#how often can I tell you about my love for their ship name?

[some-kind-of-creature]

God damn it, not again!(yes, again, pls, I love each and everyone of you guys who just went “Why not both?” a whole lot)

The time thing was definitely on purpose, Clockwork did not want his apprentice/son/grandchild/king/little gremlin to suffer, but the bird could use a bit of suffering(no, he could not, suffering is actually the last thing he could use, but does CW care about that? No! No, he does not!)

So suffering is what he gets.

When Dick fully enters the room Danny was held in, he sees blood on the floor and a green substance dripping from an operation table(the GIW don’t know about lab and/or health safety and definitely do not clean up after themselves)and he can only suspect the worst, especially after seeing Danny vanish in front of him with blood on his face and all over his clothes(they got him in the face, it looked way worse than it was, noses bleed like hell).

The GIW and everyone who is responsible for the Anti-Ecto Acts gets a first row seat seeing why Dick was known the most murderous of the Robins. The Acts will not last long and the people behind them even shorter.

During the demolition of the GIW, Dick, with the help of his family, tries to find any kind of information about Danny, but no matter how deep they search through the files, they can’t find anything about what happened during the last three weeks. The only report they find is the initial one about the capture of an “Ecto-contaminated Being” and nothing after that.(nothing happened, there was no time for something to happen, at least not on Danny’s end)

Dick slowly spirals deeper and deeper during his quest in finding answers.

Danny meanwhile has absolutely no idea whats going on outside of Amity Park, while trying to convince his family and friends that he is fine and can absolutely walk to the bathroom on his own, yes he is sure, fuck off Dani!

He probably attempts to flee from his family, because their overprotective mother-henning is way worse than being kidnapped by the guys in white, at least in his opinion. Also he kinda misses seeing Dick, (Okay, he really, really misses seeing the other, not that he will tell that anyone, well he will probably tell Dick… maybe) even if it wasn’t that long ago(for him, Dick would see that very different) that they had seen each other.

So when he finally makes it back to Bludhaven, Danny gets more or less tackled by a 200lb man(90kg for my fellow metric users), who then holds him in a tight hug, a hug so tight that you could practically feel the desperation and simultaneous relief the man felt in that moment.

Danny was obviously very confused and extremely concerned about Dick, especially as his shoulder started to feel wet and he could hear Dick whisper about how glad he was to see Danny again, how he was nearly sure that he would never see him again.

It seemed like they had a lot to talk about, but in this moment Danny just hugged Dick back as firmly as he could and not letting him go.

Talking could wait.

"... And yeah, that's why me and B aren't talking at the moment" Dick finished, face pressed into the cafe table, one hand playing with his cup and the other gripping Tim's hand.

"Thanks for listening." He sighed out. "Also sorry for jumping you like that and ranting-"

"Hey, it's alright, sometimes you just gotta vent for a bit." Time voice was low, and if he wasn't sitting so close Dick wouldn't be able to hear him.

He gripped his hand tighter before letting out a small chuckle. "It helped." He muttered and then sat up.

"But we should probably get home-" dick froze, looking at the person sitting with him. Black hair, blue eyes, a comforting smile on his face.

At first glance anyone would think it's Tim, but there are traces of Jason and even bruce and-

"You're not-"

"Yeah, no idea who Tim is, I'm Danny....you're going to crush my hand"

Dick let go as if the hand burnt him and blushed brightly. Oh god, he has been ranting to a complete stranger for god knows how long, has he said anything about their double life-

"Calm down, I have no clue who you are and we are probably never meeting again after this, nothing bad bout talking your issues out and all"

Tim is going to laugh at him.

[quantum1mmortality]

Captain Curly; marriage hcs <3

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Chat I know I mentioned getting back into writing for twst but the current hyperfixation is too strong rn so just bare with me I NEED to write for mouthwashing

!this is written with an AU in mind; curly still works for pony express, but there's no ship. Just a normal job. Also J***y doesn't exist.!

Tw/cw; afab!reader, mentions of pregnancy and having said baby, MANHANDLING!!!!, teasing, use of pet names, uhhh I can't think of any else

Not proofread

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Sfw

I think Curly would definitely be a family oriented person. The further you'd get into your relationship, the more he'd ask about your opinion on kids and if you'd want any in the future.

I also think Curly would be on the traditional side, too. If you said yes to having kids, he'd take that as an opportunity to show you how good of a provider he can be, and how willing he is to become a father.

When you do eventually have children, he'd be more than willing to take off work to help around the house. You just gave birth, he knows it's hard for you, so he'd make breakfast, lunch, and dinner for all three of you.

Sidenote; Curly would definitely be a good cook. He probably took culinary in highschool

If he knew Anya at the time, he'd have her babysit your children so he could take you out on dates. This happens quite often, too; probably around once or twice a month. He just wants to show how much he appreciates you and everything you've done for him and your relationship <3

He'd take you to the most expensive restaurants and tell you to order whatever you wanted, and if you're done breastfeeding, he'd order a bottle of champagne for you both.

He'd be one of those "I love my wife" husbands. Everyone at his job is so sick of hearing him talk so highly of you. It'll be someone's birthday, they'll bring a cake, and he just won't eat it. Why? "My wife could make a better cake."

After you guys got married, he couldn't stop calling you his wife. That name felt so surreal to him; like the woman of his dreams is finally his? And there's a title for that?? Of course he's going to use it constantly.

He probably also took Anya out to help him pick out a ring. And thank god he did btw because he would've gotten you a ring with the biggest diamond they had 😭😭 (sorry to all the big ring lovers in chat rn they're just not it for me)

Nsfw

Curly is a romantic. He'd want to take things slow, cherish you as much as possible, especially if it's your first time.

He wouldn't think of it as sex, he'd think of it as lovemaking; showing you his worth and how much he cares about you.

He rarely gets rough, you have to ask him to be because he just won't do it. But, he's a suck up for you, so if you want something, it's yours.

So, he'd get rough. He'd go faster than he usually does, maybe put his hand around your neck and squeeze ever so gently. But afterwards, he'd feel awful; like he was hurting you or something.

He'd apologize profusely, say he's never gonna do it again, but does it a few days later. It's like going through the five stages of grief but skipping the first four and consistently being at acceptance

He's a hand holder. Since he's an intimate person, his preferred position is missionary. He likes this position for a few reasons; he gets to see your expression if you're enjoying it or uncomfortable, he gets to kiss you, and he can hold your hand. It's one of his favorite things to do, not only because he finds it much more romantic, but he also loves how you squeeze his hand when you're getting close.

Teasing is one of the things he does best. But verbal teasing, not physical. You can hear him giggle anytime he's inside you, practically taunting you when he knows you're close. He'd say something dumb like, "aw, is princess gonna cum?" And then have a shit eating grin on his face.

Pet names are another thing he uses often. Like I said previously, he'd call you princess, but there's also other names he'd call you during the act. Love, darling, and angel are the ones he uses for you most commonly, aside from princess of course.

I saw someone else say this on here and their hcs were actually what made me want to write (I swear on my SOUL I am NOT trying to copy them 🙏🙏🙏🙏 sorry if it comes off like that) but they said Curly would be buff and I completely agree. He would be HUGE, I'm thinking 6'3-6'5, easily over 220lbs.

The manhandling would go CRAZY, you don't like a position? No issue, he'll just pick you up and put you in a different one. Can't keep your legs open while he's being a munch? As much as he enjoys the feeling of suffocating between your thighs, which believe me, he does, he can't exactly pleasure you if he's unconscious from the lack of airflow. Not a big issue, a firm hand on each leg will do the trick.

Another comment on his body alone to wrap this up; he'd definitely be muscular in his legs and especially his arms. I think his stomach would be toned, not a six pack, but toned. Maybe even a little pudge and a v line 🤭🤭🤭🤭🤭

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A/N: hi guys pls send requests for curly fics plasplsplspslsplsplslsplspls I'm so thirsty for this man oh ky god I'm crynng

[seungfl0wer]

Jeongin As Your Boyfriend

Bangchan | Minho | Changbin | Hyunjin | Han | Felix | Seungmin | Jeongin

Contains Smut 🩷

-🩵

•I feel like he’s very nervous, especially at first.

•Constantly checking on you making sure anything he does is ok.

•Like kissing. He’s gonna ask you if “it’s ok” to kiss you.

•Because he’s afraid of making you uncomfortable.

•When y’all get past that phase he’s still asking sometimes however he goes for it more often than not.

•He’s not super big into skin ship.

•However that does not mean he’s not ever gonna touch you of course.

•Holding hands is his favorite.

•Or wrapping his arms around you in a back hug.

•He’s not into PDA so if you try to kiss him around the others.

•He’s gonna turn bright red.

•He’s very reserved in my opinion.

•I feel like since he likes fashion so much he’d honestly like those couple outfits.

•Not the “I love my boyfriend” shirts.

•But like same color shirts and stuff just simple cute couple fits.

•Will have you in his OOTD’s especially when y’all matching.

•Absolutely loves seeing you in his clothes too.

•Ugh it just melts him. Finds it so endearing.

•Has a playlist of songs that remind him of you.

•Loves taking you to different places with him so you can experience them with him.

•Teases you of course.

•However he’s very mindful and sometimes can overthink what he says.

•He’s just afraid of hurting your feelings.

•Cuddles.

•Like I said he’s not a big touchy person however.

•When you’re sleeping he’s pulling you so close.

•Tells you all the time how it’s hard to sleep without you.

•Sings trots songs for you.

•Likes karaoke dates a lot too.

•Will definitely send you pictures of their concepts before it’s out.

•He can’t keep things from you.

•It’s really hard for him to keep secrets even if it’s something like a present or surprise.

•He just tells you everything so it’s hard for him not to tell you these exciting things.

•Clumsy.

•You joke how you need to put him in a bubble.

•Or bubble wrap the house at least.

•He loves taking pictures of you too.

•Changes his background so much cause he takes such cute pictures of you.

•No matter how long y’all date for he’s still smiling when he sees your name pop up on his phone.

•Even old and grey he’s still all giddy with you cause he loves you.

•I feel like after he lets his wall down he falls really hard.

•His love is so very genuine.

•He’s just a soft guy under those fox eyes, whose only mission is to make you smile.

•To make you happy and to feel loved and he’ll always be there to do so.

︵‿︵‿୨Smut Below୧‿︵‿︵

•Again this man’s still a bit nervous.

•He lets you take the lead a lot.

•But when he gets comfortable you’ll see the real jeongin.

•He’s very much a switch.

•Loves when you take care of him.

•Calling him your “Sweet baby” makes him go crazy.

•Whimpers so much when he’s like this.

•”I’ve been so good for you please-“

•Morning blow jobs to wake him up.

•Lazy morning sex too.

•You’re still half asleep when he’s pushing himself between your legs.

•His head in the crook of your neck whimpering how he “needs you so much”

•When you respond he’s losing it.

•Lubing you up before pushing into your sweetness.

•On the other hand he can be very aggressive.

•A lot of the times it’s when he’s stressed.

•He’ll have you face down as up as he pounds deep into you.

•Those big beautiful hands leaving hand prints on your ass.

•Loves sneaking you into the dorms.

•Telling you how you “have to stay quiet”

•Gets off on the thought of the others hearing how good he’s making you feel.

•Also those hands I mentioned?

•The way he pushes them into your sweet hole it just-

•He curls them so perfectly hitting every sweet spot.

•He knows how much you like his pretty hands.

•Teases you about how you fall apart on them.

•Aftercare is a lot for him.

•He is always concerned he hurt you or pushed you too far.

•Constant “are you ok?”

•Runs to grab you towels, snacks and drinks.

•Just wants to make sure you’re completely ok.

💙 If you’d like to read more of my stuff you can find it Here: Master List . Thank you for reading and if requests are open or you just wanna talk feel free to send me something

[shy-writer-999]

OP Headcanons: Monster Trio on the Phone

WARNING: MINORS DNI. NSFW CONTENT.

A/N: Descriptions of how the monster trio would act during a (spicy) session on the phone. (+ what they’d say to afab reader)

Zoro: The Pretender

Zoro looks at your nudes so much that he gets worked up and needs help. He’ll call you late at night. In the privacy of his own cabin, he can groan as loud as he likes. When Zoro calls you, he’s sitting on his bed, propped up on the wall, fisting his cock at the thought of you riding him. He’s shirtless and his black boxer briefs are pulled down so he has enough access to touch himself. Zoro imagines how wet and hot your cunt is when it’s wrapped around his shaft and thinks about how your tits bounce in his face when you’re straddling him.

Zoro just pretends you’re having sex, and he will say the exact same things on the phone that he says when he fucks you… but instead of fucking you, he fucks his fist. He adjusts his grip slightly and plays with his tip so it feels just right. What gets Zoro going the most is to hear your soft moans and whines through the phone, to think of the fact that you’re getting off at the thought of him, too. He thinks it’s hot that you’ll drop everything for him when he calls you in the late hours of the night. Zoro’s voice is dripping with desire, coated in desperation already, trying to retain some of his dignity when he needily says he’s touching himself and wants you to do the same.

When Zoro’s worked up and having phone sex, these are the things he says between his deep grunts and groans:

“Want to hear your voice so bad… Will you touch yourself for me?” “’M hard already, wanna hear you say my name” “Fuck, need your pussy so bad” “Does my cock feel good?” (this is when he starts gets carried away by fantasy) “Fucckkkk, take it all for me” “Bounce on my cock just like that” “Your pussy feels amazing” “Feels so good on my cock baby” “Wanna cum in you”

After he’s done pretending like he just railed you, he gets a bit sheepish because he was so carried away. He cleans his cum off his hands and lower abdomen. Zoro loves that you humor him. The next time he sees you, he’s extra lovey-dovey. He’ll give you a tight hug and a forehead kiss and whisper “thanks babe” sweetly in your ear.

Sanji: The Dirty Talker

Sanji calls you first; some nights he just can’t get you out of his mind and if you’re not on the ship, he has to do something about it. When he calls you, Sanji is laying down on his bed, naked and hard already, with his thighs spread wide. One hand trails up his abs and across his chest (he’s imagining that it’s your hand) and the other leisurely strokes his cock as he says filthy things to you. Sanji’s goal is to get you just as horny as he is—and he usually succeeds. He imagines you teasing your own clit and folds, getting wet and vulnerable for him. Sanji wants to know that you want him too. Often, Sanji prioritizes how you’re feeling over his own pleasure. He thinks it’s special that you’re comfortable enough with him to do this, and his heart does a flip every time he hears even the most muted puff of breath or soft mewl through the phone.

