#how the fuck am i gonna sleep tonight!!!
Explore tagged Tumblr posts
Visit Tumblr Blog
Explore Tumblr blogs with no restrictions, modern design and the best experience.
Last Seen Tumblr Blogs
Fun Fact
Tumblr.com is the 103rd most visited website in the world.
Text
literally crying rn. i think that perhaps i have so much fear built up around This Specific Situation bc it took me like ten minutes to even send a text to my roommate so perhaps i should bring this up in therapy.
#like shoutout to my parents for making me terrified of asking someone to turn down the tv#girl im SOBBING bc a TV IS MUMBLING IN THE BACKGROUND#how the fuck am i gonna sleep tonight!!!#the thing is i think he mightve fallen asleep with it on idkkkkkkk#but its almost MIDNIGHT even if i wasnt gonna complain about the tv at 9pm its another thing to have it#blaring across the house at midnight. right??? like idk maybe im the unreasonable one but#its LATE#my door is open rn but even with two fans and my headphones i can hear it and i want to SCREAM#FUCK#r.txt#such a specific fucking. trigger i guess. i dont usually think about it that way.
0 notes
Text
dude, I forgot to charge my chromebook and now i can't write fanfic 💔
#alex suffers#i was gonna write haymily btw#also how do you write long distance relationships#because Hayley and Emily's relationship would unfortunately be long distance#also the worst part is that my chromebook takes fucking DECADES to charge for some reason#my ass is NOT gonna sleep tonight#which would probably be really bad because its a school night#damn im gonna be really fucking exhausted tomorrow#but writing about my two favorite female singers falling in love is better than sleeping in my opinion#oh also somewhat off topic?#but can we PLEASE write more Emily x readers#ones that don't have the tag “FORCED MARRIAGE”????#because thats literally the only other x reader of her besides the one that i wrote#which was kinda corny but whatever who gives a fuck#I AM A PROUD CORNBALL!!!!
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
im gonna lose it like actually
#2:38 in the morning. i go say good night to my mom. she asks me to grab something for her in the kitchen#to my horror: bugs.#small. but huge in quantity.#all over the fucking cabinet and our food.#u can imagine this was not good to experience as someone deathly afraid of bugs and infestations.#mom handled it (it wasnt an infestation just a lot of bugs and she just poured water on the problem and threw our food out)#but. i dont know how im gonna sleep now.#its like i can feel them crawling on me even though i even took a quick shower to try to wash the feeling away#ugh. im gonna try to head to bed now but if i show up again later tonight its cuz i failed and am so scared.
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
fun fact!!! the snow outside is only inches below my bedroom window and that tree right there has a ~5ft trunk normally 👁️👄👁️
#⟡ — kayleigh’s yapping#literally the entire trunk is GONE lmfao those branches are normally too high up to touch#there is 15+ inches of snow in my driveway and our snowblower won’t start and neither will my sister’s 🫠#i could ask my irl bestie’s husband to come over and plow/snowblow but...#a) the roads are absolutely garbage because the plows are taking the week off ig#(why is it that i quite literally - not an exaggeration - only see plows when there is nothing on the roads???)#(like i am not stupid i know that they sand and salt the roads in preparation but they NEVER actually plow the snow)#(last night there was literally over 6 inches of snow on the roads and i had to go 20mph or less the entire way home)#b) he doesn’t get home until 5:30ish#and lives 20 minutes away normally not accounting for the aforementioned shitty roads#and who knows how long it would take him to plow/snowblow if he even can with this amount of fucking snow#SO. TLDR. I TEXTED THE GC AND SOMEONE IS COVERING MY SHIFT TONIGHT. 🥲👍🏻#have an appointment on wednesday to go get winter tires put on which will help SIGNIFICANTLY 😭👏🏻#should’ve done it much earlier but i had no idea this winter would be like winters were when i was growing up 👁️👄👁️#getting to and from work with winter tires will be so much less (muffled screaming)#because i won’t be slip sliding around as much 😂 the tread will help my tires grip better 👍🏻#okay okay okay i am gonna play video games now and force myself to stay awake because i have shit to do on both days off this week 🙃#cannot stay up all night gdi i NEED to sleep!!!! 😤 and get up at noon at the latest!!!!
