#i am a BABY!!! only 19!!!!
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wolfes · 2 years ago
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DAWG WHY IS LEONARDO DICAPRIO'S GF MY AGE THE FUCK
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britneyshakespeare · 6 months ago
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I have to be so honest and vulnerable with you for a second. I keep thinking of getting another complete works of Shakespeare
#tales from diana#my riverside 1973 is still my beloved baby but she's really worse for the wear these days#i didn't start thinking about it till i got one for my friend like 6 months ago for his bday#and i kept looking at it and being like oh wow. his doesn't have all the scratches and rips mine does#mine is still BETTER obviously bc it's MINE. it's in worse condition objectively but it's MINE#making it the best copy in existence. to me#and it was my aunt's textbook at boston college. my grandmother let me have it. i think of it as a family heirloom#and the coating on the front cover side of the spine has been slowly tearing off :(#like there's one long vulnerable rip almost all the way down. idk how to prevent it from breaking further#other than just by not using it. and idk how to fix it wo making it potentially worse#i didn't know how to take care of old gigantic books when i got it at 19. i never considered it#i hadn't had one before. but now im more experienced#and im also just curious about what's inside other editions. especially newer ones#i only have 6 plays and at least 3 of them i plan to read in a copy other than the riverside#like my 23 plays and sonnets (1953) edited by t. m. parrot has 2 and another play im gonna borrow from library lending#and id definitely wanna get rid of a lottttt of books i have right now before getting a new one#im already planning on which books to donate when i declutter#and i need to declutter my books DESPERATELY. so so desperately#it'd just be nice to have another complete works in my collection. for a number of reasons.#that way i also suppose ill have two big books of shakespeare for auntie diana to pass down someday#i don't plan on getting one soon im just in the contemplative phase. but boy am i tempted
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inkykeiji · 8 months ago
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🥳🎉HAPPY BIRTHDAY SAM RIVERS🎉🥳
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bubblegum-snowdrop · 1 year ago
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office jobs have you beefing with somebody's grandma like it's normal. like kathy belongs in a memory care facility she can't talk to me like that
IS THIS HOW NORMAL OFFICE JOBS GO VHCHDSCHVCDSHVBSDHVDHVJHJSVHJSVHBVHSVHBSHVHBHCHVHBVDFBHJVDBHJ
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thethief1996 · 1 year ago
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Israel has cut water, electricity and food to Palestinians in Gaza. They are buying 10.000 M16 rifles and plan to distribute to civilian settlers in the West Bank to hunt down Palestinians. They're bombing the only way out of Gaza through Egypt, after telling refugees to flee through it, and have threatened the Egyptian government in case they let aid trucks pass through. Entire families, generations, are being wiped out and left to wander the streets hoping they don't get bombed.
Palestinians are using their last minutes of battery to let the world know about their genocide and are being met with a wall of "What about Hamas? What about the beheaded babies? Killing children on either side is bad!" even though the propaganda claims have been debunked over and over again. How cruel is it to ask somebody to condemn themselves before their last words? Or before grieving the loss of their entire families? When there's no such disclaimer to Israelis even though their government has shown over and over genocidal intent? Like who are you even trying to appease? What will your wishy washy statement do against decades of zionist thought infiltrating evangelical and Jewish stablishmemts?
Take action. Israel will fall back if public opinion turns its tide. The UK fell back on its bloody decision to cut aid to Palestine under public scrutiny. The USAmerican empire spends $3.8 billion dollars annually solely on this proxy war while its people suffer under a progressively military regime as well. News outlets are canceling last minute on Palestinian speakers while letting Israelis tell lies unchecked. Palestinian refugees are being targeted in ICE establishments and mosques are already being hounded by the FBI. France and Germany have banned pro-Palestine protests, while Netherlands and the UK have placed restrictions . You have the chance to stop this from turning into repeat of the Iraq war.
I want to do something but there's hardly anything for me to do from Brasil besides spreading the word and not letting these testimonies fall on deaf ears. I'm asking you to do this same ant work from wherever you are.
Follow:
Eye On Palestine (instagram / twitter)
Mohammed El-Kurd (instagram / twitter)
Decolonize Palestine (website with a chronological explanation of the occupation and debunking myths)
Muhammad Shehada (twitter)
Plestia Alaqad (directly from Gaza. Many of her videos are interrupted by bombs)
If there's a protest in your city, please attend. Here's an international calendar of events:
Friday, October 13
ALBUQUERQUE, NM (US) – Fri Oct. 13, 3 pm, UNM Bookstore, University of New Mexico. Organized by Southwest Coalition for Palestine.
BERKELEY, CALIFORNIA (US) – Fri Oct 13, 6 pm, Sproul Hall (Vigil), University of California Berkeley. Organized by Bears for Palestine.
DOUAIS, FRANCE – Fri Oct 13, 6:30 pm, Place de’Armes.
GOTHENBURG, SWEDEN – Fri Oct 13, 5:30 pm, Brunnsparken. Organized by Palestinska samordningsgruppen Gothenburg.
GREENSBORO, NC (US) – Fri Oct. 13, 4 pm, Wendover Village, 4203 W Wendover Ave, Greensboro, NC. Organized by Muslims for a Better NC.
LONDON, ENGLAND – Fri Oct 13, 5 pm, Keir Starmer’s Office, Crowndale Center, 218 Eversholt St, London. Organized by IJAN UK.
MEANJIN/BRISBANE, AUSTRALIA – Fri Oct 13, 6 pm, King George Square.
