#i am back heifers!

[plasticfangtastic]

Dairy Girl

A Homelander X F! Reader fanfic

A/N: I am still working on my other projects but I just wanted to write something fun and light to get me back into writing. I hope y'all enjoy this short little piece, btw i aint got no kids so i have very little idea how milk banks work, this will be a 2 or 3 part story.

Synopsis: In order to provide a constant supply of fresh breastmilk for Vought’s number one hero, Vought has had to get quite nifty in order to prevent this secret desire out the press and the public– you have unfortunately discovered the truth.

Tags: Stockholm Syndrome, abusive dynamic, Homelander being Homelander, dub-con, dark, mild smut, breastfeeding kink, kidnapping, child-death mention tw, cheating tw, set in s4 but canon nothing, slow burn.

Word Count: 3K

Part 1– Heifer

Such a small box, smaller than a shoe box, just big enough to fit its contents with enough space for his ghost to move. You stared at the small box as its buried in the family plot… you never thought of visiting this place to ever bury the last shred of happiness you had left, his body was born weak, so small you wonder if you’d given birth to a child or a chick, 2 months ago you had come home to find your now ex in bed with his ex, he had turned this betrayal on its head and blamed you for it, something about your lack of desire lately, about how your pregnancy had given him amounts of pressures he'd never agreed with, talking endlessly about his needs and how much you’d ignored him.

Whoever this man was, you didn’t recognize him.

Time blurred into nothing but disconnected colors and shapes, all you know was that the stress and anguish lead to this.

A box under soil.

Days passed and in your empty apartment, surrounded by all the stuff you bought you stood in front of the sink, throwing a bottle of fresh milk down the drain feeling tremendous guilt, the doctor said you would dry out soon enough but your breast had swollen so much your bras no longer fit– even the spare ones you bought just in case they’ve grown a size too big from what you expected, you booked an appointment with your doctor hoping they could give you whatever cocktail of drugs to dry you out and save you from the pressure and pain in your chest, it had been nothing but a passing message from a worried neighbor who had stop by to give you some mail that had been sent to them by accident when she mentioned her daughter-in-law had donated her excess milk after her little one refused to latch, she gave you the name of the charity and after much thinking you gave in, you lost your baby but there was some woman out there who could end up experiencing your same grief if their baby starved to death, yours simply born too small and weak to hold your finger for very long.

It felt good, you met the women running the charity and even some of the faces of the women you helped, as you delivered your frozen packs to the women’s clinic where the charity operated, it helped you heal, it gave your pain purpose, but as the months faded behind you a part of you worried about how much you keep producing, less than before but still too much, yet you keep going knowing it would end soon enough. 

Perhaps somebody in the clinic or the charity had dropped your information to these people but you'd received some mail regarding some research trials Vought International was running and how they needed some donors to drop fresh samples, in their pamphlet they offered to pay a decent amount--your divorce had been costly plus having to move to a new place and breaking your previous lease had left your bank account quite dry, this was cheap money, you had given your milk for free, you looked at the few pouches you had collected for next week's drop you saw a wonderful opportunity to make some quick cash.

You went to the Vought Clinic and saw a few other women filling up forms, reading old magazines or dilly-dallying on their phones until some nurse called their numbers, you filled the medical form, waited less than half an hour before your number was called, brought into a small bleach scented room, the nurse read your form and told you she would take a blood sample, a doctor came in, reciting whatever script he’d been given about what this project was, giving you big words you had no interest in, this was about providing better milk formulas closer to natural milk than anything currently in the market apparently, thanking you for your donation, he looked at your form smiling as he saw your inked words.

“You're still producing 4 months after…” The doctor handed you a disinfecting wipe and a freshly steamed breast pump in a silver tray– we just need two samples, please press the alarm to let us know you’d finished, then follow Nurse Potts to the front counter to sort out your payment.”

It had been an awkward experience, but there you were 300 dollars richer, you probably should’ve read those papers a bit closer before signing but money was money and you were told to come back if you could.

You did it a couple times for 2 months, much like a man donating sperm for pocket money or plasma to pay the rent.

That was the first mistake, you headed home and woke up the morning after wishing you had stayed out for an extra hour or two, perhaps caved in to your friends pressures and tried going back to dating (after all your ex was whoring himself all across the lower east side without moral qualms) or hookups so you would had gone to a different address, maybe you should had taken a taxi instead of taking the train and walking home.

Regardless you woke in some strange empty room, the only thing beside your person was a pair of pale pink hospital gowns, grippy socks, clean underwear and a pair of thick large towels, you screamed and banged on the door for an ungodly amount of time but nobody ever came, you stayed alone in that room for what could have been 12 hours or more… maybe less… who knew it was all too much, suddenly a sharp sound cut into the silence a note had been slid under the door, you rushed to the note.

It was instructions, they wanted you wearing their clean clothes, you could not leave the room unless you did so, and as much as you hated the idea, you wanted to get out so badly, you knew if you wanted to escape your only chance came in knowing your surroundings, you begrudgingly and tearfully changed, waiting until anything changed– the doors hissed opened, a woman in a sharp cream coloured suit stood there with clipboard and an armed guard, at the sight of the heavy looking gun– you froze.

Then you took the first step towards hell.

You knew the following things: You lived in some basement area– there were no windows, only elevators. You weren’t alone, there were other women here and they made sure to keep your interactions at minimum no doubt to keep all of you submissive and not getting any ideas, sometimes familiar faces will fade and you could only speculate nightmares. Lastly… your purpose, the reason you were trapped here in the first place was… to lactate.

A plucky little thing that stayed optimistic despite your shared horror called herself a ‘Heifer’ she wasn’t wrong… you lived in a small cell where everything had sat on top of each other feed to keep fat and producing milk much like a cow, whoever developed this diet knew of all the ingredients known to help production, and you knew there were putting something else in the food for your breast begun to feel uncomfortable, for a little while you thought you could fight it by starving yourself, then two men with guns came into the room and told you to eat or else.

The time you spend outside this microflat hong-kong style cell was in the milking room and the shower room, you were ordered to stay clean and quiet, at least in the milking room you had some television and could spend time with the other women, but they keep you isolated, you could do very little, sometimes music would play and a book would be dropped with your food but your happiness wasn’t priority, you had to fill a quota.

After a couple weeks of this you simply accepted defeat, too many guns… not enough spaces to run, and nothing to come home to… a man that wanted to sue you for more feeling as if the judge had been unfair, a pestering family who acted as if they had been the only ones who experience loss, an empty cot you still hadn’t gotten rid off and piles and piles of bills, in this quiet cool room you had spend endless hours thinking, you didn’t love your job, you had been distant from most of your friends and you could only imagine that they assumed you had run away or killed yourself after what happened nobody could blame you.

Existing for the sake of existing until you could figure out what to do next.

“Good Evening… I’m glad you’re eating so well” The lady you met the first day said as the door hissed open, she watched you like a hawk as you process this sudden interruption, clutching at your paper thin blanket, you looked at the floral fabric in her arms and the clipboard under her arm– I need you to sign this before you’re allowed upstairs”

“Am I being let out?” You said anxiously, no way it could be that easy you thought.

The lady let her smile waiver, looking at the unseen guard then at her wrist watch as she handed you the clipboard.

“Your performance might determine how soon you'll be release…”

“You assume I won’t go to the police…”

“That wouldn’t be wise Miss L/N but we assure you that you’ll be sufficiently compensated for the inconvenience.”

You wanted to yell, but a voice in the back of your head thought of this but nothing but pageantry, you were dead either way, but perhaps this could be your opportunity to escape, whatever they wanted to do now meant being outside of these buried walls, you signed the sheet without thinking, briefly considered stabbing the bitch in the eye but is likely they would turn you into swiss cheese before you even took a step too close, she took the paperwork from your hands and in change handed you a long sleeved dressed straight out of the mormon section in target, she closed the door and you dressed up.

The halls looked so odd when you didn’t wear your prison clothes, the other few doors housed sleeping and bored girls, your plucky friend hidden behind one of them, the new girl hidden behind one of them and the girl you seen before in the milking room once hid behind one of them.

They took you to an elevator– it was old box, if you had to guess by the button’s design maybe built in the late or mid 70s, you never left their side until the elevator closed before them, the box moved slowly, a dingy silver box with low honey coloured lights, so dim… and you were alone, as the light chime as it went up you felt your entire being sink into your stomach, your heart beating so fast you were sure you were gonna have a heart attack before the doors opened once again, swallowing dry spit, your eyes opened so wide it hurt.

Quiet… it was so quiet when the doors opened, you expected something else, something menacing… something frightening– not an old house, an old house in the middle of some evergreen forest, everything screams old, untouched, museum like, like it's meant to present this idea that somebody lives here but not really, despite it being an elevator hidden behind a bookcase, you take a few cautious steps, your naked feet bury in the plush carpet, there’s bird singing outside and the sun is so bright and warm it hurts your eyes, the cool tones gone and this feels like a bad dream, pinching yourself but you’re awake, tragically awake, a weird wiry smile creeps on your lips, an almost laugh escapes your lips before you can feel tears burning your eyes.

“Hello…?” You ask and you don’t know why.

As you venture into the living room, hands firm against the tacky dark pink wallpaper, you found old floral couches that matched the drapes and despite how old school it was it had a charm to it.

Then you saw him.

Perusing the VHS collection filled the entire bookcase on the wall, just rows and rows of VHS boxes, some plastic and some cardboard, the TV boxy and just as antiquated but who cared— he was there.

You ran before you even realized you done it, crashing into him with desperation, tears staining your cheeks and you could barely breath as you tried so hard to speak.

“Homelander please help me!! I’ve been kidnapped!! Please!!” You cried, pulling on his suit– please!!”

Those endlessly blue eyes more poison dart hide than veronica flower bush the more they stared at you calmly, his lips into a thin smile and his hand thad taken your wrist inflicting just enough force to keep you firmly in his grip… to show you how he wasn’t an ordinary man, he looked at you as your tears changed meaning as if you were the most unfortunate creature he’d ever seen, his lips parted just enough to show those sharp canines that had looked so charming in sidewalk posters, now you could sense their presence squeezing at your jugular.

“You are so much prettier in person, Y/N.” His voice is disturbingly soft and calm, intimately quiet as he takes a whiff of your neck, moving you to make it easier, his free hand creeped towards your hip– I was so glad when I saw your picture and you weren’t hideous.”

Trembling against him, a nonexistent cold draft blew against you, your whole body shivering and covered in goosebumps.

His eyes fixated in your breast, mouth agape as his tongue dared to lick his lip, watching you like a starved man at a las vegas buffet, his hand slithering upwards, you know where this is leading, you can’t stop crying but you can’t scream either, you're just there as his hand avoids your breasts and creeps towards your back and presses your bodies together.

“I’m so glad you signed that sheet, I was getting sad endlessly waiting for one of you to agree to the deal” He says quietly, you stare at him and you realize you should’ve actually read that stupid sheet– why so scared? I ain’t gonna bite.” He bites the air as a joke and you could tell that that single bite could have torn your finger off cleanly.

His eyes shift to your clinging fingers that stayed so stiff against his padded suit, you stopped squeezing at him now they rested limp against him.

