#i am culturally christian btw just saying okay

[lilyliveredlittlerichboy]

Lmao.

I am a science graduate and science enjoyer and have never more than dabbled in any sort of organised religion.

Anon, I recommend reading "A Brief History of Time" by Stephen Hawking. In which he explains quite clearly that if the charge of an electron was off by a miniscule percentage, life as we know it wouldn't be possible at all. If gravity was off by a little bit - stars wouldn't be possible, even. Our existence depends on the very laws of physics being calibrated extremely carefully to allow atoms, molecules to form, to allow stars and planets and any form of life.

That's barely the tip of the iceberg though. Do you know how many things can go wrong in human embryological development? The answer, you may have guessed, is A Lot. a metric fuck tonne of simple things that can go wrong very easily and suddenly your embryo is no longer viable, it dies and gets aborted by the body before the person even knows they're pregnant. This happens more often than you think. It's practically a miracle that humans ever make it from a sperm and egg to a fully developed person, and yet it happens all the time, to the point where we have so many billions of us.

Like yeah evolution is a thing and astrophysics is a thing but if you think they "prove" anything then you simply just don't know how science and research works. Science exists to describe the world around us, first and foremost. To make observations and identify causal relationships. To speculate about what might be happening, to create working theories, and to test those theories and abandon them if they don't work anymore at describing the world around us, to create new theories that describe the world a bit better.

Science doesn't disprove the existence of a god. In fact, science has brought me closer to believing in god than any religion ever has. God isn't just "sky daddy" god is defined different by every person and every culture and it could just be a force that sets the laws of physics so life is viable, and makes a million billion coincidences happen so that creatures can survive on this earth (and elsewhere). I saw it said once that "God's job isn't to make life easy, it is to make life possible." And that really resonated with me.

Anon, please broaden your definition of God and also Science and do some learning. It'll do you good.

Science can 100% disprove God. It can even disprove that something approximating a good could exist or even be possible. Claiming that God can exist, or any magical mythical deity, is literally impossible. Every facet of science and demonstrable reality disproves yours and anyone else's belief in a mythical magical sky father who is somehow omnipotent and omnipresent, but has never done anything.

Sad that your identity is so mixed up with literal desert fairytales.

hmmmmmm i wonder who this is

[moonmoonthecrabking]

who will pray for you when your body's gone?

aka a post that was going to be two and then i thought more and went FUCK

because, okay, when i first heard this line, i thought it was grace's internal proof of her superior christianity. while what she values primarily is her chastity (vibrating with anger at evangelical purity culture btw), she absolutely has a superiority complex around her faith. she doesn't swear, she's a christian unlike shapiro, a catholic (this also really pisses me off when i come across it irl, and believe me i have). so, now that either she wasn't following God anymore (who was left to pray for him), or she was the Real Christian in hatchetfield who kills jason (who would pray for him if she wouldn't), he was alone.

and then i realised - grace doesn't pray that much onstage. this makes logical sense, it'd only really work in a monologue or soliloquy (think charlotte in tgwdlm before you tied up my heart). because, you know, you're talking to someone who not only doesn't talk back but also isn't onstage. in a physical form. you know what i mean.

the two instances grace has of talking to God in any way (which is praying, feel free to use the terms interchangeably), or one and a half, is when the chasitys say amen after grace (food prayer, not the character) (i'm counting this as the half because normally one person says grace, we don't know if it was mark or karen instead, but i mean you're praying *with* someone even if you don't say anything. i'm also counting as half because we don't see the prayer, just the end, because it's a scene transition). the other is "and now he's leaving me out to dry! DO SOMETHING YOU SON OF A BITCH!" now, as a christian and therefore the authority on all christian matters (this is a joke please take it as one), it's not considered the best thing to call God a son of a b-word, and i personally haven't done so. however, this can be thought of - and stick with me here - as a slightly excessive form of a lament. i personally interpret lament to be less "God, you bitch" and more "hey, God, what the fuck" (i have said that one). laments are found in the Bible, (there's a book called lamentations, and iirc there are some in psalms). however, she regrets this prayer because, look, i'm not going to act as all-knowing, but lament is complex. basically, grace could internally see this as her rebelling against religion in the strict bounds that were set out for her, or maybe trying to command God? i'd personally say accidentally killing your classmate and excusing it by saying it was God's plan is a worse representation of God than saying "do something", but i'm bisexual and will be dead at some point, so who am i to judge?

after having this realisation, i realised that grace doesn't actually talk to the lib either. the closest she gets is saying their names in the summoning, but steph is the only one who actually talks to them. grace looks like she's in physical pain (which i have my reasons behind thinking, but they're more or less irrelevant). even when she's devouring the souls of the pervs, she never actually says "thanks to my boys, the lib". she doesn't say grace while metaphysical eating, for shame. you should be thankful for your food, chasity

and like. it's interesting, right? i don't have any major conclusions on this for the moment, but i'm curious if anyone here as any thoughts on this?

[aviancataclysm]

regarding GD levels and misrepresentation of Chinese dragons

so. have you seen this level yet?

okay now dont get me wrong, the level looks VERY GOOD and i rly like it. but this brings to mind an issue that ive observed for a while in the GD community (and western media in general) (DISCLAIMER AGAIN that i do not have anything against this level and its creator)

it is that dragons are NOT obstacles/evil/menaces in chinese culture, which is what this lvl is obviously themed around

the difference lies in that most depictions of european dragons were symbols of power in the aggressive/menacing/evil way; they were tyranny and greed and destruction

and even though dragons are epic in modern society, these undertones are still prevalent because it just went from what we hate abt dragons to what we love abt dragons

but chinese dragons are NOT that. they are wealth, they are peace and power and symbol of holiness and kingship they bring rain that allows food to grow, they calm the lakes and oceans so sailors can pass; they will NOT bring misfortune unless one angers them, just like gods because they were gods

while it is true that 1. dragons are all fictional so you can do whatever with them 2. there are moral alignment variations within european dragons (eg. welsh dragon vs dragons in christianity)

chinese dragons are like . exclusive one of their kind bc its been associated with said culture (and had its rules set) since like 2070 BC (yes ancient china dates that far back and that's not even near the beginning of it)

so you cant rly make a whole level with blatant effort to resemble chinese culture, get the dragons symbolism wrong and then go "but theyre fictional so i do whatever i want,," -> bc ur associating with something already established

if you want to do whatever then you need to make distinctions in design and stuff to make it FEEL like it's your own thing.

so yeah theres that ty for coming to my ted talk. 掰囉大家

btw if youre wondering why i can talk about this. i am a native chinese speaker living in a country right next to china with its cultural roots very deeply intertwined (one could say they're the same but in different nations). we still have chinese history in our curriculum and many aspects of our traditions came from the time we were under qing dynasty rule

[ayzrules]

✶ 𝐇𝐗𝐇 𝐓𝐇𝐄𝐌𝐄𝐒: 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 & 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐈𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒, 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇 & 𝐃𝐀𝐌𝐍𝐀𝐓𝐈𝐎𝐍   Long story short, I have been thinking about this for wayyyyy too long now and wanted to get some ~thoughts~ & analysis written down! This post is going to be...fairly long, lol. Apologies in advance :D

  Also, if you can’t see the last gif (the one for ‘holy’), click here. Tumblr keeps fucking up the image when i try to upload it :////

  This post is probably going to be about 2/3 yorknew & phantom troupe/kurapika focused, 1/3 chimera ants, maybe with some references to other arcs (including manga-only arcs) mixed in. so, ofc, tons of spoilers ahead! also, i realize that my blog theme is hard to read (and i’m p sure clicking ‘keep reading’ sends you to the og post itself), so i’m linking the post w/ full text copy/pasted in on my art backup side blog (which has a more legible font) here. 

✶ 𝐃𝐄𝐀𝐓𝐇   I’m sure absolutely nobody is surprised with me starting here - there is just. SO. MUCH. DEATH. in hxh. & right from the start, one thing I noticed that togashi really emphasized was the #4 and its connection to death. in japanese, chinese, and im p sure some other asian cultures the number 4 is pronounced like the word for death so it’s associated with death in general, and boy oh boy does the ‘deadly number 4′ thing show up E V E R Y W H E R E. we get to the hunter exam, and hisoka is applicant #44. kurapika is #404. i didn’t notice it at first, but this was so intentional holy shit. togashi is NOT SUBTLE.

  So pika & hisoka are, right off the bat, associated with death. okay. and then there are even more clues to drive the point home: hisoka is member #4 in the phantom troupe, kurapika’s birthday is april 4th (aka 4/4). 100% not a coincidence (!!). with hisoka, it’s pretty obvious why togashi’s throwing all this death 444444 stuff around - dude is a psycho murder pedo clown, literally gets off on killing people (and there’s also the fact that judas sits 4th from the left in the last supper painting, and he’s sort of the judas equivalent for the phantom troupe). with kurapika, though, it’s a bit more subtle and woven deeper into his characterization, which i LOVE. togashi puts the mans in blue & gold & white (traditionally ‘pure’ or ‘heavenly’ colors), makes him so fucking kind & so good-hearted.....when he’s not relentlessly pursuing his revenge, ofc. more on this in the next section, but pika = death. togashi has made that v v v clear.

  Backtracking a bit to hisoka, though, I also just wanted to point out the 4 is death symbolism in the fortunes too (GOD i love the fortunes): in one translation, he’s the false fourth moon, and in the og japanese (i think), he’s the false hare (4th in the lunar zodiac or w/e it’s called. i don’t know the japanese cultural influences here, but in the chinese legend that established the zodiac animals, they race across the heavenly river & the top 12 animals got zodiac slots. the hare finished 4th, so it’s #4 in the cycle). 

  And just as a final note, Tserriednich is the fourth prince of the kakin empire, and also another dude who has a hard-on for murder & other gory shit. again: togashi is not subtle with this, lmfao

✶ 𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐘, 𝐔𝐍𝐇𝐎𝐋𝐘   As probably everyone who’s gotten to yorknew knows, togashi is so 0 fucks given when he wants to be. I mean there’s the whole thing where he just. took New York and decided, Yorknew. LMFAO, but also, he made the main antag of that arc be named chrollo lucilfer, sit around in a ruined church, have a reversed cross coat, pale & dark-haired/dark-eyed, generally dressed in dark colors, very terrible murder guy. liiiike......chrollo x devil symbolism game is 1000/10 at this point lmaooo

  And i know absolutely nothing about christianity in general, but pt/kurapika & yorknew arc is just so full of christian imagery/symbolism! one thing that i L O O O O O O V E though is how togashi really blurs the traditional christian-coded good/evil, holy/damned boundaries.

  Back to kurapika: he wears gold and blue, his coloring is very stereotypically ‘angelic’, he’s precious and good and kind. his chains are all about ~judgment~ and ~healing~ - some of the chains are also in literal cross shapes, aren’t they? And the chain dagger in his own heart...the imagery is very startlingly similar to the immaculate heart of mary, where the swords stabbing thru the heart apparently represent seven sorrows. IDK much about this stuff other than the visual similarities; literally had to google ‘daggers through heart christianity?’ to even get the name of that thing LOL. anyway, at first, it seems like togashi establishes him as the ‘angel’, the ‘good’, the ‘holy’ in the angel/devil, good/evil, holy/damned dichotomy between him and chrollo.

  But that’s not the end of the story. his entire storyline is driven by a huuuuuuuge giant desire for vengeance, first of all, and then there’s the scarlet eyes, which canonically are seen as demonic/cursed/what have you (according to one of the movies or smth? where they show pika as a 10 y/o?), and then we also have red eyes in modern culture being associated w pretty much the same thing (vampires, anyone?). the fight scene with uvo has everything in b&w besides the blood on his face & his red eyes & the moon (<<< more fortune foreshadowing & symbolism, i love to see it), and there are tonssss of scenes where he has to suppress his rage. so all of that is obviously not very angelic of him i would say LOL. in fact, what i find super interesting is that the scarlet/red eyes (which are ‘demonic’) is actually the driving factor behind his super powerful nen abilities; this ties in so well with the fortunes & death associations imo! the fortunes call him the ‘death-bringer’ in one translation, or ‘half-angel, half-death’, so that’s one side of pika = red eyes = death, but there’s also the fact that emperor time is literally draining his life force. so pika = death for both himself and others namely the pt, question mark?

  Now for chrollo: togashi’s devil symbolism is EXTREMELY overt with him, but i love the subtler jesus references too. the church thing, obviously, and the st. peters cross which is cuz st peter respected jesus too much & didn’t think he was worthy to die in the same way as him (or something like that, i am the most atheist person in the world & hxh is literally my entire christian education pls) but is also used as an anti-christianity symbol these days. bandit’s secret looks like a bible, lbr, and mans has a cross tattoo.

  Other things beyond visuals - 12 spiders, 12 apostles; hisoka’s betrayal, where member #4 can be thought to correspond to judas sitting 4th from left at last supper. and this miiiiight be a bit of a stretch, but i think the meteor city being the place of origin may also play into the blurred line between angel/devil and holy/damned here; meteors are defined as space rocks that are in earth’s atmosphere, becoming incandescent in the process. meteorites are for the kinds that actually reach the ground. and idk, lucifer was cast out of heaven / sky too right? so i think there might be some subtle fallen angel imagery/symbolism playing into the pt as well

✶ 𝐋𝐈𝐆𝐇𝐓 (𝐀𝐍𝐃 𝐃𝐀𝐑𝐊𝐍𝐄𝐒𝐒)   Last section yay! i don’t have as much to say about this, besides when i was making chimera ant arc edits & realized that there might have been some subtle gon/meruem parallels???

  So obviously, everyone knows that line killua says to gon - “you are light” - and then i was just remembering that meruem’s name means.... “light that illuminates all” (!!!!). maybe it’s a coincidence, but knowing togashi, i’m leaning towards nahhhh. there HAS TO be some kinda meaning there (!!).

  Going back to the events of the chimera ant arc....ooh boy. let’s see: gon is optimistic & hopeful even in the face of kite potentially being dead, killua says he’s light, they find kite & dude is fucked up, gon is pissed. gets all angry & ~dark~, especially during the palace invasion when he’s staring pitou down as she fixes up komugi. then the actual fight against pitou: more darkness, more anger, but through it all there’s still light, namely his jajanken being very orange & fiery lookin.....and that final sequence, where he puts all his possible nen he’d ever have into his ~final form~ or wahtever & turns into a male version of true form!bisky but dressed in a crop top & short-shorts (i am SCARRED, btw. s c a r r e d !). there’s just huuuge flashes of light as that’s going on, and it reminded me of supernovas or dying stars when i was thinking about it, where the star is like, collapsing under its own weight? & burning thru its own fuel, until there’s nothing left except a dwarf or black hole or what have you. one final, extremely deadly burst of light & energy before death.

