#i am being able to finish my projects much better because of them

[thelunaticghost]

slimes have changed me as a person i need 10 of these

[saltnsugarbear]

Lip with “Fuck, wait — shit. Mm— fuck. Wh-where did you learn to do that?” “Well, the noises you make are a pretty good indication of how you like it.” “…God you sound so fucking cocky right now and it’s turning me on even more.” 

so like on the low i ate this up

word count: 1.0k

content warnings: KAREN SLANDER IM SO SORRY (I don't like her but I hate slut shaming more) they don't enthusiastically consent but they're both into it I'm sorry 😔, so ig dubcon, oral (m!receiving) (don't ask for this ever again), Lip is kind of mean (the voices olive got to me on that one)

side note: don't expect any bj fics again cause I hate the idea of giving men head SORRY also I like triggered my own life apocalypse (got sick at work, power went out, etc)

come celebrate!

One of Lip's favorite things about you is your competitive nature. Not that he'd ever say that out loud, but it's one of the things that endeared him to you.

It made him like pushing your buttons even more.

So complaining while you actually work on your group project is the perfect way to annoy you today. However you've stopped paying him any mind, about three minutes into his griping. So he tries a new approach.

Bringing up his most recent conquests. So obviously that means he feels the need to mention Karen.

And the fact that instead of being tutored, she gave Lip head instead. The story makes you roll your eyes, shaking your head when he comments that it's probably the best blowjob he's ever gotten.

"It could not have been that good.." You scoff, trying to focus on finishing the sentence you're writing. "Actually, I take that back. Given how big of a slut she is, she's probably had plenty of practice."

"Oh fuck you-" Lip starts.

"Am I wrong?" You challenge him quickly, glaring up from your page.

"You're just pissed off you're not getting any." He sneers. You roll your eyes, you're not having this conversation with him.

Lip takes your silence as agreement, snickering lightly. "No wonder you're so uptight, you're not getting laid."

You have to bite your tongue to keep from retorting. He's fucking insufferable.

"Everything makes so much more sense now. Because I kept asking myself, y'know, why you're such a bitch. But it makes sense now, you're not getting away so you need to take your frustrations out another way."

"You're such a fucking asshole, Gallagher. You don't know shit about who I'm fucking." You snap at him, putting your pen down none too gently.

"Right, like anyone would be able to fuck you. Probably too fucking tight up there, can't even get a finger in you." Lip's look is gloating, like he's won some verbal sparring match.

You don't know why you're moving. Pushing out of your chair and tugging Lip's back. Lip sputters at the abruptness of your yanking, arms flying out for balance. Once there's enough space for you, you quickly step in between his legs before dropping down to your knees.

You're a little surprised at the small tent in Lip's slacks already, scoffing after you piece it together. "You get off on the sound of your own voice?"

"What? No. What are you-" You cut Lip's questioning off quickly, pushing yourself up to rest on your toes so you can easily rest your arm on his thigh as you press your palm against his half hard dick. Lip's words are muddled as you bully him through the fabric, fighting himself for some composure.

With one last squeeze, you bring both of your hands to his hips, pulling him forward until he's sitting at the very edge. You don't miss how he inhales sharply at your rough handling.

Once he's positioned better, you sit flat on your feet before looking up at him through your lashes and leaning forward, licking at his erection through his slacks. Lip groans as you continue to mouth at his cock, head falling back as you suck softly around the fabric.

Once you're satisfied with the wet patch you've made in his pants, you bring your hands to unbutton and unzip them before tugging them down slightly. Lip helps you out by lifting his hips up, letting drag them down past his knees. Your saliva bled through his pants, dampening his boxers where you had been teasing him.

Taking your time, you go back to mouthing at his erection. You can hear him shifting above you, glancing up to see him bring his hands around. Lip's hands are pushy as they hold the back of your head.

"Uh-uh.." You pull away from his bulge, catching his wrists before leaning forward and tucking them behind his back. "Those stay there."

"Fuck..." Lip mutters.

"Lift." You tap his hips as you curl your fingers under the waistband of his boxers. Lip is a quick listener, lifting his hips up so you can tug his boxers down to his pants. He breathes out heavily when his cock springs free, hitting his stomach.

You're quick to take him in your mouth, sliding your tongue along the underneath of his length. There's a sense of pride as Lip struggles to form any words, the only things leaving his mouth a mix of whines and groans.

"Fuck, wait- shit-" Lip grunts as you sink back down to the base, glancing up at him with your nose brushing against his happy trail. "Mm- fuck. Wh-where did you learn to do that?"

You hum around his length, feeling how he twitches in your mouth before pulling all the way off.

"Well, the noises you're making are a pretty good indication of how you like it." You grin up at him, bringing your hand to wrap around the base of his cock.

"...God you sound so fucking cocky right now and it's turning me on even more." Lip's eyes are lidded as he looks down at you, watching as you slowly jerk him off. You roll your eyes at him, leaning back towards his cock.

"I liked you better when you could barely speak," you tell him before leaning forward and wrapping your lips around the head of him.

"Fuu- ughh.." Lip grunts as you suckle at his head. His hips buck up into your mouth, pushing himself farther in. You hum sharply, taking your hands away from his base and pushing back against his hips. Lip breathes heavily as you keep his hips in place, flicking your tongue over the slit before pressing gently at the underside of his head.

"Wait-" Lip chokes out, hips bucking up again. "Shit, shit- fuck-"

Lip's release is thick on your tongue and you're quick to open your mouth, letting him watch as his cum coats your tongue. Doing such makes Lip swear, another rope covering your tongue. You pull away from him, sticking your tongue out for him to see all of his release before making a show of swallowing it.

"Still think she gave you the best blowjob of your life?"

[greenplumbboblover]

[WIP] TS3 UI "Krystal"

I figured it would be cool to finally publicly share what I've been working on behind the scenes, as well as some mockups!

A few of you on Patreon or Discord may have already seen sneak peeks/given feedback. I kept things quiet because I wasn’t sure I’d even do it in the first place as a next modding project, and I didn’t want to let anyone down.

Luckily, @lazyduchess’s Monopatcher made the job ten times easier. The biggest hurdle was that I would've had to make a core mod to override UI code (I’m normally anti–core mod), but the patcher solved that and let me push ahead.

(Psst, if you're looking at seeing the mockups bigger, I also posted this post on my site: Simblr.cc 😉)

Creating the Mockups

Fun fact: I actually have a degree in UI/UX design! (for websites) While principles like “How wide should this padding be?” or “Which colors send the right signal to the user?”—game UI is a whole different beast.😬

Main Menu

I started with the main menu:

Cut the SimPoints clutter and the “Buy TS4!” banner—after a decade, we get it exists 😉.

Grouped items into clean blocks

Added a text-free “Create New Family” icon

Swapped lot thumbnails for family shots (still baffled by EA’s original choice).

Dropped an options gear in the bottom-left; might label it if it’s too subtle.

Different backgrounds: one solid blue, one closer to the classic gradient.

A lil' sneek peek of where I'm at:

She's not finished, but it's definitely getting there! 😉

Load Screen

Not much has changed here! It's just less... busy I suppose, lol!

2 Different backgrounds to choose from

Moved the Game Tips to the bottom, so the main focus stays on that loading bar 😉

I also have a third option but I'm strongly leaning towards just having the loading bar as it's the most clear!

Live Mode

The hardest of them all lol. Kudos to EA for figuring that one all out! I really struggled with this one in regards to shape and what to even move around/remove!

I figured, it should be nice to pull really into that glassmorphism I've been using over the Mockups! Now I do realise that it can hamper user experience in the sense of not being able to read anything. But these are pictures! So that should be all fine and dandy.

The active item in the queue will now be more "visible". The queued item however, you'll see look a bit more "unactive" compared to what the current version has.

I also completely overhauled the thumbnails for your sims, showing their moods a bit better, and giving the active sim a tiny plumbob! :D

And now the real deal: The control panel! You might notice it's not the whole thing, but I'm still working on that part.

I removed the camera controls from the panel. However, upon feedback, I did hear that it's better to have them as some people are limited in their hand movements on their keyboard and that those controls are really useful. So I will make sure to share 2 versions :)

I also realised I completely forgot the Build/buy mode buttons 😬 So, err, stay tuned for that? lol.

Notifications I really just tidied up :p

I am aware that the space where the text is and the thumbnail is huge, and normally I'd wrap the surrounding text, but apparently in TS3's UI stuff that's practically impossible. Hence that they got this "2 column" effect to them 😉

About releasing the UI:

I'm hoping to release them all in bits and pieces! So first up is the Main Menu (and possibly the Loading screen given it's simplicity).

After that, I hope in my second "update" to release a big portion of Live mode, but that's a bigger task on it's own of course 😉

Any feedback at this point is also completely welcome by the way!

