#how do i gain the motivation to WANT to exist and WANT others to know that i exist without the fear of rejection eating me alive
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the way everyone has a dislike in their profile that actually says something integral about their character. lu guang doesn't like plans getting messed up, cheng xiaoshi dislikes loneliness, xia fei with owing favors, vein with lying...
and then you have liu xiao, who dislikes... cilantro. and fish mint.
(shakes fist) (putting him in a glass jar and shaking vigorously) learn to be vulnerable!! tell me something about yourself!! I guess him liking movies lines up with the theater metaphors, and there's him liking chess, but that. doesn't count methinks
#mine musings#liveblogging link click#link click#okay the metaphor thing works out a little bit in that. it's on brand#70% of what we know about liu xiao are implicitly gained from other characters#e.g. how xf and ltc relate to him. how the liu family talk about him. how he thematically juxtaposes other characters like lg and cxs#the 30% are the things we know explicitly from him e.g. he's a rich kid with a sports car. he can hear heartbeats#he wants to merge the parallel lines or whatever#the rest are inferences like. oh okay no parallel lines? he doesn't like uncertainties i guess#the way he talks about friendship with xf and ltc? he values a transactional view of relationships#(maybe because transactions imply a certain level of certainty?)#he's the current favored child of the liu family but he wasn't before#he's a âmanipulatorâ but really that's mostly from marketing stuff and implications from canon#like. we know a lot about him but at the same time we don't#the way we just know his uncertainty -> certainty thing contrasts with lg's certainty -> uncertainty thing#we know his heartbeat hearing implies he knows everyone's level of sincerity and both xf and cxs exist as foils to that#the hunter thing with ltc. why does he believe that?#lots of âbringing the darknessâ lines in three of his songs for some reason#so like. i can't say that the show hasn't told us anything. they have but in circular ways#we don't know much about him from him directly but we do. know stuff. kinda. do you get me#all i want from YE6 is veinxiao friendship being shown so i can have new dimensions on how lx views friendship#and maybe like. a hint at what his motivations are. like why is he Like That#<- again funnier if he's just Like That from the womb. even if the liu family isn't fucked up he's still Like That#but that's not this show's style so probably not#lx notes#like the INSISTENCE of writing lx as a point of comparison or through other people's perspectives and very rarely from his own#is fascinating to me
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mannnnnnnn. i think not being taught how to be a person while also not being treated like one growing up did something to me
#what do u mean parents are supposed to help u work thru ur emotions instead of reprimanding u for feeling in the first place#what do u mean ive devoted my life to never feeling anything too strongly or even at all out of fear that id be hated for it#and the consequence of that denial of emotions has led me to not feeling like a person at all most days#my existence feels the same as a thought. intangible and only ever known to others if i speak it out#how do i gain the motivation to WANT to exist and WANT others to know that i exist without the fear of rejection eating me alive#how do i get in touch with my emotions and let myslef actually feel and process them without burning myself at the same time#i dont want to be a person but i do but i dont. but i HAVE to if im going to make it#sigh. i need my own space to figure out who exactly i am and what i want to give to this world#if i just keep giving myself to others without taking myself into considerstion i dont think ill have anything to give to myself after
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A final letter

Hello Everyone!
The queue is paused and everything is scheduled, which means we are ready for the finale!
I know that, in the end, this was just a silly side project for me, with everything else going on in my life. But for this occasion, I wanted to drop some words here and hope they make sense.
I started watching LMK only because a friend told me there was a "Sonadow-coded" ship. I ended up consuming the entire thing in one sitting on July 10th, 2024. At the time, I was still recovering from a bike accident that had left me with a broken right forearmâunable to draw for a little over a month. (I did try drawing with my left finger, but it wasn't exactly fun.)
Not only that, but it was summer, and I couldnât enjoy the season or practice my main sport, windsurfing. To say I was feeling the blues is an understatement. I remember being in physical pain just from not being able to draw my sillies. But then, watching LMK did something to my brain chemistry that my little undiagnosed autistic self had never experienced before. It hit so hard that Iâve been physically unable to rewatch the show SINCE that very first day. (And yâall still call me the CEO of this fandom. Bro, I just work here.)
A lot of you have asked what inspired me to start this comic or to draw LMK fan art in the first place. While my usual answer is, "I saw Shadowpeach and thought MK could be their lovechild, given his appearance," the moment that actually started it all was THIS ONEâ
(I HAD TO REWATCH THIS SCENE TO MAKE THE GIF AND IT HURT ME ON A MOLECOLAR LEVEL)
I have⊠a thing for characters who discover their entire identity was something else all along. It consumes my thoughts, my dreams, my every waking moment. I live for identity crises, for characters who thought they knew who they were, only to be forced to rediscover themselves, their existence, and their place in the world. If you give me a story where a character has to go through that, I will like itâregardless of how bad the rest of the story is.
Pair that with loads of trauma, daddy issues, the pressure of a legacy, and world-ending stakes, and congrats! Now Iâm obsessed, and I will not stop thinking about it for the rest of my days!
At first, my brain just wanted to release some of that energy with a small, four-panel post about the monkeys discovering that MK was technically their kid.
That was supposed to be it.
But since I never seem to learn my lesson, it didnât stay like that. Because once I started drawing, I just... continued.
And
I
never
stopped.
A lot of you have also asked how I found the motivation to draw so much, to never take a break. Well, Iâve said it before, and Iâll say it one last time: I am my number one fan. No matter how much you laughed, cried, screamed, or went feral over this story, I did all of that and more. Because I got to think about the chapters months before they released. I got to daydream about them. I got to watch them come to lifeâfirst through sketches, then line art, then dialogue. And finally, I got to witness your reactions and see the incredible creations you made, inspired by my story.
So yeah, in a way, it was almost an addiction. A good addiction. Because, for the first time in my life, I actually understood what loving art means.
Iâve been drawing for ten years, working professionally for five, but I never loved art before. I just liked it because I happened to be good at it. But creating this comic made me understand why artists say, "Oh, Iâve loved drawing since I was a child!" This was the first time I allowed myself to create purely for my own enjoyment. Something I hadnât had the privilege to do for a long time.
Other than making me feel even more single than I already was, this story somehow also helped me a little with my own family relationships. So yeah. Crazy how the gay monkeys changed my life.
Of course, I never could have predicted how much traction my AU would gain. Man, yâall were really starving to latch onto something this silly. /j
But yeahâthank you. Thank you for sticking around until the end, for having the patience and trust to follow the story even when I made you rage with angst and cliffhangers. (The statement in my bio still stands: I am not responsible for any physical or emotional damage my art has caused.)
Iâm absolutely shit at thanking people, or at writing, or at talking in general, honestly. Iâm the furthest thing from being good with words, so I hope the final chapter will be enough to show you my gratitude.
Through this story, I met so many wonderful, talented people. I watched as fans across different platforms found each other through memes and fanart of the AU. I saw artists start their own AUs inspired by mine, growing their own communities. I witnessed an explosion of creativity and collaboration through our takeovers. And I laughed along with you all.
And yeahâat its core, this story has always been about love. Whether itâs platonic, sibling, parental, romantic, or whatever the hell Mac and Wukong had going on for millennia.
At its heart, itâs a story about family.
And maybe, in the end⊠the real family wasnât just the one in the comic, but the one weâve found together along the way. đ
See you all at the finale.
Love you all, freaks /affectionate
Jade
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hello!! idk if you accept requests, but i randomly thought of octavinelle trio with a reader who's also from the sea like them and on land they're a total sweetheart, upbeat and doesn't give off the vibe of scariness at all, but the trio know that they're actually pretty scary! Cuz back in the sea they were an orca or something (like. sweet but theyre actually scary is my vision) if the octotrio is too much then is just floyd ok?? Sorry for yapping too much AHHH ur work is so great ty for writing so much đđ
THE DEVIL IN DISGUISE

âćœĄ in which youâre scarier than you seem
word counter: 180 per character
octavinelle boys x gn!reader
warnings: possible ooc, light bullying? (jade & floyd)
a/n: i love these boys, but theyâre all pricks. lovable pricks. on another note, i think iâm going to officially open requests. i have a few that iâm working on and iâve been having a lot of fun with them. theyâre also nice for when it gets busy and I donât have a lot of time to brainstorm ideas to write myself. anyway, i hope you enjoy :>
floyd leech
He thinks you are the CUTEST thing in existence. You're so fun! So squeezable! Floyd thinks that your switch in personality from land to sea only adds to how adorable you are. He is fully aware of your scary side, yet it only motivates him to tease and mock you more. On land, he'll try to sneak up behind you in the hallways. If you don't catch this man? He's picking you up, squeezing you, and twirling you around. Azul has told him to stop several times. Jade just wants to see you snap at Floyd, so he never interferes. If you do catch and stop him? He's pouting for the rest of the day while plotting his revenge. Everyone's going to assume Floyd's just picking on the helpless classmate who's too nice to do anything back. But he knows it's a facade. Which is exactly why he goes harder on you than anyone else. Riddle is PRAYING for you.
jade leech
You and him are similar in a way. Except he hides his true nature less well. Jade is quick to catch on and finds it extremely amusing. He wants to see how far this act of yours will hold up, meaning he's purposely putting you in situations that'd aggravate you. All while he wears an innocent smile. He takes up the role of a devil on your shoulder in a way. Jade is constantly trying to tempt you into revealing more and more of your scary side in front of others. Calling him out on this won't do you much good either since he's playing a similar game to you. He'll just give you that dashing smile of his and claim he has no idea what you're referring to. If you get caught up in trouble with other students, run out of your land potion way too quickly, get involved in an argument, etc, more often than not you'll find Jade somewhere nearby smiling at you. And something about that grin tells you he defiantly pulled some strings to make your life just a little bit harder.
azul ashengrotto
He's the only one out of the three who's slightly intimidated by you. But even then, it's less fear and more intrigue. Azul wants to pick your brain. Do you switch from sweet to scary on purpose? If so, why? What're you trying to gain from doing so? He'll do little things to let you know that he's well aware of your true nature. It won't be anything drastic like Jade, just little, snide comments here and there with a smug look. Azul has offered you so many job opportunities at the Monstro Lounge. A personality like yours is way too good for business. He actually holds you to a pretty high regard and isn't afraid to tell you that, calling you his 'star pupil' when you work for him. Azul tries to be close to you a lot. Is he plotting to make a deal with you? Most likely. He's trying to get your guard down so you're more likely to agree to whatever he wants to do with you. Your unique personality could be a great Joker card if he ever needs it.
#twisted wonderland x reader#twst x reader#twisted wonderland x you#twst x yuu#twst x you#floyd leech x reader#jade leech x reader#azul ashengrotto x reader#floyd leech x yuu#jade leech x yuu#azul ashengrotto x yuu#floyd x reader#jade x reader#azul x reader
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LILITH ASPECTS(deep dive)

i see somewhere that people who are lilith dominant have trauma when it comes to being accused of things
and itâs really true depending on what itâs aspecting it can show where things like this take place
mars-lilith in men or women can show accusation when it comes sex or doing things society deem as immoral like stealing from somebody
you could b doing literally nothing and someone will project that lilith on you and make you villain no matter how nice your being
you could be a virgin and someone would assume your a slut
these projections donât come from nowhere though sometimes the mars lilith people are like this
some can do whatever they want and not care about consequences, stealing, having sex with others partners etc
this mostly happens because these things happened to them, since this happened to them they want to gain a sense of control by doing it back to other people
when they were younger they were most likely a wild child but the people around them thought it was too much so they had to get forced to suppress that side of them
repressing their sexuality, getting in trouble for exploring their sexuality or being open about it especially early on
these people can b drawn to taboo sexual experiences and taboo things, if someone tell them not to do something theyâre most likely going to do it
because they donât like people threatening their independence in any way(mostly with the hard aspects)
no matter how bad something may seem to society they donât care they just care about what they want to do not what people want them to do they want donât want to conform to others expectations
may either b too honest about their motivations that it comes off as too much or they keep everything inside( i see this mostly with mars opposite lilith)
mars opposite lilith tend to make the person scared to be lilith they can come off as reserved when it comes to mars things but internally they can be lilith
it can go the other way too that they identify more with lilith that people are scared by it
mars trine lilith tend to be the ones who donât care and will express their desire and go after what they want without anything holding them back because theyâre comfortable with lilith not fighting it
venus lilith aspects are very interesting especially for women
people with these can have people admire them and want them but never get approached like at all
when they do get approached or or people get a attracted to them it can be very creepy people
you could be a minor and older men or women can hit on you and even try to get with you
these people can criticized for literally anything when it comes to their appearance
they can be so magnetic and attractive to others that other put them down and humble them for literally existing
people who are attracted to you can hate you for how you make them feel it can make them feel out of control and that you have control over them
most of the time the people who are in your face hating are the ones wanting to be like you or want you
you attract love hate relationships
i see men with this aspect who wants a girl who is open sexually and very wild but then gets mad at them for being like that at the same times(with hard aspects)
they tend to want questionable people like other people can be very bewildered by the people you want
men from my experience tend to want girl who are hoes and everyone knows but they still feel drawn to them because theyâre free and wild with the easy aspects they may be more ok with it but with the hard aspects they definitely hate their type
they want that but when they get it they get conflicted
women with this can be seen as a bad bitch or be intimidating to men and other women because their confidence in their femininity
women with this tend to post revealing picture of themselves and have no shame and donât care
or it can be the complete opposite and want to no skin showing whatsoever because of trauma
people with this can get accused of stealing others partner or wanting others partners
this can be the case some of the time they could get intrigued by things that are forbidden and they arenât supposed to be desiring
men with this i see tend to have a fixation on taking other menâs girls or taking pride in it
they can b too independent where they donât even need their partner no matter how much they love them
can tell themselves that they donât need others love and that self love is the only thing that matters
partners and people attracted to them being jealous and wanting to tame them
people being attracted to you while theyâre in a relationship
something i seen was a man with Venus trine lilith and his partner whoâs a venus square lilith and when he met her she was already posting these revealing pictures of herself on insta and he still wanted her but when they got into a relationship she continued to do this and he eventually got a problem with it even though he was attracted to that at first
mercury-lilith aspects are very interesting these people donât sugarcoat for anything at all they always tell the brutal truth
no matter how much it hurts other people
before those people even open their mouth they can be shut off because their words have so much power
people can twist their words and accuse them of saying things they never said
couldâve exiled or got in trouble for speaking their mind
trauma around speaking their mind, which can make them always speak their mind or wanting to always be silent and keep it to themselves
these people can be very smart because they look for everything not just things that are nice and pleasant
will look for truth no matter how much pain it causes them
shame around communication overthinking whether they should say something or to just let go and say what comes natural to them
the easy aspects tend to have no problem speaking their mind no matter the circumstances
the hard aspects have problems and conflict with that and need to learn they shouldnât be ashamed of anything they say because their words are powerful and cause change
communication style can be intimidating because theyâre always challenging others ideas
refusing to be silenced
mercury-lilith hard aspects tend to cuss a lot and not like that about themselves but they continue to do so
people not wanting to talk to you because of your communication style and you might realize why people are acting weird towards you but itâs because they canât handle the energy and think itâs too much
sun-lilith
you couldâve expressed yourself and people told you that your annoying or too much
this caused you to stop expressing yourself
or to over express yourself that itâs too much for people
you could be yourself and people think your mean or that you donât like them
always trying to rebel against things people are doing
you can be very unique because you refuse to be like the crowd
this can cause you ti be outcasted and isolated
you prefer that compress ti being something your not in fitting in
these people can be way too authentic for others they can have no shame which is good thing but when your fully authentic people are going to hate you or love you which is at at play here
hard aspects could have trouble with their natural sexual identity if they donât accept that about themselves other people will project that onto them
people would project bad things onto you if your not acting as lilith when itâs in opposition
people can make you the villain no matter what you do
it can make you just be ok with being the villain because thatâs all people wanted to make you so itâs no escaping
(donât have much experience with the asc and moon aspects)
THANKS FOR READING
â€ïžđ€đ€
#astro community#astro notes#astro observations#astrology#astrology observations#astroblr#astro placements#natal chart#lilith#lilith astrology#lilith aspects#mars signs#venus signs#sun sign#mercury signs#mercury aspects#sun aspects#venus aspects
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Who's Retconning?
So the update's pretty exciting! Happy 4/13, it was a real good one. I'm very excited that Jake and Jane are on the Meat ship now, mainly because A) Jane being there means that permadeath is less likely for everyone, including Dirk and B) Jake is Dirk's biggest weakness and I want him to fuck that twink up.
That said, I've noticed the most popular understanding of this update seems to be that Vriska's doing retcons. I can understand why, she's certainly involved and doing a lot, but I disagree. I think what we're dealing with here is Vriska collaborating with Jasprose...and also June, who is the one doing the actual retconning.
Let's do a little bit of visual analysis of the imagery in this update so I can explain why.
First things first, let's consider the power we've been shown Vriska has gained here. Her ascension seems to have enabled her to travel through space at the speed of light, or even faster somehow--fast enough to escape the boundary of the black hole that divides Candy from Meat-- achieving the impossible, since not even Light can escape a black hole-- and then cutting through who knows how much Space to get to Deltritus practically instantly.
But there's a problem there. As fast as she is, Vriska is still depicted as traveling. She is moving in a trayectory across space and time.
If Vriska could retcon, doing this wouldn't be necessary for her at all. She could simply warp instantly from one location to another, like John warping into the Masterpiece. He doesn't *come into* the Masterpiece from anywhere--he's not there one moment, and in the next moment, he is. It cuts out the idea of travel entirely.
If Vriska is trying to get to Deltritus as efficiently as possible, and it sure doesn't look like she's wasting any time, then it doesn't really seem like John style retcons are an option for her.
The other thing that people are pointing to as a Retcon is Vriska burning John's farewell letters to his friends, with some even assuming this means she's retconning his death entirely from the beginning. I find this unlikely, because it would change Terezi's character arc and motivations considerably and a lot of weight has been put on the corpse in her wallet modus.
But honestly, it doesn't even look like she retconned the letters. It just looks like she outright destroyed them. There's still fire and scorch marks where they were laying--there's still a mark that they existed. Reducing something to ash isn't the same as making it like it never existed at all.
I think there's an alternate possibility, too. If the hellfire is a new manifestation of Light specific to Vriska, then she could have stolen the letters through Light instead. At the moment, most of Meat's cast doesn't even seem to know what happened to John.
What would happen if Vriska put John's letters, now abandoned completely since not even Jane and Jake are on Earth C to pick them up otherwise, in all their hands? It seems like a good way to get everyone organized and motivated to help John.
And Vriska probably isn't thinking about the Candy timeline folks, but what if John's letter to Jade reached Candy Jade, for example? There could be a lot of narrative utility and emotional catharsis in a beat like that. So I think it's likelier she just took them than that they're retconned out of existence.
Now don't get me wrong--Vriska definitely did something to the Meat crew. She's the one causing that turbulence, after all, and whatever she's doing definitely involves her powers. But her powers are also very, very visually distinct, in a way that conflicts with the idea that she's the one who put Jake and Jane on the Meat ship.
Because the narrative goes out of its way to show us this panel of Jasprose, and the wisp of blue depicted here looks nothing like the dark blue lasers and hellfire that Vriska manifests.
Instead, it looks very distinctly like a wisp of air, J00N's breathy blue.
As if June was just standing in front of her, and whisked out of the scene with Jane and Jake in tow, leaving her alone in Midnight City.

