#husband!joel

[honeyedmiller]

Clouded | Joel Miller

husband!joel miller x wife!reader

rating: 18+, minors dni

warnings: use of marijuana, reader and joel both get high, smut (unprotected piv, two ass slaps, somewhat dirty talk??, brief nipple play, cock warming, joel is touchy), the adlers hate the millers in this one probably, she/her pussy pronouns, a tiny bit of fluff, joel is corny af and makes corny ass jokes (ofc cus what else would he do). let’s pretend that’s joel and not javi in the pic above just for the sake of this horny mess of a fic, cool? cool. no use of y/n.

word count: 1.2k

a/n: idk. this was just pure brainrot what can i say

synopsis: saturdays are meant for errands and chores. joel convinces you otherwise just for once.

Saturday mornings were meant for running errands and cleaning the house. At least, that’s what you and your husband agreed to. 

But today was different. Today, it started off with Joel mumbling ‘five more minutes’ into your shoulder, hands roaming around your body to feel your bare flesh beneath his calloused palms. 

He eventually made his way down to your clit, rubbing slow, lazy circles into you while you ground your ass into his stiff cock. 

It was nice. The change of pace was something you were relishing, even if it was short-lived. 

You grabbed his hand from underneath the sheets, bringing his middle finger to your mouth to suck on the tip. He groaned when you bit the pad of his finger, and you couldn’t help but giggle at his reaction. 

“So needy, Mr. Miller.” You teased, twisting your head so your gaze could lock on his. 

His usual honey brown eyes had darkened, pooling with pure lust and desire as his hands gently wrapped around your throat. His thumb and forefinger lifted your jaw up so your lips could easily slot between his, biting your bottom lip as he pulled apart from you. 

“What I need is my pretty wife on top ‘a me. Show me how a real cowgirl rides it.” He winks, and you can’t help but laugh at his corny joke. 

But still, you oblige. Who were you to say no to being deliciously filled up by your husband’s cock? 

You twist out of his grasp and swing a leg over him, straddling his hips. He instinctively grabs onto your waist and slowly guides you down over his erection.

You needed him badly, but you just had to tease him first. Your already-slick cunt settled on top of his cock, and you started to rock your hips slowly to coat his length in your slick. 

You both moaned at the contact, Joel closing his eyes as he clenched that familiar muscle in his jaw. His eyes snapped open as he felt you shift your weight above him, watching you lean over to pull something out of your nightstand drawer. 

You pulled out the half finished pre-roll you and him had smoked a few nights prior along with the neon green bic lighter stashed to the side. You shoot him a wicked grin before slotting the joint between your lips and flicking the lighter a couple of times before the end of the joint starts to crackle. 

You deeply inhale as you stare down at Joel, tossing the lighter onto your nightstand before you grab his length with your hand. You tease yourself with the tip of his cock, a shiver running down your spine as you finally allow yourself to sink down onto him. 

Joel plucks the joint from your lips and slots it between his own, groaning at the sensation of your warmth completely enveloping him. 

You use both of your hands to grab his thighs behind you to hold yourself upright, smoke escaping your lungs as you let out a strangled moan. 

It didn’t matter how many times you two had fucked—the stretch was always something that made you gush every single time. 

You gave an experimental roll of your hips, lolling your head back in pure pleasure. Joel’s hand skated up your body and squeezed your breast, toying with your nipple between his forefinger and thumb. 

You rolled your head back around so you were looking down at him, and he gently grabbed the back of your neck to coax you down. He used his thumb to open your jaw as he blew smoke into your mouth, gripping your other hip so tight that you felt the imprint of his wedding band into your flesh. 

“So fuckin’ pretty, baby. My beautiful wife. Can’t believe you’re all mine.” Joel’s voice is soft and sincere, and you lean down to kiss him before taking the joint from him to slot it between your lips once more. 

“You’re pretty too, cowboy.” You wink at him and a laugh rumbles from his sturdy chest, slightly shaking you in the process. He gives your ass a light slap, but you moan and roll your hips to the contact. 

Joel shoots you a shit-eating smirk before he slaps your ass again, harder this time, and the sting is fucking delicious. 

You lowly moan his name as you begin to ride him faster, and his hands easily find home on your hips as you find a steady rhythm. 

Nothing but your pants and slick skin slapping on skin reverberates off of your bedroom walls, and you partially think to yourself you should’ve fucking filmed this for later use. 

Joel takes the joint from your hands and stubs it out as quickly as he can before his hand rejoins your hip, groaning at how fucking good you feel. 

“Jus’ like that baby. So fuckin’ good.” 

You whine at his praise, head cloudy with lust and desire as you ride him even faster. Your hips burn and you’re panting hard, feeling that devilish little burn in the depths of your core. 

“C’mon baby, I know you’re close. Can feel ya. She’s fuckin’ squeezin’ me so goddamn good.” He continues, and at this point he takes matters into his own hands and starts to fuck up into you. 

You cry out in pleasure as you rest your hands on his chest, nails digging little crescent marks into his hot skin. 

Your mind was so foggy and all you wanted was for that coil to fucking snap. It was wound up so tight, and Joel’s cock was nudging that perfect spot inside of you. The wiry hairs at the base of his cock added that extra bit of friction, creating the perfect cocktail for a most blissful orgasm. 

“Atta girl, there you go baby. I know you wanna fuckin’ come for me.” 

And you did. Your body went rigid as your eyes rolled to the back of your skull, legs shaking as you gushed around your husband’s cock. 

“Fuckfuckfuck—Joel!” You couldn’t help but scream, not giving a fuck if the neighbors could possibly hear. 

Hell, you wanted the whole world to know just how good your husband fucked you. 

Your body tingled as he grunted, immediately stilling as he fucked his spend up into you. 

You collapsed on top of him, breathing heavy and eyes half-lidded and glossed over in your fucked-out state. You moved to get off of him, but Joel stilled you and wrapped his arms around you, kissing your forehead as he kept you in place. 

“Mm mm. Don’ move. This is nice.” He mumbled, kissing your forehead a few more times before you nuzzled your face into his neck, licking his salty skin before giving him a small nibble. You kiss him after, sighing into him as your body felt like it was floating on cloud nine. 

“Fuck, what about our errands today?” 

“They can be done tomorrow.” He says, eyes closed as he traced patterns onto your back with his fingertips. 

“On a Sunday?” You ask, looking up at him. With his eyes still closed, he offered you a lazy grin before giving you a small nod. 

“So fuckin’ worth it.” 

tags: @nostalxgic @endlessthxxghts @punkshort @ilovepedro @amanitacowboy (this one’s for us lindsey <3)

divider by @saradika-graphics

[tightjeansjavi]

The Rite of Movement | drabble

“oh sweet, sweet, dark haired man”

A/N: what’s crazy is that this idea came to me because I was watching Iron Man 2 and when Tony Stark is drunk at his birthday party?? I also do not understand the correlation whatsoever, but here we are 🤣 and Mai Tais are no joke lol

~word count: 1k~

Summary: it’s the first night of yours and Joel’s honeymoon, and he’s had a few too many Mai Tais tonight, baby love.

Pairing | pornstar!husband Joel x pornstar!female reader

Warnings: alcohol consumption, implied smut, established relationship, dirty talk, teasing, flirting, language, breeding kink??, Joel forgets you’re his wife in an endearing way, he also wants to pump you full of his babies, Joel is in his 40’s reader is in her 30’s, reader has no physical descriptions, readers nickname is baby love, +18 minors dni!

series masterlist

“Baby loooove.” He hummed into your ear, arms looped around your waist for support in his drunken stupor.

Joel had a few too many Mai Tais the first night of your honeymoon. Combined with hours laying in the sun, endless amounts of delicious food and love making with you, he was in a syrupy sweet, love sick haze.

“Let’s get you back to the room, okay baby?” You had your arm wrapped around his middle, guiding him towards the direction of your private honeymoon suite.

“Can’t feel my legs.” He giggled, burying his face into your neck, steps staggered as you guided him along, “and you smell fuckin’ delicious! Jesus fuckin’ Christ, what perfume are ya wearin’, baby love?”

“That would be the rum talking, baby.” You giggled with him, giving his waist a gentle squeeze. “It’s your favorite perfume, Joel.”

He chuckled, peppering kisses against your exposed neck, leaning further into your supportive hold around him, “Well, ain’t I the luckiest man alive. Where ya takin’ me, pretty girl?”