[bluesunss]

Barney meets Snow-white Choi Su-bong x F!Reader April fool's

summary: out of all people to prank on the first of april, you decide to to pick your brother’s best friend. the plan? telling him someone you know likes him. he thinks it’s you, you think he doesn’t know, and somehow funny misunderstandings end up in lifelong storytimes.

warnings: none. short, not proof-read.

a/n: my participation to the Big Bang April challenge is only coming in two days, so here is a filler episode in between. i have sm parts to finish but this an April fool's and we can't miss the date. NOT proofread and very quickly written, I am a tired little akuma

You should’ve known better than to mess with Choi Su-bong. But what could you do? The man was fine. Purple hair, true, a bit suspicious, as your dad called him Barney. It'd make him laugh so much, when Thanos would stay for lunch or dinner, and your father would suddenly say: "Barney, the salt!" and burst into laughter, as you'd bury your face in embarassment.

He was quite tall, too. Deep voice. That aura, rapper aura, that someone a bit famous was at your place and that got your heart racing in excitment. You loved his stage name. 'Thanos.' And his tattoos. And rings. When sometimes, you'd sneak out of your room when you knew he and your brother were watching a movie, and Su-bong would spot you, go to the kitchen and make you a bowl of your fav snacks, before allowing you to snuggle next to them for the rest of the night - going even against your brother's protestations.

Plus, it was so stupid. Last year, at a pool party in his garden, where you were surprisingly invited, he lent you his sweatshirt at the end of the night because it got chilly and you were freezing in your swimsuit. Not to any of the girls. But you.

It was still there, on your desk. It smelled of him. Cologne, fruity - from his vape - and skin-like. Warm.

You hesitated. A lot. But that idea creeped up and took all of your thoughts, that is why it had to be done.

At 8:24 PM, you grabbed nonchalantly your phone and jumped on your bed belly down, swinging your legs and biting your nails. Stupid idea. Stupid crush. Stupid feelings. You typed, heart beating, hesitating for so long. Should you? Should you not? Before even being able to think, you hit send and threw your phone across the bed, grabbing a book and opening it at a random page, heart racing. The words didn't even make sense.

Hey, someone I know likes you.

It was so dumb. He wouldn't even take interest. You had only texted thrice. Once, your brother sent him to pick you up at a party because he was busy with work, and Su-bong needed your address. Second time, he was in America and sent you a pic of a primer you wanted with a thumbs-up. He bought you ten of them, coming back with an eagle cap and a new perfume, and threw them at you with a wink. Damn him.

And third, your birthday. The first year he had ever wished it. Usually, he just told your brother to wish you a happy birthday from him. You turned nineteen, he was twenty-one. He came late with a cake the next day, one in the morning, drenched, as he was back from a tour but wanted to celebrate. Stupid boy. Stupid crush. He also gave you a Barney keychain.

Ting!

Shit. He was NOT supposed to answer. Nope. Nopeeee. You were screwed. Hesitating over throwing your phone from your window, calling a friend, starting a carpet knitting project or just going to sleep to let the answer simmer, your hand instinctively reached for your phone, grabbing it in a flash.

Who?

Your heart calmed down. He was just curious.

Can’t say.

You expected him to leave you on read or spam you with a bunch of question marks. What you didn't expect was the immediate response:

Give me a hint.

Huh. You hadn't thought this far. Plus, he knew most your friends, if not all. They weren't a lot, like five, and he came to your place enough to recognise at least their names.

Someone you see a lot.

My reflection in the mirror?

You snorted. Classic Su-bong.

As if.

Who wouldn't 😌

Don't break your neck carrying that ego.

����😂

What to respond now? Your heart was leaping out of your chest. This wasn't going how you planned. He wasn't confused - he was entertained. And that was dangerous. You needed to make him sweat a little.

You waited. Nothing came. The online title left the screen, and you dropped your phone, disappointed. You felt slightly nauseous and tears prickled your eyes. Why were you so damn emotional? Stupid you.

Getting up, you decided to take a shower to clear your head. You went inside the bathroom in the corridor with only a towel, stripped, and jumped into the burning water. Ahh. Life was great.

Satisfied, you turned off the water after a long time, and put a foot out of the shower, before fully leaving it and closing the steaming sliding-door. Wrapping the towel around your body, you flew to your room to avoid your brother's snarky comments about the state of the bathroom or how long you took, only to come back to buzzing sounds. A lot of them.

Surprised, you grabbed your phone, and your heart made a salto. 16+ messages. 3+ missed calls from Barney🆘

Oh no no no!

You struggled to open your phone with your slick palms, heart beating so fast.

Girl js tell me

Heyyyy

Someone I see a lot… Is it Soojin?

Girl respond

Jina?

Your friend with the blue iphone?

You never realised how much he observed everyone.

Su-bong was annoyingly perceptive. He played around a lot, but you’d seen him pick apart situations with almost unsettling accuracy. There were two friends left. He knew you had a few, your brother would keep teasing you about this.

Wow, you're insistent. All wrong.

Immediately, the phone rang, and, struggling to decline, a drop of water fell from your hair and clicked on accept. You threw the phone with horror. No! It was a facetime!

"Hey I-"

He stopped. You were nowhere in sight.

"Yo, where you at. Heyyy girl imma come to your place."

"NO!"

"What?"

"PLeasE."

Your voice cracked. You ran to the phone and immediately hung up. His voice died.

This was a prank on yourself, ultimately. You crashed out.

Omw

Oh oh. Big mess makes big mistakes.

You stared at the screen, helpless, waiting for a text, for it all to be a prank.

Five minutes passed.

Ten.

You tapped your fingers against your screen, feeling a weird sense of unease. He wasn’t the type to give up easily, and he wasn’t the type to go silent without a reason.

You hesitated, then typed:

Still there? Don't come. Min-ho isn't here.

No answer.

You collapsed on the bed then jumped suddenly, realising you needed to dress. Opening your closet, you groaned. All your shirts were dirty! You ran to your brother's room, stole an oversized one, and went back to your room and took some pants.

Ring!

He came. NEVER again. Never pranking anyone in this universe again. Stressed, you jumped the stairs, arrived at the door, and opened it with a weird grin.

He looked at you, confused, before smirking.

"So? Where's my lover girl at?"

You fiddled with the shirt, avoiding his gaze.

"She's not here. Listen my parents aren't there and Minho has a football match. You should come back another time and-"

"Nah I'm great."

He pushed the door with his manicured fingers, a bag in his arm, and went inside naturally.

"Leaving this here. Some jam from Mom." He put the bag on the counter.

Then, he opened the fridge, grabbed two apples, washed them and threw one at you.

"Come and sit. You need to finish what you started. The legend Thanos isn't much of a patient man."

Trembling, you sat the furthest away from him. His smirk grew bigger, and he chuckled.

"So. Who's that secret admirer?"

You didn't answer, were about to bite in the apple when-

"No hold on! it's poisoned!"

You stared at him, confused, only for him to burst into laughter, cramping up in two. "HAHA! Should've seen your face."

You blushed furiously, put it back on the table and got up. "I'm leaving! This isn't funny!" Your face was a deep-crimson, burning. Did he want to embarass you that much?

Su-bong's eyes softened as he wiped tears from his eyes. As you passed near his spot on the table, he caught your waist and swiftly sat you on his lap so that your back was facing him.

"What... What are you doing?" you breathed nervously.

He approached his face from your ear and murmured.

"You are not the only one who knows how to make an April fool's."

His breath was minty and fruity. Your breath hitched, you squirmed to get up but he kept you pinned on him, tightening his grip on your waist.

"Nah princess. Stay here."

Burying your face in your palms, you felt yourself fall more into his arms as he hugged your frame. It just fit perfectly. It smelled like the sweat-shirt x100. Much better. And his strong arm was encaging you, pinning you to him. Not that you minded, if only your heart would slow down.

"Look at me."

You shook your head, hiding your face.

"Look at me," he repeated.

You shook your head again. However, his fingers slowly went to your face, he removed your hands gently and placed them on your thighs, forcing you to slightly shift on his lap.

"Hey."

He smiled. You smiled weakly.

"Hey..."

And he kissed your cheek.

"I don't know what girl likes me," he said, brushing a strand of hair away from your face. "But I do know what boy likes her."

Your heart beat twice as fast, as you stared at his black eyes with confusion and hope.

"Really? Who?"

But he didn't need to answer. Slowly, you both leaned in, and you tasted those soft lips on yours. Apple-like.

"The apple was poisoned," you murmured.

He smiled against you lips.

"Then we'll both die tonight."

And he kissed you again.

absolutely not proofread as it's just a drabble before sleep. don't hesitate to correct me.

[mytaegiheart]

Sweetest Dream

⟶ pairing: Hoseok x Female Reader

⟶ word count: Almost 2k+ 18+ // mdni

⟶ genre: smut, fluff, fwb to lovers au

⟶ content: idol!Hoseok is just now realizing he's in love with his best friend (you). He needs to tell you before he leaves on his tour for 4 months.

⟶ warnings: explicit sexual content: kissing/making out, groping, unprotected sex (don't do it kids!), markings (hickeys & other bruising), …

↬ a/n: semi-based on "Sweet Dreams" and the completion of his 3 day Seoul concerts.

Day 3 was over and done with. The meet and greet afterwards made him feel like he was flying and he was filled with so much energy, he knew it would take him forever to fall asleep when he got home.

