#how can i obtain this man irl

[bone-yarrow-art]

chibo while i practice facial structure, I am gnawing on this man he's doing things to my mental health

[yarrayora]

see, like, sometimes i see bsd fans commenting about how it's weird for asagiri to make the tanizaki siblings incestuous or the whole lolicon gag with mori and elise but the thing is both of those things are based on the real life tanizaki junichiro and mori ougai's works

naomi is, of course, based on the novel naomi, a story about a man who groomed a young girl into a westernized woman and it ends up with her turning the table by dominating his life. which is why the junichiro in the manga is unable to say no to his sister. while the irl work is mostly a commentary about the cultural change in taisho period, the siblings in the manga focuses on the unhealthy relationship of the protagonist jouji and naomi. you might find it disgusting and that's okay. but the character dazai is also created based on the real dazai osamu's uncomfortable depiction of humanity's ugliness. it just doesn't make sense to allow one depiction but not the other.

elise is named after the love interest in the dancing girl, but the power that creates her is named after the real mori ougai's erotic novel that is secretly about his own sexual experiences. you can argue that there is no need for elise to be a child because the character in the dancing girl isn't one, and vita sexualis itself is more about the author-slash-protagonist's struggle with having sexual desires in a society that champions moral purity.

but the thing is elise isn't even a fanservice character. she isn't depicted as someone the audience should find desirable for one. when it comes to lolicon fanservice you can expect either excessive depiction of innocence or at the very least elise getting jealous when mori gives attention to someone else. but even her mocking is just that, mocking. we were never shown her returning mori's affection even in a tsundere way.

the biggest hint is actually the fact that in beast au, a timeline where mori gives up his position as the mafia boss, elise is an adult. it shows that the child form of elise is symbolic of mori's desire to control those with the power he wants to obtain i.e. dazai and yosano. it's so much easier to gain power over other when they're a child and you're the authority figure, after all. so when he no longer chases after that ambition, elise becomes an adult.

tldr; asagiri didn't necessarily make tanizaki siblings and elise for the sake of fanservice but it's definitely because he actually pays attention to the literature that inspires him

[transfemme-shelterdog]

Ugh I get so annoyed when I see posts hating on transmascs who call out transandrophobia. Someone I’ve been following a lot time shared a post basically saying we just don’t have it as bad, but that that doesn’t mean we have it bad and that we don’t need to make it a competition. All the ppl reblogging were transmasc and acting like it’s so ridiculous and we’re trying to just play the victim. It seems so absurd to me because they are literally framing it as a competition by saying it’s inherently harder, when I think experiences can vary pretty hugely from person to person. They also claim that femininity is just inherently harder to obtain than masculinity but I just really can’t help but feel like that’s a completely unfounded thing to say too because masculinity is incredibly hard too. Like, I have been clocked as trans by cis people so many times for the tiniest most insignificant things, and cis dudes are always harassing each other for behavior that’s not seen as masculine enough. It’s just so upsetting because it’s such a widespread belief in the community. I have trouble finding other trans ppl irl because of where I live, but the one trans woman who I have met and am friends with is very heavy in that sort of belief and just feel exhausting that anytime I try to talk about things that have happened to me she always scoffs and acts like she thinks I’m just making it up, for whatever reason. She is a very kind person with a great heart, but it still hurts to be dismissed like that. Idk it just feels like I’m surrounded by transphobic cis people, have been assaulted both physically and sexually, and then I meet one friend who I feel like could understand but she thinks I’m just trying to compete to say I’m oppressed for no reason. I just don’t understand at why we can’t even talk about it online without being called names or ridiculed.

Speaking as someone who grew up male for 26 years, and also still presents as male in my workplace, which is majority men, I can confirm that men do in fact rip on each other for the most miniscule things. Like, if you don't do masculinity exactly how one guy does it, you're gonna get ripped on. Men are always ripping on other men, it's seen as a rite of passage and form of bonding and friendship. It's odd, but that's kinda how men are I guess. Can only imagine how much harder it would be for a trans man to try to balance masculinity just the right way so that they don't get ostracized too much.

I'm sorry that the trans woman in your life is like that. You deserve to have your voice heard, and believed. You should have someone you can vent to, and talk about your lived experiences, without being mocked or scoffed. I know I don't know you IRL, but you can always vent to me via dms, or asks, and I can respond and publish them (unless you don't want me to, just say so). I'll always be here for you, no matter what. You have at least one trans woman on your side, dear. <3

[skiagraphe0]

As much as I love Disney Dreamlight Valley, I never feel more aware of how much I'm not supposed to be playing the game as I do when the Star Path's rewards include an outfit + hair for women and feminine presenting people, but not for men or masculine presenting people.

I'm not a dude who's afraid to wear some "girly" things. My dad is a pre-Boomer who played with dolls, in an era where that got him beat up. I have never had an aversion to bracelets or necklaces. I have all my rings organized in boxes and a jewelry organizer on my sink. I can wear the jewelry fine in-game because I am the kind of man who matches my glass ring to my blazer. I actively seek to obtain more piercings than my DDV character would ever want.

But the Disney fandom has a lot of women. I've had to say "my boyfriend" a lot when interacting with them because otherwise, I would get anons telling me I was into Disney solely to get chicks. (As we all know, women cannot resist a man who has deep thoughts on The Tigger Movie.) There's a lot more well-written women characters in Disney than in a lot of franchises, and although I'm sure if you crunched the numbers the actual ratio is probably 50/50, the vibe in fandom spaces and among a lot of people IRL, especially dudes, is that Disney is for girls/women. Men are supposed to outgrow animation and stories with happy endings and not watch media with female leads.

I'm not unaware that Disney corporate probably thinks something similar about men like me. We are not supposed to be here. But they could've thrown in a closed version of Aladdin's vest and had it be wearable by women playing the game, and his pants are inarguably gender-neutral.

Between this and the number of outfits in the premium shop that are feminine (whilst I have yet to see one in the shop that's masculine), I'm beginning to wonder if Disney realizes that not every woman wants to dress this way, either. The frills, the bows, the cuts of the skirts and dresses - a lot of women I know IRL would find this far, far too youthful of a look for them to feel interesting in putting on their character.

I have no problem with grinding to get things from the Star Path. I am working on the very last bonus reward as we speak. It just would've been nice to have... idk, a shirt? Pants? A little fez? as a redeemable prize.

[hippieghost]

@that-sure-is-a-person

Hope you don't mind me making this it's own post but I wanted to go more in depth than a comment would make. I'm breaking this into two parts: deck building and obtaining cards

Part 1 - deck building and what to build around

If you're just starting to get into MTG, the biggest advice I can give for deck building is to focus more on card synergy than on building a big collection.

