#i am missing him so bad rn.
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if we're asking for nanami thoughts then i just wanna know how he'd act if you came home llate from a mission or work jwjbsbs i need this rn
.𖥔 ݁ ˖ SAFE & SOUND — nanami kento
contents: gn!reader 🤍 heheh i didn't mean to write a whole little drabble but i cannot resist something like this ! sfw & a little bit of angst for kicks and giggles — 700
given the nature of being a sorcerer, nanami can't help but get worried when you're running late. he watches the clock tick, minute after minute passing while you still haven't answered his calls.
he's nervous, of course he's nervous. but he doesn't want to be annoying. he knows you can take care of yourself, knows you're strong and capable; and he doesn't want to seem like an overprotective boyfriend. even if it terrifies him that he can't get a hold of you.
instead, he'll just wait for your response, pace the apartment with his phone in his hands and pretend like everything's fine.
kento tries to stay calm. but 45 minutes have passed, and you still haven't answered him.
he's not usually an anxious man, not usually one to let his emotions get the best of him; but his palms are sweaty, his hands shaky, and he can't remember the last time he's felt so on edge.
the dinner he made earlier is already cold, even his own, which he can't bring himself to eat now.
kento's beginning to wonder if he needs to start making calls. there's no need for him to overreact, not when he hasn't been informed that your mission went awry. perhaps satoru knows where you are, shoko, one of the students.
or maybe not. if he doesn't get an answer soon, he'll consider going out after you.
he waits for ten more minutes. the seconds drag on and on.
kento's finger hovers over gojo's contact name. he contemplates.
but the door unlocks just before he can click it, and you're stepping through the threshold, shaking off your coat like nothing's wrong. your hair's a little wind-blown, but otherwise, kento can't spot anything off about you. there's no noticeable wounds, no pain in your expression other than exhaustion.
he's to you in just a few steps, dropping his phone back on the table to take you into his arms. you don't even have time to take your shoes off before he's crushing you to his chest, a heavy hand on the back of your head, pressing it near his heart.
you can hear it hammering in his ribcage, an erratic rhythm that makes guilt flower in your stomach. already, you feel so horrible, you'd been in such a rush to get home.
"kento," you say softly, apologetically, and he swallows, kissing your forehead. he's trying to pretend like nothing's wrong, like he wasn't just scared out of his mind, but you can see right through it. "i didn't mean to worry you."
it doesn't take a genius to realize he'd been afraid, not with the way he can't take his hands off of you.
he breathes, kisses the top of your head. "you didn't call me back."
"my phone died. i didn't get the chance to." you feel so, so awful, especially since you know that this has always been his greatest fear.
time after time, he's lived while other sorcerers die, and you know, even if he doesn't tell you, that he's just waiting for it to be you next. for it to be you lying on that steely table, leaving kento all alone, hardened to the world, perhaps forever.
"i'm so, so sorry, kento," you say, pressing your hand against his chest, feeling as the rhythm of his heartbeat dies down. "i was going to call you back as soon as i finished the mission, and then–"
"shh," he squeezes you tight once more, reassuring, "it's okay. it's not your fault, sweetheart."
"i should've been more prepared." your features pinch together. "i should've charged my phone before i left."
"it's okay," kento says again, and you're not sure when you became the one that's being consoled. "the important thing is that you're home safe and sound."
you swallow down your guilt, kissing his collarbone, the closest part of him that you can get your lips on. "i don't like worrying you."
finally, kento pulls away. you can see the distress that's slowly fading, the way his hands stop their nervous shaking. he brushes a piece of hair away from your face, smiling softly. the expression is almost sad, but there's so much love there, so much affection that you ache.
"well there's nothing we can do about that," he says, kissing your forehead before slinging an arm over your shoulder. "i worry about you all the time."
you open your mouth to argue, but it dies quickly. your rebuttal is futile, hypocritical. you worry about him just as much.
"i'm going to be just fine," you tell him as he leads you to the kitchen, where the cold food is sitting there, waiting. "i'll always make it home to you."
he smiles, and squeezes your hand once. "i sure hope so."
#i am missing him so bad rn.#yearning fr#nanami fluff#nanami angst#nanami x reader#nanami kento x reader#xoxo rylie 💌 ୧⋆ ˚。⋆#໒꒱ rylie's angels#xoxo rylie 💌 ⋆ ˚。⋆
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CHAPTER TWO | The Scientific Method
FORGETTABLE-AU (page 73-77)
* His brother is annoying.
