#hopefully this was still somewhat coherent

[some-internet-stranger]

revalink!!

https://www.tumblr.com/dizzying-faust/614856861677699072?source=share

(Answering that Other ask gave me the motivation to answer this one as well)

Thank you for the ask, it was a TON of fun, even If it took me forever to answer. Also, a little warning, this Post is LONG as HECK and Kind of rambly

Revalink- Ship It!!!!!!!

What made you ship it?

I played Breath of the Wild in 2021 during the lockdown because I was finally bored enough I guess? (Funfact, I actually hated Botw before it came Out, because I was a little hater and didn't Like that the Zelda formula was changing lolol). The important takeaway Here is, that I already knew the Story and all memory cutscenes before I played it. The Other cutscenes Not included were new to me, however.

Revali was the first Champion I ended up saving (revali's gale is the best ability and I needed it for the towers). I was faintly aware of the existence of Revalink but never seriously considered it. Now while I was freeing the Terminals and got Bits and pieces of dialogue I thought that it was funny to interpret Revali having a crush on Link and that being the reason he's so mean to him. And it is funny tbh, but at that Point it was Just a joke to me.

And then came the fight against Wind blight, and oh. The dialogue right before?? The dialogue after?????? I should mention at this point that I played the Game in German, so many translations were different. In english, right before the fight, Revali said something along the lines of "Good luck (...) I only lost because I was winging it" and german He tells Link to be careful ("be careful, you hear me?")(also the delivery of that line, bro, voice actor was Not messing around) This in on itself didn't make me ship it, but it Set the tone.

The scene after the fight when Revali is saved and gives Link His gale... I almost dont know how to Put it into words, but the tension in this Scene? When He Looks at Link as If waiting for him to say something? When He Turns around "nevermind Just Go"??? It feels Like there are so many Things left unsaid, Like There's so much more to be said, even though their relationship is technically wrapped up at this point? It honestly caught me so off guard. Not one Scene with any of the Other Champions has this Kind of tension, Not even mipha (who is a Love interest for Link).

Well, then I went on Tumblr and my fate was basically sealed, lol.

TL:DR: because I played the game

What are your favorite things about the ship?

I Love the Potential of this ship! Theres so many ways how this can be insanely funny (this is one sided rivals to lovers, does it get any better than that?), it can be so incredible sad (death!! Amnesia!! Letting Go!!! One sided!!! Unspoken!!! Not meant to be!!! Lots of Other Things Im forgetting!!)

Its INSANE how Well they Work together, especially since I doubt it was done on purpose.

I have so many more thoughts, but I can't Put them together properly, so I'll leave it at that. The next point is Sort of a continuation of what I Love about this ship anyway

Is there an unpopular opinion you have on your ship?

The fact that this ship isnt Canon and will/can never be canon is actually one of the best things about it, in my opinion (dont know If its an unpopular opinion)

It fits right in, in a way.

I Love it when two characters are written in a way, were they Sort of complete each other. Where they Share parallels, goals, have opposing personalities that still Match somehow, where they are each Others Drive and Motivation. Where their Stories Just fit so Well together that you know that they were clearly written for each other.

Link and Revali were Not meant to work Well together, Not Like this at least. Of course Revali was written as a foil to Link (correct me If I'm wrong please, I think this was the Case), so them being opposing is intentional.

If you think about these characters for a certain amount of time, Just slightly more in depth, you will find yourself with the revelation that they are so very similar, they would likely be able to be friends If they Just worked through their differences. But they never do! They never have the time/ are too caught Up in pushing others away in their own ways. They could have been something, but never ended Up being.

This ties so nicely into the theme of destiny and fate (kinda.... I feel Like despite setting this Up as a theme, botw doesnt really Go anywhere with it, so it mostly works nicely in fanfiction and such... Although, If you think I missed something about botw, pls let me know. I'm Not an expert on themes)

Theyre doomed by the narrative and the narrative Said they could never be, so they never were (Its kinda fun how that element is true in the real world as Well as in game)(is what I'm getting at)(theyre Not written as Love interests but MAN do they Work as a romantic couple)(cruel, poetic, amazing, ughhh?!???)(them working Well together as a couple was a coincidence, which again, opposes the destiny thing)(this ship has me in a chokehold, can you Tell)

I'm Just saying a bunch of words, I Hope they make sense... I might have also went off the rails a bit... Eh

If you're still here, thank you so much for reading!!

I do actually really Love answering my Inbox and playing ask games, pls dont let my imcompetence to answer them in a timely manner discourage you from sending one😅😅

[cockaiine]

༊*·˚FUCK AROUND .ᐟ

you drive satoru home after a night clubbing, but he's waayy too drunk to watch over his words. what happens when he makes a confession? will he regret it later....or not?

ɞ⁺ contains : best friend!satoru gojo x fem! reader, drunk satoru at fist, suggestions of drunk sex, slight mention of car crash, vaginal sex, unprotected sex (stay safe n wrap it up!), reader gets called baby, riding position, semi-public sex (satoru has maids)

ɞ⁺ w.c : 3.2k-ish

ɞ⁺ note : came back from the dead yayy. thank u @screampied for beta reading i was too tired to look at it another time skfjklsdjg,, n thank u @satoruwiki i had a stroke writing the dialogue

You never imagined Satoru would consume that much alcohol, truly, you didn't.

“Mmm... give me a kiss... just one…” your best friend mumbles, his words slurred as he collapses into the car seat. In that moment, you're immensely grateful you didn't indulge in as much alcohol as you had initially planned; it's evident he's in no condition to drive you home.

“Satoru…” you sigh, shutting the door to the driver's seat firmly. “Please, spare me.”

The journey commences with a symphony of Satoru's complaints. He's a particularly whiny drunk, grumbling about the seatbelt, his discomfort in the car seat, and even about the moon, insisting it's following him. He just won't shut up, and you swear you'll poke his eye out. The street is shrouded in darkness, and you don’t own a driver's license; the last thing you need is an accident.

However, mercifully, he soon succumbs to a deep slumber, his face pressed against the cold windowpane.  You contemplate taking a picture to tease him with later, but ultimately decide against it.

When you finally arrive at his residence, the realization dawns on you that you have no means of getting home tonight. Summoning an Uber dressed in your current state past midnight doesn't strike you as particularly safe. Crashing at Satoru's seems like the more prudent option, unless he sobers up and offers to drive you home.

“‘Toru,” you poke his shoulder gently, “Satoru, come on, we're here.”

It takes several attempts to rouse him, but when he finally stirs, he startles, nearly banging his head against the window in the process.

“Huh-?” He seems marginally more coherent now; hopefully, he can manage to walk on his own. “Where are we?”

“Your place,” you reply wearily, fatigue seeping into your muscles, pleading for rest. “Come on, you spilled tequila all over yourself.”

“Did you drive?” His bleary eyes narrow slightly, heavy lids drooping.

“No,” you fib, “the car drove itself.”

“Oh,” he nods, a chuckle escaping you at his confusion. He appears on the verge of questioning further, but you beat him to it. Stepping out of the car barefoot, your heels abandoned in the backseat, you make your way to his side, opening the door.

“Come on. Can you walk?”

Satoru nods, lazily unbuckling his seatbelt and swinging his legs out into the open air. You wait outside the car as he lingers, half in, half out.

“Mm... you're looking real pretty, you know?” He remarks, causing you to roll your eyes, though a smile tugs at your lips.

“Stop that,” you giggle, feeling bashful under his gaze. You remind yourself he's still intoxicated, which somewhat explains his behavior.

What catches you off guard is when his hands find their way to your legs, fingers trailing subtly over the back of your thighs. You almost gasp at the unexpected touch, his innocent gaze meeting yours.

“Stop what?”

His slender fingers tug at the hem of your short dress. “This has been bothering me the whole night, you know? Standing in my way.”

“Satoru, you're drunk. Let's get you inside and—”

“Can't you feel it?” A frown mars his pink lips. “Are you that clueless? I've been trying to get with you for so long.”

Your eyes widen, cheeks flushing with heat. You remind yourself that he doesn’t mean it. Heck, he probably doesn’t even know what he’s saying. So, you open your mouth to respond, but he interrupts by pushing himself up and out of the door, causing you to stumble backward.

“So?” Warmth seeps into the small of your back, his fingers tapping against the fabric of your dress.

You weigh the situation carefully. It's a tempting opportunity, one you've secretly hoped for, yet it doesn't feel right. Despite Satoru's partial sobriety, it's clear that proceeding would be a mistake.

“Satoru,” you murmur, taking a step back to create some semblance of space between you. “We'll discuss this when you're sober, okay?”

Fortunately, the awkwardness doesn't linger as he quickly drifts back into slumber.

By the next morning, Satoru recalls nothing of the previous night's events. He's back to his usual self, waking you with a coffee and no questions asked about why you're still there. It's endearing, in its own way, despite his loud and sometimes obnoxious demeanor. You've known Satoru for so long that you've weathered worse.

“Did you sleep well?” he asks as you return from the bathroom, clad in his oversized T-shirt and shorts. He doesn't mind; in fact, he seems to relish the sight, finding comfort in your relaxed appearance.

“Yeah…” you yawn, covering your mouth with one hand while grabbing the warm mug with the other. “Couldn't leave this morning because someone had a bit too much to drink.”

“Oh, please, I know you're just using that as an excuse to stay with me,” he teases, smirking as you shoot him a glare. “It's obvious.”

“Aren’t you cocky?” you retort, bringing the coffee to your lips. The brew is exactly to your liking, a detail Satoru always remembers. “You were so whiny last night, I swear. I should've brought Sugu’ along instead.”

“You wouldn't have,” he insists, persistent in his belief that you wanted to be with him, even when the night didn't unfold as planned. “Who could resist going clubbing with me? It's the ultimate experience. A million girls wish they had the chance.”

“I know, they were all over you,” you remark casually, setting your coffee down on the table in his spacious living room, fingers absentmindedly fixing your hair. He's taken aback by your words, vividly recalling the night's details. “You were such a whore. Every girl grinded on your dick. What an accomplishment.”

A hint of unease crosses his features. It hadn't occurred to him that he'd been dancing with other women while you were there with him. And if he was with other girls... what were you doing?

His thoughts are interrupted by your sudden burst of laughter at his expression, likening him to a sad puppy. “Oh god, your face,” you laugh, wiping away tears. “Relax, it was just a joke.”

Gojo scoffs, feigning nonchalance as he looks away in embarrassment. “I knew it was a joke,” he retorts defensively.

“Of course you did,” you scoff, rolling your eyes playfully.

“What else did I do last night?” Satoru's voice carries a hint of hesitation, embarrassed by his actions. “Did I say anything weird?”

Your breath catches in your throat, a pang of anxiety coursing through you as he seems almost convinced of his own folly. You silently pray he doesn't remember; there's no need to make things awkward for both of you.

“No?” You quirk a brow, “You just slept. You snore fucking loudly, by the way.”

He studies your face and you feign indifference, though the awkwardness hangs palpably in the air around you. He doesn't remember, you silently implore.

“So rude,” he tsks his tongue. The tension in the air dissipates as he teases you about your comment, and you both share a laugh, the momentary awkwardness melting away. He stands up, leaving you with a mixture of relief and amusement at the exchange.

You relieve the longest breath, one you didn’t realize you were holding. 

You're relieved that he's forgotten the events of the night, unwilling to broach the subject in case his words were not genuine, merely fueled by alcohol. Yet, a small, twisted part of you wishes you had accepted his offer last night, even as you despise yourself for such thoughts. He would have regretted it, you reason. Who knows where your friendship would stand if you had acted on such primal urges. You remind yourself that you're not some animal; you can control yourself.

Despite your initial intention to leave by nightfall, you know deep down that you'll end up spending the night at his place again. It's a pattern that seems inevitable.

The day went by fast, and before you know it it’s already dinner time. Satoru stepped into the living room, where you’ve been unproductively lying down for what seemed to be hours on end. “Do you wanna go out to eat?”

“Hmm?” You look up from the phone, turning to face him in a position similar to a cat’s. “I don’t have anything to wear. Can we just order something instead?”

Satoru hums, walking towards the couch you lay on. With a huff you sit up, giving him space to slump himself manspread next to you. “I’m fucking starving”

“Where’s your cook?” You giggle. For a grown man, your blue-eyed friend’s cooking skills are less than average. With some luck, he can make scrambled eggs. Not that he ever needed to, his cook used to be a chef in a big restaurant. Considering the kind of money Satoru has, you’re guessing he left his job for a better opportunity; cooking meals for a single man. “Did he run away? Can’t blame him.”

Satoru shoots you a glare, containing his smile. “He opened a restaurant and left.”

“So he ran away,” You confirm, leaning your face dangerously close, “couldn’t handle you.”

“Are you implying I’m too much to handle?” he mimics your movement, nearly breathing in your face.

“You know I’m right,” you’re trying your best to stay put, but the way your breath hitches at the proximity does not help. You can only pray the heat you feel creeping on your face is not obvious on the out.

“You wanna put that theory to the test?” He quirks a brow, white lashes fluttering in the form of blinks and you’re nearly convinced he’s trying to charm you. “You know, handling someone comes in many forms.”

You cringe at his words, scoffing and turning away to hide your embarrassment. 

