#how can i face the turning of the days?
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i can’t trust in much, but when i play a song on repeat - at least i know what’s coming.
#a waltz in a flat major#i feel awful and like i shouldn’t and don’t deserve to be hurt and upset even though logically i should be able to#god why am i this way#what rough hands made me crude and turned to the sharp#it’s like i’m perpetually disgusted by just existing#and that’s so fucking sad#because there’s nothing to be disgusted of#i’m just me#but it’s like i’m intrinsically not enough#and i know this#and i’ve like spent god too much of my life contemplating it#but what now#what next#how can i face the turning of the days?#it’s like it all just knocks me down#and like i’m still trapped in that glass box#staring out at the world i want to be in knowing i can’t go#where birds sing and there isn’t my fear.#my claws clutch at a constant nothing#and still get caught in stubborn stitchings
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“hey. eyes up here.”
#uncropped version <3#so you guys can appreciate the DETAILS i put in the shoes and the hair and face#not to mention i’m kind of loving how the leather turned out…#so anyways i’m not going to shut up about this drawing and you will be seeing it consecutively for the next few days#maybe months#stranger things#eddie munson#my art
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Halloween dress-up, let's go!!!
Assignment: "Dress up as ghosts".
Status: Yes. They're ghosts. Just really different types of ghosts
#fanart#danny fenton/m'gann m'orzz#spearmint ship#i love them so much#yes M'gann is a White Lady#and before anyone hypothetically comes at me saying that White Lady should be all just white/have black hair but i have my reasons#in universe is: they decided to dress up “normal way” and it turned out that M'gann as a Martian was allergic to most make-up products#and in the end she threw some flour on her face and called it a day#and the meta reason is: I haven't drew Megan enough to believe she'd be recognizable with different hairstyle and without her color pallette#anyway#i love White Lady ghosts#like i can't even express how much i love them like aesthetically#and from the backstory standpoint#they're just neat imo#they're also really popular in Poland (my beloved motherland *patriotic sounding eagle noise because eagle is National Emblem of Poland :D*)#like you can trip on them#nearly every caslte has either White Lady or some cursed knight or *both*#and we have a lot of castles (though not a lot with original decor because fucking Red Army; sorry it makes me emotional)#but like to emphasise how many White Ladies we have#my uni's main building has one and it's not even a castle anymore#her story is really cool too#it involves Iron Maiden patricide and in some versions a lovestory#it also won't derail this post but I'd love to share it if someone is interested#halloween#happy halloween#dpxdc#dp x dc#dc x dp#wandixx arts#have a nice day dear stranger who got to this part
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Does leopard still have 3 lives in her final battle? Or was that changed?
Yep. I think she drowned her once, then Leopardstar lunges up refreshed, and she gets the upper paw on Mistyfoot with 2 lives to go.
(MAYBE tw gore, but I really did try to be tasteful about a head being smashed on a rock.)
On her back, splashing and thrashing furiously against Leopardstar's claws dunking her head under, Mistyfoot glimpses a wave breaking just over the tip of a stone-blue rock. Her only chance.
With a surge of power, her claws sink into her leader's golden shoulder and they tumble and roll to the right. Before the tyrant even realizes what's happening, she's yanked up, and then whipped backwards with a wet CRUNCH
And then again
And again
And again, until Mistyfoot can't even make out what's left of her leader anymore. All she can see is that it's a red, brown, and yellow blur, because her eyes burning with salty tears and her whole body is trembling.
She drops the corpse onto the stone and it slides into the water, lifelessly. After a moment it spasms aimlessly one last time, like an insect does after its head is bitten off, unlike the deliberate, agonized throes of Tigerstar suffering through his doomed lives. And then it's still.
There's only the tranquil sound of bubbling water, and Mistyfoot's frenzied panting. Her pounding heart makes it hard to hear either.
The blood is carried off by the shallow water in scarlet swirls, but the lake runs pale red as if it's washing it away. Some were aware of this prophecy, but Mistyfoot was not.
It isn't closure to her, or a fulfillment of divine decree. It's just blood that should be on her paws, slicked away by the complicit river. She wished it could feel like it's over, but she's smart enough to know the truth. Has been through enough terrible events like this to understand what comes next.
