#how good a job it does over time. thanks for coming to my ted talk

[unloneliest]

is there a questionable content tumblr community. i’m blazing through a reread right now and the only thing in my mind is these prototypical blorbos

[ebi-noodle-doodles]

TOONIZE VOCALOID

Figurine blabber time (again!)

Guys I’m genuinely jumping from joy when I finally got these because they. are. so. freakin. CUTE. I love how silly and cute they look! The vibrant colors of the figure does not disappoint & they pop off so much from other figurines. It compliments the style so much! I love this figure because of the style and it they did an amazing job of nailing the style for the figure! Its simple but I love how you can still feel and see the artist’s original style! There are two variations of this colored figurine but I personally prefer this vibrant versions because it so pleasing in the eye when displayed! I love the palette choice too, its contrast of colors makes the figure look more interesting and fun to look at!

The material choice on other parts are also such a good touch! The glossy boots and sleeves makes them feel alive! There are hints of colors in these glossy parts that doesn’t disturb the palette and make them dull but instead harmonizes with the over all look <3!

Theyre slightly bigger than your average prize figure, about 1.5 nendoroid tall for nendo scale XD They have big flat plastic base with their corresponding color theme! They feel sturdy and look absolutely great in anyone’s shelf or collection or just in your desk!

thank you for coming to my ted talk!

[chaos-in-deepspace]

LNDS: Bongo Butts | 18+

I should be going to bed but I forgot to do laundry so here I am, writing more content that nobody asked for. Just like motorboating them...when I see them butts. Just. WHAM BAM. Thanks for coming to my TED talk. Also hope you know I had to research different types of dump trucks for this fic.

Disclaimer: This is an original fan work for “Love and Deepspace”. Do not repost on other platforms or plagiarize. All characters shown in this fic is 18+. Warnings: Ass Slapping, Crack Fic, Playing their asses like they're bongos, Zayne's lost sanity, Rafayel is scandalized as per usual, you mentally scar Raf, Xavier is confused as per usual, but is he confused?, he does get you back tho

Blog Information | Masterlist

Xavier

Xavier really did need to be more careful around you. He was the one who wanted you to date him first, in your defense. He chose you. And you wouldn't let a single day go by that you didn't prove why that was a horrible decision on his end. At the very least, he could claim that he was never bored with you around.

Today was supposed to be a lazy day. You two had off from all missions and were relaxing around the apartment since it was too damn hot to actually go outside. It also happened to be laundry day for Xavier, so he was dressed in his workout attire while his uniforms were being deep cleaned from all the dirt that accumulated on them during his missions.

Those shorts. They were so damn short. You'd even call it slutty because hot damn. His ass was just right there. It was staring at you. Hypnotizing you like it was a snake charmer. Your hands were already twitching in a grabby motion as you stared directly at those perfectly rounded globes on his backside. His beautiful bubble butt.

Xavier could feel your stare burning into him as he looked over his shoulder. He was just sun bathing by the window, laying on his stomach. So vulnerable to your upcoming attack.

"Something you need?" Damn, he already sounded suspicious. It might've been by how you were practically drooling with your hands up, ready to grab at him. It was a slight give away. He should've been more prepared though, because you lunged at him in that moment.

He only had time to turn slightly when you pushed him back on his stomach, sitting on his back to pin him down. Your hands took a fistful of his ass before you began hitting them with little force. Just watching them jiggle with every little slap of your hands.

You were cackling like a maniac as you continued your assault until he managed to maneuver you off of him. You were laughing, your cheeks flushed as you almost teared up. His entire face was red as he stared at you in horror. Then you saw a flash in his eyes and you knew you were done for.

He grabbed you, pulling you onto his lap. Then you felt a harsh slap at your ass, making you squeal. It was so much rougher than you had hit him. He stared at your back side and did it again.

"I can see why you found this so entertaining. I think I'll play with this for now."

"Unhand me you creatine!"

"I think not, if I let you go, who knows what else you'll do to me."

Zayne

Anyone who has ever had the pleasure of laying eyes on Akso's best Cardiac Surgeon knew that one thing was a pure fact. He had an ass. His doctor's coat did a good job concealing it, but he couldn't wear it all the time. You had even noticed a few nurses who would glance down at him when he passed them in the hallway.

It was something you knew very well about Zayne, and something the man seemed oblivious to. The man didn't just have a dump truck as a rear end, it was a dump trailer. That shit could keep a family fed for an entire year. It was so perfect in every way. You could grab onto one cheek with both hands and you still wouldn't be able to capture the entire thing.

Yet for some reason, Zayne had no idea just how badly you needed his ass. You would often times find yourself staring at it when you hung out, had an appointment, or were just lounging at the apartments. It plagued your thoughts. You were losing sleep over this. It wasn't good for your health.

"Zayne..." You said as you relaxed on the couch next to him. You two were catching up on a TV show that you started well over a month ago but hadn't had time to really enjoy it.

"Yes, did you need something?" Oh how sweet he was, always looking out for you.

"Yes actually...can you lay down on your stomach for me? I wanna do something." You said, knowing that this man would do just about anything you asked. He eyed you for a moment, contemplating if he wanted to play this game with you.

"Might I inquire as to why?"

"That's for me to know, and you to find out."

Zayne took one more moment before giving in. He adjusted his position, laying down on his stomach just as you had asked. You decided to be subtle, leaning over his form and placing your hands on his shoulders at first. You gently caressed the skin there, massaging the muscles through his shirt as you slowly made your way down to the small of his back.

There it was. The prize. The holy grail of all asses. It was ripe for the taking as you looked over to see Zayne's closed eyes as he relaxed under your touch. You didn't hesitate. Your hands slapping down on his ass and grabbing it roughly.

His eyes shot open as he looked over at you. You licked your lips as you began gently slapping the flesh, watching the bounce as though it were made of jelly. It was a sight to behold and you couldn't help yourself. You had seconds before Zayne reacted and pulled your grubby little hands off him.

So you leaned your head in and bit down. His pants managed to cushion him from the force of your bite, but he sure as hell felt it. He sat up and grabbed you under the arms like a cat, stopping you in your tracks as you stared at him.

"What do you think you're doing?"

"Playing with your nice ass."

"My butt is not a play thing."

You paused for a moment, eyes trailing down to the front of his pants, "If you aren't gonna let me slap your ass, can I play with your dick like it's a Bop-It?"

You watched Zayne go through five stages of grief. He sighed as he grabbed a blanket next to him, wrapping your entire body like a burrito so your limbs were no longer effective. He then sat back down on the couch with his legs open and placed you between, holding you tightly to his chest.

"I'm begging you, please be quiet for once and let's finish this show."

Rafayel

He should've known you were up to something if your gaze was anything to go off of. You had zeroed in on him the moment you had come over. Even during your little date as you two explored Linkon together, he knew something was up. Your not so subtle glances in his direction couldn't be considered innocent.

If only he knew why you were staring so hardcore. He had gotten a new pair of pants, or at least you assumed they were new. You were pretty sure you'd remember them with how good he looked at the moment. It was tight on him, accentuating his ass perfectly. You were pretty sure if you riled him it would also perfectly outline another aspect of him.

Still, you had a mission. Rafayel didn't know it yet, but the moment you had caught a glimpse of him this morning, you knew what had to be done. His muffins needed to be squished. His plump little cushions had to be properly admired and worshipped. You would be the one to happily give them the attention they deserved. An ass sculpted by the gods themselves were staring at you literally all day.

You closed the door to his home slowly, turning over to him. He was already heading to the living room. You slowly stalked behind him, and he could feel you were up to no good.

"Something caught your interest? I know I look good, but not even you normally stare at me this much."

"I just think you look particularly handsome today is all." As does his ass. You couldn't say that yet though, he would realize what your plans were if you verbalized it too early. Like a cat stalking a mouse, you followed him until he was in the living room. The moment he was by the couch you took action.

You rushed behind him and pressed down on the small of his back, making him stumble forward. He grabbed the edge of the couch, his body hunched over. Rafayel turned just in time to watch you drop down to your knees. Then he felt your hands harshly gripping his ass. Then the quick slaps in succession followed as you began laughing maniacally.

"Finally!" You said as you grabbed at them again. Rafayel finally reacted, rolling onto the couch to get away from your hands. You were practically panting as your hands twitched, "Come on Raf, lemme just squeeze em again."

"You are a psychopath." He said, hiding his ass from your view.

"I'm your psychopath though." Despite how horrified Rafayel looked, he was also amused by your antics. He grabbed at your arm, making you fall forward and your chest pressing against his own. His hands went to grab at your ass this time, squeezing them and laughing.

"You know, I think I'm seeing the appeal of this." He commented, his hands lazily hitting your ass cheeks like you had to him, although he was far more calm about it.

"See, it's amazing...now can I go back to playing with your butt? I wasn't done yet."

"I think not...although this has given me an idea. Do you mind if I paint your backside?"

"You wanna paint on my ass?"

"Perhaps."

