#i am also working on my fanfics i swear
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holy shit it's elucien week????????
#was anyone going to tell me#(as if I have ever interacted with anyone else in the fandom)#acotar#elucien#I mean at least I am actively working on tmov lol#very elucien shipper of me if I do say so myself#although at the moment it's less elucien more “elain in a situation. lucien is also there”#but it is coming I promise#we're about to get to my favorite part of any fated mates fanfic:#the (nesting) “you live like this????” scene#I cannot WAIT#both sides will be internally flipping their shit over the other's interior decorating fails#it'll be so so good I swear#we're about to get lucien's “holy shit this is the exact wrong place for you to live. exit the night court NOW good god” moment#it'll be so so fun I promise#fanfiction#elucien week#elucien week 2024
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i have been CURSED with overtime
#i am working on such a cool project for work#like literally the only project of its kind and I GET TO BE IN CHARGE OF IT#ME#but i keep putting all my effort into this project bc it's due soon#and i have no energy left for writing my gay little fanfics UGHHHHHH#i swear the last chapter of mttwoiilt is like... 95% finished#but i CANNOT GET IT TO 100%#also i keep getting distracted making art for it so you guys have to pretend i have more art skill than i really do#lie to me about how good this art is when you see it okay?#anyway all that to say when i finally DO have the time and the energy to write#tell me why it's writing for a DIFFERENT ROOMMATES AU#i'm terrible#i hope you guys really love roommates fics tho bc i fear i'm about to offer a steady supply until i fixate on something else
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i want to hear the sports anime manifesto
Okay short version:
My life was a sports anime for a bit, and watching sports anime makes me nostalgic for those days.
Medium version:
The typical shonen sports anime deals with themes of camaraderie, ambition, and the intersections of camaraderie and ambition, which ALWAYS hits me right in the chest.
I'm not an ambitious person by nature, but--you know that one poem floating around on here, the one about the moth that wants nothing more than to fly into the flame, and how it would be nice to feel that kind of all consuming passion? Yeah, that's the feeling I get from sports anime.
And often, for the Team Sports anime, you'll get characters who have nothing in common except that they Love the Same Thing--a friendship/rivalry/(romance) formed on the basis of a shared interest. That's sweet as hell!
And they're super predictable and low stress for me. Very easy to watch! Total popcorn shows. Also I like listening to people infodump about their passions. Someone loved their Sport so much they wrote a whole-ass story about it, so yeah, eat that shit up.
Long version:
The Socioeconomic Inequalities of High School Sports
In high school, I was on a crappy underfunded soccer team (with a healthy dose of sexism) and due to [sports league division reasons] the schools we played against were almost exclusively private schools.
I cannot describe how existential it is to be wearing a hand-me-down formerly white-turned-disgusting-gray uniform that's at least five years old when playing against a team that gets brand new windbreakers every season.
(If you've read AAB, YES this is where my obsession with the windbreakers comes from.)
(Hilariously, the guys team got windbreakers but we didn't.)
(I am not over the fucking windbreakers.)
But anyway, when you're constantly losing to private schools you get this fucking complex about it.
This should come as no surprise but like. People with the time and resources to practice their Thing get good at their Thing.
Playing pick up soccer at the park is practice. Playing rec league soccer is organized, repeated practice.
Playing competitive club soccer is all of that, plus a coach who knows How To Coach and What The Sport Is, plus you get morale-boosting uniforms and the chance to play with and against other skilled players. So you're exposed to a lot more, and thus, you learn a lot more.
Competitive club soccer is also Expensive. Rich kids get good.
There's a reason why the "Powerhouse School" is a thing in sports anime, because it's a thing in real life. People with leisure time and money get to invest in their sports development, and everyone else gets left behind in the dust. It's basically a microcosm of capitalism.
The underdog sports story is (quite tragically) bootstraps propaganda. All you have to do is be really good and work really hard and have A LOT OF PASSION to get good at your sport! The cream rises to the top! This is a meritocracy! Let's ignore all the other factors that go into an individual's development as an athlete!
(My brother got scouted for club soccer as a kid. He actually went to tryouts and got offered a spot and a scholarship and everything, but there's SO many hidden fees after the initial registration. Uniforms, equipment, travel and accommodation, tournaments, plus like, the time sink, so we never signed him up. And equipment-wise, soccer is one of the cheapest sports you can play--just imagine the price for something like baseball or hockey.)
In sports anime, there is no reform. There is no revolution.
But sports anime isn't really about that. It's about the narratives we create when we convince ourselves that we deserve to win.
(You know what I mean. Every billionaire is convinced they're some sort of heroic underdog. The same exact kind of 'working your way up' narrative.)
Sports anime is like, the uncomplicated power fantasy of playing the game. It's a world where you are rewarded for your hard work, because it's narratively satisfying. It's a world where it's safe to want things, because you have the exact same chances as the private school kids.
I used to be an obnoxiously competitive child. Then I got all my competition beaten out of me by 3 straight years of constant losing in my clownagerie of a high school soccer team (affectionate). I am going to admit that experience made me a better person and I would not trade it for anything, but I also had to like, relearn how to want things. And maybe real life is not as equal opportunity as the world of sports anime, but I think it's good to want things.
Of course, the winner-loser dichotomy makes sense in sports because of the inherent nature of competition, but it doesn't make sense in stuff like society and economics because that's like, competing over the right to live. That's where the capitalism metaphor ends,
Does sports anime actually go into the socioeconomic inequalities of sports? No. Of course not. Giant Killing never got a season 2.
But it is something I think about when I write sports anime fic. Even if it's not the point, it influences my characterization. The ego of a prodigy character in a shitty sports program is different from the ego of a prodigy character in a rich kid sports program. I am obligated to my amateur attempts to capture the complexities of the high school sports environment in my fanfiction because I am fucking insane I had a specific high school sports experience and they do say to write what you know.
#MEG I SWEAR TO YOU I WILL READ TANGERINE AT SOME POINT#I have so many thoughts about sports anime which is tragic because sports anime is not that deep#it is never that deep#part of the reason why I got so sucked into Daiya is because of the powerhouse school setting#and the fact that Eijun was so obviously lost because he never had that kind of organized system before#people give Seidou a lot of shit for 'not helping Eijun' enough but genuinely it's because he has NO CLUE how to reach out#I poured so much brainpower into Eijun's backstory in my brain it's embarrassing as hell#*shaking fanfic authors by the shoulders* YEAH THE CUTTHROAT COMPETION SUCKS BUT YOU DONT FIX IT BY SENDING HIM TO A DIFFERENT SCHOOL#I also am the only person who understands Miyuki Kazuya (exaggeration)#everyone gives him shit for the Nabe thing and look. yes he was wrong.#but I was once in that same exact situation and responded exactly the same way#Daiya no Ace is not about friendship#it's about Ambition#and people tend to make Eijun the sweet sentimental sunshine friendship guy#but he has JUST as much cutthroat ambition as Miyuki#that's why they work. that's why they understand each other#there's a whole essay I could write about Misawa but it's basically just chapter 18 of AAB#anyway if you want to watch a sports anime that does the Healthy Ambition and the Friendship Thing in the most wholesome way possible#watch Haikyuu. it really is the perfect sports anime.#shame the fanfic is 99% ship because the sports aspect of it is SUPER sweet#asks#jumpstrike#I'm answering jumpstrike but Tav I hope you see this too#lazuli talks#sports anime
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wow my mental state is normal huh. anyways (hurls these into the abyss)
#my art#graphite scribbles#Les Mis#Les Misérables#Jean Valjean#Cosette#ft. Skyrim#J’Harla Blackmane#Elora Blackmane#ft. Resident Evil#The Merchant RE4#If you can’t tell it’s been a hell space in my brain lately#also; I AM IN FACT WORKING ON MY FANFIC I SWEAR TO GODS#I PROMISE#rea rambles in the tags#rea's trash
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Sorry I haven’t been posting much this week, I’m currently away for a work trip and then I have to head to another work trip just a few days after I get back from this one so I haven’t had time to draw anything 🥲 but I’ve been working on the next chapter of the fanfiction version of Knightfall in Dream Land while I’ve been away so I’m hoping to post that soon. In the meantime, here’s a nice picture I took of the clouds when I was flying out for this trip ☁���
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#text post#not Kirby stuff#I’m a very nervous flyer but the flight out here went okay aside from being a bit bumpy towards the end#I know turbulence is safe it just feels uncomfortable#anyway yeah if I’m not posting that much right now this is why#I’ve got these two work trips and am also trying to finish my dissertation draft for grad school#I’m still working on my comic and my fanfic I swear lmao just have a lot of grad school and work obligations to deal with right now#feeling a little stressed but I’ll be okay 🥲 grad school is just A Lot right now but I’m hopefully almost done with it#thank you all for being patient I really do love to draw and share all my Kirby stuff I’ve just got a lot going on in my life right now
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At long last: either an alternate explanation for or continuation of my prior comic regarding how Bill was ABSOLUTELY naked in Ford's karaoke night drawing. (Because errors in art do not exist. Artists do not make mistakes. So if you see any in this comic, No You Do Not.)
I am so normal about these old dorks.
I'm not really clear on exactly when Bill started throwing his desperation book at Ford just like a needy ex do, but I find it extremely funny to imagine it happening literally the day of or after the makeshift funeral. Bill just gets this weird sense of 'Ford is taking steps to move on' and CANNOT FUCKING ABIDE.
I hope you enjoy all the goofy things I added to each page of Bill's sad spieling. (Everything SHOULD be readable so long as you view the full size, but I have added basically this whole little fanfic in the image descriptions, LMAO, which lays out all the little written notes and such.) Also don't ask how Bill managed to sneak that vampire pen in there. I have no idea, and honestly? I don't wanna know.
Oh, and a little bonus comic:
Of course Bill would take it as flirting. Because between the two of them, Bill is the bigger masochist By Far. :)
Also I have continued applying The Good Place logic to any of Bill's attempts to swear. Case in point, one last bonus image, this time with a motivational line from my slapdash Theraprism OC, EV-01:
Yes, its name is just 'love' backwards. No, I will not be taking any feedback on this. Yes, EV-01 was only ever assigned to Bill's case due to the Theraprism being desperate to make some progress in rehabilitating him. No, it did not work anywhere close to staff's expectations - Bill didn't even appreciate EV-01's matching fondness for bowties! (He claimed the fondness to be "cultural appropriation" and insisted he'd been traumatized by it.)
Anyway, if you like my stuff, reblogs are very much appreciated, and if you really really like it, perhaps consider my commissions or yeeting a teeny tiny tip my way? I am trying to recoup over 500 dollars in vet bills, ahaha... 🙃
In other news, I loved all the fun tags people added to the prior naked-karaoke comic (such as 'the hat and bow-tie stay ON during sex' and the classic '[insert keysmash here]', as well as the many amused/bewildered remarks about how I either made the bricks a piece of clothing or just straight up peeled Bill's skin off). However, I think my favorite thing by far was the several people losing their shit over the fact that I gave Bill toes. Like, excuse me? The magical talking triangle can have fingers but not toes??? Since when was that a rule????? 🤣 (Also the one person who reblogged with the cropped panel where Bill's fishnets pants are falling off to ask why Bill peed himself. Dude, I want to examine your brain...?)
Okie-dokie, I'm sick of looking at all of this stuff now and I'm off to go to work, after which I will either scribble some more goofy "Billford" comics or perhaps draw my lame human!Bill in Situations, idk yet. Maybe I'll even finally draw more than just a single other person's human!Bill...? Who knows, but I sure hope I can mix it up a little and not turn whatever I draw into a month-long fukken project. >:\
#fanart#gravity falls#billford#bill cipher#stanford pines#the book of bill#comics#i can't believe gravity falls and billford keep on trending almost three full months after the book of bill's release#this is incredible#maybe i will add more tags later idk#i have to go to WORK now blehhhhhh#oh right: Do Not Repost (good luck anyway lol. this is So Many images and all of them are Big XD)
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In trying to work on what was supposed to be the last chapter of my FFXV fic I haven't updated in 3 years, I have accidentally added 2 extra chapters to the plan....
#I'M NEVER GONNA FINISH THIS FUCKING FIC AT THIS RATE 😭#I was stuck and also working on other things so I haven’t updated this fic since march of 2020 but I never stopped thinking about it#and now I have a plan on how to get to the end and how to like go about finishing it#AND NOW THERE'S GONNA BE 16 CHAPTERS AS OPPOSED TP THE ORIGINAL 14 😭#at least my idea is a banger and I have an actual plan now so like the end is technically in sight alsksk#everyone who has read/is waiting on What Goes In by me miss Yunalesca10 I am so sorry I'm trying to feed y'all I swear!#abby's fanfic writer power hour#final fantasy#final fantasy xv#ffxv
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Douchebag
A/n: This is honestly the BEST fic I've ever written! I took a lot from prompts I found on this site and the smut scene is inspired from a book called "The Kiss Quotient." (It was just so damn good). This fanfic is also inspired by my original fanfic, "Douchebag" Tengen x Reader. ALSO, I AM WORKING ON YUTA FICS, SO DON'T WORRY! Word count: 3.5k
Synopsis: Gojo Satrou was a man of many things. It would be hard to find anyone in the jujutsu world who hadn’t heard of his name before, whether that be through his many wins in battle or his reputation as an A-class player. Some describe him as eccentric, and others (mostly girls) describe him as irresistible. You? Well, you on the other hand would describe him as nothing else than an utter, complete, douchebag. Warnings: Enemies to lovers, teasing, fingering, intense kissing for a sec, squirting, use of pet names, belly bulge, cervix fucking, breeding kink, virgin!reader, multiple orgasms, unprotected sex, choking ~
You scoffed, watching through the classroom window as a clearly frustrated old man stormed out of the building, no doubt a higher up. No doubt the work of Gojo Satoru. "God I hate him." You hissed, turning to face a dozing-off Shoko and your other friend Haibara. The classroom you sat in was almost empty, bathed in the soft light of midday filtering through large windows. Sparse shadows stretch across the well-worn wooden floor. Rows of desks, mostly unoccupied, face a dusty chalkboard at the front. "Who Satoru?" Shoko yawned, leaning into the palm of her hand to face you. Haibara lets out a loud chuckle. "Why? Because he's an ass to higher-ups?" He nods to the window and you click your tongue against the rough of your mouth. "No, it's because he is an ass in general. His whole 'holier than thou' attitude, and don't get me started on the way he treats girls." You practically shiver as you remember the time you saw some poor girl from Kyoto Jujutsu High profess her love to the white hair man, only to run away sobbing. "I swear to god it's like he expects us to kiss the floor that he walks on, he's.... infuriating" "Who's infuriating?" Oh god, you knew that stupidly deep voice anywhere. You whipped around to find yourself face to face with the very tall white-haired man you were talking about; a shit-eating grin spread across his infuriatingly handsome face.
“You couldn't be talking about me, could you?” Satoru's voice dripped faux shock and you rolled your eyes.
“Well you know what they say, speak of the devil and he shall appear.” You spat.
“That must be why you love using that pretty mouth of yours to talk about me so much.” Satoru lowered himself to close the provoking height difference between the two of you until your noses were inches away from touching. “Cause ya love having me around doncha.”
In that moment you have to conjure up every ounce of self-restraint to not spit in his face there and then, and luckily your friends catch the drift. "Hey Satoru! What are you doing here?" Perked up Haibara who reached out his hand to dap Gojo up. "Well, Suguru and I are heading for a night out today, small club, and I thought, out of the kindness of my heart," You scoff and Gojo merely grins and continues, "I'd invite you all. Drink on me of course." As Satrou's invitation lingered in the air, you noticed Shoko's ears perk up. Her curiosity was piqued, a subtle lift of her eyebrows betraying her interest. You bit your tongue, the taste of reluctance sharp against your teeth. The idea of going anywhere with Satrou was far from appealing, but knowing your friends might join made it harder to outright refuse.
You crossed your arms defensively, leaning back slightly as you fixed Satrou with a skeptical look. "And why would you want me there?"
Satrou's lips curled into a half-smirk, his eyes lighting up with a mischievous glint."You're annoying, I'll give you that," He took a casual step closer, and leaned in closer, his voice lowering to a conspiratorial whisper, "but I never said you weren't fun."
His words, intended to irk you, did their job well. You glared at him sharply, the frustration evident in your furrowed brows and the hard set of your jaw.
Satrou chuckled.
“Great, I’ll take that as a yes then, I'll text you guys the details.” He turns around to walk out of the classroom. “See you guys there!”
There was a silence as you all watched Satrou walk away before Haibara turns to look at you. “So are you going to go y/n? Come on it will be so much fun!”
“Yeah no way in hell.”
~ You were a liar. You were a liar because here you were, leaning over the counter of a bar in a club that was far from "small." The nightclub was a pulsing, chaotic hive of activity. Neon lights flashed in syncopation with the deafening throb of electronic dance music that shook the very air. The club was jam-packed with bodies moving rhythmically, the heat from the mass of humanity palpable as the scent of sweat and sweet perfumes mingled. The bar surface was sticky under your arms, and the occasional spill from a too-hastily poured drink added to the chaos of sounds and smells around you. You lazily stirred the thin red straw into your drink, trying to politely ignore the creep who wouldn't stop talking to you.
Somehow, in the maze of gyrating bodies and blinding strobe lights, you had lost both Shoko and Haibara, leaving you stranded at the mercy of this clueless conversationalist. Despite the roar of bass and the chatter of dozens of conversations, his words seemed to bore into your ears, relentless and unyielding. He leaned in closer than necessary, trying to make himself heard over the club's cacophony, not realizing or perhaps not caring, that you were more interested in plotting an escape than in anything he had to say. "And might I say you look gorgeous tonight." It took everything you had not to scoff at this creep's words, but before you should shut the man down, you felt an arm wrap around you. "Everything alright love?" Oh god. You knew that voice anywhere. As you turned, you were met by Satrou's piercing blue eyes, their color vivid even behind stylish rectangular sunglasses. The multicolor flashing lights overhead caught in the threads of Satrou’s light blue button-up, making it shimmer subtly, and the fabric clung just right to his broad shoulders and tapered waist, hinting at the well-defined physique beneath. You hated the fact that your brain immediately noted how damn good he looked. His arm was wrapped around your waist drawing you close and you had to bite your tongue from frowning at the pet name he had given you As he leaned in, his voice was low, a soft murmur over the noise of the club, "This guy bothering you baby?" His tone was teasing, and you could detect the challenge in it, as if daring you to admit that his closeness and pet names affected you just as much as he knew it did. "Of course I'm fine baby!" You smile brightly and for a second you think Satrou looked a bit taken aback. If playing along got you out of this situation so be it. "This guy, I'm sorry, what's your name?" You glance back at the creep who had turned bright red. "I'm sorry, excuse me." You watched as the man disappeared into the throng of the bustling crowd, your attention fixed until he was well out of sight. Only then did you turn back to Satrou, the false warmth on your face instantly transforming into a cold, hard glare.
"Thanks for that, but you can get your hand off me now," you said, your voice icy as you tried to wriggle out of his hold. Despite your efforts, Satrou’s grip on your waist remained firm, unyielding.
"And why should I? I think we made a fantastic couple," Satrou cooed, a teasing lilt in his voice. His eyes sparkled with amusement, clearly enjoying the moment far more than you.
You rolled your eyes, exasperation seeping through. "You really think I would fall for something like that?"
"Why? Did you?" he probed further, his smile widening, eyes searching yours for any sign of genuine affect. Anger started to boil up inside you as your attempts to escape his grasp remained futile.
"I don't think you understand the dynamic here very well, Satoru," you began, your voice low and deliberate, each word punctuated for emphasis. You stepped closer, invading his space as much as he had invaded yours, your eyes never leaving his. "Let me make this crystal clear, I'm not someone you can just fucking conquer, and I'm certainly not one of those girls who's gonna kiss the ground you walk on with your whole 'I'm the strongest' act," you seethed.
Your face was mere inches from his now, your breath mingling, the tension palpable. "Because I know what you really are, Satrou," you hissed, the anger in your voice barely contained. "You're a fucking douche bag." "Oh? Is that so."
Satrou's expression shifted subtly, the amusement fading into something more measured, more cautious. He studied you for a moment and you took the chance to wiggle out of his grasp and make your way through the crowd on the dance floor toward the door. The beat of the music pounds in your ears and throughout your body making your synapses jump like beans in a tin can. You can barely see the floor, only flashes of bodies you frantically tried to push past. Before you can make it to the back door, a hand grips your wrist tightly enough to halt your forward rush. Above the din of the pulsating music and amidst the strobe-lit shadows of dancing figures, Satoru's face comes into view. You feel your breath catch in your throat. God his is beautiful. Strobe lights catch and accent every one of his sharp features alighting them in a multicolor color hue. He pulls your wrist to him so you're close, too close. You can smell the old spice shampoo from his hair mixed in with some sort of sweet cologne. It's a smell that makes you want to bury your nose into him over and over again. "Jesus fucking Christ y/n" he breathed his eyes searching yours. "How long are we going to keep this thing of ours going?" You furrowed your eyebrows. “Our thing? What thing?”
“The thing where we act like we hate each other but actually want to fuck the brains out of each other.” Your eyes widen and you feel your face grow deathly hot. You try to step back, get some space, some room to breathe, but the hand on your wrist keeps you from doing so
“I-fuck you” the words come out of your mouth more soft and meager than you intended to, and you find yourself locked into his blue gaze.
