#i also knew it would be used as a launchpad for other movies; so time was taken off from central characters

[lokiinmediasideblog]

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[smilesthroughfandoms]

Every single episode of Ducktales (2017) Summarized in Roughly in One Sentence or Less!

Thank you Frank and team so much for introducing this family to a new generation of kids while remaining faithful to your source material. I hope you all enjoy my attempts at humor!

Woo-oo!: We don’t really know what’s going on yet but let’s do this!

Escape To/From Atlantis!: “Well I’m wearing a kilt McDuck! A kiiiilt!”

Daytrip of Doom!: They’re all siblings now and I love them all.

The Great Dime Chase!: “Shut up, everyone! I’ve done something brilliant!” (Also: Guess’s who my favorite character is?)

The Beagle Birthday Breakout!: Lena and Webby are best girls, fight me on this

Terror of the Terra-firmians!: This is the Spoopiest episode and also the most heartwarming.

The House of the Lucky Gander!: He’s an asshole but I love him.

The Infernal Internship of Mark Beaks!: He’s an even bigger asshole but I love him.

The Living Mummies of Toth-Ra!: I too would do anything for a good burrito.

The Impossible Summit of Mt. Neverrest!: “If I had a nickel for every person who cursed me with their dying breath, I’d be twice as rich as I already am.”

The Spear of Selene!: Of course Scrooge showed up freaking Zeus.

Beware the B.U.D.D.Y System!: The fusion of Iron Man and Sailor Moon I never knew I always wanted.

The Missing Links of Moorshire!: I always knew My Little Pony had a deadly fandom but this is ridiculous…

Mystery at McDuck Manor!: Took you long enough, Duckworth, welcome back.

Jaw$!: In this house, we love and respect Tiffany. (Also: Whoever came up with this episode title is the coolest person ever)

The Golden Lagoon of White Agony Plains!: Scrooge and Glomgold are in love with Allison Janney, and honestly, same.

Day of the Only Child!: Doofus is even creepier than Lil’ Gideon, and that is saying something.

From the Confidential Casefiles of Agent 22!: *hums James Bond theme intensely to myself*

Who is Gizmoduck?!: He’s not throwing away his shot! (I’m sorry, I had to)

The Other Bin of Scrooge McDuck!: I love Louie in this episode, he’s such a mood.

Sky Pirates… in the Sky!: The Pirates of the Caribbean meets High School Music crossover starring evil Panchito I never knew I needed.

The Secret(s) of Castle McDuck!: We’re all Webby in this episode.

The Last Crash of the Sunchaser!: *ugly sobbing*

The Shadow War, Part 1: Night of De Spell!: Donald finally gets the love he deserves.

The Shadow War Part 2: Day of the Ducks!: *spoiler warning* How is she still alive?!?!?!

The Most Dangerous Game… Night!: David screaming “GAME NIGHT!” is the best damn thing I’ve ever seen.

The Depths of Cousin Fethry!: I love Cousin Spongebob!

The Ballad of Duke Baloney!: Dammit, Frank.

The Town Where Everyone Was Nice!: They’re boyfriends mates, sorry I don’t make the rules.

Storkules in Duckburg!: Storkules is the ultimate Donald Duck fan, we cannot comepete.

Last Christmas!: Somehow the Ghost of Christmas McBrayer is the least surprising thing I’ve ever seen in this show.

Whatever Happened to Della Duck?!: Oh, so that’s how she survived.

Treasure of the Found Lamp!: Dijin is the best character.

The Outlaw Scrooge McDuck!: Yee–and I cannot stress this enough–haw.

The 87 Cent Solution!: *wheezing* Dammit, Frank…

The Golden Spear!: Oh my god, they were roommates!

Nothing Can Stop Della Duck!: Dammit, Frank!

Raiders of the Doomsday Vault!: “So stand out, above the crowd! Even if I gotta shout it out loud!”

Friendship Hates Magic!: Webby gets two friends for the price of one seance!

The Dangerous Chemistry of Gandra Dee!: BEAKS SMASH… THAT LIKE BUTTON! (I’m so sorry)

The Duck Knight Returns!: *spoilers* The single best superhero, origin story-based episode ever! 

Whatever Happened To Donald Duck?!: *sobbing* He’s a good dad!

Happy Birthday, Doofus Drake!: This entire episode is creepier than most indie horror games.

A Nightmare on Killmotor Hill!: All the kids’ dreams are moods… except Huey’s, his dream can go jump off a microwave.

The Golden Army of Cornelius Coot!: Della is just pulling a Donald and adopting any and all kids within arms reach at this point.

Timephoon!: “I’m on it!” *gets struck by lightning* “I’ve immediately failed you!”

Glomtales!: I don’t know what’s more surprising, the fact that Louie won the bet or that they used Glomgold’s theme song takeover as the intro.

The Richest Duck in the World!: Drag them, Owlson. Drag them all…

Moonvasion! Part 1: *deep inhale* D A M M I T F R A N K!

Moonvasion! Part 2: Glomgold is my new favorite villain character.

Challenge of the Senior Junior Woodchuck!: Huey and Violet fight for the right to be crowned the squarest of squares.

Quack Pack!: Radical dude! *insert cheesy 90s riff here*

Double-O Duck in You Only Crash Twice!: We were all simping SO HARD this episode don’t think I forgot!!!

The Lost Harp of Mervana!: Scrooge fails a vibe check.

Louie’s Eleven!:  Is it really a heist movie if something doesn’t go completely wrong?

Astro B.O.Y.D.!: So much ANIME!!!!!!

The Rumble for Ragnarok!: Eh, the MCU did it better

The Phantom and the Sorceress!: Seeing Gladstone suffer brings me an odd amount of joy

They Put a Moonlander on Earth!: They’re lesbians, Harold!

The Trickening!: Did… did no one really tell Launchpad how Halloween works?

The Forbidden Fountain of the Foreverglades!: If I had a nickel for every time a cartoon version of Ponce de Leon died a gruesome death on screen, I’d have two nickels, which isn’t a lot but it’s weird that it happened twice, right?

Let’s Get Dangerous!: *spoilers* THEY ARE A SUPERHERO FAMILY!!!!

Escape from the ImpossiBin!: Scrooge and Beakley are a little too excited to traumatize their family because of their trauma.

The Split Sword of Swanstantine!: Dewey and Webby literally walk in blind, Violet spices things up, and Huey unleashes the Rage™

New Gods on the Block!: The most accurate representation of Zeus ever.

The First Adventure!: Young Donald is one heck of a mood.

The Fight for Castle McDuck!: The sibling culture episode.

How Santa Stole Christmas!: Charles Dickens would approve, probably.

Beaks in the Shell!: Huey ships Fendra and Gyro needs to stop hiding in the closet.

The Lost Cargo of Kit Cloudkicker!: The Battle of Theatre Kids... in the Sky!

The Life and Crimes of Scrooge McDuck!: All the emotional weight was nearly overshadowed by One (1) attractive goth twink.

The Last Adventure Part 1; A Tale of Three Webbys!: They’re so cute! I love them!

The Last Adventure Part 2; The Lost Library of Isabella Finch!: Letting the kids on the plane is the single smartest decision Scrooge has ever made in his life.

The Last Adventure Part 3; Tale’s End!: *ugly, happy, heartbreaking sobbing* Woo-oo!

[popculturebuffet]

Ducktales Comics: Spies Like Us and Dime after Dime or Weblena: The Preschool Days (Lena Retrospective) (Comissioned by WeirdKev27)

Hello all you happy people and welcome back to Shadow Into Light, My Lena Retrospective, which fittingly has now come to Women’s History Month! I sadly do not have anything besides this arc prepared for the month. This month is pretty packed for me with two shows a week to cover, as while there’s only two weeks of Ducktales left final space starts up right after to take it’s spot, two arcs to cover, and two time specific movie reviews: animal crossing the movie and the 1990 TMNT film. I will try to get more than the currently planned top 12 superheroines list out there... but this month is very tight as is, so if I do not I deeply apologize.

Now that’s out of the way, it’s appropriate we start Women’s history month on some likely lesser known parts of Lena’s history, with some comics stories focusing on our faviorite emo lesbian duck and her 87 counterpart. Before I get started on that though Kev my patreon pointed out something intresting a few weeks back i’ve been forgetting to get to and since we’re looking into Minima, I felt this was the perfect time to do so: Lena’s Concept art. 

There’s quite a few things to gleam from this. For starters as pointed out in the reddit thread I got the image as a whole from this was made in 2015, meaning Lena was one of the first new characters designed for the series and was part of it from the VERY early stages, as evidenced by the fact that despite clearly having their new personalities established, Beakly and Webby still had the old designs. 

The other notable change is that her first design was way more like both Magica nad Minima, a bit more modern, but clearly far more obvious who she was related to. She also had all black feathers making the shadow twist a bit more obvious and was likely done away with both to avoid giving that twist away, the same reason for the fake lestrange name, and to avoid accidently black coding her, as while Lena being black would’ve been intersting, it also would’ve invited a firestorm of controversy given that their one black character in season 1.. woul’dve started off as a homeless, manipulative antagonist, and none of that would play well nor was it something the progressive crew of this show couldn’t spot from a mile away.  And even this early on they have an almost final design ready, simply changing the shirt to fit her personality more, and her hair to be pink because it honestly looked better She also had green eyes throughout, but for whatever reason they phased them out. That part I don’t quite get as they look nice but probably they were hard to translate to the reboot style once they settled on their own. Her purple eyeshadow and haircut though have stuck since and were good calls. 

One last VERY obvious note.. Webby was gay for Lena from minute one. While Dana helped it is now VERY obvious they gay coded this relationship from the design phase, and the crew was entirely aware the whole time and I gave them less credit than I should have. They clearly had this in mind, and it’s very likely ONLY subtext because Disney, while making more and more progress, is very reluctant to have queer characters as Owl House was a struggle and since they have a tighter leash on properites based on the sensational 6, that means Frank knew they had the same odds of making Webby or Della queer in anything but subtext that a pig has of suviving in a slaughterhouse. I bring this up because I fear the series getting accused of queerbaiting somewhere down the road instead of doing what they could with a bad hand and hoping they could make the show as gay as they could. Penny is as out as they posisbly could get her, and Violet and Lena’s dad’s got a full apperance, if no speaking role that made it obvious beyond a shadow of a doubt their gay and did it in a plot important episode. So they did their best and I want them to get credit for that. 

But while this is all intresting stuff, join me under the cut for the meat of today’s review as I dig into Lena’s only apperance in the tie-in comic that was never punished here, and the only apperance of her protoype Minima.

Spies Like Us:  As I mentioned this comic was never published here which is doubly weird to me because of how I knew this story existed. Since I follow comics weekly and buy trades reguarly, I read the solicits companies put out eveyr month to see what new series are coming, what the ones i’m currently reading are doing, and what trades are coming out. That sort of thing, and it’s something I love. I know their basically adds.. but their well put together adds that really pull you into the books you like. The big two and the indies are all very good at it and sometimes i’ts the only way to know a comic is coming if the company dosen’t make a press release for it ahead of time. 

So naturally given there are several comics I follow at idw, paticuarlly the TMNT comics, I read those solicits and found they were going to do an issue with Webby and Lena becoming spies, and was excited about it. I ended up forgetting about it and never really followed the Ducktales comic as it came out, and upon reading an issue or two recently, one for another comission by kev as one story, happy happy valley, was particularly terrible. For those who haven’t read the story or my review, it involved the family getting stranded on an island where their forced to partake in activites and smile..that somehow turned into an aseop about Louie wanting to be rich. It ended with this

Yes.. really. That actually happened. But even with this, I fully planned to cover the issue when I covered Lena, and brought it up to Kev when he commissioned the retrospective. He gave me the discord equilvent of a blank stare and had never heard of it. I soon found out why: the story was replaced as, and fair play to disney, it spoiled Beakly’s past from the agent 23 episode which wasn’t going to air in time.  What dosen’t work is they never reprinted the story in The US.. didn’t put it in a future issue and just swap it’s place didn’t put it in the nothing. And the story was fully complete as we’ll see, with a cover and everything so they had no excuse whatsoever to NEVER use it, even with what happened to Lena in the season finale, this clearly took place before that and it was weird to just shelve it because of that. But thankfully when a bunch of the stories were reprinted overseas, this and another one, also webby centric got published overseas. But not in english.

Lucky for me, I was able to find an english translation of an english story which you can read RIGHT HERE. It was translated by @neopuff and I thank them for it as without them this review would not be possible and want to give them all the credit. So was it worth all their hard work translating it? Well let’s take a look. 

We begin at the Manor where Lena is skulking around suspiciously.. though it turns out she and Webby are just playing hide and seek. Though Lena accuses cheating. The dialouge here is pretty flat though that’s not Neopuff’s fault at all. As I can attest from reading other stories a lot of the early IDW comics are just this flat in dialoguge no matter the writer as they were likely given character descriptions and basic info about the show they likely had written up for merchandising and Frank and Co were given no involvement and likely weren’t made avaliable to consult on the comics to help them be a bit more fleshed out. It’s very obvious to me Disney just tried to get these pumped out so they’d have a series in stores to tie in without carring about qualities and given Scrooge debuted in comics, their lack of care toward that side of things in general, but especially in the first american published original duck comics in a while, bothers me a lot. It’s inexcusable. 

That being said the story isn’t half bad nor is the setup as the two hear a beeping and find it’s Beakly’s phone going off with a mysterious message from Q, Webby thinks she’s been reactivated, and is encouraged by Lena to go look after her while she stays along. While Webby says in response

It just feels grossly out of character for both. Lena is far more subtle about manipulation as shown five minutes ago and Webby blindly trusts her. Because she has a massive crush on her and is naïve about how the world works. It just seems very odd of her to get suspicious as she never does on screen, and again it comes off as Disney having barely given the writers any materials on them when i’m sure Frank or Matt would’ve been happy to write up a thing for them to help outside of the usual press materials they were given. 

Though hte last line isn’t all that out of character and has an obvious answer as within a jumpcut Launchpad’s taking them to London and is told to blend in.. which he does with an australian flag and accent.. good gag. 

So our heroines do some heroic breaking and entering and look for the package, but soon find while hiding it’s already in transit.. and had obvious bows on int. Whoops. Our heroes trie the old follow tha tcar bit and refreshingly, it dosen’t pan out as the guy stops and tells them to get out. A nice twist. Unable to follow, our heroes instead find launchpad lost, as his map is upside down

So Lena dares him if he can follow that plane, a nice bit of character for both. I will give Joe credit. While the dialouge’s a bit flat and there was that out of character moment.. for the most part he does nail the actual character down and does use it decently enough. He’s just not given enough page room or actual details to work  with is all. 

So while our heroes follow they end up having to crash as they run out of fuel.. lucky their with the expert but end up near home where the package is delivered to. Turns out this wasn’t a spy thing, this was just a thing with her aunt. That’s fine and a nice gag.. it’s just ruined by just sorta.. ending. Lena leaves disapointed and Beakly scolds webby for “playing spy” and she’s sad. That’s it that’s how it ends. Which dosen’t fit the characters, as while Beakly would defintely scold her, it just dosen’t FIT that she’d be that tearse or not appricate the effort or give her an actual lecture and it feels like Joe had no idea how to end this after the gag and just.. ended it. 

Final Thoughts for Spies Likes Us: This was okay.  It is a bit of a disappointment as for the only story not available.. i’ts just okay and not really above an average Ducktales comics story, with some nice character bits but feeling a bit weak overall, as do at least the first half of the idw comics. I haven’t read the later stuff to see if it got better. It’s worth a read if you like Webby and Lena as characters and it’s not BAD, it’s just not anything impressive and is a simple hyjinks filled misunderstanding story. 

Dime After Dime:

So now  we go back a bit to the original. I didn’t do these in chronological order because frankly, Dime after Dime is the better story of the two and the bigger one at that, so I have more to work with here. But the original also had comics and honestly from the few i’ve read much BETTER comics. I chalk this up to two things: The Ducktales 87 comics seem to have come out AFTER the series was already a hit, and since Ducktales is pretty close to the original uncle scrooge comics minus it’s own tweaks here and there, it’s easy enough to just write the stories like you would a regular uncle scrooge story, just with Webby and Launchpad added, whereas the idw writers were staffed with writing for all new versions of the characters with noticable differences without much to go on.  It’s why to me with tie in comics you have two options: Wait long enough so you can put your story inbtween the episodes like the Steven Universe and Regular Show comics did or just make your own continuity entirely like the Adventure Time Comics and the Archie TMNT Adventures series did. The ONLY time i’ve seen a comic work like this is the Bravest Warriors comic, which had a talented writer and fit well enough in the margins until it sadly ended.. and honestly is BETTER in some cases than the series. I might get to it someday. The point is this comic shows why you need to have a deft hand adapting something instead of just falling your arms about and hoping it’ll work. 

So today’s comic was part of some Disney Series called cartoon tales, which clearly repackaged comic stories from wherever, and put them together. I don’t know much about it and the only other issue avaliable collects the disney adventures adaptation of “Just Us Justice Ducks”, which I might cover at some point. This book does have two other stories which i’d be happy to do on comission or on my own at some point, one involving gladstone the other gizmoduck, but for now, i’m just sticking to the title story and the reason you all came here. 

So we open with Magica gazing into her crystal ball from her Mt. Vesuvies base saying that Scrooge will never know what hit him I know exactly what and who wiil hit him thank you very much. 

Scrooge is seeing Webby off to her first day of day camp, getting all teary eyed which is touching. Beakly apparently goes with her as the story never SAYS Sshe does but she’s not also not around when the story moves on, as Launchpad says it looks like rain. Scrooge dismisses him, though Launchpad turns out to be right. Scrooge had good reason for once though, instead of just being a dick good on you comic for making me not want to punch him in the face, trust me that is a high bar to clear with the scrooge comics, as the weather was fine just a minute ago. Naturally it was Magica All Along! Nothing scrooge can do now that eveyrthing has gone wrong! Her entrance though is sadly not a catchy earwormy tune, but .. this confusing line

I think your thinking of Gladstone. And he’s still single so.. have at that but no Scrooge is the one who values hard work over anything else and brags about THAT or being rich. I .. I don’t get this line and frankly I don’t want to. Even in stories where the dime is supernaturally lucky and the source of his wealth he dosen’t boast about it because he’s not stupid and dosen’t want everyone knowing how to bankrupt him instantly. This line will baffle me until I die, presumably, given my life’s tragetctory, after reviewing an episode of mighty ducks and slipping on some a jerky wrapper. 

Scrooge asks what she wants... 

No this isn’t that kind of story sadly. Her plan is to.. zap the bin with lightning and take the dime. Really just went with your first draft didn’t you magica? But as stupid as this plan is Scrooge has prepared for it. He installed a lightning rod on the bin to save on power, and to power his new super soaker traps. So all Magica did was save him money. She flies off and nothing is acomplished. 

So we get back to Webby at the Teenie Weenie Day Camp.. and just so you don’t think that was a terrible joke on my part...

My theory for how this name got approved at all is the editor KNEW how that sounded and just wanted to see if Disney would actually print a comic with the phrase Teenie Weenie without getting what it means in slang or how hilariously inapproriate it is to namme a children’s camp after it. 

Your probably wondering who that grown woman calling Webby a dweeb is. Well story wise, she’s SUPPOSED to be another kid at the camp around Webby’s age. In practice, she looks like THIS in closeup

So it looks and plays like a 30 year old woman snuck into the day camp and no one’s noticed she’s not actually a children. Or their just humoring her because she had a week to live. I don’t know. I do know she doesn’t get to judge on names. 