  On the meruem side of things: born into a dark cave, exhibits a traditionally evil/cruel/wicked/whatever personality/traits so that has ppl associating him with darkness. then he gets to know komugi, starts to appreciate other aspects of humanity, seems like he could have actually turned into a decent person who doesn’t want to eat everyone - so that’s a ‘path to light’, maybe? - and then the extermination team yeets themselves into the palace, netero takes him out to bumfuck nowhere, they fight. netero’s fighting is just ALL light, from his giant ass golden 100-type guanyin bodhisattva to the poor man’s rose. again, there’s the sense of finality to it all, in a similar vein to dying stars: netero comes in determined to kill meruem no matter what, and we all know netero doesn’t flake. then we see netero get destroyed after the zero hand, and he triggers the rose, and everything is burning & on fire before the flames are put out and all turns dark again.

  But wait!!! pouf & youpi revive meruem and all he does is play gungi with komugi, even with the poison of the rose. he eventually dies, and the gungi pieces in that final shot of them together (i am BAWLING just thinking about it holy shit) has one that’s all white, one that’s a black ring and white inside. i assume all white is for komugi, who has never done ANYTHING wrong in her LIFE, so i like to think that the 2nd one is for meruem - born “into darkness”, literally & figuratively, but he turns something like ‘good’ by the end. it’s interesting how togashi has sort of gone for a bit of a subversion here: the hero going from light to darkness, and the main antag from darkness to light.

✶ 𝐂𝐎𝐍𝐂𝐋𝐔𝐒𝐈𝐎𝐍   AahhhhHHHHHhhh so if you read all the way down here through my LONG rambles, tysm! i would LOVE LOVE LOVE to hear what other people think about all this, and i’ve FOR SURE missed tons and tons of stuff - chimera ants is just. SO MUCH. and i don’t know it as well as yorknew eeek.

  I’m not sure if i’m really ~knowledgeable~ in any other areas relating to hxh, so this might be the only one of these that i do, but i definitely think about some of this - esp all the religious symbolism & #4 stuff - a ton! so in the meantime, if it’s of any interest, i’m just going to shamelessly plug my hxh x religious beliefs/superstitions edit series :D lots of love to all!!!

[trenchcas]

episode origins p1

i was watching moriah earlier today and was wondering what the significance of the name moriah was, so i searched it up. i’ll explain it here in this. i wanted to learn which episodes have titles derived from pop culture, literature, etc. so i put together this list. it’s not complete, feel free to reblog with more!

why did i waste hours on my life on this, you ask? i don’t know. 

season 1

pilot: obviously, all the first episodes of shows are called pilots. nothing new here.

wendigo: they’re fighting a wendigo

dead in the water: the phrase means “unable to function, move”.

phantom traveler: the name of the demon they’re fighting

bloody mary: based off the legend

skin: shapeshifters, also there might be a meta about how it’s a metaphor for dean

hook man: they’re fighting a hook man

bugs: bugs

home: they go home

asylum: they go to an asylum

scarecrow: scarecrow

faith: the concept of god first comes into play here, i thought that was pretty interesting. that’s why it’s called faith, duh. dean + faith is explored.

route 666: racist truck yes

nightmare: sam’s visions

the benders: i think it’s based off of the bloody benders, a family of serial killers

shadow: meg’s stalkery?

hell house: it was literally a hell house

something wicked: originally chanted by WITCHES in shakespeare’s macbeth. the full line is “something wicked this way comes, open locks, whoever knocks”. obviously the shtriga is a witch and it refers to that.

provenance: painting provenances, it’s in the episode

dead man’s blood: they use dead man’s blood

salvation: being saved or protected, like the boys and john do with the family

devil’s trap: the devil gets them in a trap. and they built a giant devil’s trap too.

season two

in my time of dying: based off of the led zeppelin song [x]

everybody loves a clown: based off of the gary lewis song [x]

bloodlust: i think it’s for the vampires but they were also a band in the 90′s

children shouldn’t play with dead things: based off of the 1972 movie

simon said: the whole “you do what i say” thing with andy and evil andy

no exit: it’s a song by blondie and in the episode h.h. holmes captures blondes...? am i just clowning

the usual suspects: based off of the 1995 movie

crossroad blues: based off of the robert johnson song (fave!) [x]

croatoan: i like this one. okay, so you guys probably know about the whole roanoke/croatoan thing in the 1600′s. so there’s a theory that the settlers were wiped out by a disease (similar to this town). also, the town would disappear off of the map.

hunted: gordon hunted sam

playthings: dolls, but the little girl was the grandma’s sisters plaything

nightshifter: a shifter in the night

houses of the holy: based off of the led zeppelin song and album [x]

born under a bad sign: based off of this song [x] there are a bunch of others including jimi hendrix but...?

tall tales: yeah i think this one is self explanatory

roadkill: someone got killed on the road

heart: werewolf heart but also how sam gave his heart to madison aww also there’s a band called heart

hollywood babylon: based off of the book by the same name

folsom prison blues: based off of the johnny cash song!! [x]

what is and what should never be: based off of the led zeppelin song [x]

all hell breaks loose: yes it did

season three

the magnificent seven: based off of the pretty famous western go watch

the kids are alright: based off of the who song [x]

bad day at black rock: based off of the 1955 movie

sin city: there’s a bunch of songs but the city was sinning so

bedtime stories: they were bedtime stories

red sky at morning: the full phrase is “red sky at morning, sailors take warning”. with the theme of this ep it fits pretty well.

fresh blood: fresh blood yes

a very supernatural christmas: i’m not sure. i think it’s based off of a christmas album?

malleus maleficarum: a 1400′s book of witches. latin for “hammer of the witches”.

dream a little dream of me: i love this song! based off this: [x]

mystery spot: mystery spot

jus in bello: i can’t really explain it but here [x]

ghostfacers: g h o s t f a c e r s

long-distance call: long distance call

time is on my side: based off of the rolling stones song [x]

no rest for the wicked: a biblical quote that means “evildoers will face eternal punishment”. also, “one’s work never ceases”.

season four

lazarus rising: in the bible, lazarus is the righteous man, which makes dean the righteous man. and he rises. so. 

are you there, god? it’s me, dean winchester: based off of the judy blume book (maybe?), are you there, god? it’s me, margaret.

in the beginning: they go back in time

metamorphosis: with the rugaru but also sammeh

monster movie: monsters and movies

yellow fever: referring to the disease i think, but also there are a few songs

it’s the great pumpkin, sam winchester: based off of it’s the great pumpkin, charlie brown.

wishful thinking: yeah

i know what you did last summer: dean + hell, sam + ruby. is it based off of the shawn mendes song? i don’t think it is because this came out way before the song.

heaven and hell: opposite sides meet, dean’s hell experiences.

family remains: there are remains

criss angel is a douche bag: idk?

after school special: based off of the abc program? i think?

sex and violence: there was a lot of sex. and violence.

death takes a holiday: death took a holiday

on the head of a pin: i’m not sure but this article is interesting, maybe related. probably related. [x]

it’s a terrible life: based off of it’s a wonderful life? i love that movie btw

the monster at the end of this book: ughhh! yes!!! first of all there’s a sesame street book by the same title. also, chuck actually was the monster at the end of the book! that’s crazy. insane. 

jump the shark: “(of a television series or movie) reach a point at which far-fetched events are included merely for the sake of novelty, indicative of a decline in quality.“ probably the whole long lost brother thing.

the rapture: a belief that christians will rise to “meet the lord in the air”. kinda like jimmy does.

when the levee breaks: based off of the led zeppelin song [x]

lucifer rising: lucifer rose

season five

sympathy for the devil: based off of the rolling stones song [x]

good god, y’all!: cas goes to find god

free to be you and me: a marlo thomas album and the brothers split up

the end: yeah it’s the end

fallen idols: i think we get it

i believe the children are our future: a lyric from a whitney houston song

the curious case of dean winchester: based off of the short story, the curious case of benjamin button.

changing channels: channels were changed. the end.

the real ghostbusters: based on the 1985 animation

abandon all hope: the full phrase is “abandon all hope, ye who enter here” and that pretty much sums up this episode.

sam, interrupted: i’m not sure?

swap meat: meats were SWAPPED.

the song remains the same: based off of the led zeppelin song [x]

my bloody valentine: based on jensen’s movie. but also the band?

dead men don’t wear plaid: based on the 1982 movie

dark side of the moon: a pink floyd album

99 problems: that one jayz song whatever

point of no return: a 1993 movie but also the poto song hehe

hammer of the gods: based off of the 1985 book i think? it’s about led zeppelin so probably yeah.

the devil you know: means that it’s better to deal with a situation you understand than one you don’t.

two minutes to midnight: this phrase is commonly used as a countdown to a global catastrophe (i.e. the fucking apocalypse)

swan song: someone’s final performance before retirement (i think this is about both brothers because it’s sam last battle and dean’s last fight before living with lisa)

season six

exile on main st.: based off of the rolling stones album [x]

two and a half men: it was a sitcom? but idk if that’s where it’s from

the third man: based off of the 1949 noir thriller? maybe? but there were also three men so idrk

weekend at bobby’s: it was a weekend at bobbys

live free or twi-hard: based off of twilight and that bruce willis movie that i watched once way back when

you can’t handle the truth: truth goddess. soulless sam gets exposed ig

family matters: based off of the 1989 sitcom? maybe

all dogs go to heaven: based off of the 1989 movie? probably

clap your hands if you believe: i think this is an original title idk

caged heat: based off of the 1974 movie i think

appointment in samarra: probably based off of the 1934 novel of the same name

like a virgin: based off of the madonna song [x]

unforgiven: sam does unforgiven things

mannequin 3: the reckoning: not sure

the french mistake: just... just read this link [x]

and then there were none: based off of the agatha christie novel of the same name

my heart will go on: y’all all know what’s up [x]

frontierland: they went to yeehaw town

mommy dearest: based on the 1981 film? maybe?

the man who would be king: based off of the 1888 novel by rudyard kipling

let it bleed: based off of the rolling stones album/song [x]

the man who knew too much: shares a name with the 1956 film

season seven

meet the new boss: they met the new boss idk

hello, cruel world: sad sam

the girl next door: there’s a 2004 romcom with the same name

defending your life: a 1991 romcom! wow!

shut up, dr. phil: sam and dean became philanthropists idk

slash fiction: hahahahaha i think we know what it means but wHY is it called that?

the mentalists: they met a bunch of magic people wow!

season 7, time for a wedding!: more like season 7, time for a slightly r*pey episode and GARTH!

how to win friends and influence monsters: based off of the 1936 book how to win friends and influence people

death’s door: they were at death’s door idk

adventures in babysitting: based off of the 1987 movie by the same name

time after time after time: based off of the cyndi lauper song? [x]

the slice girls: prolly based off of the spice girls idk

plucky pennywhistle’s magic menagerie: yeah idk

repo man: it’s a 1984 film too

out with the old: they were fucking around with antiques

the born-again identity: obviously based off of the bourne identity which i haven’t seen in forever

party on, garth: hahaha

of grave importance: it was very important

the girl with the dungeons and dragons tattoo: probably based off of the movie/book the girl with the dragon tattoo. 

reading is fundamental: reading is fundamental. go read a book.

there will be blood: there was blood

survival of the fittest: everybody fought idk

okay i’m gonna stop here for this one because i’m tired asf and i’ll do part 2 later 

[stonerbughead]

maria watches friday night lights (#4)

season 2, pt 2!! (2x08-2x15)

ugh Matt is really having his Being A Stupid Teenage Boy season huh?

-lol love a good naked dude being chased scene — in this case, Smash on his recruiting trip being chased around by a potential future teammate. Classic.

(it’s kinda cute that Matt came to pick him up tho)

- the latest in season 2 being off the fucking rails: really? Riggins’ new digs include a meth lab on wheels??

-Landry confessing to murdering someone and then having his sheriff dad drag him out of the station to go home is the whitest shit EVER. Like, Landry is literally *trying* to be punished and they just won’t punish his white, cop-kid ass. ‘Murica. (I mean don’t get me wrong: it WAS self defense against someone literally stalking and trying to rape Tyra, but the point still stands that if Landry was a black kid he’d have been tried as an adult and convicted no doubt)

-YESSSSS a MySpace shoutout! we love to see it

“I hate you” - Santiago (and also me) @ Buddy Garrity

-omg Coach Taylor noticing that things aren’t good at home for Riggins and taking him in, my heart!

-Wow in just one scene Riggins charmed baby Grace, warned Tami’s sister not to shame women for eating a lot (“it can lead to anorexia, especially in girls”) and then offered to go out to the store to get baby formula in the pouring rain. What a man.

-and yes, Shelly, you fully grown woman, it IS a bad idea to lust after a TEENAGE BOY

-wow Riggins protecting Julie from the SUPER DRAMATIC TORNADO that made me laugh. Do we get to have a Riggins-Julie friendship??? bc I’d be down. We need more friendships.

-Thank you, Tami, saying “EW” to her sister watching Riggins work out! Someone has sense to know a fully grown woman shouldn’t be lusting after a teenager! Julie can lust if she wants tho, that’s age appropriate.

-DYING at Landry being aghast that Tyra’s never heard of West Side Story.

-oh god, Lyla — it is totally fair to assume your mom would tell your dad she’s getting remarried, especially if she knew you’d be seeing him — so I’m sorry you’re the one who accidentally set off whatever nonsense Buddy is gonna pull now that he knows his ex wife is “marrying that treehugger.”

“Who’s that?” “Some douchebag named Chip. who names their kid Chip anyway?” Same, Tyra, same.

-Landry, one of my biggest pet peeves is asking someone out while they’re on the clock. Like, come on! let Tyra work, boy.

-Jesus Christ it’s like everywhere Julie looks, she has to see Matt making out with someone. That’s rough.

-and oop Matt you busted bc Julie actually knows who Carlotta is!

-once a cheater, always a cheater, Buddy. And yes to Pam for being like “nah bye I’m happy now, it is over.” You treated her like garbage so here we are, sir!

-hilarious that Landry is the one who ends up throwing the first punch that gets the post-tornado, school-crossover tensions to finally boil over

-I like that they show both the fall formal and the party where everyone who didn’t go to the formal is. Nice.

-Aw poor Julie got drunk af to deal with all her feelings. This really is the season where they have Julie and Matt being sixteen year olds in the most painful ways. So maybe it’s good they’re not together during this tho I’m still looking forward to when the tide turns their way again.

