#how many chickens fit in a coupe?

[godddamnbranman]

just one angel away from blocking out the devil

[tilltheendwilliwrite]

Reflections

Chapter Four

Master List / Real People Master List / Reflections Master List

Pairing: Mia MacAlsdair x Au Tom Hiddleston

Warnings: second hand embarrassment, Mia's a badass, confrontations, 18+ Minors do not interact

A/N: I apologize in advance should my Scottish/English interpretations be incorrect. I am Canadian playing in a world of my own making. Do not @ me.

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~

A month passed swiftly, and Mia settled into her new life with a gracious heart. She knew just how wrong everything could have gone and how blessed she was that it hadn't. The reality was, her blessing was so great, it was almost too good to be true, and for the first week at Ashwood Farm - the name of her grandparents' home - she woke every morning, opened her eyes to the wood and dab ceiling, and sighed in relief because it wasn't a dream.

Once, a very long time ago, the farm ran sheep, but in the last few generations, the MacAlasdairs had moved into acquiring business holdings instead. Still, there were a few horses, a flock of ducks and geese, and a coup of chickens along with Jasper and Eddie - the pair of farm dogs, a golden retriever and a border collie. They were very friendly, and every day, when Mia walked the border fence of stone, they went along with her. 

The dogs belonged to Henry, who looked after the animals and grounds. According to Cora, he was in his early forties and a confirmed bachelor. A little gruff around the edges, he wore his beard scruffy and a knit cap pulled low, taming his head of copper curls. He had the physique of a man used to hard labour, and if Mia hadn't recently come out of a disaster of a relationship, his deep voice and fit body might have given her pause, but as it was, she felt little in the way of attraction though the man was good looking. Hazel eyes watched her whenever Mia crouched to pet the dogs or stopped to stroke the horses' soft noses. 

He'd introduced himself that first day with almost an annoyed growl, stared hard at the bruises around her eye, then turned on his heel with a command to follow him when Mia asked about her grandfather's woodworking shop. 

She expected him to lead her to a quaint little shed, not a miniature stone cabin with big, bright windows. It had a great pot belly stove in the corner, long work benches, shelves, and miles of storage. Though it was currently covered in dust and wood chips, half the cottage seemed dedicated to a lounge area where her grandfather likely sat to read, drink, or spend time with friends in his 'mancave.'

The idea of it made her giggle, and Henry cast her a curious glance, before telling her he could assist in cleaning out the space if she wanted to take it over. 

Mia thanked him but ultimately declined. Her grandad's half-finished pieces would remain, though she would put them up on display, and until she knew what to do with them, his tools and extra pieces of wood could be packed up and placed in a corner out of the way. 

Within a few days, she had her studio set up between her grandfather's work benches and his sitting room. The long tables would give her a drying area, while the space in the middle had the best light.

Once she was all set and working again, Cora visited under the pretense of bringing her tea - they both knew she was snooping - but Mia didn't mind. But when Cora gasped and gushed over Mia's paintings, exclaiming at what she was seeing, Mia blushed. 

She knew they were good, having sold many at craft fairs and gained a few commissions from people she met, but the validation was nice. 

Mia painted portraits on mirrors sourced from auctions, thrift stores, yard sales, pretty much anywhere she could buy a decent piece of glass or a pretty frame. She called them Reflections for the care that went into the work, and it was a multi-step process to create. 

First, the outline of the portrait was marked, and the underside of the picture was painted. For commissions, she liked to talk with the person about their goals, hobbies, great loves, and the things that filled their soul. Those things were painted on the mirror, but backward, like window painters who created the outline first so the image could be properly seen from the outside. 

One had to peek behind the paint to see the inner reflection. 

Then, on a second piece of glass, cut to fit the mirror perfectly, she painted the portrait of the individual. She kept them as photo-realistic as possible but did so with bright colours. A portrait could be blue and pink and yellow, orange or green; it really depended on how she felt at the time of the painting or the requests made by the customer.

Then, the pieces were sandwiched together, creating a double effect. One had to look closely to see the inner understanding of a person's soul in the reflection. 

It had taken years for Mia to perfect her craft, and she still had to make sure she sourced the correct kind of mirror to give her the depth she needed. She would need to find new suppliers now that she was in Scotland, but there was an auto shop in town that did windshield repair, and upon finding out who she was, the owner appeared happy to deal with her. 

Now, a month in, she knew quite a few villagers by name thanks to the shopping trips with Cora, who gleefully introduced her around. 

It seemed Cora made bread, pies, and other amazing pastries for the farmers market that took place monthly. Much of the fruit and veg came from the gardens and orchards around the house. When Cora asked if she would still be alright with that, offering the same deal - fifteen percent of her earnings for using the kitchen and harvesting Mia's land - Mia agreed but knocked the price down to ten percent. Cora argued that fifteen was perfectly fair and refused to pay a penny less. Sighing, Mia relented but asked if Cora would mind her tagging along to the market. 

This was when Cora somehow convinced Mia to open a booth with her artwork beside Cora's. 

And thus, on a blustery May day, Mia - the proud owner of a new pop-up awning - was finishing setting up beside Cora.

They left up two walls on each tent to keep out the wind but kept the ones at the front and between their booths open, just in case Cora got busy and needed a second set of hands. 

Mia displayed what she could do around her booth, on tables and hanging from quickly sourced Amazon finds. Some paintings were full-sized in gilt frames, propped on easels, or hanging from hastily erected wire. Smaller paintings, those the size of regular printer paper, sat in cardboard boxes like old records waiting to be flipped through. And still more, pendants Mia painted with hyper-realistic flowers under glass hung from little stands.   

Henry hadn't seemed too keen on helping, but Cora browbeat him into packing the truck and getting them to the town square in Kelso early in the morning. 

It had been a long time since Mia exhibited, and though she was excited, she was also nervous. Most people now knew she was a MacAlasdair. Would they think she was cheeky for attempting to sell her art at a decent price when she didn't need the money?

Her fears were unwarranted when people began to trickle by. Soon, Cora was doing a hopping business, and Mia was busy talking about what she did and why. 

Throughout the morning, she found three people interested in commissions and eagerly handed out hastily made-up business cards. 

She just finished up with a woman wondering if she could do something similar to commemorate the loss of her husband's best sheepdog - to which Mia gave an enthusiastic yes, she would love to paint a dog - when Cora called her name. 

Friendly smile plastered on, she turned to find a stunning brunette, two young boys - their faces sticky from something sweet and chocolatey - and a tall, strapping man. 

"Mia, ye've not met the Hiddlestons of Highpark Castle. This is Emma Bruce, her lads Keegan and Calvin, and Kristopher Hiddleston."

She crossed to stand behind Cora's baked goods covered table and held out her hand to the woman. "It's a pleasure. I see your home every day on my walk."

Emma grinned, her blue eyes bright and sparkling. "I've heard so much about you already! The whole village is buzzing regarding our new Canadian transplant. How are you adjusting?"

Mia laughed and shook the firm grip, smiling at the boys. "Just fine for the most part. There's been a bit of culture shock and a steep learning curve, but I'm figuring it out." She leaned closer and stage whispered, "But if you happen to have a Scot's saying dictionary, I would like to borrow it."

"Ock! Yer fine. Ye always blink like an owl when ye dinnae ken something," Cora huffed. 

Emma laughed and winked. "Try being married to one. The brogue gets thick, and even I struggle."

"I did wonder," Mia chuckled, her accent very posh English. 

"That's what happens when a Scottish keep ends up in the hands of an English Lord," the man laughed, holding out his hand. "It's a pleasure, Mia. Please, call me Kip. Everyone does. And I must say, I adore what you're doing here." 

Hand firmly caught in his, Mia allowed him to tug her back into her booth, where he oozed charm and cooed over her work. 

"I would love to have one of these for my fiancée. She would adore it!" he proclaimed, causing Mia to frown. 

"Fiancée?" she murmured, glancing at Emma.

Kip snickered. "She's my sister."

"Oh!" Mia blushed. Emma said she was married to a Scot, and Kip was the upper crust side of an English accent, but she and Kip looked nothing alike beyond the bright blue of their eyes. 

Emma was short with a petite, curvy frame and dark hair. Kip was tall and fit, more like a runner than a lumberjack. His sandy blond hair had a touch of copper, but not enough to call it strawberry, just enough to make it shine with red lights, even with the grey and cloudy sky hiding the sun.

"Don't trouble yourself, love," he winked, his smile flashing straight white teeth. 

"Ignore him, Mia," Emma quipped. "He's just annoyed you're not fawning all over him."

Mia frowned. "Why would I?"

"Ugh! I'm destroyed. My heart will never be the same," the man pouted as Emma's boys laughed. 

They looked about seven and ten and immediately made fun of their uncle. 

"Looks like your fame hasn't spread to Canada, Uncle Kip!" Keegan snickered. 

"Yeah, guess you have to try harder," Calvin giggled. 

Kip huffed and playfully locked both boys in headlocks. "Bah! Perhaps Mia doesn't like movies, television, or theatre?" 

"I like movies," Mia muttered, still perplexed. "I also like TV."

The boys burst out laughing. "See! Not that famous!"

Kip pouted. "Mia, darling, come on! Throw a man a bone. The Essex Serpent? Crimson Peak? Kong: Skull Island? For pity's sake, woman! Thor Ragnarok?"

"Ragnarok?" Mia tilted her head. "You were in Ragnarok?"

Kip raised his hands, triumphant. "Yes! I played Loki."

She blinked, arched a brow, and scowled. "Oh, you're that guy."

"I beg your pardon?"

Mia sighed and thrust a hand through her hair, muttering, "Odin's one eye," before forcing a smile. "Look, no offence, but I prefer the other guy."

Emma squeaked and slapped a hand over her mouth, but her eyes danced with utter delight. 

"Other guy?" Kip asked, crossing his arms. 

"Yes, the one in the first two Thor movies and Avengers. I'm not great with actor names, which is probably why I didn't recognize yours, but I never understood why they replaced the other guy. He made an incredible Loki. I was impressed." As was the God he portrayed, though her Loki was still annoyed about the hair. "I thought he put real passion into the role and gave him such depth of emotion. Nothing was more powerful than when he confronted Odin about being a Frost Giant. The utter hurt and betrayal gave me goosebumps. And in Avengers, when he was fighting Thor on the tower, and that single tear trickled down his cheek at sentiment." Mia shook her head. "Magic."

Kip stared, mouth agape, while Emma beamed, and the boys giggled like they had a secret. 

"What? I know I can get a little passionate-"

"Tom!" Emma squealed. "It was Tom! Our brother Tom played Loki in the first three movies."

Heat burned through Mia's face. Talk about fawning like an idiot. And to his family, no less. 

"Gods, I'm so embarrassed," she groaned, slapping a hand to her forehead. 

"No, no, darling," Kip chuckled. "I agree. Tom was a better Loki than me. Would that he could have continued excelling as an actor."

"Unfortunately, our parents passed away unexpectedly," Emma murmured sadly. "The estate and responsibilities fell on Tom as the heir. He gave it all up to come home and take over as Lord of Highpark."

"And allowed me to rise under my own star," Kip smiled gently. "Had he stayed in the industry, I know many of the roles I've won would never have come my way. He put me forth to replace him in many of the parts earmarked for him, and when Ragnarok came up, it was because of our near-identical looks and voice that I was granted that opportunity as well. I owe my brother quite a lot," he murmured, staring at her curiously. 

Suspicion caused Mia to squint at him. "What?"

"Hm? Oh, nothing. Nothing. Now, back to my commission." 

He began talking about his fiancée, going on about how they just had a baby and how she was an actress rising on the Hollywood stage. He spoke about how they met doing Broadway and thought she would adore Mia's work. 

With her birthday coming soon, he wanted to surprise her with something unique and special, and Mia's art was right up that alley. 

Mia nodded along, making notes on her phone as they went, jotting down everything from the size he desired to her favourite colours to little tidbits Kip doled out about how great of a mom she was and how happy they were together. 

The love fest gave Mia a pang in her chest, but she didn't let her smile waver.

Mia handed him a business card and asked him to email her so she could send him her contract and questionnaire. She informed him her commissions were first come, first served, and if he didn't want to wait for his painting to act soon as she already had a few interested parties.

Kip snorted, pulled out his phone, and shot off an email as she stood watching, amused.

Mia's phone pinged. She pulled it from her pocket, read the subject line, and burst out laughing. "Do me first? You're lucky I enjoy a quirky sense of humour."

"I thought you might," Kip snickered, tucking her business card away with his phone before the boys tugged at his hands. "Speak soon, Mia!" 

She chuckled along with Cora and Emma as the obviously bored children dragged him away. 

"It was a pleasure, Mia. Come by the house one day. We'll have tea. I'd love to get to know you better," Emma smiled. "Any time, any day. I'm usually free."

"I'd like that," Mia agreed. "I'll let you know when Kip's portrait is finished. We can kill two birds."

"Lovely," Emma nodded, giving a little wave as she headed off. "I should rescue Kip before the boys convince him more ice cream before lunch is a good idea."

"Bye!" Mia waved, watching them go. 

"So…"

She turned to face a smirking Cora and arched a brow. "What?"

"Familiar with our Tom, are ye?"

Mia's face burned, and she hurriedly turned away. "Stuff it, old woman."

Cora cackled and went to speak with a customer.

~

In a lull around mid-afternoon, Mia escaped her booth to walk around. Cora assured her she would hand out cards to anyone interested, and said she'd heard Mia's spiel enough times to give the speech herself if necessary but would call her to come back if someone wanted to speak with her. 

Mia walked the market with genuine interest, happily stopping to sample what she could where she could or stop and talk to the fibre artists, potters, and wood carvers when they weren't busy with other customers. 

She wound up the proud new owner of three gorgeous wool sweaters, a cute purple toque - though she confused the poor woman when she called the knit cap that - and matching mittens. She bought a pair of heavy mugs in a black glaze speckled with white and shot through with smears of colour. They looked like galaxies on clay, and she had to own them. And when she stopped at the wood carvers tent, a bowl of ebony wood with a high polish caught her eye, as did a matching carved raven. 

Mia headed back to her booth with her treasures in tow and belly full of samples. 

Cora chuckled when she saw her. "I told ye to take a few bags."

"I did!" Mia laughed, tucking her finds under a table out of the way. "I ran out of room. There are just so many talented artisans here. Between the food, the drink, and the art, this could be a dangerous place to come to more than once a month."

Cora chuckled, but her laughter died on a gruff, "Canna help ye?"

Mia rose and turned to see a man in his mid-thirties, with brown hair and eyes, his long black coat twisting around his legs in the wind. He was staring at her, his face a mask of unreadable granite. 

Something about him gave Mia the willies. 

"Ye want something, Benedict Campell?" Cora snapped. 

The man cast her a disdain-filled glance before returning his focus to Mia. 

"I came to meet our new resident," the man said, his accent thick.

"Nice to meet you," Mia nodded, even as Cora snorted. 

A squint came to his eyes as he studied her before he stepped into Mia's booth. "Yer younger than I thought."

Mia frowned. "Thank you?"

"Braw, too." He took another step toward her. 

Mia pressed backward. The man sent chills up her spine. 

The quorking of a raven gave her courage, and she straightened her spine. She'd worked in customer service and dealt with worse creeps before. "Is there something you want, sir?"

He arched a brow, amusement curling his lips into a cruel smile. "I was hoping ye would sell Ashwood Farm to me."

Mia crossed her arms and lifted her chin. "Nope."

The other brow joined the first in his hairline. "Surely yer not staying in Kelso?"

"I am, I can, and I will."

"Ye've had yer answer, Campbell. Aff wit ye!" Cora demanded, stepping between them, her brogue thickening.

He sneered at Cora before glaring at Mia. "Think about it. I'll give ye a great price."

Mia snorted. "Gods, no. Please leave."

"Yer makin'-" 

Mia stepped around Cora and into the man so aggressively he stepped back in surprise, and she walked him backwards out of her booth. 

"My sign is No. My number is No. My answer is No. You need to let it go! Bye-bye now!" Yes, she did just quote a Megan Trainer song. No, she didn't regret it. 

Mia wiggled her fingers, cocked her head, and sashayed back into the tent. 

"This isn't over."

"Yep. It is. There's nothing that will make me sell the last link I have to my heritage and family, so please, kindly fuck off," Mia smiled sweetly. "Attempt to harass me in any way, and I'll set my lawyers on your mangy ass."

Campbell scowled and stalked off.

"Ock, now ye've done it," Cora snickered. 

"Done what?" Mia asked.

"That's Benedict Campbell. He's a high-mucky muck property developer. He's been after Ashwood Farm for years, but yer grandad always told him to feck off, too. So good on ye, but ye may want to give Fergus a call and let him know Campbell's up to his shenanigans again. Fergus had to cease and desist his arse once already."

"I'll do that," Mia murmured, glaring after the asshole. 

"Just ken, his da is Kelso's mayor."

Mia sighed and rolled her eyes. "Joy."

"Not to worry. You own the building the mayor's office resides in."

The utter glee Cora took in that fact made Mia laugh. "Well, eviction is always an option."

Cora snickered before eyeing Mia appreciatively. 

"What?"

"Ye stood up to him."

Mia shrugged. "Of course. He's just a bully and a chauvinistic pig."

Cora frowned and waved a hand in the direction of Mia's face. "I thought…"

"Oh. Yeah, no. That was a one-off, and after I picked myself off the floor, I threatened Colt with a lamp. I'm not a pushover, but five years of nitpicking beat me down. He was subtle and slow about it. It took taking the hit to wake me up. But no, I spent a lot of years in foster care. You toughen up quick."

"Mia," Cora murmured, pity crawling across her face.

She turned to fuss with the display she knocked over when Campbell caused her to retreat into the table. "It's not like I was abused, but you learn fast to be independent, and yeah, you figure out how to take a punch and throw one."

"Lord, love a duck," Cora muttered before grabbing Mia and yanking her down for a hug. "Well, no more. Ye've family in me now. Me and Henry. We'll look after ye."

"Thank you," Mia sighed. She didn't mean to upset Cora, but sometimes her filter… didn't. "I want you to know I'm really happy here, more so than I thought I would be. And I've met so many people. It's like I finally found… home."

"That's 'cause ye have, lass," Cora murmured. "Ye truly have."

Mia pulled back, her smile damp but still bright. "So… there's a booth at the end where the Anderson kids have a box full of kittens…."

Cora snickered and shook her head. "If yer getting one, get two. They can have a playmate. We'll train 'em to stay off my countertops, but they'll be good to keep down the mice."

"We have mice!" Mia hissed.

"In a house that auld? Of course, we've mice! But a couple wee kitties, and they'll solve the issue right quick."

Mia shuddered. "Yeah, okay, yeah. I'm getting two."

Cora chuckled. "Text Henry to come get ye. Ye can head to the store and get what's needed afore they close."

"I've always wanted a cat," Mia grinned and hugged Cora again. "Thank you, Cora!"

"Bah!" She flapped her hands, her cheeks red. "Tis yer house."

"But you live there, too, so if you didn't want them, I wouldn't get them."

Cora eyed her, bemused and shook her head. "Yer a good lass, a little strange but sweet. Now, gaun. Aff wit ye. There's a good dent in yer work, and mine, so packing up will be quick when yer back."

Mia giggled, nodded, and hurried off, pulling out her phone as she rushed to see if the kittens she fell in love with were still available.

~

As Mia settled down for bed that night, it was with a pair of furry bed warmers. The grey kitten with the black tiger stripes she called Tyr, and the white with the cinnamon mask, ears, tail tip, and toes she named Idunn.

They were wonderfully sweet, loving, and adorably affectionate. It surprised her how affectionate when they followed her around the house rather than running off to explore. 

There was no fear in the pair. She expected them to be skittish and hide under the furniture, but they didn't. They pounced along behind her, chasing her heels as she set up a litter box near the back entrance and a second in her bathroom. She wanted to keep the scamps with her at night for a while, just until they were comfortable, but she didn't need any accidents. 

Crawling into bed, she smiled when they scrambled up the bedding, jumped across the comforter, and climbed into her lap, where they snuggled together and began to purr. 

Mia smiled and stroked their soft fur as she looked around her room. 

Candles glowed on Loki's altar next to his new raven statue, a fire crackled in the fireplace, and fresh flowers bloomed on the mantle in a polished crystal vase. 

Beyond the windows, the night closed in around the farm. It was still overcast, so she couldn't see the stars, but there was hardly any light pollution on the farm. One day, she knew she would look up and see the glory of the cosmos again.

The night sky in Canada could be so majestic, but it was hard to see from the city. Out here, on Ashwood Farm, she imagined it would be spectacular. 

The presence beside her drew her from her musings. 

"Thank you."

For?

Mia looked up, but there was no one there. Not physically at least. 

She smiled and held out her hand. The warmth of someone grasping her fingers filled her with peace, comfort and joy.  