Snippy Von Glitz, proof rich people really do hate their kids and this this comic is trying personally to give me material. Snippy is your average alpha bitch, taking a chair from Minma and being obnoxious and classist and all that jazz. Minima gets hers back by making the chair bouncy then returning it to normal so Snippy gets in trouble when she makes up things about the chair, with the lady in charge getting ready to call her Dad. You cannot convince me that her “Dad” is just what she calls her husband, this is how they both get off, and that the lady at the preschool only tolerates it because they pay her a lot and so far the kids haven’t noticed Snippy is 30. Webby likes minima finding her name pretty, proving that the ho yay is alive no matter the webby and magica relative, and Minma returns the favor by saving her from a block. 

Minma is reluctant to make an actual friend, finding they aren’t worth anything and given most of the kids here apparently pick on her and her aunt is well.. Magica, it’s understandable why she’d be so cold. But Webby presses on and says something from Scrooge about friends. Which given Ducktales scrooge has none goes weird but it gets Minma to find out she knows and lives with Scrooge, so she cons webby into taking the dime for show and tell, showing that she can manipulate them with her powers, and that he won’t notice it’s missing, getting her with “I thought you wanted to be friends” 

So let’s pause for a second and compare and contrast the two: Both are the niece, or at least sorta in Lena’s case, of Magica, both manipulate webby, and both are her first real friend: The 87 boys are little monsters and I don’t consider them friends or even brothers, while the 2017 ones are just that: brothers. Their her siblings in all but blood, not friends and have hteir own long complicated history. 

But otherwise the two are vastly different. Lena is a far more complex character as she’s been abused her whole life, is a rebel because Magica hardly gave her agency, and while she starts wooing webby out of self interest it’s clear even as far as the first episode she cares. Lena would gladly be part of the world if she could and this whole scheme is to gain that choice. 

Minma is still sympathetic but very different: She walls herself off because the other kids laugh and mock her for being herself and lashes out at them.. not unreasonably mind , but still feeling she needs no one else.. but as we’ll learn later she’s only helping Magica to finally feel accepted, to get all the fancy clothes and stuff that will make her popular instead of that grown woman masquerading as a kid for disturbing reasons. Minma is at her heart just a hurt kid desperate to fit in. And while Lena shares the desire for a place to belong.. it’s at it’s core much sadder. Lena.. wants a family. Someone to love her and to care about her and actually look after her. Minma has that she just wants to be loved. it’s similar but very diffrent and I can see why Lena evolved into what she did, as Frank and Matt ended up going in a far darker but ultimately more interesting direction. Minima is not a bad character at all though and without her I don’t think we would’ve had Lena, but at the end of the day the 87verse is just not that complicated, so the reboot needed something more and that more evolved into who we have now. 

Both kids excitedly talk about their new friends, with their respective guardians being distracted. Scrooge is distracted by the fact his car is a bit bumpy and Launchpad offers to fix it up for free with some parts from a buddy, which given the sentence “This won’t cost you anything” makes him erect, Scrooge agrees. Magica meanwhile, whose watching Minima while her mom is away which raises a LOT of questions we don’t have time for like who she is, is she’s poes wife or does Magica have other siblings... it’s a lot of questions we’re never going to get answers to. 

The next day Webby got the dime easy as Scrooge was distracted. so Minima swaps them while she’s distracted. But while swiping it was easy, which to be fair Webby is likely approved in his security so it woudln’t match her.. or the story just needed to progress. You make the call. 

Magica does the logical thing and goes and get sthe dime and the story ends there.. and i’m shitting you, she of course brags to scrooge, reveals minima as her spy, and offers to RACE him for it shortly after he realizes he has a fake.

The only major flaw in this story is Magica’s overconfdience, which isn’t BAD persay, but here has gotten to dumbass proportions. She just can’t plan for anything and a CHILD has a better plan than her that only dosen’t work for reasons we’ll get to. And that plan is almost ruined by Magica taunting scrooge!

So a race is on but Launchpad has transformed Scrooge’s old Model T into this

Damn that’s cool. Scrooge of course dosen’t like it, but honestly you get what you paid for. Oh that’s right you paid nothing for something you NEED to use every day for transportation. 

At  the rickity thickity bridge, Steve Buschemi’s worst roll and her minion ask Webby to roll with them and Minima mistakes this for betrayal planning to soak them all.. only for Webby to DEFEND HER, pointing out minma’s her friend, how she dresses is fine and she loves her no matter what.. the last part’s implied. The 30-year old asshole and her minon leave Webby and Minma is genuinely touched, as no one’s done that for her before. She put up so many walls... she didn’t realize someone could ACTUALLY care about her, so obessed with thinking she had to be like that soccer mom in preschoolers clothing, she just had to be herself: kinda werid but in that fun adams family way. Webby says she knows Minma would do the same.. so while she prepares to let’s get back to the race. Magica realizes Launchpad’s roadster is actually gaining and spreads some tacks, but Scrooge counters with some money.. because of course he has a lot of money in the trunk. But Magica takes out the bridge and while scrooge awesomely JUMPS IT... he’s still too late. 

As you probably guess though, Minima had a change of heart, and gave Webby the real dime back, and Scrooge confirms it. Minima TRIES to tell Magica, and Magica is horrified her niece is a goody goody “I”ll never hear the end of it at my astral aerobics class”.. I.. I want to see that. Let’s raise those spirit ladies and kick kick that soul, doge that shadow king punch them in the soul. Yes! Now eat it eat it and absorb it’s power!

We end on a button joke as Webby apologizes for taking the dime., Scrooge accepts it and Webby tells them magica learned to carpet and they gulp for some reason. 

Final Thoughts on Dime after Dime: This story was decent. It has problems, some jokes don’t land and Magica is made horribly incompetent, but minima’s character arc is endearing, and Webby herself is precious as always and her winning Minima over feels genuine. And Scrooge is in prime adoring uncle mode with her and i’ts just so cute. And the roadster race is pretty awesome to watch honestly. It’s an exceptional and enjoyable tie in story.. and not the last ducktales 87 story we’ll be covering here. Wink wonk. 

Next Time: Things get DARK as Lena and Webby head into the depths of Scrooge’s hidden bin and Lena heads into the depths of her own soul. 

Tommorow: Woo-Ooo mofos as we go back to the very beginning of the reboot! A family restored, a lost city to explore, and a glomgold rises! Be here or be square. 

[dweemeister]

Woman in the Moon (1929, Germany)

By the end of the 1920s, humanity could envision a world where spaceflight might be possible. Several decades before that, the science fiction books of Jules Verne, H.G. Wells, and others thrilled viewers with promise of adventure and the unknown. Also capturing that interest in space would be Georges Méliès’ film, A Trip to the Moon (1902, France) – even if you have never heard of this film, you may be familiar with its most iconic frame. A Trip to the Moon is one of the first science fiction films ever made and, for the 1900s decade, among the most innovative of its time. Though other filmmakers around the world dabbled in science fiction, the genre never truly took off until mid-century.

One of the few filmmakers bringing a sense of spectacle to sci-fi silent films was German director Fritz Lang, best known today for Metropolis (1927) and M (1931). Because of its release in between Metropolis and M, Woman in the Moon tends to be underseen and undermentioned. But, like Metropolis and A Trip to the Moon, it is a silent film exemplar of science fiction. It is a remarkable piece of entertainment in its second half, even as it wastes too much of its runtime on a tiresome subplots that involve gangsters and romance. When Lang brings his showmanship during the crew’s trip to the Moon, the results are unlike any other filmmaker working in cinema at that time.

Businessman Helius (Willy Fritsch) meets with his friend, Professor Mannfeldt (Klaus Pohl), to discuss developments over Helius’ plans to journey to the Moon. The mission was inspired by the Professor’s hypothesis that the Moon, “is rich in gold” – something that has attracted the mockery of his fellow academics. In the shadows, an unidentified gang sends a man calling himself “Walter Turner” (Fritz Rasp) to spy on Mannfeldt and Helius. More trouble comes to Helius when he learns his assistants Windegger (Gustav von Wangenheim) and Friede (Gerda Maurus) announce their engagement. Helius, who has never confessed his love for Friede, finds himself in an awkward romantic bind in the events leading up to launch. On launch day, Helius, his assistants, and Professor Manfeldt board the Friede. But their crew complement includes two others: Walter Turner (who threatens his way onboard) and a stowaway child, Gustav (Gustl Gstettenbaur).

Thea von Harbou, Lang’s wife from 1922-1933, wrote the screenplay, adapting her book The Rocket to the Moon. Just a quick glance through her filmography recalls a number of great Lang-von Harbou collaborations: Dr. Mabuse the Gambler (1922), the Die Nibelungen saga (1924), and Metropolis. She truly is one of the great screenwriters of early cinema, but Woman in the Moon is an underwhelming display of her talents. Von Harbou mires with its Earth-bound scenes, and Woman in the Moon reaps no benefits from its spy subplot. There is a straight science-fiction story buried somewhere in this overlong 169-minute film, but von Harbou overstuffs her screenplay with the potential sabotage of the rocket to the Moon. Never does the viewer feel that Lang’s astronauts are in danger of being blasted to smithereens in outer space or that “Walter Turner” will ever succeed in whatever murderous plots he has hatched. Isolated from whatever themes Woman in the Moon wishes to present, the love triangle that slowly overtakes the rest of the film always feels vestigial to this overcooked story. Compare this overwrought, yet underwritten romantic drama to Metropolis, where the relationship between Gustav Fröhlich’s Freder and Brigitte Helm’s Maria outlines perfectly the tension of their society’s industrial hierarchies and the geography that separates the classes.

Woman in the Moon truly defies gravity only after its launch and touchdown on the lunar surface. The cinematography team led by Curt Courant (1934’s The Man Who Knew Too Much, 1938’s La Bête Humaine) capture the terror of early spaceflight better than some of the more expensive American sci-fi productions would in the 1950s and ‘60s. The speculative lunar sets – which look more like Méliès’ vision for A Trip to the Moon than anything recognizable from the Moon – tower over the movie’s intrepid astronauts as they explore this lifeless (unlike Méliès’ vision) celestial body.

The screenplay, camerawork, production design, and special effects seen in The Woman in the Moon come from the most widely accepted scientific theories of the late 1920s concerning astrophysics and the nature of the Moon. Where some aspects might feel dated (that includes the appearance and breathable atmosphere of the lunar surface and the submersion of the rocket into water before launch), others are prescient. The explanation of how the rocket’s flightpath is so prophetic that it seems as if Thea von Harbou and Fritz Lang sat in on an Apollo mission briefing by NASA. Woman in the Moon also contains the first countdown to launch seen in a sci-fi film (yes, the launch countdown is an invention of Woman in the Moon), as well as a multistage rocket that jettisons parts of the rocket as it exits Earth’s atmosphere. Prior to launch, the rocket’s assembly in a separate structure before transportation out to the launchpad – where it will blast off to space. For a film released in an era that did not make much use of seat belts and Velcro, the utter violence and human disorientation of a rocket launch requires the astronauts to strap themselves into their bunks and hold onto surface restraints.

The frantic editing and startling cinematography of these scenes, coupled with the film’s undercurrent of distrust and ulterior motives, are a Lang staple during the most technically accomplished scenes of his filmography. It is there in the worker montages of Metropolis, the elaborate assassination scene of Dr. Mabuse the Gambler, and the horrific battle sequence of Die Nibelungen: Kriemhild’s Revenge. Those Lang hallmarks find their way late in Woman in the Moon, well past the point where they might have been effective in alleviating the film of its structural issues. Though Woman in the Moon might not be as influential as any of those aforementioned movies, Lang’s propulsive sense of action is apparent in the film’s second half. Like a silent era John Frankenheimer, Lang is in full control of the film’s tension – knowing when and when not to apply these techniques to heighten the viewer’s adrenaline.

Not nearly as a widely-discussed for Woman in the Moon is its final moments. The film’s concluding dilemma is startling. It precipitates into a situational solution that does not grant a narrative resolution. Are Lang and von Harbou attempting to comment on the lengths of selfishness, of the tension intrinsic between science and human avarice that can endanger others? Or is it more cynical of scientific discovery and technological progression than it might appear? Woman in the Moon wastes too much time on its romantic triangle before even approaching questions as nuanced as these.

However one interprets this, Woman in the Moon – more popular with general audiences than film critics and those noting that Universum Film AG (UFA) executive Alfred Hugenberg was beginning to align himself with the Nazi Party – arrived in German theaters at a time of political upheaval. Among the politically inclined, Woman in the Moon proved divisive: leftists derided its alleged Nazi subtext and the Nazis approved of this depiction of a technologically advanced, forward-thinking Germany. Shortly following Hitler’s ascendancy to German Chancellor in 1933, the Nazis banned A Woman in the Moon and seized the film’s rocket models due to how accurate its depiction of rocketry was. At this time, the Nazis, with a team led by Wernher von Braun, were deep into researching the V-2 rocket – the world’s first long-range guided ballistic missile.

Detractors of Woman in the Moon dismissed Lang and the film as curios of Germany’s cinematic past. With synchronized sound films all the rage since 1927, Woman in the Moon proved to be Lang’s final silent film. Today, the movie is Lang’s final epic, before he transitioned into a career leaning heavily on film noir. The scenes of greatest interest to silent film and sci-fi fans arrives deep in the film, after too many stultifying conversations and lovelorn looks from the main characters. In its greatest spurts, Woman in the Moon’s scientific speculation heralds a future beset by self-interest, yet heaven-bound.

My rating: 7/10

^ Based on my personal imdb rating. My interpretation of that ratings system can be found in the “Ratings system” page on my blog (as of July 1, 2020, tumblr is not permitting certain posts with links to appear on tag pages, so I cannot provide the URL).

For more of my reviews tagged “My Movie Odyssey”, check out the tag of the same name on my blog.

[crystallhamptonhersheykiss]

I've been rewatching Ducktales 2017 on Disney plus, and since the series finale is on March 15th. I thought it would be fun to go back and review the first two seasons. I've already did a review of season one, this is my review of season two.

Some of the positives of season two

* I liked that when the season opened up you knew what louies character arc was going to be this season, and I think it made a lot of sense. In the first season you saw the family always teasing Louie that he always messed things up, and in the second season he realized what his place in the family was and how he learned to be more humble when it came to money.

*while I wished he had actually apologized, I liked that Scrooge told Webby that she was family in The most dangerous game...Night. I think that might have been the easiest way for Scrooge to apologize to her after what he said in The last crash of the Sunchasher about how she wasn't family, even after telling her to call him Uncle Scrooge a few episodes before. But I think him calling her family would probably mean more to her instead of him just saying "I'm sorry."

* I liked that we got an entire episode focusing on Glomgold as a character and seeing how his rivalry with Scrooge started.

*Della's reunion with her family was really emotional and I think the show handled it well. I liked that the boys all reacted differently to meeting Della, while they were all happy to meet her I think Louie's reaction was the most realistic.

*The fact that Della had to slow down and figure out how she was going to fit into the family now. The show could have had everyone act like that Della suddenly show up wasn't a big deal. But it was, the family admitted that it was going to be hard getting used to her living there now, and Louie admitting he didn't know how to feel that he suddenly had a mother when he never had one before.

*The conversation that Scrooge and Della had in the garage. Della being upset that Scrooge said she wasn't a Mom. Scrooge wasn't wrong when he said that. At the time, she wasn't a parent to the boys the same way Donald was. I also liked that Scrooge told her she couldn't make up 10 years of being gone in one night and needed to slow down and take the time to get to know the kids better and she did do that for the rest of the season.

*the origins and reveals of Drake Mallard/Darkwing and Negaduck. I liked that this version of Drake is a good person who wants to help and inspire people, the same time though he does have a lot of the same flaws as the original Darkwing. So he doesn't feel like a completely different character from the original show.

*The reveal that the fan/actor from the signing and the new Darkwing was actually Drake Mallard. I liked how they revealed his name when Launchpad let him sign the poster, and that Jim Starling wasn't Drake Mallard at all. (I saw a couple theories that Jim Starling was maybe just a stage name.)

*The set up and reveal that Jim Starling was going to become Negaduck. As I've seen others point out, Jim was never a nice guy even before he found out about the movie, he was rude to his fans and instead of appreciating the fans he had, he was complaing that he wasn't more popular.

I also really liked the ending of the episode when they revealed the purple dye coming off of the costume and it was actually the same colors as Negaduck's outfit. And also his last words being "they want grim and gritty huh, happy to play the part."

While we don't know much about him before he became Darkwing, I think Jim might be a good example of "You either die a hero or live long enough to see yourself become the villain." Not only that but the show proves that Darkwing needs Gosalyn and Launchpad so he doesn't become bitter like Jim did.

Even before the ending there was a lot of hints that Jim would become Negaduck. (the crazy eyes he had when he locked Drake up, the chainsaws and the red and yellow balloons at the signing are Negaducks colors)

*Donald's reaction to seeing Della's ship and their reunion. Donald's voice actor did a great job when he said Della's name for the first time and liked that the two of them were able to have a reunion and how even though they both wanted to be mad at each other, they missed each other too much to stay mad for long.

* The reveal of Fowl coming out of the shadows and coming for the family. I liked the reveals that Gandra Dee was a Fowl agent and that John D. Rockerduck was still alive.

Some mixed/negatives things about season two.

*I wish the season had focused more on Scrooge and Glomgold's bet. Considering what Louie's arc was this season, I think it would have made more sense if Glomgold was the main villain of the season and the season finale was about Scrooge losing the bet and trying to get his company back instead of moonvasion. Considering how important his fortune is to Scrooge, I thought that would have been a big focus this season. At times it felt like the show forgot about the bet.

*I didn't like how they tried to make it a joke in Nothing can stop Della Duck when every time they mentioned Donald's vacation we saw him screaming in the spaceship and being terrified the whole time. It wasn't funny at all. And that's one of my few negatives in that episode.

*Another thing I didn't like with Donald is that the family never realized that Donald was missing and being held on the moon. One of my biggest negatives with this show is how they treat Donald. If Lunaris was going after the Mcduck family I think it would have made sense if he told Della, "Not only am I coming to take over the earth but I also have your brother." I think instead of running away with the kids and hiding, I think Della should have spent part of the episode trying to rescue Donald.

*I honestly think The richest duck in the world would have made for a better season finale instead of Moonvasion.

Overall I really liked season two. I do prefer season two over season one. Again feel free to agree or disagree with anything that I said. I do want to review season three but I know I'll have to wait for it to come on Disney plus.

Some of my favorite episodes of the season are

The Duck knight returns

The most dangerous game...night

The Ballard of Duke Baloney

Nothing can stop Della Duck

Raiders of the doomsday vault

The 87 cent solution.

Treasure of the lost lamp.

[the-fifth-marauder03]

Teasing

Notes: hola peoples. This is my second smut so it might still suck. I hope you like it, I wrote I for your pleasure. Make sure to comment your thoughts. If you want to be in the taglist message me and ask. Also my requests are open.

Warnings: 18+, its smut so theres gonna be quite a few warnings buddy. Dirty talk, teasing, rough sex, some other stuffs. IF YOU AFE NOT 18+ THEN DO NOT FUCKING READ. DO NOT GET ME BANNED.

---——---------------------------

Y/n was hiding. 

Natasha had been hounding her for weeks after she let it slip that she had a crush on the team. She'd done everything to catch y/n off guard. Cooking with her when it was her, movie nights with endless interrogation, Natasha even questioned her in the shower. So now y/n was going to hide until Natasha dropped it. The problem was that Natasha is a spy meaning if she wants to she will find y/n and that's exactly what she did. 

"Really y/n, the roof?" She was picking at her manicure in a bored fashion.

Y/n huffed crossing her arms, "At the time I thought it was clever."

Natasha rolled her eyes at the girl, she was once a master assassin Natasha knew y/n could do better. "You're just being lazy." 

"Yeah, yeah," Her own eyes rolling in the process, " I assume you are here to interrogate me." She glances at the redhead over her shoulder." 