 Sanji likes it when you describe what you’re doing and what you’re feeling. He eats it up every time you say, “feels good, Sanji” or “I want your cock so bad, Sanji.” Similarly, he likes telling you what to do, but in the event that you take the reins, he all but loses his mind. He’s partial to telling you to “put one finger in, my darling,” and also will use those lovely pet names to say the filthiest things, like “fuck yourself with your fingers, sweetie,” or “do you want my cock inside of you, my love?” When you moan Sanji’s name sweetly, he thinks he’ll pass out from the deadly combination of pleasure and butterflies. He likes to take his time while he strokes himself, milking as much precum from his cock as he can. Sanji doesn’t want to cum until after you have, and then when he gets close to climax he’ll start whimpering and whining.

This is what Sanji says when he's getting nasty on the phone:

“My love, I’m thinking about you…” “I want you to rub your clit just for me, get all wet and sloppy” “Touching yourself for me over the phone, baby, so fucking hot” “I want to hear you, my love” “Doing such a good job, sweetheart” “Does it feel good?” “Wish I could fuck you right now” “Want you to cream on my cock” “Feels fucking amazing” “I like to hear you moan, angel”

It’s Sanji’s guilty pleasure to cum on his own stomach and imagine you licking off every last drop. His heart is full afterwards and he can’t wait to see you. Before he hangs up the phone, he says thank you. He reminds you of how much he loves you, reminds again, calls you “my love,” and “my dear,” and then he refuses to hang up first. He can’t get enough of you.

Luffy: Utterly Clueless

*First time writing for Luffy – not sure if I did him any justice. I took a different direction for this one, it's a bit nasty... and longer than the others. Includes some dumb p0rn logic lol

You call Luffy first, already worked up, holding your thighs together in an attempt to stop your core from throbbing. Luffy is initially clueless, as he’s never done phone sex before, but he gets so turned on when finally realizes what’s happening—and then he goes all in. Luffy is laying on his bed, fully clothed, on his back with his head hanging off the foot of the bed. When he answers the phone, his voice is chipper and friendly, like usual.

“Luffy,” you whine. “I’m feeling warm between my legs…”

“Oh, are you okay?” Luffy is unfazed, wondering why you called him about it.

“I think so, but I want it to stop.” You sound distressed. “What should I do?”

“Have you, uh… tried checking out what’s going on down there?” He’s confused.

You pause and answer with a whimper. “Yeah, it’s all wet and tingly.”

Luffy responds in all sincerity. “Oh… Why don’t you touch it? Maybe that will help.” His mental gears start turning.

“O-okay… I will…” Your hands sneak down into your underwear. When your fingers hit your wet folds, you let out a barely audible moan. “Lufffyyy, it’s hot and sticky.”

Luffy can feel himself starting to get hard—the idea of you with your fingers in your panties letting out needy sounds is starting to get him off. His heartbeat quickens and he runs a palm over his growing erection. He isn’t quite sure why it’s turning him on this much, but he can’t stop because it feels so good.

“Is it helping?” His voice is starting to sound gruff.

“Mmhmm,” you hummed out. “I’m rubbing my fingers on it, feels good.” Luffy’s heart skips a beat, and he grinds his palm down harder.

“Well, if it’s helping then you better not stop,” he responds, his muscles tensing up as his cock becomes rock hard. It’s starting to form a tent in his shorts, he increases the pressure of his palm and the friction makes him feel like he’s on fire.

“Okay, I won’t stop…” your voice trails off and he can hear you pant as you pass your fingers up and down your wet folds, brushing your sensitive spot and toying with your own slit. You slip a finger in and out, increasing the speed.

A few moments of silence go by. Luffy keeps rubbing himself. “Are you still there, Y/N?”

You answer him with a moan that turns into a “Mmmhmm—fuuucckkkkkk.”

“What are you doing, Y/N?” He rasps, voice deepening—he thinks he knows the answer. His cock is throbbing and you’ve slipped in a second finger.

“I-I’m pushing my fingers in and out, Luffy,” you keen, breathless. His mouth goes dry. You moan again, your tone increasing in desperation. “Wish it was you instead.”

He feels his heart stop for a moment. Luffy is so turned on that he pushes his shorts down and brings his cock out, precum already beading on his tip. He starts tugging on his length, letting out a soft grunt. You were fingering yourself right now and he could hear it. He feels like he is going feral. Something about you always makes him feel weird inside. He gets aroused whenever you’re around—it’s never happened to him with anybody else. He catches himself staring at your ass and tits whenever he can. He can’t get you out of his mind.

Luffy starts to stroke his cock harder. Pleasure is rippling down his shaft and into his core, and he’s starting to let out his own sounds of need. “Y/N,” he grunts your name out. “Keep telling me w-what you’re doing.”

“I-I, Luffyyy, my fingers feel so good, so wet” you moan, toes curling in pleasure as your fingers curl inside of yourself. You pull them out and plunge them in with increasing speed and Luffy’s speed increases, too. “Want your cock so bad, Luffy. Need you inside.”

His hand squeezes tighter and tighter, jerking his cock up and down, hips bucking up into his fist. He feels like he’s going crazy, his speed becomes frantic, frenzied. When he hears you moan his name again, he groans. “Nnnnggghhhhhh, Y/N, I feel—Feel like I’m c-cumming, fuuuuccckkk.”

With one last, shuddering thrust upward into his own fist, Luffy proceeds to cum all over himself. You finish almost immediately after. The next time you see him, he’s blushing and says that he wants to do it again.

(o˘◡˘o) (っ˘ω˘ς )

Thanks for reading!! I hope u liked it :3

PART 2 UP NOW! Ft. Law The Instructor and Ace The Sweet Talker!

and here's my masterlist if ur interested

[floatyflowers]

Dark Husbands! Vampire, Merman, and Faerie x Human! Reader

Merman

Azure is very protective of you, his human wife, you, and he doesn't like it when other humans or merfolk try to get close. 

He will wrap his tail around you, glare at the intruders, and growl softly to warn them off. 

Also marks you with his scent and bites, to show that you belong to him.

The merman is fascinated by your culture and customs, and he wants to learn everything about them. 

He asks you many questions, listen to your stories, and try to imitate your actions actions.

 He will also collect various human objects that he finds in the sea, and give them to you as gifts. 

Makes you drink a potion every week so you can breathe underwater.

He will be very proud and happy when you praise him for his efforts.

Azure is very affectionate and attentive, and he loves to pamper you.

By bringing you fresh fish, seaweed, and pearls, and make you a cozy nest in his underwater cave.

The merman prince massages you with his hands and tail, sing to you with his beautiful voice, and cuddle with you for hours. 

Will tell you how much he loves you, and how lucky he is to have you

The merman is very curious and adventurous, and he likes to explore the ocean with you.

 He will show you the wonders of the sea, such as coral reefs, sunken ships, and exotic creatures. 

Azure teaches you how to swim, breathe underwater, and communicate with marine animals.

Very protective of you during your journeys, and will  make sure that you are safe and comfortable.

He will be very upset if you ever him alone, or decide to go back to the surface world. 

In the end, he convinces you that the ocean is better than the land, and that he is the only one who can make you happy.

"I want you to carry my eggs"

Vampire

Dracula is very cruel and sadistic, and he enjoys torturing you.

He will bite and scratch you with his sharp nails while being intamate with you.

The king of vampires will also force you to drink his blood, which will make you sick for days.

Might mock and humiliate you, just to try and break your spirit.

Your vampire husband is very arrogant and selfish, but he cares about your financial needs.

 Never ignores you nor neglect you, because you are always on his mind.

Will lock you up in his mansion, isolate you from the outside world, and monitor your every move. 

Using his powers to, he compels you with his mind, erase your memories, and manipulate your emotions. 

He will make you dependent on him and loyal to him.

Dracula is very dangerous and unpredictable, and he likes to play games with you. 

By challenging, testing and tricking you, He will never let you know what he is thinking or feeling, or what he is going to do next. 

He makes sure you fear him and crave him.

"I might turn you, very soon, my dear"

Faerie

Your husband, Zephyr, tricked you into marrying him, how? You may ask.

He simply told you his real name.

You see, the only ones who know Faeries's real names are their parents.

So, when a Faerie tells a human their name, it is like marriage in their world.

Yeah, that's how you ended up marrying your Faerie husband.

Zephyr kidnapped took you back with him to his realm to live in his home, which is now yours.

He is very romantic and loves to surprise you with little gifts and tokens of his affection. Zephyr often brings you flowers or other small trinkets that he has found on his travels.

However, he turns nasty when he is jealous, after all, faerie creatures are naturally born evil and deceiving.

So, when he sees some faeries bullying you for your appearance.

He murders them in the most vicious way right in front of your eyes.

Something which traumatized you.

The fact that he didn't get punished is because simply he is the Faerie's king nephew.

"Don't worry, my love, no one is going to ever make fun of your appearance again"

[genericpuff]

holy crap okay so

I'm two episodes into Kaos

normally I keep my expectations pretty minimal because, let's be real, the Internet - and especially Tumblr - has a tendency to severely overhype new series to be way better than they actually are and it often leaves me sitting there like "that's it? that's what people were freaking out over for weeks?? that was just a bunch of cheap ships and tropes that i've seen 123785902380 times before" LMAO

BUT thankfully compared to other series like Hazbin Hotel and The Amazing Digital Circus, I haven't been worn out on excessive fandom exposure prior to watching Kaos, so I didn't really know what to expect going in besides what folks have told me so far - it's a modern-day Greek epic, and it stars Jeff Goldblum as Zeus (which is, unsurprisingly, peak casting).

That said, I'm very pleased to say that so far, the show is absolutely blowing me away. The set designs, characterizations, weaving of all the players into a central narrative led by a very coy narrator, all of it feels both refreshing and respectful to the source material at the same time.

so uh yeah that LO animated TV show... we have reason to believe now that it's gotten picked up by Amazon Prime, at least according to the showrunner's LinkedIn and posting history from February of this year that seems to imply LO may have been picked up by Amazon-

(but still, nothing's really been confirmed because they're being so tight-lipped about this you'd almost think it's because there isn't a show happening at all cough)

But even then, that means at best we still won't see anything of the LO TV show adaption for another 2-3 years, depending on how production goes.

Why am I talking about LO right now? Well it should be obvious - Kaos double-whammied LO by beating it to the punch at its own game.

I mean, just look at the creative choices alone in the design of the Underworld and its rulers, our beloved Hades and Persephone.

And yes, the entire Underworld is color-graded like this, something so simple and yet effective in communicating the nature of the Underworld and what it stands for - a place where the past lives on through the dead, paused in time, devoid of the vibrant color grading found in Olympus - or "Olympia" as its been named in this retelling - which is, by the way, a visual treat to take in every time it's featured.

(and yes, that is S-tier-companion Billie Piper on the left, but I will not tell you who she's playing, you actually really should go into this show as blind as possible for the thrill of figuring out these characters as they're introduced <3)

That's not even getting into the narrative structure of the plot itself or the phenomenal casting and acting, but again, I don't want to spoil too much as the show is quite new, and I want to actually finish watching the show myself before I get more into the details of its story and how it delivers it (I'm very much hoping I will still be singing this show's praises at the end of its 8 episodes, please for the love of god don't jump the shark, I don't think my heart can take that kind of pain again.)

All that's to say though, Kaos is, so far, exactly what us disappointed fans of LO deserve after all these years, and frankly, I feel like whatever is coming for the LO animated TV show is really gonna have to step up to the plate to both live up to the bar that Kaos has set as well as stand on its own without being affiliated as a cheap Amazon knockoff living in its shadow. Sounds a little familiar and a bit ironic, doesn't it?

[nyarlathotep-thecrawlingchaos]

You guys really got me to one thousand likes in less than two days.

I don't even know what's happening but it's pulling me out of a really awful writer's block.

I have more ideas than I know what to do with so expect a good bit of content in the future.

You're all incredible 💗 ❤️

Have some Shanks headcanons, ranging from fluffy to spicy. As a treat.

I was a little iffy about Live Action Shanks at first, since he was literally my first manga/anime crush ever. But he grew on me more with every scene.

Especially that final scene where he saw Luffy's wanted poster. I mean....

Lookit that smile 🥹

So anyway.

LA!Shanks X Fem!Reader

Shanks A — Z

A — Afterglow (How are they after sex?)

Holding you close and telling you how much he adores you.

He's going to give you anything you want. Anything.

"Do you need anything, sweetheart? I've got you."

You want a bath, he's going to run it for you, carry you there once it's ready, and help you bathe.

Food or a drink, you just lay down, he's got it.

Shanks is completely and utterly devoted to making you feel like a goddess after sex.

Showering you with soft, tender kisses and caresses and endless praise, rubbing his fingers between your wet folds to prolong your pleasure as long as possible.

If it seems like he's trying to coax you into another round, he probably is. Your're going to have to outright tell him you're if spent, because he can't get enough of you.

B — Backrubs? (Do they like them? Like giving them?)

You can expect it nightly. You're his princess and he's going to pamper you.

He might only have one hand, but dear gods those fingers are magic.

He's not asking anything in return, but if you're offering then he isn't going to turn you down.

Closing his eyes and groaning as your fingers work through the tension in his muscles.

"Oh, you're too good for me, love."

C — Cuddling (Do they enjoy cuddling a lot ot only at certain moments?)

If you're within arm's reach, then Shanks has his arm around you.

His main mode of affection is physical.

Pulling you you to his side, resting his head over yours, tugging you down onto his lap.

He wants you close, as much and as often as you're willing to be, and he does't give a damn who sees.

D — Dance (Are they good at it? Do they enjoy it?)

Not really big on dancing, but if you want to he isn’t going to turn you down.

He'll take any excuse he can get to hold you close.

Tucking your hair behind your ear so he can rest his temple against yours.

His arm curled loosely around your back.

E — Extravagant Gestures (Things they do to make you feel loved)

He would literally move mountains for you if he could.

You tell him your dreams, well now they're his dreams too.

Anything you accomplish, whether alone or with his help, warrants the most lavish of celebrations.

He isn’t particularly materialistic, but what his princess wants, she gets, no questions asked.

"If you wanted the moon, I would make this ship fly so you could stake your claim."

F — Fighting (How do they hand arguments/apologies?)

All puppy-dog eyes and pouts.

Shanks makes it impossible to stay mad at him for any reasonable length of time. He's just too damned adorable.

Wrapping an arm around you and laying his head on your shoulder, refusing to let you go until you listen.

