#i always feel so sad when other people talk bad about their earlier stuff

[smallgermancar]

[sweetbottletops]

When Agu said one phase was ending and a new one was beginning I didn't realize the next phase would be putting Aya in the Pain Cave.

Ch 102

It looks like Koga is spending at least part of her juice box lunch periods with the cool kids now.

The bully (he hasn't earned a name) still seems to be mentally in that desk-kabedon Koga delivered earlier. I don't think he actually knows much about music, but he is still firmly stuck in her orbit with the other cool kids. She's got that kind of pull.

Meanwhile the subculture kids are in the hallway. It's easy to forget they aren't the cool kids and typically stuck to each other even before Koga. Narita gets to be included because Exhibit A.

It's always awkward when a friend crosses over genres and samples other groups at school. Even so...Aya is a touch too in the dumps for Chizuru to believe this is just related to Koga spending her lunch period with the norms. "Because of that?"

Chizuru is the drunken master of love gurus. Never misses even when she doesn't know where she's aiming.

Aka: Back in simpler times when Koga was having an existential crisis and being needy and Aya could fill her needs. Now Koga appears to be doing just fine in her identity and even found other people to talk to about music.

A twist of the knife. How the turn tables.

On a superficial level it doesn't seem like a big deal, but they are teenagers so everything is a big deal. Add in the fact Aya is closeted and hasn't been able to openly share her real feelings even to her best friend all this time and it's complicated.

She couldn't even do abstract girl talk at the overnight trip because "Onii-san" was right there among the girls. And her earlier gushing with Chizuru always was hidden behind "Onii-san".

Aya can only talk a bit more openly to Narita and Kanna and even then she's relying on them to fill in the blanks to accept why she's at this extreme level of desperate about Koga.

From Chizuru's POV Aya had never been interested in boy talk until "Onii-san" came into the scene, and "he" has drifted in and out of the scene unnamed like a "boyfriend" from Canada.

But she never pushed the issue. It was girl bonding stuff and something Chizuru had with Aya that was theirs if that makes sense. And then when Koga appeared Aya stopped gushing outside of when Chizuru would bring "him" up. Which was sus...

Chizuru is about to be jump scared with the title of this manga.

v v v

Chizuru is firing in every direction now. Her? Him? You?!!

The readers who had to have it spelled out to them vs the readers who knew. It was yuri all along.

She's hugging HERSELF. Help her!

The extra sad thing is going all the way back to the Radiohead performance it was Koga who reset them as friends.

Aya had an odd reaction to that at the time. Her crush wants to be friends. "There's no other option, right?" She didn't retract her crush after the reveal. It was Koga who downgraded them to friends and she went along with it. And it was fine at the time because it was the same Koga, however they were going to call it, and she got to at least be Koga's favorite and only.

Which isn't the healthiest considering how isolated Koga was, but when that's as close as you think you'll get with someone you like it's not so bad. She's stuck being hyper aware of how close she has the right to be and worries she might overstep and make Koga uncomfortable. What she wants is how close Joe and Kanna are. And that’s something she doesn't think she'll get. So there's the conflict.

Now Koga is the one feeling comfortable as herself in public and Aya is the only one left hiding who she is. From her perspective she thinks Koga doesn't know who she really is or how it will go over if she found out.

Team Chizuru + Nartia have a lot of work ahead of them. But now that they know at least Aya is not totally alone with her feelings anymore.

[madi-writes-things]

Nobody Pt. 4

(C.Sturniolo X Reader)

Summary:

Chris and Y/N never seemed to get along, but sometimes help comes from the most unexpected places

Word Count: 1,332

TW: Cursing, SH (not in detail, but it is talked about), fluff, PDA, fake dating chaos, mention of cramps and throwing up because of the pain, bad sex joke, use of emojis (I have no clue how else to explain the exact reactions other than the emojis), drinking/being drunk (I’ve never been drunk, so forgive me if my portrayal is off), Not Edited

A/N: I’m so sorry this took so long, I’ve literally been locked in my room for two weeks with no motivation. I really hope that y’all like this chapter. I’m also hoping to work on some other stuff coming up soon. 😁

-Madi <3

“”“”“”“”“”

Y/N’s POV

Nick and Matt stood at the island as me and Chris walked into the kitchen. I caught Nick’s eye as I set down enough food to feed a small militia. He just stares.

Matt hits him in the shoulder, prompting him to give him a dirty look before speaking. “I’m sorry…” He looked like he wasn’t sure what all he needed to apologize for. “I’m sorry that I punched you” he nodded toward Chris. “I’m sorry that I made you cry, I feel really bad about that.” He averts his eyes, and I think I see a small glint of shame.

I physically can’t stay mad at him, and I make it very obvious when I envelop him into a rib crushing hug. He whispers a small thank you in my ear before I walk back to the other side of the island to unpack the food. As I start unpacking breakfast I feel arms wrap around my waist, and a chin resting on my shoulder.

I freeze up, and Chris mumbles a quick “is this okay?” Into my hair. I look around realizing that Matt and Nick don’t even notice, much too invested in their food to care. I nod my head, trying to will the rosy shade to leave my face.

I’m failing miserably.

after breakfast me and Chris went upstairs to watch a movie in his room. Matt was quick to respond in the worst way possible.

“Sock that wang before you bang… and please be quiet, I don’t want to hear my brother doin it”

Y/N: 😨

Chris: 😮

Nick: 😟

Matt: 😁

needless to say, me and Chris practically teleported upstairs and away from that mortifying experience. We enter his room in a fit of laughter, practically collapsing onto the bed.

After a second I noticed that Chris had stopped laughing… his laughter is addictive, and I already missed it. I turned to see him staring at me with a look in his blue eyes that I couldn’t quite grasp. He looked happy and sad and something else all at once.

“What?” I giggled as I said it, still thinking about what Matt said only a few minutes earlier.

“are you doing okay?” This question again… I never know what to say when people ask me that. Right now I’m doing great… but in 30 minutes, or a week, or even a month I might break down again.

that’s never the answer that people want. They want something simple, yes or no. He stares at me patiently waiting for my response, it makes me feel bad for not having one.

“I’m okay right now…” he gives me a quick nod before speaking again.

“Okay, will you tell me when you aren’t doing good?” Why is he offering this, he doesn’t want to deal with me. “You need a safe space, and you clearly aren’t going to tell Nick. Let me be your safe space.”

“okay”

With that we got comfy on his bed and found a movie.

“”“”“”“”“”

things carried on like this for months.

doing good.

going down.

running to Chris.

repeat.

he was always so sweet and caring. He would hold me while I cried Myself to sleep, he would walk me home early from an event if I wanted to leave, he would hold my hair back and get me a heating pad when my cramps got bad… no matter what, he was there. He had also started being more touchy in public, leaning into the fake relationship for those around us. It made me feel things that I tried to avoid for years.

I think I hate him… how DARE he make me fall in love with him, knowing that none of this is real. How dare he kiss me at parties, and hold me during movie nights, and make me feel safe when none of it is real for him.

“you okay baby?” He snaps me out of my thoughts with the use of his new favorite nickname for me. I melt when he calls me his baby, unfortunately a small part of me also dies inside every time I hear it.

“yeah, just a little tired.” We’ve been at this party for like three hours, and I haven’t even touched my drink. When Chris is tipsy he get more brave with his PDA, I don’t want to risk forgetting a single moment where he is touching me.

“do you want to walk home?” He doesn’t want to leave, he shouldn’t have to leave because I’m sad that he doesn’t love me.

“no. we should stay, you’re having fun. I’m actually going to go get a drink, maybe it will make me feel better.” He looks at me for a second before letting go of my hip, allowing me to grab a drink.

“”“”“”“”“”

How did I get here?

It’s like one second I was listening to Chris tell a story, and now I’m dancing to some annoying pop song. I need to find Chris, I definitely had a few too many drinks.

I stumbled around for a minute, everything is spinning and making me want to throw up. I don’t know if I can walk all the way home, but I don’t want to make all of them leave early. I grab my phone in an attempt to call Chris, but by the time he picks up I’ve forgotten what I was doing.

“”“”“”“”“”

Chris’s POV

I look down at my phone to see that Y/N is calling me, and it makes me a little worried. I pick the phone up to my ear, trying to head over the sounds of music and talking. I don’t hear her, only making me more worried.

She almost never drinks, because she has a very low tolerance. Last time I saw her, she was already three drinks in and proclaiming her love for the song that was on.

That was an hour ago.

I quickly scour the crowd in an attempt to find her face. And when I do my heart drops.

There she is in her skin tight jeans and corset top, looking lost with tears in her eyes. I rush to her side, immediately pulling the drink from her hand. She looks like she’s about to start crying.

“hey baby, can you look at me please?” When I say that she starts crying and she doesn’t seem like she’s stopping any time soon. “Hey, it’s okay. Do you want to find somewhere quiet so that you can sit down for a minute?” She nods her head aggressively before stumbling towards the bedroom of whoever is hosting.

The Golden Trio

From: Chris

can y’all meet me in the master bedroom, Y/N is really drunk and needs to go home.