"Everything. I know you had a hand in all this."

If I did, you deserve it. The hardships of the past have not soured your spirit. You make me proud, girl.

Mia blushed and pulled her hand away. "Thank you, Loki."

If you really want to thank me, you will read the good parts out loud.

Mia laughed at his teasing. "You're terrible."

You love it.

Yeah, she did.

Next Chapter

[fragileizywriting]

cooking together (part one)

AO3 | Start Here | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

Chat Noir hasn’t spoken to her since she’s woken up.

To be fair, she doesn’t blame him. She doesn’t blame him in the slightest. How stupid of her to fall asleep on top of one of the most famous, most deadliest demons in the world— sleeping on top of him like he’s nothing more than a pillow. The great Chat Noir reduced to nothing but a cuddle buddy— oh how stupid of her. She’d cried in front of him— she’s done it before to the point where there is nothing of guilt left within her whenever it happens, and he’s never said anything before but comfort her. But sleep on top of him, oh, Tikki— what should she do now? Where does she begin?

They had sat there on either side of their couch, completely silent, each with their faces hidden behind their hands within moments of her scrambling to get off of him. No doubt Chat Noir was absolutely groaning to himself internally about how unlucky he is for getting stuck with a summoner that is absolutely desperate for affection like she is— to the point where she even latches onto him even during her sleep— oh, embarrassing! So embarrassing!

He must hate her, or find her absolutely weird— hell, maybe even find her to be the most incredibly annoying human he’s ever had the displeasure of meeting— oh, Tikki— guide her in what to do next!

He’d slipped away from the couch after a moment or two of silence, changed out of his clothes for something more fitting of the chores to do around their farm life, and had washed up in the washroom— leaving the house while muttering something under his breath about going to go check up on the hens.

She’s only now just gotten ready herself. It’s been a year or so since she’s gotten regular help with lacing her stays— it’s definitely doable by herself, of course, since she’s done it her whole life on her own— but Chat Noir usually helps her, claiming it's his job as a familiar to help her.

It’s always so much easier to do with an extra pair of hands, and no matter how much or how well she ties her hair to the side, she always ends up catching part of her hair in the loops whenever she does it by herself— so she’s been accustomed to being helped in that way. But by herself, goodness— the sensation of lacing herself and tucking the spare bits of string under the stomacher is almost foreign nowadays.

She’s put on her petticoat, too— it’s almost in the shape of a full-body apron, it too snagged at some parts of her hair.

She forgets how easy things in her life are, now that Chat Noir is there to help.

At least putting on her actual dress is a breeze. She’s picked her favorite wine-colored one, the one with the front closures this time, knowing that Chat has made no signs of wanting to return into the house and help her close it in the back. She can dress herself— she doesn’t need a powerful demon for help getting dressed— he’s not a maid. Besides, it’s not as if she’s gotten used to the domesticity.

She sighs to herself in the kitchen, trying not to peek through the window as she hears him corralling the hens outside the coup so he can bring in eggs. Oh, he’s gentle with their chickens, even if it seems he’s out of his element when he does so— he’s learned to behave around them over the year and months they’ve known each other, which is definitely good news. It’s almost as if he wants to be loved by the hens. The thought shouldn’t warm her this much, but it does— oh goodness— she tries beating down the feeling with a little slap to her cheeks, whining pitifully behind her palms.

Stupid. Stupid stupid stupid!

She needs to stop thinking about the concept of domesticity with him— oh, goodness, how she needs to stop— he’s a demon— and demons do not live in little, tiny cottages with their summoning witch. Demons do not live happily tending to hens and working on fencing a perimeter out the back of their land so that they can have horses and cows and sheep accessible as the years go on. Demons do not dream of coming home and placing kisses on their summoner’s cheeks and nuzzle with a purr. And demons definitely do not wish to talk about all the latest catch he and Luka got during their fishing escapades, bringing home barrels of fish hoisted onto a carriage so that they can sell and store!

Demons certainly do not entertain any notion of falling in love with a witch— goodness, of course they don’t— she’s certain that Chat Noir would be more excited to be doing actual demon work— whatever that may be— than to stay here and build up the posts for the fence. There is simply no way in hell that Chat Noir would rather be here.

She can stupidly dream and she can stupidly wish all she wants, but the moment that she brings back Adrien, Chat Noir will swallow her soul and disappear. She’s almost positive. After all, Ladybug she may be, but she’s nothing more than a witch that needs his help. A friend, sure— but— this is all just a transaction to him, is it not?

And yet, throughout all of this, she can’t stop herself from wishing. Wishing to wake up every morning in the same manner that she had today— pressed up against him, warm and safe, close enough to him that she could steal a kiss off of him— oh, she’s so silly, fantasizing about what she can’t have!

Maybe she can start with an apology gift— maybe he’ll talk to her then— he did say last night he wanted to try lover-honey cookies, after all.

It’s been years since she’s helped with the recipe, but she’s memorized it— even as she’d learned spells from her textbooks she’d bought off of traveling bookwagons, she also made sure to pay attention to her parents when they baked, just so that she knew how to make it in case they didn’t have any and she wanted to bring some for Adrien.

She’ll have to go into town to find a couple of things, they might be low on sugar— but it’ll be good for her to get out of the house— the more and more she stays inside the cottage, the more she’s bound to get cabin-fever from the amount of thinking that’s going on in her head.

Oh, but…

She leans on her elbows on the counter as she looks at the fire lily in the little vase she’s procured from the cabinets, sighing wistfully. The vase doesn’t do it justice, since it’s been such a long time since she’s decided to cut any flowers outside and bring some indoors— it is a little dusty and a little chipped, but that’s alright. The vase is far too wide to house just a single flower— it almost looks out of place without any surrounding foliage. Maybe she should go out in the backwoods and search for shrubbery or moss to accompany it, after making the cookies— something dark green, so it won’t take away from the flower.

It’s a beautiful lily— she’s never seen such a beautiful blossom before. Usually the lilies she’s seen and planted over the years have been spotted and freckled along the petals— very reminiscent of the freckles along her face— but this one is completely and totally unblemished, favoring instead just a beautiful gradient from orange to dark red at the tips.

It’s nothing like the trumpet-bell-shaped lilies she’s known to grow— this lily isn’t shy in the slightest in its bloom. It curls open, unafraid, desperate to attract bees and other pollinators to the honey-like smell of nectar— she sighs to herself as she continues to admire it.

It is lovely. So lovely.

She’s never received a flower before.

Oh, sure. She’s received many gifts before. Alix with her pocket watches that tick and tock so delicately they must simply be works of magic— Alya with her many books that she lends to her whenever she needs to learn new spells— Nino always buying their lunch or dinner whenever the two of them decide to get food together in town and Chat is off with another competition against Luka.

Oh, and sweet Luka, of course, with his snake oil bottles— with the pearl earrings he’s made for her, even if she can’t wear them because of the demonic seals tattooed onto her ears— the countless of songs he sings and writes for her when he’s finally on land.

But a flower?

How had Chat Noir known to give her one of her favorite flowers? A gorgeous fire lily— oh— if only she could keep it in this vase forever. Nothing compares to the honey scent that the fire lily produces— she smells it softly, bending down more onto the counter to smell the aromatics, taking note of the buds of pollen that are ripe to explode.

“Princess!”

She straightens her spine with a squeak, almost knocking over the vase in an attempt to stand up straight, looking out to the front door. “Yes? W-what’s wrong, kitty-cat?”

She takes to patting down her apron that lays flat across the slim boning of her stays, just to have something to do with her hands, trying not to look as nervous as she feels.

Chat Noir shoulders through the front door, a clucking brown ball under his arm, grinning like a fool. There are black smudges against his feet and pants already, as always, somehow finding a way to succeed every expectation and find a way to stain his clothes. “There’s absolutely nothing wrong— in fact— look! I found her with the other ladies— look— she’s even letting me hold her!”

Henrietta.

“My goodness, you’re right—” She pushes her braid back over her shoulder, making her way over to him and their hen. Henrietta is absolutely tame in his hands for a bird that is notorious for scampering the other way the moment Chat looks at her. Goodness, she’s so small— easily could fit through any crevice of any tree she’d found during the storm— no wonder she’d been impossible to spot during the storm last night after she’d slipped out of the coup.

Marinette takes Henrietta out of his arms once she’s close enough to reach for her, checking her over for signs of injury— but there’s absolutely nothing, sans the slight complaining she gives when transferring into another person’s arms. No feathers missing at the back of her neck, there’s no bleeding, there doesn’t even seem to be any scuffling on her feet or claws— her eyes look healthy and clean. Miraculously, the hen is perfectly fine— even clucking softly as she turns her over to check her undercarriage.

She could cry. “Oh, Chat, this is wonderful! She’s completely unharmed! Blessed be this little hen.”

“I told you she’d be okay,” Chat Noir’s ears twitch as he leans up against the doorframe.

She tucks Henrietta into her side just to have somewhere secure enough to place her. “Where did you find her?”

“She was on the other side of the fence, actually. She was trying to get back in but couldn’t figure out on how to jump the fence or get through the gap.” His smile comes out a little lopsided, diamond green eyes filled with joy.

“I’m so grateful that you found her, Chat. Oh thank Tikki she’s safe and sound,” She wipes at her cheek, trying to wipe away any tears that are threatening to form. Goodness, Henrietta is alright. What a miracle this is— she’d been so hard on herself the night before, wondering why she’d left the gate open— she’ll never do that again for sure. Definitely not, and definitely not during an active rainstorm no less. She’s learned her lesson.

“Oh.” He blinks slowly at her.

“What is it?”

“You—” Chat’s lips twitch on the side with a widening smile. He reaches to her to pet at her cheek with a clawed thumb, and she can’t help but follow his hand down to her cheek with widening eyes, biting her lip. “You have a stain on your cheek.”

“I do?”

He laughs. “Is it from the flower? You know, I’ve been told that it’s good fortune to be blemished by a lily.”

“I—” She can feel her cheeks heat. Oh, Tikki! “I— uh— I never knew that—”

He pauses, and something about his ears as they twitch downwards gives him the appearance of being apprehensive, but she can barely look away as she feels the heat of his hand up against her cheek— she’s so desperate to stop thinking about this being their new normal. What she would give to have mornings filled with loving touches— loving glances— loving moments such as this.

“Do you… not want me to touch you anymore?”

She blanches, feeling her heart sink into her socks. “What?”

“You’re kind of shying away—”

“No— please— I mean— I don’t mind you touching me— my— face. At all. Please.” Oh, Tikki. What did she do to deserve this? How does she make herself stop rambling? “Please continue— I—”

“Are you sure?” His lips thin, his voice quieting. “You… don’t look comfortable.”

“No, I promise, I’m very comfortable. So very comfortable.” She nods as well as she can without accidentally poking her eye out on the thumb that rests at her temple. It would just be her luck to be that careless. Her voice sounds almost weak as she continues to speak. “Extremely comfortable.”

“Are you lying? I don’t ever want to make you feel uncomfortable with me, Marinette.”

She squeaks when Henrietta decides to complain about being in her arms, trying to flap out of her grasp and try to fly onto the floor. “You don’t make me uncomfortable at all, Chat! Please don’t think that— I— you could never make me uncomfortable.”

“Here, let me—” He takes Henrietta out of her arms, tucking the little hen close to him.

“Oh, I—” She snaps her jaw shut. “You know, I have to leave.”

His eyes widen. She takes in the snap of his tail as he stands up straighter, his ears going ramrod straight, looking at her with such alarm that it almost shocks her herself— the tattoos on her ears start to burn as his magic flares. It flares more wide than tall, stretching to its limit, encompassing nearly everything around them, leaving her looking at him in awe at the actual expanse of his magic. Just how big of a reach does it actually have? Just how much of a range does Chat Noir’s magic go to? “Leave? Wait, where are you going?”

Oh, stupid! “I mean— I have to leave to go to the market to get more flowers. No— I mean— flour—”

“You’re leaving to get flowers?” He winces.

His magic continues to surge against hers, wider and wider, forcing hers to open up just as much in order to match his correctly. She can feel her magic stretch further than ever possible, trying to meet his from border to border, trying to push up against his in a perfect mirror. Is he… afraid? What is that feeling? She can’t place it at all. Why does her magic continue to try intertwining and swirling with his, trying to soothe him without her even directing it to?

“D-did you not like the lily?”

Oh, stupid little witch!

She takes a step back, noticing the way his eyes shine with sorrow she can’t place, and reaches for his arm. She can’t pull on it, not as he holds Henrietta, but she gives him a squeeze. “Oh, no, Chat, that’s not true at all. I loved the lily. My goodness, I’m in love— er, I mean, with the flower, of course— I’ve never gotten a flower before and I’m just so amazed that you ended up giving me my favorite flower— I just— please, Chat, it’s okay. Please don’t worry. It’s okay, kitty-cat. I love the gift too much to bear, almost.”

His ears flatten against his head. “Please don’t go.”

Sweet Tikki. At what point had her demon been convinced that she was taking back their demon seal agreements? After a full year of preparing for his help— why does Chat Noir believe that she doesn’t want him around for help anymore?

“I promise I’m not leaving, Chat, not permanently. I meant to say that I just need to go to the market to get flowder powder.” She scrunches her face, trying her hardest not to give herself another silly pat to the cheeks. “No— I mean— plowder flour. Oh, sweet Tikki. I need ingredients for the lover-honey cookie.”

“Powder flour,” His face relaxes, finally registering what she’s meant. She watches his relief spread across his entire body, starting from the way his ears sag slightly in a more comfortable position— his shoulders drop a smidge— his tail stops flicking— she can’t help but watch with a slack jaw as his magic starts to curl and coil its way back into shape, tugging at hers in a way that feels like he’s pulling her closer for a hug. She feels warm all over, giddy at having her magic being unfolded, matching his perfectly. She never knew she had so much of a range to her magic— what else is there about their connection that she doesn’t know about? “Do you mean a bag of flour?”

“Yes, flour,” She viciously nods her head, ignoring the curls in their magic as they push and pull against one another. “Do you— do you want to come with, so that you don’t feel like I’m leaving you?”

He perks up. “Do you want me to go with you?”

“Of course I do.” She wants him to stay with her forever.

“Ah. Actually, you know, it’s best if I finish up the post I was working on.” He looks upset at having to take it back, at least, giving Henrietta a loving brush with his claws from her neck down. “We don’t want the girls to keep escaping ever again, right?”

“Right. Yes. You’re completely right.” Oh, she could weep. How in the world did she manage this? “I’m going to go get our coin pouch, but I’ll be back from the market before you know it.”

“Right,” His ears twitch as he tries for a smile. “Yeah. Of course.”

-*-

“Stupid stupid stupid.” She tries not to kick up any of the dirt around her with her boots as she continues to walk down the path towards town. Oh, she’s miserable. Absolutely miserable. She never meant to hurt Chat Noir’s feelings in any way— her day dreams have made their interactions completely and totally awkward.

What is with her?

She needs to get her act together.

She has to.

Chat Noir doesn’t deserve her freaking out at every little touch and glance.

Oh, the way he looked at her, as if she were the one capable of burning him into a crisp, just by the way she had spoken about leaving. How could she ever do that to her Chat Noir? She wouldn’t dare even dream of it. Her earlobes burn at the sensation of having to pull away from Chat Noir’s magic— a curse, unfortunately, of having her soul bonded to the demon. It’s painful like a phantom pain— it’ll go away for a while just to come back and remind her that she’s too far away for their magic to reach and intermingle.

Although, now that she knows that his range can go much further, she’s tempted to believe that it must be psychosomatic. Maybe it’s her own worries being projected onto her own tattoos, but she’s not certain of it.

She stops to wipe at her eyes. Miserable. Absolutely miserable. She’s going to end up losing her friend this way, just because she couldn’t find it in herself to stop behaving like a lovesick girl batting and fanning her eyelashes at the first pretty boy she sees.

It doesn’t help that he’s pretty, either. With beautiful lashes and such a boyish smile that makes her heart rate go up and golden honey-colored hair and perfect green eyes— oh, Tikki! What should she do now?

She turns around, checking to see if she’s far away from the cottage to try to gauge if she can start screaming into her aprons without him hearing, only to see a black cat following along the dirt path with his tiny little paws. He meows at her, blinking slowly at her with green eyes, tilting his head just enough to imply that he’s asking a question.

She stares at him just a smidge.

“Oh. Did you decide you want to come with me?” She steps closer, infinitely grateful that she hadn’t started her desire to bury her face into the fabric of her dress.

Her magic curls against his on sheer instinct, but she registers something odd about it the moment their magic try to interlock. Usually it is nothing short of a perfect shape against each other, like their combined magic were made to fit together— but this feels like there are gaps. Where her magic should be filling in the gaps, instead, she finds her magic hesitating in some spots and areas, as if it is too shy to intermingle. She can’t find the edges to his magic at all, even as she tries stretching hers out manually and she wonders if he’s followed her because he’s afraid again.

Chat purrs when she picks him up. He’s a soft little thing, perfectly sweet and pliable in her arms as she turns him and pets along his chest, letting her hug him tight to her stays. She sighs into his forehead. The poor dear follows her to the market, truly concerned that she’s leaving… how can she ever allow herself to not tell him the truth, since the perfect moment is being presented to her now? “You know, I’ve never been considered a bold person, but I’m always willing to try if it’s for you.”

Chat’s tail flickers, giving her an indication that he’s listening.

“I’m sorry for hurting you today— it was never my intention to make you look so sad. Never in my life did I imagine that you would be upset at me leaving the house— I never want to see that face on you ever again, if we can avoid it.”

Her tattoos on her ears start to prickle at the words I want. After all, part of the rules of being her contracted demon is to take into account her wishes— however, she doesn’t want him to think she’s commanding him. Ever. He is always free to choose on what to do when she accidentally uses those words.

“I need to be honest with you.” She starts, desperate not to look down and attempt to gauge his reaction. “I do not want anything about our relationship to change, even after I say this— I understand. I really do. Please do not think you have to answer, or even give a response, I’d like for you to just listen for a little bit. It’s easier when you’re in this form for sure.”

Chat Noir chirps in her arms.

“I don’t want you to ever think that you make me uncomfortable, because that simply isn’t true. I understand that you want nothing to do with me in the same manner that I do with you— you will always be my familiar and my friend.” She feels giddy, being able to finally say it out loud. “My feelings for you are very strong. You’re my most valuable companion— and— and I— I thank Tikki every day for all the moments I can share with you.”

He butts her on her collarbone, nuzzling into her shoulder.

“The face you had made just moments before I’d left the house— your magic swelling up like a cloud, like it does now— I do not want that to ever happen again. You will never make me uncomfortable— and you never have. I value you so much. Too much. I care about you too deeply. I don’t need to cookies to know that I have feelings for you.”

Chat Noir stops moving.

And that says all.

She steels herself. “Do you think I’m playing a prank on you? Do you truly not believe me?”

He’s almost like stone in her arms.

“I— I would never do that to you. Please, don’t assume things like that. My words are pure.” She sighs to herself when his only response is to flick his tail. “Why don’t we go shopping for the bag of flower so I can make the cookies and prove to you my feelings?”

AO3 | Start Here | Previous Chapter | Next Chapter

[faraway-in-headspace]

I?? I searched Chicken Choice Judy on google out of curiosity because it sounds oddly familiar like there’s a similar-sounding name and I found 4 websites selling the shirt design. But the descriptions on these pages are BUCK WILD??

Written version of the descriptions under the cut (very long).

[Begin ID

First image states:  Long ago, when I had hair, I was an undergrad living in a house with nine other men. Near as I can tell, three of them (not sure which three) never bought food, just lived off what they stole from the Chicken Choice Judy shirt But I will love this other seven. We had several house meetings about it, but nothing changed. One day, I came in from grocery shopping. By coincidence, all 10 of us were in the kitchen. I started putting my stuff away. 1st thing I pulled out of the bag was my half-gallon of milk. I opened the carton, took a couple of drinks from the carton, then gargled some of it, and spit it back in. I opened my tub of margarine and licked the whole surface. By now, the room chatter had stopped because the other nine jaws had dropped open.) To your original question, those specific topics would take several years to build, as they depend on several layers of pre-requisites, which would require either that more advanced topics such as algebraic topology to be taught in elementary school, or that the buildup process happened blazingly fast during high school – both of which probably stretch the biological limits of what pre-teens and teenagers can reasonably be expected to accomplish. I spit on all my veggies, took the bread out of the package, and licked and spit on it, then carefully put it all back in the plastic bag. Remind teenage daughters to look through them before going on date with the boyfriend, in case they want to use one. I labeled it all and put it away. None of it was stolen. I never said a word, but I made it a point to repeat the performance anytime anyone was around to see it. Others began to emulate my approach and food theft stopped. Even I found it revolting, but it solved the problem. Works even better if you are sick or can at least make your thieving roommates think you are. While some cities are starting to reopen in the wake of the COVID-19 pandemic, people around the country are continuing to wear masks in public and practice social distancing. Vogue is committed to staying safe, and offering hopeful, optimistic content that highlights moments of camaraderie and exceptional acts of heroism from around the world. We are all looking for a little comfort too—be it a soothing Instagram account or a stylish creator on TikTok. It reminds us of the power of little things.

