#how cuti fights for him ahhhh

[someshipsneversail]

[slytherinshua]

IM SO EXCITED YOU DONT EVEN KNOW!!! AGAIN, CONGRATS!! ITS ALL WELL DESERVED AND IM HAPPY I CAN BE HERE AND WAYXH U GROW BC!!! IR TALENT SHOULD BE APPRECIATED!!

now to the req…. hehehe….. let me tell u how excited i was when i saw you’re taking k-dramas KMG!!!! so obv…

YUL FROM AOS!!! yul my beloved he’s such a cutie patootie– anyways… fluff: 39, 53 and other: 30!! idk i just feel like it suits him!!

MASTER YUL

genre. fluff. master x pupil trope. warnings. kissing. spoilers for aos ig? its not rly set in any particular episode but park jin is still the leader of songrim so i'd say loosely around ep 10-12. pairing. seo yul x fem!reader. wc. 2.1k. a/n. ahhhh axe tysm for requesting smth for yul 😭 our baby 🫶 i kinda got carried away with this and then didn't proof read it so idk how good it is lol but i had fun writing it!!

“Give me one chance. I can hold my own in a fight. I will do anything it takes.” You pleaded, practically begging at the steps of the training centre in Jeongjingak. 

People from low class families, and especially women were never accepted into Songrim Jeongjingak. Everyone in Daeho knew that, and you’d have to be a fool or stupidly brave to try to say otherwise. You were probably both given that you were standing by the doors of the training centre at the moment, your slightly scuffed up clothing and long hair giving you no favours. 

You wanted to blame your father for your current situation, but since he was currently cold in his grave and you respected him too much, you didn’t let your thoughts wander in that direction. 

He had always insisted that you needed to know how to defend yourself, starting at a young age. After years of burdensome training, you started to finally feel the rush and satisfaction of a fight. After years of complaining about the lessons your father taught you, you finally wanted to learn spells. You wanted to use the energy inside your body. You desperately wanted to feel like you were useful, powerful, capable. 

You excelled in all the ladylike areas, from sewing and needlework, to gardening, to singing and dancing thanks to your mother. But they were all just so boring. Your habit of spending your entire day in the public library reading all the books on spells started when you were 14. It only grew over the next few years until your father knew you wanted more than he could offer you.

He wasn’t a highly skilled mage, and in his lifetime had not needed to progress beyond Jipsu, the ability to gather the energy of water. You had mastered that years ago and had progressed to tackling the skill of Ryusu. You tried hard to master it on your own once your father taught you all his lessons, but it was a near impossible task.

You needed a master, but none would accept you as their pupil. After almost every master in the country turned you down for various reasons, you turned to your last option - Songrim.

Face to face with Lord Park, one of the most renowned mages in the capital, and the current leader of Songrim, you held your head high as he refused your pleas.

One look at you had him and the other mages glaring you down and shaking their heads with disapproval. They wouldn’t even give you a chance. Dozens of remarks were thrown at you. You let them pass through one ear and out the other, not letting these men get the chance to see you turn away defeated. You were already risking your pride begging them, but you wouldn’t leave without being able to showcase your skills first. 

“You really think our masters would waste their time and energy on a girl like you with no potential?” One rude young mage sneered, and you bowed your head further, finally feeling your blood boil with rage. You gripped your sword tight enough that your knuckles turned white, resisting the urge to unsheathe it and hold it to his neck. 

I have more potential in my left pinky finger than you or any of your ancestors have had for the past 300 years, you whispered under your breath in spite, making sure it wasn’t loud enough for him to hear it.

You were unaware of a party of mages returning to the training centre at the moment, and the one leading the way seemed to have picked up on what you were mumbling. He stood next to you, a slight smirk playing on his lips as he glanced at you.

“Cha Beom is an asshole, but I wouldn’t waste your words on him.”

You glanced to the side, surprised that someone was taking your side. As you looked him over, you were sure you had seen him somewhere before. His face was fair and handsome and his clothes were neat. He looked pristine and well-mannered, but more than anything, he looked like he stuck to the rules. He was probably the last person you pictured sticking up for someone like you. You also thought that the word ‘asshole’ didn’t fit coming from his mouth.

“I’ll spar with her. If she can beat me, let her train here. If she can’t, then I’ll train her myself.” The mage said confidently. Your eyebrows furrowed at his brazenness. Wouldn’t he get reprimanded for speaking such an outlandish thing?

But he didn’t.

You watched as Lord Park sighed and waved the young mage off. An older man, Master Heo, started to protest, but upon Lord Park’s clear disinterest in continuing the situation, he was silenced.

“Do what you wish with her, Yul. Train her yourself.”

The mage smiled at Lord Park and bowed before turning to you, “So, Y/n. Let’s see those skills, hm?”

“How do you know my name?”

“I know a lot of things.” He remarked.

“Do you really have what it takes to train me? Aren’t you just another mage at Jeongjingak?” You questioned with uncertainty, earning a scoff from the young mage. 

“You don’t know who I am, do you?” He asked in disbelief. 

“Should I?”

He nodded, “Let me explain it. I have always been the top student at Jeongjingak; I mastered all the books, reached Chisu in a short amount of time, and people always come to me when they need help. That is me, Seo Yul.”

“Ah… I see. You’re smarter than you look, then.” You concluded, walking forward.

Yul paused, eyes blinking and head turned to the side in thought, “Is that a compliment for my intelligence or an insult for my looks?” He called out to you, making you turn around again.

“It was meant to be neither, though I suppose you are… decent.”

“Decent?”

“Mm… Your looks aren’t exactly my style, but even I can’t deny that you’re not too bad.” You continued, smile widening every time his face further scrunched in confusion. Teasing him was more fun than you thought.

“Is this how you’re going to treat your new master?” 

“Why? You don’t like it?”

“You’re just very… blunt.”

“I’m sure you’ll get used to it, Master Yul.” 

Yul’s eyes widened slightly, the formality of the new name was far from the regular “Young Master Seo” he was used to hearing. Hearing it from you brought him some strange satisfaction and warmth. It was strange.

//

Yul was a hard master to please. More often than not, you felt like he was disappointed with you because he always kept a straight face. He always forced himself to hide his affection for you for fear that it would distract from your training, which frustrated you. You clinged onto the moments where he let his true emotions shine through just a bit. The lingering stares and little smiles— from those small moments you were sure that he was actually a warm person, and not the cold, strict master like he appeared on the outside. You just needed to find a way for him to break the facade. 

Because he was so skilled himself, impressing him only happened once in a blue moon. You tried your best, and improved quickly under his guidance. He would train you rigorously every weekday after his own training at Jeongjingak. Usually you would be by the river, using the rough and difficult terrain to your advantage. It definitely helped with your dexterity and swiftness. After just a few months, you had mastered Ryusu.

The bright smile on Yul’s face when you were finally able to gain energy from the water was one you would never forget. He even laughed a bit, and you swore you were happier about making him happy than progressing in your training.

Your love for teasing Yul never went away. His expressions were just too adorable to make you want to stop, and you felt that they gave him a small break from the pressure he was under as the eldest son of the Seo family. 

You were thinking about all your little habits you had picked up around Yul, when it hit you. How you felt that warm fluttering feeling in your stomach when you saw him smile, and the heat crept onto your cheeks whenever he had to touch your hand to show you a proper placement for a spell. That wasn’t a normal master-pupil thing. You liked him. 

As you packed up your supplies one late night by the river, his perfect face kept flashing in your mind. His cute smile curving on his lips like when you mastered another spell, the subtle curve of his nose, the plush berry colour of his lips, the softness in his eyes. He was truly one of the most pure humans you had ever come into contact with, and your adoration for him only grew everyday. 

“Stupid, stupid, stupid.” You scolded yourself under your breath. Now that you were aware that you were in love with him, how much harder would it be to go to training with him? You were sure you were going to be flustered and tripping your own two feet the next time you tried to work on your spells with him.

“Who are you calling stupid?”

You flinched and turned around, seeing Yul sitting in one of the trees by the bank, watching you pack up intently. 

“Myself. Why’re you still here?” You asked, cheeks heating up when he jumped down from the tree smoothly and crouched down next to you to help you pack the rest of your things.

“Because my pupil is still here even though the sun has already set long ago.” He said, a smile playing on his lips but he suppressed it like always. His hand moved to pick up the bottle of medicinal herbs you had to put in your bag and his fingers brushed against yours, your cheeks heating up even more at the action. In a panic, you realised the moon shining down on you was just enough light for Yul to pick up on the colour of your cheeks. You silently cursed him for noticing every little detail about you.

“Wait… Are you blushing?” He asked with uncertainty. You backed away slightly, whispering a hushed “no” and hoping he would drop the subject. You weren’t used to this side of him, and your nerves grew every time his face inched closer to yours. How was he always so calm and collected while able to make you so flustered?

“Let me check your breathing technique, Y/n.” Yul said quietly, hand gently resting on your stomach. You looked up at him with wide eyes, breathing in short fast puffs. You saw his lips stretch into what looked like a smirk. “Your breathing is completely off. What did I tell you about practising it even when you’re not training?”

“I… I’m sorry. I must’ve… forgotten.” You mumbled, mind spinning as you wondered why his hand was still touching you.

“Do I need to remind you more often?” He asked, head tilting as he looked at you fondly. You stayed silent, wide eyes staring into his like he had put you in a trance— as if you were incapable of looking away.

Your eyes moved faster than your brain as they flickered down to his lips for a split second. If your brain was able to make a sound, it would be screaming at you right now. Why the heck would you do that? There was no way Yul wouldn’t catch on to it. You’re screwed.

You couldn’t think or even breathe when you saw him leaning in, eyes blinking closed until his soft lips finally met yours. Your cheeks burned as you kissed him back. You couldn’t think about anything but him - the feeling of having him so close, your hearts racing in sync, him pulling you closer by the waist. Your hands moved on their own, gently carding through the soft hairs at the back of his head until he eventually pulled out, still holding you close.

You caught your breath and calmed your racing heart, whispering a soft, “...Did you just kiss me?”

“Yes.” He smiled. You wondered when he got the power to steal all your confidence.

“Can you… do it again?” 

“I didn’t know you liked it that much.” He smiled, eyes glimmering, moonshine reflecting off his face, "I guess my looks are a bit more than just decent?" He teased as he leaned in once more, pressing another soft kiss to your lips.

[crushedsweets]

OK I NEED TO CLEAR MY ASKBOX

IM JUST GONNA ANSWER A TON OF THEM HERE SO I DONT CLOG UP MY FEED....

hi >.<

this is so fucking sweet i remembered how happy i was when i first got my car. i cried everyday for a week straight because i was so happy. very glad yall got to watch me get my first car. i spend over an hour in her every day commuting now. LMFAOOO (i named her lindsay btw) ((after tdi lsinday)). im so sorry im late but thank you so much this meant sm !!! <3

you asked me this in august im evil oh my god. anyway i aagree. but i am always inclined to forever think he's a midwest emo guy. twin sized mattress forever

SHE NEEDS AND DESERVES SO MANY.

im immediately inclined to say clocky or toby the second i see time and fire mentions. so ticciwork. my clocky is often a bit messy so she'd be pissed and angry and upset over the sort of war she's found herself in, especially as she sees toby just falling deeper into it. 'my god, was i oblivious?' when she finally realizes toby will always, always put Slenderman before her. frustrating. 'hell stays hungry for a world so weak' natalie is hungry for a good world, but she thinks everyone is too weak for goodness, meanwhile toby is hungry for power so he can make everyone else seem weak. etc. 'they only want you to bleed' they being slendy, operator, zalgo, etc etc etc... power, being a pawn, fighting, using humans as toys in a battlefield, etc etc.. yeah

RELEASE ME JOEY

i genuinely think nina is a really good influence on so many of the creeps. like theyre all assholes, traumatized, refuse to believe in the good in the world, etc etc. but nina is traumatized and still kickin. she comes in like ^_^ hello chat. and i think that, while its still important to feel the shitty feelings, it's really grounding to see someone whos just so .. able to be happy. idk. someone who SEEKS joy, rather than expects it to fall into their lap, and blames the world when it doesnt

this si perfect idk why i forgot about bats for him. gotta get back into this idea

AHHH OK I WILL DO MORE EVENTUALLY i just wanna say thank yewww i think theyre such a good sibling dynamic. like little brothers and big sisters and both being little assholes to eachother but would die for the other. idk. ugh. important to me.

actually this sounds really sweet..... thats funny cuz i was JUST talking to a friend about who i would have EJ go endgame with if i had to, but i couldnt settle on anyone. but liu seems like a good fit for ej. i think they'd be super sweet

ANON ME TOO AHHHH ITS LITERALLY MY FAVORITE FUCKING THING EVER. I DONT GAF ABOUT EVIL MEAN 'CANON' SLENDER I LOVE WHEN HE'S A DAD AND WORRIES AND STRESSES. IEPFB AND KASTOWAYS SLENDY>

AH THANK YOU!!! he reminds me of my little cousins HAHA theyre like 10-14 right now and theyre all cuties.... just playing roblox and being mischievous...

THIS IS ABOUT THE BLUSHING NAT DRAWING ISNT IT AHAH OMG THANK YOU!!! i think shes so cute. i know she cant handle compliments. she's either deadpanned 'thanks' or just covers her face and says 'shut up' cuz she doesnt know what to do.

I LOVE HER TOO!!!

GOOD NEWS THEN ive drawn her a handful of times since u sent this HAHA TYSM

you sent like... natobina i think... ok tbh kinda slaps

OK REAL but also when i read it i keep reading it as 'cochina' and i cannot bring myself to name the throuple that </3 HAHA

TBH AHAHA I SEE IT. TOBYS AMETHYST GARNETS NATALIE AND NINA IS STEVEN.

i want jeff to ache in his loneliness

i need to draw connie asap but also THANK YOU SO MUCH AGAIN FOR THE CAR CONGRATS I REALLY APPRECIATE IT IM SO HAPPY I LOVE MY CAR SO MUCH i gotta go vaccuum her..

shes such a cat to me. feline. of sorts, if you will

also good news for you anon, i have also drawn her an ungodly amount of times since youve sent this. LOL

THEYRE MY ANGELS I HAVE MORE OF THEM !!! I LOVE THEM!! AHHHGGG

literally the second that people tell me i made them start to like clocky i am overwhelmed with joy. i feel so much ache when people aren't fond of her bc shes so fucking cool and such a good character and so much fun. so sad that 2015 era creepypasta fandom destroyed her. but im here to fix it...