Her body will move foward. Her mind will need to consider her deputy. Her paw will come down on code-defying cats like Blackclaw and Greenflower. But her heart will stay here, next to the remains of Leopardstar, the same way another piece of it remains at Stonefur's side across space and time.
#Tw gore#Juuuust in case but I did try to stay tasteful#While also trying to write it as gut-wrenchingly violent as I imagine in my head#Because it's important that it haunts her#The kill wasn't pretty and clean. It was awful. She didn't want this. It wasn't heroic#'Why did you do this to me? Why did you make this so cruel?'#'Why was the last thing you ever did to me such a horrible command as a leader?'#'And why did I obey your orders until the bitter bitter end?'#'How could you turn my defiance into a new kind of cruel obediance? Did I not suffer ENOUGH for you?'#'And now there is no head to bury with your body. I am cursed with the last memory of your face. I alone will know how you looked at me'#'That the last expression on your face wasn't pain or confusion or realization.'#'It was all fury. For me.'#OF COURSE tho I will continue to make funny rock jokes until the day I die lmaoo#Duality of Bones#Hmm maybe when I get to this in BB!TNP I'll be quick and objective about it and save the Misty Emotions for like...#I miss how the field guides used to have stories told in 1st person.#It would be fun to have a BB!Mistystar Speaks#Because I do LOVE writing Misty's verbose and philosophical speeches.#As you can see from the tags lmao#BB!Mistystar#Better bones au
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ok tell me some basic gen 5 facts
victini was designed with the intention of appealing to female players
#also those bunny apple snack thingies#i only had this one on my mind because i was thinking about it the other day but i can have facts sometimes 🔗💥🔗#<- thats supposed to be the guy breaking his chains image#asks#vgpony-mk2#also no matter how you turn the klink lines body it always appears to have a face. i learned this one today !#frillish wasnt supposed to be a ghost type (love to share that one)#cofagrigus and runerigus share...idk base stats except for attack and somthing else those two are inverted ?? something like that#i dont pay attention to stat details so i dont remember that one as well#also they EAT PEOPLE*. thats just a dex entry but i like to share that tidbit. *theyre said to encase people so its probably not really#eating but like... ur most like not surviving so you might as well say they eat ppl#sorry another cofagrigus one. theyre bipedal and quadrapedal. idk if theres a word that means u do both but they do both.
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IMAGINE. working at ur stupid uhhh job or whatever. pulling into your drive way and ready to work on some crazy project in your garage. opening the door to the most unfamiliar silence. did your wife and kid leave for something? could you imagine knocking on your kids door, hardly getting an answer, and opening it to find the splattered remains of your wife across his room your child is scared! hes hardly consolable, in a state of shock and terror. you are too, but youre the adult here. you need to take charge. you need to protect him. you need to do something. you need to do something.
#cw gore#jrwi fanart#jrwi show#jrwi prime defenders#jrwi pd spoilers#ashe winters#LOOOORRRD HELP ME THIS IS A YEAR OLD AND I HAAAATE LOOKIN AT IIITTTT ALL I CAN SEE ARE MY MISTAAAKESSS RRAAGHHHGGG ITS FINE THOUGH#ITS FIIIINE ITS ALL FIIIIIIINE!! IM HARSHER ON MY ART THAN ANYONE ELSE ITS FIIIIIINE IIITTSFFIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIIINEEEE#ANWYAY SO I THINK ALOT ABOUT THE FACT HE KILLED HIS MOM. FUUUUCKED UP. POOR GUY.. i wish i could learn more about what that day was like#the lil scenario wrote is my own silly little headcanon. but what really happened on that day? was mark there? or did he come home to it?#how violent was it really? was ashe awake the whole time? does he remember exactly how he killed her? does he remember?#who was mrs winters? what was she like? i like to think she was the one that gave ashe the book. taught him what she could before. yknow.#did ashe or mark try to destroy it afterwards? i could imagine mark throwing it into a fire. only for it to reappear with ashe#maybe ashe couldnt destroy it but i could imagine him hiding it. hiding away from it. and yet when we find him he holds it so close#its the only thing he can do! no super powers or anything. this was it. why would he ever throw away the only thing hes good at?#AND GOOD GOD MARK... TURNING TO MERCENARY WORK OVER IT ALL... SELLING HIS SOUL TO A LAbortory that changed him in immense ways#when did it get bad enough for him to start covering his face? what was ashe thinking? he knew his dad was up to something but what?#maRK HAS SUUUCH A CRAZY KILL COUNT TOO. I THINK THE HIGHEST IN THE SERIES IF WE'RE NOT LOOKIN AT THE GODS OR WATEV#MASS MURDER. MAN HAS COMMITTED MASS MURDER AND BROKE OUT OF SUPER VILLAIN PRISON WITH A PEN. MAN BUILDS IRON MAN SUITS IN HIS BASEMENT#OKay okay enough of my ramblin okayokay i just REALLY LOVE THIS SSHHOOOOWWW DUUUDEE EEUUGHTHTHHRHGHGH I LOVE THE WINTERS FAMILY...