Even if it's a serious argument, the look of utter heartbreak on his face makes you cave every time.

"Come on, sweetheart. Just name it, I'll do anything."

He isn’t too proud to apologize—he knows when he's in the wrong, and he'll do anything in his power to make it up to you.

G — Going Out (What do they do for dates?)

If Shanks is the one doing the planning, you can expect to end up one of two places.

You might be at the nearest tavern, going shot for shot on rum until you can't see straight, singing sea shanties into the dark hours of morning.

Or laid out on a secluded stretch of beach in the moonlight, sharing a bottle or two, wrapped up in each others' arms and lips and forgetting the passage of time entirely.

He's happy doing anything that means he gets to spend time with you, though, so he's fine with going out of his element if you have something else in mind.

H — Heartache (How would they handle it if you broke up with them?)

Don't. Please. Just don't. He'll be inconsolable.

He'll cry. Don't make Shanks cry. That's just heartless.

He won't show it in front of his crew. He'll keep up his usual carefree and aloof facade.

But once he's alone, he'll be in complete shambles.

He'll probably drink himself senseless.

He loves hard, with every fabric of his being, and losing you would utterly destroy him.

I — Intimacy (When are they intimate with you? And how often?)

Literally all the time.

Shanks always kisses you like no one's watching, pulling you flush against him and delving his tongue between your lips and squeezing your rear.

In his eyes, there's no wrong time to show how much he treasures you. How much he wants you.

His ship could be under fire by a full Marine armada and he would still pull you in for a slow, sweet kiss if the mood struck.

In fact he'd probably do it just to show the Marines how completely unbothered he is.

J — Joker (How do they make you laugh)

If Shanks isn't cracking some stupid joke, you're worried something is wrong.

He loves making people laugh, loves seeing people laughing and enjoying life.

And making *you* laugh? That gives him life.

He's gone far as to pull your panties on while you're alone together in the captain's cabin and imitate you being dramatic about something until you're begging him to stop before you choke to death on your own giggles.

K — Kissing (How good? How often?)

If you're within eyeshot, he *has* to kiss you.

He knows that his crew will roll their eyes and tease him about it, but he doesn't care. Your lips are like a drug and he simply can't get enough.

His kisses tend to be light and plauful.

Lightly biting and pulling at your bottom lip.

Flicking his tongue across lips to coax yours out.

Letting his tongue swirl slowly around yours before pulling back and leaving you craving more.

Pulling you into his lap when he deepens the kiss.

Lifting his hand to flip off anyone with the audacity to tell you two to get a room.

"Don't pay them any mind, princess. They're just a bunch of jealous pricks."

L — Lay down (How do they sleep with you? Are they a cuddler or do they prefer their space?)

He has to be against you in bed.

If you roll away in your sleep, he will subconsciously shift closer to you.

Spooning is definitely his favorite—your back and your ass pressed up against him, his arm draped over your waist so he can caress your stomach or lay his palm over one of your soft breasts...absolute *heaven*.

M — Making babies (Do they want to settle down and have kids?)

Shanks is good with kids, being that he's practically an overgrown kid himself half the time.

All the same, he just...isn’t sure.

He loves you to death. Having a family with you would be a dream come true.

But if he had to leave his ship, his crew behind? He just isn’t sure he could do that.

Because he loves them to death, too.

N — Nervous? (How confident are they when it comes to romance?)

Shanks posseses the positively deadly combination of being unnecessarily charming and handsome, and incredibly aware of it.

Thus, his confidence is through the roof.

He knows he doesn't need anything more than a cheeky grin and a soft carress or two to get you in bed.

That being said, he'll spend all day subtly teasing you to the end of your sanity to make sure you want him as much as it's possible to want another person.

O — Oral Fixation (Giving or recieving? And how good are they?)

Absolutely a giver. He's incredible at it and he knows it.

And he's a terrible, terrible tease about it.

Taking you to the edge, making your thighs tremble...and then pulling away to brush his lips to your thighs and give you a cheeky grin.

"Oh, not yet, love. I love hearing you beg for it."

Keeping you on the edge until you're begging to come in complete and utter desperation before he finally lets you.

And then he isn't going to stop until you're begging him to.

He loves recieving just as much.

Really loves it when you pull him down an empty alley and get on your knees.Curling his fingers in your hair, groaning quietly and praising you endlessly.

His breath shaking as he resists the urge to thrust his hips forward and fuck your throat, wanting to enjoy the slow build-up.

"That's it, sweetheart. Look at me. I want to see those pretty eyes while you suck my cock."

P — Pet Peeves (Things they don't like in a partner)

Taking things too seriously. He's always joking around and having a good time, and all he wants is for you to do the same.

The silent treatment. It drives him absolutely insane. Just talk to him if there's something wrong, he wants to fix it.

Flirting with other men to make him jealous. Just don't. It's the one thing that truly gets under his skin, that could actually get him honestly angry with you.

Q — Quiet Time (How much alone time do they need, or do they want to be with you 24/7?)

Gives you your distance if you need it, but he does so begrudgingly.

He knows life is short—he got his arm bit off by a giant sea monster, for gods' sake—and he wants to spend as much time as he can with you.

Whether you're out having fun, fighting alongside each other, or curled up together in a hammock sharing a bottle of rum and enjoying a lazy afternoon.

He loves being with you, and he'll take any excuse he can get.

R — Romance (How romantic are they? Do they have to force it or does it come natural?)

Shanks's version of romance isn't fancy dinners and extravagant date nights.

It's lying on a beach watching the sunset with you.

Pushing you into the water and diving in after you, kissing you while you're both sopping wet.

Making love under a full moon.

Telling you every opportunity he gets how much he adores you.

"You know you're my greatest treasure, don't you, sweetheart?"

It's hard not to know when he tells you at least three times a day.

But the way he looks into your eyes when he says it still manages to melt your heart every time.

S — Spending Money (How much do they like to spend on you?)

Shanks isn't really much for materialism or consumerism.

You'll have to tell him if there's something you want, and he's not going to have any oroblem with getting it for you.

Every so often, something is going to catch his eye at some market in a port town.

Something that reminds him of you or that he thinks you'll like.

And he'll buy it without hesitation and give it to you with a big, goofy grin the second he sees you.

It's not all the time, but it makes it that much more special when it does happen.

T — Trust (Are they trusting of you? Jealous?)

He absolutely trusts you—that's how love is supposed to work.

But he can get a little jealous.

You wouldn't know it from the way he carries himself and jokes about it, but he does get a little insecure about missing an entire limb.

This can lead to him getting a little defensive and possessive if other men approach you—he's going to make sure it's known that you're his lover, and he'll always fight for you.

U — Underwear (What kind do they wear, and what kind do they like on you?)

Loose-fitting boxers are more comfortable.

He doesn't care what kind of underwear you wear, as long as it comes off easily.

And if you whisper in his ear that you're *not* wearing any?

You'd best buckle up, because he's putting you over his shoulder and carrying you off to the nearest private, or even semi-private location he can find to take advantage of this information.

V — Vulnerable (How vulnerable are they with you? Is it easy for them to open up to you?)

He is one hundred percent an open book with you.

You know everything about him. His life, his secrets, his aspirations.

He doesn't want anything to ever come up that could frighten you off, so he lays everything on the table surprisingly quickly.

W — Wine and Dine (Do they prefer meals at home or going out with you? Who does more of the cooking?)

He would much rather cook, preferably with you. He's not the best at it, but he's not awful either, given that he's had to be self-sufficient for a good bit of his life.

And if you're good at it, he's not to proud to take advice.

Any time spent with you is a wonderful time to him.

If you go out, it's probably going to be street food or tavern fare—fancy restaurants aren't his forte, and he's frankly not sure he would even have anything appropriate to wear.

X — X-Rated (How good are they in bed? What do they like?)

Hopefully you like being teased literally to the edge of sanity.

Major kink for edging you, making you beg for it.

And dear sweet fuck, is he good at it.

Whispering all the things he's going to do to you throughout the course of the day.

Pulling you down an alley or into a broom closet, pinning you to the wall and teasing you through your panties, stopping just short of letting you cum.

Subtle glances and touches.

He *loves* seeing you writhing in his bed, desperate for his touch while he kisses your neck, just trailing his fingertips up and down your inner thigh.

Holding you down by your hips so you can't even grind against him.

"Such an eager little thing. Just be patient, princess. You're going to get what you want."

Kissing down your breasts, taking time to stop and tease your nipples.

Pushing your thighs apart with his knees so he can circle a finger around your entrance, chuckling a little at your moans and whimpers before finally pushing it in.

Sitting up on his knees to watch you arch your hips, rubbing against your g-spot just long enough to get you gasping.

Pulling his finger back out and slowly circling it around your clit instead, before shifting back between your thighs and giving the sensitive bud a few teasing licks, watching you shiver in anticipation.

Keeping it slow and sensual, enjoying every second of being between your thighs, building your pleasure at a slow and steady pace that drives you crazy.

Holding onto your hip keep you from grinding against his tongue.

Pulling back the second you crest toward orgasm, chuckling at your whimpering and begging as he trails his lips across your inner thigh.

"You're just so adorable when you're desperate for it."

Keeping it going for what feels like hours, before finally tugging you in close and not relenting until you're trembling and falling apart beneath him.

Feeling you throbbing under his tongue and tighten up around his fingers is like a high for him.

Not stopping until your body goes limp and the only sounds you can make are a few little whimpers.

Soft, tender kisses amd whispered praises at your neck and lips and shoulders, his fingers combing through your hair, letting you recover for just a minute, even though he's aching for you.

Grinding his cock against your wet folds a few times before sliding slowly into you, groaning quietly in your ear.

"Oh, fuck, you're tight, love..."

Absolutely savors every second of being inside you, moving in long slow strokes, brushing his thumb across your cheek while he kisses you.

If you ask for it harder, he's going to give it to you—he's done with teasing you now. This is about you now, about what his princess wants.

And if you want it rough, then you're coming out of it with your neck and chest half-covered in hickies, and he's not stopping until he's sure you won't be able to walk tomorrow morning.

Holding back just long enough so you can climax at the same time, grunting out a quiet swear and pulling your hips flush against his to come deep inside you.

Slow, deep kisses while you both catch your breath and come down.

But don't be surprised if he's gearing up for another round soon. He really can never get enough of you.

Y — Yearning (How long will they pursue the person they're interested in before losing interest?)

It depends. If it's purely lust based, he's not going to pursue it very long and just move on.

If the feelings run deeper, though, he's absolutely shameless about it.

Relentless flirting and corny pick-up lines.

"Pardon me miss—do you have a map? It seems I've gotten lost in your eyes and I can’t find my way out."

Will absolutely get on his knees and beg you to give him a chance if he has to.

Puppy dog eyes in full effect.

It's pretty much pointless trying to resist.

Z — Zen (What do they do to wind down and relax? Do they prefer to do it alone or with you?)

A bottle of rum, a hammock stretched between a couple palm trees on some remote beach only he knows about, and his arm curled around you while you lie back against his chest.

Kissing your temple and playing with your hair.

He's always more relaxed when he has you with him.

[sunshinehaze1]

So Long, Too Soon

Pairing: Joel Miller x f!reader

Summary: It’s been so long since you and Joel have had sex. When you finally find the time to reconnect, things happen a little too soon.

Warnings: 18+, MDNI. No outbreak AU. established relationship (married), use of pet names (darlin’, baby, big guy), allusion to m!masturbation, Joel in grey sweatpants and a plain white T 🫠, f!oral, fingering, use of vibrator, unprotected PiV, creampie, no use of Y/N

a/n: This was written for @justagalwhowrites Joel Miller Birthday Celebration. I picked a combo of dad!Joel and a lil bit feral!Joel (he’s horny, y’all) with the theme of premature ejaculation. I had been noodling on the idea of a “dry spell” within an established relationship for a bit and thought it would work with this challenge. Thank you to @80ssong for the beta and constant encouragement! 😘

word count: 3,608

ao3 | ml

“SARAH! Hurry up, your dad is waiting in his truck!” 

“I’m coming!” you hear her call from her bedroom. “I had to get my math homework,” she huffs as she bounds down the stairs and into the kitchen. 

She gallops toward you and wraps you in a bear hug. Instinctively, your hands wrap around her and kiss the crown of her head. “Love you,” she says as she hurries to meet her dad; having been with him for the last fifteen years, you know his patience is hanging on by a thread. He has a short window to drop Sarah off at school to beat the worst of Austin’s morning rush hour and make it to the job site on time. 

“Love you too!” you shout back. You wince as the front door slams behind her. You’ve lost count of how often you’ve asked her not to do that.  

With your first coffee down, you drag yourself to the life-giving machine to pour another cup into your favorite mug. It was a Mother's Day gift from Sarah when she was six. Joel took her to a paint-your-own pottery studio during one of their “daddy-daughter” days. When they came home, Sarah barreled through the door with a mischievous glint in her eyes and a massive smile. You watched, amused, as your daughter bounced around, unable to contain her excitement. Animatedly, she tells you about her day with Joel, which started with a large stack of pancakes for breakfast and a movie. She recounted the day so quickly that Joel was worried that if she kept going, she’d accidentally spoil the surprise. He rested his hands on her shoulders with a low shush. His calm demeanor and soothing touch instantly relaxed her. He reminded Sarah that she had to be patient and, for the time being, had to keep a secret. You looked at him questioningly, and he shrugged. He smirked as he moved his index finger and thumb across his lips, motioning that they were sealed. A few weeks later, you would finally unwrap your surprise. Since then, it has been like no other mug ever existed. It delights you every morning, admiring the colorful hand-painted flowers and “World’s Best Mom” scrawled across the mug’s surface. 

For six months or so, you and Joel have been like ships that pass in the night. Joel’s contracting business continues to grow and has him running around all over Austin. Some weeks, he’s put in seventy hours and has just enough energy to shower before he climbs into bed where you’re sat upright with your laptop, working tirelessly on your latest project with a looming deadline. He graces you with a peck on the cheek before he rolls on his side, and within minutes, you hear the low drone of his snores. In the mornings, you exchange kisses and “I love yous” when he comes downstairs to grab his coffee before he’s out the door with Sarah, and you relocate to your home office for the day. 

