#how is robin supposed to keep her feelings to herself when she always felt so unloved as a child? how could she refuse to let someone know

[imthursdaysyme]

It’ll pass series 1/5: ronance

[brucewaynehater101]

What if Tim was a meta with ability to erase and change people's memories (like Pudding from One Piece) and when he felt like he had to disappear he erased memories of himself from Batfam's minds??

Ye!

The batfam become confused af as well. They feel something is missing. There's a hole in their lives, but they can't tell what it is. They can't tell that their memories are missing because Tim erased the memory of the third Robin from everyone's minds.

Despite having no recollection of Tim (and despite him deleting all evidence that says contrary), everyone still feels his absence.

Alfred, for some reason he can't place, keeps setting an additional plate down for dinner. He finds himself buying Zesti flavors none of the Waynes like.

Jason feels an odd sort of grief when he notices his jacket is still draped over the back of the couch where he left it.

Bruce finds himself drowning in work despite the workload being the same as it always is. He goes to send his analysis of an interesting cold case but pauses at the contact name.

Cass knows, to the very being in her bones, that her family isn't whole. She just doesn't know why.

Duke finds himself dropping by Wayne Enterprises during his dayshift, but he doesn't know where he wants to go. He's also bothered by the window in the CEO office being locked how it's supposed to be.

Titus won't stop whining as he sits in front of a bedroom in the family wing that's always been empty.

For some reason, Barbara has every other Tuesday night completely empty. Despite her hectic schedule and her needing that time to get work done, she can't bring herself to fill it.

Damian is getting so frustrated every time he tries to paint. There's a face he keeps drawing, but it's blurry. He doesn't know who it is, and he doesn't know why it causes him to feel so much.

Steph cracks a smile when she sees a brick but doesn't know why. There's a plethora of inside jokes she knows but doesn't understand. None of the other Bats react to them either.

Dick stares at the photo of himself with his parents and two strangers. He thought his mourning had lessened over the years. He still feels it, but he usually remembers the good times when he looks at this picture. Now, it's as if he's feeling their loss anew. He's grieving, but somehow, he knows it's not about them. He doesn't know what else it could be.

[wolfjackle-creates]

Answer My Call Chapter 2 Part 1

What's this? Two posts for WIP Wednesday??? I said I was gonna spoil you guys. Now, I originally planned to do Carry Your Heart. Figured the top and bottom choices from the WIP Wednesday poll would be fun. But both stories are at a point where Danny is taking Jason to Frostbite and I just didn't feel like writing the same scenario twice, even if the details and POV are totally different.

So I went to the third place option.

If you want a say in what I work on this week, check out the poll!

Story Summary: Jazz, Sam, and Tucker manage to help Danny escape the GIW, but they can't follow him and are under too much surveillance to communicate with each other. Sam snuck Danny a phone as he ran and Jazz sends him a text every day, hoping to hear he is all right. But he's not the one getting the texts.

Jason was away for several months on a mission with the Outlaws. When he finally returns home, he is surprised to find dozens of messages from an unknown number begging a Danny to tell her he's okay. Looks like there's not going to be a break between missions this time around.

Chapter 1: AO3 (user locked), Tumblr

Word Count: 1.5k

-----

Jazz tapped her finger on her phone as she waited for the Dunkin employee to call out her order. Red Hood was supposed to arrive any minute. She’d left her dorm a full two hours ago and led Agents K and O on a merry chase through Boston before finally losing them at Quincy Market. Then she’d doubled back and was now near Northeastern. She had no reason to be here, so hopefully it’d take a little longer to track her down.

And that’s when she felt it—a ghost or liminal was nearby.

Pushing his way in the building was a tall man with a red beanie covering dark hair. He had on an unbuttoned flannel jacket over a Dumpty Humpty T-shirt and jeans with a backpack slung over one shoulder. He glanced around before his eyes settled on her and he grinned.

“Hey, Jazz, right?” He held out his hand. “I’m Todd.”

Jazz couldn’t say anything and just stared in horror. Red Hood couldn’t be liminal. Had she just led another liminal to the guys in white? Did he even realize he was considered an ecto-entity under the anti-ecto acts she’d introduced him and Red Robin to?

“Jazz? Are you okay?” he asked, dropping his hand.

“Order for Jazz!” called out the barista.

Jazz shook herself and grabbed her drink with a smile for the employee. Then she grabbed Todd’s elbow and dragged him over to the tables.

“Sorry, I just wasn’t expecting—” she cut herself off. She had no idea what he knew and what he didn’t. And the agents could come get them at any moment. Instead she pulled out her phone started turning off every security setting. “Never mind. Do you want anything?” she asked with a gesture at her own drink.

“I’m all right. But, are you? What happened?”

Jazz let out a laugh; if the way Todd’s eyes widened was any indication, it was a tad more hysterical that she would’ve liked. “Nothing. Absolutely nothing happened.” She looked down at his shirt. “My brother loves Dumpty Humpty, you a music fan?”

He seemed nonplussed at the topic change but shrugged. “Sure. Music is good, but I stole this shirt from one of my brothers. I don’t know if I could name a single song by them. How about you?”

Jazz grinned and forced herself to relax as she logged out of her school email on her phone. “I’m a huge fan of any sort of self-expression, including music. Actually, my plans for tonight involve music, so I hope you like the indie scene. Might be a bit intense for a first date, but I’ve always figured, why not jump right in? Show ‘em the crazy from the start and see if they can keep up.” She leaned forward over the table and winked at him. “Think you’ll be able to keep up?”

Todd played the game perfectly and looked her up and down like they really were about to start a first date. “With you, sweetheart, I’ll follow anywhere you lead.”

Jazz laughed and stood. “Come on, then. We’re going on an adventure.”

Todd grinned and joined her. “Lead the way.”

Once out of the building, Jazz led them away from the university. This being Boston, it wasn’t long before they came across a homeless man begging on the side of the street.

Wincing internally, she gripped Todd’s arm and said loudly, “Honestly, I don’t know why the cops don’t do a better job of keeping away the beggars.”

Todd looked at her in surprise. “What are you talking about? They have a right to exist and we should help them.”

“They’re probably fine. Everyone knows they only use the money they’re given on drugs and alcohol.” She pretended to glance at her phone before reaching back to shove it in her back pocket. Only to miss so it fell to the ground. “Ew, he’s looking at us. Come on, let’s cross the street.”

She could feel the way Todd tensed at her words, but he let himself be led across the street.

As soon as they were out of hearing shot, he turned to her and hissed, “What the hell was that?”

Jazz glanced back and saw the man picking up her phone. She looked away before he could catch her looking. “Come on, I’ll explain.” She grabbed Todd’s hand and led him down an alley to a much busier street. “I had to ditch my phone. I logged out of everything and left it unlocked so he can use it or resell it. I needed to make sure he wouldn’t try to return it to me and, well, what better way than being the worst person you can imagine?”

And now he was staring, open mouthed.

“They’ve had remote access to my phone for months and I couldn’t let them track us!” she insisted. Habit had her looking around for any sign of a white suit.

“Who can’t find us?”

Jazz shook her head. “The guys in white. Look, this is too public. I can’t say much else here. But meeting you, everything had to change. You’re in danger just by being near me and I refuse to be the reason you get hurt.”

“Why am I in danger?”

“Later!” Jazz hissed before wincing and looking around. She forced a smile back on her face and asked, in as normal a tone as she could manage, “What time is it? Do you know?”

He looked down at his phone. “Uh, looks like it’s almost five.”

“Oh great! Plenty of time for us to get something to eat before I bring you to our surprise destination.”

And from there, Jazz led Todd on a convoluted tour of Boston. They grabbed food at the Pru, then she took him to the green line. Where they traveled four stops before she jumped up in feigned surprise that they were on the wrong branch. So then they got off and hopped on the train going in the opposite direction.

Which was where she wanted to be going all along.

For once, she was happy the orange line was still under construction, because the shuffle of passengers from trains to buses and back just made their journey that much more complicated and harder to follow.

By the time they finally got to their stop, the sun had mostly set. The station was mostly empty and Jazz looked around for any sign of white suits or vans, but even when she didn't see any, she couldn't relax.

“Where are we going?” Todd asked for probably the dozenth time.

Jazz rolled her eyes. “We’ll be there in five minutes and then you’ll find out.”

She led him to the street, the crosswalk had lights over it, but the rest of the road was shrouded in darkness. They ran across without waiting for the walk symbol.

Once they crossed what was basically a divided highway, Jazz led them along the poorly lit and cracked sidewalk. Ahead of them they were approaching a river.

“It’s before the river,” muttered Jazz to herself. “Is this it?” She hesitated at the top of a sloping, unpaved drive that led to an industrial building that sat on the waterfront. “I think so. Apparently this building used to be a coffin factory. Cool, huh?”

“I don’t care for coffins,” was Todd’s terse reply.

Jazz flinched slightly. She knew he was death-adjacent. Should’ve known better than to mention coffins. “Right, sorry. Well, they aren’t made here anymore.” She made her way down the steep drive, Todd a step behind her.

“What is it now?”

“Apartments, I believe.”

Once at the bottom, she looked around and saw the old loading dock. Entering, she looked for the door on the left.

Only to hesitate once more. Two doors were on the left. She hadn’t heard anything about there being two doors. Taking a chance, she opened the first one.

Inside was a table where two women sat in front of a metal box. On the wall were a set of pegs already mostly filled with coats. And inside milled probably thirty or forty people.

The women smiled at Jazz. “Hi, have you two been here before?”

Jazz shook her head and pulled two twenties out of her wallet. “No. But I had a classmate come here and tell me about it. When I realized you had something going on tonight when I had a date? Figured it was a great place to come with my partner!”

She laughed. “We’re definitely unique here at the Night Cap.” She stamped their hands. “Show starts in half an hour, but feel free to mingle until then. Bathroom’s through the kitchen.”

“Thanks! We’re looking forward to tonight.”

Todd nodded his own thanks and followed Jazz into the room.

“What are we doing here?” he whispered in her ear.

“Hiding,” she whispered back. “I’ve never been here before. Never even taken this stop on the T before. When we leave here, we’ll get a motel room or something and I’ll tell you everything.”

“Is this necessary?”

“Without a doubt.”

Jazz could tell Todd didn’t fully believe her, but he dropped it. Jazz found a few people who were discussing that evening’s performers and the two of them joined the conversation.

-----

Part 2

I no longer do tag lists, but please check out the Subscription Post if you want notifications when I update.

So, I had a lot of fun with this section. The place Jazz takes Jason to? Real place. Though Night Cap isn't what the residents call it. Honestly, the real name is also impossible to google. If you don't know it exists, you would never find it (why Jazz runs from the GIW there). Out of respect for the residents of the apartment, though, I changed the name. I went to a show there and it was super weird trying to find it. Like, the directions in my email seriously said "enter the loading dock of the former coffin factory, find the door on the left, and slip the person standing there $10-20 cash. Don't touch anyone's personal belongings, please."

As we waited for the bathroom during set break, two of the residents were cooking dinner at the stove and we were chatting about how Regan was the worst.

10/10 would go again.

Anyone who has spent any time in Boston knows what I mean about the T being under construction. Annoying as hell, but it worked out for Jazz this time.

(The T is the name of the Boston train/subway system.)

The Pru refers to the Prudential building. The bottom level(s) are full of restaurants and shops (basically a high end shopping mall) and upper levels are offices. The top level is an observation deck that's open to the public, though I've never been.

[yall-batman-fanfic]

Children of the Bat | Bruce Wayne/Batman x Magician!Reader

Synopsis: More than ten years into their marriage, Bruce surprises Vivian with a son he never knew he had with Talia Al’Ghul. As Damian makes his claim in their home, Vivian is at a crossroads, questioning her husband’s loyalty and believing his faithfulness to his wife. As Bruce tries to convince Vivian that he is never unfaithful, Damian makes it hard by destroying a sacred space for the husband and wife.

Featuring the Super-family.

Vivian had a superstitious belief that if the universe was giving her so many good things, it’s preparing her for the big bad day it would come. 

Ever since she met Bruce Wayne, so many good things have happened to her that she kept waiting for that one bad day to come. When she first, officially met Bruce she told him this silly belief but he told her to not worry and enjoy the present. That she deserves the good things she was receiving, that it wasn’t some ploy of the universe to give her all the good things to prepare her for the worse. 

She believed him and for ten years she had nothing but happiness with him, sure there were bad days, such as their supposed break-up, but in that span of ten years she was happy. She had a loving boyfriend, a boy who she could call a son, a man who was like a father to her, and it all became even better when Jason came along. A boy with a troubled past. Bruce brought him in in hopes to keep him from descending further in the dark underbellies of Gotham, and while Bruce saw potential as a Robin, Vivian saw a son. 

Sure, she knew Bruce also saw Jason as his adopted son, but to him, Jason was Batman’s Robin. His soldier. His partner. With Vivian Jason Todd was her son first. Her boy.

There was a running joke in the Wayne Manor whenever Dick would mope on how Jason was closer to Vivian than he ever was. 

“You, Young Master Dick, were Master Bruce’s boy,” said Alfred, “Yes, you were close with Professor Pryor, but you were always close with Master Bruce. Young Master Jason, on the other hand, is Professor Pryor’s boy. He’s very much more attached to her than you were his age. No need to mope about it, Master Dick, Professor Pryor shares an equal love for you and Jason.”

“Really? Hard to believe.”

“Well, if you weren’t such an angry and moody little boy, maybe you wouldn’t be moping and seeking your mother’s attention constantly.”

Yes. Jason was her boy. 

Then tragedy happened: The Joker took her boy from her. 

Learning the news from Bruce nearly had her breaking down at her classroom when he called her about it. Her students and colleagues tried to console her but Vivian was inconsolable. Even Bruce cannot console her. When she saw Jason’s body in the morgue, she tried so hard to feel him again using her magic but nothing. She felt nothing. 

Heartbroken, Vivian went down the spiral she gone when she lost her mother and opened the old books she had in the mystic arts and dark magic. He tried to stop her, but her rage towards the Joker was too much. One night, while on duty in Gotham, Bruce received a call from Gordon that the Joker was having a seizure, and Bruce instantly knew who was the cause. Driving back to the manor, he saw Vivian in one of the rooms, sitting in the middle of the circle as she tortured the Joker in his already mad mind. She saw everything, how he tortured her boy, how Jason kept a brave face, and how he locked him in the warehouse with a ticking time bomb.

She wanted to kill him for doing that to her boy, but then she heard Bruce’s voice. Begging her to stop, hoping she won’t take that path, reminding her if she kills him she will damn herself to the same place Constantine will go to when he dies. But that didn’t help, she didn’t care if her soul would be damned… what did was hear her husband begging for her to not do it. To not make this mistake.

So she stopped. She released the Joker from her hold, putting him in a coma. He was already in a body cast thanks to Bruce, now he was holding on to a thread because of her. There, she mourned with her husband for the son they lost. 

It took her a while before she could smile again, even with Tim present to bring light to Batman as Bruce descended to a much brutal Batman since Jason’s death. Eventually, she learned to live with the memory of her boy with her. She would always wear the first gift Jason got her for Mother’s Day. It was an antique he found in a store while heading home, he saved the allowance he got from Bruce and bought it just for her. When she opens it she is greeted by the sight of their first photo together in one of the Wayne Foundation’s galas. 

Not wanting to make Tim feel like he was just a soldier for Batman, Vivian opened her heart to him too. She gave him a home and a family, especially when he too lost his own. Things were starting to get better, and it was for a couple of years, until Jason came back and it opened wounds that just healed.

Though he left with his bloody war against Batman and the need to prove to Bruce that his ways were wrong, that the Red Hood can do what Batman cannot, Jason promised Vivian that he will always be there when she needs him. Or when Bruce is being a jerk.

It took a while but eventually, Jason came back to Gotham and became part of Batman’s support once again. He still takes on mercenary missions but he was there and would often have coffee with Vivian at the gardens, and though he would be teased by Dick and Tim, Jason still calls her, “Ma”, just like when he was young.

Things started to look great again with their family whole once more, and things got better when Vivian was given the results she’s been waiting for so long. When she saw the results, Vivian dashed out of campus, drove across town, and barged into his office without a care if he was in a meeting and showed him the test.

She was pregnant.

Overjoyed, Bruce didn’t care if he had the board over, he kissed his wife and celebrated the happy news. While it did ruin the momentum of the meeting, everyone congratulated the Wayne-Pryor couple. 

When news spread about their pregnancy, so many people were sending their congratulations. Dick drove from Bludhaven to Wayne Manor to congratulate his surrogate parents, Jason too came all the way from where he and Roy were doing god-knows-what to congratulate Vivian.

Yes, he stated perfectly clear that he was there for Vivian and just Vivian. He’d care less for Bruce.

While they were able to purchase what they needed, the couple was showered with gifts by their friends and people they never expected to receive from. Lois and Clark used the chance to mess with Bruce by giving them a gender neutral Superman onesie. Actually, everyone in the League thought it would be funny to send clothes and toys that had their own superhero logo as the design. Hell, even Dick made a Nightwing onesie on his own since there was no merch for his vigilante just yet.

Jason and Tim were probably the only ones in their circle that gave practical gifts, such as story books and toys. Tim got the baby a toy computer and Jason got them the Anne of Green Gables set, remembering how Vivian loved those books as a little girl.

Everything was going so well, until the universe thought Vivian was having too much happiness.

Vivian lost the baby.

Five months into her pregnancy, Vivian and many people in Gotham were trapped in one of Two-Face’s crimes. She lost the baby when the man, who was Bruce’s good friend, shot her because the coin told him to.