[BEGINNING] [PREVIOUS] [CONTINUE]
#alahskwj FINALLY#okay so I HAD TO DO HALF OF THE COLORING AND SOME LINEART ON MY TABLET AND IT WAS SOO ANNOYING#BUT!!! I FINISHED!#akshwkdjwj#SAANSS#I missed making him talk with lowercase#It feels like a crime making him use proper capitalization sometimes😔😔😔😔#just wanna clarify#Flowey knows Sans but Sans doesn't know Flowey#Flowey used to reset a LOT when it came to him so#in Sans memory he only know Flowey from that one time he tried to steal their souls and from what Papyrus has told him#He doesn't really trust the guy but#He does trust Papyrus#Flowey is so funny#He is SO bad at not sounding suspicious LMAOO#dumb#I don't know how Sans is using sunglasses either🤩#he's trying to enjoy the sun#he spends a lot of time there lol#QKWGWKDJ#So glad the comic is back but I am SO BUSY rn#I think the next pages might come late too.....#forgettable-au#forgettable-au-comic#undertale au#undertale#sans#flowey#sans undertale#undertale comic
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i want to play with satoru's hair and give him a head massage and i want to trace his scars and kiss his temple i want him to fall asleep on top of me i want him to feel safe and protected and loved i wanna cradle him and keep him in my arms i just want to take care of him:(((((((
#gonna buy a three sizes too big hoodie and wear it for a while and then give it to him so it smells like me#and then i wanna see him wear it#i wanna baby him so bad#my big kitty cat:(((((((#i miss him so much i am feeling very sappy rn#i love him#i love him i love him i love him#angel boy#mickey is daydreaming
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Yall Vladimir and Leblanc are basically just that one dramatic yet hot goth couple who love each other and compared to the situationships who are trying to keep it together while the world is ending.....they are just chilling happy and healthy, while they do crimes and casually destroy ppls lives like it's another Tuesday.
#“Almost all of Piltover died or got destroyed bc of our plans.....lets aim higher”#they dont just match each others their freaks they transcend it#Leblanc: Y'know what would be funny....#Vladimir: Say no more#“it's just a joke bro” *Piltover and Zaun praying for their downfall rn*#cant wait to see these two divas#welcome to noxus#arcane noxus#arcane vladimir#arcane leblanc#do I dislike them bc they're bad?....yes but just like Silco.....they do it real damn good.#Silco was just that good *sighs* I miss him#*sighs* whose life am I gonna ruin today? - Leblanc probably#they are so camp coded and I love it
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all my pdh s2 doodles i need u guys to keep in mind i didnt know All That was gonna happen😭😭😭😭
#I FEEL SO BAD BRO HOW THE HELL WAS I SUPPOSED TO PREDICT THAT CRAZY ASS DATE#aphmau#phoenix drop high#aphverse#aphmau mystreet#ein mystreet#aphmau pdh#kai pdh#im not tagging everyone thats too much just jnow i love them all#SORRY KAIS HAIR LOOKS DIFFERENT IN EVERU DRAWING I COULDNT FIGURE OUY HOW I WANTED JT TO LOOK☹️☹️#U guys should have seen my face when ein was revealed to be Evil bro Jaw Dropped i was mad as hell like WTF WAS THAT#KAI ESPECIALLY THAT HURT SO BADD BRO I LOVED KAI I EVEN MADR HIM A FIGURE SKATER LIKE ME Like that was literally my Friend😭#ive geniuenly Ranted and written so much about this in my notes app i HATE how kai was treated at the end there Bro idgaf THEY LITERALLY#CHANGED HIS ENTIRE PEROSNALITY ALLL BHIS VALUES Mr ''learning about other people is a wonderful thing''Jessicaaa😞😞#I THOIGHT THAT WAS INTENTIONAL TO LIKE CONTRAST THE PREVIOUS SEASON LIKE WOW here's a guy that geniuenly Cares too ESPECIALLY SINCE#HE Gives her examples of things she's said in the past things specific to HER that he Knows in his MIND like a GOOD FRIEND!!!#IN THE SAME EPISODE!!!!!! AM I CRAZY LIKE ACTUALLY WHAT AM I MISSING HERE#Guys Om sorry i know he comes back in a later season of mystreet or whatever and is Weird but like im only on love lovenparadise rn i cant#deal wirh Whatever happens thats Seperate Ok im a Pdh defender exclusively#i have so many more thoughts but like im lowkey Done these have been in my gallery for so long i was too scared to post after finishing the#season but like whateverrrr sorry for rambling goodbue❤️#awesome
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anyway yeah fr i miss ordo theoritas. i miss the theory crafting i miss the hugeass meetings before/after Big Lore Event to brief/debrief everyone involved i miss the chaos and confusion and laughter and teamwork. i miss the cellbit, bad, and phil (key-keepers my beloveds) being the heads of the ordo working together to untangle the mysteries to the island. they were hardly ever on at the same time bc schedules and time zones (WAILS) but in my head they had so many late nights down in the evidence rooms like this
just. yeah. yeahh.