Second image states:  A couple of guests informed me my office was too minimalist and that they expected more things to be hanging on my wall the Chicken Choice Judy shirt besides I will buy this next time they visited my wife’s and my home. I kinda hope they held their breath while they were waiting for our next invitation. They both went on to backstab me and my wife pretty bad a few years later. Another set of guests tried to squat. I had driven them all the way from Florida to Massachusetts under the impression that they had jobs and a place to live lined up. They offered no money for gas, hotels on the three-day trip, or compensation for the inconvenience and effort. He even tried to weasel out of the dinner he offered as a thank you by forgetting his wallet. The dude got me off the streets years ago and I wanted to pay him back in some way, but my wife and I were in no position to have extra residents in our home. We just don’t have the room or money. I made all of this VERY clear and told my old buddy that we could only house them for a couple of days max. There are MANY other details, but the disrespectful thing my former friend said was wordless. As I was kicking them out and they were angrily loading stuff into my car to bring them anywhere but here, my buddy left his gigantic knife right in the center of my wife’s desk. Like that was supposed to make us change our minds and let them stay? In the days of dial-up, I had a family call and not be able to get through because we were online. They decided to show up unannounced. They literally caught me in my underwear as they were let into the apartment before I could even react to being rudely surprised. Some of my family members have a history of abuse, violence, and stalking, something at least one of the visitors, my mother, was quite aware of since she lived through it with me. Her tagalong friend decided to put in her two cents and tell me I should get a call waiting or a second line because they were trying to call me. That did it! I suddenly forgot I was just wearing underwear and angrily asked my mother’s friend if she was paying my phone bill. My mother-in-law, stepfather and mom’s friend beat a hasty retreat and NEVER did the pop-in ever again.

Third image states:  That was why when we did get to reality shows, Etro and then Dolce & Gabbana plus Jacquemus later in France, it was wonderful. Clothes are all about contact: As a wearer, you feel them on your skin, and as a watcher, you process them with your eye. The watching part can be done secondhand, but the Chicken Choice Judy shirt in contrast I will get this impact will always be second to the real thing. I read some commentators in the U.S. saying, “Too soon” or “Wear a damn mask!” which I always did, but these opinions while valid enough lack perspective. Milan and its surrounding region Lombardy went through what New York did but earlier. Through sagacious governmental management much more effective than that of the U.S., Italy has managed dramatically to flatten the curve across the rest of its territory. These shows just like the reopening of flights, stores, factories, and restaurants were symptomatic of recovery that, far from being taken for granted, is being tended to with vigilance and cherished with gratitude. The digital Fashion Weeks were better than no Fashion Weeks at all, but as an upgrade on the real thing? Nah. Like everyone, I missed the shows in the experiential sense this season. But for the first time since I began covering the collections several years ago, I didn’t miss a single brand or designer’s contribution to Paris Fashion Week. Which is to say, thanks to the Fédération’s online platform, I was able to watch every name on the haute couture and men’s calendars. This brand on-demand convenience not to mention being spared the logistical headaches of zigzagging across the city was pretty great. Also, everything was on time, from the films to the manner in which we filed our reviews. While efficiency can be satisfying, it’s not necessarily exciting. Ultimately, we had to accept that the focus this season wasn’t going to be the clothes but rather the brands conveying some combination of identity, process, and values. And in the absence of standardized criteria as in, showing a minimum number of looks, specifying a time range, it was interesting to observe how heterogeneous these experiments proved to be quasi–ad campaigns versus short films, conceptual or fantastical visions versus raw and documentary style. A proper kimono takes nearly an hour to put on – I’m sure most Japanese girls would much rather spend a few seconds and slip on a dress. Get survey responses from targeted consumers today.

Fourth image states:  Around a decade ago, not long after he started his own label, Massimo Alba made a great mistake. A batch of shirts and T-shirts he was working on that had already been garment-dyed one color were mistakenly exposed to another. Speaking at his showroom presentation this weekend, Alba said: “It’s very interesting to me that so many good things start out as mistakes like this.” That accident was to Alba what the Chicken Choice Judy shirt moreover I will buy this mold-infected petri dish was to Alexander Fleming: a stumbled-upon eureka that led to a career-defining course of the investigation. This collection featured a series of softly tailored jackets, corduroy pants, and shorts, plus light cashmere sweaters that were hand-overdyed two, and sometimes three colors. It’s a process that led to variations in tone that included acid-trip floods of purple on purple to subtle bleeding of magenta across mustard yellow. Like most of Alba’s garments, these dyed pieces appeared at first glance conventionally prosaic. The more attention you gave them, however, the more their exceptional qualities became evident. Take a pale blue jacket, for instance, which at that first glance seemed passingly related to a surgeon’s scrubs. To the hand it was light and almost textureless in its softness: The fabric was a cotton mousseline developed for Alba by Albini. Long-sleeved, in a delicately mottled finish of washed-out sky blue, it made for an ideal mid-summer shake in pink, sleeveless, it was an impactful shirting second skin. Other interesting developments this season included a cotton pant named the Myles with acutely kinking stitched gather at knee-level on both legs and another handsome pant, baggy in white poplin, with patch pockets. A blue tropical weight jacket named the Lenny, after Bernstein, was Alba’s interpretation of a bohemian creative’s ideal piece of workwear. Collarless shirts in ripstop linen and button-up short-sleeves in terry were further finely effective coups de théâtre. Alba is a self-deprecating yet dangerous designer: Try just one carefully chosen piece and that’s it, you’re spoiled for good because nobody else quite compares. The museum in Prague where this portrait is held describes the ring on her first finger as the ring given to her at her wedding. It’s not comfortable. Maybe a lot of girls think that a see-through blouse can attract the attention of boys or they think that it will make her look much smarter. Meghan has no dress sense: no knowledge of fabrics, fit, styles that flatter, proper tailoring, Her father raised her in L.A. Enough said. Her idea of dressing for an event is “dress up” like a little girl dressing up as a princess. Shiny! Tight! Celebrity “fashion” not elegant, just flashy.

/end ID]

[puppyexpressions]

Dog Bucket List: 45 Fun Things to Do With Your Dog to Make Him Happy

It’s not for nothing that our furry friends are often referred to as human’s best friend. They’re incredibly loyal, caring and earnest, and their love is unconditional like no other. Thus, it’s only fair we also treat our doggies like they’re our best friends; it’s a spot they’ve rightfully earned, after all. And that means there’s so much more we could be doing together with our dogs to make them (and you) happy beyond the basics. That’s why I have put together this fun bucket list of things to do with your dog, so that you and your furry best friend can get into some awesome dog-friendly activities together!

1. ✧ Stay at a Pet-Friendly Hotel

There are plenty of places where your pooch is welcome to stay, just do a simple search for pet-friendly accommodations. You will find hotels and log cabins, as well as a cottages and cute glamping tents. Pick one and have a memorable getaway with your pup.

2. ✧ Learn a New Trick

Depending on how long you’ve been training him, your pup likely already knows how to play fetch and roll over. Those are just the most basic of tricks that you could teach him though. There is also the army crawl, the salute, and the handstand which can leave other owners impressed once your doggy has mastered them.

3. ✧ Dress Up for Halloween

Halloween can be a fun holiday to enjoy together with your pup. The stores are bursting with simple costumes for dogs, like different kinds of cute headbands that’ll easily transform them into a dog-dragon or the like for the night. A quick search for dog costumes on Amazon will pop up a ton of different options as your dog’s costume, such as reindeer ridden by Santa, mail carrier, ghostbuster, dinosaurs, Maleficent, and the list goes on.

And naturally, it is a must to take a million photos of you and your pup in your Halloween outfits for the world to see.

4. ✧ Walk on the Beach

With the summer season well under way, there’s no excuse not to schedule a fun day out frolicking on the sand. There are plenty of dog-friendly beaches around the US that you could visit.

5. ✧ Have a Doggy Birthday Party

You should be able to lookup your pooch’s birthday on his pedigree. But, if your dog is a rescue or doesn’t have an exact birthdate, you can pick a date that’s convenient to you, so he can check off this activity on his dog bucket list. It would be wise to send out your invitations and make the cake early so you won’t end up going crazy over last-minute arrangements.

Don’t forget to buy a cute birthday hat and you can easily bake your own doggie cake with the Wheat-Free Peanut Butter Puppy Cake Mix.

6. ✧ Take Your Dog to Work With You

While not all workplaces allow it, for security, hygiene and other reasons, surprisingly many companies these days allow for their employees to bring their dog to work with them. And why not? A furry friend in the office makes the working day so much more fun and breezy!

Your dog will also enjoy the extra time spent with you, not to mention all the attention they’ll be getting throughout the day from your colleagues who won’t be able to keep their hands off from petting your doggy.

7. ✧ Ride in a Convertible

Just like you, your pup loves to feel the wind in his hair when cruising down the highways. The usual coupe or pickup is boring and confining though, so go on a drive in a convertible instead. Accessorize with cool sunglasses (like the QUMY dog goggles) as you bask in the sun and you will feel like celebrities who have all the time in the world.

8. ✧ Go Shopping Together at a Dog-friendly Store

Shopping no longer has to be an activity that you love to do but need to leave your furry bestie home for! Although certain stores, such as supermarkets, continue to be quite inaccessible to dogs, a wider range of stores accepting dogs, outside of pet shops, are beginning to arise all over. Just check online before you get going on your epic shopping trip!

9. ✧ Stand Up Paddle Board

If you haven’t already noticed, a stand-up paddle board just happens to fit more than one person, you can easily have room for a smaller sized dog. Honestly, teaching your pet to SUP may be one of the more challenging things to do on this list, but in the end it’ll be so much fun to paddle down a scenic river or on a smooth lake.

10. ✧ Do a Police Car Ride Along

Another one for extra special dog activities–for both you and the dog–is to go on a ride along in a police car. It can’t get much more exciting than that! It’s also totally safe to do, giving you a ton of first hand insight on what it’s actually like to be a police officer for a day.

11. ✧ Play Frisbee

If your dog already knows how to fetch a stick or a ball, it can be easy to advance a level with a Frisbee. Though Fido might have some difficulty with catching a flying disc at first, this is one thing to do with your dog that will require a little patience.

You can easily find a frisbee on Amazon, but the KONG Classic Flyer is one of the best-rated across the board.

12. ✧ Sleep on the Bed

Sleeping on the bed can be such a treat for your pooch, but don’t give into the temptation too much or they won’t sleep in their own dog bed! Some dogs will even chew up their beds so that they can spend more time on your bed—a very smart trick. Everybody knows that having your pooch lie in your bed with you is one of the best feelings in the world for you (and him), but once they start snoring, it might be time to kick them out of the bedroom!

13. ✧ Watch the Puppy Bowl

As tempting as it might be to switch the channel to watch your favorite American football teams going at each other, Super Bowl Sunday is the best time for you to binge-watch the Puppy Bowl with your pooch. Not only will you see puppies, but also other cute animal “tweeters” and “commentators”. You never know, you might find that squealing at fluffy furballs is a more enjoyable annual thing to do than screaming at sweaty athletes.

14. ✧ Have Breakfast in Bed

Is it your pup’s birthday? Or perhaps just a rainy and gloomy morning where you could both use a little pick me up? Having breakfast in bed together, all the while cuddling and maybe catching something comforting on the TV, sounds like a great way to treat yourself – and your pupper!

If you’re skilled with your hands and in the kitchen, try to whip up a breakfast that looks like you’re both having the same thing, but will be totally safe for your furry friend to eat. Some ideas for a dog friendly breakfast are cauliflower muffin bites, pancake puffs or these mini omelettes. Perhaps you’d like to enjoy the same treats for your breakfast – or at least the human version of them?

15. ✧ Take a Nap Together

Although a simple activity, apart from a good and long walk around the neighborhood, this is what you and your pup will love to do together the most! If possible, why not make it a regular thing even? It’s such an excellent way for both of you to recharge your batteries mid-day. So cuddle up and get to snoozing!

16. ✧ Visit a Nursing Home

There’s no denying the fact that playing with dogs can be therapeutic, especially to those who live in nursing homes. This is because friendly canines can encourage residents to leave the confines of their room and to recover faster from surgery or a stroke. Watching the older generation having fun with your pet is always worth the effort of driving to your nearest care home and it will be such a rewarding thing to do for everyone.

17. ✧ Eat a Gourmet Meal

I have eaten many incredible meals at memorable restaurants in my lifetime, but finding a restaurant that serves gourmet meals for dogs can be a challenge. Sometimes, it would be better off to prepare the food yourself, which should be fairly easy to do. There are several delicious dog friendly recipes on the web that can be easy to make, like peanut butter cookies, gourmet whole wheat dog biscuits and chicken jerky. 

18. ✧ Have a Steak Dinner

If breakfast in bed sounds like it could get messy or complicated really quick, you can’t go wrong with a steak dinner. And since your dog actually can eat the same dish as you this time around—though they may prefer it on the raw side—it’s an especially fun ‘date night’ between you and your best friend. Your doggie doesn’t need much more than a juicy hunk of meat to feel special and loved, and you’ll love to share a good steak with them, too.

19. ✧ Get a Doggy Massage

You’re not the only one who can benefit from a trip to the spa every once in a while; your canine friend can too! Many owners believe that a doggy massage can help to provide strengthened immunity, increased circulation, stress relief and improved digestion in their pets. You may not be able to get him a Thai massage, but definitely something more gentle will be available for your deserving best friend. So, schedule an appointment with your nearest animal massage parlor today to give your pup a well-deserved break after a hard day at the park of learn how to massage your dog yourself.

20. ✧ Get a ‘Pawicure” (AKA: Doggie Manicure)

Unlike us humans, our dogs probably don’t appreciate getting their nails cut as much as we do. But if you make an event of it, you might survive through it with less hassle. Google around for shops in your local area where you can go get a pawicure at, or follow these instructions to pamper and groom your pup from the comfort of your home. And while you’re at it, don’t forget to treat yourself to a mani-pedi as well!

21. ✧ Play Hide n’ Seek

Well, a dog friendly version of hide n’ seek, at least! Your pup may not understand the rules of the original hide and seek, but if you play it in a way that your dog can enjoy and easily follow the rules, you’ll both end up having a great time.

In the dog friendly version, instead of ordering your dog to go hide, or hiding yourself, you’ll hide his or hers favorite toy. Start with easy hiding spots and, as your pet gets the gist, you can increase the difficulty of where you hide the toy.

22. ✧ Play in the Leaves

Cleaning up your yard from the fallen leaves just got a whole lot more fun with the pup joining in on the game. You might not get a lot of actual work done, but you’ll get plenty of laughter out of it! And if you don’t have a yard, find a park or equivalent where there’ll be leaves to play around in.

23. ✧ Play Sock Tug-of-War

Got a pair of socks to spare? Tug-of-War is a fun game that you’ll be able to enjoy together, and you don’t even need to let your pup win! All you need are some socks that have seen their best days. You can play either with one simple sock, or you can use your socks to build a homemade version of a tug toy. If you don’t have some old socks, get him a squeaky sock monkey instead.

24. ✧ Be the Star in a Dog Calendar

Lots of organizations make calendars where owners can proudly display their pooches. The requirements for getting your pet in on the action can vary from place to place. Some clubs make it a contest to find suitable cover dogs while others are willing to print submissions. With companies like Shutterfly it’s also possible to create your own calendar with your favorite photos.

25. ✧ Swim in the Ocean

If Rover doesn’t already know how to swim, now is the best time for you to teach him. To make the training process easier and safer, make the necessary preparations such as providing clean water to drink, bringing a flotation vest, and establishing rest areas with a lot of shade. Start in a shallow part of the water then just coax him in farther with a toy or a treat. Using a positive tone of voice and giving lots of verbal praise can go a long way too. The Teaching Your Dog to Swim video with help you out!

26. ✧ Warm Up in Front of the Fire

This is an ultimate way for a human to cozy up on a cold evening, especially after a few hours spent outdoors getting your cheeks red in chilly weather. But you can count on your pooch to enjoy it every bit as much as you; the heat of the burning flames will warm him up, too, and it’s a great moment to spend together with you. Lay a towel, mat or a blanket on the floor, sit down and instruct your pup to come sit next to you, then wrap another blanket around the both of you, and enjoy some relaxing time together. 

27. ✧ Play in the Sprinklers

Owning a lawn can do more than just boost the curb appeal of your home. It also gives you plenty of opportunities to frolic with the furballs, particularly when you have a sprinkler system installed. Take note though that some doggies find it more interesting to chew, bite or dig your sprinklers so you might want to buy a few sprinkler toys,  like an inflatable shallow pool sprinkler or the crazy Tidal Storm Hydro spinning sprinkler that will have him entertained for hours!

28. ✧ Play With Your Favorite Toy Together

Every pup has a toy that they love and adore more than any other. It may be one that the doggy can enjoy playing with by herself, but it’s also one of the easiest things to do with your dog – and she’ll totally love having a buddy to pay with!

29. ✧ Have a Doggie Play Date

If you’ve noticed that your pup seems to want playmates of his own species, you can find him one by setting up play dates with other people’s pooches. This shouldn’t be a problem when you know a few pet owners in your area, but if you don’t you can search for one in dog parks or at doggy daycares. Should you decide to meet outside of those places, do it in neutral territory as you don’t want to end up having to break up any fights.

30. ✧ March in a Parade

Did you know that, especially around the holidays, there are dog parades arranged all around the country? How much fun does that sound like?! Your pup will get to don a costume and you’ll have a blast walking in the crowds, making new friends, both human and the four-legged kind. As parades are quite hectic, you may want to do some preparing and training with the pupper to get ready for the big day and have it go over smoothly and successfully.

31. ✧ Romp Around in the Snow

Although the winter time may feel cold and uncomfortable for going out for walks, there’s plenty of fun that can be had when there’s some snow on the ground. You’ll likely get to take the lead, but your pup will have the best time romping and jumping around in the snow with you, especially if you live in a region where you regularly get loads of it.

32. ✧ Hike a National Park

Generally, pets are permitted in National Parks (check each ones website to be sure!) but they typically have to be restrained on a leash not exceeding 6 feet in length. There are several reasons behind this NPS policy but the main point is to protect your dog along with park resources. To avoid any mishaps, remember to maintain proper trail etiquette including observing the rules for the right-of-way.

33. ✧ Have a Social Media Fanpage

You’ve probably heard of Boo the Pomeranian who has over 17 million fans on Facebook. Just like him, your pooch can become a social media superstar too! Start by taking lots of fun photos of your furry pal and post them on Twitter, Pinterest or Instagram. Or possibly even start a travel blog for your dog, but make sure you don’t make the beginning blogging mistakes I did! Take note to update the page on a regular basis and if there’s a high cuteness factor you should see the list of followers grow.

34. ✧ Take a Picture with Santa

A bit of a controversial opinion to some, but as a dog owner, at least one reading through this list, you definitely think of them as part of your family. Specifically, as one of the youngsters in the household. And therefore, getting a picture of the pup with Santa becomes a memory you’ll want to have and to keep!

35. ✧ Attend the Westminster Kennel Club Dog Show

There is no better way to show off your amazing canine friend than by having him join this prestigious dog show. Apparently, cuteness alone won’t cut it in the big leagues though so you have to focus on improving other aspects such as cosmetic features and structure. This gives you all the more reason to drop by the animal spa every now and then, doesn’t it?

36. ✧ Try Something New Together

New ways to spend time together with our puppies keeps being thought of, so there will be plenty for you to choose from and try out to find the activities you and your dog will enjoy. Have you ever gone roller blading together? Or tried out dog yoga? Search Google a bit for some suggestions, possibly even list down all the best sounding ideas, and get started on trying out those new things to do with your dog!

37. ✧ Go on a Picnic

Some days you just want to relax rather than chase after Fido. The problem is that it’s highly unlikely that your pet will want to stay still for a long period of time. A picnic is the best way for you to meet in the middle. As he romps around in the grass, you can chow on some cake and roll on the blanket.

38. ✧ Dine on the Patio of a Dog Friendly Restaurant

When the weather gets great, you’ll want to meet with your friends for some great brunch or dinner on a gorgeous patio of one of your favorite restaurants. What about, if the restaurant is also a dog friendly spot, you took your pup with you the next time? It’ll be a fun experience and memory for both of you to have, and if it goes well you might want to even make it a regular thing, perhaps with just the two of you.  

39. ✧ Go Camping

Want to embark on a camping adventure in the wild but don’t want to leave Spot behind? No problem-just bring him along! That is, if he is trained well enough to handle the activity. If he barks a lot or tends to snatch food from other people, you will want to rethink your camping plans.