-anyway, Tim is a good friend for getting the creep who thought he was “one beer away from getting laid” off of Julie.

-And....in true Texas dad fashion, Eric Taylor misinterprets everything! Noooo. We can’t have nice things.

-This Noelle-Smash partnership is definitely an interesting pairing. Two very ambitious football people courting all these recruiters while Smash’s mom side eyes them in the corner? Hilarious.

-omg not this Oklahoma tech recruiter harassing smash’s mom in the grocery store! GTFO here! Give her some fucking personal space. They really do such a good job of showing as much of the toxic shit about football culture as the inspiring, big moments.

-Aw and I love that Tami tried to help Mama Smash get the guy to go away. It’s such a familiar scene, women helping each other get a dude harassing them away. And then they have a heart to heart in the parking lot? Love that.

-omg what a throwback that Shelly TAPED OVER Eric’s football game to tape a NEW EPISODE of The Office! Love it. “Y’all should get a TiVo.”

-omg watching Tami and Eric work out arguments is so beautiful, they communicate very well! We stan a good marriage.

-wow seeing the other coach from tornado school lose his shit publicly after he knocked down Riggins was uh....wild???? This is the second time he put his hands on Riggins!

-awww Eric actually coming to apologize to riggins for overreacting about Julie when he hears the real story??? Love it.

-Weevil from Veronica Mars shows up as a friend of Santiago’s? Of course.

-WOW and Logan from Gilmore girls as a Christian radio host...tracks.

“Is that your way of telling her you like her?” Jason making a surprisingly astute observation about Tim. (And Lyla.)

-yo why would you invite your daughter’s boyfriend’s family over for dinner just to say they shouldn’t date? (And bc it’s an interracial relationship.) Southern culture is wild to me lol

-wow the racist coach from last season is now off spouting his mouth about how “no wife of mine would be working with a kid at home.” I love that Eric calls him out as sounding stupid and ignorant — you better!

-hearing that Lyla burned her cheerleading uniform is one of the most badass things she’s done so far tbh along with that dealership destruction

-off the rails update: 2x12 was toooo much!! Like, Jesus between Smash’s sister getting harassed at the movie theater by the racists who hate on smash and Noelle...and this plotline with Santiago and his old friends trashing Buddy’s place...it’s like, can we breathe.

-I could not be more excited for Carlotta to leave and another teenage boy with adult woman relationship to end.

-wow can’t believe the plotline where Riggins stole $3000 from a drug dealer isn’t ending well for him. And now Smash is getting arrested bc of those racist guys from the movie theater episode? One recap I read said that too many of this season’s plots feel contrived and I think that sums it up.

-is there any character who HASN’T worked at Buddy Garrity’s dealership at this point?!

-and yikes at all the other salespeople being mad that a salesperson in a wheelchair was hired...y’all mad ugly and ableist for that

-Tyra and Landry are....confusing

-Wait Logan from GG is an actual preacher and not just a Christian radio host? CREEPY. And he kissed Lyla? A lot to unpack there.

-lol Tim trying to woo Lyla is kinda funny to watch simply bc Tim is clearly so confounded by rejection

-I love how much space they give for Smash’s sister’s pain in the Noelle-Smash theater incident. A lesser show wouldn’t have centered her as much.

-is it mean of me to say Jason is boring AF most of the time

-yeah this dreads girl is seemingly way more compatible with Landry than Tyra yikes! Like she made him a power metal mix cd???

-wow this Smash storyline where mouthing off to the press is what gets him suspended....really checks out bc teenage boys are dumb

-I love Tami as a volleyball coach and getting to see another sport! Also as someone who’s been on a losing team I know that feeling of finally winning a game!!! Go Dillon volleyball!!! (Am I maybe currently writing a Bughead fic based on my underdog field hockey experiences? ;) yes yes I am)

-Oh shit now Saracen’s at the nihilistic Nothing Matters phase of teenage angst. Right on schedule!

-lol these two short haired blondes (white dreads Jean and Tyra) being in a love triangle with Landry is wild

-Omg jean just said, “are you a friend or are you competition?” She is not playing!

-I love Riggins dragging Saracen to practice

“I don’t want you to become at an at-risk youth” -Landry teasing Saracen while also sincerely caring about him is some of the best friendship banter on this show. The accuracy 😂

-It seems like Julie gets a lot of hate? But I think I have such a soft spot for Julie bc I was a bitchy teenager with undiagnosed mental health disorders and I just wish so much #growth for her! Also I really do miss her and Saracen’s relationship, I’m so excited I’m almost at S3 where it seems like it’s happening again?

-LOL this guy at the dmv is the first person in Dillon to be like, “no I hate football.” That tracks.

-wow Saracen is getting driven to the hospital to make sure his grandma is okay by the sex worker who was just giving him a lap dance. Amazing.

-also I hope grandma is okay!

-okay Tyra throwing her hat in the ring for Landry at the last minute? Idk I think Jean deserves the win but there’s no way it’ll happen bc she’s a guest actor?!

-awww Saracen’s abandonment issues coming out whiles he in the tub after being sobered up by Eric Taylor. “There’s nothing wrong with you.” 😭 and “your daughter left me for a better guy” - will take that crumb — first mention of Julie out of Saracen’s mouth in a minute

-hey, Landry, my friend: flirting with a girl (Jean) to get her outside then dumping her immediately is kind of a wild bait and switch. But I get it, he’s been in love with Tyra for a long time and Tyra IS right — they had a very fucked up start to their relationship so it makes sense she needed a minute to process her ~feelings~. however I definitely identified closer to a jean in my high school experience L O L (minus the unacceptable white dreads)

-these Julie and Tami driving scenes are painfully accurate, btw. Love them.

-wow the scene of Smash hyping everyone up, the adrenaline/energy of the team cheering with helmets and a classic “clear eyes, full hearts, can’t lose” - then the whole team running out onto the field and leaving an empty locker room with just Smash breaking down into tears....#art

-alright y’all I’m gearing up for the last episode of S2! Thanks to @lockitin for reminding me this is the writers’ strike season — I was in eighth grade then and remember being pissedddd about the shortened fourth season of “the office” — so I’m fully prepared for the abruptness to come.

-I love when they parallel showing the white church and the black church

-and Tim going to church just to see Lyla makes me laugh

-ooooof Jason you cannot put on this waitress you had a one night stand with the fact that this could be your only chance to have a baby!!! Omg this poor woman who just pointed out she, too, is NINETEEN.

-wait so is Riggins doing a sports show on a Christian radio station? What?

“I think you’re really hot. Your long hair reminds me of Jesus” -Christian girls being horny for Riggins LOL

-awww Saracen being like “okay Landry you’re gonna impress Tyra right now” before that football play was a cute friendship moment for those two

-aww I love how this Smash storyline is turning out with Coach Deeks whose had his eye on him for six years my heart 😭

-also unclear to me whether Logan Huntzberger the Preacher is a fully grown adult dating a high school senior?? Biggest teen drama pet peeve once again! Stop this!

-Tami is my heroine for just leaving Eric at the restaurant fighting with her ex. “see you at home, honey!”

-I’m sorry, is Jason gonna like actually convince this girl to have a baby with her one night stand at 19??? Oh lol wait THAT ended up being the cliffhanger of the whole season? Fucking hilarious.

well I made it through season 2!!! Super psyched for Season 3, Jay has been hyping me up for it. See y’all next time! (I’ll try to post more for season 3 bc this accidentally got long af.)

[hazel2468]

Hi okay so tonight Yom Kippur begins and I’m fucking salty about everything so here we go. This is going to be long, but I am PISSED. In the same vein as my last post-

If I see one more goy trying to say that you cannot apply cultural appropriation to Jewish things because “Jewish isn’t a culture” or “Religion is universal”- I am going to shit a brick. 

Cultural appropriation is defined as “the unacknowledged or inappropriate adoption of the customs, practices, ideas, etc. of one people or society by members of another and typically more dominant people or society.” 

Now, am I going to get all bent up about other people using a six pointed star, or a tree, or a hand, as a symbol? Fuck no- shockingly, people come up with similar things (literally every culture has some kind of dumpling that they invented) all the time. But what I WILL get up in arms about is when I see Christians online (specifically the Book of Faces) talking about “celebrating” certain holidays (this includes Rosh Hashana, Passover, Channukah, and yes also Yom Kippur) to “honor” the fucking memory of Jesus. 

Taking the highest, holiest day of the Jewish people, ignoring the actual meaning and rules of practice, and changing it to be about your religious figure, who is not a meaningful figure in Jewish tradition, is the very fucking definition of cultural appropriation. It is the inappropriate adoption of the customs of a marginalized group by the dominant group. Jewish holidays are also more than a religious thing- our religious practices can have more cultural significance than they do spiritual significance. Jews who do not believe in Gd (atheist, agnostic, etc.) or Jews who are still trying to figure out what the fuck they believe (hi there) STILL take part in Jewish holidays not out of some obligation to Gd, but because it is something we do AS JEWS. It is our culture. 

The idea that Jewish practices cannot be subject to cultural appropriation because they are “strictly religious” is a majorly Christian-normative way of viewing religion. In a Christian-normative view of religion, religion and culture are separate (which btw is fucking ridiculous, I invite every goy who has EVER told me that religious Christianity has nothing to do with culture to look at how massive Christmas is, and NO Christmas is in no fucking way “secular”) and do not interact. Which not only is antithetical to much of Jewishness, but I would say to other cultures as well. 

If you are not Jewish (and just so I am perfectly clear, converts ARE JEWISH. I will not have people being shitty about converts on my posts- people who are converts, who are in the process of converting, who have just started their journey in converting, who are looking to explore their Jewishness that they have not had access to before for any number of reasons, people in interfaith families- this isn’t about them) you should NOT be celebrating Yom Kippur. You should not be celebrating Passover or Rosh Hashana or Channukah. You most CERTAINLY should not be celebrating those holidays and fucking trying to make it about Jesus and Christianity. It is appropriation, it is rude, and it is just antisemitic to do so. 

[evilelitest2]

Okay I'm going to be very careful with my words but I wanted to get a second opinion on this. We know besides the establishment being cowards and backing Biden he never would've gotten this far without older blacks. Do you think it was a bad call and against their best interests to vote for him despite his record showing he uh doesn't have the best track record on race? This is not me blaming anyone by the way.

Ok, this is complicated, an`d i’m seeing this talked about a lot, the African American vote.  some caveats because this is a really complicated subject

1) The african American vote is not universal.  Like the white vote, it is divided based on age, location (there is a big distincition in southern vs. northern vs. Western black voters), religion, income and class.  There isn’t a universal way to understand the african American vote, so eveyrthing I am going to say are generalizations and anyone reading this should be careful to fall into generalizations.  There are many african Americans who voted for Biden btw.  

2) Voters make their choice for a variety of reasons, some of which I am not getting into, and it doesn’t always affect their ideology.

I also want to make clear that I am talking about black voters who ideologically might actually like sanders platform more than Bidens, there are also many african americans who just are conservative (like whtie conservatives).  

Ok so something that people need to understand about the African American community, espicially in the south is this.  Since the Republican party is so defined by white Nationalsim, blacks are among the worse hit by any republican administraiton, this has always been the case.   like Trumps administration has hurt me personally in a few ways, but no where near as much as it is hurting racial minorities in the United States.  So a lot of African Americans tend to focus on “harm reduction”  when voting since they are the ones who get harmed.  

tied to this is the place of hte Democratic Party in black culture, where it is one of the fundemental pillars.  Espicially in the south, where the democratic party is sort of the one major national instiution actively trying to protect black Americans.  Like try to imagine the sheer level of shit that the Black Community in Missisopi or Alabama has to endure, being trapped in some of the most conservative red states.  So loyality to the democratic party is as fundemental in the black community as the Republicans party is to the eventalist community.  

Its also important to understand that as a rule, african Americans are the best voters in the country.  not just in the sense that they always go out to vote in every eleciton, its also that they tend to organize, voluenteer, give money, and raise awareness.  This is partly due to the very well established community focus of black culture, but its also because they know full well what happens if a Republican wins.    a good example of this was Doug Jones 2018 shocking victory in Alabama, which was only possible thanks to massive black voter turn out.  

The only other voting community as good as the African American in terms of being voters are the Evengelical Christian community, who are like their evil fundementalist twin.  But that is a story for another time.  

But you know how despite Trump clearly being an atheist, the religious right supports him because he gives them what they want, and Mike pence serves as their surrogate.  That is very similar to Biden with Obama as the surrogate, except that what the black community wants are objectively good things and not crypto fascism.  

Because of how good the black community is about getting the vote (espicially older black women) the democratic party relies primarilty on black voters.  And in the last 30 years, the black community has been extremely successful at steadily taking over the democratic party, and forcing it to address their issues.  Which is why Joe Biden in 1980 is playing nice with segergationists and Joe Biden in the 2020 is running on a platform of racial justice.  Because now the democratic party needs the african Americans to survive, they are moving steadily to the left on those issues.   If the progressive movement wants to really be successful, we really should copy their example, because that the political leaders of community knows exactly what needs to be done to acheive tangible results.   Ideally by turning many African Americans into progressives, but that would require the progressive movement to purge itself of its nastier elements (Chapo House) 

See the progressive wing of the party has a long history of valuing rhetoric over the pratical, and this alienates them to a lot of black voters who are desperately afriad for themselves and their families.  

and that is why they supported Joe Biden, because while many of them don’t actually like him and aren’t happy about his legacy on race, the fact is they know that he needed them to win.  And thus as a reward for supporting him, he will give them what they want (again just like the evengelical community for trump but not evil).  

specifically, they want the following 

A) A democratic Supreme Court.  The greatest blow to the Black community in the last 20 years (except Trumps election) was SCOTUS overturning the 1965 Voter’s Right act, which has been devestating to black voting power, espicially in in the south 

B) A national law to push back against voter repression 

C) Federal support for Black lives Matter

D) The Federal goverment to really crack down on the Alt Right and White Nationalism.  

E) Pushing to end the wealth gap between the black and white community (which shrank dramatically under obama).

And most importantly, get trump and his white nationalist supporters out of office.  

There are other policies obviously, but for many prominent african American leaders, Biden is a major way to acheive those ends and so they support him.  And biden frankly is likely to deliver, between his 8 years working with Obama and his reliance on the black community in 2020, many African Americans feel like he is somebody who is going to listen to them and take them seriously.  

So I don’t really feel comfortable saying that they are voting against their own best interest, instead they have a different set of “best interests” than what leftist usually consider.   There is more at play than a strictly materalist understanding of politics.  

[anonymoustalks]

You cant just oppress me for having different views, that's Fascism!!!!

