#how dare you🧍‍♂️

[blujayonthewing]

girl we went to high school with but was several grades below us: why didn't I know you in school?? you're fuckin hilarious [to justin] I'm just gonna keep hitting on your wife, she's great

me internally: getting a good grade in human 😊

[pixlokita]

You're more of a Polly-pocket than MXES could ever be. XD

Just because you’re like 😭 20 ft tall don’t mean I’m pocket sized.

[banj0possum]

Alistair x (platonically) Teen Reader

In the fic he is like oh my god a bride, he walks in and instead of an adult..or a bride-

They find a teen, who literally threw a pebble at him, an angsty teen💀

I’m very happy to read ur fics and usually pair them with teen/child mc because I find it funny because they expect the love of their life

and teen mc standing there :🧍‍♂️

anyways sorry for the long request, luv ur writing, and ur art :D

Yandere! Evil King x Teen! GN! Reader

CW: platonic relationship, Alistair is a bit of a DILF so do with it as you will, Dads are hot you guys!! READER IS A MINOR.

👑 Who is this sassy lost child?

👑 His minions kidnapped you while you were on a carriage ride back to your kingdom.

👑 He was hoping for like a princess or something to marry and take over the kingdom with or whatever so like...what tf he gonna do with you???

👑 Clearly you were too young to be in a situation like this, but theres no way he's giving you back without a reward, so yes he still holds you for ransom.

👑 "Child, I am Alistair, King of-ACk!"

👑 Did...did you throw a pillow at him?!

👑 "How dare yo- AHK! Stop it!" another one..

👑 You refuse to listen to anything he says, you just wanted to go home

👑 You two had a bit of rivalry for a bit. He hated you and you hated him.

👑 He promised not to show any affection or care towards you since in his eyes, your actions didn't deserve it. How can someone be so rude to a king !?

👑 But he starts to notice you don't eat much. He never sees you in the dining hall and has only seen quick moments of you nibbling on some bread or pastries the servants gave you.

👑 He scoffed, so irresponsible! You must eat a proper meal right this second or you'll starve!

👑 You're surprised to see a meal prepared for you during your routine trip to get a snack from the pantry with a note on the plate.

👑 "Next time, ask for a proper meal. I don't want your parents to think I've been starving you. -Alistair P.S. go to bed early."

👑 Huh...

👑 Alistair smiled from the doorway of the dining hall, watching you eat up with a smile on your face. You might have been too scared of him to ask for food so you've been sneaking snacks while he wasn't looking.

👑 Of course he wasn't doing it because he cared about you, he just didn't want royalty like you to resort to such pathetic means to eat!

👑 Why are you still sad? Perhaps he should get you some things to keep your attention..

👑 He asks (threateningly may I add) about your hobbies or interests.

👑 The next morning your cell (which has been upgraded to a lovely room in the castle because he didn't want you to be filthy and gross in a dungeon) was filled with anything he could find that he thought you'd enjoy.

👑 Don't think he wants you to be happy! He's just tired of seeing you sulk everywhere!

👑 He denies everything, but you swear you could see a tiny smile on his face when you hugged him happily.

👑 You start being a little more open to him, showing him anything you've made or done with pride and he'd receive it gratefully, but he won't show it of course.

👑 "I made you this friendship bracelet!"

👑 "I've seen better jewelry."

👑 "Oh I'll take it back then I guess.."

👑 "No, it's mine now, back off."

👑 Drawings and the like that he said would be thrown out as soon as you left would be seen framed in his room

👑 It would be a..waste of good canvas..

👑 And of course he buys a few books of your choice for you to read, he'd be damned if your brain turns to mush.

👑 Bro bro he'd be the type to let you swing around while holding onto his bicep.

👑 If you ever have any problems, or come to him in a bad mood, he'd have no idea how to help other than to sit down and listen to your troubles.

👑 He's not the most physical when it comes to affection, but you bet your ass he's gonna do everything he can to cheer you up.

👑 At this point he's rewriting his demands for the ransom. Either your kingdom lets him sign some adoption papers or he's starting a war.

[hp-hcs]

Hello there.

Since you're taking a request, then maybe some poły relationship with Theo and Mattheo. Preferably male lub gn reader

Thanks and have a good day

aaaaaa a non-monogamous relationship with my two favorite boyos??? abso-fuckin-lutely!!!

polyamorous theodore nott & mattheo riddle x gn!reader headcanons

(lovely pictures from @demieyesore)

since it wasn’t specified if the boyos were dating each other as well or not, i made it ✨up to reader interpretation✨

❕gender-neutral reader❕

TWs: violence (it’s theo & mattheo, what do you expect?), brief sexual harassment/attempted sexual assault (?)

requests open (please for the love of god)

•••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••••

general headcanons:

mattheo is little spoon and i will take no arguments

(he’s almost always in the middle <3)

if you call theo literally any pet name he will die on the spot

same if you call mattheo any variation of ‘pretty boy’ or ‘cutie’

(extra bonus points if you compliment something unrelated to his physical appearance, like how well he did on a test, or how perceptive he is. homeboy will have no idea how to respond. he’ll just be like 🧍‍♂️🥹👍🫶)

the poly thing actually only happened because there was a very aggressive love triangle thing going on and then they were like “wait this is dumb”

plus, it makes a bunch of the teachers uncomfy, + both of their fathers, so really it’s ideal

they r possessive as F U C K

they can share with each other, that’s it. no one else.

i dare anyone to try to bully or harass you

or actually, even just look at you

OR IF SOMEBODY TRIES TO ASK YOU OUT

someone call an ambulance for the poor fuck 💥🚑🚨🩹🪦💀

lil oneshot thing? idk man:

you go to one of enzo’s stupid parties without your boys

“i’ll be fine guys, promise”

y/n was, in fact, Not Fine™

someone tries to hit on you but just DOESNT TAKE NO FOR AN ANSWER

let's say it’s cormac mclaggen cause mf is creepy asf

(i know everyone makes him like ‘the bad guy’ but yk what if you don’t like it go write ur own headcanons. they’d probably be better anyways)

anywhore, cormac is like, getting a lil too close for comfort

just kind of haranguing you the whole night

offering drinks, complimenting how you’re dressed, telling you that your boyfriends are “so lucky to have someone as sexy as you”

🤮🤮

you are OBVIOUSLY uncomfortable

but shit hits the fan when he grabs your waist/hip area and tries to kiss you

✨surprise!✨

your mancandy was here the whole time 😌

(not cause they don’t trust you, they just don’t trust anybody else)

💥👊😡🩸🩹🔪🗡️💣

cormac: 🥊🦷😵‍💫🩸🩹🩼☠️⚰️🪦

(lowkey hot to watch em defend you but yk)

((y/n for literally no reason: 👁️🫦👁️)

(((if you tell mattheo you think it’s hot, he’ll just go 🥺🫶💋😚🫂)))

misc:

expounding further on my earlier mattheo x reader headcanons, a scientific study i’ve conducted has found that mattheo riddle is, in fact, a himbo

from the new partridge dictionary of slang and unconventional english, a himbo is “a man objectified by his good looks and presumed lack of intellectual qualities, a man who trades on this image, a gigolo”

objectified by his good looks? have you met tumblr? ✅

lack of intellectual qualities? well, he thinks violence solves everything and thinks with his dick instead of his brain so i’m gonna say yeah ✅

but let’s keep it going, shall we?

a himbo is also defined as the “human version of a golden retriever—beautiful, incredibly well-intentioned, and dumb.”

…yep

beautiful ✅ well-intentioned (in his own mind) ✅ & dumb (lovingly) ✅

additionally: buff 💪 ✅ & respects his romantic partner(s) ✅

“but hp-hcs,” you bemoan. “what does that make theo?”

well, my dear delusionists, theodore nott is a hunk—not quite a himbo, but close

hopefully this venn diagram i made of some of the himbos & himbo-adjacents in the hp world will help illustrate this for you

[shotmrmiller]

Air jail?? No cause I’d just be quietly giggling if Simon lifted me like 🧍‍♂️for smacking his fat ass

one firm grab of his cake and you're in the air for 10 min how dare you that's his job

[extinctspino]

can you do wednesday x fem yn and pugsley is over for parents week and see them kissing and make sure of wednesday and tells mortica and gomez

Snitch

Pairing: Wednesday x femreader

Wordcount:

Warnings:none

Author's note: I'm sorry for the titel, my brain just wasn't braining.

