#however for some reason i am literally the worst at finding Items

[trashpremiium]

hmghmghgmhgmhfm why am i so bad at gift-giving

[moonsluvr]

— accomplice?!

synopsis: beomgyu keeps stealing from the place you work at, and you let him get away with it (because obviously, it’s beomgyu).

pairing: thief!beomgyu x gn!reader

word count: 1.2k

genre: mostly fluff, strangers to ??

warnings: kinda mean boss, a lot of stealing

authors note: uhh this is a very old fic i changed to gyu but anywho!

beomgyu loves stealing. he likes the thrill, he likes “getting back” at people he thinks deserves it, and he loves stealing with you.

but when you first met him, he was stealing from you. confidently walking into the place you work at, and smiling at you on his way out with both hands full of things he definitely didn’t pay for. you didn’t rat him out. (you can let a face like that get away with a few crimes).

your boss, however, was not particularly a fan of the missing items, or whoever was behind it. the more you let him get away with, the more trouble you would find yourself in. it always happened during your shift, after all. your boss always reprimanded you for the thefts, even though you tried to explain that you didn’t know who the stealer was or how he was getting away with it. it was a lie, of course, but you still thought your boss was cruel for his harsh words and actions towards you.

“you should probably stop coming here. my boss literally wants you dead at this point.”

he looks at you with his pretty smile, “why don’t you steal back from me?”

you raise an eyebrow at him, but he just winks, walking out the sliding doors. you sigh, getting ready for another scolding at your next shift. and your boss does not go easy on you. so the next time, you make up your mind, you would steal back.

he comes back a week later, making his usual visit. but this time you’re watching him closely, waiting for an opportunity to snatch something of his. you settle on the bracelet hanging around his wrist. you weren’t sure how you were going to do it, though. stealing was new to you.

you see your chance as he walks up near the counter, ready to not pay, while you prepare yourself to go through with the plan you failed to make. he slightly leans forward, and you grab his arm before pulling at the bracelet. not exactly as subtle as you had hoped to be, but he was never subtle either. you considered it fair.

for some reason, he doesn’t fight back. he’d probably stolen it from somebody else, anyways. once you hand him his wrist back, he laughs and looks down at his bracelet in your hands now.

“well, you stole it fair and square! you can keep it now.”

“no.”

“what do you mean no?”

“i don’t want your bracelet.”

“why’d you take it from me, then?”

“bribery. stop stealing from here, and i’ll give it back.”

“fine.”

“fine? really? you’ll stop stealing?”

“no, of course not. ‘fine’ you can keep it. there’s no way i’m going to stop stealing from here.”

you frown at him, not wanting to get scolded for the rest of your life here, “why not?”

“your boss stinks.”

“i know,” you quickly agree, “he’s the worst.”

“and,” he starts, “i like seeing you.”

“seeing me?! you keep getting me in trouble with my boss, you know?” you frown, slightly scolding him for all the problems he’s caused for you.

“sorry about that. but if your boss keeps yelling at you for ‘disappearing’ items, why don’t you get something out of it? steal something for yourself. i’ll take the blame for it.”

you face him with an exasperated expression, “i’ll still be the one having to face him, though… how is he supposed to scold the thief if he doesn’t know who it is?”

“okay! don’t steal then. see you next week!” you roll your eyes at him as he walks out. and then you pick up a pack of gummy worms lying on a shelf behind you. and everyday after that, it becomes a habit of yours to steal from your own job.

“so, you started stealing too?”

“what else am i supposed to do?” you slump over the counter. he smiles. you notice he’s been stealing less and less from you.

it was a few weeks later when beomgyu decided to stop stealing from you, but he didn’t stop visiting. instead, he drops off little snacks from other places he’s stolen from.

“you should quit already. just join me.” he proposed simply.

and a few more weeks after that, you joined him in his mini-heists. when he finally convinced you to quit your job, you felt elated. you were finally free from your wretched boss. and you were free to cause trouble with beomgyu all you want.

that’s how you became his partner-in-crime. and that’s how you ended up at the same place you used to dread, but you were here with excitement now. you were here to steal from your annoying boss.

you walk in to see a new worker behind the desk. he greets you brightly with a, “hey! what can i do for you today?”

“do you have any gummy worms?” you smile back, “those are good.”

“i know! sometimes i like to eat some during my shifts. not without paying, of course!” he quickly defends himself. you smile to yourself knowing you’re in no place to judge. you happily pick up the gummy worms he hands you and start heading away from the cashier.

you walk deeper into the store to look for beomgyu, and he already has a shopping cart full of useless things. you pick up a toy robot from the cart.

“do you like my haul?”

you place the robot back on the shelves, “let’s only take what we’ll actually use.”

“what’s the point of stealing, anyways?” he sighs, but continues to place the excessive candy that he doesn’t even like back. the both of you continue to pick up some food or other things you deem important.

bagging your haul, you’re about to walk out, when your ex-boss walks in, and sees you and beomgyu.

“what are you doing here?” he asks you.

you look at the cashier with an apologetic look, while beomgyu grabs your hand.

“stealing!” you yell, getting ready to run away.

beomgyu drags the two of you out of the door as the both of you run away from your furious ex-boss. the adrenaline leads you two quite far away before you both start panting, falling to the pavement to give your legs a break.

suddenly, you start laughing, “his face!” you can barely talk, most of your oxygen being used up laughing, “we should’ve stolen more! imagine him walking into a clean store. nothing on his precious shelves..” you take a pause to breathe.

“the robot was perfect to steal” he sticks his tongue out at you.

you surrender, “okay, my bad. we should’ve taken everything on your cart.”

the conversation dies at that. the two of you look up at the bright sky.

although beomgyu failed in his plan to ask you out with the candy and silly toy robot that says, “i love you” with the press of a button, he smiles with you. he thinks watching you smile like this is enough to keep him going for now. next time he’d follow through with his plan for sure.

reminder that you are loved, appreciated, and cared for. i’m always here for all of you whenever you need, and i’m 100% a safe space. take care of yourself, love <3

TAGLIST: @giyyuzz @zederaya @levisrealrealwaifu @jakeyuni @beibybtch @vbxrin @soobin-chois @pinkheadflowers

[dimensionwriter]

Flufftober Day 3: College

M!Naga x GN! Reader

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I’m so bad at doing these daily. Ughhhhhhhh. Also Happy Indigenous People Day!!!!!!

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One day. One singular day is all that you are asking. Like, what idiot think it’s okay to be blasting music at 3 am. Especially during the time of exams. No one with a brain cell would be that cruel. 

Except you next door neighbor. Every time he got home around 6, music would turn on at max volume and won’t turn off until 6 am. You didn’t know if he fell asleep to the music, but that’s the reason humans invented headphones for. Does he not know what headphones are?

“So, you go to the third derivate of the equation to get-” You couldn’t think. You couldn’t even hear yourself speak out loud to replace thinking. You can’t do this. He just need to turn the music off. 

Quickly stepping away from your desk, you walked towards you front door with  determination flowing through your blood. The door was instantly open up allowing you to walk 3 steps over to your neighbor. 

Now, how shall you handle this? You can be civil and calm. Explain to him your situation and how his loud music is negatively impacting your studies. Then he will understand and turn his music off, leaving you to a quiet working space. 

“Hey, Charles! Open up!” You yelled banging on the door. See, the first option would have worked if your neighbor was a decent human being. You swore this man had to be a demon hiding in a human skin or something. 

Your first time meeting him was when you were moving in. Coming up the stairs, you accidently tripped on a crack in one of the steps, causing you to drop you box full of your school supplies. Everything spilled everywhere down the hallway. 

Then Satan himself appeared behind you, staring down at you. He had a nice dark brown skin with curly light brown hair. His eyes were the most notable feature. You assumed he had green eyes, but they are so light that they look golden.

You expected him to help you up or maybe start help picking up things, you know, like a decent human  being capable of empathy. “Always making a mess where you go. Disgusting,” he spit out, with a deep frown on his face. He stepped around your body still on the floor to walk down the hallway before stopping at the door next to yours. “At least be useful and pick up your mess.”

The interactions after that were all downhill. You would ask him for help considering he went to the same college at you and he would pretend not to hear you and walk away. You would politely ask if you could borrow some eggs or sugar to make a cake and his response was "Get it yourself."

So that's why you don't feel a miniscule of remorse for banging on his door. In fact, you felt a smidge of giddiness at seeing him crack the door open with bloodshot eyes. You were right in assuming he feel asleep.

"I know your brain is smooth all around. But you have to be capable of forming a coherent thought to not bang on doors early in the fucking morning." It's ironic that he says this when you can literally feel the bass from his music still. "Do you even comprehend that it's midterm or have you just been dozing off in class?"

Every ounce of your strength was put into stopping yourself from punching him in the face. Was he serious? He thinks you're being the rude one during this time. He's the one playing a full heavy metal concert in his apartment.

"Charles, you are the worst human being ," you ignored his scoff there," I have ever had the dishonor of meeting. However, I'm too tired to argue with you right now. I just ask one thing. Please turn the music off or just down so I can't hear."

You stated deep into his light green eyes to show him that you were being serious. You watched as his nose scrunched up in confusion at your statement.

"What music could you possibly be talking about?" He asked, as the bass dropped once again causing the floor to vibrate. You didn't even say anything but pointed in front of him. You couldn't see into his home because of the door still half shut on him, but you hoped he got the hint.

A hand appeared from behind the door and reached into his hair. After digging around for a few seconds, he shoved the hair to the side revealing his ear. Was his ears always that pointy?

He reached into it and his fingers seem to grab something causing him to pull at it. A blue cylindrical item came out and landed in his hand. The two of you stated down at it before slowly looking up at each other.

Did he- did he really put in ear plugs in... to not hear his loud music?

"Whoops, I'll guess I could turn it down," he said sliding behind the door. You stood there in disbelief as you realized that only you were suffering from the music for the last couple of days.

"Charles, what the-" you yelled grabbing the handle of the door to swing it open. You took a step forward, finally gaining that energy to yell at him, when your eyes took in your next door neighbor.

His dark brown chest was on display, but that was not the main focal point. As it go lower, instead of a pair of pants, there's golden specks in the sides. Then more specks until they bunch up into scales.

His lower half was snake body with golden scales. A few of them were extremely dull with what looked to be dead skin sticking out everywhere. 

You brought your gaze up from the unnatural sight that definitely burned into your eyes to look at Charles’s face. His face was completely blank as you made eye contact. You both looked down at his tail, then back up  at each other, then back down at each other, before finally stopping on each other’s face. 

“You know- I gotta...I gotta go,” you stuttered out, slowly walking backwards. His eyes, which you were hundred percent sure now were golden, started to turn into slits. 

You turned around to go run, but something wrapped around you waist before yanking you back. Something cold and rough was wrapped around your mouth before pulling you into something solid. 

“Stupid human. Stupid human. Stupid human. You- you better not make a sound. I can- I can eat you.. yeah... I’m a big scary monster that could gobble you up, so you better do what I say.” All the fear you held melted away as you could feel Charles shaking around you. You could feel the way he was panicking from the way his breath was quickly hitting the back of your neck. 

Wiggling your left hand, you managed to get it out of his coils. You grabbed his forearm and started to pull down to speak, but he just tighten his grip. “You stupid human. I was trying so hard to keep you away, so this wouldn’t happen. But you had to be so- so...”

You managed to pull his arm off. “Stupid might be the word you’re looking for.” Tilting your head back, you looked into his yellow eyes to see his pupil was as thin as a needle. 

“Also, I’m not going to scream. Out of the two of us, you seem most likely to scream,” you teasing, wiggling some more. Your right arm popped out. “Also, you might want to close the door before you have to deal with someone else finds out that you’re a snake.”

All the pressure around disappear as you saw Charles quickly slither over to the door. It was slammed shut with all the locks being clicked into place. Charles glanced at the door before grabbing a nearby chair and sliding it under the door. 

“So,” he turned around to look at you with a slight glare,” I guess you got some explaining to do.”

=====================

I apologize for making this into a two parter, but some stuff happen that caused me to not finish it. But this will get fluffier in part two. Nothing but fluff. You could call it cotton candy. 

[whyamiherewhosummonedme]

It's analysis time motherfuckers, because that conversation with Dream in front of the Nether Portal was INTERESTING.

So, Technoblade owes Dream a favor. We all knew that this fact would be important, and it's shaping up to be even MORE important than we thought. Let's talk about some of the most important things that could be understood from that little conversation, shall we?

First, Techno bringing up the favor in the first place, sounding very excited. This can be taken in two possible ways. One (and probably the more likely explanation) is that Technoblade the minecraft youtuber and ex-english major is extremely excited for whatever is planned to happen when that favor gets called in, and wanted to remind the audience (and Tommy) that it's a thing, which is worrying all on its own because Technoblade likes greek mythology and greek mythology is not kind. The other explanation is that Technoblade, the anarchist pigman in a world full of government, is sick and tired of Tommy constantly messing up his plans (being the opposite of stealthy when sneaking into L'manberg, dragging random violent llamas around while trying to do a mission, stealing and wasting some of the most valuable objects he has such as slowfalling potions and gapples) and wants him gone. He was excited to bring up the idea of betraying Tommy with the excuse of a favor, because it would rid him of a loud, annoying, useless thorn in his side. Remember, SBI isn't a family to Techno. Tommy isn't really a brother. Just some random kid who used him, threw him to the side after his usefulness was complete, then came running back and demanding his aid once again when he finally was forced to face some consequences. It would be a blessing for Dream to get rid of him for Techno. The pig may be manipulating him like the god before him and the musician before him, but he isn't really getting anything out of it.

Second, Dream's response. He hesitated, mulling over whether or not to do what Techno said and cash in his favor right then and there. Either he did that and brought Tommy under his grasp once more, or he saved it for later, likely to be used during or after whatever he's planning that will make everyone hate him. However, Tommy has come to realize that Dream was manipulating him, even if he hasn't really seemed to come to terms with it fully. He told Dream to his face that he was a manipulator and told the most powerful man on the server, literally God, to go fuck himself. I imagine that Dream realized that there was no way to bring Tommy back to heel - he'd gone too far in the opposite direction, intentionally not taking a damn thing seriously and being the biggest asshole he could possibly be. It would be far too much work to make this child obedient again, if he could do so at all - no, the plan had to be changed. The same trick wouldn't work twice, at least not from the same man. So, he decided to keep that favor for later, pulling on one of his backup plans. And if there's one thing Dream has shown, it's that he's never, ever unprepared. I always think back to the behind the scenes videos on Punz's channel of the Revolutionary War, and how Dream prepared for the absolute worst-case scenario and set up three separate backup plans in case something happened that he hadn't expected, none of which even needed to be used. If that's what his planning skills were like back then... Then what the hell kind of ludicrous backup plans does he have NOW?

Third, the Disc. Dream said that he got Tommy's disc Cat back from Skeppy, who's had it longer than Tommy ever did by now. This wouldn't seem to be much of something to think about, except that the last time we saw Skeppy, he'd been infected by the Crimson. He had the disc at that point, even going so far as to toss it around and threaten to burn it. And the thing is, Skeppy has not been cured. Dream didn't get the disc from Skeppy, he got it from Red Skeppy, who has declared that his only desire is for the Crimson to grow and prosper. He doesn't even care about Bad kissing other people in front of him, and burned 14 wholeass diamond blocks because he didn't care about them. How, exactly, did Dream negotiate with him? What could he have given Red Skeppy to convince him to give up Cat? And how will this affect the Crimson arc, which has been confirmed to be important to the main plotline?

And fourth, a smaller thing that still caught my interest: Dream protesting over his supposed homelessness. Now, I firmly believe that Dream is telling the truth that he does, in fact, have a base - there is no fucking way that he carries everything on him, not when he apparently has so much stuff to throw around, and also as he evidently has at least a Piglin trading farm (he gave Sam 5 or 6 stacks of enderpearls after he asked for them for the Vault construction, all the obsidian for the New L'manberg Walls, and him making it clear that he wanted to play everything legitimately in Survival Mode), likely with other farms hidden around the server (the Trident farm that he tore down after showing where it was, and the villager trading hall that Punz found under his base while cleaning out Blood Vines). There's absolutely no way that he doesn't have a hidden base, even if just to hold all his items. The only reason that he doesn't show it to Technoblade to prove that he does, in fact, have a house is because wants to keep it actually hidden, since his last hidden base was griefed constantly the moment it was found. However, while protesting and saying that he does have a base tp Techno, he stopped himself in the middle of yelling and said "you'll see, you'll see" in a much softer tone. This makes me, personally, believe that that hidden base is indeed going to be a plot point in the future, or at the very least it'll be found and explored. This then makes me wonder about what Dream hinted at before, with him having to run away after he does something that will make the entire server hate him. Will he be chased after when he runs? Will there finally be a manhunt on the SMP run by someone who grew popular for his manhunts? And if there is, will they find Dream inside of his base, or will they find it abandoned, or is it well-hidden enough that they will never find it at all, and he'll explicitly show it to someone when the time comes for a grand reveal of whatever's hidden in there? I don't know, but I look forward to whatever the plan is!

Basically, while the lore stuff was relatively short, I'm a Dream apologist and am constantly reading too much into things to try and figure out what the hell is planned in the future. No matter what, we can be certain that things will come to a head in two days. Let's watch these fireworks, shall we?

[putschki1969]

Hi Puts, I have a question, but maybe it's too personal. As a fan, how much money do you spend? I think the three FC alone cost about $130 a year. Each shipment to Mexico costs between $20 and $50, including fees. Buying CDs, DVDs, streaming tickets, shop items, magazines (Idk if Hikaru and Keiko send something like Botanical Tsushin) I think is quite a bit of money. I graduated this year and recently started working, so I'm wondering how much money I need to pay for everything I want.

Hello there!

Don't worry, I have no filter so there is literally nothing too personal you could ever ask me. Also, I think it's important to be transparent about stuff like that.

Before I get to the juicy details I want to preface this post by saying that I am in a very privileged position so using my fangirl expenses as a general reference is probably not the best idea. There is free education and public health care in my country so I do not have any debts from either of those. On top of that I do have a job with a decent salary and my monthly fixed costs are comparatively low since I share the rent and stuff with my mum (yup, I am 30+ and choose to live with my mum, sue me). My company pays for public transportation, internet and a big portion of my meals. Last but not least, I have no car, no partner, no kids, no pets, no other social commitments or anything else that would burden me financially aside from my obsession with Kalafina so I am free to spend a considerable amount of my income on my "hobby" without having to worry too much about running into debt or not having enough savings.

