#how will i ever find a significant other when all my love goes to fictional stories?

[miraculouslbcnreactions]

Hey have you broken down Marinette's crush on Adrien and the ways in which it

A) misrepresents how teen girls get crushes on people they actually know and

B) sets Marinette up to seem really weird in a way the show literally cannot address because the universe thinks it's fine?

I know you can't prevent people from misinterpreting your show, but i think at the point where a significant portion of your audience and people with secondhand knowledge think of your main character as a stalker, that's a breakdown of communication on the writers part.

I've mentioned it offhand a few times, but I can go into it in more depth because it is a pretty massive writing flaw for reasons we're about to get into.

Marinette is not written like a teenager with a crush on her friend. She's not even written like a stalker. She's written like a teenager with a celebrity crush or a crush on a fictional character. In fact, if you go read fics from when the show first started airing, then you'll find that a lot of people assumed that Marinette's crush came from before she met Adrien or that it was rooted in a love of his professional work. That she was a fan who suddenly got to meet her idol and didn't know how to handle that.

I completely understand why that read was so popular. It's the only thing that makes sense! I assumed that was the case, too, until we got to Origins and her crush suddenly went from "obvious celebrity crush" to "crush with actual depth that's just been badly written."

While I'm ace, most of my friends are not, so I am very familiar with the experience of teenage girls getting crushes. I'm also deeply familiar with the experience of teenage girls getting crushes on celebrities and fictional characters. I, unfortunately, also know quite a bit about stalking. The three experiences are wildly different. For now, let's focus on the first two.

Celebrity crushes and crushes on fictional characters are experiences rooted in fantasy. You can be as over the top as you want because you know that nothing will come of this. You can go to a concert and scream the cute boy's name or have his posters all over your walls or publicly squeal about him with your friends without caring if people overhear because you don't expect him to ever care or even learn about your behavior. You know that you will never actually date him. He's a dream. A fantasy. A thing that will never be. That's the fun of this kind of crush. There's freedom in it. (This isn't unique to hetero crushes, btw, this was just an example based on my lived experience.)

I have strong memories of my best friend acting like Marinette, but only when it came to fictional men. When she was crushing on guys that she actually knew? The experience was wildly different because it was real. This could actually be a thing. She's not the only woman that I can say that about, either. I had many friends who had a celebrity or fictional crush and none of them ever carried that behavior over to their "real world" crushes. The stakes with the "real world" crushes were far too high for that sort of freedom.

Writing Marinette like someone with a celebrity crush is a terrible call on multiple levels. The most obvious issue is that it makes her look unhinged and creepy. While I don't agree with this take, I'm not surprised that people label her a stalker because celebrity crush behavior feels really creepy when it's applied to a person that you actually know. Whenever stories do the thing where someone meets their celebrity crush and actually gets to know them, there's normally a noticeable shift in their behavior as the character mentally goes, "Oh shit, you're real now." They lose the freedom that came with this being a mere fantasy.

The other issue with this writing choice is that it makes Marinette's crush feel superficial. The show spends hours letting her fantasize and obsess over Adrien, but rarely lets her actually spend time with the poor guy! It's incredibly awkward writing. You could have Adrien be a celebrity that Marinette never met and a lot of the episodes wouldn't change. That's not a great choice if your goal is to write an actual romance. Romances generally let the romantic leads interact.

As creepy and awkward as Marinette's writing can be, I will stand by my statement that she's not a stalker. She's nowhere near that unhinged. She's not stealing Adrien's things or following him home every day or breaking into his private spaces because she knows that they have a "special connection". We're never once made to feel like she's making him uncomfortable or harassed. Those are the kinds of things that stalkers do. They're delusional and divorced from reality. Do any of you really believe that Marinette would keep pursuing Adrien if he told her to back off? Hopefully the answer is "no" and, if so, then she's really not written like a "true" stalker because true stalkers just get dangerous when you say "no." They don't respect things like firm boundaries or restraining orders.

Watching Adrien's public appearances isn't violating his privacy and that's mostly what Marinette does. The rare occasions where she follows him somewhere private mostly revolve around someone else doing something questionable first, making Marinette's actions less "I want to see Adrien" and more "I'm worried for Adrien's safety and I'm doing something questionable because of that". The first is the behavior of a stalker, the second is... well, I'm not going to call it good behavior, but it's certainly not straight up bad behavior because the show isn't treating these moments as wrong so it's less Marinette being wrong and more the writers making really questionable writing choice. I mean, one of her break-ins was literally forced on her and orchestrated by her friend group! (See: Gabriel Agreste)

In fact, most of Marinette's creepiest behaviors fall under the "questionable writing choice" category as they're often just very obvious jokes of questionable quality. For example, I've seen people freak out about her having Adrien's schedule and it's like, guys, you do realize that was literally impossible, right? She claimed it was his schedule for the next three years! Nathalie doesn't even have that! You don't schedule things that far in advance unless it's a major event. It's impossible to take this claim seriously if you think about it for five seconds.

If you wanted to treat this schedule claim seriously and have it match the show's tone, then you'd have to tone Marinette's claim down, too. It would go from having his schedule for the next three years to just being aware of what he does on a weekly basis because they're friends and in the same class and you just sort of learn this stuff if you pay attention. How does Marinette know that Adrien has fencing on Wednesday? Because he has fencing every Wednesday. That's how this stuff tends to work.

I don't blame anyone for disliking the way that Marinette's crush was written. I don't like it either! It leaves a lot to be desired! The show would have been much better if they scrapped using Marinette's crush as the main source of comedy, but then they would have had to let Marinette and Adrien become close and we can't have that because it breaks the formula. The simple truth of the matter is that Marinette is written the way she is as a stalling tactic, which the episode Simpleman straight up admits:

Marinette: What am I doing, honestly? The truth is, I'm scared that Adrien will reject me if I tell him how I feel about him. That's why I over complicate everything, so that moment never comes.

In this scene, Marinette is claiming that this is a her thing, but it's really more of a writing thing. Miraculous is a formula show. Part of the formula is the akuma/sentimonster of the week and part of the formula is Marinette trying and failing to confess her crush. The show makes this pretty obvious, but if you want a more official source that this is what's going on, then here you go:

[The writing director] sold the Miraculous series to broadcasters as a formula show.... [This is why] Marinette tries to confess her love for Adrien in every episode, but is unable to do so.

They made Marinette's failure to confess part of the weekly formula which means that there can never be any romantic progress, thus Marinette being written like a fan obsessed with her idol instead of a teenage girl with very real feelings for her kind sweet friend. The first makes for an easy formula, the second won't work in that model. It requires there to be progress and a planned endgame. I'm not against formula shows, but this is a terrible element to make part of the formula!

The same issue plagues Adrien, too. It's the main reason why Chat Noir can come across as overly pushy. He's not allowed to move on just like Marinette isn't allowed to confess her feelings because they're the endgame couple. But we keep pushing back the endgame by adding seasons and so it's all become a total mess with terrible pacing and awkward, unhealthy relationships dynamics that really aren't suited to the genres or audience that Miraculous is clearly aiming for.

[psychic-refugee]

I loved MOA, I’ve watched it twice and it’s definitely a great rewatch. Probably going into my list of comfort films to watch again and again.

It definitely deserves its #1 Spot on Amazon Video.

I’m going to wait to give a full on review so people have more time to watch it and it’s less spoilery.  

I do want to address one thing that I don’t think is a fair criticism, at all.

I’ve seen several posts where they’re unhappy that the main character isn’t a lesbian. Someone even went as far to call it “lesbian erasure” and others are calling Megan Park/the movie lesphobic.

On one hand, I understand that there aren’t enough good representation movies for lesbians or the LGBTQ+ community, and it can be frustrating when something looks promising or if you had certain hopes, but it turns out a different way.

On the other hand, come on, BFFR and fuck off.

No one ever said it was a lesbian rom com. It’s a rom com with a character who is very young and in her limited experience had thought she was a lesbian, and then finds someone who makes her question that specific title.

Chad has ALWAYS been part of the synopsis and cast list. He was always framed as the romantic interest.

Other people's sexuality is not dependent upon your hopes and wishes, both real and fictional.

I think people are so chronically online and obsessed with labels that they forget that no one has met everyone they’re ever going to meet, ESPECIALLY NOT AT 18. Elliott had only ever been attracted to women up until she meets Chad. She’s also from a very small town, is itching to live in the big city of Toronto, and is about to attend the University of Toronto.

There is a chance she still would have figured out she was also attracted to men when the dating pool got much larger for her.

Is it “heterosexual erasure” if the opposite happens and someone goes off to Uni to discover they are attracted to the same sex? Or is it just part of some people’s journey?

I, personally, think it’s a great message that you’re a) not stuck with a title or specific sexuality and b) it doesn’t have to be this traumatic, existential crisis. I loved how she talked it out with her friend, Ro, and it was like, “oh shit (surprised)…tell me more (intrigued and supportive).”

Please notice how Ro and Ruthie (Maddie Zeigler) don’t question Elliott’s sexuality or try to make her feel bad about it, they just accept her as friends should.

Again, personally, I’m glad to see a queer story that doesn’t have queer trauma.

I hope everyone’s sexual, or lack thereof, journey is as easy going.

I also feel like the people who are mad that she fell in love with a man when “the right one came along,” and are calling it lesbian erasure, completely stopped paying any real attention to the movie.

Elliott NEVER calls herself straight. She NEVER indicates she no longer is attracted to women because she found Chad.

Her attraction to Chad is in addition to her general attraction to women. It’s very clear through the dialogue that she is very much into women, and that never stops.

Spoiler but not relevant to furthering the plot and it’s towards the end of the movie:

…

Older Elliott references having a current girlfriend in the future. Timestamp: 1:13:30

She doesn’t mention any other male significant other.

It could very well be that Chad is a one off, but still very important, valid, and REAL love in Elliott's life.

At no point does Elliott’s attraction to Chad diminish her attraction to women.

Fine, be frustrated in the general lack of lesbian specific movies.

But don’t call Megan Park lesphobic for not making a character SHE CREATED lesbian when Elliott was never meant to be lesbian to begin with.

[greenfiredragonfly]

Ever since I was a kid, I've always been so...frustrated, and honestly anguished, about how difficult it is to find a good, long piece of fiction that doesn't have romance as a primary focus or plot point. Why is romantic love always considered the most important? The most life-altering? The most permanent and significant? Why does platonic love always take second place? Why isn't it ever enough to make someone a part of your family the way that romantic love is? I've lost count of the number of novels, series, TV shows, and even fanfics, that I've dropped because it just became exhausting and disappointing. I hate our society a lot of the time. Being aspec, it's just so alienating. Romance is nice, but to me, platonic love has always seemed more important. More stable, more desirable. But nobody else seems to feel that way or act that way. Characters choose their love interests over everything else. In real life, friendship falls to the wayside in the face of starry-eyed love.

I don't know where I'm going with this, but. I've felt this way forever. And as I get older, I just become more tired. I trust less that platonic love will ever be enough for anybody to want me in their family. I find myself thinking that I'll never be able to have a family of my own at all, unless I play the game, and push myself into romance when all I really want is family. Our society isn't made for me. It isn't made for people like me. Nobody will ever choose me, never want me or prioritize me unless I fit into the love interest category for them, and it's unsettling, a little nauseating, and above all disappointing. I do feel like I'm missing a part of myself that everyone else has. I try to accept myself and acknowledge that being me, feeling how I feel, being aspec, is good and valuable. But I'll never have a place to feel at home. I'll never fit. I'll be a side character in everyone else's life forever, never someone who matters most, who is chosen.

And I'm just...tired. I'm tired. I don't know why nobody else would make a friend into family when they love them and have known them for years, meanwhile people will date for a few months, for one year, and then make each other their family.

It feels like the world is a little crazy. It doesn't make sense to me. And I am scared that I'll end up by myself as everyone falls in love and goes away and I'll be left here, with my platonic love that I feel so strongly and that means that I would gladly, gladly die for someone or move mountains...and it all means nothing. It feels like because I'm aspec, because I'm just a friend or whatever, that I mean nothing (or just not enough) and never will.

Yeah. Well. That's just what I've been thinking about. I started reading something really fun with a good plot, and then there was the romance, and it started making me sick, and I stopped reading it. And I'm frustrated because the story and the writing were good. I'm frustrated because of how alienating it felt to read. I'm frustrated by how alienating it feels to be alive.

[twistedtummies2]

Year of the Bat - Number 9

Welcome to Year of the Bat! In honor of Kevin Conroy, Arleen Sorkin, and Richard Moll, I’ve been counting down my Top 31 Favorite Episodes of “Batman: The Animated Series” throughout this January.

  TODAY’S EPISODE QUOTE: “So, it wasn’t all for nothing.” Number 9 is…Beware the Gray Ghost!

This is one of the greatest and most renowned episodes of the Animated Series…but as of these recent years, it’s also become one of the most difficult to talk about. In some ways, this episode is even more profoundly impacting now than it ever was before. It’s funny, because the reason(s) for this, I’m sure, will be lost on many future Batman fans; they will never know just how big a deal this episode was when it came out, and how big a deal it is now in this given year. Thankfully, however, those points will not detract from the greatness of this story on its own terms, and a great story is exactly what it is. In this episode, Batman finds out about a series of bombings, committed by a mysterious villain simply referred to as “The Mad Bomber.” He recognizes the crimes as being almost identical, in every way, to the attacks of a fictional villain in a TV series that Bruce Wayne loved dearly as a child, “The Gray Ghost.” To try and solve the case, Batman gets help from the Gray Ghost’s original actor, an aging performer by the name of Simon Trent. Simon has seen better days, as the combo of his typecasting and other personal issues have led to him falling on hard times, and he’s grown bitter about the role that once made him a household name. Batman must find a way to not only stop the Mad Bomber, but reinvigorate Trent’s spirits, as he teams with the Gray Ghost himself to end the crime spree.