IM SORRY ANON I BARELY DRAW HIM HES JUST SO BOYISH I LAUGH EVERYTIME I SEE HIM FKAHAHAAH OK OKOK ILL CHANGE ILL DRAW HIM I SWEAR

I REMEMBER WHEN I FIRST STARTED DOING EMOJI ANONS BAHAHA u guys r funny

incredibly. happy. to do this to u.

nope! im not too interested in the 2021 nina just cuz i feel like i've seen that character concept many times (not just in jane), BUT if i had to do my own intepretation of her, 2021 nina would be INCREDIBLY immature in like. not a childish way, but an entitled, angry-fueled adult who cannot comprehend anyone else's thoughts/feelings. and thus, would despise OG nina (although within reason, OG nina idolizes the person who killed her family) . but even if there wasnt a good reason to dislike OG nina, she'd be mean. and OG nina would be mad and bitch. and theyd theyd fight. HAHA

I-IF...???????? ANON?

HELD TO THE FUCKING BRIM

[wzrd-wheezes]

A blurb for Fred being a cutie when you’re upset w him !!! PleaseEEE

It was a friday night and all of Y/N’s house were up in the common room celebrating the teams recent quidditch win, except for Y/N and Fred… Their Friday night plans had turned into sitting in the Potions class room scrubbing out dirty cauldrons.

“Hey! Why’re you being all grumpy.” Fred pouted, poking Y/N’s cheek.

“I wonder why!” Y/N said sarcastically, “It might be because it’s the second time you’ve got me a detention this week.”

“Would it make you feel better if I told you it was all part of an elaborate plan so I could get to spend more time with you?” Fred smiled, nudging her arm. Y/N looked across at him quickly, raising an eyebrow and then looked away. She scrubbed at the cauldron she was cleaning furiously.

“C’mon,” Fred whined, “you can’t be upset with me forever can you?” Y/N remained silent.

“Okay… I see how it is.” Fred said, narrowing his eyes and looking at her “It’s crazy how you still look pretty even when you’re scowling like that.”

“I’m not scowling!” Y/N defended.

“Have you tried telling your face that?” he laughed, “it’s looking pretty scowly to me.”

Y/N looked at him out the corner of her eye, trying to hold back a smile. She knew deep down that she couldn’t stay upset with him for long.

“Ahhhh there we go!” he smirked, “I knew it wouldn’t take long to get you to smile”

“Shut up.” Y/N said, still fighting the smile that was tugging at the corners of her mouth.

“Okay let’s make a deal. Our detention is up in 15 minutes yeah?” Fred said, “You can be grumpy with me for the next 15 minutes and then after that you’re leaving the grumps in this classroom while we go and enjoy the party. Deal?”

“Deal.” she agreed.

[empresskadia]

An Uplifting John Post

Inside the debriefing room, the hum of electronic screens casting a pale glow over metallic surfaces, John sat isolated at one end of a long, sleek table. His fingers traced the cold metal, the MIRAGE armor standing ominously by the corner—its metallic-green sheen almost mocking in the silence. Across from him, the leaderboard flickered, relentless in its truth. His name anchored at the bottom, a constant reminder of his perceived inadequacies among the Spartan-IIs.

The door hissed open, and Fred entered, his posture relaxed but his eyes sharp. “Still staring at those numbers, John?” he asked, pulling up a chair with a scrape that echoed slightly in the sterile room.

John’s gaze lingered on the screen before meeting Fred’s. “It’s hard not to. Every number, every stat… they tell a story, Fred. Just not the one I’d hoped for,” he replied, his voice a blend of resignation and defiance.

Fred chuckled softly, leaning back. “You know, numbers aren’t the whole story, Chief. They’re just… part of the narrative.”

John scoffed lightly, his eyes narrowing slightly. “Easy for you to say. You’re not the one ranked lowest. You didn’t lose every training match or get disqualified for not playing by the rules,” he said, his words tinted with a hint of bitterness.

“I didn’t save the universe either,” Fred countered, his tone serious now. “You did that. Not us. Not the ‘top ranked’ Spartans. You, John.”

The room fell silent again, the weight of Fred’s words hanging between them. John’s eyes drifted back to his armor. “I wear this,” he gestured towards the MIRAGE-IIC, “because I need it. It’s the best because I’m… not.”

“Or,” Fred interjected, “it’s the best because you are. Because you can handle it. John, we might outshoot you or outrun you in drills, but none of that compares to what you’ve done in the field. You think strategically, you adapt. You survive. And more importantly, you make sure others do too.”

John’s gaze softened, reflecting a conflict of pride and insecurity. “Maybe. But it’s not the Spartan way, is it? The others, they don’t need gadgets or tricks. They’re just… better.”

Fred stood up, his chair scraping softly against the floor. He walked over and placed a firm hand on John’s shoulder. “Listen, the ‘Spartan way’ is about getting the job done. It’s about protecting humanity, whatever it takes. And you’ve done that more times than I can count. So who cares if you’re not the best shot? You have something none of us can match, John. You’ve got heart. And that’s what saved us all.”

John looked up, meeting Fred’s gaze. There was a spark in his eyes, a flicker of resolve. “Thanks, Fred. I… needed that.”Fred smiled, giving John’s shoulder a squeeze. “Anytime, Chief. Remember, it’s not about how you start, it’s how you finish. And by my count, you’re finishing on top every time.”

As Fred walked towards the door, he paused and turned back. “Oh, and John? Next time we spar, go easy on me, will you? I might outrank you on that board, but we both know who the real threat is when it comes to a real fight.”

John chuckled, the tension easing from his shoulders as he watched Fred leave. Alone once more, he turned his attention back to the leaderboard, but this time, the numbers seemed less daunting. They were just numbers, after all. And he was Master Chief, the man who saved the universe. That was something no leaderboard could ever truly capture.

AHHHHHH

AHHHH

AHH-

THE JOHN AND FRED CONTENT

kfjvedvue

I'm having a moment, they are just cuties *insert crying face*

[etherealising]

someday i will be caught up on this story, not today, but someday lol. although i almost don’t want to be caught up because i so look forward to reading these chapters and i’ve loved having a new one to read everytime i get the chance.

this crack fic will always be here waiting for you!! right like sometimes you just wanna save things even though you also need to know what happened!!

ooooomph. i felt that one in my chest. you have a stellar way of putting emotions that i’ve felt into words.

honestly writing this fic has made me feel like i knew mikey personally (crazy i know) and so i just write what i think the characters would be feeling lol

STOP IT RN this is so goddamn cutie. nat is such a queen for making sure that this polaroid didn’t get shoved to the back of the closet and got a spot on the mantle as it deserves. i totally understand baby for wanting to just shove it all down, but you’re right, she needs to feel it as it comes so she can process it and move on.

yes nat is baby’s number one supporter and she is just fighting so hard for baby to get through this, like she understands exactly where she’s coming from but she just wants the best for her!

oh goD NOT THE VOICEMAIL. so scared to find out what that entails.

it will be a journey…

holy shit. i knew it was going to be bad but i feel so sad for baby - this is next level stuff. for both her sake and for plot purposes (gots to get her in carmys vicinity) i’m glad she’s back in a place with a support system. AND HER OVERDOSING? she really is spiraling in a dangerous direction. nat(and pete) is the unsung hero of this story, and i didn’t know it was possible but i love her that much more. also i really love how you aren’t trying to sugarcoat any of the dark themes, you’re embracing them and aren’t afraid to get into the nitty gritty reality of it all.

this was a really hard decision for me to make, because like i’ve seen addiction firsthand and what it does to people, so i was like if i’m gonna do this it can’t just be a plot point like there needs to be meaning behind this. i’m still iffy about it, but this fic is kind of a way for me to idk express what being around addicts is like and what it’s like to love them.

this is a beautifully haunting sentence. that is all.

cannot lie genuinely cry everytime i re-read it

ITS HAYDEN WHAT!!! i was worried for baby for a second there. i love that he’s back in this. he was such a stand up guy before and his pretense is going to make carmy have to put in that much more work (if there’s one thing i love it’s a groveling man)

bestie the groveling will be immaculate (and so will the dick measuring contest between these two)

curious to know if you have any face claim for hayden? like this line painted a vivid image of hayden in my brain and i’m curious who you see him as!

okay so i’ve talked about this with another person and my initial image was Danny Ramirez because wowza, but then i watched kick ass and fell back into my Aaron Taylor Johnson Brainrot and we kind of decided on him (specifically in his Tangerine era) but now that I’m responding Miles Teller as bradley Bradshaw could totally fit this too!!!

but if you have any face claim inspo for Hayden i am all ears!!!

we love a self sufficient queen!

right, like girly knows her worth!

ahhhh i’ve been wondering where we were falling back into the story and i LOVE that you chose here, carmy is a bit more established in himself and the bear and the staff will all also be pretty established. can’t wait to see baby and syd interact fr. (i am a lil nervy about claire tho i can’t lie)

yes i wanted to interweave original material into the canon verse, but definitely homeboy’s a little calmer lol. i love syd and I’m so excited for her scenes with baby she is the biggest shipper of barby (second to nat of course)

is that even a good ship name lol

richie absolutely would give the BEST hugs, this is 1000% fucking canon to me. i will die on this hill.

he and Mikey are definitely the go to for hugs and no one can change my mind.

you definitely nailed syds tone - i love it already!

i needed this validation because writing for these characters is so hard especially syd and carmy

stay out of this carmy the adults are talking

he just wants the love of his life to notice him.

yikes so he doesn’t even know? he’s that far removed now? my boy is absolutely going to say something stupid like when her mom died and he DIDNT KNOW. they never learn.

idk how many chances we can keep giving the kid

sometimes i want to punch his sexy little face

punch it and then kiss it all better afterwards.

THIS LINE HAS ME SO GIDDY OH MY GOD. i feel like we just entered act ii of the story and i am beyond excited about it. god this is just so good and i am on the edge of my seat the whole time.

we are definitely in our act ii era and things might just get messier…

chapter four | to burden natalie berzatto

masterlist | ↢ previous chapter | next chapter ↣ |

pairing: platonic!natalie berzatto x f!reader | slight carmen berzatto x f!reader | slight the bear crew x f!reader | male!oc x f!reader |

summary: your lack of competent decision-making after mikey’s death puts natalie in a compromisng position.

warning(s): substance abuse | overdose | grief | self-sabotage | angst | humor as coping mechanism | one mention of ativan | unintentional self-harm | blood | hospitals | scars | mention of treatment centers | rehab | recovery | thoughts of relapsing | appreciation of natalie berzatto | avoidance of grief | selfishness | memory loss | unhealthy grieving mechanisms | PLEASE LET ME KNOW IF I MISSED ANYTHING!

wc: 8.1k

please remeber you are responsible for your own media consumption. if any warnings trigger you DO NOT READ!

The smooth music filtered out of the record player, a rich voice singing through the house painting the atmosphere with a calm vibe. The two occupants were gathered in the living room, sifting through the last of the boxes that contained small decorations and keepsakes. Discussing what would look best where and what should have been left behind in the move.

You looked over your shoulder to check on Nat, her sudden silence cause for concern. Circling over to her you realized what had stolen the words from her lips. You maneuvered to stand behind her, looking over her shoulder at the framed photo in her hands, the two of you silently reminiscing.

You placed your head on her shoulder as she let out a quiet sniffle, her emotions heightened due to her condition. “You looked so beautiful that night,” you let out a quiet laugh before moving to stand next to Nat, eyes still focused on the framed Polaroid in her grip.

It had been a year and it still wasn’t easy to look at any pictures of Mikey without feeling like your chest would cave in. You hadn’t seen this particular picture since his passing, the grief too much, all memories painting your west coast apartment shoved into a nondescript box.

You understood now why it was so important to label your boxes when moving. If the box in front of Nat had some type of label on it, you knew for sure it already would’ve been shoved into the dark recesses of your closet.

“You can just put that one back in the box,” you left Nat’s side to continue going through your box, pulling out the book designated to sit on your coffee table.

Natalie watched you from her side of the living room, a small scowl painting her face as she watched you so easily disregard a memory that had once been so special to you. She looked back down at the picture, your bright smile staring back at her as Mikey and Richie leaned in to kiss your cheeks. A fond memory of the three of you the night of your senior prom.

Looking back at you one last time Nat let out a sigh before walking over to the mantle and setting it on the corner, visible for everyone to see. She understood how much Mikey’s death affected you, but there was no way you could heal from the hurt if you never allowed yourself to live in the uncomfortability of grief. It was something you had to want for yourself.

Nat had half the mind to keep digging through the box, eyes catching on another memory. Not wanting to sour the first night in your new home, she replaced the cover, doing her best to act as though she wasn’t curious about the box of memories.

The doorbell rang as you were looking for a place for the picture of you and your mom at your college graduation. Carefully sitting it on your coffee table you made your way to the door making sure to grab your wallet on the way. You opened the door to see the pizza delivery person standing there, giving them the money and a tip before thanking them.

“Oh that smells delicious,” you laughed as Nat followed behind you to your decent-sized kitchen. The two of you grab plates and a slice of pizza before heading to your couch.

Setting your plate on the coffee table, you left to quickly grab two wine glasses and the sparkling cider Natalie and Pete bought you as a housewarming gift. Stopping to grab a bottle of water from the fridge for Nat just in case the cider upset her stomach before taking your seat on the plush couch.

“I’m happy you’re home Baby.” Your eyes met Nat’s before you moved to pour yourself a healthy amount of sparkling cider, ignoring Nat’s laugh at the full glass in your hands. You raise your glass in a mock toast, at least one of you was happy that you were back.

“I guess it's good to be back. Nice to be around people that care about me,” the grateful smile sent Nat’s way as a form of thank you.

Natalie deserved more than a pathetic smile and both of you knew it.

You had been relatively alright after Mikey’s death, which came as a surprise to everyone. Your impromptu stay in Chicago after the funeral was a way for you to keep an eye on Natalie and Donna, occasionally helping Richie at The Beef when you could.

But you had to return to your own life eventually, and when you did shit spiraled out of control for you.