The How to Camp With Your Dog article will help to get you wilderness ready, and the check out these pet friendly campgrounds around the world.

40. ✧ Be an Extra in a Movie

Whether it’s just your pretty pup, or the both of you together, it’s surprisingly easy to find a spot for an extra in a movie (or a TV show). It’s also rather easy and simple thing to do, so there’s no need to worry about how to be an extra in a movie or that it’d be too much for the pup to handle. Instead, it could be quite fun and will serve as a unique opportunity and activity – and not just to you but to the doggy as well!

41. ✧ Go to a Dog Park

It can be a whole lot of fun to get your furry friend to socialize with other pets at a dog park. However, you need to have established a calm-assertive leadership over him by then. With this, along with remaining vigilant, you can rest assured that your dog will not become a fight magnet. For an extra addition to you dog park bucket list visit these 10 Amazing Dog Parks You Need to See in Your Lifetime.

42. ✧ Take a Boat Ride

Now that you’re done swimming in the ocean, you’ll want to drop by a lake too for a ride on a boat. But you have to realize that not all dogs may enjoy the experience. What you need to do is get him acclimated to the boat before the trip to minimize his distress about not having his feet planted on solid ground.

43. ✧ Take Obedience Classes

Even if your pup isn’t quite as bad as Marley from Marley & Me, no harm will come from taking some obedience classes. In fact, it may teach you things about your dog on a new level. And, additionally, it will also be of aid in committing to the other dog activities on this bucket list, with the pup as obedient and polished as can be.

44. ✧ Do Doga (Dog Yoga)

Now that you’ve ticked massages off the dog bucket list, you should also give doga a go. Though you may not be able to find a doggy yoga retreat and hot Bikram yoga is out of the question, doga is not limited to just doing a variety of poses together. It may also include eye-gazing to enhance the human-canine bond. Overall, it’s an experience that can help both of you to relax.

45. ✧ Eat a Doggy Ice Cream

OK, maybe you won’t want to switch to eating doggy ice cream yourself and instead stick to your regular flavors of Ben & Jerry’s. But thanks to the great creation of doggy ice cream, your beloved pup can now join in on enjoying the icy treat together with you. You can find sometimes find doggy ice cream at the freezer section of the supermarket, or you might want to try your own hand at making some?

These fun dog activities should definitely keep you busy and active with some of the best things to do with your dog. Try them out to see what makes him or her happiest, then you can keep repeating and rotating between the best ones! Most of all, have a blast going through this bucket list together with your best friend!

[altarflame]

I planted things for the first time at this new house today, which feels significant. Chunks of my favorite variety of grocery store heirloom tomato (the orange ones), and a coupe of cuttings I've had in water for a long time. Maybe we really live here now. I've had that feeling a few times ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ It's incremental. Pros and Cons of This House Pros -Kitchen is SO MUCH MORE FUNCTIONAL than our last kitchen - bigger, non-leaking fridge; oven that never shuts itself off mid-use; DISHWASHER; sink that isn't in a stupid place -Sterling's and my bedroom has it's own good sized screened porch, off some sliding glass doors, which is pretty rad -Grant gets a huge space with it's own door to the outside and a sizeable patio slab -Ananda has secured what was originally intended as the master bedroom (since it's too small for any of the parent belongings to fit into), and thus has her own bathroom, which I'd say is appropriate since she's the one (20 year old) "kid" who pays rent -Aaron, who is poised as ever to move away again the moment it's safe, has upgraded from living in a cupboard under some stairs, to having a small and weirdly located but normal height room, with a big bay window he's filled with my succulents and glass -the living room has great vibes, working fireplace, exposed brick wall, a bar we're turning into a whole crazy drink station with all our tea things and an electric kettle and the sink there, it's exciting. -Isaac is pleased to have shifted from a leaky garage half crammed with camping storage, to a normal bedroom-there is a huge backyard filled with large trees and many squirrels AND there are chickens next door and they COME OVER AND SAY HELLO ALL FAT AND CHICKENY! -much cheaper than most places we looked at, and especially for being in a relatively convenient area that's literally 5 minutes from my office and 8 minutes from Sterling's job Cons -the room Jake and Elise are in is really kinda too small for both of them, and she is extremely tired of that. We're counteracting this by setting up a big hideout in the backyard for her that nobody else is allowed in for when she wants to be alone. -EVERYONE EXCEPT ANANDA IS SHARING ONE SMALL BATHROOM WTF IS LIIIIIIIIIIFE... it's also across the house from me? Grotesque. -Almost everywhere is painted a truly terrible faintly orange/brown beige, and when I say everywhere, I mean like, the door frames and accordian doors too with no contrasting trim. It's horrifying and we're doing all we can to counteract it covering walls in art and tapestries and painting a couple of bedrooms very different, but it's also a rental, and we're all tired of logistical tasks. -Elise's (specialized, tiny, non-transferrable, also actually COVID safe to a deeply impressive degree) school is now a 55 minute roundtrip. No matter how we break this up among the 4 licensed drivers in the household, it super sucks.

[canchewread]

Author’s note: well, my week has sucked, how about yours? 

Right, no rest for the wicked then. So as I mentioned at the tail end of last month, I’m working on a new kind of Recommended Reading blog feature here on Can’t You Read. 

The tl;dr is these posts are designed to combine a sharable info graphic (or meme, if you must) with some short burst analysis and an important link to a related and often overlooked story by someone else. Ideally, all of this fits into an 800 or 1,000 word package that actually gives you enough time in your undoubtedly busy day to read the article I’m linking to.

Got it? Good, let’s get cracking.

American Fascism and Networks of Power

Well my friends, the last nauseating funeral gasp of the Trump era is almost over. With the recent news that (soon-to-be) former swine emperor Trump’s own Department of Justice can find no evidence of widespread election fraud, we all appear to be getting collectively closer to the final resolution of the Klepto Kaiser’s “chicken coup” and perhaps, the waning of his political influence even on the reactionary right. 

Good riddance to bad rubbish I suppose, but as I’ve repeatedly tried to explain to virtually anyone who would listen, the end of Trump is most certainly not the end of fascism in the larger Pig Empire, or even just American fascism. The reasons for this are of course myriad but a short list might look something like this:

the pre-existing and increasingly normalized strain of ideological white nationalism in our society and ingrained into non-elected portions of the state (think police, ICE, and Trump’s complete transformation of the American judiciary; similar processes are also occurring in places like India, and Brazil of course.)

A weakened incoming, center-right administration (and its “liberal” establishment lackeys) that not only lacks the courage to purge fascists from public service but also attempts to weaponize far right violence against the American left, and regards antifascist street action as being akin to terrorism or crime.

the indefinite survival of an objectively fascist opposition party that probably has a better than even chance of retaining control of the U.S. Senate.

the existence of multiple right wing, mainstream media outlets and personalities that propagate fascist ideology, which are in turn buttressed by a seemingly endless wave of Astroturfed online media and internet psyops funded and controlled by fascist, or at least hyper-capitalist to the point of being reactionary, billionaires and their lobby networks.

the continued existence of violent, reactionary street gangs, far right neo-fascist militias, fascist conspiracy cults, and of course, roughly seventy-four million people who just gleefully voted for an open fascist and in some cases, continue to agitate for what would effectively be a coup.

the need for elite capital to defend itself against social upheaval and acquire soon-to-be scare resources in the face of evidence that capitalism is simply not compatible with avoiding the impending climate apocalypse our current political and economic course is actively ensuring will come to pass.

Naturally, I could have also mentioned the ongoing political, social and economic fallout from the still-raging coronavirus crisis, but I saved that for last because I want to unpack the ways we know many of the above forces function together in action - and as luck would have it, the Covid-19 anti-lockdown protests provide an extremely clear and documented example of what might otherwise look a little bit like a conspiracy theory. 

Now as you may well be aware, a concerted and sustained disinformation campaign conducted by not only President Trump, but the larger Republican Party and right wing media has successfully weaponized the response to the coronavirus as a culture war issue in America; and that conflict is rapidly spreading across the entire Pig Empire. 

This in turn was combined with a purely Astroturf protest movement, and judicious application of billionaire reactionary funding to literal white nationalist and fascist militias, to churn out thousands of cultists, chuds and other members of the reactionary “Volk” who demanded the economy be “re-opened” no matter how many elderly, marginalized or otherwise compromised people it might kill. Which as we’ve learned the month’s since, is quite a lot.

While each of these groups would vehemently deny it, it’s quite obvious that the billionaires and their media, are working with reactionary politicians in the Republican Party to marshal an aggressive, potentially violent protest movement against their political enemies and policies that threaten their profits. The rich guys get to keep raking in the cash, the politicians (who work for the rich guys anyway) get power and support from the chuds, and the Volk get to disguise a backlash against equality, decolonization and social advances as a battle against tyranny. All of which is wrapped up in a neat little bow under the auspices of covert white supremacy, in a situation that looks a little bit like eugenics, and bears all the hallmarks of historically racist (and obviously, false) attitudes in America about the genetic and more importantly *hygienic* superiority of whites over non-whites.    

Of course and as I mentioned above, all of this might sound like a conspiracy theory, but if you’ve been clicking on the links as we go along you know that it’s all true; unfortunately, a bipartisan billionaire-owned media interest in protecting the power and influence of elite capital in the Pig Empire, by and large prevents the mainstream media from presenting all of this information in its proper context. To counter that problem, let’s turn to investigative journalist Alex Kotch, an anti-corruption muckraker of considerable ability and someone who exists at least partially (but not entirely) outside the corporate media sphere.

On October 21st, 2020, Kotch and the Center for Media and Democracy published an extraordinary story that laid bare the inner workings of American fascism (and its capitalist roots) - we’re talking about exposing the direct financial connections between billionaire propaganda networks, fascist chud militias, right wing think tanks, GOP politicians and Astroturfed anti-lockdown protests; dark money meets dirty deeds done dirt cheap in a fake uprising that ends in obstructive lawsuits, partisan impeachment recommendations and a plot to kidnap and maybe even execute the governor of Michigan for... saving lives, apparently.

This is what the fascist alliance of elite capital (DeVos Family, Koch Network,) political power and street violence looks like in direct application; this is why I’m certain American fascism will outlast Trump’s fall - it’s all there in black and white. 

Unfortunately, hardly anyone noticed it at the time because the election consumed all of the oxygen in the room; as anything involving Trump is want to do. Let’s not make that mistake again - to check out Kotch’s incredible story, click on the title header below:  

GOP Politicians and Conservative Groups Set the Stage for Attempted Kidnapping of Michigan Governor by Alex Kotch

-nina illingworth

Independent writer, critic and analyst with a left focus. Please help me fight corporate censorship by sharing my articles with your friends online!

You can find my work at ninaillingworth.com, Can’t You Read, Media Madness and my Patreon Blog

Updates available on Twitter, Instagram, Mastodon and Facebook. Podcast at “No Fugazi” on Soundcloud.

Inquiries and requests to speak to the manager @ASNinaWrites

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“It’s ok Willie; swing heil, swing heil…”

[luci-in-trenchcoats]

The Farmhouse

Summary: The reader has been quietly dating the Ackles for close to two years now. When a bad day gets even worse, she questions what she’s doing running around with a married couple when she can’t even say who she’s dating…

Pairing: Jensen x reader x Danneel

Word Count: 5,500ish

Warnings: language, angst, eventual fluff

You were fuming by the time you finally, finally got home. Your car got a flat tire on the highway, about ten minutes from the brewery and you’d figured the roadside assistance guy would be there in twenty minutes tops. An hour later he called to say he was going to be another hour. You’d tried to call anyone left at the brewery but there was no answer, not that you were expecting anyone to be there after the brew had finished.

Jensen was flying back into town today, Danneel wasn’t answering your calls and your phone had to go and die on you. Eventually the road guy got there, only to tell you he didn’t have a spare in that size. You were pretty sure you growled as he called for backup, another guy arriving half an hour later. Finally, you were back on the road, pulling into the driveway close to eight.

“Where were you?” said Danneel when you stepped inside, wearing a nice dress, Jensen in a dress shirt and jeans. “You know Jay and I were having a date night.”

“Well excuse me,” you snapped, Jensen pouting at you.

“Hey, it’s been like a month since just De and I went out,” he said.

“Just go on your date,” you grumbled, walking past them for the bedroom.

“What’s got you in such a bad mood?” said Danneel back, a little too sharply for your taste.

“Answer your freaking phone next time,” you said, Danneel frowning at you.

“Girls,” said Jensen, holding up his hands. “Just take a breather. Y/N, there’s no need to come in with an attitude.”

“Go on your date,” you snapped, narrowing your eyes.

“Well the kids are over the Padalecki’s since you weren’t home,” she said. You kept on walking for the bathroom, slamming the bedroom door shut after you. “You’re such a child sometimes, Y/N!”

“Don’t talk to me anymore!” you shouted back, locking the door after you. You heard the front door shut after a moment and the car pull out.

You hopped in the shower to try to cool off but your anger only turned to being upset.

Neither one of them brought up the fact that you weren’t home. You could have been dead in a ditch and they hadn’t as so much bothered to ask why you were so late. They were just upset they were late for their date because you weren’t home to babysit.

Again.

They were the one’s that were married after all. They were the one’s that’d been together for years and years and years, the ones that had kids together.

You’d met them helping them set up the brewery and that’s how you got involved. Two years later though and you’d never even been on a real date with the two of them. No, out in public you were the third wheel, a super close friend. If you and Danneel went out, you were friends grabbing a bite. There was no holding hands ever, no kisses. Nothing beyond fast hugs which even then were mostly reserved for the two of them.

You understood, you really did. This was not a normal situation and you didn’t want them to get any crap for it.

But they got to actually show that they were in love and talk about each other openly and you were just there in the shadows.

The babysitter for date night. The one that’d never once gone out with Jensen just the two of you. The one that was treated almost like you were a nanny when other people were around.

Their parents didn’t even know. They didn’t even know you lived with them.

What the hell were you doing dating two people that would never love you the way you wanted to be? Maybe it was selfish but you just wanted so badly not to be the one that was brushed off or forgotten or hidden away for once.

It would always be that way too.

You got out of the shower and dried off, changing into jeans and a shirt, going to the closet and grabbing your suitcases and a duffel from the bottom. You slid all of your bathroom stuff into one, your clothes fitting in the rest. Everything else was theirs. Nothing in the house even really belonged to you. It was all the Ackles’.

You’d never be one of them, even if you’d fallen for them both.

You packed up your car and wrote a fast note, saying you were leaving and asking them not to contact you.

Ten minutes later you were on the highway, determined to get the hell out of Austin.

You pulled into the driveway about 2am, after driving aimlessly for a few hours, ignoring the phone calls and texts you kept getting alerted to. You left all but one of your bags in your car, knocking on the door quietly.

“Y/N?” yawned Nate as he pulled open the front door. “Sis, what-”

“Can I crash here tonight?” you asked. He nodded and let you inside, stumbling back up the stairs with you on his heels.

“Uh, there might be some boxes and crap in your old room,” he said.

“That’s okay. Thanks for letting me stay,” you said.

“This used to be your house too,” he said. “We’ll talk in the morning.”

You woke up groggy, Nate already up and about from the sounds of it. You padded downstairs, Nate sliding a dish of bacon and eggs in front of you.

“Mmm, thanks,” you said, grabbing a fork from the drawer and diving in.

“So...what brings my kid sister all the way up to the old family farm in the middle of the night?” he said with a smirk, taking a seat across from you.

“I quit my job,” you said, shoveling some food in your mouth. “I’m done with Austin. I was thinking of working the farm. You could use the help and I could split bills with you.”

“That does sound appealing but why’s smartie pants who couldn’t wait to get out of here want to suddenly come back?” he asked. “You were making good money at that brewery place.”

“Issue with the owners,” you said, chewing on some bacon.

“Big brother gotta kick some ass kind of issue?” he asked.

“No, Nathan,” you said with a smirk. “I don’t want to work there or be around them anymore is all.”

“So you quit your job and are moving because you don’t want to work with your boyfriend and girlfriend anymore...the whole coming here in the middle of the night thing is making a bit more sense now,” he said.

“You always thought I was a freak for dating two people at once anyways. What’s it matter to you?” you said.

“I was surprised when you told me, yes, but I never thought you were a freak. Everything you ever told me about them...you always lit up. You were in love. Of course I want you to be happy, whoever it’s with,” he said. “Hey, I knew you were into boys and girls before you did. I’m the one that helped you talk to mom and dad about it you were so scared.”

“Nate,” you said, squeezing your eyes shut. “I just wasted two years of my life on people that will never be able to love me the way they love each other. The worst part is I still love them. I feel like a little kid throwing a tantrum.”

“I don’t think the fact that you want to have an open relationship with your partners is a crime, Y/N. I think you should be a little selfish when it comes to love. Mom and dad showed us what a good relationship is. Your partners aren’t taking care of you like they should be,” he said.

“Sometimes I would get scared that I’m just...something fun to them. Something new and exciting. They asked me to never tell anyone about them. Anyone, Nate,” you said.

“I know. So do mom and dad,” he said with a smirk.

“Because I didn’t want to hide that from you guys. But they hide me and-”

“I know your relationship is different than what people are used to but there’s a difference between not broadcasting something to the world and hiding it,” he said. “And you know what one was going on here.”

“Mom and dad never even met them. You never even met them,” you said.

“Well, mom and dad are in Florida and you’ve never even been invited to these guys Christmas and you know what? Fuck those guys. This relationship has too many conditions on it and that’s not what you want,” said Nate. “You can crash here and help out around the farm for a while but I do think you should try to get back into brewery work, maybe something around here.”

“Thanks, Nate.���

Two Days Later

You were setting down a fresh bag of feed in the chicken coup when you heard a car door open and shut out front. About ten seconds later a body walked around the farmhouse, stilling as he spotted you. He walked over quickly, slowing as he came to a stop a few feet away.

“You shouldn’t have come to your brother’s if you didn’t want to be found,” said Jensen.

“Surprised you remember I have a brother. You better get out of here before another human being sees you talking to me alone,” you said, cutting open the bag and filling up the trench for the chickens.

“What the hell is this?” said Jensen, pulling out the note you’d left. “You don’t call or answer any of our messages. What the hell is going on?”

“Excuse me,” said Nate, patting his gloves together, heading over from the other end of the barn. “I believe you’re on private property mister.”

“You must be Nate,” said Jensen.

“You must be the dick,” said Nate. Jensen’s face flashed with hurt for a moment, his gaze back on you. “I think you should go.”

“Not until I know what happened,” said Jensen. “Sweetie-”

“She ain’t your sweetie anymore, princess,” said Nate, stepping in front of Jensen, letting the few inches and pounds he had on him show off. Jensen scowled up at him but Nate shoved Jensen’s arm. “Leave before I call the cops.”

“I just-”

Nate shoved on Jensen again, Jensen glaring at Nate but all you saw was the sad look in his eyes.

“Y/N. What-”

Nate grabbed Jensen’s arm and yanked him forward, Jensen shrugging out of it.

“What is your fucking problem?” snapped Jensen.

“Oh, I’m sorry. I’m only treating you the way you treat her. Unwanted and there as a convenience, something pretty to look at it. Why don’t you get your pretty boy Hollywood ass out of here before I knock some sense into you,” said Nate.

“What the fuck are you talking about!” said Jensen. Nate laughed and you went wide eyed, remembering him doing that when he was a teenager about to get in a fight. About two seconds later, Jensen was a few feet back, his hand on his cheek. “Did you punch me?”

“Must not have took,” said Nate, raising up his fist and swinging again, Jensen dodging most of it this time. Nathan kicked out his feet though and Jensen fell flat on his back, Nathan glaring down at him.

“Nathan!” you shouted, shoving him away. “What the fuck are you doing! You’re an adult. Act like one.”

“I politely asked this mister to get off my property and when he declined, I exercised my right-”

“Go away. Now,” you barked. Nate stared at you a moment before he headed back for the barn. Jensen got up to his feet, brushing himself off. “Are you-”

“Do we make you feel unwanted?” he asked quietly.

“My brother starts to kick your ass and that’s what you focus on?” you asked.

“Do you?” he asked. You sighed and grabbed his arm, leading him up to the farmhouse and into the kitchen. You sat him down at the table, finding a first aid kit and cleaning up his cheek while he watched you. “Why’d you break up with us? Was it your fight with De? She’s a wreck. I mean, we sent the kids to my parents and she’s been out to your friends in Austin. We were both trying to look for you and-”

“I don’t fit with the two of you,” you said. He nodded and you turned away to get a small bandage, Jensen hard faced when you turned back but you saw his eyes were wet and verging on tears. “Don’t cry.”

“Why don’t you get your brother to hit me again then,” he said, swallowing thickly.