(6-14-20) You both like politics.

You: heya

Stranger: Hello

You: anything on your mind today?

Stranger: No

You: fair enough ^^

You: any issues that you care about?

Stranger: Not really

You: is there a reason why you like this tag then?

Stranger: To talk about Politics

You: mhm anything particular about it?

Stranger: Anything

You: mhm do you have a particular political leaning?

Stranger: Fascist

You: ohh interesting

You: why fascism, btw?

You: I never really understood it

Stranger: Because it aligns with my values

You: your values being... strength? authority...?

Stranger: Strength, Honor, Spirituality, Race, Masculinity

You: I didn't realize spirituality was a big part of fascism

Stranger: Most people don't know anything about Fascism beyond something about the holocaust

You: fair enough

You: how did you learn about fascism?

Stranger: I read the Doctrine of Fascism

You: who is that by?

Stranger: Benito Mussolini and Gentile

You: oh is it good?

Stranger: It explains Fascism, it serves it's purpose

You: I guess so

You: are there like fascist communities out there?

Stranger: Not really

You: so it's mostly just you and yourself?

Stranger: I've known many other Fascists, but most of them are dead or in prison, so for now yes

You: ...how old are you?

Stranger: 29

You: I didn't realize that fascists end up in prison so easily

Stranger: Well we're Fascists living in a mostly liberal world

You: I guess so

You: I had a question about fascism actually

You: so... with many different fascist cultures... liking different racists... do you hate each other?

You: or do you get along because you're all kinda similar politically?

You: *liking different races

Stranger: Well this is a fundamental misunderstanding of our worldview

You: do you mind explaining more?

Stranger: So

Stranger: We don't hate each other even though we understand at some point we will have to kill each other

You: (wow that's dramatic...)

Stranger: To us that is simply reality, hatred is not necessary to accomplish this reality

Stranger: So why have any

You: I see

You: for me it's kind of difficult why so many cultures are transfixed with...

You: jewish people

You: idk

You: idk why the hate, in other words

You: *difficult to understand

Stranger: I don't hate jews

Stranger: The hatred towards jews came from the fact that many of them were Marxists

You: ah... I didn't know that

Stranger: Yeah I'm not surprised, most people don't know anything about Fascism but hate it anyways

You: what's your opinion of North Korea

You: are they more fascist or communist?

Stranger: They're just totalitarian. I wouldn't say they're either

You: so totalitarian =/= fascist

Stranger: Are you joking

You: idk, I really don't know much

You: I think of a long of strong personality figures who grabbed for lots of power in many fascist regimes

Stranger: Lol

You: sorry if I don't understand much

Stranger: It's not that you don't understand much you don't seem to know anything about it

You: yeah

You: so are there any countries today that are close to fascist?

Stranger: No

You: so what does a fascist state entail?

Stranger: That depends on the spiritual teachings in that particular race

You: hm...

You: I feel like I'm thinking about those religious states like iran

Stranger: What about it

You: idk just the wording of "spiritual teachings"

You: I think I'm just lost on what fascism means

You: like I think there are a bunch of countries that are fairly ethnocentric -- like I think Japan is pretty ethnocentric, right?

You: and other countries that have a powerful spiritual component

You: and others that emphasize a strong state power

Stranger: What's your point

You: do you mix them together and you get fascism?

Stranger: That's just right-wing populism

You: so what's the different between that and fascism?

Stranger: Fascism is not right-wing populism

You: So Wikipedia's definition is this: "Fascism is a form of far-right, authoritarian ultranationalism characterized by dictatorial power, forcible suppression of opposition, as well as strong regimentation of society and of the economy which came to prominence in early 20th-century Europe." which is why I'm a little lost

Stranger: That looks like it was written by a liberal college student

You: ^^ so how would you describe it then?

Stranger: Fascism is the syncretic blend of the Super-World and the Material world

You: umm, I'm a little lost by that ^^

Stranger: You're going to have to be more specific

You: I have no idea what "syncretic blend" and "super-world" and "material world" mean

Stranger: Syncretism is a union or attempted fusion of different religions, cultures, or philosophies — like Halloween, which has both Christian and pagan roots, or the combination of Aristotelian philosophy with the belief system of the early punk rock practitioners.

Stranger: Picture that, but with the union of a spiritual belief with a lifestyle and society

You: what kinds of spiritual belief?

Stranger: That obviously depends on your religious beliefs

You: I'm just a little bit confused about how that's different from an authoritarian theocracy?

Stranger: The Super-World is the metaphysical source of the material world, like Heaven

Stranger: Because not all religions are authoritarian in nature

You: interesting

You: it's quite a lot for me to wrap my head around

You: so if they're not authoritarian... how do they maintain a strong regimented state/economy?

Stranger: Why would they need to

You: well, I thought fascism wasn't very tolerant of per say democratic discourse

You: so something needs to enforce the ruling law?

Stranger: As I said, not all religions are authoritarian

Stranger: That is their problem

Stranger: They will figure it out

You: I see... do you mind if I ask about your faith?

Stranger: I am a Christian

You: is Christianity authoritarian?

Stranger: Yes

You: why is it authoritarian if you don't mind me asking?

Stranger: We can start with the most obvious

Stranger: Jesus Christ is meant to rule forever as King over heaven

Stranger: When the Hebrews asked God for a King, he gave them one

You: okay I see

Stranger: Here of course we see a strong condemnation of rebellious behavior:

Stranger: Romans 13:1-7 New International Version (NIV) Submission to Governing Authorities 13 Let everyone be subject to the governing authorities, for there is no authority except that which God has established. The authorities that exist have been established by God. 2 Consequently, whoever rebels against the authority is rebelling against what God has instituted, and those who do so will bring judgment on themselves. 3 For rulers hold no terror for those who do right, but for those who do wrong. Do you want to be free from fear of the one in authority? Then do what is right and you will be commended. 4 For the one in authority is God’s servant for your good. But if you do wrong, be afraid, for rulers do not bear the sword for no reason. They are God’s servants, agents of wrath to bring punishment on the wrongdoer. 5 Therefore, it is necessary to submit to the authorities, not only because of possible punishment but also as a matter of conscience.

Stranger: This, is naturally and clearly authoritarian

You: thanks

You: how do you handle the many denominations of Christianity?

Stranger: Well if it was up to me I would have all of their churches destroyed

Stranger: Infact I would have all churches destroyed

You: I see... what denomination is your church?

Stranger: I do not go to church

You: okay so definitely not Catholic XD

Stranger: No, I am a Christian

Stranger: I follow the teachings of Christ, not the teachings of a church

You: mhm okay

You: so what happens if you have a lot of people who resist... your interpretation?

Stranger: That depends on the level of resistance

You: idk people who disagree on teachings that obviously I'm not knowledgeable enough to speak about?

Stranger: Is English not your first language

You: mhm it is

Stranger: What do you think "level of resistance" means

You: open rebellion?

You: protests?

Stranger: Are you a woman

You: uhhh why does that matter?

Stranger: This seems above your ability to fully grasp so it makes me think you are a woman

You: oh okay ^^;;

Stranger: Are you

You: so if I'm not, then it is okay for me to grasp?

Stranger: If you are not then you are just a very stupid male

You: sure let's go with that

Stranger: Answer the question

You: I'm trying to understand

You: I'll decline to answer your question

You: does that qualify as open rebellion?

Stranger: Yes

You: I see... it's not very an aggressive form of resistance though?

You: it's kind of petty, actually

Stranger: And

Stranger: "You cant just oppress me for having different views, that's Fascism!!!!"

Stranger: Exactly

You: hm?

Stranger: Are you autistic or something

You: sure

Stranger: You seem incapable of understanding basic things

You: It's not a subject I hear a lot about, so I'm asking a lot questions so I understand

Stranger: Good Lord

Stranger: I am not even talking about Fascism

Stranger: That is what I mean

Stranger: Your ability to communicate with other humans seems to be handicapped

You: maybe, it's omegle though so it's fairly low stakes

Stranger: Lol

You: I mean I don't think I'm wrong lol

Stranger: How could you even if you were

You: tell if I'm wrong?

You: I have no idea

You: I feel like it's hard to tell without other people telling you

You: and then you reflect based on what others tell you

Stranger: I have never relied on others telling me I am wrong to decide if I am

You: I'm not sure if "reliance" is the right word

You: I guess I would call it "feedback"

Stranger: I will be back

You: and then "reflect" on a day?

You: okay

Stranger: I am back

You: ok

You: can't find my laptop charger

Stranger: Let us talk about being stupid

You: sure

Stranger: Do you know why you are stupid

You: why don't you tell me what you think?

Stranger: Because you were not born to be a grand leader

Stranger: You are a simple person meant to lead a simple life

Stranger: In the modern world, because everyone is full of themselves and feed their ego incessently this is an insult

You: an insult huh?

You: so how can you tell if someone is destined for greatness?

Stranger: Yes, because everyone wants to be special

Stranger: A person that is destined for greatness is marked by 5 signs

You: I think Western culture is heavily individualistic

Stranger: 1. Ability to endure any amount of humiliation

Stranger: 2. Can see the bigger picture of things, and is not limited by the perspective of their life

Stranger: 3. Understands people well and can make them work together

Stranger: 4. Has the will and strength to endure all tragedies of life

Stranger: 5. Is not enslaved by their own personal nature

You: That's a very interesting list

You: where did you get it from?

Stranger: I just came up with it

You: oh, that's cool

You: the suffering and humiliation is notable to me

You: have you experienced a lot of it?

Stranger: Yes

You: can you tell me more?

Stranger: The list is too long

You: is there something that stands out?

Stranger: And most of it is not worth mentioning

Stranger: Because I have grown out of all of it

You: I imagine that it's not a bunch of small things?

You: it should be a big thing, right?

Stranger: The point is, I have moved on, it is in the past and that is where it will stay

You: I see

You: What do you mean by not enslaved by their own personal nature?

Stranger: "I'm tired"

Stranger: "this is too hard"

Stranger: "I want to have sex"

You: mhm okay

Stranger: "I'm hungry"

Stranger: "I want more"

Stranger: "I want less"

Stranger: If you are able to conquer your nature then you will master your body

Stranger: Think about Kings and Emperors in history

You: I guess that's good

Stranger: The worst ones are always depicted as the ones who only cared about pleasure

You: right

Stranger: The ones that only cared about expensive clothing

Stranger: Things like that

Stranger: A King cannot be a master of his people if he has not mastered himself

Stranger: This is why Jesus Christ went through all the temptations of sin, and the physical torture

Stranger: Why he gave up all his things and lived as a nomad

Stranger: In order to conquer His body

You: mhm

You: what is your life like right now?

Stranger: In what context

You: idk, just in general

You: it sounds like you live a very disciplined life

Stranger: I try to

Stranger: I am closer than I ever have been, at least

You: that's good!

You: so it sounds like you've been through difficult times, and things are heading upwards?

Stranger: Something like that

You: mhm that's great

Stranger: Well

Stranger: If I end up homeless it is still better than having a home without discipline

Stranger: So I don't think we have the same definition of upwards

You: homeless?

Stranger: You don't know what that means

Stranger: ?

You: well yeah I do, but how would you end up homeless?

Stranger: How am I supposed to know? Anything can happen

You: I guess that's true

You: you just seemed worried about bad things in the future

Stranger: Bad things?

You: You said "I don't think we have the same definition of upwards"

You: meaning that from my point of view, I may not think you are heading upwards?

Stranger: My soul belongs to Jesus Christ, what could possibly be a 'bad thing' when I already have everything

You: mhm right

You: do you ever get lonely?

You: without a congregation or anything?

Stranger: No I do not

You: why did you stop going to church?

Stranger: I had no purpose there except to see a girl, and I considered that to be a wrong reason

You: Ah, okay

You: what kind of changed your views suddenly?

Stranger: It is never sudden, everyday (if you are trying) a person becomes more and more aware of life and pays more attention. You eventually start learning and changing accordingly

You: mhm okay

You: it sounds like it's been a long journey for you then

You: and an isolated road to?

Stranger: I am isolated now, for good reason

You: coronavirus?

Stranger: No

You: because?

Stranger: Because

Stranger: It is easy to be a Christian when your friends are Christians

Stranger: It is easy to be a Christian when you hear teachings from the bible every sunday

Stranger: It is easy to be a Christian when all the events you go to are by other Christians

Stranger: I do not want to lead this life because of the people around me, I want to be a Christian because I choose to be

Stranger: I can only do this alone

You: it sounds sad to push away everyone close to you though

Stranger: I will give you a hint, there was barely any pushing

You: is there a way to choose to be Christian yet still be close to others?

You: oh

You: was it always that way or did something happen?

Stranger: Yes

Stranger: You just need to pick Christ first, and friends second

Stranger: I grew up with a lot of friends, so it was the opposite for me

Stranger: I am not rectifying this

You: Ah...

You: well, if you are happy now, I guess that's fine

Stranger: Happy?

Stranger: Happiness has never really been important to me, I don't really care about it

You: fulfillment then?

Stranger: Sure

You: okay

You: how old are you?

Stranger: 29

You: you live alone?

Stranger: No, I live with my mother

You: mhm is she well?

Stranger: She is fine

You: that's good

You: can I ask why you think the way you do about women?

Stranger: Because women are not suited to be leaders

You: I mean you seemed to think women weren't able to comprehend the things you were talking about?

Stranger: Yes

You: why is that?

Stranger: Because women are not suited to be leaders

You: I mean comprehending doesn't have to do with leading, does it?

You: They're different skill sets

Stranger: ...

Stranger: If you cannot comprehend it, it is because it is beyond your station

You: ...

You: I mean, comprehending a book is entirely different than leading an army

Stranger: This is exactly what I am talking about

Stranger: You are not even on the same page as me

Stranger: What I just said went completely over your head

You: Yeah it did

You: Are you suggesting that comprehension is essential to being a leader? That makes sense

You: But the inverse seems like a stretch to me

You: that being a leader is necessary to read books?

Stranger: No

Stranger: I am saying if you cannot understand what is being said, that is because you do not need to

You: oh, okay...

You: for some reason I had interpreted that as "unable to" versus "do not need to"

Stranger: Okay

You: so basically you believe people are destined for certain things?

Stranger: Yes

You: and there are certain signs that indicate you are destined for greatness?

Stranger: Yes

You: how does greatness manifest in different lifetimes and times?

You: I mean, you said for yourself that this isn't really a time for fascism

Stranger: When did I say that

You: well that western society isn't very kind to it

You: so it's a little hard to imagine a fascist society popping up in America in our lifetime

Stranger: So I'm here waiting for you to make a point

You: I don't really have a point?