"...I'll agree if you let me eat your-" Rafayel had never cut you off so quickly.

"Never mind."

The most accurate representation of what we're doing to these poor men. I will not be silenced. Their asses need to be slapped. And ate

[benedictscanvas]

pick me up at seven - roy kent x reader

pairing: roy kent x fem!reader

word count: 3.1k (they won't all be this long i don't think!!)

warnings: language of course, and this is a little steamy but with no actual smut. my favourite genre HA

request: I can’t find any good Roy fics until your recent one and I’m dying for more 😭 Anyway you could write something else for him? Maybe they’re at a bar and he gets pissed when he sees Jamie flirting w her? (Not a pre established relationship) - @kashee-h

a/n: your wish is my demand!! i'm so happy you enjoyed the first roy fic of what i hope are many to come. this one totally got away from me, i loved writing it so so much, thanks for a request that I really got to make my own! <3

---

Roy is the one who’s invited you here. Roy is the one who trekked over to your office at the end of the working day and told you that everyone was going out that evening. Roy is the one who suggested you come, even when you seemed reluctant to join in on what appeared to be an evening for just the players and the coaches. Roy is the one who convinced you that it would be fun, that he’d make sure of it.

All of this is making it very hard for Roy to accept that you are currently sat in a corner booth with someone else. The fact that the person you seemed to be having such an in depth conversation with was Jamie fucking Tartt was the icing on a very shit cake.

He knew he could be having a better night than just sitting on a barstool trying not to watch the two of you, especially when Ted and Beard arrived to get the next round and he didn’t even acknowledge them. They’d hired out a private room, so it was filled with people he generally tolerated the company, some he’d even go as far as to say that he liked. None of that was registering, however. 

Jamie leans in when you can’t hear something he’s said and he watches you nod solemnly, duck your head to stare at the floor as if flustered, and he wants to walk right out that door and never come back. Maybe he could get a job at Chelsea, or something.

“Now, what’s wrong, Jeremy Strong?” Ted asks, and Roy has to bite back a ‘fuck off’ so hard he wonders if his lip is bleeding, “You look just about ready to start wreckin’ the place.”

Out of the corner of Roy’s eye, he sees Beard lean in to whisper in Ted’s ear and points over at you. Ted looks surprised. Roy does not want to deal with this.

“You’re telling’ me our very own Mr Kent has his eyes on our very own Miss Y/L/N? Well, that’s just great! She’s sweet as anythin’, good for you, Roy.”

“She’s sweet on Jamie fucking Tartt, more like,” he says, even though he knows he’s being so fucking unfair. He hates it about himself. He knows how hard he’s worked on these feelings, on frustration and anger and jealousy, knows that a few years ago he’d be getting ready to fight Jamie down an alley further through tonight. Now he’s done that work, however, he can recognise the overriding feeling that he’s actually just hurt and that’s so much worse. It’s much easier to be jealous than upset.

“Does this call for an impromptu meeting of the Diamond Dogs?” Ted asks brightly and Roy is only able to stop him after his second howl. Higgins has looked over briefly but Beard signals him to stay where he is.

“Fuck no,” Roy blurts out, then reconsiders. Maybe he could at least talk to Ted, “I just- I was going to tell her. Tonight.”

“Tell her what?” Ted’s doing that thing where he bats his eyelashes like he’s in some sort of rom-com. Beard’s got his head resting in his hand, looking similarly up at Roy. They’re insufferable. 

“That I fucking like her, okay? Take those fucking looks off your faces.”

Ted and Beard scramble to look normal but come up short. Ted’s got the awful kind of shit-eating grin on his face that he gets when he sees Sam and Jamie hugging or watches Isaac doing his handshakes with everyone before a game.

“So, you’ve been spending time together? Or are you telling her out of the blue?” Beard pipes up.

Roy thinks that over. You’ve been spending a lot of time together actually. More than anyone at the club would probably even believe. He slips away to your office to eat lunch under the guise of needing a break from the American Circus downstairs. You text him when you’ve brought in ice cream because you know he’ll never say no to ice cream. You’ve met Phoebe. That one was by accident in the park, but you stuck around for four fucking hours and nobody made you.

Still, he wonders whether it would be completely shocking to you or whether you’ve been waiting for him to make a proper move. You’re incredibly difficult to read alongside being so stupidly pretty that sometimes he wants to swear less around you. He doesn’t manage it, of course, but he thinks it.

“Yes, we’ve spent time together. No, I don’t know what that means. Probably doesn’t mean shit to her, not that it would be her fault if she doesn't.”

Ted and Beard tilt their heads simultaneously at him and he wishes he could bash their heads together for a moment.

“But it means somethin’ to you, hey coach? I don’t think Miss Y/N sittin’ with Jamie should stop you from tellin' her how you feel about ‘er, hey coach?”

Roy’s lost track of which coach Ted is even talking to, but Beard chimes in.

“Surely her spending time with Jamie should be all the more incentive to tell her. Find out how she feels. Get that crushing disappointment out of the way now. It’s only downhill from here.”

Roy raises a brow at him as Ted gives him a look. Beard sighs, then picks up his drink and seems to disappear. Ted leans into Roy.

“Him and Jane are on a break again, I’m sorry. Look I’m goin’ to have to go find him but he was right, until he wasn’t. Go get ‘er, Ross Gellar!”

And with that, Ted’s gone too, weaving his way through crowds of people until he’s lost to them. When Roy glances back in your direction, Jamie’s got Colin and Isaac beside him instead and you’re nowhere to be found. He sighs and stands from his barstool, making his way to the exit. Maybe he’d think about what Ted and Beard had said tomorrow: for now, he just wanted to go home.

Except for the fact that when he finally managed to push his way outside to breathe in some fresh air, he found you. Leaning against the wall of the club, with definite tears in your eyes, even under the dim street lamp light. He was going to murder Jamie Tartt, slowly, with rope and paint and suffering involved.

But he knew to take a slightly softer approach with you. If at all possible.

“Hey,” he says quietly, trying not to startle you. You're quick to look up at him, startled anyway, and he grits his teeth as he asks, “Are you alright?”

He doesn’t make any comment about what the fuck Jamie had done to you. Doesn’t think it would be received all that well. Again, he’s biting the inside of his lip harder than ever.

“Yes! Oh god, yes, sorry,” you’re blinking furiously. He admires your resolve when the nearly teary face is quickly replaced by that bright smile that makes him weaker in the knees than he already is, “Fuck, sorry. I’m all good. I’m not sure this is my scene, I was just going to call a taxi.”

There’s an opening. He’ll be damned if he’s not taking it, even though confessing anything is the furthest idea from his mind - he’s much more focused on making sure you’re okay and nobody’s done anything to hurt you. If they have, he's already resigned to a short stint in jail if necessary.

“Do you want to walk?”

“Uh, I mean not really. It’s quite late, so…”

“With me, I mean,” he quickly clarified, wanting to bash his head against the brick wall, “I could walk you home, if you wanted. Or not. That’s fine too.”

“Oh, right,” you’re looking down at your feet as you contemplate it, “That would be nice, if you’re sure. Thank you.”

“It’s nothing,” he insists, falling into step beside you as you begin to walk. He wants to give you his jacket and maybe his shirt too with the way you’re shivering, but he can’t bring himself to do it. He’s a fucking coward, but he will get to the bottom of what’s the matter if its the last thing he does, “You gonna tell me what’s wrong now?”

You huff out a frustrated sigh, at him, at yourself, he isn’t sure.

“I made a fucking fool of myself tonight,” you say eventually, and he can’t even imagine you doing that, “I thought…god, it doesn’t matter what I thought. Everything just feels worse when its…1:30 in the morning, don’t you think?”

You’d lifted his hand to check his watch before you said the time. Again, he wanted to hold on, but he let you drop his hand and it just went limp.

“It fucking does, yeah. Don’t think you could make a fucking fool of yourself if you tried though. Not around us lot.”

Your family, he heard Ted’s voice in his head. He was not fucking saying that. To his surprise, you let out a loud bark of a laugh at his words and he was staring at the side of your face as you spoke out into the dark air.

“I thought you were coming to pick me up tonight, you know?” you began, and his heart drops to his shoes. You’re upset about him?

“What?”

“Something you said earlier, when you asked me to come. You asked where I lived, then told me it would be a twenty minute walk to get there. Then you said ‘see you at seven’.”

He could have stopped walking. He had said that, but he was just trying to help you plan out your timings for the evening - you’d mentioned to him once that you were known for having some time blindness when you were getting ready for things. Of course he should have realised how fucking stupid that was, how much that sounded like he would come and walk with you.

He would have fucking loved to walk with you.

“Fuck!” he exclaimed, far too loudly for the quiet night that surrounded you. You carried on undeterred, shaking your head. He could see your frustration was at yourself now, and he hated himself even more than he had earlier.

