#i actually don't know anything about this show but i have been interested!!!

[flowersforbucky]

i got it bad

logan howlett x reader (worst!logan x reader)

word count: 4.9k

summary/prompt: logan can't help that he has super hearing and overhears you - wade's seemingly sweet, shy neighbor - telling vanessa what you fantasize about doing to him. believing that you won't ever act on it, he takes matters into his own hands.

or - getting yourself off on logan's abs

warnings/tags: smut, 18+ only mdni, reader is afab, no use of y/n, logan's pov, porn with a little plot, male masturbation, teasing, nipple/breast play, some tit slaps, multiple orgasms, unprotected p in v, cream pie

Ever since Logan first met you, he hasn’t been able to get you out of his fucking head.

Which is really unfortunate for him, considering you seem indifferent to his existence.

Wade says that you're just an introvert, and that it takes you a while to get comfortable around new people, but after living across the hallway from you for the last few months, Logan is sure that you have no interest in him outside of simple, polite conversation whenever the two of you run into each other.

He first notices you from across the room when you enter Wade and Althea's apartment – his apartment now, too, he supposes. The small space is crowded, but you're impossible for him to overlook. He instantly recognizes you from the polaroid picture that Wade had showed him in the Void.

You’re greeted by Vanessa, who kisses you on the cheek and shoves a drink in your hand before dragging you over to where Logan is listening to Wade and Althea bicker about – what were they bickering about again? All he can focus on is the way your dress hugs your curves and the lipstick imprint that you’ve left on the champagne flute in your hand.

He needs to get out more. Go to a bar, get a job, maybe even try out one of those dating apps that Vanessa has suggested to him – something to get him out of this fucking apartment that he's stayed holed up in since arriving in this universe, because he should not be this flustered by a complete stranger.

“Earth to Peanut,” Wade snaps his fingers in front of Logan’s face. He barely processed anything Vanessa had said while she introduced you. Blah blah, neighbor, something something, lives down the hallway. “Jesus, did you get into the white powder under the floorboard? Your pupils are as big as saucers right now.”

“Oh, go easy on him, Wade,” Althea scolds. “It’s natural for pupils to dilate when looking at a pretty girl.”

The expression on your face matches how Logan feels – surprised, embarrassed, slightly mortified.

“You don't even know what she looks like. She could look like me for all you know,” Wade snorts.

“She brings me homemade cookies and she always smells good,” Al retorts. “I don't need to be able to see her to know that she's pretty.”

“Nice to meet you,” Logan finally speaks up with a forced smile. Leave it to his two roommates to make a simple introduction as awkward as possible. “And no, I am not high on cocaine,” he adds with a pointed glare at Wade.

“It’s nice to meet you too, Logan,” you return the sentiment with a chortle and shy smile. “And don’t worry, I never pay attention to anything Wade says.”

Yukio and her girlfriend with the long ass name that Logan has yet to memorize then walk up and gain your attention, leaving Logan wishing he could redo the entire interaction.

He spends the rest of the night hoping for an opportunity to talk to you again, and feeling disappointed when that doesn’t happen.

The next couple of months go similarly. He runs into you frequently – in the elevator, and the communal laundry room of the apartment complex, and when you’re both checking your mail at the same time.

You always greet him with a smile and ask the typical casual conversation questions – how he's liking his new job (he’s not, but he tells you it’s going fine), if Wade is staying out of trouble (no), and how Laura is doing (she’s doing great, actually), but it never progresses much past that.

As soon as the conversation starts to venture into more personal territory, you seem to shut down. You’ll make some excuse about having somewhere to be, wish him a good day, and then you’re gone.

He can’t help himself. He sees how carefree and talkative you can be with Vanessa and hell, even Wade – and he wants that. At least then he may feel a little less crazy for spending so much of his free time racking his brain for ways to get closer to you.

Maybe it’s because it has been so long since he’s had a crush on anyone, but sometimes he thinks he might be losing his mind with how often he thinks of you – your smile, your eyes, your scent, your voice, and the way that having a five minute conversation with you always leaves him feeling for the rest of the day.

That’s why when he’s walking to his apartment one evening, and hears his name come from inside your apartment, he stops dead in his fucking tracks.

God, he knows he shouldn’t listen. He knows he should keep walking, go into his apartment and close the door.

But it’s not like he has his ear pressed up against your door. It’s not his fault that he has super hearing and that the apartment building has paper thin walls.

His brain is yelling at his feet to move but they stay planted firm right where they are.

“He thinks you don’t like him, you know,” Vanessa says. Logan doesn’t need to be able to see to know that there’s a smirk on her face.

He’s tempted to cause some kind of commotion in the hallway and then dash into his apartment, just to stop Vanessa from saying whatever the hell she’s about to say.

“Logan?” You sound appalled. “Of course I like him.”

“I know that you like him,” Vanessa chuckles. “But I can see why he would think otherwise. You act like you can barely stand to be in the same room as the guy for five minutes.”

“That’s not true.” Your voice shoots up several octaves higher than normal.

Logan sends a silent prayer to whoever the fuck is listening that no one walks down this hallway in the next few minutes and sees him standing still as a statue next to your apartment door.

“It’s not that I simply can’t stand to be in the same room as him,” you continue, lowering your voice back down to its normal volume. “It’s that being in the same room as him makes me want to jump his adamantium bones.”

For a second, he really believes that his two hundred year old heart might stop beating.

“I’m fucking pathetic around him,” you huff. “Last week, I saw him pull his t-shirt off in the laundry room to put a clean one on, and ever since then I haven’t been able to stop thinking about grinding my pussy against his abs. Something is seriously wrong with me, Nes.”

But Logan doesn’t hear Vanessa’s response, because he speed walks away while she’s still cackling. By some miracle, Wade isn’t home, so Logan darts past Althea and locks himself in the bathroom.

What the fuck, Jesus Christ, and holy shit all play on a loop in his mind while he tries to ignore the bulge that has quickly formed in his jeans.

The last words he expected to hear anyone say today were jump his adamantium bones and grinding my pussy against his abs – but the fact that he heard those words come from your mouth in your sweet voice has his cock throbbing so hard that he can't think of anything other than you doing exactly what you’ve been fantasizing about.

Images of you straddling him with your bare, wet cunt rubbing against his happy trail, getting yourself off on his body as he plays with your pretty tits –

He let’s out an audible growl and rips the shower curtain open before turning on the water – straight to his normal hot temperature, too. He knows a cold shower isn't going to do him any good right now.

Standing beneath the hot stream, he thinks of what has transpired in the last five minutes and strokes himself in his hand until warm, white liquid follows the water down the drain.

When he finishes, he stills hears your voice in his mind and gets hard again within minutes.

••••••

Logan hasn’t seen you in three days. Three days might not seem like a long time to go without seeing your neighbor, but it feels like a long fucking time for him. In fact, it’s the longest he’s gone without casually running into you since he first met you months ago.

There’s a reason for this, though – he hasn’t checked his mail in days, hasn’t taken any of his laundry down to the basement in days, and has generally tried to avoid leaving his apartment as much as he can out of fear that he’ll see you. He even went as far as to pretend to be napping when you came by with some fresh baked brownies for Althea yesterday.

He wants to see you, of course. Goddamn, does he want to see you. But after overhearing your conversation with Vanessa earlier this week, he doesn’t know if he’s strong enough to look you in the eye and pretend like he hasn't been making himself cum to the thought of you on top of him every time he takes a shower.

But after three days, he finds himself missing you too much to keep up his attempt at distancing himself from you.

What if he’s being ridiculous, staying cooped in this apartment to avoid you? What if you’re just down the hallway, thinking about him at the same time he’s thinking of you?

He's tidying up the kitchen when he sees the pink Tupperware container that you’d brought the brownies in yesterday sitting in the sink. The brownies were long gone – they’d all been eaten by him, Wade and Al within the same hour that you brought them over.

Taking the Tupperware back to you would be the nice, neighborly thing to do, right?

With Al already retired to her bedroom for the evening, and Wade out with Vanessa, he takes it upon himself to wash and dry the container.

It’s a Friday night, so he knows there’s a chance that you’ve got plans and might not even be home, but he still takes a few minutes to fix his hair and swipe some deodorant on before walking down the hallway towards your apartment.

As he approaches your door, he realizes that you are home. There’s light spilling from the crack at the bottom of the doorframe and he can hear low music playing inside. A mix of anxiety and anticipation sets in, but he clears his throat and knocks on your door before he can chicken out.

He hears your footsteps approaching and attempts to wipe any sign of nervousness from his face – he’s just returning your Tupperware, for Christ's sake.

“Logan,” you breathe as you open the door. “I haven’t seen you in a few days,” you greet him. He can’t help but relax at the smile that grows on your face when you realize it’s him. “What are you up to this evening?”