------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------------

Parents week finally arrived and you couldn’t be more nervous since you were gonna have to meet Wednesday’s parents.

Yours couldn’t make it so you had to spend the whole week with her family. Not that you didn’t want that of course, but meating your girlfriend’s parents was a big deal to you.

They didn’t even know that Wednesday had a girlfriend which made it 100 times worse. You bombarded your girlfriend with questions like ‘Are you sure they’ll like me?’ ‘What if they think I’m not good enough for you?’ and so so so many more.

At a certain point Wednesday finally had enough. 

While students reunited with their parents you and Wednesday were shamelessly making out with each other behind a random wall.

It’s weird to think that at first Wednesday couldn’t even hold your hand and now she’s pushing you up against the wall, kissing you fiercly. Oh, how time can change people... for the better in this case.

“Why isn’t she here yet?” Family Addams split up and went to go search for their dear family member. Pugsley being team 1 and Moricia in team 2 together with Gomez. They’d never split up.

“You’re asking to many questions.” She paused to look at your flushed face for a bit before placing her lips on yours again.

“Wednesday?” 

You and Wednesday basically teleported away from each other with how fast you were. You tried to wipe away the lipstick that you know was smeared all over your mouth thanks to Wednesday’s dark lipstick.

“You’re going to keep your mouth shut about this.” Wednesday could be so threatening without trying. You felt bad for who you assumed to be Pugsley. Wednesday had told you a little bit about her family after you had practically begged her to.

Pugsley kept quiet and out of nowhere he began running in the opposite direction of Wednesday. “Chase him.” You looked at her questioningly. “Do you want to get tortured with him?” Your eyes widened and you sprinted after Pugsley. 

He hadn’t gotten that for so you easily caught up to him but it was already too late... A tall lady and a short man stood there right in front of you. The dots inside your mind instantly connected. Their dark clothes, the woman who looks similar to Wednesday.

“S-she- she and Wednesday were making out!” Pugsley was beyond out of breath. It looked like he could pass out anytime now. You chuckled awkwardly, “Nice to meet you?” You hesitantly held out your hand but you dropped it when Wednesday arrived and glared at Pugsley.

“Hello mother, hello father. This is my partner.” Gomez and Morticia’s eyes were already wide at what Pugsley told them but now it looked like they were gonna pop out of their sockets.

“Don’t be so surprised, I’m your child after all.” It made sense, Gomez and Morticia were next level with their affection but it was still weird for them to find out their anti-social, anti-loving, anti-everything daugher had a lover. And the smeared lipstick on your mouth didn’t make it easier.

“Let’s get to know each other better, dear.” Morticia tried to play it off cool but she couldn’t hide the smile that appeared on her face when she watched Wednesday wipe your face for you. 

Getting to know her family would be fun. What was a little less fun for you though was watching Pugsley get waterboarded for telling on her like that. You didn’t dare intervene cause she promised to include you in Pugsley’s punishment.

If anyone asked you, parents week was interesting to say the least.

[daddiel-ish]

MONThs later

luffy: KAIDO im ready to fight you

kaido: *litreally half drunk* dude no you have kid now and how's the baby

luffy: oh their right here *he has one of those baby holders on the front of him*

Kaido: DUDE WTFF

*cue law being summoned like demon cause she sensed luffys dumbness* (he cause her of guard cause law went to bed)

*later*

*law beating the shit out of luffy*

kaido somehow holding the kid but he doesn't dare hurt them (he has standers) but is kinda just like 🧍‍♂️

I can totally see Luffy bringing his kid around in one of those thing ahahahah Maybe the child is also having fun following their dad in his absurd adventures (They're Luffy's child, after all)

Poor Law, the more she tries to keep her child safe, the more the others are putting them in danger, both the Hearts and the Straw-Hats. She can't even sleep for 10 minutes-

At least the child, in the future, could say that they were held by Kaido himself 🤷‍♂️

[universalthaumaturge]

Nobilis Dash Simulator

❤️‍🔥 theworkofhellisholy Follow

i love you shipping discourse i love you having to make accounts for everything i love you small talk i love you esophageal cancer i love you deforestation i love you scabs you can't help but pick even though you're not supposed to i love you scabs as in strikebreakers i love you unbearably hot weather in winter i love you people who film strangers in public without their consent i love you prion disease i love you car-based infrastructure i love you gallstones i love you stock market i love you enshittification i lov

36 notes

🌳 sneacensnoveonthesnorldsnash Follow

just ate an elfsciene panini for the first time and cried i love u world

🌺 flore7 Follow

i'm dying of cake so i can't really eat it without being crushed to death by a giant cake mountain but aelfscienne's is so good i don't even care anymore LOL

🌳 sneacensnoveonthesnorldsnash Follow

i want you carnally

🪲 lord-entropy-official Follow

Why do I even bother anymore.

607,789 notes

🐶 surolam Follow

Remember to use miracles responsibly! There has been a surprising increase in dementia animus cases lately.

lakedrinker10000-deactivated60231212

and what if we don't?

👨‍⚖️ locourtbailiff Follow

oh thats simple! TEN THOUSAND LOCUST ATTACK 🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗🦗

12,144 notes

🕵️ illegalregal Follow

ok i know we're meant to "enact vengeance no more than sevenfold unto their crime" or whatever but what the fuck does that MEAN????

🕵️ illegalregal Follow

like, if an excrucian eats the leftovers i had on my fridge, do i eat their food? do i punch them (but softly enough that it's not over 7x as worse as having your leftovers stolen!)?? is there a conversion guide somewhere. how the hell do you MEASURE that?????

7 notes

🦑 yog-sazasthur Follow

Kids these days TOO FOCUS on their damned CELL-PHONES..... They should be Eating... Having Sex... And Wriggling !

30,054 notes

👽 prescottsdaddy Follow

do you think cneph and harumaph ever explored eachother's bodies

cneph Follow

we did

👽 prescottsdaddy Follow

dude's literally roleplaying as the great maker and the angels in the notes are calling ME blasphemous???

90,732 notes

☠️ chattering-monkeys-and-parrots Follow

kys. just in general

🧍‍♂️ the-light-is-perfection Follow

excuse you???

☠️ chattering-monkeys-and-parrots Follow

kys in particular

281,667 notes

👼 graceful-invader Follow

guys the voice of the creator is telling me we should kiss eachother with tounge. this is what heaven needs

733,712 notes

🔨 warry-in-main Follow

just did my first tempering and it turns out the dude was lactose intolerant

🐻 peregrine-twink Follow

aw man that sucks. is there anything we can do to help?

🔨 warry-in-main Follow

take my test boy

1,907 notes

🧸 dailydahlia Follow

Why do people still think i'm a mimic?!

#seriously guys! #longfurby is RIGHT THERE.

1 note

💠 itfuckenwildy Follow

god i fucking hate it here

🎩 qistjannuja Follow

Hate? No no no my enemy, you don't "hate" creation. Not really.

Let me tell you about actual hate. Pure, undiluted, wyrdbound Hate.

I was ROYALTY. I ruled over my lands with a kind hand and an iron fist and we THRIVED. But then, the little prick you call a maker fucking drowned it all in… in THIS. This grimy, glitched, causational mess you dare to call home.

If that was it, I'd be pissed. I'd be furious, even. But that's not all.

It had the AUDACITY to poison me with its substance. I physically can't stay in the void because it leaks out and poisons it too. And when I come back, guess what? It kills me. Over and over and over and over. I've died five times this month. Died of HORSES. Imagine getting stampeded on just for daring to exist, **WHICH I DON'T BY THE WAY**.

And you know what? if that was it, I could take it. If that was it, I would just take the L and try to adapt. I would try to find beauty in the world, you know? stop and smell the flowers? But GUESS WHAT. Your "great maker" DIDN'T EVEN MAKE THE WORLD RIGHT. It's all... eugh.

I can't stand the creation simps who try to defend it but HARUMAPH-MY-WITNESS I FUCKING DESPISE the ones who think they hate it more than me. YOU DON'T. Fuck you. I'll world-breaker's hand you. Bitch.