Satoru boo’s at you, “coward. You’re so boring.” 

“You’re so eager,” You retort, standing up and stretching your back, trying to keep space before you lose all form of restraint.

“Oh no you don’t,” You hear. Before you react you're pulled back to the couch. A gasp erupts from you when you fall onto the cushion, body too close to his own.

Heat rises, and silence falls. It’s not awkward, no. Just… tense. 

“You’re a terrible liar, you know?” He mutters, voice so sultry it makes your heart drop. It’s such a drastic change from his previous teasing manner. Although that stupid smirk remains. 

“I don’t know what you’re talking about,” your voice comes out a whisper, a lot softer than you expect it to, surprising both you and him. You want to push him off you, tell him you’re best friends and this isn’t heading in the right direction. But you’re too old to care, too desperate to care. You’ve been waiting for this moment for so long now. You can’t lose it again.

“You do,” He isn’t taking arguments. “I remember last night very clearly actually…”

One finger tips over the exposed skin of your knee and up, whatever the shorts you wear leave out, tantalizing you and sending shivers down your spine. You gulp, eyes widening. He remembers..? 

“I’m surprised you didn’t take your chance,” he hums, looking down at where his finger meets with your skin. “So… wasteful.”

“What do you suggest I have done?” You tilt your head to meet his eyes, emboldened. 

His eyes meet yours, lips parted for a second, almost curious. “Allow me to demonstrate.”

Before you can change your mind, his mouth closes upon yours. He doesn’t give you time to process the situation, tongue invading your mouth while his hands take the chance to wrap around your middle.

Your hands find place on his shoulder, colder fingers rushing to the buttons of his shirt. He nearly bites your tongue, muscles dancing in no particular rhythm. He tastes like mint and lust. Exactly how you imagined he would.

He pulls away with a heavy breath when his shirt is unbuttoned. “Did you call me eager?”

“You’re so much sexier with your mouth shut,” you huff, feeling his palms sneak past the waistband of the shorts. 

“You hurt me, you know?” Satoru chuckles, one warm hand finding your jaw to bring your focus back to his face instead of the shit he wore. “Keep your eyes on mine, hm?”

There’s an effect he has on you, bringing out primal needs you thought you had buried well. “Or what?”

He brings down the shorts in one fast movement, earning a yelp from you. He chuckles, looking down at the thong you’d worn last night. “Came prepared, huh? How cute.”

Rolling your eyes, you move to straddle him. “You think you’re so funny–”

“I am,” He interrupts, groping the flesh of your ass. “That’s what got me here.”

You don’t care to deny his words, kissing him like you’re starved. You feel his cock harden against you, arousal evident by the way he groans into his lips.

His hands roam your body freely while his mouth explores the warmth of your mouth. He traces the edge of your bra, teasing the skin acing to be touched. He’s been waiting for this for very long now; to taste you, to feel you, to have you. It’s his goal, and he’s finally getting there.

“Fuck- Satoru,” You breathe. He watches your face, the string of saliva connecting you to him. He’s seen your face in dreams, but it didn’t look this good. He feels the adrenaline rush at the thought that this is caused by him. He is making you look like that. This is all for him.

“Yeah?” He asks, lifting the shirt over your head.

“I need it,” there’s despair in your voice. He feels a need to satisfy it. He plans to, at least. “Please.”

“So needy,” he smiles as you unzip his pants, pulling his hardened cock out of the boxers. “No prep?”

“Can’t,” You answer mindlessly, too focused on pumping your hand over the glorious length. He’s beautiful down there, making a part of you wish you’d done this earlier. But you don’t dwell on it, too enamored by his leaking tip. 

He grunts, biting his lip and throwing his head back. You watch his reaction, propping yourself on your knees. “Can I put it in, ‘toru?”

He huffs, looking at you with half-lidded eyes. “What are you waiting for?” his fingers run down from your waist to your hips, slowly drawing towards your thong. You hiss a breath when he slips his thumb under the fabric, feeling your heat before pushing the cloth to the side. “Go ahead.”

Your hips lower, feeling his tip against your fold. Your movement is slow, a little too slow for his liking. Satoru is no patient man, his grip on your hips tightens, pulling you down with force.

A loud moon escapes you at the suddenness, walls struggling to accommodate the vast stretch. It feels bigger than it looks, you realize, chest heaving under the pressure. You forgot to get a condom, but that’s the last thing on your mind right now. Nails dig into his shoulder, pushing your head against his chest to take a breath.

“Fuh-fuck,” You hiss, “too big.” 

Satoru hums, running his hands over your skin to coax you. “Can’t do it?”

“I–I can,” you grit your teeth. He finds a way to be a pest even with a pussy to shut him up. So you lift your hips, as if to prove your point, moving them slowly at first.

“O-ah–” He shuts his eyes, focused on the ecstatic feeling of your insides squeezing him, swallowing him whole. It’s better than his hands, better than any other girl he’s fucked to pass time. In a way, it’s so… you.

You do your best to maintain pace, to not become too fast just yet. You know you’d orgasm too early if you did, but he feels too good not to.

“Oh, fuck, s’tight,” his jaw clenches as his hands move to unclasp the bra, allowing your breasts freedom. Satoru looks at you, body begging to be adorned. To be worshipped. It’s what you deserve, so his hands rest on your hips as he brings his mouth to your chest, bringing you closer for a taste.

He starts with a little lick to your nipple, earning him yet another loud whine. You’re too cute like that. One set of fingers finds your other breast, fondling it with care. Your senses tingle, making you breathe harder and move sloppier, looking to feel his tip hit a certain spot you’re yet to locate.

Satoru grunts, mouth latching into your hardened nipple, sucking on the sensitive skin. Arms cage his head, giving him better access.

“Fuck– ‘toru…” your whines are a prayer, moving faster around him. His length stretches you so well that you feel him against all the right places, massaging your insides so well you need to cover your mouth to stop the loud noises. Yet you see stars when you feel it, a moan you’re unable to control running freely out of your mouth. You know the maids can hear it, mauve even walked across the room without you noticing. But it doesn’t matter, they wouldn’t dare bring it up.

“Yeah,” His breath comes out strained, pinching your nipple before moving to suck the other one. “Just like that, keep moving for me, baby. I–fuck—I know you’re close”

“So good,” you whine, vision blurring as you huff and puff. “So good, ‘toru–!”

Your confession of ecstasy makes him feel his edge coming closer, yearning for release.

Lewd sounds of squelching and moans roam the room unsolicited; you no longer able to control yourself, and Satoru not wanting you to.

You tug at his hair, moaning pronographically. Your hips nearly buckle at the friction but you’re too busy chasing your high to notice, moving like your life depends on it. The knot in your stomach feels too fragile, too ready to let go.

When Satoru feels the way your hips tire, he puts his hands to work, gently guiding them up on his cock before slamming you back down with an aggressive motion.

You nearly scream, eyes widening as the knot you felt suddenly exploding. Your eyes widen as your neck cranes back, pussy tightening around him all at once then letting go. You twitch around him, clenching and unclenching around his length to the point where he can barely hold it anymore.

“I’m gonna– shit I’m gonna come,” He groans, teeth sinking into the skin of your nipple, the sudden stimulation making you jerk.

“Inside,” You moan, “please ‘toru– i want you to come inside.”

As if on cue, his cock twitches and he releases white ropes into your walls, filling you up with warmth. Your eyes roll back, too much ecstasy.

You ride out your high, coming out longer than you expected. When you’re done, you slump onto him. You don’t recall ever being this worn from one orgasm.

Satoru relaxes into the couch, head thrown back and thoughts empty.

Your breath comes hot against the sweaty skin of his neck. You lick your lips, suddenly thirsty.

“You good?” He whispers, almost afraid if he were too loud he’d ruin the serenity that’s fallen over you. 

“Mhm,” you hum, not yet moving off his length.

“Again?” He asks after a few seconds of silence. You hear that smirk in his voice. 

You giggle in response, pushing yourself up. He’s out of you with a ‘pop!’ and a soft groan. You huddle to the other side of the couch, trying to catch your breath. “Give me a second.”

“Can’t handle me?” He challenges, and you’re urged to move back and ride him until he passes out. Maybe you will, but you need a break. 

“You’re insufferable,” You groan in response, reaching for the half-empty cup of water you’ve previously set on the table. 

“Please,” he rolls his eyes. “You love it.”

[lvndosnorris]

hii! do u think u could write a little something for charles where he accidentally starts speaking in french mid sex, but u have no idea what he’s saying so u have to occasionally let him know cause the pleasure just gets too much for him and his brain can’t process anything

oh i love this — my first charles req too! i did have to translate some bits because my french is diabolical but hopefully it's okay!

charles' whimpers were becoming more and more hoarse; barely coherent as you cupped the side of his face, stroking the corner of his mouth with your thumb as you stilled your movements. much to the dismay of your boyfriend, his eyes shooting open and eyebrows furrowing in confusion as he stared curiously at you. the pleasure had stilled, only slightly though as you clenched around him instinctively.

hands on your hips he pushed down, desperate for you to quit your stupid little games and carry on riding him — and it somewhat worked. your cunt fluttering around his length as you finally lifted your hips before rocking back down again, continuing the self-indulgence with a soft moan.

this wasn't planned: your clothes strewn in the corner of the sitting room, your thighs either side of charles' as you bounced languidly, taking your time to tighten the all-too familiar knot that had formed in the pit of your stomach. charles' lids were heavy, swollen lips parted as he mumbled over and over, each word punctuated with a whine that you could only describe as desperate.

"mon ange— fait du bien—" spilling from his tongue as he pinched the flesh of your waist, palms soothing over the area as he half-arsed attempted to meet your thrusts halfway. head thrown back you watched the way his adam's apple bobbed in his throat as he swallowed back his noises, brain completely fuzzy at how tight you were, how warm.

you'd be lying if you said you understood him completely — too busy feeling your limbs go numb at the sound of your boyfriend as you slammed down on him with a little more force. you could feel your orgasm teetering, charles' little "j'ai besoin de toi" and "tu es si bon avec moi" falling on deaf ears as you pressed your forehead to his.

"i need to know what you're saying pretty boy," you whispered, lips ghosting his as you pushed yourself back. the new angle earned a filthy moan from your throat, a wave of pleasure cursing through your veins as he studied you through a darkened vision. but he couldn't stop himself — thoughts not even cohesive, fingers harsh as they dug deeper at the small of your back. almost dragging you up and down his cock in search of his own orgasm, completely oblivious to the words that were spilling from him.

* mon ange - my angel

** fait du bien - so good

*** j'ai besoin de toi - i need you

**** tu es si bon avec moi - you're so good to me

[gloufiz]

Okay...

I need people to hear me out on this one:

Garroth and Nicole in a cringe-fail political marriage!

Stay with me here! I promise I'm only a little crazy.

Alright, now that I've at least somewhat captured your attention... let me explain myself!

This concept sprang up from the idea of: What if Nicole and Garroth didn't run away from their arranged marriage?

As is described in MCD, the reason why we meet both Garroth and Nicole is because they were running from the marriage that was being forced upon them by their fathers. This marriage was supposed to broker peace between Scaleswind and O'Khasis and strengthen their bond. The idea of having to do this though, deeply disturbed Nicole and Garroth, which is why they both fled prior to the arrangement. This is the beginning to many events in cannon.

Now, in this thought experiment, that doesn't happen. Garroth and Nicole, despite their desires to not get married, also seem like the type that would care about their people deeply, so it isn't too farfetched to think that they could be persuaded to stay in order to protect their people. The pair wouldn't be thrilled about it, obviously, but they would go through with it, albeit begrudgingly. Then the two would stay in O'Khasis instead of running off to Phoenix Drop.

In their union, Scaleswind and O'Khasis would become a force to be reckoned with, and hopefully a little less corrupt with Zane's influence being reduced in Garroth's presence. Garroth and Nicole would put up a front in for the public that they enjoyed being married, though in private they would get on each other's nerves.

Romantically, they are not compatible, but they eventually carve out a mutual respect and become friends. It takes a lot of arguments and coming to terms with the situation, but they make do. So, when Garte puts Garroth in charge of the Jury of Nine a little later to provide him with some "leadership experience," Garroth turns to Nicole for help.

She winds up helping him run the Jury, even advising to have Zane help to reduce some of the sting of Garte's favoritism. They keep the Jury on a more morally correct path, though Zane is still allowed to run around and search for relics with the Jury, which is what eventually leads the group to meeting Aphmau.

Unfortunately, the tone of the meeting probably wouldn't be the most friendly with Zane involved, but that's neither here nor there!

Anyway, this is just some thoughts I've had as I pondered an AU where Garroth stays behind in O'Khasis! I hope this is coherent, though I will probably word barf about this again at some other point in time... as is the life of someone who has been bit by the MCD virus for 10 years...

TL;DR:

Garroth and Nicole stayed instead of fleeing from their arranged marriage and they deal with it with a few minor hiccups.

[shouldhavebeenpersephone]

In GTN chapter 36, Cytherea says “None of you have learned how to die gracefully. I learned over 10,000 years ago"

Do you know/have a theory as to how Cyth could have learned anything pre-resurrection? She was not one of the original lyctors present for the resurrection and it was only 10,000 years ago. It could be hyperbole but I am suspicious of the “over 10,000 years”.