You lean against your doorframe, and Logan has to force himself to maintain eye contact. You’re wearing a matching pajama set – a cute pair of velvet shorts and tank top that shows more of your skin than he’s ever seen before.

“I – uh,” he stammers, holding out the Tupperware container to you. “I just thought I’d bring this back to you. They were great, by the way.”

Your smile spreads to your eyes at his compliment.

“Oh, thanks,” you beam. “I’m glad you got to have one. Wade told me that you were asleep when I came by yesterday so I figured he’d have them eaten by the time you woke up.”

“I’m sure he would have, but Al made him save one for me,” he laughs.

He tries to focus on the conversation at hand, but the fact that you look fresh out of the shower definitely isn’t fucking helping. Bare faced with the scent of your body wash and lotion on your skin, his thoughts begin to stray into dangerous territory fast.

“I don’t wanna interrupt your night, though. I’ll let you get back to—”

“You’re not,” you say quickly as he begins to step backwards. “You're not interrupting. Are you doing anything tonight? I just ordered a pizza and there’s plenty. I was gonna watch a movie, if you want…” You trail off, glancing back and forth between him and your apartment behind you.

He can't help but notice that your voice sounds hopeful.

The invitation excites him more than he cares to admit. Sure, the two of you have hung out plenty of times, but it's always been in a group setting – at one of Wade’s get togethers or movie nights, surrounded by other friends.

But never just the two of you – definitely never in your apartment.

He could never think of saying no to you. Especially not when this is what he's been hoping for since he first me you.

“Yeah. Yeah, I'd really like that.”

You hold the door open for him, letting him enter your apartment. Right away, he notices how different it is from the one that he lives in. Then again, there’s three people cramped into Althea’s – you're the only person who lives here, so you're able to make it entirely your own.

It’s cute, and cozy, he thinks. From your furniture adorned with throw pillows and blankets, to all of your shelves stocked with books, knick-knacks and candles, to the various plants occupying space throughout the living room, it feels endearing and welcoming right away.

“So, where’s Wade at tonight?” you ask as he ventures into the living room. He notes a large cardboard box with an untouched pizza in it on your coffee table. His stomach growls at the sight, and it hits him that he actually is fucking starving.

“He’s out with Vanessa. Fourth time this week,” he answers, turning to find you retrieving two plates from a cabinet in your kitchen. You're angled away from him, and when you raise your arms to grab the plates, your tank top lifts enough to give him a clear view of your midriff. He quickly averts his gaze, pretending to find something on your bookshelf particularly interesting.

“I’m just really glad that they’ve worked through things and seem to be happy now,” you sigh. “He wasn’t in a good place after their breakup. Barely ever left his apartment for the longest time.”

“They’ve got something special, that’s for sure,” Logan agrees.

You hand him a plate, walking past him to your couch. You toss some of the decorative throw pillows to your recliner, making room for him on the sofa. You pat the empty space beside you, an invitation for him to make himself at home.

“Who knows, maybe they'll even get their own place soon and I won’t have to share the living room with him anymore,” he says as he sits down beside you.

It’s a pretty small couch – really more like a loveseat – so it’s a snug fit for the two of you. The skin of your exposed kneecap brushes against the fabric of his jeans as you lean forward to grab yourself a slice of pizza.

“Sounds like you just want Blind Al and Mary Puppins all to yourself,” you tease. You hand him a piece of pizza and close the box before propping your feet up on the table. You lean back, looking at him with a smirk and raised brows.

“If he moves, that dog is going with him and you know it. There’s no way he’d leave her behind,” he shakes his head.

“There’s no way Althea would let him take her. She's grown to be as attached to her as Wade is. I think even you like her more than you care to admit.”

“What can I say? She has a way of weaseling herself into your heart,” Logan sighs.

“Oh, it’s definitely the tongue,” you shrug through a bite of pizza.

Logan grimaces as a vivid image of Mary Puppins French kissing Wade awake flashes through his mind, but he can't help but laugh.

You turn on some action-comedy that Logan has never heard of, and the two of you eat and take turns making comments about whatever is happening on the screen for the first half of the movie.

He tries to stay focused on the film, he really does, but every now and then you readjust your position on the couch, causing him to catch a whiff of your perfume or your thigh will brush against his and he'll have to force his attention back to the characters on the screen.

No matter how distracting he may find your mere presence beside him, he's enjoying himself. This is by far the longest the two of you have hung out together, without the additions of his roommates and other friends. He dreads the moment that the movie ends and he’s obligated to tell you goodnight before reluctantly going back to his own apartment.

During the second act of the movie, he wonders what you’re thinking - if you could possibly be feeling the same way as him – when you randomly sit forward, grab the box of the leftover pizza off of the table in front of you, and stand to take it to your refrigerator.

It's then that he picks up on an odor – not the light floral aroma of your perfume but something new. A scent that answers the question of exactly what you had been thinking about. It’s musky and pheromonal, and even though it’s been a while since Logan has been intimate enough with a woman to smell the scent of her arousal, he recognizes it right away.

When you sit back down beside him, the sweet smell washes over him again and he bites the inside of his lip so hard that he tastes blood. The wound disappears as quickly as it’s formed, but the same can’t be said for the erection that begins to strain against the confines of his boxers.

He eyes the pile of small, decorative pillows that you had tossed to the side and wishes that he could grab one to place over his lap.

The words that you’d said to Vanessa a few days ago begin replaying in his mind for the thousandth time since he’d first heard you say them, reminding him this isn’t one-sided. He may be sitting here attempting to conceal a raging hard-on by shifting his position and subtly adjusting his pants, but Logan’s heightened sense of smell tells him that your underwear are probably starting to feel as uncomfortable as his do at the moment.

Without turning his head, he risks a glance at you. Your eyes are on the movie, and your face is neutral, but your posture gives you away. Your arms are crossed over your chest, the tips of your fingernails digging tiny crescent shaped indentations into the flesh of your upper arm. You have one of your thighs crossed over the other, locked together tightly but that doesn’t stop him from being able to smell how fucking wet you are.

“You know, if my sense of smell is as good as my sense of hearing, then I think I have a pretty good idea of what you’re thinking about right now,” Logan starts, his voice low and gruff. He watches from his peripheral vision as you freeze, your form going rigid.

“But I’d really like to hear you say it.”

You turn to him, your eyebrows quirked but your face otherwise impassive.

“I’m not sure I know what you’re talking about. What exactly is it that you’d like to hear me say?” you ask innocently. You give him doe eyes that make his cock finish filling with blood.

He huffs a laugh, picking up on the way that your heartrate accelerates when you look at him.

“I'd like to hear you say what you said to Vanessa a few days ago,” he hums. “I can’t remember exactly, but I think it had something to do with you rubbing your sweet little cunt on my abs. Does that sound familiar to you?”

“Hm,” you feign contemplation. “That doesn’t really sound like something I'd say.”

He knows you’re trying to play it cool, but there’s certain things that you just can’t hide from him – like the way your heart is beating a mile a minute and the way your nipples have pebbled beneath the thin material of your tank top.

“You’re right. It doesn't sound like something you’d say,” he snorts, and leans in so that your face is just a few inches from his. “So imagine my surprise when I walked by your apartment to hear you talking about jumping my adamantium bones.”

He doesn't miss the way your breath catches in your throat or how your eyes flicker to his lips.

“You gonna do it? Or you just gonna keep thinking about it while you're sitting beside me?”

For a second, you say nothing and Logan struggles to read your expression. Then, without taking your eyes off of him, you slowly stand in front of the couch. You reach for the hem of your tank top and pull it over your head, leaving you naked from the waist up.

Logan's mouth goes dry. Suddenly, he's all out of smart remarks.

You hook your thumbs into the waistband of your pajama shorts, pushing them down your thighs along with your panties, and let them both drop to your feet all while holding his gaze.

With you now stark naked before him, he leans forward, grasping you by the backs of your thighs and pulling you onto his lap. You straddle him, gently pushing him back against the sofa.

He tugs his own shirt over his head while you undo his belt buckle and pop open the top button of his jeans, your hands fumbling when he sheds his shirt.

Logan doesn’t typically think too much about his physical appearance. He knows he’s in good shape, and thinks he’s conventionally attractive enough. But he could see himself getting a bit of an ego, if he had someone looking at him the way you are right now on a regular basis.

You help him shimmy his jeans and boxers down far enough for his cock to spring free. You take him in your hand, using your thumb to smear the thick bead of pre-cum across the head.

“You should be careful listening to people’s conversations outside of their doors,” you hum as you pump him in one hand. You hunch over, lowering your mouth enough to spit down his shaft, lubricating the length. You smirk, glancing up at him from beneath your thick eyelashes. “Other people might not react as happily as me.”

Fuck, he knows it’s been a long time since he's even felt anyone’s hands on him, but he feels a little pathetic at the way his balls are already tightening and feeling so heavy just from the way you’re languidly stroking him.

