#i also miss very
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lead balloon (the tumblr post that saved me)
if this comic resonated with you, it would mean the world to me if you donated to this palestinian family's escape fund.
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no creative notes because this isn't that kind of comic.
I know I don’t owe any of you anything but I still felt compelled to write about my long term absence. And I feel far enough away from the dangerous spot I was in to be able to make this comic. I have a therapist now, and she agreed that making this could be a very cathartic gesture, and the start of properly leaving these thoughts behind me. I am still, at seemingly random times, blindsided by fleeting desires to kill myself. They’re always passing urges, but it’s disarming, and uncomfortable. I worry sometimes that my brain’s spent so long thinking only about suicide that it’s forgotten how to think about anything else. Like, now that I've opened that door for myself, I'll never be able to fully shut it again. But I’m trying my best to encourage my mind in other directions. We'll see how that goes.
I am still donating all proceeds from my store to Palestinian causes. So far, I've donated over $15K, not including donations coming from my own pocket or the fundraising streams which jointly raised around $10K. In the time since I made my initial post about where this money would be going, the focus has shifted from aid organisations to directly donating to escape funds.
If you'd like to do the same, you can look at Operation Olive Branch, which hosts hundreds of Palestinian escape funds or donate to Safebow, which has helped facilitate the safe crossing and securing of important medical procedures for over 150 at-risk palestinians since the beginning of the genocide.
#cw: suicidal ideation#cw: suicide#cw: self harm#cw: mental health#cw: depression#i made the balloon the main representation of my self destructive urges for a reason but im not going to explain it#i tried to keep a lot of the details in this vague#it would be my worst nightmare if this comic encouraged someone to hurt themselves#so. please dont#for a long time even the thought of making this comic felt so insipid and narcissistic#with the state of the world as it is#having the only threat to your life be yourself felt so privileged and trite and shameful#but doing this comic made me sit down and process things in full#and im just. very grateful i didn't give in to my thoughts back when i sincerely felt i'd be more useful to the world dead#i also feel the need to say that this wont represent everyone's battle with mental illness. its unfortunately different for all of us#there is no fix-all#and im afraid this might be one of those comics that either resonates a lot or misses the target by a mile#i made it for myself foremost. and now that its done im glad i did it#thank you for reading#and please stay alive#stillindigo art#stillindigo comics
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couldnt draw my thang for mid-autumn so treated myself to a calne redesign instead
#calne ca#hatsune miku#VOCALOID#cw: body horror#<- And I Fucking Mean That We Are Not Fucking Around Today#well we are. as in I drew this as a fuckaround treat for myself#but the body horror tag is the most warranted its ever been on this blog#ask to tag#I am as ever on my journey to make calne ca Worse. her OG version is too cool. even the crab ver is too cool#I need her to be worse to look at. I am also getting myself into to mood to test my hand at boarding a pmv for my friend's cover#I think my thought for this was ''I should try and give her a more insectoid bodyplan''#which in this mostly means gently three-part body and six limbs (my favourite amount of limbs to draw rn)#actually almost gave her eight but didnt like how that silhouette came out so I mermaided her uh. abdomen I guess#though maybe next time I do this I should push that idea more. the head and torso are still very distinct for one unified part#I feel like one of my old attempts was onto something with like. a more horizontal body plan... well! live and learn etc#happy late mid autumn I guess. I should play with touys about it... I miss model kits. mayhaps...
