#i FUCKING HATE THAT OTHER FUCKING SCHOOL I DON'T WANT TO
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dignitywhatdignity · 22 hours ago
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I'm a stay at home mom, and by necessary extension, a housewife.
I look like a fool in a flowy white sundress. I live in jeans and graphic t-shirts.
We don't have a backyard, much less a field of native wildflowers (I do try to grow native wildflowers in my shoebox-sized front garden).
I'm lucky, and also unlucky. My husband makes good enough money to support me not working; if I worked full time, I'd barely be covering daycare. I'm well aware how vulnerable that makes me.
I struggled, as a kid. I couldn't be a tomboy, because tomboy liked (and were good at) sports. I was a benchwarmer in softball. I lost every tennis match. I kept aging out of recreational and instructional leagues, and my parents and I agreed it was a waste of time and money for me to join competitive leagues, since I'd just be sitting there doing nothing. Even dance class, when it was obvious I was never going to compete, I was largely blown off by the instructors, who had future champions more worthy of the attention.
I wore a skirt every day -- school uniforms -- but i couldn't keep my knee socks up. I couldn't keep myself neat (typical adhd girl, I excelled in school as long as I could bite my nails or twirl my hair. So my nails and hair looked like shit).
I was among the top three in the class, with two boys. The boys hated me because I outperformed them. The girls... I think just didn't know what to do with me. I was probably annoying. I wasn't feminine enough. No doubt I was a bit of a know it all (but if you read books, you'd know it too! Why doesn't anyone else like books?!) .
It was a joke, an insult, to be romantically linked to me. "You like [dwd]!!!" What's wrong with you. "[Dwd] likes you!!!!" You poor asshole, stuck with her attention. One or two guys may have liked me and showed it in that toxic, abusive way boys were encouraged to in the 1990s. Or maybe they were just hateful, bullying shits. The two aren't mutually exclusive. In any event, I was clearly too ugly, too annoying, too smart for anyone to like.
And I wasn't about to change myself to get them to like me. I wouldn't have known how even if i wanted to.
So if someone said I looked good, they were clearly making fun of me. (Usually they were. Maybe sometimes they weren't. I still have a hard time telling the difference. Sometimes Husband calls me his "beauty queen of 18" and I'm like, "yes, I'm old and ugly, you don't need to tease me.")
In high school, I'd be in groups where I was the only girl among boys. If they didn't like you, they'd hit you or ignore you.
I'd be in groups where there were no guys, or only one guy. If they didn't like you, they'd swear you were their best friend and then, when your back was turned, declare you a bitch and a slut.
Never dated a guy from my own school. Anyone I did date was easily more awkward than i was. And I didn't have a serious boyfriend until shortly before graduation.
So in college I was definitely "not like other girls". The sororities didn't want me. I didn't wear uggs and booty shorts to class; neither did I join the rugby team and show up wearing sweatpants and bruises. My circle of friends was mostly guys; even after I wised up, my wedding party was, too.
I don't want a fucking homestead. I'm barely treading water keeping my house clean as it is. Bread from scratch and homemade jam? I cook three days a week; enjoy your leftovers and sandwiches.
I still don't have as many friends as I'd like, and none of us relate to each other. B is a divorced mom with a high-powered job who is a devoted mom when she has custody and wild when her kid is with dad. A is a single mom by choice with a high-powered job, generational wealth, and a ton of family support. K1 and her husband moved to another city; their jobs are there to subsidized their hobbies: hiking, gourmet cooking, crafts. K2 and her husband...might be homesteading; they bought a big piece of land for babies and dogs to run free on. D and her husband are definitely homesteading, but she's the breadwinner and he's the homemaker; if you dared him, I am *sure* he'd run around in their field of wildflowers wearing a white sundress.
All this to say:
I'm a housewife.
I'm a cis woman.
I have never in my life done femininity "right" and I am too old and too tired to start now.
the tradwife movement is the same as it has always been - back in the kitchen, back to breeding - it just has better branding.
when i was younger, i hated pink. i was not like other girls. this is now something i'm embarrassed of - this was not me being a "girl's girl."
but it was expressing something many of us felt at the time: i literally wasn't what girlhood was supposed to be. this is a hard thing to explain, but you know when you're not performing girlhood correctly. it isn't as easy as "i liked x when girls liked y" - because there were other girls that liked x, too - but i never figured out exactly the correct way to like x, or to be interested in y.
now there is the divine feminine. this is the same rhetoric it has always been: women are biologically driven to like pink and ribbons and submitting to our husbands.