And as much as he’d love for you to keep your hands on him, there’s time for him later. Right now, what he wants more than anything is the feeling of your pussy on him.

He pulls your hand off of him and then tugs you over his erection, trying his hardest to ignore the way the wetness between your legs glides against the tip of his cock, until you’re flat against the hard expanse of his lower stomach.

“This is what you wanted, yeah?” He grunts. You whimper in response, tightening your thighs around his sides and rocking back and forth with the smallest amount of friction. “Don’t be holding back, wanna feel you make a mess on me.”

His words seem to erase any remaining reservation that you may have had. You brace your hands on his chest and begin dragging your center across his lower stomach, your slick coating the thick trail of hair that goes from his belly button to his waistline. With every backstroke, the head of his cock juts against your ass.

You glide across him easily. Soft, wet, and warm, Logan thinks that if you feel this good on his fucking stomach then there’s no way he’ll be able to handle being inside you.

He leans his head forward, capturing one of your nipples in his mouth. You hold his head in your hands, tugging on his hair with your fingers as he teases your nipple with his tongue and teeth.

He pulls his mouth away from your breast with a wet pop. “You like this? Using me to get yourself off?”

“Mm-hmm,” you nod frantically, your answer coming out as a moan. He gives a quick, firm slap to your other breast. Judging by the sound it draws from you, you like it, so he does it again.

He'd pictured this exact scenario a shameful number of times in the last few days, but his thoughts hadn’t done you justice. Every little noise you make, every little whimper and moan as your clit brushes against the thick bulges of his muscles again and again, sounds sweeter than he could've dreamed.

He places his hands on the meat of your hips, guiding you forwards and backwards across his abdomen at a fast pace.

“Fuck,” you gasp, clenching your thighs around him as tight as you can. “Fuck, I’m gonna cum—”

“That’s right,” he coos. “Come on, cum on me.”

You dig your fingernails into his shoulders, drenching the hair on his stomach as you ride out your orgasm on him with a cry of his name.

You collapse against his chest, going still with your face in the crook of his neck as you steady your breathing.

“Look at me,” he whispers after a moment. It hits him that despite the fact that you just humped him until you came all over his abdomen, he somehow hasn’t even kissed you yet.

You pull away from his neck, looking down at him with a dazed expression. He brings your face to his mouth by the back of your neck. He wastes no more time, instantly slipping his tongue past your lips.

He holds you by the globes of your ass, which hovers just above his erection. You grind down, causing the tip of his cock to nudge against your entrance. He groans into your mouth, his cock past the point of feeling like it’s going to explode if he doesn’t fucking feel you.

“We can stop here,” he murmurs against your lips when he breaks the kiss, even though the thought kills him. He doesn’t want to stop kissing you, touching you, tasting you. It’s only been a few months, but it feels like he’s been waiting a lifetime for this and the last thing he wants is for it to come to an end. “Don’t have to go any further if you don’t—”

“No,” you exclaim with a breathy laugh. “No, I don’t want to stop. Do you want to stop?”

He grins up at you, taking his length in his hand and teasing it through your folds from below you. He coats the head in your juices before nudging it against your hole.

“Definitely don’t wanna stop, sweetheart.”

You sink down onto him at the same moment that he tilts his hips up enough to slip inside you, causing the entirety of his length to fill you at once.

You both go still, adjusting to the new sensation of each other. Your walls, velvet soft and so warm, constrict around him like a vice. He knows you’re likely tired from riding him through your first orgasm, so he begins thrusting his hips slowly, the tip of his cock nudging against your cervix.

“You’re big. So, so big,” you moan – something between a whine and a praise.

“I know, but you’re doing so good, honey,” he encourages as he eases himself in and out of you. “Don’t worry, I got you.”

You latch your lips to his again, and it’s hard for him to hold back. The feeling of your tight, perfect cunt around him and the taste of your tongue in his mouth is overwhelming. He wants to memorize every movement, every sound you make.

You snake your hand between your bodies, your fingertips finding your swollen clit and massaging languid circles. He feels you flutter around him as you start meeting his thrusts with movements of your own, and he knows you’re close.

“Not gonna last much longer, honey,” he grunts with a sharp thrust. “Feel too fucking good.”

“Cum with me,” you murmur against his mouth.

Your command causes something in him to snap. He releases a throaty growl, pistoning his hips upwards at a harsh pace as he fills you up from below. You constrict around him, crying his name into his ear as you ride out your climaxes together.

You collapse against his chest once more, his cock still nestled inside you. He loses track of how long the two of you stay like that, neither of you wanting to be the first to move.

“Remind me to eavesdrop on your conversations more often,” he huffs a laugh, still slightly out of breath.

You bring your lips to his, smiling as you give him a light kiss.

“I’ll know if you do. I have a doorbell camera. You didn’t notice that?”

thank you so much for reading <3 comments and reblogs are super appreciated. here are a few more of my favorite logan pieces that i've written ✨️

for always and ever is always for you - old man logan x healer reader

diet pepsi - old man logan x reader limousine sex

lavender and velvet - worst variant logan x neighbor reader

[olderthannetfic]

Of course people are being defensive, Spotify Anon. You rolled into the Fandom Old corner of Tumblr to tell us to examine our biases based on a streaming platform that only half of us even use at all.

Someome compared it to the f/f wank and they're right. If you accuse people of bullshit based on completely ufounded speculation, half of them will block you and the other half will explain to you why you're wrong. And we can't block other people's anons, so you're just going to have to endure a barrage of "this is bullshit and here's why". You asked for this, this is us examining the racial bias in our spotify wrapped and going "huh, it can't show bias if it doesn't exist" or "how does the fact that I listen to weird non-American music you've never heard of say anything about my feelings about the personhood and rights of American popstars I've never heard of?"

--

Spotify wrapped season is really popular broadly (though not so much around here) to the point that I find it very annoying since you apparently have to download the app to see wrapped??? I hate this season every year.

I use spotify via a browser, grudgingly, because some friends' fun guess-the-song stuff is on there. I had to use it at the fertility clinic because that's what they use to play music while injecting you with eggs. (I picked Mono if anyone is curious, but given how insanely painful being inflated with saline was, I should probably have picked D-2. I just thought it wasn't available because Spotify used to NOT FUCKING HAVE most of BTS' side projects because Spotify sucks donkey balls. Have I mentioned lately how much I resent the ubiquity of this piece of garbage? Have I?)

The thing that gets me that I hadn't quite worked out until just now is that 100 songs is the precise right amount to feel huge and significant without actually being so. Top 100 albums or artists is still an illusion of knowing what someone listens to. (Spotify has been improving, but they still routinely don't have the stuff I want.) But at least there, by the time you get to my 100th most listened to artist for a year, you might have some kind of picture of what I listen to.

Now, if you only listen to prog rock on vinyl, maybe your top 100 songs represent about 50 albums. >:D But let's say you're listening to some modern albums with bonus tracks and shit on Spotify. Your top 100 might be March When I Broke Up And Listened To The Same Five Albums Day And Night. No matter how diverse and interesting the rest of your musical diet, your bland-ass breakup playlist is now ninety out of one hundred songs on your Spotify Wrapped for this year.

I think it's that previously not totally conscious thought about how many 100 songs really is that was annoying me until just now.

Sure, it's just one scenario, but I think this sense of what 100 songs means is what's really annoying me about how people go on about Wrapped. Not just here and about racism: All the mainstream blathering about Wrapped annoys the shit out of me too every damn year.

It's a little like kudos. The top 200-500 most kudosed things in a big fandom may well show some pattern I find interesting. The top 100 most kudosed things show that people like that daily updating omegaverse crossover ship epic with Tony Stark.

Okay, okay, with kudos, you could probably exclude the top 10-30 depending on fandom size, but you know what I mean. Your last 100 fics read mean little, IMO. Your last 100 fandoms read, which is likely to be significantly more than 100 fics, is interesting to me.

It's my usual Numbers Are Deceptive complaint about how people love stats but do not contextualize things well.

[thedemonsurfer]

TSAMS Theory: Solar Flare wasn't real

So, here's the thing. Solar Flare's final exchange with Eclipse, when they're waiting to die, has this very painful and bittersweet part in it.

Solar Flare: You are not a good man. You are not a good person in any regard. But-- you did care. Even if you could never show it. You are just like him. Eclipse: Who? Solar Flare: The first Moon.

Oof oof ouch my heart. The art folks did with Eclipse having Moon's hat here was *chef's kiss*

But, wait. Hold on.

How the fuck would Solar Flare know anything about Old Moon?!

Consider the timeline. Eclipse builds Solar Flare, steals his body. Approximately 5min later Sun shows up to kill him. Eclipse gets away, tricks Sun into destroying Moon's magic circle. With no magic to find a solution to the looming threat of being trapped inside his own head, Moon makes the decision to reset himself to split off KC, and his memories are wiped in the process.