💠 itfuckenwildy Follow

nvm i love it here. where else would you get shit like this

🎭 gaathika-aupa-yochelm Follow

"i'll world-breaker's hand you. bitch." LMAOOO i bet this dumbass doesn't even have the drunkard's gift

🎩 qistjannuja Follow

It's none of your fucking business, ""Aupa"", and besides, it seems you don't understand what an ANALOGY is.

"World-Breaker's Handing" someone is simply meant to imply utterly and retroactively erasing them, something your deceiveroid intellect probably wouldn't comprehend anyways.

I am a Votary in my Dream-of-Self and a Dustcloak of my Sphere, I don't need some paltry Wyrd-trick to kill either of you.

🎭 gaathika-aupa-yochelm Follow

🌌 not-heritage-posts Follow

Not-Heritage Post

124,801 notes

🌸 botanyhellyeah Follow

my gf mde fun of me bc i cant open the jar of pickle but shes a supernal martialart master and im jsut a little motal i'm not even miraculous in natures

🧘‍♂️ zulander Follow

Rosie, sweetheart, do you remember the miraculous bracers you made? the ones with the oak leaves, that make you as strong as a noble when you say the command word? the ones you're wearing right now?

🌸 botanyhellyeah Follow

FUFK

25,678 notes

👥 weamlegion0015 Follow

normalize consuming peolpe and incorporating them into the unliving matrix of your pseudoself! ^u^

🪀 jojotun Follow

Are you an actual

👥 weamlegion0015 Follow.

no what makes u say that? :P

🪀 weamlegion0016 FOLLOW.

aah it was nohting! my bad XD

20 notes

🤫 iolithae Follow

this joke format is still funny and relevant

5 notes

👚 dionylsus Follow

look it's not a sex thing when i pretend to be a set of human clothes and my partner wears me to the movies, ok? we do it so we don't have to pay two tickets. putting me in the washing machine IS a sex thing though

120 notes

cneph Follow

can someone please get me out of this fiddle. the wi-fi is great but i can't stretch without getting splinters

0 notes

🌟 ananda Follow

I might have accidentally let a few urbana escape into the prosaic. Stay safe out there.

141,235,813 notes

👨 im-an-anchor-you-wankor Follow

WHY THE FUCK IS MY TRASH CAN BITING ME

[magicalink]

Bunny Boy Kuni

Bunnyboy Kuni who has those adorable teeth, longer than humans an other hybrids, those teeth that he tries to hide all the time. He is so self-conscious about them! But you love them, you always do your best to make him laugh so you can see them. And he only shows his true teethy smile in front of you, because you make him feel loved and safe 💕

Bunnyboy Kuni who has long, fluffy ears that cascade down his pretty head. You love caressing them and telling him just how adorable he is. He shushes you, how dare you call him an adorable bunny?? Just because he is a bunny hybrid doesn't mean he isn't a big and strong man! He'll prove it to you, he'll pick you up and carry you around all day! You love his soft and pretty ears. And he won't ever admit it, but he loves when you tug them and grip them for dear support when you are riding him. You're the only one allowed to see and touch them, most time they remain hidden by his huge hat.

Bunnyboy Kuni who has the cutest, fluffiest, spongiest bunnytail in the world. It looks like a cotton pompom. He uses clothes that hide it all the time but when he's at home with you in loose and comfy clothes you rejoice in onserving it. He huffs and pouts when you point it out but he loves when you touch it and pull it gently and you tell him he's the cutest creature in the world. He becomes all flushed and grumpy and tells you that how dare you talk about him like he was a cute little pet! He'll show you what he's made of! He won't admit it, but he feels cute and loved when you insist on telling him how adorable and beautiful he is even when he's pounding into you with unbridled passion.

Wtf is this? I have no idea. Some feverish delusion I had while ill in bed after thinking how my bf's theeth look a bit long like those of a bunny 🧍‍♂️ I procceed to go back to waiting for my medical check ups results💨

[the-fairy-thing]

Rochester feeling personally attacked or offended by Jane… a thread:

Rochester: “do you think me handsome?

Jane: “no sir”

Rochester: 👁️👄👁️

Rochester: “it’s nearly 4am go back to your room the servants will be up soon”

Jane: “okay goodnight”

Rochester: “WHAT? YOU’RE LEAVING ME?”

Jane: **leaves the party Rochester forced her to be at…**

Rochester: “why didn’t you come speak to me🧍‍♂️”

Jane: “I don’t know or speak to any of the men here”

Fortune Teller Rochester: “Will you say that of the master of this house!?”

Jane: “he’s not here”

Rochester: “so I just don’t exist now. does that exclude him?🥲”

Jane: “I am back, my aunt is dead”

Rochester: “gone from me a whole month and forgetting me quite I’ll be sworn”😔

Jane: “I anticipate you’ll love me for about 3 months after we marry then I hope you at least like me after that”

Rochester: “WHA-(don’t cry Eddie😭💔) HOW DARE YOU SULLY MY LOVE FOR YOU JANE… TAKE IT BACK NOW😡”

Rochester: “I’m sorry Jane plz forgive me with a kiss🥺🥰”

Jane: “I’d rather not”

Rochester: “hard little thing”😠

Rochester: “it’s the last night of our engagement plz have dinner with me🥺”

Jane: “no”

Rochester: “Do I eat like a pig that you are repulsed to eat with me?😔”

Jane: “I’m just not hungry but I’ll sit with you”

Rochester: “yay😁”

Rochester: “if you were mad do you think I should hate you?”

Jane: “yes”

Rochester: “THEN YOU KNOW NOTHING ABOUT ME OR THE SORT OF LOVE WHICH I AM CAPABLE OF😡… prepare for one of the most romantic quotes you’ll ever hear🥹”

Jane: “St. John is young and very handsome… he’s tall, blonde, and with a Grecian profile”👀🤭

Rochester: “Damn him”😡 “fine Jane go marry this cousin the husband you have chosen😔”

[cheesycatz]

INSTAGRAM ASKS BELOW WOOHOO I CAN NOT SHUT UP ABOUT THIS FREAK

(I updated the lore posts on here in like May because there was outdated stuff I completely missed and finally updated it on instagram too woopsies🧍‍♂️)

He draws. In used school notebooks, across old books, over discarded mail. Broken pencils, dried up markers, dull crayons, chewed pens. He draws the trees he will never climb, fields and fields of flowers, discolored leaves and vines. Sometimes he adds himself.

He keeps a faded journal in one of the jacket's many hidden pockets. A way to pass the time while waiting for prey to… sell to. He only draws “Spamton” in it, not himself. Nothing incriminating.

…never drawn an addison before.

In all seriousness, I've dedicated a lot of thought to Wormton's art style and what he draws. It's relevant to the fic; as foreshadowing, as angst, as fluff, as a plot device. It's meant to appear childish—as in, made by someone who just wanted to make something without caring about what it looks like. The lines are jagged and dig into the page, often ripping through. I held the pencil with three fingers, and used my right (nondominant) hand to write the text and color. His face is drawn in an abstract way where it doesn't resemble his mask, but anyone who hasn't seen his real face would assume it is the mask. He draws himself bigger than he really is, draws his three fingers in place of his mittens, and colors his eyes in the wrong order because he uses his mirrored reflection as reference. He draws Blue's face nearly the exact same as his because he doesn't know how to draw anyone but himself, and forgets their fourth fingers and scribbles them on after the fact. His spelling and handwriting is incomprehensible half the time.

Other than drawing, he also spends a lot of time hunting for food. He explores the Trash Zone, looking for things to sell or keep. He spends time performing maintenance on his disguise, either attempting to clean it or do repairs. He takes time to groom his fur, genuinely hating how filthy his costume and having to look in dumpsters makes him. He likes to inspect and rearrange all the trinkets in his nest before he burrows into his vast pile of shredded blankets, stuffing, and old pillows for the night (or morning? He's not quite nocturnal but he goes to sleep at like 3 am).

Blue's fear definitely does not go away. They might not be as grossed out by certain things (like if they saw an insect or centipede rubbing its legs against its antennae, they'd now understand that it’s simply grooming itself in the same way Wormton cleans his nose). But, I think that the majority of their fear for “creepy crawlies” (and Wormton initially) come from how unpredictable and fast they can be. They're hard to keep track of, you can't tell if they're crawling on your face or if your brain is being paranoid, spiders and centipedes specifically come out when the lights are off, Wasps will sting you for doing absolutely nothing, it goes on. They invade your safe space, you can't tell which can kill you and which are harmless, and nothing you do will convince them to leave your home.