“My fault for assuming, I know. But that’s why I was so late. And when I arrived, trying talk myself into not feeling like a twat, you were already over with Dani and Isaac and Bumbercatch, clearly never intending to come pick me up. Which, why would you, of course. I just…felt shit. Jamie tried to help, bless him, but I just wanted to go home, honestly.”

Roy is the biggest idiot on the planet. He wants to go back into the club and hug Jamie for looking after you, then ask him to punch him in the face. Roy could punch something, anything right now, but he just grits his teeth.

“I’m-” he grunts when his voice comes out all strangled, “I’m really fucking sorry, Y/N. I’m the fucking twat. I was asking where you lived and that to help you with that fucking time blindness thing you told me about. Should’ve known how it sounded though. Fucking idiot.”

He directed the last comment at himself, kicking a stone he’d found on the pavement. He kept his eyes firmly trained on his shoes as the two of you continued walking, now at a significantly slower pace. Your eyes were burning a hole in the side of his face.

There was a silence that stretched on as you stared at him, until-

“Fucking hell,” you groaned, “That’s so fucking sweet. You’re the worst.”

He doesn’t know if he can remember being called sweet before. Phoebe was often excessively complimentary of him in a way that made him uncomfortable, but sweet had never come up. He didn’t feel sweet.

“I am the worst,” he grunted, spiralling, “Making you feel so shit. Ruining your fucking night. I was the one who convinced you in the first place and now you’ve had a shit fucking time and I’m the worst.”

He’s a little out of breath and loud again by the end of his rant. The two of you have stopped walking. You kick the toe of your heel against his shoe, placating.

“No, you’re the worst ‘cause you keep giving me all this hope. I fucking hate hope, no matter what Ted says,” you chuckle to yourself, and he’s not sure what you’re saying but he’s peering into your now smiling expression as he tries to work it out, “Look, do you like me or not? You’re a good guy Roy and either way, I’m grateful that you’re walking me home. I just think if I ask, maybe I can just feel like a twat for the night and get it over with by tomorrow.”

“Do I…like you?”

He sounds thick. He feels thick. Feels like his mouth is full of honey that his tongue is having to wade through to even speak to you. It’s stuck to the bottom of his mouth, heavy.

“Yeah. As in, do you just enjoy eating lunch with me or do you ever look at me and just want to kiss me? Cause I do that all the fucking time, Roy, but I can’t be arsed to dance around it anymore.”

You look really tired as you stare up at him, but he feels more energised than ever. You’ve both just established that he’s the absolute worst, and yet here he is, with everything he could’ve wanted right in front of him. You, looking fucking gorgeous and looking at him like that? Even getting a job at Chelsea wouldn’t help him against you - he was gone.

There’s a smirk on his face that he can’t bite back as he takes your face in both his hands and revels in the gasp he can pull from you. He should have known you’d be the first to say something. You weren’t the coward he was.

“Let’s not fuck about then, yeah?”

Low and breathy. You respond with a nod so eager that he’s practically grinning when he pulls you in. It’s quickly replaced by a hunger he’s been keeping at bay, allowing his hands to slide into your hair as he deepens the kiss almost as soon as it’s started. He can feel your hands clutching at the lapels on his jacket, but he’s more excited when you throw your arms around his neck instead, tugging on the hair at the base of his head.

He growls and you actually whimper. It’s like he’s been set on fucking fire. Like he’s been struck by lightning.

When he pulls away for air, you stay close, peppering kisses along the scruff of his jaw, up the side of his face and back down again. He holds you to him tightly around your waist and feels wanted. He’s wanted you for so long, but to be wanted in return, so openly, it’s both hot and meaningful. He’s not sure anyone’s ever told him they liked him before. Most models he’d dated were pretty sold on the idea that he had to make all the moves.

Still, when you begin trailing kisses down his neck and there’s a hand on the top button of his shirt, he has enough sense about him to stop you. Even if he really doesn’t want to.

“I don’t know what street this is,” he breathes out, low voice little more than a rumble, “But maybe we don't give your neighbours a fucking show.”

You look thoroughly kissed when you look back at him, but he doesn’t think it’ll ever be enough. He leans in to kiss you once more to punctuate his sentence, watching as you duck your head, all shy, even though your arms are still around him. He knows now that when you ducked your head with Jamie, you were embarrassed. This is you properly flustered and it’s one of his favourite looks on you.

“Good call, yeah. Okay. I’m- I’m just around this corner, I think.”

“You think?”

“Shut up, you,” you whack him lightly on the shoulder, as the two of you resume walking, “Think you can make it all the way there?”

“I’d carry you if my knee wasn’t fucked,” he admits, watching you with a lopsided smile, “Really fucking like you, by the way. If that wasn’t proof. Thought you should hear me fucking say it.”

You close your eyes in a little half laugh - giddy, he thinks. 

“Well, I did wonder. We’ve spent a lot of time together the last few weeks for someone who doesn’t like spending time with people.”

“Your first clue,” he agrees, taking your hand with pride now as the two of you keep walking, turning the corner towards your house. The pace is a lot quicker than it was before. He hopes he knows why, “I’ll be less of a fucking idiot now. Promise.”

“Eh, don’t worry,” you shrug, letting go of his hand only to thread your arm through his and take hold of his hand again, even tighter, “Nothing sexier than fucking idiots. I like my men with no thoughts behind their eyes.”

He properly laughs at that, head tilted back, feeling your head against his arm as you laugh with him. You slow down, gesturing left. Your house. The two of you walk down the drive until you’re at the door, face to face again and Roy is having a small internal battle.

“Look, I know you said no show for the neighbours,” you begin, almost nervously, “But does that mean a…private show is totally off the table too?”

He watches you picking at your nails. Can’t help it. He pulls you in for another breathless kiss, just to watch you come alive again, confident and fucking into him, however much of a miracle it seems. You pull away this time, clearly keen for an answer, but he groans.

“Tryin’ to be a fucking gentleman, here. Why don’t we do dinner tomorrow? Proper date. And I’ll fucking pick you up.”

You giggle. Still, there’s a glint in your eyes, as you sigh melodramatically.

“That does sound nice. Only thing is, there could be an intruder in here, you know? So, and I’ll only ask once more and then I promise I’ll let you go if you say no, but maybe you should walk me to my bedroom? To make sure I’m safe, you know? And then you can pay for my breakfast in the morning like a good old fashioned gentleman, if you want.”

You’re looking up at him, all hopeful again. His resolve is dwindling. You spin your keys around one finger and its a simple gesture, but it’s the final straw.

“I’m paying for your fucking lunch too,” he growls, diving into you once again. He’s beside himself when he hears you mutter a faint ‘thank fuck’ as you fumble to unlock the door and all but drag him inside.

---

if you've read this far, i fucking love you, you beautiful sunflower <3 requests open for this angry man and his favourite jamie tartt if you're interested!!

[eyesxxyou]

dilf Hobie this, nerd loser Hobie that...

How about normal Hobie letting you hang out on his boat, making it your second home, your stuff littered around?

A friends of his spots you bra: "ah? this? thi' 's jus' my lady's. ignore tha'."

How about normal Hobie rambling to you about the government fucking everyone over while you make dinner together?

Normal Hobie stealing shit for you that you said you liked, normal Hobie handcrafting little gifts for you, a necklace, a lighter, a tamagotchi, and acting like it's no big deal when he gives it to you because he doesn't know how to act otherwise?

How about normal Hobie writing you songs, but they're all lyricless because he believes that lyrics about love are cheesy and don't stand the test of time quite like plain music does?

How about normal Hobie fucking you before a show and stuffing your panties in his back pocket, a little bit hanging out like some sick trophy to show off to his audience?

How about normal Hobie telling you all about the idea of soulmates being a concept made up by the capitalist propaganda to sell people more shit, especially on valentine's day, while getting matching stick and pokes on said day?

How about normal Hobie and you drinking at a pub, laughing about something that wasn't even funny while others look at you like you're high? (you probably are too)

How about normal Hobie telling you all about how good you are for him while you help him treat his wounds? his hands trying to reach your face, probably litter it with kisses, while you try to keep them away until you finish your job.

How about normal Hobie keeping an arm around you at all times to show that you're his? he's not doing it because he's jealous, hell no, he wants others to be.

How about normal Hobie giving you free piercings? the septum that you always wanted? give him 10 minutes. the belly piercing that you thought would sorta fit one outfit you have? don't need to ask twice. those nipple piercings that you find cute? he's so absolutely gonna help them get hard before piercing them, kissing you to keep your mind occupied from the pain.