You: I was hoping to understand how you view greatness

You: in a culture and society that doesn't appreciate your views?

Stranger: What does American culture and society have to do with how I view greatness

You: I sounded like you implied that you were destined for greatness, but I may have misread your meaning

Stranger: I am

You: so how will you be great?

You: I guess that's my question

Stranger: That remains to be seen

You: Do you have a sense of what direction it will be?

Stranger: It is more important to focus on the day and hour you are living in

You: that's fair

You: I guess it's true it's important not to get ahead of ourselves

You: I was wondering you had any specific goals or dreams

Stranger: Follow God, that is all I need to do

You: mhm

You: So it's kind of like God will show you the way when it's the right time?

Stranger: He always does

You: right

You: Do you come on Omegle a lot?

Stranger: When I have nothing else to do

You: Do you have any other hobbies?

Stranger: Training

You: working out or something more specific?

Stranger: Working out

You: Mhm I think that's good

You: does your mom still work?

Stranger: No

You: and yourself?

Stranger: I was employed, but I realized I was there for the wrong reasons and left

You: Ah... what kind wrong reasons?

Stranger: I was only going because I wanted to see a girl

You: ...Were there multiple girls?

You: The church one and also the work one?

Stranger: Yes

You: oh

You: And dating is sort of incompatible with your faith?

Stranger: No

You: It's a little bit harder for me to understand going to work for the wrong reasons

You: like I can understand going to church for the wrong reasons

You: but work I'm not sure if I understand

Stranger: How is it any different

You: Mhm, I feel like faith is different?

Stranger: It has nothing to do with faith

You: I mean I feel like you should go to church for your faith, not for romance

You: on the other hand, I don't really see anything wrong with liking someone at work

You: (or school or something else similar)

Stranger: I cant believe this has to be explained

You: sorry

Stranger: There was a girl at church

Stranger: I liked her

Stranger: I was only going to see her

Stranger: So I stopped

Stranger: There was a girl at work

Stranger: I liked her

Stranger: I was only there to see her

Stranger: So I stopped

Stranger: How is this confusing to you

You: I think I'm just not understand why you decided to stop seeing the girl at work

You: if you're able to keep working, that is

Stranger: Because I was not working

You: oh okay

Stranger: I spent most of my time talking to her

You: right

Stranger: And would regularly tell my manager to mind his business if he ever mentioned it

You: right

You: are you looking to get another job?

Stranger: No, I need to set myself right first before getting back into the world

You: mhm

You: I guess that's understandable

You: how does your mother feel?

Stranger: She is fine

You: it's good if you have a good relationship with her

Stranger: Yes

You: what kind of work did you do?

You: before?

Stranger: Industrial Labor

You: Will you be okay financially?

Stranger: Yes

You: That's good

You: I wonder what the coronavirus was like in your area

Stranger: I don't pay attention

You: how do you normally spend your day these days?

Stranger: Training and reading

You: What kind of reading?

Stranger: The bible and military history

You: Why military history?

Stranger: Because I like it

You: Ah okay

You: have you always liked it?

Stranger: Yes

You: favorite period?

Stranger: I don't have a favorite period

You: oh I thought a lot of people had a favorite battle or a favorite country/nation

Stranger: Okay

You: okay

You: well, if the conversation seems to be dying down, thank you for explaining things

Stranger: For all the good it will do

You: who knows, it was an experience for me, I guess?

You: in either case, I wish you the best!

Stranger: Lol

You: is it that funny?

Stranger: Yes

You: >.>

You: Why? Are you used to getting tons of hate or something?

Stranger: Because I am a Fascist. You hoping "the best" for me would most likely work against you

You: Mhm, I guess I'm taking my chances lol

You: to me you're still a person

You: living somewhere in America

Stranger: What does that have to do with anything

You: idk, I think our worldviews don't really align -- I kind of wish for everyone to find happiness

Stranger: Why

You: call me a pacifist or something idk

You: I dunno, do I need a reason?

Stranger: It just seems arbitrary to me

You: I'm not sure why I have the values that I do

You: they are somewhat important to me though

Stranger: They are strange to me

You: I guess

You: I suppose I don't have the strongest sense of self-preservation

You: I was slightly suicidal years ago

You: although I'm better now

Stranger: I consider people that commit suicide to be pathetic, depending on the reasoning

You: I didn't have strong reasoning, probably just generic mental health issues

You: in either case, having greater purpose of some kind makes me feel better

You: for me, being able to spread something positive is meaningful

Stranger: For me the only appropriate time to kill oneself is if you are about to be captured by an enemy

Stranger: If you are paralyzed

Stranger: If you can no longer walk

Stranger: If you lose your reproductive organs

You: These seem heavily honor-focused

Stranger: That is the kind of person I am

You: I seems like your honor means a lot to you, which I guess is honorable too

You: (my goodness the pun lol)

Stranger: Well

You: although I mean not sure if all of those things are worth a life, at least in my view

Stranger: I am a man, if I cannot protect the women in my life then I have no reason to live

You: I'm not really sure how to respond to that

Stranger: If a man cannot defend his people, then what is the point of his existence

Stranger: Seems pointless to me, better off just killing yourself

You: I think people can find things important to them over time

You: and I think we all experience loss

Stranger: It doesn't matter if they find something important to them

Stranger: They are useless if they cannot defend women

You: ^^ maybe some women don't want to be defended?

Stranger: What kind of woman would not want to be defended from an attacker

You: It is figurative in multiple different ways

Stranger: What?

Stranger: Why would a woman not want someone to defend her from an attacker?

You: I think some women don't want to be defended from unspecified "threats", if they have't asked for help

Stranger: So if someone is breaking into my home an tries to attack my mother, I need to wait for her to ask me for help?

You: nope, depends on the person

Stranger: It depends on the person?

Stranger: There are women out there that would get angry if you stopped a rapist from raping her?

You: I think I'm referring to less literal things than that, but I feel like this is a difficult conversation to have

Stranger: I do not find it difficult

Stranger: Again

Stranger: There are women out there that would get angry if you stopped a rapist from raping her because you did not ask her first?

You: I think I was somewhat reacting to this link: "If a man cannot defend his people, then what is the point of his existence"

You: If you failed do defend someone you love, I don't think they would want you to commit suicide

Stranger: You misunderstand me, yet again

You: likewise, I don't think that people always hold those expectations that men will defend women anymore

Stranger: A wife does not expect her husband to protect her?

Stranger: A mother does not expect her son to protect her?

Stranger: A daughter does not expect her father to protect her?

Stranger: A sister does not expect a brother to protect her?

You: I think there are circumstances that a husband can misunderstand what constitutes "protecting" his wife

Stranger: We are not talking about those circumstances

You: Someone more conservatively minded may consider that a a certain male friend that daughter has is a threat

Stranger: I do not care about that

Stranger: I know what I am talking about

Stranger: And that is all that matters

You: okay

Stranger: I am not interested in how others interpret it

Stranger: I am talking about what I am talking about

Stranger: Not how others would perceive that

You: okay

Stranger: So why are you bringing that up?

You: I dunno, it didn't sit very well with me for some reason

Stranger: You are against protecting the women you care about from attackers?

You: No, I think I had a different interpretation of your statement than you meant it

Stranger: What I said was very straight forward

You: I was just thinking of times when other people wanted things for me that I didn't want for myself

Stranger: You were thinking of a time someone broke into your home or raped you, and got angry at someone intervening?

You: Nope, we are thinking of different things

Stranger: What I said was straight forward

Stranger: How could you misinterpret it?

You: I think the mentality was similar to something else that I recognized

Stranger: So you accused me of something instead of asking me to clarify

You: Sorry; I think we just took "defended" to mean different things

You: Like for me I was thinking of the more figurative instances like: "I am defending your interests" "This is good for you" "That's bad for you"

Stranger: I never said anything like that

You: You didn't

Stranger: The exampled I gave were of paralyzed men or missing limbs or unable to walk

Stranger: It should have been obvious that when I said defending I was talking about something physical

You: Yeah, sorry, I think my own experiences just got in the way

Stranger: But instead your pathetic biases lead you into a conclusion that was erroneous

Stranger: Because you have a preconceived notion of what certain people are like

Stranger: Nothing to say?

You: Yeah, not really, sorry

Stranger: So what are you waiting around for?

You: I tabbed away briefly

You: I'm not sure what I'm waiting for

You: what about you?

Stranger: I am waiting for a response

You: I admit that I have baggage

You: I think a lot of people have baggage, and it leads to numerous misunderstandings

Stranger: I have absconded with mine. Why haven't you?

You: Hm? I don't always perceive it as a weakness though

You: I think we are the sum of our experiences

You: the good ones and the bad ones

Stranger: You are making me angry

You: sorry

Stranger: I cant stand when people blame their past for their behavior

You: what should I say instead?

Stranger: How about nothing

Stranger: How about you instead let go of the past and not let it dictate who you are

You: I don't exactly have a bad relationship with my past though

You: I like the way that my past has shaped the current me

Stranger: Why were you hesitant to tell me you are a woman

You: well let me scroll up

You: "This seems above your ability to fully grasp so it makes me think you are a woman"

You: ^ How would somebody not react negatively to that?

Stranger: Why would you hide it

You: Because I was annoyed for a moment and decided to be annoying in a brief moment

Stranger: Typical female behavior

Stranger: Passive aggressiveness and pettiness

Stranger: Did that annoy you too?

You: No, I'm not really that surprised anymore

Stranger: How old are you

You: 26

Stranger: I thought I was talking to a teenager

You: mhm, I've been told similar before

Stranger: Are you married

You: no

Stranger: Why not

You: why should I?

Stranger: Are you ugly

You: lol does it matter to you?

Stranger: Yes

You: sure, let's say I'm ugly then

Stranger: What do you look like

You: I don't feel any need to continue this conversation down this path

Stranger: Lol

Stranger: Alright then

Stranger: Does it make you uncomfortable

You: yes and no, but mostly no

Stranger: So what is the issue

You: I have my own moral standards too

Stranger: Do your moral standards prohibit you from talking about your face

You: pretty much

You: you can think of it as a high bar that makes it easy to define something black and white

Stranger: What is your race

You: loool

You: why do you suddenly care now?

Stranger: You said 'black and white' and it reminded me of something I forgot to ask earlier

You: lol

You: do you normally ask early on?

Stranger: Yes, it is important to know

You: lol I guess it's your fault for forgetting to ask

Stranger: Yes, so what is your race

You: I'm skipping this question and leaving it to you to interpret it in the worst way possible ^^

You: seems fun to me

Stranger: You are Asian

You: why would you think that?

Stranger: I am a racist. Determining race is inherent

You: it's kind of amusing to me that you picked asian

Stranger: Well if you must know

Stranger: You tend to take things a little literally, and you have a formal tone, and that is typical for Asians

Stranger: The way you respond to certain things suggests a very foreign cultural background

Stranger: All of that to me says Asian

Stranger: Oriental, rather

You: Fine, helpful of you to put it into words I guess

Stranger: Is it still amusing

You: Maybe?

You: I thought certain things were just me though

Stranger: So can you tell me your race

Stranger: If you are worried that I will make fun of you for it, I do not mock people anymore

You: nah, I won't share details

You: I'm a little stubborn in the sense that once I've decided something, I'm pretty adamant about it

You: but you are welcome to believe what you believe

Stranger: What is the purpose of not sharing that detail

You: it's an emotional defense mechanism for myself

You: there are certain lines that I do not cross on omegle

Stranger: I already said I will not mock you or use it against you

You: it is a rule that I hold myself to

You: that's not really the point

Stranger: Alright then

Stranger: Let us talk outside of omegle

You: lol and that is one of my rules lol

Stranger: Unfortunate

You: is it?

Stranger: I will not insist

Stranger: Yes

Stranger: I was starting to like you

You: I'm flattered, but I'm not interested in using omegle for those purposes

Stranger: What purpose are you referring to

You: mhm, getting to know people in the many ways that it means

Stranger: That is disappointing

You: I am actually rather distrusting and antisocial to some regards

You: in either case, I'm not interested in friends

Stranger: I understand

You: In either case, thank you for spending this time with me, and I feel like I was able to hear a lot

Stranger: Alright

You: best wishes to you and your mom!

Stranger: Lol

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #246

(song lyrics here idc)