MIAMI, FL (US) – Fri Oct 13, 4:30 pm, Bayfront Park. Organized by Troika Kollectiv.
NAPOLI, ITALY – Fri Oct 13, 4:30 pm, Piazza Garibaldi, Napoli. Organized by GPI and Centro Culturale Handala Ali.
NGUNNAWAL/CANBERRA, AUSTRALIA – Fri Oct 13, 5:30 pm, Carema Place.
PERTH/BOORLOO, AUSTRALIA – Fri Oct. 13, 5:30 pm, Murray Street Hall, Boorloo/Perth. Organized by Friends of Palestine WA.
PORTLAND, OREGON (US) – Fri Oct 13, 3 pm, 1200-1220 SW 5th Ave, Portland.
PORT RICHEY, FL (US) – Fri Oct 13, 7:30 am, Route 19 and Ridge Road, Port Richey. Sponsored by: Florida Peace Action Network; Partners for Palestine; CADSI
PRETORIA, SOUTH AFRICA – Friday, Oct. 13, 7 pm, UP Main Campus, DSA Building opposite Thuto. Organized by PSC UP.
WITSWATERSRAND UNIVERSITY (SOUTH AFRICA) – Fri Oct 13, 1 pm, Great Hall Piazza, Flag demonstration. Organized by Wits PSC.
Saturday, October 14
ABERDEEN, SCOTLAND – Sat, Oct. 14, 2 pm, St. Nichlas Square. Organized by Scottish PSC.
AUCKLAND, NEW ZEALAND – Sat Oct 14, 2 pm, Aotea Square, Queens St, 291-2997 Queen St. Organized by PSN Aotearoa.
DETROIT/DEARBORN, MICHIGAN (US) – Sat Oct 14, 2 pm, Ford Woods Park, 5700 Greenfield Road. Organized by SAFE, PYM, SJP, Handala Coalition, more.
DUNDEE, SCOTLAND – Sat, Oct. 14, 2 pm, Place TBA. Organized by Scottish PSC.
EDINBURGH, SCOTLAND – Sat, Oct 14, 2 pm, Princes Street at Foot of the Mound. Organized by Scottish PSC.
FRANKFURT, GERMANY – Sat Oct 14, 3 pm Hauptwache, Frankfurt am Main. Sponsored by Palestina eV, Migrantifa Rhein-Main and more.
GLASGOW, SCOTLAND – Sat. Oct 14, 2 pm, Buchanan Steps. Organized by Scottish PSC.
HOUSTON, TEXAS (US) – Sat Oct 14, 2 pm, City Hall, 901 Bagby St. Organizd by PYM, PAC, USPCN, SJP and more.
LIVERPOOL, ENGLAND – Sat Oc 14, 12 pm, Church St. Organized by FRFI.
LONDON, ENGLAND – Sat Oct 14, 12 pm, BBC Portland Place, London. Organized by a broad coalition.
MILANO, ITALY – Sat. Oct 14, 3:30 pm, Piazza San Babila. Organized by Young Palestinians of Italy, UDAP, Palestinian Community, Association of Palestinians.
ORLANDO, FLORIDA – Sat Oct 14, 3 pm, Lake Eola at Robinson and Eola, Orland. Organized by Florida Palestine Network.
TORINO, ITALY – Sat. Oct. 14, 3 pm, Piazza Crispi. Organized by Progetto Palestina.
VALPARAISO, CHILE – Sat Oct 14, 6 pm, Plaza Victoria, Valparaiso. Organized by Comite Chileno de Solidaridad con Palestina.
WASHINGTON, DC (US) – Sat Oct 14, 1 pm, Lafayette Square. Organized by AMP.
Sunday, October 15
AMSTERDAM, NETHERLANDS – Sun Oct 15, 2 pm, March from Dam Square to Jonas Daniel Meijer plein.
NAARM/MELBOURNE, AUSTRALIA – Sun Oct 15, State Library Victoria.
TARDANYA/ADELAIDE, AUSTRALIA – Sun Oct 15, 2 pm, Parliament House.
AUSTIN, TEXAS (US) – Sun Oct 15, 3 pm, Texas Capitol. Organized by PSC ATX.
GADIGAL/SYDNEY, AUSTRALIA – Sun Oct 15, 1 pm, Sydney Town Hall.
SANTIAGO, CHILE -Sun Oct 15, 11 am, Plaza Dignidad, Santiago. Organized by Comite Chileno de Solidaridad con Palestina.
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grondds-and-roses · 1 year ago
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Yesterday I was studying orthodontics and discovered for the first time that I have an overbite and I can’t stop thinking about it 🥴
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kitorin · 9 months ago
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g.satoru - 1:19 am
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"i can't believe you kissed him—"
it's the dead of night when gojo satoru's fuming, acting as a means of prevention to your long awaited (and well deserved) sleep.
you pull your shared blanket, covering the entirety of yourself. "shut up. not now."
satoru rips the blanket off you. "yes, now. don't try to run away from the consequences to your actions."
an effort to pull back the blanket becomes futile, as you decide not to bother. "you're overreacting."
"why him, why not me? majority of his face is forehead and he's built like a rugby ball. he doesn't even look like a man" he inhales sharply. "what about this face isn't perfect?" satoru gestures to it, hair still slightly damp from the late shower and blindfold nowhere to be seen. "this is basically cheating. why would you do this to me? shall i get rid of my bangs so i have a bigger forehead?"