“Let’s watch a movie…” 

It’s an awkward dance concluding in sitting down on a couch, its surprisingly soft and you’re sinking on the cushion while your mind dissolved in the sky, the coffee table had a humbled spread of snacks, pizza and milkshakes, not once did you notice, you stared at him clutching at your dress as he picked something out of the shelve, watching as his hand worked the VHS player, the clicks and whirling all you could focus on. He sat beside you as the speakers began to play the included trailers, he took the drink urging you to do the same with a menacing look, filling you with incomplete thoughts as you obeyed.

Malt vanilla marinated in your tongue, you had a terrible thought.

‘Milk’ 

You were there to provide milk… to whom? Why just milk? You thought they would sell your body or your organs, experiment on you but… they wanted your milk, but who was buying it? Who was drinking it? Where did it go? You stared at the pretty blond whose arm kept your shoulders still, you saw the news– you’d known he had a child and who knows with whom but his kid was old enough to not need it… was it for him? You thought… thinking of it as ridiculous until you remember how 20 minutes ago  he was staring at your tits as if he was malnourished, you looked at his lips pursing as he took a long sip of his milkshake and wonder if that was milk… from a cow… not a heifer like you.

Homelander smiled at you.

“I don’t like ‘The mothman prophecy’ , never been a Richard Gere fan” he said casually.

“He was really good in ‘Pretty Woman’ . This one is okay…” You looked at the screen your voice so stiff– what’s going on…? Mr. Homelander… I…"

“Shhh… watch the movie” He leaned against you resting his head on your shoulder– you tasted the best… every batch perfection– such delicate custardy taste… So this is what we are gonna do… I’ll keep you in this floor so you’re not so bored ."

You swear he’s purring as he rubs himself against you marking you as much as he was making himself comfortable.

“There’s cameras everywhere… The glass is bulletproof, doors won’t open without a fob and code, and there’s no phones or internet, but if you do manage to get out of here just be aware I’ll know.” He said such terrible things as if it was nothing– if you tried to off yourself there will be 3 armed guards and nurses here in less than a minute but if you behave I promise you– you’ll be allowed out, but only if you gain my trust.” He looks up at you as you focus on those thin lips of his– there’s no kitchen but your meals will be delivered… if you want anything just tell the camera over there.”

He pointed at the corner tucked in between two VHS tapes was a small camera.

“I like you Y/N you're cute… you’ll behave for me, right?”

You nodded, too afraid to disagree.

“Now… let’s finish the movie… I actually like this part”

You stared at the pizza box, you could at least tell that the pizza was from an american restaurant, which made you feel safe ‘Select Pizza and Grill” said in the box and you knew you were somewhere in Pennsylvania, far from your apartment in Clinton Hill.

You looked at your boobs feeling his piercing gaze on them, you started drawing lines connecting weird things together, back when you were donating your milk, girls joked about people buying for medicinal and fetish purposes, this spelled itself out for you.

Maybe you could get out of here… but you had to do something weird… but as you heard the birds outside and the warm light peeked into the room, you realized maybe you could leave… no you’ll leave, you’ll go back home and you would find a way to ruin this man and those bastards beneath you, you’ll get them out too, so you took one courageous breath and forced a smile on your dried lips.

“You really liked it?”

“Huh?”

“My milk…” You mumbled– you know I never tasted it myself but am glad to get a review.”

“It’s really tasty” he bites his lip.

Your hand plays with one of the buttons on the dress.

“It hurts a bit… I usually get asked to pump around this time… dunno if you know this but it's a bit painful when they get this swollen.”

The look in his eyes told you everything you needed to know and as you leaned away from him pulling on buttons with slightly trembling fingers, you watched him follow your movements like a snake chasing prey.

“Would you help me out, mister superhero?” Is not flirty but is slightly playful and you’re surprised that you can lie that well, he’s so shameless as he shakes his head enthusiastically, mouth opening for you– please don’t bite.”

He gasps as you let him see all that he’d wanted from the get go, why he put you in that box, why you ended up in this place for.

His body was lighter than you thought as he sunk against you-- eyes closed, body limp against yours, he made the softest sounds it put you at ease somehow, for a moment you saw a very small being latched on your chest, you’d only experienced it once before, and it was seared into your mind as a painful yet tender memory, so you close your eyes dreaming of a fantasy far removed from this peculiar reality, half lid eyes found a man so blissed out your lips curved, this was unbelievable, the world most famous supe keeping you hostage just so you could indulged him.

But you knew now… that this was your way out.

[bearbirth]

You know those agricultural expos where you can watch a cow give birth? What if that, but a cowgirl instead? And she's enjoying all of the attention *very* much. All of those people, here just to see her have her calf? She'd better give them a good show~

I just saw this and it’s been on my mind all day!! I love cow girls~! Let’s do this!!

“Mooooooo!” I can hear labored mooing and moans in the stalls next to me. I’m a breed cow girl, made to birth stronger cows for farms. Most of the other heifers don’t enjoy giving birth, but secretly I do. My short brown hair contrasts nicely with my white ears and tail. I have on a skimpy little cow print bikini and that’s it. My large belly is swollen with a calf that is too large for a normal human to carry. I rub my belly gently, I’ve been in labor since the night before. I walk around my pen, doing little stretches as onlookers watch.

“Mmmrooooooo….!”

I moo out in pain as a sudden contraction hits me. I lean up against a mount made for me to hold onto. As I breathe through it, my water pops. A fluids trickle out of me but I don’t seem to notice at all. I’m too into the process. The calf is coming NOW. The people watching start to gather when they realize what’s going on. It won’t be long till I’m pushing out a huge calf.

“Hoooo… hooooooooo…”

Half an hour after the water broke and I’m breathing hard. The half’s head has passed through my cervix. It’s massive. I’m blushing so hard as people take photos. I’m waddling around, mooing and moaning loudly. My tail flicks happily as I’m watched. I just love the attention birthing gets me.

“MOOOOOOOO!!!!!” I bear down again, the body coming down now. With how large the full sized calf is the head is forced to my entrance. My skin bulges out and I am now forced to squat while holding the bar. My legs shake, I’m excited. More people are watching.

“M-Mroooo! MOOOOOOOO MROOOOOOOOO!!” I push again, mooing as the snout of the calf pushes out. The head follows fast as it crowns causing me to scream my moo’s instead. I look back, seeing everyone watching my entrance stretch. “Mmhhh~! Mooooooo!!!!” I give it another push, wiggling my little butt like I’m trying to get the head out. It’s so painful~! It slips out with a gush of fluids. But that was the easy part. A contraction rips through me soon after and I squat again. The body is massive. I sob and cry, my hips bouncing which makes the bell collar I have in jingle. The body slowly begins to stretch me open. But it’s slow and painful. People are filming me and praising me for my work. I can’t help but push again even without a contraction, my tail moving up to show the body slipping out.

“NNNNRRROOOOOO MRRRRHHHH GAHHH!” I yelp as the massive calf slides out of me. People are cheering. I turn around and do a little polite bow, smiling happily as I sit down to nurse my new calf.

[angelwings-crossbowstrings]

Chapter 9

Series Masterlist

Warnings: Brief mentions of pregnancy and pregnancy symptoms

A/N: Not quite as long as previous chapters but I digress.

Moodboard by @dannyo000 💙

You heard voices surrounding you, some loud and urgent while others almost whispered. You knew them, that was for certain but the stygian fog shrouding your consciousness forbade you from seeking information you knew you had. You were too tired to care, never even opening your eyes before you once again surrendered to oblivion. 

The second time you became aware, it was quick. Your eyes opened, a reflex to the fear that immediately took hold and had you trying to sit up. You didn’t get far. You were so weak; your arms refused to hold your weight. When you collapsed back onto the soft pillow, something in your right arm pinched. It didn’t exactly hurt, but it did draw your attention to the tubing running from the crook of your elbow up to a clear bag hanging from the bedpost. 

“You’re awake.”

Your head rolled to the left, wide eyes meeting the soft gaze of an older gentleman. The first thing you noticed was that he was so clean, dressed in a nice button-up and black trousers. His white hair was neatly combed and clearly cared after. Your confusion must have been distinctly written across your face because he went on with providing a little more detail. 

“My name is Hershel. You were brought here in quite the state, young lady. You were severely dehydrated. Quite honestly, I still fear that there may be some damage to your kidneys but we will just need to wait and see.”

You were still so tired. “Where the hell am I?” The man—- Hershel —-pinned you with a chastising stare but it disappeared just as quickly. 

“You’re in my home.”

You didn’t acknowledge the reply, adjusting your gaze to the ceiling. You didn’t remember much aside from the pain. 

And Daryl. 

Those eyes—blue like a mountain lake—had been brimming with concern; and then determination. He had brought you there. You knew he had to be terrified for—

“The baby!” You suddenly gasped, palms pressed hard over your stomach. “Is my baby okay?!”

Hershel was already holding up his hands in a placating gesture, nodding slowly. “I’m aware. Your husband filled me in on everything. Quite crudely, I might add.” 

You snorted weakly. “He’s not my husband.” 

Hershel’s gaze wandered over to the far side of the room, a low, steady hum emitting from behind closed lips. “I see. Well, in any case, I happen to have a POCUS machine here for use on the springing heifers. Now, I’m no medical doctor, but I was able to locate the fetus and a strong heartbeat. Your baby seems to be healthy, though I can make no guarantees.”

You let out a breath you didn’t realize you were holding, fingertips absently brushing back and forth over your abdomen. “You said you’re not a medical doctor.”

“That’s correct.”

You pulled a face, willing your tired brain to fill in the blanks before Hershel could simply tell you. A lightbulb sparked to life. “You’re a vet.”

“I am.” He moved around the bed, carefully eyeing the tubing connected to your arm and then the bag. He seemed concerned but said nothing. “You need to rest. We’re going to try to get some bland food in you along with some water. Of course, I’ve never had to treat hyperemesis gravidarum but I have medical journals that will help.”

You raised your head slightly, an inquisitive eyebrow arched. “Hyper who the what?”

He chuckled, making his way toward the door. “That’s exactly what your—whatever your relationship is. Anyway, that’s exactly what he said.” He motioned toward the far corner of the room, where his gaze had ventured moments before. Curiosity got the better of you and you forced yourself up, one arm at a time to rest on your elbows. Your arms trembled with the effort. It didn't matter because you were too overwhelmed by the warm feeling stirring in your chest. 

Daryl was slumped in a chair, chin on his chest, and fast asleep. 

“He hasn’t left this room.” The veterinarian offered, turning toward the door. “The condition is severe nausea and vomiting. From my reading, it’s hard to control even with medication. You’ll likely need fluids periodically throughout your pregnancy. We’ll discuss this more once you’ve regained some strength. For now, rest, sips of water, and small, bland meals.”

Your stomach churned at just the thought. “I’ll just throw it all up.”

He nodded in agreement, but didn’t seem pessimistic. “I’ve discussed this with him,” Hershel tilted his head toward the sleeping hunter. “My daughter has a list and will be leaving tomorrow morning to gather what we need. The Korean boy will be accompanying her.” He nodded and stepped over the threshold before you called out. 

“Is Carl okay?”

