#how lisa loves her cats even after they die

[himbos-hotline]

you ever watch the simpsons and get hit with the human experience being to love things?

[honest-moth-of-silver-grove]

you know how you did bg3 types of yanderes, could you do that for castlevania? Like the trio and isaac, hector, dracula/lisa, carmilla, st. germain??

A/N: For reference, here is the one I did for BG3 villains, and here is the one I did for the BG3 Main Companions. Also, this is unedited as hell so if you see grammar mistakes, no you didn't. 

Castlevania Characters as Yandere! Types: 

Yandere! Trevor: 

Defensive. Calucative. Hardened. Trevor’s seen far worse than you, from humans and monsters alike. He knows the terror and the cruelty that lurks out there. He wants to shield you from it all, for as long as possible. He has this overwhelming need to prevent what happened to his family from happening to you. Even then, he knows your innocence won’t last; it couldn’t possibly. So long as you’re tied to him, you will know hardship. So as much as he babies you, and refuses to grant you complete independence, he is also distant, and frequently unaffectionate. In his line of work, people don’t die of old age; neither of you will be in the other’s life forever. Just let him love you the way he needs, when he asks for it, please. Everything else is so difficult in his life, you don’t want to add to that. Make yourself into the one piece of his life that is easy. And enjoy the easy while it lasts. 

Yandere! Sypha: 

Confident. Feisty. Unyielding. Sypha is always sure of herself. Everything she does, she does with 100% effort and full intent- your relationship is no different. From the moment she sees you, she’s sure she likes you, and she’s certain you like her. Any behavior that suggests otherwise on your part must simply be beginning relationship nerves. After all, she is a scholar and a Speak Magician. Her infectious optimism seeps out of her every pore. Her love for you knows no bounds, and she will not hesitate to throw herself into danger to prove it. I mean, she can conjure fire and ice instantaneously in her own two hands! Who wouldn’t want to be her partner?  Only some sort of complete and total asshole would try and turn her down, or worse, fight against her. She fights for what is right, and what is just. You wouldn’t fight against what’s just, would you? 

Yandere! Alucard: 

Intellectual. Sharp. Melancholic. Alucard is not a stranger to romance nor heartbreak. Losing the people closest to him has left him vulnerable, both emotionally and physically. Instead of processing his feelings, he bottles them up, until he can no longer bear their weight. He feels such pressure to remain composed, remain controlled, not animalistic, to go against the programming of half of his biology. At the same time, he is starving, desperate, and filled with an insatiable thirst for closeness. Such a complicated, disconsolate man, Alucard needs you to stay, more than anything. His life has been so lonely, and so hard; at times it feels like all he knows is loss and the cruel impossible whispers of desire. You need to stay. You need to choose him. He cannot take another heartbreak. It’s quite possible, given his role throughout history, that humanity wouldn’t survive another one of his heartbreaks either.  

Yandere! Isaac: 

Keen. Precise. Self-Righteous. Isaac has journeyed far on his quest for revenge, coming not only into a new land and new role but a new self as well. Gone is the former subservient, sacrificial lamb, who has risen into a stronger, wiser, seemingly benevolent king. Do not mistake this kindness for weakness, however. You must be either admirable or too kind-hearted to pose a genuine threat. Once you’ve caught his eye, prepare for an odd game of cat and mouse, you being the mouse of course. Isaac is not used to having friends, much less romantic companions. You must be patient as he learns the intricacies of your psyche. Surely, you must know he’s been analyzing it since you met? Be an honest, positive presence in his life, and he will keep you safe from all others who may do you harm. Treat him as the wise king he now sees himself as, and perhaps, he will ask you to be his queen. 

Yandere! Hector: 

Reclusive. Embittered. Suspicious. Hector has been forced to toughen up. Too late did he realize at the end of the road, that it is the people, not the zombies you command that can make or break a man. That is where you come in my dear. Following Lenore’s death, Hector’s purpose is up in the air, he is suddenly a puppet, free of its strings. He feels much wiser, but just as lonely. Hector cannot help but latch on to you, the first “normal” person to view him as human. He yearns for a simple quiet life, with a dog (a live one) and a partner to call his own. You’re perfectly plain, or perhaps, you’re just odd enough to make him look normal, and he relishes that. You have to understand that he can’t share much about his past. He can’t possibly tell you about his old life, no, no, no. He’s hiding it from you, hells, he’s hiding from it with you. He loves you dearly, he does. But he can’t trust you, not fully. A man with a history like his cannot truly trust anyone. 

Yandere! Dracula/Lisa: 

Nurturing. Captivated. Smothering. Dracula was not keen on humans before meeting Lisa; she bewitched him body and soul. And now the two of them have become enthralled by you. Dracula has learned the ‘other’ humans are not to be trusted, not with you, and certainly not with his wife. Lisa finds it unfortunate how she is no longer able to treat her former patients in Lupu, but she’s also incredibly thankful now that she has you to take care of! Ever the eager student, she still wants to learn so many things, and how wonderful of a practice dummy you are. Dracula is also eternally grateful that his wife will not be completely lonely; he knows how much helping her fellow humans means to her, and now that you’re here, Dracula no longer has to worry about keeping his wife (and by extension, you) to himself for eternity. 

Yandere! Carmilla: 

Prepared. Calculating. Cruel. Carmilla is a sadist at heart, there’s no denying it. She loves feeling the power she wields over all other people, humans, and vampires alike. For you to have caught her attention, surely you must be something special. Either you are particularly gifted in something she’s not (negotiations, necromancy, art, etc.) or you’re just so unbelievably precious, that she can’t help but want to steal you away for herself. She sees you as a possession, as a rare and beautiful gem, not a person. Even if she did ‘hear’ anything you had to say, she’d simply consider it further fodder to be used in manipulating you should it all come to that. She is not a woman who is denied, not by God, not by man, not by Dracula, and certainly not by you. Chin up, pet. Things could always be much worse. You could be thrown in the dungeons and left to rot. How lovely of Carmilla to instead treat you to more luxury than your kind could ever dare to deserve. For your continued safety, may I suggest showing a little gratitude? I mean it’s not like your life depends on it or anything. It does. 

Yandere! St. Germain: 

Wise. Inquisitive. Obsessive. St. Germain is a man who knows his mind. He knows a great deal about alchemy, and that alchemy, at the end of his days, will be his greatest work. That was of course, all before he met you. You opened up a whole side of him that he didn't know existed. Before you, his conquest was kings and courts; his acquaintances were mages and scholars! But now, in his effort to keep you from himself, you have become his conquest; his acquaintances are vampires and demons, all practitioners of dark magic. To him, it’s of little matter, so long as he can secure you, his one true love. To him, it’s the most important to have someone to share all his knowledge with, all that he’s achieved. To bask in the victory alone does not hold the same merit. He needs you at his side, he needs you to be invested in the great work. Without you, without your love, he fears he cannot achieve it. As such, he will do whatever it takes to get you by his side. And I do mean- whatever- it takes. 

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[muzzledjaw]

I have a lot of headcanons I've posted to @coffee4harper Discord server in the past couple hours and I was holdnto post them here so :]

💥TORCHWOOD💥

**Ianto James Bond Headcanons**

- Ianto has *atleast* five copies of his favourite James bond movies.

- Lisa started the "Jones. Ianto, Jones." Joke.

- After the events of the season 1 finale, ianto had been referred to as 007 multiple times.

- After Ianto's death, Jack went to every opening night showing of a James bond film, then went to Ianto's grave to tell him about it.

- Ianto use to have a framed picture of every James bond actor in his childhood room.

//

**Torchwood Social Medias**

During slow days at work, the team goes on:

*Owen* - Reddit. He absolutely loves Reddit and frequents many subreddits

*Tosh* - YouTube. She probably watches in depth YouTube tutorials on both things she's interested in so she can learn, and things she already knows to silently judge

*Ianto* - Tumblr. He's not very active, but he does some scrolling during slow days in the tourist office.

*Gwen* - Instagram. She comments on every one of Rhys' posts and watches instagram reels.

*Jack* - do you really think this man knows how to use social media? Owen probably made him download snapchat and got him hooked on the fitters like every grandparent

Owen's reddit account was also linked to his torchwood email

//

The team once came into the hub really late to find Jack sleeping on the couch under the "TORCHWOOD" sign hugging ten's hand jar

//

One of the last things the face of bo sees is a suited figure crouching down infront of him and just holding him. He can't remember the figure's face, or who it is, but the face of bo feels safe to die, knowing he's in this unknown figure's arms

//

Jack reaches out to ianto's sister after the days of miracle day and offers finance support to her until the day she dies, saying ianto would've wanted his family to be safe. This continues for generations, until eventually the children are stopped being told of their late relative Ianto and the odd man who gives them so much money in his name

//

Owen fucking loves Melanie Martinez - specifically Cry Baby

//

Sometime in season 2, Jack once again started feeling guilty about suddenly leaving Torchwood for the Doctor for like a year, so he surprised Ianto with a spontaneous road trip. They drove across Wales for a week and it was one of the last peaceful moments the two ever had

//

**Post Death**

Owen's spirit haunted Dash-Con

After the events of House If The Dead, Ianto's spirit ended up at Canary Warf. Tourists and people who work in the area often talk about the suited Welshman who sits at the fountain all day, everyday, waiting for a woman to arrive

Tosh's spirit, somehow, ended up in Glasgow. She haunts Torchwood 2 and helps old Archie with tech. Archie doesn't realise she's a spirit. He's just happy to have company and someone to help him with all the email stuff

//

Mitski became popular and Jack locked himself in his office for a week straight and sobbed to her songs, thinking about ianto and all he lost in the past few years. He made sure to keep her music safe until his face of bo era. He never played miski for the guests of his events. She was just for him and his cat maid

//

The doctor's hand was destroyed in the torchwood bomb, and after learning about it, Jack just sobbed. He's lost tosh, Owen, and ianto. And now, he can't even keep track of the doctor. He's lost in his eternal life with nothing. This later leads to his decision to leave earth

//

Jack absolutely loved the x-men comics when they were first released, and when X-Men First Class was released he'd watch it on repeat imagining him and his team in place of the characters. The roles would shift around sometimes, but Jack always sees himself as Charles Xavier

//

Jack had a fling with Wilfred Owen during WW1. He keeps original copies of the man's work close to him. After Ianto's death, he donated what he could scavenge of the papers to the London Archives, not wanting anymore reminders of the men he loved that died too young

//

After CoE, and realising she never actually knew Ianto, Gwen sat Jack down with a cup of tea and asked him to tell her everything he could about the real Ianto before his funeral. Jack just.. sighed.. and said to gwen, "he was many things" and never explained further

//

Before the coffin was closed, Jack started a stopwatch and placed it in Ianto's hand. Like the ring that John threw in with Jack when he was forced to bury Jack alive, the stopwatch was a tracker with a special battery to allow it to run for centuries. When he felt lonely, Jack would check on the tracker, just to know that ianto was still there and the stopwatch was still ticking away, timing their time apart. He was not ready for the day he checked on the tracker and the screen was blank

//

(Based off that one scene in greys anatomy) after the service, Jack and gwen found a quiet spot to sit, and Jack just burst into laughter. And because Jack was laughing, Gwen was laughing. And they laughed together until it morphed into a comfortable silence between them as they held eachother

//

Ianto was buried with a sobriety coin in his pocket. Only Jack knows about this.

[stuck-in-jelly]

Maybe I’m delusional but I cant be the only one who believes that the “Rise Again” short story is a parallel to what must’ve happened when Lisa realized what Viren “had to do” to save their son.

Pretty consistently we see that Claudia is a parallel to her father meanwhile more subtly we see Soren as a parallel to his mother.

I believe it is strongest in the scene where Soren makes the decision to runaway and he tries to ask Claudia to come with him. Claudia shakes her head overwhelmed with whats going on and begging Soren to not make her choose between him and their father, much like when their parents asked her to choose which parent she’d stay with.

And so, just like their mother, Soren chooses for Claudia. Telling her goodbye.

I feel like it is especially reinforced with these images.

With that established i want to clarify my thoughts on exactly what happened to Soren when he was a kid.

I know a lot of people believe Soren didn’t actually die and instead was just really sick and about to die but between the symbolism of being turned to stone=death and how whatever spell he did crossed a line even his Mentor wouldn’t to the point of getting into a physical altercation I believed Soren actually died.

It seems to me that to at least to some degree this was resurrection. But why it didn’t require a blood of his child?

Soren was young and small and probably not dead for very long unlike Viren who had been dead for TWO YEARS.

But now onto ‘Rise Again’.

Of course the spell Claudia used wasn’t as strong as bringing something to life. She didn’t actually bring back a dead cat she was just animating cat ashes into the form of the cat she loved but regardless other she and Soren treat it as if the ashes were truly the cat and not a puppet Claudia made. But these snippets stuck out the most to me

If we take this short story as a parallel of their parents after Soren’s death/near death I feel like the language paints a good picture of how it went:

Viren:

“- I know but I fixed it.”

“It wasn’t fair that [he] died. [He] wasn’t even that old.”

Lisa:

“We had a little ceremony remember?”

“Because [Soren] died.”

But I think the biggest one is this scene:

[mermaidsirennikita]

Okay but now I need you to tell the best breakfast, lunch and dinner guy books you have read

Well, I should say that wildly enough enough soon after I made that comment about Leo Hathaway he literally told Catherine he must have her for breakfast, lunch, and dinner, sooooo

(He also proposed to her twice on the ride home lmao I forgot how many times he popped the question and she went "NO" or begged off lol.)

Ummmm otherwise:

Historicals:

Devil in Winter by Lisa Kleypas. While I think Leo edges him out, we do need to acknowledge that Sebastian is real into it. The scene where Evie literally wakes up to him heading down is so good, and of course there's the wall scene.

Suddenly You by Lisa Kleypas. Jack Devil literally adds strawberries to the menu. Which is very controversial among Kleypas readers, and people need to, ah, get over it. Grow up. Be an adult!!!

Scandalous Desires by Elizabeth Hoyt. Another wall "hold your skirts for me" scene that we don't discuss ENOUGH. Charming Mickey, dude! Thief of Shadows also has Winter learn about it for the first time as he is Untouched and be like "I SHALL CONQUER THIS" (he does).

Charlotte and The Seductive Spymaster by Grace Callaway. Grace heroes.... go for allllll of it. And I would say this hero ESPECIALLY. I mean, he's literally eating butter sauce off this woman. Glory and The Master of Shadows also has the amazing scene where Wei literally can't wait for it and does it while Glory's parents are within earshot.

Heartbreaker by Sarah MacLean. Clayborn is abooout iiiiit. He does a "good girl" during, he hops her on top of him, it's a good time.

When the Duke Was Wicked by Lorraine Heath. Rum on lips. Enough said.

The Duke Gets Even by Joanna Shupe. Lockwood.... may be outstandingly about it lol. At one point he's literally like "if I died doing this to her, I would die SO happy".

Something Fabulous by Alexis Hall. Feel this should be mentioned though it's m/m, because Valentine is OBSESSED after he sees someone else doing it to Bonnie (chill people, it's well before they get together) and he's OBSESSED with the idea of doing it after. It's like. The first thing he ever does ever and he compares Bonnie to a flower, which. Hysterical. Something Spectacular also has a great scene where Orfeo tells Peggy right before "now you're going to find out why I'm renowned throughout Europe". HOT.

Hotel of Secrets by Diana Biller has another virginal hero who learns this and like, is obsessed. I love him, he's so strict.

Lady Isabella's Scandalous Marriage by Jennifer Ashley. Mac literally does this to Isabella DURING breakfast.

When a Girl Loves an Earl by Elisa Braden. Has a variation you don't see enough of in historicals, so we're gonna include it.

The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes by Cat Sebastian. Marian isn't into p in v because of trauma. This... is not a problem for Rob.

