#i also dont want to survive that long either | Explore Tumblr posts and blogs

prettyboykatsuki · 5 months ago

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give yourself up, my treat | h. sakura

✮ tags ; afab + fem!reader (referred to as girlfriend, descriptions of makeup and nails), implied to be shorter than sakura, omorashi, piss!!!! / wetting, humiliation, lots of crying / embarrassment, praise kink, somewhat public, femdom, depictions of subspace, d/s dynamics, like... soft loving sex as aftercare but this is honestly pure kink lol sorry, 18+

✮ wc ; 4.6k (i dont want to talk about it man)

✮ a/n ; this is piss kink. like. full stop. full stop omorashi. im warning you now that this is piss kink to the highest extent. srry sakura . finally let him top and it was after making him piss himself. rip

also!! while sakura is describing how shameful he feels he is doing this all very willingly. they have a safeword but sakura does not feel any need to use it.

✮ synopsis ; sakura lets you push his limits any way you please.

Sakura listens to everything you say. Like some kind of moron.

Can’t help himself really, as much as it irritates him to admit.

That’s always just been his instinct. Any time he finds himself in unfamiliar waters, he leans into that as much as possible. He’s survived a long time by trusting his intuition and a longstanding distrust of other people. It speaks a lot to someone's character usually if Sakura is even mildly inclined to trust them.

He isn’t sure if it’s his intuition that drives him to follow your order without question, but it’s a strong enough pull he finds he can’t help himself even when he so, so badly wants to resist it.

It’s not Sakura’s fault. It’s not really yours either. That’s just how you’ve always been. How its always been.

(Once, well before you and Sakura were a thing - Nirei had made an observation about you. Called you disarming. Suo laughed and agreed before adding that it felt a little misleading to describe you that way even if it was true.

You had just moved into the area after a disciplinary case in your hometown. You’d beat up another student who was bullying your friend, got expelled and moved out on your own after the fact. Cut ties with your family and everything.

Despite the general air of mystery around you, there was something about you that Sakura felt pulled him in. For some reason, you never triggered his fight or flight even when it was way easier to do it. For some reason you made him comfortable, always knowing his limits and rarely teasing him even for laughs.

An undeniable magnetism to you appealed to him a lot more than it repulsed him. )

Over the years, Sakura has mulled a lot over your relationship. How you approached him at fifteen with a cool, carefree attitude that left him uselessly infatuated against his will. How you took your time in getting to know him for years. Later, how you confessed. Roped him into the relationship so seamlessly that by the time things happened for real, Sakura felt totally unnerved by how inevitable—how deliberate you were about it right from the start. Something that occurred to him too late.

You’ve always been good at placating his many troubles too, even when you’re the cause of them. His lingering paranoia, his serious attitude, his inability to deal with compliments. You handle all of it with such grace it’s like those parts of him don’t even exist. Maybe it’s because you went through something similar to him, but you understand all of it well - though you dealt with it in the opposite way he does.

Your carefree acceptance has proved to have a good influence on him. He’s less anxious and more relaxed around you. He always feels like listening to you, and always does - and after dating for four years, he’s rarely mad about it.

Sakura always listens to everything you say because some part of him is conditioned too. His body does it instinctively, placing more trust in your words than he does in even himself. You’ve built that in him.

As troublesome as you can be, you’ve yet to lead him astray.

Embarrassing as it is, a long relationship has instilled a sense of obedience to you and his… love for you that runs deeper even than his intuition.

That’s why, when you tell Sakura to—

“Drink,”

—he does it without hesitation.

He drinks another cup of tea in one gulp before wiping the corner of his lip as you smile at him very briefly.

He no longer feels a clear sense of how much time has passed, despite the fact he’s currently very sober.

Cramped against the wall, Sakura’s head spins as you lean your weight against his other side and chat with Umemiya over drinks. An airy smile on your lips and gentle look in your eye. Damn you.

His chest heaves as the thick, warm air enters his lungs and stifles his already difficult breathing further. Dim lights overhead cast shadow underneath the table and only barely illuminate the topside well enough to see the remnants of a long night. Empty glasses, canisters of beer and shochu as well as a variety of small plates cleared of everything apart from stray crumbs littering its surface.

Around him, his loved ones part into small groups and chat amongst each other. Sakura has no idea what the topic of conversation is anymore. He hasn’t heard anything other than the sound of your voice in his head for an hour and hasn’t spoken up for the last thirty minutes. When someone tries to call him into conversation, he mumbles something before you speak for him and no one bats an eye at this for which Sakura’s fucking grateful.

It’s so hard to think of anything when his bladder feels this painfully full.

His head is filled with white noise, red flush crawling even further along his neck until it dusts along his nose - up to the ends of his ears. Under the table, your fingers drift subtly to his inner thigh and push inward. Sakura winces, biting back a pathetic little whimper and glaring at you weakly from the corner of his eyes.

This is torture.

You aimlessly draw something in his thigh with your fingers before smiling gently as you nudge another cup of lukewarm tea his way. Leaning in while your conversation partners are all distracted by ordering something else, you whisper into his ear. The light warmth of your breath makes him shake, painful pressure in his abdomen steadily increases as the liquid starts to travel down his throat. Your hand is careful as it slides underneath his black t-shirt and lightly grazes his skin. It’s dark enough to not be obvious. The dull ends of your manicured nails scratch lightly at the soft, lower swell of his belly before the pads of your fingers push hard into his core.

His body gives into the pressure, eyes widening with fear at the sudden sensation. He barely stifles a gasp before shooting you another mean look you easily ignore.

“Haruka,” You hand him his cup again, filled to the very brim with liquid. “Drink some more tea,”

He grits his teeth.

“Fucksake. I can’t��I can’t.”

You raise an eyebrow as your hand smooth down his thighs. Your lips quirk up into a smile so smug it nearly rocks him out of his anger.

“Is that right?”

A test. He’s always welcome to give up. He knows that. He knows that if he does you won’t hold it against him either. You want him to do it because he wanted too, always. He hates that about you.

Sakura grinds his teeth and takes a hold of the ceramic tea cup, knocking the lukewarm tea back in one go. Your expression morphs into something pleased and endeared from the corner of his eyes and his heart starts to flutter. He isn’t sure if he’s thankful or not for all the people around, for the environment.

It gives you free reign to lean even further into him and whisper the words he’s been desperately aching to hear all evening.

“Good boy,” You hum, careful and deliberate. A innocent kiss gets placed on his cheek, the lipgloss dampening his skin. “You’re being so, so strong.”

The words him melt him unwittingly. From the top of his head to the tips of his toes, the rush of affection threads through his nerves and unwinds his sense of danger further. Enough that he might slip completely. He has to hold it until the clock hits midnight. Just until then. You’ll take a cab home and Sakura will relieve himself finally, finally. It’s seventeen more minutes until he can go home and empty his bladder. He can’t screw up now.

This is the first time you’ve made Sakura hold in public. You’ve always been considerate enough to do it at home where the safety net of your mutual understanding and familiar bathroom are there even if he fails to keep it in. Even if he pissed himself in your living room or in your bedroom - it can be dry cleaned or tossed. Most of all there’s no one to explain it too.

In public it’s different. He could pretend that he’s drunk and while it wouldn’t be less fucking embarrassing - at least it’s understandable. Sakura is sure that’s part of the reason you chose a place like this do to attempt such a public play. To give him the out, just in case.

But regardless, the shame and humiliation of not being able to hold it in front of everyone he knows is a threat. It’s just so goddamn embarrassing. So horrible and awful. The anxiety makes his stomach churn but he can’t focus on a damn thing else.

He has to go. He has too.

He always whines about how much he hates this but you both know he doesn’t entirely mean it. It’s not that he likes this miserable sensation, as much as he likes how you get off on it. How sadistic it turns his unusually kind and light-hearted girlfriend.

You’ve always relished in Sakura’s shame like the freak you are. Pure pleasure on your face and absolute adoration as you watched Sakura break apart slowly and guide him through it with hushed whispers. Watching the light color of his jeans or joggers stain dark from wetness or watch him be jostle around enough to almost piss but not enough to give him actual relief. Teasing him until he trickles and makes his own boxers damp enough to be uncomfortable—to be cognizant of the fact he’s pissed himself helplessly while not being able to take care of it on his own. Not without your explicit permission.

You’ve done all sorts of play together. Usually, you have and indoor date and movie night where Sakura knocks back a few liters over of water over long few hours and gets increasingly desperate. And you get him hard during that, always sure to tease him until he’s just on the edge of wetting himself.

You always shower together afterwards. Yet, you don’t hesitate to touch Sakura’s soft, piss soaked cock with reverence either way. Quick to praise him, whether or not he’s failed or succeeded in holding it. Despite how shameful the whole thing is and how much he protested it at the start - some part of him deep, deep down can admit he sort of likes it. Or at least, he likes the pleasure he gets from you when you take the reigns.

It feels good, though he really resents even kind of admitting that. The relief from holding and holding and holding and then finally getting to let go is just as good every time. Pissing himself always feels good in the moment.

And you’re always so aroused by him after. He likes that way more than everything else being frank. Likes the way you get wet over his humiliation. Likes how softly you stroke and lick his cock when he’s all cleaned up, eyes lidded and full of pure love as he gets to cum too - another reward for holding in so well. He loves the warm whispers of good boy against his neck and shoulders when you finally sink down on his length and the way you feel when he holds you in his lap and buries his face into your shoulder.

All of that feels so much better when he does what he’s told and he likes listening to you. So even though it’s usually against his best interest in conditions like these - he bites his tongue and continues to drink until he feels like he’s sating your appetite, silently ignoring the ballooning in his bladder only getting worse with each pass of breath.

And he drinks, and drinks, and drinks until the clock hits midnight.

You’re deliberately brutal in the last seventeen minutes. In that time, you make Sakura down at least another half liter of liquid and continue to tease him all the way until the izakaya closes. He’s antsy by the time the night ends. His friends slowly disperse outside and go home in different directions until it’s just the two of you waiting for a taxi to come pick you up.

Sakura is counting the fucking seconds.

He needs to go, but he doesn’t want to piss himself in the taxi. His legs are crossed, shifting his weight anxiously as you hold his hand and smile plainly like nothing in the world is going on.

Another two minutes until the cab arrives, another twelve to go home. You hum to yourself as you reach your hand up and caress the back of his neck, palm brushing the trimmed hair and sliding slowly over his rapid pulse and flush skin. With no one around, you don’t bother hiding your intentions. You slide your hand just into the waistband of his black jeans, just above his soft cock.

His brows raise high as your eyes lock.

And then you push at that angle - push hard enough he feels a slight trickle. Not enough to stain his light-wash jeans, but enough that the fabric of his underwear is noticeably damp. Sweat forms at his temple from a mix of stress and shame - eyes screwed closed as he curses. He’s afraid to look at you but does anyway.

You’re smiling just as warmly as he thought you’d be. His voice cracks under the weight.

He thinks this is the hardest it’s ever been. The pressure is so much stronger when there’s stakes and Sakura is mildly horrified. And he has to go so bad, so bad he can’t think of anything else.

“Fucking—,” He crumbles, feeling shameful and red faced and lightheaded as he admits this to you with trembling lips and terrified eyes. “Dunno if I can make it home, I need to - “

You stand in front of him and push up slightly to kiss him. It’s a nice distraction. Your soft, sweet lips salve his nerves just a touch. You gaze up at him lovingly.

“It’s okay baby, promise. Home soon.”

The words of protest die on his lips. Despite being taller than you, Sakura finds himself feeling so incredibly small. So incredibly helpless and so, so dependent on you in that moment he hardly knows what to do with himself. It usually takes him longer to get like this. You’re the only that can bat for him if he really does wet himself. He’s doing everything you say, being obedient, chasing after the familiar high of the aftermath and it’s sinking him so deep into that headspace. He feels suspended in air.

He grips your hands a little tighter and you smile at him. His brows furrow.

“Wanna hold me a little baby? On the way home.”

He nods feeling as tender as ever and you nod back, kissing his temple.

“Mm. Good boy. It’s okay.”

He hides a whimper into your hair as he hugs you from behind, a light laugh leaving your lips when he does. Two minutes feels like two hours.

The taxi pulls up not long after. You open the doors for him and talk to the driver, giving him your address. Something plays on the radio that gets turned up to give you and Sakura some room as the driver makes way. It’s a short, short drive over to your apartment. Just seven minutes.

As soon as the driver steps on the gas, Sakura turns his gaze on you pleadingly. And you smile at him, shifting to lay a little against his chest. He buries his face against your shoulder in measured breaths as your other hand comes up to play with his hair.

“You’re extra whiny today,” You whisper without any malice. A doting edge to your words. “Can’t help it can you? We’re almost home, baby.”

Sakura bites back another whimper, mustering as much sense into his speech as he can though he hardly wants to talk. Hardly wants to think, either.

“So close, Haruka. Just a little more and then you can go.” You nudge him with your nose “Such a good boy.”

“So full,” The words come out hot, on a heavy breath as his hand grips your waist tighter. “Can’t—no more,”

“Shh,” You soothe. The shared affection between you looks like normal PDA through the reflection in the drivers mirror and it makes him feel even more self-conscious. “Three more minutes, Haru. A minute or two to walk in. Two minutes in the elevator, and another two to get the door unlocked. Nine minutes. You’ve held it for so long. I know you can hold it in a little longer.”

He grits his teeth and closes his eyes. “Tell me I’m good.”

“So good baby.” You nuzzle against the crown of his head. “So, so good.”

The next few minutes feel like a complete blur.

One more light until the driver pulls into the parking lot of your complex, politely wishing you goodnight before pulling away. Sakura nearly has to lean on you as you walk into the empty elevator and take the trip upstairs. His grip on your hand is tight as you lead him through the corridor, grips even tighter as you fish your keys out from your purse and unlock the door.

The sound of the lock undoing makes Sakura feel so relieved. You usher him in carefully, his thighs tight and knees nearly buckling from the pressure of his bladder. He’s so full it’s painful, so full it aches and it’s so much he can’t think about anything except that and how much he wants to be free from it. He's delirious and sweaty. He just needs to go so badly.

He tries to rush to the bathroom but jostling around while he walks doesn't work out well.

A looming sense of panic sets in immediately.. He knows what's coming instinctively - the uncontrollable relaxation on his muscles when his body has reached his limit. He looks up at you pleadingly, though he’s not sure what he’s even asking you for.

He can’t think. Barely moving as something starts to unfold inside of him, crashing into him all at once.

It’s obvious that he’d start to feel the urge to piss when he's comfortable at hom, finally in his own space but—

He shakes his head, looking at you with blown out eyes.