“To the room, baby. And then we’re gonna get you some water, okay?”

“And you’re coming with me?” He questioned softly.

“Course I am. Gonna get you nice and comfy and we’ll have a good snuggle.” You promised him.

“Oooh! A snuggle with my baby love? Well, now I’m really lucky!” He chuckled. “Man, this place is so beautiful, isn’t it?” He detached his lips from your neck and tilted his chin upwards so he could look up at the millions of stars and the gently swaying palm trees.

“It’s very beautiful, baby.” You agreed.

“Not as beautiful as you, of course. You’re like—the most beautiful person ever, so beautiful that sometimes my brain turns to absolute mush when you’re around me! Isn’t that crazy?” He said with a lopsided grin, eyes barely peeked open as he looked over at you and leaned in to nuzzle his nose against your cheek.

“You wanna hear something just as crazy, baby?” You met his hazy gaze with a soft smile tugging on your lips as you reached your freehand up to brush away a few stray curls from his forehead that were obstructing his view.

“What could be crazier than that, baby love?”

“Sometimes my brain turns to mush when you’re around me too, Joel.”

He gasped in surprise, not believing the words leaving your mouth, “whaaat? No way! That is crazy!” He hiccuped, “‘scuse me baby love, m’ a bit drunk right now. Too many Mai Tais.” He rasped.

“It’s okay, baby. That’s why I’m here. Getting you back to the room safely.” You reassured him.

He nodded, crouching down a little so he could bury his face into your neck once more despite the faint strain in his lower back that he was feeling at this angle. “Baby love, I may be super drunk right now, but imma tell you somethin’, ‘kay?”

“I’m all ears, baby.” You mused.

“One day, and I’m hopin’ it’s soon, m’gonna ask you to be my wife and we’re gonna have lots and lots of babies—if that’s what you want, of course. Hopefully my swimmers are healthy n’such but if not, then there's other options. Hey—why are you gigglin’ over there?” He pouted his lips against your skin, tilting his head back so he could look over at you.

“Baby, my sweet, sweet, dark haired man, I am your wife! We’re on our honeymoon right now, Joel.” You softly reminded him as you held back your giggles as best as you could.

“WHAT? Oh my goodness—you’re my wife? Oh, goodness! I really am that lucky, huh? Wait, lemme see the ring! I better have picked out a good one or so help me—”

“Joel!” You giggled, “those Mai Tais really got to you, huh? You had the ring custom made, baby.” You stopped walking, letting him grab your left hand in his big warm palm and ogle at the dainty rock on your ring finger.

His eyes were dazzling like the stars glimmering above as he brought your hand to his lips and pressed his lips to your fingers and one to the ring. “Very, very, beautiful.” He hummed. “I have good taste, huh?”

“You do, baby. You have wonderful taste and I’m so lucky.” You preened.

“No, no, I am the lucky one here, baby. And tomorrow mornin’ when I wake up hungover, imma treat you sooo fuckin’ well. Breakfast in bed, mine between your thighs, of course. And then I’m gonna feed you my cock—”

You shushed him with a sweet kiss to his lips, “I love you so much, my sweet dark haired man.”

“Mmm.” He hummed against your lips, pulling you in closer, “I love you more, my baby love. Can I pump you full of my babies tomorrow mornin’, please?”

“You’re such a horndog, Mr. Miller.” You giggled against his lips, kissing him deeper, “You can pump me full of your babies, okay? And maybe we’ll get lucky and one of them will stick?”

“Jus’ how you like me, Mrs. Miller. Oh, and one of ‘em will stick. I believe in my trusty little swimmers.” He slowly pulled back from the kiss so he could look at you.

You took all of him in from his messy hair, to his beautiful brown eyes, the flush to his neck and the apples of his cheeks, his swollen lips from your kisses, and his glistening tanned chest peeking out through the opening of his shirt.

“You’re so beautiful, Joel.” You breathed out, and you could feel tears begin to prick in the corner of your eyes.

He sniffled, eyes equally as glassy, and he brought his warm palms to rest along your cheeks, and gently pressed his forehead against yours, “my baby love, if you don’t quit that sweet talkin’, I’m gonna turn into a puddle of waterworks.” He playfully warned you.

“Okay, Mr. drunk sappy pants, let’s get you home.” You pecked his lips one last time before wrapping your arm back around his waist so he could lean into you.

“Lead the way, baby love.” He whispers soft and sweet, drunk on Mai Tais and your love.

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[sofmoth]

I Found My Place in This World (It’s in Your Wake)

here’s my entry for @beefrobeefcal’s september prompt!!! this is fairly out of my comfort zone so i do hope you all enjoy it! title is from 'she's the prettiest girl at the party and she can prove it with a solid right hook' by frank iero, work is not inspired by the song.

the photoshop is MYOB (mind your own business) mkay

also posted to AO3 by me (@sofmoth), link here.

divider created by @animatedglittergraphics-n-more

husband!joel miller x wife!reader, WC: 1.03k

TAGS: husband!joel, anniversary dinner, all the fluff, chubby!joel, marriage has caused joel to gain weight, soft!joel, no physical description is given of reader, reader uses an inhaler, joel is goofin, POV u become one with the couch, joel calls reader “sweetie,” joel jokingly asks if he’s fat, reader jokingly calls themself “delicate," fuck i love this man

It’s officially been one year since you tied the knot, one whole year of living with your husband full-time. Joel had been fairly insistent that you lived separately until you got married, despite the fact that you spent more nights with him than without during your engagement. You never really minded, he had a mortgage to pay on his house but was still more than willing to help you with your rent until the day came.

One year later, and marriage had been good to Joel. His mental health and financial stability had improved, and he seemed overall a happier person. The only drawback seemed to be the effect it had on his waistline. It was only a drawback according to your brother-in-law Tommy; you love the way Joel’s belly had softened over the last twelve months.

No longer was he forgetting to eat breakfast, packing himself a half-assed lunch to take to his job sites, nor was he attempting to pass off three-day-old pizza as a full dinner. If you could go back in time ten years, tell your younger self you have a husband you love cooking for, you would vomit on your own shoes. Being who you are now though, it’s a joy to make him a meal, fulfilling to see how happy it makes him that you’ve ensured he eats well in the early mornings and has proper lunches to keep him strong until dinner. The way he relaxes on the couch with you after, pulling you on top of him to cuddle, the wonderful healthy squish of his tummy between you a reminder to you both that love is not all in the way one looks.

He had been self-conscious at first, when he stepped on the scale and saw the number had increased. You very quickly put that worry to bed, assuring Joel every day that he was still the sexiest man alive. You told him how sexy he was irritatingly regularly, and then he started to believe it. He started walking around the house in his PJ pants with his shirt off again, you begging him to flex, him obliging. Joel’s belly and the weight he gained were the most physical and personal reminders of how much you loved him.

To celebrate this first full year of your marriage, you made a fabulous meal so you could stay in for the night and enjoy it together. Pot roast and potatoes, enough rolls to choke a horse, two or three glasses of wine. Joel is doing the dishes, you lay on the couch watching him across the room. He glances back at you, smiling, and you wave with your fingers. The wine has certainly hit you; you’re not drunk by any stretch, but you’re definitely more comfortable horizontal. You close your eyes, listening to the sink run for a few minutes before the last dish clinks in the drying rack and the water stops.

“Wow. My wife made such an amazing dinner, and I’m so tired from doing those dishes. I think I’d like to sit and rest.” You can hear the dry playfulness in his voice, eyes still closed.

“Boy oh boy, that couch looks comfy. I think I’ll have a seat riiiiight here.” Your eyes fly open, hand covering your mouth as you cackle at the feeling of him sitting on your shins.

“Joel! No, c’mon! If you’re gonna sit on me, at least sit on my thighs. I’m so delicate.” Joel rolls his eyes, smiles as he scoots up.

“You’re right, this cushion is way more comfortable. I think I could fall asleep here, matterfact I just might.”

You reach for him, pinching his side playfully. He does sit on your thighs for a few minutes, arms stretched across the back of the couch, head tilted back and eyes closed. The muscles in your legs finally begin to feel like TV static, and despite the fact that you’ve sobered up considerably it’s still not a particularly pleasant sensation.

“Oh shit, baby my legs are falling asleep. Bit’s over, I gotta move ‘em.” Joel looks down at you, mouth open in mock-offense.