Thank you so much for the ask! I wanted to take my time with it, I hope you didn't mind the wait.

I actually had been chewing on this with my most recent GtN reread. Bear with me as I cut and paste all the pieces that form my thoughts on this - hopefully it's somewhat coherent to read.

Could "over 10000 years" be a hyperbole? Maybe. A lot of characters tell the 'truth' as far as they believe it to be so even if it's factually incorrect. I don't think, however, that Tamsyn would make Cytherea say it in this specific way if it was a hyperbole. In GtN chapter 35 where Palamedes confronts Cytherea we get the following lines, which are what feed my intuition about this:

"Don't lie to me, please."

Dulcinea said, "I have never lied to any of you."

Cytherea has no reason to lie, especially not after being confronted by Palamedes. She tells him herself - she has been giving pieces of the truth and using those to manipulate the narrative. Because of this and because it's much more fun if it isn't a hyperbole I see no point to dismiss it as an emotional inaccuracy.

So let's say she is over 10,000 years old. How does that work?

First thing I went looking for while trying to figure this out was the question of Cytherea's birth. On the fandom wiki, it states that Cytherea was born into the established Seventh. I have been combing through the books, and I cannot find anything in canon that truly confirms this. What we do know of the timeline and her age is the following from HtN chapter 9:

"When they first brought her to Canaan House, I thought there'd been some mistake. - She was just shy of thirty then, I recall. -

-Was she the first gen, or second?"

"Second," said God. "Early second. We were still experimenting with getting the Sixth installation up and running. Some of the Houses were empty."

Mercymorn spoke up: "No. We had it running by then. Because Valancy was with us, and Anastasia."

-"Yes, you're right. We were all there to meet her. All sixteen of us -

'Some of the houses were empty' is the important line here, because in NtN John 5:4 Harrow describes how the resurrection happened:

-You resurrected some of them. You wake up fewer still. You start out with a few thousand, then, later, some hundred thousand, then millions, but never more than millions. You teach them how to live all over again. You teach yourself. -

The houses are named in order of resurrection. The Seventh, then, comes after the Sixth, which should make it obvious that by the time Cytherea arrived the Sixth was already established - or the Seventh wouldn't have existed. Yet, for some reason, for John this is not as obvious. I have found what could be an explanation in HtN chapter 2:

He said, "No. I haven't truly resurrected anyone in ten thousand years. But at that time... I set many aside, for safety... and I've often felt bad about just keeping them as insurance. They've been asleep all this myriad, Harrow, -

The difference wouldn't be as obvious to John, because he didn't resurrect the houses one by one. He resurrected a chunk of the earth's population, kept them dormant, and piece by piece woke them up to populate the houses. Beyond the fact that Cytherea is never said to have been born on the Seventh in canon (again, to my knowledge - please correct me if I missed it), the following from HtN chapter 2 really seals the deal in my eyes that she was not born on the Seventh but rather woken up for the Seventh.

The emperor said gently, "She needs to go home, Harrow."

"That was never her home," he said.

You did not look. "And will the Seventh House accept her?"

I also considered John might feel Cytherea belongs at home with the other Lyctors and therefore denies that the Seventh is her home, but then remembered the following from the same chapter:

He said, "No Lyctor has ever returned home, once we understood the reprecussions... no Lyctor except one, who knew I would come to intercept her for that very reason."

He is talking about how Harrow cannot go home to the Ninth, and referring to Cytherea going home by returning to Canaan house located on earth. John also talks about the kind of people he resurrected in NtN John 5:4:

-We'll get them all back... some of them, anyway... or at least, the ones I want to bring back. Anyone I feel didn't do it. Anyone I feel had no part in it. Anyone I can look at the face of and forgive. -

Part of the same chapter I included above in combination with this one make me itchy almost. Harrow says 'You teach them how to live all over again.' That almost feels like it should be people who recently learned how to live. Like John only resurrected kids.

Think about it. He resurrects his loved ones and ones he can forgive. People who did not take part in the destruction of earth in his eyes. Who other than children could he really be talking about? Children, babies, who have no power to decide or influence to exert, who - even if they did have the power - do not have the capacity to understand the consequences of their actions. Whose memories will be easiest to erase because there is so little to begin with.

It then also makes sense why there were two generations of Lyctors. The population he woke up had to grow up into adults first. Why else would he have half a band of Lyctors trying to settle all of the Houses? If he was able to pick adults worthy of resurrection, he would have been able to pick adults capable of establishing his houses and becoming his hands and gestures.

One final point that drives this home is the following from the very beginning of GtN in chapter 7 when Teacher tells the Ninth about Dulcinea's condition:

"Dulcinea Septimus was not meant to live to twenty-five,"-

Dulcinea's hereditary disease is the same as Cytherea's. John did not know she was sick when she first was brought to Canaan house, which means that when he resurrected her, she must have been young enough to not be actively dying yet. Perhaps a toddler or a child who had been sick for some time - long enough to know what it feels like to slowly be dying.

So, all in all, my answer is that Cytherea was not born on the Seventh. I am not sure where the idea that the second generation was born on their planets of origin came from, but I honestly doubt any of them were born instead of woken. Cytherea claiming to have learned something 10,000 years ago would be a great way for Tamsyn to give us just enough to figure it out - this is, after all, the same author who gave us the big reveal of the second book in the first sentence of the first book of her series.

[rosettyller]

How the minisodes/flashbacks serve to inform Aziraphale and Crowley's frames of mind, and their decisions in 2x06: a meta

part 1: victorian minisode [tag]

I'm sure other people have talked about this a lot, and I did touch on this in my meta here, but all the same, I'd like to sit down and actually get all my thoughts on the matter out somewhat coherently.

I think some people have had some difficulty accepting Aziraphale's decision at the end of 2x06, so it's really a good thing that these flashbacks - which appear to be all from aziraphale's point of view - were including, as they provide a lot of context to aziraphale and crowley's relationship, and why they chose what they did.

The minisode begins right after the intro; before the intro, we have Muriel visiting Aziraphale (and Crowley) to spy on them.

(Please excuse Muriel's blink here, kmplayer was being a nightmare)

It's already been pointed out by many people how this is basically the same as police spying on / targeting queer people, which is again reinforced in the 1941 minisode.

But it brings to the forefront of Aziraphale's mind Heaven and Hell's surveillance of them, which is quite explicit in the Victorian minisode.

Beginning with Aziraphale's bookshop and shots of his diary establishes it is his flashback.

Crowley and Aziraphale are meeting up for a date casual meeting. There's no pretence of business, not even the Arrangement. They're beginning to feel safe(r) in their relationship - it's been almost 6 000 years, and they haven't been caught.

(more under the cut)

This minisode is more focused around morals, and it's set up straight away:

Elspeth wants to keep herself and her partner alive. If she doesn't do this, they're dead, and she's not actually hurting anyone.

Crowley likes causing a bit of trouble, and furthermore, he understands her position. He doesn't agree with the Don't Do This Because God Said So, and sees a) a person not hurting anyone, but doing what they can to survive and b) someone willing to do anything to save someone they love

Aziraphale still thinks like an angel; God decides what is Good, and Bad, and God decided graverobbing is Bad. But Aziraphale isn't saying "stop doing this, you're going to hell because you're bad", he's saying "stop doing this, if you continue you're going to hell, because it's against God's will." he still thinks she can be redeemed.

Throughout this minisode, Aziraphale has big Main Character Energy (and Crowley had big Love Interest Energy), challenging Aziraphale's morals that he learnt from Heaven.

As is the case with all the couples in Good Omens, Elspeth/Morag parallel Crowley/Aziraphale. Morag worries about Elspeth being condemned to hell, just as Aziraphale did.

Crowley and Aziraphale have their conversation straight from the books, about people who are poor having more opportunities to be good.

Apparanently, some people are saying this is OOC for Aziraphale, but I disagree. I think it sounds like exactly the kind of thing Heaven has said, over and over again, something Aziraphale believes because Heaven is Good, and because he wants to believe it, that those who are impoverished have a chance. (I had anther thought here, but I've forgotten it. Hopefully it'll come back to me.)

[Brief cut to Aziraphale & the yellow Bentley, Crowley's matchmaking attempt, then back to the minisode.]

Aziraphale miracles the corpse, in an attempt to prevent Elspeth from sin. However, this means she loses money that would help keep her and Morag alive. We can see from Crowley's glare here that he's not impressed - that Aziraphale would take away Elspeth's choice to risk hell to keep herself and Morag alive.

Aziraphale, Crowley and Dalrymple have a conversation in which Dalrymple explains he's doing it to help people, and Aziraphale starts coming around to his point of view, running out of reasons to argue with it.

Look at Aziraphale's face when he finds out the tumour was a seven year old boy's, and that he died. He's horrified, and then he looks like he's about to cry. (Not screencapped here, but he glances in Crowley's direction, and Up)

His hands are shaking when he hugs the jar to his chest.

Dalrymple reinforces again he's just trying to save lives, and then:

Aziraphale looks down, thinking over what he said, thinking about the dead boy.

[Back to present, Aziraphale arrives in Edinburgh.]

Aziraphale is delighted by his revelation, and shares with Elspeth that it's alright now, because it alleviates human suffering.

In voiceover/diary, Aziraphale states, "Having realised the error of my ways, I resolved to assist Elspeth and wee Morag in their noble quest to decrease human suffering."

This reflects Aziraphale's rather black-and-white view of the world; they're no longer sinners, but heroes, rather than just two girls trying to survive.

When the watch is alerted, Aziraphale opens a tomb to help them shelter. He's committed.

Crowley sends the watchmen down a hole. Rather more severe than Aziraphale's reaction.

Morag dies while Aziraphale is busy giving a big speech on how he's going to save her.

I've spent a lot of time thinking about the purpose of this (not Morag's death itself). The only conclusion I've arrived at is it's making a point about how even if you have a Realisation, and you change your mind and your morals, that doesn't undo the hurt you've done in the past. But I don't really like that.

Upon the suggestion of Elspeth taking Morag's body to Dalrymple, Aziraphale is horrified.

Note how Crowley is in the dark, Aziraphale in the light, while Crowley is the devil on Aziraphale's shoulder, whispering in his ear.

This challenges Aziraphale's newfound Realisation, bringing it closer to home.

(Crowley spends a lot of this minisode lurking in the dark behind Aziraphale's shoulder)

Crowley is decidedly less active in this minisode than Aziraphale, but here he goes big (literally), and saves Elspeth from suicide. Not Aziraphale, the angel.

Crowley brings up sinning again, and suggests to Aziraphale that he give his money to Elspeth, as it's what she needs to live a good life. (Aziraphale's stil a bit iffy at first, but he gives it)

I think this reflects, to an extent, Aziraphale's lack of initiative - he doesn't do things (or isn't supposed to) without Heaven telling him to. Such as the way they limit his miracles. He's not able to see a person suffering, and miraculously fix their life. And while Crowley is watched, and restricted, Hell certainly don't complain when he comes up with the brilliant plan on his own that secures them lots of souls (eg. Spanish Inquisition, French Revolution).

And then we have the lovely moment, Aziraphale reaching for Crowley and guiding him, Crowley saying, "Where are you?"

Aziraphale's hands on Crowley's hips - they do physical contact now

Their positioning is reminiscent of the Wall Slam scene.

And we know Crowley didn't have to drink it - he could have miracled it away, poured it on the floor, whatever. And it definitely did affect him, and yes it was funny, but Crowley's dialogue here reinforces why he did this: Hell is watching.

(and now here's the part where I actually get to the point of this meta. in case you've forgotten, it's how the minisodes provide context for the Final Fifteen)

Heaven and Hell are watching Aziraphale and Crowley - we know it's constant, if not always active, from the Earth Observation Files photos of them together in S1.

And Crowley is aware of this - has he been caught before? Anyway, he has an excuse (that can be verified) all ready to go if he's recalled to Hell.

(I also think it's a bit of a defence - in the Wall Slam scene as well - because Crowley disagrees with Heaven's definition of Good)

When Crowley gets dragged to Hell, Aziraphale is left alone in the cold, dark graveyard.

His voiceover, "And that was the last I was to see of Crowley for quite some time," reflects that this diary entry is written some time after Crowley was taken, and they've since met up again. This means Aziraphale has had a long time to (over)think about what was done to him.

What Aziraphale sees is, Crowley is good. He does good things. And when he does good things, he needs to disguise it so he can excuse it to Hell. And when he fails in that, he is punished by Hell.

Why wouldn't Aziraphale want Crowley back in the fixed Heaven? Where he can help people in safety, without fear of punishment?

And if he can learn, why can't the other angels?

[autumnwhistles]

Introducing Last Life SMP: The Unofficial Musical

“There is an old, old tale to be told

Of green like the spruce, of crimson and gold.”

[Full song list and links under the cut]

NOTE: AUDITIONS ARE OPEN UNTIL NOV 20TH!!!! If you're interested, please check out the #auditions and #info tags for more information.