What I mean is this - there's a lot of strategies that work really well in mtg, but it can be really overwhelming building a deck when there's so many options available. The best way to counter this is to pick one strategy and make sure your deck does it well.

For this example I'm gonna turn to the current set, and find a card that we can use to build around. Bloomburrow (the most recent set at the time of this writing) is mostly focused on kindred decks, meaning decks that do well when you have a lot of the same creature type. For this example, I'm going to use this guy:

Squirrels. Sure. Why not?

We're gonna kill our opponent with squirrels.

So the above creature has a power and times of 2/2, with it's ability, if another squirrel is on the field, it becomes a 3/3, and so on. He's a rare, so might be a bit tougher to come across, but easier to get our hands on than a mythic rare card.

Let's see what cards work well with him.

Ah, here we go.

Notice how each card here synergizes with squirrels. Our dreyleader is uncommon, and arguably better than the rare we built the deck around. It doesn't have a constant +1/+1, but it starts out with counters that functionally give the same thing, and it keeps those counters if your creatures start to die. It also gets another every time a squirrel or food enters the battlefield under your control.

Squirrel nest and chitterspitter will be great for pumping out more squirrels, but chitterspitter has the extra benefit of giving your squirrels a buff by sacrificing one. All of these buffs stack, so having squirrel horde and chitterspitter both out will give the horde +2/+2 for every squirrel.

From here you can throw in more cards to pump out tokens, or other squirrels that have other effects. There's a few ways this can go, but finding 2 or 3 cards to base your deck around helps alot.

A few other notes -

In most formats you can have a max of 4 of any card. You have to have a minimum of 60 cards in a standard deck.

But Cece? You say, what if I want more than 60?

That's the devil talking. The closer you are to 60 cards, the more likely it is you'll draw one of the cards you actually need.

What about land?

This really depends on the deck. Arena uses 24 as the default, but if you have a lot of cards with low mana cost, you can go fewer. If you have a lot of resource heavy cards, you need to go higher. This deck seems to revolve around cards with a mana cost of 3, which is fairly low. We can probably get away with running fewer lands.

My suggestion: count the man's symbols in the top right of every card. You should start off with about half of the total number of mana symbols for your lands, and then adjust from there.

Part 2: obtaining cards

Since you're playing arena, you get a chance to practice already. The easiest way I find to get cards both in arena and irl is by doing drafts.

Drafting is fairly simple. You open a pack, pick a card you want, and pass the pack to the left. At the end, you use all of the cards you've picked and some lands to build a 40-card draft deck. You then compete against other drafters in best of 3 matches to potentially win more packs of cards.

Best case scenario you get the top prize, but most players will usually come home with an extra pack or two.

In the worst case scenario, so long as you picked cards that work with each other, you go home with the same amount of cards that you would have by spending the same amount on booster packs, and all the cards you picked out are cards you chose yourself instead of random ones.

MTG arena has a quick draft that's pretty easy to get into, and is good practice for the real deal. Don't bother spending gems on the deluxe draft. Just save your coins from playing until you can quick draft.

If you don't have drafts near you, then I'd suggest getting the larger packs that come with lands. You can usually get at least a couple decks built out of it. Most sets usually also have starter decks that you can just buy outright and tweak as you go.

A few other points -

1. Multi color decks are fun, but generally more difficult to build in a balanced way because you have to rely more heavily on balancing your lands to get the cards you need. I suggest no more than 2 colors per deck if you're a newer player until you get used to seeing how they mesh with each other.

2. Rarer doesn't always mean better. Some of the best cards in the game are commons. Focus on how they talk to each other instead of how valuable they are when building. That super rare card you pulled is useless if it doesn't have anything to work with!

3. Try every strategy at least once. My least favorite color in magic was black when I started. Now it's the color I personally do best with.

4. If all else fails, my fallback strategy is to take all my red "burn" spells (anything that does direct damage), mix em with some cheap creatures with high attack and low defense, and play super aggressive. This is called "red deck wins" and is a great way to make people mad at you.

Any questions let me know! I'm always happy to help new players get their feet wet!

[devonsrugbyexgirlfriend]

Jess Watches // Sun 17 Nov // Day 413 Synopses & Favourite Scenes & Poll

Ugly Betty (with mum) 4x13 Chica and the Man

Wilhemina is furious when she discovers she has a drag queen impersonator - Wilhediva Hater. Meanwhile Betty receives an award for her blog, which causes tension between her and Daniel. And Marc runs his own photo shoot with a famous director and actress.

A silly set up that ended strongly. Betty and Daniel are ajusting to a more balanced work life and friendship. Wilhelmina was being dragged by her irl brother, but she saved the best for last with her showstopping performance.

Buffy the Vampire Slayer (rw) 4x16 Who Are You?

Having switched bodies with Buffy, Faith enjoys freedom. Meanwhile, Buffy finds herself at the mercy of the Watcher's Council.

Did SMG get any recognition for this ep in particular? "Because it's wrong" if she didn't. The changes in how she moved and spoke were delightfully impressive, and hot af.

Star Trek: Prodigy 2x08 Is There in Beauty No Truth?

The crew detours to a colony of non-corporeal entities, who offer Zero an opportunity to obtain a physical body. Janeway discovers Dal's real intentions.

"I fear I'm a burden, but I do what I can... keep watch one day, a funny quip the next."

"I've always had this uncertainty and emptiness within, yearning to experience life, to touch and feel as you do. It might be what I've been missing."

"I've waited so long to do this. *group hug* ( sighing happily ) Now this...this feels... glorious!"

"Perhaps my body will degrade, and my senses will dull. Or maybe this is the first step in a journey of self-discovery and unknown possibility. Either way, I'll take it with those most important to me... my family."

[femmefatalevibe]

Hello, I know none of us can truly know why men do the things they do, but I wanted to know your thoughts and opinion about why mean, nasty women are able to find husbands. Recently, I've dealt with some pretty nasty women who treated me like I was nothing, even in front of their husbands. The men usually give me a solemn or embarrassed look as their wives verbally abuse me, which let's me know that they know their wife is an asshole. I know there's the whole "men like bitches" thing, that goes around in this sector, but the women I'm talking about are downright cruel. It's the type of behavior that you would think would keep most women single. I would be completely turned off by women who acted like this, if I was a man. Do you think most women start off sweet, get a ring, and then become this way? Or do you think there are some men who see no problem with marrying a cruel woman? I'm just so confused by men, because they say they want nice friendly women, but often times the worst women I've ever met have had the longest marriages. I just don't know what to make of this lol.

