#how he does have flaws and he is cruel but his cruelty comes so deeply from love and how everyone in knights needs to learn how to again

[raelyn-dreams]

Some characters get so much more interesting when you look outside the fandom view and get to know them on their own terms.

[hot-lesbian-knight]

This articulated my feelings on John really really well, cause like yeah The Necrolord Prime is pretty fucking awful, he is the direct and specific cause of suffering on a level we cannot comprehend. But John Gaius before it all was just a flawed man with good intentions. Hell there's even that line from C- when John is planning to hold the Trillionaires hostage with nukes about him caring less about being a savior than he does about dealing out punishment and how she loves him but he can be the most appallingly vindictive person she's even known.

John is just a man, but a man who's been given unbelievable power, and that unbelievable power takes all of John's flaws and magnifies the scale and scope of what those flaws effect . One tired stressed man of science whos got a vindictive streak really wishing all the Trillionaires would explode because of how much they have hurt him is understandable and honestly so fucking relatable. But once you give someone that ultimate power, those whims and that vindictive anger is suddenly a lot more scary and a lot less reasonable.

John is such a phenomenal character specifically because he is so relatable, he's just a guy with flaws who's been made all powerful and immortal and now has had to live through the consequences of every vindictive impulsive cruel choice he's made. He may be a horrible twisted person who's cruel and violent and vindictive in the extreme, but he's still so appallingly human in all his actions.

Everyone has cruel vindictive urges and thoughts. If you've worked retail you've wished you could explode someone with your mind before, even if you would never you've still thought about it. But now imagine if you're fleeting little vindictive thought would actually make them explode because you've become a god all of a sudden with no instructions or explanation, you've suddenly got the power to make those shitty asshole retail customers who are making your life hell just dissolve with your mind and it happens at the speed of thought.

Tamsyn is an author that does not write in black and white, only shades of grey. Each character in this series cannot be so simply sorted into "Good" or "Bad" because they are all complex nuanced characters in terrible, impossible situations making messy human choices that would normally kill people except that it doesn't and now they have to live with the consequences.

So yeah, John has done unimaginable harm and cruelty and is an appallingly vindictive person, but he's also fundamentally a person. No one in his position, no matter how noble or steadfast, would come out of this on top, no one could have handled that level of absolute power in that pressure cooker of a situation without being twisted and corrupted. Absolute power corrupts absolutely and all that jazz.

I deeply love John, he's such a fascinating character who's trying his damned best. I deeply hate John, he's such a vile little worm of a man. I would kill him if I had the chance just to put him out of our misery, I would hug him if I had the chance just to give him some comfort, I would see him put to rest because no one should have to live for 10000 years.

God I sound like Mercymorn...

I think what bothers me most about how John is talked about in the fandom is the implication that a different (implied: better) person would've done things differently and somehow more right than he did.

When the text goes to lengths to explore how suddenly coming into an incredible amount of power in a fatally constrained situation cannot lead to a good outcome.

If you're putting John in dialogue with the concept of the "magical girl", which Muir has said he is (a little tongue in cheek, but)--these are young, often profoundly unready people, who often get taken advantage of by the people who give them their powers. And like, yes, John is not a teenager, but I think that's part of the point, is that at no point is a person really prepared to become as powerful as he did--even before he merged with Alecto. Even when he was fully in control of his powers, even when they were given with honest intent and trust, even when he used them with the best of intentions and tried to do the right thing, there was no way for him to be prepared, especially given the situation he was in.

And it's funny to talk about how bad John must be in bed, but also, this isn't a scenario where John is some self-deluding Elon Musk-like villain or loser. He is genuinely trying to do the right thing, in terms of rescuing the Earth's population, rescuing the Earth Herself, and doing it ethically (see: M--'s insistence that they perfect the cryo containers until they could transport pregnant women).

I really do think this is something people are blocking out, because it is one of the uncomfortable parts of Muir's message with the series. But ESPECIALLY because the people "critiquing" him as an embodiment of patriarchy and empire are failing to see that part of Muir's critique is of human vulnerability to power: That is, that power corrupts.

And this even has echoes with Gideon & Harrow's story! Harrow begins the series in a deeply unequal dynamic with Gideon! And she does horrible things, not just because she is traumatized, but because she is traumatized and has the power to act her desires out on Gideon. She might have the motive (trauma), but that's not enough without the means (power).

And, yeah, I do have a semi-salty angle on this because people are frequently loath to think critically not just about axes of oppression but individual relationships of power when it applies to them and to people they like. ESPECIALLY when there is a very vocal segment of the fandom that is enthusiastically pro-harassment. It's very convenient to villainize John and actively dis-identify with him, because otherwise, you'd have to face the question of whether you'd do any better in his place. But the thing is, the mission of revenge he embarks on is a lot closer to many peoples' hearts than they'd like to consider.

That's the whole point.