I do too. But I’m just asking that you take a step back and think about this.”

Steve crosses his arms, pulling his eyebrows together. The decision was pretty much made in his mind, but she was right. “What if she stays the night, we sleep on this and get to know her more tomorrow. Then we can go from there.”

“Ok,” she puts a hand on Steve’s arm. “That’s a good plan.” 

Robin steps forward, pulling him into a hug before they walk back into the kitchen. Julie looks back up at them, uncertainty filling her face. It reminds him so much of himself it sort of hurts. “Julie, you can stay the night, if you want to. That way tomorrow we can talk some more, and get to know each other, figure out what to do about this. But I can drive you back to the house you’re staying at if you’d like.”

“Could I stay here, I really don’t like it there.” The fear that coats her eyes with the mention only makes it worse. 

“Come on, I’ll show you the guest room.”

Julie stands, grabs her bag and follows after Steve. When he shows her to the room, she stands in it like like she knows she doesn’t belong. He can’t help but think it’s not the first time she’s felt like this, especially since he’s pretty sure she brought enough clothes for a few days in her bag. 

He tells her where the bathroom is, where his bedroom is if she needs anything. She nods silently. The similarities between them keep coming in waves. Sure they’re not like an exact match. But her eyes, her jawline, her hair, it’s ever so similar to his. If they were to walk down the street together, it would be clear that they were siblings. 

The fact that it’s true just keeps shocking him all over again. 

“You’re welcome to anything in the kitchen, and there’s plenty of supplies in the bathroom if you need any. I keep it all under the sink. And, don’t be afraid to ask for anything, ok?” He stands there awkwardly, not quite knowing what else to do. 

“Ok,” she replies softly, placing her bag on the bed and pulling out some things. 

When he shuts the door behind him, it finally hits. He practically runs back down the stairs to find Robin waiting in the living room, on the phone with someone. 

“Yeah, something came up and we can’t do movie night anymore. No nothing bad, yeah no he’s fine. I’m fine. We’re all good, just a migraine. Yep. I’ll have him call you tomorrow. No, you don’t need to do that. Ok, bye.” Robin turns to him when she hangs up the phone. “Eddie, thought it was pretty clear that movie night was canceled.”

“Yeah, no, it was. I-” the words get stuck in his throat. “I have a sister, Rob.”

Robin crosses over to him, pulling his fingers away from where they held his arms in a death grip. “I can’t imagine how you’re feeling right now.”

“Angry mostly. How could he keep this from us, from my mom? From me? Do you know how many times I wished for a sibling, only for me to have one all along and just not know about it? And then she goes through life knowing her dad didn’t want her. I can’t begin to imagine what that is like.”

“Pretty shitty probably. What do you really want to do about all of this Steve?”

He takes a deep breath. “I don’t know. I want to help her, get to know her. But I-I don’t know if I can do this.”

“She wasn’t asking you to fix everything. She just lost her mom, I think she just wants someone to lean on like that again.”

“But what if I can’t even do that?”

Robin gives him a soft look that he knows means he’s overthinking it all again. “Let’s go get some sleep ok. We’ll figure this out in the morning.”

They walk upstairs, passing the room that Julie is staying in on the way to his. He remembers being little and looking at the empty guest rooms in his house, wondering when people would come to fill them. Wishing that when they did, they’d stay for longer than a week. Maybe then he wouldn’t be alone anymore. 

When he was really young, he would sit in the rooms and pretend that it was other kids that filled them. Brothers and sisters that he got to play with for however long he wanted to. His nights would feel less empty and during the day he’d be less lonely. He’d be like every other kid on the playground with their siblings, pushing them on the swings and chasing them around the park. The house would be full of noise instead of deafening silence. 

But that day never came. The years went on and he kept getting older. His mom went on more and more trips and then just stopped calling. The only time his dad ever called was after the police told him that he’d thrown a party. He used to just mess up just to hear his dad’s voice. Because then maybe he could convince himself that his dad cared for him. If you're disappointed enough to yell, that has to mean you care about something. 

Most people say wait until you’re older and then you’ll understand like it’s some kind of mystery that everyone cheers when you solve it. Not knowing that some mysteries only crush the people around them. Steve Harrington spent most of his life alone and it wasn’t until he graduated and no one from his family showed up that he finally accepted why. 

As he looks back at the guest room, he can’t help but feel that part of himself get unearthed again. That sad little kid that begged for someone who he could grow up with. Knowing that was there across town all his life only makes him hurt all over again. 

The urge to call his dad right then and there is strong. To scream at him for hiding something that he wanted for so long. Yell at him for being a piece of shit to not just him, but to his mom, and to Julie. He was used to his dad, no one else deserved to be hurt like he was. 

. . . 

Julie lays in a bed that is bigger than one she’s owned in her entire life. Having one of this size would make it easier when she and her mom would share when her back was too sore after her double shifts to take the cot. The sheets are softer and clearly barely used, the fabric smells of fresh flowers. 

She’s almost angry at all of this. That one person could have so much and be so cruel. That Steve got more out of their dad than she ever did. But one of them was wanted, the other clearly wasn’t. 

The word still feels weird in her mind. Their dad. She didn’t even know the guy but she spent so long hating someone who was a dad to someone else. But by the lack of family pictures on the wall and the way Steve talked about him just briefly, it doesn’t look like he was much of a dad to Steve either. 