“Is my wife calling me fat? On our one-year wedding anniversary, of all days? How dare you, I cannot believe this.”

Still, he does get up; long enough to lay his entire body on top of yours. He nuzzles into your neck, his beard scratching your skin softly. He sighs deeply, squeezes you in a hug as you rest your hand on his back. And then he raspberries you.

You squeal, laughing wildly as he begins laying a barrage of kisses to your neck and face. You laugh so hard you start struggling to pull in a full breath, and Joel jumps up quickly to get your inhaler out of your purse. You’re still laughing, now coughing and wheezing at the absurdity of the situation. He shakes the little plastic container thoroughly before uncapping it and handing it to you, tugging you upright before you press the canister and inhale.

He rubs your back as you hold your breath, exhaling slowly with you. He presses a kiss to your temple, taking the inhaler back and replacing it in your purse. As he sits back down he pulls you into his lap, cradling you against himself.

“I’m sorry sweetie, I got a little carried away. You feel okay?”

“Yeah, I’m good. It wasn’t full-blown, I was just getting too wound up. Thank you for getting it, though.”

“Of course. Don’t want my wife taking a trip to the emergency room, especially not on our special day. Here, lemme—”

He shifts so he’s laying on his back, holding you on his chest as always. He continues rubbing your back, occasionally kissing the top of your head.

“Hey, husband?”

“Yes, wife?”

“That joke you made about me calling you fat, it wouldn’t matter to me at all if you actually were.”

“I know, sweetie.”

You rub Joel’s shoulder gently with your thumb, feeling yourself growing tired from the steady rhythm and pressure of his hand on your back.

“You can go to sleep, we’ll be okay out here tonight.” You hum.

“Joel?”

“Yeah, sweetie?”

“I love you.”

“I love you, too.”

[joeldjarin]

[chaotic-iguana]

Hello, I would like to request a story about Joel (no apocalypse) who picking up reader from their workplace. However, as the reader is walking towards the car, she experience a hit-and-run accident or another type of accident (you can choose freely).

Joel, who witnesses the accident becomes extremely panicked and protective during and after reader out the hospital. Joel is deeply traumatized and afraid that something bad might happen to the reader. I need fluff and angst Joel and you are excellent at creating it 🥺💖

thank you anon! you’re so sweet, i really appreciate you and the prompt! im going to make this an installment of the husband! joel verse (introduced in tease)

Borrowed time

Summary: Reader gets hurt, and Joel doesn’t know how to deal with it. (no-outbreak! au)

Wordcount: 1.7K

Pairing: husband joel x f! reader (no use of y/n)

Warning: angst, hurt/comfort, near-death experiences, blood, a little gore, allusions to sex 

masterlist

Your car had broken down last week, so Joel had been dropping you off and picking you up from work. You’d resisted at first, suggested walking or cycling or even the bus - all of which had been met with the same incredulous expression etched onto your husband’s face, an eyebrow raised at you in amusement. ‘As if, honey’ was all he’d snark at you before shushing you when you tried to argue about the fact that this would add an hour and a half to his route after dropping Sarah off in the mornings and  two hours in the evenings, which felt unsustainable for you since your car was at the mechanic’s garage for the foreseeable future. At that, he’d just huff and mumble something about not minding the extra time with you that much, and your heart would just melt again. 

The two of you settled into the new routine fairly quickly; Joel chuckling at your sleepy grumbling in the mornings and getting teased by you when he was grumpier and complaining about his aching back in the evenings. “Too far past your bedtime, old man?”, paired with a shit-eating grin as you watched him scowl and shake his head at you, turning back to the road as his lips twitched ever-so-slightly upwards. Enough for you to make iterations of the same joke every evening, just to watch him fight his smile. 

On a seemingly normal thursday morning, you’d been slightly distracted by a meeting you had with your bosses. The board of directors, actually, and the anxiety was practically crippling you by the time Joel was ushering you and Sarah into his truck. There was just so much that could go wrong, but if it went right, it would result in a massive promotion with a pretty nifty raise and four-day work weeks. Which sounds amazing, but you were sure it would feel even better. A whole extra day? 

Joel rested a hand on your knee to stop its bouncing, the warmth of his palm seeping through your jeans and immediately crushing the wave of nervousness that had been rising in you. “Look at me, sweetheart. You’re gonna crush it. And ‘f for whatever reason you don’t, we’ll go out an’ watch that movie you’d been wantin’ to, even pig out on icecream after. Whaddya call it? Self-care.” His words made you burst out laughing and lean over to kiss his cheek. 

“That actually sounds good. And for the record, I call taking a bubble bath self care, not swallowing five pints of icecream at three am. Like you apparently have the ability to.” He mock-frowned while beaming in the rear-view mirror. 

“Technically honeymoons are to learn new things about each other. Plus, we’d been fuckin’ an’ passin’ out with damn near no breaks f’thirty six hours at that point. A man’s gotta have some fuel to keep up with that kinda pace, no?” He snickered as he glanced at you with a pointed look. To be fair, you had, in fact been fucking till you passed out for the first three days of your trip to Italy, and you’d both only realised how hungry you were when neither of you had the energy to leave the bed. It was three am, and for some inconceivable reason, most restaurants had closed. So Joel had walked into the nearest grocery and just gotten 5 huge tubs of icecream and some waterbottles. While it worked great as fuel, you and Joel had been forced to spend two consecutive days holding each others’ hair back and eating proper meals, because as it turns out, eating four meals’ worth of icecream on empty stomachs does not sit well. 

“Seemed pretty good at keeping up when you fingered me in a full restaurant just because the waiter asked to get some wine for your missus.” You retorted back, shaking your head at how insatiable he’d been, too. It had taken a whole week for the nearl-feral glint in his eyes while referring to you his wife to fade - even then, not completely. 

“Never gonna tire of hearin’ that, you know.” Turning the corner to pull up to your stop, he leaned down for a sweet, slow kiss before leaning back to whisper softly. “You’re gonna do well, baby. You’re the smartest person I’ve ever seen, alright? Don’t you worry about a damn thing.” At your wordless nod, he kissed your forehead. “Go get ‘em, honey.” With nod and a parting greeting, you turn and walked into the building. 

After a long but extremely successful day, you rushed out of work the second your phone buzzed with Joel’s message, practically vibrating with the need to give him the good news. Brows furrowing, you scanned your surroundings looking for his truck. You caught his wave out of the corner of your eye and  returned it with a breathless laugh, striding in his direction and failing to notice the smudge of black approaching your side rapidly. The last thing you saw before your vision went black was Joel’s wide, panicked eyes and the urgency with which he pushed his door and stumbled out. For a second, it felt like you were in the air, limbs flailing. A second of impact; a sharp pain settling in your right leg, before you were out. 

Your eyes heaved open, blurry, and you heaved your head to the side to see Joel holding your hand and stroking your head, tears running down his face. You were lying in the middle of the road, surrounded by a crowd of concerned passengers. Joel’s mouth was moving, but you couldn’t hear him- in fact, you couldn’t hear anything except for a high-pitched tone buzzing in your ear. There was blood on his shirt, and before you could ask whose it was, you noticed it coated your hands, too. Looking down, you caught a glimpse of your thigh, flesh ripped open as bone jut out from its side, just before your eyes rolled back and consciousness slipped from your grasp once again. 

When you woke, it took you far too much effort to wrench your eyes open. Blinking against the painfully blinding lights overhead, you opened your mouth to call someone, anyone, to explain where the hell you were and why the beeping coming from next to you was so damn loud. Even your thoughts were lagging, unable to piece together why you were in this room that definitely wasn’t your own. Images of your previous waking moments flashing in your mind, you felt alarm building in your chest as your breath began coming in short gasps. Suddenly, something in your peripheral vision moved and suddenly Joel was here, his large hand cupping your face as he urged you to breathe. It took a minute - maybe even more- for lucidity to return to your rapidly-spiraling mind, but he stayed unwaveringly calm as he held you patiently and waited for you to come back. 

“W-“ you wince at the dryness of your throat, at how hoarse your voice sounds from lack of use. “What happened?” You tried again, clearing your throat this time. Joel’s soft eyes met yours, lips turned downwards in a frown. 

“Fuckin’ idiot drivin’ a car was on his phone, texting when you started crossin’ the road. Bastard didn’t see ya, and one second you were smilin’ so sweet at me, an’ by the next you were on the floor, bone stickin’ outta your thigh. Closest I’ve ever been to a heart attack.” You could fear fraying at the edges of his voice as you moved your hand up to hold his, cradling it to your cheek. “Asshole drove away, too. Didn’t even get his number plate ‘cause I was so fuckin’ scared for you.” He looked away, tears filling his eyes. 