"Now why would I do that when I already know who it is?" 

"Oh yeah, and who is it?" Y/n took a long pull from her water bottle. 

"Bucky." It was short, simple, and factual. 

Y/n choked mid gulp, Natasha has caught her. " I'm not even going to ask how you know because it probably involves my diary and that in itself discomforting." 

Natasha laughed, "No I didn't your diary, great idea for my next mission though. Sweetie, I'm a spy, I pay attention to body language and yours around Barnes screams crush." 

Y/n looked down sheepishly, "Is it that obvious?" 

Natasha quickly reassured her, "Well not to Barnes, he's just as oblivious as you are." 

"For James to be oblivious it would have to mean he likes me back, which he doesn't." She looked over her shoulder at the ginger in time to see her retreating smile. 

"Whatever you say y/n/n," was her departing sentence. 

Y/n huffed but figured she could go inside without being harassed. It was getting late and she had to go on a mission first thing so sleep was the top priority. But y/n wanted to stay outside for just a while longer and enjoy the weather. When she did finally trudged inside, empty water bottle in hand, y/n bumped into Bucky. He grabbed her shoulders to steady her before casually leaning on the wall.

"Oh hey, Buck, what's up?"

"Just finished my walk around the compound. Was gonna come and sit with you but you were talking to Natasha," He shrugged with a smirk on his face, "Didn't want to interrupt." 

Y/n smiled at the supersoldier and nodded her head, "Well I'm headed to bed, gotta get some sleep before tomorrow." 

Bucky grinned, he would be on that mission with her. "Save me a seat next to ya, sweetheart? I don't want Sam stealing my spot next to ya." 

Y/n's head was running a mile a minute. sweetheart, that's new. HIS spot next to her. If he was like this now he would have killed her in the forties. "Wouldn't dream of letting bird-brain steal your spot, James." She laughed nervously, sidestepping him, "I'll see you tomorrow, okay?" 

Bucky kept his charming grin on his face as she started to walk away, "See you tomorrow doll." 

Y/n had never felt the need to escape to her room so strongly in her life. She needed to calm down before this mission or she would explode. So as many girls do when frustrated she took a long hot shower and went to bed.

The next morning

Y/n woke up with a start, looking around trying to remember where she was. As she connected that she was in her room she looked at her clock, she had twenty minutes to get up and ready. She sprinted around her room collecting her things. Her small duffle rested packed at the end of her bed. It was filled with a change of clothes and so wipes to clean herself up, the mission was only one day so they didn't need much. She slipped into her tight catsuit and zipped it up before doing her hair. Y/n did a simple braid to keep her hair out her eyes in case anything went drastically wrong and then sprinted down to the quinjet launchpad. 

When she arrived she noticed the rest of her was already there and waiting. Steve was in the piolet seat next to clint, Sam was putting everyone's thing on the jet, and Bucky and Natasha were talking, suspiciously, as y/n drew closer. After handing her bag and staff to Sam she climbed the ramp and took notice that the spot Natasha had previously been occupying was now empty and being invitingly offered by Bucky. When she sat down he spoke up. 

"Doll, I thought we agreed you were going to save me a seat, not the other way around." He was smiling charmingly at her as he spoke cause a blush to rise to her cheeks. 

"I woke up late, so I didn't have time." She looked down sheepishly. 

He chuckled at her shyness, "It's okay doll, I got here early anyway. Plus I'm sitting next to pretty dame so I'm not too mad." 

Y/n looked up at him surprised, "You think I'm pretty?" Sure she had received compliments before but Bucky's felt genuine and natural. 

"Sure I do doll." He was fully grinning at her. 

"Thank you, James." She returned his smiles before looking out the window, watching the land get smaller as they ascended. 

For a long time, everything was quiet, Natasha reading a book, Sam was messing with redwing, and Steve and Clint were quietly talking about Clint's family. Y/n's suit was starting to irritate her, her chest felt suffocated, her thighs were being constricted, and with Bucky sitting next to her in his gear y/n thoughts were running wild. As her thoughts got dirtier and dirtier y/n started to fidget while still looking out the window. 

Bucky leaned into her enough for her to feel him pressing into her back, "Sweatheart, whats got you fidgeting like that? You're never nervous for a fight." 

"My suits annoying me, the leather is uncomfortable." SHe whined.

"It might be uncomfortable but it makes your body look irresistible." He punctuated his sentence by leaning forward more and lightly nipping just above the neck of her suit. Then he sat back and looked like happened, and y/n contained the whimper that bubbled her throat. Before she could reply called that they would be landing in ten and to start suiting up. Y/n stood went to the weapons rack to retrieve her guns. Once she had the first four in the holsters on either thigh and hip she looked for her favourite one. Much to her disadvantage, it was on the top shelf. As she reached up to grab it she felt a warm hard chest on her back and saw Bucky's metal hand grab the weapon for her. She turned to face him once he stepped back, he handed her the gun then spoke while leaning into her. 

"Careful doll, seeing you stretched out like that might give a man bad thoughts." His voice was calm, measure, dangerous.

Y/n bit her lip "Oh really James, and what kind of thoughts would those be?" 

Bucky growled but Steve yelled for everyone to move out before he could reply. As she walked past him y/n could have sworn she felt his hand slide up the back of her thigh. 

Not five minutes after leaving the quinjet had the fighting begun. Steve and Natasha were fighting their way to the intel room of the compound retrieve what they came for. Clint was doing what he does best from the roof, dropping enemies like flies. True to his name, Sam was picking people off like a bird of prey and dropping them from high altitudes. Bucky and y/n were fighting back to back, shooting when they could and fighting when they had to. 

One of the men knocked the gun out of y/n's hand and lounged for her. Bucky turned just in time to witness her wrapping her thighs around the man's head and using his leverage to take him down. As she raised her self and took a pistol out of the holster on her hip, he couldn't help the cheeky remark that came from him. 

"Now that was a pretty sight. You gonna do that to me when we get home sugar?" He smirked as she hesitated then regained her composure. 

"Only if you ask nicely." It's flirty and Bucky feels his cock stir in his pants.

"Promise?" He quirks a brow 

Her attention is drawn from him before she can answer as another soldier charges her. After she takes him down she sees Natasha's red hair whipping toward the jet with Steve, Clint, and Sam racing behind her waving to the pair. Y/n grabs Bucky's hand and they take off in a dead sprint. 

"Come on James, our ride is ready to go."

They climbed the ramp as the doors closed and plopped into seats. Steve turned when everyone settled, "Get some rest we're debriefing as soon as we get home." 

Sam stretched out on the floor as Natasha laid her head on Clint's lap as he reclined easily in his seat. Y/n glanced at Bucky to find him already looking at her. 

"Bucky can I lean on you? If not that's fine." She asked nervously. 

"Yeah doll, go ahead I don't mind at all," Bucky smiled easily and offered his arm. Y/n smiled back and wrapped her arms around Bucky' s

before resting her head on his shoulder. When she got comfortable she sighed contently and Bucky rested his head on top of hers before they both dosed. 

Y/n woke up with something hard and heavy enclosed around her, as she looked down she recognised Bucky's metal arm. She looked at Natasha to find her already warmly smiling at her, "We're almost back at the compound, you should wake him up soon." She nodded her head towards and when y/n turned to look at him she discovered him sleeping soundly. A brief thought crossed her mind before she decided against it. do I have t? He looks so peaceful and pretty. Gently y/n shook Bucky awake, as he came to he looked at her with a dopy little smile before she told him they were home. 

It seemed Bucky had woken up more on the short walk the briefing room because he made sure sit directly next to y/n. As Ross droned on about the importance of the mission y/n felt Bucky lean over to her and whisper, "So does the offer of you wrapping your thighs around my head still stand?" 

Y/n rolled her eyes but decided to play along just to see what James wanted, "I told you if you asked me nicely." 

"Okay doll," He smiled sweetly, "then can I pretty please have you wrap those gorgeous thighs around my head so I can tongue fuck you?" Y/n clenched her thighs and Bucky took notice of her reaction continuing to speak lowly in her ear. " I wish I could bend you over this table and fuck you right now but alas we have behave." 

Y/n whimper and cleared her throat before responding, "James if you aren't serious then you need to stop right now." 

"Oh sweetheart I'm dead serious and I fully intend on showing you when this meeting is over." He growled. 

Y/n nodded her head but didn't reply and Bucky said nothing more. Ross continued to bore them for another two hours before he gave then permission to leave. As everyone stood to exit the room Bucky placed his hand on y/n thigh for her to remain seated. After the last person filed out, he looked at her kindly, "Before I touch you, are you one hundred per cent certain that you want to do this? I'm not going to force you to do anything." 

"Yes I'm sure James, I've liked you for a while and I want to do this with you." And just like that his whole demeanour changed, the sincerity was still there but it was overlapped with desire. 

"Your room or mine?" It was a low growl, The man hadn't even touched her yet and she was already shaking. 

"Yours" It was breathy and desperate. They both stood and Bucky didn't even give her a chance to take a step before he was haling her over his shoulder and walking out of the room. Natasha was standing there as they exited the room, "Finally shot your shot, Barnes?" 

"No Nat I'm just practising my fireman carry" Came his snarky remark as he started to walk away. 

Natasha laughed and said, "Have fun." 

Y/n looked up from where she was looking at Bucky's backside, "I already am, I have the perfect view of his ass." 

Natasha burst into giggles as they turned the corner towards his room and Bucky smacked y/n's ass in return. 

Due to Bucky's long strides, the pair reached his room quickly. When they reached the door Bucky set her down and stared at her for a moment before kissing her. The kiss in itself was sweet but was not what you'd expect from a first kiss, it had a heat that made y/n lose her breath. Continuing to kiss her he placed his palm on the scanner, he walked her backwards through the door when it opened. As soon as the door closed he had her catsuit unzipped and was sliding her shirt over her head while she grabs at his. 

"Do you wanted me?" He licked at her lips. 

"Yes." She whimpered.

"Do you want me to touch you?" He growled.

"Yes James, please just touch me." She was begging and he liked that. 

"Okay baby, I'll touch you." With that, he released her completely going to lay on his back on the bed. She whined pathetically and shuffled around a bit before he spoke again, "You promised me you would wrap your thighs around my face and I intend to collect that right now." 

A needy whine left her lips and she made her way to the bed and stripped off the rest of her clothing and got onto the bed. Bucky must have felt she wasn't moving fast enough so he grabbed her by her hips and placed her on his waiting face. His tongue was magical. He traced around her lips to collect with juices that had already flowed from her. Suddenly he licked a broad stripe across the entirety of her. He nipped at her clit lightly before soothing with his tongue. He had barely started and y/n was already falling apart. He thrust his tongue as far as it would go inside her as curled it was if he were eating icecream. The more he did it the more y/n shook. he seemed to be a man starved because he was making almost as much noise as her. 

"James, I'm gonna come." Bucky pulled his tongue and traced his name across her clit as a final push. She came violently. No one had taken the time to make her cum the way Bucky did and it took her a minute to recover before climbing off of him. 

He wiped his chin with the back of his hand and let out a little breath. He had a goofy smile on his face when he spoke, "I've wanted to do that for so long."

"We aren't done yet." Was her breathy response. 

"Oh, I know. I just have thought about doing specifically that since Tony designed your new catsuit." He had rolled over and was kissing up and down her neck leaving marks her and there. 

"James, I need you." She wanted him no if, and, or buts about it. 

"Before we do this I need to know what this is. Is it a one and done or is it more?" He sounded uncertain now.

Y/n grabbed his face and made him look at her, "James this could never be a one and done thing, but I swear to god if you don't get naked and inside me, I will take care of myself. " 

He scurried off the bed and stripped out of his remaining clothing in record time. When he looked up at her again his pupils were wider than ever. "Babydoll can you do me a favour and get on your hands and knees for me." 

Y/n rolled and raised herself, basically presenting herself to him. "Such a good girl baby, and look at how pretty this pussy is. I bet it'll feel nice and tight around me, squeezin me, if it'll even let me in." He climbed back on the bed and positioned himself behind her.

 "You gonna let me in pretty girl?" The tip of his cock brushed against her as he waited for her reply. 

She bowed her head and spread her legs more, "Yes sir" 

Bucky entered her in one swift motion and set an easy pace. He was right she did feel good, downright heavenly. She was squeezing around him so tight he thought he was going to burst. Y/n could only let out incoherent cries as he filled her so nicely. The tip of his cock was brushing her g-spot repetitively but his pace was to slow. 

"James go faster." she needed him to pick up the pace. He'd already been teasing her all day.

"Beg me, beg me to take you like a good little girl. beg me to make you mine." His voice was deeper than ever. 

"Good god please James, please go faster. I'll be a good girl, please baby. Please, please, please stop teasing."  She was getting desperate and she knew at this pace she wouldn't. Bucky obliged and started to slam into her brutally. His pace moved her up with every thrust but she was pushing back against him to meet them. 

"Are you gonna cum for me, baby? I can feel you squeezin me. Are you gonna come on my cock like a good girl? Huh? You gonna be my good girl?" He was getting sloppy which meant he was close, his moans matching y/n's. With a final thrust, y/n was sent spiralling over the edge. 

Bucky growled as he came "Mine" and "Y/n" filled the room as he slowly came down. He rolled and landed next to her and felt her fingers intertwine with his as they cooled off. After sometime y/n spoke "That was... Wow." 

Bucky turned over and wrapped his arm around her, "I agree. I'm really glad I get to do this now." He grinned at her 

She smiled back before snuggling closer to him. "Yeah me too."

Bucky rested his head on hers and they went to sleep. 

@prettybabyboyjay

[aion-rsa]

DuckTales Season 3 Episode 22 Review: The Last Adventure!

https://ift.tt/eA8V8J

This DUCKTALES review contains spoilers.

From the opening moments of DuckTales’ final episode it feels like the end. Almost everyone is here. There’s an extra care put into the scenes, a knowledge that we are in the last hour of their adventures. A last moment of uncomplicated joy before things get messy. And at the center of it all?

Webby. In the beginning she seemed to be the POV character of DuckTales, the one everything seemed to focus around. Some of that was caused by the original air dates of the episodes accidentally putting all her focus episodes at the start but it was a feeling that never left me. The show was an ensemble piece but there was something about Webby that kept her at the forefront. Something that made go, “if anyone had to lay claim as the main character of DuckTales, it’s her.” Boy, was I right about that!

The finale puts her in the middle of everything and finally pays off the mystery set-up at the top of the season. We finally learn about her past and as its slowly revealed it tugs on Webby’s biggest heartstring. Family. 

Her clones May and June press her with questions about the family. How none of the people she has connections with are related to her by blood. They aren’t her REAL family. Scrooge’s family isn’t hers. Her friends aren’t family. They play on a fear that’s been deeply held within her, that for all the talk of family is what you make it they still aren’t REALLY family.

It calls into question that critical core element of this new DuckTales. One could argue the show has done a LOT to say family is what you make it and this shouldn’t be a problem for Webby but come on, she has two sisters right in front of her. That would mess with her head and make her feel insecure.

This question of family extends out of Webby’s plotline and to all the others, especially Donald and Della. Donald wants to go off on a big trip with Daisy, intentionally leaving the family behind for the first time in who knows how long. This is a major step for him. He gave up his life to help raise Huey, Dewey, and Louie. He’s stuck by them even as they lived at the mansion. The guy deserves some time with the person he cares about without the weight of responsibility he’s carried for so much of his life.

Della though can’t take it. She tries to get him to reconsider. She has excuse after excuse but the real reason comes out, she doesn’t want to lose any more time with him. She was gone for so long why can’t he stay and make up for that lost time? He could, but as much as Donald loves Della he’s finally putting himself first. Of course Della accepts it because she’s Della and she’s great. I’m so happy they did this with Donald, the guy deserves it. Just because Della wants to spend more time with him doesn’t mean he HAS to. He can take time for himself, he can be his own person, he doesn’t have to be defined by the loss of Della anymore. Of course he’ll still see her and the rest of the family, he’s just going off to start his own part of the family. That’s a crucial element of family as well; you don’t always have to be together.

But of course when Webby and Huey get kidnapped Donald is right there to help and so is everyone else. The whole family rallies together, though Beakley is off on her own. Earlier in the episode Beakley revealed to Webby that she retired specifically because of her. That Webby was more important than anything else and, as we later learn, she gave up taking out F.O.W.L. to do it. There’s a running theme of how much you’ll sacrifice for your family here, as Beakley puts it, “when you find your family you’ll give up everything for them.” It’s well threaded throughout the episode, the biggest example of it of course being the giant mission to storm the temple.

It’s here the family comes up against the biggest nemesis of the series, Bradford. Bradford’s whole deal is that he was the first Woodchuck (and a terrible one.) He wants to rid the world of adventure, contain all the chaos it brings. What does all this mean? Why is he doing this? On first watch it’s a little unclear but when you zoom out Bradford wants to keep the world in order, in check. No deviations, nothing unexpected, no challenges, nothing unpredictable. He claims he’s a businessman, not a villain… but of course he’s a villain because a LOT of business people ARE villainous. Wanting to keep the world in check and playing by their rules is how they keep control. How they stay in power.

Adventures threaten that. They give power to those who don’t have it; they allow a wonder and mystery to fill the world. To give people hope, to bond them together. For Scrooge, it helped create his family. So of course Bradford would try to shut that down, he’s better served if people are unhappy and under his thumb as a businessman. Controlling Scrooge’s money was also a great bonus.

Bradford threatens the very heart of the series, adventures. He uses Webby specifically to gain the ability to take Scrooge’s adventures away… but of course he underestimated the family. He thought creating Webby’s clones would tear them apart, that separating everyone into cages would keep them from rising up… but you can’t stop the Duck family and Webby is the heart and soul of that. Even when she learns she was just another clone that doesn’t stop her for long. For anyone else that might have been a bigger blow but when she learns that Beakley saved her when she was a baby? That Beakley gave up everything for her so that someone would love her? That keeps her going.

That and the fact she’s (more or less) Scrooge’s daughter. Yeah she was made by F.O.W.L. but WHATEVER SHE’S REALLY A BLOOD PART OF THE FAMILY! At this point I was taken aback. Why does Webby NEED to have a blood relation to the family? Why can’t she just be a friend who became a part of the family? Isn’t that what DuckTales has been preaching for its entire run, you don’t have to be related by blood to be family and even if you ARE related by blood that doesn’t always mean you’re like family to someone else.

Some might consider this an easy cop out, a way for Webby to get what she always wants… but it’s so much more than that. Okay yes, Webby was sort of made from Scrooge’s DNA but that still doesn’t automatically make her a part of the family. They could easily reject her for not being “real.”  But everyone in the McDuck family loves her and that’s why she’s family, blood or not. Plus, the rest of the episode goes out of its way to show that damn near every good person the team has met is part of the family. So yes, Webby is now confirmed to be related by blood but that doesn’t undercut DuckTales’ message about family. Lena and Violet are part of the family, Gizmoduck, Darkwing Duck, Gosalyn, Launchpad, EVERYONE. As Webby tells May and June,

“Family are the people who stick by you. Fight for you. Blindly invade a sinister villain’s secret strong hold for you. Family would do anything to keep you safe and sacrifice everything to love you no matter who and what you are. Like Scrooge, like my granny, like you two.” That’s family and that’s DuckTales. Scrooge is willing to sacrifice it all, to give up adventuring… but FAMILY is the greatest adventure of all! It’s so powerful it breaks the most powerful magic contract of ALL TIME. BOOM, FAMILY! 