She wonders what it’s like to live in this giant house alone. The empty walls and rooms prepared for people but never filled. There were at least two living rooms in this house and a kitchen just made for a party. A house so perfect from the outside but so broken from within. 

Steve at least seemed nice, even after she broke the news. Hell, she’s still here, isn’t she? In her mind, she was preparing for the worst. To be kicked out on the curb right after even implying that her father was just that, her father. Because a businessman with a poster family could never do anything wrong, could never be a terrible person who would have a kid and just abandon it. 

But she was believed, and accepted. Allowed to stay the night in a house she always dreamed of living in with a family she didn’t even know existed. She just hopes that in the morning it all won’t go to shit like everything else in her life seems to. 

. . . 

September 1986

Julie hears her mom call out for dinner from the kitchen. As much as she’d like to still be angry, she can’t force herself to avoid her mom forever. For what it’s worth, her mom is all she has in the realm of family and a friend. There’s no one who knows her like she does, and it’d just be cruel to let the pain of the past dwell any longer. 

Except this isn’t a pain of the past, not for Julie. Almost daily she’s reminded that there’s someone out there who doesn’t care enough to know her, and that person is half the reason she exists. It seemed like everyone else in this town knew who their father was, even if they weren’t around, except for her. 

But she can’t help but think about what her mom went through. How raising a kid on her own had to be, especially in a town like this. Someone she obviously cared about just dropping her after a positive test and leaving her high and dry. Life was hard, but she managed, somehow. Julie’s not so sure she would have in her position. 

“I want to talk to you about something,” her mother starts once the table is cleared. She goes to sit back at the table, placing a folder on top of it. “What you said earlier, you’re right. You have a right to know who your father is, whether he’s in your life or not.”

Julie sits across from her mom. “I was just angry before, you really don’t have to tell me if you don’t want to.” 

It’s a lie and they both know it. 

“No, you need to know. There’s going to be a point in the future where you’ll need to know certain things, medical history and such. And there might be a day when his family finds out about you and comes asking for questions.”

“His family,” she says shocked. 

Her mom nods. “A wife and a son. He had both of them already when we were together.”

Julie’s entire world shifts. “What?”

“A year before you were born, I worked as a secretary for Richard Harrington in his business, well his dad’s business at the time. We entered an, inappropriate relationship, which ended up in you.”

“Inappropriate’s one way to say it,” she jokes under her breath. “He’s a big deal in town, Mom, his whole family is.”

Her mom nods. “It was risky and stupid and I never should have done it. But back then, he was good at hiding what a terrible person he was behind his looks and his charm. It wasn’t until you got to know him and got on his bad side that things went south.”

“So, when you got pregnant with me?”

“It went south, fast. I told him, he wanted you gone but I couldn’t go through with it. So instead we came up with a deal. I prove you were his with a paternity test, and he gives me a monthly payment to shut me up. It wasn’t a lot, clearly, but it would be enough to pay off the trailer in a few years and make sure we had money for bills.”

“I’m surprised that he gave you anything at all.” It really couldn’t have been that much if her mom had to work two jobs just in order to scrape by. 

“The rich will do anything to keep a secret, including bribery. Everything you could ever need to know about him is in this file. With a copy of your birth certificate and the paternity test. Just so you have it. I’m sorry I kept it from you for so long.”

She looks at the file in her hand. It’s still pretty empty, but it has just enough. “I can see why you did. It’d be worse for you for a kid to accidentally tell everyone their dad is a Harrington.”

“It’d be bad.” Her mom clears her throat, looking down at her hands. “I also didn’t want you to think differently of me. I slept with a married man after all, for a year. That’s a pretty shitty thing to do to someone, even if you don’t know them.”

“Yeah, it is.” Julie would be lying if she said it didn’t come as a shock, that her mom would do that. All this time she thought that her dad was some drugged-up guy that she hooked up with for a month or two before they stole all her cash and ran off. That’s who her boyfriends were in the past few years, so it wouldn’t have been a surprise. But a married man, one with a kid, that’s a new one.  “Do you regret it? Sleeping with him.”

“All the time, but then I’d never have you.” She reaches her hands across the table and cups them around Julie’s. “You’re my life, Jules. I love you more than anything, and I wouldn’t change a thing if it meant never having you.” 

Julie puts a smile on her face. “Love you too, Mom. And thank you for telling me about this. Now I have a name to not give a shit about.”

“Yeah, now you do.”

Her mom gives her one last smile before going to the living room and setting up her cot. Julie takes the file and heads to her room, shutting the door softly behind her. 

She doesn’t know how to describe what she’s feeling. Like a weight has been lifted off of her but a new feeling of dread came to replace it. The name of the person who she’s hated for so long is in her hands, and she doesn’t know what to do with it other than hate him more. He had a wife, and a kid, a young kid, and he still went and had an affair. 

When she lies in her bed, waiting for sleep to come, all she can picture is the face of the man who ruined not only one life but three. And while her mom isn’t blameless, she can’t help but think that there is more to the story than her just willingly sleeping with him. She imagines taking her fist and hitting him straight in his smug face. Once for her mom, and once for her. 

Chapter 2

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