Jin had invited him out for a drink after the concert ended, which he agreed to, if only to try and bleed off the excess energy.

He joined Jin in the car before pulling out his phone to send a text, but he received one instead.

Y/n: Saw the concert. You looked amazing, and so happy.

Hobi: Wish you'd been there in person, would have been 10x better.

Y/n: Maybe next time. :) What are you up to now?

Hobi: Drinks out with Jin and Jonathan.

Y/n: Tell them I said hello. Stay safe. Call me when you get home?

Hobi: I don't know what time that will be.

Y/n: Call me anyway. I don't mind.

Hobi: Okay.

Y/n: <3

Smiling, he put his phone away, noticing Jin grinning at him. “Shut up.”

Jin just laughed like he knew some great secret (he did).

It was indeed late when he arrived home, but he was tired enough that he thought he'd be able to sleep peacefully.

As he walked into his apartment, he was surprised to see the light on in his dining room. Frowning, he went to see what was up.

What surprised him the most was seeing some covered dishes on the table, with balloons and a vase of flowers. There was a card with his name propped up against the vase, which he picked up first. He opened the card and smiled warmly when he recognized your handwriting.

He opened the covers on the dishes and saw they were all his favorites and his heart seemed to swell in his chest.

He checked the time, saw it was well after midnight but decided to send you a text anyway so that you'd see it in the morning when you awoke.

Your Sunshine: Thank you.

He was surprised when he saw three dots pop up, indicating an incoming reply.

Your Hope: You're welcome.

Your Sunshine: Why are you still up?

Your Hope: Work project. I just finished and was heading to bed when you texted.

Your Sunshine: Omg, go to bed!

Your Hope: Lol, I am. Enjoy your dinner.

He set his phone down and went to wash up before eating.

After slipping into a comfy pair of sweats and a hoodie, he put the dishes in the microwave to warm up before sitting down to eat. While doing that, he started browsing his socials, checking out what others were saying about the concerts and liking posts or sharing them on Instagram. But his eyes continuously went to the card, still propped up against the vase.

After eating his fill, he put the leftovers away before cleaning up the kitchen. As he turned out the lights, his eyes returned to the card on the table. Still staring, thoughts churning. You had been in his thoughts more and more as of late and he couldn't understand why.

He didn't realize he had his phone in hand until he heard his manager's voice sleepily ask him what he needed.

“What's my schedule like?”

“Flight leaves Wednesday morning. Your next 2 days are free.”

“Good.”

There was silence for a moment before he heard the man sigh. “You need to be home Tuesday evening to make sure you're packed.”

“I will. No worries.”

“Make sure you tell her how you feel.” Okay that made him pause.

“What?”

“Hobah, you've been dancing around your feelings for her for quite some time. I didn't say anything about your 'arrangement' because I know you so well. You've been in love with her since the day you met.”

You had met at a meet & greet some years before, you being part of the venue staff to make some extra money. He'd been fascinated with you right from the start, always aware of where you were in proximity to him. He had asked for your number after it was over and you impulsively gave it to him.

Somehow your friendship turned into a 'Friends with Benefits' arrangement, but you were the first to fall in love with him. Only he didn't know that as you didn't want to lose his friendship by telling him.

And now, he was realizing that he was in love with you, too.

“Fuck!” he cursed himself.

“Tell her I said hello.” His manager chuckled in replied before ending the call.

Gathering up some toiletries and a change of clothes into his backpack, he locked up his apartment and headed to the garage for his car.

You lived in a small home on the outside of the city and it didn't take him long to get there with the lack of traffic so late at night.

The neighborhood was silent as he pulled into your driveway, killing the engine as he stared up at the house. There were no lights on other than the porch light and he knew you might be asleep, but he had to see you before he left for a few months.

Grabbing his bag, he left his car, swiftly locking it before walking to the front porch. You had given him a spare key some time before and he used that to enter the house on silent feet, removing his shoes before entering.

Locking the door, he glanced around the darkened living room, the only sound the ticking of your grandmother's cuckoo clock hanging over the fireplace mantel. Taking a breath, he turned and headed for the stairs.

His heart was beating hard against his chest as he stepped into the bedroom at the top of the stairs. Eyes already adjusting to the dim lighting, he spotted you immediately in the shadows of your bed. You were curled up in the center, back facing him, deeply asleep. Your soft breathing sounded loud in his ears.

He quietly placed his bag in the chair in the corner before he drew back the blankets behind you and slipped into bed, his arm immediately sliding around your waist to draw you close to his body. The thin strap of your night gown slipped from your shoulder, catching at the crook in your elbow and he took that moment to press tender kisses to your naked back and bare shoulder.

You shifted in your sleep, feeling a warmth around your body and you took a deep inhale, recognizing his scent even in your dreams.

“Hobi.” you whispered sleepily. “What are you doing here?”

He was startled at the whisper of his name from your lips, but he hugged you closer as you rested your hand on his arm.

“I had to come see you before I left for tour.” he whispered in return, not wanting to break up the intimacy of the moment by talking loudly.

“Why?” you asked. He was silent for the longest moment and you thought he'd fallen asleep. Instead, he hugged you tighter and you could feel his lips against your ear.

“I couldn't leave without telling you... I love you.” he whispered. He felt your body tense in his arms and held a breath.

“What?” you returned, eyes snapping open in shock.

“I love you. I'm in love with you. I have been in love with you for so long, I didn't even realize it.”

The last thing you expected this late at night was your best friend in the world blurting out his feelings for you. You had been harboring your own feelings of love for him, you thought you might have been dreaming. You turned in his embrace, meeting his eyes, peering into their depths as if you could see his very soul. And what you saw stunned the breath from you.

“Do you mean that?” you whispered, needing to be sure of what you heard. Instead of answering verbally, he pulled you closer and immediately slotted his heart-shaped lips over yours, pouring every ounce of emotion into the kiss he could manage.

This was real, his feelings were real and you did the only thing you could: gave it right back to him tenfold.

Your mouth opened against his and he wasted no time slipping his tongue inside to tangle with your own, his hands mapping the skin of your back and neck as your fingers tangled in his hair to keep him close.

After some time, the need for air became a necessity and you both drew back, breathing in sync but heavily. He trailed lazy kisses down your jaw, neck and shoulders, whispering his love against your heated skin.

“Stay?” you whispered, eyes falling closed as desire pulled you within its grasp.

“Why?” he wondered, needing to hear the words.

“Because... I love you, too.”

He paused in his kisses, pulling back to stare down at you with desire-ridden eyes. He could see the truth of your words and the smile he gifted you with could have rivaled the sun in its brightness.

He claimed your lips once more, this kiss more passionate than the previous one. He rolled your body beneath his, slotting himself between your legs. You gasped softly as he ground his hard cock against your core, clenching around nothing and wanting to be filled.

The covers got kicked to the end of the bed as he rolled over again until you were on top of him and straddling his lap. He groaned beneath as you ground down on him, grabbing your hips to still your body.

You pulled back from your intense kiss, both of you breathless as you slowly sat up. His eyes pinned you in place, gazing at you with an intensity that made you tremble.

Still staring at him, your hands moved to your shoulders, slowly drawing the thin straps of your gown down your arms, the material pooling in your lap. He stared, swallowing hard.

“Hobi.” you whispered, low and seductive. Something seemed to snap within him as he surged up beneath you, one hand grabbing the back of your neck to pull you into a fierce kiss, teeth and tongues gnashing together as he struggled to get out of his clothes.

He promised to buy you a new gown as he ripped it off of you, tearing it straight down the middle, desperate to feel your naked body against his.

The dual gasps of surprise when he entered your core made you both pause in place, hearts racing. There were tears in his eyes as he stared down at you.

“Why the tears?” you whispered, reaching up to caress his cheek, catching the first drop as it fell from his eyes.

“Because I am so in love with you and never thought you'd feel the same. My heart feels like it's going to jump out of my body.” he returned.

“And I will catch it and hang on to it for as long as you wish me to.” you smiled, leaning up to kiss him. He sank into the kiss even as his hips started a slow and smooth thrust into you, his dancer training kicking in and being beneficial to you both.

Whispered words of love peppered the air between kisses and deep moans as you pledged your love with your bodies. The sun was peeking up over the horizon just as you had showered and changed the sheets on the bed, crawling beneath the cool material, naked bodies, happy hearts and minds pressed together.

He had to leave in another day, but he was going to make the most of it with you.

[wings-of-ink]

Hello everyone!

(A quick note, this is tagged as mature due to the brief touch on spicy content for subscribers, but there's no real "mature" content below, it is just a list of warnings.) The warnings are typed with strikethrough in case you would rather skip this part.

I'm just stopping by to give you some broad updates on what is cooking on my side of the screen.

Chapter 6 is up to 86k words. I have a feeling it may end up the biggest yet. I have about six segments left to finish. The goal is to finish this for release to subscribers in July – take note that this is my personal goal and not a deadline. I am not setting a deadline because it sets me up for failure. There's substantial pressure when working toward a specific date and it will ultimately create more delays for me. If it goes up in July, subscribers will have it 30 days in advance of the public release. Saves will be broken – just expect this. Likely, hard saves will not work either. There will be substantial corrections in the previous chapters and added content in Chapter 5. Some coding will have also changed.