You hope there is a light at the end of the tunnel soon. Even if you have to dig the tunnel yourself to find it, it’s been too long since you and Joel have had sex, and you’re not sure how much more you can take. You crave the intimacy of being close to your husband, skin-to-skin. It invigorates you, seals your love, and makes you feel more connected. You worry he could be losing his attraction to you. You’ve been together for over a decade, which is a long time for your bodies to change. He seems to have only gotten more annoyingly handsome while your body has grown and pushed out a healthy, brilliant, funny girl, and things aren’t as tight as they once were. Parts of your body are softer and have a tendency to spread a little more when you sit down. 

You and Joel have always had a fulfilling sex life. When you first got together, there was hardly a day where you didn’t fuck. Even after you got married, and all your friends had warned you your sex life would change and frequency would lessen, you and Joel still managed to keep a healthy schedule in the bedroom. Things did slow down a bit when Sarah was born. Caring for a newborn is exhausting, and you and Joel could barely keep your eyes open. As Sarah got older, things in the bedroom began to pick up again. Tommy would come over and watch Sarah so you and Joel could have regular date nights to keep the romance alive. At the end of the night, you’d go home and fuck like you used to. It helped keep the passion alive amid the stress of your jobs, maintaining the household, and getting Sarah to and from school, soccer practices, and playdates. This has been the longest dry spell you’ve experienced in your relationship with Joel, hopeful it is temporary. 

After your work project finally wraps up and Joel’s current job has slowed while he waits for permits, you arrange a sleepover for Sarah at her friend’s house tonight. She’s finally at the age where she feels comfortable with overnights where you and Joel aren’t just down the hall. You log off work early, having already put in close to sixty hours for the week, and head to the mall. You want to find something to knock Joel’s socks off and re-energize you both. After an hour of perusing your favorite lingerie store racks, you find a few sets to try on. You fumble around in the fitting room, trying on your selections until you find a winner. Joel won’t know what hit him—an emerald green negligee with lace cups and trim, fly-away opening, and matching thong panties. You feel a tingle of excitement imagining his reaction. 

You’ve already dropped Sarah off at her friend’s house, and the dinner table is set by the time Joel gets home. Joel walks into the smell of roasted chicken, mashed potatoes, and green beans. It’s one of his favorite meals that you make. He finds you standing over the stove, putting the finishing touches on dinner. He comes over to greet you, wraps his arms around you from behind, and leaves a kiss on the sensitive area where your shoulder and neck meet. You sway in his arms, relishing in his embrace, inhaling his scent of sweat and sawdust—the smell of a man who works hard to provide for his family. 

“I’ve missed you, darlin’. How was your day?”

“Pretty good. I’m glad you’re home.”

“Me too. Do I have time for a quick shower before dinner?” 

“Yup, the chicken still has to sit before I cut into it.” He pulls away from you and places a playful swat on your ass before he heads upstairs. 

Joel hops in the shower, looking forward to a quiet, relaxed evening with you. It’s been so long since you’ve had an opportunity to be alone together. He hopes tonight he’ll be able to rekindle the passion you both have craved from each other these past months; he’s missed being intimate with you. It’s just been hard to find time to connect with how busy you’ve both been lately. He’s thankful there’s a lull at his current job site, which has relieved some of his stress. While he’s in the shower, he debates whether he should fuck his fist so he can last longer with you. Eventually, he decides against it because there’s not enough time, and he wants to ensure he has enough stamina for you. When he steps out of the shower, he changes into a pair of grey sweatpants and a white t-shirt and heads downstairs for dinner.

You head upstairs while Joel finishes cleaning up the kitchen after dinner. When you hear the kitchen faucet shut off, you scramble to finish getting dressed for Joel. A few minutes later, he appears in the doorway of your shared bedroom, mouth agape. He’s at a loss for words; you are a vision. His eyes travel your body to find you wearing his favorite green plaid flannel, with your legs bare. It also happens to be your favorite green plaid flannel. He always looks incredibly handsome in it. The shirt hugs him in all the right places, stretching across his broad shoulders and tapering at his slim waist. Any time he wears it, all you want to do is take it off. Joel imagines he probably looks like The Mask when he sees Tina for the first time—eyes bulging out, jaw dropped, and tongue rolled out in front of him. He lifts his jaw off the floor and finally remembers how to speak; he exhales, “I think that looks better on you than it does me.”

“Hmmm. It’s possible.” You slowly unbutton the shirt as you saunter towards Joel. “But, I think it may look better off of me.” You let the flannel fall to the floor.

Joel is going to lose his mind. He’s the luckiest guy in the world. He has an incredible life—an intelligent, generous, and beautiful wife who gave him a caring, witty, and beautiful daughter. His time with you has been the best years of his life. The wisest decision he made was asking you to be his wife. And now, you’re standing in front of him in this green silk number that has caused all the blood to rush to his cock. His cock, which is now stretching the fabric of his sweatpants with a pronounced bulge. You take notice and grin, pleased at his reaction. “So, I guess this was a good pick?” 

He steps closer, now within arms reach. Trailing his fingers down the smooth fabric, he responds, “Baby, it’s perfect. You’re perfect.” He pulls you in for a searing kiss. “I’ve missed you so much. I’ve missed us.”

You melt into his arms and feel his cock press against you, and arousal pools in your silk panties. Joel’s hands trail down the back of your body slowly. He teases at the lace trim before sliding his hands under your negligee to rest on the soft, round globes of your ass. His calloused hands explore your supple skin, and he lets out a grunt as he grabs hold and thrusts his stiff cock into your center. The contact causes him to suck air in between his teeth with a hiss. It’s been too long since he's had you this way, and he’s not sure how long he’ll last. Your kissing becomes a mix of frantic tongues and wet lips devouring each other. The intensity at which he takes over is overwhelming. You love it when he gets this way like he could eat you alive; he wants you so badly. 

“You feel so soft, baby.” He pants between kisses. “Mmmm, I need you.”

“I know, Joel. I need you too…so bad.” 

It’s a frenzy of hands groping at each other. Neither of you can hold back. He begins to drag the hem of your negligee up and prompts you to lift your arms as he pulls it over your breasts, which tumble out of the fabric. He watches them bounce with rapt attention, practically drooling. They aren’t as perky as when you and Joel first met, but he’s always been obsessed with them. With you standing in front of him, bare except your thong, he takes one of your breasts in his mouth, the other held in a firm grip as he massages and lathes at them. You moan in pleasure as he takes his time covering every inch, leaving a trail of licks and soft bites across your chest.

Joel moves up your sternum, trailing over your collarbone and neck, nipping at your jaw, locking your lips with his once he reaches his destination. The noises emitting from Joel’s are animalistic. He needs to consume you in every way possible. He begins to grind into you, pressing his cock into you. You let out a needy moan as his hips propel forward into your soaked panties. Joel’s eyes widen at the last press of his hips into you, and he realizes he’s about to come. Oh fuck. No, no, nononono. This can’t be happening. Not tonight. He was so in the moment that he couldn’t catch the signs. Maybe he should’ve jerked off in the shower. Shit. Joel’s mind begins to run through his playbook of thoughts he uses when he wants to stave off an impending orgasm. The latest delivery of lumber, the Longhorns’ upcoming season, and the leaking faucet in the half bath that he wants to fix this weekend. But it’s too late. He grunts and moans, his thick fingers gripping your hip for balance as he explodes into his pants and lets out an exasperated sigh. It takes you a moment to realize what happened as you watch a wet spot bloom on the front of his pants. He hasn’t cum in his pants since he was a teenager. 

“That hasn’t happened to me since high school,” he admits, embarrassed. 

You lift Joel’s head, your hands tenderly holding the sides of his face, and look into his eyes. “Baby, this is probably the best compliment ever! I may have trouble getting through the doorway with how big my head is right now.” you chuckle. 

He lets out a short laugh, and a small smile forms across his handsome face. Gripping your upper arm, he leads you to walk backward until your legs hit the bed. “Well, my recovery time isn’t what it used to be.” He pushes you gently until you collapse onto the bed, ogling your breasts as they bounce in response. “I hope you’re ready to come for me a few times before he’s ready to go again.” 

“I think I can manage that.” You giggle as his broad body hovers over you, and he leaves a path of wet kisses down the plane of your chest, in between your breasts, and over the soft rolls of your stomach. As he approaches your center, he shimmies your panties over your hips and down your legs, exposing your wet cunt to the cool air of the bedroom. Joel moans, “There she is. God, I’ve missed her.”

He dropped to his knees in front of the bed, his broad shoulders spread your legs apart, giving him a perfect view of the arousal coating your folds. His fingers travel up your thick thighs, inching closer to your core. You’re writhing in anticipation of his touch where you need him most. He takes his time, teasing you until you almost break. Sensing your need, he gives in and runs his finger over your clit and down your seam. He looks up at you with a devilish grin before he dives in. His tongue glides through your folds, lapping up your arousal. Your back arches, shoving your pussy in his face when he reaches your clit. He circles his tongue over the hardened nub, wraps his lips around it, and begins to suck and flick his tongue, sending shockwaves up your body, causing a moan to tumble from your mouth. He smirks without letting his lips leave you, pleased with your response.

You’ve been together long enough that Joel knows precisely what you need and where you need it to make you see stars. His forearms grip around your thighs to hold you in place, not letting you pull away from his tongue ravishing your clit. He’s devouring you like a man starved. Because it’s true, he has been starved. The last six months have been brutal, not being able to taste your sweet tang. He lets out a feral groan as he continues to eat at you. He knows you’re close and groans into your pussy. The vibration reverberating through your body is enough to send you over the edge. Your thighs shake, a harmony of moans and curse words barreling from your lips while you cum all over his patchy beard. He laps up your slick while he gazes at your blissed-out face. Joel ascends the bed and leans in to kiss you, and with a devilish grin, he teases, “That’s one!” 

You laugh, a broad smile across your face as Joel admires you, so much love and lust in his eyes. “So, big guy, what’s in store for number two?”

With a mischievous look, his eyes never leave yours as his hand travels down your body. His fingers dance over your soft stomach until they reach your entrance. He breaches your wet folds with two fingers, knowing you’re more than ready to receive them after you just came on his tongue. They slide in easily as his thumb meets your clit. He’s slow with his teasing because you’re still a little sensitive. He thrusts in and out, bumping into that spongy spot that sends electric volts through your body. It doesn’t take him long to build you back up to another orgasm. He feels you clench around his fingers and continues his pace until you erupt with a cry, your orgasm gushing out of you, soaking his fingers. Joel pulls his fingers up to his mouth to clean up your juices and then leans forward with a peck on your nose, “That’s two!”

He feels his cock begin to stiffen. He’ll be ready to go soon; he just needs you to come again for him. He pulls out a vibrator from the nightstand. You look at him incredulously, unsure if you have another one in you, feeling so overstimulated already. Joel flicks the purple toy on and smiles as it hums. He begins on the lowest speed, dragging the tip up and down your pussy lips. You feel yourself getting wet again with his teasing. He increases the speed and watches as you thrust your hips up, your body’s natural response to the change. It’s almost too much, but you feel your orgasm drawing closer and grip his forearm as he drags the tip of the vibrator through your folds until pressing it up against your clit, moving to the highest speed. Your eyes roll back as your body flails with your release. Joel watches as you come down from your high. He shifts his eyes to his pants and returns to yours with a smile. His cock is rock hard now. “I guess the third time’s the charm!”

You lift from the bed and eagerly grab at the waistband to pull them down over his hips. His dick springs out, and you lick your lips. He would love nothing more than to watch his cock slide through your luscious lips, but he’s not risking it. He knows he won’t last long in your wet mouth, and he wants to come inside you. Joel lifts your chin, and you look at him with doe eyes, “He needs to get inside your pussy, baby.”

With unbridled enthusiasm, you lay back on the bed as Joel pulls off his pants completely, and he crawls up your body. Holding your gaze, he lines up and begins to feed his cock into you. You are pressed so close together, and with him now inside you, it's as if you two have become one person. He thrusts into you, slowly at first, and gradually increases his speed. He doesn’t feel deep enough and has to give you all of him, so he lifts and moves your legs to rest your calves on his left shoulder, his cock never leaving the clutch of your pussy. With your thighs now pressed together to make your pussy feel even tighter, he grabs onto your hips, thrusting in earnest. His pelvis slapping into your ass with each drive of his cock inside you. Feeling his orgasm build, he pushes his body forward, folding you over and driving even deeper. When he hits the spot, it sends you into a frenzy, and you cum, wailing his name. Joel’s jaw tenses as he grunts and follows after you, flooding your walls with his seed.  

As you both catch your breath, trying to recover from the immense euphoria, Joel looks down at you and sees tears fall from your eyes. He kisses them away as they slide down your temple. When he leans back, he thumbs at a new tear that’s formed and wipes it away before it has a chance to fall. “You ok, hon?” he asks, concerned.

“Oh, yes, Joel. I’m fantastic. I’m just so fucking happy.”

Your favorite Joel smile appears—the one that is so full and wide it makes his eyes disappear and wrinkle at the corners. It feels like your heart will burst from your chest. He slams into you with another toe-curling kiss. When he finally pulls away from your lips, he looks into your eyes, “I love you so fucking much.” 

“I love you, too, Joel.” 

He pulls his softening cock out of you with a hiss, and you whimper at the loss of him. He keeps your legs up so he can watch as his cum drips out of your swollen lips. Satisfied with his work, he shifts your body to the side and sidles up behind you, wrapping his arms around you. He hums while he peppers soft kisses over your shoulder, and you let out a sated sigh. You’ll worry about cleaning up later. You don’t imagine you’ll have difficulty convincing him to hop in the shower with you. But for now, you want to stay in the embrace of your strong, handsome, and loving husband for as long as possible.

Thank you so much for reading! I'd love to know what you think. Reblogs and comments are greatly appreciated. 🫶🏻

[aokoaoi]

so ive been thinking abt smth lately and i just gotta request it yk? could you do like hcs where reader loves to braid neteyams hair and put little beads in with it as well, and jake is just literally shipping them soo hard 😭

༄ pairings : neteyam x fem!reader.

༄ warnings : none:P

༄ authors note : i loved this request sm<3, it was so fun writing it, and simple as well. ty for requesting !

— one thing neteyam definitely loves about you is your ways of showing affection. and how you constantly want to braid his hair for him.

— he seriously can't resist whenever you just come up to him, either strut to his direction, or behind him and tap his shoulders, and you go; "can I braid your hair? Please?"

— he wouldn't dare resist.

— first time you did this, he was overly confused and flustered.

— you're so sweet when you braid his hair; you always ask if you're accidentally pulling his hair too hard, or if he was feeling uncomfortable or tired.