‘The Last Adventure’ was nothing short of an absolute masterpiece, the closest thing to a true 2017 DuckTales movie we’ll ever get. The action was big, damn near every character from the show made it in, and it capped off everything so beautifully. It’s stunning how many references and characters are squeezed in here but it never feels rushed or over bloated. All the references work, whether you know the deep cuts or not. My personal favorite was the revelation that Manny is no intern… he’s actually The Headless Manhorse of the Apocalypse AND HE LIVES AGAIN… voiced by Keith David. It’s such an elaborate Gargoyles reference but even if you don’t know that it’s hilarious to see this new side of Manny.

There’s too many moments to talk about. So many little bits that could deserve full articles on their own. Della using her leg like an axe, B.O.Y.D. being just a head, or Launchpad becoming Gizmoduck! If you’ve been reading all my DuckTales reviews you know how much I’ve loved the character of Lena and just seeing her there at the end as part of the family made me smile and warmed my heart. She went through so much and look where she is now, she has people who love her AND she’s a superhero. 

As the credits rolled and all the characters we’ve all grown to love soared past the screen for the final time, it hit me just how much I’m going to miss DuckTales. I’ve reviewed every single episode of the series and it has been an immense privledge. The level of care and creativity that went into every single aspect of the series did not go unnoticed. The people behind the scenes truly delivered something special, a series that will stand the test of time as not just a worthy entry into the Duck universe or just a Disney cartoon series, but as an absolutely wonderful show all on its own. It was incredibly funny, joyously warm, and knew how to hit you with some major life lessons. Lena’s story arc in particular will always stick with me and works as a gut wrenching portrayal of the effects of abuse. Her story was just an example of DuckTales as its strongest, when it was able to use it stories to hold up a mirror to our own lives and safely let us explore them. While also giving us a lot of laughs.

DuckTales has power; it’ll keep having power. Now that the show’s ended I have no doubt more people will check it out on Disney + and realize how special it was. How great it was. How even if it still had more stories to tell it still gave all it had. 

Thank you for everything, DuckTales. You’ll never be forgotten. 

DuckTales Quotes To Make Your Life Better

-“No, no maniacal laughter! We are not common villains.”

-“Come with me if you want DEW-live.”

-“Yes I was right! …. Oh no, I was right.”

-“I LIVE AGAIN… Again.”

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-“Please hold all startled utterances of disbelief for the end.”

The post DuckTales Season 3 Episode 22 Review: The Last Adventure! appeared first on Den of Geek.

from Den of Geek https://ift.tt/2Q9vozW

[strawberrytheduck]

Belle Quacks-Chapter 16

It was Morgana’s birthday and of course Belle wanted to celebrate with her. Morgana wanted a small party, that was fine as she said the Fearsome Four could come along. Liquidator said that something important came up so he couldn’t but the others agreed to go. Drake, a friend of Morgana’s, LP and Camellia would be there too. One problem: Morgana’s dad was going to show up. Belle wanted to get to know him like the good girlfriend she is but she was never great with meeting people’s parents due to her own experiences. Camellia’s were great but Drake said some stuff about Morgana’s dad. “He’s not a fan of ‘normals’, as their family calls us, he likely might not be very happy.” He was almost instantly chastised by Camellia and Launchpad for telling her that. She was promised that she had nothing to worry about. When he showed up, he instantly walked up to Morgana and wrapping her in a hug. To Belle and Jack, he looked like something out of a horror movie. Moloculo’s red eye landed on them for a second, a falter in his smile evident. Quackerjack giggled, saying how cool and creepy he was. Belle agreed on the creepy. He seemed nice to Bushroot, not surprising given his mutant status, and Camellia by extension. He was civil with Drake, his adorable daughter Gosalyn and Launchpad but he just scowled at Belle, Quackerjack and Megavolt. Quacky and Elmo went over to Bushroot for a while as Morgana walked over to her. “How are you, Sweet? Are you too overwhelmed?” Belle shook her head. Morgana’s dad walked over to them, looking down at Belle.

She avoided eye contact, fiddling with her bracelet. “Dad, this is my girlfriend. Her name is Belle.” Morgana introduced her to him. He looked between the two, not seeming super surprised. Maybe he expected someone more confident? “I see. Might I talk with her? Alone?” Belle visibly jolted slightly when Mr. Macawber’s large, sort-of-clawed hand gently gripped her shoulder. Morgana looked nervous, nodding before walking off. He told her to look him in the eyes, which she tried but she couldn’t, She was never great at it. She was then asked a couple questions that she wouldn’t answer because she was nervous. After looking at her necklace and the jewellery Morgana had been wearing, he opted to start there. “My little ghoul was never super fond of jewellery but I noticed that she’s been wearing it more. Her necklace matches yours, did you happen to make it?” Belle started infodumping about jewellery and how she often did it to show that she cared. She also went on a tangent about how she went about picking what kind of jewellery to make until she noticed him looking down at her, one eyebrow tilted up. She answered his questions normally after that, still not looking at him, gripping her skirt tightly. “Do you think you’re good enough for my daughter?” He asked. She shook her head. “She’s too good for me and yet... she wants to be with me.” Belle said. Stating that she was greatly honoured to be with Morgana but Morgana deserved better shortly after. Moloculo could tell something was wrong. She wasn’t the same as most normals he’d met, the way she easily spoke so much about one thing when asked and the lack of eye contact. She was nervous around him but he felt that it wasn’t because of his appearance. He wasn’t sure why he thought that. Morgana walked back over, hugging Belle as her dad walked over to the three supervillains.

“I-I’m sorry, y-your dad probably hates me, I-I’m not g-good with parents.” Belle said, flapping her hands. Morgana shushed her, holding her comfortingly. The sorceress watched her dad talk to Jackson, likely asking more about Belle. Gradually, he was getting a better understanding and then more angry. Megavolt’s whiskers also started sparking like a faulty wire and Bushroot’s arms started growing thorns. Camellia looked at him sadly, likely confirming. She had a sickening feeling that she knew what they were talking about, Camellia having already told her in private. Mr. Macawber looked like he was about to explode due to his anger. Belle was watching too, hanging onto Morgana in concerned. She had a right to be concerned. Moloculo gave his daughter a look before pointing to the front door. She nodded, telling Belle she’d be right back. The two Macawbers stepped outside, one seething with rage. “Were her parents really that shitty? I’m sorry for doing this on your birthday, babybat but I have to know.” She bit her beak, nodding. She also told him about how Belle was like a friend of hers. “That explains the excessive talking about jewellery. Where do her parents live? I’ll teach them how to properly raise children!” No matter how Moloculo felt about normals, he would not let a normal child be treated that way, it was improper. “Dad, they haven’t spoken in years. She’s going to therapy, she’ll be fine.” She could see him relax, smiling warmly at her. “It’ll take a while for me to trust her and warm up to her but she’s welcome to talk anytime.” He said, walking back indoors.

Belle hugged Morgana once she walked in, happy to see her okay. She knew Belle worried, even if she knows her dad would never hurt her. Morgana kissed her girlfriend chastely on the beak, stroking the back of her hand with her thumb. The shorter duck smiled, wishing her a happy birthday. ”With you around, I will.” A cheesy thing to say but that was exactly what Belle liked. Eek and Squeak rested on Belle’s shoulders, nuzzling her. Her familiars and Belle got used to each other very easy and quickly, even if Archie likes to scare Belle at times, so Morgana was hopeful when it came to her family. Especially after her dad’s reaction, he seemed to care about her. He smiled at Belle a little who waved nervously. Two of the most important people in Morgana’s life had finally met, even if it didn’t go well and they didn’t know a lot about each other, Morgana was happy that they at least met.

[nodesiretogrowup]

LET’S GET READY TO RE-CAAAAAAAAP

“I have numerous science-based questions” I mean, same. It also sets up that Huey is gonna be out of his element this episode

SCROOGE HAS NO TIME FOR SCIENCE

“I AM THAT CHAMPION.” A bit full of yourself there. I couldn’t hear this line without saying “I’M. THAT. HERO.” Oh VeggieTales, you’ll always be with me

THEY ALL LOOK SO ADORABLE!!

I like that Louie does a finger gun when Scrooge gets to him

Like I said earlier, I DO NOT care Scrooge already putting pressure on these kids

Poor Dewey seems like he’s the unfavorite, which is probably how Donald felt as well

Huey makes a good point and I do NOT like how dismissive Scrooge is of the twins

That being said...they totally killed someone in battle

SOMEDAY WE’LL FIND IT, THE RAINBOW CONNECTION!

Why didn’t Launchpad crash? I know he can land w/o crashing but it’s usually when he lands in water. THIS FEELS IMPORTANT SOMEHOW though it probably isn’t

“THEY FOUND A WAY TO MAKE RAINBOWS BETTER!” God, I love Webby

“This is the best day.” WEBBY, YOU ARE REACHING CRITICAL LEVELS OF ADORABLE

Birds with beards look odd

“Yeah, sure. Of course.” Poor Huey, magic and mythology aren’t his strong point

I love that it says Odin’s Closet over the shirts. It’s the little details

“Guess Louie knows what Louie’s doing today.” And then he disappears into the shirts. I can appreciate someone who knows what they’re about

I want ALL the shirts from this episode!

“WHOA, IT’S WRESTLING!” He looks so dang happy, it’s ADORABLE

“THIS IS AWESOME!” Chanting is fun

“So these guys just copied professional wrestling?” Huey, you’re form of logic is not welcome here

Does that mean Scrooge told someone about his battles and inspired them to create pro wrestling? I’m gonna go with that

“And they will love me for it!” Dewey, sweetie, that’s only how it works half the time

I loved all the man-snake stuff. Made me giggle

Man snake be THICC. HOT DAMN

I love the little pig ref. HE’S SO CUTE

Jormungandr knows how to pump up a crowd

So, like, is everyone in the audience technically DEAD?! That makes this episode slightly darker. I dig it

 I wonder if Jormungandr sees Earth’s destruction as a good thing for Earth. Like if he genuinely thinks they’d be better off in Valhalla. Or if he’s just a bastard who wants to watch the world burn

Scrooge is a bit too into playing the heel

The way Scrooge moves and the faces he makes as the Millionaire Miser remind me of Glomgold

“I watch a lot of wrestling while I fly.” “Wait, while?” This exchange always cracks me up

“Uncle Scrooge is the greatest hero of all time.” “Huh, I guess not everyone thinks so.” I feel like this is foreshadowing later events

RIP Announcer Puffin

“DIBS ON ANNOUNCING!” A dude just got KO’d bro! Have a bit of respect

And the return of the dynamic sports announcer duo. Glad Huey got his badge

I NEED MORE WRESTLING ANNOUNCER LP

Strongbeard is DOPE

“How did you know that?” “Just calling it like I see it. WRESTLING!” The real reason Launchpad knows is because he’s actually Thor but doesn’t remember. I WILL DIE ON THIS HILL

FEAR THE BEARD

“What matters is I’m doing the right thing.” I don’t know, you really seem to enjoy being a heel

This whole match is great

Dewey, there ARE NO RULES IN WRESTLING. Plus you aren’t the ref, so you can’t make that call

I have very inappropriate jokes go through my head when only one arm absorbs the beard energy

“I am so confused.” CONSTANT MOOD

DID SCROOGE NARUTO RUN AT STRONGBEARD?!

I like that Scrooge dives onto him the same way he dives into his bin

LP is so excited he pushes Huey out of the way for NO REASON

HOLY FUCK THAT DUDE THREW A CHAIR AT A CHILD!

All the bone cracking in this episode made me uncomfortable, as in my bones hurt during it

“He is such a good guy.” I’d say he’s a fair guy, not necessarily a good guy

“Which two of you will fight for me?” Webby has been waiting for this moment her WHOLE LIFE

Louie, always taking time to make that money

Who gave him a shirt cannon?!

I love that the dude comes up wearing the shirt

Dewey just slaps Scrooge in the face

Champ POPular! Too cute! I love his hair and outfit. Though I don’t think Champ POPular’s “too popular to hate.” If anything he might annoy people due to his popularity

I thought he was gonna pull out yo-yos as his “finishing touch” and I was sad when it was lollipops even though that makes more sense. BRING BACK THE YO-YOS!

“Do all the fighting and make sure he doesn’t die.” That is a valid concern

WE WILL WE WILL ROCK YOU! I’D KNOW IT ANYWHERE

Huey taking notes is adorable

“Just in time for the tag-team round.” “Wait, they’re playing tag now?! MAN!” I love how Danny says MAN

How does Huey not know what a tag-team is? It’s a pretty common term

I love Launchpad’s reading face

Dewey has red, blue, and green lollipops. Cute

“HE’S THROWING LOLLIPOPS BECAUSE HE THINKS WE’RE SUCKERS!” That took me off guard and I laughed so hard

“I’ve known you my whole life, I kinda knew how this would play out.” Louie is genre savvy. Perhaps too savvy. He’s gonna figure out he’s in a tv show

“More like Champ POP..ulation zero because he has no friends...in Friendtown.” I fail to see how that was any worse than LP’s “more like Champ UN-POPular.”

“WE HATE YOU NOW!” Tough crowd

Huey’s face after that. I just want to pinch his lil cheeks

WEBBY DON’T NEED NO WRESTLER NAME

It TOTALLY went over my head that they censored Hela with Hecka (at least they used her better than the MCU did. WE COULD HAVE HAD SO MUCH BETTER)

I would let her pin me to the mat and crush my skull in

“Oh, COME ON, THIS is what you like?! A creepy goth and her pet dog!” SHUT UP, DEWEY, THAT IS EXACTLY WHAT I WANT! I’m surprised Webby didn’t slap him for the “creepy goth” comment seeing as Lena is goth and misunderstood

“HECKA YEAH! HECKA YEAH!” SHE’S SO COOL AND SEXY AND SHE HAS A DOG

Poor Huey, he’s doing his best. Hope he takes a shower later because he got pretty sweaty

HECKA COULD STEP ON ME AND I’D SAY THANK YOU

Why did Huey have all those corn puns?

“YOU’RE THE WORST! YOU’RE THE WORST!” It’s just not Huey’s day

“You don’t have to try to make it sound great, it already is.” Did this remind anyone else of Dewey’s “don’t overthink it” advice to Launchpad from Double-O Duck? He’s doing his best to help Huey

I WANT HECKA TO DESTROY ME

“EMBRACE THE BOOZE BOOS.”

Poor Dewey

WEBBY IS A BEAST! SHE WAS BORN FOR THIS!

“EMBRACE YOUR INNER HEEL!” Cuz being a heel is fun!

DUDE, WEBBY TOOK DOWN THE GODDESS OF DEATH WITH NOTHING BUT HER LEGS AND THIGHS! WE STAN!

I like that Fenny has knee pads on

“AW, YOU’RE SO DANGEROUS AND CUTE! I JUST WANT TO PET YOUR LITTLE BELLY!” WEBBY IS ME

“A classic ‘who’s a good boy?’ gambit!” AND I’D FALL FOR IT TOO! SUCH A GOOD BOI

“Wait, am I the Launchpad here?” Bitch, you WISH

“YOU CAN’T GIVE CANDY TO A DOG!” This is why you don’t have a pet, Dewey

“WHOA, back from THE DEAD for the QUEEN of the DEAD!”

Kind of a dick move, Louie

AIR GUITAR!

Jormungandr looks like a Masters of the Universe knock-off toy

WHO’S A GOOD BOI? YOU ARE!

“With a toxic personality” I think you’re projecting a bit, Jormungandr 

How does Huey not know what a battle royale is? That is a very common term! Hell, there is a well known book and movie with that title!

“I’m just a humble, noble snake man of the people.” Why does the term snake man make me laugh so much?  

WOY REFERENCE FTW

Dewey needs a hug! And some therapy would probably be a good idea

Scrooge’s speech started on a good note then went downhill FAST

“And lastly, I’ll use the dust of your bones as sweetener in my tea.” DAMN

“TOO FAR!” I DON’T THINK IT’S FAR ENOUGH! TELL HIM HOW YOU WILL BATHE IN HIS BLOOD

FUCK YEAH BEAKLEY!

SHE GAVE HIM THE CHAIR! I think this CONFIRMS Beakley as a wrestling fan

“I know we’re supposed to take over for Scrooge one day, but do you ever wonder if maybe we’re not cut out for it?” YOU SHOULDN’T HAVE TO WONDER THOSE THINGS AT ALL! 

Louie’s like WE DON’T HAVE TIME FOR THIS SHIT!

“Be LP” My new mantra

Aw, Louie sees Dewey as a hero. Like how LP saw Drake as a hero. I think @drakepad is onto something, this scene and the fight scene seem WAAAAY too much like Drake’s intro to be just a coincidence

I keep saying this, but Louie should consider a career in motivational speaking. He knows what people need to hear

“Let’s do this!” “I don’t know.” “Let’s Dewey this?” “I’m in.”

“I’LL SHED YOUR SKIN FOR YOU!” If he hadn’t of had an old man back moment that would have been a BRUTAL CUT

OMG WAS LAUNCHPAD WEARING THAT THE WHOLE TIME? You see his clothes fly off when he jumps in the ring

“Whoa. In a COMPLETELY UNEXPECTED TWIST, the announcer was Captain Crash THIS WHOLE TIME!” LP does underground wrestling matches in his spare time, TELL ME I’M WRONG

“YOUR CATCHPHRASES ARE FORCED!” I agree, Dewey could have done WAY BETTER

I like Louie just GLARING at the dude who insulted Dewey’s catchphrase

LP looks so proud of Huey

“I don’t care at all, why should I?” Methinks the snake man doth protest too much

I like how Jormungandr’s pupils are thinner during the climax. It shows off his true nature

Dewey should have been the one to do a spin attack, ya know, cuz he’s Sonic? I’ll go now

“The Pop never Stops.” That was better

WHERE ARE ALL THESE CHAIRS COMING FROM?!

I LEGIT thought Strongbeard was gonna throw Dewey his axe and I was like Dewey wouldn’t be able to lift that

SUPER SAIYAN DEWEY! Also was that a TIGER SNARL?

I like the ice pack on Launchpad’s head. Just because he can take a lot of damage doesn’t mean that LP is immune to pain

I like that the crowd CHANGED THEIR BANNERS! Nice

LOUIE AND WEBBY LOOKED SO CUTE!

LP tearing up

“A true people’s hero” I feel like that phrase will come back in relation to other characters (cough DW cough)

Scrooge is such a little shit, it’s kind of adorable

THAT END SHOT! THAT SONG!

This was a SUPER FUN EPISODE! I couldn’t really tell where they were going and I LOVED EVERY SECOND OF IT! I wish we had gotten Huey in some wrestling gear but maybe next time. I like the message that doing the right thing isn’t always popular but I kind of feel like Dewey getting the crowd on his side muddled the message somewhat. Poor Dewey needs therapy or something so he doesn’t feel like he needs CONSTANT approval. Again, he’s 11 YEARS OLD and shouldn’t be put into such a serious position. LP was VIP this episode. I’m bummed we’re on hiatus again, but WHAT an episode to end on!

[randomfandomfamily]

So, people apparently try to use Dewey as a sacrifice. A lot. I’m sure that turns out fine.

Most of the time.

Tagging @sophfandoms53, because darling you are my inspiration, and @3kkh0, because you asked me very nicely not to fuck up the adorable danger dumbass.

Being tied up wasn’t an ideal situation. By far Dewey’s least favorite part of adventuring with his family, and it happened more often than he’d like. If he was tied up, he couldn’t run around and search for booby traps or bust a move whenever the team was in need of a victory dance.

It’s not that being tied up made him feel helpless or anything. He just liked being able to move. If he was tied up then he couldn’t move, and moving was required for running. Escaping. He really needed to be escaping right about now.

This wasn’t getting him anywhere. He forced himself to take a breath and clear his head. Everyone else would be here soon and voila! Rescue for Dewford Duck!

… again.

He made another attempt at wriggling out of the ropes, but to no avail. Sometimes it worked, particularly newer religions who hadn’t had much experience, but this was an ancient tribe. Needless to say, they were pretty good at tying knots.

