#i also made it so i work from 8–4 on fridays and saturdays during the school year so

[megasceptile001]

i shall have only morning shifts at work

[hellfirenacht]

Wing Man Part 9

Fic Summary: Steve 'the Hair' Harrington is your best friend, and is constantly striking out. Sick of this, you two make a deal; you'll wing man for each other. Hooking Steve up with dates is easy, but he finds himself struggling to find you a date. At least, until Dustin starts talking about his new cool friend Eddie.

Chapter Summary: You and Eddie go on your first date, but the past always lingers. 6.5 words

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Note: Y'all get to be a little horny in this one. As a treat <3 Also the poll results said you don't mind small details of what you all are wearing, and that you wanted to dress moderately slutty so I tried to keep that in mind. Enjoy!

Eddie kept his promise. For the next few days the two of you found yourself talking on the phone a lot between work shifts, band practice, and school. Late night talks became the norm, the two of you spending your evenings opening up to each other bit by bit. 

You told him about Family Video and gave him the scoop of which of his peers were renting from the back rooms, and he told you about his own shifts at the Hideout and about the weird things his drunk usuals would say. Bev had been giving him shifts again, which was at least a small steady income compared to his usual dealings.

The next Tuesday you had gone to the Hideout with Eddie, this time with him picking you up and dropping you off after. It wasn’t a date, not exactly. It was just two people who had an interest in each other hanging out with other people. Eddie had said the main reason it wasn’t a date was because he was technically working, and he didn’t want your first official date to have his band mates tagging along. Of course, that didn’t stop them from giving him knowing looks and giving him shit whenever your back was turned. Eddie would carefully keep tabs on how often they would do it, and would make them pay later during their campaign. 

That was fine with you, you were still more than happy to just spend time with Eddie and learn more about him. Watching him play guitar was mesmerizing and it was nice to be able to gawk at him in peace during his set without Steve telling you to close your mouth and stop drooling. 

After the set and dropping everyone else at home, the two of you had spent another two hours in his van just talking. Now that everything was out in the open, that awkwardness that had been between the two of you had faded into nothing. You found that talking to Eddie was as easy as talking to Steve, and you loved hearing about all of his stories from Hellfire and hearing him talk about his music. 

The only reason the two of you didn’t stay up until morning parked in front of your apartment building was because Eddie was reminded by you that he was still in school and needed to get some sleep for class the next day. When you kissed his cheek again before sliding out of his van he made a mental note to beg Bev to go on with Corroded Coffin on a Friday or Saturday for once. 

Halloween was on a Thursday this year, and you had made it very clear to Keith that you were not going to be working that night, or the next day. You had saved up all your bartering chips of overtime and days where you came in when anyone else couldn’t. You had put in your time off request three months in advance. 

Work could have you any other day of the week, but Halloween was yours and yours alone. You’d work Christmas, Thanksgiving, Easter, Arbor Day, and Groundhog Day. You’d forgo Easter Sunday, New Years Eve and Day, and you wouldn’t bat an eye at Valentines day. But Halloween? That was yours and yours alone. 

It was the one day out of the year that you felt like you could be you. Even after the monster that is Hawkins High tried to strip you of being yourself, you pushed through and came out the other side of graduation with a new determination to never water yourself down again. You worked your ass off to save for your own run down apartment, to find clothing that you loved and not just what your peers told you to wear to blend in. 

If you wanted to show up to a shift on Halloween dressed as Han Solo with a Teddy Bear, you damn well could and no one could stop you. Not even Keith. 

But lucky for you, when the schedule for the week was posted that Monday, your name was thankfully cleared for Thursday and Friday. Keith could handle himself for those two morning shifts, and Robin and Steve could handle the evenings. It’s not like Family Video was really busy or open late on Thursday nights and you trusted Steve and Robin to handle the Friday rush. 

You woke up that Thursday feeling like it was your own personal Christmas. You took your time to wake up, have breakfast and get ready for the day. You almost called Eddie before you remembered that it was still a weekday and he would be in school. Besides, it would be weird to call him before your first date, right? 

Steve had given you a crash course on first dates over your shared shifts. His advice was a mixed bag to say the least. Every time he gave you insight into the male mind on how to act or dress or talk on a first date he would then backtrack when he remembered who he was talking to and who this first date was with. 

“Listen, you got this far by being a weirdo.” Steve had finally said after the conversation had basically gone nowhere. “I guess keep talking about eating bats and fake being drunk and you’ll get the guy.”

“You know, when you put it like that I’m starting to see why maybe this whole casual dating thing hasn’t worked for me in the past.” you had replied. 

Most of your Halloween was spent by yourself, but that wasn’t a bad thing. You started off with a nice slow morning of carving your annual jack o'lantern, having learned the hard way to not put it out early, lest it rot or be smashed by asshole kids in the neighborhood. The afternoon was spent around town, just taking in the crisp fall air and the decorations set up by all of the shops.. 

The hypocrisy in this town was stunning sometimes. Every other day of the year you had been followed by whispers of the Satanic Panic and any idea that something other than the norm might be related to something more nefarious was ostracized. Sometimes you could understand where the fear was coming from, after all the Byers kid had disappeared, presumed dead, and then had come back all within a week a few years ago. Barbara Holland had been killed by chemicals in the Hawkins Lab. There was even the fire at the mall that had killed the police chief, as well as the local lifeguard. It seemed like every single year some new tragedy would strike the small town. 

You couldn’t wait to run away to somewhere else. 

But for now, the day was yours and the night was Eddie’s. Your stomach flipped every time you thought about meeting up with him tonight. You had built up this production a lot over the past few days. You had seen the shadow cast about once a month since you were old enough to go at 18, give or take a few times where you had other plans. 

Each time you had gone, you had checked the board hoping to see the announcement that they would be opening auditions to be part of the cast or crew. But the show was tight knit, and that rarely happened. 

But at least that meant that tonight you could share something with Eddie other than your origami. Not that you were embarrassed by your hobby, but compared to running a D&D campaign and being in a band, it didn’t feel like much. 

You never seemed to run out of things to talk about with Eddie though, during your late night talks on the phone. When you weren’t captivated by his tales of running Hellfire or the inspiration for his music, you two would talk about everything else. Music, movies, the occasional small town gossip, anything you two could think of. You had already compiled a small list of movies that only one of you had seen, because all new relationships always start with “What do you mean you haven’t seen this movie?!”

That’s how you and Steve and Robin had bonded over those first few months. It probably wouldn’t be that much different with Eddie. 

After a long stroll through the town, a quick stop in to your favorite coffee shop for a treat, and a bout of window shopping in the Halloween aisles of local stores, you made your way home. You considered dropping by the high school to see Eddie as the afternoon came to a close, but you didn’t want to seem desperate. You’d see him soon enough anyway. 

As the evening went on, you popped in a few thematically appropriate movies that you watched between doing your hair and make up and passing out candy to kids who came up to your door. You may or may not have saved some of the best candy for yourself. And Eddie. He liked Snickers right? You hoped he did. 

You were ready a good two hours before you needed to meet him at the theater at midnight. You were starting to wish that you had invited him over to pre-game before the movie, but unfortunately you had listened to some of Steve’s advice and were left sitting around in your fishnets and dark lipstick for your first date with Eddie. The only thing you weren’t wearing yet were your tall boots which you only broke out for this showing because they were too uncomfortable to wear anywhere else. 

Steve had relented that you were going to dress weird for the date, considering the day and the nature of what you and Eddie were doing, but he said it’d be too weird to get ready with him. 

You decided that next time would be different. Next year, you’d have Eddie over all day, and the two of you would spend the day carving pumpkins and listening to music and arguing over what movie to watch as you passed out candy. Eddie would probably be stingy with the candy so that there would be leftovers for the two of you at the end of the night, and you’d be giving bars out by the handfuls. Maybe the two of you would cough up the dough for some full sized candy bars for kids with really fun costumes and-

What were you doing? You weren’t even officially dating yet, the first date hadn’t even happened! You were getting ahead of yourself, and thinking way too far ahead. You didn’t need to be thinking these domestic thoughts about a guy you barely knew. 

Get your shit together. You scolded yourself. Let’s try and go on one date first, then maybe have dirty thoughts about him and then I can have mushy domestic thoughts about him if things go well.

You were really hoping things went well. 

After around 10 pm the trick-or-treaters tapered off and you dumped the remaining candy in your bag for the movie. Your hand itched for the phone around 10:30, your brain telling you that it was getting late and that you should call Eddie now if you wanted to talk to him before bed, and you reminded yourself that you’ll see him in an hour. 

The hour could not go any slower. 

“Steve, I’m freaking out.” you said into the phone the second he picked up. “What the fuck am I doing?!”

“You’re going on a date with Eddie Munson to a midnight showing of a movie that has no plot.” he yawned. 

You resisted the urge to hang up on him and instead paced around your living room, holding onto the phone. 

“Steve, I’m serious!” 

“So am I, the more you talk about the movie the less sense it makes.” 

You lightly smacked your head against the wall. “How do you do this every week with different girls?! I’m going on one date and I feel too damn antsy.”

The chord to your phone stretched to its limit as you walked towards your bookshelf and pulled out your senior year yearbook, flipping through it. 

“Dating is like any other skill, you have to practice and actually do it to be any good.” Steve sighed into the phone. 

“I hate that.” you said, looking through the Ms. Maddison... Morrison.... Munson. 

No photo available, what the actual fuck? You flipped through the book, to the club section but there was no trace or whisper of the Hellfire Club at all in the 1984 Hawkins High yearbook. 

“This was your idea.” Steve reminded you as you pushed the book away and reached for 1983’s yearbook. 

“And? I have a lot of ideas and not all of them are good.” You flipped through the book, trying to find Eddie’s name and photo. Why hadn’t you thought of this before?

“So... are you chickening out, again?” You could hear the mild annoyance in his voice. 

“No! I’m just... I’m just nervous, alright? I haven’t been on a date since Junior year. Wait no, there was that horrible study date in Senior year. It’s been a while okay?” you groaned. 

You scanned the Ms again, stopping for a split second to snicker at Chris Morrison’s horrible yearbook photo. His hair was an unfortunate overgrown sandy haircut that looked like a bad mix of a mullet and a bowl cut, with a fringe that fell in his gray eyes. His face was stoic and he looked like he wanted to kill whoever was in charge of the camera. 

A few photos later was Eddie Munson’s Junior year photo. Somehow seeing his face in your yearbook made your shoulders relax a little bit. You at least could confirm that you had indeed gone to school with him. His face was softer looking, and his hair fell just below his jawline.You saw a peak of his Hellfire shirt, the same one in Chris’s photo. He was smiling, well as best as a teenage boy who doesn’t want to get his photo taken would smile. It was endearing, and something in the back of your mind started nagging at you that this Eddie looked more familiar. 

“Hello? Anyone home?” 

You snapped back to reality, remembering that you were on the phone with Steve. “Yeah, sorry I got distracted. What was that?” 

“I said you shouldn’t be nervous.” Steve repeated. “You like him. He likes you. It’s not that complicated. He wouldn’t have shown up that night if he didn’t have an interest in you.”

“Oh, but what if it is that complicated, Stevie?” You sighed dramatically. “After all, the three of us seem to be horribly unlucky in love.”

“You’re telling me.” Steve admitted. “Three dozen dates later and I’m still looking for that spark.” 

Steve had been head over heels for Nancy Wheeler, and had his heart crushed. You hadn’t had any luck in love ever, with only a few failed dates under your belt from high school, and two one-night stands. Robin... you couldn’t get a read on her. She seemed to have a crush on someone, and Steve definitely knew who it was but they weren’t telling you. It hurt a little, but you knew that the two had a bond that you wouldn’t be able to touch. If Robin wanted to tell you, she would. 

Okay, you did ask and make sure that the person she was crushing on wasn’t Eddie. The last thing you wanted was to date someone who your friend had feelings for. Thankfully, Robin had quickly cleared up that she didn’t even know Eddie and therefore can confidently say that she had absolutely no feelings for the guy, romantic or otherwise. 

Steve spent the next half hour calming you down and talking to you as you flipped through your high school yearbooks, picking out Eddie’s photo in each one. There was even a small blurb about the Hellfire Club in your freshman yearbook. As you delved deeper in time, his hair got shorter and shorter, and he looked more and more familiar. 

Where did you know this guy from? 

When the clock struck 11 pm, you said your goodbye to Steve, checked yourself out in the mirror one last time, and made your way to the theater. 

It was twenty minutes until show time when you parked your car and made your way into the lobby. The yellow lights illuminated the crowd of people who had shown up for the annual midnight screening, and you took a deep breath as you scanned the crowd. 

Just for tonight, you felt like you could breathe. 

Freaks and weirdos from all over had come together for a night of sex jokes, aliens, music, and yelling at a screen. The room was filled with people covered in leather, and lingerie and costumes from both the show and other media. There were a few familiar faces, and you spotted two people that you recognized from the shadow cast in the corner. They looked... upset. Not at each other, you recognized the way they were talking to each other. You and Steve and Robin had given each other the same looks before when Keith had fucked up the schedule or a customer pissed one of you off. 

Whatever was the matter, the two quickly finished their bitch session and made their way back into the theater. You wondered what that was about, but didn’t have time to think about it too hard because a hand fell on your shoulder. 

Your breath caught in your throat when you turned around to see your date. Eddie’s hair was pulled back into a loose ponytail, which really showed his jawline and really long neck you wondered what the square of his jaw would feel like against your lips. He hadn’t ditched his battle vest or leather jacket you weren’t complaining and he was wearing a cropped shirt . You had to force yourself to not look at his exposed midriff you’ve never wanted to bite someone’s hips before holy shit, or note the fine trail of hair just below his belly button that dipped into his dark ripped jeans where a peak of blue boxers were peaking out. Did he taste as good as he looked?!  He had swapped out a few of his rings, but the obsidian one on his right hand stayed, and the chains on his jacket, bracelet and wallet made a noise with every movement he made. What would that sound like if he was on top of you? 

A small voice in the back of your mind told you that Dustin Henderson could rent any movie he ever wanted ever forever as long as you worked Family Video. 

You pushed those sudden X rated feelings down, and smiled up at him. “Hey, I’m glad you made it.” you managed to say, tongue tied as you thought about what you’d rather your tongue suddenly be doing- 

Eddie’s eyes drifted down your outfit in the same way that you were sure you had just looked at him. The idea that he might also be thinking similar thoughts about you made your heart race before he turned away. He was now looking around the lobby with wide eyes, taking in all the different people his expression was somewhere between elation and disbelief. 

“I don’t think I’ve ever seen this many freaks in person.” he said, his eyes darting around to the crowds of people. 

“You aren’t at Hawkins High and these aren’t children.” you said, watching his expression. “It’s why I like coming here each month. I get to meet people who are more like me.”

Eddie took in the scene, and you took in Eddie. Horny thoughts aside, you wondered how often he got to see people who weren’t cut from the standard Hawkins cookie cutter. From what he’d told you during your late night calls, his social circle was tiny. His only friends were in Hawkins, except for one Ronnie Ecker. 

You had escaped the monster that was Hawkins High School, even if you were still stuck in the beast of a town. You didn’t have much room to judge his smaller group when Steve and Robin were the only ones who you reliably hung out with on a regular basis. Even then, you knew that the two of them had a connection that went deeper than just coworkers and people who went to school together. 

Did Eddie have someone that he connected with the same way Robin and Steve did? There were so many things about him that you still wanted to know about him. 

A voice called your name, and your eyes lit up as you saw Robin and Steve walking over to the two of you. Excitement then shifted to confusion, wait, what were they doing here? Did they come here to crash your date? That didn’t seem right, not after Steve had put in so much effort into making sure that this date actually happened. 

You and Robin hugged and Steve gave a slightly awkward hello. Eddie was looking between you and your two friends, looking just as confused as you felt. 

“Hey, Robin!” you said, trying to figure out what was going on. “What are you guys doing here?”

“You invited us a month ago, remember?” Robin asked. “You made a big deal about dragging us to the Halloween showing this year and Steve and I got tickets. But don’t worry! We know this is a date so me and Steve are going to sit at the opposite side of the theater and make sure that we don’t bother you. Of course, Steve said that we shouldn’t come but we had already bought the tickets and I wanted to come and see this again.”

Oh... oh shit. Right. You had done that, hadn’t you? Before you and Steve had even started this whole thing, you had been bugging him to come see it with you. Robin had come and done it once with you earlier at the end of Summer, but Steve hadn’t been able to make it. 

In a sea of lingerie, leather, and sequins, Steve stood out like a sore thumb in his yellow sweater and tall hair. For once, he looked like the odd one out. Robin had always had a slightly edgier style, and with her sharpied black nails and chain necklaces, she fit right in. 

You were going to give Steve so much shit for it later. 

“Look, I didn’t expect us to actually come out tonight until Robin called and demanded I pick her up.” Steve said, apologetically. 

“I see what’s going on.” Eddie spoke up, looking between the three of you. “Mom and Dad are here to chaperone your first date.” 

You threw your head back and cackled at the joke, laughing unabashedly. 

“Steve’s the single mom with six kids.” Robin said. “But I’m not Dad, I’m more like the cool weird aunt.” 

“‘Why am I always the mom?!” Steve demanded. 

“Because you have six kids, Steve, keep up.” you pointed out. “But we all know Dustin’s your favorite.” 

“I’m telling Wheeler.” Eddie chimed in. 

“I’m not the mom, I’m the babysitter!” 

“You literally gave Max lunch money two weeks ago.”

“That doesn’t mean-”

“Oh look! They’re starting to tag the Virgins!” You suddenly said excitedly. 

Steve and Eddie stopped and stared at you, as your eyes darted to the two cast members that you had seen earlier. Whatever they had been bitching about was now put aside, and they were now walking around, each holding a bright red tube of lipstick. They had approached some guy and drew a giant V on their forehead. 

“Right, I didn’t really tell you about this.” you explained. “So at each showing, if you’ve never seen the movie in theaters you’re called a ‘virgin’. So, there’s a bit of a hazing ritual for newcomers. They call it the Virgin Sacrifice here. Basically, they draw a V on your forehead, and then before the show starts they’ll have the Virgins come up on stage, do some sort of dare or task, and then the movie starts.”

“How bad is it?” Steve asked as Robin grabbed his arm and started dragging him to the cast members. 

“It’s usually not that bad.” You said. “When I was a Virgin Sacrifice a few years ago they had me ‘Pledge Allegiance to the Lips’ and taught me how to do the Time Warp on stage while the sprayed me with silly string.” 

“When I went they had all of us blow up a bunch of red balloons and then hit them with thumb tacks when they were still in our mouths.” Robin laughed. “They called it ‘The Great Cherry Popping’.”

“Oh my God, I remember that one guy had crazy lung capacity and blew up like, ten in a row!” you cackled. 

“What do you think they’ll have us do?” Eddie asked, and for a second your brain froze as you felt his hand wrap around yours as you started to approach the cast members. You could feel the metal of his rings, warmed by his skin, pressing into yours. 

“They always mix it up every month so it’s hard to say.” you said. “But they always go crazy for the Virgin Sacrifices on Halloween.” 

“Got a fresh Virgin for you!” Robin says, shoving Steve in front of the Columbia actress who looked Steve up and down as if she were going to eat him. 