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
Bought a stupid suit thing. Disgustang.
#speculation nation#i got it on sale but it was still kinda expensive. ughhhh#hates every part of that. it's so stiff and uncomfortable and unnatural feeling.#but business professional is the recommended attire... so to that i went...#felt bad staying so close to close but the employees were nice about it at least. and i still got out b4 they closed (barely)#i wanted to go shopping earlier today. in between class and orchestra. but allegedly attendance is required in the lab.#so i went. didnt really feel like attendance was taken. but i still went.#still gotta finish prepping my resume but i dont think itll take Too long... i got a template to follow#from my web coding class actually. bc we just happen to have a resume building assignment this week.#so by working on my resume im working on the lab!! yay!!!#except im not doing the lab resume rn. just the normal resume. the template is still helpful tho.#also need to do a bit of research into the companies that are there and the interview style thingie#GOD this is going to be a whole hassle. i dont wanna wrinkle my stupid suit so i shouldnt stuff it in a bag.#and i dont wanna BIKE in the stupid suit. so im thinking of driving up to campus. forking over the money for guest parking#do the stupid career fair then drive back home to change and then go back up to campus on bus or bike in time for bowling#hopefully. we hope. nonzero chance of having to miss bowling and web coding classes tho. depending on how long i spend at this thing.#ultimately career bullshit is more important than one day of bowling so like. whatever.#but i still want a reward for sucking it up and going to the stupid career fair anyways. even tho i Really dont want to.#im already planning on skipping my first class. he made it sound like it would be fine + expected. so we can go to the career fair.#and that opens up a good amount of time so. doing that. and then hoping i can make it to bowling class...#it's funny to imagine if i didnt have time to go back home to change. me showing up to bowling in a suit.#im not doing that tho. this shit was too expensive to risk it doing physical activity.#BLARGH i am so supremely grumpy going to this thing. i dont want to. at all. i hate all this Professional Attire bullshit.#but i need to... and i already went thru the hassle of getting the damn suit... might as well just go.#i will simply pout and grumble the whole way. until tomorrow where it'll be full social smiles and whatever the fuck.#need to get enough sleep to make talking easier. no time for any fun stuff tonight.#need to find my damn. razor. bc i need to shave my little mustache thing probably. for 'professionalism'. ugh.#kicking and screaming this whole way. man i dont think i even own an ironing board. gonna have to hang the shit up and hope for the best#longest sigh imaginable... i just wanna write....... or play video games...... wahhhh#at least itll be over tomorrow. but then i will have to do presentation stuff for thursday. ughhhhhh
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
I'm close enough to the Netherlands that I have internet right now! Woo! No idea if it'll last long... don't think I'll be able to livestream Strictly on my phone anyway. Definitely feels weird for it to be 2:30pm and to not have already seen it. Anyway, in addition to the cruise-activity dance lessons, this whole nonsense happened last night:
About half an hour after I left that particular lounge, I wound up going to the ship's night club with some new friends I'd just met by the elevators and omfg...I feel like what I'm like on a dancefloor would be hilarious to anyone who knew how much of a massive fan of Sarah Hadland I am. I mean, I'm horrible - let's get that out of the way. Even if I were to become famous in Britain, I could never actually do Strictly. I can't follow choreography worth a crap. What I can do, apparently, is to be so excited to be spun like they do on Strictly that I wind up doing a sort of jump-and-squeal thing immediately afterwards 🤣 Also, that same guy told me I'm "very energetic." (as a compliment.) Actual words that came out of my mouth a bit later, when everyone formed a circle and people took turns dancing in the middle - "I feel like I just compensated by bouncing a lot." Then, towards the end of the night, being so obviously bored and not-my-thing when they played a bunch of slower songs in a row that some lady decided to try and tell me what I was doing wrong and how to dance better to it (as if we were on freaking Strictly, and not just... in a ship's night club at 1:45 am. No, I don't want to try and 'feel' the music right now... I just want them to play something faster, come onnn... )