Giving up on trying to get out of the ropes, he stood up and started looking for a way out of the… pit… cage? It was a hole in the ground with a bunch of branches woven together to keep him in. He wasn’t sure why they bothered with the branch thing. After a few failed attempts it became pretty obvious that he wasn’t going to be able to climb out.

“Ugh,” Dewey groaned as he leaned against the dirt wall. “What do these guys even want?”

Huey and Uncle Scrooge weren’t there to answer his question, so he tried to remember what they had said in the plane on the way there. It was a tribe–a really old one–that believed in some all-powerful god. Classic ancient tribe stuff.

Whether or not the god was real was up for debate. Dewey had met a couple of gods before, so it wasn’t impossible. But the only reason this tribe believed in this stupid god was because they managed to get their hands on some magic spear a really long time ago.

According to Uncle Scrooge, this thing couldn’t miss. No matter how you threw the spear, it would nail the target every time. So now they were looking for the spear because… adventure. Also, super cool weapon.

Huey and Webby had talked the whole way there about rituals of the tribe and how their hierarchy worked, but Dewey hadn’t been paying attention. He heard god and spear and pretty much checked out of the conversation.

He was mostly just excited about the adventure part of the whole ordeal.

A rustling made him glance back up. A pair of painted masks removed the woven branches and stared down at him.

Considerably less excited at this point.

“So!” Dewey said nonchalantly. “Do I get to leave the hole, or-” He was interrupted by one of the tribe members grabbing him by the ropes secured around his torso. “Hey! Ow! Easy with the merchandise, guys.”

Well, at least he was out of the hole now. The sun was dangerously close to completely disappearing behind the horizon, and torches were being lit up around the tribe’s village.

He still wasn’t worried, though. Even if it was getting kinda dark. It would be harder to locate the tribe, sure, but come on. This was his family, all experienced adventurers. They’d still be able to find him, easy.

“You know you’re in big trouble as soon as my family shows up, right?” Dewey asked. He was ignored and led towards the middle of the tribe’s village. “My friend Webby could take you guys, no problem. And my Uncle Donald? Oh hoooo, buddy, he’ll tear this place apart.”

More tribe members started emerging from the primitive huts. There were a lot more of them than he thought. But it would be nothing for his family of adventurers. Plus! Launchpad had even joined them for this one, so they were even more prepared.

He glanced around for any sign of his family. Nothing so far, but that wasn’t so unusual. The point of rescue varied from adventure to adventure. Some days busting him out of the cage, other times a dramatic save from the altar.

Personally, he wasn’t a fan of that second option. Not that he didn’t trust his family to save him, it was just a little more nerve-wracking. Not scary, of course. He wasn’t scared of these people and their magic spear. He was Dewey Duck. He wasn’t afraid of anything.

Dewey spotted a small group of tribe members with drums.”Oh! You guys have music set up for the occasion? You really know how to have a good time.” One burly tribesman glared down at him. Dewey brushed off how uneasy he felt. “What kind of sacrifice is this, anyway? No, wait, let me guess. You’re going to… stab me with the magic spear?”

They didn’t answer, but a chant had started to rise, low voices muttering nonsense. Dewey hated the chanting. It was so unsettling.

Too unsettling. Time to distract himself. “You know, stabbing has got to be my favorite kind of sacrifice. Simple, yet effective. Less is more, know what I’m saying?”

He was bad at this. It was easy to talk to people that liked him, but it was hard to talk himself out of trouble. That’s what Louie was good at. Louie knew how people acted, what to say get people on his side, or at least get them to not kill him.

But Dewey didn’t understand people like that. He didn’t know what to say, and he didn’t have the skills to get himself out of the situation like Webby. And he certainly didn’t have Huey’s resourcefulness, either.

Maybe that’s why he was getting taken all the time. It was just so glaringly obvious that he’d be the easiest target.

Dewey clenched his fists at his sides. Not now. He could re-evaluate his worth later. After he was back at the mansion. And tomorrow he could pretend he got a full night’s sleep, when he actually just spent hours staring out his window and counting stars.

He spotted the spear. Some guy with a big leafy-looking crown was holding it. Definitely the leader, but not the sacrifice guy. Huey called them priests, Louie called them cultists, but Dewey didn’t really care what they were called, he just wished they’d stop trying to use him in sacrifices.

Though, he supposed it was better him than some other rando they found in the woods. He had people that would look for him. And find him. Hopefully soon.

“Okay, so the big guy over there has the spear,” Dewey said. He was trying to stall, but it wasn’t really working. “But he’s kinda standing all the way over there with the spear, so how’s this sacrifice going to…” He watched the guy in the crown pass the spear over to a guy in an ornate cape. Also made of leaves, somehow. “Never mind. I guess that’s how it’s going to work.”

There wasn’t a traditional altar, just a simple wooden post in the middle of the platform. It made sense, actually. Most sacrifices were done with a knife, but with a spear? That wouldn’t really work laying down.

Dewey shook his head to clear his thoughts. Now wasn’t the time to be complimenting the tribe on their practical methods of sacrifice, he needed to think. He’d run this course so many times, way more times than he should have, he should be able to think this through.

First thing, getting untied. The light from the torches caught something on the ground in front of him. Discarded spearhead. It was either from someone’s broken weapon or one that just never got attached to anything, but whatever the case, it was good news for him.

All he had to do was grab it. Feigning the trip was easy enough for an actor as brilliant as he was, but he nearly missed the narrow window of opportunity to snatch the spearhead off the ground before the two tribespeople leading him towards his doom quickly yanked him back to his feet.

“Sorry guys,” Dewey said easily, holding the sharp stone tightly in his hand. “Lost my balance for a sec there.” The stone was digging into his hand, but he couldn’t afford to loosen his grip in case someone saw it.

He scanned the trees while painted masks started securing him to there post. Where was everybody? They were usually here by now. It was starting to look like he was gonna have to get out of this one himself. Which was fine, obviously, he’d done that before.

There was a moment of panic when they were tying his hands behind him that he thought someone saw the stone. To his relief, they backed off the platform without giving him a second glance. As soon as they left to join the rest of the chanters, he set to work trying to get the ropes off.

It always looked easier in the movies. The movies didn’t show how bad the rope chafed your skin when you worked the stone back and forth. And they didn’t show how much the rock slipped because you can’t see what you’re doing, either.

The chanting was starting to get louder. This was bad. Not bad enough for him to start panicking, because he never ever panicked, but it was still kinda bad.

“You guys are seriously gonna regret this,” Dewey warned. “My family is out looking for me. They’re about to find me, I guarantee it.” His gaze darted to the treeline. Still no sign of anyone.

If it was just Uncle Scrooge, Webby, and his brothers like it used to be, he’d assume they were trying to ambush the tribe. But Uncle Donald, his mother, and Launchpad were on this mission. And no offense to any of them, he loved them dearly, but stealth wasn’t their strong suit.

So if he couldn’t hear Uncle Donald yelling or Launchpad crashing through the trees, that meant they weren’t here. And if they weren’t here…

Bad. This was actually bad. He tried to think of something to say, literally anything, but the words weren’t coming out any more. The only thing he could do was reassure himself that his family was going to be there soon. They always were.

Unless they weren’t.

The priest-cult-whatever-he-was held up the spear. Under normal circumstances, Dewey could count on the darkening sky and flickering firelight to obscure their vision enough to maybe miss. But this was a spear that couldn’t miss.

Baaaaaaaaad. Bad bad bad. Really bad.

The arm holding the spear pulled back to throw just as Dewey heard the ropes finally snap. He shook his hands free and ducked just as the spear flew over his head.

He couldn’t hear much over his own heartbeat pounding in his ears, but he was pretty sure the chanting was turning into angry shouting. And if they were gonna be angry anyway, then he might as well take their special spear while he made his escape, right?

The seconds it took to pull the magic spear out of the post cost him, but he was sure Uncle Scrooge would be happy he managed to grab it. The normal spear that grazed his left arm wasn’t a big deal. Angry people with spears were all part of adventuring and definitely manageable.

There wasn’t much left to do but run. “So long, crazy sacrifice people!” He called as he jumped off the platform. “I’m off to- whoa!” He realized his mistake the instant he hit the ground. The spear wasn’t going to let up until it hit the target, and it hadn’t hit him yet.

Why didn’t he leave it in the stupid post?

It was a struggle to run and stop the spear he was holding from impaling him. He wasn’t sure how to make it stop, but stumbling earned him another spear that he didn’t quite dodge in time. He was only vaguely aware that his right shoulder was hit, but he was sure he’d feel the sting as soon as the adrenaline wore off, which wouldn’t be any time soon considering he was getting chased.

“Stop. Stop it.” He hid behind a tree and pushed the spear away from himself. “Ah, if Webby were here, she’d know how to fix this.” Taking the spear with both hands, he forced the tip of the spear to face the ground. “Alright, think.

“You’re Dewey Duck, the world’s greatest eleven year old adventurer. You can figure this out.” The sound angry shouts grew closer at an alarming rate. “Okay, I can figure this out in a minute.” He took off running again, trying to make as little noise as possible.

Talking was usually how he coped with stress. He’d pretty much been talking since he got separated from his family. That probably wasn’t a good idea at the moment, but he couldn’t help muttering to himself anyway. It was hardly a whisper, really, but it kept his fear to reasonable levels.

“Fear?” He muttered as he shoved aside the underbrush in his way. “Since when do I deal with fear? I don’t do fear. I am not afraid.” The light from a torch barely registered before the painted face appeared. Dewey scrambled to back up and keep running. “Not that way!”

Still not afraid. Absolutely not afraid. Would his Uncle Scrooge be afraid? No way! So he just had to concentrate on not getting stabbed by this stupid magic spear.

Though, in hindsight, maybe he should’ve concentrated on running, too. It didn’t occur to him that running blindly through the woods in the dark wasn’t a good idea until he was already rolling down the hill.

Good news, he covered a lot of ground with how quickly he descended the slope. Bad news, there were a lot more things hurting now. He was pretty sure his back had hit a rock on the way down, which very effectively knocked the wind out of him. Not to mention he was about seventy-six percent sure his leg was gonna have a nasty bruise and-

He was forgetting something.

His blurry vision cleared up just in time to see the spear he dropped speeding towards him from above. He rolled to his left to dodge it. And, thanks to his incredible adventuring skills, he did dodge it. Mostly. He mostly dodged it. And mostly dodging it was totally fine. If you got mostly correct answers on a test, you still got a good grade.

Bright side. He needed a bright side to this.

“Come on, get up,” Dewey scolded himself. “Spear hit me in the side, and that’s not great. Bright side. It’s not stuck in my side, it’s stuck in the ground.” He used the spear to stand himself back up. “And bonus, if it hit me, then its job is done. Which means I can safely carry it back to… um…”

Where was he again? He was pretty sure he was headed back in the right direction when he first started running, but now…

“Great,” Dewey said bitterly. “Okay, wait, this is still fine. Everyone’s probably out looking for me still. I’m bound to run into someone eventually. I just have to keep walking.” Distant shouts made him shudder. “Never mind. I’m running.”

He took about two steps and nearly fell again. He had to plant the spear in the ground to keep himself from falling over. “Never mind again. Running is not happening.” Walking was still a pain, but considerably easier than full-on running.

If Huey were here he’d probably say something smart. Like how Dewey should probably take a piece of cloth to try and stop the bleeding in his side.

Fortunately, his shirt was already ripped from the spear. He paused to take off his short-sleeved overshirt and tore it up so that it could tie around his torso. It probably wasn’t the best patch job, but it’d work until he found the others.

Unfortunately, his family was a little harder to find than he thought they’d be. He considered shouting to see if anyone could hear him, but given the tribe of people he had robbed of a sacrifice and a magic spear, yelling seemed like a bad idea.

Not that they wouldn’t catch up to him eventually anyway. His progress was getting slower by the second. They’d figure out where he was sooner or later and-

That was a torch.

Dewey nearly tripped for what seemed like the hundredth time and stood behind the truck of a tree. He rubbed at his eyes furiously, trying to force back the tears that sprang into his eyes after he tripped. Much like everything else that was happening to him right now, crying would be bad.

The light swung in his direction. If Dewey were allowed to curse, he would have. Because really, how stupid did you have to be to trip while you were being chased? This was, like, the bajillionth time.

Probably the last time too.

A very irrational part of his brain forced him to close his eyes, like the light would disappear if he couldn’t see it. The logic was every bit as sound as hiding under his covers, convinced that the hoodie Louie left on the chair was a monster, but logic wasn’t exactly his area of expertise.

He could hear someone walking close by. If his mother and Uncle Donald were here, they would tell him to be brave or something. That was usually so easy for him. So why did it feel like his throat was starting to close up?

Dewey slid down the truck of the tree and sat on the ground. He was scared. It felt ridiculous and stupid, but his side hurt and it was dark and he couldn’t find his family and he was scared.

The sound of footsteps were closer now. Like, really close. Way too close. Dewey tightened his grip on the spear. Usually he would love an excuse to wield a magic weapon, but not tonight.

The tears he had been trying so desperately to hold back started to slip out. He couldn’t stop them even if he wanted to.

He could hear whoever was holding the torch just on the other side of the tree. Clamping a hand over his mouth to stop any noise from coming out, Dewey waited for the footsteps to pass.

By some miracle, they actually did pass. They walked right by him. Dewey was sure they’d hear his heartbeat, and he nearly collapsed in relief when the footsteps receded, but he forced himself to stand up.

And then he ran. He didn’t care if his side hurt or not, he wanted to find his family. He wanted to give Uncle Scrooge this stupid spear and never look at it ever again.

A low rumbling caught his attention. “The plane,” Dewey said breathlessly. He changed directions and ran towards the sound. Normally he’d try for a grand entrance, but he was way too relieved to care.

Now, Launchpad had been told to stay with the plane while the others looked for Dewey. He hadn’t expected to be the one that saw Dewey first. But the duck that stumbled into view was undoubtedly his best friend and boy was it good to see him.

“Dewey!” Launchpad jumped up and waved enthusiastically. “There you are! I haven’t seen you in forever!” He frowned as he noticed Dewey looked a little less-than-fantastic. “You don’t look so good.”

The younger duck laughed weakly. “Trust me, I’m doing much better now.” He was using a spear as a walking stick. When did Dewey get a spear? Launchpad didn’t remember him having a spear before. “Where is everyone else?”

“Looking for you,” Launchpad answered. “And a magic spear that never misses. I’m here with the plane in case we have to make a quick… getaway.” He smiled brightly. “Oh hey! You’ve got the magic spear! Awesome! Mr. McD will- oh geez.” Launchpad reached out and steadied Dewey, who was right on the verge of falling over. “You really don’t look so good.”

Dewey clung to the sleeve of Launchpad’s jacket with his free hand. “I’m fine,” he whispered in a quivering voice, “I just wanna go home.”

Launchpad immediately scooped him up. It wasn’t very hard, Dewey was light and very small. It still made him uneasy to feel Dewey curl into him like he was scared to look anywhere. He relaxed a slight bit once they were in the plane, but not much.

Deciding the spear wasn’t important at the moment, Launchpad took it and tossed it somewhere. Mr. McD would probably take care of it whenever he got back. “Wait,” Dewey protested, “The spear-”

“I don’t think you need a spear,” Launchpad put Dewey down in the pilot’s seat, “I think you need to sit there for a minute.”

Launchpad could admit that he wasn’t very good at adventuring. Crashing? Yes. Piloting? Debatable. But one thing he did know how to do was use a first aid kit. When you ran into things as much as he did, you learned to patch yourself up.

Dewey cleared his throat when he saw Launchpad pull out the red box. “Launchpad, you really don’t have to-”

“I think I kinda do actually.” Launchpad sat in the co-pilot’s seat and opened the first aid kit. “What happened out there anyway? You look like you got hit by… something.”

“Oh, you know, just normal adventure stuff.” Dewey held out his left arm when Launchpad motioned for it. “Crazy people in the woods wanted a sacrifice and I was the easiest target.”

Launchpad hummed thoughtfully while he worked. “Did you escape on your own?”

“Yeah, nobody had found me yet.” Dewey shrugged. “Que the chase scene, blah blah blah, I feel down a hill and now I’m here.”

“How’d you get the spear if they were all chasing you?”

Dewey hesitated. “They may have… you know, thrown it. At me.”

Launchpad laughed as he finished bandaging Dewey’s arm. “Wow! And Mr. McD said that the spear never missed. Lucky you, huh?”

“It didn’t miss, Launchpad.” Dewey lifted the hem of his long-sleeved shirt. “Huey would probably have a heart attack if he saw this, but it was dark and I don’t really know how-” He winced as he untied the blue cloth around his torso. “Anyway, they threw the spear at me but I ducked and it ended up sticking in a wooden post.

“And I probably should’ve left it there,” Dewey said as he let the shredded remnants of his shirt fall to the floor. “But I wasn’t really thinking, so I pulled it out. I fell down a hill and uh… well, the spear never misses, right?”

Launchpad rummaged through the first aid kit. “I don’t think Huey’s the only one who’s going to have a heart attack.”

Dewey sighed. “Yeah, I know.”

“I mean, you should have seen your mom. She’s never seen one of you guys be used as a sacrifice before.” Launchpad shook his head. “I bet she’s still freaking out. And Donald too. And Mr. McD and Webby and your brothers and…” He noticed Dewey’s eyes starting to water. “This is… not helping, is it?”

“Reminding me that everyone was worried because I’m useless and can’t take care of myself?” Dewey snapped. “Yeah, no, not helping.” He groaned and rubbed his hands over his face. “I-I’m sorry, Launchpad, I didn’t mean to get mad.”

“S’okay,” Launchpad said as he bandaged Dewey’s side. “And I don’t think y-” He was interrupted by a pained shout. “Are you-”

Dewey waved him off. “Fine,” he said through gritted teeth. “I’m fine, it… it just hurts.”

“Almost done,” Launchpad promised. Nothing was deep enough to need stitches, thankfully. He wasn’t sure he could do that. Still, it was pretty bad. “As I was saying: I don’t think you’re useless.”

Dewey tentatively touched the bandages over his injured side. “You’re only saying that because you’re my best friend.”

“No, I’m saying it because it’s true.” Launchpad swatted Dewey’s hand away from the new bandage. “And nobody else thinks it either.”

“Launchpad, you can’t know what other people think.”

He shrugged and set to work on Dewey’s shoulder. “That may be true, but that doesn’t mean I’m not right.”

Dewey’s brow furrowed. “I don’t get it.”

“And now we’re even.” Launchpad closed up the first aid kit and stood to put it back.

“That isn’t how it works,” Dewey said.

“Why not?” Launchpad asked as he tucked the small box away. “You’re always doing the brave stuff. Bein’ all cool and dangerous. That’s important for adventuring.”

Dewey rolled his eyes. “Everyone does the dangerous stuff. Even Uncle Donald!” He leaned back in the pilot’s seat. “I’m just doing it dumber, and I get into more trouble than I should. I’m not as smart as Huey, Louie, and Webby.”

Launchpad sat back down. “That’s not-”

“Don’t say it’s not true,” Dewey interrupted. “Look at me!” He threw out his arms angrily. “Does this look like a smart adventurer to you?”

“What? Just because you got hurt?” Launchpad asked. “You think Mr. McD got out of every adventure without a scratch? That guy’s almost died more times than I can count, and I haven’t even been working with him for that long.”

Dewey let his arms fall. “I hear what you’re saying, but it… I just-” He sighed and buried his face in his hands. “I still feel like crap.”

“I think it’s okay to feel like crap sometimes,” Launchpad said. “If it makes you feel any better, you just brought back a spear that Mr. McD has been trying to track down for years. I’m only here because he thought he might need the extra muscle, but you did it all by yourself.”