Much like the later “Legends of the Dark Knight,” this is an episode that essentially pays homage to Batman’s roots, but in a much more subtle way. I guess I can’t go any further without bringing up the big point: the voice of Simon Trent. It’s none other than Adam West: the original 1960s Batman. The creators of B:TAS were huge fans of the original Adam West series, and odes and homages to the show are sprinkled throughout, some more obvious than others. Trent’s character is one of the biggest examples, as his fictional foibles are a sort of exaggerated mirror of how West’s own career and life went after the 60s series ended. It goes even deeper than that, however: the Gray Ghost himself is a thinly-veiled parody of The Shadow, a character I’ve mentioned many times in the past, who was one of the main inspirations for Batman as a character. (The first Batman comic ever made was an outright ripoff of a Shadow story. No joke, look it up.) Even the villain of the piece feels more like something out of the Shadow than your typical Batman tale, let alone the silly sixties. It’s a double-homage, in a sense, to two great influences on the creators of B:TAS.

This is also what makes the episode hard to watch now: Adam West has been dead for only a few years now, yet, and Kevin Conroy’s passing is still even more painfully recent. You can’t watch this episode as a Batman fan without feeling a sort of pang, realizing not only the significance of two of the greatest Batmen in history onscreen together, but the fact that both are no longer with us. In a weird way, though, that makes the episode even more powerful, because of what the whole story is really about: nostalgia. The way nostalgia effects all three of the main characters in the story – Batman, the Gray Ghost, and the Mad Bomber alike – is a BIG part of this story. Trent is someone who tries to shun the past, who feels pained when he looks back, and has to come to terms with the fact the world has changed, and he has to change, too. He’s haunted by the role that made him once iconic, while also dealing with the issue of being seemingly obsolete, no longer sure of who he is or what his life has truly become. The Bomber, meanwhile, is the opposite extreme: without giving away who it is, it’s someone who clings TOO CLOSE to the past, and to the things they loved in youth, and that obsession drives them to toxic self-destruction, not to mention acts of cruelty and spite. It’s probably not a coincidence that Bruce Timm, one of the show’s creators – a fan of the 60s series – plays this character; a sort of self-parody in the form of the world’s most unsettling fanboy.

It's Batman himself who shows the value of nostalgia and the balance of where it needs to fall: he clings close to his past, as we know, and the Gray Ghost character and series is revealed to be no exception. But he doesn’t allow these things to rule him or destroy him. For people who grew up with Kevin Conroy and Adam West alike, this episode shows just what made both of them such special actors, and reminds us of why both of their respective takes on Batman were so interesting, while also providing a fascinating story that combines all kinds of tonal elements to create an intriguing and entertaining tale. But above all, it serves as a lesson in the dangers and the values of what we keep close in our memories. I think it’s fair to say that everything about this episode – it’s actors, it’s inspirations, and the series it hails from – will be a treasured, nostalgic memory for many years to come.

Tomorrow we move on with Number 8! Hint: “But they share my unique face! Colonel Whathisname has chickens, and they don't even have moustaches!"

[tellthemeerkatsitsfine]

So, does anyone want a spreadsheet with every character Daniel Kitson has ever named? Because I’ve made a spreadsheet with every character Daniel Kitson has ever named. There are 198 of them.

That’s what I’ve been doing for the last couple of weeks, re-listening to all his shows with fictional characters so I could make a spreadsheet. I’ll be honest, when I started the project I thought it would be much smaller and more manageable than it turned out to be. You try picking apart where a character’s voice is coming from in a show with multiple unreliable and frequently narrators, characters inventing each other, confusing timelines, stand-up and songs and stories blending into each other, meta experimentation. The meta experimentation was the worst. I mean, it’s very good if you’re trying to have your mind blown by audacious theatre. It’s not so good if you’re trying to pin them down to a spreadsheet. I think I did fine.

It specifically lists named characters only, meaning I left out some major characters who have no names, ie. both Kitson and Key’s guys in Tree. Though on the other hand, I included some things that are can only extremely tenuously be called characters, just because they were given names. Like Isy Suttie’s car in the Christmas show. And various hypothetical people that characters in various shows invent. And one time in the play Mouse, when Kitson’s character (one of the two characters played by Kitson that interact with each other and have the exact same name because they’re different versions of each other, you see the problem in trying to spreadsheet this) just lists various first names and then says what he associates with those names, I included that too because technically it’s a name.

I don’t generally share my name on this site but I will say Tim Key has voiced characters in two different Kitson story shows, and in both of them, he had a love interest with my first name. My name appears three times – twice connected to Tim, once in a character named by Gavin, none of them are outright villains (I mean, let’s assume his date in Tree didn’t know he was married), so I come out all right. Some people don’t. There are a lot of bad guys named Brian. I think Brian is the most common villain name, followed by Barry. The most common hero/Kitson self-insert name is William. Followed by Benjamin, I think. More Claires than I'd noticed before putting this together. And a lot of characters where them sometimes going by one version of their name and sometimes going by another is significant to the narrative (again, this is a strong storytelling device but makes for irritating admin).

I caught a couple of characters where I think I know why he picked that name, but idle speculation is beneath us. Given the size of this spreadsheet and how long it took to put together, I think most names were chosen just because he'd already used every name he'd ever heard and was scrambling to find yet another one.

There are a few things missing from this spreadsheet. I'm pretty sure there are only two Daniel Kitson story shows I've never heard: A Made Up Story from 2003, and The Revenge of Heckmondwyke from 2008. A Made Up Story was from before he was as big a name so I think there were fewer people bootlegging him, and I've just never found a recording even though it was performed lots of times. Its two main characters are in my spreadsheet because I got their names off a review, but God knows how many other characters are missing.

Daniel Kitson does this thing where every once in a while he goes into Regent's Park with Gavin Osborn and does stand-up and a story show, and Gavin plays music during the story, and sometimes Gavin plays how own songs too, and for some reason those Regent Park nights are a part of the Kitson catalogue with which I'm particularly obsessed. It just think it's an amazingly cool thing, those little one-off nights in this cool theatre. I have "Go look at the Regent's Park theatre" on my list of things to do when I go to London this summer, as a pilgrimage to where history's taken place.

Anyway, The Revenge of Heckmondwyke was the story portion of the 2008 Regent's Park night, which I haven't heard recorded. However, the version of Impotent Fury of the Privileged that's on Kitson's Bandcamp page was recorded on that Regent's Park night, and I don't think he'd have recorded only the stand-up half of the night and not the story show, which means at least one Revenge of Heckmondwyke recording exists, Kitson must have it. He's just choosing not to share. Which is annoying, both because I want to hear that show, and because it's one of the few things standing between me and having a complete set of Kitson and Osborn in Regent's Park recordings (that, and the original Stories For the Starlit Sky from 2009).

I usually try to be slightly more discreet than this about the exact nature of my collection so maybe I'll take this post down in a bit, but I wanted to share at least temporarily because this took me 1.5 weeks and it's too big. Look at it, guys. Look how many characters there are. Why did I write down all those characters? There was no reason to write down all those characters. But there they are.

[manincaffeine]

NSFW asks

I want all the answers🌚(you can skip any if you want)

Okey love ✨️, Yk na you're a bad bitvh?? 😂 ,

1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer?

You in kitchen counter.

2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why:

Bad , because i didn't feel that connection b/w us , maybe it was bcz she wasn't my girlfriend nor i love her.

3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed:

Aann, emma mackey (from sex eduction) and lili Reinhart (riverdale)

4: Something that never fails to make you horny:

when girls say first what's want in bed.

5: Where is one place you would never have sex:

public place

6: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny:

--------

7: How are you after a really good f$%k?

That feel was amazing actually, boosted my mood :))

8: Have you ever got so wet/hard in the night that you wake up wanting some sexual activity?

yess , but I didn't have my partner.

9: Tell me your wettest dream?

shhhhhhh

10: Top or bottom?

Girls on the top

11: What body attracts you the most, men or women?

women ( I'm straight)

12: Ever kissed someone of the same sex?

Nope never,

13: Home alone and you’re bored. What do you do?

Sleep 😭

14: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find:

My money and my dairy

15: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you:

no one gave me Weirdest nickname but some ppl didn't pronounce my name correctly.

16: Are you a touchy feel person?

Yess fucking yess

17: If you were/are a lesbian, would you go for the women/girls who act like men, or the ones who act like girls?

Not valid for me.

18: Does a massage get you wet/hard?

i never goes for massage.

19: Is it ever okay to not use a condom:

Depends on my girl.

20: If there’s one place a girl should touch you to make you instantly horny, where is that?

when she kiss my neck

21: Has a girl even touched you or discreetly groped you while clubbing or in a crowded place?

nope

22: Ever left the house without wearing any underwear?

Yess

23: What do you wear when you go to bed?

pajama

24: Biggest turn on: when someone tell me what she wants.

25: Worst possible time to get horny:

when i was in meeting 😭

26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans:

Fucking yess

27: Worst sexual idea you ever had:

try BDSM

28: How much fapping is too much fapping:

more than 3 times in a week.

29: Best sexual complement you ever got:

Ahhaann, So once a girl told me that you're good in licking and you give to priorities girls , its makes you a gentleman. 😌

30: What do you think you and/or the opposite sex looks the sexiest in?

31: Have you ever been called a tease?

Yess 😐

32: Fill in the blanks: “If they ____________, we are ****in”

33: What your favorite part of your body:

My hair 😌

34: Love (>,<, or =) Sex For those of us who don’t remember our math thats “greater than, less than, or equal to]

love >>>> sex

35: What do you wear to bed?

Pajama

36: When was the last time you masturbated:

3 days ago

37: Do you have any nude/masturbating pictures/video of yourself?

Nope , i never film.

38: Have/would you ever have sex outside?

nope.

39: Have/would you ever masturbate at work?

Nope

40: Have/would you ever have sex on a plane?

Fucking No 😭 ( but it's one my fantasy)

41: What is one song you’d like to have sex to?

often by the weekend or I'll choose from my playlist.

42: Has anyone ever posted nude pictures of you online?

nope i never clicked

43: How do you feel about tattoos on someone you are interested in?

44: Does size really matter to you?

45: Is there anything you do on the internet that you would not like your significant other to see?

46: Do you own any sex toys? (what is it? (how long have you had it?)

47: Would you give your significant other access to your internet history?

yess , i have nothing to hide.

48: Would you be offended if your significant other suggested you get plastic surgery?

49: Would you rather be a pornstar or a prostitute?

50: Who gave you your last kiss? Did it mean anything?

A friend .

51: Do you like to have phone sex?

yupp, but i get bored easily .

52: Do you feel comfortable going “commando”?

53: Would you have a problem with going down on someone if they hadn’t shaved their pubic hair?

yupp, i don't wanna eat hairs💀

54: Booty or Boobs?

Boobs always 🤌🏻🫠🥺

55: If you had a penis, what would you name it?

56: Have you ever been on an official date?

Yess

57: Have you ever cheated on someone? (Why?)

Nope

58: Have you had sex with someone of the same sex?

nope,

59: Have you had sex with more than one person simultaneously?

nope

60: Have you ever been to a strip club?

61: Name one naughty act you have done in a public place?

62: Sex in the morning, afternoon or night?

Morning and night.

63: Shower or bath while having sex?

Shower

64: Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed?

65: Love or Money?

Money

66: Have you been caught having sex?

Nope

67: Does anyone have naughty pics of you?

nope

68: Do you like wild sex or romantic sex?

According to my mood.

69: Do you consider hair pulling sexy?

yess, but if my girl dont want it. i wont force.

70: What should a guy first do when about to have sex with you?

71: Something that will never fail to get you horny?

When girls talk dirty.

72: Favourite sexual things a guy/girl does to you thats not sex?

Kissing eachother

73: What do you wear to seduce the opposite sex?

seduce her w my words and action.

74: Have you ever paid for sex?

never

75: Do you like kissing in public?

I don't have sharam but if she's not comfortable, i won't do.

[dreamerdixon]

please I’m on my knees begging you for more married content 😭 this is amazing! after everything Jinx has been through this has definitely been a real treat.

I wanted to see if I could possibly put in a request? well it’s just things that I think would warm my heart to see!

maybe Jinx within the next few days is busy with something so Isha is left with the reader, all the while Jinx is worried about the reader possibly changing her mind about taking Isha in+ staying with Jinx. (I haven’t the slightest clue about the layout of Jinx’s hideout but for the sake of this idea there’s at least two rooms, the second one has been cleared out and cleaned up for Isha to decorate as she pleases) When Jinx comes back to her hideout late in the night she goes to check on Isha first and panics when she sees the room is empty, she immediately goes her own room to ask the reader about why Isha is gone; that’s when she finds Isha cuddled up to the reader. I think it’d be sweet if maybe Isha fell asleep on top of the reader and when Jinx joins them, they both unconsciously pull Jinx closer to them in their sleep or something like that.

in the morning Jinx is woken up by the sound of something blowing up in the other room, she rushes towards her work bench and sees the reader and Isha covered in powder+paint; turns out the reader’s been teaching Isha how to make a non-lethal version of Jinx’s bombs (Jinx doesn’t know that yet). Jinx privately asks the reader about the agreement they made and the reader confesses that she wants Isha to have something that would protect her if the both of them were ever not around to keep her safe.

Jinx already knows reader meant what she said about staying with her despite the significant change but I imagine there’s still an insecure part of her that can’t help but think what if cause this was a more extreme case, but seeing the reader and Isha so comfortable and caring with eachother is the reassurance Jinx didn’t know she needed.

thank you very much for this lovely piece of fiction, have a lovely day ✨

A Chance at Something Better

summary: Jinx's brings a little girl to your home, hoping to give her something better than what she had.

Pairing; Jinx x fem!reader ( they're married)

wordcount: 3.1k

Authors note: I saw on TikTok this one video saying that Jinx adopted a child, soo thats what I tried to do even if I have zero knowledge of whaat going on🤞🏻. If you want more married content just tell me and I'll do it, I kinda liked the idea of you and Jinx adopting a kid so, tell me if you want more of it.

masterlist

You’re in the dim glow of Jinx’s hideout, the familiar hum of metal and machinery filling the air. Her workbench is littered with tools, scraps, and half-assembled parts, each piece part of a weapon you’re carefully crafting for her—a small, sleek pistol that packs a powerful punch. The faint scent of gunpowder lingers in the room, and you can hear the quiet drip of water echoing from somewhere deep within the cavernous walls.

The two long braids and her purple eyes come into view before she does, Jinx’s shadow moving just a second ahead of her as she slips into the room. She grins, her smile sharp yet playful, watching you like she’s seen her favorite person in the world—because you know, deep down, that’s exactly what you are.