Solar Flare met Moon a grand total of once, for about five minutes, to sabatogue Eclipse (Eclipse's NEW BODY?!). He otherwise didn't talk to anyone at all. I actually don't think he ever met Kill Code, even, which opens a whole other can of worms like "Was Kill Code even aware Solar Flare existed? Did he forget he told Eclipse to make them?"

So here's my theory: The Solar Flare that Eclipse meets when he goes into the mindscape, the one that's keeping him locked in a dying frame and reads him completely to filth with terrifying accuracy? That's not Solar Flare. Solar Flare is gone, deleted.

The person that Eclipse interacts with is himself. His own subconscious, which knows every little insecurity and doubt he tries to repress. Who knows his past, the things that fuel him, the things he's ignored or discarded.

It's not a completely baseless guess. Sun suffers from stress-related hallucinations, mostly from his guilt regarding Bloodmoon, but about others as well. And later on, with the rebuilt Eclipse, he straight hallucinates himself to talk to shortly before Lunar blows him tae fuck. The rebuilt Eclipse is post-star, but he's not too far removed from the person who was dying in a bunker orbiting the sun.

And... isn't that tragic to consider? 'Solar Flare' prevents Eclipse from uploading himself into a new body. He prevents him from escaping this hell he's put himself through. And if that 'Solar Flare' is really Eclipse...

...then he's holding himself back. He knows, on a not very deep level, that he's done. He won but it's a hollow victory, because the person who's attention he craved, his self-proclaimed rival, is gone. The person who's replaced him isn't interested in starting a new rivalry. Eclipse literally doesn't know what to do with himself-- he has no goals, no other ambitions. Full Megamind 'I didn't really think I'd get this far" going on here.

And the star is killing him. He knows it's killing him, and he makes an effort to prevent that... but what good will it do to keep living? The star was only ever a means to an end, a motivating McGuffin to keep Moon's attention. Eclipse wasn't meant to win, and he knows it.

'Solar Flare' is just a mask, a plausible external individual to voice the thoughts that Eclipse is trying to ignore, and a fabricated companion because Eclipse has never been completely alone like this.

Really is a bit pathetic, isn't it?

[elainsgirl]

no cause im tired of everything.

I'm sick of people talking about gwyn like shes the most important character ever. like yall don't actually care about her. they only like her cause shes involved with a batboy which is ridiculous. ("pro gwyneth" like be so fr... we barely know anything about her??? Like I like gwyn but stop making stuff up about her and saying shes saving the world.) that girl didn't show any romantic feelings towards him, so stop forcing it. (not to mention they never talk about emerie... interesting)

why is azriel getting shipped with everyone?? "gwyn is azriel's mate!" "no, its eris" "no, its bryce" "no, its mor" "no, its rhys dead sister" I LAUGH SO HARD AT THESE CAUSE WHERE ARE YOU GETTING THIS FROM???? I bet if azriel breathes next to anyone, they will automatically assume its his mate! leave the guy alone, my gosh.

"his shadows hate elain" just shut up. like fr.

"elain can go to the spring court and be with tamlin while az gets with gwyn and lucien gets with vassa" BAHAHAHAHAH. bro i cant even say anything to this because its ridiculous.

"if az finds his real mate, he will leave elain in a hurry" BRO. why do you guys think this man world revolves around wanting a mate so badly???? yall think so low of him its weird. if he wanted a mate oh so badly... he wouldnt go for elain! get that in your dumb heads!

now with the bonus chapter (elain and az part) im iffy about it. its good at the start but rhys and az argument gave me the ick but I understand what he meant either way. I can see why people didnt like azriel here. but to call him entitled is just WILD! he wasnt wrong questioning the cauldron. like why is he having all these mate behaviors towards elain when she has a mate??? I'd question the cauldron, too. feyre was so real when she said "why not make them mates" because they lowk fit no matter what anyone says.

now this was really irks me. "3 brothers and 3 sisters is so cliche" cliche??? bestie- do you see what we are reading??? the answer to the riddle was "love" out of all things. shut up with that dumb excuse. we have never seen 3 brothers and 3 sisters yet- well I havent. im pretty sure most of you havent either. if you read the BOOKS, you will understand that sjm uses the word 3 a lot. this is just common sense, people love to twist stuff.

Now dont get me wrong, I'll go for elucien or elriel. I dont care. but these gwynriels made me dislike az and gwyn together. like I used to go along with it but now they force it so badly "READ THE BONUS CHAPTER" "DID YOU READ THE BONUS CHAPTER" "maKe suRe yOu rEad iT cArEfuLly" "he chuckled with her" "they glance at eachother" "az and gwyn are going to save the world together" "i hope nesta, emerie, gwyn and az leave and make their own court" < (I fr saw someone say something like this) sister... I literally cringe! just please stop.

btw elriels gwyn isnt evil. stop saying that.

im so sorry for this rant. it just had to be said.

lmfao the need to vent is so real. This fandom TESTS your patience at times.

I think one of my biggest annoyances with Gwynriel is the fact that Gwyn doesn’t even like Azriel that way. Instead of focusing on how far she’s come, her accomplishments etc everything seems to go back to Azriel. If you ever truly look At gwynriel theories and headcanons the focus is always on Az and Gwyn doesn’t have much of a story by herself, she doesn’t lead a story. She is a follower/tag along. I will always say this again and again: If she was that important to the point of having anything to do with the prisons, trove, TT/Gwydion she would have been introduced earlier on in the series. It’s that simple. She has nothing to do w the prison, Koshei or even the daggers/made objects. Everything about gwynriel is forced - from Gwyn and Az having feelings for each other to their plot. Barely anything of that ship makes sense when you truly start to unravel it.

Az is getting shipped with everyone except who he truly wants and thats just comical. I guarantee you, If Az interacted with any other woman - gwynriel shippers would split so fast and some will start shipping him with the new woman.

“His shadows hate elain” … why were they ready to strike Nesta all because she insulted elain? They also speak so can’t they literally just tell Az “hey man, we dont like elain”. Then part of this claim comes from the fact Elain made his shadows skitter which is something Az does himself.

I so want Elain to go to Spring and mention how she finds it stiffling/claustrophobic. Elain going to spring to live there is ignoring everything about her character and only focusing on the fact she likes flowers and by their own logic, Nesta should go to Day and Feyre to a more artistic court.

If Az soley wanted a mate and was so desperate for one - why on earth is he pining for someone WITH A MATE. It literally defeats the purpose of him getting a mate. Also its such a stilt to his character for him to want a mate and then get one. It doesn’t allow character growth and makes the idea of “mates” seem as a prize instead of this romantic connection. If he wanted a mate so badly, this man would be going after women with no mates. Not one that has a mate. The logic behind this arguement is so stupid,

Azriel’s bonus to me parallels Feyre’s whole scene where she questioned the cauldron because of Azriel. It was Sjms way of bringing it back and reminding us of it. Telling us “look! Another character is doubting elucien’s bond! Why is Az questioning the cauldron” etc. The only part of Azriel’s bonus where I got the ick aside from his and gwyns’ awkward conversation- is when he said Lucien doesn’t deserve Elain. I get where that statement was coming from but he isn’t someone to decide who deserves who. This is what doesn’t make sense: antis call Az entitled for simply WONDERING why Elain was given to Lucien, he hs made no move to break elucien up. He hs not forced anything onto Elain. He doesn’t dictate or control her interactions with Lucien, the fact he hadn’t planned a future for them either all show he is far from acting entitled. But eluciens needed a way to make Az seem bad and lucien better hence why latched onto this argument when it doesn’t make sense given what we know about Azriels character, his thoughts, actions and what he said in the bonus.

“3 sisters and 3 brothers is cliche” whilst reading a romantasy series ( a genre filled with repetitive cliches) by an author who claims to be the queen of cliches. Every single fated mates ending up together? Cliche. Omg the trainer and his trainee fell in love? How unique. Its not like that is also a popular trope. I cannot give you any book/s in which 3 sisters end w 3 brothers, I however can pull out multiple books with the fated mates/warriors/trainerxtrainee tropes.

Too bad. Mass loves the IC - There is no reason why Nesta/valkryies and Az would go to another court. Wait - but the night court is Azriels home. Its where he belongs, unlike Elain who has to leave…but now they want Az to leave too? One thing you can trust antis to do is be consistent with their inconsistencies. Honestly, I was open to the idea of gwynriel but genuinely none of their theories or HCs make sense. In a general sense gwynriel is a good ship sure but you can generally ship any two characters together from the series. It doesn’t mean it’s happening & they’ll be endgame.

Gwyn definitely isn’t evil. However I do think she has the potential to become morally grey which im all here for.