"satoru, he's just a plushie." you pull the white softness of the cinnamoroll plush to your chest, fingers stroking it's fluff.
"lucky bastard..." a curse or two accompanies his words, as he wraps himself in the blanket, as far away from you as possible. "should've been me."
"satoru—"
"i bet my hair's softer."
"why don't you come here and prove that to me then?"
the blanket unfolds to reveal a pouting gojo satoru. "you even called it a he."
cinnamoroll settles on your bed's head rest, somehow balancing with his 'majority forehead face'. satoru shuffles closer to you, closing the distance between you two.
you shrug. "he's my son. my baby."
"i'm your baby."
"he's baby in the sense of an actual, cute baby. you're baby in the sense of an immature grown ass man."
he responds with an eye roll. "wow. okay. plushie's more important than me i see."
another shrug from you, biting down on your lip to swallow a snicker (it wasn't successful).
"love it's just a plushie—"
"i tried to tell you that initially." satoru faces you to pout, but it has no effect on this little squabble of yours, maybe only a giggle or two from you. "he's so cute, c'mon.
without much effort, satoru picks cinnamoroll up, staring, no, glaring at the poor dog. "you can't find someone cute after they stole your lover."
"he's my son. that would make him your son." the observation makes him stick his tongue out. "all i did was kiss him."
"me related to him? no thank you." satoru continues to inspect the plushie from the sky blue, plastic eyes to the swirly tail on its bottom. "i hate him."
"you look the same. white hair, blue eyes."
satoru scoffs, very pretentiously. "that shade of blue is so dull. mine's bright and shiny. therefore prettier."
you lean in closer, not to whisper to him but to the plush. "i guess you'll be fine with having satoru's good night kiss?"
his jaw drops—literally, betrayal scrawled on his features. "you wouldn't."
"learn to get along with our son then."
satoru huffs indignantly, but brings the plushie to his chest, hugging it tightly. "well he's nice to cuddle. and his big head doesn't look so bad anymore."
finally, you reclaim the blanket stolen from you. "we both know you love him as much as i do."
"ew, as if." but he knows very well you're correct.
[he ended up forgetting the goodnight kiss he was fuming about]
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taglist (send ask to be added) : @yuzurins , @pokkomi , @chigirizzz
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© kitorin : do not repost, plagiarize, change, or translate
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disneyprincemuke · 8 months ago
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ღ this barbie has a baby
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"wait a second," max blinks, hands in the air to stop the conversation from going any further than it could. the rest of the guys quiet down and slowly turn to him. "are we just going to glaze over the fact that she said she's bringing a baby to the paddocks tomorrow?"
lando furrows his eyebrows. "surely, she's not talking about an actual baby, right?" he looks around for approval. "i just assumed she was talking about a... partner... boyfriend, perhaps?"
mick shrugs, "i always just assumed she was talking about a grown person. she wouldn't bring an infant to the track."
"is no one even concerned that she's only turning 19 this year and you lot assume that she's got a baby?" alex asks, scowling at his friends as he scratches his head. "maybe she knows someone named baby?"
"she calls them 'my baby', though," mick points out as he presses his lips together. "it has to be a person, right?"
"who's betting what?" charles raises his eyebrows. "i think it's neither a partner nor an infant. a car she named baby, maybe."
max furrows his eyebrows, throwing charles a questioning stare. charles just shrugs before looking around the group to get their opinions as well.
"okay, i bet dinner that it's just a friend," alex says. "you're all going to be eating your shit when tomorrow comes."
lando shakes his head. "i still think it's a boyfriend."
"what if it's a girlfriend?"
"fine," lando scoffs, clenching his jaw as he glares at charles from the corner of his eyes, "then i think it's a partner. happy?"
mick scrunches his nose. "i am not participating in a bet about my teammate! and i've seen her car before – it's definitely not called baby."
"don't be such a party pooper," max frowns. "come on, mick, you have to have made some assumption about who or what this baby is. i still think it's an infant."
"she's 18!"
"potato, potato," max waves their concerns off. "so this is all for dinner, right? bet?"
"yeah, bet."
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"mick!" she throws her arm into the air at the sight of the german entering the paddocks, waving him to approach her. "come here! i want you to meet baby!"
mick perks up, eyebrows shooting up that he's coincidentally the first face she's seen as their day starts. she's in the middle of a crowd, hands held out ahead of her as he approaches. as the crowd dissipates, he realises that she's got a stroller parked in front of her.
could it actually be an infant? oh, god, suddenly he's very concerned for her as a person in general. how could this have happened?
"this is baby!" she grins, unzipping its cover to reveal two ears and a brown sweater. "my cat!"
his blue eyes jump between the cat and the girl with a pink bow in her hair, unsure what to do with the revelation that baby is a cat. so who exactly is buying dinner tonight? "your cat? baby is a cat?"
"yes!" she beams, reaching down to scratch the feline's chin, who purrs and closes her eyes at the affection. "my dad got me baby two years ago when i finished in the top 10."
"wait," mick looks down at baby again, "is she wearing a louis vuitton sweater?"
"well, she's a sphynx," she frowns, fixing the sweater and pulling it down a little, "she gets cold sometimes." then she takes a step back with a grin, hands held out as she spins around. "and look! we match!"
"why are you spinning– oh, what's this?" lando grins, noticing the way they were conversing before he even passed through the gantry. "oh! what is that?"
"her cat," mick says through gritted teeth, eyes widening and hitting lando softly on the arm to urge him to just keep his opinions to himself. "baby. that's barbie's cat – baby."