How about just normal Hobie in general? our boy deserves so much love, let's not forget about him.

thank you for coming to my TED talk 😇 - 💡

NORMAL HOBIE IS SUPERIOR TO ALL OTHER TYPES. HE IS THEIR MOTHER. GIVE ME MORE REGULAR HOBIE

[tetedurfarm]

now that the seasons are starting to turn again i'm looking at the rabbits and planning out my fall/winter litters....i don't get many litters in winter in general though i do try every month to keep some of them from getting fat. i'm thinking of making more fun meat litters since i put SO much focus on show litters over summer

it's funny, because i spent so much time and feed on show animals and i feel like i got like...nothing out of that. i know part of it is because i lost a few litters to my negligence on vaccinating, but man i forget just how unforgiving showing is. you might get one kit per litter that's worth keeping - and that's if you aren't working with marked breeds, which i am. i do look at my hotots and feel like i am making some decent progress, though only one single keeper is actually a purebred :/ the himis are still spinning in a net zero, after admitting that i needed to cull like all my bucks and start over, and also losing all of my original does this year as well to various age-related ailments. i have one more litter of sausages under mom right now and we'll see how they turn out

i have bred basically zero rex - i think i did a couple early in the year but niña's litter are the first ones i've had since spring which is wild to me. spencer SHOULD be pregnant now too which will be fun! i have gotten a frankly pitiful amount of satins born, to the point where after this latest attempt i am probably giving up on standard satin and trying out minis :/ i think i can get away with avoiding peanuts without them getting too big, and i can work with a variety i love but is underdeveloped. i just want something typey to beef up my skills at the little nuances....please....

this winter/next spring i also think i will be needing to think about breeding basil's replacement....she did a good job with her last litter but she had some trouble regaining her condition afterwards. i don't think she's done yet, but i need to think about it. i already know that my keeper will be by orpheus because combining my two most amazing meat lines Ever will only create the ultimate rabbit to end all rabbits. but i just gotta sit and wait for the Perfect doe to appear

anyway thank you for coming to my ted talk about rabbit planning that was actually just me talking at the void. i think overall i had a good year but i don't feel like i made tons of progress on my showing goals. oh well. always the rest of the year and next year :)

[cottonkhaleesi]

a rare non-crafty post from me today: So this tonsillitis is kicking my ass thoroughly and thus the soft brain wants comfort movies, and what's more comforting (about to really date myself here) than the Jonathan Creek Christmas Specials.

Seriously, they bring back a whole host of feels for me, my ma loved detective and whodunnit stories, my da loved magic tricks, and I loved watching the interplay of characters that you could have picked up of the street so well written were their foibles and talents.

Jonathan Creek especially fascinated me by having such a quick mind and not caring that the world didn't appreciate his special interests but also blatantly awkward and bad with people in a real way. Think Sherlock Holmes if Sherlock Holmes grew up at a state school, wasn't ambitious or overtly pushed, learnt the basics of how to get along with people by osmosis and was absolutely harmless -I can't stress that enough Jonathan Creek is not dangerous due to his vast intellect and knowledge, he is just a guy, who happens to be good at his job which is setting up tricks and thus is suited to unravelling them as well. And the women / love interests are all their own characters, not suped up Hollywood caricatures of women, but women with their own agendas who are often won over by Jonathan through exposure to the way his mind works and the addiction that being part of solving an impossible mystery brings.

I also used to joke in my pre-teen brain that Jonathan Creek was my third dad, because my father and he shared so many traits (up to and including t-shirt flannel shirt and oversized duffle coat fashion; inexplicably being invited to lots of parties despite being the creature who will sit in the corner, drink beer and possibly go through your bookshelves without speaking to anyone the whole time; good at crafts; wants to/does live in isolated/interesting places) and then the traits my dad didn’t share I do (analytical brain and autism-coding*)

So whilst the special effects (of which they tried to apply many) are really terrible in today's climate of CGI, and the situations sometimes require a bit of wilful suspension of disbelief, the Jonathan Creek series and especially the Christmas Specials, remain in my ultimate comfort box. Thank you for coming to my Ted Talk.

[themissingnumbers]

BRUH- Hi, this isn’t anything important. I just wanted to serve up another yappuccino with a side of theory real quick hope you don’t mind.

THIS MAN! HIM! Fire/Red’s expressions give me LIFE. Oh my JESUS- The talksprites are gorgeous and are very well done. You do such a good job at showing how he feels In subtle ways, like him glancing away and the furrowing of his eyebrows, that the bigger reactions seem visceral and really feel genuine. (As they say “OOC is serious business.”) (My favorite expression on him so far is the one where he gasped and started tearing up before remembering his friend. Just YANK on my heartstrings why don’t ya!?)

Also, ERROR Au79… Is that the homie Gold? Au79 is Gold on the periodic table, if my memory serves me correctly. I don’t know, but I trust him immediately. I believe the words of a dead man over anything else I’ve heard so far. Also, if it really is Gold—his spirit or whatever he may be now—I’m finna start crying bruh… Even in death he’s still looking out for his friend. That’s a good ass friend. He’s a real one for that. (Also, who TF is lying? Red? The Professor? I’m assuming Red because he keeps saying he doesn’t need stuff when he actually does. If nothing else he’s very clearly cold up there. That man needs help.)

And on the note of friends, Fire/Red’s reaction and subsequent denial to the offer of friendship didn’t seem to hold the air of an actual rejection (or maybe I’m reading the text in the wrong tone, who knows? I’m just going off of vibes~ or optimism who knows-) His “no”, to me, felt less like a full blown rejection and more of a “this is for your own good” type of thing. I feel like he wants friends, but I also get the feeling that he’s reluctant to get close to anybody and actively discourages anyone from climbing Mt. Silver because of what he’s been through. Like, he’s already lost one friend to the mountain and he can’t handle losing another. (Gold(?) seems to know that too.)

Anyways, that’s all for this time. Thank you for coming to my ted talk. You and your homies keep up the good work. I look forward to seeing more! :D

Referring to this point in the story.

[late-tothe-party-07]

Nerding out about Rise Movie

(Yes I am aware Im late. That's my whole brand. Shut.)

Anyway. This is specifically about the last bits cause of course it is.

*ahem *

Cant find a GIF but yknow that bit, when Leo tells Casey to basically pull the plug, to let him die, and the kid grabs the key to do so. But he doesnt do it right away and you can see the struggle so clearly its amazing.

Theres Casey knowing he will be the cause of losing Leo again, in such a short time. He doesnt want to. This is his father figure/uncle. This is one of the only comforts he knew and he has to be the one to kill it. And then there's resolve that its the right thing to do.

Its almost like Casey was trying to impersonate Future Leo, a person he looked up to, who made hard choices for the good of everyone.

But then the bravery is gone, crumbling at his feet and Casey doesnt want to make the hard choice. This is still a kid. This is still someone who a few hours earlier had watched his world die. Every last bit of it.

He doesn't even look when he finally does it. And he doesn't stay put and pull, he runs away.

-

The moment the portal shuts Leo stops fighting.

The moment his brothers are safe he just stops.

There is no brave front, no stoic decree that he will make the Kraang's life hell or take revenge somehow more than he has. He's done.

However almost everyone I see writing this bit in fanfics always makes it sound like he didn't care about dying and that isn't true. He wants to live. He's crying, wanting his family to hold him and be in the good times again so he holds onto the picture. But he's genuinely too tired to do much and he knows there's nothing he can do anyway. Doesn't mean he doesn't still want there to be.

Who says sacrifices arent scared of dying?

-

The fact the boys gave it everything they got and all the Kraang had to do was flick a finger. That is terrifying and such an awesome way to display the villain's power. They have no hope of defeating it, and its not hard to see how the Kraang took over the world in a different timeline. To have the turtles do all that and it to be brushed away as a little less than an inconvenience. Horrifying. Good job.

-

Call it talking about something obvious, but I love the scenes we see that we thought was the end, with Leo gone forever. Cause at that point the world was saved, people were probably celebrating if they could see it happening, but to our heroes there was no victory. To them the end is as devastating as if they had lost. The background behind Casey as he clutches Leo's sword is the same red he grew up with, where death and loss and fear was as common as air.

Donnie is crying, and he shakes his head as he realizes cause no, this cant be reality. This wasn't in his plans. He denies the tears because that means its hurting. And if it's hurting that means that it happened.

Raph is on the ground cause he is the big brother, meant to protect them, and he failed. The grief is piled on by guilt and anger and sorrow and the need to do something but he can't and its too heavy. Even he can't carry all of it.

-

Fun little tidbit to finish but I love how when Mikey opens a portal to get Leo back, Raph and Donnie also take some of the backlash to that power. Its also a little funny that its the two turtles who were dead when he opened the time gateway, especially since Ninpo is stronger when they are united as a family and he opened that portal alone.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk

[himebushou]

Alrighty — rolling onto the second episode of SK8 the Infinity!

When I first saw the subs, I thought, "Oh, the subbers are being cute. There's no way Reki actually uses the word 'gnarly'."

But I listened back and he... 100% does.

HE'S JUST SUCH A GREAT AND SUPPORTIVE CHARACTER.

I love sports anime. I love training montages. I love it when sports anime contain training montages. Thanks for coming to my TED Talk.

The first time I watched this scene, I was in utter shock. It... still doesn't really comput that Shadow is a literal florist, lol.

TIME FOR SOME HASEGAWA NANAKO APPRECIATION. I love her so much... the way she fusses over Langa here is so adorable, gosh.