— you're also surprisingly fast when you do braids. But he notices that often times, you slow down your pace just so you both can have an excuse to talk to eachother longer.

— now, you're basically his hairstylist.

— at random times, when you're braiding his hair and he start randomly flirting and telling jokes, whether it'd be bad ones or good ones, you always pull on his hair as a way to make him stop.

"Ow!"

"I told you to stop."

"You didn't have to pull on my hair:("

— you immediately apologized after those. He knows he can guilt-trip you with his cute pouts. Yes, he knows your weaknesses>:).

— if you have lots of time or is just simply feeling playful and childish, you put flowers or beads in his hair even if he doesn't want it.

— he never tells you no when you put the small flowers in his hair though, he only tells you not to when they're gonna go to another supply raid. He can't bare to get teased by his brother again.

— when his brother teased him though, his father surprisingly stood up for him.

— it was hilarious when Lo'ak looked at their father with a :o face.. it was almost as if he was betrayed💀..

— one thing about you too, is that you put flowers behind your ear to finish up your looks. So yes, flowers are your signature style.

— he also noticed that the flowers you use on his hair matched the ones you used, so it does fluster him everytime he realized.

— he wasn't the only one who noticed, though.

— his mother also did when she complimented your hair.

"I love that flower in your hair, (name)."

"Thank you, Mrs!"

"Wait, Neteyam has those in his hair."

"Oh yeah, I styled his hair, therefore I put them there:D"

— Neytiri immediately snitched to Jake, giving him more fuel to make his som just propose his love for you already.

— Neteyam turned his father's statements down as if it were the end of the world. His face was hot, and it wasn't helping that his mother was siding with his father.

"Just tell her already."

"I don't know what you're talking about."

"Ma child, I know what love is when I see it."

"She's just being nice, mom!"

"Nice my ass."

"Stop it:("

— Jake and Neytiri won't stop ganging up on him.

— the last thing he wants know is for his other siblings to know.

— but at least his parents loved you:D

[pshbites]

LOVE ON AiR 2. YAP CENTRAL EP.135: alpha male podcasts?!

WARNiNGS » pop culture references, profanity, errrm cant rlly think of anything else

3.6k words (IMSORRY), also it may be a bit confusing but its kind of written like an audio transcript! not all written parts will be like this only the podcast episodes! also this is NOT proofread so pls excuse any typos or grammar mistakes 😞😞

episode desc -  enjoy your stay today in yap central :D ! in todays episode we started off with a deep question about love and relationships and gave our inputs on that. after allll those deep talks we did a good ole blind ranking forms of ‘first dates’. following that up we mention alpha male podcasts and why they should be indefinitely wiped off the face of the earth. to wrap things up we discuss proper aux etiquette *COUGH* kat *COOUGHHH*. hope you had fun with us today and come back to visit yap central! 

*the set up is a big living room, there’s two couches, mics propped up. the room has a very calming aura, there’s fairy lights and blankets on the couches. as well as plushies and throw pillows. on the couch to the left, kat, riki, and you are seated, adjusting your seating positions to be comfortable. on the couch to the right, jungwon, giselle, and sunoo are seated. jungwon sits back down after standing and gets comfortable*

jungwon: okay the camera is on now 

sunoo: kat i can’t take your costume seriously 

*all laugh in unison, riki is pointing at her, laughing and even after everyone is done he still can’t stop.* 

yn: for audio listeners we’re dressed as mario kart characters and kat is.. 

kat: YOSHI *in yoshi voice* 

riki: *still laughing* it’s the tail man 

giselle: this might be the best theme we’ve had so far 

sunoo: no no the one where we switched clothes was funny 

*girls laugh at the memory, jungwon groans and rolls his eyes* 

jungwon: okay no the girls chose bad clothes on purpose that day 

riki: i think we were set up 

yn: i lost a beloved crop top that day 

jungwon: it was way too tight around my arms! 

giselle: that’s surprising considering you have noodle arms 

riki: false *makes buzzer sound with mouth* he actually has been going to the gym more often 

kat: what improvement won *claps* 

sunoo: oh my god did i tell you guys about the comments on my skin care video with jungwon 

yn: no? the one where you opened the PR package right?

kat: wait can you give me some of those? 

giselle: yeah same 

sunoo: of course, thank you dr jart by the way for the package! *he looks to the camera, giving a peace sign* 

jungwon: what the hell were the comments?

sunoo: no yeah basically some of them were like oh how cute, or just about the skincare then the others were saying me and jungwon were a cute couple. 

*riki moves the mic away to laugh at sunoo, you and jungwon gasp.* 

kat: honestly i was expecting ship edits of me and yn 

yn: SAME! 

giselle: that’s so cute you guys are official!

*riki continues to laugh while jungwon glares at giselle, then looks to the camera* 

jungwon: me and sunoo aren’t dating hate to break it to you all

sunoo: you aren’t even my type calm down 

riki: rejected in front of the whole world how do you feel jungwon? 

jungwon: anyways beep- 

giselle: wait before we sign in can we get a water break 

yn: yeah i have to go to the bathroom

jungwon: i literally told you guys to go before 

yn: would you want me to piss on your carpet 

giselle: how would twitter feel knowing you let your editor go thirsty

jungwon: *sighs* go hurry up 

*you and giselle walk out of the room, talking but mics cannot pick it up* 

kat: did you guys see the whole brooke schofield and clinton kane thing? 

sunoo: oh my god yeah.. that shit is crazy 

riki: what happened 

sunoo & kat: basically- oh no you go first 

jungwon: one of you say it 

*kat looks to sunoo, nodding for him to speak* 

sunoo: basically brooke, the co host on cancelled, dated this singer named clinton kane and he full blown LIED about every aspect of their relationship like he said his whole family died but they didn’t and he faked having an australian accent. 

riki: rip you can’t make your mom jokes

jungwon: *laughs* no but there’s no way 

kat: no yeah and she made like a tiktok series kind of exposing him and they’re just going back to back. 

riki: what does this dude look like 

sunoo: *snorts* look him up on tiktok. clinton kane 

*both riki and jungwon get out their phones, typing away. the two of them look at their phones then each other. jungwon and riki start laughing* 

kat: i know! like how did she date him *laughs* 

jungwon: brooke dated HIM? 

sunoo: YES! that’s what i’m saying 

jungwon: look at his teeth he probably has gingivitis 

kat: ugh his breath probably stinks all the time 

*you and giselle come back into the room, confused at the conversation at hand and taking your seats. riki stares at his phone confused then looks to everyone else* 

riki: wait he’s not a ginger 

yn: what? 

riki: his hair is brown idiot 

jungwon: wait what are you talking about 

sunoo: riki are you on the right account stupid 

riki: i literally am. you said he has gingivitis, he’s literally not ginger 

*giselle gasps and starts laughing, causing the others to laugh. riki laughs nervously* 

riki: what

giselle: gingivitis means the tar on your teeth, not being a ginger 

sunoo: oh my god *wiping his tears away, still laughing* 

*riki groans, making everyone laugh, once collected jungwon clears his throat, sitting up* 

yn: thank god we came back to that 

giselle: i know

riki: okay guys that’s enough it’s not that funny

sunoo: oh it is. 

jungwon: alright, can we sign in now? 

*jungwon looks to everyone and they nod, each getting comfortable in their spot* 

jungwon: beep beep! you’ve arrived in yap central im your co host for today, mario. 

riki: and i am your second host, luigi

jungwon: starting from the far left we have 

kat: yoshi *in yoshi voice, waving to the camera* 

yn: princess daisy! *you show your crown, smiling.* 

giselle: princess peach! *she gives the camera a peace sign.* 

sunoo: and i’m toad *he giggles at his hat, the top of the toad.*

yn: i think out of everyone’s i love kats costume 

*kat laughs, pulling her yoshi onesie hood over her head. making the others laugh and smile at her.* 

jungwon: she’s so lucky she’s in a onesie me and riki have these stupid ass gloves 

riki: i don’t know man it’s kinda sick 

sunoo: *taking a sip of his water* is it not uncomfortable 

giselle: it’s giving mickey mouse 

riki: it’s giving your mom 

sunoo: guys riki discovered your mom jokes today 

kat: well your mom has ligma 

sunoo: the fuck is ligma 

yn & kat: LIGMA BALLS!!!! 

*everyone bursts out laughing at the immature joke. sunoo does not look amused yet still laughs along*

jungwon: it’s the way i saw it coming too 

riki: i saw your mom coming 

yn: pause?? 

sunoo: oh that’s not 

giselle: boyfriend! i’m nervous! 

*you, kat and giselle all giggle at her little reference* 

riki: wait no- 

jungwon: dude my mom watches this 

riki: i’m sorry miss yang i didn’t mean it 

jungwon: SHES MARRIED. 

riki: okay then what do i call a married woman?!? 

kat: mrs, not ms. 

riki: see was that so hard. *riki looks to the camera, interview style.* i’m sorry mrs yang i promise i will never say anything like that again 

jungwon: yeah she doesn’t watch the pod man, but thanks for apologizing to all the mrs yangs out there! 

*you and kat hold back your laughs as you look at riki. riki then rolls his eyes and jungwon earning a smile from him and opens his phone to the questions he has pulled up.* 

riki: everyone ready for the first question?

*they all nod, shifting in their seats a little to get adjusted. you sip from your water, giving your attention to riki and making sure the mic doesn’t pick it up.* 

riki: it’s kinda deep, is it easier to love or be loved. 

giselle: *gasps* that’s good one 

jungwon: it came from the patreon 

riki: since i asked the question let’s start on the other side, sunoo. 

sunoo: i think being loved has like a feeling you can’t  replace you know. 

yn: i agree, it’s like everything comes like full circle when you’re being loved by someone. it’s a really good feeling. 

sunoo: i do think though, to give love and to be loved has like its cons too. say if you were in a one sided relationship and you were giving love to someone who wouldn’t want it back, it hurts a lot. 

jungwon: it’s just draining on the person overall. 

kat: but i feel like if you were on the other side of that isn’t it equally as bad? you know if you were being loved by someone who you didn’t love back it’s just another issue because you feel like you owe them your love 

giselle: i agree with you, kat i do but i think it’s so much more tolling on the person giving love because it’s like you’re giving a part of yourself to someone else to cherish and hold. 

sunoo: wow that was poetic 

giselle: i know right? 

kat: yeah i get what you mean

giselle: giving your love is just so much deeper. sure to be loved is such a great feeling but giving your love isn’t just surface level, it’s like you actually love that person so much, and it’s so passionate too. 

riki: but that can be said for the other perspective too

giselle: you’re right 

yn: i honestly think being loved is something everyone gets to experience once in their lifetime, it’s not only limited to intimate relationships 

jungwon: ahh you have a point 

yn: you get to be loved by your parents, friends, anyone really who cares about you. it’s a good feeling and i think that almost everyone should have that kind of feeling in their lives. 

sunoo: what would you describe it as? 

yn: i think it’s different for every relationship. like for example being loved by my family is the thing that nothing can replace, it’s like a warm hug after a long storm. it’s familiar and it’s a feeling that i just think i would give the world to have all the time. 

riki: im the same way, even though i don’t live near my family anymore i miss them like crazy all the time. like my moms hugs. 

sunoo: ughhhh my moms hugs, im gonna drive by and hug her after this 

kat: are you gonna open the door and just give her a big fat hug and leave 

sunoo: you make me sound like a situationship who fucks you then leaves 

giselle: not our fault you worded it like that 

jungwon: i agree with you though yn. i do think that being loved just offers so much more than just intimate relationships. 

riki: i do too. but i see giselles point too. why did i have to pick the best question ever. *riki groans but smiles in the process, making kat slap his arm.* 

sunoo: you just wanted an ego boost. 

niki: perhaps. 

jungwon: i think that it’s a tie, both of them have their pros and cons 

kat: that’s a good way to end it 

sunoo: didn’t know it was a deep podcast today 

riki: sorry *laughs nervously* 

yn: no it’s okay i liked the question *you smile to riki, rubbing his shoulder* 

giselle: yeah same 

jungwon: well then you guys are gonna like this next segment. 

kat: wait let me guess would you rather?

jungwon: no

kat: scenarios?

jungwon: no kat-

kat: opinions on the [BLEEP]?!

*the group look to each other, then burst out laughing.*

giselle: fuck i’m gonna have to edit that out 

kat: what?

sunoo: we cant talk about the [BLEEP] thing remember. 

yn: yeah or else it’ll be our neck. according to [BLEEP] 

jungwon: guys stop bringing it up now we have to bleep all of that 

kat: sorry.. *she smiles nervously at jungwon and giselle and they both wave her off*

jungwon: what i was trying to say is that our next segment is blind ranking

sunoo: oh my god i love these

yn: same 

jungwon: topic is first dates 

riki: okay well i can’t participate i’ve never been on an actual date 

*sunoo moves his mic away to laugh at riki, riki stares at him to shut him up* 

jungwon: yeah that’s why i chose it for our episode dumbass. anyways there’s five of them so here’s the first one. a music festival  

kat: oh my god 3 duh 

yn: ehhhhh 5? 

kat: *gasp* what 

giselle: yeah im with yn 

sunoo: yeah 5 

kat: why that’s so fun 

yn: it’s too sweaty like i had to be super comfortable to even go to head in the clouds with riki and won

giselle: i feel like that’s cool to do if you’re already dating but first date? i don’t think so 

jungwon: majority rules sorry kat 

kat: yall are fake 

riki: okay next one is a classic, the movies 

sunoo: honestly 4 

giselle: maybe 3 i don’t know it’s very like highschool

yn: yeah i see what you mean. i think it’s just weird because what if you’re watching a popular movie and neither of you really like it. also you can’t really talk to get to know the person 

jungwon: personally this is a 5 for me 

kat: it’s so like.. middle school 

riki: doing that damn arm stretch. 

*everyone laughs at riki’s joke as he fake yawns to stretch his arms and put it around kat, making her laugh even harder.* 

jungwon: i was abusing that card in highschool 

yn: it’s so corny eww *laughs* 

kat: no it’s kinda smooth if someone can pull it off 

sunoo: i remember i did the counting shoulder thing in middle school 

yn: oh my god i remember that 

riki: i never heard of that one 

kat: like 1, 2 *she counts her own shoulders* and 3 *she puts her arm behind riki, him laughing as she did it* 

giselle: that’s a good one 

jungwon: so movie 4?

kat: yep movie 4. 

yn: this is so fun

jungwon: the next one is go karting 

sunoo: OOOOO

yn: might put this as a 1 

kat: okay but what if they choose a really really good one for the last one 

yn: ugh you’re right 

sunoo: im saying 2 

giselle: lowkey 3 

yn: noooo its so fun. like its playful and it’s not too much talking where it awkward. and then after that you can grab food and talk 

riki: that honestly sounds perfect 

kat: okay you’re convincing me 

sunoo: let’s stick with two because i know they’re gonna pick a good one 

giselle: okay yeah 2 

riki: next one is eating. like going out to eat 

yn: 3 it’s a safe choice 

giselle: yeah it’s safe 

sunoo: oh my god what’s the last one i’m excited 

jungwon: sitting at your number 1 spot is a date in the park 

kat: oh..