“I can’t,” He hiccups as he shuffles closer and closer to the living room, teary at his lashline Trying his best to get to the bathroom and failing. “Can’t make it to the—fuck, please, I can’t. It’s.—It’s gonna, I’m gonna -“

Your eyes widen in understanding as you crouch just at the entrance alongside him, petting his back.

“Oh sweetheart,” Your voice is the softest, sweetest sound he’s heard all night. “Poor thing. Shh, it’s okay baby. Let go. It’s alright, I promise. You did so good.”

Something in him...breaks. Shatters.

His eyes go wide before they blur with tears and piss leaks from between his legs unwittingly.

Sakura is reduced down to sobbing. His whole body shudders so hard, he’s knees buckling under the weight as the pressure finally stops. He can’t help but listen, even though he’s so, so ashamed of himself.

Fuck. Fuck, it feels so good.

Sakura finally, finally lets go. He crumbles under his own weight, shrinking down to his knees as he feels it soak through the layers in a hot rush between his legs. His clothes dampen and drench as he lets out long breaths. You card your fingers through his hair as he sobs through the endless stream. It feels like it’s never going to stop. He can’t open his eyes to look but he can feel the puddle forming underneath him, how it soaks into his jeans and shoes and makes them wet. How ashamed and humiliated he feels being completely unable to stop himself from wetting himself. It flows and flows and flows, testament to just how much he had to drink.

The entirety of his pant leg is soaked with his own piss and mess. Embarrassment makes him curl up as he’s unable to stop once he starts. It goes on for so long. But it feels so good to let it out. The sheer sense of relief is more of what’s making him sob than anything else.

Piss trickles down his legs as he heaves through deep breaths and short sobs. He feels your hands cup his face as you bend in a squat, unconcerned with the way it splashes against your shoes or tights. When he finally gets his vision back as you swipe his tears away, you’re looking at him with such reverence he wants to cry all over again.

“You did so good baby,” You praise, warming him. You kiss him on the lips first before brushing against the crown of his head. “So good. You’re so perfect. Let’s get you cleaned up, hm? Give you you your reward.”

He sniffles as he stares at you. “You’re such a damn pervert.”

You laugh a little. “Mm, that’s true. Sorry, baby.”

Clean-up is always less of a hassle then he expects it to be.

Maybe because you have a routine for it now, but it doesn’t take very long at all. You do most of the heavy lifting during it which only worsens the feeling helplessness Sakura has been experiencing for the last few hours. He doesn’t make any effort to get away or out from that headspace, though it dies down with time. The promise of a reward has been the only thing keeping him level for hours now and he’d be damned to let it all go to waste after he worked so hard.

After a long, warm shower and change of clothes - Sakura finally gets what he wants more than anything.

Affection and attention.

In the safety of your bedroom, Sakura feels particularly floaty as he holds you in your lap. Lazy and worn out, he nuzzles himself against your neck as he feels your naked torso squish against his. He’s too embarrassed to tell you verbally like this that he loves you and hopes the nuzzling does the job for him.

Your nails feel good on his scalp as you card them again through his wet hair. Your skin smells nice too, and you’re soft and warm. The mellow thump of your heartbeat soothes him as you shower him in endless praise. It’s usually impossible for you to do this. Only when he’s bone tired like this do you get the chance.

Too embarrassing to let you do it unless he’s worked hard for it like he did today.

Sakura feels his length slide against your pussy and lets out a soft noise. You’re always so wet during this kind of play. It makes him feel wanted in a way he finds cringeworthy and doesn’t dare voice. Still, he doesn’t mind the feeling - aimlessly sliding his hips up and against your slick folds with a huff.

You do him the favor of moving. Copying the gesture by sliding yourself up and against his cock without penetration. His fingers tighten on your hips, cock painfully sensitive as he whimpers. Pre-cum leaks from his tip, weepy and spent and red as he humps against you even harder - lost in the sensation.

“Wanna cum like this Haruka? Don’t need to ask permission.”

“Nghh.”

He nods wordlessly as you grind yourself down harder onto him. His tip passes over your clit enough times to make you sigh pleasantly, and that sound drives him over the edge. Thick ropes of white cum spills against your soft pussy as Sakura moans and shudders violently. Despite how close you are, he can’t help but feel like it’s not close enough.

Maybe you sense it, because you do him the favor of sliding yourself onto his half hard cock without so much as another word. It’s still not enough for him, but it sates him better than before at least. He wraps his arms around you hard and squeezes tight. Just for a little while.

He scowls a little as he looks up at you, sobering up enough to form a sentence after spending some time hugging you. “Have you cum yet?”

“Don’t worry about it, baby.”

“Shut up,” He replies with no bite and a scowl. Another flush crawls across his face. “I can make you feel good too.”

You raise your eyebrow.

“Sounds like you’re declaring war not trying to give me an orgasm. I’m glad I made you feel good though,” You add cheekily. He flusters immediately, instinctively getting aggressive but not wanting to shove you off of him even as you break out into a fit of laughter.

“Fuck off. I d-don’t feel good doing that weird shit with you. I only do it because - “

You interject. “Because you love me? That’s a better reason to you? How sweet Haru.”

He frowns deeply.

“Be quiet, you—don’t put words in my mouth, damn it.”

“Pfft, okay. I’m sorry. I hope I’m not pushing you too much.”

He huffs a little, pouting as he goes back to pressing his cheek to your skin. His voice is a touch softer than it was before.

“I don’t do things for bullshit reasons. Stupid.”

“I’m glad, then. Even so, you had a tough time today hm? So I’ll let you fuck me as much as you like. Just do whatever you feel like.”

“I wanna…return to the favor or whatever.” He says after thinking on it. “Just… wanna make you feel good too. Like….” His voice goes small “…You make me feel. Or whatever.”

You smile at him. He can feel it, not see it. He’s avoiding looking at your face since he’s sure you’re all goofy and loveydovey.

“The floor is all yours. No rush though okay? I like spoiling you and we’ve got all night.”

Sakura scowls, casting his gaze down at the bedroom floor. “….I love you.”

You smile and press another kiss to his head. He feels so content he wants to die. Your reply comes easily anyway.

“I love you too, Haruka.”

#piss cw #writing tag #sakura x reader #sakura smut #windbreaker x reader #windbreaker smut #tbh this is not worth tagging its simply too niche but who cares

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opal-owl-flight · 5 months ago

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can I ask about the poster "agent 3" kids story?

Yes you can and here it all is!! Presenting…

tldr: She comes from a family of big name actors in the industry, and shes been raised from hatching to continue their legacy. Its…a lot of pressure to put on a kid, especially one who just wants to make her (impossible to satisfy) family proud. Despite being surrounded by impossible standards, the fakest friends chosen for her, being given everything she can ever want (except what she really needs), and putting on a hundred masks for everyone in her life for survival’s sake in a cutthroat industry, she chooses to be kind.

more details under the cut!!

Her name is Sariwa, which means “fresh” . Named for her spring green tentacles and as a blessing from her parents that shed stay youthful, beautiful. a hope that she would be seen and be adored (as freshness implies coolness/popularity in sploonworld).

Shes hatched into the acting industry, with both parents being big in the industry. From hatching she was expected, trained to be an actor like her mother is. The media adores them, this “sweet little family”, but no one knows how nefarious everything is when the cameras are off.

The dad is neglectful, disappearing into meetings most of the time. The mom is a helicopter parent to make up for it. Pointing out every flaw that Sariwa apparently has in either performance or appearance. Never giving praise. Except when she performs “well enough” on stage. This instills in the child this need to make them proud. to…to make everyone happy. She becomes someone whose dependent on other peoples’ praise to function.

Shes given everything else, dont get me wrong. Every material thing she’ll ever need. all the big popular “friends” chosen for her. But…shes not allowed to turf. yknow. biggest event in an inkling’s life here in Inkopolis. and shes not allowed to go to school either. shes too busy memorizing lines for adverts or-

The second she turned 14, she was chosen as the lead role for Cuttlegear’s brand new show abt Agent 3. She looked exactly like the legendary hero, according to the sources. All her time went into this project. Thankfully, unlike at home…her co-actors were very kind. Her parents didnt choose for her this time. She was meeting actual people who dont put on masks beyond their job. the actor they got for Cuttlefish, in particular, is a very kind soul, defending her when the directors get too pissy with her performance. (Those are the only people she fears, tbh shes fearful of most authority figures.)

*Cuttlefish is also depicted as kind and supportive in the show. and in most games. Unlike the real Cuttlefish, which is kind of a loony old man who pushes ideas on young inklings. He still gives more support and kindness that 3s dad ever gave, but thats only RELATIVE to how little he gave in the first place. One can only imagine the longing this inspires in the real 3.

Sariwa…since shes hatched shes had to put on an act. Be the perfect little doll for her parents. For the world. But her friends here, they inspired her to…have fun with what shes doing again. To take off the mask (mostly beyond the clock). Breathe life in the character when she can. (But lets be real…shes getting 3 spot on with how many parallels they have with each others lives.)

But what is she beyond the mask, her role? She wasnt allowed to do anything beyond this. She was forced to depend on her abusive parents and their associates. She cant live alone beyond them. Not allowed to turf bc shes “a prim and proper young lady; above such violent drivel that only delinquents participate in”. They gesture to 3, whos one of the faces Squidforce uses in their promotions, and say (ironically.) that she must not become that. Face ripped to shreds and eye mangled.

No one knows they got that from the real war that Sariwa is pretending to show.

The show does its best to be an accurate telling. Child friendly, to a point. Horrifying things still get kept in somewhat. Things that will horrify a child on stage.

If Sariwa is terrified of the props, can you imagine how it was for 3?

————————

And once she realizes all of this. Once she gets out of this situation thanks to Callie, Marie, and 3 themself. Does she feel guilt? Guilt for depicting the horrors in a way that glorifies it instead? A part of a project that aims to make people complacent to the real horrors that churned below?

There is one thing Sariwa feels about 3, that I am aware of rn.

“Im glad, that out of every story I couldve told, Im glad it was yours.”

Just like 8, she sung this tale in her hearts. Just like 8, she used this to break out of this terrible situation, answering the call of the ones who promised her safety. A better life. Like the way she stage broke through that prop in the choreographed Octavio fight, she broke through the influence of those around her.

*She actually went off-script a bit in that scene. After she beat down Octavio, she held out her hand. Mostly to help the actor up. But then, without realizing, she spoke, she spoke of making things better between the nations. That maybe he doesnt have to steal the zapfish anymore.

Her time with the octoling actors, and hearing the stories from the ex-octarians, made her aware and know the fact that theyre people too. The directors kept it in. They knew that if they released this as they have planned it, there will be fuckign riots from the ex-octarians or the Inkling “sympathizers”.

She saw the value this story held, despite the subliminal messaging that she wished wasnt implemented. That she wished she wasnt a part of. She saw that its a tale of hope. A tale that inspires one to become the hero of their own life. A tale that inspires one to make the world a better place.

————————

So she was hatched and raised to make people smile, singing her songs and dancing their dances. Much like the clan singer that was 4, except the tradition is much more healthy compared to industry standard. And she didnt become as mean as the people around her, at least not internally. She put on a mean mask but she felt the void within. When she was given kindness for a long enough time, she put her walls down.

And just like the real 3, she underwent through the horrors of expectations she had to hold up, and trying to make uninterested parents proud. They dont see her as their daughter, shes just a means to an end. She had to wear a hundred masks to survive and it made her lose her sense of identity. She had to be mature, she had to take the shitty behavior of adults who expect her to be like one too. It made her lose grip of who she is beyond this role. Hell, they made her so dependent on their handouts that shes not sure she can exist beyond this hell. Much like how 3 struggles to know a life beyond their duty.

And much like 8, she used the story she was telling to break out and get herself in a better situation. She met with the real Agents 1 and 2 (without her knowledge) and asked. Begged. for help, after her show ended. (3 also kind of pointed the two in her direction. Bc cod knows how horrifying this industry is. Shes lucky she didnt get any of the grosser horrors ~~its bc I didnt feel comfortable writing such topics~~)

And then shes faced with the same problem all the real legends faced. What comes after the end? When the dust clears, what happens next? She wasnt given a damn choice, she wasnt allowed to try to learn things beyond this role. to be beyond an imagined agent 3. a soldier for the screen. who is she now, that shes out of that battlefield?

little does she realize that the real 3s asking the same question for themself.

#splatoon #splatoon oc #oc #character design #original character #opal owl’s nest #Cuttlegear isnt related to the NSS nor the Inkadian military in my interp — theyre history enthusiasts #btw yes uhh shes from a Phillippine inspired region!#or family who moved to Inkadia from there.

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kimi240302 · 1 year ago

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Come back to me Part 1

A/N: Before you read this, I want you to know that my native language is different. So I am very sorry for any mistake. Nevertheless, I hope you will like my story and enjoy it.

Summary: The love story between Alec Volturi and Y/N Swan, was an unexpected one. Both didn't know what to make of each other when they found out they were soul mates. But they worked on it and created a beautiful strong love that not even Bella's hatred for the Volturi could destroy. But as in any good love story, tragedy was impossible to avoid in theirs. It came as unexpectedly as their love itself, and made the Cullens and Bella seem to win, while Alec and the Volturi were losing their light in the darkness.

Alec Volturi x Swan!Female!reader

Main Post / Twilight Masterlist/ Come back to me Masterlist

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"I had all and then most of you Some and now none of you Take me back to the night me met I dont know what I´m supposed to do Haunted by the ghost of you"- Lord Huron/ The Night We Met

Helplessness or powerlessness

Alec didn't know exactly which feeling had been eating away at his insides every day for the past two months, or was it perhaps both? Ever since he'd gotten the call from the Cullen Doctor that the woman he loved more than anything in the world was on the verge of death, Alec had felt like he was in a freefall into darkness. He was not present and yet not absent enough to be able to shut off his emotions from the pain he felt all the time.

Lost in thought, he looked down at his mate and ran soothing motions over her hand that lay in his. Y/N was still lying in the hospital bed in the hospital room in the city that Alec Volturi had learned to hate even more in the last two months than he had hated it before, Forks.

He had not been told exactly what had happened to her, because no one knew for sure how Y/N had left the road with her car and ended up in the lake. There was no storm that evening, no wet or slippery roads or anything else that could have caused the accident. The rest of the facts were also just speculation. Y/N had managed to get out of her car, but the temperature of the water was too cold for her to have the strength to swim to the surface afterwards. She had lost consciousness and only survived by pure luck. This lucky charm was called Jacob Black. He and the other wolves had heard the crash and had run as fast as they could to the lake.