People always drone on and on about the five stages of grief and how it affects everyone differently, and you never thought that statement to be more true than when you stepped foot in your apartment upon your return from Chicago. Grief is supposed to come and go, you were doing everything that everyone was telling you to do. Following all the steps, checking all the boxes. Forcing yourself to try and heal, to feel your emotions as much as you would allow yourself to.

But at the end of the day, it was just you, an apartment full of memories, a voicemail you were too scared to ever listen to, and the shadow of your grief following behind you.

You experienced all the denial, anger, bargaining, and depression and you waited and hoped for the acceptance to come. But all that ever came was the cycle of grief replaying in your life like a bad dream.

You had thrown yourself into your work, anything to forget about the pain Mikey’s ghost left behind. And when your psychiatrist recommended a prescription to aid with your anxiety, you accepted. Anything to escape the shadow of a man you once knew appearing in your apartment on late nights.

But then the prescription wasn’t enough, and the alcohol you once used to numb everything had lost its edge, your days just turned into functioning as best you could. And then there were times you couldn’t even remember the previous day, the last five minutes, falling asleep on the couch.

You had become dependent; dependent on the alcohol and the drugs, and the way they made things all better for a short time.

And then you had woken up in the hospital one day, with no memories of how you got there, no care for what happened to you.

The figure in the chair next to you helped you to escape the fog in your brain. The woman you had known your whole life looking down at you with a tear-stained face, her hand tightly clutched around yours, her presence all the more confusing.

The silence in the room was too loud for you as you just watched the blonde, the lack of emotion on your face breaking the woman down even more. When the doctor came in to explain what happened it shocked you. Not because of the severity of the situation, but because you couldn’t remember a thing.

The theory was that you had been mixing prescription drugs and alcohol for some time, a truth you already knew and were purposely partaking in.

You were at your apartment after work winding down from the long day, pregaming for a night out with your co-workers. The Ativan you had taken earlier at work already put you at ease. You were trying to get to your patio for some reason but had trouble with the sliding glass door.

Too inebriated to unlock it you had essentially thrown yourself against the glass until it finally gave way to the weight of your body and you ended up face down covered in glass and the pool of your blood.

Not fazed by your injuries you collected yourself, glass and all. Grabbing your keys from the counter leaving to whatever destination you had in mind. Somewhere between removing yourself from the mess of your ruined sliding door and stumbling out into the hallway, you swallowed two more pills.

According to the reports, a neighbor found the mess of your body in the hallway, making it a mere few inches from your door before your body succumbed to the deadly cocktail swirling inside you.

In October of 2022, 8 months after Michael’s death; you would overdose.

You were broken from the haze of memories as you felt a dip in the couch. Natalie came to sit right next to you head resting on your shoulder, you gently laid your head on top of hers. You owed Nat your life.

A quiet sniffle left you, losing the battle to keep your emotions under wraps. “You’ve done so much for me Sug, and I…I’m sorry if I haven’t shown you enough appreciation.” You felt Nat’s arms wrap around you, squeezing you into a side hug as the two of you sat in each other’s presence.

It was no secret that without Natalie and Pete, you might not have been experiencing this moment. You for sure wouldn’t have gotten your shit together if you were still all alone on the West Coast. Nat had gone out of her way to find the best treatment facility on the East Coast for you, it had been decided that you would make the move back to Chicago when you were released.

So while you were away facing the consequences of the darkest moments of your life. Nat was at home picking up the pieces of your life while also trying to keep hers intact, not that you realized or cared back then.

Nat and Pete sold the family home that was still in your mom's name, nobody needed to ask to know that it wasn’t healthy for you to live in or across the street from a museum of memories. The couple got you a good deal on a quaint home not too far from them, the leftover money put towards the rest of your savings.

Natalie Berzatto, a miracle worker in your eyes had somehow pulled strings to get you an interview with the Tribune. So yeah, you owed Nat a lot more than placating smiles and cheap pizza.

“Are you sure you’re ready for tomorrow?” You shifted positions at Nat’s question, the two of you now sitting criss-cross applesauce, facing each other on the couch. You gave a small nod, fingers playing with your fuzzy socks.

“I don’t have much of a choice,” you let out a small laugh. “I can’t expect you and Pete to babysit me forever.” You smiled up at Natalie, the prospect of writing again caused a sense of excitement to stir within you. It felt like the only thing you had left, the only thing you were still good at. Although you had almost completely fucked up your life, you still had your writing, and that was a start.

“Maybe we can meet up for lunch after?” You didn’t want to celebrate too soon, you hadn’t even got a job yet, but the idea of a lunch date with Nat sounded like the best form of indulgence you had allowed yourself in a while.

The night continued with the two of you talking, Sugar doing her best to catch you up on all that you missed sans any mention of a certain blue-eyed baby brother she had. As the night began winding down the two of you cleaned up the mess of your dinner, before you sent Nat on her way with promises to fill her in after your interview tomorrow.

Making sure your kitchen was cleaned to your liking, you made your way into your room to begin settling in for the night. A knit crew neck you had meant to return to its rightful owner once upon a time, becoming the basis of your pajamas after a relaxing shower.

Settling into bed you couldn’t help but lie awake, mind racing with all the different scenarios that could play out tomorrow. This was your first night alone in your new home and the reality of just how alone you were slowly began to sink in. You knew Nat would always be there for you if need be, but she had her own life to live, the beginnings of a family in her near future.

All you had at that moment were your racing thoughts and the regrets of a life you had almost ended too soon.

You sat in the lobby of the Tribune leg bouncing nervously as you waited for your meeting with the editor-in-chief, resume, and copies of your work sitting snugly in your tote bag. You knew Natalie had already sent over your information, but your nerves forced you to believe that being over-prepared would be necessary.

The sound of the receptionist calling your name caught your attention. She was standing a little ways away from you waiting for you to follow her, you gave a nervous smile before rising from your seat and following the rhythmic click-clack of her heels down the hall. As you watched her walk in front of you, you thought you may have been a little underdressed in your casual street clothes, but you forced yourself to push your thoughts aside. They’d be judging you for your backlog of work, not your choice of attire.

The receptionist lead you to a corner office, the frosted glass of the exterior providing a sense of privacy. Ushering you into the empty room she let you know that the editor you’d be meeting with would join you shortly. You sent her a small thanks before walking into the room, eyes catching on the minimalistic decorations scattered around the office.

Your feet lead you to the wall of windows situated behind the desk, the view reminding you of an office you had occupied so many months ago. You looked out over the Chicago skyline, it still felt so surreal to be back in this city.

The face staring back at you something you were still learning how to get used to. The scars that decorated the right side of your face were healing up nicely considering how deep some of the glass had gone.

You jumped at the sound of the door closing, someone entered so swiftly you hadn’t even heard them, or maybe you were just too wrapped up in memories of a past life. You hurriedly turned from the window not wanting to seem rude, the man who had entered the room caught your eye before gesturing for you to take a seat at one of the two chairs in front of his desk.

You felt a little less concerned about your fashion choice as your eyes followed his Levi-clad legs as he settled into the chair behind his desk. You could feel your nerves returning, not knowing what to expect from this interview. In the most humble sense you had forgotten what being interviewed felt like, not having to go through the process since getting your first big journalist job straight out of college.

“Nervous?” Your leg stopped bouncing as the man’s voice met your ears, a shy smile curving your lips.

“Here I thought I was being subtle,” you tried to joke hoping to relax yourself a bit. The responding chuckle helped somewhat, so far the man sitting in front of you didn’t seem like too much of a stickler.

“Never thought I’d see the day you were nervous in front of me Baby,” you tried to control the look of disgust you felt begging to paint your features. You were grateful for Nat’s help but you were sure this was a mistake.

“I’m sure HR has their hands full with you.” You mumbled, the roll of your eyes showcasing your irritation. “Thank you for the opportunity sir, but I don’t think this is a good fit for me.” You reached out to the chair next to you where you had sat your tote bag wanting to get out of there as quickly as possible.

“No wait,” the sound of the rolling chair moving rapidly caused you to stop, seconds away from rising from your chair. You turned your attention to the figure in front of you eyebrows pinched together.

“It's me, Hayden,” your brows furrowed even more, your mind searching your memory for that name. “I…uh, I took you to senior prom. We met in our creative writing class that same year.”

You felt your eyes widen as your mouth formed the shape of an ‘o’, eyes darting to the pristine nameplate facing you on the desk. The name ‘Hayden Ivanovski’ staring directly back at you.

“No fucking way.” The whisper traveled easily through the silent office, Hayden’s echoing chuckle caused you to let out a small one of your own. “I’m sorry, it's just nobody but close friends and family even call me that anymore. And, I really wasn’t expecting to see you.”

You watched as he nodded, you could see it now. The boy you once knew in the maturity of his face, hadn’t changed much but it was enough that you wouldn’t easily recognize him if he passed you on the street.

“Uh, the porn stache sure is a uh choice,” your hand raised to gesture to your upper lip, you couldn’t help the smile curving your lips.

Hayden laughed head dropping as he resumed his seated position. “Divorce makes you do crazy things,” your smile faltered, you hadn’t meant the quip as an invitation to discuss any personal grievances. “No need to look so sad, it was mutual.” He shrugged the topic off like he hadn’t given it a second thought in a long while.

You nodded your head distractedly, “Enough about my failed marriage, how have you been?” You gave him a small smile, mind going blank as you thought of the best route to take this conversation.

“I uh, almost died five months ago,” the laugh ripped from Hayden’s chest, the last thing you were expecting to hear. You watched as he found your eyes, his smile disappearing as he took in the harrowing look on your face.

“You-you’re not serious are you?” The question almost caused you to laugh.

“As serious as my overdose was,” you watched as Hayden shifted in his seat, the air easily became uncomfortable. “Sorry coping mechanism.” You laughed the topic off, you had assumed Nat told him when she booked you this interview.

“So um, when does the interview start,” your leg began bouncing up and down again, the nervousness returning. If you hadn’t already made a bad impression you were sure exposing your less-than-stellar life choices definitely lost you the job.

“Nat didn’t tell you?” You stopped your brows from pinching together, the constant frowning sometimes the tiny scar between your eyebrows. “I don’t need to interview you, you’re an amazing journalist. I hired you the second Nat told me you were moving back. That is if you want to work here.”

“You’re not just hiring me because we went to prom together, or as a favor to Natalie are you?” Nat had helped you to get your foot in the door, you had wanted to secure the job because of your merit.

You watched as Hayden quickly shook his head, “While it is nice to reconnect with you, we need some experience in our newsroom. I know before your uh… incident you were working as a travel journalist, and the pay here wouldn’t be the same. But you’d still have full control over the stories you write, although you might not write as often as you’re used to.” You nodded along listening to his explanation. The fact that this was happening failed to resonate with you.

“So, the position of Managing Editor is yours if you want it.” Hayden sent you a small smile awaiting your response, he did his best not to focus too long on your scars as he stared in your direction.

“As long as I can write and edit then I will happily work for you,” the large grin spreading across your lips stretched the small scar stitched into your upper lip.

The smile on Hayden’s lips matched yours as he walked around the desk to shake your hand. The two of you sat there going over the expectations that your new role required, Hayden explaining the environment he tried to uphold at the paper.

You finished the meeting off with a tour of the floor the Tribune occupied, the one you’d mostly be working on. The two of you caught up a little as he input you into the system and created your badge so you could easily come and go as you pleased. You learned that he married Marlene Buchanan, a girl you went to high school with. The ink of their divorce still drying after only being finalized two months ago.

He invited you out to lunch but you had to rain check explaining the plans you made with Natalie promising the two of you would work something out in the future. He walked out with you, the two of you parting ways once you left the lobby.

You stood on the sidewalk taking in the crisp Chicago air. Your life was finally starting to feel like your own again, and even though you had only secured a job, the inevitable weight of doom that followed you was beginning to feel a little lighter.

Natalie was pacing in the office quickly moving to close the door as the chaos sounding through the building caused a headache to form. She knew Cicero would be there in the next hour, and that the money problem was their biggest issue in getting the new restaurant up and running.

The urge to call you was immediate after speaking with Cicero. Nat knew how much you cared about this place, and regardless of what anyone else thought she wanted you to have a say in any decision they made now that you were permanently back in Chicago. And she’d be lying if she said the reserved funds that came with you weren’t also a reason to invite you to this meeting.

Shouts could be heard through the door as she finally made her mind up, you two had plans for lunch anyways so you could just meet her and the two of you would leave together. Any excuse Nat could think up to call you would help her.

Sighing she scrolled through her contacts before forcing herself to press on your name and just call you. She listened as the phone rang, part of her hoping you didn’t answer her call, the hope immediately dying as your voice sang through the speaker.

“Nat, hey! I was just about to call you,” She smiled at the light tone in your voice, a tone she hadn’t heard in quite some time. “We still on for lunch?” The question caused her to take a deep breath, it was now or never she either asked you or she didn’t.

“Yeah of course. Uhh but would you mind meeting me at The Beef?” She was hoping the question came across as nonchalant, she called out your name as the line went quiet, sure you had hung up on her.

“Nat, I’m not sure I’m ready for that,” the apprehension in your voice made her feel guilty for even asking you in the first place.

“Listen, Baby, I know how you feel but we’re making a big decision today and I feel like you deserve to have your input heard,” she waited for a minute before continuing. “If it triggers you we can leave immediately, no questions asked okay? I just…this might be good for you.” She bit her lip as she waited for your response, she would be okay with whatever you decided but at least she had put the opportunity out there.

“I think I can be there in 45 minutes,” the tired sigh that escaped your lips matched the way Nat was feeling.

“Thank you, Baby.” She listened as you said your goodbyes before hanging up the phone, Nat was sure if she didn’t already have morning sickness she would’ve thrown up from that phone call alone.

It was exactly as you remembered it. Not that you had expected the exterior to change in the year since you’d been there. Although not physically changed things felt different, it no longer felt nostalgic as you stood there looking at the newspaper-covered windows. You could feel the anxiety eating away at you, the sick part deep inside of you wishing you had something to numb your feelings.

You could hear the faint sound of an alarm blaring with how close you were standing, the sound helping you to focus on the things you could control. You hadn’t come all this way just to look at the old building’s facade, and part of you didn’t think you could take disappointing Natalie by walking away. Nat wouldn’t have been disappointed in you though, but since your accident, you were scared to ever see that look in her eyes again.