This is as Jasprose expected, of course. In her 666 conversation with Davepeta, Jasprose outright says that she's made progress improving Jane's politics, and that while Jake is still heartbroken over Dirk, she's confident she can bring out his latent heroism before "curtain call"--in other words, before it's time to take the stage where it's relevant.
Jasprose told us this was going to happen ages ago. She's been preparing Jane and Jake for it this whole time. So Catnapped's arc hasn't been retconned--it's simply been concluded, and this panel is signaling to us that Jane and Jake have just left her neck of the woods and departed for the Meat Ship plot.
So again--if Vriska's responsible, then why not her standard blue light and hellfire here? Why this wispy, breathy blue instead? If that's just meant to be smoke from her pipe, then why the breathy blue at all? Wouldn't a noir-ish grey make more sense?
Here's something to consider: We've already seen June Egbert exists at some point in the future. Whether she's a revived Meat John or a Candy John that has broken out of the black hole, as the most fully realized version of herself, she will almost certainly reclaim her Retcon power anyway.
To be honest, it's such a unique and character specific ability that I'd be pretty surprised if Vriska just happened to get it through helltier too. It just seems like a strange ability to give to multiple characters, though I suppose its not impossible. What it would be, though, is a little redundant.
If June exists and has retcon *ever*, even far in the plot's future from our perspective, then she can by definition go back in time to fuck with the plot at any time, in any place, retroactively. We may not have seen June directly yet, but it makes perfect sense that her touch would be felt:
She is already here.
Lastly, consider that if this Jake & Jane retcon on the Meat Ship is a product of Vriska, June and Jasprose collaborating to bring about a tactical timeline change, that paints a much stronger picture than if its just Vriska dominating the plot and taking charge of everything herself as is her traditional route.
It would speak to an increased ability to engage in genuine teamwork and coordination with equals on Vriska's part. I like that better for this new phase of Vriskaing. After all, she's normal now. She doesn't have to do everything by herself.
#homestuck#homestuck: beyond canon#upd8#Vriska Serket#June Egbert#theory posting#homestuck^2#HSBC#HS2
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the elitism in magic education