the problem is that the patriarchy found a better PR team. because yes, actually, i want every woman to have the choice to be a homemaker. i also want her taken seriously for her legitimate home-making labor. i want her to be recognized as also having a job, just unpaid. i want men to have this opportunity, too.
but it is no longer "i made this choice and I love it." instead it is a sixteen-paragraph rant about how selfish it is that my generation isn't having kids. instead it's long videos about how if you feed your children processed foods, you're going to kill them. instead it is "this is what womanhood is supposed to be. i feel bad for any other choices you're making."
the shame spiral is just prettier. it is large houses devoid of personality. it is the implication: if you don't have this, you aren't happy. the solid, everlasting assurance: women are actually supposed to be submitting. this is the default. this is the natural state of things. all other attempts inflict suffering.
but you can no longer say i'm not like other girls. you can no longer reject this image completely. you cannot find it revolting, even if you know that the underbelly is toxic and festering. sure, it is the same repackaged patriarchy. but the internet does not have shades of grey. you should support and reward other women! your disgust is actually internalized misogyny. not because you are seeing a vision of yourself the way they're trying to train you to be. not because you feel her ghost pass within an inch of your earlobe. not because your father will eventually ask you - why can't you be like her?
because they figured out how to make it beautiful: women will sell other women on this idea, and we will find the singular loophole in feminism. sure, she's shaming you in most of her videos. sure, she implies that a different life is obscene. but she just wants you to be happy! you'd be happier if you were listening!
and the whole time you're sitting there thinking: i'd actually just be happier if i had that kind of money.
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seat-safety-switch · 1 day ago
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Kids are funny. In just one summer vacation, a child can make lifelong friends with a weird frog, be transported to a distant fantasy realm under attack by an evil magician, experience loss via the tragic sacrifice of a trusted warrior ally, and be returned to this earth, just in time to start school again in the fall. For the rest of us, we push the "snooze" button on our Slack notifications nineteen times in the same summer.
What adults are, though, is resourceful. We've figured out a long time ago that we should be taking advantage of anyone who isn't paying enough attention. The grift can never end, and if I'm scamming you, you can't be scamming me, unless you are, in which case I need to scam someone else too. So when our children started opening magical portals to fantasy realms all over the fucking place, you can't imagine we didn't see an opportunity.
First, it's the free babysitting. Sure, the deposed queen of that magical land is going to send them into some kind of kill-or-be-killed foreign war, but there's a fifty-fifty chance our government does it too. They'll learn some valuable skills, make those aforementioned friends, carry the trauma forever. And while they're gone, we can use the closets and wardrobes that they left open (and the lights left on! These kids think electricity is free!) to get rid of some stuff we don't want anymore.
Folks, if dumping nuclear waste in Narnia is wrong, then you can pay higher taxes to get rid of it. I'm charging the government a flat ten-k per barrel to chuck it through the portal, where some halflings can deal with it in their verdant, unspoiled fairyland. And if anything decides to come out, we can just kill it the way adults do: by ignoring it for several decades until it gets really bad, and then blaming each other for it. Yep, the way I see it, the political party I hate are the ones who keep releasing all those manticores. We should dump more nuclear waste in there to teach 'em a lesson.
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maladaptivewriting · 2 days ago
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since the tiktok ban, i've been seeing a lot of stuff where people blame americans for jegulus and i can't stop thinking about it. i don't know why people feel this way, but i am prepared to make an argument. so please allow me to make my case.
[also this is completely based on generalizations. i know americans that hate jegulus and love jily, and i know british people who hate jily and love jegulus]
so i've never been a jily girl. even years before i found jegulus, i never cared about that ship. i straight up didn't even know that people wrote fics about them specifically. (i actually still don't know if people do write fics about only them because i would never seek out something like that).
originally, i'd thought it was just because i only cared about the golden trio characters and occasionally sirius and remus, but the more i got into the marauders era, the more i realized that james and lily together were the standouts, i just really didn't care for them.
it got to the point where i only read fics that referenced jily if they were extremely background to the story (which they almost always were bc there is just not that much to say about them) or preferably if both of them were already dead and it was just remus, sirius, and harry who remained.
shortly after i really started getting into the fandom and writing for jegulus, i spoke to someone who hated jegulus and loved jily, and i told them that i'd always felt like james and lily were on the road to divorce before they died. this person was SCANDALIZED. they could not understand why'd said that.
now granted, this person was in their early twenties and in my experience, if you haven't lived long enough to see a lot of your friends go through divorces, then the idea that james and lily might divorce may seem crazy.