From: Nicky Bo Bicky

for sure, I’ll bring some water for her.

I turned to Y/N, she looked out of it. Then all of a sudden life came back to her eyes in the worst way possible. She almost fell down in her attempt to get to the bathroom.

“it’s okay baby” I whispered sweet nothings to her as I held her hair and rubbed her back. Nick and Matt showed up shortly after she finished dry heaving, and I don’t think I’ve ever seen her drink anything as fast as she drank that water.

If I thought it was a hassle trying to get her in the car, I had no clue how hard it would be to get her up a flight of stairs. She giggled as I picked her up bridal style… it made me so happy to hear her laughing.

once she got into more comfortable clothes, she fell asleep in no time.

as she held onto me and nuzzled into my side, my heart shattered. All I want is for her to be happy, but I know that I can’t fix everything. I kiss her on the forehead before rolling over and going to sleep.

“”“”“”“”“”

@unbruisable @bernardsbendystraws @sturniolo-fann

[slytherinbangchan]

Chap 6: Snooze. (Wolf hybrid Jisung x fem reader)

Finally updating this. Please don't forget to leave likes, reblogs or comments if you enjoy my writing💕 It's 2.3k words. (18 min read)

🔞Contains smut❣🔞

This is part of my Han Jisung & Hwang Hyunjin x fem reader hybrids au.

Hybrids!Au Masterlist Chap1 here

Learn More about the characters here

“Are you okay?” Jisung asks, checking on your trembling hands as your tears fall over them. “He hates me.” You say, unable to look at him, and Jisung scoffs. “No, he doesn't.” He says, checking your arms too.

“Y/n.” He calls, squating a bit so you look into his eyes. “He was just worried, and jealous.” He tells you in a soothing voice and you sniff as more tears fall down, making him chuckle at how cute you look. “Ah...” He says, picking you up to make you sit on the porch's railing. “I know his feelings. He'll be fine after a walk.” He says, but you're not so sure about that.

“You know... This is the second fight I got into tonight.” He tells you, trying to distract you from what just happened, and you sniff again and wipe some of your tears. “You got into a fight?” You ask as you sob a little, and he bites back a smile. “Mhm.” He says. Sweetely combing your hair back with his fingers to see your face better. “You fought Channie?” You guess and he nods. “Did you win?” You keep asking, making him scoff. “Of course I won. He's a city wolf.” He says with a smug smile on his face, making you chuckle softly.

“We're okay now though.” He tells you. Wipping the few tears left on your cheeks with his thumb. “Yeah, you looked all cute when I opened that door and you were laughing together.” You say, then you feel the tears coming again. “It had been such a long time since I saw you that happy around other people.” You say, making him chuckle again. “Ah, what's going on?” He asks as more tears fall down your cheeks suddenly.

“Y/n, I'm very happy.” He says, doing his best to carefully wipe all of them. “I just don't like people in general, not even hybrids. I don't like strangers.” He says. “But I love you.” He pecks your lips. “And... Hyunjinnie is not that bad.” He says and you dramatically gasp, making him laugh. “Yeah, yeah. I said that.” He says, and you finally chuckle again before the thought of Hyunjin growling at you earlier comes back to your head. “Ah, I shouldn't have brought him up.” He says after seeing your sad face appear again, and you smile softly. “I'm sorry. I was just thinking...” You sigh. “I'm just hoping I can talk to him tomorrow.” You say, and he nods, caressing your face with the back of his hand.

“Sung-ah.” You call him. “Mhm?” He answers. “Thank you for loving me.” You say. “I really love you too.” You tell him, making his heart skip a beat as he blushes lightly. “Mhm.” He says, too shy now to look in your eyes, and you chuckle softly, taking a better look at him. “You look so cute right now.” You say, taking a dry leaf and some spider web off his hair.

“It grew a lot.” You tell him as you comb his fringe out of his face with your fingers. “Should I give you a haircut tomorrow?” You ask, but his head is somewhere else. He holds your hand, taking it out of the way to kiss you, and you pull him closer, deepening the kiss.

His hands on your thighs now. “Let's go to bed.” He tells you, noticing how cold your legs are, and you pout at him. “Wait, I want to stay for a bit.” You say, a bit wary of going back to your room to avoid thinking of Hyunjin. “You're freezing.” He says, stepping back a bit so you can get down the railing, but you pull him closer again. “You're warm enough for both of us.” You tell him, hiding your arms on his chest. “You're literally just wearing a shirt, Y/n.” He nags at you, then he just picks you up, and you reluctantly allow him to take you inside. After all, Jisung has always been really good at making you forget hurtful stuff.

“At least let's watch a movie while you warm up if you don't want to sleep.” He says, leaving you on the sofa and handing you a blanket. Your heart flutters a bit seeing him like that. He would always behave just like a cute puppy not that long ago. Following you everywhere and only wanting your attention. No matter what else was going on in your life, how tired you were. He just wanted to play. But he's changed a lot. Now he really sees you.

“Stop pouting.” He chuckles. “You were freezing cold.” He says. “Well, stop nagging and come cuddle me.” You simply say, lying down a bit, and he happily takes his place between your legs. “So you're not mad at me?” He asks with puppy eyes. His fluffy tail waggling. You shake your head and he nuzzles your cheek, making you chuckle at how cute he is. Maybe he hasn't changed that much after all. “Were you worried about me getting angry cause you took me inside?” You ask him petting his head, and he nods. “Mhm. I thought I'd be sleeping down here all alone today.” He says, and you chuckle. “Nah, not tonight. I missed you too much while I was away.” You tell him, and he shyly hides on the crook of your neck. “I missed you too.” He says, his voice all muffled cause he's still hidding. He kinda smells after the night hunting and the fight with Chan, but that only makes his natural scent stronger, and you're feeling all kinds of ways about it. Cause your heart is fluttering at how deeply you love him, but you're also getting incredibly horny. Even more so having his body weighting on yours just in the right places.

You gulp down some saliva as your throat dries thinking about him. He stops moving completely for a second, and his ears twitch. Can he hear your heart racing? It skips a beat as you feel him getting hard against your heat, and another as he moves again, sitting up just enough to see your blushing face.

He scoffs before a cocky smile draws on his face, and he bites his lower lip as he leans over to meet your lips in a slow, sensual kiss, that makes your whole body ache for him.

You pull from his joggers, hinting that you want them out of the way, and he distractedly pulls them down, just enough for him to slide inside of you. You moan softly as he stretches your walls. His breath heavier as he tries so hard to keep in line. “Baby...” You call him in a needy tone, and he chuckles softly, resting his head on the crook of your neck again. “I'm going crazy.” He says, and you bite back a smile and peck his cheek. “It's okay baby, you know I don't mind you being rough.” You try and soothe him, and he scoffs. “Seriously... You have no idea how many times I've fantasized about this just today... You smell so fucking good, y/n...” He says and a sweet chill runs through your body. “Then why are you not fucking me?” You ask before meeting his lips again. You know how dangerous having sex with him can get when heat hormones are involved, but tonight you really just don't care. You've missed him too much. “I've been waiting too...” You tell him, moving your hips a bit. His hands grasping on that sofa, leaving dents on it. “God, y/n...” He says, trying to hold onto his last bit of sanity. “I really don't want to hurt you tonight.” He confesses, and your heart hurts for him. “You won't.” You cup his face on your hands so he'll look at you. He takes a deep breath and you nod and meet his lips again. “I'm sorry. I was being selfish.” You apologize and he pouts. “Should we just kiss for now, then?” You ask, and he nods, leaning over to meet your lips. He rests some of his body weight on you while you make out, and you don't know exactly why but feeling how heavy he actually is makes your heart beat faster. “Are you okay?” He asks, a bit confused about your heartbeat, but you don't even know how to explain what's going on, so you just kiss him again, and you do so until his body is ready to listen to his brain.

His hands on your thighs now, sweetely caressing your skin. His cute lips all red and puffy after all those kisses. His breath a bit more steady. You take his hand and guide it to your tits, making him squeeze, and his dick twitches inside you. “Baby...” You call him between kisses, and he nods and thrusts into you a couple times, very slowly, allowing you to feel every inch of him. You bite on your lips, so aroused after all that touching and kissing that you could come just like this. “Please...” You beg, and he groans before picking up the pace a little.

“God, you're so fucking big...” You say, and he scoffs and pecks your forehead, nose and lips. “You keep saying stuff while sounding like that and it'll get even bigger.” He tells you before pecking your lips once again, making you blush lightly just at the thought of it.

Your hands grasping on his hair as he bites on your neck and tits. It kinda hurts, but it feels amazing too. “Faster...” You whine softly, and he meets your lips, picking up the pace once again. “Sung-ah...” You moan, making his dick even harder. He grunts. His hips moving on their own for a second, thrusting into you so harshly. “Sorry... I-I'm sorry.” He apologizes, but he can't control it anymore. You smell too god, you sound heavengly, and you feel too fucking amazing wrapped around his cock. He just can't take it. “No... It's good...” You manage to say. “It's really good.” You tell him, meeting his lips. Moaning in the kiss as some pleasure tears fall down your face while reaching your high. And seeing you melting under him like that is just too much for him. “Y/n...” He calls you. “Mhm, cum inside me, baby.” You tell him, sweetely cupping his face with your hand. “Ah... fuck...” He groans grasping on the sofa's fabric as he cums.