...Yeah, sometimes your Strictly faves are your Strictly faves because you apparently just highly relate to them 😆 🤣🤣😅
#Today I am... running off four hours of sleep and unable to find my new friends - who I presume are hungover as fuck today#but later on guess which two dances are today's lessons?#If you guessed the fucking jive and tango of all things you'd be right!#Idek how that happened#I'm gonna be laughably terrible#but anyway I hope Sarah & Vito absolutely smash thier jive and tango tonight
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#vent#vent post#cw negative#Seven’s Public Diary#wish i wasn’t so fucking worthless and useless and stupid and selfish and mean#i am just so goddamn sick of my own bullshit. but i never change#i’m so tired of being weighed down by my 56492 mental illnesses. i don’t like being like this#my sleep schedule is so fucked up again and im tired of this constant cycle#this constant fight and endless effort to stay on a goddamn routine#all i want for christmas is a goddamn consistent sleep schedule#i hate sleeping through the day and being up all night but it’s like my body was fucking built for that or something#i don’t like it!! i want to be an early bird who goes to bed at 8pm and wakes up before the sun rises!!! but im the exact opposite!!!!!!!#i wish i just didn’t need to sleep at all. that would be the ideal. so many problems would be solved.#no i Really wish i just had the ability to fall asleep and wake up whenever i actually Want To instead of my body calling the shots#fell asleep at 9 this morning and im so mad that i didn’t get up when i was woken up at 11#a 2hr nap would’ve been fine and i would’ve made it through the rest of the day and been able to fucking sleep again tonight#but noOOooOoOo i had to give in to the allure of my warm cozy bed and fall back asleep for 9 more goddamn hours#now once again im too awake and rested to be able to go back to sleep. but once morning rolls around im gonna be exhausted again#and i’ll either give in and attempt to take a ‘nap’ and it’ll turn into a 12hr sleep again#or i’ll have to like. walk laps around the fucking house just to keep myself awake through the day#and i’ll be super irritable as a result and make everyone around me miserable too#but everyone is already beyond fed up with my issues and behavior. rightly so i guess. so i lose either way#god there was so much stuff i was gonna/supposed to do today#i don’t know how much longer they’re gonna put up with me being such a deadbeat#you think that’d like. motivate me to get my shit together or something but no. i’m addicted to being unconscious i guess#sleep feels so fucking good. until i wake up. which is funny bc it’s all nightmares and stress dreams anyway. why do i even enjoy sleeping#i guess bc for the first few hours after waking up i experience some modicum of relief from my other mental illnesses’ symptoms#like a soft reset.#and it’s the Only thing that gets rid of my migraines so god forbid i get one of those bc then i Have to sleep regardless of the time of day#anyways! :) that’s enough whining for one vent post. time to go do something productive
5 notes
·
View notes
Text
The wildest part about ship wars really is seeing what people pick to pit against your ship though.
Like, not liking a ship is one thing. A normal thing. Because tastes differ. But having to go on endless rants about why a ship sucks, that's already next level.
The choice to make that about another ship though? To go and say "actually this ship sucks, but that ship!!! that ship is So So So Great!!" like what that has nothing to do with that, that's like if we started doing movie reviews by randomly gushing about a totally different movie? Why? These are two separate things.
But then, then you are confronted with that. And you look at your own ship, which you love for various reasons obviously, and you look over at their ship, which for whatever bonkers reason they picked to pit against your ship - and you go "that? that's your choice? really? that?".
Like, you didn't have to do that. You didn't have to make your dislike of one ship about your liking of another ship. You can dislike strawberry ice-cream without going on a long-ass rant on why vanilla ice-cream is the worst actually. You could just separate these two things, you could dislike one thing, and like another, and these two emotions don't have to have anything to do with each other.
I mean, I do understand that this fully roots in a mentality of putting others down to elevate yourself; shit-talking the ships you don't like to make your own ship look better.