Those are the first lines sung (...kind of) in a musical adaption of the Last Life SMP I’ve decided to talk myself to write, for... some reason. Please note this is not an actual play and never will be (rights and crediting issues, for one thing, the CCs deserve to take credit for the storyline they’ve made), but I will record, put it together, and upload songs to Youtube in a playlist. Most of the plot is from Last Life itself, and is stated in the songs, so it should be easy enough to follow. There will also be the relevant plot in the description of each song.

My aim is to tell a coherent story through songs (which, because I can’t hold myself back, I’ve planned 45 of...), meaning that I can’t just jump perspectives continuously and chronicle events. This means that some of the CC’s characters are going to have a bigger role than others, though I do want to honour everyone involved, so I’d appreciate any ideas on doing this (especially for Tango and Skizz). However, so far:

It mainly follows Martyn (especially due to his lore, he had the easiest storyline to adapt into a narrative setting, and to me at least was the main character of that season), partially following Scott as the winner as well. They do foil each other quite well this season, which is a bonus – though I am going to be stretching this for the sake of Cohesion^TM.

Important events and important exposition are given to us by the Chorus, keeping the storyline in tact while shifting focuses (Joel going Red, for example). The Chorus are actually Watchers observing the events, which is hinted in the opening song (they sing a lot of references to Martyn’s Last Life teaser, for instance).

This means that Watchers and Listeners are technically canon (especially since we’re following Martyn’s lore), but the names aren’t going to be stated so things can be interpreted differently for people who don’t keep track of/aren’t fans of that. 

Memories of 3rd Life are also canon, as they are in the series.

This follows the headcanon (and out-of-universe truth) that 3rd Life took place in Spring and Last Life in Autumn, so if there are references to that in songs (which they are), that’s why.

Also, though I’ve tried to keep everything as faithful to the events of Last Life as possible (except one confrontation/song that doesn’t happen, to resolve various things), but I do tweak some minor chronological aspects (eg when alliances were established) and omit some things  again for cohesion, and also to help establish information early on.

Progress-wise first song is nearly finished, though I do still need to record it. I have pretty concrete ideas for others, and some I don’t really know yet, but hopefully they’ll be coming out at a steady, if slow, pace. I am somewhat a novice at music production (as in recording and putting tracks together) though, so help with that would be appreciated.

*if you’re not convinced, watch the start of his session 8 until 1:57, he canonically hallucinates his friends and this is due to a sinister entity only he can hear speaking to him and commanding him to follow it even somewhat despite his will, manipulated by promises of bringing back these dead friends. And all this is in his episodes. Main character behaviour, guys. Main character behaviour.

Full song list:

Part 1:

1. Overture/Middle of Nowhere: We’re introduced to the Last Life world by the Chorus as players spawn in. Martyn seems to hear something, but brushes it off.

2. Corners of the World: Through Martyn’s perspective we’re introduced to players and their alliances. He meets Scott and Pearl and chats to them for a while, before heading with them to spawn.

3. “Tales: Record 13″/”The Boogeyman”: At spawn, Grian narrates his experience with BDubs’ Boogeyman curse, and all around the map the players express what they’ve heard about the Boogeyman curse themselves.

4. “A(ha)lliances”: The Southlands ally, making a-ha jokes, and Pearl and Scott solidify their alliance via Pearl gifting Scott a life.

5. “The Table Song 1″: Now some time into the series, the Chorus updates us on the alliances that have formed: the Fairy Fort, Team BEST, Magical Mountain, Scott and Pearl, and the Southlands. It also chronicles the journey of the Enchanting Table, now in Magical Mountain, and the Southlands’ trip to enchant which ends with Scar’s Boogeyman kill.

6. “Our Will Be Done (Precursor 1)”: Martyn hears a mysterious voice speaking to him for the first time, telling him to give Ren some Nether Wart. He does so.

7. “Debts (potentially an instrumental)”: Martyn extinguishes Ren’s burning tower and Ren tells him of his alliance and pledge to Lizzie, reminding him of his time in 3rd Life.

8. “In Spring We Met”: After returning to the Southlands, Martyn thinks about the conflicting loyalties he feels between the Southlands and the remaining ties he feels to Ren, despite it being a new life. As he falls asleep, the voice whispers to him about betraying the Southlands and forming an alliance with Ren to suit its own goals.

9. “Green, Crimson, Gold”: Joel is now Red after an unlucky session, and news of a Red name spreads throughout the server.

10. “The Table Song 2″*: The journey of the Enchanting Table is further chronicled, coming into Scott and Pearl’s possession, who then sell it to Lizzie for a life each, putting Scott up to the same number of lives as Martyn, 4.

11. “Their Dubious Game”: Scott wonders about how trustworthy the rules of the game actually are, prompted by the forced isolation of Red names this time due to their nature contradicting his experiences in 3rd Life with Jimmy, while Martyn, breaching the border with the Southlands, hesitantly wonders the same thing. 

12. “Northern Lament”: Below Magical Mountain, Joel fumes at being distrusted by everyone and isolated purely due to his Red name. Above, Scar muses about being isolated and distrusted for the opposite reason, because of how many lives he has.

13. “A(ha)alliances (Reprise)”: Time passes, and Martyn grows closer to the Southlands. However, he’s still meeting up with Ren who offers to introduce him to Lizzie and the rest of the Fairy Fort, potentially considering a betrayal. The Voice prompts him to accept this, as they can be useful in its plan.

14. “unnamed Wither theme (Instrumental)”: Grian informs the Southlands that Scott and Pearl are in possession of a Wither Skull, expressing his desire to retrieve it. Martyn, Impulse and Mumbo go, Martyn however intending to eventually destroy it because of how unprepared everyone is for a Wither fight.

15. Unnamed Song: After they’re found out by Scott and Impulse and Mumbo flee, Scott informs Martyn that Grian also has a Wither Skull, Martyn immediately gives the skull back, and the two talk about their distrust of Grian and his desire to bring complete chaos to the server. However, that night (post-song) the Voice informs him that its goal is to watch the server burn.

16. “The Table Song 3″: The Chorus further chronicles the Enchanting Table’s journey, now in the Fairy Fort, where two members – Ren and BigB – are chosen as the Boogeyman. Team BEST visits and Bdubs gives a life to Lizzie in exchange, giving enchanting to everyone free of charge. Ren manages to kill a member of Team BEST, Skizz, but BigB has not gotten a kill yet, and the session is nearly over. He catches sight of his closest ally Cleo by the side of Ren’s pit trap.

17. “Green, Crimson, Gold (Reprise)”: Cleo, now Yellow, arrives at Scott and Pearl’s base informing them of BigB’s Boogeyman kill on her, wanting to cut TIES. Scott and Pearl accept (song intro). Meanwhile, Joel is getting desperate for allies, now hunting for Yellows to convert to Red with him. Hearing about Grian’s wither skull, he goes to the Nether, where Grian and Mumbo are building a Ghost farm, and shoots Grian off the edge, turning him Red. BDubs, fighting in the Nether, falls and turns Red too. When heading to Scott and Pearl’s base, a Yellow Cleo is killed by Joel’s trap. 

18. “Friends”: The Southlands are informed of Grian’s death, and, now Red, Grian is to be exiled from the Southlands. He desperately tries to kill Mumbo as Impulse and Jimmy arrive, asking if they can still be friends, while Scott and Pearl mourn the loss of a friendship with Cleo, and Martyn is introduced to the rest of the Shadow Alliance under the gaze of the Moon, giving Ren a life.

Part 2:

1. “Walls”: Grian has been exiled from the Southlands, the stone wall he built separating them. In the Snow Fort, Etho and BDubs build a wall to keep them separate until he can gain a life again. Cleo, wanting vengeance on BigB, meets Scott on the other side of his wall, Scott giving her some sugarcane. Post-song, Grian, Joel and Cleo express their desire to gain lives back from Scar. 

2. “Their Will”: Martyn relays the aims of the Voice, which he now interprets as the Moon, to the rest of the Shadow Alliance, who agree with it.

3. “Die For Me”: In a Shadow Alliance meeting, Martyn asks if there’s anything recent he should know about the Fairy Fort. They tell him the Fairy Fort has burned down at the hands of Cleo, relaying the tale as a flashback (with mainly Cleo singing). 

4. “Promises”/“Coal Mine”: Martyn chases Jimmy, who’s stolen his life in the Southlands life-passing ritual, spurred on by the Voice. He lies to Jimmy, telling him they can run away from the Southlands together if he gives him back his life. Jimmy expresses his worry about potentially being the first out again in the process, as this has happened before and he is very vulnerable as a Yellow, and agrees. Martyn runs back with his life straight after.

5. “The Table Song 4”: Since there are only three of them now, the three remaining Southlanders spend the day together, including sneaking around Team BEST’s snow fort looking for the Enchanting Table and finding a secret entrance. They are caught but let go due to some lies of Martyn’s about their aim, telling them he was simply looking for Ender Pearls.

6. “Unnamed Wither Theme (Song: Precursor)”: During the day, the Southlanders meet Scott, Martyn bringing up the danger of Grian’s Wither Skull as he’s now Red, and they decide to look for it. As Martyn is called away to a Shadow Alliance Meeting, Impulse manages to find it, and entrusts it to Scott. Scott gives it to the Fairy Fort for safekeeping.

7. Unnamed Song: Cleo, now Yellow again, visits Scott and officially joins their alliance. Scott expresses his desire to simply protect his allies and simply live a quiet life in these games, though violence is necessary as a means to this end as he knows the chaos that will ensue.

8. “Tales: The Wizard On The Mountain”: a Yellow Grian rejoins the Southlands, telling them (especially Martyn, as he did not know when this happened due to his absences) how he got a life back from Scar, who’s now Yellow himself. (And yes Grian gets songs where he’s relaying events to others instead of ones of them happening to him because he’s a Watcher hehe, he’s not involved in the action songs he watches)

9. “The Trial of Timmy”: The Southlands hold a trial for Jimmy about whether he should be exiled or stay in. They will anonymously vote their verdict in a book, Grian campaigning for Jimmy to leave, while the others, minus Martyn, campaign for him to stay. When it is time for them to vote, Martyn votes him in.

10. “Our Will Be Done (Precursor 2)”: The Voice is angry at Martyn, asking him why he’s still attached to the Southlands when he wishes to join the Shadow, appearing to him and telling him a demonstration is in order... “Lights extinguish/Begin the Slaughter/Our Will Be Done!”

11. “Unnamed Wither Theme (Instrumental 2)”: Grian manages to gather the three Wither Skulls he needs with the help of Impulse, who wants to stay loyal to his allies and feels regret for taking it with Scott. Martyn, though not active, does not try to stop him, and distracts Team BEST while the other two take it. 

12. “Red, Crimson, Gold (Reprise 2)”: As Grian is distracted by this aim, the other members of the South fall to boogeymen, of which there are six of this session, due to the Voice’s promise. Impulse falls to Yellow at Scott’s hands, and Mumbo and Jimmy both become Red, along with many other players on the server, including Lizzie and once more, Joel.

13. “Friends (Reprise)”: Returning to the Southlands after their mission, Grian, Martyn and Impulse find the South blown up by Mumbo: mourning the loss of the alliance, they mournfully burn the walls in commemoration. Grian and Martyn muse on each other’s untrustworthiness, Impulse remaining loyal to both, as the allyship between Scott, Pearl and Cleo strengthens. Far away, Etho, with Bdubs once again on the other side of the wall, discovers the missing Wither Skull, suspecting the Southlands.

14. Unnamed Song: Martyn and Grian, now the last two Southland members after Impulse is shot by Mumbo in the Nether and becomes Red, mentally comment about their distrust of the other person and about there being something off about them, Martyn due to the Voice’s seeming hatred of Grian and Grian’s apparent apathy to everything apart from causing bloodshed, Grian because he senses something around Martyn (Watcher powers heh) and his relative absence from the Southlands when they were still around, though he does express a wish to protect their last remaining threads of alliance. They express none of this aloud. 

15. “When Will You Learn?, Parts 1 and 2”: Heading back to the Southlands, Grian and Martyn meet Jimmy and Mumbo, who attack them. Grian kills them both, to Martyn’s shock, and shocked himself, tries to defend these actions. All of a sudden, the Voice appears again and a Boogeyman curse strikes Martyn. Prompted by the Voice (seeming to have a specific hatred of Grian) and by vengeance for Mumbo and Jimmy, Martyn immediately moves to kill Grian. He succeeds, but the kill is attributed to Joel, who has sniped him. Exhausted, Martyn managed to kill Tango. When called to another Shadow meeting, he returns to his empty Southlands tower instead.

16. “Unnamed Wither Song (Proper)”: The Wither is raised by Grian and Impulse in Team BEST’s base. Etho wants to run, but Bdubs attacks it, giving him the courage to attack too – however, Bdubs loses a life to it, turning Red once more. The remaining Greens and Yellows flock to fight it as the Reds join in, trying to kill the other players. The Wither is defeated by Etho; Impulse falls to Scott’s hand, dying permanently; Bdubs takes Lizzie’s final life as he was promised a life in exchange for killing a Red; he is shot by Grian as he runs to Etho to inform him of this.

17. Unnamed Song: In the aftermath, Etho mourns BDubs’ death, while Ren mourns his failure to protect his Shadow Queen, even if she was Red.