For June subscribers on Patreon and Ko-fi, Zahn is up to bat!

Crow Tier:  Expect a heartwarming story featuring Zahn (gender selectable). Posting date: 6/15

Raven Tier:  Expect a steamy and kinky exchange with Zahn (cis woman). Posting date: 6/15

Warnings/Menu:  Bondage of RO, consensual light rough play, overstimulation, light orgasm denial, squirting, optional content related to reproduction (if specific MC characteristics are chosen).

Note that if female Zahn does not tickle your fancy (as indicated by past polls, most have reported to prefer male), I have implemented a way to read the story that sort of "switches" MC and Zahn. You'd want to be comfortable reading you/your MC as a cis woman though.

Both Tiers:  My goal is to have another teaser project sample posted this month as well. I will post publicly when I know for sure if this will get done. It may be toward the end of the month.

If Chapter 6 is ready in July, there will be no extras posted, and the below* will be moved to the following month.

If Chapter 6 is not ready in July, *there will be a series of side stories posted for both tiers that are much shorter. The Crow Tier will likely get a few cute ones with the ROs and probably some world-building ones as well. The Raven Tier will get a series of spicy "quickies," each featuring a different RO. These will not be interactive or gender-selectable for either MC or the RO, but I will try to have a variety of content to tickle your fancy.

In Lunan News…

I celebrated my 10th wedding anniversary! My spouse and I have been together for over 15 years in total and I still haven't managed to scare him away (not for lack of trying either).

My shoulder is not better. I met with my doctor and after lots of poking and prodding and wiggling my arm around, we worked out a different set of stretches and exercises for me to try. I've also been given a couple medications. They are pretty sure my rotator cuff is slightly torn or very irritated. If I see no improvement with the new regiment in the next few weeks, the next step is a MRI to take a look. This could eventually mean surgery which I am NOT jazzed about in the slightest. I am hopeful, with the meds and the new stretches, I do feel a bit better already and can use my arm with less pain after stretching. The plus side is, this does not currently and should not impede my ability to write. Thank the stars for that because otherwise I would go insane.

Work is still being ridiculous. I may have to do more overtime this month, but hopefully just during one week and then I'm done completely (or I'll at least not have to do as much). Eventually, once things even out, I believe I will be able to fully open my Tumblr inbox and also go through more of the backlog I have there already (approximately mid July). However, they sent out a request for "anonymous" feedback and I happily gave them all the fucking feedback they could handle (professionally, of course). We'll see just how anonymous it is, I guess. Who knows – maybe I'll be job-hunting and writing full time before too long, lol.

Our kitties are doing great! Arlo is obsessed with reflecting light and now chatters at the ceiling in anticipation of sunlight coming through the windows. Miles likes to watch me sleep – a lot.

Since you made it this far, how about some teasers from subscriber extras and Chapter 6!?

Chapter 6 – "Tarot" Card Scene:

The tingle is back in our fingers, very light and almost tickling. Once the first card is down, the tingle returns so you place a second, and then a third. After the fourth card is down, the tingle stops. The reader gestures for you to then flip your first card. The card is upright, depicting a large platform in the middle, held up by the silhouette of a giant person. The platform contains several buildings atop it, like a prospering city. "The Architect," they begin. "A common card for readings on relationships and a good sign at that. You are a foundation, a safe place for a relationship to build and thrive. You support and shelter your loved one even if they do not understand the type of help they need or how much. If you or they have any unresolved feelings, it's important to address them soon or cracks in your foundation can ruin the entire structure."

Zahn spicy extra:

There are many things you love about Zahn, but chief among them is her willingness to play with you. She trusts you implicitly when you want to try new things, she instigates just as much. Even when things don't go very well, she laughs it off with you, always saying, 'At least we tried something new.' She's always there to laugh with you when it's awkward and never puts down your ideas or makes fun of your desires. So, for her birthday, you are going to love her as hard as you can.

I hope you are all safe and well. This year is flying by so fast. I can't believe it is already Pride Month (aka June)! I wish I would have had the time to compile some extras to celebrate, but that will need to wait until next year. Just remember that Pride is eternal. Nothing can take that away. Be safe as you celebrate and find joy in who you are.

Happy Pride, my loves. ^_^

[mar64ds]

So what now? What I’m working on next!

After finishing Friendship Test I wondered what would be my next project, I also wondered if I would take a break when Deltarune came out. Now we are here and I can say: I don’t want a break I want to keep working on my silly projects. So, what plan do I have? Well, I don’t! I just have a list of things I want to work on for the next years! Hopefully even be able to sell some of them, since I’m not doing very financially well it would be a lot of help (but you can pirate my games if you can’t afford to pay, even my $1 games, go crazy)

Anyway! Here is a list of my objectives. Enjoy!:

Friendship Test

Of course we’re starting with the big one, the one most people only care for. You can read this one and skip the rest, go crazy.

So! First of all, I would like to fix all typos the game has, I haven’t forgotten about this, I promise I will do it one day.

Second of all, any plans for merch? Well, I am not a very smart person and I have a lot of difficulty understanding how making merch works all by myself. It’s not very easy! I would love to make merch if I understood how I could. Maybe once I figure out something I can make anything, trust me it’s definitely not because I’m too lazy to do anything.

However!

I have an idea of making a 100 pages long comic with multiple shorts stories of the characters. It would be fully colored and present stories from pre-game, post-game and in between. I am not focused on this one right now, but it’s an idea I really like. I would sell it digitally so I don’t have to worry

But most important of all, where is this series going? Good question! So far, this game and all its post game art is all there is.

… However!

While the game is not officially on development, I’ve drawn a bunch of sprite work for Estranged Family, the spin-off game I’ve talked about before, as well as started writing a script. I do not see this project as being officially on the works, but I am testing (heh) the waters a little bit, it has a chance of going somewhere.

Aside from that, I have a little surprise I’m working on for Friendship Test. I can’t say what it is, but the script is fully written, most of the sprites are done and I’m starting programming today. I would like to have it finished by Christmas. So, even if I can’t reveal it yet, maybe look forward for that? Or don’t, Exe won’t mind.

Sam and Max

Sam and Max are a big inspiration for my work, they inspire me to create a lot, they also haven’t had a new official story since 2010 (if we don’t count the VR game), so it really motivates me to create my own stories for them.

Which is why I don’t have one but TWO projects related to them!

-Mansion Play

I’ve had the concept of this fake fangame since 2023, it’s practically the reason why I was motivated to make my own long projects like Friendship Test. There is a lot about it that I would like to rework, but it is an idea I like SO much. It would not be a game sadly, I would love it to be but it would take me 10 years and I would not make money from any of it and I do need money to survive. It would be what you have seen so far, drawings imitating a point and click game.

I’m excited to go back to working on it, however, it is still in a bit of a pause because...

-Sam&Max RPG

So, this one I already have a bunch of work done, it’s shorter and it is an actual game, which is why I’m prioritizing it before Mansion Play.

Sam&Max RPG parodies rpg games, but it is a passion project for character I really enjoy, and there might be more heart to the story than it might seem at first...

Obsolete Friends

This game is a bit of a challenge for me, it is very different from everything I create but I’m so fascinated by it, I like it a lot. I would REALLY like to make this game. It would be shorter than Friendship Test, I can imagine it being like 5 hours maybe, but it would have some better quality to it, at least I hope so.

This is one of the projects I’m most focused on right now, I haven’t done much yet, but I’m very excited to continue to work on it.

Short games

I have plans to make 1-2 hour long short little games, they will be free but will offer you the ‘name your own price’ for those who want/can support my work! These games will be related to some of my ocs you might already be familiar with:

-BreakTime

I have an idea of a short game where you play as a minion that was just hired and help out other minions that are going through some trouble today. You get to interact with a lot of silly minions and see how a regular day working for Lord Unicorn is like.

-How does it end

Short game about how Mask and Berry meet. You play as powerful ‘god’ Mask, doing simple tasks as picking up dirty plates or watering flowers while you slowly get to meet this simple but kind old man named Berry.

-Unlikely unlikable us

This one is very vague at the moment, it could possibly not even happen. But I really like the idea of a sam&max-like game with these two. Not my priority, but it’s very fun to think about.

A Loving House

I am very surprised how much people like this one! Aside from Friendship Test, everyone seems to like A Loving House the most out of all my OC projects.

It is a story I really like, and I’ve been reworking it a little on my mind lately and I like it more. Maybe not right now, but I definitely want to fully make this story. It could take years, but you WILL see A Loving House one day, that’s a promise.

Puppets

For those few that like my puppet work, I would like to train my puppetry skills a bit better, which is why I have a mini-series of shorts in mind with a certain character…

Dolly of course!

The idea would be that Dolly would have a youtube channel where she does ‘art tutorials’, even if she’s not really good at it. It would be silly and episodic, but with a running theme about being passionate about your hobbies even when you’re not good at them. Perhaps a certain question mark exclamation point puppet would also be part of the story...