Having said that, I will openly admit that I spend a SHIT-TON of money for my girls, much more than I am honestly comfortable with. Yes, I can more or less afford it but it still brings me a lot of pain and tears every single day.

Now let's get into the details 〈(•ˇ‿ˇ•)-→ [Like you I will be using USD for easy understanding]

I honestly cannot tell you a definitive number since my expenses always change depending on how many events and releases are scheduled for a particular time period. I guess I can provide a rough overview of what I am currently spending on Kalafina since there are quite a few things happening right now (nothing compared to last December though).

The four FCs I am part of with their combined costs of roughly $150 are what I consider to be “negligible costs” and they are really my least concern in the grand scheme of things.

The streaming tickets are very cheap in my opinion and I would gladly pay even more for them if it meant I wouldn't have to spend a fortune on regular trips to Japan. But yeah, it's another $150 to $200 a year for various streaming events.

Releases and merch are pricey in and of themselves (incl. around $5-$10 of domestic shipping) but it's made even worse when you are crazy like me and buy multiple copies of something just to get special benefits. Recently I have ordered Hikaru's merch (~$100), Keiko's merch (~$50), Wakana's merch (~$120) and three *coughs* copies of Wakana's Blu-ray (~$220). I also made sure to purchase Hikaru's albums on iTunes (~$20) even though I already own the CDs.

International shipping/import fees is where the costs pile up and I usually end up paying anywhere from $20 up to $150 for packages. Austria has literally the WORST import regulations T_T

I also indulge in the occasional Kalafina fashion item so that gets pretty expensive too. But that’s just me so there is really no need to take these costs into consideration.

So yeah, you can expect to spend a LOT of money depending on how greedy you are. :P Being an overseas Kalafina-fan sucks! However, I have two tips for you:

Prioritising is key! Find out what’s most important to you and then make peace with the fact that you will never be able to buy everything because that’s just not reasonable (unless you are filthy rich :P). I obviously focus on digital and physical music releases because that’s how you support their solo careers. I know it’s tempting to pirate this stuff but I urge all fans to make those purchases. The same applies to live stream tickets. If you have the means and the event is foreigner-friendly, please go for it! Aside from that, you will just have to choose your orders wisely. Ask yourself the questions: What kind of benefits do I prefer? What merch am I most likely to use? Any merch I am particularly fond of? Make sure you don’t end up overspending. While I keep encouraging fans to spend their money, you should always do it within reason. 

Cluster your orders! If you are using a proxy service like Tenso or Buyee, it’s best to have items arrive around the same time so you can consolidate your packages (within the 30-day period). After all, there is nothing more frustrating than paying $20 on shipping for a tiny fan club magazine that’s basically for free. So before you make a purchase, check the scheduled shipping time and try to make your orders align with each other. And also try to pay attention to the shipping dates of FC-related items, that’s not always easy since the schedules aren’t exactly regular but you can at least get a feel for them. If a FC item happens to arrive at the warehouse, you could always use that opportunity to order some in-stock goods or releases you have had your eye on. They should arrive quickly so you can ship them together with the FC-item. Please note that this will of course increase shipping costs/import fees since your packages will get bigger/heavier but I think at the end of the day, you are still saving money.

I know it’s often frustrating and intimidating to navigate through the world of Kalafina but I hope my posts can at least somehow help to alleviate the the stress that comes with being an overseas fan.

[cursebreaker-lilith]

vague thoughts on the cursed vaults and their lore in my version

below the cut bc there’s some spoilers for my rewrite

ok so maybe i did write three whole stories before sitting down and figuring out my lore and stuff for the vaults don’t @ me

anyways, some thoughts:

the cursed vaults have a sort of domino effect going on. once you open one, the next will automatically open when the first is closed and so on until they’re all closed... or whoever is opening them fails. 

failing means they die or they get trapped in a vault.

(which is only occasionally a death sentence. usually it is bc you’re trapped in a sealed room without food or water, but it is possible to survive the portrait vault. if you get caught there you don’t age or need any food... until you get out. when you get out, you age rapidly to the age you would have been and all your years long needs come back to you. Jacob was lucky he was only there for a few years.)

so the curses that started with Jacob ended when he was trapped in the portrait vault.

the glowing pillar things used to hold items, either treasures or clues, but the original items are long gone by Jacob and Lili’s time. people who had gone into the vaults before took them.

when Jacob was looking, there was nothing in them, but when messing around he noticed that if you put something in it, it would float and stay there which later would give him an idea.

after Duncan died, Jacob gathered some items and gave them to Olivia. she was meant to go into the first three vaults (harmless at that point because the curse of the fourth vault was still ongoing so their respective curses couldn’t activate) and put the items in there.

Jacob knew that if he didn’t manage to get through the portrait vault in time, then R would discard him and pick some other child to open them. he wanted to give whoever came after him some clues to help guide them.

and it would be a child. he knew that.

i’m not sure of the exact reasoning why yet, but I’m thinking that the vaults will only open for people under a certain age. 18? children and teenagers basically. so R uses them to do what they want.

either some kid finds out about the vaults on their own and R manipulates them into doing their bidding, or they raise a child to be obsessed with the Vaults and have them look for them while they’re at hogwarts.

(the second option is what I think I’m going to do with Merula. She was meant to be their next puppet after Jacob but turned out to not be that great at searching for them and R eventually gave up on her in favor of manipulating Lili. another reason why she has a grudge against Lili and why she eventually turns from R.)

(Rakepick in my hc only found out about the vaults as an older teen. she never went into a vault while at hogwarts and by the time R found her, she was already too old to be useful, so they recruited her instead. that’s what they do with older teens since they won’t be useful in actively looking for the vaults.)

the age thing is also why Dumbledore isn’t doing more to help them--he can’t. if he got involved more then the vaults would retaliate violently and he does want to keep the students safe, so he stays out of the way.

(he would probably would be more up front about this bc its not knowledge that needs to be hidden, but Lili hates him and mistrusts anything he says so he doesn’t say anything. he did, however, help Jacob more. in my hc, Duncan’s death was never released to the news or connected to Jacob and its bc of Dumbledore doing some meddling. he also was the one who taught Jacob legillimancy bc Snape reaaaally hated Jacob and the two of them definitely had many talks during those lessons.)

(sorry not sorry to some people but i am not one of those people whos convinced Dumbledore is The Worst Person In Existence. Lili is but i’m not lol)

that’s what R used Ben for. they Imperio’d him to try to get around the age thing, but it didn’t work. no matter what they tried, the vault wouldn’t open and eventually actively retaliated, which is how Ben got caught in the cursed ice. they eventually just gave up and left him for dead.

so yea. R knows the locations of the first 3 vaults and try to steer the kids in that direction. but as vaguely as possible bc the vault is like hogwarts--its such old magic that its sort of semi sentient and knows when humans are trying to manipulate it for their own gain.

(I think Merula opened the vault in first year, but didn’t have much success looking for it after. she was given some knowledge by R in 2nd year too, but when Lili was the one to go into the vault, R switched over to Lili being their main candidate in 3rd year.)

i think its usually when they get to the 4th vault that things get complicated.

even R doesn’t know the exact location and has to rely on a student finding it for them. the only thing they know is that it’s underground near or literally under Hogsmeade. that’s why people can apparate out of the vault.

usually, vault 4 is where people die or get trapped. either they die facing the dragon, can’t do legillimancy and get trapped in the antechamber and then killed by the dragon, or they get in and touch a portrait and get trapped in it. maybe a few people have made it out, but not many

no one in recorded history has ever made out alive from the 5th and final vault

...yea. that’s it for now.

some things I still need to figure out:

who and what R exactly are

why the vaults were created

what the treasure is at the end (did the games ever say? idk i’ll make my own thing i guess if they don’t reveal it soon. bc according to the old head writer one of the first things they did was decide what was in the last vault, but like. who knows if they’re going to still follow the old plot ahahaha)

[thecaptainhelm]

Good Love

ch.2 is here, it’s technically an interlude, which is bad bc it’s so early. i never claimed to be good at this, so here’s Alfred being worried for almost two thousand words

Enjoy!

That day, it was one of the rare, bright mornings in Gotham, where the sky was overcast but the sun managed to shine through, sending dappled sunlight into the eastern wing of Wayne Manor. Alfred Pennyworth had been up before sunrise as he had been for decades, carrying out his more mundane tasks in service to the Waynes, though it would have been preferred that they learned to rely on him for other things.

Normally he wouldn’t complain quite so much, the stress from it was cumbersome in his old age, but the situation had been truly aggravating this past month.

The youngest master of the house had begun acting...strange. Strange in a way that genuinely worried both himself and Bruce. Damian was by no means the best at communication, but he did at least check in from time to time, and they saw him for when they needed extra hands on deck for their ‘night shift’ as they’d begun to call it.

He didn’t contact anyone for an entire week, dropping off radar, and the only reason anyone knew was that Dr. Norfey had left a message with his emergency contacts, asking him to set up a date to reschedule his bi-monthly appointments.

Everyone called Damian in a rush, and he said he was fine, but it was strange because Damian never did anything without a reason, ever. He was literally raised to make carefully planned decisions, and that idea was only reinforced under their care. They’d had to find out because he missed his therapy session as if he didn’t worry Alfred enough.

For the past three years, he had been in the care of a reputable therapist, competent, and more importantly, safe for Damian. They specialized in mentally and emotionally abused patients and unearthing childhood trauma. The success rate of Dr. Norfey was slightly above average, as most patients either leave positive reviews or receive recommendations for more intensive help. After arguing for days on end with the entire family, he finally relented and scheduled a two-hour session. After that, he went about his routine as usual.

Nothing extreme had happened, thank God, but there did seem to be a positive response. He met with Dr. Norfey again after two weeks, glaring at anyone who would look too long, daring them to speak up. It wasn’t long before it became the new normal. The young master gradually lost his scowl for something gentler, appearing relaxed when home, though he went back to it as soon as he left the premises. Certainly, he had his good days and his bad days, but he seemed all the more certain of himself as an individual. Truly, he didn’t think Damian could make him anymore proud.

Then, he met a young lady.

Her name was Marinette Dupain-Cheng, a petite young woman with kind eyes and a bright smile set upon a youthful face. She was polite, witty, with no small amount of talent and charm, and an endless amount of patience for Alfred’s brood. She was a breath of fresh air, especially for the suffocated Damian.

An investigation into her profile revealed that she was a rising star of the cutthroat fashion realm, her resume boasting high-profile clientele and lucrative business contracts. She hadn’t had anything notorious to her name, no criminal record, no illegal transactions, almost normal to the point of suspicion. After a while though, they managed to dig up something insidious.

Marinette Dupain-Cheng had connections to a terrorist.

Six years prior, a supervillain appeared in Paris for the first time, holding the city, it’s citizens, and tourists hostage for what would be the better part of three years. During that period, Ms. Dupain-Cheng would then begin to date Adrien Agreste, and then break up with him a year later. She and her entire family disappeared soon after. A month later, Hawkmoth was arrested, along with his accomplice Mayura, and seventeen years old son, Adrien Agreste. It didn’t take a detective to figure out what happened.

Looking at the classified investigation reports uncovered more of the truth, that Gabriel had the idea to use the miraculous to revive his wife. He planned to sacrifice his son’s girlfriend, a girl his wife would never know about by using Adrien to make the wish. In the end, he never even got his hands on the miraculous. Marinette had started to become uncomfortable with Gabriel’s strange questions and talked to Ladybug and Chat Noir.

When she told them of what types of questions she was asked, they grew concerned and sent her and her family to a safe house outside of Paris. From there, with police assistance, evidence was gathered and a warrant was issued. Gabriel was confident until Supergirl arrived, using her x-ray vision on the property and revealing the hidden lair beneath the building. He was quickly apprehended without fuss, and it was case closed. Adrien had been arrested as well, but he was quickly acquitted when evidence showed that he wasn’t involved in any way.

After that was the media firestorm, and the Dupain-Chengs weren’t spared. However, Ms. Dupain-Cheng was skilled as she showed her hand, and it was a revolution. Out from the woodwork poured celebrity after celebrity, vouching for her and her family.

She managed to turn her pariah status into that of a martyr in the eyes of the public because that was the bible-sworn truth. She’d rose to the occasion and exceeded all expectations. After that, she faded from the media for two years before returning as a critically acclaimed designer.     The Bats gave her a grace period and soon they too began to gradually lower their guard.

And young master Damian appeared to be quite smitten as he decided to open his heart as well.

He watched his young master attempt to curry favor with the young lady, awkwardly wooing her to their family’s amusement. He saw her cautiously reciprocate, and he saw their tentative courtship, budding and fragile, blossom into something beautiful and delicate. He saw them weather the tough days and work hard for their relationship. He saw Damian start to let himself be happy without restraint. Soon a year had passed, then two, and then three. In the fourth year, master Bruce started to hint to Alfred to update the family registry, as joyful as he was.

So when he was sent word that Damian’s belongings would be shipped home, he hoped that Ms. Marinette would be there with him.  Perhaps misfortune had come to their apartment and most of the young lady’s things had to be sent to storage, but it wasn’t meant to be. The message he sent left no room for misunderstandings.

I’m sending my things back to the manor. I’ll be home by the end of the week.

The young master shall be returning alone, then.

Alfred had long since received the delivery and moved everything back to its original place, save for items that were acquired after he’d moved out. Now the day had come for Damian to arrive home. The moment was both exactly and not at all what he’d expected.

On an unusually sunny morning, about an hour before noon, the one and only Alfred Pennyworth opened the doors to the sight of the youngest master, Damian.

His appearance was neat, shoulders back, and posture straight as a rod. There was not a hair out of place. However, his eyes…

It had been a while since he’s seen his eyes look so strained, it was clear that he had not slept well. This was when he knew that Ms. Marinette would not be returning for a visit for some time

“Welcome back, Master Damian,” he said.

“Hello, Alfred.” A rigid nod. “I have returned.”

“So it appears,” he opened the doors and waved Damian in. “I have your favorite pot of tea on. Would you care for a cup in the dining room or the parlor?”

“Neither. I’ll have some, but I’d like to rest for a while.” Damian stepped gingerly through the door, as though he was indeed tired. Normally, he wouldn’t let such an obvious wound slide, but he knew better to pressure a man trapped in a corner.

“Very well, young master,” Alfred shut the door and turned to accompany Damian through the main hall, a step behind.

“You’ll find your belongings in your old bedroom with the facilities fully stocked, as per usual. Please be sure to take care of your wound and to reschedule your session with Dr. Norfey before tomorrow.”

“Yes, thank you, Alfred.” A pause. Damian had never been one for conversation, but he would usually ask what was going on in the manor without wasting time.

“As your father will be out late at the office along with your brothers, dinner will be held an hour earlier to accommodate their sudden absence.”

A noncommittal hum came from the young man in front of him and Alfred nearly furrowed his brow in worry.

All too soon they arrived and Damian turned back to the Wayne family butler, stoic.

“Thank you, Alfred,” he nodded slightly. “I’ll be out for dinner, but I am feeling a bit hungry after my drive. “

“Say no more,” Alfred gave him a placid smile. “I’ve already set out the tea and snacks on your desk. I shall return for the platter after you have finished.”

Damian finally let loose a tiny smirk. “Thank you, Alfred.”

“Of course, sir.” A courteous bow was the last Damian saw of the butler as he entered and closed the door to his room.

Alfred walked back towards the kitchen to check on his pot roast, feeling relieved. Damian wasn’t at his best, that much was evident, but that didn’t mean he was at his worst. At least not yet. However, there was still hope, because while it seemed like he had regressed in his current state, his tired eyes said that he had some sort of revelation.

Alfred began to prepare Damian’s portion, wondering what could have happened between the two for him to return alone, looking as though he would rather be anywhere else? The list of options was short but severe. He could have told her any number of secrets about his past, family history, current vigilante occupation, and while he had faith in Ms. Marinette, the young woman was by no means a saint.

It could have also been that she broke up with Damian, and it might be his extreme bias, but he couldn’t fathom why. Yes, this was Damian they were talking about, but he’d been in therapy for close to eight years now and was making steady progress as he continued to root out his trauma and slowly but surely heal. However, he did not know how their relationship was faring, as both proved to be rather private. Though, the young miss was more shy than possessive.

Damian had over ten years of trauma, all throughout his early childhood, and suddenly he was becoming an adult. A confused, depressed, and unstable child had become trapped in the body and mind of an adult, and while everyone helped to the best they could, all while trying to help themselves, it wasn’t enough. It never would be, not for this battle.

Alfred sighed, feeling his years. He pulled dinner out to rest and started to set the table, just in time for the proximity sensors to notify him of Bruce’s car pulling into the estate. Right on schedule.

“Welcome home Masters Bruce, Timothy, and Duke. If you would, hurry and wash before dinner. It’s been quite the long day, has it not?”

there, it’s gonna be a while for ch. 3

[jeanjauthor]

I was reading about mediveal horses in fantasy and how they’re unrealistic. And usually the horses were avarge. But isn’t a shire horse origin in 1066-Ish? Could that be used in a mediveal fantasy?

It could be, but you might want to do some research to know what those shire horses were actually used for, and what they weren’t.  Horses were not owned by everyone, and were not put to the plow for a long time.  Why not?  Because horses were more expensive than oxen.

An ox is nothing more than a castrated bull that’s been trained to pull a plow, a wagon, etc, and if you have cows for milk and dairy and beef, you’d want to keep most of the females, but not keep most of the males--not as bulls, because your cattle would be goring each other.  So any male cattle born would be assessed for qualities, and either kept for stud (only 1-2 on a farm, IF you have the room to keep a bull separate from the cows), slaughtered for beef, or castrated and trained to be a work animal.

Cows will drop a fairly equal ratio of the genders, but female cattle produce milk, making them valuable to keep around and keep fed.  Horses...well, Mongols might milk mares, but that really wasn’t an European thing, which is what a lot of fantasy (talking about the stuff written in English, here) is based upon.  And mares don’t produce nearly as much milk as cows do.  So economically, it makes more sense to keep cattle around and put them to work in the earlier medieval periods.

Shire horses are huge because they are meant for pulling plows and wagons (their solid hooves don’t break up the rows and the soil nearly as much as the split hooves of cattle).  They’re not usually trained to carry armored warriors into battle, etc.  Medievally, there were horses trained for specific tasks, like the smooth-gaited riding palfrey.  It was not a specific breed of horse, instead being picked for its temperament and trained in its movements.  While certain knights did have big destriers to ride...the majority of mounted warriors actually rode smaller horses, like rounceys and coursers.