You meet his lips before he collapses over you, resting his head on your shoulder as his shaky breath fans on your neck and you try to catch on your breath. “Are you okay?” He asks you, and you turn your head a bit to see his face. “Mhm~.” You say, and he smiles. Making you chuckle at how cute he looks. “Are you happy?” You ask him. His hair sticking on his face cause of the sweat. “Mhm, I'm very happy.” He says as you comb his hair back a bit, and you just feel the urge to kiss him again. His ears twitching before he suddenly sits up. “W-What?” You ask, following his eyes to the top of the stairs. “I think your friend woke up.” He says, and your heart stops for what it feels like a minute. “Oh god...” You say, sitting up too.

“What..? Oh... Did you forget your friend was here?” He asks as you frantically look around until you spot the blanket he threw at you earlier. “Let's just go to bed.” You tell him as you blush, pulling from the blanket that's under his butt to cover yourself, and he confusedly follows you upstairs. You can feel his seed dripping down your thighs as you walk up those stairs. God, you can't believe you completely forgot about her. Did she really just heard all of that? Like, it doesn't matter, right? She already knows you're dating Jisung, but... It's kinda embarassing too having her hearing you moaning like that...

He gets in the room after you, closing the door behind him. “It's okay, master. I think she fell asleep again.” He tells you, but suddenly you don't care about that anymore. Your eyes are fixed now on your messy bed with your messy clothes on it, and now you're totally aware of why you didn't want to come back to your room.

You sigh, picking up your shirt from where Hyunjin left it as Jisung silently watches you. You still don't understand why he was so mad at you. Was he jealous again? Maybe you should have stayed with him and just wait for Jisung to come upstairs, but your body was moving by its own will when you rushed to check on him. You're sure it would have done the same for Hyunjin if he was the one missing and howling in the woods. But he probably wouldn't believe you even if you told him that. And you don't blame him either. “Y/n...” Jisung calls you, carefully taking the shirt from your hands to toss it away. “It's been a long night.” He says, sweetely caressing your cheek with the back of his hand. “Stop torturing yourself.” He says before pecking your nose, and you bite your lower lip trying not to cry. “I... I'm scared about him not coming back.” You say, and Jisung chuckles softly. “Love...” He chuckles again. “He'll be back by tomorrow.” He says, pulling you into a hug. He feels so helpless right now though. “What can I do to make you feel better?” He asks, pouting a bit, and you squeeze him tighter as you think about it. “Maybe help me wash up and cuddle me to sleep?” You ask, looking at him, and he softly smiles and nods before meeting your lips.

➽───────────────❥

Masterlist

Hybrids!Au Masterlist

Taglist: @a-crazylittlekillerqueen @hellothisisprincesskitty @redstayrosie

(let me know if any of you guys wanna be added to the taglist)

Chap6____Chap7

[cheri-2047]

Genshin angst headcanons

scaramouche lyney kaeya ga ming

my bad if I accidentally mischaracterized them

Scara:

He used to love hanging out with people. (Just like niwa) to make him feel like he has a heart. To try to get him to be human even if deep down he knows it will never happen. Whenever he is alone, he feels dead and empty.

he spaces out a lot, while walking, doing his homework and other shits. But when he does it’s because he wonders what would have happened if his mother loved him. He wonders if he would still be a monster

he’s the type to laugh the pain away, but when he does he’s still crying a lot (this is based on one of the lines he says)

He wonders if it’s really worth it. Like with relationships if it’s worth continuing. Deep down he’s still scared of being betrayed and abandoned again

lyney

He physically cannot cry around others. Even if he wanted to, he physically cannot. He has a hard time accepting himself and is always wondering if people would actually like him.

I bet he tried opening up before, he really did. But then people laughed it off, thinking it was a joke and taking it for a mere piece of entertainment.

i bet after arguing with freminet about his mask, he spent hours telling lynette how much he felt bad. He wanted to apologize but didn’t know how.

he cares for everyone, even if he has his own problems. He comforts people when they are down but…he always wonders, who will comfort him when he is down?

if people were to criticize him then laugh, he’d laugh along. Like “oh the magic trick u did earlier was so bad!! Haha!!” And hee laugh along. He is used to this type of criticism but once everything piles up, he actually gets hurt.

Kaeya

Whenever he’s drunk, he drunk mumbles. Except he’s whispering too soft for anyone to hear.

he loves to drink because not only does it help him forget (he actually doesn’t forget) he likes the feeling of warmth. He missed the warmth of “home”

this man hates looking at himself without his eyepatch. He thinks that if he never interfered with diluc, diluc would have been happier. He thinks that it’s all his fault.

ga ming

When his dad sold all his dancing stuff, he cried and cried. Talking to the moon thinking it’s his mother. “Mom…what do I do? Why..dad took away the one thing I loved and the archons took you away from me too…what more will they take?” Typa stuff

he’s very uncomfy whenever people try to persuade him to go back home. He dislikes thinking about it and when he does, he keeps his mind busy. This kid barely ever has breaks because his mind is busy avoiding problems.

he can’t be sad, not because he’s scared but because he knows his mother wouldn’t want him to be. But he knows one day he will spill and everything will come out. Hes very scared for that day.

this was not proofread

[mangogoop]

!!!DRAGON'S RISING S2 PART 2 SPOILERS!!!

(i don't want to spoil people who didn't watch the early release and want to wait until it officially comes out so don't read if no spoil)

Okay so I have many thoughts about the rest of this season but we are mainly going to focus on jay (cus i want to)

WHAT I LIKED (my opinion):

- how he joined Ra's and that he owes it to him since he 'saved him from the administration' amazing great love it chef kiss. Loved the reveal of it with jay turning around and the ninja responding with 😮

- Him losing to Nya in the fight. To be fair I would've loved it either way but i like it specifically because it gives Jay a reason for hating Nya (due to him failing Ra's) so potential for angst in the future

- Nya's 'i love you' to jay and then him responding 'and i hate you' hit me like a fricking brick love it

- Ra's saying to Jay 'i didn't save you to fail' (or something along those lines i don't remember BUT STILL) good line makes me feel bad for my boy. Because like Jay wanting to repay Ra's but failing making him feel weak and not useful and AH it hurts but we love the angst

- Jay being a menace. The shatter spin definitely adds to this cus I want the writers make me not like what this character is doing, hate his actions. And his attitude is a good place to start so hopefully he will start doing some messed up stuff in the future

WHAT COULD'VE BEEN BETTER (in my opinion):

- The portrayal of jay's power. I feel like him doing the shatter spin then immediately losing to Nya making him not really be portrayed as a threat at all (which makes me sad cus he's powerful pls he is). I'm not saying he shouldn't have lost to Nya but maybe make him show his strength in some other way (through another fight or training beforehand but he's not recognized by the ninja so the shock of it being jay is still there).

- How long he was on screen......we got like 5 minutes of jay AH. pls like i felt that through the posters for the rest of this season I got the impression he was going to play a huge role (aka be in more than 1 ep). That may just be me but i feel like they kinda just discarded jay and were like ya thats it he got sent somewhere else now lol. Like huh??? where he go???

- Again this may just be me but i'm not always the hugest fan of 'explains aloud during a fight where this character has been'. Like cus why would he do that, tbf it is Jay and he would explain in middle of a battle 'oh ya btw this is what i've been up to'.

WHAT IM HOPING FOR THE FUTURE (MAYBE):

- jaya angst (this is given shall i say more)

- more jay screen time. PLSPSLSPSSPSLSPSLSPLS

- Arin and Jay friendship. I can talk about my thoughts on Arin's journey in this season later because I rlly like the direction he's going so i'm hoping interactions with them are to come.

- Jay being actually portrayed as a threat. Have him win a fight please

- Maybe angst to come from how the other ninja speak of jay. for example earlier in the season (or season 1 i don't remember) when they described jay they kinda portrayed him as the worst/weakest ninja (i will need to find the clip of what they exactly say later but i believe that's what's implied). I believe that the ninja being like 'oh but we're your family we love you' and jay responding like 'bro nah y'all see me as weak wth you don't love me'. I think it could be fun

Overall, like any season there are parts I liked and parts I didn't, I'm just hoping we have more screen time for our boy jay in the future 🫡

[ben-marco]

so glad i blocked leigon and many but one a while ago simply because they did things that i personally found weird (although many but one did say on tumblr that they "didnt care" about legion proudly claiming to be a radfem.. so. idk)

i feel like the amount of slideshows and stuff of them graphically describing things that happened during the abuse they both faced was a bit odd, i mean they had TW / CWs but still. i found myself going back to those slideshows continuously to try and trigger something because, guess what, it did trigger things, and im so desperate for that smoking gun of proof that i'll do anything. which in hindsight just feels dangerous. i dont trust either of them to be good people, especially since on many but one's tumblr they just spouted slurs they couldnt reclaim in response to someone saying that a term they used is derogatory (and they defended that by saying "[alter] was using it to describe herself" which doesn't erase the meaning behind the term..)

leigon posts vents a lot without any trigger warnings, and blocks / unfollows people at random for simply disagreeing with them. ive heard that they also tend to get their followers on people's asses if they talk about how leigon spreads misinfo!

as someone with npd i used to just dismiss it by saying "oh they have npd i get it" but no... what is even going on at this point. their whole alpha to omega document is just full of misinfo (mainly the fact that not all programming types use greek letter names, i think they just pulled that out of their ass to make the document "aesthetic"), which is sad because it is really well written.