"I always thought that our twentieth birthday would be the only bad memory that would burn itself into my brain and never want to leave." Alec looked away from his sister and ran both hands over his face. He felt something he hadn't felt in several centuries, tiredness. The vampire would love nothing more than to lie down next to his mate, close his eyes and simply sleep away Y/N's absence. But he had long since lost this ability, something he had never regretted until this moment.

Jane, who was standing at the window, looked at her brother in shock. It was the first time she had heard him speak since Y/N's accident, she had come back to check on him every now and then and had never been able to get more than single words out of him. The second thing that shocked her was that she and her brother had never spoken about what had happened, not since they had both turned. Jane sat down in the chair next to Alec and looked at him searchingly. "I'll be honest with you, brother, I've forgotten exactly what happened. Either it was too long ago or my memories are trying to protect me." Alec turned to his sister in surprise. "Really? My memories want to torture me, in this case, I guess. I remember every little detail."

He fell silent for a few moments, turned his gaze away from Jane and looked through the window at the cloudy sky. He had to grin slightly. He hated this town and yet its weather seemed to know exactly how the vampire felt at that moment.

Alec noticed how his sister's gaze seemed to bore deeper into his side profile with every passing second of his silence. His gaze lingered stubbornly outward as he continued. "I remember how you, me and mother were eating dinner when the villagers kicked down our door. I remember them chasing us through the forest with flaming torches and insults. I remember how we were captured and dragged to the dock on the shore. How we were tied to a stake on a pyre and insulted further. I remember mom trying to get to us and fighting against the people holding her. I remember how she broke free. How they grabbed her just before the stake and pushed her to the ground. I remember how she was kicked by the people she had known since childhood. I remember her choking on her own blood." Alec turned his head back to Jane. "But you know what the worst memory from that day is?" The blond vampire shook his head. "The flames. I remember the pain and the smell of our skin burning off piece by piece."

There was an intense silence between the two siblings for a few moments.

"Since when do you remember every detail?" Jane's voice had changed to a soft tone that she only used with her brother and Y/N. Alec's eyes drifted to his mate, reflecting the pain of the last few weeks. "Since the day I saw her lying here like that. Since then, I can't get it out of my head that fate always manages to sweeten my life, only to ruin it afterwards." The black-haired vampire jumped up and walked over to the window. "Alec, Y/N is alive. Carlisle…" "The Cullen doctor, doesn't know if she's waking up. He doesn't even know if she'll ever be able to breathe on her own again without that machine." Alec ran his fingers through his hair again.

His gaze wandered to the machine that displayed Y/N's vital signs and beeped along with her heartbeat. He looked at the machine, from which a tube led into his mate's throat. Alec knew that if it wasn't for that tube, his lover wouldn't even be breathing. The vampire took a closer look at Y/N. Alec swallowed, because there was hardly anything left of the girl from two months ago. Her skin was white and stretched against her body so tightly that you could see every single bone. Her cheeks were sunken and black spots had formed under her eyes. Her hair looked dull as it had lost its shine.

"I should have kept her in Volterra and bitten her the first time we met. Then she wouldn't have had the idea to come back here." Jane stood up instantly and stood in front of her brother, drawing his gaze from his mate. She put her hands to her brother's cheek and looked deep into his eyes.

"Alec, if you had kept her in Volterra the day she was dragged into our world without any preparation and turned her against her wishes, do you really think Y/N would have fallen in love with you? Do you think she wouldn't have listened to the Cullens and seen you for the monster you are to that clan? She would have hated you for the rest of your immortal lives. You would never have been able to reach her." Sadly, Jane turned her gaze to Y/N and back to her brother. "If she doesn't survive this, which I hope she doesn't, at least you had a time together with her that you would want to remember. Y/N loved you and always will. Hold on to that Alec, I beg you not to lose hope now."

Alec let his head grow heavier in his sister's hands. "What if I bite her now…. Maybe I can end this nightmare." Alec lifted his head stepped away from his sister and began his pacing. "I should never have let her go to Forks. The Cullens and her sister don't care about her safety like me, you, or the rest of the Volturi!" His eyes wandered helplessly back and forth between his sister's face and the lifeless-looking body of his mate. The feeling of powerlessness spread through him again, drilling into his bones like a disease.

Jane shook her head. "Carlisle said that our poison might just kill her faster and you couldn't stop her from coming to Forks. After all, she wanted to say goodbye to her father. You know she wouldn't have been able to see her father after her transformation." "Then I should have gone with her…" "Alec, you can't undo what happened. So stop blaming yourself." "I can't lose her Jane, I can lose anyone but her." Jane nodded knowingly. "I know Alec." She whispered. Alec stopped and accepted his twin's embrace. He tightened his hands in her top and lowered his head into the crook of her neck.

They were both there when their master Marcus lost his mate and how he was broken by it. They also saw how he suffered every day. Jane didn't want her brother to suffer the same fate. That's why she had taken the message that Y/N wanted to be turned very well. That way, the young girl would be out of the danger of being human. But ever since the call had arrived in Volterra saying that Y/N was on the brink of death, the thought that Alec could end up like Marcus was a shadow of every action the siblings had taken. Jane couldn't lose her brother and even if the blonde vampire didn't want to admit it, the same was true for Y/N. For the young girl had burned herself into her cold, non-beating heart. Jane also knew that it wasn't just her, but every single vampire who lived in Volterra.

Y/N had earned the nickname "The Sunshine of the Volturi". Because no matter how many prejudices the Cullens and her sister had tried to put into Y/N to turn her against the Volturi. The young woman had created her own images of each individual vampire, which placed her in a special role for each one. For the three kings and their wives, she became a daughter, someone they all wanted to take under their wing and show everything the world had to offer. To Felix, Demetri, Santiago, Afton, Chelsea and Jane, she became a sister. For the rest of the Volturi guard, she became a friend. For Alec, she became his companion, the love of his life and his best friend. What united the Volturi was one thought when it came to Y/N; they all wanted to protect her, whatever the cost.

Alec detached himself from his sister completely, walked around her and sat back down by his mate's bed.

"I'm so sick of this hospital room." He murmured. Carefully, Alec reached for Y/N's hand and clasped it with both of his. Slowly, he brought it to his mouth so he could leave a kiss on her fingers. Alec cursed his vampire existence at that moment, more than on other days. Because she had taken away his ability to cry. All he could utter was a silent whimper. Alec carefully placed Y/N's hand back on the mattress. He leaned towards the bed so that he could place one of his hands on her cheek while the other stroked tenderly through her hair. His eyes clouded over with pain.

"Did you know that you are so important to the Volturi that even the kings themselves were here to see you? Although Master Aro could see you through Demetris or through someone else, all three wanted to see it with their own eyes." He paused for a few seconds. "I think by now every Volturi has been here once. Your sister and the Cullens throw a fit every time they see another one of us." Jane quietly sat back down in her old seat and watched her brother closely. He removed his hand from her cheek and placed it on Y/N's hand.

"What I want to say to you, my Love, everyone misses you and everyone prays, I don't know to what or to whom, that you will open your eyes and brighten our lives with your light again. Volterra is so cold and dark without you. I miss you, so terribly that I can't even describe it anymore." Alec bit his lips and squinted his eyes. Jane placed her hand over Alec's and Y/N's. "Y/N I beg you come back to me, don't leave me behind in this world."

Jane opened her mouth to say something reassuring, but she was startled and looked down at the hand she had placed on her brother's and Y/N. Alec's eyes snapped open too, his movements in Y/N's hair stopped.

"Tell me you felt that too! Tell me I'm not going crazy Jane!" Jane just looked stunned at their joined hands and then at Y/N's face. "Alec…" Alec took his eyes off the hands and looked at his sister. She pointed at Y/N with her free hand, "Look!"

Y/N's eyelids twitched slightly and all hell broke loose.

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@rosedpetal @bofadeezs

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mxqdii · 1 year ago

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matt sturniolo headcannons

pairings: matt sturniolo x reader

summary: headcannons!

warning(s): mentions of mental health, fluff

not proofread

matt would def be the type of boyfriend to just ALWAYS be touching you, like i know it's said, but it is very true. his hand is either on your thigh, his fingers interlocked with yours, or just touching you in some way.

if theres any insomniacs here or just in general people who have trouble sleeping, matt would be there awake with you playing with your hair until you fall asleep.

if you're anxious or if anything is bothering you, you dont even have to tell matt and he just knows. i feel like he would definitely have you studied, the way you act when you're uncomfortable, the way you act when you're sad, everything.

pet names. matt is a big user of pet names, i can picture him calling his partner "baby" and "love" the most, but a few sweetheart and beautiful's would slip out.

long conversations are a definite.

you would be having a bad day and just see matt and break

"baby what happened? talk to me."

"its okay, you're okay." he says stroking the back of your head

you two would very much lean on each other when needed, he would have bad days and just times where he would be more quiet, and all he wants is to be near you.

this is very controversial but in my opinion i feel like matt wouldn't be completely against pda. in public there would be hand holding, short and sweet pecks, etc. nothing too crazy but i know he wouldn’t just stop touching you the minute you two leave the house.

in private though? this man is so clingy. kisses everywhere, always cuddling, his hand on your thigh, hugs, etc.

you in the car vids and vlogs (if you're comfortable with that.) occasionally sitting in the front with matt if you survive the war for it with chris.

chris always making jokes on how you're a home wrecker and how you stole his bf (he loves you though)

you taking care of sick matt and them him spreading his sickness to you the next week, getting each other sick has happened on multiple occasions.

can get VERYY jealous and/or overprotective, jaw WILL be clenched and he'll either get quiet or possessive.

you, matt, nick & chris have sleepovers in the living room and watch movies together, you always end up seeing pictures of you and matt cuddling when you wake up.

holidays with matt are unforgettable. this boy would always get such perfect gifts for you every. single. year.

i see a lot of fics where matt cheats on the reader, but being honest... he would never. matt loves his s/o too much to hurt them and i just cant picture him cheating or playing somebody.

now what would happen is matt being too scared to admit his feelings for you, !!!!mutual pining!!!! is a definite. (unless u bold)

speaking of mutual pining, tropes for a matt relationship would definitely be friends to lovers. like growing up with the triplets then falling for matt.

if you're also a youtuber he would appear in your videos constantly, AND would help you film whenever you need.

he finds it so adorable how much you love his tattoos, i saw someone write a blurb saying reader would color in his tats and i ADORE that idea so much.

him watching you look so focused as you use the colors on his arm, tucking your hair behind your ear when it falls, smiling non stop, etc.

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mymoshangthoughts · 29 days ago

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oki i know we've all just chosen to accept that beatings are a part of demon mating culture and like, i dont think thats 100% wrong, but also thinking about linguang-jun's reaction to seeing shang qinghua beaten at the ascension incident, im kinda hesitant to fall into it 100%

oki my biggest defense for it being a demon-culture thing is that sha hualing didn't show any disagreement when mobei jun suggested "three beatings a day" in that particularly hilarious conversation, but that's honestly pretty thin. we know that she loves binghe and she never makes any attempt to fight him or to have him fight her. if anything, she strives to avoid it

there's also the possibility that the 'beating' that linguang-jun witnessed the conclusion of was a particularly unromantic one via demon standards. he saw shang qinghua and said "oh you were clearly displeased with him" so mayyybbee there's something to the pattern of bruises that speaks to intent but again, that's pretty thin

so might i suggest, from my humble little insane brain, that rather than beatings being a demon-culture thing, mobei jun is just fucking weird

oki bear with me oki but i rlly like this idea a lot LOL

im not even saying that mobei jun is a sadist (altho def not opposed to that), im saying that my socially awkward icy demon lord just straight up has no good concept of how to get the attention of his intended and this is sincerely his best effort. there's no research, no demon custom, no human custom, it's just mobei jun desperately screaming "look at meeeeeee pleaaassseeee" in his own extremely unique way that fucking no one understands

i would defend that this is likely due to his fucked up childhood and trust issues. like maybe linguang-jun isolated him to such an extent that mobei-jun winds up relatively divorced from his own culture for courting and doesnt even fucking know the first thing about it. maybe he has some twisted history of "look the only time i was shown affection was during martial training, which were basically beatings, so beatings = affection, yeah?" or maybe he's just so stupid and desperate that he has no fucking idea and no real plan, he's just trying to get shang qinghua's attention by any means necessary

i sort of like a mixture of all of the above. like linguang jun was the only person who showed him more typical signs of affection, and that was the prelude to betrayal. so mobei jun doesnt trust those types of affectionate gestures. but when he received martial training, either from his uncle or in one of the handful of times he'd seen his father, it was at least useful. like he can remember getting beaten and know there was an honesty to it. beating him made him stronger, being strong helped him to survive, it was the truest affection he's received in his life. and look, mobei jun hasn't exactly put all of that together all of that in as many words, but the effect is long lasting. and not all of shang qinghua's beatings were out of affection either. ultimately, there's this suspicious as fuck cultivator who's groveling at his feet and mobei-jun isnt exactly keen on humanity to begin with. and with shang qinghua prone to more typical shows of affection, the way his uncle was before the Betrayal? he's not going to be tricked again! he'll beat the human into submission to prove that he's strong and he's not a small defenseless child anymore who can be so ruthlessly abandoned! but then he really does start to develop feelings for shang qinghua and really does want his attention and qinghua simply wont look at him. sure, he'll throw out a million words of groveling and acting pathetic, but what does any of that even fucking mean?! does qinghua only see him as a king? does qinghua even see him as that or is he waiting for a chance to betray him? how can he get shang qinghua's attention? how can he keep him? and so he thinks about his only fond memories of 'affection' and starts the habit of beating qinghua lightly three times a day. it's gotta work. it totally has to work. it MUST be working, bc qinghua just told the demon emperor that acting pathetic is a way of showing affection!!! SO CLEARLY QINGHUA MUST LOOK AT HIM NOW RIGHT?!!? but their relationship just doesnt seem to be progressing and after the qinghua saves him from falling, mobei jun now has a brand new "height of being show affection" memory to cling to but its... very much the opposite of his memories of being beaten. and a whole lot better too. being caught by shang qinghua and protected in that way has his heart thudding every time he remembers it and suddenly beating qinghua has lost its appeal. how can he do something for qinghua that matches that feeling??? because now it feels poultry to offer qinghua mere beatings when those barely even seem enjoyable for qinghua anyway??? and he doesnt particularly enjoy qinghua acting pathetic for him either, even if he knows theres affection behind the gesture, and qinghua always acts extra pathetic during beatings so thats another reason to lay off. so mobei jun is in the middle of contemplating this shit and stops beating qinghua so much when suddenly its time for his ascension ceremony and he drags qinghua there with him and now qinghua is talking about leaving him and mobei jun's heart just about shatters. is it because he laid off on the beatings? is it because qinghua was always planning to betray him, the way he always feared? is it because mobei jun misread this whole thing? in front of his dead fathers door, a man who never gave much of a fuck about him, while anticipating the arrival of his horrible uncle, vulnerable and reminded of every reason he's never trusted traditional shows of intimacy and so he tells qinghua to fuck off, beats him without any affectionate intentions, and greets his uncle in heartbroken misery. but then qinghua COMES BACK WHEN HE NEEDS HIM and he apparently always hated the beatings which is a blow but also now QINGHUA IS LEAVING HIM AGAIN AND THIS IS HELL, MOBEI IS IN HELL RN.