“Aww, a cute little Virgin just for me?!” she squealed. “You shouldn’t have! Come here, Big Boy.”

Steve didn’t have much time to react as a large V was placed on his forehead with the lipstick. He didn’t seem to mind, however, when Columbia leaned over and gave him a big kiss on the cheek, leaving a large lipstick stain. 

“You know, maybe I’m seeing the appeal of this.” He said as you pushed Eddie up next. 

“A two for one deal for ya, Columbia!” you said proudly. 

“Two?!” Her eyes lit up, and you could tell that she was having the time of her life. “Is it my birthday?!” 

She looked at Eddie and pushed his bangs back as she drew the V on his forehead and gave him a smooch on the cheek as well. You could already tell what Steve was thinking when he looked at you. Probably something like It’s not normal to let another girl kiss your date or something like that. And okay, fine, you were planning on wiping the lipstick off of Eddie’s face before you went in for the kiss tonight, but you didn’t see any reason to be jealous. You knew exactly what was going to happen tonight. Hell, when you first came you ended the night with three different lipstick marksI Really, Steve and Eddie were getting stiffed tonight. Besides, Eddie hadn’t given you any reason to not trust him, and why start anything if you didn’t trust a guy?

“His name is Eddie.” you offered up and Steve gave you another look that you translated to Are you wing manning your own date?! You ignored it. 

“What a coincidence! My boyfriend’s name is Eddie!” Columbia said excitedly. “You two even have the same leather jacket! Do you also ride a motorcycle?”

To your delight, Eddie didn’t miss a beat. “Not yet, but I might one day. Just a van for now.”

“Ohh, I bet a lot of fun happens in the back of your van.” she winked, and you could see a slight blush spread across his cheeks and the tips of his ears. “You should come join me and my Eddie for dinner next week, we’re having Meat Loaf!” 

You and Robin burst into a fit of giggles at the joke, as Eddie and Steve made eye contact for a moment and just shrugged at each other. Columbia gave Robin a wink and sauntered off to another group with their own Virgin to sacrifice.

With your Virgins freshly marked, snacks in hand,  and the doors to the theater opening, you parted ways with Steve and Robin as they made their way to the front row and you made your way to the back with Eddie. 

“The back row has my favorite call and response.” you explained as the two of you made your way to an open pair of seats. “And there are a lot of lines that are standard with every show, but if you can think of a good one, don’t even hesitate. Just call it out, okay? I’ll also warn you when people are about to start throwing things.”

“So, this is a bad movie where we are encouraged to yell and throw things?” Eddie asked, a wide grin on his face. “And where we sit depends on what we say?”

“Yes, it’s complete chaos.” you said. “I love it. Every show is always a little different because of the audience participation. Keeps it fresh, you know? Also, if you sit in the back you won’t get popcorn on your hair.” 

“Jeff dumped a bucket of popcorn in my hair once.” Eddie said. “It took me a week to get all the kernels out.”

“How the hell did that happen?!”

“I was sitting down, he was walking over with popcorn to bribe me for some roll, and then there was popcorn and butter everywhere.”

“I take it you didn’t give him the advantage he wanted?” you giggled. 

“No, he desiccated a snack in front of the Dungeon Master. He’s lucky I didn’t kill his character off when that happened.”

“The more I hear you talk about Hellfire, the more I wish I had been able to join in school.” you sighed. “You always sound like you have so much fun.”

“You... sometimes I do run some one-shots.” Eddie said, messing with one of his rings. “I haven’t done a game for beginners in a while but I could get the others to suck it up and run one for you.”

A warmth burned in your cheeks and you smiled at him. “Really? You’d run a game for me just so I could play?”

“Oh yeah, but just so you know, your movie isn’t the only thing that has its own hazing ritual.” Eddie smiled at you. “I tend to go extra hard on new players, just to make sure that they’re really up for the challenge of being in Hellfire.” 

You can go extra hard on me. You just barely managed to keep that as an inside thought with the way he was looking at you with those intense doe eyes. You definitely didn’t miss the subtle way his eyes darted to your lips for just a split second. 

Oh, you were so going to kiss him tonight. Not yet, not right now. If you went in for the kiss now, you just knew that you wouldn’t want to stop kissing him. And as much as you wouldn’t mind that, you also really wanted to share this experience with him. 

“So, is that a Hellfire thing, or a you thing?” you asked. “Did any former Dungeon Masters have hazing rituals, or are you just that sadistic?” 

“Chris didn’t need to haze anyone, if that’s what you’re asking.” Eddie said. “Hard to haze new players if he never let anyone new play.”

“Touche.” 

“He was actually in the theater program the last semester he was with Hellfire.” Eddie said suddenly, as if he had just remembered. “He got roped into doing backstage work for the Spring play and ran Hellfire into the ground. He’d always change the schedule of when we could meet up, and then get pissed with everyone when he couldn’t keep up.”

“I heard that doing tech for the shows is always a lot of work.” you said. “But it really sucks that he got pissed.”

“He ended up fully quitting Hellfire halfway through the semester, and that’s when I took over.” Eddie explained. “I had already been running the club anyway, but that just made it more official.” 

The lights in the theater flickered on and off, signaling the start of the show. 

“They’ll probably call you up to be part of the Virgin Sacrifice.” you said. “If you want to back out, no judgment. Your hair covers your shame, so you could probably duck out”

“I’ll do it.” Eddie said. “It’s only fair, if I run a one-shot for you and refuse to go easy on you, the least I can do is get on stage for your interest.” 

Had anyone ever shown this much interest in something you cared about? Robin had come with you before, and Steve had to be dragged here but this felt different somehow. Shit, the more you talked to him, the more you were tempted to ask him to leave the theater right now and show you the back of his van. 

“You know, I really always wanted to be part of the shadow cast.” you explained. “I’d love to be on stage as Columbia or Janet, hell I’d even love to be Riff Raff.”

“You want to be on stage in your underwear once a month?” Eddie raised an eyebrow. 

“It looks fun, but they never have auditions. It’s a pretty tight community, so you really have to know someone to get in. The most I’ve been able to do is sign up for clean up duty after the show. They give you tickets to the next show if you do that.”

The house lights went down, and you waited for the stage lights to come on and for the cast to come up and introduce the show and start the Virgin Sacrifice. The idea of seeing Steve and Eddie up there made you so giddy, and you couldn’t wait to tell Eddie more about the cast. 

But the stage lights never came on. Instead the movie just went and started and soon a bright red pair of lips were on screen, singing to everyone. 

They were skipping the Virgin Sacrifice? You had been going to this show for years and they never skipped the Virgin Sacrifice. And on Halloween? What was going on?

You were disappointed, but there was no use letting it ruin your evening. You shook it off and focused on singing along and teaching Eddie the important things to shout and when. How could you be too disappointed when Eddie was having so much fun? He was a natural, and witty and was quick to pick up on the jokes. 

It helped even more that he was still holding your hand. 

But something felt off during the whole show. There were a few members of the cast that you didn’t recognize, and they were giving a less than stellar performance. Choreography was wrong, the lip syncing was off, and Janet’s bra and slip were too... sexy. You also felt the man with the long sandy hair playing Rocky would have better been suited for Riff Raff.

Whoever coordinated this show, didn’t do a very good job. You felt bad that Steve and Eddie’s first time at the show wasn’t the best, especially after you had talked it up so much. 

If Eddie noticed the lackluster performance, he didn’t say anything. Maybe you were being too nitpicky, he was having a blast after all. Eddie was cracking jokes, and his voice carried through the theater so well even the front row fuck the front row! could hear him. 

As the credits rolled, and everyone made their way out to the lobby, you met back up with Steve and Robin. 

“That movie made even less sense than when you told us about it.” Steve said and you just shrugged. 

“I never said it made sense, I just said it was fun.” 

“I wouldn’t mind coming back.” Eddie said. “I wonder if they’d consider a live band to go with the stage actors.” 

You had to stop yourself from dropping down to your knees. One knee or two, you hadn’t decided yet. 

Robin yawned and you caught a glimpse of a lipstick mark on her jaw. You made a note to ask about that later. “If I’m out any later, my parents are gonna kill me. I still have school in the morning.” 

“Alright, let’s get you home.” Steve said. “See you two around.” His eyes darted down to where your hand and Eddie’s were still clasped together before pushing Robin out of the lobby and towards the parking lot. 

You and Eddie followed behind, but didn’t head straight for your cars. The two of you moved to stand below the yellow lighting of the yellow marquis. You watched as Eddie leaned against the brick wall and lit a cigarette, blowing smoke that disappeared under the clear sky. 

Under this lighting, you had a familiar feeling. There was something in the back of your mind, like a picture that was made of the same smoke coming from between his lips. Every time you reached out and almost had it, it disappeared in an instant. Something about the way he looked right now gave you a faint memory of being nervous, but not in a bad way. 

“That might be the first time I’ve ever felt normal.” Eddie said, looking at you. “I didn’t realize how many freaks there really were in Indiana.” 

“There are freaks and weirdos everywhere, if you know where to look.” you said. Eddie pocketed his lighter and took another drag. “Most people hide it though. I’m glad you don’t.”

“Yeah?”

“Yeah. It’s nice to see someone really being themselves in this town. You’re a breath of fresh air.” you looked out at the street, watching as people got in their cars and drove out of the parking lot. You caught a glimpse of the Columbia, only catching her by her hair and make up as she rushed out of the theater towards the parking lot. “I... even if this doesn’t go anywhere, I like you.” you admitted. “I want to keep being friends.”

Eddie frowned and faced you. He had dropped your hand to light his cigarette, and you noticed his hand move towards yours before stopping and falling back to his side. 

“Is this your way of letting me down easy?” he asked, and your heart broke seeing the confusion in his big brown doe eyes. 

“No!” you said quickly. “No, not even a little. No. I want to see you again. A lot.” 

Eddie’s face relaxed and this time he did take your hand. He dropped his cigarette and snuffed out the butt with his sneaker. You took the hint and moved closer to him as well. 

“You like me?” he asked, and you liked the way his dimples showed when he smiled. 

That was the high sign. You didn’t even care that he still had a lipstick mark on his cheek, when all you could focus on were those warm brown eyes. You started to lean in, and you felt Eddie’s free hand move to your arm and up towards your shoulder. When he got close enough to count his unfairly long eyelashes, you closed your eyes-

“Eddie? Eddie Munson?”

Reality snapped back into place as you two heard a voice. You looked at Eddie’s face first, and there was an intense look in his eyes. His hand fell from your arm, while you tried to decipher what his expression meant. 

You turned around to see who he was looking at, ready to kill whoever had interrupted the moment. 

You hadn’t recognized him on stage as Rocky. The man's long sandy hair was now tied back and his overgrown fringe still fell into his gray eyes. He had filled out since high school, and he wasn’t wearing that stony scowl that had been his staple all through the years you’d seen him. 

“Chris Morrison?!”

ALSO I think I might have run out of blogs to tag? It won't let me tag anymore blogs for the tag list but you can also find this story on AO3 and sub there as well!

Next Chapter

a/n: This chapter turned out way longer than expected and I still didn't fit everything into it! I had a whole other scene planned out, but that just means I have the motivation to start on the next part!

Dividers by @strangergraphics

Tag List: @k8loo @terrormonster55 @sp1dyb0y1008 @crocwork-clockodile @ali-r3n @mxcheese @josephquinnschesthair @gagasbee @peaches-roses-sins @witchwolflea @vintagehellfire @royale1803 @cumslutforaemond @prestinalove @browneyedgirl320 @perpetualmessmachine @thebook-hobbit @mistonk @cultish-corner @grishaversecaptivated @sortagaysortahigh @halialex1119 @bakugouswhOr3 @siriuslysmoking @pookiesnatcher @sky-full-0f-fl0wers @takemetoneverlandbabe @killjoynotes @maelibo @themunsonator5000 @wheels-of-despair @woodlandsubshrub @ghcstpyre @pedroschka

[whatwouldsylwrite]

At least I got you in my head (4)

(3)

Summary: Abby is straight. And then you move in with her.

Tags: modern au, fem!reader, straight!abby (she is doing some comphet bullshit), pining, idiot in love and it's abby, reader is gay and tired.

Notes: Happy pride month, guys! I feel like I committed a hate crime with this chapter, so I'm sorry. It's also longer than previous chapters by 2k. And um, the "hate crime" part (not literal hate crime, just some angst) is rushed because I really didn't enjoy writing it :/

Black haired girl is Yoon Jiwoo from My Name, and she is a badass, if you want to see some female violence go watch some edits of her.

Taglist: @abbyily @lillysbigwilly @gravygranules @blairfox04 @frogtits1 @ccinnamongrl @ninazenuk @urmomsgirlfriend1 @sunkissedbibi @couchgarbage @nil-eena (if you want me to tag/untag you for the whole series dm me please)

-/-/-/-/-/-/-/-

Caitlyn was again looking like a zombie, sipping her bitter coffee slowly. You were sitting in the coffee shop on the campus, and Caitlyn looked at you like a grumpy cat. Or a very pissed off cat. 

Caitlyn wasn't happy you distracted her (saved from exhaustion) from her studies (staring at her paper for an hour). But you didn't care as long as she sat with you and decompressed with her disgusting bitter 3-shots-of-espresso coffee. 

"You look like shit." You told Caitlyn and she glared at you. "You need to spend your weekend just sleeping for 30 hours. You can't do this to yourself."

"I'm fine." Caitlyn scoffed, but accepted the doughnut you slipped to her. "Thanks."

"I swear I will stay at your place for the weekend."

"I don't think you can be separated from Abby for so long, (y/n). Quite frankly, it makes me worried." 

Oh god, Cait had her detective face on, like she was solving a puzzle right now, and it made you nervous. 

"Why?"

"Well." Cait sipped her coffee. "You have the gay yearning in your eyes. Are you, perhaps, falling in love with her?"

"No." You cut sternly, surprising yourself. You didn't expect yourself to have such a strong reaction. "I'm not falling for a straight girl."

"Maybe falling was a strong word. You're crushing on her." The word crushing sounded so alien from Cait.

"It's manageable." You shrugged, not wanting to discuss your own weakness, but not wanting to lie to Caitlyn either. "I know I don't have a chance."

"This is quite upsetting." Caitlyn said and squeezed your hand. "I don't want you to get hurt."

"I won't, I promise. I'm not stupid." You winked and drank your coffee. "Do you want to come to her fight on Friday?"

"I have to finish that paper." Caitlyn groaned. She noticed how you narrowed your eyes on her. "I swear, I won't study during the weekend. But if I push myself I can finish it."

"I'll be at your door at 12pm on Saturday. We will go outside, have a walk in the park, go to the bookshop or whatever nerdy place you want to visit. We both can use some downtime."

Caitlyn sighed but didn't protest.

"I'll text you when I go to sleep. Count 8 hours and then show up."

You nodded, proud of Caitlyn compromising on this topic. She didn't like "wasting time" but if you said it was for your benefit too she usually agreed. You trapped her in taking care of herself by thinking she was taking care of you, and it worked well. 

"Ask Ellie to come with you to Abby's fight. I'm sure she is going to be there anyway."

"You're right." You smiled and took your phone out. You still had Ellie's number from months ago. "Have you talked to her?"

"Yes. We study together from time to time, and sometimes I invite her to play chess." 

"Good. I'm happy you found your nerdmate." You smiled at Caitlyn and she smiled back. "Or is there something else?"

"No, we're friends. Not the kind you are with Abby." Cait looked pointedly at you. "I may be speculating, but I have a feeling she is not as straight as she thinks she is."

"Well, what do you want me to do? 'Hey, Abby, I know you're so deep in the closet you met fucking Aslan but how about you change your entire worldview because I have a crush on you that I totally can get over?'" You scrunched your nose, irritated at nothing in particular. 

"Obviously not that." Caitlyn frowned like she usually did when she was stategising, as if she could find a way to get you and Abby together because she was just that smart. "Well, I think you should start dating again."

You shrugged and looked down at your phone. 

to: Ellie Williams

Hi, it's (y/n)

Are you going to Abby's fight on Friday?

from: Ellie Williams

Hi

Yeah

Wanna go together?

to: Ellie Williams

Yes

from: Ellie Williams

cool 

I'll meet you there

"I'm not going to use other people in order to get over Abby. I'm not fighting fire with fire." You said, continuing your conversation with Cait. 

"You could use a distraction." Caitlyn shrugged in return. 

"I'll just find someone to tutor." 

"And I'm a workaholic with bad habits?" Cait muttered under her breath and bit down on her second doughnut. 

Thursday nights were usually booked for the time to unwind for both of you: you'd come home late, tired and hungry after classes and lessons on campus, Abby would be already home, studying in the living room for her usual seminar on Friday, also tired. 

Abby heard the keys as you opened the door and in a few minutes you appeared in the living room.

"Hi." Abby's chest tightened at your small, quiet voice and she looked at you. 

"Hey." She said gently and panicked, not really understanding why. "You look like shit." Nice save, Anderson.

"I feel like shit." You shrugged and went to your room to take your change of clothes. 

Abby took a deep breath, trying to get her panic under control - what was that? What, she wasn't allowed to be gentle with her friends anymore? What the fuck her brain was playing at? That was concerning. For some reason she kept creating excuses why it was okay to touch you, and that wasn't even the weird, selfish part. The weird part was - why did she even need to create excuses? She was touchy with her friends, and you were touchy too, it wasn't any different from her friendship with Ellie.

But somehow it was, and Abby was confused. She tried to act chill and normal around you, sometimes getting a little more sarcastic than usual. It didn't seem to bother you, but Abby got embarrassed every time she'd suddenly treat you a little rougher because she'd get this weird panic. Honestly, it was pissing her off - you were nice to her, gentle even, and she was acting like a school boy, tugging on your pigtails. 

Just like now. You didn't look like shit, you looked lovely despite being tired, and Abby had a fucking knee jerk reaction to god knows what. 

You came back from the shower, smelling like you, and you sat next to Abby, putting your head on her shoulder. Abby stopped typing, her heart doing a micro somersault: you were so close so suddenly it scared her. Or whatever she kept telling herself, really. 

"I wanna die."

"You're just hungry." Abby murmured and pretended to be concentrating on her studies. "There's leftovers from yesterday or I can order something for you."

You made a tired sound and Abby chuckled. 

"What do you want? Thai? Indian?" 

"Nah, don't waste money, I'll cook something."

"I'm not 'wasting money'. You're tired as fuck." I want to take care of you, she wanted to say, but she was being weird again, so she didn't. "Just pick."

"Let's do rock paper scissors."

Abby won and ordered your usual while you went through the endless list of tv shows for both of you to watch. Now, when you weren't that close, Abby got back to studying - her weird panic could wait until she was done. In Abby's mind her gpa was way harder to fix than whatever emotional things she had going on. 

"Cait really likes Ellie." You said offhandedly, and Abby perked up. "In a friendly way."

"Really?" 

Abby was surprised for two reasons: Ellie had a temper and was only likeable when she was interested in someone sexually, and Cait was so out of her league it was ridiculous. 

"Yeah. They play chess and study together. Cait doesn't study with people, so I guess Ellie is special in that way."