Thank you so much for bringing this up, anon. I always thought those posts were really strange, too.

When people post extremely detailed, graphic/triggering things like that, it makes me wonder what their motive is. What do they expect from those posts and from people's responses to them? What are they looking for? I've known people who post things like that and all of them have either been bad actors or people who are so unstable that they really should be working on basic stabilization before they delve into these spaces to begin with.

Posting things like that is so, so, so dangerous too. For the poster and for people seeing it. I think a lot of people are drawn to return to that kind of content to see if it triggers them-- and guess what, that content is triggering and upsetting to most sane people, survivors or not. Most people are going to be upset by, or triggered by, graphic discussions of OEA and surrounding topics.

I just...don't think those kinds of graphic posts benefit anyone. You're putting that information out there about your abuse/trauma for god knows who to see (and in Legion's case, attaching your face to it too), potentially putting yourself in danger, and for what? So someone else can see it and be triggered by it?

I said earlier that I've only ever seen this kind of behavior in people who are bad actors or just very destabilized. And honestly I feel like Legion is a bad actor at this point, especially due to their defensiveness and their willingness to weaponize their followers against anyone who disagrees with them, as you mentioned. Their transphobia and participation in radfem circles is certainly a huge problem but it's not the only issue with them or their behavior.

I don't really know anything about Many But One other than that they associate with Legion, so I appreciate you mentioning those things about them.

[celticwolf55]

It's really cool when writers have playlists for their fics cause then you see what fits woth the story and all. Fake it till you make it is the first of your fics I read and it's one of my favorites so it's nice to see that playlist.

I've never heard reckless driving before but it's really good. Like "guess I'd die to keep your eyes on me"? For wenclair? Breathtaking honestly. I've only heard one other song by this artist and theyre making me a fan of hers. The song is Hate to be lame in case you're interested.

And epic omg I first heard about it late 2021/early 2022 and I've been obsessed since. I've waited so long that I'm kinda sad it'll be over soon. Just a man is one of the best songs from epic. All the edits to it are so good they hurt. Ruthlessness has to be my favorite though cause that's where it finally hits them how screwed they are.

I'm left without a choice and without a doubt

Guess the pack of wolves is swimming with the shark now

I've gotta make you bleed, I need to see you drown

And

You are far too nice, mercy has a price

It's the final crack, we're bound to break the ice now

You reveal your name, then you let him live

Unlike you, I've got no mercy left to give 'cause

Ruthlessness is mercy upon ourselves

These lyrics are golden. Different beast is up there for me too. Do you have a favorite song or saga?

I know it's a lot, my bad, but in my defense wenclair and epic are my hyperfixations and together is even better.

I feel that having a playlist, even if I don't always listen to it when I'm writing, it really helps get me into the headspace of the story. Fake it is the first popular fic that people have read of mine, which is totally fair since my earlier stuff wasn't that great. And I'm glad that you enjoyed the playlist I put together for it.

Reckless driving was something I literally listened to on repeat for MONTHS because it was what gave the good creative juices for writing, and the beat was great as well when the lyrics just faded into the background in my braid. The lyrics also hit really hard too, so I totally get your reaction to them. I haven't heard the song you're talking about, but Ceilings was also a song I listened to on repeat for a similar reason.

Now to Epic. I found it mid to late last year I think. Back when the Cyclops saga was the most recent one out. All of the edits and animatics were so incredible as well, adding different things to the songs and elevating them in different ways too. Ruthless is an incredible song too. It's the first time that Odysseus has some really harsh consequences and it hardens him in general (apart from Polities' death). And yeah, you get to feel how badly he's messed up too. I also remember how incredible the goosebumps were when that scrapped song was going around 'Get in the water'. It was so intense.

You're totally fine. I like your enthusiasm. I just spent several hours making a video of about 3 years worth of artworks I've done for Wenclair to my recent stuff. Hopefully I get inspired into making more artworks to hopefully finish the song I have behind it.

[kaylinalexanderbooks]

OC questionnaire

Thanks to @willtheweaver here and here, @mk-writes-stuff here, here, and here, and @somethingclevermahogony here.

I did Robbie, Gwen, Maddie, Noelle, Jedi, and Kelsey here.

I did Carmen, George, Akash, Sam, Lexi, and Ash. here.

Doing Gabriel, Carla, Parker, Rose, Alex, and Ewan under the cut!

#1- Gabriel

Did you have any formal education? If so, what was it like?

“I mean, I'm still receiving formal education, so your use of past tense is strange. I never attended Ceteri school. My parents raised me to know that I was Alii, and they always planned to send me over to the Aequales once I received my powers, since they were in direct contact with them the whole time. Ceteri school was counterproductive, so I was homeschooled until then. I now attend school in Alium. I'll admit, I do like it. At least, I do more than homeschooling from my parents. Not that they were terrible, but I don't mind more structure and people.”

What is your stance on friends and friendship?

“I don't know you, so I'm not going to explain growing up with no friends. I don't exactly need them, but it was boring growing up with no one else. I'll admit I don't mind the others in the Aequales, as annoying as they can be. However, they are decent people I enjoy spending time with. Niri is pretty great, actually. Jazlyn still babies me, which is a little annoying, but I would be lying if I didn't admit she is someone I consider a friend. Robbie is a little annoying at times, but Akash keeps him in line. I wish Wade would do the same for Parker. I have no idea how it took until last September for Wade to punch him.”

How would you describe your relationship with your family?

“My parents are my parents. Why would I not respect them? I don't see them often, but I'm following what they want. I'm making them proud. I have a decent job. I'm contributing to Alium as a terrakinetic. They are proud of me. I don't want or need anything more than that.”

#2- Carla

If you could have one wish granted, what would it be? (No wishing for more wishes)

“I would like to bring my parents back. I'd like things to be normal again. Carmen to talk to me more. I'd like to know my cousin I never got to meet. Oh, sorry, this is more than one. Um... The war. Yeah, I'd wish the war never happened. No, wait, the cause of the war: the prejudice of Inutilia. I wish that never happened. I wish we could all get along. Then it would be good.”

What’s your favourite music?

“I really like the different cultural music of each of the Sectors - I have to say I love Sector 3's music the most. Stefanija Lauwers is also a Sector 8 singer I really love. But recently, Tyler has gotten me into a Ceteri genre called 'alternative rock.' I can't stop listening to it - I've never heard anything like it!”

What’s your number one warning sign that it is not going to be a good day?

“How I'm feeling once I've woken myself up all the way. My emotional state tells me how I'm gonna feel for most of the day. Sometimes I'm sad for no reason. And then that's a bad day. When George goes off to work and instead of getting something done, I just decide that I'm going to experience time as quickly as possible until I can get to when he comes back.”

More Carla: empty Bingo

#3- Parker

What’s your favourite snack?

“Me. Cause I'm a snack - hey-ooo! Come on, guys, I'm not gonna explain that joke to you. Honestly, whatever I'm hungry for in the moment. Changes day by day, hour by hour, minute by minute, second by second, nanosecond by nanosecond. Anyhow, I'd like some Cheetos.”

What do you least want to hear when you wake up in the morning?

“'Oh, my God, Parker, are you gonna sleep in all day?' No, Mom, I'm gonna get up when I want to. Also I don't want to hear 'Mrs. Holliday just emailed me about your attitude and conductivity problems.' Mom, the bitch hates me. Let me sleep, Goddamn.”

Do you have a nemesis? What are they like?

“Yeah, he got interviewed earlier. Gabriel hates me, and y'know what, he's a boring asshole. He's been a boring asshole for years. He's a stick in the mud, and he drives me insane. Jazlyn, my girl, best girl, my badass idol, likes him. How? Jaz, he's so boring! You're the least boring person I know! What, you knew him for a little longer so he's like a little brother for you? Do what everyone else does with their little brother: dropkick him. Light his hair on fire or something. I take back my last answer - the thing I least want to hear in the morning is Gabriel Medina's voice. Every single practice, he's like 'Cassidy, you're an idiot, Cassidy, you need to stop, Cassidy, you're too chaotic, Cassidy, listen to me.' Go shove a rock up your ass, Medina. Robbie and Akash think he's worthy of a cute silly nickname like Gills. How dare you. Why not nickname me? I'm much more fun than him.”

#4- Rose

What is your favorite beverage for a warm summer afternoon?