and not to mention, he witnessed linguang-jun beating shang qinghua and suddenly, he doesnt even know why he ever thought beatings were all that affectionate either because this is horrible and he hates it and mobei jun is Not Equipped To Cope With Guilt, it's not something he's been trained in and he is not coping with ANY of this well tbh, not his uncle, not his heartbreak, and he just wants the familiarity of shang qinghua's normal pathetic behavior. something normal. something to ground him. but shang qinghua is not normal right now and he's still planning to LEAVE and mobei jun is all panic, no thoughts. and now shang qinghua is saying shit like "you only beat me cuz i was easy-going and weak" and ow? that hurts? and then shang qinghua is saying he was only ever indulging mobei jun and OW? THAT HURTS?! and mobei jun is prideful and in pain and upset so he's relying on familiar emotions. being angry. being prideful. being haughty. pretending he has any control over this situation. unsure how to act outside of their normal dynamic. unsure how to respond to this very different side of qinghua. but no matter what he says, qinghua is leaving. qinghua pinches his cheeks and insults him and calls him spoiled even when he's seen directly how his own uncle treats him and calls himself his father in front of the room where his father lies dead and yeah, it hurts when qinghua pinches his cheeks. not just the physical pain, but the knowledge that qinghua wants to hurt him. that hurts most of all and it's pathetic but mobei jun's head is swimming with the knowledge that maybe violence was never a good idea between them but what else can he do in this situation? he's completely out of his depth! so he threatens qinghua not to leave and he still LEAVES

so now he's trying to find qinghua and the entire time his mind is a complete mess of emotions because was he wrong all this time and qinghua cannot be gone, thats unacceptable, and what can he offer to make qinghua stay? how can he possibly not lose this person?? and the best he can think of is to let qinghua hurt him in return, let him get his licks in, and maybe that will help

but shang qinghua doesnt hit him when offered and qinghua seems a bit scared of him and for the first time ever that seems kinda fucking awful and mobei jun is out of his depth, but the warmth he feels when shang qinghua wont hit him is really... something. and maybe theres a lot more shows of affection he should be learning, like the feeling when someone could hit you but chooses not to. and look, he's starting from abysmal standards. and yeah, when shang qinghua suggests he cook for him that sounds weird and demeaning and mobei jun instinctively wants to turn it down

but when he thinks about how it might be a way to show affection that they both appreciate, he's really determined to see it through

anyway thats a verrrryyyyy long over-explanation as to why i dont think the beatings are demon culture, i think mobei jun is just a terminally awkward traumatized weirdo who doesnt know how to communicate

#moshang #shang qinghua #mobei jun

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sweetcherriexs · 23 days ago

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die; b.e.

Ever feel like you’ve done absolutely nothing right in your life? Like anything you did, said or thought was wrong. You couldn't ever do anything right. Like you were never meant to feel okay. Like every single thing you’ve ever accomplished was… out of pure pity from God?

It’s the worst fucking feeling.

You can’t be dead because that’s unfair to people who love you. You can’t be dead because you’d seem pathetic. You can’t be dead because you’re a fucking coward.

But you can’t exactly be alive either because why the fuck did you exist? Like genuinely… why on earth were you born? If only to suffer and suffer until you finally break down and crumble.

You’re too selfless for your own good but you’re also the most selfish person on earth. You don’t deserve the love you receive. You don’t deserve anything good because the moment you have it, it’s right in your hands and then your drop it, scrambling to catch it but you’re too late and now it’s broken and you’ve lost it.

No one believes you when you tell them you’re a bad person. No… how could they? You’re so sweet, aren’t you? So loving and sweet and kind, huh?

But nobody sees or hears the thoughts in your head. God you’re a horrible person. You fuck up everything, every good thing coming your way because you too damn desperate to be loved. But you don’t get it, do you? Nobody will ever love you. You’ll always doubt every ‘I love you’ said to you. You’ll never feel the love that is given to you and it rips you apart from the inside out but there is nothing you can do.

You’ve given up. There is no escape. Only acceptance that you’re broken. And you can’t be fixed. But do you even want to be fixed? Do you want to be okay? Will anyone care when you’re finally okay? Will you be able to love as hard when you’re okay?

Will you want to live? Will you be able to confidently admit that you don’t want to take your last breath? You don’t know and it scared you.

Maybe you’re getting worse and worse on purpose. You’re doing this to yourself so you get attention from people that are just trying to survive. God, why can’t they just hate you? Hate you so you don’t have to explain the mess that is in your head. It’s such a dark place and most of the time you just wanna take a gun and pull the trigger. God, it would feel so good. To you…

But what about the people you’ve fooled? What about them? How will they know your true self? Who you really are and what’s really going through your mind every second of the day.

There were so many times you’ve thought you’re getting better, but, no, it was just another person your heart longed for that you've fooled because they cared…. They loved you and-

“Hey, babe”

Your head shot up from staring at the ground, your fingers stopping their fidgeting on your lap as you’re met with your girlfriend’s eyes staring at you.

“You okay?”

You stayed silent for another second before breathing out. “Yeah uh… I’m fine”

Billie swallowed harshly at your vague answer and pursed her lips. “Mrs. Harris called” She mumbled, sitting beside you on the sofa with a sigh. “Said you haven’t been going to your sessions”

You took in a sharp breath then looked at her. “Yeah… I don’t need them”

She looked at you with soft eyes and you wanted to puke. PLEASE PLEASE DONT FUCKING PITY ME. Your throat closed up and you looked away from her, squeezing your hands into fists.

“Baby…” Billie starts but you cut her off.

“I can’t be fixed, Billie. I’m past fucking repair” You muttered harshly “honestly I don’t even know why you care!”

Billie straightened up at your words with a frown on her face. “The fuck? I care because I love you!” You let out a loud scoff at her words and shook your head. “What? What now?” Billie grumbled.

“You don’t love me! You say you do because you want me to be okay but I’m never gonna be okay! I don’t want to be okay!”

Billie froze, staring at you with disbelief etched on her face.

“Just go! Leave me before I rope you into my endless hurt and suffering!”

“Baby, I’m not gonna-”

“I said fucking go!” You shouted, bringing your knees up to your chest and curling into a ball and you screwed your eyes shut.

Billie pressed her lips together as she looked at you. She felt her chest tighten and her eyes watered. She moved closer to you. “Don’t do this…. You’re gonna be okay, okay? I’m here, my love” She placed a head on your back and your whole being broke at the soft touch, sobs rocking your body. “Sh sh sh” She shushes you gently, grabbing your shoulders and bringing you to face her.

“I know, baby, I know. It hurts I know, don’t listen to those thoughts, okay? Just feel my love for you” She murmured, bringing you to her chest as she stroked your back. You sobbed and gripped her shirt in your hands.

“I–.. d-don’t-.... deserve—..”

Billie soothed you once more, pressing her lips to the crown of your head as her own tears fell on your hair. “Don’t say that. Please don’t say that” She whispered, her voice breaking as she held your shaking body in her arms. “I love you, I love you so much” She lets out.

And though she said it… you couldn’t believe her. You wanted to. Oh if only anyone knew how bad you wanted to but you just couldn’t. It hurt your chest and you couldn't breathe.

She doesn’t care

She doesn’t love you

She hates you

God she hates you so much

She wants you gone

You're a burden to her

A broken thing she has to take care of

You should just kill yourself

You shouldn’t be alive

You don’t deserve this beautiful life

You don’t deserve her care

You don’t deserve her love

Why can’t you just die?

#billie eilish #billie eilish x reader #billie eilish x y/n #ദ്ദി(ᵔᗜᵔ)#billie eilish x you #billie eilish fanfiction #billie eilish fluff #billie eilish x female reader #billie eilish x #billie eilish fic #billie ellish lyrics

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ihavemanyhusbands · 9 months ago

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Revenge is a Dish Best Served Bloody

PART THREE: VIOLENT DELIGHTS

Part One // Part Two // Mini-Series Masterlist

Also on AO3

Pairing: Cooper Howard/The Ghoul x Fem!Bounty Hunter!Reader

WC: 4.9k words

Chapter Summary: The climax, in more than one sense of the word. Justice is finally served, and all the other pieces fall into place.

Warnings: MINORS DNI, THIS FIC IS 18+, canon typical violence, some descriptions of blood and gore, arson, drug use (chem called Buffout), implied mutual pining, smut, fingering, unprotected p in v (dont do it at home), radiated creampie (there’s RadAway dw lol), dirty talking, dom/sub dynamics, multiple orgasms, aaaaaaaaaand that’s all i can think about rn but lmk if i missed anything!

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Sounds in the middle of the night, a distant clamor that sharpened into voices as you regained consciousness. You sat up, disoriented and wide-eyed. The ghoul crouched nearby, immediately alert, hand on his holster.

“What’s–”

He put a finger to his lips, fixing you with a glare and a slight shake of his head. Dread immediately curdled in your stomach. Ever so slowly, you lifted yourself onto a crouch, grabbing your crossbow.

Moonlight faintly filtered through a window caked with years of dirt and grime. The near complete darkness made the shadowed objects around the room morph into ominous, bulky shapes, exacerbating your fear. There was a momentary silence, in which both of you stayed still, listening.

The two of you had holed up for the night on the top floor of another dilapidated building. It sat on the outskirts of what used to be Shady Sands, a town that had been re-bombed years prior. The risk of running into trouble was much higher, as there was a lot more foot traffic. There was still plenty to scavenge, after all.

And not only did you have to worry about mutants or raiders, but also knights of the Brotherhood of Steel. One of their bases was closer than you’d like, and you’d heard the rumble of their choppers in the distance while you skirted the enormous crater where the city once stood.

According to the ghoul, you were only a few days away from Axl’s main compound. Without either of you acknowledging it, you’d slowed down the pace. The moments of silent companionship stretched like lingering summer sunsets, and yet somehow, they were still not long enough. At times, you even felt the same way you’d felt at the outcrop, bordering on serene.

It seemed surreal that your destiny was just within reach. Though you had been preparing for years, letting grief and rage carry you through even the toughest obstacle, you felt hesitancy for the first time. A part of you did not want to face the stark reality of it quite yet, not knowing how things would go down once you got to your destination.

It wasn’t necessarily that you had a fear of death – you lived so closely with it that you didn’t flinch at its inevitability. Only at its abject cruelty; The way it striked indiscriminately, with disregard for those left behind.

What you worried about was living through the whole ordeal and coming out the other side alone. The ghoul had no fealty to you, much less… attachment. You’d fooled around a couple more times throughout the journey, but it was all carnal pleasure – a lesson that your body was not just an instrument of brutality and survival. You’d let yourself become soft and pliable, like putty in his hands.

But that wasn’t to say he was tender, necessarily. There’d been no kisses between you – though you sought them in earnest – and he had not yet taken you, as he put it. His biting remarks weren’t nearly as sharp anymore, though, and you’d caught him being more protective of you. Not to mention, he always made sure you were never lacking RadAway.

For your part… You thought it was gentleness you felt, though you still couldn’t quite put a name to the way you were feeling. Perhaps just comfort was enough to describe it, interestingly enough.

Barks of laughter sounded a little clearer, reminding you of the situation at hand. A few crashes followed, like things were being thrown about. It definitely sounded like they were inside the building, you realized with growing terror. How close were they? And how many of them?

“I should go give these visitors a warm welcome, don’tcha think?” the ghoul whispered, unholstering his gun. “It’s only polite.”

“Don’t you mean we?” You whispered back.

“No, y’ain’t comin’ with. I don’t need you getting in the way,” he said as he stood up. “Not many places to hide up here, so you best start lookin’.”

“You can’t just make m–” You started to protest, also standing up, but in two silent strides, he was right in front of you, holding your chin firmly.

For the briefest second, he seemed to be debating something. His eyes searched yours as if he would find the answer there. Another crash, most likely on the floor just below, and his lips thinned into a grim line as he made up his mind.

“Listen…” he said, no time to waste. “The name’s Cooper. Holler it if you need help. Keep an eye out, but don’t let anyone see you.”

With that, he let go of you and slipped out of the room, not looking back once. You stood there for a moment, dumbstruck, his name rattling around your head like a pinball.

But you had to shake yourself out of it, quickly scanning your surroundings for a place to hide. He’d been right about there not being many options, but you hadn’t realized there were virtually none at all in that room.

Except… there was a broken window on the far wall, and you avoided stepping on shards of glass as you made your way over. Right outside, there was a rusted fire escape, ladders leading up and down.

You leaned out of the windowsill and looked up at the night sky, spotting the big and little dippers. It was lucky that the moon was almost full, not leaving you completely blind. You swung one leg over the windowsill and begged the stars – anything up there that could be listening – that the fire escape didn’t collapse under you.

It groaned slightly as you lowered yourself onto it, making you wince, but thankfully it was pretty sturdy. Still, you tried not to think too much about the height, stifling the vertigo that threatened to creep in. It was then that you heard yelling, accompanied by a barrage of gunshots. You felt a sharp pang of worry for Cooper, but you knew he could hold his own.

Out in the open, you were even less safe, but while you couldn’t really see anyone down below, you knew better than to descend. So, you used the more precarious ladder to ascend instead. Muscles tense as it shook and rattled, your palms sweating, but it held your weight.

Breathlessly hauling yourself onto the rooftop, you first made sure you were alone before lying on your stomach near the edge, crossbow ready. The scuffle continued below, and you hoped all the noise didn’t attract even more unwanted guests.

Time seemed to take a liquid form as you waited, slipping through your grasp unnoticed, your focus on the unrelenting night. The animal instinct to survive had kicked in, blocking out your fear and slowing your heartbeat down.

Your father’s patient voice was at the back of your head. “Remember, when it comes down to it, calm and focus is what it takes. You’re more likely to make a mistake otherwise, a deadly one.”

Suddenly, a whistle rang out – a high note shortening into a low one. You didn’t move at first, but then you adjusted your position slightly to try and get a better look at the source. A head poked out of the broken window below, and your finger was instantly on the trigger.