What is the most you’ve ever eaten in one sitting? I don't know. Probably too many slices of pizza back when I could kill pizza if I was hungry enough. How often do you skip breakfast? Rarely. What’s the longest you’ve gone without leaving the house? A couple+ weeks, probably. Where are you going the next time you go out? School. What kinds of things are likely to make you cry? Reunions of like any type, seeing things (esp. animals) in pain, if my feelings are deeply hurt, deaths... stuff like that. Really nothing unusual. What are some things that make others cry that don’t make you cry at all? Hm. I dunno. I'm sure there's something, but I'm unsure. If you drink/smoke, how often do you do these things? I don't smoke, and I'll ever only have like a drink or two on some holidays or for my birthday. What website do you spend the most time on and why? YouTube because it essentially replaces television for me. What’s the most amount of time you’ve spent online? Is this usual for you? Oh my god don't ask me this. What is one belief you used to have, but no longer do? In what ways are you influenced by the opinions of others, if ever? The one I disdain the most was being homophobic up to my late teenage years. I wanna curb stomp that ignorant fucking kid. I wouldn't say I'm influenced by other's opinions on things very much. What was the last thing to make you feel good about yourself? Drinking water lmao. How would you describe your overall (or preferred) personal aesthetic? My friend recently described me as a "gothic lolita" and y'know he's onta something. What kinds of small judgments are you likely to make about others? *Small* judgments? Uhhhh... God why am I blanking on surveys so much lately. What was the last thing you did mostly because society expected you to? Shower, 'cuz I seriously wasn't feeling it but needed to anyway. When was the last time you felt out of place? I had to babysit my nephew on my own early last month and I felt like I was in a different universe. I felt so, so unfit in the position and just all-around uncomfortable. I love that boy to death but babysitting is noooooot my thing. Do you believe in aliens, spirits, or angels of any sort? Yeah. Well, not "angels" by true definition, no. In what ways are you superstitious? I'm not. Where was the last place you went walking and how far? Would you rather exercise alone or with other people? Like, for fun? Not since I was at Sara's. I DO NOT like exercising in front of other people at all. What kinds of nail polish colors do you prefer to wear? How about makeup? Black is the entirely superior makeup color. How would you describe your own relationship with makeup? It's just for fun for me when I actually feel like it, and even that's rare. I usually only put makeup on for some pictures. Who has been in your life the longest amount of time? What about the shortest? My mom the longest, and my school teachers the shortest, I guess? Who was the last person to leave your life? How about return to it? My fucking therapist that deserves my fist through her face. Return, uhhhh yeah I dunno. It might be Sara, and that was yearsss ago. When it comes to travel, what kinds of places intrigue you most? Wildernesses, especially with mountains, rivers, waterfalls... that kind of stuff. Do you think humans colonizing Mars is a good idea? Would you go, if you could? No. Focus on the goddamn planet we're already on. If it was a life or death situation, I'd go, but otherwise, I'm staying here and at least trying to patch it up. What is the farthest you’ve walked in one day and what made you do it? Oh, many miles, I'm sure. I used to walk for literally hours out in my yard at night with my iPod. That was so common for me. Funny how now I'm recovering from muscle atrophy in my legs. Do you have a chore/housecleaning routine or anything like that? A "routine," no. How organized would you say your living space is? The house is currently a travesty. What is something important that’s often on your mind lately? Success in school. Do you find it easier to forgive yourself or others? Others. Have you ever had to call 911? For who/what reason? Yes; Mom thought she might've been having a heart attack. Thank fuck she wasn't. Do you like oatmeal? If so, what kinds of things do you like in it? Oh yeah. It's like a regular for me now that I'm big time trying to lose weight. I like the apple cinnamon one. What was going on the last time you felt nostalgic? Thinking about that walking question. How much attention do you pay to the movements of the stars and planets, and do you believe they influence anything? The most non-Pagan belief I have is being void of this one. No. When was the last time you were afraid to tell someone something? Heh, speaking of being (mostly, ig) Neo-Pagan. Classmate and I were doing an assignment getting to know each other and she asked my religion. She was a serious Christian and was clearly SO uncomfortable when I awkwardly answered lmao. When was the last time something didn’t go the way you expected it would? My disability case hearing just a week back. I expected to be way, way more terrified, shaking even, and was prepared for an intimidating judge. Just in general I was afraid of it being "court-like" and with a lot of people, but it was okay. I think having my attorney there was crucial to my (relative) calmness, though, because I was comfortable with and liked him. What is the most difficult or involved video game you’ve ever played? Most difficult that I ever tried, Dark Souls. Quit that waaaay early. Hardest that I've beaten, I honestly think The Legend of Spyro: The Eternal Night. Don't even @ me w/o trying it yourself 'cuz that game was so fucking hard to where I rage-quit for years until beating it. I did play it a second time for fun, though. Still hard. Most involved, oh, easily World of Warcraft. Years of effort put into too many characters la;ksdjfawoei Have you ever taken lessons for anything? Yeah; dance for a very long time as well as guitar. What’s your favorite band’s name? Well Ozzy goes solo. Btw I nearly died when I heard the Parkinson's news wtf life how dare why him- Who is your last sent text to? My mom. What’s your favorite flavor of Gatorade? I do noooot like Gatorade. What does your bikini look like? Oh hunny I'm barely comfortable in a one-piece. Do you drink the milk after you finish cereal or just leave it in the bowl? I can almost never drink it. The taste is just changed and is usually gross. Have you ever worn glitter eyeliner? No, yikes. Imagine that getting in your eye. Has anyone ever called you a hippie? I don't think so. Did you have any unread texts this morning? No. Have you ever been involved in strength training? No. Who is the last person you kissed? Sara. Have you ever been to a pottery painting store? No. Are bonfires common with you and your friends? Not at all. I don't think I've ever done that with friends. If you’re really quiet, what is probably the reason? I'm thinking about something intently. What does your boyfriend/girlfriend call you? N/A How much does the last person you kissed mean to you? A whole lot. Do you use lotion? If my skin is particularly dry. Have you ever used a sewing machine? No. Is hairspray a staple in your morning routine? I've never regularly used it. Do you believe in teenage love? Fuck yes I do, I can promise you that. When is your favorite TV show on regularly? It's discontinued. Who is your favorite person to waste time with? Sara. What has been the most significant thing to happen to you this year? Well, it's the first day of February, so I'll imagine you're asking about the past year, in which case I went back to school. What kind of kid were you when you were seven? Happy, weird, kinda hyper, outgoing and goofy. Do you always eat those mints you get at some restaurants? Yeah, if they're not the semi-soft ones that kinda melt in your mouth. Ew. Is there a subject you know so much about that you’d be able to teach it? Sure, but nothing like seriously important. Do you believe that being ‘cultured’ is important? Why or why not? I mean, probably if you travel. It's definitely wise to try to act at least semi-"appropriately" in another country. Where did you purchase the computer you’re using right now? Best Buy or Office Depot, idr. Do you think it’s fair to compare Family Guy to The Simpsons? I don't care? Will you miss CDs if they end up going obsolete? Why or why not? Not really, I just don't care. If you could relive one hour of your life so far, what would you choose? I don't have a clue. Do you think animals have a sense of humor? Probably. Animals can definitely act silly. Are you proud of your hometown, or do you try to distance yourself from it? That place is shit. Has your idea of the perfect romantic partner changed with age? Oh yeah, to a degree at least. I had such a fairy-tale ideology on love back then. How many cars have you ever owned? Myself, zero. Can you do math in your head well? I almost can't at all. What’s your favorite flavor of potato chip? Oh man, that's hard. Maybe salt and vinegar. Do you ever read the weather forecast? I mean I'll check the app on my phone occasionally. Do amusement park rides make you sick? Thus far in my life, no, but I'm too afraid to try some out of fear of that. Who is your favorite Star Wars character? Don't even like SW. What kind of cheese do you put on your sandwiches? American. What radio station do you listen to the most? None. Who was the last person to give you a gift? A family friend for Christmas. How old were you when you got your driver’s license? I'm about to be 24 and still don't have it. What was the first thing you ever learned how to cook? Scrambled eggs. Did you ever collect beanie babies? Maybe? I know I had one big one (me and my sisters had a matching set of different colors; mine was pink, what a shocker), but idk if I actually collected them. When was the last time you got a haircut? Early last month. Have you ever been to a bachelor/bachelorette party? No. How many people can you say you TRULY love? Romantically? Two. Platonically, a whole lot. Where are you most ticklish on your body? My feet jfc. Have you ever bailed anyone out of jail? Nope. What’s the last board game you played? Shit, what's it called. Something with my nephew. It's the one with the popping dice in the middle and four different colors to move around the board. "Sorry!" or something? Have you ever given someone a fake phone number? Might've when stupid kid me made prank calls. Do you have any bumper stickers on your car? No. Do you leave good tips when you eat out at restaurants? I've never been the one paying. Do you still own any VHS tapes? I'm sure Mom has home videos stored somewhere. If there was a real Jurassic Park, would you visit it? Oh fuck yeah 'cuz I'm dumb and love dinos. Have you ever gone golfing? Not legit golfing. Do you know any sign language? No. How many friends do you have that are married? Close friends, like people I still regularly talk to, none. Do you still have your wisdom teeth? Yes. Did you have a swing set in your yard when you were a child? Yes. Do you eat your mac & cheese with a fork or a spoon? I don't really care so I haven't noticed which I usually use. Where did you have your first kiss? His bed. When you were a kid, were you ever afraid of cooties? Lol no. Do you ever go Christmas caroling in December? No, I could never omg. Which overrated tattoo are you sick of seeing? I don’t care. Get what you want. What was the last thing you taught a younger kid? Apparently to say "aw shucks" at everything lmao. Are the clocks in your house mostly digital or analog? Digital. We have on analog in the living room. How long have you had your television(s)? God, years. A loooong time, but it's a fine TV. Do you like watching movies made with CGI or do you prefer hand-drawn ones? I tend to enjoy CGI more. I like realism in what I watch. Where did your parents buy their car(s)? Dad, idk. Mom got hers for free; a dance friend ran into a deer, so the front bumper got fucked up, and she wanted a new vehicle. Mom took it because shit, it was drivable, and she DIY fixed up the bumper to make sure it stays in place. Literally with zip ties and duct tape lmfao but HEY it WORKS. Do you know why your grandparents chose your mother’s name? No. Do you think you’d do well at teaching the English language to a foreigner? I think I'd be at least decent. What is a store you like that is exclusive to your country? Idk what's only exclusive to the country. If you attend school, what time do you usually get home after? Like, 4:35 or so. Mom finishes her field work at 4, and afterwards we go home. Have you written a resume before, either for yourself or someone else? Yes. What is your favorite thing about snow? IT'S PRETTY. What do you usually do when you have trouble sleeping? Try to go back to sleep at first, and if I really can't, I get back up on the laptop for a while. Are you satisfied with your social life (or lack thereof)? NONONONONONONONO. What TV show do you just assume you wouldn’t like? 13 Reasons Why. Do your friends have more money than you? lol duh I make none. Who always has the power to make you feel intimidated? Pretty much men as a whole...

[birdsy-purplefishes]

I have MANY thoughts and feelings about Midsommar.

Okay I saw Midsommar last night and it was an experience. So this post is probably going to be long and rambling and it is definitely 100% for-sure going to contain some spoilers. I’m gonna put a whole lot of it behind a Read More.

First, though, I want to say that while I thought this film was great it is definitely one of the most disturbing things I have ever seen. I went into it knowing almost nothing--and honestly I wouldn’t have been prepared even if I had read spoilers--and that was the ideal way to see it for me but there are many triggering things and some very problematic things in this film. I’m gonna try to be vague as possible but you might not not to watch this one if anything from the following list is something you can’t handle. That said: I am very easily disturbed by a lot of things and I found that this film was so bizarre that I never really felt like I couldn’t finish it. It’s... kind of weirdly selective about which gruesome stuff it shows and what it doesn’t. The most terrifying things to me were implied things and I didn’t realize them until after it had ended. Somehow... miraculously... this film didn’t come across as gore/torture-p*rn to me. So Trigger Warning / Content Warnings for this movie: Violence, blood, gore, horrible suffering. Sex, nudity. Mental illness and stigmatization/perpetuation of harmful myths about mentally ill people. Suicide. Ableism. Racism. A rape scene that I think most people didn’t even realize was a rape scene because it’s bizarre and left somewhat ambiguous. Emetophobia triggers. Body horror. A whole lot of drugs. Squicky grossout stuff. Emotional, psychological, and religious abuse. 

There’s probably other stuff I forgot. Basically everything horrible is in this movie. It was definitely worth it but it’s a hard watch.

Okay, now for spoilery stuff.

The backstory shown in the first few minutes is incredibly disturbing. Dani’s bipolar sister murders their parents and kills herself. It’s graphic. It’s disturbing. It definitely portrays suicide in a negative light, which is pretty much good, but: can horror movies stop perpetuating myths about mentally ill people?! This stuff is damaging! It makes mentally ill people out to be monsters and then ignorant people treat them worse. It makes mentally ill people feel like there isn’t any hope for them! This part sucked a lot. The only interpretation of this that isn’t awful is the fan theory that there are clues in the background that suggest that the cult may have actually framed Dani’s sister but that’s kind of a stretch. None of the other foreshadowing in the film is as subtle as the supposed hints that the cult fabricated the whole thing so I doubt it.

The foreshadowing is actually super obvious. It’s the typical horror film where the characters have no idea what’s going on & you’re like “DUDE GET OUT OF THERE!” the whole time. People on the subreddit are pointing out all kinds of foreshadowing and even the tapestry at the beginning shows you who all of the characters are and like 90% of the story.

Dani’s boyfriend, Christian, sucks. His friends suck. There’s a lot of macho bullshit and they’re just cold and dismissive. And the boyfriend’s a manipulative little leech. You hate him so much! I found myself hoping that she’d kill them all except maybe the cute friendly Swede. Basically the entire movie he’s gaslighting and dismissing her and his friends talk shit about her constantly. It’s the typical “oh, women are irrational and over sensitive” macho bullshit. Like to the extent that all of them know about the murder-suicide of her entire family but none of them try to fucking shield her from seeing the suicide ritual. Not even the guys who know damn well what it is going into it!

The fact that they’re all anthropology majors and they go into it with a sense of cold detachment and an insistence on cultural relativism (or utter obliviousness) and it makes them total assholes wasn’t lost on me and I’m glad that someone went into detail: https://slate.com/culture/2019/07/midsommar-graduate-students-villains-ari-aster.html 

The bros say something about him dumping her and finding somebody who “actually likes sex” and there’s a lot of interpretations to that, none of which are less than horrible. Like does he try to pressure her into doing stuff she doesn’t want to? Probably! Like whether she has emotional or physical sexual dysfunction isn’t discussed and that’s kind of brilliant because even if she does have issues it’s not her fault at all and the dudes are g a r b a g e for even suggesting it.

The cute friendly Swedish dude (Pelle) who was the only one to be kind to Dani at all was actually the worst manipulator of all! He’s totally luring her in! He’s love-bombing and manipulating her! He literally “draws” her in. He does some forced-teaming shared-trauma bullshit. I gotta say though: I fell for it! I wanted her to dump the guy for him! I’m almost surprised that she didn’t fall for it. I think it’s more due to the fact that she’s traumatized and grieving than anything.

The most disturbing thing about the guy, though, is that I can’t decide if he does all of this because he’s evil or because he’s genuinely a true believer and believes with all his heart that he’s doing good things. That will haunt me forever tbh. Just... always watch out for guys who want to “save” you. They are the scariest fucking abusers.

The whole cult is love-bombing her, actually. The whole film is like Cult Tactics 101. They find a vulnerable young woman who’s lost everything. She doesn’t feel a sense of love and belonging anywhere. She has no support system unless you count her garbage basically-sociopathic-but-aloof boyfriend who really doesn’t count. Pelle hand-selected her because she’s the ideal cult brainwashing candidate. He’s seen firsthand just how much shit she takes from Christian and how she’s constantly falling for his gaslighting and tolerating him mistreating her. I was actually kind of disturbed at how many women I saw online reacting to the cult saying it was empowering or matriarchal. It’s not at all! The first elder we see leading things is female but the ones handling the book and enforcing the rules are men. I can only recall two women elders who do much of anything and they’re both just prominent parts of ceremonies. They’re announcers/performers. They’re definitely complicit but the men are behind the scenes controlling it. And look at the sex ritual! There’s no real emphasis on female pleasure and it’s all being a good little brood mare. It’s a performance. And small babies are kept away from their mothers to be raised communally. They send the mothers away from their babies! Even the May Queen role sucks if you think about it for even a second. The whole “we’re a family” thing is just creepy as hell. There’s even a lot of foreshadowing to it that I missed, like the guy who greets her shaking the mens’ hands but saying “welcome home” to her. Said guy also calls his traditional garb “girly” when Dani compliments it, btw! And of course the division of labor is patriarchal. The clothing is patriarchal too.