And loooook — she's still wearing her wedding ring.

Honestly, these expressions —

Reki and Langa are such a good match.

All the details in this scene are just — wow! And I love Reki's house!

Reki said the thing, huehue.

Definitely one of my favourite moments. Just the way the pair of 'em are absorbed in their own worlds — but Langa's still paying enough attention to know when Reki wants some sauce. It's just great.

I love the colours in Sk8 and I love how it's obvious that the writers took skateboarding super seriously. Sports anime that do a decent job of informing their audiences about a sport are precious.

[lelu3]

I have ranked all the Ted Lasso episodes from my favorite to least favorite and wrote some of my thoughts on each one. Spoilers ahoy. Feel free to disagree and tell me I'm a moron in the notes, but don't fight with each other.

Rainbow--My favorite episode. Absolutely as good as the series gets. Highlights are Ted's unending positivity and the the romcom themes mapping surprisingly seamlessly onto this football office dramedy. Make Rebecca Great Again--The introduction of so many things I love about the series: focus on Ted's mental health, Sassy, Rebecca taking steps toward getting over Rupert, Hannah Waddingham's singing voice, Keeley and Roy. That final sequence is just a masterpiece. No Weddings and a Funeral--The THEMES, man. Juxtaposing Ted and Rebecca's relationships with each of their fathers. The team showing up to support Rebecca. Rupert being slimy. This episode has it all. So Long, Farewell--Admit it, you cried. I cried too. I have some quibbles with this one, but all in all it was the most satisfying ending we could have had Mom City--You know I like me some Ted and his mental health. The "thank you, fuck you" scene encapsulated kids relationships with their parents. This one is just very personal for me. Man City--This is such a wham episode. Roy hus Jamie and my heart explodes, Ted admits to Sharon that his father killed himself and my heart explodes again. I may be in the minority, but I also really liked Rebecca and Sam. Also, who doesn't love Roy and his interactions with Phoebe? Sunflowers--A series of isolated stories that really come together into something special. Highlights include Trent and Colin bonding over their sexuality, Jamie and Roy bonding in general, and the Flying Dutchman. Also holy shit, Ted actually successfully does his job for the first time. Two Aces--A nice, solid episode. Dani is a treasure. Beard's "WE SHOULD DO THIS PART OUTSIDE" makes me laugh every time. I've never disliked Rebecca more than in this episode (in a good way). Tan Lines--Ok, real talk, Ted's toxic positivity would be WAY too much for anyone, and it was really nice to see divorce as a necessary thing that can happen. Henry is adorable. Trent Crimm: The Independent--Trent is in my top 3 favorite characters in the series. In contrast to the previous episode, Ted's positivity is on full glorious display in this one. Watching him be slowly figure out Ted is genuine is a joy to see. Phoebe and Roy are adorable. (I Don't Want to Go to) Chelsea--Another Trent episode. I really like Roy coming to grips with his self-doubt and Trent realizing how much her hurt Roy. As much as I dislike them later, Shandy and Zava's introductions are actually pretty successful. Inverting the Pyramid of Success--Another solid episode. Watching Nate implode was heartbreaking, but seeing the team win was amazing. Nick Mohammed is a really amazing actor. Midnight Train to Royston--We're reaching the point of the series where all I have to say is "really solid episode". I liked Edwin Akufo in this one and I felt his blow up was actually really funny, as was Sam and Rebecca's conversation at the end where Sam is talking to "Ted". Beard After Hours--Yeah, I'm in the minory that liked this one. Beard's weird night fits his personality perfectly. I really liked how off-the-wall this one was. For the Children--Rupert's real introduction! Keeley breaking up with Jaime! Accountability matters! Ted seeing through Rupert's bullshit! What's not to like? Pilot--A nice, solid episode that sets up the plot as well as the series' themes. International Break--There are things I like in this one, like Rebecca's speech and Jaime wearing Sam's number and Nate FINALLY starting to take accountability, and "those children are dead, Rebecca", but it also has Edwin Akufo who was DEFINITELY never utilized well. The Hope that Kills You--Another really solid episode that foreshadows Nate's downfall. It's sad seeing the team lose, but the actual football match was well done. The Signal--Watching Roy rise to the challenge of being a coach is awesome and there are some small points I really like about this one, but I gotta be honest; I was never terribly invested in Jaime. Also the Beard/Higgins/Jane plot is weird and I get second-hand embarrassment from Rebecca's mom. The Diamond Dogs--The debut of the Diamond Dogs and the darts match can't really save this middling episode. It's ok. Higgins quitting and Keeley getting angry at Rebecca feels like set-up for something that didn't quite pay off as well as I wanted it to. Buiscuits--Another solid, middle of the road episode. This one suffers for not being particularly memorable, but it doesn't do anything particularly offensive, either. La Locker Room Aux Folles--As sweet as the locker room scene is, this one is brought down by Isaac making Colin's coming out about himself and Ted comparing being gay to being a Broncos fan. Also, I looked up the Broncos on my phone after this episode and now I keep getting notifications about them? I don't even watch football (any of them). No, putting a lampshade on the Broncos doesn't make it better. We'll Never Have Paris--I know a ton of people hated this one, but I kinda liked it. Ted being neurotic about Michelle and Jake felt natural to me and Beard's conversation with Henry made my heart melt. On the other hand, this series REALLY handled Jake poorly. The stuff with the leak brings it down, though. Do the Right-est Thing--This one is fine. Nora is fine. The Dubai Air thing is fine. This one just kinda suffers from being unremarkable. Carol of the Bells--Super sappy with just enough pathos that I don't mind. It sure is a Christmas episode. Lavender All Apologies--The confession scene sure is good. So is Roy and Keeley's scene in the locker room. Fun fact, a gif of Rebecca and Rupert's conversation in this one is what got me to watch the series. Other than that, it kind of feels like another one that isn't all that remarkable. Goodbye Earl--The dog dies. Ted is weird about therapy despite desperately needing some. The cartoon dream sequence was weird as hell. Another pretty middling one. Smells like Mean Spirit--Another pretty eh one. I wasn't crazy about Roy and Keeley breaking up. I don't remember too many funny moments in this one either. Headspace--Ted's story with Sharon just kind of frustrates me and I get a LOT of second-hand embarrassment from Roy and Keeley's deal. Signs--Hate it. Hate Shandy. Hate Rebecca visiting the fertility clinic because of the psychic. Hated Nate's date. Hated Zava and his pointlessness. Really fucking hated Jack. Big Week--The entire episode we're waiting for Nate to approach Ted and it never happens. Ted talking to Michelle at the end is not nearly enough for me to show that Ted is expressing his anger in a healthy way rather than repressing it. Rebecca dressing Rupert down was pretty good, though. 4-5-1--Hate it. Hate how no one is paying attention to Ted's obvious spiral. Hate the green matchbook and the psychic thing. Hate Dr. Jacob. Trent catching Colin and walking away to "Everybody Knows" is the one bright spot. The Strings that Bind Us--The worst one bar none. The red strings felt like a joke Roy would make that Ted and Beard would shut down because it's INSANE. Jamie potentially losing his dick was such a stupid, sophomoric joke. I hate Keeley and Jack and their whole deal. I don't give a shit about Jade. Sam vs. the bigotted Cabinet member felt like it could have been an ongoing thing, but it was dropped after one episode. The only bright spot is Ola, but he's not enough to save it.

[klobast]

My experience listening to Red Vox and Davy's Grey

+++++++++++++ PART 1: +++++++++++++

When I began to hear those few notes at the end of some songs…my brain exploded. I was like, no -- really? These WHOLE ALBUMS are connected? I mean, I've heard of the Gorillaz having just an album and an EP. But this was…wow!

+++++++++++++ PART 2: +++++++++++++

And then came THIS. So many albums and EPs combined. MAN! This kinda drove me crazy a bit. Each time I thought I had it, I just listened to the ending of another song and found that it matched up with the beginning of another one from a DIFFERENT ALBUM. All in all, it was very fun. I have to say Vinny, Mike, Joe, Jerrold, and Bill…this was a real treat, both to listen to and find out the story. 91 songs. Wow.

Thank you for this Red Vox. And thank you, dear reader, for looking through this.

+++++++++++++ PART3: +++++++++++++

You know, the more I rearrange this stuff and realize how the story has changed, it just makes me sadder than ever. But I don’t mind, I get that it’s just a story. But it I also realize it ends sorta happily too. I guess it’s really just a bit of a reminder that sometimes it just takes A WHILE before things get better, but they do.

The thing is, sometimes you have to work on yourself in order to make things better. I like that message. I can certainly relate to it now, as I want to do that. So’s to say, I’m glad to have a reminder that sometimes the fault is in myself.

I honestly think we all need that reminder sometimes.

Self-improvement is always important.

+++++++++++++ PART 4: +++++++++++++

C’mon. You know Red Vox has that thing where you like the songs more every time you listen to them. Gorillaz does that, too. Ya Gorillaz used to be my favourite band, but now it’s Red Vox.