Reaching out to stroke his jaw, you nudged him to look at you again. “‘M sorry, honey. Should have been more careful. Think I would have gone crazy if I ever had to see you like that.” You murmured, feeling your heart break at seeing Joel this scared, this frantic. He shook his head. 

“Not your fault, baby. None ‘f it, ya hear me? ‘M just so glad you’re okay. Rest up, sweetheart, you need it right now.” You nod, kissing the back of his hand as you lean back in your bed.

The next few days in the hospital go by in a blur, Joel refusing to leave your side for a single minute. His hand is always somewhere on you: holding yours, stroking your face, your hair. Sarah hadn’t come in at your request; you hadn’t wanted her to see you in a hospital bed, unable to move much. When the time to get discharged rolled around, Joel seemed even tenser, his grip on you tighter. It took some time for you to get the cast taken off, which on one hand was an extreme relief, it also meant that you now had to attend regular physiotherapy sessions to regain full mobility. 

The real adjustment, however, was the way Joel would straighten and tense up any time you left home after that. The way he grabbed your hand when you crossed streets; accompanying you even to the pharmacy down the block. At first, it irked you. Then, you realised what he had been through. If the roles had been reversed, you’d want to accompany him everywhere too. His fear was very real and very valid - one of his worst nightmares had just taken place in front of him, afterall, and if all he needed to feel a bit better was to walk you to places you needed to go, then you’d indulge him for as long as it took for him to realise that you were safe. 

It lasted a few months, but as you returned to normal, so did he. Your car came back from the garage, but Joel still drove you. Not because of his fear, or because he had to, but just to revel in that extra hour he got out of it. He’d learned that time was precious, and he wanted to spend every conceivable second of his with you and Sarah. 

hello loves, as always - thank you for reading. comment your thoughts or find me on ao3. stay hydrated and have a great day! taglist: @imherefordeanandbones @theywhowriteandknowthings, @josephquinnswhore AMAZING dividers by @cafekitsune!! absolute god who makes amazing dividers for free! 

[builtaworldwithyourlove]

Free Falling

Chapter Two

2k/ (eventual) husband!joel x f!reader /minors dni

‘I felt very still and very empty, the way the eye of a tornado must feel’

Summary: you take the leap to leave your stagnant relationship, and end up falling into the arms of a man who will give you the life you always dreamed of. 

Content: loveless relationship, mention of TW: domestic violence, emotional abuse, age gap (reader is mid-late 20s, Joel is late 30s-mid 40s), angst, allusions of cheating, sad sad sad but Joel will save the day, slow burn, smut, fluff, oc(reader’s boyfriend and friends/family), mention of reader grieving loss of her dad, swearing, smoking, alcohol consumption, lovely lovely baby boy Joel, reader is a sweetheart, sexual tension, no smut just yet, some physical description of reader, Let me know if I’ve missed anything.

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Saturday morning was glorious. Your bedroom was fortunately positioned so that the sun shone through your white cotton curtains, and woke you up naturally. Although you didn’t get to revel in the peace for long, as Leo decided to scale the curtains and cry for help as he got stuck in limbo.

With a sigh, you rolled out of bed. You scooped Leo up in your arms and held him whilst you made the rounds opening all the windows and setting the house up for the day.

The coffee machine was the most important visit of the day. You were an early riser, so your 7am coffee was the surest way to keep you somewhat personable. You put some music on and started to tidy your kitchen, when your phone started ringing. It was Joel.

‘Morning, could you text me your address? I’ll be there within the hour.’ 

‘Sure! I’ll get the coffee ready now’ you replied.

Joel chuckled ‘See ya.’

Someone’s not a morning person, you thought to yourself. 

You let Joel know to let himself in round the back in case you didn’t answer as you were getting yourself ready. You ran up the stairs, trying to ignore the excitement in your chest. It would be the first time you’d have  some potential male attention, although he was an old family friend, surely he wouldn’t see you in that way. You got out of your head, made your bed and sprayed it with your fabric freshener, then lit a stick of incense followed by your favourite sedona sandstone candle.

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You showered and drenched yourself in cocoa butter and your Flora Luminare perfume. The doorbell rang and you skipped downstairs to answer.

Joel stood there, towering over you. He was gorgeous. Chiselled, tanned, the deepest brown eyes and softest looking lips.

He stood there taking you in. You were shorter than him, your hair fell down to your waist and he was encompassed by a cloud of your scent. He could’ve fallen to his knees in awe of you. He remembered the brief moments he had seen you before. It was always after one too many beers, but he knew he found you were beautiful. You made him laugh too, you were always as if butter wouldn’t melt, trying to keep your asshole ex-boyfriend sweet. But he remembered you sneaking smokes in the front yard at family parties, or downing a shot of tequila in the kitchen on your own when things got too much. The sparkle in your eyes never dulled, and your smile never faded.

‘Hey, thanks for coming so early’ you smiled.

Joel shook himself out of his daze.  He winked at you and put his hand on your shoulder.

‘No problem, show me the damage darling.’

His eyes twinkled and he smirked as you placed your hand on Joel’s. You squeezed his hand and gestured him in. 

He examined every part of your house on the way to your bedroom. The baby pink accents, the kitten toys scattered all over the place, and the framed pictures of you with your friends and family.

You quickly joined him with a mug of coffee. You sat cross-legged on the bed. You were wearing baby pink yoga pants and a plain white cropped tee. He looked you up and down, very brazen and not ashamed. You blushed and adjusted yourself to let Leo join you.

‘You the clumsy type then?’ Joel sized up the hole in the wall, and looked over his shoulder at you, with an eyebrow raised.

‘Erm, my ex-boyfriend. Fragile masculinity and alcohol’ you looked down and Joel cringed. He faced you and rested his hands on his hips. Your throat went dry and you couldn’t tell if you were turned on or terrified of being told off for letting yourself in that situation.

‘I’m sorry, baby’ Joel dropped his head and started fixing the wall. 

You watched him intently. His arms flexing as he worked his magic. You let Joel finish as you went downstairs to fix up some food for him to take with him.

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‘The wall’s fixed. Anything else I can do?’ Joel startled you and you hopped round and laughed.

He took the second mug of coffee you offered him and gazed at you. 

‘I need my locks changed’ you rifled down your drawers unable to find the replacement locks, then you remembered you had put them in your glass cabinet. 

The pictures of your dad faced outward as you opened the door to the cabinet, and Joel felt his heart drop. He was so fond of your dad, and couldn’t imagine the shit you had been through this past year. 

He chuckled and took the locks out of your hands. 

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‘I’m all done, is that everything?’ Joel poked his head round the doorway of your dressing room. You grinned as you finished applying your lipgloss and turned around to Joel.

‘Yes thank you, Mr Miller’ you winked.

He turned as if to go. ‘Wait, wait, wait’ you clambered up out of your seat, ‘I’ll see you out.’

Joel gestured to let you lead the way and you half curtsied. He was intrigued. You were so high energy and like a ball of sunshine, and he felt like he was 18 again.

He got his stuff ready and began to head back to the car. 

‘Erm, Joel. I’m having my family and friends round tonight for some drinks. I’d love you to come, to say thank you for your help. Clara and Rufus will be there, so will Mum and the girls’ you felt embarrassed and desperate, but Joel made you feel safe.

‘I wouldn’t miss it for the world, text me a time’ Joel winked and waved as he headed back towards his truck.

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You were a woman infatuated. Joel occupied every corner of your mind. You slid on your flip flops and grabbed your purse before heading to get food and drink for your night of hosting.

You stopped off to drop Rufus and Clara’s lunch to their shop.

‘Now when were you going to tell me Mr Miller is devastatingly handsome?’ You burst through the door of the florist.

‘Well I thought it would be a welcome surprise’ Clara smirked.

‘He’s already called. Said he’s looking forward to seeing us tonight, and that you are an absolute angel.’ Rufus hooked his arm around you, roughing you up as you both do.

‘Eeek! I’m obsessed’ you twirled round and waved yourself out the door. You blew a kiss and practically waltzed down to your car.