The deep breath of fresh air filling your lungs helped to cool you down a bit. The pairing of your puffer jacket and scarf felt a bit suffocating.

In through your nose out through your mouth, a few more deep breaths were all you allowed yourself before forcing your hand to grip the door handle and step foot into a building that might haunt you for a lifetime.

The constant screeching of the alarm was so loud it made you glad that it drowned out the sound of the bell ringing above the door. Your eyes traveled around the restaurant, it was the same but it wasn’t. Little things missing telling you that some type of work was being done.

“As I live and fucking breathe!” The loud voice you would recognize anywhere drawing your attention to the dining area, Richie’s large figure taking up the doorway.

You shared a small smile with him. Subtly adjusting your scarf to cover the most noticeable scar lining your face, you watched as the older man took steps to close the distance between the two of you. The tall man quickly pulled you into a tight hug.

You hadn’t realized how much you needed a hug from Richie until you were snuggly pressed against his chest, the warmth of his body helping to relax you. The unconscious thought crossed your mind that you might have never experienced one of these hugs again if you hadn’t made it to the hospital in time.

The love Richie was pouring into the hug caused your eyes to water, Mikey’s passing bonding the two of you, the loss of someone you both loved so much bringing the two of you impossibly closer. But not close enough for him to know the path you had taken after. And not close enough for you to want to burden him with being just another addict in his life.

He pressed a gentle kiss to your head before pulling away, the annoying alarm still blaring at full volume. You stepped back to give him space, “You been fucking around in the crawl space Richie?” The question paired with your signature grin as Richie let loose his boisterous laugh.

“Of course, you’d fucking know about the alarm.” Richie’s disgruntled mumbling met your ears.

“Hey, Richie, could you please turn that goddamn motherfuckin thing off?” The voice of Cicero filtered through your ears. “It’s making me insane!”

“My bad Uncle J, Baby just walked through the door and shit like a ghost. Fucking Mikey booby trapping crawl spaces and shit.” He poked his head back into the dining room to let the occupants know he somewhat had the situation under control.

“Mikey’s fuckin Kevin McCalliper-,” The responses correcting Richie caused you to let out a small giggle, the noise bringing a smile to Richie’s lips.

You continued standing with Richie as he spoke to somebody on the phone, the long one-word password he gave made you chuckle. Pretending you knew how to help Richie was an excuse to not join the conversation going on in the back for a while.

While the blaring alarm was causing your ears to ring, the loud noise was a buffer between your impending thought and the inevitability of being back in this restaurant. The sudden quiet was the only sign that you would have to face a now unavoidable situation.

“Here lemme take that,” Richie reached out expecting you to give him your scarf and jacket. You hesitated, your wardrobe feeling like a sense of armor for the time being.

“Uh, I’m actually pretty cold. Thanks, Rich.” Your hand shot out to pat his bicep, head jerking in the direction the voices were coming from. “Sugar in there?” You didn’t need Richie to reply to know the answer.

You followed Richie’s lead as he headed to the back, taking a deep breath to still your nerves, not all too sure what you were getting yourself into. You watched as Richie pulled up a chair next to Cicero for you, taking your tote bag out of your hands as he gestured for you to sit. You smiled politely, giving him a small nod as you moved further into the room.

Three out of four familiar faces stared back at you, the look on Nat’s face indicating how much it meant for her that you showed up.

“What is this an intervention?” You made the joke as a way to cut the tension that had filled the room, the silence felt even louder as Nat said your name in a reprimanding tone, the joke not being funny to her one bit. You shrugged before moving to sit in your designated chair, shooting a small smile to the dark-skinned woman who was eyeing you from across the table. Your eyes easily avoided the blue ones you knew too well.

You listened as Nat cleared her throat, all attention focused on her. “So uh, I invited Baby here because I think she deserves to be a part of this decision.” Four eyes flashed to you as you awkwardly adjusted in your seat. “And, um she has a decent savings account.”

A snort left your lips at Natalie’s rushed words, her ulterior motives for inviting you here reminding you a bit of her mischievous brown-eyed older brother.

“Sorry uh, big fan of your work. But uh, how do you play into all this.” Your eyes drifted to the unknown woman, a smile played at your lips, a feeling of shyness sweeping across you at the fact that she had any idea who you were.

“Family friend.”

“Old acquaintance.”

The three other people at the table looked between you and Carmy, eyes darting back and forth at both of your explanations. You couldn’t help the cackle you let out, missing the look of panic shooting through Natalie’s eyes. You couldn’t recall a time you would ever describe your relationship with Carmen Berzatto as an acquaintanceship.

“Baby is a close family friend,” Nat interjected before any other response could be given. “A friend we should be thankful for even considering investing in the restaurant.”

Your eyes finally found Carmy’s having a hard time taming the smile threatening to spread across your lips. The false confidence you were exuding helped you not overthink the situation you were in.

The conversation picked back up where it had left off after you entered. You sank into your seat shoving your hands into your jacket and tucking your chin into your scarf as you did your best to pay attention. You couldn’t help but let your eyes travel across the mostly empty dining room, memories of a life that no longer felt like your own clawing to overtake your senses.

Up and down, up and down. The tick you gained while in recovery helped you to remain in the present your leg working overtime as it bounced to keep you focused.

The voices talking around you are drowned out by your wandering thoughts. Thoughts that had you re-evaluating your relationship with Natalie.

It was no secret that you had become a selfish person after Mikey’s death, every decision you made was to benefit you, and if someone else somehow benefited from it then good for them.

That was the reason you stayed in Chicago so long after the funeral, telling yourself that the remaining Berzattos needed you, that you were staying to make sure they made it out of the deep end alive.

But that was a lie, you stayed because you were too afraid to face your own emotions, afraid to face your grief head-on. Even now you could say you stayed behind to ensure Donna and Sugar were okay, but deep down you knew that you stayed because you didn’t want to be alone.

You helped Richie at The Beef because he needed you, needed to know he wasn’t alone. In all actuality, it was you who needed them, you who had become dependent on people grieving just as much as you.

The same could be said about your substance abuse after returning to your reality. The idea of never being able to talk to Mikey, see Mikey, or hold Mikey was all just an excuse you used to justify your indulgences.

You constantly told yourself that it wouldn’t be fair to burden Sugar or Richie with your hurting, that they didn’t need to babysit you while trying to heal themselves. That when your memory became spotty and you missed more than one of Sugar’s calls, it was because she didn’t need to put up with you and your problems.

And then unintentionally or not, you became Natalie’s problem. Not even letting her brother’s grave grow cold before you forced her to face the idea of losing another person she spent her whole life loving.

You pleaded with the universe for Nat to wipe her hands of you. To let you waste your life away and rot like you were starting to. To turn her back on you, because how could you so easily fall into the same vice as Mikey knowing how much it affected him; knowing how much it affected the people who cared for him.

How dare you pretend as though no one would give a shit if they had to bury you mere months after putting Michael to rest. How fucking dare you be so selfish.

There were nights in bed where you’d lay awake questioning your intentions. Had you purposely thrown your life away because you knew Natalie would come to your rescue? Did you somehow manipulate Natalie’s good nature into digging you out of a hole you were so far gone in you couldn’t bring yourself back from?

You always got on Natalie about putting herself first, and how she needed to stop stretching herself so thin for everyone else. And then you went and almost fucking died, and you forced her to take on a role she had been playing her whole life.

You had willingly ruined your life and forced Natalie to face the consequences.

If there was one thing you learned in your recovery, it was that getting clean, staying clean, and becoming a healthier better version of yourself should never be done for someone else. You had to want it for yourself, but damn if seeing Natalie’s face didn’t push you to get your shit together you weren’t sure what did.

“500,” you weren’t sure where the confidence to speak up came from, not even entirely sure what the balance in your savings account even was. Your unfocused eyes now staring directly into Natalies. “That’s my offer.” You quickly glanced around at everyone else unsure as to what they were even talking about but needing to put your stake into the game.

“Like $500..or,” your attention turned to the other woman, her voice trailing off indicating that she indeed was asking a question.

A chuckle parted your lips as you shook your head. “No, I mean 500K.” You made sure to look at each person across from you individually, instilling how serious your offer was.

“Bullshit.” The sound of Carmy’s voice startled you, sure he had been speaking this whole time but it's not like you were paying that much attention.

You scoffed, eyes rolling in tandem with the sound. “I thought you needed money Carmen,” the name slipped through clenched teeth. You turned to face Nat. Your final numbers would be decided between the two of you, “Nat?”

“100.”

“450.”

“120.”

“375.”

“200,” you hesitated for a minute. The triumphant smile on Natalie’s lips caused your eyes to narrow.

“250, or I walk.” You leaned forward hands moving to lay flat atop the table, a small smirk played on your lips. Your leverage was total shit and Nat knew that there was no way you’d walk away from this project.

“Deal.” The smile on your lips faltered as you faced Carmy again, his annoying crystal blue eyes staring daggers into you.

Clearing your throat you slumped back in your seat, hands moving back to hide inside your pockets. The meeting finished on a good note without a hitch, with the restaurant gaining an extra 250K to put toward inevitable expenses.

You quickly stood from your seat moving to escape any awkward reunion that may have sprouted between you and Carmy. The interest in meeting Carmy’s partner was pushed to the back burner as you made your way through the restaurant, looking for the one other person you wanted to speak with at the moment.

Maneuvering through the kitchen you found Tina not too far from what you remembered to be her usual station. You leaned against the wall watching her work, the effort she was putting into saving burnt and rusted pots bringing a small smile to your face. You shrugged off your jacket and slipped the scarf from around your neck.

“Need some help?” The hesitation in your voice was evident. You weren’t sure where you stood with Tina, you knew how she felt about Mikey and how much his choices affected her. The thought of relaying the past few months to her was too much for you to think about at this moment, you had time, and when you were ready you would confide in her. But for now, there was no point in ruining a much-needed reunion.

You watched as Tina jolted, not prepared to hear your voice. “Ay, dios mío!” Tina turned to you hand raised above her heart, eyes wide. “Why the fuck are you sneaking around the kitchen.” You listened to the older woman’s voice scold you before making your way in her direction.

Not giving her another second before throwing your arms around her, you probably should’ve made sure it was okay, but there was nothing like a mother’s endearing hug to let you know that everything would eventually be okay.

The two of you stood in each other’s embrace in the middle of the kitchen. Neither of you said a word as your quiet sobs began to echo off the walls. You were crying for Mikey, and for yourself, and for all the lives the both of you had ruined, whether they knew it or not.

You were apprehensive to step foot back in this establishment so soon. But it had easily shown you all the things your life would have missed out on had you not allowed Natalie to get you the help you needed.

Carmy’s head perked up as he noticed you exit the kitchen with Tina. His irritation began to rise as he laid eyes on you, Sugar had blindsided him with your arrival. He hadn’t even known you moved back to Chicago, let alone that you had any interest in getting The Bear up and running.

You looked different. His eyes immediately caught the obvious scar tracing along your jaw. The tip of it started a few centimeters below your chin before meeting your jawline and finding its end just before your ear. It was a gnarly scar and he knew for sure the amount of stitches you needed must have been painful.

Carmy was also sure you didn’t have that scar a year ago, nor the smaller one that was carved into your upper lip. He would’ve taken notice, you can’t spend 48 hours with someone and not be able to recall all the puzzle pieces that were specially made to create them.

He watched the two of you approach the group at the counter, you hanging a little farther back than probably necessary, pretending to occupy yourself with the bare walls. Carmy might’ve smiled at your awkwardness if he wasn’t so confused by your presence.

A distracted farewell to Tina left his lips as he tried not to be so obvious in his study of you. His eyes refused to meet Sugar’s as he could feel her watching him, watching you.

Sydney’s return gained his full attention, forcing himself to focus on something else other than his thoughts that were racing and full of you. The clearing of your throat as you finally made your way to stand next to Sug had all six sets of eyes focusing on you.

You didn’t just look different. From the very few interactions the two of you shared and Carmy’s constant people-watching, you seemed like an altogether new person, the confidence and surety he was used to seeing in you was dull.

“I don’t mean to impose, but I was kind of hoping I could take on a more involved role in all of this?” Carmy’s eyes squinted as your hand raised in a flourish to signify you were talking about the restaurant.

You were met with silence. Carmy was too distracted by being in your presence after a drought without you, and Sydney still hadn’t even been truly introduced to you.

“Shit, sorry.” Your hand shot out to shake the woman’s hand as the two of you introduced yourselves. Although she read your articles, mostly your profile stories highlighting various chefs, it was different to be formally introduced to the person behind the stories.

“I uh, actually read most of your articles.” Carmy watched as you brightened up a bit your writing something that would always bring you joy. “I had to cancel my subscription though.” The sound of your laugh went straight to Carmy’s heart, he hadn’t realized how much he missed the delicate sound until hearing it again in this moment.

“I actually have a proposal for you three,” you paused, making sure everyone was paying attention before continuing your explanation. “What if I highlighted the renovation? I was..uh…before,” you had to stop yourself and take a deep breath to ground yourself.

“I was profiling The Beef and Mikey before he…yeah. Um, so I was thinking I could maybe continue that with The Bear,” you stopped to make sure everyone was following along, sending Carmy a small smile before continuing. “We could profile the team, give people a behind-the-scenes look into the renovation, and who’s behind it. I would publish it, it would be great PR and might help to fill seats.”

The following silence made you feel insecure about your proposal. “Maybe just give it a thought. No pressure or anything uh just let me know if there's any interest.” Your voice trailed off as your confidence continued to plummet, Carmy’s blank eyes doing nothing to quell your nervousness.

You turned your attention back to Sugar, a silent plea to leave in your eyes. She nodded “Uh, Baby and I had plans so we’ll be heading out.” You sent the two chefs in front of you a forced smile before hurriedly returning to the kitchen to pick up your jacket and scarf you left there. Call it cowardly but slipping out through the kitchen’s back door seemed to be in your best interest.

The fresh air whipped against your face like a blade, and the immediate change in temperature helped to relax you. There would never have been a perfect time to make your return to this restaurant, and maybe it wasn’t how you things to go, but you felt an immense pressure off your shoulders.

The hard part was over, you made it through the door, walked past the remnants of Mikey every time a specific spot reminded you of him.

It wouldn’t always be like today, you knew that. Some days would be harder than others as you worked through your struggles and allowed yourself to feel the loss of Mikey. One step at a time, it was cliche but it was really how you had to live your life from now on.