“He’s not completely out of the woods but I expect he’ll make a full recovery.” 

That made you smile. At least one of the children would be okay. With the information you were just given, you still worried for your own baby. “Thank you, Hershel.”

With a tight smile, he nodded and closed the door. 

You laid back and let everything digest. You were going to have 7 months or so of what sounded like pure hell. You’d need access to constant medication. And the man couldn’t even guarantee that the baby in your belly was indeed healthy. If ever you felt like a burden to the group, it was at that moment. 

Would they even allow you to stay?

You placed both hands on your belly and rubbed in soft circles. “You’ve decided to start giving me hell early, huh, little thumper?���

“Lil’ thumper?” 

You raised your head as far as you could, finding Daryl sitting on the edge of the chair with his elbows on his knees while he wiped the sleep from his eyes. He looked exhausted despite having just been asleep. 

He hasn’t left this room. 

“Hey.” Your smile was feeble at best. Your body felt heavy and it ached, but the cramping had mercifully stopped. The hunter gave a slight nod to greet you just before he stood to stretch, his joints protesting. “How long have I been here?”

“Just over a day.” Your eyes tracked him crossing the room. When he was close enough, he snatched up the unused pillow. Leaning forward with one knee on the mattress, he slid a hand under the back of your head to assist you with sitting up. The second pillow was placed behind you and left you at least elevated enough to hold a conversation in relative comfort. 

Your eyes downcast, you muttered a quiet thank you. Daryl simply nodded, shifting from foot to foot in a nervous cadence, likely unsure of what to do. 

He suddenly cleared his throat. “Think ya can drink some water?” 

Until that moment, you hadn’t paid any mind to how dry your mouth was. “Yeah. Yeah, I can try.” 

The archer nodded, bringing his thumb to his mouth to chew on the side all the way around the bed where a glass of water was sitting on a bedside table. He removed the digit from his mouth in favor of fetching the drink. 

Daryl held it out to you, eyeing your trembling hand lifting to accept it. “Wait.” He settled his hip on the edge of the mattress and brought the glass to your lips. “You’re gonna spill it if ya try by yourself.” With an aggrieved whine, you parted your lips so he could tip the glass. When he tried to take it away after a mere two sips, you brought your hand up to hold it in place, yearning for just a little more. “Nuh uh. Can’t have too much. Tryin’ ta keep it all on the inside.” 

Bottom lip jutted out, you decided you weren’t beyond begging—until you realized your hand was covering his on the glass. Your need was promptly forgotten. You watched Daryl’s gaze follow your appendage but he placed the glass back on the table without commenting.

Probably for the best. 

He didn’t remain on the bed long after that. Rubbing his palms over his thighs, he stood and walked over to the window, pushing the curtain aside.  

“Did you, uh, get to see it?” You asked, needlessly smoothing the blankets over your lap. Daryl looked at you questioningly. “The baby. Did you get to see?”

“Mhm.” He looked back out the window. “Didn’t really know what I’s s’posed ta be looking at. There was this lil’—” he made a gesture with his hand that you weren’t sure how to interpret, “I dunno, like a flashing. He said it was the heartbeat.”

You hummed and brushed your fingers over your belly again. “Wish I could’ve seen it.”

“Mhm.” He nodded but kept his eyes on whatever he was watching outside, if there really was anything there at all. There was a sudden discontent in the air; the same thick tension you had felt in the truck that first day after he found you. 

“He said you stayed the whole time.”

“Course I did.” His voice had lowered to a point where you were surprised you could hear him. “S’my kid in there. Needed to make sure ev’rything was okay. We don’t know these people.”

It felt like a punch to the gut. You had been telling yourself all along that the baby was all Daryl cared about. He’d almost made that perfectly clear, until the forest. Something in his eyes had shifted, and the way he spoke to you. He had been so coarse up until you admitted that you had been wrong. Then his touches were gentle, his voice even more so. 

But now, you wondered if maybe you had imagined it. You chewed on your lip, glancing up at him every few seconds. It might finally be the right time. You had no doubt that he would stop you if it wasn’t. 

“I’m really sorry, Daryl.” You willed him to look at you; it was imperative that he actually witnessed your sincerity. You had never meant to hurt him. 

“‘Bout what?” He asked, just before he obliged your unspoken request. He started to turn back to the window but it appeared he thought better of it and held your gaze. 

“I only knew for less than a day.” You waited to be dismissed; for him to snap at you and stomp out of the room. 

He did neither. 

You slowly repositioned yourself, suddenly uncomfortable under his stare. He was giving you his attention; finally hearing what you had to say, only for you to be terrified to continue. 

“I, um—I found out from the blood test. I went to see Jenner after supper. I came to tell you that night but—I got scared and then you kissed me and I—” you lowered your head, the stark white sheet suddenly very interesting. “I’m just sorry. I'm sorry you had to find out the way you did. I should have told you.”

The silence carried on, suffocating and loud. You were certain he could hear the intensity of your thundering heart from across the room. A tear tickled your skin as it cascaded down your cheek, almost conjuring a laugh when you realized you were hydrated enough to actually cry. 

“S’okay.” Your wet, shining eyes locked on him immediately. He was looking out the window again, but somehow looked calmer. That tenseness in his stance had softened. “I shouldn’a been such a asshole.”

You gave a wet laugh, the acceptance of your apology having more of an effect on you than you could have imagined. Naturally, Daryl was looking at you with an inquisitive brow arched. “I’m not laughing at you.” You assured him with a useless gesture, waving your hands. “Hormones, I guess?”

There was a very slow nod that meant I have no idea what that means but I’ll take your word for it. He watched you nervously until the waterworks dried up, seemingly afraid to approach while you were having your moment. You were still sniffling when he sat down on the edge of the mattress again and grabbed the water glass. “A lil’ more an’ I’ll go down to see what we can do ‘bout some food for ya.”

And right on cue, your stomach rumbled while your cheeks reddened. 

Hershel had discovered some Odansetron in his supplies and was able to work out a safe dose for you with the help of the medical journals. It had made you a little drowsy but not so much so that you didn’t laugh and smile broadly when the waves of nausea all but ceased for the first time in days! 

Daryl brought you one scrambled egg and half a piece of toast with no butter. He was forced to snatch away your fork when you almost crammed the entirety of the egg in your mouth in one bite. 

“Slow down. Ain’t nobody gonna take it from ya. Jesus.” He handed the utensil back after you promised to take your time. It was difficult but you managed to keep that promise. 

Now you were curled up under the sheets, eyes heavy and stomach full. You felt better than you had since first arriving into the small group. Sleepy, but better. The fluids would continue at least throughout the night, Hershel had said. He would give you another injection of the antiemetic when it was time, just to keep your symptoms under control until his daughter could hopefully find some in tablet form. 

The room was near silent, which didn’t bother you now that Daryl had heard your apology and accepted it. He may only be worrying about his baby but he at least wasn’t angry with you anymore. You still had a lot to talk about but it was more related to planning for childbirth and parenting during an apocalypse. So, for now, you melted into the bed and closed your eyes. 

Daryl yawned from the chair in the corner. Your eyes were quick to open. The hunter had protected you, had been protecting you from the moment he carried you out of the woods. How cruel was it for you, pregnant or not, to be in a nice, cozy bed while he was slumped in a very uncomfortable-looking chair. 

“Hey, Daryl?” You didn’t move from the comfortable position you had found but you were able to call out loud enough for him to hear. He grunted in reply, which you wanted to chuckle at for whatever reason. “Can you come over here for a sec?” 

There was a sigh before you heard the chair slightly shift when he rose from it. He actually approached the side your back was turned toward, probably assuming you wanted the water glass. You were able to roll onto your other side, careful of the IV. You were definitely improving. That movement alone would have been impossible when you had first awakened. 

Daryl actually looked tired. Worry and near sleepless nights had that effect, you supposed. His hand wrapped around the glass but you extended yours before he could pick it up. 

“Thank you, but that’s not what I needed.” You smiled gently. 

“What is it then? Gettin’ up early to look for the girl. Need to get some sleep.”

You were careful about scooting backwards, maneuvering the tubing so it was against the headboard and not across the mattress. Situated comfortably, you lifted the blankets on the other side. 

“Get in.”

He arched a brow, the question of are you serious needn’t have been spoken aloud. 

“Ugh, always thinking with your dick.” You rolled your eyes and chuckled lightly. “No, I just want you to sleep here. I’ll keep my hands to myself.” Now his brow drew inward, skeptically. 

“Why?”

“Because I’m not sure I could even have sex right now—” 

“Not that.” He snorted and shook his head. “Why d’ya want me to sleep there?”

Did he just assume you didn’t want him near you because of everything? He never questioned any time you had wanted him buried inside you but looked honestly confused that you’d want him near you otherwise. “Because you need to rest too. It’s been crazy out there. But we’re safe right now—”

“Ain’t never safe.”

“Thanks, captain optimistic.” You deadpanned, releasing the sheets be keeping your hand splayed out on the mattress. “Seriously, whether or not it’s safe out there doesn’t matter. You make me feel safe. And I’d really like it if you’d sleep here.” When he didn’t answer immediately, you added a quiet please that seemed to break his resolve. 

"You’re ridiculous.” You were sure that was just the Daryl method of diffusing a situation that had become too uncomfortable for him to handle. Regardless, he sat down and began taking off his boots. You gave up the second pillow and snuggled back into your own, watching the soft light from the bedside lamp cause shadows to dance across him while he got comfortable. Of course, he opted to lie on his back on top of the blanket. 

“Better than the chair?” You were smiling smugly when he rolled his head toward you. He scoffed and returned his gaze to the ceiling. In seconds, his eyelids were drooping, along with your own. You took a deep, content breath and allowed yourself to relax and begin to give in to the call of sleep. 

Just as the last dregs of consciousness began to release their hold, you could have sworn you heard him say “much better than the chair.”

[deancasbigbang]

Arms Around His Angel

Author: blackhorsedances

Artist: stonelions

Rating: Explicit

Pairings: Castiel/Dean Winchester, Benny LaFitte/Garth Fitzgerald IV, Gabriel/Kali. Charlie Bradbury/Meg Masters; Jody Mills/Donna Hanscum. Past Dean and Lee Webb; Past Dean and Lisa Braeden; Past Dean and Benny LaFitte. Sam Winchester/Jess Winchester.

Length: 45831

Warnings: N/A

Tags: Alternate Universe. Inventor Castiel, Rancher Dean Winchester. Top Cas/Bottom Dean. Angst. Miscommunication. Hurt/Comfort. Smut. Fluff. Happy Ending.

Summary: “What’s Jack doing, Sam? Garth says he and Honeybee are out most days from breakfast until well after lunch. Jody says he packs peanut butter and banana sandwiches.” Sam shrugs. “He says he’s out visiting Mister Cas. I think he probably found the fort we built that one summer, and is holed up out there with sandwiches for his imaginary friends. Let it be, Dean. The heifers are out in the north pasture. The steers are in the east pasture. There’s nothing out by the fort to worry about.” “Snakes, Sam. There are snakes to worry about.” Sam looks at Dean across the kitchen island, and shakes his head, hair flopping over into his eyes. “You’re the one that told me that a mule will kill a snake faster than you can say ‘snake’, and I believe you because I’ve seen Honeybee do it. Let him be. Ben will be out of school in a couple of weeks, and he’ll be following Ben around like a puppy.” “Heh, you’re probably right.” Dean runs a hand down the back of his neck. “I know I am, Dean. You worry about all of us, but you worry too much. You can’t watch over everyone all of the time.”