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‘Come here anytime from 4:30pm. Wear something pretty😉’ you felt bold after the margaritas you had downed whilst getting ready with the girls. Lottie, Jess and Rhea were your absolute world. You were dancing around the bedroom and dressing room, blaring your music and feeling half tipsy.

It was 3:37pm, and Joel sat at home waiting restlessly to leave. He decided to call your Auntie and Uncle and get a lift with them. 

‘Who are you texting?’ Rhea snatched your phone out of your hand.

‘Stop, you can’t even judge me on this. He’s the hottest man I’ve ever seen. He fixed some bits up in the house yesterday. Knows Rue and Clara, an old family friend. He’s coming tonight’ you girls all squealed in unison.

Rhea still had your phone and headed straight to Facebook. She got Joel’s profile up right away and mocked you with it. She accidentally liked a photo from 3 years ago, and her face dropped. You all went silent before freaking out. She threw your phone to the center of your bed. 

It lit up:

Facebook:

One new friend request- Joel Miller

Chaos ensued, and you were quick to accept it.

Joel texted you letting you know they were on their way. You felt giddy.

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Your mum and sisters arrived and you set your sisters up in the summerhouse at the end of the garden with some of their friends they had bought along. You made them mocktails and let them have free roam of your beauty drawers and facemasks beforehand.

You switched on the fairylights around your garden, and you and the girls sat debriefing on life with your mum and her best friend.

Joel and the rest of your family creeped round through the side gate. You stood up to greet them and your auntie and uncle held you tightly before sauntering off to see your mum and sisters. A few more family acquaintances turned up, and people you know and love, but this was all a daze as Joel kissed your cheek and pulled you in for a cuddle.

His dark curls were swept backwards, with the exception of one that fell over his forehead. ‘Thank you for having me’ he whispered into your ear.

You traced down his arms to his hands, and you squeezed them as if to say thank you. His hands lingered on your waist, perhaps a second too long and the girls couldn’t help but wolf whistle. 

Joel laughed, and headed over to meet everyone.

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The night was beautiful, everyone had too much food and drink, but everyone was happy and content. Your sisters and friends had crashed out in the spare room, which was fine, you loved having guests.  Your mum left after you assuring her you’d be fine to drop the girls off home tomorrow. Your friends had booked an uber to go to the club, but you were more of a homebody, plus Joel had stuck around and you didn’t want him to leave.

You cleared the glasses and bottles away in the kitchen, Joel offered to help but he sat at the table and watched you instead. 

You offered him a cigarette from your hidden box which was in the empty biscuit tin. You sat next to eachother on the backdoor step. The sun was setting and it caressed his features and soaked them in a golden hue. Everything had been moving in double speed since you met him, and now was the first time you got to take in every bit about him, and was also the first time you noticed he did the same to you. He made you laugh until your stomach hurt, and you made him feel relaxed. As you laughed, you leaned into his side, and he wrapped his arm over your shoulders and placed a kiss upon the top of your head.

You looked up at him and he kissed you. Deeply and passionately and carefully. You relaxed your arms over his shoulders and as you deepened the kiss. Then tested the waters and held onto his neck, under his jawline, and pulled him towards you.

‘I wanted to do this since I saw you,’ Joel tilted his forehead pressed against yours, and you grinned. ‘What are you doing tomorrow?’

‘No plans, tackling the aftermath of this I think. Why do you ask?’ Joel stroked your thigh with his thumb. It was cold from nursing a beer, but it was welcome.

‘Would you like to go on a date with me?’ Joel felt shy, and anxious.

‘I wouldn’t want to do anything else. Text me the details, and I’ll be there’ you blushed and kissed his cheek.

‘I’ll pick you up at 5pm baby’ Joel kissed your cheek and headed out as he stumbled towards the cab he had booked.

He sat in the back of the cab and motioned a phone with his hand and mouthed call me. You blew a kiss and waved him off, giggling like a school girl as he waved out of the window of the car.

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You showered and headed to bed, high on life and feeling like you were floating. 

‘Good evening Mr Miller’ you tried your best at flirting, and following Joel’s orders to call him. 

‘I’ve been wondering when you’d call’ he yawned.

‘Bad timing?’

‘Never bad timing with you. I’d answer your call at any second of any day.’ His southern drawl flipped your stomach.

‘I’ll remember that, I may need you a lot from now on.’ You rolled over and snuggled into your pillow.

‘You get some sleep baby. I can’t wait to see you tomorrow’ 

You hung up the phone, texted Joel goodnight and slept through the night in peace.

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Tag list:

@iamsherlocked-1998

@sugakookieswithmilk

@galway-girlatwork

[jfksbrainmatter]

it’s so, sweet <3

joel miller x reader

song : sweet- cigarettes after sex

genre : fluff 🧸

summary : your 1 yr anniversary with joel is in a few days, he wanted to surprise you with a gift!

author note : HAIIII this is my first post ever i’m so nervous lmao, i hope you enjoy it-!! 🤍🤍

wc : 669 (sex number lolz)

as you were making dinner you heard the front door open- your joel is home! he’s been at work since 6 am, having only sent him off with a tired kiss this morning, you’ve missed him so much today. your feet shuffle as you turn off the stove, antsy to greet (suck face with) your husband.

“m’home baby!!” joel calls out in that deep southern accent you adore as he closes the front door, smiling widely as he hears your excited feet racing down the hall to see him.

“joel!!” you yell out as you crash into him, wrapping your arms around his waist tightly, inhaling the scent that is just so joel.

“how was yur’ day puddin’..?” he asks teasingly, planting a kiss to your lips and twirling a piece of your soft hair in his fingers.

kissing back passionately, you mumble against his lips, “better now that you’re home~ you’ve been gone all dayyy…i’ve missed you.” joel chuckles as your lip juts out in a pretty pout, chasing after his lips as he pulls back.

“m’sorry babydoll…have to make money so i can get ya all those pretty little dresses you love so much~” joel strokes your cheek as he coos at you, whispering lowly in your ear, “speakin’ of pretty little dresses, i have a surprise for ya” he chuckles as he watches your smile widen, excited to have surprised you successfully, “it’s out in the car.”

you fight to get your house slippers on before running out of the house, leaving him inside. giggling as you pull at the car’s door handle, yelling out for joel to unlock it as he walks down the steps toward you. you smile giddily as he walks over, unlocking the backdoor just for you to rip it open, “careful sweetheart-“ joel grunts out for ‘disrespecting’ his truck. you start to complain about how his truck is older than you but when you see the big, shiny gift box sitting in the seat you stop, a giant smile plastering onto your face.

“open it..” joel wraps his arms around your waist from behind as he whispers those two words in your ear. he starts laughing when you excitedly rip at the shiny paper on the box as he strokes your sides lovingly.

when you open the box you gasp in awe, seeing the most beautiful pale pink dress you’ve ever seen sitting in the box, you pull it out with a giggly smile.

“oh joel it’s so pretty!! i love it- thank you-!!” turning around to hug him while still holding the dress, you see his proud smile. wrapping your arms around his neck while the dress rests in your right arm.

“i’d hoped you would. happy early anniversary honey~” joel mutters as he kisses your forehead and hugs you around the waist. he loves you so much. his eyes stare into yours, deep pools of love peering into your soul.

“happy anniversary~” you reply, leaning in to place a simple kiss to his lips, humming in satisfaction as he pulls you even closer, deepening the kiss. you pull back and notice that joel’s eyes are filled with tears. you cup his cheek affectionately.

“baby..?” you ask worriedly, afraid you did something wrong. joel shakes his head and waves you off, wiping his eyes with his rough, calloused hands.

“i jus’ love ya so much sugar- sorry-“ said ‘stoic’ joel miller. except you are the only person who gets to see your husband like this. only you.

as he apologizes you kiss his cheek, wiping the remaining tears on his lashes. “don’t apologize for being emotional babe. i think it’s very endearing…and a little attractive to know you love me so much.” you giggle as you see his ‘intimidating’ glare, it’s easy to see through a man in love. “c’mon dinner is getting cold-“

you smile as joel composes himself, watching as he walks away and closes his truck door before walking back over to you. he wraps an arm around your waist and kisses your head before he walks you back into the house. you stare at him as you walk into the house, adjusting the dress on your arm and whispering in his ear,

“you’re so sweet.”

TYSM FOR READING!! i love husband!joel and this is like UGH feeding my addiction.

[ilovejoel-andjavi]

hi! anyone knows where “the girl from IT” joel fic is?? i’ve been searching it for a while and hasn’t found it yet

thanks!! xx

update: i found it!! thank you so much!!