*you and sunoo side eye one another, and start laughing* 

riki: you guys fumbled 

giselle: ugh we should’ve put go kart at 1 

jungwon: i would’ve put go kart at 1 too

yn: okay park isn’t that bad 

sunoo: no it’s bad imagine all the bugs. and there isn’t a single cute park where we live 

kat: that’s definitely 5 

giselle: yeah i agree 

yn: what time are we at won? 

jungwon: about an hour. you guys ready for a break 

riki: yep, i’m gonna go grab water 

kat: yeah i have to use the bathroom

*riki and kat get up, moving their mics. they both walk out of the room. the rest of the group continues to scroll on their phones, checking notifications. giselle laughs and sets her phone down* 

giselle: did you guys see the top albums of all time? from apple music. 

jungwon: *snorts* yeah, yn what’d you think about the list 

yn: oh i loved it, i think there was too much classic rock on there but my girl lauryn hill sitting pretty at number 1 

sunoo: i love that album, like it’s so good 

jungwon: frank ocean was top 5 i think we’re getting an album 

*giselle laughs, shaking her head* 

giselle: i fear we won’t be getting one for a while. 

yn: no but imagine not knowing who lauryn hill is? 

*sunoo and jungwon side eye each other but stay quiet to let yn go on* 

yn: you must have some shit music taste if you don’t know lauryn hill is all i have to say 

sunoo: must be an alpha male 

*giselle, you and sunoo laugh. jungwon looks at sunoo, holding back a laugh* 

jungwon: cmon we weren’t gonna talk about it 

yn: speaking of alpha males let’s talk about alpha male podcasts. have we ever covered that? 

giselle: don’t think we have 

sunoo: it has to be rage bait 

jungwon: well no have you seen andrew tate, he was like so serious about it. 

yn: i think alpha male podcast are so stupid. like you must be so sensitive about your masculinity if you have to run a podcast all about it. 

*riki and kat enter the room, taking a seat* 

kat: what are we talking about? 

jungwon: lauryn hill and now alpha male podcasts

riki: i fucking love lauryn hill 

kat: alpha male podcast should be wiped off the face of the earth

giselle: and they invite like instagram models on there and like flame them for no reason 

jungwon: they are like the bane of this existence 

sunoo: honestly is it just me or like recently has there been an uprise in podcasts 

giselle: no i get what you mean 

yn: i think when all those like old youtubers started doing podcasts they became popular again. 

riki: everyone and their mom has podcast 

kat: dude we have a podcast 

riki: yeah.. we’re everyone and their mom keep up 

*you laugh next to him, shaking your head* 

jungwon: you guys ready for the last question 

giselle: mhm 

jungwon: so as surprising as it is we’ve never talked about aux etiquette on this podcast. what do you guys think proper aux etiquette is? 

giselle: i think proper aux etiquette is playing music that everyone listens to 

jungwon: yeah.. *jungwon glares at kat, making you and riki laugh. kat furrows her brows in confusion*

kat: um hello im an amazing dj 

sunoo: you’re in fact not 

yn: yeah babe 

kat: *scoffs* what! wait do you guys seriously not like my music? 

riki: well no it’s just whenever you’re on aux- 

jungwon: which is all the fucking time 

*you and sunoo laugh* 

riki: like i was saying whenever you’re on aux, you always try and get us on to the music you listen to and it’s just shitty house music like *starts imitating one of the songs* 

kat: you guys don’t appreciate taste 

jungwon: you mean noise? yeah we don’t 

*kat laughs* 

sunoo: hot take i really don’t want music when im hanging out with my friends 

yn: your worst take yet 

sunoo: okay what the fuck 

riki: i’m sorry but pitch silence? fuck i’d go crazy in a car with kat and yn 

yn: rude 

riki: you two talk soooo much 

kat: not our fault you’re a nonchalant emo 

jungwon: *laughing* fuck 

giselle: i agree with sunoo to an extent like it depends on what we’re doing. if we were going to a club or something i’d want to get hyped up but on the way back i would want to debrief 

sunoo: yeah i agree with that

riki: let’s rank us in terms of aux 

jungwon: kat is dead last 

kat: your music taste isn’t amazing i don’t know why you’re talking 

jungwon: least i can admit it 

sunoo: the girls are fighting.. 

yn: i think it goes kat in last, then sunoo 

sunoo: wait what 

yn: your music taste isn’t like versatile. no hate it’s just not great on aux 

sunoo: yeah well yours is shit too 

yn: don’t care *you stick your tongue out at him making him stick it out back, the two of you giggle*

giselle: i think first place is between riki and yn 

yn: my brother just another me 

*you and riki fist bump each other, giggling* 

jungwon: it’s gonna go to their big fat egos 

riki: frank ocean is never gonna release an album ever again 

jungwon: take that back 

riki: your mom 

kat: as much as i hate to say it jungwon might be second. it’s tied between you and giselle 

sunoo: so we agree that kat should never get aux 

giselle: she’s always fucking arguing for it too 

*the group laughs* 

yn: like damn if you’re gonna fight for aux atleast put on music we all like 

kat: ugh fine i will next time 

riki: next time im getting aux 

jungwon: we’re gonna hear emo music the whole ride 

riki: to be emo is to be free 

giselle: rikilations

sunoo: what time are we at? 

jungwon: an hour thirty ish. should we end it? 

kat: i mean did you guys have any other questions 

riki: nah i didnt, did you? *he looks to jungwon* 

jungwon: nope 

giselle: okay sign us out then 

riki: thank you for staying with us today at yap central we hope you enjoyed your stay. 

jungwon: remember to subscribe, like, comment, and share this video. check out our bio for resources and sign up for patreon. peace! 

previous masterlist next

AUTHORS NOTE » i had SOO much fun writing this, like it felt like i was actually sitting there with them. the bleeps aren't too hard to guess bc its pretty obvious. i wanted to include them so it felt more real and i hope this wasnt TOO confusing

TAGLiST » @lqfiles @strawberrysavi @blockbusterhee @onlyhyunjin @purennn @jungkit @flwoie @imheretoread @firstclassjaylee @pinkishyng @luvgiselle @kang-ulzzang @cherryxbxmb @jkslvsnella @urslytherin @somerandomf1fan @i03jae @kittykangz @s0urcherry @istglevi-gotmesimping

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[not-goldy]

Do you think Jikook's bond (whatever it is) is a goldmine to HYBE and they are trying to profit off it?

Thanks for such an intelligent question, having had one such mentally stimulating ask in a while.

Is Hybe overtly exploiting the chemistry that BTS has and that each pair has within the band, absolutely. I mean that bit should be so easy to wrap your head around.

Romance, bromance is one of the top selling genres of all time. The idea of BTS having a super strong fated bond between them is so commercially viable literal movies and songs have been written about them. 7 dates, bullet proof, and their recent Kdrama series etc to be exact.

And ships sell. I've said this since day one. The commercial viability of ships is just an offshoot of the commercial viability of bands as discussed above.

So yes, within that context, Hybe definitely would gravitate towards the two members with the most chemistry, who also happen to be two of the most liked members of the group, two of the most popular members and the most influential members of the group.

You don't go to war with your weakest soldiers.

Jikook is a very strong ship. We all know that.

They've had the most running in the group with some of the ships rising and falling over the years in terms of chemistry and popularity.

There's a lot to do with a pair like that. Reality shows, travel shows, documentaries, memoirs, tell all, cooking shows.

I watch a lot of reality TV and it's not hard to see how Jikook would fit right into that realm.

If BTS was love Island 🏝 Jikook would get their own spinoff after the season ended.

Fans love them, they get the most votes, the camera adores them and producers have so much they wanna do with them.

Am I making sense???

Going off with the Love Island analogy, just because Jikook are fan favorite, and the crew likes to follow them every where with a camera, and they are getting a spin off show of just the two of them don't necessarily mean their bond is fake that they are only existing for fan service or that the company is exploiting them.

There's just so much to do with them. They are fun entertaining adorable and a pleasure to work with.

So to answer your question I'll say yes and no.

Yes, they definitely a Goldmine for hybe in as far as content production goes.

No because they get to kill two birds with one stone. They can make money off of them, but also they create a safe space for Jikook to have that longevity to explore and nurture their relationship. They love being together. They love doing what they do. Hybe simply allows them to live their dreams and relationship much longer.

I've always said, if any queer pair in kpop were real you'd find them in a ship because ships would be their perfect cover for it. And we've seen jikook use this card very often to get out of trouble. Everything they do would be chalked down to fan service no matter how egregious they were. It can be invalidating and frustrating but In a way, it's also safe for them that way.

If I got paid to cozy up to my girlfriend, travel the world with her, eat as much as we can, hike, experience all and any culture- yall could call us anything you want I'm taking that offer🤣🤣🤣🤣

But we gotta give credit where credit is due because to me it's Jungkook that lay the foundation for all of this to be possible when he put of his first GCF with Jimin and later Jimin lay on top of him on a couch talking bout how they ought to do it again and how he would even model for him if filming is what he wanted to do.

I think they gave Hybe the idea of what it can do with them.

You can tell these things are things they both naturally want to do and have already done. During Run, they come up with a team name, they work well together, during rehearsals they stay behind and work on their routines tweaking it a bit, they come up with cooking shows to do, stay up all night doing nothing.

They are by themselves very creative and adventurous.

So like I said, I don't think this is hybe mining them but more so amplifying and giving them the production value to do what they already have been doing which they love, fans love and the company loves.

I'm sure if any other pair had this same organic pull towards eachother and wanted to be around eachother all the time too hybe would be just as curious and invested in them but as it turns out there isn't.

We are not stupid, we see them. And we see how some members act like they can't wait to get out of set when others keep it going even after they yell cut.

We see them all.

[theoryofthemultiverse]

Hoyo‘s Doctors as Dads🧸

Synopsis: Do they want children? How would they be as dads? What hobbies would they have with their children?

Characters: Baizhu, Dr.Ratio, Il Dottore

A.N: Oh yes!!! Beware though I made this pretty realistically what I thought their decisions would be based on a few presented factors. Also very sorry I didn’t post anything, I feel like my writing is getting worse :.)

C.w: Reader is implied to carry the baby, also Dr. Ratio‘s part is a lot longer than Baizhu‘s and Dottore‘s (sorry I can’t do all men justice equally ):

-🧸<🍼> 🧸-🧸<🍼> 🧸🧸<🍼> 🧸🧸<🍼> 🧸🧸<

Baizhu🐍

He definitely wouldn’t be opposed to the idea. He would love to raise a child with you and teach it all about the world and make it into a lovely human being.

So his parenting style would support that! He would want to be there for his child no matter if there are emotional troubles that it can’t cope with or experiences to be made in reality. He would in general be very patient with his child and have a good mixture of strictness with gentleness.

He also detest shouting at it, as well as scolding too harshly so he really tries to not do this to make sure he doesn’t damage the relationship with his child. Nonetheless, the child knows when his tone gets stern that it did something wrong and better listens to what its father has to tell them.

As for what he would do together with them, there are a lot of things. Surely he would like to teach the kid a little bit about medicine even if it ends up not wanting to do that for their profession. He thinks it’s good to have some basic medicinal knowledge. He would also take them for some walks and hikes in nature when going out for herbs.

Dr. Ratio🎓

Getting Children is admittedly not really on his radar. He is so focused on work that he tries his best to be there often enough for let alone you, so if you two were to get a child he would have a lot more time to invest into it and sacrifice work time to be here for you and the baby. Especially since he wouldn’t want you to be the only one to need to invest their time into it.

And while that might not be the end of the world, it would bother him to have his pretty good work-life balance smashed together by a little human. Since he is also pretty content with the relationship only being between the two of you.

Yet if you were to listen to his reasons and be able to make a few sacrifices on your side, he would maybe be willing to give you a child. In your pregnancy he would then be there for you to the best of his abilities and care for the little human inside you, yet you can see there is a bit of distance.

But that distance also gets less after the baby is born and has features of him and you. He would fall in love.

He then would be more of a stricter dad. He has read a lot about parenting in books prior yet still wouldn’t fuss to scold the child occasionally if it did something really wrong.

What he would do with the child largely depends on the child’s personality. If he notices the child likes learning and asks him questions about every kind of science then he would be over the moon. If the child turns out to be hating school and academics however.. be prepared to watch him try to cope with that.

If the child would be willing, he would indulge in every childlike imagination with them, explaining the physics of a flying ship, floating water in zero gravity, you name it. If the child is completely disinterested though. He will have a hard time to bond with it, since there is only an emotional component left which is very important and which he could fulfill just fine, but there is no shared passion between them then.

So all in all, he would probably be against getting a child. The chances of him and it not connecting are too big to him to want to try it out because even if you try it and it doesn’t work, he doesn’t want a child to need to suffer under it. He also simply isn’t interested in the major life changes that come with it and admits that he is not cut out to be a parent which is fine too isn’t it?

Il Dottore🧪

You want a child? He would give it to you, what’s the harm in it after all? Most that it would have in store for him is another human he could teach some things about lab work.

But other than concerning himself with it when it comes to work be prepared to raise it on your own. Dottore may be willing to give you a child and help you with giving birth and be there for all the pregnancy related things, but he would more do the minimum rather than the maximum.

But if you agree that you are okay with the minimum and occasional bonding moments he‘d have with the child then there you go!

Maybe he would also deploy one of his clones from time to time to entertain the baby (but please make sure it doesn’t end up in an experiment then :).

If you ever really have all hands full nonetheless and all the clones are with him in an experiment you will get the lucky chance to see Dottore strapped with your little one to the chest walking around the lab with the clones. Which surely is questionable but boy does it look kinda cute.

They all would probably get so distracted by the baby after some point tho that everything is about it and work is forgotten.

[chaoticbardlady99]

Nobody's Fool (Astarion x GN! Reader) Part 1

Synopsis: You approach Astarion at the Tiefling party and get rejected. Everyone else and Astarion knows he made a mistake, but you certainly don't.