HELLO đ€Ą I have come to you today with an analysis of Fellow Honest's motives and what they imply about the mages and non-mages in the world of Twisted Wonderland, as well as the state of magic education as it relates to one's social status. It's a doozy, so let's get right into it! ***WARNING: Spoilers for Stage in Playful Land!!***
Fellow's resentment of the elite harkens back to something I've always suspected but also something that Twisted Wonderland has seldom gone out of its way to shine a harsh spotlight on. That "something" is the discrepancy between the "haves" and the "have-nots" in terms of magic. With the main setting of TWST being a private magic school, of course the lens through which we view many events will be from this perspective as well... and that limits what we see and hear. Most of the NPCs we encounter (even the annoying ones, such as the Magicam Monsters from the first Halloween event) endlessly praise the NRC students just for attending a famous magic school. If we look closely though, weâll start to see cracks in the shiny rose-colored lenses (which, coincidentally, is how Fellowâs UM name is written).
To begin with, we are told that only 10% of the human population (for the sake of argument, let's assume that most other races also have low magic rates) is even capable of magic to begin with. Of this 10%, the majority of people with the aptitude for magic only have enough to barely be able to lift a cup. In order to qualify for a prestigious magic school like Night Raven College or Royal Sword Academy, you'd literally have to be the cream of the crop and get lucky in terms of genetics. Magic cannot be learned by someone that was not born with the innate ability for it, and not everyone who is the child of a mage will be capable of magic themselves. This is already one HUGE barrier for entry. We now have more to consider.
Night Raven College is notably a private boarding school. This potentially means that students may need to pay a tuition fee for classes, room, and board. Perhaps this tuition doesn't exist, since NRC doesn't take applications but rather hand-selects its students. Additionally, NRC is based on a British school, and most European schools cost little to nothing to attend. However, it's hard to believe a school as fancy as NRC is a private institution that runs solely on the charity and goodwill of donors (though we do see Crowley happily accepting donations as well, specifically from the local town and from Kalimâs family). Realistically speaking, Stuff Costs Money, and if you Want Stuff, you also Need Money. NRC is not raising these mages of the future out of the goodness of their hearts, NRC is raising these mages because there is profit and prestige to be gained from the endeavor. What if there are students who are picked to go but end up having to leave because they canât afford it?? This point is just speculative though; I wonât count it as actual evidence since there is no in-game lore which confirms tuition. We do know, however, that students do at least have to pay for their dorm uniforms, as Ruggie has mentioned he could not afford oneâhence why he wears a hand-me-down from Leona. We also know students are on their own when it comes to paying for their food, as both Ruggie and Deuce mention being low on cash in reference to buying meals/snacks. Buuuuut even if we discount that money is a factor that gatekeeps some selected students from attending or having the cash to just get by on a daily basis, what we cannot ignore is that money inherently puts some people ahead of others before magic schools even recruit them.
Because the majority of those in Twisted Wonderland are incapable of using magic, magic is not typically included in general education. This means that if your kid manifests magic and you want them to be "ahead of the curve", you'd need to seek out resources for magic training and education. Now, this could mean reading materials, private tutoring, or reaching out to mages you know of. The problem with all of these things is that they tend to require money and/or connections, which are things not everyone has access to. Idia even says in book 6 that Riddle has an âartificially largeâ pool of magic due to how young Riddle started his magic training, meaning that the wealthy has the resources to just produce âbetterâ mages. The rich also have more money to throw into items to help with magical training, such as bigger and better magestones (which must sell for substantial amount in the first place since Ruggie tries to save some to pawn off later in Vargas Camp) to keep mages healthier for longer (since magestones help absorb blot). This keeps power concentrated in an already elevated class. (Note: research has shown that money opens up and expands one's connections, which still puts the rich in an advantageous position compared to the less fortunate. There are also studies that show impoverished people who happen to have rich friends have a better chance of raising their own social standing just because of the doors and connections that rich friend can open for them.) Look at who in the main cast remarks on having formal magic training: literal royalty like Leona and the upper middle class like Riddle. Again, one could say that because schools like NRC appear to hand-pick students regardless of how much formal magic training they had prior to enrollment. However, the fact remains that it simply looks better to potential recruiters (using this blanket term because we don't know how magic schools besides NRC gets its students) and better prepares the child for magic school curriculum to get an early start on it.
Looking back at the 22 boys that make up the main cast, close to three-quarters or ~75% of them come from at least upper middle-class backgrounds and quite a few could classify as wealthy:
Riddle's parents are both doctors, with Riddle's mom in particular being well-known and well-regarded in their home community.
Cater's dad is a banker; his position is high enough up that he needs to relocate every so often (presumably to service their largest or most important firms).
Leona is a literal prince. Even if he isn't destined to be king, he still has access to the resources and wealth avaliable to a royal.
Azul's mom owns the most popular restaurant in the entire Coral Sea (have you seen how large the Coral Sea is on the world map???), and his stepdad is a lawyer.
The twins' family is said to be well-off; they are able to afford luxuries like fancy clothes and Mr. Leech stresses the importance of manners and presentation. He is implied to have business associates who are also well-off and would like to get in his good graces. (Popular fan speculation is that the Leeches are a crime family.)
Kalim is the heir to a massive family fortune and trading business. He also has relatives (by marriage, I believe) who are royals.
Jamil, as Kalim's attendant, is also from a reasonably well-off family; they receive benefits unique to being closely tied with the Asims, such as exposure to elite society and lessons to acquire various skills, albeit these benefits comes with being in the lower social position of a servant.
Vil's father is an A-list celebrity, and Vil is also one himself.
We don't know the specifics of what Rook's family does, but it must be well-paying, as we learn in book 5 that the Hunts have villas all over Twisted Wonderland, as well as permissions for international travel via warp pads.
Idia and Ortho's family run a secret organization that researches blot. S.T.Y.X. is so secretive that basically only those in super high positions like Crowley and Leona would know about them. Let's also not forget that the Shrouds have ties to the Jupiter Conglomerate and the Olympus Corp, which is a tech giant in the world of TWST.
Malleus is prince AND the heir to his kingdomâs throne. He is also one of the top 5 most powerful mages in the entire WORLD.
Lilia is a renown war general and a close friend of royalty. He raised a young Malleus as well.
Silver is Lilia's adopted son and is actually a prince himself.
Sebek's parents are dentists. They must make mad money. His grandfather is also a respected knight that served alongside Lilia.
Notice how all the dorm leaders are upper middle class or higher; the vice dorm leaders have ONE normal person (Trey); in Playful Land, Trey confesses to living a comfortable life so we know he must be at least middle class.
We can try to argue all we like that NRC doesn't discriminate based on social status for their selections, but if that's the case then why are so few of the main cast from impoverished or low-income families? Only Ace, Trey, and Jack count as squarely middle class. Ruggie is the only example we have of someone from a very low socioeconomic status rising up to be among "elites". The other example is Deuce, who comes from a single parent household and has implied they don't have a lot of money (for example: how the VDC/SDC earnings will help out his family). (Epel is kind of a ??? case because depending on where in the story you are, his family could be in financial trouble or not; in book 5, they imply his entire village is having difficulties selling product until Vil promotes Harveston apples on his Magicam.) Maybe it's unfair to say that 22 students out of 800ish is representative of the makeup of the entire NRC student population (or represents the composition of all magic schools), but Ruggie confirms in his Birthday Boy vignettes that a majority of the students at NRC are decently well-off. This single digit representation of low-income students is also true of real-life elite schools. They are private schools for a reason; it naturally gatekeeps who is and isn't "allowed" to attend, leading to the majority of its students being members of the elite.
Another thing to consider is legacy students. This term refers to the increased likelihood of people being accepted into a school if they had a relative that also attended that school. We know of two instances of this happening: Ace's brother and Sebek's brother also went to and graduated from Night Raven College. Ace even makes a remark during his sorting ceremony that he ended up in the same dorm as his older brother "as expected". If magic aptitude is genetic, then perhaps it makes sense to recruit from the same families--but again, this is inherently restrictive, as you would continuously be culling from the same pools generation after generation.
Back on the topic of bloodlines and family, what about Kalim, who has an extensive family? There will be no shortage of Asim mages going to NRC just because of legacy (Jamil even alludes to the fact that the previous Scarabia dorm leader was an Asim relative, and his recommendation is what got Kalim the dorm leader seat). And speaking of Kalim, consider instances where rich families are able to bribe faculty (lookin' at YOU, Crowley) or donate a large sum to get their kid ahead or to be given priority over others that may be more qualified than them (RIP Jamil). To continue off that point, NRC itself is structured as a "dog eat dog" world. Those with inherently more magical ability have the right to trump over others. You can duel and lose your dorm seat to a more powerful mage, even if you trump them in terms of merit or leadership qualities. Students feel a sense of duty to obey those who have bested them in battle (ie Epel's servitude to Vil). Everyone fears Malleus. Your magical power is respected above all else.
Attitudes surrounding magic have notably shifted from fear of it several hundreds of years ago (around the human-fae war, back when âwitchâ and âwizardâ were used in a derogatory sense) to recognizing it for its strengths and actively seeking it or granting some favoritism to those who have it. There is, in fact, now class discrimination in based on whether or not you can use magic. We got an early instance of this as early as book 1 of the main story, when Riddle insults Yuu for their "pitiful" education and states that they were clearly "born to parents with no great magical capability". Itâs something that clearly rubs Ace, who has a magicless father, the wrong way, and he stands up for Yuu. There are other subtle hints about this divide sprinkled throughout the lore. For example, Ruggie has a voice line which he indicates that the slums where he comes from doesnât produce many magic users. Again, recall that magic runs in bloodlines. This could potentially allude to a past where those without magic were forced into lower income neighborhoods, which results in pockets like Ruggieâs hometown with a high population of magicless individuals living in poverty. This doesnât appear to be a large scale issue (perhaps its only an isolated case?), but this is worth paying attention to.
This could all translate into the professional world too. Some jobs are entirely locked behind magic (ie you just cannot do them or pursue them if you don't have the magical ability for it). Some jobs DO require magic (ie medical mages like Riddle's parents, magic police force officers, technomantic inventors, etc) and probably additional training that goes with it. As a result, I'd imagine that these magic-intensive jobs pay quite a bit more. There may also be overall more job opportunities for those capable of magic, since magic is so much more efficient than doing things by hand. The magic police force in particular are described as âeliteâ and members are REQUIRED to be mages or else you donât qualify. It means more retention of wealth and/or more upward mobility for the few impoverished that are able to enter magic schools. (This is, of course, not including the few and far between cases of regular people who get rich in select industries, such as Kalimâs father.) Recall too that NRC requires its students to take internships during their 4th years, many placements being with very prestigious groups and organizations such as pro-sports teams, labs, tech giants, etc. Being able to attend a prestigious school with connections grants those elite students even more opportunities than the average person.
Then think about what this means for people who fall short of these standards that these magic schools set. We actually have examples of them in book 5 of the main story: when Deuce and Epel are reconciling on the beach, a bunch of delinquents from another school come along and start checking out Deuceâs borrowed magical wheel. Through the NPCsâ exchange, we learn that one of them has enough magic to power a magical wheel, but not enough to do much else. This NPC also couldnât keep up in class and dropped out of a magic school. He then becomes insulted when Deuce implies he is âa beginnerâ, so this is obviously a very sore spot for him. Riddle also has dialogue that implies students dropped out of NRC prior to his reign (and since then, no Heartslabyul students have left). Additionally, consider how magic can be used to oppress and lord power over others. Deuce himself is guilty for summoning cauldrons to crush rival delinquents in fights back in Clock Townâeven if those delinquents lacked magic themselves. Similarly, Epel is implied to use magic to gain an upper hand against those that bullied him back home. This all implies a social divide between those with magic and those without, and begs of bigger questions.
What happens to the ones that donât make it? The ones that get left behind? The ones without the magic to make it âbigâ? This is the root of Fellowâs anger; heâs mad at a system that cast people like him (someone with very little magic) and Gidel (a non-mage) aside. They donât get the opportunity to make better futures for themselves. Theyâre looked down on by high-up institutions that basically tell them theyâre not good enough.
Knowing all of this, the deck appears to be stacked against the poor and non-mages. Itâs no wonder why Fellow is so mad.
THIS ACTUALLY RELATES BACK TO WHAT ROLLO SAID IN 5-2 OF GLORIOUS MASQUERADE⊠"When you have too little [magic], you're resentful. And when you have plenty [of magic], you're arrogant. You can never content yourselves." The NRC boys are arrogant (this is the side of the story weâve always known due to seeing the world mainly from their perspective). They are the âhavesâ, and we see them constantly misusing their power by fighting each other over very petty things (even if itâs against the rules to do so). But everyone else??? Theyâre scrounging for the scraps. Fellow falls into that former category; he IS the guy thatâs resentful because of his lack of magic and how something he cannot control has already determined where he and Gidel will stand in life no matter how hard they work. They can never hope to rise out of poverty, and thereâs nothing they can do about it. That must be soul-crushing.
When Fellow praises the NRC boys in that overly exaggerated way, heâs obviously being shady and facetiousâhowever, there is also a kernel of truth behind this behavior. Most other NPCs weâve met have spoken about the NRC boys favorably just because of their affiliation with a prestigious school. Itâs the same way people might be impressed if you walked around in an Ivy League branded hoodie or something. People automatically associate you with the schoolâs shiny and exclusive reputation, and thus assume you are also intelligent, talented, etc. Then, in the same way being constantly put on a pedestal like this might result in the students getting swelled heads, this only further feeds into the NRC kidsâ egos. They so privileged they donât even recognize it. And that makes Fellow fucking FUME.
Look back at Fellow's dialogue. He is constantly mentioning the prestige of the school the boys go to, or adding on extra compliments about their status and skills. He's ass-kissing to his boss, who is also wealthy or part of the upper class, then insults the boss once he hangs up. Fellow is always in a position where he HAS to be subservient to the upper class in order to make his money and get by, and he finds that entirely unfair. Imagine having to simper and placate people you absolutely despise and blame for your problems every day, people who are gorging themselves on luxuries, coasting by in life, taking everything they have for granted while you get by on penniesâthat has to get frustrating.
I want to briefly mention here that, in addition to praising the NRC students to high heaven, Fellow also talks down his own skills. He cheerfully calls himself a loser and says that no matter how much he trains, he could never reach their caliber of magic. Yes, Fellow is exaggerating to get the kids to think theyâve won, but I also have to wonder if heâs parroting the same phrases he was told long ago, from people who doubted him and never thought heâd make it. If thatâs the case, then I get the sense that Fellow is in a way âreclaimingâ his autonomy and power by adopting those same cruel words and using them as a strength. He admits to being âweakâ but is also proud of the fact that he can utilize his magic along with his natural charisma to get a leg up over others. It further fuels his new belief that going to an elite school doesnât matter, itâs practical skills that will serve you well.
Okay, back to talking about his shitty work situation! Fellowâs employer clearly doesnât treat him with decency. They berate him, make unreasonable demands, act impatient, etc. They are a typical depiction of a toxic workplace and boss. This can also be read as shorthand for the relation between the rich and the poor, and how that may have shaped (or worsened) Fellowâs views on others of the privileged class. He makes many assumptions about the NRC students without really getting to know them, calling them entitled brats. Why? Because these descriptors likely apply to the higher-ups Fellow has always slaved away for. This, in combination with his own experiences in being rejected from magic academia, has created a person who feels trodden on by society and by the upper echelons who run it and benefit off the system.
Fellow himself is the perfect example of someone who was failed by said system. He has dialogue stating that he was never given the chance to learn because his magic was not considered strong enough. Still, he tried to make an effort to earn that chance among to elites and to study among them. Fellow was rejected, ridiculed, and told he had âforgotten his placeâ, what he had been born into. There were expectations he couldnât meet, and so Fellow was thrown away like a broken toy. He has failed not because he didnât try, but because he was denied the opportunity to begin with. This is where is rage stems from. Fellow despises the students of those same kinds of institutions who kicked him down, students who donât realize how fortunate they are for their educations and will likely continue to perpetuate the system.
What, then, does that means for his signature spell, which is closely tied to oneâs identity? Letâs take a magnifying glass to it. As previously mentioned, the name for Fellowâs spell is written as âRose-Tinted Dreamâ, but it is said out loud as âLife is Funâ. The chant for it is, âCome on to the theaterâ (notably said in English rather than in Japanese). Both the spell and the incantation are references to the song Honest John sings in Pinocchio, Hi- Diddle-Dee-Dee. And⊠well, the whole UM in of itself is one big cruel joke given his circumstances now.
I think this spell is representative of a young Fellow still full of hopes and dreams, looking forward to studying at a magic school. But then those dreams are shattered and he has to commit terrible crimes to survive day-to-day, and he seems to have given up on his dreams. He even goes so far as to protect Gidel from having the same hopes he once did, telling Yuu to not put silly ideas in his head when Gidel expressed curiosity about school. At the same time, he delights in crushing the hopes of those he deems his enemies (stating that he wanted to betray Kalim to âteach him a lessonâ about how cruel the world is). Fellow knows the truth: that life isnât fun, that it will disappoint you and will put you down. His actions are very cowardly as wellâhe uses tricks and deception, he runs away from his problems instead of properly addressing them, the NRC students remark on his lack of pride. Fellow has had to throw away so much to scrape by. Yet his UM symbolizes someone brimming with hopeâso perhaps itâs a UM he manifested when Fellow still thought he had a chance?? And then people made fun of him for it being so weak?? Alternatively, maybe he didnât get his UM until after his dreams were crushed so heâs looking back on those nostalgic days of blissful ignorance with rose-colored lenses (which is, again, maybe why his UM magic name is written as âRose Tinted Dreamâ). A UM that is a reflection of oneâs true self, yet that same identity is one that has been forced to be discarded. Thatâs the reason why, despite all the swindling and scamming, I donât think Fellowâs enthusiasm for fun is a lie. Thatâs the one ârealâ part of him, but even thatâs been repurposed to help him live on scraps, something innocent twisted đ and thatâs really sad to think aboutâŠ
But also??? You could argue that Fellow still has a little bit of that lost inner child and hope left in him. He tries to defend Gidelâs understanding of the world and has goals of starting his own school despite how poorly he originally spoke about these institutions. (So Fellow does appear to care about children and their futures.) He also has a childish streak despite being an adult, demonstrated by his use of cowardly tactics, taunting kids, and abruptly quitting his job to then destroy his workplace. Fellow himself states that he âjust tries to live a free and fun lifeâ, thus his pursuit of money and pleasure. This could all play into being what defines Fellow and thus his UM. It embodies a spirit of playfulness even when he has been crushed under the weight of an unglamorous life.
Iâve heard people saying that while Rollo is Idiaâs dark mirror and Fellow is Ruggieâs. They have similar backstories but ultimately their fates are different and left the former two down far more sinister paths. Just as Rollo is an Idia that turned his anger outward instead of inward, Fellow is Ruggie had he not been given a chance to receive an education to elevate his social status and job prospects. Fellow and Ruggie both cling to rich, powerful benefactors/bosses and do their dirty work to get on byâa big difference is that Leona, while he does also work Ruggie to the bone, also has some conscience. Something else to consider is that while Ruggie prioritizes making a life for himself by studying and securing a stable, well-paying job, Fellow is focused moreso on the accumulation of wealth itself (as he suggests to Kalim heâll take a bribe to let him go free and quits when there is no longer money to be gained from his boss). Both donât really care how they get their money (even if it is by dirty means), but ultimately Ruggieâs way of making cash is more sustainable in the long run. Yet Fellow ultimately realizes the importance of school deep down despite constantly denying it when the NRC students tell him of it. Fellow is in denial because thatâs the only way he can cope and justify his lifestyle. Heâs confused when finally confronted with students who are his ideal of âhappy and freeâ, even when theyâre in an educational system that he views as shackling people into strict roles. The way he laments about not being able to go to school is also very reminiscent of an adult mourning a lost or unfulfilling childhood, which is quite a depressing scenarioâŠ
Fellow is the one that got the short end of the stick in life. Ruggie met Leona, and Leona technically uplifted him in his endeavors, tutored him into getting decent grades and giving him hand-me-downs and money in exchange for his services. Fellow never had that kind of support system, he was just insulted and bullied into giving up and had to find an alternative way to keep himself going đ
Personally, I think Fellow could also be a dark mirror to Kalim, no?? They exist on opposite ends of a social spectrum. Kalim has everything and Fellow had nothing. Whatâs more, Kalim is still wide-eyed and trusting. He is the only one willing to try words instead of fighting him and instantly labeling him as the enemy. Meanwhile, Fellow has become bitter because of how the world has betrayed him. He wants to take that trust Kalim has and show him how cruel everything truly is. Why is he fixated on that? Why even offer in the first place if he never intended on going through with it? Why does he want to rub it in Kalimâs face in particular? Maybe itâs because Kalim seems rich and dumb, as Fellow claims, but maybe itâs because there is envy there. Sure, Fellow is upset about Kalim being a sheltered brat that faces no challenges in life, but I also feel like heâs jealous that Kalim can still afford to think this way. That he can still afford to be cheerful, that he can still be a dreamer. Fellow was alluded to be like that onceâbut he canât be like that anymore, not when he has to look out for himself and Gidel.
Side note, another comparison! Recall that Kalimâs Oasis Maker is also a UM that uses a little bit of magic. However, Kalim does not know of many creative ways to use his spell, as there is no real reason to since his home country has lots of canals and irrigation. He therefore deems his UM as pretty useless. Fellow meanwhile has what most consider a weak UM but he fully utilizes it to his advantage and pairs it well with his natural charm to maximize its effects. He had to develop these skills because he was in pressing circumstances in which they would benefit him. This contributes to the âmirrorâ theme between the two.
Fellow and Kalim have a notable similarity as well, and this is where I feel they can connect. They are both older brothers to a child or children who are magicless. Fellow only has one, and Kalim has manyâbut the number here isnât what is important. What is important is that Fellow and Kalim think the world of their siblings and want to support them. To that end, Fellow is willing to be cruel and step on others, and Kalim is all sunshine to keep their spirits up. Fellow has suffered through great poverty and insults and Kalim has survived so many attempts on his life, yet theyâve developed distinctly different approaches to the worlds that have embraced them. Kalimâs wealth could afford him protection and luxuries, so heâs able to live carefree with others tending to his needs. The same isnât true for Fellow, and so he came out far more spiteful and resentful.
Thinking about it, itâs ultimately Kalimâs words that convince Fellow to turn on his employer. (The other boys certainly wore Fellow down and planted the seeds of doubt, but itâs Kalim that I believe fully resonates with Fellow.) He can so happily talk about why he loves school, even though he doesnât do well at it (something I presume is also true of Fellow, since he is lacking in tons of magic). Itâs not said in a particularly articulate manner, but itâs so candid in its presentation. Kalim is relating to him based on similar skillset (or lack thereof) and sharing fond memories of his time at school, reviving the hopeful âlost childâ in Fellow. Kalim is probably the first wealthy person in a long time that was friendly, kind, and supportive to him. And here he is, reassuring Fellow his dreams are still possible, to not give up. Thatâs the final nail that allows Fellow to be âhonestâ with himself and his inner child. Itâs what leads to that slew of irresponsible actions at the end of the event (letting people free, blasting the amusement park, driving a sinking ship, etc.).
At the end of Stage in Playful Land, we see that Fellow never really let that childlike side of him fully die. (It seems to have been concealed under a desire for money and appeasing his boss.) He shares his dream of creating his own great school to give educational opportunities to non-mages and mages with low magical reserves like Gidel and himself, a school that teaches practical life lessons. He wants to promote his own ideals and to change the system he hates from the inside out. This was never communicated to us before most likely because Fellow had renounced those ideas in favor of blind hatred and a lack of faith in the world and those that dominate it.
Fellow also acknowledges that life may be even more difficult for him and Gidel going forward, as now they lack the money for even food and no longer have jobs. Furthermore, they need to worry about their ex-employers coming after them for what theyâve done. Even so, Fellow faces it all with a smile and reassures everyone that they can transfer or visit to play⊠âon this shining stage called lifeâ. He and Gidel are able to walk away with their whimsy preserved, and can still be that which theyâve always wanted to be: dreamers.
All of this is to say that Rollo was right all along about magic, he never missesâ
#twst#twisted wonderland#Fellow Honest#twisted wonderland analysis#twisted wonderland character analysis#twst analysis#twst character analysis#Ferro Honest#Rollo Flamme#Gidel#Gidell#disney twisted wonderland#notes from the writing raven#spoilers#Dire Crowley#Heartslabyul#Savanaclaw#Octavinelle#Scarabia#Pomefiore#Ignihyde#Diasomnia#Yuu#Ruggie Bucchi#Kalim Al-Asim#Jamil Viper#Pinocchio#Honest John#Riddle Rosehearts#Ruggi Bucchi
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@ccile03 has very kindly invited me to give my two (million) cents on this and i wanted to explain, as best i could, how i interpreted majima's character arc in pirate yakuza. however. this post definitely got away from me, so be prepared, this is going to be a LONG one, and it's the most comprehensive analysis i've done of majima as a character to date. i think i just wanted an excuse to talk about the game, honestly
introduction
i think i should start by saying that i think what we see in this game is not an arc for majima in its entirety, but the culmination of one that we had been observing (glimpsing, really) from the sidelines for years. so the question of "what arc did majima have in this game?" is really a question of "what arc did majima have in this series?" and to answer that, we have to start at the beginning.
from the moment he's introduced in the first game, majima is shown to be cynical and nihilistic.
scott strichart, who was in charge of majima's english localization throughout y0-k2 and y6-y7, had this to say about this scene, which i completely agree with:
First, you need to understand Majima's primary motivation - Saejima. Ever since he missed participating in that hit, Majima's singular, driving goal is to give Saejima the opportunity to confront him and exact whatever punishment he feels is appropriate. So Majima sets out from square -1 to get back into the Tojo Clan and gain enough power and position to do that. But as you know, in Y0, he discovers that some costs are too great, which throws his entire life's purpose into question: How do I balance my own sense of right and wrong with the tenacity I must have in order get back into the clan and to Saejima? That answer comes in the shape of three different dudes who give him three different answers to how one is "tenacious" - Lee, who would go to ANY length to protect the ones he loves, Nishitani, who throws his entire self into his pursuit of pleasure, and even Sagawa, who as Majima tells him, is "practically immortal." But what happens to his three paragons of tenacity? Well, you know that answer if you've played Y0. What happens when Majima attempts to take the moral high ground? What happens when he dares to show some modicum of emotion? [...] And the evidence of Majima's mindset in Kiwami is right in the first few lines when you meet him: What's the point of doing the right thing? "Doing things that way is going to break you." But no⊠that's just a projection. Majima is the one who got broken. And if you've played Y2 through Y5, you see the facade slowly start to fade. It's a really interesting growth of the character.
note the parts i highlighted in bold. we will get back to these later.
i think to understand majima and what this game does for him as a character, you have to understand both his problem and how he has tried to solve that problem. you have to understand his tragedy. and for that, you have to understand the psychological consequences of being part of an organization like the yakuza. the emotional impact it has on your life, on your relationship with yourself, and why. this context informs most of my analysis because i think its inextricable from majima as a character. i will also be heavily quoting simone weil to talk about these ideas, so please bear with me.
1. understanding the problem (and what it isn't)
the thing is, it's not easy to do awful things to other people. it's not easy to extort money from people, it's not easy to threaten them, it's not easy to attack someone when it's not in self defense. it's not easy to be mean. it's not easy to lie, cheat, steal. all of these things have an emotional toll: guilt. now, guilt goes away if you let it, but that has a spiritual toll. but where does that guilt come from in the first place?
simone weil says:
There exists an obligation towards every human being for the sole reason that he or she is a human being, without any other condition requiring to be fulfilled, and even without any recognition of such obligation on the part of the individual concerned.
All human beings are bound by identical obligations [...]. No human being, whoever he may be, under whatever circumstances, can escape them without being guilty of crime; save where there are two genuine obligations which are in fact incompatible, and a man is forced to sacrifice one of them. The imperfections of a social order can be measured by the number of situations of this kind it harbours within itself. But even in such a case, a crime is committed if the obligation so sacrificed is not merely sacrificed in fact, but its existence denied into the bargain.
majima is torn between two incompatible obligations. his obligation towards every human being in the world, and his obligation towards saejima. whether or not his obligation to saejima is a genuine one is a matter of interpretation (as in, whether or not he was really responsible for failing saejima. i think there is merit to his sense of responsibility regarding this, but that's another post) and an important distinction to make, but the fact remains that it registers to majima as a genuine one.
weil also says:
There is a reality outside the world, that is to say, outside space and time, outside man's mental universe, outside any sphere whatsoever that is accessible to human faculties. Corresponding to this reality, at the centre of the human heart, is the longing for an absolute good, a longing which is always there and is never appeased by any object in this world. That reality is the unique source of all the good that can exist in this world: that is to say, all beauty, all truth, all justice, all legitimacy, all order, and all human behaviour that is mindful of obligations. Those minds whose attention and love are turned towards that reality are the sole intermediary through which good can descend from there and come among men. Although it is beyond the reach of any human faculties, man has the power of turning his attention and love towards it. Nothing can ever justify the assumption that any man, whoever he may be, has been deprived of this power. It is a power which is only real in this world in so far as it is exercised. The sole condition for exercising it is consent.
now, you don't have to agree with any of this, but i will be using this framework and language to make my points because i find it useful.
what this all comes down to is that "moral behavior" is not something done only for the sake of others, and that in fact there is no distinction between the sake of oneself and others. you cannot hurt others without also hurting yourself in some way. my analysis rests on this key point.
weil says that corresponding to these human obligations, we can identify a number of human needs, some of which have to do with the physical side of life (like food, shelter, security) and some of which have to do with the moral side.
They form, like our physical needs, a necessary condition of our life on this earth. Which means to say that if they are not satisfied, we fall little by little into a state more or less resembling death, more or less akin to a purely vegetative existence.
she says that human collectivities (family, country, organization, etc.) fulfill these needs. the collectivity that majima is part of is the tojo clan and in a broader sense, the yakuza. they are not part of civil society, but as weil notes, their obligations towards people outside of the yakuza are not lessened by this fact, and anyone whose attention and love is turned towards "good" is aware of this. so they feel the full weight of these obligations. majima feels this weight.
we can see here that majima is being driven by a need, a need that corresponds to his obligations to other people. he calls it "being a man", weil calls it "being mindful of obligations."
weil has identified some of these needs, which she calls "the needs of the soul", as follows:
HONOUR is a vital need of the human soul. [...] honour has to do with a human being considered not simply as such, but from the point of view of his social surroundings. This need is fully satisfied where each of the social organisms to which a human being belongs allows him to share in a noble tradition enshrined in its past history and given public acknowledgment.
For example, for the need of honour to be satisfied in professional life, every profession requires to have some association really capable of keeping alive the memory of all the store of nobility, heroism, probity, generosity and genius spent in the exercise of that profession.
Initiative and RESPONSIBILITY, to feel one is useful and even indispensable, are vital needs of the human soul. [...] For this need to be satisfied it is necessary that a man should often have to take decisions in matters great or small affecting interests that are distinct from his own, but in regard to which he feels a personal concern. He also requires to be continually called upon to supply fresh efforts.
PUNISHMENT is a vital need of the human soul. [...] The most indispensable punishment for the soul is that inflicted for crime. By committing crime, a man places himself, of his own accord, outside the chain of eternal obligations which bind every human being to every other one. Punishment alone can weld him back again; fully so, if accompanied by consent on his part; otherwise only partially so.Â
i find this language and framework for talking about the concepts of virtue, guilt, redemption and how those things tie into one's professional and social life very useful when exploring the relationship rgg characters have to the yakuza and to themselves.
i will be focusing on these three needs for now because i think they are where the crux of majima's struggle lies. not only majima, but every yakuza who feels the weight of human obligations. because the work they do as yakuza does not fulfill their need for honor, and the crimes they commit by not fulfilling their obligations (as they are exploiting and profiting off innocent people, depriving them of their vital needs) creates the need for punishment. this is part of why we see these characters go to prison so willingly.
being yakuza means effectively denying one's own need for honor. this compels these characters to remedy this by clinging to whatever amount or kind of honor they can maintain. it's this cycle that keeps them going, that pushes these characters to commit the extraordinary acts of heroism we admire them for. it's because they are driven by the need to make up for something. for being yakuza.
weil says:
[...] a collectivity has its roots in the past. It constitutes the sole agency for preserving the spiritual treasures accumulated by the dead, the sole transmitting agency by means of which the dead can speak to the living.
she says that the need to be rooted is the most important need of the soul, and that being part of a collectivity, a "social organism" as she calls it, and having active participation in it is the only means of fulfilling this need. yakuza are no exception. RGG's consistent theme of carrying on the dreams of others is a form of "the dead speaking to the living", that is to say, a form of fulfilling the need for roots â which by the way is the name of the book these excerpts are from.
Every social organism, of whatever kind it may be, which does not provide its members with these satisfactions, is diseased and must be restored to health.
There are collectivities which, instead of serving as food, do just the opposite: they devour souls. In such cases, the social body is diseased, and the first duty is to attempt a cure; in certain circumstances, it may be necessary to have recourse to surgical methods. With regard to this matter, too, the obligation for those inside as for those outside the collectivity is an identical one. [...] Finally, there are dead collectivities which, without devouring souls, donât nourish them either. If it is absolutely certain that they are well and truly dead, that it isnât just a question of a temporary lethargy, then and only then should they be destroyed.
the yakuza, by measure of the number of situations it creates where incompatible obligations have to compete against each other, is a deeply imperfect social order. but as weil notes, sacrificing obligations and denying their existence are distinct compromises. "guilt goes away if you let it" â this is where that distinction lies. to free yourself of guilt, you have to deny the existence of these obligations, and so deny your own need for punishment. and the spiritual toll of that exchange is pragmatism, which weil describes as "spiritually crossing a boundary equivalent to death."
she says this about denying the existence of obligations:
Actually, such a negation is impossible. It amounts to spiritual suicide. And Man is so made that in him spiritual death is accompanied by psychological diseases in themselves fatal. So that, in fact, the instinct of self-preservation prevents the soul from doing more than draw closer to such a state [...]. Almost always, he who denies all obligations lies to others and to himself; in actual fact, he recognizes some amongst them. There isnât a man on earth who doesnât at times pronounce an opinion on good and evil, even if it be only to find fault with somebody else.
many yakuza try to avoid guilt (and the need for punishment) by denying the existence of human obligations. simply put, it's a way of running from accountability.
but guilt is not the reason for majima's struggle with this. majima has already decided that he is not going to cross that spiritual boundary to avoid guilt, because he understands that the consequences would be nothing more than a self-betrayal. he has too much respect for the truth to lie to himself like that. his "longing for an absolute good" compels him to accept his need for punishment. and he is not confused about what he thinks is right or wrong.
yakuza 0 was not about majima trying to decide whether or not killing an innocent girl was wrong. he knew it was wrong. it was about whether or not it was worth it to kill an innocent person. if he had been grappling with whether or not murder was wrong, it would've been equivalent to "spiritual suicide" as weil calls it. but he never denies the existence of such an obligation on his part â he never pretends it wasn't wrong to kill a defenseless civilian.
and his takeaway was that it was not worth it. it was not worth it to kill makoto to fulfill his obligation to saejima. he sacrificed his obligation to saejima, but no "crime" was committed in this process because he did not deny the existence of his obligations towards anyone. his need for honor was not sacrificed, and thus no self-betrayal took place. once again, denying human obligations is synonymous with self betrayal in this framework.
majima simply will not do something that he knows he will regret later out of guilt, and he takes care to predict what he will feel guilty about so as to avoid this outcome. his judgment regarding this remained solid throughout y0, even if it wavered at times.
another example of majima being torn between two genuine obligations was in y5.
this scene is remarkable to me because it's the only other time, aside from y0, we see the consequences of majima "daring to show a modicum of emotion." his obligations are being used against him. the "longing for an absolute good" in his heart is being used against him. because in order to fulfill his obligation to saejima here (to not put him to the same impossible choice), he would have to sacrifice a much more universal one, as well as a personal one to kiryu. and then how could he "call himself a man"?
saejima tells him that if he was the kind of person who would let haruka die, he would've killed him anyway. but this doesn't stop majima from still being apologetic in this scene â he still feels the weight of his responsibility to saejima, even if they are in agreement that it should be sacrificed. the existence of both obligations are acknowledged, thus no "crime" takes place, just like in y0. once again, we see that majima's problem is not in denying the existence of obligations.
majima's struggle here has to do with how to prevent things from coming to a point where he has to sacrifice obligations in the first place. this was his takeaway from y0. the obvious answer to this is to quit the clan, but it's too late for that. he already did that and just ended up going back. his obligations to the people in his life (saejima, kiryu) and his need for roots keep him tied to the clan.
so, what does he do instead?
2. understanding the "solution"
this is where we return to scott strichart's comment.
"How do I balance my own sense of right and wrong with the tenacity I must have in order get back into the clan and to Saejima?"
it's misleading to think of his obligation towards saejima as something to be balanced against his sense of right and wrong, as strichart puts it â in reality they are one and the same. the fact that he has to be tenacious is merely an extension of his obligation towards saejima.
more importantly, this is not a question of what moral philosophy to subscribe to, or anything that has to do with speculative reasoning. the singular question majima is struggling with the most in his life is a question of "how" â it's a question of methods.
majima has always been primarily concerned with methods. he is someone who locks onto ends and produces means to achieve them. this is what makes him resourceful. he gets his way, because he finds and makes a way. he is all about getting results.
but strichart's question is only half of majima's problem. the other half comes from his answer to the first one: "by preventing situations in which i will find myself having to choose between obligations."
majima, like strichart, has identified correctly that these situations arise only when he "dares to show a modicum of emotion." thus, the goal should be to simply stop doing that. but how is he going to do that? what method should he choose for that?
his answer to that question is mad dog. this is an answer equivalent to "whichever method works." because the factors that he takes into consideration when trying to formulate an answer for that "should" are concerned entirely with the effectiveness of the method. in other words, majima's mistake is that he doesn't think what he thinks is right or wrong should be the most important deciding factor in determining his methods for preventing situations where he has to sacrifice obligations.
it is, ironically, his dedication to solving this problem without sacrificing either obligation that makes him cross that spiritual boundary. because you see, this too is a form of pragmatism. he's essentially trading one form of spiritual death for another, and so he is still stuck in the cycle of honor and punishment. because methods are not exempt from human obligations either, yet he is denying the existence of those obligations. their existence is "denied into the bargain." pragmatism is the justification for this denial. "the world doesn't give two shits if there's a point or not, so it's better if i don't either."
weil understood the crucial role methods played:
Everything in creation is dependent on method, including the points of intersection between this world and the next.
"the next world" she is referring to is the one she says is the source of all "good" in the world. she is concerned with how to align her methods with her obligations, which is itself a problem of methods.
to majima as well, the most valuable resources in the world are methods that are effective and align with his obligations. why betray himself like this if he can avoid it? and he learns methods from observing people. this was why he ended up following shimano. this is what his "men i respect" thing is about. he means, "people i can learn something from."
but despite being already disillusioned with shimano's methods by the time he dies, he's never been able to successfully replace them with anything else. unable to find anyone around he could learn from, he has resorted to compromise. he decided he couldn't afford to commit to aligning his methods with his obligations. he has prioritized his continued survival and success in the yakuza because of his obligation to saejima, at the cost of his soul. mad dog is the product of that exchange. mad dog is the solution, the justification, the lie.
this is a sacrifice he has had to make because of the social order he exists in. this is why the yakuza is a "diseased" social organism, as weil calls it. this aspect of the yakuza and majima's views on it were explored in majima saga in k2.
let's take a look at majima's methods:
you might note, at this point, that all of these things are things kiryu would never do.
this was what fascinated him about kiryu. because kiryu is suggesting there is a right and wrong method, and not only that, he's saying it's a factor that should be considered, that deserves our attention and love, and we should be mindful of it. he's the embodiment of the principle that we can't justify denying our obligations. this is what he admires kiryu so much for â that he is not betraying himself in the way majima has. he has things to learn from kiryu, and that is what majima respects most above all else.
kiryu represented a solution to his self-imposed spiritual exile. however, this solution was not as straightforward as you would think.