"Wow." Abby chuckled. "I mean, Ellie is extremely smart. Is it your type?" Abby teased, continuing the bit about you crushing on Ellie. However something in her grew anxious at the thought of learning what your type was.

"It's more about her arms, you know." You laughed, looking a little embarrassed at the admission. 

Something felt hot in Abby’s chest as she looked down at her own arms. She looked back at you and flexed her bicep to see your reaction, and it was worth it: you looked dazed for a second before quickly looking away, flustered. Abby laughed at you and you hit her on her arm, embarrassed. 

“Fuck you.” You laughed too, and Abby felt too good in this moment, just laughing and teasing you; she never wanted it to end. "What is your type?"

Abby blinked. Her type? She never gave it a thought before: relationships weren’t something she was too invested in, it never seemed to be worth the effort. She never experienced this head over heels love everyone was talking about, so she never cared to run after boys.

"I don't really have a type." Abby said, thinking back to her not-so-long list of exes. "You know, with men if he is not an asshole it's already a win."

You laughed and Abby smiled, her confusion about not having a type going away.

"Great, we're definitely going to have a perfect love life with these standards." You chuckled and laid back on the sofa, letting Abby get back to her study. 

Abby's favourite part of Thursdays was happening around 10pm, when you'd finish washing the dishes - today it was putting everything in the bin - and Abby'd get her excessive amount of pillows and blankets so you two could cuddle and watch the next episode of the ridiculous show you both were too invested in. 

"Come on, come here." Abby said a little impatiently while you were putting some pillows away. 

"I'm not the one who made a fucking fort out of pillows." You grumped but soon enough you put your head on Abby's shoulder, your hands tucked in front of your chest. Abby always expected you to hug her around her middle, but you never did, and she wasn't sure how she felt about it. 

Sometimes, very rarely, when you'd get too tired, you'd fall asleep on Abby's chest, and Abby never had the heart to wake you up. You already showered, everything was clean and you didn't have any tasks to do, so why would she wake you up? Just so you could walk to your bedroom, your sleep interrupted? No. 

Abby looked down where your head was, curious if you were asleep after the episode ended, but you looked up just as she lowered her head, and fuck you were too close. So close Abby's heart fucking malfunctioned and started beating five times faster. She could feel your breath on her face and something was demolishing under her ribcage - it happened in a matter of seconds and you moved away, creating the distance between you, but Abby was so scared in that moment she didn't breathe. 

"Do you need to study?" You asked as you moved away and sat next to her. Abby tried not to feel disappointed at losing your warmth. 

"I'm done, actually. I feel kinda confident about tomorrow, you know?"

Abby stood up and started tidying up the living room, putting everything in its place.

"You're smart, Abby. You'd nail that seminar, I promise." 

"Thanks, (y/n). You're coming tomorrow to my fight, right?"

"Yeah. I even cleared my schedule for it." You said, pleased with yourself and Abby smiled. "But I'll kill you if you get hurt, you hear me? No missing punches."

Abby laughed and came closer to you, refusing to feel weird about being affectionate with you. It was fine. 

"I will be careful, I promise." Abby murmured as she leaned down and kissed your forehead. "Don't want to get in trouble with a woman who feeds me."

"Damn right." You said sternly. "Good night, Abby."

"Night, (y/n)."

You only had a vague idea about MMA fights: you were never really interested in sports, let alone violent sports, but well, Abby invited you so you decided to give it a shot. You weren't sure you'd like it (seeing Abby being punched? No thank you), but Abby wouldn't have invited you if it wasn't important to her, right?

Or were you fantasising again? Making a big deal out of nothing? Fuck, it was getting harder and harder to keep yourself in check with these things. Abby was sweet, and you were weak for sweet girls. 

You tried not to get delusional when your suspicion got too strong - was it intuition or wishful thinking? Were you seeing things that weren't there or were you ignoring what was? You didn't know, and yeah, it was manageable, but also - it drove you crazy. You couldn’t live like this, questioning Abby’s every move and every word.

Maybe you should have talked to her about the possibility of her not being straight, but her best friend was a lesbian, surely Abby had a moment to reflect on her own sexuality like some straight girls did when they found out their friend was gay. Abby was smart, she’d have figured it out already. 

God you thought you weren’t that stupid, but you were failing not to fall for Abby for a month and a half already. Hubris is a bitch, huh.

Ellie met you outside the place where the fight would take place fifteen minutes before the start. She looked good, as attractive as always - yes, (y/n), you needed to look at women you actually had a chance with, good job, keep it up - and the look she gave you suggested she thought the same about you. She even took your hand in hers as she led you to your seats, and you didn’t protest - somehow Ellie being touchy felt natural, and her cool hand felt nice on your skin. You sat together and you looked around.

“There’s supposed to be medics around, right?” 

“Yeah, but Abby doesn’t get super injured, she’ll be fine.”

“Have you seen her face? I almost went into cardiac arrest when I saw her.” 

“That’s her usual day at practice.” Ellie shrugged, her thigh warm against yours as she moved closer to hear you better. “Don’t worry, she can take a lot more than that. She is tough and intimidating, and she actually knows how to duck. But if you tell her I said it - your ass is grass.”

You laughed at Ellie's words and she smiled back. She explained to you how the fight was going to happen, and you felt a little hopeful - how much damage can happen in a five minute round? Not a lot, right? Right?

There were other fights too, and you had time to adjust to the overall violence of it all. You didn't know the girls who were fighting, but even then when a stranger got hit you couldn't help but flinch. Ellie noticed how stressed you were getting, so she took your hand in hers to ground you. The touch was definitely easy between the two of you, and it was comforting, so you squeezed her hand back. 

"I don't know if I'd survive this." You laughed and Ellie squeezed your hand back. 

"Look, they're all fine. No blood, no bruises." 

"The standards are too low, Ellie. You're in sports too, right?"

"If you call skateboarding a sport then yeah. I'm a hell of an athlete." Ellie snorted. 

"You should've taken Abby with you." 

"Babe, she has been in martial arts since she was four. I'm pretty sure she'd have kicked my ass if I asked her to leave MMA."

You laughed at this, a little bit confused: Ellie was behaving like Ellie you knew, not Ellie that was studying with Cait three times a week. The difference was intriguing. 

Finally Abby's name was announced and you got tense, bracing yourself. But when she walked to the cage, you forgot how to breathe for a totally different reason: she was so intimidating and confident, her defined shoulders rolled back in a threat, and you just couldn't help yourself. She was hot. She was so hot you pressed your thighs together as your eyes roamed over her trained body that screamed power and dominance, her top and shorts letting you see her abs and thighs that could crush your head if Abby wanted to. Fuck. 

Mark you as scared and horny. 

Her opponent was similar to her in size, and you watched with wide eyes as they approached each other after the bell rang. Abby was light on her feet, not too fast as previous fighters, but she timed her punches well, immediately cornering her opponent. But the girl was quick to recover as she landed some punches on Abby's side with her legs and you gasped, terrified.

"Abby's okay." Ellie said to you and you finally exhaled, not looking away from the cage. 

It was the most stressful eighteen minutes of your life, and the relief you felt when Abby was getting the upper hand and she was punching instead of getting punched, was immeasurable. Abby didn't really let her opponent corner her, her face had that calculated expression as if she knew every way this fight could go. That was comforting, but not as comforting as hearing the last bell and seeing Abby's black glove raised in the air to show her win. 

"That was so intense." You admitted as you relaxed in your seat and Ellie laughed, her hands stroking your thigh. 

"Believe me, it wasn't. You need to watch Abby's previous fights, there's some intense shit."

"No thank you." You said. "Do we wait for her or? What the fuck we are supposed to do, actually?"

"She told me to meet her at the party, so we can head out. Are you going to the party?"

"I dunno." You admitted sheepishly. "I have plans tomorrow."

"Come on, it will be fun. You can leave early and still get your beauty sleep. I can even set an alarm for you, Cinderella."

"Okay-okay. I'll leave at midnight." 

Abby arrived at the party a little later than she planned, but at least everyone was already having fun and not yet wasted. She quickly grabbed a beer and went through people to find Ellie and then find you - in Abby's head you were supposed to be with her. Ellie, however, was talking to her other friends - that was how Abby referred to anyone Ellie befriended in university - she was laughing and you were nowhere in sight. 

Ellie noticed her and went for a hug, patting her back.

"(Y/n) said your fight was 'so intense'." Ellie laughed and Abby laughed too, because they both knew Abby had way worse fights. "Congrats on not having your ribs broken."

"You're so sweet." Abby said mockingly. "What did I do to have such a supportive, caring best friend?"

"Nothing you should be proud of." 

"Have you seen (y/n)? I kinda thought she'd be with you."

"Yeah, she was talking to some girl." Oh. "Close to the bar." 

Something not really pleasant filled Abby's chest after Ellie's words, something like disappointment. She expected to see you there, but you were somewhere else, talking to someone else. 

Abby took a sip of her beer and went in the direction Ellie told her to find you. And yes, there you were, talking to a black haired girl Abby didn't know. It looked like the conversation was friendly, and the other girl didn't stand too close to you, which brought Abby relief - what the fuck was wrong with her? Why was she so uncomfortable with seeing you with someone else? What the fuck?

She walked through people to get closer to you, and when you turned your head you saw her and smiled. Abby smiled back and watched you touch the other girl's forearm, saying your goodbyes. The girl smiled at you and motioned at her phone as you nodded before she started to walk away. When Abby came to you, the girl wasn't there anymore and your smile was only directed at Abby, and it calmed her down, the normalcy of your life getting back. 

"Congratulations!" You hugged Abby tightly and she hugged back, stroking your back on instinct. 

"Did you like it?" Abby already knew the answer, but she really wanted to tease you. 

"Liked seeing people getting punched? No."

"But what about all those arms, hm?" 

"I swear to god, Abby." You elbowed her and Abby laughed. 

"Was it your friend?" Abby asked cautiously, trying to pass her curiosity as something casual. 

"Hm?"

"The girl you were talking to. I didn't want to interrupt, sorry." Was she really sorry? Maybe. 

"Oh, don't worry." You said, not answering Abby's question, and it made her feel not good. "Are you feeling okay though?"

"You're such a mother hen." Abby rolled her eyes. "My side is bruised, and she got my lip, but otherwise I'm fine."

"Great."

Abby spent the next hour glued to your side, talking to you: it was fun to be with you outside your shared apartment. Yeah, you spent time together on weekends, but being around a lot of people Abby knew and showing who she was friends with (yup, people knew you because you were a tutor on campus and a lot of them swore they got their credits thanks to you) was a cool feeling. Abby felt cool because she was friends with you. 

"I have plans tomorrow with Caitlyn." You said as you checked the time on your phone. "I'll head out."

"Already?"

"Yeah. But you have fun, okay? Call me if you need me." 

"Need you?" Abby raised her eyebrow.

"What if you get so drunk you'd need assistance?" You teased and hugged Abby. "Have fun! See you at home."

"Okay, mom." Abby laughed and watched you leave, just a bit sad. 

She found Ellie and hung out with her friends until she needed a refill of her beer. And while she was waiting for her beer, someone scooted closer to her and coughed, catching her attention. 

Abby turned her head to see a guy her age with a stubble. He smiled at her and Abby smiled back, a little confused.

"I was at your fight today." He said as he looked her over, and Abby got thrills from his attention. "You know how to throw a punch."

"Thanks." Abby said, pleased. Guys rarely liked the fact she could fuck them up, and hearing a guy saying she was good was ego boosting. 

"I'm Owen." He stretched his hand for a handshake, and Abby took it.

"Abby." 

The vibration of notifications woke you up and you expected to see Caitlyn’s message saying she finally went to sleep. You checked the time - 3am - and looked at your notifications. Indeed, Caitlyn messaged you half an hour ago with “if i see you earlier than 12pm ill kill you”, but there were other notifications. 

from: Abby

Hi im with a boy

sorry

promise we won’t be loud 

Your heart sank, but you didn’t even have time to process your emotions as you heard the front door open and people talking in hushed voices. Of fucking course you woke up just in time to hear Abby come home with a guy. They quickly made their way to Abby’s bedroom, trying to be quiet, but you got hyper aware of every noise. Fuck.

It hurt, and it hurt even more because you were so fucking stupid. You knew from the beginning Abby would never be interested in you because you were a girl, but the safety of your apartment where the two of you existed in your small little bubble made you delusional. 

Abby was just affectionate and touchy, and you were stupid and read it the way you wanted to read it, getting your hopes up. Stupidstupidstupid

You heard the bed creak on the other side of the wall and your throat tightened. Abby liked guys and she was having sex with a guy right now while you felt your heart crush, because you overestimated yourself and thought you could easily manage your feelings. 

The problem was that you forgot that feelings were not manageable and not something you could compromise with. You couldn’t just decide not to feel something and then actually stop feeling it. This mindset trapped you into repression and repression could only go so far, and now the fucking dam was broken. 

You were in love with Abby, and you had no chance and Caitlyn was right: you were hurting yourself. 

You didn’t cry, keeping your composure and snickering at the lack of the noise from the other side: either Abby was very quiet in bed or the sex wasn’t good. That thought made you feel better, not for any noble reason: you were hurt and you wanted Abby to not feel good too, and you didn’t really care at that moment that it wasn’t her fault.

Somehow you fell asleep, not bothered by any noise - that made you smile cruelly again - and you tried not to think about this situation and your own feelings.

Caitlyn was right, you needed a distraction. 

Abby woke up with a pleasant ache in her body and her head hurting just a little. Her bed was empty and she was relieved - she didn’t like to wake up next to someone she barely knew. 

Well, knew enough to have sex with him, but not enough to wake up next to him. Abby genuinely liked Owen - he was easy going and polite, and honestly? Maybe you were right when you said you didn’t really need to know someone to hook up with them. And hey, Abby was so touch-starved she was too touchy with you, so it seemed like a great idea yesterday. It felt like it worked - she was probably too lonely the whole time and now she was relaxed and there was no pull to go and cuddle you. It made her feel guilty - if she stopped wanting to be close to you after she hooked up then it meant she was just selfish this whole time, substituting what she actually needed with whatever she could get from you.

Yeah, she didn’t feel like a good person right now. 

Abby stood up from her bed and assessed the damage: two bruises on her inner thighs and a hickey on her collarbone, not that bad. She didn’t like when guys left marks on her - it mostly caused problems with covering up, but Owen was kinda good with not leaving marks everywhere. 

Abby put her clothes on and made her way to the bathroom when she felt her chest tighten with anxiety: not only Owen was still here, but he was talking to you. Shit. 

Abby felt bad for bringing someone home without actually discussing it with you beforehand and now you were making small talk at 11am with a guy who was supposed to leave a long time ago. 

Owen noticed Abby and smiled at her, and she smiled back. 

“Morning.” He looked down at her neck and Abby blushed a little. 

“Morning.” Abby responded and waited for Owen to come closer to her.

He put his hands on her waist and kissed her on the cheek and Abby melted a little.

“Sorry, I have to go already, but text me anytime.” Owen murmured before leaving a small peck on her lips and Abby nodded. 

Owen left and Abby went to the kitchen where you were drinking tea and looking ready for the day while Abby felt like a mess. The guilt overpowered her and she sat on the chair opposite of you.

“Sorry for yesterday, I know we haven’t discussed bringing people over.” Abby said, but you smiled at her.

“Hey, we are young and horny, can’t blame you for getting your stress relief.” You chuckled kindly, and Abby felt relieved. “He didn't seem like a total asshole.”

Abby laughed, knowing it was a pick at her standards.

“Well, just as you said, don’t really have to know him to hook up with him.”

“See, you’re learning.” You nodded your head approvingly and Abby laughed again. “Actually, while we’re still on the topic, can I bring girls over?”

“I mean, yeah, I think as long as we don’t disturb each other, everything is a fair game.” Who was Abby to deny your own needs when she literally brought a guy over?

“Oh, okay. Thanks.” You didn't look too happy right now, and it confused Abby to a degree, but she didn't ask.

What Abby didn’t know in that moment, that by giving you permission to bring girls over, she started the end of it all.

--------

To: Yoon Jiwoo

Hi! 

Would you like to grab a coffee with me?

[tobias-carrick-appreciation-week]

Tobias Carrick Appreciation Week

EVENT MASTERLIST

Dr. Tobias Carrick here! Thanks for checking out my event. I'm used to being checked out, but this is a whole new way. It's long overdue if you ask me! But you know what they say, good things come to those who wait, and there are a whole lot of good things planned, and I can't wait to see what you come up with.

I'm gonna let the event's mod @jerzwriter take over from here. If you've got any questions, just talk to her... she'll take care of you! 😉

Welcome to Tobias Carrick Appreciation Week!

Tobias's character was woefully underutilized in Open Heart, but their loss is our gain. Why? Because it left us with an intriguing character that we can largely make our own. This week - take the time to share YOUR VERSION of Tobias and how he fits in your OH world.

All types of fanwork, old and new, will be accepted for this event. So send us your fics, headcanons, artwork, edits, moodboards, you name it! If it's Tobias related, it can be shared.

Day 1 - Saturday, April 1 - Where did this guy come from? Info & Templates for Day 1 We know little about his background. Tell us where he grew up. What about his family, life before Hopkins, and how it made him who he is today.

Day 2 - Sunday, April 2 - The Hopkins Years and Beyond Info & Templates for Day 2 Here's your chance to flesh out canon. Tell us about the rise & fall of his friendship with Ethan. What was the story of their mutual crush? What kind of student was he? What was his rep? And what happened to him during the years between Hopkins and when we met him again in Book 2? Day 2 can be anything from these years.

Day 3 - Monday, April 3 - OH Book 2 What did you like/dislike about Tobias in Book 2? What did canon miss? What was up with June? What did he think of MC, and vice versa? What are your HCs about this time?

Day 4 - Tuesday, April 4 - OH Book 3 How did that job offer come about? What was his motivation, and did it change? How did you see his relationship with Ethan change? Was he friends (or more) with your MC in your HC? What did canon miss?

Day 5 - Wednesday, April 5 - After Hours: Romance / Personal Life Info & Templates for Day 5 What did Tobias do when he was off the clock? Did he have friends he hung out with regularly? See his family? Did he date? Hobbies? This category is broad - use your imagination! 😏

Day 6 - Thursday, April 6 - Doctor Tobias Carrick What kind of doctor was he? Was he respected? Published? Did he teach? What made him tick? Contrast how he mentored interns/residents with Ethan's style.

Day 7 - Friday, April 7 - All About the Future Where do you see Tobias when the series ends? In the near and distant future. How did his career progress? Did he settle down? How'd that work out for him? Any part of his future.

Day 8 - WAIT! That's over a week! Yep, but Tobias can be a rule-breaker, and so is this event! Saturday, April 8 - Masterlists and ANYTHING GOES If you have a Tobias Carrick Masterlist, share it with us! Also, share anything related to Dr. Carrick or his world.

Sunday, April 9th Event Masterlist will be posted

Rules and Guidelines:

Please tag @tobias-carrick-appreciation-week on your post or reblog for your work to be included.

Make sure your work has a rating, and if it is NSFW or Mature, please make sure it is labeled as so.

Please use a :readmore: / page break to avoid excessively long posts. If a post is deemed to be too long, a new post with a link to the post submitted may be used in replacement of a reblog.

