#horse apple cookie

[cosmicwhoreo]

So I made them Salty Shark Crew ocs!

And I love them so so much! Aaaaaaand I also kept these two freaks-

because they were too fun a duo to give up to somebody else

[ryssbelle]

No link intober for today, got busy, so I'll just have to do two prompts for day 9 XD

[nukenai]

I'm permanently embarrassed by being caught up in the "BLM roundups are so cruel and mustangs are traumatized by it, they should be free forever" propaganda bullshit, but then I see how many people are still falling for it and I feel a little better. These highly funded "rescues" like Skydog Sanctuary are extremely adept at manipulating people and they know what they're doing.

Sad animal stories already tug at peoples' heartstrings, so why NOT make shit up about horses caring about "family" and how all BLM workers love abusing animals or whatever. When you already have people in your hands, they believe whatever you tell them.

The only thing that broke me out of it all was talking to people who actually have and train mustangs. I started wavering after the nonstop Holocaust comparisons, but it's amazing what real perspective can do.

But so many people would rather believe that Spirit was a documentary and all horses have an internal Matt Damon voiceover talking about missing home and their mom. It's easier than the truth which is "this is a complicated problem that requires complicated solutions". Treating mustangs as living breathing creatures worthy of respect and dignity, while recognizing that they're a harmful invasive species that needs to be controlled, are not mutually exclusive.

My head is still spinning from that anon the other day. Came right up to someone whose grandparents were refugees after WW2 and said "horse roundups and holding pens are just like Nazi prison camps". Unfuckingbelievable.

[kcrossvine-art]

hi friends! :D y'all voted and fought neck and neck for this SO- heres the first entry into our little cooking journey of J. R. R. Tolkeins fictional food for his fictional little guys he puts in fictional turmoils for our enjoyment and awe!

 Before we get started i wanna say i owe my heart to all the LotR fans who upkeep the wiki, debate the cannon, and create their own versions of the foods mentioned. Both because of my love for people who LOVE (passionate people)(passion about anything) and because my own knowledge of this series is a little dusty. I've never seen the movies but I did read the books growing up. I'll be learning and remembering things from a fairly newbie standpoint, so no worries if you yourself arent familiar with the series! (and if you are familiar, hopefully youll forgive me!)

We will be making Lembas ('waybread') today! If you've made your own version of this please feel free to share it, similarly if you have any ideas for what we make next!

(As always you can find the cooking instructions and full ingredient list under the break-)

MY NAMES CROSS NOW LETS COOK LIKE ANIMALS

SO, “what goes in to Lembas?” YOU MIGHT ASKWell so the funny thing is we kinda dont know. At least not entirely? The elves are dicks like that. But heres what we'll be using in ours-

Butter

Self-rising flour

Granulated Sugar

Raisins

A small dried fruit of your choosing

Almonds OR Pecans

EGG

Whole Milk

Heavy Cream

And if you would like for dipping-

Blackberry jam

To the extent i understand this is kinda like hardtack from the bri'ish military, but a fantastical version of it that actually tastes really good. Hardtack was a military provision with the texture of a brick that took a long time to spoil and could be easily carried with soldiers. So the texture we're going for is super dense, packed full with nuts and fruits (haha just lik-), but perhaps not that dense. We want something closer to a dog biscuit than actual tack.

I remembered something about corn being mentioned, thankfully the wiki clarified that no actually the british just referred to any grain as corn back in the day. Thank Fuck! Although I would like to try a version of this using masa in the future.

AND, “what does Lembas taste like?” YOU MIGHT ASK

Took a few tries but eventually got it perfectly chewy and dense

The raisins cook-in like little beads of flavortown sweetness

Cant speak for other fruits but for dried apple it softened up nicely, kinda matching the raisins in the end

Im a big pecan slut, pecans fuck on anything especially here. Crumble them on top after you coat the dough with the egg-mixture for some visual appeal

Somewhat flakey outside

The jam was my idea, it was nice but might be too sweet for some tastes

Would pair very well with a kiwi flavored drink

Or mead

I can see why this would a travelling provision. Its both sugary (a good thing when expending energy) and filling (also a good thing when youre travelling) while not being overwhelming with flavor (if youre prone to motion sickness. Horse sickness? Do get motion sickness on horses?)

Its like how if you're going hiking you want a good mix of sugars and salts, to balance your intake of water.

. If you wanna make it like the illustrations or the movie, use a cookie cutter for either triangles or squares . If you don't have a cookie cutter, an apple cutter also works ¯\_(ツ)_/¯ . try to keep the board you'll roll the dough out onto chilled before you use it, it seems better for the texture of the food though i dont entirely know why

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So from beginning to end, it took about an hour and half for the first attempt. Down to about 40 minutes for the second attempt. These are a real simple recipe because its not like a croissant where the margin for error is nonexistent. Middle-earth be damned my boy can work a grill.

I'd recommend storing in a tubberware container, but if you're deadset on using leaves please rinse and dry them first, and wrap the bread in either wax paper or saran wrap underneath. We dont have mallorn leaves in real life (as far as we know) but most salad greens should work, or as Marie Porter says (linked in the reblogs!) a banana leaf.

I really enjoyed the process of making this recipe, itd be really easy to batch-bake these en masse, and the process of eating said recipe. Like all jokes aside, i think this would be a great substitute for trailmix. Its not going to get smushed and even if it breaks a bit it wont affect the taste. It wont keep you fed for a whole day but pair it with some pickles or a salty snack and yeah itll keep your motor running.

I give this recipe a solid 10/10 (with 1 being food that makes one physically sick and 10 being food that gives one a lust for life again.) Let me know if you think I got something wrong, or if you ran into issues with the recipe. We're off to a strong start, lads!

🐁 ORIGINAL RESIPPY TEXT BELOW 🐁

Ingredients:

6 TBSP butter, chilled

2 cups self-rising flour

1 TBSP granulated sugar

½ cup raisins

½ other dried fruit (strawberry slices, oranges, etc.), chopped

Handful of almonds or pecans, chopped

1 egg, well beaten

½ cup whole milk

4 TBSP heavy cream

Method:

Preheat your oven to 400 f.

Cut the butter into slivers/small pieces. With your hands, combine the butter into the flour in a mixing bowl until the mixture resembles coarse sand.

Chop your dried nuts and dried fruit until it feels right.

Mix in the sugar, raisins, nut, and dried fruit of your choosing

In a seperate bowl, beat the egg until combined, and then mix in the milk until combined. Keep a bit of this mixture to brush the tops of the bread.

Stir while adding the egg/milk mixture and the heavy cream into the flour. Mix just until combined into a soft dough.

Knead the dough until firm on a floured surface.

Roll into a half inch thickness and cut with a square or leaf shaped cookie cutter. (...or in my case, an apple corer).

Place on a lightly greased baking sheet, with about an inch of space between each piece. Brush the tops of the lembas with some of the mixture you saved earlier.

Bake for about 15-20 minutes, or until it turns a soft gold and the inside is chewy.

[museofthepyre]

Hi! I always love your analysis and thoughts on chnt, so i wanted to ask if you have any one the "fruit fly that died by starvation/we only see sydney eating when elijah feeds him" parallels. I have some of my own, but frankly they're much too scrambled at the moment to make any sense. Have a good day!

THANK YOUUU IM SO GLAD YOU BROUGHT THIS TO MY ATTENTION BECAUSE OHHHH OMGOMG… you are onto something… okok I’m gonna rope Adam and the apple incident™️ into this too, since I think it’s the only other time we see Sydney eat anything…

If we’re analyzing this through the “hunger/ food as a metaphor for love” lens and trying to find meaning in these specific instances…

Jedidiah offers Sydney no food, they never even eat together anymore, Sydney says he misses it… the fruit fly dies of starvation, empty and alone… Jedidiah simply never thought to feed it. He loved it. He thought that was enough.

Elijah offers Sydney butter cookies, something much sweeter than what he’s used to— both the gesture itself, and the food in question. They sit across a table and have breakfast together while Elijah rambles on about some very concerning thoughts and behaviours— interspersed with declarations of love, compliments, etc... It’s sugar coating, its sweet-talking, sweetening the deal so that Sydney’s takeaway from the interaction is a conflicting blur of “nice, new & sweet” and “creepy, overwhelming & confusing”. He knows Sydney will come back, because Elijah is the only one feeding him, and the sweetness masks the taste of the poison!

And then ADAM!!! Adam offers Sydney an apple with a centipede hidden inside… Adam presents himself as a therapist, as a friend who cares, who’s there to help! He offers Sydney food, challenging Sydney’s refusal with the line “you’re always hungry!”… but it’s a Trojan Horse type situation. He has harmful intentions hidden beneath the surface, but you’ll only realize that once you’ve already bit off more than you can chew!!! What was offered to you as a nice and shiny apple ends up containing a centipede that you’re now forced to chew through (centipedes, in my opinion, symbolize danger/ threat or some similar concept in CHNT).

Somewhat tangential at the end here but what do yall think about Adam being an auto-cannibal through this perspective because I have many thoughts…

[pandorasworkshop]

🐇Welcome to Wonderland- Pick a Card

Who from Alice in wonderland do you embody? And what's something good about you.

Pandorasworkshop

Pile 1 Pile 2 Pile 3

Pile 1

Cards: the muses, the trout and lilly of the valley, the hare, three of cups and the sun

Character: white rabbit, door mouse, the march hare

Reading: You know how to have fun but I feel as if there is a little bit of social anxiety. May be a bit sleepy and have a pure heart. You genuinely mean well for your friends and are a go with the flow type of person. Creative talents and self expression is important to you. You are a good learner and work hard you should slow down sometimes when you feel stressed. I feel like you may be pretty like a bunny. With the sun card people view you as honest and bright. You may have a bit of a sweet tooth or have a signature drink you always drink. With the hare card I feel like you are a messenger and may warn people about things they need to know. You are smart and know how to get yourself out of a sticky situation. Rewrite any doubts about yourself.

Signs: 113, white rabbits or any rabbits for that matter, the feeling you have been forgetting something, card games, tweed fabric, academic style, vampire movies, peonies and white roses, the chess cookies that are square.