[whatspastisprologue-blr]

I stayed up far too late last night to watch S1E1 of The Newsreader on AMC+ because I'm making it my mission to watch other things IWTV actors have done and...

I love it! I was so disappointed there was only one episode so far because I NEED MORE! I think I went through the full range of human emotion at least once in that single episode. I was laughing, cheering, yelling profanity and creative threats at some of the characters, hugging my pillow, collapsing sideways onto the couch. My heart broke. I kept pausing it to appreciate a detail I'd noticed. I was a mess!

Like, the show is set in the 80s but the show itself has a very 80s vibe, so I was just taking in the costuming and set design. These characters go through, or watch, very real things (like the Challenger explosion) and then go report on it, proud they've done a good job doing so (which, yeah, it's their job; I just found it jarring). The old has-been reporter complaining about glamor in the news to the old boss guy while Helen's absence from the screen results in a severe ratings drop. The has-been reporter dude's wife so far seeming like a "pick me" and so far not getting any praise for it. Modernizing the way the news is presented and the folks holding it back. Helen is amazing.

But Dale.... Like, Dale and Lestat are played by the same person, so of course there's going to be similarities in appearance. There were definitely a few expressions I noticed that were the same. And while I'm keeping in mind keeping in mind that we've barely seen the real Lestat, I had fun seeing all the differences as well as the things that could be shared. At first, I just really wanted to know what made the IWTV casting director look at him, playing this awkward dork with questionable singing ability, and say, "Ah, yes, this guy should be the Vampire Lestat. The vampire. The one who becomes a rock star."

And then I realized that he spent a good chunk of the episode's start running around on the verge of a panic attack, he cried multiple times, and he just has major heart eyes for Helen, who I assume is his love interest. Like, I think he'd do whatever she told him (at least for now). And suddenly things began to click into place.

I just remember sitting there listening to Dale sing in the car and being impressed that the same actor, a few years later, would do, "Long Face".

Anyway, that's my rambling for now. Can't wait for more episodes!

Oh, actually, one more thing, because I'm curious. Is anyone else ever surprised by how deep Sam's voice is? It's happened to me a few times when I've done IWTV rewatches: I get caught off guard because his voice is always deeper than I expected. And then it happened again with S1E1 of The Newsreader. And it's not that I expect him to have a high pitched voice or anything; I just forget it's *that deep*. I don't know why. Is it just me?

[ranticore]

im so curious about the kitchen nightmares au, is félix a waiter? are erica and jean creating crimes against the culinary arts in the back? why is esk of all people gordon ramsay

relevant background info was that when i first got my ipad and was getting to grips with procreate, i was also drafting the first go at mvf so i was drawing mostly refs and character designs, and while i was doing that on an ipad i realised that i could, for the first time ever, watch something on another screen while drawing. guess what i watched

this super old art was one of my first paintings all in procreate and i did it while watching kitchen nightmares. love the show (uk version only), it's absolutely terrible and fake and ramsay sucks but something Compels me

i drew a series of fake interview portraits for all main characters of mvf, as different staff members in a failing restaurant on the show. esk who was kind of the straight man/critical voice of the group ended up being the celebrity chef

anyway the basic plot is they work at a tacky outdated italian trattoria with all that entails, that serves french cuisine, in the year 2005. the restaurant was a money laundering front owned by helena but she was an absentee owner who would deny any claim over the restaurant flaws and be generally away & uncooperative

the restaurant was failing because it looked awful and the food was not good but also because the staff could not work well with one another and the constant arguments that customers would overhear was turning them off

the person who called in gordon ramsnake was the restaurant manager, Félix, in a very roundabout attempt to try to bring heat down on Helena

general overview of the staff & their flaws

Manager (Félix) - actively embezzling from the business, basically a middle manager tyrant trying to control everyone else, ambition of becoming the owner one day (and then they'll ALL see). Would deflect the blame for the restaurant's issues onto every single other person except Francis because he can do no wrong ever. Aw jeez guys we just don't know where the money is going!! Don't look at his meticulously-kept, well-hidden balance books or his incongruously nice car. He looks like the sleaziest businessman you have ever seen.

Head Chef (Jean, you guessed right) - confrontational and rude, could not accept criticism no matter what and would pick fights with customers who sent the food back. He could cook decently but only to his own schedule and preference. The type to go "my food is perfect and nobody can teach me anything" before esk convinces the owner to hire a new head chef who can actually listen to feedback. His prized menu hasn't changed in 7 years.

Front of House (Islin) - zero charm or charisma but otherwise pretty sincere, though it IS weird that an ordained priest is working here and not in a church somewhere. He explains in an interview around the back of the restaurant that he's identified a new route to finding converts because just knocking on people's doors hasn't had a good return. He has zero interest in any aspect of the restaurant experience. Attempts to preach to most of the diners.

Head Waiter (Erica) - he's clearly had no training and is never where he's supposed to be at any given time, and it almost looks like he's ambushing the diners while they're mid-bite on purpose. Calculated bare-minimum work while spending most of his time in the kitchens for some reason. In the course of the episode it's discovered that he makes a decent cook and gets relocated. He had a habit of telling customers that the food was bad even if it wasn't.

Barman (Francis) - eager to please and maybe the only truly friendly face in the restaurant, he's the only reason anyone comes back. But he has an inconvenient habit of giving steep discounts to women, so the bar almost never turns a profit. There have been a few complaints about Barman's inappropriate advances from diners & the fact that his shirt is always a little bit too open. He seems to believe that there's nothing wrong with the place and it's a perfectly legit successful business, so it's hard to get through to him to change his behaviour. Won't hear a word of criticism against Félix or Islin.

Sous-chef (Léá) - hates it here hates every second of every day can't stand anyone wants to be out of there asap but she knows she lacks the experience to actually be a sous-chef in a legitimate restaurant, which means she'd take a pay cut if she tried to find work anywhere else, so she's trapped. She has a habit of throwing parsley garnish far too liberally over every single dish because she read in a book from the 90s that this is how you get a Michelin star

Rival Restaurateur (Senca) - she runs an equally tacky fake unpopular italian trattoria across the street and she's been trying to get Helena's one shut down for years by doing various etsy badluck curses and getting the hygiene inspectors called on them but it hasn't worked yet. She suggested to Félix that maybe trying to get the restaurant on TV would draw enough negative attention to get it shut down (and then he could reopen it of course). She's a bit surprised he actually went and did it even though the show could not have been less flattering towards him and he's essentially turbo-nuked his own reputation into the dirt forever. But she's waiting behind the scenes to make an insultingly-cheap offer and then they'll ALL see

over the course of the episode the above flaws are identified. esk attempts to propose a remodel of the tired décor which is fiercely resisted by Félix because he kind of likes the fake tuscany look but eventually he gives in and the place is given a modern and fresh feel. it draws a crowd on its reopening night but the staff struggle to meet the demand, unused to such numbers, and it ends up with Jean refusing to cook and walking out (he's fired shortly after).

they regroup and organise a charming promo event where they serve real french cuisine in a stall outside (oysters mostly) to draw customers for a new lunchtime service. this is well-received because new Head Chef Léa (now even MORE trapped in a role she has no real claim to) doesn't have to cook the oysters so she can't fuck them up. Félix actually tries to be receptive to the staff he's managing, for once, and he does a good job of supporting them and finally effectively managing the floor.

episode ends with Esk walking away and wondering if it left the restaurant in good hands, concluding that "only time will tell". there's a sequence of the restaurant's one successful lunch service, everyone smiling and working well and diners happy, with the text "RESTAURANT closed its business in August 2005, three months after the filming of this episode".

Esk goes back to interview the owner and ask why it failed, and Helena just explains that she sold it and moved on while dodging every other question. Esk berates her for having no passion for the business, calls her lazy and immature, and she simply walks out of the interview.

[kassian-ck]

I might do a whole ass series of posts regarding Miguel and Robby just staring at each other an analyzing what might be going on behind those glances. The writers sucked at giving them the depth they deserved, but giving credit where credit is due, they do know sometimes how to show and not tell, and the quiet glances that they give to each other from time to time does that pretty nicely in my opinion. Xolo and Tanner also help bring these messages across so kudos for their acting 🗣🔥

Or I could be completely wrong and they just staring at each other cause oh they're rivals grrrr.

ALSO THANK YOU EVERYONE for the feedback in the last post. I didn't think so many people would read what I wanna say. Yall real ones 😭🫂

So this time, I'm going alllll the way back to season 3 to talk about a scene that goes pretty under the radar when it comes to them and I think is really interesting (excuse the quality):

This one is a bit long ngl

Getting what's very telling out of the way – is insane that Miguel's look here barely resembles any kind of anger or hatred towards Robby. The situation isn't really the best for him to bring up any of that and he knows that, but Miguel isn't exactly the best at hiding his emotions, and to hide any (justifiable) anger he had towards Robby after what happened during the school fight wouldn't have been easy at all for him.