Contemporary(ish):

Alll of the Kings of Italy heroes by Mila Finelli (including Alessio and Giulio in the m/m book) are super about it. SUPER. MAJORLY. Never forget Enzo D'Agostino being like "oh my god I hate her she's so annoying" while also loudly saying during "I LOVE IT" to her. He's crazy.

The Player by Kresley Cole. I should mention that not only is this hero one of the most obsessive heroes I've ever read... He literally did STUDIES to learn how to be as good at making her happy as he possibly could.

New Camelot by Sierra Simone. Ash and Embry are both into it, but Embry is REEEEEEALLY into it. Like, goes in after he's done into it. (And is juuuust as into doing it to Ash.) Which is so special.

The Love Hypothesis by Ali Hazelwood, should mention because even though there's only one love scene it's long and good and he does the "returning to the scene of the crime" thing, which you never see in contemporary trad romance lol.

Managed by Kristen Callihan. Scottie is very scent-focused. That's all.

Run Posy Run by Cate C. Wells I feel I should mention because he's NOT originally, but after he comes to super value her pleasure he REEEEALLY is.

The Princess Trap by Talia Hibbert. Hero literally has an oral fixation. May be the best example of this lol.

Preferential Treatment by Heather Guerre. Hero is super subby and as such, this is naturally a BIG DEAL to him. There's one scene... dude.

Fantasy:

Bound to the Battle God by Ruby Dixon. DUDE. DUDE. YOU WON'T EVEN BELIEEEVE. Carved into my brain, omg.

Consort of Fire by Kit Rocha. Ash has to keep not one but two women happy. He does this with enthusiasm.

Paranormal:

Should mention that all of the werewolves in Immortals After Dark consider this to basically be a sacred rite that is like, the BIGGEST deal in their culture, basically lol. They worship matehood and it's every little werewolf boy's dream to find his mate and do this to her (or them in general, Kresley's mating bonds are not only het).

Ummm there's a thing in Dark Desires After Dusk where Cade and Holly stop every however many miles on an important road trip so that he can do it to her on the hood of the car.

Lothaire is ABOUT IT. And there is a very famous scene involving it lol.

Thronos in Dark Skye is a controversial hero but he does, again, return to the scene of the crime.

Sci-fi:

Should be mentioned that all of Ruby Dixon's Ice Planet Barbarians are like, never happier than when they're getting this done.

[mesillusionssousecstasy]

Girl, interrupted

Why I'm only seen this movie from 1999 now? Where I have been all this time.

There are incredible actors in it. And there is even Jared Leto in it (when he was so young).

And it's based on a book apparently.

Angelina plays her character so well, but I still don't understand which mental illness Lisa had.

Please Susanna how couldn't you not like/love Toby (it's fucking Jared Leto haha).

Poor Daisy and what happened to her. Did she really have a particular relationship with her father? Or lies from Lisa?

And what was Susanna mental illness too? To be a little rich girl finally?

Poor Ruby, leaving the cat in a mental hospital....

I don't understand when Susanna slept with the married man exactly? Before or after her boyfriend?

It was a really good movie.

Some quotes:

"- So what's you "Diag-nonsense"? (Lisa) - I have a borderline personality. (Susanna) - We are very rare, and we are mostly men." (Lisa)

"- Lisa thinks she's hot shit 'cause she's a sociopath." (Janet)

"- Then what's wrong with me, huh? What the fuck is going on inside my head? Tell me, Doctor Val. What's your "diag-nonsense"? (Susanna)

"- You are a lazy, self-indulgent, little girl who is driving herself crazy." (Valerie)

"- You changed the scenery, but not the fucking situation..." (Lisa)

"- Please. I didn't press shit. She was waiting for an excuse." (Lisa)

"- That I'll never know what it was like to be her, but I know what it's like to want to die. How it hurts to smile. How you try to fit in, but you can't. How you hurt yourself on the outside... to try to kill the thing on the inside. How the hell am I supposed to recover... When I don't even understand my disease? " (Susanna)

"- When you don't want to feel, death can seem like a dream." (Susanna)

[freewillacquired]

Yeah. That was dumb. Why did he bring up chocolate? Now he was going to be thinking about chocolate all day. "Sor-ry..." he apologized, and a moment later as she whacked him, he figured it was for putting chocolate into her head, too. Then again, Rain didn't necessarily need a reason if she wanted to bop him one. They had been through enough that if it made her feel better, even in some small way, Nemesis was all for it.

There were two different types of "good food" for Nemesis, the kind that actually kept him alive, and the kind that tasted good. To stay alive, he needed meat. That was fairly hard to come by nowadays, since undead flesh wasn't good enough and he wasn't about to start eating the few animals that had managed to survive to this point. The animal lover in him just wouldn't allow it. So he relied mostly on things like canned cat food and frozen meats, which were pretty scarce. And, of course, the kind that tasted good usually involved cookies, but also crackers, biscuits, granola bars, and other such things that, although stale, were still decent to eat.

"Mmmm.... Coooookieeees...." Nemesis happily growled. "I need to thind... neat too, though.... Like... throzen neat. Or canned... cat thood." He waited for her to inevitably be either grossed out or laugh before he sighed dejectedly. "Yeah... I know. This is... ny lithe now," he said. Who would have thought that after loving cats his whole life, he'd be eating their food. Not a good look for him.

Thinking back to his photography days made a nostalgic smile come to Nemesis' face, which... was only indicated by a wrinkle in his receded upper lip. "Yeah. Trees, a-ni-nals, in-sects... Any-thing that caught ny eye." It was fun and very peaceful hobby. Even if he had a camera now, he doubted he could even work it with his thick, stiff fingers. That was a sad thought.

Ever the optimist, Nemesis quickly latched onto Rain's words in agreement of her optimistic sentiment. "Ny ge-ner-al rule is... Ith you don't know... assune they're a-lithe," Nemesis said. On a realistic level, he knew his parents were dead. He knew his neighbors were dead. He even knew his dog, Pickles, was dead. But he hadn't actually seen any of them die, so in his mind there was always a chance. Lisa was the only one he knew for sure wasn't ever going to be found.

He shouldn't. He should not. But he simply could not resist. "Yeah... you need... only one. Child-sized," he said, holding his hands no more than six inches apart to denote the small size of the bed Rain would need. The joke was followed by a laugh as he waited to more than likely get whacked yet again.

"Yay, road trid!" he exclaimed with boyish excitement - rather terrifying coming from a large mutated being like him - as he pushed himself all the way onto the bed of Rain's truck and got situated. God, it's so nice to have a friend, to have someone to talk to, he thought. And to have a ghost from the past return in a state of being very much alive was an added dose of relief and happiness for a weary soul.

It was nice to go for a proverbial "ride in the car." No wonder dogs like this so much, Nemesis thought, thinking back to how excited Pickles used to get with the air whipping around as they rode in his Jeep. Sitting in the truck bed, Nemesis watched the world go by, inasmuch as it was a broken, desolate, deserted wasteland much of the time. Only the buildings seemed to bear some resemblance to how life used to be, but even they were dirty and beginning to fall into disrepair. The wind and the movement felt good, though, far better than always stomping through life at a snail's pace on foot. His tentacles seemed to be enjoying themselves too, undulating in the wind like streamers.

In a world ravaged by a virus that primarily creates monsters, nasty encounters are in no short supply. When Rain begins to hear heavy footfalls—when she feels them practically shaking the ground beneath her, she figures she's about to have another.

Cursing under her breath, she unholsters her gun.

The days were blending together in depressing ways now. Nemesis was shocked at how quickly things had gone to hell after the Hive and Raccoon City Incidents. It had taken him quite a while to regenerate after the city's "sanitation," but once he was on his feet again, he realized the gravity of what was happening to the world.

Alone and with nothing left to do in his current mutated state, Nemesis had taken to showing up at Umbrella facilities unannounced, and destroying as much of them as he could. The digital feed supplied by the retinal implant attached to his right eye and sewn up into his head gave him a lot of useful information, especially after his mind was liberated from Umbrella's control. May as well put it to good use, right?

He'd acquired more clothes and equipment this way, with the boots and leather trenchcoat-style getup being standard issues for a creature called a Tyrant, which he apparently now was. They seemed just about the only things that were going to fit his... unique body shape nowadays.

Learning about himself and destroying Umbrella assets were good pastimes, but Nemesis was extremely lonely. The few survivors he came across now and then either screamed and ran from him or shot at him. Bullet wounds were nothing more than annoying mosquito bites to him now, thanks to his thick hide, but even so... it was demoralizing. All he wanted to do was help. He was almost getting used to being alone all the time, by necessity rather than desire, until that unexpectedly changed. While exploring a city one day, he rounded a corner and-

"Raaaain!" Nemesis bellowed the moment he saw her, unable to contain his excitement upon seeing her. "Oh... ny god!" He couldn't believe his eyes. Well, eye. He still had two, but one was... indisposed. In a move that probably looked damn near ridiculous to the other, he lifted his hand... and waved to her. "I'n so glad... to see you! How... are you... alithe... right now?" he tried to ask, his massive chompers getting in the way, as usual.

Nemesis couldn't get his voice to be anything other than a monotone growl, and with monstrous teeth and a noticeable lack of lips, his speech was something of a garbled mess. It took him a while, but he'd learned to make certain sounds in other ways, using his throat and tongue. Essentially, he'd had to relearn how to speak. Some sounds and words, though, were lost forever. None of that did anything to curb his enthusiasm at seeing Rain alive, however. Was he finally losing his mind? Hallucinating, maybe? No, the target identification system is identifying her as Rain... Right now, Nemesis didn't care either way. Just the sight of her was one for sore eyes, since his last clear memory of her was being at death's door.

"I thought... the anti-thirus... didn't work...?" he said, his elation at seeing her alive completely overriding his common sense. Nemesis wasn't thinking about the fact that Rain wouldn't recognize him anymore, or about how negatively she would likely react to seeing the hulking beast before her. Not to mention his tentacles, rooted at the backs of his shoulders, which were excitedly coiling and undulating in their own right, reacting to his surprise and happiness. He batted one of them with his hand. "Cut it out...!" he admonished the obnoxious appendage. It recoiled temporarily before returning to its idle activities.

Then it dawned on him, especially with how she had her gun at the ready. Oh no... she has no idea who I am. "It's Natt," he said, laying his hand on his chest. "Natt... Ad-di-son." How pathetic is it that I can't even say my own name correctly anymore? he thought grimly.

[autismsubway-remade]

waitok. rottmnt headcanons GO.

donnie

autism + ocd (hes just like me for realsies)

trans/nb, bisexual (he/they/it prns)

hes YOUNGER THAN LEO (by 5 minutes. he figured it out w science stuff idk)

likes baking bc its like chemistry but you can eat ur experiments it w/out dying (usually)

stress baker

knows asl and a little bit of japanese (from splinter)

back/posture issues (worse after the kraang bc of shell damage)

chronic back pain...bones of an 80 yr old

mikey

adhd

agender + aroace (uses any pronouns but mostly he/she. none gender left boy is how he describes it)

has a deep interest in psychology and would pursue a career as a therapist if it wasnt for the whole. turtle thing

looks up to leo and thinks hes sooo cool until she turns like 12 and realizes oh hes kinda lame actually. still his idol though bc hes funny

besties w sunita ^_^ bc i said so. new sister acquired

likes watching raph knit

chronic pain after the kraang, as well as tremors

leo

adhd + autism

needs glasses like donnie but thinks they make him look like a nerd so he never wears them..hed rather be blind (until he eventually gets contacts that is)

is actually a nerd, just in denial

trans + gay (he/him)

the WORST flirter ever. so bad at it. absolutely abysmal. he gets zero bitches

is afraid of cold, dark spaces after the whole Kraang Fiasco

saw gram gram in the prison dimension for a bit b4 being rescued <3

knows the most languages (english, asl, spanish, japanese)

likes boxing

cried for an hour when casey jr accidentally called him dad

raph

anxiety + ocd

trans + biromantic asexual (he/they)

loves knitting <3 he makes his brothers and april new sweaters every year

stress knitter. it helps him calm down. after the kraang incident he knit so much that he ended up w 3 piles of scarves, blankets, sweaters and other various items. april donated some bc there were just So Many

watches donnie bake a lot and vehemently denies eating the raw dough (even when donnie catches him)

sometimes sees gram gram in his dreams

rly good at dancing actually

sleeps w a mountain of teddy bears. cries if he accidentally knocks one off the bed

april

adhd + anxiety

nb lesbian (she/they)

TWO GIRLFRIENDS (cassandra + sunita)

has a cat named mona lisa :] shes a calico and frequently hides in aprils backpack to sneak into the lair. donnies her second fav

has Eldest Sister Syndrome

literally the only hamato who actually knows how to take care of herself. frequently reminds her brothers to do that as well

HUGE gossip. w donnie specifically. she'll come over after work and shit talk customers/shitty co workers and he'll just listen and occasionally suggest manslaughter

lied abt being 18 to get a crane license </3

helps the brothers w their post kraang issues

cassandra

adhd

trans lesbian (she/her)

casey jrs biological mom despite saying she found him in the trash

named him after the greatest warrior she knows. herself

raphs bestie! he scruffs her like a cat when she gets too violent.

theyre vigilante buds! shes commited murder before

bit so many kraang zombies. claimed they tasted like bubblegum (they did not)

slightly feral, maybe rabid

actually scarily intelligent, she's just. a little insane

cried when she met casey jr. shes so proud of him

casey jr

So Much Trauma. All Of It. anxiety + ocd + autism

trans + questioning (no time for teen romance in the apocalypse, he/him)

once he gets more comfy w the turtles and family he stops w the sensei or master and starts calling them uncles ^_^ (leo is dad, casey + april + sunita r mom, draxum + splinter are grandpa and big mama is nana)

so many parental figures, watched them all die

the worst fashion sense known to man. its so bad its embarassing

very smart bc he was taught by future donnie, ended up just going to college immediately despite being like, ~15/16

very proud of his stubble :]

loves hockey! plays it w his moms

showers everyday once he figures out what showers actually are

cant sleep alone, if he wakes up alone he freaks out rly bad

good at cooking! not amazing, but good! was mostly joking about eating rats (thinks its funny)

[lavendermin]

if all stars fell at once (4) | xiao

pairing | xiao/reader

word count | 3.1k

genre | fluff, light angst, developing relationship, overall domestic

warnings | light smut, eventual smut

Routine.

Defined as habitual tasks you partake in on a regular basis. These monotonous daily routines are what provided a grasp of control amid the uncontrollable and brought you order in a time of uncertainty.

The dawn of a new day started with the bittersweet greeting of the mourning doves’ songs. It gently tugged your consciousness forward, your weary limbs stretching out beneath warm covers. Your eyes would peek open and be greeted by the same dull room, bed tucked in a far corner. The sheets over old furniture still haunted you, the house inherited by past ghosts of memories.

It was a husk you resided in, perhaps a tomb you inherited. And as with every morning, you push the thought away.

A quick wash-up and breakfast helps kickstart your day before you’re off to run any errands listed off in your mind already. Fresh morning dew still glistens on the grass when you leave.

Days where errands would carry you to the harbor would have their own side routine you knew fairly well. Checking Bubu Pharmacy for any medicine pickups for the village elders, a quick chat with Ganyu as you passed her during one of her duties, a passing stop to the markets by the docks for supplies, and the occasional prolonged stay for lunch per the invitation of Zhongli and his courteous acquaintance. Every week, just like clockwork.

The busy day would wind down near the docks, watching the waves as they crashed upon rocks and taking in the scent of the sea spray that swept by you with it’s breeze. If you closed your eyes, the sounds of the sea and bustling voices of the harbor would meld together into one— a comforting cacophony of background noise to keep you grounded before the harbor’s relentless energy swept you away.