Pile 2

Cards: the storyteller, the sailor, coyote and datura, the moth and eucalyptus, the fool and six of cups

Character: Cheshire cat, the caterpillar, and Alice

Reading: You are a great storyteller and may get into a bit of mischief. You have a lot of wisdom that comes from living life and feel like people don't give you enough credit for that. You may be a little bit of a rebel but you know how to throw a party and get into fun. You may smoke or drink and if you don't you may be an avid tea drinker. You always know something before others do and have keen sixth sense and great observations skills. You may be neurodivergent or think a little differently about life than others. You have a child-like sense of humor and find things to laugh at. Joyous to be around. You are always down for something new and consistency may be a problem for you. You like to experiment in your tastes whether it's style, food and anything in between. You like to go to new places and experience life for all the nice things it has. You are curious about life and like to learn new things. Maybe school wasn't for you.

Signs: 444, blue butterfly, cats, fur coats, swords, beautiful crystals, responsibilities, feeling bored, caviar or any other types of fancy fish, silver jewelry, mushrooms.

Pile 3

Cards: the tailor, the herald, the horse and blue bells, beaver and birch, king of cups, queen of wands, ten of wands

Characters: mad hatter and queen of hearts

Reading: You are a hard worker and leader. Both of these characters lead. You may feel burnt out and need to rest. You are a person of many talents and skills. You are humble about yourself and may be a bit of a queen bee unknowingly. You have great fashion sense and are responsible. You may have struggled with depression. You are a survivor and have a lot of strength in you. Many people would say you feel like home and you are good at comforting your friends. No one knows what your next move is and you keep people on your toes. You'll always land on your feet like a cat. People feel safe around you and you have a lot of advice to share. I feel like you need to rest. You deserve a proper vacation or spa day. Whatever will make you happiest. Remember you come first.

Signs: 1111, red wine, apples, learning to accept help, those warm knitted blankets, satin, the color red, community, dahlias, the game Alice madness returns, violin and piano, spirited away.

[greenwitchcrafts]

December 2023 witch guide

Full moon: December 26th

New moon: December 12th

Sabbats: Yule December 21st-January 1st

December Cold Moon

Known as: Drift Clearing Moon, Frost Exploding Tree Moon, Moon of the Popping Trees, Hoar Frost Moon, Snow Moon, Winter, Aerra Geola, Maker Moon, Heilagmanoth, Long Night's Moon, Oak Moon, Wintermonat, Moon of the Long Night, Little Spirit Moon, Wolf Moon & When the Deer Shed Their Antlers Moon

Element: Fire

Zodiac: Sagittarius & Capricorn

Nature spirits: Snow, Storm, & Winter Tree faeries

Deities: Athena, Fates, Hades, Hathor, Hecate, Ixchel, Minerva, Neith, Norns, Osiris & Persephone

Animals: Bear, deer, horse & mouse

Birds: Robin, rook & snowy owl

Trees: Fir, Holly & Pine

Herbs: Bay, cedar, chamomile, cinnamon, English ivy, evergreen, fir, frankincense, holly, mistletoe, myrrh, pine & sage

Flowers: Christmas catus, holly & poinsettia

Scents: Cedar, cinnamon, frankincense, ginger, lilac, myrrh, nutmeg, patchouli, pine, rose geranium, rosemary, saffron, violet & wintergreen

Stones: Bloodstone, blue topaz, cat's eye, garnet, jacinth, obsidian, peridot, turquoise, zircon, ruby & serpentine

Colors: Black, blood red, gold, green, red, silver, black & white

Energy: Alchemy, darkness, endurance, death & re-birth, higher education, publications, reaching out to others, religion, spiritual paths, travel & truth

Today, December’s full Moon is most commonly known as the Cold Moon—a Mohawk name that conveys the frigid conditions of this time of year, when cold weather truly begins to grip us.

This full Moon has also been called the Long Night Moon (Mohican), as it rises during the “longest” nights of the year, near the December winter solstice. This name is doubly fitting because December’s full Moon shines above the horizon for a more extended period than most full Moons.

In Europe, ancient pagans called the December full Moon the “Moon Before Yule,” in honor of the Yuletide festival celebrating the return of the sun heralded by winter solstice.

Yule

Also known as: Alban, Arthan & Winter Solstice

Season: Winter

Symbols: Baskets of clove studded fruit, Christmas catus,  decorated evergreen trees, evergreen boughs, gifts, gold pillar candles, hung mistletoe, poinsettias, wreaths & Yule logs/small Yule log with three candles

Colors: Gold, green, orange, red, silver, white &yellow

Oils/incense: Bayberry, cedar, cinnamon, frankincense. Myrrh & pine

Animals: Bear, boar, deer (stag), pig, squirrel & tiger

Birds: Eagle, goose, kingfisher, lapwing, owl robin & wren

Stones: Bloodstone, garnet, ruby, alexandrite, blue topaz,  cat's eye, citrine, clear quartz, diamond, emerald, green tourmaline, jet, kunzite & pearl

Foods: Caraway cakes, cookies, eggnog, fruits, ginger tea, nuts, pork, spiced cider, turkey, wassail & lamb's wool (ale,  sugar, nutmeg & roasted apples)

Herbs/plants: Bay, bayberry, birch, blessed thistle, cedar, chestnut, cinnamon, evergreens, fir, frankincense, ginger, holly, ivy, juniper, mistletoe, moss, myrrh, oak, pine, rosemary, sage, valerian & yellow cedar

Flowers: Chamomile, poinsettia & yarrow

Goddesses: Alcyone, Aphrodite, Ameratasu, Bona Dea, Brighid, Cailleach Bheur, Demeter, Diana, Fortuna, Frau Holle, Frau Perchta, Frigga, Gaia, Hel, Great Mother, Idunn, Isis, Ishtar, Kolyada, La Befana, Maat & Tiamat

Gods: Apollo, Attis, Balder, Bragi, Dionysus, Divine Child, Green Man, Helios, Holly King, Horned one, Horus, Janus, Lord of Misrule, Lugh, Mabon, Marduk, Mithras, Odin, Ra, Saturn & Surya

Issues Intentions & Powers: Darkness, divination, light, messages/omens, purification, rebirth/renewal & transformation

Spellwork: Earth magick, happiness, harmony, love & peace

Activities:

• Set up & decorate a Yule altar

• Clean, organize & cleanse before decorating your home

• Make witch's balls to hang on your tree (protective & pretty!)

• Decorate & bless & Yule tree

• Stay awake until dawn to observe the cycles of nature

• Give gifts tomyour family & friends

• Donate your time or helpful items to charity

• Go caroling

• Hang mistletoe in your doorways

• Make Wassail

• Prepare a Yule Log

• Host a Yule feast

• Craft your own decorative wreath

• Decorate your house with Yule colored candles

• Welcome the Sun

• Go on nature walks & leave offerings to nature

• Meditate & reflect on the passing year

“Yule” comes from Old English geol, which shares a history with the equivalent word from Old Norse, jól. Both these words referred to a midwinter festival centered around the winter solstice, which traditionally marked the halfway point of the winter season. After the solstice—the shortest day of the year—the days again begin to grow longer, so it’s thought that Yule was a celebration of the re-appearance of the Sun &the fertile land’s rebirth. 

The celebration of Yule is one of the oldest winter celebrations in the world. Ancient people were hunters & spent most of their time outdoors. The seasons & weather played a significant part in their lives. The customs and traditions associated with it vary widely.

Scholars have connected the original celebrations of Yule to the Wild Hunt, the god Odin, and the heathen Anglo-Saxon Mōdraniht ("Mothers' Night")

Some believe it marks the rebirth of the Sun (the God) from the Earth (the Goddess) & the cold days of winter will soon begin to wane. The Goddess is seen in her virgin Maiden aspect

In towns and cities throughout Sweden during the Christmas season, large goats are constructed out of straw. It is thought that the tradition originated in ancient times, perhaps as a tribute to the god Thor, who was said to ride in a chariot pulled by goats. In Sweden the goat came to be associated with the Christmas celebration, and the Yule goat is now considered by many to be a companion or counterpart to Santa Claus.

Related festivals:

Christmas- An annual festival commemorating the birth of Jesus Christ as the son of God, primarily observed on December 25th

Hanukkah- A Jewish festival commemorating the recovery of Jerusalem & subsequent rededication of the Second Temple at the beginning of the Maccabean Revolt against the Seleucid Empire in the 2nd century BCE.

Hanukkah is observed for eight nights & days, starting on the 25th day of Kislev according to the Hebrew calendar, which may occur at any time from late November to late December in the Gregorian calendar. The festival is observed by lighting the candles of a candelabrum with nine branches, commonly called a menorah or hanukkiah. 

Kwanzaa- An annual celebration of African-American culture from December 26 to January 1st, culminating in a communal feast called Karamu, usually on the sixth day. It was created by activist Maulana Karenga, based on African harvest festival traditions from various parts of West & Southeast Africa. Kwanzaa was first celebrated in 1966. 

A Kwanzaa ceremony may include drumming and musical selections, libations, a reading of the African Pledge & the Principles of Blackness, reflection on the Pan-African colors, a discussion of the African principle of the day or a chapter in African history, a candle-lighting ritual, artistic performance & finally, a feast of faith (Karamu Ya Imani).

Saturnalia-

is an ancient Roman festival and holiday in honour of the god Saturn, held on 17 December of the Julian calendar & later expanded with festivities through to 23 December. The holiday was celebrated with a sacrifice at the Temple of Saturn, in the Roman Forum & a public banquet, followed by private gift-giving, continual partying & a carnival atmosphere that overturned Roman social norms: gambling was permitted & masters provided table service for their slaves as it was seen as a time of liberty for both slaves and freedmen alike.

 A common custom was the election of a "King of the Saturnalia", who gave orders to people, which were followed & presided over the merrymaking. The gifts exchanged were usually gag gifts or small figurines made of wax or pottery known as sigillaria. The poet Catullus called it "the best of days".

Other celebrations:

Feast of Epona-

Eponalia is the feast day of Gaulish Goddess Epona, the Divine Mare & in the time of the Roman Empire it was celebrated on December 18th.