After realized what had happened, Harvey took control once again of his body and was devastated. He knew Vivian was Bruce’s wife, and he couldn’t believe what he did. So he willingly gave himself up to the police. To Batman. When Batman learned what happened, he nearly beaten Harvey to death if it weren’t for Jim and Robin. 

Vivian was saved but they lost their baby that day. 

She remained silent for weeks, unable to accept what happened. While she retreated in their room, lying in bed, her older sons started packing up the nursery with Alfred’s help, and Bruce…

Bruce dug the grave for the daughter they lost in the garden. He didn’t stop even when rain started to pour. He just kept digging and digging until it was more than six feet deep. He only stopped when Dick and Tim came to tell him that it was enough, and they helped him place the glass box that had held his daughter into the hole and covered it with their bare hands.

When he came to their room that night, he saw Jason sitting next to her in the bed and reading aloud the first book of the Anne of Green Gables series, while she laid her head on his shoulder. Seeing he was finished with his work, Jason placed a kiss on her forehead and left. Bruce expected silence from her again but heard her say: “Helena.”

“What?” He asked, confused.

Vivian got up. She stood before him and held his dirt covered hands and said, “We were still picking names but I fell in love with the name Helena. The one you suggested. I want to name our little girl Helena,” tears fell from her eyes and sobs followed but she continued. “We lost her Bruce… we lost her before we can even hold her.”

Bruce pulls Vivian to his embrace and lets her finally mourn the loss of their daughter. “Helena,” he said the name as if giving life to their little girl but it did nothing. “We may not have been able to hold her but Helena will always be a part of us.”

“I can't feel her,” Vivian cried. “I can't feel her…”

It was her magic that made her more sensitive to the life around them. He only realized how the tragedy of loss really affected her when they first lost Jason. And now she lost the daughter she carried for five months. The daughter they loved so much before she was even born into the world. The daughter who she felt was always with her, and now that life was gone. It felt like a missing puzzle piece that can never be replaced. Empty. Incomplete.

The next day, Vivian asked Tim if he could accompany her to the city where she bought potted flowers which she placed over her daughter's grave. Those flowers bloomed brightly, and seeing them blooming brought her some comfort. 

A few more weeks later she was back to the University, teaching. Her students and colleagues gave their condolences and supported her throughout, which she appreciated, but it was her family that truly helped her slowly fill the emptiness. Ever so slowly, her broken heart was being pieced back together again.

Until the universe thought she was too happy once more.

~*~

The appearance of Talia  al Ghul brought a bad omen to Batman. Everytime he comes across the al Ghuls he knew something bad was going to happen. Another attempt to end the world and reshape it in their vision? Or was Ras planning on another scheme to make him his successor by forcing him to marry Talia? He could list down the possible things they will bring upon him and Gotham, but he never thought of this.

Staring at the boy holding the sword, Bruce couldn't believe his eyes and his ears as Talia said, “This is Damian Wayne, our son.”

“You're lying,” Bruce sneered.

“Oh, I'm not. You may conduct your tests but I assure you, he is yours,” Talia told him. “Do you not remember that night, beloved? When you forgot your vows and gave in to me?”

Bruce glared at the woman. No, he couldn't remember. Nothing was making sense. Was he drugged? Did the League perform magic on him to erase his memories? He didn't know. But the longer Bruce looked at the boy he could see his younger self in him. 

~*~

"You have a son with Talia al Ghul?" Vivian was pacing in the room. "Bruce, he looks like he's eight years old -- we've been married for more than that!"

When he came home with Damian, he had hoped Vivian was still at Gotham University but she was there, in the cave, ready to greet him. With her was Tim who just finished his homework and was to catch up with patrols. She had a big smile on her face until Damian appeared and said, “So, this is the harlot that mother mentioned.”

“Harlot?” Vivian was taken aback by the boy's words. “I'm sorry. Hi, I'm Vivian, who are you, boy-I-never-met?”

Before Bruce can speak, Damian stepped forward with a glare that could kill. “My name is Damian, I'm his son.”

After that, Bruce excused himself and Vivian so they can talk, leaving Damian with Tim and Alfred to watch over. Vivian waited until they were in their room and him removing his cowl and cape before she asked him what was going on. He told her everything, the chase with Croc, Talia's appearance in Gotham, and her revealing that he has a son with her.

"Ten years. Fourteen if you count the time we were still dating," Bruce sighed as he watched her pace around, fiddling with the locket that Jason gifted her, and inside had the petal she preserved from their daughter's garden as a reminder of Helena.

"Not helping your situation,” she said to him.

"I'm trying to remember how and when but I can't.  It's like something is blocking my mind from it."

"But you believed her."

"Yes."

"He does look like your photos when you were a kid," Vivian watched the boy from the window. He and Tim were at the garden now, speaking. The way he walked reminded her of generals walking as they spoke to their soldiers. This was not a normal boy.

"She could have drugged me when it happened," Bruce held her by her shoulders and caressed her neck and up her jaw where she would lean into his touch but this time she avoided it. It pained him to see her like this. Heartbroken. Confused. Doubtful. "Vivian, I was never unfaithful.  I know it's hard to believe now with Damian, and I know that I am the last person to ever ask someone or even you this but please, have faith. I'll figure this out. Vivian, please..." Bruce fell to the ground, kneeling. Still holding her hands as he pressed his forehead on her belly. Begging for her to believe him, to have faith. To say something.

"Bruce, don't," she made him get up and continued to hold him close. "If you believe that that is the case. If you say that you didn't do this willingly, then I believe you. But, please, understand that it will take time for me to not..." she walked away and settled on their bed, hiding her face in her hands as she tried not to cry.

Bruce knelt before her and pried her hands from her face and placed them on his temples. "If it would ease your worries, then read my mind."

"No..." Vivian shook her head.

"Please, if it would make you believe, if it would remove any image in your mind. Do it."

Vivian shook her head. "I won't... because I don't need to."

"If not for you, then for me... help me remember," Bruce told her.

"You're just saying that to justify this. But no. If I do this then what's the point of having trust? If I take that step then you will never trust me again. So, I believe you... but it breaks my heart that she's given you a son and I... I... we've been trying for so long and..."

Bruce brought her to an embrace as the memory of their Helena’s death came back. How she was taken from them by Two-Face. Harvey has begged to see him and Vivian multiple times while at Arkham Asylum. Only he went to see his former friend and listened as he begged for forgiveness. Bruce said nothing the entire time and left.

"If only she was here, if only I did something to save her..." Vivian let out the thoughts  running in her mind since she saw Damian. "If only I saved her."

Bruce held her tight in his arms. "It wasn't your fault. It was never your fault. It was no ones.” But Bruce blames himself. If only he realized sooner then he would have stopped Two-Face before all of this tragedy happened. “And I would never be unfaithful to you because of it. But Damian is here... I won't force you to be there for him like you were with Dick, Jason, and Tim... but he is mine."

Vivian sobbed more as she held on to her husband. "I'm so sorry... I'm sorry that I lost her. I'm sorry."

"You have nothing to be sorry about. We'll get through this. We always do."

~*~

The next few days were not easy. Damian was cold towards her, he kept mentioning his father's choice for a wife did not reach his expectations at all. “I expected someone more like my mother,” he told her, “not someone weak.” That would make Tim call him off and a fight would occur. Bruce would try to stop Damian but the boy had no manners.

Vivian found solace in campus and would purposely stay late just to get away. Bruce noticed her staying longer and understood, so he would be the one to visit her. Bring her gifts or take outs that she likes. In one of his visits, Dick was there. They were talking in the middle of the field where it was just them and he was mostly telling her how the “little brat”, also known as Damian, almost killed a man and almost beat his ass. But he got the kid and tied him up to return to Bruce. All he needed was a bow to complete the set.

Another time he visited her at work, she was on a call with Jason who swore so much that Vivian had to bring her phone away from her ear.

“Is he in a middle of a mission?” Bruce asked her.

“No… Dick and Tim messaged him in their group chat, he knows now about Damian and he called me to check how I was,” Vivian sighed, then returned to the call to tell Jason that she'll call him later. “The rest of that was actually for you.”

“From where? When he said fucking bastard or when he said the asshole?” Bruce placed the food on her desk.

“It started when he called you a fucking-cheating-bastard.”

Bruce sighed. 

“Don't worry,” Vivian placed a kiss on his cheek. “I told him it wasn't really cheating… but you know Jason. He wants proof.”

“Should I be worried about a hit on my head?”

“Yeah, make sure you got your six covered. Roy's a good shot.”

The latest visit he went, Vivian wasn't in the university. Her colleagues said she ran home because of an emergency. Just as they told him, Bruce received a call from Alfred about what had happened.

~*~

Damian had destroyed Helena's garden.

The boy was restlessly training and decided to use the garden as his training dummy. Vivian felt the garden be destroyed as it was connected to the petal in her locket, and she drove straight to the Manor when she felt the pain of loss again. When Bruce arrived, Dick was getting stitches in the Batcave while Damian got knocked out momentarily by Vivian's magic, but as Alfred gave Dick the stitches he needed, the man informed him that Vivian was upstairs packing her things.

“I… I can't be here right now,” she told him as she dumped another stack of clothes into her bag.

“Vivian, please,” Bruce tried to stop her.

“Bruce. I can't… I almost lost control – if I stay here, I don't know what I'll do. Please, just let me.”

“Are you really leaving me?” Bruce asked her.

Vivian fell on their bed, unable to stand, as her emotions became out of control and she could feel everything. Bruce knelt before her and held her hands, knowing that she needed a shield from those beyond their world, but he can't embrace her now. Not when she was hurting like this. Because of him and his son.

“I’m not leaving you, I can't even imagine doing that,” Vivian wiped her tears. “I just need a few days away from this place. I'll stay with Lois and Clark, they said yes when I called them. They're on their way now to pick me up, but I'm meeting them halfway. I already booked a cab.”

Bruce pressed his forehead on her hands to hide the tears that were threatening to fall, but forced them back. Vivian asked him to look at her and he did.

“It'll be fine. We'll be fine,” she tried to smile but failed. “While I'm away, you can focus more on the case and figure out what Talia wants.”

“I'm so sorry, Vivian,” Bruce kissed her hands. “If this is what you want, I'm okay with it. At least you'll be somewhere that's safe… but please, come back.”

“I will,” Vivian kissed his forehead. “I promise.”

~*~

"She's leaving because of me, isn't she?" Damian said after Vivian said a temporary goodbye as she decided to stay with Lois and Clark  in Metropolis to get away for a while.

Bruce looked at his son who avoided his gaze. “Before you came, we lost our daughter. There was an attack in her place of work and she lost the baby there. She was shot by Two-Face while still pregnant with our daughter."

"And seeing me, the son you had with another woman, gave her doubts about your marriage."

Bruce looked down at the boy and said, "We have survived more storms."

"But nothing like this."

"Nothing like this. The flowers you destroyed... that was where we buried Helena. That was Helena's garden, the only place we get to be with the daughter we lost.”

Damian fell silent.

“Come on. We need to find your mother and Slade.”

~*~

Lois and Clark’s home was different from their own in Gotham. Despite Metropolis just one ferry ride away from Gotham, the city was far from Gotham’s crime-ridden streets. Lois once asked her, despite knowing the answer, why they just move out of the city, and Vivian said, “I think it’s the gothic ambiance that keeps people like me in there… or maybe I’m just a masochist. I don’t know.” The two women burst out laughing after that. 

But now, the sight of Vivian sitting on the couch while holding the pendant that had the petal from Helena’s garden was far from the sight of that fun morning coffee between them. Lois and Clark were quite surprised when she called that day, panicking, as she asked if she could stay with them for a while. Normally, she would have gone to her family but the Royces were in Liverpool, and she can’t wait for a ticket to go there. She needed to get out of Gotham now. 

Having heard the cry from Lois’ phone, Clark agreed and offered to pick her up, but Vivian said that she’ll take a cab to their place. It sounded like she didn’t want them to see something in Gotham. Lois didn’t agree with the plan and they ended up with meeting her halfway. The cab fair was still pricey but Vivian didn’t care. As soon as she saw the two by their car, she ran to Lois and cried in her arms.

As soon as they came to the Lane-Kent house, Vivian told them about what happened. She knew Bruce wouldn’t mind, if he did then would have told her not to mention Damian. She told them how Bruce doesn’t remember anything and how the boy destroyed Helena’s garden, and everything was too much for her to stay in Gotham.

She just lost her daughter a few months ago, the wound was still healing and it felt like a knife was stabbed there again and again with the reveal of Bruce’s biological son with Talia, and said son destroying the only place they can be with their daughter.

“I don’t hate him – god, I can’t hate a child – I just – I was just so angry and upset, I used my powers on him and he was knocked out cold. That’s why I had to get out of there before I…” Vivian cried. “I can’t believe I just did that. I can’t believe that I did that again and this time to Bruce’s son.”

“Well, he was a little prick,” Lois muttered.

“Lois!” Clark chastised her.

“Fine,” she sighed. “So, how do you feel about all of this now?”

“I don’t know… I believe Bruce didn’t sleep with her but there is still that image in my mind of them – god,” Vivian drank the whole scotch in her glass, startling Clark. 

Clark was about to hide the bottle, not wanting the woman to get a bad hangover but Lois stopped him and poured Vivian another drink. 

That night, Vivian was unable to sleep. She would get calls from Dick, Jason, Tim, and Alfred to see how she was. As if he knew she couldn’t sleep around this time, Tim thought ahead and sent a little drone to bring her some takeout from that favorite place they would have lunch in Little Italy. When she got the drone-delivery, she saw the video call and Tim smiling sadly that she was far from them all. Alone.

“I’m alright, Tim, I promise,” Vivian said to him through the call.

“I know… Conner told me that you’re sleeping in his room now, and that there’s some snacks in the bottom drawer that he hides.”

Vivian laughed. “Tell him thanks for letting me steal his bed for a couple of days.” 

“Yeah, but he might ask you to help him with his history homework.”

“I’ll do what I can to help him out. Thanks, Tim. This really means a lot.”

“Yeah – wait, hold on,” he groaned.  “-- It’s Jason. He said to stop hogging you because he’s going to call. Yeah, I’m the one hogging you. He’s the one who can’t give me a few minutes to talk to you. Seriously.” Tim was typing furiously on his phone. “Mama’s boy,” he muttered.

“Hey, detective,” she called him using the little nickname she gave him. Just like how she would called Dick  ‘kiddo’ and Jason ‘little bird’  despite them being full grown adults now. It made Tim slightly blush as he remembered the good times whenever she would call him that.  “I love you all equally, okay? Jason’s just the emotional one in the bunch. He needs the extra love,” she joked. “Don’t tell him that.”

Tim laughed. “I won’t… take your time with healing, Viv… but I hope it’s not too long. We miss you here.”

“I miss you too.”

Now, as she sat in the Kent house living room, helping Connor watch over little Jon Kent, Vivian couldn’t help but hold the pendant that had the petal from Helena’s garden. Seeing Jon, holding him, taking care of him brought some sort of comfort for her. Catharsis, maybe? She could only imagine how her little Helena would have been around a few months old now, and while she would still be a baby, she would have taken her to see Jon so they could be close. 

The boy must have sensed her sadness as he got up from where he was drawing on his own pad while Connor did his homework. The five year old turned to her and gave his work with a big smile.

They were flowers.

Seeing the flowers, Vivian couldn’t help but remember her Helena, and for the first time the memory of the daughter she lost brought a smile to her face.

“Yellow,” Jon pointed on the flowers.

“Yeah, they’re yellow flowers,” Vivian got the boy to sit beside her. “In my home, I got a beautiful garden with yellow tulips. It would always bloom in the morning.” She held out her hand and from thin air a yellow tulip appeared, amazing Jon.

“Mine?” Jon asked.

“Yeah, this is yours,” she gave him the flower.

Happy with the gift, Jon hugged Vivian before climbing down to show to his mother the gift he just got. Vivian heard Lois act all amazed as Jon showed her the flower and then looked for a vase to put it in. Getting up, Vivian passed by Conner to mess with his hair and point out the mistake he made on his homework that she saw at a glance, “it’s 1989.”

Connor sighed when he looked for the mistake and then erased the part to correct it, “Thanks!” He muttered.

“We’ll talk about your Dante’s Divine Comedy essay later.”

Connor groaned and huffed. He’ll take the chance to actually get tutored by a historian now rather than with whatever Clark has to offer him. Last time Clark tutored him, he almost didn’t get the required score for his essay.

Coming to the kitchen, Vivian saw Jon sitting on the counter as he marveled on the tulip in the mason jar filled with water. When he saw her coming, he smiled and pointed at the flower again.

“That’s going to be his new obsession for the next couple of days,” Lois said.

“Good thing or bad?” Vivian chuckled. She joined Jon at the counter and held the boy’s shirt to keep him from falling.

“Good because I can’t stand another round of whatever he’s been watching lately. I swear, at work, they would hear me humming to that nursery rhyme.”

Vivian hummed in thought.  “Bruce contacted me earlier.”

“And?”

“He and Damian have finished their mission a few days ago, he just told me now because Tim told him that Jason told him that I told Jason that I’m enjoying my stay here. You know, with babysitting and all.”

“Are you going back?” 

“I think it’s about time. I overstayed my welcome now.”

“Stay longer if you want, I’m mostly in it for the free babysitter,” Lois joked. “But, seriously, Viv, if you need more time. Con is more than willing to start moving his things to the garage.”

“I heard that!” Connor called out.

Vivian laughed. “Don’t worry, Connor, you’ll get your room back tonight.”

Connor appeared in the kitchen, floating, and said,  “but we’re still going to do my English essay, right?”

“Dante?” Lois asked.

“Yeah.”

“Don’t worry. I’ll help you with it,” Vivian reassured him.