however, and this is where the american thing really comes in, i realized after this conversation why i felt that there was no way that james and lily were going to make it and that was specifically because of growing up a conservative christian bible belt ass place.
do you know how many couples i knew in high school who started dating their senior year even though they seemingly had nothing in common, had sex one time and didn't use protection because sex education is extremely limited down there, got pregnant, and had to have shotgun wedding?
so. fucking. many.
do you know how many of them are still married?
only one.
so when i see jily, two characters who have nothing in common beyond being gryffindors, get together, have a kid, and get married (not necessarily in that order) all within like two years, i know that the odds are not in their favor. those two aren't staying together. don't play with me.
now i don't know how people feel about young marriages in other parts of the world, especially in the uk, but i've spoken to a lot of americans, especially ones from the south, and so many of them have had the exact same experiences with their peers. i just can't help but wonder if that lends itself to less people being interested in jily.
i have other arguments to this, like that jily is not as entertaining as almost every other ship that james or lily could be involved in and americans being partial to entertainment above all else, or the american (and christian) obsession with the concept of redemption and self sacrifice making regulus a more compelling character than one that lived and died good (lily and james), but this was the one i wanted to focus on today.
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anxiousthoughts365 · 3 days ago
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Friendship
TW: Disabled Remus, language, Snape bashing
'Fuck off, Snape.'
'It's a simple enough question, Potter,' Snape drawled, jogging to keep pace with James, who was stomping down corridor after corridor in an effort to get rid of the boy. 'Why would Regulus come to you, of all people, when he was so clearly distraught when his own brother did just that two years ago? Rather suspicious, don't you agree?'
James clenched his teeth against the retort that tried to claw it's way out of his throat. Snape had been following him since he'd somehow let slip about Regulus coming to live with them over the past summer, determined to find out why Regulus had chosen James as his refuge. But his and Regulus' relationship wasn't common knowledge, and there was nothing he could say that wouldn't give Snape some sort of fodder, so he was doing his best to just stay quiet.
James still couldn't quite remember how Snape had gotten him talking about the younger Black brother while they'd been forced into a partnership in Potions class, but of course Snape had latched onto the tiny tidbit of information and was running with it.
He'd calmly told the Slytherin, more than once, that it wasn't his story to tell. But the slimy boy just would not let the matter drop, and he was really starting to piss James off. The only thing keeping him from punching Snape in the mouth was that Remus, Sirius and Peter were right behind him, and the knowledge helped him to keep his cool. Almost.
'Unless, of course,' Snape sneered, relentless as ever when it came to riling James Potter. 'There's reason why he might run into the arms of someone that his family hates? Unless there's some deeper connection here, something that the young Black might not want everyone to see?'
'I said fuck off, Snivellus!' James snapped, his heart racing with sudden fear at the insinuation. One more taunt, and Merlin help him, he wouldn't be able to hold himself back.
'Oh, that's it, isn't it?' Snape gasped, pressing one hand over his heart in mock surprise while his thin lips turned up in a sly smirk. 'Regulus Black, the second sibling in this school to desert the Noble House of Black, goes running at the first sign of danger, and runs right into the arms of his big strong saviour and -'
Snape's words were suddenly cut off by a sharp screech, and James' head snapped up to see the boy falling face-first down the set of stairs to their left. He gaped, looking around him to try and figure out what had happened, and turned just in time to watch Sirius wrap an arm around Remus' waist as the tall boy wobbled. It wasn't until the end of his friend's cane connected with the floor again that James understood what had happened.
'Vile little cockroach,' Remus growled, his amber eyes narrowed and his scarred nose scrunched up in distaste as he watched Snape bounce down step after step, whining all the way. James felt something tighten in his chest, gratitude and admiration welling inside him.
'Moony,' he breathed. 'Did you just -'
'He did,' Sirius interrupted, sounding just as awed as James felt. Remus looked up again at his boyfriend's voice, and seemed surprised to find the others staring at him with such evident worship. Then Sirius was stepping in close, wrapping his other arm around Remus and gazing at him as he added, 'That was bloody brilliant, Moons. Merlin, I love you. So fucking much. I -'
'Yes, yes, we all love Remus,' Peter hissed, grabbing Sirius' collar and dragging him backwards, in the direction of the Gryffindor Tower. 'You can give our comrade his well-deserved reward later - preferably when I'm asleep and oblivious - but right now, we need to be very much not here.'
Sirius seemed about to protest, but at that moment Snape landed in a noisy heap at the bottom of the stairs, and the four boys made quick use of their extensive knowledge of Hogwarts' secret passageways to disappear.