Epona is known to be one of a very few Gaulish deities whose names were spread to the rest of the Roman Empire. This seems to have happened because Roman cavalry units stationed in Gaul followed Her & adopted her as their Patroness. This may have started because many of the cavalry troops were conscripted from Gaul as they were superb horsemen. From Gaul the Romans took Epona with them including to Rome where She was given her own feast day on the 18 December. They worshipped her as Epona Augusta or Epona Regina & invoked her on behalf of the Emperor. She even had a shrine in the barracks of the Imperial Bodyguard.

Hunting of the Wren-

A traditional custom carried out on the Isle of Man on the 26 December, St. Stephen's Day. It consists of groups of people going around villages and towns singing and dancing a traditional song and dance around a decorated wren pole.

The earliest and most common folklore story accounting for the origin of hunt the wren tells of a fairy/enchantress/witch whose beauty lures the men of the Isle of Man to harm, for which she is chased and is changed into the form of a wren. It is therefore in punishment for her actions that the wren is hunted on St. Stephen's Day

Sources:

Farmersalmanac.com

Llewellyn's Complete Book of Correspondences by Sandra Kines

A Witch's Book of Correspondences by Viktorija Briggs

Llewellyn's 2023 magical almanac: practical magic for everyday living

Wikipedia

Encyclopedia Britannica

[czennieszn]

the magic of christmastime | l. castellan ❆

part 1: s(mitten) for you, luke castellan

child of aphrodite reader (Y/N) x luke castellan (fluff, a bit of angst, some anxiety)

It's Christmastime, the season of magic, miracles, and snow in the city. Celebrating their first Christmas together as a couple, Luke and Y/N are eager to participate in Christmas traditions. And what better way to get in Christmas spirit than going shopping in the Big Red Apple, the splendid New York City. There is only one problem, getting the permission of Chiron and Mr. D.

w.c. 2.5K (let me know if you would fancy a part 2!

______________________________________________________________

I love Christmastime. From the flurry of people that crowd the malls of New York City, to the actual flurries of soft white snow that encase the concrete, making the Big Apple look like a giant snow globe, it's safe to say that Christmastime sparked a little bit of magic in you. Every year after Thanksgiving, a silent countdown would begin; the countdown until Christmas. Thirty days. Twenty-nine days. Twenty-eight days. Time didn't move any slower. But during these thirty days, the Christmas traditions got you through the month.

Baking and decorating Christmas cookies, wearing matching sweaters, drinking hot cocoa, and watching Christmas movies on your old DVD player, were things that you were anticipating doing this Christmas. Except, this Christmas would be different. It would be a little bit more magical, because this Christmas, you had the golden-eyed curly-haired Hermes boy with a crooked smile to spend it with. And you were delighted.

"Luke..." you gently nudged your boyfriend, teasing him with a smile. He was lying on your bed with his hands stretched out, your monthly subscription to Vogue magazine in his hands. Even under the dimly lit florescent fairy lights, Luke looked magical.  His lips were pursed in concentration, and his faint freckles were dotted across his nose. Eyebrows furrowed, he diverged his attention to you.

"Yes Y/N..." he responded in an equally teasing tone. Turning his head, you softly played with his curls as he rested in your lap. He twinkled his eyes like a newborn puppy, a look he knew was impossible to resist. You tried to endure the nonchalant disposition on your face, but the corner of your mouth gave you away. Smiling gently, you looked away and giggled. The effect this boy had on you couldn't be explained by science, it couldn't be explained by the gods. Gods, you were so in love with each other.

"What if we-" you began to say. He jokingly rolled his eyes. "I can't wait for another one of your "grand ideas" again Y/N. The last time you started with "what if we", we ended up in trouble with Mr. D and had to spend two months on stable duty," Luke laughed.

"No wait I'm serious! I promise we won't have to shovel horse shit ever again!" You said, trying not to laugh. 

"That was miserable, never again," Luke mocked you.

"I'm genuinely being serious, here me out!" You playfully eyed him.

"Okay Princess, what is it?" Luke whispered as he stared at your lips.

"What if we go into the city for some Christmas shopping..." you trailed off, unsure whether he would be willing to go with you. 

"Hmm," Luke closed the magazine and returned it to the magazine rack that Aphrodite gave you for your sixteenth birthday. You remember how elated when your mother met with you on your sweet sixteenth and winked at you, urging you to pursue Luke. Now here you were, two years later, with her advice fully followed through. 

There was a pregnant pause as Luke played with your fingers. "I hope you don't mean Christmas shopping at the camp gift shop," he jokingly said.  You shook your head quickly while you laughed, your curtain bangs swinging from side to side. "I've kind of had enough of the Stoll brothers and their practical jokes on these not-so-practical gifts." Rolling your eyes, you recalled last year when the Stoll brothers had slipped you two love potions, giving you googly eyes for Chiron and Luke groveling at Mr. D. It was a whole fiasco, leaving you and Luke thoroughly embarrassed for a minimum of two weeks.

"Noooo," you dragged on the word as you tilted your head. "I mean like, what if we went into the city to go shopping? Wouldn't that be fun," you suggested. "Do you think Chiron would let us?" You lightly breathed.

"Well, there's no way we'll know if we don't ask," Luke grinned. 

"Wait so you'd be willing to go shopping with me?" you held your breath. 

"Of course, anything for you Princess," Luke caressed your face. You were leaping with joy, and you practically ran out of the Aphrodite cabin to stalk Chiron for his permission. 

"Let's go, let's go!" You attempted to drag Luke as he groaned. "I'm comfy here, can we wait until tomorrow to find Chiron," Luke attacked you with his puppy-like eyes. Nope, you weren't going to fall for that now, no matter how impossible it was. 

"Please Luke we should go now, tomorrow morning is in twelve hours, something bad could happen and he may not let us go," you flashed him your best smile in retaliation. Playfully rolling his eyes, he tugged your hand and you fell onto the mattress. Squealing, you lay on top of him, what a goof. But you are so into this goof. Cheekily smiling, he smothered you in kisses: on your face, on your neck, on your collarbone. Peppering all surface areas of your body with love. 

You were violently blushing, turning a shade of red from your cheeks down to your neck at the sudden PDA. All of a sudden, you were self-conscious of your siblings in the cabin. But, they certainly paid you two no attention as they were used to the displays of affection. Awake and animated, Luke's eyes momentarily flickered animalistically, but they quickly returned to his typical soft-golden retriever demeanor. You both knew what he wanted at that moment, but given the circumstances, ew, gross.

"Okay," he whispered, satisfied at the reaction he got out of you. "Let's go," and he tugged you up suddenly as you guys ran out the door. The run eventually turned into the light jog because (a) you guys had just finished dinner and didn't want indigestion and (b) you had already exercised enough for today (the Apollo kids had run an archery obstacle course that was grueling, leaving a dull ache in your arms and feet)

"Chiron!" Luke called out into the distance, as we saw a faint outline of the centaur's shadow. He was going into the big house, probably to put curlers in his tail before he retired to his bed for the evening (Grover's words, not mine). Before he disappeared into the shadows, he gestured to us, letting us know to enter the Big House. Panting, as you were nearly exhausted at this point (don't get me wrong, I'm not unathletic, but the distance from the Aphrodite cabin to the Big House is quite far) At this point, you were going to get appendicitis before you could step into the Big Apple.

"Luke, wait a minute," you said, running out of breath. For a powerful demigod, you certainly had limited endurance.

"Are you okay Y/N," Luke dramatically gasped as he held your hand.

"I'm perfectly okay, just a tad out of shape," you sighed.

"Well Princess, just a few more steps and then we are there," Luke softly replied. Silently nodding your head to Luke's words of encouragement, you two approached the Big House. Unconsciously, you began to peel your cuticles, and Luke gently pried your hands away from your delicate, beaten skin. You deeply appreciated when he did things like that, paying attention to every detail, focusing on you, and double-checking that you were healthy and mentally okay.

The waning crescent that brightly illuminated the night sky depicted your mood; the fading of a bright idea in an endless world. This feeling wasn't new to you, and you could feel your energy waning. All the bravado that you had previously shown to Luke had wilted. Instead, you were now left uneasy, waiting for Chiron and Dionysus to chagrin you for your dangerously silly idea. A sinking pit of anxiety settled in your stomach. Damn, for how often my anxiety just shows up, it may as well start paying rent, you thought, trying to ease the war of emotions swimming in your mind.

Are you sure that you are okay? Luke bent down his head so he could be at eye level with you.

Yes, hopefully, you silently blinked back. He understood the scope of your anxiety, and during the especially bad days when you were left hugging yourself and biting at your nails, he would hug you instead and play with your fingers. Besides being a great boyfriend, he was an even more understanding person, and you loved that part of him.

Alright, gametime, Luke winked to you, as you two crossed the boundary between fun! rainbows! camp! and imminent doom featuring half a horse and an overgrown drunk toddler. The floorboard creaked as you two entered the Big House. Mustering up the remainder of your confidence, you took a deep breath and entered a book room where Chiron and Dionysus were sitting.

"We have a proposal for-," you gestured before being rudely interrupted by Mr. D slurping his diet coke. He raised an eyebrow, challenging you to continue. You momentarily glared at him before resuming your composure.

"Like I said, Luke and I have been thinking of-," you continued before being rudely interrupted for the second time by the overgrown diet coke-addicted toddler.

"Please, Dionysus, respect for the demigods for once," Chiron rolled his eyes, partially annoyed at Mr. D for acting childish, and possibly because we had interrupted his nighttime routine. Hey, if someone asked me to do something if I was in the middle of a manicure, I would also be thoroughly annoyed.

"To state the point that was never said," you pointedly glared at Mr. D and he tilted his head back at you to say fair point, "Luke and I were thinking of going into the city for one day to do some Christmas shopping."

The room was silent. All you could hear was the crackling of the fireplace, and even then as every log burned a hiss of malice escaped the chimney's base. Then Dionysus let out a big guffaw, startling everyone in the room.

"Oh my gosh you're joking are you? You came all the way to tell us that?" Mr. D gasped for breath and wiped his tears as he was laughing too hard. 

Dead silence echoed (can silence echo?) throughout the room. We were serious (for once). Mr. D could sense that no one else in the room was in a playful mood, and soon shut his mouth, a rare occasion. Under different circumstances, I would have probably pointed that out to Luke and given him a sly look, but tonight was not the night.

"Wait, you two are serious," Mr. D gestured to both of us while giving us both a pointed look of disappointment.