"you named your c-" lando scowls softly, dropping his head low as the girl stops spinning. he turns to mick to hide his face away and blinks. "that's not a cat, mate. that's raw chicken."
mick simply shrugs in response. “i know.”
“she’s a sphynx! isn’t she cute?” the girl giggles, tapping lando on the shoulder. “and we’re matching clothes.”
lando stares at her. “this is baby… a cat? not even a person? not even an actual infant?”
she blinks at him. “infant? i’m 18.”
“what are you guys doing obstructing the paddock entrance and wh– hey, what’s this?” alex approaches with his hands grabbing the straps of his backpack.
“it’s baby,” lando grins, blinking hard at his friend. “a cat.”
“oh, how love– oh,” alex cuts himself off as he hunched over and looks into the carrier. he looks at lando and mick. “i imagined a more fluffy cat.”
“is that raw chicken wearing an lv sweater?” max pops up between mick and lando, furrowing his eyebrows.
“raw– she’s a cat,” she says again, pointing at baby with vindiction. “do you need to start wearing glasses?”
max grins with a small nod. he turns slightly to the men next to her. “why does her cat look something i’d find in the poultry section of the grocery store?”
“probably because it is part of the poultry section of the grocery store,” alex mutters, maintaining his grin to appease the young girl standing in front of them.
“oh, what a lovely looking cat!” charles beams, towering over the stroller wide eyed. “can i pet her?”
“yes! this is baby!” she shrieks excitedly, grabbing charles’s shoulder. she holds her arms out. “look — we’re matching clothes!”
charles’s eyes widen along with his smile. “oh! you have to get me some so i can match with you guys one day!”
“fun’s over,” max grumbles under his breath, waving his hands in the air to dismiss themselves. “i’ll see you and your chicken later.”
she furrows her eyebrows. “she’s a cat!”
— bonus
"a chicken?" oscar blinks, scowling slightly at the older men standing before him. "she has a pet chicken?"
"sphynx cat," mick points out with a tired sigh and a roll of his eyes. he turns to max, "you can't keep calling baby a chicken. you'll upset barbie."
max throws his hands in the air. "you should have seen baby! that's not a cat!"
logan tilts his head, eyebrows furrowed. "what's a sphynx cat?" he shrugs when he receives stares from them. "i'm not a cat person."
"those hairless cats," oscar explains. "have you got a picture of this said pet chicken?"
"pet chicken?" fernando had been walking by when he suddenly overhears something of a pet chicken which, in theory, is already such an absurd situation. he just has to know what is going on. "who has a pet chicken?"
"barbie."
he takes a step back. "that's some next-level rich people behaviour. not even lance owns a chicken?"
"sphynx cat," mick corrects again, looking around to ensure that she's not around to hear the guys making fun of her choice of best friend in the form of a pet. "it doesn't even look like a raw chicken, mate, it's a grey cat."
oscar grins. "so raw chicken that's expired?"
"a sphynx cat!" fernando cheers with a soft clap. "how nice! but isn't that a bit..."
"could be worse, really," mick mutters. "she told me earlier she originally wanted a tiger."
"really? what pulled her away from wanting a tiger?" logan asks.
mick sighs. "she read up that it's not very conducive for wild animals to be domesticated. she does, however, contribute tons of money to wildlife charities monthly."
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taglist: @33-81 @darleneslane @namgification @happy-nico @nikfigueiredo @localwhoore @angsthology @renarots @elliegrey2803 @cha-hot @cosmoscoffeee @fanficweasley @sugarhoneylemons @aquangxl @omgsuperstarg @strawberryubin @lovecarsgoingvroom @mangotaitai @cherry-piee @ladyladybuggg @lethalvenus @gentlyweeps-world @spilled-coffee-cup @charizznorizz @wcnorris @storminacloud @minkyungseokie @viennakarma @leilanixx @daniellef89x @fezlvr @lavisenri @xcharlottemikaelsonx @ultraviolencesam @selsbackyard @ilove-tswizzle @riddle-me-im-sirius @kindestofkings
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clockwayswrites · 2 months ago
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City Pigeons Bleed Green Part 19
(I know I'm tech on a break this week, but I could use the serotonin.) masterpost
“He understands that I am coming over?” Damian asked as he inspected his pencil case to make sure he had everything he needed. Father would be picking him up from art class to fetch lunch.
“Yep, Danny knows we’re bringing lunch over,” Grayson answered. His thumb swiped idly across his phone.
Damian took a slow breath in through his nose and out through his mouth. He loved Grayson, but it did not mean that the other was not an idiot sometimes. Sometimes family meant loving someone even though they were an idiot, Damian reminded himself.
In an attempt to start again, Damian stayed silent until he was sure that he had all of his supplies in his messenger bag. “I meant, does Danny understand that it is specifically me bringing the food? Does Danny understand who I am?”
“Oh, Dami baby, yeah,” Grayson said, voice softening in a way that made Damian bristle. At least Grayson finally set his phone down. “Jay talked to him about it and is still there at the apartment with Danny now. I’ll over over to give Jason a break and be there when you and Bruce come. Do you want me to double check with Danny before you arrive?”
Damian frowned as he adjusted the strap on his bag.
“Yes,” Damian answered after a pause and when he could meet Grayson’s eyes confidently. “I believe that the redundancy would not go amiss.”
“Okay, yeah, I’ll be sure to double check before you and Bruce get there.”
“Acceptable,” Damian said and let to find Pennyworth for his ride to class.