The moment Jinx steps into the room, a prickle of awareness slides down your spine. You sense another presence. Instinct kicks in before reason, and in one swift motion, you reach for a pistol on the workbench and whip around, aiming it directly at the darkened corner just beyond Jinx.

Jinx’s eyes widen as she realizes where your attention has landed, her mouth parting in surprise. “Whoa, whoa! Easy there, sharpshooter,” she says, her tone a mix of amusement and shock. She holds up her hands. “Drop the gun, okay? There’s… no need for that.”

You keep your stance firm, the pistol steady in your hand. “Why is it here?” you ask, eyes narrowed, keeping your gaze locked on the shadows in the corner.

From the darkness steps a small, timid figure, her steps cautious but curious. She’s barely up to Jinx’s hip, with wild blue hair that nearly mirrors the shade Jinx once had. The girl peers up at you, big eyes full of a mixture of awe and trepidation.

Jinx glances at her, then back at you, her expression shifting to one of guilty excitement. “She’s here,” Jinx corrects, her voice softening as she looks at the girl. “I know I was gonna… ease you into this, but, well…” She shrugs, her mischievous smile returning. “Surprise?”

You keep your gaze steady, the girl’s shy eyes darting between you and Jinx. The situation feels surreal, and though you’ve lowered the gun, the tension is far from gone.

“Jinx,” you say, voice firm, “can we talk… in private?” You emphasize the last word, giving her a look that says you’re serious.

Jinx’s grin wavers, a flash of nervousness crossing her face. She glances down at the girl, patting her shoulder gently. “Isha, stay here, alright? Just for a second.” Her voice is soothing, trying to keep the girl at ease as she leads you further back, just out of earshot.

Once you’re out of Isha’s line of sight, you cross your arms, keeping your voice low. “Jinx, we agreed… if anything this big was gonna happen, we’d talk about it first.”

Her fingers fidget with the edge of her sleeve, and she bites her lip, a little sheepish. “I know, I know. I just… I couldn’t leave her there. She looked so scared, y/n. Like she’d seen the worst of the Lanes in one day. I tried to picture leaving her, but… it felt too close to everything I went through.”

You sigh, the frustration melting into something softer as you watch her, seeing the hint of vulnerability she rarely lets anyone glimpse. “I understand that, Jinx. But bringing someone into our lives like this—it’s… it’s not just about a good heart, you know?”

She runs a hand through her braids, glancing down, trying to meet your eyes without completely meeting them. “Look, I know I rushed it. But she’s got nobody else. No one who understands. And if I’m honest… I thought maybe, with us, she could have a chance.” She glances up at you with a hopeful, almost pleading look

You let out a heavy sigh, pinching the bridge of your nose as you glance back toward Isha, then back at Jinx. “We make weapons, Jinx. Bombs. There’s nothing about our lives that screams ‘safe’ or ‘stable’ for a kid. Adding her into this… it’s not exactly ideal, you know?”

Jinx bites her lip, visibly torn but resolute. “I know what we do isn’t exactly kid-friendly, but it’s not like we’re blowing things up every single day. We’ll be careful. And… maybe she doesn’t have to see all that. We could keep that part separate. We’d figure out a way.”

You shake your head, though a small part of you understands where she’s coming from. “It’s not just about keeping her out of the crossfire. You know as well as I do that our lives are unpredictable. We’re not exactly… parental role models.”

Jinx crosses her arms, her brows drawn as she stares at the ground. “Maybe. But I think we could be. I mean, we’re not the monsters the world sees us as.” Her voice softens, barely above a whisper, “Isha deserves better than what I had. She deserves a chance. And we’ve got each other, y/n. Doesn’t that count for something?”

You let her words sink in, feeling the weight of her solve. The idea still feels overwhelming—foreign, even—but the determination in her eyes, that unbreakable hope, reminds you why you love her.

You take a deep breath, glancing from Jinx to the tools and parts scattered across the room. “Look, Jinx, we’re married, and yeah, we’ve talked about a family someday. But this?” You gesture around the hideout, with weapons and half-finished bombs lying out in the open. “This isn’t exactly what I’d call a safe space for a kid. It’s dangerous—everything about what we do is dangerous.”

Jinx’s gaze doesn’t waver, her fingers laced in yours. “I know it’s risky. But I also know we’re more than the things we make here. We’ve made a life together, y/n. Maybe it’s not perfect or normal, but it’s ours. And Isha… she could be part of that.”

You sigh, feeling her conviction but unable to shake your hesitation. “Jinx, we can’t just decide this overnight. It’s not just about us anymore.”

Her grip tightens slightly, her eyes softening. “She needs us, y/n. We can give her a place where she’s not alone, where she doesn’t have to be scared all the time. We’ve got each other… isn’t that enough to try?”

You look down at your wedding ring, feeling its weight more than usual. The decision ahead is heavy, and Jinx’s fingers tracing the edge of the ring only intensifies that feeling. She meets your gaze, her voice soft. “I know we didn’t plan this, but when I saw her, I couldn’t walk away. She’s like me… like us. And she needs someone.”

You exhale, still unsure. “I know, but we’re not exactly the perfect environment for a kid. We’re surrounded by weapons and bombs, Jinx. This life... it’s dangerous.”

Her touch lingers on your wedding ring as she looks up at you, her expression sincere. “I get that. But when I was a kid, I had Silco… and he was all I had, even if it wasn’t perfect. I thought maybe we could give her something real—something better than what I had.”

You rub your forehead, feeling the weight of it all. “It’s not just about helping her. It’s about how much it’ll change our lives. Are we ready for that?”

Jinx squeezes your hand, her voice steady. “I don’t know, but I want to try. I want to give her a chance.”

You watch as Jinx’s eyes glisten, the faint shimmer of tears threatening to fall. Her usual bravado is gone, replaced by something raw and vulnerable. You can see the weight of her words sinking in deeper than she lets on, the fear of repeating the past, of making the wrong choice.

Without thinking, you reach out and gently cup her face in your hands, your thumb brushing away the tear that escapes the corner of her eye. The action is tender, your touch grounding both of you in the midst of the storm.

"Hey," you say softly, your voice low but firm. "We don’t have to do this perfectly. But we need to know what we’re getting into, Jinx. It’s not just about the heart—it’s about everything that comes with it. The good, the bad… and the ugly."

Jinx sniffles, nodding as she leans into your touch. “I know. I just… I don’t want her to end up like me. Like I did back then.” She swallows, her voice trembling. “I just want to give her a shot at something better.”

You hold her gaze, your hands steady as you keep her close. “You’re not alone in this,” you say again, the words sounding stronger this time. “You won’t be doing it alone. And neither will she. We’ll figure it out together. No matter what.”

Jinx’s lip quivers, but she manages to hold your gaze. “I never thought I’d have a family. Hell, I didn’t even think I could be a part of one.” Her voice cracks, but she presses on. “But when I saw her, I saw that little version of me—someone who’s been left behind, someone who just needs a place to feel safe.”

You can’t help the tightness that forms in your chest as you listen. You know she’s right. It’s like a mirror to her past, the girl standing there alone, hoping for someone to care. You pull her into you, your embrace warm and solid. “We’ll make sure she has that. Safety. Love. A chance to be something more than what this place wants her to be.”

Jinx clings to you, a quiet sob escaping her. You can feel the depth of her emotions, the mixture of fear and hope swirling within her. She’s vulnerable right now, in a way you’ve rarely seen, and it makes everything feel more real.

"I don’t know if I can do this, but I’ll try," she murmurs against your chest, her voice muffled but full of determination. "I need you by my side. I need you to help me figure this out."

You hold her tighter, pressing a kiss to her hair. "We’ll figure it out, Jinx. Together. I’m not going anywhere."

You hold her close, letting the silence wrap around you both, the weight of the conversation settling between your hearts. Jinx’s breaths come a little easier now, though you can still feel the trembling in her body. Her fingers curl into the fabric of your shirt, grounding herself in the safety of your presence.

After a moment, she pulls back slightly, enough to look up at you with those wide, purple eyes. “You really mean it, don’t you?” she asks, her voice a mixture of wonder and vulnerability. “You’re not just saying that to make me feel better?”

You gently tuck a loose strand of hair behind her ear, a small smile tugging at your lips. “I mean it. I’m not going anywhere, Jinx. We’ll do this together. We’ve always figured things out, even when it’s been tough.”

She nods, her lips quivering into a small smile, though it doesn’t quite reach her eyes. "I don’t want to fail her. I don’t want to mess this up." Her voice drops lower, almost a whisper. "I just… I don’t know how to be a mom."

You lean in, brushing your forehead against hers, the intimacy of the moment wrapping around you both. "And you don’t have to know how to be one right now," you reassure her. "But you’ve got a lot of love to give. You’ve got that. And that’s a hell of a start."

She lets out a shaky breath, nodding slowly. "I guess we’ll learn as we go, huh?" There’s a trace of her old mischief in her voice, a glimmer of that familiar spark.

"Yeah," you say, your hand gently cupping her face again, “we’ll learn. And we’ll do it together. One step at a time.”

Jinx leans into your touch, her eyes closing briefly. “I never thought this could be my life... but maybe... maybe it could be.” She looks up at you, a new kind of determination in her eyes. "I want to make sure she has a chance to be better than I was. We can give her that.”

You nod, the weight of the decision no longer feeling quite so heavy. "We will."

And for the first time, there’s a real sense of hope, something unfamiliar yet comforting, settling between you both. You kiss her forehead softly, reassuring her once more that you’re in this together—no matter what comes next.

You both stand in the silence, the hum of the hideout settling around you. The girl, Isha, is still standing a few feet away, her eyes fixed on you both, her small frame tense but not entirely withdrawn. She’s looking at Jinx one moment, then at you, almost like she’s waiting to see how you’ll react, unsure of how this new chapter will begin.

You take a cautious step toward her, the floor creaking lightly beneath your feet. Isha doesn’t move, her posture defensive, but there’s a hint of curiosity in the way her blue hair flutters slightly with every slight movement you make.

You crouch in front of her, your knees sinking just enough to meet her gaze without overwhelming her. “Hey there,” you say softly, trying to keep the tone light. “I’m not going to bite, promise.”

Isha’s eyes flicker to your face, her lips parting slightly as if weighing whether to trust you. It’s quiet for a moment, and then, after a long stretch of silence, she hesitantly reaches out, her small fingers brushing against yours.

You give her a small, encouraging smile and gently take her hand, your grip light, offering her the space she needs to pull away if she wants to. You feel the chill of her hand against your skin, the coldness of someone who’s been through too much too soon.

“You’re safe here,” you say, voice low and reassuring. “You don’t have to be scared.”

Behind you, Jinx shifts, her usual chaotic energy subdued for once, her gaze trained on the interaction. There’s a look in her eyes—part gratitude, part uncertainty—that makes you pause for a moment. She’s watching, almost as if she’s holding her breath, waiting for something.

She takes a small step closer, her voice quieter than usual. “Thanks,” she says, the words tumbling out before she can stop them, more to herself than to you. “For not running off.”

You glance over your shoulder at her, seeing the vulnerability in her eyes. “I told you I’m not going anywhere, Jinx.” Your voice is firm, steady, grounding. “We’ll figure this out. All three of us.”

Isha’s small hand tightens in yours, a soft, tentative pressure that feels like the first sign of trust she’s given. You smile, a little more genuine this time, and shift to stand beside her, giving Jinx a glance that holds a promise.

Jinx looks back at you, her expression softening, and for the first time, you see something almost like hope flicker in her eyes. She steps up beside you, her presence a quiet reassurance to Isha.

“We’ll figure it out,” Jinx echoes, her voice quieter now. She glances at Isha, her fingers nervously twitching but keeping steady. “We’ll make sure she has a chance.”

Isha, though still cautious, seems to soften just a little in response. Her gaze shifts from you to Jinx and back again, like she’s beginning to believe that maybe—just maybe—she’s found something worth trusting.

Jinx’s eyes flicker toward the workbench, her gaze catching the sleek pistol you’d been carefully crafting. The change in her demeanor is almost immediate, the air around her crackling with a familiar energy. Her lips curl into a mischievous grin, the kind that only she could pull off. The uncertainty from moments ago seems to evaporate, replaced by a spark of excitement.

“Well, well…” she mutters, stepping over to the workbench and running her fingers along the edges of the half-assembled weapon. “Looks like someone’s been busy.”

You watch her, her movements quick and sure as she inspects the weapon. “I was making it for you,” you say, your voice holding a touch of amusement. “Had to give it some personal touches.”

Her grin widens, and she picks up the gun with a careful but almost possessive gesture, weighing it in her hands. “I know, I know… You always make the best toys.” Her voice drops a little lower, a mischievous twinkle in her purple eyes. “But I could use something like this, especially if I’m gonna be a good role model.”

You raise an eyebrow, your hands resting on your hips. “Role model? Are you sure you know what that means?”

Jinx gives a playful shrug, flipping the gun in her hands and inspecting it. “Hey, maybe I don’t know everything about being a ‘good’ role model… but I’m pretty damn good at keeping people entertained.” She gives you a sly wink, her usual wild energy creeping back into her voice.

For a brief moment, the weight of the situation seems to lift as Jinx takes a shot at her old self. The chaos, the thrill—it’s all there, in her eyes, in her grin. But beneath it, there’s something different. A protective edge. She’s not just planning her next move—she’s trying to figure out how to be something else, something more.

You sigh, crossing your arms, and take in the sight of her, the wild spark still there but now tempered with something else. “Just don’t get too carried away, alright?”

Her eyes narrow in playful challenge. “Who, me? Never.”

You shake your head, but the corners of your mouth lift slightly, the tension between you easing as you watch Jinx’s usual self return, in all her unpredictable, fiery glory.

“We’ll see how long that lasts,” you mutter, though it’s more affectionate than anything.

Jinx’s grin softens a bit as she looks over at you, the weapon still in hand, but her attention fully on you now. “Hey, thanks for sticking with me,” she says quietly, her voice softer than before, but the familiar edge is still there. “I know this... this is a lot. But I’ll do everything I can to make it work.”

You nod, feeling the weight of the moment, of the decision ahead. “I know you will, Jinx. Just don’t let this turn into another one of your schemes, alright?”

Jinx’s eyes sparkle as she steps closer, her lips curling into another grin. “No promises,” she teases, then lowers her voice to something more sincere. “But I’ll try.”