“Believe me, I've thought about it.” His voice is low, and his face isn't painted with a shit-eating grin like it so usually is, he's serious and his eyes are soft. Fuck it. You can no longer hear the lyrics to whatever song was playing, only a soft dull hum of the beat in your ears. Immediately your lips are on his. The kiss is frantic, hot, messy. The club's pulse thrummed through you like a second heartbeat, the noise and chaos all but forgotten in the singular focus of his presence. You could feel one of his large hands on the small of your back, drawing you in until there was no space left between the both of you. Your mouths clashed against each other as if you were both seeking something vital, something long-denied. Satoru's lips were insistent against yours, moving with a fervor that matched the pounding bass surrounding you. You whined as his tongue slipped into your mouth, your hands tangling in his hair, pulling him closer. You could feel the heat radiating from his body, the firm press of his chest against yours. The scent of his cologne mixed with the smoky air around us, intoxicating and heady.
Your mouths separated with a soft pop, and Satoru is grinning while you're left dazed, breath heavy and chests rising and falling after it. "How bout you say we get out of here Princess."Gojo's voice was a low murmur, his breath warm against your ear as you broke from the intense kiss.
Before you could even respond, a dizzying rush enveloped you. The loud club vanished in an instant, replaced by the quiet, dimly lit ambiance of his bedroom. You were suddenly on his bed, the soft duvet beneath you a stark contrast to the hard dance floor we'd just left. Right, he can teleport. You forgot about that. Wait was he... where are you going to... Before you can get a word in, he’s once again engulfing your lips with his and pulling you into a feverish kiss in which the two of you can’t seem to get enough of each other. The moment one pulls away to breathe, the other is immediately searching for their lips again; intertwining tongues and teeth clashing together recklessly.
Your hot, everything is hot, your body is burning up by the second and there’s a sickly sweet feeling in your stomach that keeps on expanding as time passes. You whine into his mouth when you feel a hand slip under your skirt and lightly trace the outline of your slit with his index finger. You're painfully wet; your arousal has made a large spot on your underwear translucent. “Just touch me,’ you whined, arching impatiently against his hand. He couldn’t make either of you wait any longer. Slowly, he brought his middle finger down and slid it gently over her folds. You threw your head back. "Ahhhh, more please." He did it again, this time his fingertip slipping between and gathering your wetness. He parted you with two fingers. You let out a gasp when he hit your clit and started to rub it in small circles. You tried to say something, anything to explain how hot you were feeling right now, but your words were lost against his soft lips. The taste of him, the smell of him, the feel of him so close against you, skin to skin. Time and space had no meaning anymore. There was only you and Satrou.
“You feeling good baby? Satrou speaks slowly, breath on your neck and voice in your ear making you shiver. You bite your lip and nod like any words that came from you would ruin it. You almost wince when you feel two fingers slip into your tight hole. "Jesus, fuck. You gotta relax princesses." He chuckled, knowing far to well that the tightness was going to feel delicious around him. Two fingers worked into you, and your eyes rolled back into your head. He began a steady rhythm as his tongue nipped and sucked the tender skin of your neck. You couldn’t prevent her hips from rising to meet his thrusts. Oh God, you were riding his hand. That had to be bad. You told herself to stop. You couldn’t. Somehow, you found your hands tangled in his short white hair. Your body was coiled tighter, grasping at his fingers, so wet now you could hear the slippery sounds every time he drove back into you. "Hnghhh.... so good." You squeezed your eyes type, becoming focused on the tightening feeling of your core and the blossoming warm pleasure. Your legs started to tremble under the unbearable pleasure and your back arched against the bed as if your body was trying to escape the euphoric feeling that coursed through your skin. "That’s it, fuck, beautiful girl... such a natural submissive...." You want to tell him he's wrong, all this pleasure wasn't because of his egotistic ass, but it'd be a lie. And as if on command, all feelings come to a heightened crescendo; explosions of euphoria clouding your brain causing your toes to curl from pleasure and your body to shake like a leaf.
It takes a couple seconds after you calmed down to realize you squirted all over Satoru's hand and all blood rushes to your face turning you a bright red.
“Oh my god in so sorry I didn’t-”
Your voice dies out as you watch Satrou pull off his shirt, revealing his extremely built body and toned muscles, to wipe the liquid off his hand. You don’t even notice that he had pulled out his dick until you feel something pressing against your entrance, making you look down and your eyes widen as you do so. Your stomach inwardly twisted, filled with the sickly excitement and your breathing started to quicken. "Shhhhh baby," Satoru cups your cheek and kisses your forehead. It was a sweet gesture despite everything happening right now, a gesture that made your heart swell and your mind yearn for Satoru. The stretch of his dick spreading your walls is insane. No amount of preparation could've prepared you for the length of Satoru's dick. You feel it heavy inside you and Satrou pushes into you until he can't push anymore, until his hips are flush against you and the tip of his length is smushed against your cervix. The pleasure of that alone felt numb, unbearable, you needed friction, you needed him to move. You practically faint when he first thrusts into you in earnest. It's euphoric; the curvature of his dick digging itself against your g-spot, scraping against your vaginal walls every time he backed his hips up. His cock pulsed inside of your silky walls, stretching you to the fullest capacity as he bottomed out again and again. "Oh fuck." Satrou groaned. He was no longer grinning, Satoru's playful resolves vanished and his smile quickly dropped. He knew you'd feel good, but he didn't expect how good you'd feel. The feeling of his hand he had fucked himself to the thought of you for so many nights was nothing compared to the real thing. It was too much, the feeling of your wet soft walls gripping him so tightly. How was he able to live without your pussy in the first place? The pleasure built rapidly, too potent, too insistent. He kneeled over you, a groan escaping his lips—a raw, primal sound that vibrated through the charged air between you. Satorus thrust your quick and hard, a clear display of strength and endurance he had gained from years of jujutsu training. "Been thinking about this, so long, bet you have to have ya~"
As Satrou's long, deliberate fingers encircle your neck, a thrilling chill races down your spine. He applies pressure gently at first, then with a firmer, insistent grip that gradually restricts your airflow, sending a wave of exhilaration through your senses. The world around you narrows, focusing intently on the point where his skin contacts yours, heightening every other sensation that courses through you. His other hand slips under your bra bra to grab and massage your breast, his thumb flicking over your nipples.
"Satoru..! Ahhhh..! I..I, fuckkkkk can't handle this.." You had no strength to answer him, only offering wanton moans in retort as he continued to wreck your body with his completely brutal thrusts. The pain of him hitting the tip of your cervix nearly every time mixed with his hand squeezing your throat it was just all too much.
Satoru. Satoru. Satoru
"Slow down.. please im gonna ahhhh~" Drool slipped passed your lips and you writhed and squirmed at the feeling of hot euphoria passed over your body in flesh arrow. "Gonna cum? Fuck baby, let's... let's come together m'kay?" Satrou almost stuttered. His body had kicked into autopilot, and a deep primal need for you settled in as he thrust in and out, creating a methodical rhythm that echoed in your ears. Your ankles lock around his lower back and you cry out when the head of his cock kisses your womb, your legs shaking as you feel yourself start to be thrown into an intense orgasm. You want to say something about the weird feeling in your stomach, how your skin is buzzing but it's all too much, and before you know it your tumbling toward the edge. It feels like your whole body was shot with electricity and color dances in your eyes as you float in ecstasy.
"Sh-Shit, shit, fuuuuck~" He chuckles into your ear, choking over his words as his hips sputter inside of you, hot cum fills you as much as you can hold inside of your stuffed cunny. Satoru doesn't pull out as you both come down from your high, instead watching you intently as you ride through the aftershocks of your orgasm. "Wanna do this again?" He chuckles.
"Fuck, yes, please."
#gojo x reader#gojo smut#jjk x reader#jjk smut#jujutsu kaisen#jujutsu kaisen headcanons#jujutsu kaisen smut#jujutsu kaisen x reader#gojo x reader smut#gojou satoru x reader
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hey kai!
can you please write a fanfic about dae ho comforting us after a game. (with a one bed trope 👉👈)
btw love ur writing smm!!🎀
EEEE I LOVE THIS REQUEST!!! dae ho is my shayla😭 (TW: Blood, gunshots, talk of death. let me know if there's more i should've added!) This is also for my favourite kang dae-ho stan @lanadelreyworshipperr
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Kang Dae-Ho x reader ────୨ৎ──── The gunshots rang from the distance as you covered your ears, your palms pressed tightly against the shell, till all you could hear was a faint ringing. You whimpered quietly as you look at the blood pooled on the floor. How quickly had they cleaned up the bodies? The smell of blood made you gag as you choked out desperate sobs. "I wanna go home..." Your teammates Gi-Hun and Dae-Ho picked you up from the floor as you took in shallow breaths. You couldn't hear anything, not their words, not the other players talking and rushing out to go back to the bunks. No. The only thing you could still hear were bodies thudding the floor and the harsh sounds of the bullets leaving their guns to pierce through the heads of the innocent people. You couldn't breathe. Everything looked blurry for some reason, getting darker and faded. If you hadn't died from losing the game, you'd surely die from this panic attack. You saw Gi-Hun run to go to Jung-Bae and Young-Il, but Dae-Ho stayed with you. You sniffled and tried to recognise the world around you, trying to ground yourself in this terrifying situation but nothing worked. It wasn't until a certain former marine picked you up from the ground, hugging you close and carrying you bridal style back to the beds through the obnoxious amount of stairs. You curled against his chest and sniffled, hearing his heartbeat and coming back to reality just enough to croak out his name to tell him you were fine and awake, "Dae-Ho..." You moved you hand to your face, wiping the remaining tears. Dae-Ho looked at you with kindness shining in his eyes. A kindness people here seemed to have forgotten, "Ah, you're coming back to us. I know it's scary but I'll protect you, ok?" His voice was so soft as he put you down to your bunk. You hadn't even realised you both had reached the bedroom already. You hand was still grasping at the sleeve of his jumpsuit like your life depended on it, and quite frankly, you felt like it did depend on it. You felt yourself slip away when he started to go back. Nobody was really paying and attention at you both and thanks to Gi-Hun, your mattresses were in a perfectly hidden spot. "Dae-Ho, stay with me?" You asked, feeling tears prickle your eyes again, you weren't sleeping yet you could feel the nightmare that would haunt you for multiple nights on end. You also felt pathetic. Everyone here was so strong, even Jun-Hee who was pregnant and here you were. You couldn't go a single game without crying. Dae-Ho's eyes softened and you could swear you saw a fondness in his eyes. Though he quickly hid it. "Of course I will. I promise that no matter what happens in these games, I'll never leave you." He said it with such surety that you two would stick together, it couldn't help but make you optimistic as well. Dae-Ho settled on your mattress besides you and took this opportunity to curl up into him even more, "I feel so dumb." His hands found their way into your hair and gently massaged your scalp. "You're not dumb. Panicking in a scene like this is... normal. I'd be surprised if you weren't. I know I am as well." He joked and you couldn't help but smile as you buried your head in his chest. "It doesn't look like it. You're so brave." You muttered and looked up at Dae-Ho's face, it was rigid for a second before turning back to the soft, smiling face she liked. "Yeah, well, you're my sunshine and you're crying. That doesn't seem right either, does it?" Dae-Ho wiped another tear that had fallen from your eyes and gently pressed his lips against your forehead. You close your eyes, feeling the exhaustion from the day finally bring you down. You fought against your sleep and also blushed at the kiss he had just given you. "Dae-Ho..." "Go to sleep, sunshine." He said and cupped your cheek, his thumb brushing against the soft round skin of your face. You gulped in fear and held him closer. "Only if you stay..." You said and pressed your forehead against Dae-Ho's, breathing in and out, slowly, following the pattern of his breathing.
He smirked and leaned closer, the tip of his nose brushing against the tip of yours, "I'll always stay." He whispered to you like a promise and before you knew, you were drifting to sleep in his arms. ────୨ৎ────
#kai's coffee order 🧸ྀི#squid game#squid game s2#squid game x reader#squid game x you#dae ho x reader#dae ho#player 388#player 388 x reader#kang dae ho#kang dae ho x reader#kang dae ho x y/n
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All Too Well | c.s.c
Summary: You thought you met the man of your dreams. He was everything you ever wanted, but what happens when that dream falls apart and when that man is no longer the one you recognise? You want to love him against all odds because you believe things can be better.
☆ 18+ minors dni |☀︎fluff | ☁︎ angst | ♕smut | ♥ completed works
Word Count: 21,190 words
Pairings: Professor! Seungcheol x Female Reader Genre/Trope(s)/AU(s): Established Relationship, break up au! Slightly (quite) toxic relationship, HEAVY ANGST, fluff, smut.
Content Warnings: There is an age gap between the reader and Seungcheol, but it’s not massive. He’s 30, and she’s 25, but it’s enough to cause problems. Seungcheol is a condescending little shit in this. Yelling, swearing, crying, arguments, toxic couple behaviours, mentions of an injury. Hospitalisation it’s nothing serious—mentions of blood. Smut Warnings: smut, unprotected sex (don’t do this). Fingering, oral (male and female receiving) shower sex, multiple orgasms, squirting and using sex as an apology. Authors Note 1: This fic will hurt quite a bit, but I like pain and write many of my experiences with my ex. It’s a form of free therapy, and it feels cathartic. Also, this story is fiction. Cheol is a fucking dick in this. This is a story that is not reflective of him or my impression of him. It is pure fiction, nothing else. Authors Note 2: Thank you so so much to my lovely @multi-kpop-fanfics for reading over this, my lovely @wooahaeproductions and @gyuwoncheol for beta'ing this fic for me 🩷 Authors Note 3: This is a Seventeen rewrite of an old Joon fic of mine, so if it looks familiar, that’s why hehe.
Taglist: @dkluvrsclub @wooahaeproductions @stayinhellevator @aaniag @seungkwansphd @tomodachiii @gyuminusone @bitchlessdino @zezedoesshit @ohmygodwhyareallusernamestaken @noiceoofed @joonsytip @miniseokminnies @wonwoos-wineparty @persnyako @deobienthusiast @the-boy-meets-evil @gyuswhore @gyuwoncheol @shuadotcom @multi-kpop-fanfics @ourdawnishotterthanourday @thegirlwhoimagined @starlight-night0 @dreamsbloomout @aaasia111 @wongyuuu @ana-marais98 @gaslysainz @cherrylita @highvern Part of the Broken Illusions Stories
© wongyuseokie 2024. All rights reserved
“Mia, I’m not going to go on Tinder to end a dry spell, nor am I going to sleep with any of the men here. They are all old and most likely married. I’m not keen,” you groaned to your best friend.
Mia had dragged you out tonight because she said that you had a dry spell that needed to be broken, but you were not going to submit to your hormones, and you surely were not going to submit to some random guy on Tinder with the worst possible pick-up lines.
“Look, I can take care of myself. Men are useless and self-obsessed,” you claimed before sipping your martini.
“Surely not all men?” A voice spoke, making you choke on your drink.
You wiped your face wiped it of what? quickly and turned around in your seat to face the voice’s owner. Your eyes widened like saucers upon seeing the man standing before you. You were speechless, and as your eyes scanned, trailed from his deep-set eyes, his impeccable build, and his thighs, thighs that you wanted to straddle and ride until you screamed his name over and over.
“Nope, all men,” you quipped, making the handsome stranger smile at you, revealing his deep dimples.
“Y/N’s been burned by useless men, men who’ve claimed to be all that and then fell short, so she’s quite cynical about most men,” Mia chimed. “Ow!” Mia yelped when you kicked her shin for oversharing.
“Well, how about I get you another drink?” The man suggested, and Mia grinned before hopping off her barstool.
“Great, you do that! I have an early shift tomorrow. Stay safe, Y/N,” Mia said, winking as she headed out of the bar, and you glared at her, knowing that her ‘stay safe’ comment also meant to use a condom.
“I’m Seungcheol.” The stranger introduced himself, and you nodded, turning around to face the bar as he sat down next to you.
“Well, you already know my name. My best friend did kind of yell it,” you deadpanned. You didn’t care how ridiculously handsome Seungcheol was. He could just be another man who could talk a big game and be useless.
“What would you like to drink?” Seungcheol asked, and you shrugged. “Surprise me,” you said. You made a mental note that if he got you some fruity shit, you’d leave him the second the words left his mouth.
“How about a Yuzu fizz gin and tonic?” Seungcheol offered, and you smiled at him, nodding.
“I can guess that if I ordered something you didn’t approve of, you would have left the bar by now?” Seungcheol joked.
“Well, now you’ll never know, will you?” You joked, making Seungcheol smile again.
“So why are you here? Trying to find Prince Charming?” Seungcheol asked with a chuckle.
“Oh, come on, be honest. I’m not one to judge,” Seungcheol encouraged, and a sly grin formed on your face.
“If you insist, then okay,” you started to say, inching closer to him, swallowing a gulp as you took in the scent of his cologne. It was musky, spicy, and woody all at once.
“I’ve been stuck in a painfully long dry spell, and my hand is exhausted. I just need to find someone to fuck me hard,” you answered nonchalantly, and you swore you saw Seungcheol gulp slightly.
“You’re telling me a woman as beautiful as you has not found a man?” Seungcheol asked as he moved away to hand you your drink. You took a sip out of the glass, smiling at the taste.
“Good?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded.
“Would you like to try?” You asked, and Seungcheol shook his head.
“Maybe later?” Seungcheol replied, and you nodded.
“But to answer your question, it’s not about looks. For instance, a guy might be doing well, then he’ll say something obnoxious, and I’ll no longer be interested,” you explained.
“Fair enough, I apologise on behalf of my species. We often get too excited when we see a beautiful woman and act up,” Seungcheol clarified, making you grin. Seungcheol was incredibly handsome and sweet, but you didn’t feel anything. Nothing clicked. There was no instant chemistry; suddenly, you felt tired and bored and just wanted to be wrapped up in your blanket.
“Well, this was nice. Thank you for the drink, but I think I will call it a night,” you said, and Seungcheol simply smiled at you. You were relieved at how he wasn’t pushy or objecting to the fact that you wanted to leave so early. Most of the men you had met would get defensive or be less than understanding if you wanted to go before they got to cop a feel.
“Wait, how are you getting home?” Seungcheol asked.
“Walking home, it’s a twenty-minute walk,” you replied.
“Y/N, you can punch me if I step out of line, but no, you’re not walking home alone.” You sighed, but you didn’t mind entirely, plus you could kick him in the crotch if he acted up. You were cognizant enough to do so.
“Well then, Seungcheol, since it’s a bit of a walk, shall we play a game?” You asked as you both stepped out of the bar and started to walk.
“Seriously?” Seungcheol asked, grinning.
“Humour me, Seungcheol .”
“Fine then.”
“Great, let’s play twenty questions,” and you proceeded to ask. “How old are you?”
“30,” he replied.
“If it’s not too rude to ask you, the same?” Seungcheol asked, and you smiled before replying, “25.”
“I have another question if it’s not too crude?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded at him to ask it. “When you said you wanted to be fucked hard, how hard?” You gulped; you swore his voice had gotten deeper and huskier since he left the bar. You chalked up your reaction to the cold air, playing tricks on your mind.
“If let’s say, hypothetically, it was me, how hard would you want me to fuck you?” Seungcheol continued , making you stop and turn to face him. His eyes were piercing and burned through any façade you had on tonight.
“Hard enough to make me forget my name,” you whispered, earning a nod from Seungcheol.
The rest of the walk was filled with silence, aside from a few questions from Seungcheol, but you couldn’t get the vision of him standing over you and asking you how hard you’d like to be fucked out of your head.
“Well,” you breathed out when your eyes landed on your front door.
“This is me,” you said, standing with your back against your front door.
“Wait, I have one thing I want to try but don’t worry, you still have permission to knee me in the balls,” Seungcheol teased, making you chuckle, only for a second, before his soft lips landed on yours. The kiss was so light it almost felt like nothing happened, but you knew it did because you felt your heartbeat out of your chest the minute his lips grazed yours.
“I always wanted to know what the Yuzu gin and tonic tasted like,” Seungcheol said smugly before moving away from you.
“Well, it was lovely meeting you,” Seungcheol said, leaving you speechless and breathless as he turned around and walked away from your front door.
“Seungcheol! Wait!” He turned around, smiling at you.
“Would you like to come in for a nightcap? We still have several questions left,” you suggested, hoping he’d say yes. Seungcheol grinned as he nodded, following you into your apartment.
Fifteen questions in, Seungcheol and you were on your living room sofa. You were cuddling into his side, your legs on his lap. Around five questions ago, Seungcheol’s hand started trailing your exposed thighs , and you had let out a few soft moans at his touch.
“Question sixteen for you, Y/N,” Seungcheol said, and you laughed at him.
“You kept count?” You asked, and Seungcheol nodded.
“I’m very detail-oriented,” Seungcheol replied, and you rolled your eyes.. Seungcheol’s hand stopped trailing your thighs; instead, he gently squeezed them.
“Tell me, how hard did you want to be fucked?” He asked again, and you quirked your brows at him.
“You already asked,” you replied breathlessly, and Seungcheol shrugged.
“Would it hurt to get details?” Seungcheol pressed staring right into your eyes. You would be lying if you said you didn’t start getting wet five questions ago, but now your core ached at his words.