[leylila]

attempt #2 at mapping the joel polycule

attempt #1

i don't watch empires, so i'm sorry if i got their relationships wrong. thanks to everyone for their suggestions! and yes, these are only flirty/romantic relationships. if this is difficult to read or understand, blame joel not me

i'm not making this again, i'm not making this again -> watch me eat my words

[goldenispunk]

[butt3rb33-cus-they-stole-my-e]

I'm sure some of these have already been done before but I got too excited for the next season and made a bunch and still have many more ideas

[4ever-feral]

Appreciation post for Joel miller and his slicked back hair 😮‍💨

[tubbytarchia]

Hanging with the homies...

[builtaworldwithyourlove]

Free Falling

Chapter Four

3.3k+ / (eventual) husband!joel x f!reader /minors dni

‘I felt very still and very empty, the way the eye of a tornado must feel’

Summary: you take the leap to leave your stagnant relationship, and end up falling into the arms of a man who will give you the life you always dreamed of. 

Content: age gap (reader is mid-late 20s, Joel is late 30s-mid 40s), angst,smut, fluff, oc(reader’s ex-boyfriend and friends/family), mention of reader grieving loss of her dad, swearing, smoking, alcohol consumption, lovely lovely baby boy Joel, reader is a sweetheart, lil time hop, planning Joel’s birthday bash

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Summer was over and the nights were getting longer and colder. Joel was still the man of your dreams, and you were still as infatuated with eachother three months later, as you were at the start. Things were moving slowly, and he hadn’t popped the big girlfriend question yet, but you had both agreed it was just about you two.

Every Sunday you tried to do something together, whether it was a date or a trip to Target and TJ Maxx. Your work schedule was crazy and Joel was held up with a huge work project, but you didn’t mind because you got eachother back at the end of each day. It was a blessing.

Today was Tuesday and you were in the office twiddling your thumbs, planning Joel’s birthday this weekend. The girls group chat was buzzing as your friends helped you with ideas.

The idea which had been stuck in your mind was giving Joel a spare key, but was this okay if you weren’t even his girlfriend yet? You were had fallen for him, and he never fails to make you feel special.

‘Love has no timeline’ your mom always reminded you. The girls agreed there was no issue. You were just scared, but that’s okay. Joel had been there to catch you everytime.

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The day went quickly, and you headed to Target after work for a treat yourself spree. Joel texted asking if you were free tonight, which was unlike him as he never asked you, he just told you what the plans were. You were suspicious but told him to come over and you’d do dinner for you both and you could catch up on the junk TV you found yourselves hooked on.

You got home, showered and changed into a matching loungewear set and greeted Joel at the door. You were in your pink fluffy robe, and Leo was sat in the pocket.

‘Damn kitten,’ Joel rolled his eyes. ‘He’ll stretch it out then you’ll be moaning about your droopy dressing gown.’

‘Well who ruffled your feathers, asshole?’ You turned round and walked through, letting Joel make his own way in the house.

You made yourself a dirty martini, and saved the olives for Joel,  as he always stole them from you.

He tutted and shook his head. ‘I’m sorry baby, I’ve just got a lot on my mind.’

‘Tell me. A problem shared is a problem halved’ you leaned over the counter and rested your chin in your hands.

‘Let’s talk after dinner. I’m starving.’ Joel kissed you and patted your hip as he got up and grabbed the dinner plates. 

You sat at the table in the chairs opposite eachother. Your leg was tucked up under you, with the other resting on Joel’s leg. He squeezed your foot while you unpacked your day. With every word you spoke, his bad mood started to alleviate and the tension dissipated.

‘You go sit down baby, I’ll do the kitchen then I’ll be in’ Joel stood up and kissed your forehead.  You wrapped your arms round his neck and pulled him in for a proper kiss.

‘I love you’ Joel whispered. 

You looked up at him speechless.

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Already, you were half asleep on the sofa, and Joel slotted underneath you so your head was laying on his lap, and he was lounging backwards with his legs up on the coffee table. 

You turned onto your back, and your eyes locked. His back almost locked trying to reach down to kiss you, but he did it. He’d do anything to kiss you.

‘I love you too, you know?’ Your cheeks heated up and your voice cracked. Shit, this was happening and it felt terrifying.

‘Be my girlfriend, please? I want you to be mine for the rest of our time on Earth. Girlfriend just doesn’t cover it.’

You welled up, and Joel’s eyes shimmered with a mix of fear, hope and adoration.

‘Now why would you do that when you know I’m due on.’ You were now a sobbing wreck, trying to find the words to tell Joel yes.

‘I had to fit it in before my birthday, couldn’t risk not getting that extra birthday present from you.’ Joel dug his fingers into your ribs, unable to be serious for more than five seconds.

‘You and me for as long as we live. I’d love to be your girlfriend and everything else that comes with it.’ He tenderly ran the side of his thumb down your temple and behind your ear, before holding your cheek in his palm. You nudged into it and sat up to kiss him.

‘Thank you for showing me how life should be’ you whispered.

‘Thank you for being my reason for living.’ Joel held you tightly. So tightly you thought you might break, or even worse, so tightly you thought you’d snap back into reality. But this  was real. Joel was the one for you.

‘Will you stay at mine tonight?’ Joel asked.

‘Can you not stay here? I’m working from here tomorrow, would make things easier’ you batted your eyelashes and Joel sighed.

He got up and went to leave to go home and get his stuff. ‘Don’t expect me to bring you back a sweet treat’ he shouted halfway out the door.

You sighed contentedly and sprawled out on the sofa, scrolling through to find a film to watch.

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He got back to you  no longer than half an hour later, of course with some chocolate for you, and before you knew it, you were both snoring on the sofa, intertwined and sweating under the covers of a fleece throw.

Joel insisted on watching Scarface, and you insisted his little friend did not need to be greeted, no matter how many times he repeated the quote. You couldn’t deny his impression was spot on. Why was this man so damn good at everything?

It was only half eight in the evening, and Leo woke you up crying for his dinner. Neither of you were morning people so it took a good thirty seconds of staring at eachother confused before realising what planet you were on. Your limbs dragged behind you as you uncoiled yourself and got Leo fed and settled for bed.

The temperature had started to drop at night, but the best thing about fall was having an ice cold bedroom after leaving the windows open all day. You crept up the stairs, in case Joel had fallen asleep in typical fashion. Instead you were met by Joel in your bed, propped up and topless, reading through one of your self love books. 

His glasses sat on the tip of his nose, and his hair fell scruffily across his forehead. The snap of your body lotion bottle shook him from his daze, and he grinned his charming schoolboy grin at you, and tapped the empty space next to him.

With your knees practically buckling beneath you, you awkwardly walked/skipped/jogged to join Joel in bed. Facing eachother on your sides, you ran a finger down his face and traced his jawline, towards the middle of his chin and catching his bottom lip. His mouth parted and his breath hitched as you kissed him. The world fell silent, the moon watched from above and Joel held you tight. 

He rolled onto his back and you rested your head on his chest, ready for the sweetest sleep of your life so far.

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Work didn’t officially start until 9am, so you set your alarm for 8am, for a well deserved mid week lay in.

You were pleasantly surprised to find Joel still in bed next to you.

‘You can thank my little friend’ Joel smirked, ‘You have me to deal with all day.’

‘That means a day of absolutely no work getting done’ you kissed his cheek, and went to roll out of bed. He grabbed you by the waist and pulled you closer to him. 

‘I don’t want you to leave, it feels cold without you.’

‘You better join me in the shower then’ you whispered, before dragging him out of bed with you for the best way you knew to start his day.

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With an extra spring in his step, Joel hopped up the stairs to check how your day was going.

‘It’s 9:20am baby, what could have gone wrong in 20 minutes?’ You swivelled around on your chair, fluffy pink pen in hand. 

Fortunately, a couple of spare rooms in your house meant you got a seperate closet space and office space, although you anticipated something having to give with Joel spending more time at yours. Joel traced his fingers across polaroids hung like bunting across your wall, smiling to himself seeing you in wild places with your friends. He laughed at your versatility which ranged from a polaroid of you laid in the back of a cab with bottle of wine in hand and a feeble attempt at a peace sign and pout, to you in a gorgeous floor length dress with a champagne glass and your best friends either side.

He pulled up one of your decorative stools, which you assured him were not to bear human weight, and span you round in the chair, stopping you in front of him with a kiss on the tip of your nose.