Hi love! I think you make a great point about how many men don't care or consider how their women partners/spouses treat other women when evaluating the potential for a relationship with another person. It's a shame, really. However, I personally believe (and have seen in IRL) that many women who are cruel to other women are the same women who kiss up, dote over, and worship men to an unhealthy degree. These cruel women, oftentimes, are the living definition of "pick-me."

I believe these women (wrongly) see other women as their lifelong competition. Their ability to obtain and sustain male attention/partnership is how they define their worth. Men's egos are inflated/continuously nourished by these women's desire to please men. These women are nice and friendly but only to men. "Achieving" a partnership with a man is their life status symbol. And for many of these women is their primary focus and, potentially their sole, source of self-validation.

Hope you found this take helpful xx

[pikespendragon67]

Pikes Summer Check-Up 2024 Edition

Started to go “hm I still have to unlearn the don’t speak unless spoken to mindset that I have” but remembered I could do a checkup post instead!

Current life updates:

Right now I’m saving up for conventions happening this August, though plushie collecting & Steam summer sales miiiight have interfered. Whoops. (…and I wonder if I should get back to my FE Cipher card collection). My next big-ish trip is visiting my middle school best friend with another high school friend. I’m also hoping for my next big trip this year to be Boston in late September to meet with a friend. After that, it should be a trip with my middle school best friend to a farm, something Halloween related with IRL friends depending on what they want to do, no clue for November, and seeing relatives for New Year’s.

Gonna see if I can reorganize my closet since everything in my room got reassembled when we got new flooring. Feels cluttered as a result. Hopefully my back won’t kill me.

Might have jury duty next week too OTL

What I’m watching:

Current schedule for watching anime is as follows:

Mondays - Digimon rewatch along with Spice & Wolf 2024. I really like Lawrence and Holo’s banter. For Digimon I just got to where Mimi obtains her Crest. Man adult me really just became Joe, huh.

Tuesdays are filler at the moment since I need to wait for Pokemon Horizons to update on Nettingtonflix (I watch the dub) and I finished Kakuriyo. Part 2 of Kakuriyo was…eh, I guess? I noticed stiff animation a lot and I didn’t really get the sense of drama/urgency that I was expecting. Might throw in some more Digimon episodes until Horizons updates. (I’m liking it so far, though it’s not something I’d shout to the heavens about)

Wednesdays - Baccano finally. I might need to rewatch some parts because they retell events from different perspectives, but I see repeats and get confused if I already watched the episode or not because of that.

Thursdays - Moribito. I’ve heard this show was good, though I think I need to rewatch this one as well since I miss important info when something dramatic’s not happening. The curse of having a show as background noise during your lunch break at work.

Fridays - Jojo’s Bizarre Adventure rewatch. Friends were talking about watching it so it got me interested in rewatching once more. I’m still on Phantom Blood but I’m excited for the rewatch until I hit Stardust Crusaders. Unfortunately it’s not my favorite part and it’s the longest.

Saturdays - My Hero Academia and Sakuna: Of Rice and Ruin. I’m gonna see if I end up liking Sakuna more as an anime or as a game. As for Hero Academia, I’m really liking how this current season’s hyping up the finale. And with the manga ending next month, I kind of hope Vigilantes can be animated

Sundays - Tower of God season 2 and My Deer Friend Nokotan. Nokotan kind of reminds me of Lucky Star, but I’m hoping the shitposts aren’t just making fun Koshitan. Tower of God season 2 looks pretty promising. Though I lament that God of High School had to rush everything into 1 season.

I’m getting hyped for TYBW part 3 subconsciously and also hope the light novels get covered.

In terms of stuff on Youtube, it’s mostly let’s plays for games that I want to see if I want to play them myself. I appreciate that SMT 5 Vengeance fleshed out certain characters more, but damn. I also finished watching the ProZD Plays Ace Attorney 2. Franziska is wonderful, I wish she was in a different game. I liked case 2 the most in spite of Hotti’s mere existence.

What I’m Playing:

Stopped TTYD in the middle of chapter 6 since I didn’t want to deal with the turning platform section. So now it’s back to 428 Shibuya Scramble. I’m in the 3 PM section of the game now and things are getting spicy. So far my rankings of the routes are Tama > Minorikawa > Osawa/Achi > Kano.

I also have quite a few fighting games in my Steam library now! I still only button mash, but I’ve been playing with some folks in the Granblue community and my friend Merlin. My “don’t speak unless spoken to” mindset unfortunately kicks in when it comes to inviting people to play games, though. Like granted people are busy and I don’t want to bother them but aaaaaaa (so if you wanna play with me on Steam I’m free most weekends. Though my wrist may fatigue itself too. F)

I’m also contemplating if I want to have various small fics in a collection or add alternate endings in my main Bleach fic

AND NOW, I end asking how ny’all are you doing. Any cool things on your end?

[theunmaker]

Please read first

I DO NOT DO COMMISSION WORK

Hey, if you message me: try to actually be capable of holding a conversation and reading or responding more appropriately than a robot or rude delinquent child- I will report you as spam because you are acting like an AI/ spam account. Or block you because you are being an unreasonable asshole. It’s a waste of both of our time. A lot of you act fucking weird, fake and authoritarian/also somehow the victim in some odd abstract scenario. Stop.

If you’re only talking to me to just lead me on and be fake or fill a dark hole in you till someone pays you for sex or whatever 80% of this app is doing.. I HAVE NEVER AND WILL NEVER PAY FOR SEX IRL OR SEXUAL CONTENT, ESPECIALLY ONLINE. As much as I respect your choice to use your body to make money however you like- you should respect me and not ask me to pay you to see your body or even converse with you. I don’t enjoy that. I’m also a real person with real thoughts and feelings. It makes all human connection here feel weird and gross. More so it’s just boring and predictable. I’d like real connection and real human conversation with like minded individuals who don’t lump me in with everyone else trying to buy them. If you’re too distracted with the popularity of your body online to make conversation more than trying to obtain cash and praise- don’t start with me? I want to say here also; a lot of you seem to think you are beyond reproach and deserve worship. Like you just demand what you want sexually with no desire to reciprocate or know or engage with another person and when a person questions it you become very defensive and disrespectful. I’m 40, I don’t find your narcissistic shitty attitude and blurry pictures sexy… I have had plenty of years of real sex and don’t immediately become aroused if some young person says they want something from me. Learn the art of communication, conversation and the dance of attraction and then maybe you wouldn’t be striving for quick, shitty orgasms online with complete strangers or thinking that everyone should just do what you say or die. It’s fucking weird man… you guys are weird.