“So hard that I can’t walk, so that I’m a mumbling and whimpering mess.” You said as you moved so that you were straddling Seungcheol. You gently moved your hips against his, and you felt his length hardening.
“Question seventeen for you. Why did you ask me for a drink tonight?” you asked as Seungcheol groaned and held your waist, stopping your movements.
“When I saw you in this dress, I couldn’t help but think about how I wanted to do nothing more than rip it off your body,” Seungcheol spoke, and you moaned at his words. His grip on your waist got tighter, and you were sure you would be bruised tomorrow, but you didn’t care.
“Question eighteen, Y/N, are you wet right now?” Seungcheol asked, and you smirked and proceeded to reply with another question.
“Question nineteen, Seungcheol, do you want to find out?” You asked, and Seungcheol’s eyes darkened with lust as he nodded,lifting the pushed-up hem of your dress so that it was at the waistband of your panties.
Seungcheol looked at you for consent, and you nodded, giving it to him. He pulled your panties to the side and brushed his fingers through your folds. Seungcheol moaned at your wetness, then moved his fingers to his mouth, and relished your taste.
“Final question, baby. What’s your safe word?” He asked.
“Peaches,” you replied.
“Peaches it is,” Seungcheol responded, content with your answer, he carried you to your bedroom to a night filled with absolute pleasure.
You woke up the following day to soft snores; you smiled softly at Seungcheol sleeping. Seungcheol looked incredibly handsome, even with his hair ruffled and mouth open as he snored lightly. You hated how you were romanticising this one moment, especially considering that it was the result of several drinks and very sexual questions that led him to your bedroom. Still, at this moment, you wished that this would be the view you could wake up to every day.
He was perfect. He was so sweet, loving, gentle, and kind all night long. You wouldn’t be opposed to having that type of care and affection regularly.
You decided to get out of bed and grab your oversized nightshirt as you headed to the kitchen, leaving your bedroom quietly not to wake him up andruin the little daydream you were happily living in.
You took a detour, making sure to head to the bathroom first, freshen up, and then head to the kitchen, where you made a cup of green tea for yourself and a cup of hot coffee for Seungcheol. In your hazy recollection of last night, you remembered Seungcheol ordering a couple of espresso martinis, so you assumed coffee would be a good idea.
You held the mugs in your hand as you headed back to your bedroom, smiling when you saw Seungcheol sitting up, stretching, and smiling sleepily at you when he turned his head to face you.
“Damn, and here I thought you left me,” Seungcheol joked. His deep morning voice made you feel warm, like the tea that warmed your throat with every sip.
“It’s my house,” you replied, smiling at him and handing him a mug of coffee.
“So, what do you do, Y/N?” Seungcheol asked. “Aside from rock my world,” he added, joking, making you roll your eyes at him.
“I’m a freelance web designer, but I just took a break to travel with my friends for a bit, and so I’m just getting back into it.I need to go out and hustle to get clients again,” you said, and you noticed an emotion you couldn’t decipher flash across Seungcheol’s features.
You assumed he was squinting at the morning sunlight streaming into your bedroom, but it was gloomy. Still, it was early, and maybe he was just tired.
“What do you do?” You asked, not wanting to dwell on your thoughts for too long.
“I’m an English Literature professor at Seoul National University,” Seungcheol said, and you couldn’t help but notice the hint of smugness that laced his tone. Still, then again, if you were a professor at the most prestigious universities in the country, maybe you, too, would behave that way.
“So, you’re like a nerd?” You joked and knew it fell flat, noticing how Seungcheol gave you no reaction.
“Is it still a thing to call people nerds? Youngsters these days,” Seungcheol mused, and you couldn’t help but again detect an undercurrent of an unpleasant tone that made you feel uncomfortable. You let it slide because you knew nothing about this man.
“I enjoyed last night,” you said softly, joining him on your bed, hoping to change the topic.
“I did, too. I didn’t think heading out for a drink after work would help me find you,” Seungcheol agreed.
“I, uh,” you fumbled. You wanted to ask if he would be willing to see you again, and Seungcheol got the hint.
“I want to see you again, and not just to repeat last night, but because I want to get to know you more,” Seungcheol said, and you beamed at him.
“Shit, I need to get home and shower and get to the university, but can I have your number? I’ll text you after my lecture today, and yes, I’ll text today itself because I don’t believe in the whole bullshit of waiting for a day after to tell someone you enjoyed their company. I guess that’s something I learned with age,” Seungcheol stated.
Then, you wondered if you felt Seungcheol’s age would be a motif you could never get rid of.
“Wait, so the buff hot guy, you ended up going home with him and fucking him?” Mia exclaimed obnoxiously loud in the supermarket, making you glare at her as you got a few disapproving stares from fellow shoppers.
“Oh, you need to work on your indoor voice. You will end up spilling my life story to the world,” you said, elbowing Mia, who shrugged.
“So well, was he the kind of dick you want inside you again, or what?” Mia asked as you grabbed some pasta and put it in your shopping cart.
“He asked me out,” you replied.“Well, sort of. He said he doesn’t believe in waiting a while to text, so he said he’d text me today because he enjoyed my company,” you clarified, and you saw Mia’s grin widen.
“What does he do?” Mia asked. “He’s a professor of literature and SNU,” you responded.
“Damn, I need your luck to get that kind of dick on a night out, a qualified dick, if you will,” Mia joked, making you laugh.
“I don’t know, he still hasn’t texted, and it’s nearly 7, and if he texts any later than that, it’ll just be for a hookup, and I don’t want to be a booty call,” you explained, and Mia nodded.
“Well, he’s a professor at one of the most prestigious universities. Maybe he got busy, and if he enjoyed your company, I’m sure he doesn’t only want sex,” Mia explained. You shrugged unsurely, and your phone buzzed in your pocket as if on cue.
Unknown Number: Hey, it’s Seungcheol. Sorry for not texting earlier like I said. Students had a lot of concerns, and it’s been a long day. I finally wrapped up, and if you haven’t made plans already, I’d like to take you out for a late-night dessert.
You smiled at your phone for what must have been too long, considering Mia decided to nudge you. “Fucking reply, you dork, and have him for dessert because that man must be sweet,” Mia teased, wiggling her brows at you, making you roll your eyes at her as you typed a reply.
You: Hey Seungcheol, that’s okay. Dessert? Colour me intrigued, where should I meet you?
Not even a minute afteryou sent the message, you saw the words “Seungcheol is typing,” flash across your screen, making you smile and feel giddy like a teenager having a crush.
Seungcheol: Send me your location, and I’ll pick you up.
You: Sure!
You: Location sent
Seungcheol: Perfect, see you in a few!
You grinned at your phone as Mia headed towards the check-out aisle. “Wow, he’s offering to pick you up, too. He’s already a keeper,” Mia stated, and you shrugged.
“How?” You asked, curious to understand your best friend’s logic.
“He’s going out of his way to meet you and pick you up; he wants to spend more time with you before the date. He isn’t simply telling you to meet him at a place. He is making the time and effort to take you out on a date after a busy day. That’s a good sign,” Mia explained, making you smile.
You and Mia had paid for your groceries and now were waiting outside. You were conversing with Mia when a sleek black Mercedes caught your eye. It was a sexy car, and your eyes widened when Seungcheol stepped out of the car and smiled at you.
“Sorry, I hope I didn’t keep you in the cold too long?” Seungcheol said, and you shook your head at him.
“Not at all,” you said shyly, earning a particularly hard nudge at your side from Mia, who noticed your shyness.
“I’m Mia, you must be Seungcheol,” she greeted, making Seungcheol laugh.
“I remember you, you’re trouble; you were the one who was kind enough to inundate me with Y/N’s sex life that night,” Seungcheol recalled, flustering Mia and you.
“Well, it worked out, didn’t it?” Mia countered, making Seungcheol smile, allowing his deep dimples to appear, making you smile too.
“Can’t deny that”, Seungcheol agreed, winking at you, making you smile even more, so much so that you thought your cheeks would break.
“Well, I’ll leave you to it,” Mia said as she started to walk away.
“Wait, Mia, why don’t I drive you home before we both head out on our date? It’s cold and late,” Seungcheol offered, and for some reason, that stung. You don’t know why. She was your best friend; she’d never betray you, and Seungcheol, well, he was nothing to you right now.
Mia looked at you nervously, and you shrugged before nodding. “Yeah, come on, girl, it’s cold out. Besides, it’s not a long drive,” you rambled nervously, and Mia nodded as she approached the car.
Seungcheol was nothing but a gentleman, holding the door open for youfirst, letting you in the front seat next to him, and then moving to help Mia into the back seat, and you couldn’t help the ugly feeling of jealousy that stirred in the pit of your stomach.
Why would he help her after me? You thought and shook your head to rid yourself of those thoughts. You needed to compose yourself before Seungcheol joined you in the driver’s seat.
“Alright, Mia, why don’t you tell me your address?” Seungcheol asked, flashing her a smile. You forced another smile at your best friend, annoyed at how your emotions clouded your ability to be rational, but Mia was right. Seungcheol was a catch, and you didn’t fancy losing him to your best friend.
The entire drive to Mia’s apartment was filled with awkward silence, aside from a couple of jokes from Seungcheol and a few nervous giggles from Mia. You kept your gaze on the road ahead, refusing to engage in the conversation. You hated how your insecurities got the better of you and ruined a good time.
“Thank you, Seungcheol,” Mia said softly, and for a second, you wanted to roll your eyes at her when you heard how sickly sweet her voice sounded, but then you realised that’s what she always sounded like and that your insecurity nearly caused you to ignore your best friend. You could tell Mia had noticed too as she too kept stealing worried glances at you.
“Hey, I’d never, and I’m sorry I imposed tonight,” Mia said as she exited the car and stood by your window. You let out a breath you didn’t realise you were holding and nodded.
“I know, I’m just sorry. I got insecure,” you admitted quietly, and Mia nodded before hugging you awkwardly.
“Have fun tonight. Remember, he wants to spend time with you. You’re not a second option,” Mia reassured, and you smiled at her, mentally noting to send her a long and apologetic text after tonight.
Seungcheol, ever the gentleman, walked Mia to her door and waited for her to go inside before hereturned to the car, sat in the driver’s seat, and smiled at you, which you half-heartedly returned.
“Okay, did you and Mia argue before I showed up?” Seungcheol asked, and you shook your head. “Then why did you act as if I overstepped by dropping her home?” Seungcheol questioned, and you sighed.
“Can I blame it on insecurities, and you can drop this?” You asked, and Seungcheol’s face softened.
“I want to spend my night with you, not her. How about I make it up to you over the best cake ever?” Seungcheol suggested, and you nodded, smiling at him.
The drive was filled with the music in Seungcheol’s car and lo-fi remixes, and halfway along the drive, Seungcheol broke the silence.
“So, this place is far, but I promise you it’s the best dessert place in the world. I know the owners, and I’ve known them since I was a kid, so they’re like family, so the food is legit,” Seungcheol rambled, making you smile.
“So busy day, huh?” You asked, and Seungcheol nodded as he moved one hand off the steering wheel to lace it with yours.
“Yeah, but seeing you made it all better,” Seungcheol replied, making you smile at him.
“Cute,” you replied, making him grin as he drove.
“What about you? How was your day?” Seungcheol asked, now properly holding your hand as he kept his free hand on the steering wheel and continued to drive.
“Well, I mean, it wasn’t particularly productive. I asked a few clients if they had any upcoming projects I could assist with,” you explained
“Well, you can’t be passive about it. If you want something, you need to chase after it,” Seungcheol explained and then winced slightly. “Fuck sorry, I’ve been with students all day, repeating this shit to them, and I automatically clicked into professor mode; sorry,” Seungcheol apologised, reaching gently to take your hand and bring it to his lips.
“You’re not exactly wrong, but maybe just keep the life coach’s advice for the kids?” You joked, and Seungcheol’s eyes lit up as he pulled into the familiar driveway of the bakery.
“We’re here!” Seungcheol exclaimed excitedly as he parked the car, getting out first and heading to help you.
“Oh,” you said, pointing to your grocery bag.
“Leave it here; it’s cool,” Seungcheol replied.
“Shall we?” Seungcheol asked as he closed the car door behind you and held out his hand for you; you took it, smiling as his large hand engulfed yours, making you feel safe.
“Is that who I think it is?” A voice called out from the bakery’s back, and Seungcheol grinned, hearing the voice as he replied.
“Halmeoni, it is. Cheol is hungry,” Seungcheol said playfully as he guided you into the bakery and a more petite older woman approached Seungcheol.
“Oh, you are getting buffer by the day, and I see it’s paying off. Who is this beautiful woman?” The lady asked, making you smile shyly.
“Y/N, she and I are here on a date, halmeoni,” Seungcheol explained, making you grin even more.
“Well, I’m glad to see you are dating again. After Yoona, I thought I lost you for good,” the lady added, and you felt Seungcheol’s grip on your hand tighten at the mention of Yoona. Lost him how?
“Halmeoni, not now, please,” Seungcheol warned.
“My dear, Y/N, how rude of me. I’m Minji Kim, but you can address me as Halmeoni. Why don’t you two sit? I’ll get you the specials?” Ms. Kim offered.Seungcheol nodded as he guided you inside to find a more secluded booth to sit in.
“I don’t want to talk about it,” Seungcheol said softly as you sat down. You were about to counter, saying you weren’t planning to ask him, but you decided against it. It wasn’t your place. Not tonight, at least, not on a first date.
“This is our best-selling product and Cheol’s favourite,” Ms. Kim interrupted a couple of minutes later, as she placed a molten cake on the middle of the table and placed down two forks as well.
“Enjoy, kids,” Ms. Kim said before she disappeared.
“I know it looks simple,” Seungcheol started to say, “But this is the best thing ever. Open,” Seungcheol said as he picked up a forkful of the molten cake and moved the fork to your lips. You accepted the cake, letting out a hum of approval as the chocolatey taste filled your mouth.
“Fuck, that’s amazing,” you praised, and Seungcheol smirked as he took a bite for himself.
“Halmeoni says the love she pours into the cake makes it so delicious. She’ll never tell me her recipe, even if I beg,” Seungcheol complained, and you laughed at him.
“Isn’t that better? Some things are better left unsaid. It might ruin the magic,” you said, and Seungcheol smiled slightly.
“Ah, the childlike wonder, cute,” Seungcheol said, earning a funny look from you.
“Is that a problem?” You asked, moving your hand away from him. Seungcheol shook his head.
“No, I guess I have a very black-and-white view of the world, and sometimes I fail to account that other people don’t. I like that you see the world with all its beauty and colours,” Seungcheol explained.
“Well, stick around me long enough, and maybe you’ll see the world with a bit more colour?” you suggested, and Seungcheol shrugged.
“We’ll see,” Seungcheol said, and you gathered from his tone that he didn’t fancy discussing this issue further.
“Hey, you’ve got cake on your face,” Seungcheol said, leaning forward, and you assumed he’d wipe the cake off your lips. Instead, you were met with his soft lips. You melted against his lips as they moved against yours, only for him to pull away for a second and then find your lips again. You pulled away this time with a light smile.
“Halmeoni will have the worst impression of me if all I do is make out with you here,” you joked, and Seungcheol smirked.
“I agree. How about we finish this cake, and maybe I can show you how much I wanted to spend my day with you instead of lecturing my students?” Seungcheol suggested, and you couldn’t help how your expression changed.Seungcheol caught onto it as well.
“I didn’t ask you out only to have sex with you, I promise. I want your company, but I also want to be able to hold your hand and maybe steal a few kisses here and there. I’d rather do that in a comfortable setting and not traumatise poor halmeoni,” Seungcheol clarified as he placed another kiss on your lips, and you hummed into the kiss.
“Shall we?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded.You stood up with him, placing your hand in his, and following him to the counter as he paid for the cake, much to your and halemoni’s protests. Seungcheol smiled as he walked out the bakery door, ensuring to wave to Ms. Kim. You felt yourself becoming more enamoured by his actions.
You concluded that Seungcheol could have a hard exterior, but soft inside, much like the lava cake. He could seem slightly unapproachable with his curt and short replies, but if you dug deep enough, you knew he was filled with nothing but love and warmth, and you were determined to get to know that Seungcheol.
You were determined that you could be that one for him, the one he’d let in.
“Penny for your thoughts?” Seungcheol asked as his voice took you out of your daydream of becoming the future Mrs Choi.
“I enjoyed tonight; well, everything tonight has been so incredible,” you admitted, and Seungcheol turned to smile at you, nearly running through the red light, making you laugh and gasp.
“Fuck, do you think being distracted by you is a valid reason for running a red light?” Seungcheol joked, and you shook your head at him.
“Nope, but I think it’s cute,” you said as you placed your hand on his knee.
“That impatient? We’re almost back at mine,” Seungcheol teased, and you rolled your eyes at him,pinching his knee a bit which made him laugh.
The drive back to Seungcheol’s place was filled with jokes and flirty remarks.Once Seungcheol reached his apartment, he couldn’t park the car soon enough and hurriedly helped you out,practically running to his apartment with your hand in his.
The minute you were inside his apartment, you took a second to take off your red scarf. You placed it on the coat hanger by the door and squealed in surprise when Seungcheol turned you around in his embrace, bending down to lift you into his arms and carry you over to his sofa.
You stared at him, confused. What did he want? Was it just sex? You wondered, and Seungcheol spoke, ending your worries within seconds.
“I just want to hold you like this, in my arms, look,” Seungcheol started to say as he adjusted his position so that you were lying between his body, your chin on his toned chest. “Maybe I’m moving too quickly, but I told you I don’t believe in all that bull shit of following rules. You’re the first person I’ve felt this comfortable with for so long, so forgive me if all this is too much because I can reign it in,” Seungcheol admitted as he stroked your cheek, making you smile.
You sat up for a second tokick off your boots, taking your position back, and laying on his chest. “I don’t need you to reign any of this in,” you reassured. Seungcheol was special; he was older, wiser, and something you had never had. You weren’t about to lose him for the sake of some social constructs relating to dating.
You always felt like people made up or exaggerated when it came to how love made them feel. You had friends, like Mia, who would act like they were on cloud nine or something when they were in love, and you never understood it. It wasn’t because you were traumatised as a child or anything, far from it.
You were a happy kid, but your parents weren’t in love. You knew that your parents stayed married for your sake, and while you would always commend them for that because you knew you could never do that, you never understood the point of pretending. All that to say, you never grew up with a perfect example of what love looked like, and after shitty hookups and your fair share of fuck boys and heartbreak, you gave up on the concept.
You didn’t hate love; you just assumed it was something inconceivable that others got, the lucky ones, and you, you didn’t think you’d ever get it. You had convinced yourself that for so long, until you met Seungcheol, until that first kiss with him.
Now, four months later, you watched your boyfriend working.
That was your man, your safe space, your home. Even though there were petty fights and arguments, you two would make it work because that’s what people do when they’re in love.
They fight for each other.
“Okay, I guess I’m decent-looking enough, but you’ve been staring at my face for the past ten minutes, with a smile on yours,” Seungcheol chuckled as he looked at you.
“Wait, I’ve been staring for that long?” You asked, feeling slightly flustered. Seungcheol nodded as he pulled you closer into his chest.
“What’s on your mind?” Seungcheol asked as his hand traced patterns lazily on your lower back.
“I just-,” you started to say.“Are you real?” You asked Seungcheol, who furrowed his brows at you.
“What?” Seungcheol asked
“I don’t know, I fuck. I never believed that I could have something like this,” you said shyly, and Seungcheol smiled fondly at you.
“Like what?” Seungcheol encouraged, and you took a deep breath to sit up and adjusted until you sat crossed-legged next to Seungcheol on the bed. He soon followed, sitting up, and leaning against his headboard.
“Like, I always thought love was a beautiful concept, but it was a concept that others would get, not me. I never thought I would find someone who would love me, how you do, how you make me feel when you kiss me, and how I feel when I hold your hand. Seungcheol, I feel safe with you, and that’s something I never associated with love. Love was always so unrealistic to me,” you rambled and paused to look at Seungcheol, who smiled fondly at you.
“That’s why I asked if you were real, or something I made up because I was so desperate to feel loved and to be loved,” you admitted.
Seungcheol placed his hand over yours. “You feel safe with me?” He asked.
“The safest. I feel like I’m floating. When I’m with you, I feel like you’ve taken me to a place so high, where there is nothing but love and safety,” you babbled, letting your feelings pour out and making Seungcheol smile widely at you.
“Fuck, then, this is not a good time to say this is it?” Seungcheol said, and for a second, you felt like you had come down from the proverbial cloud you were floating on.
“Uh, say, what?” You fumbled, and Seungcheol grinned at you before leaning over to kiss your lips softly.
“To say that I love you,” Seungcheol admitted, making your eyes widen.
“To be honest, I’ve been meaning to say it for a while now.I just didn’t know if it was the right time or too soon, and I didn’t want to scare you off or anything, but hearing what you said made me realise that I too have nothing to fear when I’m with you,” Seungcheol confessed, making you? at his words as you moved to crawl into his lap.
“You love me?” You asked.
“I love you,” Seungcheol repeated, and you beamed at him.
“I love you more.”
Four Months Later: The First Crack in the Glass
“How was work?” You asked Seungcheol one evening, and he groaned as he flopped into your bed, wrapped his arms around your waist, and cuddled you, making you smile. Your boyfriend might have been a big shot and a fancy literature professor, but he was a giant teddy bear behind closed doors, and in moments like this, you were reminded of it.