The mental health ableism stuff is bad but there’s ableism based on physical disability as well. Arguably it’s supposed to condemn the cult for fetishizing disabled people and promoting incest to deliberately create disabled people but... it still comes across as “look at this deformed kid” and it’s fucked up.

I can’t tell if the movie is trying to show us that the cult is racist or if the movie itself is racist. They kill off the three non-white outsiders pretty quick. Was that classic horror movie “the black guy dies first” bullshit or was that supposed to be like “look, these seemingly peaceful and loving people are xenophobic and racist and there’s a reason why all of them are super duper white despite bringing in outsiders”. Like I came out of the film definitely convinced that it’s no coincidence that the blue-eyed blonde chick gets singled out as special by these people.

It made me really uncomfortable to realize that the sex ritual is technically a rape scene. We get clues that Christian goes into it voluntarily to some extent, sure. When he knows that girl (and she does look like a young girl!) is trying to seduce him we don’t really see his reaction but he doesn’t seem to refuse outright. He seems ambivalent until he's offered the drugs but then he hears that they’ll make him lose his inhibitions, looks at the girl, and gulps the liquid. He saw it as an excuse to get away with cheating and he took it. But that doesn’t change the fact that he’s drugged when he actually agrees to the sex. He’s tripping the whole time. He’s being pressured and prodded and even literally physically manipulated. He’s out of it. The girl seems kind of out of it too. It’s really fucked up. But like it’s so weird and you’re so mad at him for everything shitty he’s done to Dani that you’re just like what?! But when you think about the fact that he’s drugged and you see the way he’s horrified after he realizes what he’s done... it’s horrific. He was violated.

I like that we see just how viscerally traumatic it is to be cheated on. Dani vomits, collapses and wails. And our sympathies are with her.

The cultists imitation of their members’ suffering is actually deeply disturbing and a huge aspect of the love-bombing thing, especially for Dani. She goes from being barely held by her expressionless piece-of-shit boyfriend while she wails to having a whole bunch of women replicate and act out her suffering. They do this too at the botched suicide and the final scene. They even kind of do it when she fails to eat the fish. It kind of looks communal and empathetic but it’s a feigned empathy. It’s another way that people in the cult lose their own personal identities. Nothing is yours there! Not even your suffering is yours.

To be honest... I went to see this film ‘cause a lot of the reactions to it were women gleefully enjoying seeing a shitty boyfriend suffer a horrible fate. I’m always down for misandry and cinematography! BUT... this was just excessive. The boyfriend is a total bastard. He did kinda need to die tbh. But he basically gets tortured to death. It’s made pretty explicitly clear that it’s horrific. They make no effort to mercy kill him like they did to the elderly guy whose jump failed to kill him. And like... the actor even gets it. The guy’s a scumbag and he doesn’t give a shit about anyone but himself. He even backstabs Chidi From The Good Place! But what happened to him is just awful.

The director and the lead actor actually disagree about the ending! Ari Aster says that Dani knows what she’s doing when she condemns Christian to die. Florence Pugh says she’s out of it.

I say it doesn’t actually matter whether Dani chose to kill Christian or not or what her motive was. Honestly it might have been a mercy killing given the state that he was in! Like maybe it was revenge for her and maybe the cult did it to make her feel empowered but it sucks being forced to choose who lives and dies. It sucks that some creepy cultist basically stole her man. It’s the whole “a pedestal is the same as a cage” thing for sure.

Last thing I can think of for now: I’m very surprised and more than a little distressed at all the people--especially women--who see this as a happy ending for Dani. Sure, it’s kind of a dark fairy tale revenge fantasy. But she’s objectively worse off than she is at the beginning of the film! She’s brainwashed and trapped! Like... I forgot where I read this now but basically Aster says that she goes from with one gaslighter to being with an entire cult of gaslighters! What do you think is gonna happen to her in the future?! She’s gonna have to live with her dead boyfriend’s baby that he had with some rando chick if that fertility ritual worked! She’s gonna have to live in a shitty commune. She’s gonna have PTSD 5ever from everything that happened. It’s honestly a tragic and horrible ending.

I’m... still processing this. I know I’m gonna end up adding to this. Feel free to chime in and discuss it with me! This movie was just Intense. BONUS LINKSPAM: Good Takes And Shit!

https://www.cinemablend.com/news/2474518/jordan-peele-says-midsommar-has-the-most-atrociously-disturbing-imagery-hes-ever-seen

https://themuse.jezebel.com/boy-problems-whos-got-em-midsommar-does-1835878652

https://www.buzzfeednews.com/article/alisonwillmore/midsommar-ari-aster-florence-pugh

https://www.vulture.com/2019/07/the-end-of-midsommar-ari-asters-last-minutes-explained.html

https://www.vulture.com/2019/07/the-end-of-midsommar-ari-asters-last-minutes-explained.html

https://www.npr.org/2019/07/03/738422258/midsommar-shines-a-solstice-nightmare-unfolds-in-broad-daylight

EDIT: Also!!! This film?! Somehow is a comedy! It’s funny as fuck and I’m definitely going to hell for laughing!

[sasslightertm-a]

ooookay, so, some bullshit™ happened earlier this past week and I’m annoyed and pissed. incoming rant/vent under the cut (with screenshots used by permission).

As most of you who have been following me long enough probably know by now, there is a Charmed Discord server and I was in it for a while until I left in early January 2019, for reasons that will be discussed later. The main mod runs a few Charmed rp blogs here on Tumblr, we did have a few threads planned out together, and eventually after I left the Discord server it got to a point where I felt uncomfortable seeing her posts on my dash so I quietly unfollowed and deleted our thread I’d had in my drafts (which had been sitting there for months by this point anyway because I am slow af). Shortly after I unfollwed her, she unfollowed me without so much a message of “Would you be interested in continuing any threads?”.

This mod, while I was in the server, also created a venting/ranting group Google doc against another Charmed roleplayer who has been around for years and had been in the server as well but also left for much the same reasons I later did (namely, feeling unwelcome within the server). (The Google doc has since been deleted, I believe.)

Which brings me to the main point of this post. One of my close friends/mutuals noticed this mod and the roleplayer starting to interact again when both of them had unfollowed each other for months beforehand after the mod decided this roleplayer was Toxic™.

Uh-huh, sure, I find it very hard to believe you told her about the call-out Google doc and everything in it and she was perfectly understanding about it. I also have yet to hear an apology at all from this mun when 1) the most we would do is talk OOC anyway; 2) my Chris and Bilie were constantly ignored despite me showing interest in some of her wishlist ideas; and 3) any threads we did have would only get two replies in if I was lucky and were then dropped. So I unfollowed ages ago and moved on with other mutuals, and at this point it’s honestly not worth it.

And no, sorry, the server was not inactive when I left it back in early/mid January. Everyone was either in the general, headcanons, or venting channels And yes, any time anyone responded to me it was because I or my friend had said something they wanted to argue with or turn into a headcanon about their own next-generation muses. Also? For all y’all would squee over white US-American YouTuber cover artists or Korean boybands (despite none of you speaking a word of Korean), or the mod occasionally slipping into Arabic and then translating when one of us would ‘???’, the instant I try and share a cover by an amazing Turkish musical-theater singer who speaks German and does German-language musicals (said cover was in English, by the way), or the instant I would talk about something I learned in one of my German classes (despite most of my ancestry being, y’know, German [and for the record, said German ancestors came over to the States in the 1800s, so don’t even go there])... dead silence. 

1) oh my gods I’m howling. Thanks for admitting most of the people in the server hate me just because they found my fanfiction and that I like to write dark-themed fics and smut. Out of curiosity, was it one of my FF.net accounts (my main, my Charmed-fic-centric one, or my dark!AU Tenth Doctor-fic-centric one) or was it my AO3? (Also way to go for basically admitting that yup, you’re all a bunch of antis and really be drinking the evangelical fundamentalist Christian purity culture Kool-Aid.)

and btw, saying “complete transparency?” like that is just code for “I’m about to be a petty bitch and you’re not going to want to hear it, but too late.”

also, what, like none of you have ever wanted to write kinky smutty fanfic just because it’s fun and lets you work out various fantasies that may or may not be inherently transgressive? as far as I’m aware I was one of maybe two other people in that server who identify as asexual so don’t even try and say any of youse are sex-repulsed aces.

my smutfic isn’t even that kinky, but go off, I guess

tbh they also probably hate me bc I called them out over their misuse of the word “pedophilia” in regards to this one particular scene in a teen drama TV show between fictional teenage characters being portrayed by adult actors that airs on a network aiming for a 18 to 49-year-old demographic, and the mod and I would disagree over various things concerning US-American Wicca, but hey, it’s easier to just go after my fanfiction and say they hate me because of the fanfics, right?

speaking of that scene they were so up-in-arms about, don’t even try and tell me real-life allosexual teenagers are not horny and don’t have sex with other teenagers, because coming from a state with one of the highest rates of teen pregnancy (where more often than not both would-be parents are teenagers of or around the same age), I will not believe you

like, seriously, do NONE of you remember ever being horny and hormonal as a teenager, or...? 

2) Stop trying to make this an argument that needs to be won, because it isn’t. Also? By the time I left the Charmed Discord server didn’t even feel like a Charmed server anyway, so. There’s that.

3) My friend is right and she should say it.

A few things here: 

How does any of that sound accusatory when it’s true and my friend calmly laying out how she felt about the situation??

Again, stop trying to make this into an argument or personal attack because it isn’t. And not every single conversation is a debate that needs to be won.

“I was half joking”, uh-huh, yeah, riiiiight. Also? How is it any of your business how she decides to run her blog and curtail it so she feels safe on her own dash??? Especially when you don’t even follow or interact with her anymore?? Hell, I softblock people myself who are either inactive and just taking up my follower account, or are personal/fandom blogs who I just don’t want interacting with me. And if you follow me but don’t make any motion to interact, then yeah I’m probably going to softblock you too after posting a heads-up that I’ll be cleaning out my follower count.

And the best part??? Immediately after all this the mod/mun made a post on her blog saying how she doesn’t put up with passive-aggressiveness or manipulation. How the fuck is my friend/mutual being passive-aggressive or manipulative???? 

I’m sorry, but no, you do not get to do that. I see what you did there, and it is not okay. And I am glad I don’t have to deal with any of this mun’s bullshit anymore, or most of the people in the server, apparently. They blocked me solely because they found my kinky darkfic? Fine, great, it’s not like any of them ever interacted with any of my muses anyway and I don’t want to deal with them either. (But also... I made it clear on the server that I also write a dark eldritch!AU Tenth Doctor from Doctor Who and they all knew I have a sideblog for the canon evil version of Chris Halliwell so how exactly was it a surprise that I like writing fanfiction with darker themes and grey areas?)

Anyway, no, that language used on my friend was not called for at all. Neither was trying to make her out to be the aggressor when anyone who’s chatted with her OOC for long enough knows that even doing this much is hard emotionally for her. This was also not an argument that absolutely had to be won so quit trying to turn everything into an argument to make yourself look better. And ooh, boy, tone policing on top of that. That last response was classic “I know you’re right but I don’t want to admit it so I’m just gonna say something to make myself look like I came out on top.”

Nah. 

There’s the door. Make sure it hits you on the way out.

[alixismix]

>Interesting that our country seems to have the worst gun violence yet Australia doesn't Canada doesn't United Kingdom doesn't Norway doesn't New Zealand doesn't. So how are we different that we can't control this interesting.

>Australia, Canada, UK, and Norway (idk about new Zealand considering its population) is nowhere near Americas numbers. With what I mentioned (population) and other cultural factors in this argument, their main issue, although not with guns, definitely stems from domestic terrorism, to government control. All thanks to the removal of their firearms of course.

>So I guess we will go ahead with thoughts and prayers every time an innocent child is blown apart at least that's what I'm getting from the return posts you are okay with children being torn apart.

>nice. Yeah instead of respecting the deaths or the ppl who are traumatized by them you're using them as a ploy to push your fear mongering. Yes I am a Christian that encourages and welcomes prayers, but that school was already a gun free zone, what more do you want??

>how many cops and law enforcement were at the school Ulvade they had plenty of guns how many were available to take that gunman down.

Cops take bad guys down.

You ppl bitch.

Cops don't do shit.

You ppl bitch.

Cops exist.

You ppl bitch.

>Look, Ulvade was a complete dog shit situation with everyone involved it shouldn't have happened and those cops should be flogged for the lack of action, especially the one with the wife. Fuck them, fuck the parents.

Further more if you actually took ten minutes to research, you can actually find evidence of corruption at play. From the cops taking their sweet time, knowing of the shooter and even letting him shoot up a retirement home across from the school, to the DEMOCRATIC election that took place a week later (on the topic of gun control no less).

All of it was foul play, and if cops aren't going to do their jobs to "serve and protect" isn't that grounds to get a gun to protect my kids? The cop won't and death is not an option for me or my kids.

I'm going to go easy on you for this one tho and cut you some slack since Ulvade literally was talked about for a day or two, and then was dropped. So nobody really knows much of what happened and most of everything dropped it as opposed to a few YouTubers bringing it up a blimp of the year.

>Has Robin Williams said guns with people don't kill people apes with guns kill people.

>Are you going to disprove him? No? Oh ok.

>When all the other civilized Nations have not the kind of death statistics that we have with guns something is wrong.

>yeah guys, like Canada. Where they have free healthcare and free dental and LGBT rep and black ppl and-

-sorry for lack of pixels.

Individual freedoms are definitely a high cost in America, but I would rather take care and look after myself as opposed to the government giving and taking shit from me.

(note: same dude to suggest that cops are incompetent btw)

>And again what people are saying from the post I have reviewed is that you are okay with a child's had exploding has an AK-47 bullet slams into their head splattering their brains on the wall with her blood as an adhesive. That's what you're saying right?

Why and how can you be so casual about talking about kids getting their heads exploded? That's sus.

Anyways-

"a true AK-47 has a fully automatic setting

which is illegal in the United States."

-google.

Criminals breaking the laws. Shocker.

I really have nothing else to add here that I didn't already say. Michael, I do not hate or disrespect your takes, in fact I hope this can open a discussion. You obviously come from a frustrated and scared/traumatized place that just wants the agony to end, even temporarily. I do too. I get it. However I think you're definitely ill informed about the topic at hand. Obviously you can still be anti gun and pro gun free areas, but I also think looking at actual stats could help you better understand the argument and situations a little better. How?

Consider the fact that more gun related deaths are of suicides and not homicides.