fighting has always been a form of communication, of debate, in RGG. when majima and kiryu are fighting, these are the conflicting ideas that are being tested against each other. and he wants kiryu to prove his methods wrong. because he hates his methods. he realizes he's fighting for the wrong side, and he wants everything he represents to be defeated. to be able to be defeated. and he trains and mentors kiryu specifically for this purpose. he has made himself into a mascot of this spiritually vacant philosophy, but at least he can offer its enemies (which includes himself) something that would effectively function as a training dummy. he is giving kiryu the opportunity to know his enemy. this is a noble goal. it justifies the continued existence of mad dog.
this was a method he thought would work. it's pretty clever, you have to give him that. but in fact, it's only another instance of the two incompatible obligations problem. he's fulfilling his need for honor and punishment, but he's failing to fulfill his need for responsibility towards kiryu.
he needs to make up for this ongoing failure, so the series is full of examples of him going out of his way to help kiryu (y2, y3, y5, iw and now pirate yakuza). as weil said, majima "requires to be continually called upon to supply fresh efforts" for his need for responsibility to be fulfilled. he's glad for the opportunity to help kiryu. he needs kiryu to need his support. in simpler terms, he wants to be useful. he feels this need as it corresponds to his obligations towards kiryu, which are identical to his obligations towards anyone, but which he feels more keenly with kiryu because he's stuck in this cycle of honor, punishment and responsibility, trying to make up for the lack of one through fulfilling the other. and it's specifically tied to kiryu because he can only fulfill his need for honor/punishment through kiryu, because kiryu is the only one strong enough to defeat him in a fight. and yet he is failing his other obligations to him in the process BECAUSE of his method.
it would not be too much of an exaggeration to say that the integrity of majima's soul rests in the balance that is the conflict between himself and kiryu. this is why this conflict cannot end. it will remain self-perpetuating so long as they both remain mindful of obligations. they are yin and yang.
let's go back to scott strichart's comment again.
And if you've played Y2 through Y5, you see the facade slowly start to fade. It's a really interesting growth of the character.
while i agree with this, it should be noted that even though majima's facade slowly fades, nothing substantial takes its place. he literally dies in yakuza 5, and he is reborn as nothing more than a mascot, a symbol, a boss fight as far as the games are concerned. just as he was in kiwami. his methods do not change, because he still can't afford to change them. because he is still yakuza.
but he is feeling the emotional and spiritual toll of continuing those methods.