Tobias is an ambiguous character, so interpretations may vary. Works that aren't gushing adorations of Tobias will be included, but since this is an appreciation week, anything overtly negative will not be included.

I'm tagging those who have followed the event so far (and a few who may be interested) below. THANKS FOR CHECKING US OUT! :)

Tags: @alj4890 @songsaboutgirls @liaromancewriter @annoyingmillenialnewbie @hopelessromantic1352 @differenttyphoonwerewolf @trappedinfanfiction @jamespotterthefirst @lucy-268 @coffeeheartaddict2 @icecoffee90 @choicesficwriterscreations @choicesmonthlychallenge

[rosainta]

[Outdated! No longer applicable]

RQDL Announcement + Wednesday Art Dump!

Started December 13th, 2023 at 8:00AM, Home

Finished December 13th, 2023 at 10:45PM, Home

Announcement #1

Hello there, wonderful viewer!

(“Meet the Demoman” Art by me— more on that later!)

Firstly, the bad news.

I’d like to apologize for not posting these past couple of days. I realize that the whole point of these logs is that they are supposed to be daily… hence the name Rosain Quivan’s Daily Logs, LOL, and me breaking that purpose so soon after starting is a bit disappointing.

However, as I was attempting to continue King of Hearts (Part Three) over those two days, I came to realize that, unfortunately, I actually don’t have enough time to write as I initially thought I would. At least, during the weekdays. This is mostly in part due to classes, extracurriculars and just general life stuff, and as much as I want to urge myself to write and just wing the rest, that’s sadly not possible. And I don’t think that the only 3 hours I have free before sleeping is enough time to write anything substantial, much less of good quality that both of us could enjoy.

I’m sorry if you were looking forward to anything recently, like KoH3, only for it not to be there. I know I promised you that it would be the next log, but I believe I may have to push that farther out to this weekend, or worst case scenario next week.

I know it’s probably not such a big deal for you as I’m putting it here, since I am probably just another random TF2 person on the Internet for you (who, mind you, has only really been active for about 4 days), but it means a lot to me.

I made this vow of continuity and quality to both myself (to improve my writing skills and commitment) and you (to give back to the community whose inspiration never ceases to amaze me), and it pains me to know that I have already failed to follow through with it.

However, as much as this sucks, this does not give me the right to sulk over it, because sulking is for MAGGOTS!!! (Just kidding- sulk as much as you want, we still love you!)

Which is why in order to fix this, I propose….

A SOLUTION!!

(Now, the good news!)

(“Meet the Engineer” Also art by me— explanation coming in a bit, just a little more patience!)

Now, what I’m about to propose is a bit complicated, and I’m not entirely sure if this is going to work… but hey, at least it’s only after the 4th log right? Beginnings offer a lot of room for experimentation. And if it doesn’t work out, we’ll fix it when we get there.

So, because of real-life scheduling conflict, the best way for me to balance this out with writing (as well as all the other things I’d like to include here), I have decided to make a schedule for when and what these logs will look like and contain. Most of what will be on it will likely be considerably shorter works in comparison to say, King of Hearts, because of obvious time constraints, but they include a lot of different things to look forward to aside from the same old writing scheme, like say, artwork!

This way, it provides a bit more variety (so you’re not just stuck reading TF2 essays everyday LOL), and also the possibility for you to provide input, ask questions and make requests!

The first goals I had in mind when making these logs was for this to be fun and enjoyable for both of us, as well as sustainable. So, by having this schedule, hopefully that can fulfill both those goals. Now, enough of my babbling; here it is!

RQDL SCHEDULE

Weekdays (Mondays-Thursdays, possibly Fridays)

Posting time: around 10:30PM, Atlantic Time

Monday : short writings (poems, vignettes, opinions, other stuff like that.)

Tuesday : same as Monday

Wednesday : artwork &/ musical composition (such as shown above!)

Thursday : same as Wednesday

(Friday, possibly) : art requests, anything you’d like!!! (Within reason, of course. I have never attempted NSFW, so let’s maybe steer clear of that… for now)

Weekends (possibly Fridays, Saturdays & Sundays)

Posting time: earlier or later than 11:00PM, Atlantic Time

(Friday, possibly): writing requests, anything you’d like!!! (Again, within reason, of course. still steering clear of NSFW for the time being)

Saturday: long projects (multi-part stories, opinion essays, major art or music projects, publishing, etc.)

Sunday: same as Friday / Saturday

So, yeah, that’s the schedule for the logs! I hope you find it has more variety, and I’m really looking forward to being able to follow through with it, especially the requests part because it allows me to be able to interact with you all more and be able to hear your thoughts!

Again, I’d like to stress that the purpose of these logs is for them to be sustainable but most of all enjoyable for the both of us, so please let me know what I can improve over the course of these logs so those purposes can be realized! Your input is as important to me as booze is to Demo’s survival, so feel free to let me know what you’d like to see next.

Anyhow, that’s it for this announcement! I’m sure you’ve had enough of my rambling as much as my fingers are getting tired of typing, so I’ll just end this off with a final Spy art.

Have a great day, pally!

(“Meet the Spy” Art by me!)

(P.S. All of this artwork dates from around January from an old Daily Art challenge I made for myself, so it is quite old, but I thought it might be nice to share them anyway instead of them just sitting in my camera roll for the rest of its lifetime, LOL. I might post the rest tomorrow!)

Credits: Team Fortress 2 by Valve

Image source: Rosain Quivan

Written by Rosain Quivan Cross posted on Amino ( Rosain Quivan )

[steamishot]

T-22 days

8/18: plans changed -> hung out with just SC at her place

8/19: WFH together with LG at a cafe (my first time ever WFH at a cafe)

8/20: watch didi with matt

8/21: carbone lunch with matt

8/22: rubirosa and comedy cellar with matt

8/25: othership with T

8/26: switzerland

9/6: last dinner with T

9/7: last brunch with S&I

9/8: last hot pot dinner with LG

S & i decided to take a rain check on sunday. the initial plan was to go to A's place to visit her and her baby. however, because the commute is an hour long (includes train, bus, walking), i didn't want to risk being in a storm on the way home. there was 50% chance of rain during the day and the heavy storm was scheduled to start in the evening/night.

instead, we hung out at her apartment. got to use the pool, jacuzzi, sauna and steam room. i'm feeling lighter about the move, so it was really nice to have girl time. i hope we have more opportunities for 1:1 time in the future, instead of only with our SOs.

LG cooked me a fantastic italian dinner on friday. it was probably the most "romantic" gesture someone has ever done for me in the kitchen LOL. she had just returned from italy and made zucchini pasta with freshly grated cheese, and two types of crostinis. i was surprised by the amount of effort she put in, given that we've only really seen each other <10x. however, she seems overall like a high effort type of person. i was impressed by how well she maintained her apartment despite only being in NYC half the time. and at age 40, she started ceramics, signed up for swimming lessons at the YMCA, and just told me she's also doing a local spanish language learning class. i have admiration for her and definitely think "i wanna be like her when i'm 40".

i'm now feeling like a visitor on an extended vacation. i'm grateful to share these special moments with new(-ish) friends. a lot of the times while i was here, i really yearned for the comfort of old friends/family. however, now that i'm leaving, i know i will sort-of miss being uncomfortable LOL. i think i'll definitely incorporate some of my NYC lifestyle into my new LA lifestyle (i.e. putting myself out there more instead of staying in my comfort zone). i'm happy to have made 3 solid friendships (S, T, K) during my time here, and hopefully LG and i continue to keep in touch.

matt's work: he just completed his last day (night) at work last night! he's been in a much happier mood recently. things have been less chaotic and calmer since the job search ended. he'll have the next 1.5 months off before starting his new gig. i don't love that we'll most likely be together 24/7 from now until moving back, like literally <10 ft apart. but it is the last hurrah of surviving in a studio together for 4 years!

my work: work hasn't been overly busy, but has been constant. i may be PMSing but i fear that i've been coming off mean/condescending to A who i am still training. i'm trying my best to not let my frustration spill out in my emails and to continue giving her grace. sometimes i question if i'm expecting too much from someone new. this gave me a taste of what being in management may look like.

ceramics: i considered making more bowls and asking the studio or LG to ship it to me in LA if they aren't fired in time. i tried throwing on saturday and my mojo is gone. i decided i won't make any more things, but can go in and practice (maybe). i plan on buying one ceramics piece made by someone else in the studio as a souvenir.

fridge cleaning: we're keeping the contents in the fridge to a minimum and cleaning out the freezer. yesterday, i made an oxtail beef noodle soup. today, i'm making fish congee with the leftover frozen rice.

grocery stores: i used to always go to TJ, but have recently transitioned away from it. there would always be so many people (3 lines) and the process just became completely over stimulating to me. my fav grocery stores now are mr. beet and whole foods. i really like mr. beet for no frills produce. it's about a 20 min walk so it's an excuse to get steps in. i'm a fan of whole foods now for seafood and certain fruits/cheeses!

[28in2024]

I know I have a lot to catch myself up on: the breakup, buying a house, getting my GS-14 promotion, and adjusting to this new normal of being on my own. But that’s a later post because there is SO MUCH HAPPENING ALL AT THE SAME TIME. Need to brain dump this!

Monday, July 22nd - [WORK] Farewell with the team, PMA-209.

Wednesday, July 24th - [VOLLEYBALL] Played first Volo beach volleyball game at National Mall as captain. Carpooled with Charlie, first time talking talking to him and clicking fast.

Friday, July 26th - [BOYS]

1. Zach Fowler (Ohio) texted me at 4am seeing if I was down to come to Cincinnati after not talking to me for 1+ months

2. Charlie from volleyball asked me on a date via IG DM after literally 1 time hanging out. Turned him down and explained that I just got out of a long relationship and also we just met. Down to get to know each other more.

3. Had a “hangout” but pretty much a date with Cam that very expectedly lasted overnight and into the morning. Haven’t seen Cam in 3 months but had a very successful and intimate yet very wholesome date. Had KBBQ, walked around a very romantic old town at night, then I invited him over (stated not to be sus upfront) while he waits for his friend to pick him up. Watched cowboy bebop and samurai champloo then played some board games. Ended up laying next to each other on the couch at 2am and cuddled then kissed. Around 4am we both moved upstairs to my bed bc I had to get some rest before auditions!! He asked to be shirtless bc it’s hot and I told him I was too excited to sleep. He gave me a massage and we kissed some more before eventually drifting off to sleep. Made him filipino breakfast the next day and left him at the spot to Uber while I head to auditions.

Saturday, July 27th - [DANCE] Had Comeback Crew Auditions

Felt confident I did well in this 5 hour long process. Made friends along the way. Definitely got Korean fried chicken then showered and knocked out early after.

Sunday, July 28th - [FRIEND]

Went to church in the morning, ran errands, and finally visited nearby Ed’s plant world. Sean came over for the first time for homemade pasta dinner, Olympics, and good conversation.

Monday, July 29th - [VACCINE]

Got the COVID vaccine booster because I wanted to completely screw myself over for my first week at PMA-290. So sick and on Motrin around the clock the whole next day.

Wednesday, July 31st pt. 1- [WORK]

Laid out management style and team expectations to entire PMA-290 ROK P-8 team as new NH-4 case manager.

Wednesday, July 31st pt. 2- [BOYS/VOLLEYBALL/DANCE]

Carpooled with Charlie again and played second volo game. Had Zoom interview for Comeback Crew in the car on the way home.

Got McDonald’s and had good deep conversations with Charlie at my house until 11:30. I never imagined hearing “but they’re not my person” so sweet as his words. He seems like a very genuine, good guy that’s ready for something serious and aspires for marriage. Definitely interested in me and mentioned asking to hang out after volleyball season. He found out my ex boyfriend is khrystian, and I stated having khrystian and my friends on the same team is too messy to start anything with Charlie. He has a nice smile but he’s too short IM SORRY my tastes changed

Thursday, August 1st - [BOYS]

Celebrated Cam’s birthday showing him birria tacos at Mexican. Had ice cream at old town. Did advanced day one class. He texted me at the end of the night that he likes me a lot. I personally don’t feel the same. Not sure if it’s bc my social battery is crapped out or I am attracted to his appearance and not so much his personality. I need to sleep on it.

Angela also got engaged! She FaceTimed me during dinner!

Friday, August 2nd - [WORK]

Interview for FMS job at US Embassy in Rome

- we’ll see how this interview goes. I can’t help but think that if I get it, I really have a huge decision to make.

Friday-Sunday, Aug 2-4 - [FRIENDS]

Kyra and mharc coming over!

[ireceived-p8250000]

September 15-21, 2013

New Schedule:

MWF:

8:55-10:20 - Computer Science

10:20-11:45 - Philosophy and Logic

1:10-5:25 - Experimental Psychology

TTHS:

8:55-10:20 - Abnormal Psychology

10:20-11:45 - English 7

1:10-2:35 - Economics

2:35-4:00 - Rizal's Life and Works

6:50-8:15 - Ecology

I don't like my TTHS schedule. There's a two-hour break in between classes. Good thing I don't need a physical face-to-face job. I can do my job anywhere with internet access, so I bought a portable Wi-Fi device.

I also made a personal timetable where I can continue jogging in the morning or getting fit. Maybe I should opt for a gym membership. I need to research that.

During my break time, I'll work on creating graphics using Adobe. I start this week, but they need to train me first. It's paid training. I also need to set up my PayPal account and another bank account. I opted for BPI as my other bank. If I earn enough, I could afford a vacation in December.

I need a haircut, by the way. Hollmae and I went last Sunday to a hair salon where only men were cutting hair. I opted for a long bob with curled ends and baby bangs.

Mansoor's schedule is the same as mine, only in the major subjects. He is now getting AB English units to fill his time.

We met in the afternoon. Hollmae was still there, so she went with us. We stayed at the post office with snacks and shared stories. Mansoor said he liked my hair.

Monday:

I attended my classes. I'm classmates with Catherine again, and we share the same crush on our Political Science professor because we keep talking to him. I think it's just a mindless crush for both of us. In Experimental Psychology, Mansoor is the only male in the class, and it's Ma'am Jean again, teasing us. He didn't sit beside me but with Vivian, and I'm fine with that. It's better so it wouldn't be too obvious. In this room, only three people know about us.

I started my training with Yael Goddard. It's usually from 8-12. I'm okay with that. I told him my situation, and he said it's okay as long as I meet the 24-hour turnaround time.

Tuesday:

It's the craziest day. I've met the instructors and professors. Robbie is my classmate. It's only the two of us, and we are not really close. I rarely talk to him and don't really like him. We sometimes joke together, but I have no interest in interacting. But we sat together. It turns out we also have the same classes in Ecology.

For two hours, I decided to stay in the library and do my work. Mansoor told me I could stay in the SAO office, but I didn't want to impose, and it would really be obvious. But I sat in and met his supervisor and friends.

Computer Science is fun with the teacher, so I'm liking it.

Abnormal Psychology is interesting too, of course. We've waited for it our whole lives as psychology students.

We've already been told that we will have case studies again, so it's really fine.

Friday:

The training went well, and I got paid immediately $50. In the afternoon, while going down to my class for Experimental Psychology, Sir Apollo and I passed by each other. We held a gaze for a while. I smiled and continued going down, but he caught my wrist. I got away because we were in public, not to mention in school. I felt like my heart was being squeezed.

Saturday:

Since I have to go home late, Mansoor and I went home together.

At Home:

It's Roxanne's exams too. My parents are back already. My relationship with Roxanne, I think, is somehow fixed.

I talked to Roxanne if she wants to go on a trip with me to Hong Kong, and she wanted too, however, she had no passport. I told her to process it.

[purplesurveys]

1793

Yesterday

1) What was the weather like? Did it change your plans in any way? It was extremely sunny during the day which kind of sucked, because yesterday my family played host to a family reunion on the rooftop and the weather made things feel a little uncomfortable. In the afternoon, while the sun did hide for a bit it ended up being super humid anyway, so in either case it really just ended up being a super sweaty affair lol.

We addressed it by making sure our aircon in the living room was turned on the entire afternoon, so that anyone who starts to feel super hot or dizzy can choose to go down – which is why it ended up pissing me off when I caught a few people not even trying to hide their bitchings about how hot it was at our place and yet refused to go downstairs when I offered. Complaints are classic Filipino guest things but something I've never learned how to tolerate so I was pretty irritated from the get-go of that damn reunion.

2) What did you do yesterday, anyway? Helped my parents host said reunion, for the most part. I was so exhausted from all the walking and hosting and socializing all over the house so ngl I was knocked out from like 5 to 8, right after people left ha. When I woke up earlier this evening I spent a few hours playing a game on my phone and now I'm here winding down with a couple of surveys. Not a very eventful Saturday which is how I prefer my weekends to be.

3) Did you eat breakfast, lunch, and dinner? What did you have? I didn't have breakfast as usual. Lunch wasn't a full meal for me, I just got like 3 pieces of sushi from our reunion spread. I also didn't have dinner and just made a cup of coffee which is still right next to me.

4) Did you do some form of exercise? What? If going up and down the stairs 200 times counts as exercise then it would be that.

5) Who did you spend the most time with? My sister. Out of the huge crowd at home, we knew each other the best so we stuck together, lol.

6) What television shows or movies did you watch? I finished Gyeongseong Creature super early on in the morning (like, technically I was watching it from Friday then it bled into the midnight hours of Saturday haha), then I also played a couple episodes of Friends for the very few people who were in my age group in the reunion.

7) What time did you get up and go to bed? I got up at like 9. Went to sleep at 3 AM earlier.

8) What was the best bit about yesterday? I can't decide between watching Gyeongseong Creature and getting to eat sushi.

9) What about the worst? Being bombarded with work messages on a Saturday. My work! Makes me! Depressed!

10) Did you talk to anyone on the phone? Who? Why? My mom needed help ordering additional food for the reunion so she called me up while she was doing last few errands at the grocery so I can take care of it.

Today

1) What time did you get up? I just got up and it's currently nearly a half hour past 8.

2) What are your plans for today? I'll be taking my family to my favorite ramen place for lunch, then later in the afternoon I'll be seeing my close friends for our super late Christmas party.

3) Have you eaten any meals yet? What did you have? None yet. I don't mind not eating for a few more hours because I'll be eating a lot today lmao, so I'd rather save up the hunger so I can fully pig out for both lunch and dinner.

4) Are you planning on seeing your friends or boyfriend/girlfriend? Yup! I'm seeing Angela, Reena, and Hans later for dinner/Christmas party. I don't think we've been together since...August? In any case, we'll be at our fav Korean spot so I'm looking forward to it.

5) Does your favorite television show air today? Breaking Bad ended 11 years ago.

6) Have you spoken to your parents yet? Nopes.

7) How many texts have you received? I haven't gotten anything yet for today.

8) Are you planning on going to bed early? I never do on Sundays because I never look forward to Mondays.

9) Have you done anything remotely productive today? Nope. The full load of my day will start in like an hour when we head to our usual Sunday mass and after that I'm going to be traveling everywhere hahaha. BGC for ramen, then I might have to shop for clothes for my Seventeen concert next week, then head home so I can drive out for dinner with friends.

10) How much money did you spend so far? Are you planning on spending more later? None yet as it's only 8 but I am for sure going to be pulling out my card a few times today.