And of course, the mule is often overlooked.  This hybrid between a donkey and a mare was the “workhorse” of medieval life, if it wasn’t oxen.  They could carry a lot more weight, were more intelligent, and ate less (or at least didn’t have to eat as much quality food in winter), making them inexpensive to keep.  There might have been mules trained for warfare, for scouting, and certainly for “blending in” when spying on a neighboring region.  Just go in as a trader or traveler with your packs on your mule, and people won’t think twice.

Additionally, you might want to research when stirrups were invented and used--Roman cavalry did not have stirrups, because while they were invented in BCE Asia, they didn’t reach Europe until some time after the collapse of the Roman Empire.

...As you can see, using a shire horse for something in your story in a way that your equestrian-knowledgeable readers won’t go “...wtf??” over can require a bit of educational effort.  Presuming this is a fantasy set in a created world and not an historical real-world setting, you can get away with many things...but if there’s one thing to take away from all of this, understand that shire horses are BIG, and will need to EAT.  Lotta pounds on that thar horse!

And they’re not a bicycle.  Your character cannot just get off their steed and go inside a house for the night.  That horse must be given water, and a rubdown, the saddle needs to be removed to prevent galling and sores and scarring from those saddle sores, they need to have adequate food of the right quality--shire horses are big, so they need a lot of calories, but you cannot give a horse nothing but grain, however high-calorie that feed may be.  They need fiber from grasses and hay--they do not eat straw, which is calorically and nutritionally deficient!--they may even need tree browse (yes, horses and cattle will eat leaves, not just grasses), and sometimes you’ll want to feed them fruit, but not always.

Also, sugar cubes are very much an Industrial Revolution thing, because the cubes are made via complex machinery.  Sugar lumps are what you’d serve medievally...but you’d probably not give pure sugar to a horse, because sugar is expensive in a medieval setting.  Honey drizzled over dried fruit slices would be a more likely treat, and you’d certainly feed your horse (or donkey, mule, etc) the core from your apple or your pear.

Additionally, horses are herd animals.  They need companions around them or they become distressed from anxiety and nervousness, not having other sets of eyes and ears to help watch out for danger.  This doesn’t have to be another horse...though it should be, on a farm.  There are companion animals that are goats and mules and donkeys, and I’ve even heard of dogs and cats--yes, housecats, or more properly, barncats--being companion animals to horses.

Consider your characters’ socio-economic backgrounds before assigning them a shire horse, make sure they treat that horse as a living being in need of care and not like a bicycle that can be easily set aside and forgotten about, and decide if what you need is a really big horse (because sometimes you do!) or if something smaller or faster or whatever might serve your story better.

And lastly, horses cannot gallop for more than a few minutes.  Galloping is sprinting.  Not even Usain Bolt can sprint for more than a few minutes!  Cantering is also not something that can be maintained 24/7, or even for an entire hour.  Horses need to be ridden at the walk, the amble, and/or the trot as much or more often as at the canter, especially when burdened with armor, gear, rider, etc.

Humans can out-distance horses over the long run.

We are pursuit predators.  While horses and dogs can outrun us in a sprint, we can literally walk other animals to death.  Wolves can almost keep up with a reasonably fit human who is used to walking everywhere (which is your basic medieval traveler)...but even though wolves are pros at long-distance travel, they still have to stop and rest more frequently, and horses far more frequently still.  Horses give us the advantage of short bursts of higher speed, and the ability to carry or (even better yet) pull far more weight in supplies, etc, than we can haul ourselves...but they cannot run forever.

If your human has enough of a head start that can negate the sprinting capacity of a horse, and if there is enough underbrush to just barely admit a human to pass through it, but not a horse, a human on foot can escape from mounted people pursuing them.

...All of this is just scratching the surface of writing realistic horses in fantasy, and I am not an expert by any means.  (I have, however, listened to many, and done my own research.)  So...go chat with equestrians, ask them questions, look up resources online, and ask yourself some questions. 

How would this character have/afford a shire horse?  How would they train this horse?  What uses would they have for this horse? How do they take care of the horse?  What equipment do they carry for taking care of the horse, riding, etc?  What companion animals does the horse get to have? What are their plans for recovering the horse if it spooks and runs off?  How much does the horse consider the character a friend and/or herd-member?

Yes, you could ignore all these questions and just have the horse around when it’s convenient and vanish it when it’s inconvenient...but unless it’s like an enchanted bridle or a brooch, a ring, a summoning statuette, whatever, imbued with the spirit of a faithful steed (fantasy writing is great for this stuff)...you’re going to need to thing about these sorts of things if you want to have your horses in your fantasy setting be realistic enough that the equestrian community won’t *facepalm heavysigh* any time they read a scene in your story with an equine.

The “enchanted bridle” thing is how I pretend my characters in World of Warcraft don’t have to worry about actually housing, feeding, etc, their steeds, and it’s how they can ride or fly all day without tiring because it’s not a living being, it’s an enchantment full of magic.  BUT, if you’re going to go this route because it’s easier...you’ll still need to consider, how did your character acquire this enchanted object?  How could they afford it? Did they make it themselves? Or did they find it, or steal it?  How is it powered?  Does it have a limit to how much it can be used in a day, or summoned and dismissed and resummoned?  Does it require a set period of waiting time between being dismissed and being resummoned? 

Is there a chance of this enchanted item breaking?  Remember, it doesn’t have to break at the worst moment in the story; it could break earlier, when they have time to fix or replace it...but do they have the resources to fix or replace it?  Not just in terms of buying or craft, but, are enchanted bridles or horse statuettes common in that region?  For that matter, if they’re not common, is it going to cause confusion to people when they go around or into a building for a few moments, only to come back to see absolutely zero horse anywhere, because while they were gone you dismounted and dismissed the enchantment?

...Okay, okay, I’ve gone on long enough!  You can see how this one topic can quickly get out of hand.  And again, I am not an expert on equestrians in stories.  But if you do a bit of research and keep some realism in mind...you can write realistic scenes involving horses, shire style or otherwise.

[caramelpoppcorn]

BNHA/MHA season 3 volume 3 Drama CD

Cast: Iida Tenya, Todoroki Shoto, Yaoyorozu Momo

INTRO

IIDA: (00:00) Bakugou was kidnapped by the League of Villains and to rescue him, I, Iida Tenya, along with Midoriya, Kirishima, Todoroki and Yaoyorozu, have reached the Kamino district, thanks to Yaoyorozu's detection device. However, we are in a very lively district at night, and people would notice us if they see five teenagers walking. In the worst case, we might even be taken to the police station. Due to these reasons, we decided to go shopping for costumes at the nearby Don Quixote department store.

INTO THE DRAMA

IIDA: (00:42) So, this is the rumored "extremely cheap" discount store, the “Super Cheap Don Quixote”!

TODOROKI: (00:48) Iida, have you been here before?

IIDA: (00:50) No, and you?

TODOROKI: (00:52) No.

YAOYOROZU: (00:53) I have not been here either! Well, let's go into the super cheap Don Quixote department store!

TODOROKI: (00:58) Yaoyorozu, aren't you too excited about this? / Why are you too excited about this?

YAOYOROZU: (01:00) W-no way! What do you mean? This is the first time I've ever experienced something like this, so…

IIDA: (01:06) What?! What?! Look at the volume and sizes of all these products!

TODOROKI: (01:12) There are too many lines. Each row is so crowded that only one person can go through it at a time.

IIDA: (01:17) There are even products up to the ceiling! How could a client get such a high item? Do they even intend to sell these?

TODOROKI: (01:22) Probably not.

YAOYOROZU: (01:25) I heard from Ashido-san that there are kinds of stores that have so many interesting items to look at, and anything that you may be looking for!

TODOROKI: (01:34) What does that mean?

YAOYOROZU: (01:35) To put it simply, it's like playing while shopping!

TODOROKI: (01:39) That sounds annoying / such a drag.

YAOYOROZU: (01:40) As expected of Kirishima and Midoriya, they are able to walk easily through these narrow hallways!

TODOROKI: (01:45) They must be used to these kinds of places.

IIDA: (01:46) T-Todoroki-kun!

TODOROKI: (01:47) What’s the matter, Iida?

IIDA: (01:50) Just look! This 100% real, preservative-free orange juice that I always drink is only 900 yen for six 2-liter bottles! If you calculate it, each liter is only 150 yen each! What kind of price is this?! The catchy phrase of this slogan "Super Cheap" is really true. It is so cheap! I just have to buy it right here and now!

TODOROKI: (02:09) Iida, do you intend to rescue Bakugou while you have 12-liter bottles with you?

IIDA: (02:15) Ah… You are right! I'm sorry. I was distracted by the price of these items!

However, next time I come to this store, I will definitely buy this juice! Don Quixote, Kamino branch... I will remember you!

YAOYOROZU: (02:34) Iida, Todoroki, it seems that the first floor is all food products?

TODOROKI: (02:38) Hey, Kirishima and Midoriya went up the escalators just now.

IIDA: (02:43) If we look at the direction of the floor, the clothes are on the 4th floor! Okay, let's go to the 4th floor!

YAOYOROZU: (02:47) since we're already here, we might as well take a look at floors 2 and 3 too!

TODOROKI: (02:51) Seriously?

YAOYOROZU: (02:52) Ah ... well uh ... maybe we can find things that could help us!

IIDA: (02:58) Oh that makes sense! Let's go through each floor one by one then!

TIME SKIP

TODOROKI: (03:04) We finally then reached the fourth floor, but where is Midoriya and Kirishima? All these products is blocking the view. I can't see where they could be standing.

YAOYOROZU: (03:12) Right, but the makeup section on the 2nd floor was really amazing. There were so many items there, and brands that I had never heard of!

IIDA: (03:19) The interior products of the third floor were also amazing! There were even video games for T.V.! In addition to that, the prices were also much lower than usual.

YAOYOROZU: (03:26) As expected of Don Quixote!

IIDA: (03:28) *sorry I don’t understand what he is talking about* z

TODOROKI: (03:30) You ... Did you just come to buy?

YAOYOROZU and IIDA: (03:33) Uhmm…

TODOROKI: (03:34) why do we even enter this store?

YAOYOROZU: (03:36) To buy costumes for us, of course!

TODOROKI: (03:41) I get it, but

IIDA: (03:43) By the way, Yaoyorozu-kun, have you thought about what kind of costume you would like us to wear?

YAOYOROZU: (03:47) Anything is fine with me.

TODOROKI: (03:49) Anything?

YAOYOROZU: (03:51) Yes! I heard this from Ashido, but Don Quixote has many cosplay items, rather, specific costumes. Like a policeman, a nurse, a flight stewardess, a priestess, or even a magical girl.

IIDA: (04:05) If you wear the disguise of a fantasy concept as a magical girl, wouldn't it be a bit contradictory (to our goal)?

YAOYOROZU: (04:07) there are other options! Little red riding hood, “Urashimatarou”, “Momotarou”, and more!

TODOROKI: (04:13) If we wear these outfits, we will stand out even more.

IIDA: (04:15) Kamino is a very busy shopping district, and it is, also at night. I would like an outfit that fits the scene. but...

TODOROKI: (04:21) I am not very much into the trends these days.

IIDA: (04:23) I must say I am the same.

YAOYOROZU: (04:24) I'm a little familiar with Parisian fashion trends, but

TODOROKI: (04:28) The only one who knows trends among us is Kirishima, right? Let’s just ask him to choose what suits us.

IIDA: (04:35) I agree.

YAOYOROZU: (04:36) I have no objections.

TODOROKI: (04:38) Okay, then I'll find Kirishima and Midoriya and tell them. You wait here.

IIDA: (04:43) Okay, no problem.

YAOYOROZU: (04:44) We will wait here.

IIDA: (04:48) Well then, what should we do while we wait for Kirishima-kun and Midoriya-kun?

YAOYOROZU: (04:53) Since we are in already in Don Quixote, let's take a look at some other products!

IIDA: (04:57) You’re right!

YAOYOROZU: (04:58) Iida, look at this! Three pairs of these shoes for only 300 Yen!

IIDA: (05:02) Look at the towels here! 10 for 200 yen!

YAOYOROZU: (05:04) Why in this world everything is so cheap here? How would they make money with this price?

IIDA: (05:06) Not something relevant to investigate, but whoa! Are all these glasses here only 100 yen?!

YAOYOROZU: (05:10) This skirt here only costs 980 and there is a label that says 70% off too!

IIDA: (05:15) What an incredible store this is, Don Quixote!

YAOYOROZU: (05:17) It really is!

IIDA: (05:18) I’m so glad I came here!

YAOYOROZU: (05:20) Yes, me too!

TODOROKI: (05:21) Have you really forgotten what we came here for?

IIDA: (05:24) Of course not!

YAOYOROZU: (05:26) Yes, not at all!

~~end~~

I'm not fluent in neither Japanese or Spanish. Corrections are very much welcome.

[apiratewhopines]

Chapter 3 - Snow Falls

Summary: In which our heroine forges new paths

“I was just guessing at numbers and figures

Pulling the puzzles apart”

-The Scientist, Coldplay

The sunlight gently lightened the room until Emma woke with a start, her eyes frantically searching for some clue about whose bed she was in. With a groan, memories from the prior night returned and she wished she could go back to sleep.

After the doctor’s unceremonious exit, the tension broke. Liam was going to be fine and the world was right again. Graham’s shoulders relaxed, David looked like he wanted to use the opportunity to pull Mary Margaret into his arms and waltz around the room, Mary Margaret’s smile was so big that it literally brightened the gloomy light of the hospital and Killian’s jaw had unclenched. She had felt cut adrift because she thought the way his muscle twitched in his cheek was about the sexiest thing she had ever seen.

Unfortunately, a more immediate concern instantly renewed her stress. It was obvious that Liam hadn’t informed his brother of his impending arrival, much less that he was bringing company with him and Dr. Whale had pretty much told her she didn’t have to go home but she couldn’t stay there. Unless she wanted to crash in the chair in her partner’s room, she needed a place to sleep. Honestly, the chair was not really an option either since she was sure she would have to fight Killian for it.

She had decided her first priority should be to find her phone. She wasn’t normally one to be tied to an electronic device but with Henry traveling and the rest of her world off kilter, it seemed important to have a lifeline. Once she had it, she had planned to see if this town had Uber or taxi service, a hotel, and a 24 hour store since she was without wheels or any of the comforts of home and for the first time she had noticed that her clothes were bloodstained.

As it turned out, Mary Margaret took charge in a way both unexpected and jarring. Not only did the other woman have her phone, but when Emma revealed her lack of sleeping arrangements for the trip leaving Killian to awkwardly offer his extra bedroom up to her even though he wouldn’t be in residence, she had also smoothly intervened with an excuse of keeping Emma “under observation” in her guest room. Before Emma knew what was happening, she had been bundled into the other woman’s car with a promise from the deputy to drop her personal items off after they had finished processing them for evidence.

It hadn’t escaped her notice that you only needed evidence to investigate crimes, not so much for single vehicle car crashes, but she kept her questions to herself and had allowed the kindness of strangers to wash over her.

By the light of day though, she was extremely uncomfortable with the ease they all rearranged her life, albeit momentarily. Deciding the best thing to do would be to get cleaned up and go back to the hospital to check on Liam, she gingerly got out of bed. She was incredibly sore and as she moved over to the full length mirror in the corner, she lifted up her borrowed pajama top to examine the damage. The angry purple bruise covered several inches of her side and would probably last weeks. However, it was the only outward damage from the wreck other than the dark circles under her eyes from her sleepless night.

Wondering about the time, she was already reaching for her phone when it started to ring, alerting her to an incoming video call.

“Henry!” She answered, a big grin on her face and excitement in her voice.

“What’s up, Mom? Are you sleeping in?”

Her eyes scanned his face and she felt her nerves settle a little. “Yeah kid, Liam and I had an eventful night.”

“Yeah? Did you get to meet his brother? Liam told me he only has one hand, just like Captain Hook, and that he knows how to sword fight.”

The things her little boy found fascinating were a constant source of amusement for her. Although she had to admit that—in this case at least—those sorts of details would probably stick with anyone. She thought her observation of Killian the previous night had been pretty thorough but apparently she had missed some things.

For the obvious reason that ten-year-olds weren’t know for their ability to keep secrets and the likelihood of others overhearing her conversations, she had informed him of the trip nonchalantly on their last call, offering no explanation or reasons for it. And bless him, if Henry thought it was strange for her to be traveling with Liam, he didn’t question her about it. Despite the fact that she was sure Neal had some thoughts on the matter, for Henry nothing could be more natural than a road trip with a friend and Henry assumed his friends would automatically be hers.

“Yes, I did meet the famous Killian Jones,” she teased him, “but I can’t confirm his ability with a sword.” She blushed a little when she thought she heard a snicker from the first floor drift up to the open loft and was grateful that the innuendo would be lost on her son.

“Listen kid, I need to talk to you about something. Is your dad around?” She didn’t want to alarm him and she would feel better knowing Neal was close if the news upset him.

“Yeah, hold on a minute.” The camera moved away from his face as he ran over to wherever Neal was, the bouncy motion of the camera only making her a little sick. “Okay, he’s here.”

Neal’s smile and jaunty wave filled the camera view for a second before he took the phone from Henry and adjusted the angle so she could see them both. “Hey Emma, having a nice trip?”

“Actually, that’s what I wanted to talk about. We were in a little accident last night,” she started, keeping her attention on Henry and watching for his reaction.

“Crap, are you okay?” Neal said as Henry eyes started to cloud over.

“Yes, I’m totally fine,” she rushed to assure them, making sure she kept a big smile on her face. What she wouldn’t give to be there with Henry. For the thousandth time, she regretted her decision to spend a summer apart. “Liam is fine too, Henry. His arm is hurt but he’s going to be back to normal by the time you see him again.”

“Are you sure?” Henry looked hopeful but his voice was small. “He promised he would teach me how to play cricket.”

“Completely sure, kid,” she said. Thankfully he took the news pretty well but she wondered how he had managed to exact that promise from Liam. She knew that they had talks when Henry came to the office after school the one day a week she usually stayed late to do research or complete paperwork. There was only so much homework and video games he could tolerate before he wanted to be up and moving around. Once Liam told her he wasn’t disturbed by the interruption, she let Henry visit next door. She knew he indulged her son’s rampant curiosity but hadn’t realized Liam had taken him under his wing and might actually look forward their interactions. It made her feel a little guilty for giving the man such a hard time, all the time.