“I did not ask him to do that,” you said. Jensen bit his bottom lip and stood up, out your back door and marching towards the barn before you could stop him. “Jensen!”

“Nate!” shouted Jensen. “Your sister ain’t talking so maybe you will.”

“Jensen!” you shouted, jogging over as Nate was on Jensen like that, grabbing his shirt collar. “Nate, do not-”

“Do you love my sister?” asked Nate.

“Yes,” said Jensen.

“Love her as much as your wife?” he asked.

“Yes,” said Jensen.

“Then why the fuck does she not know that? Why don’t you take her out on a date? Why don’t you treat her like a partner? I had a partner, asshole, and she got sick and I’d do anything to get her back. So what the fuck would you do to get her back? How far would you go to prove that to her?” said Nate.

“You really haven’t looked at your phone in two days, huh,” said Jensen, giving you a sad smile. You cocked your head and grabbed it from your back pocket. “When you were gone like that...De and I got a little scared and you weren’t technically missing so we made a post.”

You opened up instagram, jaw dropping when you saw the post they’d both put up. There was a picture of the three of you. The one with them both kissing you from New Year’s last year.

“This is Y/N. She’s our girlfriend and she’s missing,” you said, scanning over the rest of the post. “We miss her. Please come home.”

“We were never hiding you on purpose. We were only doing what you asked us at the start of all of this. Keep you out of the limelight. Keep it away from our families like you said. You’re the one that came up with the rules for dates out at first and we always thought you’d tell us if you were ready for more and...” said Jensen. “Honey-”

“That was two years ago. You never even told your family about me and you told me I wasn't supposed to tell anyone either. You aren’t innocent in this.”

“We never said this would be easy. I screwed up. De screwed up. We talked everything out at the start and never talked about it again. We should have kept talking about it, Y/N. Please, just give us another chance,” he said.

“Nate, hold on to him for a second,” you said. Jensen glanced back at Nate and then you, watching you type away on your phone for a moment. “You can let him go now.”

“What’d you do?” asked Jensen.

“I responded to your instagram post. I was your girlfriend as in ‘friend’ and that was all,” you said. Jensen shook his head and you made your face hard. “We’re done.”

“Y/N,” said Jensen, stepping towards you but Nate grabbed him. Jensen didn’t hold back this time and swung hard, Nate pushing it aside and pinning his arm behind his back. “Y/N.”

“Time for you to go, Romeo,” said Nate, Jensen trying to break out of the hold as Nate started to pull him back towards his car. “Stop. She said no.”

The fight went out of Jensen at that, Nate guiding him back to the car and sitting him down behind the wheel.

“Listen. I know you want to make things right but I know my little sister. She’s been too hurt by all this and whatever happened a few nights ago was the last straw. Something beyond a lack of date nights caused this. She always felt second class to you and your wife. Don’t get me wrong, I understand loving your wife but you two never made her feel like she was loved the same, even if you felt it,” said Nate.

“I’m not giving up,” said Jensen, Nate closing his car door on him. “Not ever.”

“She said she’s done,” said Nate. “Respect that.”

“I’m not leaving this town until she knows how much we love her,” said Jensen.

“You just don’t get it buddy, do you? I see you on my property again, I’m calling the cops,” said Nate.

“I’m not throwing away someone I love just because you threaten me. I got my own kid sister so I fucking get what you’re doing but you could beat the hell out of me every single day and it still ain’t going to stop me until she knows that we love her,” said Jensen.

“That can be arranged,” he said.

“Next time I’m back, my wife will be with me. If you even think-”

“I wouldn’t touch a lady. I’ll tell her off but won’t touch,” he said.

“Good,” said Jensen.

“Now get.”

“I know you’re going to ignore this but tell her I’ll be back tonight with De. We need to talk,” said Jensen, closing his eyes.

“No, you won’t,” he said.

“Yes, I will.”

“Boys,” you snapped, both of them turning to face in front of them. “Get out of the car and if anyone throws another fucking punch, somebody’s getting kicked in the nuts, got it?”

Nate held up his hands and moved away, giving Jensen enough space to slip out of his car.

“Nate. I don’t care where you go but give us some privacy,” you said. Nate grumbled but walked around the other side of the house, Jensen just staring at you. “I didn’t make a post.”

“Why-”

“I wanted to see your reaction,” you said. “To thinking you’d really lost me.”

“Why?” he asked.

“Because I needed to know if you really wanted to try again. I wasn’t expecting you to get dragged out of here by Nate,” you said.

“I will do whatever the fuck you want me to. De and I both will. Just don’t tell us we lost you,” he said.

“Have I ever been a game to the two of you? Just something fun to play with and spice things up?” you asked.

“No. Never,” he said softly.

“You love me?” you asked.

“Just as much as De. You’re both my girls,” he said, glancing down at his feet. “Do you love us?”

“Of course,” you said, Jensen lifting his head up.

“Friday when you were gone so long...you weren’t on a date?” he asked.

“What?” you asked.

“You know those little tile things with the gps we all stuck on our phones in case we lost them? When De got out of the dentist-”

“De was at the dentist?” you asked.

“Yeah. Her appointment got bumped back a few hours,” said Jensen, shaking his head. “When we saw all the missed calls, we looked up the gps since you weren’t answering your phone. It showed you were at that restaurant just off the highway by the brewery for like...hours. We thought maybe the calls were to break up and you were on a date with someone else. When you got home, we were too scared to bring it up and that’s why De was so on edge and...”

“I got a flat tire,” you said.

“I believe you,” he said.

“You thought I was going to break up with you?” you asked.

“Technically I think you still did,” he said. “We thought you were unhappy with us. Everything was so hush hush...we thought you were embarrassed of us.”

“Jensen-”

“You’re beautiful, Y/N. You could snag a guy, a girl, ten years younger than me easily. You could get married properly that way, have someone that was always home and not off in another country working...you can have better than us. We thought...”

“We all need to stop thinking and just start talking,” you said. “We just need to sit down and talk this through, alright?”

“I’ll call De. She’ll be here in a few hours.”

“Nathan,” you said, narrowing your eyes at your brother in the house, Jensen sitting awkwardly on the end of the couch. “Would it kill you to apologize to Jensen for hitting him?”

“What’d he do? Put on puppy dog eyes and suddenly the sun shines out his ass again?” asked Nate.

“We talked. De’s going to be here soon and we’ll talk some more and then I’m probably going to head home in the morning,” you said.

“She’s not a toy to play with you know,” growled Nate.

“Why do you hate me so much?” asked Jensen calmly. “I never asked to fall in love with two women at the same time. I kept it to myself, I felt like an awful person for even thinking it until my wife brought up Y/N one night and we realized we both felt the same about her. Maybe I can’t be what you envisioned for her but I will be kind and good and isn’t that what you want?”

“I want you to shut-”

A knock came at the door, Nate standing and stepping over to it, ripping it open fast.

“Hi,” said Danneel quietly.

“Oh great. Another one,” he said, rolling his eyes. He opened the door and Danneel slipped past him, pausing when she saw Jensen’s face and then you.

“What...” she said.

“De, this is Nate. He sort of fucking hates us so don’t take offense,” said Jensen. Danneel took two large steps away from Nate, your brother scoffing as he went past.

“Don’t worry. Punching is reserved for pretty boy,” said Nate.

“What is your problem?” you shot at him, Nate’s face scrunching up. “You’ve been terribly rude, violent, De’s scared to be near you. I know you aren’t happy with them and we got some stuff to work out but you’re going to respect my partners, dammit. Now apologize for the pretty boy crack or I’ll whoop your ass myself.”

“Whatever,” said Nate, quickly leaving the house, the sound of one of the machines going outside telling you at least you’d have some privacy.

“Sorry about...” you said. Danneel stared at you and quickly rushed over, wrapping her arms around you. “De. De, too tight.”

“I’m so sorry,” she mumbled, Jensen standing up and peeling her off of you.

“De, honey, relax. I already did the groveling part,” said Jensen. “Let’s sit down and figure out what went wrong and how we’re going to change all of those things in the future, alright?”

You were sandwiched between both of them on the couch, Jensen playing with your hair, Danneel making shapes on one of your arms. A bit of calm and quiet after all the talking had been nice. Things felt good again and the heavy weight you’d been carrying around with you was gone, hopefully for good.

Nate gave you a quick goodbye but didn’t say a word to either one of them when you headed out.

Back at home, you had a few days of just the three of you, of playing together without all the rules this time, of going out to dates. Jensen wasn’t overly affectionate in public in general but he liked to hold your hand now when you walked or give a quick peck on the lips. Date nights were always for everyone from then on out and Danneel said they’d get someone over to watch the kids since you were their mom too and more than entitled to a night off.

Once the kids were back home, you settled into a routine with everyone that left everyone feeling like they belonged again.

Two Months Later

“I’ll get it,” said Jensen, padding out of the kitchen and to the front door.

“I thought everyone we were expecting was here already,” said Danneel, counting off people in the living room again.

“Maybe we got a rebel who didn’t rsvp,” teased Jensen. You saw his smile drop when he pulled the door open, Danneel walking over with a big smile until hers too faded away.

“Hey,” said Nate by the time you got over there, in a pair of nice jeans and a button down, holding a small bag. “You uh, having that engagement party thing for Y/N tonight?”

“Yeah,” you said, stepping in front of them. “I thought you said you were busy.”

“Well, hopefully you only get sort of engaged and sort of married only once,” he said with a shrug. “Here.”

He held out the bag, the top of your favorite local brew back home sticking out.

“So you gonna let me see this fancy house or what? I just drove three hours after all,” he said.

“Nate,” you said.

“You look a lot happier than last time I saw you,” he said softly. “I’ll be on my best behavior. I promise.”

“We’re more than glad to have some of Y/N’s family here,” said Danneel, waving Nate in.

“She really is cute,” said Nate.

“She’s taken,” you and Jensen said, Nate chuckling.

“I guess you could have gotten an uglier mug for pretty boy over here, too,” he said.

“I still owe you one, farm boy,” said Jensen.

“Think you could take me shortie?” said Nate.

“I got the boxing gloves in the gym,” he said.

“I’ll have to take you up on that sometime,” said Nate.

“Boys,” you grumbled, rolling your eyes. “Nate, go meet the rest of the family and be nice, please?”

“Alright, alright. Like I said, best behavior,” he said. Danneel led him over to the kitchen, the room quiet for a moment before you heard the sound pick up again.

“Hey,” said Jensen, tugging you away to the bedroom, giving you a cautious smile. “You okay?”

“Yeah. Just wasn’t expecting Nate to show,” you said, shrugging as you looked at the floor. “I don’t know. I thought...things were weird between us once I went home with you guys. I think he thought you guys were manipulating me or something.”

“He loves his kid sister. I get that he wants you to be in a good relationship,” he said. “De and I may have lied about one thing to you since we’ve been back together but we did it for good reasons.”

“What was that?” you asked.

“That day we said we had brewery business, that trade show. We didn’t go. We drove up to your brother’s house and had a talk, the three of us,” he said.

“I see you two lived,” you said. Jensen laughed, rubbing the back of his neck.

“We explained the situation to him. He still thought we were assholes which we were,” he said.

“It was all our faults. Everyone forgot to talk when that’s the most important thing there is to this thing,” you said.

“I know. But still. It went longer than expected and we were going to drive home but he offered to let us stay the night, said something like you’d never speak to him again if we got in an accident on the way home,” said Jensen. “De got a bit scared later that night. Some stuff he said got to her and she didn’t know how to prove to you that what she felt and what I felt was real and she started thinking we were going to lose you again. I didn’t have an answer. I don’t have an answer. I-”

“Don’t be scared,” you said softly. He smiled, nodding his head. “I know it’s real.”

“We’re not afraid anymore,” he said. “But the walls are a little thin in that old farmhouse and then there was Nate, poking his head in your old room and saying what is it about that bedroom that makes girls cry. I think he meant it as a joke but it pissed me off and I told him to stop and it set him off and then we were outside in the barn and I swear, I thought we were going to duke it out.”

“My brother thinks with his heart instead of his head a lot,” you said.

“I realize that so I started to speak his language,” said Jensen. “I told him we didn’t need him to remind us of our mistakes.”

“So I told this shrimpy little asshole to leave my sister alone,” said Nate, finding his way into the bedroom. “Guy wouldn’t take no for an answer.”

“Don’t harass people I love, Nathan,” you said.

“Well Jensen here spun it around on me and asked me to stop being selfish because it wasn’t about him or that cute redhead or even me. It was about you. All three of us wanted the same thing. You to be happy. Whatever your decision was, the three of us should respect it, whether that was you staying or leaving. He had a point,” said Nate.

“He ended up apologizing to De and me and we worked things out,” said Jensen.

“Good. I really want you guys to get along. I’d like my big brother to come visit more often too,” you said. “I know you get lonely in that house.”

“Yeah. I’ll be sure to be around more than I have in recent history,” he said. You saw JJ wander into the room, stopping in front of him. “Hi.”

“Are you mom’s brother?” she asked, looking back at you. “He’s bigger than Uncle Jared!”

“Mom?” he asked. She looked back at you again and then at him, like he didn’t get it. “Sorry, sweetie. I forgot you got two mom’s.”

“Can we play?” she asked.

“Yeah, kiddo,” said Nate, smiling as she took his hand. “I can tell you a whole bunch of stories about your mom I bet you never heard. She grew up on a farm you know.”

“Really?” she said. You laughed as they walked off together, you and Jensen heading back to the party.

“I knew sicking the kids on him would be a good move,” said De. “He’s a big softie under it all, isn’t he?”

“Yeah. Sarah was good at bringing that out in him. He didn’t want to get hurt again after she got sick,” you said.

“Why don’t we invite him to spend the next few days with us?” she said, Jensen nodding his agreement. “Let him get to know the kids, know us a bit better.”

“It is the slow season around the farm. I’m sure he could swing it,” you said.

“Great. We really want our brother in law to be a part of our family too,” said Jensen. You saw Nate’s ear twitch up, probably subtle enough that they wouldn’t notice but Nate was used to quiet and alone and he’d always been a good eavesdropper. You smiled and looked over at him, getting a nod and smile in return before JJ was handing him a toy.

“I’m pretty sure he wants to be part of it too.”

[kwanzaa-wakanda]

Why Kwanzaa?

1. Because I want a cultural outlet that has the potential to unite all Black people regardless of where they come from. We can all honor our individual and collective history, ancestry, oppressions, cultures, families, and communities during Kwanzaa whether we are Diasporic Africans or Continental Africans.

2. Because every other Black holiday in the US is either too specific (MLK Jr. Day, Juneteenth) or more focused on education than a good time (Black History Month). Nothing wrong with education, but we need both informative holidays and fun ones.

3. Because it's ours and just ours. No one else can come into Kwanzaa and control it. They can barely profit off it. And I know that's part of why other people hate it, because they can't come in and change it's politics, insert their gods into this secular space, copy and paste their cultures and icons, then wrap the whole thing up in a box and sell it back to us for $19.95. And I think that's wonderful.

4. Because no other holiday encourages Black people to learn about Africa's past and present, and fight for its future. We need holidays that remind us that we were living in a rich, diverse continent before we were enslaved and it was colonised. Kwanzaa is the first, and we can and should create more.

5. Because it's cold outside, I want to have fun with my family and eat some good food. But I am neither a believer in the divinity of Christ nor in the inherent consumerism and subtle colonialism of presenting Christmas as a "secular" holiday.

6. Because Kwanzaa specifically reminds us that there is and always will be work to perform for the maintenance of our communities and cultures if we want to not only survive, but thrive.

7. Because we can use Kwanzaa to facilitate a cultural return to Africa. Already we don ankara and learn Swahili for the holiday. But we can make it bigger and do more. We can learn other languages and don other fashions. We can learn other traditions in the continent and diaspora of ancestral reverence. We can try our hands at preparing and eating new foods. We can learn about the different festivals of the continent and diaspora centered around similar themes of history, ancestral reverence, the beginning of a new year, and the honoring of children.

8. Because anything that we decide we don't like about Kwanzaa, we can change. It's OURS, no one elses. We can make it whatever we need it to be.

9. Because let's face it, the backlash isnt really about Karenga or the misinformation surrounding the holiday. If it had been started by Rosa Parks and well publicized so no one thinks obvious facts we always knew were "gotchas" against the validity of the festival, then it would still be hated and despised for daring to be different, apolitical, closed off, and secular.

10. Because we can celebrate it regardless of our religions, while not being prevented from including our faiths. Kwanzaa is secular, but you can include Kwanzaa in how you explore your faith. Do Kwanzaa at your church, mosque, synnagoge, or temple and it's a religious act that only some people can attend. Do it at the MLK Jr. Memorial Community Center and it's something the whole community can attend.

11. Because you can still do 7 days of presents if you really want, and still practice anti-consumerism. The three default kwanzaa presents are books, food, and clothes. You can do 7 days of books and food and clothes if you want. And if your presents can't fit that mold, that's still okay becauae you're encouraged to support Black owned businesses during kwanzaa (and no, Beats by Dre doesn't count). You can also do kwanzaa with no gifts whatsoever. But Kwanzaa should not have you standing in the cold parking lot of the mall at 5am on Black Friday every year.

13. Because it's already tradition, and that tradition is catching on. From school activities to community celebrations, to Kwanzaa Crawl, a lot of Black people have put in effort to keep Kwanzaa in our lives and continue to do so today. It's not a 400 year old tradition, but we have the power to make it so one year at a time. No, it's not the entire Black population, but it doesnt have to be just yet. Everything has to start somewhere, and kwanzaa can start with us.

14. Because kwanzaa is not a racial epithet or stereotype. I get why some people are suspicious when non-black people just assume we celebrate kwanzaa. But the answer isnt to throw the baby out with the bathwater. We don't have to shun and degrade this holiday and everyone that celebrates it. If we did that with everything, then our people wouldn't have anything left. We've already allowed anti-blackness to nearly wipe out our religions, languages, and hairstyles. Imagine if we let it wipe out our music, our cooking, and our sense of fashion? We cannot be so concerned with how others see us that we're willing to discard our identities or marginalize those among us that refuse to assimilate.

15. Because Black people living right now have a lot of despair. If we don't get killed by the state for saying the state shouldn't kill us with impunity, if we aren't unable to vote for the right for the convicted to vote because we are ourselves current and ex-convicted, if we aren't in college because our parents and their parents and their parents could never go, then we're still living in poverty, being manipulated by loan companies that want to force us into situations where we have to torture our bodies for our daily bread. Whether that's in the office, the stores, or the athletic field, they want us out here killing ourselves to earn our right to live. And that's just America. Go anywhere else and you may see people eating mud because there's no food left, living under oppressive regimes more open than the US in their tyranny over their citizens, seeing children struggling to provide for their houses when they should be in school, all the while truly believing that the US is better. Kwanzaa doesn't hide from the uglier sides of our condition, it makes us remember that they exist while invigorating us with a new energy to fight for our people every year.

16. Because Black people living right now have a lot of hope. Remember the global impact Black Panther had on our people. Look at how many Black people in the US are reclaiming our ancestral religions and spiritualities. Think of the new fashion, art, musical and cultural movements we have going right now. Remember the political movements in all of our countries that are recognizing the interconnectedness of our struggles. The hope we're living on right now is exactly the type of hope that kwanzaa is based on fighting for. That's why hope is the final principal of Kwanzaa, called Imani. We celebrate kwanzaa because for a lot of us, that's the only time of the year that we have to truly reflect and see all this hope for all the value it holds.

17. Because kwanzaa reminds us that who we naturally are is enough. Our mothers shouldnt be straightening our hair for a kwanzaa celebration. We shouldnt be demanding that our people talk like white people at a kwanzaa celebration. We don't have to worry about being the first person to grab the watermelon or fried chicken at a kwanzaa celebration. Kwanzaa allows us to be Black, tooth gaps and all. And most importantly, it reminds us that those of our community that would insult and degrade us for being ourselves are fundamentally wrong.

Kwanzaa is not useless. It is not a farce. It is a cultural outlet of the Black community to recognize the inherent validity in our lives. Kwanzaa is the time that we appreciate who we ALL are and how we got here. If we didnt have Kwanzaa, I would sincerely hope that we would create another holiday just like it to remind us that we are more than just victims of slavery, colonialism, and white supremacy without erasing the memories of those that suffered at the hands of those attrocities. Because as long as Black people are living outside of our homelands, and our continent is being destroyed by colonizers and their coups, then Black people are going to need Kwanzaa or something just like it. And ideally, we will always have Kwanzaa AND something just like it.

[cap-samwilson]

ghosts that we knew

wingfic. six original avengers. angst, with no comfort. mentions of murder, suicide, abuse, and alcoholism. 

on ao3 here.

natasha’s wings are… white.

a shock to her, to anyone who knows her. how is the black widow one with wings as white as snow, no soot or stain daring to change the color. but they’re perfect, as pure as the sacrificial lambs of old.

she uses them, when she can. letting them fan out to attract her mark. the light can filter through them, she looks like an angel (and no one’s original when they say it to her, asking when she fell from heaven, and she grins and plays along until they see how well she bites).