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Chainsaw Man Chapter 74 with Excerpts from Mystic by Sylvia Plath
“The air is a mill of hooks —
Questions without answer
…
I remember
The dead smell of sun…
Once you have seen God, what is the remedy?
Once one has been seized up…
…
Used utterly…
What is the remedy?
…
#I decided to try and take advantage of shitty comic day but this turned out a lot better than I thought it would! happy with it :-)#I’ve been wanting to make a comic about Angel with Mystic for so long#I have so many thoughts about the whole poem — both as it relates to religion and how it can be applied to Angel’s story#might eventually make a part 2 bc the later stanzas about finding Christ in the face of rodents? babygirl t’was MADE for Angel!!!#(neither I nor Angel are religious imo but I grew up in it and Angel represents biblical figures so I think the language is mad fitting!)#csm#csm fanart#csm spoilers#csm part 1#csm chapter 74#csm ch 74#csm comic#csm angel devil#csm angel#csm aki#csm makima#(accidentally wrote ‘you’ instead of ‘one’ in the 3rd panel augh)
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This wip has been sitting around for a while bit I felt like dropping it bc I was thinking about them being cozy ;; (feat. dialogue I forgot to post elsewhere so it's a special treat lol)
#LoK#Baatar Jr.#Kuvira#WIP#[ I'm sorry this is about as finished as most art gets now a days sobs#but I at the very least like how this is turning out#especially Kuvira I think this is one of my best drawings of her so far#I'm always finding ways to partially obscure her face when I can bc she's so touch for me to draw#but oughh i just love them being all snuggly and comfy ;;;;;#I'm so pleased with Kuv's expression like sobs that's her man she lov him so much ]#Neon Ocean Art
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Jane and Guildford on Would I Lie To You (with Rob Brydon) - My Lady Jane
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basically the thought process is: rob brydon plays lord dudley aka guildford's dad in mlj. he also hosts wilty. so what if lord dudley threw his son on a game show?? and jane is there :)
#janeford#jane grey#guildford dudley#jane x guildford#my lady jane#wilty#would I lie to you#rob brydon#edward bluemel#emily bader#my lady jane 1x01#janefordedit#myladyjaneedit#janefordarchive#myladyjanecentral#mljedit#videos in the palace#edits in the palace#how niche can I go haha#the mlj x wilty crossover that nobody asked for haha#oh also this is the sam campbell episode bc it is the only wilty episode I've seen haha#I just love guildford's confuzzled face like am I on a prank show??#so what if lord dudley put guildford as a contestant on wilty#and jane is a guest on the this is my segment#and guildford and jane are VERY confused why they are seeing each other again#alternatively dudley decided to turn the wedding into a gameshow haha#context for wilty fans: these two have an arranged marriage (but don't know each other) and meet at a tavern the night before their wedding#there is an instant connection but they are separated until the next day where they see each other again at their own wedding#and only then do they realize that they're marrying the attractive stranger that they met just the night before haha#Youtube
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Crazy how the people accusing Palestinians of being scammers do fucking nothing else to help them! It's almost as if they're just looking for an excuse to be racist and ignore people suffering in a genocide :O