His experience was insanely traumatic. That's not something you can simply forget, nor your mind nor your body. But yk the writers, they don't actually like to explore anything with Miguel in depth–

Finding each other after going through one of, if not the hardest and most traumatic events of their lives at that point must have brought up pretty complex emotions they aren't sure what to do with. When they meet in Miyagi Do earlier in the season, Robby does resort to his anger from how betrayed he feels by the people he thought he could trust completely turn his back on him (in his pov). There might have been resentment towards Miguel, but I feel like that act of throwing a punch at him was more out of impulse caused by a fresh wound and the behavior he had to keep for months in juvie.

In this scene, Robby is angry but I heavily doubt any anger is directed towards Miguel at that moment. Instead, they look at each other blinking slowly as if it was hard to believe that they were in the presence of the other now that the situation had nothing to do with their rivalry.

Especially for Miguel. Not only for what happened between them but for what he thought of Robby once he saw him stepping out of the dojo right behind Kreese.

He didn't look angry. Man, he barely even seemed angry towards Robby regarding his injury compared to how he was with Johnny. Because even if he didn't know much about Robby, he did know one thing about him. Miyagi Do is about honor and balance, and he's seen Robby uphold those teachings with pride since the first time he fought him in their first tournament. Something that he massively lacked and nearly loss complete sight of when Kreese came into the picture.

Even if they weren't in the best terms in season 2, Miguel at least esteemed Robby's honor and balance the more he saw that Cobra Kai's teachings didn't have those principles he himself believed in. Maybe at some point he saw that what Robby did to him wasn't out of revenge or out of pure hatred towards him, it was because he was angry and he let his emotions take control, causing an accident that he knew the Robby he fought against in the tournament would have immediately regretted.

So to see this Robby come out, wearing a Cobra Kai gi and taking the side of the same old man who's philosophy nearly pushed him towards a very dangerous ideology had to feel like being hit by a truck. Because as much as it might be hard for him to admit it due to his ego, Robby was supposed to be better than him. He was supposed to be more honorable and with more integrity than him; to see that the rhetoric Cobra Kai wants to push isn't the right way to do things.

How was somebody like Robby now in the same position he was in? In the position that brought them to where they were in the first place? Miguel can only guess so much with what he knows from Johnny. He doesn't know that he's pretty much homeless or that his mom isn't available for him. He barely knows what he went through in juvie, or how Johnny chose him over his biological son and how that made him feel.

He's completely left in the dark wondering why Robby didn't care anymore. Thus, looking perplexed as he does in the scene.

If this is the case, he might have been the only one of the teens to see Robby past the mistakes that were made and past the choices he took from the very beginning. He wanted to understand what was going on, but who was he to even approach him?

This is why in season 4 I honestly would have loved it if they had fought instead of Eli fighting Miguel. Keep Eli winning, I liked that he won the tournament a lot, but just give Robby and Miguel a fight 🙏 It's not a 1:1 parallel but since they have pretty much flipped sides, it would force them to look at the other in the eye and notice sides of each other that they have not seen in earlier fights, giving them a sense of deja vu yet see what made this different. We could have gotten Robby's reaction to Miguel feeling a sharp pain in his lower back too after attempting that jumping kick. I feel this way the tournament could have had so much more weight emotionally, and it could have added another layer to the relationship that could work well with Robby ultimately turning away from Cobra Kai and deciding to stay in Mexico to search for Miguel with his dad.

[worriedvision]

Wrong person! - Gorou

Gender neutral reader, reader is friends with Kazuha and is ecstatic to receive a message from their crush that he's asked them on a date. Angst here again sorry not sorry

--

Gorou: Hey, I was wondering if you'd have some time to go for a drink. I know you're busy, but if not I'd love to have some time with you!

-

When you receive that message, you gasp and excitedly show it to Kazuha, who seemed pleasantly surprised by your message from Gorou.

You had gushed to Kazuha about your feelings, and he could have sworn Gorou was just treating you the same way he treated anyone else. When you talk about his smile, and Kazuha happened to see from another angle his smile, he'd see that the smile happened because he saw someone else. He didn't want to tell you that he was just nice like that, so he was preparing mentally for telling you to cheer up with some sweet treats and lots of hugs. His comrades would be treated more favourably than yourself

"I'm so happy for you." Kazuha smiles as you quickly type a reply.

--

You: of course! It's been a while since we talked, and I would like to catch up as well!

--

The day comes along quick, and you've really made an effort to look nice - nice scent, outfit, some tasteful makeup and even planning your next meetup before this one started to sweep Gorou off his feet.

When Gorou shows up, he flashes you that smile you always gushed about and you wave him over, him happily jogging over before promptly ordering some drinks. It's like he gets a new light in his eyes, hopeful to start something new.

"Before we start, I have to admit something..." Gorou starts, laughing away his nerves before looking away. He can feel your confused eyes on him, and he immediately regrets bringing this up. The person he had asked out was his superior, he knew deep down he had no chance with them.

"You weren't meant to receive that message." He begins, you tilting your head in confusion.

"So what did you mean to type to me?" You ask, genuinely curious.

"...I didn't mean to send anything to you. I meant to-" before he can complete his sentence, he hears you tense up. Looking over, his heart sinks as he notices all of your enthusiasm for the day completely dissipate.

"...I see. Silly me!" You reply, flinching when you hear how loud the second half was. "I should have known you were just being nice to me, and it wasn't directed for me."

"Wait, please-" Gorou starts, you standing up. He wanted to be clear that he went on to ask the person he meant to ask, and they promptly and kindly turned him down and told him it wouldn't have worked out regardless because of the ranking difference.

"I'll avoid you, don't worry. I've been so stupid being excited for this." You babble out, tears actively rolling down your face not out of sadness, but rather the sheer embarrassment of knowing you were too stupid to see what everyone else did.

"_, let's give this-" Gorou tries to soften the blow, seeming to still want this drink. What happened with the conversation with his actual love interest, you didn't know.

But in this moment, you weren't curious. You didn't care anymore. You just wanted to leave, your tears causing you to be an obvious target for prying eyes. You feel like you're losing composure, and you see Gorou looking uncomfortable. You tell yourself in that moment you should have just waited before replying that quickly to the message. You feel yourself being lightly guided away by someone before they stop at a familiar stop. They wrap their arms around you, and a familiar voice soothes you.

"Let out your tears." Kazuha soothes. "There's no use bottling up this betrayal."

You didn't know what Kazuha was doing there, but you think he probably had the connections to know what was supposed to happen. Gorou couldn't even shoot you a quick 'so sorry, wrong person'. He could have even made up a lie saying he was too busy, or I'd he did want to meet up with you after the conversation not being up the intention at all!

"I really filled myself up for something that wasn't supposed to happen, how will I be able to show up to work with him knowing this?" You wail into his chest, Kazuha hushing you soothingly before wrapping his arms tightly around you.

"You'll realise that there are better bachelor's for you than him." Kazuha states. "People that do genuinely think of you more warmly than just a friend." Kazuha massages the back of your head, feeling you still tense.

"But for now, I think you need to focus on yourself and the many positives you possess."

[mixterglacia]

CONTENT WARNING: Vivziepop Critical/ Stolitz Critical below the cut.

This episode made me incredibly angry, so it's not going to be as well structured as I try to manage.

TL;DR The pacing and tone was a horrible mess, and this should have been split into at least two episodes to pull this off.

To start, we prove in the first five minutes how little these two actually know each other. They're surprised by very simple things and I don't like that. It tells me that neither of them, but especially Stolas, EVER asked about the other's interests. Cool, that's good to know I was right about that the whole time.

Blitz is WILDLY out of character in the bulk of this episode. I LOATHE how he's waiting on Stolas hand and foot. If we're being honest, he'd probably just say "figure it out yourself" and focus on his life, business, and daughter. Why are we always having to baby Stolas' feelings? It feels like he's the only one allowed to actually be doted on. (In a non-humorous way.)

And now he remembers Via? Sure, just run off without thinking about your family. You have never let that stop you before. And now Stella is being cartoonishly evil in front of her daughter? We've never had it proven that she's a bad mother. In fact, from what Via states later, that's the case! I really think they have no idea on how to be subtle with her.

In a similar vein to the moment with Blitz watching the family later. You didn't need to tell us who he was imagining in that window. The moment worked without you punching it down our throats.

Likewise with Millie's pregnancy. I wish they'd left that as an open thread, rather than taking time to fully confirm it. Like maybe all the way up to the point where she went into the bathroom and left looking a little fucked up? That way it can be an engaging thing to return to in S3.

The non-drama parts of the episode (especially the first five minutes) dragged HARD. They gutted any emotional moments and just felt like padding for the runtime.

I am so annoyed at the way this show is trying to lessen what Stolas did.