Doing art calmed him. That knowledge had been a surprise at first. While Damian had, of course, learned about art as part of his cultural and historical training, actually being able to engage in art was was something entirely knew. Something that was available to Damian only because of his Father’s allowance.
No, that was not quite right. Father didn’t allow Damian to do art, Father simply wanted them to be happy and art is what made Damian… perhaps not happy, but at least more at peace.
Peace had been such a rare thing in Damian’s life.
He still didn’t quite know what to do with it.
Annoyingly, class that day didn’t quite manage to tamper the churning in Damian’s gut. He could (and would) ignore the feeling, of course, but that did not mean it wasn’t there.
Or that it didn’t grow as Damian was waiting for Father to pick him up for class.
“You have put in the order we discussed?” Damian asked as he buckled his seatbelt.
“Yes, it should be ready shortly after we get there,” Father answered. “You were out quickly today.”
“Tch,” Damian looked away from his father’s searching gaze and focused on the world outside the window. He hated to have tells, but in a family of detectives it was impossible not to. “If it unlikely to be ready, perhaps we should stop by the Turkish bakery that is near. Surely there are items there that are not too sweet for his diet.”
“That’s a nice idea,” Father agreed with a thoughtful hum. “He may have never had them before so we can get a little selection of what you think he needs to try.”
Damian worked not to physically freeze. That felt suddenly like a great deal of responsibility. Which was silly, it was simply food.
“That is a sound idea,” Damian said instead of trying to face his sudden worry.
It was even more overwhelming in the face of all the options. Damian certainly spent far too long making a selection, but Father doesn’t rush him, so Damian tries to allow himself the time. The food is easily acquired after. Far too quickly that they were in front of the safehouse door. Father rested one hand on the back of Damian’s back, a bracing presence, before he knocked.
“Coming!” Grayson called needlessly through the door a few moments before he it swung open. “Hey guys, come in. It’s all good.”
Damian resisted the urge to nod to that, took a breath, and crossed the threshold.
Danny sat on the couch. The fabled day saving blue bear was clutched in the boy’s lap; clutched too tightly. Damian shot Grayson an accusatory look. Clearly it wasn’t ‘all good’.
Grayson rolled his eyes and took the box of sweets from Damian to take to the kitchen with Father.
Damian was left alone with Danny.
At least it gave Damian time to properly study the other boy. Not blood son. Clone. Better and worse at once— a copy of Father. It was clear how much Danny looked like Bruce, a redundant thought now that they knew Danny was a clone, but it crossed Damian’s mind all the same. It was odd to see the still slightly sunken cheeks and too prominent collar bones on someone that looked so much like Father, so much more like Father than Damian did.
Idly, Damian wondered if Danny would ever reach Father’s stature, what with his past. Damian himself had started to grown into wild shoulders and broad chest that would someday be his body over the last year, but Danny had not.
Danny, at least a year older, was still far too slight.
But older.
The oldest blood.
Would he try to take Damian’s place now? It would only be just, with how poorly Damian had behaved when he first arrived, especially to Drake. And Damian’s brash attacks, Danny would have the right to his. He was oldest…
“Are… are you alright?”
Damian’s head snapped up at Danny’s words. When had he lost his focus?
“I do not know,” Damian said, too honest words tumbling across his tongue without his permission.
He didn’t know.
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fantasticallyfruity4 · 2 years ago
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Someone sees Steve in a corroded coffin tee and hits him with the “name 5 songs, poser” and Steve just starts laughing his ass off bc he doesn’t know the name of like more than 2. Granted, he is literally married to the guitarist. So he just keeps laughing in this dudes face and this dude is getting more and more pissed at whatever bar or restaurant this happens in and five minutes later Eddie finally leaves the bathroom and he’s like “baby love what’s so funny?”
And jackass is fucking starstruck and confused bc Eddie’s looking at this poser with the most amused loving eyes on the face of the earth.
“You fucking jackass, I’m MARRIED to EDDIE FUCKING MUNSON I don’t need to know a single god damn song my closet is FULL of these. Shit, I have corroded coffin shirts that he HAND DREW the band name on in 19-fucking-86 at my fucking parents kitchen table. I have been on nearly every tour in the last 20 years since they STARTED touring in ‘87 and I am the ONLY groupie eddie munson has ever fucked get real”
And Eddie is very amused but also like “babe that’s enough, settle down before this goes on YouTube”
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jayflrt · 1 year ago
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a stoner’s guide to starbucks
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PAIRING ▸ lee heeseung x fem!reader (ft. enha, winter from aespa, beomgyu from txt, and dino from svt)
GENRES ▸ social media au (smau), crack, fluff, stoner au, strangers to lovers
WARNINGS ▸ profanity, sexual jokes, zero braincells, limited knowledge of the starbucks corporation, weed consumption, dumb shenanigans, ignore timestamps!
SUMMARY ▸ in which you work at the starbucks where heeseung is a regular at (and considered a public enemy). also he only goes when he’s stoned off his ass.
AUTHOR’S NOTE ▸ hello !! i am alive (real) also i was so committed to the bit that i got high to make this <3 shoutout @hoonbear for the Extensive Starbucks Knowledge 🫡 i would also like to note that i am NOT doing a tag list for this smau. also please note that this is a fictional setting and to boycott starbucks in real life for firing their workers over their pro palestine speech. remember to do your daily click!
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INCOMING MESSAGES !