Fortunately for Blue, Wormton's pheromones scare away pretty much any animal with a sense of smell, and he eats whatever is left. There's no birdsong around their home. He's the only one they have to worry about raiding the pantry, building nests in the walls, and crawling on the ceiling.

Yeah, I imagine that Ralsei and/or Queen would have to announce to the general public that Spamton is under protection so that he can finally exist without his disguise. Out of the volunteer researchers who weren't killed and didn't leave Cyber City before Deltarune takes place, I don't think they would dare enter his presence. Personally I would not try to speak to the last surviving member of a genocide if I had previously experimented on and killed thousands of their people's children

There's a lot of hatred for invasive species, especially ones that cause severe damage to both property and people, like malworms do. Some take joy in killing as many as possible. But, I think it's important to remember that species don't choose to be invasive. This is especially apparent with malworms, since they're sapient (though that information isn't really known by darkners). They've been taken out of their natural cave-like environment in the Deep Web and thrown onto the Surface Web with no hope of returning. The bright lights, loud sounds, and open areas of the city are disorienting and terrifying. But, without natural predators or competition, malworms multiply quickly. They destroy buildings, chew power lines, and kill anything they come across. But, the malworms can't stay, can't be reasoned with, and eradicating them was the only option Cyber City had. I suppose it's a miserable fight on both ends. Nobody really wins.

Technically, the only plastic required in a malworm's diet is polyethylene, and gift cards are usually made of polyvinyl chloride acetate. But, malworms like chewing and eating inedible things in general, so it wouldn't be surprising if one did eat a gift card. They like stealing/eating physical money because it annoys people and because Cyber World's dark dollars happen to be made out of the plastic they need.

[paddooo]

tell me more about divorce au

teehee okay kicking my feet twirling my hair

so hazel flies out from canada as soon as she hears nicos getting sick. because this aint the first time hes been really sick and she dont wanna be far away even if it means leaving frank and the twins at home

which means as soon as leo grows a pair and goes to visit nico. hes greeted with hazel. and let me tell you whimsy, she is not fucking happy to see him there, so she drags him out into the hall where she starts whisper shouting at him for having the audacity to show his face, for daring to come visit nico and cause him more stress and grief for having to see his ex husband

and leos just like. 🧍‍♂️. hi hazel. i brought him tonights pastry. i got jason to make cannolis because theyre his favourite. hows he doing today.

nico is of course (secretly) thrilled that leo visited and hes very touched that leo and jason made cannolis for him. he doesnt have the heart to tell hazel to lay off him, he knows shes just stressed out and thinks nico hates leo because. well why wouldnt he. theyre divorced, and they do not play nice at work

but outside of work theyre pretty chill with eachother aside from nico going 🙄🙄🙄🙄😑😑😒😒at everything leo says, but he cant help that hes a petty bitch

and hazel means well, and how could he tell his baby sister no

[kxmikomrade]

🍁˖࿐ Artist! S/O - Isagi, Bachira, Reo, Sae

╰┈➤Hcs of them with an Artistic S/O!! Genre: Fluff and crack Gn!reader or Any gender Warnings: Swearing, Not proof read bcs im lazy, idk wat else but lmk if theres anything else Waiter's Note: OH LOOK WHO FINALLY PULLED THIS OUTTA THEIR DRAFTS AFTER A WHOLE ASS 5 MONTHS LMAOO I HOPE U GUYS ENJOY <33 Reqs Open as usual!! Masterlists

Now Playing: An Art Gallery Could Never Be As Unique As You

Very VERY VERYYYY fascinated on what you do, he thinks it's really cool

He canonly likes art too so let him join in!!

Draw him in any way like even a small doodle and he WILL COMBUST

He decorated his wall infront of his desk with your drawings and doodles, other things like custom keychains, origami, glass paintings are on his desk so he can see it everyday when he wakes up 🥹🥹

Study dates with you two often end up in drawing-cuddling sessions

Starting with studying so you can both pass your exams to you two beside eachother, legs tangled under the kotatsu table while you both lay on your stomachs, drawing whatever you felt like drawing 🫶

Let's just hope that you both pass your exams 😭😭

When you have art block or you feel stressed, he offers to take you out to a walk (yk he loves those esp with you)

It may seem kinda annoying at first but trust me, it does WONDERS

YOUR WORKS ARE DISPLAYED THROUGHOUT THE ISAGI HOUSEHOLD ✨

His parents like your creations too but they ALWAYS remind you whenever you come over that it's okay to take breaks and do other things 🥹💖

He's not rich by all means, but he's willing to spend his money to get you supplies u want

When he got the letter for blue lock, you both agreed to meet at a park at night and you talked things through, promising to work hard and improve while you both are separated

Whenever the topic of art or s/o comes in, he just ends up talking everyones ear off in blue lock and the question was just from a truth or dare game😭

Whether or not you got recognized for your art and got more commissions/promotions or quit art to start something new that interests you, he's supportive just as you are for him 🫶

HE LOVES ART, AND YOUR AN ARTIST?? MATCH MADE IN HEAVEN

Introduces you to his mom <33 you both share tips and tricks and now she's like your teacher ITS SO CUTE

But Meguru gets pretty pouty if you just sit there beside his mom talking about art related things all day 😭

If you let him lay down on your lap and give him occasional kisses then he'll be able to sit still for a while longer

You gave him a bee-themed soccer ball you painted once and he ALWAYS has it on his bed so he can fall asleep hugging it 🥹

He doesn't play with it tho, atleast not outdoors bcs he doesn't wanna ruin it 😭💖

Painting with him and his mom if she isn't busy!!

He always plays around and puts paint on your face, his mom scolds him for it LMAOO

Don't take him to art museums pls 😭😭 HAVE YOU SEEN HOW HE WAS IN THE LIGHT NOVEL?? you both would get in trouble just because he was bored 💀

BRAGS TO EVERYONE AND ANYONE IN BLUE LOCK ABOUT YOU THAT THEY LITERALLY KNOW YOU AND EVERY SINGLE ART PIECE YOU HAVE DONE BEFORE EVEN MEETING YOU OR SEEING THEM 💀💀😭

Has tried to eat paint before 🧍‍♂️Much worse if you paint food then bro might try it again 💀💀💀

You sit on a bench nearby and draw while he practices, it's relaxing, just watch out for the ball 😭💀

Oh boy

Id say for a FACT that you were broke until you started dating him unless you have really cheap materials or you're just really good at saving

Yk how art materials and art school is so ridiculously expensive?? Well, your LOVELY boyfriend here has it all covered

Mans literally already bought a whole art shop 💀

Its not like it's anything new *looks at art big art studio*

PLEASE get a frying pan and smack some sense into this man's head bcs he was just about to buy his way into getting your art showcased in an art gallery/convention

He might, MIGHT stop if you use his own words against him. Like the whole 'i want to carve my own future' thing

Lets be fr, he won't stop, the most he could do is stop bribing his way to get your art showcased

Bby supports you alot tho :((

He just admires how much effort you're able to put in each work

When art block kicks in, he'll take you to go to expensive art galleries or to wherever the Mona Lisa is currently being showcased at

Just drag him out and tell him u wanna learn soccer 😭 it's honestly more fun than roaming around an art gallery

Paint him with his parents and they'll already start planning your marriage 💀😭

Bro when collage comes along, then your tuition fees and apartment bills are already paid like??? I wonder how 🤔

PLS DRAW HIM AND SHOW HIM THAT THERE ARE OTHER WAYS TO EXPRESS LOVE OTHER THAN MONEY SPENDING BCS HE'LL ACTUALLY UNDERSTAND WITH ALL THE TIME, EFFORT AND SKILL YOU PUT IN

He DEFINITELY frames all the drawings/paintings you give him. No buts

Let's be fr, he probably has a room in his house filled with your creations 🧍‍♂️

I'm pretty sure that blue lock allows anything to be brought unless it's a phone or something (because they'll have to earn it back) so Reo brought this photo album/journal decorated by you and/or your drawings

AND YK THOSE MINI PRINTERS??? HE BROUGHT ONE TOO SO WHENEVER YOU SEND A NEW ARTWORK, HE PRINTS IT 😭😭

Talks Nagi's ear off every time 💀

Supportive bank in general 👍 jkjk pls don't use him just for money or I will come for your eyeballs 🤗

Sae is pretty chill compared to his hardcore emo brother like did you see that one panel where he wanted to go home in the middle of a game while applying lotion???