Link to Fic | Link to Art

[dontforgetukraine]

Hryhoriy Bakalo, Photo - 1953

"I am Bakalo Hryhoriy Omelkovych. I was born at the end of 1923 in the village of Bohuslav. There were seven children in our family. We lived together with our grandfather and grandmother, Yavdokha.

We were not wealthy, but, for those times,we were not poor either. We were considered well-to-do. They demanded our father join the collective farm: they often came to our house and threatened him.

Little Vasyl was afraid of strangers and cried,so our mother took him out of the house. So he caught a cold and died.

When joining the collective farm, my father gave away the horses and all the livestock, so only a cow remained in our own household. As a successful owner, my father was appointed either foreman or head of the collective farm stable.

The farmers from the collective farm reluctantly accepted the collective farm (it could be called silent sabotage), and treated the collective farm poorly. A rider could leave a horse warmed up by running in the cold, etc.

In the end, poor care, lack of fodder, and unsuitable premises with the onset of autumn cold led to the death of horses. My father was accused of this.

He had an opportunity to "make amends": they offered him to organise the seizure of horses from those people who had not yet joined the collective farm. He did not agree, so he was arrested.

My father's arrest was a signal that a brigade would come to confiscate property.They came to us to seize our property on a horse-drawn sleigh (late November - early December 1932).This entire confiscation brigade included local peasants, but as they said, "not ours" led them.

It was very difficult to hide something from the brigade of collectors. They took everything with them, even clothes and canvas. They burned the icons right in the middle of the yard.

Using sticks, they found two sacks of wheat, one of flour, pine cones and seeds buried by my father in the yard. The utensils from the oven, including the dish in it, were also taken.

In total, they took eight carriages of goods (food, clothing, household goods, utensils, cloth, potatoes). They also took the cow, chickens, ducks - meat; before that, my father had slaughtered a heifer, so they took it too (it was hanging in the attic).

They did not find only the bag of flour, hidden in the barn under the barrel. I think that the older ones could have gone somewhere and there, maybe even survived, but they were "blacklisting" right after the arrest of our father. They were not allowed to leave the village.

Our mother cooked soup from the bag of flour left, and what she managed to exchange for clothes and jewelry (a necklace): water and a little flour...

By the spring, in February, when it got a little warmer, everyone was so exhausted that they could only lie down. Only I walked. I remember my sister calling: "Hrysha, go catch a frog and bring it to me."

I walked around the garden, went down to the river and then came back. "No," I said. And she asked: "Give me the scissors, I'll cut my hair and eat it." I handed over them and stood at a distance. She suddenly threw them at me, almost hitting me.

Later, my sister bit the skin on her fingers. Our mother beat her and wrapped her fingers with rags, but she took off the rags and again bit and sucked her fingers.

Our mother poured soup,and I carried it to my brothers.When I ate my share,I was sitting waiting, maybe,something else left for me.Mother:"Take it to Arkhyp." I brought it,and he said:"Put my bowl down,I don't need it." Then he died. Ivan didn't ask anything, he died quietly.

In March and April, everyone died except for me, Kolia and our mother. Our mother periodically, twice or even three times a week, went away to exchange that junk. And my brother and I wandered around the village.

My brother did not want to walk because he was thin, his legs and arms were like sticks, and his stomach was huge and transparent: the liver and intestines were visible.

My father returned seven months later after he had been taken away, in May, unshaven for seven months, scary, barely able to move his swollen legs wrapped in rags. My mother wasn't at home.

And I said: "Dad, now we will survive - there are only four of us: you, mom, Kolia, and me," and Father only replied: "They took all my strength there." The next morning, he went to the collective farm to sharpen scythes.

In the evening, he brought a quarter of a beet and some soup - he earned for the day. He gave it to us, told us to eat little by little, and lay down and wheezed. Foam came out of the mouth and nose. I ran to our neighbour, saying: "Something is wrong with dad."

She came, looked - "your father died." She covered him with a black blanket. He had been lying like that for two days until our mother came. Everything she earned was spent on the coffin and digging the grave..."

The carriage came to take him to the cemetery, and our neighbour came, asking: "Take my Pylyp to the cemetery too (the neighbour's son was my age). As I won't be able to take him there..." They took Pylyp away. On the way, someone else was taken away.

A storm broke out there. Thunder, lightning, rain, wind. The diggers quickly left. My mother covered the hole with her own hands..."

Source: Holodomor Museum

[its-in-the-woods]

Coyote Head - Part 5 - Livestock Is Deadstock

master list

Part 1, Part 2, Part 3, Part 4

Pairing: Cooper Howard x Lucy Maclean 

Includes many other characters from Fallout

Synopsis: Calf check doesn't go as planned. But brings out two main characters closer.

MINOR GET OUT. Rating/Warning:  Animal/people death, Stillb0rn animal, Horror, blOod/G0re, nightmares, Alternative Universe, Slow Burn, Death, Aging, Family Feuding, Eventually (I swear to the universe it will happen): Older Man/Younger Woman

Note: that I will not be spoiling any of the reading. So you have been warned. I will keep my tags relevant without spoiling what is happening in the story.

** Thank you for your patience! I basically rewrote this entire chapter about 4 times before the characters were happy with it. Little under 4k words. Enjoy*

Flag in hand, Lucy watches the Mama cow as her little munchkin makes a fuss. The thing is squirming, mooing, and rolling trying to get anywhere but where he was. Cooper works quickly, tagging, vaccinating, and wash of minerals. Then go as fast as possible before Mama charges.

“You're a’right Mama, you won’t be mad at me in a few months,” Cooper chuckles, as they speed away in the side-by-side.  

“Forgot how testy they could be” Lucy smiles, scanning the horizon for any signs of fresh calves. 

“Don’t tell anyone, but I like it when they are a little wild,” Cooper’s face lighting up with a big smile at the comment. Lucy feels her heart jump as she smiles back at him, noting that down for later. 

“Makes them good Mamas, especially with all the coyotes around,” Lucy adds, pointing towards a mama calf standing near a bundle. “I think there is one there.” 

Cooper adjusts his direction with a gentle turn of the wheel. His eyebrows furrow as he aims towards the Mama cow; surprised when she doesn’t move as they come close. Lucy’s stomach clenching as dread washes through her. The cow stood squared up to them, her eyes looking down at the ground where the calf lay, something was wrong. 

“Com’on sweety,” Cooper says to the heifer, as he carefully gets out of the ATV, “Let us take a look -”

Lucy gasps, as she looks at what should be a calf. Instead of an alive calf, there is what looks to be a mummified body on the ground. The cow was standing there looking at both of them, tail flicking but not moving. Lucy puts the flag down, walking to squat down on the other side of the poor thing. The body was a dark ochre color, the entire thing looking like it had been vacuum sealed in plastic. No eyes, or ears, just hollowness, legs tucked in head tucked down. If it had not been so shrunk it would almost look like it was alive.

“Oh dang,” Cooper sighs, bending down to look at the mummy. “I am sorry girl,” Cooper raises his hand, Lucy watching carefully as the cow comes over and bumps his hand. His forehead furrowed as he rubbed her nose gently, looking back at what should have been a alive calf. 

“Lucy write down her tag number, we will get Woody out to check’er. Once we’re done we’ll mov’er up to the barn. Make sure there is nothin’ left in ‘er.” Cooper says quietly rubbing the cow's nose and face, the cow leaning into the comforting hands of its owner. “You did good Mama, sometimes it happens.”

Lucy did as she was told, grabbing the notebook to write down the cow's ID number. As she watches Cooper comfort the animal. Most cows were protective of their offspring, but this one seemed to understand what was going on. Or maybe it just knew Cooper was trying to help, the thing leaning its head into his chest. 

“We’ll move it, into the back of the ATV. Can’t leave it out’er, don’t need to draw any more predators.” Cooper said quietly, moving away from the heifer slowly.  

The two of them work as quickly as possible to move the poor creature. Mama snorted and stomped a few times, Cooper letting her smell it before they put it into the box of the ATV. Lucy watches the cow for a moment as they drove away. The bovine's long bellows made her heartache, if cows could cry it would have. 

“Do you think they understand?” Lucy asks, wiping her tears away. Grandpa Tim had always said the cows knew more than they’d ever know. She hadn’t been sure at the time, preferring to deal with more facts than fiction, but watching the cow made her wonder. 

Cooper shrugged, hazel eyes shining as he dug in his pockets for a smoke. Lucy grabs the lighter from the cup holder, handing it to him. Wondering if she should ask for one herself, deciding against it at the last second. 

“Think they understand as much as any animal.” Cooper breathes out a puff of smoke. “I like to let’em see the body, make sure they smell it,  keep’em calmer. At least with my herd, unless we’re tryin’ to graft. Then gettin’ the grafter there ASAP takes priority.”

Lucy nods, a sadness pitting in her stomach as they drive over to the next calf. Thankfully on their feet and running as they drove close, Mama whale-eyeing them as they approached. 

***

Lucy stayed and helped Cooper move the cow over to the main barn. The barn wasn’t anything fancy, with a few stalls for anyone sick and, a cow shoot to help make handling anyone easier. Cows spent the majority of their life in the field, or forests. They got health checks, hooves checked, moved, and sorted into different fields. It kept them happy and healthy. Nothing was perfect but this was the way it had been done for many many years. A practiced ritual, at the end of the day, the cows always came first. 

Woody was surprisingly close to their area when Cooper called. The big man drove a white cargo van covered with hand-painted animals on all sides. The vehicle was fully loaded with anything he might need. He was one of the few large animal vets in the area, and getting him over quickly was a rare surprise. 

The man had a riot of dark brown curly hair, a big smile, and a shaggy beard. He was almost always in some kinda overalls. At the moment they were purple with embroidered cows. He was looking at the calf, blue gloves moving it this way and that. Woody frowned, glasses perched on the end of his nose. The body was stiff, more like a rock than a body, it was also surprisingly light. How the cow had birthed it without difficulty was shocking. 

“Well, it’s not common. But not the first one I’ve seen.” Woody sighs, removing his gloves and washing his hands in the sink by the side door. “The cow in the shoot is the one that gave birth?”

“Yah, pretty sure. She was standing over them,” Cooper swallows, and walks Woody over to the bovine, she had been put into the shoot for easier examination. The cow acted as if nothing was wrong munching on some hay. “We checked eighty percent of the herd this mornin’, rest are deeper in the bush. But no one else looked distressed.”

Woody looks her over, checking her body condition before sliding on some shoulder-length gloves. “Alright now Mama, be gentle on me. Just got make sure there is nothin’ left in’re okay.” Woody reached into the cow, Lucy standing near the head of the cow to make sure she was comfortable. Hands running against the creature's big head, scratching behind her ears as Woody 

“Well, everythin’ feels fine. I am going to take some tissue samples, do bloods too. Make sure there is no infection or anythin’ else that might of cause this. She had twins last year right?” 