The city was a little much for you. It made you miss the tranquility of the small place you resided in tucked far back in the village.

And so everyday your heels pointed back towards home, ending with a meal in between more work you buried yourself in until odd hours of the night.

This was the routine you came to know with seldom any out-of-the-ordinary variation.

And then, curiously, slowly, the yaksha you came to befriend incorporated himself into the routine— first embedded into your routines and soon enough ever-present in your heart. Perhaps you could say that he altered your habits for the better.

Nowadays, leaving the harbor after errands is pleasant. No longer does the road back to Qingce isolate you into your thoughts. The sun that casts mesmerizing hues upon the sky as it sets leaves a pleasant warmth on your face. You look forward to his name on your tongue.

‘Xiao.’

The summon rings out clearly amidst his tumultuous headspace, bringing brief peace with the familiarity of the voice. In an instant he’s at your side, the ominous mist that enveloped him subsiding. There's a wordless question in his eyes as he shyly laces his fingers with yours.

With a light squeeze of his hand, you reply, “Let’s go home.”

There’s a pleasant silence that accompanies these walks, his hand firmly holding yours as if you might slip through his grasp at any given moment. On occasion, he would ask how your day went just to hear your voice. Though he wasn’t fond of the crowded hustle and bustle of the harbor, hearing your little enthusiastic retelling was enough to leave him with vivid imagery. Your voice was his comfort.

Arriving home has also taken on a newfound normalcy. With Xiao around, the once-empty house you inherited no longer feels foreign. Finally, with sure conviction, you can say it feels like your own.

Shelves that were once scarce with items and decor were now neatly arranged with ornaments and small handcrafts that Xiao has given you. The bookshelf that was once littered with dust and cobwebs is now rich with rows of books of all sorts. Even tables and bedside stands that were once empty are now always adorned with flowers that you and Xiao pick while out stargazing. These items are glimpses into the new pastimes you treasure to make time for.

Today was one such day where the breeze was pleasant as the sun tucked away for the night. However instead of being outside, you chose to take up comfort reading indoors. There on a pile of blankets and pillows you sat comfortably, Xiao resting his head on your lap to intently listen to you read aloud.

The adeptus reminded you of a cat that’s getting comfortable with a stranger they keep meeting. The spots he chose to rest on were getting much closer in proximity, but never directly on you. That is, until you boldly asked if he would like to rest on your lap and he settled there gratefully with your permission.

You closed the book, running your hand through his hair to get the yaksha to open one eye. “Are you sure you want to hear me read this poem book again? I’m sure you know it by heart at this point,” you pointed out with a laugh. “Why don’t you choose a book this time?”

There was a moment of contemplation before Xiao relented and went to search through the many book spines readily available. A glistening stone caught his attention again—his hand visibly hesitating for a moment.

You leaned your body over a bit from your comfortable pillow haven, curious as to what book he would select. Part of you expected him to select a random one off the bookcase, and was surprised to have a quaint little red book placed in your hands.

“I’ve been meaning to ask… about this one,” Xiao started, his face neutral but betrayed by the twinge of pink that was hidden by the dimness of the lamplight.

“This is…?”

He shrugged. “The subject of this book— is this something you like?”

Confused, you opened the cover. Inscribed on the inside in unmistakable cursive was a message from a certain librarian— a friend. Your brows creased, mouth pressed in a thin line as your eyes skimmed over the note the particular librarian left. A subtle feeling of dread crept over you.

‘Hey cutie, sent you a few goodies that were offloaded from our catalogue this season. Thought you might enjoy this one to spice things up a bit. I know how curious you were about the forbidden section, so here’s a little glimpse for you.’

Oh no… You quickly skimmed through some pages of the book that felt hot in your grip. Or perhaps it was your entire body flushed with embarrassment at the lewd imagery the story portrayed

“I–I didn’t… I d–didn’t know Lisa sent this along with the other books. This book— I haven’t read before so… um…” You anxiously bit your lip, voice growing quieter the more you went on. “I–It was a gift. I didn’t know.”

Xiao hummed, hand grazing your reddened cheeks curiously as you fanned your face. There was practically steam rolling off you.

“So,” Xiao started cautiously, “The things the book spoke of— it’s not something you like?”

If you were red before, you couldn’t possibly imagine how you looked now.

“N–No! I mean— Yes. I mean—!” You fumbled over your words, flustered over such an erotic novel unknowingly being in your possession.

“So, it makes you… happy?”

“Xiao— Stop, please— I’m going to die of embarrassment,” you squeaked into your hands.

His persistent curiosity would be the death of you at this rate. You buried your face under a pillow, too overwhelmed by the suggestive images still swirling in your head.

A little dumbfounded by your reaction, Xiao could only watch your huddled form hide away as he awkwardly rubbed your back in an attempt at reassurance.

The adeptus finally gained a bit of your attention, quietly inquiring, “Do you not wish to talk about that type of subject?”

The grip on your pillow slowly eased up, partially uncovering your face to meet his gaze. There wasn’t an ounce of discomfort on his face, and it was reassuring save for the fact that you were the one needing to explain.

“It’s not… that I don’t want to. Intimacy like— that—“ You pointed accusingly at the book now in his hands. “Is something, uhm, highly emotional— in a good way! Ah, what am I saying… It’s an act of love and bonding with a significant other, so to speak. Usually. Ah— it’s a little complicated.”

As you fumbled with your train of thought, his hand slowly placed itself over yours, thumb brushing over your knuckles. It drew your little state of panic to a close, feeling him press his lips to your forehead in a moment of soft distraction. It quickly brought a small thankful smile to your lips.

Kisses made you happy. This was a fact Xiao had learned.

“Let’s talk about it another time. Do not stress yourself over it.”

You nod timidly, choosing to hide your face in the crook of his neck. “...Okay.”

Xiao leaves not too long after, disappearing into the shadows to diligently tend to his duties. Sleep finds you quicker when he’s not around, though your mind is still tumultuous.

You had half a mind to go straight to Mondstadt and give Lisa a stern reprimand, not that she would care. If anything, it would fuel her amusement and her teasing would become more unbearable especially when your heart could barely handle Xiao boldly initiating displays of affection. That librarian was more perceptive than her languid facade let on.

For the time being you buried the cursed erotic book within cluttered closet boxes and called it a night.

Out of sight, out of mind.

—

A bead of sweat rolling down his temple caught a glimmer of the pale moon watching over him. Beasts that were affected by his karmic debt laid strewn across the battlefield. It weighed heavy on his mind, a distasteful reminder of increasing demonic activity with the Lantern Rite a few weeks away.

There was a light burning sensation that twinged Xiao’s calves and arms, and he rolled his shoulders to relieve his muscles from the fatigue of ceaseless combat. His tired muscles were just about ready to turn in for the night and make his way to Wangshu Inn.

But he paused. The voice tugged at his mind.

‘Xiao…’

There was no mistaking it. It was your voice.

The ache in his muscles was an issue for later. There was strain in your voice, evident discomfort. The reason was uncertain but as much as Xiao wanted to deny it, he was alarmed ever so slightly.

A blur of black mist was all it took and he was gone under the serene moonlight. When he found you, his guard was high with lingering confusion. An intruder was his first thought.

A quick walk around the house, footsteps lighter than the breeze that accompanied him. Nothing. No other presences detected either.

‘You called me, but why?’ Xiao questioned.

The bed gently dipped with quiet creaks where he sat next to you, brushing his thumb over your cheek. Your peaceful sleep was broken as your brows slightly furrowed, breathing slightly labored with small whimpers you let out.

“...X–Xiao,” you quietly whimpered amidst your sleep.

Ah, you had summoned him in your sleep then. How odd. It was a first, to say the least, but he couldn’t be upset with you.

‘Another nightmare…?’

Just how bad could a nightmare be that you would desperately call his name in your sleep, he wondered? But a promise was a promise. He was determined to rid you of your ailments if it was within his power.

The yaksha took in a deep breath, focusing himself fully before slowly exhaling a puff of dark mist. The aches in his body went ignored.

Dearest dream eater, won’t you save her?

—

The sound of his footsteps pacing a dark corridor— humid, stuffy as he pressed forward following the muffled sound of your voice. It’s something he will never forget though he feels he should.

To feel haunted by a dream’s fragments that refuse to vanish is something he should laugh at. It’s not real.

Then why?

Bits and pieces are burned into his memory. Perhaps in a torturously pleasant way he never really imagined. Blame it on him never finding someone he considered such private feelings with.

Xiao did not stay that night after consuming the dream, nor did he come back to check on you come morning as he usually did. On the tiled roof of Wangshu Inn he lays, brows furrowed and a strange warmth pooling throughout his lower torso.

The memory is unlike others that plague him, though it causes him inner turmoil with the increased bodily frustration.

Those eyes… haunt him. The smugness on the face that stared back at him then was enough to piss him off. The reasons festering in his tightened chest he couldn’t quite explain. The fragments would rewind and play, rewind and play, over and over since that night.

‘So,’ the familiar red stranger began with an amused smirk. ‘Looks like the yaksha really will answer any call of his name.’

They made it a point to maintain eye contact as they pressed their lips to your temple, arms holding your back flush against his chest.

Those piercing jade eyes— a mockingly similar exterior. It was like Xiao stared at a twisted reflection of himself conjured by your dream, the red accents in his hair and clothes a fiery scarlet akin to the bubbling anger he felt upon seeing the illusion lay its hands on you. The fact that they spoke in his same voice was enough to raise a rumbling growl within Xiao’s chest.

Quiet huffs left your parted lips as your chest heaved, a scarlet sash tied over your eyes like a blindfold.

‘Xiao, I–‘ Your body shivered at the feeling of his hands gliding over the inside of your thighs. It made you let out an involuntary whimper, cheeks aflame with arousal.

‘That’s enough,’ Xiao commanded the dream illusion of himself through gritted teeth.

The scarlet-hued Xiao shifted you in his lap, his lips set in a mocking smirk as his hand slipped between your legs to elicit sweet mewls from your parted lips. What Xiao wouldn’t give to conjure his spear then and there to wipe that irksome grin off his own face.

The illusion hummed, making it a point to place a kiss to the swell of your exposed chest. ‘Surely you don’t mean to ignore our person’s feelings? Or our own, for that matter. How crude of you, adeptus, to try and stop something she begged me for— something our body clearly begs for, as well.’

‘Quiet.’

The silence was deafening, though the illusion only seemed to stop momentarily out of amusement in seeing how long the real Xiao could uphold such a serious facade. Internally, he battles with two new emotions he hadn’t experienced before— jealousy and arousal. Somehow, because he could channel a warrior's rage through jealousy, the other warm feeling seemed to be drowned out. For now.

‘Silence me all you’d like. Deny your desires until you grow numb, for all I care. But for your human, these desires are your bond,’ the illusion persuaded, unbothered by the icy daggers Xiao glared through him. ‘Isn’t that right, my love?’

His fingers slowly working at the sweet, throbbing ache between your legs left you unable to form any coherent thoughts. Perhaps it was deliberate so your mind was elsewhere, drowning in a hazy pleasure. The gasps and mewls leaving your shaking body were slowly getting to the adeptus. Ironic, just how similar to that stupid book this was.

Xiao scoffed, and prepared himself to finish what he had sought out to do. ‘I don’t concern myself with desires. I’ve had enough of you.’

As Xiao unraveled and crumbled the dreamscape around him, the illusion remained smiling with sly intention.

‘Dishonesty will get you nowhere, Adeptus Xiao. She will be forced to forget this dream, but these feelings you both harbor cannot be erased so easily.’ The illusion lifted the ribbon from your eyes, leaving Xiao momentarily frozen.

Eyes are the windows to the soul, and what he saw in those misty eyes left his body aflame— confused. His tongue darts out to lick his lips, and he swallows thickly.

Once you get a taste, a dormant desire will begin to flourish.

The sly illusion holds their hand out invitingly, jade eyes unreadable as they scrutinize Xiao’s movements. It’s hesitant— the small step forward he takes.

‘What are you waiting for, adeptus?’

—

There’s a harsh gust of wind that blows through, the skies of Liyue harbor a dull grey with the rolling storm. The crashing sounds of waves upon the rocks below the docks resonate with your tempestuous heart. Weary eyes scan the horizon of the uneven sea, looking past the peaks of Guyun Stone Forest in the distance. You cling onto the hope of catching a glimpse of something— something to ease your worrisome heart.

“It’s been a few weeks,” you note quietly, the door of the balcony clicking shut as you walk back into the warm home office.

Yanfei answers without looking up, her hands still furiously scribbling on the parchments that have slowly accumulated into a towering pile. “He’s probably busy. With what exactly, I wouldn’t know— but I’m sure you have a better idea.” She sighs, regretting the coldness of her blunt tone. She adds in a softer tone, finally looking up, “Sorry, I’m not much help if it’s not consultation involving the law.”

The legal adviser can only watch helplessly as your eyes drift back to the window to gaze out beyond the sea’s horizon.

“He’s going to the Lantern Rite festivities with you, right?”

You turn back enough to meet her hopeful gaze with a sad smile. The silence is all the answer she needs.

“Was that a stupid question to ask?”

You shake your head, and turn your face back to the window so she can’t look further into the feelings you try to conceal.

The Lantern Rite was in a few days, and Xiao was nowhere to be seen. Though there've been occasions where you hardly saw him, this… this time was different. It was a feeling you couldn’t shake off and it filled you with uneasiness.

The thought of calling his name and receiving no answer terrified you. Doubt was quick to grip your mind in a vice.

“I think I’m the stupid one.”