He doesn't seem like the type to check social media often too so I hc that he draws after practices when he gets home to cool down for the night yk

I can definitely see him drawing his favorite characters from Chibi Maruko-chan whenever he feels stressed or has a bad day because of his stupid teammates who play like headless chickens 🙄(his words not mine)

So like when YOU came in, it's like he's surrounded by comfort when you two draw in silence while listening to your shared playlist 🌼

drawing fanarts for him that you wanna show off to everyone since he's beautiful and he's even more beautiful in your artstyle <33

he doesnt know about it tho because thats too embarrassing

rin follows you on that account with his private acc LMAOOOOOO

LISTEN. IMAGINE DRAWING HIM WITH HIS YEE YEE LOOKIN ASS BANGS AND TEASING HIM ABOUT IT HAHAHSHAHA

you secretly sent one to Rin for funsies once and he sent you a pic of Sae when he was young back, now you both have this sketchy deal thing going on that Sae doesnt know SHIT about

dw tho, both your mouths are sealed because now you got Rin to approve of you

If you live with him abroad, then your apartment/house is FILLED with notes/drawings/sketches/paintings/origamis, etc. im not exaggerating at ALL.

Imagine those cute and decorated fridges but make it the ENTIRE house

You both just slap some sticky note on walls, tables, chairs, cabinets, shelves, counters and draw on it,and neither of you clean them up, you just leave it there 😭😭

it comes off when it comes off ig 🤷

If you dont live with him abroad, then you guys have a minecraft server you both share thats literally FILLED with builds. Somehow, Sae's RIDICULOUSLY fast at learning these things and now hes an architect 🧍‍♂️

Also those cooperative drawing websites/games?? yeah, you both have them OFTEN, like, every night other than when hes like SUPER tired

just stick to screenshoting him and drawing on his face

He buys you anything you need/want too and theres basically no stopping him 🤷🤷

Tagging: @inariezaki

[1341 words]

[beanibon]

i like to think knives would consider himself above a god, someone a higher being than the highest of them all,, so hear me out, god reader getting absolutely railed by him.

that is the whole thought. 🧍‍♂️

Anon, istg you have the biggest brain. I hope you know I'm going feral on this post, and making some crazy ass shit up.

TW: smut, slight dubcon, giantess (sorrynotsorry, I need some size difference in my life), size difference, breast feeding (don't judge), female Pronouns but you also have a massive cock, slight oral, slight suffocation.

Cum All Ye Faithful

Mortals, so small, insignificant to a being such as yourself. Overlooking their menial tasks, though you could appreciate the determination they perceived with each obstacle. Your precious little humans, doing their darnedest so survive the horrors of this desolate planet.

"And here you are, degrading such sweet creatures." You glanced at the creation in your presence, legs kicking as he squirmed under your weight.

This being may be man-made, but a creation he was nonetheless. A cute one at that. A pity it was filled with hatred for those you protected, nothing will change that, not even the excruciating erection he spouted at your advances.

A pitiful sigh escaped you, releasing the being known as a Plant, only to hear his awful speech of anger.

"You dare treat me this way? A God!? I'll smite you for poisoning me, crush you beneath me like the ant you are!"

Your laughter had him seeing red, those funny little tendrils whipping out. "Me the ant? Aren't you so adorable! And here you are, half the the size of me."

With his face red with embarrassment, trying to look anywhere but your distracting chest, you took the opportunity to hoist him in the air. The verbal abuse you got was nothing, it was actually rather amusing to listen to. This tiny man, screaming obscenities like some big scary hell hound, when in reality he was some bad tempered chihuahua.

"Knives, was it? You need to learn how to loosen up, especially in the presence of a holy being. Actual gods don't talk like that, unlike you we have nothing to prove. So, relax." Your tongue rolled out from between your lips, that precious creation cradled gently within your hands. His bare body tasted so sinful, it certainly looked better without that hideously tempting skin tight suit. Now you could admire that alien genitalia, how it's petals opened upon contact.

"Such a pretty sight you are, see how your goddess treats you? With kindness despite your acts of violence against my precious humans." Your mouth engulfed his erection, suckling against it until that sweet nectar lathered your tastebuds.

Knives squirmed, fought against these profound advances. Treating a being of higher power like this!? He'd kill you, slay you where you stood!

"Wi-witch! Release me! Or I'll- AH~" His eyes rolled into the back of his skull, lips forming an 'O' as your fingers pinched at his nipples.

These sensations were bizarre, foreign and a mixture of enjoyable and distasteful. Yet Knives couldn't combat against the way you so delicately placed him down, the bed covered in the softest blankets, pillows and much more. There he was able to properly take in your glory, lips pressed against his body, leaving tingling sensations along every spot you kissed.

Oddly, he began to yearn for your touches, eyes hooded as his vision began to blur. It was as if he was seeing the gates of heaven open for the first time, greeted by the beauty of an actual god.

"Calming down now are we? That's good, let that negativity disappear. Open your mouth."

Obediently he obliged, mouth opened as he awaited for whatever you desired from his mortal vessel. That sweet, welcoming mouth engulfed your perked nipple, instinctively sucking the sensitive bud.

You admired how docile he became, the perfumed sheets doing wonders with numbing that mind of his. Now to simply make sure he'll survive the next part.

Knives let out a muffled choking sound, surprised as liquid filled his mouth. Warm, creamy, and slightly addictive as you smirked. Already his cock grew hard, prodding into your stomach, but he wouldn't have a chance to use it.

No, you had something much more special in mind.

Once freed from your little pets obedient feeding, you flipped Knives over as he gasped for air, shuffling his ass in the air. Ignoring how he cried out in protest, clawing at those feather filled pillows, you spread his cheeks apart spitting against his puckering hole.

"The hell are you doing!? I thou-"

"Then you thought wrong. I'm sorry, but even though you're so adorably obedient, I still unfortunately have to punish you." You looked saddened at the prospect of turning down an opportunity to feel that cock inside yourself, a wasted opportunity truly.

"Wha-what the hell do you even mean?" Knives shuddered, ceasing all resistance to look up at you, his expression shocked and confused.

You simply offered a pitying smile. "For being so cruel to my sweet humans, you must be punished. I promise I'll try to make it enjoyable, for you that is! I know I'll be having a blast!'"

That sweet laugh was no longer sweet like candy. No. It held something more daunting beneath it, and Knives began to whimper pathetically.

For years he considered himself a god, a being of higher power that could crush blasphemors under his feet. But now, he realised the unfortunate, cruel truth. He was simply another pawn in a greater being's plan, a true god, one that deceived him into a false sense of security and pleasure.

How the hell was he going to explain his inability to walk straight the following morning?

Knives gasped out a strangled cry, knees touched together as your cock began filling him. It was massive, already stretching him to his absolute limits. Yet no matter how much he cried, begged for you to allow him time to adjust, he was met with that taunting laughter.

"And how many times did my creations beg for you to stop? Too many times to count, so you won't receive any mercy from me. No matter how much you squeeze me, just think you'll be rewarded afterwards, when you've received your fair punishment."

Stomach swelling with your cock buried deep inside him, his own leaking copious amounts of cum. From merely stretching him, Knives had already came twice, you felt your stomach flutter with how much you were going to ruin him.

You let out a hum, the view wasn't all that satisfying. Not when he insisted on burying his face into your pillows, hiding the shame from his predicament.

Gently, you flipped him around, his moans music to your ears. Finally you could see your cock, stuffed deep inside his ass. And what a sight it was.

Slowly you began moving, your thrusts soft and slow, thumbs kneading his stomach until he groaned. Just feeling your own cock through those chiselled abs was pure bliss, but seeing his tiny cock squirt juices against himself was even better.

Knives became quite vocal, moaning constantly as his insides were rearranged. Drool pooled around the corners of his mouth, tears staining his beautiful, pale cheeks. The best part was how his skin shone a vibrant blue, those patterns glowing as overstimulation overwhelmed him.