“You want to know?” Seungcheol asked as he sat up and stood up to take off his shirt and pull off his work clothes to change into a more comfortable pair of sweats.
“I was teaching the kids about Sylvia Plath,” Seungcheol said slowly.
“Oh, shit, I’ve heard of her,” you said absentmindedly, and Seungcheol let out a soft hum.
“She’s one of the greatest writers, and you’ve only heard of her?” Seungcheol asked. There was a hint of condescension in his voice, and you couldn’t help but feel like there was a hint of judgment from him.
“Cheol, tell me about her work,” you said, trying to push down the funny feeling his words left you with.
“I mean, what can I say? You smiled, watching him, listening intently as he fell into a soliloquy about Sylvia Plath’s writing. “The woman was troubled. Like any great artist, she used her pain to create beauty. She turned her darkest thoughts into the most beautiful words,” Seungcheol explains.
“Who’s your favourite poet?” Seungcheol asked suddenly, and you shrugged.
“I don’t know if I have one. Literature was something I liked, and I enjoyed everything I read. I don’t think I cared enough to love one author exclusively,” you replied, earning a grunt from Seungcheol.
“You couldn’t have liked it enough if you can’t even tell me a favourite author. What about a poem or novel?” Seungcheol pressed, and you glared at him.
“You sound like an arrogant prick,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol laughed and held up his hands in defeat.
“Okay, I apologise,” Seungcheol said, but the smile on his face made you realise that he didn’t mean it.
“I loved the play A Doll’s House,” you said, and Seungcheol’s eyes widened.
“You’re familiar with Ibsen?” He asked, unable to mask the surprise in his voice.
“Just because I’m not some fancy fucking professor doesn’t make me stupid,” you said, inching away from him, and Seungcheol let out a soft sigh.
“What did you love the most about the play?” Seungcheol asked.
“I guess, like Nora, I too feel like I always need to be a certain way and that people have an expectation of what and how I should be,” you admitted, looking down at your blanket, and you felt Seungcheol pull you into his arms.
“I hope that’s not because of my thoughtless remarks?” Seungcheol asked, cupping your face with his large hands, and you shook your head.
“No, but I guess just life. I just see so many people my age settling down, with a family and kids, and everything, and they have a steady job, and just everything,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol nodded, pressing a kiss to your forehead.
“So? That’s their journey, not yours, my love. You will have all those things when it’s right. You don’t need to rush it,” Seungcheol said, and you smiled at him.
“That’s one of my biggest insecurities, and I don’t think I’ve ever voiced it, not even to Mia,” you confessed.
“I appreciate that you trust me with it and know that it’s a feeling that I’ll keep safe with me,” Seungcheol promised his words making you melt.
“You’re my safety net?” You asked, and Seungcheol nodded.
“Yep,” Seungcheol responded.
“Oh, babe, my friends wanted to meet you, so I asked them over to dinner at mine, join me? I want to introduce them to the woman, who, I quote, ‘makes me less of a miserable bastard’,” Seungcheol explained.
“I’d love to,” you replied.“Wait, miserable bastard?” You asked, unable to fight the slight grin on your face.
“When Yoona and I ended things, I was a miserable bastard,” Seungcheol explained.
“Um, not to rehash shitty memories…” you started to say, and Seungcheol’s soft smile turned into a harsh glare as he spoke.
“Then don’t. I’m not interested in talking about her, and it’s none of your business,” Seungcheol snapped, and you nodded, feeling embarrassed for even bringing it up or attempting to.
“There are some things in life we keep to ourselves, right? For all our lives, a secret we take to our grave, Yoona, is that for me,” Seungcheol explained, and you sighed in acceptance, wondering how awful that relationship could have been for him to be still so resentful.
“I get it. You’ll never hear her name from me again,” you vowed.
“Thank you,” Seungcheol breathed out.
“Fuck, does this dress look okay?” You asked, waltzing out of Seungcheol’s bathroom in a black cocktail dress. Seungcheol barely looked up as he placed the wine glasses on the dinner table.
“Cheol,” you huffed, and he looked up at you.
“My friends will like you; they don’t care about what you wear,” Seungcheol said, and you walked over to the dining table with a sigh
“I get that, but still,” you trailed off, and Seungcheol shrugged.
You were about to respond when the doorbell rang. “Cool, they’re here. Just be yourself. They’ll like you,” Seungcheol affirmed, and you sighed, nodding, as you watched him open the door for his guests.
“Jeonghan, Chan, Mingyu, and Joshua, this my love, Y/N,” Seungcheol introduced you proudly, waving towards you as the four men walked into the house.You smiled and waved at them awkwardly.
“Why don’t we get a few drinks, and then we can all get acquainted?” Seungcheol offered, and the rest agreed with nods and hums.
“So, what do you do?” Jeonghan asked.
“Well, I’m a web designer, so I do a lot of freelance work,” you explained, and Jeonghan nodded, smiling. “That’s incredibly impressive,” Jeonghan complimented.
“What do you do?” You asked, and Jeonghan took a sip of his wine before answering.
“I also work with your boyfriend, except I teach law,” Jeonghan replied, and you nodded.
You were about to reply when you were suddenly interrupted by Seungcheol. “Oh, Jeonghan, don’t bore her; she’s not into the academia,” Seungcheol said. You knew he meant no harm by it, but it made you feel like an idiot.
Did your boyfriend think you weren’t smart enough to converse with someone other than him?
“Well, everyone likes criminal law, murders, and stuff,” Jeonghan joked, attempting to ease the tension, as he noticed how your face fell with Seungcheol’s comment.
“I know, I love watching crime documentaries,” you added. “Same. What would you say are your favourites? Forensic files?” Jeonghan asked.
“Y/N, you know that watching a documentary on crime, especially an extremely overproduced TV show, does not mean you understand the details of the law. You watch crime shows because you find it cool, but Jeonghan teaches the law. He respects and appreciates it immensely,” Seungcheol added, and you baulked at his words.
“Ignore him, Y/N, this pompous literature professor thinks that if you don’t like Sylvia Plath, you’re a disgrace as a reader. Seungcheol can’t understand that while her work is untouchable, it’s too much, and that’s not a mark of one’s intelligence. Rather what they like,” Jeonghan said. His last words were directed to Seungcheol and were emphasised with a particularly intense glare at him.
“Cheol, why don’t you look after the kids? Yeah, I think Joshua said something about replacing all your vintage books with decoys,” Jeonghan offered, and you were thankful for his comment as Seungcheol stalked off to the kitchen.
Jeonghan looked at you sympathetically before motioning for another man to join you in the conversation. He looked younger, and he had a bright smile.
“This is Chan. He’s the baby of the group,” Jeonghan said, and you couldn’t help but think that his words were a dig at you, but you saw no malice in his voice. He just wanted you to meet another face.
You started a conversation with Jeonghan and Chan; this time, it was just about lighthearted topics. Thankfully, Seungcheol didn’t interrupt with a patronising comment.
“Dinner’s set!” Seungcheol announced, and you sighed. You finally felt better about what happened between you two earlier, but you decided to swallow your pride and join him at the dining table.
“No way you did all this, Cheol,” A man you vaguely remember called Mingyu mumbled, and Seungcheol laughed.
“True, my love here..” Seungcheol said as he moved closer to you and wrapped his arm around your waist, pulling you in to kiss your cheek softly.
“She helped. I would have burnt the bloody house down,” Seungcheol said.You took a deep breath before nodding in agreement.
You decided you’d chalk up Seungcheol’s initial crappy behaviour to him just being nervous, and maybe he just wanted to save you from a boring conversation but just had a terrible way of executing his plan.
You’d let it go and try to enjoy the rest of the night.
Except, that didn’t go to plan. Several minutes into the conversation, Seungcheol’s grip on your hand loosened, and by the time dessert was placed, Seungcheol had his chair tilted so that his back was facing you and no longer looking at you or engaging you in the conversation.
You felt awkward. Everyone in the room knew each other except you. You were the odd one out, and your boyfriend seemed completely fine ignoring you, too. You didn’t want him to coddle you, but you didn’t expect him to turn his back on you.
You placed your hand on Seungcheol’s back once to get his attention, but he merely shrugged it off, and you felt tears threatening to spill, so you politely and wordlessly excused yourself, not that anyone noticed.
You excused yourself to Seungcheol’s study, where you found yourself a bottle of wine, and decided to sip that and stayed all night and didn’t emerge until after dinner and his friends left.
“Hey, I thought I’d find you here. Why didn’t you join us for dinner? I told them you came down with a headache, but I got to say you didn’t make me look good, doing that,” Seungcheol explained as he walked into his study, and you rolled your eyes at him as you took another sip of your wine.
“I just wanted to introduce you to my friends, and you just decided you couldn’t be bothered?” Seungcheol scolds, and you scoff.
“Why are you so pissed off?” Seungcheol asked as he sat across you, and you stood up and walked over to the window.
“I’m not pissed off. Who said I was pissed off?” You said sarcastically, and Seungcheol sighed.
“You’re acting pissed off,” Seungcheol added. You sighed before speaking.
“You acted like I was a fucking dumbass; what the hell was the comment you gave to Jeonghan? That I’m not into academia, or that I can't understand the law because I watch a Netflix show about crime? You made me look like a fucking moron,” you spat.
“Look, whenever I try to show you anything about my work, you get bored, and you either fall asleep or can’t keep up. I was trying to save you that with Jeonghan,” Seungcheol replied, and you stared at him in shock.
“I don’t fall asleep because I’m not interested. I fall asleep because you talk to me like a student. You lecture me; if you spoke to me about your work the way you do with your friends, with that same enthusiasm, then maybe I’d pay more attention, but you fucking don’t!” You shot back, making Seungcheol sigh.
“So, what was I meant to do? Let you try and have a conversation with Jeonghan about the law, something you know nothing about?” Seungcheol asked, and you nearly slapped the smug look off his face.
“Fuck you. You don’t need to have a master’s degree or prior knowledge about a subject to be interested in it and for fucks sake. I just wanted to get to know your friends, but whenever I tried, you intercepted the conversation with a comment that just made me sound like a fucking child,” you yelled at him, and Seungcheol groaned.
“This was meant to be a good night, and you’re making it all about you,” Seungcheol mumbled.
“Me? How? You barely acknowledged me, you turned your fucking chair around and didn’t look at me during dinner. You barely tried to include me. Your friends, they’re all older than me, and you made no fucking effort to include me,” you yelled at Seungcheol.
“You have a mouth. You could speak up. No one would stop you,” Seungcheol offered, earning a glare from you.
“Why would I fucking do that? Whenever I contribute anything, you show up to either call me an idiot, or when I do try to get your attention actively, you fucking shrug me off. Do you know how that feels?” You asked, your voice trembling.
“Fuck don’t cry. That’s not fucking fair. I don’t even remember the fact I shrugged you off. You can’t attack me for something I don’t even know about,” Seungcheol retaliated.
“Fuck can you just acknowledge that you fucked up a little bit? You’re making me feel so fucking stupid,” you choked out, and Seungcheol shrugged.
“I don’t think I’m making you feel that way. I think you’re making yourself feel that way,” Seungcheol offered, and you glared at him.
“Fine, then, if I’m so fucking stupid. Then, I should just let you be. I’m going home. I don’t want you to feel even more stupid with me around,” you snarled, slamming your wine glass down hard enough to startle Seungcheol but not hard enough to break the glass.
You stormed out of the room as Seungcheol helplessly followed after you. “Wait, Y/N, fucking wait. It’s late, please just stay until the morning, and I’ll drop you off; I can’t drive you home yet, I’ve had too much to drink for it to be safe,” Seungcheol argued, and you scowled at him.
“I don’t fucking need this. I can take a cab,” you said, grabbing your phone, and Seungcheol shook his head at you.
“Not a fucking chance, not so late, please; just let me sober up, and I’ll drive you back?” Seungcheol pleaded, and you gave in.
“I’m going to clean up,” you said, shoving past him and heading into the kitchen as you started to clean up the mess.
“Let me help,” Seungcheol offered, and you ignored him. “Babe, please, I’m fucking sorry, just let me help you?” Seungcheol asked again, and you failed to notice how close he was standing next to you. You bumped into him, managing to drench yourself in red wine.
“Fuck,” you hissed out as the tears threatened to spill over.
“Go, take a shower, I’ll clean up,” Seungcheol said, taking the glasses out of your hands, and you nodded as you silently walked back to the bedroom and stripped, putting your black dress in the laundry hamper and stepping into the shower.
You felt the tears stream down your face. As you washed up, you started to rationalise the fight in your mind. Maybe you had overreacted, or maybe Seungcheol just got caught up in the moment, hell you’ve been guilty of that yourself when you meet your friends, so why should you hold him to a different standard?
You stepped out of the shower, wrapped yourself in one of Seungcheol’s fluffy white towels, and headed out of the bathroom to find Seungcheol sitting looking forlorn on the edge of the bed.
“I’m fucking sorry,” Seungcheol mumbled, and you sighed as you leant against the wall.
“I may have overreacted a bit. I just wanted to feel loved, but I get it, time and place,” you said.
“I do love you, and tonight I acted like a fucking ass. I just wanted to impress my friends, and I did it at your expense. Can you forgive me?” Seungcheol asked.
“I can,” you said, holding out your hand to him, which he took and walked over until he was towering over you.
“How can I make it up to you?” Seungcheol asked as he placed a soft kiss on your lips, which you gladly reciprocated.
“Well,” you started to say as you undid the towel, letting it drop to the floor, and Seungcheol smiled at you.
“You want to make it up to me, Cheol?” Seungcheol nodded furiously. You reached down and placed your hand gently on the top of his head and moved his head so his face was at your cunt.
“Show me how sorry you are,” you said, guiding his head into your pussy. Seungcheol gently pushed your back into the wall. He lifted your leg and wrapped it around his shoulder. He started by placing soft kisses, gently kissing your cunt. He ran his tongue over your folds, moaning as he tasted your arousal.
“So sweet,” Seungcheol praised and dove back in with more desperation. He moved his tongue to your clit, and flicked his tongue against it. You moaned in approval, and he continued his movements.
He suddenly pulled his mouth away from your core, lifted you, and walked over to your bed. He laid you down gently, and his mouth found your cunt again. Seungcheol positioned himself on his knees at the edge of the bed, his tongue now reaching your entrance. He pushed his tongue inside you, and you mewled at the feeling. He shoved his tongue further into your cunt, and his hand reached your clit.
He rubbed at the swollen nub, and you soon found yourself cumming on his tongue. Your hips bucked against his face as you rode out your orgasm. As soon as you got down from your high, Seungcheol shoved two fingers into your pussy making you squeal at the oversensitivity.
He pushed his fingers deep inside of you until he reached a rough patch of skin, and you squealed. He smirked, and he started moving his wrist up and down, making his fingers repeatedly hit the spot inside you. It had you seeing stars.
Your second orgasm hit you harder as you felt yourself squirt for him. You were clawing at the bedsheet for support; the way he made your body feel was incredible. He latched his full lips around your swollen clit as he furiously pumped his fingers inside you, and a few short licks and you fell apart again.
You whimpered into the bedsheet, which was now soaking wet, and you reached your hands out for him. He smirked, and he pushed you back further onto the bed as he stripped himself. Seungcheol then climbed over and on top of you. He grabbed your legs and wrapped them around his waist. His hard cock was resting against your aching cunt. Just seeing his length made you delirious.
He was so thick the first time you had sex with him, you couldn’t even comprehend his thickness. He made you feel so full and had indeed ruined you for other men. His length was perfect, it was able to go deep inside you, and the thickness another word allowed you to feel so good. He filled you up. You bucked your hips against him, rubbing your wet folds against his cock, and he hissed at that. He pushed himself into you, and you moaned at the stretch.
His hands moved to unwrap your legs and positioned them around his neck. The new position allowed him to go deeper, and he pushed deep into your cunt. His thrusts were paced perfectly. Slow enough to make you feel every inch of his cock, and fast enough to make you moan.
“Harder, Cheol,” you whimpered, and Seungcheol smirked. He pulled out of you and flipped you over onto your hands and knees. He realigned himself and pushed into you.
You and Seungcheol always played rough and pushed each other beyond your limits. Your pussy was making obscene noises as you had cummed so hard. He picked up his pace, knowing he would not last much longer, and his grip went to your throat. You somehow found the ability to tap his hand, letting him know to choke you harder. You liked it, and so did he.
His grip around you tightened. He pushed into you, and you fell apart again. This time, you screamed into the pillow, and Seungcheol released not too long after you. He flipped you back over, laying you down on your back. He moved down again to your pussy, and licked and sucked. He moaned, tasting your release and his.
He always did this; he wanted to lick your pussy after cumming inside you. You didn’t complain. A few more licks and one final suck to your entrance, and you came once again. He placed the last kiss on your cunt and pulled you into his arms.
“I’m still so fucking sorry,” Seungcheol apologised, and you rolled over to place your head on his chest.
“It’s okay, just don’t do it again?” You said, and Seungcheol nodded, pulling you into a soft kiss as he held you until you fell asleep in his arms. The feeling of safety was still there, but why did it feel like there was a slight tear in the safety net that was your love?
You shook it off, thinking it was expected. Couples fought.
You two would be fine.
“Morning gorgeous,” Seungcheol mumbled the following day as he wrapped his arms around your waist while you made tea.
“Hi,” you replied, turning around to face him as he pulled you into a soft kiss.
“I want to talk to you about something,” Seungcheol said, and you looked at him nervously.
“Chill, it’s not a bad thing. Well it is, but it doesn’t affect us,” Seungcheol explained as he guided you into the living room and onto the sofa.
“Yoona, she was my first love, my first everything. Well, not everything, but she sure felt like it. I thought she and I would be together for the rest of our lives. I proposed, and she said yes, and somewhere along the road, everything went wrong. I found out she cheated several times while we were engaged,” Seungcheol explained as you held your breath.
“So, whenever she is mentioned, I get agitated because she ruined me and made me cynical until I met you. You make me happy, happier than I’ve been in a very long time,” Seungcheol explained, and you sighed, feeling terrible for him.
“I want to continue making you happy for a long time, Seungcheol. I won’t ever hurt you like her,” you promised, making him smile at you.
“I love you, and I’m sorry for last night. Look, there’s a cocktail party at the university next Friday evening. I’d like you there and want to show you off to everyone. I want to show off my girl,” Seungcheol said proudly.
“I’d like that,” you said, placing your lips on his plush ones.
You, too, would be fine. It was a slip-up, not a crack in the safety net—just a slip.
“Good god, I was starting to think that Seungcheol had kidnapped you or something,” Mia joked, making you laugh nervously as she entered your apartment and hugged you tightly.
“Why would you think that?” You asked, genuinely concerned about why your best friend had such a vivid imagination.
“Well, you’ve only spoken to me a few times within the four months that you and Seungcheol have been dating, and I say this with as much honesty as I can. Don’t become one of those girls that ditches all her friends once she finds a guy,” Mia joked, but you knew there was some weight to her words.
“Mia, that was in university, and it happened once. I’m not the same person anymore,” you defended, and Mia nodded.
“So why did you want me to come over, girls’ night, or trouble in paradise?” Mia asked, and how you chewed your bottom lip nervously was enough of a tell for Mia to sigh and understand.
“Why don’t you sit? I’ll grab the wine, and I’ll explain everything,” you explained another word, and Mia nodded as she kicked off her shoes and got comfortable on your couch.
You handed her a glass of cabernet and held another glass for yourself as you sat down on the sofa and started telling her about every detail for the last four months. It was going well until you finished recalling the details of last night’s fight.
“Wait, he did fucking what, and you fucking forgave him? Why because he made you cum?” Mia accused, and you cringed. You had just finished recounting the entire story of the dinner with Seungcheol.
“He made a mistake,” you mumbled, and Mia scoffed. “A mistake is forgetting to order dessert, not ignoring your girlfriend, or treating her like she’s a bumbling idiot!” Mia fired back, making you sink into your seat.
“Sorry, you need to talk to him about this. Sex is not an apology, and why did you forgive him? Did he just gaslight you into forgiving him? Is that what happened? Did he say that you’re being crazy or shit like that?” Mia interrogated, and you kept shrinking in your seat.
“Mia, shut up. Stop using such extreme words for him,” you whimpered. You didn’t like how loud her voice had gotten, and she sighed.
“He used sex as an apology. Y/N, do you not know how big of a red flag that is? And the fact that you gave in makes it even worse because you’ve now set the precedent that he can pull this sort of shit with you, and you’ll forgive him if he makes you cum hard enough!” Mia rattled off, and you wanted to smack her if it meant shutting her up. Instead of being rational, you decided to defend your boyfriend, even if it meant doing it at the expense of hurting your best friend.
“Mia fuck you. You were in a relationship with, what was that guy’s name, you remember, the one who cheated on you for four months straight, and you kept taking him back. You’re going to lecture me about being spineless in my relationship when you let a guy walk all over you for four months straight because you were so fucking desperate!” You snarled and regretted the minute the words left your lips because you saw how hurt overtook Mia’s face and how her lower lips trembled.
“I haven’t seen this side of you in a while. You were like this in university, where once you fell for a guy, you became blind to his every flaw and then lashed out at anyone who tried to tell you otherwise. You know what, Y/N, you know where I live. Find me when you decide to take off your rose-coloured glasses. I can’t bear the sight of you right now,” Mia said, placing the wine glass down on your coffee table and storming out of your house.