Also- no I don’t do commission work. As much as social media and those desperate for praise will have you believe… Art isn’t customizable home decor and I’m not a fast food worker waiting to take your order. I make what I make and it turns out how it turns out because what I make matters to me and it comes 100% from my imagination and love of it. If you want to buy originals, SOME are for sale. But they also aren’t mass produced so prices will show that. I do do prints of some of my stuff and am more than willing to have a print made and framed for you if taking my original work away from me at an original work price isn’t something you are interested in.

Recently I’ve also had some very rude younger people think they can steal my work and give me lectures about how art is free. My art is right here for you to look at. That doesn’t mean I or my work need you to disrespect it. A lot of you rude opinionated people don’t display your own art work, or have years of practice or education OR responsibilities or houses and families to support and you come from upper middle class lives (admitted loudly in your words and behavior) and then you think because you draw or use your iPad sometimes to trace some shit and give it to your friends- you have the right to steal and distribute and lecture me about the purpose of art. Art is my education, constant practice, life and one of two main sources of income. I am professionally doing this and still sharing it online for free and all I really ask for is for you not to be a complete piece of shit towards me. It’s not a lot to ask.

Sorry to put a damper on any beginning interactions. But I find more often than not that this app is bots and some odd breed of prostitutes or toxic interactions with hurt people hurting people… or people just stealing other people’s personalities and work with hate filled hearts and unearned confidence. That leaves me with a deep sense of sorrow and confusion and it’s made me delete this app and my account several times. But I don’t make art for it to not be seen and heard. THATS why I’m here, why I do shows, why I have a website, why I sell what I do. I don’t do it so you think I’m amazing or praise me or even pay me, but that doesn’t mean you can take from me or disrespect me. I do it because I care about what I do and it’s a bridge to others. A way to connect without connecting physically and change myself and others from within. So I’ll keep doing it forever. Connect with me, share yourself and let’s have a real conversation, I’m here. Take care.

[keshetchai]

@highlighteretcigarettes okay so just posting tags separately because that post was getting long and this is now a whole side topic BUT!!! Re: witch-washing.

Bullet points just to organize my thoughts:

Wrt to the marketing of it all, this is something I noticed first in bookstores as someone who used to constantly hang out in the religion sections as a tween. It used to be that in chain bookstores "New Age" was either right next to general religion (aka mostly Christianity and then small spots for everything else), OR one aisle over. Nowadays I've noticed chains like B&N put MUCH more distance between the two areas - like one of my local ones has them in wholly different floors. And it's now "Spirituality" I think? A lot of the category labels seem to no longer say neo-pagan/pagan or even new age, it's just "spirituality" and "astrology."

Actually I think this is very intentional. I think I've seen this in indie bookstores too, but B&N is a definite for this: they shelve next to diet, health, and cookbooks now. Not religion. Keep in mind I grew up in a red state in a heavily Christian area, and back then, new age was still in the same general area as the rest of religion at the local Borders or Walden's or B&N. Now, it's holistic health, diet, exercise, cookbooks, and spirituality.

It doesn't escape me that this is entirely "things we can market as lifestyles that someone can buy into." These publishers clearly broke into the capitalist market and have thrived there. I suspect that for the booksellers and publishers, the distancing from the rest of religion (a "status quo") is intentional. It's like what hot topic is to goth subculture.

Although like you said, I don't think this is limited to chain stores even. I've seen plenty of small new age/spirituality/pagan shops irl, and can't recall a single one that didn't also sell tons of cheap mass produced trinkets, often hyping up their hand crafted quality or the exoticness of the item obtained. Cheap mass produced junk is probably in every religion of course, but yeah, there IS a bigger sense of "buying things" in some religions more than others. Christian evangelicals do this with precious moments figurines and their wall o'crosses decor. Pagans have their own versions of that kind of spiritual consumerism. I do often walk away with the sense that if there was a market population to support it, it would be just as capitalistic and hallmark-y. Lots of shit on Etsy is mass produced and repackaged too.

Idk if it's also free elsewhere off the top of my head, but there's an article you could read free on jstor if you sign up - search "plastic shamanism" and man oh man. 10/10 article about cultural appropriation and mass marketing of indigenous religions to non-natives.

(You probably relate to this sentiment): I am Begging EVERYONE, pagan or not, crystal bitch or otherwise: STOP BUYING LAPIS LAZULI!!!! STOP. WHO EXACTLY DO YOU THINK IS EARNING MONEY FROM MINING IN AFGHANISTAN? PRAY TELL?? Stop buying this one expensive blue rock for your energy aura or whatever.

(Also this one): Also as the child of a parent who grew up in a mining company town, and whose grandfather was a chemist for the company, (and who loved me a shiny rock long before crystal everything): stop buying overpriced rocks constantly. At least CONSIDER how they obtained these particular rocks before you buy them willy nilly. Don't buy 30 million crystals and geodes and whatever else mined and polished and all of that, and then claim to love the environment without any sense of irony. The best and coolest rocks are the ones you find and pick yourself anyways, everyone knows that.

I think this is true of any religious objects but like, the best ones are either personally crafted OR made by small artisans and it just sucks that a lot of small businesses try to pass off their goods as things they actually personally designed (even for factory production) or made, when they didn't do either. I personally have taken a lot of time purchasing/obtaining my permanent basic Judaica for a variety of reasons, my feelings about consumption and things (and Jewish thoughts on craftsmanship and beautiful things), being part of that. I think a lot of people have that struggle, where religious objects so often are kinda...produced like they're just future garbage - again, in any religion.

[nyerus]

Don't you think it's funny cause actual canon gay characters in BL manga will say "I love you" but only the shounen bromance can spew out some of the most romantic shit akin to a 19th century poet writing a letter expressing his surpressed love for his lover 😭.....

Hahaha, I definitely think it's pretty hilarious that the "no-homo, we're just bros" stuff often does produce insanely over-the-top romantic nonsense fdlgkjdflgjd It's like so you're telling me that you totally like girls and everything just fine but your entire character arc and motivations and blah blah are completely centered around another boy??? Sure okay, yeah. 👀 Like why are you as a man--

No but I think it also definitely relates to how "straight male culture" IRL is so... homoerotic in many aspects, often because of the same reasons (i.e. they're obsessed with how other men perceive them, and women are just kind of seen as objects to obtain in order to please other men) ANYWAY I obviously don't want to go too deep into that or else I might start getting weird ppl crawling all over my blog HAHA!