he doesn't have it in him anymore to keep up the act, to prop up mad dog to act as an interface between himself and the world around him.
note here that majima is the perfect visual representation of a dead thing â he's literally wearing the skin of dead animals, and "majima goro" is the first among them. the fact that he is narratively dead in y5, a game about dreams where everyone has an honest job is really, really on the nose when you consider things in these terms.
but y5 does a spectacular job of reminding majima why he needs to stay dead, why he chose to avoid emotional attachments and obfuscate the ones he does have in the first place. if it weren't for an impossibly unlikely chain of events, either haruka would've died or saejima would've had to kill majima. majima doesn't want to risk anyone being put to that choice again. kurosawa's whole plan hinged on the fact that he identified this as a weakness in majima that he planned to use against him â and it almost worked.

this is what he risks happening every time he has conflicting obligations. every time he "shows a modicum of emotion." he has enemies who will use it against him to hurt his loved ones. so even if he is disillusioned with mad dog, as long as he cannot think of a better method of preventing this, he needs to keep up the act. his "solution" has become another cage he finds himself in, because he can't escape the bigger cage he's in: the yakuza.
this is not a problem unique to majima. any yakuza mindful of their obligations struggles with similar problems, because it's the yakuza as an organization imposes this problem on them. it devours souls. this was why it needed to be destroyed.
3. the dissolution, and pirate yakuza
you would think that being out of the yakuza would finally solve a bunch of these problems for majima (and saejima and daigo.) instead, this is the state they're in.

because they understand that they were not the only ones who gave their souls to the clan. there were thousands of others, and those thousands joined the clan because of them. because of the promises they made. it is their responsibility to honor their men's sacrifices and their own promises by taking care of them after the dissolution, but they have no way of fulfilling their need for responsibility, honor or punishment as it concerns their obligations to these people.
the shame, guilt and helplessness is really setting in as they are forced to face their failure. and the sacrifices they made along the way? they have nothing to show for any of it. all the justifications, all the self-betrayals, all the compromises. the obligations they sacrificed. the people they've hurt. this is where it all culminates.
this is how lost they are, how lost majima is â he seems to be doing the worst out of the three of them â in the absence of any methods to reconnect to and do right by the social organism he's part of, his roots. they are cut off from any means of helping the people they used to lead and feel responsible for. they are uprooted.
weil says:
Uprootedness is by far the most dangerous malady to which human societies are exposed, for it is a self-propagating one. For people who are really uprooted there remain only two possible sorts of behaviour: either to fall into a spiritual lethargy resembling death [...] or to hurl themselves into some form of activity necessarily designed to uproot, often by the most violent methods, those who are not yet uprooted, or only partly so.
Whoever is uprooted himself uproots others. Whoever is rooted himself doesnât uproot others.
majima, saejima and daigo fell into the former category. it is a testament to how mindful they are of obligations that they did not fall into the latter.
kiryu tried to break them out of that spiritual lethargy in infinite wealth, reminding them of their obligations. remember what i said earlier about kiryu being the "embodiment of the principle that we can't justify denying our obligations"? this is him doing it again, as always. and this was the single most life-affirming thing he could do for them.
on the growing of roots, weil had this to say:
The problem of a method for breathing an inspiration into a people is quite a new one. [...] It is unfortunate for us that this problem, in regard to which, unless I am wrong, we have nothing we can look to for guidance, should be precisely the one that requires today the most urgent solution on our part.
she identified the problem of growing roots as a problem of methods of inspiring people. on this, she wrote:
It sometimes happens that a thought, either formulated to oneself or not formulated at all, works secretly on the mind and yet has but little direct influence over it. If one hears this thought expressed publicly by some other person, and especially by someone whose words are listened to with respect, its force is increased an hundredfold and can sometimes bring about an inner transformation. It can also happen that one needs, whether one realizes it or not, to hear certain words, which, if they are effectively pronounced, and in a quarter whence one would normally expect good to come from, infuse comfort, energy and as it were a food.
just as this was the case with kiryu in infinite wealth, it is the case with noah in pirate yakuza.
violence is a tool. majima has always viewed it as such, but here noah is telling him that not only is it a tool, he doesn't think it's an inherently bad one. he thinks it's cool. he is radically accepting of majima in a way he has never experienced before.
we know that majima has had a complicated history with violence. he hit his wife and left her. he's been using it as a method to keep his subordinates in line for years â something he ideologically does not agree with, but has accepted as a necessary sacrifice. it's not a coincidence that the first thing majima remembers about himself is his guilt surrounding his violence â guilt enabled to become manifest in the absence of his justification, in the absence of mad dog, which had acted not only as an interface between majima and the world, but between himself and his own needs. everything was filtered through mad dog.
but instead of condoning violence via majima's philosophy of pragmatism, which majima has used as a justification (a lie), noah is offering him a way out of the dilemma he's been stuck in for decades. he suggests that as long as you're fighting for the right thing (which majima is in this case), violence is a perfectly acceptable method that does not constitute a crime, and thus, should not create a need for punishment. it's reassuring to majima in exactly the way he needs. it's also something no one else in his life could reassure him about, because they're too busy feeling guilty about their own violence. only someone who is truly "innocent" could absolve majima of this guilt.
majima's face in that last shot is all the evidence you need for its impact. this is what he's needed to hear his whole life, and it would not have had the same impact coming from anyone other than a child. and it had to be this specific child, because:
To no matter whom the question may be put in general terms, nobody is of the opinion that any man is innocent if, possessing food himself in abundance and finding someone on his doorstep three parts dead from hunger, he brushes past without giving him anything. So it is an eternal obligation towards the human being not to let him suffer from hunger when one has the chance of coming to his assistance.
this was the model on which weil based her theory of human needs and obligations, because it was "the most obvious obligation of all." it also happens to be the opening scene of pirate yakuza.

noah's attention and love is demonstrably turned towards human obligations. he is also notably the only person around who has fulfilled this most obvious of obligations. majima himself acknowledges this, saying he "never thought hawaii would be so cold."
noah represents an ideal for majima that he has aspired to his whole life: innocence. this is why he is inspired by noah. the "method" of inspiration in question that majima had been lacking comes to him in the form of a person. and it had to be a person, because majima has always been inspired by individuals. and not only majima, either. RGG as a series is full of examples of this.
It is only through things and individual beings on this earth that human love can penetrate to that which lies beyond.
it's our connections to individuals that remind us of our obligations towards every human being. love becomes universal through the particular. weil understood the important part love plays in motivating people to change. it was her answer to how to grow roots again â her answer to the question of how to inspire people.
it is precisely this form of inspiration that majima had been deprived of for decades, especially after the dissolution as he'd sunk into depression. and this was always the solution, but there were several obstacles to it prior to this game:
he could not afford to have personal human connections in his life, even after the dissolution. he'd learned the hard way what happens when he "dares to show a modicum of emotion," as scott strichart put it.
as long as he was still relying the same tools, he could not effectively change his methods. this game forced him to do that by taking away his favorite tool: mad dog.
even if he wanted to use his violence only for the right things, he had obligations to the clan that would have him using that tool for less-than-noble ends.
because of this, even after the dissolution, he was stuck in the cycle between honor and punishment which obfuscated the truth and confused him. and there can be no inspiration without access to truth.
all of these problems were imposed on him by the social order he was part of â namely, the yakuza. this is why its dissolution was a necessary prerequisite to majima's "growth", but it was still not enough on its own. the amnesia was the second prerequisite.
he needed to face his past, but for that to help him in any way, he first needed to be inspired, so that he could look back on events with a new perspective. and the amnesia was the prerequisite for the inspiration, because it reduced the weight of his guilt and thus his need for punishment, breaking the honor-punishment cycle.
what this game is for majima is an exit. it's an exit from the emotional and spiritual exile he's imposed on himself, that the yakuza has imposed on him, and the self-alienation he's suffered because of it. amnesia is what it takes for him to be reunited with himself. he had to forget who he is so he could be who he is. such was the extent of his self-betrayal.
within the space provided him by this exit, there is room for change. transformation. for majima, that means changing his methods. this game is addressing a problem he's been aware of for decades but could not do anything about.
some examples of him facing his past with this new perspective:
he's realizing what he was to these people, who looked up to him, who he allowed to look up to him, who he took upon himself to lead â and he's hating what he sees. he doesn't like his methods. and he's running from the responsibility of doing right by them, refusing saejima when he asks him to go back.
he's afraid of facing how much he's failed his subordinates by his own standards â a reality he'd lived with for decades before his amnesia. the fact that we actually see how much it bothers him in this game is invaluable, because it means he's letting himself acknowledge that. he can no longer rely on the lie (justification) he had been telling himself to sustain this self betrayal. he is disillusioned with his own pragmatism. noah has exposed the lie, and he allowed it to be exposed. he is now ready to take right and wrong into consideration when deciding his methods â all because noah has reminded him of his obligations in a way that commands his attention, in a way he can't turn away from, and because he no longer has to sacrifice his soul to the clan. this game is, effectively, undoing the spiritual death he had undergone.
he's outright calling his old self, his old ideas, his old methods, "dumb as shit." majima is reinventing his identity, his reputation, his presence in the world and his connection to it. he's been given a chance to become someone he can be proud of again â this is why he likes the way noah looks at him, why he doesn't want to give up on it. it motivates him to commit to his transformation instead of wallowing in guilt like he was in infinite wealth.
he's getting to do it all over again with noah in a way he himself actually approves of, with a clear conscience. not just because noah is a kid, not just because he's lost his memory, not just because he's not yakuza anymore, but because of all those things in combination. that is to say, none of these factors are arbitrary. they were each necessary for achieving this state for majima â a state where change is possible, and he is inspired to change.
"captain majima" is someone he can be proud of.
he rejects his legacy as a yakuza completely. this goes as far as rejecting his bond with saejima. he doesn't want to be called "kyoudai" by him, he'll only answer to "captain." as he's coming to terms with how much it went against his nature to be yakuza, he's trying to distance himself from it as much as possible.
but he's running. he's not trying to run from his responsibilities to the yakuza like saejima thinks â he's running from owning up to his legacy. this is why he pretends to still not have his memories back when shigaki confronts him.
but it's not just the yakuza: the nebulous entity that told them that. it's what majima told them. it's what majima built his legend around.
yakuza 0 was not a game of positive character development for majima. it was the story of how and why he learned to betray himself. it was the origin story of his justification, his nihilism. it was the birth of mad dog. and this game is the counterpart to that â the death of mad dog.
One of the indispensable foods of the human soul is LIBERTY. Liberty, taking the word in its concrete sense, consists in the ability to choose.
the mad dog legend wasn't something that majima stumbled upon against his will like kiryu's dragon of the dojima legend. majima built this. he wanted this. he was trying to rise in the ranks (for saejima), and his legend is what it is because he was so, so wary of being taken advantage of. not only out of his own need for liberty, but out of the obligation he feels towards everyone else. this is the price of turning yourself into a weapon: you have to be very, very careful who you allow to wield you, and towards what end. that becomes your responsibility.
this was why majima was apologetic in that y5 scene â he had failed to prevent kurosawa from using him, and he understands that it is his responsibility to prevent that. this is why the mad dog legend is what it is. he had to find a way to "tear his leash" so that no one could wield him.
but his own preoccupation with freedom, his fear of being used by others, this fight he's been fighting against himself for decades has made him a bad role model. he's finally facing that, and not only that, but he is remedying it, too.
his own unhealthy treatment of himself, his own betrayal of himself, has done actual harm to others. his own misjudgment has led people who looked up to him astray. and he should've known better. done better, been more.
he should've been the one inspiring his subordinates, he should've been the one reminding them of their obligations. instead he has created a legend that has done just the opposite. a legend that has given people another excuse to deny their obligations. because that legend was born out of majima's own excuse for denying his own obligations. THAT is majima's failure. he has failed others in the exact same way he has failed himself. it could not have turned out any other way.
he has failed as a leader, as a patriarch and he's acknowledging that. but that on its own doesn't do much in the way of helping him. this game is about majima stepping up to not only hold himself accountable, which he already HAS been doing, but to do something about it. holding yourself accountable for mistakes you just continue to make or cannot begin to make up for is the very definition of being stagnant. this is the "state more or less resembling death, more or less akin to a purely vegetative existence" he was in for pretty much the entirety of the series, reaching its peak in infinite wealth when he had been cut off from all means of effectively taking responsibility.
and he is finally being given the opportunity to take responsibility â a vital need. he is being given the opportunity to undo the damage, to guide them towards a better path, to remind them of their obligations. just like kiryu.
majima, in true kiryu fashion, is telling these people exactly what he himself needs to hear â needed to hear, and that noah made him realize the moment they met. he is being given a second chance. an opportunity to redeem himself, to START redeeming himself. start over. and he's paying the same kindness forward. if it's not too late to for him to start doing the right thing, then it isn't too late for shigaki either, and vice versa.
[...] man has the power of turning his attention and love towards it. Nothing can ever justify the assumption that any man, whoever he may be, has been deprived of this power. [...] The sole condition for exercising it is consent.
majima understands this, and he understands that applying this principle to shigaki necessitates that he apply it to himself also. a person can always, always choose to do good â not only that, they are compelled to at all times. it takes energy to resist it. this was what caused his burnout in y5 and arguably y4 before that.
this game is about majima taking responsibility for his legacy as a yakuza, much like kiryu did in infinite wealth. this is what they're using his amnesia for. a story about him wallowing in guilt or trying to fulfill his need for punishment would have been the opposite of growth for majima, because the whole problem was that his method of trying to achieve personal growth through honor and punishment had not been working for him. a radically new approach was required. you can't fix something with the same tools that broke it.
just as his own neglect of his needs had caused the problem, the solution also comes from fulfilling those needs for himself. he has to stop betraying himself in order to make things right with the people he's failed. to take responsibility, he has to give up mad dog.
this does not necessarily mean giving up violence, but it does mean using it as a tool for ends that do not conflict his needs. a good example of this is the scene where he threatens to cut fingers.
it's his last resort, not his first one. he is being given room for that now. it's important to note here that he is not threatening to cut fingers to punish someone for insubordination as he has done his entire life â instead it's in the name of ensuring cooperation between others (a noble goal), for something he has no personal stake in. he doesn't want any of the money, he refuses to take a cut of it. he is not playing the antagonist here, and he is very open about his intentions unlike the "old" majima goro who obscured his intentions at every turn for the sake of playing the antagonist.
y0 was the last time we saw majima so earnest, because it was y0 that taught him not to be earnest. this game is undoing the damage.
[...] complete, unlimited freedom of expression for every sort of opinion, without the least restriction or reserve, is an absolute need on the part of the intelligence. It follows from this that it is a need of the soul, for when the intelligence is ill-at-ease the whole soul is sick.
sure, he didn't hold his tongue against his superiors, we've seen him do it countless times throughout the series. but to be able to openly express his goals, his intentions, his own judgment and act accordingly is a previously unthinkable mode of living for majima.
once again, it's about methods, and this game IS the difference between methods, especially as it concerns communication.
it's the difference between "if adults like us are good for anything, it should be nurturing that hope" and "keep that up, and it'll break you." him establishing himself as an ally, instead of an antagonist. he has played the antagonist his entire life, because it was the only way he could think to fulfill his obligations, but the world doesn't need more antagonists. and he's been failing not only his subordinates or himself, but kiryu and everyone else he loves as well.
this is what this scene in infinite wealth was about. majima's methods are destructive, not only to everyone he cares about, but also to himself â because there is no difference between those things. such is the nature of love.