“I mean…” Dewey peered between his hands at the spear Launchpad had tossed aside. “I… yeah. I did do that.” The barest trace of a smile appeared. “Guess that was pretty cool, huh?”

“Definitely cool,” Launchpad agreed. “And you can tell your brothers how cool you are when they get back.”

Dewey nodded slowly. “That is kind of my thing, isn’t it? Being all cool and dangerous and stuff.” He looked up at Launchpad. “Thanks.”

Launchpad reached over and ruffled Dewey’s hair. “That’s what friends are for. Friends are also for hugs. Do you want a hug?” Dewey nodded, and Launchpad scooped him up for the second time that day.

He wasn’t sure how long they sat there, but it was long enough for Dewey to finally–finally–stop trembling like a leaf in a storm. Even then, neither party seemed keen on letting go.

It wasn’t until after Dewey had fallen asleep that Launchpad remembered that the radio in the plane was connected to the walkie-talkies everyone else was carrying. He wished he had remembered it sooner, but better late than never.

“Launchpad to uh… everyone. Can you guys hear me?”

“Aye, we can hear ye. What’re you doin’ on th’ line?”

“Hi Launchpad!”

“Loud and clear on our end.”

“Dewey made it back to the plane,” he told them. “And he got the spear, too.”

“Wait, really?”

“Uncle Donald, Launchpad found Dewey!”

“Uuuugh, we did all this work for nothing.”

“We’re on our way back, lad. Don’t let that nephew of mine go runnin’ off again.”

Launchpad glanced down at Dewey. “Well, he’s actually asleep, so I don’t think that will be a problem.”

“Asleep? Why is he asleep?”

“Long day,” Launchpad said. “I’ll explain once everyone gets back.”

[roguepaladin]

Shallura prompt? Rock concert!!!

Congradulations you have just recieved a 2300+ word essay! 

This was fun to write, is it romancey enough? I don’t know, but it was fun!

_

It was freezing!

On this late winter evening, where temperatures dipped below zero and the winds picked up; Allura found herself standing out in the bitter cold, holding on to last bit of warmth her body had left to give. You had to be crazy to be out here, but crazy she had been when agreed to accompany her cousin Romelle to a concert.

Romelle’s favourite rock band ‘Voltron’ was in town and she practically begged Allura to go with her. It wasn’t everyday a famous band came to their city of Altea. Romelle called it her one and only chance to every see them in the flesh, and Allura had to be there to catch her when she fainted.

‘What kind of name is Voltron?’

‘It’s their concept!’ Romelle explained.

‘They use their combined powers as musicians to form the new sound of futurist rock electro! - Allura, stop making that face, you have to come! Please please please!’

So, she eventually agreed, though it took her some time to understand the whole ‘mystical space lions taught them the way’ mythology… and to stop laughing. Now, she was slowly regretting everything!

Romelle made they arrive early in order to get the best spots in the standing area. A plan that had them standing out in the cold for nearly 4 hours. Please be worth it she begged. Granted she didn’t have to pay for the ticket as part of the deal. She looked at her cousin, even in this cold, Romelle never lost a bit of excitement, and she chatted away animatedly. Apparently, her favourite member was the drummer named Hunk and she even wore his colour; a yellow t-shirt and a matching signature headband. Allura looked around noticed many others in line also wearing yellow, some green, but most were dressed in blue, red or black. The reds and blues didn’t seem to like each other. Romelle said it was about a dumb rivalry between the lead singer and the guitarist.

After assessing all the colours, Allura started to feel out of place in her pink puffer jacket. Not that everyone was dressed in team colours, and she also felt they were just like her; here against their will.

When doors finally opened, Allura was dragged by her cousin up to the very front of stage. As close as they could get that was not actually standing on stage. Romelle pulled out her homemade posters and handed one to Allura. On Allura’s poster in bright yellow letters was ‘Feeling unsupported?’, which she supposed made sense with Romelle’s ‘I could be your other leg’.

The house lights went down and the avenue filled with screams as the band took to the stage. A large screen began to play a video, that made them scream more as it introduced the band members over the sound of deafening rock music. When the stage lights came on, Allura didn’t think it was possible for the crowd to scream louder but they quickly proved her wrong.

‘FORM VOLTRON!’

The leader singer screamed in the microphone and the crowd chanted back

‘DEFEND THE UNIVERSE!’

The band immediately started playing their first song, it was now Allura got a proper look at the band. The each wore their signature colour so she knew immediately recognised Hunk at the drums. According to the intro video; D-Jing at the launchpad was the group’s only female member Pidge. Next strumming away at the electric guitar was Keith. Standing next to Keith was the Leader Singer, Lance who seemed to be trying his best to sing a note over the sound of the guitar. The final member, dressed in all black except for his silver dyed bangs was Shiro, jamming away at the bass. Allura felt herself staring at him for most of the set. While the others were high energy, he had a calmness in his manner. He even struck her more when he took over for Lance and sang the bridge, which made half the crowd go wild. His voice was strong and steady and didn’t feel out of place in the lull of electronic beats. Romelle looked over to her cousin-

‘Ah-ha!’ she smirked.

‘What?’

‘I see you’ve decided to join team black, don’t worry, everyone falls for Shiro first’

Allura blushed, ‘I- I’m not falling for anyone’

Romelle laughed.

‘Its nothing to be ashamed of, Shiro is the leader of the group for a reason, he writes all the songs too’

Allura ignored her cousin’s smug face. Though she had to admit he did stand out the most for someone not wearing a colour.

She on the other hand, stood out very clearly dressed in bright pink and standing in front within the ocean of hardcore fans.

At the end of the song, the band took time to introduce themselves. Lance talked the most but he also seemed to have the most fans and he looked very proud of that. Allura was sure Romelle screamed out her left lung when Hunk said a small hello and waved his drumsticks. Keith just waved, and a fan at the back screamed out marriage proposal. Pidge hyped up the crowd with a few beats. When it was Shiro’s turn to talk, Allura felt herself become nervous. She didn’t know why but she felt like his eyes had glanced a bit longer on her than others. The crowd went wild as he smiled over his microphone. He then simply thanked everyone for coming to show, thanked the venue and introduced the next song.

Over the course of the next five songs, Allura wondered if she imagined him staring. His eyes would look up quickly in her direction and quickly down. Perhaps Romelle was right and she had developed some cliché crush on a rock star, because there was no way she could catch the eye of someone famous that easily. This wasn’t a movie where the next moment he would jump over the stage and proclaim her to be the most beautiful thing in the world. However, she was losing count of how many times he stole a glance at her.

‘Maybe he was staring because I’m staring’ She thought, and she blushed at how creepy she must be right now. So, she decided to turned at look at Romelle, who now had long tears down her face because Hunk wouldn’t stare her way. Judging from the way he played those drums, Allura highly doubted he could afford to look away for fear of messing up. She comforted her cousin and tried to help her enjoy the rest of the show.

Allura kept fighting her strong urge to look back over at the bassist, so she decided to close her eyes and dance instead. She had to admit that they sounded very good, not something she would listen to everyday but they played well and the crowd had a good energy. So, she danced, and pulled her cousin into a dance. It was there in the midst of her swaying she caught those eyes, and this time she was 100% sure he was staring this time. Her head moved side to side so he was none the wiser that her eyes were locked on him. He even seemed to be enjoying her watching her dance. Suddenly self-conscious of her dorky moves, she mis-stepped and tripped over the person behind her. Allura watched as his expression change to shock and fall out of view as she slammed onto her back. She was completely mortified! Over the sound of music, she could hear Romelle call out to her, as she tried to pick herself. It was in this process she was interrupted by a sharp pain to the side of her head which threw her back onto the floor, effectively knocking her out.

—

When Allura came to, she was lying on a sofa in what seemed to be the backstage area of the venue. As indicated by the vibrations and muffled sounds of music coming off the walls. She moved to sit up, and could feel her sides and head ache in protest.

‘Don’t get up too fast’ came the voice of woman, it was steady and monotone.

Allura looked over and noticed a tall older woman sitting across from her.

‘Where am I?’

‘Green room. I don’t know what you did to knock yourself out but you were lucky to not be trampled on’

It was then Romelle entered the room, signalled by her delighted squeal at seeing Allura awake. The other woman in the room made a face like her ears were ringing.

‘Are you okay?’ her cousin questioned, examining her up and down.

‘I’m fine, it only hurts a little’

‘That’s a relief! You caused quite a scene!’

Allura felt her face grow hot, ‘W-What…What do mean caused a scene?’

The tall woman got up from her chair and walked over to the pair.

‘For starters, we had to stop the show until we could remove you safely’ she stated as if telling her charges for arrest.

NO! Allura grimaced, they had to be joking, how embarrassing!

Romelle however was smiling at her.

‘Don’t be embarrassed, everyone is SUPER jealous of you right now’

Romelle then described the events after she blacked out. Shiro having seen her get kicked in the head, had stopped the performance immediately and ordered everyone to get out of the way.

‘and guess what!’ Romelle squealed-

Allura had no time to response before Romelle continued on detailing how Shiro, escorted by a few security guards, carried her backstage!  

‘-and I explained to Krolia, that you were my cousin so she let me in’  

Allura looked over at Krolia who seemed to regret that decision as Romelle couldn’t seem to keep from squealing excitedly about everything.  Allura wanted to sink into the floor, what if he thought she made a scene on purpose. She wanted to go home, but her head really hurt and Krolia refused to let her off the sofa. There she was forced to stay another 20 minutes until-

‘THANK YOU, GOOD NIGHT!!!’

The sound of the crowd roaring was heard from the other side of the wall. They had missed the rest of the concert. Not that Romelle seemed to mind, her cousin’s misfortune was working in her favour. She was back stage! Hunk’s jacket was on that chair, if only she could just reach out and touch it! Oh, why won’t Krolia just leave the room and stop watching her like a hawk!

Allura’s heart began to race as she heard the voices of the bandmates come closer to the door.

As the door opened, the sounds of the crowd screaming for an encore filled the room, but none of that seem to register to Allura’s ears as Shiro strode across the room towards her.

‘You’re awake! How are you feeling?’ and he had a genuine concern in his eyes.

Allura couldn’t seemed to find her voice. So Krolia answered for her and drew his attention away to band matters as Allura’s now understood her to be their manager. The other members came to ask her the same questions and here Romelle did the talking with a slight bias in answering mostly Hunk’s questions. Lance and Pidge were polite, lance more so and Keith seem to be just as mute as she was. The attention was overwhelming as thoughts battled to stay present while imagining all the ways she was possibly carried by Shiro. She blushed as she thought of him carrying her ‘princess’ style.

‘Let’s go home…’ she finally managed to say. Which was not something anyone expected a fan to say in this situation. She however was not a fan, and wanted to get far away from those piercing eyes as soon as possible.

Allura pushed herself off the sofa and grabbed her cousin’s hand.

‘Thank you and I’m really sorry I made you have to stop your show, and from what I remember I did enjoy it, so please don’t think it was done on purpose’ and with that she turned and left.

Reluctantly Romelle left the room behind her cousin knowing her excuse to be in that room just went up in flames.

‘Stay here, I’ll go get our bags and coats’ she sulked off and left Allura to stand in backstage area.

The door to the green room opened, which Allura didn’t notice until the person who came out was standing next her.

‘Allura?’

She jumped, and turned to looked at Shiro.

‘I’m sorry, that is your name, right?’

She slowly nodded and he looked relieved.

‘Don’t apologise, I know I’m the reason you fell and got hurt tonight’

‘What…what do you mean?’

‘Well, I was kind of staring at you down- I MEAN! not you…I was staring at your SIGN and then eventually…you’ he seemed nervous to admit that last part.

‘My sign…?’

‘Yeah, ‘Feeling unsupported’?’

‘Oh, well that wasn’t really mine, it was my cousins’’

Shiro now look extremely embarrassed, brushing his hand against his neck nervously.

‘That-Actually makes more sense…it was yellow after all…’ he mumbled.

It was now Allura noticed the hand on his neck and connecting arm was an artificial and extremely well made prosthetic. Did he think she was making a jab at his disability? She wouldn’t- She didn’t know!

‘Anyways! I’m sorry…for that, I’m glad you enjoyed the show, it’s not often I get see someone dance like that’ and he managed a smirk and mimed her.

Allura blushed, she knew it! He was laughing at her moves!

She wanted to tell him off but Romelle reappeared and he excused himself. Stealing one last glance as he closed back the door to the green room. Leaving her with a bundle of confused feelings. If he thought her sign was mean, why was he still evidently flirting with her.

That, however she would have to ponder another day, because for now she had to listen to Romelle describe every detail of her 2-minute conversation with her idol.

END

[trans-darkwing]

song of the night

dt17 / dwd fic | Mallard-Mcquack family | Drake POV | Gos & Drake + Drakepad | 1200~ words |

-

It’s quiet here, in the suburbs, or at least quieter than the inner city, where he’s used to. He can hear night sounds in this place, sounds other than drunken shouts and cars speeding past. In the nighttime here you can only discern the occasional car passing and, on a rare weekend, music echoing distantly through the neighbourhood.

Now, there are bugs singing outside, rhythmic chirps and hums. There’s also rumbling in the distance, the sort of far-off sound of air churning. It might be the wind howling, or a plane flying thousands of feet overhead, or it might be the clouds thundering out the warnings of a storm.

“I wonder if it’s going to rain,” he doesn’t say it especially loud, he doesn’t need to. Gosalyn is tucked close by his side, curled up with her socked feet resting against his legs. The steady sound of Launchpad’s snores has already become part of their ambiance. It’s mostly dark, save for the television casting the room in an unnatural light.

It’s just an idle thought, maybe it will rain, maybe it won’t. He’s perfectly content right here either way. With the security of having his family by his side, safe in their home. Rain might be nice, it could make it feel even cozier.

Gosalyn starts to answer, “I don’t knoooow,” her words stretching with a yawn. Drake breathes a laugh at that, running a hand over her hair. “I don’t think there was supposed to be rain,” she continues speaking, but still rubs her eyes sleepily. Gosalyn is the person to ask about the weather, she's always checking the forecast to see when she can be outside attempting whichever sport of her choosing that day.

“Sounds like someone needs to get to bed,” he speaks, smoothing fingers through over her unruly waves of hair now.

“I’m not even tired, Dad,” she delivers the token protest absently as her eyes are still focused on the TV, it’s long since been muted— by Drake shortly after Gosalyn’s movie had ended. Launchpad had already fallen asleep even before that.

“Uh huh, then who’s yawn was that?” He continues combing fingers through her hair, in sync with the lazy tempo of crickets outside and Launchpad’s slow snores. She leans into the touch, turning her head away from the glow of the screen now to nuzzle into his shirt.

“I can’t go to bed, Dad,” she says instead, voice muffled by the fabric covering his chest.

“And why is that?” he asks dryly.

She lifts her head to look at him directly, those big hazel eyes pleading, “my limbs are too heavy, I can’t possibly walk.”

He gives her a wry smile, “oh, really,” he says, but doesn’t actually protest to her unasked question. Yes, he will carry her.

He secures an arm around her before leveraging himself to standing and hauling her up with him. Steadying himself on the arm of the sofa before starting towards the stairs with her balanced on his hip.

He’s tired himself and he already has a bruised rib that’s aching his side, so maybe he should say no. But quietly, he cherishes things like this, moments when Gosalyn lets him do things she might think she’s too old for. He wonders if it’s the same for her if she’s wishing to hold onto all the things that mean she’s still a child. She’s eleven now and is nearly getting too big to carry this way, but what he wouldn’t give to turn back time, to have every memory of her growing up. But of course, having her now is all that he’ll ever need.

She’s already half-way fallen asleep on his shoulder by the time he reaches her bed. He’s careful as he settles her onto the mattress, pulling the covers up to tuck her in securely. She peeks her eyes open to look up at him with a sleepy smile, he returns it easily, looking down at her with his heart whole and warmed.

“Thanks, Dad,” she murmurs.

He leans on the bed, stooping down to kiss her head, smoothing back her hair once more as he does.

“Of course, sweetheart.” He rights himself, still smiling at her affectionately, “I love you,” he says and hopes she understands how much he means it.

“I love you too,” she responds, before closing her eyes with that smile slowly relaxing into the slackness of sleep.

The door to her room is silent as he shuts it. This house is so quiet. It’s new and doesn’t creak and groan with every movement like the one he grew up in, or like the poorly tended apartment he'd stayed in since then. It’s quiet here, and instead, all the squeaking of overused floorboards and the squealing of hinges they’ll neglect to oil will be all their own. It will come with the years, and the pain, and the healing, and all the love.

He treads back down the stairs with no creaking to trail him, instead, it’s just the crickets and the hum of the fridge in the kitchen and Launchpad’s rumbling snores. He makes his way to the armchair he’s conked out in, smiling fondly to himself. Launchpad was always more of a day person, but Drake had forever been a bird of the night himself.

“Launchpad, LP,” he whispers insistently to the man, shaking his shoulder gently.

He takes in a breath as he comes to, his snoring falling back into regular breathing. It’s cute, Drake thinks, it’s never disturbed his own sleep, so he doesn’t mind the sound of his snores. Gosalyn says that's because they both snore. She swears up and down that he’s just as bad as Launchpad, and that they sound like twin motors revving. Drake doesn’t know whether or not to believe her, but LP’s never complained so he supposes it doesn’t really matter.

He watches as Launchpad blinks his eyes open, and then the second person he loves most in the world is smiling up at him sleepily. Drake is grinning again, cheeks dimpling.

“Hey, DW,” comes his low voice.

“You wanna go lay down in bed before you get a crick in your neck?” Drake asks him, the sharp tone of his question dulled by the warmth in his smile.

“Ugh, I think I already got one,” Launchpad groans, taking the hand Drake offers him wordlessly, barely even having to glance to know it’s there waiting for him. He helps pull him out of the armchair. Though, as he stands, Launchpad doesn’t release him, instead, he only tugs him closer.

Drake allows himself to be wrapped up in big arms, sighing pleasurably as Launchpad nuzzles his bill into the feathers at his neck. He starts to move them in time with a tuneless dance.

“What’s this?” Drake asks, looping his arms around Launchpad’s torso in return.

The man hums, “just love you.”

His breath catches. Drake tries not to let the words affect him too much. Then, it occurs to him there’s absolutely no reason for that and he stops stopping himself. The grin splits his face, and he never knew he could have this. Not this house, all his own, or a daughter he could carry to bed, or someone who would slow dance with him to nothing just because they love him. A family he could cherish, more than anything.

“Love you too,” he breaths in return and doesn’t ignore the tears for once, instead he buries his face in this wonderful man’s chest and lets himself be swayed along with the song of the night. It’s so quiet here, that he can hear it with perfect clarity for once in his life.

[popculturebuffet]

Darkwing Duck Reviews: Darkly Dawns the Duck Pts 1 and 2

It’s a Darkwing Double Feature! Just in time for his ducktales special, I take a look at the introduction of everyone’s favorite Daring Duck of Mystery. In his daring debut we meet Darkwing Duck, an egositical and attention hungry superhero who soon finds himself having to look after a feisty orphan to keep her from getting nabbed by local kingpin of crime Taurus Bulba with the help of his biggest fan. Darkwing owns the night under the cut with decades old spoilers. 

Let’s Get Dangerous.. is tommorow so with that in mind i’m doing a darkwing double feature to refresh myself before the big special. So i’ll be covering both the original series pilot “Darkly Dawns the Duck” and the ducktales reboot episode “The Duck Knight Returns”.  Let’s Get Dangerous Itself because I was so wiped yesterday I didn’t get the other review done and unexpectly got acess to the new episode way earlier than usual so i’d rather focus on that. Got it? Good. Let’s continue past me. 