You felt awful, but Mia was wrong to assume that Seungcheol would use sex as an apology instead of actually apologising instead. You shook your head and sighed, finishing your glass of wine. You would reach out to Mia eventually.
“Fucking hell, you look beautiful, my love. I might just be the luckiest man alive,” Seungcheol praised as you stepped out of your bedroom.
You wore a red evening gown that exposed enough of your chest to be enticing but also respectable for a formal event at a university. You topped off your look with makeup that brought out your best features and slipped on red strappy heels.
“Shall we?” Seungcheol asked.You looked up at him. He was wearing a black suit, and you honestly wanted to skip the university party and have him take you right here. Now, as if he could read your thoughts, Seungcheol laughed.
“Don’t worry, you can rip this suit off me after tonight,” Seungcheol said, making you laugh too as you took his hand and headed to the party.
“Y/N! So lovely to see you again,” Jeonghan greeted when you and Seungcheol entered the venue.
“What about me?” Seungcheol joked childishly, making Jeonghan roll his eyes.
“Needy, isn’t he?” Jeonghan teased, and you laughed.
“But you love me,” Seungcheol said, and you smiled
“I do,” you said, making him smile backbefore he looked up, and he suddenly froze as his eyes fixated on a figure across the room.
“Cheol?” You asked, noticing how Jeonghan also looked tense as both men intently stared at the figure, now making her way across the room to greet them.
“Jeonghan, my favourite law professor, you know my students miss you dearly!” The lady joked.
“Yoona,” Jeonghan acknowledged, and you, like Seungcheol, felt as if all the air had been sucked out of the room.
This was Yoona?
This was the woman that broke Seungcheol’s heart? This woman, who Seungcheol failed to explain, worked alongside him. She was a colleague of his. He saw her every day at work, and nowhere during the four months did he think to mention that he still worked alongside his ex-fiancé.
You also felt Seungcheol let go of your hand, and you could have sworn he inched away from you.
“Seungcheol, it’s so lovely to see you, and who might this be?” Yoona asked as her gaze turned to you, making you gulp and then pale in horror as Seungcheol could not answer for a second.
“She’s a friend,” Seungcheol mumbled, and you saw Jeonghan shake his head slightly, and you sighed at him, holding your hand to out to Yoona
“Pleasure to meet you. How do you know Seungcheol?” You asked, feigning innocence, and you heard Seungcheol fail to bite back a hiss.
“I’m a colleague of his, and oh, I guess we have some history, actually pun intended on that.I teach art history here. Are you a prospective student?” Yoona asked, and you stared at her and looked back to see Seungcheol ’s poker face staring back at you.
“No, I’m not a student. I’m amazed that you’d think that,” you replied, unable to keep the slight bite use a different word your tone had to it.
“Well, what do you?” Yoona asked, and you were about to answer when Yoona beat you to the punch.
“Well, you must be a fellow academic. Our Cheol here has a type,” Yoona said as she shot you a wink and waltzed away from the conversation, leaving you a mess and Seungcheol angry.
“Okay, I’m going to leave you two to it,” Jeonghan said as he rushed off too. You started to feel the room close in on you and you just wanted to leave.
“Would you excuse me? I need to make a phone call,” you said hastily as you ripped your arm out of Seungcheol’s hold and nearly ran out of the ballroom and outside to a quieter area of the venue until you found a secluded bench to sit on as you gathered your thoughts.
“I thought I’d find you here,” you turned around to see Seungcheol standing, staring at you withhis hands in his pockets and looking at you with an emotion you couldn’t decipher. Was it guilt or annoyance?
“That’s Yoona?” You asked, and Seungcheol simply stared at you.
“The Yoona?” You repeated, and Seungcheol sighed, nodding as he walked over to stand across from you. You could not look at him.
“What?” Seungcheol asked, and you let out a dry laugh at his ability to be so damn obtuse.
“This is the woman who broke your fucking heart. You work alongside her, and you never once thought to, oh, I don’t know, mention that she is not only your ex but your fucking colleague?” You snarled another word, and Seungcheol sighed.
“Grow up, adultshave to- what?” Seungcheol paused mid-speech when he saw you glaring at him.
“Do not fucking patronise me. This is not an age issue. Your ex,who at the mention of her name, you become a frigid bastard.You failed to mention that you work with her!” You repeated, raising your voice.
“What do you fucking expect me to do to? Run away? We met here, fuck, I’m a grown man. I can’t run from my problems!” Seungcheol shouted back, and you sighed.
“You don’t get it do you?” You choked out.
“No, because you’re acting like a fucking child, and I am not one. I need to deal with every situation, no matter how unpleasant it is!” Seungcheol spat.
“Fuck, shut the fuck up about being more mature because you’re not, not even for a fucking second. How the fuck do you expect to have a future with me when your past is there in front of your eyes every fucking day, and the worst part is that you never told me. You act as if I gave you this new lease on love, but now I don’t know if that’s something you can sustain because the woman who broke your heart is your colleague. What if one day she wants to try again? How do I know that I know that you won’t go running?” You rambled, letting a tear slide down your face.
“You’re being selfish and so fucking unfair,” Seungcheol retorted.“Do you not think so?” Seungcheol asked rhetorically
.“Fucking hell, I told you she cheated on me while I was fucking engaged. Do you think I have no dignity or some shit that I’d go back running to the woman who ruined me?” Seungcheol yelled, and you shrank into yourself.
“Can you just do what I do, and fucking grow up and realise that in life you need to put up with people who you may not what anything to do with, but that’s what being an adult is like?” Seungcheol continued to yell, each word piercing your heart.
“Oh, then again, what would you fucking know about being an adult? You are a 25-year-old with no fucking direction in life. You have no stable job or anything stable. In contrast, all your friends are either settling down, and you fuck, you sit at home with no motivation to go out and find yourself some work,” Seungcheol yelled, using your biggest insecurity against you.
“You have no fucking stability, and you act like a fucking child, so don’t you dare lecture me on how to behave,” Seungcheol spat and then sighed deeply when he realised what he said.
“Y/N-,” Seungcheol started to say, and you held your hand up to him.
“No, fuck don’t, Cheol, don’t you fucking dare. You used my biggest insecurity against me. Who the fuck does that, huh?” You asked, and Seungcheol sighed, looking down.
“As for stability, you’re right. I don’t have a ton, but if there was something that I thought gave me some semblance of stability, I thought it’d be you.I thought that at least it would you, but you aren’t my safety net anymore, are you?” You yelled, and Seungcheol looked down in shame.
“I’m sorry. I told you seeing her makes me turn into something else!” Seungcheol weakly defended, and you glared at him.
“No. Fuck you, you don’t get to do this. What about being an adult, huh? Being an adult means not getting set off by every situation that doesn’t favour you. Instead, it’s about finding ways to cope. It’s about setting boundaries, so your past doesn’t hurt you and hurt the people in your present,” you choked out the last word as Seungcheol took a step forward towards you.
“Y/N,” Seungcheol started to say, and you ignored him.
“Just fucking go back to your party. I’m going home. I’ll text you, but please leave me alone for tonight,” you said, pushing past Seungcheol.
“Please let me know when you get home,” Seungcheol said weakly, and you rolled your eyes at him.
“I said I would, didn’t I? Now, fucking move,” you spat, storming out of the garden and out of the venue as you waited for your Uber to arrive.
You had barely gotten home that night when you heard someone pounding on your front door. You groaned, knowing it was Seungcheol. You glared at the front door, hoping that if you ignored the incessant pounding, then he’d get the hint and he’d just leave, but Seungcheol was relentless. You knew that.
You sighed, walking to the front door and opening it to reveal your teary-eyed boyfriend.
“Baby, can I please explain?” Seungcheol asked, and you ignored him as you let him into your house, and he closed the front door behind him.
You started walking back into the house, Seungcheol trailing behind you. Once you were inside, you turned to him, and before you could say anything. Seungcheol dropped to his knees, hugging your waist, begging for forgiveness. You ran your hands through his hair.
“Cheol, it’s okay.”
Seungcheol carried you to the shower, where he helped you shower and clean. He helped you dry up and pulled you into his arms once you were both curled up on the bed.
Seungcheol ’s fingers were gently ghosting your cunt. You felt him turn you to face him; he captured your lips in his full ones. His hand finding your core, rubbing your clit, he did this till you fell apart. He repeated that almost four times until he pushed himself inside you till he came.
You couldn’t sleep that night. Only one question plagued your mind.
Since when did sex make up for an apology?
You woke up the following day sore and worn out. Not just from the fight last night that left you out and alone in the cold but also from Seungcheol fucking you into the mattress. You heard faint snores from him, and you took it as an opportunity to get some alone time. You wondered, did he think sex would make up for what had happened?
After showering and cleaning yourself up, you headed to the kitchen to make breakfast, subconsciously making breakfast for two. You were stirring the noodles waiting for the water to boil, when you felt two strong arms wrap around your waist. You felt Seungcheol place kisses along your neck, and you melted into his embrace for a second until the events of last night came back to you.
“Cheol, can you set the table up? I’ll get breakfast ready.” You said and you felt Seungcheol press a kiss to your cheek before running off to set the dining table. Once you made your way over with the contents of breakfast, you sat down and started to eat.
“Baby?” Seungcheol’s voice broke the silence, and you looked up to see him staring at you. His eyes were red, brimming with tears. You felt your heart clench.
“Y/N, I’m so sorry about last night,” Seungcheol started to apologise again; his voice was breaking as he tried to contain himself.
“Which part, Seungcheol? The part where you failed to introduce me as your girlfriend, or the part where you threw my insecurities against me, or the part where you told me to grow the fuck up?” You fumed.
“All of it, all of it,” Seungcheol said, standing up to kneel in front of you. “I fucked up so much, but,” Seungcheol started to say, and you interrupted him.
“If you think that fucking me last night made it better, it didn’t because now I’m wondering if you think sex is the solution to all our problems,” you said.
“Never, I just, I’m shit with words at times, and I knew that at least my actions could prove my love to you. It’s a shit thing to do, but I didn’t do it to distract you from last night,” Seungcheol replied.
“I want to talk about everything, but I want a breakdown of everything. First, why did you pull away from me when you saw Yoona? Were you embarrassed?” you asked, your voice breaking, and Seungcheol shook his head.
“Of course not,” Seungcheol replied swiftly, and you glared at him.
“Because all I do wonder if when you call what we have love, you never call it what it is,” you admitted, and Seungcheol sighed as he stood up.
“Come on, let’s talk on the couch,” Seungcheol offered, and you stood up, taking Seungcheol ’s hand as you walked over to your couch.
“I tell you, I love you,” Seungcheol said, and you nodded.
“You do tell me that you love me, but the way you do it is like it’s a secret,” you mumbled, feeling a tear roll down your cheek.
“I get that I’m younger, and I’m not some fancy professor with a huge savings account, but the way you act at times, you act like you are ashamed of me. Fuck, for Yoona to say that you deviated from your type to date me. What does that mean? Am I some charity case, where you’ll date a non-academic girl, and then later I’ll be a notch in your belt, a funny story to tell over Christmas, with your real wife, and everything?” You babbled as you broke into a sob, and you felt Seungcheol pull you into his arm as he hugged you tightly.
“You think about a future with me?” Seungcheol asked, and you scoffed.
“Is that all you took from everything I just said?” You asked.
“No, but it gave me hope. Look, Yoona brings out the worst in me, and you were right last night to tell me that as adults, we can let that jar us or act out because that’s life, right? Meeting people and getting to know people you may not like is life, but Yoona, at one point, was my life. She was my future until she ruined it. Every time I see her, I lash out because I’m brought back to the headspace that I was in when she cheated,” Seungcheol explained, pausing to take a breath.
“She reminds me of every insecurity I had, she takes me back to a very dark headspace, and instead of working my way out of that, I lash out because fuck, I’m scared that it’ll happen again,” Seungcheol admitted looking down.
“You think I’d cheat on you?” You asked.
“No, but you’re young, gorgeous, and still have so much ahead of you. I woudn’t blame you if you found someone your age,” Seungcheol mumbled, making you scoff again.
“I’m with you, aren’t I? Unless this is your plan? Pushing me so far that I no longer want to be with you? Is that what you’re trying to do?” You asked, and Seungcheol shook his head immediately.
“Then why the fuck is this constantly an issue?” You snapped, and Seungcheol winced slightly at your tone.
“I guess when I first started dating you, you were so different and, in a good way, a fresh breath of air, but everyone around me started joking that maybe you know it was just a fling because we are so opposite at times. However, as the months with you progressed, I know that’s not it.I know I love you, and I’m so fucking sorry that for so long I made you feel otherwise,”
Seungcheol paused to take a breath. “I love you, and I am serious about this. I want to make this work, I do,” Seungcheol admitted another word.
“Then stop lashing out at me and talk to me. Stop running away from me, run to me instead,” you said softly, and Seungcheol smiled at you.
“I didn’t mean what I said about you having no stability. It was so fucking shitty of me to use your insecurity against you. I just, fuck, there’s no excuse, I’m just fucking sorry,” Seungcheol apologised, his head hanging low.
“Yeah, that stung. Look, how about we take a week, cool off, and I guess catch up in a week?” You offered, and Seungcheol agreed.
“How’s this, I’ll plan a getaway for us, and I’ll cook us food too!” Seungcheol suggested, and you laughed.
“I’ll follow a recipe to a tee and have Mingyu monitor me?” Seungcheol proposed making you grin at him.
“Fine, but if I get sick from your food,” you started to say, and Seungcheol laughed.
“Then I’ll kiss it all better for you,” Seungcheol said lamely.
“I’ll see you in a week, my love, and remind you why you fell in love with me,” Seungcheol promised as he placed a soft kiss on your lips, and you smiled as you watched him walk away.
You let out a breath you didn’t realise that you were holding when he walked away. You nodded to yourself. You and Seungcheol would be fine, this was a slight tear in the safety net, but you two would be fine, you convinced yourself, for it was only a tiny tear.
“Hey,” you mumbled, embarrassed, as Mia opened her front door the following evening.
“What, have you come here to tell me I deserve no love or something?” Mia spat, and you felt like you had been slapped, and looked down in shame. You deserved that much.
“Mia, I fucked up. Can we talk, though?” You asked, holding the box of doughnuts in your hand, and she sighed, nodding as she let you in.
“So, what, I’m assuming the Mr. Perfectly Wrong fucked up again?” Mia mocked, and you sighed as you kicked off your shoes and sat on her couch.
“He was engaged in the past, and she was like his dream girl,” you said, unable to stop the way your voice trembled at recalling Yoona and realising how she was the opposite of you. She was dignified, elegant, older, wiser, or whatever other negative thought you tortured yourself with.
“She still works with him. They both teach at the university; he never told me, Mia. I had to find out because I met her at a university event,” you mumbled, unable to stop the tear that slid down your face.
Mia sighed as she sat down next to you, and you took it as a positive sign to launch into the story of the fight.
“Oh, that mother fucker!” Mia swore, and you flinched at her expression.
“Mia, he was hurt,” you mumbled, and she scoffed.
“How many excuses do you want to give this piece of shit? I get that love is blind. I fucking do. You cruelly pointed it out to me, but let me tell you something, my love, he’s blinded you. He’s no good for you. He’s condescending, judgmental, rude, and worst of all you keep forgiving him when he gives you half-assed apologies!” Mia ranted, making you look down in shame.
“Is that who you want to fucking be with?” Mia asked. “A man who keeps you like a secret, aman who acts like you’re a kid, a man who talks down to you?” You sighed.
“Maybe it’s just a bad spell. He’s not like this, ever,” you defended, and Mia groaned, rubbing her forehead.
“This man, I don’t care how good the sex is or how amazing the good moments are. The good moments aren’t enough to mask that he is inherently flawed and has a complex. A complex that he will project onto you, and you will struggle to try to meet the ideal woman in his head. Still, you’ll try all your life because that woman doesn’t exist, and not to be unkind, but it’s because that woman will never exist for him. He doesn’t know what he wants,” Mia explained, calming down as she sat down next to you.
“He said he loved me,” you mumbled weakly, and Mia nodded.
“I’m not denying that he cares for you, but his ego comes before you, Y/N. You will bend over backward for this man, and you have, but see if he even bothers to put in an ounce of that same effort that you put into this relationship,” Mia continued , and you glared at her.
“You know what? I didn’t come here to be yelled at. I get enough of that from him!” You seethed, and Mia frowned at you.
“There, right there, if you can’t even figure out what’s so fucked up about that sentence, then I don’t know what even to tell you,” Mia said.
“We’ve hit a rough spot, but we’ll be fine,” you shouted, almost as if you were convincing yourself more than Mia.
“You know what, I’ll be here when this illusion is broken,” Mia mumbled, standing up, and you took that as your cue to leave.
You stormed out of Mia’s house and drove straight to Seungcheol’s.
“Baby?” Seungcheol asked when he opened the door and saw your downcast expression.
“What’s wrong?” Seungcheol asked, and you shook your head at him.
“Can I stay here? I know we’re meant to meet at the end of the week, but I just need you,” you asked.
“Of course, my love, you know where everything is. I just have to grade one more paper. Then I’ll join you?” Seungcheol asked.
You were so worn out from the week's dramatics that you quickly showered, changed into one of Seungcheol ’s shirts, and headed to bed. You curled up in Seungcheol ’s bed. You smiled when you felt him join you later that night, his arms wrapped tightly around your waist.
Protecting you, never letting you go, he was your safe space.
You woke up the following morning to something stroking your thighs, and you opened your eyes to see Seungcheol ’s head placed between your legs. He was kissing your inner thighs, slowly making his way to your cunt.
You moaned as you spread your legs, placing them onto his shoulders. Seungcheol ’s luscious lips wrapped around your clit.
As he sucked, his pressure was perfect. He pushed in two fingers and thrust them in your cunt, as he sucked on your clit. He licked and fingered until you came around his fingers. Occasionally, he would run his tongue up and down your wet folds but always go back to your cunt.
“Morning, princess,” Seungcheol greeted as he hovered over your body and captured your lips in a sweet kiss. It felt like the first time you slept with him.
Passionate yet soft, you felt loved, and that was not something you felt in his embrace for a while.
“Morning, handsome,” you mumbled sleepily as Seungcheol pulled you on top of him. You felt his cock hard and waiting. You moved and sat up and slowly sank on his length.
“Fuck!” You let out a groan of pleasure. He felt so good inside you. You lifted your legs and started moving your hips, riding him. You felt his grip tighten on your thighs as he helped you ride him.
You wanted to see him fall apart underneath you. You trailed your hands to his fingers, and your nails grazed his nipples, making him buck into you. You moaned as his hips pushed his cock deeper inside you. You kept riding him until you felt him still and released inside you. You sighed, feeling his warmth fill up your cunt. You hadn’t cum yet, and Seungcheol knew that.
“Princess, over here,” Seungcheol motioned to your mouth, and you moved, legs shaking as you sat on his waiting tongue. Seungcheol, as always, licked you clean of his cum.
You both were still in bed in the afternoon, simply embracing and kissing each other, when Seungcheol spoke, breaking the silence.
“So, do you want to make the trip a little earlier?” Seungcheol asked, and you looked at him, smiling.
“Can you take leave on such short notice?” You asked.
“Baby, it’s reading week for the students, so yes, I don’t need to worry about them for now. I want to focus on us.”
~~A Trip Upstate~~
“Got everything?” You asked Seungcheol for the fifth time. You had to stop yourself from laughing as your boyfriend kept going back and forth between his apartment and his car, forgetting something with each trip.
“Wait, oh, for the fucking love of god. I forgot the car keys,” Seungcheol groaned as he ran back into the house, and you laughed at him some more. You were still laughing when he came back.
“Hi,” Seungcheol said sweetly as he wrapped his arms around your waist, capturing you in a warm hug.
“I like seeing you like this, happy and laughing,” Seungcheol said, making you smile at him.
“Well, you make me laugh and happy,” you admitted, placing your chin on his chest and looking up at him.
“I’ve been fucking that up a lot, but I promise you, this time I won’t fuck up. I love you, and I need to get back to showing you that it’s not an empty promise,” Seungcheol spoke, and you reached up to pull him into a soft kiss.
“I love you, and thank you,” you mumbled against his lips.
“Shall we, my love? There’s a nice cabin I want to take you to upstate, and it has our names written on it,” Seungcheol said , and you nodded as he helped you into the car.
The drive up to the cabin was filled with jokes, laughter, and a few kisses here and there. It felt normal. Like you finally got your Seungcheol back, like all the fights could be forgotten because he was back to normal here. However, that hope ended the second you and Seungcheol started fighting over how to cook a dish.
“Why are you so mean about this? I’m helping you; you don’t even know how to peel a fucking onion!” You snapped at Seungcheol, who was crushing the microwavable rice packet.
“I might not know how to peel a fucking onion, but at least I’m not a 25-something that has no fucking direction in life!” Seungcheol spat back, making you exhale deeply.
“Y/N,” Seungcheol started to say, and you glared at him.
“No, Cheol, what the fuck, what the actual fuck? You’ve been using my insecurity against me twice now, and what-do you think each time you apologise, I’ll come back crawling? Or something? I’m tired of this, and I’m,” you took a deep breath to collect yourself.