[archived-kin]

obey me cast + their genshin mains

i woke up at like three in the morning and scribbled this all down

not a formal writing piece so i haven’t formatted it like one, but i thought this was a fun idea!!

lucifer: diluc

they both have Fatherly Issues (in very different ways though)

probably inwardly makes fun of diluc for not liking wine

doesn’t really have any emotional attachment??? he just keeps diluc because he does a lot of damage and helps kill enemies quick

he actually has pretty good luck with getting 5 stars before he’s even hit pity, but he has awful luck on the event banners in terms of getting the featured 5 star - he’s never once won the 50/50 when he actually reaches it

gets really good artifact and weapon drops though so all of his levelled-up characters have super overpowered kits

he’s never actually looked up any recommended character builds, he’s just smart enough to figure out what all the stats mean and build his characters accordingly

has not touched his serenitea pot since he got it

not actually great with battle strategy and elemental reaction, he just tries to hit as hard as he can at all times

all of his characters are built dps because he doesn’t know how to build supports or healers

never teleports anywhere (he still hasn’t even unlocked half the waypoints)

didn’t realise the statues of seven healed until really late into the game

doesn’t bother with the reputation quests/bounties

all of his characters are still on that black glider that amber first gives you

it took him ages to finish the archon quest in mondstadt because he didn’t want to go into the cathedral

mammon: zhongli

accidentally got zhongli on like his very first event wish and has mained him ever since

he thinks it’s really funny that zhongli never has money (even though he also often has no money)

apart from that he likes the idea of playing the character that literally makes all the mora in teyvat

was actually considering switching after he finished the liyue archon quests because he absolutely hated how zhongli handled the whole thing but he didn’t want to give up that big pp damage

still doesn’t know that you can climb up onto dvalin in the stormterror battle

mixes and matches artifacts, but the ones he does use have really good stats and sub stats though so the lack of a set bonus doesn’t make much difference

didn’t realise you could increase talent levels until ar 50

loves doing the blossoms of wealth and hasn’t let his mora drop below 100k ever since he accidentally used it all up levelling his team to lv60

immediately does a wish as soon as he gets enough primos, unless it’s an event banner for a character he doesn’t like

he also ignores the story and hangout quests for the characters he doesn’t like

dabbles in the serenitea pot but doesn’t have the patience to really commit to it

forgets to do his commissions until the very last minute and lets his resin fill up to 160 before remembering that he’s not supposed to let it get full

is terrified of spiral abyss on a molecular level

levi: barbara

he loves idols so of course barbara is his favourite

has her built dps and does more vaporise damage with her charged attacks than some people’s 5 star bursts

ended up building lisa as a dps too because she makes fighting the oceanid for the cleansing hearts much easier

somehow still gets barbara to heal enormous chunks of hp as well??

has all three of her talents crowned, she’s lv90 and so is her 5 star weapon, plus all of her artifacts are +20

he likes getting the event 5 stars even if he’s never going to build them, they just make him feel superior in his luck

has really bad artifact drops which makes him really frustrated because he knows exactly how to build his characters with the perfect stats, he just can’t get the right artifacts!!!!!

keeps getting crit dmg, crit rate and atk% sub stats on defence circlets and it makes him die a little more on the inside each time

he despises jean because of how she makes barbara feel and desperately wants mihoyo to make a moment where jean tries to fight something but fails and barbara then steps in and takes it down immediately

never gets barbara’s constellations with makes him very upset because he wants c6 so BAD

nearly cried when he got barbara’s happy birthday voiceline

somehow got his serenitea pot to adeptal energy 20k within like two weeks but it doesn’t look good?? it’s just a whole bunch of 4 star furnishings shoved wherever there’s room

is pretty much always online at any given time

has nearly every single achievement in the game (goddammit just GIVE HIM THE RELIABLE HELPER COMMISSION)

satan: diona

this is not up for debate

he saw her in the character archive and immediately decided that if he didn’t get her he was quitting the game

luckily for him it was xiao’s banner around this time and he managed to get c3 diona from that alone

much like levi with barbara, he managed to build her so that she does enormous amounts of damage but still performs her shielding/healing really well

he prioritises her over everyone else but because of this diona is still his only fully-built character

all talents crowned, all artifacts +20, etc

hates draff with all his heart and refuses to buy anything from him

will murder you if you refer to diona as a loli in front of him

i’m aware keqing also sort of looks like she has cat ears but as far as i know that’s just her hair???

if anything i feel like satan wouldn’t like her because he’s offended that people think those chunk of hair look remotely like a cat’s cute lil ears

chose all his other team members based solely on whether or not their skill set would benefit diona

refuses to use any of the characters lucifer uses and got legitimately angry when he found out lucifer had started building diona to help with spiral abyss

spends like five minutes at a time making diona jump into water because he thinks the cannon ball animation is the cutest thing in the world

if a boss he’s fighting manages to kill diona, he gets so angry that he pretty much obliterates it immediately after

asmo: lisa

partially because she’s pretty and her personality is right up his alley, and partially out of pettiness because he sees so many people slandering her

doesn’t know how to build anyone, he’s only got a good lisa build out of sheer luck

none of his other characters have remotely good builds. like, maiden’s beloved on tartaglia?? really, asmo???

squealed when lisa called traveller a cutie

talks to her while he’s running about doing quests or battles

plays pretty sparingly so his ar is relatively low and he barely has any characters outside the starters

usually gets levi to one shot the bosses for him when he needs to ascend/upgrade the talents of his characters

(levi agrees because it gives him a pretty big power trip)

he also likes kaeya and has him in his team but lisa’s magic is just so pretty to him

spends all his primos on the standard banner trying to get lisa constellations but he still only has c4

all of the solo boss battles he’s won were only won out of sheer luck

adores the concept of the serenitea pot, but he doesn’t like a lot of the furnishings available

desperately wants a character customisation function

died seven times trying to do the stormterror fight and had to have levi do it for him in the end

still doesn’t done any of the story quests that you need a key for

spends most of his free time finding some pretty landscapes, changing the time, and taking pictures of lisa doing one of her idles against the sunset

beel: xiangling

decided he liked her as soon as he did her story quest

he’s only gotten up to floor 4 of spiral abyss because he only did floor 3 to get her

still only has c2 :((((

always has to have snacks with him while he’s gaming because xiangling’s voice lines remind him of how hungry he is

desperately wishes she was real because he wants to taste how good her food is for himself

likes cooking a bunch of dishes in-game, but he also gets frustrated because they all look so GOOD and he can’t eat them

doesn’t really know how building works but he does vaguely know what stats are good and how set bonuses work

doesn’t like hu tao because she’s mean to xiangling >:( plus belphie despises her and beel rarely likes anything his twin dislikes

is low-key upset that xiangling’s story quest was so early in the game because he didn’t appreciate it enough at the time and he hasn’t seeb her in-game for ages

still doesn’t have any 5 stars apart from the traveller, but he does have literally every 4 star in the game

is the type to bring xiangling to pyro domains but luckily she does some pretty good physical dmg as well so his teammates don’t get as mad

takes some time out of every day to find every food/ingredient vendor in the game and buy out their entire stock

still has never run out of mora somehow????

belphie: qiqi

i made this choice partially because of that one halloween belphie ur where he’s dressed up in a jiangshi costume

aside from that i feel like she just sends his big brother instincts haywire

he cried a little bit when he read her backstory, not gonna lie

like satan, he will kill you if you call qiqi a loli

somehow managed to build her as a physical dps that does like 5000 per hit?????

(he has unholy artifact luck and all of qiqi’s artis have atk, crit dmg and crit rate as their stats and sub-stats, plus aquila favonia)

he started out building her as an all-around dps but then he realised that her burst and skill couldn’t do much in terms of damage since they’re healing-oriented, so he decided to build her physical since that the only type of dmg she can constantly apply

and qiqi still heals reliably because her healing is scaled off her attack, which is like monstrously high???

qiqi hates hu tao so of course belphie does too

he still refuses to do her story quest and didn’t touch her banner or character trial

really really wants a qiqi banner for constellations but is aware that that is incredibly unlikely

doesn’t trust baizhu and wants zhongli to adopt qiqi since he seems like a much more reliable dad

heard the theory that xiao is the adeptus that killed qiqi and therefore also despises him even though it hasn’t even been concerned or anything

diavolo: eula

don’t get me wrong diavolo definitely gives me pyro vibes but i feel like he’d just feel so bad for how the mondstadters misunderstand and mistreat eula in her story quest that he’d immediately go to spend all his primos on wishing for her

he’s got r2 broken pines and a full pale flame artifact set with some pretty decent stats and substats on her so she does pretty enormous damage

it’s lucky that eula’s move set doesn’t require anything too strategic because all diavolo does is button mash

all of his characters are physical damage dealers because he doesn’t really know how to do elemental reactions

(because of this though he’s awful at fighting a lot of the bosses, especially the oceanid)

his favourite boss battle is the weekly golden house trounce domain because he can always smack childe down really quickly

he’s stinking rich so he can afford to spend just about as much money as he wants to get any character he wants

like he got all the way to pity on eula’s banner and lost the 50/50 to mona but he just bought more primos and got all the way to pity again to get eula

on the other hand he got broken pines twice in two ten rolls on the weapon banner and he wasn’t anywhere near pity for that

he joined levi along with satan and asmo to have a go at doing the golden house fight in co-op and he managed to pretty much oneshot a lv90 childe in phase 1 and phase 3 with just eula’s burst

(he spent phase 2 recharging it)

barbatos: venti

this is at least 70% because venti is also called barbatos

he somehow knows pretty much everything there is to know about building characters well and he’s built venti with both attack and elemental mastery

got venti on his first banner and managed to get to c4 on his rerun

doesn’t appreciate how much venti drinks and actively buys the non-alcoholic juices from angel’s share to give him as if that’ll help????

is terrified of fighting the wolf because it’s immune to anemo

(don’t ask how he managed to get the hurricane seeds for ascending venti)

can pretty much fire off venti’s burst as soon as it’s over because his energy recharge is somehow also insane

diligently collects all the recipes and masters every single one of them

his serenitea pot is literally so perfect looking????? i don’t know how to describe it everything just fits together flawlessly

diavolo offers to buy him primos because he’s got more than enough money but barbatos doesn’t wish a whole lot so he usually refuses

(diavolo knew he mained venti and liked him though so he bought him a bunch for the rerun anyway)

he still doesn’t have any five star weapons but stringless works really well on venti anyway so he doesn’t mind

doesn’t really like co-op, prefers to just wander around in his own world

simeon: yanfei

simeon definitely gives me hydro vibes and he probably mained a hydro before yanfei, but i feel like he happened to get her on zhongli’s banner and decided he really liked her as soon as he started trying her out

he adores her little ‘boom boom!’

she also works really well doing big damage with vaporise which is good because simeon plays a lot with luke, who mains barbara

he low key identifies with how yanfei doesn’t want to focus on her identity as an immortal half-adeptus because simeon himself often wants to forget the fact that he’s a divine being and just live peacefully

often forgets that yanfei gets a lot of her dmg from charged attacks and just keeps doing normal attack combos until he registers the scarlet seals and realises he needs to hold the button down

nearly all of his characters were basically backseat-built by levi and solomon

even though his team is pretty powerful he still dies a bunch because his battle strategy is just ‘stand there and keep hitting the attack button until it dies’

keeps running off of cliffs and forgetting to plunge/glide and just dying to fall damage

back when he was like ar20 he accidentally wandered into liyue early and immediately got killed by a treasure hoarder

spent like ten minutes of his first stormterror fight just running off the end of his platform before someone told him he was meant to glide

luke: barbara as well

if you’ve seen my post about barbara and luke being siblings you’ll understand why i’ve made this choice

aside from that luke just likes barbara because she’s one of the nicest characters in the game

plus she’s a deaconess in a church and he’s an angel so

unlike levi he’s got her built purely as a healer, but she heals so MUCH

luke’s entire team is just support characters?? but their support is so good that they kind of make each other dpses in their own right??

his strategy is to keep his whole team at full hp and deal relatively small but very steady increments of damage

unfortunately this means he isn’t great at the artifact and weapon/character enhancement domains because they’ve got time limits

wants to have a pretty serenitea pot but he just can’t get it to look how he wants it to

like levi, he doesn’t like jean because of how she makes barbara feel (and also how jean just refuses to take any sort of older sister role for her)

got her to c6 on a single event banner because she just kept coming home (he wasn’t complaining though)

is contemplating building her dps because he thinks it’d be cool if she did a bunch of damage like levi’s barbara

likes to just sit and wait for her to do her dancing idle because he thinks it’s cute (will immediately make her move and cut off the other one though because it’s about jean and he doesn’t like her)

solomon: albedo

they both look sensible but they’re both just mad scientists on the inside

doesn’t really know how albedo’s burst and skill work, just keeps tapping buttons whenever they’re available

if he didn’t have albedo he’d probably main a catalyst but he relates to how curious albedo is about just about everything

(plus he does like his design)

always gets the limited time 5 star on his first ten pull on the event banners????? is he using his magic somehow??????

and also somehow gets really good weapons and artifacts????

he knows enough about artifacts to know what to put on who so all of his characters are really well built

he’s the type with eight lv90 5-stars with lv90 5-star weapons and fully upgraded artifact sets in his character showcase

his signature is ‘hack me i dare you’

constantly getting friend requests from fellow players who want an op friend to help them in domains and against bosses

but unfortunately even if solomon has a bunch of overpowered characters he is very bad at using them

gets all the elemental reactions wrong, uses the wrong element against the wrong enemy, forgets to do things like putting albedo’s skill down before his ult, and he can’t aim with any of the archers

like i said he just taps buttons and hopes for the best

because of this he’s still at floor 6 in spiral abyss

[styw]

sweaters and ipods

In which Park Chaeyoung forgot to return Jisoo Kim's sweater and Ipod.

Pairing: Kim Jisoo & Park Chaeyoung

CHAESOO

It's not like she's going to jail for this. Yeah, she's not really going to jail for this, because, after all, the iPod that she's holding, and the sweater that she had just borrowed slash stole was from her best friend for almost twelve years, Jisoo Kim.

It's not like this was her first time stealing clothes from Jisoo, but it's sure to be her first time holding an iPod she doesn't recognize. She had only found out it was from Jisoo when the raven had told her that she could use it to find something informative for their project since Chaeyoung had forgotten to bring her laptop along with her.

And of course, Chaeyoung, being a forgetful person, had also failed to realize that she had taken the iPod along with the sweater. Damn her forgetful mind.

Chaeyoung sighs, stomping her feet on the floor the moment she arrives. How is she supposed to return these now? She had promised to spend her time at Lisa's house to help the Thai pursuing her best friend's once in a lifetime love life tomorrow.

And even if she attempted to return it tomorrow along with Lisa, she knew Jisoo wouldn't let her go so easily, and Lisa would end up drifting away in the process. Then Lisa would tease her endlessly for being such a whip at Jisoo. As much as she hated it whenever Lisa teased her about it, it would be a lie to say she didn't get butterflies in her stomach whenever she saw the smile on the raven's lips.

Chaeyoung's kryptonite, after all, was Jisoo's warm cuddles, sloppy kisses on her cheeks, and smiles.

I'm sure Jisoo wouldn't mind me holding her iPod for the weekend, right?

Yeah, It's not like Jisoo would die for not having her iPod for the weekends. After all, the raven wasn't really interested in playing games on her iPod unless it was used for listening to some songs Chaeyoung didn't know about.

Speaking of music, Chaeyoung's eyebrow lit up and she glanced at her best friend's iPod. If there was something Chaeyoung was so curious about and eager to find out, it would be Jisoo's taste in music. Sure, they've been friends for the longest time, but Chaeyoung had never really caught a glimpse of the older girl's music taste.

Though she does hear Jisoo humming some songs, she's only sure that it was just some piano pieces created by some famous pianists that Chaeyoung isn't really familiar with.

Chaeyoung lets her fingertips collide with the screen and go to Jisoo's spotify account.

Okay, knowing Jisoo, the raven woman, would probably find no sense in purchasing a premium account when you can just browse some playlists to play the song you like, but then everyone has a surprise under their sleeves.

Chaeyoung widens her eyes in disbelief when she sees the word "premium" in bold capital letters beside Jisoo's weird username.

Okay, that's totally a first.

She doesn't expect that, nonetheless. She shoots her eyebrows up when she sees the recently played songs.

Okay, she had totally not known that Jisoo adored Doja Cat.

Chaeyoung couldn't help, but find herself smirking as she recalled one time Lisa and she had a bet about Jisoo having at least one sinful song on which the raven listened.

Apparently, it looks like she won that bet they had. Chaeyoung took a mental note to tell Lisa about it tomorrow.

The next thing she did was to listen to anything she wanted. The perks of having a rich friend? They can use their Spotify account without fear of being charged.No, really, Chaeyoung was just kidding, nonetheless. She's going to start using Jisoo's account starting today.

And she did as she cleaned, because after all, cleaning without music is kind of boring, right?

Chaeyoung takes the broom, lip-syncing as she swings the broom, just like any musician would do whenever they are in the moment.

If only anyone could see, her sister or mother, they would have laughed their ass off once they caught Chaeyoung in the moment. But they wouldn't. They wouldn't, because no one was in the house aside from her, and Chaeyoung took advantage of that.

For minutes that almost turned into an hour, Chaeyoung kept her pace until she furrowed her eyebrows at the song's turning from energetic to sad.

It's not like Chaeyoung hates sad songs.

She'd just like to skip it, because she's cleaning, for goodness sake, and she doesn't have time to get fake sad during the cleaning. Okay, she does have time, but she scheduled it for a very late night.

So she takes the phone to skip, only to find a playlist that had her... name?

Chaeyoung felt her heart skip a beat. She knew the name Chaeyoung could be anybody's name, but maybe, just maybe, it was for her, because after all, she hadn't seen anyone with a Chaeyoung name interacting with Jisoo except her.

Chaeyoung takes a sharp breath. She taps, and when she sees all the songs, some of them are familiar to her, while others are not. And Chaeyoung isn't an idiot.