“But let’s try to dumb it down a little, don’t want my teacher to think I cheated or expect more from me,” he said and returned to the living room.

Turning to Lois, Vivian gave her a smile. “I’m ready to go back.”

“But what about Bruce’s son? Are you ready to face him again?”

“I don’t hate Damian, and actually feel sorry for him. Unlike with Dick, Jason, and Tim, he never got a normal childhood.”

“I can’t say normal is a good way to describe those three’s childhood, considering the bird costume.”

“You know what I mean. But I’m ready to go back. He’s Bruce’s son, I can’t just turn my back at him, right? I know how it feels to grow up without a dad and mom. I only got a chance to have both for a short time and then that psycho came… And Damian, he just needs someone to help him out.”

Lois sighed loudly. “Why the hell are you so nice? It’s disgusting. Bruce is lucky to have someone so understanding, I would have left him then and there the moment he came with Damian.”

Vivian raised a brow and pointed at Connor’s way.

“Totally different situation.”

“I think Bruce having a kid with Talia is more sane than Clark coming home with his and Lex Luthor’s kid,”  Vivian jokes. “I mean, think about it.”

“Jesus, Viv, now I can’t get that out of my head. But I guess you’re right about that… if Connor wasn't a clone, I would have wondered who did the whole pregnancy thing.”

“Lois, Clark’s an alien.”

“No, no, no! Stop putting images in my head, it’s creepy!”

~*~

"Professor Pryor," Damian greeted her as she came through the door. "Welcome back. "

Vivian arrived at Gotham just around lunch time. She took the ferry home and Alfred picked her up from the port and drove them back to Wayne Manor. Upon entering the home, she was greeted by Damian who stood there like a soldier in full attention. 

"Damian, hello. I'm sorry if I left so suddenly,  I just -"

Damian held up his hand to stop her. "No need to explain. It's normal when you find out your husband had a child with another woman." Damian said. "But believe me when I tell you that I wasn't conceived in normal circumstances.  My mother drugged him in his last mission to apprehend my grandfather, and extracted a sample from him. She merged her DNA with his and conceived me in a lab where my growth was hastened."

"A test tube baby," she concluded. 

"Yes. In simpler terms, that is how I was conceived. Your husband was never unfaithful. My existence is the result of my Mother's and my Grandfather's many plots to build the perfect soldier. The perfect killer. And I have proven myself in many ways that I was."

"You've killed someone?"

"Yes, I have. After our last encounter, I now know that you are a witch. If you doubt my word, then I give you permission to enter my mind and see for yourself. I still have the memories of my time in the labs."

There was a shift in tone as he said it. Damian has experienced how it was to be invaded by Vivian’s magic and would not want to go through it again, yet here he was. Presenting himself to her, to go through that experience just to prove his father’s innocence in his conception.

"Why are you telling me this?"

"I have decided to stay here with my father and learn from him. And since I shall be here, we will be seeing each other constantly, and I hope it does not strain your relationship with him. Father seems to be more tolerable when you're around. And more focused."

Vivian smiled. "That is very much appreciated, Damian --"

"Also, I have read your works in the library. Father keeps a shelf for your thesis and published books. I must say, you surprised me. I underestimated you, Professor Pryor," he smirked.

"That's nice to hear, thank you."

"Also."

"There's more?"

"Yes, come with me."

Vivian glanced at Alfred's way and saw the man nod in encouragement. Following the boy, they came to the gardens where it was destroyed by him when he trained but now was built anew. When she saw the path he was leading him was taking him to them, she stopped and said, "No, please... I can't."

"Please, Professor, open your eyes.. You'll see," Damian told her.

"I can't," Vivian kept her eyes shut. 

"My love," she felt Bruce's arms holding her. "It will be alright."

"I can't..."

"Please, Damian worked so hard to do this for you. It will be alright. I promise,' Bruce pressed a kiss on her forehead. "I'll be here."

Nodding, Vivian let her husband lead her to the site but she dared not to open her eyes just yet. 

"Ma, come on," she heard Jason's voice.

"Jason?" Vivian finally opened her eyes and there she saw them. All of them: Dick, Jason, and Tim standing before her with a solemn look. “You're here!" She brought the tall young man to her embrace. She turned to Dick and Tim and beckoned him closer so she could hold them. 

"I'm sorry if I wasn't here when you needed me. But when I heard from Alfred, I tried to get back as fast as I could. Come on, open your eyes, you need to see this.The demon-spawn did a good job."

Vivian took a breath and finally pulled away to see. 

The once ruined garden was now filled with blooming flowers and where the broken, nameless, stone was now replaced with a new one carved with the name: Helena P. Wayne. Turning to Damian, she saw the boy holding a bouquet of potted tulips for her.

"An apology for ruining her grave. I never knew," Damian told her. "No... I knew, and I was angry that even when Father never met her, he cares more for her... you both do."

"You little --" Jason began. but Dick held him back.

Vivian knelt before Damian and accepted the flowers. "I'm sorry if I acted like I would never accept you, Damian. Truly. And for a while I thought I wouldn't, but I was just jealous that your mother gave my husband what I couldn't... I was scared and angry too. But after some time away, I realized that the daughter we lost will never be replaced. And maybe, fate has its way of giving me a chance to heal from this loss by bringing you here to us." She brushed her hand through his hair. "I opened my heart to Dick, Jason, and Tim... so who am I to not let you in?"

"You'd still want me even after I..."

"We all make mistakes. We sometimes let our emotions control us and make us do shitty and cruel things, but we learn from them. And we also learn to forgive. Welcome to your new home, Damian."

Damian smiled, a true smile that startled the others. "I will try to be better, but I will need your guidance as well. Father may teach me how to be a better fighter, but I can see that you can teach me more than he can."

Vivian held his hand and brought him close to an embrace. “This is called a hug, by the way."

Damian rolled his eyes. "Funny. I'm not young enough to not know sarcasm, Professor."

Vivian chuckled. "No, you're not. Come on, smart-ass, let’s get inside and have lunch because I am starving.”

Damian couldn’t believe how she just forgave him just like that and then treated him just like how she does with Tim and Dick. One of her own. When Tim teased him for freezing up, Damian glared at him and then offered to palace the flowers in the garden. Vivian appreciated the gesture but with a wave of a hand and a spell, the flowers flew to the soil before Helena’s stone.

“Mother was wrong about you, Professor,” Damian smirked as he saw her magic in her work. “You are interesting.”

Vivian smiled and messed with his hair. “By the way, now that you’re living here. You may be Bruce’s little soldier when you’re Batman and Robin, but here… you’re Damian, and my house my rules. And one of those rules is chores.”

Dick,  Jason, and Tim started snickering as they remembered the time they had to help out with chores in the manor.

“And, I know that you’re all smart, but once your father has finished whatever papers he needs to do to not make this a scandal, school.”

Damian frowned. “For your information, I know more than what America’s educational system can offer.”

“I know, but it’s not about that. It’s the principle of it. Okay?”

Damian glanced at his father’s way and saw Bruce smiling at them both. He then turned to Vivian and said, “Fine.”

“Good,” Vivian grinned. “I bought pizza from Metropolis, still hot and fresh from the oven. Don’t worry, it’s vegan too. Alfred told me you were vegan.”

While Damian was delighted with it, the older boys groaned in distaste. 

“I got three, don’t worry!”

As they were heading back inside for lunch, Bruce took Vivian’s hand and had them stay back for a bit. He held her hands close to his heart and just looked at her.

“How are you, my love?” He asked.

“Better. And you?”

“Getting better. Thank you, for giving Damian another chance.”

“He told me everything, how he was conceived. I still hate Talia and want to hit her with a freaking bat for what she did, but I can’t hate him. And Helena, she will always be a part of us, Bruce. And for the longest time, I can feel her again.”

Bruce smiled and leaned down to place a kiss on Vivian’s lips. When she was to pull away, Bruce followed her lips still, making Vivian laugh and kiss him back.

All was forgiven for them both.

After looking at the garden one last time, Vivian and Bruce went inside and joined their family in the dining hall where the boys were already battling for the pizza, while Damian ate his own vegan pizza. 

Their family was just getting bigger and bigger.

[rebouks]

Robin: Grandma! Sidney: Hi, honey. Robin: Hi. Sidney: Watcha doing?

[Robin wasn’t sure anymore, but he needed to ask something. He wasn’t used to talking to his grandmother though-.. even though he could, it always felt weird and forced. He decided he’d probably just have to be blunt]

Robin: Can I ask you something? Sidney: Shoot. Robin: Can we keep it a secret? I don’t want mom n’ dad to know I asked… Sidney: I can keep a secret.

[Sidney found a sheltered spot behind a rock and patted the sand beside her; Robin had barely taken a seat before launching his question at his grandmother, catching her off guard]

Robin: Has papa ever died-.. or come close?

[Sidney blinked, blindsided by Robin’s question]

Robin: I wanna know the truth too, like.. don’t do that thing grown-ups do n’ coat everything in syrup. Sidney: You really want the non-sugar-coated version..? Robin: Yeah.

[Sidney squinted at Robin, unsure how to proceed. He could tell she didn’t think it was her place to tell him]

Sidney: Why haven’t you asked your father? Robin: I don’t want to. Sidney: He’d tell you, if you asked-.. he’d be grateful for it too. Robin: Grateful? Why?

[Sidney sucked her teeth and buried her hands in the sand for a moment, thinking]

Sidney: Your dad and I never saw eye to eye when he was young, sometimes we still don’t-.. he didn’t trust me enough to talk to me, and I didn’t bother asking, or fixing it. It’s caused a lot of problems between us, so I think he’d appreciate you trusting him enough to ask. Robin: It’ll upset him though. Sidney: Well, tough-.. he can’t hide his past from you forever, he should know by now it always comes n’ bites you on the ass eventually.

[Robin frowned, feeling defensive on behalf of his father]

Robin: He wanted to tell me. Sidney: You’ve already asked?

[Robin shook his head, earning himself a confused look from Sidney; everything was so hard to explain when you had to tiptoe around the truth]

Robin: I want you to tell me. Sidney: I’ll tell you on one condition-.. you ask him about it too. He’ll have my guts for garters if he knew I’d told you and kept it from him. I can’t keep this particular secret, I’m afraid. Robin: Fine.

[Sidney shook her head and sighed; she couldn’t believe she’d been talked into this nonsense by a ten-year-old]

Sidney: Yes, he almost died-.. technically he did, but that’s just a medical thing, I suppose. Robin: Did you save him? Sidney: No.. I was there, but I couldn’t. Robin: Why not? Sidney: I just couldn’t do it; I was a mess! You can’t imagine how it felt, seeing him-…

[Sidney cut herself off, not wanting to go too far-.. but Robin didn’t need to imagine how it felt, he could feel it too. He quickly swallowed the lump in his throat, desperate to know more before his brain imploded with unanswered questions and half-truths]

Robin: What happened? How’d he end up like that? Sidney: Well… Robin: I know about the bad stuff he used to do-.. he drank a lot, was it that? It was in a bar or something, right? Sidney: He’s told you about that?

[Robin shrugged; his father had only alluded to such things, but Sidney didn’t need to know that, nor did she need to know what Larry had inadvertently shown him]

Sidney: Oscar had a lot of issues with drugs and alcohol when he was younger-.. it almost got the better of him that night, I think he just went too far by accident. Robin: So, it wasn’t on purpose? Sidney: Not exactly. Robin: What do you mean? Sidney: He knew the risks-.. but you really shouldn’t be asking about this sort of thing, honey. Robin: Just ‘cause I’m little doesn’t mean I can’t understand.

[Sidney chuckled; the apple certainly didn’t fall far from the tree. Robin was just as headstrong and persistent as his father]

Sidney: Maybe not, but you should be climbing trees and thinking about what’s for pudding-.. don’t worry yourself about all this stuff too much. Not yet, at least. Robin: It’s hard not to-.. did he get better after what happened? Sidney: For a while, then he got worse, then he got better again-.. go n’ talk to him, he’ll make you feel better about what happened. He’s had a good handle on himself for a while now; since before you were born, if I’m not mistaken. Robin: That’s a long time. Sidney: It sure is. Robin: It never really leaves though, does it? Not completely.

[Sidney hesitated briefly, surprised by the depth of Robin’s understanding]

Sidney: No, not really. Robin: Okay, thanks.

[Sidney yanked Robin back into the sand before he could run off]

Sidney: Don’t make me be the one to tell him about this-.. you talk to him, you hear me? Robin: I hear you… Sidney: You better! Don’t think I won’t make sure.

[Robin nodded, hastily escaping Sidney’s grasp, and her intensity. He had no choice now; if grandma Sid said she meant business, she damn well meant it]

Previous // Next

[seva-over]

RECOVERING

Batfam x reader (platonic)

Warnings: light descriptions of Scarecrow’s fear gas induced nightmares (but nothing drastic, mostly pure comfort), reader wears glasses. Divider made by me!

Being a teen wasn’t easy. Aside from the noisy classmates, angry teachers, and overall difficulties growing through that age, there was work. If asked, you'd always tell everyone that you worked in a coffee shop or a library, but the truth was… you were a Robin. The second Robin, to be exact. Which really wasn’t easier.

Sure, you weren’t as experienced as Dick was in ‘the Robin-ing’, as you called it, but you were quick to learn and, most importantly, enthusiastic. The small nods you got from Bruce and the wide smiles Dick gave you told you everything you needed to know: you were great at your job. Those were the moments that made you feel like you could defeat any villain.

Like that night. You, Bruce, and Dick were all on top of a rooftop, fighting Scarecrow. You managed to land a good punch and turned to Dick for appreciation with a spark in your eyes. Scarecrow recoiled from the hit, his eyes widened under the mask. Then, as you turned to Dick, the rogue smiled. You saw Dick flashing you a thumbs up, then his mouth opening to warn you as his face paled. You heard a soft hiss, your lungs filling with the fear gas, and that was when the nightmares began.

The world around you crumbled, images of Bruce and Dick and all your other friends and family, all distorted to the point of barely remaining recognizable. All shouting at you, taking off their masks and hoods to reveal their horrifying faces. It was too much. A gasp, two, three – you felt yourself passing out.

When you woke up in your bed, it was raining outside. Groaning, you put a hand on your aching head and stood up. You tried to remember what had happened to make you so dizzy, keeping your eyes closed to shield them from the light. That was when you felt a gentle hand on your shoulder, pushing you back on the bed. You finally opened your eyes to see…

"Selina?" you questioned, a light blush tainting your ears as you realized your mistake. You were so used to calling her by her first name when she wasn't around – Bruce always did – that you forgot about your own unfamiliarity with her. "I mean, ms.Kyle. What are you doing here?"

Selina’s eyes twinkled as you called her by her name. Knowing the reason for it, she smiled slyly to herself. She was wearing a rather casual outfit compared to her usual ones, consisting only of high heels, dress pants, and a sweater. Selina leaned back in her armchair – your armchair – and replied.

"Why, I came to check on you," she said, putting her arms on the armrests gracefully.

Her attitude didn’t impress you. You were sure by then: Bruce had definitely invited her to watch over you. But why her? Why not Alfred? Why not Dick? Why not a doctor, for god’s sake?! You rubbed your tired eyes, reaching for your glasses. That’s not a good explanation, you wanted to say.

"I see," you said instead, fixing the glasses on your face. "Where’s Bruce?"

Selina chuckled.

"He’s downstairs," she said, toying with a strand of her blonde hair. "He asked me to tell him when you wake up. But… I suppose you can tell him yourself."

You furrowed your brows, trying to guess what she meant, when you heard a soft call of your name from the doorway. Turning your head, you saw Bruce. His usually stoic expression had a mixture of relief and worry in it as he looked down at you.

"Hey, Bruce," you said, waving your hand lazily.

Bruce nodded, and you could see his face relaxing again. He approached the bed and sat down on the edge.

"How are you feeling?" he asked, his black eyes scanning your face for any injury that he may not have noticed before.

"I’m fine," you replied, attempting to sit up again. "What happened?"

Bruce sighed. A spark of melancholy flashed in his eyes before disappearing again. He was about to speak when the door opened again, revealing a very worried Dick. The first Robin's eyes lit up the moment he saw that you were awake, and he dropped his backpack onto the nearest chair, running up to you as he exclaimed your name.

"Are you alright?" the teen questioned, kneeling down next to your bed. "How’s your head? Do you see me clearly? How many fingers am I holding up?"

"Dick," Bruce interrupted him with a rare smile. "Let her speak."

Dick’s ears turned a light shade of pink. He averted his eyes.

“Right…” he muttered, glancing up at you again. He seemed to not mind Selina sitting in your room at all.

You leaned back against the headboard, gathering your thoughts.

"I don’t think I remember what happened," you said slowly, running a hand through your hair (neatly brushed, to your surprise). "We were fighting Scarecrow and then… oh, god." You covered your face with your hands, realizing just what had happened. "Oh god, I'm so sorry..." you muttered in a resigned tone. "I messed up..."

The image of Crane’s masked face flooded your mind once more. He was laughing at you, pitying you, studying you like a fascinating specimen, all the while you were crying and struggling to breathe. You could almost feel the fear gas on your face, instinctively reaching to scratch it. It was horrible. But the worst feeling was shame. You couldn't believe that you'd been so reckless. You were desperate enough for validation to let yourself be fear gassed.

"You did," Bruce mumbled solemnly, making you shudder. "You got distracted. You could have gotten yourself or the civilians hurt."

Each word was like a stab to the heart. God, you knew you messed up. Why did he have to say it like that?

"You’d been screaming for an hour before passing out," Dick said, looking up at you with a worried gaze. "But... Scarecrow was fascinated by your reaction. He was so focused on you that he didn't notice us approaching until it was too late."