Woody asked, as he degloves and went over to his vet kit. The man had always had a knack for remembering the ID tags of a herd.

“I’d have to check the record book, but I believe you’re right, yes. Two heifers, both healthy. “ 

Cooper replies, as Woody draws blood and takes what he needs. 

“I will give her a few shots, keep her separate until the tests come back.” Woody said, “Just to be on the safe side. Once we know she’s safe we can put her back into breeding rotation.”

Cooper nodded, “Well thank you for comin' out so quickly Woody, I know you're a busy man.”

Woody smiled, “Not a problem, Coop, if anything else pops up let me know.”

***

The drive into town was mostly peaceful, Lucy trying to avoid the thought of going home. The place felt less and less like home, maybe it was the lack of Grandpa Tim or constant nightmares. Gripping the steering wheel she turns down the main street of town; willing those thoughts away as she heads to the piece-together building that was the hardware store. She had already dropped off the paperwork at the new accountant, the woman seemed excited about the piles of neatly organized boxes. Lucy couldn’t have been more grateful to hand it to someone else. If the rest of the plan fell into place Lucy would have the holes repaired and a fresh coat of paint put on by the end of the week. 

Three sheets of drywall are strapped into the back of the truck, along with a few pieces of lumber. Screws, putty, paint, along with a texturing brush, and various other bits and bobs go into the back seat. Lucy felt somewhat confident she could handle the task at hand. Her hands itched to call Cooper, double-check that she had all the things she needed. Her mind ran back over this morning, the way Cooper’s face had fallen seeing the dead calf. Cattle ranching was hard on the best days, livestock meant deadstock, but that didn’t mean it hurt any less. No, she’d let him be like he didn’t have enough on his plate. 

“Hey, Lucy!” Lucy turns out of her daydreams, to see a tall lanking person with a buzzed head walking towards her. 

Lucy squints, realizing it was her friend Dane from high school. “Holy smoke, Dane! Is that really you!”

Lucy trots over to her friend giving them a big hug. They squeezed her back before letting go to look Lucy over. 

“Jeez, Lucy. You look the same as when you graduated!” Dane smiles, leaning against the side of Lucy’s truck. “I haven’t seen you in forever. I heard about Tim, really sorry ‘bout that.”

Looking away Lucy composed herself, still strange to hear people give condolences. “Yeah, cancer came in fast and hard. Just happy it’s over you know. Don’t think I look quite the same, but thank you, look at you all grown up.”

Dane rubs the back of their buzzed head, a blush staining their cheeks. “You’re too kind Lucy. Still adjusting to everything. Dad has been good, Mom- still getting used to it, but I am happy.”

Lucy grinned, “Good, don’t let anyone hold you back. You stayin’ in town now? 

“Oh, uh-no, just making some extra money before I start working as a heavy-duty mechanic in the fall.” They said beaming with pride. 

“No dang way! That’s great to hear.” Lucy smiles back, happy to hear her friend was doing well, 

“We should go for coffee sometime, or maybe get some food. Be good to catch up.”

“Yes, definitely.” Dane nods eagerly, “I actually if you got any tractors you need to be worked on. I'd be happy to take a look at them.”

“Really?” Lucy said, remembering that she had been neglecting to phone the tractor dealership.“I actually got two, think late eighties, haven’t been used in probably three or four years.”

“Oh, I would love that! Always loved old equipment. Why don’t I come by this Saturday? Hazard a guess you are staying at your Grandpa’s place.” Dane replies a sparkle in their eye at the idea of getting to work on the farm equipment. 

“Yep, I am there! Got the same number too. Give me a ring before you stop by.” Lucy said, more than happy to have an old friend drop by. It would be good to have company, plus she could get her tractors up and running. 

“I will see you then, Lucy,” Dane said as they walked away, Lucy hopping into her truck before taking off herself. Happy to know a friend would be dropping by that weekend. 

***

Lucy sits on the edge of the kitchen counter looking at the drywall she’d managed to get in. It wasn’t the greatest job but with a little mud and paint it would look good as new. Well, Lucy hoped it would. She took a pull of her beer, desperately wishing she had picked out some crappy Chinese food before coming home. 

Her hands taps at the counter, her arms were too sore to keep going right now. Tomorrow she’d hopefully get the mudding done, her hand dug into her pocket and pulling out her phone. 

Opening it up, she clicks on the messaging icon opening up a text thread with Cooper.  Just as quickly closing it, placing the phone on the counter. 

“No, we are not gonna bother the man,” Lucy hums, slipping off the counter and going into the laundry room and opening up the big chest freezer. Rifling around she found some ground beef and frozen mixed vegetables, it would pass as dinner. 

Sitting on the couch she flicked on the TV, scrolling through the different apps to find something to watch. Somehow there never seemed to be anything of interest, instead, she flicked over to some Lost, a guilty pleasure. Did the ending satisfy? No, not at all. Lucy preferred to imagine something different. Maybe something happier, or less flippant. 

Her phone buzzed beside her plate of food, Cooper Howard, popped up across her screen. She put her fork down and flipped it open, swallowing as she hit the message icon, a small grin pulling at her lips. 

Cooper: Hey, thought you should know the Mama from this morning is doing good :) 

Lucy smiles, was she smiling more since meeting Cooper? Shaking her head, she was happy to know the cow was doing okay. Having a stillborn mummified calf could mean that something was seriously wrong inside. Or it could mean nothing at all, that was the tricky part about livestock. 

Lucy: Hey, thanks for keeping me posted, hope she continues to do well. 

Cooper: Did you end up getting the drywall?

Lucy waits for a moment before replying: Yeah, got most of the holes filled in

She winces at the framing of the words but tries not to overthink it. Wasn't like there were many other ways to describe what she was doing. 

Copper: Want to do a calf check in the morning? I will come help with the mudding. 

Lucy smiles, she was not going to turn down the offer of having Cooper over: Deal. What time tomorrow?

Cooper: 6 am, I can pick you up

Lucy felt her cheeks redden at the message, she typed out: Why don’t you come over tonight- Then promptly deleted it, her hand coming up to cover her face. What was she thinking? No that would not do, like the man needs more on his plate.

Instead, she wrote: Sounds good, I will see you then.

Turning back to her food, Lucy tried not to let her mind run too much. Cooper was sweet, kind, caring, and goddamn gorgeous. She worried at her lip, remembering the way the cow had booped Cooper’s hand. How he’d comfort her, the man was something else. 

She rubs at her face, having missed most of the episode she was on. Sleep was on the menu, it was already well past ten, and five am would be coming like a freight train. 

Looking over at her room Lucy feels a shiver run up her spine. Shaking her head, Lucy went over grabbing a blanket, pillow, and her charging cable. Keeping the kitchen light on, she left Lost playing as she curls up under the blanket. She’d work on sleeping in her room later. 

***

The alarm went off loud enough that Lucy fell off the couch, confused as to where the hell she was. Blinking a few times, remembering that she had crashed on the couch. Groaning, she grabbed her phone, turning off the alarm, wanting nothing more than to curl back up under the blanket. Instead, Lucy pushed herself up onto her feet. The coffee pot switched on, she made her way to the bedroom. Stopping at the entryway, her body refused to go any further, the hair on the back of her neck standing on end. 

Lucy pushes her hand in and turns on the light, eyes blinking at the bright space. No shadows moved, nothing peered out from behind the closet door. Yet she still couldn’t move. Turning her head she looks out the door, her mouth falling open in a silent scream. 

Outside the door, across the deck, in the shadow of the forest were two glowing orange eyes. Standing roughly seven feet off the ground, the eyes stare back at her unblinking. Lucy was scrambling backward trying to get away as she trips and falls over the laundry basket crashing onto the floor with a loud bang. Her screaming rang in her ears as she lay splayed out on the floor. Lucy’s chest heaving, her eyes squeezed closed as she tries to will the image away. Shaking on the floor, Lucy pushes the laundry basket away to look at the patio door. Whatever had been there was gone, no eyes, no creature, nothing. 

“What is going on?” Lucy shutters, staring out the door for another minute. “Okey dokey,” She let out a few breaths focusing on lowering her heart rate. “Time to get dressed, Lucy.”

Dressed in leggings and a big shirt, she finds her overalls and slips them on with a big sweater. Filling her biggest to-go coffee cup, she takes several sips of coffee finally feeling somewhat more alive. Trying to convince herself that the orange floating eyeballs from this morning were sleep delusions. Or something other than a creature staring into her house from the forest. 

A knock on her door cleared her mind, she threw a few bits and pieces into a bag. Snagging her coffee and keys she opens the door to see Cooper standing there. He has a tan leather jacket on, a white cowboy hat, and perfectly fitted jeans. His face breaks into a crooked grin when he sees Lucy in the doorway. Her face goes flush as he looks her over the same way she just had. 

“Good mornin’ Miss MacLean.” Cooper drawls, his tongue darting out over his lips, making Lucy feel warm all over. She could get used to him looking at her like that. 

Lucy swallows, “Morning, Mr.Howard. Ready to be on our way.” Happy that her voice didn’t break as she moved through the doorway, locking it behind her.

Cooper held out his arm, Lucy doing her best not to trip over her own feet, as she took his arm. The two walking down to his truck, it was still running and warm inside against the cool spring air. He opened the door for her, and she hopped in. 

***

The calf check was thankfully uneventful, Cooper driving the two of you back to his family farm. His mom, Dorthoy, asked Cooper to bring her over for breakfast. The home was country chic in every way, two-story, white, with a large vaulted front window facing west. 

A deck wrapped from the front door around the back, and the yard was filled with Dorothy's plants. Still dormant now, but come spring the whole place would be filled with flowers. Coop pulls up beside the other vehicles on the dirt road, just outside the separate garage. 

Janey came running outside, in pjs and gumboots, shouting excitedly for her Dad. Lucy smiles as Cooper scoops up his daughter and swings her around in his arms. 

“Eeee” The little girl giggled, Mathias poking his head out the door and watching the two. 

“Hey Mathias,” Lucy smiled at the older boy, he frowned but walked out, socked feet not going further than the front mat.

“Hey buddy,” Cooper smiled, ruffling his brown hair. His frown deepened as Lucy came into the front door.

Lucy toed off her boots, thankful her overalls were mostly clean. She placed her bag by the door before following Cooper deeper into the house. The smell of bacon and coffee made her stomach growl. 

“Are you having breakfast here?” Mathias questioned, standing in the dining room. Hands on his hips, looking at Lucy with narrowed eyes she moved into the kitchen. 

“Mathias, don’t be rude,” Came the chipper voice of Dorothy, she was a stocky woman, with perfectly pined grey hair. Her face marked by the sun with crow's feet and smile lines, she could have easily played Mrs. Clause. 

“Good morning, Mrs. Howard,” Lucy beams, as she helps grab cups and plates for the table. Setting them out as Janey grabbed forks and knives for each seat. 