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if we could stay connected, just like this
#ok last orbit niigo post im emubrained again and also i miss leoneed#project sekai#pjsk#prsk#mizuki5 spoilers#proseka#mizuki akiyama#mizu5#nightcord at 25:00#hurray !#meltdown released an amazing translation of the event so i read it and had my final cathartic transgender cry about it#and now i have ~4 assignments due on friday so i have to stop drawing mizuki. sad.#i recommend everyone watch meltdown's translation#please. its very good and better than the mtls floating around#i Get why people wanted to see it translated asap like i Get it i didnt understand half of the wordplay or kanji but like . wah#its so crazy how this event breached containment n how many people are rooting for mizuki even tho they dont play the game so i just#think its a shame that the translation everyones reading isnt really accurate/lacks the nuances.. Ok sorrynits a good event.#ive just been thinking abiut that for a few days and i love talking in tags. Adios#real Orbit heads will know this is an Heartorbit reference (that tarot card sketch i did almost 2 years ago and said i would finish)#(i havent finished shit)
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splat 2 sketch comic for the starving agent 4 fans (me)
#clarifying right here right now NONE of this is shipping#pls dont interpret any of this as shipping#anyway i think people dont explore marie and agent 4's dynamic enough#marie is shown to be very caring and I hc agent 4 remind her a lot of callie once they open up to marie#so naturally marie is going to be doting as fuck towards this kid#implied angst of marie missing her cousin and seeing her in agent 4#my art#splatoon 2#splatoon#agent 4#marie splatoon#callie splatoon#also splatoon 2 storymode is more irrelevant now than Ever so this is kinda bad timing lmao
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I think the new memories that are being made come to the future stans in their dreams
#they can sort of communicate through them too#but it’s hit or miss what sticks like real memories or dreams#I have had people theorise that the little stans aren’t from the past but from a different dimension that’s only very slightly different#which I also love I think that’s so cool#my art#gravity falls#twins in time au#Stanford pines#ford pines#Stan pines#Stanley pines
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Tragic: Guy you based your entire villain backstory on doesn't even remember you
#art#comic#sonic the hedgehog#sth#shadow the hedgehog#infinite the jackal#sonic fanart#sonic#sonic forces#My funny BTS on this comic is Shadow's initial response was 'sounds like cope but okay' but I wanted something less internet-pilled LOL#I've drawn more Sonic Forces fanart than I intended but it is EXCLUSIVELY because I think Infinite is SO funny#I'm gonna shove him in a locker#Bro lost a fight once and it shattered his self esteem#He's been practicing his evil laugh for months and when he finally gets his chance Shadow hits him with the 'I don't know you'#Also since this is taking off I want to clarify: I am a hater in the silly sense. I understand why Infinite has fans#The bones of a good character are there it’s just the writing of this game failed him So Bad#Forces is my least fave Sonic game but I can’t stop thinking about it because of its missed potential#Forces tries to make a lot of very serious plot points but the impact is just not there. It becomes unintentionally funny as a result
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my campaign hiatus has gone on for too long so to cope ive combined my interests at their maximum potency and had some dnd-strawhats thoughts
thoughts in depth under read more... :)!
this is SO self indulgent. their designs literally did not change. but i am a firm believer that dnd doesnt have to be european high fantasy. and also one piece literally IS fantasy. no changes are necessary to fit into dnd. ive already imagined plenty of campaign/oneshot ideas inspired by one piece. so this was basically just an exercise of trying to replicate their canon abilities in dnd 5e as much as possible without totally homebrewing everything. well. aside from luffy. you just cant take away or change his stretching.
LUFFY: (human monk. drunken master subclass. outlander)
the only plain human of the crew to balance out with the fact that he still has rubber powers. obviously a monk. but drunken master subclass specifically because i think the flavor(not the fact that its about being a drunkard) and abilities both fit him really well. this line in the subclass' flavortext especially fits him: "A drunken master often enjoys playing the fool to bring gladness to the despondent or to demonstrate humility to the arrogant, but when battle is joined, the drunken master can be a maddening, masterful foe."
ZORO: (tiefling fighter. samurai subclass. bounty hunter)
a fighter with the samurai subclass is so very incredibly obvious... but i actually had a lot of fun geeking out while comparing the abilities to what he can do in canon; Fighting Spirit, Rapid Strike, and Strength Before Death especially! tiefling is also pretty on the nose for his demon pirate hunter shtick and asura form, but i thought he'd be really human-passing for a tiefling and theorized about his tail getting cut off at some point or another before joining the strawhats. initially wasnt gonna give him a feat, but i gave sanji a feat so i thought itd be unfair to not give him one as well, so sentinel fits the bill pretty well i think!