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lanzapasta2 · 1 day ago
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Ppl hating on the most recent school shooter for “copying” are so fucking hypocritical.
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I have also seen ppl say things like "you're not a real shooter if you didn't kill more than 3 people" or ranting that "new shooters just need to stop because they'll never be legends." It's so obvious ppl are moving the goal post because they don't want to recognise/claim a black shooter (since they will worship cho and salvador).
Ppl were excited about a new shooting (which I find gross), but as soon as his photo was leaked, the tides changed.
EXACTLY like what!!? Omg you keep saying facts. It’s so strange that they’ll accept Asian and Hispanic shooters but never African Americans and indigenous ones.
They act like liking an African American and indigenous shooter is craziest shit ever.
School shootings are mostly seen a “white person” thing so ik they were giggling and kicking their feet waiting for the face reveal and then their heart broke cuz it wasn’t the stereotypical white shooter guy/girl. (Which they can chill cuz I guarantee you next month it will be another shooter but hopefully they aren’t white so they can throw their tantrums)
But the whole argument of “new shooters need to stop since they will never be legends” is so wild to me when it’s clearly not true. Natalie had her week of fame and older shooters like Jeff W barely gets talked about (I wonder why….) and he committed the act yearsss ago.
The other reason is bc they simply care about the same 5 mfs and don’t want to give attention to anybody else especially if they’re poc unless ofc it’s Salvador (even tho he has a bad rep around here for a good reason) but Cho is pretty much liked but not liked enough (mmm I wonder why….) I hate playing the “well if he was white” card but no literally if he was he would be talked about sm
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first-ex-wife · 2 years ago
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iknowwhereyousleepatnight · 1 month ago
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graduation was technically yesterday but i didn't go bc im hashtag cool and hashtag apathetic about the whole thing but that means i am no longer a student anymore which means i can't even lie to people and say i have exams to study for when i'm avoiding them nooooo
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mashmouths · 5 months ago
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so i started this show and it just gets worse and worseeeee not only did it lift the romance subplot directly from twilight (and not well) but they also are trying to play the forbidden love angle hard in the fantasy racism vein except it's a "cross-species" relationship between the two whitest people i've ever seen in my life and there are three people of color in the whole (first season of the) show who aren't villains and it seems that every other episode (and sometimes ebery episode and sometimes twice an episode!) there is a man physically or magically subjugating a woman and i keep waiting for the big reveal at the end to be stolen from fucking rainbow rowell
#yes i read 'carry on' by rainbow rowell in middle school what else could you have possibly expected from me. anyway she gives me simon snow#vibes and not in a good way and she's even blonde while her british vampire boyfriend has dark dark hair and just. you will never be basil.#also i hate to be that guy but the writing has made me physically recoil and the acting almost reads as silly but mostly as middling :/ and#i wanted and expected more from matthew goode bc i really liked him in downton but i guess this is a 2018 bbc modern vampire fantasty serie#like i guess.#also there's SO much shit about bloodlines and maybe i'm gay with a blood disorder amd a family history of adoption but like. who fucking#careeessssssssss it ahould not be that serious. why is it that serious.#also the fantasy racism kind of reads like it's mesnt to be? homophobic adjacent? like there's a Lot of 'love who you love' talk going on#for the single most bland heterosexual relationship i've ever seen on a screen like there is so little chemistry? so little#anyway it's called 'a discovery of witches' and i'd recommend not watching it 🫶 or if you do then watch it on 1.5x speed#it's been decent background noise for knitting bc i kinda sorta care about the plot but if miss a chunk bc i'm in the lace chart zone i do#not care and i do not have to go back to catch it bc the writing is so transparent#there was another series it stole from that's escaping me atm but when i noticed it pissed me off a touch. hmm maybe it will come back to m#a post#do not watch this show#I REMEMBERED they wanted the juliette holding diana captive moment to be joaquin's 'i want to watch you fuck her' from sense8 SOOOOO BAD bu#it WASN'T bc they were too afraid to lean into anything that would make juliette interesting at all. for being all about the world's most#special blonde woman this show does not seem to like women very much. sad! well there's other shows#OH ALSO ALSO there are 3 magical 'creature' species which are witch + vampire + femon except the demons don't seem? to have any magical#abilities that humans don't have besides sensing the species of other creatures? like witches can cast spells and vampires do their various#vampire things but demons have nothing going for them except disproportionately high rates of homelessness and suicide?? like girl what are#we doingggggggg what are we doing here !! what's their deal why does no one care !! can they do anything or no !! god this show sucks
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a-gay-bloodmage · 19 days ago
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Care to Join Us For Some Tea?