Cooper raised his hands in mock surrender, an amused, sly grin on his face. Your muscles immediately relaxed as you exhaled the breath you’d been holding.

“Jus’ me, cowpoke,” he drawled. “It’s clear now. Get your ass down here before I come get you.”

You found yourself smiling with relief as you put your weapon away, climbing down the ladder with less care than when you were going up. You stumbled into him as you dropped back onto the fire escape, losing your balance.

“Woah, easy there,” he said, steadying you but keeping you close. “Y’really missed me that much, darlin’? I was only gone for an hour.”

You shoved away from him, rolling your eyes. You noticed he was splattered with blood, some having transferred onto your clothes. None of it seemed to belong to him, though, which was another small relief.

“How many?” You asked, deflecting his question.

“Too many for my likin’, and y’know I like myself a crowd,” he said. “Most of ‘em had Axl’s brand, others seemed like newbies. Fuckin’ amateurs, all of ‘em.”

You swallowed with bitter distaste as you heard that name. Surely the death of a group of his men wouldn’t go unnoticed, so that meant you had less time to make a move. The two of you had discussed some plans of attack, but you hadn’t chosen any course of action yet.

You thought of the bottles of Buffout you’d scored in Filly, unbeknownst to him. You’d gotten them as a last resort, not stupid enough to believe the two of you would be able to take on a whole compound of raiders just as you were.

You crossed your arms over your chest. “What now?”

“We loot ‘em, and then we get a move on as soon as dawn comes.”

“No rest for the wicked,” you sighed, even if you were no longer tired.

“Ain’t that the truth,” he chuckled. “But you were a good girl tonight, listenin’ to my orders.”

You bit down a grin and climbed in through the window so he couldn’t see the flustered look on your face. He checked the hallway as you gathered the rest of your stuff, and then you followed him out of the room, unable to stop the warmth spreading in your chest.

“Cooper?” You whispered, barely wanting to disturb the silence. “Thank you, again.”

Silence hung for a moment, and you thought he wouldn’t respond at all.

“That’s twice now,” he said, glancing over his shoulder at you. “Don’t think I’ll forget your debt after all this.”

That warmth exploded into fireworks and oh, you knew you were doomed either way.

—-----------------------------------

The compound was larger than you’d imagined, visible from a great distance. As soon as you’d crested the hill, you’d felt like a stone dropped into your stomach. The sun had set an hour ago, so the cover of darkness was to your advantage. No turning back now.

But before Cooper could take another step forward, you grasped his arm without thinking. He frowned as he looked down at your hand, then up at your face.

“Y’ain’t havin’ second thoughts, are ya?” He asked. “Little too late for that nonsense.”

You shook your head. “It’s not that, it’s just… maybe we need to reassess our strategy before we do anything hasty. I could use some more rest, too and–”

“Quit it,” he snapped. “What’s the matter with you? You anxious?”

How could I not be? You thought to yourself. You were braced for a fight, itching for it, even. It had made sleeping impossible the previous nights, no matter how much Cooper had tried to force you to rest. The constellations in the sky seemed to brighten the closer you got to the compound; Guiding the way, granting you strength.

But you wanted one more moment with him, just as you were then. So you gave into foolishness, pulling him in as you stood on your tiptoes to bring your lips to his. He flinched, surprised, gripping you in return. You were ready for him to shove you away, but when he didn’t, you placed a hand on his chest.

His lips were chapped, but not unpleasant. Warm, too, and set firmly at the first delicate brush of your lips. You heard a grunt low in his throat as he felt the tip of your tongue swiping at his bottom lip, coaxing, and it was then he snapped out of his shock.

The way he kissed you was rough and hungry, with a certain desperation you knew he would never admit out loud. Your tongues tangled, exploring each other’s mouths – though, truly, his was dominating yours. He gripped your hair, keeping you from escaping, even if it was the last thing you wanted to do.

But before you could get too deep into the kiss – reaching another point of no return – he pulled back, searching your face. Felt fire in his loins as he saw the glazed look of desire in your eyes, but he had to bat it away for the time being.

“Should’ve jus’ said you were needy,” he murmured. “But then again, you always are.”

A faint smile at his teasing, but he noticed the turmoil beneath. “Cooper...”

He let go of you, sobering up and slipping back into his usual prickly demeanor. The times called for it after all; He knew you needed that strength, too. He cleared his throat and glanced back at the compound, trying to think. An idea suddenly came to mind, and he couldn’t help a lopsided grin.

“I say we burn the whole place to the ground,” he said, tilting his head towards it. “And when they’re runnin’ around like chickens with their heads cut off, I’ll carve you a path towards him in the chaos.”

You froze, eyes widening, momentarily unsure of what to say. “I thought you said you had business with him, too.”

He shrugged, looking away. “You’ll settle the score for the both of us.”

The enormity of this statement — this unspoken gift — rocked you to your core, making you take an involuntary step forward. You thought to reach out to take his gloved hand, a rare sob clogging your throat, but you knew it would ruin the moment.

You would find a way to thank him later, when all was said and done.

—————————————

It was both fortunate and unfortunate that the raiders had stocked up on so much fuel. To them, it was most likely a precious commodity. To you, well… It was merely a means to an end — A conveniently deadly one.

In the darkest hour of night, Cooper had slipped into the encampment, silent as a shadow. You decided to knock back some Buffout and wait for the mayhem to start. He’d told you to stay hidden until the fire had really taken, but you were already bouncing around impatiently, starting to feel the effects of the chem.

The sharp tang of the fuel reached you in the breeze, and you clasped the handle of his machete with a white knuckled grip. Though you had weapons, he’d insisted you carry it, just in case. It brought you some comfort to have it, as if it was an extension of him.

In the distance, there was the sound of a small explosion. You jumped, but didn’t make a move yet. Those within the encampment started to rise, their voices confused and alert. Every single one of your muscles were poised to run, your senses screaming at you to spring forward. Pupils fully dilated, mind sharper than ever. You briefly wondered if that was how prey drive must feel. Buffout’s no fucking joke.

Instead, you slowly skirted the perimeter, keeping to the shadows. The voices raised and beneath them, there was the dragging hiss of fire igniting, catching hold of everything in its path.

Another explosion, this one much closer, if the subtly trembling earth was any indication. And so commenced the cacophony of chaos, though there was one word among the screams that you were able to distinguish – Ghoul!

The fire was rapidly spreading, so much so that you could feel its incandescent heat, sweat beading all over your face. Show time. You sprang up from your haunches and scurried to the nearest opening.

Things were blurry from then on. You had more than a few close brushes with certain death, but every time, without fail, a whizzing bullet would be your salvation. But that wasn’t to say your machete went unused, blood spattering you like a warrior’s anointing.

Axl’s main quarters were, unsurprisingly, harder to break into. Cooper took care of it, disposing of the raiders that were guarding their leader. The room was cramped with all sorts of loot, including hundreds of caps, perhaps more. Weapons, as well, and not to mention an assortment of Chems.

Axl himself was a large man with long, wild hair that was streaked with grey. He was wearing armor made of scraps and he was riddled with scars, one of his eyes missing. The one remaining glared at the two of you – just as mean mugged as you remembered – but he only seemed to recognize Cooper.

“Surprised to see me?” Cooper said, grinning easily. “Suppose you were so cocksure I wouldn’t discover your ruse, sendin’ me on that wild goose chase.”

“It was a perfectly valid bounty, guess you just didn’t read the fine print.” Axl smiled cruelly in return, his eye returning to you as you took a step forward, teeth bared. “Who’s this bitch? Your guard dog?”

In the next moment, his knee exploded in a spray of blood and gore as Cooper shot him, ripping an agonized howl from his throat as he collapsed.

“Since nobody taught you any fuckin’ manners, I thought I might as well do it,” Cooper said, trying to sound bored despite the rage in his tone.

“You stupid motherfucker! I’m gonna … Kill you for this!” Axl managed to growl, writhing on the floor in torment, pathetically trying to drag himself towards any nearby weapon.

Cooper ignored the threats and nodded towards you. “All yours, cowpoke. Best hurry now, fire’s still spreadin’.”

You held his gaze, hoping your eyes could communicate all you wanted to say. Things took a dreamlike quality, time narrowing down to that very moment. You nodded back, and there was the ghost of a smile on his face. You drifted forward, the past and the present intermingling in your mind.

The memory of your father’s laughter. Years of adventures and survival and the foolish belief that you would always have each other. The startled look on his face as the bullet went straight through his jugular. How he’d pushed you to safety right before his body slumped over. The glimpse of his killer’s face, which had branded itself in your mind.

Now, you had it in front of you once more, right where you wanted it. And not a hint of doubt clouded your mind.

You raised the machete over your head–

“This is for my father, you son of a bitch.”

– And swung it down in a swift, deadly arc.

—------------------------------------------------

You weren’t sure how you were walking, but you knew you needed to get a safe distance away from the burning encampment. Cooper held you to him as you trembled all over, adrenaline leaving your system in hot and cold waves.

“There, there, you’re alright,” he soothed, his voice uncharacteristically soft. “We’ll stop soon, I promise. Come down’s a bitch on that one, ain’t it?”

You nodded, having confessed to the Buffout earlier, cold sweat running down your back. “I feel like I need to sleep for a thousand years.”

He chuckled. “I’ll give you a night, sweetheart. Maybe a couple, If I’m feelin’ generous. I ain’t done with you yet, remember?”

You peered up at him, one corner of your lips curling up in a smirk. “Oh yeah?”

“Oh yeah,” he confirmed. “Matter of fact, I think it’ll take you those thousand years to repay all your debts.”

“I can start tonight.”

“Easy there, cowgirl. If I were you, I’d use my time wisely and rest,” he said pointedly. “You know I don’t play around.”

“Hmmm, I don’t know, Cooper. I’m still feeling pretty restless,” You said, lying through your teeth. Exhaustion ran deep, but that wouldn’t stop you from seeking him, eager to become soft once more. At his mercy.

He hummed in thought, eyes flicking down to you, nonchalant. “Guess I might just have to put you to sleep, huh?”

You grinned, biting your lip and pressing yourself closer to his side. You found a small, rundown shack to hole up in, and he poked his head in to make sure there were no rad roaches or mole rats.

There was barely enough space for the two of you, but you didn’t mind. He threw his coat on the floor and you set your stuff down before he was cornering you. He tugged off his gloves, tossing them aside.

“First thing’s first, gotta get you out of these filthy clothes,” he husked, hands settling on your hips, fingers slipping under the hem of your shirt.

He undressed you methodically, enjoying the slowness of it. Revealing more and more of that soft skin he loved to touch, and peeling away the brutality of the night. A hum of appreciation as his hands began to roam, tugging you closer and lowering you onto his coat in an all too familiar way.

“Much better,” he murmured, feasting his eyes and making sure you were unharmed in equal measure.

A few scrapes and bruises, but you’d live. He’d done a good job, all things considered. He let out a low, appreciative whistle, barely able to keep his hands to myself.

Your eyes were shiny with want as you looked up at him, lips parted, body taut with anticipation; Shuddering for an entirely different reason. His nails trailed up your thigh as he leaned forward, hovering over you.

“Well, ain’t you the gift that jus’ keeps on givin’?” he rasped, kissing a spot on your jaw just beneath your ear. “All mine to unwrap and play with.”

You nodded, moving your face so his lips would meet yours. But he held back with a tsk.

“Say it f’me, darlin’.”

“All yours,” you sighed, a teasing smile on your lips. “For the next a thousand years or so.”

“That so?” His hand came up to grasp your face. “We’ll see about that.”

He kissed you then, tongue invading your mouth, licking your upper lip in a way that had you whimpering. It was lazy and indulgent, his free hand slowly trailing down your front.

The same hands that had caused so much destruction now coaxing a fire of a different kind. The night’s events were banished to the periphery of your mind, a languid haze taking over.

And then his fingers reached their target, and he moaned into your mouth as he parted your slick folds and discovered just how wet you were. Unfurling like a flower at his touch, chest heaving, arching against his hand.

You keened as he plunged two fingers inside you, the pad of his thumb pressing against your clit. Drawing circles in that teasing way he knew would have you bucking under him.

“That’s it, nice and slow,” he husked, pulling back to look at your face. “Make those pretty sounds for me.”

It was hard to hold his gaze — much less focus — as he deftly managed to pump his fingers and move his thumb. Your brain nearly short circuited as he found a rhythm that had you dangerously close to the edge… but also left you craving more.

“Fuck,” you gasped, clutching the wrist of the hand that held your face, if only to anchor yourself to something.

His grin was roguish. “Yeah? Gonna give me one like this?”

You tried your best to keep it at bay, wanting to save it for the melding of your bodies, but he could feel the flutter around his fingers.

“Please, I-I want your cock…” you pleaded. “I need you inside me.”

A soft chuckle to conceal the low groan in his throat, the hunger growing within him.

“In time,” he said. “Nobody said anythin’ about you only cumming once, honey.”

With that, his fingers doubled their effort. Your back arched off the ground as you felt pleasure quickly building inside of you — a dam ready to burst.

A choked sound left you as you tumbled over the edge without warning. Muscles clenching as you felt the orgasm rippling outward, blissfully emptying your mind of anything else.

“There’s a good girl,” he praised, feeling the tight squeeze of your cunt around his fingers, his cock twitching painfully in his pants. “See? I knew you could give it to me.”

Your head swam as his hands withdrew. You heard the soft rasp of his zipper being undone and the clink of his belt. Eager, you looked down as he nudged your thighs further apart with his knee, slotting his body between them.

The slick, flushed head of his cock encircled by his fist, pumping himself — large and hard and textured just like the rest of him. He let spit fall from his mouth onto your clit, spreading it with the shaft of his cock as he rutted against you.

Your legs jerked a little with the stimulation against your still puffy clit, but needy whines still poured from your lips like the sweetest melody to his ears.

You knew better than to tell him not to tease you, instead hitching your hips to meet his movements. He growled, barely able to hold back by that point. You softly sighed as your knees pressed against his sides. The head notched at your entrance and he pushed inside, thrusting shallowly to open you up further as he reached halfway.

“Fuckin’ hell, you’re tight,” he rasped as you clutched his arms. “Greedy cunt can’t help squeezing me, huh?”

Before you could even try to respond, his hips snapped a little more roughly, finally burying himself to the hilt. A shared exhale as he bottomed out, fully stretching you.

“C-Cooper,” you breathed. “Fuck, please, keep going.”

“I’ll take care of ya, don’t you worry,” he said, voice ragged.

He grasped your hips hard enough to bruise, pulling back only to slam forward again. Tugging you to meet his thrusts – long and deep – and you submitted amiably. Soon, the room was filled with the obscene, slapping sound of your bodies joining. Your moans spiraling in a hypnotic repetition, your eyes heavy-lidded as you lifted your head to get a better look of him driving into you.