But that is just... not how shipping works? You shitting on another ship isn't gonna make your ship look better? If anything, it makes people think of your shitty behavior whenever they look at your ship and your ship will become a flagship of embarrassment and cringe.
Also, it's just always the wildest choices. It's just always a ship where you could write a five page essay pointing out all of that ship's flaws - and not even just by your own standard of what you like and dislike but by their standard, pointing out all of the double-standard, pointing out every "moral failure" that they criticize in your ship but that is just glaringly obvious in their own ship.
Like, they didn't even pick a "morally superior" ship (which, do exist. bland-ass vanilla ships who have never ever even had a disagreement, a unhealthy reaction, a weird dynamic or anything else that is not the peak of Good Healthy Relationship in canon do exist) to go into that war and that's the wildest and most ridiculous part.
#Shipping#Ship Wars#Fandom Discourse#I have no fucking clue how these two ships#even ended up on the same battle#like. there are more 'obvious' choices#when the mono-shippers see someone ship their blorbo#with Not Their Own OTP and SOMEHOW feel threatened by that#but these ships have no overlap in character and it's like lol what#gods I am not gonna sleep well tonight#I am having 'had to see an anti post' anger in my BELLY now
7 notes
·
View notes
Text
There Is Someone In My House And They Know I'm Here They Saw My Car On The Driveway I've Been Living Alone In The House For The Last 2 Days I'm Not Ready To Meet A Roommate I Don't Want To Put Pants On Or Get Out Of Bed And I Haven't Even Gotten To A Beaded Row On My Knitting Yet
#my sibling just called and said that the tattoo shop in town is taking walk-ins for the next hour and a half anf asked if they should get#their first tattoo right now. and our parents hate tattoos and our extended family fucking hates tattoos#oh my god i'm too young to have raised a 20 year old i'm not ready for these kinds of questions#and i haven't even gotten to a beaded row on my knittinggggggggg and that was the only thing getting me through work today :(#and it's my bedtime in fucking 20 something minutes and i'm not gonna get to one tonight and still get enough sleep before work and my baby#sibling might be getting a fucking tattoo how am i meant to sleep in these conditions!#girl. the stress.#a post
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
okay I severely misjudged spaghetti guy he’s actually just really cool
#okay so I came to this flat and he wasn’t here. greeted by a very dirty flat with shit all over the kitchen counters over cling film#I meet first my other flatmate who told me he stays in his room constantly bc of previous bad flatmates#has literally just a saucepan and some salt in the kitchen. so I’m like okay spaghetti guy potentially not great but could just be#how this guy is yknow#on Tuesday I get an email back saying he’s coming back from Norway tonight looking forward to seeing you feel free to use the kitchen sauces#rlly friendly message that I wasn’t expecting. I also didn’t know he’d been on a trip i just knew he wasn’t there bc his door was open#(to a REALLY nice room. multiple rlly nice plants (which he has little care labels for!!!) and it’s tidy and pretty#and he’s got a sheep teddy on the bed)#meanwhile I am in my own head bc I don’t wanna cook in the kitchen until I can clean it and I can’t clean it without moving his shit and#I haven’t seen him yet to talk abt it and I can’t bring myself to talk to him immediately bc I’m dying#and embarrassed as hell by how I’ve been cooking in my room with a microwave and air fryer (loud) and sneaking my shit out of the kitchen#but then yesterday I DO talk to him!! and he’s super friendly!! actually interested in having a conversation and Good at it.