[fox-meat]

1, 2, 3, 5, 6, 7, 9, 14, 15, 20, 21, 25, 26, 27, 28, 29, 30, 41, 45, 51, 55, 64, 70, 72

SO MANY QUESTIONS thank you <3 SO sorry if I missed one, pls forgive me~

1: Kitchen Counter, Couch, or on top of the dryer? Couch is usually easier, but a kitchen counter if I weren't too heavy would be amazing /)////(\ Like me sitting on it and making out with someone,, eeheehh idk why that always made my stomach do flips~

2: Your last sexual encounter: Good or Bad and why: GOOD I mean I'm just gonna count the very light teasing I got last night >//< it was just some licking/biting and touching my chest, I looooved it and would love more~

3: A fictional person that you think would be good in bed: VINCENT METZGER (From Boyfriend to Death 2) he could destroy me and I'd still be begging for more in the morning aaaaaaaaa,,,, Also Inuyasha, you can bite me I've wanted him to fuck me since I was like 14 and barely able to articulate what being fictosexual/romantic was and HERE WE ARE

5: Where is one place you would never have sex: Probably like the desert lmao??? Public I would be iffy on too unless it was like "Oh no we're in the back of a movie theatre and no one can hear/see us" or something, that would be fine hehe

6: Weirdest thing that ever made you horny: The way my partner (Bovine) turned off the water on the bathtub of the house we used to live in. I have no excuse, idk what did it with that, but yeah. Also how my other partner (Canine) bowls, they go bowling and I just really enjoy watching and realized it's kind of hot ;//3 idk!!! .. ALSO (Helianthus) MY THIRD PARTNER he does this thing where I'll say something that's like almost sus, and it goes "Uh, huuuhhhh~?" so teasingly and I hate him (I love him)

7: How are you after a really good f$%k? COLD IM ALWAYS SO COLD I know like you should be all hot and sweaty but I'm just FREEZING every time

9: Tell me your wettest dream? Oh god I can't even think of a good one AAGGHHH okay one that comes to mind is I'm sitting on one partner's dick while the other is eating me out, and mind you I DO NOT like being eaten out inrl, insecurity and just not being able to relax enough to even TRY and enjoy it, so it was interesting, but god it was so NICE,,,,,,,,

14: Something that you have hidden in your room that you don’t want anyone to find: It's not even sexy, it's just like dirty clothes I haven't put into my hamper or something LMAO I honestly wouldn't mind if people found my sex toys, you can pry my werewolf dildo from my cold, dead hands

15: Weirdest nickname a significant other has ever called you: Stinky >:( … I also get called Fox Meat!

20: If there’s one place a girl/guy should touch you to make you instantly horny, where is that? Hmmmm either my neck or my thighs, if it's like an innocent touch. If it's like, foreplay, playing with my tits will go FAR <////< but like just being all coy yeah touching my thighs or my neck makes me go lightheaded eheheh,,,,

21: Has a guy/girl even touched you or discreetly groped you while clubbing or in a crowded place? Crowded? Nah not really. There was a guy back when I was like 13-14 who like, we were out at a bonfire by the river and he like pretended to look at my necklace, but while holding it his fingers were like against my boob LOL and then we got spooked by something cracking around us, and we were all looking like "Alright who's there?" and he started touching my thigh. It was a LITTLE sus but he was like just feeling me up (he was my age btw!) but yeah wasn't that crowded it was like, me, him, my best friend, these two other guys, and like another two girls that were friends I think?

25: Worst possible time to get horny: WORK.

26: Do you like it when your sexual partner moans: YES I like it more when they growl, and I like any sounds they make if it's like right in my ear and breathing into it /)////(\

27: Worst sexual idea you ever had: Trying to be a power bottom. It is not the life for me LMAO I'm an okayish dom but nothing to brag about, I am MADE to be a total sub or a brat and that's about that. I'm a dom mostly through text not in actual practice ;3c

28: How much fapping is too much fapping: No amount is too much!

29: Best sexual complement you ever got: That I'm apparently good at giving head uwu !!! I will ride that high forever~ (and it was my one and only person I've ever given head to LMAO)

30: What do you think you and/or the opposite sex looks the sexiest in? Thigh highs are top tier no MATTER the gender or "sex", they're sexy and I love them, also really like those like mesh shirts and when people cover their nipples in tape OwO !!!!!!!!!

41: What is one song you’d like to have sex to? Right now I'm listening to Your Eyes by Antent and honestly? I'd fuck to it.

45: Is there anything you do on the internet that you would not like your significant other to see? It's not sexy: Anything I've written in venting posts to myself. I need an OUTLET to yell out my frustrations and anger and bad thoughts, because otherwise I'll split and act irrationally and impulsively. Writing them out makes me reread them again and again, and realize what I want to do with those thoughts. DBT might be working, huh…

51: Do you like to have phone sex? I USED TO I'm really not a huge fan anymore? Like I don't mind sending voice clips of myself, but like, being live and jerking off just makes me squirm (/neg)

55: If you had a penis, what would you name it? That's a good question… I think I'd name it Danny Sexbang. It's fitting.

64: Do you want someone aggressive or passive in bed? AGGRESSIVE. I need someone who can take control and do whatever they want to me <3 I'm just a little plaything~

70: What should a guy first do when about to have sex with you? Ask LMAO but honestly just foreplay is VERY important with me. Even just some sexy talk over text, a little bit of grinding and feeling me up, trust me I'll be ready for it o////o

72: Favourite sexual things a guy/girl does to you thats not sex? Like I've mentioned, speaking/breathing/growling into my ear is a big one, kissing/licking my neck (or anywhere else, that's good shit, good shit), there's probably more I can't think of

Anyways THANK YOU BOVINE FOR THESE QUESTIONS ILY

[niseamstories]

10 Lessons on Realistic Worldbuilding and Mapmaking I Learned Working With a Professional Cartographer and Geodesist

Hi, fellow writers and worldbuilders,

It’s been over a year since my post on realistic swordfighting, and I figured it’s time for another one. I’m guessing the topic is a little less “sexy”, but I’d find this useful as a writer, so here goes: 10 things I learned about realistic worldbuilding and mapmaking while writing my novel.

I’ve always been a sucker for pretty maps, so when I started on my novel, I hired an artist quite early to create a map for me. It was beautiful, but a few things always bothered me, even though I couldn’t put a finger on it. A year later, I met an old friend of mine, who currently does his Ph.D. in cartography and geodesy, the science of measuring the earth. When the conversation shifted to the novel, I showed him the map and asked for his opinion, and he (respectfully) pointed out that it has an awful lot of issues from a realism perspective.

First off, I’m aware that fiction is fiction, and it’s not always about realism; there are plenty of beautiful maps out there (and my old one was one of them) that are a bit fantastical and unrealistic, and that’s all right. Still, considering the lengths I went to ensure realism for other aspects of my worldbuilding, it felt weird to me to simply ignore these discrepancies. With a heavy heart, I scrapped the old map and started over, this time working in tandem with a professional artist, my cartographer friend, and a linguist. Six months later, I’m not only very happy with the new map, but I also learned a lot of things about geography and coherent worldbuilding, which made my universe a lot more realistic.

1)  Realism Has an Effect: While there’s absolutely nothing wrong with creating an unrealistic world, realism does affect the plausibility of a world. Even if the vast majority of us probably know little about geography, our brains subconsciously notice discrepancies; we simply get this sense that something isn’t quite right, even if we don’t notice or can’t put our finger on it. In other words, if, for some miraculous reason, an evergreen forest borders on a desert in your novel, it will probably help immersion if you at least explain why this is, no matter how simple.

2)  Climate Zones: According to my friend, a cardinal sin in fantasy maps are nonsensical climate zones. A single continent contains hot deserts, forests, and glaciers, and you can get through it all in a single day. This is particularly noticeable in video games, where this is often done to offer visual variety (Enderal, the game I wrote, is very guilty of this). If you aim for realism, run your worldbuilding by someone with a basic grasp of geography and geology, or at least try to match it to real-life examples.

3)  Avoid Island Continent Worlds: Another issue that is quite common in fictional worlds is what I would call the “island continents”: a world that is made up of island-like continents surrounded by vast bodies of water. As lovely and romantic as the idea of those distant and secluded worlds may be, it’s deeply unrealistic. Unless your world was shaped by geological forces that differ substantially from Earth’s, it was probably at one point a single landmass that split up into fragmented landmasses separated by waters. Take a look at a proper map of our world: the vast majority of continents could theoretically be reached by foot and relatively manageable sea passages. If it weren’t so, countries such as Australia could have never been colonized – you can’t cross an entire ocean on a raft.

4)  Logical City Placement: My novel is set in a Polynesian-inspired tropical archipelago; in the early drafts of the book and on my first map, Uunili, the nation’s capital, stretched along the entire western coast of the main island. This is absurd. Not only because this city would have been laughably big, but also because building a settlement along an unprotected coastline is the dumbest thing you could do considering it directly exposes it to storms, floods, and, in my case, monsoons. Unless there’s a logical reason to do otherwise, always place your coastal settlements in bays or fjords.

 Naturally, this extends to city placement in general. If you want realism and coherence, don’t place a city in the middle of a godforsaken wasteland or a swamp just because it’s cool. There needs to be a reason. For example, the wasteland city could have started out as a mining town around a vast mineral deposit, and the swamp town might have a trading post along a vital trade route connecting two nations.

 5)  Realistic Settlement Sizes: As I’ve mentioned before, my capital Uunili originally extended across the entire western coast. Considering Uunili is roughly two thirds the size of Hawaii  the old visuals would have made it twice the size of Mexico City. An easy way to avoid this is to draw the map using a scale and stick to it religiously. For my map, we decided to represent cities and townships with symbols alone.

 6)  Realistic Megacities: Uunili has a population of about 450,000 people. For a city in a Middle Ages-inspired era, this is humongous. While this isn’t an issue, per se (at its height, ancient Alexandria had a population of about 300,000), a city of that size creates its own set of challenges: you’ll need a complex sewage system (to minimize disease spreading like wildfire) and strong agriculture in the surrounding areas to keep the population fed. Also, only a small part of such a megacity would be enclosed within fantasy’s ever-so-present colossal city walls; the majority of citizens would probably concentrate in an enormous urban sprawl in the surrounding areas. To give you a pointer, with a population of about 50,000, Cologne was Germany’s biggest metropolis for most of the Middle Ages. I’ll say it again: it’s fine to disregard realism for coolness in this case, but at least taking these things into consideration will not only give your world more texture but might even provide you with some interesting plot points.

 7)  World Origin: This point can be summed up in a single question: why is your world the way it is? If your novel is set in an archipelago like mine is, are the islands of volcanic origin? Did they use to be a single landmass that got flooded with the years? Do the inhabitants of your country know about this? Were there any natural disasters to speak of? Yes, not all of this may be relevant to the story, and the story should take priority over lore, but just like with my previous point, it will make your world more immersive.

 8)  Maps: Think Purpose! Every map in history had a purpose. Before you start on your map, think about what yours might have been. Was it a map people actually used for navigation? If so, clarity should be paramount. This means little to no distracting ornamentation, a legible font, and a strict focus on relevant information. For example, a map used chiefly for military purposes would naturally highlight different information than a trade map. For my novel, we ultimately decided on a “show-off map” drawn for the Blue Island Coalition, a powerful political entity in the archipelago (depending on your world’s technology level, maps were actually scarce and valuable). Also, think about which technique your in-universe cartographer used to draw your in-universe map. Has copperplate engraving already been invented in your fictional universe? If not, your map shouldn’t use that aesthetic.

9)  Maps: Less Is More. If a spot or an area on a map contains no relevant information, it can (and should) stay blank so that the reader’s attention naturally shifts to the critical information. Think of it this way: if your nav system tells you to follow a highway for 500 miles, that’s the information you’ll get, and not “in 100 meters, you’ll drive past a little petrol station on the left, and, oh, did I tell you about that accident that took place here ten years ago?” Traditional maps follow the same principle: if there’s a road leading a two day’s march through a desolate desert, a black line over a blank white ground is entirely sufficient to convey that information.

10) Settlement and Landmark Names: This point will be a bit of a tangent, but it’s still relevant. I worked with a linguist to create a fully functional language for my novel, and one of the things he criticized about my early drafts were the names of my cities. It’s embarrassing when I think about it now, but I really didn’t pay that much attention to how I named my cities; I wanted it to sound good, and that was it. Again: if realism is your goal, that’s a big mistake. Like Point 5, we went back to the drawing board and dove into the archipelago’s history and established naming conventions. In my novel, for example, the islands were inhabited by indigenes called the Makehu before the colonization four hundred years before the events of the story; as it’s usually the case, all settlements and islands had purely descriptive names back then. For example, the main island was called Uni e Li, which translates as “Mighty Hill,” a reference to the vast mountain ranges in the south and north; townships followed the same example (e.g., Tamakaha meaning “Coarse Sands”). When the colonizers arrived, they adopted the Makehu names and adapted them into their own language, changing the accented, long vowels to double vowels: Uni e Li became “Uunili,” Lehō e Āhe became “Lehowai.” Makehu townships kept their names; colonial cities got “English” monikers named after their geographical location, economic significance, or some other original story. Examples of this are Southport, a—you guessed it—port on the southernmost tip of Uunili, or Cale’s Hope, a settlement named after a businessman’s mining venture. It’s all details, and chances are that most readers won’t even pay attention, but I personally found that this added a lot of plausibility and immersion.

I could cover a lot more, but this post is already way too long, so I’ll leave it at that—if there’s enough interest, I’d be happy to make a part two. If not, well, maybe at least a couple of you got something useful out of this. If you’re looking for inspiration/references to show to your illustrator/cartographer, the David Rumsey archive is a treasure trove. Finally, for anyone who doesn’t know and might be interested, my novel is called Dreams of the Dying, and is a blends fantasy, mystery, and psychological horror set in the universe of Enderal, an indie RPG for which I wrote the story. It’s set in a Polynesian-inspired medieval world and has been described as Inception in a fantasy setting by reviewers.

Credit for the map belongs to Dominik Derow, who did the ornamentation, and my friend Fabian Müller, who created the map in QGIS and answered all my questions with divine patience. The linguist’s name is David Müller (no, they’re not related, and, yes, we Germans all have the same last names.)

[divinefireangel]

SF9 comforting their sad S/O will include:

SF9 x GN! Reader mini headcanons.