Okay, maybe she is, because she's blushing over something she wasn't even sure was for her. Although, she does feel a sting in her heart when she realizes this was all a love song and it's for somebody who's not her.

I Like U - NIKI

Sweet - Cigarrettes After Sex

Adore you - Harry Styles

Fallin' All In You - Shawn Mendes

Best Part (feat. H.E.R.) - Daniel Caesar, H.E.R.

Baby I'm Yours - Artic Monkeys

This is how you fall in love - Jeremy Zucker, Chelsea Cutler

I Love You 3000 - Stephanie Poetri

Paraluman - Adie

I Don't Wanna Be Okay Without You - Charlie Burg

It takes two - Fiji Blue

we fell in love in october - girl in red

Rosie - John Mayer

Wish You Were Gay - Claud

I wanna be your girlfriend - girl in red

I Kissed A Girl - Katy Perry

Cool for the summer - Demi Lovato

Chaeyoung smiles a little, almost sadly, and just when she was about to put the tablet down, and perhaps sigh in sadness, a knock was heard from her door.

She yelped, holding her chest in the process to ease the adrenaline rushing to her spine.

"Chaeyoung? It's me, Jisoo. Can you open the door?" A familiar muffled voice was heard from the door.

"Jisoo?" Chaeyoung mumbled, as if processing. "Jisoo? Soo!?"

"Yes, it's me," Jisoo says, "I think you got my tablet."

Chaeyoung freezes. She glances at the tablet, and if Jisoo finds out about her snooping into her spotify account, she's doomed.

"Uh-- yes, I'm coming!" Chaeyoung shouts, taking the tablet as she closes all the tabs hastily. However, she wasn't sure if this would be enough to destroy all the evidence. "Hold on,"

After a couple of seconds of speed exiting all the tabs. Chaeyoung takes a final glance at the mirror before fake coughing and finally opening the door for her best friend.

"Hey," Chaeyoung rubbed her index finger against her thumb. "You should have waited for tomorrow to come, ya know."

Jisoo smiles, walking inside before diving into Chaeyoung's bed. Chaeyoung purses her lip, following along, but not to the bed. Instead, she walked to the desk, and gave the tablet to her best friend.

"You used the key at the mailbox?" Chaeyoung asks, recalling about the key Jisoo and her used to hide so if ever one of them gets drunk, they'll still have a home to return to.

"Yeah," Jisoo replies, propping her cheek at her palm as she watches Chaeyoung. "I sent you a text about me coming a while ago, but you didn't respond."

"You did?" Surprised by new information, Chaeyoung takes her phone out only to find three missed calls and Jisoo telling her about coming over.

"Sorry," She says quickly. "I didn't notice it. I was too engrossed in cleaning around the house."

And also vibin on your spotify account.

Jisoo doesn't say anything. Instead, she just stared at her best friend. Normally, in this situation, Chaeyoung would stare at her back, but how can she stare at her back when everytime she glances at Jisoo, she thinks of the person Jisoo has fallen in love with.

"What?" She didn't mean it to come out nervously.

"Nothing," Jisoo replies, smiling as she sighs fully into the bed. She signaled Chaeyoung to come over, which Chaeyoung obeyed.

And before Chaeyoung could realize it, she was already engulfed in a fragrance that she dearly adored. She smiled, engulfed back.

"You smell so good, Soo." It wasn't planned. In fact, Chaeyoung just blurted it out. At this point, she's going to tape her mouth.

She hears Jisoo laugh at that. And god, just like every puppy love sick out there, she would always find Jisoo's laugh her favorite sound.

Then her laugh died down. Chaeyoung could feel Jisoo's grip on her growing tighter

"You saw it, didn't you?"

Fear of getting caught, Chaeyoung's breath halted. "What?"

"That playlist."

"What playlist?" It was the nervousness that talked, nonetheless. Chaeyoung hopes it wasn't too obvious.

Jisoo's grip around her loosened and sat up. Chaeyoung could feel an intense atmosphere from Jisoo and the fact that she doesn't know what the raven was feeling at the moment was not helping at all.

"You saw it." Jisoo wasn't asking. She was stating the fact and the fact that she could see through Chaeyoung amazes the blonde.

"Okay, fine." Chaeyoung breathes and realizes just how long she has been holding her breath. "I saw it."

All of a sudden, Jisoo smiles, almost shyly. And Chaeyoung hated that stupid smile. Are they going to talk about their crushes now? Because Chaeyoung doesn't find any amusement in Jisoo talking about the girl she likes.

"Did you listen to it?"

"I didn't."

"Why not?" Jisoo asked, furrowing her eyebrows.

At this point, all Chaeyoung felt was irritation, and sadness. She sat up, mumbling.

"Just because," She says before finally taking the courage to get out of the bed only to be held back when she feels Jisoo's hand on her.

"ButIMadeItForYou-"

"Huh?"

Jisoo clears her throat. A blush appears on her cheeks as she glances away.

"I made it for you." She mumbled.

Dazed and stunned, Chaeyoung doesn't say anything. Instead, she only stared at Jisoo in shock. Okay, first of all, she didn't expect that. Second of all, she has been crushing on Jisoo since elementary grade and has been showing her adoration, but the thing throughout that year was everybody knew but Jisoo. She was so dense.

"Can you say anything back, please?" Jisoo pleaded in anxiety.

"This was for me." Chaeyoung finally says, as if she was stating a fact.

"It's just for you."

"You like me?" Chaeyoung blurts out, her gaze steadying into Jisoo.

Jisoo nervously glanced at her best friend before looking down. The way Chaeyoung had stared at her was something that she couldn't comprehend.

"No," She finally says before gathering all of her courage. She glances up to meet her best friend's eyes and when she sees how dejectedly Chaeyoung looked. She widened her eyes.

"No! I--- I mean," She stands up, taking Chaeyoung's hands into hers. "I mean, I love-- I love you, Chaeyoung. I have been in love with you for a long time."

"You're in love with me?" Chaeyoung asks, her eyes were bloodshot.

Jisoo only smiled. She could totally understand why Chaeyoung has been acting like this. If only Lisa hadn't talked her out of this back in highschool, she wouldn't have realized just how lovesick she was for Chaeyoung.

"I am." She says, bravely. "I'm sorry it took me long to--"

"No, it's..." Chaeyoung didn't get to finish what she said, because the next thing Jisoo felt was Chaeyoung embracing her.

She hadn't said anything. Chaeyoung hadn't said anything about liking nor loving her back. Oh no, was she late? No.

There was silence engulfed between them and Jisoo's head was filled with negative thoughts. If only she had been early, she wouldn't have lose Chaeyoung in the first place. Damn it.

"I understand that you don't feel anything for me anymore, Chaeyoung." Jisoo was aware of her voice cracking down, nonetheless. She continued to speak and embraced the blonde back.

"I was too late. And I'm sorry for being late. This was my fault." She continued, "But even though you don't feel the same anymore, can I just love you still?"

Jisoo bit down her bottom lip, keeping her tears at bay as she caressed the blonde's hair.

"You idiot," Chaeyoung finally mumbles, breaking away from the embrace as she wipes her tears. "You think I'd lose feelings for you when all I ever felt whenever I'm with you is paradise?

"I love you too, you idiot." Chaeyoung hisses before she leans closer and captures Jisoo's lips to hers.

[mrkcore]

𝐅𝐈𝐍𝐀𝐋𝐋𝐘 - 𝐥.𝐣𝐧

𝐩𝐚𝐢𝐫𝐢𝐧𝐠: lee jeno x reader (ft. jaemin)

𝐜𝐨𝐧𝐭𝐞𝐧𝐭𝐬: soulmates!au, barista!jeno, coffee shop setting ;)

𝐰𝐨𝐫𝐝 𝐜𝐨𝐮𝐧𝐭: 1.2k

𝐠𝐞𝐧𝐫𝐞: fluffy fluff ehehe

𝐰𝐚𝐫𝐧𝐢𝐧𝐠(𝐬): none (mentions of food)

𝐥𝐢𝐬𝐭𝐞𝐧 𝐭𝐨: boyfriend by coin, golden by harry styles, falling for u by mxmtoon & peachy!, in love by khai dreams, olivia by one direction, kiss me kiss me by 5sos, lover by taylor swift

𝐚/𝐧: i’ve had this idea for jeno for the past month, and then boom appears cafe dream lmaoo, happy birthday jeno <3 (feedback is appreciated too! :D)

“lisa, i swear!” you try telling your friend again. “every time i’m here, it always says 4 meters away. it can’t be just a coincidence!”

“are you sure it’s him though?” she questions. “just be sure, that’d be embarrassing if it wasn’t and you went up to him to declare your love only to be shot down.”

“literally every single time i go up to order something, it displays less than a meter, who else would it be?” you’re bouncing in your seat now. you’ve been waiting for a long time to muster up the courage to go and introduce yourself, and maybe hint at your special bond. today, you’ve brought your best friend to give you moral support.

“okay, go do it. i believe in you, don’t back out in the last moment, if this succeeds, you know what that means.” lisa winks at you while you roll your eyes at her tone and what she is hinting at.

“okay,” you sucked in your breath, and exhaled. “whew, i got this.” you tried calming your nervous, excited, very confused nerves.

“go!” lisa pats you as you stand up, walking towards him. you give lisa a last forced smile, and she sends you an encouraging thumbs up back. and you turn around, facing your goal straight on.

it seems like the regular handsome barista is also walking towards the boy too, but it doesn’t matter, nothing is going to stop you.

before the barista can even open his mouth, you start speaking.

“hi! i’m y/n, this might seem weird to say, but i think you’re my soulmate.” you try to smile after blurting it out, wanting to crawl into your hole of a room in embarrassment. especially when the boy tries to hide a laugh, and the barista beside you lets out an annoyed huff and walks back to the counter. 

you are so confused, and embarrassed. very embarrassed. did you mention embarrassed?

“uhm, is there a problem-” you look down at your arm, and instead of a 0, what you were expecting, there’s a 2. “oh, oh no. i am so sorry.” you say to the boy in front of you.  

“don’t worry about it,” he chuckles. you wanted to die. “i’m jaemin, i think i’ve seen you around the cafe before.”

“yeah, you’re always here when i am and stuff just matched up for some reason, i’m so sorry about the misunderstanding.” you apologize one more time before turning around to walk back to your table, dejected.

“wait one second,” jaemin says, you turn back to face him, confused once more. “you have the wrong person, but you’re right, someone here is your soulmate.”

“jaemin, your coffee.” you turn to see the barista again, this time holding a cup of coffee, no it doesn’t even look like coffee, more like straight up poison. you watch in awe as he happily accepts it and takes a delighted sip.

“ah yes, i’m finally awake.” jaemin smiles brightly. “what were we talking about again? oh right, your soulmate.” you look down at your wrist again, and this time, it displays 0. 

“it’s you!” you exclaimed, as if you had an eureka moment, spinning around to face your true soulmate, the barista. 

he scoffs before walking back to the counter, you following closely behind him.

“took you long enough.” he said, you leaned on the counter, watching him make another cup of coffee.

“why didn’t you say anything if you knew?” you questioned, your ego slightly bruised. 

“it was cute listening to you rant about not being able to find your soulmate, and then realize that they would be in this cafe. the one you come to about every single day.” he turns around and hands you an iced coffee, just the way you like it.

“how long have you known?” you sipped curiously.

“about 2 months? give or take.” he then hands you a cutely made cat cupcake, he sees the way you perked up after given food.

“wow, you really have some good self-control, if that was me, i’d not be able to hold myself back.” you happily munch on the yummy treat, getting some frosting on your top lip.

“yeah, i can tell.” he leans in, wiping the frosting off your lip, handing you a napkin, you feel your face heating up. “oh hey, jaemin owes me $5.” the boy suddenly remembers out of the blue.

“for what?” you finish the cupcake and throw the wrapper in the garbage beside him.

“i bet that you wouldn’t guess it was me.” he smiles to himself, seeming pretty proud of himself. you huffed. “i’m still pretty surprised you had the guts to go up to someone to ask though, congrats.”

“aghh, i just don’t know why you wouldn’t tell me, and just watch me go up to someone and be wrong! what kind of soulmate are you?” you really feel embarrassed, but at least now you know who your soulmate is.

“well, why didn’t you think it was me?” the boy asks you this time. you feel your face hot again, and you turn around, not wanting to face him. 

“i thought you were too handsome and i was too nervous to be around you.” you mumble. you had secretly been crushing on him for a while, before you figured out that your soulmate would be in the cafe every single time you were there. but after finding out, you thought he was way out of your league and completely disregarded him.

“what did you say?” he leaned in closer to try and hear you better, but very obviously teasing you. “i didn’t quite catch that.”

“you heard me, dummy.” you pouted, grumbling as you crossed your arms. 

“i thought you said i made you nervous, what happened to that huh?” he laughs, teasing you further.

“well, now i’m not because i know you’re my soulmate.” you catch lisa looking at you, puzzled at what is unfolding in front of her eyes. you sent a pair of thumbs up to reassure her. “anyways soulmate, you got a name don’t you?”

“it’s jeno, it’s also on my name tag, do you not pay attention to me at all?” jeno pouts, making you swoon a bit.

“i know your name! i just wanted to hear you say it.” you try and defend yourself. jeno laughs at how easily you are worked up. “so, soulmate, does that mean i get free food here now?” you wink at him as he looks at you in disbelief.

“that was my hard work for these 2 months, i could’ve given that cupcake to me to treat myself.” jeno complains. “and i’m really hungry right now.”

“hmm, are you sure?” you try again.

“no.”

“please?” you look at him with wide and sparkly eyes you know he can’t resist.

“negotiable.” he crosses his arms, facing away from you as he blushes.

“see! i knew you were a softie.” you poke him in the side.

smiles grow on both of your faces and you know you’ve found your soulmate.

© mrkcore. 2021

[notmrskennedy]

Friendliness

A/N - ha so i just wrote this - no editing we die like men. here’s the alternate ending to my other post Likeability (this one is the more predictable one y’all will probably like whoops) if you’ve read the other one, just skip to the end it’s all the same in the middle 

Summary - The Team meets a very unfriendly scientist which Spencer’s taken a fancy to

W/C - 2.9k (whoops)

Warnings - Mild Anatomy/bones/etc discussion, a pinch and change of swearing

----

Luke is holding his stomach in his hands. He could usually pride himself on keeping his cool, keeping his head—and stomach—together during a case. He’d seen enough dead bodies that this shouldn’t have thrown him like he’d just sailed twelve foot waves in a dingy. 

But he is, after all, standing over a mass grave. Watching a too giddy scientist dig up the bodies. 

You’ve captured everyone’s attention, for various reasons. Rossi is vaguely amused by your joyous shouting of bones and your rat moustached assistant. Luke can’t tear his eyes away from the car wreck—are you supposed to swing bones around like baseball bats? Reid seems more interested in your bad jokes and coveralls than he is in solving the case. 

The rat assistant—Stewart Walsh—squeezes between Luke and Reid, scuttling like some kind of diseased turtle. “Doctor Y/L/N!”

You barely stop pouring over the mud covered pelvis in your hands to even acknowledge him. 

“I just thought you should know that Dr. Evanston just got here.”

You look up, toss the bone to him, and snort. “Tell him the soil samples are four miles due east from here.”

“What’s wrong with Evanston?” Luke asks to no one in particular it seems, waving Stewart off to run for a group of approaching nerds in coveralls. 

Ignoring the question or maybe Luke, you just turn back to your search. Elbow deep in mud, being nice must not have been on the to-do list. Reid leans over, hands in his pockets, and whispers, “Evanston stole one of her research papers. I thought he was going to get his teeth kicked in—“

“Skull!” you holler. Luke isn’t stupid enough to miss the glare reserved for the sheepish Dr. Reid.