TEASER
PROFILES ONE | TWO
01. weed guy beomgyu
02. red bitch with the freckles rizz
03. starbucks public enemy #1
04. 50% cut ???
05. lee heeseung: upstanding citizen, NOT murderer
06. clearing up misunderstandings with an aqi under 50
07. chat is this real
08. daddy’s home 2
09. biodegrade ur chance at romance
10. triple filtered reverse osmosis water filtration system
11. losing the idgaf war
12. crazy gets u bitches
13. banned in the name of love
14. riki s worded irl??
15. 8ball brings nations together
16. killing myself postponed tonight repostponed
17. scheming sponsored by crazy bitch 62 and unimportant goon
18. the do-over date to end all first dates
19. seek BetterHelp.com
20. quarterly store meeting (remote)
21. WHAT ARE WE
22. heejake support group for heejake victims
23. bro fumbled the unfumbleable
24. sunghoon is the new Papa John
25. according to penal code 837 🤓☝️
26. jungwon pulls bitches (the duolingo owl) too
27. someone PLEASE take jungwon to see the teenage mutant ninja turtles movie
28. 14th date’s the charm
29. doc mcuggo
30. nothing to write home about
31. LONDON I KNOW HOW YOU FEEL I LOST MY QUEEN TOO
32. starbucks double chocolate brownies
33. having a kid together before dating is next level
34. tweaking out on 5 hour energy
35. 7.83 inches
36. The Milk Makes The Man, And The Man Makes The Milk
37. sunghoon from papa john's from starbucks
38. then who's flying the plane???
39. league of legends quarantine ex girlfriend
40. WELCOME HOME CHEATER 😐
41. unknown evil forces (chaewon)
42. friends to rivaling coffee shop employees au
43. do NOT get the weed frap
44. now on channel 9 news
45. choose your fighter heeseung tit variation
46. kitten i'll be honest, daddy's about to kill himself
47. a fire can be put out but missing a bereal is forever
48. baby's first customer connection score
49. #STARBUCKS_FIRST_WIN
50. epilogue
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UNCUTS !
weekly weed check 🗣️
SUNGHOONXJLAW
happy weedsgiving
minjake texts
the Sunghoon Special
goons vs baby shark movie
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COMPLETED 12/1/23
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airaibunny · 10 months ago
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PRAISE/SOFT/ETC SMUT PROMPTS
1. “i need you, right here/now”
2. “i’ll go slow/i’ll be gentle”
3. “tell me what feels good”
4. “do you trust me?”
5. “do you like that?”
6. “please teach me”
7. “i want you, now”
8. “you look so pretty on your knees”
9. “it’s okay, im right here”
10. “i got you”
11. “don’t hold it in, it’s okay”
12. “don’t call me that, that’s what everyone else calls me”
13. “we can go for as long as you want”
14. “does it taste/feel good?”
15. “you’re doing so well”
16. “i want you, now”
17. “i love you so much”
18. “i want you to fuck me, *name*”
19. “you look so pretty right now”
20. “don’t stop yourself, let me hear”
21. “please don’t stop”
22. “do you want to take it off of me?”
23. “do you want to touch?”
24. “can i touch?”
25. “what about you?”
26. “let me do it for you”
27. “does that feel good?”
28. “you’re so cute”
29. “like that, i like that”
30. “can i touch you too?”
31. “am i going too fast?”
32. “can you do that again?”
33. “do you want more?”
34. “your *body part* are/is so pretty”
35. “do you want to stop?”
36. “i’ve wanted this for such a long time”
37. “aw, poor baby, do you want me to take care of this for you?”
38. “kiss me, i don’t care where”
39. “i don’t care where you touch me”
40. “i don’t care what you call me” - “can i call you mommy?”
41. “are you comfortable?”
42. “let me help you”
43. “do you need help?”
44. “keep going”
45. “you taste so sweet”
46. “do you want to try?”
47. “breathe for me”
48. “you’re doing such a good job”
49. “i’m so proud of you”
50. “tell me what you want”
51. “let me try”
52. “don’t cover up/don’t be embarrassed”
53. “i want you to touch me”
54. “you sound so pretty”
55. “turn around for me”
56. “louder”
57. “quieter”
58. “you look so hot right now”
59. “play with me”
60. “i’ve been waiting all day”
61. “harder, please”
62. “i think i deserve a reward”
63. “you’ve been so good lately, you deserve a reward”
64. “i love your tits/ass/etc”
65. “you’re the only one that gets to touch, pretty girl”
66. “this is exactly how i imagined it”
67. “keep doing that, please”
68. “you feel so good”
69. “kiss/touch me, everywhere”
70. “you’re so gorgeous”
71. “i want you to keep going, forever”
72. “you’re all mine” - “hm…” - “say it” - “i’m all yours”
73. “i want to do so many things to you”
74. “you look amazing, really, but i think i prefer the dress on the floor”
75. “i need you”
76. “i love making you so flustered, you get so cute”
77. “do you like it when i touch right here?”
78. “let me eat you out while you do that, please?”
79. “can you teach me?”
80. “can i call you mommy?”