(angels don’t bite.)

she hates them. keeps them tight against her body. wishes she had wings dark as night, wings that showed just how fucked up she really is. but not even the red room can’t change that what’s in her genes. the same thing that makes her hair red is what makes her wings white.

red in her ledger. white on her back. they mock her in the mirror.

(a poor family, the snow freezing them. they were rich once. her mother’s hair, father’s beard, as red as her own. him, wandering out into the cold. never returning. her, dying in her sleep, as pale as the blanket that covers the city. and the girl vanishes. never returns.)

no one knows what happens to the family out by the tree line. one day they’re there. next they’re not, none except the mother, frozen to her sheets. so much for russian strength. the police don’t ask around. just the little boy in the village, who remembers the red of his friend’s hair, the puffy look of her wings. silenced by his mother, who takes him by the arm. they don’t look back as she hisses in his ear.

“отсутствует. маленькая девочка, которую больше никогда не увидишь. паук на ее месте.”

missing. the little girl, you will never see again. spider in her place. 

-

“you will never fly.”

steve punches a wall after that doctor’s appointment. ends up walking straight to his mother with tears streaming down his face, bucky offering the sheepish smile this time around as they thrust forward a broken wrist and three broken fingers for examination.

“you will never fly.”

his wings are so sparse, they look like someone plucked a chicken clean. pulled the feathers clean off, leaving nothing but the bones. no meat to be seen. pathetic. useless. the army won’t clear him based on the sight of him alone. maybe next time, kid. eat some more food, kid. go pick up some scrap, kid.

“you will never fly. but if i can help it, of course, give you a chance to fly… what would you do with it?”

“i don’t like bullies. don’t care where they’re from. what their wings look like.”

the serum gives him wings. beautiful ones, too. they’re strong, deep, brown. look like they were made for a man ten feet taller than the little kid who punched walls and used trash cans as shields. he can fly now. it takes a while to learn, but he can do it. he does it well.

his wings work fine.

so why can’t he catch bucky when he falls from that fucking train?

his wings work fine.

but when he’s putting the ship in the water, he doesn’t use ‘em.

-

he’s embarrassed about them, y’know.

they’re nothing graceful. by the time’s he’s two they look like they can engulf him. his father yells at him for it. screams that that he’s a freak. his mother cowers.

years later she’s gone, and bruce sees blood on his hands. his father’s blood is on the pavement.

if anything, they grow as he does. they fill rooms, the closets he hides in. so he keeps them wrapped up tight. keeps them pulled close around him, at night, when the shakes start. he never flies. never dares to lift his eyes above the ground he’s walking on. but he makes it. somehow. he can think for himself after all and does a hell of a job doing it.

liz laughs at his wings. like she gets the joke, the professor in his glasses with the wings meant for a professional athlete. her father laughs along. but for the first time, bruce laughs with them. because if it makes her smile, well. he’s willing to trip over a few feathers.

his wings fit around her. the room is full of them, and her laughter and the smell of the breakfast they’re cooking. she preens, straightens them out when they bend. the molt happens, and she helps pick up the pieces.

until she’s gone. and it’s all because of him.

the room is full of his feathers, the piles he leaves behind like further proof that she’s not coming back. harder to pick up with one set of hands, so he doesn’t. harder to fix the ones out of place when he can’t reach, so he refuses to. they fold against his back, and they never fill a room, because the only thing that deserves that honor is the way elizabeth ross smiled.

her father agrees.

how does a man with huge wings hide?

he runs.

(he flies.)

-

“the asgardians are a proud race,” odin tells them, and the authority makes their knees shake. even thor’s, as he stares at his father, at what he’s meant to be one day. “these wings, a gift from the gods. our strength, above all others in the universe. but we must be as strong with them as we are without.”

he can see it, even as a child. the coronation. beautiful women on his arms. loki by his side. he will be a good man. a great king. better than odin could ever be.

it is easy to practice. to pretend he holds the scepter, the crown on his head. to place bandages on his eye, tied behind his head, and boom his boys in an empty throne room. it is easy to see the future when that’s all you have ahead of you.

but soon he sees nothing else. sees nothing but the women that woo him and his friends that encourage him and his brother who envies him. he sees nothing else. mjolnir comes to him, and he feels it in every bone. he strikes down every enemy. what else does he need to tell him that he will be what he was always meant to be?

when they fight, he feels no wounds. he feels the wind in his hair, the chill of ice in his toes. watches giants fall, and challenges laufey where he sits above them.

a good king. he will be a good king.

“i was protecting our people!” he screams at his father, and he is a child again. his knees are shaking.

“you were protecting your pride!”

the world stops. the Bifrost splits open, and thor sees the rainbow, the crackling crystals. cold as jotunheim.

“i strip you of your power,” his father returns, and he sees not his father – he sees the odin of old. sees his fury, sees the pale horse he rides on. “i strip you of your wings. you do not deserve our ancestor’s gifts. you are a disgrace.”

his wings are gone.

he is falling.

so much for a good king.

-

the day after his father dies, clint barton turns in some homework, smokes behind the bleachers, and gives one last smile to the kid in his french class before he disappears.

the bartons were a dirty name anyway – it wasn’t like them leaving didn’t do more good than trying to stay in the house on the corner. the damn thing is torn down once they’re gone, and the property value of the whole neighborhood goes up a few thousand bucks.

no one brings them up again. because if they think about it too long, then they become part of the problem. the murder-suicide of a couple on the corner, the bruises on the boys’ necks. the father that drank, the mother that smoked.

so they let the boys leave, in their father’s ratty coup that barely fit the younger one. he was growing so fast he was gangly, and his wings could barely keep up. the older has his jaw so tight it’s gonna snap, and it does when the younger drops a box and starts crying like he killed his mom himself.

(he thinks he did. he couldn’t hear her, he couldn’t hear her, and no matter how many times he says that his brother shuts him up soon enough.)

and then they’re gone. they leave the box on the sidewalk.

later, the whole neighborhood sees the sign. the circus is in town, and everyone gathers to take a peek. there’s not much else to do in the place anyway, besides cheer for some high school football.

they scream loudly for each performer. someone walks on his hands. the lions dazzle. and an archer does a stunt with his brother that has the whole crowd whooping. when he flies, they all stare. goes up to his perch until the end of the show. he’s a favorite with the kids, but leaves the adults puzzled.

they can’t connect the dots. the long limbs, the striped wings, the look in his eyes like shattered glass inside a cardboard box.

“how could they,” barney snorts into his beer, “if they never bothered looking in the first place?”

-

they’re delicate. so fragile they snap when he comes crying into the world. tony cries so loud that the doctors almost don’t seem them, the bright red plumage, the color that never dulls. and when they heal, he never puts them away, especially since that’s all his father wants him to do.

“put those damn things away,” howard says, and the anger that simmers in his tone ripples the whiskey in his glass. “you’re not a girl. you don’t fucking flaunt.”

his mother is quiet, staring at her plate. tony isn’t even sure what her wings look like. what his mother looks like when she lifts off the ground. she is stiff. unmoving. the stillest of life, if that’s even what hides behind her eyes.

tony refuses to be silenced by howard, and his forced vibrancy almost burns him out.

he drinks, he dances, he flies in the night sky. the amount of times he almost get shot, the frustration from rhodey and the eye rolls from pep. they hit a steel wall and fall to the ground. he is invincible. he’s a god among men.

howard can’t scream at him anymore. can’t tell him to put his wings away. the quiver of maria’s lip can’t haunt him. he is his own man, he tells the women, tells the men, tells rhodey, tells pepper. they kiss him to shut him up, they huff, they laugh.

he’s his own man.

the whiskey doesn’t answer.

the humvee blows. his wings are out, basically pressed against the sides of the car as he takes the picture with the soldiers. the feathers singe. red becomes black and becomes red again.

put those damn things away.

oh, he could laugh if he didn’t cry first.

[kdtheghostwriter]

SNK 113 - Ruthless Aggression

(A strange light fills the forest. Twilight is shining through the leaves. It seems the journey is finally over.)

(Levi is filled with DETERMINATION.)

The people who pick this story up after it’s been completed will enjoy it so much better than some of those reading it month-to-month. Those who get to read it in one go will in no way believe that Levi - humanity’s strongest soldier - surrounded by high anchor points in the Forest of Big Ass Trees, armed with a full tank of gas and a full stock of blades could ever lose a fight to Zeke or any amount of Titans.

Upon his return to Marley, Zeke hoped and prayed to the gods he doesn’t believe in that he would never see an Ackerman ever again. Now you see why. Zeke fights an Ackerman; Zeke goes splat.

I’d like to introduce to you the concept of ‘reads.’ Many of you are no doubt familiar. For those that aren’t: it’s the concept of predicting your opponent’s next action based upon whatever habits you have perceived from them. This concept is relevant in every kind of sporting event but also in video games and even chess, where much of a player’s moves are determined by the characteristics of whatever piece they are using.

TL;DR – Zeke attempted a hard read on Levi and got exposed.

If Zeke was anything more than a disconnected third party – if he had lived in the hell the Survey Core has known for years – he would have known better than to tempt Levi with a choice of morality. Levi Ackerman came from nothing. Born in the underground amongst outlaws, raised by a serial killer to be stronger than his frame would allow. Levi has done many heroic deeds, but no one, not even his colleagues in the military, would confuse him for a hero. Not in the classic sense anyway.

Think about Batman. DC Comics’ most enduring icon, he has been in publication for more than eight decades. He has to his name some of the most daring feats in fiction (including beating the shit out of Superman, repeatedly) but is he a hero, though?

Sadfleck is right! Bruce is a “good guy” by all accounts. He fights villains and saves his hometown. And he does so in highly illegal fashion. Levi is quite similar. He’s a vigilante with diplomatic immunity, that is unless I imagined the whole military coup to overthrow the puppet monarchy. The famous panel of Levi forgoing his humanity as Armin has so often referenced has been reposted too often to count, but it’s the most important one to his character. We know for a fact that Levi’s empathy is his defining trait; however, people like Zeke mistake that empathy for all-around goodness.

Levi is a good soldier that does horrid things, but he does those things in the interest of completing his goal, which usually involves saving as many innocents as possible. Thus, when you give him the choice of killing his comrades or dying and failing his mission, there is no choice anymore. You didn’t stop him. You didn’t even slow him down. All you did was make him mad. An angry Ackerman is scarier than any giant.

(Hanji feels like they are going to have a bad time.)

Again, I’ll say: Hanji Zoe was the right and only choice to succeed Erwin. I’ll add to that this chapter by saying that Keith Shadis wasn’t as bad as he thinks he was. Just unremarkable. Erwin’s scouting tactics were a stroke of genius that only a gifted mind could have devised. For the last decade, Shadis has been carrying the weight of his shortcoming and punishing himself. It’s why he doesn’t reprimand the students in the newly minted 109th Squad who brazenly call him obsolete for the entire class to hear. It makes the following interaction very interesting.

Floch Forster and the Jaegerists (what a punk band that would be) storm into the hall in order to recruit the graduated soldiers to their cause. Floch gives them the Durden-esque task of assaulting their instructor Shadis until he can’t stand. What I find interesting here is Shadis’ reaction. Hanji does their best to defuse the situation, and the rookies even look hesitant about attacking. That is until Shadis provokes them, and they brutalize him in a fit of rage. Is this the retribution that Shadis has been seeking all along?

If Eren is the Heel who thinks he’s the Face and Zeke is the monster Heel that destroys everyone (except his rival, lol), then Floch is the classic chicken shit Heel that gets all his confidence from hiding behind his meal ticket. It is a classic archetype that precedes wrestling by many centuries and Isayama has executed it to perfection with Floch. So over-the-top and dastardly. No person could be this mean unless they were written to do so. It makes the eventual comeuppance that much more satisfying when it happens.

 We finally have a name to put with the face we’ve seen in past flashbacks. The previous owner of Zeke’s glasses whom I must assume is the previous holder of the Beast Titan based upon the impromptu game of catch. In a pain-filled haze, Zeke recalls his sensei and tells him to wait, as he still must complete his mission. You can imagine that sentiment extends to his half-brother as well.

If that’s not Archvillain Energy, I don’t know what is.

Stray Thoughts

- We got a new tally of all the people under Zeke’s influence. Spoilers: it’s a high number. Falco is included, Hanji is not. Not only did she avoid the wine but it also tells me that Onyankopon is legit (for now at least).

- Floch apparently had this little revenge planned for Shadis from the rip. Add “petty af” to his long list of offenses.

- We still don’t know everything about how P A T H S work. Given that Zeke is royalty and Eren is related, there is at least a slim chance the next chapter ends with the older brother being tracked and his sibling showing up at whatever location Levi is taking him.

- The 104th has been detained and imprisoned. We see them in varying states of discouragement and sadness - except for Mikasa, whose face is hidden entirely. Big yikes.

- The Queen is a ticking time bomb in more ways than one. Her status and well-being means nothing less than the future survival of Paradis. If that’s where Levi is headed, boy is he in for a Soo-Prise.

[ambwimagines]

BTS and Black Cinema

Inspired by @takanoriwatas.

A lil twist on movie night

First up Namjoon:

Being that you both are Intellectuals and that this movie resembles you guys relationship all too closely. You were pretty excited when you unveiled your movie choice for tonight. "Babe I got Love Jones Starring Larenz Tate and Nia Long" a few minutes into the movie you guys have a deep interesting conversation about love and how it could go and connection on a soul level and not just a physical manner. "Hey babe Nia Long looks just like you""I wish I could look as good as her.

Jung Hoseok

A mood lightener so obviously it's kinda funny but it also has a message. It was his turn to pick from your cabinet so he picked a Tyler Perry Play Madea goes to jail. He found it funny how boisterous and outspoken the character was he laughed and really listened to the things that the play was trying to convey. "So things like that really happen to people ? to little girls""Well there are thousands of children in the US who go through and age out of the foster system and who knows the kinds of people they're born to, thankfully she had a mother who was focused on her and when she got out she was set on making things right for her and her child unfortunately all cases don't end that way." It's great to laugh with Hobi and really talk a bit about some stuff with Hobi. Its just always fun and fulfilling with him

Kim Seokjin

Jason's Lyric is such an understated peice of black cinema like so many more people should see it. And that is why you brought it for the both of you to watch as a couple. From a mother's love to a lover's touch every part and facet of this movie is filled with love even if it is a tougher version of it in some instances. The underlying message of it is love and he caught on to that pretty quickly "I don't understand why she had to die I mean he didn't have to shoot her." Jin says sniffling "I don't know either but it's such a good movie" you try your best to enunciate through your crying. You both lean on each other with tears streaming down your face as the screen fades to black and the credits begin to roll.

Min Yoongi

Typical action guy, You couldn't sneak a chick flick in on him if you tried. And since you picked the movies consecutively over the past weekend you figured you could compromise tonight and let him watch his action movie. He pulled Takers from the bottom shelf and took one look at the cover and said "Now this is my kind of movie, where have you been hiding this" Just an entire evening of crashes explosions and gunshots on surround sound. Yoongi almost knocked over the entire bowl of popcorn. "oooh babe did you see the way he jumped over that car!? He's so cool" "Yeah baby I saw it" you say rolling your eyes.

Park Jimin

"Baby let's watch this" he says holding up a copy of Think like a man. He puts in the DVD and you both begin to watch it. The scene with Gabrielle Union and her man comes on "babe do I act like him?" "No baby of course not." You assure him." You're just short like him""Yeah wait til this goes off I'll show you how short I am." Jimin says tickling your sides. He rests his head of fluffy hair back in your lap and you two enjoy the rest of the movie.

Kim Taehyung

"Tae Tae bay bay what you wanna watch tonight love" you say energetically, He slides out your favorite movie from under the cushion."FRIDAAAYYYY" you quietly scream. Taehyung knows you so well. He puts in the DVD and his eyes go back and forth between the screen and your face. He watched a little bit of the movie but really he was waiting for the part. The part that cracked you up every time. The part where Smokey was running up and down the street in his underware and ended up in a chicken coup. Your let out the ugliest laugh you even snorted in front of him which is something you vowed to never do. He just smiled because he loved to watch you thoroughly enjoy yourself. You could laugh your real laugh and just be yourself with Taehyung. He loved you and all that it meant to be you. " You got knocked the fuck out" you both screamed to the top of your lungs before bursting into a fit of laughter. Being interrupted by the loud banging of your elderly next door neighbor signaling you to quiet down. You two quietly laughed some more. "I love you so much Taehyung."

Jeon Jungkook

"What's Baby Boy about? Is it about babies?" Jungkook asked about looking at the cover curiously sounding like a 1st grader. " In a round about way" you explain. He pops in the DVD out of curiosity and the movie starts "There's this psychiatrist, a lady named Frances Chris Walson. She has a theory about the black man in America. She says because of the system of racism in this country, the black man is meant to think of himself as a baby. A not yet fully formed being, who has not yet realized his full potential. To support her claim, she offers the following: First off, what does a black man call his woman? Mama. Secondly, what does a black man call his closest acquaintances? His boys. And finally, what does a black man call his place of residence? The crib." By the end of the movie Tyrese is Depicted playing cards with his wife Yvette and then there are these other scenes of people getting their lives together. You look over at jungkook and he's so confused. "But I don't get it." "Okay so....." You begin to explain "The title baby boy is a metaphor basically for immature guys who can't grow up and own their responsibilities." "Like in the beginning Jody had a baby by Yvette and wasn't nessecarily there with his child all the time and by the end he basically realized it was time for him to grow up and be a man and that's what he did. And certain things will make you come to that realization." "You know who did that for me Y/N?" Jungkook asks "Who?"

"You" he says

"Awwww baby" you say kissing his cheek and hugging him.

"One day I'll be there for you and a ra and I'll protect and provide for you both, you guys will be my motivation and the thing that pushes me forward and most importantly you'll be there." He says grabbing your hand and kisses it

"I'll be your Jody"

"You better not cheat on me"

"I can't make any promises" he says laughing as you play hit him several times with limp hands.

Jody Your Jody

I hope you guys liked it cause I spent alot of time making it. If you wanna see more stuff like this request it and I will surely work on it Love and Peace

~Kayla ✌

[iotaarcane]

XnationalZ

BUSY BLOW TORCHING DABS

Door doesn’t open it glides on rails like the entrance impales tracks leave scabs

They pick at them like a flurry of energy inertly imperil and in peril while sterile the enemy isn’t at his post busy blow torching dabs

Laughing gas to a mass of brain cells that might as well been in cell or for sale to sell for the fact of not being usable like loud theater patrons at musical

Stomping footsteps upsets the stairwell, Hercule as security

picks you up and while airborne you get the farewell.

A good bye of sorts a great try physically the body with a little help contorts but spiritually its dormant in hibernation protected in a fort.  The outside winds set him to the maximum miles per hour bumping over the welts.   Swelling is mainstream never go underground.  A golf club waving at lightning

A day filled with bad decisions.   A perfect life a nocturnal health freak who is slowing dying because of the hours he choose to sleep.  North of the sauna lives out of water a piranha gills with chankla….  Flip flop the hip hop to this mantra….   They got Bin Laden but the tomatoes slices cut au gratin and their insides just by general principal all rotten every good deed all but forgotten.

They attempted because it looked great on camera to have caughten Sadam but the madam of the ministry secretly had  many a body double dangling feet from noose corpse of course wasn’t who they thought they had bad DNA tests fail when not given. You’ll just straight believe without any thought or thinking in a closed space trying to identify who is stinking. This planet in that galaxy is sinking below where it once orbited and your whole existence is defined of what you afforded how toxins are absorbed y’all point the finger iota morbid.

As blood dripping on everything like a loop of hemoglobin training goblins to run tasks on apps.  Hairless ape with only a little fur missing - hand and the wrist  slice is still fresh magenta pink placenta veiny underwent chef prep,  impractical to prevent a story to end like this begin as it went, we muster the emotion to climb street curb like step, tentacle suction cup girlfriend tales like cotton swab on bunny ear manifesto.  One piece bikini transacting - posts no bill.  Open register the creditor turned into a collector, an editorial of breadwinner meanwhile back in the western hemisphere sky is too clear - cuts retina sundries colander fluid filter an array of enemies attacked the command post.  The mid morning foray angrily adjusted.  You could totally notice the moment the ward went kaleidoscope twist 33 degree.  As the crow fly viewpoint saw the west wing extend and to what seems like an elbow bend but they aint drinking consuming much of nothing except orders from the chief who dictates the whereabouts and you gotta be down cannot have doubts they don’t come in shouts - illest hand signals in the game it’s an artistic beauty to see the tic for tac counterattack he who gets the most vagina must be the Mack.  Diesel easel drawer no undies they were left in dresser drawer and if it don’t work out oh no the lawyer is not pro bono yet the retainer fixed the teeth apprehended the beef no more issues.