Author Note: I LOVE Shadowheart- okay. Love her, but she is also my favorite hot girl rival in my fiction. No idea why. I just also love the idea of her being best friends with a Selunite by the end of her journey (or ship her hardcore with an Oathbreaker Paladin)

CW: Sad boi rejection hours, mentions of sex, mentions of Dead Dove.

Based off of a post by @golden-baby

(I also listened to Avril Lavigne’s Nobody’s Fool while writing this and it’s very good if you haven’t heard it)

(IDK Who this gif belongs too, but it is not mine)

You have always been the first person to throw yourself into a situation and help others- it was what had drawn you to being a Cleric of Selune in the first place. 

 You miss being a young cleric studying the life domain under the stars and the bright moon. You miss not feeling so terrified. 

 All this tadpole has brought you is anxiety and fear, you have a feeling it will be okay. You are here for a reason and you trust that Selune needs you to trust her. 

 Meeting Shadowheart had certainly confirmed that- she obviously was plummeting down the wrong path, but she has also flipped this thinking on you a few times. Only, you cannot understand following a Goddess as cruel as Shar. She has obviously brought serious damage to Shadowheart’s life and you are determined to support her- whether she gets away from Shar’s doctrine now or fifty years from now, you will be here to help her when the time comes.

 In spite of your differences, you actually go to the same spot and pray together- farther away from each other, but the sentiment is still there. Occasionally you drink together after a particularly weird or bad day. You find you both can talk about your religious beliefs and you are open to hers which in turn has begun to show her how to be open to your religious doctrine. It’s nice to have someone to talk about the bigger powers at play- even if that person opposes your Goddess so viciously. You don’t really care- you know followers of Shar are hurt people hurting people. They need love just as much as the next person. 

 Lae’zel has been a tougher nut to crack, but you have provided sympathy where you can and support her. You promised her that you would all head to the mountains and search for the Creché. If the cure is there- she will get it. That has made Lae’zel feel better a few times.

 Karlach just wants a good life and to talk about the joys of Life, Gale wants someone to talk to about magic and help finding magic items, and Wyll just wants to feel accepted and like he is still the mighty Blade of Frontiers.

 Then there is Astarion.

 You have been head over heels for the man since he knocked you to the ground and questioned you. You could probably stare at him forever if it wasn’t so Gods damn creepy. 

 You practically bend over backwards to help him- far more than you do for others, anyhow. He seems to like you and you have definitely thought about asking him to go on a date with you at some point. 

 But then you think about how not romantic having a tadpole in your head is and nix the idea. 

  You listen to him whenever he speaks to you, any books you find usually end up going to him. Gale is still pretty upset about the Necromancy of Thay. 

 Any new short swords, daggers, arrows, bows, crossbows, armor, potions, etc- you name it, you probably already gave it to him. You often think you may be far too obvious with your affections, but it’s the only thing you know kind of appeases him.

 Every decision you make he despises and makes a point of mocking you for. Karlach is often telling him to knock it off, but that usually just makes it worse so you just laugh it off even though it hurts. You just remind yourself that he lived as a slave for the last 200 years and you are the first to admit that your Goddess failed to save him. You don’t know why, but it is what it is. Maybe one day he will see that not all people are his ruthless master. 

You also let him drink from you every three or so days. If he is injured in battle- you are first to offer him another drink. 

 Astarion calls you, “Darling '' from time to time and you thought that might be something, but you also heard him call Karlach and Shadowheart that too. 

 You feel so conflicted when you go to bed- he seeks out Shadowheart and never you at bedtime. He spends all night talking to her about Gods only knows what. You are certain some of it is mocking you, but you try to remain optimistic. He wouldn’t do that- you have been nothing but kind to him. What could he even say?

 Tonight is the first night that he is by himself and not talking to Shadowheart. You can do it- just go up and ask him if he would like to take a walk with you. No big deal. 

 “Hi Astarion,” you say softly, “are you having fun?”

“No- no thanks to you, by the way.”

 Your smile falters slightly, but you rebound. 

“I’m sorry- I wasn’t trying to ruin your night.”

 Astarion rolls his eyes and flashes a smile that makes your breath catch. 

 “I suppose it couldn’t be helped, Darling,” he says with a dismissive wave, “you and all your do gooder nonsense was bound to get us here eventually.”

 You smile brightly- happy with the positive step forward. 

“How rude of me- I forgot to ask- how can I help you this evening?” 

  This is the big moment- you can do it! 

“I was-“ you clear your throat, take a deep breath and avoid his eyes, “I was wondering if you would want to go on a walk with me on the beach later?” 

 Astarion blinks a few times and you think you see the hint of a smile- it makes you feel slightly optimistic. 

 Until it turns into a snort and a laugh he can’t hold back.

“You are so naive,” your heart drops, “whatever gave you the impression that I would want to ‘go on a walk’ with you?” 

 You frown, a lump in your throat is beginning to form and you feel so embarrassed that you wouldn’t even know where to begin to explain yourself.

“I- you’re right. I’m sorry.”

“I am glad we could clear that up.”

“Me too,” you say with a forced smile, “good night.”

“You don’t have to-“

 You walk away- all the horror and heartbreak simply being far far too much to bear. How could you be so positively stupid? 

 Your mother always chastised you for this kind of thing- you give and give and give, hoping it will make people love you, but it never works. They will take everything from you and then some because they can. 

 You sit on an alcove overlooking the camp- far enough away that you hopefully won’t be spotted by anyone. You wish you hadn’t- you just barely catch a glimpse of Astarion dragging the all alluring and elusive Shadowheart away into the forest. 

 You are diminished to tears- your heart feels like it has splinters all over it and your stomach feels like it may twist before collapsing in on itself. 

 You are about to give up and leave, but the sound of approaching footsteps catches your attention. 

“It’s just me,” Wyll says with his hands up, a friendly smile on his face, “you seemed like you may need a friend.”

 You laugh and wipe your tears away, “and here I thought I was hiding it so well.”

 “You do, my friend,” Wyll says before putting a hand on your shoulder, “what troubles you?” 

 “You are going to think I’m stupid.”

 Wyll laughs lightheartedly, “I have seen and done my fair share of ‘stupid’.” 

 You inhale deeply and tell Wyll your story- from start to finish. You are a crying mess by the end of it- so much so that Wyll actually maneuvered you and began cradling you in his arms. 

 His heartbeat helps steady you- the connection to nature and the ground is helpful. It makes it all feel a bit better- you suppose.

 You eventually sit back down next to Wyll- your face is blotchy and red, tear stained and puffy. 

“I have noticed that you give Astarion all of you,” Wyll says with a frown, “spirit, body, heart, and mind.

“Maybe it is time to stop- set some boundaries for yourself. I am sorry that you did not get the answer you wanted, but at least now you know and that is a blessing. You can now look for someone who truly wants you and gives equally as much as they take.” 

 You nod. You had hoped to hear more of a, “he will come around” message, but you know this is the better, healthier message. You despise it, but it’s true.

 You and Wyll spend time talking about other things. You tell him how you hope to open your own clinic one day and help people who cannot afford it. Wyll tells you about the Sword Coast, his failings, and his own trauma. 

 He teaches you different constellations, the different flora in the area, and what the fishing season was like when the town was functioning and Wakeen’s rest was up and running. It sounds like it was a beautiful place to live before all of this nonsense erupted.

 It’s fun and Wyll makes you feel seen and appreciated. He still isn’t Astarion, but you know it will take some time before you can look at someone else and that’s okay.

 Wyll walks you back to camp and you don’t bother to look over at Astarion’s tent nor do you go that way like you usually would. You noticed he was back and so was Shadowheart. Both of their clothes were ruffled- it’s been at least two hours so you can only imagine.

  “Good night, Tav,” Wyll kisses you on the back of the hand before engulfing you in a large hug that you gladly accept, “sleep well- tomorrow will be better.”

 You go to your bedroll and begin to open your healing magics book when a knock on your tent post gets your attention. Maybe it’s Wyll. He did say he enjoyed talking to you, maybe he wants to spend the night? That doesn’t seem overly realistic though- he is a perfect gentleman.

“Come in,” you say, still not looking up, “what’s up?” 

“I was hoping I may be able to get a small snack?”

 Oh. It’s Astarion.

 You just fed him earlier today before the party. Usually you would say yes, but Wyll is right- you can’t keep giving him everything and leaving nothing for yourself. 

“I- I am really sorry,” he frowns and his ears even droop, “I am just really tired and I don’t-“

“No worries, Tav.” He says with a forced smile on his face, “have a good evening.”

  You are shaking after he leaves the tent. You cannot believe you just did that. You set a whole boundary. 

 No he did not call you by a pet name nor did he flirt with you. Yes he frowned and it made your heart hurt, but you need to start putting yourself first. 

  You still cry yourself to sleep and you wake up early enough to wash your face with cold water- any evidence of your heartbreak is completely gone. 

     ***********************************************

 You have managed to really avoid Astarion for the last four, almost five days. You let him feed because you don’t want him to starve to death, but you found out that casting “calm” on yourself beforehand keeps your adrenaline from kicking up so you no longer react to him.

 You cry afterwards, obviously, but he doesn’t need to know that. He is right- he never did anything to make you believe he liked you and it was very naive of you to assume he did. However, you do commend yourself for your courage to try and you even walked away with your dignity. 

 At the end of the day, you are proud of yourself and you love yourself more than anything. You will continue your mission and continue to help people because you enjoy helping people. Right now, this group of weirdos needs you and you need you so that you all make it out of this nonsense alive.

 That is more than enough to keep someone busy.

 First there was a Hag to fight, then you unfortunately had to kill a monster hunter (you didn’t talk to Astarion about it afterwards, that is Shadowheart’s job), and fought a bunch of spiders off- which also brought up the Necromancy of Thay argument again. That was exhausting. 

 Astarion opened the door on a Bugbear and Ogre bumping uglies, you also had to really put your foot down so that he wouldn’t send a dark Gnome flying. He was quite frustrated with you, but he understood your reasoning enough to not do it. 

 Then there were the Gnolls and Astarion had opened the chest which caused the Zhentarim guild to attack and try to make you all explode. Thankfully you were able to save that weird artist, but no one from the guild survived. 10/10 supplies though. 

 There are things to be done and places to see. Exploring the Underdark first made the most sense. It upset Lae’zel, but she said she trusts your judgment which warms your heart. 

 It is certainly not a quick or easy journey to get to the entrance inside the abandoned temple of your Goddess. You can hear Shadowheart saying snarky things- Astarion snorts here and there, but doesn’t actually chime in for once. 

 At least you get some relief from that for a day. You wrap your hand around your Moondrop pendant and you already feel the love of Selune flow through you. You kept the statue as well and you keep it next to you- last night you actually slept with it in your hand. 

 You had grown up exceptionally poor and your parents died from some disease in the mines where you were all imprisoned. The mine was eventually raided by Selune clerics and paladins- you immediately knew that is what you wanted to be. Selune had saved you right before you were being shipped to another location and you lived with her clergy ever since.

 You were grateful you had a potion of flying as well as the support of the others to keep the moonstone. Even Astarion expressed his approval when Shadowheart became upset. You waited until it killed the Minotaur, of course. The splash of blood that hit the group wasn’t necessarily welcome, but oh well.

  And at least you don’t have a ridiculous name.

 You snicker to yourself as you walk- earning an odd look from Gale who is covered in Minotaur blood. You urge him to keep talking about whatever book he finished last night and he gladly dives back into the subject. 

 Finding a decent spot to camp was actually pretty easy. The camp is beautiful and your tent is set up next to Karlach’s. She convinces you to make a massive tent fort and Fort Tavlach is born. 

 You pass a bottle of wine back and forth as you talk. Karlach is letting you hug Clive as you talk about the tiefling party and the aftermath of everything.

“Is that why those two are sitting next to each other so miserably?” 

You cock your head to the side, “what do you mean?”

“What I mean is they look miserable and haven’t stopped fighting for the last three days,” Karlach states with a raised eyebrow, “have you really not been paying attention?”

 You shake your head. Karlach gapes at you, chugging a bit of the wine before passing it back.

“Well- I have been waiting to tell you all day, but Shadowheart finally told me what they were fighting about.”

 “Oh, Karlach, I really should-“

“Two nights ago, they tried to be intimate again and he said your name during the act itself.”

 You simultaneously choke on and spit out your wine- some of it comes out of your nose. You can’t stop coughing and Karlach is dying laughing- she is crying she is laughing so hard. You are crossing your arms and uncrossing them in front of your face- a look of bewilderment as you process what just happened.

“mE!?”

 This just makes Karlach laugh even harder, she goes running straight for behind a rock- screaming that she is going to pee herself.

 The entire camp is looking over in curiosity and you just wave awkwardly. You catch Astarion’s gaze from the corner of your eye and he looks sad- maybe even a little angry.

 He storms off to his tent and Shadowheart rolls her eyes, glaring at you before going off to her own tent. 

 Karlach eventually comes back and you both continue your drunken gossip.

“That- that can’t possibly be true,” you say, “I asked him on a date and he told me I was naive to think he would ever want to be with me that way.”

“What!?” Karlach looks like she may light the entire camp on fire, “why didn’t you say something! We could have-“

“No,” you chastise, “he is right. It was naive of me to assume- my hurt is no one else’s fault. I also chose to give him everything I had. 

“He doesn’t owe me, I wanted to do those things,” you affirm, Karlach is smiling softly, “I still adore him, of course, but this is for the best, you know? Wyll says it means I can set my sights elsewhere now that I know Astarion isn’t into me.” 

“That is very big of you. Look at you in your big kid pants.”

You roll your eyes and give her a playful shove.

“He has been hurt and used enough for a dozen lifetimes- I don’t want to contribute to that hurt.” 

“You are a good person, Soldier,” Karlach hands you the bottle of wine, “you know- Halsin would be an amazing lover. I am sure of it.”

 “You think?”

“Oh ho- let me tell you what I think, Soldier-“

 Karlach goes into her wild theories and you try so hard to listen intently, but your drunken mind is stuck on Astarion and wondering if he is okay.

[adventuringblind]

is oscar the only driver you do autistic!reader for? if not can I request lando x daniel x autistic!reader.

any situation is fine I don't mind 😊

My love, my life, and nerodivergent partners in crime

Daniel Riccairdo x reader x Lando Norris

Genre: angsty fluff (I think)

Summarry: How Daniel managed to keep two nerdiverdent young adults in line... nobody will ever know

Warnings: Lando is ADHD coded, and you can't change my mind (and he's dyslexic anyway), AGE GAP, Max loves to tease

Notes: I am officially only taking requests for poly reader inserts at this time. Also, do Lando and Daniel have a ship name?!?! I need this information for my masterlist, please, and thanks.