“Lucy, please call me Dot,” Dorothy smiled, filling each cup with coffee. “We’re all family here,”

Lucy and Cooper finished setting the table, bacon, eggs, and toast piled onto dishes in the center of the table. Richard Howard came in slowly, leaning heavily on his cane. The man had once stood at the same height as his son, now was stooped over with pain as he came to sit at the head of the table. Lucy felt her heart clench, an all too familiar sight before her. A flashback of Tim, the man who had once ducked through doorways stooped over as he shuffled from his bed to the bathroom. She swallows but does her best not to stare, helping Janey get seated instead. 

“Good to see you, Lucy,” Richard said with a small smile, wincing as he shifted in his chair. “Thank you, for helping Cooper.”

“Not a problem, Mr. Howard.” Lucy says as she helps Mathias scoop food onto his plate. He was still glaring at her, but she let it go. Kids would be kids. It wasn’t like she didn’t understand what it was like to lose a parent. 

***

Lucy waves at the kids as they load onto the bus, Mathias waves back with a small smile. Janey had clung onto her Dad, practically having to be peeled off the man to get her onto the bus. They both climbed back into the truck as the bus left. 

“Sorry about Matt,” Cooper added as they drove to Lucy’s place. “He has had a rough go, gets uncomfortable with new folks.”

Lucy shrugged, “It’s okay, little guy has been through a lot. I was similar at his age.”

Cooper nods as they turn down Lucy’s driveway, “I try to do my best with him, but he knows his Granddad is dying.” He swallows as he parks the truck, “Little guy can only handle so much.”

Lucy reaches over squeezing Cooper's arms, “You’re a good Dad, Cooper Howard.”

Cooper swallows looking out the windshield, his knuckles going white as he grips the steering wheel. "I feel like I am drowning most days. Hated having to move them so far." He rubs his jaw, "But we couldn't stay either."

Lucy keeps her hand on his arm, listening to him patiently. His shoulders were drawn tight like he was carrying the weight of the world.

"I am sorry," He murmurs, "We should - ah - go in."

"What if we help each other?" Lucy says, her mouth running before her brain can catch up. "I know, you have so much going on. With the farm, being a Dad, your own Dad. Plus you throw me into the mix with all my wack-a-do problems. Doesn't make it easy." She stops, trying to find out where this train of thought is heading. "But, umm, maybe between the two of us, we could make things work. Two heads is always better than one, and we work well together."

Cooper watching her with an unreadable expression on his face. Lucy felt her stomach twist, wondering if she may have gone too far.

"If that's something you might like to do?" Lucy looks away, moving her hand away to get out of the car before more words spill out of her mouth.

"Lucy," Cooper says, his voice so soft it's almost a whisper. "I would like that. Be nice to have someone who gets it."

SIX

*~*~*~*~*~*~*

Tag list: @toogaytofunctiondangit

**As always likes, comments, shares are soooo appreciated, you can find me Ao3 as well

** Want to be on the tag list let me know

** Most of my fics will be updated once a weekish possibly more often depending on how much writing I can get done! Want to keep the quality and make sure I am putting out my best work.

[harrywavycurly]

What if Harry and SC girlie run into Erin while out? Would Harry have to hold her back from telling Erin off for being rude to Harry and giving him the wrong number?😬

Hiii lovey!! I will give you a little tiny look at how I think this interaction would go, now if y’all feel differently let me know😂💖

-find all things Southern Comfort here✨

A/N: This is a little bit in the future and I think you handle yourself very well, also being called a heifer in the south can be used instead of saying the word b***h (or at least it does where I’m from lol) just so y’all know✨

“Harry?” The voice coming from behind him makes him pause for a moment as he reaches for an apple, making a mental note to cross it off the list whenever he manages to find wherever it is you’ve run off to in the store. He turns his head and feels his eyebrows raise in surprise as Erin stands a few feet away from him with a few items in her hands.

“Erin.” He gives her a smile as he places the apple in the cart that you already had placed a few things in for the beach trip the two of you were taking this afternoon. “How’ve you been?” He asks once he notices she’s still standing there looking at him as if she never expected to run into him again after their meeting almost a year ago even though they both live in the same city.

“I’ve uh been good.” Harry watches as she seems to snap out of whatever state of shock she was momentarily in as she manages to give him a warm smile while taking a few steps closer to him. He just nods and turns to look at the selection of peaches and when he finds one he thinks you’ll deem acceptable he grabs it and places it next to the apple in the cart.

“You never called me.” That sentence makes Harry nearly drop the orange in his hand, her voice is low and it’s not exactly a whisper but she’s not speaking in a volume that would allow others on the same aisle to hear what she said and he can understand why. When he turns to fully face her he sees her cheeks are a little pink and her eyes quickly go from looking at him down to her feet, clearly embarrassed and Harry doesn’t know how to react.

“You didn’t give me your number.” His tone is full of confusion because how was he supposed to call her when she didn’t give him her actual number. She raises an eyebrow at him as she looks up from her feet so she can meet his stare.

“Yes I did I typed it into your phone.” Harry thinks he’s being pranked, there’s absolutely no way she didn’t notice she typed in the wrong number. She had only had one drink when she was with him so it’s not as if she was too drunk to realize what she was typing.

“No you-”

“Honey can I borrow your height? They moved the sugar up two shelves.” Your sweet voice brings a smile to Harry’s face as he feels your hand on his lower back as you appear beside him near the back of the cart. “Oh I’m sorry am I interrupting something?” You ask when you look from Harry to the girl standing a few steps away from him who has a strange look on her face. Harry clears his throat before he looks down at you and motions towards the girl you’re now offering a reassuring smile to because you think she might be a shy fan of his that doesn’t know how to approach him.

“Well sweetheart this is Erin.” Harry feels your hand drop from his back and he just knows this isn’t going to end well if he lets it get too far. You quickly turn your body so you’re standing in front of him with your arms crossed over your chest as if you’re his protector and while Harry normally finds it adorable when you get like this, causing a scene in a grocery store isn’t something he wants to deal with today.

“So you’re the heifer that gave my sugar plum a fake number that ended up being mine?” Your tone is far from pleasant and if Harry wasn’t so worried about what was going to happen next he would’ve actually enjoyed the way your accent got just a tad bit thicker due to you being a little angry.

“Excuse me? What did you just call-”

“She didn’t mean it like that she’s from Texas.” You turn your head upward so you can send Harry a death glare as he tries to explain your choice of words to Erin whose eyes are the size of golf balls and her mouth is slightly hung open in shock.

“Now don’t go trying to tell her what I mean Harry Styles I said exactly what I mean and I’ll say it again if she needs me to repeat it.” Harry puts his hands on top of your shoulders and gives them a little squeeze in a sad attempt to help you calm down just a bit because the last thing he wants is to have you upset with him.

“I accidentally gave you her number?” Erin asks as you’re still glaring at Harry who just nods his head at her question. “And what? Now the two of you are-”

“I don’t think it’s any of your business what we are.” You cut her off as your glare moves from Harry to her making her just roll her eyes as she looks at Harry who shocks her by looking like he’s trying his best to fight a smile as he’s looking down at you and giving your shoulders another squeeze.

“You’re going to let her talk to me like this?” Harry looks at Erin who looks thoroughly embarrassed and he lets out a sigh as you roll your eyes.

“I don’t control her Erin she’s my girlfriend not my possession.” You smile as the word girlfriend slips past his lips making Erin’s face drop. “But uh I guess I should thank you for giving me the wrong number because if you hadn’t done that then I wouldn’t have met-”

“Yeah whatever you’re so welcome.” With that Erin walks down the aisle leaving the two of you standing there.

“She seems fun.” You tease as you uncross your arms and turn around so you’re facing Harry whose hands drop from your shoulders to your hips. “You thought I was gonna hit her didn’t you?” You ask as your arms go around his middle and he just laughs as he leans down to place a quick kiss to the top of your head.

“Only for a moment.” He answers as he looks down at you with a playful grin on his face.

“I can’t believe you tried to thank her for us meeting.” Harry quirks a brow at you making you just roll your eyes. “If anyone was going to hit someone it was going to be her decking you in the face and honestly honey I might’ve let her.” Harry lets out a huff as he slightly bends down as you reach up on your tiptoes so you can place a kiss to his cheek.

“I was trying to be polite.” He defends as you unwrap your arms from around him making him drop his hands from your hips.

“Always such a gentleman.”

[unamused-boss]

Take out Night

Billy Hargrove x Fem oc Hello! Just before we begin this is a fic that will introduce another Oc that I have created. A Billy x Oc to be more precise. I have seen so many other creators, some whom I am mutuals with, make amazing oc. And I wanted to jump on the train with it. Plus I really want Billy to have a weird gf! So I have made a character for Billy hargrove and I hope you like her.

It was all strange when the two first got together. If you mean the Cali boy going after probably the weirdest hot girl in town then you'd be correct. Because that is what happened when Billy Hargrove asked out, and is still going out with, Phoebe Brown.

Yep, Hawkin's local weirdo. Has been seen walking bare foot within the woods. Constantly seeming like she has consumed an intense amount of drugs even though she doesn't even drink or smoke. Claiming it ruins the soul of the body. Her dark brown hair always done up in a new style. Along with her clothes matching her presence, comfortable.

It was a month long gossip train as to why Billy would ask out such a peculiar girl. Many of Billy's, so called, friends said it was because he lost a bet or was looking for something easy. But what the masses do not know it took Billy a whole month before Phoebe even said yes to a date. Billy claimed he has never liked Hawkin's heifers, as much as Phoebe has told him to stop calling them that, he wanted something he thought would bring him excitement. So when he laid eyes on Phoebe Brown, he knew it was her.

Well to get that out of the way with all the sentimental shit that we will get into later. Lets focus on where our couple is at presently. It is the middle of December for Hawkins with a blissful, not to Billy, cold outside. And in front of a little chinese food restaurant sat a charged blue camaro where our couple sits. It is just another of their many at home date nights tonight. Let's see where the night will take them.

“Do you have to do this every time?” Billy asked his girlfriend. Who at the moment has her nose deep within a menu of said Chinese restaurant. 

“Yes, what if I wanna try something new?” Phoebe said back to him, still with her face in the pamphlet of the menu. 

“Babe there is no doubt in my mind that you have not eaten the whole menu since we have discovered this restaurant.” Billy reasoned with her. “Can we please order the food so we can go back to your house”

Phoebe faced him with a smile gracing her face. “You know, for such a big strong guy, you can be very soft and cute.” The statement flusters Billy, she knows this. But he will always keep his tough guy act up till they get home. So in response to his girlfriend's statement, he turned his head away from her. Which did not help because she could see his ears turning red which meant he was blushing. Phoebe just giggled at him, “Get out of the damn car.” Was all he said to her, but not with any mean intent behind it. So that is what you did. You both got out of the car to make your way in to order your dinner for the night.

“Hey Billy, Hey Phoebe” The cashier greeted, “What can I get ya?”

“We’ll get the spicy chicken combo and spring rolls to go with it.” Billy answered to the cashier. 

“We will also take the Lo mien and crab rangoons.” Phoebe added on with confidence.

“Um, who paid?” Billy sassed to her.

“Um, who’s job is it to pay?” She simply sassed back. “I also paid for your gas, be a good boyfriend and pay for your girlfriend's dinner.” Billy just rolled his eyes to her.

“Alright coming right up.” That was all that needed to be said for the two to take their seats in front of the window to wait on their food.