I have other ideas for my puppets, but for now this is my only puppet objective.

Comics

Mar, weren’t you going to make that Laughing at Fear comic??? Weren’t you going to rework the New Mouse in Town story??? Don’t you never shut up about making BreakTime short comics?

Yes.

So… I REALLY want to make all of these, but right now I am in a bit of a block when it comes to my traditional drawings. Not an art block, because I know exactly what I want to draw, more like an exhaustion block. Making comics traditionally takes a lot of work, making five panels makes me want to cry right now, and I have so many other ideas that I would like to work on first that these are not my first priority. However, I will definitely work on them one day, ESPECIALLY Laughing at Fear, which is literally one of my favorite stories I have.

Undertale?

I would actually really like to fully create my story idea of Flowey deciding to leave the underground and meeting Echo and other monsters that still haven’t left the underground a reality. It is a very fun concept and I like Flowey and my cool oc Echo. Would it be a game, or a comic or edited screenshots with a lot of text boxes…? No idea! But I would like to make it.

Fanart?

‘Does this mean you’re not going to do any fanart?’ No, I still will from time to time! Whenever the inspiration hits me, they’re not going away.

Commissions???

I tried opening commissions one time and it was a DISASTER. I didn’t receive a single commissions even if they were open for a whole year, it was very funny but financially unproductive. Even if not right now, I would definitely like to try again, I really need the money.

---

And those are my objectives! I don’t know what my life will be like in 10 years, but I do know what my projects will be like in the next 10 years lol. Thanks for reading, I hope you look forward to some of these, and even if you don’t that’s awesome, thanks for reading anyway.

[rainstormwrite]

The new update is now public.

Hello again, people!

That's it. This is the day.

The new update is now public.

(You're required to start a new playthrough if you don't want any game-breaking bugs, by the way.)

What's done:

All three routes are finished.

All the POVs are rewritten to be in the third person (they actually feel way better than I thought they would be).

Some parts of the first fight scene are fixed and clarified.

Some pronoun bugs are fixed.

What's planned:

…

Writing another update, obviously.

Word count:

Including command lines: 271245 Excluding command lines: 260837

But, I would ask you to temper your expectations in terms of the new content's single playthrough length. I'm going to paraphrase this from my previous post: the actual amount of content that was added with this new update is somewhere between 15 to 25 pages (approximately).

Even though the word count increased from 53k to 260k, the only event to happen in this update is one conversation/confrontation (ridiculous, I know). This is primarily due to the overwhelming amount of variable text that changes depending on your earlier choices and due to the number of routes you can take. If you're interested in the reasons for me to decide to do that, check out my previous post.

So, basically, each reader will experience the new content very differently but may not get as much satisfaction due to its shortness. If that is the case, I can only suggest you make another playthrough with different choices, but, if that's not your cup of tea, I would totally understand. But, overall, the game is very… how do I put it..? Multiple-playthroughs-friendly, I'd say.

Safe to say, the update will be incredibly polarizing, no doubt, but I'm always open to feedback.

And, even though I haven't found any bugs or inconsistencies, I am obviously aware that someone else may find them, so, if you are that someone, please report the bugs to me.

I think that's all regarding the update itself, so go ahead and play it. Hope you will like it!

PLAY THE UPDATE

Now, onto other interesting things…

From this point onward, I'm starting to take writing seriously, and that's why I've finally decided to open my Patreon page.

I've made a free introductory post there that explains what I'll be offering, but, right off the bat, I want to tell you that I can't offer you things that other creators are usually offering: Q&As and What-if scenarios. If we're talking about Q&As, I don't want to do them because I consider mystery to be a big part of my work, so I don't really want to wiggle around every question that people will ask me because it won't be fair to them and won't feel good to me. As for What-if scenarios, I don't want to write out some hypothetical scenarios when I can spend that time to progress the plot forward in the actual story. And, trust me, if I'm going to spread my attention too thin, I'm never going to finish this project… And I don't think you and I want that.

What I will provide, however, are progress updates, sneak peeks, early access, and monthly side stories, which the community will be able to choose by voting.

So, I'd advise you to read through the new update first, decide whether you're willing to put up with my approach to the content, and then consider subscribing if what I offer on Patreon is enough for you. If, after all that, you decide to become a member, I'll be very grateful to you. If not, I will still appreciate you being interested in my work and taking the time to read through it.

Thanks for tuning in, and have a pleasant day or a peaceful night!

[bomberqueen17]

home

This is the time of year when it's hardest to live in two places. I've been at the farm for three weeks now, and I was going to go home yesterday, but today is the memorial service for a friend who helped us with chickens for a decade and whose daughter is a close friend of Farmkid and who was taken too soon by ovarian cancer. She didn't want a dreary funeral, everyone is to wear bright colors, and the afterparty is that we're planting a garden in her memory at the library with donated plants from dozens of volunteers. It's raining, but all the better for the plants really.

I want to be home in Buffalo, but I couldn't miss this.

While I was gone, Dude was offered a job, which he decided to take, and put in and worked his notice, and now has already had his last day, and will be starting the new job on Monday. I was thinking the sensible thing to do would be to go home tomorrow morning but I might go home tonight just so I can see him a bit longer before he starts his job, I am sure he has a lot he wants to talk about. We don't really do phone calls, we just text and one of us inevitably wanders off before the conversation is really over, so.

Yeah I might get myself ready this morning, and then leave after the garden planting. We'll see how it looks. I don't need to elaborately put the cabin to bed because I'll be back next weekend.

Though! In cabin doings-- I have electricity now! For years I've used an extension cord from the greenhouse, but they took down that greenhouse and removed the wiring, so i was without any power at all for the beginning of this season. But BIL wanted to put power over here correctly, so he dug a trench and buried a power cable and a water line. The water line isn't hooked up to anything yet, that's a project for later, but I don't have a sink anyway-- the one I had in here last year was stolen from the other cabin on the property, which had been unoccupied, but now there are two people living in it voluntarily for some reason, and so I gave them their sink back and I have to buy/find myself a countertop, I already have a double-bay stainless sink salvaged from a barn, and I need to somehow build the support for the countertop, and then I can have back the function I had last year-- no running water, but a drain, which until you haven't had one you don't realize how much that matters-- and eventually when the water line gets hooked up I could have actual running water. So.

Anyway. On Wednesday BIL stole some time away from a different important task and hooked up the power. So now I actually have real power, not extension cord power, and I can run an electric kettle. I could have a fridge too if i wanted but like, I don't know if I need one? I don't plan to cook out here. It's not that kind of place. But I'm really enjoying being able to make tea, even though it's not cold anymore.

My sister also decided to throw out the foam pads from the collapsible beds of the pop-up camper they owned that has since become largely unusable, and I snagged those and now my sleeping loft is properly a pillow fort. I need to make or buy or find some kind of cover, I stacked the two pads and they're covered in ancient scratchy upholstery fabric and they're also not a standard bed size so I need to work something out. (52"x67", what even is that???) but they're soft enough to sleep on and mostly I figure they're for lounging.

I still haven't gotten the cabin entirely out of Winter Mode, though. All my clothing stuff is shoved against the south wall with sheets over it, leaving the stacked lumber along the north wall free in case someone had free time to finish the ceiling. But I think I can safely cover that back over now that the season is started. (It apparently almost happened several times this winter so it wasnt' as silly as it sounds.)

I did steal an hour yesterday and borrowed the electric weed whacker and knocked down all the tall grass around my cabin, so I don't have to bushwhack my way to the outhouse anymore. I should follow that up by laying down cardboard sheets and wood chip mulch to start converting the space to garden, but I don't have time if I'm leaving today. Theres even plants I could put in, today, if I did, but-- it's raining, and I don't have wood chips, and and and. well... A week from now those plants won't be on offer anymore, they won't survive, so maybe I'll run out in an hour or so in the rain and at least get the cardboard put down and punch some holes in it to put the seedlings through, and weigh it down with rocks so I can wood-chip it when I get back.

Anyway. I want to be back in Buffalo but I don't want to leave here, I have a lot going on and want to keep working. LOL funny how this works.

[freckles-a-constellation]

what made broadchurch and good omens your favorite dt media? :D

unfortunately I'm a bit of a basic bitch when it comes to most media and I believe there's many good reason why these two are so popular, but my personal reasons for naming these two are:

I haven't actually seen that many of David's later works yet and while I'm having loads of fun with his early career it's clear he's come a long way since then in terms of his craft + as a young actor he didn't have that many options of things he could get cast in so some of it is,, quite something (I stopped watching LA Without a Map halfway through because the second hand embarrassment overpowered me and I've yet to pick it back up) or else too short an appearance to be able to be considered on a level with Broadchurch and Good Omens, no matter how much I enjoyed watching it (Davina, Spaces, Sweetnightgoodheart, Traffic Warden, Only Human, his appearance in Dramarama).

Some of what little of his later works I've seen so far also just didn't stick with me beyond being a pleasant watch (Einstein and Eddington, Criminal: UK, The Spies of Warsaw and even Secret Smile are in this category for me).