“I don't think I could consider myself a true Texan if I didn't say iced tea. Sorry if that's a lame answer.”

What is something that keeps you up at night?

“Insecurities. Hope that helps.”

If you could switch lives with any one you know who would it be and why?

“Lexi. Her family is great, she has so many friends, and...yeah. Lexi.”

More Rose: OC in three

#5- Alex

What’s your favourite flower?

“In Alium, there is no way that it's not the hahkosa blossoms. In Ceteri, purple asters, obviously. I am so predictable. Purple is just such a totally awesome color. I mean, no shade of purple is bad. Not a single one. Every other color? There's, like, one icky shade. Purple is just objectively the best color.”

Do you like parties? What kind?

“Uh, duh! I love parties! Who doesn't? I'll go to any kind of party. You could say I'm the life of it! I prefer going with friends, just because it makes it so much fun! Dances are awesome. Just vibing to the music with your besties. Cannot compare to anything else.”

Are you hiding anything from your friends (I promise the secret is safe with me)?

“Oh. Well, I guess that I'm not happy at all times. I try to be. I love making others happy. I feel like I may be abandoning what makes me, well, me. I'm happy. I'm Alex. She's the girl who is the life of the party, like I said. I can't be anxious! [Pause] haha, well, who am I kidding? This has been such a fun interview! Thank you!”

#6- Ewan

Is there someone that you look up to?

“Jazlyn, in both senses of the phrase. She's taller than me, but also, she's just...don't tell anyone this, but Jazlyn is the most important part of my life. She has this super confident demeanor, but she's actually reflective. More than she lets on. Not that she isn't confident. She's the kind of person who'd volunteer at a magic show. She sits in the front row every time. She's the smartest person I know. Sharp wit. Great at everything it seems. Blunt and harsh at times, but she is never rude. Badass at sparring. She's made me more willing to take risks and get out of my comfort zone! I can't imagine my life without her if she never approached me five years ago.... *clears throat* Oh my gosh I've been talking too long...”

Do you have any trouble falling/staying asleep?

“When I'm out, I'm way out. Cause I'm exhausted. But falling asleep? Man, my mind is on so many things. My next music composition, Jazlyn, what and how I'm gonna train Lexi, homework, band practice, Jazlyn, the manga I was just reading, wait--I said Jazlyn...*clears throat again* anyway my brain is so full at night.”

Do you believe in forgiveness?

“Oh, 100%. Not because I think the person is deserving, but I feel sick if I don't do it. I can't move on. Forgive. My life has other places it would like to be than in the past.”

TSP intro

Thanks for reading this far! I'll tag @finickyfelix @ohnomybreadsticks @winterandwords @jezifster @jay-avian @kyofsonder @lesleymoonwriter @leahnardo-da-veggie @cowboybrunch @elsie-writes @atelierwriting + anyone else!

Your questions:

Do you prefer working on one thing until it's finished or many things at a time?

You are in a talent show! What is your talent?

How do you feel about your birthday? Do you have a best or worst birthday?

TSP tag list (ask to be +/-): @thepeculiarbird @illarian-rambling @televisionjester @finchwrites

[sirensplayhouse]

hii it’s ‘🪦’ anon. i wanted to come back for a quick second and share some stuff. recently, i’ve manifested so much stuff since i first sent an ask and even before that with only being in this year for two months.

month of janurary in order:

- my parents divorce being over after years (everything working out how we planned). this was also the reason i had got into LOA all those years ago, so i did cry for like a day straight, it was really my wakeup call.

- 2 week vacation to my favorite tropical area for the month of feburary (i just got back from traveling and i enjoyed myself sm)

- i tapped into the void state about two times that month as well. i affirmed for always being aware of when i’m in it.

- a healthier relationship with my family. the past few years i did struggle with feeling close with them but we’ve grown so much in a short amount of time now.

- 300 dollars worth of clothes + a skims dress (the package was gonna be way more and i had already spent a lot of money for the vacation in advance)

- three new pairs of desired shoes

- this was random but, my mom always gives me money monthly to spend freely or to save but i had already gotten that months worth. so i was like my mom is gonna give me more money, not even 30 minutes later she’s asking how much i wanted?? 😭😭

month of feburary in order:

- over the years my family has definitely gotten more lenient especially since i’m damn near grown LMAO but it feels nice to do stuff without feeling like there’s going to be consequences, so i manifested for my family to be more lenient with my desired things.

- to get rid of my cold/flu a few days before vacation. i had gotten “sick” (like a common cough and runny nose) from a family member. i haven’t been sick in years so i was genuinely pissed about it. i affirmed one night when i was sleepy to wakeup without the sickness, and when i woke-up it was gone.

- my sister got paid earlier than she expected. and the amount was a few more thousands than she normally would get. it was funny when she came to tell me because she always has to make a joke out of everything. 😭

- my mothers approval for more piercings and maybe even a tattoo? (probably not, i’d def pussy out LMDAOO)

- so this was the biggest one besides the divorce but we got offers for two homes. the same homes that we looked at years ago and it honestly freaked me out. i genuinely did want to move again so i could be closer to my friends house to hangout more (we both met through LOA about three years ago and just so happened to live almost an hour away). i glanced at both house listings online after talking to her and i believed that i was gonna move. NEXT DAY, MY MOM AND SISTER GOT TWO CALLS BACK TO BACK. so now we’re moving into both homes because of something that happened 😭 it’s not bad but it was funny. i’ll be there in less than a week so i’m excited!

- another thing that happened was earlier this month. i tapped into the void for fun through this guided hypnosis video post made by gorgeouslypink and i was curious. i didn’t have any intent on manifesting anything there nor did i actually think i was gonna go through with it. i laid down right after and i tapped into it immediately while following the last speaking. personally, i don’t feel the need for the void because at the end of the day, ts is a deep meditative state inside of me. manifesting in the void is instant, and so is manifesting any other way. i also texted my friend right before and after. she thought i was gonna do it another day by u disappeared for like an hour or two and she was shocked. i was gonna send proof of everything but idk how to do this shit through anon but changing the font tbh this is sad.

all of the stuff that i mentioned within these two past months were all manifested without using the void. i hope that this can bring more positivity and enthusiasm for a lot of people who’ll see this post. ofc you can use the void but realize your power, it all starts with you and ends with you. don’t forget that you promised yourself these things so give them to yourself. sending love 💓 i’ll check back in monthly probably bc this is fun sharing my experiences and using the pink font color 💟 see you next time!

babes……. HELLO YOU DID THAT🥺i’m so proud and happy for you ! 🫶🏾 you’re only gonna get better and better and i can’t wait🥰i hope you enjoy all you’ve manifested 🕺🏾and have an absolute ball

[l-starlight-l]

The love of a Hero

Dinner for Two

Previous: part1 part2

A/n: I feel like this is silly but I really like seeing Jason in a way that he feels so comfortable and talkative yk! It’s not very comic Jason but it’s my Jason so it doesn’t matter, I hope you enjoy it!

Description: Jason and you open up to each other over some food

Pairing: Jason Todd x Reader

——————————————————————————

:reference:

——————————————————————————

You finished work a little earlier than usual and thought about taking the long way home through Gotham park. It was a scenic route back to your apartment that always cleared your head after a rough day. You had been in Gotham for two weeks and it was going very well. You had made some friends at work including a certain vigilante you spent breaks with, and some kind neighbors. Everyone always gave Gotham a bad wrap but this is the best place you’ve lived so far.

On your walk to the park you get a chilling feeling as if someone is watching you. You check behind you but there’s no one there. You speed up just to be safe. You can see the park a few feet ahead when you run into someone and almost fall to the ground. A large arm catches you, looking up you see a red helmet peering down at you.

“We have to stop meeting like this” he smirks pulling you up

You shake your head and dust yourself off. “You seem to always be in my way, you know” you tease with a smile.

“Maybe I do it on purpose” he winks at you even though you technically can’t see it.

“You’re such a flirt” you roll you eyes to play it off. “What are you even doing here”

“I just got off patrol” he takes off his helmet, “you hungry” he tries to be smooth and he is.

Your mind goes crazy at the thought of going out to eat with him, what if it’s a date. You block all your overthinking out. “I could eat” you say trying to hide your internal panic.

“Good I know the perfect place” he leads the way into the park and up to a food truck covered with fairy lights and stickers. There’s a few people there all enjoying their food, only giving a short glance at the red hood casually grabbing a bite to eat. “My brother use to take me here all the time, they have the best burgers in all of Gotham” he says proudly with a cute look on his face.

All you can do is stare at him. You’ve never seen him like this, you’ve known him for a week and a half but you only talked about work never about personal stuff. “I didn’t know you had a brother” you say a little quiet

“I have quite a few siblings, they all annoy me but they’re family you know” he says while you both get in line for the food. “What about you?” He looks down at you, waiting for an answer like a puppy.

“Well, I have brothers” you say suddenly shy, “and a cousin who’s like my sister, I get along with them fine but they can be so difficult sometimes” you laugh to yourself thinking about your brothers. You never talk about your family, it’s always been a messy topic but it feels good now.