(Emmrich Volkarin & Sascha Ingellvar)
Rook is a very strange creature, always keeping to the shadows of the Lighthouse like a timid ghost. It isn't until Emmrich recalls a strange encounter, three decades past and in the depths of the Grand Necropolis, that he begins to understand what made Sascha Ingellvar into the man he is today.
Read Here!
#dragon age#dragon age the veilguard#original content#emmrich volkarin#da rook#sascha ingellvar#ao3#this was a fun (painful) one to write#I've mentioned it before but I work in a school and that involves working with all kinds of kids AND adults#And the process of “child has tendency to run- one adult talks to other adult- one tries to deal with the child- one documents behavior”#is one that I know pretty well at this point#by the time of datv Sascha is 36 years old and has Developed past where he was at 6 but he's still... the child they found in the tombs#He's always going to be strange and echoy and socially awkward and unsure who it's Safe to be around#he just really really really needs a place to Belong and I feel like he'll be able to find that in the Lighthouse amongst the Veilguard#sorry if I bring up anyone's worst memories of being in Special Ed and not treated well by the overworked staff in there#And I'm really happy with how I ended up writing Emmrich and his POV#According to QoAM I did really well#I feel like people know Emmrich very well as he is in-game so I wanted to explore him in his younger days before he's as Established#not just as a Mourn Watch but as someone who is more willing to stand up for what's right and- especially- someone who loves children#I think of all the people I knew in their teens who Hated kids who have softened more and more as they got older and more mature#I certainly don't think Emmrich ever hated children (he's always been Soft) but I feel like it's more of a “how patient am I?”#Like I look at Manfred and how he also Echoes and Mimics and I'm like. Yeah. That's like my little special ed kids.#Emmrich you would be PERFECT in the life skills room I wanna go run Coffee Cart with you that would be great#anyway happy birthday Sascha!! So sorry that your childhood was so fucking awful and you spent your sixth birthday like This#Tumblr not linking to ao3 makes me want to kill this site#Birthday Fic
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blujayonthewing · 29 days ago
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I wish I had any way of knowing whether people have gotten Weirder™ about my name in recent years or if this has been happening behind the scenes the entire time
I've been going by Jay since I was 11. At the time nobody objected to or questioned this, at least not to me; I found out many years later that Jay is supposedly a "boy's name," but nobody ever said 'you can't use that as a nickname, it's a boy's name' and it went completely uncontested by anyone when I switched. Lots of kids announced some manner of name change at the start of a new school year in middle school; it was all normal and fine. My mom and, you know, grandmas and other relatives kept calling me Jessica, which was also fine! I didn't make a big family announcement or correct any relatives on this, I just wanted to differentiate myself from the half dozen other Jessicas in school.
For twenty years!! This has gone on being perfectly normal! My Real Name™ is an increasingly obscure bit of trivia I get to spring on friends who didn't realize I had one, which is always funny (my brother in law didn't believe me and demanded to see my driver's license). My mom and grandmas have largely still called me Jess, and that's also fine! It's nice, even! There's a particular intimacy there of having a name only my mother uses-- but, crucially, I have never asked her not to, or said that I don't like it. And as FAR AS I KNOW, this has all been true and fine for TWENTY YEARS.
My own feelings about it have never changed, and feel, to me, very straightforward: if I tell you that my name is Jay, and you decide that no it isn't, that is a problem. That's the rule. That's literally it. I had a high school teacher who asked on the syllabus for us to write down if we went by something other than our full name, who was nonetheless UNIQUE among all of my teachers from 6th grade onward in always and only ever calling me Jess, even though I signed all my work Jay, all the other teachers called me Jay, he literally asked whether anyone wanted to be called something else and I answered Jay, and I had him for two semesters. I met a work friend of Justin's once who asked upon introduction whether Jay was short for something, and when I told him it was short for Jessica he took it upon himself to call me Jess instead. This isn't me having a problem with any particular iteration of my name, this is just asshole behavior! I told you what my name was and you said 'no it isn't'. The problem here does not seem complex to me?