You couldn't help but to trace those patterns, fingers brushing against his skin, Knives squirming under your touches. Your lips pressed against his, tongue snaking its way into his mouth, tasting every crevice you could reach. Unaware you were suffocating the poor plant.

A single string of saliva kept you two connected, that and your thrusting cock in his ass. Still, you decided that his own could use some attention.

Leaning down, your stomach pressed against Knives sprawled out body, crushing him beneath you. Each thrust rubbed his cock against your navel, earning more vocal affirmations that your toy was at least feeling good.

As you began to feel close, back arching as your pace quickened, you forgot all about how small Knives was compared to you. So you may have accidentally crushed him slightly under your breasts, chasing your high as he milked you for all you're worth. His voice muffled, nails clawing at your tits as you harshly fucked his ass.

Even when you released, coming deep into the pits of his guts, your pace never ceased. How could it when it felt so good, feeling his insides lubed from your seed, filling him like an eclair.

Of course, once he was contently filled, you did free him. Unfortunately your sweet pet was unconscious from lack of air, but you did warn him about his punishment. A shame he wasn't awake for the finale.

"A pity," You sighed, sitting back to admire your work. "Until we meet again, my dear false god."

When Knives awoke, the first thing that greeted him was excruciating pain. Everything was burning in absolute agony, and he was covered in stale cum, his own and what you left stuffed inside him, leaking from his loose ass.

He desperately wanted to hate you, curse you from the pits of this hell. Only he couldn't, left to pout at his false hatred to the goddess that finally put him in his place.

Perhaps he'll keep torturing your so called 'precious creations', if it meant to feel you flushed against his skin, those touches against his markings.

Just the thought of you had his stomach churn, cock ache and mind fog with the sound of your heavenly laughter.

A/N: Hope you enjoyed Anon, I apologise I got a little carried away. Love you all and thank you sm for all the support I truly appreciate it.

[selfproclaimedunicorn]

Write me a fic: Per our convo yesterday. I must ask for Regency!Griffith and his meltdown over falling in love in the most reforming your local Rake type way 🧍‍♂️🫡

this 100000000% got away from me & it is now only tangentially what you asked for. I mean, what you asked for is in there, but I couldn't decide which idea I liked more so I had to string them together & now it's a 4.6k word monstrosity.

Griffith paced, mind addled so that he coursed with the nervous energy that apparently plagued most of the men from his mother’s side of the family. It was as unfair as his current situation. “If you keep that up, you’ll wear a rut into the floor.” Aegon mused as he lifted his glass of brandy, examining the amber liquid in the light streaming through the windows of Thorn Hall’s parlor. He’d made himself quite comfortable, sprawled out on one of the sofas to the point he’d made Griffith’s discarded coat slide off the arm and onto the floor. He stopped and stared at his cousin, gray eyes wide with indignation and the wild concern that so preoccupied him. Aegon giggled over the rim of his snifter before downing more than was even half appropriate for a single sip. Griffith clenched his fists, every muscle in his hands flexing. “Would it kill you to be serious for five minutes?!” He snapped. Annoyance with his best friend could at least be identified and be used as an easy target to let out the building steam of whatever issue had his stomach in knots.

“You’re well and truly in a hobble, aren’t you?” Aegon sat up properly now, “Tell me what the trouble is.”

“Mya Redfort is the trouble. At this point in seduction, I would have at least gotten my cock sucked, and yet she is resisting every attempt at anything further than flirtation–it isn’t like I have not charmed her, but I am getting nothing from it!”

Aegon set his snifter on a low table near the sofa and leaned forward, a contemplative look on his face as he rested his chin in his hand, a finger tapping at his cheek. He’d only been married for a year, a decision reached in the immediate aftermath of their friend-and-cousin’s marriage to his sister, and his own previously similar behavior and thought patterns still rang fresh in his mind. Griffith began pacing again, running a hand through his dark brown curls as he tried to puzzle out his problems with and about Mya Redfort.

“I feel sick. Why is nothing working? You will tell me plainly if I have lost my edge, won’t you?”

“You? Griff, you could never lose your edge! What you need to do, is you just need to shift focus. Mya isn’t receptive, so there is no reason to keep going back. Why not set your sights on that Linderly girl with the–”

Griffith stopped his pacing immediately, his stare hard when he looked at his friend again. “How dare you.”

It was silent in the room after that, Aegon blinking slowly as Griffith felt his stomach drop. Realization set in far too late, and he hated it. Or, no–vexed as he was, he could not hate anything that had to do with Mya.

“One Miss Redfort has tamed her local rake it would seem.” Aegon pressed his lips together to try and stifle it, but all he managed was making his grin look ridiculous and tight.

He pointed at his friend, eyes blown wide once more. “Egg–”

“Welcome to the brotherhood! Interesting one to be a part of, quite cozy though. Provides for a very reliable–”

“I am not going to make a fool of myself over Mya like you did with Abrogail.”

“I did not make a fool of myself!” He stood up, squaring his shoulders to try and make himself look more imposing. It did not do a terribly effective job when he was trying to stand toe to toe with Griffith. Aegon was a good five inches shorter and cut a far less dramatically proportioned figure.

“You could not eat, you could not sleep. You eloped with her weeks after Stannis married your sister because you knew whatever Aunt Alicent was trying to arrange to curb your appetites would not make you as happy as they looked. I sat in this very parlor and watched you carry on in calf-love like some kind of barely grown boy-man who'd never known a woman in his life!”

It was silent in the parlor again as all the bluster slowly left Aegon. He sucked his teeth, hands coming to his hips as he looked up at the ceiling.

“I did carry on, didn't I?”

“Yes.”

He paused again, his gaze leveling with Griffith’s once more. Aegon worked his jaw, just as contemplative as before, and then his lilac eyes lit up. Something had struck him, and all Griffith could do was hope that it was brilliant.

“I do not know how much longer I can hold out.” Mya moaned as she slid further down into the chair beside Rhea’s dressing table, her dress riding up to show her ankles and the pink, embroidered slippers she wore.

“It is taking so much longer to get Griffith to fall for you than it feels like it should be.” Abby mused, her elbow propping on her crossed arm so she could put her cheek in her hand. She furrowed her brows, her small mouth pursing into a thoughtful pout.

“My brother is not so easy to wrap around one's finger as Aegon was,” Adrienne rebutted, her tone harsh and clipped, “he is as pig-headed as our mother.”

“I’d be surprised if he was even capable of being aware of any feelings he developed for someone.” Aerea’s words were softer, more airy, than her twin sister’s. That was the only indication the older of them was even paying attention, she seemed more preoccupied with walking her fingers up one of the poster’s of Rhea’s bed.

“You talk as if Griffith has ever felt anything more complex for a woman than lust or brotherly protectiveness,” Rhea said.

Aerea shrugged and leaned against Rhea, her trail up the bedpost left abandoned. “I know him well enough to guess.”

“If the two of you only have negative things to say about your brother, why are you helping me to win his committed affection?”

“Because we like you, and you mean a good deal to our cousins.” Aerea was still leaning hard against her.

“And because it will be better for our brother in the long run if he settles down, and better for us if he stops tarnishing the reputation of our half of the family. I don’t want to be the sister of the man who has ruined every woman he comes in contact with.”

“I am sure it has nothing to do with how good and romantic a story Griffith’s taming would make, right Adrienne?” Rhea teased, bringing color to her cousin’s cheeks. She turned away quickly, trying to hide her flush from the room full of women.

“Friendship with Rhea and Helaena and Abby, and not sullying your debuts with his reputation, and good stories; right, good, motivations in order. Can someone please help me figure out how to make Griffith Tyrell fall in love with me so I can stop pining? I want to kiss him so badly that I am fit to burst, and you two said I should not even do that!”

“Because that is how he will ensnare you, and the next thing you know you are one more in his long string of abandoned lovers, and no one gets what they want except him.”

Mya sighed tiredly. She was resigned to something, although Rhea could not be sure if it was to “her fate” of eternally trying to win Griffith over, or to subjecting herself to whatever the twins told her to do. Whichever it was, both would be over soon. He was as stubborn as his sisters said, that much was true, but he was not completely without all good sense. If Abby had been able to win Aegon over and reform him from his rakish ways, then Mya could do the same for Griffith. He was no worse, he was just craftier and less aware of his own heart.