Taking her word for the matter, Henry moved on with nary another thought. He told her a little about what they had planned for their day of sightseeing and then announced he had to eat his breakfast and left the frame. Neal shouted a reminder that he was to eat cereal, not his favorite pop tarts, before turning his attention back to her. “Do we need to cut our trip short, Emma? We can come to you if you need us.”

God, she was tempted to tell him that she did need them to come back. She tamped down the selfish urge and said, “No, I really am fine. You guys deserve this time together.”

“Thank you,” he said and she knew he wasn’t only referencing their current situation. “I’ll have him call again tomorrow to check on you if you want.”

“That would be great.”

They said their goodbyes but she didn’t move for several minutes. Sitting on the bed, she tried to reroute her thoughts into some kind of plan for the day. Clothes were a must because while Mary Margaret’s things worked in a pinch, she couldn’t spend all day in them.

“Emma,” came the tentative voice of her host from below, “you have a visitor.”

Popping her head over the bannister, Emma looked down and the mop of dark hair let her know that her visitor was of the Jones variety. With a grimace, she checked out her reflection again. She looked like an overgrown child in the pajama shorts that were covered in bright red flowers and showed a little more leg than was probably appropriate, especially since they were topped off with a matching shirt that had ruffles at the sleeves. Add to that the fact that her hair had taken on a wild, rumpled look since she went to bed with it wet after a hasty shower to rinse off the worst of the night and she considered just carrying on the conversation from the loft. What she wouldn’t give for swipe of mascara and a little concealer for her eyes.

Making her way slowly down the steep steps, her foot barely touched the wooden floor of the living room when he asked, “Alright there, Swan?”

She wasn’t sure what she had been expecting but the cheerful friendliness of his voice and the crooked smile was a definite improvement over the shocked awkwardness and confusion of last night. His eyes still followed her movements with an emotion she couldn’t quite decipher. But that could be because she was shy about meeting his gaze, probably stemming from how gorgeous she found him and not wanting to make a fool of herself.

“He brought breakfast,” Mary Margaret gushed, pushing a box of pastries towards her. “I’m going to get ready while you two catch up.”

They both watched her step into the bathroom. When Emma heard the shower start, knowing that was about as much privacy as they could expect in the open floor plan space, she reached for a bear claw. “Thanks, these are my favorites.”

“Least I could do,” he responded, as much at a loss as she was apparently. He kept staring at her and it was starting to get unnerving.

“How’s Liam this morning?” Glancing over at the clock on the microwave, she amended, “Or afternoon rather.”

“He woke up for a few minutes and was his normal pleasant self,” Killian reported.

As she sat down, she imagined how grumpy her partner would have been having all his carefully laid plans ruined before they had ever been set in motion. It did explain why his brother seemed in a better mood though.

“He was concerned about your welfare, love. Gave me a quite an earful when he found out I had sent you out into the world with only Mary Margaret for protection while I kept vigil at his bedside. He’s sleeping again now so I decided it was time for us to have a little chat.”

Deciding to focus on the least troubling part of his statement, namely the implication that the only hospital volunteer in history who took work home with her wasn’t a force to be reckoned with, she said in a thoughtful tone, “I wouldn’t bet against her.”

When he didn’t pick up the thread of conversation, she reached for another pastry. It felt like he trying to wait her out, letting the silence that stretched between them drive her to reveal all her secrets.

Just when things were getting truly uncomfortable and she started to pray for Mary Margaret to finish her damn shower soon, he caved. “I apologize for last night. I’m afraid I didn’t make the best first impression and maybe I’m not doing much better today since I neglected to ask how you are feeling.”

“Well, your brother deserves some of the blame for the disaster that was our first meeting,” she conceded lightly. “If I had known we were dropping by unannounced in the dead of night, he would have gotten an earful of his own. I should have known better than to think he would have communicated like a normal human being.”

He was looking at her again with that weird far-off expression. Her skin tingled from his nearness and she tried to ignore that his body had leaned closer to hers.

Rushing to steer the conversation away from dangerous areas and wanting to put some distance between them, she jumped up. Walking over to the fridge to see if there was any milk, she called over her shoulder, “I am much better today. Looking forward to getting my stuff back and maybe finding a permanent place to stay. Unless you want to trade out the chair in Liam’s room.”

“Sorry love, brother’s prerogative.” He tensed as if he was expecting her to call on some privilege of her own. Any good will Liam had gained for his treatment of her son was lost as she fumed about his indifference to the feelings of his own brother. When she remained quiet, he added, “You’re welcome to stay at my place though. After all, if Liam brought you home, you must practically be family and you’ll end up there anyway when they release him. You are most welcome. I’m sorry I didn’t make that clear last night.”

She wondered how long they could both dance around the topic without addressing the elephant in the room. She knew he was baffled about her sudden appearance in his brother’s life and out of everyone in this town, he had the most right to ask about it. She wasn’t sure she would be able to make it through the next couple of weeks without lying to him at some point but she wasn’t going to jump in with guns blazing so she would keep circling until he questioned her directly.

“Fine.” She took her time pouring her milk and when he shook his head at her silent offer to get some for him as well, she put the carton back and took up a position across the island from him. “If you don’t mind me staying there without you, I’ll take you up on it.”

Mary Margaret joined them before any other details could be sorted and the other woman’s disappointed face at losing her house guest so soon reminded Emma of when Henry was younger and pleas for more cookies went unheeded. Emma gratefully accepted her freshly laundered jeans that the woman had somehow managed to find time to clean, waving off her apology for not being able to salvage the shirt. Instead, she found a crisp, white linen tank that she was informed was a gift to welcome her to town.

She felt like a new woman coming downstairs in clean clothes and with several hours of sleep. Swearing on her honor to meet up with her hostess for lunch that weekend and awkwardly accepting her hug goodbye, she followed Killian down to his pickup truck without another word. He held her door as she climbed into the passenger side before making his way around the front and taking his own seat.

“I await your orders, Swan. Where to first?”

“If you think Liam will be resting for awhile, can we go by the station and pick up my stuff?” Luckily, Mary Margaret had provided a toothbrush last night but it would be nice to have the rest of her things. She had to suppress a chuckle at the thought that the deputy, David if she remembered correctly, would probably begrudge her the missed opportunity of making a visit to a certain brunette’s apartment.

Even though he kept his eyes on the road, somehow he picked up on her change in mood and asked, “Something tickled your fancy?”

“What’s her story?”

“Mary Margaret?”

“Yeah. Does she always pick up strays and bring them back to her apartment? I could have robbed her blind. It’s not safe to trust people like that,” she rambled as she took in the businesses that lined Main Street.

“I wouldn’t call you a stray and you don’t strike me as a thief,” he commented.

“You don’t know me,” Emma said darkly. She had been called that and far worse too many times and his casual observation caused her to stiffen in her seat. Out of the corner of her eye, she saw him stiffen a bit too but she was distracted by the sign for the pawnshop they just passed. The closed sign hung askew in the front window and all the lights were off even though it was the middle of the day.

“I’d like to know you, Swan. In case you didn’t notice—bringing breakfast, my sparkling conversation, the dashing rescue from having to stay another night in Mary Margaret’s loft, which apparently you viewed as a fate worse than death—all my little ways of trying to get to know you.”

His exasperation struck her as funny. He was more dramatic than his brother and as much as she planned to struggle against and deny her attraction to him, she thought she might end up actually liking him. He pulled off the street into a parking lot and faced her. “Furthermore, Miss Swan, you’re the one who went home with her so perhaps you should have followed your own advice. Maybe she’s a serial killer and she lures her victims in with kindness. Or maybe deep down you know there are good people in this world and it’s better to trust, to risk the occasional mistake, than to hide behind walls.”

Well. She wanted to take offense but she was too stunned at the fact that Killian Jones truly saw her. And maybe through her. How he had figured her out so fast, she wasn’t sure. She felt exposed and, even more chilling, she felt understood. It was exciting and dangerous. Eyes wide, she twisted to face him and licked the corner of her mouth nervously. His focus shifted to her lips. It was getting warm, and not only because of this unexpected turn in their discussion. It was summer and they were sitting in direct sun. That was her story and she was sticking to it.

Smirking at her own reaction more than his, she asked, “Are you finished?”

“For now,” he said softly and it sounded like a vow wrapped in a threat. He faced the front again and turned off the truck. The muscle spasm in his cheek was back and she was a little ashamed at how much she had missed it.

“Great. Consider me suitably chastised. Good to know that sanctimonious speeches are a Jones family trait,” she said with a genuine smile before kicking open the door and leaving him behind.

—

It was more of a battle to get her personal belonging than it should have been. Luckily David showed up halfway through her argument with the man on duty and signed off on the release of all but one of their bags. Killian had brooded for a few minutes but eventually followed her into the station and helped carry the bags first to the truck and then into his place when they reached it.

She hadn’t had time to think about what his home would look like but the oceanfront cottage was much nicer than she would have pictured if she had tried. It occurred to her that while she knew he had a affair about a decade ago, that he could sword fight, that he had the most expressive face she had ever encountered, and apparently could read her like a book, she really didn’t know that much about him. Like what he did for a living that allowed him to afford a place like this.

In what she thought was a sage decision, she had backed off after their run-in or she would have given into her interest and asked him. He had been subdued during the ride and as a person who liked to lick her wounds in private she knew when she met a like soul so she kept things light. Complimenting the view and the peaceful color scheme of creams and blues, she took only long enough to drop her bag in the guest room before swiftly exiting his space and walking back to the truck.

He seemed a bit more like his earlier self by the time they reached the hospital. He offered to pick up some coffee from the cafeteria for them, probably thinking she’d want some time alone with Liam.

It was with some surprise that she found that Liam already had a visitor, although it appeared he was asleep and may not be aware of it. Emma heard a sniffle and saw the woman’s shoulders shaking and immediately tried to back out of the room to give them some time. It was a sound plan until she caught her injured side on the door handle with a loud crack and couldn’t stop herself from dancing around a little bit and whispering in hissed pain, “Crap! Crap! That really hurts!”

The woman came to her feet in one fluid motion, wiping at her tears with the back of her hand and looking embarrassed. She was beyond beautiful, her long white blonde hair cascading in loose waves down her back and wearing sky blue scrubs that looked like a ball gown on her. And unlike Emma, she was able to cry without looking like a complete wreck for the rest of the day.

“I’m sorry—“ they said at the exact same moment and then they both chuckled quietly, intent on not disturbing the patient. Emma took a deep breath, trying to work the pain out from the inside. It made her want to punch something because it hurt so bad. Refusing to give into it, she continued drawing air in and out slowly.

Once the stars that had sparked around her faded, she thought it safe to try to introduce herself. “Emma Swan.”

Before the other woman could reply, she heard Killian behind her. “Elsa, I would have brought you a coffee if I had known you were here.”

He moved past her and placed a quick kiss on Elsa’s cheek and offered her his cup. So, clearly a friend of the family Emma gathered. Move along, nothing to see here. Except she was pretty sure that crying at the bedside of an unconscious man was some next level stuff. Internally, she cursed Liam and his sneaky secrets.

“Oh I’m fine, Killian, I had a little break in my day and decided to check up on my newest patient,” she explained nervously, as if she owed Emma a reason for her visit.

Trying to ease some of the woman’s tension, she smiled kindly and guessed, “Are you a doctor here?”

“Physical therapist,” Elsa explained with a grin of her own and Emma was once again struck by how beautiful the woman was as she moved to stand next to her. If the physical therapy thing didn’t work out for her, she could be a model or a queen or a goddess.

“Liam will be in good hands then,” she replied, and then wondered if she said something wrong with the way both Killian and Elsa shuffled uncomfortably. Seriously, what the hell was the story here.

“Yes. Well, I should get going,” Elsa admitted, eyes not quite meeting Emma’s stare. Her smile for Killian was more natural though. She left quickly, a less graceful person than her would have been accused of trotting out of the room.

Blowing out the breath she hadn’t realized she was holding, Emma looked over at Killian with a raised eyebrow. He was busy scratching behind his ear, a mannerism that made him look like a guilty toddler.

“I guess Liam told you about Elsa.” His gruffness showed he resented the situation his brother had put him in.

You and me both, Emma wanted to say. Considering she was reasonably certain that the ‘difficult circumstance’ Liam had mentioned during the road trip had just walked out the door as if the hounds of hell were at her feet, she didn’t think it was a lie when she said, “Of course.”

Because the fact was, calling what had evidently been a serious relationship a ‘difficult circumstance’ was probably as close as Liam would come to baring his soul anyway.

His shoulders relaxed knowing he wouldn’t be the one to break the news. Assessing her mood, he added in a disbelieving tone, “I assume by your peaceful air that you have no issues with Elsa, the love of his life, taking care of him during his convalescence?”

“Those weren’t quite the words he used when we talked,” she confessed, hating that she felt like she should be the one apologizing about this mess.

“He wouldn’t have with you, would he?” He looked chagrined, as if he suddenly realized that referring to another woman as the love of his brother’s life may have offended her.

“Not sure what you mean but to answer your question, I have no problem with Elsa doing her job.” There. Perhaps not the whole truth but she was getting better at skirting the lies. “We’re all grown-ups here, aren’t we, Jones?”

In a moment of blinding honesty, Killian said with a touch of awe, “I’m not sure what to make of you, Swan.”

“Good,” she laughed, the sound becoming a peace offering between them and allowing the rest of the afternoon to pass without any tension.

[hilltopsunset]

I Regret Buying Pokémon Shield

I told myself I wouldn’t do it. I’ve seen time and again the lack of innovation from main-series Pokémon games, and I insisted nothing would convince me to buy this latest atrocity. Yet here I am, reviewing the game I said I’d never purchase. I should have listened to myself. I KNEW BETTER! Strap in, ‘cause this one’s pretty long.

Pokémon has been around for a long time—like, a long, long time—and I’ve been around for every single new main-series game that’s been released since the franchise’s first arrival in North America back in 1996 with Red/Blue. I was not yet 10 years old, and I still remember the childlike excitement of finding rare, never-before seen creatures, the stress of trying to catch a wily Abra or elusive Pinsir, and the challenging first encounter with the Elite Four and the Champion, a 5-man gauntlet of trainers with powerful Pokémon rarely (if ever) seen in the game prior to that moment. It was exhilarating in a way that keeps me coming back for more, hoping to rekindle those same flames of wonder. 

While the main gist of the games hasn’t changed much over the years, one of my favorite parts of playing a new Pokémon game is seeing the improvements each game brings to the series. Many of the initial sequels made huge leaps in progress: Gold/Silver introduced a plethora of new mechanics like held items and breeding; Ruby/Sapphire introduced passive abilities and was the first to include multi-battles in the form of double-battles; Diamond/Pearl was the first generation capable of trading and battling online and brought us the revolutionary physical/special split so elements were no longer locked into one or the other. These changes all had significant impacts on how players approached battles, formed their teams, and used each Pokémon.

Those changes, combined with the addition of new Pokémon to catch, regions to explore, and enemies to fight, were enough to keep me interested. But I know I wasn’t alone in imagining all the possibilities of taking the franchise off the handheld platforms and moving the main series games over to a more powerful home console. In the meantime, each generation that followed Gen IV highlighted a new, troubling pattern that became more and more prevalent with each addition to the series.

1.       Gen V: Lack of meaningful gameplay innovation

By Generation V with Black/White, not only was Game Freak quickly running out of colors, they were quite obviously running out of ideas for significant gameplay innovation. The bulk of Black/White’s biggest changes were improvements on or adaptations to existing staples to the franchise: many new Pokémon, moves, and abilities were added, and the DS platform allowed for greater graphical quality where Pokémon could move around a bit more on-screen during battles, the camera wasn’t as rigid as it had to be in previous games due to machine limitations; perhaps most importantly, they FINALLY decided to make TMs infinite. Thank goodness. While the updates were nice, they were nowhere near as impactful on the game as previous generations’ changes were and served more as needed quality of life adjustments.

I would also argue Gen V also had the least inspired Pokémon designs (like Vanillux and Klinklang) with the worst starter choices of any Pokémon game, but that’s a discussion for another time. Excadrill and Volcarona were pretty cool, though.

 2.       Gen VI: Gimmicks as the main draw

Pokémon X/Y (See? They ran out of colors) continued this new downward trend in innovation. Mega-evolution—while admittedly pretty cool—wasn’t enough to carry the new generation into an era of meaningful improvement because it was equivalent to adding new Pokémon rather than developing innovative gameplay, ushering in a new era of gimmicks in lieu of substantial updates.

Though the gameplay innovation for X/Y was minimal, the graphic updates were substantial: Pokémon X/Y was the first generation to introduce the main series to a fully 3-dimensional world populated by 3D characters. However, since X/Y was on the 3DS, it was a ripe target for the 3D gimmick seen in almost all games on the console, which I personally used for all of 5 minutes before feeling nauseous and never using the function again.

Despite the fresh look of the new 3D models, the battle animations were, to be frank, incredibly disappointing. Pokémon still barely moved and never physically interacted with opponents, nor did they use moves in uniquely appropriate ways. To my point, for years now there’s been a meme about Blastoise opting to shoot water out of his face rather than his cannons. I was sad to see that they didn’t take the time to give each Pokémon’s animations a little more love. But I figured, in time, when or if the franchise ever moved to a more powerful machine, they would be better equipped to make it happen, right? I also convinced myself that the lack of refined animations were kind of charming, harkening back to the games’ original (terrible) animations.

 3.       Gen VII: Focus on Minigames

The main innovation (gimmick) that came with Generation VII, Sun/Moon, was the lack of HMs in lieu of riding certain Pokémon. Sun/Moon also added Ultra Beasts (essentially just new Pokémon) and Z-moves (just new moves) which only added to the number of gimmicks present in the games. These changes, which provide some mild adaptations to gameplay from previous generations, don’t fundamentally change the way players go through each game, the way that updates in the earlier generations did. I personally played through the entirety of Sun/Moon without using a single Z-move or seeing a single Ultra Beast outside the one you’re required to fight to progress the main story. Ultimately, these changes were not a significant enough experience to warrant an entirely new game that is otherwise full of more of the same stuff with slightly different creatures who have slightly different stats and occupy a slightly different world.