An hour? Well, that was one way to make you feel better.

"I'm sorry," you managed to say eventually, looking up at the three people in your room with guilty eyes.

Bruce’s gaze softened a bit, and he placed a gentle hand on top of yours. Dick let out a quiet breath – you didn’t know if it was one of disappointment or relief, but it sounded like both. Selina, who had been keeping quiet for the last few minutes, spoke once more.

"I believe we should let the little Robin rest," she said, and you could read a hint of concern in her bright green eyes.

Bruce nodded, leaning back a bit. He let his shoulders relax a little, closing his eyes.

"I suppose we should," he said slowly, nodding.

Dick smiled, ruffling your hair. Selina crossed her arms.

"Careful, boy, I brushed that," she warned, though there was no real bite to her words.

The boy chuckled quietly, a gleam in his eyes. You felt yourself letting out a sigh. Your surroundings felt like home. Your family was with you, you could hear Alfred cooking something downstairs, you were in a nice, warm bed… Your eyelids felt heavy, your body relaxing…

"Wait, you brushed my hair?"

Just like I promised, here is a Batman fic! I hope you liked it, comments are greatly appreciated.

[weemssapphic]

Lipstick Stains - Pt. 11

previous chapter | next chapter | series page

Larissa Weems x fem!reader

summary: Larissa meets your roommates - and a phone call manages to sour your evening.

words: ~4.3k | ao3 link in title

A/N: sorry for the long wait (again) 💀 really struggled with this for some reason but to make up for it, chapter 12 is complete already and will be posted soon (and will feature our darlings going on their super slutty trip <3). until then, hope you enjoy and that it turned out okay! <3

.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.・。.・゜✭・.・✫・゜・。.

Larissa felt so safe and so warm in your arms that she’d ended up falling asleep; her head on your chest, her feet dangling off the end of the couch, your arms snug around her waist. The slamming of the front door woke her with a start, and she buried her head into your chest, thinking perhaps that if she willed the world around her to fade away, it would. No such luck - footsteps approached the living room and a vaguely familiar voice came closer and closer.

“Hey, are we still- oh. Shit. Sorry!”

Larissa tightened her grip on you as she felt you shift beneath her, feeling the vibrations of your voice in your chest against her cheek.

“Do you always have to be so loud?” you complained, sounding groggy - it seemed you’d fallen asleep as well, and Larissa’s lips curled up into a soft smile.

“It’s not even 6 pm, I didn’t think you’d be asleep!” 

“We were just taking a nap!”

“I can see that.” The smirk in Cassandra’s voice was evident from her tone. “Anyway, I was going to ask if we were all still planning on ordering pizza tonight. I’m starving.” 

“I guess. When are Robin and Christin coming home?”

Larissa wondered how much longer she could keep herself out of this conversation and pretend to be asleep - your hand came up to rest on her head, nails gently scratching at her scalp, and she shivered in delight.

“Christin just texted, they’re on their way.”

“Okay. Uh, yeah, we can order pizza.”

Larissa chose that moment to peek cautiously up at you. You noticed her move and smiled down at her - that smile alone made Larissa’s heart flutter.

“Sorry if we woke you,” you murmured.

“It’s alright, darling.” Larissa’s voice was slightly hoarse and she cleared her throat, a little embarrassed as she felt the lingering presence of your roommate in the doorway. “I should probably get going…”

Pushing herself into a seated position, she smoothed her dress and ran a hand subconsciously over her updo. She felt you shift beside her, resting your cheek on her shoulder and placing an arm around her waist, giving her a gentle squeeze. 

“Do you have to go?” you mumbled into her shoulder. Larissa’s heart clenched at the undertone of neediness in your voice, and she felt the familiar gnawing sense of guilt in her stomach at everything that had transpired in the past 24 hours. 

“You should stay,” Cassandra chimed in. Larissa’s gaze snapped over to the young woman and was met with wide brown eyes that watched her curiously. “I mean, Y/N seems to really like you. It would be cool to get to know you.” She shrugged, leaning against the door frame as her eyes flicked between Larissa and you.

Larissa looked down at you for your reaction. “It would be cool,” you agreed softly. “But I know you’re not feeling well so it’s okay if you just wanna go home.”

She supposed it would be important to get to know your roommates - and despite how tired she was, she was craving your company now more than ever. So she wrapped an arm around your waist and smiled at Cass. “Thank you for the invite. I would love to stay for the evening.” Larissa didn’t miss your beaming grin, or the way you squeezed her tighter. 

Cass left the two of you alone and padded off to her room. The moment she was gone you had Larissa pressed against the back of the sofa, straddling her lap and pressing your lips to hers in a searing kiss that took her breath away and drew a soft groan from her throat. She rested her hands on your waist, kissing you back eagerly.

“Thank you,” you whispered, punctuating your words with kisses. “Thank you, thank you, thank you.”

Larissa pulled back, fixing you with an amused look. “What are you thanking me for, love?”

“For saying you’ll stay.” You blushed and hid your face in the crook of her neck, your words muffled against her skin. “I don’t want you to feel like you have to. I know it’s not the best time and you’re tired and maybe you just want to go back to Nevermore but-”

“Darling.” Larissa took your chin gently between her fingers and guided you to look at her. She felt her heart soar at the care and worry for her own well-being that she saw reflected in your eyes. “I want to be here with you. Your friends are important to you and I think it’s time I met them properly.”

“Okay,” you murmured with a smile. “Still, thank you.”

~~~

Robin and Christin came home shortly thereafter and the five of you ordered pizza. It wasn’t long before you were squished together on the couches, chowing down and chatting.

Larissa could tell why you liked your roommates so much. Watching you interact with them made her feel a wistful sort of grief for her own past experiences - how nice it had been when she’d come to Nevermore and met her new roommate, the beautiful and witty and mysterious Morticia. Oh, how they’d hit it off in the beginning, thick as thieves, becoming the best of friends… becoming more. And then Morticia had changed. When she found Gomez, it was like Larissa had become nothing but a toy to her. Instead of coming back to her dorm after a day of classes, excited to gossip and giggle and snuggle like in those early years at Nevermore, she would enter her room with a feeling of dread, never knowing if she’d find her roommate cozied up to Gomez, or perhaps getting ready for some party that Larissa hadn’t been invited to.

In spite of her own heartache, she couldn’t help but smile as she watched the four of you joke around, happy that you’d managed to find people who seemed to truly care about you.

The way that Christin clung to Robin, resting her head on Robin’s shoulder as they sat on one end of the larger sofa, emboldened Larissa, who found herself subconsciously reaching for your hand and wiggling her fingers in between yours.

You turned to her with a look of surprise on your face and Larissa couldn’t help but grin. With a brief glance at your roommates who were locked in a heated debate about whether or not pineapple belongs on pizza, Larissa raised her thumb to the corner of your mouth and swiped at a drop of pizza sauce, the pad of her thumb lingering on your lip for just a moment, before she lifted her thumb to her mouth and sucked it between her lips. Larissa let out the faintest of hums to tease you, heat pooling in her core as she watched your pupils dilate, your gaze fixed on her lips.

“Jesus, you guys are worse than Robin and Christin,” Cassandra whined, pulling both you and Larissa back to the present. Larissa felt her cheeks grow warm, smiling sheepishly as you mouthed an apology before turning to your roommate.

“You’re just bitter because you’re single,” you said - the brunette shot a withering glare in your direction.

“How would you like it if I brought a guy home and-”

“It’s different if it’s a man,” Christin interrupted with a playful eyeroll, you and Robin quickly agreeing as Cassandra huffed and crossed her arms over her chest.

“You’re the one who agreed to live with a bunch of lesbians,” Robin said with a grin.

“Well Y/N used to be on my side,” Cassandra grumbled. “Before she met Larissa.” Her gaze landed on the blonde, her lips quirking up into a devilish grin - Larissa could feel her face grow warmer still.

“Leave Larissa out of this,” you protested.

“I’m right here, you know,” she murmured, unable to hide the wide smile that was beginning to stretch across her face.

“Don’t worry, we like you. But Y/N has turned into such a simp since she met you.” 

Your other roommates agreed and Larissa looked down at you, amused to see that your cheeks were glowing just as red as hers felt. 

“Moving on,” you said, clearing your throat. “Whose turn is it to choose what movie we watch?”

~~~

After pizza, Larissa agreed to stay for a movie - you were glad your roommates hadn’t sent her running for the hills (yet), and thrilled at the prospect of snuggling up to her on the couch, craving the physical closeness. It was Christin’s turn to choose a movie and she went for a classic: Mamma Mia.

Larissa’s plush thighs bracketed your own, your back pressed comfortably against her front and your head resting back against her shoulder. One of Larissa’s hands was splayed across your abdomen, pulling you snugly into her, the other hand resting on your hip as her thumb lazily stroked your curves. You could feel yourself slowly melting into your partner, as if your bodies belonged together, fitting like puzzle pieces. Larissa was warm and soft and oh so comforting, your brain going slightly fuzzy as you relished in the sensation of her breath on your cheek and her legs brushing against yours, enveloped completely in the scent and feeling of her.

A soft buzzing could be heard and Larissa’s hand left your hip, shifting you aside slightly to reach down into her purse next to the couch. With a glance at her phone screen, a sigh escaped her lips and she pressed a quick kiss to your temple before wiggling out from underneath you, whispering, “I’ll just be a minute.”

You settled back onto the couch as Larissa padded into the kitchen, nestling into the warm spot where she had been sitting moments prior. You found you could hardly concentrate on the movie, though, as you strained your ears, curiosity getting the better of you - it was awfully late to be getting a work call. It was no use, however - Larissa spoke in such hushed tones that you couldn’t make out a single word.

When Larissa re-entered the living room, you shifted aside so that she could resume her position behind you. As she pulled you between her thighs, you craned your head back to look up at her, noting a subtle shift in her demeanor - what exactly she was feeling, however, you couldn’t tell, as her features quickly settled back on neutral.

“Who was that? Is everything okay?” you whispered, trying not to draw the attention of your roommates.

“Everything is fine, darling,” Larissa whispered back, with a smile that didn’t quite reach her eyes. You quirked an eyebrow and Larissa quickly looked away, her gaze landing on the television - you felt your stomach drop at being dismissed so quickly. She pressed her lips absentmindedly to the crown of your head, draping an arm loosely over your midsection.

Realizing you weren’t getting any more information out of her, you turned back to the movie, but your attention waned and you found yourself unable to fully relax into Larissa’s arms as you had before. Larissa was hiding something from you, and it did not feel good. It felt as though your intestines were twisting themselves slowly, excruciatingly, into intricate little knots. It felt as though a lump was rising in your throat, making itself a home and making it hard to breathe as your brain immediately jumped from one worst case scenario to the next about what Larissa could possibly be hiding.

As you felt the distant sting of tears threatening to make an appearance, you extricated yourself from her grip.

“I’m getting water, does anyone want anything?” you asked, trying to keep your voice level, purposely avoiding Larissa’s gaze.

Robin shook her head no, Christin let out a quiet “nope”, Cassandra said “no”, all turning their attention back to the movie. Larissa stayed silent, and you could feel her eyes on you as you left the room, burning a hole into your back.

Standing in the kitchen, you leaned against the counter, your back to the living room as you took deep, steadying breaths. Surely you were overreacting. Surely. It was probably just a call from someone at Nevermore about a student, routine business, Larissa was probably just tired. You were probably doing what you did best and reading too much into things. Right? 

Except it felt like something bigger. Larissa seemed so stressed and on edge - no matter how often she would tell you she was fine, she clearly wasn’t, and there was nothing you could do to help her. And that feeling sucked.

Soft footsteps sounded behind you and your heart fluttered hopefully as you turned around - only to be met with the sight of Cassandra, leaning in the doorway and watching you with her dark brows knit together.

“You didn’t come in here to get something to drink.” It was a statement, not a question - you’d known each other for so long that she could see right through you. You shook your head no, worrying your bottom lip between your teeth to hide the way it wobbled.

Cass sighed and stepped closer. “You wanna tell me why you’re hiding in the kitchen instead of cozying up with your woman?”

You shrugged and she rolled her eyes in response. “Is it because of the phone call? Do you think she’s…” She bit her lip and gestured vaguely.

“No… I don’t know. I don’t think so? But she’s being weird.”

“So talk to her.”

“I don’t think she wants to talk.”

“So make her! If something is bothering her, you should know.”

“Yeah, I know…” You nodded, swallowing against the lump in your throat. The thought of adding to Larissa’s stress made you nervous - you never wanted to do that - but there was something else. What if she was hiding something from you? Would you want to know? Would you be able to handle it if she was?

“You guys get lost in there?” Robin called out from the living room.

“We’re coming,” you yelled back. Cassandra gave you a pointed look, which only served to deepen the pit in your stomach. You ignored it and poured yourself a glass of water, brushing past her to re-enter the living room, your roommate following close behind you.

You settled back into Larissa’s arms - she looked worried, her brows knit together, but there was also a hint of guilt swimming in those sapphire pools. It made you feel worse, knowing that Larissa could sense something was off, and you hoped she would address it soon.

When the movie finished, Larissa’s arms tightened around you and her lips found your cheek. You tensed at the contact - Larissa noticed and immediately pulled back, and you felt a strange sense of guilt at avoiding her concerned gaze as you sat up and stretched.

“Ah shit.” Robin stood from the couch as she checked her phone. “It’s almost midnight, I have to be up in 5 hours. It was nice to meet you, Larissa.” 

Larissa smiled warmly. “Likewise.”

One by one, your roommates excused themselves - Cassandra making a point to bump your shoulder on her way out.

“They’re all very kind, I’m glad you have them,” Larissa said once the two of you were alone, tilting her head to the side and smiling softly.

“Yeah, me too…”

Larissa’s eyes searched your face, her smile slowly fading as she took in your rigid posture. “Darling, are you alright?” She took a step closer to you, taking one of your hands in her own - you were certain she could feel how clammy your hand was, and your fingers twitched nervously.

“I’m fine,” you lied, not quite able to meet Larissa’s gaze. 

“Y/N, look at me.” Strong fingers gripped your chin and urged it up, your head tilting backwards. You had no choice but to look the shapeshifter in the eyes, your breath catching in your throat at the stern look on her face.

“Good girl,” she murmured, her voice low, and your cheeks turned pink. Her gaze seemed to drink in your expression - nervous, sad, needy - and her face softened, her hand dropping back down to her side. “Have I done something?”

It took you a moment to find your voice - when you did, it was hoarse. “I don’t know. Have you?”

Larissa furrowed her brow, her eyes narrowing - you could tell she was thinking. Hard. Then her face fell, seeming to take your stomach along with it.

A long, heavy silence engulfed the both of you, Larissa’s nostrils flaring as her eyes darted about the room - your own eyes were glued to her face, carefully taking in every microexpression that passed across it before it finally settled on hurt. Your stomach rolled uncomfortably as a wave of dread began to crest within you, growing larger with every passing beat of silence.

Finally, Larissa spoke, her voice strangely calm and level. “Is this about the phone call I received?”

“I… I don’t know. Is it? I feel like-” You could hear your voice start to shake and you swallowed thickly. “I feel like you’re not talking to me… What about Morticia? I don’t even know who she is and yet you’re, I don’t know, drinking yourself to death because of her?”

Larissa sighed, reaching up to cup your face. “Oh, love, it’s alright, it doesn’t matter. It’s silly. Please, don’t worry ab-”

“Don’t tell me not to worry about it, Larissa,” you hissed, feeling angry tears threaten to spill over your cheeks. “I am worried about it. I’m worried about you.” Your throat was getting tighter by the second as you stumbled over your words. “I want to help you but I don’t know what’s going on, I feel like you’re trying to shut me out.”

Larissa’s eyes fluttered shut, a pained expression crossing her face as she swallowed visibly, her throat bobbing. “I don’t mean to shut you out,” she whispered, letting out a shuddering breath. “Morticia was my roommate at Nevermore. She once meant very much to me, but that was a long time ago. Now she is nothing more than a thorn in my side and, unfortunately, the mother of one of my students.”

She looked as though she wanted to say more, her mouth opening and then closing again, no sound coming out. Then she shook her head lightly, her voice bordering on pleading. “I’m sorry. Please trust me.”

You weren’t satisfied, not in the slightest - your mind was racing with question after question. But Larissa looked as tired as you felt, and any fight you had in you was quickly draining from your body. “I do trust you,” you whispered. “You can trust me, too, though…”

Larissa’s eyes, blue and glassy and wide as saucers, snapped up to meet your gaze. “I do.”

She placed her palm, warm and comforting, on your cheek, her long fingers curling behind your ear, and you found yourself nuzzling into her touch. Her eyes darted hesitantly between yours and she leaned down to kiss you, slowly enough for you to stop her. You didn’t, allowing plush red lips to melt against your own - hesitant and loving and needy all at the same time. One of Larissa’s hands curled in your hair while the other gripped your waist and tugged you closer as her tongue swiped at your lips.

A door somewhere in your apartment creaked open and, becoming aware that your roommates were still very much awake, you pulled back. “It’s getting late. You need sleep. Proper sleep.”

Larissa peered down at you, unblinking. Finally, she nodded slowly and bent to fetch her purse. “You’re right.”

“I’m not done talking about this,” you whispered, half-hoping Larissa wouldn’t hear you as you fidgeted with the hem of your shirt.

“I know. Please be patient with me?” Larissa’s voice was soft and bordering on timid, and you nodded, offering her the most reassuring smile you could muster as you walked her to the door.