You would not let Seungcheol see you fall apart, not when he was the reason behind the tears.
“We’re done,” You stated calmly, glaring at Seungcheol, who didn’t dare follow you as you walked away,.You grabbed your overnight bag and called an Uber, heading out of the cabin.
You weren’t sure if you had properly ended the relationship between the two of you, but you were tired of constantly giving him the benefit of the doubt, and for him to only shatter it the second he felt remotely attacked.
1 Month Later: The Breaking Point
“Don’t you fucking dare,” you mumbled to Mia, who had picked you up from the floor of your house last night. You had called her on your way back home, and thankfully she didn’t ask many questions, and just tried to help you.
Since you left Seungcheol, you didn’t know where you two stood. He made no effort to contact you, so you just assumed that since you yelled. “We are done,” at him, that you were.
Seungcheol took the hint and left you, but what pained you the most was that he could never run after you.
You craved his touch, his voice. You wanted him, but his lack of effort made you think he wanted nothing to do with you. Were you just a waste of time for him?
You thought that what you two had was a masterpiece, or what was that before he tore it all apart? Or was it you? Were you the one who tore it all to pieces?
All that to say, you had held yourself together, well, or at least you could put on a happy face. You just plastered on a fake smile and went on about your day. You put your efforts into your job out of spite.
You wanted to prove to Seungcheol that you weren’t some bumbling idiot, but instead, you were a 25-year-old with things going for her. You wanted him to see you wanted him to be proud of you, but he wasn’t here to see it. Maybe he never cared.
Your breaking point was this afternoon. You had just secured a huge contract, and just as you had signed on the dotted line, you wanted to share it with Seungcheol. You froze mid-text when you realised that he wouldn’t care. He wouldn’t care if you had done something remarkable because you two were done, so why should he care?
So, you started bawling at home and shakily dialed Mia’s number, and that’s when she came to your rescue. She came to find you when you were at your lowest, and you felt guilt engulf you. You had defended Seungcheol to her, insulting her viciously, but she never batted an eyelid.
“You know most people say thank you,” Mia joked, and you sighed.
“I am thankful, trust me, more than you know. I know you want to say I told you so, so go for it,” you snapped, and Mia shook her head as she helped you sit on the couch.
“He lost the one real thing he had. That’s not on you. He never fought enough for you,” Mia explained as she pulled you into a gentle hug, which made you blubber and, thus, make you cry more.
“Nothing, nothing from him, for a fucking month, Mia! Nothing. I thought he loved me and saw a future with me and all that bullshit, but he did not fucking bother, not once, to even be like, are you okay? Nothing, he just, fuck, wait, I think my phone is ringing in the bag. Can you help me grab it?” You asked, and Mia nodded, scrunching her nose at the private number.
“I swear if it’s that fucker calling through a random ass number to get to you, he’s going to get the living lights smacked out of him,” Mia threatened as she handed your phone to you.
“Hello?” You answered.
“Hello, Miss Y/N. We have been given your number as an emergency contact. Do you know Mr. Choi Seungcheol ?”
“I’m sorry. Who are you?” You asked, your voice trembling. What happened to Seungcheol?
“Sorry, I’m Nurse Lee. I’m calling from the Seoul National Hospital. We have been given your number as an emergency, so we are calling to ask if you could come down and sign a few things for us?” You sighed in relief, but only slightly.
You got into your car, not caring if you got a fine for speeding. You reached the hospital and parked, running in your heels to the main lobby. You frantically explained that you got a call and were quickly ushered upstairs to the wards.
You heard laughing and opened the door to see your ex-boyfriend laughing with the doctor. His eyes widened as he saw, and just like that, his laughter faded. The doctor noticed your presence, and he waved you in.
“You must be Y/N. Thank you for coming here. We just need to discharge him, and we need you to sign a few forms for him.” You nodded, still confused, “I’ll be back in around thirty minutes. I’ll let you two catch up.” The doctor left the room and left you both alone.
“Cheol?” You said softly.
Seungcheol wasn’t looking at you. You walked to his bedside when you saw there was enough space. You sat down slowly and held his face in your hands. He reluctantly looked at you.
“What happened?” you asked. You let go of his face so he could talk.
“It’s not a big deal,” He said. You rolled your eyes.
“It is, especially if you’re in the hospital.” You countered.
“Don’t laugh.” He said, warning you. You nodded. “So, long story short, I may have dropped a knife on my foot.” You looked at him, perplexed.
“How?” “I was cooking, and it was going well. Then the knife slid off the counter and onto my foot. I didn’t lose a toe, just a lot of blood. So yeah, by the time I got here, I passed out from blood loss, and I guess that’s why they called you.” He blurted in one go, and you tried to stifle a laugh.
“Seriously?” He said, but you could hear the smile in his voice. His heart warmed at the sight of you smiling. It had been so long since he was the reason for your smile.
“I’m so sorry, but why were you trying to cook?” You asked.
Seungcheol ’s laugh faded, and he paused. “I noticed a lot about me that I’m not good at. Cooking is at the top. I felt as if I could attempt to conquer that maybe I can do more in life,” Seungcheol looked down at his hands covered in wires. You touched his thigh, making him look at you.
“You are good at so much,” you countered, and Seungcheol shook his head.
“Professionally, maybe, but my personality? No. Nothing great there,” Seungcheol said, resignation lacing his tone. You opened your mouth to say something, and Seungcheol spoke first. “I’m not saying this to guilt-trip you into taking me back. After you broke up with me, I started seeing someone,” your hand jerked away from his thigh, which confused Seungcheol until he saw the heartbreak on your face.
“No, Y/N. I meant seeing a professional,” Seungcheol said, laughing.
“Sorry,” you mumbled, unsure what you were apologising for.
“If you think I’m even close to being able to move on from you, you’re insane.”
“Come on, let me drive you home?” You said, Seungcheol nodded.
“I appreciate it, thank you.”
While driving, something occurred to you, and you had to ask. “Cheol, um, how come I was your emergency number? Last I remembered, you said it was Jeonghan?” Seungcheol blushed and scratched his neck.
“Uh, well, it’s embarrassing now, but I changed it three months into us dating,” his confession, making you almost drive through a red light.
“Why?”
“Ugh, I sound so stupid because we’re not together, but I guess I wanted you to know I trust you. I know my actions during our relationship were deeply contradictory to that. I also knew that you would be the one for me.”
“The one? In three months?” You asked.
Seungcheol smiled fondly at you. “Can you pull over?”
Seungcheol fished out his wallet, looked for something, and pulled out a small silver ring.
“Seungcheol, what the fuck?”
“Trust me; it’s not a proposal. I don’t think I’ll be that lucky. I just thought it was something I should get after three months. I wanted to give this to you, but then I hurt you so many times after, and each time, we tried to make it work, and I kept on fucking it up for us. It was a promise ring that I’d never hurt you again, and I guess I failed.” Seungcheol admitted, and you noticed a tear fall down his face.
“Why do you still have the promise ring?” You asked.
“Wishful thinking, I guess?” Seungcheol replied.
“I miss you,” you mumbled, and Seungcheol heard you.
“We can try again,” you offered weakly.
“No, not yet. Let me learn. Let me be a better man for you. If I can’t, then know you deserve so much more,” Seungcheol spoke, and you smiled softly at him.
You resumed driving. Upon reaching Seungcheol ’s house, you pulled up and helped him out of the car and into his apartment. You laughed when you saw the floor covered in blood. It was not a normal reaction, but the backstory was quite amusing.
“Hey, Cheol, why don’t you lie down? I’ll clean this up for you?” You said.
“No, I can manage,”
You glared at him. “Trust me,it’s safer that I do this,” You laughed as you watched him hobble to his bedroom. Thank goodness he didn’t live in a multi-story house.
After cleaning up, you found Seungcheol sitting in his bed, playing music and softly humming. You knocked on his door. Seungcheol smiled and waved you in.
“Hi.”
“Blood’s gone,” you said, and he patted the space next to you, and you sat down on the bed next to him.
“Thank you. Somehow, you’re always cleaning after my mess.”
“Seungcheol, don’t,” your voice firm.
“I cannot even begin to tell you how sorry I am. Fuck, come here,” he patted the space in front of him. You carefully moved and sat between his legs so as not to hurt his bandaged foot. Seungcheol pulled your hair to the side, kissing softly on the nape of your neck.
“Just please, don’t break me apart again because I don’t think I’ll recover anymore if you do,” you pleaded, and Seungcheol turned you around in his embrace so that you faced him.
“Never again, I promise,” Seungcheol promised. bullshit
“Okay, so where is your boyfriend?” Mia asked, venom dripping off every word, and you rolled your eyes at her.
“He probably got caught up with work. Can you fucking let it go?” You asked, and Mia shrugged.
“I’m just saying, for a man walking on thin fucking ice, he better at least bother with his girlfriend’s birthday party,” Mia stated before walking out of the room to place balloons in another part of your apartment.
You sighed, knowing she was right, but Seungcheol was busy. Maybe he’d be late, but he’d show up. You kept telling yourself this until midnight when he never showed up, but you were several drinks in and had enough liquid courage to storm over to his place, which is precisely what you did.
You hailed a cab and made the drunken journey to his.
Your conscience was warning you. You paid no attention.
Yousure as hell ignored it for long enough. You could continue to do so.
You knocked on the door, and the door opened to reveal a shirtless Seungcheol in a pair of black sweats. You had lost all sense of rationality, and at this point, you didn’t know what was right or wrong.
“Y/N?” Seungcheol asked, confused, as would anyone. He couldn’t help but take in your appearance, how your cleavage left little to the imagination, but he knew the reality was better, how your heels made your ass seem even rounder. Your face was beautiful as always, but your mascara had run slightly, and your nose was red.
“Can I come in?” You asked. He nodded quickly, letting you in and closing the door behind him.
Seungcheol slowly guided you to the sofa, and he sat down, waiting for you to sit beside him. Instead, you straddled him, your legs on either side of his hips.
“My birthday. I got a crappy, “happy birthday” text from you, and you don’t show up to my party. What the fuck is wrong with you? This is not the attitude from someone who wants another chance,” you fumed, and Seungcheol stared at you sighing. He had no excuse, none whatsoever.
“Y/N, I—” You shut Seungcheol up with a kiss. You rolled your hips against his crotch, and you could feel that underneath his sweats, he was naked. No boxers. You could partially feel his cock against your lace-covered cunt.
“Y/N, I, what’s going on, fuck,” Seungcheol stopped speaking as you started sucking his neck, gently grazing your teeth against his neck andmaking him whimper for you. You felt his cock harden fully underneath you. You pulled away from his neck for a moment.
“Cheol, at this moment, I need to forget that I’m mad at you,” you admitted, and Seungcheol sighed before nodding as his grip on your thighs tightened.
“I’m not saying no; you don’t need to apologise, and you don’t need to leave, but we need to talk when we’re done,” Seungcheol added.
“I will.”
“Good.” Cheol stood up from his position and carried you into the bedroom. And he noticed your makeup had smudged and brought you to the bathroom. He placed you on the counter, his lips immediately finding yours. Kissing you, his lips pulled and sucked on yours. You moaned, allowing him to slip his tongue inside your mouth.
Seungcheol deepened the kiss. His hands found the straps of your dress; he pushed them down. You hissed as your breasts met the cold air of the room. Seungcheol helped you out of the dress, leaving you in your soaked underwear. He groaned at the sight. His hands went to your legs, pushing the heels off your feet, his lips never leaving yours. He moved his hands to your underwear and pulled it off. He groaned when he saw how wet you were.
He pushed his sweats down and undressed; he stood erect and naked in front of you, and you took a moment to drink in his appearance. Seungcheol guided you into the shower, and you let out a moan, when you felt the warm water hit your skin. Soothing you, you felt Seungcheol turn you around and push your back against the wall. He placed kisses down your neck, his lips finding your breasts. He sucked and nibbled your nipple as his other hand massaged and squeezed and tugged the other breast. Cheol moved his body down yours as his lips found your cunt.
Seungcheol placed a soft kiss. He gently lifted a leg and wrapped it around his broad shoulders. He pushed two fingers inside of you, groaning at how wet you were, where he could practically taste your arousal. He angled his fingers inside you and started to finger you, and his lips found your core, as he ran his tongue against your folds.
He pulled your clit between his teeth, gently grazing the swollen bud. You whimpered. He replaced his teeth with his plush lips. Wrapping them around your clit and sucking as his fingers pounded into you. He kept his movements up until you came. You tightened against his fingers, and your clit throbbed in his mouth as he helped you ride out your orgasm.
Seungcheol gently unhooked your leg from his, and you sank to your knees. You pushed against his toned abs, and his back hit the shower wall. You wrapped your lips around his cock; he was thick. While your hands wrapped around the remainder of his length, you took him and started to suck him. He let out a low growl and a strangled whimper as you continued to suck him. You grazed your nails along his thighs and whimpered, bucking his length into your throat, making you gag slightly. You kept sucking until you felt him still and releasein your mouth.
You smirked as Seungcheol was panting. He pulled you two on your feet and into a sweet kiss. He cleaned the both of you up, his hands finding your face and washing the smudged mascara off your face. He guided you out of the shower and to his bed. You moaned as you felt the soft sheets against your naked body.
Seungcheol couldn’t get enough of you. His eyes drank you in. His mouth was desperate to taste you again. He approached you, lifted your legs, and placed them on his shoulder. His mouth found your cunt again. He started by placing soft kisses against your cunt, knowing where to lick you.
He wasted no time. He dove straight in, his thick tongue flicking against your swollen clit. Your hands made their way into his hair. He pushed in three fingers this time. He lapped at your arousal while you whimpered in oversensitivity. It didn’t take much after that for you to cum on his tongue.
Seungcheol rubbed his cock against your wet folds several times and then pushed in. You hissed as the stretch was quite intense after two orgasms, but he felt so good. You tugged on his hair, making him look up at you. You brushed your thigh against his hardened length, and he wasted no time.
“Move”, you whispered, and that’s all it took for Seungcheol to lift your legs and place them on his shoulders, allowing him to hit deeper inside you. His thrusts were rough, and each time, he would withdraw only to push back harder and deeper.
He leaned down and captured your lips in his. You melted into the kiss while he pounded into your cunt. You were a mumbling and moaning mess underneath him. You felt yourself clench around this length, making him groan into the kiss. He pushed a few more times until you fell apart on his cock.
He pulled out of you gently and laid down beside you.
You woke up a few hours later, not realising you had fallen asleep.
You woke up to at least thirty texts and missed calls from Mia, and you sighed, stepping out of Seungcheol’s bedroom to call her. You quickly told her what happened last night, and Mia could only relay her disappointment.
“Do you not see how far gone you are, Y/N; you’re making excuses for him. People like him don’t do this just once.”
“He was busy and couldn’t make it,” you explained, and Mia scoffed.
“Y/N, I’m telling you as someone who has been through something like this. He will leave you broken.” You scoffed, and your following words were nothing but pure venom.
“Mia, you had a relatively hot boyfriend, and he dumped your ass. So I guess you’re not too different to me since the only thing you’re good for is looking the way you do. You couldn’t keep him either..” You kept your voice stern and firm.
Mia groaned. “I won’t ever say I told you so, but when the inevitable happens, you know where to find me. I’ll listen because I know you won’t.” With that, Mia hung up.
You sank to the floor.
How did a loving relationship with your boyfriend leave you so drained and lashing out at others to defend him? What went wrong?
“Hey, did I interrupt something?” Seungcheol asked, startling you, and you stood up, shaking your head. You didn’t want to get into it with him right now.
“Here,” Seungcheol said, handing you a coffee mug, and you nodded, taking it.
“You’re right. My actions last night weren’t of a boyfriend trying hard to prove that he’s worthy of being with you,” Seungcheol explained, and you rolled your eyes.
“I’m tired of hearing you apologise. I need you to show me that you’re fucking sorry,” you said .
“What about a date tomorrow? There’s a gala at my university. Don’t worry, it won’t be like last time, I promise,” Seungcheol begged, and you sighed, nodding.
You weren’t exactly sure what made you want to give him a second chance, but maybe because you loved him or the idea of him, you weren’t entirely sure which one. You just knew that regardless of what the situation was with you two. With him, it still felt like home somehow.
DIVDER:
You and Seungcheol walked hand in hand to his gala; this time, he wasn’t distant, curt, or moody. He was jovial, greeted everyone, and introduced you until Yoona entered the picture.
Seungcheol wasn’t flirting, but he sure as hell didn’t bother to hide how happy and excited he was to see his ex, considering he spent nearly 45 minutes talking to her. You stormed out of the venue and waited by his car until he noticed.. oblivious to your anger.
“Waiting long?” Seungcheol asked, and you scoffed.
“I’m amazed you remembered I existed. You seemed to be taken by Yoona. I thought I was a distant memory,” you mocked, earning a glare from Seungcheol.
“Let’s just go home, yeah?” Seungcheol asked, and you nodded, following him into his car.This time, he didn’t help you in.“When the fuck did I give you a reason to think I’d cheat? How many times do I need to fucking tell you that Yoona and I are done?” Seungcheol bellowed suddenly, and you sighed.
“That’s not the fucking point!” You yelled back, and Seungcheol sighed, loosening his tie.
“The point is that you always gloss over our problems, you always act like I’m a child or something, and you never tell me the truth. When I get mad, you act like I’m insane even to be upset. Do you know how that fucking feels?” You yelled, and Seungcheol glared at you.
“Not my fucking problem thatyou don’t understand how the fuck relationships work, or maybe you’re too fucking immature to make one work,” Seungcheol hissed as his grip on the steering wheel only got tighter.
“This is so fucking rich coming from you considering the fucking fact your ex dumped you, and yet you’re so obsessed with her that you didn’t care that she cheated on you. Instead of spending the night with me, someone who loves you, you cosied up to someone who walked all over you!” You yelled.
“Y/N, get out of the car before I make you!” Seungcheol yelled, making you whimper at his tone and words.
“Seungcheol, please, I’m so sorry,” you were begging, but Seungcheol ignored you. He leaned over and opened the car door. You looked at him; his eyes were trained on the road ahead.
“Seungcheol, please don’t do this,” you begged. You knew you couldn’t change his mind, but you were scared. He didn’t seem to care. You reluctantly exited the car, gently closing the door behind you. Seungcheol wasted no time, and he sped away, drove off, and left you alone in the dark.
You were freezing, and your outfit did nothing to counter the cold. You let out a sob, your feet in absolute agony from the heels, and your mind an emotional mess. You pulled your phone out of your purse to call someone. You called Seungcheol, no response. You sighed more. Seeing as he would ignore you the entire night, you called the last person you could think of.
“Y/N? What? It’s two in the morning. What do you want?” Mia’s voice was hoarse and laced with sleep. You tried to reply but couldn’t help the whimper that escaped your throat.
“Hey, what’s wrong?” Mia asked, her voice now concerned.
“I don’t know where I am, and it’s dark and cold. I’m so sorry for disturbing you. I shouldn’t have—”
“Y/N, stop, pin me your location. I’m coming to get you,” You sobbed out a thank you and sent her your location.
Around twenty minutes later, you saw a car enter the empty street, and it screeched to a halt suddenly. Mia stepped out with a coat and ran towards you. She wrapped the coat around your body. She didn’t ask questions; she just guided you to heris car.
“Let’s get you home,” Mia said. She was fuming, but she was scared that if she yelled at you now—which she surely would, she’d break you into two.
“Do you want me to come in?” Mia asked as she pulled up outside your apartment, and you shook your head.
“I just need time alone, but thank you, Mia,” you said, who nodded as she watched you leave the car before waving to you and driving off.
“Baby! You’re safe!” You turned around to see Seungcheol running after you, and you sighed as you walked into your apartment. Seungcheol followed you, and this scene was one you knew all too well.
“You threw me out of the car!” You yelled the minute you were inside the apartment.
“I was scaredI’d say something worse if you stayed. I was trying to mitigate further damage.”
You rolled your eyes at him.“You’re a fucking moron.”
“I am, but I came back, I—” you interrupted him.
“For what? To apologise?” You asked, and you hated that hope still coated your words.
“No, because I can’t do this anymore. I can’t, you’re acting so fucking immature, but we’re not good for each other. I need someone who gets me. I can’t coddle you every five seconds because you got your fucking feelings hurt,” Seungcheol said, finality lacing his words.
“So, if we were closer in age, we would have worked?” You asked, and Seungcheol sighed, nodding.
“I’ll send someone for my things, and I’ll mail your things back to you by the end of the week,” Seungcheol mumbled as he walked out of your apartment.
He left as quickly as he came into your life. You’d experienced heartbreak before, but nothing like this. You wanted to die. You tried to stop feeling because the pain manifested into physical pain as you felt your entire body go numb and limp. You couldn’t handle it, and you felt all too much all at once.
The Reeling
It had been two weeks since Seungcheol broke up with you and after he returned your things to youin a box with no goodbye letter and nothing to give you any semblance of closure, you impulsively booked a train ticket to see your folks
If Seungcheol didn’t want to coddle you, you tried to find comfort in the two people you knew would.
“Y/N?” She was confused by how upset you were. Your mother practically yelled when she saw you at the front door, and you burst into tears the minute she saw you and hugged her.
“I missed you,” you cried into her arms while she was happy to see you.
“Come in. Why don’t you go to your room freshen up?” You nodded.