NAMI: (tabaxi rogue. arcane trickster subclass. criminal)
cat burglar -> full grown literal humanoid cat. this one is INCREDIBLY self indulgent... i love... cats... theres nothing deeper to this and no other reasoning. i took cat burglar and ran with it. can you tell that i love izutsumi dungeon meshi? rogue for the aforementioned burglar-ing as well, and the arcane trickster subclass for when she picks up climatact! the mage hand will be very useful for her pickpocketing. in the future as she levels up with timeskip, i can totally see her multiclassing into wizard as well! weather wizard!
USOPP: (lightfoot halfling artificer. artillerist subclass. urchin)
I HAD SO MUCH FUN THINKING ABOUT HIS CHARACTER SHEET. halfling's Naturally Stealthy ability lets him hide behind his crewmates since theyre (almost) all bigger than him, so its perfect for hiding behind zoro or sanji all the time. Lucky is also perfect for him, and I think Brave fits pretty well too when he puts on the sogeking mask. artillerist artificer is also very fun! tinkering and making magic items for his crew, and i think Eldritch Canon or Arcane Firearm could both be easily reflavored as kabuto or any of his inventions. for emphasizing his sniper-ness, the spell sniper feat was also necessary. i think hes my favorite of all the concepts. big ears and long nose combo is so cute to me.
SANJI: (half-elf monk. drunken master subclass. guild artisan (cook!))
race was mostly based on vibes i wont lie. squints. and that vinsmoke balogna or whatever too ig. but mostly vibes. along with the idea that i think a dwarf zeff raising him would be really funny and cute. monk is also obvious, and same subclass as luffy for mostly the same reasons. though the flavor fits him much less, i think the abilities still fit him perfectly, and this blurb specifically; "Your martial arts technique mixes combat training with the precision of a dancer." i really wanted to give him a different subclass from luffy, but i dislike all the other monk subclasses a lot and i found none of them fit him as well anyways, so to try and give them SOME differences, i gave him the crusher feat.
CHOPPER: (awakened deer(shifter statblock) cleric. life subclass. hermit)
this ones definitely a mouthful im sorry. awakened deer for obvious reasons, but due to magic instead of devil fruit stuff. when i was struggling with his race, i looked a lot at shifter because of his forms, but it occurred to me that itd be super cool if he could shift between all of the different shifter options instead of being stuck with just one to replicate his rumble balls. something like heavy point/guard point=beasthide, horn point/arm point(?maybe?)=longtooth, walk point/jumping point=swiftstride, and brain point=wildhunt. hed definitely need some kind of nerf though to balance out that homebrew... and cleric for class. duh.
ROBIN: (high elf wizard. order of scribes subclass. criminal)
robin is definitely the one i struggled the most with just because of her class. elf came pretty easily- shes very elegant and i think shed look cute with super long ears- and i landed on high elf instead of wood elf for the int-based abilities. i was really on the fence between sorcerer and wizard for her because i knew shed be a full spellcaster, but i didnt feel that any of the subclasses really fit her. i ended up going with wizard for order of the scribes since it focuses on texts and knowing everything. but also because robin with a flying talking sentient book would be crazy cool. it could also be similar to how she spawns mouths and eyes places to talk to or watch people. my "fuck it, why not. this would be rad. its my house" mindset kicked in with her i will admit. also the One with the Word ability made me cackle out loud when i read it. thats the funniest ability ever. anyways, i cant really think of a way to replicate her powers, but maybe we could just reflavor a bunch of spells to be her limbs or clutch; hold person, maximillian's earthen grasp, or evard's black tentacles. thatd probably work okay, and theres a handful of spells to replicate her ability to spawn eyes or mouths. unrelated, but i imagine nico olvia to be a drow. why? her hair is white. i am a simple man!