He clears his throat. “Thoughts so far, doctor?”

“I’m thinking beetles,” is all you say before turning back to your skull. Luke might not know many scientists, but he doesn’t think that most of them look at human skulls like its the Mona Lisa. Like this fat piece of bone held the answers to the universe inside its empty eye sockets. 

“Beetles?” Luke coughs. Rossi just shakes his head. Pretends this isn’t a conversation he’s having. Reid is still studying you like Luke might study infiltration schematics. Stewart runs up, out of breath, very rose coloured. 

You’re eyes are sparkling as you wade over to them with a new radius bone in your hands. Everyone bends like they know what they’re looking at and you point along the edge of the bone. “It’s a subtle difference but these bones have been cleaned before being buried. My guess is carrion beetles. They’re very hard workers. And—“ you switch to pointing at the radial head— “minute scoring and kerf marks. These look pretty old, so I’m assuming we’re getting close to the bottom.”

“So our unsub dismembered his victims,” Rossi begins, “then cleaned the pieces?”

You nod and hand off the bone to a very blushing Stewart. “I won’t know for sure until I’ve had a chance to examine all the bones. There’s nothing definitive yet. What a hobbyist though, right?”

You chuckle to yourself and dive back into fishing out more finger and wrist bones. Luke turns, runs his hands over his face, and hikes a thumb over his shoulder. “Where did we find her?”

Rossi shrugs, “FBI easter egg hunt.” Luke blinks, while Rossi chuckles at his gullibility. “Come on, the doctor’s the best in the field. Good kid, I can tell.” 

“Y/N’s great,” Spencer absently adds on, too busy staring at you. You’re explaining different types of dismemberment to Stewart like you’re discussing the rain. Luke grips onto his stomach just a little tighter. 

“Y/N, huh?” Luke teases, momentarily forgetting the unsettling feeling in his gut about you. “You two, uh, friends or something?”

It’s Reid’s turn to stumble. “Yeah, but it’s—we’re just—we’re just—.” 

Rossi shakes his head, slaps Reid on the shoulder. “Oh yeah, just friends. So, tell me. Do you talk about dismemberment before or after you make out?”

#

JJ wants to beg Emily not to make her go down into the basement. You’re down there. She knows it’s childish to be this avoidant—you are just a person after all. A creepy, psychopathic weirdo that makes JJ’s gut churn. She gets why Spencer’s taken to you—shared love of science and random trivia. She does. But that doesn’t mean JJ enjoys the cold ass morgue, smiling along as you ramble. Most of everyone’s limited contact with you has involved random facts and Stewart’s too intimate knowledge of fracture patterns. 

There had been ten minutes of reassurance from Emily that you were, in fact, not a horrible person. Ended with JJ making the cold and dark trek down to the morgue. She couldn’t imagine working down here all day long. No one to talk to, no one to strategise with, no where to go. Maybe it suited you. No one would have to listen. 

“—don’t know what to do!” echoes across the bottom of the stairwell, the morgue’s doors cracked open. The distress breaks JJ’s heart. Your voice stops her dead in her tracks.  

“They don’t hate you,” Spencer’s voice comes after. Gentler, softer. “They—they just don’t know you yet.”

“They don’t want to, Spence!” and JJ winces with the words. It always hurt more when the truth came out in that tone. “I get it! You know? I work with human remains and don’t bring my people skills with me when I’m on the job, but—that shouldn’t matter!” 

JJ winces again, tries to ignore how those are nothing short of teary sniffles echoing through her ears. She leans back against the wall and has no idea what to do. Spencer had obviously been down here for hours. Knew you well enough to get the teary truth. What could she do now? Interrupt? 

She’d walked into hostage situations less freakin’ stressful than this. 

“You’re right,” Spencer soothes, steadfast and strong, “it doesn’t matter. This isn’t—“

“It’s not your fault,” you sigh. JJ doesn’t want to hear the strangled touch to your voice. Doesn’t want to hear the break. “They’re your friends and I’m just your—“ 

 “Doctor!” Stewart calls and JJ could scream. You’re his what? 

At least, it’s as good as any moment to intrude. 

“What, Stewart?” you snapped, already broken away from Spencer with wet cheeks and stained glasses. You wipe them off haphazardly with the tail end of Spencer’s sweater sleeve—JJ couldn’t help but smile, even if it’s a little strangled. 

Stewart jumps like a wet cat and tosses a bundle of files into your hands. “Beetles.”

One word snatches the tears from your face. Snatches you away from Spencer’s side for one of the dozen skeletons on the tables. There was no reason to think that she’ll get her report from you now. With a rib bone in one hand and contemplation in your features—JJ can’t decide how unnerved she is—you’re a little too concentrated. 

Stewart scuttles around you. A little too attentive. A little too cherry tinted. Yep. No reports to be had from either of you. JJ turned to Spencer instead, hoping that maybe he’d be helpful. Plastered up like a billboard, JJ knows that saccharine smile isn’t going to get her anywhere. 

“Spence?”

He hums, halfheartedly tearing his eyes away. “Yeah?”

“I need the latest report for Emily, but I don’t think—“

“I’ll—just a second, JJ.” Spencer grins, sugary sweet, and slips away. JJ doesn’t miss how he places a hand on your shoulder as he passes. How you barely even notice that quite intimate contact. She also doesn’t miss how Stewart’s face sours at the action, how his eyes narrow enough that Spencer feasibly should’ve noticed. 

Reports in hand a minute later, JJ leans over to Spencer. Elbows him in the arm. “Stewart seems pretty jealous. Any reason for that?”

Spencer shrugs. “Wouldn’t know a thing about it.”

#

Rossi doesn’t have an opinion. Everyone keeps asking—oh Rossi, you’re the wisest of us all, what should we do about poor little Y/N? He doesn’t know, doesn’t care. You are just some scientist who is doing a thousand percent better job than any other forensics ‘expert’ he’s had the pleasure of working with. 

Your lab doesn’t smell. You don’t smell. Is there anything more to ask for? 

But he does get the brute of having to make the trek down to the morgue—god, his knees alone—and receives most of the reports from the not as horrible as everyone thinks Dr. Y/N Y/L/N. Who is joyfully humming while squinting over one of the skeleton’s hands. 

“Hey, doc,” he calls and you look up at him with an adorable sort of grin. “Got anything new?”

“Sure,” you chirp. Hesitate to wave him over. “If you want the details, that is.”

Rossi shakes his head, pulls up a stool to sit next to you and your subject. “I like to have as much knowledge as I can. You never know what will lead you to your un-sub.”

You settle your elbows on the table, straighten a stray finger bone. The team shouldn’t be worried about you being a psychopath. You’re dedicated, careful, attentive. Rossi hopes that if he ever gets turned into human remains, you’re the one looking over him. There’s been more care put into one skeleton than into his three combined marriages. 

“You’re in luck,” you answer, “I’ve got a lot to tell you about our attacker. You’ve got time, right?”

Rossi nods, smiles. “Plenty.”

#

Penelope still hasn’t met you and that kind of pisses her off. You haven’t made it upstairs once? She flies into some dingy Wyoming hovel of a police station for like a week and no one’s thought to bring you upstairs? Rude. 

She’s sitting in JJ’s desk chair, waiting for her and Luke to get back from interviewing a potential lead—some ex-felon who fit your makeshift profile. Reid’s scouring over some boring geographical profile, trying not to get annoyed as she nervously—angrily—rants about the case to him. She knows he’s tuning her out, but her work’s been put on the back burner until someone comes up with something to give her. 

There’s only so much a computer can find and she’s no profiler. 

It’s about five minutes after Reid snapped and left to get a coffee refill, when she picks up a call from the desk. “Hello?”

Creaking metal and shuddering breathing comes first. “Set the scalpel down” comes second.  She swallows, silent, and panicking. What the heck is she supposed to do? Paying attention to those hostage negotiation seminars that she definitely didn’t go to would’ve come in handy right about now. 

Said scalpel clatters onto some metal table, followed by a strong, “You really don’t want to do this. Please put the gun down.”

Oh god, this is happening. 

“You just—“ a male voice snips, bellowing out, “YOU DON’T LOOK AT ME.”

“I do look at you, Stewart,” you plead just as JJ and Luke clamour through the bullpen’s door. Penelope puts the call on speaker, mutes it, and screams for them. 

“I don’t know what to do,” Penelope sobs professionally, “someone’s got a gun.”

JJ runs for Emily’s office while Reid returns heedlessly. Luke puts a soft hand on Penelope’s cold one and squeezes. Newbie or not, it’s appreciated as the man’s voice returns. “I’ve tried for so long to get you to—to just—just look at me! I’ve done so much!”

“I know, Stewart,” you ease and Reid tenses. Nearly drops his coffee. “It’s not your fault. You’ve worked so hard.”

“Yeah,” Stewart sobs; Penelope can only imagine how crazy this kid must be. 

“Did you leave all those bodies for me, Stewart?” you question and everyone holds their breath. Luke squeezes harder on her hand. Reid’s twitching like a rabbit’s nose, a death grip on his mug, frozen as a Michigan pond. 

Stewart sniffles. Probably nods. Penelope doesn’t know whether to run or sit or cry. She decides it’s probably cry, but instead her fingers start moving to record the call, trace the office origin. 

“It was a great puzzle, Stewart, it was really genius. It was a fun case to follow, you know that.” You swallow hard, metal tinkles through the speaker. Please, Penelope begs, don’t let them kill each other. I haven’t met the doctor yet!

“Why did you kill these girls, Stewart?” your voice is so gentle and lulling Penelope almost forgets that she’s listening to you try to save your own life. 

 “I wanted you to look,” he says, sniffles. “I wanted you. I want you, Y/N. I want you to love me.”

It’s either her computer beeping or someone falling through a table or a gunshot. She doesn’t know. She’s crying too hard to care. 

#

Tara doesn’t know when she started to run—probably just after JJ, Luke, and Reid barrelled passed her by the bathroom shouting about the situation—but she’s almost to the morgue doors, right on Reid’s heels. Lord almighty, she feels so stupid. She’d had enough little one on one chats with Stewart to know he was some sort of psycho in disguise. To know that something was wrong with that kid. No one could last more than three minutes with your grad student assistant without wanting to take an eyeball out—his or theirs it didn’t matter. She’d let herself believe you when you told her that all forensic anthropologists seem like that. That there was nothing to worry about. 

Nothing to worry about her ass. 

Luke’s the first to storm the morgue, expecting what Tara is: you, dead, on the floor with Stewart on the brink of killing himself. But they stop and they stare and Reid beams on with the absurd look on your face. 

You’re shaking with rage, pointing a gun at a very unconscious, crumpled, bleeding Stewart Walsh. Your teeth are bared in what Tara would consider out of a comic book—ludicrous and of someone who’s completely lost their mind. JJ makes the mistake of asking if you’re alright.

“Alright?” you chirp, feral and ravenous. JJ and Luke shrink back as you shout, “I lived in Honduras for three years! This isn’t even the worst thing that’s happened to me. It’s my third fucking kidnapping!”

“T-third?” Luke croaks. 

“Third!” you shout again and recklessly set your gun on the table. Spencer grins, which sets you off further. “I’ve been nice. I’ve been accommodating. But this is my fourth psychotic grad student! I fucking swear—!”

Stewart groans—thank god he’s alive—and Spencer, thankfully, rushes forward to catch you before you can take anything else out on the kid. Tara’s heard rumours about mysterious other instances of your being under arrest. Illegal transportation of goods was one thing, police brutality was another. The scalpel sticking out of his knee is bad enough. 

She helps Luke haul Stewart to his feet, reeking of desperation and a much needed psych eval. JJ follows close behind, closes the morgue doors behind them. But not before they hear your muffled sobs and Spencer’s smiling. 

“You got him, Y/N.”

“No, Spence,” you correct, and Tara can’t help but be proud, “I kicked the snot out of him.”

#

Emily is barely awake when she sees it. JJ’s soft breathing next to her is lulling by itself, let alone if you add in Rossi’s rhythmic snoring and Luke’s idle whispers of sleep talk. Emily could do with some sleep and maybe a few days off. They could all use a few days off, especially after coming to terms with the fact a grad student had killed 12 women just to get a little action. 

From a scientist who freely admitted to enjoying the company of bones over real people. 

Alive people. 

No wonder Stewart had done what he’d done. 

Emily turns in her spot, lays back against the wall of the airplane and the seat. After nearly five decades—she’s never thinking about that again—of plane rides, she can comfortably say she can sleep anywhere. With any amount of noise, or cold, or pain. 

But her eyes are accidentally open when she peaks around the seat cushion. Spies the Wild Dr. Reid in his natural habitat, reading some ridiculously long book and…carding his fingers through your hair? He’s got a lock curled up around his finger, gently twisting it as he reads. You’re sleeping—knocked the fuck out—in his lap, gripping loosely onto his leg. 

You deserve the sleep, Emily decides with a smile. You’d worked the hardest on the case, up for nearly four days with as little rest as you can manage. How Stewart managed to stay awake enough to attack you is beyond Emily. She’s missed out on a few hours just today and she’s losing the battle with her eyelids. 

No one ever asked her opinion of you. Probably didn’t have to. You were not the easiest to like, but you’d captured her respect and a bit of her heart when you’d said at the beginning of the case: “I’m an excavator by trade—I’m at archeological digs most of the time—so it’s hard to wrap my head around the fact that these ladies are murder victims. I don’t think I’ll sleep until I’ve got names for them. And maybe the murderer on my table.”

Emily understood the unease, the apprehension. Why everyone was relieved when you’d turned down the plane ride she’d offered you. How they all bit back groans when Emily had insisted. But they’ll have to get used to it, Emily thinks and she settles again. Because they’ll see you again. No doubt about it. The way you’re wrapped up around Spencer, how you hold tighter when the jet bounces a touch, says just that much anyway. 

[mermaidsirennikita]

any HR recs where the heroine thinks the hero is a fuckin loser and he has been in love with her the entire time? 👀

Lmaooooo I love this

Waking up with the Duke by Lorraine Heath--the "bro, as a bro, could you put a baby in my wife (bro)?" book and my favorite Lorraine. The hero is known to be this very smooth, gentlemanly, discreet rake, but the heroine (understandably) views him simply as the guy who got drunk and caused an accident that left his best friend (her husband) paralyzed. When the hero is asked to impregnate her, his first reaction (after "WHAT") is "dude she cannot STAND me".

The Earl Takes All by Lorraine Heath--the gorilla twins book, which hinges on the fact that not only the heroine, but everyone who knows the hero, thinks he's a loser. His obituary (he's obviously not actually dead) is like "GOD.... THAT GUY, AMIRITE?"

The Dueling Duchess by Minerva Spencer kinda has this vibe, as the heroine is a very hardcore woman and the hero is a rake who initially is like you're soooo important to me that I want to keep you as my mistress" and she's like ".... IDIOT"

Barbarbian's Mate by Ruby Dixon, my favorite Ice Planet Barbarians book I've read so far. Our heroine really wants a mate, but when it turns out to be this guy she's like "I'D RATHER DIE". I mean he is kind of a loser, but he's a very competent loser!!!!

The Duke Gets Even by Joanna Shupe. Sorta these vibes--like, she very much loves him back, but she's also like "JESUS CHRIST WE SAID WE WOULDN'T DO THIS YOU MORON".

The Perfect Crimes of Marian Hayes by Cat Sebastian. Hero literally begins by sending the heroine a blackmail letter and they snarkily correspond and he falls in love with her over said letters. (The Queer Principles of Kit Webb has another vibe like this but it's m/m.)

Unmasked by the Marquess by Cat Sebastian. The hero and the nb lead are best friends, and they do begin having sex, but he's under the impression that this is leading to Something and THEY do not have that impression, so he likes... proposes right after fucking them against a wall and they're like "oH MY FUCKING SHIT" and wheel on him listing all the reasons he's a bisexual disaster. They're not... wrong.