Being around Carmy would continue to be hard for the time being. You had essentially watched his brother deteriorate, watched as his mind no longer became his own. And you too had almost become a victim to the whims of your drug-addled mind.

You wouldn’t force a relationship with him and would make him privy to your shortcomings when you were ready. But you told yourself you would be okay if he wanted nothing to do with you, the choices you made would not be easy to come to terms with. And if Carmen Berzatto decided he was finally done with your constant disappointment in his life, you’d just have to accept it.

The sound of Natalie’s footsteps pulled you from the labyrinth of your mind, a small smile sent her way as the two of you made your journey far from this lot of memories.

Carmen stared at the outlines they had hung along the walls, eyes following along with tasks that needed to be completed to open in six months.

He didn’t want to admit it but he was a little bummed out that Sugar returned to the restaurant without you. Any small glimpse, or interaction he could get with you he would swallow like a man starving. The chef stood there doing his best as his counterpart gushed over meeting you, doing his best not to cringe at his two worlds colliding.

Carmy wasn’t sure if he could keep it professional while you worked alongside him on the renovation. Sure you would be doing your own thing in tandem with the work that would get done. But surrounding himself with you in an already stressful time in his life and an even more stressful environment wasn’t something he was prepared for.

He let his mind wander, thoughts of what happened to you in the year since your visit drowning him. Carmy had no clue what happened after you left that night, no clue what had seemed to connect you and Sugar more than you already were.

Seeing you again made his chest hurt. Seeing you was like a hot poker being shoved through his heart, unbearably comfortable but all so warming at the same time. He wanted to know you, know what had changed you since the last time his fingers had traced your skin.

Carmy knew the two of you were nowhere near as close as you had once been. Unsure if you’d ever share a connection like your past one. But he knew while you were here, in Chicago, surrounding yourself with him, the two of you would be given equal opportunity to put this years-long game of cat and mouse to an end; it was just a matter of who bit first.

a/n: well…here we are. i know this might read like baby’s life is just gonna be sunshine and rainbows from here on out but i can promise its not. she is a deeply flawed character with a lot of shit to figure out and a half baked relationship with everyone’s favorite chef won’t fix that. i’ve been around addicts my whole life so i have an understanding of what they can be like, i want to iterate that in no way am i romanticizing addiction. my personal experiences with functioning/addicts DO NOT make me an expert on this topic in anyway, but i do use those experiences to write for baby. i’m always here if anyone needs to talk. i hope you all enjoy <3

taglist: @hawkins-2000 @elliesbabygirl @allbark-no-bite @anakinswh0re3005 @rexorangecouny @thecraziestcrayon @fruitcupsworld @nishinoyahhh @lilylovelyxo @ridingthehotmessexpress @noas-ark @jadeittic @hellokittyever @luvr-bunnyy @sxgees @fandomhopped @is-this-a-febreze-commercial @kravitzwhore @chanluuvr @readingwiththereids @chims-kookies @ladygrey03 @ferida-kahlo @wanderlustnightwanderer @how2besalty @armydrcamers @jointherebellion215 @jackierose902109 @blkbxrbie-esther @ajordan2020 @head-slut-in-charge @magnet-girl @thebookwormlife @sevikasblackgf @writers-hes @senassn @bunnysthngs @khena @kailyn-g05 @ovaqma @fire-treasure-iii @frequentnosebleeder

unable to tag: @gcidrvsh @awatt31 @cauliflowerpatch

[wonillaa]

「 experiencing the season while dating jake 」

niki version . jungwon version . sunghoon version

note; happy jake day!!! i love him so much i wish there was a way to show him directly :( the sweetest and most loving guy ever, i hope you all are enjoying your day too <3 happy to bring this series back LOL

spring

— with the windows down he would drive you both through backroads, your favorite shared playlist playing loudly in the back. you’re both singing and can’t hold back your smiles. “yn!! i really really love you!!!” he’d yell as loud as he could, you almost couldn’t hear over the music but you’d still make quick eye contact and feel how sincere he is.

summer

— beach dates allll the time. day or night it’s his favorite place to spend time with you. he’d always tell you how pretty you look under the sun, the light hitting your skin and eyes in such a stunning way. he’d fall even more in love when you’re in the moonlight. “i’m so lucky. i have the most jaw dropping toe curling beautiful partner in the world” he’d confess many times while nonstop kissing everywhere he can reach.

fall

— all the cliche s/o fall activities he will not let you skip any of them. you’ll make leaf piles and jump in them, go on hikes to see all the leaves change pretty colors, and have apple cider and donuts. he thinks it’s so cute when you wear flannels together or you wear his own. “ahhhh look at you my cutie”

winter

— you’re going sledding, having snowball fights, and warming each other up. he’ll giggle while throwing himself into you struggling to find warmth. he’d suggest ice fishing since it’s something he’s always wanted to try. when you finally give in and go with him he’s joking the whole time about how you’re like a penguin. “i’m scared of falling in jake this is actually terrifying” “stopp we won’t. but let go of me please if you fall in i’m not going down with you”

extras

— i’m not sure if he even celebrates easter but if that’s in the cards for you two during spring he’s def leaving eggs around the dorms for you to find lolol

— ive said before but i think physical affection is his favorite thing, he will tackle you out of love and if you’re at the beach you are not catching a break from his playing

— this isn’t meant to be smut but like 😭 he’d probably make no nut november jokes lmao he’s serious about it too?? it’s a challenge with the 02z 🫡

— christmas with him . he’d give you the most heartfelt gifts ever :( a heart locket necklace maybe, just something very special

[books-and-catears]

OK - I love writing different requests! A teen mc (11-13) comes to Devildom and everyone is surprised but there is no going back now that Lucifer randomly picked us. Anyway, we're very shy and obedient, but because we're afraid of demons, we're always hanging out with the trio of solomon, luke and simeon. Slowly Luke and teen mc fall in love with each other LMAO. What would be the reaction of the brothers and other dateables?

OH MY GOD! EVERYONE HOLD YOUR HORSES! WE'RE ABOUT TO ENTER FLUFF SUPREME ZONE! 🍧🍨🍰🍮

Luke and Child!MC is just AWWWW just imagine these two cuties running around, holding hands AHHHH 🍭🍬🍪🍩🍯

Lucifer

Honestly he likes you. You don't cause much trouble and are quiet around the house.

Protects you like a father. Doesn't let Asmo and Mammon take you anywhere unsupervised.

He knows you are still afraid of demons so he tries to make himself as amicable as possible. Tries to give you little trinkets or magical charms that will keep you safe from the more dangerous demons.

When you and Luke start spending time together and he sees sparks fly, he is wary at first. A human and an angel love didn't fare good during their time.

But looking at innocent and happy you looked in the kitchen play fighting while making desserts - he couldn't resist but smile.

Mammon

Huh? What's this? Another little sibling? And really little at that-

Great Big Brother Mammon is HYPER PROTECTIVE and there's nothing you can do about it.

However because you are small and meek, he will try to get you into his stealing and selling shenanigans every once in a while. Of course he won't say you were involved if he gets caught.

When he sees Luke come over almost everyday to give you some sort of new tart he's made - he instantly knows.

He will help you pick out what gifts you should give Luke in return. Has a bet going on with Levi and Satan as to how long it will take you two babies realize you've fallen in love.

Leviathan

WOAHHHHH he has a sidekick now! A little human sidekick just like those adventure games!

You are so quiet and curious, you're the ideal partner to have while gaming. He loves to rant and tell you the lore behind all the games he plays.

He double checks to make sure the animes you both watch together are child friendly. He doesn't want to corrupt your innocence!

Oh. My. Diavolo. Luke and you are a cliche romance anime waiting to happen. And sometimes he goes overboard with the shipping.

Loves to make you both watch cutesy romantic childhood friend trope animes and watch Luke lose his head trying to hide his blushes, while you smile and hold his hand. MOE OVERLOAD.

Satan

Bringing a small human like this to Devildom of all places...Is Diavolo really that dumb?

HYPER PROTECTIVE brother 2.0 who teaches you a hundred different hexes and protective spells to keep you safe if he isn't around.

A young mind is a curious one. So even though you are quiet, he observes what things catch your attention and starts explaining their history right away.

And you're an eager learner which makes you his favourite student as well. Ugh his brothers should learn from you.

Watching you and Luke bond over your favourite books and exchange stories about the human and celestial realm in the library - he knew it was a love story waiting to bloom.

Doesn't show it openly but he's rooting for you both. Who else could be better for you than a angel of your age?

Asmodeus

What a cute little human! Oh just adorable! No need to be afraid of me MC, I'll take good care of you

Honestly he was the only demon who didn't scare you right away cause of his beautiful face. When he hears that he is overjoyed.

Will not hesitate to make you his fashion guinea pig. Buys you hundreds of cute outfits to match with him. You're Devildom's popular little darling human now.

He's the first to detect the connection between the Luke and you and he doesn't shut up about it. Oh, imagine you both in a little bride and groom outfit - Luke almost screamed his head off at that.

He knows Luke keeps trying to take you to Purgatory Hall under the guise of keeping you protected from these horrid demons and calls him out on it.

Beelzebub

Another baby sibling? Yes yes you might be 11 you're still a baby to him.

Gentle protective teddy bear he is. Frequently carries you on his shoulders, so the other demons tremble at the sight of him.

Loves taking you to new places and try different foods. He has a catalog full of things Satan has written down: ingredients that might be poisonous to you so he takes care of that too.

Luke and you together? For him that means DOUBLE THE DESSERTS. He will hang around close by the kitchen whenever Luke comes over to bake with you.

Seeing you and him together gives him good memories of Lilith and her human. He vows to make sure you both have a happier ending.

Belphegor

This is a rather small human. He can't exactly hate something as small as you.

Is standoffish at first, you're still a human after all. But he comes around soon enough when he sees his brothers bonding with you.

Little by little, you remind him eerily of Lilith. And when he finds out you're actually her descendent - he goes into hyper protective.

When he sees you and Luke together, he gets even more flashbacks to his past and how happy and free they used to be. Dreads the same ending for the both of you.

Vows to protect you and Luke along with Beel. They couldn't protect their sister, they will protect what's left of her.

Simeon

Oh what a lovely little human child! How sweet and obedient - you're an angel's dream child.

He suggests the human be permanently moved to Purgatory Hall given all the time they spend here.

He knows how the relationship between a human and an angel caused a realm wide war last time but he's here now. And he trusts Luke.

It's so endearing to watch the two of you running around holding hands completely oblivious of what's happening with you both.

Makes up excuses to keep you coming over - to study, to bake, to read his new love story manuscript which is absolutely not based on Luke and you.

Solomon

It's a human child? Leave it up to him. They are his responsibility now. (Nobody is leaving him alone with you don't worry)

Think of Sirius Black and Harry Potter: yes that dynamic. Chaotic father figure + Chaotic curious child.

Teaches and experiments lots of new spells with you. Encourages you to do pranks with Satan and Belphie

When it comes to Luke and you, he just smirks uncontrollably. And Luke notices and shoos him off.

When he tries to get you both to try his recipes, Luke already has wings out ready to to carry you to safety.

Diavolo and Barbatos

Oh dear, did they summon the right human? This is only a child?

They are both secretly doting on you so much. Frequent trips to the castle and endless gifts from the Prince himself.

Barbatos is delighted at Luke and you learning how to make desserts from him. He sees how you both exchange blushy glances and giggles. And he doesn't even need to use his powers to see the future of the both of you.

Diavolo looks over at both of you and feels proud of himself. Seeing this, he knows his program is working. An angel and human falling in love in his kingdom.

Both of them organize play dates for you and Luke and they are shipping you shamelessly.

[sillytaetime]

Can I request seventeen reacting to you guys camping/renting out a trailer for a weekend getaway? I’m going in a few weeks so I was curious to see how’d they react 🏕

Oooo ok this actually sounds really fun!! I hope this is how you wanted it!

♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡♡

Scoups:

I had a lot of trouble looking for a gif and I gave up bc none of them were what I wanted. I even tried making one😭

I get the feeling that he loves camping. Like, he probably begged you to go camping for a while and you kept saying no. So, one day he rented a camper, packed some bags and then carried you to the trailer and drove off to a campsite and you were stuck. But he decorated the camper to look like a date night and you guys had a really cute date and it reminded you why he was your boyfriend in the first place.

Jeonghan:

Excuse me, can you not kill me rn😀

Tbh, I see your relationship being very spontaneous and full of jokes. so like, maybe you jokingly said, “let’s go camping” and Jeonghan rented a trailer that second and then when you guys are out there, all you do is complain and he was like “I thought you wanted this” and then you snap back saying “I was joking” and then he feels really crappy. but in the end, you guys have fun and it’s a memory the two of you laugh about.

Joshua:

Omg, cutie🥺 Like I swear everytime he smiles a year gets added to my life.

Shua grew up in America and camping is a really big thing in America, so I think he likes camping. it’s a great chance to be outside and explore the wilderness. he lives for camping. but you on the other hand, you’ve been inside the camper since a bug landed on you for 0.001 seconds

Jun:

I think he would only want to go camping so that he could be your protector. He wants to show off his muscles and be your “manly man”. Jun wants you to be happy so even if he doesn’t necessarily like camping, if you ask to go camping, he’ll be getting stuff together and buying a tent for the two of you in an instant. no second thoughts, if you wanna do it, he’s down to.

Hoshi:

I couldn't find a gif I liked for hoshi🥲

I get the vibe that it was his idea to go camping. Like, your not opposed to it, but it wasn't your idea so now you sitting in the trailer (that he rented out for the weekend) thinking about life. It's currently raining outside and honestly you two are contemplating going home, but you ultimately decided to just stay unless the weather got bad. You guys played some board games and just laughed and giggled together. Definitely a memory you guys will never forget.