But within the last [hand wiggle] handful of years I feel like it keeps getting weirder? Apparently my dad and grandma argued about it at my wedding rehearsal-- she, dramatically, insisting 'I don't care, her name is Jessica, I'm going to call her that ;n;' and my dad angrily defensive that no it isn't, I go by Jay, that should be respected. And I'm sitting here listening to my dad relay this in utter bewilderment like. Well dad I love the energy but I have never been bothered at all if grandma calls me Jessica. I have never even once asked her not to or complained to anyone that she does. But also this is the grandma who HAS called me Jay more often than not?? My mom's mom never picked it up, but I was astonished to hear my dad's mom was acting like this was some New Dramatic Change that she Hated and not a thing she's literally already been doing for, again, twenty entire years. Why are you suddenly making it weird! Last weekend Justin's stepmom mentioned seeing my mom at the hospital where mom works, and how she said something like 'yes I'm Jessica's mom-- wait, no, Jay, she hates it when I do that' and I just?? I literally don't, the only problem now is that people who know me won't know who the fuck you're talking about
all of this and I'm just. I am literally just sitting here. why are we inventing problems out of this two decades later. what is going on
#I went by jess on purpose once in a college art class because there was a guy actually named jay#and I was like 'fuck this is why I dropped jessica in the first place' lmao#one time I put 'jay' on the preferred name line on medical intake paperwork and then when the doc was like 'jay?' I was like OH I hate that#oh no doctors Must Only use my paperwork name it turns out lmao#Justin's work friend calling me jess was so ??? you're not my MOM????#harvest moon awl has a 'what should I call you now that we're married' mechanic for I assume Darling or whatever#but one time I had my video game husband call me jess#justin also in real life has Jess Privilages but he doesn't want them because HE has only ever known me as jay#IT'S CONTEXTUAL. IT'S NOT THE NAME IT'S THE CONTEXT. IT'S THE RESPECT OR LACK THEREOF BEHIND WHAT NAME YOU USE#both my parents suddenly overcorrecting is weird but ultimately fine because the intention is clearly good#my grandma suddenly acting like it's a problem sets my teeth on edge. hey. this was never a problem before. what do YOU think this is about.#uhhh not to get. into it but. my dad is also almost definitely projecting baggage onto the situation that's got nothing to do with me#dad at christmas: it's just disrespectful! if someone tells you their name or their pronouns you don't get to decide they're wrong!!#me: I completely agree. not actually relevant to whether mom specifically calls me jess because that is in fact allowed but. I mean.#me: if you hypothetically told YOUR mom you go by something else now she SHOULD just use that instead. you're not wrong. hypothetically.#AAAANYWAY not to tangent on THAT too much#for ME having a nickname was so normal and it's only very abruptly been made weird by others and I'm baffled and annoyed about it#my mom's stepsister I see every handful of years: hi jess-- oh wait your mom said you go by jay now?#me: I've gone by jay since 2001 what is going ON--#I don't think it even occurred to me to wonder about Gender when it was mr hughes 'jess'ing me in high school but in retrospect I wonder#THE THING IS JAY ISN'T A MAN'S NAME TO ME. I MADE IT UP I DIDN'T KNOW IT HAD A GENDER. IT'S A GIRL'S NAME TO ME BECAUSE IT'S MY NAME!!#DON'T BE FUCKING WEIRD!!!#hhhuuaagh#I've talked about all this before but it came up again TWICE at christmas in ways that made me go STOP BEING WEIRD lmao#so it's on my mind again#about me
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supahstarrr · 11 hours ago
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OHH this playlist is so good i gotta put some of these in my playlist!!!!!! It's taken me a while to complete this since this was ridiculously hard for me to do. I only feel confident in three of my choices but I won't be surprised if I got all of these wrong. It's been really fun and confusing trying to assign the songs haha.
So our first song is "Egoist". It's hard for me to find the "definite" meaning of the song, but it appears it revolves around the singer talking to a teacher (or a therapist) and wanting to withdraw from "school" (life). The singer revolves around hating themselves and their lives, resulting in them to becoming suicidal. I think I'll assign this song to Kamimura.
"S.T.A.R Child" is interesting to me since it's mainly about the singer talking about adoring another person. So basically you could assign the song to a character based on if they're the singer or the subject which our singer speaks about. I'm assigning this song to either Isono or Tsuno, as both of their characters revolve around adoring another person. I'm leaning towards Isono Miki.
"Bitter Medicine" was one of the songs made me think of more characters than the other ones. Since It revolves around the singer having a facade focused on tending to others, resulting in people looking up to them in a way that doesn't acknowledge their genuine character. The singer is self-destructive, with some of those destructive habits stemming from how the facade isolates themselves from others. This is why I lean towards the song being best fit for Sasaki or Hayashi, but the note of the singer challenging with what it means to be truly responsible makes me lean towards Sasaki.