“Hi, stranger.” You said, scaring your father, who was too engrossed in a crossword puzzle.
“Y/N!” He yelled, standing up to hug you.
“Oh, who’s ass do I need to kick for you crying?” You shook your head.
“No one, I just missed you guys,” you lied, and your parents nodded knowingly.
“Freshen up, honey. We’ll be right here with food and a drink?” You nodded at your mother and headed to shower
“Seungcheol,” You answered your phone that was ringing. You had just gotten out of the shower and were drying your hair.
“Uh, hi. Sorry, I wanted to pick up my hoodie. I left it at yours, but you weren’t there, and I just wanted to check when you’d be back so I could get it?” Seungcheol asked, so casually, so casually cruel.
At least he was honest. You knew nothing was left there anymore,
“I’m visiting my folks; I’ll send it to yours when I’m back,” you said, keeping your tone neutral and devoid of emotions.
“Cool. Thanks,” Seungcheol said, hanging up before you could get a word out.
You broke down again. He called you, only to break you all over again.
“So, it’s a boy problem? It’s got to be,” your father mused after dinner. You two and your mother were in the living room, sipping wine and catching up.
“I was a fucking idiot. I gave him a chance after chance,he walked all over me, and I let him because I loved him,” you whined to your parents, who smiled sympathetically at you.
“I would rather you didn’t call yourself that. I didn’t raise one.” You smiled at your dad’s attempt to be funny.
“Well, I was,” You sighed, sipping the wine. You decided you’d tell your parents everything aside from the ridiculous amounts of sex that led you up to this moment.
“Why did you want to try so hard to keep him?” Your mother asked, and you shrugged.
“Because I loved him, or so I thought I did, but love shouldn’t hurt this much,” you mumbled. “You know what? I was right when I believed that love is this huge thing that doesn’t exist, and aside from you two, I don’t see it anywhere.” You said, and your parents smiled softly,
“Honey, love isn’t easy. It takes so much effort and time to get it right, and even then, you can screw it up.”
“Then what, I screwed up?” You accused, and your mother shook her head.
“No, you tried and broke yourself into two to become someone he wanted. That is the furthest thing from love. It’ll hurt, but one day, when your paths cross again, you’ll be able to smile at him with no malice and thank him for putting you through hell because you’ll know what you never want again,” your mother explained, pulling you into a tight hug as you sobbed.
“He couldn’t even be bothered to attend my birthday,” you mumbled, sniffling pathetically, and your father nodded.
“That’s not a good sign, if I’m being honest, isn’t it meant to be fun, a birthday party?” Your father asked, and you could only shrug.
“Get your hair done or something,” your mum suggested the following week.
“Why?” You asked, and your mother smiled at you.
“Well, isn’t that what everyone does after a breakup? Get their hair done, and you’ve been moping for a week. Go outside, go and see the colourful world out there,” your mother said, kissing your forehead.
You laughed but decided to take up your mother’s advice, and soon enough, you found yourself in a hair salon.
“So, how do you want your hair done?” The stylist asked as he started to towel dry your hair.
“I’m not entirely sure, but something that screams I’m doing good and happy.” The stylist smiled.
“A few highlights and waves?” He suggested, and you grinned. You relaxed into the chair as the stylist worked on your hair.
You smiled at your appearance in the mirror. You felt fresh. You still felt pain, but the new hair did do wonders. You’d never understand the logic, but it helped, only for a second, until a voice stopped you in the shopping mall.
“Y/N?” Your blood ran cold, and you’d recognise that voice anywhere.
“Yoona,” you muttered, turning around as you faced her.
“Did you change your hair? I like it. It looks lovely!” Yoona smiled.
“Can I help you, Yoona?” You asked, not having the energy to pretend to care.
“I heard you and Cheol broke up?” Yoona said, and you cringed at her use of his nickname.
“Why, are you waiting to dig your claws into him?” You snapped, and Yoona shook her head.
“Look, I have no defense for what I did to him, but I’ll say this: There is an idea that Seungcheol has in his mind. Even if I didn’t fit that mould, should I have cheated? No, but it wouldn’t have mattered because I would never be enough for him, and neither were you. He has a version of a woman in his mind, which doesn’t exist. You dodged a bullet, my Y/N,” Yoona narrated as she walked off, leaving you speechless.
It was on your walk that all the puzzle pieces fit together. Yoona wasn’t wrong—granted, an unreliable source—but her words weren’t exactly wrong. You bent over backward to appease Seungcheol, but nothing was enough, and if Yoona, his “ideal girl,” failed to meet his idea, then what was his ideal?
A never-needy, ever-lovely jewel whose shine reflected on him? Was that all he ever needed: someone to make him look better?
You smiled, turning back to see Yoona walk into another shop. Maybe she was right; it’d take a while to reconcile and face the trauma of dating Choi Seungcheol, but you knew it wasn’t you anymore. You could have been carved by the gods themselves, but unless that god were Seungcheol, you would never be enough for him, and somehow you were okay with that.
You just needed now to heal, mend old relationships, and find yourself again, but you were a soldier who came back from war half her weight. You needed to regain strength from this, heal, and become someone who had learned from this.
You could do it. You’d get older and wiser, while his lovers would be the same, wide-eyed and keen until he tore them to shreds when he realised they weren’t the one.
You could move on. You’d be fine.
The Healing: 2 Years Later
You were fussing over your speech for the fifth time that day.
“Girl, it’s fine, you’ve worked your ass off for this app. I can’t believe you got SNU to sponsor this. You’ve grown up!” Mia said dramatically, making you laugh.
You two were okay again; it took a lot of healing, but you two were okay because you didn’t hurt anymore.
You were at the launch of your newest app, a website for students and teachers to connect quickly.You wanted to pitch it to SNU, and they agreed.
You had finally finished your presentation when your eyes locked with his.
You flashed him a smile, and he returned one.It was like nothing you imagined at that moment. Nothing hurt anymore; he was a painful memory, but he was your past.
You would sometimes wonder if the love affair between the two of you maimed him the way it maimed you, but you also figured that you could live without getting that answer from him.
You’d be okay. You weren’t okay then, but you are okay now.
You were okay before you met him, and you’d be okay after him.
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Okay. So.
It’s no secret that I’ve been eagerly anticipating season 2 of The Night Agent so I made the very adult decision to take a vacation day from work and binge watch the whole thing in one day. And I have some thoughts.
Obviously spoilers lay ahead so please be aware of that before you continue reading if that’s something you care about. There might also be some swearing.
It’s not often we see a Netflix show get to season 2 and more importantly, have a season 2 that either lives up to or exceeds season 1 but I think The Night Agent is one of them. Season 2 is SUCH an experience, one that I was desperately worried about before it aired, and one that I am so happy I got to participate in now that it’s done. I was worried that the show would forget the events of season 1, that Rose would play a less integral role, that the show’s bigger and better storylines would be overdone, that they would play America as the hero when dealing with plot lines regarding international relations - none of those fears came true.
Though the showrunners were in uncharted territory having no other Matthew Quirk novels to adapt, they did a fantastic job in creating a new situation that felt similarly dire and equally as convoluted as the events of season 1. And the events of the previous season are directly referenced, and Rose continued to be integral, and the bigger and better storylines were handled well, in my opinion at least.
The overarching result of the events of season 2 however, has to be… tragedy. So many different characters have their lives upended, affected, or changed and it’s all just tragic. The character of Noor, an outstanding addition to the show, risking everything to get her family into a better situation only to lose her brother, traumatize her mother, and receive a cheque from a smiling bureaucrat for her efforts. Warren’s son Ethan, having to go through the betrayal of a friend (David), meeting his estranged father, getting so much conflicting information about his dad, only to lose him and be traumatized forever. Rose, desperately wanting a normal life but unable to fully process her grief and trauma because the only person she fully trusts left her and isn’t coming back. Even Alice’s family and the way they had to deal with their broken hearts when she took the Night Action job and stopped keeping in contact with them.
And finally… Peter.
Peter, who is a good man and wants to do the right thing but keeps getting into situations where the right choice has consequences. Who desperately wanted to clear his father’s name only to learn that it was all true and then have to make the same choices to save the one person he loves. The soul crushing tragedy of the scene with Peter and the broker in the rail car as he taunts Peter with the knowledge that by making the choices he did, he will become his father and follow in his footsteps. The absolute fucking agony on Peter’s face.
And then the tragedy of Peter telling Rose to forget him, because he knows that he cannot keep her safe and she will be used against him even though she means “everything” to him. 😭😭😭😭
My poor shipper heart.
Although I, and I suspect a lot of people, would have loved to see a happier ending for Peter and Rose, I will say that this one felt true to the story they were trying to tell. I can think of other ways this could have gone to get them that ending which I will definitely be exploring in fanfic but I can see why this choice was made. That scene in the hotel broke my fucking heart. Again, the absolute agony on Peter’s face.
So… yeah. Just, tragedy all around with this season.
I do want to mention a few things that I really appreciated about the new episodes. First, that Rose continued to not be a damsel in distress but rather continuously came to Peter’s aid and helped him out, much as she did in the first season. Second, the character of Javad was INCREDIBLY acted by Keon Alexander and made for an excellent villain, even if not the ultimate one. Holy shit, watching the shifts from romantic interest to quiet, seething menace on his face and in his demeanour throughout the show were so compelling. Third, all the scenes between characters at the Iranian mission. I was really worried this storyline would feel rushed but instead we got so many sweet moments between characters such as Haleh and Noor and an insight into their relationships.
Some specific moments I loved:
- Noor wearing her friend’s headscarf to the event at the mission
- Haleh warning Noor that Javad knew she was at the UN even though it could have cost her her job
- The ambassador’s handling of how to get Javad out of the mission, such a stroke of brilliance
- Rose’s conversation with Catherine where she told her off for talking about her aunt and uncle because she didn’t know them
- Peter holding doors open for Rose even when they were trying to get away from gunmen
- Peter immediately crawling into bed with Rose when she was having a nightmare
- Basically ever scene with Peter and Rose
- the fight scenes, they felt incredibly realistic and used a lot of elements from around the scene
- Peter and Rose’s silent communication regarding shooting Markus, it was so awesome to see them in sync like that
- Rose’s speech to Tomăs regarding the chemical weapons, she was able to get through to him even without any type of training because she is awesome
- Peter’s immediate confidence in Rose when Catherine asked “who knew she could do that?” Fuck, that was an awesome moment
- Peter and Noor’s conversation on the steps of the UN where she understood why he did what he did and accepted his apology by holding out her hand. The number of times Peter did and tried to apologize to Noor for her brother because he wants to do the right thing
Despite how much I loved the new season, I do have a few lingering questions and complaints that I also wanted to write out in case anyone else is struggling with them:
- How did the broker know to contact Rose at the beginning of the season if Peter’s name and involvement in Camp David were scrubbed?
- that President Travers wasn’t in more episodes. I really, really appreciated the way she stood up for Peter in front of Catherine at the beginning and wish there could have been some follow through later on in the season
- it feels like Rose and the doctor could have maybe thought of knockout gas a little earlier? I understand why the show did what they did for the plot but it didn’t ring quite true that they would both make so many cannisters of KX without trying something to get out of there
- Soloman’s speech to Peter as he was taking him to meet the broker regarding the one agent of theirs Peter killed in Bangkok. How they all attended his funeral and he had 40-some people who loved him. Dude, YOU killed Peter’s partner!! That whole speech just felt off.
- the character of Catherine. Things improved towards the end of the season but I really didn’t like the character at the beginning and especially didn’t like the way she spoke about Peter. It isn’t his fault that they sent him in without a lot of training and it was her job to make sure he was ready
- Peter’s tattoos being gone. I understand why it makes sense that a spy cannot have very identifiable tattoos but come on. I think we can all agree that Gabe’s tattoos are incredibly hot and we should be able to see them
So, those are my thoughts. I’m sure I’ll have more once the dust settles from watching all the episodes in one day but for now, I hope you enjoy the new season as much as I did.
#peter sutherland#the night agent#rose larkin#sutherkin#larkland#gabriel basso#luciane buchanan#season 2#night agent
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“Yes, that one” HAHAHAHAHA something with the way he says it, like, “That idiot, I know, I should do better, but I’m in love with the prat, what can I say” 😭
I bet Merthur is the only couple embarrassed to say they are a couple just because… They’re both so stupid (said with affection)
I can relate, because sometimes I just forget words in english and I put some in my language there, and when the time comes that I need to revise, I’m like, “Ehm… What did I want to say here????” LMAO, but you can do this!
Sometime a fanfic plan is just some dialogue sprinkled with some French and many mistakes lmao I have nearly 7k of this omg (AU where Arthur come back from the dead but get it by a spell and no one can recognize him nor hear his name so Merlin doesn’t know he is talking to Arthur)
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#also congrats on the 7k#it is like that😔#BUT KEEP UP THE GOOD WORK#let’s go#merthur#arthur pendragon#merlin#merlin bbc#bbc merlin#i always imagined a fic where accidentally#post arthur come back like after ten years of him living happily with merlin and stuff#they go back in time together but because of a spell no one can see them but their closest friends and family and therefore themselves#so they wouldn’t have to hide to the kingdom but they’re acting all lovey dovey and they’re so disgusting and their past selves are like#‘the fuck happens in the future and why—WHY AM I HOLDING YOUR HAND—MERLIN! ANSWER’#you know and then merthur from the future is just trying to go back and fix shit and they’re all chill#but they don’t realise they just kissed goodbye in front of the knights and gwen and they’re like#‘oh fuck’#I DON’T KNOW I LOVE SHARING IDEAS WITH YOU ALSO#i’m seated#like you said👀🍿#i can’t wait to read it ehehehe#work in progress#fanfic#I HAVE NO IDEA WHY#my ideas always match with yours#I’M NOT MAKING THIS UP I SWEAR😭#it just happens and i don’t know why????😭#help
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Hi, im truly sorry to bother you, I apologise. But I admire your work and I have drank all of it attentively these days to escape from reality, you are truly a gem <33333. Which I don't know how to express my gratitude for it. I have been struggling my entire life to see myself worthy of gaining or receiving love, I have been insecure about my body. And after I read your fic plus size girls x jayvik I swear I cried in admiration. I just want to know if you could write a fanfic with jayvik in love with a curvy tall girl (I'm 1.78cm, I know it's not much, but I have been feeling like absolute fucking garbage lately). I truly hope all your dream come true, your pets live longer and a fucking raise. I love you, mon cherie <333 0w0
HATERS GONNA HATE - JAYVIK X READER
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synopsis: your whole life you've held insecurities, as most women do. You've always been too tall, too “large”, too much. It's weighed you down for too damn long. Your two boys make you realize your beauty, the beauty you've always had. They just took the wool off of your eyes.
warnings: negative self talk, talk of insecurities, childhood bullying, comfort, compliments, fluff, suggestiveness, pre-established relationship, Grammarly is my beta
genre: m/m/f
p.s. You're so sweet omfg 🥺🥺 I love you too!! I hope this fic comforts any and all who need it. I'm not tall (160cm/5’3) but I am thicker/curvy/fat (whatever term you want to use) like I've cried in changerooms since I hated how something looked on me/how I looked. Its peaks and valleys of self-love; and if my stories make y'all feel beautiful, I've done my part. Its also cathartic to me as well.
You've always been the odd one out. You were taller than all your classmates, you went through puberty first and got breasts before all your peers, you filled out and got curves much sooner than expected. Some may call this a blessing, to you it's a curse.
Now as an adult, you're taller than most men around you. You have a curvy figure yes, but it's not like the surgical, edited versions seen magazines and billboards.
You have nice breasts, but they're not defying gravity levels of perky, you have a smaller waist compared to your hips and shoulders, but you have rolls when you sit and twist your body, you have long legs, but they're not sculpted to perfection. You're just a woman.
A woman who hates what she sees in the mirror sometimes.
You nitpick insecurities others wouldn't even see, especially the people who love and care about you.
Jayce and Viktor think you're a goddess amongst men. That you're perfect, both inside and out. They love everything about you.
They love that you’re close in height to them, so they're not bending over to love on you (especially Viktor with his bad back), Jayce is obsessed with your hips and waist, and Viktor would like to die suffocated between your breasts.
So when they see you at your vanity after waking up and nitpicking yourself, well… that just won't do.
· · ─────── ·𖥸· ─────── · ·
Here you are, sitting at your vanity in a large t-shirt and undies, nitpicking away at yourself. Your hair is tossled from sleep, your eyes glittering as you look over yourself. Your hands drag across your face, into your hair, and over your body. Your mind repeating awful statements said about you over the years.
You're so engrossed in being mean to yourself, you don't see Viktor come up behind you and place your morning coffee onto your vanity.
“What’re you doing?” He asks his voice thick due to just waking up. His accent is heavy and heady. You feel your face heat up at his question, not expecting to be caught and the tone of his voice makes your heart flutter.
You freeze slightly, before looking at the handsome man in the mirror, “Just… looking at myself. Nothing to worry about.”
“In appreciation, I hope. Your furrowed brow and pout give you away my love. What’s on your mind?”
A sigh escapes your lungs as you grab your coffee and take a small sip, contemplating your words, “Am I— too much for you two?”
Viktor guffaws at that, his eyes wide when he looks at you, “What on earth are you talking about?”
“Y’know… too much. Too tall, too curvy, too chubby. Just— too much.”
“Who on earth put that ridiculous idea into your head?!”
A light incredulous laugh leaves you at the sight of an enraged Viktor. He looks like a mad cat.
“Society, classmates, magazines, and ads. I'm not… the picturesque standard of beauty.”
Viktor's lips narrow at your dejected tone, “You are the most beautiful women I have ever had the pleasure of seeing. You're personality is sparkling, and your physical beauty makes me question how a goddess like you could love a man like me.”
You whip around at that last statement, anger clear on your face, “A man like you? What do you mean.”
“A cripple. A poor man from the Undercity. A man who is weak, and ill, and not good enough for you.”
A snarl is what he gets in return for his statement, “Who told you that?! I’ll rip their tongue out for such disgusting comments! You’re wonderful Viktor, I wouldn’t change a damn thing about you!”
A knowing look is what you get and your anger immediately quells. Oh that sneaky, smart son of a bitch.
“So— now you know how Jayce and I feel about you. People, society in general are cruel. Our minds our biggest enemy. Jayce will agree with me.”
“Agree with you on what?” Said man asks as he enters the bedroom, a sleepy look on his face as he scratches his toned stomach and sips on his coffee, “What’s taking you two so long? We need to decide on breakfast and I’m getting hungry.”
You look away as Viktor cocks an eyebrow, “Our darling thinks she’s “too much” for us. She’s been ruthlessly nitpicking herself in the mirror.”
A loud gasp is all you hear before Jayce goes into a tangent, “Who told you that?! Give me their names and I’ll black list them from the council! What on earth are you talking about?! Too much? Too much! I’d say there’s not enough!”
“That’s cause you’re greedy sweetheart.”
“Shut up Viktor, my point still stands! You’re perfect babe. Ignore the haters, they hate because they’re miserable in their own lives and we all know the saying. Misery loves company.”
Jayce walks over to you and places his mug next to yours, his frame towering over you as he brackets your back and puts his hands on your thighs, “I’d die if you changed anything about yourself, your legs especially. Don’t take away my earmuffs. I’ll cry.”
You laugh as Viktor joins in and cups your breasts, you gasp at the feeling of his cold hands breaching underneath your shirt. “And don’t take my pillows away. I’ll be devastated and my sleep schedule will be shit again.”
The snort you let out is anything but lady-like, but they got their point across. They love you no matter what, even if they have favourite body parts of yours.
You smile at the two of them through the mirror and their eyes lock onto yours, before looking at each other; having a silent conversation.
“Y’know what… breakfast can wait. I’m hungry for something else.” Jayce states as he looks at you, his eyes big and pleading. His hands travelling up your thighs, over your undies, and he grips your exposed waist.
Viktor chuckles when he squeezes your breasts harshly and you gasp at the sensation, “I agree Jayce. What do you say my love, are you willing to indulge your two boys?”
You nod and before you know it, Jayce has tossed you onto the bed. Your coffee and breakfast completely forgotten as Jayce lowers himself in between your legs as Viktor sits behind you; his hands removing your top as he fondles your breasts and kisses your cheek and neck.
You’re their goddess, and they’ll worship you like one as well. They’ll continue to worship you until the end of time. Your devotees… How lucky you are.
Society sucks. Beauty standards suck. We’re all beautiful, expect we don’t see it. It’s time we pull the wool off of our eyes and see ourselves as we truly are. We’re perfect. No need to change anything. I hope y’all liked this, it made me feel quite a bit better. Love ya ❤️
#arcane#viktor arcane#jayce talis#arcane imagine#arcane x reader#jayce x viktor x reader#jayvik x reader#fem!reader#banners by cafekitsune
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Baby Bradshaw
Flufftober, October 19th
Sister reader x Bradley Bradshaw
Summary: You’re Bradley’s little sister whose 14 and he doesn’t exactly know about the mischief you (cause) get into until he gets called back to Top Gun as one of the candidates. Maverick hasn't seen you since you were six because of the whole pulling Bradley's papers thing. (You've been living with Ice). So, a lot has defiantly changed. Your callsign is Marvel.
A/N: I know the time lining doesn’t exactly add up, but I came up with this idea at 2am. Deal with it I think it’s cute (and hectic). Please, I know it's shitty but just bear with me for it.