Also there's something to be said for the fact that "we" as a queer audience are doing a LOT of heavy lifting in these cases. Often because it's a genuinely more interesting interpretation, or just more fun lmfao. I don't have a lot of faith in most shonen authors to do any of that shit intentionally, because, well, they're shonen authors. 😭

[sungbeam]

EEEEEK ME TOO 🤭🤭 confession time pt. 2, I might have a platonic crush on you 😔💔 like I wanna be homies but at the same time I can’t have ppl knowing I read fanfics (irls or moots) cause I KNOW I’d get clowned on buT THEY JUST DON’T UNDERSTAND 🤧🤧 so, alas, WE are the true Romeo and Juliet 😔🙏

Like after I send an ask I do check in like every hour just to see if you responded yet DJGNIFN what can I say 🙄☝️

BUT AS LONG AS I CAN BE YOUR ANONYMOUS BESTIE THEN WE’RE SET 4 LIFE 😼🤞

(^ Why did I use so many emojis-)

And you’re right, Floor will be someone’s paralysis demon… MINE 💀

AND EEEEEK DON’T EVEN TALK TO ME ABT THE PROVERBIAL CAMERA CAUSE I CAN AND WILL NOT STOP TALKING ABT IT

ALSO YEAH IT WAS JUST A PIC NOT A VIDEO OF THE SCENE BECAUSE THAT SHOW IS SO WILD IF I WERE TO SHOW YOU A CLIP I THINK YOU’D START CRYING (Plot synopsis: boy tastes a girl in his class’ spit and then gets addicted to it cause she has like… addictive spit… essentially if he withdrawls from her spit then he could die 💀)

I WATCHED IT A LONGGGGGGGG TIME AGO SO I CAN’T REMEMBER EVERYTHING TOO WELL BUT THAT WAS PRETTY MUCH MOST OF IT LMAO IT WAS ENTERTAINING THO IF YOU WANNA TAKE A SHOT AT WATCHING IT 😭

NOT US ALSO HAVING THE SAME TYPE OF MENNNNNNNN (at least in txt) 🤪🤪🤪

And now hold awn world stop-

What did I just see with my two lil ol eyes

A SHIRTLESS,

TEASING,

HYUNJAE DRABBLE/FIC?????

Uh uh, uh uh, THAT WAS SO RUDE OF YOU LIKE WHY WOULD YOU MAKE ME IMAGINE THINGS LIKE THIS WITH A MAN I KNIW I CAN NEVER OBTAIN LIKE-

HAVE MERCY ON MY SOUL LIKE I WAS GENUINELY LIKE GIGGLING WHEN HE WENT IN FOR THE STRADDLE LIKE THIS I SICK GET YOUR C-CUP TIDDIES AWAY FRIM MY BOOK IM TRYING TO READ, LIKE???

Phew, everything abt Hyunjae makes my heart do somersaults istg-

But even if their storyline was there for plot convenience, I hope to see Quinn and Wren in the future!!! 😤😤

AND EEEEK LITTLE EPISODE ONE SHOT FOLLOW UPS WOULD BE SOOOO CUTE FOR CHANHEE’S LIKE I DEF SEE THE VISION AND I CAN’T WAITTTT

And the quote came from Rosemonde Gerard! “Aujourd’hui plus qu’hier et bien moins que demain,” from her poem “The Eternal Song”! It’s super sweet and it was addressed to her husband so I def recommend reading it! Man I love poetry unironically 🥹 I really hope I can find love as,,, lovely(😭) as that one day 🤧

- Love you forever + 1 day, 🌷 anon

PLS PLATONIC CRUSH FRFR ME TO ???? and it's okay bestie, none of the irls know i write or read fanfic cuz they really DON'T understand 😭 like i love my irls but they just don't TT anyways, it's totally okay that ur on anon, we can still be homies this way 😎 literally had one of my underclassmen in hs clown me for using blr instead of ao3, like IM SORRY THAT AO3 ISN'T EXACTLY INTUITIVE AND IM SLOW W TECH????? SHEESH— LMAO

omg i was just TALKING ABT SLEEP PARALYSIS DEMONS 🤩🤩🤩 one james ji chxngmxn !!! anyways—💀

.....uhm addictive spit.... okay 😃 not the greatest visual but ykw u like what u like ig 😭

THE PROVERBIAL CAMERA IS EVERYWHERE IM TELLING U I HAVE INTERNALIZED THE OBJECTIFICATION OF MY FEMALENESS SO MUCH THAT I IMAGINE WHAT PEOPLE SEE WHEN THEY SEE ME LIKE IM OBSERVING MYSELF AND IT TRANSLATES INTO MY FICS 🤡🤡🤡 like it says x reader, but really, she's just a puppet playing a role 😩🤘🏻

PLS. u have know idea how much EMOTIONAL DAMAGE HYUNJAE AND KEVIN HAVE BEEN DOING TO MY SANITY LATELY like wbk i have no dignity left, but my sanity is dropping into the negatives, the bar is in hell, and i am limboing under it 🤣🤣 i once read this thing abt the guy straddling the girl and i was like,,,, uhm,, hyunjae,,, haha,, get over here 😁

I HAVE ONE EPISODE OF THE CHANHEE THING READY BUT IM TRYING TO FIGURE OUT WHAT ELSE I SHOULD DO LMFAOOO cuz the whole idea was literally just an excuse to write that oneshot 🤡💀 anyways, i'll prob think of something, i have all summer—

omg pls i too love poetry unironically like,, one day i will meet someone who makes me write lovey dovey poetry abt warm sunlight and quiet kitchens in the middle of nowhere and not the sad espresso depresso shit i write rn 💀🤣

BUT ANYWAYS !! may ur day be as beautiful as u r !! love u 🌷 mwah 😚

[aikoiya]

It is a crying shame that your thoughts on The Little Prince are tucked away in the comments of another post. Would you mind sharing them here? :D

Oh! Thank you! 💖

I hope your Christmas was good! I gotta tell you about some of the desserts I've had later!

But yes! I very much enjoyed the book & can't wait until the movie comes in!

It was really interesting & thought provoking.

Though, like I said in the comments, I can't help but think that the narrator might have a bit of resentment towards adults. Not intentionally, I don't think, but I can absolutely feel it.

And, his commentary that an adult is unable to picture things described to them unless you give them a monetary value is ridiculous. I know that I had no trouble picturing the house with pink brick & doves. Quite the cute little description, so I'm not sure what he was going on about there.