"Shelter" is a song that's very caring. One of the main themes is family, with the topic of shelter adding onto it. Very specifically the singer says they will "give them shelter like youve done to me..." and says that the person who gave them shelter is "watching over them". Both Tsuno and Harada are both very caring individuals who give shelter to others (Tsuno gives shelters to people, Harada give shelter to animals). Though, It's the additional context Tsuno grappling with the lost of Isono who gave her comfort, and being split up from a family that was very good to her, that makes me lean towards this song being fit for Tsuno.
"Anything Can Happen" belongs to Hasegawa hmmmmmm methink. I'm sticking to this. Definitely. This is Hasegawa talking to Kamimura. This reminds me so much of Hasegawa talking in his interview. Hasegawa LITERALLY said "anything can happen" in his interview. He is speaking. Yes. Yes. Yes. I feel slightly confident about this choice.
"Envy" belongs to... I also have no fucking idea!!!!!!! TAMBA!!!!!!!???????? Okay yeah I'm going to stick with Tamba. Like I mean this fits her secret. Her history of having envy as a result of her constantly being pushed to be "big" makes me think this is her song.
"Our Time" belongs to Ojima!!!!! I interpret the song as the tendency to go into a "dream" world being struggled by the necessity to step into the real world. It not only speaks about dissociative habits stemming from stress but also the potential to not be dedicated by that coping mechanism when met with troubles. The more as the series go on, we definitely have been proved of this potential. So, this definitely fits Ojima!
Okay so first off all "Dance of the Corpses" is definitely going into my playlist. Second off this is fucking hard I don't know!!!!!!!!!!!!! Okay I'm going to stop my dramatics, but I am serious when I say that assigning a character to this song has been one of the hardest to decide. Then I fucking realized there's sixteen students, not seventeen, so this doesn't have to apply to one of the students. Which makes things complicated because uh, this can apply to the researchers or the mascot.
I lean towards assigning this song to Monomoko. Which is weird as fuck to say, but then again the songs vaguely speaks about the underworld and the singer "dragging" down other people to become corpses. I can't figure out the definite meaning, and I may need to listen to what album this song is in for added context about this song. But yeah it's not even (some of) the lyrics that makes me think of it, but also the cute sound warped with odd, intimidating and experimental, layered sounds that makes me think of my favorite bunny. It's like the sound has a certain "unhinged" factor to it, or some kind of "tinge" to it that makes me think of it.
"TrusT" makes me think of both Hama or Hayashi. I am more inclined to think this belongs to Hayashi though. The pre-chorus really makes me think of her, particularly: "I feel the tension in the fear and truth / I carry life in between the divide / But all the wrestling has left me bruised". Although Hayashi has always been shown to both reinforce the despair and hope of the cast due to her pessimism and protective nature, her feeling both the despair and hope of the cast lead her to impulsive decisions that weighed her down further. The distrust this chorus revolves around really strength's how I view this as best fit for Hayashi, as that is definitely a part of her character as well.
Problematic belongs to... Hiroaki. Do I even need to say why. Like 90% of the lyrics just SCREAMS him.
Yet again, I'm thought of both Hama or Hayashi being fit for a song. Though for the song "Creature", I feel more inclined to think Hama is more fit for this song. The blatant reference of Jesus christ that makes me think of his catholicism. The message being about division regarding to humanity reminds me of how Hama's self is "divided" between man and demon.
"Eldest Daughter" belongs to Watari Nishino. come on it HAS to. if i got my baby's song wrong then i deserve a good shooting to the head. i will be deeply ashamed if i have gotten this wrong (hyperbole). This songs speaks about a girl's life as the eldest daughter influencing her to seek out "broken people" to "fix", which mirrors Watari's constant tendency to reach towards others. The references to fire totally makes me think of Watari too!!!!!
"The Queen of White Lies" seems like another case of either the character assigned to the song being the singer or the subject which the singer speaks about. Guessing based off the singer, this songs belongs to Yanagi Shigeki. The singer speaks about (consciously or subconsciously) knowing the "queen" is lying but allows it because of their own lack of self worth. That soooo reminds me of Yanagi's relationship with women (especially Sasaki).
Oooo another half-alive song? OP must really like that band! "What's Wrong" is a song reminding me of Chiba. Within the song is "avoiding" the dark complexities of the truth for the sake of fixing "what's wrong" despite that wrong fundamentally stemming from the dark complexities. Chiba represented all the best and toxic habits attached with hope—the determination to help everyone but also the tendency to ignore darkness for the sake of being a savior for everyone's comfort.
Okay come on. "Villain" has to belong to Okazaki Hanano! That's their song!!!!!!!! The sound the lyrics... yeah that has to be their song.