Tomorrow

1) What time do you have to get up tomorrow? Around 8.

2) What do you hope the weather will be like? Chilly but not too chilly. Cold weather feels so good that it makes me miserable when at work, because when the weather is comfy like that all I want to do is rest. So it'll be nice if it were cold, but I hope it's not too comfy!cold that all I'll think about is why I'm not in bed, lol.

3) Is there anything you’re dreading about tomorrow? The fact that I have work and that it's Monday.

4) Is there anything important you need to do, or can you just relax? Nope, can't relax.

5) Do you have plans to see your friends? No, I never have time to during weekdays.

6) What do you hope will happen tomorrow? I hope my schedule will be nice to me.

7) Are you going to wake up at home, or somewhere else? Just at home.

8) If you don’t have any plans, what do you think you’ll end up doing? I'll be working.

9) Do you have to get a work out in at some point? Nope.

10) Will you be working or studying at all? Yes.

[ahopkins1965]

How Do You Deal with Difficult People?  The very first thing that I should do is pray for them.  I realize that are many types of difficult people.  I know that I can be very difficult to deal with, but I have sense enough to calm down and relax.  I have been dealing with very difficult people for the past 8 years now.  I have been dealing with people, who use vulgarity and smoke marijuana on a daily basis.  These people live inside of my apartment building in Dayton, Ohio.  I know that I used to smoke marijuana and drink alcohol for 18 years; from 1972 to 1990.  I have been clean and sober for 33 years now.  I realize that I have making things difficult for myself.  This is very serious because you are killing your brain cells inside of your body.  It can also decrease your sperm count in men.  It can affect your ovum count in women.  I really did not know this until I got to High School in 1979.  I realize that I was doing things that did not make sense all of the time.  I really love people.  I love animals as well.  I have been earning bad grades in school.  I also did numerous of things that did not make sense.

I only wanted to be accepted by God and Mankind at the same exact time.  I know that I could not make man accept me, but they didn’t anyway.  So, I had to keep to myself and the friends inside of my classes adored me.  I do remember picking up a very large turtle before class.  All of a sudden, I saw someone getting out of a car, and he asked me whether he could cook the turtle?  So, I gave it to him.  I know that I should not have bothered the turtle.  My disposition at that time was very cheerful.  I did all of my homework at the University Computer Center.  I had so much fun that I began to use the World Wide Web from 1991-Present.  I loved the College Life.

Next, I want to inform all of you that I have made a public spectacle out of myself each day by saying things out of my mouth that hurt other people.  I guess, I was making things bad for myself.  I got into a lot of street fights in Dayton, Ohio.  I also got into fist fights in Grand-Rapids, Michigan for a total of 4 months.  I knew that God was watching me throughout that time.  God is recording everything that we are doing to ourselves and other people.  This is very serious because I was a very difficult person by choice.  During that time, I have lost friends and lost female friends as well.  I did not have any business doing things to hurt my family members and friends.  I want to inform all of you that God has changed my overall behavior since 1990.  During that year of 1990, I relocated to Toledo, Ohio.  I got a job and a place to live.  I was working at a plant located on City Park Avenue in Toledo.  During that time, I had traveled to Dayton and Lima Ohio as well.  I guess during that time, I was dealing with lewd women as well.  I had dealt with lewd women from 6/21/1986 until Friday July 2, 2010.  I was only dealing with women who were drug users and abusers.  I wanted to inform all of you that I did not care about myself.  My grandparents and mother were furious with me. 

They found out that I was spending money on female prostitutes.  I know that my life could have been better.  I was responsible for holding myself back.  I want to inform all of you that I graduated from college at the University of Toledo in Toledo, Ohio.  I earned my Associates Degree on Saturday June 12, 1993.  I graduated with my Bachelors of Arts Degree in Interdisciplinary Studies and Social Work on Saturday June 17, 1995.  For 3 years, I lived inside of a Crack House on 126 Rosalind Place off Cherry Street in Toledo, Ohio.

Further, I used to conduct myself like a person who was from the streets of Dayton, Ohio.  I really wanted other people to like me and accept me for who I am as a Child of the Highest God.  I know that I used vulgarity during class in college and high school as well.  I made a lot of mistakes during that time.  I want to inform everyone that I loved women.  I loved myself as well.  It is that I knew that college life was difficult for me.  I had to change my overall behavior in order to get accepted by other people.

 Moreover, I want to inform all of you that I asked God for a favor.  I asked God, could He Make Sure that I graduated from college?  God really listened to me.  I did graduate from college and relocated to Charlotte, NC.  I will admit that I was homeless by choice.  I was homeless in Charlotte, NC for 8 straight months.  I moved to Charlotte, NC on Sunday June, 15, 1997.  I lived at the Men’s Uptown Shelter for 8 straight months from June 17, 1997 to February 17, 1998.  I had to deal with a whole lot of personalities that were weigh worse off than me.  I dealt with it until January 5, 2010.  I lived in Charlotte, NC for 12 years.  I know that my past was not pleasant.  I had decided to accept my whereabouts and get strong!! 

Finally, I realized that my life was changing for the better.  I attended church on a regular basis.  I prayed to God for a Church Home that would be feasible for me.  Although I live inside of an environment that is not conducive towards my personal needs in Dayton, Ohio.  From January 6, 2010 until right now, I have been living in the Dayton, Ohio Area.  I live in the Northwest Side of Dayton, Ohio near Salem Avenue in Dayton, Ohio.  I have been living inside of my Apartment Complex Called Wentworth Hi Rise Apartments since January 5, 2011.  The neighborhood itself has changed tremendously since 2010.

In Conclusion, I have been going back and forth to the Library in the Dayton, Ohio Area.  I am at the Library at the moment.  I have been clean and sober since Wednesday May 2, 1990 to the Present.  I attend my meetings online because I am not physically able to attend meetings because I have too many physical and mental problems.  I have been chilling out as of late.  I suffer from Diabetes right now. 

My doctor prescribed me metformin 500mg per day before breakfast.  I have been taking metformin for over a week right now.  I will officially take metformin with my meals.  I know that having a lot of physical ailments had caused me to slow down completely.  Please keep me in your prayers and thoughts.  God Bless You

[bratshaws]

goodness gracious 75. brb x oc

a/n: I'll be honest I kinda based Chloe's whole schtick on a reddit thread I saw ages ago and it stuck to me. Does it make sense?? I hOPE?i t's just a sprinkle of angst yall nothing more uwu

check out the fic's playlist made by the sweet @wiipes !!

pairing: plus size!oc x rooster

warnings: light angst, FIRST FIGHT KIND OF???, then fluff

chapters:

1/2/3/4/5/6/7/8/9/10/11/12/13/14/15/16/17/18/19/20/21/22/23/24/25/26/27/28/29/30/31/32/33/34/35/36/37/38/39/40/41/42/43/44

45/46/47/48/49/50/51/52/53/54/55/56/57/58/59/60/61/62/63/64

65/66/67/68/69/70/71/72/73/74

(pls let me know if you want to be added to the taglist!!)

taglist: @mirandastuckinthe80s @roosterschanelslut @wiipes @lcahwriter @shrimping-for-all @gretagerwigsmuse @frenchtoastix

@lizzie-rdj @fanboyluvr @atarmychick007 @comebacktoearthpls

@peachiicherries @mak-32 @lizziespidiepridie @roosterswifey @ollyoxenfrees @piceous21 @sqrlgrl22 @hofficoffi @lexhalstead3 @lorilane33 @legendarydreamersharkparty @luckyladycreator2 @emilybradshaw @j-6o @louisahale @leobabbyyy @kulicny @winter-run @ktjmac @graciereads

-

Marcus did pay her, the exact amount he said he would and she was more than happy. Now she could not only get her car - the red Jeep wrangler she saw weeks ago - but she could also save this money for the moving day! Everything was running so smoothly, so nicely she could barely believe it. She’s been having a great week and when Friday rolled around, she was all smiles, so much it hurt her cheeks.

But one thing she found odd that day was how Rooster barely messaged her, well, less than normal, she knew he couldn’t talk much during work so this wasn’t so off. But it was fine! He was probably very busy! 

This Friday she had to show up at the Hard Deck earlier since they were going to reorganize some bottles that arrived later than Monday, it was fine to Beatrice, she could talk to Penny and Shells while working which was always fun. She wondered when she could tell them she was moving in with Rooster, since they did think about going out this Saturday to visit some places and check them out…so, Monday! Monday would be a good time.

Penny asks Beatrice to take some of the trash out and she does with a huge smile, Shells commenting how she had never seen someone so happy to take those giant black bags outside like Bea was. The brunette just ignored, humming all the way over to the trash bins down the sidewalk, her peripheral vision noticing a different car in the parking lot, a white one that she couldn’t identify because it was a bit distant.

But her eyes would wander back towards it every now and again, furrowing her brows as to why it’d be there in the first place considering it was so early in the afternoon – too early for any other cars to be there - considering the bar wasn’t even open yet. She did see a woman with brown hair step out, which in turn makes Beatrice blink, seeing her get closer and closer.

Maybe she was lost? It has happened before, people usually stop by the parking lot because they don’t know the region and they need help finding where to go. So Beatrice, with that assumption in her head, prepared her mind to remember street names and known spots for localization in the surroundings. What she didn’t expect was the woman coming closer, stopping a few steps away from her and suddenly saying her name, “Beatrice?”

She’s surprised, her brain then wracking all the memory files trying to remember if she knew this woman or not. “Um…yeah? Can I help you?”

The woman pulled out her sunglasses, they were the same height, with the same brown hair color but the differences were that the woman had light brown eyes and was skinnier than Beatrice, “...I was just curious,I’m Chloe.” That name brought nothing from her mind, which probably showed since Beatrice furrowed her eyebrows even more, “Chloe Ritzer.”

Again, nothing. Nothing appeared in her mind, “Oh…um…okay? Can I help you?” she repeats and the woman’s expression soured just enough to make Beatrice worry a bit, “I…I’m sorry, did we go to school together?”

“No.” comes her sticky sweet reply, “We did not, but I know someone that you know.”

Oh! Oh she probably knew her siblings or something like that, that explains why she couldn’t identify her name. “I’m surprised Rooster never told you about me.” Suddenly all the noise around Beatrice disappeared and a cold feeling took over her stomach, her confused look only worsening. 

“Oh…you were, friends?” Why would Rooster never tell her about this woman? The goblin voice in the back of her mind started to cackle menacingly, whispering doubts in her brain that she knew it wasn’t true.

Chloe, who had this weirdly smug look on her face after hearing that question, smirked, “Oh no, we were more than friends.” 

Wait, what? Bradley didn’t say he dated anyone before her, no he didn’t because Phoenix and Halo confirmed it too back when they got together. Beatrice’s mouth opens then closes, trying to digest this brand new information with her body going into fight of flight mode. “What do you mean more?”

“I’m just surprised,” she completely ignores the question, dropping her eyes down on Beatrice’s body and the brunette immediately feels like she needs to cover up, “That Rooster would…well, I didn’t think he was so desperate.” The words hit Bea harder than a slap.

“Excuse me?”

“I mean, you don’t really think he’d be interested in you right?” The pure venom coming out from this woman who she had never met nor seen before was already chipping in her confidence walls. She was acting like a bully already. “He just did because I moved out and he had to find a rebound.”

Rebound.

Beatrice’s wide eyes got even wider, her breathing turning erratic, “That’s not true.” she whispers, “How do you– why are you–” 

Ohohoho what did I tell you? You knew I was right, all along. You were nothing but a rebound, that’s what you are. Maybe that’s why he didn’t talk to you too much today, because he was seeing this woman again. She’s beautiful isn’t she? Skinny and model-esque. Not like you, you pathetic girl.

No. No this wasn’t happening, this wasn’t true! 

Beatrice’s deep inhale was shaky but she licked her lips before speaking, “...I’m not a rebound.” she whispers, her eyes slowly meeting the other woman’s “I-I don’t know who you are but if you two were together before, that was then and this is now.I am not a rebound.”

Neither the goblin voice nor the woman expected that response, with Chloe’s lip curling into a disgusted snarl, “Listen here, tubby,” Beatrice tried not to jolt at the insult, “I don’t know what sort of lie he’s been spewing your way but he’s not interested in you at all.”

“He doesn’t lie to me.” she snaps back, “...you don’t know him, if you did you’d know Rooster doesn’t lie.”

Shells steps out of the bar when her friend takes too long to come back, stopping by the doors when she sees the two brunettes face to face, “Aunt Penny.” she calls and her aunt appears right next to her, wrinkling her brows and muttering ‘who the hell is that?’ to her niece. But she holds Shells back when the blonde tries to step closer, ready to defend her friend from this random strange woman they’ve never seen before.

“He’s a man, he’s going to lie.”

Beatrice feels her fury getting worse and worse, “No.” she snarls, “He’s not, you–how long were you two together?” Chloe opens her mouth to reply but Beatrice cuts her off, “If it’s more than one day you’d know that Rooster doesn’t lie, he was raised right, he is loving and he’s kind…”

Realization hits her immediately.

She wasn’t one of his girlfriends. She was one of the hookups he said he had before. “...that’s why you don’t know, you were with him for one day.” Chloe’s face turned angry, Beatrice struck a very visible nerve apparently, “...You– are you serious? You, you think that making up stuff about my boyfriend,” again another flinch coming from Chloe,”About how he’s apparently never loved me when we’ve been together for seven months and are currently thinking about moving in together?? What the fuck is wrong with you?”

Chloe’s smug attitude dropped slowly, no doubt she was thinking she could manipulate Beatrice into thinking Rooster wasn’t interested–which backfired immensely- “I–you—”

“What the fuck!! What the fuck are you doing?” she hated how her personality reminded her of the Bitch Trio, maybe that was also why she was getting so fired up about her. That and the goblin voice trying to repeat over and over how it was right. If this was a few months back, maybe she’d be leaning towards it, maybe she’d doubt herself and her place in their relationship…but not now. Not now. “...You think he doesn’t love me or are you projecting your own fears on me? Because what you guys had was nothing more than a one night stand?”

“It was a great–”

“If it was he’d done something else about it,” Beatrice snaps, straightening her back and holding back a smile at how she was now taller than Chloe, “If it was why wouldn’t he be with you?...I am not a rebound. He loves me and if you have a problem with that I am sorry, I am so sorry but nothing will change it.`` Another car pulls to the parking lot, an SUV she knows too well and Evelyn’s body is already out and marching over. 

“Listen tub–”

“No! You listen! My name is Beatrice. My name is Beatrice Schiavoni and” every word she gives a step forward and Chloe a step back, “And you dare, you fucking dare to come out of the woodworks accusing my boyfriend of being a liar when you know him for less than a few hours??” Chloe’s shoes hit the edge of the sidewalk, almost losing her balance, “And a one night stand??A hook up?? Rooster would never, he would never say what he doesn’t mean and if you– how fucking long was this? Almost a year ago? Two? And you kept the thought he wouldn’t move on?”

Chloe was looking smaller and smaller, Evelyn sending Shells and Penny a surprised look, “How fucking dare you??” Beatrice looked ready to beat the shit out of Chloe, not even because of her but because she was saying stuff about Rooster, “I don’t know what your plan here was, Chloe Ritzer.” Evelyn’s head snaps up when she hears the name, this time really getting closer to the two, “But you–”

“Chloe Ritzer?” Evelyn repeats, “You are the data analyst who was transferred out of state.” 

Beatrice’s chest heaved with her intense breathing,looking back at Evelyn with her eyebrows furrowed then to Chloe whose eyes were now doubled in size, “Yeah,yeah I remember my dad saying something about you, about how you were asked to transfer because you pulled some bullshit around the base.”

“How the fuck does your dad know anything about me??”

“He’s a vice-admiral.” Chloe paled, immediately, her eyes now only focusing on Evelyn, “And if I call him right now and let him know that you are here and he contacts your superiors, they would know you are here now, right?”

Beatrice watched with wide eyes, not believing what she was hearing. The fact this woman came from out of nowhere just to get something out of Rooster was insane. How did she even pull this off? Better yet, what did she think it’d happen? Chloe just looked surrounded, which she was, especially when Penny and Shells got closer too, the three women forming a barricade behind Beatrice that signaled that Chloe was at a huge disadvantage there. 

Seeing that this was a battle she could no longer win, which honestly she never did, Chloe slowly backed away, muttering she was ‘sorry for bothering them’ and ran to her car, almost hitting another one when she reversed out of the parking lot, disappearing from view. “What the fuck just happened?” Shells asked, looking at Beatrice, “Did she threaten you or something?”

“She was just badmouthing me and telling me lies…just,trying–I don’t know what her endgame was, but it was…weird.”

“Should we call the cops on her?” Shells asks Evelyn who is looking down at her phone, typing something quickly - undoubtedly letting her father know what just happened.

“No. I just texted my dad, he can deal with it for us.” Evelyn’s eyes softened, “Are you okay Bea?”

Was she? She was a bit…she didn’t know how to feel about what just happened. Yes, she was nervous at first but then she was so angry, she was so mad because this woman who had nothing to do with her life nor Rooster’s wanted to…intrude? Act up? For what? “I’m…I’m fine…It’s just, I feel a bit dizzy.” all that anger and fury probably dropped her blood pressure or something because she was feeling really woozy. Penny stepped up to Bea and ordered Shells to hold her other arm as they brought her back inside the bar.

They sat her down in one of the booths, Penny rubbing the back of Beatrice’s hand as Shells rushed out of the area to get some sugar water. Beatrice rubs her forehead with her palm heel,clenching her eyes and enduring the heavy toll her body had to deal with emotionally, her head pumping with a violent headache that only made things worse, “She’s done this before.” comes Evelyn’s voice, which makes both Penny and Beatrice turn their eyes her way, “According to my dad, she was interested in another guy before, didn’t work out, she tried showing up again and getting him back. It was never violent, she was never violent, but this shit isn’t going to go over well.”

Shells come back with a white mug filled with water, her aunt giving her a confused look but accepting it anyway, ‘There you go,Bea. Take…little sips.” she waits until the brunette brings the mug to her lips, scrunching her face at the pure sugar hitting her tongue, setting it down after just a few gulps. While the other women talked amongst themselves, Beatrice couldn’t help but repeat the weird events that happened seconds before.

This woman, this Chloe, showed up as if she was Bradley’s ex-girlfriend or something serious like that and tried to belittle her, belittle Bradley saying he was a liar and making her think he was with her out of pity?? The goblin voice crackled in the back of her mind, whispered growly voices making it’s way over her ear, planting doubt after doubt inside her brain. But it made no sense, because Rooster wasn’t like that, he wasn’t like that at all and he has proven that time and time again!

Then why was she having weird thoughts about it? Why was the goblin voice of doubt being louder than every other? Why was she questioning this? She hated it, so much and she knew she’d have to talk to Bradley about it because he'd definitely see if something was off with her. Would he be upset? How would he react? God she was so nervous, she only hoped that later tonight when they went back to his apartment they could have a good talk about this.

-

He wasn’t so different when he got to the bar, he greeted her as he normally would, he smiled at her like he normally would…but when they got back to his apartment, he got very quiet and his face seemed to stone in a mid frown that never disappeared. Even Jolene’s presence there didn’t seem to ease it and it got worse every time he looked at his phone.