“Do they live close? Is that why you moved here?” He seems so eager to know you it catches you a little off guard.

“Oh no, they would never live here my dad would kill them” you pause thinking about your dad, “I know my little brother is still in metropolis but I’m not sure about the older one” you sigh into the cold air.

“Are you not close with them?” You look up at him and he has a curious but concerned expression.

You shake your head, “not as close as I should be, but things happen you know it’s just how life is. I wish I could see them more often but it just doesn’t ever work out like that” you should feel sad or guilty, that’s how you usually feel when you talk about this sort of thing but you feel understood and heard.

“I get that, I mean I practically live with my siblings and we’re not super close. I want to have a sibling bond I just feel like to much of an outsider to join in now” he says honestly, he isn’t use to talking like this to people but you make him feel so comfortable.

“We’re not so different then” you say with a small nod. You’ve reached the window without even noticing, you quickly look over the menu while he is ordering. He pays even though you insist and insist you got it.

“This just means you’ll have to take me out again, doc” he winks at you while we grab our food. You roll your eyes and go sit on a nearby bench. We sit and eat in a kind but short silence. “I don’t know why I feel like I can be so honest with you, and tell you things I wouldn’t usually tell anybody” he admits after taking a bite of his burger.

“I tend to have that effect on people seeing as it’s my job” you joke but it feels different talking to him then it does talking to a patient. “Although I don’t open up to my patients like I do to you”.

He blushes a bit, it’s a hidden blush so you can’t tell. He wants you to feel the same way he does, so he doesn’t feel so silly for talking about his life. You spent another hour just talking and getting to know each other better. After he walks you home to your apartment, and you part ways for the night. You’ll probably see each other again very soon. Both of you have a feeling you can’t quite figure out, but you know that you like it.

——————————————————————————

[theweirdoinurhouse]

Phobias, am I right?

Sorry for the bad title, but in my Ted Talk of the day I'll be discussing Tokophobia and thanatophobia (mainly this one). I've seen some talk about them, and want to share my own personal experiences with them and spread more light on the subjects.

CW: Talk of death, pregnancy, childbirth, and rape (very briefly) Please proceed with caution, I don't want anybody to have a mental crisis

So first off, what are tokophobia and thanatophobia? Tokophobia is the fear of childbirth/pregnancy, and thanatophobia is the fear of death. That one is pretty broad. I will section off talking about each of them. Warning, they might be long.

Thanatophobia:

I'll just get this one out of the way. I personally have thanatophobia stronger than tokophobia, and that's because it's literally unavoidable. And that's the main reason I'm so scared of it. Unlike other fears like heights or spiders or snakes, you can decently avoid those. But you can't avoid death. It's always looming over you, no matter how safe you seem. Not to say those other fears aren't valid or anything. They absolutely are. But nobody can avoid death. Not forever anyways.

Everytime I get home and open the door I'm scared someone might be on the other side with a gun. Or when I enter my room. Or whenever I'm walking I wonder if that maybe someone will drive by and shoot me. Lots of shooting thoughts, because it's one of the easiest methods. But no matter where I am I always have the looming thought of dying.

Then there's the fact about mortality. It absolutely angers me. Inside me are two wolves (sorry I have to joke to make myself feel better). One wolf thinks: Why do anything? We won't matter. We won't do anything that matters to the world or people. We're gonna die one day. We're not special. Why try so hard? The other wolf thinks: We're gonna die one day, so why not live life to the fullest? (Can you tell which one I listen to most of the time?)

I try my best to live my life to the fullest. But I'm always so stressed about everything. Then whenever I try to do something "cool" or think about doing something cool, I can only think of how that might make my life even shorter. I watched this one movie where this girl was the embodiment of "YOLO". Guess what? She died.

I don't want that to be me. I don't want to finally decide to do something fun and then die. But I also don't want to stay cooped up my whole life. Every thought I have contradicts each other and it's so hard to live with. I hate thinking about how we're all just going to die one day and that we can't do anything about it. And we have no clue what's after.

I'm not religious. And honestly? That makes this even worse. I have nothing to hold onto. I have nothing to look forward to. I have nothing. 😋😋 I won't talk much about religion. Like ever. But yeah, I don't have a belief of what's after, and it's makes the unknown so scary to me. I don't like not knowing. Just endless black? No consciousness? Nothing? Nothing.

I have oh so many thoughts about death. None positive. Sometimes I think about killing myself to escape this sad, non-satisfying world. When I was younger I made this idea with my step dad that when you die you get your own island in the sky and you can make it as perfect to you as you want. Sometimes I want to die to go to my own personal, amazing life. But what if that's fake? What if everything everyone has ever thought of about the afterlife is fake? Not having an answer is scary enough for me.

Earlier today I was helping out at a theater put away some stuff. I was standing on top of a latter. Then suddenly it was getting a little hard to breath and I was crying. Had to steady myself before getting off the ladder. So really other fears that can correspond to death scares me too. How diverse! 😄

Anyways that's the basics. Ill just stop it there before it gets too long.

Tokophobia:

This one will be shorter, so people who don't like reading a lot of words: here ya go.

Remember in thanatophobia I mentioned walking? Yeah sometimes I think about someone 🍇 me and (bc the government low key sucks) being forced to have a child. TERRIFYING!!! Honestly props to all the moms in the world, i could never give birth.

Whenever I think about pregnancy the first thing that pops up in my brain is that one scene from Alien. You know the one. There is a literal LIVING BEING GROWING IN YOUR STOMACH!!! WHAT?!

The thought just really grosses me out, and I just would have a mental breakdown if I was pregnant.

This one time in like 3rd grade my teacher was talking about her giving birth to her two daughters (no clue why she did). She had to stop because one kid was crying, knees to their chest and rocking back and forth. That child was me. I was absolutely mortified of the idea of giving birth. Still am. People call it the beauty of life. I call it absolutely disgusting (no offense. Omg opinions!!)

Anyway yeah. In summary: I don't like the world ☺️☺️

(I did not re-read this, so sorry for any mistakes in spelling or grammar!)

[doodle17]

Just got back from the fnaf movie

!!SPOILERS SPOILERS SPOILERS!! TRUST ME THIS MOVIE IS SOOO WORTH WATCHING WITHOUT SPOILERS JUST HOLD OUT A LITTLE LONGER I BELIEVE IN YOU

Please remember if you reblog go tag with every fnaf spoiler tag you can think of btw!

Anyways

This

Movie

Was so... godamn...

GOOOD!!!!!!!!

DUDE, I KID YOU NOT THIS MOVIE FUFILLED EVERY SINGLE ONE OF 10 YEAR OLD ME'S EXPECTATIONS AND DREAMS AND IT FILLED MY CURRENT ONES TOO

You guys it was just- AHGAYAGAHWHOWWHOSBSOANALENSLSN

First of all: absolutely loved how it wasn't overly violent. I'm not a prude, but when it comes to gore and violence, I'm very particular. Everyone who follows me knows I'm not a fan of gore, and luckily this movie had none!

It was still pretty gruesome. Like the guy getting his face eaten by Mr. Cupcake and that one girl who got bitten in half by Freddy. But even then, all you could see was the silhouette and her lower half fall to the floor. And 90% of the other scenes you do see, but they kind of let the sounds of what's happening fill in the gaps as the camera goes somewhere else, like with Mr. Cupcake.

Even when you see their bodies later on in the parts and services, the end results of what happened earlier aren't even that bad! Tbh it's almost too dark to even see anything

I loved that! It made it perfectly fine for me to watch and not squirm uncomfortably or feel sick. It actually shocked me! Most gore just makes me roll my eyes and want to gag but this stuff literally made me say "WOAH that's MESSED UP" (enthusiastically) out loud a few times!

Also the parts with the animatronics playing with Abby.... GOD that really filled a void in me that I never knew I had... Watching them play and build a fort and be goofy... Really made me smile so hard!... Uh, as if they didn't kill a bunch of dudes earlier.... Hmm..

All the little references made me point at the screen and squeal! That MatPat cameo my goodness! It made me laugh too lol, which I was pretty surprised about! I wasn't expecting to laugh, smile and cry in a scary movie but here we are!

Every Balloon Boy jumpscare got me, because even though it was, as all those video game critics say, "a cheap spook with a loud noise" I can guarantee a lot of other people did too

AND FELLAS WE GOT IT!!! SPRINGLOCK FAILURE BABYYYYY!!!

I think I was pretty pleased with how they did the springlocks. The reveal... The way Abby said "They can see you now." As they turn to William... Their real Killer... HOT DAMNNNNN AND THEN HE SAYS THE FUCKING LINE AND PUTS ON THE HEAD JUST- CHILLS DUDE (I should probably mention how loud this movie made me btw)

And that part legitimately made my eyes water too! When they dragged him away, the music and him twitching... All I could think was "JUSTICE!"

And I love that they made William a horrible father from what we saw when he talked with Vanessa. It always irks me the wrong way when people try to portray him as a sad parent who lost his daughter and that's why he did what he did. Like- no. He wasn't okay in the head you guys, he was NOT a good father, EVER. I'm sorry but no, he literally neglected, emotionally, and possibly, physically abused his kids.