Though Sun/Moon was comfortably embracing the franchise’s affinity for gimmicks, it brought to the forefront yet another troubling trend: mini games. Between photography, the Festival Plaza, and Poké Pelago, the focus on and attention to detail toward mini games had grown considerably over the years. Pokémon games have always had minigames and other time-sinks—which is great! Don’t get me wrong, I appreciate having more to do than trudge through the main story. But it is apparent that, with each new generation, more time seems dedicated to development of these extras. Pokémon Contests, Secret Bases, Super Training, feeding/grooming; a lot of their larger innovations after Gen IV were centered on non-essential parts of the game, which results in diminished game and story quality overall.

Admittedly, Sun/Moon did have some of the best exploration moments of any of the Pokémon games, which I did very much appreciate. More on that later as it relates to Sword/Shield…

 4.       Generation VIII: You Can’t Be Serious

When Game Freak finally announced they were launching Generation VIII, Sword and Shield, on the Switch rather than a dedicated handheld console, I was beside myself with excitement.

And then I saw gameplay footage like this, and my heart sank.

What is the purpose of launching the game on a stronger console if they are going to continue copy/pasting their sprites and their animations? If they aren’t going to provide the Pokémon any unique flair or create more appropriate animations? It was disappointing enough seeing the same animations/models from X/Y for Sun/Moon, but that was sort of expected since the games were on the same console. But now that the game has moved to the Switch, this is unacceptable.

When I learned that they were significantly cutting the number of Pokémon available in the game, I thought for certain that would translate to more time dedicated to the ones that made the cut, to focus on adding animations and character to the critters to make them feel like real parts of the world, rather than avatars of a child’s imagination, unable to fully process how the world functions. Alas, what was I thinking?

I thought the Dynamax gimmick would be one of my biggest gripes because it’s so pointless, or maybe the Wild Area’s severe lack of organic belonging (all Pokémon are just wandering aimlessly, weather can change drastically after crossing an invisible line, trees look like they were cut and pasted out of Mario 64, you can’t even catch Pokémon if they’re too high a level) but honestly the most disappointing part of the game for me was the pitiful routes between towns/gyms. Previous installments of the game included routes full of trainers and puzzles you needed to defeat or solve before you could progress—in Sword/Shield, the only thing that ever prevents you from progressing are some Team Yell grunts barricading paths the game doesn’t want you to take yet, for literally no reason. It completely removes player autonomy and a sense of accomplishment earned through overcoming challenges—now instead of learning that you need to find an item that allows you to cut through certain trees to gain access to new areas, you simply follow the story beats and then, upon returning, the path will be open. It’s inorganic, it’s clunky, and it’s extremely lazy.

Speaking of lazy, the story itself was another massive disappointment for me. Pokémon games are not particularly known for having deep stories, but Sword/Shield takes it to a new low. Every NPC simply pushes you to battle in gyms, and every interesting story beat that occurs happens just outside the player-character’s reach. Any time something interesting happens, you are shooed away and told to let the grown-ups handle it while you just get your gym badges. There COULD have been some interesting story moments where your character gets more involved with helping fix the havoc occurring around the Galar Region, but instead we as the player are simply TOLD what happened, why it happened, and who fixed it (usually the champion, Leon).

I honestly think having the game focus on the story of Sonia, Bede, Marnie, or even Hop (was not a fan of this kid) would have been a much more interesting game, because those characters actually had some depth to them, some bigger reason for taking on the gym challenges than simply “I want to be the very best.” Albeit those stories would have required a tremendous amount of work to add depth and details, the potential for a better story is in those characters. There is just no story at all to the main character, who is ushered from gym to gym because…because? Because that’s what kids do? I’m not even really sure what the motivation is.

There are SO MANY exciting, interesting, innovative ways Game Freak could drive Pokémon into a new and exciting direction while still maintaining its charm and building on existing mechanics, but they instead choose to demonstrate their lack of interest in significant graphical and gameplay innovation. I imagine this is largely because the masses will eat up just about any Pokémon product produced so long as there’s a new bunny to catch, and Pikachu is still involved. I’m disappointed, and I wish the Galar region could meet the expectations of my 10-year old mind’s imagination.

When abilities were added, we suddenly had to consider whether our Earthquake could even hit the enemy Weezing and adapt to the tremendous changes the passive skills added, reconsidering how we faced each battle. When the physical/special split occurred, entirely new opportunities opened up and certain Pokémon who were banished to obscurity due to their poor typing and stat distribution, like Weavile, were suddenly viable. Some even became incredibly powerful, like Gyarados, who had been hit pretty hard by the Special attack/defense split. There were also already-powerful Pokémon (Gengar, Dragon-types) who became even more so through access to STAB moves that benefited off their strongest stats.

I want new games to include updates that feel as impactful as these changes. If you’re interested in how Game Freak can improve on the main gameplay, I have some fun ideas that will be fleshed out in another article: How to Breathe New Life into the Pokémon Franchise. That article will be dedicated to explaining what those changes are, why I want them, and how they can improve future games.

[coolgreatwebsite]

Cool Games I Finished In 2020 (In No Real Order)

Oh, hey! Right! I have a website! I’m like a week late on writing this, but what’s a week on top of an entire year of not writing, right? 2020 was... well, we all know what 2020 was. For me personally, it was simultaneously the best and worst year of my life. The worst in both ways you can probably assume and ways you definitely can’t (neither of which I’ll be getting into), and the best in ways I absolutely never would have guessed. That uncertain job I mentioned last year got very suddenly much more certain, at a much bigger company, for a much larger amount of money. That allowed me to get my own place, making my weird living situation much less weird. Still haven’t gotten the majority of my belongings off of the east coast, but if the entire world wasn’t currently fucked up by a global pandemic I’d have sorted all that out too. What I’m saying is that, for the third year in a row, my life has been a complete whirlwind that has left me very little time to get comfortable with any aspect of it. But I did manage to play more video games than I did last year! Which is perfect, because it’s once again time for another one of these. Here’s a bunch of cool games I experienced for the first time in 2020.

Astro’s Playroom (PlayStation 5, 2020)

My one word description of Astro's Playroom is "delightful". It's just an absolute goddamn delight. A total surprise too! Included with every PlayStation 5, Astro's Playroom is, in my opinion, one of the best pack-in games of all time.

First off, it's an incredible tech demo for the PS5's new DualSense controller. It was easy to brush off Sony's talk about the controller's haptic feedback and triggers as some Nintendo-style HD Rumble bullshit, but it really is incredibly cool once you get your hands on it. The game is obviously more than a tech demo though, or else it wouldn't be on here. It also just so happens to be an extremely solid and fun platformer on top of that. Astro controls exceptionally well and the levels are all well-designed and fun, even the gimmick vehicle ones designed to show off different features of the controller. It also has an oddly compelling speedrun mode, made all the more compelling by the PS5 notifying you when your friends beat your times and the ability to load into it within two seconds from anywhere on the console. But the biggest thing for me and, call me a mark, because I am, is that the game is an honestly incredible love letter to PlayStation history.

For the first time ever, Sony has pulled off a nostalgia piece without it ending up as embarrassing garbage in the vein of PlayStation All-Stars Battle Royale. There's a Nintendo-like joyful reverence for all things PlayStation oozing out of every single corner of this game. There are so many nods and references and gags for literally every PlayStation thing of note throughout the the last 25 years, and then on top of that there's a whole heap more for the things that AREN'T of note that only hyperdorks like me would get! A sly reference to the ill-fated boomerang controller? Yep. A goof on the fat PS3's Spider-Man font? You betcha. A trophy you can earn by repeatedly punching a Sony Interactive Entertainment sign until it breaks and reveals the Sony Computer Entertainment sign it was slapped on top of? Yeah buddy. It's deep cuts all the way down, even up until the final boss which had me grinning like a total dipshit the entire time. The game is endlessly, effortlessly charming.

Animal Crossing: New Horizons (Nintendo Switch, 2020)

Animal Crossing: New Horizons was the perfect game at the perfect time. That doesn't mean it's a perfect game, I actually have some issues with it, but it could not have released at a better time than when it did. It came out at the very very beginning of everyone going into lockdown due to the pandemic, and it was the biggest game in the world for a couple of months as a result. I played like 300 hours and that pales in comparison to the amount of time many others put into it.

Animal Crossing: New Horizons is the most different Animal Crossing game there's ever been, and I'm of two minds on it. Like, I loved the game, I played a ton of it, but it's lacking so much of the stuff that made me love Animal Crossing in the first place. The series has been slowly trending in this direction for a bit now, but it's not really a game that happens around you anymore. It's all about total player control. You select where everything goes, you customize every detail of everything to your liking, hell, you can even terraform the landmass to be exactly what you want. Your neighbors take a backseat in focus and end up as little more than decorations with limited dialogue and next to no quests associated with them. Series staples like Gyroids are missing in action. Facilities and services that have been around since Wild World aren't implemented. It's similar to past Animal Crossing games in a lot of ways, but on the whole it feels like a different thing.

But like I said, two minds. New Horizons strays from what I truly want from an Animal Crossing game, but I can't deny that the game as it is is a hell of a lot of fun. There's SO much you can do and SO many options, it's super addictive. Plus it implemented my long-requested feature of letting you effortlessly send mail to friends online! Too bad the actual online play is as cumbersome as ever.

In conclusion, Animal Crossing: New Horizons is a land of contrasts. I'm kidding. It's good, but definitely missing something in a way where I can understand some people being disappointed in it. I had a ton of fun though, and I'm probably going to get back into it later in 2021.

Trials of Mana (Nintendo Switch, 2019)

Late in 2019, with the physical release of Collection of Mana for the Switch, I decided I was going to play through each game on it for the first time and finally find out what this whole Mana thing was about. I went into Final Fantasy Adventure (the first game in the Mana series, because every RPG had to be Final Fantasy back then) with zero expectations and found a totally serviceable little Zelda-like with light RPG elements. I enjoyed my time with it. I went into Secret of Mana with the expectation of it being a beloved classic and found the worst game I beat that year, hands down. That game fucking sucks. I get why it made an impression on people at the time, but it's just so so SO awful to play. Needless to say I was pretty disappointed. Honestly, I would have been disappointed even if I hadn't heard it was one of "the best games" for so long. It would have been a disappointing follow-up to Final Fantasy Adventure, a game that in and of itself isn't anything incredible. Secret of Mana is just that rotten.

I braced myself for more disappointment when (after a much needed vacation from the series) I started up Trials of Mana. This game had a reputation too, as a long-lost classic that never made it stateside. One of the best games on the Super Nintendo, criminally never released for western audiences! Like Secret of Mana before it, I'd heard nothing but effusive praise. Unlike Secret of Mana, however, I was very pleased to find out that Trials of Mana mostly lives up to the hype. From a gameplay standpoint, Trials is an improvement on Secret in almost every single way. It's not perfect. The menus are still kinda clunky, animations for things like magic and items are still frequently disruptive. But the main thing is it actually plays like a sensible video game designed by humans with brains. Attacking is responsive! Hitboxes aren't complete nonsense! You don't constantly get stunlocked to death! There are more answers to combat than casting the same spell for five straight minutes to kill your enemies before they get a chance to move! It's great!

On top of being an enjoyable video game to actually play, the presentation is top notch. Secret of Mana could be a pretty game with decent music in some spots, but Trials is consistently gorgeous and the soundtrack is across the board great instead of randomly having songs that sound like clown vomit. And while Trials of Mana doesn't have the deepest story in the world, it manages to avoid being completely paper-thin like Secret. The story actually kind of has a reason for being a bit straightforward, and the reason is that it has a really cool system where you pick your three playable characters from a pool of six. Each character has their own goals and storyline, some of which line up with other potential party members, some of which don't, and you'll even run into the characters you didn't choose as NPCs along the way. This and the relatively brisk pace of the game make it highly replayable.

I'm really glad that Trials of Mana made it over here in an official capacity, even if it was like 25 years late. It's as good as I expected Secret of Mana to be and singlehandedly saved my interest in seeing any more of the series. I'm aware the quality of what came after is very spotty, but I'll get to the rest eventually!

Final Fantasy VII Remake (PlayStation 4, 2020)

They (almost) did it. They (basically) pulled it off. They remade (a chunk of) Final Fantasy VII and (for the most part) didn't fuck it up. Ok, funny parentheticals aside, Final Fantasy VII Remake is astoundingly good coming off of over two decades of just absolutely dreadful post-FF7 sequels, side games, and movies.

Final Fantasy VII has been historically misremembered as this kind of miserable, angsty, brooding thing, both by fans and by the company that made it. FF7-branded media after FF7 itself is a minefield of changed personalities, embarrassing original characters, and monumentally lame stories. Final Fantasy VII Remake is the first post-FF7 anything that actually remembers the characters, setting, and plot of Final Fantasy VII and what made them memorable and special to people in the first place. Which isn't to say it's a slavish recreation! There's a ton of changes and additions, and I actually like almost all of them! Except for some really big stuff I'll touch on in a bit!

The combat in Final Fantasy VII Remake is great. I was super skeptical about it when the game was first announced, but they actually managed to make the blend of real-time action and turn-based RPG menuing fun and engaging. The characters all play super differently from each other too, which is a huge and welcome difference from the original game. The Materia system fits like a glove in this revamped combat system as well. The remixed music is good as hell, and the visuals are beautiful (outside of a couple of very specific spots that I'm kinda of surprised they haven't fixed in a patch yet). It's a well-executed package all around.

But alas, as always, there are negatives. For starters, this is only part one of the overall Final Fantasy VII Remake project. It goes up to the party leaving Midgar which, as you may or may not recall, is the first six hours of the original game. They compensated for this by fleshing the hell out of the Midgar section the game, ballooning the overall playtime to total of about 30-ish hours. The game feeling padded is a common complaint but for what it's worth, I didn't really feel it until the unnecessarily long final dungeon, There's also the previously mentioned and funny parenthetical'd changes and additions I don't like.

This is big time spoilers for this game so if you don't want that jump ahead to the next game on the list. The Whispers suck ass. Final Fantasy VII Remake should have been brave enough to be different without having to constantly derail everything in the most ham-fisted and intrusive way possible. You can have Jessie twist her ankle without making a spooky plot ghost trip her. I don't want to fight the physical manifestation of the game everyone thought they were getting as an end boss. If you're not doing a straight remake, that's fine, but have the fucking guts to stand by your artistic decisions without feeling the need to invent the lamest deus ex machina I've ever fucking seen. The last couple of hours of this game are 100% about the Whispers and are awful for it. It's a true testament to the strength of the rest of Final Fantasy VII Remake that this aspect didn't completely sour me on it. I can only hope that they stay dead and gone for good in the games yet to come and the remake can be different while standing on its own two feet.

I truly cannot wait for the next entry in the Final Fantasy VII Remake project. I'm excited for Final Fantasy VII in a way I haven't been since the late 90s. I have a bit of trepidation that they could royally screw it up. I mean, they already got kinda close, as I said in my last paragraph. But they got so much right in this entry that, for the first time in decades, I'm willing to believe in Square Enix when it comes to Final Fantasy VII.

13 Sentinels: Aegis Rim (PlayStation 4, 2020)

My one word description of 13 Sentinels is "fucking crazy". I realize that's two words, but shut up. A bizarre hybrid of visual novel, adventure game, and strategy RPG, 13 Sentinels not only makes that work, but makes it work incredibly well. 

The story is fucking bonkers. It's told entirely non-linearly and is purposefully dense and confusing, but it does an amazing job of hooking you with a cast of likable characters and some impressively well-paced twists, made all the more impressive by the fact that you can tackle the story in basically whatever order you want. I'll say it again for those in the back, the story is Fucking Bonkers. Wherever you think it's going, it's not going. Where it is going is PLACES. Seriously, if you want a wild goddamn ride, this is the game for you. The presentation is also stunning. It's a drop dead gorgeous game with a really nice soundtrack. Easily Vanillaware's best looking game, which is saying something seeing as looking good is Vanillaware's whole deal.

If I had to levy one criticism against the game, it's that the strategy RPG portion is just kind of ok. It's enjoyable enough, it doesn't get in the way and there's not too much of it, but once it starts introducing armored versions of previous enemy types it's kind of done doing anything different. It is really good at getting people to out themselves as having no idea what tower defense is as a genre though!

Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition (Nintendo Switch, 2018)

I haven't really historically been a "Musou Guy". Not to say I've actively disliked them, they're just not something I've seeked out very often or played very much of. Hyrule Warriors: Definitive Edition kinda turned me into a "Musou Guy" a little bit? It's good, surprisingly-less-mindless-than-you'd-think fun.

I actually super don't care about the Zelda branding. I think all the fanservice stuff is meh at best. What I do care about is that there's a ton of character variety and a metric shitload of content. There's so many different characters and weapons for those characters that all play differently from one another and SOOOOOO many levels to play. Like the story mode is, again, kinda meh, the real meat of the game is the Adventure mode and there's a ton of it. It's 8 different world maps, each based off a different Zelda game, with each square of the map containing a little mini-scenario with unique objectives and rewards. There has to be at least 1000 scenarios between all the maps. There's so much. And that's not even getting into some of the other side stuff like the challenge modes and the fairy raising. It's a crazy amount of game in this game.

And again, it's not as mindless as it'd seem. It's not really a game ABOUT destroying 5000 guys, it's an area control and resource management game where the 5000 guys are one of those resources. Knowing who to send where and when to fight who is way more important than pressing the XXX YYY XXX YYY on the more than one million troops.

I'd say that if you're even cursorily potentially maybe interested in a musou game, this is the one to try. And if you like it, it could literally be your forever game. A sequel came out recently too, and I'm looking forward to trying that out soon.

Phantasy Star Online 2 (Xbox One, 2020)

Phantasy Star Online 2 finally came stateside in the year 2020, eight years after its initial Japanese release and initial American cancellation. It's no Phantasy Star Online 1, but it is a really fun game in its own right provided you can find the willpower to break through its clunkiness and eight years of confusing poorly tutorialized free-to-play MMO cruft.

The main thing going for PSO2, and this is a major improvement from PSO1, is that the act of engaging in its combat is fun. The combat is just feels really really good. There's a bunch of different weapon types and classes, and once you find the ones that really click with you you're in for a good time, whether you're izuna dropping dudes with wire claws or literally doing air juggles and rainstorm from Devil May Cry with the dual machine guns.