I’ve never had as much fun putting together the story than I have with Red Vox. At first, I thought it was just, like, a normal story. Then there’s ghosts(/succubi, maybe?), aliens and Star Trek and people with like superpowers that can teleport you halfway across the galaxy (And possibly cause a garden to grow into a jungle?). And then you’re like -- OHHHH, yeah!

Also, it’s very human. Just like toiletkuns.

Anyways, thanks for coming to my ted-talk…

HAVE A VERY APPROVED DAY.

+++++++++++++ PART 5: +++++++++++++ I want to say thank you to Red Vox, again. Vinny, Mike, Joe and Bill… awesome job! Combing through the songs and stringing it all together has been my pleasure. It's nice to see something new and something so grand like this. A thing that loops back and around itself just to get the story.

Cool beans, dude.

I'll say it again, I've yet to meet something like this. Also, I've yet to meet an album that can be defined by one genre, and yet not at all. Western. With sprinkles of other stuff. I first started noticing it in Reno, but once I heard it there, I noticed it in every other song, too.

Realizing that was another treat! Like dangnabbit, talk about getting bang for your buck. Multiple listens in and I'm still getting something new out of it. Discoveries up the wazoo!

It's what hooked my to Gorillaz, and what made me think they were my favourite artist.

But the way Red Vox does it -- for me, they trump the Gorillaz now. Red Vox is my favourite band. I can listen to it when I feel down just to feel. And I can even listen to it for advice and motivation when I'm stuck and cant feel like I can keep going.

It's a dream come true.

Gorillaz I feel was more sad than ever truly motivational. Red Vox has it, though, and that's what keeps me around. It's what makes me listen through all of the albums over and over. Especially because… it's not always bad.

At times, it shows you that life isn't a forever burger of sorrow.

Even in the lowest lows, even when you're lost… you can still experience some good. The song Room to Breathe comes to mind. Sure, theres some heavy stuff, especially now considering my listening order.

But… still, theres GOOD stuff, too.

It's not all black and white. And I think that's a good reminder to have in life. That's why I love Red Vox.

+++++++++++++ PART 6: +++++++++++++

First off, thank you to the members of Davy's Grey for the great music!

Second off:

YOOO! I think Davy's Grey and Red Vox are connected. But that's just a theory. I could be wrong.

Here's my evidence:

Job in the City, from What Could Go Wrong, seems to be in the persepctive of a dad, I think. And this dad-dude talks about how he bought a car and a house when he was young.

Sh#t Hits the Fan, from No Cigar, mentions the protag having a four year old son and wife, for whom he just bought a car and a house!

But then again -- I hear you! Thats REALLY COMMON, right?

Well, if we take the song Envy and rearrange the words, we get the name VYNE.

VYNE and DAVY both have -VY- in them. I believe that's intentional.

Fade to Grey, when rearranged, becomes Davy Ergato. This means Beloved Worker. And that matches up with Davy's Grey, the album. Thus, Vyne is the son of Davy Ergato.

Etymology of Davy Ergato from Wiktionary: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Davy#English https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/David#English https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/ergato-#English

Now, if we put Vyne and Ergato together we get Vyne Ergato or Vine Worker.

Etymology of Vyne from Wiktionary: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/vyne#Middle_English

And this seems intentional when faced with my theory Lyanna.

In the song Lyanna, from Room to Breathe, we have the repeated -ight, in the words FIRELIGHT and TONIGHT. Ight sounds similar to Ide or Ida, which comes from Germanic, and means work. Lyanna is similar to Liana, which means a tropical type of vine.

Etymology of Liana and Ide from Wiktionary: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/liana#English https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Ide#English https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/Ida#English

And so, Lyanna Ide… or Vine work. Vinework is a word that refers to decorum that resembles vines.

Link to Wiktionary on the meaning of Vinework: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/vinework

Would it not be poetic if Vyne Ergato/Vine Worker fell in love with Lyanna Ide/Vine Work?

In other news, I think I also have the name for the girl Vyne dates and gets dumped by in highschool, then critizes afterward in just PART of the album What Could Go Wrong. Vyne seems to then later reconnect with this person around the age of 21 (Rub Your Eyes, from album Another Light, talks about Vyne getting into vice/addictions at Reno, Nevada. Burn A Picture, also from album Another Light, talks about alcohol bottles and drugs being on Vyne's floor. This suggests Vyne is at least 21, since that's legal age for those to drink in Nevada.) where she introduces drugging and drinking to Vyne, which gets him addicted and causes him to start losing his friendship with her due to those addictions. A few years after, Vyne tries to get a handle of his addictions and heal his relationships, causing him and this woman to begin dating again before Vyne breaks it off with her another time due to him not being able to keep up with her libido (Possibly due to her being a succubus. She also looms over his bed when he's sleeping sorta like a sleep paralysis demon.) before Vyne then gets back into a relationship with her again after seemingly being cursed with bad luck (Succubi are demons and demons can use curses, after all.) in album Blood Bagel.

During the song from Blood Bagel titled Between the Cheeks of Love, we get the lyrics between the Moons of Venus. During the song Cemetery Window, Vyne talks about a woman who only ever looked at him from the cemetery window. To me this seems to be the same woman who later died to a drug overdose during another part from album What Could Go Wrong -- particularly within songs She Missed the Beat, Ghost Page and Long Lonely Night. I can see myself associating a person who died can with a cemetery window. To me, it makes sense, is what I mean.

If we put Cemetery Window and Moons of Venus and rearrange them, maybe change the alter them a little, we can get the name Finestra Mound. Finestra is Italian for Window. Mound is short for Gravemound.

Link to Wiktionary on the meaning of Finestra: https://en.wiktionary.org/wiki/finestra#Italian

Basically Cemetery Window.

That's all I have for now.

Thank you.

And remember -- I could be wrong. This is just a theory.

[winderlylandchime]

WE ARE ON 3x07! 1/2 *pauses tv on Brian getting head and looks at me* ‘how awkward do you think this was to film? Like i know it’s a job but what if…he actually gets turned on?’ (This is the moment where I actually thought about telling him Gale is straight but went against it to not “ruin” the magic) *starts ep again* ‘oh shit, Ted is in deep shit isnt he? THIS IS BULLSHIT!’ *ethan pops up, he pauses the tv and smacks his head* ‘OH COME ON! There’s no escaping this fucker is there?! OH WAIT JUSTIN DIDNT TELL HIM HE SAW HIM? nevermind. i forgot Justin can drive. Why couldn’t he ever drive Brian’s car? WHY DIDNT HE TELL YOU? WHAT DID HE SEE? OH THOSE ARE THE WORDS OF A MAN TERRIFIED THAT HIS BULLSHIT ROMANTIC ACT IS GONNA BE EXPOSED! Oh he was a muuuusic student? bro be fucking for real. Justin sounds like HE is jealous? Dude. Bro. You’d have a stroke if someone mentioned Brian right now. (ethan says fans will think he’s sexy) Oh god, I’m actually afraid that if i roll my eyes one more time that theyll get stuck.‘ ‘FUCK YOU COP BOY! HE HAS A SON! Dude, Gus’ dad is literally every parents nightmare when it comes to role models. BRI WHY WOULD YOU BRING HIM TO LIBERTY! HE IS LITERALLY TALKING ABOUT YOUR FAVORITE PLACES! How can he not realize this is bad? I’m sorry but he isn’t dumb, so this is all bullshit. There is NOTHING to clean up at liberty. He’ll whip his ass? Oh he’s gay for sure’ ‘I think I should give Ted a lesson into how to talk to your mom on the phone. We have a lovely relationship! I tell her about my recovery and Brian and how Justin is stupid for leaving and she tells me to go fuck myself and then asks about my day and tells me she loves me. It’s perfect.’ ‘Sooo instead of talking to his boyfriend and being like either you stop drugging your tushy or im out, he’s making his best friends ex boyfriend draw him? Mike, be honest with me..where were you on the day when the good lord was giving away a brain that worked?’ ‘WHY ARE WE HYPING UP ETHAN? WE HATE ETHAN? Why did we never hype up Brian! HUH DEBBIE?’ Mel said shes not most women after she had a negative pregnancy test ‘you’re right, “most” women dont annoy me this much. And “most” women would go to the sperm bank instead of the best friend of the previous donor that they oh so hate’ ‘BRIAN! God i hate that car. OH TEDDY! (brian says hed sue if he was ted bc of the photo) Remember when he said he’s gonna sue that guy for saying he’s 31? That was funny. And a better time. Lets go back to the coupley brian and justin. I miss that. BRIAN WHAT THE FUCK?! TED IS YOUR FRIEND! WHAT IS GOING ON? Tell me how did he plan on driving with snow all over his peanut car?’ ‘DAPHNEE i love her! DID YOU SEE THAT FACE! SHE HATES THAT KAZOO FUCKER JUST AS MUCH AS I DO! COMES FROM LIVING WITH BRIAN?! FUCK YOU JUSTIN! Bri didnt cheat! He wasnt sneaking around. You knew cause he told you. How are you gonna blame him for that? THANK YOU DAPHNE HE WAS HONEST! I knew you and i would get along! Now give me Jen and Daphne and Brian together! Oh my god Justin, who are you trying to convince that you love him and arent worried he cheated? Me or you?’ ‘BRIAN! It’s my boy Brian! Working on a homophobes commercial. This is pure bullshit! He would never. EMMETT AND BRI BRI! Why is Brian suddenly such a horrible friend to them? What is going on? This isn’t normal? THATS RIGHT EMY TELL HIM! He DOES care about his friends even if he acts like he doesn’t. I feel like Emmett is the only one who can kinda scare Brian. Bri Bri, this is bullshit why are you doing this to me? He’s just a little lost because of Justin. I’m sure of it, right? *looks at me all scared*’ Stockwell and Brian are currently in a steam room ‘oh this is the first hetero steam room he’s been in, huh? exactly Brian! Help Ted! Oh this dude is for sure gay. WHY DOES IT ALWAYS GIVE ME ETHAN AFTER BRIAN?!’ HE THEN PAUSED THE TV TO GO ON A SMOKE AND I WAS ACTUALLY ANGRY BC THEE SCENE IS UP!!!