Wonwoo:

Help why's he so adorable🥺

For wonwoo, I really think he doesn't like camping. He seems (definitely does) like he loves books and like to sit on a couch or bed and just read. He's not boring or anything I just feel like he would rather cuddle with you and read a book on the days he has off work instead of renting a trailer and going camping🤷🏼‍♀️

Woozi:

Woozi would literally not complain. At all. He's happy he gets to spend time with you (bc he luvs u). He got the weekend off from work so you immediately rented out a camper and the two of you started backing bags and food to take and then, boom. You're out in the middle of nowhere in a trailer, spending time with your lovely bf whom you love very much. And when it's time for bed, he can't stop smiling (oml this boy luvs u sm)

Mingyu:

I cannot begin to say how adorable this man in istg🤚🙄

Gyu looks mean and tough on the outside but he's nothing but a sweetheart. He's gentle and it's obvious he loves you. He obviously agreed to camping bc he loves you and he can be manly for you. Buuuut... when he was setting up the tent to "be manly" he broke it so then you guys quickly went to rent a trailer cuz he can't break that, right? Wrong. He broke the sink😶 but it's ok cuz he looked adorable trying to fix it

The8:

Ahhhh his smile😭

Minghao is a chill kind of guy and he's definitely willing to fight a bear for you so I think when you convince him to go camping, he would be well prepared. Already warmed up on some acrobatics and he's got pepper spray/a taser. Man's is prepared to be your guardian angel👼

DK:

Dokyeom loves you. So if camping is something you really (and I mean REALLY) wanted to do, then he'd say yes without a second thought, but he'd make sure you absolutely wanted to do it. So once he confirmed, you got the camping tent in your car, some snacks/food, blankets, pillows, and anything else you might need and went off to find a nice place to set up camp. Mostly just consists of you and kyeom cuddling by the campfire (but your not one to complain)

Seungkwan:

"Can't we just stay home??" "No, seungkwan. It's our anniversary we need to go out and do something as a couple." "But why camping" Yeah, seungkwan would just complain all the way until you guys arrive at the spot, then he wants to go hiking and make s camping and roast marshmellows and then makeout until the sun comes up. He's the most confusing ass boyfriend you could ever ask for, but you love him so.. you won't complain too much.

Vernon:

Happy boi🥲 he literally doesn't care what the two of you do as long as he's with you. I get the feeling that he's very clingy so like, always wants to do things together and camping is no exception. He loves it bc he loves you and you guys remember this forever and laugh/smile about it all the time.

Dino:

"Nope." "Please Dino!! It would be so much fun!" "For you. There's so many bugs and dangerous animals!" He over thinks it too much. So even if you guys go out there, it wouldn't be fun bc all he does it whine and complain about the things that could happen so you trip gets cut short.

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My requests are always open and I appreciate requests because they actually give me ideas so feel free to request anytime!!

I'll be posting my second one-shot soon, so stay tuned for the Teaser<3

Make sure to go give some love and support to my first one-shot !

[tired-biscuit]

Heyyy chica!

Since your fave is Mr. Kiba... who do you think he would/should've ended up w/ in the series?

Ive seen abit about him and Hinata (I definitely ship that more than NaruHina but I'll save that for another day 😅💀).

If Hina how do you think they'd be as a couple?? 🤔

ok so this is just my opinion, but i'm a huge kibahina shipper, as well as one for narusaku!!

i mean c'mon, kiba and hinata would look so fucking cute together. tamaki was okay for him, i suppose, and naruhina never truly made much sense to me, but the rugged, rough-around-the-edges brute, in love and dating the soft-spoken, timid cutie? sign me up for that.

kiba was always caring towards hinata and super protective of her, but the thing that really stuck with me was that even though his protectiveness for her was potent, he at the same time respected her a lot and believed in her capabilities. like he was the first person to actually notice her and was her number one hype man; always cheering her on, pushing her to strive for the best version of herself she can be and to never settle for anything less or hold back when it came to fighting/using her powers.

he was such a meanie towards everyone but hinata. it's sooo obvious that he has a soft spot for her; always teasing her about her crush on naruto and holding onto her whenever she was close to fainting, oh my lord. they're just so precious, ahhhh!!

i remember him telling naruto [i think?] that she was "more than able to fend for herself", and i love that about kiba - he knew damn well that she was strong and fierce and made a point to make it clear for anybody who dared fuck with her.

i think their dynamic would be the "we're two completely different people, but it still works." like imagine them going to a party as a couple - the sly extrovert holding the shy, quiet girl by the waist, getting her a drink, teasing her, holding her close.

i feel like she'd blush at anything he'd do and he'd poke her cheek just to feel the warmth of her skin on the tip of his finger even though she'd flinch at the physical contact in public. he'd talk to friends, but try to ease her into the conversation gently [nothing too intense that'd overwhelm her, just like similar interests or random chatter], and he'd constantly ruffle her hair, and gossip into her ear, until she'd scold him that he's being rude.

he'd give her the biggest bear hugs, like sway her from side to side until she'd start to laugh. would nibble on her soft cheek just to see her smile when she's having a bad day. would compliment her cooking. braid her hair, because he'd learn to do it just for her. give her those wet, loving smooches all over her face that'd make her giggle. would always let her wear his jacket and sweaters because he knows she likes oversized clothing and it'd just make her smell like him anyway. would jokingly sink his teeth into her finger when she'd trace it over the tip of his nose when she'd think he was asleep.

she'd be really hesitant about trying any sort of thing in their relationship, but he'd make her feel comfortable and safe enough to the point where she'd actually want to initiate something first.

i think hinata would be able to finally relax around kiba, unlike with other people; like she'd show more of her personality and actually share her opinion on certain things she likes and the hobbies she enjoys indulging in. she'd open up like a bright sunflower because of him, and he'd be the sunshine that makes it grow.

despite being arrogant and rude at times, kiba's actually really sweet towards people he cares about and would be super open with her when it came to how he's feeling. i think it's the thing that would draw her to him in the first place; his ability to portray such raw, intense emotions without ever feeling ashamed or scared of people seeing them.

kiba would be like an anchor for her, he'd keep her grounded and safe, but would still help her grow into this confident person that has always been hiding underneath layers upon layers of shyness.

he'd teach her how to enjoy life and live in the moment and just let loose from time to time and fucking breathe in the summer air before jumping into the icy sea completely butt-naked, because she'd know that he'd be waiting for her on the shore with a dry towel and a warm kiss right after she'd come running back.

hinata on the other hand, would teach him how to be patient and rational, and how to be more gentle and kind towards others. she'd show him how to be satisfied with the little pleasures in life and that less is more at times, and that he doesn't need to keep proving himself to her because he is enough - goddamn, he is enough. and he always will be enough for her.

he's the man that could sense when something would be off with her just by one look to her face, and that would give her hand a gentle squeeze to assure her that everything is all right. and when she'd look up into his eyes and see that dazzling, silly grin of his - she'd just know that everything really was going to be okay. that he'd make it be okay.

both of their hearts are so, so big and golden. sigh, i love them so much.

[shippingcontacts]

Love in the air ep 7

I haven't made a post for the last 2 ep just imagine whatever useless input I would have added 🙃

But onto ep 7 the definition of dramatic. Can't lie, I watched a majority of it with one eye closed and the other squinted. How did I see the subtitles you ask? Don't worry about that sweetheart 🤠

I will say. The HAIR on this man, ugh they should have styled him with his hair down more.

I haven't even had time to see everyone elses reaction to the kidnap stuff...i have some feelings...that I won't voice😂(maybe some other time?) moving on to payurain being adorable as always. Especially rain.

let me put him in my pocket

Glad they worked in a nice pun there

But you know what I didn't actually think would happen? THIS

Yeahhhhh I remember when this was a fan theory...i never...i...did I misinterpret? This is a joke right?😅

TO THE PART IVE BEEN WAITING FOR BUT NEVER THOUGHT WOULD COME SO SOON

Prapaisky

What a cutie...He's gonna cause so much chaos I love it😈

I've spent so much time fawning over rainsky's friendship that I've over looked the delight that payupai's dynamic could be. I hope to see more

Prapai is going to be such a pain in the ass😌 a hot, rich pain in the ass

HE JUST SCREAMS 'SMUG BASTARD™' 💞

Ahhhh the sweet smell of nepotism 😌 rain and sky are officially fighting for their place as my favorite character👀 now if they could dial up the himbo on him a tad bit.

In conclusion. I'm so hyped payurain got their moments and even more hyped to be demolished and run over by prapaisky in all their greatness. I had nothing of intelligence to add but then again...who comes to me for coherent thoughts?

[ji-yaaan]

Anonymous asked:

Hello! I like your blog and the little comments here and there makes me laugh at times hehe ^^ May I request headcanons for Vil, Leona, Mal, and Floyd reactions and what they'll do to reconcile w/ the reader after a very hearted argument to which Reader may have said "I hate you" before storming out. Would they wait for a bit? A few days or hours? Or would they be upfront with their apology immediately? Reader also apologizes at the end, crying slightly if that's okay. If you notice me, thanks! 

°•°•𝐘𝐨𝐮 𝐇𝐚𝐭𝐞 𝐌𝐞?•°•°•

HC's with: Leona, Vil, Floyd, and Malleus.

Note: Ofc, I was late yet again. Pls forgive me dear sir... And ofc tumblr hates me so it won't cooperate! Drafts got deleted 3 times.... so if it somehow becomes inconsistent... I DEEPLY APOLOGIZE! STONE ME GENTLY! anyways, i hope you enjoy this, actually no, I beg that you enjoy this?! Idk lololololololololol.

[𝚈𝚘𝚞𝚛 𝚝𝚎𝚊 𝚑𝚊𝚜 𝚏𝚒𝚗𝚊𝚕𝚕𝚢 𝚋𝚛𝚎𝚠𝚎𝚍? 𝙸𝚍𝚔 𝚕𝚘𝚕]

°•°•°•𝙇𝙚𝙤𝙣𝙖 𝙆𝙞𝙣𝙜𝙨𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙡𝙖𝙧 •°•°•°

“I HATE YOU!” with bits of tears in your eyes, you slammed the door shut behind you leaving Leona dumbfounded all by himself.

You hate him?You hate him!?!? Is that like for real??? He’ll scratch the back of his head in shame of pushing things too far to the point you were in tears.

But what can he do? His pride caught the best of him and he acted rash in the heat of the moment. This prideful lion just doesn’t know when to shut up smh.ಥ‿ಥ

He’ll try to remember when did everything started to go wrong, but he'll just get more and more guilty the more he thinks about it.

“Tchhhh... I messed up big time...”

It's not his style to give up easily, but his mind was set in a frenzy the moment he thinks about you leaving him.

A day without you started to become dull and boring the moment he grew fond of you. So it somehow became a habit of his to constantly seek you unconsciously. Whether it's a whiff of your scent, your voice ringing in the hallways, even the sound of your footsteps is something he could easily recognize.

But now that the two of you fought, this lion will find any way possible to avoid you seeing him.

Yeah... it will probably take a while for him to apologize...(꒦ິ⌓꒦ີ)

But when the time does come, expect Leona to prepare a simple yet sincere apology.

“Oi herbivore... Sorry about the other day ok? I missed my pillow for a while now...I lose...”

Simple yet sincere :') The prideful arrogant lion somehow learned to apologize despite his ego way ahead of him. He can't stand the thought of loosing you ok? (｡•́︿•̀｡)

°•°•°•°•𝙑𝙞𝙡 𝙎𝙘𝙝𝙤𝙚𝙣𝙝𝙚𝙞𝙩•°•°•°•°•

“VIL STOP IT! I hate this! I hate everything! I hate you!” you quickly ran away to the door as vil stood in his spot stupefied.

You hate him? You hate the Vil Schoenheit himself?Then so be it...

Vil is basically pissed and angry™. Moreover, you had the guts and audacity to tell him you hate him. His pride was shattered in front of him. And he's not happy about that (꒦ິ⌓꒦ີ)

Nope. Nah. Never. He's not apologizing anytime sooner now. He'll be waiting for that spicy well deserved apology you have for him...

He'll try his best to avoid you and give you the sassy cold shoulder treatment™. It will probably last for a few days or maybe a week. He has his pride y’know?

Not until he hears a muffled sob in the hallways and realized it was your voice. You looked visibly upset and sad as you cried your heart out, all alone in the empty hallways.

Oh no... What did he do? Was his nagging that bad? Did he take it too far with the makeovers? Guilt ate his soul away as he tried to sort out his thoughts with the clear image of your crying face embedded in his mind.

“Okay... Maybe I did take it a little too far...”

Making up his mind, Vil will try to make everything set for tomorrow and apologize to you to fix this feud  you both have. ( ╹▽╹ )

When classes are over and the two of you finally get to be alone, Vil will try to straighten this misunderstanding now! ( ꈍᴗꈍ)

“Hey Y/n I just want to tell you... I'm sorry.” “Vil I'm so sorry for the other day!-”

The both of you stared at each other with shock... Did the both of you just say sorry at the same time?

“Pfffttttt-” The both of you laugh from how hilarious this moment was. It felt as if the fight you had didn't happened at all. (人 •͈ᴗ•͈)

“Y/n I'm sorry... I took it too far with what I do without asking your opinion first...”

“Yeah... I'm sorry I lashed out at you too... That was petty...”

Vil will definitely make a million dollar once in a lifetime seen smile, so you better treasure this rare sight!!!(｡•̀ᴗ-)✧

“No more fighting, okay? ”

•°•°•°•°•𝙁𝙡𝙤𝙮𝙙 𝙇𝙚𝙚𝙘𝙝•°•°•°•°•°

“Floyd I hate you!” you slammed your way out of the table, running away from Floyd.

Angering Floyd was not the brightest Idea in the book. His infamous “bad moods” was not something anyone would like to experience. But somehow, he was really pushy and annoying today and you were fed up with it.

“Ahhhh~ Koebi-chan hates me now? what do I do?”

Thankfully, Floyd wasn’t really angry, though he was sad and heart broken that his favorite person said they hated him.(╥╭╮╥)

Floyd is an impulsive boi, so he might secretly follow you to see your face or something lol.

Ofc, Knowing Floyd, he’d definitely skip classes and skip his job at the Mostro Lounge  due to his mood swings. Ofc, a certain octoboi wasn’t really happy with this.

Azul will probs tell Jade to help out his brother or something, lol Azul be secretly worrying for the two of you loooool.

However, with the help of Jade, the mushroom eel himself, he can guide his brother to make up with you!!!

Thank god mushroom eel is here to save the day! ( ´◡‿ゝ◡`)

A fight with Floyd won’t really last long. Because Floyd being Floyd, he’ll naturally come to you like nothing ever happened! That’s why you have to be patient and understanding when it comes to Floyd ok?

With the biggest hug from behind you. There was a cute eel boi that has come to ambush you with love!