#and for the record. even if they are scams (which i do not believe)#id much rather be fooled by a scam than turn my back on someone in need#i have donated to some. not all im not rich. but the least i can do is share them#but even if you do have doubts the easiest fucking thing you can do is delete the ask#reporting accounts and making posts and reblogging shit about how it MUST be a scam (with most your information incorrect and racist)#youre going out of your way to hurt someone! whos likely in Palestine! fearing for their lives every fucking day!#god it makes me so angry!! who tf do you think you are?!#JUST DELETE THE ASK IF YOU DONT TRUST IT. GOD DAMN#lets face it. even if they werent asking for help on tumblr youd still find a way to dehumanise and attack them#btw im saying ''you'' but afaik none of my followers or mutuals are doing or saying this#i just saw reblogs on that badjokesbyjeff post and it got me so angry i had to rant
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missing my second favourite revolutionary spy played by burn gorman tonight 🇬🇧
#oh cape!edmund we're really in it now 🖤#burn gorman#my gifs#major hewlett#edmund hewlett#edmund my dearest 🔭#my beloved starboy 🌌#i think queue and i are gonna end up bloody#man i need a tag for burn now fuck#the burn collection#turn#turn amc#turn washington's spies#turn: washington's spies#I miss your face sir#;_;#another brown eyed boy ruining my life#sorry edmund but harvey remains my number one#tis very very close though; you would have liked him too#he was noble and heroic in the way that only the best kinds of people can truly be#...how cracky is a ship if both characters are played by the same actor but are set in completely different mediums?#shut up ace#i am Quite Fatigued#I've had this set saved for a rainy day and now he is finally being set free#fly my beloved perseus fly!
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do you ever think about the pure grief that hits the curtis brothers when they see something that reminds them of their parents cause i sure do
#idk i’ve been thinking a lot about grief lately#my grandfather turned 90 today and we wrote him letters about our favorite memories with him#and i’m now facing the fact that one day he will be gone#and all i can imagine is the curtis brothers falling into those memories#not sure how to cope with the fact they can’t live those experiences again
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"We're old moms, we can't wait to stop breastfeeding so we can get [very excited, shrill even] botooooox!!!"
We are never making it out of the patriarchy.
#every time i open instagram i see videos promoting botox for the moment you turn 20 and face lifts and plastic surgery#and skincare regimens that are not care at all but just fifty products to torture your skin (and spend money!!)#the ties between the patriarchy and capitalism that support one another are terrifying.#but not even that . i feel like i'm going insane#how did we in this day and age normalise so much of this shit#what happened to feminism... why am i seeing a man who works as a plastic surgeon#talking about ''when a client walks in and i know EXACTLY what she needs to change so i am able to get her to#sign up for four more procedures asides from the one she came here for ^_^'' i'm going to kill you.#beat you with rocks. do you guys know botox is a bacteria? do you guys know about botulism?#you throw away a can of food because it's slightly dented so you don't die from botulism#but you inject it straight into your forehead because someone told you signs you#lived a long life full of expressing your emotions guilt-free was what made you ugly#the way i see influencers who will call themselves feminists talk about those wrinkle-free straws... don't sleep on your side#don't breathe wrong don't crease your eyebrows don't smile don't cry don't drink from straws#you're all fucking insane. and wrinkles are caused by your skin losing elasticity. you will STILL have wrinkles#if you live long enough that is (<- can you see why it's a blessing?)
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...