81. “shower with me”
82. “i want to taste you so bad”
83. “i don’t care how, i just want you to touch me”
84. “i want to feel you inside”
85. “you’re not going to fall, i’ve got you”
86. “you looked so hot out there”
87. “breathe, please"
88. “you’re being such a good girl for unnie”
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hhie · 3 months ago
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i love you im sorry💡
idol!haechan x dancer!reader
genre : exes to lovers , bff to lovers (kinda)
idol au , fluff & angst
warning : alcohol, profanity, nsfw , lots of insensitive/mean jokes , age gap (4 years), haechan is a little obsessed with her, ~ more to be added
pls note that / characters actions and behaviour are not associated to them in real life / pictures are from pinterest/ this is purely fictional !!!
synopsis : 2 years ago , you and your best friend fell in love with one another. Only for him to leave you and cut you off with no explanation. What if , 2 years later, you decided to take a big step into your career, thinking that it is the best decision you’ve made in your life.
Unaware of what’s going to happen … you should be fine right?
from me: hello! this is my first ever smau and au i hope you are as excited as i am. I can’t wait to share with you my work!! pls feel free to let me know if l need any improvements. Feedbacks are appreciated, i will try my best to commit to this and finish it up without abandoning it. So please be patient with me , love you guys!
taglist OPEN! - @junviadinho @injunnie-lemon @sunghoonsgfreal @nessaassen02 @dudekiss3r @munstvrs @sthwaaberry @nmlee @ourbeautifulaffair @chenlesfeetpic @jaeminnanaaa17 @roseangelxfuma @fullsunahceah @taeeflwrr @chan-yeoldelling @anglswon @yyangj3lly @thegracerammy @jeonghansshitester @swanyvess
(dm/ comment to be added)
status | ongoing ~ est 35 chapters
updates: every weekend (or spontaneously …)
MASTERLIST
haechan & bros | y/n’s community
1. that’s just the way life goes
2. approval !!!
3. am i nervous or am i just excited
4. WHAT??
5. step up your game
6. he’s trying
7. awkward…
8. drunk af
9. am i dreaming rn??
10. baby steps
11. HOW DID THEY FIND ME?
12. dinner AGAIN
13. a lil tipsy
14. complicated
15. fucked up ALOT
16. love therapist or something
17. uhoh
18. first round
19. slowly and steadily
20. tough decision
21. i dont care
extras : 🎥
PAST | PRESENT | LIVING WITH YOU
603 notes · View notes
aestherin · 2 years ago
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— KEEP MY HEART ♡
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scaramouche x f!reader social media au
SUMMARY — you find plenty of guys around you attractive, but there is only one you’re willing to make the first move on: the guy you first saw during your older brother’s soccer game. spoiler: he's a player from your rival university.
status: on-going | taglist: closed
genres: social media au, college au, strangers to lovers, crack, fluff, a sprinkle of angst (?), modern au, i wanted to do smth chill haha
extras: playlist — [click here] 🤍
author's notes:
omg 2nd smau is here!!
updates may be inconsistent, i don't have a posting schedule
again, idk what i'm doing haha
english is not my first language so expect grammatical and typographical errors (bear with me please :"D)
will contain swearing
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PLAYERS.
— SL4YERS — the reds — the blued
SCOREBOARD.
game start ! (prologue)
— FIRST HALF
goal 01. i feel something ¬ goal 02. live a good life goal 03. let's play chess ¬ goal 04. do you like cats goal 05. a proof to your claim ¬ goal 06. am i being rejected goal 07. my baby ¬ goal 08. happy birthday goal 09. do you like sweets ¬ goal 10. i'm loyal, sir goal 11. my name ¬ goal 12. ghosted goal 13. unbothered ¬ goal 14. stupid is the new sexy goal 15. call me baby ¬ goal 16. i'm taking you out goal 17. kuni
— HALF TIME
goal 18. i can teach you ¬ goal 19. one thing goal 20. home ¬ goal 21. available for sale goal 22. my money, my choice ¬ goal 23. are you cold? goal 24. note to self ¬ goal 25. wear mine goal 26. they'll never like you ¬ goal 27. it was boring goal 28. we aren't a couple ¬ goal 29. what happened goal 30. something wrong ¬ goal 31. they're definitely dating goal 32. you but in meow ¬ goal 33. you're my best friend
— SECOND HALF
goal 34. flowers for you ¬ goal 35. how do i kick my brother out
goal 36. can i call? ¬ goal 37. are you gatekeeping me?
goal 38. pardon my french ¬ goal 39. tied
goal 40. good luck kiss
game over ! (epilogue): where's the trophy
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TAGLIST I @lady-elodie @aiikalvr @lovely-althxa @unsterblich-prinz @xiaosonlybeloved @xiaomainlmao @cindywasneverhere @coquettemaiden @sunsethw4 @lunavixia @calickoh @arealistonao3 @lowkeyivorie @zyilas @mondaymelon @yukiipc @heartswonder @st0pthatsgay @ozzierenato @astreaa-express @shewolfmiko @lovelyycherries @myaaones @countessqin @aloveablechaos @letthewindlead @lunaavity @local-blueberry-boy @luminestars @layla240 @useless-potatho @atlaszi @alatusorrow @lahsram2201 @sakiimeo @user11918163805279 @vqazx @neigesprincess @kunicrush @yoursockstinks @hotgirlshit5 @mikctp @crucnhice @apotatouwu @yuaenri @sammybeefangirls @miko1ly @deffenferofjustice @etherisy @sagegreenthinks
i cant mention more than 50 people in one post so the other taglists will be in the reblogs instead!! 🤍
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vampyr-ss · 3 months ago
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baby | s. getou
wc: 1.2k
other: chat this was a random thought so it's unedited this is brainrot.