“Shrimppy! Don’t avoid meeee! I miss you so much so hang out with me at the Mostro Lounge againnn!”

Floyd is not really good with his words nor his apologies. Though, his blunt and honest demeanor is definitely one of his charming points!!!! (☆▽☆)

“Shrimpy! I have some takoyaki with me! let’s share them together ok?!”

Ugh, Floyd is too cute... It would be a capital sin to not forgive him and decline his offer! Tsk I’m watching you, you better accept that apology!

•°•°•°•𝙈𝙖𝙡𝙡𝙚𝙪𝙨 𝘿𝙧𝙖𝙘𝙤𝙣𝙞𝙖•°•°•°

“MALLEUS I HATE YOU!”

Shock. Pure shock. You hate him? The last thing Malleus wants is to hurt your feelings. In his eyes, humans are delicate and vulnerable beings, so he tries his best to protect you and treat you with utter delicacy. Yet it seems as if he failed to do that...

Just before you slam the door behind you and escape this fight, a hand grabs your wrist in attempts to stop you. Nonetheless you still make your way out, leaving Malleus standing there alone.

Malleus was deeply hurt and sorry for making you sad and angry. His heart was shattered with the thought of you leaving him, someone who made their way this close to his heart, someone he cherishes deeply.

But this fight wont really last long because Malmal would definitely try and apologize as quickly as possible!(ᓀ˵▾˵ᓂ)

Malleus is the soft type of person and I feel like he’d give up easily if it was you lol.(｡•́︿•̀｡)

Even if his apology was heard but not accepted, he’d gladly say his sorry no matter how much time and patience it will take, just for you to forgive him.༎ຶ‿༎ຶ

He’ll try to give you and Hour or two to clear your mind, then he’ll apologize!

Standing in front of your room, he’ll knock lightly at the door in front of him... No answer... So you’re still mad huh?

Leaning his forehead at the door, He’ll try to talk to you in hope for you to come out of your room. But nahhh, no signs of you leaving your room soo (´°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥ω°̥̥̥̥̥̥̥̥｀)

He’ll mutter apologies after another just in case you hear them :’D

“Y/n I’m sorry for hurting your feelings earlier... that was rash of me to say, so I truly apologize... I hope my feelings reach you.”

Hearing his voice, it would prolly sound as if he’s ready to cry any moment by now. You’d be a monster if you don’t forgive this fae cutie!!!(┛◉Д◉)┛彡┻━┻

When you finally come out of the door to see him. I bet you he’s moment away from his tear dripping down. Ó╭╮Ò

“You’re not mad now right? Then is it fine to ask if we eat some ice cream later?”

You bet that Malleus would give you the biggest  cheeriest grin in the entire world! oh the things you keep doing to him never surprises him. Pls dont leave this cinnamon roll or else-

That's it cuties! I need to sleep now- my classes are thriving, but I'm not!!!

God, school stuff are taking away my precious freedom and time for writing smh.

Oh god, I'm ranting again... What's new? AHHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAH

Anyways, I need to woosh now and I hope you enjoyed this one!!!

[stray-tickles]

obvi i'm gonna ask for jonmartin 😚

AAAAH YES, honestly the only reason I reblogged that thing, LOL! They are my boys and I love them

1. Who has the cutest tickle laugh?

Ahhhh, how am I supposed to CHOOSE? Ask either of them and they'll say the other because they're in love and they're both total cuties. Martin's a lot more squeaky and is kind of embarrassed about it, but Jon's giggly as fuck and it's adorable cos he's usually so serious. Personally I think Jon, but it's close.

2. Who is ticklish in unusual places and where would that be?

I mean I headcanon Jon as being ticklish basically everywhere, so there's that, lol. I think he'd have one spot on his lower back that'd actually be a SPOT though.

3. Who gets cheer-up tickles?

Both seriously, Jon's really not good at communicating his feelings so if he's sad/upset he'd just kind of sulk about it until Martin sighs, demands he tell him what's wrong, and then murders him with soft tickles that Jon can 100% escape at any time.

4. Who takes advantage of the other one getting their arms stuck while taking off their shirt?

Holy crap Martin though? Martin is such a shit, he absolutely would at the first possible opportunity, my goodness, and Jon would get so shrieky and blushed, it's so much worse when his arms are just stuck and he can't see and Martin's basically hugging him while tickling and omg. After the first time, Jon might get stuck in his shirts a little too often to be totally plausible, not that Martin's complaining.

5. How did they discover each other’s ticklishness?

lol, so many choices! I am a sucker for the idea that Jon didn't even know he was ticklish until Martin found out, the guy is so quiet and prickly, he doesn't exactly exude affection. He's mostly surprised, Martin is apologetic at first (even though inside he's dying from the cute) because he really didn't mean to but then Jon demands he do it again and figure out where he's ticklish (for research purposes of course) because hey, this feels like something he should know about himself, and Martin gives him this crooked grin and goes 'well, okay then!' and next minute Jon is just dying and it turns out he's actually really fucking ticklish, but it doesn't escape either of their notice that he's barely struggling and not protesting at all, and by the time he's out of breath and all curled up and blushing and giggling he can't even argue when Martin notes that he likes it.

On one rare morning that Jon wakes up before Martin he tries to be romantic and wake him by kissing his neck/cheek all gentle. Martin wakes up giggling to Jon grinning at him like 'ah, ticklish ears?' and doesn't wait for an answer before diving in, kissing and nuzzling. He doesn't stop giggling for a long time.

6. Who can’t take tickle bites?

Hahahahaha, neither. Start nomming on Jon's ribs and he begins quoting the Geneva convention (or at least trying to). Nibbles on Martin's ears make him scream, which embarrasses him to no end but Jon thinks it's amazing.

7. Who has to be tickle-forced out of bed in the morning?

Jon holy crap are you kidding? The man doesn't get anywhere near enough sleep on the regular but once he's in bed it's a huge task to get him out. Most of the time Martin doesn't mind because he really does need his rest, but every once in a while they have actual plans and Jon really should get up, and it's pokey fingers into the blanket burrito until Jon's wriggled himself fully off the bed.

8. Who gives up in a tickle fight?

Oooh, such a toughie! Jon's definitely more ticklish but also he loves it so he wouldn't give up for a long while. Not to say Martin doesn't love it, but I think Jon's more likely to go instantly floppy the moment Martin attacks, and decide to get revenge later if he's not dead by then. If it does turn into a battle of wills, I think Jon would cave just from the embarrassment; if Martin breaks out the teasing he's done for.

9. Who is in danger of getting hurt when attacking the other?

I think they'd both be pretty good honestly, they can hold themselves back enough not to hurt each other, and they're both pretty adamant that they refuse to do so. Martin taps out when he realises he's approaching the point where he won't be able to keep himself from flailing around.

10. Who always provokes the other into tickling them and how?

Jon 100%, all of the time. He's an awful liar so it's always really obvious what he's doing, and if Martin's feeling particularly evil he plays dumb for a while and pretends he doesn't know. Sometimes they're cuddling and every movement of Martin's arms makes Jon jump, other times Jon happens to need a lot of things that are up on the top shelves and has to stretch out to reach them, once or twice he plays a little trick on Martin that he knows will have consequences. The only thing he can't do, apparently, is just ask. The closest he's ever gotten was when Martin was being particularly mean and ignoring all of his provocations, and he curled up next to him on the sofa, bright red, and mumbled to the floor 'um, can you- p-please...' and Martin gives him this little grin and goes 'tickle you?' and Jon nods and then Martin rains down hell.

[shozaii]

hello! may i request some fluffy hawks headcanons? stuff like cuddling, taking care of each other or maybe even when hawks gets jealous! simple things ig :>

(a/n): helllooooo, anon! that sounds so wholesomeee ahhhh 🥺 i’m so glad to be writing headcanons of the bird boy for you! i hope you like it!

masterlist.

-------------------------------

red wings.

hawks (keigo takami) x reader headcanons

now when we’re talking about keigo, we’re talking about love and devotion to his s/o 24/7. no doubt. it’s just the way you make him feel so loved. so pure. all his life it’s been really blank, constantly being faced with dull faces from his agency - but then there’s you. the glow you give off. your smiles. 

when he knocks on the door of your shared apartment, you’re already there, waiting to run into his embrace. and just that makes him fall in love with you even more than before. due to your height difference, he picks you up as you shower him with all the kisses he has missed throughout the day.

and he returns them too. he loVES the feeling of your lips on his. he even knows the type of kisses you give him,,, no cap. like, the good morning kisses. or the ‘i’m gonna miss you’ kiss. ‘you’re back home!’ kiss. he named them.

you call him ‘bird brain’ sometimes, but he responds with teasing you to the max, leaving you all flustered.

one day, you were feeling down - it was just one of those days. he notices it immediately, so he holds you.

“hey chickadee. wanna talk about it?”

“i don’t know, keigo.”

he knows how to help in these situations - it was like he was born with it. he then envelops the both of you in his wings. and the two of you stay that way.

“i’m here for you, babe. just you and me, in this little portal. isn’t it cool?”

“thank you, keigo,” you said, finally cracking a smile after a long time.

it was a private haven, safe and secure for the two of you.

keigo’s schedule is pretty jumbled up, but knowing that you understand his conditions - man, could there be anything else he would ask for? you were perfect in his eyes.

he. loves. being. the. big. spoon. a whole lot. he’s on the couch, and he has you laying on his chest. this little moments where he just gets to admire your facial features. the atmosphere is just so relaxing, too.how you tend to blush when he wraps his arms around you.

“look at you,” he says, pecking your lips. and seconds later, he would even boop your nose. such a cutie.

he would never, ever complain if you were to be the big spoon. he enjoys it(and gains a boost of confidence), especially when he receives it after a long day of work. and yes, he would even fall asleep. it’s the best feeling he’s had in forever.

tickle wars are a must!!! you two would be in the bedroom, and he suddenly grabs you from behind and tickles you with all his might. he does this because he isn’t as sensitive as you.😌 don’t worry, he stops eventually but the war goes on with pillow fights.

oh my god when you stroke his wings he’s like this happy little baby🥺 i headcanon keigo having a liking for his s/o’s hands. he gives them little pecks, intertwines them with his fingers,,, so imagine smoothing his wings...yES.

he likes styling your hair! he usually sees you giving it brushes, and enjoys how poofy it feels. so cue him helping you out.

would 10/10 take you for flights. he wants you to trust him and his skills as a pro hero - but if you were afraid of heights, he would understand it, he a good boi! :>

he’s a flirt. a flirt who has eyes for you and you only. so imagine him seeing you with someone else. he doesn’t exactly show that he’s jealous, he’s a pretty chill person in general. so what does he do when he sees that, you ask?

he just casually walks over to you, slithering his arm around your waist, right in front of the person who made you uncomfortable. he knows, with that simple touch, it would make you feel reassured.

and then he just gives this hidden death stare to that person. highlight the word, ‘hidden.’

“are you okay, birdie? i hope i didn’t scare you,” he finally asks, when the said person just takes off, not bothering to ask who he is.

“scare? no way. you saved my life, keigo.”

“another job well done for wing hero : hawks,” he smirked as he earned a slap on his shoulder from you.

overall, keigo falls for you every day. he yearns for you everyday. adores you. any word he finds, he uses them for you. euphoria defines your relationship with keigo.

——————————————-

(a/n): there you go, anon! hawks is my favorite pro hero ankskn and i hope i did him some justice! sending you my love <3

[hazard-queen]

Bonjour, Mademoiselle Rano! Request is still open right? If yes, can I have a headcanons with Idia, Jamil and Vil with a sick s/o? Also, take care of yourself, 'kay? :(

Hello~♡

Sure thing~♡

Awww you too please don't overwork yourself ~♡

Take care and have a good day ~♡

Idia sharoud

• You slowly opened your eyes tired, breathing was a heavy mission here since it felt too hot yet cold, you sat in your bed and tried to stand up only to be slammed back to your bed again.

• The second You rised your hand to your forehead you know you have a fever, you went back to your bed unable to move, you needed water but it was so far from you, the only thing you could think about that you need help in here, you picked up your phone texting idia to come...yes it's impossible for him to get out of his room but you had to give it a try!

• (Idia, I'm sick and tired , can you come help me please?) He silently looked at the message and quickly searched it up on how to aid a sick person and made quick list on things he has to do and what should he bring you

• He quickly brought soup ingredients (who will make this tho) orange juice and some medicine and the rest of the list, sooner you heard knocks on the door, you slowly leaved your bed and took some slow steps towards the door,you supported yourself by the wall so you won't fall, you opened the door to see the worried idia and ortho standing there.

• Idia's eyes widened on seeing you in this state, you were pale and your eyes were swollen as you were struggling to stand , "are you ok?" Was all he could say since it's new for him to leave his room.

• "Don't worry!" You said with a weak smile, idia supported you back to your bed and congratulations now he forgot everything he read and now he's confused.

• "Nii-san!, shouldn't we make soup for (y/n)?" Said ortho with a closed eye smile

• "S soup? Oh yeah sure...." idia walked with ortho to where they can cook, ortho already saw some videos so he was a natural while idia stood there holding the onion on his hand and looking at it like...can you please cook yourself? "Cut it nii- san!" With a sigh ortho guided his older brother

• And once idia started cutting it tears were running from his eyes like waterfall! So thanks to ortho told idia he can go see what you need and he will do the soup for you, thank you ortho!

• "Ummm what can i do for you?" Stood idia awkwardly not exactly knowing what to do anymore

• "Ummmm can you please fix the pillow for me? And i need some water if you don't mind" you said in a low voice since you were fighting to get words out of your throat, idia did as you asked and poured some water for you but now he's unsure if he have just to handle it to you or help you drinking it so he decided doing the second as he put the glass to your lips and supported you with the other arm.

• The soup was ok since ortho did his best yet it tasted kinda strange but anything hot to eat at this time is appreciated, of course idia forgot about the wet cloth he had to place on your forehead and ortho had to remind him.....and also about the medicine.

• "Ah ummmmm is there's anything else i can do for you before i leave? Should i stay? Are you feeling any better?" Poor idia it was his first time aiding a sick person before so he was totally unsure about if what he did was the proper thing or now.

• "Calm down idia! You did a great job here and i feel much better now already thank you....and you too ortho!" You laughed abit since idia's face turned all red hearing your appreciation to him.