“Hey, can I ask you a question?” Phoebe asked.

“Okay, hit me.” Billy said thinking it was gonna be a challenge.

“Why did you ask me out?” She asked simply.

Billy was silent for a minute. “This isn’t a trap is it? Last time this happened my tire got slashed.” Billy panicked.

“No it’s not… I just- I just think there is someone more suited for you than me.” Phoebe admitted.

“What like some cow on the cheer team?” Billy said very aggressively.

“Billy- I’m serious.”

“The reason I asked you out was because you were different from every other girl I have ever dated.” Billy told her, looking into her honey colored eyes.

“But-”

“I don’t wanna hear it.” He stopped her. “You are the best thing that has ever happened to me, and if I had to go another month of chasing you around to simply look in my direction then I will. I know I’m not the best guy, but you have made me realize that I will do whatever it takes for us to stay together.” Billy’s eyes softened as he looked at her. Phoebe's once tired looking eyes became wide while staring at Billy as he spoke. No guy has ever said something like that to her. Yeah, she knows she’s weirded Billy out before but he still stayed with her.

“Billy” She spoke softly, a smile making its way onto her face. He smiled back at her, taking her hand into his on the table. 

“Order 37!” Was shouted out, to which brought the couple out of their trance.

Once the food was picked up. The couple made their way to the camaro to go home. The drive was silent, it was warm and comfortable. Just the quiet tone of one of Billy’s rock tapes playing from the window. As Phoebe was looking out the window to the dark outside of the night. She saw the glimmer of snow, she gasped as her eyes lit up. Even though it had snowed for the past few weeks, with every new snowfall Phoebe got excited. She loved the cold weather unlike her boyfriend. Billy heard her small gasp from beside him; he made a small glance over to her to see she was staring out the window. He just smiled at her expression, he couldn’t have asked for anyone better. The couple usually didn’t express too much emotion in front of others, not too heavy on pda other than a quickie in the janitor's closet. But the nights such as these were Billy could get away from his house to go home with her. To spend the night cuddling and watching trash movies they can make fun of. It was pure bliss for Billy, He loved it  He loved her.

The car came to a stop in Phoebe’s driveway. With her parents out of the house for the next few days that meant more time with Billy, and being able to eat in the living room. The food was set out on the coffee table, blankets were prepped, movies prepped to be watched, and Billy’s side ready for Phoebe to cuddle into. The chosen pick from the Family Video  tonight were American Ninja, obviously Billy, and Smooth Talk, clearly picked out by Phoebe, the two had very distinct tastes. The two watched and ate with glee for being in the other mere presence. In the middle of one of the movies Billy pauses it out of nowhere.

“Heey?” Phoebe said in confusion to his action.

Billy turned to her, now her side is cold. “Why did you ask me that question at the restaurant tonight?” Billy was curious. He wanted to make sure no one said anything to her and so she wasn’t in her head.

“I just- I just started thinking about the types of girls you went after before you got with me.” She said, “And I felt like I was a downgrade.” Hearing this broke his heart. “ I’m noy like Tammy, Tina, or Nancy… It's stupid but I can’t help but feel insecure sometimes. You were told about me from people that judged me and still chose me after everything. I just don’t get it sometimes.”

“Like I said before, you are unlike any girl I have ever been with, and I love it. I love you.” Billy said.

“You said the L word.” Phoebe giggled at him. Billy’s smile broke out after you said that.

“What are you gonna punish me?” He teased. In response Phoebe places her soft lips onto Hargroves. It felt like a puzzle being completed when they kissed. Phoebe became more forward and started to slowly push Billy back until he was on his back while she was sitting on him still kissing on her couch. The kiss slowed and the two started to pull away. Looking at one another for a moment. Until a sly smirk appeared on Billy’s face.

“I should say the L word more often if that’s my punishment.” He flirted. Phoebe just laughed at him then pulled him up right to continue where they left off. In the movie obviously. Billy played the movie and Phoebe snuggled back into his side.

“Just so you know.” Phoebe started. “I love you too.” Billy smiled and kissed the top of her head. The night was perfect, as always.

Hope you enjoyed! Like always if you have feed back I would love to hear it.

if you wanna see anything specifically with Billy and Phoebe just request or comment.

Thank you, love ya bookies!

[sweet-sammy-kisses]

Eddie’s mind once he learns about Natalia no longer being in Buck’s life: Buck is single? BUCK IS SINGLE!!! But I'm not 😞. I have a girlfriend who is chaperone, my son’s first date, who I asked because I thought Buck might be busy with his girlfriend, and there is no girlfriend. And Buck wanted to do something with me this weekend, but I had to say no because of Christopher's first date that I should have told Buck about so he could have chaperone with me instead I have my girlfriend, who I should be happy about, chaperone it with me but that was before I knew Buck my Buck was single. I need to know what to do before another heifer comes sniffing around Buck and trying to sink her claws into him. Oh God, what if Taylor comes back and Buck, who is lonely, starts seeing her again because I have a girlfriend and I can't spend as much time with him. Why do I have to have a girlfriend when Buck is single? I need to make sure that Buck doesn't date anyone he has horrible taste in women who he falls for when he is lonely. Just look at Abby, Taylor, and Natalia. Nope, Buck needs to stay single, and once I am single again, we can hang out more, and everything will be as it should be.

[spookykestrel]

Lets Talk Farm Terminology!

Yay! I'm here to answer all the simple farm animal questions and misconceptions you've been too afraid to ask! Why? Because im bored and have thoughts and am reading Watership Down and want people to know the difference between "bunny," "rabbit," and "hare."

Leporidae

You're probably thinking wow kes how bold of you to start out not only with an animal uncommonly kept by farmers but also starting with a scientific name few will know! And you're right, but I don't care! The Leporidae family includes rabbits and hares, and yes! they are different. Very closely related as they belong to the same family, but rabbits and hares are not the same thing. Simply: hares are bigger and wilder than rabbits. There are no domestic species of hare and they are more adapted to solitary life than living in groups/colonies. Looking at the image above you can note slight differences in facial structure and build, as well as most notably the ear length, with the smaller rabbit on the left and the larger hare on the right. Most Watership Down art features hares but I don't mind it all that much as the hare anatomy is more fun lol.

Now, what's a bunny? Bunny is an informal term used to refer to rabbits, especially young ones. It wouldn't be incorrect to refer to the long eared friend in your yard as a bunny but if you were writing a paper or just want to sound more serious, it would be better to say rabbit (as you notice, I am refraining from calling them bunnies in this post).

When referring to rabbits, their terminology is similar to other familiar animals. A male rabbit is called a buck and a female rabbit is called a doe, like deer or goats. However, a baby rabbit is called a kit or kitten and a group of siblings is called a litter, just like cats.

Goats

Aw no more latin? As the domestic breeds of goat all come from the same species, there's no need for a broad scientific name as we all have an idea of what to picture, unless you're thinking of a mountain goat which are not considered true goats and are considered a goat-antelopes, making them closer in relation to muskoxen! Which is a whole different topic! Regardless, there's lots of different breeds of domestic goats (Capra hircus), like dogs and cats. Some are better suited for dairy production, some for meat, others are bred for their cashmere! Pictured above is a Saanen goat, one of, if not the most popular dairy goat breeds (in the US at least), known for their high milk production.

Many goat breeds have horns, which vary from antlers bc of how they grow and their composition. Horns can be removed when the goats are young, in a process called dehorning or disbudding. When horns are removed, their growth is stunted and they will not grow back once the animal is older. However, disbudding is a controversial topic as it is not painless and often unnecessary. Both male and female goats can have horns, although their appearance may differ.

I mentioned above that (mature, uncastrated) male goats are called bucks and females are called does. Many, many people use the terms billy and nanny to refer to goats. However, the better term would be buck/doe, and when people use billy/nanny it does peeve me. You may also hear the word wether to refer to castrated goats. Baby goats are called kids.

Cattle

My favorites of the post, let's finish with cattle (Bos taurus)! Same as goats, cattle can be bred and used for many purposes like the lovely Brahman I've included above, a very recognizable meat breed. Cattle terminology can get a little tricky as its not as straightforward as some other animals.

Cattle is the correct term for these animals, as cow technically refers to a mature female (has been bred). No one's going to freak out if you say cows instead of cattle, myself included, especially because if you dont know the specific details of the animal its hard to know whether to say cow or heifer or bull or steer.

So, a cow is a mature female, and a mature male is called a bull. An immature, young female is called a heifer. A castrated male is called a steer. When referring to an immature male you can use bull or bull calf.

Many places you will see the term "ox" thrown around (not to be confused with a MUSKox mentioned previously) and there's a lot of misconceptions surrounding the name. An ox is a specially trained bovine. That's all it is. There's lots of regulations on how they are trained and all that, but that's the basics of it. It is most common and recommended to use castrated males (steers) because castration should temper their aggression and testosterone production; additionally, males are typically larger than the females. However! Female cows can be trained as oxen, as can bulls.

Technically an ox should not be referred to as such until they have completed their training, which can take years. Typically oxen are selected at a young age and routinely worked to develop good skills. They are used for tasks plowing or pulling carts, and as modern technology has improved, use of oxen has declined.

Thaaaat's all I have to say about that today, I sort of led into each topic in little ways and I've nothing more to mention. Hopefully you learned a little, I think livestock are cool 👍

[smidnite]

I realize I've been very slack about posting what's going on at home, in terms of writing, but here's a recap:

I was enjoying writing a roundrobin with @winterspiderpurrs and @illogicalkat , but was losing steam because my job wears me tf out and I rarely have braincells left.

I've been working on the sides of my house, getting fill dirt and grading the side of the house, covering the exposed foundation. Y'all, that took SO MUCH fill dirt, but at least I got it for free. There's a couple in a house a few blocks from me with a sign that says "FREE FILL DIRT!" Hell yeah, I took advantage. I don't pay for what I can get for free with a little (or a LOT) of work.

While I was taking care of the grading, I was also pulling up an EGREGIOUS amount of roots from some invasive bush/ tree. The roots of which may have been responsible for getting into my clay pipes (this house was built in 1968). My dad came over with his sawzaw and together we cut down the tree. A few weeks later (as my energy allowed) I went digging down as far as could, uprooting as much as I could, before filling back in.

That said, I also, over a period of time, purchased some landscaping bricks for hella cheap, so when I finished doing the grading, I was able to cover with plastic and lay down the bricks. I'm hoping to be able to get some mulch in the new few weeks.

During all that came the sudden IKYFL on my discovery two weeks before her potential due date that one of my cats, Cardamom, was pregnant. Lil' heifer looked like a bowling pin.

She had her babies on September 30th, and the kittens are now a month and a half years old and are incredibly SPEEDY little disasters.

I purchased this house in February using the maximum amount of my retirement fund allowed, because who's going to be retiring in this economy? But what I learned is that in bundling your homeowners insurance and township taxes in with your mortgage, they are ESTIMATING the taxes. My mortgage went up a whole $300 this past millage. Which means that until I get my tax return next year, I'm going to be late on my mortgage.

Someone ran over my mailbox, smashing the crap out of it. That was $100+ that I didn't want to spend but had no choice. Yes, I COULD have taken the receipts to my insurance agent and been reimbursed, but in the long run that would raise my premium. NOPE.