You watched her form retreat until she’d disappeared entirely into the night before closing the door and leaning back against it, your body tense and your heart aching.

~~~

In the following days, you could tell that Larissa was trying to make it up to you. She sent you more texts than usual, mundane updates of her day - she even sent you a voice note during her lunch break, the very first one she’d ever sent you, telling you proudly how she’d managed to get groceries and restock her fridge. In the evenings she called you, waiting until you’d fallen asleep before hanging up. You talked about many things, but not Morticia - never Morticia. It still left you feeling a little… off - you hoped she would be ready to talk soon.

On Thursday, you returned home from your morning classes to an empty apartment and busied yourself with making lunch when the doorbell rang.

Figuring one of the girls had forgotten their key again, you opened the door, only to be met with the sight of a delivery driver holding a large box.

“Delivery for Y/N?”

“Uh.” Your brows scrunched together in confusion - you hadn’t ordered anything. “Yeah, that’s me…”

The man thrust the package into your hands and turned to leave, wishing you a nice day. You closed the door and looked down at the package, your heart skipping a beat when you read Larissa’s name on the shipping label.

Settling on the couch, you opened the box - there was a bunch of gold tissue paper and, among it, a small card. A smile crept up your cheeks as you picked up the card, recognizing Larissa’s neat, tight cursive.

My darling, In anticipation of our trip, I have a little gift I’d like to give you. It would please me greatly if you would wait to unwrap it until we’re together, so I’d like for you to bring it with you. I hope this isn’t terribly presumptuous of me, but I couldn’t help myself. Hopefully you are looking forward to this weekend just as much as I am. All my love, Larissa

You bit your lip, your heart feeling like it could burst at any second. Carefully sifting through the tissue paper, you uncovered another, slightly smaller box and something softer and more compact - clothing? - both wrapped in gold paper. You pulled out your phone, snapping a picture of the mountain of tissue paper and sending it to Larissa.

Y/N: You really didn’t have to get me anything!

It only took Larissa a minute to respond, as if she had been waiting to hear from you.

Larissa: I know that, darling. I wanted to.

Y/N: Are you suuure I can’t open it yet? You’re really killing me with the suspense here…

Larissa: I am certain that you can be a good girl and wait for me.

You were grateful to be home alone, your cheeks growing warm and electricity spreading through your limbs. It was crazy just how much you were at Larissa’s mercy, how she was able to turn you on with so little effort on her part - you decided that Larissa deserved a little teasing.

Y/N: And if I don’t want to be a good girl? Then what?

Larissa: Then you would deserve to be punished. 

Y/N: Well maybe I want to be punished by you.

It took Larissa noticeably longer to reply to that text than to the others, and you grinned down at your phone, imagining the principal getting all riled up in her office - perhaps texting you during a meeting, trying to hide how flustered you’d managed to make her. In all fairness, you’d gotten yourself worked up as well, your cunt throbbing with a need that you’d have to take care of soon.

Larissa: Noted.

You laughed - it had taken her a whole 4 minutes to reply with that one word.

Y/N: That’s all?

Larissa: Darling, you’ll be the death of me… I’ll call you tonight, alright?

Y/N: Yeah, of course. Don’t forget to eat lunch :*

Larissa: Thank you x

~~~

Larissa did call you that evening. You were snuggled up in bed, your phone lying on the pillow next to you as Larissa’s soft, lilting voice floated from the speaker. The clacking of her laptop keyboard could be heard in the background.

“Have you packed already?” Larissa purred. 

“Yep.”

“And you packed what I sent you?”

“Yeah - unopened and everything.”

“Good girl,” Larissa murmured seductively, her voice dropping an octave.

“God, Larissa,” you groaned as heat spread through your body. “You know how unfair it is when you do that.”

“I haven’t a clue what you’re talking about,” Larissa said coyly - you could picture her batting her lashes and smirking, and it did nothing to help with the throb between your legs. “I’ll pick you up around 10 tomorrow, our flight leaves at 12:45.”

Your eyes grew wide. “10? In the morning? Are you sure?”

“Of course, why wouldn’t I be?” You could hear the frown in Larissa’s voice, the clacking of the keyboard coming to a halt.

“I just mean… don’t you have to work?” You worried your bottom lip between your teeth as your pulse picked up.

“I think Nevermore can survive without me for one day, love. Even principals are entitled to a vacation,” Larissa teased.

“Oh.” You were glad Larissa couldn’t see you blush. “Yeah, okay, I’ll be ready at 10.”

“You sound surprised.”

“I’m not, I just thought…” You were unable to finish your sentence - honestly, you were a bit surprised, having thought she’d want to pick you up in the evening after work.

“You mean so much more to me than you realize,” Larissa said softly. Her words overwhelmed you - you wanted so desperately for them to be true, your heart close to bursting. If Larissa had been there with you, you’d have kissed her senseless on the spot. 

You swallowed, your voice hoarse with emotion. “I can’t wait, Larissa.”

“Neither can I, darling. Now get some sleep, I want you well-rested for the weekend.”

“Yes, ma’am,” you replied with a giggle, reveling in the barely audible snort that Larissa let out. “I love you, Rissa.”

“I love you, too, pretty girl.”

x

Taglist: @mysaviorfalsegod @imlike-so-gaydude @rainbow-hedgehog @enchantressb @alder-saan @eveymay @amateurwritescm @brienneswife @principal-weems09 @messynessi @larissaoftarthweems @anti-bright-places @lvinhs @catechristiesstuff @ladyzmilf002 @milfsloverblog @opheliauniverse @orangeisnttheonlyfruit @im-a-carnivorous-plant @alexusonfire @bigolgay @kimiinou @wastdstime @scream-queenlover @imprincipalweemspet @justcallmelittleone @willowshadenox @milfsloverblog @yourlocaldisneyvillain @leftoverenvy @yahaqueen @peggycarter3 @lilfartbox1 @makemyworldworthliving @crow-raven-crow @mosscoveredcrucifix

Let me know in the comments if you'd like to removed from or added to the taglist <3

[piratefishmama]

Beware The Thorns | Part 9

Robin Buckley made it her job to know things about people in Steve Harrington’s life. That was something she’d always done. Ever since they’d been bound to chairs back to back in a basement, ever since Steve had goaded, pushed, and insulted their captors, spitting vitriol, forcing them to focus entirely on him leaving her with barely a scratch, a sore jaw from where one of them had slapped her across the face but that was it.

Steve had been hospitalised for over a week with his injuries.

And in that time, the senior Harringtons had laid waste to the entirety of the group that’d held them captive, and had forged an odd little friendship with Buckley&Buckley, a P.I husband and wife duo who were endlessly grateful for Steve’s sacrifice to ensure their daughters survival.

A friendship that continued for years after the senior Harringtons passed their empire onto their son in their passing.

She wasn’t even supposed to be there, she’d taken it upon herself to investigate something to prove that she could. To prove that she was ready to join her parents in their work. Wrong place, wrong time. But it gained her Steve, he was worth the nightmares.

Which was why she spent her Monday morning going to a coffee shop she didn’t actually enjoy on the east side of the city, drinking overpriced black ‘artisanal’ sludge, which usually she’d be an advocate for, fuck Starcucks an all that jazz, but this place?

Dumpster fire masquerading as a ‘hip new coffee joint’, ran by a douchebag in a beanie with a moustache that didn’t fit his somewhat misshapen potato sack face shape.

All to meet with one very pretty young lady, who seemed to actually enjoy the coffee the shop served.

“I need to know where he’s going to be.” A very pretty lady, who held her coffee cup to pursed, painted red lips, bright blue eyes on Robin’s face. “And I need to know if he’s already locked down a new client, I’m assuming these are things you’ll know… as his friend.”

“Mmnnn, I mean. You’re not wrong.” She took a sip then placed her cup back down on the cork coaster provided. “I do know where he’s going to be, and I do unfortunately know his hook up schedule, but what makes you think I’m going to tell you any of it? As his friend, it’s kind of my job to keep that information on lockdown, isn’t it?”

Robin liked Chrissy. She’d always liked Chrissy, same as Robin always liked Eddie, they had similar vibes. Wearing a mask of thorns to protect the pretty petals from those who’d do them harm. She didn’t know how they knew each other, didn’t know enough about Eddie to make assumptions as to where they’d met, but Chrissy was the closest thing Eddie had to a best friend, as far as Robin knew.

Chrissy was the only friend that Robin could get to without it immediately getting back to Eddie. Eddie’s little game friends, Gareth, Jeff, and Dougie? They’d tell him the second she reached out, would sound an alarm and she’d never get anywhere near him, claiming they were ‘being good friends’, but Chrissy was smarter by far. Chrissy was just enough of a best friend, to know when Eddie happened to need something that he didn’t want to admit to needing.

Just enough of a best friend to be able to tell him he was being an idiot, and not just immediately side with him.

Like Eddie’s very own Robin.

“It is, but I’m hoping that I’m right in the fact that he’s probably been miserable since he ended things with Steve, right?” It all kind of hinged on that. On Eddie’s real feelings behind his little mask. “Steve’s pretty miserable… it’s depressing”

“So miserable he’s sent you out to track Eddie down? Or are you doing this sniffer dog bit on your own initiative?” Robin opened her mouth to reply, but Chrissy continued as if she hadn’t asked a question, asking another instead, “what makes you think he’d be miserable?”

“Which question am I answering here?”

“Mmmmm second one please.” Chrissy took another sip, so nonchalant. She had an energy about her that Robin felt strangely familiar. A countenance Robin had only ever seen in one other person.

“I know he was acting, I know there are sides to Eddie that Steve never saw, that Eddie never let Steve see—”

“Like all the sides of Steve that Eddie never saw?” Robin tensed, brow furrowing “oh unclench, Robbie, the Cunninghams and the Harringtons go back generations, pretty sure Steve and I would have wound up in some stupid arranged marriage had the Harringtons not been against it.” Robin didn’t like not knowing things, why did she not know that? How had she missed Chrissy of all the potentials to have told Eddie about Steve’s life? How did she not know that Steve ought to know Chrissy? “I never said anything to Eddie and I don’t intend to, but… why should I let Eddie be dragged into such a messy life? There’s so many fish in the sea, Robin, why should I let my best friend be dragged down by a shark?” At least now Robin knew why Chrissy’s personality, her eerie calm felt so familiar.

She was Steve in prettier packaging.

“I’m at a disadvantage here, aren’t I?”

“Oh very much so, but you’re very cute so I’m letting you off.” Robin blinked once in surprise, then did her best to quell the pleasant buzz that thrummed through her veins at the not-so-subtle compliment “Please answer my question, why should I give you what you want?”

“He… Steve… He loves him, Chrissy… Steve has done bad stuff, don’t get me wrong, he’s done awful things to people, but I’ve never seen him like he is whenever Eddie’s around. It’s like he’s drowning in the dark and Eddie’s just… a light at the end of the tunnel, an if Eddie loves him too, which I think he does… why should they be apart?”

“And now the real reason, not the Hallmark movie one?” Chrissy raised a brow in boredom.

“I… I don’t know, Chrissy. I don’t know. I don’t. I’m running on best friend fuel. Steve needs him, or at least needs closure from him, and as his best friend I’m duty bound to try and get that for him. I’m sure you don’t love Eddie’s job. Right? He wouldn’t have to do any of it if he just—”

“Gave up his freedom and all the work he’s put in to establish himself in his field for a slim chance at happiness with one of the most dangerous men in the city?” Chrissy leaned back in her chair, one leg crossing over the other as she crossed her arms over her chest, coffee cup left to rest on the coaster.

“Better the devil you know though, right? Wouldn’t you rather him be with someone you know won’t hurt him… than with someone you don’t?” Chrissy’s eyes finally left Robin’s face, dipping down to the right as she thought about it.

Eddie wouldn’t be alone for long, he’d find a new client, he’d be on someone else’s arm, and he’d continue his life unchanged with a risk of being hurt.

Or… or he could have what he wanted.

Chrissy knew what Eddie wanted. They’d spent more than enough evenings on his couch with ice cream mooning over Steve Harrington and while she’d have loved to tell him that he was trash, he was a monster in sheep’s clothing… he just wasn’t. So she’d kept quiet.

She let Eddie pine away for a life he could have if he took a chance, never telling him why he shouldn’t.

“What if this new client wouldn’t hurt him?”

“Let’s be real Chrissy he’s probably already planned on reaching out to Tommy to fill in the gap in his schedule, you and I both know what kind of trash heap Tommy Hagan is.” An easy cash grab that’d probably make Eddie feel like shit. “Do you want to risk Eddie’s happiness on a what if, or do you want to tell me where he’s going to be so Steve can be there and sweep him off his feet?”

In retrospect, Robin should have probably been suspicious when Chrissy sat up straight, when she looked at Robin as if she was assessing her, and she definitely should have been suspicious when, with a short “Alright then,” Chrissy plucked a pen from her bag and a little notepad, and jotted down an address and a time. But with a small victory in her hands, and a front row seat to Chrissy’s perfectly perky… ponytail retreating for the door with their business concluded.

She really wasn’t thinking all that hard.

[xoxo-sarah]

I Wanna Be Yours || Part 15

Part 14 | part 16

↝a/n: I was supposed to post this earlier this morning but got distracted by Spencer Reid fanfics. I'm sure y'all understand 😞

↝pairing: Robin Buckley x fem!Wheeler!reader

↝ Warning: not proofread, possible spoilers, cannon events, angst, fear, Vecna, upside down and it's gross self, switch of pov at the beginning- it's Robin's pov for the last chapter, shorter than my other chapters, second to last chapter!!

↝⎙ 9.7.24

-Robin and Steve's POV-

“Maybe she's just scared,” Steve started, keeping his voice down as to not alert Nance or you. He saw how you pulling away had affected her. The hurt was evident on her face, even more so as you walked away. He had never seen Robin hurt like that, like she was a kicked puppy. As soon as the door to the RV shut, Robin busied herself, grabbing bottles and tins of kerosene. “Given the situation, I'd say it's normal to feel that w-”

“Steve,”

“What?”

“I don't care.” She sighed.

Steve watched her. “And I don't understand why you do either with everything that is going on. She has other things to worry about.” Although she couldn't tell him about you being cursed, she had a hunch that he already knew. Who wouldn't? “Honestly, this feels like the perfect time for that pull of the rug because, in the face of the world ending, the stakes of my love life feel spectacularly low.”

Steve looked over at his best friend, sympathy lacing his furrowed eyebrows, “Exactly, today could be our last day, spend it with her. You deserve to be happy.”

Robin shook her head, opting not to reply.

It was a kiss- well, many kisses. She wouldn't lie and say that she didn't like it, but she would understand if you could. The timing was God-awful, she'd admit.

Maybe Robin should pull away, at least until this is all over.

Things don't always go as planned.

“Help!” Nancy yelled from inside the van.

Steve and Robin were instantly on their feet, scrambling to the door.

Once inside, Robin felt the world stop spinning.

-----regular POV-----

“Escapade” by Janet Jackson played through the headphones covering your ears. Robin sat beside you in the back of the RV, hand encasing yours. Dustin and Eddie were on the other side of her. Although you were squished against the window, you hadn't felt more content, which was crazy given the circumstances. Steve was currently driving you all to your possible deaths.

Robin's hand let go of your hand, moving to squeeze at your thigh. Looking away from the passing trees, you turned to her concerned eyes. She stared into your own for a moment, before leaning forward. Her lips met your cheek, unsaid words being left behind when she pulled away.

The van came to a stop. Max, Lucas, and Erica got out, walking toward the Creel house.

The RV was now parked in the woods beside the trailer park. Nancy paced the van, before stopping. “Okay, I wanna run through it one more time. Phase one-”

“We meet Erika at the playground. She'll signal Max and Lucas when we're ready.” You answered first, fiddling with the headphones around your neck.

Nancy nodded, “Phase two?”

“Max baits Vecna.” Steve added. “He'll go after her, which will put him in his trance.”

“Phase three?”

Dustin answered, “Me and Eddie draw the bats away.” Eddie cupped Dustin's head, shaking it with a grin on his face.

“Four?” “We head into Vecna's hopefully newly bat-free lair and-” Robin held up the glass bottle with a cloth sticking out of the top. The flammable liquid sloshed around. “Flambé”

“Nobody moves on to the next phase until we've all copied. Nobody deviates from the plan, no matter what. Got it?”

You all nodded, “Got it.”

You grabbed a few of the homemade spears, following Nancy out of the RV. You quickly made your way to Eddie's trailer, Steve flipped the light switch on, staring at the old sheet hanging from the ceiling.

“Be careful.” Dustin told Steve, watching as he took his bag off.

“Thanks, buddy.” Steve patted Dustin's arm, before grabbing the sheet. “Here goes nothing” He climbed through, flipping to land of his feet.

As soon as he stood, he looked up. Robin muttered sarcastically, “woah…what does he want us to do, applaud?” You smiled, amused, before watching Steve drag the old mattress over, plopping it on the ground.

“Alright, let's go.” Nancy shrugged her bag off. Robin dropped to one knee, offering an extra boost.

After Nancy fell on the mattress, Robin motioned for you. She helped you step on her connected hands, pushing you up. Supplies dropped next, followed by Eddie.

Robin flopped on the mattress. You were quick to help her up. Your hands stayed intertwined even after she was off the gross mattress. More supplies, then Dustin.

Walking into the familiar darkness, the flying particles didn't bother you as much as before.

“Hey, guys, listen.” Steve stopped walking, turning back to Eddie and Dustin. “If things here start to go south, I mean, at all, you abort. Okay? Draw the attention of the bats. Keep 'em busy for a minute or two. We'll take care of Vecna. Don't try to be cute or be a hero or something. Okay? You guys are just-”

“Decoys.” Dustin and Steve's voice overlapped. “Don't worry. You can be the hero, Steve.” Dustin sighed.

“Absolutely, I mean,” Eddie looked between himself and Dustin, “Look at us. We are not heroes.” He grinned at Steve.