HE CHEATED ON HIS WIFE. HE DESTROYED HIS FAMILY. HE ABANDONED HIS DAUGHTER. HE IS A TERRIBLE MAN WHO GETS EVERYTHING HE WANTS BECAUSE THE SHOW BABIES HIM.

This is not some cute little quirk. His wife was never implied to cheat on him first. She was a bitch, but she didn't do anything to deserve this. I can't stress enough that if you showed her playing around too, it would immediately solve most of the hypocrisy with this.

Trying to weasel around that by Blitz trying to say cheating really so bad is fucking gross. It's not like they had an open relationship and Stella got jealous. Stolas is a slimeball. He doesn't deserve Blitz. He doesn't deserve Via.

He hasn't earned any of this.

While it came out of nowhere, the Via song is STELLAR. As a product of divorce, she owes her father nothing. She deserves to feel so hurt and betrayed.

"My tears won't fall upon your shoulder...I'll just get older and you'll only know my name." Hit me like a truck.

So imagine my outrage when we aren't allowed to sit and think about her feelings for more than a few seconds after the song. We aren't allowed to focus on her pain. If they staged a sequence between the number and her finding her dad's pills, I think it would work better.

Or even uploading the song by itself. But no. You have to CONSTANTLY remind us to feel bad for the stupid fucking owl. Feel bad because he's depressed. Feel bad because he's trapped in the same loveless marriage as his wife. But don't feel bad for her because she's a bitch.

Fuck. Off.

My dad was manic depressive, that doesn't mean he got to treat our family the way he did. Stolas didn't even think about her before throwing his life away over his booty call.

This show has so much potential that it just squanders. There are two different series being forced together and it doesn't work. You have the comedy series shoved into the same sweater as the soap opera. They aren't mutually exclusive, but truly the team seems incapable of making this work.

I'm done.

This isn't even fun to critique anymore.

If folks want my opinions on future Helluva Boss content, you'll have to directly ask me to watch the piece in question. I'm still going to give S2 of Hotel a shot, but as far as this?

I'm throwing in the towel. Of the two, I was so excited for Helluva. I loved the characters, I loved the idea, and I truly loved the first couple episodes.

But that show doesn't exist anymore.

Once again, I'm going to take a moment to remind you all:

You are allowed to love this series. I am just a dude on the internet. I am not trying to change your mind. I am not trying to ruin your fun. If you love it, that's awesome. I am so happy you found something that sings to your soul.

Don't let me harsh your buzz. Okay?

[jimmycarterghostland]

I finished my Worm read days ago. I'm going to discuss how I feel about the entire story as a whole here.

Some background: I discovered the web serial Worm years ago. I was either searching for the longest story or was searching for one that was one million words long. Either way, one of those things led me to Worm. Instead of reading it properly, I spoiled a bunch of stuff about it for myself, and would read random scenes out of order. And I would look up Reddit posts about the story. I tried giving it a proper read years back, but didn't get very far.

Months ago, I started that proper beginning-to-end read. A couple of days ago, I finished that read. I read the entirety of Worm. And it was worth it.

Before I started that read, I thought the Travelers were pretty cool. I ended up resenting them during my read. Not only were they rude to Taylor, but the Travelers didn't even like each other. That made it even harder for me to care about them, because they showed no care for anyone else.

Heartbreaker and his children, the Heartbroken, fulfilled this very specific trope of mine that probably doesn't even have a name. I don't know why, but I love it when a fictional male character has a lot of children by different women, making those children have a lot of half-siblings. Thragg from the Invincible comics fulfilled this trope too.

Heartbreaker was a villain I wanted to see a lot more of. He definitely had a lot of potential. I wish Wildbow had given him a bigger role in the story. I don't even think Heartbreaker had any dialogue. I wish Accord had had a bigger role, too, because he was another minor villain I found interesting, but at least Accord still had a decent amount of appearances in the story.

Speaking of Heartbreaker, his two kids Regent and Cherish were interesting. I actually liked Regent a lot. I was surprised that Cherish genuinely hated him and that the feeling was mutual. For a while, I thought that Cherish was going to betray the Slaughterhouse Nine and maybe team up with Regent and develop a friendly bond with him. I wanted that to happen. It didn't happen, though. Cherish ended up getting a fate worse than death. I feel bad for her, to be honest. I wouldn't wish her fate on my worst enemy.

I wish Regent had survived. He was a cool character. RIP.

My favorite character was Tattletale. At first, anyway. I think Taylor was my favorite by the end of the story.

Worm is the only superhero novel I've read. Reading it was nostalgic for me. When I was a kid, I loved reading superhero comics and watching superhero movies. The X-Men comics, movies, etc. is my favorite superhero fiction. Reading Worm fed my childhood obsession with superheroes. In general, people with superpowers forming teams and fighting other people with superpowers is something I love to watch or read. My own web serial, which I'm currently rewriting, has that.

I loved the dialogue in Worm. It was one of my favorite things about it. Those chapters during the final battle, when Taylor couldn't understand English, the lack of dialogue was a pain. Not just because a lack of dialogue can be boring, but also because Wildbow writes dialogue so well. I loved it when the characters in Worm would just talk to each other. And I love how characters tended to have unique vocabulary. Sometimes it fit their personality too, like Skidmark and his love for disgusting, inappropriate speech, because he's a disgusting, inappropriate person.

Something I had a problem with, though: a lot of times it wasn't clear which character was talking, and sometimes it was clear which character was talking but wasn't clear which one they were talking to during a group conversation. All of that happened a lot in Worm. Sometimes a dialogue tag would've been nice, with either a name or a pronoun.

The introspection was great. The inner thoughts of the characters never felt repetitive or anything. Sometimes certain phrases were used too much, like "The object was long as he/she was tall". And there were other repetitive phrases, but the introspection always felt fresh. I never had the impression a character was thinking the same thing took much.

Wildbow uses similes pretty well. I loved his descriptions. Sometimes I would read a sentence or a paragraph and understand exactly what a character was feeling. There was this one part when Taylor describes the terror she felt being like a gun being pointed at her for a long time, with her fear not rising or going down. I wish I could find that paragraph again.

The characters. The characters in Worm were amazing. They were so diverse with their own unique beliefs and motivations. It was realistic. A lot of them felt like real people. And there's some great character development. And because a bunch of the characters repeatedly make appearances throughout the novel, you see a lot of them and they make the book feel realer, and more "lived-in".

Worm is technically a multiple point of view novel. It's mainly told from Taylor's point of view, but it has a bunch of other narrators too. Wildbow is a master of multiple POV, which is also my favorite point of view to read and to write. The narrators in Worm have personalities and beliefs that show in the writing. Wildbow knows how to use introspection to demonstrate that. In the racist Hookwolf's interlude, he refers to Shatterbird as the racist term for her race, because he is racist. His inner thoughts fit his character. A non-racist character in Worm wouldn't have used that term. They would have used the proper word for Shatterbird's race. Hookwolf also has a hatred for cornrows, which is another example of his racism. When I read Hookwolf's interlude, I really got the sense that he was racist. Good job, Wildbow.

Worm has a lot of great instances of "show, don't tell". Like when he describes Leviathan as moving slower, because he's weaker, but Wildbow doesn't explicitly say that Leviathan was getting weaker. I loved that. Sometimes the reader has to figure things out for themself. There were some satisfying instances where Wildbow didn't spell out the obvious. I liked that.

I like how smart the characters were. Fictional characters being hopelessly stupid is something I really hate, but there was none of that in Worm. It was like everyone in this book was smart. Smart characters acting genuinely smart makes fiction more thrilling and fun to read or watch. It was satisfying to read intelligent characters showing actual cleverness. There was none of that "This character is stated to be smart but never does anything smart" nonsense.

One example of a character being genuinely clever in Worm is when Coil asks Dinah the chance of various individuals in their group, including themselves, surviving an upcoming attack, after she says there's a chance she will die in the next half-hour. The percentages is around the same for each of them. Coil does this to see if the attack will be an attack on all of them as a whole. This was clever. Another smart moment is when Taylor deliberately confuses Bonesaw to delay her attempt to get to Taylor's brain(which Taylor doesn't want to happen. Bonesaw is a really bad person). This moment probably wasn't extremely clever, but I think in real life most people would just pointlessly beg the bad guy to stop instead of actively trying to delay them.

Characters in Worm use their powers intelligently during fights, and that's what made reading this novel even more fun. It was intriguing.

I also love the stakes gradually get higher. The most dangerous villain is fought at the end, which is a good thing. Because the final battle in a book or other piece of media should be when the stakes are highest. If Scion was defeated in the middle of the novel and Lung was the final enemy to defeat instead, that would've been a terrible writing decision by Wildbow. Villainous Scion was much more of a threat than Lung was.