Disclaimer: This is just a work of fiction. If this piece of fan fiction is offensive to any celebrity, fandom or culture please let me know so I can take it down. Also note that this is my version of a character or celeb, which will vary from person to person.

Author's Note: Ya girl is sad. She's had two continuous shitty days and wanted to feel a lil comforted. Classes are taking a toll on me so do enjoy this piece I wrote in like 2 hours because I finally got time😭. It's probably bad 💀💀

Copyright: Please note that this is my work and if you want to publish this on any other platform, take my permission before doing so. Taking an author's work and posting it somewhere else without any intimation is just disrespectful. I readily welcome suggestions and criticisms. That being said, Happy reading! 🤍

Warnings: All ages and all readers (nothing specified with respect to gender, appearance, etc of reader).

Youngbin

He would want to find out who or what made you sad at first. If it's an actual person, they are doomed because he's gonna get angry

You remember that time on a JaeBin Vlive when a fan mentioned that their boyfriend cheated on them? Yeah kinda like that

Will definitely give great advice while hugging you

Pets your hair

Gives you a head massage if you have a headache due to all the crying

Forces you to take a nap

He's gonna be like a bright and positive mirror of sorts, showing you the nicer outlook on things and your problems, helping you change your perspective to a healthier one

Inseong

The first thing he does probably is a sad pout because his baby is sad 🥺

Embraces you in his arms, makes you feel small and protected for some reason I always forget that's he's one of the tall ones

He talks to you till you calm down and are ready to talk

Even if you aren't sure you want to talk about the problem, he will go on till you are comfortable and ready

Makes you a hot beverage of choice

Cuddles you to sleep.

No really. He doesn't move. Doesn't let you move.

You just accept defeat and fall asleep while laying on top of him

Jaeyoon

He would like to establish a small physical touch first and foremost

Will take your tiny hand in his and rubs his thumb over your knuckles

Kinda like testing waters, to see if it's okay for him to hug you and carry you to bed

Once he gets a positive reaction to his action, he become protective boyfriend 101

Looks at you with big curious eyes

Offers you soft smiles when you look at him

Kisses your face sweetly while squishing your cheeks

Starts humming a soft tune, like a lullaby to soothe your mental pain

Will cry if you cry

Sanghyuk

You don't even have to be visibly upset for him to know something is wrong

Makes the stupidest jokes ever lol

Prays with everything that those will work

If they don't, no worries

He sets up an impromptu mini date on the terrace

Goes all out to make you smile

If you wanna talk, he's all ears and listens to every detail as though his life depends on it

Once all your feelings are out of your system, he gently guides you to your feet

Takes your hands and puts them around his body and hugs you while dancing side to side

Seokwoo

Our fav tall baby boy

What will he not do if you're sad

Picks you up like a child

Holds you close to his body

Cooks you something sweet

Puts on your fav show or movie

Great at providing distractions

Sings you to comfort

No matter what happened, he assures you that it won't happen again, and even if does happen he'll be there to remind you about how you've overcome this situation already once and that you have the strength to endure it again

Juho

His face becomes so small when he sees you sad omg

Pouts and walks over to you to hold you against him

Hides your head in his chest

If you're laying on the couch then he hugs you lika a koala on a stick

Beckons his cute cats over to cuddle with you both

They rub themselves against your bodies this feeling is so serotonin filling

Kisses the apple of your cheek a lot

Back rubs and belly rubs to have any form of touch

Plays with your hair and fingers till you slip into slumber

He'll slowly and carefully slip out of you and cooks you something so that when you wake up, you can eat your tummy full

Yoo Taeyang

This gif omg

Our lovely sunshine

All he's gotta do is give you his sunshine smile and you're done for

But sunshine's a lil cloudy because the star he revolves around is upset :(

Pouty baby but he's ready to fight, if necessary

Rubs you tears away for you 🥺

Takes you on a lovely stroll in the park, hand in hand, swinging back and forth

Picks up pretty flowers for you

If you don't feel like going out, he will sway with you in your living room to soft music

Hums along with the music while his sky becomes less cloudy :)

Youngkyun

Opens his arms wide open for you to run up to him forgetting all your worries

Hugs you tight enough to block the air flow of your lungs

Caresses your cheeks and shoulders

Somehow, even I don't know how, convinced you to get ready to go outside

You go to a coffee shop, your favorite, first and then you go to his cat cafe

Once you find a comfortable spot there, he coerces you to cuddle him not caring what people think

Seeing you both so close to each other, the cats are naturally drawn to you both

Gives you great and deep life advice that he stole from Youngbin 💀

Kisses the side of your head soo many times there's probably a dent there now

Chanhee

Straight up asks you what you want him to do

He'll do anything for you

Even be nice and accept his hyungs' affections

If you have no answer, he will help you change into comfy clothes, make you tea, wrap you up in a blanket burrito like a newborn, sit behind you and help you drink the tea

Once you've consumed that, he will slowly start talking about his day, pausing after each significant event, waiting patiently for your input

Realizing that his voice is making you feel drowsy, he continues to talk to you about the randomest stuff until you enter a state of slumber in his warm embrace

[kibutsujidemon]

It would be better if he ate this stupid piece of shit alive .(about kisame and sakura)

I hate this sakura shity crap so much that I wish it all the worst and bad It would be better if she was dead, this is a whore prostitute .

everyone looks at the appearance and not at the inner character and psyche of people, everyone simply does not know this .

Why Sakura is a Bad Character: Fact, Not Opinion

From an analytical view Sakura is one of the worst and most shallow characters of any classic anime. Her entire purpose revolves around her feelings for Saske; she has no struggle or identity of her own, and if you cut all of her lines from the show it would literally not affect the main story at all. So from a professional writers perspective, she’s unnecessary, and pretty annoying frankly. I’m in season five and she has had one fight, and she got knocked out. This is not a debate, this is a rational, logical, factual, unbiased analysis. Everything just stated is true.

and i was just looking at my manga volumes and can't stand to see how come sakura has feeling for sasuke rather than naruto. ever since pt 1 sasuke hated sakura and told her that she was so annoying he said it twice in fact. and during shippuden he tries to kill her twice. is sakura that mentally challenged to keep going after somebody like that who doesn't give a crap about her? naruto is better suited for sakura. its a shame that anime characters like sakura go for the pretty schoolboys that don't give a care about her rather a character like naruto who does care for her. it just makes me sick and she keeps crying over sasuke.

Sakura is one of the worst characters of all time. And I’m not even exaggerating.

No, this isn't going to be a straw girl about how "useless" Sakura is, why Hinata is a much better waifu or even how Naruto and Sasuke are so much stronger. This is about how Sakura is a combination of every negative stereotype that paints a garbage picture of women in fiction. From the very beginning, Kishimoto spends a fair amount of time building upon the goals and ambitions of each character. We learn that Naruto's goal of Hokage stems from a fear of loneliness and desire to be loved/acknowledged and Sasuke's trauma from the Uchiha massacre leads him down a path of hatred that fuels his ambition to avenge his family. And when Sakura is introduced her entire motivation, dream and passion is about… some goth kid she likes?. Despite being a ninja she goes on a freaking diet to look “pretty” for Sasuke, putting herself and her team in danger. The driving force of her character is too lust over Sasuke's looks and fangirl because he's a brooding bad boy. These are her most significant personality traits during her introduction. We don't learn much about her background, skills and this certainly does nothing to get me invested in her character. People always whine about how unfair it is too compare Sakura to Naruto and Sasuke as fighters, well how about things as small as character motivation.

Speaking of Sasuke, her relationship with him is another reason her character sucks. Naruto’s obsession with Sasuke sends the same damaging message but atleast Naruto’s reason for caring about Sasuke are clearly explained throughout the series and make sense. Naruto sees himself in Sasuke and knows that he could’ve fallen to loneliness and darkness just as easily as he did. His fear of loneliness drove him to save Sasuke from that path. They’re also drawn to each other because they’re the spiritual incarnation of brothers. Sakura is obsse- er I mean in love with Sasuke because… reasons? They were on a team together for like a month. Their conversations are rarely above surface level. Sasuke never reciprocates his feelings and has more emotional intimacy with Naruto. I don’t even remember if Sasuke even complimented her ever. Sakura is further degraded as a character when she begged Sasuke to take her with him when he was abandoning the village. She was ready to abandon her friends and family to become terrorist, WTF! That’s not love, it’s just pathetic and sad. The only good thing about their relationship is that it motivated Sakura to become stronger so she could bring him back. But I also kinda take that back because once again her crush is the driving force of her character. Plus, Naruto does like 90% of the work anyway.

In Part 2 she cries and whines about not being strong enough while Naruto actually goes out and trains. It gets even worse in the infamous Kage Summit where she actually loses her mind and goes out to kill to Sasuke on her own. As expected she fails and almost gets herself her killed TWICE by her future husband. The nail in the coffin is when she actually starts getting upset that the guy that tried to kill her a couple days ago isn’t paying attention to her during a WAR. Sakura, for once, have some freaking self respect for yourself! Her life revolves around one thing and that’s her precious Sasuke. At that point her character couldn’t salvaged. Her idiotic love confession at the end just cemented that. Tldr: Kishimoto can’t write women, Sasusaku sucks and Sakura has zero self respect for herself.

I understand your reaction with Sasuke x mei, but how do you like sakura x kisame, don’t they have the same age gap?🤔

I don’t care about age gaps, they happen and it’s not always predatory. I care about the context and familiarity behind the relationships within the story. So Two reasons,

1. Sakura and Kisame never actually met or got to know each other while Sakura was underage, meaning any interactions between the two is all HCs and imagination. It gets rid of the idea that Sakura only likes someone for their looks because Kisame (even though I think he’s handsome) is considered a “freak of nature” and it would show she’s actually able to move on from a childhood crush. Kisame also would be getting a strong and caring partner, so this ship gets the green light. A wins a win

2. Sasuke and Mei did meet and didn’t really get to know each other, BUT shipping them makes this odd af comment even more problematic for me

It reinforces that Sasuke attracts people because of his looks and looks only, which we all know he isn’t into whatsoever.

It also negatively indicates that Mei was seriously flirting with a minor and might have actually been considering him a potential suitor because she’s portrayed as marriage obsessed. Meaning, she would indeed manipulate him to her advantage.

Even if I wanted to play devils advocate; neither one would actually get anything positive from this ship. These ships are not the same despite having the same age gap.

[waitimcomingtoo]

Wait For Me

Pairing: Peter Parker x Reader

Synopsis: you tell Cap the story of all the times you and Peter waited for each other. Takes place during Engame

Listen to Wait For Me from Hadestown for the inspiration behind this story

Masterlist

6 years ago

“Whats the B for?” You asked as you traced your fingers over the shiny brass clasp of Peters suitcase. It was your first time hearing of his superhero abilities, and he had pulled out his suit to confirm his identity. You had always known there was something special about Peter, something that set him apart. Him being a superhero came as no surprise to you, so you were more distracted by the monogrammed suitcase where he kept his suit.

“Benjamin. Like my uncle.” He said as he watched your face for any signs of judgement. There was the slightest whisper of a smile on your lips as you rubbed your thumb over the engraving.

“I remember him.” You nodded and looked up at Peter, squinting your eyes to get a good look at him. “Benjamin. I like that for you. It’s fitting.”

“Is it? I always thought Benjamin was an old mans name.” He laughed shyly as he scratched behind his ear.

“No. It’s cute.” You told him and he flushed. “You look like a Peter Benjamin, you know? Some people just look like their names.”

Peters mouth opened and shut a few times and he tried to think of a response. He wasn’t used to talking to you everyday, much less used to how pretty you’d gotten. 10 years apart and suddenly you were hanging out in his bedroom everyday, catching up on the part a of each other’s lives that you had missed. Your delicate features, now more defined with age but still soft, made it hard for Peter to think around you. He thought he’d never see you again after you left but here you were, folded up in his bed and running you fingers over the material of his Spiderman suit.

“I’d say the same for you, but you never told me your middle name.” He said finally, thinking back in his memory for any indication of what it was. “It begins with an E right?”

You smiled softly at him, appreciating his keen memory.

“Eurydice.” You told him and he tilted his head.

“What?” He asked, not realizing that was the name.

“It’s Eurydice.” You repeated. “It’s from greek mythology. It was my mother’s favorite story growing up.”

“What’s the story?” Peter set the suitcase on the ground and scored closer to you to give you his full attention.

“You really wanna know?” You tested him, still able to tell when he was lying.

“With all my heart.” He said as he crossed his heart with his fingers. You rolled your eyes at him, not having seen that movement since you were litter.

“Okay. There are a few different versions, but this one is my favorite.” You began. “A long time ago, there was a poor woman called Eurydice and she was married to a musician named Orpheus. Eurydice knew they were gonna starve if they didn’t make some money and buy food, but all Orpheus wanted to do was make music. She ended up selling her soul to Hades-“

“Wait, you were named after a devil worshipper?” Peter cut you off with a laugh.

“No.” You shoved him playfully. “Hades is the god of the Underworld. He’s not the devil.“

“Okay. Go on.” He urged you, leaning his chin on his hands, unintentionally squishing his cheeks.

“So Eurydice sells her soul and gets sent to the Underworld. When Orpheus finds out, he goes on this long, dangerous journey to the Underworld to find her. He gets there and plays his music for Hades, the song he’s been working on instead of getting food. Hades was so moved by his music that made a deal with him: if he can walk out of the Underworld with Eurydice following behind him, they can both go free.” You went on, smiling at Peters squished face.

“Sounds easy enough.” He shrugged.

“It wasn’t.” You held up a finger. “There was a catch. Orpheus was never allowed to look back and make sure Eurydice was still behind him. He just had to trust that she was. He wasn’t allowed to look at her until they were both out.”

“So what happened?” Peter leaned forward, eager to hear the rest.

“They walk the long, scary way back to earth, guided only by a lantern. Orpheus goes the whole way and never looks at her. But right as he’s about to make it out-“ ,You paused for effect and Peter whined in anticipation, “-he caves. He looks at her and she’s sent straight back.”

“He couldn’t do it? He couldn’t take that last step?” Peter exclaimed, frustrated with the ending.

“He couldn’t wait to see his wife.” You sided with Orpheus to defend him.

“But he was so close!” Peter whined, getting worked up over a fictional story.

“I know. That’s what makes the story as beautifully tragic as it is.” You told him.