"Please Mr. D, we promise to be safe-" Luke began.

"For two senior counselors who have been at camp for a very long time, might I add, you two surely haven't gained any knowledge for all the time that you've been here," Mr. D frowned. 

"Please, we haven't gone anywhere in years. We promise to be safe and take any precautions needed," you pleaded. You just wanted this one thing. It might have been selfish, putting your lives in danger for a silly whimsical idea of yours, but it would make your first Christmas spent with Luke magical.

"You two are year-long campers for a reason," Mr. D firmly stated. He was correct in that respect, powerful campers like you two attracted monsters from far and wide. With your powerful charm speaking abilities and ability to create illusions of someone's greatest desires, and Luke's incredible sword fighting abilities, and not to mention his ability to bend the air in ripples as a traveling method, you two were quite a dynamic couple.

"Chiron," You pleaded, as you turned to Chiron. Chiron seemed deep in thought, as he pensively stroked his goatee (do I call it a horse-tee? centaur-tee?).

"These two of our campers are some of our best campers. They know how to adequately defend themselves in any situation tossed their way, am I correct?" Chiron turned to you two, the right corner of his mouth fighting a smile. You had never been so grateful for Chiron's existence until that moment (putting aside that time that he taught you the full extent of your illusional abilities, that was amazing of him).

"Yes, yes Chiron," Luke said, as you vigorously nodded your head.

"Yes, we will carry golden drachmas and Iris message you in case anything goes wrong," I tried to persuade them. "Not that we will inherently cause anything to go wrong," you trailed off.

"We will also bring weapons, just in case anything happens," Luke jumped in right away. "We will take care of ourselves, we promise."

"Think of this like a test, if we come back, we live, if not, well, we die. If we can't even handle the city that surrounds us, if we get called to a quest, well, that means we are screwed," you joked, also not joking at the same time. Hoping that this would persuade Mr. D, you gave Chiron a quick thumbs up, a symbol of your gratitude for having trust in you two.

"Hmm," Mr. D hummed for a while. You hoped he wasn't asleep, it was past that groggy toddler's bedtime.

"Well I permit Luke Castellan and Y/N L/N to spend the day in New York City tomorrow, granted they come back with gifts for me as well," Chiron winked.

"Oh yes, yes!" You excitedly said, a wide smile spread across your face.

"Of course, we will buy gifts for you Chiron, and for you as well Mr. D," Luke continued.

"Hmm, alright. And you two promise that you will stay safe?" Mr. D questioned.

"Yes sir," you two responded stoically.

"And within reach at all times?" Mr. D continued.

"Yes sir," you two nodded.

"Well I permit Lukas Clarkson and Y/nN La/N to spend the day in New York City tomorrow, granted they come back with gifts for me as well," Mr. D retorted, horribly butchering our names. Neither Luke nor I corrected him, fearful that he could suddenly have a change of heart and change his mind.

"Thank you so so so much!" You grinned.

"Have a great night!" Luke said, as he practically dragged you out the door.

"We did it! Oh my gosh, we are so good!" You excitedly hugged Luke the moment you exited the Big House. Hugging you and lifting you in the air, you two laughed joyously as you two landed on the lawn. Landing on top of Luke, you played with his hair. You hadn't left Camp Half-Blood without your mother, who would whisk you to some location in New York City for a day-trip gossip session.

"We did amazing, Princess," Luke smiled up at you. He squeezed your waist, causing a tornado of butterflies to travel up your navel.

"Well, we better get a long night's sleep tonight. We have an extremely long day tomorrow," you shyly smiled.

"Great idea babe, but first," Luke cheekily grinned, as he flipped you upside down. Startled, your eyes widened as Luke began to unabashedly pepper kisses across your face, neck, and collarbone. You didn't care that you two were in public, you were just grateful to have a wonderful boyfriend and wonderful people who could trust you two. You couldn't wait for tomorrow. 

comment to be a part of the taglist for part 2!

xoxo, cznszn 𐙚₊❤︎

© czennieszn on tumblr. do not repost, translate, plagiarize, or claim any of my works as your own.

[fanficforlife]

Chapter Ten

Tate came bounding out onto the porch where you and Kayce were enjoying a cup of coffee. "I'm done. Can we go now?"

"Did you finish all of your breakfast?" Kayce asked with a raised eyebrow.

"Yes." Tate groaned before grabbing your hand. "Can we go now?"

You downed the last gulp of coffee and smiled at him. "I see you already have my purse so yes, we can go."

"Gator gave me the card and list for shopping."

Kayce took your empty mug from you before the two of you stood up. "You do know that it's grocery shopping, right bud?"

"Yeah. But, Violet said she gets the vegetables from the farmers market and that there are people there that make chocolates and another one that makes ice cream and-"

"I get it." Kayce chuckled as he handed you the keys to his truck. When you took them he slid his arm around your waist. "I gotta get to work. Have fun with the rugrat."

"Now's the part where you kiss. I'll be in the truck." 

You giggled while Tate ran down the steps. "I'll see you later."

"Yes, you will." Your boyfriend leaned in and kissed you long and tenderly. "Stay with me tonight."

"If you're lucky." You teased, knowing full well that you would. Since you two had started having sex, you couldn't get enough of him. And, vice versa. He made you enjoy it again after years of dreading it. He made you feel safe and loved like you were the most beautiful woman in the world. It was the best sex you've ever had. It was like you finally found your other half. He was the missing piece that fits your heart perfectly and he felt it too. He couldn't get enough of just being near you. 

He knew you would be there and grinned. "Have a good day, baby."

"You too." You rose on your toes and kissed him. "Love you."

"Love you more." 

"Violet!" 

You and Kayce laughed at his impatient son. "Gotta go. See you later." He squeezed your waist before you slipped out of his grasp. 

*

"Oh! Look at that one!" Tate tugged on your arm as he pointed to a booth that was selling cakes of all sizes, decorated in every coloured icing under the sun. 

"Wow. Those are fancy."

"I think we should stick with cookies."

You chuckled. "I think you're right. Those look like a lot of work."

"There's the vegetable ones." Tate grabbed your hand before pulling you past the baking stalls towards the fruit and vegetables. "That one has apples! Can we get some and make apple pie? Oh, and muffins? And-"

"Yes, we can get your favourite fruit. We'll have to get a box of them because I don't think one of the bags will be enough for all of the baking you want to do." You laughed and went to wait in line. The large, well-stocked stand was the one you always went to and not because it was run by two good-looking men around your age.  They weren't just one of the sweetest couples you had ever met, they were your only friends who didn't live on the ranch. Not that you went on double dates or anything. It was just nice to have a conversation about something other than cows or horses occasionally.

"Violet!" The blue-eyed one grinned when he saw you. 

"Hi, Chris." You smiled at the dark-haired man. 

"It looks like I didn't beat the rush this time."

"No, you didn't." Mark, the blonde with green eyes, answered after coming over having finished with a customer. "But, we saved a box of the best back here for ya just in case. Aside from a couple of local restaurants, the ranch is one of our biggest customers. We gotta keep ya happy."

You laughed. "You two spoil us. Speaking of us, this is Tate. Tate this is Chris and Mark. They grow the best fruit and vegetables in Montana."

"Hi, do you have any more apples?"

"Sorry, but that was the last of them," Chris said of the case the woman in front of you was carrying away. 

Disappointment filled Tate's face. "Awe, we can't make pie and muffins tomorrow."

"We do have more on the farm though." Mark smiled at the little boy. "I'll make you a deal. I'll drop off some apples for you later today if you promise to bring us some baking next time you're in town."

"Really?!"

Chris chuckled. "Really."

You placed a hand on Tate's shoulder and looked at them. "You don't have to do that. We can get some next week."

"It's no problem at all. We don't have any other plans. A drive will be nice."

"Please, Violet?"

Your eyes went back to them and they nodded. "Okay."

"Yay! Oh, are you going to have pumpkins in the fall that we can carve?"

"We will," Chris said while Mark went to help a customer. "You can come out and pick the perfect one. We're also going to have a corn maze and other games. Plus, apple cider and all kinds of treats in the little shop on the farm." 

"Oh Violet, can we go?" Tate tugged on your arm. "Dad can come and we could do the maze and play all the games and try all the treats. Then we can get pumpkins to make Jack-o'-lanterns!"

A chuckle left your lips. "I think we can arrange that."

"Yay!" The brown-haired boy turned back to the dark-haired farmer. "Violet's dad's girlfriend. He really loves her, like a lot. All he does is stare at her when she's around."

"Tate." You scolded while Chris laughed. 

Tate looked up at you with a grin. "It's true." 

A light shade of red stained your cheeks as you pulled the credit card out of your bag. "Thanks for the vegetables. Tate, we better get moving. We have to stop at the grocery store next."

"Can we stop and get chicken nuggets for lunch after?"

"I think I could go for a burger."

"Yay!" 

"And, thank you for dropping the apples off later. You've made one little boy very happy."

"You are more than welcome. See ya, Violet. It was nice meeting you, Tate." Chris smiled. 

"Bye. I can take your bag for you." Tate offered so you handed it to him. After picking up the box of vegetables, you headed back to the truck. 

*

"You look amazing, like always." Chris grinned after getting out of his truck. "One of the restaurants in town looking for some vegetables." He said of Mark who was still buckled in and talking on his cell phone. 

"What the fuck?!" Kayce, who had been standing by the barn with Rip and Lloyd, pushed passed them and stormed over. 

You blushed while he pulled you into a hug. "Thanks."

"Get your fucking hands off her." Kayce yanked him away from you and punched him. 

"Kayce!"

He ignored you and hit him again. "You're not very bright, are you? Hitting on her when I'm standing right there!" 

"Kayce, stop!" You begged but he ignored you.

"I didn't-"

"Don't fucking lie to me! I heard you. I saw you!" He tackled Chris to the ground. "Stay the fuck away from her!" 

"Kayce. Kayce!" Rip called as he and Lloyd came running over and pulled him off of Chris. 

John came out onto the porch when he heard the commotion. "What the hell is going on out here?"

"This asshole was all over Violet!" Kayce pulled against Rip and Lloyd trying to get free. 