“Takin’ me so well,” he groaned. “Pretty lil pussy made just for me.”

Your ankles pressed against his lower back, urging him on, not wanting to separate from him for even a moment. Sweat dotting your brow and stray tears of overstimulation on your lash line. You were everything worth adoring, in his eyes.

One hand reached up to paw at your breasts, which he’d been watching bounce with each one of his thrusts. Pinching the nipples between his fingers, drawing a small yelp from you, but feeling you clamp down on him at the mix of pleasure and pain.

“O-oh, I’m s-so close… Cooper,” You gasped, and he felt your legs start to tremble.

“Go on, sweetheart, give it to me,” he urged, pushing your legs further up and adjusting his angle. “Wanna feel you come all over my cock.”

Somehow, he felt much deeper that way, pounding at your cervix in a way that had you practically yowling. A momentary dizziness as if you were teetering at a great height… and the second orgasm hit you ruthlessly, forever ruining you for anybody else that wasn’t him.

He let out a long, rough groan, and heat flooded inside of you as he also came. He fucked you through it, hips stuttering as he emptied out.

In the come down, you were both panting hard, drunk on endorphins. All energy sapped out of you, lying boneless on top of his coat. He chuckled at the sight of you, something dangerously close to fondness in his amber eyes.

“Little late to ask if you got protection, huh?”

“You know I keep that RadAway on me,” you rasped, smiling weakly.

“Atta girl. And speaking of,” he murmured, pulling out of you and leaving you achingly empty.

Your vision swam as you watched him tuck himself away, making his way towards his pack. But by the time he found the distinct yellow IV bag, you were slipping into the best sleep you’d ever had.

—————————————

It was well past morning by the time you woke up. The sun was high, and you felt its heat wafting in through the doorway. Cooper wasn’t around, but you were relieved to see his things were still there.

You noticed he’d cleaned you up to the best of his ability, but you were still naked. You winced as you sat up, stretching your arms over your head. Slowly, you stood up and gathered your clothes from around the small room.

Still, despite all the aches, you felt as if a huge burden had been lifted off your shoulders. The pain of remembering had turned into a dull throb which would take more time to fully heal. At least now you could focus on the good memories, no longer haunted by the need for justice.

Freedom was at your fingertips – to choose, to live. Even the sky seemed a little bluer that day.

As you finished getting dressed, you heard the clink of spurs growing closer, his figure hovering in the doorway.

“How’s my little killer?” Cooper said, leaning against the frame, arms crossed over his chest.

“Like I’ve been run over,” you said, grinning. “But good, otherwise.”

“Good. It’s about time we get up outta here. I let you rest more than enough.”

A flutter in your chest at the word we, reminding you that perhaps your freedom would be partial, but you didn’t mind as long as it was in his company.

“Right, where to next?” You asked, hauling your pack onto your back.

He shrugged, sly smile tugging at one corner of his lips. “The world is our oyster, darlin’. We can go wherever we damn please.”

You mirrored his smile, thinking that underneath that tough, seemingly unbreakable exterior, he just might be feeling the same way about you. “Lead the way, then.”

-----

The End.

#cooper howard x reader #the ghoul x reader #cooper howard x you #the ghoul x you #cooper howard smut #cooper howard fanfiction #the ghoul smut #the ghoul fanfiction #fallout smut #fallout fanfiction #minors dni #cooper howard #the ghoul #monster tag

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lubrumalis · 6 months ago

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I know you've already glossed over how simon would be with a partner and what kind of person he would need. but would you be able to go more in depth about what type of person you think he'd be interested in? what kind of person do you think would suit him best?

ghosts ideal type

who would this man be interested in?

first of all, i think ghost isn’t blinded by physical attraction. of course everyone has their preferences when it comes to height, weight, etcetc but i really dont think ghost cares. at least for 2009 ghost, hes a gentleman who doesn’t judge others. tall? short? fat? skinny? ugly? pretty? he doesn’t give a fuck. i think 2009 ghost is very attracted to kindness and compassion for others, leading him to have a soft spot. in the end i think he’d be very interested in someone who constantly is on the lookout for others and is very independent. in the comic hes always the one saving others and taking that responsibility, so he finds it nice when theres someone out there thats similar. hes the typa guy to fall for the girl next door whos constantly smiling, but knows how to playfully banter with him.

i highly doubt ghost would ever be attracted to someone in tf141 or working with him in the military… since to him work is work. there are also no females in the SAS (its true!) with only 2 passing pre selection in 2021, meaning ghost would have little exposure to working with female teammates. even if there is, it would be a huge slow burn romance imo.

also on the enemies to lovers thing—i dont see that happening. reboot ghost gives the vibes of a man who’d lowkey do that at first, but itd never happen. ghost is a simple man when it comes to relationships: i like you + you like me = mutual feelings. he wouldn’t get the whole ‘i kind of hate you because im pissed at you but also find you attractive’ trope. in fact he’d find it really annoying. he was already betrayed by his soldier teammates once, hes not gonna take it well if someone on his team suddenly gets aggressive towards him in the name of 'attraction'.

ghost isn’t shallow. but he would want his partner to be clean of drugs, have basic hygiene, and dress cutely from time to time. stuff like big ass and big boobs with an hourglass isn’t of his concern at all. in the comic he was in this bar full of prostitutes with his team, every soldier was enjoying their time with a girl—except ghost. he even told a prostitute to go fuck off when she got too touchy. so this can prove hes really not that hypersexual.

traits s/o needs

someone independent. they can cook, clean, live on their own for long periods of time. ghost is a soldier, meaning his schedule is different from most men. hes deployed for sometimes 6 months at a time, so his s/o needs to be content with living alone for long periods of time. the fact ghost is also deployed in active war zones and literal deserts while surviving on 5 hours of sleep, means he cant text or call daily either. this person can’t think that ghost is being distant or not loving them enough, its simply the life of a top tier SAS soldier. ghost doesn’t want this to happen either, but the person must be able to feel secure and independent without him… this also means knowing the possibility ghost could die at any point during his deployment.

someone who values acts of service. first of all, ghost has had a lot of people disappoint him in his life. general shepherd, his american teammates during the mission to destroy roba, and his dad. id argue his brother tommy too (used to be an addict), though its not disappointment its moreso “im not happy you’re on drugs”. ghost needs someone who does things for him that proves trustworthiness and loyalty. small things, like taking care of him when hes sick and preparing a warm meal when he comes back from the freezing outside. id imagine ghost does the same for his partner.

someone with good and strict morales. ghost is a good guy, and we know it. he prevented a girl from getting sexually assaulted, spent years guiding his drug addict brother into rehab, and will just punch about anyone who he thinks is pure evil. even after months of brainwashing and torture done by roba, when every american special forces soldier gave in, ghost didnt. he needs someone similar—morales they will never break … ever. even when tortured.

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pansy-picnics · 9 months ago

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A vat7k related question.

What do you think is Hugo's gender identity? Cus I want to hear what you think Hugo's gender is and the story behind it.

EHEHEHE personally i think she’s genderfluid and uses he/she/they pronouns…….I think he was kind of an uncracked egg up until the trials though. like, he’s been in survival mode for so long that he’s never had the time or luxury to really think about himself or his identity….i think he’s had a lot of different disguises over his career though, and those personas are either male or female depending on what the situation calls for so he’s not a stranger to dressing femininely either.

but yeah…i think for a long time hugo just identified as male by default cuz like…what else would he be LOL. if he had any doubts at all they weren’t significantly hindering him or anything so he just buried them with all the other of the emotions he doesn’t want to feel. but like the closet is made of GLASS and this becomes especially obvious when she teams up with 3 other teenagers who are also transgender so sometimes she’ll just Say Shit and they all turn around and look at her like “…….🤨”

i have this very vivid scene in my head where varian comes out to the gang as trans and hes clearly really uneasy abt it. and hugo doesn’t know what to say so he just tries to relate by saying the first thing that comes to mind and goes “oh yeah i get it i mean. sometimes i wish i was a girl but like not all the time yk” and nuru and varian both just stop and stare at him

hugo, getting nervous: …Sorry that’s probably not the same thing forget i said anything

nuru: No i think we should talk about this?

anyways yeah….other than her traveling party giving her some weird looks nothing actually really came of these conversations bc hugo would refuse to think about herself even if you put a gun to her head

fast forward to post-trials though, and hugo’s been living in the castle with varian for about six months…it was REALLY messy for both of them while she was adjusting, but at this point shes finally started to let her guard down a little, and all of a sudden she has SO much free time and she has no idea what to do with any of it. she’s stealing collecting things, tinkering with all kinds of useless little gadgets, rapunzel is teaching her tons of little arts and crafts projects. overall shes pretty content despite everything. So anyways then the gender crisis hits them like a fucking freight train

honestly i’m like half joking when i say i think it started bc they just kept forgetting to cut their hair. like one day they looked in the mirror and they’re like “wow my hairs getting so long i kinda look like a girl lol. Wait”

AND AS FUNNY AS IT IS ITS SO. WILDLY UNFAMILIAR TO THEM. like all of a sudden theyre SO insecure for as far as they can tell, NO reason and it drives them CRAZY. i dont even think that hugo dislikes their masculine features after coming out, i think they embrace them if anything but its just like…going from 0 to 100 so fast and suddenly being so hyper aware of themselves in a way that they NEVER were before…having to realize that they’re definitely Not cis. it’s fucking TERRIFYING!!!

not to mention it hits him all at once during a time when he’s still frankly really paranoid about him and varian’s relationship, and he’s kinda walking on eggshells bc deep down he’s convinced that var’s just gonna get tired of him eventually and kick him out. its like he’s just waiting for the final nail in the coffin despite the fact that there is literally no coffin.

All that being said i think it takes him a while to work up the courage to talk to varian about it. and he knows he won’t like. hate him for being trans or anything (I sure hope he wouldn’t, at least, seeing as he is literally also trans) but varian’s already done SO much for him and helped him through literally everything already….he doesn’t want to burden him any more than he already has. he also cant comprehend that someone can just Like him, like, as a person, so he’s convinced himself that varian must see something specific in him right now and he’s afraid that if he changes himself drastically in any way then whatever varian saw in him just. won’t be there anymore. If that makes sense

as for who he actually goes to first- honestly i think it’d have to be lance. at least in my head lance was the first person hugo really started to bond with aside from varian….he didn’t start letting his guard down with rapunzel until quite a while after that. also i think he’s worried that if he tells rapunzel she’d end up accidentally spilling something to varian (which is like. Valid bc she’s a horrible liar) he’d definitely write a letter to nuru, too, but nuru is also in another kingdom, and that message takes a while to get to her, so it’s more something they talk about after the fact

when he finally does get a letter back after dumping this revelation on her it’s just like

“dearest hugo. upon reading your letter i desperately wanted to tell you that i told you so, but i realize that would be in poor taste, seeing as you are clearly struggling right now. Moreover,-“ /j

regardless of who she tells first, they obviously all support her and encourage her to talk to varian as well…And ofc varian hypes her up to no end when she finally does. i wanna say it’s a sweet emotional scene but i feel like varian was also under the assumption that she figured out the gender thing like a year ago /j

hugo: ,,,,so like. i don’t think i’m a guy

varian: . yeah?

hugo:

hugo: TFYM “YEAH”?????!!!!???

varian: D. DID WE NOT ALREADY KNOW THIS?

hugo: ,???? NO???!!???!

jokes aside though as soon as hugo does decide he wants to explore his presentation more varian immediately consults rapunzel who gets WAY too excited about it and it kind of scares hugo a little bit. /j like Do you want to cut your hair? Dye it? Do you want new piercings? TATTOOS????

they eventually just settle on getting her a few new pieces to add to her wardrobe and that works out fine. varian sees his girlfriend in a dress and loses his mind etc etc. All is right in the world

#vat7k #varian and the 7 kingdoms #tangled ask #varian and the seven kingdoms #varigo #varian #tts headcanons #pansy rambling again #pansy-art #i first answered this like two weeks ago but i lost the entire post and i got so mad that i just didnt bother writing it out again #until now i guess #hugo rottewange

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savannahsdeath · 1 year ago

Note

Hi <33 I love love love your writing and I really want your take on what fucking santa barbara!Ellie would be like if your up to it 🫶🫶

first of all THANK YOU💗💗 and yes ofc i tried my best !!

SANTA BARBARA!ELLIE X READER HEADCANONS + EXAMPLE ONESHOT

mdni please<3

warnings: 18+!! smut

writers note: its not like my typical hcs because this ones more like umm with plot?? idk how to say this but i hope ykwim😓ENJOY!!

🌿 she's definitely rough like im sure 100%

🌿 she would degrade you but she also praises you from time to time

🌿 now, hear me out, she doesnt have her usual smirk. like someeetimessss but mostly she looks so stern and focused youre literally scared to make a sound

🌿 she definitely doesnt care about making a mess. shed be sooo sloppy istg!!!!

🌿 she also doesnt care about whatever youre saying. she barely listens. everytime you hit her with a 'stop/too fast' she either completely ignores you or replies with some 'huh? what did you say?' and shed go even faster..

🌿 she def uses strap but also loves just using her fingers. she just wants to feel it ykwimmm

heres an example story(lets skip the plot)

its not really what i meant but whatever😓

You couldn't stop yourself from moaning, what seemed like an invitation for Ellie to shush you by pressing her lips to yours. It silenced you, but not stopped, as your inaudible groans were now caught in Ellie's throat.

You were unable to move, pressed against the wall, so she didnt need to hold you. With her free hands she started undressing you both, knowing you wont be able to do so by yourself. She didn't break the kiss though, only stopping for a second when she had to pull your shirt over your head and didn't have access to your face. She continued right after.

You're not sure when did you moved to the bed, but here you were, laying down beneath her.

She kissed your neck, leaving wet spots on it. She was moving down your body, as you played with her hair, shutting your eyes closed.

Not long after that, a few more of your body parts were red from her nibbling - inner thighs mostly.

Even though she took her time, it didn't take too long. She knew youre impatient and wasn't in mood to mess with you, not yet, not like that.

Soon after, she buried her face between your legs, planting the same messy kisses all over there.

Her hands were holding onto your thighs, preventing them from clenching. You knew her grip will leave bruises, painful ones too, but you didnt care.

Ellie's tongue was definitely doing a good job, playing with your clit, slidding in and out of your entrance.

Her fingers didn't loose up but her thumbs started gently tracing circles on your skin, which definitely made it seem less aggressive.

When she was finished with her mouth, one of her hands took the initiative. She was rubbing two of her fingers for a few short moments, before pushing them in.