#had a full on fixation explosion with this one Dont even look at me im posting this at 4am for a reason.#I HAD FUN THATS ALL THAT MATTERS. I MISS DND SO BAD. CAMPAIGN HIATUS OVER SOON. I MUST LIVE#not really like an au or redesign or whatever but i wanted to draw a lineup anyways to show just. very miniscule differences#i guess. mostly an excuse just to draw a lineup of the strawhats. i fucknig guess#will probably do a part 2 cause i have more thoughts; franky+brook+ace+vivi are on the menu boys#its bothering me so much that usopp and nami are both orange in the read more. but there is no yellow text-fill on tumblr. sad#also just fist fought this post in the drafts for an hour bc i dont understand the character limit#so if i fucked this up im moving to the mountains#wtf... art#one piece fanart#dnd#dnd 5e#mugiwara crew#straw hat pirates#monkey d luffy#luffy#roronoa zoro#zoro#cat burglar nami#nami#usopp#black leg sanji#sanji#tony tony chopper#nico robin#dndpiece
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I just realized it'll take the eng server almost a year to reach the 3D Cheka T pose model :' ) we're at book 7 part 6, and we get a new main story update every 2 to 3 months..
Anyway, do you wanna share some fun, spoiler-free shenanigans that happened in jp's server.? Just to have some crumbs to lick off the table until we get our own sandwich (my heart is empty and my soul is crying)
spoiler-free is pretty hard, especially considering. the, uhhh, particular turn that things take directly after 6. (like, the fact that the other characters are showing up probably counts on its own?) and I do think that if you can avoid getting spoiled, most of it is definitely better as a surprise! some of the genuinely best Twst moments are waiting for you. :D
if I may, however, present one of my favorite little throwaway bits with absolutely no context:
#art#twisted wonderland#twisted wonderland spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 spoilers#twisted wonderland episode 7 part 10 spoilers#twisted wonderland book 7 part 10 spoilers#i've been thinking about 10 in particular lately. idk.#been sort of obsessed with the fact that azul calls his parents mama and papa#maybe it was only in the dream but i choose to believe this is just true of him because it's adorable#nothing more delightful than azul getting harassed by the twins and impotently shrieking about how his papa is a LAWYER he'll SUE them!!!!#azul your papa is a divorce attorney#i'm not sure he's ready to take on the literal ocean mafia#geeze though. y'all on eng have my deepest sympathies.#i have a hard enough time waiting between parts#(7-12 is coming for us next week and i'm already DYING of impatience 😭)#i cannot imagine also trying to dodge all the spoilers like a master thief in a hallway of laser beams#you all are stronger than i will ever be#that said i am VERY much enjoying vicariously reliving 6 via my activity page#rip meleanor...how i miss you...#man. i gotta draw more meleanor.#(to be fair this is true of me at any given moment)
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I see you, you see me. How pleasant, this feeling.
#song is after dark by mr kitty#my art#jojos bizarre adventure#jjba#jotakak#noritaro#noriaki kakyoin#jotaro kujo#mullet and piercings jotaro u think ur cool#i wanted this to feel very moody#ask me abt my jotakak headcanons :) i am very opinionated#jotaro called kakyoin ok he misses him. hes updating him on the teenagers#also theyre talking about cigarettes#noriaki “if dio and a literal serial killer cant kill us the cigarettes will” kakyoin
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I WANNA DRAAWW!! RAHHHGG!! Absolutely swamped with college work, im so tired TT (hence whatever tf this is lmao)
#posted this doodle on twitter yesterday but it's still very relevant today#fr cant do anything until I get 12 posters drawn make my homemade paper and finish/publish my 200 page book I'm gonna-#Send help#i miss being active sm :'((#SORRY TO THE 60+ ASKS IN MY INBOX I PROMISE ILL GET TO YOU SOON <333#anyway I hope everyone else is doing ok#sending love#(also husk please- stay off the internet lmao)#angel dust#angel dust fanart#husk#husk fanart#huskerdust#huskerdust fanart#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#tribbleart#<3
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Pov the cannibal overlords are judging your outfit (or discussing how they're going to cook you tonight, your choice 👀)