I adored David's portrayal of Macbeth but I loved the play before I saw him in it and I'd feel weird to class it as a David Tennant media if that makes sense? I haven't seen the rest of the productions of Shakespeare David's been in yet but I suspect I'll feel similarly about them, as I have read the plays.

I'm obsessed with Rex Is Not Your Lawyer but ultimately it is an unaired pilot. So as much as I love Rex the character with my whole heart, I never would have watched it if it wasn't for David Tennant and my enjoyment of it rests almost entirely on his performance and the interactions between Rex and the other characters, so naming the pilot itself among my favourite media DT has been in would be a stretch.

Gracepoint I really enjoyed but Broadchurch is just objectively better. I was thinking about Broadchurch long after I finished it and in fact I am not over it yet. David's acting in it is phenomenal, the writing is top notch, the 3 seasons provide lots of delicious material to gnaw on and I have a personal weakness towards police shows, sue me.

And Good Omens... do I even need to justify that one. It's what got me obsessed with David Tennant, so that alone gives me an extra soft spot for it, but also it's not something that I watched for DT, but something that is holistically up my alley. It's fantasy, my favourite genre ever. It has angels and demons which I am weak for. I loved the book. And while the Neil Gaiman situation admittedly soured my fun enough to make me step away from the Good Omens fandom in order to sort my shit out, the show is undeniably incredible in more ways than I can list. And David Tennant is so so amazing as Crowley and his chemistry with Michael Sheen is simply delightful. I love Crowley and Aziraphale so so much and will actually be cosplaying Aziraphale at the next fantasy con I go to. I have most of my costume ready, just missing an appropriately coloured bowtie and a Crowley.

But yeah I've yet to watch the DT parts of Doctor Who and also many other projects of his that are beloved by the fandom so it's very possible I will one day have a different fave.

[altschmerzes]

I want to hear about your fics. Tell me about your wips. What are you working on now. What's got you really excited?

OOOOOOOO YOU HAVE UNLEASHED ME, MY FRIEND...

the thing about me that i'm sure you will have noticed by now if you've spent more than five minutes on my blog or in my general company is that i am always working on five hundred projects at once. this is not... like, great, so to speak for my ability to consistently finish one thing but i don't know how much steam i'd be able to maintain if i wasn't constantly playing hopscotch with projects so like. win some lose some?

anyways. i have five hundred projects always. right now i would say the ones i am working on with the greatest degree of dedication/effort, in terms of Major Projects at least and not just like. oneshots here and there are wriggle up on dry land (baby jamie ted lasso fic), history rhymes (ted lasso fic centred on sexual trauma), loneliness into loneliness (the qpr two aces fic and its associated concepts), and the newest of the bunch that i don't think i've really talked about, which is titled 'drive the wedge' (from the tmg song 'heel turn 2'). here is a needlessly thorough explanation of THAT fic. the short version is, in the excellent words of my friend @cartwrong, "Thought River had a bad time in s4? Its about to get to worse."

drive the wedge is a slow horses fic wherein at the end of 4x05, patrice abducts river at gunpoint and when he does so he doesn't drive him to that cafe to meet with frank. instead, patrice takes river to a remote, isolated manor where frank is waiting for them.

it goes downhill from there.

the horses do not see or hear from river again for almost five months. during that time, frank does his level best to break river and rebuild him into a soldier, into a weapon worth using. this... doesn't really work. in fact, the process ends up breaking not river, but patrice, who watches his father torture the only brother he has left until he can't take watching it anymore.

meanwhile, slough house is on overdrive trying to find a missing colleague who the park is all to quick to deem missing (presumed dead) and rubber-stamp his file as such before tucking it away in a dusty corner. louisa almost quits. (she tries to quit. the only reason that she doesn't is because lamb shows up to ask her back, because she's at least almost competent and if they want any hope of getting river back they're going to need her. he also promises that he won't make her do fuck-all that isn't to do with finding river. she agrees to return on these conditions. catherine comes back too, of her own accord, because she can't tolerate the idea of being outside of the loop on this one. she has to be there.)

louisa is generally having a bad fucking time. she is dealing with grief and terror over the maybe-loss of her best friend, and she is also trying to find him, not to mention dealing with his mother. she ends up spending a lot of time working late with lamb, and filling out that dynamic is one of my favourite things in planning this thing out. they're astonishingly similar sometimes, and they inadvertently keep each other afloat during the long, difficult months river spends in captivity. (lamb is not handling this well either. he will not be acknowledging this. he WILL be yelling at the park for trying to legally declare river dead.)

ultimately, everything comes to a head when louisa follows a lead that she knows better than to follow, and comes to in a room in a manor she's never been to before. she is intended to be the final blow that breaks river's resolve, except that it doesn't quite end up shaking out that way, and they're both found alive, if not exactly well.

the following months are hard, too, in their own way, as everyone tries to re-find their footing again. there's endless hours of debriefing from the park, who aren't totally convinced river didn't go dark-side during his captivity. there's what to tell david, whose condition has deteriorated sharply thanks to the sudden and traumatic loss of his grandson. there's the severe physical and emotional trauma river is carrying and trying to recover from. there's louisa's own profound trauma from the whole ordeal - from his disappearance and his absence and everything she had to deal with during that to her own abduction and near-death. lamb tries, with varying levels of success, to be a human being, because they need him to be and because catherine told him in no uncertain terms that this time he has no choice. we all know i'm a rescue and recovery bitch, this is the part i am All About.

anyways. it's a mess, it's so much fun, there's so much going on here. im having a blast. :)

[gundamthey17]

Day 6 of Payneland Promptfest 2024

6 down, 1 to go! It's my goal to finish before the Valentine's Day promptfest starts in *checks imaginary watch* 10 days. (And no, sadly I will not be committing to writing anything for the Valentine's Day promptfest, because I am supposed to be writing a thesis.)

Day 6: star | “Make a wish” | casting a spell

Summary: Edwin makes two wishes, one year apart. It's amazing how much can change in just one year.

xxx

It was New Year’s Eve, and Edwin and Charles were standing on the roof of their office building, as they had done for the past thirty-odd years. Edwin had wondered if this year would be different, after Port Townsend. But Crystal had decided to visit Jenny over the holidays. And while there had been changes between himself and Charles, they were for the better. He would not have thought it possible for the two of them to grow closer, having been best friends and business partners for over three decades, and yet… 

Charles grabbed his arm, violently jostling him out of his reverie. “Here it comes!” They could hear excited voices in the street and neighboring flats. Charles joined in the countdown. “Ten! Nine! Eight! Seven! Six! Five! Four! Three! Two! One!”

A bell tolled midnight, and they watched the fireworks exploding over the distant Thames, painting the sky in brilliant colors.

“Happy New Year! Make a wish!”

Edwin closed his eyes and tried to think of a wish. He listened to the fireworks, the music, the distant hum of the living. He could feel Charles standing next to him, bouncing on the balls of his feet. 

And he wished… he wished that Charles – no, that was selfish. Charles had accepted Edwin for who he was. Edwin had worried that his confession would create awkwardness or tension between them, despite Charles’s assurances to the contrary. Miraculously, that seemed to not be the case. And, as Charles had said, they had forever to figure things out. It had taken Edwin decades to come to terms with his own feelings. He would never dream of rushing Charles into anything. And if Charles’ feelings didn't change? If even after decades, he did not love Edwin the same way Edwin loved him, that was fine. To spend his afterlife with the best person he had ever met was much more than Edwin would ever have dared to ask or hope for. Who was he to wish for anything more than that?

Edwin sighed. He hoped that his romantic feelings for Charles would fade over time, for his own sake as much as Charles’. And he wished… He wished that he would be able to kiss someone in the coming year. Perhaps the most surprising discovery from his time in Port Townsend was the fact that he rather enjoyed kissing. He would welcome an opportunity to try it again.

“What did you wish for?” Charles asked.

Edwin blinked at him, startled. He knew he could not blush, but somehow his cheeks felt hot anyway. “You cannot tell anyone your wish, or it will not come true,” he said, hoping Charles wouldn't notice how flustered he was.

Charles studied him for a moment, but he didn’t press. Instead, he smiled his easy smile and put his arm around Edwin’s shoulders. “Cheers to a new year, mate.”

“Cheers.”

---

A year was not such a long time, particularly for someone who had been dead for over a century. But a lot could change in a year.

Niko, brought back to the Agency after being found and rescued from another plane of existence.

Crystal, expelling David for good, and growing into her powers more and more.

The Night Nurse (Charles insisted on calling her Charlie, to her eternal annoyance) popping in at random intervals, giving them cases and evaluating their progress.

Edwin had changed too. He had had no idea at the time what a difference it would make to be free from Hell and Death for good. (Provided he and Charles continued to be ‘useful’ in solving cases, of course, but those were never in short supply.) As an incorporeal being, Edwin should not have been able to feel lighter. It defied all logic. And yet – that was the most accurate way he could think of to describe how he felt. 

Charles had even commented on it, several months ago. “Got a spring in your step today, haven’t you?” he’d said. “What’s got you in such a good mood?”

“I do not know,” Edwin had replied honestly. “But you are correct, I am… feeling quite well today.”