But, as an artist, I'm glad he's been able to start drawing again. For only having drawn a few things, I think he did rather well! It's always nice to see that. :D

Anyway, I felt as though the Railway Switchman was a bit presumptuous to assume that none of the adults weren't pursuing anything & that children actually know what they're looking for. It seemed pretty dismissive, as for all he knew they knew exactly what they wanted & were making strides towards obtaining it. Or they could've been going to visit family or friends or going to attend a loved one's funeral or going to a party or taking their children on a trip to the fair for some fun or to the theater or to what their daughter's ballet recital.

And, honestly, I very much don't remember "knowing" what I wanted as a child. If anything, I know more now than I ever did. Simply put, I want to be happy. Which I am, but I'm not quite satisfied yet, though I know that I want to get closer to Jesus &, if it is the Lord's will, I want to find a good, Jesus-loving husband & to have children, but I also understand that what I want isn't always what He has in mind for us, so I'm trying to learn to be okay without it. Beyond that, I hope to become more self-sufficient on a human level (because I'll always rely on the Lord), get a job with a steady income, & some IRL friends.

Regardless, even if I don't know exactly what it is I want or how to get it, I do have an idea, whereas before, I very much didn't.

Anyway, if I'd been on that train platform, I would've likely (gently) asked the Prince if he, himself, was satisfied? After all, he was there, but hadn't been beforehand, so that meant that he also hadn't been satisfied with where he'd been. Otherwise, he would not be there. So, if that is the case, then why was HE not satisfied?

Though, like I said before, maybe I'm too terribly straightforward to have my own little planet up there.

Either way, I found it interesting how self-aware a number of the other planet occupants were. For one, the King & Conceited Man were so much less awful than I expected them to be.

The King, for instance, understood something that I'm not sure I was able to put to words before, but very much agree with: A king is sovereign & rules absolutely, BUT his orders should be reasonable. If a king were to order his subjects to do something that they couldn't or was impossible, then if they failed, it was the king's fault for ordering such to begin with. And, I agree! It is sensible & I liked that! And the note about there being a revolution if a ruler were to order his subjects to jump into the sea & drown very much reflects my own thoughts. Abusing one's power is a surefire way to get overthrown.

I'm also of the opinion that the role of a king is that of a steward &, if necessary, a martyr. Because the entire purpose of a king is to lead his subjects. As such, he must care for them. So, much like one of the lessons of the book, the people are his responsibility. They are not his slaves & their prosperity, happiness, & health (or lack thereof), inevitably, is a reflection on his capabilities & competence as a king. (In fact, it very much reflects the idea of noblesse oblige, meaning "nobility has obligations." It's honestly more so an ideal, but it's an ideal that I agree with.)

Similarly, I also brought up how I was surprised with how the Conceited Man appeared to realize that he was being a bit ridiculous & almost seemed to ask the Prince to humor him. "Do me this kindness & admire me all the same!" Which, to do a kindness means to perform an act of generosity, consideration, or helpfulness. A favor. It's just very interesting that he put it that way, is all.

I get the feeling that he might be lonely & may have self-esteem issues. He suggested that "To admire means that you regard me as the handsomest, the best-dressed, the richest, and the most intelligent man on this planet." But what if the reason he wished for such was because he actually didn't think that he was those things, but wanted to be that?

As such, I can't help but think that the Prince's parting comment may have hurt the man.

Also, the fox was very intelligent & clever. I liked him. He also made quite the bit of sense in regards to how caring for something makes it unique, if not to others, then to the one who cares.

But, yes! I liked it!

[unusualfaggot]

congrats on the introspective breakthrough, no matter the case! transitioning for me and for many people is a long road with a lot of signals, a lot of pit stops, and a lot of small steps that make up a bigger journey that isn’t always clear from the outset.

i knew i was a weird girl my whole life. in high school, i started researching labels like genderqueer and neopronouns and getting involved in trans rights, as well as joking that i was a boy. At age 18 i cut my hair short for the first time. In college i thought a lot about gender, and then had an encounter with someone, ostensibly a cis guy at the time, who had a thought provoking conversation with me about the nature of gender and its historical malleability. I started to use they/them and shaved my head, stopped shaving my legs, still mainly wore women’s clothes (although i had a few masculine pieces i had been wearing since HS). I started binding my chest - i had feared permanently “damaging” myself, a cardinal sin being raised as a girl and being told i basically existed for the satisfaction of men. I was worried i would make myself unloveable, but it felt so freeing, so natural, so right to see myself with a flat chest. Half a year to a year later i graduated to he/him pronouns, another half odd year or so and i changed my name to a masculine one, then i started HRT, or the other way around, I don’t quite remember. It took me years on HRT and a very specific life circumstance to get top surgery, and i also struggled with the “compulsory heterosexuality” of worrying about “ruining” my body even though compression had already changed my body a lot and i was and am in a loving, t4t relationship. I got top surgery and i have never been happier with my body. That’s where i’m at today, short version, and i think transition is a lifelong process i dont see myself stopping any time soon. It is not an on and off switch for most people.

my advice is to not get caught up on labels or identities, and to focus on goals and actions. find a therapist you trust, if possible, and other queer people IRL. read LGBTQ history, theory, and fiction. read feminist theory and history (and fiction). Journal - goals, pros and cons, second order thinking (if i tell my family i think i’m trans, what do i want to happen next, and what might actually happen, and how can i cope with those contingencies?)

for transitioning, and passing, also try to not get caught up in passing discourse. Passing isn’t a bad word, and passing doesn’t always mean cis passing. Modifying your appearance and behavior to flag your desired gender is a multiplayer game that requires you as well as your audience and your society to function together. Most cis people also do things to flag and affirm their genders and pass as their desired gender - its just normalized (and in fact mandated).

the things you do to pass will vary based on how you already look and what your goals are. Typical choices include visiting a men’s barber and getting a men’s haircut appropriate for your hair type, getting some sort of chest compression (gc2b, underworks, plenty of others) especially if you have a larger chest, purchasing or otherwise obtaining men’s clothing and experimenting with more masculine “dress code”, watching videos or attending tutoring for voice training, stopping feminizing behaviors like shaving ones legs or wearing makeup, and paying attention to how men in your community carry themselves, speak, and behave, and picking and choosing things that feel authentic and expressive for you while leaving behind feminine behaviors, speech patterns, etc. Again some of these may or may not apply, some come naturally with time, some things you may try and hate, some things may be obvious I didn’t list here. I will also say, that after HRT, surgery, and a longer time living as a man, its a lot easier to get away with feminine clothes, makeup, behaviors, and still pass as a queer man. You also don’t have to do any of this stuff to *be* trans, but sometimes it is easier to change yourself in a way that taps other peoples unconsciousness in the desired way than to change the unconsciousness (and consciousness) of everyone in your life. I wore women’s clothes as a man up until i was sick of street harassment. Some trans people tolerate or fight street harassment their whole lives in order to be their most authentic selves. Transitioning is a patchwork, not a prescription.