The other stuff around that combat is weird. I generally like it, but it's weird. The story mode is one of the most bizarrely presented things I've ever seen. It apparently used to be something you'd seek out in the levels themselves, but presently it's just a list of scenes you pick from a menu and watch with next to no context until it makes you fight a boss sometimes. There's some weird moments in there that MIGHT have been cool if it were presented in literally any other way?

The systems and presentation are also way more... I dunno, pinball? Pachislot? In very stark contrast to how chill original Phantasy Star Online was, everything in PSO2 is designed in a way to maximize that flashy light bing bing wahoo you got ~*~RARE DROP CHANCE UP~*~  feeling. Which isn't to say I don't like flashy light bing bing wahoo, but it's a weird different thing.

Was it worth the wait? Yeah, sure! For me! This is another one that I played like 300 hours of! I haven't even seen half of it, I fell off right before Episode 4 released because it coincided with my move! I'm gonna go back and see all that shit! PSO2's fun! A different flavor of fun than the original, sure, but fun all the same. Another one that I'm glad finally made it over here.

Riichi Mahjong (A Table, 1924)

Holy shit I fucking did it I finally learned how to play Mahjong and it rules.

It started when I picked up Clubhouse Games for the Switch. I saw that it had Riichi Mahjong and something in my brain snapped. For whatever reason, I decided that this was the time I was going to rip the band-aid off and figure this shit out. It wasn't too dissimilar to the first time I decided to try eggs, but that's a different and much stupider story for a different time. I did the tutorial in Clubhouse Games, looked up some more basics and advice because the tutorial wasn't super amazing, and I kept playing while being aided by the game's nice helper features like the button that pulls up recommended hands. I kept playing and... sorta got it. I learned the basic rules, but none of the strategy. And then I stopped playing for a few months.

In that few months, for whatever reason, a decent amount of people I know had their brains snap the same way? Like a more-than-two amount of people I'm either friends with or following online also decided to learn Mahjong. I decided to get back on the horse and downloaded Mahjong Soul and I don't know whether it was perseverance or the power of anime babes, but this time I got it. I still refer to a sheet with all the hands and whether they work open or closed, and I'm by no means a master player, but I actually honest to god understand what I'm doing and it's an incredible feeling.

Mahjong has such a huge amount of what I like to call "Get That Ass" energy. It is the energy you feel when you get someone's ass. In Mahjong you are either constantly getting someone's ass or getting your ass gotten. Someone puts down the wrong tile and you fucking GET THEIR ASS DUDE! They're got!! They're a fucking idiot that put down the wrong thing and now you have their points!!! Or you draw what you need yourself and you're a brain genius all according to plan and everyone gives you points because you're so wise!!!! It's great!!!!!

Mahjong has long been one of those games where I'd say "I'll learn this someday" and never reeeeally actually try to learn, and I'm so glad I finally took the effort to because it's good as hell. And, truth be told, it wasn't THAT hard to learn? Like you can get to the point where I was where I didn't know the strategy fairly easily in my opinion, and once you do that It's just a matter of continuing to play to understand the rest. I highly recommended that you also go out and learn it if you similarly revel in getting that ass, it's so satisfying once you do.

Yakuza: Like a Dragon (PlayStation 4, 2020)

Ryu Ga Gotoku Studio took a big gamble with Yakuza: Like a Dragon. After seven games (more if you take spinoffs and remakes into consideration) they decided to focus on a new main character and, even more unexpectedly, they decided to change things up by turning the series into a turn-based JRPG. Their gamble paid off in spades. This is easily in my top 3 favorite Yakuza games.

The JRPG gameplay is surprisingly solid. There's definite room for improvement, but they nailed a bunch of it right out of the gate. Some mechanics are a little janky and I wish the job system was more fleshed out or just worked more like Final Fantasy V's, but they nailed one of the most important things and made the battles brisk and fun. It's a great foundation, especially for a team that's never attempted anything like this, and it's way more fun than the combat's been in any of the previous Dragon Engine games. I can't wait to see them iterate on it.

Everything else is top fuckin' notch. The music is great, the side content is fully fleshed out in a way it hasn't been since before they switched to the Dragon Engine, and I love the characters and story so much. Yakuza has a new main character in Ichiban Kasuga, and he's my son and I love him. Kiryu was great, and I love him too, but he was a bit of a passive protagonist. Stuff happened around him and he mostly just stoically reacted to it. Ichi is a much more active lead and it's great. He's a big lovable dope, and his tendency to keep an upbeat attitude and eagerness to leap into action is such a breath of fresh air. And it's not only Ichiban, since this is an RPG you have a whole party of characters and they're all great! Having them with you at all times bantering with each other and reacting to things is another great change of narrative pace, too. 

Yakuza: Like a Dragon just straight up rules. As someone who has historically not been too much of a fan of the Dragon Engine games, it's simultaneously a refreshing new take on the series and a fantastic return to form. I can't wait for what comes next. Wherever Ichiban goes, I go.

Moon: Remix RPG Adventure (Nintendo Switch, 2020)

After 23 years of Japanese PS1 exclusivity, Moon: Remix RPG Adventure finally got an English release this year for Nintendo Switch. I'm glad it did, because Moon isn't just the very definition of A Sebmal Game. It's the Sebmal Game missing link. In addition to being just a great video game, it helped me make a mental throughline for a bunch of games I love and a large part of my taste in video games.

To keep a long story short (seriously, I have a much much longer version of this saved in my drafts that I'll maybe finish someday), Moon turned out to be not the JRPG I assumed it was, given the title and basic story pitch, but a secret prequel to a game I love named Chulip. Moon's developer, Love-de-Lic, was formed by a handful of ex-Squaresoft employees, many of which worked on an extremely formative game I love named Super Mario RPG: Legend of the Seven Stars. Love-de-Lic broke up in the year 2000 and its staff went on to form a bunch of different studios that ended up making a BUNCH of different games I love like Chibi-Robo, Freshly-Picked Tingle's Rosy Rupeeland, Dandy Dungeon, and the aforementioned Chulip. These games, when you make the connection and line them up, all have a very distinct weirdness in common that makes perfect sense once you've realized many of the same people worked on them. Figuring this all out felt like snapping a piece of my brain back in place, and it was really crazy to come to understand exactly how much this studio that formed and disbanded decades before I'd even heard of them had impacted my tastes and, hell, my life.

So what is Moon, for those who don't innately understand what I mean by "a secret prequel to Chulip"? Moon is an adventure game where you explore a world with a day/night cycle, learn about that world's inhabitants, and eventually solve their problems. Think of it kind of like The Legend of Zelda: Majora's Mask, but if the sidequests were the entirety of the focus with no Groundhog Day time reset mechanic and none of the Zelda stuff like combat and dungeons. You play as a young boy who, after a late night JRPG binge session, is sucked into the world of the game he was just playing. Everything is off from the way it was portrayed while the boy was playing the game, though. The hero he had previously controlled is actually a silent menace, raiding peoples' houses for treasure and slaughtering every innocent animal that crosses his path in an endless quest for EXP. The townspeople seem more concerned with problems in their day-to-day lives than the supposed world threatening crisis outlined in the game's intro. It's up to you as the boy to investigate this world's mysteries, help the townsfolk, mend the damage the hero has done, and eventually restore love to a loveless world.

Speaking of love, I fucking loved Moon. I loved the story, I loved the characters, I loved the music, I loved the way it looks (even though the Switch port is a little crusty in that basic emulator-y kinda way), I loved how constantly bizarre and surprising and funny it was. Like I said earlier, it's the very definition of a game made for me. It was essentially the progenitor of a long line of games made for me, and of games potentially made for me but I don't know yet because I haven't played them due to not understanding Japanese (UFO: A Day in the Life translation next please? Anyone from Onion Games reading this??). For as similar as Moon and Chulip are in their systems and pacing, I think I might actually like Moon better despite it coming earlier? It's not as full force maximum impact absurd as Chulip is, but it is a lot more playable and less obtuse once you get a grip on the time limit mechanic. You don't need a full strategy guide included in the instruction manual for Moon, and you don't need to exchange business cards with every single character to get information vital to finishing the game either.

I truly cannot recommend Moon enough if your taste in games ventures anywhere off the beaten path. Maybe this is a little conceited of me, but I assume if you're reading this article, let alone this far down into it, you relate to my video game opinions at least a little bit? You should play Moon. Everyone reading this sentence should play Moon. Moon: Remix RPG Adventure is my game of the year for the year 2020.

These games were also cool, I just had less to say about them:

Death Stranding (PlayStation 4, 2019): Death Stranding, much like Metal Gear Solid V, was a game I enjoyed for the gameplay and not much else. The story, characters, and writing were a huge disappointment for me, but man if I didn't enjoy lugging those boxes around and setting up my hellish cross-continental goon summer camp lookin' zipline network. Mr. Driller Drill Land (Nintendo Switch, 2020): I am a known Mr. Driller Enjoyer, and I enjoyed this Mr. Driller. Originally released for the Gamecube, Mr. Driller Drill Land is another long-time Japanese exclusive that finally came stateside this year and it's packed with new and novel twists on the Mr. Driller format. It looks super sharp, the music's great (also the credits music is the most impossibly out of place and extra as hell shit in the world and it's hilarious), and it's just a good ass time. The main campaign is pretty damn short, but if you're a post-game content kinda guy it has that and it's all super hard. Tony Hawk's Pro Skater 1+2 (PlayStation 4, 2020): They finally made another good new Tony Hawk game, and all it took was perfectly remaking two of the best old Tony Hawk games! Plays exactly like you remember it with the added benefit of the best mechanics from up to THUG1, looks great, packed full of content, even has most of the music alongside some mostly crappy new stuff. It's the full package as is, but I do hope they end up adding THPS3 to it eventually. Mad Rat Dead (Nintendo Switch, 2020): Mad Rat Dead was a pleasant surprise that I only picked up because I saw a couple of people on my Twitter timeline constantly talking about it. A fun and inventive platformer where all your actions need to be on beat with the music. The gameplay feels great (aside from some not so great performance issues on Switch), the soundtrack is fun, and it's got a real good style to it. Demon's Souls (PlayStation 5, 2020): I love Demon's Souls and this is Demon's Souls. It plays exactly the same with some minor quality of life changes. I don't agree with many of the artistic changes, but there's no denying it looks incredible on a technical level. If you want to play Demon's Souls again or for the first time, this is a perfectly valid and fun way to do so. Groove Coaster: Wai Wai Party!!!! (Nintendo Switch, 2019): Groove Coaster is one of my favorite rhythm games, and they finally made an acceptable at-home version with Wai Wai Party. It's not a perfect replication of the arcade game control-wise, I have some issues with the song choices, and the pricing is frankly fucking ridiculous if you're not a Groove Coaster maniac like I am, but the same ultra satisfying gameplay is all there. You can even play it vertically in handheld mode! Flip Griiiiiiiip!

And we're done! Phew! Honestly didn't realize I played that many good games until I typed all this out. Thanks as always for reading this far. I'm gonna try and get back to regularly posting Breviews this year at the very least. Honestly don't know if I'll get anything else up on here, but we'll see. Here's to hoping 2021 is a little bit less of a nightmare!

[clumsyclifford]

For prompt thingy you just posted bc we keep talking about diva!Luke, Lashton with #58

ok yes i know you said diva luke but for some reason no matter how i tried to write this it just ended up with ashton saying it HOWEVER i did write it in the fairytale au ‘verse so ! i hope i didn’t mangle your au thank u

-

Okay. In all honesty, the crystals are fake.

They have real magical crystals, in the back, but those are on request only, because, as Michael and Luke had learned the hard way, some people don’t know how to be responsible with genuine magic items. So they keep the real magical crystals under wraps and in careful storage, and out front all they’ve got are — well, they’re basically glorified rocks. A lot of them are literally glorified rocks. Luke’s in charge of picking decent-looking stones from the ocean floor and glamming them up into something a little prettier. He’s a big fan of pretty things.

Also of pretty people. And pretty werewolves, like Ashton.

Before Ashton, Luke hadn’t even known pretty werewolves existed. He hadn’t really thought a werewolf could be considered pretty. But Ashton is undeniably pretty, in a very scruffy kind of way, and from the moment he steps foot into the magic shop for the first time, roving eyes landing first on the rack of colorful candles and then onto Luke, Luke had been gone.

Since Ashton introduced himself that first day, with a friendly but vaguely wolfish smile that showed only the tips of his canines, Luke has started to look forward to his visits. Not only does he enjoy Ashton’s company and commentary, he also very much appreciates the distraction from annoyingly persistent customers.

“Hey!” Luke cheers, as the chimes over the door twinkle. Ashton enters and meets Luke’s eyes. His face seems to brighten, just seeing Luke. It might just be the lighting in the shop, but Luke blushes anyway. 

“Excuse me,” says the woman standing at the counter. Luke sighs and returns his attention to the customer. “I’m asking if I can see the real crystals!”

“Ma’am, if I’ve told you once I’ve told you a hundred times,” he says impatiently. “The real crystals are for magic-users only.”

“And if I’ve told you once or a hundred times, I am a magic user!”

“Tarot reading unfortunately doesn’t fall under the magic umbrella necessary to access the crystals. I’m sorry.” As if they haven’t had this exact fucking conversation before. Ashton makes an apologetic face, and while the woman rummages around in her bag, Luke mouths save me! Ashton frowns, then walks behind one of the shelves towards the back. Luke stares after him. If Ashton’s planning to help, he won’t do much good in the crystal ball section. Unless he intends to knock them all down, in which case Luke will kick his ass.

“You know,” the woman says, throwing her tarot deck onto the counter, “I saw this conversation happening. In the cards. And do you know what I drew when I asked how you would respond? Death.”

Luke resists the urge to roll his eyes. “I’m sorry to hear that,” he says, even though the death card doesn’t mean what this lady obviously thinks it means. Suddenly, there’s a dull thud, and Luke hears Ashton exclaim, “Oh, my ankle! I think it must be broken! Can somebody help me?”

Thank fuck, Luke thinks, and gives the woman his best apologetic smile. “So sorry, ma’am, this is an emergency.” He races around the counter towards where Ashton is. Hidden from view by the shelf, he’s sitting cross-legged on the floor, looking very pleased with himself.

“Pretend you’re actually injured, you idiot,” Luke whispers. Ashton grimaces.

“Ow! I’m in so much pain! I need to get home, stat.”

“I’ll help you,” Luke says loudly, putting an arm around Ashton and helping to heave him towards the door. “Michael! I’m taking this injured customer to the emergency room! Or, um, something like that.”

“You’re what?” comes Michael’s shouted reply, but the tarot woman is giving Luke suspicious looks, so Luke can’t really respond. 

“Sorry,” he tells her. “Come back another time?” Or don’t. That’d be good, if you didn’t. He hauls Ashton, who’s making halfhearted howling noises, through the door, and pretends to help him until they’re out of sight of anyone inside the magic shop.

“You’re the worst liar ever,” Luke complains once they’re out of the woods.

Ashton makes an offended noise. “I did you a favor!”

“Michael’s gonna be mad at me.” Luke shrugs. “Oh well.”

“That lady was annoying, though,” Ashton says, shuddering. “I’m so glad I don’t work in retail.”

Luke huffs. “Shut up.”

“So now that you’re free, where are we going?” Ashton asks. 

Luke’s feet have already started instinctively taking him home, so he says, “Feel like going swimming?”

“You’re such a one-trick pony,” Ashton says, although he’s smiling.

“I’ll find you a sand dollar,” Luke promises. The first time he’d given Ashton a sand dollar he’d worried Ashton would find it silly or trivial, but Ashton’s grin had gotten so wide Luke thought it would split his face open, and he’d loudly proclaimed the gift to be his favorite he’d ever received. Somehow, though Luke really kind of is a one-trick pony, Ashton’s enthusiasm hasn’t waned. “Or a pearl, maybe.”

Ashton sucks in a delighted breath. “You can find those?”

If he can’t find them, he can probably make them, but Ashton doesn’t need to know that. “Yeah,” he says. “This may surprise you, but I’m pretty good at navigating the sea.”

“Oh, fuck off,” Ashton says as they reach the water’s edge. This close to home, Luke can feel the pull, the very gentle lilt of the waves lapping at the shore mixed with the sun glancing off the water. It’s music, all of it. Luke doesn’t think Ashton hears it, but Ashton has a sort of reverence on his face anyway, and somehow, that makes Luke like him more.

(Not that Luke needs to like him more.)

He dives smoothly into the water and shakes the magic off his legs until all that’s left is his tail, and then he swishes it a couple times to get the feeling back. This transition is always kind of weird, but Luke’s gotten much better at it.

“Are you coming in?” he asks.

Ashton hums lowly. “Do you want me to come in?”

Luke turns pink. “Um. I don’t, like…I don’t want to force you or anything. Obviously. I know it’s — swimming comes easier to me, like, of course, so — but if you want to? Yes? Sure?”

Ashton chuckles. “That was a really long-winded way of saying yes,” he says, toeing off his shoes and cuffing his jeans. “Some siren you are.”

“I’m not a siren,” Luke protests.

“Yeah, I can see why.”

“Hey!”

“Don’t worry,” Ashton says reassuringly, and before Luke can react he jumps into the water, splashing Luke and everything around him. When he surfaces, he says, “You still charm me.”

Luke feels warm despite the cold of the water, and doesn’t stop smiling even when Ashton splashes him.

[botwstoriesandsuch]

Day 5 of Revalink: Truth

Did I post these out of order? Yes, yes I did, because I suck at writing quickly. Nonetheless, today I bring to you a collab with one of my friends @xcookix 

This is the part 2 of a little fic, he wrote part one here so read his first if you want to understand whats going on in this one!

Anyhow, enjoy!

- - - - - 

A part of me longs to see him

A part of me dreads it.

Link got off his horse, boots falling onto the grass and dry pine needles that surrounded Rito Stable. The Princess’ hair whipped wildly, the breeze crisp and cutting. Even his own blond hair was barely being tied together. Zelda, quill in hand, was scratching away in her journal, jotting down some unseen royal notes before turning abruptly to Link. “Alright then, you can just escort me up until we reach the elder’s house. I just have to discuss a few things with him for the day, so you can go off and do whatever it is you do in your spare time.” The knight held up his hands to sign, confused.

‘Shouldn’t I still be there? I can just stand in the corner or something.’

 “Oh please, you and I both know that the last time you listened in on these kinds of meetings you practically fell asleep. When we were at the Domain you literally asked for a pillow!” Zelda exclaimed, rolling her eyes.