Beatrice only stood by a distance, biting her lower lip watching his back move as he pulled his Hawaiian shirt from his body, folding in his hands, “Brad,” she calls and he stops, looking back at her with an inquisitive glance, “Are you okay?”

He inhales deeply, his smile not quite meeting his eyes, “Long day, gorgeous.” he says in a clipped tone, “Long, long day.” she chews her lower lip again, watching him rub his hands over his face and sighing against his palms. Beatrice wrung her hands together, unsure on how to tell him without making his day worse so she chose that it’d be better to help him unwind a little bit.

“Do you want to talk about it?”

Bradley rolls his lips into his mouth, his hands propped on his hips with another inhale going down his nose, “You know, I don’t think so.” that was weird, he usually wants to share if something is bothering him, “I don’t–” he shakes his head, not finishing the sentence.

Oh I wonder what could’ve happened to him. Maybe he saw that girl again and noticed he still had feelings for her and doesn't know how to tell you about it.

That wasn’t true. Bradley isn’t like that. “Are you sure?” she asks softly, watching how his shoulders tensed up and his body went rigid, but his face wasn’t turned towards her.

“I am very sure.” he says curtly, “I really don’t want to talk about it,Bea.”

Beatrice swallowed her saliva nervously, the sharp claw of fear and anxiety climbing up her spine as she watched Rooster disappear into his kitchen to get something. Maybe it was just work stuff he couldn’t tell her. Maybe that was why he was like that. She follows him into the kitchen, a glass of water being chugged down in harsh gulps until he thunked the glass on the sink, leaning his weight on it.

She didn’t know what to do and the doubtful voices in her head weren’t helping. “Do you want to order something?” she asks softly, stepping closer to him and disliking how he was walling himself up but choosing to not prod about it, “I know it’s late but I think that we can get some pizzas.” 

Bradley clears his throat, bringing his fingers to the bridge of his nose where he rubbed it in slow circles, “Yeah. Sure.I can do pizzas.” his clipped tone was unnerving her more and more, it wasn’t helping her anxiety and fear with him acting like that. 

Because he’s thinking how to break it to you that he no longer wants to be in a relationship with you…tubby.

No. That wasn’t true. It wasn’t true. 

“Okay…I’ll…order it then.” The silence usually wasn’t uncomfortable like this and Beatrice didn’t know what to do. Her emotions had flared up ever since that afternoon and she felt she wouldn’t be able to keep it in for long. She didn’t want to make him even more upset with the information that…his ex-hookup showed up and tried belittling her like that. His ex-hookup that was…tall and skinny, looking like a brunette Gisele Bündchen with how perfect she was.

But wait, no she wasn’t perfect. She was just skinnier than Beatrice was and that didn’t mean that Beatrice’s body was wrong. She just did a photo shoot using swimwear and other clothing she’d never admit she thought about wearing before, so she wasn’t wrong. Her body wasn’t wrong and he loved her and her body.

Oh, but what if you’ve been mistaken?

She wasn’t mistaken, not about Rooster…not about how he feels when it comes to her. But the way he was acting right now was…really bothering her too much. He was never this quiet, he was never this brooding with her, “Roos.” she calls softly, following him out of the kitchen, where he stops by the hallway, “You know you can talk to me if something is bothering you,right?”

Bradley’s jaw moves, but he doesn’t speak, “I know.” was all he said, “Don’t worry about it.”

“It’s just…well you are very quiet and I worry–”

“There’s nothing to worry about,Beatrice.” he doesn’t raise his voice, but he does sound snappy, ‘Whatever it is I’ll resolve it. There are some things that I have to do alone and I don’t need your help with.”

Oh.

“...oh.” was all she could reply, her mind going hundred miles a minute with all the fears and possibilities. He changed his mind about them, everything was right, she was wrong, everything was falling apart, she wasn’t deserving of happiness nor deserving of him, “...okay…” 

Bradley sighs,running his hand down his face and muttering a ‘be right back’ as he steps into his room and then the ensuite bathroom, locking the door behind him. He puts his hands over his eyes, pacing around his bathroom as he tries to control his temper, trying to forget that Chloe showed up out of nowhere and decided to message him. He was sure he blocked her, he was sure he cut all contact.

God he was so pissed when she started suggesting things for them to do, as if they were just on a ‘break’ and he wasn’t dating Beatrice. He walked around his office just like he was now, trying to ease out the anger and annoyance. It took him so long to finally cut her off he didn’t even talk to Beatrice - lunch break was over and he was still getting rid of Chloe’s constant messages since just blocking her clearly wasn’t going to work.

Then he got mad because he wasted so much time getting rid of her he could barely say two words to Beatrice and then he fucked some stuff up - he also lost his favorite pen - and he had to take a few breathing breaks. Then at the bar, while he was still angry, seeing his girlfriend helped him calm down a little but he just kept thinking on how to tell Beatrice about Chloe and how to deal with this.

…speaking of which, he shouldn’t have acted like that with her. Beatrice wasn’t at fault for what happened and he should’ve just told her about it instead of locking himself in his bathroom and leaving her alone, “Fuck.” he groans against his hands, thinking how much this Chloe just bothered him to the point he was getting angry at people who had nothing to do with it, instead of her. 

He took a few more calming breaths, hoping that Beatrice wasn’t too upset for him snapping at her like that - God, he never once did that to her, what was he fucking thinking? He gives him a look on the mirror, then leans down to open the faucet and wash his face the best he could, breathing out by his mouth before he steps out of the bathroom, “Bea,” he calls, walking past his bedroom’s threshold, “Bea, baby I’m sorry for–”

Where was she?

She was right in his living room when he went inside. Matter of fact, where was Beatrice and Jolene? The pittie wasn’t in her favored spot on the couch either. Bradley moved his eyes anxiously, she was probably in the kitchen, yes, she was going to order pizzas- she’s not in the kitchen either. 

He tries not to panic, he couldn’t see her bag there either so…wait, did she leave? “Fuck, no,no no no.” he stomps his way to his front door, looking down the hallway and towards the elevators. His eyes widened seeing the numbers going down, “No, no no!Fuck! “ he doesn’t even bother to wait for the other one, he slams the fire escape door open and runs down the stairs, checking every floor to see if he still had time to reach her.

No, no, this couldn’t be happening. Beatrice couldn’t be leaving. Not like this, he had to tell her what happened! “Please, let me reach her. Please.” he ignored his throat burning and how his chest ached from running down the steps all the way down to the lobby. He has to take a quick break before he reaches the last door, yanking it open to check. Someone else was entering the elevator now, both of them, so Beatrice already left!

He had to hurry. He ran all the way outside, breathing heavily and looking around in hopes to see her down the street. She didn’t have a car, so she probably called an uber…but there were no cars, well, there was one, but it was now driving away from him– his keys, he needed to get his keys, “Fuck!” he once again didn’t take the elevator, going all the way back by the fire escape stairs, shouldering the door to his floor open.

His white tee was sticking to his back and chest, but he couldn’t care about it right now. He just inhaled shakily once he got to his apartment door, leaning on his hand to regain his breathing, “Okay,” he says between gulps of air, “Okay, I need my keys.” he wipes some beads of sweat that traveled down his temple and his cheekbones. He was starting to panic, what did he do? God, what did he do? He shouldn’t have said that. Why did he say that?

Where the fuck were his keys? He patted his jeans, then his tee - that had no pockets - cursing high and low. “Where the fuck are they, where the– excuse me a minute Jojo.” he steps over the tail wagging pitbull to reach the other side of the room…then he pauses. He pauses and slowly looks back to where Jolene now was, seated on her favorite spot in his couch, his eyes widening, “Wait, how are you here?”

“Roos?”

Was he dreaming? Was he imagining things? Because that was Beatrice’s voice. He looks up to the hallway, seeing Beatrice holding her bag in her hands, her eyebrows low and confused, “...Bea.You are here.”

The brunette’s eyes turn sadder, looking away from him, “...s-should I not be?”

“What? No!” He crosses the room in two strides, wrapping his arms around Beatrice so tight she drops her bag to the floor in surprise, her hands slowly coming up to touch his damp shoulder blades.

“Roos, why are you so sweaty? What happened?” she asked against his neck, blinking her big green eyes in surprise when he pulled back to smack her lips soundly, over and over, the girl’s face turning such a violent shade of red she looked ready to melt. “Roos- Roos what’s happ-” but his lips kept on hers, cupping her warm cheeks in his big hands, before he drops them to her thighs where he picks her up and carries her back to his bedroom. She barely has time to speak, between his lips on hers and the sudden shock of being carried over, she presses a hand to his wet and warm chest, pushing him the best she could.

He does break the kiss, but he keeps his face right above hers. “...Roos…wh-what is happening? Why are you drenched with sweat? Are you sick?” 

“I…” the weight of his sudden workout finally hit him and he felt his chest heave out breath after breath “I…I thought you left, so I…I ran in hopes to get you. I’m sorry.”

“Rooster…why would I leave? I’m not understanding…”

“I snapped at you and you had nothing to do with what happened.” realization shone on her eyes, the same eyes that looked away from his ashamedly, her hand dropping from his chest to land on her stomach.

“I shouldn’t have pestered you–” 

He shakes his head negatively, closing his eyes, “No. No this isn’t your fault.” he says gently, “I shouldn’t have done that. I…I was mad about something else and I just let it out on you and it was unfair.” her eyes return to his, hesitantly so, but he’s glad she’s looking at him again. “Pretty girl, you know I don’t get mad at you for worrying about me.”

Beatrice chews her lower lip, he could see the worry still in her eyes, in those big green eyes he fell in love with, “It’s just…you were acting weird and I thought…I thought I did something wrong.” that I was no longer good enough, she thinks, “And I…I guess my day has been kinda messy too so…”

“No, you didn’t do anything wrong, gorgeous. You didn’t, hey,” he cups her chin when she looks away, arching both of his eyebrows for emphasis, “You didn’t do anything wrong…I’m sorry for snapping at you. I really am.”

Beatrice takes a long while to reply, so long he almost feels she won’t do so, but she nods “I forgive you.” she whispers, which makes Rooster sigh out in relief, dropping his face to her neck where he breathed in her lavender scent - calmness and devotion - kissing the curve of her shoulder. “Do you want…to tell me what happened?”

He lifts his head from her neck, then looks over his shoulder to his bathroom, “Yeah but…maybe I might need to take a bath first…join me?” he didn’t like how she seemed to go back to hesitation, “If you don’t want it’s okay.”

“No,no I do.” she whispers, ‘It might help me get my mind out of things too.” she replies, giving him a small smile and following him when he stood up, offering her his hand. She grabs with the same smile, closing her eyes when he leans closer to kiss her forehead, then her lips one more time, leading them to the bathroom.

[akusaimonth]

[ID in alt]

AkuSaiMonth 2022: July 8 - August 7

Welcome to AkuSaiMonth! A month of celebrating AkuSai & LeaIsa! It's been a hard two years, but at least ASM is back, this time with a new host (and with permission of the original creator)!

AkuSaiMonth 2022 Bingo

Similar to 2015, we will be playing bingo again, but this time with a twist: The bingo cards are randomized! Every participant will have their prompts in 1 of 30 different arrangements!

Where can I get the Bingo Card?

To claim your personal AkuSaiMonth 2022 Bingo card, click >> HERE! << Using the link on the same device and browser should (in theory) always lead to the same card. However, I would strongly recommend also saving the card by either using the print button on top or by making a screenshot.

Text-to-Speech-friendly bingo cards are available here: LINK. These are not randomized unfortunately, but you can still pick one (of three) at random! Please let me know if you run into any problems!

See the end of the post for a plain text list of the prompts in alphabetical order.

And here is one example Bingo card: You can use this one as well of course, but give the randomized cards a chance!

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How does it work?

The goal is to get one "Bingo!" during the month (Jul 7 – Aug 8) by filling 5 prompts in a row, column or diagonal. 

This could mean one post every week, for example:

Post 1: Friday, July 8 (IsaLea Day)

Post 2: Saturday, July 16

Post 3: Saturday, July 23

Post 4: Sunday, July 31

Post 5: Sunday, August 7 (AkuSai Day) -> Bingo! <3

You are of course allowed to do less than five prompts (one is perfectly fine! <3) or even fill out the entire bingo card (I wish I had your time management skills)!

Rules:

Posting Rules

Tag your works as #akusaimonth and #asm22

Mention @akusaimonth, so I can't miss your work!

You can fill as many prompts as you want at whatever schedule works for you!

The goal is to achieve one "Bingo", but this is meant as motivation only; it's not an obligation or restriction!

You can start and end your participation at any time!

Content Rules

All forms of content are allowed, including but not limited to fanfiction, fanart, edits, videos, music, …

The "/" in some prompts means you can use either or multiple of the terms

All prompts are open for interpretation, there's no right or wrong way to use any of them!

You can stay within the framework of canon or create AUs or crossovers or whatever you want, everything is great!

All content has to be made by you! Stolen fan work is NOT allowed.

If you want to include fan content made by other people in your edit/video/… you have to get permission first and add credit to the original creator/s!

Official material can be used with no restrictions

NSFW Rules

NSFW is allowed!

Please post visual NSFW under a "Read More"

NSFW content will be reblogged with an #nsfw tag

FAQ

Who is behind the event? Original creator and host from 2014 – 2019 is the wonderful @misomilk! This year's host is @herzblutrose

I lost my card! If you remember your Bingo Card ID, then that's absolutely no problem. Let me know and I'll give you a permalink to the card you pulled!

What does prompt (...) mean? It means whatever you want it to mean! Have fun with it!

Other questions? Send me an ask!

Plain text prompts in alphabetical order:

Animals

Beach

Breakfast

Dark / Light

Fingers Running Through Hair

Flowers / Garden

Free Space

Gala / Ball

Holding While the Other Cries

Home

Keepsake / Precious Memory

Nobodies / Somebodies

Past / Present / Future

[Quote from the games]

Shopping

Skateboarding / Sports

Smoke and Mirrors

[Song Lyrics]

Sun & Moon / Fire & Water

Tales / Stories

Tarot / Cards

Tears / Scars

Thunderstorm

Whispers / Dreaming

You Have Changed

[losingitinjersey]

Happy due date, Aug! 

As you can see from the pictures, Erp and Aug met each other for the first time at the hospital!  My mom brought Erp over with her (you can tell she was dressed by her with the huge bow and fancy shoes) and it was SO GREAT to see my girl again!!  I’ve never had this much time away from her and I couldn’t get enough of her hugs and cuddles.  She was curious but cautious of her sister but continued to share her toys and books with her!  Although, every time Aug cried, Erp would shrink into herself and start crying as well, crawling into my arms for comfort.  My heart!  

On Friday at noon, 53 hours of being in the hospital and sitting in that increasingly uncomfortable bed, we were all packed up, dressed and ready to be discharged only to learn that Aug didn’t pass her hearing test on her left ear.  We were told we had to stay for four more hours for her to retake the test.  Defeated, disappointed and worried, we tucked in, napped and waited out those hours only to have her not pass a third time.  The hospital pediatrician wasn’t worried and said we’d just need to follow up with an audiologist in 4 to 6 weeks to see what’s going on.  By 6 p.m. that night, 59 hours in total at the hospital, we were finally on our way back home.  

We’ve now had over 24 hours at home with all five of us (my mom, Kevin, Erp, Aug and myself) and, I gotta say, I’m SO happy to be out of the hospital and adjusting to life at home.  

The first night at home (Friday the 13th) was rough.  I was emotionally and physically exhausted, desperate to create and cling to a routine that made sense.  But since Aug needs to feed every three hours (from the start of the feeding, and each feeding takes at least 30 minutes), there’s not much time in-between each session.  Kevin asked me if we could supplement with formula to give myself time to rest and not being responsible for each feeding but I refused.  Sure, my milk hasn’t come in yet but I wanted to do it all myself and work hard at feeding and getting my supply going through all the feedings.  I got maybe two hours sleep the first night.  

On Saturday morning, Kevin, Aug and I drove the hour and a half to our pediatrician in Norfolk to have her check out the babe.  She was very concerned about her weight loss and told us we need to immediately start supplementing with formula.  Like, had to do a bottle right there in the office in front of her and to give her 2oz of formula every three hours on top of breastfeeding. We have a follow-up appointment on Monday and Wednesday for weight-checks.  While I was disappointed to hear my girl, who was already a better at breastfeeding than Erp, wasn’t getting enough food.  Since this information was told to me by the pediatrician and not by my husband, I had no qualms about it and just want to make my girl healthy.  

The rest of the day went well.  I was able to nap AND shower!  First time in four days!  I was a new woman!  My mom asked me what she could buy me as a small gift of celebration - if I wanted a cake or ice cream or something.  Hands down, totally asked for a big dinner from Jersey Mike’s sub sandwiches.  Best decision ever.  That night my hormones got the best of me when my mom and Kevin decided to prioritize my sleep over everything else and basically sent me to bed at 9:30 p.m. telling me not to get back up until my shift at 6 a.m.  Oh, and also, that Kevin wanted Aug to try to sleep in her crib in the nursery with Erp (in her own crib) that night.  That decision was something I wasn’t ready to process and I tail-spinned from there.  I knew my hormones and lack of sleep were getting the best of me as I desperately tried to explain my feelings and try to help out more. Eventually, I just went to bed and hoped for the best, trusting my husband and mom were capable and just trying to do the best thing for me (even though *I* thought the best thing for me was to help out more, not sleep). (Also, the room sharing only lasted maybe five minutes before Aug started crying and needed to be removed from the room).  

Day three at home, Sunday/today, has been amazing so far.  Even though I was awake for two hours during the night, I did get a total of six hours and had a really great morning solo with Aug.  This was probably the most time she and I have spent one-on-one with each other and it was so needed.  I woke up at 6, by 6:30 I was breastfeeding her, by 7 I was feeding her a bottle.  By 7:30 she was down for a nap and I was pumping.  By 8 I got Erp up and loved having a solo morning with her, it was so good for us both!  By 8:30 I was finally able to make myself a delicious breakfast of avocado toast, fried eggs and french pressed coffee.  My mom was up at the same time so she was entertaining Erp while I got to eat in peace.  It was just the morning I needed.  Having that time with both girls one-on-one, but also at times together and having everything go well was so healing. 

Oh, and on top of everything else mentioned above, my feet have become horribly swollen thanks to the 3L of IV fluid pushed through my body and my face is incredibly puffy.  The breastfeeding cramps are brutal this time around and my nipples hate me. Desperately looking forward to a few weeks from now when, hopefully, my body has recovered more.  

Looking forward to continuing to find peace in structure and creating a routine that works well for us all.  While my free time is few and far between (especially when you throw in a very needy/grouchy cat into the mix who’s horribly being neglected despite my best efforts), I continue to find bright moments of joy in this new world of parenthood.  

[sugiwa]

Hi. I am the Advice Anon. Please ignore those asks! I am so sorry for spamming your ask box. I still need help, so I’ll paste the entire thing over here. Again, sorry and thank you! Have a great day!