#qsmp#ordo theoritas#qsmp philza#qsmp cellbit#qsmp badboyhalo#i might have a fic idea but rn it’s just archivists bc they live in my head rent free#also im not too comfortable writing bad bc (1) i don’t watch him as much and (2) his lore is like?? so complicated??#as an outside viewer its pretty intimidating lol#it’s the vibe of late night working w your friends on a project/lab/whatever slowly losing your minds tying to figure it out#it’s 2:30 am you’ve been talking in circles the theories are getting more out there but ya don’t rly care bc hey it’s Something#and then someone says smthn that’s just like Woah. wait Actually?? and it kicks you all back into gear to get you chugging along again#anyway i miss them i go sleepies now gnnnn#dont mind me im just rambling#god so much for me going to bed at a decent hour lmao
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Mickbell Tomas it seems I’ve grown quite fond of you you come to me as a long lost friend whom I once picked apples with in papa’s orchard
I headcanon his nose scrunches up and he bites his tongue sometimes when he’s reallyyy laughing… And he’ll snort sometimes of course. Free serotonin. Yk I connected the dots recently that since my twst 2nd top fave is Ruggie it was truly only a matter of time before the Mickbell brainrot got to me. Little "shhh-shh-shhh" laughs please and thank you
#Process pics/alt in reblog#Just a thing i did to unwind and practice my painting style rendering. I loooove painting skin my favorite thing to do. Oh the hair……? Um….#I’m still working on my mickbell omodoki plush btw and omfg his hair color is so hard to find an accurate fabric for#Mickbell Tomas#Dungeon meshi#The hands here are really emblematic of how inconsistent I am in style both lineart and rendering ueghhh… but both look fun……#Don’t mind his pose. I wanted it to be like lightly grabbing his stomach from laughter and a hand going to his mouth in ~disbelief#But it kinda just looks like nothing lol. He has his beautiful beautiful sneer which is most important tho#Still dunno how to handle lips while rendering tbh….. trust the process tho. The face was took quite a while and reworking my approach#after my third attempt of his skin making him look like a buttered smoothened baby lmaoo#Should have added more lineart to the hair… gnawing on my handkerchief. Anyways this was always meant to be loose free me#I really do prefer the noticeable opaque splotches shading painting style as opposed to just smooth and gradients is what i confirmed#I should paint a portrait traditionally i want to sooo bad rn. I missed many character bdays….#Omg right. Inktober right. I am definitely on schedule for inktober yes#Dunmeshi fanart
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did anything actually end up happening with theo's fake parents ever? that was such an attention-grabbing scene that teased so much with theo and then nothing came of it at all. like i know it was to signal that he's not a good guy and a liar, but there are many ways to do that without hiring two new actors. makes me wonder what the original plan was for that storyline.
#teen wolf#theo raeken#miss him so bad rn#maybe i should rewatch#thats funny#i never make it more than like 4 episodes on a rewatch#i'm actualy super out of the loop on tw so maybe this is known and i just am living under a rock
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I just started my period after being sick for like a week and I’m so horribly exhausted and my Spotify had the AUDACITY to play Screensaver now I must kill myself
#sorry yall I#I am doing so bad rn#I need to eat something#I really really miss Wilbur#confession I was the most parasocial about him#also the whole thing with him happened right after I got out of a mental hospital#like I’m not#idek#he makes me so ill
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im someone who stuggles not to let his curiosity and drive sometimes (often) cross over into an overwhelming and maladaptive need for answers, for explanation, for certainty. someone who, historically, sees making art as a primarily intellectual exercise. this is not inherently a bad thing, we all have our temperaments and this kind of attention can be a strength. but, you know that artist who makes a painting, and then only wants to show it while explaining it to you? thats me, sometimes, more often than i like. every story i used to write had another hundred page document behind it, explicating every single choice -- often i would simply read that, instead of ever actually write the story itself. the explanation precedes everything. the answers alone are the experience.
david lynch's work and philosphy has been and is a vital foothold in my efforts to learn to love the questions as our breath. learn to appreciate intuition and dreams, trust them instead of fear them. learn to see that the world has so much confusing, uncertain, strange beauty, that can be terrifying but turns sublime when you cease rejecting it from fear. when you embrace the unknown and dont try to immediately & anxiously explicate it all away, a whole new world opens up to you. that you need the darkness in order to dream, and you need dreams in order to live fully immersed in what the world has to offer. a foothold in learning to be okay with abstraction, with imperfect subjectivity, with uncertainty. to know it is not anthitetical to truth and meaning. know that to skillfully make ideas come alive into a work *is* to rationally pin them down, but that you cannot lose sight of the intuition they were born as.