18. Unnamed Song (and the only one not following ‘canon’ events): With Impulse’s death as a catalyst, Martyn seeks out a Red Grian, proposing a temporary truce for him to explain what's going on. They confront each other about their various actions against the Southlands, and their apparent detachment from it, and talk about their suspicions that the other person knows more than they seem about the nature of the games – as the Voice tries to stop Martyn from inquiring further. Grian says he experiences this alongside his friends as a decision when prompted by Martyn stating he never cared in the first place. He wonders if Martyn would understand the situation due to his position; however, he does not know what Grian is talking about and distrusts him. Angry, Grian leaves, calling Martyn nothing but a follower. Angry, the voices swell around Martyn and he falls asleep.

19. “Our Will Be Done”: Waking up all alone, Martyn hallucinates his friends, before they are revealed as fake, the Voice in their places. He snaps at it, finally asking why they’re doing this. Why are they speaking to him? Why are they hell-bent on killing Grian? What did he mean? Why does he have to follow it when he wants to do the opposite of what they tell him? Who are they – why should he do anything they say? However, they pacify him, promising that if he does what they say, they will bring Impulse, Mumbo and Jimmy back. Martyn concedes.

20. “Scott’s Elegy”: Scott, cursed as the Boogeyman once more makes a decision to surrender himself to the curse instead, as he doesn’t want to kill any more allies with so few lives left in the game.

21. Unnamed Sad Martyn Song: Martyn thinks on Scott’s decision, thinking about what he’d once wanted, everything that’s now impossible as he’s pushed around by the Voices with not enough willpower to say no: he wishes to make choices but cannot, and thinks about Grian’s words. 

22. “Our Will Be Done (Reprise)”: In a meeting of the Greens and Yellows, the Voice tells Martyn to place an End Crystal in the centre as a test for Scott: if he blows it up, he passes, if he doesn’t, he fails. Scott chooses not to, and as Scott turns Red, the voices talking to Martyn become loud and angry, commanding him to kill Scott for disobeying them, yet again promising him the Southlands back if he does. While walking around, Martyn loses his first life to a trap at Grian’s hands.

23. “Boogie Boogie On The Dance Floor”: The Chorus informs us that it is the last day. Pearl is chosen as the Boogeyman, rigging a TNT trap on a disco floor, turning Ren’s red. The others quickly fall to the Reds, including Cleo.

24. “Martyn’s Stand”: Now left as the last Yellow, Martyn decides he is tired of hiding, deciding make a last stand against everyone. At first humming the start of “In Spring We Met” as a comfort, he heads to a mountain and pouring lava down the sides as a beacon for the Reds. However, though he puts up a good fight, he doesn’t manage to take any of them down before dying himself, marking the server entirely Red. 

25. “Battle Royale”: With the Reds having turned on each other, the four survivors – Pearl, Scott, Ren and Martyn – agree to a Battle Royale to decide the victor. Pearl dies early on, prompting Scott to grieve and resolve to win this fight, no matter what it takes. Martyn eventually falls to his own End Crystal. Only Scott and Ren are left, and they fight to the voices of dead players telling them to play the game. After a long fight, Scott manages to kill Ren, partially due to a zombie which he interprets as the world maybe doing something after all for his defiance. He is crowned the winner. However, the Voice does not like this, the Chorus supporting this, and Scott is stricken dead with heavenly lightning.

26. “Plainly Spoken [Epilogue]”: All is silence, and yet Martyn opens his eyes once more, to the Voice and the Chorus, now joined as they are the same entity, informing him how disappointed they are in him, and that he is heading closer and closer to the light. As he asks questions, he is cut off, and they say he will forget all that has happened with them as he and everyone else moves into the next game. Up above, the land is now in the state it was at the start of “Middle of Nowhere”, and they are revealed to be those that run the death loop. 

*This may be later excluded due to not adding much at the moment.

[actual-changeling]

Since you have been the first 'Crowley deserves to have his boundaries' person I have seen in the tags on weeks. What do you think about the talk in the fandom on how Crowley should have accepted going to Heaven 'to do good and stop the Apocalypse' and that 'he also rejected Aziraphale'? It personally gives me the creeps because the narrative makes clear that Heaven is a big white nightmare but the fandom seems to be taking the 'Aziraphale might jot be perfect' thing hard and therefore Heaven is fixable now...

Glad to know I am not alone in my little boundaries corner! I'm always here for discussions about it.

And, oh boy, do I have thoughts on that, let's see if I can get them to be somewhat coherent.

I am going to start this off with a metaphor of sorts and hopefully people will be able to follow along. I'm an older sibling and have a little sister, and we grew up in an incredibly abusive and neglectful household.

When I graduated high school, I moved out for university, which was literally the best thing to ever happen to me - I got away, I was/am free! Now I have to deal with the consequences of all that shit though.

If my sister asked me to come back so I can help her fix our mother (entirely theoretical btw she'd never lol) would it be the right thing to say yes? Should I give up my personal freedom, my life, the healing process I am right in the middle of, to go back to a household that broke me? So I can be trapped with a person that will never change again?

The answer is, of course, no. I feel bad for my sister and I am praying she will be able o move out soon, but me going back would not solve a single fucking thing. See where I'm going with this yet?

Crowley left heaven and landed on earth, which was ultimately good for him, but he has a lot to process and heal from; he's right in the middle of his own recovery.

Heaven will not change, it cannot be changed. The entire institution is working as intended, and the intention is to be abusive, manipulative, and have as much power over everyone as possible. You cannot fix that, you need to get rid of it.

Aziraphale has good intentions, but he is also still trapped in that abusive household because he never moved out, he is the sibling that stayed behind, just mentally instead of physically.

Hot take, but many people in this fandom are incapable of understanding that "Aziraphale is acting based on good intentions and is still actively being abused/traumatized" and "Aziraphale did bad and unhealthy things and his relationship with Crowley was co-dependent and toxic" are co-existing. Both are true.

Both. are. true.

He did messed up shit out of a trauma response, but he is still responsible for his actions, and at the same time he deserves a chance to heal and move on from it. Please, at this point I am begging people to understand that this is not a black and white issue.

Crowley did not reject Aziraphale, if anything, Aziraphale rejected him.

Crowley said no to returning to an abusive environment for an impossible task. Crowley said no to sacrificing his mental and physical health for something that he knows will not happen. Crowley, for the first time in his life, set a clear and final boundary and put himself and his life over Aziraphale's wishes.

That is a good thing. It is necessary.

Season 3 will not be about Aziraphale fixing heaven or preventing the second coming (if anything it'll be accidental just like in season 1). It's going to be about him finding his way out of his abusive household and into a healthy environment in which they're both free and can heal.

Apart AND together.

It's not happily ever after, it's not perfect romance, it's not "soul-mates" or anything. It is messy, it is real, it is complicated, and I am so fucking tired of seeing it reduced to "love conquers all".

[trebuchet151]

If you’re up for it, I’d love to hear more about Corey! What kind of villain he is, what his goals are, anything you’d be willing to share? No pressure of course! Love seeing your art

Starting with a heartfelt thank you for your interest in them, I think my blog has gotten more attention today bc of your reblog than it has collectively since I made it lmao. I am a huge fan of your sidestep too actually, I've only recently quit being just a lurker on this site but I've always loved seeing Richard cross my dash.

I'd LOVE to share about Corey!!!

I'm not 100% sure on a canon route yet, but for now this is one of my favs

Under a cut for length

Back during the sidestep days, they were known as a vigilante, specializing in tech and tactics. Once Anathema and Ortega broke the ice, they really opened up and became very social (comparatively anyway, theyre still a homebody) and were very involved in their community in like a local cryptid way ("honey, the masked stranger that cut the boot off my tire is on the TV lurking in the background of a rangers interview"). Very stray cat affection style, went from "i hate you dont touch me" to being in Themmy/ Ortega's space constantly. They have absolutely terrible mental health that was somewhat on the mend thanks to the support of their friends until they went and got the "taste the metal"/"one more day" path during the heartbreak incident .

During Rebirth, they're much more withdrawn and dissociative. In the time since the heartbreak incident they have become much more cautious and try to avoid combat whenever they can, taking telepathic boosters and speed/jump-jets as their armor enhancements. They blow up the museum while maintaining a no kill status and take the villain name "Heartbreak" (i love the angst that one brings). Corey blames themselves for what happened to them and their friends (sidestep/past self nemesis), and their motivation is their anger over everything that's happened to them.

Corey changes nemesis/motives between rebirth and retribution. Their more social nature starts coming back as their relationship with the current rangers and mortem improves and they go to therapy, which mellows them out a lot. They begin to wonder if they're doing the wrong thing (current self nemesis) and change motivations to "show the world the truth". Heartbreak becomes an anarchist, dedicated to exposing corrupt politicians with the least amount of violence possible. Their irresistable urge to monologue about how fucked up things are makes both Ortega and Chen sympathetic and suspicious.

For now, Corey's got a mirror image puppet named Mallory. Ideally, the puppet would be a woman for maximum gender crisis, but I love the scene in Ortega's romance that has him call the puppet by sidesteps name, and that only triggers with the mirror image achievement.

I have played ALL the romance routes and adore everyone, especially Dr. Mortum (Corey's new best friend), but the friends to lovers with Ortega wins me over, so Ortega is winning the canon route by a very thin margin.

I'm having a very hard time figuring out Corey's gender issues, bc we have dysphoria in opposite directions. I *think* they're agender, but that might change over time who knows. They're gonna come out during the story whenever that gets addressed, so He/him and They/them are both applicable

My favorite retribution ending so far is where Corey goes to see HG themselves, crashes, and is revealed as Heartbreak, but Ortega breaks them out anyway.

Thank you so much for your interest in Corey! I love them so much and am thrilled to share <3

I'll put together a more coherent summary of their lore eventually, but hopefully this is good for now :)

[prince-simon]

holaa

curious fun question(s) to hopefully make you smile after so many when is the next chap out and are you still alive or have you already joined the holy god of gay? preguntas lol

what were wilmon doing (or not doing) when they spend the night at zarzuela after simon's attackers were caught while relearning each other ? (since the (physical) description is both vague and super detailed wtf?? haha) any unkown spicy or thoughtful thoughts you wanna share abt it? was the scene planned early on? what was changed in the process? and why? thinking back, how was it for you to write it in the middle of sm pain going on plotwise? did it mess with you? do you think this evening/night at simon's childhood room was fundamental in their healing and simon's trust in physical touch? could the awful situation have their love ripped apart (since wille was worried it'd not be as 'before') or was it always sure they get out of it together and in more or less one piece? is simon now wille's sunflower or his heather? ;)

mucho amor och churros to you <33

hiiii let's ignore that this ask has been sitting in my inbox for so long pls thank you for this ask i'm obsessed with it and it did make me smile when you sent it and it's also making me smile now but also pain!!!! bc it made me reread that specific scene. i've also dug around in my beta readers server for thought processes around this scene so hopefully this is gonna be somewhat coherent lmfao

was the scene planned early on? it really wasn't at all. and it actually was supposed to be a smut scene in the beginning haha i told my beta readers, yo, i think we're gonna have some coping smut and then over the course of a week (how crazy is it that that's 2 1/2 years ago now!!!) i wrote this scene

what were (or weren't) they doing? what was changed in the process and why) as it developed i got to a point where it just didn't feel right to show them having sex because it was such an intimate moment for them that even just writing it i felt like an intruder. i said to my beta readers at some point that wilmon can have sex off screen so i think it's very much up to reader interpretation at this point. but "on screen", in the chapter, they were really just touching each other and coming back into their own bodies and to each other

how was it for you to write it in the middle of sm pain going on plotwise? did it mess with you? it was. a lot. to put it simply haha. i mean generally speaking the entirety of chapters 10-12 were the hardest thing i've ever written, emotionally speaking. i think this little screenshot was me in the middle of that scene lol: and this one was after i'd just finished the scene (and the chapter): was the scene planned early on? it really wasn't at all. and it actually was supposed to be a smut scene in the beginning haha i told my beta readers, yo, i think we're gonna have some coping smut and then over the course of a week (how crazy is it that that's 2 1/2 years ago now!!!) i wrote this scene

what were (or weren't) they doing? what was changed in the process and why) as it developed i got to a point where it just didn't feel right to show them having sex because it was such an intimate moment for them that even just writing it i felt like an intruder. i said to my beta readers at some point that wilmon can have sex off screen so i think it's very much up to reader interpretation at this point. but "on screen", in the chapter, they were really just touching each other and coming back into their own bodies and to each other

how was it for you to write it in the middle of sm pain going on plotwise? did it mess with you? it was. a lot. to put it simply haha. i mean generally speaking the entirety of chapters 10-12 were the hardest thing i've ever written, emotionally speaking. these two screenshots were from in the middle of writing that scene and after i'd just finished it (and the chapter):

so yeah it definitely messed with me. i can't say how long in total it took me to write chapter 10 but i do remember having to actively take a day or two off writing in between and implementing some serious self care to make sure my own mental health wasn't completely plummeting. i think it was definitely good that i had my beta reader team behind me to suffer through it with me but also to help me cope and distract myself with silly things so shout out to them always!

was that night fundamental to their healing/simon's trust in touch? i think after the hell they've been through over the past couple days, they definitely needed that moment to remind themselves that they're still alive and that they had each other. so i guess, yes it definitely was fundamental to the healing journey going onwards. i think they needed it to be able to keep going bc we know that chapter 11 was a whole other shitshow but i think without that intimate moment, everything would've been even more fragile

could the situation have ripped them apart? i think if wille hadn't learned to love and respect himself and his own boundaries as well, it would've been hard for them to meet on common ground again, and if they'd stayed together it would've turned so toxic. but because they both learned and grew, they managed to push through (but in any scenario, i think they would've fought for their lives to stay together)

is simon wille's sunflower or heather? heather :)

thank you thank you thank you for this ask i had so much fun answering it and diving into that scene again! hope i wasn't rambling too much and you're satisfied with the answers hahah! <33

[sparkle-skitty]

FANFIC PIECE/GLIMPSE

I spent a STUPID long time on just this ONE BIT here so I am showing it to everyone whether y'all like it or not

For the record, this is just a scrap from the fanfic I am writing (attempting to) and because I am not a linear writer*, everything here is subject to change if/when I get to stringing it all together more coherently. So basically, it's a demo.