As for the social aspect… Find a trusted friend or family member and start there. Ask them to use he/him or they/them pronouns in private, maybe try a new name. grow that circle of trusted people while also exploring your gender expression as above. Then you will begin to come out to more family members who might be more difficult to confront, teachers, coworkers, and so forth. Some people will give you trouble. You have to be ready for your life to possibly change immensely, and youll be trading a devil you dont know for a devil you know. You will find that life will change drastically around you whether or not you transition, and you will make the decisions that are right for you. You should prioritize your material safety first and foremost (housing, food, employment), but again thats something thats gonna be more between you and your therapist/friends/resources.

Again this is very general advice so pick and choose what resonates with you, feel free to ask any follow up question and again good luck in your endeavors.

not really the sort of thing i would usually post but just sort of shouting into the void because the night crazies have gotten to me. i have come to recently accept that i am trans which has come with a certain freedom but has also been quite scary mostly due to current events and whatnot. this has been something on my mind for the past 7-8 years but im not really sure what to do about it. guess im just wondering how other trans folks decided transitioning was for them and what first steps they took? i’ve been unsure about this because i know i want the physical changes for sure but the social aspect stresses me out. I dont know if i even care how others refer to me because for me its more about how I see myself if that makes sense. anyways sorry for the weird post ill probably delete this later 😛

[the-fiction-witch]

Guilt

Media IRL x Historical Fantasy 

Character Thomas Brodie Sangster

Couple Thomas X Reader

Rating Spooky + Sweet

Concept Visiting

I sat hidden from the light I once embraced, the thick curtains blocked every window, every door, every crack of which sight and rumors could be obtained. I was lit only by the fire's flame as it tore away at the wooden logs before it. But these flames provided no heat, no light, no comfort. They treat me like a fool, unaware of my failings and deterioration, always speaking as if they do not exist. I know my body better than any of them and I know how it fails me now. They had locked the castle up tighter than a preacher's Bible grip all to keep the secret within. The secret that I grew ever closer to my meet with death. I had always had this meeting scheduled even if I had pushed it back more times than I can count. I no doubt kept him waiting and now he had no mercy for me. I just wanted to be alone anyway, there is knowone in this castle or on this land who could bring me comfort. I moved from my chair trying to move away from the light.

"Why must you run from the light." Her voice spoke up I didn't want to look at her still angry at her, and honestly still guiltily.

"Because I don't want to face it" 

"You never did want to face the lights, always huddled in the dark" 

"What do you want? Liza?" 

"I don't know why I bothered, but you know why Im here"  

I turned and saw her as I always did, withered and hurt in her long cover all dress with her chains glimmering in the fires light. 

"To torcher me" 

"Not to torcher. You know how I feel about torcher"

"Always the pacifist. Until it suits you"

"I come purely as a tell, of the time at hand. You know the time Thomas. Don't run from it. You know it will only make it harder for us all"

"All? I suppose your all here? To judge me? To tell me of my fate?"

"No Thomas. Only to see you" she says "I have missed you, I have always love you Thomas always." 

"Love me? Don't don't forgive me"

"I will never forgive you." She says "have you forgiven yourself?"

"... No. But I don't regret what I did" I told her and she nodded giving me that look "don't. Don't give me that look." I told her "I don't regret what I did so don't stand there and pretend I should! I never wanted to be your husband, I was thrown you like giving a dog a bone. For politics and government plans. You where never the woman I wanted!"

"And you where never the man I wanted. But I made the best of the cards I was dealt" she says "I loved you because I had to. And still I will love you no matter what you did to me" 

"Go. I don't want to see you"

"Thomas…"

"Go! I don't want to see you!"

"Because you know what you did?"

"I don't feel guilty!"

"I never said you did. Very well I'll go, I'm sure you'll find your way to the light and of not… I will pray for you in the dark" 

I forced myself away going to my desk getting the decanter filling it the glass to the brim and downing it quickly doing my best not to move as even without a word being spoken from her lips I could feel her presence and in the reflection of my decanter she stood there in her dark red dress choker around her neck her hair tight in its intricate braids the same as I last saw her. 

"Are you really that afraid of me Thomas?" 

"What do you want? You come to reveal in my ending too?"

"No." 

"Then what? You never were one to keep your tongue behind your teeth" 

"Well after one loses their head. You become far less likely to speak up" 

"So that's it. Come to make me feel guilty for what I did"

"Why?"

"What?" I asked finally turning to see her

"If you felt no guilt the moment my head hit the ground, why would you now?" 

"Then what?"

"I want to know what happened to my daughter?"

"Mila-"

"All I asked of you was to care for her."

"I did what I could"

"You sent her away, why?"

".... Because she reminded me of you." 

"Is that a bad thing?"

"It was. She had your.."

"My what?"

"The mouth. That wouldn't stay shut."

"Are you surprised?"

"No." 

"Do you feel remorse? At all? For my trial, imprisonment and execution?"

"No."

"Fair enough. Did you always know it was a lie?"

"Course. It was my idea."

"I'm sure It was my king." She says turning to go but stopping herself "that's all I ever was, wasn't it?" She asks "a passing fancy. A phase of your interest. Was it always her?"

"Always."

"Hum… my one wish, of my life. Would have been that you let me go. You could have had her. You could have just let me go and I could have had a different life."

"I am sorry Mila"

"For what?"

"For marrying you." 

"That's a horrible thing to say to a girl Thomas"

"I mean it. I never should have married you. I know that now. I robbed you of a normal life. And for that… I am sorry"

"I'm not. We both know the foolish girl I was, would have traded anything for time I had with you" 

"Would you now?"

"No. But I'm not the girl I once was. Nor are you the man you once where" she says 

"Leave me. You give me no comfort" 

"I didn't mean to. But you can't escape the visitors to come."

"Leave!" I demanded and my room was once again left to silence I knew who would be next in this line and I feared them more then any other who may visit me tonight. 

I tried to move myself to bed in hope to rest my weary body. And to avoid that which was to come but I felt her.

Those little hands. 

That sweet innocent grip on my leg 

"Daddy?" 

I tried not to break.

Not to cry. 

"Daddy? Aren't you happy to see me?"

But even after all these years of hardening. I am a man.

I am not stone.