“Orpheus was an idiot. You’re lucky she named you after Eurydice instead.” Peter grumbled and you laughed easily.

“He wasn’t an idiot. He could see the world for how it could be, in spite of the way that is was. He just couldn’t wait to see his wife.” You said softly, still taking Orpheus’s defense.

“I bet I could do it. I could’ve gotten us both out.” Peter said definitively after a beat of silence.

“Oh, yeah? You think you could be patient and trust your girl?” You challenged him.

“If I truly loved her, yes. I’d wait forever if I had too.” Peter said confidently. “Wouldn’t you?”

You thought about it for a moment, not blind to the irony of his question. You looked Peter deep in his warm brown eyes, the eyes of your best friend since you were little, and nodded.

“Yeah. I think I would.” You said softly.

1 month ago

“What about you? You haven’t move on?” A member of Cap’s support group sounded from beside you, tearing you away from the memory. You blinked as you came back to reality and saw the faces of the rest of the members looking at you expectantly, including Cap.

“Sorry?” You asked, not having heard the question when you were lost in your daydream.

“You mentioned in the first meeting that you lost your boyfriend in the Blip.” The member, a man who lost his wife and daughter, repeated. “Have you moved on from him yet?”

“No.” You said, sitting up and fixing your shirt. “No, I haven’t.”

“Why is that after five years of him being gone? You’re the only one in the group who hasn’t moved on.” He asked. He wasn’t being reproachful, just curious. You and Cap were the leaders of the group and watched each week as the members slowly got their lives back to normal after losing their significant other in the Blip. It hadn’t even occurred to you that you were the only one who hadn’t moved on.

“Because I’ve already met the love of my life.” You said confidently. “I know it’s been 5 years. But I have already met the man I’m supposed to be with. Now I just have to wait for him to come come. He waited for me, and now I’m waiting for him.”

“He might not come for a long time, if he ever does.” A woman in the group spoke up. She wasn’t trying to be harsh, just realistic. You gave her a tight smile and nodded.

“I know.” You said. “But that doesn’t matter to me. I’ll wait forever if I have too.”

The meeting ended shortly after a few more members told their stories. It was nearing the anniversary of the Blip, and everyone was on edge. You were quiet as you and Cap stacked the chairs up, obviously to his stare.

“What did you mean back there when you said he waited for you?” Steve asked gently as he pushed a row of chairs against the wall. You tucked a strand of hair behind your ear, suddenly aware of how long it had gotten, and leaned against the row.

“It’s kinda a long story.” You told him. He took two chairs off the stack and set them down, gesturing for you to take a seat.

“I have time.” He remarked as he took a seat. You laughed lightly as his action and sat down, picking nervously at your nail polish.

“I met Peter when we were 3, and we were best friends almost instantly.” You began. “We learned how to ride bikes together, started school together, basically made all our foundational memories together.”

“Okay.” Steve nodded, urging you to go on.

“My dad did a lot of business in California when I was little and when he got promoted, he decided to move there. My parents didn’t tell me about the move until the day we were leaving. I was crying my eyes out in the taxi when we passed Peter’s apartment building.” You said, looking up at Steve to see his reaction. He was looking at you intently, having never heard you tell the story before. “I pressed my hands against the window of the taxi and stared at his building, totally heartbroken, until an idea came to me. Mind you, I was 7 at the time and had a love of action movies.”

“You didn’t.” He smiled coyly, knowing what was coming.

“I did.” You chuckled. “I jumped out of the moving car and just booked it. I didn’t stop running until I got to his door.”

15 years ago

“Y/n? What are you doing here?” Peter asked as he opened his door to you. You had done your secret knock so he knew it was you.

“I have to go, Peter. I’m moving. My daddy got a new job.” You panted, out of breath from running. Peters eyes widened, hearing the world possible news of his short life.

“Moving? Where?” He asked, suddenly aware of your red eyes and running nose, all signs that you had been crying.

“California.” You told him.

“Like with the movie stars?” He asked, childlike excitement replacing the pain.

“Yeah. That’s what my daddy said.” You nodded, remembering what your dad had told you to keep you from crying. You had to leave your best friend, but you’d be with the movie stars.

“When are you leaving?” Peter asked, picking at the paint on his door.

“Today.” You finally caught your breath. “We’re going to the airport right now.”

“But…but I won’t get to see you if you’re in California.” Peter mumbled, starting to get emotional.

“I know. I don’t want to go, Peter.” You shook your head, beginning to cry again.

“Then don’t go.” Peter protested. “You can stay here with me. Aunt May and Uncle Ben won’t mind.“

“Okay. Okay, and then we can stay together.” You agreed, liking his plan.

“Y/n?” Are you up here?” You suddenly heard your mothers voice and your eyes widened, as well as Peters.

“Get inside.” Peter pulled you in his apartment and slammed the door behind you, reaching up on his tippy toes to lock the door. You both panted from the quick move, the sound of the phone ringing get drowned out by your heavy breathing.

“I don’t want to leave you, Peter. You’re my best friend.” You cried, bunching the end of your dress in your fists.

“You’re my best friend too.” Peter hiccuped as he cried. You wiped your cheek on the back of your hand and used the bottom of your dress to wipe his face too. He smiled at you, giving you that warm feeling he always did.

“Please don’t fall in love with anybody else.” You blurted. “Wait for me to come back.”

“What?” Peter hiccuped again.

“I’m gonna grow up and I’m gonna make my own money and I’m gonna find my way back to you. Or, or I’ll run away and get on an airplane.” You plotted as Peter nodded along. “I’m gonna come back for you, Peter. I will, I promise I will. You just need to wait until I get back so we can get married.”

“Peter? Is Y/n here?” Mays voice called from the kitchen, making you both jump. You hugged each other and backed away as May came into the room.

“Go away!” Peter screamed, fully in hysterics now.

“Y/n, sweetie, your mom is on the phone. She said you ran away from the taxi.” May said gently as she bent down to talk to you. She noticed your scrapped knee, bleeding now, but you didn’t even seem to notice.

“I’m not going. I’m not leaving Peter.” You stated, clinging to him tighter.

“What’s going on here?” Ben asked when he heard the noise. He saw his recently orphaned nephew clutching his best friend and immediately understood.

“I can’t go to California. I won’t! I won’t leave Peter.” You cried, gripping the back of Peters overalls for supports.

“Aw, honey.” May sighed in sympathy as she out a hand over her heart at the sight of the terrified children. “It’s okay. You and Peter can write each other letters and video chat. You’ll still be able to see each other.”

“No! She has to move in with us.” Peter shot down Mays idea. Her heart broke for her nephew, already having witnessed him lose so much. The flowers from his parents were still on the table. She couldn’t bear to see him lose his best friend too.

“She can’t Peter. She has to be with her own mommy and daddy.” May tried to reason with him.

“Why? I’m not with mine.” Peter protested, making May tear up. Before she could respond, your mother knocked on the door.

“May? Ben? Is Y/n with you?” Your mother asked through the door. You and Peter began to tremble as you clung to each other.

“No!” You screamed, cowering into the crook of Peters neck.

“Ben, can you settle them down?” May asked as she went to open the door. You and Peter tried to run but Ben caught you.

“Now listen you two, if you really love each other and I know you do, you’ll find your way back.” Ben said prophetically, making you and Peter release your grip a little. “I met your Aunt May once when I was 7, and again when I was 17. I believe in you two. I believe you’ll be reunited one day. But for right now, Y/n has to say goodbye.”

You slowly let go of Peter and turned to face him, tears streaming down your young face.

“Goodbye, Peter.” You mumbled, dry heaving from how upset you were. Your mother and May exchanged glances, not being able to watch their children say goodbye.

“Goodbye, Y/n.” Peter whimpered, wrapping his arms around you and giving you the tightest hug he could.

“Wait for me?” You whispered in his ear.

“I will.” He whispered back.

“Promise?” You asked as you pulled away.

“Promise.” Peter said as he crossed his heart. You did the same before your mother took your hand. You cried as she dragged you out of the apartment, looking back and reaching for Peter the entire way. You broke free from her for a moment and ran to Peter, kissing him on the lips like you’d seen the movies stars do. His eyes were wide open the entire time, but he liked it. Your mother scooped you up, said goodbye to May and Ben, and left the apartment. May and Ben stared at Peter as he touched his lips, still feeling your kiss. He sniffled, trying not to cry again as he watched his best friend leave him for the next ten years.

1 month ago.

“So, yeah. That was the first time he and I were separated. I don’t know which time was worse. They both killed me, just with different weapons. At least when we were 7, I was able to say goodbye.” You shrugged it off as you finished telling Steve your story. He stared at you in awe as you kept your composure. He had listened to a hundred songs stories about losing a loved one, but none of them had moved him like that did.

“How did you guys reconnect? Did you actually run away?” Steve asked, fully invested in the story now. You chuckled softly as his keen memory.

“No. I tried to but I never got very far.” You told him. “I ended up moving back to New York for college. My friend and I rented an apartment instead of living on campus.”

6 years ago.

“Shoot. I’ll meet you up there. I forgot a bag in the lobby.” Your roommate sighed when she realized she was missing her carry on.

“Okay. Text me when you get it.” You told her. Instead of getting on the elevator, you decided to stretch your legs and take the stairs. You had lugged your suitcase up a long flight and were about to round the corner when you smacked into someone. You almost went flying down the stairs, but something grabbed your shirt, something you’d later find out was a web, and sent you in the other direction. You collided with the stranger, feeling their firm grasp around your waist to keep you from falling back. You both panted as you caught your breath, feeling the strangers breath fam your face.

“I’m so sorry! I wasn’t looking and-Y/n?” The man asked. You blinked a few times as you stared at his face until you realized you knew those brown eyes.

“Oh my God, Peter?” You whispered as your eyes scanned his face, memorizing every new line and crease. His eyes were just as wide as yours, studying your features right back. An unfamiliar feeling filled your tummy as you stared at your childhood best friend, now fully grown. You couldn’t find the words to express how you were feeling, so you let go of your suitcase and wrapped your arms around his neck. Peter hugged you back immediately, taking in your scent. You were wearing perfume, something you hadn’t done when you were seven, but his super scent allowed him to smell your usual smell underneath it. Hugging you now felt different than it had when you were younger. His arms were wrapped around your hips, something you definitely didn’t have before. Your forever messy hair was longer and neat for once, as he was always used to seeing it in two braids. He could’ve cried holding you, but he didn’t want to scare you off. You pulled away and cupped his cheeks, smiling at what you saw.

“You look exactly the same.” You let out a breathy laugh. He did. He still had the boyish features you loved. The only difference now was he was taller and incredibly fit.

“Is that a good thing?” He chuckled, pleased to see your smile was just as he remembered.

“It’s the best thing.” You nodded, looking him up and down. “I can’t believe you never grew into your ears.”

“And you! You finally learned to brush your hair.” He dished it right back and you realized how much you missed his sense of humor, even better now with age.

“Shut up.” You scrunched your nose and smoothed your hand down with your hair. “What are you doing here? Did you move?”

“You remember my old place?” He raised his eyebrows, suddenly aware that his was still holding on to you. It didn’t seem to bother you, so he didn’t move.

“Uhh, Lee Towers apartment building, room 4D with the little flower sign under the peephole.” You recited, the view of his apartment door forever engraved in your no memory. The door always looked so big when you went from your height. “How could I forget? I practically lived there.”

“I know you did.” Peter smiled brightly at the memory of all your days spent in his apartment, the apartment he said goodbye too once Ben died. “May and I moved here a few months after high school started for a fresh start.”

“And I just moved here for college.” You said, mostly to yourself as the wheels in your Brian turned. You looked at Peter fondly and a smile tugged at your lips. “Your Uncle was right.”

“What do you mean?” He furrowed his eyebrows as you his face flushed from your close proximity.

“We found our way back to each other.” You said softly, your breath ticking his face.

“Yeah. I guess we did.” He bit back a smile, still reeling that he had you back in his arms after 10 years.

“Come on. You can tell me everything that’s happened for the past ten years while you help me unpack.” You grabbed his suitcase with one hand and his arm with the other. “But first, I gotta see May.”

1 month ago

“We talked the entire day. The sun started coming up and I was still telling him stories.” You smiled to yourself as you remembered the reunion. “We bounced back so easily, I felt like I had never left.”

“When two people are that right for each other, time has no effect. I speak from experience.” Steve smirked, a knowing gleam in his eyes.

“I know you do, lover boy.” You teased him. “I’ve seen your lady. She’s absolutely gorgeous.” You commented, having seen the photo of Peggy he kept on him more than a few times.

“She was.” He agreed. “And I found her just as pretty as an old broad as I did when we first met. Time meant nothing to me.”

“See? Sometimes, moving on is the wrong way to go. Some people are worth waiting for.” You decided, happy to have someone who agreed with you.

“So what happened next? Did you guys fall in love right away?” Steve asked, curious in the ending.

“No. It took about 3 months for us to finally bring up that conversation from before I left. We focused on rebuilding our friendship first.” You explained.

“I tell ya, I haven’t been this invested in a story since my presumedly dead best friend from the war showed up with a metal arm and a bloodlust.” Steve chuckled. “Keep going. How did you get together?”

“Relax. I’ll tell you.” You chuckled easily. “He and I had just got home from a college party. There was drinking, but Peter and I stayed away from that. A boy in our biology class, however, did not. He was flirting with me a little too much for Peters liking. I didn’t flirt back, but that didn’t matter to Peter. Another boy was after me and he got upset.”

5 years ago

“Whew. I don’t know about you, but think I’ve hit my party limit for the next month.” You blew out a breath as you kicked your heels off into the corner of Peters rooms

“No, me too.” Peter agreed, admiring the way you looked in your party dress one last time before you changed out of it. You shut the door to his bathroom but left it slightly ajar as you changed behind it. Peter made sure not to look, happy that you couldn’t see the flush on his face. You emerged from the bathroom in a hoodie and sleep shorts, taking a seat on Peters bed.

“You’re quiet.” You poked him, tilted your head to meet his eyes. “What’s up?”

“Nothing.” He shook his head and took your feet into his lap to rub them, knowing they were aching from your high heels. “Did you uh, get Brads number?”

“He told me his number but there were letters and some movie titles in it, so I’d say no.” You laughed, wincing a little when he touched a sore spot.