Steve turned around, beginning to walk toward you guys.

“Hey, Wheeler.” You turned, seeing Eddie looking at you. You jogged over, not wanting to keep your group from the mission for long. He took you by surprise as he brought you into a hug. “Make him pay.” His words were mumbled into your hair. “For Chrissy.” He squeezed your arms, before pulling away. Smiling, he let you go.

Determination ran through your veins.

“When Vecna fails with Max, he's going to go after you. Keep this on.” Nancy stood in front of you, grabbing the headphones from your neck and placing them on you. She left one ear uncovered, so you could still hear what was happening around you. “Stay close.”

She turned back around, following Robin and Steve through the dead woods.

“Uh,” Robin's voice shook, as she shined her light on a tree. “I don't mean to freak anyone out, but I swear we've seen this tree before.”

“That's impossible.” Nancy walked closer.

“That would suck, right?” Robin threw her head back, exasperated. “If…if Vecna destroyed the world because…'cause we got lost in the woods?”

“We're not lost, Robin.”

She chuckled in response, unsure. She walked ahead, seemingly losing her mind in the process.

Nancy watched her run ahead, “Robin, hey. Watch out for the vines-Hive mind! Remember?”

“Thank you!” Robin jogged ahead.

“Ah, don't worry about her.” Steve threw his hands up. You quickened your pace, shining your light to watch your step.

“Robin, hey, slow down.” You fell in step with Robin, turning to watch her side profile. “Take a breath, okay?”

She inhaled through her nose, exhaling through her mouth. “The weight of the world is on our shoulders right now. I mean, the rest of the world doesn't even know what's about to happen. They're clueless. What…what if this doesn't work? What is Vecna outsmarts us?”

“Robin,”

“We don't actually know if this is going to work.”

“Robin.”

“We could all die, and then Vecna can do god only knows what else to Hawkins.”

“Robin!”

You pulled her shirt, causing her to stumble backwards, away from the vine she nearly stepped on. She blinked at the vine, before looking at you. “Thanks.”

You nodded, grabbing her hand. “Everything will be okay. We're doing all we can.”

Bats flew around the old house that once belonged to the Creel family. Vecna was the only one occupying it now. In front of it was the playground you were to meet Erica at. You all gazed at it from your stop on the hill, thinking over the plan, ignoring the anxiety in your stomach.

“Okay, the lovebirds have copied.” Erica spoke from the other side, the particles growing brighter on your side. “Max is moving into phase two: Distracting Vecna.”

“So far, so smooth.”

“Yeah,” Steve agreed with Robin, “We're not even at the hard part yet.”

Thunder mixed with the sounds of creatures lurking.

“Take the bail, you son of a bitch.” Nancy glared at the house, “Take the bait.”

“Okay, she's in. Initiate phase three.” Erica spoke again,

“She's in. Move on to phase three.” You echoed into the walkie.

“Copy that. Initiating phase three.” Dustin concluded. Eddie began playing “Master of Puppets” by Metallica, the music vibrating the very ground you stood on. The bats snarled loudly, flying toward the sound.

“Okay, it's working. Let's go.” You quickly made your way to the house, Vine/tentacles squelched wetly, making you frown in disgust.

“Oh shit,” They were everywhere, covering the floor, walls, even the ceiling. “That's not good.” Steve grumbled. He jumped over the slithering vines. Robin cursed when he waddled before regaining his footing.

Robin grabbed your hand, squeezing it, as she gnawed at her bottom lip.

“It's okay.” Nancy spoke.

"You got this,” You squeezed Robin's hand in reassurance, offering her a smile. She reluctantly let go, stepping forward to follow what Steve did.

You went next, followed by Nancy. You held your breath as you hopped up the stairs. Steve helped you on the final step. As soon as everyone stepped forward, finally being able to breathe, the ground shook, sending you all three steps back.

You quickly huddled together, holding each other tight.

Robin sighed before her head snapped down, watching a vine wrap around her leg. She looked up, panic in her eyes. Before she could say anything, she got yanked back, against the wall. You shrieked, moving toward her.

“Y/n! Steve!” You swung the hatchet down on the vine with force, Nancy and Steve doing the same.

Bringing the hatchet back, something wet wrapped your wrist, pulling you back. Yelping, you collided with the wall on the other side of Robin. Your weapon clattered to the ground. Steve was grabbed next, then Nancy. More tentacles wrapped around your limbs, slithering tightly around your neck.

You grunted, fighting for oxygen. Looking up, you watched as Robin's lips moved but nothing came out.

Your eyes moved up, meeting her eyes, before your vision became blurry.

•© 2021-2024 by xoxo-sarah on Tumblr•

• My work is not to be translated, copied, modified, and/or reposted on any other site without my permission. [!I don't give permission!]

🫧 Taglistׂׂ ૢ ~ @overtrred28 @ihatepeanutss @jovana1234578 @dobbycarl @kyleeservopoulos @marirxse @ch-3-rry

[lonesome-witching]

You Shouldn't Be

Robin gets bullied in this one. I'm sick and tired and I have an early day tomorrow so please forgive me.

Do you have any prompts yourself? Or do you want to dive into what I wrote before? You can read my previous prompts or send me some new ones.

It wasn’t anything new. That didn’t mean it stopped hurting. Some things never stopped hurting. Some things like her mom telling her that her rambling was a flaw. Or her classmates shouting insults she told herself every night. She wasn’t sure how they had figured it out or if they didn’t even now at all. Maybe they just thought this was the worst insult in the world. To Robin it might have been.

So, she did all she could. She kept her head down, avoided confrontation, bit her tongue when she had to, and she had to. She did everything to become as invisible as she could. She did everything, and yet it wasn’t enough. Because those vile words were still thrown her way. She couldn’t walk through the hallway without being confronted with it.

Tommy Hagan was the worst one. He never gave her a second to breath. Jason Carver wasn’t much better. Robin sometimes wondered what they got out of it. Maybe it was overcompensation.

“There’s dyke Buckley!” Jason shouted as Robin exited the building.

Her eyes scanned the parking lot. She knew Steve was somewhere around. He always was. He always parked in front of the school, he always picked her up. She couldn’t see him now.

“What’s going on, Buckley? Are you upset?” One of Jason’s friends was laughing. It made him sound like a broken record.

“Don’t you know you are supposed to look at the people who are talking to you?” Jason stepped closer. Robin stepped away.

“I think they should kick you out of school. I feel bad for all those poor girls that have to get changed in the same room as you. Do you stare at them when they take their bra off, Buckley? Are you a freaking pervert? You are disgusting.”

“I’m not disgusting,” Robin whispered to herself. She wasn’t sure she believed herself.

“You don’t think you’re disgusting, Buckley? You think it’s normal to get off to the image of your friends?”

“I don’t­—”

“Oh, fuck off, Jason.”

Robin turned around to see Nancy Wheeler approaching, her bag hanging off her left shoulder. She was wearing a pink skirt, and a light blue blouse and Robin vaguely registered it should look ridiculous, but it didn’t. Nancy looked great. Even despite the scowl on her face. Possibly due to the scowl on her face.

“This isn’t about you, Wheeler.”

“Well, frankly, I think it is. Because me and Robin have gym together. Didn’t you worry about the safety of the girls who shared a locker room with her?”

“What?”

“I have to say I can’t complain. I would much rather share a locker room with Robin than with you and your goons any day.”

“Really?”

“Yeah, at least Robin has some decency. Can’t be said from you. How many times have you asked me to fuck you again? And that whilst you have a girlfriend. What does Chrissy think of that?”

“You keep your mouth shut to Chrissy.”

“You leave Robin alone and I’ll consider it.”

Steve rushed forward. Robin wasn’t sure where he had come from. “Jason, back the fuck off.”

Jason’s eyes were still boring a hole in Nancy’s face. Robin could only assume he was debating whether or not she was bluffing. Robin doubted she was. She had never caught Nancy in a bluff before, and she knew Nancy wasn’t a good liar.

“Back off,” Steve shouted, pulling Jason away from them.

“Don’t touch me,” Jason shouted back.

“You better stay the fuck away from my friends, Carver.”

“You’re pathetic, king Steve.” But Jason turned away.

“Are you alright, Robin?” Nancy asked first, placing her left hand on Robin’s arm. It felt far too intimate for a public parking lot.

“Yeah, yeah. I’m fine. I’m used to it.”

“You shouldn’t be,” Steve chimed in.

“Steve’s right,” Nancy agreed. Her hand fell back down.

“It’s alright, guys. I’ll survive.”

Robin walked away in what she hoped was the direction of Steve’s car.

[symphonic-scream]

Yes, 100%

:D

Everyone has a pet that has the name of their persona (cause I'm sentimental) like. Morgana is just Akira's emotional support cat but he also has a little red bird names Arsene. Goro has two mice named Robin Hood and Loki, and Futaba has a ferret named Necronomicon

In the quad apartment there's Carmen the cat, Goemon the turtle, and Captain Kidd the snake

As for Makoto and Haru, there's M'Lady the large rabbit and Johanna the doberman. Hifumi doesn't have a pet yet, but maybe one day

The Okumura-Niijima apartment is right above the bakery and cafe, but they made sure to add an entrance at the back so they don't have to work through the shop front to get home (Makoto sometimes has an overwhelming day at her placements. Sometimes Haru's relapsing into her caged mindset. They wanted a safe route in and out without crowds)

M'Lady sometimes spends Haru's time working the cafe with her. They made a little throne for her at the far side of the counter. Regular customers like to bring her little veggies to snack on

Makoto is training Johanna to work as an EMA. She wants to give her future patients as much comfort as possible, like being able to offer sessions with her and her dog. It's a work in progress, she got the idea when she met Joker (and Morgana) for the first time

I have stories for everyone meeting Joker too so. Let me know if you want those

Hifumi is at first dumbfounded when she discovers Makoto is trans. Akira had told her one of the wives were and based on how they present themselves, she assumed it was Haru. She and Makoto have many long talks about how they define femininity and such. For Makoto, it's in her spirit of rebellion. Being a woman to her is refusing to conform, not to accept the hand she's dealt but to stand up and push for what she wants

And for Haru, it's more like a comfort. She's always felt, protected by her own inner view of the world. She sees her own femininity as like, frills and fluff and treating herself. Inner love. They balance each other well

Makoto: I notice you hunch a lot. Is your height something that makes you feel a little dysphoric?

Hifumi: ah, I suppose so. I'm taller than both you and Haru, and Akira too...

Makoto: I have a solution for that. Want to feel short? You should visit our other friends' place. They're all tall there

Haru: she's right! Ann and Yusuke are both, very tall!

There's lots of conversations about gender and sexuality between Hifumi and all the thieves, about how they found themselves and tips they have for being queer. Some are, awkwardly personal

Hifumi: did you. Have your surgeries yet?

Makoto: ...it's 9 am I'm- I'm not talking about this that early I'm sorry

Haru: just a tip, you don't have to have any to be trans! You can have one, or the other, both or none! Gender and sex are personal to you, don't let anyone else dictate your experience

Makoto is red in the face and sipping at iced water trying to ignore the Convo (it's the one topic she's nervous about. Only because she doesn't like hospitals.)

Hifumi: why do you guys have two spare rooms anyways? For family?

Makoto: oh, no

Haru: can you keep a secret? Don't tell Akira or the others, but... We're thinking of having a baby

Hifumi: ...am I your test run for parenthood?

Makoto: no, don't be silly. That was when we took care of Futaba when they were fighting with the boys

Haru's father isn't a fan of her relationship with Makoto, but he accepted he has no say in whether they're together or not and stays out of their hair. He's, working on being supportive. It's taking him time to learn

Sae on the other hand has been Makoto's number one advocate for years. She helped her sister find herself back when Makoto was just in middle school, and even set her up at a vastly different highschool to start fresh

Goro is horribly awkward around anyone but Akira or Futaba. He's. Like a stick. It freaks Hifumi out at first

Just. Hifumi experiences all sorts of love too. Seeing her friends who found their forever people, platonic love, the sort of familial love she forms with Makoto and Haru-

I have many many thoughts please keep talking to me about this I'm,

Also. Help me find a name for this au so I can make a tag for it! Send me suggestions

[boggie-things]

Robin Buckley has a list of fears.

It's long, most lists she makes are.

It's topped by rabies, sparked by a documentary her father had accidentally left on when she was six. (Foaming mouths of coyotes and raccoons sure did leave a mark)

Earthquakes are a definite number two. A reasonable fear, she supposes. She saw it on the news once, something about one in California, half a nation away. She was unsteady as is, she didn't need the ground to shake under her too.

Three is a tie between snakes and spiders, for wildly different reasons but still valid enough in her mind to keep them that high after all these years.

And somewhere between public speaking and sharks is Nancy Wheeler.

But Nancy wasn't there because of crawling up your throat fear like rabies was. No, she was there because of messy feelings made up of warm cheeks and twisted tongues.

It was a repeated offense, appearing in every encounter they had shared with each other since their first meeting in third grade at lunch.

Sweaty palms in fifth grade at a field trip to the museum in Indianapolis.

An itching feeling in her gut over the summer between seventh and eighth grade at the local pool.

Nervous rambling in the summer of 85' at Starcourt.

Always around her, no matter how brief of a interaction. Brief eye contact across the school hall could leave Robin spiraling.

Nancy Wheeler had that effect on her. A racing heart and overwhelming urge to please and connect with.

And that's exactly why she's number twelve on her fear list, sometimes thirteen whenever she has to present an assignment for the class.

Robin's heart felt like it would burst every time they were in the same room, but another feeling kept her stable, lifting her head above water to get air.

It ran alongside her so-called fear. She thinks it's admiration. But deep down she knows it's love.

She couldn't afford to love, love was on her fear list too. Below snakes but above Nancy herself. Number ten, maybe.

Rejection shared the space with a slash between them, one in the same.

A common fear, but also so unique. A guy could fear rejection out of embarrassment. Robin did for pariah status and cruel words being flung. Fear for her life. Number seven on her list, being outed.

Nancy is number twelve when Chrissy Cunningham dies. She replaces large crowds at number eight while in the Hawkins Library, shining a light on her shot in the dark, showing a bullseye.

She makes it past needles at number four while running from Pennhurst, a mad smile of glee on her face as she hits the gas, smiling at Robin as she smiles back.

Her heart keeps its normal beat. Robin thinks she is losing her fear.

Number twelve sits blank while standing in the Creel house, burned away by the sparks of a cracking gun as Nancy steps up and relentlessly pulls the trigger.

She's not afraid. She's in love.

Robin has a likes list.

It's short, but every spot is there for a reason.

She likes lemonade and snow. Dogs more than cats. Learning languages and playing her trumpet.

But at the very top is Nancy Wheeler.

Nancy Wheeler’s name is marked with love beside it in quotation marks, deserving of its own list tattooed on her heart.

But she's there on Robin's like list as she looks at her with dopey eyes and flashes bashful smiles.

Sometimes Nancy returns them.

But maybe she's reading it wrong, just because she's off her fear list doesn't mean she's clean of worry.

Number ten stays the same, after all.

But Nancy keeps her stable, listening with the attention of a whole room whenever Robin rambles, number eleven isn't as daunting anymore.

She retakes her spot at number twelve briefly, just for a night as Robin fights for the courage to admit her feelings.

But she's erased fiercely from it when she kisses her back.

Robin's heart bursts not with fear but joy. Nancy makes her feel lots of things. Happy, loved and nervous. But not fear.

It's always love. It always was.

[2309analysis]

| # NICO ROBIN HEADCANONS ⟢

Want my Nico Robin Spotify playlist? Here you are, my little stars! https://open.spotify.com/playlist/4qNuBLMnk6sQezE34SFSjt?si=jffYQ3IKSji9zOOQ9FnRZg&pi=u-Y9_SsOHjSnmb @kazenomegaminowanpisu

Robin keeps a chart of all the books she’s read and haven’t in her Library. Like a stash of notes.

She also keeps charts for all of the crew member’s reading. So she doesn’t give them a book that they’ve already read. She’s in charge of the library so they ask her for books.

She likes to read to keep her mind off of the past. She also gets sorta bored easily which is why the crew has board games. She mainly plays with Chopper and Usopp though.

She kinda looks after Nami’s fashion taste and creates something out of it to call her own. She never had the time to care about what she wore, so when she met Nami, she knew that she could ask what clothes would look good on her.

She teaches the crew how to pronounce certain stuff. Mainly Nami and Luffy.

I feel like she likes to wear a cowboys’ jar because it symbolizes free terrain. She can go wherever she wants, regardless of her high bounty.

She didn’t really know how to control her devil fruit power when she first ate it. So she always accidentally caused trouble for others’ which made them resent her more. So she stopped trying to use it, and stayed away from most people to prevent to cause more trouble. It wasn’t until she was fully alone that she mastered the basics of her power.

She didn’t feel fully comfortable about having a bounty after Enies Lobby. She decided to should throw away all the fears she had and embrace what comes next with confidence.

She taught herself how to read since she was three. When her mother left, she was interested in the finer book shelf her mother had. She picked up a few books and tried reading it until she could get sentences through and understand them. Then she went to the archeologists in inspiration from her mother and intrigue from her own.

She naturally knows how to sail a boat due to her surviving alone 20 years. Mostly through reading it through books and oars.

Her favorite colors are purple and blue. Purple because it’s more of the more laid-back colors, and it doesn’t bring much attention to itself. Blue, because it reminds her of her mothers eyes, like her own.

She doesn’t like to eat much food. She’s so used to tending for hereof and being on guard 24/7 she doesn’t know how to react with a bunch of affection towards her. Which is why she mostly dismisses it.

She loved children. She wants to protect them as if they’re her own. She can’t take children suffering.