"No, he wasn't." You had tears in your eyes as you and Mark, who had just finished his call, helped Chris up. "I met him at the farmers market a couple of months ago. Tate saw the apples he was selling this morning and wanted some, but the person in front of us got the last of them. They had more at the farm and were nice enough to drop some off."

Kayce's face went white. The two farm hands let him go and his shoulders slumped. "Letty, I-"

"I'm sorry, Chris. I'm so sorry." 

"It's okay." He said with a soft smile. "I'll grab them. They're just in the back."

John came down the steps. "I'm sorry for my son's behaviour. We'll get them." He nodded to Rip and he went over and grabbed the box of apples out of the truck box. 

You handed Chris the money you owed him. "I'm really sorry."

"Don't worry about it."

"The apples look great." John held his hand out and Chris shook it. When they parted, the farmer found a hundred-dollar bill in his hand. He was about to hand the money back but John stopped him. "No, I insist. I'm sorry again and so is my son."

"Y-yeah. I'm sorry." Kayce apologized quietly. 

Chris nodded at him before giving your arm a squeeze. Mark did the same before they got in their truck.

The second they started driving away Kayce started walking up to you. "Letty."

You stepped back when he reached out for you, memories of Nick and his jealousy filling your head. "Gator wanted me to tell you that dinner's ready." A stray tear slid down your cheek as you turned and went inside. 

*

Everyone walked into the dining room while you set the last dish of food on the table. They sat down, joining Tate who had been upstairs washing his hands. 

You picked your plate and cutlery up off the table. "Hey, where are you going? Aren't you eating with us?" Tate asked. When his summer holidays started he insisted you start eating with them. The rest of the family had agreed so Tate picked your spot at the table, between him and Kayce.

"I'm not hungry. I'm going to get a head start on cleaning up so the kitchen will be ready for pie making tomorrow." He let out a cheer and you gave him a small smile before disappearing into the kitchen. 

After setting your clean dishes down, you gripped the edge of the countertop. Your mind was a mess as you stared at your reflection in the window. The darkening evening sky made it easy to see Kayce walk into the room. 

"Letty."

Your eyes went to your hands as he slowly made his way over, stopping behind you. 

"Letty, I'm sorry. I just heard him-then he touched you and-"

"I would never cheat on you." You stated quietly while continuing to stare at your fingers, which turned white from their grip on the countertop. 

"I know you wouldn't. I just...I'm scared." His hand hesitantly reached out, his fingers running down your arm. When you didn't pull away he closed the distance. "I'm scared you're going to find someone better. You're perfect and I'm...me. I have anger issues. I'm trying and failing at raising my kid. I love you so much it scares me. Tate loves you." His other hand went to your other arm and he leaned in, resting his forehead against the top of your head. "I'm sorry, baby. I'll do whatever you want me to. Please, forgive me."

You turned to face him. Your eyes didn't meet his though, they watched your fingers as they came up and fidgeted with one of the buttons on his shirt. 

"Letty?"

"Please...please, don't turn into him."

His hands came up and cupped your face. When he tilted it up he saw the tears pooling in your eyes. "Never, baby. Never." He leaned in and kissed you as a few tears spilled over. "I'll work on it, getting angry, jealous. I promise." You nodded. "And, I'll go into town tomorrow and apologize to him again."

A small smile pulled at your lips as you nodded again. "You should go eat before it gets cold."

"You're not going to?"

"I'm not that hungry. I'll grab something later."

"I'll grab something later too then. Do you want to wash or dry?" He grinned and picked up a dish towel. 

"Well, since you already have the towel, I'll wash." You turned and started filling the sink with water. Kayce's arm slid across your stomach and pulled you back against him. You stayed like that until the sink was full. 

After turning the tap off, he held you tighter. "I really am sorry."

"I know." Your hands slid across his arms before hugging them. "Chris and Mark know too. A few weeks ago when I saw them at the grocery store. We went for coffee while they were waiting to go to an appointment. They're really nice and they've heard about you and your family, the ranch. They know that you were in the Navy and about how much I mean to you." You looked at him in the reflection. "Mark used to be in the army so he knows that PTSD can affect you in different ways."

"Getting angry...I'm trying."

You leaned into him, "I know. You're doing a lot better."

"Except when it comes to you. What you've been through, your ex..." there was a tick in his jaw. "I promised to never let anything happen to you again. I just take it too far sometimes. I'm working on it. I really am trying."

You turned in his arms and wrapped yours around his neck. "I can tell. Everyone here can." Your lips pressed against his. "Now let's get these dishes done."

"Yes, ma'am." He said when you went back to facing the sink. He didn't move though. 

When his lips brushed against the spot where your neck and shoulder meet, you giggled. "Kayce."

He smiled against your skin. "Yes?"

"It's going to be pretty hard for you to dry these pots when you're standing there."

"I suppose you're right." His teeth gently nipped at the delicate spot and a small moan left your lips. He quickly spun you, crashing his lips against yours. When he pulled away the smirk that you loved spread across his face. 

You shoved him away with a giggle before focusing on washing the pots and pans Gator used to make dinner. Kayce settled in next to you, drying the dishes you set in front of him. A comfortable silence filled the room, only broken up by the conversations and laughter going on in the dining room. 

*

Once the dishes were done and dinner had been cleaned up, you went to the foreman's house. Tate had wanted to go to bed, even though there were still forty-five minutes before his usual bedtime. He was beyond excited about making pie for the first time and wanted to go to bed early so tomorrow would be here sooner. While Kayce tucked him into bed and read him a story, you went to wait for him in his bedroom. 

"Baby?"

You could hear the door shut behind him so, after turning the water off for the bathtub, you stepped out of the bathroom wearing nothing but one of his shirts. 

His eyes slowly drank you in. "Damn, you look good." 

A light shade of red crept across your cheeks as he closed the distance between you in two long strides. You unbuttoned his shirt and pushed it off his shoulders to the floor, followed quickly by his jeans. All while your lips stayed glued to his. 

His hands ran up your thighs and when he got to your hips they paused, finding no underwear to pull down. He smirked against your mouth before picking you up and carrying you to bed. 

"Mmm," you hummed as he kissed his way down your neck. Your hands found his waist and started to tug on the waistband of his boxers. 

After what he said to you in the kitchen about not turning into your ex and knowing he meant it, you needed him. And, he needed you just as bad. Once his boxers were down far enough he thrust into you. You gasped at the sudden fullness and when he did it again your eyes closed. "Oh, god."

His teeth bit down on your shoulder as he continued to move in and out of you. It wasn't long before your back started to arch off the bed as he kept hitting just the right spot over and over again. As you started to fall over the edge his lips met yours, swallowing your breathy moan and you melted into each other, falling together. 

Once your racing heartbeat returned normal, you slid out from under him and got off the bed. 

"No," he groaned and grabbed your hand. "I mean, the view is amazing but..." Your cheeks darkened and he grinned, sliding to the edge of the bed and pulling you onto his lap. "God, you're adorable."

"Stop." You turned and buried your face into his shoulder while the shade of red on your cheeks got even brighter. 

"Never," his chest vibrated with a chuckle. 

"Come have a bath with me?"

"I'm not much of a bath person but if you're in there with me I think I can make an exception. Lead the way, beautiful."

You slid your hand into his and made your way into the bathroom. "When I filled it I used scalding water so it should have cooled off enough by now." He got into the still bubbly water and you sunk across from him, closing your eyes. 

"Letty?"

"Hmm?" You opened your eyes when he stayed quiet. "Hey," after seeing his glassy eyes you went over and straddled his lap, taking his face in your hands, "what is it? What's wrong?"

"Why- I keep fucking up but you keep staying. You are goddamn perfect and could easily get any man you wanted. Why do you stay with me? After what happened before dinner-"

Seeing him so down made your heartache. "Because you are an amazing man and an even better father. Kayce, Tate looks up to you more than you know. He always talks about how much fun he has when he gets to help you around the ranch. He wants to be the foreman just like you when he grows up." Your thumbs ran along his jaw. "You went through a lot in the Navy, saw a lot. It changes a person. I didn't know you before you enlisted. I know you now. I fell in love with the man who came back from the war, with who you are today." He looked down, still ashamed. You tilted his head back so he would look at you. "You make me happy. You make me feel safe. There is no one else in the world I would rather be with. We can and we will get through anything. I love you, Kayce." 

"I am not worthy of you." 

A smile formed, "It's a good thing you're wrong and I'm right."

"You think so?" He finally smiled back, a small one but it was still there.

"I know so."

His arms engulfed you and crushed you against him. "I love you, Violet."

"I know. I love you." When he let you go you slid back to your spot. "Do you have a lot of work to do tomorrow? Tate wants to make pie and muffins. Mark and Chris said they would drop the apples off in exchange for some baking." 

"The farmers market is done at 2:00 pm, I'll have my stuff done by then. The three of us could go into town. Maybe go for coffee with them after? Tate keeps talking about the new playground they built by the farmers market."

You smiled, "Tate would love that. Chris and Mark would too." 

He nodded before finally lying back and relaxing, his fingers going back to mindlessly running up and down your knee. "I could get used to this. It's actually pretty nice." 

"I told you it wasn't that bad."

"You're right again." His crooked smile formed.

You watched him as he closed his eyes and rested his head back, admiring not only how handsome he was but how great of a person he was. Most men wouldn't have talked about their feelings like he did let alone go have coffee and talk to the man they just attacked. Whether he believed it or not, he was an amazing man and you were the luckiest woman in the world.

___________________________________________

Tag List: @alisbackalleybbq @a-beaverhausen @chloe-skywalker @wabi-sabi1090 @saintnourah

If you want to be added to the list just let me know :)

[writingforatwistedworld]

Could I request a self aware neige reacting to us being the definition of a Disney princess? Thanks and have a good day

Self-aware au

I do not take any responsibility for you reading this no matter which age group you are from!

WARNINGS: Yandere themes, obsession, possessive behavior, manipulation, poison, unhealthy relationship

Player is the definition of a Disney princess

Neige is already pretty naive (if you ask me) but even he had to do a double take when he witnessed you first hand

Animal magnet? Yes. Sunlight that hits you softly from the side like a well-meant cushion thrown by a passive-aggressive friend? Mhm. Choirs of angels in his head? They are living in there without paying rent

Even Neige is somewhere deep down like “mum, easy to abduct, just need sum cookies”

But we don't talk about his darker thoughts here (or at least not yet, point eight should start to get not do cuddly)

I wouldn't be surprised if RSA had something like “save the maiden in danger”-classes

Even if they don't, he will still somehow end up with you on a white horse riding into the sunset

I mean, hello? You thought he will leave alone? Just like that? (He hit you on the head or what??!)