“What we need to do is plan one big, grand moment that will make him realize if he has fallen for you or not. If we can make this Griffith’s idea, and if he becomes aware of it all at once, he will have to do something about it. That is his way after all,” Rhea proposed.

“Rhea is right!” Aerea sat up all at once, making her wince as she shouted. She shoved her younger cousin's shoulder, grumbling how she hurt her ears.

“Oh, yes!” Abby perked back up at that, her pout turning into a grin that spread across her freckled face, “That is brilliant, Rhea. Between all of us, we will find a way to make Griffith jealous.”

“I did not say to make him jealous.” Rhea clarified, skeptical of Abby’s trail of thought.

“No, but what better way to go about your suggestion is there?” She rebutted, doubling down on her plan of playing to Griffith’s jealousy.

Rhea ran her tongue over her teeth. There wasn't a better way; her father, Aegon, Aemond, even Stannis; none of them were immune to such feelings, so neither was Griffith. Surely. So if there was a surefire way to know if all their long attempts at getting him to love Mya in a truer way than he told all the other young women had paid off while he simply stubbornly clung to the known of his old ways, it would be to see if he got possesively jealous towards her affections.

“Alright Abrogail, what do you propose?”

“Nothing yet, we need a place and time for me to really get a good plot that is likely to work.”

“The ball Lady Johanna is hosting to try and suss out good matches for her girls,” Mya offered, her tone so casual it could have been an off-handed remark, “because it is not like her husband is trying terribly hard to look.”

“Because Lord Jason Lannister is a man with very little going on in his mind beyond his own importance,” Adrienne quipped. Her opinion of her third cousin mirrored every other member of her grandmother’s family, and if it was not so funny to see him live up to those opinions by bumbling through social interactions, a trifle disguised and riding high off his own pomp, Rhea would have felt bad for the man.

“Oh, yes! That is perfect!” Abby took a few steps away from where Mya sat, her hands clasped in front of her chest as a dreamy look entered her eyes, “We will all make sure you are absolutely incomparable, and as soon as we have eyes on Griffith and know he is aware of your presence, you will dance with someone else. A big show must be made of it too, he must see you can easily replace his spot on your dance card. All of the spots, even! He shan’t even have a chance with you tonight unless he begs, because Mya Redfort is not so easily won over.”

“I like your plan, but what if whoever I dance with instead gets the wrong idea and thinks I do want to replace Griffith?”

“Dance with Stannis. The threat of you being willing to do something besides pining for Griffith the whole night is still there, but he is already married and is head-over-heels for Helaena.”

“Rhea, that is so brilliant I could kiss you!”

“Remember Baldric, subtlety is key.” Griffith whispered in his younger cousin's ear before gently pushing him in the direction of the Lannister girls. Whether Baldric was determined to follow in his and Aegon’s footsteps, or start off as seriously as his brother did not matter. Subtlety in his advances and flirtations had served Griffith well, and so it would serve his young protege as he was thrust onto society.

Griffith only made a brief glance towards his cousin as he greeted Lady Johanna's two oldest girls; he was interested in Baldric's progress, but he could hear about it later. He had plans for the night…or well, he had Aegon’s plans (their wording altered slightly so as to be about Mya Redfort instead of Abrogail). This night was for pulling out all the stops, for wooing his blonde beauty and finally winning a kiss “to spur him” into telling her how besotted he was–as if he were so overcome in the moment he had to tell her right then, and had not been fretting for two days over his sudden reform.

Griffith breezed through the crowd, gray eyes sweeping across every gathered face until he saw her. Her gown was red, it usually was at these sorts of functions, with puffed white sleeves and a bodice that seemed to act more as a shelf to push her breasts up than anything else. Tight, blonde curls framed her face, and a comb with red roses held her bun in place. He would have thought Mya looked beautiful at any given point on a Tuesday morning, flushed from laughter at some conspiratorial secret she shared and in one of the day dresses she always wore, her gloveless fingers stained from eating too many raspberries, but tonight she made Griffith nearly forget to breath. If it were not improper, he would be her partner for every dance so that no one else could.

He plucked two champagne flutes from the tray a servant held as he passed by on his way to where Mya stood with his cousins. Appearing effortlessly out of the crowd, her first drink of the night already on offer, was all part of the plan. It was not Griffith being a besotted fool like Aegon. 

“Miss Redfort.” 

Her green eyes, already large and expressive, were wide as she looked up at him. Mya was already flying her colors, her cheeks subtly red and undoubtedly warm. Her pretty, pink mouth opened with a false start, and she pressed her lips together for a thoughtful moment before properly saying anything.

“It is very good to see you this evening, Mister Tyrell,” her eyes flickered to the glass he held out towards her, “and it is thoughtful of you to already be seeing to my needs.”

“I am nothing but thoughtful. And in my thoughtfulness, I came to the idea that, once you were done of course, I could have the honor of your first dance of the evening.”

“My first dance has already been promised to Stannis.”

His head whipped towards his cousin, who looked a bit bewildered for a moment. Then, Stannis’s eyes met Griffith’s, and an easy smile (an expression that would have looked as at home on his younger brother) spread across his face. He had been told the plan, both he and Baldric had because it was the way of things, Stannis knew Griffith was to woo Mya as an excuse to tell her everything. Surely he would not dare be overcome by one of his rare moods of mischief now. His having no taste for “such games” could not mean he would throw a rub in the way, because that would be participating.

“Indeed it has. Sorry, Griff.”

Helaena slipped her hand from the crook of Stannis’s elbow, and he offered his hand to Mya. Griffith seethed as his lady placed her hand atop his cousin’s and let herself be led away. Rhea and Abby giggled as they leaned into each other, and his mouth turned down into a tight, visible frown. Neither of those two were getting the champagne, that was certain, and so Griffith shoved it towards Stannis’s wife. Helaena either did not know or did nor care about what was going on, and happily took the delicate flute of sparkling wine from him.

Rhea grinned, every bit as smug as any of Griffith’s company was capable of. “Why, Griffith–”

He did not wait for whatever Rhea was going to say, silently stalking further into the ballroom so as to continue watching Mya and Stannis. And heavens but Mya was graceful, even if she was dancing with another man. Griffith’s nose scrunched, that should be him she glided about with. What good was a dance with Stannis, anyhow? He was married already and not even half the catch Griffith was. Or, no, that was a disservice to both Helaena and, under circumstances where his head was clearer, his friend; Stannis was not half as good a catch for Mya. He was perfect for Aegon’s sister though, strange as she might be at times.

“You are upset.”

“Shit!” He startled so that champagne sloshed over the rim of his glass. Griffith would never know if it was not being able to hear Helaena’s approach over the music and the gossip, or if it was just her silent skulking that made her able to sneak up on him.

“You are not doing a good job at hiding it,” she continued, voice bland and matter-of-fact, “you never do. You should not be surprised I noticed.”

“I’m not surprised you–shouldn’t you be giggling with Rhea and Abrogail?”

“I do not think what they’re giggling about is funny.”

“Fair enough.”

“It does seem to have worked though.” Helaena said before taking a sip of the champagne that had been meant for Mya.

“What worked?”

“Abrogail’s plan to make you jealous for Mya’s attention; something about you not noticing feelings, and grand conspiracies they all came up with. It all seems silly to me, and I doubt Stannis would have danced with Mya if he knew.”

They could not have schemes, he had schemes! Throwing propriety to the wind in a move that would have probably made Aegon proud, Griffith downed the whole flute of champagne in one go, finishing it just in time to thrust the now empty glass into the hands of one of the Lannister’s butlers. If Mya was going to try and make him jealous in some gambit to–fiend seize it, who even knew what her gambit was! Either way, two could play at this game, and at the end of the night one of them would get whatever it was they wanted.

“Helaena, would you like to dance?”

“I shall pretend I could not hear you, and that way no one can be offended.”

“I’m offended.”

“At this moment, I don’t think you count.”

Griffith scoffed, even more offended now. What had he done to her?! It was not like he’d ever flirted with Helaena, Stannis had wanted her since they were boys and it would not have been right.

“I don’t want to join whatever games you and Mya are playing at, and I don’t think you should even be engaging in them in the first place. They do not make any sense” Helaena paused to take another sip, and then continued, “you are not dimwitted, although you are acting a bit like it right now, you know how Mya feels about you, Griffith. She feels how every woman you’ve charmed feels about you, and you know how you feel–”

“And how do I feel, Helaena?”