majima finally, finally gets to play the hero after a lifetime of playing the antagonist. he's taking the leaf out of kiryu's book that he couldn't until this point, that he so admired kiryu for. it's a dream come true for him â maybe the oldest one he had.
and in some ways, this is also majima carrying on kiryu's dream, by applying the lessons he learned from him. by emulating him, he's honoring kiryu's principles. he'd told him, all the way back in 1995, that he'd "see those ideals of his to the end." well, this is what that looks like in its most effective form.
this ending really says it all, in my opinion, because it's majima looking at the journey and finding joy in that instead of the end goal. for ONCE in his life. maybe for the first time in his life. because for the first time he is ABLE to do that. for the first time there is something to enjoy about the journey. he is so unconcerned with results here that he doesn't even take the money.
he has been so, so preoccupied with reaching his goals that he has sacrificed the journey, the "methods" and betrayed himself in the process his whole life. this is where it stops.
[...] honour has to do with a human being considered not simply as such, but from the point of view of his social surroundings.
i think it's fair to say that his new methods and outlook on life are here to stay.
conclusion
this game is no joke. it's the most beautiful and profound thing they've done with majima... ever.
to be honest, whether or not most of this should be called "growth" is debatable â i think it can be said instead, more accurately, that growth was not the point of this game. the point of this game and how significant the things it does for majima lie beyond "growth". its value comes from the fact that it fulfills needs for majima that he had not been able to for decades.
majima's problem was not that he needed growing. his problem was that he had been in spiritual exile for 40 years. pirate yakuza was not just "upbeat", it was a celebration of majima being reunited with his soul. and as any celebration ought to be, it was joyful and inspiring. the light tone of the game is not because it is lacking in depth, but because the nature of the subject matter lends itself to hope more than anything else.

a game that was conceptualized as an infinite wealth gaiden had to deal with these themes. to tie the loose end that is majima, so to speak â to give a satisfying conclusion to his arc we'd been observing for years. just as infinite wealth was about kiryu's relationship to the yakuza, this game is about majima's relationship to the yakuza and the yakuza's relationship to him. it cannot be thought of separately from infinite wealth and what it was for kiryu. pirate yakuza and infinite wealth are the yin and yang to each other, just as majima and kiryu are to each other. majima has always been, before and above all else, a narrative foil to kiryu. this game is no exception, they're just changing how they're exploring that in the narrative. it's almost like an inversion of what the series has done with the two of them so far, but still united in one theme above all else: hope for the future.
whether or not these themes have been done justice in execution is entirely up to you to decide, so you can still be disappointed with how the game dealt with them â after all, a method still has to be effective to be a good one â but i hope i have been able to give you some perspective on what this game accomplishes with majima as a character.
thanks for reading <3
#i want to note also that the 'got a reputation to protect' line is 'who do you think i am?' in japanese#pirate yakuza in hawaii#majima goro#yakuza#ryu ga gotoku#if anyones made it this far: you are so so brave for reading all of this and i love you#tldr: if youve ever been like 'majima needs to go to therapy'. this game is it#they fixed majima. they did it#my analysis#majeem#majima gaiden#dont ask me the word count of this post btw. i checked. its. not good
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Yuri and Nightfall were both created for somewhat the same purpose. Characters just to add chaos and tension in the Forger's dynamic. For that reason their entire identity was formed around a specific Forger. In a similar sense, Emile and Ewen also existed as auxiliary characters to Damian not much individuality assigned to either.
Normally, these types of characters would be bound to these minor roles and never grow independent of the other characters. Instead, in the last three chapters, we see an intentional effort on Endo's side to continue their growth and development into individuals.
Emile and Ewen started as little echoes for Damian, following him around like tiny mindless goons. Now, although they still exist as a duo and their role is still very tied to Damian, they are shown to have a genuine relationship with him. They're not just in it for the clout, Damian is their friend and they truly care about him and all his flaws.
Nightfall and Yuri are obviously more complicated.
Yuri has a very troubled relationship with his sister. Their shared past resulted in him being very codependent on her and building his entire identity and sense of purpose around her. Now that his sister is married and moved on (i will not expand on that), he is left feeling like an empty shell of himself. He now is a position where he has to find a new sense of purpose while also questioning the choices that he has made throughout his life for the sake of his sister.


The chapter ends with him accepting that his sister is happy and there is nothing more he can do for her, that their lives have forever changed and they cant go back to the way it was. Their home is in the city now and he has to come to terms with what that means for their relationship. In the end, he decides to go out with his coworkers and try to live a little, outside of sister.

Not much is known about Nightfall. Her motives are still ambiguous and defined around Twilight. I have my own personal explanation but the canon still dances around the topic. While her past is still ambiguous, her present circumstances are clear. She is very devoted to Twilight to the point where she routinely risks her health for his sake. She has this idea that for him to love her she needs to be absolutely perfect and should never show any weakness. A moment I found funny was when she needs to cough and blow her nose but refused to do it in front of Twilight. Reminds me of a short story I read for one of my classes, Bride by Cheerie Jones.

So much of what Jones described as the perfect wife is the same things Nightfall tries to do to gain the romantic attention of Twilight. It also shows why she resents Yor because beyond the fact that she has Twilight she doesn't have to be perfect for him. Yor rattles everything that Nightfall believes about herself and again leaves her feeling empty and confused. Again, there is some optimism to her story. Seeing that Twilight still cares for her even when she is not perfect, that his concern for her is not contingent on her being perfect. She is finally able to rest and recover once he leaves her with that simple expression of concern.


I don't know what motivates her or why she specifically craves Twilight's affection but my most optimistic theory is that he represents someone that she wants. Someone who cares for her. Twilight does care for so I am guessing her drive is less to get his care but to preserve it and earn it. She is just seeking his validation the best way she knows how.

#spy x family#sxf#loid forger#twilight#yor forger#anya forger#sxf spoilers#sxf analysis#yuri briar#fiona frost#nightfall#agent nightfall#sxf nightfall#when they link up realise they dont need to live for anyone but themselves fall in love and run away together yasss#yuriona#i ship them but i also they'll be good friends too#i feel like Twilight's experience with anya is actually whats making him softer with nightfall#proof? i said so fuck you
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Look, Vergil is my favorite character of all time, but to excuse his actions just cuz you like him is genuinely dumb.
The creator of the netflix dmc show (Adi Shankar) is on twitter making posts about âVergil was rightâ âhes too powerful to care about child supportâ or my least favorite thing heâs said:

THE FUCK YOU MEAN PROTECTING THE UNIVERSE FROM COLLAPSE??? WHAT DO YOU MEAN HE WAS THINKING ABOUT âreuniting the Sparda bloodlineâ HE WAS NOT THINKING ABOUT THAT AT ALL!!!!
Vergils flaws are what make him an interesting character, his main flaw is that heâs so motivated by fear that he canât think about anything else. He canât move past what happened to him when he was eight.
Vergil caused mass deaths of innocent life in both 3 and 5. He was too focused on gaining power to consider or care the amount of people that would die in the crossfire. Itâs not like he went out of his way to kill people he just didnât care if people did die.
The entire reason Dante wants to fight Vergil at the end of 3 and in 5 is because he wants to stop him. âMy soul⊠is telling me to stop you!â Yâall glance over this quote from 3 too much. âSoulâ in the context of dmc3 clearly refers to the characters goals and morals, clearly. So Dante saying his soul wants to stop Vergil is clearly because of his character development in 3 and learning to care about humanity, he doesnât want Vergil doing these things that cause human death.
Vergil doesnât just cause the deaths of a few people here and there you do realize that right??? When he raised the temen ni gru in 3 and when he grew the qliphoth tree, A LOT OF PEOPLE DIED. Way more in 5 than in 3, in 5 we get to actually see civilians get murdered too.
Vergil is NOT a good person. He does NOT care about protecting innocent people he doesnât know. Vergil only thinks about his own fears and trauma since he is so blinded by it. Heâs never been a good person. Also, just because someone is super powerful doesnât mean their better than others, thatâs the most dudebro power-scaling bullshit Iâve heard in my life.
Also a reminder that Vergil had no idea that Nero existed, but considering heâs âabandonmentâ as a child and being forced to learn to protect himself and having the quote of âWithout power you cannot protect anything.â I think itâs safe to assume that of he did know Nero existed he would both protect him and teach him to protect himself, he wouldnât willingly abandon his own child unless he thought Nero would be better off that way. I donât know how anyone could see that differently.
#dmc#devil may cry#vergil#dmc vergil#dante dmc#dmc dante#netflix dmc#devil may cry vergil#dante devil may cry#vergil devil may cry#devil may cry dante#dmc nero#nero dmc#nero devil may cry#devil may cry nero#character analysis#vampy rambles yet again no one is surprised
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Nothing Has Changed - 15
Summary: Returning home for peace, you're faced with your tormentor, Bucky Barnes, who is now involved in your family's business.
Character: Bucky Barnes
Warning: Angst, Tragedy.
Author Note: From the last poll, the series that you want to see updated is this one. I hope you enjoy this update.
Nothing Has Changed - Series Masterlist
Main Masterlist || support: Ko-fi
Thank you to anyone who gave a like, reblog, and left a comment. It motivated me to write more. đđđ
âJust like your father. Dishonest to the core,â Lydia sneered, her eyes narrowing as she glared at Bucky.
He exhaled sharply, folding his arms. âHow could he ever marry you? And how did I end up with a mother like you?â
Without warning, Lydia snatched up the magazine and flung it at him. Bucky moved effortlessly, dodging the flying object with ease. âYou threw me in jail, and now you disrespect me? I canât believe this is my life,â she spat, her voice seething with resentment.
Bucky sighed, but there was no sympathy in his eyes. He walked over to the coffee table and sat down on the edge, directly facing her. His movements were calm, controlled, but Lydia could sense something had shifted in her sonâsomething dangerous.
He raised three fingers slowly, holding them in front of her. âThree times,â he said coldly, his voice steady and low. âIf you push me past three, Iâll send you back to jail. And from what I hear, the food there does wonders for your diet.â
Lydiaâs face twisted with rage, her jaw clenched so tight that her teeth ground together. She stood abruptly, practically trembling with fury, but she said nothing. Instead, she shot him a glare, turned on her heel, and stormed out of the room, her footsteps echoing loudly as she left.
Bucky watched her go, his jaw tense, his hands tightening into fists. The room was quiet again, but inside, his thoughts were turbulent. How did it come to this? How did everything get so twisted?
For years, he had been blindâblind to the lies, the manipulation, the way his mother had used him as a pawn in her schemes. He had fought to protect her, fought for a family that had never truly existed. Now, he saw her clearly, and the bitter truth burned like acid in his veins.
đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„
The situation in your house wasnât much better. Despite Tomâs insistence that he was fine, you could still see the tension in his eyes, the way his hands fidgeted, unable to relax. His panic lingered beneath the surface, though he kept trying to mask it with forced smiles and shallow breaths.
Then your phone rang. The screen lit up with a nameâAlan, Harlanâs oncologist. You took a steadying breath before answering.
"Hello, Iâm sorry I just saw your text," Alan's voice crackled through.
âItâs alright, I know youâre busy,â you replied, trying to keep your voice calm even though your mind was racing.
âThatâs true, I barely get enough sleep. Iâm really sorry about your father,â Alan offered.
âThank you,â you murmured. âDid you see the photo I sent?â
âI did. From the photo alone, I canât tell exactly whatâs in the pill. But one thing did catch my attention,â Alan said, his tone shifting slightly.
Your grip on the phone tightened. âThe doctorâs name?â
âYes,â Alan confirmed. âTony Stark. Iâm really surprised heâs practicing again, considering everything.â
Your heart began to pound, a sudden unease creeping in. âWhat did Tony do?â
Alan sighed on the other end. âHeâs been involved in some serious controversies. He offered treatments to patients who didnât need themâovercharging, committing insurance fraud, manipulating patients for financial gain.â
Tony Stark? You felt a chill run down your spine. You glanced toward your fatherâs bedroom, your thoughts spiraling. Could Tom have been misdiagnosed?
âAlan, what if my fatherâs been misdiagnosed?â you asked, your voice barely above a whisper.
âIf I were you, Iâd get a second opinion immediately,â Alan advised, his tone firm. âCome to my clinic anytime. Iâll personally check on your father, and bring his medication with you.â
You exhaled in relief, trying to steady your shaking hands. âThank you, Alan. I really appreciate it.â
He chuckled lightly. âItâs my pleasure. After all, you and Harlan helped grow my portfolio quite a bit.â
You forced a smile, though it didnât reach your eyes. âThanks again. Would tomorrow work?â
âOf course. Anytime,â Alan replied before you both wrapped up the call.
Quietly, you moved toward your fatherâs bedroom door. You eased it open just a crack, peeking inside. There was Tom, frail and fragile, a shadow of the man you once knew. Is this really cancer, or has he been subjected to unnecessary treatment? The question hung heavy in your mind, twisting your stomach.
The next morning, you stood by the car, loading a suitcase into the trunk. The air was tense, and Tom, leaning against the doorframe of the house, still looked uncertain. He shifted his weight from one foot to the other, clearly hesitant.
âDaughter,â he started, his voice wavering. âOur doctor is good. He has so many certificates and awardsâŠâ
You gently led him toward the passenger seat, your hand firm but comforting on his shoulder. âHaving certificates and awards doesnât mean the diagnosis and treatment are 100% right, Dad. If that were all it took to be a doctor, everyone would be cured,â you said softly but firmly.
Tom sighed, unable to argue. He nodded and got into the car, his hands fumbling with the seatbelt. It dawned on him then that this was the first time heâd ever been in your car, the first road trip heâd ever taken with you.
After making sure everything was packed and ready, you moved toward the driverâs seat. Just as you reached for the door handle, a familiar sound caught your attentionâthe low hum of a car engine. You turned to see Buckyâs car pulling up to the driveway. He parked hastily and stepped out quickly, his face a mixture of curiosity and concern.
âWhere are you going?â he asked, his gaze flickering between you and your father.
You didnât meet his eyes, not wanting to reveal the real reason. âJust a road trip,â you said with a casual shrug. âI realized I never had that moment with my father.â
Bucky studied you for a moment, his expression unreadable. But then he nodded. âAlright. Safe trip, guys,â he said, his voice softening. âIâll take care of the house while youâre gone.â
âThank you,â you responded, offering him a small, appreciative smile before slipping into the driverâs seat.
As you drove away, you glanced in the rearview mirror. Bucky stood there, watching your car disappear down the road, his figure growing smaller in the distance. There was something in his eyesâsomething he wasnât saying. You couldnât quite place it, but it lingered in your thoughts as you drove farther from the house, from him.
đ„đ„đ„đ„đ„
You and Tom entered the clinic, immediately struck by how different it was from the small-town hospital you were used to. The walls were pristine, the furniture modern and sleek, and the air felt fresher, almost too clean. Tom's eyes darted around, taking it all in.
âThis place looks expensive,â he muttered under his breath, clearly uneasy.
Without looking up from the magazine you were idly flipping through, you gave a small smile. âIt is. This doctor has treated presidents, actresses, athletes. Heâs the best weâve got,â you said casually, letting that sink in.
Tomâs eyes widened a bit at the thought. He glanced at you, as if seeing you in a new light. You had really gotten far since leaving that small townâmuch further than heâd realized.
Moments later, a nurse walked into the waiting area with a clipboard in hand. "Tom L/N?" she called, scanning the room.
Tom stiffened, his grip tightening on the arm of his chair. He shot you a quick, uncertain glance, and you gave him a reassuring nod. Slowly, he stood, and the two of you followed the nurse down the hallway.
When you stepped into the examination room, a tall man with kind, tired eyes and graying hair stood to greet you both. His demeanor was professional but friendly.
âTom, Y/N, good to meet you,â Alan said warmly, offering a handshake to both of you. âIâve heard a bit about your situation.â
Tom shook his hand, though his movements were stiff. âLikewise,â Tom muttered, still unsure of the whole process.
Alan motioned for Tom to sit on the examination table. "Let's take a look," he said, adjusting his stethoscope and carefully examining Tom. His hands were gentle but thorough as he checked Tom's vitals. âYouâre quite underweight,â Alan noted with a concerned frown, pulling back to look at Tom. âWe need to work on building your strength up. Itâs critical.â
Tom forced a weak smile, clearly uncomfortable with the attention. He shifted in his seat, his eyes darting away as he spoke. âYeah, well⊠havenât had much of an appetite lately.â He hadnât expected this doctor to be concerned about his weight; Alan was different from Tony.
Alan paused, his eyes narrowing slightly as he took in Tom's condition. He placed a hand on Tomâs shoulder, his tone growing serious. âWeâre going to do some testsâa scan, maybe a biopsy, to see whatâs really going on. Youâll need to stay here for a while so we can monitor you.â
Tom looked uneasy, shifting on the examination table. He shrugged, then pointed toward you. âSheâs in charge of all that. I trust her judgment.â
You smiled back at him, though your mind was racing. âWhatever you think is best, Doctor. We just want to get to the bottom of this.â
Alan nodded approvingly. âGood. Iâll have the nurse set everything up. In the meantime, weâll make sure Tom gets the nutrition he needs.â
As the nurse came to escort Tom to the next room, you stayed behind with Alan. The atmosphere between you shifted immediately, the conversation taking on a more serious tone. You reached into your bag and handed Alan the collection of medication bottles your father had been taking.
Alanâs brows furrowed as he sifted through them, clearly surprised. "All of these?" he asked, raising an eyebrow.
âYeah,â you replied, your voice low, a tightness in your chest. Youâd had the same reaction the first time you saw the sheer number of pills.
Alan shook his head in disbelief, turning a bottle over in his hands. âThis is way too much for anyone to be on,â he muttered. âIâll send these to the lab for analysis. We need to know exactly what heâs been taking.â
You swallowed hard, nodding. "I donât trust his diagnosis anymore, Doctor. What if⊠what if heâs been misdiagnosed?"
Alan looked at you seriously, setting the bottles down. âItâs possible. With the medications heâs been prescribed, there are a lot of red flags. Especially with what you mentioned about Dr. Stark.â
Your pulse quickened at the mention of that name. "If there's any chance my fatherâs been given something unnecessary⊠or worse, something harmful, I need to know."
âWeâll find out soon,â Alan reassured you, his voice steady. âBut in the meantime, weâre going to focus on getting Tom back to a healthy place. Heâs too frail right now, and we need to get him stabilized.â
You nodded, feeling a knot of anxiety loosening slightly. "So, what's the next step?"
"Tom will need to stay here for observation. Weâll run a few more tests and adjust his diet to get him stronger. You can visit him anytime, but donât forget to take care of yourself too," Alan said, giving you a kind but pointed look.
đ„đ„đ„đ„
Later, after Tom was settled in and you knew he was in good hands, you found yourself wandering through the bustling city streets. The towering buildings and fast pace of city life made you feel small, but your mind kept drifting back to the clinic.
It's only been a few months, but already the city felt different. New cafés and restaurants had popped up, their signs gleaming with fresh paint. The pace of change was unsettling, and as you walked, memories of a quieter, more familiar place tugged at your thoughts.
Suddenly, you remembered the art gallery that had hired Steve. It wasnât far from where you were, so you hailed a taxi, the ride feeling both quick and too slow as your mind wandered. Steve had always found solace in his artâmaybe seeing his work would bring you some peace too.
When you arrived at the gallery, the soft hum of conversation and the faint smell of paint welcomed you. You moved through the exhibits, eyes catching on familiar brushstrokes. There it wasâSteveâs painting. You paused, staring at the delicate lines, the vibrant colors. It felt like him, a piece of him still lingering on the canvas.
As you stood there, lost in thought, the gallery owner approached with a friendly smile. "Enjoying the collection?" they asked, their tone polite but cautious.
You nodded, still admiring Steve's work. "Yes, especially this one. Steve Rogersâhe's incredible."
The gallery ownerâs expression faltered, their eyes darkening with something you couldnât quite place. "Iâm sorry to be the one to tell you this⊠Steve was in an accident."
The world seemed to slow, your breath catching in your throat. âWhat?â you managed, voice barely above a whisper.
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#bucky barnes x reader#bucky x you#bucky barnes x y/n#bucky barnes#bucky x y/n#bucky x reader#bucky barnes au#james bucky buchanan barnes#james bucky barnes#buckybarnes#bucky barnes fanfic#bucky barnes fanfiction#bucky barnes x you#winter soldier#the winter soldier#marvel au#marvel x reader#bucky fanfic#james buchanan barnes
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MLS6 Sublimation
An analysis of Marinette's behavior/reactions (by request) Salt-Free.
This post is in response to an ask, because tumblr ate that reply and posts save drafts!
The ask was in regards to my statement in another post that Marinette's actions were a 'control' move, asking me to clarify what that meant. I'm going to break it down here, referencing (but not quoting I do not have transcripts) on screen statements and behaviors
The goal is explaining, not vilifying.
I don't blame anyone for missing some of this, the messaging was very muddled in this episode and you could easily lose things in Marinette's breakneck word-vomit as well as some mixed messaging later in the episode.
You can break down Marinette's behavior re:Sublime like this:
Motivation:Fear
Response:Control
Tool:Friendship.
Early on we establish that Marinette is afraid. She's 'not jealous'(she claims) but she very much is catastrophizing. She envisions Adrien liking Sublime better than her and deciding to go out with her. We'll put a pin in this for later but for our purposes now this admits her emotion: She is afraid.
Her response to this fear is an attempt to gain a level of control over the situation. If she has control, she doesn't need to be afraid!(She thinks) She goes right back into her (worst) habits of the previous seasons. She gathers intel, follows/stalks/spies on people, and forms elaborate plans.
All of these are bent to trying to befriend Sublime- but friendship isn't the real motivation, just the tool. I have no doubt Marinette would like to be friends with Sublime bit in this instance that is not *why* she is going to these lengths. Marinette believes if she is Sublime's friend that somehow she(Sublime) won't want to date Adrien, or maybe just that Marinette could spot anything forming and head it off. -She will have more control.
And that's it really. I'm not going to dig into Marinette's specific behaviors as I think they were done 'for the show' you *could* make the final talk with Sublime into being a control move too (guilt/pity so that Sublime would feel bad 'stealing' Adrien) but I think that was more about shoehorning in a 'lesson' while not wanting to address the lesson set up at the start(for unknown reasons)
Now I am going to get into *why* what Marinette is doing is actually worse than what she has done before. If you can't stomach even a well intentioned critique of our protagonist, this is your warning.
In Sublimation Marinette is treating Adrien as an *object*. From the very beginning her fear discounts his agency. Marinette us afraid Sublime will be better and so Adrien will leave. It's 1+1 to her.
The fact that Adrien has openly and repeatedly professed his love for her doesn't seem to weigh for anything. Are we to assume her own love is so mercenary? If someone just slightly 'better' than Adrien came along, would she jump ship? I'd like to think not.
Now, this is a common (and very tired) romance trope, but it is one that needs to die, and it feeds poorly into Marinette's other behaviors. It also shows a regression. It was one thing to worry that an Adrien who she wasn't dating, who hadn't told her he loved her, might be wooed by someone else amazing(Kagami). It is something else entirely to consider him fickle and a mere creature to be dazzled by a new and shiny thing.
Her approach -inserting herself into Adrien's friendship- also disregards his autonomy. Her little 'my future friends' speech might seem cute, but with the knowledge of her fear and the lengths she goes to, it is clear- Adrien can't have female friends who Marinette doesn't have an eye on.
A healthy response is to wait to be introduced. It is good to have friends who are 'yours' outside of who you are in a relationship. Each party should know people who are not beholden to the other.
If she couldn't wait(which we will allow for, anxiety exists) ask to be introduced. Keeping Adrien in the loop and letting him have agency in the hows, whens, and ifs of things is still reasonably reapectful.
Going behind his back to forge a connection without his involvement and 'usurp' the friendship is is just flatly unhealthy. Yes Adrien makes light of it, but this is the abused boy who has been told the person who abused him was a hero. His ideas about autonomy and self-worth are a bit sketchy at the moment.
This is not all to say Marinette is a 'bad person'. It *is* to say what she is doing here is bad, top to bottom. Marinette behaved terribly in this episode. Do not do anything remotely resembling what she did. Do not take away any of her justifications as valid. They are the same logic that an alcoholic uses to say 'Just one won't hurt'.
Here's to hoping this particular arc of Marinette's journey ends quickly. It feels like a real step back for her.
#miraculous ladybug#marinette dupain cheng#ml sublimation#ml sublimation spoilers#ml analysis#in response to an ask
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You don't need to worry about the ATSV fandom dying. As someone whose been in the Marvel fandom over ten years - I can assure you this is natural.
The ATSV Fandom Isn't Dead: A brief look into the science of fandoms.