When he saw you for the first time he was weary

Why did you seem so familiar... OH F-*insert un-princely vocabulary* YOU ARE THE OVERSEER!

But then again, how could you not be?

Just look at all the animals. The world is literally fighting for your attention!

So after mister “not so innocent innocence” finally decided that you are the one he always wants to be with he might do some things not so good for his reputation if his fans ever were to find out... unknowingly of course (does that make things better or worse?)

All I can say is, you, the innocent somehow seen as almighty cinnamon roll, believes every word he wipers into your ear

How ironic, Snow White is poisoning you this time... just without the apple and more with words

Before you know it you think that your friends are actually laughing all the gone about you and only see you as a fool

But no need to worry! He is here! Just for you! All you need to do is take his hand and follow him! I just don't know if you will ever see another human soul beside his own after that

[cosmicwhoreo]

seeing as ur cookie ocs/children (not sure what to call the little specimens) are,well,cookies-

If you could somehow (really no idea how you would) eat them,would they taste like anything in particular??

Oooooh~! A FUN ONE!!!

And for scale, I'm going to rate the edibility of each of my confectionary darlings on a scale of 1 to 10. starting with...

Horse Apple Cookie- 2/10

Uncomfortably bumpy and bitter, downright unpalatable on the taste buds. I mean... You CAN eat him and not really suffer too much in the long wrong. But nobody would recommend it... And frankly, the constant screaming of conspiracy nonsense and the fact he hasn't showered in two weeks just lowers his grade by like 1 point.

HoneyCrisp Cookie- 9/10

Actually tastes pretty good. Sweet and juicy, almost like a jolly rancher!

Grand Reef Cookie- 1/10

Uuuuuh... Maybe in his prime he tasted like rainbow sherbet ice cream like his colorful corals would lead you to believe. But nowadays...? Raw sewage. Feels and tastes like biting into a moldy apple. Uncomfortably squishy and black, like tar. Guarantee you will get violently ill from trying to eat him... He only gets a point because he will be constantly comforting you and giving all these sympathetic and apologetic pats and hugs the entire time you're puking your brains out from tasting him...

Dr Prawn Cookie- 5/10

Tastes as you'd expect. Shellfishy and meaty. But there is an uncomfortable crunch...

Sea Anemone Cookie- 4/10

Apparently you CAN eat anemones... Weird, but I guess fried anemone is a delicacy to some regions, I don't know. Tastes like shellfish, but she's too smol to really even be considered a light snack. And frankly, why WOULD you wanna eat a face like that? She's just excited to meet a big friend~!

Gold Choco Cookie- 0/10

Several problems would arise trying to chew on Goldie... Firstly, is trying to CHEW him; as his body is roughly 85% hard metal and high voltage wiring. He's hardly even dough at this point... And if you somehow managed to get by that, he tastes like oil and metal and leaves a buzz of static in your mouth. There's only a slight aftertaste of rich chocolate... But you'd have a better experience eating a chocolate-covered floppy disk before cracking a molar on his stale ass...

[scorchieart]

That Time Jin Had a Toothache 🍭🦷

Jin: Make hathte! Look upon your ailing brother and heed what becometh the man who over-indulgeth in pleathure!

Yves: You ate four candied apples and chipped a tooth. 

Jin: Excuthe me. A chipped tooth, three cavitieth, and thwollen gumth. Don’t thkimp out on my eulogy. 

Yves: I’ll be sure to mention your noble sacrifice— 

*Jin reaches for a bear-shaped cookie. Yves swats his hand away* 

Yves: Are you serious right now? 

Jin: Cut me thome thlack. Luke made thothe when he heard I fell in the line of battle.

Yves: Stop acting like a martyr, you glutton.

Jin: Everything I do ith in martyrdom, little brother. The eldetht readily thaccrificeth himthelf for the betterment of the flock.

Yves: Be quiet, we’re not birds. And you’re melting the ice with all that hot air you’re spewing. 

*Yves adds a fresh pack of ice over the melting one on Jin’s cheek* 

Yves: Euugh! And you got spittle on the cushions, too! Keep it in, will you? I cannot understand half the words you’re saying anyhow.

Jin: Aww, but you had the cutetht lithp ath a child, Yves. Made the whole palath thquee every time you opened your mouth. I remember it took yearth till you finally got Thariel’th name right. Thariel… Th-th-thariel… Yiketh, that’th a toughie.

Leon: Ah, dude. Now you’re getting spit all over my fancy suit.

Jin: Hey, you do look fanthy today… Hold it. What ith that in your handth?

Leon: Exactly what you think it is. A gun!

Jin: Leon, don’t lie to me. I played Luke’th route. I know what a gun ith.

Leon: No, you big goof. This is a heat gun. Totally harmless! On the lower settings, anyways.

Jin: Uhuh. And where did you get it?

Leon: From the All for Love! celebration event a few years back. Remember that photo shoot for the chibi dolls?

Yves: Don’t remind me. Nokto wouldn’t stop making jokes about how big my hand mirror was.

Licht: At least they didn’t stick you in a giant makeup bag. They made me pose for hours with those brushes and wands poking into my gut. I still have the bruises.

Jin: Uhuh. And how come I’m jutht finding out about thith now?

Yves: Maybe if your smile wasn’t so at-risk for cavities you would’ve been invited.

Jin: Pleath. The ladieth love a man with a thweet tooth—OUCH! Leon! What the heck, man!

Leon: Sorry, bro. I’m under strict orders from Yves to puff you with hot air anytime you make an allusion to sweets.

Jin: Who died and made Yves king? I’m not thaying that in mockery, by the way. I’m jutht upthet thith ith yet another event you didn’t invite me to, it theemth.

Yves: It’s for your own good! A man at your age needs proper discipline to keep out of trouble. And since words haven’t worked, we’ve elected to resort to other means.

Jin: *gasp* You didn’t.

Yves: I haven’t yet. But if you don’t show any progress soon I’m calling in the royal dentist. I mean it, Jin.

Jin: Thcary. Back me up here, Licht.

Licht: …

Jin: What’th up, buddy? Cake got your tongue—Yeowch! What wath that for?

Licht: You said the c-word. 

Jin: Not you too! Why d’ya thmile when Yves thaid the d-word? And do ya have to poke me with that giant lanthe? 

Licht: Increasing the surface area of pain deamplifies the sensation at its source.

Yves: Who taught you that?

Licht: I read it in a book. *poke*

Jin: ACK! That’th it. I don’t want you talking to Chevalier unthupervithed anymore. 

Licht: As soon as you learn to stop poaching others’ pastries. Horse and I were looking forward to those candy apples all week.

Jin: Fine, fine. I’m thorry. There, can you let me go now?

Yves: Not until you’ve proven you’re completely cured of your nasty saccharine habit. We’re not leaving this room until you can go a full day without eating these cookies.

Jin: You’d let them go bad like that? That’th too cruel!

Leon: Yeah, I’m with him on this one, Yves. Couldn’t we just use a picture of cookies instead? Would hate to see Luke’s work go to waste.

Yves: Oh, lay off it. They’re not going to spoil. And anyways, we’re feeding them to the horse at the end.

*Horse whinnies happily*

Leon: That’s one weird horse.

Licht: He’s Clavis’s.

Jin + Leon: Ahh.

Yves: Speaking of, will you lot please keep it down? I had to abandon my post for this and I don’t want a certain someone to find out.

Jin: No one appreciateth your thaccrifith more than I.

Yves: Then you’ll take it up with you-know-who should my room be defiled?

Jin: If you’re that worried, let’th end thith confinement early and you can go keep a lookout for Clavith. Trutht your big bro. I’m completely cured! 

Yves: I trust my trust in you has plummeted since you gave yourself that second cavity this month.

Jin: Thothe éclairth were worth it—Ouuuuch!

Leon: Keep your eye on the prize, Jin. And your drool off my pants.

Yves: Leon, try to avoid the ice pack when you blast him, please.

*Yves adds yet another ice pack*

Jin: You know, I’ve been waiting for thomeone to explain, but what’th with the cat hat, Yves?

Yves: Well, as I was saying before I was so rudely interrupted, we all had to sneak away from our typical duties to set this up. Licht disguised himself as a guardsman. The most adorable one in the entire palace no less, but it served our purposes. Leon is a dapper gent, which for some reason this place seems to always have an overabundance of. 

Jin: And you’re the pretty kitty to round out the gang?

Yves: *face turns red* I am the phantom cat who travels by shadow and blends in with the night, obviously.

Licht: It’s noon. You just shut the curtains.

Leon: Plus we didn’t need to sneak around. We’re kind of in charge of the place.

Licht: And it wasn’t so hard. I rode this horse all the way up here and no one noticed.

Leon: Hmm, maybe we need to review the guard rotations.

Jin: Licht, I don’t want you talking to Clavith unthupervithed anymore.

*horse grunts in agreement*

Yves: Back to the point! Maintaining the secrecy of this mission is of the utmost importance. What would it mean for us if word got out that the First Prince still gets cavities at his age? 

Leon: Sounds like a good excuse to set up that kingdom-wide dental hygiene education campaign we’ve been talking about. Jin can be like our mascot.

Jin: I can keep my lollipopth then? Thweet! Ouch!

Licht: Stop encouraging him, or we’ll never get out of here.

Yves: Um, hello? Did anyone even listen to what I’ve been saying?

Leon: You mean ninja cat? Looking sharp!

Yves: Is that all you…? Never mind. Just pipe down before someone hears.

Licht: If you mean someone besides us four, they already know.

Yves: WHAT?! Who knows?

Jin: Who knowth? Hehe.

Yves: Quiet, you. *covers Jin’s face with another ice pack* Answer me, Licht.

Licht: Well, Nokto for one. Technically he caught me on the horse, but I didn’t think it counted cause it was when we were still outside.

Yves: Curse him and his impeccable detective skills. I bet he deduced Jin was in trouble just by looking at your endearing getup.