The Bride Goes Rogue by Joanna Shupe. Heroine made the initial move in this relationship, he turned her down, she hates him, then they begin a no strings thing... and then he proposes but in a way that is very "... WHAT ELSE IS THERE?" (The Swan Princess) and she fucking. Devastates him. I laugh every time.

The Earl I Ruined by Scarlett Peckham. Perfect for this; hero has been in love with heroine for years (she's his best friend's little sister) and she thinks he's an idiot w a stick up his ass. (He in fact... a dom.)

It Happened One Autumn by Lisa Kleypas. More like "he's been in lust with her this whole time", but her shock is still huge.

No Rest for the Wicked by Kresley Cole. This is a great example of that in paranormal. The heroine is an emotionless warrior, hero is the scholarly vampire who adores her and walks through blood for her but she is like "my god, how embarrassing".

Eleven Scandals to Start to Win A Duke's Heart by Sarah MacLean has a heroine who is.... so embarrassing.... (I love him) (But God)

[jojo-reader-hell]

Hello Bad Children I am Too Gay™️ for Erina Pendleton-Joestar and You Can’t Fucking Stop Me.

Erina Pendleton x Fem!Reader: Just Gals Being Gays

“Lady Erina and her friend are inseparable, the bond they share is that of sisters!”

Oh.

Oh you sweet summer child...

Both of you weren’t really high class growing up, but you went to the same school and grew up close together in the countryside.

Love began when you were children. You always played together, you would have tea together and run off to the fields to play house. Without missing a beat you told her you could be her wife and take care of the “babies” (your dolls).

Once when you were playing house with your dolls, Erina asked innocently if she could kiss you. That wasn’t so strange since in the game you were her “wife” after all. Quickly you obliged her, the love you shared coming so naturally that neither of you questioned it even once.

You loved her because the sun sparkled in her golden locks and brought out the indigo in her eyes, and because when she looked at you life was worth living all the more. She loved the way the moonlight made your eyes bewitching, calling her like siren song to lay against your chest, and because she could not imagine living life without sharing it with you.

That love never wavered, not even when Jonathan came along and you and Erina discovered you could love him as easily as you loved each other.

You and Erina have been hiding your relationship so well for so many years, no one questions if you both disappear at a party or if you share a room together.

If they see you hanging on her arm? Just gals being pals.

Holding hands in church? Good and pure young girls who believe in the Lord™️.

One time you kissed her goodbye in front of her parents and Jonathan, and nobody batted an eyelash.

You and Erina once disappeared at a ball for nearly four hours, returned with no makeup, and wearing each other’s clothes.

“Oh isn’t Erina such a darling? Her dear friend had an unsightly stain on her gown, so she gave up hers! How generous!”

heLP LORDT.

Robert E. O. Speedwagon is the only chap who knew immediately what the fuck was up.

Became your unofficial big gay brother.

You are his precious bisexual childe and he will die for you and your girlfriend.

When Erina and Jonathan were married they brought you along and no one said a word, after all they planned to be gone on honeymoon for quite some time and needed “a governess”. According to Erina’s father not hell or high water could separate your “sisterly bond”.

It really creeps you both out when you hear those comments and you both scream about it in horror when you’re in bed at night.

You’re the one everyone flocks to like cats to a warm patch of sunlight. If Joseph got in trouble with Granny he ran to you first, crying into your lap and begging to be left off the hook. George II was your Georgie Porgie for the entirety of his life and didn’t sit in his own chair until he was seven, having to do battle with Lisa Lisa over a spot in your lap.

Unfortunately the same tragedy that left Erina a widow and Lisa Lisa an orphan left you paralyzed from the waist down.

Badass that you were, you helped Erina raise two children and a babey Jojo. It was exhausting with two children when you both were younger, it was a common sight to see you fast asleep by the cradles while George and Lisa Lisa crawled all over your lap.

Erina will never divulge the full secret of your injuries, but she knows you have such a devotion to your babies because of what would have been your own little “Jojo”.

Sometimes, if one listens closely, they can hear Erina soothing you with soft words.

“Joanna would have been so proud of Joseph.” You murmur. “Wouldn’t she dearest?”

“Yes darling. She would have been overjoyed to see him married.” Erina whispers back.

Even at the age of 70, Erina will kneel on the ground and lay her head in your lap as you stroke her hair. It’s something you both often did together when you were young. It’s a bit hard for her to get up after nowadays, but you’ll steady her.

Eventually as you both get older she too must rely on a wheelchair to get by, and you both make a very picturesque couple snuggling together in your minks and pearls.

You’re both far more open as you age, but the best part is no one seems to care. It is a rare thing to share such a passionate, humbling love.

[emsylcatac]

A little push

Summary:

Alya asks Chat Noir to record a video of himself encouraging Marinette to confess...to Adrien.

Of course his mouth speaks on its own. Of course he says yes.

Of course his Lady is most likely sure to kill him.

...And of course Marinette feels like she's the one who's about to die.

Read it on AO3

Happy (very late) birthday to @janaikam ♥

I hope you’ll like this post-reveal pre-relationship fic!

A big thank you to Bren, Lisa & Alizeh for beta-reading this you’re all amazing!

* * * * *

“Pound it!”

Adrien looked into Marinette’s eyes as he said it and she did the same, giving him that soft smile of hers that never failed to make him feel better. They lingered a few seconds with their fists touching, searching each other’s eyes knowingly.

Even though it had been months since they’d discovered each other’s identities, they couldn’t help but share a special glance that said, ‘I know who you are now’.

They disconnected their fists and turned towards the victim of the day—a woman in her thirties—who was slowly gathering her bearings. Marinette walked towards her and helped her stand up, offering words of reassurance.

Adrien watched her fondly before joining her and giving the woman a pep talk himself, until she left, thanking them once again.

“Well, Kitty, we did good today, eh?” Marinette said, nudging him with her elbow.

Adrien laughed. “Of course we did, we’re unstoppable! But I think you should go, you’re about to detransform soon,” he winked.

“Olala, I should hurry! Wouldn’t want you to find out my oh-so secret identity super top secret!”

They both giggled, Adrien shaking his head. “I’ll see you in class on Monday,” she whispered, and dropped a kiss on his cheek before flying away.

He touched his cheek and stared at her retreating form. He was about to let yet one of his all too recurrent lovesick sigh when a voice called out to him.

“Pssst, Chat Noir!”

He turned his head, only to be met by Alya’s grinning face and waving hand. He beamed at her, noting that he still had enough time left if she wanted a small interview.

“Well well well, if that isn’t our ever-so always intrepid Ladyblogger!”

Alya took that as a sign that she could come and talk to him, laughing all the way.

“Please, call me Miss Ladyblogger, The Most Intrepid And Greatest Reporter Of All Time, and not to brag, also personal favourite citizen of our local heroes themselves, between you and me.”

“Oh, my bad,” Adrien chuckled. “What do you need of me? An interview? A selfie featuring my best winning smile? Or,” he dropped his voice conspiratorially, a hand around his mouth, “pictures of Ladybug falling in the fountain because she was scared of…a ladybug?”

Alya laughed. “Actually, I had a favour to ask from you, but if these pictures are still on the table… how much would you want for them?”

Adrien winked. “Give me a croissant and I’m your cat, if you don’t tell Ladybug about your sources, of course.”

She smirked. “Of course. It’s a deal. I’ll have your croissant same time, same place tomorrow.”

“Lovely. Now what was it you needed of me, before my time is up?”

“Oh. So this is gonna sound really weird but...Okay. So my best friend is a fan of yours; her name’s Marinette, I don’t know if you’ve heard of her?”

Adrien bit back a laugh and tapped his bell. “Rings a bell, must have met her once or twice. Admirable citizen, just like you!”

“Why, thank you,” she said, falsely flattered. “Well. So Marinette is trying to hype herself up to confess to the boy she loves—”

Oh.

“—but she’s always had troubles, you know? Except now she told me that she really wanted to do it, and I’m so proud of her! She has been in love with our friend Adrien for so long now—”

OH.

Adrien’s brain short-circuited after that, and Alya was talking, and probably saying very interesting things, but what was it about Marinette loving him?!

“—So, could you do that? It would really mean a lot to her! ...Chat Noir?”

He startled, trying to reconnect with reality, and was met with Alya’s confused frown.

“Sorry,” he said—because yes he could still speak, which was great, wasn’t it?—“I didn’t quite catch that last part. Could you repeat, please?”

“Oh! Yes, so I was wondering—since I’ve heard from akuma victims and Ladybug herself that you give the best pep talks and since Marinette holds you high in her esteem— if you would agree to give her a few encouraging words while I record you? I want it to be a little surprise for her.”

Oh. Now that was a funny situation.

...A very, very embarrassing situation he had no idea how to get out from.

Was it true? Was Marinette really in love with him? It made sense, in a way, he reasoned.

It would explain a lot of things.

But what would Marinette think if she saw him, Chat Noir him, making a video for her to confess to him, Adrien him?!

...She would probably hate him forever.

“...Chat Noir?” Alya’s voice brought him back on Earth once again. She was looking at him with what he assumed were the best pleading puppy eyes she could muster, and he’d be lying if he said it wasn’t working. Now he knew why Marinette couldn’t say ‘no’ to Alya and vice-versa.  “Could you do it? Please please please please pleeeaaaase? I’ll bring you another croissant! And Marinette really deserves it, you can’t deny her that—”

“Sure.” He heard his voice speak. Oh no. “I would love to!” Sometimes he wished he hadn’t been gifted with the ability to talk.

Alya let out a happy squeal, pulling out her camera. It almost convinced him that he had made the right decision in agreeing. Almost. “Thank you, Chat Noir, you’re the best! Marinette is going to be so happy after seeing it, no way she won’t nail her confession!”

“Hahaha…yeah...no way…”

Marinette was going to be mad at him. He didn’t know whether he should warn her or not; call her or not.

But one thing he was sure of, he was not at all ready to face her after that.

“So when you’re ready,” he gave an awkward thumbs up, “on the count of three… One...two...three...aaaand action!”

Adrien stared at the red indicator light on Alya’s camera, feeling like a deer caught in headlights. It was a terrible feeling. If a deer miraculous existed, he was sure very glad that he wasn’t its owner.

Alya nodded at him, reminding him that he had to speak.

“So,” he brought a hand to his neck, rubbing it awkwardly, “um, hello, M-Marinette, as you can probably see, this is Chat Noir! I’m here to tell you that...to tell you that...that…” He took a deep breath, trying to summon confidence he wasn’t sure he possessed at the time, and looked straight into the camera. “I’m here to tell you that I believe in you. I know you’re an amazing person and—”

* * * * *

“—you’ve been proving that you were very brave the few times that I met you. What I mean is...trust in yourself, and I’m sure your confession to...to that boy…”

“—Adrien,” Alya’s voice added in a harsh whisper.

“...Right. That boy A-Adrien will be very...very happy to hear it. I mean, you saying it, yeah he’ll be, um. Overjoyed. I think. Probably. So good luck and, uh...be happy.”

Marinette stared at her phone screen as the video ended, stopping on Chat Noir’s awkward finger guns with a face that clearly screamed like he just wanted to drown himself into the Seine, a sentiment she was currently sharing with him.

She couldn’t move for the next few minutes, replaying his words in her head. She didn’t dare to press “play” again and feel the embarrassment she was already feeling more and more a second time.

It was sweet of Alya, really. And well thought out. And Marinette probably would have loved the attention if the person she was planning on confessing to wasn’t the one encouraging her in this stupid video.

“Marinette?” she faintly heard Tikki’s voice calling out to her.

“I’m gonna die. No, wait… I’m already dead.” And with that, she dropped her phone on the floor and threw herself unceremoniously onto her bed, an arm covering her face.

“Marinette, this is great!” Tikki squealed. Marinette violently pulled her arm away to look at her. “Chat Noir said Adrien would be overjoyed to hear your confession!”

“Tikki. He said that ‘Adrien’,” she quoted the name with her fingers, “will probably be overjoyed. Keyword: probably. Keyface: the desperate one he was throwing at the camera screaming ‘please let me die’. How is any of this great, uh?”

Tikki didn’t answer right away. “Well,” she spoke in a timid voice, “if you’re both gonna die, then at least you’ll be together?”

Marinette knew Tikki was always trying to be optimistic, but this was a little much.

Tikki sighed. “Listen, I know it looks embarrassing—”

“—understatement of the century—”

“—but now you have the hardest part of your confession already done! All you have to do is call him or wait for him to call and—”

Marinette gasped and straightened up suddenly. “HIM TO CALL!” she screamed, and grabbed her phone.

When it was clear that no new notifications had appeared, she released a loud sigh to alleviate the pressure and fell back on her bed dramatically.

“Tikki. He hasn’t called. Or left any messages.”

“Maybe he’s waiting for you to do it?”

“Maybe.” Maybe not.

Marinette continued to stare at the ceiling, a thousand thoughts running through her head, all catastrophic.

“Tikki,” she called again. “He’s never gonna love me, isn’t he?”

“You know that’s not true.”

Marinette ignored her kwami. She grabbed her Chat Noir plushie that was snuggled up against her cat pillow, held it in front of her, and caressed the side of its ear and hair with one hand.

“All I want is to get lost in his emerald green eyes,” she almost sniffed, “pet his cute little kitty ears,” she rubbed the doll’s cat ear between her fingers, “and...and kiss his adorable kitty nose,” she bopped its nose, “and hold him close to me,” and she hugged the doll close to her chest.

“Marinette, don’t you think that you’re being a little dramatic here?” Tikki’s voice pulled her out of her reverie.

She glared at her, straightened up and shoved the doll into the kwami’s face.

“Tikki. There is nothing dramatic when it comes to this boy and my feelings for him.” She brought back the plushie close to her and lowered her voice. “I love you Adrien,” she murmured, before dropping a kiss on its forehead with a loud mwah.

Tikki sighed. “Well, now that you just practiced your confession and are ready for next time you see him, off to bed!”

Marinette pouted and gave her a distraught look.

Tikki’s expression turned kinder and more tender. “I’m sure everything is going to be perfect, Marinette. You don’t have to worry.”

“I hope you’re right, Tikki,” she answered while the kwami nuzzled her cheek. “I hope you’re right.”

* * * * *

“Are you finally going to tell me where we’re going?” Marinette asked again.

“Nope,” Alya grinned. “This is going to be fun, I promise.”

Marinette groaned playfully, the bag of croissants her best friend had asked her to bring swinging at the rhythm of her pace. It was a nice morning, and it was sunny for once in Paris. Marinette might not have slept a lot that night, but Alya’s overjoyed mood was lifting up her spirit.

...Until a realisation hit her and she suddenly stopped walking. “You’re not going to bring me to see Adrien, are you? Because you, dragging me on a Sunday morning, with croissants...”

Alya just laughed. “Of course not, silly. That’s you and only you who will have to decide when you meet up with him. I think I’ve done my part already,” she winked.

“Your par—oh. The video.”

“Yes, the video, the last little push you needed to have the most perfect and grand love confession that love history itself has never heard!” Alya dramatically said while making wide gestures with her arms, which would have amused Marinette greatly were it not for the tight knot she could still feel in her stomach from the previous day.

She forced a laugh. “Hahahahahaaa, yes it was very nice of…of Chat Noir to accept and…”

“Oh my god, Marinette,” Alya interrupted her. “Chat Noir was such a sweetheart. I wasn’t expecting him to accept but it was really nice of him.”

“Ooooh, yes yes, veeeery very nice of him, he really shouldn’t have,” Marinette nervously nodded.

“Right?! He probably had tons of other things to do but he still chose to take the time for us,” she kept on gushing.