"Of course I am" I smiled down at her little blonde head as she snuggled my leg

"I like visiting" she smiled "mostly I just play with Mummy now"

"It's nice for you to visit little one." I smiled moving to my knees so I could hold her in my arms "I'm so sorry… for everything I did. I should have been a better father to you. The biggest regret I have is sending you away"

"That's okay daddy, I forgive you" she smiled giving my cheek a kiss 

"You're such a sweet little thing. But I don't deserve to be forgiven. I took your mother from you, and then sent you away. If I had kept you here with me… I wouldn't be seeing you now." 

"True. But that's okay daddy, you did what you thought was best" she smiled hugging me tightly and I completely broke holding her close crying into her hair

"I'm so sorry baby. I'm so sorry. I should never have sent you away. You're my baby. My little girl. I should never be forgiven for how I treated you"

"Will we play together soon?" She asks 

"... I promise." I smiled, giving her hand a kiss "We'll play. Very soon" 

"Okay, see you soon daddy"

"See you soon little princess" I told her and within seconds she disappeared.

I sighed and moved to my bed changing for the night and sitting on the mattress the moment I did I felt the shift on the other side of the bed and my eyes welled up. I couldn't wait another moment moving across the bed to hold her tighter then I had ever held her

"Hi"

"Hi" I cried into her sweet hair tied up with ribbons "I'm so happy to see you. I missed you so much y/n" 

"Ohh Thomas. I never really left" she reassured 

"You didn't?"

"Of course not, you know I could never leave you"

"I'd have sold my very soul to have had you on this earth with me… for just one more day"

"I know. And I would have sold my own for one more with you"

"You have not come to torcher me then? Remind me of my failure"

"You had your failings that I cannot deny Thomas. But I will not rub salt in old wounds" 

"You always where my spoonful of sugar" 

"Do you know… what time will call us?"

"No?"

"The king and his three M's the Matron, the mistress and the maiden. Liza, Mila and I" 

"Suits you all. But I suppose that's only from what time will remember"

"Time can be cruel. In its choice to remember" she says holding my hand "time has changed you"

"And not you. You look as beautiful as our wedding day." 

"Time is no change to me. I will be this way forever"

"That brings me peace. That even though I lost the chance to grow old with you, that I didn't have to watch you wither away. You can stay perfect forever"

"You worked hard enough to preserve my beauty as it was"

"I wanted to make sure. You deserved it to look like you. So everyone now and in a time far from now, just how beautiful you where" 

"You're too sweet"

"I wish, I could have spend my life with you. But every day I am thankful for every moment we had together"

"As am I" she smiled giving me a sweet kiss before she got up fixing her little dress as she always did 

"I know who else comes for me,"

"Oh Thomas. Knowone else is coming for you"

"No?"

"No." She says offering her hand

"I… I'm scared." I admit 

"Don't be my love. It's just a little walk. To the most beautiful place you'll ever see"

"I don't care where we go, so long as I'm with you" I smiled taking her hand 

"Come, or we'll miss the sunset" she smiled tugging me along with her leaving this darkness behind…

[myownprivatcidaho]

okay i'll bite what happened in govt class?

ALRIGHT so my govt professor is very. energetic and loves having an interactive class rather than a lecture so good for her on that.

basically she gave us a real life case in which a cop dug into the trash of a man named billy who was suspected of drug trade and presented it as evidence to the court. this raised the issue in court of whether or not this violated his fourth amendment right (law enforcement needs a specified written warrant before searching and/or seizing citizen property & and after a different case in the 60s, property illegally obtained cannot be presented before the court as evidence) because it was a gray space of whether or not it was his property.

we never did a mock trial before but in our classroom theres a courtroom setup at the back so 3 students put on honest to god robes and sat at the judge thing stand and then the classroom was split in two so thered be one side representing the state & arguing it was justified and a warrant wasnt needed vs the other representing billy and arguing that the 4th amendment was violated. so 3 more students from each side volunteered to represent whichever side they were assigned to. I was reluctant to volunteer cause. well who Wants that, but i could think up a couple good arguments in favor billy so i went ahead. (the prof gave out sheets that already had arguments that we could read off and mainly it would play out as a demonstration of how courts make decisions but the students COULD make their own arguments if they wanted)

so we sat down and basically went back and forth (like sitting up standing down saying shit like your honor etc etc) as to whether or not the cop who went dumpster diving violated the fourth amendment.

- basically one guy representing the state stood up and argued that it was no longer billys property so the cop didnt need a warrant

- i stood up and sounded confident for 2 seconds before my voice started shaking cause Anxiety but basically i began arguing that billy, as a taxpayer, was paying for the service of garbage disposal and therefore it was still a violation of the 4th amendment because it was still his property in that rite (even though 3 people volunteered for each side it quickly just ended up being one person arguing for an entire side so it was just me and the other guy).

- other guy stood up again and argued that since billy put the trash out to be collected (presumably out on a curb) it was no longer on his property, he was "getting rid of it," and therefore it wasnt his own. the people on the judge stand asked whose property it was then if billy "got rid of it" and state rep guy argued it was then private property of the garbage disposal service

- i stood up again and argued that it was still billys property and said the state rep guy needed to define "getting rid of [the trash]" because billy wasnt disowning it, it was his property that was to be sent off to a service that he as a taxpayer paid for - he payed for his residential property, cops would need a warrant to search his property. he payed for his possessions, cops would need a warrant to search his possessions. he payed for garbage disposal, cops need a warrant to search through trash that was being sent to said disposal. (prof said she liked this argument which was cool)

- after that tirade i was VERY shaky and then the judge (cause it was just one person representing the three on the judicial stand too lmao) asked if billy was supposedly innocent why did he feel the need to hide what was in his trash (important to note this question is NOT on topic and doesnt address the 4th amendment. in the irl case the people arguing no warrant was needed used sentiments to this effect & the fact that evidence WAS uncovered to argue that the cop was right to violate that right. more notably, this plays into the narrative that law enforcement can and should act based on perceived merit (seen often in copaganda - they follow gut instincts and perceptions and always always always just conveniently make the right call) and. we've all seen how that shit plays out in real life).

- i didnt SAY any of that though i knew it was getting off topic and into territory that would cause off-topic and intense arguing so i said "well thats really an individual case" and then i panicked too much and my mouth ran ahead of me and then "theres a LOT of reasons he might not want anyone to see that he could have TenFuckingCondomsInThereAtOnceAnd maybe thats all there is to it!"

- that. kinda shot down further questioning cause the judges and. everyone else was laughing, myself VERY much included and i couldnt even LOOK at the judges cause we were all honest to god laughing

- basically the judges ruled in favor of billy which the prof said happened the first time this entire week which was cool

- and yeah