As usual with a new show a breif bit about my history with it: I watched it years ago, as a friend of mine lent me the first two discs of the season 1 dvd and never found the third one nor asked for them back, nor cared I had them. I thoughtly enjoyed it, had a great time and then it took me a decade or so to actually watch the series again due to a combination of being too stubborn to just buy the season 1 dvd again, a very darkwing move of me in hindsight, and then when disney plus meant I had all episodes at my finger tips I.. sat on them till now.. though to be fair i’ve sat on a LOT of great shows on there including the mandalorian, gargoyles and boy meets world. I have a bad tendency to procastinate, the fact this is coming out so late in the day should be a giveaway. I did read about half of volume 1 of the comic and all of volume 2, so there’s that at least.  Point is this new episode finally made me decide to get off my ass and watch darkwing once again, starting with the pilot and the episodes related to the fearsome four to be ready for tomorrow to see what the differences are (Thoguh I did remember bushroot vividly, so I had that at least).  Something to note before I get started talking about the pilot itself though, is the episode order for Darkwing Duck is a Darkwing Clusterfuck. Now I do understand WHY they aired this way: While some episodes do logically take place after other episodes, you can reasonably pop on just about any darkwing and watch it and enjoy it with minimal need to know what happened in previous episodes, kinda like batman the animated series oddly enough. It was also aired between two networks so on some level I get disney’s confusion here.. but on the other hand it’d take ten minutes, they clearly can call up the creator easily as Tad Stones made a cameo in ducktales 2017 we’ll get to so they could easily get a better order from the creator himself, so they really don’t have an excuse for this, or for slapping the pilot in the middle of season 1. Then again both ducktales 2017 and x-men the animated series were sort of a mess order wise when first put up, so not giving a shit about where episodes are placed for re-watching clearly is a pastime of theirs. 

Now i’ve got that out of my system we can dive into the episode itself and a breif plot synopsis. Darkwing Duck is the superhero protector of St. Canard, a masked vigiliante who takes out crime but wishes he actually got fame and credit for his work. Kind of like Booster Gold but without taking endorsments or as far as we know coming from the future. He also has nothing else as shown by the fact he fights crime, does a training regimine to prepare his breakfast that’s a delight to watch then prepares to sleep. It’s an intresting concept, a hero who HAD a civlian identity once, as the rest of the series would play out, he just no longer needs it. And it’s also ahead of it’s time as batman would explore this idea both seriously with bruce wayne murderer and comedically and seriously with the lego batman movie LONG after this series aired, meaning the writers here figured out what many probably knew about batman and put it into their parody version: Batman is the real identity and Bruce is the mask. Batman only keeps his old self because the bruce id is useful to him: It keeps people away from his company, puts up a playboy facade that draws attention away from him being batman, and allows him to do various charities and what not and help honor his parents in a way that dosen’t involve swooping in and kicking people in the throat. And as seen with bruce wayne murderer when the option to throw bruce away for good came up Batman gladly took it.  This is the same idea: Drake Mallard ONLY cares about crime fighting, has no friends no family, we never do find out jack about his family hopefully if there’s a full reboot series Frank and Matt fix it for their version. He has nothing, and is fine with that. He hasn’t really had a reason to care about anything else than his own glory and works alone not because it’s less efficent but because his oversized ego means he dosen’t want to share credit. IT’s an intresting start and his ego would be a defining bit of who he is and used intrestingly int he reboot but we’ll get to that there. 

His life changes forever though when local crime boss Taurus Bulba unleashes his latest scheme: To steal the Ramrod, a gravity manipulating device created by the late Dr. Quackmeyer.. late because Bulba’s men killed him and were dumb enough not to get the arming code for the ramrod first a year ago. Bulba is also behind bars but in one of my faviorite gags of the episode despite the warden’s constnat gloating, Bulba has taken the “Supervillian makes jail into a base” Or “Jail is nothing to a supervillian who can easily get out trope” to ludcrious machines. He has whole meetings with his minions, keeps the ramrod once he gets his hands on it in the laundry and has a ship SHAPED LIKE HIS FACE built into his cellblock. I’ts just so over the top it’s glorious. But yeah since Bulba can’t go after it at first he sends his three goofy minons, one played by eddie “Mandark” deezen in.. love that guy. 

THey do end up stealing the ramrod thanks to the help of bulba’s cool, non-anthromporhic condor who he uses as his right hand man and as his link to his minons via a small tv aroudn it’s neck. That.. is awesome. Darkwing spots the condor but fails to stop the three stooges or the condor and gets unknowingly blamed for the robbery..and stopped to get glamor shots not realizing the guy thought he was a criminla which.. fair enough. It is a shadowy disguise after all. 

Darkwing ends up grabbing onto the vulture sonic 3 style, but ends up falling off him into a hangar where we meet the original version of Launchpad McQuack, whose apparently quit working for scrooge and has his own hangar now though it wouldn’t be a stretch that scrooge bought it for him.. he does , stingy as he is, appricate hard work and launchpad wanting to start his own buisness and while hte planes were probably all on launchpad, Scrooge would gladly buy a run down buliding for a loyal friend who wants to put in some hard honest work. Plus it’s a free place to store any vehicles he has in the st canard area.. I mean it’s still scrooge. And yes I know the whole “Tad stones said they aren’t the same universe” non sense. I do have the utmost respect for the guy and he seems really, nice but I don’ tlike that, no one likes that and both the comics and the current duckverse with the ducktales reboot entirely ignore that for good reason.While the two shows are diffrent in tone they stil lfit and it’s not a stretch for launchpad to want to spread his wings or failing that scrooge to help push him out of the nest and give him his own buisness or one of scrooge’s to run. 

But while Launchpad does help DW with a propeller plane they fail and while launchpad offers to be his sidekick, DW gives him the old I work alone bit.  However him being alone won’t last for long as Bulba still needs that arming code and since his only lead is Waddlemeyer’s grandaughter who grew up in his lab, he sends his buffonish minons to go get him. Why he never sends his lone female minon with them is because it’s funnier if she dosen’t I guess. Which it is so fair enough.  So thus we enter Goslyn, who the head of the orphanage is fed up with due to her antics. Goslyn is played as most of you knwo by christine cavanagh.. I honestly forgot and it still throws me off a bit she’s using what would later be her chucky finster voice for a character so completely diffrent. Granted it’s not unusual in voice acting, just weird here and only for me personally having grown up with rugrats but not darkwing. The orphanage head is a bit less jarring as she’s played by Marcia Wallace, aka Edna Krabable from the simpsons but A) that show was already running at this point and B), the character is basically a nicer version of edna versus chuckies voice coming out of a tiny if immensly fun to watch hellion. I do like goslyn, sh’es a fun character even in her shadier moments, it’s just something i’d forgotten about i’ll need to get used to is all. 

Bulba’s hired goons come in claming ot be friends of her grandpas and we actually get some really heartwrenching context for Gos’ behavior: While she does act out she actually LIKES THE orphanage.. ti’s just her friends keep getting adopted while no one wants someone “full of spirit”. It’s heartwrecnhing to hear.. and only gets worse when the goons try and kidnap her.  Thankfully Darkwing.. also kidnaps her, but he kindaps her from kidnappers and while Goslyn naturally takes a second to realize he’s the good guy them shooting at him clues her in. Darkwing, in a rare for the series as a whole moment of reason and not wanting to just power though something himself TRIES to do the responsible thing and leave gos with the police where she’ll be protected.. but given they think he’s a wanted criminal they shoot at him.. and the small child in his motorcycle. Yup that’s the police alright. 

So with no other options Darkwing takes gos home, hyjinks insue including her activintg the breakfast thing. But the two genuinely start to bond. While Darkwing dosen’t WANT to keep her around, the whole not wanting connections thing, it’s clear he’s growing fond of the little snot as she holds her own with his trianing course, they have a tickle fight and in the sweetest moment of the episode the two sing little girl blue, a song her grandfather used to sing her to sleep that she teaches darkwing. It’s an utterly heartmelting bit and Cummings and Cavanagh really sell the hell out of it. It also however turns out ot be plot relevant: Turns out just in case Dr. Waddlemeyer hid the code for the ramrod in the song, and when Darkwing sees a photo Goslyn got from bulba’s goons, he realizes this and realizes that depsite thinking she didn’t know it Goslyn had it all along.. and that as long as h’es around she won’t know.  Bulba is naturally livid at his minons failure and decides now’s the time to take this into his own hands and while he actually liked the prison hq setup, as it did make sense as it was the perfect cover and the warden was too full of himself to realize Bulba was still active and too convinced the bull was beaten down when he clearly wasn’t, but instead as mentioned above awesomely converts his cellblock into a flying ship in the shape of his own head.  Bulba.. is a great villian and I only think the show didn’t use him more because he’s a dead serious, deadly dangerous villian in an otherwise goofy but fun superhero parody show. The show later gained Negaduck, so they had a more dangerous threat for darkwing that fit the show’s tone better while still being utterly terrifying, and likely simply didn’t need him till the idea for the steerminator came up. But I love the guy: he reminds me a lot of the kingpin, a threatning villian who uses his sheer size to beat our hero down, is cool and suave and is an utter mastermind at planning. He also wears a nice suit.  And naturlaly he has a plan to take out darkwing since despite the two never having met, as Darkwing disparages when Goslyn assumes their lifelong mortal enmies like in the comics, they know of each other.. and thus bulba knows exactly what trap to spring to get him out of the way and goslyn into his ship: He flashes a message in morris code that he wants to surrender to Darkwing while stroking his ego a LOT. And it works... while i’ts an obvious trap Darkwing’s so full of himself he goes despite Goslyn telling him it’s very obviously a trap.  Naturally everything goes pear shaped as a result: Bulba shows up, revealing gos not only to be right but easily pummling Darkwing. Which makes sense: While Darkwing is a vetran crime fighter and secret agent, Bulba’s been at being a villian longer clearly as he’s built up enough of a rep both for Darkwing to know him out of hand and for the warden to be proud capturing him. Given what univese this is, it probably isn’t Bulba’s first round with a superhero and given at this stage St Canard only has one.. yeah Darkwing is outclasssed and the police grab him while Bulba scarpers. And while Gos puts up a good fight using the trianing course, Bulba’s vulture gets her. Bulba has everything he needs.  Darkwing meanwhile actually bemoans what a dick he’s been, that the first person he’s cared about besides himself in possibly ever is now in the hands of a murderous mastermind, and that he’s stuck in jail with no one to call on for help. Thankfully.. help arrives.. and by help I mean launchpad backing the ratcatcher, Darkwing’s bike, into the prisoin. He DID come just to bail DW out despite his earlier jerkishness, but backed in and Darkwing not beliving superheroes have time for paperwork, decides to just bust out. And to be ifair int his case he’s probably right as you know, a ten year old might die if they don’t get there in time. So off they go.. but with Bulba in the air they need something with wings to catch him. ANd luckily as Launchpad mentioned earlier he’s been working on something special for darkwing.  It’s with this we enter the thunderquack, which is DW”S awesome headshaped plane. It’s just cool it’s got a nice design, goofy enough tof it the universe but cool enoguh to still be fun to watch. Darkwing has really damn cool vehicles, as the ratcatcher is also awesomely iconic. But yeah the thunderquack impresses darkwing and rightfully so and he decides to make LP his sidekick afterall.  So now our heroes fly into the danger zone and attack bulba’s airship with Darkwing landing on the bow and a scuffle insues with darkwing and hte minons.. who use actual guns which for a 90′s kids show is  a suprise, especially one this intentioanlly goofy, but boy is it nice. However Bulba, being awesomely evil, isn’t dumb and instead of fighting darkwing, which he could win but would win him nothing and having gotten nothing out of goslyn, figures the hero might know the code.. and while Darkwing lies and says he dosen’t, Bulba points out .. he’s right.. but he’s always been a gambling man and has his condor drop goslyn to lure drake into telling him , with DW putting in the code and bulba testing it with a bank robbery.. before predictably having his condor drop the girl because he no longer needs her. Thankfully launchpad catches her in time and then they get revenge on the condor with the thunderquack BITING IT.. which is awesome. Hopefully the reboot version does that. 

Darkwing meanwhile saves the day, his new daughter and the city by simply sneaking over to the ramrod and mashign the keys till it overloads, silly, but undeniably awesome and effective. Bulba TRIES to finish off darkwing this time for foiling his plan.. btu the ramrod explodes and while bulba’s minons and goslyn and launchpad are safe... bulba and darkwing are apparently dead and it’s effective.  A few weeks later Goslyn’s back at the orphanage utterly distraught and broken at being basically orphaned again. Naturally though Darkwing’s alive, having taken his old identnity back since now he has something worth using it for and adopts her, hinting at who he is so she goes with him. And Drake has changed.. sure he’ll still be as egostical and impuslive as he was here.. but he’s no longer just darkwing.. he’s drake again as he has someone worth fighting for.. two someones in fact. He has a friend, a loyal partner to help him fight cime. And more importantly.. he has a loving daughter. And both needed each other: Goslyn needed someone who understood her despite her manic energy, and Drake needed someone who needed him and not darkwing, a reason to be a person outside the cape and cowl and outside the attention again. He needed a reason to live again... and he’s got it. And it’s going to be great. 

Final Thoughts: This pilot is excellent. Well paced, plenty of laughs, tense action and great introductions for everyone involved as well as a hell of a vilian> This is how you do a first episode: it introduces the main themes of the show, both comedically and dramatically, introduces the cast and gives us a one off , or rather two off it’d turn out, villian whose compelling and intresting. IT’s really damn good stuff and I can’t wait ot see what frank does with a simlar story tommorow. Until then, stay safe, and happy hallowen. We’ll be back shortly for The Duck Knight returns and then Let’s Get Dangerous tommorow. 

[ray-the-fanatic]

Fluffvember promt hand holding.

The camping trip.

Ducktales 2017| drakepad| one shot

Yep still doing thos whole fanfic thingy hoping this one is better than my last two. Also posted to my AO3 account

___________________

“Sure I’ll come along” Drake answered as he was removing his hat and cape after another night of patrolling the city. Looking back to back to Launchpad who was helping out by doing some maintenance on Drake’s soon to be ratcatcher.

“Really? You want to tag along on a woodchuck trip?” Launchpad asked again as he stopped and sat beside the vehicle so he could look at Drake. 

"Yes LP" Drake confirmed again smiling slightly as he did “it’ll be fun and I could show those scouts what an old pro is like.” He barged as he gave an impressive flick of his hat getting it to land on top of Launchpad’s head like it was planned. The small pump of his hand gave away that it was by chance. “And you know it be nice to spend time with you as well.” He said a bit softer like he wasn’t too sure if he should have.

“Yeah?” Launchpad said as he lifted the hat up and smiled softly, “It would be fun to hang out with Drake Mallard, I hear he's a pretty cool guy.” 

That prompted a slight laugh from Drake “So it's just an overnight night cookout type thing?" He asked mentally thinking about what he needed to do in preparation.

"Yeah just roasting some hotdogs and marshmallows for the night...course the kids also want to tell stories." Launchpad mentioned with less excitement 

"Oh like ghost stories I remember doing that." He then looked over to Launchpad who was now tugging the hat down a bit to cover his face. Drake walked over to him  bending slightly as he lifted the hat up “Hey you okay there big guy?" He asked smiling 

Launchpad felt the butterflies in his stomach start to flutter. He liked when Drake called him that, cause he could count on him. Which he liked even more. 

"Yeah, I'm fine DW."

"You sure there?" Drake asked not seeming to convinced "seems like something bothering you?" he added on as Launchpad tried averting his eyes.

Launchpad stood up suddenly knocking Drake over in the process. "Nope I'm fine I better head out I'll text you when I'm on my way to getcha," he said running off.

"Wait, Launchpad my hat- oh I'll just get it back later."

It didn't take long to get the camping site set up. The scouts already knew some basics as they got their tents ready Launchpad and Drake took care of getting their bonfire started, Drake being the one to start it in cause Launchpad overdid it again. 

“Can’t believe I tripped over that branch” Drake complained the embarrassment not fading still 

“Hey least some of the kids got a chance to earn a first aid badge too.” Launchpad reminded him as he gestures to the bandages on Drake. “so bringing you along really turned out to be a good idea. ” Drake tried to keep his annoyed expression but cracked when hearing Launchpad laugh. His bruised ego stood no chance against that.

Drake smile softened as he took a moment to just stare at his friend enjoying it as long as he could. Till he heard a slight cough come from behind him. Drake looked over to see, he wanted to say, Huey. He was still learning the kids' name.

"Uh yes?" Drake said realizing he got caught and sat up straight fast as he could quickly elbowing Launchpad for the duckling.

"Oh hey, Huey reporting in?" 

“All setup, sticks are ready to cook hot dogs and our s’mores supplies are well stocked and organized. Ready for the correct assembly order.” He reported happily “Were all on schedule for the storytelling tonight as well.” 

Huey seemed to pick his words with care but Launchpad still seemed to tense up a bit. Catching Drake’s attention right away. The young pilot smiled best he could muster and nodded to Huey. “Great we got the fire going so get the others.” He tried to avoid Drake’s eyes but could easily feel them on him as Huey smiled and took off. 

“Yeah it will be getting dark soon that will really help set the tone for the kids,” Drake said eyeing Launchpad his suspicious growing. 

“R right good um aura?” Launchpad said 

“You mean atmosphere?” Drake asked, “Launchpad are yo-” 

“That too! Well better gather up the campers” Launchpad said as he got up quickly catching up to Huey. He plucked him off his feet then ran off snagging each kid the same way with ease.

Leaving Drake to just stare, being the great detective he was, Drake knew something wasn’t right. Launchpad was pretty open so it was weird for him to be well pulling what Drake tended to. Drake thought as he pokes at the base of the fire thinking to himself. 

The scouts had finished up eating all excited to get a chance to tell their stories and hear what the others had to share as well. Drake was walking around with Huey in tow giving each camper what they needed for their smores. Then they both took a seat by the fire as Huey got his own marshmallow going. 

"Hey um, Huey" Drake said suddenly unsure what he was actually going to say. When the duckling looked up at him. 

"Is something I don't know bothering Launchpad?" Drake wasn’t too sure what to ask, the kid might not even know.

"Oh well" Huey started as he looked over at Launchpad who was getting the camper's attention at the moment. Part of him wanted to keep quiet but he thought maybe it would be okay to say something. "Launchpad doesn't really handle stuff like this well." 

"Stuff like this?" Drake questioned 

"He likes to watch horror movies and all but he gets scared easily. I think he was close to attacking one of my brothers once after he and Mrs. Beakley took us to see a movie about mole men." 

Drake looked back over to Launchpad and watched him as he fidgeted around as he spoke. 

"So that's it," Drake said things started to click was that why he invited Drake along? Wait what did that mean. Did he feel safe with him around? Drake blushed a bit at the thought. He was a superhero so maybe that's why? He corrected trying not to get his hopes up.

"Alright, who's first?" Launchpad's voice cut through Drakes thoughts suddenly.

All the kids' hands shot up into the air right away after he asked after Launchpad picked one to start them off he sat back down. Drake got up and made his way over to Launchpads side as the first scout began to start his tale, Launchpad looking tenser as he sat up straight and clenched his hands up into tightly held fists, his knuckles slightly popping out as he tried pulling his fingers in more. 

Launchpad just gave a forced smile when Drake sat beside him, Drake took the smile into account wondering how Launchpad would go about this if the roles were reversed. Launchpad seemed to always know how to cheer Drake up like before. Drake was less experience in well the whole people thing. He glanced down at Launchpads hand which were resting on his knees. They were slightly shaking now. Drake racked his brain for a moment and went with the only idea he had. Maybe it was stupid but it was something at least.