#and then he’s cooking and like. spaghetti burns but I’m not there for long and seems to be a mistake (he made the same thing for lunch today#and did Not burn the spaghetti) and is otherwise clearly competent bc the food smells Good and despite leaving a few things out it’s like#washed up stuff isn’t dirty and the sides are better despite still under cling film. more a case that he’s spread out than he’s messy#and now today we talked and i offered to hold onto some shit over summer bc complicated situation that boils down to he’s flying back home#and he cant take all his stuff and had to choose between chucking stuff/having literally nothing this weekend. like sleeping on the sofa etc#and then cleans the whole flat?? which I’m assuming a good chunk is his mess? but he did not need to do that. could’ve easily left#bc there are two people still living here who would’ve had to deal with it and he doesn’t know either at all#and THEN tonight we talk abt food which is fun bc we both ordered stuff. and he offers me some honeydew melon bc he’s been gorging himself#these past two days to finish it before it goes bad/he leaves which is also really sweet#and JUST NOW. I take my headphones out after finishing dinner and hear the sweetest fucking guitar#he plays the gentlest like dreamy sounding acoustic guitar I’ve heard in my life in his room (door closed by the time I leave)#this is actually just a really cool dude#now that the kitchens clear I’m gonna cook tomorrow and will probably offer him some bc otherwise he’s gonna be eating out all weekend#he has extra takeout for tomorrow night but might want smth Sunday#regardless I am just. huh??? left a bit stunned bc of the u turn my opinion of this guy has taken. bc my opinion of him was a reflection#of my discomfort moving to this weird dirty basement flat with two people I didn’t know#well. idk where to go from here. I think I’ll start by talking to him more this weekend. bc holy fucking shit.#luke.txt
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
forgot to take a quiz this morning (adhd) and it's closed so I can't just take it late and while this will have almost no affect on my life long term whatsoever I DO feel as if I will die from it
#it was a 19 point quiz so it wasn't like. a HUGE deal. we had 5 others AND a 48 point final still#but i am still really pissed that the quiz closed early#i will not be asking the professor for an extension bc i am not that dutiful of a student lmao#ill just deal with it but i am extremely pissed at myself#and like. i have others things to want to kms over lmfao a missed quiz will not be the end of me#me to me: don't be dramatic it isn't that big a deal. but if you do it again I'll fucking destroy you#what a fucked up day. i was so excited to sleep in too#now i have to unpack whether or not im this upset bc im worried i disappointed someone or bc im worried i disappointed MYSELF#which are two distinctly different issues. neither of which i know how to solve lmao but what ever#hey google how do i stop holding myself to an impossible standard without letting myself slip completely#i built a cage around myself and my responsibilities so that i had no choice but to do them but i think its killing me#incredible headspace we are in tonight ! well done everyone (me)#and now i taste jasmine and there's gonna be a party when the wolf comes home etc etc#vent
3 notes
·
View notes
Text
protip. if you have a squirrel infestation and believe you've transferred the last one outside. maybe wait like 3 hours or something. before calling it quits. because there could always be three baby squirrels instead of 2. my room is in shambles there's a new hole cut in my wall and i'm terrified the cute little bastards got fleas on my bed. i'm sure i've had worse sundays but i can't readily recall one tbh!
#len speaks#i cant even concentrate on my book rn bc what if there are BUGS in my fucking bed dude what then??????#how am i gonna sleep tonight oh god
4 notes
·
View notes
Text
.