Licht: No. He said, “What’s with the horse?” so I told him. He gave me that bunny to pass along to Jin as well as his well wishes.

Jin: *laughs beneath the ice* 

Yves: Licht, I don’t want you talking to Nokto unsupervised anymore. 

Leon: Lighten up, Yves. They were just trying to help. Like how Luke made those cookies. And that pillow there is the beta version of Clavis’s latest invention, or so he told me. Even Chevalier—

Yves: WAIT! You saw Clavis? When?

Leon: On my way over here. He flagged me down in the hall to talk about how happy he was to see so many dapper gentlemen around as of late.

Yves: But you didn’t tell him about you-know-what, did you?

Jin: *giggles beneath the ice* 

Leon: Nah, got him hooked on an even bigger scandal, if you catch my drift.

Licht: You didn’t tell him I nabbed his horse, did you? I’m telling you we were really looking forward to those apples.

Leon: No. I told him Yves left his room unattended.

Yves: You what?!

Leon: So much for keeping our voices on the down-low. Listen, I promise I’ll take care of whatever he leaves in there myself. Prince’s honor.

Yves: I may just cry.

Jin: Hehe, me too! Ouch, thith ith tho cold.

Leon: If you must, do it right into that pillow. Clavis said amusing things will happen when it gets wet.

Yves: And you let Jin rest on it?!

Licht: You’re the one who keeps piling melting ice bags on him.

Yves: Oh no, Jin!

*Yves removes all ice bags. Jin looks up with a twitchy smile.*

Jin: I can’t feel my fathe. Hehehe.

Leon: I gotcha bro.

*Leon sets the heat gun to a comfortable temperature. The boys sigh with relief once Jin’s face unfreezes.*

Licht: That was brutal.

Leon: Oh, yeah. I ran into Chevalier, too.

Yves: Oh, I knew this was a bad idea from the start! Why did you put me in charge, Leon?

Leon: Hey, you’re the best man for the job and you’re doing amazing. Plus, it’s fine. Chevalier was cool about it.

Licht: He never really does care when we get hurt.

Leon: He didn’t mention Jin, but he did save my behind. See technically I was supposed to return the heat gun right after the photo shoot. Something about preventing anachronisms and fourth-wall breaks, or whatever. But, I mean, come on! Who’d pass this thing up? Winters have been so easy ever since. Goodbye freezing toes! And you should see how it cooks meat!

Yves: Get to the point.

Leon: I’m getting there. So Clavis dumped the pillow on me because Sariel was chasing him. Caught me off guard so I didn’t get a chance to hide my gun. Before Sariel got too close, Chevalier showed up out of nowhere and blocked his view. That cloak of his is really impressive, I’d bet he could hide the horse behind it. Luckily, Sariel was too preoccupied with hunting down Clavis to stick around and ask questions.

Jin: Aha! Told ya Chevalier’th a good man at heart! Thweet ath pie, that guy—OUCHIE! Come on, Licht, it’th a figure of thpeech!

Leon: Chevalier said to make sure no outsiders knew we had access to such a hi-tech weapon. Personally, I think he just wants a turn at it. They stuck him with that giant lipstick tube at the photo shoot, remember?

Jin: Et tu, Chevie? I take it back, he'th rotten and I don't want any of you talking to him anymore.

Yves: Whoa, so not even Sariel’s allowed to know? I feel unworthy to have access to such illicit information.

Leon: Hey, you’re a worthy prince and a valued member of this team. Don’t you forget it.

*Licht and horse nod in agreement*

Yves: *blushes* You mean it? Gosh, I’m sorry I’ve been so hard on you all today. Guess the pressure got to me. But no more! We’re a team, and we’re in this together. Through the good and the—ARE YOU KIDDING ME, JIN?!

*Yves swats Jin’s hand away from the cookies again.*

Jin: What? Through the good and the bad, yeah? My weakneth maketh the retht of you thtronger. You’re welcome.

*Yves grunts and stands. Jin sits up and holds the bunny like a shield.*

Jin: Whoa whoa whoa. Maybe that made you a little too thuper thtrong, haha. Now it’th your turn to share a weakneth tho I can catch up. Okay? 

*Yves grabs Licht’s lance.*

Jin: Come on. Ninja kitty? Pleathe?

*Yves takes aim.*

Jin: Pretty pleathe with sugar on top—Ouch! Actually, I detherved that one. Thankth, Leon.

Leon: No problem, bro. Hey, you might wanna dodge.

*Yves strikes with the lance. It pierces the bunny’s head where Jin’s stomach lay moments before. Water starts spouting out of the doll.*

Yves: Wha—why was there water in that bunny? And why’s it so cold?

Licht: Oh, I forgot to mention. It’s an ice-pack bunny. Nokto got it on his last trip to Jade. He said it’s really popular with the kids there. Guess its guts melted.

Leon: Aww, that’s sweet—OW! Actually, I deserved that one. Thanks, Jin.

Jin: Anytime. I vowed to only uthe thethe fithtth to therve my kingdom, after all.

Yves: Okay, I have no idea what he just said, but everyone off the bed because that pillow is smoking.

*Clavis's pillow shakes and fumes. Everyone rushes to the walls.*

Licht: Maybe we shouldn’t have brought in the gifts.

Leon: And maybe we shouldn’t have tossed the only key to the room out the window.

Jin: It meanth the world to me that you all care.

Yves: If we don’t make it out of this. I want you all to know that it was an absolute honor and disaster working alongside you.

Licht: Ditto.

*Horse whinnies solemnly*

Jin: It wath one heck of a ride, boyth.

*Jin pulls lollipops out from his pockets and pops them into each of his brother’s and the horse’s gaping mouths with a salute.*

Leon: *spits out his lollipop* It’s not over yet.

Yves: Leon! What are you doing? Get back here!

Leon: Prince’s honor, Yves. I said I’d take care of it.

Yves + Licht: LEON!

*Leon straightens his suit and gives a thumbs up over his shoulder. Jin holds Yves and Licht back as Leon jumps onto the bed and covers the smoking pillow with his body. For a few moments, nothing happens. Then Leon begins laughing uncontrollably.*

Yves: Oh! It’s turned him insane! Give me the lance back, Licht, we have to put him out of his misery.

Leon: Relax, hehe! It’s some sort of laughing gas! Look, look—hahaha—the tag here says: THE CHUCKLE CUSHION! Bad dreams keeping you from your good night’s sleep? Simply turn the other cheek and let some of your blood, sweat, and/or tears fall onto the cushion’s surface to release a relaxing dose of bliss to lull you back to a happier dreamland. Warning: maximum of 9 droplets per single use; not recommended for users who suffer chronic excessive crying, sweating, or blood loss. Side effects may include uncontrollable laughter, freezing face, and increased desire to consume sugar. From Series VII of the Lelouch Trap Series™. Hahahahaha! 

Yves: Ohh, we practically drowned that pillow. And now he's caught the uncontrollable laughter.

Leon: Actually, that last 'Haha' was written on the tag, too. The most legible part, no less. Hehehe.

Yves: The loon. 'Blood loss' he writes, can you believe him?

Jin: *eyes the lance in Yves’s hands* At leatht he put a warning.

Yves: As if you ever read the fine print.

Jin: I’d be inclined to thtart today. Printhe’th honor.

Yves: *sighs* Very well. I suppose that’s enough excitement for one confinement. Come on, Leon, we’re taking you to the physician. But I’m keeping my eye on you, Jin. You’re on probation until—Hey! Where are the cookies?

Jin: Wathn’t me. Honetht!

*Jin holds up his hands in surrender. Lollipops and cookies and cakes slip out from underneath his shirt onto the floor in a sugary heap. On the other side of the room, Licht feeds Luke’s cookies to the horse and smiles as he opens the curtains and looks out the window.*

Leon: Scouting out the physician for me, Licht? Hahaha.

Licht: Sort of. I asked Nokto to call for the dentist, and he’s just arrived.

[dabiconcordia]

The Cowboy, the Cook and the Horse He raises both hands and tips back his hat – a round, sweat-stained halo that circles his head – and his elbows thus raised look like angel wings, although of the sharp and pointy shape. He busts out his chest ‘til his buttons, they snap open, revealing the red underwear favored by cowboys at home on the range. Then he flings his leg over the pommel and leaps off like a trout with an eye on the fly, lands hard on his heels, his spurs all a-jingle, and walks in a cloud of dust raised from his chaps, while his eyes roam the ridge where the buffalo roam. Now his horse can be hateful, and given to biting and bucking him off on no provocation. But he loves her and gives her sugar and apples he begs and he barters for with the cook, who seldom would speak a discouraging word. Cookie never lets on he’s happy to help him – for what good is a cowboy without a good horse? by Leslie Hodge

[iheartyvesss]

save a horse | j. miller preview

and all the ladies say,

“save a horse, ride a cowboy!”

cowboy!joel x black coded!southern!reader (anybody can still read, only hairstyles are specified)

warnings: js sweet ole girl dad joel, small bits of flirting, tommy’s a flirt and joel doesn’t like it, and joel is a lil awkward but we love him!!!

wc? 1.5k (this a preview y’all!)

if any lingo is wrong you’re fuckin lying because i’m a texan born and bred RAGHHHH 🦅🇺🇸

moving to austin from dallas with your dead best friend’s daughter wasn’t on your 2002 bingo card. ellie was precious to you for a number of reasons, her fiery attitude and brown eyes that reminded you of your best friend. it all hurt you, but this little girl came first. her safety came first.

“ellie! babe, c’mon now, you gotta at least unpack your room.” the teen looked up at you over the book that was barely propped up on her chest. ellie scrunched her face at you, “i am aunty, just give me a second. the house isn’t goin’ anywhere, i’ll be just fine.” you sighed heavily, leaning on the archway of her door. ellie’s been pretty normal, but you don’t think it’s normal for her to be normal.

she’s lost her mother, you cried for days after losing yours. you remember that feeling of emptiness; not being able to believe the woman who gave birth to you was gone. you purse your lips instead, sighing in a more gentle manner before moving closer to ellie. “c’mon, up! let’s go. we’re baking and meeting our neighbors.” ellie groaned but let you take her hands, whining when you pulled her all the way up out of the bed.