Based on very cool outfits for them I saw on twitter! Here's Alastor and here's Rosie
#hazbin hotel#hazbin hotel fanart#hazbin alastor#hazbin rosie#alastor#radiorose#digital art#my art#clip studio paint#YES I'm using clip studio paint for the first time in 3 years damn I missed that bitch#Welp that was tiring but I'm very happy with it#ALSO YES I KNOW ALASTOR'S HAND IS A BIT TOO HIGH I'M SORRY#by the time I noticed it looked weird I had already started painting and all of my layers were merged lmao#oopsie#please just ignore that detail 💃#or maybe this one can be seen as not-so-platonic radiorose?? lmao
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Carry me home
#final fantasy xiv#ffxiv#final fantasy 14#ff14#haurchefant greystone#haurchefant x wol#haurchewol#ffxiv wol#ffxiv spoilers#heavensward spoilers#final fantasy xiv spoilers#tinydraws#let me know if i’m missing any spoiler tags#tagging seems like it would be an easy and straightforward thing but also. i’m stupid.#anyway i choose to believe that Rowan carried him back to the manor#even if someone tells me otherwise i will not believe them#also i choose to believe that these two had it bad for each other#neither of them said anything but everyone could tell lol#haurche specifically was very Not Subtle in his displays of affection#and Rowan for the most part picked up on it#not everything cuz she's still in the midst of working on accepting any amount of companionship. but like. most.#and went ‘honestly.... if i told him i liked him it would probably go well. We just have so much stuff to deal with; now’s not a good time'#and then the time came and went :’)#and Rowan went ‘Did….. did he know? Did he Know how much I loved him? did he KNOW???????’#and then she grieved behind closed doors away from everyone#and also tried to replace said grief by focusing a lil too hard on her duties#idk i’m still working out WOL lore but this is what i got so far lol#or at least in regards to haurche
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Aaand that's a wrap! Keep staying fresh.
#i found out about wii u servers closing very last minute akjdgh but i was able to play several battles before the servers closed thankfully#god splat 1 was so good the weapons and maps were so fun i might try to play it through...other means#also BRING BACK SALTSPRAY RIG ;__; it wasn't in rotation when i played rip#truly end of an era o7#goodbye splatoon 1#rip squid jump too#digital art#fanart#splatoon#squid sisters#callie and marie#callie splatoon#marie splatoon#agent 3#i realized the missed opportunity to add capn cuttlefish...#art
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🐟🔁
#my art#bungou stray dogs#bsd sigma#bsd dazai#gang. chat. audience. I miss mersault so bad.#anyays I played a lot with this one :) played w colors and coloring style a bit#and also learned fucking blockbench. for my silly joke.#100% worth highly recommend very intuitive program. and free !#also davinci resolve. much less intuitive but at least still free.#I'll probably post just the coelacanth render at some point uhh soon. maybe tomorrow. we'll see
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#god i can't wait to see the backstory of how this became her centering technique (wishful thinking)#absolutely love that she did it when 'agnes' was 'woken up' in wv. idk if it was meant to be connected but it works so well#also very interesting that the ep6 flashback to ep2 is just slightly different as well#edit: added last one. thank you kindly @the-ominous-owl for reminding me i missed one#agatha all along#agatha harkness#kathryn hahn
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🤍 Monster AU(?) Horror movie/actor AU(?) drawn for the Le Blanc zine in 2023 🤍
I thought it would be super fun to go for an old school, kitschy horror movie poster vibe with a werecat!Chat Blanc -also I may or may not have just come out of a huge monster romance reading binge at the time huhuhu
#I can't believe it's been over a year since the last time I made ML fanart 😭#this was also the very last piece I drew right before I had a major art style shift to how I draw now#I really do miss these comfort characters so much 🥺 One of these days I'll finally sit down catch up with the show... 😔#miraculous ladybug#miraculous ladybug fanart#miraculous fanart#chat noir#chat blanc#marinette dupain cheng#marichat#celdraws#celerydays#mlb#mlb art#le blanc zine
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