He shrugged, ‘They were cool! Both literally and figuratively.’

The princess let out a scoff, “I would have thought you would have been excited at the chance to run off. Considering we’re so close to you-know-who again.”

Walking towards the wooden bridges, Link shook his head. 

‘No, I am definitely not excited about that.’ He clenched his fists tightly. ‘Revali probably doesn’t want to see me either.’

Zelda paused and cast him a curious glance. “Why’s that? Oh no, did something happen between the two of you?” 

A frown crossed Link’s face as he thought back to that day at the castle. He thought back to how he had opened up to Urbosa. He recalled how shaky and frustrated he had been, how he vented about his frustrations without restraint, how he had talked about his exasperation about his relationship with Revali, and all of his faults, how he…

Link let out a deep sigh. 

He remembered how before he could finish his last sentence, he felt a rush of air from around the corner, and the faintest streak of blue from the corner of his eye. A shade of blue he knew all too well.

Revali had heard everything. At best, he heard everything, at worst, he only heard the bad parts. Either way, he probably hated him even more for it.

Zelda broke into his thoughts. “Link, do you not have those feelings for him anymore?”

‘No, I do, I just—’

“Did he do something wrong?”

‘No! I mean, maybe? No, it’s not really him. It’s nothing, not a big deal really.’

“So, you don’t want to see him?”

‘I do! I mean, I want to but I just think—’

“I thought you told me that—”

“I KNOW!”

They both blinked, startled at his sudden outburst. The princess looked at the ground, embarrassed. She hadn’t realized the situation was so serious that it even brought Link out of his silent oath. After a beat, Link started to sign again. 

‘I know that I said I liked him and all, but something happened. I am almost positive that he hates me now. So I don’t think it’s wise for me to see him…’

They continued on their path as they made their way up the stairs, passing through the bustling Rito. Finally, they arrived at the Elder's abode. Zelda turned to Link once more. “To reiterate, you aren’t staying here.” He nodded. “Maybe you can just walk around for a bit. I’m sure Revali is at the Flight Range, per usual, so you won’t run into him if you just stay around here.” He nodded again. Another pause. Link took the silence as a cue to start leaving. Then Zelda called out.

“I still hope you can sort out whatever confusion you’re going through. It seems to me you really care for him, afterall…”

- - - - - 

The view was nice enough, except for the constant whipping of wind. The clouds merged into silver and murky grey strokes, and a snow storm seemed to be forming along the Hebra Mountains. The wooden landing creaked from Link’s weight, as he lay his crossed arms across the railing.  

He had been out here for the last thirty minutes, watching the wind rush through the pine trees. Every now and then, he’d fix his hair as it flew into his face— the simple ponytail his blond hair was in wasn’t cutting it in these conditions.

The said wind started to pick up again and, instinctively, Link started to run his fingers against the flying strands of hair. However, this time, the wind was rising from under him. He didn’t notice it at first, but after it started to swirl in large gusts and pick up in speed, his blue eyes suddenly shot up in realization.

Wait! He’s back? Link thought, frantically.  

He started to move himself away from the railing, ready to start heading towards the stairs, but he hesitated, for just a moment, wondering to himself if he should stay. 

Then, it was too late, and a familiar blue streak shot through the air. 

Link held an arm in front of his face, covering himself from the rushing winds. After another moment, it stopped, and Revali landed and perched himself on the railing. 

What would he say? Probably something along the lines of, “The Hylian Champion? So deterred by a few gusts of air?” Followed by something like, “As expected, considering my ability requires an unprecedented amount of strength and concentration. Nonetheless, one would assume such an important figure such as yourself would be more resilient.” Yeah, and he would follow it up with a quip with how messy his hair was, or something about his skill or—

“It’s been a while, hasn’t it.”

Link could only stand there, unsure of what to say. After a moment, all he could bring himself to sign was:

‘Yeah, I guess it has.’

Not like he had been counting the days or anything. 

There was a gentle look in Revali’s jade eyes, something Link couldn’t quite place. Not only was it weird to start off a conversation with Revali so...naturally, but the fact that he was just standing there, quietly, well it was new to say the least.

“Your hair’s a mess,” Revali said, softly.

Link chuckled to himself. At least this was slightly familiar.

‘Yeah, I know. It’s the wind up here. It keeps…’

He let his arms fall, as he looked at Revali, curiously. The Rito was shuffling through a satchel on his waist, focused on finding some unseen item.

“Now don’t go blaming the forces of nature for your irresponsibility. You’ve been here plenty times before and still haven’t developed any foresight? Ugh, where is my gi— Aha!”

From his satchel, he pulled out two long pieces of thin fabric, an emerald green in color. 

Hair ribbons.

Revali smirked at the look on Link’s face. Holding them out, they danced and fluttered in the wind for a moment. “These should do nicely. If you’re capable of braiding them correctly, it should keep that monstrosity that you call a haircut at bay.”

He stepped off the railing and offered them to him. “And...I suppose the colors work well with your little golden head. The coincidence works out in your favour I guess.” 

Link took them, and held them in one hand. Then he looked up. 

‘So what are you doing here? Weren't you busy at the flight range?’

The Rito shrugged. “Was practicing with bomb arrows today. So I needed to get some new targets.”

Ah, so that was the reason. Nothing else, huh… Link thought to himself.

‘Oh, well, don’t let me keep you. You go on ahead, I’m just waiting for the princess to finish up some stuff,’ he signed, gesturing towards the wooden stairs. 

Revali’s eyes seemed to narrow for a moment, an assortment of words seemed to bounce around in his head, but he said nothing. After an uncomfortable silence, he sighed and started walking.

“Right, I’ll do that, then.” 

He started walking towards the stairs. Link continued to stand there in silence. More thoughts started to rush through his head. What am I doing? Who knows when the next we’re going to speak. I should be apologizing! For everything! Or at least thanking him for these ribbons. I should have kept up the conversation! What am I doing?? I’m such an idiot, I just need to— 

“Revali, wait!”

At the sound of his voice, Revali immediately whipped around to face him, a new glimmer in his eyes. Link let out a huff of air. 

“No need to act surprised. We both know you were there that day.” The Rito just stared at him. Then, Link raised an eyebrow. “Although, I’m a bit surprised you reacted so quickly to my voice.” I would have thought he would have at least taken a moment to recognize it...

Revali strode towards him, and as if reading his mind, he clicked his tongue. “I haven’t forgotten the sound of your voice ever since that day. I remember it quite well, so if a shocked face is what you were after, then I’m terribly sorry to disappoint.”

The two stared at each other, Link’s hand still clenched around the hair ribbons. Looking up at the Rito, he could see the reflection of his own face in his eyes. Finally, he took a deep breath. 

“I just...I just wanted to say I was sorry.”

The tension in his shoulders seemed to relax.

“All those bad remarks I made about you...I’m not sure how much you heard...but you have to know none of that was true. I really do respect and admire you, Revali, I think… I was just stressed out that day, so I hope you know that I’m really, really sorry and I regret it fully.”

Another silence. Link tensed himself, ready for some harsh rebuttal.

Then, Revali let out a laugh. A loud, boastful, beautiful laugh. He let it echo out for a few seconds. “You really are a fool if you think you are the one who needs to apologize in this scenario.”

“Revali you don’t—” he began, starting to protest.

“Ashhshhshhshh!” He exclaimed, holding up a feather to silence him, “You’ve decided to remain quiet throughout our entire relationship, what’s five more minutes?”

Link looked away, his cheeks rosening, embarrassed. The Rito straightened his scarf. 

“Now then, concerning our aforementioned scene at the castle, I did happen to hear quite a few things from you. As you have said, I heard your comments about me, and the fact that you failed to mention that you had the ability to communicate verbally.

“I won’t push for details. I can only assume it has something to do with the whole stoic demeanor you attempt to keep up at every waking hour of the day. However, something you said did...stick with me.”

He turned his back and paced across the landing. “If I recall correctly, it was something about ‘seeing good’ in me. Now I don’t know what led you to that conclusion, but obviously you’re mistaken. Everyone can see good in me, considering I am the best at my craft. Sure, I recognize that my comments about you might have stung, or that sometimes my unwavering confidence can be...prickly, towards you.

“But of course it’s not my fault that you took those comments so personally, or that you decided that your best course of action was to avoid me for so long. And it’s not my fault that you’re...” 

He snuck a glance at Link’s face. Revali let the confidence in his posture fall.

“No...no, none of that’s not true. This whole thing is, in a more significant portion, my fault.”

Link shook his head. “Revali, I’m the one who was so butt hurt about the quality of our relationship, and then turned around and kept a secret from you for so long.”

“Well, it’s at the very least half my fault, for lying to you.”

Link raised an eyebrow. “About what?”

“About a lot of things. Every single one of those comments about your hair and your face and skill and whatnot...though, not everything. I do despise you to be clear. I despise your unwavering strength and strong will. I despise your courage and generosity. I despise the way your stupid blue eyes light up when you look at something in fondness.”

Link could only stare at him, his blue eyes glistening. 

Revali let out a huff. “Yes! Exactly! Like that, why do you keep doing that around me? Even when I’m trying to open up, you keep acting all cute like this. Stop it, stop it!” Link held up his arms in surrender, the sliver of a smile creeping onto his face. Revali let out a sigh and continued.

“Now, most of all I despise the way you make me feel. We’re supposed to be these great accomplished Champions, correct? How am I supposed to fulfill that role when I’m thinking about you all the time? I hate that I’m too much of a coward to actually confront you about this sooner. I wished I did do this sooner, because now…”

He made a motion with his wing, gesturing to the space between them.

“Now, I’ve made it weird. It wouldn’t be too far fetched to say I’ve ruined it. In my haste to preserve my foolish pride, I hurt you, and I’m sorry.”

The final silence sat between them. 

Seeing Link fail to respond or react, he sighed, “I completely understand if these...feelings aren’t mutual. It’s only natural that after everything I’ve—”

Suddenly, Link shot up and wrapped his arms around him, pressing his lips against the tip of his beak. 

After a moment, he let go, and held out his arms to sign.

‘Apology accepted.’

The feathers on Revali’s neck started to floof up. “What in Hylia’s name was that?? You really are an idiot, you can’t just do that to people out of the blue.”

Link could only smile. ‘I don’t just do it out of the blue, I’ve been saving it for you.’

His cheeks flushed, and if Revali didn’t have any feathers they probably would have been blushing together. Finally, Link held out the hair ribbons.

‘Why don’t you help me with these then, as a further apology?’

Revali scoffed, but complied, too elated to think of any interesting quips

Looking to the side as Revali started to braid the ribbons into his hair, Link sighed. ‘The color does match really well’

Revali scoffed. “Of course, I’m never wrong.”

[stariousfalls]

A/N: Had a conversation with a friend (@fallen-gravity) over different canon divergence situations in Gravity Falls, and felt determined to write something angsty. I miss Gravity Falls a lot, haha.

Characters: Mabel Pines, Dipper Pines, Ford Pines, Bill Cipher

Word Count: ~2500

Summary: Canon Divergence of DAMVTF where Mabel decides to not give the rift to Bill and runs off. And Bill angrily goes after her, not wanting to miss the chance of taking over the dimension.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

A choked sob escaped through her trembling hands as she tried to keep herself quiet.

Would he find her? What would happen when he found her?

She didn’t want to find out the answer to either question. Mabel wished she were back at the shack, talking it out with Dipper and making up with him. She didn’t care if her twin would continue to explain to her why he’d decided to take on an apprenticeship with Ford – she just desperately wanted out of this stressful game of cat and mouse.

She wondered why Bill had gone delirious over some strange ‘makeshift snow globe’ in her brother’s backpack, but whatever the reason was she ran like a bat out of hell. Ran as far as her legs could take her, until they trembled out of control from both fear and fatigue.

Whatever sick intention it was all for, Mabel knew it wasn’t good. The fact that Bill had literally possessed her brother’s body to try and get what he wanted made her question all the more. Something linked to Ford, she assumed. It was difficult for her to come up with an exact reason, as her brother and grunkle never shared any information with her and kept to themselves. So, she was left to fend for herself over an item she didn’t even know the purpose of – other than it being important to Bill.  

Mabel continued sitting in place to recollect herself. She wished she could’ve been a part of the loop with Dipper, then maybe things wouldn’t have turned out this way; being hunted down by a literal demon.

She had no idea how much time had passed before she heard soft static coming from the backpack.

“Mabel?”

Mabel’s heart fluttered sporadically in her chest.

“D-Dipper?” She choked out softly.

“Mabel, where are you? Mabel!”

She immediately rummaged through the bag and pulled out a walkie talkie – the source of the noise.

“Dipper…” Mabel repeated hoarsely into the device, tears threatening to fall from her eyes.

“Mabel! Where – “

She heard something snap nearby and panicked, quickly pressing the speak button to silence his rambling. In any other situation Mabel would be floored to hear Dipper’s voice, but under these circumstances she didn’t want to be found. Her body shook uncontrollably at the thought of Bill finding her.

She took a deep, shaky breath before responding. “D-Dipper…I can’t talk right now, I-I – “

“Mabel, I’m so sorry about what I said earlier! Please come back to the shack! We can work things out, I – “

The young girl released a quivering sob at the sound of his frantic pleas over the intercom. She inwardly pleaded with her brother that he’d get the hint and stop his attempts of trying to reach her.

“Dipper, please!” Mabel softly cried, heartrate spiking at the thought of Bill picking up on her location. “I-I can’t come back to the shack right now.”

“Mabel, where are you? If you refuse to come back, I’m coming to get you!”

The sound of footsteps trekked close. Mabel’s breath hitched in her throat as she fumbled with the talking device, trying to desperately turn it off. She continued to tremble in fear.

Was Bill nearby? Had she given away her whereabouts? Or was she just imagining things?

“Mabel!”

She whimpered.

“W-What do I do?” She asked herself, tears streaming down her face.

The only thing her instincts manage to scream at her was; keep running.

Mabel tightened her grip on the walkie talkie and bolted out of her hiding spot, unintentionally leaving the backpack behind. She didn’t dare to look back when she heard something picking up speed behind her like some wild animal chasing its prey.

She hoped she still had enough energy left to outrun him.

“Mabel, you need to tell us where you are, please.”

Her eyes widened. “Grunkle Ford?” She whispered in reply, briefly glancing down to the device.

“I-I don’t…I don’t know where I am!” She wailed out between breaths, finally glancing back to see a pair of wild, glowing yellow eyes staring her down. “Help me!! Dipper! Grunkle Stan!! Grunkle Ford – “

Mabel yelped like a kicked puppy when she tripped over a root, plummeting to the cold ground.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Ford picked up on Mabel’s erratic behavior when Dipper tried to communicate with her. She sounded quiet, shaky, and in a way…desperate? She refused to come back to shack, which he at first understood with her being upset. However, a part of him told him – something was wrong. Normally a child would be more vocal when being stubborn and distressed. This didn’t appear to be the case with Mabel. A bad feeling pooled in the pit of his stomach.

He eventually pried the walkie talkie out of his grand-nephew’s hands to try and speak with her.

“Mabel, you need to tell us where you are, please.” He pleaded into the intercom.

“Grunkle Ford?”

Her hoarse voice pulled at Ford’s heartstrings. Something was definitely wrong.

“I-I don’t…I don’t know where I am! Help me!! Dipper! Grunkle Stan!! Grunkle Ford – ”

Frantic thoughts flooded Ford’s mind at the sound of his grand-niece’s screaming and sobbing. She sounded like she was in immense pain. His grip tightened on the walkie talkie. What happened to her?

A familiar maniacal laugh rung out of the device’s speaker.

“You’re too late, Sixer!”

Ford instantly felt his blood run cold. It’s like he knew he was there on the other line.

“Leave her alone, Cipher!” He spat out, anger boiling over the fear at the thought of Bill tormenting his grand-niece.

Ford hears a mix between sobs of agony and irritable growls spewing out of the walkie talkie. What was going on? He waited for Bill to bite back, gloating over the fact that the fate of the universe was now within his grasp. However, what he wasn’t expecting was a threat.

“The clocks ticking, Ford. Be here in an hour or Shooting Star won’t live to see another day. Don’t keep me waiting.”

Ford hightailed it into the woods without a second thought, with Dipper not far behind him. He sure as hell didn’t know where Mabel was being held at Bill’s mercy, but that wasn’t going to stop him from finding her in time. He was a man of science, but that didn’t deter him from desperately pleading to any godly entity out there to spare his grand-niece’s life while he rushed through the underbrush of the forest.

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Mabel screamed when Bill roughly yanked her body off the ground by her hair.

“No! Let me go!!” Mabel shrieked in horror, trying to wriggle herself out of his grasp.

Maniacal laughter bubbled out of the mouth of the body he possessed, eyes gleaming with glee. He picked up the walkie talkie off the ground with a snicker.

“You’re too late, Sixer!” He mocked into device, grin widening at the thought of Ford’s horror-struck face.

“Leave her alone, Cipher!”

Before he had the chance to rub his victory further into Ford’s face, he realized (upon further inspection) that the rift was nowhere to be found. His grip tightened around the child’s hair, knuckles turning white.

Mabel cried out in pain when she felt a violent tug at her hair.

“Where’s the rift, Shooting Star?!” He snarled angrily at her.

She could only begin to tremble and sob in response to the yelling and the rough treatment.

Bill let out an irritable growl into the walkie talkie. “The clocks ticking, Ford. Be here in an hour or Shooting Star won’t live to see another day. Don’t keep me waiting.”

“Dipper...” she choked out before succumbing to the pain, body going limp.

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How long had they been running for? Ford had no idea, but the burning in his legs told him he’d probably been doing so for a while now. His mind screamed at him to keep going, but his body told him otherwise – giving out on him, causing him to stagger down to the ground briefly to catch his breath. All the injuries and strain he endured from earlier were catching up to him.

Damn this accursed old body, he thought to himself.

Dipper in the meantime paced back and forth in front of Ford, distressing over the thought of never finding his sister and assuming the worst. A wave of overwhelming guilt washed over him and his breaths came out short and frantic.

“This is all my fault! I should’ve talked to Mabel about everything before making any decisions. I didn’t even consider Mabel’s feelings, I – “

“No, Dipper,” Ford’s voice is soft, almost childlike. “The blame should all be on me. I’m the one who was the initial cause of all this mess. If it wasn’t for me making the mistake of trusting Bill decades ago, none of this would be happening.”

He noticed the forest around them getting darker. The sun was going down. They were running out of time.