And I love what they did with characters too! I like how the movie just did its own thing that to me, felt like What fnaf REALLY is.

I never like fnaf lore as it is now. I like when the premise was simply: "guy kills kids, hides their bodies in suits, ghosts posses the animatronics, and want to take revenge but don't remember their killer, so they kill anyone they think is him." Before all that sci-fi stuff got involved. And the Movie is just that! "guy kills kids, hides their bodies in suits, ghosts posses the animatronics, and want to take revenge but don't remember their killer, so they kill anyone they think is him."!! It was awesome!

And I like how it explains that there's the possibility that while the kids posses them, they also have somewhat minds of their own. At least that's what I got from some stuff revealed. There's ways been a part of me that thought the animtronics themselves had minds of their own, so to see that it could be a possibility (in the movies canon at least) was really cool!

Also... Living tombstone fnaf 1 song :) in end credits!

And to end this off, sadly there wasn't a post credit scene sadly (unless you count that CoryxKensin getting jumpscared by the BB toy after the fancy credits)

But!!!! Did anyone else notice the fnaf 2 music box playing in the end credits? And the one noise that says the letters and stuff during the secret fnaf 2 minigames...?

I mean, Matthew did say he signed for 2 more movies... So who's to say we won't get a Fnaf 2 movie based off the evidence of what we heard there, huh? Just a little thought I decided to leave here before we end things off :)

FORGOT TO MENTION that both me and Cherri SCREAMED the lyrics for the fnaf song at the end lol,and two girls next to us started recording us lol (not in a mean way we all talked and ranted for a good 3 minutes afterward it was fun!)

[lususnatura]

How does your muse sit? Do they take up space, or keep to themselves?

AHH, before i say anything else, first let me say: thank you for sending me this ask! it always makes me so happy whenever i see people send me stuff :) and honestly, i feel like this is an interesting question because the way i see it, the manner in which a character carries themselves alone could say a LOT about them, i'm not gonna lie. so i am glad you asked!! and now, allow me to give you the best answer i can in relation to this: blamore does absolutely take up space whenever it sits somewhere, and i think that a big part of why this is partially due to perhaps confidence that is a little performative on it's part, BUT that is also genuine as well.

and i know that that might not make complete sense without context because i myself think that my method of explaining things sometimes can be confusing LOL. though, i promise that i'll explain what i mean in a second. this is something that i've only briefly touched upon in both blamore's carrd and in an earlier post on here thus far + as such, i'm going to talk about it more in depth here, but even before it's transformation — blamore was someone with a 'big' personality and this sort-of showed through him seeming to be full of confidence as well as being quote spontaneous, especially for someone who seemed to have such a laid-back father. it's also important to know that blamore's father was also very supportive of it, however, though he felt like he couldn't express who he really was while he was still in annecy with thérèse. for, as you may be familiar with, thérèse was... well, there's really no other way to put it besides that she was abusive and as a result, blamore felt like he always had to be walking on eggshells around her.

this is done in order to try to prevent or minimize any future occurrences of upsetting the abuser. but unfortunately, this rarely works and when it does, it's only temporary. and so for a while, blamore had lost his sense of self because he basically conditioned himself to only focus on what was happening outside of himself. and as a result, he had stopped listening to his inner voice for a while as a child, which is not a good thing but blamore viewed it as the only way he could possibly survive around her without completely breaking down so one can understand why he did it. it is also a common occurrence with those who have been abused, and although sacha (blamore's father) had tried to help his child heal from all of the psychological / emotional trauma that it endured at the hands of it's mother (which was made unknown to him by thérèse until he found her physically lashing out at him) with therapy as well as much positive reinforcement from him as possible that he could be the person he wants to be without having to fear that he'd be punished or ridiculed for it... there is still a part of it that is affected by the psychological abuse that was inflicted on it as a kid.

because it has made him chronically angry and self-tortured deep down inside, so although his true personality HAS been allowed to flourish in the years that proceeded sacha and its move to gotham, sometimes blamore falls into what he considers to be a 'bad habit' and be at least somewhat insecure about his identity / personality. so, yeah, although blamore usually always appears to be a very 'loud and proud' person on the outside that let's everyone know that he exists by completely sprawling out or just sitting in positions that call attention to him in general whenever he sits somewhere + gives them this idea that he's not going to let ANYONE make him feel like he can't take up space? sometimes, he feels like he's a kid all over again and one who doesn't know who he is.

and i can't lie, it is really sad. not to mention that it took blamore a while just to become even halfway comfortable in his skin the way it is now because, as far as medical doctors like nico morselli are concerned, it's downright PUZZLING that he's still alive with the way he is now and to suddenly be thrust into being dehumanized by so many people was... very disorienting for blamore, to say the least. but he's tried his best to turn this dehumanization on its head by trying to embrace that he's something else other than just human now. but yeah, i know this was a bittt long, but thank you very much for the ask again! and i hope you're having a GREAT morning thus far :)

[cult-of-the-eye]

Tell me your Criminal Minds thoughts! (please if your still gripped by it) <3

oh boy being gripped by it is an understatement

get ready folks

ok so when i first started it i was hesitant cause like i was coming out of a bad time and i was like i need something new to focus on but i'm not sure if this'll make me feel worse or better but i'd heard good things about it and some stuff about people thirsting over a skinny autistic white guy and then i started it and i was GRIPPED ok i should've known it would join my list of hyperfixations cause i'm such a sucker for found family going through horrific things partly cause they're trying to solve things in their own past and this is pretty much exactly that but more on the angst than fluff side

anyway on to the characters my beloved <33333

Gideon

i am SUCH a slut for this kinda character like renowned kinda eccentric genius forced away from his field after a traumatic event then coming back to that field

and gideon oh man he was so fucking cool i loved that guy

he was literally everyone's dad i just-

the whole elle calling gideon dad storyline made me giggle

i was so sad that he retired but you know what i'm glad cause the poor guy deserved a fucking BREAK

he's just so iconic, like him being spencer's father figure, him screaming bloody murder in that one house to show it was sound proofed or whatever, him telling elle not to call him dad, him sharing the orange with his coworkers, him going beserk over the one child that got kidnapped and literally BUSTING into the kidnapper's house and he's always so gentle with the kids and it's so fucking sweet, him and his little cabin this man deserves so much rest i love him

in my head he is happily fishing in a cabin somewhere

Elle!!!!

I LOVE HER I LOVE HER I FUCKING LOVE HER

she is so fucking underrated man

she's just so COOL and like she's introduced as like this ambitious smart badass FBI agent but she's also so insanely caring about the female victims

like she acknowledges how difficult it is to be a female in that position and also keep sane having seen all that shit happen to the female victims

i really fell i love with her during one of the earlier episodes where she's talking to a rape victim and she sees that she's uncomfortable and takes her away from the men to give her some space and the opportunity to talk to a woman i just

she's so fucking fierce and loving and i would do ANYTHING for her

my girl did NOTHING wrong

all the shit that went down in the fisher king i will never get over that, like she could've been furious at any of the team and blamed them for what happened to her but she didn't

it's wild to me that the best criminal profilers in the US couldn't see that elle desperately needed help

i will always remember the time she opens up to reid about how she can still feel the guy's fingers inside her bullet wound and i just AH she needed the compassion that she usually provided but she didn't get that and so she broke

i am a fierce defender of elle greenaway i love that woman and i was DEVASTATED when she left i cannot believe we only got 3 seasons of her

(she's also hot)

Hotch

oh man i have so many thoughts about this man but i can't properly articulate any of them

first of all, smash.

now we've gotten past that, i'm such a sucker for grumpy caretaker characters who barely smiles but when he does it's wonderful and meaningful

he knows his team and it fucking shows i just love this guy so much

i was so sad when hailey divorced him, i thought he was gonna be the one guy with the semi healthy family life but guess not

although i understand why she did, they needed different things than each other

the part that really made me go feral was when he was talking to that one serial killer and he was like some people who were horrifically abused grow up to kill and torture others but others grow up to catch them

i was like OH FUCK that resonates, vowing to never do what was done to you and stop others from ever feeling the same way you did

but then they did nothing with that storyline which was a little disappointing but i did like it

also he's a father

Spencer

i went into this only knowing about the hype for this guy and boy do i understand it

i am not into men but i would make an exception for this man right here

something about his autistic transmasc puppy dog swag has captivated me

the fact that he is autistic and comfortable letting the mask up a little around these people and!! they still!!! love him!!! it just makes me so fucking happy

like if he can do a job where his skills are seen as insanely useful and it's a part of him that's loveable then maybe i can too!!

he's so cute this skrunkly little white guy i don't really have the words to explain i want to throw him against a wall and then feed him soup

they always put these ones through the most trauma i feel

but we do love to see it

like break pretty boy break!