And finally, I haven't been able to cook because this past Wednesday, I turned a breaker off to take out the old dishwasher that came with the house, and that Whirlpool was 20+ years old. I figured I couldn't be that hard, because in theory, it isnt.

I WAS WRONG. The biggest issue was the previous owner putting new flooring on top of the old, and AROUND the installed dishwasher. I couldn't just slide it out, so I had the dubious joy of breaking out the sawzaw again, and cutting my countertop to lift it like a car hood and get the dishwasher out.

The second hurdle was AGE. Because of the age difference in the appliances, the locations of where things are connected is different, and WHAT they're connected with is a bit different. Or, in the case of the wires, they're the same, but the length was too short.

By that evening, I was very defeated and disappointed, knowing that I was going to have to spend money I didn't have. But after sleeping on it, my brain reminded me that I am a SCAVENGER, and I DO NOT pay for things I can get for FREE!

I've been cannibalizing parts from the old dishwasher, and hopefully I'll have everything up and running by the end of the night. I've been up since 5am, and I've done two loads of laundry, cleaned the living room, and cleared off my dresser--I still have moving boxes to sort through.

I KNOW I'll pass out before 10pm, and it's noon now.

TIME TO GET TO WORK.

[memethebum]

Started a new was supposed to be a oneshot for Halloween AU for October!!

This one is a 1800s mutual pining fake marriage AU hehe

————————————————————————-

“Are you alright?” Maka whispered before tightening her grip on his arm.

I dunno, am I? Soul thought as he looked to the side and noticed the way Maka’s eyebrows had been slightly furrowed in worry. However, his attention soon wandered towards how radiant she looked due to Marie’s handiwork in makeup and picking out a perfect dress to borrow for their wedding.

“Ye-yes, why wouldn’t I be?” Soul coughed out while watching Maka flash a smile at the crowd that’d gathered to watch them leave the courthouse.

“I don’t know, I just…thought you were acting a little off,” his wife replied, causing him to let out a long sigh due to how hard he’d been suppressing the urge to imagine all of this being real and not merely a favor between two friends.

“Oh well, I suppose I should try smiling a lil’ more. Wouldn’t wanna displease my wife,” he added before gently placing one of Maka’s hands within his own and feathering a kiss onto her knuckles.

The young man then looked up to see her gaping at him while he wondered if the soft blush across her cheekbones was a figment of his imagination.

“Hm, well I’m glad to hear it,” Maka whispered before grounding her feet to a halt and reaching up to peck him on the cheek, eliciting a set of gasps from the crowd.

The stopping point allowed Soul to get a perfect view of Blake, who seemed to flash him a wink before displaying the newsletter he’d been milking for the past week.

A Leaflet for Love

Soul Evans, one of our town’s most humble and prosperous farmers, had asked for a special section to be printed into Miss Maka Albarn’s copy of the Death Tribune this past week. It read as follows:

I am twenty two years old, have a rather peculiar set of teeth, believe in the wealth of Mister Deathman, and the merit of the crops which our town produces. I have taken up a State lot, cleared up eighteen acres last year, and seeded ten of it down.

My buckwheat looks first-rate, and the oats and potatoes are bully.

I have got nine sheep, a two-year-old bull, and two heifers, besides a house and barn.

I want to get married.

I want to buy bread-and-butter, hoop-skirts, and waterfalls for some person of the female persuasion during life. That's what's the matter with me.

But I don't know how to do it, as my world would shatter if none other than Miss Maka Albarn would give me the pleasure of being my wife.

————————————————————

1 week ago

“I just…don’t understand what I’m supposed to do sometimes, Soul,” Maka exclaimed before taking a swig out of a large wine bottle and passing it over to him.

“C’mon, you’re Maka Albarn, the toughest woman ta’ ever live,” Soul mumbled back while shifting the arm he’d snaked around her back.

He then took a large swig from the bottle while Maka slumped further against the pine tree they were seated under. The summer had graced the town with a cool evening breeze, which allowed the pair to have a perfect atmosphere for their nightly chats.

“Women are women to the lot, especially when it comes to business. Am I just supposed to waltz up to any investor, curtsy, and say good morning my name is Miss Maka Albarn and I’m inquiring about opening the first ever department store in Death City by myself,” she huffed, earning her a chortle from Soul.

“Well that’s where you’re wrong. I’m gonna be there to help you through it silly,” he added before regarding her with a shark-toothed grin, only to watch as her eyes became glazed over in deep thought.

“Hmm, help me out. That’s it!” the young woman yelped, eliciting Soul to jump at her sudden outburst.

“Soul….” she murmured before placing the wine bottle onto the ground and clasping both of her hands onto his own.

“Will you marry me?” Maka added while giving him an ardent stare, only for it to go unnoticed as the young man tried to wrap his mind around what she’d just said.

“Wha-“ Soul attempted to stammer out before feeling Maka’s grip on his hands begin to tighten.

“You could be the investor for me! I mean, you already have all this land and-“ Maka added, although Soul’s mind was too busy replaying those four words she’d uttered a moment ago.

Heh, kinda funny how I think about that stuff all the time. Me marryin’ Maka, her starting a business, us harvesting these fields every year until we’re an old married couple. Too bad…I can never really give her that life Soul mentally lamented before Maka slowly released his hands with a sigh.

“I-I mean only if you want to. It-it’s a request so please don’t-“

“Let’s do it,” the young man voiced while feeling a gentle warmth begin to creep up his chest once Maka’s emerald eyes settled upon his large grin.

“…Really?” she whispered, probing Soul into pressing his forehead against hers.

“Yea, if it means that much to ya’, let’s get hitched,” he added before Maka tackled him to the ground and hastily planted a set of kisses across his face.

[imafatwomannnnnn]

Feeling like a heifer. Idk who else struggles like this but here goes.....

I came back to edblr bc I was gaining a lot and fast. Then I was like all ana and dropped 10 lbs quick. Great. Loved it. Wanted more. Made the proclamations of what I was going to do. Did now of that but binged and started a horrible shame cycle. Also the short 5 week period made me anemic. To were my cheeks would hurt really bad. So now I'm all conflicted. I want to loose wt. But I don't want my health to suffer. So I'm really trying to eat 3 small meals a day to maintain my health. But I am finding I am over eating eating more often then not. This is were realistic fasting helps me. Bc if it's not too long of a fast I don't binge and my eating window is small so I don't eat as much but then I get the health problems. But I am getting health problems from being over wt too. Like sob and god only knows what else I can't see. It's a yo yo of insanity. I don't even know if any of this makes sense. I just miss my ortho but something gets in the way of me wanting to eat healthy and take care of myself. I think I know what it is but I guess time will tell.

[substantial-gains]

[THANK YOU for reblogging my story, and underneath my OWN personal tag at that?! I don't know if I deserve such high esteem but I am absolutely grateful for it!

Speaking of tags, please stop by the barn and update the statistics on Asuka's collar. She blew past another five cup sizes. Thanks in advance!]

I mean, the tag makes looking back on all your boobilicious writing all the easier, so of course your stuff gets the special treatment~~

B-But...how many cakes am I gonna hafta bake with all the milk this heifer is producing...

[deancasbigbang]

Title: Arms Around His Angel

Author: blackhorsedances

Artist: stonelions

Rating: Explicit

Pairings: Castiel/Dean Winchester, minor Benny LaFitte/Garth Fitzgerald IV, Gabriel/Kali. Charlie Bradbury/Meg Masters; Jody Mills/Donna Hanscum. Past Dean and Lee Webb; Past Dean and Lisa Braeden; Past Dean and Benny LaFitte. Sam Winchester/Jess Winchester. Jack is Sam and Jess Winchester’s son.

Length: 36041

Warnings: No major archive warnings Content Warnings: Mention of James and Amelia Novak dying in an MVA (no gore, nothing on screen), mention of the humane slaughter of a steer (no gore, nothing on screen).

Tags: !Inventor Castiel. !Rancher Dean Winchester. Bisexual Castiel Novak. Semi-comfortably Bisexual Dean Winchester. Top Cas/Bottom Dean. Smut and fluff. Mostly safe sex. Hurt/comfort. Happy Ending.

Posting Date: October 14, 2024

Summary: Castiel Novak invented cutting-edge solar technology and left his position as CEO of Angelus, Inc. to protect himself and his technology from his dysfunctional brothers. He found safety on a 20 acre farm in Kansas with a pond, house, barn, and his trailer. When his twin and sister-in-law are killed, he’s drawn back into the business, and into danger, to protect his niece Claire and his technology. Dean Winchester rebuilt Winchester Ranch after John almost destroyed it. He has 500 acres of land, a ranch house, and a big barn. He raises American Wagyu beef. He’s a single Dad with a great son, Ben, a giant moose brother Sam and Sam’s wife Jess, and an adorable nephew Jack who roams around the ranch with his trusty sidekick, Honeybee, Dean’s old palomino mule.  Castiel and Dean meet accidentally at a hotel and share a night of wild–and completely anonymous–intimacy. When Castiel wakes up alone, with no note and no phone number from his ‘Cowboy’, he assumes that the night was a one and done, and regretfully moves on with his life. Dean keeps thinking about the ‘Angel’ that he spent a night with, but is pretty sure that he doesn’t deserve that kind of a guy in his life. Jack and Honeybee discover “Mister Cas” and inadvertently set the stage for ‘Cowboy’ and his ‘Angel’ to meet. But sinister forces are moving in the background. Will they be able to overcome the forces that are trying to keep them apart?

Excerpt: “What’s Jack doing, Sam? Garth says he and Honeybee are out most days from breakfast until well after lunch. Jody says he packs peanut butter and banana sandwiches.” Sam shrugs. “He says he’s out visiting Mister Cas. I think he probably found the fort we built that one summer, and is holed up out there with sandwiches for his imaginary friends. Let it be, Dean. The heifers are out in the north pasture. The steers are in the east pasture. There’s nothing out by the fort to worry about.” “Snakes, Sam. There are snakes to worry about.” Sam looks at Dean across the kitchen island, and shakes his head, hair flopping over into his eyes. “You’re the one that told me that a mule will kill a snake faster than you can say ‘snake’, and I believe you because I’ve seen Honeybee do it. Let him be. Ben will be out of school in a couple of weeks, and he’ll be following Ben around like a puppy.” “Heh, you’re probably right.” Dean runs a hand down the back of his neck.  “I know I am, Dean. You worry about all of us, but you worry too much. You can’t watch over everyone all of the time.”

DCBB 2024 Posting Schedule

[stonerskinny]

no i’m freaking the fuck out i did it again im like a zombie i am so horrible what is wrong with me

took a fucking sleeping pill to knock myself out because jesus fucking christ. it’s like i want to gain back everything i lost. legitimately contemplating ending myself because what the fuck i have no self control

i can’t do this shit anymore i can’t eat or i’ll gain but i can’t starve because im mentally weak and it’s so obvious by how fucking huge i am compared to everyone around me

i need to stay inside for a week and rot and sleep and starve and not be fucking perceived but i have work friday-monday so instead i am going to put on a fake smile and pretend like i don’t know that everyone thinks im a fucking heifer.