She’s touch-starved. She hasn’t felt any physical affection ever since her mother died. Although, she hates to be too be affectionately. She doesn’t like to feel vulnerable like that, or any way. She hates the feeling of weakness and her not to be able to do anything.

She’s claustrophobic. She feels trapped in tight spaces, as if she couldn’t do anything for self. Like she’s unable to free herself; trapped. She starts to panic when she’s in tight spaces.

She feels most comfortable around Chopper and Nami. Like she can tell them anything. She doesn’t like to seem weak in front of them, like she’s supposed to protect them. ‘Cause she’s older, more experienced, she wants to keep them from what she had to suffer through. She see’s Nami like a little sister and Chopper like a son.

She has slight romantic feelings for Franky. Since they’re most similar to each other. They’re the oldest other than Brook too. She also likes that he’s independent and knows his ground.

She doesn’t like to be separated from the straw hats. She doesn’t want to lose them, she feels too attached to them. In good ways, of course. So she wants to protect them whilst they’re giving her the accompany and support that she’s been needing ever since she was eight. She feels like she needs to either lay down her life to repay them or keep thing safe no matter what. Especially the weaker ones, and, of course, Luffy.

She has a soft spot of naiveness. Since she knows so much, it’s hard for her to not smile amongst the people who’re not as knowledgeable as her. It gives her a sense of mothership.

She prefers power naps over actual sleep. She hates to be unaware of things for too long. She wants to keep herself and her friends from danger, so she’s always awake or fake-sleeping. (Now I know some of it came from her past and her constantly being backstabbed by others’ so she kinda lost the ability to sleep peacefully. Before Enies Lobby ofc. She still feels that way though.)

Before Enies Lobby, she didn’t like to wear anything too revealing. She didn’t like showing too much skin like Nami did. She wasn’t self-confident like that, but she wouldn’t oppose it if she had to. Like in Skypiea. In situations like that, she would choose things that would be easier to wear in the climates. With help of Nami she would pack a new shirt or pair of pants just in case.

She loves showering. It makes her feel the warmth she needs. It also makes her feel clean from the bad stuff that happened to her. She tries not to take long showers either, but when she came back from Enies Lobby she unintentionally took a very long one. Nobody said anything about it, though. She apologized after, no one accepted it, and said she deserved it. (Now I wanna write that out! 😂)

She likes hugs. She may not say anything about it, but when both Nami and Chopper hugged her in Enies Lobby, she was token back, but overwhelmed with happiness.

She’s not a daydreamer, but she loves to imagine. Especially related to books. New scenarios to add in the story or add-ons from the scenes itself.

She’s a good writer too. She vocabulary is the best within the straw hats. She doesn’t usually write much though. Not really a thing that crosses her mind much.

If the straw hats would write letter, it’d either be Nami, Franky, Brook, or her to write them out.

She sometimes write to her mother. In her diary, of course. About all the adventures she had, the friends she made, and it’ll start and end with “dear mother, love, your daughter, Nico Robin.”

She takes pictures of the islands their on. She studies the island’s history through it.

She likes acting because she doesn’t feel pressured to act anymore. You can tell how naturally it comes to her because she had to survive for the past 20 years acting and facading for others. It only makes sense that she’s going to be great and fast to get into character. It’s second nature to her.

| # Robin appearance headcanons ⟢

She has freckles around her shoulders. Practically takes up her entire shoulder, almost making a new skin-tone.

She has body scars around her legs and upper stomach. Which is mostly why she didn’t show much of those parts in pre-timeskip. She felt slightly insecure about them, until Kaola complimented them.

She has some white hair strands. Due to the constant stress of being on the run and constantly backstabbed.

She has soft frost imprints on the backs of her ears when Aokiji freeze her over.

She’s boney. That’s it.

Her skin has a soft shade of sunburn on her face and chest. She liked to be outdoors a lot, so it was natural for her to get east sun find. (Hc her skin’s sensitive to the sun)

Eye-bags, but you can hardly tell.

Curvy cheeks and a boney nose.

Has a back scar from the time she was attacked in Dressrosa.

Sunglasses sunburns on her eyes and forehead.

A slightly bigger forehead than what we see.

Her right eye is slightly curved down from the normal position of the eye. Unnoticeable until you really pay attention.

She has marks all over the back of her feet. She constantly walked in snow and rocks barefoot, so they scarred her feet a little.

A rose blush on her knees.

Veiny hands and feet.

Big thighs.

A permanent slither of blue in her toe nails due, again to the weather. No frost-bite, but close.

A belly piercing.

Small dimple on the right side of her lower lip.

Hairy legs, but shaved every two weeks.

Sweats a lot. Soft anxieties here and there.

| # Robin beach headcanons ⟢

She and Franky go searching for seashells and small things in the sea.

Nami and Robin does each other’s sunscreen and lotions.

She builds sandcastles with Luffy and Chopper.

Her and Usopp play volleyball together with Sanji and Brook.

Her and Jimbe relax together.

She brings a book and some water guns for Luffy and Chopper.

She and Brook maybe sandmaids for Zoro and Nami.

Her and Zoro sit near the water durning the sunset and talk about their feelings.

She and Luffy play tag and role play with each other. (Mostly her sprouting her hands and eyes)

Her and Nami does each other’s accessories. (Like flowers in each other’s hair, glasses, swim suit jewelry, yes their those girls)

Her and Usopp make the water guns stronger than usual.

She uses her devil fruit’shands as shade for the boys. We all know they aren’t going to get under the umbrellas with the girls if Sanji has something to say about it.

She gives lotion and sunscreen to everyone.

She provides the snacks and drinks + Sanji’s already prepared lunch.

Wine/beer drinking with the adults. >>>>

Brook makes a playlist for her to read her book to.

Bags / big hats. >>>

Plays tik tak toe in the sand with Chopper and Franky.

Her and Nami go on beach walks.

[ravensmind]

RobRae Week 2023

~RavensMind~

Day 2 - Reunited

One Night Long Ago

Raven frowned and rolled her eyes as Beast Boy did his old imitation of their late enemy, Mad Mod for the current Teen Titans. Some things were better left dead and forgotten because it either depressed you or made you remember the awful gym outfit you were forced to put on while being subjected to British history. She didn't need both to be affecting her simultaneously. It was great to see her old friends again, of course, but it also meant revisiting some old memories, and a certain friend was prominent in more than a few. *He* had never been hers, but it still stung to see him jump from one failed relationship to the next while she watched from a distant sideline.

She watched Robin, now Nightwing, cross the room to say something to Argent and felt her heart sag in her chest. Truthfully, she had only herself to blame. It's not like she had bared her feelings to him and had been rejected, no, that at least would have been easier to handle. She had a chance to open up to him, one night when he took her to a horror movie and ice cream afterward to try and cheer her up when she was dealing with a lot. They had spent the whole day together, talking, laughing, and at one point she held his hand and she would have said something, had it not been for that damn Mad Mod returning to the city, causing their alarms to go off, which brought the night to a close. She never worked up the courage to say anything to him and convinced herself it was better this way.

Raven sighed and went over to the punch bowl. She admired the new pictures on the walls of the tower, hung by the current team. She hadn't been to the tower in five years, and this celebration of a new chapter for Jump City with a new band of heroes might mark the last time she would set foot here. She spooned out some punch for herself and flicked back her long, violet hair as she turned to reach for a plate to get some snacks from the small buffet. 

"Hey Rae, long time no see," a voice behind her said.

She stopped and took a moment before she turned to greet him.

"Rob-I mean, Nightwing, yes, it's good to see you," Raven said.

"You okay? You seem nervous, and I don't think I need our bond to tell," Nightwing said.

"Just reminiscing, I guess," she said, "Beast Boy needs to cut out the Mad Mod impression before I cut out his vocal chords."

"Tell me about it. It's okay, though, not like he's constantly in our faces anymore, I think we can let it slide," he said.

"I suppose," she admitted grudgingly.

"You staying busy since you left?"

"Mostly. Healing our little extended family's battle wounds doesn't leave too much time to rest. I think I see one of the Justice League for healing at least once every couple days. What about you? Bludhaven treating you…better?"

He smirked, then frowned, "It's a lot nastier there. I'm on top of it though. Not easy flying solo all the time. I'd rather not talk about it, if that's okay. How're you doing otherwise? Seeing anyone?"

"No problem at all. No… not much for dates right now. You?"

"No, I haven't really had the opportunity. Figured I should take a break anyway after Barb broke up with me."

"Probably the smarter choice."

Nightwing smirked and laughed a little. Neither of them had moved since they started talking. She always felt like he could have her under a microscope in a second if he wanted, knowing more about her next move than she did, and that feeling was hitting her hard during their conversation.

"You're so blunt, sometimes. I missed that. I've missed you," he said with a smile.

"I… missed you too," she returned, trying to keep her thoughts in check.

"Hey, I was thinking, want to head up to the roof, talk a bit like we used to? That always helped me when I was feeling stressed from our line of work," he asked.

"I-yes, sure," she replied.

"I'll get some punch too before we head up," he said.

Raven couldn't get over how different he looked even though he seemed like the same person she fought alongside for years. His black hair was long, down to his back, and he'd changed his mask along with his color scheme, fulfilling Starfire's experience of him in the future. He had gotten taller, too. He stood a good half a foot taller than her now, where before they were nose to nose. She hadn't changed much, letting her hair grow long and exchanging the blue cloak for white,  she grew another couple inches taller, too. She watched him pour his own punch and forgot herself for a moment looking at his rear profile. One girl had complimented his butt one time while they were out and from that point on, he had committed to doing even more squats. It seemed silly to her at first, but she appreciated it now. 

Nightwing and Raven took their cups of punch and left the common room, walking through the all-too familiar corridors to the stairs, and finally reached the roof. Together, they walked to the edge, looking out over the bay and sat. She took a sip from her cup, then breathed in the spring air, letting the sunlight warm her face, and tried to think of what to say. They rarely needed words, but she was tired of living with the massive "what-if" in her mind. 

"Do you remember that night when I was feeling like garbage and you took me to see The Summoning and we went for ice cream after?" Raven asked.

"Uh, yeah, I think so, why?" Nightwing asked.

"It was sweet of you to go out of your way to try and make me feel better. I always think of that night when I think of you," she replied, "was it special to you?"

"Yeah, it was pretty special. I don't think we hung out like that often, didn't help that I had a crush on you," he said.

Her mind ground to a halt and she coughed as she nearly spat out her punch. He what?

"You…did?" she asked.

"Still do, if I'm being honest."

"Are you messing with me? Did Zatanna put you up to this?"

"Huh? No, why would I mess with you like that?"

She sighed and looked down into her cup, trying not to mentally kick herself for not talking to him about how she felt at the time. It took her a moment before it clicked: they were both currently single. Now if she could just force herself to say something, anything, to let him know she was interested in more than one date.

"I…had feelings for you too… I-I do," she heard herself say.

He flinched next to her and almost spilled his drink. Their bond was stronger than ever when they were near each other and through it, she felt the intensity of his thoughts without prying deeper and she paled at the depth of his emotion, not knowing how she missed before. It freed her own emotions and she spoke quickly, convinced she could tell him everything.

"I wanted to tell you, but there never seemed to be a good time, and I was always close to the edge of losing it when my father was still a threat to me. I didn't trust myself. Didn't really think I could handle a relationship. Now, it's… different and I-I hated watching you spiral out in your relationships from far away. I didn't know if I could reach out, or if I should," she confessed.

"I understand. I was afraid you'd reject me and that I'd make a mistake and hurt you, messing with your emotions. I really should have just trusted you instead of making that call myself. I'm…sorry, I didn't think you liked me that way," he said.

"I think I was blushing every other time you so much as touched me, surprised your detective eye didn't pick up on it," she said.

"Think I might've misread it as something else. You are the hardest to read unless I use that bond of ours and I know the day we went to the movie happened before we had that bond," he explained.

"I'm not blaming you for not catching it, I know I hide things too well. I should have said something," she said.

"Well, no use worrying about what we can't change…uh, you ever been to Bludhaven?" he asked, a smile slowly forming on his face.

"No, but I'm sure I can make time to visit, if you'll show me the sights," she replied, giving him a half-smile.

"There's at least one I have in mind, but it's not exactly a tourist experience," he said with a smirk.

"All the better. Though I am curious as to what you're planning. Do I get another hint?" she asked.

"Hmm, well it's very exclusive, and… it was meant for you alone, even if it's uh, had other eyes on it," he replied.

"I think I could guess, but I'll let you surprise me," she said with a smirk.

"Awesome, I'll uh, call you when I leave Jump, promise," he said with a smile.

"You better. I'd hate to have to hunt you down. And… you're not leaving the tower tonight without giving me more than just that promise," she told him, her voice soft and inviting, looking from his masked eyes to his lips.

"Someone might have to hit me, I'm kinda wondering if this is real," he said with a laugh.

"Oh, it's quite real."

Raven scooted closer to Nightwing on the tower roof's edge and set her cup down.

"If I wake up when it's over, I'll be the one hunting you down," he warned.

He set his drink down on the side away from her and scooted closer to her, his thigh touching hers.

"I wouldn't fault you for it. Maybe," she said.

She leaned in close, putting her palm on his chest over the blue symbol on the black suit that covered his body.

"You don't know how long I've been wanting to do this," he said.

He put his arms around her and leaned in, his face inches from hers.

"No, I think I have an idea now that I know... Next time, don't back off when we both reach for the popcorn," she said with a knowing smile.

Nightwing laughed and then pressed his lips to Raven's, holding her tight in his arms, and kissing her deeply. She was burning in his arms, containing her power while still allowing herself to enjoy and experience as much of the moment as she could. Her emotions were wild in her mind, threatening to overwhelm her senses even as she poured herself into them, feeling his strong embrace and the pressure of his lips locked on hers as the wind kicked up around them and the sun's heat lit them up on the rooftop. She clutched the fabric of his suit and pressed herself closer against him, not wanting him to stop. Eventually, they both broke away, unsure of how much time had passed.

"I wish we still had rooms here, would make it easier to go further… If you wanted to," Nightwing said.

"You forget… I can take us anywhere," Raven said, softly.

"Oh, uh, yeah, right, of course! So… my place or yours?" he asked.

"Hmm… Mine," she replied.

[foundtherightwords]

All Our Yesterdays - Chapter 11

Pairing: Ralph (Timewasters) x OFC

Summary: Thu, a museum archivist, only wants to escape her dull life in 21st-century Hanoi. The last thing she expects is to end up in 1929 Indochina via a time-traveling elevator and cross paths with Ralph, an Englishman on the run from the French Foreign Legion. Romance blossoms between them, but in a colonized country, unrest is always looming on the horizon, and Thu must decide if she wants to stay with Ralph in the past or return to the safety of the future.

Warnings: outdated/period-typical attitudes about women, mentions of war, mentions of pregnancy and abortion (involving a supporting character), some angst, some smut (non-explicit)

Chapter warnings: unwanted pregnancy, abortion, mentions of blood

Chapter word count: 3.4k

Chapter 1 - Chapter 2 - Chapter 3 - Chapter 4 - Chapter 5 - Chapter 6 - Chapter 7 - Chapter 8 - Chapter 9 - Chapter 10

Chapter 11

Things between them had changed again, but now, instead of adrenaline keeping her on the edge, Thu felt like she was getting a daily boost of serotonin. She moved into the studio with Ralph to save themselves from having to sneak behind her landlady's back, and now, the simplest things, like hanging her jacket up next to Ralph's on the coat rack when she got home from work, or jostling for a place at the bathroom sink while they brushed their teeth, or grabbing one of his shirts to put on when she got out of bed in the morning, or a little casual kiss or hug or touch, could make her grin like a dork or spread a fluttery feeling from her chest all through her body.

Sometimes, when she woke up in the middle of the night, Thu wondered whether her feelings for Ralph would've been as intense, or indeed, whether she would've fallen for him at all, if they had met in less extraordinary circumstances. How could she be sure that her feelings were genuine? What if they simply came about because she had been so lost and scared and he had been there at the right time? But as she felt his arm around her waist and his breath on her hair, she told herself, No, this is real. Just because their first meeting was slightly unusual didn't make it any less real. Yes, perhaps it was fate or some mysterious cosmic force or even Homeless Pete that had thrown them together, but nothing had forced them to stay together except for their own feelings and passion for each other.

She no longer made a detour to Robin Park to check if Homeless Pete was still there. She no longer planned to go back after the Lunar New Year. Instead, she started planning for the Lunar New Year itself, eager to show Ralph all the traditions and food. That year, the Lunar New Year came early, at the end of January, and already there was an air of bustling anticipation and excitement on the streets. The pavement were crowded with vendors selling everything from flowers and plants and paintings for decoration, to green leaves and bamboo strings to wrap the square chưng cakes, without which the Lunar New Year feast was never complete, to new brass and tin wares and anything else one might need to start the year afresh.

On the Day of the Kitchen Gods, a week before the New Year, Thu followed the tradition of buying a couple of golden carps and setting them free in Sword Lake, while Ralph helped with great interest.

"But how are the carps supposed to carry the Kitchen Gods to Heaven?" he asked. "Heaven is up there, while they're swimming down here—?"

Thu smiled at his confusion. She'd asked her mom the same thing when she was little. "The myth is that the carp will swim upstream and turn into a dragon, see? It's all symbolic."

"And the Kitchen Gods are going to report our affairs to—to whom?"

"The Jade Emperor."

"Won't they be confused to learn that you're here?"