Like, instead of going on the ppl who use guns responsibly, share mental health resources and other stuff like that. Just my two cents tho.

Interesting that our country seems to have the worst gun violence yet Australia doesn't Canada doesn't United Kingdom doesn't Norway doesn't New Zealand doesn't. So how are we different that we can't control this interesting. So I guess we will go ahead with thoughts and prayers every time an innocent child is blown apart at least that's what I'm getting from the return posts you are okay with children being torn apart. How many cops and law enforcement were at the school Ulvade they had plenty of guns how many were available to take that gunman down.

Has Robin Williams said guns with people don't kill people apes with guns kill people

When all the other civilized Nations have not the kind of death statistics that we have with guns something is wrong.

And again what people are saying from the post I have reviewed is that you are okay with a child's had exploding has an AK-47 bullet slams into their head splattering their brains on the wall with her blood as an adhesive. That's what you're saying right?

[insomniamamma]

YAY! IT STARTS!!! HALLOWEEN ASKS 🎃

Okay okay-

Afraid

Broomstick

Ghost

💚

Afraid: what’s something you are no longer scared of?

Dragonflies. I used to be absolutely terrified of them. I would see them just flying around outside and dive for cover. I don't know why they used to scare me so bad. Probably because they are Very Large Bugs. I'm more or less okay with them now, as long as I'm not in an enclosed space with one. My son likes to remind me about meganeura (a prehistoric dragonfly the size of a goddamn eagle) every chance he gets. Because he is a menace.

Broomstick: what’s your favourite chore?

Cooking. I usually cook a large, leftover heavy meal about once a week. Thankfully my fellas are just fine with leftovers. I really enjoy the process. I find cooking very soothing, and then there's the satisfaction of knowing the people I care most about are eating good scarfable (my son's word) food.

Ghost: have you had a supernatural encounter?

Yes. I'll preface this by saying that I am not a particularly religious person. I consider myself culturally christian (United Methodist to be specific.) but as for hard-felt beliefs? I'm not really here nor there. Now this particular thing happened almost 20 years ago. My best friend growing up gave me the first set of rosary beads he was ever given. He was a recovering catholic, but even so I knew it was a very important thing he was giving me. A little piece of his past for me to watch over. I can't remember the exact reason, but I needed to put my hands on those rosary beads and I could not find them. I dug through everything and they just weren't anywhere. There was a hill up behind the apartment complex (this was in california BTW. if you've read my Nico fics you can imagine how well that all went) and I would go up there sometimes when I was feeling overwhelmed so no one could look at me. I wasn't even really praying, i was just trying to get a handle on myself and I heard a voice say "Look in the garage." When I say I heard a voice, it was not some sort of intuition or knowing. It was an actual physical voice. Like someone talking right next to my ear. There was no real emotion to it. It was like a teacher giving math instructions. And sure enough, I went back down and looked in the garage and those rosary beads were wrapped up in a twist of tissue paper with some of my other craft stuff. This was twenty years and some change ago and I still don't know what exactly to make of it.

thank you for the ask, Hazel  ❤️ Love you, lady 💚

halloween asks

[groundramon]

I don’t really know how to word this without immediately knowing that tumblr could accuse me of a fuckton of different buzzwords, but I’m going to try to anyways - and hopefully if any hyper-woke people find me, they’ll tell me how I should better word myself in the future instead of immediately calling me an abuse apologist or some shit.

But anyways, here’s a hot take - people of minority groups can be abusers.  Sometimes, they can abuse people for their minority status.  Sometimes, people lie about sexual assault.  Sometimes, people use their mental health or identity or race or whatever as an excuse for being a despicable human being.  How do I know?  Because I’ve had it happen to me, over and over and over.

I am: a trans, LGBT+, mentally disabled + ill, DFAB person.  I am also: a white, able-bodied fuckboy who lives in California, one of the most progressive states in the country, even in its conservative areas.  I am on both sides of the spectrum, and the times when I see minority statuses being abused are usually from the groups that I’m a minority of.

For example, I was harassed (and arguably sexually abused, however because I couldn’t find those comments that could’ve made him face legal consequences for all he’s done, I struggle to say that this is the case - additionally, I was never his target, just my art) by an autistic man online when I was younger.  It’s the reason why I can’t interact with the HT/TY/D fandom and why I won’t be seeing the third movie (keep in mind this happened right before the second movie, and I went to see that one because it legitimately interested me - this one seems heterosexual AND reminds me of my abuser’s dragon OC, which he guilt tripped me into drawing for him as his form of porn).  He ruined an entire franchise for me because he harassed me so badly.  He guilt tripped me in about how hard it was being autistic (and threw in some comments about how teens think they have it “so hard with their anxiety and depression” when “they really have no idea”, to a teenager struggling with identifying anxiety and depression - i didn’t believe that bullcrap but I did fall for his autism sob story) and convinced me to do art trades with him which were just redraws of my own stuff, and he’d repeatedly spam me and yell at me and guilt trip me to finish his work if I so much as read his note without responding.  He drained my motivation for DeviantArt along with my love of a franchise.  This man was also a serial harasser/spammer, he did this to MANY people, including other minors.  I wasn’t a specific target - honestly, I think I was pretty low on his priority list, considering he only tried to come back a few times.  The kicker?  I’m pretty sure I’m autistic, even though I had no idea back then.  At least, I sure do have a lot of symptoms of autism now that I look back.

Not good enough for you?  Okay.  How about the fact that a relative of mine tried to convince my aunt that she (my aunt, not the relative) was sexually abused by my paternal grandfather as a child, sending my aunt into a mental breakdown because she couldn’t remember anything like that and had no idea?  My aunt is the weak link in our family, she’s adopted and felt othered for it, and lived away from the rest of our family for a long time.  She recently started getting involved and just happened to be attacked by a known financial and mental abuser in our extended family right when she started getting back involved.  I’m thankful that my dad and my uncles were able to help her get a better picture of her father.  Keep in mind that I don’t have a positive image of my paternal grandfather, because he smoked and gave my dad + uncle health problems due to it - and I personally consider that an accidental form of child abuse, in a way.  But he was NOT a fucking incestual pedophile.  It infuriated me to hear that, despite never meeting him, and having a negative overall impression of him.

How about another?  My step-step-grandmother (long story) has accused my deceased uncle of being a money-hungry monster and stealing all of her rightful money after his father/her husband died.  We’re in a court case to get the inheritance we deserve from her now, but she only ever brought this up AFTER he passed away.  When informed about his dead, she bitched about how he made her loose money, and how she was struggling despite using up all of my mom’s inheritance (from her step-father AND her mother).  Because you know, that’s what you do when someone dies.  My uncle was the only uncle on my mom’s side to make it to my birthdays, his family gave my mom and I a place to stay when we ended up stranded down south due to a bad head injury my dad got (also long story) and we didn’t have time to make it back home and we didn’t want to just leave my dad there.  My uncle was probably the nicest, kindest family member I had.  His funeral was the first funeral I went to, and there were TONS of people.  He was a Christian man who lived by true Christian values, and plenty of people testified this at his funeral.  People I’d never even met before.  This old woman accused him of stealing her money (where did it go?? his wife is fucking broke now that he’s gone!), never caring enough to visit her, ect.  This old woman, who never even responded to my birthday invitations let alone came, who never made any attempt to make a mutual outreach to us.  She expected us to do all the work, and when we decided it wasn’t worth her ignoring and rejecting, we stopped.  And then she accused us of abandoning her.  This is an old woman, but she’s still an evil person - or an evil person who is now just a shell of evil, unable to even remember a time when she didn’t believe these lies that she told herself.

And don’t get me started on how this applies to ace discourse.  Heaven forbid I compare the ace/aro experience to another LGBT experience!  It’s only okay if I compare it to the straight experience (which i do btw, because i KNOW we benefit from homophobia unless we’re also sga) even though it has 99% more in common with the LGBP experience than the straight experience.  This isn’t an inclusionist vs exclusionist thing - this is just COMPARISONS.  It’s like saying murkrow looks like a crow - like yeah, no shit sherlock!! doesn’t mean murkrow is just the same as a real life fucking crow!!!  And god, haven forbid you talk about real aphobia and how it affects real aspec people.  Immediately every allo in the area will jump on you about how that’s just misogyny and rape culture and blah blah blah.  Then what about when it happens to men?  What about when it happens to nonbinary people?  What about when it has literally nothing to do with gender or being forced to have sex, and is just a constant feeling of being othered and excluded?  Forgotten and not believed?  Constantly doubted that your experience is real?  And then to be told that the very bigotry you suffered was just a part of a bigger issue, instead of specifically about a part of your identity....bullshit.  There IS overlap in certain social issues.  Race affects how homophobia and transphobia affects a person deeply.  Same with misogyny and race.  So of course there’s overlap.  But to say that aphobia doesn’t exist, I’m sorry - I don’t say this lightly, but that’s unconscious gaslighting. (there is no better term than that - believe me, I looked.  My point is that I don’t believe it’s intentional, but LGBP people, trans or not - you NEED to stop doing this.  You ARE unconciously gaslighting aces and aros.  This is not anecdotal, there are statistics and you refuse to believe them, despite pointing at just as credible statistics to prove your own points.  You say we can’t use anecdotal evidence, but then go on to use it yourself.  Intentional or not, you need to quit it.)

I really don’t want to talk about how race and this stuff intertwine because I really don’t have any experience with that as a white person.  All I know is that groups of POC can be bigoted towards other groups of POC, and they can even be bigoted towards people of their own race.

Which leads me to the most important part of this post: The fact that minorities can abuse majority groups, even if its on the basis of their minority group, does NOT mean that minority groups are not oppressed.

Just because a few women lie about being raped, doesn’t mean that all women who say they were raped are lying.  Just because an autistic person abused me, doesn’t mean that all autistic/mentally disabled people and mentally ill people are scary.  Just because aphobia is real doesn’t mean that non-SGA aces and aros don’t benefit from homophobia to a certain degree.  Just because homophobia kills doesn’t mean that aphobia isn’t just as real.  Just because the LGBT community has a habit of gaslighting victims of aphobia doesn’t mean that the LGBT community oppresses the aspec community.  Just because POC can discriminate against or even hold systemic power over another POC doesn’t mean that they aren’t both oppressed by white people.

Abuse is not oppression.  Oppression is a repeated, prolonged offense of cruel and unjust control.  None of my anecdotals “prove” that oppression for these groups isn’t real.  Because I’m part of these groups, and it’s my opinion that it IS real.  But my anecdotals are also still valid.  It is not problematic to point out when someone uses their minority status to abuse and manipulate others.  It is not problematic to call bigoted, cruel mentally disabled people problematic for being manipulative and abusive.  Their disability is not an excuse.  Their identity is not an excuse.  Their experience may be a reason, but not an excuse.  But neither is your experience.  Let people talk about their individual experiences AND the wider issues of oppression as a whole.  They don’t have to be opposite faces of the same coin, and it’s sad that we act like they do.

[lordmomourmomoness]

this is just a personal rant i need to express uh right so i have somewhat of a personal philosophy when it comes to performing or more specifically being hired to perform. like? idk how to say this without coming across like an asshole but i don’t like being invited (forced) to perform for funerals & weddings & parties. & maybe this just makes me a purist & it’s hard to explain this to people who don’t actively attend church or even know what a worship set is or what worship culture is lol. like when i sing ? it’s like we’re all worshipping together & we’re all connected & i just happen to be on a stage u know ? & that’s how it should be. like we’re all focusing on god rn it’s not about me or you or anyone else in this room rn it’s about worship.

& here it’s hard to explain or for you to get context bc if you haven’t experienced true, spirit-filled worship it’s just not gonna compute u know bc there’s no basis for u to relate to & btw this is not some “my religion is better than urs” bullshit. im just saying that christian worship culture is such a all-encompassing & prominent part of who i am and the people im surrounded by but that realm also simply doesn’t exist to some people u know?

so anyways with worship, our aim is this very real out-of-body experience that we call “anointing” and it’s not magic it’s not some quantifiable substance i stick in back pocket before i get onstage. u have to connect to god u have to open up & let all this life crap fall away & rly truly focus on god u know? and church services u know, everyone is here simply for that. that’s literally the reason we’re all here. worship & connection & revelation & fellowship. & playing diff events? we’re not here for that u know? it’s like a party or some shit & im like u want us to do what ? play music rn ? like a secular band ? like ???

& this doesn’t happen often i swear (& im usually good at handling it & it doesn’t happen within my church family but always fkn new people idek why them) but it’s just something i have a big personal issue with. & i am in no way saying that worship only occurs in church bc ofc not. how many dinner parties & hangouts & fkn hikes have turned into spontaneous worship sessions ? so many. (like that’s just what happens when at any given time, there’s a piano or a guitar & literally everyone in my family & close adult circle is musician or singer) it just irks me when someone hands me a schedule & goes “u play here & then here’s the other event shit & then imma need another song from u” im like “what song?” & they go “whatever u want just some noise;)” like okay fuck you:))

man idek know like maybe i am a purist abt this (no way im the only who feels like this too tho bc bethel & maverick city prolly feel this too) but i rly think worship is sacred & not fkn background noise u know ??? like i cannot even explain the power of the emotions i feel in worship. there’s nothing to compare it to okay. it’s like that insane slaphappy connectedness that you get a concert of an artist u love where everyone is singing the same words & it’s absolutely euphoric ? it’s like that but infinitely more stunning. like don’t even get me started on worship concerts.

so yeah im just thinking about this today bc i had to play a solo set for a funeral of some guy i think i met twice? & okay im not being a bitch bc im not rly annoyed by this i swear bc his widow is so sweet & i did say yes when she asked me & im bad at saying no to stuff when people CATCH ME OFF GUARD. & maybe it’s just bc i had to play for such a somewhat large audience. (when i say big audience, i mean an american audience of a couple hundred people, in India we play like thousands of people shows bc it’s a cultural relativism buddies) like im a little out of practice with this size bc with COVID we’ve been pretty split on sundays between in-person attendees & online live-stream attendees & maybe this is just my personal insecurities of having to play a solo set for the first time in a while & also this is literally strangers like a room of hundreds of strangers (im literally 1 of five brown people in this room) &

idek man its different performing a high-energy set by yourself bc u can’t bounce off other peoples energies ? like band mates? that’s RIDE OR DIE buddies right there we’re right as fuck it’s literally family so just being alone im like “i hate my life rn” & man idek & it wasn’t bad by any means solid 10 i stuck the landing & all that shit. it’s just weird not being able to connect to the audience u know ?

sry this was SO MUCH i’ve just been struggling with finding my place as a worship leader & yeah:)) bye