“We need to keep going in order to find Mabel.”

They continue on in a jog, the fastest speed that Ford was capable of at the moment. The paranoia and adrenaline fueled him, pushing him forward.

That was until he heard a piercing cry echo through the woods.

“Time’s almost up, Ford!” Bill’s cutthroat voice rang.

Thank God they were nearby. Before Ford had the chance to say anything else Dipper bolted in the direction of his sister’s scream.

“Dipper!”

Ford followed his grand-nephew.

When they finally catch up to Mabel, they find her trying to wriggle free from her captor – eyes flashing menacingly down at her. Ford felt a cold shiver run down his spine when he made eye contact with the man that Bill currently possessed.

Bill let go of Mabel with a poised shrug. “Took you long enough, Sixer. You’re lucky I’m in such a good mood today – with me being on the brink of taking over your dimension!” He sneered, taking immense satisfaction in the looks of shock on Ford’s and Pine Tree’s faces. “I can’t thank you enough for holding onto your resentment towards your brother and tearing your family apart!”

Before Mabel had the chance to get away, Bill took hold of her hair once more and forcefully yanked her like a rag doll down onto the ground. She squeaked in agony when he rammed his foot onto her back, anchoring her body against the earth.

“Now that we’re all comfortable – where’s the rift?”

“What?” Dipper asked.

The boy twin flinched at the sound of a metal click. Dipper watched Bill aim a loaded gun right at his sister’s head in horror. That surely got his full attention.

“Let me ask again. Now that I have your attention,” Bill growled, slightly pulling back on the trigger. “Where’s the rift?”

Dipper must’ve hesitated too long for Bill’s sanity. His patience grew thinner and thinner by every second and began to count down. He’d gotten this far, and he wasn’t going to throw away the golden opportunity at taking over this dimension.

“Five!”

“We can’t!”

“Four!”

“We don’t have it!”

“LIARS! THREE!”

“Bill! Leave her out of this!!” Ford bellowed.

“TWO!”

“We’re not lying!” Dipper cried out desperately, tears streaming down his face. “I swear we don’t have it! Don’t hurt my sister! Please, I’m begging you!”

“ONE – “

“I-I left it behind! I didn’t do it on purpose, but I-I must’ve left it where I was hiding nearby – “

Mabel went silent when she heard the abrupt gunshot and watched her life flash before her eyes. Without breaking eye contact with Ford, Bill gestured out in the direction he chased Mabel in earlier before pointing the gun back to her head.

“Find it.”

-------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Moments later the two come rushing back, rift in tow and willing to hand over. They weren’t going to take any chances trying to reason with a maniacal demon that held Mabel at gunpoint. As much as Ford didn’t want Bill taking over their dimension, the lives of the kids were more important.

“Hand over the rift, Ford – or say goodbye to your niece.”

Ford didn’t hesitate. Even if the world came to an end, he wouldn’t be able to live with himself if he were the one to cause his grand-niece’s early demise. Despite becoming the bringer of the apocalypse, he’d do anything to keep the kids safe. Whether he had the kids go into hiding with Stan for the rest of their lives or figure out a way to fix the problems he inadvertently caused. He’d do whatever it takes.

The guilt will reside in him for the rest of his life over every mistake he made that led up to this moment.

“Under one condition.” Ford narrowed his eyes. “You let Mabel go and leave the kids alone.”

Bill’s grin returned. “Fine.”

Ford shamefully handed over the rift without a second thought. The demon’s grin widened in glee, reveling in the feel of victory as his fingers drummed over the cracked glass of the containment unit.

“Now let her go, Cipher.” He growled.

Mabel immediately bolted towards her family the moment Bill lifted his weight off of her, desperate to get away from danger. Ford watched her run in his direction and kneeled down to catch her in his arms.

His hold on her tightened when he heard Mabel start to sob into his chest. Out of all the mistakes he made, he deeply regretted keeping his secrets away from Mabel. He only wanted to keep her and Stan safe (even though he wouldn’t admit it to him personally), assuming they didn’t have any interest in his past or what he was caught up in. He was a fool. Stan may not have been aware of Bill Cipher but looking back he remembered; Mabel already had history with him just like Dipper.

Man, he was such an utter fool.

The sentimental moment was interrupted at the sound of something shattering and distorted laughter. Ford’s breath hitched in fear. This was it. The end of the world, and his family had a front row seat to witness it.

Ford flinched when he felt something tug at his coat, and saw Dipper gravitating over to him. All they could do was hopelessly watch Bill bring forth the apocalypse.

“At last! At long, long last! The gateway between worlds has opened! The event one billion years prophesized has finally come to pass! The day has come! The world is finally mine!” Bill laughed maniacally as the unconfined rift teared reality into the Nightmare Realm.

With a gesture of his hand Bill used his powers to forcefully rip Mabel out of her grunkle’s grasp. Ford watched her body glow pink and float away from him in horror.

“No!”

“Dipper! Grunkle Ford!”

With a snap of a finger Mabel went unconscious, continuing to be whisked away. In an instant her body was surrounded by some strange pink bubble etched with a shooting star symbol and chains, and with another snap of the demon’s fingers she was gone.

Trying to process what just happened and witnessing his sister’s disappearance right before his eyes, he could only cry out in despair and frustration.

“Mabel!”

[minhothebighoe]

2:03 pm I Love You

Requested: yes: “Hey babes, hope your doing swell❤ What about Felix ( stray kids ) with a self conscious s/o? Like, she just doesn't thing she's good enough for him + so he hard core comforts her. Cuddles her until she gives up type thing. Possibly smut but if you don't write smut for him just fluff is fine.”

Word Count: 3.1 k

Summary: Your relationship with Felix was great at first, but when you two got caught in public it changed your life for the worst.

Warnings: mentions of feeling depressed, mentions of sex, small amounts of smut (just don’t blink), a mention of degradation kink (AGAIN DONT BLINK). And a cute/ sexy Felix

**also I haven’t proofread yet so hope it’s not too bad lololol, also maybe pt. 2 ???***

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“Babe please tell me what’s wrong”

Felix sighed deeply, before laying a hand on my bare shoulder, gripping tightly at the exposed skin that poked out of my sweater. He looked and concentrated on me with worry and sadness that was clearly displaying on his soft features; his eyes showing nothing but pure and utter remorse. I turned away and stared at the floor silently with pure guilt and anxiety that was building and starting to weigh heavily on my chest. I hated myself for the fact that I was the one causing him to feel this way.

Things have been shitty for a while now, and I’m not talking about Felix or anything about him. Felix is literally the light of my life, and it’s not an understatement when I say I would literally take a bullet for the boy or give up my life to save his. Everything that is wrong is because of me, myself, and I.

Things were more than amazing in the beginning when no one knew of us together. When Felix could visit or hang out we would mostly just Sneak around and hide the fact we were an item. It was definitely hard most times,especially for him; he wanted nothing more than to show me off to the world, but at the same time it was oh so exciting. Even though Felix wanted to come out to the world as more than close friends he also loved concealing our relationship. He being the dirty Aussie boy he is admittedly ached to fuck me in public anywhere that he could get his hands on me, and shit, it was our dirty little secret.

However, things mostly took a toll for the worst when dispatch caught us together, and stays all over found out about the relationship.

It was late at night, Felix and I were at a park close to my home, and me being the dumb ass I am, was not thinking coherently. All I was thinking of was the lovely night me and my beautiful boyfriend were having, and the fact that he was physically there with me. At no time did it occur to me to think that other people would be up at the god awful hour.

In the moment, Felix was chasing me on the open grass field, and we were both happy and content. We didn’t need much more than each other to have a good time or have fun.

“You’ll never catch me!” I laughed, running faster away from my playful boyfriend who was right on my tail. I however, knew for fucking sure he was definitely gonna get me, I just wanted to tease the poor lad and get him all worked up.

Not even 10 seconds later he caught a hold of my hand and before I knew it, we both came to a dead halt. I turned around to face him and capture him at the moment, it almost felt like one of those cheesy kdrama moments where everything is in slow motion. His beautiful dark eyes stared lovingly and deep into my own. His chest was heaving up and down and all I could hear was the sound of his heavy breaths parting from those big beautiful pouty lips. He leaned his forehead onto mine before speaking with that sinful voice of his,

“God you have no idea what the fuck you do to me.”

That beautiful playful smile was now a wicked and sexy smirk, and god did I love it.

He pulled me closer to where my chest was touching his long lean frame; I felt his hands slowly travel and make their way down to my hips, it was almost teasingly unhurried. I felt a soft squeeze on the flesh, and a painful chill make its way up throughout my body. I thought I forgot how to breathe at that very moment.

Meanwhile felix’s eyes had never left mine, causing a certain feeling make its way through out my core deep within. I was aching for him to touch me, and I could tell he couldn’t wait any longer as well.

God you have no idea what you do to me, Felix.

He continued to smirk at me before impulsively bringing his lips down to my neck with such vigor and pure lust. I brought my hands instantly from his chest and placed them at the back of his head running them through and tugging on his sexy red locks. I gasped for air as I felt his teeth nip slightly at my flesh, hitting that sweet spot just right below my earlobe. He slowly proceeded to run his tongue over the bite mark before sucking ever so mercilessly. I could feel the heat rapidly making a pool in my underwear, and I didn’t know how much longer I could wait for him to touch me.

“F-Felix please.” I pleaded.

He detached his lips from my neck, and I could instantly feel a cool breeze attack the spot where his mouth once was.

He stared devilishly at me, his pupils getting blacker, before speaking

“Awe is my baby girl getting impatient…. don’t worry darling I’ll fuck you right.” I gulped; He leaned in again, and I could feel his hot breath hit the inside of my ear causing goosebumps to arise and my complexion go pale.

“I just wanna play with you first.”

I stared at Felix as my mouth went dry and my mind buzzed. His words alone were enough to get me off, and all I wanted was for him to rip my skirt off and fuck me right then and there.

But Then…..that’s when I heard it.

**click**

I snapped out of the trance like state, and forcefully pulled myself away from Felix’s body. I automatically knew exactly what that sound was and it was almost an instant shock of anxiety that rolled throughout my body. I looked over to Felix and I could tell he felt the exact same way.

“C’mon babe we have to go.” Even though he was trying to rush me, he said it as calminglyas possible.

** click **

As we moved quicker away, the more rapid the noise was becoming. Felix and I moved speedily, giving even Usain Bolt a run for his money, trying to get away from the situation. However, we both knew it was too late and the damage was most likely done. We were already caught and red handed at that.

“People are going to find out” I thought, anxiety filled my entire being with the thought. What will they think? This wasn’t no ordinary fan base I was going up against, these are kpop stans the most frightening yet loyal fans to ever exist. They were going to completely and utterly judge me.

and that they did.

-

It had only been 1 month since the pictures had come out of Felix and I embracing each other at the park, and let’s just say the backlash was worse than what I was expecting. Each day was more shoddy than the last, it seemed as each hour passed the more shit I was getting and the more comments filled my Social media telling me I wasn’t good enough, or that I was too ugly, too fat, and so on. At first it didn’t really bother me, I had hoped changing my profiles to private would help, and get people to calm down about the situation, and it did for a while. However me being me, I couldn’t help myself to search and see what the fans were saying,and as much as I wanted to ignore it, I couldn’t fucking do it.

“Ugly bitch, Felix deserves so much better.”

ugh.

“Where the hell did he find her? Probably some whore.”

Woah.

“Fat ugly bitch should lose some weight, she’s going to crush our poor Felix.”

Ow.

“They’ll never last SHE'S just another slut I mean look how short her skirt is in that picture, such a sleeze”

Okay then.

A couple more months had passed and I thought it would die down but for some reason it never did and as the number of comments and articles grew, I felt my deepest insecurities grow as well, drowning out any ounce of confidence I once had.

The fat comments were an especially hard pill to swallow as I had always been insecure about my weight. Even though deep down I knew I wasn’t “fat” I still had trouble looking at a mirror and being happy with the way I looked. And having a boyfriend who is an international heart throb did not make things easier to say the least.

“Why aren’t you eating babe?”

“You‘ve lost some weight love since the last time I saw you, I’m a little concerned”

“Babe please eat something, are you okay?”

Felix had seemed to have asked these questions quite a few times in the past months, and I would always reply with the same short answers along with a fake smile.

“Lixie I’m fine, I promise.”

“I’m just not hungry.”

“Ohh I just ate I’m okay.”

It wasn’t just the fat comments not causing me to eat, it was everything that was sending me into a spiral of self hatred and let’s just say: my very own demise. I had lost all appetite because all I could think of were those millions of fans telling me how ugly and disgusting I was, and, oh yeah, that I should do Felix a favor and just kill myself. And the most annoying thing was, I had no idea why it was even getting to me so much. It just hurt knowing that practically a whole fan base hated you because you loved someone so unconditionally, and you couldn’t do a thing about it or change their mind.

And I started to believe every damn word that was thrown at me.

I was too scared to even leave my home knowing that people knew who I was and how I looked. I didn’t want to risk it. I was scared, point, blank, and period. Sadly, I didn’t have anyone to confide in. I had always been mostly independent and an introvert so friends were very few and far inbetween;I didn’t want to worry my poor parents, as they would be devastated and heartbroken to know their little girl was feeling this broken. And, I couldn’t tell my boyfriend because he was busy most of the time getting ready for a fucking world tour to notice, and there was no way in hell I was going to distract him from that, so me being very discouraged to bring this up to anyone, kept to myself and thought being alone was the best option.

At least that’s what I thought I could do.

I guess I was naive thinking I could hide and push away my own feelings, but every negative thought, moment of regret, and all my insecurities were starting to show and make their way from the dark abyss and pile to the surface. I wanted anything but to worry Felix with my issues, however everything was becoming way too hard to mentally bare and I was reaching above my boiling point.

“Y/N, please for fucks sake talk to me, don’t you understand I’m here for you? Don’t you understand I can tell when something is wrong?”

Felix, who was sitting next to me, quickly got down on his knees in front of me. He placed a hand lovingly on my cheek, softly rubbing soothing circles with the pad of his thumb on the skin, causing me to feel somewhat calm.

I didn’t want to tell him how I was feeling partially because I didn’t know how to explain it. There’s just so much going on inside my head that it feels as if I’m at war with my own consciousness.

“I-I’m fine baby I p-promise I ju-“ tears were threatening to spill and I couldn’t even look him in the eyes.

“Bull fucking shit (y/n). You for the past 8 months have been anything but yourself, you’ve lost so much fuckin weight to the point where you’re skin and bones, you’re not eating, and I- I don’t know what I’m doing wrong, and it fucking hurts to see you like this and I-“ tears streamed down Felix’s face, and he cupped my chin and forced me to look into him.

Everything was accumulating and it was starting to reach a point where hiding these demons was not in the question anymore. Seeing Felix in this much pain because of me, tipped me beyond off the scale and I felt almost angry that all this bullshit had happened. Am I weak for wanting to tell him?

Would he be able to handle it?

As I was building the courage to speak, I turned my head away again hearing my phone vibrate. I could see the notifications building up from Twitter on the screen from the previous hour; Felix noticed too and instantly shot out his hand to grab my device.

“Felix baby no do-.”

I tried to grab the annoying hardware before Felix could see anything, it it was too late. His eyes widened.

“Kill yourself you stupid bitch,

you’re so unworthy of a man like Felix like actual filth lmao,

You’re an ugly fat whore who will never amount to anything ,

Watch out Felix, she’s only with you for your money”

As Felix read the words aloud it felt as if thousands of knives were being stabbed into my body over and over again, but all I could do was stare at the floor in front of me, and not dare to look at Felix. I didn’t want him to know things were this bad, I tried to shield him from the pain I was feeling because he didn’t deserve to be included in the affliction. My heart hurt but I wasn’t going to let him be included in that agony.

I loved him too much.

“Baby….” I could feel his eyes bore into my figure and at that moment I couldn’t hold it in anymore. Everything that had pent up over the past months finally spilled out into the open atmosphere, and holy shit I was a sopping mess to say the very least. I huddled over as the sobs poured out of my mouth, they were mixed with so much vexation, sorrow, and panic as I didn’t know how to feel. Felix quickly sat next to me and put an arm over my physique, pulling me in closer to his broad frame. My head lay atop his lap while I cried as much as I could. He peacefully stroked my hair with his fingers, and every once in a while layed some soft kisses atop my head.

I leaned my head to fit in the crook of his neck,taking in the scent of his cologne. He held onto me tight, as if he was never going to let me go again.

“Baby, all this time…. why didn’t you tell me?” His voice was almost quivering but I knew he wasn’t going to cry.

“I- I didn’t want to worry you, you had so much to do for the tour and I thought it was dumb an-“ he stopped me.

“(Y/N) it’s not dumb that people are harassing you and making you feel this way. Listen, I love my fans each and every single one of them. However, you have to realize that in every good person there are another 5 evil ones who don’t respect mine or your feelings for one another, and those people are not true fans.”

He brought my face to look at his.

“Listen darling, I love you and if some people can’t respect that then, that’s their problem. Our love is stronger than this and I know we will overcome this hurdle. That’s all it is, these comments don’t matter they’re just people who have no respect or no life to worry about and all they want to do is take that anger and hurt into other people. But holy shit, I just thank god nobody hurt you or physically or came after you….I don’t know what I would do.” Felix kissed my nose and stroked the top of my hand with his very own sending small impulses of electricity up my body. The heat of his body comforted me and I had never felt more love for him than in that very moment. For once I could finally breathe again and smile.

Felix brought a hand to cup my cheek, the palm of his hand felt so reassuring as he brought his soft lips down to mine gently and with such passion. He kissed me as if we had all the time in the world yet it also felt as if it was our last moment together. The world could’ve ended right then and there and I would’ve felt content being in his arms.

I guess I learned it’s not good to hold things in, and now I know if I’m ever feeling sad or hurt that there are people who love me and are willing to listen. And as much as I wanted them to be, my problems were not small especially if they had me feeling the way I did. I don’t have to be alone even in my darkest thoughts or weakest moments.

All I know is Felix lifted a weight off my chest that was too heavy for me to even nudge. And for him I am more than thankful.

“Also those comments are bullshit because if anything darling you’re to good for me princess .”

I smirked at him.

“Oh really now.”

“Yeah but let’s get one thing straight.” I eyed him as he bit his lip, he coyly took the soft skin in between his teeth as his eyes went dark.

“ the only person who can call you a filthy whore is me. Got it?”