Him whose piss poor planning continues will be facing the sultry seductress Miss Hughes 4 feet 6 shoes opposite of the elephant of Hindus infamous for the pop ins on miscues So real was breakfast cereal mammal sauce from cashews.   Nipple hula hoop sports car aficionado drop top in the coupe where they kept the chickens.   Jumpy trampoline mouth fortune reader foreseen vulgar obscene potty lips unclean that contingency of the attorney of where wonder land on a poca dot which marks the spot.  Accuracy solar hot, lift off broke apart space shuttle heat pads over hot not matter if they were chosen or not.  Nudity not as bad as could be frontal, wide opening little exit funnel so many come backs you can’t shoot down every rebuttal.  We double as secret agents where birds are fowl and flagrant evil as the vortex in control of this spaceship.  I got it plannded see use that ladder granted to climb into the zoo – carefully pinpoint were from the top we landed snag a handful thus huck right between their eyes candid close to the nose as possible rancid so they go crazy - ape shit

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++NOTHING and LIKE it

You’ll get nothing and like it. No matter how much you despite it.

Like you wanted that new whip but you were too good for the bus so you bike it. 

Like it ever mattered – your best bud did the same inebriated on the way home dump truck made him splattered we identified the body basically because only thing left the t-shirt he wore that night tattered.   I want a hamburger – with a vegan patty in the current state of Armageddon it doesn’t look good brethren Xnational that’s why I rock the same hairdo as a Tibetan.  No a cheese burger yall overreacting on this meat is murder so is a relentless ethic of work especially when exhausted and it hurt. We’ve been threatened by a heavy weapon.  I was reading about Reagan and outline seems Pagan that’s as good for you as dippin Copenhagen spittin telling the surgeon do not beckon the question I love when my gummies are redden.  Cancer of the embouchure is more than a Horoscope sign I concur.   I want a hot dog.  Smothered in mustard covered in meat trimmings ground up chemicals as the fixings.  Bought my rhymes with a great bargain from Groupon.  Even added a discount photoshopped counterfeit coupon. Creating to the beat the loops on.  I don’t know is a Bentley a Rolls Royce because in the back seat the window lowered and I was offered grey poupon do you happen to have another choice.  Already had condiments on my weenie.  Get off my computer don’t you dare peep my documents.  My sentiments exactly the conference in regards to arguments approximates Many inter-nationalities at least 3 continents. Ancestor occupants with these words I’m a biochemist marketing guerrillas in the midst of this mist.  We the tapestry of ornaments via the internets correspondents it’s like I’m studied on my own no paperwork to show my doctorate of rocking it.  I want a milkshake mixed extra thick so it actually improves my life.  Massacre in the streets.  Soul gets fasten to the beats.  Emotion in a drum pattern.  Puts the spirit at ease changes lives makes memories.  We reminisce lacking candor look back in retrospect kinesis situational intensity convince myths as the centripetal force drifts making you cause conflicts with the dame you caressed whose early departure has you dismissed flailing arms is a fit temper tantrum get nothing and like it anthem in this for the marathon and beyond whereupon such a large portion of our population is related to Genghis Khan.  What was going on?  Mating a savage motivation bondage of ancestral astral projections.  In a succession of going with aggression. Talking too much now I’m a witness to this confession.  I didn’t want to know that nor should you want to share it - in your heart bear with it. I need to check up on what era that was. I want potato chips crisper than a whisper in a dark room embracing solitude twiddling a whisker brisker than podcast radio transistor, he was very bad only did one movie but he was a fister, turned that lifestyle around and became a wonderful listener, except after he kissed her, she fiddled his zipper, polished half handle of liquor, hand cuffs cutoff circulation like a prisoner, as she moved towards his waistline she announced OK noodle, his phone screen lit up he couldn’t get up - his unit wouldn’t get up, Here is the kicker, she addressed yours is so much pinker, than red shade of a swisher, Oh yes it is sir right when she was about to go to town cell phone screen with the rear camera face down accessed a video Oh yes Mister Fisher.  Vid featuring a debutante with oily wrist smash grab a sphincter.   Homegirl peeped it out the corner of her eye.  Jeez Louise Guy, you think she liked it, those are screams of terror why did you video tape and mic it?  Payback is real He said no no stop she said you will get nothing and like it.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Bloop Didn't Match Bleep

Flat line monitor they filed with the manufacturer to get truth because bloop didn’t match bleep

Was she dead or deep asleep it takes a large leap of courage to surpass milestones when laid out flat on  back thick as a board bright as feather totally do laps passing my stone counting per mile our style lashes out flashes of the bang - boom go sky.  They hope when it’s over something changes dramatically like a star fall macho man bar brawl telekinetic script to anyone one whom you bonded importance of existence is something you cannot deny.  

Fly by the seat of pants, advance like cash flow, difficult to rap slow, I wanna run it like you need it get roller pinned and kneaded, Hebrew jui-jitsu submission look at what his knee did.  Star of David on his playlist we turning off tech on Satur no matter bribery or how you flatter your condolences belated along with ski masks raided should of seen them coming the porch was shaded driveway isolated doctrine confirmed over something we traded urine peptide beaker foggy but perplex this –  His best amigo did too much acid like amino so when he was at cathouse heard a whore moan he could only cognate behavior to influence mood balanced hormone as the counterpoint feline payment never transacted fee to wait in line.   What skill or excellences are you pursuing how can you portray without any cueing.  Hit your marks.  Spit in pitch black fire mouth out sparks.  

It’s your energy that relay tend to take opposition and sway.  Assists their dishin’ drug addicts spinning to get spun on a mission in addition to addiction they act like they don’t lie this is no audition you’re grown why you want permission to ruin your life You see in LA a Bruin cub a forty niner in Long Beach data gets scrubbed unit information placed out of reach.   Look what the cat drug in, breeze blew in you could have been somebody a shoo in.  Migrated to Peru in a mobile pyramid amongst doubters, its like the shouters are first with inside out lower lip pouters claim to be ballers all they are is browsers knickerbockers shirtless with trousers waving a give me a freebie voucher so I roll with moon howlers now does this overwhelm like towers stimulates give us powers of the third kind and our encounters.  

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++

Gun Laws

-  No fun wit dem laws especially when encountering rough edges grainy surface with gun laws

-  The cause is mass hysteria because amendments put both sides into a predicament

-  Wing of the Eagle into action Xnational Activist after a sour apple up spring the people Active Fist raised above the forehead concurrently nobody wants more dead.

-  Not even the gunman but what about that run in my states Capitol Sacramento

-  Odd… Cell phone is not a weapon 20 trigger pulls the Police can act like a beast, On tempo protest Florida mad man rampaged blood everywhere escorted in handcuffs away facial expression wonder struck departed campus quad

-  Dem our rights in dat bill but that bill was proclaimed before our land fell ill Overdose of fluoride oxygen intoxicants horrible supplements processed food and diabetes from too much sugar in condiments

-  Now to fix your country don’t be chicken like poultry spend love to arrange a redeeming elixir

- This is precise calculation when you are overcrowded too many people in population the hypertension trying to keep up with what you commercially demonstrating sort of like an exchange of demon trading evil for evil soul grasp tool sickle--- Concise to arbitration overcrowded too many people in population the hypertension trying to keep up with what you commercially demonstrating sort of like is regal viper fang retention seek help contemplating like gleaming shovel off moonshine fickle.  

-  Everything even your status is the status materialism is the apparatus zero the sum on the abacus but yet the ability to function not be bullied or tempted to destroy yourself or others can be uncontrollable

-  Mental health doesn’t have a look so why they judge based on the cover texture ink print of book

-  No civilian needs an automatic machine gun.  Home protection can be accomplished with 20 gauge is plenty.  

- There are more guns in the US than people.  So agree with March for our lives.  I disagree with anything I’m not feeling and if we all could be a Democracy and meet in the middle we all should be fine with the compromise.

- First person liver body organ problem corking, ostrich keeping dome piece dipped into land chunks hoping not to get things out of proportion

-  News was sidetracked Porn Star had protection less sex with President along with a dry cleaner hanger abortion clinic minute men attacking those who look immigrated

- It’s a circle of blood you been initiated.  We do not exist in a dystopia but these large organizations can paint whatever portrait they want to fit into an agenda

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++You Can Be Anything

You are where you at in fact you could go where you want to be and you can be anything

So easy to feel like nothing complain and become doubtful with a mouthful of evil they walk in a horrible path of negativity and self-destruction same time place continuum hurting others while they just trying to get through the same as you do.  What is this reasoning?  Who created the outline?  Why if I don’t play ball can’t I get a pass down on the baseline? Appeasing you either got to be a mover and shaker or to the sideline your thrown and labeled a space waster.  Money identifies so much.  Status class how your friends and family eat continuous and fast.  Totally empty posthumous till those on top of the power structure find those beneath humorous.  Better teeth greater smile success is subjective.  I took the elective to be me why don’t you be you. Underneath all the bogus ideas and understandings  I breathe near the 14th of the month only to inhale and not exhale for another 30.  If you do business justified you can really be wealthy if you lied play dirty. Landing around the 5th I derail in a matter of moments look sick and pale living again for less than allowed.  Now the natural lines in my face is  scowled. I want to be an xnational not into whats in or rational I’ve never admired reality TV or what is force fed to me. The world is very fluid with whats not allowed how you make your bread and weather you get a box or become dust when dead.  They never said it would be like this but they never stated it wouldn’t or couldn’t I’m tired of the chosen getting a vote I never balloted giving me basically 2 options on major decisions unanimously untalented more than perfected for the future while living slithering past the masses until something so major happens to a loved one a ugly ungloved one frozen in the headline archived content someplace indefinite it is about time.  Dig through scorched Earth.   Charred ground far fewer giblets in the stew to see self in mirror the spoon is wooden and sipping left a splinter too difficult to survive this nuclear winter.

++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++++To Get Bye

Chatted with an annoying carcass inverted in Caracas on an apparatus and we agreed about this

You’re all I need to get buy

-  The voice don’t know but like a bass line I record in mono Remember before I kissed a girl I got mononucleosis and this in general gave me a neurosis if I haven’t kissed how the heck did I get mono

-  Punctuality arriving pronto seconds click nimble with the fingertips pulling a combo characterized in metabolic state ketosis

-  Fasting near or around roses favorite floral Lotus.  To get by stay fly no aeronautics my aerobics consists of verbal trampoline pounce the guardrail carine upon the jet strip Don’t Trip.

-  Landing gear engaged to get by clearance from the air traffic controller, just this style is me high roller tip toeing soldier avoiding ebola maintain employment meeting or exceeding quota.

-  To get buy you need straight cash homie loads and loaves of bread cheddar or whatever Hamilton greenbacks, paper guap of franklin will do

-  To get by Your Blessing will be thee necessity sky beautiful.   Open heart to keep it plain and simple more than the crease unfolding the ripple

-  To get by clean water fresh air healthy food the ability to create mobility infinitely friends family meditation agility stretching.

-  Concept of these scriptures stacks all the to the back of literature willingness be the finesse all this and that’s success

-  To get by why try easier to complain make it artificial cause others through the tidal waves stress and strain

- Sitting on your knees sneaker heels tap the back of your button ups Long Barrel at temple.  Imagine the thoughts before you’re executed.   That process of it’s over.  Can you fanaggle?   Use communication for survival last chance come at them sideways like a tooth that snaggle

-  This snag will either end your current existence begin into a newish dimension an entrance how did these doors swing open? Never let them see you moping. Laugh in the face danger many elements to this for coping.

-   Change is a guarantee and you can’t get much of anything so constant.  Who can adapt the fastest?   Chip up as soon as society is cashless.  Global position the system while mapless.  I’m going to flow more rap less.

-  Concubine colorful sword edge dull, The Ktown market I copped it at in the China shop bull.     Tea party porcelain porcupine alarm module.

-  iota needs some soda caramel color cola so the bubbles can fix my upset tummy stay scummy my friend is a sin and not funny Lowest on totem pole that explains the mischievous grin

-  Never find work attitude be the jerk stay going bizerk at the store with the clerk make it impossible for them to accomplish the mish undertone a smirk relentless and abscessed until they fail find out it all evolved from silly little games your repercussions wrong answer given to test

-   Well rounded knew how art felt, Chemicals were spilt and the fumes of the 2nd story would melt.  Heartfelt never dealt a hand like that patience is all precious up til you are the doctors patients and he truly evil terrorize a boll weevil wore wild long tail lab coat crazy colors of crayon except no cotton all rayon and he would lay on the guilt deprive of medication till the truly ugly wanted to be killed subconsciously the whispers You’re all I need to get by…..

[stunudo]

BAU Prep School AU: Class of 18

Welcome to the Frederick Buchanan Institute located in scenic Quantico, Virginia, a senior high academy that shapes the best and brightest minds. Its motto is “Behavior, Analysis, Unity,” the mascot the Submariners, colloquially “the Unsubs”. The small school supports the most accomplished faculty from across the country. (image link)  2016-2017 school year  Class of 18

A/N: This title is a little misleading, but some scenes apply and will apply later. xoxo Stu

PUBLIC LIES

November 17, 2017 5:40pm

“Meg! Maya is here!” Chris called from the kitchen, he was answered by the thundering of footsteps down the stairs.

“Mai-ma!” Kit threw his hands up, hoping to greet their guest at the door.

“Not yet, buddy, you’ve got another bite or two before you can be released.”

“Mai-ma has dinner. Me want Mai-ma.” Meg led Maya into the kitchen, a bag of fast food in her arms.

“Hey Kitt-o. I have some fries here, but you gotta eat your green beans first. Deal?” Maya’s bright smile had the toddler’s attention.

“Nom-nom, Daddy!” Kit shoved a handful of beans and scraps of chicken into his mouth without so much of a glance at his fork.

“Well, there’s one way to get it down. Hi Maya, how’s it going?” Mr. Callahan stood up and brushed the crumbs from his pants.

“Great, Mr. C. How’s it going with you?”

“Same old, same old. You guys gonna be alright with three babies tonight?”

“Chris, come on. We’re going to be fine.” Meg rolled her eyes, sneaking one of Maya’s fries.

“Big boy! No baby.” Kit argued.

“Okay, are you guys going to be alright with this big guy and two babies? Better?” Kit grinned up at his dad with a mouth full of food, sending Meg and Maya into fits of repulsed laughter.

6:12pm

“Okay, what happens if there is a fire?” JJ looked down her nose at Meg and Maya sitting on the couch, piercing the babysitters’ very souls.

“I will get the kids outside while Maya calls 9-1-1.” Meg answered.

“How are you going to carry three children?” JJ countered. Meg rolled her eyes and stood up, she grabbed Jack by his overall straps, hugging Kit around his waist and picked up Henry’s carrier in her free hand.

“Like that, Ms. Jareau, seriously, we got this.” Maya tried not to laugh out right.

“Jayge? It’s going to be okay, they have our numbers if anything comes up.” Emily  tried to soothe JJ’s worried face.

“Meg and Maya have both watched Jack, Jennifer. They are very responsible.” Haley reassured the new mother as she slipped her coat back on.

“It’s nothing personal, I swear, its just the first time we’ve been out.” JJ explained.

“It’s going to be fine. We’ll have fun, you’ll have fun. Go, get some adult time.” Meg tried to escort the six adults out of the house.

“Yeah, we should get going if we want to make the reservation.” Hotch glanced at his watch. JJ kissed Henry one last time as he lay sleeping in his car seat bucket. Emily gave the sitters one last wilted smile as she led her girlfriend back outside. Kate and Chris were the last ones to slide into their car behind Hotch’s large SUV.

“Was I ever that clingy?” Kate asked amused.

“Worse.” Chris answered, glancing in his mirrors. That earned him a swat to his meaty upper arm.

Nov. 22 6:26am

Derek always seemed to keep the heat at the coldest possible setting overnight, which sent Penelope cringing as she made an early morning bathroom stop. She snuggled back into her silk robe as she shuffled toward his kitchen to start the coffee pot. He had yesterday’s mail out on the counter and she may have started sifting through it as she waited for the gentle hiss of heating water and gurgle of brewing coffee. Ads from a gym and a car detailer were ignored, her man was perfect, thank you very much.

There was an open letter from some pretentious sounding company and she really couldn’t keep her fingers from releasing it from the confines of its envelope.

Final Notice:

Mr. Derek Morgan,

This is the last time we will be contacting you. Your lease is concluded as of November 30, 2017 and the property has since been sold. Please ensure you have made appropriate arrangements to have your property removed from the building by no later than Friday December 1, 2017.

Regards,

Matthew Hausenweir, landlord

Solutions Quartered, Inc.

“Baby Girl?” Derek called as he pulled on a pair of sweatpants from the bottom drawer of his dresser. Penelope squeaked as she shoved the letter back into its trifolded form, earning herself a papercut in the process of trying to hide her snooping. Derek found her sheepishly sucking on her ring finger. “What’d you do now?” He slipped his arms around her waist, pulling her in to inspect her wound.

“Nothing, I’m fine. Did I wake you?” Penelope nuzzled against Derek’s neck.

“Penelope? I know you don’t think I left my mail covered in blood.”

“Blood? Weird, I must have brushed it and gotten a papercut.”

“Brushed a letter that was stacked on the other side of the counter? Girl I know you.” Derek grinned, leaving teasing kisses on either side of her neck. She stomped her feet and huffed.

“Fine! I was reading your mail. Whatever. You! You should be packing. You need to be out by next week.”

“Is that so?” Derek gave her a blasé glance. “And what if I have nowhere to move to?”

“Uh, my place, duh. Derek Morgan, I don’t know how you teach kids when you don’t see the obvious in front of your face. We can finally stop having overnight bags and just live together!”

“Are you sure? I was going to ask you with flowers and things.”

“Oh, still do that. All the flowers and things. But my answer will be yes, because then I can finally not freeze to death at night.”

Derek barked a laugh, “Well, I hope there’s more to moving in together than just control of the thermostat.”

“It’s one of the many perks.” Penelope grinned up at him, pointing to her cheek so he would kiss her again.  She stood on her tip toes in his kitchen and reveled in the fact that every morning would be like this. Waking up with her love and making coffee.

What more could a girl ask for?

Nov. 27 7:02am

Luke had started worrying about another slight against F.B.I since their defeat of New Canaan in the football play offs. The week-long break over Thanksgiving would have been a perfect opportunity for another form of vandalism or theft. He pulled into his usual spot in the staff parking lot and began surveying the grounds for any signs of misdoings. His breath puffed in front of him as his dress shoes crunched against the frost lined sidewalk.

Matt Simmons was sitting in his car a few spots down, listening to NPR and finishing his first cup of coffee for the day. Luke looked like he was looking for something which caused Matt to hurry up his morning routine.

“Everything okay?” Matt called out as he grabbed his briefcase and messenger bag from the back seat of his two-door coupe.

“Yeah, so far.” Luke answered, nodding with his jaw set in concern.

“Thinking something went down over break?” Matt added his eyes to the patrol, his long legs quickly caught up to the soccer coach.

“Call it a hunch,” Luke sighed, shoving his hands in the pockets of his khakis. “You ever wonder why this rivalry started?”

Matt tilted his head noticing a distinct shift in Luke’s posture and phrasing. “I figured it was one of those long running old boys club things, a ‘your dad beat my dad at polo and now you’re in for it’ type of thing.”

Luke grinned at the example, damn it was easy talking to Simmons. “Maybe, at some point, but the egging, the theft of the Submarine, that’s only been going on this year.”

“No shit. Why now?” Matt asked, knowing Luke was building up to something.

Luke didn’t say anything, he just stopped in front of the main doors. He worried his jaw before he finally came clean. “Because I took the job here.”

“What? You used to work there?” Matt didn’t remember hearing anything about Luke’s previous schools, in particular. He had a memory for details and now wondered if he missed something about his fellow new teacher.

“Phil Brooks, the football coach? He’s my, uh, ex,” Luke cleared his throat, holding the door for Matt to get out of the cold.

“This is all the case of a jilted lover?!” Matt’s mouth puckered ruefully for Luke. “Tough break man. You dump him for the job?”

“Well, no, not exactly, but I think that’s what he took away from me moving.” Luke explained, heading towards the kitchen and Rossi’s famous espresso. “Look, I’m not exactly out here, but with everything that the school has had to face, because of me—”

“Look, you did not ask for any of this. I won’t say anything, this was strictly off the record.”

“Hey, thanks, I’m just trying to figure out how to hash it all out with Hotch.”

“Good luck, but hopefully they’ll come to their senses and stop playing dirty.” Matt suggested, he adjusted his bag on his shoulder before heading toward the stairwell. “See you later, Luke.”

Luke nodded, his thoughts swarming inside his head as he went to grab a latte from the Chef.