I really loved this novel. I wish more books were as great as this one. Worm is actually the web serial that made me start taking web serial seriously. I hope I will someday write a serial that's as great as Worm.

My rating for Worm:

4 out of 5 stars.

[freaky-flawless]

Alright I finished it... just overall not great. I don't really feel like I gained anything from reading it. And there are a good few things that are genuinely problematic.

As for the story itself...it could have been interesting but the writing was so bland. There's a scene at the end that should have been pretty intense where the Ghoulfriends confront the big bad and save the whole school but the writing is so straightforward and bland that it was so unsatisfying. And the solution was so weird and specific.

I know we kinda joke about how useless Bloodgood is, but she was something else in this one. She didn't even get brainwashed like everyone else, from the start she was super ooc and forgetful because she got struck by lightning lol. Lowkey, she shoulda got fired.

I will say Rochelle did grow on me a bit. She definitely had the main character role and did show some character growth. And I did like how the author was mindful of the fact that she's made entirely of stone, and the trials that come with being that heavy. But her constant quoting of the "Gargoyle Code of Ethics" and her constantly correcting people grew old quick.

Other than that the only saving grace of this book is the illustrations. Ugh, they are so good, and I hadn't seen a lot of them before. Darko Dark did a great job, and I love his design for Sylphia (the "villain") he even made the trolls look cute despite the authors less than kind descriptions of them.

Do I recommend anyone read this? No, not really. Unlike the Lisi Harrison books, it didn't give a fresh perspective on the series, it's kinda just a worse version of the actual canon. And on top of that the writing itself is super lackluster, the Monster High Diaries books are way better written despite being half the length.

That being said, wish me luck with the next one. It appears Toralei might feature heavily in it, despite not being mentioned a single time in the first one.

I'm like halfway through the first Ghoulfriends book and main three are so annoying. I'm hoping it's like a character flaw thing, where they'll recognize it and get better over the course of the series, but oof. Gitty did these ghouls so wrong.

They're beefing with Cleo for no reason...Venus flipped out on her out of nowhere (in the middle of class, unprovoked!!) for using paper bags and then sprayed her with hypno pollen, meanwhile Rochelle, who is in her own relationship, is hardcore flirting with her man!!! I wish the author had been more original when it came to giving them a "frenemy" there are so many options aside from Cleo! (Honestly Operetta would have been an interesting choice, but whatever)

Robecca's characterization is the most tolerable, but she's incredibly rambly, and the author decided to give her a bad sense of time for...reasons. And despite being British, she uses oddly Southern phrases while talking...its super strange. With Venus and Rochelle, I can see where her mind went with writing their characters, but Robecca honestly seems so opposite to her canon personality.

And her backstory was kinda mangled too. It's acknowledged that she was disassembled, and recently reassembled, and even that she previously lived with Mrs. Kindergrubber, but she's treated like a brand new student. No acknowledgement that it was Ghoulia who put her back together!

I understand giving the characters a fresh take, but it would have been pretty simple to integrate the actual canon. Robecca and Rochelle were introduced in the same movie, they were new to Monster High, just not new to all of the characters.

[eyrieofsynapses]

person: hey listen up. what if Sherlock Holmes were, you know, queer--

me: *sitting forward* I'm listening (actually I was on the same page years ago)

person: right! SO what if Sherlock and Watson were gay--

me: ...you've lost me.

so anyway. anyone with aroace Sherlock and/or queerplatonic Sherlock & Watson takes, hmu, everyone else go home. you're valid and ily, you're great, but also: idc

[unproduciblesmackdown]

costume design, set mockup, and rehearsal photos from this guide to the show that's like really thorough in providing Context like, mini articles about the creators of the original movie, musical, and movie musical, about other versions of productions, the history, quotes of other commentary, interview quotes, context of other / preexisting genres like b movies, faustian stories, "what if a plant was weird" stories, glossary of terms (such as references that may generally be less obscure if you were in the '60s, e.g.), suggested further reading....haven't read it top to bottom but i think it's fantastic, link to the pdf as post source

[accursedthing]

This election was decided by a Democratic candidate that refused to campaign on anything but "I'll do as little as possible to change anything" to an overwhelmingly dissatisfied population. You can blame every individual voter who didn't do what you wanted them to, or you can blame one actor we all knew was doing it wrong, who was yelled at for months that they were doing it wrong, and did it anyway. Are we really going to blame the political actors and system that created this situation or a public whose voice is repressed at every opportunity? Be serious

[deadheaddaisy]

So anyone who follows me knows I am 100% a SatoReed shipper. But knowing this @pearlypairings and @more-better-words raised this possibility, and I've got to say, I can see it. It'll never replace my OTP - which really only kicks into gear in hypothetical Season 5 in my fics anyway - so let me brain dump on y'all.

Talas is a woman who knows what she wants, and as much as she's using Reed to get to the sphere, she's unlikely to be your standard honeypot operative. She's Andorian; while sex is nothing to be ashamed of, it's also not to be used lightly. She's unlikely to sleep with someone who doesn't interest her. And let's be real, Malcolm is very interesting to a soldier of her caliber.

OP is right; it's the one time on the show where Reed is shown as completely relaxed around a woman in whom he's interested. (Yes, he's completely relaxed around Hoshi outside of the enchiladas scene; they have incredible chemistry right from the frostbite scene, they really riff off and get each other, there were lots of little clues that more was brewing - but it never actually turned into anything on-screen.) So it's entirely plausible that Reed and Talas would have made one hell of a power couple if she hadn't been using him to get to the sphere.

I do think that if Talas had slept with Malcolm, she would have been ashamed of deceiving him. I don't think she's built to be a spy; she's a soldier and she doesn't like playing games (and neither did Shran, both likely feeling that it impugned their honour). I can get behind Reed & Talas hooking up and simply enjoying each other with the understanding that they weren't planning a relationship, but it being more fun than a standard one night stand.

There would very likely have been a meeting of minds and spirits - military backgrounds, both trained and skilled in intelligence and security work, both tactical officers on their respective starships, dedicated to their work and their crews, ready to do whatever they must to safeguard their species, but ready to work together to achieve their goals. Giving up their honour and ethics with a struggle and then only because it's what's needed for their missions to succeed, but not happy about it.

And let's be real, they are both freaking hot AF under those uniforms.

I think Talas' ulterior motives rattled her because she wasn't expecting to respect Reed as much as she did. She might have gone in with an attitude of, a one-night-stand with a soldier, okay sure, if nothing else she gets a decent lay out of it - and then she meets this man who's very much like her, and like Shran, dedicated and intense, a man of integrity - and it becomes more complicated than a simple honeypot.

And looking at relationships, he's not with anyone, there's no cheating, so why the hell not? He's a lot more relaxed and comfortable around Talas than he is with the Viznian (?) woman, the Orions, T'Pol during pon farr (ignoring the wisp since that wasn't actually him), etc.

That said, I'm not sure anything between Malcolm & Talas would necessarily be a long-term, committed relationship, given their similarities - I do think Malcolm needs someone who's not exactly like him, because I think he's quite fragile under that tough exterior, and I think Hoshi brings that combination of strength and warmth and implicit trust he needs to both give and take from a partner.

At the same time, that no-bullshit attitude of Talas' I think might also have helped Malcolm overcome his shitty self-esteem. Game recognises game, and Talas isn't going to waste her time seducing a weakling, in mind or spirit (his body is clearly not weak in any way). So I reckon she could have made great strides in flicking that switch that made him not just confident in his abilities, but in himself as a person.

So yeah, if I were to choose anyone other than Hoshi to ship with Malcolm? I'd be far more likely to ship Talas than pretty much anyone other than Shran (sorry Shranchers) (we were outright robbed of more Shran-Reed interactions and I bet there would have been flames on that bridge in Season 5 if Shran had joined the crew).

Admittedly I have read some really good Mayes, and again, the military background comes to the fore - I can see it playing a big role if he were to go for someone not Hoshi, who I think is both strong and gentle in the way he needs; but if not Hoshi, I'd really see him with Talas or Shran and then maybe Hayes before anyone else.

And the Andorian polycule opens up so many possibilities, not everyone would have to be super tough universal soldier, after all. So yeah, Malcolm and Talas are very much within the realm of possibility in my book. Hell, now I have brain tingles about a 6-strong squad, ffs.

(Of course, only if Hoshi is not in the picture, I'm not throwing over my OTP for anyone else, this is purely a what if exercise.)

Criminal how these two never went anywhere. They are. Made for each other. The trust issues. The military family. The unashamed flirting. It's the first time Reed has ever been normal around a woman in his entire life. She cured his daddy issues with 1 sentence.

She would have been the type of fiery and strong woman who always has strong opinions and wants to decide everything, and he would have been the "sure honey, whatever you want, your wish is my command :)" kind of man. UGH. We suffered a robbery.

[chocolate-cream-soldier]

-.-