Masterlist

Everyone always wondered why Daniel Ricciardo trailed behind Lando Norris and his girlfriend by three steps. People have theorized its because he's thirdwheeling. Some say the pair doesn't pay attention to him.

The real reason, though? It's his way of showing he cares in the paddock.

Max teases him about it all the time and is the only one who gets away with it. The two younger are, however, a chaotic mess. They can not make it from one place to another without something happening. So Daniel trails behind them a few steps to make sure they make it to their destination.

It's certainly wasn't an ideal way to get together. Especially because Daniel is older than both by more than is socially acceptable by most.

Ironically, none of them were together when Daniel started at McLaren. An Australian who smiles a lot, a Brit who is loose lipped, and a shy little psychologist who hates talking until you get her on driver brains and how they work. What could possibly go wrong?

She started work at McLaren the year before Daniel. Something in the strategy department. She watches and listens and somehow can predict what the drivers are going to do, what they need to perform, and how their opponents might respond. Lando says it's a superpower. Daniel says she's autistic and watches how people behave for a living (she agrees with him).

The three of them got along better than anyone wants to admit. The world saw then as awkward and dysfunctional. Which wasn't a lie, but it's also just their combinations of personalities.

Daniel picked up on it first. The stolen glances and blushed cheeks. Then, drunk confessions happen. Neither of the younger two like drinking. Which is ridiculous, in Daniel's opinion. Or maybe it was ridiculous because he's the one who drunkenly confesses to the pair while they attempt to get him back to his room.

Supposedly, Max was there and heard everything. Daniel denies this relentlessly.

Lando picked up on the confession, confronted him about it, and then awkwardly kissed him on his tip toes (he was shorter then).

The biggest hurdle was the female. The one who studies people. The one who can predict what Daniel is going to have for lunch on Friday at two because he likes to eat later.

She's clueless.

Lando tries to tell her. Daniel attempts sober. She doesn't get it.

The two have to put it in the form of a business meeting and tell her until she gets it. That seems to work as they end up going on a date post confession.

If he's being honest, half the time love them is really just making sure they are getting along with the world. Not people, the environments they end up in (which often includes the people).

So Daniel walks three steps behind them. The people tease on socials. They edit him in tiktoks. But he could care less.

He loves his two nerodivergent partners. He loves their little quirks and they way they see the world. So Daniel determines he's okay being behind them. Because he loves them and wants nothing more than to watch out for his partners in crime.

[mrs-kodzuken]

Can I have a timeskip!Ushijima comfort fic? Like Ushi doesn't understand the concept of skinship like holding hands and hugs so he often shrugs off reader's attempts in skinships, which of course made reader feel sad ㅠㅠ

Thank you and have a nice day! <3

Understanding you ♡

Pairing: Aged up! Wakatoshi Ushijima x fem!reader

WC: 1.6k

Genre: slight angst to comfort/fluff

CW: fem!reader, inexperienced in relationships!Wakatoshi, slight angst from ushi :( , fluff and comfort all in the end :)) , maybe some self deprecation from reader, best friends with tendou, communication is always key

note: thank you for requesting this! I hope it’s up to your expectations, sugar!! <3

˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖ ˖⁺‧₊˚♡˚₊‧⁺˖

Being the girlfriend of the Wakatoshi Ushijima was something I didn’t expect would hurt this much. As his girlfriend, I understood the importance of volleyball since it quite literally is his career path. However, being in a relationship is a whole other aspect to think about.

There never really was anything that really stood out to me about his wrongdoings. He always made it to every dinner plan, he didn’t forget the classic month to month anniversaries, he seemed like he was just a gift from heaven.

I knew it was too good to be true when I realized we, or I, was severely lacking in the physical department of our relationship.

Ushijima and I never really got closer within touching or skin-ship distance. That really sucked for me and hurt my feelings since he aced every other aspect of our relationship, no pun intended.

I wasn’t sure if he was just uncomfortable with touching me or if he had some kind of weird feeling about touching me. However, with physical touch being my number one priority of love language I wasn’t sure how to go about telling him my feelings.

Giving Wakatoshi free rein to plan out his schedule, except for date nights, was a must. He is a grown man and I’m not his mother, but I always felt bad when there was something important, like this, to be talked about.

I couldn’t help but to bite my lip as I stared at our private text messages. His contact name, ‘Ushi baby’ stared right back at me whilst I tried to work up the courage to send a text.

Deciding against it, I threw my phone onto my bed and sighed loudly. He was at practice and had a game tomorrow so I didn’t want to bother him or cloud his mind with meaningless things like what I need to talk about.

I couldn’t help to wallow in my own pity. The clock on my white painted walls doing nothing but making the sound of ticking throughout my room which eventually annoyed me enough to leave.

It was around the time for Ushi’s practice to be over and I really wanted him to come over, I just didn’t know how everything would go.

Whenever we had first started dating I got introduced, and interviewed, by Wakatoshi’s best friend, Tendou. And now, Tendou was one of my closest friends so I decided to call the Chocolatier himself for support.

After the phone had rang for three seconds it picked up, “Hello! Hello!” the familiar voice sounded throughout my kitchen.

“Hey Ten! I am in need of advice and company.” I admitted due to the facetime call revealing his apron on with some stains of colors on it.

“Oh really?” He asked, drawing out the ‘really’.

“Yes, really. I need to talk to Wakatoshi, I’m just not sure how. Any ideas?”

“That depends on what you’re going to talk to him about. Saying the wrong thing could make him easily misunderstand what you mean and vice versa.” Tendou tried to poetically explain, as if I didn’t already know that.

“Yeah, thank you so much,” I rolled my eyes, “I’m feeling a bit.. lonely in our relationship lately. I need more physical affection from him and I’m not sure how to really bring it up because times that’s happened before.”

That little spill from me made memories pop up into my head of Ushijima rejecting my attempts for physical love.

I could only remember how he shrugged himself away from holding my hand or kissing me after I brought him a well-balanced lunch meal one day during practice.

I never felt more embarrassed or ashamed in my life. My own boyfriend rejected my advances to give him, and to receive love from him in front of his entire team.

It wasn’t the only time that that had happened. I tried doing it behind closed doors just in case he didn’t like publicly displaying affection. However, that didn’t work either when he moved away from me one night after being out to dinner.

From that point on it’s just been messaging, very little facetime, some phone calls, and occasionally visiting each other’s apartment. I wasn’t sure how to proceed with this, and I certainly didn’t think it was anywhere near enough to breaking up.

However, that doesn’t mean he didn’t hurt my feelings nor have been continuing to hurt them. Whether on purpose or not.

With Ushijima being a member of the Schweiden Adlers, I knew some of his teammates and occasionally talked with them about how my boyfriend was doing time to time.

However, I couldn’t help to not reach out to them within the last couple of weeks. I didn’t have the courage to confidently ask about him.

Tendou’s voice brought me back to where I needed to be, which was having this conversation to communicate my needs across to him.

“And since knowing him for a while helps my understanding, I think a simple conversation would do the trick. Honestly, I’m not sure why you called if you knew that too?” He questioned me, eyes peering dangerously close to mine through the tiny phone screen.

I bit my lip, “It’s just… he has a game tomorrow. I don’t want to ruin that by spouting dumb nonsense about how I’m not feeling this or that from him.”

Growing up, I’ve always considered other peoples thoughts, opinions, feelings before mine. It was just the kind of person I was, and now it hurts me the most when I need to express myself.

“Girl. Fuck that game.” He rolled his eyes at me.

“Yes Wakatoshi loves his career and it’ll always be there but you’re something in his life that can disappear at any moment. I think he’d want to know,” Tendou tried reasoning with my dumb logic as he pointed a wooden spoon in my direction.

I gave up. I knew in the back of my mind that Tendou was definitely right and I wasn’t but it was my own self that was keeping me from doing what I needed to do.

“Alright, I think I’ll ask him to come over tonight then.” I tried to say confidently after I made up my mind of what needed to be done.

“Great! When I’m in Tokyo next I’ll be sure to bring a little something for you and him.” Tendou winked at me before ending the facetime call.

That only left me to do one thing, text my boyfriend. I quickly sent him a text asking if it would be okay for him to come over after practice.

My nerves were all over the place as I waited for the tall, olive haired man to show up at my place.

Soon the door bell brought me out of my mind trance and when I opened the door I saw the one and only Ushijima.

“Hey Toshi, come in,” I widened the door after taking a good look at him.

It seemed like he came here right out of practice, he was still in his whole practice uniform. His usual stoic face didn’t change once I sat down on to my living room couch.

“Is something the matter, (Y/n)?” He bluntly asked, getting straight to the point with me.

I took a deep breath to prepare myself, “Yes, Toshi. There is something the matter. My feelings are hurt and have been hurt for a while due to the lack of physical touch in our relationship.” I paused for a moment to look over his face.

He seemed to be intently listening on every word I was saying which gave me the impression to keep going.

“I just want more skin ship with you like hugging, kissing, hang holding, or even just sitting beside you with arms touching. I feel deprived of that because you seem to always move away when I try to initiate it. Is there a reason or..?” I trailed off, finishing what I was saying and asking a question to see his side.

“I’m sorry for making you feel that way, (Y/n). I don’t understand the idea of that. It makes you feel more loved than usual?” He asked, trying to work around in his head of what I had mentioned.

“Well, yes. Without it I feel upset or rejected by you sometimes.” I hung my head low a bit, it was embarrassing having to discuss this. However, I was always one to get embarrassed or ashamed at anything I needed.

“I will try, for you.” He promised, his large hand reaching over to me and placing it on my knee. He was very warm and it traveled through my body.

I smiled a bit, “Thank you, I really appreciate it. I’m sorry for not telling you sooner.”

I scooted closer to him on the couch and he gave me his one million dollar small smile that I love. His arms wrapped around my shoulders whilst I hugged his torso. His lean but built, very built, body touched my soft one, I loved this feeling.

We stayed like that for a minute, nothing heard but the low volume of my living room TV and our breathing.

“Thank you, Toshi. I really appreciate that you’ll try for me.” I pulled away, already missing the hug but needing to say that to his face.

“Of course, love.” His hand came up to caress my face and I leaned into his touch.

The aching in my heart and body went away after discussing that with him. It was all just a bit miscommunication which was easily fixed after I expressed what I needed to.

I couldn’t be more content.

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a/n: I hope you enjoyed anon!! I’m terrible at writing for Ushijima but thank you for helping me extend the people I can write for :))

you all know my header rules, if not see pinned post!!

[minty364]

DPXDC Prompt #142 Part 2

His parents had spent years working on their portal, to the point where they were neglecting their own children. Danny didn’t know any better, neither did Jazz. To them it was just how their family ran and for the most part it worked for them. It allowed Danny to really study space and the Stars. His room was covered with different ship models on the shelves, glow in the dark stars on the ceiling and posters on the walls.

Jazz had similarly explored her own thoughts and topics as she studied Psychology. Her room was more feminine but still had a certain scientific decorum to it.  

He never thought that he’d suddenly be ripped from all the things he loved. But here he was with the trench coat man, instead of taking some biology class or something.

“What happened with the portal?” Danny asked.

The man took a long sigh, “listen… quite a lot of shit went down after your accident.” 

“That tells me nothing,” Danny glared at the man.

“I get your upset kid, but let me at least know your name. Mine's John Constantine,” 

“…Danny,” Danny muttered after a moment. He wasn’t sure he trusted the man but he guessed he had no choice. He was also noticing he felt a bit off, it was the weirdest gut feeling and Danny was having trouble telling exactly what the feeling was. It was like the feeling was telling him to trust John, although at the same time John had this weird feeling about him that had Danny feeling weary. He decided to trust John just a little, hopefully it got him back home, after a moment Danny spoke again, “…Can you at least tell me if the portal worked?”

The room was silent for a moment and then John spoke “Alright, fine, I’ll tell you what happened but some background first, do you know who the ancients are?” 

The name didn’t sound familiar, “Ancients? Like Ancient Aliens or something?” 

“No, no…” John took a swig from a flask in his pocket and then started fiddled with an unlit cigarette he pulled from a different pocket. He then looked Danny up and down, “You don’t know the first thing about the infinite realms do you?”

“The what?” None of this was making any sense and the more Danny talked to this guy the more he was getting a feeling of dread in the pit of his stomach. Something about this conversation felt wrong, like Danny should know all of this already but he just didn’t. 

“Right well… I guess the easiest way to explain this is the portal your parents made was to the infinite realms.” John said, putting the cigarette in his mouth.

“My parents called it the Ghost Zone.” Danny muttered.

John seemed to chuckle at that, “I mean it is mainly inhabited by ghosts, however they aren’t the only ones, far from it in fact. I’m sorry but… I couldn’t allow your parents unlimited access to the realms. I had to disable it and prevent it from being reactivated.”

Danny felt a little disheartened after hearing that, he guessed John was probably right though. He remembered hearing his parents talk about how they’d dissect every ghost they found to study them. The bully’s at his school often bullied Danny over it especially after his dad and mom would continually embarrass him on parent teacher nights and on field trips.

Danny let out a small sigh, “so when can I go home?”

John looked a little surprised, his eyebrow quirked up, “so you're unaware of your situation right now?”

“Situation?” Danny trailed off, he remembered getting shocked and then he remembered waking up here, “where are we?”

John let out another sigh, “shit, well from my research you're supposed to know everything about your powers when you wake up.”

This made no sense to Danny, powers? Danny didn’t have powers, he didn't have the meta-gene.

“Powers? I don’t have the meta-gene. I think you have the wrong person.” Danny stated as he folded his arms in front of himself.

“Then how are you floating?” John asked with a smirk.

Danny looked down and he indeed was floating just an inch off the bed, he wondered when that started but the feeling threw him off a little as he stumbled a little trying to keep himself upright. It didn’t work and he fell back down on the bed with a little thud. He turned to see John watching him with a small hint of amusement in his eyes. 

“What am I?” Danny asked, his voice small and a little panicked.

“You, Danny Fenton, are an Ancient. I know the term makes it seem like you're old but the term is more because your people are ancient in age.” The explanation made no sense to Danny but he could somehow float now. He thought the term ‘Ancient’ was a little much for some floating powers.