#im at such a weird point in my life. trying to choose between a phd and a doomed life as an academic and like just not doing that.#its crazy how not terrible i feel when im not in school. just give me tasks to do and i will do them. dont let me think.#but then im just avoiding my responsibilities. i dunno. i just feel like i would be happier with a structured job that ends when the day#is over. which is y my dad thinks i should get a government job. one of my former lab mates got a government job and he's settling into#spending the rest of his life out in Colorado. which is so weird. i dont kno how long ill be in the place im in now. will it b 4 more years?#or will it be only a few months? will i go back to school in the fall? its looking like yes bc i dont have a job lined up. but maybe ill#keep applying and dip out. let my dreams die in favor of balance and sanity. maybe some things arent meant to be.#its just so gutting. i was talking to my coworker this week. saying that im interested in so many things. i could have studied anything else#and traveled a completely different path. and a guy across the room was like: its never too late. but it feels like its too late. too late#to spend another impossible amount of money on getting a different degree. restarting on a second masters project. im almost 30.#im supposed to b saving money so that i can not work forever. but i cant do that if im just a student forever. so maybe i should just get a#job. god. but theres so much i still want to learn. and im in the perfect program for everything i thought i wanted. im in the perfect place#but everything's falling to pieces. whatever. i. just tired bc im on day 5 of work and have to go in for a day 6.#doing something i havent done before all day. but after than im going home for a week. so ill have lots to contemplate in the airport.#this is not how i thought things would turn out. but im glad im spending the summer working where i am. im learning lots on a human to human#level. and no one bleieves im 27 bc i apparently have a bby face lol. nope im 11 yrs older than u my 16yo coworker#unrelated
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I did not manage to write today, but I managed to take a short walk, do laundry, pay some bills I've been sitting on for a while, and cook dinner! So overall executive functioning A- today.
#personal#all hail the despair salad#the rest of my day was spent figuring out how I would build an urban druid in pf 1e#and the answer turned out to be take a 1 level dip in unmonk#have higher than average cha#and get a hat of disguise for low levels until you get a thousand faces so you can still execute on the basic character concept
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the amount of effort that goes into figuring out what to cook and eat every day is RIDICULOUS. i used to think people were so weird and boring for eating the same thing every single day but it truly does make life so much easier
#and also it's nice to know exactly what your food is going to taste like before you eat it#like when i get unfamiliar takeout. half the time i'm like. oh.#i'm going to have to eat all of this. or be judged.#so i just do my best to suppress my gag reflex and Get Through It and then it makes me sick so what was even the point#i think my parents spoiled me. and the most annoying thing is they're significantly better at cooking now than when i was a child#so when i go over i eat three delicious home cooked meals + snacks and they're all different and amazingggg#and then i come back to texas and i am like. googling 'how to feed myself healthy vegetarian'#because I do NOT have the time or money or energy to cook three beautiful delicious meals Just For Me#i think this would be easier with a partner#this whole week i bought a fuckton of mediterranean groceries and i have been making and eating food!!#mediterranean is close enough to indian that i like it well enough#unfortunately for me. i am def going to have to learn how to cook indian food to get through life. because i cannot fucking eat american#i don't know HOW you guys do it i'm so spoiled#i'm assuming meat is this really amazing wonderful thing that just adds flavor to everything#(it is physically repulsive to me and the couple times ive accidentally tasted it it's bleh so i refuse to partake)#i think it's an acquired taste but it magically makes ur food better. that is my understanding of how meat works#cause american vegetarian food is the saddest fucking thing i've ever tasted#i still think about my coworker i was talking to about my food issues and he was like. 'do u understand that you have been given a gift#by having constant access to tasty food your entire life. i ate unseasoned green beans every day of my childhood. learn how to fucking cook#indian food already.' truly a horrific thing to hear. but i'm calling my parents more and going HOW TO COOK VEGETABLE? BEAN? PLEASE HELP??#and by god i am not going to turn into my coworker.#anyways we start with baby steps. lentils and rice it is next week .-. going to the indian store to buy pickles to make it more tolerable#and i have my cabinet full of spices already at least#i wish i was less pickyyy#sometimes lalita cooks indian food for me and i'm like wow. i love and appreciate u for feeding me. but this sure is south indian food#i don't understand How they use spices. it feels like they toss as much of as many bottles as they can into every dish#and it's. the taste is just OW OW OW and nothing else. where's the nuance. the flavor.#and i like it when things are spicy!! i can even eat things where the flavor is just Hot. but not when she cooks it.#she will like watch my face when i take a bite and then go 'if you don't like it i'm throwing away all my pots and running away'#which. honestly a fair reaction. the problem is that i am incapable of lying
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