“He was all over you.” Peter grumbled, moving your feet next to his lap so he could trace small patterns on your leg.

“He was also drunk on 5 Black Cherry White Claws and wearing his belt on his head.” You reminded him in an attempt to cheer him up. He was clearly upset over something, you could tell by the way he wouldn’t look at you.

“He’s on the soccer team.” Peter brought up and you looked at him strangely. “I heard he gets good grade too.”

“Are you trying to set us up or something?” You laughed him off as you pulled your knees up to your chest to lean your chin on them.

“No. No, I just…” ,he sighed, “do you like him? In that way, I mean?”

“Peter, I don’t even know him.” You dismissed the idea. “Plus, he made a total fool of himself tonight. He threw any chance he had with me away the second he opened his mouth to show me his Viking impression.”

“Do you like anyone else, then?” He asked with a shrug, slowly looking up at you.

“Why are you asking me this?” You asked him curiously. You never talked about things like this together, lest it lead to a conversation neither of you were ready for.

“I’ve just been thinking a lot lately.” Peter admitted, looking down at his hands nervously. “Do…do you remember the last thing we talked about? Before you left, I mean.”

“When I asked you to wait for me?” You laughed softly, noticing the tips of his ears turning pink.

“Yeah, that.” He gulped.

“Of course I do.” You shrugged like to were not big deal, even though it was the biggest deal to Peter. “To this day, that’s the boldest thing I’ve ever done. Kissing you and then running away? I pulled a real Cinderella on you that night.”

“I thought it was sweet.” Peter defended, slightly offended that you were taking the situation as lightly as you were.

“It was stupid. We were kids and we had no idea when we were gonna see each other again. At the time, I had no idea how unrealistic I was being, or how much I was asking of you. Didn’t I propose to you or something?” You cringed at the memory. Peter stared at you in shock, angry that you were making fun of one of the most momentous moments of his childhood.

“I didn’t think you were asking for that much.” He said assertively. “Nothing I wasn’t planning on doing anyway.”

“What were you planning on doing?” You asked, finally noticing how upset he was.

“Waiting for my best friend to come back so I could be with her.” Peter said, tears stinging his eyes as he tried to compose himself. “Marry her, even.”

“Shut up.” You shoved him playfully, but he didn’t let up. Your smile faded when you realized he was serious.

“Why are you making this a joke?” Peter asked bitterly. “Do you know how hard that day was for me?”

“Do I know how hard it was?” You repeated in shock. “Peter, I had to leave my home and get on a plane to live in an entirely new state that I had never been to before, all with no warning. My mother had to rip me out of your grasp while I kicked and screamed. I know exactly how hard that day was.”

You turned away from Peter and folded your arms, glaring at his wall while hot tears streamed down your face. You had been trying to avoid this conversation in fear of how it would go. Fear he didn’t wait after all when you had turned down every boy who approached you in the past ten years because they didn’t amount to Peter. The fears were feeling very real in the moment and it overwhelmed you.

“Why did you kiss me?” He asked quietly. You looked at him over your shoulder and saw that he was crying too.

“Something inside me just told me I had to.” You shrugged slightly. “I had to give you something to make sure you wouldn’t forget me.”

“I could never forget you.” Peter said assuredly. “You don’t forget your first love.”

“I guess you don’t, do you?” You smiled softly and wiped your tears on your hoodie sleeve. “I loved you before I knew the meaning of the word. But I didn’t really need the meaning, looking back. The feeling was enough. Feelings for you.” You looked at him shyly. “Feelings that told me I needed to kiss you before I lost the chance. I guess that’s what happens when you’re 7 and in love with your best friend.”

“Well, I’m 18 and in love with my best friend. What happens then?” Peter declared, tired of beating around the bush. You turned to him and tugged your sleeves over your hands.

“Peter, what?” You whispered.

“That kiss you gave me was my first kiss.” He admitted.

“Mine too.” You said simply.

“It was also my last kiss.” He continued. You opened your mouth and shut it, taking on the weight of what he was saying.

“Mine too.” You breathed. You and Peter stared at each other, looking at the face of the best friend you’d fallen in love with, the one you’d always been in love with. You swallowed as you prepared to ask Peter the answer to a question you asked him when you were 7. “Did you-“

Peter cut you off by pressing his lips to yours, holding your face in place with his hands. You put your hand on the back of his neck and kissed him back, feeling a tear fall down your cheek as all your fears dissipated. Peter pulled away and rested his forehead against yours.

“Yes.” He mumbled against your lips. “I waited.”

1 month ago

“That’s how it started. We were only together about 9 months before he disappeared.” You told Steve. “You know, I still go home every night and hope he knocks on my door. I always expect him to burst through the door, his flannel flowing behind him like a cape and just pick me up and kiss me. He’d thank me for waiting and I’d tell him it was nothing, that I was happy to do it, because he was worth it.”

“You know, I used to think you were stubborn. But I get it now.” Steve looked at you fondly. “That’s a love worth waiting your entire life for. What I don’t understand is how you sat in that chair for 5 years and never told us that story. Why wouldn’t you say something?”

“Because it’s ours, and it’s all I have left of him.” You smiled sadly. “I don’t want to share it and make people sad, because it’s not a sad story. To me, it’s the greatest love story of all time.”

“We’re gonna get them back. One way or another, we’re gonna fix this. I promise you, I’ll do everything in my power to reunite you guys.” Steve said definitively.

“Why?” You asked him.

“Because I don’t want your story to end like that. You’re 23. I can’t sit back and watch you sit on the bench for the rest of your life, waiting for somebody to come home. I’m gonna bring him home. All of them.” Steve declared.

“How?” You asked. It had been 5 years already and no progress was made to get them back.

“I have a friend I need to talk to. You’re coming with me. Come on.” He stood up and held his hand out. You looked him up and down before smirking and taking his hand.

Present Day

Since you helped bring the Avengers together to set the Time Heist in motion, Tony decided it was only fair to let you help out in the final battle with Thanos. He leant you an Iron suit that you were currently using against a slew of space dogs. The more you fought off, the more came to attack you. It didn’t help that your heart was beating out of your chest knowing that Peter was somewhere on the battle field. You didn’t know how long you had been fighting, but your arms ached with every movement. You sucked in a sharp breath as a space dog lunged at your uncovered face.

You were about to cover your face when you felt something attach to your suit from the back. Before you could react, you felt a tug and flew through the air. You landed in somebody’s arms and saw the battlefield upside down as they dipped you, just like in the movies. They brought you back up and you were suddenly face to face with Peter Parker.

“Is my damsel in distress?” His Queens accent filled your ears as your eyes fell on his smirk.

“Peter?” You said breathlessly, eyes filling with tears at the sight of your boyfriend who you hadn’t seen in 5 years.

“I think so, unless my dust particles reconfigured into Zooey Dechannel.” Peter said sarcastically, making you erupt in laughter as the tears fell down your face.

“Peter!” You squealed, throwing your arms around him and hugging him as tight as you could. His new metal suit made it different, so you restarted to running your hands through his hair, trying to touch any part of his skin that you could reach. In the distance, Steve saw the two of you embracing and smiled to himself.

“Hi.” He laughed in your ear, appreciating all the affection. In his mind, he had seen you just a few hours ago. He didn’t register how much this meant to you. You buried your face in his neck and took in his scent.

“You smell like a new car.” You laughed in happy surprise, looking him up and down to take in his appearance. He looked exactly as you remembered, every freckle and hair in the same place.

“It’s the suit. Mr. Stark made it for me.” Peter said excitedly.

“Its beautiful.” You breathed, not taking your eyes off his face.

“Thank you! I haven’t actually seen it yet but it feels really cool.” Peter said as he looked at his hands. He was obviously to the moonstruck look you were giving him, just happy to be near him. “Mr. Stark got really mad at me because I snuck on the spaceship after he specifically told me not to sneak on the spaceship but it was a good thing because I helped get rid of the bad guys using the technique we saw in Alien.”

“Wow.” You nodded, just happy to be hearing his voice again.

“And the bad guy was like this half squid, half person who spoke with a British accent even though he’s from space.” Peter went on, childlike excitement filling in the brown eyes you’d been missing for the past 5 years. “Y/n, I don’t mean to overwhelm you, but I’m pretty sure there’s a second Britain in space that we don’t know about.”

“Really?” You humored him, tears of happiness still rolling down your face.

“It was so cool, Y/n. Until I died, anyway.” He laughed. “I wish you could’ve been there.”

“I wish that too.” You cried. “I’ve really missed you, Peter.”

“I’ve missed you too.” He smiled brightly. Your lip began to tremble at how I overwhelmed you were and Peters protective boyfriend instincts took over.

“Hey.” He took your chin between his fingers and tilted your face up. “Listen, I know it’s been five years for you and I’m a fool to even ask. But, by any chance, did you-“

You put your hand on the back of his head and pulled him into a kiss. The feeling of his lips on yours after all those years triggered a waterfall of tears to flow. You wrapped both arms around his neck as he held your waist firmly against his, kissing you as hard as he could. You sobbed into the kiss before pulling away, peppering kisses all around his mouth and jaw.

“Yes.” You smiled as he wiped away your tears. “I waited.”

Tag List 🏷

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[cursedchilddrarry]

Things the Cursed Child fixes about the books

I loved the books, but disliked the DH epilogue and wished a few things could have been wrapped up a bit better. One of the things I love about the Cursed Child is I think it satisfactorily addresses many of these issues, while still leaving enough story open for future books/plays/films/TV series (I can dream, can’t I??)

In no particular order:

1. It finishes Draco’s character arc

Something I always found a little bit disappointing was that Draco seemed so obviously set up to go through a classic villain redemption arc but we kind of only got about halfway. He got to be slightly less of a villain (not stopping Harry and the others escaping the Manor, walking away during the battle, etc) but never took that final step of actually joining the heroes, which we all find so satisfying anytime it happens in fiction. The Cursed Child gives us that, with Draco finally joining them and fighting alongside them, and it’s great.

2. It makes Ron/Hermione more believable

I was never a huge fan of Ron and Hermione getting together as they are just so different. I found Ron annoying through the later books and thought Hermione was just way too intelligent for him, I couldn’t see how their relationship could work. The Cursed Child kind of shows that it did work, in a way that I can accept. Ron balances Hermione perfectly - he stops her from getting too serious, sometimes helps her to step back from the details and see the bigger picture, and he plays the caregiver role, taking primary responsibility for looking after the children while she concentrates on being Minister for Magic. The alternate reality where Hermione is a severe Professor is a nice glimpse at how her personality might develop very differently without that grounding influence, becoming intolerant and arrogant, as intelligent people are often inclined to do.

3. It lets Harry finally have an honest, open conversation with Dumbledore

Although it’s only Dumbledore’s portrait, so really it’s just magical therapy for Harry, I found it so cathartic to hear Harry actually say out loud that Dumbledore shouldn’t have left him to be abused by the Dursleys for 10 years, and that Dumbledore should have told Harry more when he had the chance. And also, Harry says he loved Dumbledore like a father, and Dumbledore says he loved Harry like a son. It was the conversation I always wanted them to have.

4. It recognises Harry’s abuse

I think this is often downplayed for humour in the books, but the play addresses several times how severely Harry was abused as a child, in a much more stark and honest way. The dream sequence/flashback scene where we learn that Harry had nightmares of his parents’ murder and frequently wet the bed as a small child, and Petunia screaming at him, getting him up to re-wash the dishes in the middle of the night, telling him he’s disgusting, are all played very seriously with Harry’s adult and parent perspective overlaid (he is literally sleeping on top of the stairs while his dream/flashback self is under the stairs) - this makes it feel much more like abject abuse rather than a mere lack of care, which is how Harry often describes it to others or even frames it in his own mind. It is juxtaposed strongly against the efforts of all the parents in the play to try to give their children the best lives they can.

5. It fixes the epilogue

One of the things I found so annoying about the epilogue was that it was just patently ridiculous that Harry, Ron, Hermione, Ginny and Draco would have all instantly gone off to get married and have babies after the severe trauma they’d been through. Real world experience tells us that it’s far more likely they wouldn’t all necessarily still be friends or in touch, they wouldn’t necessarily at 40 be with the same person they were dating at 17, they wouldn’t all necessarily live in the same city, and they wouldn’t all be such well-adjusted, productive members of society. The Cursed Child goes ‘yes, the epilogue happened, but things certainly aren’t as rosy as it made out’. This is such a relief to me. Harry and Ginny’s relationship is not as solid as it’s made out (more on that here). Harry’s children are not all perfectly happy. Harry’s job is not going that great. Draco’s life has been difficult up to this point, and it just gets harder. Hermione and Harry have both made significant sacrifices to their personal life and wellbeing in favour of their careers. Harry has not truly recovered from everything that happened. These things are all far more gritty and realistic, and I much prefer it to the apparently sparkly perfect ‘happily ever after’ image that was presented in the books.

6. It lets us see a version of Snape post-reveal

It was so frustrating that the final reveal about Snape - that all this time he had been on the side of light because he loved Harry’s mother - only happens after he’s already dead. Harry never got a chance to resolve that, and he still doesn’t really as it’s Scorpius who encounters alternate-reality Snape, but it’s at least satisfying from the audience’s perspective, and presumably Scorpius told Harry about this ‘off-screen’ later. When he is coaching Scorpius to avoid the dementors, he tells him to think of his friend Albus, and says “One person. All it takes is one person. I couldn’t save Harry for Lily. So now I give my allegiance to the cause she believed in. And it’s possible that along the way I started believing in it myself.” This is a beautiful snippet of Snape’s core character that we never got to see in the books, as it was always buried underneath his various layers.

[ace-trainer-risu]

what are your fave diana wynne jones books that aren’t howl’s moving castle??

Oh whattt a lovely and fun question which I was definitely not secretly hoping someone would ask!!!! Yay!!