Marinette thought she must have nodded dumbly after that. Talking about Chat Noir and the video just reminded her that he knew now and that she had no idea about what he thought of it.

That she had yet to officially confess—that she had yet to face him.

And somehow, the fact that he knew that she was in love with him when she hadn’t even told him herself, well… It felt more stressful than any surprise confession she could have planned.

“...and he even said that you were an admirable citizen, by the way,” she heard Alya’s voice talking to her again.

“Who? Me?”

“Yes, you! And me too, but that goes without saying,” she fake-bragged. “But come on, we’re almost there.” She grabbed her hand and pulled her in a small run, eyes glinting, and Marinette had no other choice but laugh at her best friend’s antics.

They passed by a small shop Marinette recognised as one that was destroyed the previous day during the akuma attack. They turned around a corner she knew would leave them were they defeated that akuma and—

“He’s already here!” Alya gasped.

—Chat Noir was casually leaning back against a wall, seemingly lost in thoughts and inspecting his claws.

...And all of Marinette’s panic came back full force in the span of a second. She was not ready. She was so, so not ready to meet him just yet.

She unknowingly gripped the bag of croissants and Alya’s hand tighter, using the latter as an anchor.

“Hoy, Chat Noir!” Alya waved at him.

Adrien turned his head.

Smiled and waved back.

Looked at her.

Dropped his hand and smile, eyes widening in horror.

Clearly, he too hadn’t expected her. She was probably looking at him with the same horrified look on her face and cursed her inability to pretend that everything was perfectly fine on command.

Luckily, Alya didn’t seem to notice the tension between them.

“I’m glad to see you remember our little deal,” she joked.

Adrien, bless him, quickly schooled his expression into a more neutral one and turned to Alya.

“Of course. A promise is a promise.”

“I’ve got your croissants,” she went on. “All warm of today from the one and only Dupain-Cheng bakery!”

“Wooohhh,” Marinette could hear the forced enthusiasm in his voice, “that sounds de-li-cious!”

He quickly glanced at her, and she averted her eyes immediately.

A nudge from Alya reminded her that she was the one with the bag of croissants and that she was supposed to hand it to him.

She all but shoved it into his face.

Great.

“Oops, err, sorry, here,” she apologised, dropping the bag in his hands instead.

“It’s fine, thanks,” he answered quietly.

She didn’t dare to look at him. Maybe he was looking at her, or maybe he was avoiding her, too. It felt awkward.

It felt so wrong.

Wouldn’t he look overjoyed if he was in love with her and just learned she loved him back? Wouldn’t he?

Alya’s voice pulled her out of her spiralling thoughts. “So, do you have my merchandise, hm?”

Marinette looked up to Adrien who seemed to be startled from his own thoughts, too. “Of course,” he zipped down his pocket, “here. It’s all on this USB key.”

He gave Alya a wink for good measure.

“Thank you, you’re the best!”

“What’s on it?” Marinette asked, more to pretend that she was invested in whatever was happening than out of real curiosity.

“Ah-a! That’s for me to know and you to never found out,” Alya wiggled her eyebrows. “Oh by the way,” she gave a small movement of the head in Adrien’s direction, “what did you think of the video?”

Marinette’s eyes widened in horror and she looked into Adrien’s eyes to see him looking back at her absolutely...terrified. She couldn’t find a better word to describe it.

He looked….he looked terrified.

...He really had moved on, hadn’t he? She was too late, and the idea that he would have to reject her terrified him, wasn’t it?

Marinette tried to control her emotion and keep the tears she could already feel prickling her eyes from escaping.

“The...the video?” she said timidly. “The one you sent me yesterday with Chat Noir?”

Alya nodded enthusiastically. Adrien was offering a tentative smile but she could see how much it was costing him to do it.

“Oh yes I hope… I hope it’s gonna help you,” he murmured in a trembling voice.

...She couldn’t do it right now. Internally cursing herself for being a stupid coward or some other name she didn’t even had in mind, she took a deep breath and summoned the cheeriest voice she could muster.

“Ooooh hahahaha, yes it was very nice of you and um, and a good surprise! But pfffeeew, it wasn’t necessary at all, I mean! I loved that you took your time for me but… I’m totally over Adrien, hehe. It wasn’t even a big big crush I had you know, just a tiny tiny little feeling, but now it’s all gone into the wind, wooooshh!”

She could feel Alya’s incredulous eyes on her, and saw the small smile Adrien had been trying to maintain completely disappear.

“But… Marinette, what are you saying? Just yesterday you were telling me on the phone that you were head over heels for Adrie—”

“Exactly,” Marinette cut, nodding, “yesterday is suuuuuch a long time ago, things have totally changed now!”

Her statement was met with silence, so she looked awkwardly from Adrien to Alya, and to Adrien again.

Adrien, who looked like a part of his world had just crumbled in front of his very eyes.

“Well,” he said, voice quivering, and she suddenly felt like she was falling from very, very high, “it’s okay.”

It was not.

“I’m glad to know that you’ve made peace with your feelings,”

Oh god no, please no.

“and that you don’t really need my help to...to confess.”

No, no, no...Everything, but not this.

“Chat Noir…” Alya tried to speak, sounding apologetic.

Adrien gave her a wobbly smile.

“Don’t worry, I’m always happy to help, even if things don’t always work out as we hope they would. And it was fun to spend a little time with you two.”

Marinette wanted to speak, but no words would come. She was sure her tears were visible and she tried to convey what she wanted to say with her eyes instead except...she didn’t even know what exactly she wanted to tell him.

Probably it was why she couldn’t form a sound.

Adrien’s eyes met hers for a split second, and he turned around, his back to them.

“Well, if you’ll excuse-me, I have somewhere else to be. I hope you two have a nice day.”

“Chat Noir, wait—”

But he extended his baton and soon disappeared behind a building.

“Wait…” Marinette whispered again, staring at the spot where he had just vanished.

“...Marinette?” Alya tentatively called out to her.

She turned to her best friend and let her tears free to roll on her cheeks.

“Alya... Why do I keep messing up? Why do I keep messing everything up?”

“Oh, girl… It’s okay.”

Alya pulled her in a hug and Marinette let herself cry.

“No, no it’s not. It’s… It’s not. Why did I say all of this? None of it is even true,” she sobbed.

Alya rubbed circles on her back and let her talk her heart out, listening patiently as always.

“You panicked at the idea of admitting again to someone that you loved Adrien?” she finally asked.

It wasn’t exactly that, but Marinette couldn’t really say why, so she just nodded into her neck.

Alya sighed. “I’m sorry, I probably shouldn’t have asked Chat Noir for this video. I thought it would be a good idea, but…”

Marinette shook her head frantically. “It was a great idea Alya, it’s not your fault.” And she meant it: she would have loved the video had Ladybug and Chat Noir not been her and Adrien. “It’s just me, I don’t know why I’m like this. And now, I hurt Chat Noir,” she whispered.

“Forget about Chat Noir right now,” Alya said. “It’s you who’s hurting. I’m sure he’ll understand, he said he had been happy to help anyway. And if you want, we can make a little video to tell him it was a joke,” she teased.

Marinette managed a giggle through her tears, and broke off the hug. Alya kept her hands on her shoulders.

“But seriously. Are you sure it’s only the Adrien thing that is making you cry? I feel like you’ve been more stressed than usual lately.”

She shrugged; she didn’t even know the answer to that.

“You know what?” Alya said, tone a little less consoling and a little cheerier. “I declare today as a girls day, and a make-Marinette-feel-better-day. So we’re going to have a nice lunch in a nice little restaurant, and then we’ll go to the cinema, how does that sound?”

Marinette finished to wipe her tears. “That sounds great Alya, thank you so much. I couldn’t have asked for a better best friend, you know... You’re always there for me.”

Alya laughed and gave her a side-hug, dropping a kiss on her cheek. “Oh you could. You could have been me and have you as a best friend.”

That made her laugh. She still had to talk to Adrien, but for now she was glad to forget a little about him.

* * * * *

It had taken quite some time for Marinette and Adrien to get used to each other’s identities. They had been fumbling with their words a lot, overthinking each of their moves. It was a sort of out-of-body experience to merge two persons you viewed as two different entities into only one, and it had taken some time to really click in their mind and adjust their newfound dynamic.

So yes, it hadn’t been short, but they had gotten there—they had found a common, safe compromise.

But now, as Marinette anxiously watched Adrien’s back as he was packing his bag before leaving for lunch, it felt as if all this progress had been destroyed and they were not even back to square one, but to square minus ten.

She purposefully took more time than necessary to clean her table, nodding to Alya to let her know to go ahead and that she would join them at the cafeteria in a few.

And soon it was only the both of them left in the classroom.

Starting a conversation with Adrien had finally felt natural, like starting one with Chat Noir before they knew each other’s identities, yet it had never felt harder than now.

Thankfully, he was the one who took the plunge.

“Marinette? Can I… Can I ask about what happened this weekend?”

His tone wasn’t unkind, far from it, but it was also firm.

“This...this weekend?” she stuttered, cursing herself for pretending she didn’t know what he was referring to.

His expression crumpled a little and he sighed. “You know what I’m talking about. Listen, I’m gonna be honest with you—”

The knot she had in her stomach tightened and she could feel her heart beat faster—the kind of beat that wasn’t due to a sudden surge of love, but the one that was fearful of what the turn of events might be.

“—but sometimes, you confuse me. I mean, it got better now that we know, but there are times I don’t know what you think and…” he sighed again, and ruffled his hair.

Marinette kept staring at him; he was right.

“And this weekend, I finally thought I had figured it out, but then you…”

“I’m sorry,” she murmured.

Adrien shook his head, looking like he was the one feeling sorry. He took a step towards her, and brought a hand to her face, gently putting some strands of hair behind her ear. “It feels like you don’t trust me with your feelings, my Lady,” he almost breathed. “I’ve always told you how I felt, or if something was bothering me...even if I’ve been more than clumsy about it at times.”

Marinette said nothing.

“I’m just asking you for the same honesty.”

He dropped his hand from her face but kept maintaining her gaze. His look was intense, expectant, but oh so disheartened.

“I’m sorry,” she finally mumbled again, because words still wouldn’t work.

His expression turned to a resigned one, and her heart broke a little.

“You know that you’re my best friend and that I’ll never think badly of you no matter what?” he said, before turning around.

“Adrien...wait—”

His phone rang.

“It’s the Gorilla. He’s waiting for me. I’ll see you after lunch,” and with that, he exited the classroom, leaving Marinette even more frustrated with herself than she had been before.

* * * * *

It’s precisely because something is important that it’s important to say, no matter what.

She had lost count of how many times she had repeated this in her head ever since Chat Noir had told it to her. She had often been close, so close to follow it and say what was on her heart.

So close... But she had never achieved it.

Marinette took a deep breath. Exhale.

Adrien was in the locker room, alone. All the other students had gone back home now, but a fencing lesson after class had held him up.

She had waited the entire lesson—she knew he would come by the locker room at the end to take some school books.

“Adrien?” she called timidly.

He stopped what he was doing, a hand on the locker door. He didn’t turn around.

How many times had she imagined confessing to him?

How many times had she planned her confession to him?

How many times had it all failed…?

Confessions don’t plan themselves, she figured. They just happen when they happen.

“I know you’re probably still frustrated with me, but...there are things I want to tell you.”

Hello Marinette; as you can probably see, this is Chat Noir.

“First of all...I’m sorry. For yesterday; for being confusing to you. For being a coward,” she whispered the last word.

I’m here to tell you that I believe in you.

“The truth is… I’ve always been afraid to open my heart, and especially to you.”

She couldn’t read his expression, but he hadn’t moved, his back still to her.

She took a step forward.

“Which is stupid, of course, because you’re my partner and there’s probably no one I trust more than you.”

You’re an amazing person—

Another step.

“But I think that’s because you’re so important to me that I’m scared to be honest with you. Because once I tell you…”

—and you’ve been proving that you were very brave.

“Once I tell you, you’ll know everything about me. And that’s terrifying.”

Trust in yourself.

“You told me once that it was because something was important to say that it was important to say it. No Matter what. Well. I have something important to tell you.”

She took another step, so she was standing right behind him now.

I’ll be happy to hear it.

“I love you, Adrien,” she whispered, and hugged him from behind.

You, saying it. I’ll be overjoyed.

“I love you,” she repeated louder into his back.

Good luck and…

She untangled herself from him. “I love you,” she said firmly, confident, one last time.

...Be happy.

Adrien turned around.

And he had the brightest smile she’s ever seen on his face, tears glistening at the corner of his eyes. Just like that, hers that she hadn’t noticed forming ran on her cheek and she let out a choked giggle. She threw herself at him, her arms around his neck.

He caught her easily and hugged her back just as tightly.

“Thank you for being honest with me,” he whispered into her hair. “I love you too. So, so much.”

She hugged him tighter, and put her hand in his hair, massaging it.

They stayed like that a few minutes, gently swaying.

Then, Marinette loosened her grip on him to look into his eyes. She slid her hand from his shoulder to his arm to his hand to link her fingers through it, but kept her other one in his hair.

She could almost feel him shivering.

They nodded at each other, knowing what they wanted.

And then their lips met. Softly, lingering but not pushing.

Marinette was aware of everything that was him, that felt him: his hair, that she was still caressing with her hand. His arm around her, with his hand slowly running up and down her back.

His other hand, still tangled with hers, slightly pressing more and more as the kiss went on. It sent waves of shivers throughout her body.

And his lips and breath on hers.

They broke the kiss, giddy smiles on their faces. Marinette grabbed his face then and kissed his nose.

Adrien laughed. “What was that about?”

“I wanted to kiss your kitty nose.”

He snorted. She giggled, and climbed on her tiptoes once more to kiss his laugh.

Once. Twice.

Three times.

He kissed her back each time.

“I’m sorry about this video. It must have put you in a tight spot,” she said after the third kiss.

Adrien whined. “I am the one who’s sorry. I had no idea what to do and I thought you were going to kill me.”

“I thought I was going to kill myself when I saw it,” Marinette exclaimed. “And then Tikki said that at least we’d be happy and dead together!”

Adrien burst out laughing. “I’d rather be happy and alive with you for now, if that’s okay.”

Marinette nodded frantically. “Oh yes me too. It was a good video though. It did help me in the end.”

“Yeah?” he asked, sounding hopeful.

“Yeah. And from now… I’ll make sure that you know what I feel about you.”

He gave her one of his soft smiles, one of her favourite smiles of his. “Promise?”

“Promise.”

And she sealed it with another kiss.

.

.

.

_____________

Bonus scene:

Adrien watched Marinette out of the corner of his eyes. She was calm, sipping her tea.

But something was wrong. He could feel it.

Maybe it was in the way she was so casually drinking, almost ignoring him. Maybe it was because she still hadn't reacted to the pictures of her, Ladybug her, falling head first in the fountain that Alya had released the previous day—with the bright grand title "Ladybug vs ladybug? It's more likely than you think."

Maybe it was a little bit of both.

Marinette brought her tea one last time to her lips, and put the cup on the desk.

"You feeling good Chaton, uh?" she asked in a calm voice. Calm, but with a tone that either meant "all is good" or "all is wrong".

It was terrifying. He gulped.

"Yes?"

She nodded. "Good."

His right leg was rapidly bouncing up and down in anticipation. Marinette grabbed her phone and tapped a few things on it, before putting it back on the table.

His phone rang.

She was looking at her nails, casually rubbing them with her thumb. Adrien raised a brow and looked at his own phone.

One new message. From Marinette.

A link. And a caption that just said: '😘'

He clicked on it. A tab to the Ladyblog opened.

He felt a wave of dread slowly washing over him as the page loaded.

And suddenly, in bright, grand title was written:

"Five Times Chat Noir Was Scared By A Passing-By Cat, And The One Time He Fell Into The Seine."