Nov. 30 9:38am

Jordan made her way to the office to check her mailbox during her prep period. She had done well this year and kept her opinions to herself, after the mess last year she had been holding her breath constantly. Ashley was leaning over her desk purposely making small talk with Grant as he vacuumed. Jordan shook her head, that woman knew full well he didn’t want to talk and couldn’t hear her anyway.

“Morning Ashley,” Jordan gave her a look before walking to the wall of trays.

“Jordan, hi! Hey, did you know that Luke Alvez helped Grant, here, clean up after the egging fiasco?” The blonde smirked as the poor custodian blushed with the women gossiping.

“Well its good to see there still some good old fashioned hard work and kindness out there.” Jordan admitted.

“And he’s so handsome too. Can’t imagine anyone who wouldn’t want to snatch him up.”

“Oh no, Ashley, no. Leave the poor boy be.” Jordan warned, thinking she meant for herself.

“What? Please.” Ashley sat back, settling into her well-worn seat. “I’m not quite his type, I’ll have you know.” She made eyes at Grant who was trying desperately to finish his tasks and escape this uncomfortable scenario for good. He had his head down, but the vacuum was off, so he certainly could hear their continuing conversation. Jordan was now on the same page.

“He has got a lot of free time now that soccer season is over with.” Jordan admitted after an awkward pause. “And that’s all I am going to say. If a certain single guy wanted to ask him out, he would probably have a nice time.”

Ashley and Jordan watched Grant wheel the vacuum out of the office and let the beveled glass door slowly close behind him.

“Do you think he is going to do it?” Ashley gushed while twirling a pen into her cheek.

“He’s going to be adamant about not doing it for a good few weeks. That’s why we need to hope Mr. Alvez does it for him.” Jordan smirked.

Dec. 5 12:43pm

Michel didn’t want to walk to the other side of the school to use the staff bathroom, like they had been doing for the past three and a half years. The lunch hour had just begun, so they figured if they ducked into the guys’ bathroom they wouldn’t be intruding on anyone. Michel hadn’t counted on someone who wasn’t paying attention to the class schedule at all. He was in the back of the room, sat on the floor opposite the stalls, vaping.

“Whoa, sorry, uh, do you mind if I—?” Michel asked.

“Piss? Be my guest.” Jake shrugged, he was dazed and staring at the ancient ceiling tiles. Michel made their way to a stall and took care of business, trying not to over think the situation. Washing their hands, they finally caught a whiff from whatever Jake was smoking, it definitely wasn’t jasmine.

“I can’t believe you right now.”

“Yeah, well, I wasn’t expecting you here either.” Jake muttered, standing and tucking his pipe back in his pants’ pocket.

“Don’t you have Mr. Alvez this hour?” Michel spun, challenging Jake, despite the height difference and all that had passed between them.

“Yeah, I do. Sorry, Mom but I skipped Spanish today. Don’t think she would really care, since I have been speaking it longer than English.” Jake dusted his pants off as Michel gaped at him.

“Why are you being like this?” Michel’s voice was so soft it wasn’t meant to be heard. Jake’s inhale and flaming eyes caught Michel in the mirror before they could turn away.

“Just making everything easier.” Jake spat.

“For who?”

“I don’t know, everyone? You don’t want me like I want you, Michel. Might as well keep the lines clear from here on out.” He was hurt, it was oozing through his tough guy exterior. Michel turned and finally took in the state of the boy in front of them. How much they had affected Jake since breaking off his kiss backstage all those weeks ago.

“You know I hate distinctions like that. Nothing is ever one or the other.” Michel countered, leaning against the wall, refusing to let Jake out of the conversation now.

“Yeah, well, maybe this isn’t about making you comfortable. Maybe this is about trying not to break down while I watch you flirt with Iggy next hour or help Cissy with her Bio homework.”

Michel eyes pinched, finally taking in how much Jake saw them in every situation. The actor in them craved the spotlight, but the focused attention of someone was jarring. Especially when it wasn’t unwanted. They shook their head trying to find the words for what they wanted to say.

“I don’t want you in pain, Jake, you have to know that.”

“Doesn’t exactly feel like it, Michel.” He was still stoned, but he swung his arms to do something besides just stand there.

“Kissing me-- you caught me off guard, I had no idea you liked me. Not like that. Well, especially since I’m not exactly a guy.”

“You’re beautiful Michel, no matter how you dress or if you wear makeup or not. Look I am as gay as I ever was, but I’m not blind. We’ve been friends too long for you to think I want you to be something you’re not.” Jake had somehow started comforting Michel, why was this so confusing? Michel walked closer, glancing at the door as the noise from the cafeteria increased.

“You scared me.” Michel whispered, tucked within an embarrassed laugh. “I have spent so many years declaring my identity that I hadn’t really accepted my sexuality. I guess, with my father, parents, I just hadn’t brought it up. You know? I’m enough of a burden.”

Jake ran his hand through his hair, his heart breaking again, knowing the pain of being yourself and having no way of satisfactorily expressing it. “You’re not a burden, Michel. If you’re not ready to date or not sure if you like guys—why didn’t you just say something?”

“Because, its you. I never wanted to lose you. You’ve been one of the few people who I can just click with, you know?” Michel’s eyes were glistening now, Jake gave them a half smirk.

“Kind of backfired, don’t ya think?” Jake held out his hand and intertwined his knuckles with Michel’s, arms lengths apart, connecting and calming each other. “Is this okay? Are we going to be able to figure this out?”

Michel sniffled, “Are you going to stop smoking in the boys’ room?” They both laughed at the reference, Jake drew Michel to his chest. They stood there holding each other in the middle of the school day in the entry way of the restroom for a heartbeat. Jake kissed his friend’s head, breathing in their scent before letting go.

“You should get some lunch, I’ll call you later.”

“You coming to English?” Michel asked assertively. Jake nodded, a satisfied yet cocky look on his face.

Dec. 7 4:18pm

Spencer Reid was appreciating the end of fall as the bare trees billowed in an afternoon breeze. The skeletal forms were reminders of change and not a depressing sight to the science teacher. He had driven this route for the majority of his time teaching at the Institute and was still glad he had found the scenic drive in the first place. He didn’t need to rush home, but he could if he needed to. It was nearly dark, and he had a long night ahead of him between his usual Thursday night NA meeting and grading labs.

He couldn’t help but smile as he pulled into the driveway, he could see the cat watching him from the window, fuzzing up the back of the couch. He leaned down and grabbed his satchel and his stack of folders from the passenger’s seat. Someone was burning leaves in the distance, the scent locked into his mind as a Virginia phenomenon as he hadn’t experienced as a desert native. Rationally, he knew it was a common practice wherever deciduous trees were abundant. Spencer slammed the car door shut and double checked the lock before strolling to the front door, it was robin’s egg blue with gold accents.

Voices rolled from the living room, laughter and the television melding together.

“Spencer’s home! How was your day, honey?” Diana cackled from her recliner in the living room.

“Good!” Spencer wiggled his nose before kicking off his Chuck Taylor’s on the mat. “How are my girls doing today?” he called back.

“You get your card skills from your mother, don’t you?!” Elle accused from the couch.

“Uh-oh, what happened?” Spencer’s brow pinched as he ducked his head around the half-wall where his mother and his girlfriend were watching a telenovela.

“She cheats, just like you!” Elle pointed at both the Reids before shaking her head.

“Mom?” Spencer raised his eyes at Diana, she bit her lip and shrugged. “Mom!”

“Oh don’t give me that look, Spencer. I had to cheat to beat you as a kid and now it’s the only way I know how to play.”

“What were you playing?” Spencer plopped down next to Elle and put his arm around her on the back of the couch.

“Bridge.”

“Well, I hope the stakes were high enough to warrant such dubiousness.” Spencer’s jaw pitched forward as Elle gave him an unamused look.

“Don’t encourage her.”

“What? I’m not!” He feigned shock. She pinched his side, doubling him over.

“Hey, you two, old lady here. Leave room for the Holy Spirit.” Diana teased, turning up the sound on the television.

“Mom, you can’t use piety as an excuse as an atheist.”

“And why can’t I? I’m your mother, I’ll do as I please.” Diana huffed, hiding a half smirk. “And I am going to go finish dinner, so you kids can be off to your meetings.” She not so subtly left the couple alone for a few welcoming kisses. Spencer hummed into Elle’s mouth.

“Was she really that bad?”

“I don’t even think she knows the rules, Spencer, I swear.” Elle giggled as he tucked her hair behind her ear. “What?”

“Just happy to see you.” Spencer’s brown eyes turned puppy dog and his hand sneaked up her thigh.

“Still not very smooth there, Dr. Reid,” Elle rolled her eyes before straightening his tie. “How much grading do you have tonight?”

Spencer sighed, “Not so much.” Elle knew by the tone of his voice that he was flubbing his answer.

“Go get started, can’t have you up until midnight again,” Elle pointed to his desk in the office across the house.

“Just one more?” Spencer leaned down sheepishly. Elle groaned, letting him kiss her neck before pushing him on to the floor.

“Homework, go!”

Next Chapter: Private Lives

@mentallydatingspencerreid @dontshootmespence @ultrarebelheart @lyrasilverroseelizabethamanti @cynbx @rikersgirl22 @pllfrommars @wheresthewater  @darknesstoglowing @adropintheocean1234567 @tleighstone12 @unitchiefwives @sam-carter-in-training @prettyboysjello @ddreammcatcher @thegirlinflames  @night–hawk @t25luver @onlyalittleteenwolfobsessed @thismiss02 @literallyprentissstwin @usercorgis @natalie-fangirl @holding-on-to-francis @nikkipea @alisonxnguyen @nsanchez1992

[sodoyouknowbts]

Taehyung x Reader - One Night Stand (Eleven)

Part of the ‘Married to You’ Series.

Summary: A one night stand with Kim Taehyung turns into something you never would’ve expected.

Pairing: Taehyung x Reader

Genre: Romance, Drama, Arranged Marriage

Author: Moxie

Chapters: 01 & 02 | 03 | 04 | 05 | 06 | 07 | 08 | 09 | 10 | 11 | 12 (The Finale)

Chapter Eleven

Taehyung pulls the car up into the driveway and turns off the engine. He glances at Anna, who is currently asleep in the passenger seat and sighs, leaning his head back against the head-rest and rubbing the bridge of his nose with his fingers.

Tonight was a bloody mess

Everything had gone to shit. He didn’t know how things had gotten out of hand and ended up the way they did. He had everything planned out too.

Taehyung resigns himself and opens the door, slipping out. He walks over to the passenger side and helps Anna out but she’s still asleep so he carries her in his arms and up the stairs to her apartment.

She’s gotten lighter he thinks to himself “She’s a lot lighter compared to you” he shakes his head and dismisses the thought as soon as it enters his head. Why the hell was he thinking about you right now?

Once he reaches the door he gently shakes Anna and when she wakes up he gently places her back on her feet. She stumbles drunkenly and enters the pin, haphazardly throwing open the door and kicking off her heels. Taehyung follows behind and closes the door, slipping off his shoes and placing her discarded heels in a line next to her slippers.

He watches as Anna sways on her feet unsteady. Not wanting her to fall and hurt herself Taehyung reaches out and steadies her, his arm around her waist. 

“Anna, did something happen?” he asks concerned. “This isn’t like you”

Anna glances down at the floor and then back up to him, a small smile on her lips, her eyes glistening. “Tae…do you think I’m beautiful?”

Her question is out of the blue and catches Taehyung off guard. “Of course you are” he replies.

What’s going on? he thinks to himself.

A single tear slips down her cheek. “They cut my contract Tae. They said I’m getting too old and that they want someone younger…someone fresher. Am I too old?”

It was a shock to hear that Anna had been let go by the store. She had been their model for three years, before she moved to the states and they had happily taken her back when she returned. In fact they were the main reason why she came back. Now to find out that they were dropping her… Taehyung could understand her actions tonight.

“Anna you’re as beautiful as you ever were and you’re not old. That’s ridiculous. You don’t need them there are plenty more opportunities for you. Don’t lose hope, you know I’ll be there to help support you” he hoped his words could comfort her.

Smiling Anna lifts her hand up and strokes his cheek. “Thank you Tae. I can always count on you to take care of me”. Her eyes lock with his and they stare at each other in silence. Slowly she leans in closer, bringing her lips towards his, closing her eyes. He can feel her breathe on his skin.

Their lips touch and Taehyung brings up his hand, placing it over hers and grasping her fingers as she caresses his cheek. He closes his eyes.

–

The car ride is silent. 

After you had stopped crying Jay had gone back inside and grabbed your bag. He didn’t mention Taehyung and Anna and you didn’t ask, even though a part of you was curious if he had decided to take her home or not.

You had your head resting in the palm of your hand, which was propped up against the window, your eyes staring aimlessly out the window.

The radio was on and a man was singing about a lost lover. The soft melody flowed throughout the car, filing the silence with his sweet voice.

How fitting you think to yourself bitterly as you listen to the lyrics.

As if sensing your discomfort Jay quickly reaches for the control and changes the station. The sweet melody is replaced by an upbeat dance track. His eyes remain focused on the road the entire time and he acts casual. You send him a small smile in silent thanks which he sees from his peripheral vision.

You turn your attention back to your window and that’s when you notice that you were currently driving away from the city and towards the hills. 

“Jay, where are we?” you ask sitting up straight in your seat. You glance at the surrounding in confusion, not recognising anything.

“Don’t worry, we’re almost there” Jay replies mysteriously. He glances at you and smiles reassuringly as if to say “trust me”. 

You relax back in your seat and decide to take his word. A few minutes later you notice something coming into view and as you drive closer and pull into the parking lot you realise where you are. The observatory.

You had always wanted to come here but could never find the time. It was strange that Jay happened to bring you here now. It was like he could see into your heart and read your desires.

“What are we doing here? It’s closed now” you ask as Jay pulls the car into a parking spot and begins to unbuckle his seat belt. He avoids your question.

“Come on, trust me” he jumps out and you follow behind, curious as to what he had planned.

He walks towards the entrance and you’re surprised when he pulls out a key from his jacket pocket and unlocks the door, effortlessly. He holds the door open for you and you enter, trying to see through the dark.

You hear movement to your side as the door shuts and Jay shuffles around. Suddenly the entire place is lit up as Jay finds the light switch and turns them on. You blink your eyes rapidly, trying to adjust to the change.

You follow Jay as he leads you through a corridor, the walls lined with images of outer space and rocket ships and find yourself walking through a door which leads to the observatory deck.The late night wind caresses your skin as you take in the view.

You’re high up above the ground, standing outside on the deck which had a full 360 view of the night sky. You gasp in awe at what you see. From this height the stars appeared brighter than ever, as if they were twinkling and dancing in the night sky. It was beautiful.

Standing there amongst the stars you felt small and weightless. You had always loved the stars and astrology, ever since you were a child. Whenever your mind was troubled you would go outside and stare at the stars. It always made you feel like a small speck of dust in the greater universe and there was nothing that brought things into perspective more than that. The things you do today or tomorrow are minuscule in the grand scheme of things.

You turn to Jay, who is standing silently beside you “How is it that you seem to know me so well?” you ask, more to yourself than to him.

“You know…Taehyung cares about you more than he lets on” you’re caught off guard by Jay’s comment and you turn to stare at him. His eyes are focused on the night sky as he continues to talk. “He doesn’t show it, but he cares”.

Your heart constricts at the mention of Taehyung’s name. The pain still raw.

You choose not to answer, knowing that words couldn’t express the mess of emotions you were feeling at the moment. You also knew that talking about Taehyung would make you cry again.

You both stand sit there in silence, letting time slip past you. As you stare at the sky your thoughts begin to wander and you reflect on everything that has happened until now. From finding out you were pregnant to just now, when Taehyung confessed that he only married you to protect his career.

In the grand scheme of things your feelings for Taehyung didn’t matter. You were going to be a mother soon and you had a life growing inside of you. You place your hand on your stomach and speak silently to your child.

I haven’t been very good, have I? I’ve been too caught up with my own feelings instead of looking out for you. I’m sorry.

You feel yourself developing a new resolve. 

“Jay, I’ve decided” you begin to speak feeling a sense of determination crash over you like a wave “I’m going to move out of his house”.

–

3 weeks later

You close your eyes and raise your head to the sky, feeling the warmth of the sun bathe your skin. Your fingers brush against the strands of grass as you spread your arms out beside you as you slowly walk.

You were currently standing in an open field.

After that night Jay had driven you home so you could pack. and not wanting to bump into Taehyung you had packed only the essentials in an overnight bag. The rest of your things, Jay had picked up and brought over afterwards.

You had to admit it was hard leaving. You had so many memories in that house, good and bad but most of all it was hard to leave Taehyung.

The first few days he was all you would think about, however as more time went by it grew more bearable. You were determined to get your feelings under control, after all you had to get along with each other if you were to both raise a child together.

At the thought of your child you place a hand on your round belly. You could no longer fit into any of your old pants and now mainly wore loose dresses. The current one you wore was white and long, almost reached the floor. It was made out of a soft cotton material that swayed with the wind and moved as you walked, giving it the illusion that it was dancing. 

You had been on the farm for three weeks now and every one was lovely. When you had arrived Jay had shown you around and introduced you to the caretakers, a lovely middle aged couple you called Mr and Mrs Jiang. They were sweet and welcoming and they reminded you of your own parents, so you quickly grew close to them. You had to admit that when Jay told you he knew the perfect place for you to get away you did not expect that you would end up on at a farm. After all you couldn’t picture Jay owning a farm. 

The compound was small but it was well maintained. It consisted of a main family house with four bedrooms and a study, which surprisingly had a desktop computer, to large barns for the animals, a chicken coup and a large paddock that opened out into a gorgeous open field. During the last week, whilst on one of your many your daily walks, you had discovered that the if you walked for ten minutes you came along a river. Sometimes, if the weather was nice, like today, you would bring a book with you or pack a picnic and sit by the river.

 Your days passed by idly and you settled into a routine. In the morning you would rise and help out Mrs Jiang prepare breakfast and lunch for the workers. You would pick the eggs from the chicken coup and fetch milk from the cows.

In the afternoon you would either help out Mrs Jiang with her chores or help out around the farm with simple tasks like brushing the horses and at night you would relax in your room with either one of the many books from the library or with your laptop.

The farm was about three hours from the city so you visited the local doctor for your check-ups instead of going to see Park oppa. You still spoke to Park oppa on the phone every now and then and update him on how Bean was doing, who was healthy and normal according to your last check-up.

You also made sure to send daily updates to Taehyung’s manager on the status of the baby. Just because you were currently avoiding him didn’t mean that you were going to cut him out of your child’s life. You wanted him to be a part of it as much as you were.

–

“So how’s life as a country bumpkin?”

You shoot Jay a sarcastic look from the corner of your eye as you reach into the takeaway bag for another chicken drumstick.

He had driven down to visit you and as always brought takeaway from your favourite restaurant. You had read somewhere on the internet that you should avoid consuming excess grease and fried food during your pregnancy but you couldn’t help yourself, their fried chicken was the best. 

You were both currently sitting on a picnic blanket, which you had borrowed from Mrs Jiang and brought along as you sat by the river. You were happily eating the chicken as Jay filled you in on his week and asked how you and Bean were doing.

“Hard. I never realised how much farmers actually have to do. It feels like I’m constantly doing something” you reply wiping some sauce off from your chin with a napkin. “I’m also really tired nowadays”.

“Hows the little man doing?” Jay reaches a hand towards your stomach and you smack it away with the back of your hand.

“Girl. The little girl is doing fine. She’s healthy and normal, which is great news” you correct him. Though to be honest you weren’t sure what gender Bean was. The doctor had asked you at your last ultrasound if you wanted to know the gender, and as much as you did, it didn’t feel right without Taehyung being there, so you had respectfully declined. 

“Sorry, sorry girl. Have you told Taehyung?”

You avert your gaze sheepishly.

“Don’t tell me you’re still ignoring him? How long do you plan on doing this for?”

You knew Jay was right but you still didn’t like hearing it. “I know, I know. I just..I still need a bit more time” you reply.

“Time for what?”

You know you can’t avoid Jay’s questions forever so you decide to tell him the truth. “To get over him. I’m tired of having an unrequited love. It’s draining. It hurts every time I see him knowing that he doesn’t feel the same”

“But what if he does?” Jay asks.

“He doesn’t, trust me. I thought he did but you saw how he was that night with Anna. It’s clear he still cares for her. I just….I’m tired of feeling like I’m the other woman. I just want a normal relationship where I’m not always second guessing myself and over thinking everything. Is that too much to ask?” you sigh in exasperation and flop down onto the blanket.

“Why couldn’t I have fallen in love with you? It would’ve been so much easier” you add turning your attention to Jay who bursts out into laughter and lays down beside you.

“Love is so complicated” he says once he stops laughing and you couldn’t agree with him more.

“Yeah, love sucks”.

To be continued

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