#idk how I’m gonna sound when i say this#but my mom is trying to hold me hostage#not like in a criminal way#but i am trying to go over to my granny’s house cause we’re doing a game night and she refuses to let me leave#Nevermind that i need to make a stop by the store#she’s been trying to get me to come home for months now and sleep with her#and i fucked uo by asking if she wanted to go to a museum tomorrow#which means it doesn’t make sense for me to go back to my apartment tonight#which may force me to stay home with her tonight#and I’d rather sleep in my car#like she refuses to let me go#and im so thankful im moving hours away so im not easily accessible#because it’s annoying af and kind of scary#i love her but i can’t stay here#i hate my house and the way it makes me feel
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
excited for another day of my one supervisor telling me I'm doing an amazing job and gushing over me vs my other supervisor and my "boss" who's not supposed to still be my boss persay or not in the way she was anyways, they fucking act like I'm scum for trying to get ahead by *glances at notes* helping my supervisors
#like im not trying to take anything from anyone!!! im just trying to help them out!!!#if my supervisor who has a stack of paperwork to fix infront of her now has another folder for an order that#she wasnt in the room for. the other person my 'boss' is exlusively training on paperwork also wasnt in the room for. and the supervisor who#WAS in the room is the one who just fucked up this paperwork for the order#then yeah im gonna offer to help her with this folder since i actually WAS in the room#in fact i got left in charge for the first 2.5 hours cause no supervisors were in the room at all!!!!! UGH#at that point i was the most experienced person in the room by far!!! and i know so much about this company#cause its like. a passion of mine. so i know a lot about the products we sell!!! like a LOT#more than my bosses cause i actually buy a shit ton of our product. so i know how many per product or what colour label or whatever tf#just off the top of my head!!!!#i also am very passionate about NOT SENDING OUT DAMAGED PRODUCT#meanwhile 'boss' says im being too picky#AM I??? CAUSE IVE BOUGHT TWO PRODUCTS NOW WITH MY OWN PAYCHEQUE THAT WERE DAMAGED#ugh christ. im just very tired from this week between all that and the intense drama from earlier this week#im ready to sleep in all weekend#except idiot me made plans for every day this weekend#tonight i hang out with my dad and my bf#tomorrow me and bf go to my coworkers for drinks and viddy games#and sunday we go out of town with bf's sister for drag brunch and thrifting#so itll all be fun i just KNOW im gonna wind up exhausted 😭😭😭 plus truthfully i just wanna show my bf more movies
2 notes
·
View notes
Text
why does scheduling my work days give me so much stress and anxiety
#i was supposed to do my first day at the high school today but i had literally so much anxiety i could not fall asleep last night no matter#what. i had so much dread. i took so much melatonin lol.#i could shut my brain off till i went into the application and deleted my schedule for the day#ive just been feeling so fatigued and exhausted since i got covid it's crazy. sometimes i'll have bursts of energy where im productive#but yesterday i was just so tired from loading the washing machine. just. fucking sorting clothes and putting them in#that i had to lie down on the floor for a few minutes in the middle of it#not my finest moment#tales from diana#i didn't have anything scheduled for tomorrow and i thought 'maybe if i feel better tonight ill call in'#but i dont feel. super better tonight. and the only thing that i could do tomorrow at my preferred school is kindergarten subbing#for like the main classroom teacher. which i havent done before so i figured 'yeah im not gonna get my anxiety up 2 days in a row'#i deserve to sleep tonight after all and i think if i committed to that i wouldnt be able to#but i am going into my elementary school on wed-thur-friday of this week. wednesday is only a half day but they'll probably find smth for me#to do in the afternoon. they usually do. and im fine w that.#idk im just much more comfortable in my elementary school. i guess bc ive worked there before and i went to school there#as a wittle student waaaay back in the day. like i know the building and it doesn't scare me and i know a good amount of kids there#and the staff don't intimidate me. so yeah.#i did schedule my first job at the high school FOR REAL THIS TIME and it's next friday. hopefully ill be doing better by then.#im working the thursday before it at the elementary so i'll be in the rhythm of that. idk how to explain it but it's harder to go back#to work when ive taken a day off. like that's also why im not going in tomorrow.#friday (4/07) was the first day i worked since i got covid and that was fine but also. i was so anxious just to go in.#and so so so so tired when i got home. and all weekend.#yeah i wasn't ready to start working at the high school today. that was nonsense.#hopefully all will go well on wednesday thursday and friday of this week. im trying to restore my energy and fix my sleep. thatll do wonders#i hope. i hope i hope i hope
6 notes
·
View notes
Text
dm’ed yesterday, played cos today, listened in on some paired motw scenes today (w/out adelaide RIP I MISS HER SO MUCH BUT I COULDNT POSSIBLY RP AFTER FOUR HOURS OF D&D), will dm again tomorrow, and play some paired motw scenes monday
IM LIVING MY BEST LIFE
#ALSO THE REST OF MARCH IS GONNA BE SO FUCKING BUSY#we got like 3/4 of the way thru the motw sess and i was like: ...shit i wish i was playing despite how tired i am#i do have to get a good nights sleep tonight tho bc im dm'ing an early morning boss battle tomorrow
5 notes
·
View notes