JJ

gorgeous gorgeous girly i love her

she's so funny and confident and sweet and smart and like what even else is there to say she's literally just everything

Morgan

i LOVE morgan with all my heart

like he's the older brother of the team, his friendship with literally everyone is everything to me

the way he calls reid pretty boy and teases him and his whole platonic soulmate ship with garcia (i don't ship them personally i see them as absolute besties) and his general just charming, funny, likeable demeanour

and then we get hit by the episode where he reveals that he was molested as a kid

i didn't cry but i got extremely close

it's always those ones who have the most devastating backstories

his whole speech about how he was the one who got himself out of chicago, not his abuser, he did that all by himself oh man

that was a punch in the gut.

i love him <3

Garcia

she is an ICON she is The MOMENT she is EVERYTHING

i fucking love her i would kill for her

her personality seeps into EVERYTHING man she is just so unabashedly herself and it's so fucking wonderful to see

she's quirky and upbeat amongst all the horror and its so fucking refreshing i am so in love with her confidence especially as a mid size person myself

she's so sweet she's literally everyone's best friend her energy is so infectious ahhhhhh love her <3

Prentiss

i saved my fave for last :)

at first i was like she will never replace elle i don't trust her but then she didn't replace elle, she was awesome in her own way

first of all. SMASH. she's so insanely hot i would die for her

her voice, her eyes, her hair, her personality oh my god

she's just so fucking driven and compassionate and has her dry humour that makes me so insane about her

i have no words

she's just everything to me

yeah ok. thanks for asking!!! writing this absolutely cheered me up after a bad day :)

[x-authorship-x]

Sadly, family fics with them are a bit thin on the ground these days. With how pervasive Qui-Gon bashing has become, it's a lot harder to find fics with him that don't feature it and I mostly have given up trying. I'm usually fine with fics that are a bit judgemental, because he is a flawed man, but I can't read things where he's mean and heartless anymore after reading the books. There still are some fics with good family feelings on ao3 though! If you'd like a rec, off the top of my head I can think of the One Hundred Hours To Rearrange The Stars series by soft_but_gremlin, and the Reprise series by Elfpen, both of which feature time travel and handle Qui-Gon and Obi-Wan (both older and younger) well. I think they'd be up your alley.

Obi-Wan's willful nature gets him into trouble just as often as it gets him out of it, and he really does just have absolutely bonkers luck. Him going off alone to do something always ends with either a really lucky find or him in peril, though often both one right after the other.

(Yeah, the Melida/Daan arc - which is where Obi-Wan does that - drives me up the wall, and not in any of the ways I expected going into it. No joke, I went into those books thinking I'd be pissed as all hell at Qui-Gon, and instead came out of them hating Nield, being incredibly frustrated with Obi-Wan, and thinking that Qui-Gon was pretty much the only person in book 5 who was even remotely reasonable for like 90% of it. I could talk about it for literal hours, because oh my god. They're good books, but it was seriously a head trip to read them after only being exposed to the fanfics, because they're vastly different. I won't go into it or we'd be here all day, but it's a lot more complex than the very black and white take that a lot fandom gives it credit for.)

Wait what, how did I miss you talking about that?! An Inoichi and Shisui master-padawan fic would be so, so good, oh my god. I tried to go back to find anything you had on it, but Tumblr's search function is garbage so I didn't find anything. Which is so sad, please tell me more I want to know about baby padawan Shisui being gently parented by jedi master Inoichi 🥺

I'm glad to know my infodump was well received! I was a little nervous when I woke up and realized I had actually sent it, since I did kinda hit you with it out of nowhere and it is a pretty unpopular opinion these days, so it was a big relief when you didn't seem to mind!

Yo!

Well I'm not surprised either tbh, people love drama in their fics , they love Obi-wan (guilty as charged), and most fics need someone to come down on as the bad guy, so yeah I can absolutely see the fandom skewing that way... also thank you, I appreciate recs, I'll be sure to check them out! ☺️

(also I'm on board with the 'shut up omg neild' train, although you're also right that I've not read the books but just... osmosed the info but oh well)

Ahhh Tumblr is so goddamn broken, I tried to find my own prompt drabbles earlier and... no luck 🙃 more than happy to chat (or rediscuss) stuff tho :)

So I'd like to avoid the inevitable pitfalls of just applying the SWs universe to the Naruto characters and plotline (I'm just... not in the mood for the danzo/suicide/itachi arc, again) and focus on extracting just Inoichi and Shisui into SW plot etc. A cleaner cut that's not too heavy with two series' worth of plot.

So it would be something like... Inoichi is from a mid-rim planet, somewhere metropolitan, he presented a very strong telepathic skill with the force as a child so he was sent to the Jedi. Started training as a healer, using his mental strength to soothe others and the growing darkness, BUT then he found himself (as many Jedi do) called by the force out into the wider galaxy... to the edge of wild space. There, he finds a planet where there is a clan of people who are the only force sensitives on the planet, the Uchiha, who the government have turned against by fear of their abilities and of a coup. The Uchiha are in the middle of being massacred when Inoichi arrives, finds a six year old Shisui running for his life, and intervenes. Inoichi saves him and they run for Inoichi's ship, massively outnumbered and barely make it.

Magic Item Found: Adorable Child

Achievement Unlocked: Single Parenthood!

At the temple, inoichi is a very strong presence in Shisui's life in the creche and has taken a full-time role as a mind healer (to be around all the time lol) but they are both conscious that shisui is monitored for any taint of 'darkness' from his experiences - and the darker use of the force that the Uchiha were known for. Inoichi is more concerned with Shisui's well-being and his own lack of experience with children. Shisui is very worried about not being perfect and not internalising the Jedi code (gonna go freestyle interp on this one) enough to avoid attachment. Cue inoichi teaching himself to be a young father and shisui punishing himself with so much training and emotional pining that the crechmaster is concerned he'll be aging out of initiate classes by the time he's 10. Inoichi takes shisui as his Padawan as soon as possible (inoichi is like "my son 🥹" but not pushing too hard whilst shisui is like "I need to make him proud and that includes not being a burden🥹") and somehow (but also reaaaaaaally NOT surprising) they are the most emotionally intelligent master padawan duo DESPITE the huge hiccup in communication 😂

Inoichi: I will parent him SO WELL that he will be strong enough to live a long and fulfilling life, even when I am gone... Damn I love this kid :') (small but nagging concern for his flagrant attachment but knows it's healthy and human so weighs more on his shrink BG than ancient Jedi teaching... this is not popular but YOU try fighting with a doctor)

Shisui: I have to talk about my feelings, even though I'll be careful to avoid coming on too strong .. I WILL NOT get a bad grade in Padawan *proceeds to be the most loving and precious child possible, selfless and clever and loyal to such a degree that he's able to help others as well*

😂🤦

Inoichi is about, hm, 35? And Shisui is 20 (so Inoichi found Shisui, 6, when he was 21) which means... Inoichi is crechmates with Obi-wan and Quinlan :))))) and Shisui knows Anakin and Aayla

(*Fix It Fic clown music intensifying*)

I think the best way to transform canon from that point on is the simple acknowledgement that Shisui would be a Shadow. With the Uchiha's use of force manipulation plus Inoichi's own teaching in telepathy and empathetic communication AND Shisui's own incredible speed... Shisui would be ideal for scouting. Which means he would be the one getting intelligence that informs the GARs missions. And he can pick up on the bullshit faulty info that's doctored to kill the clones/Jedi and extend the war and be like... hold the phone lads this is a conspiracy :3

I just want a scene where the kids are like 14/15/16 (respectively) and coming back from rebellious teen speeder racing and Anakin is like "obi wan is gonna ground me again for being out past bedtime 😒" and shisui is like "sucks to be you bro inoichi actively bets on me winning✨" and Aayla is like "you also have a bedtime 🙄" to which Shisui is like "...😬 ok point" and really Aayla is the only one unphased because Quinlan is like OMG MY LIL PADAWAN WAS OUT LIVING WILD 🥹 IM SO PROUD

Also I reaaaaaaaaaaally want Shisui to do the force equivalent of a Shunshin in a battlefield (maybe he's hunting Ventress?) And just... BAMF wows everyone and it's so beautiful and then he's like ✨☺️✨ the SUN with his CURLS and his DIMPLES and 🤌🤌🤌🤌🤌 and suddenly Anakin (who's been getting more sullen) starts to brighten up again, like the clouds receding, and Obi-wan is also relaxing a little because these days seeing Shisui means it won't be long until- and there, that's when Inoichi arrives (at a much more reasonable pace) with their Intell Corps and the 501st and 212th are introduced to the wonder of Jedi therapy (also those two would 100% be the ones who find the chips)

ANYWAY

I hope you enjoy MY infodump lmaoooo I got carried away but oh well~

That's quite alright, I like when people use my askbox and it was a surprise but a positive one, I hadn't expected a SW ask and especially not one about Qui-gon haha... I'm not phased by 'unpopular' opinions, I'm sure I've more than a few that my followers don't care for! 😉 for what it's worth, I hope you're reassured if you decide to send me any more asks :)

Anyway, I've rambled a lot here but thanks for reaching out again, it was super interesting~ have a nice day/night, Anon ✨