‘What could’ve gone wrong in 20 minutes?’ He sits back, straddling the stool, and makes a pensive face before pacing around your office again.

You rolled your eyes, the same ones that you just couldn’t take off him.

‘Bath and body works announce the discontinuation of your favourite vanilla something candle’ he points at you.

‘Don’t even tempt fate with that’ you retort, ‘now Mr Miller, are you going to change my life, or are you going to get out my office and let me finish some work?’

‘Baby, your life changed the minute we met’ Joel stood by your window, silhouette skewed by the bright sunlight coming in behind him. He turned to face you and smiled.

‘Want me to do your fall lights on the summerhouse? Get it ready for Saturday. What do you say? Finish work, fall decoration shopping then a lazy night?’

‘You know me better than I know my self’ you stood up on tiptoes, wrapping your arms round his neck, and rubbing his ears between your thumb and pointer finger whilst rubbing your nose against his.

‘Well stop being lazy, and I’ll see you at 12pm for lunch’ Joel pushed his glasses up the bridge of his nose and stepped backwards out of your office, closing the door softly behind you.

You smiled and found yourself counting down the seconds before you could see Joel again.

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The sound of Kings of Leon showed you the way and found Joel sat in the summer house with Leo, waving a rainbow coloured toy in circles.

‘Lunchtime, Mr Miller,’ you cooed.

He parted his legs, and you perched on his thigh, balancing a tray of food in your hand as you kissed him tenderly. He supported your back as you got up to sit next to him for lunch. 

‘Much work left to do baby?’ 

‘No, pretty quiet day. Just waiting for the transitional stuff to come through for the new job’ 

‘New job? Do tell?’ He scooped Leo up in his arms and they both leaned in.

You giggled and told him all about the promotion, and your new team you were managing and the opportunities this would give you.

‘I’m so proud of you baby’ You had never heard a tone so soft from a man so tough, as he shook his head almost in disbelief.

‘I’m doing it for us,’ you whispered back, as Joel held your chin in the palm of his hand.

‘Well, your taste in fairy lights is exceptional’ He flicked the switch and stood with his hands on his hips, above his worn out belt.

‘I love them, baby! I look forward to getting the pumpkins out later.’

‘I have to say I’m looking forward to seeing them too’ Joel quipped, grabbing a handful of your hips and ass.

‘Yeah I’m definitely going to have to put out after everything you’ve done’ you joked with him, pretending to admit defeat. 

‘I’ll see you at 5pm’ he shouted, as you began to walk down the garden back to the office. You blew a kiss at him, resisting the urge to sprint to him and never let him go.

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The most spoilt kitten in the world slept on your lap all afternoon, whilst Joel kept your water bottle topped up and snack bowl filled in between his work calls.

5pm graced you with her presence, so you grabbed your coat and errand running purse, slipped into your Uggs and coated yourself in Amber Romance.

‘Got to go Tommy, see you this weekend bud. 8pm, her place. Don’t forget my presents’ Joel slipped his phone in his back pocket, and winked at you. His version of ‘How you doin’?’. 

‘You think you’re soooo slick’ you squinted sarcastically, whirling your key chain around your finger.

‘And you think you’re sooooo cool’ Joel put on his impression of your phone voice, and reminded you who was boss.

‘Okay I deserved that. Only letting you off because you’re the most handsome boyfriend ever.’

‘Agreed. Right, pumpkin spice time baby.’ Joel held open the front door, then strided to open your driver’s door whilst you locked up.

🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷

Fall shopping was completed, and you were looking forward to getting home and stuffing your face with Joel’s casserole and lazing on the sofa for the evening.

‘I don’t know, I just guess pinecones and mushrooms are for September, pumpkins are for October and then it’s seeing how far you can go before putting the Christmas tree up in November’ you justified the 250 dollar spending spree. 

‘You are an enigma’ Joel was intrigued, and he figured he had a lot to learn about life with a girl in her 20s. 

Joel held your thigh the whole journey home, whilst your Fall Feelings playlist soothed your brains after a so far busy week.

‘I don’t know where and I don’t know when. But I know we’ll be lovers again. I’ll see you someday before the end, I don’t know where and I don’t know when. But oh darling my heart’s on fire’

You smiled softly to the lyrics of what was now Joel’s favourite song in the world, his thumb rubbing your hand and you holding his hand like it was your last chance.

‘I didn’t know I could feel something so deeply.  I’ve loved things, but I’ve never been in love until now’ Joel looked out the window, watching the fields roll by,

You raised his hand in yours to kiss it. 

Comfortable silence fell throughout the car, and you were sure you floated from the car to the house. Elated, loved and secure.

🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷

The pair of you had finished decorating the house, and finally sat to have dinner. The air was filled with the scent of incense and cinnamon and vanilla candles, and the house had never felt more like a home.

‘Do you think Tommy can keep you busy Saturday until 8pm?’ You asked.

‘As long as you don’t throw me out silly early to put a few balloons up, then maybe we can come to an agreement’ he grabbed your knee under the table.

‘That’s one less gift you’re getting’ you flicked your hair off your shoulder.

Joel laughed and stroked your hand across the table. ‘I’m looking forward to it baby, just let me know what I can do to help.’

‘It’s your birthday silly, you let me do the running around. Any special requests?’

‘It is all down to you, princess. As long as you and the girls keep away from the tequila and it doesn’t turn into karaoke night.’ he ran his hand over his mouth and across his stubble. 

‘Boring, just for that I’m buying double tequila’ you walked past with the dinner plated in hand and flicked your heel up to playfully tap him.

🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷🧸🪷

The rest of the week flew by, Joel was busy with a few projects and you were in the office for the last couple of days.

It was a beautiful Saturday morning, there was a chill in the air but the sun shone through, and the red and orange leaves glistened from the morning dew.

The decision was hard, but you forced yourself out of bed at 7am, unwillingly peeling away from Joel to get yourself ready.

You hopped in the shower, washed your hair and rinsed off the way too dark tan guide colour. 

The errand running outfit was your favourite baby pink tracksuit, the zip up hoodie oversized for an off the shoulder style and your hair pin-curled up with military precision.

Joel woke up and stumbled into your office to find you slumped over your desk, vigorously writing your to do lists, shopping lists and list of lists that need creating. 

‘You look like a prawn sitting like that.’ He leaned against the door frame, one elbow supporting him, and the other hand on his hip. 

Your throat went dry at the sight of him. Shaggy hair, V-Lines that would be unachievable even if sculpted by Michelangelo himself and a morning voice drizzled in honey. 

‘And you look good enough to eat, but you don’t hear me making a fuss.’ You turned to face him, and reclined back in your chair.

He started walking towards you, and you sat up, straightening your back and locking eyes with him. Joel took a deep breath, as you held his hips in your hands and kissed across the skin above the waistband of his shorts, and you gently scratched your red nails down his tense core. 

‘Come here baby’ you whispered, pulling his shorts down to his knees. He stepped closer to you, and began to wince as you dragged your tongue across the underside of his cock. Moans echoed throughout the room as you took Joel deeper and deeper to the back of your throat, occasionally whimpering when he thrusted too deep. All he could manage was the words ‘babe’ and ‘so good’ as he melted.  

You knew his weaknesses and all the tricks to make him feel as much pleasure as possible. His bare thighs were painted with goosebumps, as you slowed down the pace and kissed down his hips before devouring him again. He grunted and held your throat delicately as he climaxed. There was an obscene glimmer in your eyes as you stared at him whilst he ran his thumb from the corner of your mouth to the middle of your bottom lip and you sucked his thumb in one slow motion.

‘Where have you been all my life?’ He pulled his shorts up and fell to his knees in front of you. 

‘Missing you, baby’ you pulled his head in to your chest and kissed the top of his head, taking in the scent of shampoo in his curls.

He laid against you for a while, trying to regain his strength. ‘FUCK, Tommy will be here any minute’ he bolted back into your bedroom to get his stuff before jumping in the shower.

Following him into the bathroom, you admired him for a while whist brushing your teeth again, and gave him a kiss through the shower curtain. 

‘I love you baby, will leave you both some coffee in the pot, I’m going to get Jess. I’ll see you tonight.’

You bounded down the stairs, grabbed an energy drink and bottle of water and headed to prepare for Joel’s party.

3 New Messages- 

Jessie🕺🏻

Ready when you are angel muffin, drive safe. 