• He leaned and placed a small kiss on your forehead with a small shy smile that could be itself better than any medicine you got today.

• "Get well soon my sweetie"

Vil schoenheit

• "What's wrong potato?" Vil rised an eyebrow looking at your pale weak form approaching him

• "N nothing vil, I'm just tired" you said weakly as you made your way to him, he gave you a questioning expression since that's new for him to see you like this.

• "Did you do your hair today? Your skin care routine? Why there's no make up on your face?" Vil started scolding you and you could no longer stand on your feet as you fell into vil's arm who quickly reched to hold you not to fall to the floor.

• He carried you bridal style and put you into the bed, there was something off about you, you were struggling to breathe and both your nose and cheeks were red, he placed his hand on your forehead and his eyes widened.

• "You're burning!"

• He reached to get a bowl of cold water and a towel, he placed the wet towel on your forehead and went to ask students to prepare you medicine and other things.

• You opened your eyes to see worried vil sitting on the chair by you and a cold wet towel on your head, on seeing you awake he called for rook to bring something, it was a cup of ment tea it feels so good drinking it with a sour throat, on finishing it vil brought a thermometer and placed it into your mouth to measure your temperature that was still hot.

• He prepared you a bathe full of all luxurious perfumes and soap he has to cool your temperature , after that he began to dry your hair and put you some make-up cause he can't bare to see you like that! Not that you don't look elegant but to see you tired and weak like that.

• He brought you a plate if oranges and started peelin it(thank god it's not an apple), with fork he took a piece of it and put it close to your lips and his hand under it not to fall on your clothes.

• "Say ahhhh" vil gave you a big smile as you took it into your mouth and looked at him with a small smile, it's rare to see vil cares so much about anyone like that.

• You started feeling cold much more like freezing, vil looked at you in concern then he looked left and right for an additional blanket but he didn't find any, went to his room he took covers from his bed and went back to you covering you with it tucking you so the warmth won't find anywhere to escape.

• "Are you feeling better my potato?" Asked vil with kind eyes.

• You tried to sit in your bed as he gave you a hand to support you, you noded and gave him a thankful smile.

• "Thank you for taking care of me vil!" You said smiling and it somehow made heat rush into his face.

• "What are you saying potato? That's my duty!" Said vil pouting yet still blushing.

• "As my dorm leader?" You asked with a sneaky expression, he blinked twice before his face turned red again,he tried to deny but his face said the opposite.

• "Ah ummm anyway get well soon potato! And don't forget both skin care and hair routine....if you need anything call me no call rook or epel...."he said leaving the room leaving you laughing from how sweet vil was.

Jamil viper

• "JAAAAAMMMIIIIIIIIIILLLLLLLLL!!!!!"

• Jamil was about to drop the plate from his hand when he heared kalim calling for him...it wasn't like a call....it was like if a rocket was falling on his head.

• "WHAT IS IT KALIM?!" Jamil got frustrated from kalim...he could have just came close and tell him not smashing his ear drums tho!.

• "(Y/n)!" Kalim was panting like if he took the whole way running to there, "what happened to her?" Jamil's heart sinked for a moment and a dozen of thoughts came and left his mind what could have happened to you.

• "She *pants* fainted in the lesson today and they took her to the infirmary!" The second jamil heared this he got panicked like the whole world has stopped.

• "Jamil what are you doing? Forget about everything go check on her!" Said kalim to jamil who looked at him in a shock then he nodded and started running to the infirmary.

• He entered the infirmary to see your sleeping form, you looked pale and tired, he knew it you were overworking yourself again with study and helping the headmaster and do his work...you of course skipped meals didn't you?, he was so deep in thought and an annoyed expression drew on his face but it all faded when you opened your eyes and called him.

• "Jamil? What are you doing here....what am i even doing here?" You looked around you since the last thing you remembered was you being in history class like normal, jamil supported you to sit as he took a seat by you.

• "They said you lost conscious in the class.....(y/n)....when did you sleep yasterday? What was the last thing you ate? Did you even had breakfast?"

• You kept silent, you did nothing from what he said, he sighed as he stood up and left...."you gave me no choice!" Was all he said before he left.

• It was almost half an hour or even more till jamil came back holding a tray on his hand full of different kinds of food, frutes and all kinds of nuts you know and you did not know!, he placed the tray on the bed in front of you and now you exchanged stares.

• "Now eat!"

• Jamil was straight! If he said eat then you should eat, and tbh only the smell or the colours of the food surved to you is enough to make you drool,you were about to eat but you stopped.

• "I will eat only if you eat with me!" You said with a cutie pouting face, you know how to make him do what you want right? He sigh and decided eating with you......(wait...is it even allowed to bring food to infirmary?)

• jamil noticed you're not eating well again so he decided to feed you! He took a full spoon from the plate in front of you and gave you the order!

• "Open your mouth!"

• "But jamil!"

• "Open!"

• He gently gave you a spoon after a spoon till the plate became empty, he started peeling an apple for you...

• "Jamil i can't!"

• "You can!"

• With the most big smile he could have he pushed a piece of apple into your mouth, he didn't stop feeding you until you cried for help!

• "Ummm sorry jamil....i disturbed you from doing your duty today" you said with a frown jamil pinched you softly in your cheeks as a response!

• "You're my duty! And i don't want to hear things like this again!"

And to make sure you're not woverwoking yourself with work again jamil took the day off to stay with you~♡

[surveys-at-your-service]

Survey #387

“today i woke up, & i hate myself”

What common problem have you never experienced? The loss of a close family member (that doesn't include pets). Alternatively, what's an uncommon problem you have experienced? Homelessness. Do you know anyone who opposes marriage equality? I sure do. What was the last thing you got really emotional about? Meerkat Manor: Rise of the Dynasty premiering. What's the longest amount of time you've been ill for? I don't really know. I don't get sick a lot at all. Who is your closest male friend? Girt. Do you know anyone who hunts for meat? Sadly. I say "sadly" because it's not like they need it. Have you ever lived with a boyfriend/girlfriend? Yes, although I wasn't a technical resident. I was there all the time, though. What do you wash dishes with? Sponge, scrub brush, rag, something else? A sponge. Is there anything you prefer to do the old-fashioned way? There's probably something, but I can't think of anything. Do you put your glasses and mugs right side up or upside down on the cabinet shelf? Upside-down. What was the worst part of your childhood? My parents fighting. Have you ever seen a high school relationship last long-term? (like 10+yrs) Yeah. Do you know any cancer survivors? Quite a few. Leftover pizza for breakfast... yay or nay? Good shit, man. Do you personally know anyone who's a psychopath or sociopath? I don't think so. What is your most used kitchen appliance? Lately, it's been the apple slicer. I've been on a real apple slices + peanut butter kick lately. What is something that you would personally like to be remembered for? For being a caring person towards all living things. Have you ever been diagnosed as clinically depressed before? Yes. Do you like bowling? Yeah, it's fun. Do you own binoculars or nonoculars? What do you use them for? No. Do you ever wish you had a telescope on the roof or attic to stargaze? Yeah, that'd be cool. Have you ever had to deal with someone close to you going off to war? No, thankfully. Who do you feel you have the most in common with? Sara, easily. Who in your life causes you the most stress or negative feelings? My damn self lmao. Have you ever had a teacher that also taught your parents? No. My parents didn't grow up in NC. What’s one thing that people definitely CAN’T count on you for? To remember like... anything. What about something they definitely can count on you for? Someone to listen to encourage them. What’s one food that you want to try but haven’t yet? I've always thought macaroons look good. Do you have anything planned for the summer? No. Do you walk fast or slow? Slow. Would you consider yourself an adrenaline junkie? No. What is a common slang word from where you live? Plural "you" does not exist. It's "y'all," lol. What’s the scariest thing you’ve accidentally found on the internet? *shrug* Probably something as a kid, going on those sketchy websites with loads of games and stuff. Thinking of every Halloween costume you’ve had, which one was the most creative? I don't think I've had any creative costumes for Halloween. What’s one random city you want to visit? It's not exactly "random" as it's a popular location, but anyway, I would love to visit Venice. What subjects do you or did you get the worst grades in? Math. When was the last time you ate cake and what type of cake was it? That's a good question, actually. Maybe my niece's birthday in February? I don't remember what kind of cake it was. Do you have photos to go with all of the contacts in your phone? No; I don't have any. Do you like snowy winter days or do you prefer rainy days? SNOWY! Name 3 things you find most beautiful in nature: Mountains, large waterfalls, and desert dunes in the wind. If you could ask one person one questions and get a completely honest answer who would it be and what would you ask? Jason. I'd ask if he thought I was emotionally abusive. What is your favorite winter activity? Building snowmen. Who is the greatest singer who is no longer living? Freddie Mercury. What is your idea of heaven? I don't know, really... I have to ask myself IS there a heaven in eternity? Living forever just... doesn't appeal to me. "Living" is an odd word to use there, but hopefully you get it. Existing on and on and on and on seems like it'd just be a drag, but at the same time I do like the thought of feeling relentlessly happy and peaceful with my loved ones. I guess that would be my definition of it, if it does exist. What’s one of the scariest things you’ve ever done? ODed. Have you ever watched the Superbowl all the way through? Just once, on my 16th birthday because I was at Jason's place and all of his family was watching it. I had absolutely zero interest, but we wanted to hang with the family. If you had to move to another country, where would you move? Canada. Do you watch American Horror Story? I haven't in years. It was Jason's and my first "show," and the first season was excellent. I lost interest in the second one, honestly. I'd be up for watching other seasons, though. How many relationships have you been in this year? None. What's your favorite cereal? Probably Cinnamon Toast Crunch. That's also the only cereal where I can happily drink the milk afterwards. Twitter or Facebook? Facebook. Do you like to paint your nails? No. What's the coolest place you've ever been to? Disney World, probably. Have you ever punched anyone? No. What's something you wish you knew how to do? Cook. :/ I really need to make an effort to learn. It'd be great to not rely on a microwave for the rest of my life. What's a celebrity that everyone likes but you don't? *shrug* What food do you eat the most? Probably bread in some form or another. That really needs to stop. Green or purple grapes? Either one, but they have to be firm. I cannooooooot with soft grapes. Have you ever cried over a text? Yeah. What's the background of your phone of? My lock screen is this pretty, simplistic periwinkle color with "work on you for you" written on it. It's one I plan on keeping for probably a long time because I connect to it so deeply with my stupid damn head frequently demanding I have to improve "for Jason" to prove him wrong. Which is a very unhealthy mindset to have, I know. My home screen is a cute lil Mark edit someone made with a very similar pale blue background, so my phone is just currently an #aesthetic. Do you have a Snapchat? No. What's your favorite sports team? (if you like sports)? I don't like sports, but I'm biased towards the Carolina Hurricanes hockey team because of my dad. Last thing you ate? I had Honey Nut Cheerios for breakfast. Do you take a lot of selfies? Definitely not. I just hate how I look so much; it takes way too much effort for me to get an "acceptable" one. Do you prefer strawberries or cherries? Strawberries. I hate cherries. How many hours of sleep did you get last night? Maybe like, three. -_- Our A/C is still out, and it was like, 87 in the house last night. It was impossible to sleep. Do you listen to music daily? Not EVERY day, but usually. Biggest insecurity? My weight. Do you play video games? Not as much as I used to. I'd probably play way more if I actually had a PS4 + the games I'm DYING to have. Do you consider yourself lazy? "Yes, but a lot of it is also health related for my lack of energy and motivation." <<<< This for me as well. What recently made you laugh? I was watching a bit of The Nanny with Mom yesterday. We love that show. Do you like gummy bears? Yep. What was the last song you listened to? I'm randomly hooked on "My Nocturnal Serenade" by YOHIO. Like, I've known the song for a long time, but NOW I'm bingeing it???? Describe your mom with one word. Selfless. What's the biggest turn-off? Probably being misogynistic. But being a cocky ass is definitely high up there, too. What fish scares you the most? Mfkng whale sharks terrify me. How do you feel about snails? They're cuties!!! What's your favorite app? Pokemon GO. Would you rather time travel into the past or future? The future, to see what's coming. I feel like you could come back with some pretty valuable information. What is the saddest song you've ever heard? I think "Terrible Things" by Mayday Parade has to come on top. What insect do you hate the most? I was reminded that stag beetles exist last night, and omfg those. Well, "hate" is the wrong word, really, I'm just terrified of them. Would you ever have a wild animal as a pet if possible? I 110% want to rescue an opossum, emphasis on "rescue." I'm not plucking one from the wild or anything like that. I would be in HEAVEN raising one of those angels. Are there any decorations that makes you happy? (lights, candles, plants..) I love those beds decorated with fairy lights, and just Christmas lights in general. Halloween and Christmas decor tend to give me sparks of happiness when I see 'em. Does race matter to you when it comes to dating? Not at all for me. When was the last time you painted something? Not since I was still in school and took a Painting course. When was the last time you really felt alive, and what were you doing? I have NO idea. What is one question you would like an answer to? Why the worst things tend to happen to good people. Name one favorite thing to do with kids while babysitting. I don't babysit, but if I was to be in charge of a kid, I'd love to teach them to play video games from my childhood. Playing Pokemon with my niece and nephew is always a blast, ahhhh. Name one flavor you like. Strawberry is pretty consistent. Name one thing you are hoping for. Venus' new terrarium soon... big sigh. I can't for the life of me find one that's a reasonable price and also adequately sized. I'm willing to put the rest of my cash into it, but Mom is helping, so I can't just buy the first one I see. Then I'd need more substrate, I seriously want a temperature gun and hygrometer, a cool hide, sticks and stuff for cover... It's going to be expensive, but I want Venus to have a truly proper environment she can thrive in. Write the name of one of your imaginary friends from when you were younger. Oddly enough, I can't remember the imaginary wolf that was my "friend." I say "oddly" because his whole idea was important to me as a weird-ass kid. Name one girl's name that starts with a "J" that you like. "Justine." Name one boy's name that starts with a "J" that you like. Maybe "Jaxson." Have you ever been kissed? Yeah. Have you ever feared that you would be killed? It's never been like, a fear I actively worry about. I just acknowledge it's always a possibility for anyone. What is the last great opportunity you missed? This was quite a while ago by now, but I'd say by dropping out of school, I really let photography opportunities slip since I became the newspaper photographer...