his artistic intuition reminds me of what i need to have -- the trust and humility for experiencing the inexplicable and understanding that to be enough. a devotion to ideas and their realisation. a balancing force, for my endless inquiry -- to not forget to live the question in my the search for an answer. to allow some thing to go without clear or universal explanation, allow for some things to remain unresolved, allow for others to have that be their resolution. it's why his work equal parts captivates me and disturbs me -- i am very bad at this. but feel in my heart a need to get better at it. to be a better artist, a better thinker, a better searcher, a better person. you need to feel it, intuitively, quiet your endless noisy need for an answer and simply let it fill you up, let it resonate intuitively, and find in that how life makes sense to you and you alone. mediation, mindfulness, humility to sit with abstraction without trying to pin it down. more and more i try to understand this. some things don't need to make perfect sense. some things dont need answers, or their answers are not the point. some things dont need anything but to be experienced as they enter you -- like dreams do. that can lead you to the answer, and that can also be enough in itself. that can be just an intrinsic value in being alive to experience it. and so often, it is all in conversation with the search for joy. it's why he feels so captivating, so unique, so tremendously alive. why people use the word "visionary" when talking about him. because he knew how to use his medium in all the potential he could see, so that it let you live in the strangeness and questions. he understood them as sublime, he understood them as enough, he understood them as a joy. he understood them as beautiful. and his memory will remind me to do the same; always to seek the space to dream.
#(in dreams / oh in dreams / the snake will find its tail)#i am! a guy! who likes! answers!!#someone who resolves his fear of monsters in the closet by picking up a flashlight and brazenly throwing open the door!!#but at my worst i am also extremely anxious and thus avoidant!!#so i will resolve my fear of monsters in the closet by opening the doors wide and then simply pretending to see whats inside#searching for answers without the bravery to sit with questions#this makes me worse!! it makes me worse!!!!#thank you david lynch for reminding me over and over again that the way to stop being afraid of the dark#is to not stop at all#but instead embrace that disquiet. open the closet door wide as it will get. turn off the flashlight#and simply sit in front of it#observing -- simply observing -- whatever shapes emerge#letting them fill you up#and then doing something with them#also... man#lynch is one of the few things my mom and i almost completely agree on and could connect through#despite everything i feel like she gets this necessity for humility and curiosity and quieting down your need for answers#and not to get overshary on the tumblrs but it is a source of friction at times#because of my me and like. the abuse. i dont want someone whose failure of self knowledge gave me cptsd to tell me i should *think less*#but idk it's precious that through lynch we find a common ground in which to agree about it#i think i get what she was trying to tell me a little better now. or maybe what she would've liked to be trying to tell me#idk tldr i had a violent childhood where nothing made sense and everything was scary so now i struggle not to be desperate for#certainty and knowledge as protection. and the way i always found that was through art and philosophy so. yeah.#lynchs work helps me like... calm down a bit about that and do it better#to learn to love the strange and the confusing and the disquieting not see it always as a threat#to sit in the dark and see it for what it is. painful and beautiful. tender and hard. its deeply relieving. its good#hole in the world dude im gonna miss him really bad all i can feel rn is sadness gratitude and joy#forever in dreams#david lynch#mine
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My New Years goal/hopes and dreams: have a baby or a baby on the way by the end of the year ❤️
#personal#i am so ready#bf is not#we are still fresh into the relationship (~3 mos) but not BRAND new#so not ready for that conversation yet#weve had the “do you want (more) kids?” talk but not the “do you want to have a kid with me?” talk#but i already know my answer#i may sound stupid#buy yall he is so GOOD#good to me#a good son#a good dad#a good person#good everything#hes gotta get his custody situation straightened out with his ex#there is no custody arrangement rn#no court proceedings or written arrangements have happened#his kids live 5h away and his visits with them are hard on him#the anxiety of the lead-up and then missing the girls bad afterward AND the exhaustion of the trip#and then hes distant from me for several days afterward but thats a conversation for a different post#😂#long story short in tags#im ready to be a mama and start my family
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:(
#nobody read these tags I'm very vulnerable rn#oh I am SO about to start my period huh? cringe ass emotional ass night 👎#feeling a lot of pizzazz (jazz x peppino) feelings rn#I should not have made that post earlier. reminded me of them :(#I'm sorry I took anton from you. I'm sorry we both kind of left you behind for one another. I'm sorry#I know these are silly little fictional guys in my brain. I know they are not real and do not care.#but I am emotional rn and thinking about the things I'm thinking about is not helping at all#do you think he misses me#do you think it's hard for him#:(((#:((((#god I'm feeling SO guilty#they're not real they're not real#being ficto and autistic is biting me in the ass HARD rn#no bad blood. I said it myself I just need to remember#but I am so vividly imagining a ''I want you back. just for a night.'' scenario that is fucking me up more than it should be#1000% a ''it's late and some hormonal shit is happening'' combo that I will be over when I wake up#but goddddd... :(((#delete later maybe#idk yet. idk.#I gotta go#gotta sleep so I don't shed more stupid lame tears over some crap I made up
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..