warnings: dark content (stepcest) + non con kinda sorta + mating press + daddy kink + 'angel' + infidelity + creampie + breeding kink + squirting + pussy slapping + slapping + subspace + smut under the cut babe
geto knew your pretty little cunt couldn't take the pounding he wanted to give you. he's watched you walk around the house in those tiny fucking shorts with no panties. he's watched you lean over to pick something up in just your thong and a big shirt--his shirt. he doesn't even remember lending you any of his shirts.
his marriage to your mother is on the rocks because she's cheating on him. he knows this, you know this, and you've always thought he was attractive. you didn't care that they got married when you were 19, you don't care that he's 20 years older than you. you want him. your mother doesn't deserve him.
geto isn't an idiot, he knows you've been trying to fuck him. he didn't 'let it happen', he plotted on it. he waited until your mom left for work. he waited until her car pulled out of the driveway before he found himself practically charging into your room. you were still laying down in bed on your phone, silently giggling at whatever was on the bright screen.
he hadn't cared before what you were laughing at, and he sure as hell doesn't care now. all he needed was to fuck your throat, fuck you, and watch his cum ooze out of every hole he could possibly fill. a very reasonable ask if you asked him.
"the fuck are you crying for?" geto asks you as he watches the tears spill from your eyes. his feet are steadily on the bed and your legs dangle over his shoulders. your ass hurts from the previous slaps he'd adorned it with, but nothing beats the pleasure that ripples through your body when he slaps you across your face. "da- suguru i'm sorry!"
he tuts at you and his thrusts only get stronger. he wraps his hand around your throat for more leverage, and at this point he's basically throwing his body weight into his thrusts. the way your pussy clenches around him has him thanking god for you, for this cunt, for this life. he hasn't had pussy like this in years.
"-too much! 's too much suguru i can't daddy please! i feel like-" you pause to catch your breath since his hand is tight around your neck. another sob racks your body when geto slaps you again, anger building in his body. "feel like what? you're the one who kept bending over in front of me. you kept wearing those slutty ass panties so i could see a preview of this cunt." you shake your head in an attempt to deny everything he's saying but the both of you know it's true.
your pussy clenches at the thought of him watching you bend over and thinking about it later. did he think about it while fucking your mom? did he wish it was you instead? "i'm sorry! i'm sorry daddy!" you're practically screaming your pleas and geto takes the time to shift his free hand to rub at your clit. he wishes he could fuck your ass and watch your pussy clench around nothing because you don't even deserve his dick.
"my slutty stepdaughter, what am i gonna do with you angel?" you shake your head to say that you're not a slut but before you can say anything a loud moan rips from your throat. "that's it sweet angel." he purrs. "take it. this is what you wanted right? for your stepdaddy to fuck this tight cunt?" he frees your throat to wait for your response.
he leans over so he's closer to you, pressing wet kisses along your neck. "admit it. my sweet angel's just a fucking slut." you clearly haven't found your voice again because you just nod. geto tastes the tears as they run from your cheeks to your neck. "admit it or you won't cum. i'll make sure you get to the edge and then i'll pull out. i know how desperate this pussy is. sloppy fuckin' cunt." his hand comes down on your pussy for extra measure, a wet squelch following the slap to your cunt.
"yes! i'm just your slut daddy, please let me cum. i need it so bad!" your hands find purchase on his back and your pretty acrylics dig deep into his back. geto can feel the skin break a little and the pain somehow fuels him into pounding your pussy further. he can feel his orgasm get closer and closer with each thrust and with your pretty moans and the tightest cunt he's ever felt aren't helping it either.
geto laughs at your begging and adjusts so he's face to face with you. he glances over your face, taking in how swollen your lips and eyes are. your face is somewhat red from him slapping your cheeks and somehow he's harder than before. "good girl," he pauses to grin widely, "maybe i'll fill this pussy up and give you a baby. you can't leave me then, huh? can't leave your daddy for one of these stupid fucking college boys."
you shake your head in protest, your hands pushing at the bottom of his stomach to get him out of you. "no! no, please! i can't- how- no!" geto understands your questions even if you don't get them out properly. "i don't care, you can just tell your mom one of those frat boys knocked you up. i'll take care of you, angel. i'll divorce your mom to marry this perfect pussy." you cry out as he finishes his sentence, shifting your hips away from his as the knot tightens as far as it can go.
"stop running, angel. take daddy's dick, yeah? go ahead. cum for me." you shake your head again, because you know when you cum he'll cum with you. he'll cum inside of you and make you a mother. that isn't something you can truly explain. geto sighs heavily from above you, gripping your cheeks in his hand. "cum so i can make you a mommy, baby. cum so i can see my cum ooze out of your perfect pussy."
despite wanting to fight it your body convulsed under his. you lean up to kiss geto, crying out against his lips to no avail. your stomach shifts and a new sense of euphoria floods your senses. your pussy twitches as you cum, fluids spurting out against geto's pelvis and onto the sheets under the two of you. geto grunts against your lips, chanting your name like an unanswered prayer. he barely gets another thrust in before he's coming deep inside of you.
he continues short sharp thrusts into you, forcing more cum out of you and your orgasm to prolong. your legs are shaking on his shoulders, but he doesn't care. he's praying that this takes so he can finally leave your bitch of a mother. "atta girl, wasn't so bad was it? you gonna have my baby, angel?"
defeated, you nod as your eyes flutter open. geto smiles down at you, a sweet sincere smile that almost makes you forget who he is. you almost forget that this is wrong and that you could be pregnant with your step-dad's baby. "yes, daddy. i can't wait." you purr softly, smiling dreamily up at him before he kisses you softly.
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