I proofread it a few times, but it may not be perfect because I am tired and also was originally writing entirely third person instead of second person but found myself mentally scripting in second person - so if anything sounds wonky, I'm all ears!

(*Meaning, I do not write start to finish, I write exactly what I feel like writing regardless if it's chronologically next. The scenes are coming to me in patchwork!)

Anyway, click read more for the excerpt.

CW for: mentions of child abuse, mentions of bullying, very slight blood, very slight violence, emotional outbursts/shutdown (y/n is neurodivergent), dislike of children (again, y/n is neurodivergent), aaaand I'm not sure what else to tag so lemme know if something is needed

(For the record, y/n has some of me plus some other things I've seen with other neurodivergent people written into them so HOPEFULLY it sounds at least somewhat relatable to others in the community)

You nearly ran into one of the play structures, too interested in watching what was going on by the door to the Daycare. An adult was getting more and more agitated, while Sun held a child behind him, with unimpressed and shrugging daycare workers passing to leave as their shift had ended. The only one who had remained had been talking between the adult and Sun, but was now finally giving up with a very loud "ugh!", throwing her hands in the air as she turned away to clock out.

It was now out of sight, and you were quickly putting away the armful of toys you had carefully balanced against you into the trunks they belonged, in order to get back to the scene asap. Your Employee Fazwatch buzzed on your arm, at first making you growl "Ugh, now what?!" but your irritation evaporated as you realized it was a message from Moon.

"That adult is not one of the child's authorized pick-up persons."

Moon must have caught you staring through the cameras. You instinctively glanced up at where you knew the nearest one was, knowing likely Moon was staring back from his little cyberspace world in the Attendants' shared body. But you quickly turned heel and speed-walked over to Sun.

You were certainly frustrated that, once again, poor Sun had been left behind to deal with the remaining Daycare children alone, but you were more angry now that they had so purposefully let him take the fall for the rules and regulations that even Fazbear Entertainment had to follow by law.

"You'd think by now I'd be over this," you thought. "Not like I've never had a job before where everyone was only looking out for themselves." But you knew very well it was because it was Sun, your friend, the sweetest guy in the world (probably), that you took it so personally. And also, maybe a little because most of the workers still treated him like a mindless machine, aaand possibly because a child was involved in a potentially dangerous situation.

Okay, maybe it made a little sense to take it personally.

As you drew closer, you realized Sun's hold on the child wasn't to keep the child from going to the adult, but rather the opposite - to keep the adult from getting at the child. At every turn he was putting himself between the adult and the child, and the boy looked nervous to say the least.

Your anger suddenly sparked into a blaze of fury upon the sight. No matter how much your rational side tried to tell them that it could be only because the tone of the conversation was scaring the kid, your feral inner child was screaming for blood, having the scene be a bit too familiar and hitting too close to home.

Sun caught sight of you from the corner of his eye, and turned to look with relief that someone might be coming to rescue them, only to be a little taken aback by the absolute darkness that was emanating from your being. The dangerous glint in your eyes, the snarl that curved your lips, revealing teeth tightly ground together - it was something he hadn't yet seen from his new friend. But once you looked at him and you both locked eyes, he saw a metaphorical mask rapidly apply, especially as you noticed the man had finally looked to see what Sun had been gazing at.

The mask replaced the baleful expression with one far more bright, friendly, and chipper. Though the animatronic could see the cracks in the disguise himself, he knew it was practically impossible for any random person to see. He couldn't help but stiffen as you approached and settled beside them. He had only worked with you for a short time, but it seemed so out of character!

"Hi there!" you greeted, launching into your Customer Service Voice, enthusiastic with a great smile, your eyes crinkling. "Is there something I can do for you?"

The man waved his hand around in anger, "It's about time someone came, besides this damn robot!" Sun tensed at the word and the inflection, but stayed quiet, watching with interest at how you hadn't even flinched with the man's loud and sharp tone.

"I am so sorry about that, looks like we're the only two left in the Daycare right now! What can I help you with?"

"Tell this metal idiot to give me my nephew, will you? I'm already running late!"

You turned to Sun, smile never faltering. "Hey Sunny, is there a problem?" you asked openly.

Sun caught the hint and quickly replied, "This person has not been set as a designated guardian for this child in our system."

"Ah, well!" you turned back to the man glowering at the both of you. "I'm afraid that we can not legally allow you to take the child from the Daycare, sir. I'm terribly sorry, but I'm sure you can understand the reasoning here. Just imagine if those weren't the rules! Kids could be carted off by just any ol' person, even criminals and bad guys!"

As you spoke, you gestured - and even winked - with great enthusiasm. Your hyper-upbeat tone not once fell, but the language used was definitely a subtle accusation.

"I'm afraid you'll have to forgive my friend here, but that's the protocol!"

"I want a manager!" the man spluttered, now thoroughly furious.

"Oh!" you exclaimed, a hand going to your mouth before you tilted your head in a bow. "I'm terribly sorry, again, sir, but..." you then lifted both arms towards Sun, gesturing as if presenting him for the first time. "He IS the manager. It's his Daycare after all! He's the boss, the head honcho, the big cheese, emphasis on the big part," you quietly added to the end, tone now finally slipping to indicate the threat.

Sun couldn't help but also notice that you were doing your nervous trait of babbling and trying to joke. But he wasn't so sure this was anxiety or a matter of barely containing yourself.

"Please leave before we have to contact security," you said after a moment of silent fuming from the man, optimism now back but with an edge to it, giving firmness to the command. "If the rightful guardian or guardians can not come, they will have to contact us themselves to add you in. Otherwise, we will not be able to release this child to you."

The guy looked around a bit, grumbling and muttering angrily, before very suddenly lurching forward towards you. Sun's arm shot out automatically to snatch the man by the shirt, to stop him and lift him away, but to his shock you made your own automatic response of swiping at the man's face.

Blood swelled from parts of the claw marks on his stunned expression, but not enough blood to actually run. You had mostly gotten him to the side of his face as he had turned at the last second to look at Sun, traveling just a bit across his jaw and cheek.

The facade was dropped in an instant as you huffed and shook from the adrenaline, then shrieked, "TRY THAT AGAIN, I FUCKIN' DARE YA!"

"Language!" Sun quickly reprimanded you, glaring at you. You tore your gaze from the man's bewildered face to look at him, then looked away, snorting through your nose and folding your arms across your chest. He sighed in exasperation, knowing that sort of maneuver all too well from the children and, well, Moon.

"I am not a brat," Moon grumbled in his head.

"I didn't say anything!" Sun internally responded back.

You looked the man up and down, feet now off the ground as Sun held him firm, but he wasn't struggling. You snatched the radio out of your pocket and calmly made the call to security to remove the man from the premises.

Even as the man was escorted out, Sun's internal monitors showed your heart was still pounding away. But when you glanced at the child, your look softened to one of embarrassment, or shame? You knelt down next to him.

"Hey, sorry about that kiddo, that... must have been scary," you mumbled.

Your interactions with the children were always awkward. You had told Sun you hated kids, but on top of that also had no idea how to deal with them. Every time you were like a deer in the headlights, a newborn giraffe trying to learn to walk - unsteady, unsure, and bewildered by everything.

Sun had so far learned that you at least knew enough to be nice to the kids and to excuse yourself when it got to be too much, which was more than he could say for most of the daycare workers, which was ironic given that you were, well... a glorified janitor.

The child nodded, sniffling. There was a pause, and then the boy released Sun's pant leg and ran over to you, wrapping his little arms around you. You were surprised, then cringed.

"Um, there there..." you said, patting his back gently. To your horror, you realized he was still crying and sniffling. Sun watched with amusement as your face silently twisted into disgust. You looked up at him, pleading with him to get the child away somehow, but Sun shook his head, crossing his arms. This is now a punishment, he decided. He knew you wouldn't dare just shove the kid away.

------------------------------------

You were scrubbing at your shirt with several sanitary wipes. The snot might be gone by now, but you weren't sure and still felt unclean.

It seemed like it took forever for the child's actual guardians to show up, and Sun was not only doing the checkout, but also the report about what had happened.

You had allowed that child to tug your hands, hug you, and you even picked him up when he gestured so. Gross gross gross, little snotty kids were the worst. They had no sense of cleanliness or manners regarding germs. You shuddered at the thought of wondering if he even wiped himself, then flopped back into the security desk chair with a groan. To take your mind off your child-germophobia, you pulled out your phone and began a round of Candy Crush.

Your timeblindness caught you up again as you suddenly looked up to see Sun standing on the other side of the desk. He had his arms folded again, and wore a frown.

"That wasn't being a very good role-model, you know."

"Heck off, I'm not Daycare staff, so I don't--"

"Ah ah!" Sun cut you off, "You ARE Daycare staff, buster, even if it's just to clean, and as you so eloquently put it, I'm the boss here. And I say you need to be a better role model."

"Well personally I like their spunk," Moon snickered in his head. Sun ignored him.

There was a moment of silence between you two, before you shrugged nonchalantly. "Oh well."

Sun's eyebrow twitched with irritation. "Don't "oh well" me! You were cussing, AND you got physical with a customer--"

"Not a customer, just a dick."

"Language! Let's just hope you didn't teach the little one to solve our problems with anger and violence."

"Right, let's hope he never believes a grownup will stand up for him again in his life," you growled mockingly.

Sun was stunned, feeling frustration rise. He put his head in his hand and let out an exasperated sigh. "You can stand up for people without resorting to attacking others."

"Not always. Not every time." you answered lowly.

Sun noticed your heart rate was starting to climb again, and you were beginning to shake. Well, if there's one thing about this whole debacle that was a positive, it's the fact you make it so obvious when you're upset or angry.

"Let's calm down," he said soothingly. "This is just a discussion, you don't need to get angry--"

You stood bolt upright from your chair, your voice raising, "This isn't a discussion! You're chastising and-and-and down-talking and-and... belittling me! For defending myself! Because-because what? The kid might see it and-and think, oh man I-I-I should probably do something if someone... if someone just-just.... comes at me!" You were stammering and practically vibrating with the sudden spike in temper.

Sun leaned back with his hands up, a look of surprise on his face. "Woah, woah, woah! Hold on! I'm sorry if that's how I made you feel, but the rules--"

"DAMN THE RULES! The rules are out of order! Th-th-this whole court is out of order! Stupid! Fuck! AUGH!"

"Now that's enough--!" Sun cut himself off when you slammed your rear back into the chair and spun it, rolling it back in the process, and faced the wall. Hands crossed, face red, you slumped in anger and drew in on yourself.

Sun let the silence settle, giving you both time to relax, and for you to come out of your shut down. You pulled out your phone and started blasting aggressive music.

Pinching the bridge of his nose, he sighed wearily. "Y/n, please, I'm sorry," he started, voice calm but raised enough to hear over the music. "I am not trying to treat you less, I'm sorry I made you so angry..." he lifted his head up at a thought. "Wait... why are you so angry? You were furious before, too, when you were coming to check on us."

You didn't answer, but you had lowered your foot and were now bouncing your leg.

"Give it a minute," Moon spoke to Sun. He paused before continuing, a hint of a grin in his voice, "I have to say, it's interesting to see someone put themselves in time out."

"They've shut down, Moonie, you know what a shut down is."

Moon hummed. "They did choose to sit in a chair and face a wall, though."

"Can't you take this seriously?"

Their conversation was interrupted by the sound of wheels on the floor. You had gently kicked off from the wall and were now rolling comically slow towards them. You had lowered your music, and still had a pout, eyes downcast, and your arms crossed. You bumped into the desk without a word.

More silence. Sun waited patiently, shoving down the anxiety trying to creep its way up. Nope! Not gonna go there!

Eventually, you swallowed your pride and spoke up. "I'm... sorry," you began slowly. "I lost my cool. It's been a while since I've dealt with... the public... on a, mm, personal level. And I'm sorry I scared the little guy." As you spoke, you turned the chair to sit properly at the desk, placing your elbows on it and clasping your hands.

You then looked up at Sun, and glared. "I'm NOT sorry about standing up for him. As a general thing. Even if I did it wrong."

"I'm on their side." Moon stated matter-of-factually. "...And don't you dare think what I think you'll think of that."

"The only thing I think of that is that you're both a bad influence on each other."