My reply and the full ask are below:

Hello! I hope you’ve been having a great day so far. This is probably unlike all of the other asks you get on a daily basis, author. However, I am in dire need of help, and I have turned to you. Before I begin, I want to apologize in advance, as this ask is going to be long. Now, like I said before, I need some help. You see, I am a freshman in high school, and school hasn’t even been going on for a full 10 weeks (a quarter), and I am already in a huge, messy, sticky situation. You probably already know that in high school, you need a certain number of credits in each field to be able to graduate. I am going to be extremely vague about this because it doesn’t really matter, and I’d really like to remain anonymous, if you know what I mean. One of the fields is World Languages and Visual Arts. Obviously, I am not talented enough to do Visual Arts, so I opted for World Languages instead. My teacher for the course I chose this year… she’s nice. Really kind, and I love that she makes learning a whole new language and culture, which is extremely hard, so much fun. And the fact that she’s one of the nicest teachers I know makes the rest of this so, so painful for me. 4 days ago, for me, was a Thursday. In this class, we had a vocab quiz that day (background info: two days before every quiz, my teacher posts a practice quiz to be done before class starts). I don’t really want to discuss what happened, as it still brings tears to my eyes, but I will give you a vague summary of what was going on. Basically, I couldn’t access my quiz (it was online), so my teacher told me to come in after school to re-do it. I was supposed to close down my computer and work on homework from another class, but instead of doing so, I worked on the practice quiz. And… this was considered cheating, because I was getting extra practice in before taking the quiz– something that the other students didn’t get, you know? My teacher saw my computer screen, and told me that she’d talk to me after school, and she’d be calling home. I couldn’t concentrate for the rest of the class, because I was afraid of what might happen when she called home. After school, she told me to speak with her, and be honest about it. When cheating happens, at our school, the teacher will write us up for Academic Dishonesty and give it to the administration, who then decides the consequences. My teacher had told me that if I was honest with her, she wouldn’t write my up; she’d just give me a zero on the quiz and call home and tell them what I did. I was honest with her, because like I said before, I was afraid. Once I told her everything that happened, she told me that I could call home, let them know what happened myself, and I’d be off the hook (with a zero on the quiz, of course). So, I called home, like she had asked of me, but… they didn’t pick up. I told her that they didn’t pick up, and she told me that it was fine, and that she’d talk to my parents in-person before they picked me up from school. I’m not going to lie, that terrified me more than calling home. I don’t really remember what happened after that, because I was too busy crying, but I do remember that she mentioned something about me doing this before, and that it was not OK to do it the second time, but she’d let me off the hook. The thing is, I am 100% sure I haven’t done this before… or maybe she just didn’t approach me the first time. I told her that I didn’t do this before, and she told me that I was lying again, and began to write me up. I told her that I didn’t mean to do this, and that I was sorry, but she told me to stop lying. She said that she DID approach me the first time I did this, and that I was rude to her then. This brought tears to my eyes– my kind of favorite teacher telling me that I was rude to her. You see, I didn’t grow up here, and although I’ve lived here for 4 years, I am not used to the way people interact here. It was very different where I grew up. For example, you didn’t ask each other how their day was, or what they did during their day, unless you were REALLY curious or concerned, because that was considered nosy and rude. So, I tend to be unintentionally rude, and completely oblivious to it; I have no idea when I’m being rude or not, unless someone specifically says so. I also don’t really understand people well, so that’s a huge problem. So… hearing this from her, really hurt. I told her that I didn’t intend to be rude, and I was trying my best to change (I mean, I was & am reading a book to teach me etiquette and all), and she replied with “that’s good to hear”. Then, when my parents came to pick me up, she talked to them, and even asked one of my parents to walk with us to the Administration Office to turn in the write up. Stuff happened, I got called into the Assistant Principal’s office, and now I have a zero on my quiz (and my homework activity that I never finished), Saturday School, and a black mark on my record. But the thing is… that’s not what I’m concerned about at all. Sure, getting my grades up in time for Progress Reports is going to be an extremely hard task, and Saturday School is going to leave a huge black mark on my record, but that’s not what I’m worried about. My grades have been fractured, but so has my relationship with this teacher. I feel as though she hates me now, that she has lost all trust in me. (Background info: our school does Odd and Even days, so I have half of my classes on one day and half on the other, so that means that I didn’t face my teacher at all on Friday) 3 days ago, on Friday, when I went to school, it was an average day. It would have been an amazing day, had it not been for the situation I was in. All I could think about that day was my World Language teacher. And just thinking about her, and about that classroom, it… gives me a bit of anxiety. This is where I need your help. What would you do if you were in my situation? I really want to repair my relationship with my teacher, because I know that she’s really important; we’re going to be on the same campus for the next 4 years of my life, and even more importantly, she’s going to be my teacher for the next 8 months. I want to graduate with good grades, but more importantly, I want to graduate without holding a grudge against my teacher. I want her to like me, and I want to gain her trust again. Today is a Sunday for me, and I have to go back to school tomorrow, and I have her class then. A part of me is really scared to go to school, a part of me is really angry at my teacher for reporting me (even though it was the right thing to do), and a part of me wants to ditch school tomorrow, or even drop out or transfer from her course, all because I don’t want to face her after I did the wrong thing. It’s not only that, either. I’ve also been avoiding my friends. Would you like to know why I am confiding in awesome strangers on the internet anonymously instead of letting my friends know what’s going on? It’s because I’m afraid that they won’t like me anymore, and they’d ditch me or something. They’re amazing people, and I know that they won’t do that, but a part of me is still paranoid. I’ve been avoiding my friends since Friday, barely talking to them at school, and texting them a little bit in our group chat. They don’t really suspect anything, but that’s good. And that’s why I am asking you. Not just you, but actually anyone who sees this, if they helped me, I’d really appreciate it. I really need help moving forward in this situation, and I’m desperate for help. My parents don’t understand the situation I’m in, and I’m too scared to talk to my friends about it, so I’d really appreciate the help. It’s OK if you don’t reply to this, author. I know that this doesn’t affect you in any way, so you’re not obliged to help me. I’d like to thank you for taking the time from your day to read these extremely long asks. Have a great day. P.S: I absolutely love What Heroes Do! Izumi is such a well written character, and sometimes, I see myself in her. The way she handles situations is so inspirational! And your writing skills are top-tier! My best friend and I actually started writing a book 4 years ago (I mean, we wrote for one month in 6th grade, and then spent one day in 8th grade editing it, and we’ve only got a prologue and 1.5 chapters done, so… clearly, we aren’t doing a good job lol), and you’ve inspired me to go back to that book and re-do it! Thank you so much for being such an inspiration and an idol of mine! Ilysm ❤️

sugiwa:

I wanted to take the  proper time to reply to this. I think any adult willing to hold a grudge against a child is in the wrong. You clearly made a mistake and are now taking steps to improve and learn from it. Additionally, I think teachers tend to forget how much stress students are under in their academic and private lives, so a mistake should be used as an opportunity to teach not punish. I don’t think that you should worry about what this teacher thinks of you. Your teacher didn’t believe you, despite you telling them the truth. No matter how kind or nice someone is, their behavior towards you will always reflect their inner thoughts. If you’ve clearly made a mistake, you should fight to prove that. It’s not as if you intended to ‘cheat,’ given the situation we’re all in with the pandemic, online classes and quizzes are the norm. These kinds of things probably happen regularly. Additionally. I don’t think you need to concern yourself with being rude. My culture is rather blunt and when I first moved here, people weren’t fans of brutal honesty, so it was a big cultural shock.  If people aren’t willing to learn about your culture and understand, then I don’t think they’re people worth hanging out with. Lean on your friends, I don’t think they’d make a big deal over a couple of mistakes and if they do, then it might be worth reconsidering why you were friends with them. 

Thank you for your kind words about the story and I really hope everything works out for you!!

[songofsaraneth]

Ok now that I have time/space to breathe again, I wanted to do a writeup on the unusual reaction I had to the second Covid vaccine dose. I debated posting this, because I don't want to go against the "I was vaccinated and it's fine!" encouragement train. And I 1000% encourage EVERYONE to get vaccinated if possible. But I have not seen much documentation of the averse symptom I got, except in some case studies I specifically looked up so details below. Big TMI/gross warning however. 

Mostly I'm posting this because I had to do SO much self-advocating/arguing with the Dr at my urgent care clinic, and if you're not as read up on weird medical issues as I am, you might not be comfortable doing that. But IANAD, just describing my experience and what I read, which ended up being very long because it was awful and I have a lot to complain about I guess, sorry.

Basically: for me the vaccine triggered an inflammation response, which in itself is normal. The usual muscle aches/joint pain/slight fever. It also triggered an outbreak of ulcers in my soft tissues. Basically, a bunch of canker sores in my mouth/throat. I am already prone to getting these when I get sick or stressed out, so no biggie, annoying and painful but I could handle them. Canker sores are distinct from cold sores in that they form inside the mouth as crater spots, usually around the size of a pencil eraser (though can be bigger or smaller), and will develop a white film across the crater as they develop and start to heal.

An unfortunate fact I have learned: the mouth is not the only exposed “soft tissue” of the body. this group also includes genitals.

So 2 days after the vaccine I noticed a "burning sensation"/rawness downstairs, which turned into a sharp pain, especially when going to the bathroom. I obviously knew this was abnormal and because of what was happening in my mouth, had a pretty firm idea of what was happening, but was ready to brace myself through the healing process. However by day 5 I had 8 red, crater-like sores on the tissue of my vulva. Essentially they are open wounds, and urine is an acid, so you can imagine the hell that using the bathroom had become. Even just sitting hurt.

As someone healthcare-averse, even I knew this was untenable, and went to Urgent Care for the first time in my adult life. I told the NP what was going on, how they matched the canker sores (NOT cold sores) in my mouth in onset/form--and she immediately, without even looking, diagnosed me with herpes.

Lots of people have herpes or other STIs, and that's fine. I know I do not have any, and wanted to pursue treatment for what I was sure they were--Non-sexually acquired genital ulceration (NSGU). I had even found three case studies of COVID patients who had developed them. I had spent several harrowing hours on google images making sure that the sores I had did not match any STI I may have magically acquired during a year of social distancing. I even brought up multiple case studies, including a woman who had them as a Covid reaction in a neighboring state. Didn’t matter. She looked at them and went “Yikes! Herpes!” and prescribed me: 

1) an antiviral, which I said I did not think would do anything because the trigger for this was a vaccine not an illness. She said it was probably a herpes flare up already in my system. I reiterated that I have had similar sores in my mouth since childhood and that all my past doctors and dentists agreed it was not viral but something related to an immune response. She said the antivirals should clear them up in a few days.

2) a topical 5% lidocaine ointment, aka an oral grade numbing gel, which was essentially what I was after anyway.

I would have preferred a steroid course to the antiviral, but agreed to start taking them until she got the results of the bloodwork I needed to come in the next day for. I asked how many days after taking them I would expect to see a difference/if she would reevaluate treatment if they didn’t have an effect in a certain amount of time, and she said if they hadn’t cleared up by Monday then she’d look into other causes (spoiler, they did nothing in that 4 day span). to her credit, when she saw me pick up my bike helmet (because my car had been at the mechanic for a month by then), she was properly horrified that i was having to bike everywhere with this situation and printed off some coupons/called all the prescriptions into the grocery store pharmacy next door instead of the CVS my insurance likes a mile away.

So eventually I got home and took my pill & went to put on the ointment so I could use the bathroom for the first time in 8 hours. I’ll spare you the details but suffice to say I had an extremely, overwhelmingly painful 10 minutes of application. Like absolutely awful burning feeling. However once that faded, I was indeed actually numb, and so I figured it was worth it. Got my bloodwork done on Friday (biking there & home again). On Saturday, I thought that you know, maybe a prescription anesthetic shouldn’t be doing that or at least have some sort of warning? And read the details on the jar.

Good things about lidocaine: it is a powerful numbing agent and lasts pretty well for an hour or two.

Bad things about lidocaine: you cannot get oral grade lidocaine without added mint flavoring.

I happen to be EXTREMELY sensitive to mint. Like I still can’t handle breath mints or mouthwash, and used bubblegum flavored toothpaste until I was 14 and found a brand with half as much mint flavoring as is typical. Even if you’re not, mint has no business being anywhere near genital tissue. Even on an average person that could cause awful burning. to make a long saga shorter I had a very frustrating back-and-forth with urgent care involving many rerouted phone trees, visit in person, unhelpful receptionists, and attempts to find over-the-counter alternatives. All were fruitless so I just  suffered all weekend until the urgent care Nurse Practitioner called me back on Monday and was suitably apologetic/outraged about the mint thing, and looked up every OTC product that might work as a substitute, since she couldn’t find any prescription level without mint. On Tuesday she called back again having found this:

It’s 4%, so just below prescription strength, while not oral grade, it’s actually fine for soft tissues as long as not fully ingested/internally applied. And most importantly, ABSOLUTELY NO ADDED FLAVORINGS. there is also a spray version that comes in a bottle, which under no circumstances should you try because it uses alcohol as a propellant and I had a very bad 5 minutes after testing that one. But the cream one is fine and brings blessed numbness in around 5 minutes with only minimal contact pain--they are still open wounds after all. 

I use this for the next 7 days. By this point the sores have gotten worse and larger, and then started to heal and shrink again. Mouth canker sores go through a similar ~2 week process, so this is about what I expected.

Finally the results of my bloodwork came back, and I was negative for all STIs. The NP was dumbfounded and apologized, and agreed to look up more information/treatment options for cases like this in the future. I’m not surprised her reaction was to assume herpes as it IS very common, but I’m sure other women experience NSGU’s and receive improper treatment. If you look them up, they’re even mentioned as being predominantly a problem for “young or prepubescent women” which, reading between the lines--it’s not that these become less likely if you’re older or sexually active. Doctors just make assumptions and don’t always look past the easy answers.

So if you or someone you know ends up with these--from the Covid vaccine or as a complication of upper respiratory infections in general (as they ARE an immune response and can just Happen to you)--here is what works as treatment. If you can see a doctor you trust, still do that. But if they don’t listen or if for some reason you can’t seek treatment, here is the course of action I recommend: 

Pick up that over-the-counter Pain Relief+Lidocaine NON MINTY numbing cream ASAP. Sores go from “annoying” to “excruciating” in only 3 days, so it’s best to get in person or with rush shipping. Sit in front of a mirror and gently apply with a q-tip, and wait 5 minutes for the medicine to take effect.

Pat gently dry with toilet paper, don’t make wiping motions. If you don’t feel clean enough, pat more with a wet washcloth and rinse it out, or hope in the shoer for 5 min just to rinse.

There may be pus or reside from the ointment that doesn’t go away with just rinsing. Every 2 days I made a half-strength bath of epsom salts, NUMBED FULLY, and then took a 10 minute bath to fully cleanse the area. the salt will sting terribly if you wait any longer, so I recommend standing and rinsing after this time.

The vulva is more exposed to air than the mouth. this may cause the sores to crack/bleed as they dry out. to avoid this, after using the restroom and cleaning yourself, you can apply a thick coating of Aquaphor on top of the sores. It will need to be rinsed off before you apply more numbing cream however, so if that is too many steps I recommend just using the Aquaphor overnight.

You may think its ok to get up in the middle of the night to pee without the numbing cream bc you have to go really bad and just once will be fine but it is NOT you will REGRET IT.

Unfortunately if you have sores on both sides you may develop what is known as “kissing sores”, aka sores directly opposite each other that touch when the area is not spread open. this means that after an extended period of time (overnight), the sores will try to heal into each other and opening the area back up painfully rips the tissue apart. INStEAD of ripping them apart, take a washclosh, run it under warm water, and do a hot/warm compress on the area. this will loosen the sores back up and separate them painlessly.

This is not exclusive to people with a vulva, they can also happen on scrotal/anal tissue. However it does seem to much more frequently affect people with typical XX sex organs. 

If you develop these, PLEASE fill out an averse reaction form or your country’s equivalent. Also, I’m so sorry and if you need emotional support or have questions please feel free to get in touch.

Most likely, these will not happen to you--the vast majority of vaccinated people have not had this as a side effect. But it IS popping up more and more, and it is good to know about it in advance so you can be prepared to deal with and treat it without as much anxiety and all the hoops I had to jump through to get good care. Overall I’m still glad to be vaccinated, but if I had known this was a side effect, as someone already prone to canker sores I would have waited to vaccinate until my car was fixed a week later a the very least :|

[emberfrostlovesloki]

#4 Reader X SickSpencer

Gif credit: @stunudo​

Prompt: Reader X SickSpencer - Spencer catches a cold and doesn’t come into work on Monday morning. The reader goes to his apartment to check and see if he is doing alright. 

Category: Fluff / Comfort

Content Warning: Language (maybe) 

A/N: After watching the episode where Spencer gets tortured I had an infinite need to write something where he gets comforted by someone. This is pretty domestic and fluffy, but it’s what I needed right now. I want to thank @veraiconcos​ for helping me with the inspiration for this chapter. I hope you all enjoy it. Please like / reblog!

Link to all stories

_y/n_ = your name

_y/l/n_ = you’re last name

_h/c_ = hair color

_b/s_ = brother/ sister

_h/l_ = hair length

_f/c_ favorite color

_Y/n_ walked into the headquarters of the BAU with a pep in her step. She had spent most of the weekend hiking the paths of Ricketts Glenn State Park in Pennsylvania. She had taken the train up after she had clocked out of work and spent the rest of the weekend disconnecting from the world. She found the forested paths relaxing compared to her normal job she was bound to. She had asked if Morgan or Prentiss wanted to join her, but both of her teammates already had plans for the weekend.  In total the woman had walked over fifty miles. At noon on Sunday _y/n_ sadly said goodbye to her campsite, and drove herself to the airport. She had arrive at the office before everyone on Monday morning. She hadn’t gotten any work done during her outdoor experience. Because of this she arrived at her desk early in order to make a dent in the pile of paperwork she had left behind on Friday. When she sat down at the white desk _y/n_ noticed that some of the files she was least looking forward to were nowhere to be found. She didn’t think too hard about it for the moment, and just grabbed another file instead. After an hour, the other members of the team started streaming into the bullpen. _Y/n_ noticed that at 8:00 A.M. Morgan, Prentiss, J.J., Hotch and Gideon were all present, except for Dr. Reid. Agent _y/l/n_ looked around the room once more just to make sure that the young man wasn’t actually there, and she was just missing him. Spencer had never been late to work before. He had actually picked her up multiple times when she had texted him in a panic that it was raining and the trains would run late, and she’d probably get fired for being two minutes late. She knew that her fears were unfounded, she also knew that Spencer knew her fear was stupid. None the less he would pull up to her apartment and swing the passenger side door open from the inside. Those had been good rides. When _y/n_ was very sure she had not missed Spencer she walked up to Morgan who was just now walking up to his desk. She leaned against his desk and asked, “Morning, do you know where Reid is? Also, I’m missing some files from my desk, any idea where they may be?” Derek smiled and said, “I can explain both questions sweetness.” _Y/n_ rolled her eye’s at Morgans flattery but still raised her eyebrows, non verbally telling him to continue. Morgan took a seat and continued, “Reid is sick, apparently he caught a cold. About your missing files, your boyfriend stayed late last Friday, last I saw of him he had taken about ten of your case files to his desk, and was filling them out himself.” Before _y/n_ had a chance to process that Derek had called Spencer her boyfriend she replied, “Oh my gosh, is he okay? When did he get sick?” Morgan smiled as she realized what term he had used for her friend. She grabbed one of his case files and started hitting him over the head with it. The athletic agent put his hands over his head and said, “Reid got sick on Saturday. He texted us on Sunday that he had a fever and Hotch told him to stay home.” 