[me standing beside Hobie beaming my thoughts of love and adoration into his head like I'm professor x]
A lot of people are afraid of the ATSV dying - and I don't blame them.
In the era of shows releasing all in one day, or movies coming to streaming almost immediately - it's not hard to say we're in an era were content is consumed at ridiculously rapid rates.
I mean, this time last year Wednesday was breaking records on Netflix. Where's the hype now?
I know you see it too, there's less posts everyday in the Hobie tag, less screenshot breakdowns, etc etc etc.
But I'm here to tell you - The ATSV fandom is doing just fine. Better than fine. All of this is meant to happen.
Let me put it into perspective.
ATSV released on June 2nd - it's November.
ATSV released a little over six months ago.
For reference: The Avengers (2012) was released on May 4th.
The Avengers DVD wasn't available for purchase until SEPTEMBER 25th - almost SIX months later.
The time that the Hobie fandom has formed and existed - is the same amount of time people had to wait just to see The Avengers again.
Large periods of time where tags only get three posts a day TOPS was nothing to fear. xReaders and fanfics held the fandom over until the next trailer, the next sneak peek or leak.
Prior to the release of streaming, only a little more than ten years ago - it was NATURAL for a fandom to wait six months before even seeing the movie for a second time.
And mind you - streaming didn't exist. If you wanted to see The Avengers again, you had to go out and BUY it. $26.99.
If you wanted to order it online - you'd have to get it shipped to you. Before Disney plus, we watched on BlueRay Discs.
And the fandom was fine and healthy.
If a fandom that doesn't even have a DVD release can keep up content for six months, I think we'll be fine.
But I'll admit - there's still the question:
If the ATSV fandom is 'doing fine' then where is everyone going? Why are the tags getting slower?
The answer is simple:
FANDOM BIOLOGY
I LOVE social sciences and the systems people create and how they work - even unintentionally.
And I have a theory - one about the natural evolution and regeneration of fandom. Hear me out -
When it comes to ATSV:
We are leaving the Analysation Phase, the phase in which content creation is centered around deciphering and breaking down the most recent installment in the fandom.
During this phase usually see art of newer characters, new ships, meta breakdowns, easter egg point-outs.
We were in that phase.
Once the Analysation Phase dies down, usually main content creators may remain. The intermediate or liminal period.
The intermediate is usually when you'll see more x-reader art pop-up, the levels of fanart evening out as artists return to their favorite characters - usually incorporating any new ones they gained from the last installment.
Shitposts usually also become popular around this time, as the shock and weight of the story wear off, and we're more able to joke about the storyline a lot more light-heartedly.
That's why the intermediate point is often see as the passion 'dying out'.
When in fact, it is the fandom getting comfortable. Resting for the next phase.
And after a few months, the next phase comes:
The Speculation Phase:
The Speculation Phase cannot come until the Analysation Phase is over.
During the Analysation Phase the fandom begins to breakdown and digest the writers intentions. They integrate the new character into the story, and the fandom.
As the audience and fandom talk amongst each other, we get more solid ideas of who the characters are, what their motivations might be, and most important of all-
What they might do.
In the Speculation Phase we turn from the last installment - and start looking towards the future.
Let's take Hobie for example.
Looking at the timeline of the Hobie fandom, we can see a progression.
Originally taken as a punk-rockstar and little more, throughout the months the fandom began posting things about punk culture, the 70's, Hobie's motivation in the comics, and how that all correlates to him.
As the fandom analyzed, the collective zeitgeist and understanding of Hobie grew into something a lot more sound, and telling.
We looked at the parellels he provides in the story, and what kind of person he is.
And because if that we have seen a marked improvement in people's contextual understanding of Hobie - as a punk and a hero.
And now that we can understand him - we can predict him.
The same goes for Miguel - over the months, a lot of us have began to question if we know him as well as we think we do , if we really know the kinda person he is -
And if we really know what he's doing to do.
That's where the Speculation Phase comes in.
The Speculation Phase in fandom is when we see some of the most passion - and instead of tapering off overtime, it builds. More and more until the next release.
The Speculation Phase is when the fandom takes the analysis' and from there, they begin to theorize.
Now that we understand, we can begin to predict.
And this is arguably one of the most interesting parts in a fandoms natural ecosystem.
During the Speculation Phase, we can see a number of diverse opinions appear.
As more and more creators begin to gather their understanding, tips from the writers, new released news, and past comic book arcs, we start to see dozens of triguing paths the writers can take us on.
As more news releases, the more hype people get. I mean - imagine how you'll feel when they release the first new poster of Hobie, or Miles? Or when we get to see Miles.G in the trailer?
And with each new poster, or trailer, we're given clues. The theorizes develop more. And the plot thickens.
It's all natural.
So I can understand the fear. Only getting one or two new posts when you visit the Hobie tag can be a bummer. But it's natural and it's GOOD.
Y'all, we need to conserve our energy. We are in the liminal phase. And they never last long.
With the news of the voice actors back in the studio, and a cliff-hanger like we have - I can assure you, it's only a matter of time before we begin to see the theories, the trailer breakdowns, the people guessing what Miguel might do, or exactly how much tech Hobie is hiding.
And when that time comes we need to be READY. I can already feel it on the horizon.
I really wonder what they'll do with all that left over Hobie concept art.
Plus with explosion of Hobie approval, I wonder if they'll add him in even more. Hobie fan-service anyone?
Hmmm...
But chill y'all, we're on the right track -

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If you read this far, as always THANK YOU SO MUCH!! And as a token of my appreciation, I hand you this Hobie. Hold him gently please


Bye đ
#no proofread ever ever EVER#spiderman#atsv#spider man#marvel#across the spiderverse#hobie brown#spider punk#spiderpunk#Miles morales#miguel o'hara#miguel ohara#peter parker
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I know I already talked about it and all the reasons are probably obvious, but I still feel like I have more to say about why how Astrotrain was handled in the Skybound comics irritated me so much... somehow I still feel annoyed thinking about it and maybe if I type it out that feeling will fade XD
I remember in earlier posts I'd made, I kept saying how happy I was to see DWJ giving so much attention and depth to characters who may have actually had good spotlight episodes in the G1 cartoon, but who aren't often discussed and could have had so much more pathos in their stories. Beachcomber is a great example, as are Elita-1 and Cliffjumper. Astrotrain was the instance of this on the Decepticon side, but was also special IMO because those others still had strong influence from G1. Everything we see of Elita-1's characterization, for example, could be extrapolated from her appearances in the cartoon... I mean, I basically characterized her identically to how DWJ ended up writing her in a fic way before this series started XD But as I said in one earlier post:
... Everything about Astrotrain here baffles me. He was locked-up in the Nemesis, wants to kill Megatron who killed his âlove,â has no desire to hurt the lifeforms on Earth⊠and yet still considers the Decepticon movement for the âgreater goodâŠ?â Plus, all the twists on other characters seem heavily based in G1 or their bios and stuff, but I canât think of anything in which he had any of these traits???
And because certain overlooked characters were getting this exploration, I think I was willing to ignore things like Ravage being treated like a prop or other characters who often get overlooked, like Trailbreaker, getting nothing so far. But given what happened to Astrotrain, I suddenly am much more critical and it's killed my interest!
Astrotrain's motivation apparently involving another character also brought up many questions. It would be one thing if Megatron had slighted/hurt him directly, but it makes Astrotrain's sense that the Decepticon ideology in general is still correct despite all his misgivings and desire for revenge against Megatron incredibly interesting. I thought Astrotrain was by far the most three-dimensional of all the Decepticons in the comic, and anticipated he'd have an arc and that by learning more about why he still believed in the Decepticon dogma, we'd come to learn about the Decepticon faction in general!
However, none of this ended up being the case. We don't really learn anything. We don't know why Megatron killed his love, Astrotrain never changed or grew as a character, and with Megatron's execution of him and what DWJ says about Astrotrain in the letters page, it sounds like none of this was even on the writer's mind at all. In fact, Astrotrain appears to have existed mainly to further characterize Megatron's brutality and Starscream's enslavement... that's what the death does. It wasn't even about him as a character.
And you know, I'm fully aware that this is the point. In Skybound, there just isn't any room for complexity among the Decepticons. You have to escape, like Thundercracker, or be devoted like Soundwave. But I want to draw a comparison to another sympathetic Decepticon character from something else. In the show Cyberverse, the character Slipstream craved respect. That, as well as feeling torn between the clashing agendas of her superiors and her own ideals, were major struggles for her. In the end, she did end up gaining the respect she desired... but it wasn't from some Decepticon. It was from the Autobot hero, Windblade, but it took Slipstream's willingness to grow and change for that to happen. Slipstream's development was very important to this show thematically, since it would explore the idea of peace coming between the factions, and Windblade's character arc and motivation ended up being heavily shaped by Slipstream.
Why do I mention all this? Because I think this shows how this idea can be handled so much better. If Astrotrain had grown in any way whatsoever I wouldn't be so angry about his execution. But to me, it reads like everything interesting about him are things we the readers learned, but that were already true for him. He also interacted with other characters, but he didn't leave much or any impression on any of them at all, did he? I guess I just wish I could have known more about Astrotrain's "weakness."
#I think it makes me feel embarrassed and stupid and feeling that way doesn't encourage me to read lol#my analysis#skybound spoilers#Astrotrain#maccadam
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just a little announcement and goodbye.
hello everyone!
i haven't been active on this blog for quite a while, and the other day, someone sent an ask asking me why. and honestly, it's taken me a while to think of the answer.
to be real with you, a lot of it was that i started watching more men's football than women's, simply because, in my country, it's nearly impossible to find ways to watch the games. i still love women's football, i'm still a player myself, and i'm grateful for finding woso and the comminuty here.
but also, a big part of it was the hate.
i know that, personally, the hate i received wasn't nearly as bad as some of the other creators on here. but still, it's hate. it hurts. no one wants it. genuinely, woso tumblr has become so toxic, it's crazy. people demand content, writers put it out, and then all they receive is hate and negative feedback. it's not particularly motivating to have everything you work hard on constantly being put down, although, you would've thought that was obvious.
i'm not sure the kind of person it takes to send hate, death threats and judgement to people simply existing, doing something that they find fun, but i really do hope that they get their karma and genuinely regret sucking the enjoyment out of writers and pushing them off the app.
i think it all goes back to "treat others how you want to be treated" and "if you don't have anything nice to say, don't say anything." simply lessons we were taught as young children that many people seem to have forgotten.
that's all from me. this isn't some goodbye letter, because i'll still reblog posts and read woso writing, but it is an announcement that i am done writing about woso (for now).
i certainly wasn't one of the 'big' creators on here, and there's a high chance not really anyone will even see this, but if you are, just know, you are loved, appreciated and valued. no matter your identity or what people say about you.
thank you to everyone who enjoyed my few works that i did put out, and for all the followers and interactions i gained over the months i was active here. if you're interested in my writing still, and watch men's football, i'm still really active on (@obvithe-bestsoph). but if not, thank you, and goodbye <3
-obvi-the-best-soph â€ïž
#woso x reader#woso#obvi-the-best-soph#goodbye and thank you!#fc barcelona#fcb#fc barcelona women#matildas#fcb femeni#swnt#alexia putellas#fc barcelona femeni#sam kerr#sam kerr x reader
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to all of the people gathered here today - friends and enemies alike, those who know me and those who do not - allow me to confess my sins before the altar of your ignorance.
some time ago, i embarked upon a certain course of action that caused a lot of trouble for many people. at the time, i believed my actions to be motivated by righteousness - that, because i had witnessed the long mistreatment of a group of people i considered to be my friends and allies, i bore a mandate to right this wrong. when i heard about this conflict from a distance, through broad summaries and vague allusions, i was able to remain apathetic, but the moment it was brought before my eyes, everything from bitterness to righteous fury filled me - thus, said the voice in my ear that i told myself was justice, i had an obligation. to right this injustice. to revenge myself upon the people who had harmed those who belonged under my banner. to take up arms in the only way i knew how, and fight back.
and so i did.
but did things get better? certainly, circumstances changed and the relevant landscape was transformed to a dramatic effect. but what of the people, the cause i had wished to protect? could i say that my actions, though naive and ill-thought-out as they were, had actually resulted in a material improvement in the circumstances of others?
no. of course not.
i knew this. mere days after i first embarked upon this course of action, i was warned about the potential consequences of my actions: many people spoke against my choices, including those whose opinions i deeply respected. so, almost immediately after i began this course of action and the consequences began to ripple outwards into the landscape, i had a good idea of how things would end. or if not end - if i could still persuade myself that things could end well and peacefully - how this conflict would continue.
and continue it did: just as predicted, those i had provoked in the pursuit of my "justice" soon revenged themselves upon me. the people i had sought to defend, with all the hotheaded naivety of an unwitting white-knight, suffered additional misfortunes. if they too wished to curse my name for what i had done, then they would be entirely justified.
and yet i stayed my course. i could have given up everything, abandoned this and all future project in this vein, and slunk back to anonymity with my tail between my legs. it would have been easy. certainly, if i had done so, i would not have pulled nearly as many all-nighters.
but i did not.
why?
at first, i told myself it was for vengeance. when i first embarked upon this course of action, i told myself that the burning in my chest was righteousness - but perhaps i had misdiagnosed that feeling. perhaps that unpleasant ache - the jitteriness in my limbs, the cold hand gripping my heart, the seizing of my lungs that told me that if i did not do anything then i would cease to exist - was not justice, but rather vengeance. perhaps what i had really wanted was not to help my friends, but rather to hurt my enemies.
to make them seethe. to find something precious to them and steal it away. to start a fight with them and emerge victorious - after all, when i had run face-first into their insufferable smugness and refusal to engage with basic reality, had i not been frustrated? infuriated? had i not seethed and coped with the humiliation of defeat, enraged yet completely powerless against the fact that i had picked a fight with them and lost? thus, by flipping the table - by taking something precious and important from them - had i not avenged this humiliation, snatched the crown of victory back for myself, and thus gained the satisfaction of seeing those i hated bitterly cursing my name?
and certainly, it did seem that this was the case at first. if i could not have justice, then vengeance instead would be a fitting explanation for my actions. after all, when i overheard those i hated cursing the current state of affairs and bemoaning their newfound misfortune, a certain part of my soul filled with joy. and when i thought about them in their bright towers, gnashing their teeth at the architect of their irritation, knowing i was out there yet unable to do anything about it, i could not help but smile.
but, in the end, even this narrative was false. the more i thought about it, the more i had to admit: vengeance had not been the true factor motivating me, either.
after all, just what impact did i have? just how did my actions actually affect the prospects of my enemies, other than irritating them for a short while? look at the present state of affairs. certainly, my enemies had seethed and coped and raged against me. certainly, they had been inconvenienced by my actions. and yet, now they've started to move on. they found new causes to harry, new people to torment, and they forgot about me. all of my efforts and schemes had certainly inconvenienced them, yes - but nothing more.
and yet i stayed my course.
why?
it wasn't any of that after all, i realized one day. what i had truly wanted was the feeling of accomplishing something.
before - long before - i had maintained aspirations of becoming something. i was smart, i had accomplishments, i had my entire future before me - if my peers could be considered impressive, then i was not in any way inferior to them. yet, within a few years, all of those tomorrows had dried up to nothing. all around me, my peers were growing their wings and taking off, carving their names into the bedrock of society, yet i alone remained flightless. once, i had aspirations of becoming something, yet now i found myself failing to meet even bare-minimum expectations. before i even knew it, i had lost the right to stand beside my friends.
and so, i wanted to accomplish something. be it good or be it evil, be it effective or be it futile, i wanted to design a project and then see that project materialized into reality. i wanted to prove that i could still affect reality. i wanted - no, i needed - to prove that i, without the assistance of anyone else, with nothing but my own power and whatever resources were available to me, could build something that would change the circumstances of hundreds of other people.
through this, i would affirm my ability. through this, i would affirm my existence.
what justice? what righteousness? in the end, none of the people i sought to help actually benefitted in any major fashion; rather, i only brought additional misfortune upon them instead. what vengeance, what victory? in the end, the people i hated lost interest and moved on as well. what fictitious self-narration, what pathetic self-delusion - in the end, everything i did was for my own sake! in the end, all that had existed was my own ego - the tantalizing possibility that i could, and therefore i would! in the end, all that had driven my actions was - me, myself, i!
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