#I haven’t been well#an understatement to say the least#I have isolated myself from all my friends. bitten my tongue where there are indents more apparent than tastebuds.#I work all the time and when I’m not working I drink#I miss my friends#I miss being a little kid#i wish I could disappear man#my birthday is coming up and it’s scary#I’m having a bday party but day of my bday I’m gonna spend it alone#bc I know my expectations from others would be too high and it would be a let down#so it’s best I spend the day of it doing things I wanna do on my own time and having fun and dressing cute#so that’s the plan#but idk I’m not well#like bo burnham said.#I am not. well#I think he said that idk I may be lying cuz I’m drunk lol#I want to be cared for the way I care#things have been so bad.#haven’t seen my therapist in almost a year bc I can’t afford him rn#ab me#this is mine#sick#tw
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I FUCKED UP !
#RUINED MY PLAYTHROUGH. SCREAMING CRYING.#do i reload a save. no. no no no. cannot. must continue forward.#for context. i was worried so i looked it up and i missed a key flirt option with lucanis so that romance is out the window. fuck.#i have another rook on the wings rn thats on level six but i KNOW he and taash are perfect for eachother so i cant change that#am i... gonna make a whole new character for this man......... maybe so.#its fine its fine its fine. I'll continue this playthrough with harding like originally intended and i'll be just fine.#i DO love harding. i was just completely blindsided by lucanis.#thats why i missed the romance thing. bc i genuinely didn't think i would want to romance him this bad#da#veilguard#veilguard spoilers
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SORRY NOT SORRY
I understand the reasoning behind Hunter's doubts...but come on!! DAMN IT HUNTER! NOT AGAIN!
#spoilers the bad batch#the bad batch season 2 spoilers#the bad batch spoilers#tbb s2 spoilers#tbb spoilers#tbbs2spoilers#spoilers#sw tbb s2 spoilers#bad batch crosshair#the bad batch crosshair#crosshair bad batch#tbb crosshair#crosshair#I fear that Hemlock is going to do something really bad to Crosshair and It's going to be too late to save him. A point of no return.#I don't know if I'm missing something about the relationship between Hunter and Crosshair. Was Crosshair really that bad?#and of course I know the context behind Hunter's stance Cross tried to kill them. The chip etc. He made his decision#I think I need more context of why their relationship is like that and not what they showed us before order 66.#Hunter must known him after all those years he must known if Cross was lying#I am so confused rn. Like Hunt...babe you have to know if he is lying.#It is for your own good and for your precious child good. It's for Omega's sake! You have to know!#It's a meme don't get too serious about this#I love Hunter and I know he is doing what it's the best for the team
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not in a good mood rn..... god give me the strength to not cry in front of the director when we chat privately
#.txt#i do not like one of the actors. partly just right now and partly in general.#they cannot learn their lines he paraphrases fucking everything#also very chatty when we're trying to focus the cast#and said some stupid shit last night about how my asm was the real stage manager in his heart which The Production Stage Manager#does not like to hear.#it was late and sort of related to a bit i don't think it was malicious but i don't have the energy to take it charitably#also they made a seventy slide forty-five minute presentation for powerpoint night and god knows how much time that was#that they could have spent actually. you know. learning their lines.#and they are friends with my asm who kind of sucks...#hes better than the last one i had who sucks. but still#not going into that one rn so i don't make myself more annoyed but let it be known he is chronically late bad at being on book and misses#his cues#but i gotta train this kid in because i am graduating and there aren't enough sms to take up the mantly#mantle#which probably means i have to bring him onto the musical too :/ i want to have fun!#long story short it is past my bedtime i am overworked and this is my blog so enjoy <3#AND i found out i didn't get a part in a short film by hearing cast members chattering excitedly about their emails getting parts#which ok i am an adult i can deal but sucks to hear that way
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