You were finally able to see her face - her expression. She looked at you firmly, like one bad move could get you killed.

You were whining and whimpering, desperately begging her to slow down.

"Sh, shhh... Just take what youre given, will you?" The corners of her mouth moved slightly upwards, creating a little smile.

You nodded but continued squirming, your thighs trembling, breath shaking...

"Oh, dont be so dramatic. Youre doing good, you'll handle it, trust me." She reassuringly patted your side. "People survived worse things."

Did that help? Well...

But you knew its the best she can do when it comes to being nice. You couldnt blame her, not after you found out about her past. She killed more people than you ever talked with, after all..

Your mind went blank and you couldnt think of anything to say, so you kept mumbling the two words you always do - 'Ellie' and 'please'. At this point, it seems your mouth remembered how to say these. Your tongue knew exactly what to do to make them come out of your mouth, while it was struggling with any other word.

But it was enough for her to know what you want to say.

When youre finally done (she can tell youre close by the way you scream her name, so she knows when to go faster), she cleans you up with her toned expression.

"See? You'll live, atta fucking girl."

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kel-lance · 9 months ago

Text

JJK Mafia Au (JJK x Reader) PART 2

Part 1

Warnings:- TW: Dead dove dont read (DDDR) Minors do not interact (MDNI): SA, Physical Assault, DubCon, NonCon, Mindbreak, Public Humiliation, Breeding, Ownership, Gaslighting, Multiple manipulation, RWORD, PTSD, a lot more toxic sh.

Premise: Reader lives in a city where the two biggest gangs keep things line until the third gang showed up. That had nothing to do with you though, until dumb luck just happened to favor you one day. Basically You’re picked up and used by every dangerous criminal within the clans due to some alliances they had to create due to some members messing up the previous alliances. ((Almost everyone’s gonna have a turn 🤗)) ( i have 11 more chapters planned out right now meaning after i write those ill still be writing more.)

“We’re done for today.” The large man reaches for his robes. You don’t bother to move. Just breathing hurt. It was his off day and he was deciding to break you in, deciding to keep you for however long you were durable. He was amused with your reactions. He liked it. He found it interesting how you were also trying to survive. He’d play along as your god now.

You lay in the bed and his finger prints stained your skin, each strike created blots of purple and blue and green. You liked bruises before, it showed how you fought for it.

You apparently woke up two days later, and he lets you rest. Your body finally turns off survival mode for a second, just a second to adjust to the warm room. Four walls, the nice smell, it was just another thing you weren’t used to. Stillness. It was boring. But under these circumstances you were glad to have your own padded room to deal with this.

The time you were left alone, you didn’t know how long that would be. Another hour or so you’d think he’d come back in, hearing as you’re up. Time for more torture, though do torture victims get a bed and tended to? It felt more like you were a sacrifice, meant to appease him, though no one handed you over.

You were brushed, scrubbed raw, and even felt a bit of shame for the way you were living compared to the two ladies who were taking care of you. But you didn’t know how long they’ve been in this line of work. Hell they honestly looked like they were born into it with the cold looks in their eyes. They could care less about your well-being, though they found and scrubbed every inch of you. Of course you didn’t want strangers to look at you, especially after such a moment that brought you here. To be real, these twins are probably the only people who knew you more than anyone you currently knew.

Friends? You had a few, some to help you out sometimes, some to let you crash at their place. It was all fair game to the people you knew. Life was never easy for them and they knew of you being a free spirit. You didn’t leech off of them for you’d always show up with something in exchange, usually something you stole but it would never get traced back, it was either too common (but useful) or just something that would never be brought out of shown off.

You weren’t a bad friend for it, if anything you were the perfect guest, though this time you didn’t mean to give yourself away for a few nights stay.

“I gotta get out of here, but where would I go? These people have already seen my face and I can’t tell how many more there would be. I can’t request anything to learn the layout of this place and no one will talk to me. If I leave I’ll have to run further and faster than I already have been…” You ponder more, sitting at the table placed in front of the window.

They’re smart enough to know what I’d do if I wanted to pick a fight with their lord, of course there are guards at more doors, even under the window out your room, and it’s safe to say that there’s even a guard at each vent that’s connected to your room.

“Why does it seem like I’m so special?” You sit and open the window, the guard below moves from his post to observe you on the same side has the other posted to view you. You look down at then and offer a wave, saying you’re not doing anything stupid, but you just wanted some air. One of them leaves, probably to get Sukuna.

“I bet he’s just a lonely loser and I just happen to fall into his lap, or maybe I was one of many and was the newest. The girls here looked like they could be in the same position as you, though why weren’t they? They didn’t look like they were his blood, and there was no way that he could be their dad. That would make things even worse since you’re close in age as the twins.

You see the guard go back to his post, nonchalantly. “Weirdo.” You thought. Not even a second later your room door whips open. Jumping from your place at the table, you turn and see who other than the man with the unpredictable entrances. “Finally up?” He leans on the door frame. “Honestly, you’re so dramatic for that.” He teased, being strangely familiar to you.

“Dude…” You caught yourself about to tell off this stranger. All you’ve known from him is that he’s having fun taking you and making you a toy, that his name was Sukuna and how everyone seemed under his control. Not that they enjoy it, but it didn’t look like anyone, even in their numbers, would stand up to someone like him.

It still wasn’t apparent for you. He only told you his first name, his last could tell you that you were in even more danger than any “normal” man doing this to you. It could be such a metaphor but you’re literally trapped in the best place you’ve ever been. Was that just life? all the bad comes up when you’re supposed to be happy, and realizing how good you’ve had it as it gets ripped apart in front of you? The balance of it all only comes with ignorance, which was also why you wouldn’t get attached. You didn’t run to one person for everything you didn’t need more than what you’d ask for and that wasn’t much. If they were lucky you’d be there for 3 days at most.

You lost your voice, his presence set in, bringing you out of your (if you can all it that) relaxed state. He notices you tense up, the look in your eyes begging him to give your body a break. He huffs and saunters into the room, taking a seat at the end of the bed, the side that’s facing you. “You had some time to clear your head, now tell me what was your intention. Playing dumb suits that pretty face of yours… But that’s not why I’m here.”

You sure knew nothing about this guy. Other than his name and how his body looked. How he felt was different, it just happened so fast that you could only remember how it lingered in your belly after he left you the second time. It wasn’t something you can forget, those were the best orgasms of your life. “Sukuna… I’m serious.”

“You expect me to believe that? Did I hit you too hard?” You almost wanted to laugh, you saw stars and colors you couldn’t before his knuckles contacted your skull. Lifting his hand from his side to place under his chin made you flinch, a bit too hard for his liking apparently. It took a lot for you to muster standing up on your own, much less realize you had to get to the table by needing support from the wall. It was like you were in an ice skating rink and had to hold onto the walls for dear life, except there was no ice, it was just pain in your body not letting you level yourself out.

“When you’re ready to talk, I might hear you out. My patience is thin you already know.” He stands and closes your door, sent a shiver down your spine. Him not being close to you, or hurting you, having this quick visit was so unsettling.

It haunted you for hours. He didn’t touch you. The edge of the bed where he sat still held an energy, like he left a part of him right there to keep watch over you.

He definitely hit you too hard, you were thinking more outlandish things to go with this scenario. Like why didn’t the touch you? You thought he was going to keep a pattern, that maybe after this he would come in periodically to taunt you. That maybe his patience has worn out and he was going to get rid of you any minute now, or to use you again.

The trauma you got from this certainly messed with your self soothing methods. Every time you catch yourself hitting your peak of your self imposed orgasms, you were almost wishing you had more than just your fingers. You didn’t want him, but seriously its already been 2 weeks. You were gonna go crazy in here. The girls kept bringing you your meals, and a bathroom is attached, though you couldn’t do much by yourself.

You were to let the others feed and bathe you, and you honestly hated it. It was way too weird, you never talked to them, and they never tried with you so it felt like there was an agreement to just not speak about it. That none of you were here willingly. That gave you some insight. Your body healed itself enough that you didn’t need the wall to walk anymore, making your trips to the table in front of the window more frequent.

You notice some sort of schedule Sukuna follows, as well as a few other noticeable men in this kind of gated community. Whatever he has gong on here, it felt like you were almost a stolen princess locked away in a tower or something. “You have GOT TO get a hold of yourself.” You didn’t need to see a doctor or someone, you were fully aware that these thoughts were just you daydreaming to escape reality, yet again. Though this time it was getting boring, you couldn’t help yourself, literally.

At this point you wanted to even ask one of the guards if they wanted to come in and help you out, but you didn’t have to do that, because a day later you decided to act. Rolling around night time, you decided to open your window a noticeable amount. By then the guards usually leave one guard to patrol the grounds in each quarter.

The ones outside your door either end up sleeping or one leaves the other for a bathroom break, some nights they both go, probably to blow each other you thought. It wasn’t any of your concern, they did it before when you could barely move, but now you were agile again, enough to move around without hissing at each moment.

Placing your ear to the door, you heard light snoring through it. “Okay, just find his room you thought. You knew that it took about 60 steps to reach a stair case, then that would be about 24 steps down. You could hear his footsteps through the pairs of others who followed him, as his echoed with pace, and the others almost scuttled behind them like bugs..

You find your way slipping past heavy wooden doors, making sure it wouldn’t creak, you saw the walkway in the garden. You looked up and saw your room, you knew it was yours as it was the only one with the window open. you knew that the guard just left this fourth of his grounds. You were searching the area for his room. Peering through the windows, it would have been hard to tell if it was him, but his tattoos were honestly unique.

None of them were him, you go back to the walkway, going down the opposite end, just blindly working your way through. You couldn’t just walk through any door, it could be your last mistake, it being Sukuna or not. But it just had to be him, you wanted so badly to find his familiar face and just, you don’t know.

You decide to be more ballsy, there’s surely no way he’s be in the same quarters that has this many people,” you decide to take your chance with the left corridor. “I wouldn’t take him for a cuddly guy anyway.”

Listen, you know it sounds crazy, but if you even got to escape, you’d be hunted like a fox, unnecessarily, and as a spectacle for others to watch. But if you could find him, and do it yourself, “I mean, at least I’d die with something, and what a funny way to go.” You loved to joke about these kinds of things. Anytime it seemed dark, you’d find yourself cracking a joke or going off an other tangents from the barrage of thoughts coming your way.

You hold your breath as you set your fingers around the doorknob, you pull it back slowly, and turn it, to silence any squeaks it may have. After turning it fully, you let it go back and unclenched your fingers to let it go a second time, making sure there was no noise from the metal trap, and decided to go in.

What fucking luck you had as if you broke into another room you’d think your breathing would start to give you away. As you head towards the bed, the raising figure laying there was him. Your eyes had adjusted to the dark, so much so that you could just stand in front of him.

Looking down at him you wondered what you should do. You’re not going to kill him, that’s one thing, though you had nothing to lose, you still liked your life and you enjoyed whatever adventurous you got yourself into. It was always just one thing after the next and you’d rest when needed, but you loved it.

This was totally different though. Before it was like you were born into this work and have to abide by its rules. As of right now you could do /anything/. What else would you do?

You look down at him, kneeling at the edge of the bed to face him. Looking at his face like this, completely defenseless, his harsh eyes weren’t poking at you or telling you exactly what he was thinking. No he was just, he looked human. Like if you were to have met him at any other place it would possibly be on a magazine cover or an army recruitment booth posted wherever.

“Damn bastard is beautiful.” You thought. “I didn’t get this far to stop now. Fucking 2 weeks you keep me here and don’t do anything? Do you know how boring that is? You can’t just keep me here and forget.” All that time alone had gone to your head, did you forget how he treated you the time you met?

Tbh it fades in and out, your memory’s cut up pieces of film that randomly plays an old memory, and since you can’t recognize it, you call it a dream.

Nothing could take you away from where you were now. Looking over him, still not a care in the world. Nothing could wake him if he’d allow it. You cocked your head to align your eyes with his, and reach out and brush your fingertips across his jawline.

How much of this could you enjoy before he kills you for breaking out? Just that thought had you slowly leaning in, your hand before tracing his face was leaning onto the bed to support your intrusion.

First, you kissed his forehead. The poor fuck probably hadn’t felt the touch of a real lover in ages, he just finds and uses whatever and whoever he wants, whenever. Of course you didn’t pity him, but does he even know what being loved properly was like? You’re really one to be asking.

You peck the smooth, hot skin, and kissed a line across his cheek, getting more sensual with the next. His touch, even sleeping was still so manly. His body was so, honestly the words seem odd, but he looked so edible. Like you almost couldn’t keep your lips off of him. He was so yummy when you get a good look at him.

Cupping his face, your lips reach his, beginning to lightly stimulate the connection. You lean in further, applying yourself onto him, guiding open his mouth with yours as you lick his lips. This shit was getting you so excited, considering all that he’s done to you, having this moment, where you’re in control and he was at your mercy, and only you know this.

Continuing to make out with your kidnapper, you moved yourself to get on top of him. His lazy reaction of kissing back had you think he was a deep sleeper, god you really wished.

You opened your eyes just to make sure he was still asleep, but his eyes were staring back at you, with the same look he always has. You didn’t have time to even make a sound before he had you under him. His hand grabbed your waist and turned kept you parallel to him as his leg pushed his body to get on top.

You could feel his erection, he was basically stabbing your thighs with his head. His hands pushed your wrists into opposite sides of your head, and he has you immobilized as he sat on your legs. Most you could move was your toes and neck, but he had pressed his face up against yours.

“I don’t even know where to start with you. If you wanted to kill me, you would’ve already. Maybe I can believe you’re just some random, …but you wouldn’t have come to my room.” He lets a wrist go to reel back and strikes your face as a warning. Seriously, no sane person would just come straight back to him in your situation.

“The guard fell asleep?” Nothing gets by him. You can’t tell if he was just prepared for everything or if he planned this out. The excitement you were feeling before was being clashed with the sudden shock to your face. “Depending how the rest of the night will go will determine his punishment.”

Keeping everything in place, he moves your chin up by his nose, giving him space to start attacking your neck. “We’ll just start with yours.” His grasp tightened around each wrist, so much so that he was pulling on the tendons in your forearms, making your fingers involuntary curl.

Your luck may have run out, but you weren’t as scared. Trying to enjoy the moment as much as possible, knowing fully well that you’re about to be eaten alive, and god, youve been waiting. His teeth grazed your collar bone, making their way back up, making themselves a known threat to your neck.

“Speak.” He orders. “Who sent you?”

“You still think I’m a spy?” The spot where he hit you was pounding, but it didn’t hurt. Other parts of your body were just pulsating along with your heartbeat, you knew he was going to take that as a sign of fear.