Warnings: Swearing, Underage drinking (only a little), (underage) flying combat - it’s just a fanfic and I can create the rules so.....deal with it!
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
“Can I leave now?” You complained.
“For the last time, NO” Warlock answered while going through a stack of papers.
You walk over to the front of his desk, where he’s standing. “Oh, come on, you’re the one who always says that I should be in the farthest room from where you are. Just between you and me, I’m pretty sure that this is because there’s something going on downstairs that you don’t want me to know about.”
“MARVEL!” He yells, fed up with you.
“WARLOCK!” You imitate him and his stance.
“You know what? Yeah, your right I don’t think I can actually handle any more of well......you today. You can leave” He exasperated while doing a hand gesture when he said ‘you’.
Immediately you grab your phone from the tiny square table in there and sped out the door, deciding to go check out what’s happening downstairs since your brother was saying something about having to go there again today. He’s been complaining about someone - his callsign is bagman you're pretty sure - to you for the past week but won’t tell you why, so you’re deciding to investigate what's going on because, well you’ve got nothing better to do. Well, you should probably get all the science homework you have done but that's a later problem with bullying one of the navy research persons into "helping" you.
You've also asked Ice multiple times but he's found ways to distract you so you'd forget about it until the next day. (Yes, he has written a whole handbook of how to deal with your shit - you don't know of course)
While you're walking down the hall you've come into eyesight of Cyclone who was about to go into a room.
'Shit' you thought to yourself.
"What are you doing down here Marvel?" Cyclone, paused right before turning the doorknob.
"Well, my plan worked with annoying Warlock into letting me leave his office and now I'm going to figure out what you guys are failing at hiding from me just down the hall" you said pointing to a wide door into one of the hanger/classroom things as if it's a normal occurrence.
Which it kinda is...
"That's funny cause I don't remember allowing you to go anywhere near there" He crossed his arms.
"Well unlike everyone else I don't give a crap what you want or think I should do or just orders in general" You smirked and resumed your walking.
“Marvel! Stop!” He yelled.
Right as he yelled you started to sprint as fast as you could (which is FAST).
“MARVEL! GET BACK HERE. NO! DON’T YOU DARE GO IN THERE!” He started to chase after you.
The dagger squad and Maverick turned their heads to the noise coming from the hallway until the door burst open. You ran over to the other side of the room, quickly before Cyclone could get to you.
By the time Cyclone ran in you already ducked underneath an old wooden desk nobody has probably used in years considering the amount of dust it held.
Everyone looked from where you hid, over to Cyclone who’s clearly pissed.
“Marvel!” Cyclone called out, ignoring everyone’s confused faces.
You kept quiet, not making even a small amount of sound. Your legs are tucked up against your chest, tightly while you lean your chin on your left knee.
“Okay if no one else is going to say it, I am. Who the hell is Marvel? Is the little girl who ran in Marvel?” Hangman spoke out loud, earning an elbow to the ribs from Phoenix.
Cyclone looked over to everyone and sighed before yelling out, “Y/N BRADSHAW!”
At that you rolled your eyes and crawled out from under the desk, walking over.
“You know I really hate it when you call me by my full name” You glared at him, paying no mind to everyone who’s watching with shocked faces. Bradley's face though was filled with more so disappointment.
“You know what I give up, I don’t have the energy to fight with you today” Cyclone said, walking towards the doors.
“Well, that’s disappointing, I’ve got nothing better to do and it’s entertainment for me” He walked out giving you the bird.
“Wow! How real nice of you!” you said sarcastically before turning over to everyone.
You walked a bit closer to Hangman, giving him a death glare.
“Oh yeah, call me ‘little girl’ again, I’ll kick your shins until they’re raw and bleeding” You threatened him.
His reaction is a mixture of shock and against his wishes, fright. Before you could laugh at him, Rooster started walking towards you with an eyebrow raised.
“Okay, in my defense what do you expect me to do? Stay in my room and happily do fucking homework all day?!” You stated to him.
You looked over at Maverick who was walking towards you and enveloped you into a tight hug.
"I missed you kiddo."
#top gun#top gun maverick#top gun maverick fic#bradley bradshaw#bradley bradshaw x little sister reader#bradley bradshaw x sister reader#bradley bradshaw x reader#pete mitchell#maverick#pete mitchell x daughter figure reader#pete mitchell x reader#phoenix#natasha trace#jake seresin#hangman
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Ascendant Astarion Recommendations!
I'm a fan of both Spawn and Ascendant Astarion so I do enjoy reading both. But if you want to explore and read some good shit~ Ascendant fics well here you go~
I've read a lot so bear with me, These are my TOPS~
I LOVE ALL OF THESE:
A Gift, A Curse by @elemit - This updates daily most of the time, the author is getting busy IRL but it should be back on a daily update again soon I think. This is one of the darker theme of Ascendant Astarion "50 shades of 'FCKNG LITTLE TWAT' Ancunin" as one of the comment says haha some scenes are "traumatic" but the rollercoaster ride of emotions you'll get on this story is one for the books! ONGOING!
Fangs and Fractured Hearts - by @fangsandfracturedhearts - This one's one of the softer sides of the Ascendant, the dynamic of Tav and Astarion here is exquisite! The cliffhanger on this one just uggghhhhh. i love it!! ONGOING!
Hellish Rebuke by @bludazey this one's a classic! the details on this story is so genius I swear. Also I think a lot of Astarion fanfic writers got inspired with the Devil's dealing here. Also Tav here is effing smart and just chef's kiss! such a great heroine! ONGOING!
His Star - His Queen [Originally titled Across Stars and Time] by ARandomIntrovert - Now this a bit different, What if multiverse exists? Now there's two Astarions fighting over you, Spawn VS Ascendant, where do you think this would go? :)) Story's definitely amazing and unique! I easily got invested. haha ONGOING!
In Another Life by @locallegume - Definitely a softer side of the Ascendant but Tav and Astarion's dynamic here is one of my fave! <3 Tav here is not the overly good role model we usually read, she's troubled too and definitely has effed up issues. but sometimes you just need to find your own freak and be together forever. ONGOING!
Pieces Still Stuck In Your Teeth - by @howlsmovinglibrary / @wetcatspellcaster - The amount of Banter and D&D Lore on this one is superb! you have to watch out for the writer's notes! I love how I get to learn more D&D stuff and godssss how many times I almost got so swayed by the Ascendant here! good thing Tav's so good at bantering haha ONGOING!
Remember ye not the former things by @brabblesblog - THE SEQUEL!! It focuses more on the aftermath and them working out their relationship, a lot more TAV bg story but gods, Astarion here , I just want to smother him with cuddles and kisses, TAKE MEEEEE ONGOING!
Whither is thy beloved gone? by @brabblesblog -
It has a sequel!!! - that's how good it is! <3 also The Ascendant here is my favorite! The confrontations are just so real and so true I caaaaan't. He wrote the Ascendant so good I actually sided with him more than Tav! A lot of smut ngl but I got into the characters more that I should have. you're missing out if you haven't read this. COMPLETED!
Most of these are still ongoing but I am updated w/ each, along with other Spawn Astarion fics :)) They are all good! some more soft than the others, some darker and evil :))
Let me know if you guys want to get some Spawn Astarion fics recommendations!
#my day starts and ends with me just reading Astarion fanfics tbh#my life is just him now#I live for these now tbh coz larian isn't going to add more!!!#astarion#bg3#bg3 astarion#astarion ancunin#baldur's gate 3#baldurs gate 3#astarion x reader#astarion x tav#astarion fic#just me rambling#ascended astarion x tav#ascended astarion
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hello :) I have fanfic idea. So how about reader comes over to Rhea’s house and it’s snowing so reader has to stay longer because of the snow storm but Rhea pulls out the game dunk desires (a spicy card game) and things get heated ;) (PLZ SMUT AND FLUFF ENDING🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾🙏🏾) anyways bye bye 👋
Locked In.
Rhea Ripley x Fem!Reader
WARNINGS: 18+ SMUT, Thigh Riding, Spanking, Strap-On Riding, Strapwarming, Slight Manipulation??? WORD COUNT: 2,773 A/N: literally started working on this the second i saw this. loved this prompt
“Hello hello! I’m here!” You called out as you let yourself into your friend Rhea’s home. “You better not be robbing me, I have a knife!” Rhea joked from the kitchen.
You approached the woman finishing cutting up a watermelon. “You need to learn how to lock your door Rhe-Rhe.” Rhea set her knife down and turned to face your direction, flexing her arms. “Have you seen these guns? No one could stand a chance,” she said before putting the chopped up fruit in a bowl. “Also I left it unlocked for you, it’s fucking freezing out there. I didn't wanna make you wait in the cold.”
“What a gentleman,” You teased as you patted her back. The both of you made your way into the living room before plopping yourselves into the couch. “I swear people completely forget how to drive the second they see a couple of snowflakes.” You grumbled while a chuckle came from Rhea.
The two of you had spent the past few months spending bits of your free time together growing your friendship closer. But the past few weeks Rhea had been begging you to come to her place nearly everyday. She also became more possessive over you, you noticed how jealous she got two nights ago when you went out with your group of friends. Rhea only talked to you the entire night and would tense up whenever you spoke to anyone other than her.
“Now why was I dragged to your humble abode today?” You questioned as the snow fell outside the large window several feet behind you. Rhea gave you a big cheesy smile before saying “Board games!”
You groaned “Will you ever get bored of forcing me to play your old people games everyday?” You complained to the woman. “You know you love it,” Rhea claimed before adding on “I just want to finish one last episode of my show.” As Rhea began watching her show, you stared at the dark twilight outside.
Both of you were soon disrupted by a weather alert blurting from the TV. You turned away from the window and looked over at Rhea whose eyes were glued to the TV screen, then turned your attention to the weather alert reading “Winter Storm – Blizzard Warning: In Effect 6 PM Through 11 AM – No Travel Advised.”
“Shit,” You mumbled looking at your watch. 5:28 PM. “I should get out of here before the roads get too fucked.” You said as you stood up. Rhea quickly grabbed your hand “No stay, I don’t want you driving out there. The roads are probably slippery already, I’d feel awful if I made you go home in this weather.” She coaxed.
“I’ll be okay Rhea, I really don’t wanna be a burden.” You said looking down at her. “I want you to stay.” Rhea stated, grabbing your other hand. The pair of you studied each other's faces before you nodded “If you insist…” You mumbled while the woman smiled and let go of your hands.
As the last few minutes of Rhea’s show played she made her way to the kitchen and grabbed a handful of beer bottles to place on the coffee table. “If we're gonna be stuck here we gotta at least get buzzed.” Rhea voiced as she made her way to her closet which housed all her games.
You sat on the floor in front of the sofa as Rhea brought back an assortment of Monopoly, Skip-bo, and Connect 4.
“You ready to get your ass beat?” Rhea taunted, causing you to roll your eyes. “In your dreams, Ripley.” You bantered. Rhea winked at you before taking a swig of her beer.
The woman had beat you in both Monopoly and Skip-Bo. “I need some damn wine.” You grumbled as you stood up.
You poured two glasses of the first red wine you noticed then brought them out to the living room. “Thank you, beautiful.” Rhea smirked, her compliment catching you by surprise leading your cheeks to flush.
“You’re cheating!” Rhea accused after multiple rounds of her losing to you in Connect 4. You made a sarcastic angry expression “It’s Connect 4 how would I cheat!?” You snickered out. “It’s gotta be rigged!” She swore. “Rhe-Rhe it’s a piece of plastic I promise it's not rigged, also it’s not my fault I’m always two steps ahead of you.” You said playfully patting her thigh.
“Not always,” Rhea muttered under her breath. You shot her a confused look, “Hm?” You hummed out. “Ah nothin’ you go pick the next game.”
Rhea scootched back onto the sofa as she watched you make your way to the closet. Your eyebrows furrowed in confusion once you spotted a sealed box. You walked back to Rhea, sitting down next to her holding the box she bought just hours before you came over.
It was a card game that you never heard of, ‘Drunk Desires’ was labeled on the plain black box. “I have literally never heard of this…” You commented, Rhea gave you a look of disbelief before voicing a simple “Seriously?”
“What is it? Teach me how to play!” You urged, assuming it was a game comparable to Cards Against Humanity. “Oh I’ll teach you how to play,” She purred out as she opened the box. “All you have to do is draw a card and do what it tells you, if you don’t you have to take a drink…but only draw the white cards first.” Rhea instructed, scooting closer to you.
The game seemed simple enough so you took a hold of the white card on top of the deck.
“Tell your game partner what you adore most about them.” You read out, you looked at Rhea smiling. “Ummm, I like your constant attitude…and big strong muscles.” You giggled out. “Oh yeah?” Rhea took a loose grip of your upper arm, her thumb running up and down your skin caused your hairs to stick up.
Rhea used her free hand to pick up a card that read ‘Tell your game partner a dirty secret.’ “I think my little secret will remain a secret until later,” She grinned.
“Now tell me why I can’t know now?” You pushed.
“I'll tell you later…I promise” Rhea offered. “Hmm, you gotta drink and tell me later.” You persuaded her, she shrugged before taking a sip of her wine.
You both took turns pulling seemingly simple yet flirty cards, you both had answered nearly every question. The drinks you both previously consumed had obviously built onto the tension the two of you had building over the past few months.
Rhea’s hand slid onto your thigh as she urged you to grab a black card. “Have a three minute kissing contest, the winner drinks.” You stuttered looking over at Rhea, the both of you staring into each other's eyes. Your breath hitched slightly, you weren't expecting the game to take a twist down this road. “I-I’m sorry, you can take a drink if you don't want to, no need to worry.” Rhea assured you.
“No, I want to.” You confessed quietly as you slowly straddled the buff woman. Rhea grinned, “You have no idea how fucked up I am over you,” Rhea whispered as you rested your forehead against hers.
“Fuck, what type of game have you gotten me into…” You muttered, your hands gripping on Rhea’s shoulders. Lust had taken control of the both of you. You weren't sure who dived into the other first, but the one thing you were sure about is how intoxicating that first taste of your closest friend was.
Messy kisses worked to sync together while Rhea’s hands explored your hips. Both of your tongues mashed together while light groans escaped the back of your throat when Rhea began grinding your hips against her lap. Your hands found their way tangled into Rhea’s hair as her tongue investigated your mouth.
Rhea’s lips traveled down from your jawline to your neck, her teeth bit down on your sensitive skin before pulling away licking her lips. You could tell Rhea had been waiting ages for this. “I think we both deserve a drink for that.” Rhea murmured after prying herself off of you.
Once you had both set your glasses down you reached over to grab Rhea a card. Rhea bit down on her lip before reading “Both you and your partner must remove a clothing item of the other's choice.” She paused for a moment, “Let’s get you out of those pants, pretty girl.” You obeyed and stood up from her lap, you let Rhea pull the waistband down and off your legs. Her hands caressing your legs for a few moments as she admired you.
You eagerly pulled the woman's shirt off before tossing it onto the opposite end of the sofa. “We have all night sweetheart, what are you in such a hurry for hm?” Rhea teased.
You bent over, grabbing your second black card that read ‘Go into another room and send a naughty selfie to your partner.” Protecting the card in your hand you let the woman know that you’ll be right back before hurrying off to her bathroom.
Once locked in the bathroom you slipped your hoodie and shirt off. You leaned against the wall posing and snapped a photo of your body in the mirror before sending it to Rhea. You added a text simply stating “Missing you in here. :(“
You knew your message had been seen when you heard a yell from the other room, “Get your ass back in here!” Rhea demanded. You decided to stay inside the bathroom, curious as to how she’d take it. “I know you heard me, I don’t like waiting.” The woman's voice approached.
Rhea had pulled her next card and slid it under the door. ‘Take your partner’s underwear off without using hands.’ was displayed. “You got two options, sweetheart. You could come out now and have some fun with me or you can stay in there and I’ll go to bed without you.” She threatened.
You reluctantly opened the door, Rhea caught you by surprise as she threw you over her shoulder. “Good choice.” She mumbled out.
“Now be a good girl for me and you’ll get what you need.” The woman warned you as she laid you back into the sofa. “I’ll be the best girl for you.” You promised as she kneeled in between your legs. Her lips smirked while kissing on your inner thighs, a thread of whimpers escaped from your throat. She began to bite and pull at your panties, using her hands to keep your legs open for her. As your panties fell to your ankles, Rhea’s finger struck a single swipe up your folds, causing you to yelp out. “Such a sweet girl…” Rhea stated, licking her finger.
A new card was handed to you as Rhea sat down. You flipped the card around to show the woman. ‘Grind on your partner's thigh for two minutes.’ It read. Rhea spread her legs apart as you settled yourself onto her left leg. ”Atta girl” She hummed. A moaned “Shit Rhea'' left your mouth once your bare core began rocking against the fabric of the woman’s jeans. The two of you connected your lips as you whimpered into Rhea’s mouth, her hands traveling around your back.
Rhea’s hands got to work unclasping your bra, sliding it down your shoulders, and discarding it.
“Such a wet girl for me,” Rhea pulled away from your lips as she muttered while your sweetness leaked through her jeans.
You both knew you were past the point of no return. You needed each other…and you needed each other fast.
You whimpered as Rhea pulled you up off her leg. “Shh, give me one second and I promise I’ll make you feel so good.” She reassured you while tugging off her jeans to reveal she had been packing the whole night. Rhea knew tonight was gonna be the night you finally screamed her name.
“Come sit on my cock baby.” Rhea murmured, helping you align your hips with hers. Your head fell back as you began sinking onto her. A whispered “Rhea,” came from your mouth as you settled at the bottom of her strap. You slowly rocked your hips back and forth as you let your walls adjust to her size.
As you began slowly bouncing up and down her you threw your head into Rhea’s shoulder. Your hands clinged to the woman’s biceps. “So big…Rhea” You whined out, your nails digging into Rhea’s skin.
“Fuck!” Rhea groaned under her breath. “Taking me like such a good girl.” She complimented while her hands guided your hips to bounce faster. Your hands lifted Rhea’s bra off her chest. Whimpers filled the room while your hips traveled up and down Rhea’s length.
“That’s it…so good.” Rhea quietly reassured you. She did not expect how sensitive you’d be, the smallest movements leaving you overwhelmed.
Tears formed in your eyes as Rhea’s hands held you down, forcing you to rock your hips against her. You moaned against the woman’s shoulder, your clit rubbing against the leather of her strap-on. “Feels so good doesn't it baby,” Rhea comforted.
Your teeth clamped down on her shoulder once her hands guided you to bounce on her length again. “I know princess,” was said before a kiss was planted on your forehead. “You’re doing so good for me.” Was whispered in your ear. A loud yelp came from you as Rhea’s hands striked down on your ass.
Rhea’s hands tightly gripped your ass leading your hips to rock forward and backward as you bounced on her. You rested your head against Rhea’s cheek, tears escaping your eyes. Your walls tightened around her as your cries turned to screams. “I need you to cum all over me baby.” Rhea urged you.
“Rhea!! Fuck!” You screeched as your orgasm peaked. “God!” You yelped. Rhea helped stabilize you once your legs began shaking eventually she let you sink onto her length after your legs gave out.
Rhea’s hands brought your face to match hers, planting a long kiss on your lips while your final tears fell from your eyes. “You were perfect.” She praised, wiping your tears. She let you move your head to rest on her shoulder as you let out a pitiful whimper. “Shhh…it's all okay baby.” She quieted her voice, her fingers tracing in your hair.
The woman let you rest on her as you occasionally delivered weak kisses to her neck. “I got you darling…you have no idea how long I've been waiting to hold you.” She whispered, wrapping her arms around you. After letting you rest a while she lifted your hips off her length, shushing you as you whined. She slipped off her strap before lifting you off the sofa. “We gotta get you in the bath, pretty girl.”
Your back laid against Rhea’s chest while you bathed together whispering sweet nothings. “Hey…what was that secret you were gonna tell me earlier?” Your question broke the comfortable silence.
Rhea laughed before admitting “That wasn’t a real weather alert earlier.”
“What's that supposed to mean?” She had confused you.
“It’s some year old year old recording I found. I've been keeping an eye on the forecast and chose today as the perfect day. All I had to do was make sure it was playing before you got here.” Rhea grinned whilst coating your hair with conditioner.
You scoffed out. “And you think all that was easier than asking me on a date?” You teasingly asked. “Where’s the fun in all that?” Rhea quipped.
“You bought that game just for tonight, didn’t you?!” You interrogated Rhea. Her silence told you everything you needed to know. “You bought that game cause you were scared to make a move huh.” You accused.
“Woah hold on!” Rhea protested, “I was not scared, I just wanted to try something new.” She tried deflecting.
“You’re not fooling me Ripley, you’re a major softie. All clingy and jealous!” You teased. “I am not clingy at all!” Rhea fussed.
“Rhea, we are in the same tub and you are clinging onto me for dear life, what’s your excuse for that, hm?” Rhea tightened her grip on you more “I’m keeping you warm of course!” She chuckled.
You were absolutely right, Rhea was so infatuated with you she wouldn’t let you out of her sight until she had to go back to work a week and a half later. She went as far as trying to beg for you to be able to travel with her. Now that Rhea got to hold you, she never planned on letting go.
#rhea ripley angst#rhea ripley fanfic#rhea ripley oneshot#rhea ripley x reader#rhea ripley x you#rhea ripley smut#wwe smut
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