Before _y/n_ could ask more questions, J.J. entered the room and said, “We have a case, let’s head into the conference room to talk over the details.” When the team was assembled, Hotcher stood up and started explaining the case. “We’re looking for an unsub that has killed congressman Luke Allen. The murder took place in the senators office last night at 1:00 A.M. His body was found today by his aid, Gracie Suveua. There was no apparent forced entry. The senators most popular contributions on Capitol Hill have been his working and signing the bill regarding Obergefell vs. Hodges in 2015.” The team nodded and agent _y/l/n_ commented, “So we may be looking for a person that has problems with the implications of gay marriage in the Supreme Court: religious extremists, opposing party members or a person from another radical religions that oppose LGBTQ+ rights.” Gideon agreed and replied, “That’s a great start for a profile. Hotch and Derek, would you head over to the sight of the murder. J.J. would you give Penelope our main facts so far and get her to do a database search based off of those criteria. Prentiss, _y/n_ and I will head over to the police precinct to ask some questions and gather information from the force.” After a minute of gathering in their separate groups, the teams went their separate ways to begin the hard work of the new case. Prentiss and _y/n_ weren’t thrilled to be going to the prescient. The officers were mostly of a male demographic, and often ignored comments that both female agents had made before, and turned out to be true later. Nonetheless, the trio whisked away to the station. When they arrived, the Police chief heartily shook Jason’s hand, but chose not to shake Emily of _y/n’s_. The two agents looked at each other, shrugged and moved into the sleek building after Gideon. It wasn’t until 9: 30 P.M. that the team was back to the conference room debriefing the information that they had accrued during the course of the day. After the debrief was over Aaron said, “I think we will be better use to this case if we all get some sleep and pick this up tomorrow. I don’t think that we aren’t at risk of another victim being killed tonight. If we work hard there won’t be a second death  to follow the first. Get some sleep and I’ll see you all tomorrow morning.” Each member of the team slowly got up, in their fatigue and moved out of the bright room and back toward their desks. When _y/n_ got to her desk she slumped down in her swivel chair. She pulled out her phone and looked at the message she had missed. She ignored a text from her mom and instantly scrolled down to the text that Spencer had sent her. The message read, “I’m still feeling pretty bad. I’m sorry that I can’t be useful in this case.” _y/n_ observed the text, and thought about how Spencer threw himself into his work 110% of the time and maybe it was batter that he had a break from work, even if he had to feel like shit to get to that place. 

Before she could respond to the message that Reid had sent three hours ago Morgan approached _y/l/n_ and asked, “Do you need a ride home? Taking the train right now isn’t exactly safe.”_Y/n_ looked up to him and said, “I think I’ll go check on Reid first. Would you mind taking me to his apartment?” Morgan raised his eyebrows at the statement, and after a moment of silence said, “Sure thing.” The agents moved to the parking lot where Derek’s car sat ready to take off. _Y/n_ had sold her car when she had moved to D.C. to pay the deposit on her crappy apartment. She had always told herself that she would buy a new car when she had the money. Even though she  had been working on the BAU unit for over a year she had never bought a car. She preferred the train anyway. When the agent got onto the car Morgan smoothly moved out of his spot and into the empty road. _Y/n_ pulled out her phone and texted Spencer back saying, “Sorry you’re still feeling bad. I am going to come over and see if you’re doing okay. Be there in about twenty minutes.” When she finished sending the text she put her phone in her pocket and looked out the front window at the empty road. After a minute Derek commented, “You really like him, don’t you?” The male agent had his big brother voice on when he asked the question. _Y/n_ pulled her hand through her _h/c_ before responding, “Derek you know how I feel about him. You don’t have to interrogate me. But it might be helpful if you didn’t call Spencer my boyfriend in front of him. You know how he gets when it comes to affection.” Morgan smiled. He knew that both agents had spent a good amount of time together outside of work. He thought that they made a good couple, but also that they hadn’t said anything about their feelings to each other yet. Morgan respected that they were moving slowly, that really was more their style anyway. Derek replied, “I get you. Plus, I wouldn’t want to jeopardize any chance you might have in letting him tell you that he likes you.” As he finished his statement the duo pulled into the front of Reid apartment building. She looked over to her friend and said, “You know nothing may happen. If it’s just platonic I’d get it. But I do love him.” Derek smiled at the fact that she had actually said the words out loud. He responded, “Go get him tiger.” She rolled her eyes and stepped out of the car. _Y/n_ leaned back in to say, “If I get anything it will probably be a cold from our resident genius,” before closing the door, waving and walking into the apartment. 

When she was in the apartment she took a moment to enjoy the sleek interior of the building. She was always jealous of the coffee shop that the contained. She had to walk three blocks to get to a coffee shop from her apartment. Secretly she was grateful for this fact, because if her apartment had a cafe she knew she would spend all her money there. She was brought back to the moment when the elevator dinged and opened. The agent waited for the occupants of the elevator to get out, and she stepped in once it was empty. She pressed the cool round metal button that read ‘5.’ The moving contraption stopped twice for other residents to get in the metal box before _y/n_ got out on floor five. When she was outside Spencer’s door she realized that she had never checked her messages before just showing up at his room. She pulled out her cellular device, and saw that he had not responded. _Y/l/n_ thought, ‘Maybe he’s asleep? Or maybe he’s feeling really bad and didn’t want me to come?’ The agent panicked for a moment, considering that Spencer might be too ill to respond. After a moment she calmed down and knocked on the door. It took a minute before she heard light shuffling outside the door. She could barely hear her friend say, “Who is it?” _Y/n_ rolled hey eyes at the question; all he had to do was look out his peep hole. After quietly laughing she said, “It’s _y/n_. Can I come in?” The door opened slightly and _y/n_ could see a small sliver of Dr. Reid. She tried to ascertain his sickness level from the shade of his face. Spencer stood for a minute calculating how risky it would be for him to let her in. He said in a raspy voice, “I might get you sick. You know that 3% of American’s have a 64% chance of getting a  cold during the year.” _Y/n_ smiled and replied, “I’m happy you’re still coherent enough to give me statistics Spence, and if I’m going to get a cold I’d rather it be from you, and not some random person on the street. I’m just here to make sure you don’t stay sick for longer than necessary.” Reid reconsidered the odds. How old _y/n_ was, how active she was and her general health. After he finished his assessment the young man opened the door and allowed his friend in. 

When she was in the apartment the female agent set her backpack by the front of the door. Spencer had stepped back in an attempt to lower the rate of transmission. While he was doing this _y/n_ looked him over. He was paler than usual, and his cheeks were flushed red. His hair was limply hanging around his cheeks that were more sunken in than usual. Even in his comfortable looking Yale sweatshirt and grey shorts, the man looked miserable. _Y/n_ looked at him sympathetically and said, “Maybe you should take a seat?” Reid replied, “Do I really look that bad?” She shrugged her shoulders and sighed, but didn’t tell him verbally that he looked like a kid who had fallen into a swimming pool in his clothes by accident. She walked over to the coach and Spencer followed her. He sunk down into the dark fabric of the couch leaning his head against the back. She pulled a chair up while he was seated and asked, “Can I feel your forehead?” When the words were out of her mouth _y/n_ realized how strange it sounded, but Spencer didn’t seem to think it was weird - maybe because he was slightly delirious - or he just knew to expect strange expressions that he didn’t understand come out form her lips. So he replied, “Okay.” _Y/n_ stood up from her chair and knelt on the couch next to Spencer and lifted her hand. She placed it on his forehead. His skin was hot. For the moment that _y/n’s_ hand was on his head Spencer enjoyed it. The cool sensation of her hand was relaxing. He wished it stayed there for a moment longer. The genius realized that the concept was completely illogical because the heat of his fevered body would simply begin transferring to her hand. It only took a second for _y/n_ to realize that Spencer was still running a high temperature, and even though she didn’t need to, she slipped her hand under his chin to check the temperature there too. She assumed she did this because her mom had done it when she was a kid. She pulled her hand away again for the second time and got up. Spencer leaned his head back to look at _y/n_ as his friend moved toward his bathroom. He heard the tap turn on, and after a few seconds, she returned to his side with a small hand towel. She was holding her hand under it so that it didn’t drip water on his wooden floors. “When did you last check your temperature, and how high was it?” _Y/n_ inquired as she placed the damp towel on his hot forehead. Spencer breathed a sigh of relief at the coolness of the cloth. He then responded, “I checked it two hours ago. I think it was around 100.72 degrees. She nodded at the reply and then asked, “Have you eaten yet today?” The young genius was notorious for completely forgetting that he needed to nourish his slender body on a regular basis. So she could only imagine that while he was sick, food was the last thing on his mind. He gave the response she expected of, “No. I’ve felt kind of nauseous all day, I didn’t think eating was going to help with that.” _Y/n_ rolled her eyes and said, “Have you ever considered that not eating could make you nauseous too?” The young woman got up and went into the kitchen. She opened the fridge and only found a carton of eggs and a few containers of leftovers. She turned to Spencer and asked, “Why don’t you have any food Reid?” Spencer gave a cough before defended himself by saying, “I normally go grocery shopping on Sunday, but I was sick, so I didn’t go.” _Y/l/n_ understood and said, “Okay. Well I’m going to run down to the corner store and make you some dinner. Do you have a favorite comfort food?” Spencer stood and took a few steps toward her and said, “You really don’t have to. I can take care of myself.” _Y/n_ replied, “I know you can Spence. I just want to be here to show you you don’t have to all the time. Especially when you’re sick.’ Reid bit his lip as he usually did when he was thinking. After a moment he strode to his counter and grabbed the keys to his apartment, and car, and tossed them at _y/n_. She quickly shifted left and grabbed the object being flung at her. Spencer said, “I really like grilled cheese sandwiches.” She smiled and said, “I’ll be back in ten minutes.” Before walking out of his living room and into the hall. She locked the door behind her and moved toward the elevator. 

The corner store was limited in it’s selections. But all that really mattered was that _y/n_ had a loaf of white bread, some American cheese, a kind of pathetic looking can of tomato soup, and some orange juice. With these items in her basket the girl moved to the counter and paid for the groceries with cash from her wallet. It wasn’t until she was at the counter paying that she noticed the time. The Digital clock that was displayed behind the cashier glowed in red letters 10:25 P.M. She knew that if she went back to Spencer and made dinner she was going to miss the last train. To the woman it was just a small thought that quickly came and went. She wasn’t going to leave her friend right now. If he was uncomfortable with her staying at his place overnight _y/n_ would get a taxi back to her apartment. Spencer heard the key slide in the door and knew that _y/n_ had returned. He was currently lying down on the couch and didn’t really move that much as she set down a bag on his counter. There was a moment where some glass clinked together, and a second later she was in front of him with a glass of ice water and a glass of orange juice for him. She set them down on the table next to the couch and he said, “Thanks. I’m feeling a little better now.” _Y/n_ smiled and said, “Good, if you want a distraction while I’m making the food you can look over the new case. We’ve been working on it all day and haven’t gotten very far. The files in my bag.” Spencer jolted at the chance of doing something other than feeling miserable, and he got up and found the file in _y/n’s_ backpack. As he walked back toward the couch he noticed that _y/n_ had bought herself a coffee from the shop in the lobby. She shared his taste for sugar filled beverages. Unlike him, she preferred milk in her caffeinated drinks. Spencer grabbed the warm polystyrene cup and took a sip of it while she was digging in his fridge for some butter. Spencer often stole _y/n’s_ snacks or drinks. It was the type of thing that would make her  angry for a second and then she would laugh it off for five more. He would always buy her a replacement item, often he would make it a bigger cup of coffee or bar of chocolate than the one she had before. Spencer knew that the young agent was trying to save up money so she could fly down to her _b/s’s_ college graduation in a month. It was the least he could do. After all living in D.C. could be hard on the bank account. 

It wasn’t until the soup was on the stove heating up, and the grilled cheese sandwiches were in the pan getting melty that _y/n_ started looking around for her coffee cup. After a minute of futile searching she spotted it in Spencer’s hand. She smirked, moving to the back of the couch, she pretended to look over Reid’s shoulder at the information he was examining. When the man removed the cup from his lips and lowered it toward his leg she grabbed it out of his grasp and said, “Really Reid. This is how you repay me for my help.” Halfway through the sentence and she was already laughing at his antics. She glided to a position in front of him and started bringing the drink to her own mouth when she remembered Spencer was sick. She examined the lid of the cup, and obviously some of his saliva was on the rim of the cup. Reid looked up at her and said, “Sorry I also haven’t had any coffee yet today either.” _Y/n_ sighed and handed him back the cup replying, “You know, I fear that if you asked me to murder someone I would consider it.” Spence smiled up at her.  After another five minutes or so the pair were eating a very late dinner at the kitchen table. They were talking about the details of the case. As soon as they had finished eating Spencer asked, “Are you planning on going back to your apartment tonight? The train stopped running a half hour ago.” A blush rose to _y/n’s_ cheeks and replied, “Well. I was wondering if I could just stay here tonight? I need to look through the details of the case again, and do some research. I’ll be quiet.” It wasn’t a super odd request. The pair had stayed up all night before working on cases or having movie marathons, but they had never been at one of their apartments when one, or both of them was going to be sleeping. Spencer looked over to her and said, “Of course you can. I can help you with the research if you want.” _Y/n_ smiled and said, “Thanks for letting me stay. And offering the help, but I think you should get some rest. You aren’t going to get better without sleep.” She smiled at him and began picking up the dishes from their dinner. Spencer helped her put them in the sink and said, “I promise next time it’s my turn to cook. I’ll finish the dishes if you want to take a shower before I turn in.” _Y/n_ considered that she had been in the same clothes for over ten hours and knew that a shower would relax her she said, “that would be great.” She was embarrassed to ask it, but managed to stutter out, “Do you think I could borrow one of your shirts to wear while  I work. These aren’t the most comfortable clothes.�� Spencer opened his mouth for a moment at the idea and tried to clear his head of the image of her in one of his shirts. The man snapped his mouth shut and his jawline tightened before he responded, “Um, yeah. In my closet on the left hand side are all my t-shirts and sweaters. You can wear any of them.” She said, “Okay. I’ll just be a bit.” She rubbed her hand over his shoulder as she walked in the direction of his bedroom. After a minute Spencer could hear the water running. 

The lean agent scrubbed down the dishes and put them in the drainer next to the sink. When he finished with the plates and bowls, he sat back down on the couch with the intention of looking at the case again. His thoughts didn’t allow him to. Instead he was considering how he was feeling. He wondered if it was alright to want these kinds of evenings to happen more often. He knew that he wasn’t that good with women. His few attempts to woe the friends and strangers he had been interesting in had usually gone horribly wrong. Yet, unbelievably a friend had come to check up on him, and was comfortable enough to spend the night at his place. He couldn’t figure out if he had done anything differently with _y/n_ than his other friends. He also was unsure if she felt the same way he did. Maybe she was uncomfortable being here and just needed to stay out of convenience. While Reid was considering the current situation _y/n_ was doing the same. She was running shampoo through her _h/l_ hair and musing over what had happened over the last two hours. She had always wanted, hoped, to get closer to Spencer, but she was afraid that if she moved too fast that he wouldn’t be interested, or worse not want to hang around her at all. She and Spencer did share some of the same hobbies but she hoped that she knew him better than that. She knew how he shied away from physical affection, and how he always seemed so happy when she or Jason told him he had done a good job, and how she knew what his shampoo was going to smell like before she even opened the bottle. She really hoped that her presence, both literally and metaphorically wasn’t making him uncomfortable now. When she was finished with her reverie _y/n_ rinsed out her hair and stepped out of the shower, After another ten minutes Spencer looked up to see _y/n_ in another one of his YALE sweatshirt. It was so long on her shorter body that it covered her like an ill fitting dress. However, Spencer thought she could wear a potato sack and pull it off. He quickly looked away from her to hide his blush. 

The duo looked over the cases and _y/n_ hooked up to his WiFi on her computer. After this was finished and _y/n_ had bought herself another coffee (using Reid’s card), she recommended he go to bed. It was already 12:00 A.M. at this point. Spencer relented and headed to his bedroom. Before he went in he said, “Goodnight. If you’ve got any questions you can ask. Just knock on the door.” She smiled and said goodnight back, and told him to sleep well. The agent continued her work for another three hours before she moved to the couch to try and get more comfortable to do her work. The next morning Spencer found _y/n_ laying down on the couch she was clutching a pillow to her chest and had her left leg draped over the blanket she had covered her body with. Spencer dared not walk past her torso in case she was indecent below the leg she had over the blanket. He was feeling much better today, and wished that he could go into work with her, however, it was company policy to wait a full twenty-four hours after a fever to return to work. Spencer knew it was for the safety of his coworkers, but he hated being away from his job. The man knelt down and tapped _y/n_ on the shoulder. She sighed slightly before opening her eyes to see him. She rubbed her eyes and sat up. Spencer quickly averted her eyes as she rose. She looked down at herself and realized that her _f/c_ boy shorts were peeking out from beneath Spencer’s YALE sweater. Her face turned red and she coughed, stood up and pulled the sweater down. She looked at her phone and quietly cursed, “Fuck, I’m going to be late.” Spencer knew that if _y/n_ was fast, and hurried she could catch the train and make it in time. He said, “Go change. If you’re fast you can make the 7:30 A.M. train.” _Y/n_ nodded and grabbed her clothes and ran into his bedroom. She shut the door and didn’t even bother to lock it as she stripped and quickly changed. Reid, who had woken up about thirty minutes before her, and had grabbed some coffee for her and himself. He had meant to wake her up once he had woken up, but he couldn’t disturb her when he had seen her so peaceful. When the woman came out of his room in her usual black pants and satin shirt, she looked ready to fight the crime in the city as she usually did. She put on her shoes and grabbed her things, stuffing them into her backpack. Spencer cleared his throat after she was finished and handed her the coffee. She smiled at him and said, “Thank you so much Spencer, for letting me stay, and the coffee.” Spencer smiled and hesitantly asked, “Would you come back again tonight? In case I need help again. Or feel bad?” It took a moment for the words to register and _y/n_ said “Huh?” And maybe it was because it was from lack of sleep, or her just being awake for five minutes, but the meaning of the words struck her after she had responded. She realized that Spencer wanted, that he really wanted to spend another night like they had had yesterday. She smiled up at him and replied, “Of course I’ll come back tonight Spence. I’d love that.” The word love was not lost on the genius, and he took a minute trying to and express his feeling, saying, “You know I really like you. I mean I appreciate you, or I feel things about you…” _Y/n_ wanted really really badly to hear the words come from him, but she knew that she didn’t have a moment to lose or she would be late. She hated cutting him off, but reluctantly said, “I know Spencer, me too.” 

At hearing this Spencer gave a heartwarming smile and leaned down to hug her. She quickly gave him a kiss on the forehead and cheek. She then let go of him, and ran out the door, shouting over her shoulder, “I’ll see you tonight!”