Mumma🥹🩷

Heading to Costco’s, send me a list of what u need xx

Rufus👨‍🌾

got ur dried flower arrangement bring it later, see u tonight sweet girl, we love u

You smiled to your phone, feeling grateful. The best of friends by your side, a gorgeous boyfriend and the most caring family ever. Life was beautiful.

Tucking Leo in bed, you kissed his little furry forehead, slid into your Uggs and headed off  to spend way too much money. 

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Refuge | chapter two. 

prologue | chapter one | chapter two | masterlist 

chapter two: reluctant acquaintances 

wordcount: 1.3k summary: what if reader and joel were married before the outbreak? what if just another mundanely late night at the office on the night of the outbreak separated them for a decade? warnings: grief/mourning, estrangement still, developing?? re-relationships, contempt, guilt, survivor’s guilt, panic attack again, soft joel!, struggling joel!, i love ellie too she’s for sure a kid but a fucking good one, child loss. 

You hadn’t realised you were attacking her until she was nearly under you, her eyes wide and panicked staring straight into your own. 

When you finally did gain control of your own body, the jagged pen in your grip went scattering to the floor as you scrambled back on all fours, desperate to get yourself away from her. 

You had just nearly tried to stab a child. A scared fucking child. 

Guilt spread like fire in your veins, a weight settling on your chest as you tried to get your bearings. The voices around you seemed to get louder, fragments breaking the haze you were in. 

“…fucking apeshit she’s goddamn crazy, you know - almost choked Eugene when she got here…” 

A harsh bark of words you couldn’t quite make out ensured that voice fell silent. 

You didn’t care - the only word on your mind was Sarah, and it took a few moments for the hum in your ears to fade enough for you to recognise your own voice uttering her name over and over like a damned prayer. 

The sympathetic wince on the girl’s face while she reached a hand out to help you up had you recoiling further, tucking your knees into your chest to curl in on yourself. 

Just a dream. This is just a dream. I’ll wake up, and it’ll go away. 

Eyes squeezing shut, you pressed your forehead into the top of your knees, cradling them to your sternum, cold tile biting into your skin. The chatter increased, crescendoing as it echoed in your skull, until a single syllable was yelled out abruptly.

Footsteps sounded again, then pin-drop silence.

You refused to move; to open your eyes or to acknowledge this illusion your reality seemed to have woven itself into. Two large, heavy weights settled on your shoulders, wrenching a yelp from your lips, before an all-too-familiar face came into your swimming vision. Your frantic scan of the room turned up empty. The girl, Tommy, Fred - all gone. 

“You okay?”

A pause. Blinking seemed to be out of your realm of possibility - let alone answering him. But his gaze remained patient - warm and welcoming, even, as he waited for you to respond. It took you a minute, but his palms remained clamped on your shoulders, face just inches away. 

How could he still do that? Know exactly what you need. 

When your breath slowed down to normal and you could see more clearly, you swallowed painfully against the sudden dryness in your throat. 

“N-not real. ‘S not real.” 

When he made out what your hoarse whisper was repeating, his eyes softened further, hands moving down to grip your arms just above your elbows. 

“It is, honey. It’s real. ‘M right here, see?” He took your shaking hands and pressed your palms into either side of his face, stubble prickling against your skin.

You shook your head, mumbling and pulling away, comprehension evading you. “Not real. Not here.” 

His grip tightened, resisting your movement. He squeezed your wrists gently, making you look at him again. 

Joel was older now. He was just under ten years older than you when you had met - but you had fallen too hard to care, and loved the crinkle in eyes and smiles all the same. But his curls were gone now, shorter and washed grey. His beard was thicker, peppered with white, and the indent between his brows was deeper. None of that leapt out at you, though. It was his eyes - still as soft as you remembered them, but haunted now, shadows lurking just behind them, pouring melancholy into his gaze. 

But you were hardly the same, either. Lines had etched themselves on your forehead, next to your eyes, your mouth. Hair somehow darker, whites and greys smattered across your slightly receded hairline. Your hands shook now, and your lips had forgotten how to curve into a smile. 

Oh, how you wished for the innocence of youth again. To bring the sickly sweet pear of ignorance to your mouth and feel your teeth sink into its flesh once more.

Now, regret ran thick like honey down your throat until you couldn’t breathe. Your face must have given you away, because Joel’s voice began rumbling under your touch the second the thought crossed your mind.

“No, baby, no. Focus here. On me. Y’still gettin’ these? Who’s been takin’ care of ya?” He sounded so honest - so sincere. 

You fucking left me behind, Joel. Who the fuck else would even have tried? 

You just snorted in response instead, his face contorting into the expression of a broken man. As if this, now, was his final straw.   

“Yo-you’ve been alone? This whole time?” His question was so tentative, spoken so softly and cautiously - as if his mere formulation of it could change the outcome. 

A nod from you, and a sharp intake of his breath. Another pause. 

“Who else was supposed to take me in? You left, Joel. Don’t shoulder that responsibility on someone else.” How fitting, for the first words I speak to him in years to be scalding enough to make him wince. 

Your breath hitched at the tears that unexpectedly filled his eyes, or the fact that he had to look away. His hands dropped to his knees, shoulders curving in. The utter defeat written into every inch of him is enough to make you want to forgive him a hundred times, and then a thousand more. He looks like a vanquished god like this - brought to his knees, shoulders slumped and head bowed low. In another lifetime, you would have painted this moment until you ran out of paper. You settle for searing it into your mind, instead. 

“I-fuckin’ never shoulda stayed late at the office that day. Fuck.” 

Has he gone senile?

“…What? What the fuck, Joel? I’m the one who stayed late.” 

And he’s shaking his head; reaching out for your hands again; holding them against his chest. 

“I was late, too. It’s why I couldn’t pick you up - ‘cause Sarah called to cut the cake an’ wouldn’t take no for an answer - had to drive home and convince her to just wait. Second I did, everythin’ had gone to shit. Don’t even know where the fuckin’ cake went.”

A frown was carved onto your face as he spoke. You had assumed he simply hadn’t bothered to so much as phone you to warn you while him and Sarah sat on the couch.

“You got to her? Before it started?” His chin dipped to confirm the affirmative, and you let loose a breath you forgot you were holding. 

She’s safe, she’s okay. I’ll forgive him for fuckin’ anything if she’s okay. 

“That’s not Sarah, though, right? Did you leave her at a QZ? It’s safer there, atleast. I’m just glad she’s okay. Fuck, I am so fucking happy she’s okay.” Giddy with hope as it coursed through your veins, you barely noticed Joel’s face fall further at your words. 

“Joel? Which QZ?” Silence. His eyes were pointedly chasing away from yours, hands slackening their grip. 

Fear clamped her ruthless fist around your neck once more. 

“Where the fuck is my daughter, Joel? I want to know where she is. I’ll fucking-I’ll find her. I don’t give a shit. Where the fuck is she?” 

The crack in your voice said enough. So did the tears glistening on Joels cheeks. And the two of you knelt, in mocking prayer to a merciless God in mourning for the daughter that should have been with you. 

And you wept. 

hello loves, as always - thank you for reading. comment your thoughts or find me on ao3. stay hydrated and have a great day! taglist (let me know if you want to be added/removed):@imherefordeanandbones, @theywhowriteandknowthings, @josephquinnswhore, @millerscoffee, @nostalxgic, @sscorpiiio, @pedrosaidsheispunk, @its-nebuleuse, @sofiparallel,@bastardmandennis, @breakfastatjoels(sorry bc forgot to tag u in the last one) dividers by me! series taglist (message/comment to be added): @spookyxsam, @obscurexsorrows, @planet-marz1, @lunxramour, @anavatazes, @joeldjarin, @stunkbiggu, @joels-darlin, @casa-boiardi, @noisynightmarepoetry, @chiogarza, @jasminedragoon, @daddy-din, @moonlightdivine, @stickthegremlin, @mandoisapunk

[athanmis]

ROUND ONE❤️💛💚 third life

DogWarts (etho, skizz, bigb, martyn, ren)

Flower Husbands, Joel™️, Desert Duo

(jimmy, scott, joel, scar, grian)

Crastle Alliance

stay tuned😉

LAST LIFE💚💚💚💚

DOUBLE LIFE💚💚💛💛❤️❤️

LIMITEDLIFE⏳⌛️♥️

SECRETLIFE❤️‍🔥📕📙📗