Hm okay so, not specifically in order, probably my top fave Diana Wynne Jones books would be:

Deep Secret! Deep Secret is not just one of my favorite books by DWJ but one of my favorite books full stop! It’s so good. Basically, the premise is that there is an infinite series of interconnected worlds, some of which have magic and some of which don’t, at the center of which is a vast interdimensional magical empire. Magic in the multiverse is overseen by an organization of magicians called Magids and there must always be a specific number of Magids in existence. When Rupert, a young Magid living on Earth, discovers that his mentor has died (ish) he becomes unexpectedly responsible for finding and training the next Magid, which is extremely inconvenient timing for him because the aforementioned magical empire is on the brink of civil war and chaos and its his job to stop it. And also almost all of this takes place at...a science fiction convention. It’s amazing.  I have read this book minimum four (probably more) times and every time it’s absolutely delightful and hilarious. I would like to go to the sci fi convention in this novel more than anything. It’s such a good read and its one of her few novels which is specifically aimed at adults, so I would EXTREMELY recommend it. Plus the romance in it is extremely good...not exactly enemy-to-lovers but more like ‘annoys-the-shit-out-of-each-other’ to lovers.  (**One note about this one...there’s a few very briefly mentioned side characters who are gender noncomforming and even tho they are actually portrayed very positively, it’s not necessarily ideal and 100% respectful (basically the protags comment on them being very beautiful and nice but also keep trying to guess their “real” gender). Additionally there’s a different briefly mentioned side character who is fat who isn’t portrayed very nicely. Both of these are brief incidents, just wanted to provide a warning for them)

Dark Lord of Derkholm - Okay this one is weirdly hard to summarize but it’s about this magical fantasy world which has been taken overy and is being used as a tourist destination by a non-magical world (heavily implied to be Earth) for people who want to role play at being in a classic high fantasy story, including fighting and killing THE DARK LORD...who is really just a random magician pretending to be evil. The inhabitants of the fantasy world do not enjoy this and are trying desperately to stop the tours, but unfortunately according to a magical oracle, their best hope of stopping the tours is this year’s Dark Lord, a hapless farmer magician named Derk, and his, um, eccentric family consisting of his glamorous wife, seven children (of whom five are griffins and one is a bard) and a simply improbable amount of magical animals. And also there is a very good dragon.  I think Derkholm is so great as a novel b/c it’s a very funny, loving but sharp, parody of high fantasy stories...but a lot of the time parodies only function as parodies but not as good stories in their own right, you know? But this novel completely functions as a story too, and in fact the first time I read at maybe age nine or ten, the high fantasy parody went completely over my head...but I still loved it. I also really love that this novel is very accessible to all ages, I think I enjoy reading it as an adult just as much as I did as a kid, which is rare.  For anyone who has read Howl’s Moving Castle but nothing else by DWJ and isn’t sure where to start, I think this is a great place to start. (TW: There’s a brief, non-explicit scene which has implied sexual assault.) 

Fire and Hemlock - This may be the most controversial one since it features a romance with a significant age gap where the two characters meet when one is a child and the other an adult. And I fully agree that that’s :/ and normally that trope is NOT my thing but it doesn’t come off at all creepy in this story imo, and if you think you can deal with that then this is a very weird, atmospheric, cool book about storytelling and fairy tales and growing up. The short summary (this is another hard to summarize one) is that as a child, Polly encounters and strikes up a friendship and correspondence with a young man, Tom, which mainly consists of the two of them jointly making up a silly, ongoing fairy tale type story...but things get weird when parts of their story start to come true in real life.  I’ve only read this one twice but it really stuck with me and in fact just describing it here...really makes me want to read it again!

The Chrestomanci Series - So all of the above are either specifically aimed at adults or a general audience whereas the Chrestomanci series is aimed at children, mainly a middle grade type audience. And tbh I started reading them as a kid (fond memory - I bought an omnibus of the first two with my allowance money...b/c it had a cat on the cover!) so I don’t know what it would be like to first read these as an older teen or an adult. BUT. Honestly they are really good and would be a quick read so I do still recommend them. There’s seven overall, with th seventh being a collection of short stories, and they’re only semi-chronological so the reading order isn’t vital. My recommended order (b/c this the order I read them in, haha) is Charmed Life, The Lives of Christopher Chant, The Magicians of Caprona, Witch Week, The Pinhoe Egg, Conrad’s Fate, and then Mixed Magic you can read whenever you want so long as you read it after Charmed Life and The Magicians of Caprona.  So the very core premise of it is not dissimilar to Deep Secret - there’s an infinite series of worlds/universes and there’s a magician, called the Crestomanci in this case, who is responsible for making sure magic isn’t abused across the multiverse. The Chrestomanci is an extremely powerful enchanter who has nine lives, and the novels are various semi-connected stories about the adventures of Chrestomanci as an adult and child. Chrestomanci is a title so it’s not always the same person, but for the majority of the stories it is the same guy and he’s...the best/worst...He’s this extremely handsome, charismatic, powerful enchanter who is very good at his job, loves his wife a lot, wears very beautiful clothes and makes, um, questionable life choices and is very annoying to everyone. I’ve thought about this very hard and I believe that he’s what happens when you take a fundamentally chaotic good person and make him do a fundamentally lawful good job; yes, he’s going to do it and do it well, but he is going to do it in the most chaotic, ridiculous way possible, and he IS going to die at an ALARMING rate, doing things that would not normally kill a person, such as playing cricket and trying to catch stray cats. He also, as previously mentioned, frequently wears very dramatic silk dressing gowns with elaborate embroidery, which the protag of Charmed Life finds deeply alarming.  It’s very odd to me how these books don’t seem to be well known, because the Chrestomanci books were some of my absolute favorite books as a child. I still have my omnibus editions of the first four novels and they are very worn and very beloved. And it’s so WILD to me that I don’t think I have ever talked to someone who also read those as a kid! Like I’m not saying those people don’t exist, I’m sure I just haven’t met them, but that’s so weiiirddddd to me. If I bring up Tamora Pierce or Garth Nix or other authors of weird, eccentric children’s fantasy novels to other avid childhood consumers of fantasy, people usually know what I mean, but Chrestomanci and its just..crickets. Is it b/c she’s British? Anyway all of the Chrestomanci books are very degrees of good, but if I had to pick a favorite, I think, controversial choice here, it would be Conrad’s Fate. Particularly in terms of recommendations to others, Conrad’s Fate works as a standalone and, unlike the other books in the series, it’s aimed more at a YA audience, so if you wanted to read a Chrestomanci novel without getting into the whole series, that’s a good way to go. It’s about a boy, Conrad, who is told that he has a terrible, possibly fatal Fate awaiting him unless he goes to work as a servant at a wealthy, and weird, estate neighboring his town, at which place he encounters things including color changing livery, an extremely annoying teenage Chrestomanci, and the greatest liminal space house EVER. It’s like a combination of an upstairs/downstairs Downton Abbey type social drama with bizarre fantasy shenanigans. How could that not be good??

Also as Honorable Mentions - A Sudden and Wild Magic and The Time of the Ghost. A Sudden and Wild Magic is fun b/c it’s one of her few works aimed specifically at adults and it’s (gasp) a little bit NAUGHTY which I was very surprised and delighted by when I read it. (This may seem like an unfair statement considering that Deep Secret fully has an orgy in it, but Rupert is so fundamentally unnaughty of a character that he completely unnaughtifies the whole novel, whereas Sudden and Wild Magic embraces being a (little bit) naughty.)   The Time of the Ghost on the other hand is weird and haunting and creepy and atmospheric. I only read it once but it’s one of those novels you just think about periodically and go “wait what the fuck that was a weird novel” (Also known as the “Garth Nix” effect) 

[transsexualhamlet]

alright it’s time for as requested part two of rowan reads the original sherlock holmes and compares it to yuumori

i finished a study in scarlet and holy shit was yuumori accurate to it

obviously they changed the case so that... well, moriarty was involved, and they didn’t go into detail on why drebber was an a-grade piece of shit (lol i wasn’t expecting the mormons but it was a great perspective actually doyle went big brain time on that one lmao) 

Hmmm i mean the other main difference is that Watson Is Gayer In The Original but yeah obviously that’s for a reason and the reason is william james moriarty

I have some highlights of “oh my god I need to see yuumori sherlock do this right now because he Absolutely Would” and they’re WILD

So yuh here are your Sherlock Moments

-when watson asks stamford why he might not want to board with sherlock bestie went “he’s a little queer” and watson was basically like “i like that in a man :)” like i am Fully Aware that’s not what queer meant back then but it’s FUNNY alright

-stamford is also like “yeah i mean he’s the kind of guy who would probably perform human experiments on his friends without telling them”

-watson walks into sherlock’s lab like hello new roommate :) and the dude immediately starts SCREAMING

-he’s all I GOT IT I GOT IT I GOT IT LOOK and fucking stabs himself and drips the blood in a container, yeah yeah it makes a reaction and he’s like I AM GOING TO SOLVE ALL CRIMES EVER ACTUALLY wait who are you

-SHERLOCK THEN PROCEEDS TO SEAL UP THE CUT WITH P L A S T E R AND THEN HANDLE POISONOUS CHEMICALS WITH HIS BARE, INJURED HANDS

-watson moves in with this dude and is like “oh wow im really interested in this guy but im Polite so i cannot ask him anything” so he starts snooping around trying to figure out what sherlock does for a living?????? like he couldn’t just fucking ask???? and he’s like wow he has these clients and he kicks me out of the house every time they come over i Really Don’t Want To Think He’s Fucking Them

-obviously, and to watson’s embarassment, he wasn’t. sherlock is a virgin and it is very clear

-watson describes sherlock in the most homoerotic way possible i don’t even know how to describe it bestie goes on about his hands for a full paragraph it’s really gay man

-WATSON IS SO POLITE ABOUT IT ITS ACTUALLY HILARIOUS ISTG HES LIKE I AM KIND OF SERIOUSLY OBSESSED WITH THIS DUDE BUT I COULDN’T POSSIBLY JUST ASK HIM ANYTHING OR LIKE TRY TO GET CLOSER TO HIM I WILL SIMPLY WRITE LISTS ABOUT HIM AND DIAGNOSE HIM WITH AUTISM

-he’s also like “i don’t know i really think hes on drugs i would say he’s on drugs but also he’s like this all the time and he might just be mentally ill” lo and behold it was both

-SHERLOCK GOES TO BED AT TEN PM AND GETS UP AT 4 AM EVERY DAY WITHOUT FAIL

-m o t h e r f u c k e r  d o e s  n o t  k n o w  w h a t  t h e  s o l a r  s y s t e m  i s

-and when asked why he doesn’t know! he’s like my dear watson! i simply cannot be bothered! my brain is filled up with more important things! 

-watson compares him to some fictional detective that edgar allan poe made up and sherlock is like HIM OH MY GOD DO NOT COMPARE ME TO THAT MOTHERFUCKER I AM BETTER THAN THAT

-it’s honestly really cute watson apparently will sit and listen to him play the violin and like request pieces and stuff and yeah sherlock can play those fine

-but most of the time if he picks it up on his own sherlock will just start plucking it with his fucking hands while slouching in a chair and sitting like L Death Note and playing random notes that Vibe 

-watson HATES it

-watson once picks up this paper sherlock has lying around about yknow. deduction and all that and how you find things out and watson is like “this is Bullshit who wrote this what the fuck this is the most unrealistic thing i’ve ever read” and then sherlock is like I Wrote It Shawty and watson is like. um. oh haha i take back everything

-MAN I JUST GOTTA POINT OUT I AM A TEENAGE BOY AND I COULD NOT STAY SERIOUS WHEN DOYLE THOUGHT “EJACULATED” WAS A GOOD WORD TO PUT IN PLACE OF SAID

-lol he was like “ahahahhaa my deductions” and watson was like “but How Did You Do It” and he’s like “I WANT TO LOOK COOL WATSON DONT MAKE ME RUIN IT BY EXPLAINING”

-GHHHHHHHHHH BESTIES when sherlock was Infodumping to watson About Crimes watson was like “oh my god that’s so cool bestie!” like Once and watson described it like “i was complimenting him like he was a girl and i called him beautiful and he blushed” LIKE DUDE THATS GAY

-that one time sherlock yelled “THE PLOT THICKENS” and lestrade was like “i t  w a s  t h i c k  e n o u g h  a l r e a d y”

-dude thinks he’s wrong ONCE and has a mental breakdown in front of the entirety of scotland yard before like five seconds later realizing that he was not, in fact, wrong

I’d say that the main difference between him and yuumori sherlock is that og sherlock has a massive fucking ego and yuumori sherlock is very loud but has no ego at all. Og sherlock will brag about how smart he is to anyone who will fucking listen. Yuumori sherlock will only boast abt his intelligence around Moriarty because he knows they’re both mindfucking

Other than that... I honestly cannot come up with significant differences between them. You can really tell how similar they are especially with the sign of mary episode- dude was just like >:((((( the entire day because watson has a fiance and then he walks in on a dead body and goes now hERES SOME FUN

He’s very accurately and enthusiastically portrayed, as far as I can tell, and I think that’s really epic. I love him. I might kin og sherlock too guys ngl

[whumpinggrounds]

Freddy (3) - 🎀📎🖍🌪☁️🌠💓

🎀: How would they fit into other worlds/AUs? What AUs would you like to try out? What fictional world would they fit/not fit into?

Considering how deeply shocked Freddy was by T, he would not fit well into a world with any significant level of magic. He also wouldn’t do well in a post-apocalyptic situation. My man likes his creature comforts. I’m trying to think of somewhere he would fit well…maybe a royalty AU? He’d do amazing in a role-swap AU because he’d look good all beat up oops wait I mean T would be mad protective of him oops wait I mean…uh…for…reasons.

📎: A random fact.

Freddy is left-handed! His mom was also left-handed. Oops that’s two facts my bad.

🖍: What advice would you give to them?

My advice to Freddy would be to be bolder. He waits too long to make moves and follow his instincts.

🌪: What is the biggest change you’ve ever made to them? How have they changed from their original version?

Freddy hasn’t existed long enough for me to have made major changes to him…I did originally conceive of him as being a foster kid, which he still is, but he’s a good bit older when he goes into the system than I originally thought he’d be. The circumstances of him entering foster care have also changed substantially in my head, although I will not elaborate on that just yet.

☁️: A soft headcanon.

Freddy sets reminders on his phone two weeks before all his friends’ birthdays, so he has enough time to find and mail them a gift or note.

🌠: If they could make any wish with no repercussions, what wish would they make?

He would wish for a bit more stability and confidence than he has – and a lot more money. Later, he’ll wish for guidance, and the ability to just…do what he thinks he needs to do.

💓: If they have a crush, is it noticeable? What changes when they’re in love?

It pretty much is. Freddy tries to be subtle, but he gets shy and much more awkward around someone he likes. He laughs more and talks less.