I feel like Emmett is the only one who can kinda scare Brian. <- YEP

I am just going to present this without comment because my comments are all "yes" and "right on" and "exactly."

[invisiblegarters]

Dangerous Romance Ep 5

When last we watched, Sailom failed to tutor Kang into passing all of his classes and so he was fired. Everyone was very sad and acted like one of them had gone away to war and they would never be able to speak again rather than, you know, just talking to each other.

Sailom dabbled in escorting and the top of Kang's head almost came off, Pim saved the day but Kang couldn't have that, o no, so he got Best Grandma to rehire Sailom and BG, seeing the writing on the wall (or the crush all over her grandson's face, more like), decided that the only way that Sailom could efficiently tutor Kang was to move in. Let the cohabitation hijinks commence!

Kang, acting like it matters: Why does Sailom have to live here?

Pfft literally no one buys this act you're badly putting on.

Oh my god look at these weirdos. You know I have never flung myself on a bed that way before. Usually when I'm exhausted or a bed is super comfy I just throw myself on it face first, lol.

I love that Kang is a clothes horse.

Also we're about to see some spoiled brat again, looks like. Good.

And Dad appears to tell Sailom not to push Kang.

Oop Sailom is in the bathroom Kang's about to show up. Because he already said that Sailom's bathroom time will is going to be both of their bathroom times.

LOL guess Kang meant he planned to shower in front of Sailom rather than the reverse. Bet he still manages to show up during that time.

Kang you are fooling no one playing naked chicken. What in the Ayan shit is this?

With how fast this drama is moving through the progression of this relationship, I expect these two will be sharing a bed by the end of the episode. Mark my words!

This feels very Never Let Me Go. Except in this case there's no daddy "nope my son will take the bus lest he get the idea that he's on your level" to ruin things.

Oh I love Pim. She's such a sweetie.

Aw that awkward moment when you remember high school politics. I mean there are other factors as well but that felt very high school to me.

JUNE. HI. Oh I guess there will not be a GL in this one then huh. Since they probably won't do student/teacher.

Oh no. This would be the worst. I don't know how it is in Thailand but I know people in my highschool used to be really awful to some of the teachers. Some real bully shit.

Perth's hair is so nice.

Pfft did I read somewhere that in Thailand acting is the purview of rich kids unless you want to work two jobs or was that a fever dream? How meta.

Hahaha oh here we go. Except I forgot that Sailom is a little punk. I love him so much, guys. I do.

Oh no is Sailom trying to look good for Kang or for Pim?

My best is Kang. I think Sailom is well aware he has a crush. Kang maybe not so much.

Yeah it's totally for Kang. Oh, honey.

Kang babe I am sorry but Pim just isn't that into you. I could be wrong I guess but View is definitely not playing it like she is.

I would totally hold the lizard. I love reptiles.

Aw now he's all embarrassed.

Am I sensing a return to the escorting to help pay for college plot? Because I still want more of that.

And yes, I agree with Miss Napdao. Although I get why Sailom might feel that he has to continue his tutoring efforts, but I will say that if it's mostly about wanting to be around Kang Sailom should rethink. I am a firm believer in never putting your plans aside because of romantic feelings. Work for yourself first because nine times out of ten, you're the only one who will.

Thank you for coming to my TED talk. I have no romance in my soul.

I love the ominous music that goes with these two. Like they aren't flirting.

I love the seniors. "Look you two can fight after sports day alright? Just suck it up for now you little shits."

Is that not how it went?

Oh man Sailom's practical reason for choosing Engineering hits a little too close to home.

Uh, Kang. What if he can't actually sing? Just because it was a dream doesn't mean he can actually do the thing, you know. Did we learn nothing from the lizard poop incident.

Also why. In every Thai drama. Why. WHY.

...well at least they didn't make us listen to them sing the entire song raw. Could have been worse. Could have been Sand no I'm not sorry.

Kang. I'm sorry but Pim is 1000% not into you.

SAILOM? Really???

Really? Show. Show. What are you doing. Although I guess it would be a good way to smack some sense into Kang regarding his own feelings - my guess is at some point he's gonna realize he's less upset about Pim liking Sailom than he is about Pim liking Sailom. Hopefully he acts like a complete moron about it because that's fun for me.

Lol okay I have to admit I like these little ads. They're more fun than the usual.

Next week: Sailom's little broken hearted self withdraws. Good for you dude that's what I'd do to. It'll only last five minutes but you know. At least you're not being set up to continuously return to a dude that keeps hurting you, unknowingly or not. Sand.

Yes I'm going to be mad about that forever.

Cute ep, and I promised myself that I would turn my brain off about the easy forgiving of the bullying, so once I did that I enjoyed myself much much more. I'm still hoping that the show actually plans to delve into the more serious topics it keeps flirting with, but even if it doesn't I'm not having a bad time. I do think that Perth and Chimon could handle more, though. Why cast two such strong actors if you're just going to give them work anyone could do?

[placidsloth]

things customers have said to me

im actually done collecting pokemon cards, shoes are kinda like my passion now. plus id rather drive my car down to florida full of shoes rather than my pokemon cards (its two binders dude its literally smaller than one shoebox)

get anything new in? (greg you were here yesterday, nothing has changed)

do you have this comic book store specific cover variant of this comic that came out today? i know its not this comic book shop, but i figured you might still have it (we're a very small store ha ha... that means no)

could you get me this 20 year old comic? your distributor should have it right?

yeah this comic has an important first appearance in it, i'm surprised you guys have any copies left. (yes because avengers #58 or whatever that came out 3 weeks before is such an important issue, thats why we only ordered one and sold none)

do you even know who damian wayne is? you know dick grayson isn't robin anymore, right?

do you sell manga? (sir this is a comic book store, any manga we have is entirely an accident)

you know, they use anti-depressants to keep sexual deviants and sociopaths like ted bundy from wanting to have sex while in jail, i dont understand why they dont just give everyone anti-depressants because literally every person is a little bit of a sociopath. i think putting anti-depressants in the water supply would probably reduce the number of jackasses in the world (terrifying thanks)

i thought that guy was gonna come at you when you said your boss was going to come talk to him about his order lol. i work with cops a lot and he reminded me of a junky looking to score a hit. but you handled that really well! good job! (way to make me feel safe dude)

no but the bionicle comic was one of the top selling comics of the year when it came out (somehow im not so sure about that.)

i wish there was a comic with like the members of the batfam you don't get to see usually (well actually there's an ongoing batgirls title, and tim drake has a mini-series-) no but like a good one, you know? (-.-)

how am i supposed to know what comic this is? (did you try looking at the back? it should have the name there) yeah it wasnt there (are you sure? flip it over for me?) okay i swear that wasnt there before

oh wow why is this comic so expensive? why would anyone pay $500 for a comic they cant even read? (i ask myself that every day)

damn i thought that guy was gonna lose it at you when you said you didn't have that item haha

nah man i just want venom stuff. i like to think of myself as the anti-hero of my life (i had to drop my stapler and lean down to pick it up so they wouldnt see me laugh at them)

wow, in the time ive been here, youve gotten hit on by three different guys! does that happen a lot? (i do not remember being hit on, i remember helping customers and chatting with them?)

so you're like 16 right? how long have you been working here? (4 years... i'm 23...)

oh i wasnt expecting to see a girl working here! are you the owners daughter/girlfriend/wife? (no thank god)

man if only my mom/wife/girlfriend/mother-in-law didnt give away/get rid of/lose/burn/throw out my comics/pokemon cards/magic cards i could be a millionaire right now (x to doubt)

[raindownforme]

Hey! I’m back with another request!