Weeks had passed before Edwin had been able to pin down the source of his improved mood. When he finally did so, and informed Charles of it, Charles had pulled him into a metaphorically-bone-crushing hug. “I’m so happy for you, mate,” he’d said, his words slightly muffled into Edwin’s shoulder.

That wasn’t to say that the year had been without challenges. There were growing pains as Crystal, the Night Nurse, and Niko joined the Agency. Edwin’s brief return to Hell and the torture inflicted by Esther’s machine had left psychological wounds that were not yet fully healed. And there were cases that went awry every now and then, as they were wont to do. But Edwin and Charles had weathered the storms, as they always did. In many ways, they were better at it now than they ever had been. Edwin knew now that the strength of their bond could withstand anything the universe might throw at them.

And Charles. Charles had changed as well, and Edwin could not have been more delighted. He’d grown in confidence until he was positively radiant, decades of self deprecation and doubt slowly falling away, replaced by a glowing warmth. He was learning, slowly but steadily, that he did not have to pretend at happiness when he - or anyone else - was upset. And Edwin was learning to see Charles’ mask for what it was; in truth, he was dismayed that it had taken him so long to do so. It was painfully obvious, now, the paper-thin smiles he sometimes wore. They talked about it from time to time, late at night when most of the living were in the lands of Morpheus. Edwin assured him that he need not pretend, and Charles, perhaps for the first time, accepted those assurances. Sometimes, he would tell Edwin what was bothering him. Other times, they would walk through London’s winding streets in comfortable silence, letting the night work its magic. Their troubles always seemed to diminish in the dawn of a new day.

All of that would have been more than enough, a flood of spring water to Edwin's parched soul. But even taken as a whole, those changes couldn't hold a candle to what had changed between them.

A hasty confession, late at night, up on the roof. Words, meticulously rehearsed, tumbling over themselves in the moment.

“I love you, Edwin Payne.”

“As more than a friend.”

“If you'll have me.”

A kiss, the first of many.

It had taken significantly less than forever, all told.

And now, another New Year’s Eve had brought them back to that rooftop. It was the same in many ways, and yet it was so, so different.

“Make a wish,” Charles whispered, his fingers entwined with Edwin’s.

Edwin closed his eyes and wished. When he opened them again, he looked over to see that Charles still had his eyes closed. His face was tipped back, toward the sky. Edwin studied his profile in the near-darkness, the flashes of fireworks illuminating his jawline, curving upward toward the pointed tip of his ear, his dark curls, his long lashes, his elegant nose, his lips…

Charles opened his eyes and caught Edwin staring.

“What did you wish for?” Edwin asked softly.

“I thought you weren't supposed to say, or else it won't come true.”

“To the contrary. I believe that sharing my wish will make it more likely to come true.”

“Yeah? What is it, then?”

“I wish that you would kiss me.”

Charles smiled. Then he cupped Edwin's face in his hands, closed his eyes, and granted Edwin’s wish.

[venusmage]

Commission/Life update for 2024

EDIT 4/30/25

Progress is still happening! I've finished several large orders since the last update. As always, feel free to reach out to me with concerns and I'll get back to you as soon as I can. I'll be taking May 2025 off completely from coms as I'm finishing the school semester. Thankfully I'm not taking summer classes THIS year so commissions work will start again on June 1st.

The best days to reach me are Mondays, Wednesdays and Fridays at the moment. Otherwise it might take me a day or so to get back to you. I work on my own projects on the weekends to preserve my sanity, lol! Just know if I'm drawing something else, I haven't forgotten my queue!

------

Original post:

Just want everyone to know I AM okay now and life has gotten better recently. However the past year and a half have been extremely difficult and I'm only now getting back on my feet. I generally don't like sharing life details publicly, but as a freelancer with clients that have been waiting for a while I feel like transparency is key.

If you don't want an explanation for the delays and just want to know my completion timeline, that's totally okay. Here is all the info up front. I'm going to continue updating my commission queue as usual and will not be accepting any more orders until ALL of the queue is completed. I'm working on finishing the half and full bodies first since they've been the longest waiting in queue. Then the rest. I don't have a set date in mind for when they'll be all done for good but the goal is by the end of the year. I think that's more than doable for me now. If you're a client of mine and have questions/concerns, please message me either here or on Discord and I'll do my best to help you. My username on discord is the same as my Tumblr username. Twitter and Ko-Fi are also options but I don't check them as frequently. I usually work Monday-Thursday so that will be the best time to shoot me a message or expect an update to the queue.

Information on what's been going on is below.

CW for mentions of death, financial hardship and homophobia.

As a few of you might remember, in 2019 I was disowned by my mother for being a lesbian. I made the choice to go no-contact. Since then, up until LAST YEAR, she's routinely harassed me or had other family harass me, stalked me on social media, tried to get to me through the website I take commission orders, and threatened me multiple times. I was forced to move across the country both because I felt unsafe and because my partner had family elsewhere that were more accepting. I've had to change my phone number twice.

It's been extremely difficult both financially and mentally to keep my head above water. In 2021 my grandfather died and I still haven't felt like I've been able to properly grieve. I wasn't able to see him due to her and I wasn't invited to his funeral. We were very close and he meant the world to me. In 2023 my grandmother passed away very suddenly as well, and my mother used it as an excuse to harass me over ko-fi/my professional email. It was such a horrific experience that I fell into a months long spiral that I only just now feel like I'm climbing out of. This is when commissions first stalled. I was also starting to get overwhelmed, as I had to take on more work than I could realistically handle in order to pay bills and rent. That's really it - I just had to take more orders so we weren't kicked out of our apartment, and as my mental state deteriorated I couldn't keep up.

The good news is that my wife and moved earlier this year we're living with supportive(!) family now and our financial burden is much lighter. This gives me time to work on my backlog without re-opening. I'm also going to school again, back in college starting this summer for a second degree. For my own health after commissions are finished I'm likely going to take a break on opening them for a good while, even though I really enjoy doing them.

In the past two months amazing and not-amazing things have happened. The amazing thing is I got an ADHD diagnosis, something I didn't even know had been ruining my life for years. I'm still getting used to the proper medications but I'm already seeing a big improvement. It's as much of a relief as it is frustrating. My mother also reared her head again (like she usually does at least once a year) - this time, though, I learned she'd had a stroke. While I'm not involved with her anymore, I think most people could understand how it would still be a very weird and upsetting situation. As of right now I'm free of her once again, she seems to be making a good recovery and will hopefully continue to live a happy life far away from me. Still, those two things back to back have been a LOT to deal with on top of just trying to get better in general. I stepped away from the internet for a while for my own sanity.

The downside to being a freelancer is that there's not always a safety net. That's what happened to me. Thank you all very much for being kind and patient, I genuinely have had nothing but polite interactions with all of you and I really appreciate it. I'm sorry my personal bullshit got in the way of getting my work done for you. This is the longest I've ever taken to complete commissions and it's something that I'm deeply ashamed of. I promise they will get done. Being medicated and starting to recover from the family drama has revitalized me a bit. If you have any questions or concerns please reach out.

[talenlee]

My Weirdly Embarrassing Love of Spreadsheets

This is gunna be a post about like, the nuts and bolts of making big projects like ongoing writing projects like this blog, but to get there I need to talk to you about silly stuff like journals and buses and spreadsheets. We get there, please, trust me.

One of the first tools I made for blogging was a table in my bullet journal. If you’re not familiar, a common thing to do with bullet journals (or ‘bujos’ as cooler or more tedious people than I call them), is to write up a calendar at the start of each month, something that lists what you’re doing through the course of the month. When I started doing this, I had a way to look at the month, that I could scribble on, so I did, and it meant I was able to get into the habits of putting an article on a game every friday and an article on a story every monday, resulting in my Story Pile and Game Pile series.

This was back in 2017, and the notebooks are in my bookshelf, each of them a record of a year that… huh, I could go back and reread.

Anyway, one of the problems that came up with this system was the bus.

Not kidding.

I would get a bus home from the uni most days. When I was on that bus, or when I was at the uni, I would have time to write, but I wouldn’t necessarily have access to my notebook. I found myself wanting a copy of the chart that I could manage on two different computers – my laptop at the university, and my computer at home. This is how One Stone got written, too, the trips home on the bus being when I wrote the blog posts that became the first chapters of that book, eyes closed, not looking at the screen, and focusing on the road to avoid being car sick.

It is wild to consider how much of my first book I loved writing I did with my eyes effectively closed.

In 2019, I resolved midway through the year that I needed a better system, and started on a system that would handle the transport between two locations better, for the year coming where I anticipated a lot of travel between two sites.

Ahem.

Yeah, uh, 2020.

Anyway, that it wasn’t necessary didn’t stop it being useful! That led to the creation of this Google Sheets spreadsheet:

I made this in Sheets because Sheets is like Excel, which I like using, and it’s like Calc, which I now use, because the version of Excel I pirated doesn’t have access to IFS functions. Point is, this sheet, as originally conceived, did not need anything as a spreadsheet to work; I wanted a table with 365 cells in it that could show the entire year at a glance and be given a simple, straightforward tick or cross. It became something more, as the years progressed.