 Launchpad was trying to keep himself still, even as the small bear kid went on to describe the monster of his story. A sludge beast with rows of razor-sharp teeth. Trying his best not to imagine it. But, that was hard with how good the kid describe it. He tightly shut his eyes hoping to block out the thought only to feel the sensation of warmth come over one of his hands. Launchpad chanced a glance down hoping it wasn't because of the sluggish monster he definitely wasn’t thinking of. Only to have the sight of Drake's hand on top of his, he looked over to Drake who seemed to purposely keep his attention ahead of him. 

Launchpad was about to speak up only to stop when he felt Drake gently tap his finger against the back of his hand. Looking back down as he saw Drake use the same finger make a circle motion in the air, prompting the larger duck to turn his hand over. He looked back to Drake, who side glanced at him. He knew it was dumb but he had to try. So he gave a slight shrug of his shoulders and offered his hand uncertainly to Launchpad. Launchpad went and took hold of Drake's hand, enjoying the familiar warmth of it again. And the comfort it brought him. 

Drake turned back to face the kids glad his idea seemed to work out as he rested his chin in his free hand. Launchpad grinning happily unable to fully hear anything over the sound of his heartbeat in his ear.

"Okay but what about the wailing willow ghost lady in Tad's story, she could strangle you and make you see every painful memory" Launchpad asked. 

"How can a ghost touch you though?" Drake said trying to poke holes in each story. 

"That's why it’s scary!" Launchpad defended but by the raised brow Drake gave he didn't seem convinced. "Well when I'm paralyzed by fear of my most painful memories you'll feel bad"

" that won't happen," Drake said causing launchpad to look slightly hurt, confused on what Drake meant.

" Because obviously I'll already there as Darkwing Duck" Drake said to answer the confusion well smiling. "I am the terror that flaps in the night after all." He stated proud then looked over to the fire realizing just how long they had stayed up. The kids had headed off hours ago and the fire was on its last embers. Drake was used to being late so he had a good guess at the time.

"So was there a reason you didn't say anything?" He asked finally. While slightly giving a squeeze to Launchpad's hand so to make his question clear.

"Its kind of dumb DW." Launchpad said as he tried not to react. 

"Come on big guy what is it you always say, I can’t know unless you speak up?”

Launchpad rubbed the back of his neck with his free hand there it was again the nickname he loved so much. "I guess I was embarrassed. I know you count on me a lot when it comes to the hero thing. Guess I was worried you’d think you couldn’t cause I get the jitters from a few stories.” 

"That's why you were acting weird cause of me?" Drake asked a bit concerned 

"Heh yeah, I like how you see me and I didn't want that to change. That's why you call me big guy right" 

"Well no, I'm not really original with nicknames...I never really been friends with anyone long enough to give one too" Drake said then quickly added on "it's okay to be scared though I'm pretty much always scared." Drake said straight-faced 

"You? No way" launchpad said actually surprised 

Getting Drake to laugh a bit "you know though if any of the monsters from the stories somehow turn out to be real. You could just call me. And Darkwing Duck will chase them off " 

"I can?"

"Of course day or night I'll get there in a snap. Heck  just set me on speed dial." Drake said then chuckled awkwardly as his cheeks gained a bit of pink to them. Mumbling why did I say that to himself. 

"So I can call at any time?" was all Launchpad said, "Does it have to be only if I'm in trouble?" "Can I call for Drake Drake Mallard too?"

Drake looked at him surprised "me?" 

"Yeah like can I call if I have a question, you'll know the answer too? Or can I call to see if you wanna just get some lunch together or if I just wanna" hear your voice he thought as he trailed off. Starting to lace his fingers with Drakes so he could hold his hand closer.WIshing he could say that out loud. 

Drake froze for a bit taking in the feeling as he held tighter to Launchpad's hand "Well yeah any time you just want to is also an option. Darkwing or Drake either will be happy to answer.” 

They both just smiled at each other quickly looking away to find something, anything else to focus on. Neither wanting to let go because they didn't want that feeling to end just yet whatever it was that seemed to hang in the air between them. Neither really sure what words to put to it just knowing they wanted to stay like this for a while longer. 

"Hey, Drake?" Launchpad said breaking the silence 

"Yes?"

"I still like the nickname so you know don't stop using it."

Drake laughed again, Launchpad hoping to keep being a reason for it "No worries Big guy, I won't" 

[duckverse-imaginations-archived]

Drakepad for the ship questions (because you deserve it :] )

Yes thank you!!! Otp number 1 your amazing cause now I can geek out about them

~Launchpad McQuack x Drake Mallard~

•Who is the most affectionate?

Drake, he cant keep his hands to himself. Always holding on to Launchpad or pulling him down for kisses cause height wont stop him.

•Big spoon/Little spoon?

LP is the big spoon he loves holding Drake close to him so he can rest his face in Drakes neck

•Most common argument?

Likely these two fight about throwing themselves into danger trying to save the other. Neither one wants to imagine what could happen. 

•Favorite non-sexual activity?

Watching Darkwing Duck together 

•Who is most likely to carry the other?

Launchpad likely to carry Drake especially if Drake is tried from late nights 

•What is their favorite feature of their partner’s?

Drake just loves how big Launchpad is in general 

Launchpad loves how expressive Drakes face and body language is especially when he monologues

•What’s the first thing that changes when they realize they have feelings for the other?

Drake wants to be better and trys to be more open 

Launchpad trys to face his fears more so he can help Drake out 

•Nicknames? & if so, how did they originate?

Launchpad- DW cause Drake is Darkwing duck 

Drake- LP cause it matches with what he calls him. Also Big guy cause well obvious reasons. 

These two dorks definitely call each other sweetie honey bea babe and anything else 

•Who worries the most?

Drake actually, it's one thing if he gets hurt but if Launchpad is hurt he goes full mother hen 

•Who remembers what the other one always orders at a restaurant?

Launchpad tends to pick up food for stake outs so hes memorized Drakes order after awhile 

•Who tops?

I see Drake as a switch and Launchpad definitely dosent mind. But Launchpad also enjoys pushes Drake over the edge.  

•Who initiates kisses?

Both any chance they get. They have a toll system kiss to pass

•Who reaches for the other’s hand first?

Drake tends to especially if they are watching a movie Goslyn picked 

•Who kisses the hardest?

Both. these two just have to express thier feelings always

•Who wakes up first?

Launchpad definitely he dosent need much sleep to be ready for the day again 

•Who wants to stay in bed just a little longer?

Drake all day if possible, forever if Launchpad stays with him 

•Who says I love you first?

Could be either but for this Drake did. After second guessing if he should or  it for a long time 

"I love you, God your gorgeous and amazing and I just want you to crush me"

"You what?"

"Did I stutter?"

•Who leaves little notes in the other’s one lunch? (Bonus: what does it usually say?)

Drake leaves Launch pad notes 

Hey big guy I know you tend to just grab whatever you can but please eat something better today. I made everything with love. Oh please grab some milk were almost out! Love you lots!!

•Who tells their family/friends about their relationship first?

Launchpad cant help but share that hes dating Drake first chance he gets

If drake has adopted gosyln before he talks to her about it 

•What do their family/friends think of their relationship?

Goslyn is all for it she knows they are meant to be

The McDuck family isnt surprised at all they knew it would happen 

•Who is more likely to start dancing with the other?

Drake he likes to dip Launchpad and of course Launchpad swoons over it  

•Who cooks more/who is better at cooking?

Launchpad tries his best, but Drake tends to take over cooking duty he has more practice with it 

•Who comes up with cheesy pick up lines?

Drake always dosent matter even if married hes gonna hit his husband up 

Drake: "I wanna be a super hero guess my name"

Launchpad: "oh easy Darkwing Duck"

Drake: "nope I'm yourman" winks

Launchpad: *blushing* "can you put your costume on?"

•Who whispers inappropriate things in the other’s ear during inappropriate times?

Despite how innocent he seems Launchpad dose it's just another form affection to him and he loves making Darkwing duck blush 

•Who needs more assurance?

Drake, hes got a bit of issues going on especially when it comes to being a parent worried about being like his.

But Launchpad has some of his own trending to worry about how long his usefulness will last 

•What would be their theme song?

I made a whole post on them making a playlist for each other mainly for songs I felt fit them best so out of all of those definitely saying 

Did I say that outloud by bear naked ladies 

•Who would sing to their child back to sleep?

Both, launchpad more often will though. Drake tends to only sing the one song since its connected to such a speical moment for him 

•What do they do when they’re away from each other?

Launchpad may be off with scrooge either driving him somewhere or on an adventure or hes hanging out with Dewey

Drake may just be soloing as Darkwing duck or at SHUSH or hes having to meet with Gosplyns principal again

•one headcanon about this OTP that breaks your heart

Drakes been made to feel he pushes people away or hurts them, so he pushes down his feeling for Launchpad for so long feeling he doesn't deserve that happiness and out of fear of hurting Launchpad something he just couldn't live with 

•one headcanon about this OTP that mends it

That Launchpad fell for him too and is honest about it and willing to be patient for Drake as they figure things out together because he loves Drake and really wants to see where things will go.

♡♡♡♡♡♡

[absollnk]

Censored and Slightly Refined version of “Three makes a fucking Burrito” I’m using for school (to clarify this is 2k words of agent 24 fluff)

Censor count (excluding minor swears): 8

Three's apartment was divided into four main sections: Bedroom, Bathroom, Living Room, and Kitchen. All of them had their own set of odors, but the Kitchen had the most by far. While the others wouldn't have more than a couple, the Kitchen's got butter, burnt microwave pizza, garbage, burnt cheese, vanilla air freshener, burnt tortilla,  T h e   S i n k…   That's all Three can remember off the top of her head. It's an omnipresent reminder of the fact that she isn't physically capable of actual cooking, or baking, or anything else of the sort. And that's a problem, because she wanted to surprise Eight with a nice, homemade dinner at least once before one of them kicked the bucket. And why not today, she thought. It would only be harder as she got older.

     Homemade. That's it. The thing that Three can't do. Her skillset is limited to cereal, kool-aid, and stuff with instructions on the package. Anything else never happened, and that's a problem because yada yada Eight, yada yada surprise. 

Damnit, now Three's procrastinating.

Three snapped back to reality and was staring right at her tiny electric stove. It had only two panels for pots or whatever they're called, and only one of them has she ever used. It had a huge black burn mark that's been building up over time that Three hides with a pan whenever the landlord visits. It was probably mostly cheese and ramen juice. 

Who was Three kidding. There was no way she could cook anything even remotely fancy for Eight. Not without help from the Bastard™.

Three sat herself on the counter, pulled her phone out of her pocket, and almost called Four before messaging her instead. It would be harder for her to ask questions.

Three: Hey

Four: This is already suspicious

Three: I need your help with something

Four: I'm honored, what do you want grumpy

Three: Im going to ignore that

Three: I need help with cooking something

Four: Hmm

Four: Is it for Eight?

Hmph.

Three: No

Four: I know you aren't cooking for yourself, you sad little swamp monster

Four: And there's no way you're doing it for anyone else

Hmph.

Three: Well played

Three: Help me or I remove a corner of your head with a brick

Four: Fine

Four: I'm only helping because I know you love me :)

Three: I love you like a sister

Three: >10% of the time

Four: :}

Three: Help me

Four: First of all, what do you even want to make for her?

Oh, that's another thing. Three doesn't know what Eight likes. All she had for most of her life was basically nutritious sawdust, so nearly everything up on the surface is fantastic to her. It's hard to tell what she likes more than other things.

Three: No clue, she likes everything

Four: Well, then what does she like more than average?

Four: Gee whiz, Three. Use your head!!! Do you have any more brain cells than your name implies?

Three: Listen

Three: If I knew, I would've told you, twat. It's hard to tell what she likes extra

Three: Wait just had an idea

Three: I should make her something she's never had before

Four: That might be difficult

Four: Didn't Eight gain like ten pounds right after she escaped because Off the Hook took her to so many food joints?

Three: Yeah but

Three: Im like 84% sure she's never had a burrito

Four: Gourmét

Three: Shut the hell up

Three: You know just as well as I do that her first burrito better be a damn good one

Four: True

Four: So a burrito it is?

Three: Yeah

Four: Ok that's not that hard

Four: What do you think she would like in a burrito?

Three: Probably just bean and cheese or something

Three: Maybe a little bit of hot sauce

Four: Do you have those things?

Three: Damnit

Three: Hold on I'm gonna go get those real quick

Four: Are you serious

Three: Yeah give me like ten minutes

Four: Good luck

Three checked the time as she dashed to the door. 6:03 P.M. She had exactly twenty-seven minutes to have a perfect bean n' cheese ready before Eight finished clothes shopping with Off the Hook. 

Three was fully aware of how illegal it was to super jump anywhere in Inkopolis that wasn't currently being used for recreation (turfing/ranked/league). She was also fully aware of how unenforced that law was. Every other day or so, you would get to see some random idiot land on the rooftop of some random building because they're in a rush. It was Three's turn to be that idiot. Again.

Three ran up her apartment complex's stairwell until she reached the door to the roof. It was covered in mechanical nonsense that she didn't recognize but found familiar after being seen so many times. Three was very confident in her super jump accuracy. Working for the NSS is the reason, no doubt. All those launchpads every other minute… Ever since Three chewed up and spat out and on Octavio, she hadn't missed a single jump. Except for the time she was in a panic and almost got flattened to the road.

Three aligned herself with the closest grocery store, shifted into a squid, and took off. She soared through the air and landed right on the roof of a MakoMart. Not the one modified for turfing. 

She dropped off the side and jog-ran around to the front entrance. The automatic doors slid open and Three dashed inside.

It wasn't too busy, being Thursday. It looked to be mostly filled with Jellies and older Inklings. Three was very familiar with the store. She's bought food almost exclusively from here since moving into her apartment 3 years back. She still had almost no idea where anything was because she only buys six or seven things over and over again.

She snatched a basket and walked along the outsides of the aisles, scanning the signs for the things she needed. She knew cheese was at the back with the other refrigerated stuff, she'd get that last.

Three saw "tortillas" on a sign along with other bread and bread-like items above an aisle near the center of the store. Unlike most MakoMarts, this one carried almost exclusively food and a few other essentials. It didn't have to be so disgustingly large like the rest of its locations.

It occurred to Three that she had no knowledge on the difference between the two types of tortillas. She knew that one was good and that the other should be reserved only for the residents of Extra-Hell, but she didn't know which was which. She had no choice. Time was running slim already, it's 6:06. Only 24 minutes left. It's time to call.

Four picked up on the first ring. "Sup?"

"I don't remember which tortillas don't taste like garbage."

"Just get the name brand ones."

Three dropped a pack into her basket and instantly had second thoughts. It was like one of those scenes in cheesy horror movies when Protagonist picks up the object that just happens to be cursed.

"Are you sure? I think they hate me."

"Were they more expensive?"

"Yes."

"Then you're good. Now go get some canned microwaveable beans. You don't have the time or equipment to make anything better." Four hung up.

After Three found all that she needed, she speed-walked back to the front of the store. The place's only downside was the lack of self checkout; talking to a cashier was necessary.

On the contrary, the amount of open lanes was usually more than the amount of customers, so that was a plus.

Three found an empty lane and threw the ingredients onto the conveyor. She started fumbling with her watch before anything even reached the dude about to scan her stuff.

He seemed to notice Three's hurried state and tried to work quickly to match it. Because Three only bought three things (tortillas, bag of shredded cheese, mild hot sauce), the cashier had her total in under 15 seconds.

"927 g, please." Three held out her wrist and he scanned her watch, taking the needed money. "See you again on Friday," he dismissed her. Three gave a thumbs-up and dashed out the automatic doors.

Three ran back around into the alley and super jumped back to the roof of her apartment building from there. She took the stairwell back to her floor and ran to her apartment and kicked the door open. She left it unlocked because:

A. she would only be gone for a short time, and

B. no one would want her stuff anyway.

Three dumped the food onto the counter and called Four. She answered on the fifth ring.

"Hot sauce," she said immediately.

"I'm back," Three replied.

"What.. the hell? You were only gone for, like, 6 minutes."

"Yeah, and Eight gets back in 22."

"Okay, you need to slow down," said Four. "Making a burrito takes less than five minutes and you know her moms are always late. In fact, I'd recommend just waiting for a bit so Eight doesn't have to eat cold burrito."

"I.. fine, you're right. What should I do in the meantime? Should I turn on the stove early? What pan should I- nevermind I only have one. I should rewash it to make sure it's clean..."

"Girl, chill out," said Four. "You have so much time right now. Your pan is clean. Put the cheese in the fridge and wait like twenty minutes before you start doing anything. Then call me back."

Three took a deep breath. "Ok. Talk to you then."

"Now you're getting it. Bye." Four hung up.

Three spent the next twenty minutes mentally preparing for 6:28 p.m. and the events that would follow. It was like preparing for a hard boss fight, except losing wouldn't just mean wasting a few hours. It would mean disappointing her. Gorl. Eight.

And that can't happen.

Finally, Three watched as the timer on her phone hit zero. It was time. She called Four yet again and she answered on the first ring.

"I was expecting you," Four said.

"It's been twenty minutes," Three replied.

"You're an absolute child," Four said. "Turn on the burner."

So that's what it's called. Burner.

"How high?" Three asked.

"It literally doesn't matter. Just remove the tortilla once it gets nice tan spots on both sides."

After a hectic five minutes of preparing a burrito, four more of starting over, and Four's patience being worn thin, Three had something she was satisfied with. She had to admit to herself, it looked good. She wrapped it in tinfoil to preserve the heat.

No more than 24 seconds later did Three hear a knock on the door. "I'm hanging up," Three told Four matter-of-factly.

"Oh, come on!" She complained. "I worked hard to get you here. I'm going to see.. hear the payoff."

"Fine, but shut up."

There was another knock. "Hello? It's Eight."

“And us,” Marina shouted.

"Be there in a sec!" Three turned to her phone. "I said shut up."

"I didn't say anything!"

Three opened the door and Eight was there, flanked by Pearl and Marina. "Hi," Three said.

"Why are you smiling so unnaturally wide?" asked Marina.

"No," responded Three.

"That doesn't even make sense," said Pearl. "What's burning?"

"No I'm not," said Three. Eight snickered.

"You know, you're lucky," said Marina. "Any other time I would do a full-scale search of your apartment, but we have to announce a Splatfest tomorrow."

"She'd also interrogate you detective-style," said Pearl.

"Ah" was all Three could generate as a response. It's not like what they said deserved a better one.

"We'll be fine," Eight told them.

"Well, alright then. See you soon," concluded Marina. 

"Be safe," added Pearl as the two ran off.

"Three?" Eight called after a few seconds. "You there?"

"Yeah, sorry," Three said. "Those two know how to get into my head."

"Everyone does," Eight pointed out.

"Soooooo, I, uh, made you a burrito."

"Ooohh! Is that what's on fire?"

"No! That's just what my stove smells like. Here." Three lead Eight to the section of her counter that functioned as a table. 

"Tada," said Three with minimal enthusiasm.

"Uh, eating metal doesn't really.. work. I've tried."

"Oh, l need to take off the foil… now tada."

"Ooooooohhhh!" Eight oohed. "That's what that is! I've seen them in commercials and stuff but I didn't know what they were called. They looked good."

Eight took a moment to figure out how to hold the burrito and took a bite as Three watched in anticipation. It felt like one of those cooking shows but completely not at all at the same time.

"It's good!" Eight said after swallowing her bite.

"That's all?" asked Three, slightly disappointed.

"Well, it's warm and it tastes good and it's a little spicy, which I really like, but the crust is kinda weird."

"Crust? The tortilla?" Three asked. And then it clicked. She took another from the bag to make sure. She took a bite out of the tortilla and gagged.

"Haha, got ‘em," said Four through Three's phone.

Three threw the phone into the dishwasher, slammed it shut, and started it.