Reader and Ted practicality have all the same classes and whenever they have to do projects or work in pairs Ted without fail or shame is always like “Can she work with me! Please!” Even in front of the class So he can flirt with her during the project

She/her pronouns pls :D

Also I LOVED ORBITING JUPITER I NEVER HEAR ANYONE TALK ABOUT IT

An Ode to You

Ted Nivison x reader [she/her used]

The teacher, Mrs. Statham, smacked a stack of papers on her rolling cart. She lined the edges of them up to make it straight, then held the stack in her off arm. She turned to face the class, smiling kindly as she stood tall in her professional shoes.

“This week, we’re starting a project. You and a partner will be writing poetry based on prompts and discussing your different styles of writing. Your partner will be randomly assigned-“ the class groaned, some shutting books in protest. “Hey. It’s 9am, you think I want this either?” The class grew quiet. “Exactly. Now, I’m pulling names from a hat. First is…”

y/n leaned into her open palm, closing her eyes for a moment. She could hear students shuffling around their chairs, tennis ball covered legs scraping the cheap cement. She ran a hand through her hair, leaning back to stretch her back over the cheap school chair.

“YES.” Someone stood quickly in the opposite corner of the room, the scraping and falling sound of the chair making y/n jump. She opened her eyes to see her classmate Ted standing up in the corner with his arms upright in a cheering motion. He smiled widely, looking over towards y/n. He quickly realized his outburst, dropping his arms and pushing his glasses further onto his face. “Should I pick up that chair?”

“Yes, Ted. Then go move over to your partner.” Mrs. Statham shook her head, going back to the task she’d been working on before hand. Ted gathered his things, placing the chair back to where it belonged, and headed across the classroom to where y/n sat. He pulled the chair next to her out and sat down, smiling widely.

“Hey, come here often?”

y/n rolled her eyes, trying to hide a small smile. “Good morning Ted.”

“Good morning gorgeous.” Ted looked away from y/n, sorting through his backpack for a spiral notebook and a mechanical pencil. He turned back to y/n, intending to say something, but Mrs. Statham spoke first.

“All partners have been assigned. On the board are types of poetry and some one-word prompts. Yes you and your partner must pick the same type of poem and prompt. If you have any questions, I’ll be up here grading. Go ahead.”

The students began chattering as Mrs. Statham went to her desk. y/n huffed, staring at the board. She wasn’t well-versed on types of poetry, and the list was quite long.

“How about an Ode? You know like an Ode to something?” Ted gestured with his pencil as he talked. “I’ll let you pick the category.”

“An Ode to…” y/n scanned the board, looking for the right word. “Does that say darling?”

“No?” Ted squinted as he looked at the board as well. “I think it says daring. But I like darling! An ode to darling.”

y/n smiled, turning to begin writing in her own notebook. The rest of the lesson went on with only a few scattered comments from Ted.

“What color are your eyes?”

y/n looked up at him, confused. “Why?”

“Never mind I got it.” Ted furiously scratched at his paper, y/n returning to her own.

“What season is your favorite would you say?”

“Fall.” y/n set down her pencil, smiling kindly at Ted. “I like the leaves and it’s usually a nice temperature out. You?”

“I’m a late spring early summer kind of guy.” Ted taped his pencil over and over in a slow rhythm he could only hear in his head. “I mean, unless you have a pollen allergy.”

“Why?”

“I can’t take you out if you’ll be sneezing and coughing the whole time. I don’t know, maybe the fall could be a good time.” Ted waved like he was getting rid of an idea. “I’ll figure it out.”

“Okay?” y/n thought to herself for a moment, then ignored Ted’s question to go back to her work.

“Hey what’s your-“ Ted was cut short by the ringing of the school bell. He groaned dramatically as y/n stood to gather her things. “No! Stop.”

“Why?” y/n didn’t stop, instead zipping her bag shut and throwing it over her shoulder. Ted grabbed onto the edge of her shirt, tugging slightly.

“I don’t want you to go.”

“Ted, I have a class across the school. I’ll see you tomorrow.” y/n gently pulled her shirt from Ted’s grasp. He sighed, standing up.

“Fine. Let me walk you there at least?”

It took Ted all of a minute to gather his things. He shouldered his back pack and led y/n out of the classroom. He let his hand fall to his side, gently taking y/n’s middle finger and wrapping his own finger around it. He looked down at her, smiling softly, and held on tighter when she showed no sign of discomfort.

The two walked in silence across the school, taking y/n to her science class. Ted stopped her before she walked in, keeping her finger is his grasp. “Can I see you later?”

“Ted, we have class tomorrow. I’ll see you then.” y/n patted him in the arm, politely excusing her self. She watched him walk backwards down the hall, and turned to walk into the class.

“I’ll be thinking of you!” She rolled her eyes at Ted’s outburst, avoiding the peering eyes of her classmates.

———

The next few days continued the same way; Ted endlessly flirting while y/n write her ode. The writing came easy to her. She wrote about the stars, about the constellations and the night sky. It was a basic topic she knew, but it was easy to write about and it fit the prompt. She wasn’t sure what Ted had written about, but by now everyone had finished their poems, and it was time to present.

“Alright, Ted and y/n?” Mrs. Statham sat behind her desk, yawning into her mug of tea. “Please state your type and prompt.”

“We chose an Ode, and I miss read the prompt so instead of daring we chose darling?”

She nodded, keeping her eyes on the grading sheet in front of her. “I like it. Go ahead.”

y/n cleared her throat. She looked over at Ted, waiting to see who would go first. He gestured to her, offering her to go first while smiling kindly. Oddly enough, for it being the first class of the day, Ted seemed to be the most awake in the classroom.

“For darkness around you, a pattern to make do…” y/n read robotically from the sheet of paper in front of her. The poem lasted only ten seconds, letting her quickly set it aside and awkwardly smile at her classmates. There was light clapping from the crowd, complimentary almost.

“Very good.” Mrs. Statham scribbled on the grading sheet with a blue pen. “And what was that called again?”

“An Ode to the Stars.”

“Thank you. Ted you’re next?”

Ted nodded eagerly, straightening himself. He smoothed down the front of his shirt and looked expectantly at Mrs. Statham. “Do I-“

“There are no extra credit points for memorization. However, if you’d like to, go ahead.”

“Thank you.” Ted turned back to y/n, smiling widely. “I’m encaptured in your loving stare; My darling girl, my lady, fair.”

Ted went on for a long minute, leaving y/n a flustered mess. Every stanza, Ted found a new way to look at her. A new way to gesture to her. A new way to emphasize the lines he spoke. And after that long minute, the class fell silent for a moment before clapping loudly for Ted’s display.

“Thank you both. Class, did we notice any differences in Ted and y/n’s writing?”

Someone y/n didn’t know the name of put their hand upwards, prompting Mrs. Statham to call on them. “Well, y/n wrote about an object, Ted wrote about a person.”

“Good. Is there anything else we can infer class?”

“Oh!” Someone in the back classroom sat up straighter as they shouted out. y/n couldn’t quite see who it was. “y/n wrote kind of factual? Like things that we could all see. But Ted sees the person differently than we’d normally… perceive them?”

“Yeah. Exactly. Alright good job you two, go ahead and take your seats.”

Ted followed y/n to the shared desk in the far corner of the classroom. Another set of students went up to present theirs, and y/n kept her eyes glued forward on the pair, avoiding looking at Ted.

“I really liked yours.” Ted leaned over to whisper in her ear. She jumped a bit, surprised by how close he sat. “I think it was beautiful.”

“Thanks.” y/n chewed at the inside of her lip. “What was yours called again?”

“An Ode to You.”

“Sorry?” y/n tried to swallow the heat rising to her face, trying to not be flustered in front of Ted.

“It’s called An Ode to You.”

“To me?”

“No— well.” Ted twirled a pencil around in his finger tips. “It’s called An Ode to You, not like An Ode to y/n, I mean technically it is about you-“

“Me? What, are you flirting?”

Someone snorted in the seat in front of y/n and Ted. “You just noticed?”

y/n watched Ted’s face turn bright red. “I mean, they’re right. You just noticed?”

“I assumed it was a joke.”

“Why would I be joking?” Ted looked at y/n with concern etched across his face.

“I don’t know! Are you not joking?”

“No.” Ted very gently took y/n’s hand in his. “y/n, my darling. I would never joke about you.”

“Well Ted, honey, it’s 9am and you’re flirting with a tired teenager.”

“Can I flirt with you some other time?”

“Yes.” y/n yawned, stretching her arms upwards. “Any other time.”

“Tonight then? 7 o’clock?”

“Why 7-?” y/n stopped, her face becoming increasingly heated as the realization came to her. “A date? You want to take me on a date?”

The school bell rang and Ted stood from the desk, placing a folded piece of paper in front of y/n. “Text me, I’ll come pick you up.”

She watched Ted walk away, then looked down at the paper. On it read a phone a number that she assumed belonged to ted. When she unfolded it, however, was a hand written poem with a title reading, An Ode to y/n.