I’ve been using this kind of spreadsheet now, for 5 years. In 2025, the spreadsheet looks almost the same:

Being a spreadsheet, it is an array of data. You can manipulate that. You can track data in it. You can use indexes. You can cocatenate things, and that’s the stage this spreadsheet is at now. When I sit down to work on a blog post, the first thing I do is not open up WordPress to pull at my drafts, it’s to instead open up this spreadsheet and look at when I have slots available, where my next upcoming gap is, and what kind of thing that gap wants.

Blue slots are story pile, green are game pile. I have all the video article slots pencilled in already with a ‘V,’ on the working version, so I can look at the line of Xes under each date and then see the point where oh, yeah, I gotta work on one of those spots. But see, also, in that top left? That number? The 0 is a count of how many blog posts have been set in place for the year, how close I am to being finished, or on track for the number of days in the year I’m at.

I try to keep the blog progress (blogress) at around 51 posts. That is not because this is the number I’ve decided I need or anything like that, it’s just a round number that makes me happy. Just being able to look at that number and see it being reasonably high? That’s a progress number. I could make it a progress bar proper, with a pair of graphs, but y’know, not worth it. I could make it a fraction too, like, the formula it’s doing over a “/365” if I wanted.

The thing that I’m most happy with though is the cell next to it.

See that cell looks like this:

='Topics & Ideas'!A2

And oh ho what is that?

Well that leads to this:

Here’s what this is: This is a whole spreadsheet of idea categories. Each category has at the top of it, a cell that looks down in the list for a random entry in that list and just provides it. For some things this is a long list of possibilities, for some things this is a tiny list of possibilities. But that is an index function – it looks randomly up and down the list and finds something. That means any time I want something for a specific theme, I can go to this sheet and I’ll see a random selection from these ideas. If I have an idea for a thing to write about at some point, I can jam that in the list, and know that it will eventually be exposed to me at some random point.

Then, at the head of that list, there’s the cell that also randomises the other cells along that horizontal line. Which means that any time I open this blog arranger up, I get to see a random offering of just… anything I could be writing right now. That list can include really broad things, like hey, write about an OC? and sometimes it could be really narrow and specific, like here’s a real event, you know about that one, you should write about it.

Now let me be clear: This is not a tool I recommend for everyone. This is a lot of elaborate effort I put into what is essentially, a producivity toy. This lets me produce a big pile of input and get a random output, and it lets me collect long lists or short lists of things and also, along with all of that, I can just get a periodic output from that list.

The original purpose for this chart wound up being unnecessary. I didn’t need to write on the bus any more. I don’t need to track the post count like this. I don’t need the randomiser. None of this stuff is in any way necessary.

But making this tool though, and playing with it, I have ways to engage with the project of this blog, with the writing when I can’t do that. When my ability to muster words has left me, I have still a chart, a tool, I have productivity items that I can work on. Sometimes just… fine tuning formulas is still working on it.

There’s this idea, maybe you’ve heard of ‘just do a little every day.’ Well, making it so there is a little you can do is really valuable, as part of that.

Check it out on PRESS.exe to see it with images and links!

[samuraionyourmom]

Been thinking about my Android Dazai AU lately. I've been asking myself a couple of questions about it since no one else seems to 😒 /lh (if you have any questions, please send them in, I beg. I yearn to yap). I've been mostly asking myself these questions to help me flesh out this AU better, and I thought I'd share my process.

If you haven't heard about it, you can check out my other posts about it here as well as the fic I made for it!

So, anyway, onto my ramblings. Prepare for an info dump and a half.

I'm sticking with the main question I've been asking myself for this post, and that is:

Why did Mori create Dazai? Why not just stick with Elise? What are his motivations?

This has been one of the toughest questions I've been faced with when I imagine this AU. It stumped me for a long while, so I just ignored it for the time being. But after a deep analysis of Mori's character, I've come to a conclusion.

Right off the bat, I'd like to make it clear that Mori has no creepy or pedophilic reasons for creating Dazai in this AU, so throw that thought away. I don't want to hear about it.

For starters, I'd like to lay out who Mori is as a person. Or how I view him, anyway. Deep down, Mori longs to take care of someone. We see this in Beast when he's free from his duties as Boss and is able to open up an orphanage. He states that he wishes he could have saved Dazai instead of manipulating him like he did.

But as it currently stands in the main timeline, Mori is unable to indulge in this desire. He is a slave to the organization, as he puts it, and he has a duty to go with the most logical solution as its leader. Facts over feelings and all that. Whether that means pushing Yosano to her limit despite his own hatred for using fear as a way to control people or sacrificing Oda, someone who he knows is very dear to Dazai, for the sake of obtaining the permit.

All this to say that Mori is very repressed. Personally, I say that these secret desires manifest themselves in Elise. She has some of Yosano and Dazai’s characteristics, both people Mori wish he could've cared for properly, and he spoils her openly, almost as if he's trying to make up for lost time.

Now, back to the AU. Elise's existence allows Mori to indulge in his fantasies, yes, but he wants something tangible. Elise is a manifestation of his own wants, but she's not real. So Mori decides to make an android. Maybe it's in a moment of weakness, so desperate for something, anything, to care for to make up for the pain he's caused.

Why not just adopt a child? Well, as much as he would like to, having a child in the Port Mafia isn't a wise decision, morally or logically. So he settles for an artificial one. It's different enough from Elise because it's something that can just vanish into thin air like she does. Something physical.

He works tirelessly to design, engineer, and produce an android that can give him as close to what he wants as possible. Not a baby, though. He couldn't bear that. He settles on a young teen for the design (again, not for creepy reasons, you weirdos). Something that he could care for, but isn't entirely helpless.

I imagine the first thing Mori did was create the AI for this thing before working on the body, and suddenly, this AI just starts yapping at him from his computer. The android takes on a life of their own. Starts calling themselves "Osamu Dazai." Orginally, Mori was set on creating a feminine-leaning android (his failures with Yosano are still haunting him at this point), but Dazai's like: uh, hell no. I am Osamu Dazai. I am a boy. Fix my body, u stupid doctor. (I love transzai)

Anyway, Dazai helps Mori design the body he wants. It's more androgynous than before, which Dazai enjoys. He's implemented into it shortly after it's finished, and voila, our favorite little bandage boy, is born.

Sure, Dazai isn't exactly what Mori had envisioned when he first started the project. He had imagined something more docile, easier to project his desires onto. But Dazai is what he is, and he won't be changed now. He's here now, and he's here to stay. Very human, despite how he came into this world or how much he denies it.

I may or may not have been influenced by the recent release of the Stormbringer Manga with that last bit. Anyway, Dad Mori is real. He's just not very good at it.

[neflil]

Aah here is the text post...

The usual couple doodles ::D

And future projects / catching up vv

*taps mic* Yaelokre gabbro makes a return. Also new song is out! Go listen to it if you haven't jshfjjs

Just gabbooo :3c

Okay so, gather up everyone. Schools started, I suddenly have to study and memorize two latin texts within a few days, history, and ancient Greek philosophy analyses and translations. Not fun, kinda! I don't have as much time as I did during summer and I can't finish a full drawing within a day. *But* ideas are as vivid as ever. And honestly I really want to do some of the stuff I'm imagining. Some are already in the works !!! These are mostly gabbro/time buddies related. Sorry fans of other characters but I spent the entire summer only drawing slate </3

Sooo... What to expect from me? Well:

• I'm writing a short fic! Which is close to being done- Without saying much- a replay of certain memories before the eventual death/creation of everything.

• I am currently doing an OC piece with two owlks ::D this should probably be next post if I finish it soon!

• More short animatics. Cus I have... So many songs... That I want to draw with the time buddies. Short ranging from a couple of seconds, to maybe a minute, so don't expect much. All I'll say is- guhhh y'all better enjoy flower face because all of these are with her songs lmfao..

> There are two songs atleast that I want to make almost full animatics, but that's probably not going to happen, so instead I'll take sections from them.

> Two lyrics from the same song I made last time buddies animatic. Cus I had a vision and I must fulfil it. If this continues, at this rate I'll animate the entire song every time I get struck with a vision, part by part lmfao.

> A possible gabbro centric animatic with the chorus of a song.

• And well, more school doodles/drawings ofc.. but those are kinda random. Please, if you have any suggestions drop them in my ask box!

• A certain fic might get an animatic. I won't elaborate on this. Patience.

• Lastly Mica and Slate piece, bc apparently I've never drawn them and that should be a crime. Some fluff to break up all this incoming angst.

These have a priority list ofc, but the way I work is pretty much spontaneous. So whatever I'm up for will take priority. It'll take time but I hope to have finished all of these within the next couple of months. We'll see how things go... I also have to balance other things and art in-between so blehhh. It's a mess.

Reminder if anyone wants to browse through my art easier without having to go through my entire account- the tag #noofposting is here for that reason. o7

Also also, since I now have these two animatics and more to come- to not get lost in my acc, I'll also tag them with #noofanimatics to be able to filter through my stuff easier.