“Hurry up, we have a meeting tomorrow so I’m trying to be considerate for everyone else.”

He’s still not listening. You weren’t either at this point, finding his roughing up sort of endearing. Maybe he didn’t want to get blood on his bed, or maybe he did care about that stupid meeting. All you could feel was vigorous pulsating from your wrists, your face, your heart, and more than anything else, your pussy.

This was literally what you came here to do, this was why he even took you with him wasn’t it? Seriously whatever big shot he thinks he is… this shit wasn’t legal; You were serious on going out with a bang, raising your hips to create some friction on his hard on.

Sukuna seemed to notice the look in your eyes and gave you another firm slap. “Focus, doll.” He adjusts his hips a few inches too far down your liking, his hands being the only thing touching you.

“Put it back.” You got this far, now he wants to start questioning you immediately after waking up? He picked you up after meeting and ignored you for two weeks, you’re about to do what most others would. Especially if they’re in the same situation with the same circumstances.

“You’re not the one to be giving orders, much less to me.”

You raise your hips back up to his head, having it dip into you, crossing your clit but unable to enter fully. His tip could find its way in no problem, it was just his call, and that almost drove him over the edge. You’ve stopped fighting back, for something like your freedom and what’s better for you.

What you were after now was just one more orgasm brought by that monstrous mf. He doesn’t drop his guard, or change his face at all as he accepted “your bait/distraction”. In this position, you’re still straight legged, laying in his bed as he has you held down, arms pinned, palms up, and legs trapped as he sat on your thighs.

He could easily kill you now, but it would honestly leave a bad taste as no one’s been killed in his room before, much less even entered without permission. You both didn’t know what to think really.

To you he’s some strange and strong asshole who’s been unclear if you were his sex toy or if you were “invited” and he was just being a terrible host. Honestly, it felt worse to you to have everything you needed; Without your freedom, you were honestly thinking it’d be better to be dead.

To him, you were dangerous. You got it all right. From the room, to the person to bump into, to the alley. You could have been a spy laying low, from whichever gang he thought you were from, he thought it would be good to hold you off to send a message to see who would come collect you first. They wouldn’t send someone if they didn’t have something to say.

At first he did just want to keep you until one of them sent them back another message. It didn’t matter what happened to you, honestly he got bored. He’s a busy man, there was really nothing else to say.

So imagine his surprise how you came crawling all over him tonight. He knew an assassin would’ve done it before he even knew the door opened, they were to make sure it was quick. The attack would have had to been fatal, whether they succeed in one shot or have them die as they’re leaving. And how quick they leave is how desperately they want to live.

You, just came in to stare at him and decided you wanted something else. And it didn’t seem like revenge. That was a first, especially for him. Right now he was allowing it, letting you go. There was no way you could harm him, he concluded.

Looking down at you squirm and pout, upset on how close you were to getting what you’ve been aching from and for. He won’t drop his guard, but he sure as hell was silver platter served. Really how badly did you want it?

He connects your wrists at the top of your head with one hand, the other has its index finger and thumb at the base, controlling himself with those two fingers. He raises his erection and knocked it against your clit, the strikes sent waves of pleasure from your core to the top of your head and palm of your feet, having you whimper out.

Your aching hole needed him, it was taking him so long. Seriously you wish he’d kill you now because this so actually torture. The only thing you could do was start to cry, tears leaving their corners and running into your hair. You were more than frustrated. Angry, horny, needy, powerless, you wanted it so bad you were losing control, it didn’t matter, no one else could judge you, and who would be worse than Sukuna?

“You came in here, climb all over me, just to cry now? You’re so pathetic.”

“Please,” You whine. “I want you to put it in.”

His face changed, from laughing at you beg, to sharpening his focus. Even after all this, getting caught, threatened, insulted, you’ve started to beg for it. He takes his legs up from pinning yours, putting them to your sides as he aligns himself to your front hole. “Say it again.”

“Please Sukuna, put it in-“ He lowers his hips and dives deep into you. He watches as your head writhes. Instantly youre spread apart, the sudden plunge casted a warm blush across your face and electricity towards the tips of your fingers. “Oooh,”

“Fuuuuuck.” He finished for you. He continues to grind deeply into you, quickly using his now free hand to gag you from waking everyone up. Good thing too as you were messy, fucked silly couldn’t cover it. You gave up control a long time ago. He wouldn’t kill you, not right now anyway, you especially wouldn’t let him without trying to get one last nut. It was diabolical how down bad he had you. It was more of your unhealed trauma and he just happened to be the best person to help you out, willing or not.

——————————————————————————

You lay there as the base of your back ached. Every part of your body was bruised again, you could only imagine to move again as you tried catching your breath. You had lost count on just how many times he’s forced an orgasm out of you, mind numbingly rich euphoria every time. Nothing else mattered, you were more than thrilled the first 2 times but started to wonder if he ever got tired.

It wasn’t until after your fifth orgasm that he managed to get his first one in. You were honestly almost regretting climbing into his room but his second had him pinning you on your back as he lay on your lower torso and legs. You couldn’t feel anything but your pulsating cervix, half feeling good from the pain and lingering pleasure, the other half making you know that this was a mistake and the nausea was on you.

Raising your free arm, you weakly start to pat his head. It was over, you insatiable perverted needs were fulfilled, so what were you going to do now? It’s not like you’re in love with the guy, you don’t even know if you’ll get to wake up tomorrow with this stunt. “It was worth it.” You thought. Running your fingers thorough his hair, and tracing his back, you fall asleep holding him, accepting that this is it.

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crumb-crumblet-s-crumbington · 2 years ago

Note

Is “willingly unloved” canon to the roomates au?

yes, unless it is excplicitly stated all comics/ drawings under the hashtag r canon!

it was also a bit of a character study of ethan, i wanted to draw what i think he would act like after going through something as traumatizing as re8 and re7. a lot of the times ethan getting horribly hurt (arms/legs cut off) is either passed off as a joke of "haha he lost another arm" or passed off as him being a idiot being stupid. i wanted to explore how those things would affect him and how all his past relationships did as well. both mia and chris, two people he cared for and trusted broke his trust, mia on two different occasions. (pls dont turn this into a anti mia post lol, its just straight canon im just acknowledging what she literally did. what she did affects the people in her life, and this post is about ethan. it doesnt nesscarily matter what her intentions were since the execution was still horrible so pls dont get upset at me)

in re7 he suffers the consequences of someones lie, and it repeats in re8. i feel like he would be far more reserved after re8. he cant trust anyone and he now lives with the knowledge that he and his daughter r bioweapons and there organizations out there to get him. in this AU chris is helping by trying to return ethan to a normal life but after re8 ethan would not trust chris imo. not in a way where he thinks chris will turn him into the BSAA or whatever but more like hes worried that chris is possibly hiding something important or planning something he doesnt know.

he would have major trust issues and probably would have huge difficulty with opening himself up to another connection, especially since leon is friends with chris. ethan would probably be wary due to association.

after re8 he is left with nothing. his wife lied to him again, and the man who was suppose to protect him did a horrible job at it LOL. he has rosemary and thats it. and at any moment someone could take her for being a bioweapon. he would live a life of paranoia and stress trying to give rosemary and normal life while trying to keep her safe at the same time. i feel like getting divorced with mia would be the best option for ethan. as much as they loved each other it wasnt healthy. mia wanted to forget and move on while ethan knew nothing and wanted to understand more. its unfortunate i know. in re8 ethan has a book about weapons and says, "its not paranoia if theyre really out to get you."

its honestly so tragic 😭

in a more realistic way to canon, ethan was doomed to die in that village. a life after it all, after surviving re8 would be horrible. the BSAA is corrupt so hes stuck with chris trying to hide and live a normal life. theres no where for him to go.

BUUTTTTTT... in a cutesy AU where leon and ethan r roomates he gets to heal so yayy. ethan would definetly be very hesitant to open up to leon and would probably not trust him for a long time

for now its just him and rose

#ethan winters #leon kennedy #lethan #roomate au

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icarusredwings · 5 months ago

Text

Rewatched Deadpool 1. Took notes.

WARNING: Discussion of mental illness topics, ending yourself, trauma, violence, etc.

Civil debate/ conversation welcomed. Sorry its super long. I think a lot.

Notes:

You know what? We see Wade coloring a lot. What's our status on just giving him cartoons snacks and coloring books? He needs it.

I think we all forget how actually impressive this man is. I just watched this cancer having fucker do like 50 flips.

Whatta man is so Logan Howlett coded.

"Bad deadpool" "good deadpool!"

Deadpool has been helping kids for a while. He terrified a little creep while he himself was a huge creep.

Missed up his words and Vanessa smiled at him. With that "aw hes cute" kinda thing.

When talking about their childhood (whether he's lying or not, hes not about the uncle) and he outdos her so much that she giggles.

The first date he takes her ducking skiiballing instead of yk prostitute stuff

Hes so romantic oh my god.

Theyre giggling and joking like all the time. Personally thanksgiving is my favorite scene before he proposes with a fucking ring pop.

I shouldn't laugh but the way he said "wtf" when passing out

Vanessa instantly jumping to "what can we do? There has to be something" makes me instantly respect her as a chronically ill person myself. Partners who medically defend each other make me so happy because a lot of people divorce their partners when they get "too sick" let alone dont show up to specialist appointments.

Him accepting death so quickly is a sign of mental illness, and you can see him be confused on why shes so upset. Shes crying and hes sitting here like "why do you care if I die or not?" He physically feels so unloved that he just doesn't get it.

"I dont know. Might further the plot. " Oh, so you know about wades little mental tv show he puts on in his head as a coping mechanism?

Also... Weasel.. YOU KNOW WHO ELSE IS A WEASEL!? Shit sorry wrong movie.

Its not until now that hes crying because he realizes if he does then no more vanessa. We already know hes very co dependent and many people only care about themselves BECAUSE of other people. Which is also considered a sign of wanting to ☠️ self.

The whole "superheros are all lame ass teachers pets" thing is so funny if you think about how much beef he has with the xmen when in reality I have a feeling Wade would love charles in a "Ugh im in trouble with Daddy wheel chair again." COUGH "old bald heavens gate looking mother fucker" COUGH

"Thats not nice" No. But wade is genuienly not nice either.

"This is embarrassing. Please stop, " Colosus said what we all were thinking.

Bro literally cut/broke off his own hand and didn't whine a single time. If you ever. EVER hear this man express pain it is 99.9% his own choice to let you know that it hurts.

During his changing process, Francis says "the only thing that doesn't survive is a sense of humor" wade says "we'll see about that" and smirks.

What also makes sense to me is that he did NOT break easily. They did test after test after test and this man still wasn't breaking. His spirit is incredibly strong and as much as we enjoy joking about how stupid he is, Wade is extremely resourceful.

Its like he has created an alter ego of humor and kindess in order to keep up with the fact he DOES understand how fucked up this world is and whats happening/happened around him but refuses to acknowledge it until he has too. Ussually for survival.

Ive seen theories that he has DID or a type of Scizophreania and the voices in the comics are obviously in his head. I have mixed feelings about it because even his thoughts have thoughts of their own in some cases. Talking to no one is often a sign of abadonment, esspecially in children who are school age and get lonely when taken from their families to attend school. Its almost as if wade never lost his and hes subconsiously talking to himself to keep himself calm/ from panicking in high stress situations.

"But then how does he know hes in a movie" thats the thing. He doesn't. Hes pretending to cope. Main charaters cant die and until he dies he has this mental show/movie going on to keep himself from realizing all of this is true. That this is reality.

Cunningham mentions breakfast for his kids and suddenly, wade wakes up. Hes not joking anymore. This is a "oh shit... I wanna make breaktsst for my kids too... with my wife vanessa" moment.

"So whats wrong with him?"

Diiiiiddd we all forget about scout master kevin? Uncle? Dad? That fact that the oxygen was physically taken from his brain and was given Co2 poisoning over and over? For multiple days? This is the same man who blew himself up just to escape because they told him he wasnt going to see vanessa again.

And then he fought a guy naked, survived the entire building burning down, and now is so insecure about his looks that he thinks he made the baby cry in the street.

Theres people staring at him, flinching away, called names, people see him and cross the street. (So when he tells Logan that he knows his pain when it comes to public settings, hes not lying)

Blind Al is literally the reason deadpools suit is what it is. Why the idiot thought white was gonna be a good idea- See above. Unlike Al, who could smell the blood/ bleach.

I really love al. She's like the adult Toph.

"I hear everything in this duplex." OH, you poor thing.

"The guy that turned me into this freak-"

Al: *bitch im blind face*

As far as she's aware, he looks normal. Which is beautiful when you think about it, but it's funny when you think about the fact that he's so insecure about his face that he purposly found a blind room mate that couldn't judge him.

And they cuddle while he gets dating advice from grammie 🥹❤️

I really like how the entirety of Sister Margaret's School for Wayward Children (HellHouse in the comics) stood up for Weasel. They're murderers. But they're family.

What they did to vanessa was straight fucked. Her fiance up and leaves without notice, youre just trying to work and live your life, you get kidnapped.

Negasonic is so cool. I love them.

Dopinder (The cab guy) is so cool too. I love him too. Kill that guy in your trunk. "Mr. Pool" reminds me of Tom holland spiderman.

"It is not boy band >:(" Suurreee it isn't.

"Wheres your duffle bag?" You mean his dollar general store tree hello kitty book bag filled with guns?

"Cue the music" *no one even gives a fuck at this point when he talks to the imaginary cams*

Negasonic mid battle: Hold on- "Hey Yukio, yeah I just gotta fuck shit up real quick, ttyl?"

"Sure thing! <3 You go baby!"

I dont know anything about negasonic but she reminds me of Gambit with her energy powers.

Like I said. Hes smart when its a serious situation because he immediately threw his katana into the glass so vanessa could breathe, only to immediately turn sappy and childish again when he sees her stab francis with it. Heart hands, is hallucinating because theres a knife in his brain (literally), sex joke. Etc.

Colossus shut the fuck up. Let this man kill him. He's hurt Soooooo many people. A bullet costs less then a dollar. His amount of therapy alone is going to be like *checks calculations* 80 billion.

"Not the nethers" Wade can and often does show proof of hurting but hed rather cut off his hand then let vanessa punch him in the balls. "Ow- owie 5000"

Hello Hugh Jackman.

After not seeing each other for so longer they instantly go back to the fibbing. "I live in the house with 12"

"You live in a house??" Funny guys get the girls. I should know. My wife says im super funny (yes im in therapy)

Pinky promises really matter to him.

Hes such a silly billy he brought out the phone with their song on it. God what a romantic idiot.

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