Sun's shoulders slumped. Well, it's a start, at least. He can work with this.

"Again, I'm sorry too, the rules are a bit of a... erm, a big deal to me, to put it simply." Sun stood poised to offer his explanation, even though Moon suddenly turned sour at the mere idea of talking about... that.

Meanwhile, you furrowed your brows, looking down at the desk again. You were also battling with bringing up some vulnerability, and chewed your lip. He did ask, but is it too awkward to bring up now?

You took a deep breath, "Anyway... I lost my cool because... I..." your voice trailed off with a drawn-out croak, but Sun didn't interrupt or interject. It took a minute for you to build your courage again.

"Well... when I was... a kid," you spoke haltingly, taking your time in order to keep your voice and emotions level. "I was... bullied. A lot. Really badly. Just for being weird, I guess, I dunno... And, nobody helped me. So I just, took care of it myself. Or, well, tried to." You glanced back up at Sun, "That's... ssssorta why I had that, uh, kneejerk reaction, when that dude tried to- when he just- when he came at me like that."

Sun and Moon were both listening intently. It wasn't often their human coworkers would open up, and in particular, you had made yourself a bit of an anomaly with your unpredictable statements and odd behaviour - an anomaly that they had taken a liking to, admittedly. Maybe they just liked anomalous people, since it seemed to be a pattern.

"That... doesn't quite explain what made you angry in the first place, though..." Sun said softly, not wanting to accidentally spook you from talking it out.

You sat back, your chin tucked in and your eyes cast down, and crossed your arms. Sun feared he had in fact actually caused exactly what he was trying to avoid, but you spoke back up.

"Yeah... yeah... the bullies... the worst ones were adults."

Boom. Bombshell.

Sun and Moon would have exchanged shocked glances if they had the ability to. Oh yes, they were well aware that adults could be bullies to other adults, including animatronics, but to kids? Unthinkable! The very notion sent their protocols in a little tizzy.

"Teachers, mostly," you continued. You took a deep, shaking breath. "But... then there were, of course... family members. Specifically my parents. Especially when I started getting into fights, oh they hated that. I was an embarrassment to them for not being like..." you waved your hand around, attempting to find the word, emotions building and causing brainfog. "Y'know, uh, demure and-and delicate and sweet and pretty and... and all that sh- crap..."

You settled back into the desk chair, your arms now laid against the arms of the chair. You still didn't look up, and began idly picking and clawing at the ends of said armrests. You took careful, slow breaths, trying to keep from bursting into a fit of some sort - most likely a crying fit, if anything. It'd been a very, very long time since you'd actually talked about all of this, and for precisely this reason.

"So, um, you can imagine - I think you can anyway - the kinds of things they did to try and--"

"They... they what?! They thought THAT was more embarrassing than their child being bullied!?" Sun exclaimed, flabbergasted.

The suddenness of his interjection widened your eyes for a minute, then you gave a laugh - a hollow, awful giggle that was laced with all the anger, hurt, anxiety, and vulnerability you were feeling at the moment.

"Um, yeah!? Kids will be kids, after all," you sneered mockingly. Not at him, but at the past. "I was just overreacting and causing a scene, of course." You slumped into the chair so low you could have easily slid out. "Of course..." you muttered. Your outburst had been sufficient to release all that negative energy you'd been building.

"So um... yeah... that's why I was... prrrrobably more than a little ready to go feral on that guy... He just had that vibe, you know? You know the one."

[thesoulshyperrealaslacreatura]

Drakenier: Violence as expression and affirmation - Pt.1

It has become a rather well-known piece of trivia (or at least, well-known within the niche internet circles I flow through) that 2010's Nier Replicant / Gestalt had its overall message thoroughly inspired by well, 9/11 - the discourse that produced it, that came of it, and became it. Although it may not be a direct quote, "to kill someone, you don't have to be out of your mind, you just need to believe you are correct" is a sentiment clearly echoed throughout the game; as the many layers of its central and side conflicts drop alongside the curtains to its second, third (and maybe kind of fourth) playthrough, so does what had, for quite a ways into the game, seemed like a story mostly about finding, nurturing and protecting a community - people to call home.

However, the statement above seems to somewhat conceal-so-as-to-merely-hint-at what I'd argue is a much more complex argument the games lay forth, when looked at as one series. I, myself, have found it difficult in the past to distill both Replicant and the wider series as a whole into one coherent message or thematic frame; partly (and beautifully), because there mustn't be one - this singular reading which eclipses the broad range of experiences that people have come to share with the series - such an idea is preposterously reductive. Still, I think that this mish-mash of "the game is about philosophy and tragedy and nihilism and existentialism and society and humanity and life" and whatnot misses a bit of where the different themes intersect, producing further instances of meaning from the text. I hope to discuss the evolution (were I to sound even more pretentious, I might have used the word genealogy, but I would never stoop to that) of a few central concepts surrounding drakenier's "philosophy of violence" and where they seem to have informed or have been informed by other aspects of the works.

Strap in, because just from writing the introduction I can already tell this is gonna have to come in multiple parts. Hopefully my writing can steer away from boring you to tears throughout all of it.

Spoilers for the whole series!

Part 1: Replicant, and the subjective experience gained from that funky 9/11 fun fact

"Blood is sound, sound is words, and words are power"

This quote, almost a chant from Weiss as the player starts to grasp the gameplay loop of attacking enemies to allow for magical attacks, ties in the game's teaching of that system with what I consider to be the most powerful writing from Replicant (I'm going to refer to it as Replicant for the sake of convenience, obviously Gestalt is included in that). And it is deeply tied to what Taro himself has credited as a major source of inspiration for Replicant in relation to his previous game, Drakengard.

In some ways, Nier Replicant isn't introducing a new, foreign idea over the original Drakengard, so much as bringing out new elements from within its predecessors' critiques of the gaming landscape. Though that only really becomes clear by taking future foresights the series would reach into account; this is the point at which it becomes prudent to ask ourselves one question - how might the game's design regulate the player's interaction with the game world? (A question that, if you're at all even familiar with Drakengard, you probably already know the answer to)

From this, we can extrapolate a lot of meaning from how the original Drakengard was conceived: a game about violence, from the perspective of people who were so immersed in their own awfulness and the general precarity of their world that they cannot enact anything but that same violence. And it is that violence which comes to define them.

I'd also like to do the pedantic thing and bring up the fact that violence can be thought of as more than just physical harm, but also in terms of violation. In that sense, when I claim that Drakengard's characters are defined by violence, I mean it in that their reduction of other people to objects serves as an exertion of themselves - the Dynasty Warriors inspired combat of cleansing battlefields as the only win state reflects back at Caim as his only method of building an identity of his own, one based on strength demonstrated from conquering his enemies. You might find that these 'enemies' are violated the moment they're placed into the game as props that sustain its overall narrative.

In fact, this 'loss of personhood as self-affirmation' theme reverberates into another key factor of the game's story: pacts. They explicitly deprive humans of something of themselves - their ability to communicate, to see, to age, to have hair (sure????) -, and reduces both parties into one shared essence, yet it is what permits its characters to have strength through which they find themselves as able to inflict that dehumanization onto others. Dehumanization becomes their characterization, both from the audience's perspective as well as in-world.

Following that, Nier Replicant does not dispute that destruction of the other simultaneously inflicts upon the self both corruption and affirmation. If anything, it only takes measures to strengthen that sentiment, in light of how the added theme of perspective brings forth a need to now more closely study the subjective experience of perpetrating violence. Thus:

"Blood is sound, sound is words, and words are power"

The gameplay system I've anchored this analysis to comes into play; attacking your enemies gives you the literal strength to continue your offense, by design - ridding them of their life force, their blood, perpetuates the narrative, the words being built, the sealed verses of a prophecy you've set for yourself: that of being a hero to your sister/daughter, friends and general community. This even extends to the lyrics of Ashes of Dreams:

"Are we the plaything of fiends or merely the dreams that we're telling ourselves?"

Though we shouldn't forget that Weiss' comment takes the form of X=Y=Z=W, and it seems I've neglected the 'sound' part of the sentence. As I was writing this, my brain immediately made the association between that and Drakengard 3's focus on the power of Song, which, in fairness, definitely was made with the rest of the series in mind - but, in this instance, that sounds like a bit of a lucky coincidence. Still, what the concept of sound brings to the statement doesn't seem too far off from what meaning could be made at a bit more of a general, rudimentary level, that being: our lifeforce (blood) translates into our ability to be heard (sound), thus effectively giving us narratives about the world around us (words), which gives our actions direction, purpose (power).

From that, we can take a closer look into a lot of different aspects of the game. After all, the reason I proclaimed this piece of writing to be so powerful isn't really because I could - and did - stretch its interpretation to its fullest, but also from the way it manifests itself around the struggles of various characters, while being tied to the game's overall systems and world. Emil receding into his identity as a weapon in order to redirect what he sees as his curse onto those who seek to harm his friends - leading to his sacrifice; Weiss, who also goes on to sacrifice himself, does so in the name of putting an end to this now 5-year mission, grown into his own center of existence; Louise, perhaps reacting to the world around her, saw humanity as something to claim from others, and faced erasure upon perceiving herself as incapable of acquiring it. For better or for worse, the moral codes characters create from their own intentions of living become rigid scripts to follow as self-fulfilling prophecies of their own identities.

We can see that, ultimately, characters across both games tend to follow journeys with a general structure of: bleak circumstances > feeling of powerlessness > violence as a misguided means of reclaiming the power to define oneself > entrenchment in violence becomes overbearing, coming to annihilate the very self which sought to instigate it. From the first Drakengard to the first Nier, this hasn't changed a bit. What changed is a distinct awareness in how the self, or what we might call "us" stands in conflict with the generalized other, "them", and where it uses morality as a catalyst for smoothing out the uncomfortable edges of that conflict.

In fact, the annihilation of the self as, paradoxically, an act of self-affirmation is the very core of ending D for Replicant. And this is, partly, where the inciting 9/11 quote comes into play - given our newfound empathetic understanding of where violence comes from, how do we process it? How do we make sense of it? From the way the world is established, the very act of surviving, for both replicants and gestalts, is somewhat tainted as immoral, and predicated on the erasure of an 'other'. It leaves room for later material to find itself more at ease with this question (and those circle back nicely to ending E from the new version, as well). For now, most of what the game feels comfortable in concluding comes from Kainé, who stands in contrast with most characters by fully rejecting the notion of being a moral agent throughout the entire story, yet the game still offers us the chance to save her - it, mirroring the protagonist, relentlessly believes in her. Not even that "she can be better", whatever better might mean, just that "she can be".

And obviously, finally, we can extrapolate plenty of social commentary from this. Playing off of the thematic material introduced in Automata, we could argue that Replicant's plot is, in retrospect, about slowly building up to the depiction of a certain "Death of God" - which, in nietzschean terms, is not merely society straying from religiosity, but represents an irreparable shattering in the very idea of a centralizing narrative that everyone could subscribe to and fit within. So ends humanity, not just as a species, but as a concept; no longer are people able to identify themselves as containing some unified essence of 'humanity', recognizing the other as a complete self in its own right, as they retreat into the violence that was inflicted against them, which they inflict back at the world - to have your totality reduced to a role in a play that the winner gets to write. And in that sense, I'd argue it captures specific facets of a post-9/11 climate pretty well.

Anyway, gonna make a separate post that's just about Drakengard 3, and then one that's just about Automata, but at a later time!

also, this thesis becomes more relevant when the time comes to analyze automata, but it was still helpful in having me think through the previous games, so I'll drop it here as a reference for now, and will mention it more loudly once we come to specific sections later (not about to be the next target for hbomberguy lmao): http://dspace.library.uvic.ca/handle/1828/14525

Cool that there are people writing about it!! Thank you Xinlyu Tan, the goat!!! Would love to go through more material, but I'm writing this for fun on the side... hope anyone reading this has enough fun with it to go looking for more on their own, go extend the discussion further, blah blah blah. Also hope that I make any sort of vaguely coherent point. And, lastly, I hope you enjoy yourself!

[fixfoxnox]

Things have been a little hectic (and I'm exhausted) so take a spicy snippet to fill the time! Hopefully its at least somewhat decent lol

Luke's Spicy Snippets (7)

Pairing: Pirate AU! Soap/Roach/Ghost

Tags: Trans! Roach, breeding kink, cross dressing, spitroasting, rough sex, begging, implied revenge fuck (? Kinda), implied kidnapping, implied overstimulation

"Fucking frills," Soap cursed under his breath. His face was a rosy pink color and his breathing was labored. Still, despite his cursing and frustration, he didn't stop moving his hips. He continued to pound into the man in front of him. "Should fucking cut that thing off of you."

His words earned a muffled moan from the man beneath him and a desperate chuckle from the man in front of him. "Now, Soap," Ghost cut off with a brief moan, "If you did that, we wouldn't have anything else to put him in. He'd have to walk around the ship naked."

"That doesn't sound so bad," Soap slapped Roach's thigh, "Keep you wet and ready for us, eh Bug? Would certainly make it easier to keep you, fuck- oh shit, full."

Roach could only answer with a whimper, after all, with the combination of Soap's cock bullying his cunt and Ghost fucking his mouth, he certainly wasn't going to be able to get anything even remotely coherent out.