Thu stood up from the lake shore, wiping her hands on the handkerchief—her own now. "Oh man, I didn't even think about that! Would they even understand time travel? I can't imagine what my parents' Kitchen Gods must be thinking..." The thought brought back too vividly the memories of the Lunar New Year of her childhood, and her conscience smarted. She had been so happy the last three weeks that her family had not entered her mind at all. If she had gone missing in her time, there would be no Lunar New Year for them. Perhaps she could pay Homeless Pete a visit and ask him how the time machine worked exactly, whether he could take her back for a visit... And then what? Just keep going back and forth in time, like some lame version of Doctor Who? What kind of life would that be? That was if Homeless Pete could even understand her.

Noticing her smile vanish, Ralph gave her hand a squeeze. "I'm sorry, I didn't mean to—"

What would he say if he knew she'd found Homeless Pete? Would he urge her to go home? She looked at him, his eyes so tender, his hand so strong, and resolutely stamped down her previous thought. She'd decided to stay here with him, so there was so point in second-guessing it. She squeezed his hand back. "It's OK," she said, giving him a reassuring smile.

***

"Does this look all right?" Ralph said, placing the branch of peach blossoms in a vase on the sideboard, next to a small potted kumquat plant.

"That's perfect," Thu said. Between the peach blossoms and the kumquat, she placed a couple of chưng cakes, a dish of five fruits, their colors carefully selected to correspond to the five basic elements of metal, wood, water, fire, and earth, and other traditional foods. Then, with a certain sense of defiant glee, she pulled out a roll of scarlet firecrackers, each cracker the size of her little finger, and hung it over the balcony. Firecrackers had been banned in Vietnam a couple of years before she was born, but when she visited her grandparents in Hue as a kid, she and her cousins had often snuck a few firecrackers here and there to set off on New Year with the other children in the village. She was determined to experience this tradition properly at least once.

She stepped back to look over the display with satisfaction. It might not be as elaborate as her mom's display, and the food was all store-bought instead of homemade, but for her first Lunar New Year in the past, it would do.

Ralph wrapped his arms around her waist and pulled her into a hug from behind as he, too, looked at the display. "So at midnight, we'll set off the firecrackers?" he asked.

"Yup, to ward off the evil spirits of the old year and bring in good luck for the new year."

"Any other traditions? Like a New Year's kiss or something?" he asked, leaning down to nuzzle into her neck.

"Haven't you been kissed enough in the past four weeks?" She twisted her head and gave him a peck anyway.

"Never!"

"Well, people sometimes take hot baths with water infused with coriander seeds, to cleanse themselves."

"Hmm, a hot bath sounds nice."

She laughed, turned around to face him, and kissed him again, more fully. Just as he was pulling her closer and the kiss became hungrier—

A knock sounded on the door.

Both groaned as they disentangled themselves from each other. The knocking started up again, urgent, persistent. Thu glanced at the clock. It was almost ten. Who on Earth could it be, at this time of night, and on New Year's Eve too?

She opened the door. Standing there, clutching a bag to her chest, her usually rosy face ashen, her hair disheveled and frosted with rain, was Mai.

"Mai, what are you doing here?" Thu asked.

"I'm sorry, but I don't know where else to go."

"How did you even know I'm here?" Great, the office's gossip mill must be rolling if they knew she and Ralph were living together. Not that she cared, but in this time and place, it was positively scandalous.

"I don't, I just—guessed," Mai said, glancing uncomfortably at Ralph.

"What's happened?"

"Can I please come in?"

With a worried look back at Ralph, Thu stepped aside to let the girl in. Mai dropped down on the couch and buried her face in her hands.

"What's the matter?" Thu asked again, sitting down next to her.

"It's—it's Louis!" Mai sobbed. "He's gone! He was transferred back to France and he said he couldn't take me with him!"

"Oh, honey." Thu put an arm around Mai's quivering shoulders. "That's not the end of the world."

"It is, it is," Mai said, weeping. "I'm pregnant!"

Thu remembered Mai's paleness, her cramps, her fatigue in recent weeks. Dismayed, she looked at Ralph, who was watching them converse in Vietnamese with mounting confusion and alarm. But she had no time to translate for him, because Mai had looked up and said, in a broken voice, "At least, I was."

The way she said it turned Thu's blood cold. "What did you do?"

"I went to this herbalist," Mai said. "He gave me this tea... I'm sorry to interrupt your New Year's Eve like this, but I had to wait until Madame Phuong and her family went back to her husband's village for the New Year... I offered to stay to mind the house... I told my parents I'll be back on the third..."

But Thu wasn't listening to her rambling explanation. "Did you drink the tea?" she interrupted.

Mai gave her a frightened look. "I did."

A jumble of terrified thoughts and terrifying memories flitted through Thu's mind. In all the contemporary novels she'd read, girls who tried to take care of their "mistakes" often died from such things. She'd never imagined that she would find herself in one of those stories.

"I don't know how long it'll take, but I'm scared to be alone," Mai continued. "Can I stay with—with you two? Just in case something happens?"

"You need to go to a hospital," Thu said.

"No!" Mai gripped her hand. "I can't! I can't let anybody else know! I only came here because"—again her eyes flicked to Ralph—"because I thought you'd understand. Please—"

Suddenly she clutched at her stomach. A small whimper escaped her lips as she bent over, curling in on herself.

Thu staggered to her feet. Ralph reached out a hand to steady her. "What's going on?" he asked.

"She's pregnant," she said shortly. "And she just drank an abortive herbal tea."

Their horrified eyes met, and Thu realized that Ralph was panicking just as she was. Neither of them knew what to do. Mai's whimper was growing louder and louder, until it became a muffled scream. She stumbled from the couch onto the floor and lay there in the fetal position, writhing, her screams clawing at every single one of Thu's nerves until she felt like screaming herself. Fumbling, she knelt down to lift Mai up. To her horror, a bloom of red was spreading on the back of Mai's áo dài, staining the floor tiles underneath. Ralph saw too, and went white as a sheet. Both of them took a step back, looking as helplessly as the bleeding girl on the floor.

"We have to get her to a hospital," he said.

Mai was still conscious, and the word "hospital" must have gotten through to her, as it sounded similar enough to the French hôpital. She shook her head and panted, in Vietnamese, through pale lips, "No, no hospital, please—"

"We're not letting you die!" Thu shouted. She turned to Ralph. "But how can we get her there? It's New Year's Eve, there's no rickshaw. Can we call an ambulance? Are there ambulances?"

Ralph chewed on his lips. Then he said, "I'll carry her. The hospital is just down the street. It's quicker. Get her bag."

His decisive voice brought some life back to Thu's numb body. She picked up Mai's bag, threw on her own jacket, and tried to help Ralph into his coat, but he shook his head, indicating that she should drape it over Mai instead. The girl was by now too weak to protest, while red continued to spread on the back of her ivory silk áo dài and drip down her legs.

They ran down the empty street. Slants of cozy yellow light peeked out behind closed doors and windows, and a smell of incense drifted out over the street, along with the soft sound of talk and laughter as families got together for the New Year. The smell and sound twisted Thu's heart as the memories of family reunions surfaced in her mind and reminded her of how alone all three of them were—neither Ralph, Mai, nor herself had any family here. They had no one except for each other.

Ralph stopped in front of a building with Hôpital indigène du Protectorat on its front. Thu recognized it as Vietnam-Germany Hospital in modern day, though it was strictly a surgical center now. How lucky that it was already here at this time!

They rushed into the emergency room. Upon seeing them, the two nurses on duty, both men, sprang into action.

"What happened?" one of them asked Thu in Vietnamese. He had a face like a shovel and looked quite put out at having to work on New Year's Eve.

"She—I think she has a miscarriage," Thu replied, unwilling to tell the truth, not knowing how these men were going to judge Mai.

The nurse turned to Ralph. "Êtes-vous son mari?"

Ralph flushed and shook his head. "Non," he replied, glancing at Thu. "Um—"

Thu could guess the source of his discomfiture easily enough. "Please, he's my—husband," she said, putting a hand on his arm. "And she's my sister. Please help her."

The two nurses glanced at each other, then one of them grabbed a stretcher. "Put her on here," he said. Ralph complied, while Thu lifted up his coat. The nurses rolled the stretcher through the door and down the corridor. Thu was all set to follow them, but then she remembered, turned, and stopped Ralph.

"I can stay," she said. "You go."

"I'm not leaving you alone—"

"I can handle it." She pressed his coat into his arms. "You don't want them to ask questions about you. Go home, Ralph. I'll be fine."

Ralph hesitated at the door, before taking her hand and dropping a quick kiss on her temple. "Let me know if—if anything happens, OK?" he said.

"OK," she said, trying to smile.

***

Thu sat in the chilly corridor, watching the swaying lamp overhead casting its dizzying shadows over the floor, while around her, nurses ran back and forth with trays of cotton wool, bandages,  and other scary-looking instruments. She buttoned her jacket up to her chin, wishing she hadn't sent Ralph home, missing the warmth of his coat, the reassurance of his presence.

She'd lost all sense of time, until a faint burst of firecrackers somewhere in the street signaled it was midnight. Out with the Year of the Snake, in with the Year of the Horse. She'd missed it. But her heart was in such turmoil over Mai that she hardly cared. Deep down, she knew none of this was her fault. Louis had probably gotten Mai pregnant before Thu even met him. But somehow, she couldn't stop blaming herself. She could've told Mai to use contraceptives. She could've guessed that Mai was pregnant and found a safer way to help the girl deal with it. Heck, she could even have asked Homeless Pete to bring Mai to the 21st century and taken her to a modern hospital. What good was her modern knowledge if she couldn't use it to help these people? She leaned her head back against the wall and closed her eyes.

A while later, could be a few minutes, could be over an hour, a French doctor stepped out of the surgery behind her, accompanied by the shovel-faced nurse. Thu sprang to her feet. The doctor said something, and she turned to the nurse with a questioning look.

"Your sister is out of danger," the nurse said in Vietnamese. "Just a bit more delay and it might have been too late to save her."

Thu sank back onto the bench, her knees weak with relief. "Thank you," she said. "Merci, docteur. May I see her?" she asked the nurse.

The nurse nodded. "I'll take you to her." As he led the way down the corridor, he muttered loudly, "This is what comes of that new-fangled feminism... All these girls, running around, no parents, no husband, thinking they can do whatever they want... And the French want to modernize them? Well, the French are welcome to them!" Clearly, he meant for her to hear it. An angry retort bubbled to her lips, but she bit it back.

It being New Year's Eve, the only patient in the room was Mai. She lay on a bed in the corner of the room, hooked to a steadily dripping IV line. Her face and hands, poking out of a thin blanket, looked almost as white as the sheets, but her eyes opened upon hearing Thu approach.

Thu sat down gently on a chair next to the bed and took Mai's limp, ice-cold hand. "I'm sorry for this," she said. "But we couldn't let you die."

"No, don't apologize," Mai said, her voice hoarse. "You've saved my life. You and—"

"Ralph," Thu said, without thinking.

Mai looked confused. "I thought his first name was A-something?"

Thu cursed inwardly and fumbled for an explanation. "Yes, Alphonse. But—uh, I call him Ralph. That's, uh—his middle name."

"You love him, don't you?" A faint smile crossed Mai's face as she watched Thu blush, but the corners of her mouth barely lifted before they drooped again. "And he loves you. So lucky..."

"Forget Louis, Mai," Thu said. "You're safe now, that's the important thing. Is there anything you need?"

Mai shook her head. "I'll be all right for now. Just—please, don't let people at the office know..."

"Don't worry, I'll tell them something. Get some rest. I'll be back later, OK?"

"Thank you."

Thu sat with Mai for a little longer, until she was sure the girl had fallen asleep. She then walked back to the studio, through the street that lay wrapped in sleep, with only a few stragglers here and there, coming home from New Year's Eve celebrations, most carrying some tree branches with new buds on them as a symbol of a fresh start. Her feet dragged over the asphalt road darkening under the drizzling rain. Her grandfather always said that it was good luck to have a bit of a drizzle on the Lunar New Year. She wondered what kind of luck this rain was bringing Mai. Red remnants of firecrackers covered the ground, scattering across the pavement and pooling into dips on the road like blood. Thu sidestepped them, shivering.

She found Ralph slumped on the couch. He had mopped up the blood on the floor, but there were still some brown stains on the sleeves of his shirt, transferred from Mai when he carried her. Their New Year feast remained on the sideboard, untouched. Hearing Thu enter, he sat up and rubbed his eyes. "How is she?" he asked.

"She'll be OK. We got her there just in time."

He let out a sigh of relief. "Thank God." He went over to her, took her jacket and bag, and brushed a few strands of hair away from her pale face. "You should get some sleep. You look exhausted."

"So do you."

"Let's get cleaned up and get to bed then."

As they were snuggled up together, Thu said, her head on Ralph's shoulder, "I'm sorry your first Lunar New Year is ruined."

"Don't be silly. There'll be others."

Will there? And will I still be here?

Misunderstanding her silence, Ralph said, "You know I will never abandon you like that, don't you? If you—if you do get pregnant—"

"I won't," she said. "That's the one point the rules are very clear about. Don't impregnate or get impregnated."

"Yes, but still. If that does happen, I'll take care of you. And the baby. You have my promise, Autumn."

That wasn't what she was worrying about, but Thu smiled at him anyway. "I know." She gave him a kiss. "Go to sleep, Ralph."

As she lay her head back down, however, her smile disappeared. Despite Ralph's arms around her, she felt restless, disturbed. It wasn't just the anxiety and the exhaustion of the night, but something else. Some fundamental change had occurred. She didn't quite know what it was, but it had cracked the perfect veneer of her last few weeks with Ralph, showing the darkness hidden underneath, just as a glance behind the jolly, brightly lit teahouses and dance halls of Kham Thien had revealed its seedy alleys. She cuddled closer to Ralph and tried to sleep, while on the streets, young masters and misses, dressed to the nines, set out for their New Year parties, oblivious to the relentless, cold, gray rain.

Chapter 12

[lightwoodbanethings]

AO3

Part one || two || three || five

Eddie had tried his best, honest he had. But there’s only so long he can go pretending that Steve barely exists before he needs to pounce. He was used to toning things down in public, he wasn’t stupid (contrary to popular belief about the super highschool senior) and he knew to be careful. 

But the small touches, the acting friendly and knowing looks helped him survive until he was able to get Steve alone. However, Steve had pretty much ordered Eddie to act like they were barely friends when this Murray guy was around. Steve wouldn’t elaborate on why but Eddie had a pretty solid guess. So whenever group events and hangouts were organised he’d immediately deflate at the mention of Murray joining them. The only consolation of the most recent movie night was that it was happening at Steve’s house and Eddie could stay behind to ‘help clean up’. 

So Eddie arrived, few rugrats in tow, and gave Steve a polite curt nod before going to chat with Dustin. He spent the whole night pretty much ignoring Steve’s existence and distracting himself by talking Dungeons and Dragons with Will, discussing the beauty of Purple Palm Tree Delight with Jonathan and even chatting to Joyce about her fantastic meatloaf (of which she had brought leftovers for Wayne and Eddie). But the need to just be near Steve had him feeling like there was an itch under his skin that he just couldn’t soothe. 

The movie started and everyone made themselves comfortable, either on a chair, sofa or some blankets and pillows on the floor. Eddie sat down with a space next to him and Steve gave him a look of ‘I’m sorry’ before walking straight past him and sitting pretty much as far away as possible. Nancy plonked herself down next to Eddie and gave him a gentle comforting look whilst Robin and Steve snuggled together, ready to watch the movie. 

He tried to focus on what was happening on the screen in front of him but couldn’t help peering over at Steve, every now and then he’d even catch Steve looking over his way. They’d give each other a small smile and turn their attention back to the movie. After so long Steve mumbled something to Robin and then got up, heading in the direction of the kitchen. Eddie watched after him before turning back to the screen, but he just couldn’t get comfortable and kept squirming in his seat. Nothing felt right, not the way he was sat, not the film, not his clothes against his skin or the rings on his fingers. He just couldn’t do it anymore, so he got up and went after Steve.

He found the other boy in the kitchen, refilling the snack bowls with various treats. He always managed to get everyone’s favourites, the care Steve put into these movie nights made Eddie’s heart want to burst with love. Even though Steve couldn’t see it himself, he was one of the most caring and selfless people Eddie had ever met. He quietly made his way over to Steve and gently put his hands on his waist. Steve jumped at the initial contact, almost dropping an open bag of chips on the floor. 

“Eddie!” Steve hissed quietly at the older boy, “we’re supposed to be being subtle, remember?” 

“How could I forget Stevie, you won’t even look at me.”

Even though Steve couldn’t see Eddie’s face, he knew for a fact he was pouting. 

“I just wanted a quick cuddle, something to help keep me going before I perish” Eddie said in a small pathetic voice, really putting it on. 

Steve sighed, his boyfriend was definitely one for being dramatic. But Steve couldn’t deny that he also missed being close to Eddie. The feeling of his boyfriend wrapping himself around him and holding him close to his chest did feel nice, comforting and safe. 

He put down the chips and turned around so he could look at his boyfriends pretty face and run his hands through his curly hair. 

“I’m sorry babe, but once everyone’s gone I’m all yours. You can stay the night, if you want?”

Eddie smiled, even after all this time when Steve would ask Eddie about something he wanted, such as spending the night, he still sounded unsure. Almost like he was worried Eddie didn’t really want him or he was going to say no. It almost broke his heart, but slowly Eddie was helping build up Steve’s confidence that Eddie did want him and always would. 

“Sounds great pretty boy, but how about we pop out for a quick smoke break before going back to the movie?” Eddie asked with a raised eyebrow and a smirk.

Steve knew for a fact this wasn’t going to be a ‘smoke break’, but he nodded and allowed Eddie to lead him out the back of his house anyway.

My little British brain: THEY'RE CALLED CRISPS!