“More strongly than you would ever want to let on, if you actually rising to the bait means anything.” And it did, she knew it did, because Stannis’s wife was obnoxiously insightful. Griffith did not respond, he let her stew in how right she was in silence, and after a moment, Helaena continued.

“I don’t know why you cannot just tell her.”

“Because…because.”

She blinked slowly, her light purple eyes boring into him with all the intensity his sister Aerea’s eyes ever carried, or his Uncle Aemon’s. She was waiting for a justification that would not come, because Griffith wasn’t sure there was one.

“So there is no reason you cannot tell her how you feel towards her, just as I said. And you must know that you never telling her will get neither of you what you desire, and that should she move on because you never commit, that you will never be as happy in your rakish behavior as you were before all of this nonsense that has been going on all season ever since you failed to get Mya into your bed the first time.”

“How does Stannis tolerate you always being right?”

“He does not ‘tolerate’ anything, he likes it.”

Griffith and Helaena stood silently next to each other after that, the both of them watching the dancers sweep across the floor. He watched Stannis and Mya, still burning with jealousy because of his infuriating cousins. Helaena probably watched everyone, or if she was watching Stannis and Mya it was not because of jealousy, but because of how well she liked him.

He took his first steps when the final few notes of the dance began, he knew all of the music from these balls as well as he knew the back of his own hand, or as well as he knew how to elicit sweeter sounds from whatever woman he’d set his sights on. Mya Redfort in this case, and in all the cases for the rest of his life. Because apparently these sorts of things were inevitable for his family.

“Miss Redfort.”

“Oh! Mister Tyrell,” she smiled up at him, just as teasing as it always was these past three months, but more knowing than coy, “I presume you are here for that dance? I shall have to check my card, I believe it is already full, or nearly at least.”

“We must talk.” He cut in quickly before she could continue, his hand involuntarily coming to rest on her upper arm. Her cheeks went red again, brighter than before, and an increasingly familiar spark of hope shone in her green eyes.

“Must?”

“It is important, gravely so…please.”

“Alright.” Her voice was soft as a breath, and Griffith dropped his hand to offer Mya his arm. She slipped her hand into the crook of his elbow, and her smile betrayed her excitement. Mya had fully convinced herself she was getting exactly what she wanted how she had planned to get it, but she didn’t because it was Helaena that got him to speak to her plainly, not whatever she had plotted with Rhea and Abby. Griffith at least had the satisfaction of that.

“I'll make sure Lady Johanna does not see the two of you leaving and send out a chaperone.” Stannis whispered before side-stepping between two gathering groups of dancers and making his way back into the throng of guests in the ballroom. He was a good and reliable chap when nerves or a bout of humor that came at someone else's expense did not overtake him.

Mya clung to Griffith’s arm as they made their way through the ballroom and out the side door that led into the manor’s grounds. The gardens at Casterly weren't much in comparison to Thorn Hall, but they were nice enough, and it wasn't like the pair of them were there to take in the scenery. They remained silent when they stopped in front of the fountain, the only sound the quiet splash of water from the lion's mouth falling into the basin at its stone paws.

Coming up with what to say had felt easy when he schemed with Aegon, it was so much more intimidating to think of what to tell Mya when saying plainly how he felt loomed before him. Griffith had never been so true in any of the pretty words he so easily spun for the women who came before her, and now that he meant everything it felt like every word he’d ever known left him. Mya brought her hands to clasp in front of her chest and turned to face him, it was now or never.

“This evening has not gone at all how I planned it to, but it has still brought me to the ending I wanted…or at least something similar.”

“Us being alone together hardly constitutes you having your way.”

“I did not bring you here to–blast and damnation–Mya Redfort, I love you!”

“Truly?” Even though this was what she'd wanted, she sounded surprised and disbelieving. Mya, it would seem, had not planned this far either.

“Deeply, madly. For months I have thought about, have wanted, no one but you. It is as if you have bewitched me…and it frightens me. I do not know what to do with such sincerity, except to offer it to you and hope you will have it. And–and hope you will have me; mind, body, soul, whatever you desire of me, Mya, you shall have it. I would not want to give myself to anyone else.”

“Oh…oh, Griffith,” her eyes shimmered with unshed tears, but she smiled all the same, “I love you too. I have loved you.” There was weight there. She’d been harboring such affections for him for months at least. Had it been years? He hoped not, Griffith did not like the thought of Mya silently pining as he flirted and fucked his way through dozens for three years; disappointing her as he carried on so. No, he would banish the thought. It didn't matter now. This moment was all that mattered.

He gently cupped her cheek, and she leaned into his touch. “Would you marry me, if I asked?”

“I would. And…and would you stay and still mean all of what you said if I let you kiss me?”

“Wild horses could not drag me away.” His gaze did not break from Mya’s as his hand slid from her soft cheek to her jaw, his thumb resting under her chin so he could tilt her head back. Her eyes were wide and wanting, and she parted her lips as Griffith leaned down to kiss her.

Mya kissed him back, firm and hungry, as her hands came to his chest, her fingers curling into the fabric of his coat as if that would hold him in place forever. As if she needed to go to that much effort.

They were breathless when the kiss broke, and Griffith put his forehead against hers as he gently ran his thumb over her lower lip. His other hand went to her waist, and he wanted desperately to pull her as close as he could, to guide Mya into grinding against him. 

“I love you, Mya.” No amount of times he could tell her would be enough to satisfy him.

“Enough to kiss me again?”

“For that and more.” He did as she bid, teasingly brief, as his hand dropped from her jaw and came to hold her waist like his other. Mya pressed her lips together into a tight frown, her brows furrowing over her pretty green eyes. She released his coat and held his face now, pulling Griffith’s mouth down into hers to kiss him how she had meant.

He smiled into the kiss, truly being in love only changed a handful of things really, and walked Mya backwards until her knees hit the basin of the fountain. She sat there, dragging Griffith with her so he loomed over her.

He leaned on one arm, his hand flat against the smooth stone of the fountain basin and placed close enough to Mya that his thumb was against her hip. His other hand came to her thigh, giving it a brief squeeze through the satiny fabric of her red gown. Griffith would not push her for more than this, he could make himself be satisfied if she wanted to wait for their engagement or even their marriage for anything more intimate, but he could still relish in touching her and silently pray for more. He was still getting what he wanted after all: turning Mya Redfort into Mya Tyrell.

[ghosts-bandwagon]

Your latina Reader x Ghost headcanons are giving me life. Not a request, I just wanted to share these thoughts with you specifically: imagine if Reader is actually good at dancing and likes to perrear hasta el piso ✨ My man would be like 🧍‍♂️ while watching you give it your all in sweatpants on a Saturday morning while blasting Guatauba at full volume, but also horny on main and already planning on how to ask you if it's possible hacer el sinrespeto with a reggaeton playlist playing lmaooo

Also, imagine if Reader cursed A LOT in Spanish, and he asked Alejandro or Rudy what something meant in English and they're both like 😬 Ghost, te tenemos noticias, your wife curses like a sailor

If Reader happens to be on the TF141 or happens to ever meet Alejandro and Rudy, those three would be talking shit and chisme upon meeting and meanwhile Ghost and Soap would be trying to understand everything with their basic Spanish, while listening to Reader give Ghost weirder and weirder pet names every time she mentions him (my esposo, mi vato, mi amorcito, mi fantasmita, and then she refers to him as mi chikistrikis)

Finally, she sometimes calls him Gasparín as a joke pet name (and it kinda grew on him)

Also, imagine if latina Reader and Simon had a kid, trying for the baby to grow bilingual

Take care y espero que tengas bonita noche 😘✨

MI AMOR!!! MI VIDA!!! HERMOSA!!!! I AM LIVING!!!!

This made my night no cap 😭 I fucking love this!!!! I can totally imagine TF141 reader making a group chat with Rudy and Ale, and renaming it “Los Tres Pendejos” and it’s all chisme with selfies, recipes, and song recs all mixed in. Soap and Ghost try to make sense of it as they peek over your shoulder but fuck if they can even catch a single sentence they can understand lmaooo

I DARE you to try and tell me that Ghost doesn’t pick up on your curse words and winds up accidentally peppering them in when his gun jams, or he’s struggling to finish up a set, or the maldito pen ran out of ink 😠