"Fuck," Ghost tilted his head back as the sensations of Roach's tongue circling his cock and his cheeks hollowing out around him grew to be overwhelming. He allowed himself a few more moments of fucking into Roach's waiting mouth before he pulled back, preventing the arousal building in him from snapping.

A thin line of spit connected Roach's mouth to his cock and the young aristocrat didn't move to break it. His mouth hung open and his eyes were filled with a low haze. Ghost chuckled at the look. "Can't waste a fucking drop," he knelt down in front of the desk that Roach was bent over on, Soap still fucking into him harshly, "No matter how tempting painting your face is."

One of Soap's hands moved around Roach's waist and he began to rub harsh circles onto his clit, pulling desperate whines from Roach's mouth and causing him to start struggling slightly against Soap's hold. Ghost acted quickly, pinning his wrists down to the desk even as he begged, "Please, oh god, God too much! Too much! Fuck I- oh, ah, I can't!"

"You can," Soap taunted. He was getting closer and closer to his breaking point. With his hand abusing Roach's clit, the other man had started to clench around him, his cunt was practically sucking him in and his walls were fluttering tightly around him. The feeling was fucking phenomenal and very quickly pushing him toward his finish. "That's what happens, when silly aristocrats try to trick us." He chuckled to himself.

"I mean," Ghost gave a similar chuckle, "did they really think we wouldn't realize who you were?" He stood up and pressed his hips forward, rutting his hard cock against Roach's cheek, "Fucking pretty little thing like you, you were doomed the second we spotted your ship." He tilted his head back and gave another moan, releasing one of Roach's wrists to grab at his hair. "Fuck, now we're going to keep you."

"You're never- shit, fuck so fucking tight, never going back to those fuckers," He leaned down, pressing his chest flush to Roach's back. The fabric of the dress Roach was wearing rubbed at his nipples, adding to his pleasure. His mouth moved to trace along the exposed skin of Roach's shoulders. "We're keeping you, and to make sure no one will take you, we're going to leave our mark."

"No one will want an aristocrat if they know he's been fucking used." Ghost agreed with a grin, "Oh, you're going to look so- fuck, so fucking pretty with our children."

"Gonna stuff you full," Soap agreed, "Make sure it takes. Keep, ah, ah, oh fuck, keep you bouncing on one of our cocks until you can't take any more." Roach answered their words with a long moan of his own, his cunt clenching around Soap's cock and sending him tumbling forward. "You like that don't you? Like being our fucking cum dump."

"Likes the idea of being our little fucking carrier," Ghost taunted, "He'll let us fuck as many kids into him as we want, so long as he gets to have a cock in him."

The words pulled another moan from Roach and, this time, when his cunt clenched tight around Soap it sent him tumbling over the edge. His hips stuttered as various curses left his mouth, even as he came he continued to fuck into Roach, his cum providing a sweet slide as he fucked it deeper into the whimpering man beneath him.

Finally, after several moments he stopped. He kept his hips pressed flush against Roach's cunt and took several long and deep breaths, his tongue licking over Roach's skin as he did. When he finally pushed himself up, he had a bright grin on his face. "Well Simon, your turn."

He slowly pulled himself out of Roach, his fingers prodding at the whimpering man beneath him, pressing any of his cum that dared to drip out back into him. "Please," Roach whined at the feeling, "please, please let me come!"

Ghost slapped Roach's thigh as he rounded the desk. He was quick to take Soap's place at their shared captain's desk. He pressed his cock against Roach's dripping entrance, rutting at him for a few moments, "Come on now, don't you want to be good for us? Don't you want to be good for your," he slid inside of Roach with one harsh move, pulling a moan from both of them and a chuckle from Soap, "captains?"

He didn't move as Roach squirmed against him, whining and pleading without saying a word. "I don't think we heard an answer, Bug." Soap slipped around to the front of the desk, where Ghost had been previously. He pressed his spent cock against Roach's lips, "Answer, don't you want to be good for your captains?"

"Yes," Roach finally answered, his face a bright red. "Yes, yes! Want you to fuck me full, want you to," he paused for a moment before shyly adding, "want you to breed me! Please!"

Ghost immediately started moving his hips at a hard pace, his hand quickly moving around to begin torturing Roach's clit in the same way that Soap had done. The result was a continuous stream of moans, whimpers, and pants from Roach, his face a rosy red and his eyes completely glazed over as pleasure was wrung from his body. That only changed when Soap grabbed tight to his hair and forced his mouth open so that that could slowly feed his cock into the man's mouth, a moan pulling from his throat.

"Thats it," Ghost leaned down to nip at Roach's earn and whisper to him, "Get Soap nice and ready to fuck you again." His hand on Roach's clit moved away before coming down with a harsh smack, pulling a sob from Roach's throat at the stinging pleasure, "We're not stopping until you're stuffed and dripping. We're not stopping until we know that it takes."

[moodymisty]

I see you don't have a lot of Samael posts. Might I request a nsfw ask with Samael x s/o. Let's say they grow really close over a long period of time, and finally s/o decides to lay with him. He obliges and does some magic stuff to make himself about the same size as the Horsemen (I feel this makes it easier). The rest is up to you, go wild, have fun. Enjoy! I look forward to hopefully seeing what you come up with, cause your Samael writing is definitely getting better!!!

[ 𝕸𝖔𝖔𝖉𝖞𝕸𝖎𝖘𝖙𝖞'𝖘 𝕸𝖆𝖘𝖙𝖊𝖗𝖑𝖎𝖘𝖙| 𝕬𝖔3 ]

Author's Note: Hey friend, sorry this took so long. I wanted to let it stew like a fine broth (i forgot) so I hope you enjoy it. A little short, but I didn't want you to wait around any longer.

Summary: Sure, you've never been a religious person, but you didn't think you'd find yourself taking the saying 'Sleeping with the Devil' so literally.

Relationships: Samael/Fem!Reader

Warnings: NSFW, I kept mentions of Samael's size mostly vague, Biting, Bruises, Size difference, Fluff?

Word Count: 793

You feel teeth on your neck; Sharp, ruthless fangs that brush across your skin with a gentleness unbecoming of them. Maybe it's the thought that he's being so gentle, maybe it's just the feeling- but either way, you pleasurably sigh in response.

His rough skin presses against your spine and the backs of your thighs, as he drives you into the mattress. He's slow, but you wouldn't say he's going easy on you. You can feel the overwhelming heat from him, the puffs of hot breath against your neck as he leaves it covered in marks that'll surely bruise or at least be achy for the next while, the way his weight feels just to much.

You want nothing else. It's the only thing you've thought about for months.

His wings shift as he lays overtop you, still tucked somewhat close to his body but still laying around you; If someone entered the room, they'd barely be able to see your form.

In a way it's as if he's smothering you; Consuming you as his hot, scaled skin brushes against your own.

"You're so soft, little one."

You don't feel soft, you feel wound tight like a spring about to snap, nails digging into sheets already ruined by the nature of a demon being on them. He wasn't meant for them, he wasn't meant for this bed as his body spills off of it like a glass overflowing with wine; He wasn't meant for you.

But you don't care about any of that nonsense, by whatever god is listening if any you'll make it work.

Your back arches, pushes your hips back into his as he fucks you at such a languid pace, even though it still has your face feeling boiling hot. It feels like he's been torturing you like this for hours, teetering you at the precipice and pushing you over until you don't have anymore left. Making up for all the time spend dancing around each other, the unknown of taking a step past an already peculiar friendship. It's not exactly a secret a human and demon on speaking terms is odd, let alone being anything more.

Your body struggles to take him- it wasn't meant to- teetering on the edge of it being too much. But that edge feels so overwhelmingly sweet. It's hard to even form coherent sentences, mumbling to him that his skin feels like fire, that you're so, so close; That you regret not telling him you loved him sooner.

Maybe that's why he insists on being so slow; Dragging it out for hours and leaving you a mess beneath him. He feels the way you tighten around him as you finally come again with a hoarse voiced whimper, no more energy left. It feels like it's been hours, and your stamina is no match for a demon.

He relents, if only to make sure he doesn't hurt you. His one weakness, perhaps.

Slowly Samael pulls from you and watches as you shift on the wrinkled, torn sheets, pulling a blanket that had been kicked off the edge of the bed back over your body.

When he shifts, you instantly reach a hand outward and grip what little of his arm you can wrap your fingers around. Which isn't much, but you still attempt to hold him still anyways.

"You aren't leaving, right?"

He hadn't even considered it. The demon laughs and returns closer.

"No."

Samael adjusts and moves to lay comfortably beside you, and you shift and wiggle until your tucked up against his chest. He would've moved you there if you hadn't done so yourself, so he's more than pleased.

His hum rumbles almost like a purr as he moves to press his face against your neck. You see his long tail gently sway back and forth incredibly slowly over the edge of the bed, tip just brushing against the floor. There might be morning sunlight bleeding through the window, but you can't quite tell.

"Not concerned about a demon as your bedmate?"

His tone is teasing, sultry and soft. You look up at him through the dim light.

"Was there ever a point where I implied I had good survival instincts?"

Samael laughs, chuckling and you feel it vibrate his chest against your body. His lips brush against your skin as he responds.

"Perhaps not."

It's of no mind to him, his breath shifting your hair as he leans in closer. You have him now to protect you instead, as odd as it might be for a demon to say. Though Samael has always been a little bit more curious and exploratory than less ambitious demons.

Samael watches as you close your eyes, tired and content as your hands gently grasp for him.

[totally-sapphic-posts]

hi, so i might have my first date with a girl on monday, and i might be *slightly* panicking!! for context, i’ve known i’m queer for a while, but im still struggling with a lot of stuff (thank you to internalized homophobia), but im working on it. and i think i want this to work, but i have no experience at all, like in general. and im really stressed about how it’s going to go, im scared i might be too platonic, or just too in my head in general since i tend to be like that anyways. and yeah. im worried it’s all gonna turn sour for some reason

First date’s exciting!

I can give some tips on not being too platonic.

• when you give compliments, your wording is important. Example: ‘omg you’re so pretty!’=platonic, ‘you look really beautiful’= more romantic

• if you feel comfortable at any point in the date and you guys are walking, offer her your hand. You don’t have to straight up ask, ‘do you want to hold hands’. I know I personally don’t like asking out loud, so I just offer my hand and it’s up to them if they want to hold or not. If she doesn’t take your hand, don’t worry, she might just not be there yet, but it’s not the end of the world. Shrug it off and move on with the conversation, she’ll feel more comfortable. It’ll help if you keep the convo light here.

• if you guys have been talking for a while, maybe consider buying something small/making something small (simple bracelet or something) and on the date, say something along the lines of, ‘this would look pretty on you’ and put it on her. Or you can say you made/bought it for her. But iwl, I like ‘forgetting’ to ask for it back at the end of the date 😂 then telling her she can keep it because it looks pretty on her.

• try to do things on the date that will let you talk more (not movies). This is a personal preference, but can help with getting to know each other and not awkwardly glancing at each other in the cinema.

I could go on and on with more specific things, but I think the best thing to do is just be honest with each other while you’re getting to know one another, and slowly navigate more intense topics (probably best for later dates 🤞).

Just go with the flow as much as possible and maybe be transparent about your feelings with her. Tell her you’re nervous for the date, but really excited for it as well. Who knows, maybe she feels the same and can be an icebreaker for the two of you.

On your internalized homophobia, I’ve been there, and I really hope for the best for you. I actually used this blog in the beginning to help with my internalized homophobia, and used the space as a validation for the attraction I had for women and to let myself know that it was alright.

I hope this was helpful, my thoughts have been a bit all over the place lately, so hopefully this came out somewhat coherent 😂❤️ all the best to you, anon

[the---hermit]

@serendistudy sent me the most beautiful wintery card, and yes I am still posting museum pics.

02|12|2023

I am cold and sleepy and I can hardly focus on my book during the day so I am glad I am still doing the relistening of the magnus archives, because it's keeping me company. I have been midly productive today with more low energy tasks, but I am happy I finished brain dumping everything I want to say in the lecture about my experience working on my thesis. I feel like the biggest part of the job is done, now I just have to figure out a way to structure my speech, and I might do that next week. I also realized that I am actively avoiding working for my English lit class because it gives me anxiety for some reason. Hopefully next week I'll be more energetic and manage to read some articles to finally write my paper. Another prority is going to be reading and writing notes on the book I have to study for my power practices class. I wanted to create a to do list with deadlines for myself but today I was too mentally tired to do that so I'll either do that tomorrow if I feel like it or on monday afternoon.

calm hobbit winter activities and productivity:

read first thing in the morning

finished fixing and highlighting the lecture notes of my power practices and men theories class

continued working on the material for the lecture i'll guest in at the end of the month (I am writing down a bunch of ideas that I will later organized in a somewhat coherent speech)

reorganized part of my stationary

made a very simple weekly spread on my bullet journal for next week

finished gathering ideas for the lecture I'll have to speak at before the holidays, so now I am only left with putting everything in a coherent order and figure out what I am going to say

Irish on duolingo

today's self care:

took my meds and supplements

low energy tasks

warm herbal tea with honey to help with my pains

📖:Bookshops And Bonedust by Travis Baldree