"ビータ" / 缶缶 belongs to Wada! The lyrics and even the sound reminds me of the intensity in him, which has been always within him from the start and is influenced by the current game.
Last song!!! "Kitchen Fork" belongs Harada. I think the song speaking about the dangerous quality to the singer's mind fits Harada when considering his instinct to cover up the victim's death. The singer is "haunted" by themselves and appears to feel guilt, which matches with Harada's life in and outside of the game.
Finally I'm done! This was very interesting to do! Perhaps confusing for me but also kinda fun. I'm unsure about the format I used but I hope this post is like. Readable.
Tetro Danganronpa Pink - Playlist Challenge
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Credit to @accirax & @venus-is-thinking for the idea !
Below is a link to a YouTube playlist of 17 songs. Each song is assigned to a member of the TDP cast. Try and guess who's song is which !
Reblog your answers in the replies. : ) The deadline is January 31st.
Spoilers will likely be in the reblogs or comments !
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apocalypticdemon · 6 months ago
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I am so beyond ready to quit this job. Wednesday cannot come fast enough.
#to be fair it's bc school starts again in a few weeks#but idk. every day at this office feels like sandpaper on my skin. people always ask me shit i dont understand#and every case is so individual there's no set checklist to follow to troubleshoot#so most of the time I just grind my gears and get stuck#it'd busy more days than not.#and it was advertised to me as data entry only. client interactions was not what i signed up for.#it's all client interaction.#we're short staffed so nobody gets to take the back office and have a break.#when we weren't short staffed i was the new guy and only got 1 day in the back a week while everyone else got 2.#all my coworkers are conservative but talk like they're apolitical.#i thought it'd be fulfilling bc im helping people get benefits#but many are rude or impatient as any other service job. I'm constantly trying to direct people that don't want to listen#or explain the intricacies of something i barely understand.#and i don't want to lead people astray bc you have to start over if you blow a deadline.#but there's just nothing redeeming that i enjoy.#i hate customer service. i hate constantly asking questions. i like seldom few of my coworkers.#i can't be me at work.#and i don't care about the work itself anymore.#this job made me cry every day for weeks last month from sheer stress and overstimulation.#i almost cried myself sick several times.#the only reason I'm not there anymore is bc i dont fucking care anymore.#it took me 2 months to burn out. 2 months!#i was training for half of that!!#idk. everyone decided i was smart and could pick it up quickly so. even though everyone else got 4-6 weeks of shadowing#you can make do with 3 before you start doing stuff solo.#which feels unfair. i wasn't ready for it. and i resent the decision quite a bit.#plus it's been a nightmare for me in terms of external stressors and my generally deteriorating mental health. so.#all in all. i hate it here.#and i can't wait to turn in my notice so i can gtfo in 2 weeks#i am so tired. free me. let me go back to my music please
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supercantaloupe · 6 months ago
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what’s a fun fact about you that people may not guess
i am not anyone's idea of athletic. however since my social circle is like 90% other honors student orchestra losers, i technically qualify as a jock given that i have six years of experience playing field hockey
#i was a goalie though. jysk. lest you think i was actually running around like a fit person or something#sasha answers#infinitelytheheartexpands#i wasn't bad at it actually. though my 12th grade season was squandered by my fucking coach who never let me in varsity games#my team was shit and my teammates hated me. i don't think i ever had an unqualified Great experience playing with them.#by some miracle though i came out of it all actually enjoying field hockey as a sport#both as a player and a spectator#and to this day it's the only sport i've willingly gone to see professional matches of#and will actively sit down and watch the olympic matches of#though they don't often get broadcast here because field hockey in the us is not taken seriously and our teams rarely make the olympics lol#so if i want to watch i'd have to stream it online at odd times. like a netherlands or australian match or something#though the upside of the sport being kind of small in this country outside of specific regions (like where i grew up)#means that going to see literally the us national team play on their home turf is great. the crowd is modest it's not cramped or too loud#lots of fun. too bad they moved their home base though and are no longer in driving distance for us to attend games. oh well#my sister was always way more into field hockey than me. she played in college as a recruited athlete...i just played in high school#mostly cause i had to. but i still somehow enjoy the sport anyway#which i can't really say of any other major team sport#not the ones i've tried to play anyway
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alittlearsonist · 9 days ago
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kerosene-saint · 6 months ago
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I fucking hate how much the mental health system is failing so many people and how much it has failed me. I hate that so many people are just stuck suffering and just have to some how deal with it.
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britneyshakespeare · 11 months ago
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Subbing special ed at the middle school slaps. Every class I've had so far is 2-4 students and when we finish the assignment we play Uno
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