“promise not to run from me and i’ll make you the red velvet brownies you like.” you squished her cheeks in your hands while grinning from ear to ear. you knew your niece couldn’t resist them, even if she was mad at you for making her assist. ellie whined in your grip, squirming around to get your hands away from her cheeks. “fine! fine! oh my god those stupid nails hurt, aunty. jesus fuck.”

her response is a hit to the back of her head, “ow.” you snort as you make your way out of the room, tying your soft locs up into a ponytail. “then watch your mouth, sugar. hurry on downstairs when you’re done. i already started the oven.” did you lie about beginning to bake to get ellie to come out of the hole that was her bare room? yes. and you are very proud that it worked.

you’re barely tying your apron back around your waist when ellie’s loud stomps come down the stairs of your new house. she fakes a frown before smiling at the aroma of chocolate and strawberries, hints of vanilla stretching across the entire first floor. you pretend not to see the scene that unfolded in front of you, instead turning to your buttercream frosting that you were mixing. “ellie baby, can you get the pie shells out for me? poke holes in the bottom with the fork then sit them in the oven for a bit. you know the drill, sweet pea.” she hums in response, yanking her little apron off of it’s hook and tying it around her body.

ellie’s practically sliding around the kitchen in her black and red polka dot socks, having the time of her life racing no one in the space of the kitchen. you laugh at her antics, gesturing for her to come over to you, “come ‘nd taste the frosting, let me know if it’s too sweet or no.” she practically scrambles to you, taking the spoon from your hand. “umm, ‘s alright. it needs more vanilla and a little more powdered sugar.”

“ugh, my little baking champion thank you so much!” you kiss the side of her head and get back to work, letting her get back to her own job that you’d provided her with. she laughed softly at your comment before she went back to her previous job of poking holes in your pie crusts. it’s not long before you’re pulling brownies and cookies out of your oven, letting them cook before icing the cookies with such carefulness that it makes ellie laugh.

you allow ellie to scoop the apple pie mixture into the pie shells before she settles them back in after placing the lattice on top of all three pies you’d made. you wait around another hour to let the pies settle and pack everything up, letting ellie hold the cookies whilst you grab one of the pies. “ellie do i look okay?” you mumble to her, turning slightly in front of the mirror on the wall near your front door. she snorts, covering it up with a cough. “you look fine aunty. what? you wanna date the neighbors?”

“absolutely n- ellie!” your face heats but you don’t say much else, instead opening the door for your niece since her hands were more full than yours. you do look fine though. your little sundress you wore for the drive down here from dallas was a soft blue with light pink flowers patterned on it along with complimentary white sandals. it complimented your skin well, enhancing the glow of it against the sun. your soft locs were still in a ponytail from your baking, and you’d had your lashes done shortly before you moved. you were particularly satisfied with the lip combo you’d mustered up before you left; a pretty brown liner with a pink filler. perfect.

ellie sets the cookies down on the floor in the bottom of your backseat, and you follow suit by sitting the pie on top of the containers. the both of you climb into the car once you’re positive everything is in order and won’t fall over or anything of the sort. the drive to the next set of land isn’t far, maybe 5 minutes, and you get a chance to truly take in the beauty of the countryside in austin.

when you pull up, you notice that your neighbors seem to be leaving the house just as you drive up. there’s two older men and a little girl, and you can only assume she’s one of the men’s daughter. your eyes trail over the taller one, though. he’s buffer than the shorter one and has a full beard. your ‘thing’ for beards was really tempting you with this one. he was clearly older than you as if that helped your attraction, but you purse your lips and relax your shoulders. no need to be weird in front of the new neighbors already.

you park quickly, biting down on your lip to hold any final nervous remarks your niece could possibly make fun of you for. ellie grabs the pie since she’s already on the side, setting it on top of the car and grabbing the cookies. you hum a soft ‘thank you’ to her before grabbing the pie and making your way towards your neighbors.

“excuse me?” your voice is saccharine to joel’s ears, and he damn near gets whiplash trying to turn to see who’s voice he’s hearing. “are you the millers?” you follow up despite a lack of response from the older man. you smile sweetly and gesture for ellie to come towards you. joel nods dumbly, swallowing hard before stepping forward to greet you. the girl that you mentioned earlier, who looked a little older than ellie, giggled at her dad (uncle?), and skipped her way next to him.

“i- uhm- we- damn.” joel stuttered terribly, rubbing a hand over his face before sighing heavily. sarah giggles before speaking up for her stunned father. “hi!! i’m sarah miller, this is my dad joel and my uncle tommy.” she smiled brightly at the two of you, curls bouncing as she spoke. tommy nodded from next to sarah, sticking his hand out for you to shake. “hi, darlin’! i’m tommy, nice to see a new pretty face ‘round here.” you feel your smile widen a bit, flattered by the younger miller’s words. you reach your hand out to meet his, but tommy turns it in his hand and presses a kiss to the back of yours.

joel’s stare practically burns through the two of you.

“cute.” is all you say, gently taking your hand back to pull ellie towards you. “i’m (name) (last name) and this is my niece ellie williams. we just moved into the house a few minutes down the road and wanted to properly greet everyone. i come bearing gifts, of course, but i can put ‘em back until you guys come back if i have to?” joel shakes his head, smiling at the thought you’d clearly put into the baked goods. “no, that’s fine sugar. we were jus’ goin’ to get some groceries.” his hand brushes yours briefly as he takes the pie, and you feel electricity shoot up your spine. oh you want him.

“me ‘n ellie can go ahead and head out and let you three get to it. we’re sorry to interrupt, but i hope we could come back over some time just to hang out or for anything else.” joel’s eyebrows shoot up at the end of your question but if he caught onto anything he didn’t say much. “’course. thank you again for the cookies ‘n pie. real sweet of you to make ‘em, sugar.” you bite down on your lip to hide the smile threatening to appear on your lips. ellie laughs beside you, tugging on your arm after she’s handed off the cookies. you glance back up at him briefly before nodding your head towards the car, sending your niece towards it.

“no problem, cowboy.”

[velvetfoxgames]

Hi Anna! Do you have any random or obscure facts of any of the LIs that you’ve wanted to share, but haven’t had the right opportunity to? If not please delete hehe

Alexei

Loves animals but is a little scared of horses

Can write and speak backwards

Holds pens and pencils strangely

Brooklyn

Has four types of ironing boards

Likes to doodle floral/Victorian borders on paperwork

Immune to wasp stings

Leo

Sometimes gives away free cookies at his cafe

Surprisingly good at chess

Has a super long road trip playlist but has yet to actually go on said road trip

Milo

Has a pilot's license

Eats oranges and kiwis like apples

Can fall asleep anywhere

Rory

Double jointed

Once won a poetry contest in school

First job was a bagger at a grocery store

Tobias

The only food he dislikes is celery

Sponsors foxes at a fox rescue

Knows many hand shadow puppets

[delopsia]

delly 🍓✨ i’m glad you’re feeling better 🌻

let’s say rhett and bobby are late coming back from the stadium… reader has hopped in a bath with all the fixings when—just as they’ve reached maximum relaxin’—the beloved husbands come (lovingly) barging in with a big basket of goodies from the mortons (y’all missed the first farmer’s market of the autumn season), and bobby (for once) is trying to get one (let’s be real, two) of those giant chocolate chip pumpkin cookies right now. that is, until they see you, looking pretty as a picture, glistening in the warm glow of the lights. are they trying to climb in the tub with reader, or are they content to sit beside the tub and hold reader’s hands while telling them about what they missed down at the stadium with archie?

💐 t

ps. OMG THEY (WE? lmao) GOT MARRIED!! I’M SO HAPPY!! I LOVE THESE THREE AND THIS STORY AND YOU FOR SHARING IT WITH US OMG 🌻💛🌻

pps. i love your CREEPIN IT COUNTY header omg 🧡

I'm glad that you like the Creepin It Country thing because that was my first and only attempt at making my own header 😭🧡 But yes!! Omg, I'm just glad that the wedding is finally over 😭 because now I can finally move on to expanding on the rodeo stuff and formally introducing the Floytt family critters.

I have this image in my head of Bob freezing mid-bite when he sees the Reader in the bath. Full on deer in the headlights type thing. Just a few seconds ago, he was half-assedly trying to evade Rhett (because, for some reason, that menace doesn't want one of the cookies in the container; he wants Bob's cookie), and now he's just barged in on the Reader's bath.

Rhett's the one that breaks him out of it. Finds the perfect chance to swipe in and steal a bite big enough to take a fourth of the cookie and just bounces right on in. Watcha doin'? How long you been in here? What all did you use? He's already curled up next to the tub by the time Bob remembers that he can move.

Truth be told, Rhett really wants to climb in, but he waits to be invited, sits there like a big ol' puppy dog until the Reader actually opens their mouth and tells him that it's okay to join them.

Bob very well could fit, too. Technically speaking, this thing can fit Reader, Rhett, Bob, and Mr and Ms. Morton (this was learned when y'all were experimenting to see if this tub would be big enough before buying it), but Bob is a little more content to watch and show off everything they brought back.

There's all kinds of stuff in this wicker basket. A little gnome with leaves on his hat, a tiny pumpkin, three of those locally made ceramic mugs that sold out in the first hour, a few bath bombs from the little business across the street from the farmer's market.

Pumpkin bread, apple cobbler, pumpkin bundt cake, way too many cookies to count, oh, and Willow (Archie's wife) sent a whole tray of her homemade maple cinnamon rolls!

There's so much that they nearly forget about the rodeo in its entirety. They had a bull nearly break through the fence, and another one decided that he was not going to be wrangled out of the arena. Rhett brought Maeve, Isabella's filly, out for the first time to try and get her used to the environment, and she...may have gotten into trouble for poking her little head over the fence and trying to bite the horse Bob was on.

"She's still a baby," Rhett grumbles.

But Bob just glares at him. "She's a menace."

...he says as if he didn't just buy her a new custom halter because she outgrew the other one. And there's definitely not a bag of treats for her downstairs...and he definitely did not buy those for her right after the biting incident...definitely not.

The bickering about how he's unintentionally spoiled that little horse continues long after Reader has gotten out of the bath, crawled into some comfy pajamas, and snuggled up in bed to watch a movie.